#I'll add more when I remember anything else or if yall want me to talk about specifics

[sunshine-vx]

Across Space, Time and Dreams (ASTaD) (Ch. 15)

(Blankshippers DNI)

(Please refer to beginning of chapter 1 post for complete list of CWs/TWs)

(This chapter's illustrations done by me!)

(Read it on Ao3 here!)

(Reblogs are appreciated!)

(Extra notes: YIPPIEE!! Here's chapter 15, everyone! I had everything done today, so I thought I'd post a week early than I usually do! This chapter may come off as a bit repetitive, both because it's to help with the certain structure and way of presenting the points within the chapter, as well as me kiinda struggling just a bit with it, so I apologize for that. That aside, I hope yall enjoy it!)

(Important message under the dash, please read! The chapter's text will be after the message!)

-

(Hi guys! As I just told yall, I have something important to tell yall-- and don't worry! It's not anything like the fic getting cancelled! What it is, is that I'd simply like to take a little bit of a break, (as I have been focusing a lot on this fic for quite as while), along with being able to take more time on publishing the next chapter. Chapter 16 will be the longest chapter in the entire fic so far, and by a long shot! I, and those who help with this fic (mostly my sister lol), want to be able to bring the next chapters to life as we have the previous ones, but it'll take longer due to the chapter's length (and importance-- no spoilers, all I'm saying it is IS important!)!

I'll try not to take too terribly long, but there may be delays, although I hope there aren't any, and I don't really have a set length for my break, although it probably won't be anything more than a month at max! Again, I PROMISE this fic will not end up abandoned and unfinished! At most it may just take a while to update!

That's all I've gotta say for now! If I think of anything else, I'll add it here when and if it comes to mind! Thank you all SO much for yalls patience and support, and of course, for reading! I'll see yall next time, and I hope yall enjoy this chapter!)

-

Ingo sat at the bench outside the Wallflower, eating by himself and deep in thought. He had awoken this morning to a strange feeling; That he needed to do something, but didn't know exactly what. He asked Lady Irida, Lady Zisu– and Lady Sneasler, when he was doing his morning warden duties– if he could take a day to himself, and while that wasn't exactly his normal attitude, Ingo just told them he needed time to think about something important. Of course, they all understood. This could be a test run to see how well the other people running his jobs for him would do. So far, it seemed like they were doing great.

Everything had been taken care of. The Battlegrounds, his Warden Duties. There was nothing else to worry about. Ingo could finally focus more on his origins. But even so, Ingo felt like he had one more thing to do before he took any real steps forward.

Then, it came to him.

Reflect. Self-reflection.

He just needed to think about it.

For his entire time in Hisui, around five whole years, Ingo had felt like some parts of him were missing; And it was more than the fact that he could only remember his name when he first appeared in this land. 

As repeated time and time again, he was a stranger to this land and its ways; He looked differently, spoke differently, acted differently, dressed differently. Even his relationships with Pokémon were almost instinctually different. Although he didn't really mind- regardless, his own little unique ways; His peculiar outfit, the particular way he talked and the words he used, how he viewed Pokémon- they all felt natural and good to him.

"Sometimes I say things, and I don't know what they mean, but they give me a feeling of familiarity and power."

Because of these things, Ingo had always felt like he was probably from somewhere else– and recently, he had come to the conclusion that he was from a different land, and a different time. Akari, someone in the same circumstances, had set off some vague memories in his brain. She was more similar to him than anyone else in Hisui. She had given him hope regarding his origins, his memories. 

And she and Rei had helped him hit the nail on the head. So what was stopping Ingo? He could go approach Rei and Akari right now, ask for Dialga and Palkia to help him show him his origins at that very moment. 

And he wanted to. But something else was telling him, maybe, just maybe, he needed to wait a little while longer, to do something important.

So he would. 

Ingo felt like he needed to self-reflect on the memories that had come to him in his time here so far; To reflect on things that gave him a particular feeling, a feeling of comfort, of familiarity. 

The first thing that came to Ingo's mind was where he had remembered some seemingly important things.

Wayward Cave. He should go there.

And so, Ingo finished his food, thanked and paid the cook accordingly, and made his way out of Jubilife Village.

As Wayward Cave came into view, Ingo felt a warm feeling well inside him. He always felt almost at home in Wayward Cave, and enjoyed his job of escorting people through it. Ingo walked inside Wayward Cave, and his eyes were immediately drawn to the torches. He especially liked the cave with those torches; Not just because it led the way through, it also just seemed…almost familiar. As if a tunnel with a light source in it was comforting for whatever reason. 

He remembered telling Akari some peculiar things within Wayward Cave.

"I recall, faintly, that I had a partner once. A precious one. Its name escapes me, but I remember that it wielded flames with mastery. If only it were here, I'm sure it would light the way, luring us onward…"

As Ingo remembered this, he stopped right beside one of the torches. As his mind raced and was empty at the same time, he reached out and grabbed it, holding it with one hand to his side.

This made Ingo feel…happy. But also sad. Was this what it would be like to walk through Wayward Cave, if his once-precious partner were here with him? Even though that thought made Ingo feel sorrowful, it also brought great comfort to him. He decided he'd walk the rest of the way with it in his hand, as if his partner was there with him, even if he couldn't even remember what exactly it was.

As Ingo made his way through the cave, he remembered another thing he had said here.

"I'm starting to recall a man who looked…like me. We'd battle and discuss Pokémon, I think…The words "I like winning more than anything else" flashed through my mind just now…"

Ingo felt saddened by this. He felt like this man had been precious to him, too; But now he wasn't here. 

Ingo felt like maybe he had walked paths like the one he treaded through Wayward Cave with this man, as well as the partner Pokémone he had remembered, even if it wasn't as vivid.

Ingo took a breath in and looked up. There was nothing else in this cave that Ingo was drawn to with his jumbled up thoughts.

He continued forward.

Ingo felt saddened when he had to leave the torch within Wayward Cave, but he didn't want to cause any hazards outside. He carefully leaned the torch on the wall of the cave, before making his way outside. 

After a minute or so of walking, Ingo spotted a fellow Pearl Clan member looking…anxious to say the least. Ingo approached him, and the person yelped, whipping around, before sighing in relief when they saw it was just Ingo.

"Don't worry, Fora, it's just me." Ingo said, "You seem upset; Is something the matter?"

Fora sighed, "I wouldn't say 'upset' per se, but…I was trying to retrieve berries for my family like I usually do out here, but there's some dangerous-looking Pokémon blocking the way. I hate to bother you with this, but..do you think you could help me out?"

Ingo nodded, "Of course I can, just show me where to go."

Fora nodded and began to lead the way. As they walked, Ingo remembered how Fora said they were gathering berries for their family.

Family…Ingo suddenly remembered something else he had said, this time in one of the many ruins of Hisui.

"I can't remember my own home, nor my family, if I had any…"

If he had any…while what he had said was right, it being a fact that he didn't remember his own family, or if he even had any, saying he never had any family felt almost…wrong. 

Before he could think any further, Ingo was snapped out of his trance by Fora speaking, causing Ingo to stop in his tracks.

