#I’m so confused because I SWEAR we’re at the ending of the story but there’s still over 100 chapters left???
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I began walking towards the 'Secretive Plotter'. "…Kim Dokja?" I heard [999] call out to me, but I didn't look back. I undid the [Miniaturisation], and my eye level changed rapidly. The black coat [999] placed on my shoulders wavered along with every step I took. [< Star Stream >'s Probability is now shifting!] [Stream of the great main scenario is now dwelling in you.] Past the canopy of the vine-covered forest, the sea of stars of the < Star Stream > could be seen. On one side of the sky, stars were emitting bright light, while on the other side, ominous-looking galaxies alongside the [Great Hole] were quietly flowing about. Half of it, light, while the other half, darkness. Soon, the final war would begin. And most likely, I would have to stand on one of the sides to witness the end of the world. [Your second Modifier has been decided.] A small star flickered on the far side of the sky. I stared at it for the longest time, before slowly reverting my gaze back to the ground. The 'Outer Gods' were now looking at me. I returned their gazes and finally chose the side I'd stand. [Your second Modifier is the 'Watcher of Light and Darkness'.]
We have a Modifier!!!
Lmfao I jokingly said what it should be a few posts back, and I was both (understandably) way off and actually kind of not? It’s got two opposing parts just like I said! And at this point I’ll take even that as a win since I haven’t known what’s going on for like ten chapters now. I’m just along for the ride.
It's a very Dokja Modifier, just like his first one. Of course when given a choice between A and B, he chooses C. He will watch both sides. He will be both a Demon King and a savior.
And Dokja has officially decided not to follow his own plan. Right after Secretive Plotter got done pointing out that Joonghyuk also hasn’t been following his plan to destroy the Star Stream…
So I assume we're gonna see one final Kim Dokja Scheme. 😁
Though, actually, does it even need to be a scheme considering he seems to be shifting Probability around himself??? Is he the one actively deciding the Main Scenario now????? Not just the “Main Scenario” but the great main scenario, aka what I assume is the goal of the entire rest of the story they’re in?
Ahhhhhhhhhhh! What is happening!
I mean, it makes sense if that’s the case. He has been creating revisions of the novel as he’s gone along, not to mention everything that’s been going on with the whole concept of “he didn’t like the ending that he saw so he decided to change it” with Secretive Plotter coming back onto the frontlines and Dokja knowing how TWSA ended and wanting to give everyone a better one and even the mention of how maybe the author disliked the ending of TWSA and wanted to change it waaaay back in the Peace Land arc iirc and and and…
Also, I just now remembered that Dokja never actually read that final revision.
#orv#orv spoilers#orv novel chapter 422#omniscient reader’s viewpoint#secretive plotter#kdj#I’m so confused because I SWEAR we’re at the ending of the story but there’s still over 100 chapters left???#unless the Final Scenario is really going to be that long???#or we’re gonna go past the Final Scenario…maybe we’ll finally see 1863rd yjh again?#AND STILL I WANT TO KNOW WHAT’S UP WITH JOONGHYUK’S SPONSOR IS IT DOKJA OR NOT
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Princess Treatment
Summary: Whilst on stream, your viewers ask why you don’t have “smoking fingers” and you provide an answer.
Warnings: reader smokes, reader is intended to be female, one sexual innuendo, pre-established relationship, reader gets nails done, no use of y/n
A/N: i watched a clip thing on tiktok of someone pointing out Jake’s fingers and it’s because of smoking so i thought why not have a cutesy girlfriend not ruin her freshly done nails.
also expect some Johnnie to come up i have three requests and they are actually amazing so tysm for them!!
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
You were sat on your pink gaming chair, swaying side to side whilst you were beginning your stream. The viewers rolled in quick, as well as the various donations and quick messages.
A message catches your attention, halting your swaying. “Did you get your nails done?” you mutter to yourself as you lean forwards. “Oh yeah! I did.” You lifted your hands up vertically showing off your fresh nails. “Jake took me for my birthday.” You had a cheesy smile on your face as you brought your hands down. You put them under your thighs as your shoulders hunched up at the mere feeling talking about Jake gave you.
“I was going to get them done anyway,” you paused and thought about your incredibly outgrown nails prior. “if you saw my nails before…Wait! did i show you guys?” you rushed to your phone and went through your gallery.
You found the photo Jake had sent you. It was a picture of you squishing his cheeks together with both hands, and you can see how outgrown your nails were. You flipped your phone to the camera, trying different angles so your viewers could see. “Stop focusing on me,” you muttered angrily to your camera. It focused and showed the chat a cute picture of you and your boyfriend, with your outgrown nails.
“Like we took this when we went target, with Johnnie.” You set your phone down and talked with your hands, even more than usual with your nails. “He literally called me over and went,” you took a breath and made your voice higher in irritation to mock Jake’s, “Babe, show me your nails!” you scrunched your face up, then resorted to your natural voice, “And so i did that, he took a picture.” you paused, showing confusion in your face, “I think he put it on instagram, on his story. I swear he did something like that and.. was there a poll on if he should pay for me to get my nails done?”
Looking at the chat you see the confirmation, or the people who were unaware on how bad your nails looked in shock. You rolled your eyes, “Anyways, i have such a cute boyfriend the came with me and payed.” You showed your nails off again.
This time another message caught your attention, “If you smoke why don’t you have ‘smoker fingers’?” You furrowed your brows at the question. “What the fuck is smoker fingers?” You looked down to your keyboard and began to type ‘what is smoker fingers?’.
“Okay Chat, smoker fingers are~” you dragged out the final word, “Yellowish discoloration on the ends of your fingers from holding a cigarette; wait!” you look at your fingers. “Oh i know why!” you were about to answer when you got a phone call from Jake.
“Hello, i’m streaming.” you held up your speaker to the microphone.
“You wanna know why your fingers aren’t yellow?” Jake yelled in irritation.
“Why?” you giggled with your hand over your mouth.
“Because you always make me hold your cigarettes! Look at my fingers!”
“I can’t, we’re not on facetime,” you were proved wrong as he came through your door behind you. You turned around to see him just stood there with a hand on the door handle and the other on his hip.
You look at the camera, then the stream to see what the viewers were seeing. Then you turned to see Jake still in the same position, causing you to lean into your hands that were propped up on your desk and failed to conceal your laughter. Jake then strutted up to the camera and held up his yellowing fingers with nails littered with chipped polish.
