#I’ve recorded it because I’ve never seen a ghostbusters movie all the way through(in a long time for a few of them)

[idkbishsss]

I said I would write today, but I ended up think a little too much and decided to watch Ghostbuster(my new obsession btw) and listening to music all night💀

[thefanficmonster]

Kick Some Ghost Ass

”Until Dawn Gang x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warnings: Swearing, Sex jokes (excuse my bad humor)

Genre: CRACK, Humor

Summary: It’s one thing when trouble finds this gang, but why don’t we take a look at what happens when they go actively looking for trouble. Needless to say, chaos ensues and no one is spared. Some are more affected than others, and some are dead-ass traumatized, but isn’t that just how life is in general?

Requested by my dearest ever - Until Dawn Anon. Hi lovely! I’ve missed writing your requests and I’m really happy to be back, creating another chaotic fic! I’m sorry it has taken me so long to post it but here it finally is - crazy as ever! I hope you enjoy it! Love you to Blackwood Pines and back baby ❤❤❤

I don’t know how I’ve found myself in this situation but I’m not complaining. If I get to do dumb crazy shenanigans with my crew, I’m ready for just about anything. Not to mention I’m no stranger to ghost hunting. I’m that kid that made DIY Ouija boards and took them to cemeteries with their terrified friends. You should’ve seen us leaving after capturing no ghostly activity - my friends relieved as fuck, and me pissed as fuck.

But today, I’m not expecting nor will I be accepting any disappointment. Especially not with Jess swearing on her Chanel purse that she wasn’t making things up when she said she had a haunted house she wanted us to visit. I must say, I appreciate this group’s enthusiasm when it comes to the paranormal. Never have I had someone who catches my vibe on the subject so well, let alone an entire gang all sharing the same opinion as me - that ghosts, demons and poltergeists are so fucking cool. Sure, Emily took a bit of convincing and Jess is not one to give a shit about the other world creatures invisible to the human eye, but something allegedly happened that changed her mind.

Her a-hundred-and-something-year-old great-grandmother passed away recently and though the death itself didn’t shake Jess up as much as it probably should’ve, the events that followed led to this moment right now - the eleven of us pooling out of two minivans that have pulled up to a terrifying looking house in a wooded are of the suburbs. Jess literally gathered us all on an ‘emergency meeting’ in the courtyard of our college just so she could explain the situation in detail - she doesn’t do well with explaining things in general, let alone when she’s hysterical - so we only understood what she was trying to say when she mentioned the word ‘ghost’. That’s when we all started listening more closely, with the exception of Emily, Beth and Sam but the latter two were intrigued despite trying yo hide it. You can only imagine how excited Josh, Chris and I were, Mike and Matt following a close second behind. Ash was a tiny bit more hesitant but Chris convinced her to give in. And just like that, a week later, here we are.

“I gotta ask, did your great-gran own a VHS player? Or a chest in the attic? Bonus points if there’s a creepy, child-sized doll in there.“ Josh asks as he yanks all the equipment he insisted we bring out of the trunk of the minivan.

“Quit fucking around, Josh! This is serious!“ Jess complains from the spot she’s standing in, shivering in the cold autumn breeze.

“Yeah, Josh! VHS players, creepy dolls, that’s all child’s play.“ I scold him as I pull on my jacket, wrapping it around me more tightly, “Shit gets serious when there’s a secret basement.“

“Y/N!“ Jess shrieks in exasperation. Honesty, how am I supposed to NOT bother her when doing the opposite is so much easier and brings more amusement? “You’re not helping!“

“Wasn’t trying to.“ I wink at her, driving her into a new level of fury that almost leads her to chuck her phone at me. If it weren’t such a prized possession of hers, I’m pretty sure she would’ve chucked it with the intention of knocking me dead. I’m lucky she has the aim of a drunk toddler that spun around fifteen times.

“Hey, quit pissing my girlfriend off, will ya?!“ Mike, who is basically halfway inside the trunk of the other van calls out to us.

I roll my eyes but choose to let it slide. However, someone else doesn’t. Emily does a dramatic turn on her heel, turning to face Mike, or at least the only part of him which is visible. You can imagine how hard it is arguing with an ass like THAT. I don’t know how Emily does it but oh well, I guess I do it too, in a way.

“So it’s girlfriend now, huh? No space between the words?“ Oh that smile she’s flashing him, it could make the Devil himself shiver. I find it kinda hot though - it means shit’s about to go down or hit the fan, either way, the rest of us will be entertained.

Mikey boy straightens up, gracing the rest of us by-standers with his dazzling features. Nah, I’m capping. I honestly think Mike is as attractive as I am patient - very little, almost not at all. It’s surprising how him and Jess are now apparently together since I always pegged her to be the superficial type.

“Got a problem with that, Em?“ He asks, eyebrow raising, head tilting to the side. Oh yeah, it’s on now. But, as someone who’s been quite excited to do some ghost hunting, and also as a representative of the peanut gallery formed of the rest of us who find it amusing and annoying, I feel the need to cut it short before it goes where it shouldn’t. I came to see some exorcist shit, not Keeping Up With The Bitter Exs.

“Jess, I sure hope your grandma is a blood-thirsty ghost cause I can think of at least two people I’d serve to her on a silver platter.“ I snatch the keys the blond has been jingling nervously between her fingers and jog up the stairs to the front door.

Ok I maybe overexaggerated the eeriness of the house. It sure wouldn’t sit right with you if you saw it around sunset or at night, especially not if it’s foggy, but a horror movie house it is most certainly isn’t. It’s pristine and well kept, not a single crack in the walls, the only reason it’s unsettling is because: 1) We’ve all seen a few too many horror movies; 2) There’s been reports of ‘ghostly activity’ - as far as Jess is to be trusted.

While I’m surfing through all the keys, checking each and every single one of them on the door because the real key is unmarked, I can’t help but overhear the conversation going on behind me on the porch.

“Can you believe we got all this in a single day and for a discount on top of all?! Whoever says Craigslist sucks isn’t doing it right.“ Chris’ enthusiasm over the deal him and Josh got on the ghost hunting equipment has been what’s keeping a wide grin on his face this whole time. Though I’m proud of my boys for not getting murdered by the Craigslist seller, I must say I hate that I lost the bet we had - I had to pay them each ten bucks if they didn’t get scammed/kidnapped/murdered and I’m now twenty bucks poorer. I’m not saying I value those twenty bucks more than my friends, though my broke ass needs all the bucks it has and all the dollar bills it could get, but Lord knows I hate losing.

“Yeah, and the guy was only mildly sketchy.“ Josh adds just as excitedly and proudly, “To be honest, Cochise and I were probably the scary looking ones in that parking lot.“

A look over my shoulder shows the twins, Sam, Matt and Ash giving the duo skeptical and somewhat disappointing looks and shakes of their heads. I’ll admit, the equipment is in very good condition and it’s the complete set for ghost-hunting, according to BuzzFeed at least. I’m impressed with the purchase - probably had something to do with how scary Chris and Josh actually look. The all-nighters we’ve all been pulling lately have taken a toll on them worst with the dark circles and bags under their hollow eyes, pale faces and brains turned to mush. I know I’d give them a discount to avoid them pulling out meat cleavers on me.

“That’s all fine and dandy guys, but do you know how to work any of this?“ Sam asks, hesitantly lifting the EMF reader and turning it in her hand, analyzing it with a curious gaze. 

Josh and Chris exchange a look before the former replies, “Just the cameras and voice recorder, the rest falls on them.” He points a finger at me and laughs, “Though they aren’t able to work something as simple as keys, they are more than qualified to be a ghostbuster.”

“You know, Josh, jokes on you, I can work keys! Jess, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to be able to work well with organizing things, hence my problem with these keys.“ I hurl the bunch of keys connected my a scarlet keychain at Josh, “Lemme demonstrate my true skills.“ I hop down the flight of stone stairs and approach the pile of equipment the guys have created smack-dab in the middle of the house’s driveway. 

“Oh, I gotta see this!” Mr. Ex-Class-President all but runs over, frowning when we all turn to look at him just as I pick up the spirit box to show off how it works, “Oh that’s what you meant. So you aren’t taking your clothes off?“

Jess and I are alike in one thing - the need we feel to chuck objects at people who piss us off. “You’re girlfriend is, like, right behind you, Munroe. Have some decency!”

“I was gonna enjoy a show as well, but I’m guessing we won’t be getting one.“ The girlfriend in question replies, looking at me quizzically as though that’s gonna convince me into discarding my outfit.

“No, unless you’re a ghost.“ I point the device I’m holding at Mike, “But if your boyfriend here keeps acting up I might turn him into one.“

“That sounds kinda kinky.“ Beth’s comment surprises me. The wink she sends me even more so. “And I kinda like it.“

Ok, ok, ok, hold on. 

Flirting with Munroe is one thing, but Beth is a completely different story. I can be threatening Mike with a knife one moment and cracking sex jokes with him over cold beer the next. While Beth actually has the ability to get me flustered and blushing, and my close relationship with her brother doesn’t help. Mother fucker can just whack me upside the head every time he catches me fussing over my silly crush on his sister.

“Ew, you too! Keep it in your pants or at least get a room.“ Emily doesn’t miss a beat when it comes to being herself. She’s truly a garbage bin full of treasure.

“We’d do the latter if SOMEONE could get the door open.” I glare daggers at Josh who is making hopeless attempts at what I was doing earlier - unlocking that damn door.

“I’d be more than happy to come through for you ladies.“ Mike says, getting in a stance of a runner before a race, his body directly opposite the door.

Oh I can’t wait to see where this is going. I SHOULD RECORD IT.

“Mike, it’s still breaking and entering and it’s still against the law even if the person’s dead.“ Sam points out, entering her mother-like mode, ruining the fun and causing me to pout at her. She gives me a look of disappointment - one worse than I’ve ever seen on my parents - so I just shut my trap before she can also express said disappointment through words and have me feeling guilty for the rest of the day.

A loud crash suddenly echoes causing us to turn our heads to look for the source of the terrifyingly startling sound. One glance is all it takes to put our minds at ease and a second one is enough to provoke different reactions in all of us - the broken window telling the story of where Josh has disappeared.

“What did I just say about breaking and entering?!“ Sam shouts after him while the vast majority of us are cracking up like hyaenas. Jess is just gaping at the broken window next to the front door in disbelief. She obviously can’t decide whether to join in on the fun or serve as back-up to Sam. Josh did technically damage private property that’s partially hers, but if you ask me it serves her right for not marking her keys.

“Sorry, I was too busy breaking the window to hear that part of the conversation!“ Josh’s apologetic smile appears on the other side of glassless frame. I can’t tell if he’s genuinely sorry or holding back laughter but either way, he looks innocent enough for Sam to let him off the hook as long as he doesn’t cause any more trouble - in which case: tough luck. Chris, Josh and I are nothing if not troublemakers, especially when we’re together. Chris tones it down when Ash’s around, and the same goes for Josh with Sam while I’m simply problematic regardless of who’s watching. My chaos is untamable, it’s a blessing and a curse and I love it, even though it’s landed me in hot water more than once. It’s nice to be around people on the same wavelength - chaos resides within this group and not a single one of us can hide it.

“At least we have a way in now.“ Ash offers Josh a helping hand in this argument after she recovers from the overwhelming fit of laughter. “I hope the broken window doesn’t anger your gran, Jess.“

The blond snaps out of her trance briefly, “No, she was a very sweet lady, but damn is Josh creative!” She hurries to correct herself, “Destructively creative.”

I hurry to correct her once again, “Chaotically creative.”

“Guys, do you mind coming in? It’s very creepy standing here alone!“ Josh calls out to us, looking over his shoulder at the interior of the house, “I’m expecting to be snatched and dragged to that secret basement we mentioned.“

“Mention it one more time and I swear to God-!“ Jess screams, fists tightened.

Before her angry wrath could crash atop us, we all make our way into the house through the broken window, carefully avoiding the shards of glass strewn about. One step inside and we’re met with the upmost of horror clichés - a drop in temperature. We’re all wearing thick hoodies because the weather outside is chilly in and of itself, but said hoodies aren’t as efficient at holding the house’s cold at bay and away from out skin.

Chris and Matt make their way in last, carrying the equipment consisting of three cameras, flashlights for everyone, an EMF reader, a spirit voice box, a voice recorder and a motion detector. I help them hand a light to each group member as well as a ghost-hunting device before we venture onward.

“If I were your grandma’s ghost, I’d be ten times more pissed about that window. It looks to me like that lady payed a lot of attention to keeping things in order.“ Matt comments while he examines the expensive looking painting hanging in the hallway.

I hear Emily scoff, “Unlike some.” but the remark is said so quickly and quietly I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who heard it.

Jess laughs, “She did like things in order, but she was never as strict as you might think. As I said, she was very sweet.“

“So do you just not take after her at all or were you adopted?“ Emily’s remarks are no longer a mumbled jumble of words, “No, nevermind, of course you’re not adopted. Your parents are smart people, they wouldn’t have chosen you if they had the chance.“

Jess laughs again, much more menacingly this time, causing me to exchange a look with Hannah who’s walking beside me. “Twenty bucks says one of them isn’t making it out of here.” It’s just a matter of time, to be honest. If not the lodge, or any party we’ve ever attended as a group, this haunted house is the perfect opportunity for a murder. We could even argue it was a ghost.

Luckily, the two cats clawing at each other’s throats don’t overhear, “No, my parents aren’t stupid, but your boyfriend clearly is. He chooses to date you! Or are you holding him captive or something.“

Ok that’s enough. I can tolerate a lot of things, but people calling one of my best friends stupid is not something I’m about to put up with, “How dare you call one of my hoes stupid?” I sneer at Jess, eyes narrowing.

“I thought I was your hoe too!“ She fights back, looking almost offended.

“Even more reason you shouldn’t have called him that! I don’t tolerate my hoes not respecting each other.“ 

I don’t get to see where this argument goes because Ashley’s shriek echoes throughout the hallway, stealing mine as well as the attention of everyone else. 

“There’s a ghost in here!“ Making it to the doorway of the room she’s in first, I peak my head inside and see the EMF reader she’s holding going nuts as if it’s detected something.

“Don’t worry, Ash, there’s a dead cactus here. That’s not the ghost we’re looking for, is it?“ Chris, my amazingly bright friend says, quirking an eyebrow suggesting that remark was nothing short of dead-ass serious.

“Chris, darling, that’s not how it works. Cactuses are plants.“ I point out as sweetly as I can as to mask my laughter.

“Don’t the same ghostly rules apply?“ The genuine look of confusion he gives me almost makes me lose it.

“Ok children, leave the room, we need to set up a motion detector to be sure.“ Beth says with a tone that suggests she’s more than over our insanity. Jeez, count on her and Sam to start parenting us through our chaos. They are of high authority, must admit - one genuinely feels bad if they don’t comply to whatever these two girls demand.

We all pile out in the hallway while the twins set up this interesting motion detector with green dots. I don’t know what Jess’ granny looked like, but I bet that even the most unattractive of people would look hella good with this lighting. Thankfully the room is dark enough with the shutters closed and the curtains drawn, allowing the dots to be perfectly visible.

We stare at the minimalistic room littered with fluorescent green dots on every surface for maybe a minute or two but not much happens to the disappointment to some and relief to others. However, as if not wanting to let us down, the ghost makes a shy appearance if the shift of the green dots is anything to go by.

“Oh shit, is that a ghost?“ Chris whispers, sounding as amazed as I feel in this moment.

“It better be.“ I mutter in response, refusing to blink and risk missing anything important.

The sudden presence of the obnoxious noise of the spirit voice box makes us all jump. As I turn my head to glare at whoever’s using it, Josh speaks up. “Are you an attractive ghost?”

“Josh, that’s my great-grandmother, you ass!“ Jess barks with disgust in her voice.

In the meantime, I catch glimpse of Mike rolling up his sleeves. Oh shit, this ain’t good.

“I’ve been waiting for this!“ He shouts victoriously, cracking his knuckles.

Knowing this won’t end well, the first thing I do is snatch the camera from Chris’ hands and turn it on.

“Um, Mike, what do you mean?“ Sam’s back to being concerned, turning to the rest of us when Mike doesn’t give her a response, “What’s he gonna do?“

“Fight it.“ I answer as though it’s the most normal thing to ever have been done, “Or, ash he calls it - kick some ghost ass.“

“A freaking ghost?! He’s gonna try to tussle with something he can’t see?“ I can’t tell if Matt’s tone is disbelief, amusement or disappointment, but I believe he isn’t about to try and stop or dear ex-president in his pursuit and that’s all that matters. I ain’t about to let someone stop whatever’s about to go down from going down.

