#I’ve been listening to ddaeng and promise up there

[babiemochie]

everyone getting their Spotify wrapped I have a confession

[justasparkwritings]

Illicit Affairs: Beautiful Rooms Pt. 3

Previous: Beautiful Rooms Pt. 2 

Pairings: Namjoon & Reader (Barely)

Genre: Angst, Slice of Life

Ratings: PG15

Word Count: 2.1K

Warnings: Therapy and Swearing, Lots of Reminiscing 

Summary: Under the guidance of Dr. Aarons, Jungkook and Namjoon work to rebuild their relationship. 

Listen: illicit affairs by Taylor Swift

          “Let’s debrief,” Dr. Aarons sits gently in her chair, hair grown out a little, the new length carefully tossed over her shoulder. She adjusts the pen in her hand and consults the list in her notebook. “We’ve covered a lot of ground in the last few weeks, but there’s one piece we haven’t discussed.”

           “What is that?” Namjoon asks.

           “There’s a new stipulation in Jungkook’s contract that says he can date, I understand, similar to yours, it was a consolation prize,”

           “Mm, when the lawyers and I renegotiated the contracts, it seemed fair that he get something special in return,” Namjoon answers.

           “Jungkook, how do you feel about it?”

           “About dating?”

           “Yes, with all you’ve been through, bringing another person into your life?”

           “I feel, scared,”

           “Can you explain that?”

           “Scared that all of the trauma is going to come back, scared I’m not enough, scared I can’t love someone,”

           “Why do you think that?” Namjoon asks.

           “You don’t get it, do you?” Jungkook’s earnestness slips through his syllables.

           “What don’t I get?”

           “Joon, I’ve spent nearly a decade thinking that Big Hit loves me because I work myself to the bone, because I damage my body and push it past its limits. Love costs,”

           “No it doesn’t,”

           “Your love cost,”

           “No,” Namjoon shakes his head. In the nearly two months they’ve spent in this room with Dr. Aarons, Namjoon has had his share of epiphanies. This, this is new and horrifying.

           “Yes,”

           “I,” Namjoon lunges at Jungkook, a foreign behavior that results in Dr. Aarons gasping. But he doesn’t fight him, he pulls him in, hugging him fiercely. “It doesn’t, it doesn’t Jungkook, there is no price to my love, I swear.”

           “This is the last hurdle I want us to discuss before the rest of the members arrive this week.”

           “Okay,” Namjoon sits back in his spot, leaving Jungkook’s arms empty.

           “We have to separate the idea that the actions you carried out aren’t related to love,”

           “How do we do that?”

           “Jungkook, you’ve made a list of memorable moments with Namjoon, both positive and hurtful, we’re going to work through them to separate the different emotions during those moments. Sound good?”

           “Yes,” The men reply.

           Dr. Aaron’s projects a table on the empty wall to their right, a natural screen. Namjoon stares at the T-Chart and reads over the first event.

           “Jungkook, why don’t you read the first one?”

            “Namjoon asks for a hug on stage,” Jungkook reads.

           “Why did you bring this memory to us?”

           “It’s always stuck in my mind,”

           “Can you elaborate on why?” Dr. Aarons smiles at the blush on Jungkook’s cheeks, before she turns to Namjoon. “Namjoon, what do you remember of that day?”

           “That was, what, Love Yourself World tour? Yeah, I was just feeling so emotional, we were in Seoul before going to the US to play stadiums. It was all so overwhelming, to start in our hometown, to be there, as Bangtan with all we’d been through.”

           “Jungkook, why did this stand out to you?”

           “Namjoon-hyung isn’t one for physical affection, he’s not like Hobi-hyung or Jimin-hyung, he doesn’t walk around with a free hug sign… it was so special that he wanted to share that with me, with all of us on stage in front of everyone.”

           “Was that moment pure love, or calculated action?” Dr. Aarons inquires.

           “Pure love,” The men answer in unison.

           “Let’s look at the next one.”

           “Preparation for Billboard awards,” Jungkook reads.

           “Which time?” Namjoon asks.

           “2018,” Jungkook specifies.

           “Oh, Fake Love era,” He nods his head, mind already racing through the string of events that made that year nearly unbearable.

           “Yes,”

           “Granted, we are only on the second event, but 2018 seems to have been one hell of a year. What was going on behind the scenes?”