“Look! This is what she does, making me hold her cigarettes!” he then turned away from the camera to look at you cracking up and trying to hide in your hands. “What do you have to say about this?” he then held him fingers up to your face.
“Cigarettes are gross,” you spoke in a small voice with a smile on your face as you peered up at him.
“So you have it inside of your body?” Jake questioned and looked down at you.
“Well, i do that with you. Don’t I?”
He stood there in shock and strutted out towards the door, then he turned around with a cock of his hip.
“Never speak to me again!” he spoke in an accent, then went to another accent. (idk how to describe it it’s kinda like a pageant mum?) “Love you, sweetie.” he opened and closed his hand in a wave and left your room, leaving you laughing your ass to your audience.
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Oh the Guilt
Sam Carpenter x Reader
One-shot
Summary: no
Warning(s): major character death and mourning/grief
Notes: Based off of this request: hey! i saw your requests are open (i am indeed busting). i was wondering if you’d do some angst with either sam or tara? maybe sam/tara spending the holidays alone because they falsely accused reader of being gf and pushed them away/broke up w them. but it only ended up putting r in danger and leading to their death? love me some good ol angst if you’re up for it! have a great holiday season :)
The Christmas lights blur through her tears as Sam clutches your photo to her chest, fingers trembling against the worn edges. Her apartment feels too quiet, too empty, the silence broken only by the distant sound of people celebrating that makes everything worse. It wasn't supposed to be like this.
Sam stares at your sweater draped over her couch - the soft blue one you always wore when it got cold, the one that still holds traces of your perfume. She doesn't deserve its comfort, but she pulls it on anyway, drowning in fabric and guilt and memory.
"We’re specimens to you, aren’t we?" Sam's voice had cracked like breaking glass, fear masquerading as anger. "I’m not letting Tara get hurt again!"
You'd reached for her, confusion and hurt painting your features. "Sam, please. You know me. I would never-"
"I thought I knew Richie too," she'd snarled, backing away from your touch. "Get out. Get out!”
The door had slammed with such finality. She'd thought she was protecting herself, protecting everyone. Instead, she'd handed you to them gift-wrapped - alone, vulnerable, perfect prey.
By the time Sam realized her mistake, she was cradling your broken body in the rain, red seeping into puddles around you both. Your fingers had weakly brushed her cheek, still trying to comfort her even then.
"Not your fault," you'd whispered, but those words haunt her worse than any ghostface ever could.
Now Tara brings food she doesn't eat, Kirby tries to coax her out, but Sam remains suspended in amber, preserved in the moment she lost you. Your clothes hang in her closet like ghosts. She wears your sweaters to sleep, buries her face in the fabric and pretends she can still feel your warmth.
The Christmas tree in the corner - the one you'd insisted on buying together - stands half-decorated, just as you'd left it. Tinsel dangles like broken promises. The star you'd picked out remains in its box, because finishing it without you feels like accepting you're gone.
Sam traces the words of your last text message: "I love you. We'll talk soon." Her phone screen has cracked from how many times she's dropped it, hands shaking too hard to hold on.
She knows she should let others in. Knows you'd want her to live, to heal, to forgive herself. But every time Tara hugs her or Kirby offers support, it feels like betraying your memory. Like she doesn't deserve comfort after what she did to you.
Sometimes, in the depths of night when the walls feel like they're closing in, Sam swears she can feel you. A whisper of movement in her peripheral vision, the ghost of your touch against her shoulder, the way the air shifts as if accommodating your presence.
"I see you everywhere," she whispers into the darkness, clutching your sweater like a lifeline. "The coffee mug you chipped is still in the cabinet. Your stupid action movies are still in my queue. I can't… I can't delete them."
The apartment creaks, settling into winter's grip, and Sam lets out a broken laugh. "Remember how you used to say these old buildings had character? God, you'd make up stories about the noises - ghosts having dance parties, you said." Her voice catches. "Is that what you're doing now? Dancing without me?"
Sam reaches out, fingers trembling in the empty air where she imagines you might be. "I fucked up. I fucked up so bad. I was so scared of losing everyone that I pushed away the one person who…" She chokes on the words. "The one person who never gave me a reason to doubt them."
The Christmas lights flicker, and for a moment, Sam's heart stops. She's learned to find meaning in these small disturbances, these tiny rebellions against reality. "I know what you'd say. That I need to forgive myself. That I need to let people in." Tears track down her cheeks. "But how can I? How can I when every time I close my eyes, I see you bleeding out in my arms?"
Something shifts in the room - maybe the heating kicking in, maybe something more. The tinsel on the half-decorated tree sways gently. Sam watches it, transfixed. "If you're here… I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry. I should have trusted you. Should have protected you. Should have been there when…"
The star for the tree - your star - sits in its box on the coffee table. As Sam watches through tears, a draft from somewhere catches the lid, lifting it slightly. Her breath hitches.
"You want me to finish it, don't you? The tree?" Her laugh is wet, broken. "Always so stubborn about traditions." She reaches for the star with shaking hands. "I don't know if I can. It feels like accepting you're really…"
The room grows impossibly still, as if the very air is holding its breath. Sam could swear she feels the phantom pressure of your hand over hers, guiding her toward the tree. The sensation is so vivid she gasps.
"Okay," she whispers, standing on unsteady legs. "Okay, baby. For you." She clutches the star to her chest, your sweater hanging loose on her frame. "But I'm not ready to let you go. Not yet. Maybe not ever."
As she reaches up to place the star, the Christmas lights seem to glow a little brighter, and for just a moment, Sam swears she can feel your arms around her waist, your chin on her shoulder, just like before. Just like always.
"Stay with me?" she asks the empty room, knowing the answer, dreading the silence. "Even if I don't deserve it?"
The lights flicker once, twice - like a heartbeat, like a promise - and Sam breaks down sobbing, sliding to the floor beneath your half-finished tree, beneath your star, beneath the weight of a love that even death couldn't quite end.
———
A/N: first request filled, ob-la-di (sorry if this sucks, I’m half-asleep)
#ob-la-da#sam carpenter x you#sam carpenter x reader#sam carpenter x gn!reader#sam carpenter x y/n#melissa barrera x you#melissa barrera x reader#melissa barrera#sam carpenter
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could you do some taking care of you on period stories!!
alright so kinda sorta inspired by max and lando's latest stream there wasn't a specific driver request so i chose lando cause the stream was on my mind hope that's okay so yeah anyways enjoy!!!!
