#I’m using Simon on other socials lol

[depressedfungus]

Made some gay icons for myself so thought I’d share for others to use!

[ladygoth]

Gotta keep this short n quick im sorry needa rush to somewhere

Simon makes her jealous in some kinda way, and she feels jealous at first, but then her insecurities get the best of her and Simon not saying i love you to her sends her to the past.

I don’t know how was this lol but anything angsty would be cooollll love youuu

if you think i've deleted this i havent i was just wondering what would be the proper plot lmao. thank you for this ask

♱⋆♱ ᴡɪᴄᴋᴇᴅ ɢᴀᴍᴇꜱ ♱⋆♱

mdni very 18+ angst, insecure!reader, annoying!ghost, make-up/surprise sex, oral!femreceiving, rough sex and daddy kink

simon ghost riley.

summary - ghost makes you feel insecure about your relationship with him but he makes it up to you in the end.

specifically influenced by the weeknd - wicked games.

You thought that you guys were past this, the petty moments and disputes, but you had an idea that there’d be a time where Ghost would want to mentally stab back, have you jealous with the way you had him jealous, specifically with Mike.

Though did he have to do it when things were getting better between the both of you?

Did he have to flirt in front of you? With a waitress in the restaurant, he took you out in? Between the both of you, you had always imagined Ghost to be the more mature and cultivated individual, but you been aware that life was always full with surprises.

During the drive back to the apartment building, you had been silent, arms crossed and leaning opposite away from him while he tried to lay his hand against your thigh, he did speak about how pretty you looked, how the dress you wore was so appealing on you and he couldn’t wait to take it off you, but your lack of response had him aware that you had been put off.

“Baby?” He called, his tone light but curious and you had wondered if he had pretended to act stupid, to hear from you why you had been upset. “What’s wrong?”

Unresponsive, you had looked down at your knees, worried that if you had uttered a word you’d tremble into tears.

“Doll?” He called, “if you’re upset, I’d like for you to communicate.” He said and nervous, you had licked your lower lips. “Things just started to get good again luvie.”

“Why did you have to flirt with her?” You asked.

“I wasn’t flirting with her, was jus’ being kind,” he shrugged and dissatisfied you had furrowed your eyebrows, your face screwed and cattish. Aware of the malevolent look on your face, he had softly sighed. “She complimented me and I complimented her back, nothing to over-think about.”

Jaw clenched, you had looked through the glass window, focusing on the night lights that his car had driven pass by. “Baby,” he muttered and with a catty spirit you had picked up your phone and scrolled through the endless social media algorithm you had found yourself in. “We need to speak to each other---”

“Well, I don’t want to, just drive back home,” you muttered and defeated Ghost had remained reticent as he resumed driving back to the apartment building. Once the both of you had arrived, you had quickly let yourself out of the vehicle, ignoring his calls, you had entered the building, briefly greeting the receptionist as you had entered the elevator, though Ghost had been quick, catching up after you, which had been unfortunate, for you.

“Don’t be childish about this, love,” he said, his voice rough before pressing the level button both your homes had been in. “You coming home with me? Or is it yours we’re gonna be in.”

Amused, you had briefly looked up at him, it was as if he had taken mission to piss you off. “I want to be on my own.”

“Jesus Christ,” he sighed. “A’right, I’m sorry for complimenting the waitress, happy?” He asked as the elevator doors opened, a ding echoing in the comfortable spaced box. You had stepped out of the elevator, arms crossed as you scurried to your front door, feeling Ghost’s figure shadow after you. “Doll,” he breathed. “I don’t want to go sleep knowing you’re upset with me,” he shared.

“Isn’t it something you’re used to?” You spat as you pushed your key in.

“Not something I want to live through again,” he spoke while following you in. “I’ll sleep in the other room if you want.”

“What I want, is for you to not be here,” you snapped. “But it’s not like you ever listen to me.”

“If I listened to you love, that would lead me to standing out your door the next day because you won’t open it, you would probably change the locks too.”

You clicked your tongue in annoyance, he was somewhat correct. “Okay,” you huffed as you pulled off your coat. “I’ll be going to bed, don’t come into my room.” You said and without countering with a comment, Ghost had sighed before leading himself into the guest room.

♱⋆♱

You weren’t able to sleep, and you hated the fact that you would’ve been able to sleep if Ghost had been beside you, his arms wrapped around your waist, engulfing you with his heat while his chin rests against the top of your head, his light snores lulling you into a deep slumber. Then you’d wake up to him making breakfast, kissing you once you make it to him and he’d do that thing where he squeezes your ass before bringing you into a deep kiss.

You had sighed as you had dragged yourself to the open kitchen, the lamp had still been on and you had checked the time and had noticed it had barely been two hours since you had gone to sleep. and the ambience had been somewhat comforting, thus you had tasked yourself to drink water and to have a little snack before returning to bed, but you couldn’t help be but absorbed and consumed by the endless thoughts that had wheeled in your head.

Were you over-reacting? Were you being insecure, the fact that Ghost had never told you that had loved you had swamped and deluged your security. The two of you were able to make it past the three-month period but you couldn’t help but feel like Ghost would find someone better than you, someone he would tell “I love you,” to.

Maybe it was just as simple as that, Ghost didn’t love you, perhaps he was just infatuated with you, and had found himself to be sexual and erotic whenever he had been around you, and you had deciphered that lust to be, love.

“Couldn’t sleep?” God.

You had jumped, your hand pressed against your chest as you had gasped, he wasn’t wearing his mask, handsome and beautiful as ever he had leaned against the sharp corner of a wall, arms crossed, face still but a bit humoured. With your eyebrows furrowed, you had sat yourself down on one of the island seats, close to the lamp that had dimply illuminated the space.

“Why aren’t you asleep?” You asked.

“Why aren’t you, love?” He countered and with your lips pressed into a thin line, you had adjusted your sight forward. “You’re crying.”

What?

Quickly, you had wiped your tears once you had settled down your glass, aware that he had moved closer to you, sitting himself next to you, “Babydoll,” he muttered and with a short hum, you barely glanced his way. “Should’ve known how much it would’ve affected you.”

“Okay.”

“I care for you a lot, you know that?”

“Yeah.”

You were unsure.

“I was being stupid.”

“Yeah.”

He paused. “You don’t want to talk to me?”

“Yeah.”

“Goodnight then,” he muttered as he left the seat he previously sat on, leaving to the guest room, he took one last look, expecting for a goodnight but there had been nothing said from you.

♱⋆♱

Eyes blurred, you had gently gripped the sheets as you had felt a strong commodity continuously part the hearth between your legs, a light confused moan echoing in your room transforming into strong whiny groan once you understood what had been happening.

“Ghost,” you whimpered, your hand now dug into his short hair, his mouth buried between your cunt as he greedily licked between your skin, the flat texture of his tongue teasing against your pearl repeatedly, playing and sucking with the bud hungrily, he had moaned, standing on his knees as continued to devour your nectar. “Fuck!” You cried out, “fuck you…” you had trembled as your eyes rolled back in pleasure, feeling the warm palm of his hands stroke towards the back of your knees, pushing your leg down to spread your pussy more.

His eyes staring at you, erotic with mischief he had commenced to flick the tip of his tongue against your sex, the lower body of his stiff, as he could feel himself want to cum. “Shit,” he moaned as he humped his covered cock against your bed, “so good princess,” he whined, his moan tight as his load seeped in his clothes, proudly cumming to the taste and scent of your ambrosia, he had now began to selfishly suck on your heat, his ears flooded with the high moans from you, your legs trembling at the approaching orgasm, you had leaned your head back, your sex hot and wet at the sight of your boyfriend’s handsome face go down on you.

Your cries echoing into a brewing shameful cry, your toes curling as your nectar gushed and heaved against his face, Simon, desperate to catch as much of your eject with his mouth, his opening slurping with the effect of your sweet expel as your hand had possessively still been at the top of his head, your eyes blurry with erotic tears once he had pulled away from you, once more, you had noted how he had cummed himself, an arrogant smile laced on your face as you had watched him gravely pull down his pants, aware that he had not worn boxers, the large cock heaved out of his clothes.

Red and angry, you had viewed the fierce veins that had been wrapped around his cock boldly stand out, his length throbbing in desire of your wetness and hearth. “Oh, Babydoll,” he lightly whined, hovering over you before he had kissed you, the tip of his cock shadowing against your wet opening, his lips moving to your jaw before sliding himself inside of you, your insides shifting and spreading due to his size and as kickback your mouth had opened and loudly moaned.

He didn’t take long before adjusting into a quick pace, formed in his favourite position, the mating press, you had felt your sex grip tightly around him once you felt his tip sweep against your cervix, his face focused and lustful he resumed on adjusting his hips backwards and forwards, his veiny cocky kissing the soft walls of your heat that had possessively wrapped around him, had influenced him to push his size deeper into your body, “Fit just for me,” he moaned, “so perfect,” he whined as he continued to buck his hips forward.

“Just for you,” you moaned, “I’m just for you,” you cried out, overwhelmed by his size you had brought your nails against his bare back, digging them into his skin, marking his body with your digits---you had frantically pulled your head back, his sac smacking against your ass while the length of his shaft dug deeper than the previous push.

Your lips had trembled. “Daddy!” You cried out, drowned by your pleasure you had been unaware of the bulge print that had stuck out from your stomach, Ghost prideful of his cock fitting in your tight cunt had resumed on abusing the spongy button within your sex with the head of his member, your moans twirling higher every second while the friction had moved your body to move on its own.

“Good girl, you’re such a good girl for me,” he muttered. “So tight and wet,” he said before he had bit his lips, his thrusts angry and hungry, racing for his climax the man had continued to buck his hips forward, “imma fill you up with my cum,” he whined, “belly swollen,” he desperately whispered, “All because of me, such a good girl, my little princess.”

His obsessive comments whispered into your ear, egging you into dishevelled state, a pinch feeling gathering around your sex before your walls continuously throbbed around him. “Cum for me,” he commanded. “Cum for your daddy, show me I’m yours, I can only make you feel this good, only me,” he said and with your eyes almost closed, you had desperately nodded your head, obedient as hot tears trickled down your skin while your hot cum laced around his width.

 “Good girl,” he cooed before kissing you once more, his length digging deeper into your sex as his sac had swelled, frantic to cum inside you the man had continued to push himself, the wetness of both your sexes echoing inside of your room just as he cummed inside of you, his hot load seeping deep inside, coating your walls and cervix with his nectar as he released one tight grunt. “There you go,” he whispered before pulling out of you.

Exhausted you had heavily breathed, eyes almost shut you could feel Ghost swipe his thumb against your lower lip. “Still mad at me?” He asked.

“No,” you replied.

“Good girl.”

a compilation of what i think is ghost's favourite position

pussy eating reference :)) and if it doesnt work use vpn

[misfithive]

Thank you for the way you handled that ask about Wille's and Simon's drama. Because that sentence 'On the other hand, Simon needs to have a bit of more drama thrown at him' made me so furious. It was so insensitive! The fact that he suffers in silence and alone in his room not to bother other people doesn't mean he doesn't suffer enough and needs some more! The fact that he didn't jump on the table or say he feels like dying doesn't make his experience any less traumatic than Wille's. What he needs is to process his trauma rather than brushing it aside, not to get some more.

Once again thank you, you put it all beautifully.