“That’s still my great-grandmother, you dumbass!“ Jess shrieks with something alike terror.

“Don’t worry Jess, I’m sure she’ll go easy on him.“ I say in an attempt to reassure her but I can’t even be bothered really, I’m too laser-focused on the circus that’s about to take place in front of me.

Mike, as if encouraged by my words, charges into the room. Much to his dismay, before he could even reach the ghost, he’s met with a much more vigorous enemy - the carpet. The rascal trips him up and Mr. Munroe falls flat on his face.

The group stays silent, looking at the glorious aftermath of the glorious fall. Told ya these lights could make everything fabulous. Must say, it’s truly an honor for me to have been able to catch all that on tape.

“10/10, would ghost-hunt with Mikey Munroe again.“

[smokeybrandreviews]

Smokey brand Retrospective: Red Pill Me

Cinemacon has passed and there has been a lot of awesome sh*t revealed. On the top of that list, obviously, Spider-Man: Far From Home has me geeked to high heaven but there were a ton of other noteworthy reveals. There was some Batman reveals, a few Mission Impossible 7 and Top Gun 2 trailers, plus audiences ever got a surprise screening of Ghostbusters: Afterlife. Now, that would be great on it's own but cats even got a little sizzle real for Matrix Resurrections: The long gestating fourth Matrix film. Apparently, this thing is releasing in December. I am lukewarm at best. I have fond memories of the Matrix trilogy as a whole but, since it’s final release some twenty years ago, the Wachowskis have been revealed to be one trick ponies. They kind of suck at film making. I mean, i liked Speed Racer but i just generally enjoy Speed Racer. It helped tremendously that Christina Ricci was Trixie, too, but everything after that was kind of balls. I also really like V for Vendetta but that’s not real their movie, they just adapted it. I guess you can say that about Speed Racer, too. Anyway, in light of there near Shyamalan-esque track record with their films, i wanted to revisit the first three Matrix films and see if they hold up, to try and muster some sense of excitement for what comes next.

The Matrix

Of the trilogy, this is easily the best film. Everything about it is exceptional. The Matrix was a whole ass shift in the cultural zeitgeist. It was a lot of people’s first experience with accessible cyberpunk and I'll always love it for that. I’ll also love it for normalizing Hong Kong style action sequences and giving us the most breathtaking application of Bullet Time I've seen to date. The Matrix s why the theater exists. If you’ve never seen this thing on the big screen, you missed out on something very special. I had just just turned thirteen when it released and checked it out at the dollar theater. I had only ever seen anything like this, in anime. Seeing all of my favorite Eighties OVAs filtered through the big budget Hollywood lens was incredible. I even like the rather pedestrian narrative. I think the story worked for what the movie was trying to do. It’s a shame the Wachowskis have tried to rewrite history about the narrative as of late. I understand the underlying themes of identity and sexuality but come on? That’s some college film theory bullsh*t that got tacked on after the fact. Now, if the original script is to be believed, then, yes, all of that, but what we got is not so profound. This is a basic Chosen One narrative with Dope ass effects that were ahead of it’s time.

A fr as the cast, what can i say? These motherf*ckers were perfect. Keanu Reeves as Neo was inspired. It’s wild to say that because dude is a plank but it works. He’s the POV character, he’s who you see that world through. Making him a blank slate so to speak, helps with immersion and that is a world you definitely wan to be immersed within. This was my first experience with Carrie-Ann Moss and I've loved her ever since. Her Trinity fast became one of my favorite characters and I'm actually pretty excited to see where she is in the new film. Lawrence Fishburne as Morpheus was an interesting choice. I wasn’t mad and it worked perfectly but it was weird seeing him in such an active, action oriented, role. That said, for me, this movie is made by Hugo Weaving. He is absolutely monstrous as Agent Smith. He’s got this scene chewing energy that mirrors Christoph Waltz’s Hans Landa and we all know how much i love that Nazi f*ck so that’s really high praise. To this day, I've got his Humanity is a Virus speech memorized. It was just that f*cking good! The Matrix is an exquisite watch and it is absolutely mandatory viewing if you consider yourself a fan of cinema.

The Matrix Reloaded

Whoo, boy, talk about a drop in quality. Reloaded released four years later in 2003 and it screams Studio Mandate. I was a sprightly eighteen years old when this thing dropped and made it a point to see it opening day. I really enjoyed the first outing so i figured this one would be just as amazing. Indeed, i remember leaving the theater thinking to myself how decent of a sequel it turned out to be. It wasn’t better than the first but it didn’t sh*t the bed like most follow-ups do. Fast forward to present day and, after watching this thing again for the first time in probably fifteen years, it’s kind of f*cking bad. Like, as a cinematic experience, it’s pretty tight Everything is amped up. Tons more action, way more bombastic set pieces, stakes have been raised considerably; The Matrix Reloaded is everything you want in a summer blockbuster sequel. However, that’s it. Everything else is worse. The acting has become way too hammy and the new cast members fit into this narrative like a square peg in a round hole. Why is f*cking Niobe even in this thing? Who even is the Merovingian? Why is Mouse? The pacing is all over the place, too. Like, this thing stops dead in it’s tracks on several occasions but that’s not the worst of it.

The worst thing is the narrative. What the f*ck even is the story trying to be told in this movie? It doesn’t make any f*cking sense. The Matrix was, very obviously, a standalone film. That was a closed narrative. Neo’s story had been told. Everything after that is unnecessary. This movie is an exercise in the unnecessary. I appreciate all of how unchained and manic Smith is in this but, outside of that, what the f*ck was the point of this whole narrative? It’s filler. This movie is filler and it feels like it. The returning cast is serviceable and seeing Zion was interesting. I like how all the survivors are just sweaty black people. I literally hated everyone added to the cast though. Well, that’s not quite true. I rather enjoyed Collin Chou as Seraph. Dude was inconsequential but i love seeing Asian martial artists not name Li or Chan getting some shine. Also, Monica Bellucci is in this and i kind of just love her in general. Her Persephone is absolutely disposable but she looks damn fine in that plastic wrapped dress of hers. I literally can’t be bothered mentioning anyone else. They are that forgettable. This movie is that forgettable. And it’s arguably the best of the two sequels.

The Matrix Revolutions

Talk about going out with a thud. Man, i saw this with my best friend, rest in peace B, and we both hated it. He was an even bigger fan of The Matrix than i was so his disappointment was palpable. I’ll never forget his visceral reaction when that rainbow spread across the super happy Hollywood ending. Dude was hot and he had every right to be. The first Matrix set up this intriguing, immersive, world full of fanatic visuals, great piratical stunts, and a very through provoking premise. The second Matrix was your basic Hollywood sequel; More shine, less substance. But Revolutions? Man this is peak Wachowski fail. You saw hints of this messiah sh*t in the first, it’s literally a Chosen One narrative, but thy went all in on that sh*t in Reloaded. By the time Revolutions finished, this whole narrative was so far up it’s own ass, it didn’t know which way was up. It just f*cking ends. Everyone is dead and it’s over. The Wachowskis went heavy on the Jesus imagery, they were not subtle, and the f*cking conflict just ends. Robot don’t stop using people as batteries. Flesh and blood Humans still have to live in Zion. The only thing that’s changed is Neo’s dead and Agent Smith has been deleted. That’s it. The Matrix still exists, people are still trapped in it, and everything that happened in these films doesn’t f*cking matter. Literally right back at the start of the whole goddamn conflict. Revolutions is so f*cking disappointing, dude, by every measure of that metric.

Hugh Weaving is still pretty good as Smith and Keanu does his best imitation of white bread as Neo but, like, everything else is just so pedestrian. Plus, this thing is long. Like, unreasonably so. Why the f*ck is this movie two hours? The entire trilogy is kind of like that but it’s most egregious in this one. This story could be told in ninety minutes, just like Reloaded. Why the f*ck do i have an extra half hour of bullsh*t in this? Like, that whole “Neo Lost” arc was unnecessary, in both sequels. F*cking why? I don’t hate Revolutions. It’s not a “bad” film per say, it’s just disappointing. It’s the poster child for the law of diminishing returns. The Matrix Revolutions is the what happens when you let creatives with fresh egos, run amok with one hundred and fifty million f*cking dollars. So much spectacle but even less substance that Reloaded and that motherf*cker was a hollow mess. Still, The Matrix Revolutions is better than anything Michael Bay or Zack Snyder has ever made so i guess it’s got that going for it.

[willow-salix]

Day 98 of Isolation on Tracy Island and no one is moving today, well, me, Virgil and Alan are fine physically but we are being lazy and hanging out on the couches with the rest of the ones that had attempted to hula hoop. The thing with hooping is that it takes weeks to toughen up your skin and muscles to cope with such a pounding as they will get from 2kilos of hoop slamming into them over and over at speed, I’d warned them, they hadn’t listened. Them of the rock hard abs had thought they had it covered, now they are regretting being so cocky and are laying around groaning every time they try to move.

We were laying there like sloths refusing to move (yes, John is wearing his rodeo shirt and I am wearing my hideous T-shirt and no, neither of us are complaining because we are adults) me because I had no real reason to need to move and I’d much rather lay there and veg than actually deal with moving and them because they were hurting.

They were all lying around in various poses of ouch, Scott was draped artfully in one of the bucket seats, looking relaxed but I knew the real reason was because the curved back was actually helping him get in and out of it, he had his tablet with him and was apparently catching up on some admin, but I know him and I know the look on his face and it definitely wasn't paperwork he was looking at. My money would be on him watching a movie with the subtitles on.

Alan was playing a hand held video game with Gordon, Virgil was tinkling on the piano working on a new composition which was actually a fascinating process to watch, he’d hum a little, plink out a few notes, hum again, play with a little variation and then write it down.

John was stretched out on the couch, his back resting against my chest because apparently I'm comfier and I was being nice by rubbing his abused stomach soothingly. I had stolen my ipod back from Scott and had my headphones on and was seriously vibing, totally chilled out and just loving life when the comm on Jeff’s desk beeped.

I allowed John to sit up from his prone position stretched across my lap and helped drag him to his feet when he couldn’t get his abdominals to obey his commands.

“Not so fun when it’s happening to you, is it,” Virgil laughed, earning himself a level 4 John glare, patent pending. But Space man was still lighter on his feet than the lumbering elephant Virgil had been doing an impression of and was soon easing gently into the desk chair.

“Yes EOS? Is everything alright?”

“Yes, I believe so,” she answered.

“Then is there something I can help with?”

“I think we have another one of those calls, but I’m not sure so I thought you should listen first.”

John rolled his eyes and Scott groaned.

“Put it through then, thanks, EOS.”

“Hello?” a young sounding voice spoke over the comms.

“This is International Rescue, how may we be of assistance today?” John asked, immediately slipping into his calm, capable work tone.

“Hello,” the sound of a muffled giggle could be heard somewhere in the background and John lifted his hand to cut the call. I jumped into action, slashing my hand at him in a ‘don’t you dare’ gesture. We were all bored, but I had an idea of how to make it better.

I sat down on the edge of the desk and made a continue motion with my hand.

“Can I have your name, caller?”

“Erm...name?”

“Yes, it’s standard procedure.”

“My...my name's Yuri,” another muffled giggle. “Yuri Nator.”

Alan and Gordon snorted with laugher, although Scott didn't look impressed and neither did John, Virgil just looked resigned to the fact that all teenagers were idiots. I could understand that one.

I gestured for him to let me take over and launched into my best impression of Janine from Ghostbusters.

“International Rescue, what do you want?”

This time even Scott sniggered. John, being John, lent back in his chair and let me work my magic, he’d seen this happen far too many times.

“So, Mr Nator, can you tell me a bit about your situation?” I continued.

“Well, I’m trapped.”

“Trapped, OK let me just pull up my forms for trapped citizens,” I paused for a few seconds then continued. “On a scale of one to ten how trapped would you say you are?”

“How trapped?”

“It’s not a hard question, how trapped are we talking? Have you just got a smashed ankle or have you lost your whole leg? Have you had to gnaw off any of your own limbs? Come on kid, time is money, you know we charge by the minute, right? This is going on your phone bill.”

“Trapped erm...maybe a five?”

“Five, alright, now where are you trapped on a scale of one to ten, one being you tripped over a hole in the sidewalk and a twig landed on you and ten being you are currently held hostage under the sea by three mermaids and a whale?”

Gordon buried his face in a pillow to stop his laughter carrying across the room.

“Maybe a three?”

“Three, alright, trapped down a well, got it. Now, do you have any friends or relatives with you?”

“No, I’m alone,” frantic whispering was heard over the line.

“Totally alone, OK, I’ll add Billy no mates to your record, nearly done, just a few more questions before I pass you over to the relevant department head. Now, can you tell me if you are wearing pants or shorts today, please?”

“Erm...pants.”

“Has wet his pants, added to your case file. Now, Yuri Nator with the wet pants, can you please confirm your location?”

“I’m..not sure?”

“Tracing your calls to find your location I’ll add lost idiot to your file, transferring you now and thank you for using International Rescue as your rescuing service today.” I beckoned Gordon over and I swear I’ve never seen him move so fast, even with his sore tummy, although he had to take a deep breath before talking.

“Hey, this is the water rescue department, how may I help you today?”

“Erm...nothing, I’m fine. All good here.”

“My file says that you are a Yuri Nator and have wet your pants because you were scared when you fell down a well. Is that correct? Can I just ask you if Timmy is down there with you?”

“Timmy? I don’t think so, I don’t know anyone named Timmy.”

“No Timmy, check. Any Lassie’s? Because if there is a Lassie I’m afraid that is out of our jurisdiction and we’ll have to pass this case over to animal control.”

“No Lassie.”

“No Lassie, good to hear, you’d really know you’re in trouble if they bring out the big dogs.”

“Dogs?”

“Yep, dogs. Now, the problem we’re going to have is that being in a well, it’s going to be a bit too snug to maneuver Thunderbird Four down there, so we’re going to have to come up with an alternative plan. I’m going to pass you over to our logistics department to follow up on your case. Have a great day, don’t let the well piranhas bite you too hard, that will invalidate your rescuers insurance. Thanks for using us as your rescuers today.”

Gordon handed the call over to Scott, who took it on his comm, not wanting to move from his comfy spot.

“Logistics department,” Scott barked out in his toughest commander voice, the one that every one of his younger brothers knew meant big trouble. “I’m going to ask you some questions, you just have to say yes or no, got it?”

There was silence on the other end of the call.

“I asked you a question, do you understand me?”

There was a rattling sound as the phone was passed around a few times and then went dead.

John hit a button and called the number back.

“Hello?” a different voice answered.

“We know where you are, we know where you live, we know where this phone is registered, we are sending help to your location. We were told that you are trapped and as animal control is not involved we will be continuing our attempt to rescue you,” John informed him, just managing to hold in a laugh until Scott took over again.

"Logistics, do you have a basic education? Yes or no?"

"Yes?"

"You don't sound so sure of that. Do you have any plans to attend college?"

"Maybe?"

"Useless layabout, got it. Have you ever thrown up on a ride?"

"N-no…"

"The truth, now!"

"Yes."

"Adding will blow chunks to your case file. Have you tried to get yourself out of your situation?"

"No."

"Not very resourceful, got it. Now, how did you get into your current situation, did you trip, fall while looking or were you pushed?"

"I...tri- no I fell in."

"Adding clumsy idiot to your file, passing you over to the next department."

Virgil grinned as he took over.

“This is the International Rescue land rescue department, I'm the ground control operator,” he told them as Alan came and sat down beside him on the piano stool.

“We’ve been told that you are trapped down a well and that a water rescue is not possible so we need to determine if we can attempt a land rescue,” he continued in his most pleasant voice.

“Land rescue?”

“But the problem with a land rescue is that we’d have to drill down under the foundations of the well and try to break through its outer core, there is a number of risks involved in this, including drowning, crushing, cave in, impaling with a large drill and suffocation as the air is sucked out. Can we just ask which would be your preferred risk to take?”

“Risk?” the voice on the phone sounded even younger and now completely terrified.

“There’s always risks involved, kid. Do I take it that none of these options appeal to you?”

“N-no they don’t.”

“Then I have no choice but to pass you on to our space department. Have a nice rescue.”