(p.s.: he's so adorable in this clip😭)
It had been quite a bit since Lando and Max had streamed from the same room. Finally after weeks of back and forth they stumbled on one date. So, here they both are streaming from Lando's apartment in Monaco, the chat going absolutely feral, seeing them together.
Y/N had been looking forward to a cozy evening while Lando and Max entertained the internet with their usual chaotic stream. She had taken a warm shower, ready to curl up in bed and scroll aimlessly on her phone. But just as she was drying off, she felt the unmistakable cramp and the dreaded realization hit her.
"Oh, for fuck's sake," she muttered, sighing as she reached for her supply of pads.
Now, wrapped in one of Lando’s oversized hoodies, she lay in bed with a heating pad pressed against her stomach. She scrolled through her phone, trying to distract herself from the cramps. She could hear the distant sounds of Lando and Max laughing from the streaming room, their voices slightly muffled by the walls.
Meanwhile, in the other room, Lando and Max were in the middle of a heated debate about who was better at Tarkov.
"Mate, you are so bad at this," Max laughed. "I swear, you run in circles half the time."
"Nah, you're just jealous of my skills," Lando shot back, grinning.
A notification popped up on Lando’s second screen, signaling they had been streaming for a while. “I’m gonna grab a drink. You want anything?” he asked Max, standing up.
Max waved a hand. “Yeah, just get me whatever you’re having.”
Lando nodded, stretching his arms before heading out of the streaming room. As always, before making his way to the kitchen, he took a detour to check on Y/N. It was a habit now—every time he had a moment, he’d sneak in to give her a quick kiss or hug, just because he could.
When he walked in, he immediately noticed her curled up in bed, heating pad pressed against her stomach. His playful smile softened. He knew what that meant.
"Babe, you on your period?" he asked softly, sitting beside her.
Y/N let out a dramatic sigh. "Unfortunately. It’s a nightmare."
Lando leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. "I’ll be right back, okay?", he said exiting the room, leaving the girl confused.
He made his way to the kitchen but instead of grabbing just drinks, he started rummaging through the pantry. He knew Y/N's go-to period snacks: chocolate, some chips, and—oh, he had bought her favorite cookies last week! Score!
When he returned to the streaming room, Max looked up. "Took you long enough—wait, what’s all that?"
Lando placed the drinks on the desk but held onto the snacks. "Y/N’s on her period. We’re ending the stream."
Max blinked before nodding. "Oh. Yeah, fair enough. She needs the comfort package."
Without hesitation, Max turned to their viewers. "Alright, lads, that’s it for tonight. Emergency calls."
The chat flooded with confusion and questions, but they ignored it, quickly shutting everything down. Once everything was offline, Max followed Lando to the bedroom, where Y/N was still curled up.
"Brought you some goodies, love," Lando said, placing the snacks beside her. "And we ended the stream, so now you have our full attention."
Max flopped onto the bed dramatically. "I’m here for moral support."
Y/N laughed softly, shaking her head. "You guys really didn’t have to end your stream."
"Nah, you’re more important," Lando said without hesitation, climbing into bed beside her.
Max smirked. "He’s so whipped."
"Shut up," Lando muttered, wrapping his arms around Y/N. "Let me cuddle my girlfriend in peace."
Max, shaking his head, let out a small chuckle at his best friend. "Alright, alright, I'll leave you two to it. Take care."
Y/N smiled softly. "Thanks, Max. And sorry you had to end your stream because of me."
Max scoffed, waving a hand dismissively. "Nah, I was getting tired of your whiny boyfriend anyway."
Lando gave Max an unimpressed look while Y/N burst into laughter, making Lando pout. "Wow, the betrayal."
Max grinned, backing away towards the door. "Get used to it, mate. See you in the morning—if you survive the clinginess."
With that, he slipped out, leaving Lando and Y/N wrapped up in each other, completely content.
As soon as the door shut, Lando tightened his arms around Y/N, burying his face into her neck. "Finally, alone time."
Y/N giggled, turning slightly to nuzzle against his curls. "You’re so dramatic."
"Shhh," he mumbled. "Let me be clingy."
She smiled, running her fingers through his hair, massaging his scalp lightly. He let out a hum of approval, his whole body relaxing against hers. "You're literally the best boyfriend ever, you know that?"
Lando lifted his head, grinning sleepily. "Say it again."
Y/N rolled her eyes playfully but complied. "Best boyfriend ever."
He kissed her cheek, then her nose, then her forehead. "I love you."
She melted into his embrace. "I love you too. Even when you’re extra."
"Especially when I’m extra," he corrected smugly, pulling the blanket over them. "Now let’s get comfy. Movie? Nap? Or just more cuddles?"
"Mmm, all of the above."
Lando beamed, pulling her even closer. "Perfect."
And just like that, he stayed wrapped around her for the rest of the night, whispering sweet nothings and making sure she was as comfortable as possible. If there was one thing he was sure of, it was that he’d always be there to take care of her—no matter what.
#f1#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#f1 fandom#f1 fic#f1 imagine#fluff#formula 1#lando norris#humor#lando x y/n#lando x you#lando x reader#lando imagine#ln4#mclaren f1#max fewtrell
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𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞’𝐬 𝐧𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞
🪵Pairing —> Logan Howlett x Reader
🪵Genre —> Fluff & comfort
🪵Warning —> None (but spoiler alert : this story takes place after the events of Deadpool & Wolverine)
🪵Inspired by —> @allophonicmess
🪵Summary —> You want to get to know the knew Logan, but he thinks that he isn't good enough for you. So he ends up being cold and distant towards you, towards the girl known as « Wolverine’s epic love ».
🪵Dividers credit —> @moosgraphics
It’s been a few days since Wade, Logan and Y/n came back from the crazy journey they went through. Everyone was still under’s Wade roof, celebrating. Y/n was sat on the couch alone, trapped in her thoughts. It didn’t take long for Colossus to notice it, so he approached Y/n and sat next to her :
« How are you feeling Y/n? You seem lost. »
« I’m doing fine Colossus, thank you for asking. I’m just a bit confused about… some things. »
« Do you wish to talk about it? »
« Well, I cannot stop wondering why would this Logan act this way towards me. I know that he doesn’t know me and doesn’t owe me anything. But seeing the face of your dead lover looking at you like you meant nothing is pretty heartbreaking. I wish I could know why he is so cold towards me, why he doesn’t even notice me. I just don’t understand. »
« Maybe you should talk to him? Honesty and communication are always important. It could bring you closure and peace. »
« I guess you’re right, thank you for listening to me and checking up on me. I think I’m going to take a little nap, I’m still a bit tired of all the things that happened. » said Y/n while chucking at the same time, after that she went upstairs to rest a little.