Yes 😭 this is a very common hope for Simon to get pushed to the point of a breakdown but it’s like .. at what cost?😩 He has been thru enough trauma for a lifetime and a half. And the thing is, most people cannot actually stop and process the trauma if they are constantly being hit with more. I think we are more likely to get simon opening up if he is able to find safety which he did not really have. he is expected to be the strong one by everyone in his life. His friends try their best but still, telling him to rebound is the same message him mother gives him of “you are strong”. Bc they dont want him to sit with his feelings and cry (it’s uncomfortable and not the norm for them), they want him to forget about the Prince and move on. Up until s3 he has not had someone to cry to- thats why he writes his songs and holds wille’s sweater. Even when he is talking to Rosh and Ayub in the kitchen if he was actually crying to them i feel they would show it- it appears he probably cried on the way home before they came (this is my hc if yall think he cried to them u can believe that if u want)

i think Simon’s character is very accurate to what a lot of men, people socialized as men, and also people of color experience and how we deal with our emotions. I get that for a lot of people it is cathartic to sob but for many of us, crying like that especially in front of someone else is terrifying. we are conditioned that letting other people see u in that vulnerable state is a weakness (puts you in danger or will be used against you & that anger is safer). I know some men who have not cried since they were children and told me they dont even remember what it feels like to cry or how to actually let the tears fall from their eyes. It is messed up. Is that fair? No. Is it true that it is a weakness? No. But not everyone learns that. The patriarchy sucks and harms us all lol i wish people would understand that and have empathy for the deep sadness that simon is carrying and hiding whether he lets it out or not.

Not to mention everyone deals with their trauma differently and i think it is cool that the show is realistic and shows people dealing with things in different ways. Simons character is relatable bc of this and instead of people saying “it’s not fair that Wille gets to express himself in this way and Simon doesn’t” i want people to think about WHY Simon is not be able to. I know wanting simon to cry comes from a good place but it does upset me a little bit bc even if he doesnt have a breakdown s3, that doesnt mean that the writers hate him and arent doing his story justice which is what people say abt s2. At the same time, if he does have a break down, that would be totally warranted. i'm just saying that if it doesn't happen that's valid too.

THAT BEING SAID. I think s3 is a great opportunity for Simon to hear from Wille that he doesnt always have to be strong and that Wille can be a reliable safe space. I think Wille’s tenderness is something that Simon sees and now that they are on good terms and Wille has worked to rebuild the trust, I hope Simon will turn to Wille for emotional support however that looks.

Ermmmn I’m very sorry that this turned into a dump but i had to get it off my chest.(made a few edits for clarity and spelling mistakes bc i posted this in the middle of the night)

[nkirukaj]

I Want You, Simon

So here’s the deal, I’m in love with Simon Petrikov and I need more content of him existing in a romantic sense, so I’m writing a multi-part fic.

Pairing: Simon Petrikov x Fem! OC

Warnings: implied sexual feelings I guess?

Genre: Angst and Fluff I guess?

Word Count: 1.07k

(Sorry, I’ve never done this before lol)

Simon Petrikov was tired. Traveling the multiverse trying to save the world of his new adopted daughter and looking for the love of his life that had become a cosmic deity, Simon didn’t really know what to do with himself on th regular. He spent all this time being poked and prodded at his work/home, and since having weekly meetings with the Minerva bots, and moving to a more secluded area; he noticed that his restored sense of self didn’t cure his loneliness. Maybe it had something to do with him not leaving the house after moving, and not calling anyone? Eh, probably not, right? Everyone has their own issues to deal with, they didn’t need to be burdened with his.

Sitting on his couch finally watching something other than ‘Cheers’ is where he was when he got a call from his first adopted daughter, Marceline.

“Simon!” she said in that same warm tone she always used when speaking to him, it always made him smile

“Hi Marcy,”

“So I’m performing at the Candy Tavern tonight, you gotta come see me!”

“Of course Marcy, I wouldn’t miss it for anything!

“Great, I’ll have a surprise for you when you get there!”

“A surprise? Wait Marcy hold on-”

“K bye Simon, see you there!”

He slunched down into his couch knowing that whatever she had planned for him was something he was sure would throw him for a loop.

Walking through Ooo was a new experience every time he did it. On this walk, he noticed a butterfly with a happy face on it. It filled him with a sense of comfort, seeing it flutter.

When he arrived, he slipped through the crowd towards the bar and ordered his usual. Of course he was willing to support Marceline in any way that he could, but he wasn’t feeling as social lately. He scans the crowd to see all types of beings, non-humans and humans alike. After all this time, he still felt slightly out of place. Through the busy noise of the packed tavern and the dim lights, Simon was able to focus on the spotlit stage, and the sound of a finger tapping on the mic, center stage.

“Hello Candy people! You all know me! I’m Marceline the Vampire Queen”

Many cheers are heard throughout the venue “But for the first time ever, I will be performing with the wonderful and talented Samira!”

Simon’s eyes darted over to the woman ascending the stage stairs. Short with long, curly, black hair, brown skin and…thick. She wore a neon green crop top, with a slightly longer orange cropt top underneath, jean shorts and a black wired necklace.

“Hi, I’m Samira, you might know me, but I’m here to sing a Pre-Mushroom War song, backed up by the one and only Marceline!” Her voice was rich and smooth, not soft, but with a bit of a raspy quality that made her seem hard, while her words made her feel soft.

Simon’s eyes were wide and fixated on this mystery woman.

“Who is that?”

“Dude, she just said her name,”

Simon did not respond, only kept his eyes on this woman with a thickness he had never experienced.

“So let’s get this started!” Marceline shouted before strumming on her axe bass.

An employee removes the mic stand and Samira presses on her necklace and her voice echoes throughout the venue.

Welcome to your life

There's no turning back

Even while we sleep

We will find you

Acting on your best behaviour

Turn your back on Mother Nature

Everybody wants to rule the world

She sways her body to the music and his eyes can’t help but follow.

It's my own design

It's my own remorse

Help me to decide

Help me make the

Most of freedom and of pleasure

Nothing ever lasts forever

Everybody wants to rule the world

Thick, thick, thick. That’s all that was running through his mind. He felt his face go hot and his throat fill his collar. He tried loosening it with his finger, but it did not help. What is going on?

There's a room where the light won't find you

Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down

When they do, I'll be right behind you

So glad we've almost made it

So sad they had to fade it

Everybody wants to rule the world

I can't stand this indecision

Married with a lack of vision

Everybody wants to rule the—

Say that you'll never, never, never, never need it

One headline, why believe it?

Everybody wants to rule the world

All for freedom and for pleasure

Nothing ever lasts forever

Everybody wants to rule the world

The music fades out slowly and Samira stands center stage with Marceline as they bow together.

“Goodnight y’all!” Marcy shouts at the crowd

with another strum of her ax bass. Samira waves at the crowd and descends the stairs. Marceline plays her out.

“I love you Samira!!” Candy people shout “Samira!!”

Samira navigates the crowd, walking closer towards Simon, and he turns his face to hide the red overtaking it. She walks past him, slightly bumping his shoulder and doing a double take towards him that he doesn’t notice. And exiting the venue. Simon shivered from the touch. He lifts his head slowly reeling from either the performances or the drinks.

“So what’d you think Simon?” Marcy threw her arm around Simon’s shoulders

“Who was that?” He turned toward her and ran his hand through his hair

“Dude,” said the same Candy Person from before, “Is this guy listening?”

Marceline laughs “Who, Samira? She’s a friend of mine from the Human City. Surprised you’ve never seen her. I’ve been teaching her old songs but this is the first time I’ve played with her. She’s a really great singer, right?”

“Well yeah, but she’s so-“ he cuts himself off from not knowing what words to say

Marcy smirks and raises an eyebrow “She’s so what Simon?”

He shakes his head, as though to clear it. “Nevermind. I have to go. Great show.” He later Marcy on the back then scurries out the door.

The cool air greets him like an old friend, he basks in it, cleansing himself of the thoughts he’d had just a minute prior. After his fourth or fifth exhale, he felt a slight weight on his shoulder, and as he glanced at it, saw the same butterfly from earlier.

Chapter 2

[mysticalsoot]

This is it, this is what joy feels like, doesn't it?

A/N: this was meant as my gift to my valentine for Grey's Valentine's Exchange but since it has been cancelled I decided to quickly finish it up and dedicate it to not only grey because they need it with how rough the exchange ended up being but also my new found friend on here! I'm really proud of this and Im very surprised at how much I wrote in such little time (5k is a lot okay lol) I hope you all enjoy it and happy early Valentine's! (I'm still gonna post a special Valentine's blurb!)

Pronouns: they/them, uses of y/n

Pairings: Cc!Wilbur x Reader

Summary: Wilbur and Reader have known each other since their early teens, and despite having painfully obvious feelings for the other, they ignore them in the sake of saving their friendship. James concocts an outing for the two and maybe it goes according to plan?

Warnings: swearing, angst but with a ton of fluff at the end! also there is a kiss but not detailed bc I in fact have never been kissed so I'm going off gut feeling lmao. also mentions of alcohol and drinking (I've also never drunk alcohol so I don't know much about that either so another guessing game there too).

Words: 5.3k

Dedicated to: @grey-rambles @loverboy-soot

masterlist

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James had invited Wilbur, Ash, Tommy, Rue, and you over to his place to hang out. It was mostly Mario Kart and James fucking screaming the Wario sound, but it was fun. There was food and a few rounds of uno with Ash, Tommy, and Rue, but despite all the festivities, Wilbur hadn't joined in any of them. He sat in the farthest corner from you and the rest of the group, the corner of James' loveseat didn't seem very comfortable anyhow. But there he sat, hands folded and rested between his thighs, his eyes darted from the group to the wall, to the TV, and back to his lap. He seemed so dazed like he wasn't fully there in the moment like he was somewhere else.

The absence of his laugh and his smile...and his voice, concerned you. It wasn't like him to isolate himself like this, it was one thing to stop answering messages and hiding in his flat but straight out isolating himself at a social gathering was nothing like him. You wanted to find him in his corner, bring him away from the others and ask him what was wrong, what you did every time he found himself anxious and shutting down. But every time you tried someone would pull you away, ask questions or bring you into banter. Staring at him, contemplating doing something wasn't helpful so maybe engulfing yourself in the festivities around you would help. It was selfish, yes, but there wasn't much you could do. The chances of him brushing it off and saying he was fine and completely ignoring the subject at hand were much more probable than him stepping aside and delving into his anxieties with you. So you pushed it aside and focused on whatever shit James and Tommy were debating about at this point.

“James,” Tommy pauses for emphasis, his hands folded in front of his face and eyes closed, “You are one deaf fucking bastard.”

“I’m hearing you! I’m just saying your point is invalid and ill-informed!” James counters, despite the possible hostility of their bickering, it's known by everyone that it's just light-hearted poking and prodding at each other, nothing substantial to be worried about.

Something you could slip away from easily…

“Says the man who is convinced that the creeper is the elite hostile mob in Minecraft?? It blows shit up and is extremely difficult to kill at the start of the game! The true elite mob is the zombie, they are slow and easy to hit.” Tommy then stands up and his face plastered with a smug smile. He knows he's right even if the topic at hand is trivial and childish at best.

"You're an asshole, Thomas Simons. I'm right, you're wrong." James is quick to poke at him, and you catch a small, soft smile forming on Wilbur's features. He's gazing at the chaos in front of you, no longer on his jeans or the spots on the wall. It's on the people now. His friends.

The thought brings a glimpse of hope to you, maybe it's just a fluke and he's okay. Nothing to worry about, he's not being self-destructive right now. It's okay.