"Here we are…"

Ingo looked ahead, seeing an Alpha Luxray and an Alpha Mothim guarding some berry trees. Two Alpha Pokémon? He could take them out, but it wouldn't hurt to get some help.

The concept of Pokémon battling was also seen as a bit strange throughout Hisui, but most Pokémon seemed to enjoy it, and it felt natural to Ingo, having great skill with it as if he had done it for a while before he landed in Hisui– and he was always up for a good battle, anyway. 

"Fora, I have an idea." Ingo spoke, "Do you have any Pokémon, and any experience with battling?"

"I do," Fora replied, "but we're far from the best. Why do you ask?"

"Maybe we can battle together against those two Alpha Pokémon. I can take them down by myself if necessary, but any help wouldn't hurt- but only if that's okay with you, of course." Ingo explained.

"Oh! Of course I can do that!" Fora affirmed, "I mean, it's a bit of a new type of battling, but…I'm sure we can do it!"

Ingo nodded, "Let's do it, then!"

"Gardevoir, use Psyshock!", Fora ordered. Fora's Gardevoir's eyes lit up and glowed mysteriously, before sending a wave of psychic power over to the Alpha Mothim.

"Gliscor, Earth Power!" Ingo commanded his Gliscor. Gliscor stabbed the ground with its stinger, causing a crack to form underneath the Alpha Luxray, the ground erupting from underneath it. 

And as the power of the moves faded, the Alpha Pokémon stumbled. They growled, before running out of sight.

"Haha! We did it!" Fora exclaimed

"..Indeed we did." Ingo added, and as he took out a potion to heal his Gliscor, he was hit by a strange feeling of familiarity as he saw the wide smile on its face as it hovered towards him. Ingo smiled back, dripping the potion on Gliscor's wounds, congratulating it for its excellent performance in battle. 

A few moments later, Fora's voice caught Ingo's attention. 

"Aaand, there!" Fora hopped down from the tree, basket filled with berries. Ingo then handed Fora a potion as well, who thanked him. Fora's Gardevoir used its physic powers to hand a berry to Gliscor, who delightfully took it with its claws. Fora and Ingo laughed, Ingo giving Gliscor a pat on the head.

"Will that be all?" Ingo questioned. 

Fora nodded, "Yes, thank you so much, Warden Ingo! Your skill in battle is amazing!"

Ingo chuckled, "Thank you, Fora- you showed much skill, yourself. Well, I'll be on my way, then. Be careful out there!"

"You too!"

Gliscor finished the berry, looking content, so Ingo returned it to its Pokéball. Ingo stared at the contraption for a moment. The rest of the Pearl Clan deemed them as strange, but Ingo had been almost delighted when the Galaxy Team offered the inventions to them; It felt natural to use them.

Ingo shook his head, snapping out of his trance. He placed the Pokéball in his coat, turning to continue towards his next destination. 

As Ingo walked away and towards the mountain side, he ran the battle he and Fora had just done through his head. The concept of battling along someone's side made him…happy. Excited. Then, the thought of family came back to him.

He wasn't sure why, but he felt as if the two were intertwined to him.

Soon enough, the sun was setting, and Ingo needed a place to go for tonight. He then thought, maybe tonight, he'd rest in Lady Sneasler's den; He did that sometimes when he was having an odd day. 

Approaching the wall of the mountain that he had battled Akari at, Ingo took out his Celestica Flute and played it, alerting Lady Sneasler that he required her assistance. He put it back after he was done, and after some moments, he heard the sound of claws digging into rocks and feet bumping onto the surface. He looked up, and his eyes followed Lady Sneasler back to the ground as she let go of the mountain side and landed on the snow.

"Lady Sneasler! Thank you for coming," Ingo conveyed, "I am having a strange day today, and wish to sleep in the den tonight. Is that okay?"

Lady Sneasler trilled and flicked her feather out of her face. That was fine with her. Luckily, Lady Sneasler always made sure to bring her basket in case anybody calling her needed a ride. She set it on the ground, Ingo climbing in, and before Ingo knew it, he was being transferred up the mountain.

Ingo enjoyed being transferred by the Nobles, and was grateful to provide that possibility to those he could. Like every other obscure thing, it almost reminded Ingo of something, but he didn't know what. The idea of effective forms of transportation, especially one Ingo could help others with, was appealing to him.

Before long, Ingo and Lady Sneasler reached an easier part of the mountain to ascend. Ingo decided to exit the basket at that point, as he and Lady Sneasler would also need to gather grass and other soft materials for Ingo so he could sleep better in the den. 

After a while, they had gathered enough, and Ingo and his Lord made their way to the seat, where the den always was. When they got there, Ingo thought he'd ask Lady Sneasler one more favor.

"Lady Sneasler, thank you for your help! If it's alright, I have one more favor to ask of you." Ingo told his Noble, "If it's not any trouble for you, may you put the bed of grass together for me? I need to feed my Pokémon team before resting for the night."

Lady Sneasler chattered in response, being happy to do so. She took the grass they had gathered and entered the den.

Ingo approached the clearing outside the den and letting out his Pokémon team. They were excited to see him, and for dinner time, and they made sure he knew that. Ingo laughed, patting his Pokémon, talking to them and preparing their dinner.

"Hello, everyone! Good to see you all again– as it is everytime!" Ingo verbalized, "It's dinnertime, so make sure to eat up!"

Ingo handed each Pokémon a nice combination of berries, smiling as he watched them eat, happy to see them happy. He decided he'd play with them just for a little while, since they hadn't been out as much as they normally would today. Sneasler even joined at some point once she had finished setting things up in the den. 

As Ingo played with his dear Pokémon, he thought to himself some. Most people in Hisui were just now getting used to co-existing with Pokémon properly, but to Ingo, the concept never seemed weird in the first place; Compared to others, he had a strange talent of being able to work with Pokémon, which is why he became Warden in the first place.

Ingo loved his Pokémon and the idea of humanity co-existing with them; He was very glad and thankful the idea was being normalized now.

Soon, the moon was up in the sky, and Ingo decided it was time for sleep. He made sure to tell his beloved team goodnight, returning them to their Pokéballs. 

Sneasler and Ingo retired to the den, the kits fast asleep. Sneasler was also quite tuckered out, apparently, as she almost immediately yawned and laid against the wall beside the bed of grass she had made for her Warden, falling asleep quite quickly. Ingo chuckled. 

Today had been strange. Ingo had visited many things that felt familiar to him, having many thoughts and feelings, and while he felt just a little bit closer, he felt as if there was a lot more work to be done to find his origins more thoroughly.

And although Ingo felt conflicted, as he prepared for rest, for some reason, he felt comforted by the thought of tomorrow. Ingo settled down on the bed of grass and other soft materials that his Lord had helped him prepare so he could rest just a bit more comfortably in the den. Ingo was grateful, and even if it wasn't perfect, he didn't mind; He had slept in the cave before, and the presence of Lady Sneasler was quite a bit comforting in and of itself. 

One of Sneasler's kits, who had apparently decided to stay up, waddled up to Ingo and chirped, holding its hands out. Ingo chuckled and gently picked up the Sneasel, laying his head down, Ingo resting the kit under his arms on his chest. The kit seemed happy with this, seeming very comfortable as it closed its eyes. Ingo smiled.