But on the other side of the apartment, Wade and Logan were discussing or more arguing about the same topic :
« You know I really don’t mean to meddle between lover’s querel and all that stuff. But you’ve been kind of an ass with Y/n especially considering that you know she’s kind of « Wolverine’s epic love » in most of the universes. »
Logan looked at him and just answered :
« Then don’t fucking meddle into it. »
Wade pretended no to hear what Logan just said and continued :
« Well I guess you’re just scared I mean I can understand really. You do look like a grumpy old dad who’s only purpose is to drink his whiskey in front of the TV. While y/n, well, she does look really hot I mean honestly I don’t understand why she’s still single because I swear even I could-
« CAN’T YOU SHUT YOUR GODDAM FUCKING MOUTH FOR ONCE YOU DAMN MOTHERFUCKER. » screamed Logan with rage in his eyes before leaving the room to go outside and get some air.
Hours passed and Logan was still outside, sitting on the front door steps with his bottle of whiskey.
Everyone else was in the kitchen talking and laughing. Y/n just finished her nap and went downstairs to join the others, and while she was about to enter the kitchen Colossus and Wade looked mischievously at each other and said :
« Oh y/n sweat treat, good thing you’re here because well… » said Wade before giving a side eye to Colossus who said :
« We’re missing shrimp chips and we were wondering if you could get some, please? » Y/n laughed and answered « of course I can, it’ll give me some air. »
Y/n took her purse and went outside, right after this Colossus told Peter to rush to the door and lock Y/n outside.
As she went outside Y/n saw Logan down the stairs all alone. She tried to be silent and then turned around to open the door and give the others an excuse to not go out. But as she tried to open the door, she realised it was locked :
« Are they really serious. » she wispered before knocking and screaming
« Are you serious guys? Please open? I forgot something and I really really need to get back out there. » but no one answered.
She turned around and realised that Logan was looking at her
« Hey you, what are you doing here? » she shyly said. Logan turned around to face the street and did not answer. Y/n closed her eyes and let out a sight before telling him :
« Do you hate your Y/n too in your universe? »
Logan looked at her and said
« What? »
she walked toward him to sat on the stairs and continued
« I said do you hate your Y/n too in your universe? Because my Logan, well, he used to hate me so much when we first met, and, well I kind of hated him too. » she said chuckling, and then proceeded :
« We were always arguing, bickering, fighting… but then one day I got hurt really really bad and surprisingly he was there for me. After this moment we started to grow closer until one day we fell in love. So I was wondering if you hated you y/n like my Logan used to? Because that’s the only thing that could explain why you seem so repulsed by me. »
Logan’s expression became soft and he only answered :
« I don’t hate you, god I could never fucking hate you. I cared about my Y/n like your Logan cared about you. »
« Then why are you like this with me? Why do you talk to everyone but ignore my existence like I don’t matter? »
Logan looked down at the floor and answered :
« I know your Logan was some king of hero, but in my universe the things I did, they make me a monster, an animal and I love you way too much to let you be with that kind of man. »
Y/n watched him with her watered eyes and softly said, while putting her arm on his shoulder :
« What is it that you did? No matter what it is you can tell me because all I want is to understand you. »
Logan was hesitant, but if there was one person he could tell anything, if there was one person that could bring him comfort, it was her. So he said :
« Things happened and one day you died, after this I could never be the same. I loved you so much. So I went to the bar everyday, I drank everyday and I let everyone down. Until one day all of the x-men died because of me. I had nothing else to loose anymore. So I killed, everyone, bad people, good people and no matter how much I wanted to stop, I couldn’t. I was filled with so much rage, I let it guide me. »
Y/n was breathless but she knew Logan, and she was sure that no matter what, no matter the universe he was a good man. So she put her hand on his cheek to make him look at her and she said :
« Whatever you did is in the past. Right now you have a chance to be better and to make the world a better place. I know you will. »
she stopped to caress his cheek and then she said
« I could never think of you as a monster Logan nor could I ever be ashamed of you. »
Logan took her hand in his and told her :
« There’s no love in my life if you’re not in my universe Y/n. »
After hearing this, Y/n put her head on Logan’s shoulder and while he wrapped his arm around herself she whispered in his hear
« You’ll always be my one and only true love, no matter what. »
And so they spent hours outside finding comfort in each others arms.
#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#logan x reader#logan howlett#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#x men#fluff#comfort#fanfic
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BOY NEXT DOOR 10 - ( c.s )



part nine
summary- you and your roommates live beside a bunch of senior hockey players, one of them being the infamous team captain chris sturniolo. he’s effortlessly flirty and undeniably attractive, but he’s also a pain in your ass. you find that you have to fight between lust and hatred as you finally get to know the boy next door, whether you want to or not.
warnings- a little angsty, swearing, comfort as well i guess, idk??? nothing crazy
a/n: i liedddd i lied i’m splitting the last part in two bc this became a little longer than anticipated. i hope u are all doing fantastic and i stg i will get the rest of this story out if its the last thing i do LMFAO (next part will give u goblins what you’ve been waiting for hehehehe)
the knocks on your front door start at around six pm the following friday. it’s surprising, because it’s rare that anyone shows up unannounced, especially right before the weekend festivities.
in fact, the last time someone did that was when chris arrived on your front porch with a bouquet of flowers to ask you on a date. you try not to think about it too much as you descend the stairs, focusing on not tripping over your feet instead.
the knocking grows louder, making it clear that whoever is waiting is rather restless.
“i’m fucking coming!” you shout as you make it to the landing, closing the final distance and yanking the door open with a huff.
when you see who it is, you’re even more out of breath. ben and connor stand before you, concern written all over both of their faces. neither of them say anything; they just exchange sheepish glances with one another like they’re unsure where to begin.
“oh—uh…hey guys. what’s up?” you try not to sound too disoriented, even though you are.