“Space department here, how may I rescue you today?” Alan joined in, already enjoying himself.

“Space rescue? I’m not in space.”

“No, but you will be! Isn’t that cool?”

“I’ll be in space?”

“Yeah, the plan is to lower a rope down to you from Thunderbird Three. Then you’ll tie it around your waist, make sure you tie that sucker good and tight, we don’t want you coming undone half way up now, do we?”

“No?”

“That is correct. Also, remember not to hold your breath when you leave earth's atmosphere or your lungs will explode. Got it?”

“What? Explode?” the caller’s voice had taken on a fearfully high pitch.

“Uh oh, I can now confirm that we have added a code brown to the wet pants situation, Thunderbird Two. Caller, are you still there? We’ll be there to pick you up in an hour, be ready to see some stars!”

“No! I’m sorry, we lied, no one is in trouble, we’re sorry, we’re so sorry. Please don’t tell our moms or charge us for the call. We won’t do it again.”

“Tell your friends!” Alan chirped as John hung up the call.

We were silent for a second or two before we all burst out laughing, which led to many painful groans as sore stomachs protested. But it had certainly cheered us up.

[andysawesometoybox]

Real Ghostbusters: Firehouse. Kenner. 1987

I’m just going to say it: Kenner’s Real Ghostbusters toy line is one of the greatest toy lines’ to ever hit shops. Ever. The End.

I would not be the person I am today without these toys, along with Star Trek from Playmates and Batman. Any Batman.

Let’s cast our minds back to the mid 1980’s! Ghostbusters was everywhere. We’d had the first movie at the tail end of ’84 and then the animated series in ’86. And what does a good cartoon need? A toy line! In fact, the vast majority of cartoon’s in the ‘80’s (and today if we’re being honest) were really just over the top toy adverts and really, Ghostbusters was no different. So toys were needed fast. In steps titan toymaker, Kenner. 

Kenner had an incredible track record at the time having created the DC Superpowers line and oh yeah, STAR WARS! So, to say that Kenner in the ’80’s was on a roll would be a huge understatement.

As I said, the Real Ghostbusters toy line from Kenner was massively responsible for shaping my childhood. It was a vast toy line with a massive assortment of figures and vehicles (all of which I will look at in the future), but it only had one proper play set: 

The Firehouse

To me, Kenner’s Firehouse is one of THE greatest play sets ever made. When you really look at it, it’s a pretty simple toy. It’s a building. More basic than that, it’s just a big hollow box with two whole levels, 1 balcony level and a pretty cool fireman’s pole (more on that later). 

But, to me, that hollowness is one of this play sets greatest assets. As a kid, you filled that space with your imagination. It may sound corny, but it’s absolutely true. To me, the mark of a truly good play set is the ability to use it beyond the brand that it was created for. I cannot tell you of all the different toys that this play set played headquarters to. From the great Transformers/M.A.S.K war that my brother and I would play, to a strange parallel world that my Star Trek away team would discover. Or when He-Man would come over and visit the Ghostbusters just because we could. And they never seemed out of place, because it was a building. But that does not take away from the awesomesness of this piece.

It has the two walls, front and site and then a huge cut away for easy access inside. The vast space inside could easily be taken up by the placement of the Ghostbusters’ car, ECTO-1. Now, I’ve seen this set critized in the past because Kenner didn’t make it long enough to truly house the car, but I don’t agree with that. Sure, if you try to make the car stay inside the building, it’ll either roll out the back or push through the double doors at the front, but I didn’t care as a kid and I sure as hell don’t care now. As a display piece as an adult, I kinda dig the look of Old ECTO bursting through the doors, it looks awesome. The only issue with having the car inside the Firehouse is that it doesn’t leave much room for the figures on that floor. But that’s why you have other levels! 

The upper level, which spands the entire thing, thus being a complete floor. It’s bare but has some figure pegs over the large grate in the middle of the floor (more on that in a bit). It also has the fireman’s pole attached at the top. I LOVE THIS THING. To simulate the famous pole from both the movie and the cartoon, Kenner created this system where you attach a figure onto the red platform, two figures work best for balance but it will work with one, then, on the roof, you flick the switch and that activates the pole! The platform, with figure(s) attached, begins to spin down the thread of the pole at great speed before landing at the ground floor. It’s frigging great! Yeah, ok, it is annoying to have to thread the damn thing up again each time, but I really never really cared as a kid and it never got old. Kenner created a pretty good way recreate the pole from the film/cartoon. Sure Playmobil’s version probably makes more sense, but as a kid, this was rad!

The decals that come with the set adds to it. We’ve got a picture of a scary looking old woman on the upper floor (who actually has her own figure and is totally a scary ghost!). We have some book shelves on the middle level, giving us the idea that this is where Egon and Ray would do their research, and on the bottom level, we have decals of various looking industrial type contraptions that no doubt helps the ‘Busters in their never ending battle against the paranormal! I will say, that this set also comes with a full on ECTO Containment unit that you could put the various small ghosts that come with the Ghostbusters figures. I do have it somewhere, but right now, I’m not sure where! It’s rad though.

On the outside, Kenner have done a marvellous job with the sculpt. It looks just like the Firehouse from both the cartoon and the film. Which is a real Firehouse in New York City, by the way. On the side wall, we have more decals of exposed brick, to give us that “rundown” affect. We also have the windows. So yeah, not much going on here, but pffft.

The front as I said really replicates the design of the real building really well. Then we get one of my favourite little pieces, the Ghostbusters sign! This one is actually a replacement that I was lucky enough to find in eBay for a good price. I lost my original years ago and never thought I’d find another, but I did! Wohooo!

This brings us back to the roof.

Like the upper floor, the room has this large grate that lines up perfectly with the one on the upper floor just below it. Everyone who’s ever played with Ghostbusters toys knows what this is for. That’s right. The SLIME!

Slime has always been popular with kids toys and what better toys to use slime with than frigging Ghostbusters! Kenner’s line came with many vats of slime, in many different colours of the life on the toy line. The idea here was to pour the slime through the roof grate, onto the figures waiting on the upper level, that slime would then oooooze down the upper level grate, covering whatever was on the ground floor. I had many of the vats myself and you know what? I hated them!

Seriously, I know that I am in the minority here, but I hated slime as a kid. Still do. Why in the hell would I want to cover my toys in sticky goo that I would then have to wash off later. Or worse, what if I forgot to?! It would dry into this horrible thing and still leave sticky……NO! I’m not having it! This is not something that I’ve come to as I got older, I’ve very much felt this way since I was a kid. I know other collectors are totally cool with it but honestly, keep that crap away from my toys! (picture is Slime from the 2016 Ghostbusters movie toy line)

VERDICT

So, what’s the verdict here?

Honestly, it’s still epic. I’ve owned this thing for well over 30 years and just having it set up on display in my studio, with the toys and car, brings me so much joy every day. I’m not just reminded of all the Ghostbusters fun that I had, but of all the other various toys that my brother and I used it with to play together. So many great memories, all from what is basically a hollowed out box with a Ghostbusters logo on it. Genius.

You can find the Firehouse on eBay pretty easily, but it’s expensive and the price has really gone up a lot recently. I’d imagine it has something to do with Hasbro’s Real Ghostbusters reproduction figures that have recently come out. I have a Winston, he’s awesome and still mint in box! 

I’d be surprised if Hasbro do a reproduction of the Firehouse, but if they did, it would be hugely expensive!

Toy Score: 10/10

[tomeandflickcorner]

Episode Review- The Real Ghostbusters: A Fright at the Opera

I gotta be honest, I have no idea what they were doing with this episode.

It starts with Egon taking Peter to the Metropolitan Opera House to see an opera.  Except Peter shows up in what looks like a t-shirt, bomber jacket and baseball cap. Because he heard Egon say they were going to the Met and thought he meant they were going to see a Mets game. (A joke so old, it has mold growing from it.)  Okay, for starters, what made Egon think Peter would be interested in seeing an opera? No offense to Peter, but he never struck me as the sort who would appreciate the fine and performative arts. Furthermore, did the miscommunication not dawn on either of them until they arrived at the Metropolitan Opera? It’s not as if they arrived separately. They both live at the Firehouse. So why didn’t Egon comment on Peter’s attire before they left?  Finally, I’m surprised that they actually let Peter enter the building dressed like that. Granted I’ve never actually been inside the Metropolitan Opera House, and the website states that there’s no dress code, but isn’t showing up to an opera in anything other than formal attire a severe violation of the unwritten protocol?

In any event, it turns out that the opera that is being performed (the episode states the opera is Ride of the Valkeries, but I’m pretty sure that’s not the name of an actual opera, and it’s merely a very familiar excerpt from the opera Die Walküre) will star a woman known as Diva, the world’s greatest soprano.  Egon reveals that he’s a huge fan of Diva, which is why he wanted to attend the performance.  As he tells Peter, he would give anything to meet her.  During the performance, however, as the conductor leads the opera’s orchestra into performing Ride of the Valkyries, actual Valkyries suddenly materialize within the performance hall, wreaking havoc.  (And full props to the conductor, who we’ll later learn is called Leopold, for not letting himself get distracted and simply continues to conduct.  That’s what I call dedication.)  Amidst the turmoil, one of the Valkyries severs the ropes that are holding up some castle prop, causing it to fall towards the stage, as well as Diva.  Fortunately, Peter manages to push her out of the way in the nick of time.  (Egon had tried to come to her rescue, too, but he ended up bumping into another random actor and therefore didn’t get there in time.)

As the dust settles, and the Valkyries fly off, Diva immediately starts latching onto Peter, expressing her gratitude to him for saving her life.  And she is laying it on thick.  Cutting to the chase, Peter addresses Leopold the Conductor and Metzenbaum, the manager of the Metropolitan Opera House, pointing out that they clearly have a ghost problem.  He asks them how much they’d be willing to pay for the Ghostbusters to deal with it, but Egon cuts him off, stating that they can’t put a price on art and that they’ll therefore offer their services for free.  Metzenbaum agrees to this, requesting that the Ghostbusters return first thing in the morning.

The next morning, the Ghostbusters get ready to return to the Metropolitan Opera House bright and early.  As they gear up, Ray begins to explain what Valkyries are, stating that they’re very powerful spirits in Norse mythology.  As for what they’re doing in New York now, Ray says that they can be awakened by praise, and that singing about them can summon them.  And they won’t rest until they find someone that they can drag off to Valhalla.  (So why don’t actual Valkyries show up every time Ride of the Valkyries is played in movies or TV shows?)  During this scene, we also get Winston asking if they’ll be up against the Phantom of the Opera, which kickstarts a running joke that will continue throughout the episode. Also, Egon briefly attempts to dress up in a very tacky looking white tuxedo, but the others manage to convince him to forgo the tux and simply wear his usual jumpsuit instead.

When the Ghostbusters arrive at the opera house, Diva once again begins latching onto Peter.  She informs Metzenbaum that she’ll require a body guard until the Valkyries are taken care of.  Egon quickly volunteers, stating he would love to get a chance to ask for her thoughts on Toscanini’s interpretation of Pucchini.  Diva, however, turns down his offer, insisting on Peter.  Leopold, who is standing nearby, demands that the Ghostbusters don’t do anything to interrupt his rehearsal.

So while Peter remains behind with Diva in her dressing room, Ray, Egon and Winston proceed to begin their investigation of the opera house, with Metzenbaum informing them that the Valkyries haven’t made any further appearances since last night.  At this point, Winston briefly enters into a conversation with one of stagehands, who informs him that the Phantom of the Opera is indeed there, and that he’d seen him in the basement.  In excitement, Winston passes this information onto Ray and Egon, only to get shot down by Egon, who dismissively states that the Phantom is just a character in a movie.  He even goes so far as to ask Winston who he’s going to believe- him or a guy who pulls ropes.

Okay, first of all, the story of The Phantom of the Opera originated as a novel written by Gaston Leroux, which was initially published as a serialization from September 1909 to January 1910.  The movie that they’re clearly referring to in this episode (the 1925 movie starring Lon Chaney Sr.) was an adaptation of Leroux’ novel, which is something I’d expect a man like Egon to know full well.  Second of all, this episode apparently takes place after X-Mas Marks the Spot, in which the Ghostbusters learned that the events of Charles Dickins’ A Christmas Carol actually happened.   So if Ebenezer Scrooge and Bob Cratchit were real people, it’s entirely possible the Phantom also existed.  And finally, why is Egon being so dismissive towards this stagehand?  Just because this guy ‘pulls ropes,’ it doesn’t mean his word should be disregarded.  It just makes Egon look classist, which is not a good look for him.

Anyway, the three of them began to search through the opera hall, tracking the Valkyries with the PKE Meters.   After climbing up a stairwell that seems rather unrealistically long (how tall is the Metropolitan Opera House, anyway?), they make it up to the roof of the opera house.  Ray is characteristically excited about the whole thing, as this is the first recorded sighting of a Valkyrie in modern times, and he voices his belief that Peter is not happy about missing out.  Of course, Peter is having the time of his life, as he’s being severely pampered and praised by Diva back in her dressing room.  Meanwhile, Leopold is already at work at the rehearsal for the night’s performance.  And we see he is quite strict as a conductor.  As he begins to lead the orchestra through the William Tell Overture, the Valkyries once again appear, interrupting the Ghostbusters as they’re climbing up a ladder affixed to the side of the opera house. One of the Valkyries manage to cut through the ladder’s metal stabilizers, which results in the ladder falling backwards, with the Ghostbusters still clinging to the rungs.  Fortunately, they don’t fall to their deaths, as the top of the ladder happens to land on the edge of a building across the street.  As such, the Ghostbusters are able to use the fallen ladder like a set of monkey bars and make it safely back to the roof of the opera house.  (Well, that was convenient.)    Once they’re out of immediate danger, the Ghostbusters fire their Proton Packs at the Valkyries, but it proves to be ineffective, and the Valkyries enter into a pipe that supposedly leads down to the boiler room.  So they have to head down to the basement to head them off.  (Winston excitedly mentions that’s where the Phantom is, only to receive angry glares from Egon and Ray.)  Of course, when they make it down to the basement, they find there’s no sign of the Valkyries.  Ray states they have to be around there somewhere, as the Valkyries will not be satisfied until they carry a hero off to Valhalla.  Sure enough, when Leopold begins directing the orchestra in playing Ride of the Valkyries upstairs, the Valkyries emerge from the boiler.  Both the Valkyries and the Ghostbusters end up in the performance hall (with the Ghostbusters managing to trigger a conveniently placed elevating platform).  The Ghostbuster’s attempts at stopping the Valkyries ends up completely disrupting the rehearsal, much to Leopold’s annoyance.

That evening, as people start to arrive to attend the performance, the Ghostbusters inform Metzenbaum that they haven’t managed to stop the Valkyries.  So, for the safety of the opera patrons, it might be in everyone’s best interests to cancel the night’s performance.  However, this does not sit well with Leopold.  He states that, in his 20 years as a conductor, he has never missed a performance. And he is not willing to ruin that record.  As such, he insists that the Ghostbusters leave the opera house.  Upon being told that Diva was the one who requested their assistance, Leopold heads to her dressing room to give her an ultimatum. He tells her that either the Ghostbusters leave or he does.  With that, he storms out of the dressing room.  Once Leopold leaves the room, Diva makes a complete 180 and unceremoniously kicks Peter, who has been lounging around on her couch this whole time, out of the room.  Turns out, Diva and Leopold actually had a thing going on.  And the reason why Diva has been fawning over Peter was because she was trying to make Leopold jealous.  Well, doesn’t that make her incredibly likable?

Peter, trying to save face or something, begins running off at the mouth as Diva walks off to begin her performance, stating he knew exactly what Diva was up to from the start and that he was never actually interested in her.   After all, he’s a national hero, so he can easily get a girlfriend any time he wants.  Of course, the moment Peter claims to be a hero, the Valkyries, who were within earshot, swoop in, snatching Peter up.  

Knowing that the Valkyries will take Peter to Valhalla if they get away, the Ghostbusters move quickly to seal every possible exit within the opera house.  Of course, that leaves the question of how to get Peter away from the Valkyries.  Egon suggests opening up the skylight above the stage and setting up a Ghost Trap nearby, they can trap the Valkyries as they try to leave.  Even though it’s a risky move, as they’ll lose Peter for good if the Valkyries get past the Ghost Trap, they have very little alternative.  So Egon’s plan is executed.  And it ultimately works, though the streams from their Proton Packs ends up putting on an impressive light show that seems to improve the opera that’s being performed as they work.

