#I’ve had much worse commutes

[panthermouthh]

Just realised my bright morning drives to work are going to fade away in to darkness and cold again. Day ruined

[unseededtoast]

I'd Wait For You | Spencer Reid x F! Reader

Summary: In which you find that a broken engagement leads you to the love of your life. (Friends to lovers)

Also cross-posted on Wattpad and AO3. Link to my masterlist for everything else I’ve posted

wc: 6.9k

"You have no idea how long I've waited for you." 

There is something weird in the air this morning, Spencer feels it the second he wakes up, but is unable to put his finger on what it is. As he goes about his morning routine he continues to ponder what this feeling could be from. He hadn't forgotten to turn in any papers, there is no rush to get to work, there is simply nothing going on that would cause this unsettling feeling that takes residence in his chest. But it persists nonetheless.

His commute to work is no better either, the sense of dread looms over him for no particular reason, and the anxiety causes him to pick at the skin around his nails, a bad habit he had stopped long ago. Spencer doesn't consider himself to be superstitious, but this is all beginning to feel a little foreboding to him. But he tries his best to mask the feeling as he walks through the familiar BAU doors, ready to distract himself with whatever tasks get assigned to him today.

The rest of the team shows up a few minutes later than he did, everyone taking their time to get settled at their desks. They had just returned from a case yesterday, so a day in the office is much appreciated.

The minutes slowly tick by and everyone but Spencer begins working on something, he just can't seem to focus today. Instead of trying to force himself to do work, he decides a cup of coffee might bring some sense of normalcy to the morning.

He picks his favorite mug and makes his coffee just as he usually does, but he takes his time stirring in the sugar, becoming entranced in the swirl within the cup as he stirs and stirs. Emily and JJ's voice outside the break room break his trance and he tosses the stir stick away as they walk in, happily talking about something.

"Did you hear?" Emily asks Spencer with a smile on her face. Spencer's eyebrows crease and he recalls the past few days, trying to remember if she is expecting good news. But he comes up short. With a shake of his head, he glances between the two.

"Hear what?" With his question, JJ turns her phone around to show Spencer a picture. As he realizes what is on her screen, he swears he feels his heart stop beating.

"She got engaged!" JJ exclaims, as if it's the best news she will hear all year. And while it might be the best news for her, it couldn't be worse for Spencer.

"About time too." Emily says, looking at Spencer expectantly. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he nods shortly.

"Yeah." He tears his eyes away from JJ's screen and brushes by the two of them to get out of the room as quickly as possible, forgetting his coffee on the counter.

Spencer swiftly walks through some of the quieter halls in the office until he finds a secluded conference room. With unsteady hands, he closes the door behind him and lets out a breath he didn't realize he was holding. His mind races with a hundred different thoughts at once, all of them revolving around the photo of you with a shiny ring on your finger.

Spencer should be happy for you, he should be over the moon that you had found happiness. But instead all he feels is sick to his stomach and like he had been kicked in the chest. He closes his eyes tightly, trying to keep tears at bay as he vividly remembers the moment he knew he was head over heels for you. It's a bittersweet memory for him, and one he thinks of quite often.

You had been on the team for a few months when Hotch assigned you and Spencer to put together the geographic profile together. You jumped at the opportunity, eager to learn something new, and he was excited to get to know you better. While the two of you worked together, Spencer couldn't help but notice the sweet smell of your perfume and how you nibbled on your lips as you concentrated. He found himself getting sidetracked by you more and more often, and couldn't help the pink flush of his cheeks whenever you glanced his way. It was on the third morning of working together when he realized that he had started to fall for you; the shiver that ran down his spine confirmed it as your hands brushed when you handed him a cup of coffee.

But that was four years ago, and nothing is the same.

As the memory fades, Spencer tries to pull himself together by straightening his tie and taking a few deep breaths. He's sure that Emily and JJ will have questions, but he's hoping they won't pry into the matter. Although he's sure that they've told everyone else how he ran off.

Once he feels like he's not going to cry at the mention of your name, he leaves the empty conference room and goes back to his desk where he has reports waiting for him. It's wishful thinking, but he hopes they offer some distraction from you. His foot taps with each pen stroke across the page, and he does his best to ignore Morgan's eyes staring at him a few feet away.

"You okay?" Morgan doesn't let Spencer ignore him any longer. With a sigh, Spencer puts the pen down and looks to Morgan, who appears to be studying every microexpression on Spencer's face.

"I'm fine." Spencer tries his best to keep his tone even and nonchalant.

"You don't seem fine." Spencer knows that Derek is just trying to be a good friend, and he appreciates that, but he knows he can't talk about what's bothering him here. Not in front of the team, and not in front of curious eavesdroppers. So to deflect the conversation away from what's really bothering him, Spencer gives a halfhearted answer just to be done with it.

"I guess I'm just ready for the weekend." Spencer quickly averts his gaze away from Derek's, his eyes catching the only photograph that resides on his desk.

It was a picture taken four years ago with the whole team, you had asked for a group photo before you left, and Spencer had printed one for himself as well. You were in the middle of the group, one arm wrapped around Spencer while the other wrapped around Emily. A wide, bright smile was on your face, but he knew if he looked hard enough he could see the tears you fought away, the same ones that broke loose immediately after the camera's flash.

Before you left you had admitted to Spencer that you didn't really want to leave, but your boyfriend had received a job offer he couldn't refuse, one that was across the country. Every bit of Spencer wanted to beg you to stay, but he knew how happy your boyfriend made you, and he couldn't bear to see you unhappy. So he swallowed his pride and encouraged you to go, to embrace new opportunities; but he made a point to let you know that you would always be welcomed back with open arms.

The night you left Spencer remembers how he cried for hours, looking at the photo and knowing that he would likely never see you again. He knew he would never be able to forget your smile, your kindness, and all of your quirks that he had fallen in love with over the years. His heart constricted with the thought of another man's hands on you, but he could only blame himself, for he had never found the courage to tell you how he really felt.

-----

Rain splatters on the windshield as you speed down the highway, the wipers trying their hardest to keep your view clear. Your mind had become numb to the inclement weather at this point, having already traveled eighteen hours of the twenty five hour journey; a journey you never thought you'd make. But here you are, driving on an empty highway in the middle of the night, alone.

Mile after mile flies by, your thoughts replaying yesterday's events over and over again like an unhealthy obsession. It had come as a shock, walking into your home to see your fiancé with another woman on his lap. You weren't expected back home for a few more hours, but your boss had let you go early.

You remember vividly how excited you were to come home early for once, to spend time with your fiancé because work had been keeping you busy. But that excitement turned to nausea within a second. She had her arms around his neck, he had his hands on her waist, both of their faces flushed. Of course he tried to tell you it was a misunderstanding.

"It's not what it looked like." He begged you as you zipped up your last suitcase. Without sparing him a glance, you wheeled the luggage to the front door, unusually calm despite the circumstances. Your hand rested on the cold handle and you cleared your throat.

"Don't call me, don't text me. If I left something here I will have my attorney contact you." Is all you said before you left your home of four years. Maintaining composure, you placed the bag in the back of your car and got inside.

As soon as your home disappeared from view in your rearview mirrors, the dam broke. Tears fell quickly down your cheeks, harsh breaths wracked your chest, your hands tightly gripped the steering wheel. You must've cried for hours before the tears dried, your breathing had leveled, and your aching hands eased up on the wheel. Within the blink of an eye, your life had been turned upside down and you had no idea how to pick up the pieces.

You decided to go back to Washington D.C., the one place you really ever considered home, after a few hours of driving East. Truthfully, you have no idea what you're going to do or where you're going to go once you get there, and you only have a few hours to figure it out. But you have blind faith that you'll figure something out, even if it does take a few days.

-----

The next day, you wake in a hotel room, enveloped in pristine white covers. The sun peeks through the heavy curtains, and you rub the sleep from your eyes. Checking your phone, you see dozens of missed calls and unanswered text messages from your now ex-fiancé. It seems he can't follow instructions very well. You ignore his messages and delete his voicemails without listening to them, you have no desire to waste your time listening to his lies.

You scroll through your contact list and block his number, eager to be rid of the man as fast as possible. While scrolling, your thumb lands on a distantly familiar name, and an idea blooms in your mind. Your eyes read over his contact card for a second, Aaron Hotchner, your old boss. You could always call and see if there's any chance the team would take you back. Though it would be humiliating to explain why you had come back, you'd be lying if you said you didn't miss the team who became your family.

The thought of being reunited with them is enough to send Aaron a text before you can talk yourself out of it. It's a simple message, and right to the point. If there's one thing you remember about Hotch, it's how he appreciated conciseness.

Your phone finds its way to the side table as you get out of bed and get ready for the day. You had no plans in particular, and you had the hotel room booked for another week, so there was no immediate rush to get out. Today you would allow yourself to meander aimlessly and tomorrow you would get serious about finding a place to rent.

Halfway through your unplanned day, your phone buzzes in your pocket and your heart drops. There's only one person it could be. Not having the patience or restraint to wait, you pull your phone out immediately and read the text from Aaron.

"Come by the office tomorrow." The message is simple, in true Aaron fashion and a smile breaks out on your face, happy that something is finally starting to look up.

-----

Familiar glass doors are feet away from you, the FBI logo engraved into the glass, they look exactly like you remembered. Your heart thumps in your chest with each footstep towards the door. You hadn't told anyone but Hotch about wanting to come back, but you know when you walk through these doors that all hell is going to break loose. With a deep, calming breath, you open the doors and start towards Hotch's office casually.

But of course, as fate would have it, you don't make it there without being noticed. To your right, you hear a gasp, then another, and then suddenly your name is being called out by your old friends. Turning to face them, it's like everything is starting to click and fall into place. Emily and JJ rush over to you, smiles on their faces, and you can't help but smile as well. You've missed your team dearly.

"I didn't know you were coming!" Emily says as she wraps you in a warm hug, to which you return.

"Yeah, it was kind of unplanned actually." You say, stepping back from her arms. JJ and Emily look at you expectantly, but instead of giving them the answer they're wanting to hear, you take another step back and look to Hotch's office.

"We'll catch up later." JJ smiles, noticing your eagerness to get to Hotch. You nod before turning away. With a light knock, you knuckles make contact with the wooden office door.

"Come in." Hotch's deep voice calls out.

When you enter, he stands with a ghost of a smirk on his face and extends his hand. You return his handshake and take a seat in front of his desk.

"It's good to see you again." He says as he sits back down and you sigh, looking around at the office. Hotch really hasn't changed anything since you've been gone.

"Yeah, it feels good to be here again." You answer truthfully, meeting his eyes.

"I assume this isn't just a visit?" He questions, interlocking his fingers together in front of him.

"Perceptive as always. But you're right. Listen, I haven't told anyone but I am no longer with my fiancé and I was wondering if the team had a vacancy you're looking to fill." You get right to the point and your stomach turns with anxiety. Hotch's eyebrows lift at your words and you can tell he hadn't been expecting those words to come out of your mouth. But after a few moments of contemplation, he finally answers.

"We would be glad to have you back. When can you start?" You blink a few times, trying to process that he had actually welcomed you back and hadn't let you down gently, like you had half been expecting.

"I um, I can start whenever." You say, stumbling over your words with excitement. This time, a noticeable smile adorns Hotch's face.

"How about you get settled back here first, then we can talk about coming back." He says and you agree, knowing that having a stable place to live first is probably the right thing to take care of before diving headfirst into work again.

After catching up with Hotch, he allows you to mingle around the bullpen, where your old friends have been anxiously waiting. You can tell from the look on their faces that they're expecting some sort of explanation, and you can't help yourself but share the news.

"I'm back!" You say with a wide smile. JJ and Emily cheer, Morgan comes and claps you on the back, and even Penelope comes out and talks a million miles a minute about how you need to tell them everything. And while you love being back with your team, you can't help but notice how Spencer lingers in the background.

Spencer and you had grown very close over your years together, and once you had moved away you hadn't really heard from him. It hurt, but you understood and didn't want to pressure him to keep contact. But you really had missed him. You catch his eye from across the room and you smile, knowing that once you're back full time that you will have a lot of time to catch up with him, and you hope that you're able to pick up right where you left off.

----- "Well it looks like you're getting quite the welcome back. Four women went missing in Athens, Tennessee. All four of them were found on the same day in the same manner. They had their arms tied behind their backs and their heads were submerged under water. But the medical examiner does not believe they died by drowning." Penelope briefs the team on the newest case and as she speaks you study the images in front of you.

It's been years since you've worked a case, or really in any law enforcement capacity at all. Once you had moved out west with your ex-fiancé you had decided to take a job as a daycare teacher. It was a nice change of pace for a while, but it makes getting back into the BAU lifestyle that much more difficult. After being surrounded by innocent children for years, you're now being re-immersed in a world full of psychopaths and it feels overwhelming.

You sit back as the team discusses early theories. Once upon a time you would have jumped in with your own thoughts, but you suddenly feel under qualified to be here. It has you second guessing whether this was the right decision or not. But before you can dwell on that for very long, the team is loading the jet and speeding off to Tennessee.

While on the jet, Hotch assigns everyone their duties, and you find yourself being paired with Spencer, just like you usually were. Being paired with him ignites a feeling of excitement within you. You still hadn't been able to catch up with him properly, but you're hoping this could change that.

Everyone keeps to themselves for the majority of the ride, busying themselves with reviewing the case and resting up. Once upon a time, you usually tried to sneak in a nap on the way to a new case, but the nerves creeping around in your veins keep you unable to do so, instead you worry about performing well for the sake of your reputation.

When the plane lands, the team hits the ground running. Some members go to the medical examiner's office, others go to interview the families, while you and Spencer are left to piece together the geographical profile. He's spread a map out on a table and marked where the bodies were found.

You pitch in when you feel comfortable with your findings, such as where the victims were last seen. The beginning of the process is fairly straight forward, it isn't until the deduction part until you start feeling dread and nervousness. Spencer hadn't said a single word directly to you, he's only spoken into the open air and you've responded.

"Well, what if they were all going to the doctor for the same condition?" You pitched in and Spencer hummed in response. And for the first time, he finally acknowledges you directly.

"You might actually be onto something. Let me call Garcia." His words are rushed and he leaves the room as the phone dials. Your heart sinks as he leaves. This isn't like how it used to be at all. No, you and Spencer were always a dynamic duo, but this feels very static and compartmentalized.

Perhaps it's because he's unsure if your abilities are still up to par. Or maybe he's still upset that you left in the first place. You couldn't be sure, but you hoped that this phase would pass soon so that you could have your dear friend back.

-----

You look at the clock with burning eyes, seeing that it's already one in the morning. The rest of the team had left for the motel hours ago, but you and Spencer had stayed at the station, having struck gold with Garcia. Apparently, all of the victims had contracted a very unique disease and so you and Spencer had researched that disease extensively to locate where they could've contracted it from.

So far, there was a very limited list of possibilities. With your mind becoming more fuzzy with exhaustion you know you're not being a very good teammate. Yawning, you break the long-standing silence and stand from your seat.

"I think I'm going to go to the motel, I'm exhausted and I can't comprehend anything I'm reading anymore." You announce, throwing away your empty coffee cup from hours earlier. Spencer caps the marker he's using and straightens his posture.

"Yeah, I'll go with you." He rubs his eyes as he stands, and the two of you walk out of the station together.

The night is warm and you appreciate the night sky as the two of you walk back to the motel. Your brain feels like it's been put through a meat grinder, and the unrelenting nerves double down on your exhaustion. It feels like your feet weigh twenty pounds each and so when you finally reach the motel, it's like seeing an oasis in the desert. Spencer goes in for the keys to your room and to his room and you notice the teams' cars parked in the lot.

"Bad news." Spencer says as he walks back from the lobby.

"What?" Dread fills you and you're not sure how much more you can take before you mentally break and physically collapse.

"They had to rent out one of our rooms, I guess they made a deal with Hotch for a partial refund. So, the two of us are going to be in room B12." He says, swinging the keys from his finger.

"You're kidding." Your voice is monotone. All you had wanted was some space alone, but you can't even be afforded that luxury. Instead of arguing or complaining further though, you just sigh and head towards room B12, where you trust the others have relocated your items.

You hear Spencer follow closely behind you and he unlocks the door once you reach it. Inside, there's one bed and one small armchair. The two of you just stand in the doorway, staring at the inadequate accommodations.

"I can go see if I can get the keys to one of the cars." Exhaustion is thick in your voice and you feel beat down and defeated from the day.

"No, you don't have to do that. I can take one of the cars." Spencer speaks up as you turn to leave and you meet his eyes, tiredness obvious.

"Spencer you're too tall. No, just let me it's okay." You take a step forward, but he catches your upper arm.

"Listen, Hotch needs the sleep, he hasn't been resting well lately. So why don't we just try to figure something out here." He lets go of your arm and closes the door behind him. At this point, you just want to sleep and so you agree.

"Yeah, sure. I'm going to get changed." You say and rub your eyes as you go to rummage around your bag for something comfortable. As you go to the bathroom, you hear Spencer messing with the blankets.

Once the door is closed behind you, you grip the edge of the counter and look in the mirror. Your bloodshot eyes stare back and the anxiety of the day catches up to you with full force. Feelings of inadequacy and disappointment fill you and you worry that you're letting the team down by not being able to solve things faster. Once again you find yourself wondering if coming back was the right decision.

You let go of the counter and change, ready to pass out for a few hours and be dead to the world, hoping that your anxieties don't also infiltrate your dreams. When you exit you see that Spencer has changed as well, and has also constructed a sort of pillow wall in the middle of the bed. You can't help but smile at his efforts.

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" You ask, not wanting to make him uncomfortable. After all your years of knowing Spencer, you knew he valued his personal space. He nervously nods and clears his throat as you approach the bed.

"Yeah, it's fine. Are you sure your fiancé isn't going to care?" His words are calculated and from the look on his face you can tell he had been stressing over this for a little while.

Looking down at your finger, you see the glistening ring and you spin it around a few times, remembering what it used to symbolize. You hadn't wanted to tell anyone about the break up just yet, but you know you have to tell Spencer now, or he'll be up all night worrying about the fiancé he thinks you have.

"I um, I don't have a fiancé anymore." Your voice is soft and you hear the vulnerability in it. Unable to meet Spencer's eyes, you just keep staring at the ring.

"But I thought, you're wearing the ring, and JJ said that-" He stumbles over his words and you finally look up to him, seeing him in an almost panicked state.

"We broke up. I left him, actually. I came home and saw another woman on top of him." You admit, fingers leaving the ring as you mention the infidelity. His eyes glance down to the ring before he meets your eyes again.

"I'm sorry I didn't know." He says with exasperation and you shrug but beneath your calm demeanor you feel the repressed sadness and anger within you.

"I wasn't going to tell anyone yet but I didn't want you to worry. But yeah, I left that same night and haven't looked back." You sit on the edge of the bed and Spencer follows suit, the two of you almost shoulder to shoulder and it feels like your friend is coming back to you.

"You didn't deserve that." His voice is kind and soft.

"I know. I just wish I hadn't wasted all that time on him. I wish I hadn't moved away from everyone. I missed you all every single day and for all of it to have been for nothing is just, it's a hard pill to swallow." You tell him, unable to keep your thoughts to yourself for any longer. You feel tears burning the rims of your eyes and for the first time since that day, you allow yourself to feel the emotions you've worked hard to ignore.

"Come here. I've missed you too. We all have. But we're so happy to have you back." Spencer wraps an arm around your shoulder and pulls you into him. He rubs small circles on your back as you sniffle, and you're thankful for him. This feels like the Spencer you know and a familiar comfort overcomes you.

You remember all the cases where he would help you deal with the trauma. After particularly hard cases, he would always remind you that you were welcome to call or drop by anytime, that he would be there any hour. In the mornings he would bring you coffee and he'd ask about your night or weekend. Everything with Spencer was always effortless.

And after a few minutes had passed, you and Spencer get into bed, pillow wall be damned as you link your pinky with his, just to know that he's here with you. That night your fears and anxieties did not follow you into your dreams.

-----

Spencer knows he shouldn't be happy to hear that you left you fiancé. As your friend, he should be upset with you and sympathetic. But instead all he feels is a deep sense of relief.

Since working side by side with you, the shiny ring on your finger had become quite the annoying distraction. Every time it caught the light it served as a reminder that he could never have you. But now, it no longer holds any power over him.

And when you link your pinky with his, an unfamiliar feeling blooms within him. One of hope, one that had long died inside of him when you moved away.

He's happy that you came back and before he falls asleep with you by his side, he promises himself that he will not lose this opportunity. This is his second chance and he will take it when he finds the right time.

-----

Three days later and the case is coming to a close, you can feel it in your bones. You and Spencer had begun working as a duo once again and successfully put together a full geographic profile.

Now, all that's left is to locate the suspect and bring him in for questioning. You and Spencer sit around a table waiting for the others to come back from their field investigations, and you can't help but notice how his hair is curlier than you remember.

Not only is his hair curlier, but you notice how the sun brings out the honey tones in his eyes. His long fingers lock together as he looks over a map, which is what you should be doing as well, but instead find yourself admiring Spencer.

He had grown in the last five years, blossomed into the bright man you knew him to be and he seems more comfortable in his own skin. You're happy he's finding his stride. And you can't deny the newfound confidence looks good on him.

With the realization that your thoughts had taken a turn, you snap yourself back to focus on the task at hand. There's no way you were just checking out Spencer of all people. No way. As quick as they manifested themselves, you repressed them deep within your mind.

Thankfully the others arrive back with good news, they've found the suspect; he was almost exactly in the center of the projected safe zone you and Spencer had established. They don't stay long as they gather the sheriff and some deputies before they go and arrest the man. You're sure that the team has found the right man, and you believe he's going to crack as soon as they put some pressure on him. You and Spencer stay behind to lend technical support if they need it.

Turns out, you were right again. It took all of ten minutes before the suspect confessed. The man who wanted to be seen as confident crumbled into a sobbing mess under Hotch's questions. He was taken to the county jail in cuffs and the team was left to pack up and head back to Quantico. You had forgotten what it felt like, what it really felt like, to solve a case. The feeling sinks in and you remember just how much you've missed this job. 

The jet ride back to Quantico is fairly silent. Everyone has found their own thing to do and while they decompressed you looked out the window. The view from the jet never really got old, you always found some beauty staring out into the clouds. But eventually, your eyes drift from the wispy clouds to Spencer, who has opted to take a nap on the journey home. And once again, you come to appreciate him more so than you ever have for his continued friendship. 

You're happy that you came back, and you look forward to what the future may hold. 

-----

The night is chilly but the sky is clear. You and Spencer walk side by side down a path alongside a river, the two of you stressed about work and thankful to finally have a Friday night to yourselves. Of course, the others all had plans, except for you and Spencer, so you both decided to take a late night walk.

You look up to the sky and admire the stars, seeing some shining brighter than others. You're sure Spencer has a fun fact as to why that is, but you're perfectly happy to just walk beside him in quiet content. It's been a month now since you've been back and you feel like you and Spencer had grown closer than ever before in that short amount of time. 

Your gaze shifts from the stars to him, admiring his side profile and how defined his features are. There's no denying that he's grown into his features nicely, and you can't help but to appreciate his beauty, inside and out. 

Eventually the path leads you to a small stone bridge that arches over the river. Crickets chirp in the distance and the moonlight reflects beautifully off the calm water. Leaning forward on the stones, you take a deep breath of crisp air and close your eyes to appreciate the moment of peace. 

"You're still wearing your ring." Spencer's voice breaks the silence between you. Looking down, you see how the diamond is reflecting the moonlight. It's a beautiful ring, yet you had never been so disgusted with a piece of jewelry. 

"Yeah." You twist the ring around and around on your finger before you take it off.

"Are you going to tell the others? I know they've been asking." He says and you nod slowly. 

"Yeah, I'm going to tell them, I just don't know how to I guess. They're all so happy that I've 'found the one' but, he was the furthest thing from my soulmate. I just don't want them to pity me." You say, meeting his eyes. Spencer leans on the bridge's railing as well, his eyes trained on the ring in front of you. 

"You know you don't owe them anything, right? They'll understand." He encourages, and you know he's right but you can't help but feel anxious about it. 

"I know they will." You say, looking back down to the ring. 

What once used to symbolize loyalty and undying love is now nothing more than a reminder of the time you had wasted and the time you'll never be able to get back. It reminds you of how you bent over backwards to please that man, one who used and took advantage of you. Anger rises within you and in a split second decision, you toss the ring into the river below. 

It sinks to the bottom, out of your sight forevermore. And as it sinks it feels like a weight has been lifted off of your shoulders. You feel free, untethered.

"I didn't mean for you to throw it away you probably could've sold it for a good amount of money." Spencer rattles off, obviously flustered that you just threw a thousand dollar ring into the river. But you just shrug, at peace with your decision. 

"It was worthless." You say with conviction. Spencer's lips fall apart and your heart beats faster when you meet his eyes. 

"Come on, it's getting cold out here." You break yourself out of your own thoughts and Spencer nods, offering you his arm. 

You link your arm with his as the two of you walk back to the parking lot and it feels right. Being around Spencer feels effortless and you feel like you can be your true, most authentic self around him without worrying about judgment. His presence makes you feel safe and secure, and as you walk you rest your head on his arm lightly, grateful to have him.

-----

"No I think you put it on backwards." Spencer says, reading the instruction manual again. You take a step back and look at the chair you're trying to assemble and see that he's most definitely correct. 

"I think you're right. Why is building a chair this complicated?" You ask as you sit back down and begin disassembling the part you had just put on. 

It's now been four months since you've been back. In that time you've found an apartment and have decided to finally furnish it. And thanks to Spencer, you don't have to assemble the furniture alone. The two of you had put together a credenza, a bookshelf, a side table, and now are tackling the chairs, which are proving to be more of a challenge than anticipated. 

After another hour, the chairs are finally assembled. Spencer collapses on your couch dramatically as you push the last one in to complete the dining set. Feeling like he deserves some thanks for helping you today, you go to the kitchen and pour him a glass of wine. 

You return to your couch and sit next to him, putting the glass in his hand. He hums in appreciation and takes a sip. Before you partake in your own glass, you go and turn on the fireplace, feeling like it would complete the atmosphere. The amber glow from the flames envelope the two of you in warmth, and you take a long sip of your wine. 

It's not unusual for Spencer to be over at your apartment anymore, he had been coming over pretty consistently since the night you two had taken a walk over the river. It's like something changed that night between the two of you; like throwing the ring was symbolic of more than just unloading past baggage. It's like it allowed you to move on and start anew. 

Lately, you found yourself thinking about Spencer more and more often. When he wasn't around you find yourself missing him. You miss his humor, his comfort, just everything about him. Every time he knocks on your door butterflies erupt in your tummy and you're unable to keep the smile off your face. 

You had denied the feelings for a while, explaining them away as just sentiments of friendship. But eventually, you had come to realize that you had slowly fell in love with your best friend. He makes your days brighter and brings peace to your soul. 

As you sip on your wine, you move closer to him and rest your head on his shoulder. There's just something about Spencer that draws you in, almost as if he has his own gravitational pull. Like he's the sun and you're just a planet in his orbit. But you wouldn't have it any other way. Spencer puts an arm around your shoulders and hugs you closer, sending a warm feeling down your spine. If only you could stay like this forever. 

The two of you finish off the wine in a comfortable silence, and it's not too long after that you find your eyelids growing heavy. You burrow yourself closer to Spencer, who adjusts so that you two can comfortably lay on the couch together. The crackling of the fire and Spencer's warmth lulls you close to sleep, and you might have fallen asleep, had it not been for feeling Spencer pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. 

The kiss was quick, gentle, but you know he had meant it. As you lay on him, head on his chest, his arms wrap you up and hug you tight, like he's afraid you'd float away if he let you go. You feel warmness creep up into your cheeks as his hands start rubbing slow circles on your back. It's almost like he wants you to fall asleep on him. 

Before you're pulled into sleep, you look up at him through your lashes, only to be met with his warm, tender gaze already on you. Your lips fall apart as you feel the butterflies take flight in your tummy. Up close and under the soft glow of the fire, you're sure Spencer was actually an angel in human form. You had never seen such delicate beauty before. 

Unable to stop yourself, your hand travels up his torso before it rests on his cheek. Your thumb gently strokes over his cheekbone as the two of you explore each other's eyes. It's unspoken, but you feel as if there's an agreement between the two of you, an acknowledgement of sorts. 

Feeling a surge of confidence, you lean up and press your lips to his. He's warm and soft, and his hands cradle your face as if you were made of glass. Your lips move in perfect tandem, as if you had done this a million times before. 

When your lungs begin to burn, it's only then that you pull away with a heated face and swollen lips. You blink a few times as you gaze into his eyes, seeing his pupils dilated and his lips pinker than they were just a moment earlier. His hands hold your face delicately and he looks at you as if you had personally put all the stars in the sky. 

"You have no idea how long I've waited for you." He whispers before leaning in for another kiss. His words are deliberate and genuine, and you know he's not lying. 

As you break away again, a smile finds its way to your face. Spencer smiles back and it feels like things are falling perfectly into place. You wish you had the ability to bottle this moment up and preserve it. Your heart and soul had never felt such peace than when you're in Spencer's loving arms. 

You lean your forehead against his and close your eyes, knowing with every fiber of your being that Spencer Reid is the man you're going to spend the rest of your days with. 

[storiesofsvu]

Decadent Desires Ch 15

Emily Prentiss x reader Warnings: language, smut eluded to/mentioned, mainly a filler chapter taking place in the days directly following the last chapter.

Rolling over Emily felt her body sink even deeper into your mattress, the blankets cocooned perfectly around her and she felt more relaxed than she had all week. She heard the all to familiar creak of your shower tap as it turned off and she let out a quiet groan, she’d forgotten it was Monday. With a reluctantly huff she pushed herself up to sitting, starting to change out of the pyjamas you’d leant her back into the clothes she’d tossed into a spare chair.

“You could’ve stayed sleeping.” Your voice quietly broke through the room as you re-entered it, clad in only your underwear as you stepped toward your closet.

“It’s fine.” She pinched at the bridge of her nose, “I’ve got a mountain of paperwork I need to get a start on.”

“My grocery order got delayed thanks to the weather, best I can offer you is a frozen waffle.”

“Don’t worry about it.” She chuckled, “I usually grab something on the way in anyways.”

“Good.” You turned to her with a grin, “cause I’m pretty sure they’re past the best by date.”

Emily laughed, shaking her head at you, her eyes lingering on your semi naked frame longer than she had originally intended. Your phone pinged and the hanger in your hand dropped to the bed as you picked up the device, your attention fully on it as you face her. It was then Emily noticed the deep purple nearly black bruise on your thigh and she was about to make a comment about your tennis skills until her eyes focused and she realized there was a clear line of teeth marks on the outer edge. Her mind thought back to the previous evening, the band-aid on  your arm mixed with this was a clear sign you’d had some fun in Florida.

“Ugh.” You dropped your phone down on the nightstand, picking up the shirt and putting it on, “you think some people would have the decency to wait past eight a.m. to start planning a date.”

“Date?” Her brow raised in your direction and you let out a huff, stepping into a pencil skirt, quickly fixing your outfit before grabbing a pair of heels.

“Yeah. Heather needed specific support for a legislation and I got roped into going on a date with this congressman’s kid. You flirt a little and they’ll take it a whole other direction.”