It wouldn't hurt to get him to join the conversation, would it? "What do you think, Wil? Who's the most elite hostile mob?" You pose the question with a smile on your face, eyes locked on his, gauging how he was feeling by the way his eyes went wide and his mouth opened to speak but nothing came out. Anxious, noted, not anything new and revolutionary but something to note when speaking to him.

"Um, Skeletons I guess?" His answer is unsure and it's probably because he wasn't really listening in the first place, just observing his friends having fun and bickering, doing anything he can to keep his mind off the anxiety dwelling in his head.

“Skeletons? That is the most basic bitch answer! Also, it’s invalid because they can shoot you from sixteen blocks away!” Tommy counters his answer and he gets riled up again, rushing to pull up some sort of resource list as if this was a school assignment.

Wilbur’s face drops again, but his eyes are still trained on the group as they begin bickering again. Rur and Ash decided to chime in this time, both with their own very opinionated thoughts on the matter. It began to get tenser, despite the laughs and smiles, the abrupt yells were enough to push anyone already on edge even further.

It was best to get him out of there, even if it was for a moment. So you stood from your spot at the sofa to walk over to where Wilbur placed himself. Pushed into the corner of the loveseat farthest from the group. Now that you're closer, you notice how straight he's sat, his whole body is tense and his face is flushed.

You put your hand out to him, an offering, “Come on, Wil,” It’s muttered as a mere whisper, but he hears it. His head tilts up to look at you, eyes still wide and overflowing with unease.

“Okay,” He whispers, taking your hand in his and standing up from his own spot. His shoulders slouch, making him seem slightly shorter --- he still towers over you, but it makes him seem vulnerable and small.

You tighten your grip on his hand, in a comforting way and lead him out of the living room, through the hall, and into the dark kitchen. No one seems to notice the absence of either of you, they're too busy arguing over a block game to think about much else. He lets your hand go after the door is closed and he goes to sit on the floor in the corner of the room against the kitchen cabinets. Wil pulls his knees up to meet his chin and he wraps his arms around his legs.

“Are you okay?” You slide down the cabinet to sit next to him, your hand resting on his knee drawing circles with your thumb.

“Mmm, ‘m fine.” He mumbles, his head between his knees and his face hidden.

“As your best friend, I do not believe that.” You try to lighten the mood, be playful in hopes he’ll at least crack a smile.

“I’m fine.” He lifts his head and looks to you, despite how hard he tries it's not convincing.

“Yeah, yeah, and the queen’s alive. Come on, Wil.” You laugh, moving to card through the curls atop his head.

"I'm okay." He tries to fake a smile to rid your concerns but it's not that easy anymore.

"You don't have to tell me, but you can admit when you're not okay, love." The pet name was merely a slip for you and when you noticed you used it, you wanted to crawl into yourself. Hideaway and forget everything you said. Surely to others, it's not a big deal but it's not like you can give any hint at your feelings for him, feelings you know aren't reciprocated.

He simply hums in response with his head back between his knees, and you take your hand away from his hair and drop it on your lap. You want to help him, make him feel better but this is making you feel so hopeless. You can't let him wallow but he's stubborn, it's not easy to get through his shell.

"Wanna tell me about the French Revolution?" The question was merely a suggestion, a bribe to get him to speak in more than two words per sentence.

And it worked, his head lifted up almost immediately and his eyes were wide with excitement, "Really? Are you sure?" His voice is soft but you can practically hear the joy in the way he spoke.

"Of course, tell me all about it." As you mutter the last bit, you lean your head against the cabinet and gaze up at him. His smile is wide and he's now let his knees fall to where his legs are stretched out in front of him. Stupid lanky bastard.

"Okay so, the revolution of 1789 had maaany different causes, primarily economical and political," And so he went on for what felt like hours, but you enjoyed the chatter. You liked seeing him so giddy and happy over something he loved like this. He's an absolute history buff and most people don't care to sit still long enough to listen, except for his brother, you, and sometimes Ash. So you let him talk your ear off, you asked questions, and let him tell you all the little details and factoids he's learned over the years.

After a while, your eyes began to droop and feel heavy, and you kept having to pull your head back up to keep yourself awake. So you settled with resting your head on Wilbur's shoulder as he continued telling you about one of the many corrupt French kings. You wrapped your left arm around his middle and your right hand rested on the shoulder you laid on. You were comfortable and he didn't seem to mind the contact.

"Sleepy?" He breaks his info dump and runs his hands through your hair. You were far too drowsy to think twice about the action or to get nervous about it as usual, so you just hummed and nuzzled further into him.

"Keep talking." Your words were muffled by his sweater but he understood, and so he did just that. He continued on about the revolution and everything that came after before he himself began to doze off. His head leaned against yours and before he knew it, he was passed out too.

----

"Hey, has anyone seen Wilbur?" James chimed in, the Lion King plays on the TV, and everyone groans, and Tommy pauses the movie.

"Dude, it was the best part!" Tommy exclaims and dramatically throws his head onto the back of the couch.

"Sorry! Wil just disappeared, so I was just wondering if anyone saw him." James reiterates, hands in the air in surrender before dropping them to the floor on either side of himself.

"I'm sure the guy's fine, he's probably somewhere with his best friend anyways," Rue reassures James, her arms crossing over her chest.

"Those two are inseparable," Ash adds.

"And they are so obvious too! It's annoying." Tommy grunts in that typical little sibling way.

James frowns, clearly not satisfied with how calm and not worried his friends are. Ash notices and pats his friend on the back, and James' shoulders slump.

"Dude if you're so worried about them, go find them." Rue leans against the back of the couch, crossing her ankles and resting them on the coffee table. James growls and shoves her feet off the table, Rue then rolls her eyes. "So mean.."

“Fine, I will.” James groans and lifts himself off the floor where he sat and he as well makes his way out of the living room. He heads through the hall, peaking into the dining room; nothing. He checks the guest bed next, also nothing; and then his office, still nothing. He checks every room before he settles on checking the kitchen- the last spot he expected to look. The moment he peaks his head through the door he catches a glimpse of both you and Wilbur cuddled against each other, sound asleep.

“Aww, cute,” Rue whispers behind James and he jumps, yelling a slew of curses at his friend. She simply laughs in response. James looks back to be sure the interaction didn't wake the two of you, and surely it didn't. He would have never been so thankful for how heavy of sleepers you two were.

James backs away from the door, being sure to close it as slowly and quietly as possible, and then he ushers Rue down the hall and back to the sitting room where the rest of their friends were. He then happily plops down onto his sofa, right next to Tommy.

“So, are they okay?” Ash’s expression is one of concern, but calm still.

“Oh they're fine,” James takes a swig of the drink he left on the coffee table, “But we have some matchmaking to do.”

----

“We’re meeting at the pub around the corner, that's right, James?” The entire situation is confusing and getting a confirmation out of James is the worst hell that you desperately want to crawl out of.

"Yes, yes, that pub. I told you like ten times already." James sighs in a loud obnoxious way and if it weren't for the fact you loved him, he would be dead on sight. Or on sight when you both got to the damn pub.

"It's not my fault you give shitty instructions and clarification!" You do your best to whisper yell through the phone, he may annoy the fuck out of you but you don't hate him, and if he lost his hearing because of you—you couldn't mess with him.

"Oh my god, stop whining and get your ass over here." You're about to snap back at him and then he hangs up just as quickly as the words roll off his tongue.

You groan and drag your feet on the sidewalk, desperate to make your trek longer so you can postpone seeing James a little more. I mean, you love him but fuck can he be an annoying little shit sometimes. He's really good at it too and you don't know how he manages it.

Unfortunately, you're in front of the pub way quicker than you thought you would be. You're quick to open the door, and rush in before you push through the crowd to find any inkling of where your friends have situated themselves. James didn't mention which table the rest of their friends sat at, so you assumed he didn't know either seeing as he was on his way here as well.

You're about to give up when you spot a familiar Pinterest hipster across the pub. Wilbur is sat alone at a booth, holding what seems to be a simple water as he himself eyes the tables and bar as well as the sea of people standing around the place.

You smile and wave your hand at him, signaling that you're there. He smiles too, waving back and then gesturing for you to sit with him. You're quick to shuffle through the people surrounding you, muttering excuse me and I'm sorry's whenever you bump into someone or get just a hair too close to them. By the time you reach the booth, you're out of breath from swimming through the crowd. You plop down on the spot next to Wil and you rest your head face first on the table.

"Why is James so annoying?" You pose the question, all muffled and not really meant to be answered, simply spoken into the void.

"Hell if I know, he told me the rest of the group was here but I couldn't find them." Wilbur speaks in such a nonchalant way that you would think he did this often, wait for his friends to be there and either be late or not come at all. But you know he doesn't do this often, I mean it was more common in middle school and high school, but now he's an adult and you know his current friends wouldn't do that. I mean you're his best friend after all, you notice way more about him than you would care to notice.

"So you think they've ditched us?" You move your head to face him, eyes looking up to him and his own looking down at you. You swear you could see a smile forming on his lips.

"Hah, maybe." He laughs and then switches to gaze at his hands resting in his lap.

You lift your head up, and lean against the back of the booth. You rest a hand on his shoulder and he looks to you, "You're my favorite anyway." You pat his shoulder before removing your hand only for it to find great interest in the sleeves of the jacket you wore out today. One of Wilbur's old jackets his arms were too long for. It's oversized but it's comfortable and a hundred percent smells like him, so it's comforting.

"Ash isn't even your favorite?" He's smirking now and you can tell he's almost completely forgotten about James and the clan.

"He's a close second." You throw a soft smile to him and you can feel your cheeks warm and turn red.

———

"Wow, France is fucking shitty." You let out a soft laugh, taking a sip of whatever alcoholic beverage was the special—you didn't care, it tasted good and didn't burn horribly so it did just fine for you.

"I know!" Wilbur slurs and then laughs, throwing his head back to lean against the back of the booth. He turns to face you, smile wide and face pink from being a bit too tipsy.

"You're smart, Wil. You know that?" You rest your chin in your hand and look in his eyes. You never really noticed how rich and…deep they were. It was endearing to look at.

"Not really, I just know a lot." He shrugs, gaze dropping and face draining from positivity.

"Isn't that the definition of smart?" You reach your hand out to rest against his arm. He doesn't move or flinch. It's like your touch is second nature.

There's a silence, he doesn't say anything, you don't say anything. Your friends still aren't here and it's been an hour and a few drinks in—you're beginning to wonder what James' intentions were.

"They ditched us didn't they?" You lean your own head against the backboard.

"Oh they sure as hell did." Wilbur lets out a soft chuckle and the sight makes your heart flutter.

"Wanna go back to mine?" The question is simple and you play with the idea of looking away from him, to dull the sting if he says no—or rejects you without even admitting anything to him—but you decide to turn your head and gaze upwards at him.

A soft smile, a breathy laugh, he turns his head to face you, "Of course,"

It takes a good twenty minutes to get back to your flat, which is only a ten minute walk from the pub James tricked the two of you to go into, but with both of your slighter drunken states, it was safe to say it took a lot longer. Stumbling, giggling, slurred speech, a hand on the small of your back, your arm around his torso. There was no such thing as a ten minute walk on your minds.

The walk down the cobble path to the door of your flat is a tricky one. Wilbur only had a few shots but he hadn't been drinking in a while so his ability to handle much alcohol was severely lacking at the moment—so he was stumbling a lot. He nearly fell in the bush a few times but you were able to keep your grip on him, keeping him steady. You yourself weren't in the best of shape either, but you managed. Surprisingly neither of you had felt the least bit nauseous yet, which was a tremendous thing.