And then, as Ingo soon drifted into sleep, one thought passed through his head; What would he dream of tonight?

Chapter 14

Chapter 16 (part 1 of 2)

[bisexualraplines]

I change my mind. You can absolutely go forth and spoil me about the clown movie. I won't be seeing it until Sept 17th and that is far too long to wait LOL

gonna add a read more in case my mutuals don’t wanna see anything!!! warning for the mention of a suicide (non graphic) and homophobia 

stan writes and sends heartfelt, individual notes to each of the losers

his su*cide is not shown onscreen, just the aftermath, which is quite graphic 

the film is 3 hours long and has a good balance of flashbacks, humor and horror. a reddit user said there are about 5 jump scares, but they are all similar to the ones from the first film (the tension leading up to them is very well constructed, no cutaways like the first film)

the ritual before the defeating battle against clown binch is each loser having to face their fears, and overcome them in a battle of wills

richie is explicitly queer! his arc is based off his childhood struggle, coming to terms with his sexuality, and dealing with his crush on his best friend (whose feelings come back out after their memories of each other return after they reunite 27 yrs later). he is shown to ‘realize’ his sexuality in a flashback where he accidentally brushes hands with a boy, he’s visibly flustered. afterwards, during his encounter with clown b*tch, he’s taunted (this is where the vid leak where the lines ‘i know your secret, your dirty little secret’ comes in) 

directly from the reddit user: ‘i gathered that his vulgarity/trashmouth/ persona was a cover for deep insecurity and shame about his sexuality. picking on eddie was an attempt to distract from his inner truth that he had feelings for him

during the clubhouse scene, richie’s nervous around eddie and its made clear he’s developed a crush on him to the audience. during a particularly c*te moment, while he’s in a hammock, eddie says its his turn but richie doesn’t get off, which results in eddie climbing in with him :’)

eddie’s sexuality is made more unclear, with it being not as obviously stated as richie’s. which I find unfortunate due to his gay coding from the book (i.e his ‘fear’ being a clear metaphor for internalized homophobia). but who knows, I’ve seen people say its more one sided, but it hasn’t been said that it isn’t unrequited, or if he is even aware of richie’s feelings. I interpret him as being very, very repressed (which bill and james have even mentioned in an interview) his arc is about overcoming self-doubt and realizing that even though he thinks himself to be too weak to face clown b*tch, he actually ends up making some of the most pivotal contributions to It’s defeat

richie etches the r+ as a kid and goes back to add the e towards the end of the film. a binch (me) is going to lose her goddamn mind

‘they have very delicate moments on top of their usual banter’ they really see each other again after 27 years and go immediately back to roasting. i am so fond 

almost every critic review i’ve seen so far has been praising bill hader (richie)’s performance. its what he deserves!

ALRIGHT ENOUGH ABOUT THE GAYS. I think I might go into a longer, in depth essay about my thoughts on them? especially with their decision to not delve into addressing eddies sexuality after the 30 years of book speculation and to instead make richie the explicitly queer one. as well as his sexuality shone in a positive, open way and how he overcomes his struggles? which like. bravo. especially with it being a mainstream, widely  anticipated horror movie. one of the most popular horror franchises of this decade where the target demographic are hetties… the POWER

they delve into mikes characterization quite a lot more this time around!

they’ve altered a bit of the losers’ profession. which makes sense considering the book is from the 80s

the bowers scenes were described as the most ‘fucked up’ because of his instability and clown binches control over him

bev’s husband makes an appearance, although brief, and he’s a real dickhead

I’m at work but if you want any specifics lmk! I’m in absolute hysterics. I love horror, and I love well written horror, and I love sweet sweet validation over queer coded characters from books written in the 80s ajdfjdjd. I spent a good two whole hours defending the possibility of r+e on reddit last night cause the denial of some of these hetties………….. 

[stormblessed95]

I was browsing through another blog and one anon was saying they always drop honorifics quoting Yoongi in the latest vlive. I know it’s not true though. Can you remember instances when JK dropped the honorifics on the other members casually? I know he shouts Yoongi jokingly and took advantage of Yoongi’s absence once. I can’t recall specific ones.

Well this is a QUESTION. Lmao I will definitely link a few examples. I also though definitely want to add this post here first. I go into major depth about honorifics in this post. Please read it if you haven't yet. I talk about what they are, how they are used snd then how JK does (and does not) use them as well here too.

I mentioned the difference in that post as well about how he uses/drops them with his other hyungs vs how he uses/drops them with Jimin as well. I'll quote those paragraphs here for you, literal copy/paste. Sorry, it's a lot of typing. Lol but the thoughts are the same and apply here too so it's easier this way for me:

Now let's talk about BTS, and Jungkook using (or not using) honorifics specifically. Now I will say that ALL of BTS are insanely close and have almost no boundaries together. Over the years, I am POSITIVE that all 6 of his hyungs have given him permission to use banmal with them on occasion, or off camera. And I could find examples of JK dropping honorifics with every single member if I wanted to (but that's a lot, send another ask if yall want that. This is already an essay. Just trust me for now please). But we also know that using honorifics is his norm for the most part, and especially during the early years, he wanted to keep that up. He wanted to show his respect for his hyungs in that way. During his ITS talk with Tae, we learn that Tae asked him to use banmal with him and that JK refused in the early years.

The majority of the times we see him drop honorifics with his hyungs, it's in a teasing manner. It's being a giant brat on purpose. It's to get a reaction and make everyone laugh. Because he isn't really being disrespectful, his hyungs don't mind and they love and trust each other to pieces. But it's not him TRULY dropping honorifics as it's more of a tease. We do see him genuinely drop them sometimes, normally in celebratory excitement. Like when he dropped them for Jin in his excitement over congratulating him on his solo release. Or when he called Taehyung TaeTae during a game in a variety show. And he often drops honorifics or just uses -ssi when addressing the members by their stage names (Rap Monster, V, JHope). They did bring up JK dropping honorifics with Yoongi during Butter interviews, saying he shouts his name in the halls sometimes just going "YOOOONGGGIIIII" at the top of his lungs. Lol and yes, the fact that he DOES and CAN do that, speaks to the incredibly close relationship he has with his hyungs. But again, that specific example reads more teasing and joking that a serious drop of honorifics. Or it's different because it's their stage name, not truly their name. But with Jimin... with Jimin, it's different and it's often...

The post is long, but it goes into more detail and if you haven't read it yet, please do! So here is the thing, I don't really consider the stage name use as a true dropping of honorifics, it's not their name and they all very often will just use the stage name, aka: "suga" often without attaching anything else to it. They will still sometimes say Suga-hyung or Suga-ssi with the added honorific, but it really is a fairly even split. And they still are considered from what I've seen to be not be speaking informally even when just using the "Suga" in their overall speech. It still speaks though to their level of comfort in the group that they are not super strict over that stuff. And often when stage names are used, no one laughs or teases the others about that drop of honorifics. And they often will otherwise.

Please keep in mind that I am for sure going to miss some here. I'm trying to fit 5 members into one post as well as working off what I can find easily. I will probably prioritize more casual drops in honorifics, then just the teasing times or the stage name usages unless that's all I can find though too.

