#I'll be ready with my tissues to cry
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anotherfanaccount · 1 year ago
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All the nostalgia hits that we get seeing a new srk movie clips should tell you how long he has been here and how long we have loved him.
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This is Samar Anand.
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And this is Veer Pratap Singh.
I love this man and his greying hair and wrinkling face. Keep it on Shah, we adore you like you.
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sugarlywhispers · 7 months ago
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b.katsuki + reader!Quirk similar to him
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Your first year at UA was going amazingly. Not only because it meant it was one step closer to your dream of being a hero, it also brought new challenges and new people into your life. You have made two new best friends: Gouna, a tall girl with an elastic type of Quirk, and Zynu, an exchange student from Greece, who had a fast Quirk. Literally, she was freaking fast.
The first semester of school consisted in getting to know each of the classmates and oneself. Training, studying, physical tests in groups. Also boring tests like Maths and English.
But it has been magnificent so far.
Until the training camp. Pushing one's Quirk to the limit had literally brought you to tears. Being a cold type of quirk yourself, you never thought you would be able to do what you were doing. But you gave your all, like always. You were focused. Witty and ready. Ready to fight for that number one spot in the rankings at every moment of your life. And very loud about it too.
"She reminds me of someone…" Kan-sensei once commented to Aizawa-sensei, smiling amused.
Your black haired teacher rolled his eyes, "Please, no…"
You didn't know who they were talking about at the time, but whomever they were, you decided you would be fucking better.
That camp had been one hell of a test for everyone. 
Or so that's what all of you thought until the day to meet the Big Three came.
Despite other previous years, these Class 1s, A and B, hadn't met them until closer to the end of their first year. Apparently, they had been on a mission in another country.
"Can you believe it??? They haven't even graduated yet and they already go on missions!!" Zynu exclaims, giving little fast jumps as the whole classes 1-A and B awaits for the Big Three to arrive at Gym Gamma.
"Well, our little Y/N has nothing to envy them, right?" Gouna lays her forearm on one of your shoulders, making you smile.
"Ughh, I still can't believe Hawks himself asked you for help…" Zyna smiles so happy for you, her hand grabbing yours and shaking it way too fast in excitement. Gouna laughs at the way your one fast and joyful friend pulls you.
"She was only called because Hero Shoto wasn't around to help."
The annoying voice behind you makes you groan.
"Don't you have anything else to do than to prove how very in love you're with my friend here?" Gouna's words make you snort before turning around.
Hamata Aiko, the one guy that always has an opinion about you –a bad one, if you may add– stands there, all bulky, full of himself and annoyingly looking down at you like you're scum, with hands closed in fists.
"All of you are going to be in love with me once I take down all three of the Golden Trio…" He declares, flexing his arm so his bicep pops out even more. Disgusting.
The look you share with your two best friends, followed by a cackle of loud laugh, brings the attention of most students around.
"I'll bring tissues for when you cry like a baby after being embarrassingly defeated. But that was a great joke, Aiko-chan," you can hear the grit of his teeth at your mockery.
A huge shadow with red eyes suddenly appears behind Hamata. "A joke indeed," the low voice that came from the shadow makes this same boy jump away like a scaredy cat.
You back away a few steps just so you don't get stepped on. Light then clears everyone’s vision and you see this man– this mountain of a man, with red eyes and blond hair, a few steps in front of you. You can’t help but think he’s insanely huge, more than anything you could have ever imagined. And the other two guys that also appear on each side of this blond mountain are just as big. Maybe not in muscles and height, but each of them has a powerful energy and stance that immediately makes you succumb to their glorious presence.
Like… fuck. Like fucking heroes! The biggest ones you have ever seen. Ever been in front of.
And you want that. You want that majestic power. That strength that makes everybody believe and trust that they are the best.
"Hello, everyone! It's very nice to meet you finally!" The green haired one greets enthusiastically as the blond mountain rounds him to let him stand in the middle. You also noticed how the blond one and the duo colored haired one stand two steps behind, giving this greenie one space, giving him the lead. "We are very sorry it took us this long to meet, but we hope to make the best of our time together!"
"He's too much of a sunshine," Gouna whispers at you and Zyna, the latter smiling and nodding. You somehow doubt it. Something tells you he is as deadly as his two companions look.
"My name is Midoriya Izuku, hero name: Deku," lots of whispers and gasps from the students are heard as he turns to his right, where the blond mountain stands with his arms crossed over his big chest, a frown deep in his face, "this is Bakugou Katsuki, hero name: Dynamight," some grunts and groans are heard. You even hear a kid say "this is going to fucking hurt", and you definitely feel that. Especially when you see the satisfying smirk on the blond mountain's face. "And, this is Todoroki Shouto, hero name: Shoto."
More whispers and grunts. Some look excited, others are already lamenting getting to class today. But most of the students are terrified. These Big Three look nothing like third year students. They look fucking Pro, and that shit’s scary. Not even your first day as an intern in Gang Orca’s agency made you this uneasy. (And it’s Gang Orca we are talking about!)
"It's Endeavor's kid," Gouna whispers, eyes open wide in excitement looking at Todoroki Shouto. Her biggest dream is to be part of the fire hero agency, but she had told you how that was a mere dream considering how Hero Endeavor only took fire type Quirks in. You feel sad for her, but still encourage her to at least try it. The “NO” was already a given; what harm could be to try for the “YES”?
Of course, you all have heard about the rumors circling the Big Three and their achievements. You are a liar if you say that, even if they are supposedly rumors, their stories don't ignite a spark of hope and admiration over them. However, being in their actual presence is a whole different feeling.
"So today, we are fighting," Midoriya Izuku smiles, but surprisingly enough for everyone except you, the kindness doesn't reach his eyes. His eyes change demeanor and look challenging, a bit scary even. (Ha! You knew it! He isn't as sunshinie as he looks.)
"We did this exact same exercise with the current Big Three of our first year, but this time we decided to give you all a bit of advantage, uniting both classes for the exercise, so you can have the upper hand." The shiny smile doesn't leave his face, and while most around you sigh in relief, you know right then and there is a fake sense of security. It's a trap.
And by the way some unnoticed snorts are heard from behind greenie, it's more than obvious.
This will definitely hurt.
You realize then, as Midoriya Izuku takes his bow and school jacket off and steps back closer to his own classmates, how his other two companions are getting ready. Todoroki Shoto hasn't his jacket nor his school shirt on already, but a sport kind of shirt that accentuates his defined chest, where the sleeves only cover a bit of his shoulders, arms on display. This is definitely strategic for his own quirk, half hot and half cold. You wonder if the material is actually made to bear and endure the changes of temperature in his body, like the ones you wear. Bakugou Katsuki, on the other hand… Holy. Mother. Of. All Might. He now stands with his whole school shirt unbuttoned, chest and muscles and freaking abs on display, sleeves rolled up his forearms, jacket lost somewhere. You haven't actually had time to admire any type of physics in boys since the year started, being completely focused on your goals and dreams. Now, this hot mountain of a man makes you feel things you haven't before. Is that the feeling of butterflies on your stomach as the tingles travel through your body? Fuck, it’s distracting. (Very much so.)
You have to mentally slap yourself to focus. This is not the time to drool over an upperclassmen.
"This is your moment to try your moves and Quirks, they will gladly take them and give you feedback. But remember, this is a sparring, nothing to seek real harm. Have fun, children," Aizawa-sensei speaks as he walks towards the entrance door of the gym and stands there, away from the bloodbath that is about to happen. (If you had to define what betrayal looked like, Aizawa-sensei’s smirk as he stands there looking should be it.)
You, in a very calculated and dissimulated way, grab both of your friends' wrists and pull them back slowly, away from where the Big Three stand. They don't say anything and follow you. After so many group tests passed, you three have learned to work together very well. And with one look, all three of you understood. If you wanted to at least hit one of them, you would have to be a team. No solo fight could win them. And even then, there was no guaranteed win over them. They look, and you're pretty sure they are, very strong.
All three of them crouch a bit, showing they are ready, evil smiles plastered in their faces like they enjoy each and every little sound that showed how scared the two classes were. 
How sadistic. You love it.
You so want to fight at least one of them, one on one. But you know you don't have a chance to win moving on your own. Yet.
"Should we go first?" Deku suggests, seeing how no young student is brave enough to approach.
It's not that you are not brave. You're not stupid enough to volunteer for death first.
Dynamight and Shoto look at each other for a moment before looking back to the front, both smirking, and then the blond mountain yells, "FUCKING DIE, EXTRAS!"
A blast clouds everyone's sight for a moment, before you have to jump to the side as Shoto slides with his ice way too close to you. And then it's chaos. Quirks and fights are seen and heard around. And fuck, you have to dodge Shouto's ice three more times. Not to mention his fucking fire.
Your best friends and you remain as far from the Big Three as you can. Gouna got caught by a little piece of ice from Todoroki on her right cheek, cutting it a bit. Zyna, on the other hand, in these kinds of environments gets anxious, moving rapidly on her spot, needing release to do something in her fastness tempo. You… you get calculating and observing. Everyone around is losing against the Big Three. They are too strong, too big. Students are falling to the ground like levees, no matter how strong some of their Quirks are. These three professionals know what they are doing and how to do it.
It's going to take more than just guts to confront them.
Then you see it. Shoto is standing close to Dynamight. And if he moves, he comes back closer to the blond as fast as he can. Oh. Are they guarding each other's backs? Your eyes travel around the gym until you find Deku on the other side of the gym, fighting at least a dozen of the students, who are trying to get their one on one sparring. Of course, none of them win, other than detailed observations from the one third of the Big Three and a punch that knocks them out. 
An idea then surges in your head. The one creating way too much chaos is Bakugou Katsuki. Maybe, just maybe, if there's a way to distract Todoroki Shouto, you could have a chance to at least try to take Dynamight out.
Alright, maybe not completely out, but at least a punch or two. That would be satisfying enough.
Your eyes travel to your two best friends, and somehow –even though none of you have any telepathic Quirk– you all know what to do.
You three high five together before running to different parts of the gym. You run towards the build up rocks behind and explode some to create more small and medium ones. While doing this, Zyna is smartly distracting both third year students. Running, flying around them to just annoy them as they try to attack her with their Quirks, which is impossible to target her for how fast she is. Once you're done, Gouna is right there, arm expanding to create like a catapult to throw the rocks in their direction.
"Hey!" Deku yells, but he's been held back by his own fights to do anything. It's enough though to grab his other two classmates' attention.
It's your turn to smirk now at their surprised expression, excitement driving your whole system.
Bakugou's eyes find yours as you say, "Now you fucking die."
The rocks fly their way faster than they expect. Both of them fire at them to disintegrate the rocks into ash. And that's exactly what you wanted to happen. The ash creates a wall of smoke that won't let them see either of you.
Zyna helps Gouna to run fast towards Todoroki Shouto so she could evolve him with her elastic arms and legs, putting him out of the fight. One down.
And you… Fucking. Damned. Shit. Why do you always pick the hardest and most difficult fights? You don't know. But you always win. So, could you win against this big mountain?
Only one way to know…
The smoke helps you disguise yourself in it, but you can feel his careful and ready at all times stance. So you play. A spark of explosion from your ice here, and he answers with another of his own fire one. Creating more smoke. Funny. Another spark of your ice there, and he answers again, groaning in annoyance and pain when a sudden spark of your ice finds his left forearm.
"FUCK! FACE ME, YOU LITTLE SHIT!"
You chuckle maliciously from behind him, right at the moment your ice explosions hit the back of his knees. You're not stupid to even think that you'll be able to win a one on one. You need the advantage in height at least.
How's the saying goes? If the mountain won't come to Muhammad, then Muhammad must go to the mountain… Or well, in this case, you'll make Bakugou Katsuki, a.k.a. Hero Dynamight come to you.
Before Bakugou inevitably falls after that cold blast against the back of his knees that unbalanced him, he tries turning around and shooting whomever it's being a pain in his ass. He doesn't count with the knowledge of how small you are compared to him that you fit perfectly in between his stretched arms that are ready to shoot.
As he falls back, your crazed smile is the last thing he sees before an explosion of white and cold happens just in his goddamn face.
A hard and strong thud is heard as the smoke around finally dissipates, giving one impressive image that leaves everyone around stoic and in silence.
Bakugou Katsuki is laying on the floor. You're kneeling on his big chest, hands with spreading cold smoke, like snow, right at his face. His expression is one of complete taken aback and surprised. Like, he can not believe what just happened, as the smirk it's still on your face.
"Who's the fucking extra now?"
You're both inhaling rapidly, trying to bring your breathing back to normal. Your eyes won't leave his, completely enraptured in his deep ruby color, filled with so much fire it feels like he's trying to melt you. (And you would, if these were other circumstances.)
You then stand up and step back from him, smiling. You fucking won! And against this enormous and angry mountain! Fuck yeah!
He’s still lying on the floor, looking very surprised, so you laugh as you stretch a hand to help him up. Bakugou Katsuki takes it, a little side smile finally appearing as he shakes his head and stands. Now you definitely have to look up at him. Jesus, he’s way taller now up this close.
Before any of you says something, the annoying voice of Hamata Aiko says, "You're still an idiot," and he punches you on the side, making you literally fly meters away and hit your head with the wall.
The roaring scream of "HEY!" from several people is the last thing you hear before passing out.
.
When you next wake up, you encounter the kind smile of Recovery Girl.
"Hi, sweetie. How are you feeling? You took one hell of a punch…"
You groan. "Ugh, don't remind me… I'm going to fucking…"
"Language, dear."
"...kill him to pieces!"
She chuckles amused. "Alright, but first, you should rest. Then kick his butt." Her wink makes you smile in content as you relax in the infirmary bed.
"There are people outside waiting for me to report to them. Want them to get in, or should I tell them to come later?"
"It's okay, they can come in," you nod delicately, not wanting a new headache to deal with.
When Recovery Girl said they, you were expecting your two best friends. Not the Big Three entering the room in a hurry, especially the first one, the blond mountain who enters and walks directly at your side.
"How are you, Coldie?" Bakugou Katsuki asks, his big and calloused hand landing over your small one laying on the bed. You pull up an eyebrow at his nickname for you, but don't comment on it.
"I'm fine, Mountain. My left side still hurts a bit, but I have had it worse."
Bakugou Katsuki growls. Literally, like an angry dog.
“That kid was completely out of line,” protests Todoroki Shouto.
You sigh. “It’s Hamata Aiko. He needs to be the center of attention or he snaps.”
“I’ll snap him in two, give me a minute…” You don’t know if Bakugou it’s being serious or not, but the idea makes you snort as Midoriya Izuku exclaims, “Kacchan!” Todoroki just shakes his head and a small curve of a smile in his face.
“He’s being talked down to by Nezu-sensei. What he did… It's not okay at all. I hope he reconsiders his actions.” Midoriya says, in a stern but worried tone.
“What you and your friends did, on the other hand, was pretty impressive,” Todoroki says as both of his classmates nod, Midoriya more enthusiastically.
“I have never seen Kacchan so taken aback!”
“Shut up, nerd!”
“You were smart and fast and careful with all your moves. You took into consideration how different Kacchan was physically compared to you and you brought that to your own advantage! It was the true thinking of a hero in a dare situation! We were all impressed!” Midoriya rambles, his eyes shining now in true awe.
“Not to mention how in sync you and your friends were. I never expected being gripped like that by arms and legs functioning like ropes. It was funny, and smart,” Todoroki also comments while Midoriya nods in agreement.
You feel the tears in your eyes itchy, so you look down in shyness and smile.
“I… I just looked. Midoriya-senpai was on the other side of the gym, being held back by students so I knew he wouldn’t be able to do anything,” you look elsewhere but them, which is the window next to your bed, “and then I looked how Todoroki-senpai and Bakugou-senpai kept being close to each other, clearly looking for each others back, so I thought that the best option was to try and separate them. By looking at Todoroki-senpai using his quirk, I knew he was avoiding close contact combat, so I guessed that was his weakness. At least if you take him by surprise. So, I knew my friends were gonna be able to catch him. Me, on the other hand, I didn’t know what I was gonna do. I just knew I was gonna give my all to win.”
You finish shrugging, taking a deep breath to finally get the courage to look in the way the Big Three are standing.
They all look at you in complete amazement, pleased smiles on their faces.
“Another nerd alert,” Bakugou comments and Todoroki laughs.
Midoriya looks in reprimand in Bakugou’s direction, arms crossed over his chest. “Well, that nerd took you down very easily, without counting the times I also took you down…”
Todoroki then passes an arm around Midoriya’s shoulder in clear partnership as he prepares to pester Bakugou.
“There’s the fact that she is younger than you, Kacchan…” You think Hero Shoto has a death wish.
“I will blow both of your heads off,” Bakugou responds in a growl, pops already sounding from his hands. Both of his classmates snort in amusement.
Oh, yep, they all have a death wish.
“Oh! That reminds me…” Midoriya suddenly changes the subject, “Your Quirk.”
His eyes open wide and look at you in expectation. You tilt your head to the side a bit confused as you put your palm up and then make sparks of blue and white pop as the temperature around you gets colder.
“It’s a lot like yours, Kacchan, but…”
“Cold. Your explosions are cold.” Todoroki says, directing his hand from his cold side closer to your palm so he can feel the sparks.
“Did they discover how it’s produced?” Bakugou asks, looking very serious in your direction. But he isn’t angry, he’s just observing.
You shake your head. “They said it’s a composition of two or more chemicals, but they still can’t find which ones create this type of reaction.”
“That is a very important thing to know. I would investigate a bit if I were you. Knowing your Quirk to the fullest, even the small things, helps you be aware of the possible weaknesses and advantages you can have. That way you can be prepared at all times.” The professional tone in Bakugou’s voice leaves you mesmerized. He is… good. What he’s saying is so true, you haven’t actually thought about it.
“But, the doctors…”
“Doctors sometimes know shit.”
Midoriya physically slaps his own forehead while saying, “Kacchan..”
“He can’t help it. He’s an ass.” Todoroki snorts.
Bakugou decides to ignore them, not before stabbing them with his glare.
“What I’m fucking trying to fucking say,” you laugh at his foul mouth. He smiles a bit in your direction, “is that go beyond. You take the initiative to learn. Don’t wait for the teachers or doctors to tell you who you are.”
You can’t believe the Bakugou Katsuki is actually being nice and giving advice to you.
“You know who you are… Fucking number one, ain’t ya?” You nod smiling as he extends his hand closed in a fist so you can bump yours with his.
Midoriya’s big and proud smile makes you shy. And it's funny when he exclaims, “Plus ultra!”
Everyone laughs.
And, boy… Did you go plus ultra.
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a.n; this will have a part two. 😉💥♥️❄️
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zayneslady · 9 months ago
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hey!! loved that angst fic you wrote xx can i request the boys reaction to when the reader/mc and them are in an argument, and they accidentally said something extremely hurtful and it made reader cry. make the boys regret it so much pls hehe😼 thank you 💗
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warnings: angst, open ending again hehe and again, reader is not MC
characters: Zayn, Xavier, Rafayel x reader (separately)
a/n: my first request *-* thank you so much! This exact trope is one of my favorites. I hope you enjoy it! Get your tissues ready! Also thank you to everyone's support in my first post! I'm so happy! ❤️
Classification: scenarios
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ZAYNE ❄️
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You didn't want to admit it, but you were sick. During the day you felt a little sore in your throat and your nose was stuffy. Arriving at Zayne's house after work, it was more than obvious that you had a fever. Your face was red and the chills running through your body made you shiver. 
There was nothing else to do, you would miss work tomorrow to fully recover. Furthermore, with the care of your loving doctor, you knew you'd be fine in no time. So you quickly took a shower and after drying your hair, you grabbed a blanket and curled up on the couch with a cold patch on your forehead, waiting for Zayne patiently. 
To your surprise, he arrived at a normal time and your heart vibrated with joy when you saw him enter. He had his head low as he stepped out of his shoes and closed the door behind him. 
"Zayne! Welcome back! How was your day?” You greeted him as he shrugged his coat off. “Guess what," you said, giggling softly because it was quite obvious by your funny voice that you were sick. "I got a little sick after yesterday's ra- 
You jumped a little when Zayne suddenly groaned, whipping his head up to look at you. “Oh my Lord,” he said, annoyed. “Can't you see I'm fucking tired? You do not know when you shut your damned mouth? I can't stand you! Why are you so clingy?” 
Your eyes widened and your face turned bright red. Your mind went blank and you didn't notice the tears streaming down your face until Zayne's face changed from complete anger to guilt. He looked at you from the door as if he didn't know what had happened just now. He didn't recognize himself. How did he dare to talk to you like that when you-
He gasped softly, “you're sick.”
You tried to clean your tears with your hands as you got up from the couch. Zayne made an attempt to come close to you, but you quickly ran to the bedroom only to come back after a couple of minutes with your shoes and coat on. 
“Excuse me,” you said, as you approached the door. 
“What? Where are you going like this? You need to rest.”
You nodded, trying to keep some distance from him. “I know. I'll rest back home. So please move.”
“Stay here. I'll take care of you,” he grabbed your hand and more tears fell down. How could he talk so sweetly right now after what he said. 
You shook your head, pulling your hand away and pushing him aside so you could open the door. “I don't need you, Zayne. Not when you can't stand me.”
“I was wrong, please.”
“I was wrong too. Goodbye, Zayne.”
XAVIER ⭐
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“My poor Xavier,” you mumbled, gently cleaning a wound in Xavier's side. You winced when he did and your heart broke. You knew perfectly well that this could happen because of his line of work, but you felt terrible every time he came home hurt. “Oh, Xav, is it too painful?” You asked as you started to bandage him. 
He shook his head, breathing heavily and resting his head against the pillow on his bed. “It could be worse. Thank you for helping out.” 
“No need to thank me,” you said, smiling at him as you placed a tender and loving hand over his now bandaged wound. “I wish you didn't have to do this. It's so dangerous.” 
Your words had no poison. You clearly didn't want Xavier to suffer in any way. Why couldn't he have a regular, safe job? Maybe he's just strong because he has to protect everyone. You said those words from the bottom of your warm heart, so you were more than surprised to hear Xavier's response:
“What? Are you saying I'm weak?” He spat and you blinked. 
“N-No! I'm just saying that I wish you had another job because- 
“Is that so? So you rather have a bunch of wanderers attacking innocent people? Just because you don't want me to get hurt?” 
“It's- It's not like that! I never said that. I just get worried sick for you and-
“Maybe I should really stop, huh? Just turn a blind eye to everything that's happening like egoist people like you di.”
He just kept vomiting out words, one harsher than the last. Every time you tried to speak and fix this misunderstanding, his irrational words drowned out your voice and it made something heavy and nauseating settle in your stomach. This was not going to end well in any way. 
“Xavier, my love, please listen to me. I do not- 
“Maybe one day a wanderer will actually kill you. And believe me, I won't even bat an eye at you,” he said, crossing his arms and turning his head away from you. 
Your eyes had never filled with tears as quickly as that moment. Your body began to shake with suppressed sobs as you felt heat and disappointment throughout your body. Did Xavier just... wish for your death? And in the hands of a creature as horrible as a wanderer? 
“Oh no,” he suddenly said and you flinched when you felt his touch against your cheek. “I am so, so sorry.” You cried a little harder before getting up from his bed. “W-Wait, my star. Please, I'm sorry.”
No words came out. You simply grabbed your bag and left the room.
He called your name and then groaned in pain as he tried to move. “Pl-please, come back! Where-
You couldn't hear more of his words as you closed the door of his apartment. Did this mean the end? You truly thought so. 
Rafayel 🐠
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"Ah, welcome back, Rafayel!" The amount of excitement that rushed through your body whenever your eyes landed on him was almost overwhelming. It wasn't that you hadn't seen him in a long time, but a second without him felt like a century. 
His eyes, usually warm and sparkling, looked cold and even angry at seeing you in his house. "Hello," he said dryly as he closed the door behind him. You frowned slightly. "What are you doing here?" 
"Hmm, nothing much. I just wanted to visit you. Is that alright?" 
He sighed, placing a paper bag on the table. "Yeah, sure. I gave you a key after all."
You cleared your throat, nodding awkwardly. "Did... you have a good day?" 
He sighed again and shook his head as he stepped out of his shoes. "I didn't. It was terrible for the very first moment I opened my eyes. You see," he started and you nodded, listening carefully. "I overslept so I lost precious time for my painting. Then I didn't have time to eat so I didn't eat anything but a piece of bread."
You immediately got up to make dinner for him, maybe after eating he'd feel better? 
"And the worst thing was," he said, collapsing onto his couch. "I couldn't find my emerald green paint so I had to go all the way to the art store and get a new one! Ugh!" 
You blinked, frowning a little. "Your emerald green?" 
"That's what I said."
"Hmm, I'm very sure I put it in all of your greens?" You left the ingredients aside as you walked to the paints. "Here it is." 
He got up and looked at you with an astonished expression. Confusion quickly turned into anger and he was yelling at you in a second. "Why didn't you tell me?!"
"You saw me last night!" You explained, carefully leaving the paint back in place. "You said you wanted your paints to be more organized and I asked you if I could help you out! You even told me you liked how I organized it by colors!" 
Rafayel let out a frustrated sigh as a hand carded through his hair. "I can't believe I just lost all of that precious time because of your stupid mistake!"
"Excuse me?"
"Every time you try to help, you just mess things up! Can't you keep your little hands to yourself for once? I was just stupid for letting you help me out! You are way too much, I can't stand you sometimes.”