“hey…sorry to barge over here like this, i’m sure we’re not really the people you want to be seeing right now.” connor starts, shoving his hands in his pockets as he speaks.
you stay silent, because he’s not really wrong. you know that they have nothing to do with the situation, and you refuse to take it out on them, but seeing chris’s friends is a painful reminder that he still exists.
even though each week becomes a tiny bit more bearable, that doesn’t mean you’re suddenly fine and back to normal.
ben clears his throat, taking over for his friend and cutting to the chase. “look, we really need your help. i swear we wouldn’t be bothering you if it wasn’t serious.”
your eyebrows furrow further, and you’re somehow even more confused than you were when you opened the door. an anxious feeling settles in your stomach, like it’s only going to get worse from here.
“what is it?” you ask hesitantly, because you’re not sure you actually want the answer.
“it’s chris,” connor starts, eyes darting over to their house as he says it, “he’s…i don’t know, he’s just messed up. ever since things ended between the two of you he’s been completely out of it, and now he’s throwing hockey away too.”
you tilt your head to the side. “wait, what do you mean throwing it away?”
”the team confronted him after we lost on sunday and he didn’t want to hear it, so he walked away. we thought he was fronting, that he’d realize he was being an idiot, but he didn’t show up to any of our practices this week and coach is fuckin’ pissed. he won’t talk to us, or listen to anything we’re saying.” ben explains further, waving his hands around in aggravation as he speaks.
horror washes over you when you realize that they probably spoke to him about you, and that the whole team was in on it. you can feel your cheeks heating up in shame just thinking about how that conversation went, which makes you angry.
your voice comes out a lot sharper than intended when you respond. “no offense guys, but i’m not really sure what this has to do with me.”
“kind of, like, everything.” ben shoots back, though he immediately slaps a hand over his mouth once he realizes how he sounds.
connor rolls his eyes and elbows him in the hip, earning a muffled grunt. “what he means to say is that the only person that kid listens to is you. if he doesn’t snap out of it soon and go to the game tomorrow, he's gonna be kicked off the team for good. and as much as you’re on shitty terms, i don’t think you want to see him do that either.”
he’s spot on once again. you’re still hurt, but you can’t bring yourself to truly hate him. hearing that chris is taking this just as hard and is actively fucking up the rest of his career at the most critical time makes your heart feel like it’s suffocating.
you rub your eyes, letting out a long sigh as you begin to mentally prepare yourself for what you’re about to do.
“fine, i hear you, and i’ll talk to him. but i'm not making any promises beyond that.”
they both look so relieved that you actually feel kind of bad. you’re not sure if this is actually going to work, but they’ve clearly been stressing out over their friend for a while now.
you wonder if your own roommates feel the same way about you. they’re out together for happy hour after you insisted on staying home, still not in the mood to socialize. you’ve been trying not to burden them with the massive pressure you‘re feeling all of the time, but they’ve also known you for over three years now.
it’s hard to hide from the people that really know you, which chris clearly understands.
“thank you, seriously. we both owe you major, anything you want for real.” ben praises, hands pressed together as if he’s worshiping.
“yeah, we really appreciate you doing this. i’ve always known you were the best, but you somehow only get better.” connor smiles, a small glimmer of sadness in his eyes.
he straightens up after a moment, nodding over at their place as they begin to retreat. “ben and i are headed out to the bars, so if you’re not up to anything tonight, he’ll be in his room. front door’s open.”
you already feel like you’re floundering, but you nod at the two of them as if you’re just great anyways. what else can you do when you just made a vow to throw your healing out the window?
ben lingers for a moment, staying just close enough so that he can whisper under his breath. “for what it’s worth, you're the best thing that ever happened to chris. and i hope one day he can prove that he knows that too.”
you feel yourself tense up immediately. you have no idea how the hell you’re supposed to respond to that, so you don’t. he gives you a small wave as he finally turns, joining his friend so that they can make their way up the street.
you watch them until they’re gone, still frozen in place. the shock has finally kicked in, and you can’t move.
all you can think about is chris; having to look him in the face again, and listen to him say things to you that you know are going to twist the knife even deeper. it’ll probably undo all of what little progress you’ve made.
but you can’t let him mess everything else up too, not when you still love him so much. there are some things that are worth throwing yourself on the blade for, and this is one of them.
unfortunately or not, you’re going over there, and you’re going to shake some fucking sense into him like you always do.
even if it kills you in the process.
when chris hears the soft tapping on his door, he assumes it’s one of his roommates trying to persuade him off of his war path once again. he’s sprawled out in bed as if there’s not a care in the world, playing endless rounds of fortnite like he has been for the past week.
“i’m not interested in chatting.” he snaps, narrowing his irritated eyes at the tv screen in front of him.
it’s locked anyways, so they can’t get in regardless. and yet, despite this fact, the door swings open a moment later. chris is about to spiral into a complete rage until he actually looks over to see who it is.
you’re standing there with a bent paperclip in hand, a self-satisfied expression plastered on your face.
“so it actually does work, huh?”
for a second he thinks he’s hallucinating. there’s no way that you’re actually here, in his room, cracking a joke about the time that he broke in to talk to you. but he can smell your signature perfume in the air, which convinces him that this is in fact real life.
chris shoots up in bed, messing with his hair self-consciously. a furious blush is creeping up his face, because his room is a fucking disaster zone of clutter and it’s embarrassing. he wasn’t expecting anyone, especially not you.
“um—hi?” it’s more of a question than an actual greeting, even though he didn’t mean for it to come out that way.
“hi.” you reply awkwardly, eyes shifting around his room as you continue to stand in the doorway.
“you can, uh, sit. if you want.” chris stutters, moving his legs so that they’re hanging off his bed.
he straightens his comforter to make room for you, still red with shame about the mess. he has no idea why you’re here, he’s just praying that he doesn’t say anything that’ll scare you away. he wants this moment to last as long as it possibly can.
luckily enough, you actually do end up making your way over, settling on the very edge of his bed. you’re practically falling off it, trying to make sure that you keep as much distance between the two of you as possible. it breaks his heart, but he can’t say he doesn’t understand.
“i’m sure you’re confused, so i’ll just get right to it.” you start, picking at your fingernails so you don’t have to look at him.
the lump in his throat is growing by the second, but instead of showing that, he nods and attempts to choke it back down.
“your friends came over. they’re really worried about you, you know.” you continue carefully.
he barely contains an eye roll, opting to close them for a moment instead as he lets out a small breath. but he understands, seeing as he’s gone completely off the rails.