You struggled a few moments with your keys before Wilbur got off the wall where he leaned and said, "Here, lemme try." He was quick to find the right key and turn it in the keyhole. The door clicked and Wilbur turned the door knob and pushed it open. He stepped aside and bowed, his right arm over his stomach and his left out stretched in a gentlemanly manner. "Royalty first, as always." You smile and are sure your laugh is heard by the man.

"Why, thank you kind sir!" You exclaim, folding your hands like a queen in a ball gown and dramatically walk in the door. He laughs and follows you in, closing the door and locking it behind him.

You lead him to the living room just to the left in the corridor and curl up on the couch and shove your shoes off your feet. Wilbur follows and does the same, his head next to yours and his legs curled up next to him.

"Hi," He whispers to you, smiling softly and gaze set up on you.

"Hi," you pause, readjusting your legs to be held against your chest. "I'll take the couch, you take the bed, that cool?" Your eyelids begin to feel heavy and so you rest them, unable to spot the reaction Wilbur gave you.

"No, not cool." He states plainly, your eyes shoot open. Did you upset him? What did you say wrong? Your mind runs wild and he seems to notice your anxiety bubbling. Your slightly tipsy self, not doing a great job at hiding it. "I take the couch, you take the bed."

"No, you take the bed, I take the couch."

"Darling," He warns and the pet name shocks you both, and it seems as though the alcohol has an effect on both of your filters, his and yours.

"I said what I said and I stand by it!" You cross your arms over your chest and playfully move to look away from him.

He groans in an artificial annoyance and you smile to yourself.

"How about this," He begins and you turn back to face him, he's sat up now, legs pulled up to his chest still. "We both take the bed? That way we both win."

"Mmm, as long as you're okay with it, I am."

Wilbur smiles and nods, "It was my brilliant idea, now wasn't it?" A smirk forms.

"Goddamn, you and your stupid ego." You roll your eyes and Wilbur huffs.

"Oh shut it." He snaps back, going to stand and walk out the door and across the hall to the bedroom. You follow him and quickly go to the cupboard on the left beside the door. Your bed is prepared to warm one person, not two, so you need extra blankets and maybe another pillow or two.

"Dude, when's the last time we shared a bed?" You break the silence, chuckling to yourself as you hear Wilbur shuffle around the bathroom—presumably to find his old toothbrush he left at your place that one time he stayed for a week six months ago.

"Like the last time I stumbled to your door drunk as fuck?" He sighs before exclaiming an Aha presumably because he found the toothbrush he was looking for.

"You really need to stop drinking that much, especially alone. I'm not always gonna be here to be a pick me up for your sorry ass." You throw the blankets you pulled out onto the bed and jumped in face first. "So comfy." It's meant as a whisper, but Wilbur manages to pick it up.

"Save some blankets for me, meanie." He turns on the faucet and he's then silent for a moment before the sound of brushing sounds from the bathroom.

"No, they're mine. I bought them with my money, dickwad." You grunt and turn over, wrapping yourself in a little blanket cacoon.

Wilbur lets out a laugh, and the faucet sounds again before the tapping of the toothbrush on the side of the sink. Before you know it, the other side of the bed dips and you feel a blanket being snatched from you. You don't have the energy to fight it, so you let it go.

"Wow, my best friend being generous to me? What world do we live in.." He mutters, laughing more to himself than anything.

"Too tired to care."

"Not because you love me? Oh my heart!" He dramatically clutches his heart and lets out a breathy chuckle.

"Only because tired." Your words become more slurred and they're muffled by the pillow you have your face in.

"Yeah, yeah." He sighs, and then tosses around a few times, getting comfortable. The bed creaks with his every move and you can hear him groan in annoyance at the sound.

The creaking stops, and Wilbur stops moving. He's situated now, but he's on his back staring at the ceiling.

Many thoughts run through his mind but one in particular stands out; Should I tell them?

The concept is foreign, expressing undiscussed emotion that could be detrimental information if provided at the wrong time—it's scary. What is he meant to do? Lye around and pretend he didn't get nervous at your touch, or your pet names or the way you willingly am letting him sleep next to you—and while the latter wasn't unusual in the past, it was now, given the two of you being in your early 20s and having been avoiding sleepovers since you turned 18. Although there was only so much you could do when Wilbur came stumbling to your door pissed out of his mind.

He bit the bullet. What's the worst that could happen? A Lot actually.

But he figured he should give context first, background.

"Do you know why I was sulking that day at James'?" He breaks the comforting silence that fell between you two. He doesn't mind it but he figured he must act now before he chickens out.

"I figured you were just having a bad day, and once I offered a France info dump you seemed pretty okay. Was there something I missed?" You turn your head back to face him, eyebrows knitted in genuine—sober—concern.

"I was upset," He pauses, beginning to place the pieces in his mind of what to say next and then after that and then after that and so on. "It's kind of stupid, I guess-"

You cut him off, "Nothing, and I mean nothing you say is stupid, Wil. I promise." You're sitting up now, crisscrossing applesauce on the bed, your body facing him but your eyes trained on his own eyes. "What was wrong?"

He closes his eyes, "I guess, I was getting sort of fed up with myself. See, I really really like this person—" He pauses to sit up himself, he gazes down at you as he leans his back against the wall. He reaches for your hand and draws circles on your palm with his thumb, his eyes painfully focused on the lines drawn in your skin. "They're wonderful, and one of my closest friends. I've liked them for a long while, love them even but a part of me knows they don't reciprocate my feelings—so I was feeling sorry for myself. It had been years and no moves had been made and so I felt hopeless. That person was so happy that day, and I was pissed I wasn't the reason for their smile." He sighs, letting go over your hand and leaning against the headboard, eyes closed shut.

Your voice is but a whisper, "Who is this mystery person?"

He hesitates for a moment, but he's this far already, there isn't any going back.

"You." The answer is simple, straightforward and blunt but it hits you hard nonetheless. Handfuls of emotion are thrown at you like confetti and you can't even begin to sift through and identify them all. You're in shock, that's for sure, but everything else? There's no telling.

You smack his shoulder, "William! You should have said sooner, you asshole!" Your tone is playful but your words would say otherwise. Elated.

"Ouch! What was that for?" He rubs the side of his arm, wincing for a split second before meeting your eyes.

"Not telling me." Frustration.

Silence, no more words slip from either of your tongues. It's simply quiet, the humming of the fan you set up hours ago, sirens sounding outside in the city —your breathing, his breathing. Fear.

"I like you too, you know." You look down, despite him already confessing to you, admitting this is still terrifying, and odd to you.

"Oh, I know." He smiles, and you mentally smack yourself for saying something you know would get some stupid snarky comment.

"You and your damn ego, Soot." You shake your head, smiling fondly at him.

"Oh but don't you love my ego, my dear?" The man is still tipsy.

"Hey, why don't you shut up?" He smirks, and you immediately regret your words, well, partially — he reaches his hand up to rest on your cheek, and he brings your face closer to his, lips millimeters apart and breath fanning on each other's faces.

"Can I?" It's a simple request but you nod, smiling whilst your heart warms. He leans in closer, your own lips meeting his in a soft loving exchange.

You smile into the kiss, giggling a few times throughout. You rest your hands on the back of his neck and his own hands fall to rest on your sides.

It's not as dramatic as you imagined, figuring if he felt the same he would have some grand confession —but you like this, you really do. It's calm, private—it's tremendously better than a heated confession in the rain, at least in your opinion.

You both break apart, smiles wide as ever and you're out of breath. You lurch forward, wrapping your arms around him and your head hitting his chest, settling into him. It takes him a moment to reciprocate but when he does, his own arms snake around you, pulling you closer to him.

Wilbur's head dips down to rest on top of yours and you hum happily. This is it, this is what joy feels like, doesn't it? Warm arms around you, the sound of his beating heart—he starts to hum, what sounds like one of his songs.

The night goes on like this, the two of you wrapped around each other, Wilbur humming songs he knows or wrote and the occasional comment on how long it took you two, followed by laughter.

This was joy, he was joy.

The next day, you awoke to your phone buzzing like no tomorrow. You were groggy and really didn't want to even bother looking, but the sound managed to send you into a slight panic. Your legs were still wrapped with Wilbur's, and his head was resting on your chest and his stupidly long arms were pulling you into him. You looked over at the end table on your left and snuck your phone into your grip.

You groaned as you pressed answer on the incoming call that created your woken state. It was James.

"What do you want, James? It's 2am." Your tone is that of a very annoyed person, and James winces over the call.

"I hadn't heard from you and Wilbur's not answering his phone or his door, so I figured you two ran off and died." His words all jumbled together and you laugh much to his distaste, "Be serious here!"

"We should've run off, honestly. Maybe we would have gotten some peace and quiet then." You set your gaze down at the man with his arms around you, and you smiles sweetly.

"You're a dick—are you two okay? Do I need to send like a police force or something?" James is still frantic with how he speaks but you can tell he's calming down by the second.

"We're fine James, okay? We're at my place. We drank a little last night and my apartment was the closest." You pause, but before he can get a word in, "Thank you for setting us up." There's a smirk on your face and James can hear it in the way you spoke.

"What—I, I didn't set you up!" He's quick to his defense and you laugh.

"Yeah, no you definitely did."

"Did it work?" He asks, ditching the defensive attitude from the moment prior.

"Yeah, yeah it did. Thank you." You lean your head back, phone still pressed to your ear and your free hand carding through Wilbur's mop of curls.

"Good."

[chibishortdeath]

Ok weird opinion of mine I guess idk how to start posts aaaa

I think Simon’s “barbarian” design really works story and character wise.

Yeah, it’s silly and absolutely not historically accurate whatsoever, but it kinda makes sense in a certain weird way.

We know from Lament of Innocence and Dracula’s Curse that the Belmont family is generally on rough terms with the public. Leon gets his title taken away and, even though he gets his sword back at the end of the whole Walter situation as confirmed by how Belmonts onward have that sword, he’s still generally kinda shunned for going against the church’s wishes and the tail end of the crusades happening at the time. And Trevor is straight up banished from the country for fear of his strength. He’s much isolated from other people off in the house in the woods until he’s called to help fight against Dracula and gets some friends on the way.

And this kinda sets up the situation that the family was living in during Christopher’s time. The Belmonts are social outcasts; their existence is acknowledged, but they’re not really associated with or thought of very highly at this point. So, it wouldn’t be unlikely that they just wouldn’t really care for or be caught up with social expectations like fashion. When people are going to be wary of you regardless of what you do, why not dress however you want? Especially if you know no one’s going to do anything about it! Especially if it’s practical; the longer, looser sleeves and pant legs of the time would be restrictive in a combat/acrobatic context. So Christopher probably just wore whatever he wanted, and to be fair he doesn’t really seem to interact with anyone besides family very much.

First I wanna mention that I am completely aware that Simon was designed way before any of these other characters. But these characters are chronologically before him and can explain where he gets these design choices from in universe.

So, what about Simon then? Well, Simon has a lot of themes of wanting to be like his ancestors. Christopher is directly mentioned as someone he wonders he’ll ever compare to. Judgment shows him looking up to Trevor as well, and even though that game is of interesting canon status lol, it’s an example of that character element being used again. And this is reflected in his barbarian designs! The cape he wears in the manual drawings resembles the cape Trevor throws off in the opening of CV3. The general light armor and skimpy clothing is reflective of both some of Christopher and Trevor’s designs. The metal armor in Simon’s Quest being reminiscent in shape to Trevor’s on the CV3 box art. It just makes sense that Simon would be trying his damnedest to emulate the guys he’s been looking up and comparing himself to his whole life.