She followed you down the stairs, beginning to wonder just how much fun you’d had in Florida, “that a regular occurrence?”

“Depends. Most of the time it’s only dinner or drinks with the added bragging rights of being seen together.” You shrugged, “you want a coffee to go?”

“Yeah, sure.”

It only took you a few seconds to pour her out a mug, fixing it perfectly to her liking before handing it to her.

“Thanks.” She smiled at you, her shoulders relaxing once again when you smiled right back at her.

“I’ll see you Wednesday?”

“Yeah, of course.” With another smile she turned back toward the door, collecting her coat and stepping into her shoes.

“And Emily?” You called out, poking your head around the corner.

“Yeah?”

“Don’t ever feel bad about calling or showing up, okay? I’d hate for you to be alone at home trapped with whatever haunting thoughts are running through your brain after a bad case.”

“Okay.” She laughed softly a warmth spreading through her cheeks.

“I mean it. And if you’re too dragged down or drunk to drive, I’ll knock down your door. I know it’s difficult being the boss, but you’ve gotta remember, you’re important too.”

“Thank you, really.” Stepping toward the door she pulled it open, grimacing at the view outside, “and you promise me you’re gonna drive safe, it looks like shit out here.”

“I will.”

*

Emily had been right, the roads were pretty terrible, making your commute longer and worse than you’d expected. You’d shot a text off to Heather about running late and she told you not to worry about it, she’d rather have you take your time and arrive in one piece than rush and risk something happening. You were stuck at a light you’d been waiting three rotations at already when your phone buzzed in the cupholder. Picking it up you assumed it was another text from Heather to find that it was your Venmo app, a hundred dollar payment received from Emily.

A weird sensation wormed its way into your stomach and for a moment you thought maybe you’d accidentally used spoiled milk in your coffee. The screen remained on your phone, glaring up at you in the low morning light, and you tugged your lip between your teeth as the wheels started turning in your brain. You knew what your agreement was, you’d signed and added to the contract after all, one hundred dollars for anything that was akin to a casual dinner or simple companionship. In your mind, that meant something like going out to a movie, having lunch during a relaxed weekend, running errands together so you didn’t have to do it alone. Your thumb hovered over the ‘refund’ button, it almost felt weird taking money from Emily for something like her needing comfort, she’d needed a friend or something more in that moment, not a client. Right as you were about to make an impulsive decision, the light changed and the car behind you laid on their horn, causing you to drop your phone back into the cupholder and forget about it for the time being.

Thankfully the rest of the way to the office was relatively clear and you managed to make record time, collecting your things and making your way inside. You thought it was time for a quiet morning, not a lot of people around the building, but right as you passed Heather’s office her voice called out.

“Hey!”

Freezing in your step, you winced, slowly backtracking to her door, “sorry, I did my best.”

“Sweetheart with the quality of work you do I couldn’t give a fuck if you were late.” She opened a drawer of her desk, pulling out a couple of things, “c’mere.” You almost hesitantly entered her office, crossing the space to her desk as she grinned up at you, extending a sealed envelope, “from Rob.”

“Oh, perfect.” You tucked it into your bag.

“You alright?” She asked, surveying you for a minute.

“Yeah, drive just frazzled me a little bit.”

“Okay.” She glanced down to your purse, “are you going to open that?”

“It’s basically only for my peace of mind anyways. I’ll let you know if there’s any wildly shocking results.”

“Better hope you’re not pregnant, I’m not raising another one.”

“God you are such a comedian, and at this hour of the morning. Just how do you do it?”

“Anymore sass and you’re not getting the other thing I have in here for you.”

“Oh?”

She chuckled softly, pulling out a small box from the drawer and handing it to you, “good job in Florida. You really upped your game.”

“Thank you.”

“On the contrary, I should be thanking you.”

“Isn’t that what this is?” You gestured to the gift box.

“That’s for last week.”

“Then…what are you thanking me for?”

“Keeping the appropriate kind of secrets from me at the appropriate time.” She smiled, “Now go on,” she shooed you away, “you’ve got more important things to do than stand around gossiping.”

**

Despite not calling the team in until Wednesday, Emily found herself back at the office midday Monday, working through as much as she could to make sure every report she handed off to Bailey had an excruciating amount of detail with all the I’s dotted and t’s crossed.

Tuesday she stayed stationed at her desk the entire day, working well into the evening, thanking the desk clerk for bringing up multiple rounds of take out so she wasn’t surviving on coffee alone. It was a heavy paperwork week, there were a handful of invoices still sitting in her inbox she needed to explain what were for and sign off on before sending them up the chain, payroll needed to be completed and her inventory needed to be double checked and sent off. With the team coming back in tomorrow she was hoping she could get most of it done by noon considering once their paperwork was done she needed to sign off on it before it went up the chain and there was always the chance of them catching another case. She was starting to wish she’d pushed them coming back until Thursday at this point.

Her phone buzzed on her desk and she glanced up, honestly welcome for the intrusion as she blinked her eyes a few times, pushing her glasses up onto her head as she dropped her pen, flexing her hand in an attempt to relieve the cramp. Picking up her phone she was surprised to see Heather’s name flash across the screen and she quickly swiped open the message.

‘Sorry to bother you, I know you’re likely busy as all hell but I would love to get your professional opinion on something sometime this week.’

‘Yeah, of course. What are your office hours looking like this week? I’m probably going to be swamped tomorrow but could manage to disappear for a midday so called lunch.’

‘I was thinking more along the lines of after hours. Any chance you think you could swing by my place Thursday around eight? I promise you’ll be sent home with a to go plate from dinner and a bottle of Macallan.’

‘Oh well, twist my rubber arm why don’t you.’ Emilylaughed softly, ‘send me the address again, I know you’re Chevy Chase but can’t remember much past that.’

‘You’re a gem. Thank you.’  ‘3301 Fessenden St NW’

Emily put down the phone, picking up the pen to scribble the address into her desk calendar, chewing on her thumbnail as she looked through all the notes written down. Her eyes landed on the green ink on Wednesday evening and she let out a small huff before picking up her phone again, selecting your contact.

‘Hey, I know we scheduled for Wednesday but do you think there’s any chance we can push it to the weekend, Saturday even? It’s payroll week and quarterly end and I didn’t quite realize how much I’d let pile up.’

She waited a few minutes, taking the opportunity to continue with her break, scrolling through a few apps and replying to another couple of personal text messages in the meantime before her phone buzzed once again.

‘Fucking hell I forgot about fucking payroll.’ ‘Yeah the weekend is totally fine. And don’t stress about making a reservation or anything yet, if you’re too wiped when the time comes we can just wait til next week, I won’t be offended.’

‘Alright.’ She laughed softly, ‘I’ll pencil you in for Saturday then?’

‘Sounds perfect.’

‘Why are you worrying about payroll?’

‘Heather’s PA is on vacation; I’ve been covering the more complicated duties while she’s gone.’

‘Pain the ass, hey?’

‘Absolutely. When you’re a kid you think being the boss is gonna be the coolest thing, turns out it’s all paperwork.’

‘Tell me about it.’

She let out a small laugh, placing her phone back down on the desk as she let out a small sigh and slid her glasses back on. If she was going to keep adding to her week, she better pick up right where she left off.

**

The sound of the doorbell echoed through the Dunbar household on Thursday evening and Rob was the one who got to there first, pulling it open to enthusiastically greet Emily.

“Hey, come in, come in.” He gestured, swinging the door shut behind her, “it’s been a while.”

“It really has.” She laughed softly, accepting the brief one armed hug while he offered to take her coat and she was able to toe off her snow coated shoes.

“How’s the bureau? Heat tells me you’ve moved up to Section Chief?”

“Oh, entirely too much paperwork and definitely not enough fun.”

“Sounds like you need a vacation.” He half teased before calling down the hall, “Heat, you’ve got company.”

It only took a couple of seconds before Heather had rounded a corner down the long hall, actively wiping her hands off on a dish towel as she approached them.

“Thank you so much for coming.” Leaning in she pressed a kiss to her cheek, “there’s straight liquor and wine upstairs but we’ve got mojito and negroni’s going in the kitchen if you prefer.”

“Wine is fine.” Emily assured and Heather turned to her husband, passing off the dish towel.

“Would you make sure you pack up a nice container from dinner for her, and don’t skimp! Lord knows she’s been living off small town takeout.”

“Double portions of everything, got it.” Rob replied with a small salute to his wife before disappearing down the same hall.

Heather’s hand quickly pressed on the small of Emily’s back, directing her up the stairs, “sorry it’s a bit chaotic in here tonight.” She commented, no doubt addressing the amount of noise bouncing around through the house. “You’d think two kids coming home for dinner would mean just that and maybe some laundry but Jordan’s taken over the basement entertainment system with a group of his friends, Becca’s got a mock Jeopardy battle going on to help study for winter exams and Rob’s entertaining one of the biggest hospital owners in the State.”

“Sounds like none of you Dunbar’s know how to rest.” Emily teased, following Heather into her home office.

“I would say the work ethic’s in the genes but I’m pretty sure the boys are playing Grand Theft Auto downstairs.” She turned back around, handing off a hefty glass of wine to the other woman, “how about you? Have things calmed down at all?”

“In the sense of field work, I guess. But the paperwork never stops and it’s just so dull.” She groaned, “I really don’t know how you keep up with your workload.”

“I’ve got a rather large and very talented and committed team, most of whom I raised from the ground up.”

Emily nodded, her ears picking up the sound of stilettos on the hardwood, almost like they were pacing up and down the hallway, another dinner companion that seemed to be on the phone, little hums and huffs every so often until your voice hit her ears. She could just make it out over the small talk her and Heather continued to have before diving into things. You were using a sickeningly sweet yet also a completely dominating voice that Emily had never heard before. There was a husk to it, but it also sounded like utter silk and she was practically melting, her attention drifting from Heather’s voice more than she meant it to.

You’d been approaching Heather’s office to use to finish up your private conversation but once you made it a foot from the door you realized that she had company. Trying both not to interrupt and also not be clearly overheard depending on her guest, you lingered in the doorway as you talked.

“Ohohoho..” you let out a low laugh, “come on now Frank, you know Ms. Dunbar needs this done by the end of the week, I’m sure you have even the tiniest sliver of time to squeeze us in. How about I get us a table at Palm Court? You know I’ll be sure to have the Wagyu flown in from Kagoshima, just like you like it.” You barely let a beat pass, “don’t you worry about Claire, I’ll keep her nice and busy, it’s been a while since we’ve met up and lord knows I need a fresh manicure.”

Feeling cocky enough that you’d sealed the deal you made the slow steps towards Heather’s door, keeping your voice quiet enough to not disturb her conversation.

“That’s what I thought. Thank you.”

Heather glanced up at the sound of success in your voice as you stepped into the office and small smirk overtook her lips. Emily watched as you dropped the façade, your body relaxing though you still absolute exuded power and confidence. Rather than a cute little skirt and top, she figured it was the weather that made you opt for the very form fitting pant suit, white tank blouse dipping just below your collarbone to leave enough for imagination but entice everyone, blazer likely strewn somewhere else in the house. You crossed the room, tossing Heather’s work cell down onto her desk.

“Underwood will meet you at two on Friday.”

“I—What?” It was Emily’s voice that cut in first and you glanced toward her with a grin on your cheeks.

“What?”

“You’re on first name basis with The President?”

“Part of the job.” You shrugged, “besides, his wife always has the best gossip.”

Emily practically gaped, looking between you and Heather, watching the other woman chuckle softly.

“See what I mean? She wasn’t even supposed to be here tonight, showed up to finish this deal for me because I wasn’t answering my phone.”

“Yeah…” She nodded, still a little dumbfounded by the entire thing. She knew you were well intermingled with varying levels of politicians but she hadn’t expected something of this magnitude. Then again, when her eyes surveyed over you once more, she could see the sheer amount of power just drifting off you, the only time she’d seen you in work mode before was the very first day she met you and she was starting to realize why Heather had teased her for drooling.

You cast her a smile before turning back to your boss now that she had sat behind her desk “I’ve done by due diligence tonight, but I’m finished babysitting. Becca’s gonna ace her exams, Rob’s sweeping the floor at poker, but your other kid’s an idiot, they’re daring each other to a bellyflop competition.”

“They took the cover off the pool?” Heather groaned, pinching at the bridge of her nose.

“Yeah. A hundred bucks says the hot tub’s next.”

“Jesus Christ.”

“Good thing there’s a slew of doctors in the house.” You teased and Heather rolled her eyes as you turned to Emily, squeezing at her elbow with a bright smile, “good to see you. I love that colour.” Your fingers toyed with the lapel of her blazer and a glinting in the low light caught her eye, an absolutely stunning cluster of diamonds and yellow gold on your wrist, “it looks phenomenal on you.”

“Thanks.” She smiled, her breath nearly catching in her throat as she glanced up at you and you smiled, turning back to Heather.

“You owe me, big.”

“What? Twenty three grand wasn’t enough?” She asked with a tease and you rolled your eyes as you started to make your way out of the room.

“I refuse to pawn gifts, you know that.” You called over your shoulder, “so don’t you dare make me work Christmas.”

“You don’t even celebrate the holidays.”

“Doesn’t mean I don’t like bonus time off,” you turned, resting your hand on the doorframe, bracelet sparkling, “maybe even a few days at one of the plethora of vacation bundles you have stocks in?”

“Thought you said you were done working and thus, done bothering me? Sometimes I regret giving you your own key!”

Heather raised a brow, laughing when all you did in return was flip her off and disappear from her view. Emily chuckled, finally taking a sip of her wine, though her eyes lingered on the doorway as if she could still see the diamonds glinting.

“Something catch your eye?” Heather asked with a smirk and she finally turned back to her, gently dropping into a chair.

“Uh, guess I hadn’t seen her in work mode in a while.” She admitted, feeling her cheeks heat, “didn’t realize she accessorized so well.”

“You like the bracelet?”

“Yeah, it’s stunning.”

“Harry Winston.”

“Damn.” Emily’s eyes widened, “they don’t even list the prices on the website, you’ve got to go in.”

Heather shrugged, “she worked hard for it. Florida certainly earned her a little extra winter bonus.”

“Huh…” Emily nodded, going to take another sip of her wine right as everything managed to click together like puzzle pieces. She quickly masked herself before her eyes could widen again, sucking back more wine as a distraction. A strange sensation began to twist in her lower stomach, one that she didn’t really like at all but it continued to grow as she thought about the woman across the desk from her buried between your legs.

Heather surveyed her for a moment as she took a sip of her own bourbon and she could have sworn she saw the tiniest hint of green flash through her dark eyes. Her head tilted slightly, the sudden way Emily was picking at her thumbnail was speaking pretty clearly but now she was wondering if you had shown up on purpose, flaunting the jewelry. You’d mentioned something to her earlier in the week about Emily cancelling a date, perhaps the grey haired woman wasn’t the only one with green in her eyes.

“Anway,” Heather interrupted with a huff, “I wanted to talk to you.”

“Oh, right.” Emily snapped out of it, glancing up towards her with a smile, “what’s up?”

“Have you heard of an Officer Patterson, out of DC Metro?”

“I—uh..” Emily nearly tensed, briefly remembering the very early phone call in your kitchen a few months prior, “heard of him…”

“He was the one that arrested my son.”

“You.. know about that?”

Heather chuckled, “Jordan’s an idiot, neither he nor his friends can keep a secret very long.” She sighed, “I did a look through the papers, this guy’s a prick. I thought he was just preying on the rich and somewhat famous but he does the same shit with people who can’t afford a good attorney. I want his badge.”

“Don’t you have a lot more power than I do when it comes to that kind of stuff?”

“Potentially.” She took a swig of her drink, “I just figured you might have some contacts at Metro PD who had their own stories or opinions, I know the blue doesn’t like to turn on their own but there has to be a reason this guy’s still a rookie after all these years. Thought you might be able to pull his jacket, take a look through it?”

“You really don’t let people fuck with your family, huh?” Emily asked and Heather nearly snorted.

“Jordan deserved what he got,” she laughed, “he’s damn lucky he wasn’t behind the wheel of a car. I don’t want his arrest expunged or shoved under the rug; I could have done that myself. But I do want to look into this Patterson and see what can be done about it.”

“I’ve got a couple of friends and Metro, and I can see what I can pull up from my database.”

“Thank you.” Heather smiled warmly, her eyes darting up when there was a knock on the doorframe.

“Bad news, I’ve gotta take one of Jordan’s friends in.” Rob said.

“Oh god, what now?”

“They tried to use the diving board without wiping the slush off.” He explained and Heather groaned.

“For fuck’s sake.” She drained her drink, “let me guess, slipped and broke something?”

“Ankle.” Rob replied, then glanced towards their guest, “Emily the bag on the kitchen island is for you, wouldn’t want you to forget it.”

“Oh, thank you so much.”

Rob disappeared from the doorway as Emily finished her drink, following Heather’s lead to standing and moving from the office down the stairs.

“Thank you for coming, and for now I’d like if this could be kept as off the record as possible.”

“Of course.” Emily nodded with a smile as she accepted the bag that definitely had more than one portion of food in it before finally making her way out of the house.

**

When the weekend rolled around you and Emily ended up swapping your date night over to Friday instead, and Emily was honestly glad that you did. She got a call halfway through her work day that a pipe had burst in the basement of her apartment, no water would be available for the next twenty four hours. There had been yet another surprise snowfall and even though it wasn’t that big the roads were terrible and the last thing you wanted was to drive all the way home after work.

This was why it was lucky Emily still had her standing reservation at The Waldorf.

You caught up a bit over dinner and drinks, Emily curious to know more about how often you were in close quarters with the President and First Lady. You rattled on about a couple of things, shared the stories you knew you could, flashed your fresh manicure and shared some gossip you’d gotten from Claire that afternoon. In turn Emily delved a little bit into how her week had been now that she’d finally caught up on paperwork, she had stories about the team she’d never even thought of telling you, the entire evening seeming a little more casual and open than any prior. However that didn’t change the circumstances when you got upstairs, clothes quickly falling to the floor as you dropped onto the bed and became a mess of sweaty tangled limbs.

Emily lay half wrapped around you, her head on your chest as you were propped up on the pillows, a mid nineties rom com playing on the late night television. Your hand was gently playing with her hair, soothingly scratching at her scalp as you did so.

“You okay?��� You asked, pressing a gentle kiss to her head.

“Yeah.” Her lips brushed against your collarbone before a tiny yawn escaped them, “it’s just been a long week.”

“Want me to dig into Bailey or anyone?”

“No.” She laughed, “I mean, yeah he’s being a total ass about the last case, but it’ll blow over.”

“Okay.” Your hand trailed up and down her back softly before returning to play with her hair.

“Thank you though.”

“Anytime.” You replied, leaving another kiss on the top of her head.

The next morning you were gone before she woke up, you’d warned her about that the night before, you had brunch plans with Tony and if you bailed on them again you had no doubt he would track your location and show up wherever you were. It did give her the chance to sleep in far later than she thought she would, it was almost noon by the time her eyes opened. She wasn’t used to that, usually have to set an alarm in hotels to make sure housekeeping wasn’t trying to kick her out already.

She ordered room service for breakfast, including a couple of extra meals for the rest of the day and took a very long, luxurious shower. Picking at the leftovers of her first meal while she was wrapped in the cozy warm hotel robe she let the tv play some mindless shows for a couple of hours before she finally gained the energy to start the trek home.

Downstairs she passed off her valet ticket at the concierge and started to flip through some brochures and ads while she waited.

“Anything I can help you with ma’am?” A clerk asked her.

“Uh…” her eyes lingered on the resort in Monarch Beach, the wheels turning in her brain, though that location would be far too chilly to really enjoy this time of year. “You guys have properties all around the world, right?”

“We sure do.” They replied with a bright smile, turning to grab a couple of binders, “thinking about a last minute Christmas getaway? We’ve got quite a few resorts that specialize in the festivities, lots of stuff for the family and kids to take part in.”

“Oh, no.” She shook her head, “not Christmas, definitely no kids, but definitely somewhere warm. Probably tropical, super fancy… a little exclusive… you got anything like that?”

They grinned across at her, pulling out a smaller binder, “I think you’ll find our private resort in the Maldives right up your alley.”

____________________

@mickey-gomez @momlifebehard @daddy-heather-dunbar @maybe-a-humanbean @rustyzebra @leftoverenvy @kades95 @dextur @supercriminalbean @emilyprentisssluvr @lex13cm @zizzlekwum @emobabeyy @riveramorylunar @scorpsik @onmykneesformarvel @inlovewithemilyprentiss @regalmilfs4me @ara-a-bird @inlovewithmiddleagewomen @kmc1989 @irishavengersassemble @hopedoesntknow @venromanova @waitaminuteashh @noahrex @imlike-so-gaydude @wittygutsy @cx-emerald-cx @momily @nilaues @borinxnovak @Soverign @v3nusxsky @mccdreamys-writes @l4yne @obsessedwjill @scarletwitcher97 @asolitaryrose3 @lisqueen @mrs-prentiss @whitewinewithice @d33pd3sire-blog @daffodil-heart @maximoffcarter @i-lovefandom @chimnlex @moonlightjxuregui @chestnutninny @gamma-rae-bursts @just-moondust @idkifimasub @gaydragonwitch @dowsedwithbleach @divergentalwaysandforever-blog

[honey-flustered]

Kinktober Day 18: Aphrodisiac + Oral Fixation + Body Hair

Eddie Brock | Venom x Ex!Younger!F!Reader

Summary: Venom uses honey from your purse to whip up some tea for you and Eddie while helping you study. Little did he know, that honey has some…interesting side effects.

Warnings: dub con elements, exes to friends to lovers, accidental aphrodisiac, sub!eddie x horny!reader, consumption, teratophillia, not lore accurate, oral fixation (licking, biting), some scratching, oral through underwear, premature ejaculation, body hair kink, some hair pulling, threeway kiss, venom and reader are in cahoots, french kissing, some dry humping, age gap +18 reader, bimbo!reader, basically whole lot of tongue action

To this day, 7 months later, Venom still curses Eddie for letting you go. Blah, blah…she’s young and going to university…blah blah…new experiences. If long distance is really that hard, why is it that it only took Eddie 3 hours to drive to your dorm? If he was committed to your throupling, he’d make the commute everyday to see you.

But Ole Venom supposes he shouldn’t be too hard on Eddie. After all, he’s attentive enough to Venom where he notices his changes in mood. Especially when Venom’s in one of those depressive states where he desperately misses you; with the occasional breaking of items to cope with his pained feelings. Whenever he’d get this way, Eddie would take them up go a trip to you and you’d be the three musketeers.

This weekend being a three-day weekend excited Venom for things he had in store. He’s determined to win you back even in spite of what Eddie says because sometimes he just needs a push in the right direction.

Venom likes to think he’s become that of an expert at romance, having read enough gossip magazines and advice columns to say as such. He knows the love languages and he’ll be sure to use his tongue precisely for speaking them to you.

Yeah, he knows Eddie’s been suspicious of his saint behavior since their arrival—the rules were clear not to make any plans of winning you back—but Venom’s entitled to a little bit of rule-breaking. He hovers around, content as he watches Eddie and you laughing during your study session. If he sets the mood just right, things would get more intimate.

He then recalls a fact he’d gotten from an issue of Chic Heat Magazine that explains how tea can make people more susceptible to suggestion because it calms you. If you’re relaxed enough, you might take them back.

So he excuses himself to the kitchen, preparing some rose tea for you all to enjoy. You’d just run out of honey but you had some packets he’d noticed in your bag earlier, hopefully you don’t mind.

Once he returns to the circle, you beam at his gesture. “V…you are such a cutie. Thank you so much.”

“I wouldn’t say that too soon,” Eddie says in a tone that is both jest and serious. “We’ll check the state of the kitchen in a minute.”

You shrug. “No worse than the state I left it in.”

“You’ve gotta be more responsible, babygirl.” He frustratedly sighs.

“I’m studying. That’s pretty big for me,” You defend. “Usually I’d just flirt with the T.A. for the test answers or cram the day of. But I’ve been trying because you said I could do it.”

“You’re right. I’m sorry. Really proud of you, buddy.” He says, patting your knee and earning a smile from you.

Then, you’re taking a sip of your tea wanting to give Venom the praise he deserves. Your eyes brighten soon as the first sip stains your tongue and goes down your throat . “This is really good, V. Seriously. I couldn’t have done this better myself. What’d you put in it?”

“Honey…” He begins.

“Oh, I could’ve sworn I ran out—”

“…the ones in your purse.” He finishes.

Your eyes nearly leave your skull. “H-how many?”

“5,” He answers proudly. “Wanted to make it extra special for you.”

“Oh, it’s extra special alright.” You say with a nervous laugh.

“Everything okay?” Eddie asks in concern.

“Mhm,” You hum between a strained toothless smile. “L-let’s go back to studying, yeah?”

“What’s in those things?” Eddie questions, his investigative nature getting the better of him.

“Nothing to be concerned about…” Your words escape you when you see that Venom has already retrieved the emptied packet for Eddie to review.

“Sweet Honey Rush? You said you wouldn’t intern with these guys,” Eddie says. “Didn’t you read my story on them secretly being behind these campaigns for increasing the national birth rate. I sent you a link on Facebook. We’re like breeding stock to them.”

“No person younger than 35 uses facebook anymore, Eddie,” You argue. “And besides they were offering some really good benefits if I interned with them.”

“Like getting free honey packets?”

“They aren’t for me…they’re for me to give out to some college students. It’s the new craze. Everyone’s talking about. There’s even a challenge of it on TikTok. You wanna see?” You’re about to pull out your phone but he stops you.

“Don’t you see that they’re purposely targeting the younger population?” Eddie scoffs.

“No, I think I gave one to my pervy old maintenance man,” You justify but Eddie shakes his head in disbelief at you. “Oh come on. It’s not like they’re as good as you think them to be. Venom said he’s added five and you don’t see me on all fours with my tongue out, do you?”

“I guess you’re right.” He says.

“Good. Now pretty please read me the next chapter.”

He smiles. “Of course.”

Venom is stumped. This is not at all going the way he’d planned. Instead of relaxing, it’s only made things more tense between the two of you. He was going to need to intervene internally.

“It’s taking effect.” Venom says from within.

“How are you so sure?” Eddie answers back into the mindscape.

“Come on, Eddie, I know it’s been months. But tell me you haven’t forgotten the way she looks when she really, really wants you,” Venom purrs. “Look at those eyes glossing over, darkening when she rakes them over you. She’s biting her lip—ha! She isn’t paying attention to your words.”

“You’re wrong. It’s nothing like that.” Eddie says trying to maintain focus by reading to you.

“I’ve been inside her once,” Venom continues. “I can sense the changes in her body even long after we’ve separated.”

“She’s just fine.” Eddie says in clear denial.

“Then ask her if she heard what you just said. Better yet ask her anything, she’ll probably say ‘yes’ to it all if it meant having our cock inside her.” Venom chuckles wickedly.

He’s reluctant, not wanting to embarrass you, but Eddie tests Venom’s theory anyway in hopes to quell his curiosity. Why on Earth would you want them back when you had so many different options at college? The sooner Eddie could disprove his claims, the sooner they can put aside that hopeful part of them that thinks the relationship could work.

“Hey, um, by any chance do you wanna share a jar of olives together?” He asks.

“Yes.” You sigh dreamily.

He perplexedly blinks at your reply to his absurd question. You hated olives.

“Babygirl, are you paying attention?” He asks.

“Mhm.” You nod still looking at him as if he hung up the stars. And now that Venom pointed it out, Eddie, too, could see your telltale sign in just the way you clenched your thigh together alone.

“Oh, really,” He asks, cupping a hand under your chin; his fingertips dimpling your cheeks. “What did I just read to you?”

“The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell?”

“We’re studying American History, angel.” He smirks.

“Sorry, daddy,” You say, taking them completely off guard. Eddie hates how he instantly hardens at thought as if he’d taken the aphrodisiac, too. “Can I make it up to you? Taste you.”

“Yes!” Venom says.

“No,” Eddie protests. “You’re not in the right state of mind, missy. You’re going to bed, if you decide to take care of yourself on your own that’s your choice. In the morning if you still feel like you want to, then we can—”

“It’s only an aphrodisiac, dude. Not a drug. I’m not out of my mind for wanting you inside me. Both of you.”

“We’re in!” Venom says ready to reach out for you but Eddie smacks his dark tendril from your reach.

“No, we’re—” Eddie’s cut off by your lips on his. Somehow, Venom was able to sneak his mischievous tentacles around and bring your heads together.

You immediately get to work french kissing him passionately and tugging the hair on the back of his neck. His beard burns your face from the rough friction of the make-out session but it doesn’t deter you from being more forceful.

Venom’s tongue joins into the entanglement flicking and gliding between you and Eddie’s tongues, gathering a mixture of your salivas.

When Eddie breaks the kiss, you’re at his thick neck licking and biting away while Venom’s eager tongue, slithered and constricted around your body like vines.

“Stop. You don’t…” Eddie’s interrupted by yet another one of your lingering wanton kisses, finishing his sentence once you break apart. “��want this.”

“I’ve never stopped wanting you,” You suck on the space connect jaw and his neck before dragging your teeth along the vein. “Please fuck me.”

Eddie’s still too afraid to answer, cradling the back of your head while your lips and tongue continue their assault on his body.

“Fuck, babygirl,” He groans, missing this feeling of you devouring him as if he were a buffet. You and Venom were always big tongue enthusiasts wanting to put your mouths around anything that attracted you including Eddie.

His eyes flutter shut and you crawl into his lap, grinding your hips down while you tasted what you could. You pay special attention to his plump lips, licking and biting them.

“Can I go further?” You ask him.

“You heard Venom—”

“What do you want?”

“I want you.”

At his admission you moan, not being able to take it anymore. You and Venom work in sync. He begins to remove Eddie’s clothes while each sink that’s exposed you go over it with your tongue.

Eddie’s really hairy so occasionally your tongue would run over a patch of hair and you’d give it special attention.

“Fuck, I think I might actually cum from this alone,” He laughs bashfully, surprising himself. “I’m so sensitive for some reason.”

You dip your tongue into his belly-button, swirling it around before your tongue finally trails down to his throbbing bulge. It jumps in his khaki shorts the moment you place your tongue’s pressure directly on it. He shudders, his fingers through your hair.

The feverish heat of the effects take over you just as you pass the first barrier, bringing his pants down around his ankles. Venom lifts you by the waist for a moment, adding a pillow underneath for your knees. You run your fingers along the underside of his tentacles—where it’s most sensitive for him—as a thank you.

You’re not gentle at all once you spot the wet spot on Eddie’s underwear. He’d cum already and had been too ashamed to speak up. He could already see you making an old man joke about him needing the honey packet more than you but instead you went for his soul.

Immediately, you clamp your mouth around the clothed tip to suck at the sticky essence. It’s so sensitive he could cry, it’s as if the aphrodisiac is giving him a contact high.

He tries to pull your hungry mouth from him but is thwarted when Venom wraps a snaky limb around his wrists, pinning him down.

“Oh god, fuck. Baby…please.” Eddie whimpers.

You drag your nails along his little belly, gripping and pulling the tiny hairs of his happy trail while you sucked him off. Another one of Venom’s tendrils finds their way between your legs, teasing your little nub. You let out a shuddery gasp, your warm breath skirting over his now exposed veiny length.

