#I'll just write that in my journal of opinions i don't give a damn about

[starlight-archer]

Edwin and Crystal at the start are so "I know you are but what am I" / "oh yeah well I'm rubber and you're glue" in the way they bicker and it is so endearing I love them

[mrhaitch]

Hello Mr Haitch,

I'm sending this to both you and Haitch, so if you are seeing double that's why. I don't know if I'm looking for advice, an opinion? Maybe just talking to either of you will provide me with solace. Please bare with me as I write this - and you read - as words are not my strong suit.

So, I'm 19 - almost 20 - ( scary stuff ), and I just feel.. well, is there really a word? Alone; regretful; fucking empty. I haven't even lived through a quarter of my life yet, and I already feel as if it's been wasted. I know that there are still so many years with experiences I will remember in my rocking chair, and I don't plan to go down that route by any means. Because I want to live. But, I'm so tired. People need people, but I am not needed by anyone nor do I have anyone to need. I mean, quite literally one of the people whom I care the most for in this world is in my god-damned head. Of course, I have my family but that's different. It always is.

You're not a therapist, so I won't rattle on any more about this and that because it's not fair to burden you with a stranger's issues - this isn't even half of what I want to scream about from the fucking rooftops though. But, I'd like to say: here and now, that I want to change. And, y'know, I saw this quote once - about change ( it's not something I really feel comfortable with ). It went along the lines of: " I want to do this; But, I'm scared; Then do it scared. "

It'd be nice to not be scared of doing it.

I'll make a deal with you, not that you have to agree. I will message again in a month, maybe two, maybe in a year's time - who knows. An update, based upon what I have written and whatever your reply may be. No pressure, eh?

---

And, finally, one last thing: I would like to express my gratitude for both you and Mr Haitch on this platform - your dynamic, companionship ( both seemingly physical and online ); I envy the love you share. Not to just each other, but to us. Strangers through a screen. I never would have found you had it not been for Tumblr, so I appreciate that and you.

Speak to you again soon (I'll be waving at you behind my screen whenever you two post something new ). x 🌻

You have recognised something in yourself and made that commitment - there is no advice you need, either from us or anyone. It's a big step, and you've already taken it.

One thing I will give is a quote I wrote at the top of my journal when I started my PHD, and recite to myself when I'm about to make a big decision or do something I'm worried about:

"I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived." - Henry David Thoreau

The essential point is 'living deliberately': make choices. So many of us lapse into holding-patterns or routines that we find ourselves stuck in the weeds with no idea how we got there. Living deliberately means getting somewhere and having at least some notion of why.

Going one step further: love deliberately. I'm with Haitch because I choose her, every day. I look at everything we have, everything we want, and I look at her - then I make my choice. It's why, when I engage with all of you, I try to say only what I mean and can reach inside to the squishier, vulnerable parts of myself.

Thank you for your kind words, and we're here whenever you have something you want to share. Be as bold as you can, live with your chin high, live with your heart open, and learn to remain soft and gentle when the world wants you to have nothing but hard edges.

You've got this.

[kagedbird]

8, 12, and/or 15 for the writing ask if you haven't gotten them already <3

I don't typically get asks, so you are the first 😂 Thank you!

I'll be sectioning this off because it is WAY LONG, but there is nothing like. Adult content or whatever.

Wanna ask a question? Look through these prompts!

8. Why did you start writing? Do you think you'll ever stop?

I started writing reluctantly, actually! I got very bored and tired easily from homework related writing, never really knowing the joys it could bring when you're able to create your own world and characters and build and build and build.

For a time, I just wrote fanfiction without realizing I was writing fanfiction! Just combining my favourite anime and my friends and I in various scenarios. I loved it!

But in relation to the second half, I actually did stop for a very long time. I was incredibly depressed without understanding what was happening, and no matter how much I wanted to write, any time I looked at a Word document, I would instantly fall asleep. My brain shut off because it couldn't deal with the weight on my mind. I stopped for about... seven, eight? Years? Maybe more.

But now I'm hyperfixated and while there are a lot of unfinished wips, I don't think the urgency to create via writing will be reduced for some time. It's become a comfort and legitimate coping mechanism. It has genuinely kept me alive.

This went a little heavier than anticipated, sorry! Moving on—

12. Now that you have more experience, is there anything new you’d like to try (a trope, genre, style etc)? What is it?

Hmm... not really? I have a niche, and that's fantasy haha. Action / adventure is my baby. And so is isekai, apparently.

Self inserts / isekai's give me the ability to see through my eyes and respond to the world around me and the world around me to respond in a way I find realistic. For me, it carries that realism in creating a premise that people can be more legitimately invested in, and fun!

15. In your opinion, why should people give writing a try?

You can literally do whatever you want forever! This goes without saying for all creative pursuits, but I feel like people have forgotten how much............. how less problematic it is to just. Go write your own shit instead of hounding each other or the producers of the media.