And with that all out of the way, some times JK has dropped honorifics with Jin:

The way JK calls Jin "JAN" in often the most silly ways and usually when Jin is being silly or cute himself

During Muster games when he got to have informal time with Jin 🤣

And during a fansign, [trans from tinyseokjinnie]

Jin: Guys what do you think about our outfits?

ARMYs: CUUUTTTEEE

Jin: Cute? Who's the cutest?

ARMYs: SEOKJINIEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

Jimin: Nonon its Park Jiminie

Jin: Its SEOKJINNIE!!

JK: Seokjinah!!!

Jin: Why you keep dropping honorifics?

JK: Seokjinah why did you do choreo wrong today?

Jimin: Ah - Seokjinah come here

Hoseok: Ah Seokjinah why did you do that

(starts bullying)

Jin: Very sorry.. very sorry...

(They never let him live 🤣)

The way JK will drop honorifics with Yoongi:

When BTS were told to call their families and called Suga instead since he wasn't able to perform with them and gave him cute messages. JK started his off with "Yoongi-ah." Lol and Suga kekekeke'd about it on Weverse then too. Literally just going "yoongi ah! Kekeke" lmfao and he used informal speech through his whole message too

His comfort level at just shouting his hyungs name down company hallways with zero honorifics and Yoongi not even blinking lol

JK dropping honorifics with Namjoon:

Answering his compliment with informal language 🥺

Calling him out in a challenge during run bts lol "Kim Namjoon-ah!"

His constant joke calling Namjoon "rrrrrapppp monsterrrr" lol

JK dropping Honorifics with Hobi:

The way I can't find a clip of this anywhere 😭 but during ITS2, HopeKook were in the kitchen together and Hobi said JK was a good chingu and he just smiled in return. So while it might not have been JK speaking informal, it definitely was a drop in honorifics allowed from Hobi and recognizing how close they are

JK dropping Honorifics with Tae:

I mentioned in my paragraphs above from my other post calling him TaeTae during a game show, but that's not actually what he was doing, it was instead him guessing at what Jimin had him as in his phone, so doesn't actually count. My mistake! Lol but in his 2018 birthday tweet to Tae he does Hashtag him #TaeTaeHappyBirthday

When in a 2018 interview JK initially denied playing the informal speak game talk with his hyungs, but then namjoon said "just pick a hyung that is easiest to bully." So JK said "ahhh... ahhh... Taehyung-ah" and everyone giggled super hard

Summer Package 2018, Tae introduced JK as his chingu only for JK to start scolding him that they aren't chingus/the same age. Lol Jin then starts encouraging him to then speak informally to Tae which he then does for a bit: "yah!" Lol

And then yet in 2021 Festa, the members were playing a word association game and when the prompt was Taehyung, JK answered "chingu." How far they've come since 2018 🥺 the drop in honorifics and formality showcasing their close friendship now!

Now I talk about JK dropping honorifics with Jimin in that post I linked at the top, and I talk about it a bit more as well here too. The difference is, in my opinion, clear. But that doesn't mean that the comfort level he has with his other hyungs is less. I talk about formal vs informal between all the members more as well in my Dangshin post too. So I don't think this person was necessarily wrong when they said they all do it all the time... they aren't totally right either. I'm 100% positive though that off camera and on personal time, informal speech is much more common than it is on camera. And they all do it, not just JK. Jimin actually seems to be the most "strict" in ways about sticking to formal speech when speaking to or about his hyungs and staying respectful. And even he does drop honorifics in geniune casual ways and in teasing ways with the older members. As well as their many stories about all being as close as family and so loving and genuine with each other. The informality certainly skyrockets when they are alone. But I do also think there is a fairly easy to see difference in context and tone with JK dropping honorifics with his other hyungs and with his Jimin hyung. Just my opinion though!

Hope this helped some! And if there are moments I've forgotten in here, I'm sure there are, please be forgiving! Lol there is 10 years of content that I'm sure JK has dipped into banmal more than just this. It's silly to think otherwise. And correct me if any of my information is incorrect too! Thanks for the ask

[scentedcandlesandcookies]

So I was inspired by @mrpenguinpants (go check out their work I'm referring to below this paragraph) and wanted to do another genshin fic. The interactions here can be anything you want it to mean (besides qiqi ofc). Also this is very self indulgent.

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Warnings: Self hatred, self loathing, blood, depressing thoughts ig(?), momentary oblivion of you squint.

Also I'm on mobile so I'm so sorry for not being able to add a read more option!

Somehow you knew without knowing. You said things without needing to say it. A vessel of purity and wholeness. You had so much to give.

But how much was too much?

Qiqi called yours name on a rather sunny day. You were just about to head to Bubu Pharmacy when she ran up to them.

"Could you help me pick herbs? We always go together."

You knew what she meant in ways she couldn't convey. You were special to her, to everyone. You weren't aware of it though.

Knowing the worth of others was easier than knowing the worth of yourself.

"Of course, Qiqi, I'll always have time for you."

Qiqi loved your smile. It felt familiar. Qiqi saw you as an older sibling. She loved you in ways she couldn't express.

"I'm only good to be your ladder though! You know I'm not good with naming herbs!"

On a cooler day, Zhongli called you to have some tea with him. The both of you sat at a teashop watching the harbor through the open window.

The gentle breeze touched all uncovered parts of your skin. The smell of the sea dancing underneath your nose. The sunset painting a melancholic picture.

"The ocean looks sad today."

Zhongli looked at you rather confusedly. After promptly sipping his tea he responded.

"How can an ocean look sad? Something so old shouldn't be humanized."

The last sentence was more for himself than anything. You didn't know, but he sometimes loathed himself for all he'd done. He wondered if all the blood spilt was worth it.

You reminded him of Guizhong, so ready to see things in a new light without judgement. He often hears you sing to glaze lilies around Qingce.

"How could we forget what all the ancients did for us?"

A day after some much needed rain, you spotted Ganyu. Busy as ever, she was handling the unending work she often received. You decided to help out.

"Good morning, Ganyu. You seem to be someone who'd appreciate and extra pair of hands."

The joking atmosphere seemed to help lift the weight more than your hands. Ganyu giggled a bit.

"Some help would be much appreciated."

The rest of the day didn't feel like work. Ganyu felt the days of her childhood rushing back to her. Days without worry or work. Everything felt warmer, the sun began peeking its head out of the clouds.

"I'll do my best."

You visited Hu Tao on a gloomy day. The clouds were gray and it looked as if it was about to rain. You entered the doors of the funeral parlor with the permission of the ferrylady.

Unfortunately, Hu Tao wasn't feeling very Hu Tao that day. Walking into her office, she seemed lost in thought.

"Hu Tao?"

The gift of candies laud forgotten on the desk. You moved to place a hand on her shoulder. A gesture of your listening presence.

"They're just pranks, and I'm just trying to get business. Like everyone else, its just...different."

Pulling her in for a hug, just being a strong unbreakable pillar for her sake.

"They don't see all the things you do behind the scenes. That makes them immature, not you. I don't think they know why you do the things you do, and you know what? That's okay. You know what you're doing, and that's the best thing you could do. You're doing so well."

Liyue knew you so so well. An unbreakable pillar. A foundation that so many people needed.