You trace your tongue on the lightning-patterned cock, tasting the addictive earthiness of him. You’re gushing wet and ready to their cock and Venom could very well slip a wriggling tendril inside of you this instant…

…but he’d rather Eddie get first dibs.

[justmystyles]

I need some angst with happy ending please. Am a sucker for angst and jelly harry or yn

Veiled Insecurities

read my other work here!

pairing: Harry Styles x plus size reader

word count: 1.7k

summary: Harry has some insecurities about your relationship, but instead of talking to you about them, they end up coming out in the wrong way.

warnings: a couple of curse words, but other than that, it's tame.

a/n: thank you so much for this ask! i don't know where this idea came from, but it was a lot of fun to work through. including yelling at myself for an entire commute home trying to work out dialogue. my apologies to anyone that happened to be stuck in traffic next to me on the highway friday night. 😂

tags: @allthelovehes @ameerakane20 @ash-craze @bethanysnow @blue-ballad @blueraspberryreader @brightlightsinlife @creativelyeva @cute-as-ducks420 @deannaard @fanficismydrug @gem1712 @golden-hoax @gothmingguk @groovychaosavenue @hillzrry @iceebabies @indierockgirrl @jerseygirlinca @jng4kook @jooniesbabie @kaverichauhan @laurxn-robinson @lexiecamposv @mrs-anna-styles211994 @n0vaj3an @potterheadandsherlocked @rach2699 @ravenclawdirectioner @stylesfeverr @superchrystaldrug @tenaciousperfectionunknown @tiaamberxx @thechaoticjoy @theekyliepage @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @youknowwhaaat

The air in the car was thick with tension as you kept your eyes locked on the passing scenery, refusing to give Harry the satisfaction of glancing over at him. Neither of you had spoken a word, you were waiting for an apology. You had no idea what he could possibly be waiting for. 

Harry pulled the car into the driveway, and you hopped out before he even had a chance to put it in park, slamming the door behind you.

“You didn’t let me get your door,” he commented as you made your way to the house. 

You turned to him, rage burning in your eyes. “You haven’t been a gentleman all day. Why start now?” 

He winces slightly at the heart wrenching combination of your words, and the disdain they were spoken with. 

Today was the day of your company picnic, and Harry was actually going to be in town and was excited to go with you. He had heard so many stories about your job, and your coworkers, that he was looking forward to putting faces to all the names. One face in particular changed all of that. 

The department you worked in was small, only about five or six coworkers and your boss. While you all worked closely together, your job was particularly intertwined with your coworker, Roger. You had told Harry about Roger before, his existence wasn’t a surprise to him. What was a surprise were his good looks, and how close the two of you were.

He had heard the term ‘work husband’ before, but he had never heard it more than he did at that picnic, and everyone that used it had been referring to you and Roger. He knew it was a platonic thing, that it didn’t mean anything, and he was glad that you had a support system at work. But that combined with the slight touches throughout the day had Harry seeing red. 

You had noticed a shift in Harry shortly after Roger’s arrival, and it just kept getting worse, coming to a crescendo after you and Roger won the three legged race. You were so embarrassed by his behavior that you made some excuse about your limited time with Harry and left early. Much earlier than you had wanted. 

Harry knew you well enough to know you were upset, so he didn’t say anything on the ride home. He knew you’d want to collect your thoughts before talking, he would let you start the conversation. And you decided to do so as soon as you were in the house.

“What the actual fuck, Harry?” You spat, finally meeting his gaze. 

“Princ-”

“No,” you interrupted. “No pet names.”

Harry pinched the bridge of his nose with a deep sigh. “Y/N, I think you’re overreacting.” 

Your eyes went wide. “Are you kidding? I’ve never seen you so rude before!”

“Only to him,” Harry mumbled. “I was fine with everyone else.” 

“And there it is!” You throw your hands out in frustration. “Please tell me what is so wrong about my closest work friend.”

“Don’t you mean your work husband?” He snapped back.

“Oh my god, Harry. Seriously? You have like four work husbands!” 

“Maybe,” he started. “But they aren’t all over me like he was with you!”

Your eyes went wide at his accusation. “No shit, because you’re all over them!” You run your hand down your face, trying to keep your composure. “Harry, you are the most physically affectionate person I have ever met, it’s one of the things I love about you. It also makes it incredibly hypocritical of you to have an issue with other people doing it on a significantly smaller scale.”

“But you’re my girlfriend, I didn’t like seeing another man’s hands on you.” 

You stared at him in disbelief. “Who are you? This is not you. You’re not possessive like this.” 

“I thought you liked when I was possessive of you?” He asked with an arched brow, trying to diffuse the situation. 

“When we’re alone, and in the heat of the moment? Absolutely. But when you’re like that around other people, you come off as a toxic asshole.” A quick flicker of sadness flashed across your face. You hoped Harry didn’t notice. “Roger was excited to meet you, he’s heard so much about you.” You crossed your arms over your chest. “Because I love you and I talk about you all the time.” 

“Okay, well I just don’t think it’s very professional for him to be so flirty with you.” Harry shrugged. 

You buried your face in your hands and took a deep breath. “You want to talk about professionalism? Part of your job is literally your sex appeal. You have women throwing themselves at you on a regular basis. You’re basically one step above stripper the way you dress and dance around on stage.”

He opened his mouth to respond, but you held up your hand as you continued on. “Every fan hug that lingers a little longer than it should, every girl that calls you daddy, or tries to shoot their shot with you at a show, every bra thrown in your face; I take it all in stride and I don’t let it get to me. Do you want to know why? Because I love you, and I trust you completely. I know you would never do anything. It absolutely breaks my heart that you think so little of me and my commitment to you that you don’t extend me the same courtesy.” Before he could fully process your words, you turned your back to him and stormed away, slamming the door to your bedroom shut. 

The tears had barely begun to fall before Harry was knocking on the door. “Y/N?”

“Go away, Harry.” You couldn’t help the waiver in your voice. 

You prayed that Harry didn’t hear it, but he did. And it felt as though his heart had shattered, he had made you cry. He had made you cry, and you were trying to hide it from him. He knew that you would often mask your pain as anger, not wanting to give people the satisfaction of seeing your tears. Because of his actions, you had put up a wall with him. You didn’t want to be vulnerable, and it was his own fault. He couldn’t blame you, this whole thing had blown so far out of proportion and he needed to make it right. 

He opened the bedroom door and entered slowly. You were sitting on the side of the bed, elbows on knees, you looked over to Harry, and his breath hitched. Your cheeks were already tearstained, your eyes red-rimmed. 

“Y/N,” he said softly, taking a seat beside you and raising his arms. Before he could get them around you, you slid out of his reach. He looked up at you with pain in his eyes. 

“No,” you said sternly. “You don’t get to do that. You don’t get to comfort me right now. You’re the reason this happened, you don’t get to ride in here on your white horse and hold me and tell me it’s going to be okay.” 

He nodded silently and looked down at the floor. “I do trust you,” Harry finally broke the awkward silence. “This was never about me not trusting you. I know that you love me, and I trust you implicitly.” He turned his head to look at you. “It’s not even about not trusting Roger. I just…” He let out a deep breath. “I saw how close the two of you are, and it reminded me that you have this whole life that I’m just on the outside of because I’m always away.” 

He turned, sitting with his legs crossed on the bed so that he could face you. “I wasn’t jealous because I thought he was going to try something, I was jealous because he gets to see you everyday, because you two have a closeness that I’m afraid you and I can’t have.” 

You finally look up at Harry, the frustration in his eyes now replaced with concern. “Harry,” you turned, mirroring the way he was sitting. “I’m closer to you than I’ve ever been with anyone.” 

“I know, I believe that. And it means the world to me.” He reached out tentatively to take your hand. Letting out a relieved breath when you didn’t pull away. “You’ve been so incredible, you’ve completely thrown yourself into my world. My family loves you, you’re practically a member of the tour staff. I want to be that for you, but I’m never able to be here long enough.” 

“Why haven’t you ever told me this before?” You squeezed his hand gently. 

He lifted your joined hands to his lips. “I guess I never really realized how much it bothered me until today.” 

“Well first of all,” you started. “The tour isn’t going to last forever. It’s going to end, and then you’ll have some time off. I would like to think that you’ll come and spend some of that time with me.” 

“Definitely,” he agreed. “As much as I can.”

“So that’s when you’ll be able to mix in with my life more.” You explained. ���We just have to take turns being in each other’s lives. Right now, you’re all over the world, so I have to make a little more of an effort to meet you halfway. When you’re on break, it will be your turn. By the time you go back on the road, or whatever you do next, it will be more of an even playing field. It just seems imbalanced now because we haven’t had time to even it out.” 

“I’m so sorry, angel.” He apologized. “Are we okay?” 

“We’re okay,” you nodded. “But next time, if you’re feeling insecure, just pull me aside and talk to me.” You sat up on your knees, wrapping your arms around his neck. “I love you, Harry.” 

“I love you too,” he replied, burying his face in your neck. “Princess?” You hummed in reply as you ran your fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. “Do you really think I’m one step above stripper?” 

You chuckled, pulling back to look him in the eyes. “Maybe two.” 

[joeydoeeyes]

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ J's Lullaby 🧸 ༊*·˚

Bf!Joe x reader

When you can't sleep, Joe is always there to come to your aid ꒰🛏꒱ wc; 1.1k

Warnings: None

You truly felt that you were beginning to go insane, laying between your white bedsheets. The hours had slowly slipped away from you, and you were still wide awake. One in the morning, two in the morning, three in the morning, four in the morning… the clock now reading 5:38 in the morning. Joe was going to be up in a few hours, and you were still here tossing and turning.

At times like these, you never failed to feel envious of Joe. The sound that his head hit the pillow, he was fast asleep, peacefully dozing like he didn’t have a care in the world. You could hear him snoring gently next to you, and while part of you was glad that at least someone was sleeping, part of your exhausted brain wanted to turn around and punch him in the face, it felt so unfair that he got to sleep when you felt so miserable.

The sound of bird song and the world slowly beginning to wake up began to fill the bedroom through the open window that was blowing the morning breeze in. Drivers making their first deliveries of the day, the early birds making the morning commute, buses passing on the street outside, but it only made you feel worse about being awake.

Everything was driving you up the wall, you felt like just tearing your hair out. You slumped back down against the bed, turning to face away from Joe this time, instead facing the white wall with the framed photo of you and Joe at his parents last Christmas, both of you very tipsy. No amount of holding it in could stop the lump you were beginning to feel forming in your throat, a physical manifestation of your frustration and anger at the world, at your brain, and yourself.

Before you could stop yourself, you felt the salty tears welling in your eyes and beginning to trail down your cheeks. You felt defeated and pathetic, wiping your eyes against your sleeves, soaking through the grey sleeves of the jumper than you’d stolen off Joe, turning the light grey dark. What you were even crying about, you didn’t know, if it was out of frustration, sleep deprivation, if you were angry, sad, mad, you couldn’t place your finger on a reason so your fingers wiped your tears instead.

You desperately tried to stop yourself from sobbing, but it was no use. Still in the middle of your tears, that was when you felt Joe’s big arms wrapping around your waist, beginning to pull you into him. You managed to turn over in bed to face him, so your chest was to his chest. He was wearing his white tank top, so his bare arms were against you. He had clearly just woken up, and he rubbed his eyes to adjust to being awake. “What’s wrong, my angel?” He asks, his voice low and rumbly in his chest.

As much as you tried, you couldn’t find an answer for him, instead just burying your head into his soft chest, clinging onto him like a lifebuoy in a storm, feeling his warmth radiating against you, his scent surrounding you. Joe let out a gentle ‘aww’ sound under his breath, as he tightened his arms around you, stroking your hair gently like he was petting a cat.

“Oh… oh, my darling,” Joe cooed to you gently, his hand continuing to stroke your hair as his other hand moved to rub your back soothingly. “Shush… shush… it’s alright,” He whispers softly. “I’m here,” He whispers, the sound of his shushing reverberating from his chest, relaxing you instantly, listening to the deep vibration of his voice as you were pressed so closely against him.

“I’ve got you. I’m here now… it’s okay, my love, I’m here. Not gonna let my baby go,” Joe assures you again, kissing your forehead delicately as he encases you within his arms, until you can’t see, hear, or think about anything other than him, him, him. Those deep, kind brown eyes look into yours with his expression soft and full of fondness for you, a face you think you could look at forever and die happy. 

“I-I… I… I just can’t fucking-,” You begin to stutter out, unable to find your words to express your frustration, before he shushes you again, wrapping the covers and blankets around you like he was swaddling a baby. “I know, baby. I know. You can’t sleep. You don’t need to tell me, I know,” Joe assured you.

He knows. Joe always fucking knows.

Admittedly, this wasn’t the first time that Joe had woken up to you being wide awake, and frustrated with yourself that you couldn’t sleep. He kissed your forehead again, as your head moved closer to the left side of his chest, and you could feel his heartbeat through his white tank top. The rhythmic sound soothed your tired head, giving you a constant sound to listen to, to focus on rather than your rapid thoughts, and you shut your eyes to zero in on it.

“There we go, love. That’s it. You can just focus on the sound of my heartbeat, yeah? Just focus on that sound, and fall asleep for me. I’m not going to let you go, my darling,” Joe whispers gently, as he cradles you in his arms like he was rocking a baby back to sleep.

You’ve finally found the most comfort that you’ve found all night, allowing every other thought to drip out of your mind, until all you can focus on is him. The feeling of his soft bare chest against you, the soft fabric of his tank top, the feeling of his stubble against your skin as he rests his chin on your forehead, the sound of his heartbeat, the warmth of his skin, the feeling of his stomach moving up and down under you, the soft sound of his breathing.

Finally, you could feel that you were beginning to fall asleep, all the noise in your brain finally beginning to fade out into nothing. Joe looks down at you with a soft expression, seeing that you were finally drifting off for him. He took pride in that, whenever he could take care of you, in any way he could, especially when he saw you so peaceful in his arms. He could feel himself getting sleepy too, letting his head relax against the pillow once more.

“Sweet dreams, my love,” He whispered, before letting his own eyes close, as the both of you finally began to drift off.

A/N: I hope you all enjoy my first fic, just a quick little blurb from my insomniac self 🤭

taglist: @ceriseheaven (comment to be added <3)

[liliansun]

I got you and you got me - L. Donhyuck

synopsis: forgetting the paperwork you needed for the meeting, your current boss has some new information to share with you and seeing how you were already late, today couldn’t get much worse, could it?

pairing: ceo!haechan + secretary!fem reader ft. dreamies, johnny (127) and my best friend 🫶

warnings: 18+ minors dni. smut, angst, swearing, slight fluff?, oral (fem receiving), fingering (fem receiving), creaming (use protection kids!), pet names (baby is used), hyuck is kinda a douche at some point, hyuck is cocky in the beginning

wc: 13k

a/n: this is like the second time I’ve ever written smut so please 🤡 do not come for me I tried my best also shout out to ash for the line she suggested <3

“Did you hear about the new ceo transfer?” A thump echoes throughout your apartment as a result of you falling over on your bedroom floor while trying to zip up your pants and put on your left heel. “Ouch—how could I not? It’s all anyone has been talking about.” With a huff, you push yourself off the floor just enough to get on your hands and crawl around searching for the shoe you’re missing. “I heard he’s cute, like really cute.” Rolling your eyes, you decide to ignore the giddy tone in her voice.

Your best friend was one of observation, she always was the first to find out who was doing who and what was going on around her—especially in the office. “As cute as that new intern you’ve been eyeing?” You can hear the slight disrespect in her scoff as she pushes herself back from her desk. “Actually no, no one can be as cute as Jaemin from the seventh floor, but if you’re asking me, his little friend Mark is equally as cute as Jaemin.” 

“I thought we were talking—ouch—about the ceo?” You were trying to reach underneath your bed, the space between the floor and the railing wasn’t big enough for your head to fit which ended in your cheek and temple being pressed against the cold metal; still wasn’t a very comfortable position to be in. “Oh yeah, Haechan, he’s quite a card. So far all the girls on the floor are gushing about how badly they want him in bed.” Finally reaching the heel you’ve been clawing at for what felt like hours, you pull it from underneath the bed and lean back on your knees with a victorious smile. “Yes, finally!” She giggles, typing away on her keyboard vigorously as she assumes you got whatever you were so desperately looking for. “I hate to interrupt this moment of triumph, but aren’t you late?” 

“Oh shit, fuck—save me a coffee!” Scurrying off the floor in an attempt to get the necessities to leave as soon as possible, you fail to realize the manila envelope laying dormant on your desk by the window. Joy, the best friend who was just keeping you company as you fail to get yourself together, per usual, hangs up the line knowing that you’d probably forget she was still there while you run around your apartment. Today didn’t seem like it was going to be a good one. 

For starters, you woke up late and nearly broke a bone or two trying to get ready when Joy called you making sure you were still alive. Then, you forgot the most important piece of your day carelessly back at your apartment which, unbeknownst to you at this moment, is going to bite you in the ass. All the taxi’s in your area seem to think you’re invisible for some reason because despite how hard you’re flagging them down, they drive past you like the dreams you once had. 

Deciding to take the train before you’re ultimately fired, you nearly miss the last one for the hour going in the direction you need and when you do finally get on, you’re squished between a big guy who looks like he eats people your size and a literal child who doesn’t look too pleased to be next to you. Thankfully the commute to work isn’t long and you’re off the bus and running through the subway to try and have enough time to salvage your job. Where you grew up and ultimately the background you came from was always strict on being punctual. You were hardly ever late and that was something you took pride in. You always tried to have enough time to make sure you were somewhat decent looking, had everything you needed and even if you weren’t mentally prepared, at least you looked like you were and that was good enough for you. 

So when you’re rushing into the multi-story building that holds about as many employees as you get on your paycheck, you’re definitely getting some looks of concern while you’re running and almost tripping towards the elevator. Impatiently tapping your foot on the floor while waiting for the elevator, you feel a presence coming you way and you’re just hoping it’s no one you know that’ll try and start a conversation with you. “Got somewhere to be?” The voice beside you wasn’t one you were familiar with, his soft yet deep tone was one you were sure you’d remember if you heard it before. “Uh, yeah, I’m kinda a little late.” Flicking your wrist, your watch falls forward, revealing the time and how you’re more than just a little late.

“Rough morning?” Turning your head back to him, you meekly nod before avoiding awkward eye contact. “Yeah, I didn’t sleep well I guess, but the CEO can be a dick so I’m in a rush.” As the elevator dings, people come stepping out as you try and maneuver yourself into the elevator. The guy who was trying to keep up small talk snickers to himself as he pinches the bridge of his nose. “Are you getting in or what?” Somewhat composing himself, he straightens his back and tugs down on the edge of his blazer. “Top floor, please.” As he steps in, you click on his floor as requested and the floor you work on. “So tell me, what about the CEO makes him such a dick?” 

Closing your eyes to take in a deep breath, you weren’t feeling the best to keep feeding into his questions. “Look, I don’t wanna sound rude or anything, but I don’t know you and seeing how I’m already late, can you please just stop talking?” The look on his face isn’t one you can read easily and that somewhat makes you nervous. He almost looks displeased with your reaction, yet amused by how you shut down the conversation. The way he pushes his tongue into his cheek has you trying harder to pick apart what’s going on in his head. The ding of the elevator pulls you from your thoughts and you pull your eyes from his unreadable expression and forward as you’re back to rushing away through the office floor. 

Your first stop is to Joy’s office, double checking with her to see if the CEO started his meeting yet or if you still had time to breathe before being ridiculed for everything you did. Joy was one of the top people who ran the social media aspect for the company. Between her and a couple of other people, they all made sure to handle the media that’s put out about the company, the social media accounts looked good and stayed coherent and most importantly, ran the website. Of course they had employees underneath them that helped them do their job best, but the new intern is surely giving her a run for her money. 

A soft few knocks were delivered on her door before you peaked your head in to look around and make sure everyone had their clothes on still. She’s sitting at her desk, brows furrowed as she’s focused in on whatever she’s doing and the bun in her hair resting high despite a few strands that have fallen down onto her face. When you fully step in is when she looks up from the screen and an instant smile is spread across her face. “Look who decided to show up for work.” Rolling your eyes with a mirroring smile, you close the door behind you and walk around to one of the seats she has set up for when she needs leisure time over business. “Oh shut up, I damn near died coming into this building today and I don’t think I get paid enough to cover the funeral expenses.” 

Pushing her chair back, she walks around from behind her and joins you in the chairs adjacent from where she was just sitting. “I’d cover the rest, of course, unless I’m too busy planning my wedding with Jaemin.” Snickering, you lean forward to slap her on the knee. “You’ve had him here for what, two weeks at best, and you’re already planning a wedding?” Laughing equally, if not harder than you, she leans back in the chair and merely shrugs with crossed arms. “Who knows, he visits me often and I can’t tell if he’s trying to suck up to me or if he’s really just that desperate for this job.” Tapping your chin, you look off at the wall where pictures of you two and a few other friends decorate her office. “Hmm, maybe both.” Gasping, she grabs a pillow from the seat beside her and flings it across to hit you on the chest. 

“I can’t believe you said that, for that I hope the new CEO eats your ass alive.” Oh yeah, you forgot that’s why you came to her office in the beginning. “Speaking of new CEO, is the meeting starting yet or do I still have time to live?” As if the realization of the envelope left in your apartment was a wall made out of bricks, you’d be ultimately crushed and probably left with no chance of survival once it hit you that you left it behind. “Oh my gosh, I completely forgot the papers for today’s meeting.” Covering your face, you groan as loudly as the position you were in allowed. “I can’t save you on this one, that’s department crossing and I don’t feel like losing my job today.” With an apologetic smile, she reaches over and rubs your arm as you mentally prepare yourself for being chewed out later on. 

A couple knocks on her door pulls you both from your shared moment over your downward spiral. “Miss Joy, Miss y/n, I was told to come let Miss y/n know that the meeting is to start soon and she’s needed.” Both you and Joy look over to the boy who merely peaked his head through the crack of the door. “Thank you Jaemin.” Her tone was overly sweet as she locks gazes with him before he leaves her sight. “Duty calls, I guess.” Groaning as you push yourself up and out of the chair, she does the same and waits for you to pass her before following behind you. “Good luck out there soldier, you’re gonna need it.” With a heavy sigh, you nod and open your arms to take her in for a hug. She steps in, pulling you against her to engulf you in her embrace. The soft hint of vanilla and cinnamon fill you nostrils as you rest your chin atop of her shoulder. “You’re going to do great.” She mumbles against your hair while rubbing you back with encouragement. Pulling back from the hug, both of your arms slide down one anothers till you’re holding each others hands.

Giving them a gentle squeeze, she gives you one final reassuring smile before you slip through the entrance of her door and make your way back to the elevators. “Miss Joy wanted me to give you this Miss y/n.” Jaemin, the intern your beloved friend has been eyeing since the moment he first stepped into this building for his interview, met you at the door with a cup in his hand that had your signature drink printed on the order sticker. “Thank you, Jaemin.” Smiling knowingly at him, you take the cup from his hand and enter the elevator with the worry that your fatal mistake from this morning will cost you your job. Now you might be wondering, what even is your job? Unlike Joy who has her own office and obviously gets paid more than you, you work for the CEO directly. In layman's terms, you’re his secretary. Everything he emails you, you do the dirty work of digging into and finding out everything and anything there is to know about it. Upcoming rivalry company? He’ll send you the name of their CEO and that alone is enough for you to dig into them and tell him if they are a threat or not along with other useful information he might need to know.

Usually, he’ll tell you if he wants something printed off or not and you’ll grab it and bring it into his office, seeing how your desk is right in front of it. It’s easy for some to confuse you with his assistant, that poor girl has it harder than you, and you’re almost glad that you aren’t in the position she’s in. That’s why you’re scared shitless due to the important paperwork you left behind at home, and I know what you’re thinking, why can’t you just print off the papers once you get to your desk? Well, your CEO thought it would be a good idea to send to your personal email instead of the work email you use on this computer in case of any suspicious activity that might’ve tried to arise while you weren’t here.

As you’re getting off the elevator, completely forgetting about the drink in your hand, you take rushed steps toward the door that lead to the room where almost every meeting is held. When pushing the door open, you do your best to stay as quiet as possible so that you can make you way to the back where the assistant usually stands. “Come on in, Miss y/n.” Scrunching your face up, you halt in your steps when CEO Suh recognizes your presence. “I’m so glad to have you join us.” Your heart is beating out of your chest, eyes scanning some of the familiar and non familiar faces in the seats at the table. When you recognize the guy from the elevator, you lock eyes with him and he can tell by the look on your face that he was the last person you expected to see here. “Forget something, Miss y/n?” Johnny’s voice snaps you out of the million questions you were asking yourself. “Uhm, yes, I’m sorry Mr. Suh, it seems that I forgot the papers you requested for today’s meeting.” Leaning against the table with his elbows propped up, Johnny is searching your face from across the room and its taking everything in you to not crumble to the ground. 

“Good thing we still have the powerpoint slide.” He laughs as he leans back in the chair and turns toward the screen behind him as the other men around him join in on the laughter. The meeting starts and not shortly after, Johnny wraps it up with closing statements and a thick layer of his charm on a finishing note. “Thank you all for coming, please feel free to email me for any questions you may have.” Both you and the assistant stay put while Johnny shakes the hands of every man in the room on their way out. You didn't fail to notice the guy from the elevator watching your every move throughout the meeting and he didn’t seem to be shameful about it either. “Someone found their dinner I see.” The assistant snickered as she whispered it into you ear, making the heat of your body turn your cheeks into a light shade of pink as you roll your eyes and sip on your neglected drink in you hand. By the time everyone had cleared the room, both you and the assistant started to clean off the table and readjust the chair in preparation for the next meeting. 

“Girls, walk with me please.” Johnny was usually playful when he wasn’t talking business, so for both of you to feel the firmness in his tone made you nervous. After making sure everything was back where it was supposed to be, the three of you exited the room and slowly made a round of the floor. “You know I love you both right?” With agreeing hums from the both of you, you started to get an uncomfortable feeling of where this conversation was headed. “Without the two of you, this company wouldn’t be where it is today. Not saying that the other department head’s don’t do a good job, because they do.” 

“So what exactly are you saying, Mr. Suh?” You’re more relieved that his assistant had the guts to say it before you did, but also scared of the answer. “Seeing how the whole building has been buzzing about the news of the new CEO, I’m surprised you didn’t catch on yet.” Johnny led the two of you around the floor you worked on briefly before redirecting towards his office. “You’re seriously not leaving, are you?” The sigh that escaped his lips confirmed you worst thoughts. “Johnny, tell me this is a joke and you’re only doing this to get back at me for kinda calling you a dick this morning.” 

“You called me a dick? When?”

“Not important right now, what’s important is if you’re leaving then why would you leave us with someone named Haechan?” Just as you and the assistant were about to protest and beg Johnny to reconsider leaving, Johnny pushes his office door open and to much surprise, the guy from earlier is sitting in his chair at the desk. “Ouch, that one is gonna leave a wound.” With his hand over his chest, he pats the spot over his heart when your eyes lock with his. “Speak of the devil—girls, meet your new boss Lee Haechan.” 

You know that moment in cartoons where the characters have overly exaggerated eyes that look like they’re popping out of their heads and their mouths hang down to the floor to show overly shocked they are by the news and/or scene in front of you? That was exactly how both you and the assistant looked, except you eyes and mouths can’t exaggerate like that and the sheer embarrassment floods your cheeks to the point they are a crimson red. “Yeah, that wasn’t your finest moment, y/n.” Immediately covering your mouth to let out the gasp that threatened to escape, you take a moment to let everything settle before composing yourself in hopes to be salvaged for the events from this morning and just now. “She’s got a mouth on her, Johnny, she’s the one I told you about from the elevator ride.” Judging by the smile on Johnny’s face, you can tell he isn't too surprised by whatever events your new boss, Haechan, told him. 

“Yeah, you get used to it pretty quickly, she’s one of the best in this entire company.” Silently, Haechan rakes his eyes up and down your body and if you were anyone else, that alone would’ve had you eating out the palm of his hand. “Are we just going to ignore the reason why you’re leaving us?” The assistant piped up, directing the attention off of you to which you were thankful for. “I’m getting old, I’m starting to want to settle down and maybe even vacation a little to enjoy my youthfulness before I turn into my father and I figured a young and talented guy like Haechan would fit perfectly.” Haechan got up from the desk, moving from behind and opted to stand next to Johnny who was leaning against the front of his desk.

Now that you’ve gotten a better look, more up close, you see why Joy said he was cute. He had a sun-kissed dew to his tan skin and the sharp features that adorn his jaw were one of the many eye catching things about him. Despite him being shorter than Johnny, he was still very tall in the way he carried himself and that helped him stand out in a room full of people. He also had a way of moving and controlling the environment of the room, his voice was too smooth for his own good and his gaze was intimidating, but his presence was relaxing. “I’m guessing you’re his assistant and the one who isn’t shy to holding back is his secretary?” Unsure as to where this could be leading, the both of you silently nod while he moves in closer. Have you ever thought about switching their positions?” Neither of you were sure who he was directing his question, opting to staying quiet while he circles the two of you. “In the beginning, y/n was my assistant, but when we got new hires, she asked to be put on as my secretary and it’s been that way since.”

Haechan was humming, tapping his lips as he walked around the two of you. It felt primal, almost as if he was looking for weak points within you both and choosing what he liked and what he wanted to pick apart. “Come first thing tomorrow morning, switch positions until avised otherwise.” Both you and the assistant gave each other a questioning look, similar to the look Johnny was giving Haechan, but no one rebutted and you both lowered your heads as you turned on your heels and made way for the exit. The rest of the day consisted of you sitting at your desk, doing you job for what felt like the last time till you took you lunch break. Sending off a text to Johnny that you were taking your hour for lunch, he rescinded back with a thumbs up and thanked you for the notice in advance. Usually, you would’ve gone in and told him face to face, but since Haechan was in there with him and he was trying to show him all that was left ot learn, not many people have been back and forth in the office today. 

You opt on going down to the cafe located a few floors down to grab a premade lunch and head back up to Joy’s office to fill her in on the shitshow your life has been. As usual, you give her door a couple light knocks before peaking in, except this time she actually had company inside with her. The image of her body being pressed against Jaemin’s will forever be burned in you mind as you immediately shut the door. The sound alone caught both of their attentions and the two separated instantly. After a couple of minute pass, Jaemin comes out of her office with his shirt now buttoned up and the lipstick your beloved best friend is wearing stained his lips. To much surprise, he didn’t try too hard at removing it as he gave you an apologetic smile before disappearing around a corner. Turning to reattempt to enter the office, you find Joy leaning against the front of her desk with her hand over her mouth as you guess she tries to shake off the embarrassment. “Having fun or should I come back another time and let you continue?” 

She immediately throws up the middle finger as you enter the office laughing, shutting the door behind you and going back over to the seat you occupied earlier. “Anything you’d like to share with the class?” Attempting to fix the hair that you can only assume Jaemin ruined, the blush on her face crept up from her neck. “He was just helping me with some files that needed to be rearranged.” Opening up the lunch you got from the cafe, your eyes flicker up to her as she wipes the smeared lipstick off her face before reapplying. “Seems to me he was trying to rearrange something else.” She laughs, leaning forward to pick off the bits of your lunch you put in the lid for her. “Enough about whether he was going to be doing some rearranging, tell me about the mysterious hot new CEO everyone is dropping their panties for.”