You were stunned. He had never said anything like that about you, you couldn't even remember other times when you wanted to help him and you ruined it. Besides, it wasn't your fault. The green paint was there all along and he just hadn't taken the time to look for it properly.
You knew it wasn't your fault, but his harsh words and the anger and hatred in his eyes were too much. Tears quickly filled your eyes and began to fall down your reddened cheeks. 
Rafayel realized his mistake a bit too late. Letting out a gasp as he watched the first tear fall, he hurriedly approached you, but you backed away, putting space between the two of you. He couldn't say anything, too surprised by his own words.
What was just a moment seemed like minutes, endless hours with deafening silence. Only your sobs echoed around the entire house, until your voice, small and trembling, made him jump. 
“I won't touch your stuff again, Rafayel,” you said softly, avoiding his eyes. 
“N-No, I didn't mean-
You nod, “if you don't mind, I'll sleep in your guest room. Goodnight, Rafayel.”
Deep inside you so desperately wanted him to stop you, but he watched you disappear into the hall and never called you back.
You knew it was going to be a very cold night.
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honeybeedewdrops · 2 months ago
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Photo Gone Wrong | L.Norris
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Summary: McLaren ask Y/N to take a picture of Lando and Oscar holding their first and third place trophy. What could go wrong?
Warnings: mention of a bloody nose
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The McLaren garage was the place to be after the Singapore Grand Prix. "Y/N" Someone called as you walk out of the garage. You stop and see one of the social media managers calling you over, Oscar and Lando close by her side.
"hey what's up" you say walking over to them. "Would you be able to take a picture of the boys holding their trophies for the McLaren socials." You nod and start to get your camera out. "Sure any particular way" You ask. "yeah were thinking like this one" the social media managers says getting out her phone and showing you a picture the boys had taken a few weeks ago.
"oh uh ok" you says not so sure about this picture many things could go wrong. "What? What's wrong you seem hesitant" the social media manager asks "I just what if one of them drop the trophy and break my camera or worse me" you state "come on Y/n don't you trust us" Lando says "You not so much. Oscar he's fine" Lando rolls his eyes. "Come on Y/n" Lando begs "i'll make sure he doesn't so anything" Oscar says "fine" you agree. You get down on the ground and point your camera up "Ok lean in" you say. Lando grips his trophy and nearly drops it causing you to squeal and turn away. Lando started laughing, "Lando" you complain "alright alright i'm serious" he says as the two lean in.
You snap a couple photos and before anyone could react Lando had dropped his trophy. He scrambled to catch it but even with his fast reflexes it was too late. The trophy came to a crash against your face the end hitting just perfectly in between your camera and cheek hitting your nose full on. You toss your camera aside not caring about it and sitting up grabbing your nose, crying out in pain. Blood started to gush out. "Oh my gosh Y/n I am so sorry I didn't mean it" Lando panicked. "I think, I think you broke my nose" you says as tears started to pool and fall. "We need a medic" Lando calls and Oscar takes off towards the medical center at least that's where you hopped he was going. "I am so sorry. what can I do?" Lando asks "Can you maybe get me a towel or something?" you ask holding your bloody nose that was really hurting. Lando looks around and spots a bag a few meters away he opens it and hands you a shirt. A crowd started to form and you started to get embarrassed. You tried not to put too much pressure as if you did it hurt.
A few minutes later Oscar came rushing over a few of the medical team right behind him. At that point your hands and the t-shirt you had were covered in blood. "Hey can you tell me your name" one Medic asks "Y/n" she says as the medic takes the cloth away. "ok that looks pretty bad" He says going into his bag and removing the t-shirt the medic poked around your nose making you flinch any time he'd touch a tender spot. "I'm sorry" he'd say.
Once the medic was finished he handed you some tissues to catch the blood. "Ok now we are going to get you onto the stretcher and get you down to the center" you nod as the three medics helped you up and then onto the stretcher. Lando walked up to you "Y/n i am so sorry" Lando apologies once again. "It's fine Lando I'll be fine" you said as they wheeled you away Lando following close behind.
They get to the medical center where you are put on some heavy medication to help with the pain as well as a blood thinner to help with stopping the bleeding. "Y/n we are going to take you to the hospital to get you checked out and make sure it's not a serious break from the looks of it you'll be fine will just have to wear a splint for about 2 weeks" "ooookkkk" you nod lazily the pain meds really doing some work.
The medic leaves to get the ambulance ready. "Sorry about your shirt" you said holding out the bloody McLaren shirt. "It's ok it's not even mine" he said pushing it back into your lap "oh good" you say and closes your eyes. "Y/n" Lando says "mmhm" "I am so sorry" you groaned tired of hearing him apologise "ugh stop apologising" "I can't help it. I feel really bad" you sighs "I'll be fine Lando" the medic comes back and start loading you into the van. Lando once again by your side. In the ambulance the bleeding had finally stopped and your nose was really swollen and starting to bruise.
Once at the hospital the doctor did confirm you had a broken nose but it wasn't severe enough that you needed surgery just needed to set it back and keep a splint on for 2 weeks.
Lando was very sweet the entire time, he waited the entire time. Even after you begged him to leave to celebrate his win with the team he didn't.
Luckily for you there was a 3 week break in between Singapore and Austin. When the Austin race did roll around you didn't have to wear a splint anymore and the swelling had gone so now it was just really bruised, but many still asked what had happened. 
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hai7ani · 4 months ago
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to win is to lose / rivals to lovers (who were already in love since the beginning)
thinking 'bout how attending an ex boyfriend's wedding while also having to endure the stares thrown your way from the guy you've been sworn enemies and rivals with for god knows how long halfway across the room must really suck. like, both sides really rubbing it in your face, you think 一 that you've lost this time. you're not as capable of love as you think you are, as you'd once boasted to that douchebag of a rival and how you'd thought your ex was the one for you.
except he isn't, and he isn't as well 一 the stares were just him making sure you weren't breaking down in the middle of a wedding and shutting off as you stand and watch with a semi-broken heart as your ex kisses his new bride at the altar, and a bouquet of flowers you've just caught earlier gripped tightly in your hands. a harsh slap to the face, this is.
so when he catches you at the hallway during the after party all alone, really at your most vulnerable as you quietly wipe away your tears with wobbly lips while making sure your makeup isn't ruined in the process, he waltzes over with his hands tucked into his pockets, stands in front of you a little too close for your usual liking, and you cry even harder. you don't have the energy to make another snarky remark to him 一 in fact, you haven't spoken a word to him since seeing him in his million dollar suit when he'd entered the venue without his rumoured plus one, no gifts for the newly-wed (a clear sign telling them to go to hell), and without his usual smug face too, for some reason.
when your tissue decides it isn't able to catch all your tears in time he then presses a hand to your nape forward. his touch is warm, so gentle, and your forehead rests on his right shoulder softly. you don't bother moving and he keeps you there like that, until your sobs have turned into sniffles and you've got an arm wrapped around his waist for some support.
it's when you wrap the other arm around him that he only speaks.
"i'll marry you."
you hear laughter echo in the quiet hallway as the other guests have the time of their lives in the room just behind the wall you're leaning against. is this a mockery? is he fucking mocking me? you've just about had it up to here with him. you want to scream at this man. you want to hit him. you want to punch him.
but your dress is tight so you hook an offensive thumb into the belt loop of his expensive dress pants instead, getting ready to threaten him, until he speaks again.
"so what they're doing this in the plaza hotel?" he scoffs, and your hold on his belt loop significantly loosens. his own around your nape, however, tightens and he presses your body anymore closer to him. you can feel his heartbeat pound in his chest, against your own, as he rambles on and on like the boastful boy you'd met in grade school despite being the ceo of a million dollar company.
"i'll marry you at the beach. new fucking york can kiss my ass, we're going to mykonos." you stifle a laugh at that. "he won't even be fucking invited because he's not ruining it for you, and he's gonna have to hear about our wedding from his mother-in-law."
you're full on giggling at him now as he continues to list out all the things he's gonna be making sure your ex pays for for the evil shit he'd pulled tonight.
"so? what do you say?"
he asks after a pause. when he tilts his head down to look at you he finds out you're already staring at him. wide, glossy eyes gazes into his own and he softens up when you hug him even tighter.
a hand brushes your hair out of the way. you close your eyes and smile. he swipes a thumb on the apple of your cheek.
"we can't lose to them now, can we?"
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#gojo satoru he's so annoying, miya atsumu, haitani ran, haitani rindou, baji keisuke, kuroo tetsuro, hanma shuuji
it's 8am. haven't slept a wink. im so annoying
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greensagephase · 4 months ago
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Nonviolent Communication - Part 17
Pairing: Spider-Man!Miguel O'Hara x Spider-Woman!Reader Summary: Miguel has been distant lately and you don't know why. Word Count: 23.9k Warnings: distant Miguel; he displays similar behaviors from the beginning of the fic, no sleeping and skipping meals; tones/mentions of death; small moment in which reader misunderstands Miguel's words and thinks he means something else (him wanting to be gone permanently); lots of fluff memories; both Miguel and you cry; lyrics for some of the songs (two) will be sprinkled in the dialogue, I tried my best to translate for one, while for the other one you can search it up. You may already know the meaning behind it since I think most of Miguel nation knows this one song already. I think that's it. If you find something else, pls let me know :) Music (Spotify playlist): "rises the moon (piano version)" - goated. "Baila Esta Cumbia" - Selena "Las Mañanitas" - Vicente Fernández (birthday song for Mexicans, at least) "someday i'll get it" - Alek Olsen "pluto projector (melody)" - emptiness "En Familia" - Carlo Siliotto (unfortunately this song isn't on Spotify, but it was one of the two main songs for this chapter. You may find it on YT here) "Luna de Xelajú" - Gaby Moreno, Oscar Isaac (yes, we're bringing it back and you better have tissues ready 🤧) "Jacob and The Stone" - Emile Mosseri Masterlist (where you can find all my other fics, but most importantly, all fanart for NC 🥹) Thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoy!! 🫶🏼❤️
Part 17
The sight of sunlight streaming through the holographic blinds of your bedroom meets your eyes when you first wake up. Yawning, you stretch beneath the sheets, slowly waking up. You roll over on your side with a sigh, staring at the little pockets of sunshine on the floor.
The warmth under the covers keeps you there, anchored to the bed for a few more minutes until you finally decide to get out of bed to start the day. You slip on both gizmos; the one everyone has available to them and the new one Miguel gave you to test for him, removing the wristband you wear around the penthouse due to comfort and to avoid glitching since you’re not in your universe.
Trying not to think about something, or rather someone, you make your bed and get ready for the day. It’s only when you’re done with your bathroom routine that you decide to find out.
“Lyla?” you say.
“Hey - morning,” she says popping through your gizmo.
“Morning… Is Miguel…” you trail off.
“He’s already at HQ, yes,” she replies, fixing her glasses. “He left two hours ago.”
“Thanks.” With a frown, you make your way downstairs. You only check the kitchen out of curiosity, not because you’re particularly hungry. Knowing Miguel is already gone has decreased your appetite. Sure enough, you find a note on the counter from him, stating that he’s going to HQ. With a sigh, you slip out of the penthouse and head to your universe for your usual morning patrol, feeling down about the situation.
The problem is… Today is not the first day Miguel has gone to HQ so early. He’s been leaving the penthouse as early as 5am, unlike the past weeks and months since you’ve been living with him. Typically, the two of you leave together around the same time you’ve left the place today. You have coffee and sometimes even cook a full breakfast, but it hasn’t been like that for a few days.
You eventually arrive to HQ after your patrol, still feeling a heaviness around you. You do your tasks such as working on the weekly report, going on missions, and helping other spider members when and where it’s needed until it’s time for you to head to Miguel’s lab for your weekly organizing.
It’s still something you enjoy doing, especially even more now that Miguel is so much more open than when you first started organizing his lab two years ago. Even if you’re not conversing, the simple enjoyment of being in each other’s presence is satisfying to the two of you.
You look down at the boxes with food from the cafeteria and the drink carrier in your hands as you head there. You’re certain Miguel hasn’t had anything to eat, except maybe a coffee, if even that, so you’ve decided to get him something. Of course, being lunch time, you got him his favorite meal from the cafeteria: empanadas and other sides, along with a water and a coffee.
As expected, he thanks you with a small smile, but it’s one that doesn’t reach his eyes these days. You both eat in silence before you begin to work. As always, you make your rounds and check each surface, seeing what all there is to organize before you actually begin. You do this quietly, noticing that Miguel is too quiet. In fact, he’s been so much quieter the last few days, as if something has been weighting on his mind. Deeply. Terribly.
You’ve found him staring off into his screens several times over the last few days, his crimson eyes unblinking and focused on nothing in particular, lost in whatever has been plaguing his thoughts these days.
His smiles are distant and sad. He’s been unable to give you a true, genuine smile.
To everyone else, it may seem like a normal thing. Maybe they haven’t even noticed it, but you know better.
He’s far too quiet when cooking. His gaze is unfocused when he’s reading in the afternoons. He’s sought more solitude recently, heading upstairs to his room after dinner, and has been working out every day in the private gym in the penthouse building for several hours at a time.
You dared asked him yesterday if something was wrong, in a far more subtle way, of course.
“I’m alright, just tired,” he replied blinking back into focus, raising his hand to move screens around. He was back to working, or well, actually working since he was zoning out before you talked to him.
You continue to work silently now, taking note of the fact that even Lyla doesn’t chat with you like she normally does. She pops in and out, doing her tasks without any banter.
With a heavy feeling, you glance at Miguel. He’s on his platform, his back to you. Your eyes trace his broad shoulders, the tense stance.
Those shoulders.
They’ve carried too much for far too long.
What is plaguing his mind as of now? You can only wonder to yourself.
You carry on with your tasks, giving Miguel his time. You hope he’ll feel comfortable enough to share with you what’s been on his mind soon, or at least that his mood will improve because his recent disposition has reminded you of the early days when you first started organizing the lab. And, the truth is, that that worries and saddens you. It almost sends little alarms to your head about the possibility of maybe… Losing him.
You shake your head, trying to get rid of those thoughts. You don’t want to think about that possibility. The possibility of him taking a step back and deciding to shut everyone out again.
Including you.
But surely, that’s not it. Right?
You’ve thought about it the last few days. Did you do or said something that made him upset? Is there a chance that you did and he doesn’t want to bring it up to avoid hurting your feelings? You even wonder if maybe he’s… In need of space from you. Maybe having you around too much has become stressful, even suffocating. You debate that specifically, having no other explanation for his current behavior.
You’ve both tried to give each other space while at the penthouse, so it’s not like you spend every hour together in the evenings. During the days, you’re off doing other things either at HQ or at your universe. Yet, you still wonder if you being in his personal space, in his home, has become too much for him. Maybe you’ve pushed his boundaries, those you always try to respect, without even realizing it.
With a frown and a bad feeling in your chest, one you’ve carried with you over the last few days, you continue to work wordlessly until you’re done. You decide to leave the lab afterwards and give Miguel space, thinking maybe he truly needs a break from you.
The rest of the day goes by in a blur. Miguel stays a few more hours at HQ than he usually does these days. When he gets home, he reheats his own dinner, even though you offer to do it for him, a gesture he politely declines. In previous days, you talked with him for a bit. You’ve told him about your day, back in your universe when you’re off to do patrols, which you’ve continued to do. Just because you’re living in Miguel’s universe for the moment, doesn’t mean you’ve abandoned your dimension nor left your city defenseless.
You know you have Miguel’s technology to help connect with your two-way radio in case of emergencies, but even then, you like to do patrols. It was your promise to Peter, your Peter, after all. To keep your city safe, so you do.
You patrol your city, witnessing all sorts of things. One thing you’ve definitely learned from being Spider-Woman is that people do strange, funny, and sometimes even wholesome things when they believe no one is watching. If only they knew Spider-Woman is often watching from some rooftop.
It’s these stories you’ve told Miguel, in hopes of bringing some light to those sad eyes. You’ve succeeded but only during those short moments of time.
Whatever is on his mind takes the happiness out of them and his heart.
Today, instead of talking to him, you opt to remain silent as you clean the kitchen to at least give him company. Not long after, he excuses himself after washing his dishes, heading to his bedroom. Once you’re done cleaning the kitchen, you decide to lounge in your room, or Gabriel’s rather.
The penthouse is, once more, silent this evening, and for the first time, you feel an emptiness from it.
With a sigh, you stare out the window. The sight of the sun setting reminds you of Father’s Day and how you both sat on the rooftop that evening, enjoying the view before the sun dipped below the horizon, giving you a memory you’ll forever remember.
You touch your elbow, recalling how you ended up hurting yourself that evening in an attempt to hide the gifts you got for Miguel. Of course, it’s healed now like other injuries have in the past regardless of how big or small, physical or emotional.
Time heals all.
Usually.
You turn towards the closet where you hit yourself that day. Before you know it, you’ve opened the door and stare at the top of it. Your eyes find Peter’s box with all of his belongings, the same one you haven’t opened since you packed it.
And today is still not that day.
You close the door again and lean back on it, the sunset filtering through the window. Silently, you wonder if Miguel is watching it, too, from his own room.
You almost wish you could send him a message, but that would be insensitive and inappropriate when he’s in such a mood.
Are you watching the sunset, too?
You scoff to yourself. Yeah, not the best time.
Isn’t it beautiful? The colors - that shade of red.
It reminds you of Miguel’s eyes.
Shaking your head at your random thought, you sit down on the chair within your room and stare at the sunset some more. You remain like that until the sun fully disappears, still thinking about him and wishing you knew what is bothering him.
It’s a few minutes after the sun sets that you stand up and do a little organizing around your room. You know you’re only trying to distract yourself from Miguel but you accept the distraction happily. It’s the only way you can stop thinking about him and wondering what’s going on, analyzing your actions and words from the last few days before his mood changed. Your organizing halts half an hour later when you hear Miguel’s bedroom door open.
You frown, knowing you’re only able to hear it because he wants you to. He always goes out of his way to make as little noise as possible in case you’re taking a nap or simply to avoid disrupting you.
You don’t hear his footsteps however. You hardly do. For a man his size, you’d think you’d hear them, but no. He’s so silent.
For a moment, you wonder if he even left his room. You foolishly hope that he’s opened the door to give you a sign, one that means he’s better and ready to interact, but your hopes are shattered when you receive the notification from your gizmo.
“I’m at the gym.” - M
A part of you wants to change into workout clothes and go to the gym just to be near him, even if you keep your distance, but no.
You recognize when someone wants space - when someone wishes to be alone.
Miguel wants that now, so, you stay put in the penthouse instead, though you can’t find it in yourself to do something relaxing such as reading a book, or watching a movie or show. You don’t engage with any of your hobbies, old or new. Instead, you slip on headphones and do chores like laundry and vacuuming the living room’s rug. You wipe the ceiling to floor windows of both the living and dining area rooms, needing no ladder thanks to your spider abilities as you listen to music.
You go through an entire album, marking an hour. You play another one, focusing on other chores like drying the dishes and placing them back where they go. You adjust the couches and fix your blanket. You dust the bookcases and Miguel’s new photographs before you sweep the living room, using some advanced broom despite having robot vacuums to take care of it.
Back at the kitchen, you wipe the counters once more and then sweep that area, too. You even venture to the other living room, the one that’s for entertaining guests, and repeat the process all over again.
You keep listening to music, the hours tick by. It’s eventually eleven and Miguel is still at the gym. You only know he’s still there because Lyla tells you so. After all the chores and restlessness, you take a shower before going to bed at last, even though you simply lay there, staring at the ceiling - alone in the penthouse.
You grow restless staring at the four walls, so you eventually get up and leave your room. You stand in the hallway of the second floor, noticing the silence and darkness. It brings a thought to mind, but one you immediately push away.
After standing there for a few minutes, you finally head downstairs. Your steps are the only sound as you reach the living room where one single lamp remains on, one that you left on for Miguel for when he comes home. You also left small lamps on in the other living room and another one in the kitchen so he can see where he’s going when he comes back.
It’s past midnight when you turn to the windows and stare out at Nueva York. You bring your hands to your arms, hugging yourself with a deep sigh.
Is Miguel even coming back to the penthouse tonight? Or, will he stay at the gym all night?
Minutes tick by as you keep your gaze on the city, waiting.
You wait, and wait. And wait.
“Lyla?” you break the silence several minutes later.
“Yeah?” Lyla appears next to you, her voice gentle to avoid startling you.
“Can you please turn off all the lights?”
At that, Lyla turns to you, a frown on her face as she processes the odd request. “Turn off the lights? Why?”
“Please,” you whisper, still hugging yourself and staring out the windows.
Despite her confusion and the urge to question and deny your request, Lyla does as you’ve asked. She turns off every single light, leaving the penthouse in utter darkness, save for some spaces that are somewhat illuminated by the outside.
You turn away from the windows and stare at the living room and the rest of the penthouse. Everything is dark. And you’re alone.
Your thought from earlier comes back as you take in your surroundings.
This is what it’s like for Miguel - what it was like back then when he lost Gabriella. All alone, sitting in darkness and silence with so many running emotions all on his own.
“This is what it was like,” you whisper.
“What was what like?” Lyla asks, still hovering near you.
“Miguel. After everything that happened with Gabriella.”
Lyla nods, now understanding what’s going on, recalling those nights. “Yes, this is what the penthouse looked and felt like on those nights - and there was something heavy that lingered in the space. I don’t like to think about those nights.”
“I understand,” you whisper, imagining what Lyla has shared.
She nods, still staring at the darkness. A frown is visible on her face. It bothers her to see you like this. “I’m turning the lights on.”
“Is Miguel still at the gym?”
“Yeah. He’s been working out, almost nonstop for hours.”
You nod. He’s been trying to distract himself with that. From what? You don’t know.
”Lyla?”
“Yes?”
“… I know I shouldn’t ask…”
“You want to know what’s happening.”
“Yes.”
Lyla sighs, or replicates doing so anyway as you turn to face her at last, still hugging yourself. She sits down and adjusts her heart shape glasses. “I’m honestly surprised Miguel hasn’t told you, but I suppose he still has some healing to do despite all the progress he’s done in the last year,” she says, staring at you. “I guess it’s why he still finds it hard to talk about her.”
Her.
“Gabriella. It’s about Gabby,” you state.
“Yes. Tomorrow…” Lyla sighs again. “Tomorrow, or well, I guess today, considering the time now, would’ve been… her birthday.”
Suddenly everything clicks into place.
Lyla watches the way your shoulders slump, the realization hitting you, and how your entire face changes to one of understanding and pain.
“Miguel,” you sigh, understanding everything now. No wonder he’s been so different lately, he’s been thinking about Gabby’s upcoming birthday for days. Probably thinking about what age she’d be turning today. Now more than earlier, you feel like going to look for him, to comfort him somehow, to be near him to offer at least your presence, but you’re reminded that Miguel doesn’t want that. At least, you don’t believe so. If he did, he’d be here in the penthouse, not at the gym alone.
“You should get some rest,” Lyla suggests. “I know that’s probably the last thing you want to do now but… Miguel would feel far more guilty if he knows he’s been keeping you up. I’m certain he already feels upset with himself for how different he’s been the last few days.”
“I don’t think I can sleep, but I know I can’t go and look for him,” you reply.
“No, that would upset him even more. He doesn’t like disturbing you, or rather worrying you.”
“Right,” you respond, even though you wish to run and find him right now. “I’ll be in my room. Please make sure those lights remain on. I don’t want him to come back to…”
“Darkness.”
You nod.
“The lights will remain on, no worries,” she reassures you. “Try to sleep a bit. I’ll keep an eye out for him, too. If something comes up, I’ll wake you up.”
Lyla “walks” you to your room, feeling the need to look after you. You’re after all, her boss’s best friend. Looking after you is her looking after Miguel, one of her integral designs.
You settle down on the bed, covering your body with the bed sheets, your mind running wild with thoughts. Lyla wishes you a good night after several minutes of her simply hanging out around the room, knowing you’re not much for conversation now that you know the reason for Miguel’s current behavior, before she flickers away.
Alone, you’re back to staring at the ceiling and the walls in an empty penthouse. It’s close to two in the morning when you hear subtle footsteps. They slow down in front of your bedroom, stopping by the door.
For a moment, you wonder if Miguel will come in, deciding to talk to you, even if he thinks he’ll have to wake you up. Instead, you hear a soft sigh before the footsteps continue, fading once Miguel enters his bedroom.
You’re not sure if Miguel gets any sleep, even though you’re tempted to ask Lyla. A part of you refuses to continue invading his privacy by having Lyla tell you what he’s up to, so you don’t. You stay up for a while, staring at the walls, tossing and turning. You eventually doze off despite wanting to remain awake, waking up at six only to be told by Lyla that Miguel has already been at HQ for an hour.
Tired, you start the day knowing what today is.
Gabby’s birthday.
As you move about the penthouse, you wonder how old she would’ve turned today. The few images you have of her pop into your mind along with the few videos Miguel has of her - almost like a movie, and one too short, like her life.
You ask Lyla what Miguel has done. Apparently, he’s been working on data since he showed up.
Downstairs, you find a sticky note on the counter. Ever since you began living with him, you started the habit of leaving him sticky notes around the place, something Miguel has begun to reciprocate. Like the previous day, he’s left you another one today.