What would happen if you ever crumbled? Well, that could never happen.

You visited Xiao on a rainy day. No heavy downpour, just a normal pitter-patter kind of rain.

You held a new dish in your hands, thinking that Xiao should try a new dish. Not to 'be more human' but to just try a different taste of life.

"Why are you still coming here? Its a long way from the harbor."

You simply smiled at the ground and put down the dish. Too afraid to sit on the railing, you opted for the floor.

"Being lonely isn't fun."

"As I thought, you're still so blind. Loneliness is my only company."

You laughed for a moment.

"Guess I should change my name to loneliness then."

You dared not to look at the mighty yaksha. You were just a pathetic human after all. Letting the dish sit in your lap, you outstretched your arms behind you.

"And you can't go around telling people they're blind! We all see things differently. You might think you need to spend eternity in loneliness, but we all crave to be loved or appreciated. Xiao, you're stuck with me."

You closed your eyes and turned towards Xiao, giving him a smile.

You felt the dish being taken from your lap and heard him sit next to you.

He began eating the warm soup.

Today was a bad day to go out. Heavy rain and a dark atmosphere. But you had commissions knocking against your income. You were preoccupied with something else though.

Everyone's busy. I really need some help but everyone's busy and I don't want to bother them.

You admired Qiqi for braving through her life as best as she could.

You admired Zhongli for his wise and comforting views on life.

You admired Ganyu's persistence in her work, but most importantly in herself.

You admired Hu Tao for being herself even when others shamed her for it.

You admired Xiao for living through such mundane life, day after day.

You wanted to be just like them, but you just couldn't do it on some days.

You wanted to hide. You wanted to bitch about your day. You wanted to give up. You wanted to hide yourself to avoid judgement. You wanted something different. Someone different.

Someone who wasn't you.

You never looked as good as everyone else. Your voice never sounded right. Your never seemed to be mentionable or noteworthy. And on some days you were okay with that.

Am I really going to be another grain of salt?

You trudged through the thick mud, ignoring the blisters on your feet. The rain seemed to taunt you as it settled in your clothes, your bones.

All you could taste was steel. You couldn't remember the last meal you ate. You felt so tired. You wanted to just stop everything.

But how could you? How could you when everyone else went on? It was just one last commission. They all have so much on their plate, you couldn't burden them anymore.

But your lungs burnt, you couldn't feel your fingers on your right hand. Where was your weapon? When did you lose your bag?

Why were your eyes so blurry? Everything sounded so loud. You just wanted to sleep. You were tired. You were trying so hard.

Why was it so fucking hard?

Why couldn't you do it? Why were you always so unsure? Why didn't you work as well as the others? Your feet moved by themselves. They weren't going fast enough. Your body wasn't good enough.

You're not enough.

You think you're at your destination. You don't know. Everything feels so unclear. Everything feels wrong.

Then there was warmth on your back. It was so warm, so comforting. It finally lulled you to sleep.

The millileth pulled the mitachurl's firey axe from the back of your corpse.

You were confused when you woke up. A girl with brown hair and a hat was frantically calling someone. You were in a lobby of sorts. There were others talking about people who left. They didn't look like people. They were see through.

See through just like you.

"Aiya! Why aren't you listening to me you idiot! You scared us! What happened?"

The girl seemed to be the only normal person here. Suddenly you felt like you've been ripped from that foggy place.

People were calling the same person's name again. Over and over. You were just trying to continue sleeping when you were violently shaken.

"Hey! Whats your problem!"

You shook the person off of you. A young man with a green tattoo and dark hair. A taller man with amber eyes and brown hair. A woman with horns and silky looking blue hair. That girl from before who wore the hat. A small girl with light purple hair and had a talisman on her hat.

"You're alive! Thank the archons! We were so worried when we heard the news! " The lady with the horns looked as if she was about to cry. You felt bad but the tension was awkward.

"I'm sorry, but I don't know who you are."

Ty for reading! Leave a like and a comment if you enjoyed it! I hope some of yall picked up the hidden meanings hehehe~

Part two here:

[fortheloveofkuroo]

HAIKYUU AU;

Part 1 Part 2

Karasuno boys are having a sleepover in your place, their Manager!

7. Hinata Shouyo

Aweee look at those adorable face TwT

I'm a huge softie for first year tbh like.. WHO DOESN'T.

You know how Hinata supposed to ride his bike trough the mountain for half an hour and nu-uh baby you don't have to do that.

He doesn't mind though, he got his trusty rain coat stored back in his bag.

BUT STILL.

You insist at having the boys staying over night in your house. Watching you and Daichi having an argument it's like watching his parents quarelling.

"What about the others with a far house? Like Hinata, huh?"

DING DING DING! You - 1, Daichi - 0.

Hinata, being the most happy-go-lucky boi he is walks to your house with the most brightest grin.

You two are basically close enough, a lot of the first years really adores you. Because of your motherly side and well, your scary sides sometimes almost scares them more than Daichi's.

But Hinata, boy he is your favorites. He's the most brightest cheerful boy you've ever met and he's just like a baby brother..

To you, at least.

"Na na (Y/n)-senpai, do you have any siblings?" He asked. You nods. "Mhm i have one. He's on junior high. He's about your height." You jokes, knowing so well that Hinata will be pissed about it. And he did, he start complaining and protesting despite the rainy weather.

God you love him so much.

After unlocking the doors, you all entered the house quickly because the weather is just getting more worse. After distributing the towel, you went to bath.

While Hinata and the others busy looking around your house.

"Woaaah.. So this is what a girl's house look like.." he accidentally blurts out his thought. "Well yeah, never see a normal house before?" Tsukishima scoffs.

"Damn it Tsukishima. Shut up!" "Hey don't talk to Tsukki like that!" Yelp Yamaguchi.

After waiting for a bit the boys finally got to shower. Some of the third years showers first so he waits. But his sharp nose picks up something. Something smells delicious. The third years are back from his bath too.

So he follows his instinct and trails the delicious aroma and he ended up in Kitchen. He was about to walk past the Kitchen but then..

His eyes- Oh my for the love of Asahi's beautiful hair. He witness someone's cornering you. He panicks. He saw the gorgeous golden karaage that's been served on the plate and quickly snatch a few of them.

Before any of you could say anything, he bowed so many times and left the kitchen at ungodly speed. Leaving both of you in awkward position.

He was munching the Kaarage only to realized that his face is still in panic state. So he went to the trusty ol' buddy. Kageyama lol.

"What happen? You run into a ghost or somethin? That's what you get for cutting the line dumb-" "Kageyama.. In the kitchen.."

Ah shoot, is he really going to tell him this?

"They were in the kitchen.. They.." But before he could explained, Kageyama already assumed first what he was going to say.. incorrectly.

"Sugawara-san is cornering (Y/n)-san.." he whispered. Maybe his whisper is a tad too loud. Someone might have heard that. Kageyama clench his towel and gets up.

Poor bby tried to stop him but gets thrown away instead. He never know what happen when Kageyama went to the Kitchen. All he want to do now is get to the hot shower and eats.

"Hinata you can go." A voice told him, it was Nishinoya. Hinata thanked him and went to bathroom. Before he can get to the bathroom, he get past the kitchen. Preparing himself to witness another 'intense moment' as he past by.