And the sudden transition from the barbarian look the family had for years to the more with the times fashion that Juste has makes a lot of sense considering Juste grew up in a time when the family was highly respected and in the middle of town, somewhere where keeping social expectations and appearances would be expected of him.

Idk if any of this makes sense, but aaaaaa random stream of an idea I guess. I like Simon getting to being weird and out of place for his time period and country lol. Also I’m not saying that other designs are bad!!! I like all of Simon’s game designs tbh, Ayami’s is really cool too and works for some of these points cause it’s also kinda barbarian esque but just in black and red, I’ve cosplayed it before lol. Yeah idk that’s it and I am sleepy goodnight—

[irish-urn]

I absolutely LOVED your response, and I agree! thanks for spending time on it <3 what draws me in about dasey is how complex it is, its forbidden love, “if its wrong I don’t want to be right”, the family dynamic, the drama, the suspense! so it’s always a let down when they hype it up so much and then nothing happens lol I want to see how dasey faces this hardship and how they present themselves moving forward. I’m so curious to hear about your after-LWL hc! I wonder how the family would react now that kids and divorce are involved. I know you’re currently writing a series about this so you don’t have to reveal too much, but how would Casey and Derek handle this as young adults? It’s not all unicorns and rainbows when dasey gets together, there’s definitely a storm coming.

LOOK, I didn't understand Taylor Swift's reputation album before I re-discovered Dasey. But now I do understand; and someone please remind me to put "But Daddy, I Love Him" on my kick at the darkness playlist because... Damn. If that isn't them.

Ohhhh Life With Luca!! You're right, I am writing a series about this — I'm actually writing, like, three parts all at once? (*hides face in shame*). The really interesting thing about the LWL world, though, is that Derek and Casey's priorities have shifted. No longer are they majorly concerned with George and Nora's opinions, but instead they're far more worried about Luca, Molly, Kai, and Skyler's opinions. And, maybe it's just me being a bit of a romantic, but I truly believe the only one of those four that would have some trouble with them getting together would be Luca: and that's because he still has a relationship with his dad. So for his mom to move on would be very painful for him to witness; but he's also very obviously fond of Derek. The six of them just really worked as a unit in the movie, and I think everyone can see that.

I strongly believe that Skyler would do everything in her power to see her dad happy; I actually HC that she figures out his feelings for Casey within weeks of them moving into the Guest House. And as for Molly and Kai -- we never see them even mention their dad, except for one instance where Kai says that "Mom and Dad don't let us swear"; and Molly tells Skyler that she wishes they could be "cousins AND sisters" -- so I think they're far more concerned with everyone being happy and them getting the attention they need than any social weirdness.

SO! With all that being said, I'm working on a part of that series where Dasey are together (because we all know that's where we're headed) and there is drama happening in the background. There's a little bit about how George and Nora did not react well -- to quote one part, "…Unfortunately, Nora and George were not handling this new relationship with any sort of grace, and there was no way they were going to take the kids so Derek and Casey could happily fuck themselves into oblivion." -- and I think Nora and George are choosing to view this relationship as a TERRIBLE REBOUND for Casey and both of them are calling Derek and Casey incredibly selfish and have they even thought about the kids?

(This, of course, made both Derek and Casey livid because, uh? George and Nora got engaged before ANY of them had met ANY of the other family; so who's considering who now???? Where they currently stand in that part of the series is that both parties are giving the other the silent treatment.)

I still think Edwin, Lizzie, and Marti would react the same way, no matter the ages. There's a little bit of concern regarding the children, but as soon as they checked in and saw that Derek and Casey are constantly checking in with the children and being as open as they can about the whole thing, I think they would just... be happy for them.

But Simon is struggling. Simon is struggling because he sees these two as his big BIG siblings, and unlike the others where blood only connects half of them, he IS connected by blood to ALL OF THEM. And, y'know, Casey has been with Peter for as long as Simon can remember -- one of his earliest memories is getting to hold baby!Luca. But Casey is so obviously happy and calmer with Derek, and Derek is happy and HOME so Simon can actually SEE him; so he's trying very hard to get on board. He fails a bit, says some things he probably shouldn't, but he's trying really, really, really hard.

I think, if he were a child, it would be easier for him to adapt. With my kick at the darkness series, for instance, he won't bat an eye — he's never going to remember a time when they weren't together, so he'll just... accept it as a part of his weird family. I'm currently playing with a sequel to "sick with sadness" as well, and he's 9/10 in that story; he finds it weird and kind of gross, but with the middle McTuris' help, he adapts quickly too. I got the sense from LWL that Simon loves Derek and Casey a whole bunch; looks up to them and trusts them, much like the younger three looked up to them in LWD. So I think love is going to win.

The fun thing is, I can actually see divorced!Casey caring a lot less about her mother's opinion about her and Derek because Casey has already been through a failed relationship, one where she tried to do the right thing -- I am a strong believer that Derek took off in LWL canon because he and Casey were teetering on the edge of the knife and someone stepped over the line and the other panicked. I suspect Derek is the one that leaned in too close or said something, and Casey FREAKED, and so he took off -- and doing the right thing didn't last. It hasn't stopped her from loving Derek, nor from him loving her. So why should she fight it any longer? She's already hurt the two of them enough; so what if Nora isn't happy? Casey is an adult living on her own, and she's tired of doing only what she's supposed to. She's going to get it right this time -- very much in the same way Nora is determined to get it right this second time too. Gosh, they really are mother and daughter, huh?

(Any other questions? I'm still not sure I really answered this one correctly...)

[priestfrommidnightmass]

(gayroman, sorry lol using my main) this is important to Me. what do you think peter maldonado and sam ecklund's letterboxd top fours are

oh my fucking GOD. i have been waiting for this moment my whole life. EVERYONE BE QUIET. apologies in advance if i get a little lost along the way i have a lot of thoughts on the way they’d consume movies and the movies they’d love individually and together so…

i don’t think peter is a Total “film bro” but i do certainly think he enjoys the pretentious more than sam does. my list of movies that i deeply believe changed the trajectory of peter’s life includes: spotlight, american beauty, phantom thread, se7en, the social network, ex machina, nightcrawler, and gone girl. spotlight came out just before av happened and i think 15 year old peter was Never the same after that. he was like oh my god i Need to do this. personally i didn’t like american beauty but i think he’s the type that would be changed by it at least when he was very young. i think he went into phantom thread expecting to not care abt it much but left thinking abt it for days and days on end and probably saw himself in it a little. se7en because. come on tell me he Wasn’t speechless after seeing that shit. same with the social network. like what do you want me to say. i think ex machina because i just do i just think he’d like it. nightcrawler because. (gestures) come on. and gone girl because i have this funny idea that sam and peter watched that together and both left changed for veryyyy different reasons. i think he’d also enjoy argo i forgot to mention that. but to answer the question of what would be in his top four… i’m gonna go with spotlight se7en nightcrawler and the social network… that feels right to me…

as for sam… i think sam has No tolerance for any of the shit peter enjoys. he’s not stupid by any means but he watches movies to have FUN ONLY!!! NONE OF THE BORING SHIT PETER LOVES!!! once on a whim i actually Did make sam’s letterboxd (ecklundmovies00 if anyone’s interested. i tell a story through that account it’s canon to me) and his actual letterboxd top four on there consists of: hot rod, the greatest showman, the lego batman movie, and spiderman 3. it just feels So right to me. it’s just true. honorable mentions to pitch perfect i think he’d love it very much and i believe he left 2018 forever changed after seeing love simon and call me by your name i think he certainly had a lot to unpack that year.

bonus thoughts i think they both force each other to watch movies the other Hates (peter often telling sam he doesn’t take things seriously and can’t recognize good cinema and sam complaining that peter hates fun and only loves boring shit.) however they do find some things they agree upon. one movie they can agree upon is clerks. peter likes it from a filmmaking standpoint and sees it as admirable since it was made on such a low budget and sam likes it because he thinks it’s funny and kind of wishes he could be randal. one of the Greatest truths i’ve decided on is that their one joint cinematic voice is the movie hot rod. it’s so shitty and yet anytime they need to distract themselves from the world they turn it on they’ve seen it together easily 15+ times. because of this they were also some of the only supporters of popstar: never stop never stopping when it came out. documentarians have to support documentarians! i also think they watched all of sherlock together and had a massive obsession with it they were using that av room to pick apart tjlc I KNOW IT! i also think they enjoyed seeing the most recent star wars trilogy and recent james bond movies together in theatres. i don’t know how much they enjoyed the movies themselves but they loved the ritual. but other than that there’s very little middle ground. can you tell i’ve been dying to talk abt this lmfao sorry. did that answer your question

[you-remind-me-of-the-babe]

Director’s Cut for A Prickly Disposition 🙏

Prickly Disposition, my beloved. Thank you for this ask! 🥰

I wrote this fic in January 2022. I had reblogged this list of love confession prompts and had received 4 prompts via 5 asks (one was a repeat) for ficlets using some of the chosen love confessions. Looking back, I reblogged the list on January 24 and by January 29 I had four fics published on AO3 (though they appeared on tumblr first) totaling roughly 6k. That is amazing to me, especially as I am currently trudging through longer WIPs that I am writing a few hundred words at a time, and sometimes deleting whole scenes when they aren’t working. Apparently words do occasionally flow! That’s a nice reminder.

So, Prickly Disposition was born from a love confession prompt from @aroace-genderfluid-sheep. The prompt chosen was: “You never believe me! If I told you right now that I love you, would you even believe me?”

I had been responding to asks one night at a time, and was pretty pleased that I had been able to write a short 1-2k fic in one night, let alone 3 in a row. This one, however, took two nights. I had first started with a canon divergent AU in which Baz had to register as a vampire with social worker Simon at the Department of Magickal Creature Management. I had been plotting my COBB at the time and when I started poking at that idea, I realized that story had the potential to be much longer and in depth. Fast forward nearly a year and a half later and I am still chipping away at Depth of Reason, lol.

So, I put that idea aside, went to bed, and started fresh the next night on this prompt. Somehow, the line “you never believe me” called out to me, and made me think of a much older vampire Baz who had lived a long time and never really felt loved. Ouchie. Cue barista Simon confessing his love to his surly cafe regular, bursting into Baz’s sad, monotonous existence with his ray of sunlight. The fic wrote itself from that point.

I liked the idea of it being a magickal cafe so Simon would already know Baz was a vampire. I also chose to have no magic in this fic. It’s pretty ordinary, Baz is just in his routine getting coffee and reading or writing by the fire and Simon has a goal to break through his walls. This was also only the second time I had tried my hand at writing in third person. The first time had been one of the other ficlets I wrote a night or two before, so it was still very new to me. This fic remains one of my favorites. I like that it tells a whole story with a get together in less than 2k. I had always been impressed at writers who could do that before this (I’m still impressed) and I had never managed to write anything under 7k at that point. So this was a proud moment for me.

Thanks, Stacy, for indulging me and letting me talk about this fic! (And a few others I through in here.) 💛

[castle-dominion]

castle 6x13 limelight

the doppelganger vicarious mom episode liveblog

Love the music

hate parapazzi.

what's with her eyeliner? I mean I like it. "She had spinach in her teeth" More material to torture you with *rawr chomp chomp*

Pi lol but also oof 7am work I love pi Hi! Bye! Unless that's a murder XD Poor girl on call before 7am

"this isn't about me today" love esposito's scarf & becked's jacket

Oof manager first mother second. (she's more than the personal assistant she seems a little bit gay for mandy)

Talk to the security firm then

don't get drunk babes...