I’m at HQ. - Miguel
You make yourself a coffee and gulp it down in a few drinks, needing the caffeine. You debate doing your morning patrol, but eventually decide to do it anyway, thinking it’ll give you time to think. Swinging around your city and watching from rooftops on your own, you question whether you should talk to Miguel, let him know that you’re aware of what today is, but you quickly change your mind.
You imagine Miguel might not be pleased to know that Lyla told you, so you decide not to say anything, at least for now. You’ll have to pretend that you don’t know the reason he’s hurting.
Back at HQ, you walk around the building and check on things, trying to distract yourself. It’s nine in the morning when you decide to grab some breakfast from the cafeteria for both Miguel and you. You’re unsure of what the day or Miguel will be like when it’s Gabby’s birthday, but you definitely know that you want to look after him, even if it’s only by making sure he’s eating properly.
With breakfast in your hands, you begin to head to the lab with hope. You’ve only taken about twenty steps when you receive a notification through your gizmo from Jess, which you quickly realize was sent to everyone.
“For all questions or concerns, direct yourself with me. Miguel is busy. Do not disturb him.” - Jess
Lowering your arm, you wonder if that message applies to you, too.
Standing in the middle of a corridor, hands occupied with food, it suddenly feels a lot like the time you entered Miguel’s lab and found him overwhelmed, upset, but more than anything, hurt at the discovery of hidden photos and videos of Gabby and his wife by Lyla. You recall the way it felt to have stepped into the lab and you wonder now if that’s what awaits for you because you quickly make up your mind.
You’re ignoring Jess’s message.
Two years ago, you would've simply oblige and made no questions. You would’ve try not to think about your boss and wonder what he did all day, wondered if anyone dropped off food for him, or if he even left the lab in his own discrete ways to eat and drink something, to nourish his body. You would've hoped that he'd at least let either Jess or Peter B. check on him.
Two years ago, you wouldn't had done it yourself nor pushed his boundaries because you were a simple member, not one of his close ones.
Two years ago, that would’ve been the end of it, even if you silently worried about Miguel from a distance.
Today? Things are different.
Two years ago Miguel and you hardly talked, hardly interacted.
Now, you're best friends, and best friends don't leave each other alone. They don't give up on you. They keep trying just like Miguel said Harry and your other former friends from a lifetime ago should’ve with you.
With a determined nod, you continue to make your way to Miguel's lab. As usual, there's other spider members walking around. You catch a few checking their gizmos, making you wonder if they’re reading Jess’s message regarding Miguel. You nod at a few, at least at those you're not too familiar with or who might be new. To those you do know and have more of a bond with, you give them a quick and simple greeting, not opening for conversation, not when you want to see Miguel already.
You turn the corner and it’s only thanks to your spidey senses going off that you don’t run into -
“Ben,” you say, recognizing him instantly.
Ben Reilly's eyebrows shoot up, surprise visible on his face. He shifts slightly. “Y/N… Hey.” He offers a smile, scratching his neck.
“Hey,” you greet him back, returning a small smile even though you're in a rush. “I'll see you around!” you say, walking around him, determined to reach your destination.
“Hey, Y/N!” Ben calls out, turning to face you quickly. “I was wondering if I could talk to you about something…?”
You turn to face him, walking backwards with both your hands occupied with the food and drinks.
“Of course. Can we talk …” you trail off. “Later? I'm in the middle of something. I'm sorry,” you apologize softly.
He sighs subtly, his shoulders slumping just barely before he fixes his excellent posture. “I understand. I'll look for you later today.”
“Alright. That sounds good. I'll see you later, Ben. Careful if you go on missions!” You offer him a quick smile before you turn away once more and hurry off, leaving Ben behind.
He sighs again, running a hand through his hair that earns him a few glances of interest from other spider members. He watches you become smaller and smaller as you retrace steps you take each day.
Everyone knows where you're going and who you're seeking: the one person they were told to not disturb today.
That person’s door is closed to them but not for a few people like Jess Drew, Peter B. Parker, and now you.
He huffs and turns away, heading to the training sector for a workout session to sweat his frustrations away. He turns for one more glance, seeing you disappear into the elevator and heading for Miguel's floor.
You reach the lab doors, wondering if you’ll be turned away. A few seconds later, relief washes over you when Lyla confirms, after asking Miguel, that you can go in.
As far as Miguel knows, you have no idea what today is, so you offer him breakfast, which he thankfully accepts. You both sit on his elevated platform and eat in silence, legs dangling from it. As you eat, you remind yourself that you agreed to saying nothing, to pretend like you don’t know. You stay true to that even though your mind is a mess, even though you want to do more than just offer Miguel food.
However, you say nothing as you eat. Even after breakfast, you reveal nothing. You don’t want Miguel to feel pressured to say anything just because you know, behind his back. No, if he says anything, you hope it’s because Miguel is ready and comfortable doing so.
So, you stick with him for a while, working silently from your own area in the lab now knowing that his behavior has nothing to do with something you may have done or said, or your mere presence as you were worrying about yesterday. At some point you leave him because you’re needed by Jess, so you do so reluctantly.
For lunch time, it’s the same with the small difference that you both make small talk. The hours tick by and when you look at your gizmo, it’s suddenly three in the afternoon. Due to Jess’s warning, no one sends Miguel messages except for Jess, nor does anyone show up to the lab. It’s just Miguel, Lyla, and you.
You yourself get a few messages from the spider gang, asking if Miguel is alright and why you’ve been hiding at his lab all day. You reassure them both Miguel and you are physically alright. You don’t know what else to say. It’s not your place to share something so sensitive and personal, especially when you’re not supposed to even know.
Standing up, you stretch quietly, remembering that Ben Reilly wanted to talk to you. You figure you should make yourself available at least for an hour. He hasn’t sent you any messages, so you wonder if he’s already aware that you’ve been at Miguel’s lab for the majority of the day, hence the reason for the lack of messages from his end. You pack your things silently, shutting the laptop and fixing the area, which catches Miguel’s attention.
On his platform, he turns to look at you. Seeing you pack up makes him realize you’re probably not coming back because if you were, you would be leaving your desk as it was. Watching you push the chair under the desk only solidifies the fact.
“Heading… out?” Miguel asks, starting the conversation for the first time in days.
It catches you by surprise, so much it’s clearly expressed on your face. It immediately pains Miguel, to see how surprised you are that he’s talking to you. His hands close into fists at his sides, cursing mentally.
“… Yes,” you reply, picking up your empty cup. “I’m heading out.”
Miguel nods, his expression neutral but quickly morphing into a pained one.
“Migs…?” you say softly, quickly noticing his expression changing.
“Mierda [shit],” Miguel whispers, looking away and unable to stop himself from thinking he’s undeserving of your nickname. A nickname, or a term of endearment, is a gesture from someone who cares about you, and here he is, hurting you with his behavior. Seeing the surprise look on your face just seconds ago solidifies that. Miguel’s guilt only intensifies as the look on your face flashes in his mind. You don’t hurt those that you care for and care about you, but now he has hurt you to some degree.
“Miguel?” you try again.
“I’m - I’m sorry,” Miguel says, exhaling deeply with a remorseful tone. “I’m … sorry. I didn’t mean to.”
Hearing Miguel say that throws all ideas about leaving out the window. You place the cup down and make your way to him, his head hanging low.
“Miguel,” you say once more, gently.
“I’m sorry,” he repeats, lifting his head enough so you can see his face.
“Don’t,” you say. “Don’t apologize.”
“You deserve an apology,” Miguel replies. “I’ve been - I haven’t been in a good mood… I need to tell you something.”
“You don’t have to, Miguel,” you counter gently.
“I do. You deserve an explanation,” Miguel continues with a sigh, shaking his head in frustration at himself. “I saw the surprise on your face from me talking to you. You shouldn’t be surprised by that, but you are because I’ve been - a jerk.”
You sigh, standing on his platform. “You’re not a jerk, Miguel.” You state firmly. “I… I was wondering what was the matter,” you pause, wanting to be honest. “Don’t be mad at Lyla but… She told me a few hours ago. Some time before you returned to the penthouse this morning from the gym.”
“Lyla,” Miguel says, not even upset. “A part of me is relieved you already know… I should’ve told you sooner, but I couldn’t…” Miguel shakes his head, his eyes closed. He gulps softly. “It’s her birthday,” Miguel whispers, finally sharing from his own lips what has been on his mind all these past few days. ”Today is Gabby’s birthday.”
Nodding, you take a step closer. “I know,” you start. “I know it’s her birthday…” you reply, not knowing what else to say right now. To be honest, you weren’t expecting Miguel to tell you today. “I know it must be hard to share that,” you add softly.
Miguel sighs gently, nodding. “May I be honest?”
“Yeah, of course,” you whisper.
“I don’t want to be here right now.”
Your eyebrows furrow and you’re filled with worry instantly, for a second thinking that Miguel means something else, something much sadder, darker.
“I want to be home,” he goes on, clarifying. “I don’t want to be here, trying to distract myself from my thoughts about her.”
You sigh in relief, nodding. “We can go home, if you want?”
Miguel nods, wanting now more than ever to leave his lab. “Lyla, please let Jess know I’m going home,” Miguel says before correcting himself. “Let her know we’re both going home, dulzura and me.”
-♡-
Back at home, Miguel takes a shower while you begin to prepare an early dinner. You know that there’s essentially nothing in the whole multiverse that can lessen Miguel’s hurt today, but you hope that a homemade meal will sooth his heart just a little.
When he comes back downstairs, showered and dressed in lounging clothes, you fix him a plate before joining him. He doesn’t say anything else about Gabby, which you respect. You’re grateful he’s at least told you about Gabby’s birthday and that you’re both home eating together instead of him staying after hours at HQ before coming home and hiding at the gym.
Even after dinner and cleaning the kitchen, you’re unsure of what to do. You search for silent cues from Miguel. Does he want to be alone or is he okay with you being near him? You receive your answer when Miguel asks if you want to watch TV together, a question that leaves you a little surprised to start with, but one you answer with a “yes.”
You sit together in the living room. As always, you’re both on your respective couches.
Miguel watches the TV, or tries to. His attention is not fully on it for obvious reasons. Gabby is always on his mind, along with Gabriel, but due to her birthday coming up, she’s been even more so. He’s been thinking about it for days, about his little girl and how old she’d be turning today. It pains him so much, knowing she’s not here. He’s been trying to distract himself with work at HQ and then working out at the gym, going for hours so he doesn’t think about the fact that Gabby isn’t here - that she won’t be celebrating her birthday like she should.
He turns his head to look at the windows, the sun setting now. He’s reminded of yesterday when he was in his room after dinner. He found himself watching the sunset from there and in that short amount of time while the sun dipped, he thought about you. He heard you entering your room shortly after him and he wondered if you were watching it, too. He typed the message but before sending it, he changed his mind.
Miguel turns to look at you now, sitting on the couch, keeping him company. His guilt washes over him again at the sight. You denied it earlier but he’s such a jerk for the way he’s been behaving, there’s no way to deny it, at least not in his eyes.
He sighs. He promised he was going to try, didn’t he? He promised for Gabby and Gabriel. He was going to try to heal, to move forward.
It’s that thought that compels Miguel to stand up from the couch, telling you that he’d be back before heading upstairs.
You simply nod and stay in place, hoping Miguel truly does come back. To your relief, Miguel returns a few minutes later, holding a guitar.
You recognize it instantly from Miguel’s ofrenda [altar] for Día de los Muertos [Day of the Dead] as Miguel approaches you, who then takes a seat on the ground next to you. You join him a few seconds later without a doubt, watching him hold the guitar carefully.
“It’s the only thing… The only physical reminder I have left of Gabby. It was pure… Coincidence that I still have it,” Miguel shares, staring at the guitar. “A day before her universe collapsed, she asked me to fix the strings for her, so I brought it to HQ to work on it. Unfortunately, there were a lot of things happening that day. It was one thing or another. Every time I lifted it to begin working on it, something or someone would pop up and prevent me from doing so. I ended up forgetting it at HQ that day. With so much happening, I left it in my lab. It was much later when I remembered it. That last night. When I got back to her universe just in time for school to be out, she didn’t ask for it. She was so tired from the school day, she didn’t remember it. Not even later in the afternoon when she was done with school work and was free to do what she wanted, whether that was coloring, or playing with her toys, or practicing the guitar. It was me who remembered it when I tucked her in for the night.”
Miguel brushes his fingers over the strings, gently. “I told myself I’d fix the guitar as soon as I got to the lab, so I could take it back to her… So I could hear her play it in the afternoon the next day.” He shakes his head in disbelief. “I had no idea that would be the last night… ever.”
Miguel doesn’t know why, but suddenly he feels like talking about that last night. He’s shared with you the last morning he spent with Gabby, just hours before one of the worst moments of his life took place.
“I used to think… After losing Gabriel, that nothing could ever hurt me as much. That there was nothing much worse that could happen to me. Nothing could ever, make me feel so much sorrow, grief, pain - and I was wrong. I never thought that I’d become a dad,” Miguel states, looking over the guitar, at the stickers that Gabby placed on it. “I never thought that I’d experience that, much less the loss of a child. I think - I know - a part of me always believed I was unworthy of such thing. I wasn’t meant for that life. Wasn’t meant to experience it. I was destined to be alone,” he continues. “And then she happened, and she - she was and continues to be one of the most beautiful things I’ve had the privilege of experiencing.”
Miguel shifts slightly, knowing you’re listening to him, like always.
“That last night, my wife and I cooked dinner. It was a normal evening, like any other. Gabby did her homework, got to play with her dolls afterwards. She had a lot, you know, but her favorites were the doctor and scientist dolls. Part of it was because they looked like her, and another part because of their professions.” Miguel smiles slightly, a sad smile. “In the short time I had with her, I always told her so. How they were mini versions of her in the future because she was so bright, so smart. I’d always tell her that she could do and be anything she wanted. I never once dampened her dreams nor her aspirations. I wanted her to know that she could be a scientist, or she could be a teacher, or she could be a bakery owner. It didn’t matter. As long as she wanted it and worked towards it, she could achieve anything, but I digress,” Miguel says, realizing he’s all over the place.
“She played with her dolls and showered afterwards. I arranged her school stuff for the morning. I always helped her prep her outfit the night before to save time in the morning, and made sure her backpack was set with her assistance to help her build responsibility, too, though I never struggled with that. She was so responsible for her age. She watched some TV that evening, and then, it was time for bed. I never missed bedtime,” Miguel continues, a fond smile on his face, his fingers splayed over the guitar.
“I loved tucking her in, reading to her. I’d climb into the bed to read to her sometimes. It was always a struggle, of course, and my back would be tense in the mornings, but it was worth it. So worth it. What I’d give… to repeat those moments. To be back in that cheerful bedroom and have her ask questions while seeking the comfort of her father… of her daddy.” Miguel sighs, thinking about that. How his heart would swell with a pure happiness unlike any other when she called him “dad” or “daddy.”
“I read to her that night and soon, she was drifting off. Sus ojitos [her little eyes; little is used as endearment, not meaning she had small eyes]… Her little eyes would flutter, trying to fight off the sleep to keep talking about the book. She’d blink real hard,” Miguel says with a soft chuckle, inhaling deeply and shakily. “Thinking it’d help her stay awake longer, but my little girl, she eventually doze off into a peaceful slumber with no worries. I was grateful for that, you know?” Miguel says turning to look at you. “There is no doubt in my mind that the original Miguel of that dimension was grateful for that, too. Gabby didn’t know what it was like to be ripped away from a peaceful dream because of your parents’ arguing in the living room. Nor did she have to worry about a younger sibling coming to her room to seek her comfort. I was always grateful that Miguel, the original of that dimension, had succeeded in providing such a safe space for her. And I was set on doing the same for her. I succeeded, too. So… she dozed off. I held her close,” Miguel whispers, recalling how it felt to hold his sleeping daughter in his arms.
“I remember thinking, ‘just a few more minutes. One day she’ll be all grown up, she may not want her dad’s affection anymore because she finds it embarrassing or uncool.’ So, I did. I stayed there with her. Now I wonder, if something deep inside me felt the danger coming. If I had sensed it somehow and I wanted to hold on to that moment - to her - just a little longer because something in me knew... knew that that would be the very last time I’d ever get to hold her like that, in such calm manner because the next day would be the very last time I held her, but under much different circumstances. That it’d be outside the comfort of her home with hundreds of frightened people running around us, seeking a safety that I couldn’t give to them because I didn’t understand what was happening.”
“Miguel,” you whisper gently, knowing to this day he blames himself for the collapse of Gabriella’s universe despite there being no evidence of such thing.
“I know,” he whispers back. “You’re too kind to me, so you don’t think I had something to do with it, but… my brain tells me so.”
“We still don’t know, you know that. There’s no evidence that suggests you did. Just because you were there, doesn’t mean you were responsible. It doesn’t make sense when so many of us have done the same, and yet those universes are still… here.” You inhale softly, hating the fact that Miguel still blames himself. You know it’s something that will take him time to let go, maybe until there’s further evidence that suggests otherwise. In Miguel’s mind, it’s not ‘innocent until proven guilty.’
It’s guilty until proven innocent.
“It probably doesn’t mean anything,” you start. “Because I know how these feelings can be rooted deep in us, despite any comforting words… but I don’t think you had anything to do with it, Miguel.”
He looks at you then, the pain in his eyes visible. “But what if it was me? I took everything from her. If I had stayed away - her universe might still be intact. She would be alive. She’d be celebrating today like she ought to,” Miguel says with desperation in his tone. “I ruined it. I should’ve never gone. I should’ve let things carry on like they were supposed to,” he insists.
“Miguel,” you say his name again but this time not in a whisper. You speak firmly, evenly. You almost lift your hand to place it on his shoulder but you remember not to. “I’m not saying that only because you’re my best friend,” you continue. “I wholeheartedly believe that you weren’t the cause. You’re not responsible for it. There’s something we’ve overlooked, the real cause. I have no doubt one day we’ll discover it, and it’ll show you that you were not at fault.”
“But what if I was?” he repeats. “She could’ve been alive today.”
“I’ve told you I don’t believe you are responsible. You know that, Miguel, but maybe there’s a chance she might have still been alive, if it wasn’t for the true cause of her universe’s collapse.” Next to you, Miguel huffs in frustration, as if he’s upset at your relentless faith that he had nothing to do with it. It frustrates you, the fact that he thinks you’re just trying to sooth his guilt. “Do you think it’s my fault Peter… passed away?”
That makes Miguel turn before he lowers the guitar to his lap. “What - no, of course not, dulzura. It wasn’t your fault,” he says, brows furrowed.
“Are you only saying that to make me feel better? Because we’re best friends?”
“Dulzura… No, of course not. It wasn’t your fault, and I mean that.”
“Then, can you believe that when I tell you that I don’t think you are responsible, I don’t say it only to make you feel better? Can you believe that I say it because I really do believe it?” you ask, holding his gaze with such a serious face that leaves no room for doubt or questioning.
Miguel blinks, keeping his gaze on you for several seconds. His gaze searches your face, so serious. He silently decides he doesn’t like such look on you - he prefers to see you smile, prefers the brightness in your eyes when you’re happy, when you’re in good spirits, but that serious face… Miguel sees you truly believe what you’re saying. You’re not only saying it to make him feel better, to reassure him, and lessen his guilt and pain. At last, he nods slowly.
“I can… a part of me can, but another part of me still feels an incredible guilt that I swear will never fade, no matter how much time passes,” he states softly. “I think about what she could’ve had, where she could’ve been. What she’d be in the future, the amazing things she could’ve done, and experienced.”
You sigh softly and nod. With deceased loved ones, there’s always those questions, especially when they pass away too soon, when there was so much for them to live and experience. You yourself have thought about Peter and all the things he never had the opportunity to experience nor accomplish. Then, there’s also the things that he didn’t even get a chance to wish for, or dream about. By now, he may have accomplished all his previous goals and dreams, and he might have been on to newer ones, but you’ll never know now. Still, you know that for however long he was alive, he lived a good life despite the few tragedies he experienced early on in life. He was a happy man, and he loved and was loved deeply.
“I know it’s a different age with Peter. He had the opportunity to live more but… That always hurt me to think about, too,” you admit. “About all the goals and dreams he had, about the ones he didn’t even get to think of.” You pause, looking at your hand for a few seconds. “A wise man once said, that seven years count the same as seventy, even seven hundred.” Looking up again, you find Miguel’s crimson eyes on the same hand you were just staring at before he lifts his gaze to yours. He raises an eyebrow, wondering, so you continue.
“Someone may live to ninety years and we think, ‘Wow. They’re so lucky.’ We imagine they lived and experienced so much, but that’s not always the case. Someone who only got to live nine or twenty-three years old may have lived more than the ninety year old person has. Just because we’ve had more years to live doesn’t mean we’ve actually lived, not for all of them,” you say softly, looking away. “I didn’t live for many years. I stopped when I lost Peter.”
Hearing you say that breaks Miguel’s heart, brings him so much pain.
“It’s probably… stupid and maybe even cringe,” you say with a smile and shrug, which for some reason pains Miguel even more. “My heart functioned, and I was alive, but I didn’t feel like it. I didn’t actually live over that time. And I didn’t even realize until much later, when I joined the Spider Society, how dull I had truly become. There’s still moments, even now, when I realize that all over again. Like, when I look at sunsets and realize I looked at sunsets during those times but I wasn’t really looking at them… if that makes sense. It was as if I was looking through a screen, someone else’s life. And then, I started to learn to live again. So… I’m sure you know where I’m getting at with this,” you say, looking at him again, at last.
“Gabby may have only lived for nine years but every single one of them counted as living. Her biological father, from what you’ve shared, loved her so much and gave her a safe and comfortable life with so much love, which you continue when you stepped up to be her dad. In her nine years of life… She knew and most importantly, felt, the important things. Unconditional love. Comfort. Happiness. Safety. That’s more than some ninety, or even forty year old have ever experienced despite being alive for several decades… because they haven’t lived. I wish Peter… Gabby, Gabriel - were here now. That they were able to still be here and live longer. That wish will never fade, not truly, I don’t think, but personally?” You offer Miguel a smile. “I’m thankful Peter knew and felt all those things - that he was able to experience them when so many don’t.”
With that, you look away and lean back on the couch, allowing Miguel to either absorb your words, or reject them.
“She was loved,” Miguel states almost a minute later of silence. “She was so loved. By both her biological dad, and then me. I’m grateful for that,” he whispers. “I’m grateful she knew love, kindness. That she knew happiness, comfort, and safety. Like every child should.” Whispering that, Miguel sighs. His head lowers to look at the guitar, his mind flooded with memories of Gabby being happy. He can’t help but feel a new wave of guilt at the fact that on a day that she’d be very happy on, he’s feeling this way.
Like a bolt of lightning, he’s reminded of Gabriel suddenly, of his words, to be exact, from his dream a year ago. He asked Miguel to live for them. Then, there’s also your words from a few weeks ago when you witnessed one of his nightmares for the first time. You said to honor them - to live how they would live if they were here.
Thinking about that, Miguel clears his throat. “You always bake a cake for Peter on his birthday.”
“I do,” you reply, looking over at him with curiosity. You didn’t expect the sudden change of conversation.
“You do it because that’s what you would’ve done if he was still around.”
“Yes.”
Miguel nods, thinking. He’s never bought or baked a cake for Gabriel or his mother. He’s never celebrated their birthdays after they passed away. That includes Gabriella.
He looks down at his gizmo. It’s not too late… Surely a bakery is still open. Maybe they still have cakes.
“Miguel?” you ask softly, noticing him looking at his gizmo.
“I… I think I want to buy her a cake,” he says looking up at you.
“You… do?”
Miguel nods, rapidly realizing he really wants to do this. “Yes. I want to. She deserves it.” He places the guitar on the coffee table and begins to stand up. “I’m going to check the bakeries and see if I can find a cake she’d like. Maybe I’ll have luck.”
Noticing Miguel begin to stand up, you stand up, too, and before you can stop yourself, you make an offer. “I can bake her one, if you want.”
Miguel freezes, looking at you. “You?… Really?” he asks, his entire face softening and lighting up. His tone is gentle, filled with awe and wonder, as if you’ve just made him the greatest offer in history.
With a nod, you smile and reply. “Yes, really. We can bake one together, if you want to help. You know I love baking, so I have almost anything I could need to bake a cake. Just say the word, Migs,” you answer softly.
The nickname, your smile, and offer brings a smile to Miguel’s face. He nods slowly, standing completely now. “Si, por favor [yes, please]. That would mean so much to me… and Gabby.”
You gesture to the kitchen. “C’mon.”
Miguel follows after you, carrying Gabby’s guitar, so precious to him.
You set the oven to preheat, already knowing how to use it since you’ve baked a lot at the penthouse since you’ve lived here. You have Miguel decide the shape, so you find the round cake mold when he politely requests a round one. He retrieves the mixer and the few ingredients he knows will be used, letting you tell him what else is needed so he can help.
As you stated, you have a little of everything so you give him plenty of options for the type of bread, filling, and icing.
Miguel quickly decides the filling should be out of strawberries since Gabby loved them, apparently they were her favorite fruit. For the actual bread, he decides to go with chocolate - it was also a favorite of little Gabby.
Once that’s settled, you begin working with the help of Miguel though your years of baking do not require it. You let him though because you know it’s special to him. It’s for his little girl, after all. So you let him pour the ingredients into the mixing bowl while you work on other things towards the cake.
The more you move through the process together, the more Miguel slowly begins to tell you about Gabby. It’s as if his mind is flooded with random little memories all fighting for his attention. You listen intently to every word, smiling and chuckling with him when he tells you something funny she did or said once.