With the Valkyries taken care of, and the performance saved, the Ghostbusters turn to leave the opera house, with Peter promising to never get carried away by another woman again.  But then, as they’re leaving, they see a ghost emerging from the basement. Yep, turns out the stagehand’s claim that the Phantom dwelled in the basement was completely correct.  Instinctively, the Ghostbusters get ready to fire off their Proton Packs again, but they stop when they hear the Phantom complaining that a ghost cannot get any peace and quiet anymore, and that he’s leaving the opera house for good.  And so, the Phantom floats out through the door, leaving the Ghostbusters standing there, completely bemused.

Again, I have no idea what they were doing when they wrote this episode.  Why exactly were the Valkyries appearing at the Metropolitan Opera House?  I know the episode said they appeared whenever Leopold played Ride of the Valkyries, but if that’s the case, why did they also appear for the William Tell Overture?  I don’t think that second musical piece is about Valkyries. If it was, how come Valkyries don’t appear every time those two musical scores are utilized?  After all, both those musical scores are pretty much in the public domain, and have appeared in multiple movies and TV shows.  It made me suspect that it all had something to do with Leopold himself.  Like, either the sheet music he was using or his conductor’s baton was haunted somehow. But the episode never alluded to anything like that.

Also, Egon’s fanboy crush on Diva seemed to be rather pointless. The way he was so enamored with her in the first few minutes seemed like they were going to present a whole ‘never meet your heroes’ sort of message.  And the way that Diva turned out to be the sort of person who would play around with someone’s feelings in order to try and make her boyfriend-of-sorts jealous did indicate she wasn’t a nice person. But again, that never happened.

Finally, the whole angle with the Valkyries themselves. While it is an interesting concept, I can’t shake the feeling that the episode really misrepresented them. Sure, I’m not an expert on Norse mythology, but I’m fairly certain Valkyries only take fallen heroes who have died in battle to Valhalla.  I don’t think they ever abducted people who are still alive.  Also, wouldn’t capturing the Valkyries lead to serious reproductions?  After all, Valkyries were the handmaidens of Odin, one of the major Norse gods.  If the Ghostbusters put the Valkyries in the Containment Unit, I imagine they probably risked the wrath of Odin himself. Considering how much of a challenge a god like Gozer was for the Ghostbusters, do they really want to tangle with another god?

(Click her for more Ghostbusters reviews)

[ghostbustershq]

Ghostbusters: Afterlife - Trailer A Breakdown

“Troy, wondering what you thought about that new Ghostbusters trailer?”

Well, I’ve waited thirty years for this moment. Something tells me that my long-winded and verbose writing sensibilities won’t be able to convey my thoughts in a text message or 140 characters on Twitter. Welcome anyone that I’ve pointed in this direction. I’ve been waiting an awful long time for this. And that’s not to be dismissive of the wonderful experience and entertaining film we received just three short years ago. This is something different. But the same. Something new, but also something familiar. In one word?

Wow.

Quite a bit to unpack in a trailer revealing the first details on what has otherwise been a very tight-lipped production. Needless to say, the first real look at Jason Reitman’s Ghostbusters: Afterlife blew me away. The direct sequel to Ghostbusters II looks to take some twists and turns, while incorporating the iconography and elements that made the original film and its sequel so popular in the 80’s. To be completely honest, it’s quite difficult to sit here and put into words my reaction to seeing a trailer for a movie I’ve been waiting 30 years to see. Excited doesn’t even begin to describe just how fun and exciting this trailer release has been. Not to mention just how special this film release will be.

But you’re not here for a review or my sentiments, you’re here for a breakdown to the trailer with a few comments and screen grabs.

Let’s do it, eh?

Hitting the Road

Right out of the gate, some stunning cinematography from Eric Steelberg on full-display here as a car full of teenage kids approach what appears to be an old mine elevator at the top of an incredible looking vista. Kids being kids, golden hour in full effect, it’s a lovely first introduction to the world in which this film will inhabit. Finn Wolfhard’s character Trevor answers a pointed question that his family has moved to Summerville because they’re completely broke. To the point that he’s getting a haircut at home by his own mother, Callie (played by Carrie Coon). We’re meeting a family on some hard times, forced to make a hard turn in their lives because of finances.

Grandpa’s “Creepy Old Farmhouse”

The family pulls up to a farmhouse and barn that looks like they’ve both seen better days. A giant barn with a collapsed roof and several silos surround a Gothic looking weather vein riddled house that may as well be out of the Addams Family. Dire circumstances have forced them to move to a family farm inherited from an, as of now, unknown grandfather. Phoebe (played by Mckenna Grace) gets out of the car with a look on her face that says it all. And those eyeglasses… well, we’ve all talked about who those look like they belong to at great length.

Something’s Amiss

Trevor’s tender moment with a new friend (Celeste O’Connor’s still as-of-yet-unrevealed character) is interrupted by the mine elevator they’re sitting on shakes violently and a green glow emanates from the mine below them. All is not picture-perfect Americana in Summerville as we’ve been led to believe. An entity explodes from the mine, escaping into the air and pushing the teenagers back in the process. That glimpse of our paranormal haunting kicks us into the studio and production company logos.

Bron Studios/Bron Media Logo

Interestingly, no Ghost Corps logo attached to the trailer. But there is a newcomer to both the trailer and the teaser poster released on Friday, Bron Studios. A Canadian company, Bron gets a logo right after Sony/Columbia possibly suggesting they’re a financial backer of the film or a large partner in some shape or form. A quick look at iMDB shows that Aaron L. Gilbert of Bron Media has been added as an Executive Producer to the film as well.

Earthquakes and Mr. Grooberson

Here’s our first real taste of how Paul Rudd’s character will factor into the film. He’s intrigued by Summerville’s seismic activities, given the fact that it doesn’t lie on a fault line, nor does it have any of the telltale signs of locations that should be moving and shaking. The protagonist family huddles under a table during a quake where we get a good taste of the film’s humor courtesy of Trevor with a quippy one-liner about the summer that they died under a table. So what is happening? Stay tuned. Also, admittedly I was too distracted by the beautiful lighting in the shot with Trevor to notice the symmetrical book stacking visual gag in the background until others pointed it out. Well played, set dec team. I’d expect there will be visual easter eggs like this throughout the entirety of the film.

Mystery Box Revealed

Following one of the quakes at their new home, Phoebe seemingly finds a loose floorboard and a sliding puzzle that has been left behind by their grandfather to hide the presence of a familiar ghost trap. Which Phoebe takes to school and shows off to her still unnamed friend, played by Logan Kim. The sight of a ghost trap tickles Mr. Grooberson, who connects it with the famed-Ghostbusters who saved New York City back in the 1980’s. The kids have no idea of the existence of ghosts, nor what occurred back in 1984 near Central Park. Grooberson is more than happy to educate them.

Jason Reitman Front and Center

After the ghost trap’s appearance, Jason Reitman (deservedly so) gets a card proclaiming the film coming from him as a writer-director hyphenate. The credit comes over an industrial space with a whole lot of Ridley Scott creep-factor going on. If I had one nit to pick with the trailer, it’s the producer in me that is concerned poor Jason’s credit never resolves with the “R” in Reitman not obstructed by the light blooming in the center of the frame.

A Free-Roaming… Something?

Right after Jason Reitman’s card, comes a panning shot across the same industrial space where a gelatinous blob is in the distance doing something. It’s tough to make out exactly what type of entity we’re looking at here, but it seems to appear (and move) like a microscopic organism or something found at the depths of the sea. Which I quite enjoy. A ghost that looks unlike anything we’ve ever seen before. Also worth noting that the movements feel practical - there is weight and almost a rubbery movement to it just like the creature designs from the shop in the 80’s. Love it.

New York Was Like the Walking Dead

Mr. Grooberson shows Phoebe and Logan Kim’s character archival footage from the 1980’s where he remembers seeing the ghost trap utilized as a kid. The Ghostbusters were a phenomenon 35 years ago, but have been forgotten. As history tends to move on and generations aren’t impacted by the events of their elders, they’re learning about who the Ghostbusters were. Phoebe comments that her mother has never spoken of the events that took place in New York and that their father isn’t in the picture.

Of note, these two shots are incredible angles that I don’t believe I’ve seen before. Perhaps the result of Jason Reitman and his post production team digging into the mines and finding the original dailies and negative from the 1984 film for use in Afterlife?

PKE Readings and “Does This Pole Still Work?”

Phoebe seems to have found other Ghostbusting equipment and uses it to trace readings back to a makeshift shed. Presumably a continuation of the scene based on the editing, Phoebe slides down a fire pole (!!!) to a subterranean hidden space. She continues to follow readings on the PKE Meter, finding equipment including the orange piece of machinery taken from the original Ghostbusters at Columbia University, a Betamax recorder in the far distance, an oscilloscope, and a whole lot of fungi growing in jars. The camera pans over sample dishes of spores, molds and fungus collections, (subtly cued with Phoebe talking about picking through the rubble of her grandfather’s life) and then continues past a proton pack in progress of assembly.

Admittedly, this was the first moment in the trailer where I could feel my heart doing backflips. We’re seeing the past through Phoebe’s eyes and everything looks, feels, and sounds like Ghostbusters. I love it. This movie is about discovery, as we’ve heard over and over. To me, it feels a bit like we’re (the viewer - the broader public outside of us fans) are rediscovering our love for what made these movies so popular.

The Shoe Drops

This is where any other trailer would take the opportunity to pepper in the bass drops, kick in the soft-breathy cover version of Ray Parker Jr.’s theme song, or some other overused trope. But Ghostbusters Afterlife takes a pretty bold stance and tries something different. And to me, it really works. When Mr. Grooberson discovers that the ghost trap isn’t a replica and is, in fact a real ghost trap (and may be occupied still), he questions who Phoebe is, as there’s a cut to Phoebe’s hand grazing over a rack of flight suits revealing the name tag, “Spengler” barely having enough time to resolve before a smash to black.

In what is absolutely a stroke of genius of whomever is responsible for this wonderful trailer, Bill Murray’s line for the original movie as Venkman and Stantz share a bottle of Apricot Brandy talking about going into business for themselves takes on a whole new meaning: “Call it fate, call it luck, call it karma. I believe everything happens for a reason,” is said while - - to my ear - - a new rendition of the same Elmer Bernstein cue that plays under the scene swells.

A Certified Genius or an Authentic Wacko

After a “Next Summer” sell card, another beautiful Americana (c/o Calgary) vista of the Shandor Mining Company. Interesting, perhaps Ivo Shandor from the original film fancied himself an entrepreneur at one point before he became an architect? Or perhaps this is a result of his interest in metallurgy mentioned by Stantz? Perhaps he mined his own supplies for projects? Either way, I’m starting to think that Sumeriaville… ahem… sorry… Summerville might be following in a classic trope of some of the best horror stories. A town with an incredibly horrible secret. Warning signs don’t matter to Phoebe and Logan Kim’s character as they trudge ahead.

Hello, Beautiful

Meanwhile, in the narrative of our trailer, Trevor follows in Phoebe’s footsteps into the fields of the farm and finds something of his own: a beautiful (but a little rusty) 1959 Miller-Meteor Cadillac as the ground shakes again, something shatters through a row of school buses seemingly attacking Phoebe, and the town goes into high-alert. Amid the chaos, there’s a striking 20 frames or so of Phoebe staring into a horrifying fire pit of arms - lost souls? Something else? And immediately after that, Mr. Grooberson frantically tries to escape from a snarling beast that slams a foot on the hood of his automobile. Trevor’s Ecto-1 adventure continues as he turns the key and an homage that would make Laszlo Kovacs proud reveals the familiar license plate and front grill emerging from the garage and into the field for a joy ride. The ol’ Ecto has a whole lotta horsepower left in the tank.

Damn Right, This Thing Has a Gunner’s Seat

And that’s when the trailer hits us. What can and should be the most amazing surprise in the trailer (if not unfortunately spoiled for you by a few self-interested rotten apples with horrible cell phone photos) - this isn’t the Ecto we’re familiar with. Perhaps an explanation as to why it’s the ol’ Ecto-1, or maybe the car was always being changed throughout the duration of the Ghostbusters’ longevity, THIS Ectomobile looks to have been heavily modified for field work. Phoebe, with a thrower in her hand, swivels out into an attack position and we’re off to the races. The Ecto-1, with Phoebe in the gunner position, looks to be chasing the microscopic entity seen earlier in the industrial space - though some people have speculated that might be Slimer, I don’t think that’s the case. Either way… Dear Hasbro, take my money now. My goodness, what an awesome set-piece (and toyetic moment) that looks like it will be.

Everything about this movie speaks to me. It’s playing with my nostalgia. It’s also giving us something new and the promise of the next generation discovering the Ghostbusters both on-screen and off. The fact that a main character is named Trevor for some reason immediately made me think of my amazing former boss and now guide to the next generation of comedy Trevor Albert, who was a long-time friend and colleague of Harold Ramis. Phoebe’s an intriguing character and the friendship that we saw Mckenna Grace and Logan Kim develop via social media throughout the course of the production seems to have carried over to their on-screen performances.

Of course, noticeably absent are any of the original cast members. But, as the theme of this trailer and seemingly the movie as a whole is discovery and things slowly unfolding, I can imagine that moment will be saved until the absolute very end of the marketing campaign. If the cast isn’t kept in secret similar to Mark Hamill in The Force Awakens completely. To be completely honest, I don’t want to see another frame until opening day of the film itself. And if this is the only trailer they release, that would be a wonderful mystery box. Particularly for this Ghostbusters podcast host who would have to break another TV spot or trailer down frame by frame. I get the sense that the less we know and see about this movie before the first viewing experience, the better.

But most of all - - the iconography, the designs from Stephen Dane, Michael C. Gross, and so many other artists has carried over successfully and looks authentic. This is no replica, as the trailer blatantly tells us. This is the real deal.

[msgtporkins]

Dealing With The Elephant’s Foot

I sit at my computer, writing this as sweat pours down brow and the back of my neck due to the medication that is helping me fight this bacterial demon of epic proportions. The scare first started on Saturday night after I had a late workout session. It was light duty stuff to help bring my corpulent frame in something more manageable then get back into the brawny young man I was in high school. The thought of once more being able to see my penis excited me as I walked 3 miles on the treadmill then proceeded with some light free weights then the bane of any fat guy's routine - the sit up.  I cranked out 20 (the most I could do without pushing myself) and felt good about doing so. I'd been doing the same routine nightly for two weeks and dropped an impressive 3 pounds. That may not seem like much but to me, it was a clear goal. 

  As I head home for a much needed shower and sleep, I awoke the next morning to go to church to help out in the kitchen on the first of the month but my right calf had a slight burning sensation as if someone was pulling a frat house prank on a drunk guy by holding a match under bare skin. I stretched it out and thought nothing of it until I got home. While sitting down in my office chair to do some quality video recording, I felt a weird lump in the crease between my thigh and groin area. At first I thought it some sort of fatty mass because when you're as big as me, you tend to have areas like that but something was off. It was a hard mass and it was in the lymph node area, thinking that during the cold season it may have clogged up and sometimes they will do that. During the summer time, the ones in my throat will do so due to allergies so I shrugged it off...until a few hours later.  The mass grew double its size and I began to worry.  I showed my wife and we got onto Skype with her father, who has been a male ER nurse for 40 plus years. He has seen things that Indiana Jones would dare to discover and it was only proper to ask his advice. After some cross-chat and prognosis, we figured it to be DVT (Deep Vein Thrombosis) or lymph nodes swelling.  CaffienatedTigress, my wife, went down to the store and picked up some low-dose aspirin to help thin the blood some to see if that would help.  It did but not in the way we thought it would.

  I woke up the next morning to a mass that had spread to my genital area, causing a slight painful swelling that was looking to overtake everything down south. I wasn't panicked or anything but I figured it was more lymph node thing until I moved. The burning sensation came back full force and it felt as if you had slept too close to a campfire and your sin was all painfully burning because you were slightly cooked. Over the next couple of days, the swelling had gotten worse and my right testicle was about the size of a grapefruit and had the appearance of Quasimodo and Sloth made a baby during some animalistic argument sex. Now it was time to go see a doctor. We made our way to a Primary Health Non-Emergency clinic a.k.a. Doc-In-A-Box and awaited to be seen. Apparently, the doc was let out of his cage that day and only a Physician's Assistant was available. They asked if that would be okay. I said of course but in turned out not to be. A young man who reminded me of Paul Reubens yet looked perfectly suited for a prison ward looked me over. He was oddly reluctant at the fact that I was not timid about becoming naked in the time it takes for Rosie O'Donnell to demolish a honey ham during the holidays. After a quick look over, he announced that I could have a hernia. Great. I spend all this time trying to be careful and taking it easy, only to be side-tracked by the one thing I didn't want. He referred us to an actual hospital where actual doctors could do actual examination with actual accuracy. Once again, we were off like my boxers. 