Oh four months...

construction my beloved

this kid is too bright eyed to be in construction

How old is this guy to be with a 22yo? Oh he's an artist.

Love lanie's scrubs over her long sleeve.

Oh wow claire samuels. WAIT CASTLE'S JACKET-- THAT'S THE ONE ETHAN SLAUGHTER GETS & also eckett's outfit is nice

Oof place is trashed!

Lol the blood wine "closing time?" girl you're at your hotel room!

Don't even know claire's name?

Good point. Mom: It wouldn’t make much sense to have a decoy if they’re going to be seen hanging out together.

she's not wrong but she's kinda bitchy. she's also hungover so yk.

"probably???"

"youve" worked hard

Ryan reminds me a lot of simon tam rn. kinda twinky looking in comparison to the ppl around them but when you actually look at them they have good shoulders

But I don't think I like his vest

Castle is so great making her a cup of good coffee

RC: How do you feel? Mandy sutton: Considering I’m supposed to be dead – (she gives him a wry look) – about right. .. On a much smaller scale

Alexis my beloved put down her phone on the table

Mandy smiling at that but then alexis turns around

Jim thinking caskett broke up I love it

Ok so I'm leaving for the week & this is it. I'll have one week after this to watch the rest of Castle. I have spent what like four months watching Castle? doing my liveblogging? My entire summer. & now... back to school. Kill me.

HEYY I'M BACK UWU

Claire Samuels

Lol stalkerazzi

RC: They may already have, which is why we can’t find her.

Closing time already? XD

Castle should make her a coffee

You know it makes sense for claire & mandy to not know each other

"socializing"

Did you upset anyone? Probably?

HOLD ON THAT'S WHY I FEEL LIKE I'VE SEEN THIS BEFORE-- I HAVE!

ok fastforward except Who DID take the photos?

Jim beckett <3 AUnt Theresa CD

Love ryan's fingers & physicality

Woah why r they busting in here all gunned up? lol beaded curtain

You ok? Yeah. *giant wall of Mandy*

This man is,, unwell

I like how he says "just the motorcycle" as in "No I didn't see anyone, except a motorcycle" or "yes but no more than a motorcycle"

Reminds me of that autiistic timepiece kid in murdoch

Esposito waving, jenkins by the door, ryan's voice so deep rn...

Alexis totally did this on purpose lol Yay bees yay kiss!

Alexis so awkward lol.

Ah alcoholism

In some way, not exactly how you feel bro

RC: It took me less time to write the last Derrick Storm novel and though both are works of fiction at least that one was believable. How’s the case coming?

Love how Ryan corrects the picture being sideways. (castle wearing the jacket he gives to slaughter, & it looks great with the green shirt)

lmao I love alexis talking & mandy is listenin gbut..?? I love this entire thing does alexis have any friends..?

no he THINKS you're alive MANDY NO

the advent of alexis' PI'ing

Speakerphone

Basic famous person disguise Yeah privacy pls & thx.

People gettin gthirsty over there!

DON'T GO CALLING PEOPLE! Well now that she's alive you totally could call her

with alexis lolol fire tatoo like the bike?

That's ale-- Alexis? What is she doing there?

HOLD ON THOSE PICTURES CASTLE HAS IN HIS PHONE ARE THE SAME ONES HE USED IN THE SCOTLAND YARD EPISODE

Why is alexis the one saying "let's go this way" if mandy is the one who knows the bar

*pulls a gun on them* I hope Alexis dialled her dad & left the line open.

"We thought it was you!" why do we only hear the sirens NOW? If they had the sirens on we would have heard them from far away

Listen, fool. Giffing ryan's nod

How dramatic

oOH THE MUSIC

If u'r gonna kill someone why not zack?

Castle so afraid that beckett would be mad at him

rysposito staring at caskett lol. clipping that if I have the fricking space

They TOTALLY should have gotten married a second time in the mars episode. someone write a fanfic for that

[waitingforeddyneddy]

It’s so funny when kathony stans are like “they don’t use social media like that they are never on instagram!” but they do? We see them like and comment their friends and others ALL THE TIME but very rarely for each other lately. So It’s normal that some are questioning if they are friends or not. They might be besties and we’ve been mistaken all this time but it’s also a possibility that they aren’t (and it’s fine nothing is wrong with that!) and the fact that their fans are so delulu to not see that is weird. And I agree social media is far from reality and in hindsight it means nothing since we don’t actually know them, but you can’t use instagram likes when it benefits you and your pov but not when it doesn’t it doesn’t work like that lol

The excuse they use is the algorithm LMAO!

Seriously tho I never said my version is the official truth and everybody should bow down to me but I’m also kinda fed up of this non existent bestie thing. I’m fed up of people trying to police the fandom experience and of bullies who call you bigot, homophobic and racist just because you don’t agree with them or that if i’m not desi I shouldn’t be talking about Simone. I’m fed up. A troll yesterday, who never posts anything about her, published her photo with JB like as a gotcha moment. Imagine only talking about Simone to prop up your fave. Ew.

They’re screaming and crying about me being a bigot and when I ask them why they say it’s not because I don’t like him. So why since I never talked about his sexuality? They don’t even know what they want. They’re just salty I got the balls to burst they fantasy world. They’re calling me jobless but know everything I’m saying here even if they blocked me or I blocked them. They’re saying I want to speak for Simone when I actually never said that wtf. I actually got some messages from JB fans agreeing with me, some even asking me not to publish cause they don’t wanna cause drama. People shouldn’t be scared of expressing their opinions even if trolls are ready to accuse you of made up stuff.

[ladyssybil]

i’m so sick of people saying that if theloise will happen eloise will be estranged from the ton because it is simply not true imo!! we all know how eloise feels about that society but still, she wouldn’t want to be left out. fortunately that is not the case. some people use this argument to explain why eloise and theo won’t be together but my point still stands: money, social status and society rules won’t be the reasons why they won’t end up together. those are just lame excuses. well, they may be if, for example, theo decides to let her go because he doesn’t feel worthy of her or something like that, but for me this is the only case. but the thing is: they could end up together.

let’s talk about the bridgerton family. we all know how much they value love, especially violet. she made this clear in the books (where she also talked about class!!),

and she made it clear in the tv show, both in s1 and s2

obviously, the head of the household is anthony. we saw, at the beginning of s2, that he’d decided to put duty above everything else but eventually he let it go and decided to choose love. and i’m sure he’ll want the same for his siblings. of course, this is a tv show, there will be conflicts, but he wants his siblings to experience his same happiness. also, mary sharma’s backstory in the show. kate’s dad. c’mon it would be VERY hypocritical to disapprove.

the queen. if she approves of something, the rest of the ton approves as well. we all remember the wrecking ball dance and how she literally meddled in the discussion, and lied lol, to avoid rumors because she saw the love between anthony and kate. of course everyone knew, even the queen, that that was, in fact, the reason why the wedding wasn’t celebrated, but in that moment it didn’t matter. she forgot about the failed wedding and watched the couple on the dance floor.

like violet, even the queen seems to love love. calam agrees with me. he said:

so i believe that if theo and eloise decide to be together and decide to do it properly, the queen would approve. i say “properly” because we all saw how the queen reacted when she saw lady mary. haters use that scene to prove their point but i want to use that scene to prove MY point. queen charlotte said:

she was mad. lady mary eloped (correct me if i’m wrong). but she did what she had to dobbecause she didn’t have the support of her family. but eloise does and the bridgertons would help her with the queen. they will help her explain the situation to her majesty. and again, the queen loves love. she was mad at simon and daph too when the engagement was announced but, let’s be honest, she loved simon’s speech. she loves to see two people in love.

so, in conclusion, social status is not what will get in the way of their relationship. i don't know what they will come up with to break them up and i hope the writers will choose the right path.

i could talk about how they’re perfect for each other and use eloise, claudia and calam’s words to explain my point and the whole marina’s situation, but that’s another story. if they have to go separate ways, i just hope they will part as friends. i don’t want them to ruin his character so that people will root for phillip.

thanks for coming to my tedtalk🫶🏻

[viscountessevie]

Part 2: What The Cast Should Have Done

READ PART 1 FIRST - IT’S THE MAIN FOCUS

First off, I would like to say I’m disappointed at myself for prematurely bringing up Jonny’s name before I had these two posts written up. I shouldn’t have done that at all. Clarifying my point again too early made it worse. Suddenly, even though my original post asked about what you all thought of Regé posting his story and his POV, my ask box was just either flooded with defending/being curious about what Jonny did or being against him for this. It completely ended up centring the conversation on Regé’s white cast mates.

This was on me for prematurely bringing up Jonny’s name and not thinking it through, and I deeply regret that. Also definitely time for us to check our bias & blindspots as always, to think about how and why we quickly started talking more about Jonny.  

That being said, here's my points along with the takeaways I’ve gotten after hearing my friends (the same ones tagged in Part 1!) out on this. A special shoutout to Triv @hptriviachamp​ who pretty much co-wrote this with me since she provided her thoughts/answers to my asks so I’ll be quoting her most of them time below. 

Okay so I’ve said this a couple times before but going to reiterate it one last time. I only placed importance on Jonny before because I don’t expect shit from the rest of them and Phoebe is already pretty much being written out of the show at this point. However that aside, the onus is not just on Jonny or Phoebe to protect their onscreen partners but the whole cast and crew could have done what ROP and Kenobi did. 

ROP made the solidarity statement seen in Regé’s story which can be found here. With Kenobi, they had Ewan McGregor, a representative of the show aka the face/star of the show, to speak out for everyone. 

From the chronically online NC to no social media Luke T/Claudia: all these people, especially white people, have the power to do/say something. Luke could find another way to communicate this. Nicola could learn and stop saying bullshit. They have interviews and live events they always do. Yt people don't know how to be allies or even what an ally is - this is very apparent in our own fandom as well. 

Now I’m bringing in my anons to further illustrate these points and expand on them!  So I've gotten a couple of different anons with conflicting views. I think it's one of those situations where both things can be true so I am putting all of them here to let them speak for themselves before elaborating: 

Triv: It’s upsetting that "they'd never do it" but we should try to hold them to a higher standard anyway

Yeah we know this, that the Production side especially the higher ups you listed along with JQ and some cast members - we all know who - perpetuate this. However, if they really wanted sell this ‘great’ “diversity is why we are set apart from other media” lie to us even more, a solidarity statement when #NotMyDuke was trending or racist hate at Simone and Charithra was being thrown, would have definitely shown the cast of colour they had the support of their show.

Production can pretend not to perpetuate it all they want, but showing that kind of solidarity and support against racist 'fans' would have gone a long way and made the cast of colour feel safer. Like Triv said it's about holding them to a higher and better standard and honestly it's THE LEAST Regé deserved especially as a lead and draw of S1. [Of course goes without saying this applies to Simone in S2 as well.]

(Also Anon I’m guessing you may have sent this ask to Mimi? We don’t have to agree with everything and that’s okay! I have friends on both sides of the Kathony subfandom and I never fully agree with any of them lol. Some like Showina a little more than I do and some dislike (putting it lightly oop) Showina a little more than I do. It’s our difference is what makes us unique and the important thing is grounding ourselves, respecting and putting each other first - anyways if this not you nor about me oops ignore this but a good side lesson for everyone nonetheless)

With this ask in particular, I understand your frustration but we really need to look at this situation through the lens of intersectionality which I can provide as a queer POC. While it's no oppression Olympics, I will say growing up I did get more racially charged abuse swung my way than I did for being queer. Then again, this is my personal experience.