He’s already shared some of the moments he talks about, but you still listen to him, noticing the glimmer of happiness in his eyes while talking about his Gabby.
As you bake and Miguel shares with you all these moments, you picture them in your head. You see Miguel carrying Gabby on his shoulders, her toothy smile on display. You see Gabby giggling when Miguel accidentally let go of the hair tie and it snapped against his finger while doing her hair. There’s Miguel making Gabby Choco Milk in her favorite cup, and the one time Gabby asked where babies came from out of nowhere, which Miguel didn’t know how to answer in the moment, so he told her he’d find that out and let her know later on.
“What about music?” you ask softly when you pull the pan out of the oven a while later. “What did she like? You’ve mentioned her favorite song before… ‘Luna de Xelajú’, but what else did she like?”
Miguel smiles softly at the fact that you remember her favorite song. “That was her favorite song, yes. She liked other songs, of course. Different genres and artists of all ages. She even liked Joan Sebastian,” Miguel says amused. “She sang some of his songs like she understood matters of the heart already. Then, there were some that always made her dance, like this song called ‘No rompas mi corazón’ - there’s a dance for it. It’s played at parties sometimes,” Miguel shares, not sure if you’re familiar with it.
“It’s something like this,” Lyla says popping out of nowhere, showing you a video of people dancing at a party.
“I know of it,” you say with a smile, not surprised that Lyla has made an appearance. She tends to pop up sometimes out of nowhere when both Miguel and you least expect her. “So Gabby danced to it?”
“Yeah, she’d hear it and it’s like her feet were tingling to move. She’d get so excited every time it came on,” he says with a smile. “She’d dance and look at me and say ‘¡mira, mira, papá! [look, look, papa]’… But there was one artist she absolutely adored, her favorite artist. Selena.”
“Selena?” you ask, surprised. Of course you know of her. “A version of her existed in Gabby’s universe?”
“Yes, but unlike in so many universes where her life is cut short, this version peacefully passed away before Gabby was born out of old age. She had a large and happy family. Gabby told me so,” Miguel says. “She knew a lot about her.”
“What was her favorite song of hers?”
Miguel smiles. “It was ‘Baila Esta Cumbia’ - she’d dance to it, too.”
“Do you want me to… play it?” Lyla asks Miguel while you work on the cake, wondering what his answer will be. It might be too soon for him.
Miguel stays silent for several seconds, thinking. It’s been so long since he’s heard the song, or any of the music that Gabby used to enjoy listening.
“Lyla can always turn it off,” you offer softly as you work, glancing at him for a few seconds before continuing to work on the cake. “If you decide to.”
He hums softly at your words, drumming his fingers against his thigh. At last, he nods to Lyla and a few seconds later, the upbeat song begins to play, filling the kitchen and lifting the mood.
Miguel watches you work on the cake, his finger tapping against his thigh to the beat, thinking about Gabby.
“If only she were here now,” he mumbles softly. He wonders if she’d still like the song, or if she’d have a new favorite song by Selena, if she’d still even be a fan of Selena to begin with. He wonders, just like he wonders about other things, what her music taste would be like now.
He leans forward, resting his elbows on the counter and interlocking his fingers to press against his forehead, looking at the counter surface for a few seconds before closing his eyes and just listening to the song.
He can pretend for a few seconds that she’s here, that she’s singing happily to the song and doing her little dances. He hears the ‘eh, eh, eh,’ part and recalls how she’d sing that part, clapping her small hands to it.
He uncovers his face, lowering his hands to the counter. “You heard that part? The ‘eh, eh, eh?’ She used to clap along with it,” Miguel shares, smiling softly. “She was always so elated when it played. It cheered her up.”
Miguel makes it without crying for the rest of the song, so Lyla deems it safe to play other songs she thinks are appropriate for what could’ve been Gabby’s birthday party. She keeps it light with the music as you work on the cake while Miguel shares other tidbits of Gabby.
After some time, you add the last candle before turning it around so Miguel can see it, his eyes softening immediately at the finished cake.
“What do you think?” you ask him as his eyes take in every detail about it.
He nods, eyebrows knitted gently before he turns his attention to you, smiling tenderly. “It’s… Beautiful, dulzura,” he states softly, his tone full of sincerity. “It’s so Gabby. She would’ve loved it, I know that. Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he whispers accepting the cake as you hand it to him with a warm smile, happy that Miguel likes the cake.
You find a lighter and reach Miguel’s side, not worried about washing dishes since Miguel got most of them while you were working to help, and even then, neither of you would’ve cared in order to celebrate.
At last, you both look at it, at the completed cake, sitting side by side while music still plays in the background.
Miguel continues to observe it, admiring your work with the details like the little bees and the sprinkle of lilac flowers. He doesn’t fail to notice the color you used to write ‘Happy Birthday, Gabby!!’ with - the color Selena was most known for, that rich purple.
“She…” Miguel starts, his voice soft and quiet, as he thinks about her. About Gabby. “She would’ve loved it.” He whispers, a knot forming in his throat. “Thank you - she would’ve loved it, so much.”
“The bees and her favorite color,” you say. “I thought she might have.”
“She would. She really would,” Miguel replies lifting a hand to his face. He tries to be subtle about it, but from your peripheral vision, you can see the action, the way he wipes at his eye.
You feel tears yourself but for Miguel, you try to stay calm, try to be strong. However, seeing someone you care for so much cry has never made it easy. A few tears pool in your eyes, blurring your vision. Biting your bottom lip because you feel it quivering, you dab at your eyes gently, trying to make the gesture subtle, too.
“Do you want me to…?” you ask raising the lighter.
Miguel turns, sniffling. Noticing the lighter, he nods. “… Please,” he whispers.
Miguel doesn’t need to say anything else. His simple response is all you need, so you lit the candles carefully, watching the cake come to life with their flickering.
You both stare at it, unbeknownst to either of you, imagining the same thing: a Gabriella standing behind the counter, her eyes lit up with happiness, her face illuminated by the gentle glow of the candles. There’s a beautiful, toothy smile on her face as she listens to the people around her sing happy birthday before she gets to make a wish and blow the candles.
You can imagine Miguel taking pictures from the very back to avoid blocking anyone's views due to his height with a happy, warm, and sweet smile on his face to see his little girl turn one year older.
Then, there's Gabby looking at the camera still smiling once she has made her wish, guests cheering and clapping.
And maybe, just to keep up with traditions - Miguel would gently get a little bit of icing on Gabby’s nose with his hand, but remaining alert that no one tries to push his daughter into the cake.
“Están son… las mañanitas [these are… the beloved mornings],” Miguel starts singing, his voice low. “Que cantaba el rey David. Hoy por ser día de tu santo, te las cantamos a ti. Despierta - [That King David sang. Today being your saint’s day (same as birthday), we sing them for you. Wake up -]” Miguel pauses, inhaling sharply. “Mi niña, despierta. Mira que ya amaneció… ya los pajaritos cantan, la luna ya se metió [My little girl, wake up. Look, the sun is up… the little birds sing, the moon is gone]…” he sings softly, trailing off.
The next part of the song carries on, credit to Lyla. She starts playing it from where Miguel left off, Vicente Fernandez's voice filling the kitchen.
You sit by, listening to the music and how Miguel sings a song he's known and sang many times in his childhood for friends and Gabriel, but one he never had the opportunity to sing for Gabby.
Despite wanting to join him, you let Miguel do it on his own, respecting he’d want to do so.
“Con jazmines y flores, este día quiero adornar. Hoy, por ser día de tu santo, te venimos a cantar [With jasmine and flowers, this day I want to decorate. Today, for being your saint’s day, we come to sing],” Miguel finishes at last, his voice just a tad louder than when he first started. He clears his throat, wiping some tears from his eyes.
“Do you want to sing ‘Happy Birthday,’ too?” you ask gently.
“… Yeah, would you…?” he asks taking a moment to swallow. “Join me?”
Of course, you nod. How could you ever decline Miguel when it comes to his daughter? Never.
And so, the two of you sing to Gabby.
”Cha, cha, cha” Miguel adds at the end. He turns to face you, his cheeks dusted with redness. “We always did that in the family at the end. Right before the ‘queremos pastel’ and ‘que lo parta’ - Gabriel used to love that when he was little [we want cake; cut it (referring to the cake)],” Miguel shares a fond smile on his face, his eyes misty with tears before turning to look at the cake again.
By this point, the birthday girl should’ve made her wish and blown the candles. He swallows harshly, realizing. Someone needs to blow the candles. He pulls the cake closer to himself, feeling the heat from the candles. He turns to look at you then, a sudden thought popping into his mind.
“I was going to blow the candles… Would you like to do it with me?” Miguel asks softly, his eyes searching your face for any discomfort. He knows he might be asking for too much already. You’ve done so much by baking the cake, by being so thoughtful with the details that he has no doubt Gabby would’ve loved and gushed about.
Now, he’s asking this extra thing from you, asking you to join him in blowing the birthday candles for someone you didn’t have the opportunity to meet, but the way you talk about Gabby and how you look at her pictures on the wall lets Miguel know you care about her as if you had known her personally.
And not just Gabriella, but Gabriel, too. You’ve told him how you wish they were around, so you could’ve met them and known them, something that always makes his heart swell with tenderness and happiness. How he wishes they were around for that, too, to meet you.
Knowing how you feel about two of the most important people in his life, makes Miguel feel a little less worried. Still, he searches your face to make sure he isn’t placing you in an uncomfortable position. However, when he meets your eyes, he finds no discomfort at all.
You nod gently. “If you wish me to.”
“Yes, please. If you’re okay with it,” he replies, still holding your gaze, giving you an option.
“I’m okay with it... In honor of Gabby,” you respond warmly, images of the little girl still flashing in your mind, thinking how much different this would be if she was here.
Miguel might still have tears in his eyes, but they’d be happy ones. Maybe a little bittersweet knowing that his kid is growing older, but he’d be happy because he gets to celebrate his daughter - because he’s a dad and he has family.
You wonder if some spider members, like the spider gang, would’ve been invited to the party, whether it’d be a small or medium size gathering. You wonder what the decorations might be like. Miguel would’ve gone all out, no corners cut to celebrate, no doubt. He would’ve probably blown balloons and stuck decorations on the walls. He would’ve planned the party for weeks, so it would be perfect for Gabby.
He would’ve ordered a cake with plenty of time to make sure there were no problems. If he was unable to pick it up himself, he would’ve sent his most trusted person to pick it up. Probably not Miles after he share the incident with his dad’s cakes when he became captain though.
Maybe it would’ve been Jess if she was available. Or, maybe even Ben Reilly. Maybe his wife if they were still together.
Or maybe, he would’ve asked you if you were still friends in this alternative scenario.
Either way, the cake would’ve been left to someone trustworthy while Miguel got other things completed. There would’ve probably been party hats passed out, the penthouse filled with people. You wonder what Miguel would have ordered for food, or whether he might have cooked it himself because Gabby requested her favorite foods for her birthday.
You think back to Dia de los Muertos [Day of the Dead] and the foods Miguel offered for Gabby’s ofrenda [altar]. Would she had requested some of those foods? You remember she especially loved Miguel’s breakfasts, specifically pancakes with chocolate chips.
Perhaps Miguel would’ve made that for her this morning. He would’ve woken up early, but not to head to HQ. No, the reason why Miguel would’ve woken up early would’ve been to make Gabriella her favorite breakfast, if it was the same to this day, of course. He would’ve cooked for her and then woken her up at an appropriate time, las mañanitas [the birthday song, Mexico’s version] playing thanks to Lyla.
You imagine her waking up, the sleepiness wearing off her face as she realizes it’s her birthday. Perhaps Miguel met her at her bed, giving her a tight bear hug, wondering how it’s possible that his daughter has turned a year older, wondering where time is going, hoping that she doesn’t grow up too soon.
He may have pushed his thoughts away, trying to avoid the bittersweet feelings and focusing on making sure that Gabby’s birthday is perfect, so he’d tell her to come to the kitchen only to surprise her with favorite breakfast, hinting at a special day ahead with the birthday party scheduled for the afternoon. And oh, you know he would’ve left HQ early. Nothing, no mission or anomaly, would’ve prevented him from making it to his daughter’s party.
You sigh softly at the thoughts, the wishes for Miguel and Gabby. How you wish they could’ve had today.
Maybe in another universe, still undiscovered by the Spider Society, a Miguel had the privilege of doing that with another version of Gabby today.
“One… Two…” Miguel counts softly, thinking of what could’ve been today - of all the ways he would’ve made sure today was perfect for his daughter. If only they could’ve had today. If only they could’ve had a full lifetime.
“Three,” you both whisper before leaning forward and blowing the candles.
You both watch as the small trails of smoke rise above the cake, leaning back once more.
“Feliz Cumpleaños, mija [Happy Birthday, my daughter],” Miguel whispers tenderly. “I hope wherever you are… That you’re celebrating with Miguel and your uncle Gabriel. Maybe with your grandmother Conchata, too, if she’s available. Te quiero, y te sigo extrañando. Como siempre [I love you, and I keep missing you. Like always].”
“Happy Birthday, Gabby…” you say gently after gulping a small knot in your throat due to Miguel’s words. “I hope you’re having a lovely day with Gabriel and your other dad. I hope there’s lots of pan dulce [Mexican sweet bread], especially pink conchas [seashell shaped pan dulce], and your favorite Mexican candy.”
Miguel chuckles, ducking his head to wipe the tears from his eyes with the back of his hand.
“Pink conchas and Mexican candy. That would make her day,” he says straightening up, smiling despite the tears. He dries them again, sighing. He turns to look at you, filled with ternura [tenderness]. “Thank you for your sweet words, for agreeing to blow the candles with me, for the cake…” He pauses. “Thank you for everything. I hope you know how much it means to me, how much I appreciate it - thank you, dulzura,” he whispers gently, sincerely.
You smile at him, nodding. “Always, Miguel,” you whisper.
He smiles softly before it fades, his expression turning to an apologetic one. “The last few days…”
“Don’t worry about it,” you reply.
“No, I do,” he states firmly, shifting closer. He turns his body to face you fully, his legs touching your leg closest to him. “I… want to say I’m sorry. I haven’t been… It’s been a few hard days knowing her birthday was coming up, and I… It still hurts,” he says. “It still hurts and instead of talking about it with you, I just - partially shut down, like I used to before… You,” Miguel confesses. “I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable the last few days, making it seem like I didn’t want to be around you. I wanted to but I didn’t want to burden you with all of this.” He sighs. “I didn’t want to cast my rain on you.”
“Cast your rain on me?” you question, tilting your head to the side. “You know that’s… what friends are for.” You give him a reassuring smile. “I understand though… About it hurting and shutting down. It’s okay,” you reassure Miguel. “And you don’t need to apologize. I was worried but… I understand.”
“I do need to apologize,” Miguel insists. “If it was you, I would’ve…” Miguel trails off, scratching his neck. “I would’ve felt that you were pushing me away without a reason. I never want to make you feel like that,” he shares unable to look you in the eyes, so he focuses on the cake again while he speaks. He reads Gabby’s name on it before turning back to you. “I’m sorry, dulzura. I’m still learning.”
“It’s alright, Miguel,” you tell him again. “Should we… cut the cake?”
“You refuse to accept my apology,” he says, brows furrowed.
“Is that necessary?”
“It was a jerk move.”
“I don’t see it that way, but if it makes you feel better, apology accepted,” you reply, flashing him a small smile. “I appreciate your apology, and your willingness to share what’s been going on.”
Miguel nods at that, relieved that you’ve accepted his apology for the way he’s been acting recently.
You nod back, still smiling.“Cake time?”
“Cake time,” Miguel answers with a small smile.
You both turn your attention to the cake again just in time to see two candles sparkling and then flickering back to full life for a few seconds before they go out again, on their own.
With knitted eyebrows, you turn to look at each other, equally surprised by the short moment before turning your attention back to the cake.
As you remain sitting, watching the cake, the mood changes to a significantly lighter one, as if something physically tugged a heavy cloak from your shoulders to relieve them.
For a few seconds, neither of you say anything, basking in the new and light atmosphere that descends on the two of you like falling leaves in autumn.
“I’ll get the knife and plates,” you say breaking the silence after a few seconds.
“I’ll get us drinks and utensils,” Miguel replies before you both gather everything on the counter and prepare to cut the cake.
You hand him the knife so he can do the honors but at the last second he pulls back. “Wait,” he says. “Before I cut it - Lyla?”
“Yes, jefe [boss]?” Lyla says appearing in front of you.
“Can you… Can you take a photo of it?” Miguel asks her.
With a little grin, Lyla nods. “I got you covered. I’ve already taken a few…” she admits. “But I’ll take one more.” With that, she takes one more photo, which she displays for you to see. “What do we think? You outdid yourself, D, by the way.”
“D?” Miguel and you say at the same time.
Lyla turns and smirks. “Well, Miguel gave you ‘Dulzura,' so I figured I could call you D.”
“Oh,” you say, not sure if you’re up for that.
“I don’t think that’s…” Miguel trails off, not liking it himself, but at least Lyla isn’t trying to call you dulzura either. For some reason the idea of someone else calling you that, even if it’s his own AI assistant, rubs him the wrong way, but he doesn’t say that. “I think… Maybe consider something else.“
“Fine. I see neither of you are happy with it. You outdid yourself, Y/N. There. Better?” Lyla says rolling her eyes. “The longer you two spend time together, the more you team up against me. It’s so unfair.”
Miguel and you chuckle.
“And now they’re laughing at me. Humans,” Lyla mumbles under her breath. “Are you cutting the cake or not?”
“Yeah, yeah, we’re cutting the cake,” Miguel says. “Thank you for taking the photo, L.”
“L?” Lyla repeats, offended.
“It’s for Lyla,” you say with a smile, making Miguel smirk softly since you’re following along with his teasing.
“You’re not calling me ‘L’ - I reject that,” Lyla replies, crossing her arms over chest.
“We’ll think of another nickname then,” Miguel replies, positioning the knife to cut the cake at last.
“Finally!” Lyla says. “Queremos pastel [we want cake]!”
“Queremos pastel [we want cake],” Miguel repeats, lowering the knife, imagining for a second that Gabby is the one cutting it, not him. He imagines himself taking photos from the back to capture the moment. “Queremos pastel, pastel, pastel [we want cake, cake, cake].”
You smile, listening to Miguel say ‘we want cake’ as he finally slices it. Lyla and you clap softly, which warms Miguel’s heart.
“Happy Birthday, Gabby!” Lyla says, smiling fondly at the cake. “I wish I could eat cake,” she adds frowning.
“You have no idea what you’re missing out on,” Miguel says with a smile as he cuts two slices, one for each of you.
“You don’t have to rub it in, Miguel,” she replies with a huff as she watches Miguel fix you a plate first, carefully placing it in front of you before fixing his own.
You wait until Miguel has his plate ready and then, you both try the cake at the same time.
You both sigh in content as the flavors melt in your mouth, pleased with it. Of course, there was no doubt in your minds that it was going to be good, especially not in Miguel’s mind. He loves your baking and cooking, but especially your baking since it satisfies his sweet tooth. So he had no doubt your baking was going to be excellent as always.
You both go for a second slice, which you take to the living room for more comfort after storing the remainder of the cake away. Miguel brings Gabby’s guitar along, placing it next to him on the floor. You’ve returned to the same spots from earlier, sitting side by side on the ground.
Lyla disappeared at some point while Miguel served the second slices, unusually quiet as she glanced between you before flickering away, so it’s just the two of you and light music for now as you eat your extra slices of cake.
Finishing with his, Miguel clears his throat and carefully dabs his mouth clean with a napkin. He rests his back on the couch, smiling gently as he watches you bring the fork to your mouth to eat.
“As always, your baking was incredible,” he compliments you. “Thank you for baking it. I believe Gabby would’ve loved it.”
“I’m happy and flattered to hear that,” you reply with a smile.
“She would be - probably giving you a lot of hugs right now.”
That makes you smile brighter, a warm feeling in your chest grows at the simple idea of Gabby loving her birthday cake so much that she’d give you a hug, or multiple.
“I would’ve accepted every single one of them,” you answer, still smiling.
“And returned them,” Miguel adds, knowing you so well. “You would’ve returned every single hug Gabby gave you and then add one or two more.”
“You know me too well,” you say chuckling before you take a sip from your glass. “I would’ve.”
Miguel picks up the guitar, a small smile on his face still. He brushes his fingers against the strings, thinking.
“The last few days were hard, knowing that her birthday was approaching. It’s hard, still,” he says, looking at it. “I didn’t expect for it to hurt less so soon, of course, but it always hurts to think she didn’t turn a year older, even if that would’ve been bittersweet.”
“In a way, I think I know what that would’ve felt like,” Miguel continues, his lips almost pouting. “I watched Gabriel grow older before my own eyes and it always made me feel bittersweet, to see my little brother grow older. I imagine I would’ve felt something similar with Gabby… but it’s not only that that hurts. It hurts that I can’t visit her somewhere. There’s nowhere for me to go. To visit her. I can go and visit my mom and Gabriel, but Gabriella… She’s gone. Really gone. There’s no resting place for her - because there’s no… her,” Miguel whispers, looking at the guitar in his hands.
To think he was the last one to hold her, his arms were the last thing she felt. “I was the last one to hold her. The last thing she felt… were my arms around her. That’s brought me some… comfort over time. She didn’t suffer in her last moments, not physically. I don’t know what I would’ve done if she had.” Miguel’s eyes shut tight, his head lowering. He would’ve hated himself so much more than he does already for not stopping what happened.
After several seconds of silence, he opens his eyes. “But as I was saying… there’s nowhere to see her. Nowhere to offer her flowers. I would visit her every day if there was. I would change her flowers every few days. I would’ve visited today and taken some things for her but there’s nowhere to go.”
You listen intently to Miguel, nodding as he talks. The very same thought has come to your mind before, about how Gabby doesn’t have a resting place, somewhere for Miguel to visit her. You remember thinking about it a while back, imagining how much harder it would be for someone like Miguel to heal from his loss when there’s no resting place for Gabby because her universe collapsed.
“It’s something I think about often, but I can’t do anything about it,” Miguel says playing a few strings.
You hum softly, staying quiet for a few moments and simply watching Miguel as his fingers move over the strings, not playing. “I can imagine, Miguel,” you reply gently after some seconds.
You look over to the wall, your gaze finding the photographs you helped Miguel hang not too long ago. It’s become a special spot for him in the penthouse, a detail that’s given the place a much warmer vibe along with the other changes Miguel has made.
Your eyes move to the console table attached to the same wall, decorated with a simply abstract figure. It’s a spot neither of you have thought about spicing up with Miguel trying to redecorate.
“I know you said there’s nowhere to go… But what if…” you trail off, the idea still forming in your head.
“What if…?” Miguel repeats, wondering what you’re thinking about. He’s both curious and excited to hear whatever is on your mind, something that might give him some comfort regarding the situation.
“What if you give her a place here?” you continue, nodding to the console table. “Her special place for you to visit her per say, close to you, here in your home.”
His eyes light up at the idea.
“Never mind, that’s probably… not a good idea,” you say, doubting yourself, but when you turn to look at Miguel, he’s shaking his head.
“I like it. I like it a lot. In fact… I love it,” he says softly with a little smile. “I spend a lot of time here at the living room, so it’d be nice to set it here. And,” he pauses, standing up and looking around. “This place receives a lot of natural light. She loved the sunshine. Sometimes I think she would’ve loved the living room especially for that reason, the sunshine coming through the windows while she colored on the coffee table,” Miguel continues, a hint of excitement in his voice, as his mind works on how he wants it to look - to honor his little girl, to have a place to visit her in a way as you said. He walks over to you and hands you the guitar. “Hold this, please, while I go get something. I’ll be right back.”
He exits the living room before you can say anything, heading towards the office on the first floor, so you hold the guitar with care knowing how special it is.
This is the first time you’ve held it, so you inspect it a little closer to look at the stickers Gabby put on it. There’s three flowers on it, a DNA strand, and a science symbol which doesn’t surprise you. Miguel has always stated how much Gabby loved science, how bright she was. You smile tenderly at it, allowing yourself to realize it was once held by her, a thought that makes you tear up a little. You think about how this guitar was once held by that little girl with the toothy smile who loved pink conchas, chocolate chip pancakes, arroz con leche [Mexican rice pudding], and Choco Milk. The little girl whose birthday is today, who loved science and candy so much her dad couldn’t say no to her, and who loved bees and the color lilac. The one that played guitar and fútbol [I don’t want to call it soccer], who sometimes fell asleep on the way home after a victorious game.
You turn the guitar over, reading the name on the back.
“Gabriella O’Hara,” you whisper, your fingertips barely touching it. “Gabby.” You sniffle quietly and wipe tears from your eyes, not wanting Miguel to see you crying but then, a tissue comes into your vision.
Startled, you look up and find Miguel, his own eyes teary due to seeing and hearing you cry. Despite his own sadness - his grief - he still finds it in himself to offer you a reassuring, little smile before he carefully dries your tears with the tissue.
“I’m sorry,” you whisper, embarrassed.
“Don’t be,” Miguel whispers back. “Seeing how much you care about Gabby, despite not having the opportunity to meet her, is so touching to me. You have no idea.” He clears his throat and steps back once he’s done. “It means so much to me that you care about her.”