Taking a big bite in, you think of how you yourself would describe him without sounding like every other girl in the building. “Well, to start off he seems really arrogant, not that attractive if you ask me, but he has a sweet smile.” Silent, she simply smiles and waits for you to continue. “He also kind at looked me and Johnny’s assistant like we were steak on a plate and if you ask me, that would’ve been hot if he didn’t do it in such an animalistic way. Oh and the fact that he told us that we’re changing positions starting tomorrow was kinda douchey if you ask me. You let out a huff, shaking your head while recalling the morning’s events. “Sounds to me that you think hes hot.” As you’re finishing up on your lunch and are about near the end of your break, you get up to toss away the container. “That isn’t what I said, all I said was–”

“Yeah yeah, I heard what you said, but I don’t think you heard the way you put it.” Rolling your eyes for what felt like the millionth time, you gave her a quick side hug before making your way towards the door. “Whatever you say, I gotta go back though so I’ll call you tonight if you’re not too busy smooching faces with Jaemin.” Puckering up your lips and making kissing noises at her as she scrunches up her nose at you. “Make fun all you want, at least I’m getting some!” Throwing up a finger at her, she laughs as you slip out of her office unaware of your surroundings. Just as you’re turning around to walk forward, your body collides into something—rather someone—and you go stumbling back a little. As you’re bracing yourself to hit the ground, a pair of hands find their way to your waist and keep you from ultimately becoming friends with the floor. 

With eyes screwed shut, you’re catching the breath that nearly escaped you and soothing your racing heart. As your eyes peek open, you’re way too embarrassed to see none other than Haechan standing in front of you. Well, he was actually holding you, but you’re trying not to focus on the placement of his hands. “In a rush again?” Fighting the urge to not look down at his lips, you’re convinced he can read minds when he darts his tongue out to wet them slowly. Clearing your throat, you immediately readjust yourself once you find the strength to stand on  your own two feet. “I, uh, I’m just gonna go back to my desk.” Coming out in a rush, you practically mumble the words as you brush shoulders with Haechan on your way back. The rest of the day seemed to go fairly smooth and you didn’t see much of your new CEO on your way out.

Walking in the doors felt weird knowing nothing was going to be as it was, the way you were used to. You spent some time last night looking Haechan up and observing and taking notes about him to sort of prepare yourself for the day. You did some digging on his social media accounts, thanks to the help of Joy of course, and found his go to coffee order. You also found some of his favorite snacks and a couple drinks he had up on his instagram. Planning to have all of this on his desk by the time he came in, you were sure to make somewhat of a better impression on him than you did the day before. This early in the morning, the office is usually pretty empty–so empty that not even Joy would be caught in her office until about another hour or so. As you’re passing by your now old desk, you can’t help but to frown at the lack of life that is on it. You took the picture you had of Johnny, Joy and yourself from a christmas party a couple years back and put in your room instead to give it the same joy that you had looking at it while you work. Knowing that Johnny’s old assistant will now fill it with whatever her heart desires gives you some form of serotonin. 

Pushing the doors open to the office, you’re more than surprised to see Haechan sitting in the chair with his hands glued to his keyboard. “Good morning Mr. Lee.” Your unexpected presence catches Haechan off guard, making him jump a little in his seat when he turns his head toward your direction. “Oh shit–jesus christ y/n.” Seeing him caught off guard brings a little smile to your lips as you lower your head a little to show you’re sorry. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you, I just brought you some stuff.” His attention lingers a little too long on your choice of outfit for the day and judging by the way he’s eyeing you, you start to think there’s something lingering behind his gaze. Moving his attention to the bag in your hand as you approach him, a smile begins to form along his lips.

“Here is a coffee, some snacks I picked up on the way in and a few extra drinks for in case you get thirsty and might be craving one of these.” When you place the bag down on the desk, along with the cup, you take a couple steps back and silently await for what he wants you to do next. Haechan opens the bag, looking inside as the smile on his lips edges further and further towards a grin. “Let me ask you this, Miss y/n, why did you do all of this?” The question caught you off guard, blinking a bit while trying to determine the tone of his voice when he asked. With elbows propped up on the desk, he looks at you expectantly while you internally short circuit. “I’m sorry?”

“Did you take time out of your morning just to go out and get me things I like because you found it within you to be this nice or did you have other intentions with your gifts.” The chair is pushed back when he stands up from behind the desk, walking around to make his way toward you. “I, uh, just wanted to make a good impression on you.” The sentence almost died in you throat when Haechan got close enough to hear you elevated breathing. “So if that was because you simply wanted to make a good impression, what’s this all about, hm?” Motioning his finger to the somewhat sheer shirt you chose to wear, your face immediately burns with embarrassment while you avoid meeting his gaze. “Seems to me that you’re making more of a good impression on me, Miss y/n, some might even say you’re leaving an imprint on me.” Circling around you, Haechan stops once he was standing behind you. “Do you always come off this strong to you assistants or am I special like the other girls, Mr. Lee?” You can’t see the smirk on his face, but you can almost feel it when his hands find their way onto your hips. “Dunno, never had the chance to have such a beautiful assistant like you before.” Scoffing, you turn around to face him and one thing you didn’t fail to miss was the way the dent in the front of his slacks brushed against you. “And give me one reason why I can’t walk out of this room right now and report you to corporate.” There was almost a sickening smile on his face that made your stomach do cartwheels. “Do it baby, the door is right there if you want to leave so bad.” You were now silent, contemplating on if you leave and try to pretend that none of this happened or if you’re really going to give into your human nature and take this relationship with your newly announced CEO on your first day being his assistant. 

Just as you’re about to lean in and capture his lips with your own, a knock at the takes you both away from your thoughts. Haechan let out a heavy sigh as he turned around, holding his hands near his bulge in order to draw attention away from it if needed. You step around him, going to answer the office door. One of the team directors from a couple floors down is standing on the other side, a stack of papers in his hand as he greets you. “Good morning Miss y/n.” Nodding, you step aside and let him in. “Good morning, Mr. Lee if you need me, please let me know.” Simply nodding, you turn to walk away and you’re sure the flushed cheeks that adorn your face right now are a dead give away to what was about to ensue behind those closed doors.

During the rest of the day, you expect a little of what you got this morning and to much surprise, you got the opposite. Well, not quite opposite, but Haechan didn’t come off as direct as he did hours before. Instead, he would send you looks from across the room and if you’re honest, each look he gave you shot straight down to your core. You’re not sure why you got so hot and bothered so quickly over him, but even the slightest touch would send chills down you body. Joy told you that you’re so reactive because you hadn’t gotten laid in a while and while she isn’t wrong, you find it hard to believe that a little lack of sex in your life has you melting in the hands of a man you hardly know. 

It all sounds about right, right? Wrong, oh boy you were so wrong about being sure that you were more than just attracted to him and that was why you were damn near seconds away from dropping your panties for him each time he purposely pushed up against your ass. You had hoped that maybe with time things would get easier, that maybe with the help from the toys you have back at your apartment that the tension would simmer some between the two of you, but as the weeks went on, it only seemed to get worse. There would be lingering touches between the two of you when only you were in his office, you’d catch him staring at your lips more often than not and sometimes you’d even amplify the things between you by purposely wearing something you thought he’d like in hopes to get a reaction out of him. You’re starting to think it’s worked. 

Now, there isn’t anything written down saying that an assistant’s job is only defined within the hours of work because technically, the company runs all day throughout the week. So no, there isn’t anywhere in any book that says that your boss, the one who’s been trying so hard to get in your pants, shouldn’t be messaging you on your off day asking for you to bring him his lunch. In his defense, he says he’s stuck in a virtual meeting and forgot to get something made before it started. Joy finds it to be full of bullshit and advises you to wear your finest set of lingerie, but you assure her nothing is going to happen and the little packages she shoved in your purse was unnecessary. 

When you left the shop he so desperately wanted this specific sandwich from, you’d be lying if you said the butterflies weren’t bounding around in your stomach bad up into your ribs. The closer the GPS said that you were to his house, the worse they got and you were starting to feel a little nauseous. When you pull into his driveway, you’re mostly shocked to see that his house wasn’t at all what you expected it to be. Seeing how he’s already a CEO of a pretty popular company before the age of thirty, you expected a more lavish lifestyle, but it’s almost refreshing seeing his house as if it was one next door to your own childhood home. Pulling in behind, what you can only assume is his vehicle, you put the car in park and grab the bag and head up towards his front door. 

Before knocking on the door, you repeatedly remind yourself that you’re only here to give him his lunch and nothing more. The last thing you need to do is fall into his smooth talking trap and end up coming in and not leaving when you’re supposed to or at least that’s what you’re telling yourself. Deciding on what’s worse in your head as far as the possible sequence of events, you push everything in your mind aside and knock on his door a couple times. You’re waiting for what seems like forever for him to answer, fiddling with the bag in your hand when he opens the door with a somewhat surprised look on his face. “Hey.” He breathes out his greeting as he steps aside and you take a quick step in. “Sorry for the mess, I’ve been arguing with the same people for the last couple of hours and I almost forgot you were coming over.” 

Taking in the interior of his house, a smile falls upon your lips. It’s a very welcoming and calm atmosphere, small pictures of him and who you’re assuming his friends hanging up on the walls. The more you look, the more you find a piece of him in each decoration that hung like trophies on the wall. As you started to walk around, the sound of Haechan walking away caught your attention as his silhouette disappeared down the hallway. Cautiously, you follow behind him as he goes into what you assumed was his home office. Turning the corner, Haechan pulls out the chair and plops back into it before scooting back up to the desk and starts to type away on his keyboard. The room was quite empty compared to the living room. There wasn’t anything hanging up on the walls and you kind of expected more furniture for seating, but there was just a desk and a chair and a mini fridge sitting beside the desk. Maybe the mini trash can if you’re counting it, really. 

“Are you just gonna stand there or can I have my sandwich now?” You must’ve been lost in your own thoughts and the moment it takes for his words to register in your head shows it. “Oh, uh, yeah.” Mumbling, you walk over to his desk and place the bag down beside him. You’re partly curious as to what he’s working on, but trying to not be nosy was a push and pull battle in your mind. “Is that the spreadsheet for our new upcoming project?” When Haechan turns his head toward you, there’s an unexpected smile on his lips that you quite can’t get enough of if we’re being honest. “I see someone’s been paying attention to the meetings.” Rolling your eyes in response, you lean down a little to get a better view. “Are you really expecting that much of a sales increase when it launches?” The question was more of a good thing than bad, but it seems the entire question went over his head as he zones in on your closeness. “You smell really good.” 

You’re trying not to focus on the fact that his face is inches from yours or the fact that he’s leaning in and practically sniffing your exposed skin. Maybe let’s not focus on the fact that the proximity of his lips from yours is flooding your mind with thoughts that have your heart racing. “That’s not the answer to my question, hyuck.” The nickname slipped out from your lips too quickly for you to catch and you’re almost embarrassed how closely you pay attention to him. For Haechan, he can practically hear his heart beating in his chest from the slip up that you didn’t intend to happen and it adds the cherry on top of his pride in knowing that you paid as much attention as he did to you. “I’ve got a better question.” When his fingers brush against your cheek, you can feel the heat radiating from your face as contrast to his cold fingers. “How bad do you want to kiss me right now, because I already know my answer and I just need the green to make both our dreams come true right now.” 

With parted lips, you take in a deep breath of air to prepare you for what’s next to come. His eyes that were usually a beautiful amber color seemed to have darkened with a lustful glaze to them and the look he’s giving you right now alone is enough to cause the fabric of your panties to start feeling slick. “Never met a man who said he’d make my dreams come true in such a short time.” Reaching out, his hands find their way onto your hips and his fingers immediately start to dip into your skin while he pulls you onto his lap. There’s a deep chuckle that emits from his chest, the sound sends a shiver down your spine. “Baby, give me the chance and I’ll have you seeing the stars in some of your best dreams.” The chair isn’t the most spacious and Haechan seems to notice as you struggle to make yourself comfortable on his lap. Moving his hands further down your hips and down the curve of your backside, he settles them underneath your thighs and gives them a firm squeeze before hoisting you up with a yelp earned from you.

“Only some?” The playfulness in your tone was enough for him to know that you were good to go, but he wasn’t going to let you have what you wanted so easily. With your arms wrapped around his neck, your fingers toying with the bottom strands of his hair. He was quick to bring you to his room, setting you down on the edge of his bed for you to unwrap your limbs from around him. His hands migrated from the slightly exposed skin on your hips to your chin, pulling you in for the kiss you both had been waiting for. Just as you’re expecting to be met with his lips, you’re left wondering why nothing has happened and when you open his eyes, the shit eating grin on his face almost makes you wanna wipe it off. “Are you gonna kiss me or am I going to have to kiss myself?” 

“Depends on how badly you want to be kissed.” Barely an inch away, he was so close that his breath was fanning into your lashes. “You suck, I hope you know that.” Somehow his lips curl even further and you were feeling tempted to salvage your dignity before he prolonged it any longer. “I bet you’d look pretty sucking on something else.” Reaching up to grab the collar of his shirt, you pull him in and your lips crash against one another. Haechan doesn’t fight it, instead he gives into it and leans forward with one hand moving to curve of your back. His lips are just as soft as you expected and the honey flavored chapstick he keeps on his desk is peaking through as he pushes his tongue in for permission to explore your mouth. Without much thought, your lips spread to welcome the sudden movement and the warmth it sends down your body has your brain becoming mush. 

He doesn’t fight for much control of the kiss, instead he uses his time to slowly undress you in between the kisses that started out soft and slowly started to get rougher. Once he got you stripped down to just your bra and panties, he broke the kiss to lean back and admire you. To him, you were the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen and the sheer thought of getting so close to making you his was not only affecting his lower and neglected region, but a part of his heart that he found only beats for you. Under his lustful gaze, you were starting to feel shy and pull at the blanket in hopes to cover up. Haechan almost immediately pushes your hand away, a soft look on his face. “Don’t hide from me baby, I wanna see all of you.” Kneeling down, Haechan’s hands slide underneath your thighs and wrap around to grab onto your hips. He pulls you down to the edge of the bed, eyeing the darkened spot that you seemed too shy about. 

“Are you sure you want this?” Nodding, you do your what to avoid looking down at him. His head was inching up between your thighs, leaving opened kisses on your skin. “Words baby, I want to hear you.” Taking in a breath of air, you make the fatal mistake of looking down while his fingers hook underneath the band of your underwear. Slowly pulling them down, you lift your hips up with a little wiggle to help him move them down your leg till they hit the floor with a soft thud. “I want this, hyuck.” You’re expecting him to make you beg for it, something about him feels like he’s the type to tease you and you know for a fact that he’s contemplating it. With a sly grin on his lips, he yanks your hips closer to him, spreading your legs apart to get the best view of the wetness slicking down your hole. 

“Be glad I’m impatient tonight.” Before you get the chance to respond, the feeling of his tongue took all the breath left you had in your lungs. Moving the muscle in a slow and patterned motion, he focuses on the spot he knows that’ll get you to where he wants you and moves one of his hands to your entrance. His view of you had him bucking his hips against the edge of the bed, the taste alone was starting to become an addiction for him and he couldn’t get enough. “You taste so fucking good.” He mumbles against your clit, slipping a finger into which earned a satisfied moan from your end. You’re sprawled out on the bed, gripping the blanket beneath you for some leverage to remind you you’re still on earth. With his tongue dipping down to lap at your flowing juices, the moans of his name roll off your tongue. “F-fuck hyuck, I’m c-close.” You’re almost ashamed at how quickly he’s gotten you to coming, but he doesn’t let up any. Instead, he replaces his finger with his tongue and presses two digits against your almost sensitive clit. 

“H-hyuck s-stop, I-I’m gonna cum.” Haechan doesn’t respond, instead he dips his tongue into your clenching hole while his fingers work circles onto your clit. Your moans are starting to get higher in pitch and Haechan can tell by the way you’re tightening around his tongue that your orgasm wasn’t far behind. He’s groaning into your pussy, using his hand on your hip to pull you even further against his mouth. You’re starting to feel like you’re going to explode, the tightening feeling in your stomach getting stronger each time he flicks his fingers on your clit. With a high pitched moan, you finally release against his tongue and Haechan is drinking it up. “H-hyuck, sensitive.” He likes the way you whine his name, it sounds so pretty coming from you, especially when he has you coming the way he did. He decided to be generous and slow his movements on your clit till eventually his hand stopped, despite your protest and pushing of his hand. 

When he comes up from between your legs, the glistening on his chin and mouth has you clenching around nothing. “Do you want to stop?” Despite the fact that he just ate you out like he was a starved man and you were his only source of food and water, the softened look on his face has not only your stomach, but your heart doing flips. “No, I want you, I want you hyuck.” He smiles, pulling his shirt up and tossing it aside to deal with later. He then starts to discard his pants, watching as you eye the bulge in briefs. “Like what you see?” You’re tempted to throw up a finger and tell him to fuck off, but the sight of him pulling his throbbing member out for release has your mouth watering. Not once in your life would you ever think you’d be salivating over a dick, but his was just too perfect not to admire. His length wasn’t too long to where you’d have to be hospitalized, but just long enough to make you feel like you’ll see the galaxy. His girth, let’s not even talk about how thick he is.

“Eyes up here, baby.” His voice snaps you out of your thoughts, looking up to meet his eyes. He starts to crawl onto the bed and over you, moving his hand between your legs and cupping your pussy to gather some of the wetness to spread along his tip. “Tell me if I need to stop.” Nodding, you’re too focused on him aligning himself up with your entrance. Haechan cupped your chin, moving your head up to meet his eyes. “I mean it y/n, tell me if I need to stop.” A soft smile spreads across your lips as you wrap your arms around his neck and pull him down into a kiss. You’re expecting it to be rough and sloppy, somewhat similar to the kiss you shared in the room over, but instead it was gentle and full of emotions the two of you didn’t know you were starting to harbor. Haechan’s hips slowly lowered, moving his hand away from his member to allow himself to slip into your warmth. You’re moaning into the kiss as he fills you up, inch by inch creating a beautiful stretch and the pain started to mix with the pleasure and you were in heaven. 

Pulling back from the kiss, he nuzzles his head into your shoulder as he pulls back before thrusting forward. “Fuck, you’re so fucking tight.” He starts to thrust in you in a rhythm, making your body bounce up when his hips snap against yours. “H-hyuck.” Haechan feels too close to finishing and slows down his pace while one hand hooks underneath your leg and holds it against his shoulder and chest to get a better angle. The new position has him hitting you in all the right spots when his hips snap forward and his name is rolling off your tongue incoherently as you feel your thoughts slipping further and further away. “Look at you, so fuck—fucking tight, you’re squeezing my cock so hard you just want me to cum.” The lewd words coming from him without shame made your walls clench around him even harder, too lost in the feeling of him filling you up to respond. 

The sight in front of him was one he wanted to see all the time, your breasts bouncing each time he slammed his hips into yours and the look on your face was just too perfect for him to never see again. The free hand he had found it’s way onto your clit, tracing circles with his fingers as his pace started to quicken. You could tell he was close and the wave of your second orgasm was coming in quicker than you were expecting. “Come with me baby, I wanna fuck you full of of our cum.” Haechan could’ve swore you were the love of his life when you gripped his arms and pulled him down into another kiss. Your lips melted against his while you mumble against them that you were close and before you could tell him clearly, you released all over his member. The fluttering of your walls was sending Haechan into a frenzy when his hips started to move sloppily before stilling them while he pumped his load into you. Softly whimpering, you continue the kiss and much to your surprise, Haechan doesn’t pull away. 

You wrap your arms around his neck, rubbing the upper half of his back as the two of you kiss until you’re about to run out of breath. He’s the first to pull back, much to his own internal protest, and when he opens his eyes, he’s smiling from ear to ear at the fucked out look you were sporting beneath him. Although you weren’t wreaking any makeup, the sweat glistening on your skin made you shine with the sunset coming through the blinds. “You okay?” A soft nod soothes all his worries of potential hurting or even scaring you away. Leaving a soft kiss onto your hairline, he slowly pulls his hips from yours and his softening member slips from within you leaving you feeling empty. He leans back on his knees, watching the mix of his and yours cum leaking out between your legs. “Stop staring, it’s making me feel weird.” A little laugh escapes his lips while you attempt to cover your face from embarrassment. 

He’s tempted, boy is he tempted, to lean down and lick your hole clean till every bit of cum is gone and you’re left squirming and crying on his tongue all over again—but he’s not going to overstimulate you, just yet, and gets off the bed instead. You watch him get up and make his way into the bathroom, sitting up on your elbows as you watch him start the shower. Silently, Haechan comes back into the room and walks over to the bed on the side to which you’re more accessible. Hooking his arms underneath you, he pulls you close to his chest and carries you into the bathroom where you two take a well needed and very hot shower. You don’t say much to each other, taking the shirt he offered you from his closet and staying in his arms when he asked you to join him on the couch to watch movies. 

When you left the next morning, you didn’t expect this to become any sort of routine. You went to work the following Monday and went about your business as usual. Of course you had to fill Joy in and she wasn’t all too surprised, but she understood why you ditched her that Saturday night and didn’t answer your phone till the following afternoon. Nothing was supposed to change between you, you were supposed to stay professional and be his assistant and respect the boundaries that shouldn’t have been crossed once before—but you don’t exactly remember when it all started to fall apart either. 

One day, you’re bringing him his paperwork he asked for and the lunch he wanted and the next, you’re sucking his dick under his desk while he takes calls from over seas. That’s not even the worst part of it all, between being bent over his desk in the middle of the busiest part of the day, you found yourself in his bed—not only on weekends, but weekdays too. That in itself was a problem and you didn’t want to address it, but when you found yourself sleeping over so much that you didn’t have to worry about clothes for work the next morning because he already had clothes you left before hanging in his closet—yeah you really needed to pull yourself together. 

Joy started to notice your change in behavior, the way you were more smiley and always busy with either doing things for Haechan or being the thing he’s doing at the moment. She made a couple comments here and there, telling you you’re biting off more than you can chew and you brush her off because there was no way that you were getting ahead of yourself, but everyone around you who looked a little longer at the way you two interact, they’d see there was more going on between the both of you. 

Things in the office have been pretty tame recently, no one is doing anything alarming and everything seems to be running smoothly, just like the hand going down Haechan’s arm from the substitute secretary—a little too smooth. The girl you switched jobs with is off on her honeymoon for a week and since her job is important, Haechan brought in one of the more experienced interns a couple floors down. You offered to take over the position, but he argued that he needs you by him at all times and you think that was only for him to get his dick wet whenever he had you alone. Lately, you two haven’t been on top of one another as you’re used to and you have her to blame. 

“Sounds like you’re jealous.” With one brow raised, Joy is leaning against her desk with her arms folded across her chest. Jaemin is sitting at one of the chairs you used to occupy when you had more free time to barge into her office. “She’s got a point.” Shooting him a look, he instantly raises his hands up and silently admits defeat and decides to stay quiet. “I’m not jealous, it’s just—it’s just so aggravating because I can’t do my job if she’s always barging in and asking the same damn questions, only worded differently.” She snickers, pinching the bridge of her nose while you huff. “What’s so funny? I don’t remember this being a joke.” 

“Just say you’re jealous baby, if you come to terms that you may actually have feelings—“

“Uh uh, nope, not going down this road again, I don’t have feelings for him.” She didn’t seem like she was buying your argument and you didn’t feel like having to come to terms that maybe you actually did and the little bit of jealousy that sank into the bottom of your stomach when they got too close was due to your neglected emotions for him. “I’m just saying, if you weren’t so crazy for his dick then maybe you’d see that you really like him.” Letting out a loud groan, you push yourself up from the chair you were sitting in and headed towards her door. “I gotta get back before he starts ringing me up to find me.” She nods, blowing you a kiss to which you pretend to grab. “Be safe out there, soldier.” You salute her while turning the knob and opening the door. Stepping out of her office and letting the door shut on its own behind you, you make your way through her floor and back up to Haechan’s office. 

The door was cracked, so you could see figures moving around inside, but when you actually stepped inside, the sight before you made you feel nauseous. Haechan was sitting in the chair he usually sat in in front of his computer, but his lap was being occupied by the fucking secretary. Her hands were everywhere and anywhere on his upper body and his hands just so happened to be conveniently placed just above the curve of her ass. Of course when the door opened, the commotion caught their attention and the two started to separate. Haechan was expecting Johnny to come in, seeing how he said he was gonna pay a visit today, but when he saw you standing in the doorway with wide eyes and a sadden expression, he couldn’t stop the guilt from washing over him. 

“Sorry, I’ll come back later.” Practically mumbling the words, you pull the door shut behind you and move as fast as you can to the nearest elevator to escape having to face him right now. You’re hurt, rightfully so seeing how you’ve only been sleeping with him and thought he was doing the same, but the more you start to replay the imagine in your head, the more you realize how dumb you look. Unbeknownst to you, Haechan was trying to find you without making it known to the girl that was just grinding away on his lap that he was sleeping with you. By the time that he got her off his lap and made up some half assed excuse as to why he needed to get out the office, you were nowhere to be seen. He did what he thought would work and that was by going down to Joy’s office to find you. 

Knowing that he’d probably stop there first, you skip going to her and instead hit the cafe down in the back of the building. You’re trying to hide out, in case he comes down, but when you spot Johnny making conversation with one of his favorite baristas, you immediately make way for him. “What are you doing here, stranger?” Hearing your voice, Johnny instantly turns his head towards you with a smile on his face. “My favorite secretary turned assistant.” The two of you get a coffee and you get lunch before moving to a table of your choosing and sitting down to catch up. You explain to him why you chose the least obvious table in the area and when you fill him in on your special activities with Haechan, he doesn’t seem surprised. “I’m honestly glad it’s happening, I was rooting for you two since y’all made that weird tension eye contact.” 

“Yeah, well there’s nothing to root for since I just caught him feeling up on his secretary.” With a pout, you fiddle with the rest of the food in front of you and Johnny gets a sense of the reason why you’re so affected. “Hey, at least you know now instead of later, saves you the trouble, right?” Looking up to meet his eyes, you nod. He wasn’t wrong, at least now you know that he might be or could have already had a thing going on between the two of them—but it doesn’t save you from the pain you feel in your chest that drops down to your stomach when you think about it. “Hey, I know this is kinda late, but he’s coming in hot from three o’clock.” Without a second to brace yourself or even try to find a way out of the situation you’re about to be in, Haechan comes running up to the table and he’s clearly out of breath. 

There’s a slight dew on his face and the hair fallen over his forehead is partly stuck. “I’ve been looking for you.” You’re surprised he got the sentence out while he tries to catch his breath. “Uh, here I am.” Johnny can see the tension between the two of you and you’re ever so thankful he decides to step in. “Not you, y/n, he obviously meant me because he knew I was coming today and you’re on your lunch break.” Johnny gives you a look with his eyes and you nod slightly while trying to get up from your seat. “Wait, no, but yes, I was looking for you too, but y/n, can you come with me for a moment?” 

“Uh, sure, but can we make it quick so I can finish my break?” He doesn’t respond nor does he acknowledge Johnny again before grabbing onto your wrist and guiding you to the bathroom area of the cafe. Once you got close, Haechan pulled you off to a corner and moved you to where your back was almost against the wall. “Where did you, wait let me rephrase that, why did you run off earlier?” You’re confused, why did it matter to him that you ran off and more importantly, why did he try so hard to find you just to ask you that. “I saw you were busy, so I left and took my break while I was at it.” He doesn’t buy it, you can tell by the expression on his face that he didn’t buy any of what you were saying. “That’s bullshit y/n, you know that I know that so just be honest with me.” 

You didn’t like the position you were in, your back was quite literally against the wall and your heart was on your sleeve, but you covered it to keep it safe. “I don’t see why this is a big deal so if you’re done interrogating me, you have a meeting in an hour and I can’t get it set up until I finish my lunch.” You can see the frustration on his face, his brows furrowed as he looked down into your unbothered gaze. With a shaking of his head, he backed away from you and made his way back through the cafe to grab Johnny. Staying in the corner, you took a moment to yourself to collect your thoughts till you peaked around to make sure they were both gone. When the coast was clear, you immediately made your way back up to Joy’s office and she seemed to be ready for you when you walked. 

The rest of the week went on and much didn’t change, you were giving Haechan the cold shoulder and he didn’t seem to want to push you to stay around him any longer than you wanted. The substitute secretary seemed to be spending more time in his office than you were and you didn’t dare to go in while the two of them were alone inside. Instead, you would move down a couple floors and spend your lunch hiding away in Joy’s floor talking amongst the media workers in hopes that they would take your mind off of Haechan. For the most part, they provided a good distraction and even Mark helped you by letting you talk out how you feel and giving you a perspective from a guy. Much to your surprise actually, you and Mark got somewhat close and when Joy was being whisked away by Jaemin, you sat around Mark’s desk area for you both to keep each other company. 

After the week was finished and the following came through, you expected some things to go back to normal now that the regular secretary was back, but much to your disappointment, the girl from floors down kept coming up for some dumb reason to get her hands around Haechan and the fact that he seemed to be enjoying it made you feel sick. You were doing your best ignoring the two of them and just keeping your nose in your own business when you had to be around him when she was there, but you couldn’t stop the longing feeling from telling you that it should be you he has his hands wrapped around and it should be you that he makes stupid jokes to when he finds he needs a distraction. This continues for the rest of the week and you still haven’t had much of a conversation with Haechan until the weekend comes and you’re sitting in your car with Mark after you two just left lunch.

“I can’t believe you’ve never had food like that before.” Mark wasn’t the best cook, to which you found out by him nearby burning down your kitchen, so when you suggested getting brunch instead the two of you immediately got on the road. “Listen, I’m a breakfast guy, but I’m not like a midday breakfast guy, you know?” Mark takes the aux, putting on a song you weren’t entirely familiar with. “What is this, is this why you still don’t get bitches?” Laughing, he’s almost more shocked that you don’t know the song playing over the fact that you basically said he has no game. “You’re telling me that you’ve never heard this song before?” Shrugging, you start the car and check your mirrors before pulling out the parked space. “Our music taste is clearly different.” 

“I guess you got a point, oh hey, you got a text.” Picking up your phone, he brings it close to you for you to unlock it and see if it was actually important or not. “It’s Haechan, he wants me to come by to get some papers before Monday.” You can tell Mark is confused as to why you’re needed over the weekend, but he also knows that maybe this would be the chance of you two finally talking this out and everything going back to a somewhat normal. Seeing how you were on the way to your house, you had to reroute and Mark was fine with tagging along for the drive. He secretly just wanted to see what kind of place Haechan lived in and you don’t blame him because you too were curious when you first went to his house. It didn’t take you long to get there, pulling in and putting the car in park before unbuckling your seatbelt. “I won’t be long, I promise.” 

Nodding, he throws up two thumbs and wordlessly wishes you good luck, to which you’re thankful for. You make your way up to his front door, knocking a couple times and wait only to end up with no answer. Just as you’re about to walk back to your car, the door swings open and Haechan is standing there while trying to catch his breath. You immediately see his shirt has been stretched out, almost as if it’s been pulled on and his shorts are loosely hugging his waist. “Y/n, I didn’t—I didn’t know you’d be here this quick.” You’re speechless, not knowing what to say or what to even think about until you see someone scrambling around in the back and low and behold, the same girl from the office comes rushing out. She doesn’t say much, only mumbling a sorry as she pushes past both you and Haechan to make her way down to the car she parked a bit further down. 