  We arrived at St. Luke's where we were wonderfully greeted by a mousy, young gal that reminded of Jennine Melnatz, the receptionist from the movie, "Ghostbusters". That's a good thing because we saw lots of her as she apologized profusely throughout of visit because Pee Wee forgot to send over the paperwork and when he finally did (I can assume we were waiting for Mailman Mike or Captain Carl to deliver it from Puppet Land), it was a jumbled mess of letters, sentences and paragraphs that was even worse than what you are reading right now. After a couple of hours of sorting through it all, we were brought back to the ultrasound room to see if the mass that was growing like The Blob was indeed a hernia. While Tigress watched from a mere six feet away, my groin region was fondled by a mid-30's blonde gal whose touch were like silk for over an hour and afterwards she even gave her coffee. My penis did nothing the entire time, not even poking out of its now flesh bunker like the gopher from Caddyshack. It was stoic and unwavering like a mighty oak...er...acorn. As she was sending over the result, apparently, the computer was having a hard time trying to send over the information of my newly-lubed genitals to the radiologist to view. She had to take a screen shot with her phone to send enough over to him and ended us sending me home because it wasn't an emergency from what they could find. They told me they would call the next day and I would hear the bad/good news. 

17 hours later... 

  I get a call from Pee Wee because I can safety assume that he had gotten a new tin can for his phone after Cowboy Curtis shot the old one. He told me that there was 'dead and dying tissue so I needed to go to the ER'. Well shit... We loaded up into the Tigress-mobile and headed off to the place I should of went to first. This was another St. Luke's but the one I knew better. I was born in this one. Everyone in the Pork Platoon helped raised money for the Children's Hospital there. I should of used better judgement and went right to where I knew that I would of had this problem solved without the sketchy medical practices of Puppet Land and faulty ultrasound machines. (I would of missed out on a good fondling so it wasn't all bad) I was immediately brought in, stripped down and put into a room within five minutes of arrival. So far, so good then walks in the hero of the story. The male ER nurse that came to save the day had a battle-harden look about him. He had the physical attributes of Mr. Clean and the cut-straight-through-the-bullshit feel of Cable from the Marvel comic. In the next two minutes, he man-handled my junk as if he was engaged in hand-to-gland combat. He knew exactly where to strike and get the job done. He asked if there was an ultrasound and I told him, "Yes, sir.". Within a minute's time, he disappeared and came back, having gotten the results from the other hospital and told me that I had a bacterial infection most commonly found on gym equipment. He had saved the day in record time and ravished my body in a way I have never been loved before. 

  Rewind back to that Saturday night. 

  The on-site gym in the apartment complex I live it isn't exactly the best in the world but it does what you need it to do. There are free-weights, treadmills, stationary bikes and some sort of machine that even in all my years of workout, I've never seen before and probably equate it to some sort of Slavic torture device that was used by Spetsnaz for interrogating Western spies and now was bought on the cheap by this housing company because 'it looks like gym equipment'. There is only one bench in the entire place that has the ability to be able to use it for sit ups and free weights. The one I used quite often, every day in fact. I'm the kind of person that cleans up equipment afterwards because I wouldn't want anyone sliding around on my body sweat because Tigress does that and I even feel bad for her for doing that. That gal is the greatest wife in the world. Apparently, I was naive to think others would do the same but in this hustle-and-bustle world of staying glued to an iPhone and not giving a damn about where you sling your body fluids, I can only imagine the genital sweat left behind by all the men and women living there. One can only guess by what slimy smegma-covered hot dog or Sarlaac pit mixed with the bacterial contents of a Chipotle food service line have laid across this bench and not been wiped up once. I was the one who fell victim to such vile nastiness and my groin nearly paid the ultimate price. 

  The antibiotics are working great yet they are causing me to sweat because my body is warming itself up to fight off the foreign invaders.  It's just natural and happens normally but since I'm a naturally warm-bodied person, the kind of heat I produce is liken to that of the 1986 Chernobyl disaster and I'm laying on top of the covers while my still swollen testicle sits their like the infamous Elephant's Foot, only can be viewed by someone for a few seconds because keeling over and dying. At least I'm feeling better. 

I'll see you all on the next battlefield! 

Deuces, 

Wayde "MSgtPorkins" Andazola

[smokeybrand]

Smokey brand Retrospective: Red Pill Me

Cinemacon has passed and there has been a lot of awesome sh*t revealed. On the top of that list, obviously, Spider-Man: Far From Home has me geeked to high heaven but there were a ton of other noteworthy reveals. There was some Batman reveals, a few Mission Impossible 7 and Top Gun 2 trailers, plus audiences ever got a surprise screening of Ghostbusters: Afterlife. Now, that would be great on it's own but cats even got a little sizzle real for Matrix Resurrections: The long gestating fourth Matrix film. Apparently, this thing is releasing in December. I am lukewarm at best. I have fond memories of the Matrix trilogy as a whole but, since it’s final release some twenty years ago, the Wachowskis have been revealed to be one trick ponies. They kind of suck at film making. I mean, i liked Speed Racer but i just generally enjoy Speed Racer. It helped tremendously that Christina Ricci was Trixie, too, but everything after that was kind of balls. I also really like V for Vendetta but that’s not real their movie, they just adapted it. I guess you can say that about Speed Racer, too. Anyway, in light of there near Shyamalan-esque track record with their films, i wanted to revisit the first three Matrix films and see if they hold up, to try and muster some sense of excitement for what comes next.

The Matrix

Of the trilogy, this is easily the best film. Everything about it is exceptional. The Matrix was a whole ass shift in the cultural zeitgeist. It was a lot of people’s first experience with accessible cyberpunk and I'll always love it for that. I’ll also love it for normalizing Hong Kong style action sequences and giving us the most breathtaking application of Bullet Time I've seen to date. The Matrix s why the theater exists. If you’ve never seen this thing on the big screen, you missed out on something very special. I had just just turned thirteen when it released and checked it out at the dollar theater. I had only ever seen anything like this, in anime. Seeing all of my favorite Eighties OVAs filtered through the big budget Hollywood lens was incredible. I even like the rather pedestrian narrative. I think the story worked for what the movie was trying to do. It’s a shame the Wachowskis have tried to rewrite history about the narrative as of late. I understand the underlying themes of identity and sexuality but come on? That’s some college film theory bullsh*t that got tacked on after the fact. Now, if the original script is to be believed, then, yes, all of that, but what we got is not so profound. This is a basic Chosen One narrative with Dope ass effects that were ahead of it’s time.

A fr as the cast, what can i say? These motherf*ckers were perfect. Keanu Reeves as Neo was inspired. It’s wild to say that because dude is a plank but it works. He’s the POV character, he’s who you see that world through. Making him a blank slate so to speak, helps with immersion and that is a world you definitely wan to be immersed within. This was my first experience with Carrie-Ann Moss and I've loved her ever since. Her Trinity fast became one of my favorite characters and I'm actually pretty excited to see where she is in the new film. Lawrence Fishburne as Morpheus was an interesting choice. I wasn’t mad and it worked perfectly but it was weird seeing him in such an active, action oriented, role. That said, for me, this movie is made by Hugo Weaving. He is absolutely monstrous as Agent Smith. He’s got this scene chewing energy that mirrors Christoph Waltz’s Hans Landa and we all know how much i love that Nazi f*ck so that’s really high praise. To this day, I've got his Humanity is a Virus speech memorized. It was just that f*cking good! The Matrix is an exquisite watch and it is absolutely mandatory viewing if you consider yourself a fan of cinema.

The Matrix Reloaded

Whoo, boy, talk about a drop in quality. Reloaded released four years later in 2003 and it screams Studio Mandate. I was a sprightly eighteen years old when this thing dropped and made it a point to see it opening day. I really enjoyed the first outing so i figured this one would be just as amazing. Indeed, i remember leaving the theater thinking to myself how decent of a sequel it turned out to be. It wasn’t better than the first but it didn’t sh*t the bed like most follow-ups do. Fast forward to present day and, after watching this thing again for the first time in probably fifteen years, it’s kind of f*cking bad. Like, as a cinematic experience, it’s pretty tight Everything is amped up. Tons more action, way more bombastic set pieces, stakes have been raised considerably; The Matrix Reloaded is everything you want in a summer blockbuster sequel. However, that’s it. Everything else is worse. The acting has become way too hammy and the new cast members fit into this narrative like a square peg in a round hole. Why is f*cking Niobe even in this thing? Who even is the Merovingian? Why is Mouse? The pacing is all over the place, too. Like, this thing stops dead in it’s tracks on several occasions but that’s not the worst of it.

The worst thing is the narrative. What the f*ck even is the story trying to be told in this movie? It doesn’t make any f*cking sense. The Matrix was, very obviously, a standalone film. That was a closed narrative. Neo’s story had been told. Everything after that is unnecessary. This movie is an exercise in the unnecessary. I appreciate all of how unchained and manic Smith is in this but, outside of that, what the f*ck was the point of this whole narrative? It’s filler. This movie is filler and it feels like it. The returning cast is serviceable and seeing Zion was interesting. I like how all the survivors are just sweaty black people. I literally hated everyone added to the cast though. Well, that’s not quite true. I rather enjoyed Collin Chou as Seraph. Dude was inconsequential but i love seeing Asian martial artists not name Li or Chan getting some shine. Also, Monica Bellucci is in this and i kind of just love her in general. Her Persephone is absolutely disposable but she looks damn fine in that plastic wrapped dress of hers. I literally can’t be bothered mentioning anyone else. They are that forgettable. This movie is that forgettable. And it’s arguably the best of the two sequels.

The Matrix Revolutions

Talk about going out with a thud. Man, i saw this with my best friend, rest in peace B, and we both hated it. He was an even bigger fan of The Matrix than i was so his disappointment was palpable. I’ll never forget his visceral reaction when that rainbow spread across the super happy Hollywood ending. Dude was hot and he had every right to be. The first Matrix set up this intriguing, immersive, world full of fanatic visuals, great piratical stunts, and a very through provoking premise. The second Matrix was your basic Hollywood sequel; More shine, less substance. But Revolutions? Man this is peak Wachowski fail. You saw hints of this messiah sh*t in the first, it’s literally a Chosen One narrative, but thy went all in on that sh*t in Reloaded. By the time Revolutions finished, this whole narrative was so far up it’s own ass, it didn’t know which way was up. It just f*cking ends. Everyone is dead and it’s over. The Wachowskis went heavy on the Jesus imagery, they were not subtle, and the f*cking conflict just ends. Robot don’t stop using people as batteries. Flesh and blood Humans still have to live in Zion. The only thing that’s changed is Neo’s dead and Agent Smith has been deleted. That’s it. The Matrix still exists, people are still trapped in it, and everything that happened in these films doesn’t f*cking matter. Literally right back at the start of the whole goddamn conflict. Revolutions is so f*cking disappointing, dude, by every measure of that metric.

Hugh Weaving is still pretty good as Smith and Keanu does his best imitation of white bread as Neo but, like, everything else is just so pedestrian. Plus, this thing is long. Like, unreasonably so. Why the f*ck is this movie two hours? The entire trilogy is kind of like that but it’s most egregious in this one. This story could be told in ninety minutes, just like Reloaded. Why the f*ck do i have an extra half hour of bullsh*t in this? Like, that whole “Neo Lost” arc was unnecessary, in both sequels. F*cking why? I don’t hate Revolutions. It’s not a “bad” film per say, it’s just disappointing. It’s the poster child for the law of diminishing returns. The Matrix Revolutions is the what happens when you let creatives with fresh egos, run amok with one hundred and fifty million f*cking dollars. So much spectacle but even less substance that Reloaded and that motherf*cker was a hollow mess. Still, The Matrix Revolutions is better than anything Michael Bay or Zack Snyder has ever made so i guess it’s got that going for it.

[dadkingsteve-blog]

Back to the Future

“Holy shit, that was the best goddamn movie I’ve ever seen in my life.”

Dustin burst through the doors of The Hawk movie theater, his excitement preceding him.

“Hey man,” Steve lowered his voice, “what’d we say about language in public? There’s little kids here. Littler than you.” Steve walked closely behind Dustin, followed by an equally-ecstatic Lucas, Max, Will, Mike, and El. 

“You know what, Steve. I’m not sorry. Back to the Future is hands-down, one hundred percent, absolutely the best goddamn movie I’ve ever seen.”

“You said that about Ghostbusters last year,” Lucas retorted, now leading the group as they started down the street. 

“Are you saying you didn’t like Back to the Future? Is that what you’re saying right now? Lucas, is that what you-”

“No, that is not what I’m saying. I’m saying that when we went to see Ghostbusters last year, and as we left this very movie theater, you said ‘Holy shit, that was the best goddamn movie I’ve ever seen in my life.”

“Language!” Steve interjected, wearing a small grin.

Ignoring Steve, Lucas went on, “It’s just the facts!”

“How do you know that’s exactly what I said, Lucas? Did you have a tape recorder, huh?”

“I did not. But it’s wha-”

“Alright, alright. Enough, guys!” Max shouted playfully, “You two argue like an old married couple.” Max threw the board under her arm down on the ground and skated leisurely ahead of the rest.

Mike, El, and Will strolled behind the others, smiling in quiet amusement at their bickering friends. 

The sun was setting on another July evening in downtown Hawkins, casting the peaceful streets in a warm orange glow. El relished in the feeling of sunshine on her face, the light breeze that played through her hair, Mike’s hand in her own. 

She had gone too long without all of these lovely, simple things. 

El had begged Hopper for weeks to let her see Back to the Future with her friends. “It’s not safe yet,” he would say. “A few more months,” he would explain, "You already got the Snow Ball.” Every day she would ask, and every day he would say no.

But finally, Hopper broke down. Maybe El had just beaten him down enough with her incessant pleas, or maybe it was because, ultimately, all he wanted was for her to be happy. All he really wanted was for her to have a normal life,  be a normal teenager. And so he had one simple condition: “Just no using your powers, okay?”

El took no issue with Hopper’s request. Why would she need to use her powers on a day like this? 

_______________

As El walked, she took in all of the casual wonders of life outside of her little cabin. Windows lined with bright flower boxes, the way the sunlight made the cars glisten, the smell of buttery popcorn wafting from the theater. As she savored her surroundings, she noticed something peculiar amongst it all. Something disruptive. Across the street was a group of six or so older teenagers, gathered around a parked car in an otherwise empty lot. They spoke loudly and blared music from a radio, while clouds of smoke plumed around them.

“Mike, what are they doing?” El asked quietly. 

Mike turned to examine the rowdy group. Something about them looked familiar, but he couldn’t place it. “I don’t know. Hanging out I guess.” He paused and thought for a moment before asking, “Steve, do you know those idiots?” 

The grin faded quickly from Steve’s face as he looked towards the commotion. Steve did know those idiots. They were Tommy and Carol and all of his other ex-friends. Doing things he used to do. 

Steve hesitated, “N-no. No, I don’t know them. Just some assholes. Assholes I don’t know,” Steve averted his gaze, lowering his head as he increased his speed. “Let’s go home, guys. It’s getting late.”

“Aw, Steve, you said we’d get ice cream,” Will spoke, his tone reflecting his disappointment.

“Yeah, El hasn’t had any ice cream yet this summer!” Mike added. 

Steve fumbled with his words, “D-Dustin you’ve got ice cream at your house, right? We can go there. Let’s just...Let’s just get outta here.” He hurried ahead, walking quickly now in the direction of his car.

El noticed Tommy and Carol walking towards the group, smirking menacingly. “I think Steve does know those assholes,” she muttered.

It was too late for Steve to try to escape. Tommy and Carol had spotted him. “Well, well, well, if it isn’t the Babysitter’s Club?” Tommy mocked.

“Are these your friends now, Stevie?” Carol chirped.

Steve ignored them, grumbling a small “Come on guys, let’s go,” to the group. 