You sniffle again, trying to recover. “I do. If I could do something to bring her back…”
Miguel’s face softens even more.
“I’d give my life so she was here with you,” you say, looking down at the guitar. “So you’d be happy.”
“I would still be hurting,” Miguel says quietly, which makes you look up, frowning.
“Why?” you ask softly, so honestly it leaves Miguel in disbelief for a few seconds.
“Why? You ask why?” he says, his brows raising. “I’d be missing and grieving you, dulzura. That’s why.” He sits near you with a sigh. “So… don’t ever sacrifice yourself,” Miguel says quietly, firmly. “Please.” Just the idea of something happening to you… It leaves more than a bitter taste in Miguel’s mouth. He doesn’t know what he’d do if you were hurt, if something else happened. He doesn’t want to think about it.
You nod slowly, his words sinking in. Without saying it directly, Miguel has stated that he cares about you. It brings a little smile to your face as you hand him the guitar, thinking he’d appreciate holding it again. Your fingers brush his as the guitar is exchanged but neither of you say anything about it.
“But I’m touched you care so much about Gabby - about me - that you’d try to bring her back if there was a way, without you giving your life.” Miguel adds. “To make me not happy, but happi-er because despite everything… I am happy these days, you know.” He turns to look at you, nudging his chin at you.
You smile, guessing he’s talking about you, so you nudge your chin back at him because you’re happier these days thanks to him, too.
He flashes you a small grin, for a second having the urge to gently take your chin between his thumb and finger, an urge that disperses quickly when you change the topic for his and your sake.
“You went to get something. What was it?” you ask.
“Right,” Miguel says, remembering. He reaches from his other side and retrieves a picture frame and a candle. “I want to add another photo of Gabby, a larger one to place on the console table. The candle… I want to light one for her. In Mexico, people sometimes have small altars for their loved ones at home throughout the year, you reminded me of that when you mentioned the console table. Tomorrow, I’ll go and buy her flowers from the flower market. I already have a vase that I think will be perfect. It used to be in my mom’s apartment when she lived in the building.”
“That sounds lovely,” you reply with a smile. “It’s going to look so beautiful. What picture are you thinking of using for the altar?”
Miguel sighs. “Well… All the pictures I have are already on the wall.”
You both turn your gazes to the photographs, your eyes finding Gabby’s few remaining photos.
“So, it’ll have to be one of them,” Miguel continues, to this day still upset that there’s not more photos of Gabby.
You nod, wishing there were more photos and videos of Gabby at least.
Seeing a sudden pop of white to your side, you turn and find Lyla. She gives you a look, as if asking you to wish her good luck before she floats farther away so Miguel can see her, too. The sight of Lyla and her expression, at this moment, has your heart racing suddenly.
“Hey… Miguel?” Lyla starts too quietly, too serious.
“Lyla,” Miguel replies his face changing to confusion, then to one of seriousness as his ears identify the different tone in her voice.
“I have something to tell you… It’s a good thing,” she continues looking at him and then at you.
“What is it?” Miguel asks.
“So… A year ago when you were injured in another universe, you know with the Goblin, the system shut down. It was rebooted by Margo and all was great, but some files were temporarily lost due to the sudden shut down. Others became corrupted. I started working on retrieving those files, slowly but surely. There was no rush as those files weren’t top priority, you know, essential to us for our day to day work at HQ. To be honest, I couldn’t even tell you what these files were, since they had no official name when I found them,” Lyla explains.
“Files… What are you getting at?” Miguel asks.
“I’ve retrieved them, uncovered what they were. Including the corrupted files. On my little free time, I’ve been restoring the files and well… It turns out that I had forgotten about some of these files due to previous system reboots. Since they were somehow omitted from my system due to previous shut downs, I didn’t even know they existed anymore, especially being lost and corrupted files within the system.”
“What are they? Why is it important to tell us this now?” Miguel asks, holding on to the guitar. His heart begins to race a little, even though he tells himself to not be stupid - to not have hope there’s more.
“Both the lost and corrupted files have turned out to be…” Lyla trails off, looking between Miguel and you. “Photos and videos of Gabby and you. New ones, not the ones you have already.”
Miguel inhales sharply, his heart racing as Lyla’s words sink in. “It’s not possible,” he says without thinking.
“It is, Miguel,” she replies offering a genuine look. “And I swear I didn’t hide them this time. They were lost and even I had no idea they were just sitting there in the system. I came across the folder sometime over the summer after you were injured and decided to work on them. It wasn’t until October or so that one of the files turned out to be a photo of her. I wanted to tell you right away, but then, I figured that since I didn’t even know about this one photo being lost, maybe a few more files would turn out to be photos of her, too. I was hoping to have it done by Father’s Day, but well, things happen at HQ…” Lyla says apologetically. “I finished today. My work proved to be successful because almost every file was of Gabby. I finished recovering the last one today and I’m happy to tell you that there’s over twenty photos on top of some videos. Do you wish to see them?”
“Yes,” Miguel breathes out. “Yes. Please show them to me.” He turns to look at you, his eyes filled with so many emotions - surprise, disbelief, happiness, and excitement.
“I’ll go - I’m going to wait upstairs,” you say, already making the move to stand up so Miguel will have privacy to look at the photos.
“You don’t have to,” Miguel says, suddenly placing a hand on your shoulder for a few seconds, making you go still at the unexpected touch. “Stay, please.”
You stare at each other as Miguel slowly retrieves his hand. He didn’t plan nor anticipated it. It was a genuine reaction, to keep you here, with him.
“Will you?” he asks.
Nodding, you settle back down. “Yes. If you want to, I will.”
“Thank you,” he replies with a small nod. He turns to Lyla, readjusting his position. “Lyla…”
“Yes, boss?” she replies, knowing.
“Go ahead,” Miguel states, his heart racing. His fingers fiddle with the guitar’s strings, feeling nervous. As Lyla prepares, the idea sinks further. There’s more photos and videos of Gabby. All this time, there’s been more memories sitting in the system, lost but finally recovered.
“Here are the photos,” Lyla says gently as she makes a holographic screen accessible. She turns to you, giving you a small smile and a subtle thumbs up. You suppose she was thinking back to the time when she hid photos of Gabby and his wife, and how Miguel reacted then by shutting her down, but his reaction today is far different. The Miguel from then, you suspect, had done little healing. You turn to the screen after acknowledging her with a nod and a small smile, giving your full attention to Gabby.
Three seconds later, there she is. Beside you, Miguel sighs the way a parent does when looking at old photographs of their children, with nostalgia.
“Gabby,” he whispers, his gaze soft as he takes in the photo of her sitting on a living room floor, coloring books and pencils scattered over a coffee table. Her face is one of concentration as she colors, dressed in jeans and a pink shirt with her hair down.
Photo after photo, Miguel and you observe each one, drinking in the details the way you drink café de olla [coffee]. Slowly, with delicacy and love. While Miguel is thrown right back into his memories, you get more glimpses of his life with her, of that short time. You finally see a little bit more of that universe, leaving an incredible pain in you knowing these photographs and Gabby’s guitar, is basically the only evidence left that that universe once existed to begin with.
Despite that feeling, you smile as the photos progress, seeing Miguel with such a happy smile with his daughter. Your heart beats with tenderness seeing how happy they looked, sharing father and daughter moments, such as them playing dolls on her bedroom floor, a flower sticker on Miguel’s hair.
“I didn’t notice it until I was going to shower,” Miguel says with an amused smile. “She noticed it for sure but she didn’t tell me.”
You laugh softly. “She was probably wondering how long it’ll take before you realized.”
“Most likely,” Miguel agrees, shaking his head in amusement before you both turn back to look at the next photo.
Everything is fine and lighthearted inside you as more photos are displayed but your throat suddenly feels impossibly restricted when the photo changes to one of a sleeping Miguel and Gabby on her bed. An open book, abandoned, can be seen on the side. It’s clearly night time, a single lit lamp in what used to be the little girl’s bedroom while Gabby and Miguel sleep, the latter having fallen asleep at some point while reading to his daughter. Your vision becomes blurry when you spot their same sleepy faces, their mouths open just slightly, identically like father and daughter. Silently, the tears roll down your face without warning.
You don’t dare turn to look at Miguel, or even make a subtle move to wipe your tears away because you don’t wish for him to see you crying. You don’t want your tears to make him tear up, too. Inhaling gently, you attempt to swallow the painful knot in your throat and rein in your emotions, but your eyes remain fixed on the photo, on sleeping Miguel and Gabby - no worries in their minds as they peacefully sleep.
For Gabby, she’s in the comfort of her father’s arms - safe and sound, protected. For Miguel, you imagine in those moments that the multiverse didn’t exist. It was a far away concept in those moments, so far he slipped into his sleep with ease and without a fight - a high contrast to what awaited him in the future. Sleepless and long nights in his dark and empty lab due to nightmares, alone with the exception of Lyla at times. The children’s books he read to Gabby replaced with data reports pertaining to the multiverse once more by a cruel and unexpected twist of misfortune, something Miguel has been no stranger to.
Still staring at the photo, you once again wonder how different Miguel’s life would have been had Gabby’s universe not collapsed. You wonder if he’d still live there in that universe, or whether he would’ve told Gabby and his wife about his universe, have them move to Nueva York, here to his penthouse.
You wonder, if perhaps, Miguel and his wife would’ve divorced and it would’ve been Gabby and Miguel alone then.
You wonder if her room would’ve been Gabriel’s, or if Miguel would’ve done changes to the penthouse, like making the upstairs office an extra bedroom. Perhaps, on this coffee table in front of you, Gabby’s coloring books or hair ties, or something that belonged to her, could be found.
“I used to read to her every night,” Miguel says, bringing his knees close to him, resting his arms on them. “I’m so glad there’s a memory of it. That I can see her sleepy face again physically, not just in my head.” He wipes his eye using the sleeve of his sweatshirt. He sniffles quietly before he reaches with his hand, zooming in on her specifically. He traces his daughter’s face as if he were actually tracing it physically, with such tenderness and so much love. “Su carita [her little face],” he whispers. “I’d forget everything about the Spider Society at the sight of that little face. I wasn’t Spider-Man. I was just ‘papá’ or ‘daddy’ - and my biggest worry was a scraped knee during practices [papa].”
He turns to face you slowly, finally realizing you’ve been so quiet, so still. His gaze softens when you turn away as an attempt to keep him from seeing your face, the tears staining your cheeks.
“Dulzura?”
“Yeah?” you reply, clearing your throat, trying to make it seem like you’re fine.
“You don’t have to hide your tears,” Miguel says gently. “Not from me.”
With that, you turn to face him. You offer him a small smile. “I’m sorry… This photo…” you trail off, looking away to dry your damp cheeks. “You just - Your sleeping faces are the same,” you continue, chuckling softly instead of crying, even though your eyes are still tearing up. “Even the way your mouths are open just slightly.” You sniffle. “It’s so… sweet, Miguel.”
You shakily huff, drying your face with the back of your hand. You wish you could blame your emotions on something else, like your period, but it’s not even time for that yet. Your emotions are running uncontrollably purely because of Miguel and his daughter. It’s due to the tenderness of this photo and every single moment they were able to share, but knowing it wasn’t, isn’t, and never will be enough for Miguel or Gabby.
And God, you wish on everything that Gabby was here right now. You wish there was a way that time could go back, that you had the answers to the real cause for the collapse of universes. And then, you’d go back and prevent it from happening, along with every other universe that’s been lost.
“You think so?” Miguel asks, his eyes twinkling with delight hearing you say that Gabby and he share the same sleeping faces.
“Absolutely,” you reply. “It’s clear as day.”
Miguel sighs, dropping his arm. He wraps his arms around his legs and stares at the photo some more. “Thank you for saying that,” he whispers. “That makes me feel… happy. Happier.”
“Always,” you whisper back, able to look at the photo again. “This one… It would be sweet to have in your room.”
Miguel hums. “My nightstand.”
“Close to you,” you reply, nodding.
You fall into a comfortable silence, despite the emotions, and continue to observe the photo for a few more minutes before Miguel asks Lyla to display the rest. Each one is as sweet and tender as the last one, but thankfully you don’t cry anymore, or at least not as much.
“There are a few videos,” Lyla says turning to look at Miguel, talking for the first time since she shared the fact that these files exist. She’s been silently watching the two of you, glad that Miguel has you by his side while he goes through the photos - relieved that he isn’t alone today, and tomorrow, and the date afterwards. He has someone. You. “Do you wish to watch them?”
“Yes, please,” Miguel answers turning to look at Lyla before his eyes turn back to the screen.
As time goes on, Miguel and you watch the videos, all of which are of just him and Gabby. And thankfully, they’re all long videos. You watch Gabriella play fútbol in the backyard with Miguel. There’s the one Christmas they spent together, with Gabby excitedly showing Miguel new toys.
“Christmas,” Miguel says softly. “She was so excited. I did the Santa’s snow boots footprints, she was squealing with happiness when she woke up and saw them,” he shares.
You watch the video, thinking. Miguel was that kind of father, and it makes so much sense.
At last, Lyla turns to face the two of you. “This is the last one,” Lyla says softly as the screen changes before it starts.
Miguel and you both watch as the video clip begins playing, starting with Gabby on display holding her guitar and playing it. Miguel sits on a chair watching with an expression that leaves no room for question how proud he felt in that moment. Like in every video and photo, Miguel’s eyes have a special spark, one you recognize in Peter B. and MJ, Jess and her husband, and Mr. and Mrs. Morales. It’s the spark a loving, caring parent has in their eyes when looking at or talking about their child. Miguel had it around Gabby, and now it’s only visible when he talks about her, or when he looks at her photos.
A warm, gentle, and beautiful smile grazes his face as he watches and listens to Gabby expertly play the guitar at such age, a look of concentration on her sweet face. She plays a melody you don’t recognize but one she seems to know by heart, no mistakes made. She ends her playing gently, the sound pleasant to the ears before she eagerly and expectantly looks at her father, a smile that reminds you of Miguel’s, too, on her face.
“That was amazing, mija [my daughter]!” Miguel says suddenly with such energy you swear you’ve never seen in him before. “You get better and better the more you practice, eh? My little musician!”
You smile, seeing Gabby’s smile widen before she runs to her father, throwing her arms around his neck. The sight of Miguel instantly wrapping his arms around his daughter makes your heart weak. There has never been any doubt in your mind that Miguel loved, still loves, Gabby, but this interaction hits you deeply. You see the way his eyes close in content, his smile unfaltering as he hugs his daughter tightly. He’s so proud of her. He’s so loving, tender, sweet.
There’s also no doubt in your mind. Being a father suits him so much even if he once thought he wasn’t meant to. Quite the contrary, Miguel was meant to be a father.
“Now it’s your turn, daddy! You play and sing!” Gabby says excitedly, pulling back to offer Miguel the guitar.
Miguel shakes his head gently. “I think you should keep playing, mija [my daughter].”
“Please? Pretty please, daddy?” Gabby insists, puppy eyes on full display. “Sing my favorite song, please.”
And just like Miguel has told you before, he was never able to say no to Gabby when it came to healthy, harmless requests like these. He accepts the guitar.
“Just one song, and then you play again. ¿Entiendes, chiquilla [do you understand, little girl]?”
“Okay, okay! Ya se [I know], but please! I like to hear you sing, daddy,” Gabby says taking a seat in front of Miguel on the floor, watching him like he’s the center of her universe.
“Okay, okay. Ay vamos [we’re going, starting]…” Miguel says with a little sigh. “How does it start?”
“Dad!” Gabby whines with a little huff. “You know how it starts!”
“I forgot. What are the first notes, again?” Miguel asks with a sweet, playful smile that stays on his face as Gabby tells him. “Ah, okay. So… Something like this,” he says playing a few notes that earns him eager nods from Gabby. “Okay, I think I got it, mija [my daughter].” He begins to play the guitar again, the same notes Gabby was playing earlier but continuing on.
And for the first time since you’ve known Miguel, you hear him truly sing.
“Luna gardenia de plata que en mi serenata, te vuelves canción. Tú que me viste cantando, me ves hoy llorando, mi desilusión. Calles bañadas de luna que fueron la cuna de mi juventud. Vengo a cantarle a mi amada, la luna plateada de mi Xelajú…” Miguel sings with ease, his brows furrowing slightly, gazing at his daughter who smiles tenderly at her father. “En mis noches de pena, por una morena de dulce mirar,” Miguel continues singing, smiling at Gabby, nodding at her. He earns himself a sweet, happy, and toothy smile along with an applause from Gabby’s hands, and it’s so heartwarming, so sweet Miguel can’t help himself from stopping midway when he sees Gabby rise and head straight for him.
He welcomes her in his arms, laughing softly as he places the guitar down to fully embrace her like it’s the last time he’ll ever be able to. The thought breaks you. He never imagined he’d lose her - not while embracing her like that nor when he read bedtime stories to her.
“Again, daddy! This time all the song, please,” Gabby says hugging Miguel, her father.
“Okay, okay, mija [my daughter], but first we need to have dinner. C’mon, the caldo [broth] should be ready now,” Miguel says carrying her to what you assume is the kitchen. “Le agregue muchas papitas pa’ que comas. Tienes que comer pa’ que estés fuerte y sana. ¿Recuerdas? [I added a lot of potatoes so you’ll eat. You must eat so you’ll be strong and healthy. Remember?]”
“¡Y pollito [and chicken]!” Gabby says making Miguel chuckle.
“Si y mucho pollito. También zanahorias [yes and chicken. Carrots, too].”
“Eugh, no carrots, please.”
The last thing heard is Miguel’s laughter as they both disappear into the kitchen, the screen returning to the all familiar marigold color used for all screens in the Spider Society.
You chuckle softly as you remember something. “So she wasn’t fond of carrots either.”
Turning to look at you, Miguel frowns softly yet he’s amused. He remembers that evening so vividly now, how it felt to carry his daughter to the kitchen so they could check on the food. “Either?”
“Remember when you were injured last year?” you ask, which instantly reminds Miguel.
“Dios [God], that carrot was disgusting,” he says frowning deeply. “I don’t know how we didn’t throw up right there.”
Covering your mouth, you laugh, recalling the face he made that day when he tried it. “I’m sorry.”
“You’re laughing,” Miguel says raising an eyebrow, feigning disappointment and offense. “Can’t believe you made me try it.”
“I didn’t think it was actually bad,” you reply. “In my defense, I thought since it’s this dimension, and all the great resources at HQ, that the infirmary food would be top notch.”
“Mala [Meanie, feminine version in Spanish],” Miguel replies, amusement dancing in his eyes. “At least you tried it, too. So we’re even.”
“Never again.” You chuckle again. “If I ever end up there, please spare me from the carrots.”
Miguel’s amusement falters a bit. “I hope you’re never there. Not even for a minor cut, but I promise I’ll spare you from the horrible food,” he says earnestly, leaving no doubt in your mind that you’ll never taste that food. Again. “I swear.”
“Thank you,” you reply softly with a smile.
“Always. I’ll protect your food palate,” he says, amused yet again.
You both smile at each other, staying quiet for a few seconds before you speak again. “That was… Very beautiful, Miguel,” you start quietly. “Your voice. You singing to Gabby her favorite song. You made her happy, so happy.”
He nods, his smile shifting to a much tender one. “I sang it to her every time she wanted me to. It was a pure request, an easy way to make her happy. I always wanted her to be so,” Miguel shares. “And if I could make her happy in such an easy way, I would. It was also bonding for us. I never wanted to make her feel like I didn’t want to spend time with her, like she was being rejected. I wanted her to feel loved,” he adds softly. “For her to know she was deeply loved and cared for. That she didn’t need to hide anything. I wanted her to have what I…” Miguel pauses, swallowing. “What I didn’t have at her age. That unconditional love, protection, and tenderness from a parent. Constant. Not in pauses, making her wonder if she had done something wrong.”
Nodding, you sigh softly. You know about Miguel’s childhood; about the situation with his mother Conchata and his stepfather, on top of the situation with his biological father. You try not to think about it often because each time you do, anger and sadness flares up inside you for him. You hate that Miguel experienced such rejection and negligence in his early life, how it has affected him throughout the years.
You’re glad, at least, that by the end of Conchata’s life, Miguel had somewhat of a stable relationship with her, something you’ve wondered about sometimes at random times. You wonder, if time had allowed, whether Miguel and her could’ve worked on their relationship, if by now they’d have a better one, but of course, it’s fruitless to think of such moments. Conchata has been gone for several years.
Another thing you wonder is if she saw the way Miguel stepped up to the role of father and how wonderful, tender, sweet, and loving he was to Gabby from wherever she is. You wonder if she felt shame, knowing her son tried to be everything she hardly was for Gabby.
“It’s evident you did just that,” you say at last, concentrating on the now. “She was so happy, Miguel. Her laughter, her smiles - all signs of a happy, safe, and loved child.”
Miguel hums, his gaze softening at your words. “Thank you,” he whispers. “I tried my best to be a good father.” He turns his gaze towards the guitar, the lovely and bittersweet song stuck in his head. He picks it up and holds it, remembering how many times he played the song for her. His fingers glide over the stickers, thinking how it’s still her birthday.
There’s a chance her favorite song would’ve changed by now. Maybe she wouldn’t be interested in playing the guitar anymore but rather another instrument. There’s a lot of things that could’ve changed by now, truly. Maybe Gabby would’ve stopped playing fútbol. Maybe she would’ve stopped loving science.
He’ll never know now.
But maybe there’s a chance, that despite the years… “Luna de Xelajú” would still hold a special place in her tender heart. Maybe she’d appreciate her father remembering the times she asked him to play it for her, to sing her the song while gazing at her, letting her know that she was his morena de dulce mirar [his brunette, or of dark complexion, girl with a sweet gaze]. Just maybe, she’d let her old man play and sing it for her on her birthday even if she no longer begged him to sing it by wrapping her short arms around his neck, giggling and calling him daddy.
Just maybe.
Miguel clears his throat and positions his fingers. How does it start?
“You know how it starts!”
He hears Gabby’s voice in his head, even the little huff. Right. Like this. His fingers move, playing the notes for the first time since he lost his daughter. For a moment, he thinks he messed up, but no, his memory doesn’t betray him, and so his fingers move, as if they had a mind of their own.
You watch as he begins to play, familiar to your ears now thanks to the video. Your eyes remain on him, not missing even a second of this. For a moment, you wonder if you’re imagining it, but no, Miguel really is playing the guitar and playing Gabby’s song, at least the beginning of it.
You suddenly realize what he’s trying to do, just as Lyla does, too because a second later, Lyla displays a photo of Gabby, one of the new ones, for Miguel.
Miguel is going to play and sing the song for her, on her birthday.
Holding your breath, you watch Miguel lift his gaze to the screen, still playing the guitar before he begins.
“Luna gardenia de plata, que en mi serenata te vuelves canción. Tú que me viste cantando, me ves hoy llorando mi desilusión,” Miguel sings softly, staring at his daughter’s photo, his expression gentle yet with a trace of mourning and grief. “Luna de Xelajú, que supiste alumbrar, en mis noches de pena por una morena de dulce mirar,” he continues, his gaze softening and his mouth pouting.
You remain still, almost as still as a statue itself. You have heard Miguel sing before when he does so under his breath, sometimes unaware of it, but nothing compare to this. If his voice sounds beautiful in the video, it sounds angelic live. His voice travels straight to your heart.
Still playing, Miguel’s eyes fill with some tears. After so long, he’s playing and singing her song. For so long, he’s tried to not think of it, finding it to be too much for him, too soon for his grieving heart, but his very heart seems to have found today appropriate for it.
Maybe it’s another sign of him healing, Miguel doesn’t know, but he has no regrets playing it now. It feels right, so he continues, hoping that wherever Gabby is, she’s listening to him sing it at last, just for her.
“En mi vida no habrá, más cariño que tú, mi amor. Porque no eres ingrata, mi Luna de plata, luna de Xelajú. Luna que me alumbró, en mis noches de amor… [in my life there won’t be more love than you, my love. Because you’re not ungrateful, my moon of silver, moon of Xelajú. Moon that lightened me up, in my nights of love]” Miguel sings, his fingers slowing down as he pauses for a few seconds. “Hoy consuelas la pena… Por una morena… que me… Abandonó [today you console the sorrow… for a brunette, or girl of dark complexion… that… abandoned me],” he sings the end in a whisper, a single tear rolling down his face as his fingers play the last notes, finishing the song.
He lowers the guitar to his lap slowly, still gazing at Gabby’s photo. He doesn’t bother to wipe away the tear that slowly trails down his face. Instead, he lets it run its course until it sinks into his skin. Miguel inhales heavily and sighs. Something in him, so deep, settling in. It’s a certain kind of peace.
At last, several seconds later, you sigh as well. You didn’t realize you held your breath throughout the entirety of the song, but you did. You didn’t want to miss a single moment of Miguel singing to Gabby; from hearing his gentle, soothing voice.
“That was beautiful,” you whisper quietly, looking at Gabby’s photo.
Miguel smiles slowly. “Thank you,” he whispers back. “I haven’t played, sang, nor heard it since then. The last time was before I lost her. Even the simple thought of it, the melody in my head - was too much for me,” Miguel admits, gathering his thoughts. “If she was alive, I know she’d be changing. The things she once liked, maybe she wouldn’t be much into anymore. Maybe this song wouldn’t be her favorite anymore. There’s a chance… I know, but even then, before I decided to play it, I thought maybe, just maybe, from wherever she’s at, keeping me safe, she might enjoy me playing her once favorite song from down here on Earth… I hope she heard it.”