“Sorry, I didn't mean to cut your company time short.” You’re about to pivot around and go back to your car to let out a well needed cry, but Haechan has had enough and he grabs your wrist to keep you from running off. “Hold the fuck on, what is that supposed to mean?” You scoff, hating how oblivious he is to what has been running through your mind. You hate how oblivious he has been to how you’ve been acting and why you’re acting this way. You hate how badly it hurts to see him with her, with anyone else that isn’t you and you hate yourself for thinking of what could’ve been going on between them. “Just give me the damn papers and let me go on my way, I hate people waiting for me.” 

“Oh you mean that guy in your car? Guess you wasted no time hopping from me to him.” Walking off after letting go of his hold on your wrist, he stomps off towards his back office and you follow behind. “Are you fucking kidding me right now, I’m the one hopping around when you’ve been fucking some girl who worked with you for what, a week?” Haechan snatched up papers off his desk, walking out the room with frustration in his eyes. “Why does it even matter who I’m with or not, you’re not my girlfriend and we aren’t a thing.” Each word felt like a punch in the gut, the painful realization that all the little touches and each time he offered you to wear his shirt was because he was being nice, not because he had underlying feelings the same way you did. “I wasn’t even fucking her, she was trying to fuck me and I was trying to be respectful and keep her off my fucking lap, but you wouldn’t know that because you weren’t even around half the time.” 

“You’re right, I wasn’t around because seeing her hands on you and knowing that no matter how I felt about it would’ve changed anything.” Everything in his mind started to click and by watching the way you were shutting him out right in front of him was enough for him to realize you wanted more than what you two had going on. “Y/n, can we just—“

“Just give me the papers so I can take Mark home, the guy I’m not fucking by the way.” He was hesitant, holding out his hand for you to take them in hopes that you’d change your mind and stay. There was so much that wasn’t talked about and so much that needed to be said and the last thing he wanted was for you to walk away. Instead, you grabbed the papers from his hand and walked out of the house without another word coming from you. Mark could tell you were upset and judging by the way you were fighting back your tears, he didn’t say anything and for the rest of the car ride, it was silent. 

Since you last saw Haechan at his house, over a month had passed and so much changed from that day forward. The following week, you got an email saying that you’d be returning back to your original position and part of you hated yourself for letting all of this happen the way it did. Many nights Joy spent time in your apartment with you, holding you on the couch while you cried yourself to sleep night after night. When she wasn’t able to comfort you, she either sent Jaemin and his friend Jeno to keep you company or she asked Mark to sit with you till she had the time to come back over. She even went as far as asking your neighbor Renjun to check on you periodically and he wasn’t opposed to the request, just a little bit concerned. That same first week you went back to being the secretary, Haechan sent you an email at the end of the week stating he’d be going out of town. You were sad over the thought of him not being here, even if he only passed by you a couple times a day unless you went in to give him paperwork. 

Johnny came in to sit in for Haechan when meetings were happening, not budging when you asked him where he might be. He always said something along the lines of, “I don’t know what he’s doing, but where he’s at is where he needs to be.” That went on for weeks on end and the love you had for your job slowly started to fade. After another half month had passed, you started to feel like coming into work was more of a chore and less of a joy and that was when you decided to put your final notice in. Johnny didn’t want to accept it when you presented it to him, but he knew that after the shit storm you had been through, maybe this would be best for you. The few floors you had worked on before threw you a party the week before your last considering as you didn’t plan on coming that last week and everyone gave you the best farewell hug as the party started to die down. You’re going to be sad, deeply sad to leave the job you worked so hard for to get where you were, but you were just hoping that it would be the right decision. 

That’s what keeps you up at night, the thoughts of this either going south and you feeling even more lost and out of place or if this will be the beginning of a new chapter of your life and maybe you’ll finally find peace. The sound of rain crashing down against your windows was in a way washing away your thoughts for you to revisit in the morning and you’re just about to doze off until you hear a banging on your door. At first, you think it’s the thunder outside and choose to close your eyes and try to go to sleep. You hear another banging and by now you’re convinced it’s urgent. Getting up from your bed, you walk through your apartment and out to your door. 

When you get closer to the door, you see Renjun’s jacket laying across the arm or your couch and figure it’s him at the door waiting for his return. Twisting the knob, you pull the door open and you’re almost shocked—actually no, you are definitely shocked to see Haechan standing in front of you. Soaked from head to toe, the jacket he is wearing did him no justice to protect him from the cold weather that is still coming down hard just a couple feet away. “Hyuck, what are you—weren’t you just, actually what the hell is wrong with you?” Shivering, he goes to speak, but the lightning striking in the background is too loud for him to get decent words out. You reach out, pulling him into your apartment and shut the door behind him. 

You rush down to get towels for him to dry off and it doesn’t do much work for either of you, so you opt for him to take a shower and pull out some of the clothes you had from his house for him to wear. While he was still showering, you made a hot cup of tea and set it on the coffee table for him when he got out. With a towel draping over his head, he comes out and immediately heads to the living room where he saw you pass. You’re sitting on the couch, fiddling with the remote to put something on for background noise when he plops down beside you and reaches out for the cup. Much to his delight, you made it just the way he likes and he silently thanks you for that. Once you find something decent to put on, you set the remote down and let him settle a little while sipping on his cup. 

“Hyuck, what are you doing here and why were you soaking wet?” Haechan is thankful you’re the first one to break the ice, sitting up to set his cup down before leaning back into the couch and turning to face you. “I got back into town and Johnny told me you were leaving, I know it’s late and I didn’t know what to do to stop you or even where to find you, so I looked up your employee file and immediately made my way to you.” You stay silent, knowing there is more he wants to get out, but just has to find the right way to say it. “I didn’t mean to leave after we last talked, I didn’t want to leave things like that, but my mom needed me and I immediately went home to help and I was gone and I didn’t have time to focus on anything, but please believe me when I say all I could think about was you.” It shouldn’t have made you feel all warm inside, but it did. Knowing that he was gone and how badly you needed him here and him needing you there made all the butterflies in your stomach start to flutter. “Please, say something.” 

“I really like you, regardless of how bad I wanted to hate you for being the biggest dick ever, I just couldn’t get over you and when you were gone, I really didn’t know what to do anymore.” Haechan was smiling from ear to ear, trying to hide the redness of his cheeks as you heard you clearly confess your feelings for him. “How about I make you a proposition?” Honestly, you’re a little intrigued when he reaches out and grabs your hands. Pulling you towards him, you have no choice but to move with him and climb into his lap. “How about you be my girlfriend and don’t quit.” Interlocking your hands with his, he rubs his thumb over yours and it brings the biggest smile to your lips. “And what’s in it for me?” Humming, he takes the moment to think about what he already knows he is going to offer. His lips form a pout and you swear in that moment he never looked more kissable than now. “How about, I got you and you got me.” Leaning in, you press your lips against his in a soft peck. “Deal.”

©︎𝐋𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐔𝐍., 2023

[littleguypumpkinsheep]

IHNMAIMS CAST RE-INTERPRETATION

Due to my visceral hatred of the game and the way they handled the characters, I’ve decided to re-write their stories a little bit! I’m using the book, comics, and radio drama as reference, and my own headcanons too for fun. This is all For Fun

Ellen

Things I’m Keeping

Born in Trenton, New Jersey

Computer scientist

3 degrees

Went to Stanford university 

Graduated high school early

Lived with her grandparents 

Hope in humanity

Self assured

Sympathetic

Rape survivor

Little to no interest in sex in general

Work driven

Career focused

Things I’m Changing

Black rights advocate

Queer rights advocate 

Feminist

Outspoken

Trans woman 

Lesbian

No interest in motherhood

Fell into a depression when her assault left her with chronic illness and pain

Has OCD

Character Notes

Highly distrustful of people. Kind and caring, but her concern for others is surface level. Struggles with the fear of men and violent intrusive thoughts. Favorite color is red. It calms her.

——

Ted

Things I’m Keeping

Born near Shelby, North Carolina

Grew up extremely poor

Lived on a farm

Interest in reading

Knack for mechanics and engineering

No traditional education, self taught

Studied intensively

Education focused

Grooming victim

Charming

Relied on his body for money

Philanthropist

Rich

Good sense of morals

Kindhearted

Things I’m Changing

Closeted bisexual

Not a con-artist

Not a racist

Not a womanizer

Has anxiety

Has a paranoid personality disorder

Touch adverse

Struggles with dermatillomania

Demisexual

Character Notes

Had always been paranoid and anxious even before AM, but it made his problems even worse. Struggles heavily with internalized homophobia, and gets visually uncomfortable when queer topics or people are discussed. Prideful and egotistical out of habit, but is deeply insecure in reality.

——

Gorrister

Things I’m Keeping

Born in the Midwest

Troublemaker as a child

Disrespect for authority 

Did poorly in school

Moves across states for work

Practically friendless

Has experience as a construction worker, electrician, mechanic, and a trucker

Interest in reading

Prefers to stay home and eat home-cooked meals

Wants to settle down

Divorced

Anti-war

Left-leaning political activist

Strong sense of morals and justice

Wanted a family

Things I’m Changing

Marriage with Glynis was not abusive

Did not strike his wife 

Divorced due to wanting different things out of life and overwhelming mental health issues

Bisexual

Queer rights activist 

Has depression

Has CPTSD

Born in Texas specifically

Struggles with alcoholism

Struggles with anger issues

Is an artist

Character Notes

Very deeply loved and adored his wife. He did everything he could for her, but it just wasn’t enough. Glynis’ worsening mental state became too much for either of them to handle, and Gorrister didn’t know what to do. Sending her to a mental hospital was a non-option, things got worse, and she commuted suicide. He blames himself for it every day of his life.

——

Nimdok

Things I’m Keeping

Born in Düsseldorf

Jewish parents

Went to medical school 

Apparent lack of compassion

Gay

Scientist

German

Has dementia

Had a partner in Brazil

The oldest of the group

Self assured

Logical

Things I’m Changing

Not a nazi 

Not decrepit 

Has early-onset dementia specifically

Not AM’s favorite

Low empathy

Low sympathy

Has a general disinterest in other people

AroAce

Struggles with schizophrenia 

Character Notes

While unable to sympathize or understand other people’s emotions, it wasn’t ever in his nature to be outright mean or cruel. Rather, his dementia is what caused the change in behavior. Sometimes he has moments of clarity, where his true nature can be seen for a few fleeting moments. Still retains his sharp scientific mind.

——

Benny

Things I’m Keeping

Gay

Professor

Good looking

Intelligent

Born somewhere in America

Strong willed

High perseverance

Self assured

Physically strong

Things I’m Changing

Had absolutely nothing to do with the military 

Did not have a wife

Is not needlessly mean or violent

Career driven

Focus in academics

Knows sign language

Struggles with chronic fatigue and pain

A softer man

Interest in nature and the outdoors 

Character Notes

Never one to start a fight or even anger much at all, Benny was laidback and easygoing. He had a calm life, and his personality was upbeat. Nothing ever seemed to bring him down. Not even his chronic illnesses, as frustrating and disheartening as they could be. In his free time he was somewhat of a survivalist. 

[lovelytsunoda]

crying over it all // clement novalak

summary: there are few things in this world more mortifying than failing your drivers test when everyone else your age has a license. it’s made even worse when your boyfriend is a racing driver

pairing: clement novalak x female reader

warnings: reader fails her driving test, which leads to significant self loathing, clem is just trying to be supportive and god I need someone like him right now

authors note: guess who failed her drivers test 🙃 I’ve rebooked it but now I have to commute by way of three buses to my college campus :( and don't even get me started on field placement...i wish i had never left it this long but at this point i need to trust to process and find some sort of way to move past it.

“I’m sorry, but you will need to retake your road driving test. I understand that’s not what you wanted to hear, but you need some more practice. you can see the full list of mistakes inside.”

it had been twenty minutes since she’s heard those words, and she still felt shaky on her feet. her hands had shook and tears fell down her face as she went inside, taking a number and waiting in a notoriously long dmv line to admit to the woman at the desk that she needed to rebook her test.

she didn’t want clement to see her like this, utterly defeated and trying not to scream her lungs out as she watched four teenagers in line in front of her get their licenses.

she was twenty one, for god sakes. she should have been driving by now.

she was sitting on the wooden bench, slouched I gracefully and letting the tears fall as she played with her car keys when clement found her.

what was the point of even owning a fucking car if she couldn’t drive it?

“oh, love." clem frowned, feeling his own stomach sink when he saw how distraught she was. "i take it that things didn't go well."

"could you tell?" she sobbed, trying to wipe her eyes. "was it that obvious? i hate myself, clement. how is it that i can't do something that pretty much everybody my age has been able to do since they were sixteen."

his heart ached as he heard her words. he'd passed his test on the first try, and he drove things for a living, so he's never really thought about what it must have been like for her, having to bum rides off her friends and family or to be bound to the transit schedule. while she was in college, it hadn't been the biggest deal, although it was a minor inconvenience. now that she would be working full time, the stakes were higher.

"i'm sorry, pretty girl." he frowned, pulling her closer, allowing her rest her head on his shoulder. "but you can take it again, and you know what you did wrong, right?"

"i start work next week, clem. i've looked up the commute and if i take public transit, it's almost two hours each way. and i feel like i'm a burden by constantly asking people for rides, or telling them that if they can't pick me up, we can't hang out. hell, my mother had to drive to my first date with you!"

clem chuckled at the memory, the image of a frazzled y/n stepping out of her mother's suv and frantically scanning the parking lot for clement. moments later, her mother had insisted to getting out of the car and introducing herself to clem. y/n thought that she would combust then and there.

"your mother loves me!"

"yeah, but imagine being a grown-ass adult and still having to get your mother to drive you to appointments because you don;t want to chance the bus route not aligning with your appointment time? i feel like my grandmother, and she's ninety, clement. she had her license revoked because she has cataracts."

"i know it hurts right now, but you are never a burden, y/n. your friends love having you in the car when they drive. hell, i feel like i drive better when you're next to me. i don't mind driving you places, you know. it means that i get to spend more time with you."

she smiled at the gesture, turning to allow clem to cup her chin and wipe some of her tears away. her face was flushed, eyes red and puffy. she couldn't shake the idea that she might have made a scene inside the testing center.

"i know. i just wish i could be more independent. transiting gives me so much fucking anxiety. i went over the curb when i three=point-turned and an old lady on a mobility scooter started yelling at me."

"but you never go over the curb."

"exactly! i think i was nervous, when i practiced the route with my dad, there were never any cars on the road. and i think after that happened, i got into my head and it screwed everything else up. i'm such a fuck up. i feel like i've let everybody down, especially you, since you helped pay for my fucking car."

'"hey, hey, don;t talk like that. you'll get it. i promise you. you know jenson button didn't pass his road test on his first try, right?"

she snorted, sitting up straighter, but still clutching clem's hand. "did he really?"

"yeah, and i think lando failed as well."

"yeah well, i've seen how lando drives. that doesn't surprise me at all."

having a laugh seemed to help, and at least now if people mwere staring at her it was because of the f2 driver sitting next to her, not because she was a grown woman who still couldn't drive and decided to cry about it, and then fling her keys onto the grass.

"i have some plans i might have to move around, and then i need to call my parents, and then my dad can take me out to practice a bit more but i have to trust that when i take it again in october, something goes right. because i know exactly what i fucked up."

she moved to get up from the bench, clm following closely behind as she shamefacedly handed him the keys to her volkswagen. well, the volkswagen now, since she couldn't drive it without someone who'd had their license for five years present.

"i'm proud of you for trying. i know that this was something you put off for a long time because of your anxiety, and even though it didn't work out, at least you tried." clem encouraged, his arms comfortably slung around her shoulders as she laced her fingers with his. "hey, it could be worse. you could have had your dad drive you here."

"clement, don't even joke!" she laughed. "you know that i hate taking transit, and that i don't always feel safe going places alone."

"i know. and if you ever feel unsafe, or too anxious to function, or just like you want to see my gorgeous face, call me. as long as im in the country, i will come and get you. and if im not, i'll send someone i trust."

"like who? max fewtrell? his driving is worse than landos."

clem snorted. "i meant ria. or pietra.

"thank you, clement." she sighed, leaning into him as he unlocked the car. "i love you."

"i love you more, pretty girl." he kissed the top of her head softly. "it will all work itself out, love. just you wait. and then you'll be the one driving me places."

TAGS:

@httpiastri @magnummagnussen @oconso @thatsdemko @scuderiamh @libraryofloveletters @diorleclerc @sidcrosbyspuck @cartierre @clemswrld @love4lando

[seeingivy]

time travel 

satoru gojo x f!reader 

in which you have horrible news waiting for you in the future 

an: i wrote this for a class. i don’t even know what this is. is it dystopian...apocalypse....??? idk don’t ask me I have no clue it’s finals week

- 

“The best way to do things in life is to cheat. If we go in the future, we can figure out how to solve the problem at hand.” 

You turn to face the absolute idiot jabbering in your ear right now, who was none other than the one and only Satoru Gojo. 

“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. We need to sit here and think about a real plan. Have you never watched Back to the Future? Knowing you, you’ll somehow make it worse.” 

Your rejection of his idea leads you and Satoru into breaking out into an argument - like you always do. There’s never an absence of talk back from him and there’s never an absence from you either. You’re sure that the two of you could fight till the end of time, but people always broke up apart before it ever got that far. 

Satoru Gojo is the neighborhood idiot. After graduating from college, you opted to live with your grandmother, who conveniently lived one town down from your college. You were able to keep your job, your current friends with a respectable commute. Plus, the drive gave you time to scream music in the car on the way to and from work. 

Why your lovely little grandmother decided to befriend that absolute asswad Gojo was lost to you entirely. You figured he was abusing her for the food she always made him and were constantly trying to convince your grandma of his devious ways. This sparked a little bit of animosity on his side. 

The girl - whose name you don’t know that Satoru claims can time travel - stands between the two of you. Her eyes are pinched shut, her palms facing towards the ceiling. You look over the top of her head at Satoru and signal for his attention. You mouth at him. 

what the fuck is she doing 

the hell if i know, she’s your grandma’s friend

In a flash, her palms whip to the top of you and Satoru’s shoulders, knocking the wind out of you entirely. 

 - 

When you come to, you find yourself flat against the marble floor, Gojo still passed out next to you. You lean over, trying to nudge Gojo awake. 

“Gojo.” 

“Gojo, wake up.” 

You can feel the despair settling in your chest, nearly shaking his entire frame now. 

“Satoru, please wake up.” 

His eyes flutter open and a smirk makes its way across his face. 

“Well, since you asked so nicely princess.” 

“I hope you choke and die on that fucking tongue, Gojo.” 

He stands up first, extending his hand out to you to lift you up. The two of you take in your surroundings realizing you are not where you were a few minutes ago. You can see the confusion you’re sure is plastered all over your face is absent from his face all together. 

First of all, the floor you were passed out on was marble. But your grandmother had granite floors. The cabinets have been changed from their wooden exterior to white cabinets, the kitchen neatly set up. Your grandmother couldn’t cook without causing a hurricane - so whoever’s house this was, it wasn’t hers. 

“Where are we?” 

“I think your skull got thicker on impact. The future can do that to you.” 

“The future?” 

“Yeah, dumbass. That’s what she was doing with the palms and eyes closed thing.” 

You turn to glare at him ready to start, arguing with him again. You get a few insults in before you’re interrupted by a set of two footsteps behind you, freezing the two of you in your spot. You and Satoru turn around to find you and Satoru staring back at you. 

It’s…you. But it’s not you. Maybe it was someone else? You can see a shadow of your features on the face of this person, but she looks nothing like you. She can’t be you. Her hair is longer, with streaks of purple. There are more wrinkles on her skin than yours, smile lines indented along the eyes and the cheeks. 

And that can’t be Satoru. He’s actually attractive. He’s grown much taller, fitting perfectly into his frame. His shoulders are broad, his arms toned, but you can tell that the older Satoru still has that boyish charm to him, from the way he’s smirking at the two of you. 

“Do you remember this happening, ‘Toru? I know that you traveled in the future but I didn’t realize I did too.” 

“I don’t remember this one, bug.” 

You and Satoru cannot move. Your feet stay planted on the ground, staring back at not-you and not-Satoru. You hesitantly walk forward, staring the two of them down. Your Satoru stays in his spot, and you can feel him grimacing at how weird you were acting. 

“My apologies. She can be weird like that.” responds Satoru. 

Not-You and Not-Satoru laugh. You turn to Not-You, glaring daggers at her. “Shouldn’t you be on my side? Aren’t you me after all?” 

She turns to her Satoru, raising her hand to laugh at what you just said but you’re caught off entirely by the two rings secured around her ring finger. The first is a small, delicate gold band with a small diamond in the middle. The second ring is a plane gold band, with words you can’t discern engraved on them. 

“Wait. We get married?” you whisper. 

Not-you smiles, the look on her face radiating warmth. The smile lines suit her face. Your face. The scar decorating the top of her forehead, which you didn’t notice before, seems entirely out of place on someone who seems so…happy. Are you happy? 

You hold her hand in yours, your touch ghosting against her hand. You’re scared the universe will explode if you touch her too hard. She is you after all. The ring is pretty pretty. You get married. Someone loves you. 

“But to who?” 

“You really were stupid at that age, weren’t you bug?” says not-Satoru. 

“Tell me about it.” responds your Satoru. 

You nearly forgot about that idiot, totally distracted by Not-You. You turn to glare at both Satoru’s, trying to figure out which one to slap across the face.  

“That glare is never not scary, bug. You were a horrifying teenager.” 

“Bold words coming from someone who fell in love with that glare - the first time he saw me too.” responds Not-You smirking at her Not-Satoru. 

He fell in love with that glare. He falls in love with you. The first time he saw you. Your eyes dart down to Not-Satoru’s hand, an identical gold band secured around his ring finger. You make an odd choking sound, the air constricting in your throat. 

“He gets less annoying as time goes on, I promise.” responds Not-You, handing you a glass of water. 

It’s quiet for a few seconds, the four of you awkwardly staring at each other. You can’t look at your Satoru, embarrassed to think about the fact that you might spend the rest of your life with him someday. You can’t look at Not-Satoru either because every time you do all you can help but think about how hot he is.  And you can’t look at Not-You because she looks disgustingly happy and to think that it’s because of Satoru is even more disgusting. 

You can feel a light pounding in your head, steadily continuing. 

“You feel that?” asks your Satoru. 

You nod, your eyes stinging from the pain. 

“We’re about to get sent back.” 

He turns to face Not-You and Not-Satoru, giving them a small smile. 

“It was nice to meet you, again.” 

You feel like the universe is playing a sick joke on you. How is he not phased? We just traveled to the god damn future and found out that we get married. 

“Congratulations on the baby!” 

You feel your eyes boggle out of your head. You look down and don’t understand how you missed the protruding bump in the first place. Not-You is pregnant. You feel the wind knock out of you once again, falling back onto the floor. 

 - 

You feel two hands shaking you, bringing you back to the present. When you open your eyes, you see Satoru and your boyfriend, Kenny, leaning over you, their eyes drowning in concern. 

You sit up and Kenny wraps his arms around you, pressing a kiss against your forehead. His lips burn on your forehead, the image of Not-You and Not-Satoru still in your mind. Your eyes dart around looking for Satoru, until you see him in the kitchen, with a small smile on his face. 

You ask Kenny to leave and grab some medications for you at the store. You’re fine, really. But you just want to talk to Satoru. Sans Kenny. 

As he slides out the door, pressing yet another kiss to your forehead, you take a deep breath to face Satoru. You pad into the kitchen, to find him hunched over a tub of vanilla ice cream. 

“Satoru?” 

“Hm, bug? What is it?” 

You feel your cheeks turn warm at the endearment. Not-Satoru called Not-You bug. Your Satoru has never called you that. Until now that is. The words knock around in your mind, until you feel them spill out of your mouth. 

“The first time you saw me?” you whisper, looking up at his eyes. They’re warm, still free from the wrinkles and smile lines you saw on Not-Satoru’s face. 

“That’s cheating, bug. You’re not supposed to know that yet.” 

You frown, lightly pushing him as you walk past him. You dig for a spoon from the drawer to eat some of the ice cream he left out. 

“It didn’t...phase you. To find out that we were married.”  

He leans over, his fingers ghosting on the side of your face. 

“That’s because I knew that already.” 

You pause, turning to face him. 

“I’ve…met them before. A few years ago. The girl, she’s not your grandma's friend. She’s mine.” 

You pause, taking in his words. He’s known he gets married to you this entire time. Apparently, he’s loved you since the first time he saw you. 

“Satoru?” 

“Yes, bug?” 

“What did you see…the last time you went?” 

He smiles, pulling you close into his chest. Your face is resting against his chest and you can hear his heart hammering against your ear. 

“I’ve tried to do that before. Go to the future to see if there’s a solution to our problem.” 

“And there isn’t?” 

“No.” 

You frown, pulling back from him to look at his face. He looks down at you, still holding you in his arms. 

“That’s so bleak, Satoru. We’re going to be fighting curses…forever.” 

He smiles, his hand reaching to cradle the side of your face. 

“That’s not how I saw it.” 

“What other way is there to see it?” 

“What I saw when I went back was...retribution. We fight so hard to keep the peace. And we’ll stay fighting, when we’re older too. But the universe paid back our service.” 

You look up at him, shaking in his hold. 

“I get to marry the love of my life. I get to wake up to you every morning, see that smile you hide everyday. And even better - we get to make a family together. A tiny little you and me.” 

You shove your head into the crook of his neck, trying to hide your tears from his line of vision. He was being so sweet. He wanted to...marry you. Someone wanted to be with you, to love you. 

You feel his hands move, one rubbing small circles into your back and the other one tangled in your hair. You cry silently into his shoulder, the array of emotions suddenly too overwhelming. 

“What’s wrong, bug? The thought of marrying me is that bad?” 

“I just never thought anyone would love me like that. Like want to spend the rest of their life with me.” you whisper. 

“I’d fight my entire life if it meant I got to spend the rest of it with you. Loving you...is like breathing air.” 

The door clicks open, Kenny bursting in with multiple bags of groceries. You and Satoru break apart, the air feeling cold from the absence of his arms. Loving you is like breathing air. Kenny offers you the bottle you asked for and runs upstairs to start a bath for you. You watch his retreating figure, the stirring in your chest getting all…tangled up. You’d forgotten about him entirely. 

“I have every intention to wait for you, if you’ll have me. Granted, he’s at a disadvantage. I know I’ll win already.” he says, swiping the tub off the counter and walking out the door.

[whumpbug]

ITS FINALLY HERE!! THE EVENT!! YIPEE!! so this fic was written when i first made simon and archie so i decided this is them in their early days, when they weren't as close and just getting to know eachother. the boys!!!!

whumperless whump event day 1: emergency first aid! @whumperless-whump-event

alcohol as sanitizer / "it's just a scratch, i've had worse."

caretaker: Simon

whumpee: Archie

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

Simon sighed contentedly as he finally sank into his well-worn sofa. Work was hectic. His commute was hectic.  Even the weather was hectic, considering the bus delays from the rain. After a long day, he was more than happy to let everything else fall away as he fused with the sofa for the foreseeable future.

He let his eyes slip closed.

..And then he heard the thud at his window.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me..” He murmured as he peeled his body out of its comfy spot.

He made his way to the back window of his apartment— the one right at the fire escape. He already had a idea of who was at his window at this ungodly hour, but he was still silently praying it was just a stray cat or something easy to deal with.

He had no such luck. He pushed up the window and scanned the area, but a weak cough drew his eyes to the floor of the platform.

Archie, the vigilante that had been chronically stopping by, flashed him a sheepish grin before it morphed into a wince.

“Surpriiise..” He squeaked.

Simon stared at him with an unamused expression, pinching the bridge of his nose and sighing.

So much for his relaxing night in.

“What brings you to my window sill this time?” Simon deadpanned, crouching through the window and kneeling beside Archie.

“Oh you know, the usual,” He started, grunting as he shifted slightly. “I’ll be out of your hair in no time, I promise..”

“I’ll bet.” Simon reached out a hand towards Archie. “Alright. Let’s get you up.”

A panicked expression flashed over Archie's face as he gulped quietly.

“How about we uh.. we take care of things here tonight..? Y’know.. just.. to speed things up..”

Simon tilted his head, cocking up an eyebrow.

"On the fire escape?"

"Mhm.."

“You do know I don’t have night vision, right? How am I supposed to treat your injuries if I can’t see them.”

“Oh I’m sure you can figure it out! We can always use a flashlight or.. or..” Archie said, face suddenly blanching.

In the dim streetlight, Simon finally noticed it. The dark stains on the metal platform and railings of the fire escape. The way Archie had yet to move a muscle since Simon came to the window. Even the thud that he had heard initially, which was uncharacteristic for Archie, who usually took to knocking politely when he could.

“Archie. Lift your shirt.” Simon's grave gaze poured down to Archie, who swallowed reflexively.

“I.. It’s really just a scratch, I’ve had worse—“

“Lift your shirt.”

Archie finally obliged with grumbles of “At least take me out to dinner first..” escaping his lips.

He sucked in a sharp breath as he peeled away the sticky fabric from his wound.

“Shit..” Simon whispered. The wound was.. atypical. Even in the low light, Simon could see the skin around it was angry and red and inflamed. It was on its way to infection for sure.

“It looks worse than it is..” Archie placated, but he was fooling no one. Especially not Simon, who’d been down this road with him a few times before.

“Sure, and that’s why you look like out about to keel over and die,” Simon said sarcastically. “Don’t move. I’m gonna go get the first-aid kit.”

“Wasn’t planning on.. going anywhere..” Archie panted. Despite trying to seem fine, Archie couldn’t deny that the wound hurt. It was taking more of a toll on him than he’d like to admit. So much so that he hadn’t even realized he dozed off until he heard Simon's soft footsteps on the metal platform.

“Don’t fall asleep just yet, okay?” Simon hummed, lightly shaking Archie's shoulder.

Archie only groaned, blinking at Simon.

“Here, I have a job for you. Can you hold the flashlight? Just point it at the wound,” Simon explained, pressing a small flashlight into his hand.

Simon could see now that Archie was a lot worse off than he was letting on. His face was sheet-white, and beads of sweat dripped down his brow. He had to act fast, and to do that, he needed to keep him awake, just enough to get him inside and patched up.

With the slightly shaky light held by Archie, Simon got a better view of what he was working with. He grimaced.

“Alright, I'll need to disinfect it before I start sutures,” Simon explained. “It’s going to hurt. All we have right now is alcohol.”

Archie whined just a bit. He'd used alcohol to clean smaller wounds, and even that was unbearable. He couldn’t imagine what this would feel like.

The next thing he knew, Simon was shoving rolled up gauze between Archie's teeth for him to bite down on. Archie was silently grateful.

Simon unscrewed the top of the bottle and sucked in a breath.

“I’m sorry..”

As soon as Simon splashed the liquid on the wound, Archie threw his head back with a silent scream as his teeth dug into the gauze. Tears pricked in his eyes and he writhed against the red-hot stinging. A pitiful whimper escaped him, before he could stop it, and he didn’t miss the way Simon's expression softened.