But he locks eyes with you instead. You eyes was a little gloomy. His heart suddenly got a little pinch when he see your unusual facial expression.

After showering, he went out. Fold his dirty clothes and join the others. Somehow your unusual expression gets him that hard. He hardly can focus on food when you and Sugawara served the main dish.

Of course he still talks and jokes around but you're the only one who noticed that Hinata's not as cheerful when he first enter your house.

"Um.. Due to lack of the space, one of you have to sleep with me."

As usual the two second years that are going after you fights over who's the one who gets to sleep with you.

Untill you pull Hinata from the crowds and grins.

"I choose Hinata, he's like my baby brother so i trust him!" You smiles as you hang your arms on his shoulder. Hinata cannot believe you just did but everyone strangely agrees.

"He's too dumb anyway, he won't do anything weird to (Y/n)-san." Ouch, He heard that.

You leave the door open as you prepare the mattress for him. Ofc he helps too. You two pull the mattress out and prepares it.

"Here's your pillow and blanket. Do you need anything else?" You kindly asked. Hinata shakes his head.

"Kay then, i'll turn off the lights!" Once you cut off the light, the dim room suddenly got so different. You jumped to your bed and wrap yourself in your soft fluffly blanket as you face Hinata's side.

"Hehehe, i feel like sleeping with my brother, it's somehow exciting." You chuckles. Hinata looks up, he tried to find your face in the dim room. Thanks to the moon that unexpectedly shines over you two, you both able to see each others faces.

You're surprised after seeing Hinata's face. He got that serious calm face just like when he about to take over the courts. It sometimes scares you how the loud boy can be so calm yet serious.

"Do i look like that to you, (Y/n)-senpai?" He asked. Sitting right up.

"Huh?"

"Do i really look like your baby brother?" He asked. You jokingly agrees. But when he gets up. You know he's serious now. Oh fuck.

"Did you forget that i'm a boy too?" His fast movement plus the dim room causing you to lower your guards and just in a second, he's already on top of you. Wait how?

"You know.. I saw how Suga-san cornering you like this in the kitchen earlier." He explained. Ah he did witness that.

"Don't treat me like a child, (Y/n)-san. I'm- I'm a man too!" He stated while making a manly face.

You can't help but smiles. Damn, you misunderstand him. You always thought that he just adore you because you're his senpai, turns out you're wrong. He got thus serious yet commited face. And don't forget a lil' flushed cheeks.

"I'm not a kid..." those were his last word before he falls down on your body and fall asleep.

You laughed and hugs him. Hugging him close to your chest.

"Of course you're not, Shouyou.."

8. Tsukishima Kei

Salt boi is here yall

He doesn't bother to say no when you offer him.

"Hah? No thanks. I'm not in the mood for sleepover."

But oh well you insist him to go in the end. And he does.

As expected, Tsukki didn't say much or even complained. Because he kept it inside. Pfft.

"Dang it why do i have to do this?" "i should've decline." "This is just a club, duh." "How many times i have to deal with this bunch of idiots."

"ThIs iS jUst A ClUb"

He places his shoes and went in. Leaving everyone behind and drop himself to your couch.

While everyone are looking at him with the 'what-the-fuck' face and Daichi is ready to beat his ass, but you stopped them.

"It's alright you all. Tsukki is actually visited my house a lot so he gets used to it." You explained and everyone are shooked.

Everyone asked him why did he get to visit your house. He simply shrugs "Our parents are friends with each other."

Everyone never knew that you both are actually childhood friend. Well you and his older brother is. But you consider Tsukki's your childhood friend too because he used to tag along with his older brother and play together with you. Since middle school, he often visits your home. Along with Akiteru.

No one really notice this because of your rare interaction. Sure you often scolds him and talk ti him but no interaction outside the club activity.

While the other are making a ruckus he wondered. "It's been so long after i came here. When was it? Around Junior high i guess? Well, doesn't matter."

"Tsukki! You came here a lot? How come i never know??" Yamaguchi protest. He doesn't believe that his bestfriend is actually close with anyone.

"None of your bussiness Yamaguchi." He simply shut him up and dried his blonde hair.

His eyes wander around your living room. Nothing change since his last visit. He hates to admit it but it brings so much memories.

"Nee-chan, I like you!"

He snaps out. Fuck why is he remembering that now. He takes off his glass and massaged his temple as Hinata rushing back from the kitchen.

It didn't take too long for him to figure out everything because of Hinata's loud whispering. He knows what happen between you and Sugawara in the Kitchen.

It's none of his concern. Or is it?

So he didn't think about it and left to bath. Before he able to enter the bath, you tried to stop him and offer him a clean towel for him but ofc he refuse wdy expect.

Once he shut the door close, gotta admit he kinda hate seeing Sugawara touchy touchy with you. But tch, what's his problem. It's your problem, not his. So what if you date someone from the voleyball club, right?

...Right?

He left the bath feeling a little better and less annoyed. When he's back to the living room he saw how close you are to the senpais. Deep down, it honestly irks him. But oh well.

Just when he place himself infront of the table, you hand him his portion of rice. "Not too much, right? I still remember!" You smiled.

He thanked you then starts to eat. Tsukishima probably is the calmest when eating. While everybody laughs, jokes, and talks he keep quiet and focus on his food. Sure he add a littlr insults here and there but it doesn't distract him from his focus.

You love that side of Tsukishima. If only he can take Voleyball that serious, you thought to yourself.

After cleaning up and washing the dishesh, it's time to sleep.

Again, "Um... Due to the lack of space, one of you have to sleep with me."

Again, Tsukishima already prepared himself for sleeping anywhere. Anywhere is fine really. He just want to call it a night. Sleeping with you? It's out of his boundaries. He can never do that-

"Tsukishima? You alright?" Your voice snaps him out.

"Huh oh, me?"

"Yeah. You seems spacing out a lot lately." Tsukishima denies, only to realize that he's in your room and no one is around him.

"Wait. Where's everyone?" He wonder. You laughs. "They've gone to sleep. And you should too, Tsukki." You tap his back, giving him a little rub.

After you pulled the mattress out, Tsukishima helps you with the sheet and stuff. He didn't say a word. Is he okay, you always wonder.

"Can you turn the lights off, please?" You ask him. He reach for the lights and turns it off. When darkness hits you. It's like you're in a different room.

10 minute have passed and none of you made any sound. Ony the sound of your body turning over and over and the soft blanket.

"What is it? Can't sleep?" Tsukishima suddenly spoke out. You're kinda surprised a little. But you nods.

"Hey, don't you remember our first sleepover?-" "I didn't. Goodnight." He cuts you off and turns his back on you. Guess he's that tired afterall.

For god sake you've tried to close your eyes arpund hundred thousand times. But it won't. Tsukishima presence is making you hard to behave.

You face him. Looking over his broad back. He grew so fast. You barely stands a chance. You remember how you and him used to compare your height and he beats you. You remember how he used to play with you and Akiteru will suggest a weird yet fun ideas. And how that day, he... confess to you.

You snaps out when you feel a sudden hit in your hand. You look over to him and find his eyes looking at you. "Are you okay? Staring at the ceiling, not blinking for almost a minute now. I'm almost having a heart attack." He said followed with a laugh of yours.