           The thing about being a therapist is that you always know more than your clients think. Particularly when they’re famous, and Billboard has created detailed lists of their accomplishments for the last few years, you tend to be clued in when a high-profile individual waltzes through your doors. Dr. Aarons had never worked with an idol of such status and power as Jungkook and Namjoon, and eventually OT7. So, to prepare, she naturally went in to read the facts. The lists of accomplishments, itemized by year, proved indelible to her work with them. She felt prepared when Jungkook walked into her office, and through their dedicated time each day, she learned more and more. Dr. Aarons could see in that first meeting how damaged his psyche was, she could see the betrayal and confusion, the years of misuse of his body, the systems woven into his DNA that he was going to have to relearn. But she also saw the drive, the hope, the soul in his midnight irises. Now, watching him interact with Namjoon, she was beginning to feel proud of all the progress he’s made.

           “We were practicing nonstop,” Jungkook’s voice pulls her back.

           Namjoon nods, “We were all falling apart.”

           Dr. Aarons hums thoughtlessly, an empty gesture to the two whose minds are reliving the hell from that year. “This is when you considered breaking up?”

           “Disbanding, yeah,” Namjoon nods again. “We met and talked about it, a lot. It was hard navigating the pressure of becoming a more global group and the pressures of the Korean music industry.”

           “Hobi-hyung and Jimin-hyung released solo stuff, too,” Jungkook adds

           “I did too,” Namjoon reminds him. “It was a busy year with a lot of promotions and changes, so many music videos, we played the Tokyo Dome,”

           “Mic Drop Remix came out, and we had a song go platinum for the first time,”

           “We started to win big at MNET and MAMA awards,”

           “Wasn’t that the first time we were in Time Magazine?”

           “Mm, the world voted us person of the year,” Namjoon remembers receiving the news, they had been ecstatic.

           “But you wanted to disband?” Dr. Aarons wonders. “Why?”

           “All that success was overwhelming,” Jungkook answers.

           “Jungkook, you’re an introvert?”

           “Yes,”

           “I can imagine the toll that took on you, and still does, finding time to rest and recharge,” Dr. Aarons has had this conversation with him before, the need to manage his introverted personality, how he controls his body and the world around him. The tattoos, the piercings, the hair dying. All symptoms. All things she wasn’t sure Namjoon had realized.

           “I guess I thought exercise was a way to manage it,” He shrugs.

           “Jungkook, what stands out to you about Namjoon at this time?”

           “He was the reason I joined, the promises he made. We were together wondering if it was worth it and I just felt like I’d sacrificed so much, my body was breaking, and he was sitting there wondering if we should quit.”

           “Mm, did you feel betrayed?”

           “Yes, by him,”

           “What about the other members?”

           “They didn’t see it that way, Namjoon-hyung didn’t promise them what he promised me,”

           “You were feeling betrayed by him, and working your body to the max with minimal success,”

           “Yes,”

           “Namjoon, how were you feeling?”

           “I felt like we were gaining success but at what cost?”

           “That cost was me,” Jungkook says. “It’s always been me.”

           “Jungkook,”

           “Namjoon, we’ve been working on this, but there’s still a disconnect.”

           “I don’t know how to make him understand what I was going through too,”

           “Mm, Jungkook?”

           “Ttaeron naui sum makhil ttaemyeon / Mojal nulleosseugo gyesok dallyeo” Jungkook replies.

           “I know,”

           “You don’t, you never will. You got love, you got a career, you got a life, you got it all.” Jungkook whispers.

           “Was 2018, specifically the lead up to the Fake Love performance love, or calculated action?” Dr. Aarons presses.

           “Both,” Jungkook answers.

           “Elaborate,” She requests.

           “Namjoon-hyung wanted to walk away because he loved us, he respected us, he wanted us to be happy. But pushing me in rehearsals and building me up by complimenting the results was calculated. The lies he told were planned. He knew what he was doing to me.”

           “Namjoon, do you think that’s a fair assessment?”

           “Yes. You were also working out so much because you had to lift your shirt every time, we did that stupid song,” Namjoon sits back, the air in his lungs deflating.

           “Who decided that?” Dr. Aarons asks. “It’s something I’ve wondered about.”

           “Choreographer,” They answer.

           “Could it have been a calculated move?”

           “Maybe,” Jungkook answers. Namjoon sits silently, staring at his hands. His silence tells Dr. Aarons everything she needs to know, it was.

           “Hmm, alright next,”

           “Bangtan performing Ddaeng together,” Jungkook reads.

           “Tell me about that,”

           “We had two concerts, like a showcase, and OT7 decided we wanted to perform Ddaeng together. We divided the vocal line, Hoseok took Jimin and Seokjin, Yoongi took Taehyung, and I had Jungkook. We rehearsed and then performed together,” Namjoon explains.