I think we can all respect Jonny, his sexuality and acknowledge that he does get hate for it and call it out. At the same time, we can point out that he along with the rest of the white cast could have done more especially given their position of power with production and the fans compared to their cast of colour counterparts. I don't think these points are mutually exclusive.

Triv's take: Marginalized groups should uplift one another. I think it's wrong to expect more from Johnny specifically (it applies to everyone regardless of race or sexual orientation and white people should be allies regardless) but we should expect more from the entire cast, crew, and especially the people at the top who set the standard for the cast culture. I wasn't a big believer on the importance of "culture" in a work environment until I started mock my freshman year and the team was getting out of a very toxic era (in terms of hazing, no solidarity, and lack of diversity) and over the past 4 years I've seen that transition to a better culture because my coaches and captains are very explicit about team culture and literally make ppts about it. Culture matters.

Putting these two together because they are similar in calling out the ‘main/flagship’ actors of the show and I’ve talked about how we should be putting it on everyone already so just going to let these anons say their piece and close it off with Trivia’s take: 

That's a very interesting point about the "main people" like Coughlan and Jonny having more of a duty to uplift people of color... I'm unsure if I agree (as opposed to all of them having that duty) but I guess... it depends on how much power they actually have within the show and whether we think they inherently have more power as white people (which they do) to the extent where we should put more of an onus on them.  Real change comes in the form of the people at the top supporting them and ensuring they get promo and interviews and whatnot. It's not about the individual (Jonny, Coughlan, whatever) but about the group

Triv is absolutely right and she pretty much said it all so I don’t have anything to add on this front. 

In conclusion, I think despite Production perpetrating it, the show still should have protected Regé when the ‘fans’ were being shitty. If the cast didn’t want to bite the hand that puts them on the payroll, again they could have just called out the so-called fans. That way, it was still a show of public support and standing up for their cast mates. 

It would also have shut down the hate to a certain extent for those yts to know that their bigotry is frowned upon by their white faves. After all, they only listen to each other it seems. Maybe it may have even curbed how a lot of the fandom bigots behave on here and it would actually feel like a safer space for minority fans. However, none of that happened and we all have to live with the landscape we have now. Living with it obviously doesn’t mean we just take it lying down - we should never ever stop calling these people out. They feel uncomfortable? Good. They don’t even feel the half of what we all go through seeing them post racially ignorant bullshit ‘thinly veiled’ in their posts. 

Finally, I just sincerely hope that Regé got the support and love he deserved behind the scenes with his own circle of friends and loved ones. I hope Simone and every other future POC lead and ensemble character gets the same from their own circle since no one is publicly standing up for them - definitely not in the explicit way it needs to be done to get people to back off. 

Final note: Thank you all so much for reading and I hope the wait was worth it. This being said, writing this up took a lot out of me. I knew I was going to press pause on discourse asks for a while after posting this as I expanded on the type of posts I wanted to blog on here. However, taking about half a week to write all this and kind of stressing about it at times, made me realise I do need the break. Don’t worry I’ll still be in the drama loop reblogging asks and posts from my other friends, just won’t be making my own discussion posts for a while. Hope yall understand!

[transmutationisms]

no okay the other thing that’s so fascinating about roman’s particular eating habits. and i don’t think the show is really doing this on purpose but it’s still there so whatever. is that you do see him eating fruit, specifically, and like... fairly often, relative to the other characters. it always reminds me of those cases of ‘fasting girls’ in the middle ages and early modern period because so many of those cases will report that they only/specifically ate fruit (often berries iirc?) and they’d have all these reasons. like fruit wasn’t ‘sustenance’, so their bodies were still ‘unsullied’ by food; it was insubstantial in a way that other foods weren’t; its sweetness often recategorised it and made it not ‘count’. and then some of these girls also just had their own idiosyncratic logics about it as well

like i’m not saying roman is a medieval fasting girl, lmao, but i do think it’s an interesting window into how not-eating can be slotted into so many different cultural and social narratives, and different meanings can be made from it. fasting girls typically portrayed themselves as transcending the body (by destroying it... naturally) but also as, like, victims of their own lack of appetite. often that lack was construed as being a gift or curse from god, hence the phrase “anorexia mirabilis” (miraculous lack of appetite)

and then like, fasting girls weren’t quite the same as, eg, a catholic saint like augustine, who didn’t eat (or drink water, which some fasting girls did and others didn’t) specifically because he sought a higher spiritual pleasure than the simple bodily enjoyment of sating his hunger. he wasn’t seeking pain, per se, but he did feel that physical pleasure was at best a distraction from his worship, and at worst a self-indulgent perversion of his spiritual nature. and then augustine, in turn, wasn’t quite the same as the protestant self-denialist dietary reformers of, eg, 19th-21st century america, who often did/do seek suffering for its own sake in a very pointed way** 

and then there are others still: for example, hunger artists who starved themselves as a public art form. in kafka’s short story, the hunger artist does experience hunger and pain and misery, but also can’t find a food he likes. he’s ultimately replaced by a panther who “wants for nothing”—that is, the not-eating is relocated to a discourse of desiring. or, simone weil ‘feeding on light’ rather than food, which obviously draws from stuff like augustine but is configured with a distinct philosophical understanding of god. or even, like, chris kraus’s “aliens & anorexia” which draws from weil but is a very different attempt to speak and recreate the language of not-eating (& also ties it to sex and love and aliens... actually i think romangirls [gn] should read that book)

and then all of these are distinct from our current dsm reading of not-eating, which toggles between 1) it’s a Brain Sickness that needs a medical cure or 2) it’s an act of free will in pursuit of [control/beauty/love/etc]. and this can be traced to maudsley’s case studies, but also to the early 19th century psychiatrists (aliénistes) who laid a lot of the modern groundwork re: the stomach-brain connection, the use of force-feeding to treat various illnesses, etc

anyway like. no two people who don’t-eat are going to experience that the exact same way, but there are still these sorts of families of experiences. archetypal narratives i guess. and i do get a kick out of the thought that roman’s experience of not-eating is, at least cosmetically, a little medieval. though in his case, obviously he also has a lot of psychosexual baggage (“i eat you, you eat me”) and like a million other things going on lol

**max weber kind of sucks and this divide is more complicated and historically contingent than just catholic vs protestant but whatever

[vkelleyart]

Thoughts on fandom: inclusion and engagement.

(Art credit to the kindhearted @penpanoply​!)

There’s been some stuff floating around on Tumblr about strife in the CO/WS fandom, and though I haven’t been explicitly named-dropped on anything public, my DMs have been... active. lol Rather than rehash what’s been said already, I just want to impart a little wisdom and perspective in the hopes it may soothe frayed feelings and offer a way ahead for cultivating a respectful community. As someone who has been an active participant in online fandoms since the mid-’90s, which was the advent of online fandom content creation (shout out to my fellow X-Philes!), and who has also spent a chunk of her professional life managing social media for the federal government and for activist groups, I can promise you it’s all gonna be okay.

Here’s some context for why strife happens and what we can do to create a more inclusive and communicative fandom environment. 

1) It sounds cliché, but fandoms go through growing pains. 

In the case of the Simon Snow fandom, what was once a small and cozy space untouched by cataclysmic events (such as the release of *gasp* a sequel) has grown exponentially in a relatively short amount of time following the release of Wayward Son. Newcomers are eager to find a home in this space at the same time as folks who’ve been here a while may be consciously or unconsciously wary about widening their circle, and It’s important to remember that this is not necessarily an expression of bad behavior on either side but just human psychology doing its thing. 

The byproduct, however, is that tension and stress builds over time from the lack of meaningful communication across the divide, which subsequently fuels misunderstandings. Ironically, the interfaces we use to communicate don’t help with this because any existing communication about the tension happens in tiny vacuums until a trigger goes off and bad feelings go public. 

Way Ahead: These moments of destabilization are opportunities to see where we can be more self aware about how we engage with fandom and the kind of community we want to be. Can you promote, support, or befriend someone trying to gain a foothold? If yes, please do! Each person must reach their own decision about what they can do within the confines of their available energy, health, and time, but a little self awareness goes a long way as long as you’re honest with yourself and others if applicable about what you can contribute. Anyone who judges you for it isn’t worth the strife.

2) In a fandom comprised of vulnerable/marginalized people, it’s more accurate to say that cliques are “bubbles of trust.”

This one's important. Just by nature of the source material, the CO/WS fandom includes fans with a wide array of backgrounds and experiences, especially when it comes to those who identify with the characters’ queerness, mental illness, and/or trauma. I really believe––based on individual conversations/group chats––that the difficult lived experiences that so many of our fandom peers have endured has produced one of the most open, aware, and accepting fandoms I’ve had the pleasure of participating in. Our vulnerability is, in a real way, our strength.

That said, a community of survivors also has the side effect of cultivating small circles of engagement that I call “bubbles of trust.” When you’re a survivor of abuse, marginalization, mental illness, fill-in-the-blank, it’s often quite hard to risk casting a wide net and expanding your circle to include new faces––which can subsequently be internalized by equally sensitive and vulnerable newcomers as rejection, judgement, or inadequacy.

Way Ahead: First of all, there may indeed be gatekeeping and exclusion going on. But before internalizing someone’s cagey behavior as gatekeeping or purposely exclusionary, ask yourself if you have all the information. Many people are private (I include myself in this assessment) because life has regrettably taught them to be this way, and so they may insulate themselves to a small group of people who have earned their trust. Some people might also triggered by certain content (case in point: smut triggers my anxiety) so they don’t engage with it. Others might have something in their pasts that define how they handle certain subjects (for example, a person of color should not be tone policed for getting angry when confronted with a racialized microagression, however accidental it was). You just don’t know what you don’t know. 

The solution here is to regularly check your privilege and ask questions in a private space if you sense you’re being treated unfairly by someone. If you go public with your grievances in hopes of mobilizing the mob, you may accidentally find yourself stepping into the role of the aggressor instead of the victim.

3) Social Media is not built to help you get engagement. It’s built to help itself make money off of you.

Repeat after me: Hits/likes are not a measurable indicator of talent or worth. There are ridiculously talented folks on Tumblr and elsewhere who, for whatever reason, haven’t had their viral moment, and it’s not their fault. Loads of factors come into play where things like likes, reblogs, and comments are concerned, among them being posting frequency, subject matter, the time of day, the day of the week, the week of the month, the month of the year, the current administration, the stock exchange, the concentration of middle class users, who just won the Superbowl, a madman trying to steal an election and undermine the democratic process, a PANDEMIC, do you get where I’m going with this?? lol

At the end of the day, my humble successes have been helped along by good luck, good timing, high profile signal boosters, and an absurd amount of work. (This is why I try to signal boost new work whenever I get a chance over at @vkelleyshares.) 

So while you cannot control Tumblr’s interface, trends at large, or your fellow users, here’s what you can do to ensure you give your work the best possible chance of exposure.

Have an image ready to go with your post. Tumblr is a visual platform (no matter what it says about being good for text). Not good with images? Set up a Canva.com account and get access to free graphic software with a gazillion templates to create whatever attractive image you want to attach to your post.

Keep the outward facing text brief and easy on the eyes. Too long and eyes will glaze over. Put excess text behind a “read more.”