The sutures were done relatively quickly, which left Archie, utterly spent, lying limp against the railing of the fire escape. He wasn't sure he could move if he tried. 

“Cmon. Let’s get you inside..” Simon coaxed, standing up and bending at the waist to pick up Archie in a bridal carry. Usually, Archie would be vehemently against such an act, but the blood loss must have been getting to him because he found himself burying his face in the crook of Simon's neck, letting the warm arms lull him into a soft sleep.

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

[alittlefrenchtree]

I'm against any kind of hatred towards Nick because he "hates rwrb" because obviously that's not the case but I don't understand why we can't even express legitimate perplexity in the way he completely ignored (on social media) everything related to the film including the announcement of the sequel.

Today he will definitely announce the new project and ok, that's right, it's his job but isn't the sequel his project as well? Why doesn't that project deserve the same space on his socials? I don't understand why we can't talk about it in any way because we are immediately attacked by the throat and there is not the slightest possibility of exchanging an opinion and understanding.

ok, this one is polite and i’m too weak to resist talking about marketing stuff so i’ll bite.

Because there is nothing to talk about? Nick’s social media and instagram accounts are exclusively dedicated to promote what he has to promote (and also trying to be in Arsenal’s good graces, free tickets and all access invitations) and believe it or not, there is rules to follow with social media management.

Without talking about a ban or an exclusivity, there is still a schedule to follow when you promote something, similar projects on the same plateform and general logic about what you’re posting and when. When you share something, there is a goal to achieve. Remind your audience of a release date. Remind them they have your movie on their watch list and need to watch it (again). Lead them to like a post, to watch a trailer. Poke your favorite football so they notice you and give you stuff. Show to the people who are hiring actors to do stuff that you might not be a big name just yet but you’re hanging out with them and know how to wear expansive watch as well.

Breaking news, actor’s personal feelings is rarely on the list. Fan service for the pure purpose of fan service either (at least not in this case).

So regarding of the sequel, right now there is nothing to promote? Not a release date, not a teaser of a teaser of a teaser, not a visual (the generic ugly thing made in 5 minutes on canva.com isn’t a proper visual) not even the beginning of a shooting date. You don’t promote something when there is nothing to promote. The announcement was early, given that they had nothing to say about it except for Matthew and Casey writing it together. So it’s was mainly for fans. It doesn’t need Nick’s audience’s boost to spread the news because everybody who cares about rwrb (and also their grandmas) already know about the sequel. And there is nothing more to do at this point since there is nothing more to sell. Would it make sense if you were asking why there isn’t any billboard out there promoting the sequel? Like to say what? They didn’t even share a year for the movie. Not even a title 😭 So far it’s only a fan news.

So no, I don’t understand the perplexity (and even less the worse takes i’ve read out there). If you already know he cares about rwrb and its sequel, why would you need the validation of a random story or a random post?

That should be an opportunity for you and everybody who shares your feelings on that to ask yourself about what meaningless social media management bother you so much. That would be a more interesting question. Maybe it could help you make some of your relationships with people a bit healthier.

Took this one because i had free time on my hands while commuting, but i’m on my way to eat delicious food and next time i’ll have that much free time and energy on my hands will be in 9572847 business days so we’ll see if i’ll answer on any follow up on this conversation. Take care xx 💜 (and don’t forget to celebrate Nick’s announcement!! still on the Knives Out 3 boat personally)

[emberfrostlovesloki]

Your Side of Town [Aaron x Reader]

Photo credits: Left (@taybrinafavs) Center (@dilfgifs) Right (The Killers - From "Your Side of Town" music video)

Prompt: When the reader starts going to UC Riverside to get her PhD, she meets the dangerous and enigmatic Aaron Hotchner in her Tax Fraud class. She is forced to ask why she likes him, and if he is as dangerous as her friend, Emily Prentiss, says. 

Pairing: College!Aaron x Non-BAU!Reader, fem!Reader. The reader uses she/her pronouns 

Category: Angst 

Word Count: 14.5K 

Content Warnings: Language, mention of drinking alcohol, beating [Aaron], mention of gangs and criminal organizations, a brief description of murder and blood. Please let me know if I missed any. 

A/N: Hi all! I hope you are all doing very well! This is a long note, but hopefully, it will explain this fic better before you read it. It started this story a few months ago when The Killers released the song “Your Side of Town.” It gave me such strong Aaron vibes that I had to write a fic based on it. I decided to write a college AU where the reader is in school with Aaron who is working on his law degree. I’ve made some changes to the setting and period, but I’ve tried to keep the characters as true to the show as possible, even with the changes. Much of this chapter is setting up the future storyline and depending on if people like this chapter or not, I might work on a part two. This is something very different for me, so I hope it’s okay. Please be kind to yourselves this week and do something you love, you are so special. If you enjoy this fic, likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated! Love Levi - ❤️

List with all stories 

y/n 

y/f/c/d = Your favorite coffee (or coffee adjacent drink). 

d/b = department building 

y/l/n = your last name. 

y/f/s = your favorite subject 

The California sun beat down on y/n, as she walked toward campus She walked quickly, even if she didn’t need to. Her pace demonstrated her stress. She had barely slept even though she had intentionally gone to bed early. y/n couldn’t tell if it was worse to be in bed unable to sleep or be awake and dreaming, longing, praying for sleep. She couldn’t decide and she was too nervous to think about it at the moment. The walk from the commuter parking lot to the UC Riverside campus was pretty, but it was a hot day. As y/n dipped into her normal coffee shop, it was a bit more crowded than usual, but certainly not as bad as it would be at 10 a.m. 

Perhaps getting up and out of her apartment at 6 a.m. had paid off. As she reached the counter, y/n ordered a coffee straight and an iced y/f/c/d. She lingered by the pickup counter, looking at the mostly older patrons sitting and reading the local paper or chatting with friends who were up as early as themselves. 

These people didn’t seem like students. One or two of the twelve patrons of the shop could be seniors, but it was hard for her to tell. y/n knew she was rubbish at guessing ages. Always had been. y/n’s name was called shortly after and she made it back outside. From the coffee shop, it was only a short walk to the crosswalk that would take her onto campus proper. Because her hands were full, she leaned her hip against the crosswalk button. The electronic voice droned out, “Wait to cross, West Campus Drive.” y/n let out a sigh. She knew her anxiety was unfounded. She had graduated from undergrad, and then grad school, there was no reason she should not be able to obtain her PhD in four or five years or so. 

Even if this was the case, imposter syndrome was still a constant stalker. The crosswalk voice told her she was good to walk. y/n had zoned out, and sure thing. The walk sign was on. y/n got a move on. The road wasn't long, but cars were known to speed down the blind curve, and over the summer, when y/n had moved into her apartment, got to meetings with her advisor, gotten used to campus, and gotten to know her two roommates, she had seen many an accident on West Campus Drive. She didn’t fancy getting into an accident. Not when their life was finally coming to something. 

y/n had agreed that this was going to be the year that she stopped running from her past. She contemplated this as she made it safely onto campus and the short walk to her d/b. As she approached the door, a colleague whom she was getting to know, Ted Anderson, walked up the steps. He saw that she didn’t have a free hand and moved more quickly. He pulled the door open and flashed her a smile before saying, “Moring, y/l/n. You ready for this?” y/n gave him a small smile back and said, “As ready as I’ll ever be. I’ve got my syllabi printed, my two coffees, and Fraud in the U.S. tonight at six, so if it’s not a good day, at least it will be a busy one.” Anderson nodded as he moved behind her into the building saying, “I’m sure you’ll do great.” y/n gave him a soft smile as they diverted paths. Her office was on the third floor and his on the first. y/n wasn’t sure why she had been graced with an office with a window, but she would enjoy the sunlight streaming through the window as she worked. She had nothing to complain about there. 

The first half of the day went well. The two sophomore-level courses on _y/f/s had gone by quickly. The first day both lecture halls had been packed with around two hundred students each. The imposter syndrome seemed to melt away as a learned mask of confidence and the need to be in control took its place, even if the persona wasn’t fully formed yet for herself or the class. It was refreshing. It gave her the boost that she needed until lunchtime rolled around. y/n moved to the department office and got some copies of a reading from the student worker, got a fresh cup of much worse coffee from the shared office pot. 

The last two classes of the day were more varied than the first. One was a junior-level cross-cultural course on y/f/s and the last, at 3:30 p.m., was a freshman introductory course on y/n’s field of study. Although it already felt far too early to be behind on work on the first freaking day of the semester, that didn’t mean that there weren’t things to do. Chief of which was annotating the U.S. Fraud and Compliance course that y/n was auditing this semester. y/n’s field of study and research was primarily in equity and inequality in the United States over the last two decades. As it turned out, things like tax fraud and White-Collar crime turned out many of the policies that caused inequality and not murder or violence as the government and law enforcement liked to tout every year with new stats that “Crime was going up.” 

Sure Organized crime was a part of it, but a lot of the original crime syndicates had come out of the early 1920s because of prohibition and bootlegging. And new crime rings had popped up from the disastrous War on Drugs. The policy had only seemed to push cocaine into marginalized communities which allowed the law to continue over-policing and criminalizing those communities. Thus, the desire to audit the Fraud course. 

The elderly professor, Dr. Porter, had been kind enough to respond to y/n’s email asking if he would allow it. He had requested a meeting with her in his office in central campus. She had gone, and they made their introductions. Dr. Porter had asked, “So why do you want to take the course? It’s a pretty small class, with only twenty-two students. There’d be room for you, I just want to make sure we’re all on the same page. I’d require that you do all the work and participate in the class. It wouldn’t be fair to the other students.” y/n explained her research to the man and he listened and took some notes. When she had finished her explanation, Mr. Porter nodded and said, “That sounds very interesting. I’d be happy for you to take the course as long as you don’t think this coursework along with your teaching and research will be too much for you?” 

y/n had thought about this, labored about it even. However, she knew that it would be a lot. However, taking a course on the subject taught by an expert in the field, felt like a safer bet than trying to learn it all herself. That was just too much history and policy for her to attempt to grasp solo. With a determined look, y/n nodded and said, “Yes. It’d be an honor to Take this with you and your students. Thank you so much for making this accommodation for me. Porter smiled and said, “Well, thank you for your enthusiasm. Fraud and Tax Law isn’t something people usually get excited about. It’s bound to be an interesting semester.” The man’s words were a foretelling of the start of something much bigger than a student taking on an extra class.

         y/n turned her attention to the syllabus for the course. It was thick, with pages on pages about the class, an introduction for the materials to be covered, the four pre-class reading assignments, two pages of prerequisites, and then the grading system, required texts and materials, and lastly, The course calendar. y/n had skimmed it ounce and done all of the pre-readings which were stashed in a file folder in her suede shoulder bag. Now, she was going to sit down and thoroughly annotate the lengthy syllabus. When y/n had finished with that, she moved outside to get a quick bite to eat and another coffee before she would need to head to her office, grab her things, and head across campus to the Law Building. 

The quad was now much busier with students scurrying about to and fro. y/n moved into the crowd and moved her way upstream to the crosswalk she had been at a few hours prior. y/n had intended to pack a lunch, but in the bustle of the morning, it had slipped her mind. She wasn’t going to be too hard on herself about it. She would make sure to bring one tomorrow and all the days after. One meal out wasn’t going to ruin her budget. y/n did have to keep a pretty strict budget. Even if UC Riverside was a preeminent school in California, and even though her department had offered her a position in the program and waived her tuition costs, with rent, gas, and food prices all at a premium, the small pay she got from her lecturing always seemed to be running low by the end of the month. Thus, the need for a budget. If she worked hard enough and was dedicated to her financial plan, she would be able to start some savings. She needed that. She wasn’t going to be caught unawares like she had in the past. She wanted to settle. To stop running. And that took a different kind of work than constant escapism. 

After a light meal, y/n moved back to the coffee shop from before and got a coffee and a shot of espresso. y/n doctored her coffee the way she liked and then walked back to campus. If nothing else, her constant desire for coffee got her some daily exercise. Everyone she had spoken to had promised her that Cali would be a consistent cool temperature. However, as the five o’clock sun beat down on her, if did not feel cool. The month she had moved in with her roommates, the papers and TV kept saying that they were in a “record heat wave,” and that the heat was expected to keep rising until the first two weeks of September. y/n longed for it to be just a bit cooler. A 70-degree day would heal her and put her at ease. The heat did the opposite. 

Back in her office, y/n took off her blazer and fanned herself with some loose papers. She sat, and drained the espresso knowing this much caffeine was a bad idea so late in the day, but that was a later problem. For now, she sat down, took a few deep breaths, and gathered her things for her cross-campus commute. When everything was packed and ready to go, she checked her outfit, choosing to leave the blazer behind. She didn’t need to impress the people in this class as much as she did for her students. Entering the large lux building, y/n moved up the stairs to the fourth floor and found her class. There were still twenty minutes before the lecture would begin, but that would give her time to find a seat that was in the back so the real students could be close to Dr. Porter.

         There were four students already in the class scattered in the small space. There were tables, with two chairs at each table. They were set in two neat rows that led to the front of the room with the wooden lectern and the bulky equipment for the projector. y/n took a seat at the table on the far-left side of the room. There were three extra seats in the room to accommodate the twenty-two students and herself. Thus, she felt alright if she sat in the seat near the row and not next to the wall. It would give her a better view of the screen. y/n had an idea that she was going to be having a lot of eye strain this semester. A few more students moved into the room, and y/n got out her colored markers and notebooks, and the pre-readings along with the syllabus. 

Just as y/n was taking the first sip of her coffee, five students walked in followed by Dr. Porter who called her to the front of the class. y/n flushed slightly but waited for the man sitting across from her to get seated. He had a backpack slung over one shoulder, black Levi’s, a white shirt, and a leather jacket. He was far less professional-looking than many of the other students in the room. 

Some of the younger men even wore suits, though y/n was unsure if such gestures mattered to the law professors or not. The man was, if not professional, at least very attractive. He had smooth light skin and a sharp jaw. His dark hair contrasting his skin was short and had a little curve in the front, framing his face well. The man gave her a wicked smile, his dark brown eyes captivating as she moved past him now that he was finally seated. For a moment, y/n thought that those were the kinds of eyes she could get lost in. The thought only lasted that, though, a moment. She pulled herself together and thought, “Come on now, some pretty boy isn’t going to turn your head like a teenager, this isn’t a romance.’ Those types of feelings were uncharacteristic for y/n, and she let the idea pass quickly the man turned to who appeared to be his friend and said, “Yeah, I’d skip Constitutional with Leery. Try and see if you can get a section with Menendez. He made it fun, as strange as those sounds coming from me.”

         y/n moved down the aisle and got some looks from the other students. When she got to the older man, she smiled at him and asked, “What can I do for you, Dr. Porter?” Porter pointed to the Rolodex and said, “Do you know how to work these things? This one is frozen on a blank slide. I’ve not grown with the technology as you can see.” y/n nodded and said, “Let me see if I can get it working for you, Sir.” y/n moved behind the equipment and knelt. She made sure her skirt was at an acceptable level. Even if no one was behind her to see anything and she was wearing black tights, it was a natural teacher habit to make sure everything was covered appropriately. 

The slide deck appeared to be jammed. y/n fiddled with it with her finger for a moment and it slipped back into place with a satisfying click. y/n looked up to Dr. Porter and asked, “Do you have the deck you want to use for today?” The man nodded and looked around his desk for a second before he found the miniaturized slides and handed them to her. y/n slotted them into the space and pushed them down. She looked up at the screen and it now read the first slide: “Tax Fraud in the United States. LW5000. Fall 1991. Dr. E. L. Porter.” y/n stood up and the Doctor said, “You’re a lifesaver. I always need someone younger than me to help me with this new-fangled technology. How was your first day? Did everything go smoothly?” y/n nodded and said, “I’m happy to help anytime, and the first day was good. Busy but good.” Porter smiled and y/n moved back to her seat. Not all of the class hadn’t been paying attention to what was happening at the front, but some had been watching the two speak so causally with looks of veiled interest. 

y/n moved back to her seat, the man in the leather jacket shot her a quizzical look, one eyebrow raised higher than the other. y/n turned her face away from his gaze, trying to hide the rising blush in her face. She wished someone less attractive had decided to sit next to her. Honestly one of those pretentious suits would do fine, but she was happy with her spot and she wasn’t planning on moving. She was sure the attractive man would do something to irk her and stop whatever little infatuation she felt for him. 

The class started in earnest and because it was such a small class, the professor had everyone give a small two or three-sentence introduction with each student’s name, what year they were in, and what they hoped to do once they graduated. Dr. Porter started at the front and moved back. The answers ran the gambit from a desire to work in the FBI fraud department, to a criminal lawyer, to a CPA. y/n noted names of students who seemed particularly driven but not overconfident. She knew she was going to need help with the course given it wasn’t her area of study. When it got to the man sitting across from her, she looked at him. He raised a lazy hand and said, “Hey, I’m Aaron Hotchner. I’m in L2 and I want to be a public defender when I graduate.” At hearing his name, some gave a little gasp, and others shot him a dirty glare. This reaction didn’t seem to bother him. However, it left y/n at a bit of a loss. She had no clue why this man’s classmates had reacted this way. There was a dynamic playing out here that she was not aware of. 

The university taught around 26,000 students each semester and there was no way she could keep up with half the drama. It took half a second to realize that she was the last person who needed to speak, and she snapped back to attention. y/n gave a small smile and said, “Hi. I’m y/n y/l/n. I’m just auditing this class. I’m a PhD candidate in the y/d department. This class aligns with my research and Dr. Porter graciously is allowing me to sit in.” Porter inclined his head toward her and said, “We’re happy to have you Ms. y/l/n. Now with the introductions over, let’s cover the basics of the Criminal Tax System. It will be helpful if you pull out your readings as I will be calling on some students to answer questions.” 

Everyone shuffled to get the readings out of their bag. y/n looked as Aaron pulled the readings out of his shoulder bag and flipped to the first page of the reading. If he seemed very casual in his dress, the copious notes he had taken on the reading showed that he was at least taking this class seriously. y/n wondered if she should add his name to the list of people to try and befriend for help, but the class's response to his being here had her hesitate. She didn’t want to get involved in some bigger drama that she wasn’t aware of. She looked up from his papers only to catch his dark brown eyes. Both of them looked to the front of the class as Dr. Porter called on the first student for an answer. Neither y/n nor the enigmatic man across from her got called during the first three hours of class. The last slide on the Rolodex was the lengthy homework included a chapter from the required textbook and five separate cases for review. Dr. Porter dismissed everyone. Some students moved to the front to introduce themselves to the professor while others moved out into the hallway. It was dark as y/n moved outside. As she pulled her shoulder bag up and over her neck, someone called her name. y/n turned and found Parker, a student who seemed like a nice and cool student trying to catch up to her. y/n slowed and said, “Hey, what’s up Parker?” The girl beamed at being remembered and said, “I just wanted to hear more about your research. It sounds very cool.” y/n flushed and said, “Really? Thanks that’s nice.” The two walked in the same direction talking a bit about each other, the class, and y/n’s research. The whole walk made y/n feel like her work wasn’t for nothing, or extremely boring. The two women exchanged numbers as they headed toward different parts of campus. 

As she moved, yet again someone called her name. The voice was familiar and she whipped her head to the side to see Aaron now rambling beside her. It had become clear that he had been walking behind her and Parker, and y/n hadn’t noticed him. She chastised herself for not being more aware of her surroundings. y/n let out a breath and said, “Oh, it’s you. Is there something you want, Aaron?” Mr. Hotchner gave a sly smile indicating that he knew she knew there was more to him than he was letting on. Aaron replied to her question with, “Are you really smart or something, or really stupid?” y/n had not expected to be insulted in her first real interaction with this odd, odd, man and said, “Sorry, what?” Aaron laughed slightly and said, “Well auditing Tax Fraud with Porter? He’s like the most demanding prof in the department. He’s brutal from what I’ve heard.” 

y/n flushed, and was grateful that it was too dark for the man to see. She had heard of Dr. Porter's reputation as a strict and demanding professor. She wasn’t going to let on that she was unaware of the man’s full reputation. Instead, she said, “Well, on this subject, maybe I’m somewhere in the middle.” She hesitated and added, “And, he was the only person willing to let me audit the course. I might be a fucking idiot for agreeing to this, but I’m going to do my damn best. It’s the least I can do for Dr. Porter to let me in. The worst that can happen is that I’m the class clown and dunce. I’ll still have learned something if that’s the case.” 

It seemed that Aaron had not expected that response. He stopped in his tracks for a moment and looked at her with incredulity. He gave a very soft, “Huh,” and then kept walking next to her. y/n wondered, ‘Why was this handsome man walking with her? What he could want from her apart from a reaction was beyond her.’ Aaron looked like he was about to say something else, but another, new voice pierced the quiet atmosphere of the near-silent campus. Aaron and y/n looked over as a built man approached saying, “Hey, Hotch. How was the first day?” 

Aaron rolled his eyes and said, “Fine. Normal. How was your first day, Morgan?” The new man stepped into the light. y/n observed the new figure. He wore dark blue jeans and a loose green t-shirt had hid what y/n assumed was a built frame given the man’s strong forearms. The color of his shirt matched the deep tone of his skin well. The man looked her over for one second before saying, “Yeah it was fine. I mean I slept through my first alarm. So I skipped the rest of my classes for the day. Sunk cost ya’ know.” At hearing this, Aaron facepalmed and said, “Morgan, are you trying to buy yourself another fucking semester here?” 

It was clear to y/n that ‘Hotch’ and Morgan were friends given how casually they were addressing each other and Aaron’s use of profanity. y/n felt like she was intruding on a private conversation and was glad when she reached her turn-off. She moved to the left and Aaron called out, saying, “Good luck with all your stuff.” She looked over to the two men and said, “Yeah, thanks. See you next week.” As she moved farther away, she could overhear Morgan say, “Who was that chick man?” And Aaron’s response of, “Just a girl in my class. Now come on. Let’s go home. I’m fucking tired.” There was something so odd about Aaron, his demeanor, and his ‘friend’ to y/n. She shook off the encounter for the moment as she finally got to her car. 

When y/n got back to her shared apartment at around ten p.m., the lights were still burning downstairs. She thought, ‘Must be Emily.’ Emily was the only one that made sense. But the young attractive brunette didn’t normally stay up that late. Emily’s morning shifts required her to be up at around four a.m., so it was odd that she would be up so late. It certainly wasn’t Garcia. y/n’s most eccentric roommate, Penelope Garcia, seemed to be up all hours of the day and night. y/n had wondered if Garcia took uppers to stay up all night at the club or with her coding pals, or sometimes both at the same time. The one time Penelope had dragged her out to a rave, y/n found it miraculous that the spunky blonde with her gang of friends had elbowed their way to the back, found an empty table, and pulled out a clunky PC. The group, and Garcia in particular had a penchant for finding creepy guys online and making sure they got reported to whatever authorities seemed necessary. Pen was fantastic with finding people online, and y/n was glad she wasn’t on that woman’s bad side. Shockingly, Garcia hadn’t touched a drop of alcohol, but all four of her friends took pity on y/n, clearly not in her environment with the strobe lights and deafening music in the background. Each of the friends got her a drink and a nice man asked her to dance. It had been an exciting night, but not one she planned on replicating soon. 

When y/n entered the first story she was met with Emily smiling and holding out a glass of red wine for her. y/n smiled and said, “Em this is so sweet. What’s the occasion?” y/n noticed the uncorked bottle on the counter. Prentiss grabbed her glass and said, “To celebrate your first day of course. I know you’ve been stressed about it. So, first cheers. And then tell me how it went.” y/n clinked glasses with Em and began regaling her with the events of the day. She tried to keep it short, knowing that her roommate would want to get to bed soon. Prentiss listened with rapt attention. Emily never seemed like the type of person y/n could be close friends with. y/n would like to think she was easy to get along with. She kept the shared space clean, offered food when she made it, and tried to stay pretty quiet and unobtrusive, but the more time she spent in Emily’s company, the more she liked her. Emily was so dedicated given all the crap her job threw at her, especially all the sexism and misogyny she faced. But even on top of those hurdles, she generally was just a funny and caring person. Emily was fiercely dedicated to the people she liked and it seemed that y/n was one of them. y/n wasn’t sure if she had taken pity on her when she first moved in or not, but if it was the latter, y/n wasn’t even mad about it. She had felt truly lost when she first moved to the city, and Emily, given her beat as a policewoman for the LAPD, had told her where to avoid late at night and showed her around their apartment area thoroughly. That had been a kindness.  

As y/n finished wrapping up her narrative of the evening events, she included the strange interaction with the man who sat across from her saying, “And there was this really cute guy in my class. Strange but cute. He kind of insinuated that I was stupid for auditing the class which was insulting, but damn was he cute. Everyone else in the class seemed shocked when they heard his name.” Emily raised an eyebrow and said, “Well, who is this dude? Do you remember his name?” y/n rolled her eyes and said, “Well yeah. How could I forget given the reception he got? His name’s Aaron Hotchner. Do you know him or something?” At hearing the name, Em stilled and seemed to pale. This was not the response y/n had been expecting and she said quickly, “Should I know who that is?” y/n was at a loss for this response for a seemingly hot guy in a leather jacket. Emily took a deep breath before saying, “I’d stay away from him. The Hotchner name has a, well a reputation.” y/n furrowed her brows and said, “Okay. Now you have me worried. Who is this guy?” Em let out another breath and stroked her hands through her hair saying, “Well. I can tell you this. His dad, Mr. Hotchner Sr. is the head of one of the largest gangs in this part of the city. The man and his gang are in deep with the drug trade. As for his son, well, from what I hear he’s not involved. At least not yet, but people are keeping an eye on him.” 

y/n couldn’t stop herself from letting her mouth drop open. That was a real surprise. Suddenly the response of the class made more sense. To have someone of that status, studying law was an oddity. How Aaron Hotchner had chosen this path of study was bizarre. It wasn’t her place to think about it, but even if that was the case, the idea stuck with her. Prentiss could see this look stuck on y/n’s face and warned, “Listen, y/n. Just for your sake, stay away from him. I can’t tell you what Aaron Hotchner is doing with his life, but his dad’s not a good guy. I wouldn’t want you to get tied up in some unsafe stuff.” y/n flushed and said, “Don’t worry Em. I’m not planning on it. He might be cute, but given your new information, he’s not that cute. Now, pour me another glass. And I’ll be happy to pay you back for half the bottle, given how good this stuff tastes, I’m assuming it’s not cheap.” Prentiss held out the bottle and refilled y/n’s glass saying, “Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. This one’s my treat.” y/n smiled at Emily. She really was the best. Once they had finished off the bottle, both women moved quickly to their rooms and headed to their separate bedrooms. Both women fell into bed bed too exhausted to think about much more than sleep. 

The semester seemed to move like those in grad school had two years before. Without concrete classes to ground her, y/n’s classes and her weekly meetings with her advisor were the only things that kept time a constant. y/n had prepped for the larger sophomore seminar class, but the smaller classes she just arranged weekly. The law class also added a level of stability, if not a whole load of extra work on top of her own research and writing time. It was a burden but also allowed her time outside of her office to make some new friends. y/n found friends with Parker and Steven. They would prep for their case assignments. After the first three weeks of the class, when all three of them had been called on, now, they had a better understanding of how the class would be. 

It was a learning curve to be in a law class. It wasn’t like any of her other classes. There had been plenty of courses centered on discussion mostly, but this type of interrogation that the class required was difficult for her. y/n and her new friends who were more adept at law than her prepped for this type of questioning. Demanding, interrogatory, personal even. The group had all worked on coming up with practice questions, some more accurate than others. After the fourth class, the friend group had each been called. It had been y/n’s first time. She had been called about the United States v. Caldwell case in 2016. Her copious notes had helped her provide a semi-succinct response. The friend group walked across campus after class each going to their respective cars. As they walked, they talked about the class, and y/n’s response, and what she might have said differently. As they moved down the quad, they rambled slowly across the campus not wanting to leave each other’s company yet. 

A new voice was added to the mix as someone left one of the many buildings on the quad. y/n looked up and smiled. It was Spencer. y/n beamed, she hadn’t seen Dr. Reid in some time. She had met him at one of those awkward faculty socials. Everyone else at the social had at least one friend there except for her and Spencer. So naturally they had made their way to each other and introduced themselves. The young and brilliant Dr. Reid was teaching an abnormal psychology class and getting a third PhD in chemistry while also teaching. 

Suddenly y/n had felt very stupid and that her schedule didn’t seem that busy at all. Dr. Reid, having done this for a long time could see the look on her face and he rushed to reassure y/n that she was taking on a lot too and that he was just a freak who literally couldn’t get his mind to slow down no matter how hard he tried. That had made her feel better, at least a little. Then Spencer had asked her about her research and his genuine interest in her field had validated her even more. Her imposter syndrome slipping away. As it turned out, Dr. Reid was a fount of knowledge about her area of interest as well, and the young slender man offered to give her information or loan her any of his slew of books if she wanted. y/n had readily agreed and the pair swapped email addresses. y/n thought that if she was less busy she might have thought Spencer was the type of man she might be attracted to. But she was too busy for an attempt at a romance and she had just moved in. Getting her feet under her was her current goal, not finding a fling. Perhaps, if she survived the semester she would think about it later, However, she would be surprised if the young man wasn’t taken already. From what she could see, he was a catch. After the mixer b, both of them had spent their social batteries and Spencer was nice enough to drive her to her car in the commuter lot. As they parted ways they vowed to meet up for a coffee and chat soon. 

They had met up once before the semester started for coffee at another place the genius liked. They had both bemoaned making syllabi and the heat and anything else they wanted to get off their chests. The conversation had been cathartic. Unfortunately, the semester had picked up at a furious pace and they hadn’t met up since then. Spencer had been kind enough to send her an email or two checking in, which she had responded to. y/n was very pleased to see him again in person. She called him over, and Dr. Reid’s long legs got him to her in a few strides. Reid was in a sweater vest and black slacks with his distinctive brown shoulder bag. The two friends checked in. After a brief conversation, y/n introduced Spencer to her friends. 

Everyone said their hello’s and the four of them now moved across the large campus. The lights on the quad seemed to be placed haphazardly, not fully or well illuminating the space. Emily had told y/n to carry pepper spray when she walked at night. y/n assumed that Preniss had multiple stories of nights gone wrong for young women on campus given her job as a policewoman, and y/n believed her. Thus, y/n always carried some pepper spray with her in the side pocket of her bag, just in reach. The group rounded a corner to see the first strong light of the night. The beam of light from a solitary lamp shone down on a large imposing figure silhouetted against the glow of the light. Suddenly the warm camaraderie of the night that had been forming between the new and old friends felt like it was cut with a knife. Something felt very wrong about the person standing in the shadow and the group of young adults stopped in their tracks. Even though all their cars were in this direction, nobody felt like moving forward. Noting the palpable tension in front of them. 

They all stood there for a minute looking to see if the figure would move, but he didn’t. The figure stood stock still, apparently unaware of the group's intimidation of him. Or, perhaps that was the goal as another, familiar voice came from behind them. The four students turned and y/n was surprised to find Aaron approaching them with a stiff gait. y/n was used to seeing him smooth and loose and what appeared as ease, but this was not that. Suddenly y/n wondered if that apathetic demeanor was all an act that Hotch put on. Aaron stepped forward and everyone in the law class they shared with him cocked a weary eyebrow. Hotch sighed and said, “I’m not joking, beat it. Find an alternative route or take thirty minutes to talk in the library or something. Just don’t be here right now.” Parker, Steven, and Spencer’s eyes all moved to the man in the shadows and then turned, but y/n kept her eyes glued on Aaron. 