“i don’t know what to say to that.” chris replies honestly, since he’s apparently lost the ability to talk to you too.
“well, i guess you could start by telling me what the hell is going on, because you pretty much live and breathe for your team.” you’re putting it bluntly now, because you know it won’t get through to him if you don’t.
he rubs a hand over his face, trying to think of the right words. they’re not really there, but it’s been too long of a pause, and he needs to fucking speak like a normal person.
“i…my heart just isn’t in it. i’m playing like shit and it’s better if i don’t bring them down with me.”
you shake your head, completely astounded by the attitude that you’re hearing. “so you’re just going to turn your back now? when you’re weeks away from selection show and so close to a contract?”
he’s defeated; chris doesn’t know what else to do besides throw in the towel, and he also has no idea how to get you to understand that. his shoulders slump slightly as he stares at the floor.
“yeah, i guess i am.”
it’s silent for a moment, which makes him incredibly insecure. then you nudge him with your foot a little, forcing him to look over at you.
“listen, if you don’t want to play hockey anymore, that’s your decision at the end of the day. but i have to be honest with you before you do that.” you start off strong, facing him fully so that you can meet his eyes.
“the first time i ever came to your game, as someone that you actually invited, i saw you. i’d been to games before, but that night i was solely focused on you, as stupid and fucking embarrassing as that is to admit. you were electric out there, chris, and you’ve got so much talent it’s actually a bit ridiculous. i mean, you literally made me fall in love with hockey all over again,” your voice wobbles slightly—barely enough for him to notice—but it’s there.
your eyes are full of an emotion he can’t comprehend. maybe it’s because you’re feeling every single one of them, just like he is right now. he’s beginning to cry, and there’s nothing he can do to stop it.
“you’ve been putting in the work, and i know that you’d get an AHL contract from one team or another. you want it so bad it kills you, and you’re so damn close. i can’t let you give that away because of us.”
the words hit him hard, and even though his first instinct is to get defensive, there’s no point. you can read him like a book, and you know just as well as he does that his terrible performance has everything to do with your relationship.
slowly, he reaches for your hand. he can’t help it; being this close to you makes it feel like every single one of his nerves is on fire, and he has to actually feel you.
your fingers tangle together, resting on your leg. you’re stiff at first, but you relax into it as his thumb grazes your lower thigh in a calming pattern. it feels so natural, almost domestic, even after being apart for so long.
his other hand goes to your neck, pulling you forward so that your foreheads press together gently. you can smell him, feel his slightly callused palms, hear his soft breaths. it’s so overwhelming that the tears you’ve been shoving away spring to your eyes.
he knows he only gets one chance to say it, so he does.
“i love you. i love you so much that i can't focus on anything else, not with the way things are between us. and i am so, so sorry that i ever did that to you, or that i put myself in that situation in the first place. it was my own insecurity taking over, as much as that sucks to say, and it was pathetic. but i want to be with you, only you, and i always have. i mean, fuck, i’ve loved you since the moment you moved in next door, when you yelled at me out your window to put on a shirt that night.” chris chuckles slightly, sniffling a bit as he continues to brush his thumbs along your skin.
you can’t help but huff out a small laugh as well, thinking about that day. you were already frustrated after it took hours to build your dresser, and him teasing you was just the final nail in the coffin.
“the point is that i love you, and i’m sorry. i just needed you to hear me say it.” he breathes.
everything in him wants to lean in and close the rest of the space, because he misses his mouth on yours so much. teardrops roll down your cheeks slowly, and he can feel you shaking just a little bit in his grasp.
“i fucking love you too, chris, but i just…i just don’t know.” you sigh, biting down on your bottom lip hard to keep them from colliding with his.
you place a hand on his chest, pushing him away just a little bit to try and set a boundary. it’s almost worse, because now you can really see him, his face inches apart from yours.
his eyes dart down to your lips for too long, puffy from you gnawing on them, and he can feel himself slipping into that same trance he’s always in whenever he’s around you. especially after hearing those three words, whether you were cursing at him or not.
but he nods and lets his fingers fall from your neck, because he refuses to force this on you if you’re not ready. he still keeps a hold of your hand, though, for at least a little longer.
“i get it. i’ll fucking wait, i don’t care. if there’s any chance, i’d wait forever, do you understand that?”
you can’t meet his eyes as you push some of your hair over your shoulder. “i’m not sure that i do.”
“i can’t do this without you, and i don’t want to.” chris feels like he’s repeating himself, but he doesn’t care.
he squeezes your hand just a bit, and you use your free one to brush the tears from your cheeks. you finally meet his gaze again a moment later, eyes shining slightly. he can see the hesitation in them from a mile away.
“please, just come to the game tomorrow. i’ll swallow my pride and beg for forgiveness until coach lets me back on the team if you can do that for me.” he pleads, the faintest of ideas forming in the back of his mind.
you blow out another breath, but your body betrays you and you’re nodding your head before you can actually respond. he’s surprised by this, naturally.
but you knew the second the words came out of his mouth that you would say yes, so you verbalize that fact. “i’ll go. if you show up and play like you mean it, i’ll go.”
he feels himself laugh again instinctively, just because of how wrong he was. you’ll always have that fiery personality; it’s just you. he figured you’d eventually move on and find some really great guy, but he was pretty sure that he would always stay right here, dreaming of you.
“i’ll play like it’s the last game of my life, i promise.” he places his hand over his heart, knowing full well now that he’s going to put on a real show.
you pull your own from his so that you can stick your pinky out, forcing him to swear on it. you’re well aware that it’s silly, but you’ve always believed it was a little deeper than just saying it.
“pinky?” you challenge.
he smiles, linking his finger with yours without batting an eye. “pinky.”
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#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo x reader#christopher sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo fanfic#christopher sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo angst#chris sturniolo fluff#chris sturniolo x you#sturniolo fanfic#fanfic
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Lucifer x shy Baker reader
very first lucifer story and i can’t tell if i like it or hate it lol but i hope u guys enjoy it!! :)
☾. °. ࿐ ` , •
sugar. butter. flour.
that’s how most of your days went — baking pastries in one of hell’s finest bakeries, serving regular, everyday sinners, to the fanciest overlords of hell. it was tiring work, starting everything from scratch each and every morning and making sure every bite would be the freshest it could be.
you, yourself, weren’t an overlord — just a normal city goer on the streets of pentagram city, doing your job to make a living. even in hell you’re expected to pay rent; but i guess that’s why it’s called hell.
the door chimes, signalling a customer entering your quiet little bakery that smelled of strawberries and sweetness.