"Sorry, reminiscing old times."

"What do you mean?"

"You know, our old times."

He suddenly became quiet again. You turn over him and rest your head at the corner of the bed. "Why.. Are you avoiding me?" Tsukishima scoffs. "Avoiding you? When?" "3 summers ago. When we're having our first sleepover. And you..."

Your heart and brain are niw deciding whether you should remind him or not. Not noticing your body being so close to the edge and boom.

You fell right trough to his body. What a coincidence right. "What the- Get off me!" He pushed you off. Ouch..

You sits on his bed. Your heart is still aching from him raising his voice. You looks away.

"Do you hate me that much? I tried to talk to you but you never listen." Tsukki looks over to you. His blurry gaze didn't help so he sits right up too and faces you.

"What is your problem? Can't you just sleep quietly?" "I cannot!" "Well then stop bothering me!" ..He might have gone too far.

Is that you've been doing? Bothering him..?

Ah fuck, never knew getting told off like this will hurt your heart that much.

"Fine, Sorry. I'll stop." You climbs up to your bed. Ignoring your aching heart you decided to close your eyes.

Until you feel a warm presence behind you. You know it's him. "What are you-" "Shut up and listen. Don't cut me off and let me finish." He stated. Your silence showing that you agrees.

"I still remember our first sleepover. I remember how we can't sleep untill 2. While Akiteru-nii is sleeping, we talk and jokes until the night goes away. But one thing that i want to forget that night is when i..." he stops for a while, seems lost. His left hand is resting on your waist. You holds his hand. Calming him.

"When i confess to you. I want to erase that memory from my mind but lucky me huh, we met again. So it's a fail." You turn around and cups his face. "..Are you assuming that night that i rejected you, Kei?" He didn't expect this. What the hell?

You chuckles, seeing his clueless face is funny. "You stupid giraffe. It's my first confession dummy. I don't know how to react so i just left you off and sleep without thinking about it. But now that i think about it.." your cheeks heating up. Ah shit.

You two are so close. There's barely any distance left. His arms suddenly pushed you into his hug. Resting your head in his chest.

"In case you want to know. My feelings haven't change a slightest."

9. Yamaguchi Tadashi.

Look at that. You've been blessed by his precious smile.

Cutie didn't want to bother you at first. But Tsukki's joining so why not?

As you already know, the first year are well obsessed? Not really, but all of them put you in a special place in their heart.

Especially for Yamaguchi.

You know his struggle. His pain. His grieve when he failed that pinch serve.

You're the one who calms him down and be there for him. His panic, he almost burst out to tears and he did, he tried to leave but you stopped him and hugs him while he's crying like a baby in your hug.

And of course after that he developed a huge crush on you.

He's amazed on how you're able to handle most of them from the craziest, loudest one to the saltiest and quietest one.

When he step into your house, he barely even realize that his face shows how happy he is. Spending a night in your house, what is this a dream?

'Till he found out that his bestfriend, Tsukishima is your childhood friend. And he never knew anything. At. All.

"Tsukki? You came here a lot? How come i never knew??" And as usual Tsukishima shuts him up

He lost a little bit of his hope. Poor baby :(

You and Yamaguchi is always a good.. friend? I mean you both comfort each other. But being their Senior and their Manager, it's your job right?

But then he heard that Sugawara-senpai is- what? Cornering you? What is going on?

His heart immediately panicks and over-thinking.

It's true that everyone want to have you, but.. He cannot lose. He won't.

For a whole day he keeps himself quiet. More quiet than the usual. From the bath to dinner. And you don't even notice. Weird, usually you notice right away.. But oh well, he can talk to you later, right?

And the time came.

"Um.. Due to the lack of space, one of you have to sleep with me."

His heart jolts up. His chance for talking to you.

He locked eyes with you. Hoping you notice him. But.. You didn't. And in the end, you decided to sleep alone. Shoot. "There goes my chance." He thought.

The coldness in the living room is not comfortable at all. His mind is still going around on you, you, and only you. He need to talk to you. So he made up his mind.

He sloowly make his way to your room. Knocking it lightly to inform you. But no answer. A minute has passed since the last knock went on your door. "She's probably asleep.." But the door's open. And he got a glimpse of you in your bed. Getting sleepy but still a little awake.

Then your eyes met. Yamaguchi squeak and tried to run away. "Wait! Yamaguchi!" And he freezes on the spot. You walk over and opens the door.

"What is it?" Your gentle smile flies is a cure for his worries and thoughts.

"I-I.. But you already asleep, i shouldn't bother you, I'm sorry.."

"No no! It's alright. Come here." You says with a smiles. God his heart feel at ease. He quietly walk closer and enter your room.

He's embarassed and it shows. His fidgety moves and the sweaty palms.

You pull the mini mattress below your bed and Yamaguchi immediately helps you. You both then sits on top of it.

"What is it you want to talk, hm?" You look over to the shy boy. He let out a sigh and then his arms wraps around you. You're quiet a bit surprise seeing him hugs you first. Usually you're the one who hugs him first if he's having a breakdown.

"Let me recharge, senpai.." Yes. You're his source of battery. Being around you or near you giving him energy that will make him last a whole day.

"Sure thing, Tadashi." You ruffles his dark green hair. You can feel his breath tickling your neck. And it's the time. "Okay now, go to sleep-" "No. Wait, don't pull away.. Not yet." He hugs you tighter, not letting you go.

"You're warm, Senpai.. And you look really cute in that pajamas." He whispered to your ears. Causing your face to turns into a blushing mess.

"What the hell Tadashi, when did you learn to sweet talk like this, huh?!" You hit his head lightly.

"Ow! I didn't, i mean it.." the boy green haired boy rubs his head as he snuggles to you.

"I know Tadashi. And it works."

Hey hey hey! FINALLY DONEEE! Oh my enjoy everybody. And remember, stay save!

[thatssonanii]

Heartbreak Hotel Pt. 2

Bloodline Family Series

Koda needed to go home. He couldn't be in Miami right now. No matter how juvenile it sounded he wanted his parents, he wanted them to tell him it would be okay and how he could fix it so it wouldn't hurt anymore. When he got in the house Roman was running around with Messiah and Micah, laughing and smiling. Seeing it brought a small smile to his face. His little brothers noticed him and ran straight for him, attacking his legs. Koda picked them both up kissing their cheeks.

"Brody, you home!" Micah squealed happily.

"We fight?" Messiah asked.

Roman approached his boys, pulling the three year olds from Koda's arms putting them on the floor. He ignored their pouting and squatted to their level.

"It's naptime. You guys go on upstairs, get your sister and get in me and Mommy's bed. Good deal?" He asked.

"Him stay?" Messiah asked looking at Koda, who nodded.

"I'm not leavin. I'll be here a few days, SiSi." (like sigh)

Koda followed Roman to his man cave after the boys had gone upstairs. Both men sat on the large sofa.

"What's botherin you, Ko?"

Koda shook his head then rubbed at his eyes. "Nothin, I'm good."

"Come on now, son." Roman said squeezing his shoulder. "I know you better than that. Your eyes are red and misty, your face is red and your hair isn't done. So I'll ask again, what's botherin you?"