           “What was special about this?”

           “We never perform rap line songs with the rap line. It was a surprise to the fans, and something we all really wanted to do. Namjoon and I have always been close, and he let me really take the verse and make it mine for those performances,”

           “Namjoon, why did you pick Jungkook?”

           “I didn’t, it was just, decided,”

           “Hobi-hyung took Jimin and Jin because they were the least experienced with rapping, and were happier to split a verse than have their own.”

           “Taehyung wanted Yoongi’s verse, desperately wanted it.”

           “I would’ve been happy with either, but I guess, I’ll take any opportunity to work with Joon-hyung,”

           “How was rehearsing?”

           “Really fun,” Jungkook says. “It was the most fun I’ve had in rehearsal, maybe ever,”

           “It was thrilling to watch him take on this song, my verse and make it his own. Our styles are very different. It was fun to watch him play with it, make it his,”

           “You still rapped parts of it with him,”

           “We took turns at the beginning of the verse,” Jungkook answers. “Then I did the rest.”

           “Love, or calculated?”

           “Love,” Namjoon answers.

           “Was it?” Jungkook asks.

           “You think it would be calculated?” Namjoon asks.

           “Show me how I could do more than just sing, push me to explore different parts of my job, continue my drive. Could’ve been calculated,”

           “But you didn’t get into rapping at that point, you haven’t yet,”

           “True,”

           “From what I’m hearing, it sounds like love,” Dr. Aarons decides. “You two have come a long way in the last two months. I’m excited to talk to the other members and work through a few items with them too. How are you feeling about them coming?”

           “I’m excited,” Jungkook tells her. “I haven’t seen them in a while, I miss them.”

           “I’m happy we’ll get to work through this, though, very nervous,” Namjoon answers.

           “Good. All things to take into consideration as we ready our minds for our meeting.”

           Dr. Aarons bids the men adieu, and as they exit into the LA sun, Namjoon turns to Jungkook.

           “You’ve come a long way,” Namjoon compliments.

           “So have you,” Jungkook responds.

           “Do you want to get dinner later?” Namjoon inquires, eyes hopeful. They haven’t had many 1-1 moments, a few work activities together, some studio time and lyric sessions, but limited social time. At first Joon hated it, but after meeting with Dr. Aarons a few times outside of their group work, he came to realize how important it was for each of them to be apart, separated during their therapy.

           “I can’t, but maybe we can get coffee tomorrow before the guys show up?” Jungkook offers. It’s a consolidation prize, Namjoon can see it in the way he shrinks himself in the sunshine.

           “Sounds good, I’m moving into a bigger place with them, are you coming too?” Namjoon inquires.

           “No, I’m staying in mine. Dr. Aarons’ wants me to slowly transition back to work,” Jungkook informs him.

           “That’s a good plan,” Namjoon nods, sunglasses masking the disappointment in his eyes.

           “Yeah, so coffee, tomorrow?”

           Namjoon nods, “Eight?”

           “Sounds good,” Jungkook waves at Namjoon before turning and going his own way.

           Jungkook has plans, plans that he’s sure will go from dinner through the evening until early morning when his new love has to go to work. It’s new, a few weeks old, but feels like being on stage: familiar, comfortable, challenging, exhilarating, home. Jungkook’s only told Dr. Aarons about it, and she’s given him cautious advice. He had asked Dr. Aarons if this was a good idea, a relationship, dating at all… potentially his first real relationship with someone who looked at him like, like no one had before. It was something that was just his, in his heart, to be shared with her and only her.

           So maybe he was ditching and lying to Namjoon, but after nearly a decade, isn’t it time?

Next: Beautiful Rooms Pt. 4

[katebacks]

Ddaeng - Min Yoongi (M) Part 1

— pairing | Min Yoongi /Reader — word c | 1,709 — genre | Idol! Yoongi. Smut. — summary | Yoongi just performed and goes straight to the dressing room to meet you and continue the show, but a more private one.  — warnings/tags | Bad words. Explicit sex.  This cover was made by @gotyouintrouble and I really loved it. This fic was inspired by my diva, @minstrivia, thank you very much for the inspiration.  It was supposed to be just one chapter, but I ended up getting excited and this story will have two parts. 

Part 1 | 

You couldn’t be more prouder of your boyfriend and his friends as you were at that moment. You were with Yoongi for almost 5 years and knew how the BTS journey had been until they became famous all over the world, you knew how they'd struggled for it, and knew how important that was to them. 