“Excuse you, my girlfriend asked a question. She wanted to know if these little nerds are your friends now.” Tommy’s tone was even more vicious than before. 

“S-Steve who are these peop-” Will stammered.

“Let’s just go, I-I’ll explain later.” Steve tried without success to move the kids ahead.

“Explain what, Harrington? That you’re a loser who hangs out with second graders now?” Tommy pushed Steve’s back teasingly.

“Hey, for your information, we’re teenagers, okay?” Dustin stopped and turned towards Tommy and Carol. The others stopped too, no longer able to ignore the pair.

“Yeah, most of us are fourteen now!” Lucas added.

“We’re gonna be Freshmen this year, so you better back off.” Max stepped toward them, her skateboard held up to her body like a shield. 

Tommy’s eyes narrowed. “Shut up, nerds, nobody asked you,” he spat viciously. 

“Hey!” Steve stepped forward, his posture tensed. He pointed a finger threateningly at Tommy, his voice lowering, “Don’t you dare speak to them like that, you hear me?”

“Or else what, Harrington? You gonna bludgeon me to death with your diaper bag?” Tommy laughed and shuffled toward Steve. Carol stood close behind him, grinning wildly between loud pops of her bubble gum. 

Behind the rest stood El, her fists balled partly in rage and partly in frustration, her gaze turned down slightly. Hopper’s words circled through her head: Just no using your powers, okay? Suddenly, his simple request became a challenge to obey. 

Steve stepped even closer to Tommy, “I said. Stop.” 

“What are you gonna do, Harrington?”

Behind Steve, the group stood frozen. The threat of an imminent fight loomed, the peace of a perfect afternoon ruined. Steve turned towards the kids quickly, “You guys get out of here. I’ll handle this.” 

Taking only a small step backwards, the group exchanged silent, knowing glances with each other. No, they wouldn’t be going anywhere. 

Steve rolled up his sleeves and raised his fists slowly, while Tommy placed his right foot back and lifted his arms. They paused, poised like this for more than a moment, waiting for the other to throw the first punch. El’s fists balled tighter as Hopper’s words raced through her mind. Steve’s driving heartbeat pounded in his ears. All was quiet except the now-eerie, distant sound of music playing from the lot across the street. 

That, and a sudden, roaring battle cry from Dustin. 

Dustin lurched forward from the group towards Tommy. Using all the force he could muster, he slammed his body into Tommy’s, attempting to push him away from Steve. After a brief moment, Max, Mike, and Lucas joined in the effort, followed by a hesitant but ultimately ungrudging Will and Eleven.  

Exclamations of “Step off, douchebag!” and “Son-of-a-bitch!” and “You don’t mess with us!” were heard from an otherwise indistinguishable cacophony of yells and curses. 

“Guys! Guys! Stop it!” Steve shouted as he tried, but ultimately failed, to pull the kids away. 

“What the hell!” Carol shrieked as she watched from the side. 

Tommy writhed and grunted, attempting to push the kids away. Eventually, after much effort, he was able to pull himself out. He side-stepped and shuffled away, wearing an expression of confusion. 

“Bunch of freaks,” Tommy muttered, glancing backward at the group briefly before jogging down the street, Carol close behind him. 

“Now you can go back to your friends and tell them you got beat up by a bunch of second graders!” Max yelled in the direction of Tommy. Her words were echoed by a round of shouts in agreement from the group, who watched as Tommy and Carol retreated. 

When the couple was out of sight, Steve turned to the kids. “What the hell was that?” 

“You clearly didn’t want to kick his ass. So we did it for you.” Dustin shrugged his shoulders as he spoke matter-of-factly. The others nodded slowly, agreeing to Dustin’s account. 

“I-I, told you guys to let me handle it.” 

Lucas gave a friendly pat on Steve’s back as he began to walk down the street again as if nothing had just happened, “It’s alright, Steve. We won’t tell anyone that you need a bunch of kids to protect you.” The others giggled and joined Lucas. 

As the group walked ahead, Steve stayed still for a moment, shaking his head in disbelief. Protect me? Protect me? Psh, I don’t need them to protect me. I can protect myself. I just didn’t want to throw the first pun-

“Steve! Can we get ice cream now?” Mike shouted from halfway down the block, interrupting Steve’s internal dialogue. 

No, he didn’t need them to protect him. Or at least that’s what he told himself. But it was good to have a group who always had his back. And, whether he could admit it to himself or not, that was something Steve’s never really had before. 

Steve resigned any effort to argue this further. He relaxed his shoulders with a sigh and smiled, “Alright, alright. We’ll get ice cream.”

[jeonbase]

andrea! what are your favorite chaptered/series sugakookie fanfics??

there is a lot:

☆ = contains explicit sexual content 

(chaptered / completed) breathless by bluemixtape ☆

The distance between Prince Yoongi and his only comfort Jungkook is more than earth and sky: the weight of the crown, the unspoken apology, the endless regret. When the fate forces them back together again, all version of universes are jumbled in messy emotions and lingering memories. Min Yoongi, carrying a heart that never rests, desperately trying to reach his air: a splendid soul with thousand years worth of pain, Jeon Jungkook.

(canon verse, reincarnation, angst, hurt/comfort, prince!yoongi, servant!jeongguk, explicit sexual content, top!yoongi, bottom!jeongguk, implied prostitution, cross-dressing)

[i loved this fic so much, ah im a sucker for reincarnation AUs]

(series / ongoing) run this town by dreamingdaegu ☆

“Wanna give you a private dance,” Jungkook murmurs, tugging him in the direction of one of the secluded rooms. 

“Doesn’t that cost a lot more?” 

“You can afford it,” Jungkook tells him. 

It’s true, Yoongi can. But it’s the principle; the feeling of being taken for a fool, who’ll pay anything just because he can. He’s about to argue his point before Jungkook adds- 

“Anyway, this one’s for free.” 

[alternatively: Yoonkook fuck in a strip club] 

(AU, stripper!jeongguk, businessman!yoongi, fluff, light angst, explicit sexual content, top!yoongi, bottom!jeongguk, side taehyung/jimin, side namjoon/seokjin)

[um i talk about this series a lot, honestly one of my fav series and one of my fav characterizations] 

(chaptered / completed) how to omega by yeoubi

“Can’t we just change it?” Jimin asked. They were huddled around their manager’s laptop looking at Jungkook’s public profile. Underneath his birth date was his wolf status, Alpha, in glowing red. “Then the company will end up looking like a liar,” their manager moaned piteously. 

(Or, the one where Jungkook wasn’t as alpha as everyone expected him to be.) 

(canon verse, abo au, werewolf au, no smut, alpha!yoongi, omega!jeongguk)

(series / completed) christmas special by xiajin

yoongi was pretty sure that this was the moment he knew he was in love. 

(AU, baker!jeongguk, songwriter!yoongi, fluff, mentions of minor character death, side namjoon/seokjin, side hoseok/jimin)

[a classic, can never get tired of this]

(series / completed) peaches and cream by serindipia (meloncomia) ☆

Yoongi knows Jungkook is trouble since the first time they met, all soft colors and candy flavor. He also knows he shouldn’t be feeling this way about someone almost six years younger than him, that he’s supposed to be the responsible one; the adult. Jungkook, however, knows Yoongi has never been able to say ‘no’ to his pretty eyes and strawberry flavored lips.

(Or: Modern AU in wich Yoongi has the hots for Pastel!Jungkook, and Jungkook just wants to be babied and spoiled 24/7)

(AU, college student!yoongi, pastel!jeongguk, fluff, light angst, explicit sexual content, top!yoongi, bottom!jeongguk, daddy kink, hyung kink, age difference)

(series / uncompleted) once upon a time by theorgasmicseke

A strictly Yoongi/Jungkook series following some well known fairy tales. 

(AU, angst with a happy ending, mild blood, light angst, fluff, mention of murder)

(chaptered / completed) i know i’ll fall in love with you, baby by witheredleaf (micooled)

The soulmate/soulbond au where Yoongi is part of a famous rap duo and Jungkook is his diligent fanboy, they meet at a fansign and things escalate from there (alt. Yoongi didn’t sign up for this)

 (AU, soulmates, fanboy!jeongguk, rapper!yoongi, fluff, angst)

[one of my fav soulmate au fics, also fanboy!jeongguk wow a concept]

(ongoing / chaptered) color me blue by xiajin

yoongi wonders exactly what in the world went through his head when he decided that he wanted kids. like, what. what. 

(AU, domestic au)

(chaptered / uncompleted) riding the wavelength by siderum

“i was asking jungkookie about how yoongi hyung and he could read each other’s minds, and yoongi hyung was completely out of earshot, but when i said, ‘is it dark in there?’ hyung told me to shut up from the other side of the room. he wasn’t even looking up from his phone” - park jimin 

alt. title: hey girl do you want to make a fragile human connection in the vast and unfeeling infinity of a chaotic universe 

(canon verse, telepathy, mental link, ambiguous relationships, light angst)

(chaptered / completed) the sound of winter by officialmaknae ☆

Yoongi has a lot on his plate, but when his pack discovers a small pup in their territory, he finds that he’s about to have a lot more. 

(AU, abo au, werewolf au, pack dynamics, slow burn, heat, explicit sexual content, alpha!yoongi, omega!jeongguk, minor character death, underage drinking, blood and gore, violence, mentions of rape/non-con, dubious consent)

(chaptered / completed) telescoping series by siderum

five eyewitness accounts of the interaction between min yoongi and jeon jungkook. – 

(blossoms and cherry-sweet affection as seen through the eyes of bts members) 

(canon verse, ambiguous relationships)

(chaptered / completed) one song glory by wortmalerei

When Yoongi gets a drunken call from Jimin’s friend Jeongguk in the middle of the night, he’s ready to blow him off and go back to sleep. He never expected to end up doling out life advice and driving the kid home across half of Seoul. 

(AU, slow burn)

(chaptered / ongoing) semantics by bellamees

semantics is the study of meaning; it focuses on the relationship between words, phrases, signs, and symbols and what they stand for. 

(canon verse, fluff, light angst)

(chaptered / completed) a fever you can’t sweat out by wicked_lovely ☆

Jungkook doesn’t know what he wants. All he knows is that Yoongi’s responses to his bratty behaviour makes his blood run hot like it’s on fire. His feelings run deeper than just lust, but he doesn’t know how to make his bandmate look at him in any other way. So he continues his childish assault, slowly chipping away at Yoongi’s cool exterior, waiting for the tension to break.

(canon verse, top!yoongi, bottom!jeongguk, jeongguk is a brat, explicit sexual content, spanking, rough sex, humiliation, dom/sub undertones, light bondage)

[another classic]

(chaptered/ ongoing) do it like me by xiajin

min yoongi the cop… gets feelings for local housekeeper aka neighbor who’s cute af (or: a darker heart to heart au/spin off.) 

(AU, cop!yoongi, housekeeper!jeongguk, fluff, side hoseok/jimin, side namjoon/seokjin, social anxiety, obsessive compulsive disorder, ptsd, implied/referenced incest, child abuse)

(chaptered / completed) sun child by xiajin

so jungkook lives like this. curiosity may take him from time to time, but it always disappears with something new to do. he doesn’t mind his existence in the tower, nor does he question why he’s always left inside there, nor does he wish to leave. there’s maybe, only like, one time he wants to leave. jungkook never asks, because he knows his mother will say no; yet still he keeps it in mind, records the dates for that day to come, and paints where his mother won’t see. other than that, jungkook is fine. he is. 

(AU, tangled au, temporary charactered death, implied/referenced child abuse, (not with yk; emotional manipulation, stockholm syndrome, unhealthy relationships)

(chaptered / ongoing) fall down lightly by darling

“…we always had a thing or two between the way we are, so wake up wake up wake up; won’t you fall down lightly, lightly?” - vhsorbeta 

(AU, vampire!yoongi, past child abuse, some violence, magic torture, side namjoon/seokjin)

[i love vampire yoons]

(chaptered / uncompleted) impulse to talk by numajiri

“you weren’t kidding,” yoongi repeats, slower this time. “your roommate actually blew up your fucking apartment.” 

(AU, magic au, roommates, photographer!yoongi)

(chaptered / completed) witches petals by pursuit

“is there anything i can help you with?” 

(or: yoongi has an affinity for cute (witch) florists) 

(AU, fluff, witchflortist!jeongguk)

(chaptered / completed) a song for the demon by bluemixtape

Between colorful dust and tinkling laugh in the world of fairy, there’s few black wings hidden; those who are tainted by demon blood. That kind lives in a constant war against themselves and Yoongi, being one of them, is not an exception. As the one who has to carry the endless darkness, Yoongi can recognize even the smallest light. So when the blinding light called Jungkook comes, Yoongi has no chance against him. 

(AU, fairy au, abo au, semi-dystopia au, angst, hurt/comfort, alpha!yoongi, omega!jeongguk, half demon!yoongi, half angel!jeongguk, minor character death, mpreg, onesided jimin/jeongguk, side namjoon/seokjin)

(chaptered / completed) the garden of eden by xiajin

the truth of it all is that yoongi is inexplicably lonely.

(AU, florist!jeongguk, music teacher!yoongi, fluff)

[i think this was one of the first fics i’ve read, along with the christmas special. holds a special place in my heart, and florist!jeongguk!!!]

(chaptered / completed) unfinished by fruitily

“what am i supposed to do about this,” yoongi said blankly, “call the ghostbusters?”

“you don’t have to do anything,” jungkook said, “except maybe stop walking the bedroom-bathroom distance naked, because i’m like, seeing everything, y’know, and i just told you we should take it slow, right?” –

in which it takes yoongi a month to realize his place is haunted, jungkook is bad at being a ghost, and namjoon and jimin are probably the only contacts in yoongi’s phone. 

(AU, ghost au, ghost!jeongguk, angst, domestic fluff, mentions of death, side namjoon/seokjin, implied/past taehyung/jimin)

[i also rlly love ghost AUs]

(chaptered / completed) contractual by baekhyun (baruna) ☆

“I,” Yoongi says, “would rather die than act in another movie with Jeon Jeongguk.” “Then die.” Jimin says flatly. “Because you’re doing it anyway.”

 (AU, actors au, angst, explicit sexual content, top!yoongi, bottom!jeongguk)

(chaptered / ongoing) tea house special by baekhyun (baruna)

Earthbending prodigy Jungkook lives a relatively peaceful life in Ba Sing Se. That is, until a mysterious, wealthy stranger begins frequenting his and Seokjin’s tea house. (Or, the atla!AU where Jungkook tries desperately to figure out just who this guy is and in the process gets himself a boyfriend.) 

(AU, avatar & benders au, fluff, angst, figerbender!yoongi, earthbender!jeongguk, slightly sugar daddy yoongi, implied/referenced character death, explicit sexual content, blood, violence)

(chaptered / completed) dark cartography by diamondust ☆

sunset is bleeding into the sky in a thousand shades of red and yellow when min yoongi pushes jeon jungkook against the door to his room in the shittiest inn in the city, pistol firmly pressed against his lower back. jungkook doesn’t struggle — just screws his eyes shut and tries to hold in his breath as if he’s been waiting for that, been counting the days before someone finally put a bullet through him. yoongi is interested. 

(AU, enemies to lovers, explicit sexual content, top!yoongi, bottom!jeongguk, choking, praise kink, side hoseok/taehyung)

(chaptered / completed) one sheep, two sheep by gbyesummer (shouldshy)

Jungkook has recently moved to Seoul for school and lives with his brother and his brother’s best friends. It’s all great, if you don’t count the insomnia. (5 times Yoongi helped Jungkook fall asleep + one time Jungkook helped him.)

 (AU, roommates, fluff, pre-relationship)

[secretradiobrooklyn]

HALLOWEEN RADIO | 10.31.20

Secret Radio | Halloween special 10.31.20 | Hear it here.

Artwork by Paige, Liner notes by Evan except * means Paige

1. Sam the Sham - “Little Red Riding Hood” *

I had to make the case to Evan that this was a Halloween song, but I justify with the fact that 1.) this song uses the phrase “spooky ol’ woods” and 2.) many years ago, Sleepy Kitty played a festival on Cherokee Street that wasn’t a Halloween show but it happened to be the Saturday before Halloween. Recognizing our responsibility, we scrambled to throw together costumes and realized that if we just got a wolf mask and paws we already  had everything in our wardrobes to throw together the Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs LP cover drawing of Red and the wolf. Evan says he doesn’t like Halloween but it’s only because once he commits, he commits completely. One of my favorite moments of the night was spotting Evan that night, several hours after our set in the afternoon, having a completely serious and sincere conversation with a friend – wolf nose and paws still intact. This was pre iPhone days, but I tracked down an image and I’m gonna put it on our fake radio insta. Thus, Little Red Riding Hood is in fact a Halloween song. 