Koda opened his mouth but nothing came out. He couldn't bring himself to say it. Instead he cried, he cried like he had done the past two days whenever he was alone. He felt this pain was unbearable. Roman watched his oldest for a second, it had been a while since he'd seen him cry like this.

"What's goin on, son? What happened?" Roman asked.

"It's Parker, Pop," he explained through his sobbing.

Roman started to worry, he thought the worst.

"What about her? Is she pregnant? Did something happen to her, Ko?"He nodded, holding his head down. "What are you nodding to?"

Koda looked up at his dad trying to hold back the rest of his tears. When he opened his mouth this time, Kandice walked in. She saw him crying and rushed to sit beside him, pulling his head to her chest.

"What's wrong with my baby, Roman? What did you do?"

Laughing a little, Roman shook his head at his wife. Whenever any of their kids were crying she asked that question. It didn't matter if they both entered together she still asked. "I didn't do anything to your baby, Kandi. He was gonna tell me but he started crying."

Koda sat up, out of her hold, trying to slow down the tears. His head was starting to hurt and he didn't want to deal with that. "Friday after my game she wanted me to go to this party with her," he started slowly. "We won and I usually go to whatever after party but I played all four quarters, I was tired. But she went."

Kandice sucked her teeth at him. "Boy, you better not be crying cause she went to a party without you."

Roman glared at his wife, "Hush, Kandi. Let him finish."

"Fine, fine," she said putting her hands up. "Go head, Ko."

Koda scratched his growing beard. "She came over Sunday and I guess that's when Eli and Lo found out and showed it to me."

"Showed you what," Roman asked.Koda couldn't look at either of his parents.

"She was mad at me for not goin with her so she," he paused feeling his anger and more tears starting to rise. Kandice rubbed his back and Roman told him to go on.

"She fu- had sex with these dudes that play for Auburn on Instagram live."

"She what?" Kandice yelled making Koda jump.

"I asked her and she just kept saying she was sorry, over and over. But that don't fix this shit," he cried putting his head down.

Roman nodded his head at Kandice for her to leave them. She didn't want to go but she knew it would be better for Koda if she did. Once she was out of the room and in the kitchen, she called Apryl and Trinity to vent while Koda continued to vent to Roman.

"I treated her exactly how you taught me, Pop. I did what I was supposed to do and she did that."

"You did what you were supposed to do, Koda. You can't control what someone else does."

"I love her, she said she loved me too. I don't go to one party and that's what she does," he yelled out of frustration. "Then she came straight to the apartment after the party and kissed me in my mouth."

Roman didn't want to ask but he knew he needed to.

"Did yall have sex that night?" Koda nodded making him sigh. "You used a hat?"

"Yeah. She told me not to, we almost didn't cause she got mad about me wearing one. Now I know why." He said bitterly.

That made Roman happy. His son had listened to something.

"What about oral?"

"She did. I didn't," Koda shrugged sitting back, "It was late. I ain't want her to wake E and Lo up."

While Roman continued to calm Koda down, Kandice was trying to calm her nerves on the phone. Apryl was playing devil's advocate and Trinity was the peace maker.

"I say you grab your bat, Kandi. I'll bring my knife and Trin will bring her taser. It'll be a nice lil trip to Miami."

"No," Trinity chastised, "We're not jumping that lil girl. That's not gonna make him feel any better."

"Hell, it'll make us feel a whole lot better."

"No, Apryl."

Kandice laughed. "Where was this energy when that girl broke Eli's heart? We had to barricade you in the house tp keep you from jumping on that girl."

"I don't recall," Trinity laughed.

Roman had pretty much calmed his son down and gotten him to sit back down. He'd thrown his arm around Koda squeezing his shoulder lovingly.

"Look, I'm not gonna tell you that this hurt is gonna go away cause its not. One day it just won't hurt as bad. And I won't tell you that you'll forget about it cause you won't. But I will say," Roman spoke softly, "One day you'll think about this and be thankful. You'll realize there was a reason for this."

Koda nodded listening to his dad.

"But dont let this pain just continue to hurt you. You gotta learn from it."

"Learn what?" Koda asked looking up.

"Later on when you're thinking about this you'll remember things that happened that didn't add up, that there were red flags for you and you'll learn not to ignore those things. You'll realize what you do6nt like in a partner and what you do. Understand?"

"Yes, sir. Thanks, Pops. I love you"

Koda loved the bond he had with his dad. There was nothing else in his life like it. Eli and Milo are his best friends but his dad was his first best friend.

Roman pulled his son into a hug, squeezing him tight. He kissed his head before letting go. "I love you too, Ko. Go share some of that love with ya mama before she gets jealous."

Laughing, Koda got up to go to the kitchen. When he got to the kitchen Kandice hurried off the phone and engulfed him in a big hug when he was close enough. Even though he's a foot and some inches taller than her, she still cradled him like she did when he was a baby. She hugged him tight, holding back tears, until he pulled away.

"Aight, ma. I gotta stop or Ima cry again."

Kandice laughed a little, happy to see him in better spirits.

"I'm sorry. Yall know I don't play about my babies so I had to love on you."

"I know, Ma. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Koda?"

"Yes ma'am," he answered softly. He leaned against the island with his hands pushed into the pockets of his sweat pants.

"Don't let one person ruin your mood. You hold your head up like the man that you are. This hurts now but you'll be given something much better."

Koda nodded listening to his mama talk.

"When you get back to that campus, I want you to hold your head up, put you some clothes on and do your hair. You be the man me and your Daddy raised you to be. Understand?"

"Yes ma'am. Thank y'all. I had to come home, I couldn't stay there like this."

Kandice nodded, she understood.

"Did Milo and Eli help?"

"Yeah, they tried but this wasn't something they could really help with. I needed you and Pops."

Kandice went to Koda putting her hands on his face. Leaning up on her toes and pulling his head down she kissed his forehead and whispered a prayer over him.

"I love you, Mama." He admitted softly.

"I love you too, baby boy. Always and forever."

A few days later, Koda was back on campus. He needed the break away from everything, it did him good. By the time he got back, everyone had found out what Parker did to Koda. They were hard on her. Everyone knew how well he treated her and took care of her so they thought it was stupid of her to cheat on Koda the way she did. Girls were constantly trying to steal Koda from Parker only to find out how faithful and committed to Parker he was.

Eli and Milo had finally gotten him to come to a house party with them. He did what his mama told him to do. He got dressed, did his hair and got himself together.

As the cousins walked into the house party, a girl bumped into Koda. He caught her around her waist before she could fall to the floor. When he opened his mouth to apologize, she stopped him.

"Don't," she smiled, "It was my fault. I'm clumsy."

"But still," Koda said still holding onto her, "You aight?"

"Yeah, I'm good. I promise."

"Aight then, sweetheart. You be careful." He nodded letting her go

"I'll try."

She laughed as she walked off. Koda watched her until Eli smacked his arm playfully.

"My boy is back!"

The laughing cousins moved quickly through the party to the kitchen. Milo grabbed them each a beer and passed them to his cousins.

"Here, here," Milo laughed raising his beer, "To our cousin. Haven't been single but a week and half and already got girls tripping over him!"