Don't like that pairing? Go write about how they break up. Make it messy. Make it amicable. Make it bittersweet. Do whatever.

Feel like you could be a better lover? Write your ass in the damn media all ready, smooch your blorbo! You can do that!

Fuck, I've been doing it for years!!! It's fantastic.

It also is an outlet that is incredibly healthy. It is an avenue most therapists recommend for letting out steam. Remember diaries or journals for venting? Do that with your blorbo, or your most pathetic meow meow villain! Have a sexy dual in the rain while dealing with inner conflict!!! Or whatever you're into!!

The world you create is your own pearl. <3 Have fun.

Thank you for your questions!!!

[yapposrantcafe]

Grab a chair, a beverage, and get ready to either love or hate me.

This blog is a place for me to be honest about how I feel about many things I find disturbing in the world or society these days. You see I'm a disabled middle-aged woman with a grown daughter and eldery mother living with me.

Stress, conflict, and different ways of seeing the world prevail daily here. I'll let you guess which one of our residences likes to stir the proverbial pot and cause the other two to be miserable. This person finds it fun apparently. It's not a happy place to live. Simply being family doesn't automatically equal happiness when amongst each other. It's simply a roof over our heads and a place to survive.

We are not rich but we manage to never miss a meal. Two of Three of us have college degrees that aren't being used. One on social securitiy, one on disability, and one working part time paying only for gas my car.

I should mention that my daughters father died 3 yrs ago and left her financially well off. Not like Trump, Bill Gates, or other stupidly rich people. But enough to put a roof on my house before it became serious, level garage before it collapsed, new fence in backyard to stop dogs from escaping after losing one on the road, and some of the property cleared so we could expand yard. Some invested for her senior years means it's one less thing I need to worry about.

I don't charge my daughter rent because of the money she spent to save the house, I forgot windows and gutters she had replaced, but I would appreciate some help with the housework.

Again, I'm disabled. Seizures, Daily migraines causing my brain to eat it's white matter like MS but in different areas, random weakness of limbs, Central Nervous System (CNS) that short circuits and throws my motor skills out of sorts, anxiety, panic attacks, and depression, all that to be topped off by a pretty much non-existent immune system that's kept me on antibiotics for the last 6 months.

Now you know my situation. I live with people whom I seem to annoy by my mere presence and I'm starting to feel the same way about them. I can't open my mouth without being wrong even if the dog I'm petting is blond, and I call him blondie. I'm not sure how this is wrong but wow does it set off my daughter. Now my mother just says what she thinks is wrong with my daughter, and myself, and how we should act and what we should be doing that we're not.

I feel stuck. I'd sign this house over to my daughter in a heartbeat and rent a tiny apartment somewhere but I'd have to take my mother and both pomskies so it'd not be much of an improvement since I can't drive, and neither can my mother who has bad sight.

Now you know a bit of my situation and the reason I want, no need, to write this blog. You see i keep a journal for my personal stuff to try and help me stay sane but there's another problem that involves the people around me, even those who aren't related. If I have an opinion or thought on a topic they become aggressively upset and it starts a conflict.

I don't do conflict unless absolutely needed. It stresses me out and causes my health to deteriorate rapidly. So, I try to avoid it when possible. This would be the reason I'm sitting in my room with the dogs napping on my bed writing this someplace no one will likely find it or give a damn if they do run across it.

This, my personal journal, meditation, and other stress management techniques in my room are my only solace these days. I'm fighting to correct my health and waiting to find out if I qualify for IVIg therapy to boost my immune system. It's expensive so if insurance doesn't ok it I will live on antibiotics till I build a resistance and finally pass from some respiratory something.

Everything is so full of stress I will take any outlet to depressurize it and wait till I've hopefully saved enough for another long weekend just by myself in 6 months if I don't have another seizure.

[tsukidrama]

Hello! I have not had WiFi for the last little while so excuse me!

I really loved chapter eight, actually it's one of my favorites since the first and I'm so glad Annie and the reader are reunited. I did get your response to my comment on AO3 and... boy am I worried! I understand that there's a lot they need to address (including but not limited to: the Nose Breaking), but I just wish they could cuddle and kiss and be happy. I'm in it for the long haul, though.