2. Roky Erickson - “I Walked with a Zombie”

Every year, reliably, Paige’s dad Ned tells us we should cover “I Walked with a Zombie,” and each year we somehow don’t do it. So this live version of the song is for him, just in case this is the closest we ever get. 

Halloween tag

3. Steve Martin - Little Shop of Horrors soundtrack - “Dentist!”

Sure, an alarmingly large and hungry, sharp-toothed plant is scary. But is it as terrifying as a dentist who delights in the pain he inflicts? “I thrill when I drill a bicuspid” — shiver!

4. Hocus Pocus soundtrack - “Sarah’s Theme”

Our definition of a good Halloween movie is way less horrifying than it is lightly spooky, so “Hocus Pocus” is just about ideal for our purposes. This is the sound of Paige’s delighted Halloween youth… though we also just watched it again. Holds up! 

5. The Beatles - “Mr. Moonlight”

Paige pointed out that this is essentially a religious song to the moon — a song of praise, devotion, and submission to a greater power. 

6. Quasi - “Ghost vs. Vampire”

I know that Quasi has had a long and illustrious career, but my fandom is frozen at this pinnacle of mystical bummerness. I learned so much about being creatively sad from Sam Coomes.

7. Rocky Horror Picture Show - “Sweet Transvestite” 

8. The Velvet Underground - “The Gift”

Didn’t realize this was a Halloween song until tonight. If Hitchcock is proper Halloween, which I vote a definite yes, then “The Gift” is ultra Halloween.

9. Bauhaus - “Bela Lugosi’s Dead” 

I feel like I have to say psychic hello to my friend Joseph Grady, who first introduced me not just to the coolness of Peter Murphy but to the allure of vampires generally. I wore my nails and my coats long. We talked about what the vampires were up to that night. We had some truly perfect nights together.

10. The Bitter Tears - “Murdered at the Bar”

An invaluable prize from being in a certain scene in a certain set of years in Chicago with the School of the Art Institute crowd — grad and undergrad. We all loved this song, and 15 or so years later, “we all” turns out to be a very specific and much-loved crew of people I miss and love. Except for Chris Shea, who I love and get to hang out with here in the city. This song is for him especially. 

11. Phantom of the Opera - Korean cast - “Point of No Return”

We had this epiphany accidentally. As I recall, we watched the movie version of “Phantom,” and I was distinctly not impressed, but then Paige put on the French-Canadian version and we were both fascinated by how different it was. That led us into Phantom Internationalé, wherein we just looked up versions from all over the world. It is amazing: each version is both militantly like and distinctly unique from the others. The Korean Phantom emerges as the most singular from among the versions we heard, and “Point of No Return” an emotional height.

Meet Me in St. Louis - “Tootie the Horrible”

One of the greatest Halloween scenes in the history of cinema in our book. 

12. Donovan - “Season of the Witch”

13. “The Dweller of the Cave” * I Found this tape at my parents’ house this summer while we were delayed in Illinois between March and whenever the van got fixed and we drove back. Rediscovering this tape may be why you’re listening to this whole fake radio spooktacular tonight. Hi to Stewart and Jill. 

14. Science Fiction Double Feature *

15. Dr. Who Theme Song*

16. Red Dwarf Theme Song* 

The previous 3 songs were woven into a medley for Sleepy Kitty’s KMNR Freaker’s Ball. It’s one of life’s great pleasures for a band to play Freaker’s Ball, we literally wound around a wooded road to find some Elk’s Lodge or something full of college kids DECKED THE HECK OUT in EPIC COSTUMES ready to freakin’ get down. Never have I been closer to being the band in the prom scene of a 90s movie than at a Freaker’s Ball. We met some rad folks through the KMNR scene, and if I’ve ever told you about my custom vocal pedals, Colin of CroyTone Audio was one of those rad folks we met one of those magical nights. Also, raise your hand if your love Red Dwarf!

17. Ghostbusters 

Paige: “I had this reflector, this flat reflector that was some scrap of something that Ned got from Honeywell. I would play Ghostbusters, and I was like: ‘This is a ghost trap.’ It was SO REAL to me. It was this flat reflector, like a bike reflector, and I would like, like, set traps. And I’d be like, ‘Don’t move my ghost trap!’ I would set the ghost trap, and it was like fishing for ghosts. But that was me playing. I would, like, wait. …I don’t know if it worked or not.”

“I’m not sure if this is me imagining this or not, but I’m pretty sure there was a day where I was like, ‘I feel like this trap’s not working.’ But I also feel like I was like, ‘But how would I know? They could be all inside. This is either full — or empty.’”

Vertigo soundtrack

18. The Fall - “Frightened”

“I don’t wanna dance, I wanna go home” — Fri-dund! 

19. Goblin - “Zombi” Title Theme

20. Karen Elson - “The Ghost Who Walks”

I think we got this record at Third Man Records when we were playing in Nashville. Sean’s new residence! 

Paige: “Karen Elson is tall, beautiful, an interesting musician, AND she has red hair. That’s crazy. What are the chances that you would have all of those things? Talk about a blue moon!”

21. Eartha Kitt - “I Want to Be Evil”

“The only etchings I’ve seen have been behind glass.” 

22. Jeffrey Lewis & Los Bolts - “The Pigeon”

“Old skies you flapped through are no more.”

We would like to give a heartfelt hello to Yona Schimmel, mostly out of reach for now. We mourn every missed knish.

23. Scott Walker - “The Seventh Seal”

Paige didn’t know this was a movie, she thought this was just a cool song about a guy playing chess with death.

24. Groovie Ghoulies - “(She’s My) Vampire Girl”

I love that he puts two Bazooka Joe jokes right in the middle of the song.

25. Black Sabbath - “Paranoid”

Sometimes you need priests to summon spirits. 

26. Fantasia - “A Night on Bald Mountain”

This is a song that seriously disturbed Paige when she was young. She thought that they did this whole demon thing every single Saturday. For me, it made such an impression that, when each of my young friends and I improvised who we were — “I’m Darth Vader!” “I’m a Cylon Raider!” my take was “I’m Night on Bald Mountain”! And I would open my arms wide and pretend that I was an entire sharp mountaintop transforming into a giant demon with wings, and I would always be the biggest and baddest and scariest creature of all, no matter what they thought. Bald Mountain beats Batman every time.

29. “Jump in the Fire”

Or as I say whenever the occasion warrants: “Jump in the show-AHH!” 

28. Rogers & Hammerstein “Pore Jud Is Daid”

29. Barry Adamson - “Something Wicked This Way Comes”

I cannot recall what brought this album to my ears… I suspect it was something I got in my inbox when I worked at The Rocket. This whole album is full of heavy musical grooves and heavy mental movement. It’s a rare pleasure in 

30. Screamin’ Jay Hawkins, “I Put a Spell on You”

This is straight-up one of my favorite recordings of anyone ever. And when I eventually saw it enacted in “Stranger than Paradise,” I was blown away by how fundamentally Eastern European it sounds. Every sound he makes with his voice creates new characters. 

31. The Shining, “Midnight, the Stars & You”

Happy halloween my friends, I wish we were all at an otherwordly dance together.

[lucyinbookland]

Got tagged in this by @literarymagpie, and I’m a sucker for these...

Rules: Tag 10 Tumblrs you want to get to know better.

NAME: Lucy

GENDER: cis female

⭐ SIGN: Pisces

HEIGHT: 5’5”

MIDDLE NAME: Marie

PUT YOUR ITUNES ON SHUFFLE. WHAT ARE THE FIRST 6 SONGS THAT POPPED UP?

1. Any Moment / Moments in the Woods - Into the Woods Musical Cast Recording

2. Time Warp - The Rocky Horror Picture Show Original Soundtrack

3. Friday - Bowling for Soup

4. The Long Grift - Hedwig and the Angey Inch Original Soundtrack

5. Like I Love You - Justin Timberlake on the Songs for Japan cd (I literally don’t think I’ve ever actually listened this song)

6. Battle of Wills - Moana Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (into instrumental)

GRAB THE 📓 NEAREST TO YOU AND TURN TO PAGE 23. WHAT’S LINE 17?

Ok my roommate and I actually used a measuring tape for this, since I’m sitting in a room of bookshelves, and at 100 inches away it’s Daughter of Smoke & Bone by Laini Taylor (beating out Dinotopia at 101 inches).

“There on the paper was Kaz in all his carnality and elegance...”

She’s looking through her sketchbook or something, I dont’t quite remember the context.

EVER HAD A POEM OR SONG WRITTEN ABOUT YOU?

Not yet!

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PLAYED AIR 🎸?

Wednesday, at work. Pretty sure a Queen song came on.

WHO IS YOUR CELEBRITY CRUSH?

James Marsters, Zachary Quinto, and Lucy Lawless have all vied for my attention. Also probably Hank Green, but I think I’m still mostly in denial about that...

WHAT’S A SOUND YOU HATE?

The coffee grinder at my work makes me feel like I’m personally under attack. But worse than that, I CAN NOT STAND IT when multiple conversations are happening at once. My brain totally short-circuits.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS? HOW ABOUT ALIENS?

Ghosts: kind of. My mom swears she’s seen ghosts of lost pets before, and I think I heard one of our deceased cats once. I dont know, not it like a Ghostbusters way, but its not totally impossible?

Aliens: Definitely. Maybe not like Vulcans and shit, but there’s got to be other life out there somewhere, even if we never actually find it or make contact or whatever.

DO YOU DRIVE? IF SO HAVE YOU EVER CRASHED?

I do! I’ve been driving for 12 years and I’ve never been in a crash, so I’m seriously afraid my luck is running out and its only a matter of time...

WHAT WAS THE LAST 📓 YOU READ?

Turtles all the Way Down by John Gree, and before that, rereading one of my favorites, Sunshine by Robin McKinley.

DO YOU LIKE THE SMELL OF PETROL?

Kind of.

WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU SAW?

Moana

WHAT’S THE WORST INJURY YOU’VE EVER HAD?

I used to twist my ankle on the reg and have to wrap it and like use crutches for a day, but I’ve never had any real serious injury. I skinned my knee in Japan in high school, and that was pretty memorably unfortunate because we went swimming in the sea like hours later and it was excruciatingly painful, but worth it, because swimming in warm sea water has got to be one of the weirdest experiences, coming off of life in the Pacific Northwest where the ocean is always super cold.

DO YOU HAVE ANY OBSESSIONS RIGHT NOW?

Apparently I’m perpetually obsessed with Dragon Ball these days, which I’m rolling with. Steven Universe is up there, but not sure if its currently an obsession.

Roommate says I’m a little obsessed with podcasts (Fansplaining, Dear Hank and John, and Welcome to Night Vale, just to name a few).

DO YOU TEND TO HOLD GRUDGES AGAINST ANYONE WHOSE DONE YOU WRONG?

Nope. I’m if anything probably too forgiving. I’ll grumble and vent and stuff, but I tend to switch to sympathy and rationalization at the first sign of remorse.

IN A RELATIONSHIP?

Currently single. (Ladies 😘) (also gentleman) (also just cool people idk hit me up?)

People I’m tagging: @thegorgonist, @takumiismypatronus, @alkcomics, @bzedan @onfroi uhhh I don’t remember anyone else’s Tumblr names...if you see this and you know me, consider yourself tagged?

[jillmckenzie1]

Fight the Power

Why did Mookie throw the trash can? You can see the crowd watching the murder of Radio Raheem at the hands of white cops, their shared looks of horror. Mookie shares the same look, then runs his hands down his face. He’s come to a decision. With deliberate purpose, he walks to a battered trash can, tosses away the lid and the garbage, then lifts up the can.  You can see Mookie break into a run and heave the trash can. It smashes through the window of Sal’s Famous Pizzeria.

The look on his face isn’t one of triumph or exultation. It’s exhaustion.

1989 was the year that put Spike Lee on the map. That summer, he had a hell of a lot of competition at the box office. A third Indiana Jones movie, a second Lethal Weapon, a second Ghostbusters, and Tim Burton’s Batman. You’d think it would be tough for an independent film with a $6 million budget to break through all of that. For anybody other than Spike Lee, it might be impossible.

Do the Right Thing was released on July 21, 1989. White columnist Joe Klein called it “reckless,” and white film critic David Denby wrote that the film, “primes black people to cheer the explosion as an act of revenge.” Lots of white critics thought the film might spark race riots, and not only were they clearly racist, but they also clearly didn’t get the movie. Is it ironic that so-called film experts missed the boat on one of the greatest films ever made, or sadly understandable because so many of those experts were white?

Hold up a moment — have you seen Do the Right Thing? I’ve seen it a ton, and I’ve bought the film three times on three different home video platforms. But we all come to movies at different times. Maybe it’s been a minute since you’ve seen it. Maybe you’ve never seen it. If that’s the case, give it a watch then rejoin me. God, I envy you seeing it for the first time. You’re in for something special.

You’re back? Okay, let’s talk. First thing is to set the stage. Here in Colorado, we have some toasty warm days. They’re nothing compared to a hot day on the East Coast; there’s absolutely no comparison. If you want to get close to feeling what it’s like, wait until the hottest part of the day. Get a set of sheets, soak them in hot water, then wrap yourself in them. Then go outside and try to deal with other people. In short, summers on the East Coast suck.

Summer really sucks if you’re in a city, with people living under you, above you, all around you. If you’re in the Brooklyn neighborhood of Bed-Stuy. Da Mayor (Ossie Davis) awakens, soaked in sweat. He’s an older gent who can already feel it’s gonna be a hot one. If he can just get through the day with a beer, or a few beers, and maybe coax a smile out of Mother Sister (Ruby Dee), everything might work out.

Mookie (Spike Lee) also awakens, and he’s got business to attend to. How long has it been since he’s seen his girlfriend Tina (Rosie Perez) or their son? Too long, but he knows if he’s going to move forward, he needs to get paid. He’s a delivery man for Sal’s Famous Pizzeria, and maybe he has a habit of dicking around during deliveries and hanging with friends. Sal (Danny Aiello) is a little annoyed by this, but he lets it slide. His restaurant has fed the people of Bed-Stuy for years, and that pride carries him. His younger son Vito (Richard Edson) likes the restaurant, likes the neighborhood, and likes Mookie. Older brother Pino (John Turturro) couldn’t disagree more. Why can’t the pizzeria be in their own neighborhood, among their own kind?

At some point, Radio Raheem (Bill Nunn) and Buggin’ Out (Giancarlo Esposito) awaken into the furnace-like heat. It doesn’t seem to bother Radio much. All he needs to be happy is his giant-ass boom box and his Public Enemy tape.* Everyone can hear him coming due to his habit of playing Fight the Power on repeat. Buggin’ Out, though? He seems like one of those guys who was born pissed off and actively looks for things to be pissed off about. When he walks into Sal’s for a slice of pizza, Buggin’ Out notices pictures of famous Italian Americans on the walls, yet no black people. From there, the tension goes up, and the day keeps getting hotter.

If you only know of Do the Right Thing casually, you can be forgiven for thinking it’s a grim and humorless slog of a movie that fixates on racism and rioting. Very few movies can be looked at as perfect. At age 32, Spike Lee made a film that’s essentially perfect.** Shot in the Bedford-Stuyvesant area of Brooklyn, Lee immediately establishes the neighborhood as a distinctive place with fully realized characters. He takes time to introduce us to the trio of older Black men who spend the day ballbusting, the Korean family who owns the small market, the group of teens trying to find a way to beat the heat. The vignettes are hilarious, wistful, romantic, frustrating, and tragic. Lee’s pacing is masterful, and he knows just when to slow things down to give us a glimpse at the lives of these people, and when to crank up the tension another notch.

Lee has also never quite been appreciated as one of the great American screenwriters. Lesser movies would portray white cops as snarling monsters and the residents of the neighborhood as a collection of saints. Firstly, Lee knows that all of his characters are human. One of the white cops tries to stop the brutalization from happening. Radio Raheem is kind of a selfish jerk for walking into Sal’s with his boom box blaring music. The screenplay gives us the time we need to get to know the characters. It also portrays a host of perspectives that occasionally slam into each other. Should Sal hang pictures of prominent black people in his place? Maybe so, since it would go a long way towards inclusivity? Maybe not, since it’s his place and he should be able to decorate it how he likes? That understanding of perspective is power, and it allows us to grieve at both the loss of a man and the loss of a neighborhood institution.