After hearing Emily’s warning about him, she had withdrawn a bit in class. Hotch had spoken to her a few times, and she engaged him in light conversation about her research and job as a senior lecturer. It seemed that the conversation never steered in his direction. It was never about his life or his choice to join law school even though y/n had tried to get him to say something about himself. The man was infuriatingly hard to read. y/n wasn’t sure why she was trying to get him to speak about himself. It wasn’t like Aaron was interested in her. For the most part, when he talked to her, it seemed to fill empty silence during the breaks in the class. y/n didn’t want to be involved in any drama, certainly not anything that would get her in trouble. But the enigmatic figures of Aaron were enticing in his way. Perhaps it was just the intrigue of someone like him. She was personally familiar with more white-collar crime, but the grit and darkness of the mob, or the mafia, or whatever his father was involved in had caught her attention. y/n assumed it was like a bad case of curiosity killed the cat. y/n hadn’t turned yet as the rest moved back from the direction they had come from. She watched as Aaron turned toward the man. Aaron’s shoulders were tense beneath his jacket. She could feel that he was ill at ease. y/n caught sight of Aaron’s friend from before, Morgan, standing a few feet to the left of Aaron. She hadn’t seen him in the gloom of the night until now. It seemed that this meeting might have been planned ahead of time given the coordination. 

y/n felt someone take her hand and she looked up at Spencer. Dr. Reid didn’t say anything. He just pulled her away from the scene. The tension only seemed to grow as the group moved farther away. Spencer looked back once as he hustled y/n down the path. Whoever had joined the man who had told the group to leave gave Spencer a grateful nod before moving toward his friend. Reid chose not to look anymore, as he wrapped a protective arm around y/n’s waist and said, “I’ll drive you to your car. Mine’s in lot B anyway. Not far from the commuter lot.” y/n looked up at him again, and gave a small smile, saying, “Yeah, thanks that’d be nice.” y/n resisted the urge to say, ‘You’re a terrible liar, Spence. We both know that lot B and the commuter lot are on opposite ends of the campus’ but she kept that to herself. y/n was grateful to have a colleague like Spencer to give her rides at all. y/n quickly said goodbye to her other friends and joined Reid at the stairs that led down to the parking area with his car. y/n’s head was filled with thoughts about Aaron and what was happening back at the quad. If Aaron was going to be okay. If he had expected to be meeting that man tonight or if it was as much of a surprise to him as it had been to all of them. Given his tone, she assumed that it was a surprise to him too, but she may never be sure. 

Back in the quad, Aaron scowled. How many times had he told his father, and his father’s men over and over again to not find him in public? If he had to be dragged into some sordid affair that his dad had caused. Morgan stepped a few feet toward Aaron but Hotch raised a hand and said, “Don’t get involved Derek. I don’t expect this to be anything but some intimidation crap.” Morgan nodded and took a step back, but the built man still slipped a hand to the back pocket of his pants fingering the cool metal of his diamond back gun. Derek kept his eyes on Jeffries, one of Mr. Hotchner Sr.’s largest enforcers. Derek thought it was stupid to send Jeffries, if Mr. Hotchner wanted his son’s attention, that would not be the man he would send. 

Hotch stepped forward and said, “I don’t have anything to say to my father. He knows that so what the hell does he want with me.” Aaron was standing right next to the man. Even though Aaron was tall, he was nothing compared to Jeffries. Jeffries was a mountain of a man. Hotch was not intimidated. This man was here to threaten him physically. He was here to impose a different kind of demand on the son of the Boss. After an unsettling moment of silence, in a deep voice, one laced with the stress of a chain smoker, Jeffries said, “Mr. Hotchner Sr. wants to meet with you on Saturday at the Mercado Club. His treat.” Aaron scoffed and replied, “You think I’m going on his turf on a meeting night? God the man needs more of a grip than I thought. Jesus.” Hotch took a breath; he took a moment to look to the side, and he saw Morgan uncomfortably shuffling from one foot to the other. Aaron turned back to Jeffries and said, “You can tell my father that’s not happening. I’m out, and I don’t know how many more times I can keep telling him that.” The large man replied, “Tell him yourself on Saturday at the club. I’m not a messenger pigeon, and Aaron, this is the third time you’ve blown off your father. He’s not pleased and you know how he gets, so this isn’t a meeting I’d push off.” 

Hotch let out a big breath and gave a small nod. He wasn’t looking forward to a meeting with his old man, but whatever fuckery his dad could impose on his life wasn’t worth a half hour of animosity and argumentation about his life goals. Jeffries sensing a concession from Aaron, gave a tiny nod and moved out of the solitary spotlight and back into the darkness. As large and imposing a man as Jeffries was, he easily and quickly slipped back and away into the darkness of the campus. Aaron was so angry at having been contacted against his direct wishes. Not only had his father contacted him in public, putting his image in question, but he had done it in front of… Aaron considered what to call the people in his class. They weren’t his friends precisely, but colleagues and classmates felt a bit too dismissive. Aaron thought especially of the woman who was auditing the class. From their first meeting, he had assumed that she had no idea who he was. That rarely happened to him, though he assumed someone had filled her in after the fact. Even if that was the case, she had remained respectful and friendly toward him. Every time she or he entered the class, she would ask how he was doing with an interest that didn’t seem forced or faked. It was the first real interaction he felt like he had had in the department in years. 

Aaron thought it was rather pathetic, but looked forward to the beginning of each class just to have a few words with y/n. Hotch’s mind switched back to the present as Morgan approached him. Aaron looked over to his friend and saint, “Did you know this was going to happen?” His voice came out harsher than he intended, but Derek’s demeanor told him that his friend and pseudo-bodyguard had been more aware than he’d been. Hotch let out a scoff and said, “Unfucking believable. You should have told me and I could have walked fifteen thousand other ways back to my car.” Morgan put his hands up and said, “Listen, Hotch. I couldn’t have stopped it. And I know I stick with you more than your old man, but technically he’s still paying me to look out for you. And there are some things that even I’m not going to argue with.” Aaron could understand where Derek was coming from and he lifted a hand saying, “I get it. I’m just pissed. Now, let’s go home. I need to get wasted or something after tonight.” The pair moved together into the darkness with a sense of their friendship slightly strained. Aaron’s life was taking a turn he had desperately tried to avoid, but it seemed his family, and his past was haunting him like a ghost who just would not quit. 

y/n got home safely. She quietly moved into her room. She took a hot shower, letting the warm water steam up her small bathroom. Even though the rent was outrageous, there was the perk that each of the women had their own bathroom and shower. Her mind swelled with images of Aaron standing in front of the large man. She thought about what Emily had said about his father being the head of some sort of gang. y/n hadn’t had the time time to look into it at all. Her interactions with Aaron had all seemed pleasant and if she didn’t know about his shadowy past, she might have just thought he was some cocky young man trying to look cool with his rings and classic leather jacket. These thoughts persisted until she was in bed and eventually asleep. In the morning, y/n got dressed for a meeting with her advisor and office hours. y/n started a big pot of coffee. She knew that Em would be down in a minute because the shower upstairs had just turned off. True to form, Prentiss was down the stairs just as the coffee was finished. y/n poured her roomie a mugful, and Emily gave her a gentle smile. The brunette in her police uniform with cuffs, and gun and all. As the woman drank their liquid breakfast, y/n’s brain flashed to last night and she asked, “Hey Emily. What kind of gang is Aaron’s father the leader of? There was some threatening guy on campus last night. It seems he was there to talk to Aaron or something.” 

Hearing this, Em’s ears perked up. She had been trying for two years to impress her supervisor. She had gone above and beyond in terms of the effort and hours she put in on the street. She picked up shifts and did the jobs no one wanted. And all her efforts had been for naught. She was still in her entry-level position and had crappy entry-level pay. At this point, Emily was looking at anything to try and get a step ahead of all the other men in the department. She had started looking at stalled cases or those that were backlogged at the department. One of those cases was the Hotchner crime ring. The thought of a new lead had Emily on her toes. Prentiss was excited but also realized that y/n could have also been in a degree of danger. Emily thought about her words before she said, “Well, from my research and knowledge of the gang activity in the area, I can tell you this, Mr. Hotchner Sr. isn’t running some West Side Story turf gang. The man is in deep. His gang is a criminal organization. I’d say that it was closer to the mafia than a gang, but he doesn’t have quite that much influence yet. If the department would only spend a few more dollars looking into that group, they’d easily find more than they have now. Honestly, it’s infuriating.” 

This was all news to y/n. She wasn’t versed in any of the things that Emily was talking about. There was a moment of silence before Prentiss said, “So the guy you saw, the one that spoke to Aaron, did you hear any of that conversation? Did you see the man at all?” y/n shook her head no and replied, “Not really. Aaron told us to leave another way. I can tell you the guy was big, but I couldn’t see him very well. He was weathering a suit, but that’s about it.” Em nodded and took another thoughtful sip of her coffee. When she set the cup down, she said, not to anyone in particular, “I swear gangs and drugs are ruining this city and the cops aren’t doing a thing about it.” 

Just as Emily said this, Garcia entered the room. She was dressed in her normal eccentric style. She had star decals on her face and wore a bubble gum pink lip. From the blonde's energy, it was hard to tell if she was just coming back from an all-nighter or just heading out for brunch. y/n asked the clarifying question, “Pen, you just getting in or going out?” Garcia beamed and said, “I just had a lovely night out. Club, club, another club, and then my friend JJ’s house. You’d both like her I think. Now what did I hear about gangs and drugs? You’re not planning on locking me up, are you Emily?” Prentiss laughed at this and said, “Garcia, you’re forgetting that Lexaporo and Adderal are prescription medications. Unless you’re selling your pills on the side of the road, you’re scott-free in my book.” 

That had all of them laughing. Penelope, after getting a cup of coffee, did ask genuinely, “But really what gangs are you talking about?” Emily looked over to y/n and said, “Well Aaron, the ‘bad boy’ in y/n’s class had a run-in with one of his father’s associates on campus last night. Tense affair.” Garcia’s eyes went wide and she said, “From what I’ve heard about the Hotchner group from my friends and fellow hackers they aren’t to be trifled with. Let’s hope Aaron’s father doesn’t want anything serious with his son.” y/n frowned at hearing this. She had never assumed that Aaron’s circumstances were easy. Clearly, from the class's perception of him, they weren’t, but an actual threat of harm or violence to her classmate set her nerves on edge in a way she had not anticipated. However, the time on the clock on the wall caught y/n’s attention. She needed to leave to make her appointment with a student struggling with grades. y/n burned her mouth as she chugged her coffee and said, “Sorry, gotta run ladies. See you both tonight!” With that, she grabbed her backpack and purse and dashed out the door and toward her car. For the rest of the busy day, y/n forgot about Aaron Hotchner, but she would be reminded of him again soon enough. For now, there were the problems of today to solve. 

For Aaron the week went by both shockingly fast and maddeningly long. Time felt like it was playing a sick prank on him as he waited for Saturday night. Hotch went to his normal classes and studied as much as he could given the circumstances. He did shockingly well given the circumstances. Finally, Saturday arrived and Aaron and Morgan drove toward the Mercado Club on the far East side of town. The club was packed. Saturday nights were disco nights with drinks half off. This ensured that the large space was always packed for meeting nights in the more private backroom of the establishment. Morgan had a designated spot on the street and parallel parked between two of the gang member's cars. As Morgan stopped the car, he grabbed Aaron’s shoulder and said, “Listen, man, don’t make this hard on yourself. How many times has Richard done this to you? Know know what he’s gonna do to you if you say no again, so just… just think about it before you say no. If you make me wash blood out of these leather seats again, I’m making you pay for it this time.” 

Derek said this out of a genuine concern for his friend. Morgan had seen this song and dance before and the look in Aaron’s eyes told him that it would be the same old result. After all, money didn’t matter to Hotch. He had more money than he needed, even if he didn’t want to admit it. The fifty dollars it cost to clean or even redetail Morgan’s car didn’t matter to the older Hotchner sibling. Derek wished it did, for his friend's sake. But he had said his peace, and he couldn’t stop Aaron from walking out of the car with a determined stride. Derek followed quickly after Aaron. 

Aaron, clad in his normal leather jacket moved into the club. He had access to the service entry which led to quieter corridors and direct access to the gang's private meeting room. Aaron, however, refused to use his key and elbowed his way through the thick crowd of dancers and revelers. After about five minutes, he made it to the back corridors and toward the club room. Unceremoniously Aaron, and shortly after, Derek, moved into the crowded room. All eyes of the gang members moved to the two new additions to the room. Richard Hotchner, seated at the center of the room raised a hand and quieted the room. Mr. Hotchner Sr. said, “Good of you to join us, gentlemen. Take a seat and we’ll continue the meeting. There were only two extra chairs open in the room. One was in the back and the room. It was clear that Aaron was to take the seat next to his father. Hotch did as expected and sat next to his father. The young man could have laughed at the scene. It felt like something out of The Godfather, except he knew what was coming once the meeting was over. The meeting which covered Hotchern Sr.’s continued plan to spread drugs and gain ground throughout the East and West sides of town seemed to go on forever. Aaron listened as each sector spoke and gave updates with half interest. His father’s criminal activities and need for power and control were the juxtaposition of the life that Aaron hoped to build for himself. He had seen the real pain that his father had not only inflicted on his men, but on the community the gang encompassed as a whole. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t seem to escape his father's control. 

After another hour and a half, the meeting adjourned as Richard raised a hand. Everyone, including Derek, stood and left the room; that was, except for Aaron. Once the whole gang was out, two large men entered the room. One was Jeffries, the other was another security man just as big and intimidating as Jeffries. Richard looked at his son and said, “You know what I’m going to say already.” Hotch sighed and replied, “And you know my response, Dad.” Richard sighed and said, “Every time we have one of these meetings I pray for a Prodigal Son, but I get a Cain instead. But either way, this is in your blood boy and you can’t fight it forever.” By ‘In your blood’ Aaron knew that his father meant, ‘You will take responsibility for my criminal organization. To take the reigns and make it bigger and better than ever before.’ \

At this comment, Aaron said, “Fuck my blood, and fuck you too.” Almost instantaneously after this remark, Hotch’s face was thrown to the side due to a harsh slap to the side of his face. Aaron leveled a glare at his father and managed to say, “Have me beaten black and blue again Dad. It’s not gonna change my mind. I’m never joining you.” Richard shook his head and replied, “You asked for it. And one day, one day it’s gonna work son. Just you wait.” With that, Richard stood and motioned for the two security guards to do as Mr. Hotchner Sr. wanted. Outside the room, Derek stood and listened to the sounds of violence and brutality that were happening inside the space he had just been sitting in. Morgan cringed as the rhythmic sound of fist against flesh continued. The occasional grunt from Aaron cut through the sound of violence. 

After around a half hour, the two large men dragged the barely conscious body of Aaron from the room. Morgan did nothing to stop them. He just followed after them as they dragged Hotch’s body down the quiet hallway. Aaron was unceremoniously dropped down the two concrete stairs to the back entrance of the club. Morgan flushed his body to the railing as Jeffries and the other man moved back inside. Once the security detail was inside, Derek rushed forward toward Aaron’s prone figure. Hotch muttered incoherently against the concrete as Morgan lifted his friend up and toward his car. Derek thought, ‘Yup, it’s gonna be another interior cleaning job tomorrow,’ as he hauled Aaron’s bloodied body toward his parked car. 

Morgan lifted Aaron into the passenger seat and buckled him in. Hotch made a whimpering sound as he was jostled for a moment. Derek, though he was paid by Richard, cared more for his employer's son than he would like to admit. They had built up a pretty strong friendship over the years they had known each other. It had been tense at first because Aaron didn’t want and resented having a bodyguard. This was when he was still in high school and Richard was in some hot water with both the FBI and another gang that was trying to recruit some of his men. Morgan was already a member of the gang and was a loyal member given how young he was. It was only natural that he guard Aaron from any unwanted attention and keep the Boss’s son out of trouble. 

Aaron was, at the time full of anger from recently losing his mother and was making reckless choices for himself and the gang. He had hated Morgan, but the man had pulled him out of some bad situations numerous times over the years. The more time they spent together, the more Hotch sympathized with Morgan. Not in the awkward pitying type of way that many had when Derek was asked to open up, like in counseling centers or at one disastrous youth program he had been sent to. No. Aaron understood why Morgan had turned to a gang for security, and community too. Even if it was a bad community. One rooted in violence and illegality. Derek had to chalk it up to the fact that Aaron’s father was the leader. Aaron had to have seen to full spectrum of reasons for people to join a gang. And a full spectrum of violence as well. The beating Aaron had received tonight was no different than any other except that Richard hadn’t joined in. This was another thing he and Hotch had in common. The first time Aaron had taken his shirt off in front of Morgan, it had been after a workout or something, Derek had been shocked to see a smearing of dark purple and yellow bruises mottling the man’s skin. Morgan had asked if a group and jumped him, but Aaron’s response of, “I only got jumped by someone I know. Don’t worry about it.” It wasn’t until weeks later that Morgan saw Richard strike his son, and suddenly it all made more sense. Then Morgan felt sympathy for Aaron as well. After they came to more of an understanding, Hotch had stood up for Morgan against his father a few times and that had sealed their friendship. Morgan rode as smoothly as he could back to their apartment, with just the radio playing some rap on a low level and Aaron’s labored breathing for company. 

The next Monday, y/n arrived at class just on time. She was surprised to see that Aaron wasn’t in his normal seat. She did shoot Parker and Steven a smile as she pulled out her notes as the lecturer began. During the break, y/n moved to the ladies room. Midterms were fast approaching and almost everyone in the class was huddled up making study plans. y/n had already made her study plan with her friends in the class. As she washed her hands she heard a pained sound coming from the men’s room which was just a wall away from the women’s restrooms. y/n quickly wiped her hands free of water and moved outside. There was no one in the hallway and she got close to the door of the men's room and called out, “Hey, um… are you okay in there?” There was a pause and then a little grunt as someone from inside said, “I'm fine.” The voice was familiar, but there was a lisp in it which was making it hard to pinpoint. There were still another twenty minutes to the break, and y/n was interested to see who was suffering in the bathroom and stood leaning against the wall. After around five minutes the door opened and she looked up. Aaron Hotchner was the last person she expected to see limp out of the bathroom. y/n’s eyes widened as she looked at his face which was bruised on the left side. His lips were also split on the top and the bottom. Without thinking much y/n said, “Jesus Christ. What happened to you?” Hotch’s eyes snapped to her. He hadn’t thought anyone was outside. He had been stranding himself in the bathroom for longer than he had thought. He wasn’t sure why he had even come to campus in the first place. It wasn’t like he could go to class like this. Or perhaps he was toying with the idea he would go to class. To make his life harder, or to give his classmates something to talk about, or because he just couldn’t care anymore he wasn’t sure, but y/n had caught him off guard. Her use of expletives for one and the genuine concern on her face as she looked him over with an intense stare. 

Aaron thought of fleeing for a moment. Of running, or limping down the hall as fast as he could, but he realized that he needed help. Help from someone not so invested in him as the son of a gangster and criminal. If that was anyone in the class, it was y/n. As the sound of the lecture room door opened, Aaron moved quickly. He grabbed y/n’s wrist and pulled her into a hallway and then left into another hallway. This one was less lit. Half of the fluorescent bulbs in the hallway seemed to be out and those that were functioning flickered rather ominously. The turn of events had happened so quickly that y/n didn’t say anything until they were stopped in the hallway when y/n said, “Aaron, what’s going on? What happened to you?” 

The original concern was still in her voice, but there was an added edge including a hint of fear for herself. She looked around the space as if expecting something or someone to pop out of a doorway or darkened corner. Aaron took a deep breath and said, “Listen. Sorry for being so abrupt. I don’t even know why I’m here really and I’m sure I’m going to get an earful from Dr. Porter when I come back next week, but I saw you and I thought… well I thought I’d ask a favor, even if I don’t deserve one.” Hotch’s left eyebrow was cocked and y/n listened for him for a minute as if he was speaking a foreign language. She snapped back to herself as her watch beeped the five minutes before class started again. y/n asked, “What’s the favor?” Aaron seemed to breathe a sigh of relief and said, “Can I get your notes from today’s class before next week?” You could fax them to me or I could get them from your tomorrow in your office or something? I’d understood if you said no. It’s just that I really can’t fall behind in this class.” 

There was a very short silence as y/n considered. She didn’t have a lot of time to think because she needed to get back to class, like, now. Two thoughts ran through her head. The first was from the more rational and logical part of her brain. The part that Emily would agree with. It said, ‘Ma’am, look at him right now. Something bad happened here and I don’t think he just tripped on the library stairs. It probably has to do with his family or gang involvement or something. Don’t. Be. Stupid.’ But the other part of her brain said, ‘Look at him. That’s gotta hurt and those cuts and bruises were a few days old which meant they had hurt more back then.’ Going against her logical brain she said, “Yeah. I’ll give you my notes. She rummaged around in her purse pulled out an old receipt and pen and jotted down her home number. She handed him the slip of paper and said, “Here’s my number. Call me later and we can coordinate a meeting time.” 

She had just seen the contents of her bag and she noticed that there was an ibuprofen in there along with an assortment of random stuff. She asked, “Have you had any painkillers recently?” Aaron’s eyes snapped back to her. He looked surprised that she was still talking to him. He looked back to the ground and said, “It’s been like three hours now or something.” y/n pulled out the bottle and undid the cap quickly. She really needed to get back to class and she rushed to tip two tablets into her hand. She closed the bottle and half-pressed the pills into Aaron’s hand. She said, “Call me later,” and then ran back to the lecture. The lecture was in full swing when she got back and y/n noticed that she was about five minutes late. She tried her best to slip into the room. At least she sat at the very back, but her tardy return had a few of the guys in suits and one or two girls in the class giving her the stink eye. 

Dr. Porter also glanced at her, but it was brief before he returned to talking. The rest of the class, y/n had conflicting emotions. The first of which was that she felt bad for being late. Dr. Porter had taken a risk on her, and she was probably letting him down. The other thought she had was if she had made a catastrophic mistake in waiting to see who had been in the men’s restroom. She knew that Em would say she was stupid for getting involved, and part of her agreed, but when she had seen the normally cocky and confidant Aaron Hotchner in such a state, she had let her emotions get the best of her. She pondered if that was her fatal flaw or not. y/n did her best to push away these thoughts and focus on the lecture. If all else failed, she could just ignore Aaron’s call. Little did y/n know that getting involved with Hotch would do much more than cause her stress in Tax Fraud. 

The class progressed as it normally would with just a hint of awkwardness. Dr. Porteer did call her, but her response was coherent and she defended her point about the verdict in the U.S. v Ofshe case and how the drugs that had been obtained and the oversimplification of the government violated the defendant's Fifth Amendment rights. After she had spoken a ghost of a smile graced Dr. Porter’s face. He was happy with her response. If y/n was anything, it was thorough. 

When the class ended everyone filed out of the room, and y/n approached Porter. Parker finished asking a 1uqtion quickly and moved out of the room, patting y/n on the shoulder as they left. y/n and Dr. Porter were alone and y/n said, “I’m sorry for being late after the break. Something, personal, came up. I didn’t expect it to take that long.” Dr. Porter looked at her, a hint of concern in the crinkles at the corner of his eyes. He asked, “Is everything alright, y/l/n?” y/n let out a sigh realizing that saying anything was opening avenues to conversations that she might not want to elaborate on. To keep Aaron’s situation private, she simply said, “Well it’s not me that’s having the problems, It’s a friend of mine. They’ve gotten themself into some trouble and I just needed to check in to make sure they were okay. Porter nodded but didn’t look convinced,  and said, “Alright. Well if you ever need anything, or feel overwhelmed with all that you’re juggling this semester, you can always email me or see me during office hours.” y/n smiled warmly and said, “Thanks. Dr. Porter. That means a lot to me.” The older man gave her arm an affectionate squeeze before letting her go for the night. 

The drive home was peaceful,  serene even. It juxtaposed the earlier moment of tension from that evening. y/n hoped to stay relaxed for the rest of the night. Just do some reading, have a glass of wine, a very hot shower, and hit the bed. Her hopes for calm and quietude were crushed when she got into the apartment and Emily was leaning against the kitchen counter with a deep frown on her face. Before y/n even had the chance to ask, “What’s wrong, Prentiss?” The strong-minded brunette said, “You’re ‘friend’ called about five minutes ago.” This stopped y/n in her tracks. y/n knew that Emily was talking about Aaron, and she was about to get an earful. She steadied herself as her roommate started saying, “y/n, Aaron Hotchner is not the type of guy you want to get tangled up with, okay? I might sound nice and charming and play-act as a ‘bad boy,’ but there is nothing good about him or his family. Promise me you’re not going to be so stupid as to meet up with him and give him your notes. What if he starts expecting things from you? Have you ever thought about that scary moment on campus last week?” 

y/n while taking the verbal reprimand hadn’t thought about the fact that Aaron’s injuries could be related to that event on campus. Had something bad happened to him after Spencer had dragged her away? Although y/n realized that Aaron might have been in a serious and dangerous situation, that didn’t stop her from still being concerned for him. In some small way, y/n was annoyed that Em was so tied into her personal life. So what if she wanted to give Aaron her notes? But the logical part of her brain stopped her from snapping back. y/n took a deep breath and said, “I see where you’re coming from Em. But, he looked so hurt tonight. Desperate. If giving him my notes in a public place, like the coffee shop is a crime, then so be it. I told him I would, and I’m one to keep my promises.” y/n expected some sort of reprimand, but instead, Em sighed and said, “Fine. Call him back. I left his number on the pad on the fridge. But for the love of god, either have me. Garcia, or Spence come with you whenever you meet him?” y/n smiled and said, “Thanks Em. I knew you were a softie under that hard shell of yours.” 

Em scoffed and said, “Well I might be a softie for you. Aaron Hotchner is another matter entirely. At least with you knowing him, I can snoop in on his life. You never know, maybe he’ll give you a hint about his dad and you can pass that info over to me.” y/n rolled her eyes and said, “Whatever you say Em. Now let me call him back. Buffy’s coming on in a half hour and I don’t plan on missing another episode. Do you wanna join? There’s a bottle of red in the fridge we can share?” Emily nodded and said, “You bet. I’ll get the channel pulled up while you talk to your boyfriend.” That comment had y/n rolling her eyes again, but she didn’t say anything as she moved into the kitchen. 

As Prentiss had said, there was a note on the notepad stuck to the fridge that read ‘A.H.’s Number,’ and then a list of seven digits. The phone hung to the left of the fridge. It was egg yolk yellow, a design choice that y/n still didn’t understand as the rest of the kitchen was a pale blue with white accents. Ignoring the contrasting colors of the kitchen, y/n tapped on the phone number and held the receiver to her ear as the dial tone beeped. After the second ring someone answered, but it wasn’t Aaron. The low, husky voice said, “This is Morgan. Who is it?” y/n paused for a second before replying, “Um, this is y/n. y/l/n. I’m calling for Aaron. I’m in his Tax Fraud class, and he wanted my notes from today? I was just trying to arrange a meeting.” y/n stopped talking. She felt like she had said too much, or maybe not enough. The silence was awkward and lingered. Finally, Derek who had mercifully pulled the phone away from his mouth called out, “Hotch, a girl’s on the phone for you.” After a moment, Derek  said, “He’ll be here in a minute.” Then there was silence again. y/n tried to think about where she knew Morgan from. The voice wasn’t wholly new. She had scant few encounters with Aaron and she tried to pinpoint each of them in her mind. The night last week came to mind and she thought of the other man that had been with Aaron as Spencer had pulled her away. She assumed this was the same guy. She pinned the name, Morgan in her head in case she ever needed it. 

She had no clue why she would ever need it, but it couldn’t hurt. After another minute there was more sound, a muffled conversation, and a small grunt before the phone clicked a bit and Aaron’s familiar voice tapped in on the line. He said, “Hey, y/n. Sorry I was out back. Thanks for doing this by the way.” y/n nodded and said, “Yeah. No problem. So my schedule is pretty full this week but I can do Wednesday morning, Thursday in the evening, or Saturday morning. Does one of those times work for you?” Aaron replied, “Saturday works for me. Any place work for you? I can come over or we can meet anywhere that works for you really.” y/n didn’t hesitate as she said, “Let’s do the coffee shop near West campus. You can come and copy my stuff while I grade or read or something.” 

There was a softy, nearly inaudible breath before Hotch said, “It’s a date. Is 9:00 a.m. too early for you?” y/n replied, “Nope. Nine is good. See you then.” Hotch replied, “Right on. See ya then.” Then he disconnected the call. y/n did the same. y/n sighed, again questioning why exactly she was doing what she was. Was it care, curiosity, or a little of both? She couldn’t pinpoint it in her mind. There was also the fact that Aaron had said, “‘It’s a date’” in an infuriating manner. Like he knew that was going to spark some kind of response. Of course, it was a joke, but even so, it irked her because it was working. 

y/n let out a sigh of frustration. She looked up at the clock and realized that she needed to grab the glasses and wine as Buffy would be starting soon. Just as the new episode started. Emily and y/n settled in and just like clockwork, Garcia came down from her room. The charming Pen shuffled into the room and sat down on the couch. y/n knew her third roommate would be down once the show started and had already poured a glass for her. Em was looking at y/n as if asking, ‘So, when are you meeting him?’ And Garcia was looking at Emily as if asking, ‘What’s going on? Why do you have that look on your face?’ Thankfully Buffy was the silencing buffer. None of them dared talk during the episode. It was that important to them. The group's shared love of the campy monster of the week show drew them together in a funny way. In the beginning, y/n thought she was too much of a nerd for Prentiss, but it turned out even the dedicated policewoman couldn’t be turned down by Angel and Spike's charm. They would have to debrief once the commercials started in ten minutes or so, but for now, there was a calm as they all sat in front of the TV. 

The week went by quickly. y/n’s advisor got sick on Wednesday night and emailed her saying that he wouldn’t be able to make it to their Thursday morning meeting. This opened up her morning and she planned to sleep in. That was the plan at least. However, at 7:30 a.m. a knock on her door woke her. y/n was groggy as she made her way to her door. A sharp crack of thunder and lightning had her come more to her senses. It was pouring cats and dogs. y/n rubbed her eyes as she opened the door to the hall light. Emily was standing outside in her uniform. y/n asked sleepily, “What is it Em?” Prentiss bit her bottom lip and said, “My car won’t start. Engine problems. Can I borrow your keys or can you give me a ride to the station? The brunette looked embarrassed to ask, but y/n understood her predicament and said, “Yeah I got you. Let me put on a bra and some pants.” In under ten minutes, the duo were out the door. y/n drove slowly and carefully. The rain continued to pour down. y/n felt a small feeling of dread in the air. As they got to the station, y/n said, “Just give me or Garcia a call when you need to be picked up if you don’t get a ride from your co-workers, okay?” Em nodded and said, “Thanks a million. y/n you’re a lifesaver.” y/n got back into her car and drove to campus. Even though she didn’t have an umbrella, she got half-soaked walking to her office, and Mary Janes squeaked awfully on the floor. In her office, y/n sat down in front of a stack of papers, half of them her students and the other half her own. There was a loud crash of thunder and y/n looked out the window when she saw a dark hooded figure standing outside her office in the downpour. She couldn’t see the person's face in the beating rain. A sound in the hallway caught her attention for a moment. Another pair of noisy shoes. By the time she looked back out of the window, the figure was gone. She shook her head wondering if she’d made up the man. She let the thought pass as she kept working late into the night. 