“hello, darling” and there he was — lucifer morningstar, the king of hell, himself. you look up from where you were putting the last of your pies in the display case, your cheeks becoming as red as the strawberries you cut up earlier. “oh, your majesty! hello!” you make your way to the front counter, hoping he doesn’t realize how flustered he makes you merely by his own presence.
oh, he absolutely notices. and it feeds his ego tenfold.
he rests his elbow on the counter, resting his chin on the back of his hand.
“i believe i ordered a dozen of your finest cupcakes. shaped like ducks, to be more precise” you chuckle to yourself — who knew the king of hell would get so much enjoyment out of rubber ducks? “let me go get those for you, your majesty”
“oh, dear, there’s no need for formalities. lucifer’s just fine. especially since i’m in here oh-so often” he looks at you with half lidded eyes, raising his eyebrows at you. he knows exactly what he’s doing to you when he speaks in that tone.
you try not to stumble over your own two feet as you get the fancy pink box that has a clear lid, perfectly displaying his highness’s order. you can feel yourself trying not to shake with nerves because satan, he’s so beautiful. “i’m beginning to think you come in here for more than just the sweets i bake” you place the box with fragile goods down in front of him on the counter. lucifer chuckles at your statement, drawing small circles with his pointer finger on your counter. “oh, really? and what makes you say that, hm?”
“i-i don’t know… maybe it’s just an observation, but you come here more than the regulars. and when you do, you usually strike up a conversation with me for hours on end until i have to tell you we’re closed” you chuckle shyly, recalling the countless times lucifer has come in just to talk to you, or give you so many compliments that turn you into a blushing mess.
you don’t understand why he has specific interest in you; he barely knows you, and you him. only in the fairytales in your mind are happily holding hands together.
“oh! haha! that!” he looks nervous, fiddling with his jacket lapels and wiping none existent dirt off his sleeves, not realizing how many times he’s come in just to see you. but he can’t help it, he’s craving the sweetness you give off of lavender and daydreams that it spins him poetic; and he hopes that maybe one day you’ll let him have a taste (you will). “i suppose you just have a way of… drawing me in, i-i guess”
“i just work here, lucifer… you don’t even know me”
“well then, perhaps we should change that then, don’t you think?” you furrow your eyebrows in confusion, tilting your head like a small puppy. lucifer’s heart nearly beats out of his chest. “what do you mean?”
“i meaaan… come by! a-and share some cupcakes with me! and we can also have tea! or chocolate milk! we don’t even have to have the cupcakes! i can get something made for us! michelin-tasting menu, free à la carte!”
you giggle at his excitement and lucifer swears he could listen to that sound for the rest of eternity.
“i-i get off work at five?” you ask with a shy smile, pink dusting your cheeks at the thought of a date with the man you’ve been crushing on for so long. “then i shall see you then, my dear” he kisses the back of your hand with a gentleness that leaves your head spinning as he picks up the box of duck-shaped cupcakes and walks out of your bakery.
please reblog/comment if you enjoyed my work, it’s greatly appreciated ♡
#❥ lexi’s daydreams#lucifer morningstar#lucifer morningstar x you#lucifer morningstar fanfiction#lucifer morningstar x reader#lucifer morningstar imagine#hazbin hotel#lucifer hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x you#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel fluff#hazbin hotel imagine#hazbin hotel fanfiction
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TERRIBLE TWOS
dad!nick x male!reader

summary: in which you and your husband, Nick, try to handle your daughter, Aliyah’s, tired behavior.
genre: fluff �� pov: second person ✩ word count: 1.4k
warnings: none?
a/n: uhh i know i said i wasn’t writing another fic, but i’m a liar so, jokes on you actually. i came up with this in the shower and just couldn’t pass it up. it was meant to be a little blurb, but gang wanted more so. the ending is awkward sorry, i still don’t quite know what i’m doing. anyways, happy reading! ❤️🔥
Life as new parents isn’t always the easiest, but you two have handled things fairly well. The past two years with your daughter, Aliyah, have been amazing.
Nick is able to work on his business remotely, so he mostly stayed home with her, while you went in to work everyday. He was an outstanding father, and Aliyah absolutely adored him, they were so close. She loved you just as much of course, and on the weekends she loved having you both home to cuddle and play with.
She had grown used to your daily routine, however, today was going to be different, because Nick had meetings lined up that he had to be in the office for, so you took off in order to stay home with her. It wasn’t the first time you had been alone with your daughter obviously, but it had been a while. Still, you were eager to spend some one on one time with your sweet girl.
You had heard horror stories of people complaining about their toddlers' behavior, but you always chalked it up to them either over exaggerating or just being bad parents. That was until today, when your own toddler decided she wanted to switch things up.
—
“BABE WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN??” you shout as your husband, Nick, walks in the door, his hands full of bags you assumed to be groceries.
“I know, I’m sorry our last meeting ran way over, and I knew we needed some things for dinner so I decided to stop by the store on the way home.” He explains as he walks into the kitchen, placing the bags onto the island.
“We might not even make it to dinner!” you shout, and Nick looks over at you confused, his eyes narrowing.
“Babe, what are you talking about?” he chuckles, as he puts the food away, clearly not understanding the severity of the situation.
“Aliyah, your daughter, didn’t go down for her nap today.” you say to him, crossing your arms over your chest.
“Why is she only my daughter when she doesn’t take a nap?” he responds, mimicking your gesture.
“That’s because she acts just like you when she doesn’t. She’s extremely cranky. She wouldn’t stop crying. She’s been throwing fits every 15 minutes. SHE ACTUALLY THREW AT BLOCK AT ME!” you yell recounting the event.
Nick bites back a laugh before the realization hits him, “Ohh no,” he whispers.
“Exactly! I swear, this is the worst it’s ever been,” you sigh, placing your head in your hands.
“No!” Nick utters, pulling your hands away from your face.
“Listen, we are not going to be defeated by a 2 year old, okay? This is our house, and we’re in charge.” he says hastily as you nod along to his rant.
“Yeah, we’re the adults here!” you agree.
“Say it!” he demands.
“This is our house, and we’re in charge!” you shout.
“RIGHT! So where is she?” he asks, walking out of the kitchen into the hallway.