The performances here are an absolute delight. Watch Bill Nunn’s monologue as Radio Raheem about the battle between love and hate. Watch the sweet scene between Danny Aiello’s Sal and Joie Lee’s Jade, where Sal nurses an unrequited crush on the young woman and can only express it by making her a special slice of pizza. Watch Spike Lee’s Mookie navigate the neighborhood and do his part to get ahead. Watch Samuel L. Jackson as Mister Señor Love Daddy, the radio DJ who acts as a Greek chorus throughout the film. There’s not a single false note, not a single person phoning it in.

I’ve seen Do the Right Thing many times. I love it, but it’s the kind of love I hold at arm’s length. I can’t explain it, but it feels like such a special and masterful film that it should only be watched sparingly. There are always exceptions. When the news tells me about a black man in Minneapolis who died in police custody, about crowds of peaceful protestors who are tear-gassed, and about a President more concerned with economic numbers and staged photo-ops than human lives, I can hear the call of this film.

So why did Mookie throw the trash can? Did he do the right thing? Was it because he knew the crowd would tear apart Sal and his sons, and he had one chance to redirect their anger? Was it because his hatred of Sal’s pizzeria and what it truly represented was realized at that moment? Was it because he was simply done? It’s one of the great questions in cinema, and the only wrong answer is that it doesn’t matter. It does matter, it’s always mattered, just like Black lives matter. Do the Right Thing tells us that while everything changes, nothing changes. And that’s the triple truth, Ruth.

  *If you’re a younger reader, you might be confused and frightened by archaic terms like “boom box” and “tape.” Ask a friendly grown-up for clarification.

**Like many male filmmakers, Lee doesn’t have a great track record when it comes to female characters. He objectifies Rosie Perez’s Tina a lot. I suspect Lee would cop to that now. I hope so, anyway.

from Blog https://ondenver.com/fight-the-power/

[thehollowworldofficial]

Elise’s Pitch Wars Welcome!

Hello! My name is Elise Longden, and I’m writing this little introduction because I have written a manuscript and I’m planning to submit it to Pitch Wars, the mentoring programme!

Whilst this little blog is where I record my thoughts about my writing, I’ve never really introduced myself - mostly because I believed I would never let anyone see it. However, the Pitch Wars form has room for a website, and I would rather link this blog as opposed to my Twitter (which is inactive) or my Instagram (which is just full of cosplay and dog photos). 

To clarify, I have written a book called “The Hollow World”. 

Okay so, here’s some stuff about me:

Submission related stuff that potential mentors may be interested in:

In 2017 I won the UK National Flash Fiction Competition run by the University of Chester and was published in an anthology that had also once featured Margaret Atwood (SQUEE!). My piece entitled “Flotsam” can be found here:

 http://www.chester.ac.uk/sites/files/chester/Longden%20Elise%20-%20Flotsam%20FINAL.pdf

I got an A* A-Level grade (It’s not to big myself up...just in case anyone not British doesn’t know what that means!!!!) in Creative Writing, and my coursework, which was 70% of my grade, was the first 30,000 words of my Pitch Wars manuscript.

The idea for “The Hollow World” came to me in a Film Studies class at college. After trying /(and failing) to come up for an idea to base a project around, my teacher gave me an exercise to generate some ideas. She took a few traits typical of Hollywood films, and told me to flip them on their head. Thus, “The Hollow World”, or at least a basis for it, was born, and three (ish) years later, I still can’t get it out of my head. 

Basically the idea of Ashe came from my bizarre urge to see a tiny little girl violently killing things in a film. I thought I was being super original, but the film Logan beat me to it. I can’t even be mad, because Dafne Keen is so incredible?!

The reason why I’m submitting to Pitch Wars, is because I need help. That’s the bottom line. I have edited my manucript the best I can, but I need someone who can take what I’ve written and look at it from a fresh, and new perspective. I am new to the idea of getting my manucript published (though I have always dreamed I would), and navigating the crazy world of publishing and agents and general make-your-writing-an-actual-book stuff....is scary. And I really, really, need your help. I need someone who is honest who can tell me what needs to be done. I’ve done the best I can, and now I need someone who is better than me.

I draw, so here’s some pictures of the characters from the “The Hollow World”, that may hopefully pique your interest:

ASHE 

MAGPIE

NADIA

CASSIDY

SOME FACES

SOME MORE FACES

Whilst these were drawn about a year ago and aren’t my best work, I’m hoping they entice potential mentors, just a ‘lil bit more! :)

Some general stuff about me:

I am a pretty happy and positive person, who loves to work hard. If I have a task or idea inside my head, I will hyperfixate on it until it’s done. For example...this manuscript was unfinished (by about 20,000 words) on the 1st of August. It was my first draft that I hadn’t read through, it was unformatted, it was riddled with errors and inconsistancies, but after meeting the lovely Tomi Adeyemi and talking to her about Pitch Wars, I decided to enter. So I took my jumbled mess, I put my butt into gear, and I spent day after day writing, writing, writing, until I felt happy enought to submit it. I also had to learn what I query letter was, because I am a publishing term noob. My point is, I am willing to push myself, and go all out at 110% percent, if that somehow helps me achieve what I want to achieve.

I am 19 and I live in the UK (specifically near Liverpool). 

I cosplay as well! I’ve been Rey, Leia, and a generic Jedi from Star Wars, Margaery Tyrell and Daenerys Targaryen from Game of Thrones, Pirate King Elizabeth Swann from Pirates of the Caribbean, and I spend 70% of my time in my 13th Doctor costume.

I love Hamilton, and can rap all of it. I love musicals in general tbh.

I have an unhealthy obsession with Moriarty from Sherlock Holmes.

Have I mentioned that the 13th Doctor is the best thing ever to happen to me?

I have a dinosaur hat that I wear whenever I’m sad, because it’s pretty impossible to be sad with a giant T-Rex on your head. And by “hat” I mean this thing:

Pretty majestic, right?

ANYWAY

I’m ace/aro, which is why my book features no romance.

I love my dog Rocky more than anything. He looks like this: 

As well as a mentor who can teach me writer-y things, I’m also looking for a friend, so here’s some stuff I like:

TV Shows: 

Merlin (the love of my life, tbh, and it broke my heart), DOCTOR WHO (especially the 13th Doctor, even though she hasn’t aired yet), Hannibal, Orphan Black, Sense 8, iZombie, TOP GEAR (Yes, the car show. I’m obsessed), Game of Thrones, Parks and Recreation, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Jessica Jones/any Netflix Marvel show, the 100 (early seasons because Lexa), RuPauls Drag Race, Queer Eye, Brooklyn 99, Stranger Things, Sherlock, Agent Carter...I’ve watched a lot okay?

Movies: 

My ultimate favourite movie of all time is What We Do in the Shadows. Even if you’re not going to choose me as a mentee, then please what this dumb film. I love it. I LOVE IT. It’s dark comedy genius, and a real gem. 

Other favourite films are: Wonder Woman, Ghostbusters (2017 version), Ocean’s 8 (will Cate Blanchett adopt me as her ace/aro child?), Marvel Films (particulary Thor: Ragnarok), Star Wars Films, Kingsman Films, John Wick Films, Pirates of the Carribbean Films, Harry Potter Films,Mad Max: Fury Road, Peter Pan Goes Wrong (if you pick me I’ll force you to watch it at some point, sorry), Disney Films (Mulan, Up!, and Hercules are my faves).

Books: 

Some that don’t need an explanation: Harry Potter, A Song of Ice and Fire, His Dark Materials, Lord of the Rings. Anything by Neil Gaiman, Margaret Atwood, or Stephen King.

My favourite series, and arguably my “Harry Potter” is the Skulduggery Pleasant series by Derek Landy. I’ve met Derek multiple times, and his books are just hilarious, soul-destorying, and MAGIC. I love them.

A Closed and Common Orbit by Becky Chambers - Seriously, this Sci-Fi book is one of the most striking books I’ve ever read, mostly because it surprised me with it’s tender story, honest representations of real people, and general WOW-ness. I love it, and its flashbacks heavily influenced my own manuscript. You know when you love a book so much that you wish you could eat it? This is that book for me.

Moriarty by Antony Horowitz. My favourite villain of all time in a book that blew my mind? Yes please.

The Girl in 6E by A.R.Torre. I picked up this book for a quid in the supermarket, and it utterly suprised me. It’s about a sex-worker murder-obsessed cam girl who is asked to act out something on camera that’s a little too disturbing, so she tracks down the man who asked her in order to save a little girl from a vile act. Think Maestra meets The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. It’s not the most sophisticated reading with all of the bizarre sexual stuff, but the wit and exasperation of the main character makes up for it. I love anything that surprises me, and this book was something I'd never seen before.

Anything (memoir or fiction) by Carrie Fisher. As a Star Wars nerd I knew I would love her work, but when I read them I was blown away by how poignant, poetic, and wonderous Carrie Fisher’s writing is. She seems to find the perfect balance between humour and emotion, and reading them was a genuine joy. Each funny sentence makes me laugh out loud, but each serious sentence is heavy, poised, and so amazingly crafted and emotional. 

Children of Blood and Bone by Tomi Adeyemi. I was lucky enough to meet Tomi on her UK tour, and I gave her my very long letter and a portfolio of art. I love the book, and I love even more what it stands for, and there’s not much else I can really say.

Other books I loved in no order: The Power by Naomi Alderman, The Cursed Prince by Holly Black, The Hunger Games series by Suzanne Collins, the Chaos Walking series by Patrick Ness, the Percy Jackson series by Rick Riordan, Throne of Glass by Sarah J Maas, The Time Traveller’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger, the Gone series by Michael Grant, The Book Thief by Markus Zusak, The Martian and Artemis by Andy Weir, Lost Stars by Claudia Gray, Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn, Room by Emma Donoghue, Wicked by Gregory Maguire....and a helluva lot more....

And just so you know, here’s what I look like:

(I’m the human dressed as the 13th Doctor)

Hopefully this gives you an idea about me and my personality! I’m sorry this is so long, I just wanted to make sure I came across in an okay way! If any potential mentors are reading this, thank you for taking the time to! 

If you want to read the notes/journal entries I kept on this blog when I was writing and editing my manucript, just search the tag #update! 

My Twitter is: https://twitter.com/EliseLongden 

My Instagram is:  instagram.com/elise.longden/ (here you will find a lot of cosplay and dog pictures, and I’m not sorry)

If you have any questions or anything else you want to know, please feel free to shoot me an ask! Or just say hi!

[dailynynews-blog]

The Inside Scoop on the Sony Pictures Studios Tour

New Post has been published on https://www.usatelegraph.com/2018/inside-scoop-sony-pictures-studios-tour/

The Inside Scoop on the Sony Pictures Studios Tour

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Get a Glimpse of Movie & TV Magic on the Sony Pictures Studios Tour

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Sony Pictures Studios Tour is one of several movie and TV studio tours in Los Angeles. The Sony tour is a two hour walking tour of the working studios in Culver City that produce long-running game shows like Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy as well as a variety of sitcoms, dramas and feature films.

This particular studio lot began in 1915 and spent the years from 1924 to 1986 as Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer or MGM, which produced some of the most famous movies in history. The studio had a brief stint changing names and hands before various partnerships ended and began, resulting in the new and improved Sony Pictures Entertainment. Their film division includes Columbia Pictures, TriStar Pictures and Screen Gems.

Like all studio tours, what you see will depend on what is going on that day. The more that’s going on, the better chance of spotting a random celebrity walking across the lot, but the less you get to see of the inner workings. Most tours manage to show you a game show set, an interior set of a comedy or drama and at least one production element for sound or video.

On my visit, our Cleveland-born tour guide, Michael was very informative and entertaining, and spoke clearly and slowly enough for the international tourists with us to easily understand him – which was a bonus, since some tour guides talk really fast.

The first stop on the tour is under the 94-foot high, 188-foot-long steel rainbow, which was installed in 2012, and can be seen for miles from higher elevations. The giant arc is made of 100,000 pounds of steel covered with aluminum color panels. It was designed by artist Tony Tasset, who was inspired by The Wizard of Oz, which was filmed on the lot.

Right under the Rainbow, we visited the Columbia Pictures offices, where you can see all 12 of the Best Picture Oscars on display. Then we proceeded to the Rita Hayworth cafeteria, where Louis B. Mayer went to a lot of trouble to make sure the chef knew how to make matzo ball soup.

We walked through the set of The Goldbergs – a single-camera comedy that is not shot in front of a live audience – and got to walk through the school hallway and the Goldbergs’ living room, where the furniture was covered – according to Michael – to protect it from the studio cats between tapings. I’ve seen sets covered similarly at other studios, but never heard that particular explanation before.  

A real highlight for me as a singer was getting a look inside the Barbra Streisand Scoring Stage. The 96-channell recording studio has been used to score countless films and TV shows, and is in high demand for its perfect acoustics. Just as Rita Hayworth was not responsible for the cafeteria, Streisand has no personal investment in the recording studio, but has recorded there. The very first song to be recorded in the studio was Judy Garland singing Somewhere Over the Rainbow.

In addition to Judy Garland, other child stars like Elizabeth Taylor and Mickey Rooney also got their start on this lot, playing in the big league with such stars as Greta Garbo, Clark Gable, Spencer Tracy and Joan Crawford. Notable films include The Wizard of Oz, Singing in the Rain, The Tin Man, Mutiny on the Bounty, Gigi, and National Velvet were shot on the original backlot, part of which was sold off in the 1970s by then-owner Kirk Kerkorian to fund the MGM Grand hotel chain. Most of the sound stages used for those films are still intact, but the outdoor sets are now covered in homes and businesses, so you can’t walk down the street of Singin’ in the Rainanymore. Since most of the backlot was sold off, there are fewer outdoor film sets at Sony Pictures Studios than Warner Bros., Paramount Pictures, or Universal Studios Hollywood, however the facades of all the offices do double duty as filming locations, so there’s a nice diversity of architecture.

Like other studio tours, photos are not allowed in most of the indoor set locations you visit. The exception on our tour was the Jeopardy set, where we were allowed to take pictures of the actual set, and they also have a nice little photo op set up where you can take a photo of yourself as a Jeopardy contestant. You can also grab a shot of their many decades of EMMY Awards displayed in a glass case.

The tour ends with an outdoor display of a few notable vehicles including two from Ghostbusters and the bullet-ridden RV from Breaking Bad. There’s a stop in the gift shop – where the deal of the day for us was a pre-packaged turkey sandwich for three bucks. On the way back to the parking garage, we got to pick up our green-screen photo (included) that was shot at the beginning of the tour.

Sony Pictures Studio Tours 10202 West Washington Blvd Culver City, CA 90232 (310) 244-TOUR (8687) www.sonypicturesstudiostours.com  Hours: Monday through Friday, 9:30, 10:30, 1:30, 2:30 (subject to change)

Save on the Sony Pictures Studios Tour with the Go Los Angeles Card.

Click through the slides for a tour preview & more fun facts.

More:

Star Struck: Celebrity Experiences in LA

Getting TV Show Tickets in LA

Entertainment Industry Museums in LA

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The Jeopardy Exhibit and Set at Sony Pictures

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I’ve done all the studio tours in Los Angeles, and the Jeopardy set on the Sony Pictures Studios Tour is the only time we were ever allowed to take photos of a working set. They also had this cool photo op set up in the lobby where you could get a shot of yourself as a contestant.

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The Rainbow Over Sony Pictures Studios

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The Rainbow on the Sony Pictures lot was not created for any film or TV show, it is a public art project created as part of the 1% for the Arts project in California, where all new construction is required to put 1% of the total budget toward one or more art projects. This piece, created by artist Tony Tasset in 2012, required 150 people to manufacture and install.

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The Barbra Streisand Scoring Stage at Sony Pictures Studios

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Only about ten to twenty percent of visitors to Sony Pictures Studios get to go inside the Barbra Streisand Scoring Stage because its perfect acoustics are in high demand for audio recording.

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Sony Picture Studios Madison Gate

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There are three gates to the Sony Pictures lot. This one on Madison Avenue is the one you walk through at the beginning of the tour after meeting in the office building across the street, where there’s also an underground parking garage with free parking for tour guests.