You smile softly, still staring at the photo and think about Miguel’s words. Maybe Gabby’s music taste would’ve changed by now. Perhaps “Luna de Xelajú” would no longer be her favorite song, and maybe it’s wishful thinking, but a part of you believes that Gabby would’ve loved the beautiful gesture from her dad regardless. And for some reason, you also can’t help but think that maybe she did hear it tonight.
The two flickering birthday candles from earlier come back to mind. That was rather strange. You wonder silently. Maybe the two most important people in Miguel’s life, visited him tonight in their own way.
“I have a feeling she did,” you reply softly.
Miguel turns to face you, shifting his body slightly. “You may think I’m a little bit crazy,” he starts, making you tilt your head towards him with a raised eyebrow, letting him know you don’t. He smiles a bit. “The flickering candles.”
You nod. “I was just thinking about that. Two candles,” you reply.
“Two candles,” Miguel repeats. “Gabby. Gabriel.” He smiles a bit at that. “You don’t think I’m… overthinking it? Maybe with my messed up sleep schedule, I’m just… Not making sense.”
“You’re allowed to believe that,” you state gently. “I’m never going to judge you. I had my fair share of moments in which I felt like Peter and my parents were - leaving me little signs. I also thought about them, you know.” You shift slightly to face him better. “About Gabby and Gabriel.”
Miguel smiles, his head dipping to face the floor. It’s reassuring. He straightens up to look at you again.
“I know I already said it earlier, but, I want to say I’m sorry again. For the way I behaved these last few days.”
You prepare yourself to reply but Miguel lifts his finger, stopping you.
“I don’t want to… Push you away nor make you feel like I’m trying to when I’m not. I have,” Miguel pauses, thinking about that mutual agreement between you some weeks ago.
“We do. We have each other,” Miguel said, before adding, “Always.”
“Always,” you replied.
He also thinks about how you’ve only been a part of his life for a few years. Two, to be exact. It’s a realization that for some reason feels so wrong to him. He wishes you could’ve been in his life sooner, but there’s no time machine to do that, or Miguel would’ve already used it to bring back Gabby and Gabriel. There’s no changing the past, unfortunately, but he has control over some aspects of the future, and he’s already made up his mind. You may have entered his life only two years ago, but he’ll try his absolute best to make sure you stick for the rest of his - until his last breath.
“I don’t want to ever…” he tries and clears his throat. “I don’t want to - I’d like for you - stick around.” He sighs and runs a quick hand through his hair. “I’m not trying to push you - away. Ever.”
You smile at that. “To be honest, it’s going to take a lot for you to push me away. I’m afraid… You’re stuck with me,” you say.
He laughs softly, the sound making your heart swell. “Like that’s a bad thing,” Miguel answers.
“Well… Just saying, so you don’t complain later on.”
“I could never,” Miguel replies, smiling softly.
“Lyla, I hope you recorded that,” you reply, earning yourself a chuckle from Miguel, one that makes you chuckle, too before you both settle into a comfortable silence.
The holographic screen is still available, the same photo of Gabby displayed with one of the sweetest smiles you’ve ever seen.
It’s several minutes later when Miguel breaks the silence. “Tomorrow I’m printing all the photos.” And then remembering, he adds. “Thank you, Lyla. For recovering everything. I… I had no idea there were more photos and videos. Thank you.”
“You got it, Miguel,” Lyla says, looking between him and you, happy that she was able to restore everything. “I’m heading off now. I have some things to work on. Good night.”
“Night,” Miguel replies.
“Good night,” you answer before she disappears.
“Are you tired?” Miguel asks gently.
“Not a lot,” you reply, even though last night you only slept for a few hours. You know Miguel slept even less. “You?”
He shakes his head slightly. “No. Not yet.” He picks up the guitar and plays a few strings, ones you don't recognize.
You remain by his side, letting time go by in each other’s company. Despite the emotions, the mood is lighthearted. Miguel is no longer as quiet and he even offers a few more smiles as the hours go by, smiles that actually reach his eyes.
As time slips by, you notice Miguel grow sleepier and sleepier, which is not surprising. At some point you find him nodding off, so you suggest that he goes to bed but he declines, stating he’s not sleepy yet.
Except, he is and he ends up falling asleep sitting next to you. In a matter of minutes, you grab a pillow from upstairs and your blanket before you reach him. You talk to him softly, waking him enough to talk to him.
“Lay down,” you say, watching the way he looks at you sleepily.
“Mm - no,” he replies, sleepily.
“You’ve fallen asleep. Lay down,” you try again. “Please?”
He sighs, yawning. “I wasn’t sleepy.”
You hold back from chuckling. “I totally believe you. Now, lay down. Please.”
He sighs again, all sleepy and stubborn, but finally lays down.
“Sleep,” you whisper firmly. “Rest, Migs.”
“Are you going upstairs?” he whispers sleepily, his eyes fluttering as he gazes at you, with a hint of a pout.
You smile tenderly at him, the sight of his sleepy features and voice warming your heart.
“I'm staying here,” you reply as you cover him with your blanket, wondering if the reason why he’s asking is because he'll like for you to stay.
“Mm,” he hums sleepily, satisfied with your answer. “Thank you.” He sighs softly, relaxing and settling.
“Lift your head, Miguel.”
“Mhm.” Miguel does so slightly, more asleep than awake now.
You fix the pillow behind his head, your fingers accidentally brushing the small curls on the nape of his neck including the sensitive skin there, eliciting a gentle hum from Miguel, one of contentment, of satisfaction.
You freeze for a second, the sound surprising you. After a second or two, you smile and finish fixing it, pulling the blanket higher up.
“Sleep, Migs,” you whisper tenderly.
“Mhm, dulzura,” Miguel mumbles, dozing off at last.
You take a seat next to him. The holographic screen is still available, displaying the same photo from earlier.
You get comfortable and stare at the photo, thinking about all the new ones, about the videos. You got more glimpses of Miguel's life with his daughter. More glimpses of him being a father.
Turning your attention back to Miguel and taking in all his features, you think once more.
He was meant to be a dad.
You wonder if there's a chance of him opening his heart to someone one day. Of falling in love and having a child. Or, maybe two, or three. Maybe even four.
With thoughts of the possibility of Miguel building a family with someone, you fall asleep yourself.
It's many hours later when you wake up naturally, without the need of an alarm. To your relief, you find Miguel still sleeping peacefully by your side.
Standing up, you notice his sleeping face, once again remembering how similar it is to Gabby's. You hum to yourself, heart swelling with tenderness, before deciding to make coffee.
You go through yesterday's events silently as you prepare the pot and set up the mugs, opting for some simple ones today instead of grabbing more colorful ones, like the mug you gifted Miguel for Father’s Day due to the circumstances of Gabby’s birthday. You wait patiently, remaining quiet to avoid waking up Miguel and think to yourself. You can't believe that all this time there were more photos and videos of Gabby, lost but thankfully recovered and restored by Lyla.
“Good morning,” Miguel says entering the kitchen, his voice still laced with sleep.
“Good morning,” you reply, offering Miguel a smile. “Coffee is almost ready.”
He nods before running a hand through his hair, it being a little disheveled from his sleep. His movement slows down as he vaguely remembers your fingers brushing his hair and neck, a memory that makes his cheeks feel warmer. “I could use some, muchas gracias [thank you].”
“Always,” you reply, not noticing the gentle redness on his cheeks.
He leans on the counter, still waking up and trying to gather his thoughts. He looks over at the coffee and the mugs, remembering. He moves to where the mugs are found and finds the one. It’s the one he’s been using since you gifted it to him; his mug from Father’s Day with the bees. He retrieves it and moves towards you, placing it on the counter near the two you already have out.
“My favorite,” Miguel says looking at it, still so touched by your gifts, bringing a smile to your face.
So, you serve him coffee in that mug and watch him drink it, raising the mug you made with your own hands to his lips. It’s how you also notice the bracelet you gifted him with Gabby’s name on his wrist, another sight that makes you happy. It seems Miguel really liked the gifts.
“Do you want to come with me?” Miguel asks, lowering the mug. “I’m going to the flower market.”
“If it’s alright,” you say, remembering Miguel’s plans to buy flowers for Gabby to place on the altar. “I’d like to.”
Miguel nods. “I’d like for you to come.”
After drinking your mugs of coffee in peace, you both get ready and dress in civilians clothes. For the second time, you borrow the simple holographic suit Miguel allowed you to borrow months ago when your apartment building caught on fire and your suit was dirty and smelling of smoke.
You both slip out of the penthouse and swing through the city before most of the people of Nueva York are awake, before the city is truly buzzing with life. On an alleyway, you both deactivate the suits and step out onto the street wearing your normal clothes to search through the flower market.
You walk around side by side, admiring the different types of flowers available, trying to find the perfect ones for Gabby. You eventually find bouquets that seem to attract both of you; a lovely combination of white and lilac flowers. Together, you choose the best bouquet out of the bunch before continuing to walk around. Despite your mission being accomplished, it seems Miguel is in no rush to leave.
As you both continue to walk around, his gaze turns to you, noticing the way you eye certain flowers with glee and interest. You even stop at certain displays to take a closer look, so Miguel stops to look at them with you, sticking by your side while holding the bouquet he’s already bought.
His brows shoot up when he sees the owner, an older lady, of the display talk to you, inviting you to see further in the back when you stop on theirs.
You shoot him an apologetic smile as the woman enthusiastically talks to you about other options, so he smiles back with a look that lets you know that it’s okay.
“Mujeres. ¿Verdad? [Women. Right?]”
Miguel turns, a little startled by the sudden voice. He finds a man, a much older one.
“¿Disculpe? [Sorry?]” Miguel replies, towering over the man.
“Mujeres divinas. ¿Que haríamos sin ellas? Hermosas. Y mira como les encantan las flores [Divine women. What would we do without them? Beautiful. And look how much they love flowers],” the man says with a smile. “Parece que ya le llevas un arreglo pero le gustan mucho las flores. Así esta mi esposa [looks like you already have an arrangement (bouquet )but she likes flowers. That’s how my wife is],” he says, nodding to the owner. Miguel quickly realizes the owner is the man’s wife. “You know, she pointed you guys out from the little early crowd.”
Miguel clears his throat, looking down at the bouquet of flowers. His mind immediately puts together what the man is insinuating, or rather what he believes.
“She did?” Miguel questions.
“She said that was us thirty-five years ago.”
“Oh,” Miguel says simply for a moment, struck by the fact that two more people have confused him and you for a couple in two weeks, remembering the lady from the grocery store. “We’re… just friends. Best friends.”
The man laughs as his wife and you walk back to them, talking. “That’s how my wife and I started. Friendship is one of the most essential foundations for a blissful and long marriage, mijo [my son]. Take it from me. Thirty-two years of marriage, three kids later. Something to think about, eh? Take care, mijo, and take care of that one, too,” the man says nodding at Miguel and then at you before he withdraws to meet his wife, leaving Miguel speechless.
He watches as the couple talk to you a bit more before finally letting you free. You join his side a few seconds later, smiling.
“Sorry, Mrs. Gonzalez wanted to show me other flowers she has in the back,” you say.
“You learned her name,” Miguel states.
“She introduced herself,” you reply with a shrug. “She was very excited about showing me some flowers. I couldn’t say no.”
“Did you like them?” he asks.
“They were lovely,” you answer, looking at a certain bouquet that caught your eye.
He nods and before you can say anything, he talks to the owners in Spanish.
“Me quiero llevar uno de esos arreglos, por favor. ¿Cuanto es? [I want to take one of those bouquets, please. How much?]”
You watch as the transaction is quickly made between Miguel and Mr. Gonzalez, the latter whispering something to Miguel that you can’t catch.
“¡Gracias, tenga un buen día, don [Thank you, have a good day, sir]!” Miguel says before walking back to you. He hands you the bouquet. “For… you. I noticed you eyeing these.”
You accept them. “Yes, these….” you reply, looking at them and feeling a little awestruck by the fact that you’re suddenly holding a bouquet of flowers bought by Miguel for you. “Thank you. I’ll pay you back. Maybe with some snacks from my universe,” you add at last, moving past the awe, as you both begin to walk.
“No paying back,” Miguel answers as he looks ahead, his tone being one that leaves no room for you argue about it. “It’s… a gift. Look, food trucks. Do you want some breakfast?” Miguel offers, changing the subject, and nodding at the food trucks as you both exit the flower market.
You end up having breakfast on some wooden picnic table under a large umbrella to shield yourselves from the sun since it’s summer now. You talk with ease, the tension from the last few days gone, at last. You both watch as the area quickly fills with more and more citizens from Nueva York, the city coming back to full life.
Instead of swinging back home in your suits, Miguel and you silently agree to walk on the way back. He carries both bouquets of flowers in his arms since he insisted on doing so before you left the picnic table. Together, you walk home, sticking by each other’s side like glue, with Miguel walking closest to the street, keeping you on the inside of the sidewalk.
Once you return home, Miguel and you head to the office room. There, you watch Miguel inject himself with that neon serum you now know about. He looks at you sheepishly as he does so.
“I forgot about it,” Miguel says placing the device down, a glow passing through his crimson eyes.
“It's understandable,” you reply, glad that Miguel is in a different mindset and taking care of this.
With that, you help Miguel print the new photos of Gabby. He makes extra copies for backup purposes, storing them in his personal home computer and multiple USB flashes, or some version of them since they look different in this dimension.
Miguel also retrieves the vase he mentioned the night before and at last, he has everything to set up his little altar for Gabby.
As he places one of the photos in the picture frame, you open the bouquet of flowers he bought for her and arrange it in his mom's vase.
When everything is ready, and the surface has been cleaned properly, you both approach the console table with the items. You stand by, holding the vase, and let Miguel work at his pace.
The photo is placed first and then the vase with pretty and fresh flowers. Miguel retrieves the guitar from where he left it last night and carefully places it next to the console table, taking a few moments to look at it.
He’s glad that it's not hidden away anymore, that he'll be able to look at it every day now. At last, he places a candle and lights it, completing the altar for now. Maybe in the future he'll change something, but right now, it's perfect.
The altar is beautiful. You love the fact that Miguel has added Gabby’s guitar, the flowers that bring such a lovely energy to the living room, but most of all, you love seeing Gabby’s photo on the console table.
And so does Miguel.
You both stand in front of the console table for several minutes, simply admiring and thinking about her in silence.
A while later, you both sit on the rooftop of Miguel’s building, peacefully. You remember that it’s a work day and that both Miguel and you are technically “late” to work by now, but you say nothing. You’re certain Miguel already knows what time it is, and that if he wanted to, both of you would’ve already been there. It seems he’s okay with being late today.
He gazes at the sky, at the soft cloud formations, thinking and unworried about making it to HQ. He trusts that the rest of the team can handle the tasks, just a few more hours, without either of you.
After some time of peaceful silence, Miguel remembers.
“How’s reconstruction going for your building?” he asks.
“It’s almost done. I think in a week or two, we should get the okay to move back in.”
Miguel almost frowns, but he keeps the same look on his face. A week or two. His chest feels heavy all of a sudden and he wonders where time went.
“That’s… Good for the building, and everyone,” Miguel forces himself to say. Sure, he’s glad that everyone will be able to go back, that you’ll have your apartment once again - the one you love so much. Hell, even he misses the comfort and coziness from it, but… Why does the idea hurt him more than he thought it would?
He gulps. In a week or two you’ll be gone, back to your universe. He places his hand on the rooftop’s ground, accidentally brushing his fingers against yours.
“Sorry,” he apologizes instantly, worried he may have squeezed some of your fingers with his larger hand.
“It’s alright,” you reply with a smile, keeping your hand where it was, unbothered.
Miguel places his hand near yours, both of you silent and thinking about your upcoming return to your apartment.
A part of you is happy your place will be available again and yet… You sigh softly, staring at the clouds just like Miguel.
Neither of you say anything else about it, equally avoiding further conversation regarding the matter without knowing.
“I know it’s barely time, but what if we stay here for lunch?” Miguel says after a while. “A homemade lunch.”
“That sounds great,” you reply. “What do you feel like eating?”
“Hmm,” Miguel hums, thinking. “What are you up to?”
You laugh. “I’m up for anything.”
“That narrows it down a lot, thank you,” Miguel says sarcastically with a soft smirk.
“Happy to help,” you reply with your own little smirk.
God, he’s going to miss having you here, Miguel suddenly thinks. He forces himself to not think of that. Not again today. He clears his throat. “Let’s head back. It’s growing hotter. We can think inside of what to cook.”
You both slip back inside the penthouse, into the cool air.
“Maybe we can make some chilaquiles [Mexican dish]?” you offer, now in the living room.
“That’s an idea,” Miguel replies as you both stop in front of Gabby’s altar once more.
You both stare at it, the candle still on.
Slowly, you offer your pinky finger. A second later without hesitation, Miguel wraps his around yours.
“Thank you for sticking around,” he says quietly. “Despite my mood.”
“Always,” you reply. “No matter what.”
Miguel gives your pinky a hug with his own. “Always.”
A minute later, you both head to the kitchen to start prepping lunch, splitting up tasks to finish sooner, leaving Gabby’s altar in the living room.
The candle’s flame flickers and dances, peacefully.
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A/N: It's here!! The way life kept holding me back from writing this chapter?? But it's finally here :) I loved writing this one so much (I've loved writing every single chapter lets be real) but I've been planning the concept of you helping Miguel celebrate Gabby's birthday since part 3 when we first learned Miguel doesn't celebrate birthdays but instead, makes an ofrenda for his deceased loved ones. Can't believe we're already on part 17, or that we're even on a part 17 to begin with!
I'm going to make this as quick as possible because you've already given my fic and me so much time of your day/night, so... Some of you may or may not know but this month (July) will make one year since I started writing this story and writing fanfic again in general after several years. To be specific, I posted the first chapter on July 29th. 🥺
I seriously doubt that I'll have the next chapter by then, so I just wanted to take the time today to give you guys a huge THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart 🥹❤️ I say it again, and again, and again, but the support this story and my writing has received since I started writing fanfic again truly means so much to me!! I know I also say this a lot, but I genuinely didn't think many people would be interested to read this fanfic that initially was planned out to be only 3 or 4 parts long (lol). Almost a year later, I'm still writing and this story has turned into something so much more than I planned - so much bigger - thanks to you!! All the comments, the asks, the fanart, and you lovely people I get to interact with ... Wow!!! Never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd be back to writing fanfiction, much less have it be received and loved so much!! 🥹
Special thank you to every single artist who has created fanart of Nonviolent Communication!! If you read this, I hope you know that you've made me so incredibly happy, blessed, grateful, honored, and so much more - to see such beautiful art inspired by my fic. Each time a fanart has been posted, I've screamed and cried out of excitement, and that's not exaggeration. I am beyond thankful to have the privilege of saying there's fanart for something I've written (sometimes I'm still like "no way" fr). God - my hands are shaking rn and my chest feels fuzzy. I'm a bit emotional lol, sorry, but THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! One day I may stop writing (I hope not) but please know I'm always going to cherish all the fanart (which is all saved in my computer and phone, and now tablet because it's that important to me)!!!!! 😭
I'm gonna end it here because as usual, I'm yapping in the author's note and also the tears are coming🫣 but please know, this means so much to me, and ily guys!!! Thank you for inspiring me to write for our fav Spider-Man, Miguel❤️
To celebrate a year, I'll be posting something regarding opening writing requests (for the first time) over the next week, so if you're interested, keep an eye out for my posts. I was trying to come up with something more exciting but that's all I could think of to celebrate!🤣
That's all. Thank you so much for reading again, and ily guys!! Take care!!
And for old time's sake, I still love Miguel O'Hara (even more)!!🥹
Alondra❤️
P.S. Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!
taglist: @loverlorn @saturnknows @d1lf-loverrr @eddiestitmiguelsbigdick @freehentai @arithestrawberry @scaleniusrm @haradasaya @spidermanismyfav @bitchykittenconnoisseur @thecraziestcrayon @obi-mom-kenobi @natsury-kazuki @coraline750 @edgycatx @safixiovi @sunnyx07 @nxrdamp
@rorel1a @oceanstar19 @happishark @carmilla01 @somebodyelsethanyouthink @adora-but-ginger @angie2274 @vampi-amora @tired-writer04 @plzfeedmebread @shadow-pancake9 @tynakub @faretheeoscar @giulscomix @luvstuffies @coffeeauthorvibing @lauraolar14 @bl0osclues @pinkiemme @lil-cinn @mashiromochi @loveletterfrommwah @muzansucker @theleftkittycollection @kikookii @www-interludeshadow-com @holographicang3l @aisyakirmann @bucky-to-my-barnes @geraskier-thots @l3laze @yujyujj @taylorsmakingfuckingmacandcheese @damhanallagorm @heyohalie @kaliuea @moonsua1 @darksidescorner @geminis93 @1800-get-alife @hrrtkreuz @oharasfilipinawife @dropyoursocksandgrabyourcrocss @may4ri @t4naiis @f1-hoff @llumetrii
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sweetnans · 4 months ago
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This is a new field for me I hope you like it. (Not proofread)
...
"You're hurting me. You're hurting me. You're hurting me!"
"Don't move"
A little Noya and a little you were playing hide and seek in the park when you stumbled upon a giant piece of wood and a splinter got stuck in the middle of the palm of your hand.
Nishinoya, your best friend sat you on one of the swings and took your hand to analyze how deep the splinter was.
"Don't, don't, that hurts -" you winced through the pain.
"I didn't even touch you!"
You were squirming under his touch, and Noya was worried and losing his patience.
You closed your eyes to prevent the crying from falling. Noya took a look of your face and shook his head.
"I'm going to have to take you to the hospital"
You opened your eyes in an instant. The waterfall of tears streaming down your face.
"What?" You murmured shocked.
Now you were scared.
"I'll take you in my bike"
You were barely ten years old, and he was more than ready to be your hero. You followed him to the entrance of the park where he had his bike on the sidewalk.
"Noya, I'm scared," you said, containing the sobs.
You've never seen him so serious in your life, and he was acting like you were about to die, so it freaked you out even more.
He needed to calm you down before he broke in tears too.
"If you stay still, I think I can take it off." he grabbed your good hand, giving you the necessary amount of reassurance.
You nodded, and he took you by the sidewalk.
"Here, sit,"' he guided you until you were sat on the verge. "Open your legs, wide"
You did what he said, and then he sat in between your legs, giving you the view of his back.
"Give me your hand"
You passed your hand under his arm, and he took it carefully.
"Now, lay your head on my back and close your eyes, l'lI count to three, ready?" He was acting quiet so unlike him.
You nodded against his back and closed your eyes firmly until you saw colorful stars in a black background.
"Done!" He said euphoric, going back to his usual self. You didn't even flinch from the pain. "Do you want to keep it? It's very big, " he said, holding the tiny splinter between his index and his thumb.
...
"Stay still, Yuu!"
You were now in the gym. Noya was in front of you sitting on a bench moving like he was a fish out of the ocean.
"I'm totally fine. Let me go back so I can play, " He said, eager to escape your grip.
"Your chin is fucking open in two you dumbass" you grabbed him by his shoulder to examine the injury. "How many times have I told you not to play libero in the field"
Ten minutes ago, he was playing with Tanaka and Hinata on the side of the football field. He threw himself to catch the ball but ended up with his head against the grass and his chin torn by a spiky rock
You were at the gym, talking with Kiyoko and Yachi when a crying Hinata appeared out of nothing pointing out in the direction of the football field.
With the help of Tanaka, you took him inside of the gym to check him out. It was too late to go to the nursery, and you were actually worried that he might need stitches.
"I wasn't playing libero, I am the libero," he stated triumphantly with a big smile that made him wince in pain.
You rolled your eyes and shook your head.
"We are going home, I need to look at that properly so we can make a decision." You grabbed your backpack and started searching for tissues.
"I'm not going anywhere. I need to keep improving my game!" He whined like a little kid, gaining a few muffled laughs from the team.
"Tell me where are your things and put this under your chin, press harder," you said, ignoring him and pressing the tissue in his chin while grabbing his hand for him to do it.
"I'm going to stay here!" He standed enthusiastically and quickly took a seat again. The dizziness and a stinging pain in his head taking over his body.
"Are you out of your mind? Your chin is dripping blood. You're going to make a mess of the court, and then someone else is going to get hurt"
"You don't know that," he said with a knowing-it- all voice that riled you up.
Oh my god, your patience was wearing thin
"You're right I don't know, but what I do know is that you will end up making a trail of blood and someone else would be the one cleaning it because I know you Nishinoya Yuu, I know you'll be the first to run out of the mess you've caused" you scolded him and he shrugged in defeat.
You were getting mad, and even though you've been friends since little kids and he'd known every facet of you, he had his fears, and one of them was you hitting your limit
"Here," Asahi said, giving you Noya's bag and his shoes.
"Thanks." You put it on your shoulder, balancing your own things with his things. "Say bye to your friends, Noya."
You waved them goodbye and waited for him outside while he painfully made the walk of shame out of the gym with one hand saying bye and the other stapled in his chin.
After a minute since you two left. Everyone dared to breathe again.
"That was kinda fun, I mean, if we forget about Noya's face covered in blood," Tanaka said, breaking the tension. "I like how she is with him"
"She has him walking like a dog," Tsukkishima said boldly and stoic, looking at the door.