At that moment, the three rappers of the group were on stage, performing the song that for you was now one of your favorites. Ddaeng. You loved how Yoongi's voice fit the letter perfectly, how he sounded extremely sexy with that melody. His movements with his arms, his body moving, his facial expressions, whatever he was doing, made you crazy. God, you loved that man. There wasn’t a day in your life that you didn’t thank the universe for putting you and him on the same path, there wasn’t a day you didn’t thank all the gods for having made that guy with porcelain skin pouring iced coffee on your clothes 5 years ago.

On the stage, Yoongi felt all that adrenaline and as always, he did his best to impress everyone who was there, but mainly to impress his girl who was in the backstage watching him. During the performance, he made a point of looking directly at the camera, knowing that you were there on the other side, freaking out with his show. He loved Army, and he knew that all his fans loved him too, but he also knew that you were his number one fan.

Ah! How he loved you. He loved you for everything, for having been his safe haven for so many years, for not giving up on him when he had identity crises and when he said that he would never be no one in life, he loved you for always having him motivated, even in the worst moments of his life and of course, for having the best sex he had ever tasted in his life. Yoongi loved how you fucked. He loved when your body moved over his, loved how you moaned his name and loved when you held his body, wanting more and more. He wanted to be with you forever.

After the song ended, the three of them left the stage, both sweaty and panting and were welcomed by the other members who were about to enter the stage to perform 'The Truth Untold' and 'Dimple'. And as RM and Jhope went to their respective rooms to change and rest for a few minutes before returning to the stage with full force, Suga walked quickly to his room where he would change and as soon as he came in and his eyes hit you, sitting watching the television, watching the Vocal line now invading the stage, the spark that was burning inside his chest, turned into a great fire and he walked over to you, pulling off his sweater and tossing it to the floor, holding your wrist and pulling you toward the small bathroom that was there.

As he closed the door behind him kicking it, he grabbed your waist and sat you on top of the sink.  He pressed his lips to yours, thrusting his hands through your hair, pulling it hard, and biting your lips with desire while you were already with your hands on the zipper of his pants, opening it and pushing down, revealing his hard and pulsing cock.

"Fuck, I've been waiting for this since I got on that damn stage." He whispered between your lips before pulling your hair, making you tilt your head back, giving him room to bite and suck your neck.

"Let me suck you." You moaned, but he grunted in denial, holding his chin and making you look directly into his dark, lush eyes. His sweaty forehead and his heavy, peppermint-like breath were driving you crazy.

"You have no idea how much I want your delicious little mouth on my dick right now, but we have no time. I need to fuck you and cum inside you before I go back to the stage or everyone will notice my hard dick inside my pants and that's not good at all. So be a good girl, let me cum in your pussy and later when we get to the hotel, I promise to make you cum for the rest of the night. Deal?"

“Deal.”

He kissed you once more before pulling you a little farther, making your butt stand on the edge of the sink. He knelt in front of you, placed his hands on your knees and spread your legs, starting to kiss the inside of your thighs, leaving you desperate for him to kiss another place. Thank God you were wearing dress. Yoongi stroked you over your panties before pulling it to the side and touching your clit with his tongue, making you grab his hair and lean your head in the mirror behind you, biting your lip to keep from moaning. He didn’t take long, just enough to make you even wetter, because he didn’t want to hurt you. When he stood again, he ran his hands under your thighs and held them firmly.

"Push your panties aside, baby." And so you did, pulled your panties aside, giving him room to push his hard, big cock into you, slowly, making him lean his forehead against yours, groaning as he felt you stretching around him. And when he was totally in, Yoongi began to move his hips quickly, not having the time and patience to fuck you with love at that moment, he just wanted to see you come around him, moaning his name like you always did. You grabbed his shoulders and pressed your lips trying to the utmost not to scream with the force he was beating inside you.

"Oh my god ... Yoongi" You groaned huskily, and he shook your lips with his, in a desperate way to keep you silent, before anyone would hear you both. He was too jealous to let that happen. "Fuck!" You exclaimed when he hit hard on a spot inside you, and even though that grunt made his cock harden even more, he bit his lip, annoyed that you were making noise.

"Be quiet, or someone will hear us," he whispered and you opened your eyes to the look at him with a defiant look.

"And? Don’t you want your friends to hear how your bitch moans? " You asked and Yoongi thrusted hard in the same moment he held your mouth knowing that you would scream and with the other hand he drew the back of your head as you wrapped your legs around his waist.