My spring break starts next week, so hopefully then I'll have more free time to work on the sequel to my Annie fic AND to reply to you faster. Also, I feel like most of Papa's character is being a grumpy old man and that's kind of... endearing? I like the redemption arc you're giving him, and if he doesn't deserve to be redeemed that doesn't matter, Annie deserves a good dad.

oh damn, it's been a minute, i'm so happy to see you again!! you came back to... a lot lol. it's good that chapter 8 is the most recent one because it really is one of the best. I TOLD Y'ALL I WAS GOING TO ATONE FOR MY SINS OF CHAPTERS 4, 6, AND 7. i owe all of you some genuinely happy interactions.

you're the only person who i feel bad for putting through this angst lmaoooo. i know i keep saying that it's going to get worse before it gets better, but Annie hasn't even hit her rock bottom yet. next chapter people are going to be wailing in my inbox cussing me out, probably. my poor sweet pink anon, i will protect you from the angst that i put out into the world!

yay! it's nice that you'll have a little bit of a break for a bit. i'd love to talk more!! i was really starting to miss you

SLKFBLKB YES! THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I'M GOING FOR WITH PAPA!!! he cares about Annie so much, he's just... kind of an asshole. he's putting forth effort which is better than he ever did in canon. you phrased it exactly right: i don't care if he deserves a redemption arc. Annie deserves a father who loves her and i will take the Papa that she has with his warts and all.

> I don't really "agree" with Attack on Titan's canon for many reasons (see: antisemitism), which is why I'm so attached to your writing I guess. Your interpretation of characters like Annie and Papa and even background characters in the fic like Mikasa, Pieck, Jean, and Connie just feel more right than canon. You really have to do things yourself if you want them done right, I completely agree. <

yeah...... it's... not great......... it makes me really sad actually that the anime is so popular, not because i don't like it but because i think a lot of people just don't know what to do with it. it's so much more complicated than the casual viewer can take in. a lot of the narrative is presented in such a biased way that you HAVE to do critical thinking if you want to like, actually understand. i might be explaining it badly but this isn't any kind of legit analysis or opinion that i wanna open a dialogue on. just something that i believe.

tbh i have a lot of issues with the show but in some ways that adds to the experience. i guess that i like the challenge as a writer... and since I'll never write a big long academic essay on snk, I'll just explore the fuck out of the aspects of the show that are interesting. trnt specifically is incredibly therapeutic on a personal level.

> I'm currently acting like I didn't burst into a dumb smile at your compliment! Thank you! I would also like to thank you for your comment on my fic! It really made my week that much brighter, so thank you. <

of course! i meant it, you're a good writer. I'll have to check out more of your writing in the future!

i've never tried bullet journalling myself but hey, whatever works, works! that sounds much more organized than what i usually do, which is either word vomit into the notes on my phone or taking screenshots of something that i unloaded on some poor soul that was on the other end of a creative rant...

i'm very excited to hear about your theories for please be 👀👀👀 part 2 doesn't go into her backstory very much. it's another appeasement chapter for my fans like TRNT 8 was. it was like, okay, here's some hot smut in the eye of the storm before i release part 3, the mother of all angst. LMAO. i'm so excited to hear what you think!

> I hope you're doing good, <

i'm hanging in there! talk to you soon

also this actually really embarrassing but.. you do not need to apologize because i myself have no read the good ending yet........ IN MY DEFENSE mars just writes so fucking much and really fast, it's really hard to keep up with sometimes. plus I've posted a lot recently too. it's okay. it's fine, it's okay... don't worry.

[straykidzs]

twin tag❣

i got tagged by the lovely (and incredibly talented) @angiflxwies, thank youu!

soo, i've thought about it and i think my personality shows a lot of similarities with seungminnie's! let's see.

•we're both kind of quiet...

when i'm around new people or when i talk to new people i tend to be reserved and quiet, polite n patient and all that - same as him i think, if he's experiencing something new - like being an asc host - he's cautious of what he's doing and he needs some time to get used to the new stuff

•... and also really damn loud

buuuut... as we saw on idol room, our seungmin can be vvvv wild and loud too, and i can relate to that a lot. as i said, i think we both need time to warm up to new things and if we're really comfortable with the people and everything surrounding us, we just let ourselves be lmao (i bet you he goes crazy dancing to songs in his room too, i mean everyone does that, right?)

•we're both honest

honest in a way that i don't lie to people as to what i think about them, i don't tell people i like them when i actually don't - you get the point. i think seungmin is similar, i think some members said that he always gives honest and helpful advice? i don't remember who said that or when, but i think i do it like him. if my friends ask me about my opinion, i always try to be straightforward with them, as to avoid awkward situations when they find out i lied to them or something.

•we're both hella sarcastic and i think the devil rests in both our souls

given a situation that i'm comfortable in, i tend to answer sarcastically a l o t, all of my friends can confirm that, i think? if it's over text, some people even have to ask me if i'm serious or joking, because they can't tell oskfkskz

•we're both passionate about we like to do?

even if we don't exactly have the same interests - in some parts they do overlap, for example in our love for music (i think i could say that for every member though, sooo..) or writing, he keeps a daily journal - probably still today - and i don't have the discipline to do that, so i revert to writing small pieces at once when inspiration comes and says hello lmao

yeah, so that's what i came up with🤔 i think, that if i - in some alternate universe out there - i was friends with him, i would be getting along with him pretty well ^-^

for this tag again, feel free do just ignore this - i'll tag: @seungmines @jisungism @flexinonfelix @seungminty @haneurae