You may think you’re being cute when you do this, but don’t put yourself down in your posts. (Don’t put yourself down in general, of course.) Doing so acts as engagement repellant. If you don’t believe in your work, no one else will.

Related: Be your best cheerleader. Confidence is a magnet, and if you don’t have it, go ahead and fake it until you start to convince yourself you are worth the buzz. So promote yourself! You have gifts that only you can impart. Use that knowledge to fuel everything you do from your art/fiction writing to your outreach with other content creators, and by golly, if someone’s done it already, acknowledge that contribution and then tell the world that this is YOUR unique take on it.

Treat your fellow fandom creators as human beings, not art/fiction/content boosting machines. I cannot count how many times I’ve had folks slide into my DMs with offers of friendship only to disappear once they realize I’m not available to draw a picture for their fic. It hurts because it’s manipulative and it makes me want to hole up and not signal boost anyone. Creators who truly support each other will not give off a transactional vibe. I want to help you reach more people, but not if that’s all I’m good for in your eyes. 

The long and short of it: Lead with compassion, do your best with the opportunities at  your disposal, and remember that fandom belongs to everyone in it. ❤️

What saves a fandom made of sensitive and vulnerable souls from imploding when it goes through growing pains is radical compassion from those who can offer it. Begin with the assumption that your fellow fandomers are not trying to harm you, and wade into the water knowing that your insight into the lives of your peers is limited by default and you may need to temper your words or actions accordingly. If you’re a content creator, save compassion for yourself as well, as there are indeed challenges to gaining an audience, and lack of engagement does not mean you lack talent or skill. Be your best advocate, and if you have the bandwidth to lift up a fellow creator and make a new friend, please, go ahead do it! 

And finally, fandom belongs to everyone, and no one has a monopoly on characters, tropes, or themes. Create and consume what you love (with respect for your more vulnerable peers), and bask in the variety, my friends!

That’s all I’ve got in my head at the moment, although I’m sure there’s more I’m forgetting. Thanks so much to @penpanoply for letting me use her art for this and to everyone else, hang in there and try not to judge each other too harshly. These are unprecedented times, and most of us are doing our best in circumstances that are pushing us to our limits. 

As always, if you have questions or want to sound off on anything, shoot me a message or an ask, or ping me on Discord. It might take me a second to respond (thanks, Covid) but I’ll get to it! Love, love, and more love to all.

[mikeshanlon]

i really enjoy the way young royals explores the theme of legacy and how detrimental it can be to have to live up to a legacy or be obsessed with reputation. (analysis and thoughts under the cut)

i think wilhelm resents the fact that he has to live up to the role of being in the royal family and yet is very afraid of ruining that legacy bc of all the pressure. before he was sent off to hillerska he went to a normal school and wanted normal people around him and was content with erik having to take on the responsibilities of crown prince. and when he does have to assume that role he says he can never be erik, that he’s always had to be compared to him and obviously doesn’t like that. but even before erik passed and he had to take on those duties he was afraid of fucking up the legacy of the crown, when he sees that sign in the hallway that says you are in charge of your own legacy after he holds hands with simon, his anxiety worsens. you can tell it’s been instilled in him for a long time that what is most important is the crown’s reputation rather than his own wants. in the scene where him and simon fight about alexander being caught, he obviously wants simon to stay, but he focuses on how him doing drugs will fuck up his family’s reputation if it gets leaked. as much as he cares for simon, his legacy and his duties are like this oppressive cloud hanging over him. 

i do think that wille cares for his family of course but to me it’s different that the sort of loyal unconditional care with simon and his sister/mom. erik and wille had unconditional love, erik understood how difficult being a prince in the public eye was, and wille obviously cared for him deeply and felt like he could to talk to him about issues. his relationship with the queen is much more strained, she wants a tailored, doctored representation of him in the media, he cannot be anxious and bite his nails, she makes all the decisions for him. family is important to wille partially because it has to be bc of how special his family is. he helps his family, he helps august pay his tuition, and then makes a point of disowning august after his betrayal as his new “brother”. but again, because of the royal status and expectations upon the family, that supersedes and colors all of their relationships with each other. it seems to be more a sense of “duty” than unconditional love. especially after erik’s death, wille always has to consider how the crown’s image will be impacted, even though he never wanted to have this responsibility, or even the responsibility of being the “regular” prince under erik. being a family unit that is under constant public scrutiny is going to strain relationships. the queen knows that the anxiety of fucking up his legacy will get to him, and she uses that to get wilhelm to back out of admitting it was him in the video and coming out. wilhelm has to choose between his own happiness and their reputation, is forced to think that denying it’s him in the video is the only way. he loves simon and wanted to live freely, but that pressure of legacy won out.

i don’t know if i think wille necessarily values the crown over his own personal happiness and relationships, like in the way maybe the queen does--i don’t think it comes from a place of “i’m lucky to be prince and owe my duty to the crown, so i do what i have to do to stay that way” (like how the queen said the crown is a privilege not a punishment), but from fear of destroying the legacy and his family. afterall, he still wanted to pursue a secret relationship with simon, i think if he fully valued the crown and uplifting legacy and fulfilling his duties he wouldn’t have tried that. he wouldn’t have made a point to tell simon he loves him. hopefully we get another season because i think with the iconic ending revolution rendition and him looking in the camera, which also parallels the shot of him being forced to apologize/go to hillerska, he is realizing that focusing on legacy is taking away what’s important to him, and he’s going to shake shit up.

august is definitely the most obsessed with legacy, wanting to carry on his father’s business, being persistent on befriending wilhelm and trying to social climb, wanting power and perfection with being prefect, rowing captain etcetera. he is so obsessed with perfection and reputation he gets addicted to drugs, he fucks with simon and makes him get stuff for parties he can’t afford because good parties will make him look better, he manipulates sara multiple times, he mostly wanted felice because of her nobility, he fucking films wilhelm and simon and OUTS him, his own cousin. he hates that wille has everything he wants but isn’t as interested in preserving and more importantly improving the legacy he’s inheriting. meanwhile august’s familial legacy is dwindling, and he holds on to the last bit of assets and names that he can.... v much sick and a weirdo that shows how harmful being obsessed with legacy is

the queen is of course v focused on legacy and it really breaks my heart and makes me angry that she doesn’t care about wilhelm’s happiness more than their reputation, and moreso doesn’t get august in trouble for literally leaking child p*rn of her kid for the sake of appearances?!?!?! like how is he even remotely trustworthy she is wrong for that! like i said earlier the obsession with legacy puts a strain on their mother/son relationship. she doesn’t even really say anything about wille’s sexuality or his relationship, and barely comforts him, mostly goes in with a plan she’s already concocted without him to fix everything. 

erik seemed to understand and accept his role as crown prince but obviously had issues with it as well, like when he makes the plan for him and wilhelm to run from the press, or when he tells wilhelm to enjoy himself while there aren’t so many eyes on him that care. erik shows someone who has more unconditional love and empathy but still has to focus on legacy and is much more inclined to continue his legacy, but we do see those glimpses over how even the most “ideal” attitude of preserving legacy causes issues.

felice is expected to live up to her mother’s legacy, of being an equestrian, of being the lucia, but she doesn’t want either of those things. her mother wants her to be thinner and straighten her hair, and find someone of nobility to be with. obviously she does find wilhelm attractive lol but i think the main reason she pursued him and definitely why she pursued august was because she was expected to social climb and have royal kids. felice feels the need to portray a false narrative of herself on social media to uphold a certain image of herself. it’s very fucked up that her mom wants those values instilled in her but i love that felice was putting up boundaries and pushing back against her mother and the narrative she’s supposed to live up to. her giving sara the role of lucia and focusing on supporting her friends more in the latter half of the season shows growth and i’m excited to see where her story goes. 

sara is interesting because she seems to want to reject the legacy of her family and being working class and to fit in with the elite of hillerska. sara hates micke, hates that simon contacted him because it’s bringing in this “shameful” and painful part of their past (which i mean is def fair). other than sara’s betrayal in 1.06, i think the scene where she tells her family that she wants to reside at hillerska really exemplifies where she’s at in her relation to legacy/class. after dining at hillerska and living amongst the elite she gets annoyed at eating around the TV, she blames her mother for not leaving micke sooner, she gets angry with simon for caring for her. she wants to lead her own life, be popular and wanted because people want her, not for pity (even though i think simon of course truly cares abt his sister she feels annoyed with his protection and care). felice says early on that she thinks sara doesn’t care what other’s think or having friends, and sara says she still wants friends though. i think sara’s biggest thing is she wants to belong, her and simon moved schools after she was bullied for being autistic so i think that definitely affected her even though she tries to act nonchalant about hillerska at first. we see sara’s longing to fit in in smaller ways at first, like her asking her mom for a better piece of her uniform because hers are “cheap” and already worn out. she gets annoyed at simon for chewing loudly, or her mother sitting casually at the table. as she gets closer to felice and madison and all the other students, the allure of the upper class and their lifestyle draws her in more. so much to the point where she gets very anxious and upset at the idea of her and simon leaving hillerska because he’s having his own crisis and doesn’t consider his pov. so much so that she effectively betrays simon and felice, the people she’s closest to, to make a deal (and make out lol) with august to room there and “be just like him”. personally i think sara’s attraction to august is mostly that allure of the elite and that he seemed to “desire” her when he kissed her because he was being a manipulative dickhead--again that want to fit in and be wanted. and  i think there is a really interesting angle of jealousy and competition in female friendships, even if it is really subtle or not intentionally insidious or anything, sara does slowly start to trying to assume all the roles/fashions/mannerisms of felice to live that life she wants. i do think felice and sara’s care for each other is genuine and one of my fave parts of the show, but i think a lot of people who experienced being a teen girl know how we are always pitted against each other even in our subconscious because of how society treats and values women.

simon seems to be the character that is least interested in upholding legacy and tradition or giving a fuck what anyone thinks (as omar said here lmao) and that makes him a really interesting foil to wilhelm. there could be something said about micke fearing that simon is following in his footsteps, but to me that plot more so reveals how the upper class (august) continually exploit the working class for their benefit, and the trappings of generational oppression. the other thing that can be said is simon signing up for private tutoring and rowing, but again i think that serves to further show that he is forced to “play” by the game of the elites because the school/society is corrupt, and also, that simon has further ambitions outside of where he’s at. he wants to get good grades because he wants to explore new places and avenues. to me simon’s biggest motivations are his passions, the things and people he loves--music, his family, wilhelm. he isn’t loyal to others just because he’s expected to be, or uphold a certain image but because he really cares. he doesn’t watch out for sara because that’s his expected role as her brother to do so, but because he cares. he wasn’t interested in knowing wilhelm because he’s a prince like everyone else, he makes it clear he thinks the royal family are privileged and exploitative, but he is interested because he saw the real wilhelm. he’s out and proud even though his elite classmates are more conservative, he doesn’t care about voicing his unpopular opinions, he has no problem walking away from august’s dickhead behavior or calling him out on his shit. simon doesn’t care if people don’t think of him in the best light. (the only exceptions ig are the drugs conflict and the video, though literally anyone would have a problem with that because it’s much deeper that public opinion and has ramifications and is deeply traumatic--but just adding that before someone is like “well actually!”) i also think it’s interesting that most of the songs simon sings has themes of pushing back against the societal norms, and being remembered in history, plus of course the revolution song motif, and how much those songs affect wilhelm, he seems to connect deeply, like he wishes he could do those things but simon is the one who gets to sing them and actually live them.