Emily did end up calling y/n and letting her know that Penelope had picked her up already. y/n was grateful for this. She was exhausted from her day and early morning. She quickly packed up the work that she was taking home with her and switched off the lights and lamps in her office. The rain had stopped hours ago, but it left the ground damp and mist and humidity rose off the earth like a dense fog. y/n got into her car and drove toward home. She took a shortcut to avoid a traffic light that was out. As her headlight illuminated a dark back alleyway behind a store, y/n saw for a moment the same figure from earlier that day. They were leaning over something else. ‘Is that a body?’ y/n stalled, startled like a dear in headlights, even though it was the reverse scenario. For a second y/n made eye contact with the person, and she distinctly saw blood on their mouth, staining their chin a gruesome red. y/n’s heart stopped beating and a moment later a loud honk from behind her shocked her. y/n was blinded by the bright lights behind her. She had not seen the sedan pull up behind her car. In a panicked state, she hit the accelerator and finished her drive home terrified of what she’d just seen. 

y/n rushed into the house and found Emily at the stove. Prentiss turned and her, “Welcome home” died on her lips as she saw her friend. Em turned off the fire under her boiling potatoes and asked, “y/n, are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” y/n swallowed trying to get some saliva back into her mouth and throat. She raised her and said in a hoarse voice, “I think I just saw a murder.” Emily’s jaw went slack for a second before she moved forward, police-like, and said, “Okay, y/n. You could have seen anything. It’s dark and gloomy out there.” y/n shook her head and said, “No, Em. Whatever I saw it was bad. I could feel it in my core.” Prentiss nodded, taking y/n seriously, the only one who would for a few days at least. She said, “Okay, y/n. Tell me everything. Think about things as clearly as possible. Don’t try and fill in any gaps, just tell me what you saw.” 

An hour later with Em trying to jog y/n’s memory to get the best information and writing down all the little and big details in her police pad, Prentiss said, “I’ll leave early tomorrow morning and check it out, y/n. Before I head to the station.” y/n’s eyes widened and she protested, “Shouldn’t we look now? There could be someone dying out there.” Emily dropped her eyes and sighed replying, “No, y/n. If what you say is true, then there’s nothing I can do tonight. I’d need more men, dogs, a whole setup.” After a pause Prentiss added, “And, y/n. There is no we in this. It’s dangerous. It’s safest for you to pretend you didn’t see anything tonight. Forget about it and don’t tell anyone.” y/n was frustrated by this response. However, she knew Em was correct. What could she do? Before y/n had a chance to say she was going to bed, Emily said, “Who are you bringing with you to meet Hotchner again?” 

y/n said in an almost deadpan voice, “Reid.” Emily frowned and said, “y/n, I’m going with you for that. I don’t trust Hotchner.” y/n’s head whipped up and she said, “Emily, it’s not like you can just stroll in there with Spence, and I. If Aaron and his family are as smart and powerful as you say, then he’ll know you’re a cop. I don’t think he’ll love that and I do still have to show up to a class with him, and sit across from him for the rest of the semester.” Prentiss could see y/n’s discomfort and replied, “I get it, y/n. And I know you’re trying to be nice, but I don’t want you going alone, and no, I don’t count Reid. I won’t walk in with you, and I won’t talk to you at all, but I will go and just keep an eye out.” y/n rubbed her tired eyes, saying, “Okay, Prentiss. We can talk about it tomorrow. I just want to go to bed now.” Em didn’t try and stop y/n as she moved past her and upstairs. y/n stripped out of her clothes from the day and fell into bed. She’d try and convince Em that she was a big girl tomorrow and didn’t need a bodyguard, but she was asleep before she could think of what she would say. y/n tossed and turned as she dreamed of the man outside her window and the person she’d seen with blood on their mouth, looking into her soul.

Text Break Banne by @cafekitsune

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[idontknowreallywhy]

Teeth 2

Thursday Dad!Scott commute fic time

Ok this is actually the product of two commutes and I posted a little of it before, but the unedited sprint write rule applies to the latter half. I might tidy it up later, it’s a bit rambling… but as it’s based on the thoughts of an inexperienced parent in the middle of the night maybe that’s appropriate!

It’s Scott’s side of this story and is meant to mirror it but forgive me if I’ve got events a bit in the wrong order…

❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙

Scott’s body made it to the hallway before he was even aware he was awake. He skidded to a halt and stood for a moment, one eye still glued shut with sleep, but breathing fast, heart pounding and tried to work out what had activated his internal alarm. He rubbed his face hard and listened intently.

Ok… there were no unusual sounds right now. What had it been?

He staggered to the top of the stairs, was someone down there? He was sure he’d locked up properly but… He held his breath… no noises came from down there… and surely a burglar couldn’t remain that quiet for long.

Just as well. His left foot was half asleep, his elbow was vigorously objecting to the way he’d bounced off the doorframe and pretty much everything was still blurry… he wasn’t going to be much use against an intruder right now. He rubbed his face. Then his elbow. Then his foot.

Maybe it had just been a dream?

Alright. He’d check everyone was alright then go and collapse into bed again.

Heart still pounding furiously he hobbled down the corridor, irritably shaking the tingly foot every other step. And then he heard it…

A whimper.

His eyes widened in realisation. Gordon had been ill! Idiot, Tracy! Should have thought of that first. He hurried towards the room the Tinies shared and slapped Virgil’s door as he passed. He didn’t know what time the kid had last been dosed up as Virg had been the one keeping track.

Taking a breath and listening at the door he could hear quiet sobs and his heart squeezed painfully.

Gently pushing the door ajar his right eye was accosted by a yellow nightlight glow while the left was warmed by red. He picked his way through discarded toys and books, smothering a yelp when his bare toes found something distinctly slimy… what on Earth?! Best not to think about it. That was tomorrow’s problem.

But what was tonight’s problem? Scott stood for a moment in the orangey no-man’s land and held his breath, listening for two sets of lungs in action. The inhabitant of the yellow zone appeared to be sleeping peacefully, if snoring in a somewhat congested fashion. The other was also breathing… very fast. VERY fast. Alan!!

In his haste he became entangled in floor-duvet and only narrowly avoided crippling himself on a rogue Lego brick hidden beneath, but somehow Scott managed to reach the bed without permanent injury and lower himself carefully to sit beside the sweaty, shaking ball of sadness.

What now? Was he asleep? Was it nightmares or night terrors? Should he wake him or would that make it worse? He vaguely recalled someone saying something about not waking a kid with night terrors but how was he supposed to know the difference?! He dithered for a few seconds - why was there nothing on this any of the parenting books he’d frantically skimmed since finding himself standing in for a lost mother and an absent father? Did people just figure this stuff out or was he missing some kind of instinct that should make him certain of what to do?

Alan flinched and sobbed and Scott couldn’t bear it anymore. Throwing caution to the wind, he scooped his brother into his arms and rocked him and murmured reassuring nonsense. This seemed to have been the right call because Alan clung to him and started yammering away incoherently. After a brief panic about brain damage Scott identified the problem with his little brother’s diction and removed the drool and snot coated teddy from his mouth. Ugh. Must remember to wash that, it was probably harbouring multiple diseases.

Not that Alan was making a huge amount more sense now he was able to pronounce consonants. Scott listened hard and racked his brain as to what the kid could possibly be talking about… he was being bitten? Did they have bedbugs? Fleas? Spiders? Alligators?

Wait, what?

Yes Alan was wailing about alligators and clutching his shins and suddenly Scott was a little kid again, trying and failing not to cry on his Mom as she explained his legs weren’t being stabbed by invisible knives. Growing pains. That must be it. Ok. He had a probable diagnosis but what on earth did he do about it? He took hold of Alan’s cold, skinny little legs and rubbed them, hoping the sensation would be a distraction if nothing else. Maybe if he warmed them up… hang on…

Warmth! Yes that was it!

Right on cue, Virgil poked his bleary face around the door and Scott mouthed instructions at him. It took four attempts but finally he seemed to cotton on and disappeared again.

In the meantime, Scott wrapped himself around Alan and hummed Mom’s lullaby - the only thing he could ever think of in times of crisis and luckily a tune that Alan and Gordon seemed to be soothed by. One of the many little ways she was still with them. He glanced up at the photograph of her the Tinies had in pride of place in the middle of the wall… in the neutral zone. The one thing they shared.

Unseen, he nodded a greeting and did his best to return her ever-present smile.

An amount of time passed in which Scott’s eyes grew heavy and he mildly head-butted his little brother a couple of times. Finally the cavalry known as Virg appeared with Calpol, a warmed wheat bag and a distinctly more wakeful expression. Caffeine had clearly been applied. Scott should probably do something about that particular habit of his brother’s but figured there were worse things he could be getting into so settled for rolling his eyes. Virgil had raised his eyebrows with a clear offer but Scott shook his head. He had a couple of hours before he needed to get up and sort out breakfasts and school bags so he hoped maybe he could catch a little bit of shut eye before then.

Pain killers and warmth applied, Virgil repeated his vanishing act. Scott grabbed the duvet off the floor, giving it a shake to even out the lumpy filling and, at the expression on Alan’s face made a show of a thorough check for gators or monsters or whatever he was worried about. Reassurance delivered he dragged the covers over the both of them and managed maybe two lines of the lullaby before Alan was snoring softly.

Suddenly wide awake, Scott lay there with his mind overflowing with anxiety. He worried about Alan losing sleep, about Gordy’s ear infection. He worried about whether they had enough bread left for sandwiches. About whether Virgil was doing terrible things to himself with all the coffee. He worried about John’s friendship troubles and how Scott could help when he refused to talk about it. He worried about how on earth he was supposed to manage any of this when he hadn’t the first clue how to be a proper grown up.

Forcing himself to breathe slowly he squinted up at Mom’s photo and she grinned down at him through the orange haze. He did his best to smile back and then he closed his eyes and hummed the lullaby to himself. She had believed in him so he tried to believe in himself. Maybe he’d just do his best to copy what she had done and hopefully… hopefully he wouldn’t go too far wrong.

❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙

[heliza24]

The Radical Act of Quitting (and Wilhelm)

This is a little more personal than my Young Royals metas normally are. It’s really one-half personal essay, one-half show analysis.  It’s something of a spiritual successor to my post about radical acceptance and Simon’s arc in season 2. And it’s also about the reasons why I want Wilhelm to renounce the crown by the end of season 3. (I am stating that early, because I know many people disagree. Feel free to engage but please do so with kindness; a lot of this is quite vulnerable for me.)

I’m disabled. Specifically, I have a chronic condition that began in my early twenties, and slowly got worse and worse until I was finally diagnosed at 28. I’m 31 now, and I’ve had to grieve the person I once was many times over. I used to be a dancer, I used to be an adventurous eater, I used to love to travel. My chronic pain and restrictive medical diet have taken those things away from me, piece by piece. But the thing I mainly want to talk about right now is quitting my job. At the time of my diagnosis, I had worked at my job full time for three years. For a few years after my diagnosis, I tried to remain at my job part-time, because I loved it. I worked in the music industry, and I had the best team of coworkers. I had a great work/life balance, I was never stressed about work. I looked forward to each day in the office. When I went to events and had to introduce myself during an ice-breaker, I would usually include a fact about my job. I found a lot of my identity there. All of my work directly supported musicians, which was something I was very proud of.

So I tried very, very hard to hang on to my job. My company gave out these ridiculously heavy plaques for employees who had been at the company for 5 years, and I was determined to get one. But it was really hard. I could no longer type sitting up for more than a few minutes, so I did every day from my lap desk in bed. (This is still where I write all of my fic and meta!) I struggled to talk to customers on the phone while I was in pain. The office was closed because of the pandemic, but I would have had to work from home regardless because I couldn’t handle the commute.  Every day was a slog. And my pain and fatigue weren’t getting better. In fact they were continuing to get worse as time went on. Finally, my five-year work anniversary arrived. I made it, but I felt like a runner barely stumbling over the finish line. It was the end of 2021. I talked with my friends and my therapist and my disability benefits lawyer. “I don’t think I can keep working,” I would say. And then I would cry, because the thought of letting go of this last part of my identity, when my illness had already taken so much, was so horrible.

After several months of deliberating and grieving, I quit.  My boss begged me to reconsider (God bless him, honestly). Was there anything he could do to better accommodate my needs? Could I work a different schedule to let me sleep more? Could I work freelance on specific projects they really needed me on? I wanted to say yes so badly. But I knew. The longer I held on, the more I fought, the worse my health would become. And the worse my health would become, the more I would struggle with work. The joy I had felt during my first three years in that office had already drained away. I was fighting just to get through each day, and I didn’t want to fight anymore.

I recognize that having the resources and disability benefits to even consider quitting is a huge privilege. There are a lot of disabled and chronically ill folks who struggle through work at great detriment to their health because they can’t afford not to keep working.  So I recognize how lucky I was to be able to quit. I am so grateful for that option, even as I mourn all the things I have lost.

In my meta about Simon, I talked about radical acceptance and how it has been my guiding light as a disabled person. Embracing radical acceptance means that I have done my best to accept what I can and cannot do, and what I can and cannot control, without judgment. I accepted that I needed to walk away from my job. But how was I supposed to define myself without it?

Capitalism defines most peoples’ self-identity, whether they realize it or not. We identify with our jobs, or with the “grind” culture, or with the moral goodness associated with working hard. But here I was, without a job. And I had my whole adult life ahead of me. I had to find a way to make a new identity outside of work.

Around this time, I started to gravitate towards stories where characters are faced with similar decisions, even if I didn’t realize it yet. And let me tell you, there aren’t many of them.

@bluedalahorse and I talk about this a lot. In our ultra-franchised world, the point of stories, even those that are supposedly about rebellions, is often to return characters to the status quo, so that the next movie/comic/episode can pick back up where the last one left off. And when there is a significant change in the status quo, it is usually because the characters worked, and pushed, and struggled to achieve that change. It’s very rare to see a story about someone who walked away from something that was harming them. It’s rarer still to find something that deals with the aftermath, as characters work to re-establish themselves.

I’ve found a lot of comfort in true stories of people leaving cults and high demand religions, and of queer people forced to leave their conservative families behind. In all of these cases, people are consciously abandoning a predominant belief system that is harming them, and have to start over as they craft their new sense of identity. (I am also queer, which adds an additional level of connection). Often people in these situations come to rely on their found family, a thing I have also found to be true in my own life.

I quit my job in between seasons 1 and 2 of Young Royals, and I don’t think I realized how many themes connected my experience to Wilhelm’s until I was watching season 2. Wilhelm is the protagonist of Young Royals, and his central dramatic question has always been: will he fulfill his duty as a royal? Or will he quit, and discover who he is beyond the system he was raised in? Simon is a huge part of this decision, obviously, but the question has never been strictly about Simon.

While I have no personal experience with the monarchy, I do know what it’s like to consider walking away from a role that you assumed you would fill for the rest of your life. I know what it’s like to think about quitting your job.

There’s so much pressure on Wilhelm to assume the role of perfect Crown Prince. He’s told constantly—by Kristina, by Jan-Olof, by the court-- that he can’t let his family or his country down by deviating from this role in any way.

This is a pretty common experience for people who are trying to quit something. They are told that they will let down those around them if they leave. People who are leaving high demand religions are told that they will not be able to enter heaven.  Queer people in conservative families are told they can’t come out because “it would break [elderly relative]’s heart and kill them.” When I quit my job, I thought a lot about how I’d be letting down my coworkers and everyone who knew me as a hyper-competent career-driven person.(This included some of my doctors by the way, who expressed their disappointment in my failure to adhere to their idea of a “worthy” disabled person, i.e. someone who soldiered through the pain and continued to work. Some withdrew care because of this and honestly I will never forgive them). And maybe I was letting people down, and maybe ex-Mormons really will spend the afterlife in outer darkness, and maybe all the grandmas of queer people will be so upset that they kick the bucket when their grandkids come out. But ultimately, if your happiness or safety or well being depends on leaving, it doesn’t really matter. You have to do it anyway.  You have to abandon the things that you can no longer carry. You have to discover who you are on the other side of religion, of the closet, of capitalism.

I think about this every time people in the fandom talk about how Wilhelm leaving the line of succession will create a constitutional crisis, or impact all of Sweden negatively. I am personally pretty anti-monarchist, but I honestly can’t even tell you if I think that Wilhelm removing himself from the line of succession would bring about the end of the Swedish monarchy or not. Honestly, I don’t really care.  I care about Wilhelm. I want him to seek happiness, to search for the future that must live on the other side of this oppressive system he finds himself in. A constitutional crisis? That’s Kristina’s problem, that’s Jan-Olof’s problem, that’s the government’s problem. Radical acceptance means focusing on the things you can control, and Wilhelm can only control his own happiness.

When this issue gets debated, I often see people argue that Wilhelm is too young to make the decision to give up the throne. But the reality is that we ask teenagers to make decisions about their futures all the time. @bluedalahorse wrote a great piece of meta about that here. I love what she said so much I’m going to quote it directly:

Nonetheless, we ask teenagers of Sara and Wilhelm’s ages to think about decisions that affect their future all the time. We ask them to consider what career they’ll pursue or what university to attend. Teenagers who grow up in various denominations of Christianity consider whether they’re going to go through with Confirmation or sometimes Baptism. Other religions (ones where I can’t speak from as much personal experience) have various other rites of passage around this age, and various cultures have coming of age rituals. For some teens, they do these things willingly and with their whole heart, whereas for others, they do it to please their parents or families or for the social norms of it all.

And if Wilhelm is too young to decide to give up the throne, how can he be old enough to decide to keep it? Surely the decision to take on the governance of a country, even in a symbolic way, requires as much, if not more, maturity than the decision to pursue a less high-powered career elsewhere.

When people in the fandom claim that Wilhelm is too young to make this decision, I hear Kristina telling Wilhelm to wait until he’s 18 to come out, because only then will he be responsible enough to deal with the consequences. That’s a delaying tactic, and nothing more. People who don’t want you to leave will ask you to delay your decision over and over again, because they think that if they can kick the can down the road just a little farther, they’ll never have to lose you.

I also see people argue that Wilhelm isn’t qualified to make a decision because he doesn’t know enough about the “real world” to know what he is choosing. To be honest I don’t think most teenagers know much about the “real world”. I definitely didn’t. But we ask them to make decisions that will affect their futures anyway. And here’s another way to look at this: Wilhelm has plenty of places he can look to for examples of how “ordinary” people live. He can find out what it’s like to be from a noble but non-royal family from the students at Hillerska. He can talk to Simon and Linda about what their lives are like. He can read the millions of books, or watch the thousands of movies and TV shows that feature non-royal protagonists and were created by non-royal artists. But only Wilhelm knows what it is like to be Crown Prince. No one else has had that experience. So I would argue that actually, Wilhelm is the only one qualified to make this call.

Ultimately, the agency and mental capacity of people who are quitting is often doubted, usually by the people who have the most to gain by keeping them in place.

So many people have so much invested in maintaining the status quo. And as soon as you invest in a system, someone daring to leave puts your world view into question. Why are you dealing with so many oppressive rules if someone else can just leave? We see this a lot with high demand religions and cults; if someone threatens to break free, the members often join ranks and work together to pressure them to stay. What has your sacrifice as a woman in a patriarchal religion meant, for example, if another woman can decide to simply walk away? Does Kristina’s grim life of duty and sacrifice matter, if Wilhelm can just opt out and seek happiness instead? 

Then of course, there are all the benefits that an oppressive system confers on its most privileged members. Those benefits are in danger of disappearing if enough people quit, so high ranking people will work to keep others in line.  Think about all the people who benefit from the monarchy: all the staff who work for the royal family, all the nobles who get their reputation by proximity to the monarch, and everyone in Sweden who in general benefits from the image that a long-standing institution of white, straight, conservative power projects.

And those aren’t people Wilhelm needs to be responsible for (or should be concerned with placating, to be honest). If the monarchy fails because Wilhelm leaves, it’s because there’s always been a fault in the system. Those relying on this outdated system have signed their own fate.

No one knows fully what life will be like after they quit. That’s the radical acceptance part of quitting. You have to make a blind leap, and discover a whole new world once you land. Wilhelm is no more sheltered than anyone before they take this leap. Everyone who quits—a religion, a cult, a job—has to go through this process of rediscovery.  You have to learn by doing. People do that successfully all the time, and I believe that Wilhelm can too.

When I was talking about this meta with @bluedalahorse, we talked a lot about Plato’s allegory of the cave. That story goes something like this:

Several prisoners have been kept inside a cave their entire life. They are chained to the spot, and cannot move. They are facing the back wall of the cave. Behind them is a fire, and in between them and the fire, their captors walk back and forth, casting shadows on the wall. Because the prisoners have been kept in the cave their entire life and have only ever seen shadows, they think the shadows are real. They think the only thing that exists in the world is shadows. Until one day, one of the prisoners is set free. He goes outside for the first time, where he is blinded by the sun and overwhelmed by stimulus. But he discovers the real world. He now knows that the shadows he was used to are pale imitations of the real things. He’s so excited that he goes back to tell his fellow prisoners what he has learned. But the prisoners get angry at him for challenging their world view. They don’t believe him, no matter what he says.

There are a lot of ways you can interpret this story. Some people think that Plato is talking about the role of philosophers in society. Some people use it to explain a philosophical concept he writes about elsewhere called “forms”. But I think one thing is clear. Plato didn’t write the allegory of the cave (and it didn’t stick around in human imagination for thousands of years) because he thought you should stay in the cave. Leaving the cave is hard. You will be met with resistance. But discovering the real world, when you were only seeing shadows before, is worth it.

I want Wilhelm to leave to be happy, to see the real world instead of shadows. But I also believe it’s what the story demands. It’s the only answer that makes asking the dramatic question—should Wilhelm conform or rebel?—worthwhile to me.

To be king, but to be the first gay king, would be such an unsatisfactory ending for me. It reminds me of how hard I tried to keep my job—by working from bed, by reducing my hours. My boss could do the best he could to be accommodating, but ultimately working was harming me. You can’t adapt the monarchy enough to make it a non-damaging space for Wilhelm, because there will always be people pressuring him to conform to its straight, stoic ideals. Those ideals have been around for hundreds of years, and to put all of the burden of reforming them on Wilhelm is unfair and unrealistic. If he does stay, I see him struggling to change a system that is not designed for him. Even if he does make small victories for representation or inclusion in that context, it will come at an enormous emotional cost. I just don’t think it’s worth it. Not when there’s a whole world where Wilhelm could be doing good, important work– in whatever arena he chooses– that won’t also come along with inherent emotional trauma. 

Believe me, there’s a whole world to be discovered after you walk away from something that’s damaging you. You grieve, yes, but you also grow. Since quitting I’ve been able to love my friends harder, to treat myself better, to give back to the disabled community.  I think if you talk to most people who have committed a similar act of radical quitting they’ll say the same thing.  I want this future for Wilhelm, but I also want this kind of story to exist for all of us. I want there to be a story that represents those of us who have had to make these kinds of decisions. I want there to be a story that can encourage people who are currently wrestling with their desire to leave and the pressure to stay. And I want there to be a story that shows the hope, the bravery, and the self-belief that is required to walk away and seek a brighter future.

[thyla]

@machine-slays-dragons​ asked for a steddie fic rec. thought it might be easier to do a post and share. on request there will be no vampire!eddie fics on this list. and also i’m fairly new to steddie so i’m sure a lot of these fics have been read by lots of people. But I will try to stay clear of adding very popular ones to this list. so anz, hopefully there’s at least one fic on this list you haven’t read!! this isn’t even close to everything i’ve read just ones i’ve recently read. so here’s a short fic rec! Also! it’ll be a mixture of fics i’ve read on here and also fics i’ve read over on ao3.

Eddie’s Memory Log or read it here (starting here because I just finished this fic and it’s amazing 😘 go read!) 38,523 words

The only reason Steve volunteers to keep a journal to track Eddie Munson’s skim-milk memories, is because of the twerps. They have school, they can’t commute to the government-protected hospital that’s all the way in the city. That, and they gave Steve this well-rehearsed, tearjerker performance about how grateful they would be. About how grateful Eddie would be. Pfft like shit on a stick, he’ll be grateful. The dude doesn’t even remember how old he is, how the hell is supposed to be grateful for Steve Harrington jotting down notes in binder? But those kids have been through Spielberg-level disaster shit. Steve has too, but they’re just kids. So he’ll do it. He’ll do it for them and only them.

never been kissed (26,726 words)

Someone should... definitely check on how his brain is doing, after Eddie’s confession. Virginity is bullshit anyway, right? Robin told him about it, how it’s a completely made-up societal construct that invalidates a lot of queer people’s sexual experiences, and how toxic it can be to straight relationships too, so he can take her lesson to heart and be normal about it. Totally. “That’s so fucking hot,” he blurts out. Okay Harrington, way to be normal about it!Or, Steve is experienced, and Eddie is a virgin.

in breakable heaven (23,724 words)

"Dustin…” Nancy asks slowly. “Do they know we know?”

“No?” Dustin tries, but the way his voice goes up an octave or two betrays him.

“Dustin.” The girls say in unison.

“Okay, yes, they know you know!” Dustin finally gives in, throwing his hands in the air in defeat. It’s been one long summer and he just wants this thing to be over with already.

"Wait." Robin says. "They don't know that we know they know."

OR: Steve and Eddie are trying to hide their budding relationship, but their friends keep finding out anyway. Things take a turn for the worse when their friends try to mess with them to get revenge (based on Friends s5ep14 The One Where Everyone Finds Out)

slowly learning that life is okay series (35,112 words)

Under a much different circumstance, Eddie would have loved to have Steve’s eyes looking over him like that, would love to have that determination focused on him, but Eddie is very much dying, he knows it, so he smiles at Steve’s misplaced confidence instead, “High expectations, Stevie. Where’d you learn to swing like that anyway?”

“I’ll tell you,” Steve’s voice is a bit shaky, his tone wavering, even as he puts on a brave face, “but you have to stay alive, Munson.”

If he had more strength, he’d consider testing his luck one last time, tease Steve by asking if he swings for Eddie’s team, but- he’s tired.

Dying young. What a fucking nightmare.

Or, what if the Party defeats Vecna in time, and Eddie lives?

There id a Light That Never Goes Out series (73,886 words)

It’s not even the nightmares most of the time. At this point, Steve would totally settle for some up close and personal time in his brainpan with the Upside Down if it meant he could actually fucking sleep.

Crimson and Clover verse (20,685 words)

“There’s no immediate supernatural danger to our universe currently, not at this exact moment. I’ll be sure to let you know if there is. I’m just trying to get a little buzzed and have a good night, okay? Not everyone has to be perpetually horny all the time.” “It’s like I don’t even know you anymore!” Robin says, mock-hurt.

Or, Steve has a bisexual identity crisis and Eddie just wants to make him feel good.

or or or I saw a post about Eddie having a black hankie in his back pocket which in gay hankie code in the eighties meant that you were into S&M.

don’t ruin this on me (2,298 words)

Steve had always loved making his partners feel good. Watching people cum just from his mouth, their legs clamped around his ears–it was his favourite thing.

Or it was, before Eddie Munson ruined it for him. Ruined him..

(Or: Eddie sets out to Destroy Steve in the best way.)

Seems to Satisfy (5,348 words)

“I can’t like… get hard. At all. Since, uhhh -” he trailed off awkwardly.

There was silence, for a second. Steve’s fingers dug into his thighs.

“You… what?” said Eddie, finally.

love is like ghosts (7,780 words)

They stand at the base of a short flight of stairs leading up to the old university library. From everything Steve’s read, it’s one of the most haunted places in Indiana… within a tank of gas’ drive… that would let them in after hours.

“It’s the witching hour,” Eddie says spookily. He’s come up behind Steve, pressing close and wiggling his fingers on Steve’s shoulders.

Steve huffs a laugh and starts double checking his pockets for his share of the gear. Something to focus on that’s not the way Eddie’s breath ruffles his hair and skims over his cheek, raising goosebumps in its wake.

It’s not like he doesn’t like the attention, the closeness, the physicality of Eddie. He does. Probably too much. Especially since they’re just friends. Steve knows he’s not special to be on the receiving end, it’s how Eddie is with everyone.

the lathe (82,547 words)

"This time, do it right. This time Eddie won’t bleed out in his arms, in anyone’s arms. This time, Steve will do it right."

— or, steve relives the day they try to kill vecna over and over, and eddie just can't seem to stop dying. steve finds this totally unacceptable.

flight risk (81,321 words)

Eddie Munson is famous for giving his bodyguards the slip. Enter Steve Harrington. Has this bratty rock star finally met a babysitter that can keep up with him?

Rock My World (23,160 words)

After a lot of nagging from Dustin, Steve agrees to take him to see Eddie’s band, Corroded Coffin, play at the Hideout. He finds himself focused on more than just the music…

—

Or, Steve has a hell of a revelation.

In Your Eyes series (48,965 words)

It was decided then and there in the Buckley residence’s lounge, on their weird Persian carpet while staring up at the off-white ceiling and Robin giggling at his side. He was going to rock Steve Harrington’s platonic world, man. And nothing was going to get in his way.

Or... Eddie notices Steve struggles with touch and in trying to help his new friend, develops feelings along the way.

i don’t ask much (i just want you) (8,224 words)

"The fuck are you doing, Harrington?"

"Getting comfortable." Is the only response Eddie receives before Steve's head lands on his shoulder, half on his chest as he scoots up in the bed. Eddie freezes, mid air guitar solo, and frowns.

"Personal space, dude." He's so proud of his voice for not cracking when he says it, "Heard of it?"

Steve snorts and takes a puff, smoke clouding around his mouth before he blows it away, lips pursed in the air. "Don't think you're one to talk about personal space but I'll move if you want."

the affliction of the feelings (27,203 words)

“Hold on,” Robin interrupts. “Hold on, is this— are you, like. Do you know what masochism is?”

“I know I act like it sometimes, Robin, but I’m not actually fucking twelve,” Steve says.

OR: Eddie has a black hanky in his back pocket.

Steve and Eddie: Alternative ‘First’ meeting (read here on tumblr)

The Shire is NOT on Fire (54,148 words)

The kids convince Steve to take them all to a Renaissance Faire and LARP event. Steve has more fun than he admits. And then Steve has a LOT more fun than he admits.

November Paramedic (read here on tumblr) or on ao3 (25,662 words)

Eddie has had his fair share of fantasies, but none of them involved fucking a paramedic.

Until two years ago.

That's when the "sexy men at work"-calendar got added to his porn stash and orgasms as he knew them changed forever. All the men in the calendar are hot, but none of them hold a candle to the paramedic. He's got this look in his eyes, this slant to his mouth. Like he knows he's the hottest guy in it.

And everything is fine. Everything is great. Eddie's been single forever and he has no idea where he's headed in life, but he's fine.

At least until he's collateral damage in a bar fight after a gig, and none other than his sexy November-paramedic arrives to treat his wounds.