"That's good for him, don't you think?" Suga said, nodding and glancing to the others who were also nodding in agreement while saying yeah
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itsjustaninchident · 11 months ago
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Tolerate It
Charles Leclerc x Fem!Reader
summary: Y/N cries almost about everything but don't worry Charles is there, ready to wipe her tears away.
warning/s: angst???? and fluff
author's note: idk if i gave this justice, this is like a spur of the moment thing.
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Y/N is definitely an empath, she sees stray cats and dogs on the street? she'll pet and cry for them, if only she could take all of them home. Old people alone? Bawl her eyes out. Kids that ask for money on the streets? Think how life must've treated them.
But at least she has a boyfriend to run to when it gets too hard for her, to breathe while she cries her heart out. Arms ready for her to run to and his shirt ready to get soaked by her salty tears. Must've been the reason she's made it to (your age), she has a comforting boyfriend who never found it weird she cries at all the most mundane things.
She's watching a sad movie? Don't worry Charles is there to give her tissues and feed her ice cream. "You've watched this a hundred times but never fail to cry as hard as the last time you've watched it. Nonetheless, you're adorable so you get a pass." And that would put a smile on her while Charles dry her tears and kiss her softly on her nose.
She listens to songs and suddenly a cute/angsty/happy lyric comes on? He'll rub her back and hug her through it. "It's okay, Love. Taylor Swift was probably chilling while she writes 'I know my love should be celebrated, but you tolerate it.'" Charles tries to convince her while she cries harder upon hearing the lyrics, "Okay, I am sorry. I probably shouldn't sing anymore." Which cut her crying session with a meek laugh bubbling her throat. "There's your pretty smile." He utters with full adoration. He probably still finds her gorgeous even when she's breaking down, Charles will find her pretty as much.
She stumbles upon a sad and tragic couple's story on tiktok whom she's never met in real life? Charles is right there to assure her it won't happen to them. "It was probably orchestrated, you know. Besides, we're like the perfect pair and I couldn't ask for more." He assures her rubbing circles on her back as she lay down on his chest, content to hear how his heart beats for her.
And that's what makes them a perfect couple, he was always there in her 'ugly crying' days, always ready to wipe her tears, always ready to give her comforting words "It's okay, mon cheri. I am here. I'll always love you." He says in the softest voice and all her tears will dry and a smile will shine on her face again. And just like that all her worries will fade, all the sad things she's thought of are fading into the background as if she never thought of it at all. She was able to get through the bad and sad days with him by her side, ready to wipe the tears and put a smile on her face. 
She was so used to him being there for her that when he’s no longer present, she feels a hole in her heart. There's no one to wipe the tears away rather the one she's crying for, no one making her laugh to ease the pain instead he's the reason for the pain, no one to run to when she's sad because the slightest thought of him makes her miserable already, how will she recover now when the person who takes away her sadness is now the reason why she's sad?
please I would love to hear a feedback about this one, it's like a first for me to write something so angsty????? I hate angst so I am sorry if I made u believe it will all be alright all along..... Anyway please do some request because request box is open!!! hehe happy holidays
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gadriezmannsgirl · 10 months ago
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hi love can i request something w pedri getting baby fever???? just read ur fermin one and oh my god that was amazing
I read this and now I can't this escenario out of my head
Baby Fever - P.G8
"¡Amor, que no para de llorar!" (She doesn't stop crying!) Pedri yells out to you almost crying himself while changing your crying four months niece, Amanda. "¡Así no puedo limpiarla!" (I can't clean her up like that!)
"¡Dame un segundo!" (Give me a second!) You turned off the food seeing as it was ready, cleaned your hands and jogged upstairs to yours and Pedri's room.
"Why is my baby crying?" You ask softly watching your boyfriend with a few cleaning tissues and a diaper on your bed trying to change her "Pretty girls like us don't cry!" You said with a smile and with a baby voice "¿Haz tratado cantarle?" (Have you tried singing to her?)
"Si, la vaca lola and dónde están las llaves" He looked at you "I also tried playing with her with the hairbrush and some of her toys" You saw on the floor some of her toys and at the end of the bed, Pedri's hairbrush.
Amanda has been with you for two days straight and she fell in love with your three years boyfriend's hairbrush as soon as she saw it.
"Venga, Amandita. Let's get you cleaned up! Auntie Y/N and uncle Pepi don't like you smelly" You did a face and smooched her with kisses, making her stop crying for a bit
"Amor, I think her teeth is hurting, can you please bring me her ice? I'll try to change her really quick" You asked Pedri leaning up to kiss his cheek, your hand softly going underneath his white shirt to touch the warm skin of his back
"Sure, bonita" He said turning to kiss your forehead before Amanda started crying again
He went downstairs to the fridge where you kept the ice for her growing teeths, your brother told you she could get a bit of fever if her teeth started aching her but nothing too much and that ice helped her a lot.
When he returned, he saw you dressing her up and lifting her up to your waist while singing to her
"En mi carita redondita, tengo ojos y nariz" (In my little round face, I have eyes and a nose) You smiled wide as Amanda smiled back at you "Y también una boquita, para cantar y reír. Con mis ojos, veo todo; con mi nariz hago ¡achi! Con mi boca, como y como, palomitas de maíz" (And also a little mouth, to sing and laugh. With my eyes, I see everything; with my nose I do achi! With my mouth, I eat and eat, popcorn)
You were a natural with her. Your way of acting came off as if you already have kids but it was just your motherly insticts on and as soon as Pedri saw that moment between you and your niece, he couldn't help but imagine... if you were the sweetest with her, how would you be with one of your own?
He knew that he wanted you for the rest of his life and you have talked about it. Wedding, house together, kids, dogs, domestic life, everything but now he got a glimpse of your life with a kid in it.
He imagined how gorgeous you'd look with your round belly and how gorgeous you'd look while breastfeeding. He wanted it.
And while precisely wasn't the time, he couldn't help but think of when the time was right. And it didn't helped that seeing you with your niece made those thoughts of his go crazy.
He couldn't help but walk over and wrap his arms around you before giving the ice to Amanda who grabbed it and pulled it up to her teeth
"¿Todo bien, guapo?" (Everything good, handsome?)
He hums pulling his chin into your shoulder "You look good. Te quiero mucho" He said as you smiled resting your head in his
"Love you too" You felt him kissing your cheek, you stayed quiet as Amanda softly babbled and due to the softly swinging side to side was getting sleepy "Is something going on you'd like to tell me?" You whisper softly.
You just knew him too well
"I know it's not our time but I can't wait for our turn to be parents. You're just so natural"
"You are not left behind, Pepi. Don't think I haven't noticed the way she eats with you and how you watch her series with her"
"Paw Patrol is nice tho" You both giggle "But I really can't wait for it"
"One day, amor" You say feeling his kisses to your cheek "One day"
°°° °°° °°° °°°
Taglist: @gaviymarcsbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld @http-isabela
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hannyoontify · 1 year ago
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april showers bring may flowers - choi seungcheol
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member | seungcheol x gn!reader
genre | hurt with lots of comfort, fluff??, established relationship!au,
word count | 2k
synopsis | when that time of year rolls around, seungcheol is reminded yet again why he loves you so much
warnings | mentions of death of unnamed character, lots of crying, mentions of breakfast, a couple kisses, cheol is grieving a lot
notes | do yourself a favor and DON'T listen to dk's cover of betelgeuse while you read this bc writing this while listening to that on repeat did smth to my heart
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Seungcheol can hear you shuffling around in the kitchen from his bedroom, most likely preparing breakfast for him and the thought alone made his chest tighten. He knew that today wasn't any easier for you than it was for him, but the way you always put him first and prioritized his needs made him feel guilty but also grateful at the same time.
Laying an arm over his eyes, Seungcheol tried to ignore the dull, throbbing pain in his chest as he thought over what the day's itinerary would look like. He would eat breakfast, then get changed. You would then drive the two of you to the– Seungcheol could feel his throat closing up as he choked back an audible sob. Just thinking about visiting him was too much to bear. He heard your footsteps heading towards his bedroom and Seungcheol wiped his tears away in a hurry–just as you quietly entered his room.
"Cheol? You awake?" You asked in a soft voice. Seungcheol heard you padding over to his side of the bed, and he glanced at you with misty eyes. You were wearing a plain white top and beige pants. Bright, just like he had requested.
Seungcheol felt his lower lip quiver and immediately noticing this, you cupped his face with your soft hands and wiped away his tears that were now flowing like a steady stream, leaving a wet trail on his cheeks. Seungcheol let himself cry into your arms, his mouth crying bitterly into your shoulder as he gripped your arms tightly. You simply sat there, alternating between rubbing small circles and patting his back. Your own eyes welled up with tears as you heard your fiance sob and you tried your best to blink them away, but a single tear managed to escape and rolled down your cheek.
Once Seungcheol managed to calm down a bit, you brought his face up so you could look into his eyes. They were bloodshot and glossy, glinting and glistening in the dim light of the distant living room. In a different context, you would've described his eyes as shining and full of youth, but there was an unspoken sadness hiding under the brightness that made you think otherwise.
"I think this is gonna happen a lot today," Seungcheol mumbled. That made both of you crack a small smile and you pressed a light kiss to his forehead.
"That's why I brought four extra boxes of tissues with me. Don't worry, I'll catch every tear that falls today," You said with a quiet chuckle. "Come outside once you're ready, I made breakfast."
Seuncheol muttered out a small 'thank you' and watched you leave the room first. He had no doubt that you would catch every one of his tears. You've been doing exactly that for the past five years, ever since the accident.
The two of you were only a couple weeks into a new relationship when the sudden news of his best friend's death sent Seungcheol's life into a downward spiral. Anyone else would've been overwhelmed with the situation and asked to end things, especially since you had only met him recently, but not you. You were more determined than before to stay by his side and lend him a shoulder to cry on, should he ever need one. You became his pillar of support and Seungcheol doesn't know where he would be in life right now if you hadn't stayed with him.
Watching you from behind, he felt another pang of guilt in his chest. You were so perfect, why would you choose to stay with a mess like him? He was lacking in so many ways-
"Cheol, my love?" You called out.
"Yeah?"
"No need to feel guilty, okay? I'm doing what I'm doing because I love you," It was almost as if you read his mind. You sent him a reassuring smile. "I made a choice to stay with you all those years ago and I'm not backing out of my promise. Not today, not ever. Okay?"
Seungcheol could feel another wave of tears welling up in his eyes, and he wiped them away with the back of his hand. "Okay. I love you."
"I love you too."
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The car ride to the graveyard was mostly quiet with the exception of a few strings of curse words that would leave your mouth whenever there was an 'idiot driver who probably peaked in high school'. That helped bring a small smile to Seungcheol's lips.
Once the two of you found the specific grave mound that belonged to Seungcheol's best friend, you wrapped a strong arm around his shoulder as he stared at the mound of grass that held the body of his friend of almost 25 years.
A violent sob racked through Seungcheol's body when he saw a fresh bouquet of lilies that he recognized as Soonyoung's. He must've visited earlier.
When Seungcheol's legs gave out under him, you helped soften his fall as you went down with him. Your arms remained firm around him as he cried into your shoulder, his quiet sobs speaking volumes of the pain that he was feeling. Your love clung onto you, holding you so tightly like you would also disappear if he let go for just one second.
You rubbed small circles on Seungcheol's back as you made soft noises to soothe him, your chin resting on the crown of his head. Once you thought he had calmed down a bit, you opened your mouth to speak.
"He would be so proud of you, you know. So proud of how far you've come in life. You might be crying but I'm sure he's smiling down on us right now," You mumble. You could feel Seungcheol trembling in your embrace and you resume making soothing noises.
"He spoke so highly of you before we met, I thought he might've been the one with a crush on you," You chuckled, reminiscing how your favorite senior was so ecstatic to set up his best friend with his favorite underclassman. "He really cared for you, my love. He cared for you so much."
Your fiance's cries only got louder. He wailed into your shoulder, the entire area now damp from his tears. Seungcheol silently cursed the universe, he cursed any and every deity in existence for taking his best friend from him. Oh, the things he would do to bring him back. He was willing to spend every penny of his life savings on his medical bills if it meant that he could be ablive. Seungcheol would've done anything and everything if he knew that he would lose his best friend in a matter of months.
You watched a lone tear drip down his cheek and drop to the grass below you, and you were reminded of something you told him five years ago.
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"I need to stop crying," Seungcheol whispered to you. Almost everyone had left after the burial, heading back to the funeral home where dinner was to be served. You shook your head and patted his back. "At this rate, I'm gonna flood this place with my tears."
You cracked a small smile at his joke and pressed a kiss to his temple. "You can cry all you want. You can flood this place with your tears because you know what they say, right? April showers bring May flowers. The tears you shed now are gonna have beautiful flowers blooming in its stead because this too, shall pass. It may seem like everything is doomed and your life will never get better, but I promise you, everything does get better. After a long period of adversity and hardship, good things will always follow. And I'll stay with you through it all.
"I promise."
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You knew it was okay to move when Seungcheol let out a shaky breath, one that usually signified that he was either done crying or ran out of tears to cry. Once he pulled away, he began apologizing profusely because his tears had soaked entirely through the fabric of your white shirt on your shoulder but you simply laughed.
You fixed his bangs with a warm smile and pressed a kiss to his lips. "I'm gonna go clean the other graves, you go ahead and talk with him."
Seungcheol felt his heart physically ache. This was one of the many reasons why he loved you so much. You were here to grieve, on his behalf, but here you were, cleaning and weeding the graves of strangers. When he asked you once why you always cleaned the graves of people you didn't know, your answer was his deciding factor for proposing to you (indirectly, he didn't ask you to marry him at a graveyard like soonyoung thought he did when cheol initially told him)
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"Why do you clean the graves of strangers?" Seungcheol asked. The two of you were sitting on the grass, drinking makgeolli and watching the sun set behind Seoul. You looked over at him with a confused expression that said 'What do you mean?'
"I mean like- I don't know, I think it's just so... selfless. Like we're here to grieve, cleaning other's graves is the last thing on my mind if I'm being honest," Your then-boyfriend winced at his own words. "I sound horrible."
You couldn't help but laugh. "No, you don't sound horrible. It makes sense why you would think that way. Everyone's here because they have a reason to, I don't think anyone visits graveyards for funsies." Seungcheol nodded at that. "But if I don't, who will? The only thing the landowner does is mow the grass every other week. I think they deserve more than that.
"Especially the graves who no longer receive visitors. Their families may be living too far away or they don't have any family members or acquaintances to remember them and visit them. I think something as simple as weeding their area and pouring them leftover alcohol would mean a lot to them."
You shuffled in your spot to turn and face your lover. He looked at you with bright eyes that were slightly puffy from all the crying earlier that day. "Imagine this. You're living abroad for whatever reason, so you haven't been able to visit his grave for years. You feel so sorry because you can't take care of it like you used to, but one day, you return and see that the grave is still in a pristine condition, almost the same way you left it all those years ago. How would that make you feel?"
Seungcheol slowly nodded, as if he began to slowly understand what you meant. "I would be happy. And grateful. Because his grave wasn't neglected while I was gone."
You nodded back at him, happy that he understood. "That's why I clean other's graves. In case a situation like that were ever to happen. Through a small action like brushing away dead leaves, I could bring a smile to someone else's face."
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Watching you in the distance, Seungcheol began to talk to his old friend. He gave him the latest updates on the happenings of the friend group, as well as his recent promotion. His eyes never let your frame as he talked, observing as you bent over to pull out a few weeds that you had spotted.
"We're getting married, you idiot," He said with a soft smile. "Thanks for introducing me to the love of my life. I really owe you one. I was gonna have you be the best man, but I guess I'm gonna have to stick with Soonyoung. [Name] is-"
Seungcheol's words got caught in his throat when he saw you waving over at him with the brightest smile on your face and a couple wildflowers in hand. The wind blew your hair past your face, whipping it around dramatically. You looked so beautiful like this, full of love and smiles. He couldn't believe he was the one to call you his, forever.
"They're the best thing that's ever happened to me."
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reblogs and feedback is always appreciated ^-^
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nanamis-bigtie · 1 year ago
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nonsexual acts of intimacy ↬ reacting to the other one crying about something
❧ kusakabe atsuya x gn!reader | cw: pre-relationship, mutual pinning, story takes part in a bar setting but there's no mention of alcohol ❧
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It's been more of instinct than a conscious decision, Kusakabe must admit as he's lingering behind the door, hand clenched on the handle. He sprinted to his feet right behind you and followed—but now, once he knows why you left the party so suddenly, his confidence popped like a balloon and faded.
Part of him is glad it's not sickness, part gnaws on his conscience and thrashes his mind from the inside. What is he doing here? He's never been good with crying people; he should turn back and call Nanami or Iori… Does he even have tissues on himself?
But the sight of your slumped back and curled shoulders, shaking in that characteristic rhythm of sobbing, clenches his heart with pain almost dragging a cry out of him too. It should be his chest you should hide your face in, not your hands, out there in the cold, leaning over the railing in front of a bar.
Maybe if he wasn't such a coward and finally pushed the matters further than courteous coffee and snack dates after work—
Kusakabe scratches the back of his head and gnaws on a profanity pressing to his tongue. If he did A, there needs to be B, or else he won't be able to call himself a man anymore.
"Okay there, Y/N?" He tries to sound casual, peeking through the open door, his coat thrown over his arm at ready. It's just a smoking break, not a rescue mission, and it doesn't matter that he quit smoking two years ago. 
You jolt in place, wipe your eyes with both hands at once, your lips trembling slightly as you try to pull a smile, "Yeah, all good. Just needed fresh air."
Horrible liars, both of you.
He leans over the railing, close to you but keeping the distance suit for a coworker. 
"You sure you don't need to call it a day?" Trying to push through awkward silence, he observes you with the very corner of his eye. Not obviously staring, just casually monitoring the situation, like a good colleague should, right? "I can call a taxi—"
"I'm okay." At least your voice doesn't tremble anymore. "It's been… A rough week. Just needed to cry some. Five more minutes and I'll be back." 
You don't have any coat on, Kusakabe realizes and almost slaps himself for not doing so sooner. He should have grabbed yours, not his, if he really wanted to be useful. What is he going to do now, stay there with you awkwardly and dressed or return to the warmth, leaving you alone midst cursed December?
Just a coworker wouldn't—
"Here." He wraps his coat around your shoulders, his heart fluttering when your gazes meet. For a mere few seconds, he can't feel the cold anymore and the noise of the bar behind your backs seems as sweet as a rippling stream.
"And you—" You accept the offering and clench your hands on its skirts. Even if he were about to freeze, he would have no heart to take it back from you, no matter what you say.
"I just need one thing." Praying his hands don't tremble as much as he thinks they do, Kusakabe reaches into one of the pockets, soon fishing a lollipop out of it. "Here, for you."
He taps your nose with it, a stupid, childish impulse—but for the first time tonight you smile for real, soon even laugh a little, "Thanks. Thanks a lot. For checking on me and���everything. Thanks, Atsuya."
A second earlier he thought the sound of your laughter was the prettiest sound he'd ever heard. Oh, how wrong he was.
Even your laughter couldn't compare to the way you say his name.
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a/n: I'll die on the hill that Kusakabe's iconic lollipop is a remain of smoking addiction. big thank you to my server peeps for support with my first time at trying writing him & to @clumsyraccoon and @lemonszesty whose Kusakabe writing served as inspo to reach for his drabble out of order! EDIT: it's been brought to my attention that Kusakabe's antismoking lollipop is canon via databook. I'll leave the og note cause the coincidence is just funny lol
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Remember Me Dancing
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Summary: When Y/N is struck by a wave of sadness, and missing her mom all over again, Jensen and Jared step up to turn her memories happy again.
Warnings: Nothing really. All fluff. Talk of grief and loss.
Pairings: No romantic pairing. Jensen Ackles x teen!reader, Jared Padalecki x teen!reader
Word Count: 1,204
A/N: I got a request that I'll leave as anonymous (just in case) that said this:
Hey I have a huge request. I was wondering if you could do a Jensen x teen!reader or a J2 x Teen!reader where the reader thinks of her mom that passed away and she hears a song play that her mom loved and she starts crying and can’t stop so she gets help by the guys and they calm her down. She then eventually tells them what’s wrong and they take care of her for the rest of the night. Today a song played and it made me think of my mom and I honestly needed comfort and wished it was them two. Thank you!❤️
This took me much longer than it should have and I'm sorry you had to wait a little while, hon. But I hope this story gives you a bit of peace and a smile. Sending you lots of love and healing.
A/N 2: As always, of course, this is a Jensen (and Jared) from a different part of the multiverse. This is a complete and utter work of fiction.
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Y/N was doing better. Much better. She reminded herself of that fact as she sat in her trailer with tears pouring down her cheeks.
A light rap on her door had her swiping away the tears quickly. But not quick enough as Jensen opened the door and stuck his head inside.
“Hey sweetheart they're…” His voice softened. “waiting for us.”
He came all the way in, closing the door softly and moving to sit beside her on the small couch. “Baby, what's wrong?”
Y/N shook her head. “Nothing.” She said unconvincingly.
Jensen used his knuckle to brush away the latest tear to fall. “This isn't nothing.” He said gently.
Y/N shrugged and swiped her tears away with both hands this time. “Ugh, it's so stupid. I'm really fine.”
Jensen stayed quiet, just waiting. Finally, Y/N sighed. 
“I was just listening to music, waiting for the call to hair and makeup.” She said, raising her phone in her hands to show Spotify open on the screen. “And then this song came on that…well mom loved it, and she used to dance around the apartment to it.” 
A sad, fond smile took over her face. “I used to tease her so much, called her a dork. But she'd always pull me into her dorky dancing and I loved it.” 
She took a shuddery breath and closed her eyes. A tear fell from beneath her lashes. “What I wouldn't give to have one more dance party with her.”
Jensen pulled her to his chest and rubbed circles into her back while she cried. After a few minutes she sat up, wiping the damp patch her tears had left on Jensen's t-shirt. 
“Sorry.” She said in a wavering voice. Jensen just waved away her apology as she reached past him for a tissue and blew her nose.
“You know,” she continued as she sniffled, “I really am doing much better these days. It's just sometimes something like this will hit me and it's like…” She lifted her hand as though trying to reach for the words.
Jensen supplied them for her. “Like the grief hits you brand new, and it's as though no time has passed at all.” 
Y/N nodded. “Yeah.” She whispered. 
Jensen brushed her hair behind her ear. “Grief, loss, they're like that. I get it, kiddo. And everyone else will too. If you want to take off, I can drive you home.”
But Y/N shook her head. “No, I think I'd like to go do my job, you know, escape being me. Just for a little while.”
Jensen nodded. “Then after work, I have an idea.”
Y/N smiled. “What's the idea?”
“You'll see when we're finished work.”
Y/N wanted more information, but there was suddenly another knock and a P.A. called to her through the door. 
“Y/N, sweetie, they're ready for you in hair and makeup.”
In the end it was the anticipation that really distracted her from the sadness that sat in her chest. Because, as they went through the day, no matter how much she prodded, she couldn't get Jensen to spill the details about his plans.
Finally, after more than twelve hours, they were finished and Jensen drove her home. He followed her up to her apartment and as soon as they walked inside Y/N jumped almost a foot, as Jared spun around to face them.
“Hey darlin’! Surprise!” He said loudly, arms thrown wide. “Welcome to the dance party.” He pressed a button on his phone and music started playing out of Bluetooth speakers she definitely didn't own.
She laughed in complete surprise. Jared hadn't been on the call sheet for the day, so obviously Jensen had told him to come and set all of this up. The whole apartment had been turned into a kind of seventies disco, complete with strobe lights and a mirrorball. 
Y/N turned to Jensen, beaming, with tears brimming once again.
He pulled her into a hug. “I thought if we dance-partied hard enough, we could make some new memories to help cushion the old ones, turn them back into happy ones again. So you can remember her dancing, and smile”
Y/N just nodded, overwhelmed by her gratitude for these two wonderful men..
“Hey!” Jared complained. ”I'm the one who set this all up! Where's my hug?” Then without waiting for an answer, he wrapped his long arms around them both, catching her in the middle of them and squishing her flat between his chest and Jensen's.
Jensen groaned. “Dude. Yes, thank you! Now let the girl breathe!”
Jared pulled away with a huge grin and pounded Jensen on the back with the kind of vigor only the other big Texan could handle. Then he leaned down and kissed the top of Y/N's head incredibly gently. 
“We love you, baby.”
Y/N nodded. “I know. I love you too. And thank you.” She smiled and dashed away the last of her tears. “Let the party begin!”
Before long, more of the cast and crew knocked on her door, asking if this was where the dance party was happening. Ruthie, Rob, Mark, Felicia, and so many more friends all crammed into her relatively small apartment.
They danced and ate, and talked, and then ate some more. Everything ran smoothly, with food simply showing up at the door whenever people got hungry. One corner of the apartment was dedicated to board games and card games and friendly competition ruled the day - no one was immune.
But more than anything, they danced. Some were great dancers, some terrible, but talent didn’t matter, only fun. Y/N couldn't imagine how much energy Jared had put into planning the whole evening. It was incredible.
Eventually, hours later, Y/N sat down on her couch, and shut her eyes, just for a moment. But soon the lullaby of laughter and friendly conversation sang her into a light doze which quickly turned into a deep sleep. She only woke up a long time later, as the last guest left and the music was turned down but not off. The party lights were gone and the only light now was that of a soft lamp in the corner. She woke as Jensen was bending over her to scoop her into his arms and carry her to her bedroom.