"Yeah, I don’t want them to listen to my moaning bitch," he said slowly, his eyes blazing as he thrust slowly and hard into your pussy, making you drop a muffled scream with every thrust. “You are fucking mine, and i am the only one allowed to listen these hot moans. Get it, baby?”

“Yes, Yoongi oh shit.”

Soon Yoongi pulled you out of the sink and turned your back on him, making you bend over the sink to raise your hip and start pounding into you from behind, holding your waist and trying to keep you as close as possible.

"Damn Yoongi, go slow or I will not get ... fuck." You screamed when he thrusted at once, making you see stars. He then held your neck, choking you, pulling you back, causing you to bend back and lean your head against his shoulder,  as he banging hard from behind, staring straight into your eyes, watching you frown more and more as he added strength and speed of the thrusts.

"Your. Pussy. Fucking. Good. Fuck! "He moaned, seeing your eyes that poured desire, making your body shiver and making the butterflies in your stomach go crazy. "You're so tight, baby. Even though I fuck you hard every night, even if my dick stretch you up, you're still so tight for me, shit, I wanna fuck you forever."

"Hyung, are you here?" Suddenly you heard Namjoon's voice coming from outside the bathroom and you tensed, but Yoongi just covered your mouth and kept going.

"Yes," he said hoarsely, taking his free hand to your clit massaging it, making your whole body shiver again and your legs start to shake when you felt like you was about to cum.

"We came back to the stage in four minutes. Are you ready? "Namjoon's voice was closer to the bathroom door and you widened your eyes, which made Yoongi laugh.

"Almost. I'll meet you in a few minutes. "He said and smiled when he saw you frowning and closing your eyes tightly, feeling your cunt squeeze around his cock when you started to cum and had to squeeze his arm to not scream. He smirked.

"Alright, we'll be waiting." And so he heard the door of the room being closed, giving him the freedom to fuck you again with all the strength he had.

"You dirty girl. You liked listening to my leader's voice while you were being fucked, didn’t you? you liked the feeling of almost being caught sliding on my dick, you little bitch? Hm?” He asked in a hoarse voice, not taking his hand off your clit, making you roll your eyes, feeling that it was too much. “Fuck baby. I’m gonna cum.” He groaned and a few seconds later, you felt his cock throbbing inside you. Yoongi stopped moving and hugged your trembling body, kissing your shoulders as you breathed deeply trying to regain your breath. “I love you, you know that, right?”

You smiled and nodded.

“I love you too." You said turning your face a little and kissing his lips. "Now go, you have to run back to the stage, or they'll wonder why you're gone."

"You made a mess on my dick, baby." He said as he began to put on his clothes. You laughed and put your hand on his chest, innocently.

"You want me to get down on my knees and clean it for, Daddy?"

He narrowed his eyes and cupped your chin, giving you a wet kiss, that lit your fire again.. You wanted more.

"Later, baby."

all rights reserved © katebacks | 2019 — no reposting and/or modifying of any form on any medium is allowed. no translations allowed.

[ksjknj]

IM SORRY do you want me to stop i don't want to make you uncomfortable, ur excitement and kindness just makes u cute plus you've been putting up w my dumbass asks so there's that. ah that's so exciting that you're experimenting with your fashion!! 💕💕 joon would be so happy and proud awww how would you describe your style rn do you think? and gosh y e s they really are the best rap line, so intense and so passionate about music but such DORKS as well they're just. they own my heart 💞💞💞

uncomfortable?? oh no no no pls i’m lowkey loving it ahdks you’re too kind and sweet to me and are no way in hell making me uncomfortable i promise!! so no worries really i’m just extremely flattered (also what dumbass asks?? idk what you’re talking about i only know extremely kind and adorable asks so nO IDEA WHAT YOU’RE ON ABOUT SORRY)

ahsjdkds n thank you for saying that?? ‘m just sorta kinda trying to find myself .. bc with uni being extremely busy i just throw on whatever in the morning n i’ve been mostly wearing oversized stuff (which i love, don’t get me wrong) but i kinda wanna try the more ... nice stuff too? since it’s summer n really hot rn i’d say my style is A Mess ahjdk but i bought some pretty coats to wear once autumn starts so uhh i’m gonna try fancier things again? if that makes senee asjddks but yeah my style really is all over the place i’m in skinny black jeans and an oversized pink hoodie one day and in a fancy button up and black trousers next gosh i really jump from one to another so fast

THEY ARE !!!! GOSH I LOVE THEM TONS i’d include another pic right here god they’re wonderful and seeing them create all those songs... .wow. . .watch me listen to ddaeng on repeat for the next few days whoops