“I fell asleep.” Y/N said, stating the obvious and burrowing her cheek into Jensen's shoulder. “Why'd you let me?” 
She let out a huge, sleepy yawn and Jensen chuckled. 
“That's why.” He said simply.
Y/N wanted to argue, but he laid her down in her bed and tucked the comforter around her and her words faded away. He kissed her forehead and squeezed her hand. 
“Sleep well, sweetheart. Jared and I will be here tomorrow morning to take you for breakfast.”
Y/N nodded and mumbled something and Jensen laughed again. “I'll text you about it, cause you're sleeping and won’t remember.”
Y/N wanted to disagree with him, but she was already asleep, her dreams mixing together old dancing and new into a happy tangle of good memories.
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@stoneyggirl2 @fanfic-n-tabulous @traiitorjoe @b3autyfuld1sast3r
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harlowhockeystick · 7 months ago
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22- So High School with Princess and Nolan pleeeeeeeaase 🫶🏻
"you knew what you wanted, and boy you got her" | poetic prompts | warnings: anxiety, panic attacks, chaos, weddings
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it was everything they could imagine, even though it was the most stressful day of their life.
the wedding day had finally approached. after almost five years of dating, a year of being engaged, the day arrived. typical wedding day jitters fell upon both parties, the usual last minute thoughts and touch ups, nothing prepared either of them for the massive chaotic crowd that was waiting outside the venue.
even though the bridal party did their best to keep it away from y/n, she knew that the flowers hadn't been delivered, the photographer was an hour late, and the shuttle was also late. as a group they decided to push the wedding back at least an hour to make room for adjustments. but nothing, absolutely nothing, was going to stop her from getting married today.
not even a nervous groom.
"y/n, i need to talk with you for a second." her maid of honor whispered in her ear. she was about to get in her dress, hair and makeup done and set, ready for pictures when the photographer would arrive. stepping to the side in her silk robe and slippers, she felt her stomach drop. god, what now?
"no bullshit. i know we're all done with that today, but you need to talk to nolan. travis texted me saying he is having a panic attack and won't come out of the bathroom. all of this massive chaos is probably freaking him out too," y/n was handed a tissue when she felt tears well up in her eyes, "no no, no crying, it'll all be okay. i'll go with you?"
"no, i can do it. when the photographer gets here y'all go ahead and take pictures and just wait for me."
walking across the venue and where the guys were getting ready, she knocked on the door and was greeted by travis. she made sure all the guys left before talking to nolan. it was like his soul knew she was there before she spoke. a few seconds before she knocked on the door he felt his breathing steady out.
"nolie it's me, please open the door. nobody else is here, just you and me." she softly spoke. he got up, leaning his forehead against the wooden door with a soft thud.
"it's bad luck to see each other before the wedding," his thick accent present in how he spoke, sniffling after he finished. he heard her giggle and slide her slippers across the wooden floor.
"we've had enough bad luck today, so i think we're gonna be okay." he unlocked the door then leaned against the wall, waiting for her to open it. her heart softened when she opened the door, noticed that he'd been crying a lot with tear tracks down his cheeks. his shirt was unbuttoned and his hair was messy. "oh baby," she placed her hand on his cheek, wiping another tear away.
"'m sorry, princess." he took in a sharp breath before letting out another cry. "i just got really nervous, y'know? i mean what if i'm not a good husband? i don't want you to get sick of me and...and leave."
she tucks a lock of loose hair behind his ear, grabbing a tissue from the counter and wiping his cheeks and nose for him. "if i was gonna get sick of you, i would have left by now." she kisses his forehead softly, "remember when we went on our first date? you were so confident, and it was really hot." nolan chuckled, "and when you came to the shop like ten times that next week? you knew what you wanted, and you got her. you got me, and i'm not going anywhere. i'm gonna be your wife, you're gonna be my husband, and we're gonna have a happily ever after together."
nolan places a hand on her cheek as she spoke, a smile on his lips and this time, happy tears filling his eyes. they share a sweet and emotional kiss, one she hopes to recreate in an hour at the altar. they pull apart and she helps nolan fix his tie and to get rid of some of the tear tracks on his cheeks.
"alright, nothing is stopping me from getting married to you today." nolan laughs with his head thrown back, "i'll see you in an hour," she walks to the door of the groomsmen suite, "i'll be the one in a pretty white dress." nolan kissed her on the cheek.
"i'll be the one waiting for you at the altar, princess."
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guppygiggles · 7 months ago
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(sad/comfort, tickling)
Hey, there you are! I've been looking for you all day! What are you up to, friend?
Oh, no... What's wrong?
Oh, honey... my poor little peach... come here.
There, there... it's okay... I'll just hold you for a minute and rub your back. You don't have to say anything, okay? Shh, shh... you're safe now, I've got you. That's it... just let it all out, sweetheart. This world is so hard on soft things like you, it just isn't fair... oh, that I could take this pain away from you, I'd do it in a heartbeat...
Here, let me dab your face with this... does the cold feel better? Yeah, I bet... you are so flushed, just look at your poor cheeks... let's get your forehead and your neck, too... oh, honey, you're crying again... here, blow into this tissue. Oh, hush, I've seen worse! Just blow. There you go... feel better? Good... let's dab your red nose, too... there, now. You're already starting to look a bit better, do you feel better at all? Oh, I'm so, so glad.
Here, take a sip of this water. That was a big cry you just had, so you need to rehydrate, okay? If you don't want this, I could make you soup, or get you a gatorade instead, or... oh... you look sleepy, now. Are you getting a bit sleepy? That's what I thought... not surprising, really, after the day you just had. Hey, don't apologize! You can absolutely sleep here, I don't mind one bit. Here, let's get you more comfortable.
I hope my couch is comfy for you... you can lean against me if you want, I'll wrap this blanket around us. Oh, you're not quite ready to fall asleep, yet? Well, that's alright! Why don't we put on your favorite movie, and you can drift off when you're ready? No no, don't get up... I have it downloaded already, I'll just get it started for you. Hehe, I actually haven't seen this one in a while... I'm happy that we're watching it together.
You keep squirming... Are you uncomfortable? You... want to get closer? Well, of course you can! Here, there's plenty of room for us to lay down... Oh, pff, are you kidding? I love to cuddle! Let's put this pillow under your head, and you can just scoot back against me, there you go...
...!
Oh, no, did I hurt you? I didn't mean to nudge you so hard. That was a pretty loud squeak, are you alright?
...Whew, I'm so glad... I would feel just terrible if I hurt you. Are you just sensitive right there, or something?
Hm...? I can barely hear you, can you speak up, please?
Wait a minute...
You're not... ticklish, are you?
Ohoho, I see... so, if I just... tickle your tummy, right here, that doesn't tickle?
...
Ehehehe! Awww, your laugh is so cute! Are you embarrassed about being ticklish, is that why you didn't tell me? It's nothing to be shy about, you know... it's pretty adorable.
...
Ohhhh... I think I'm catching on, now... well, in that case... let's see, what other spots should we test out? How about right here, on your side? People with ticklish tummies usually have ticklish sides, too... and it sounds like you're no exception, hehehe! I guess you didn't know I moonlight as a tickle monster, hm? Too late to run, now! Tickle, tickle, tickle! Awww, you have the sweetest laugh when you're being tickled! What about your ribs, I wonder?
...
Ticklish here, too? Goodness! You're just ticklish all over, huh?
Uh oh~ not here...? Not right heeeeeere, under your arms? Hehe, oh, but everybody likes it right here! Tickle, tickle! Wow, I didn't know you could laugh like that! Is this your worst spot~? Your special tickle spot? Oh, gosh, look how red you're turning! You poor thing, so blushy and ticklish... god, you're so cute. Alright, alright, I'll give you a break, now. Don't think I'm not gonna find your other spots, later, though...! Hehehehe~
Here's some water... I bet you're winded after all that laughing. Oooh, you look very sleepy now, too... are you? Oh, good... you really need to rest. I'll pull the blanket back over you... that's it. Just take deep breaths, now... don't you worry about a thing, sweetheart. You are so safe and loved, here... I won't let anything happen to you. Just rest your sweet head, close your eyes...
Goodnight, peach. 💙
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whatdoeseverybodywant · 1 year ago
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All I Want Is You- Part 2
Jey Uso x Ex-Girlfriend Reader
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I do NOT give permission for my work to be translated or reposted on here or any other site, even if you give me credit. DO NOT REPOST MY FICS
Reblogs, comments, likes, and feedback ALWAYS appreciated ❤ 
Janelle is played by Justine Skye
Taglist: @christinabae @southerngirl41 @reci24 @jeyusos-girl @jeyusosgirl @melaninsugababy @baconeggndcheez @bemybabiibish @jstarr86 @nbanenefrmdao @purplehairgawdess
Part 1
Saturday August 5th
“Trin it was awful, he basically compared me to Xavi’s mom” Janelle sighed. As she flopped back onto the bed. She had called Trinity as soon as she woke up to tell her what happened last night.  
“Can you blame him?” When Janelle didn’t say anything Trinity continued. “I mean you left just like she  did. And You didn’t see the fallout of you leaving. I’ve never seen X so sad before. I’m not saying this to make you feel bad neither Nelle but, for a year straight you were his maternal figure. All he knew was you and Josh aka mom and dad.” 
Janelle sighed,  she knew she hurt Xavier and Josh by walking out on them but it was for the best. 
“Trin, I wasn’t ready for all of that.” She wished she could've stayed on Raw and none of yesterday would’ve happened. Trinity scoffed over the phone. 
“Janelle, you fell into the role so easily though. I’m your best friend, you can tell me anything..” Trinity said she knew Janelle was lying about not being ready. When Janelle just repeated that she wasn’t ready Trinity scoffed again. “Bullshit. Tell me what was going on.” 
“Fine! I felt suffocated, felt like I couldn’t breathe. We fell into a routine of taking care of Xavi and I got scared.” 
“Scared of what?” Trinity said softly. “Janelle what’s going on?”  Trinity listened as her friend cried on the phone. “I wish I was there with you Nelly. Please don’t cry.”  Janelle went to get some tissue to wipe her nose. 
“I wish you were here too Trinny. This honestly sucks.” They talked some more before Janelle made up an excuse to get off the phone.
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Backstage of Summerslam was buzzing, there were people everywhere. Both rosters, some people from NXT and a whole bunch of legends were in the building but when she heard Xavier call her name, all the other noise stopped and she focused her attention on him. 
 “Nelly! You like my face paint?!” Janelle smiled and walked closer to him. She was expecting to see him with Josh but he wasn’t, he was with Josh’s cousin. They greeted each other with friendly smiles. Janelle had met her a couple of times, when she and Josh were dating. 
“I love it.” Janelle said. Josh’s cousin had a smile on her face, watching the two of them interact. She was very confused when Josh told her that he and Janelle had broken up. She honestly thought that they would be engaged by now. She knew about the ring that he had bought a couple of weeks before Janelle left him. 
“I’m going to watch my daddy fights  uncle Jo-Jo and I’m going to be in the fronts row,” Janelle gasped. 
“Really? Wow, you're so lucky.” She said.
“Can you come watch daddy with us?” Janelle shook her head. 
“ I can’t bud. I have to work.” She said, Xavier pouted at her and muttered ‘okay.’ 
“Come on Xavi, we gotta go or we’re gonna miss your dads entrance.”  Xavier nodded and waved bye to Janelle as they walked away. 
“Wait!.” He yelled out rushing back over to Janelle. “You didn’t give me good luck kisses.” She tilted her head and looked at him.  “You give my daddy good luck kisses, but he not here. So I'll take them.” He said, smiling at her. He was a smooth talker just like his dad. 
Janelle chuckled. “Ok fine.”  She kissed both his cheeks, mindful of the facepaint then placed a kiss on his forehead. Josh’s cousin let out an ‘aww’ it was obvious that Janelle had love for Xavier.
Janelle placed one more kiss on Xavier’s forehead, letting him place one on her’s before letting him run back over to Lena. 
“Love you Nelly!” He yelled out behind him. 
“Love you too Xavier!”  She smiled as she watched him walk away. She felt like such a jackass for leaving him, but it was better this way. 
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Janelle arrived at the hotel after SummerSlam later than she would’ve liked. She had spent 2 more extra hours at the arena filming and editing content. She stopped walking when she heard somebody call her name. 
“Ms Porter?” She turned to look at the worker behind the desk. 
“Yes?” She asked slightly confused, 
“Someone left these here for you.” The employee said, handing Janelle a big bouquet of roses and two envelopes. 
“Oh wow.” Janelle said in awe. “They’re beautiful.” 
The employee smiled at her. “Yes they are ma’am. Whoever got you these is in love with you” There were only a handful of people that knew she was staying at this hotel and none of them she was involved with romantically. Her heart started to pound in her chest when Josh flashed through her mind. She shook her head causing the employee to look at her weirdly before walking away to help another guest. 
Janelle took the flowers and went over to the elevator. Once she got in her room she set the flowers down on the table and sat down on the bed to read the cards. Opening one of the envelopes, she let out a gasp when she pulled out a picture of her and Xavier. Josh had taken it. She knew it was one of the ones he kept in his wallet because of all the bends in it. 
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In the other envelope was a folded piece of paper. Opening it, she felt her eyes start to water as she read it. 
For 24 hours all i've been thinking about is you. Even during my match with Joe. Pathetic right? I can’t get you out of my head J. I keep looking at this picture of you and Xavi and i’m still so fucking confused, why did you leave? We were happy. I was happy. Xavier was happy and if you weren’t happy why didn’t you say anything. I’m sorry if I was pressuring you into starting a family. I just love you Janelle. I wanted ,   want  to spend the rest of my life with you. Tell me what I can do to fix this so you can come home. - Joshua 
 Janelle was full on crying now. It wasn’t that she wasn’t happy with Josh and Xavier, she was very happy being there with them and that was the whole point.
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Josh sighed as he sat on the couch, finally able to put and overly excited Xavier to sleep. He looked over at his brother when he sat down next to him. 
“You alright Uce?”  Josh just shrugged. He honestly didn’t know how to feel right now. He wanted to be with Janelle. He wanted a family with Janelle. But even from their talk yesterday, it was obvious that wasn’t what she wanted. He didn’t know why he sent the note and the picture to Janelle. The flowers were from Xavier, but Josh saw an opportunity to get what he wanted to say off his chest.  
“I’m stuck, man.” He finally said. “It’s so fuckin’ obvious that she doesn’t want to be with me. But I can’t move on. Man seeing her yesterday just brought back all them feelings that I had locked away.” 
Jon felt bad for his twin. Honestly their whole family felt bad for him, everyone thought that Janelle was the one for Josh. 
“Man, listen Uce. You gotta think about that little boy in there. He’s involved in this just as much as you and Janelle.” Josh nodded his head. 
“I know. I keep thinking about our conversation yesterday and It doesn’t make any sense. She kept saying that she wasn’t ready. But she would get up when X had nightmares, she would be the one to read him bedtime stories. She would be the one to do bathtime. So what the fuck. I never asked her to do any of that. She did that shit on her own.” He said, slightly raising his voice towards the end. 
“Well, she called Trin earlier. “ Jon sighed. “She told Trin that she was starting to feel suffocated, and that she was scared..”  
Josh looked over at his brother. “Scared of what?” Jon just shrugged. 
“She didn’t say.” 
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August 8th
Janelle let out a shaky breath as she pulled up in front of her old house. She spent 2 days re-reading his letter to her. She needed him to understand why she left. Wiping her palms on her pants she exited her car and walked up the steps to the front door. 
Josh’s face was full of shock when he opened the door. She gave him a small smile and cleared her throat. 
“Can I come in?”  She asked, walking in when he moved to the side. She stood in the foyer awkwardly. She looked around noticing that he never removed the picture of him, her and Xavier from the end table. She followed him to the living room. Sitting in one of the chairs across from the couch he was sitting on. 
He still didn’t say anything. He was just watching her as she looked around, seeing what he changed since she moved out. 
“You want something to drink?” He asked, she shook her head no. “Okay, so whatchu’; doin here?” She wiped her hand on her pants again, clearing her throat. 
“I wanted to talk to you. I got your note and flowers. Thank you.” He just shrugged. 
“The flowers were from Xavier. He saw them and said we had to get them for you.” She smiled at that. Speaking of Xavier, it was too quiet.
“Where is he?” She asked. 
“Pops is in town, took him out for a bit.”  She nodded.  “What do you wanna talk about?” He asked, sitting back on the couch. 
“Trinity told me that she told Jon who told you what I said to her on the phone. When I said I felt like I was being suffocated. It had nothing to do with you or Xavier. It was everything to do with me and my own selfish reasons.”  
“What reasons? Help me understand Janelle”  She groaned and closed her eyes. 
“Josh, I wanted to go out and have fun too. I missed out on so much because I was here with you guys. 
“I never asked you to miss out on stuff.” He said cutting her off. “If you wanted to go out you should’ve just went out! Nobody was stopping you” She was pissing him off and not making any sense. 
“That's the point Josh!” She said yelling and standing up from the chair. “Nobody was stopping me. I have free range to do what the hell I wanted to. But I wanted to be here with Xavier. I wanted to give him baths. I wanted to read him bedtime stories. I wanted to do all of that.”  She yelled, wiping her tears. “I had to leave Josh. When I came to the realization that I loved Xavier like he was my own and that I wouldn't mind having kids with you I had to leave!” She was pacing back and forth now. 
He was more confused now than he ever was. 
“Why did you have to leave?”  When she didn’t respond he jumped up off the couch and stood in front of her, stopping her pacing. He grabbed her shoulders and shook her. “Fucking talk to me Janelle. What do you mean you had to leave.” 
“I didn’t want to be like my mom!” She finally shouted. “I didn’t want to wake up one morning hating you, or Xavier or any of our children, if we had any. I figured it’ll be better for me to just leave” Josh cupped her face and wiped away her tears. 
Everything sort of made sense to Josh now. She had confided in him about everything her mom had put her through when she was younger. All the mental abuse Janelle had to go through until she graduated high school and went off to college. 
“Janelle, you’re nothing like your mom. Nelle the love that you show for Xavier is crazy. You remember that time you almost beat that kid mom's ass because her son was picking on Xavier?” She laughed and nodded. “That right there should show you that you are better than your mom.” 
“But-” He cut her off. 
“But nothing. You are better than your mom. Way better. Whatever thoughts you had we could’ve talked them out instead of you leaving.” 
“I honestly thought I wasn’t ready for that. But seeing him again the other day made me realise how fuckin stupid I was being. I’m sorry” 
He nodded. “I know you are. But it’s ain't me you gotta apologize to, it's Xavi. He cried for days when you left.” Janelle felt her bottom lip start to quiver. She felt so bad for leaving Xavier the way she did.  “Why couldn’t you just talk to me?” 
“I don’t know Josh. I was scared you wouldn’t understand where I was coming from.” She cupped his cheeks and brought his head down so that his forehead was resting on hers. “I’m sorry.” 
“I’m sorry too. About comparing you to his mom. You nothing like her Janelle.” 
“It's okay, I know you were mad, heat of the moment type shit.”  He leaned his head back so he could look her in the eyes. 
“It’s not okay, I’m surprised you didn’t slap the shit outta me.” She laughed and placed her head on his chest, wrapping her arms around his middle. They stood there embracing each other.  “I don’t know about you.” He said after a minute. “But I was in a grueling ass match the other day and my body hurts.”  She picked her head up and arched her eyebrow. 
“Whatchu tryna say?” 
He smirked at her.  “We can go upstairs, you can give me one of those full body massages I've been missing.” 
She laughed, throwing her head back. “You mean the massages that always lead to something more.” 
“Shiit, I mean..” He trailed off. Laughing when she hit him in the chest. “Alright, you staying for dinner?” 
She nodded and followed him into the kitchen. “Yeah I’ll stay.” 
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One more chapter. ❤️ Thank you for all the comments likes and reblogs on part 1 hopefully this part is just as good.
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rorywritesjunk · 11 months ago
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A mini lil fic. PG. Mentions of animal illness and death. Crying people. Takes place about a year into Buggy and Sunny's marriage (this isn't spoilery since it was mentioned in the Kid Buggy fic 👀) Title comes from The Cave by Mumford and Sons.
And I'll find strength in pain And I will change my ways
To Buggy, Sunny can do no wrong. Ever. He thinks she's absolutely perfect. He's the type of husband who would do whatever he could for her to make sure she's always happy. He remembers her birthday, her favorite flower, the day they met. Everything.
He fucks up badly only once in their marriage and it was within the first year.
Sunny was crying over the loss of one of Mohji's animals, a bear. It was sick for a while and she convinced Buggy to see if they could find someone to treat the poor thing. When they finally anchored and they found a vet, it was too late. The poor thing was past treatment so the humane thing was to put the bear to sleep. Mohji was a wreck and Sunny was inconsolable.
Buggy was an idiot.
"It's just an animal, babe." He grumbled one night while getting ready for bed. "Mohji isn't even crying that much over it."
"B-But I feel so bad for him!" Sunny sniffed as she held a tissue to her face. "He-he loved that bear so much, Buggy! And he's dead! We couldn't help him!"
He rolled his eyes. The vet wasn't sure why the bear's health declined suddenly. Mohji took very good care of the animals, but sometimes things happened. Mohji and some of the men buried the animal out in the woods later that day but Buggy didn't want Sunny to tag along. He wanted her to get over it.
"Look, the animals aren't your concern, okay?" He sighed as he got into bed beside her. "Just suck it up and move on. Mohji already has."
Sunny lowered the tissue from her face as she turned to look at Buggy. "What did you just say?"
He paused for a moment, trying to recall what he just said.
"I... Said the animals aren't your concern?"
"Try again."
Oh shit. He heard the tone in Sunny's voice and knew he was in trouble. There has been one time before when he heard her speak like that and he knew he was in trouble.
"Sunny, b-babe, just... Don't concern yourself with Mohji's animals." He managed to get out, smiling wide at her, hoping she wouldn't get mad. She sat beside him in bed, arms crossed as she stared at him with an unreadable look on her face. "All I said was... Suck it up and move on... B-Because it's just one bear, babe. Not a big deal."
"So what you're saying is you don't want me to express emotions, Buggy?" Sunny asked coldly. "I should just keep it all inside or something?"
"Yes!"
Oh, no, that wasn't the right answer. He tried again.
"I mean... Show them but... Not all the time? Just... Just stop crying?"
Sunny stared at him before she laid down on the bed with her back to him. He reached out to touch her shoulder but she jerked away from him.
"Don't, Buggy." She snapped.
"B-Babe, come on!" He insisted. "I didn't mean, um-"
"Good night." She pulled the blankets close and closed her eyes. He didn't even get a good night kiss.
~
Sunny cooked him breakfast the next morning but left when he started eating. He thought maybe she'd be better by lunch time, but she repeated what she did at breakfast: fixed him a plate and left.
He tried talking to her but she ignored him as she went about her chores.
Fine, he could also be stubborn and ignore her.
Except that only lasted a few hours before he was on the ground in front of her while she patched a hole in a crewman's pants. Buggy was hugging her legs, trying to get her to notice him, but she ignored him as she worked.
"Babe, please don't ignore me!" He begged. "Please!"
One thing Buggy learned about his wife that week was she could stand her ground. She gave Buggy the cold shoulder for an entire week. Seven days. If he would have apologized she would have stopped but he didn't until the end of the week when he was at her feet again, resting his head in her lap while she worked. Mohji and some men were off the ship again, getting supplies, while Sunny worked.
"Please talk to me." Buggy whined pitifully. "What do I have to do?"
Sunny sighed and stopped what she was doing. "Apologize to me. That's all I want."
"A-Apologize?! For what?!" Buggy demanded. Sunny stared at him for a moment before shaking her head. "You should apologize to me for ignoring me all week!"
"Really, Buggy?" Sunny said. "You tell me to stop crying, not to show emotions, but you want me to apologize to you, is that what you're saying?"
"Obviously! You've been ignoring me all week, Sunny! Why should I apologize?!"
"Because you hurt my feelings!" Sunny exclaimed. "Buggy, I was upset and instead of comforting me you told me to suck it up! I have never once said anything like that to you when you were down, so I'd expect you would comfort me when I need it!"
Buggy's eyes widened slowly. He felt like a terrible husband because Sunny was right. She was always there, hugging and reassuring him whenever he needed it, ever since they met, and she never asked for anything in return. The one time she wanted it he ignored her feelings and made it about him.
"I-I 'm sorry, Sunny! I am, please, I'm sorry, don't... Don't do this anymore." He pleaded as he buried his face in her lap. "I'm sorry. You... You can cry as much as you want. Don't leave me or anything."
Sunny took a deep breath, exhaled slowly, and looked down at Buggy. "I am not leaving you over this. And I'm glad you apologized, Buggy."
He glanced up at her, eyes watery as he sniffed. "Really?"
"Yes." She said. "Now never say anything like that to me again, are we clear?"
He could only nod, tears in his eyes as he clung to her. Sunny could feel a headache coming on.
"I love you." He mumbled as he shut his eyes, clinging to her while she resumed her tasks.
"I love you too, Buggy." Sunny replied. "Now let me finish my work, okay?"
He just nodded, keeping close to her, fearful she might disappear before his eyes. Sunny reached down to pat him on the head gently before finishing her work. She was glad he apologized and hoped he would learn from this, but she would also be more vocal about her emotional needs as well around him, and if he ever told her to suck it up again then she would walk away.
end.
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