“She’s sitting in her playroom room, I turned on Gracie’s Corner. This is the longest that she’s been content all day. I don’t see how you do this, I almost started crying with her.” you say before following behind your husband, and he chuckles at your statement before turning to face you.
“You’re doing great, it gets better, I promise,” he praises as he holds your face in his hands, kissing your forehead sweetly, and you smile up at him.
“Well, did you at least put the Gracie video on loop?” he asks, turning away to walk down the hall towards the playroom, with you not far behind.
“Loop? What loop? What are you talking about?” you ask confusedly, and Nick stops in his tracks, causing you to run into him.
He turns around sharply to face you, his eyes widening. “You didn’t loop it? Babe, you have to loop it because once it goes off she-“
“DADDYYYYYY!” you hear your daughter’s cries from down the hall, and sigh deeply. As you and your husband rush to her, you were stopped in your tracks by her meeting you halfway, her ocean blue eyes welling with tears.
You both kneel down to her level, and Nick wipes away her tears with his thumb, his demeanor softening the second he sees his little girl.
“What’s wrong, bunny?” he asks softly.
“Daddy, Gwacie went off, I wanna watch Gwacie! I wanna watch Gwacie! I wanna watch Gwacie!” she chants, stomping her tiny feet. You and Nick just sit there, watching your daughter absolutely lose it.
“Liyah Jade, c’mon now. Gracie isn’t going anywhere, we can always restart it, you’re fine. Just calm down, honey,” he reassures her.
“Okay, can I have a cookie pwease daddy?” she says pouting.
“Sure, let's go get you a cookie,” he smiles at her sweetly.
“Nicolas!” you utter in disbelief.
“Why don’t you go pick out the cookie you want okay? I’ll be there in a second,” he says to his baby girl as she skips away down the hall. He turns to look at you, shrugging.
“Cookies before dinner, really?” you say, your eyes narrowing at him.
“I know, but she was pouting, and c’mon she’s so cute!” he says defeated.
“What happened to ‘this is our house and we’re in charge’?” you say chuckling, and he pauses.
“Doesn’t really sound like something I would say,” he smirks as he walks into the kitchen with Aliyah, shaking your head at the way she had him wrapped around her little finger.
—
Once back in the playroom, after having cookies and watching Gracie together as a family for what felt like the hundredth time, you noticed that it was getting close to dinner time. You leave the two to continue watching more videos while you go and cook. You decide to prepare something quick and easy. After spending all afternoon with a grumpy toddler, you couldn’t be bothered to make anything more elaborate.
As you were finishing whipping up dinner, you could hear Nick and Aliyah in the other room bickering, and you couldn’t help listening. His ability to straight up argue with a toddler never ceased to amuse you.
“But honey, when you make a mess you have to clean it up. Look, we can even make it fun. I can turn on some music and-”
“No, daddy! I can’t want to!”
You couldn’t see him, but you just knew your husband was rolling his eyes.
Once dinner is ready, you call for them to come and eat. To your surprise dinner goes smoothly. Usually, Aliyah complains about eating her vegetables, saying ‘I can’t want that! It’s gwoss’, but tonight she ate them willingly. Maybe her missing a nap wasn't so bad after all, you thought to yourself.
You glance over and see your daughter yawn for the third time, and you and Nick give each other a knowing look. The ‘no naps’ campaign she had been running was finally taking a toll on her.
—
After dinner, you started getting ready for bed. You gave Aliyah a bath, brushed her teeth, and got her ready for bed. Nick came in soon after to read her favorite story. She cuddled up next to him, her eyelids growing heavier by the second. You watched from the door frame as the story ended, and your toddler now sound asleep in your husband's arms.
“Soo, have we defeated Bowser yet, or no?” you say teasingly.
“Shh! Don’t call her that!” Nick says as he throws a plushie from her bed at you.
You jump out of the way so that it misses you, “I’m kidding! She is cute though, especially when she’s sleeping,” you say looking down at her tiny frame, smiling.
“Amen to that, a lot quieter too.” You both chuckle and Nick gets up out of her bed, careful not to wake the little sleeping beauty, before tucking her in, and you each kiss her goodnight.
You tip top quietly out of her room, closing the door gently, and you both let out a sigh of relief. You head towards your bedroom which is only a couple doors down, and start getting ready for bed yourselves, the two of you feeling pretty worn out.
After showering and slipping on pajamas, you both plop down into your bed on your respective sides, settling under the covers.
“Today went completely different from what I expected,” you confess as you cuddle into your husband's side. He laughs as he wraps his arm around you, rubbing your back softly.
“I probably should’ve given you a heads up about that. She is a menace when she’s tired,” he sighs deeply.
“Yep, sounds familiar,” you tease and he pinches your side.
“Heyyy! I’m not that bad, and I will just go to sleep if I’m tired, not start a whole ass riot,” he says in defense and you both laugh.
After a while, a comfortable silence grows between you and before long you both drift off to sleep.
—
✎ signed,
𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓃𝒾𝒸𝓀 𝑔𝒾𝓇𝓁 ✩
🏷️: @muwapsturniolo @mattslolita @guccifrog @luverboychris @freshloveforthefit @matty-bear @mybelovednick @imsosillygoofylol @ghostking4m @certifiednatelover @meg-sturniolo @sturniolossss @moonk1ss3d @nickgetsmewetter
#sturniolo triplets#sturniolos#sturniolo#nick sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#nick sturniolo x male reader#nick sturniolo x reader#mr stromboli#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#a fics#stromboli fics#n fic
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Love's Second Chance: A Holiday Reunion - Chapter 4
Summary: With the help of Rosita, Y/N tries to prepare for her date with Negan. A few complications arise and some hurtful memories from the past come back to haunt her with both Joel and Negan.
Characters: Joel Miller, the reader (OC), Negan Smith, Rosita, etc.
AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60501985/chapters/154945717
Warnings: 18+, Swearing, Smut, Public Play, Loads of Angst, Dirty Talking, Heavy Touching, etc.
Notes: My first chapter with both the boys in it! I hope you enjoy. Thanks to those that do read the story!
“Honey, you can’t be serious when you say that you had sex with Joel again, right?” Rosita blurt out from where she was in the sitting area of Y/N’s bedroom. Sitting on the couch with Coco in her arms, Rosita was waiting on Y/N who had disappeared into her walk-in closet in attempts to find something to wear tonight for her dinner with Negan. They had been talking about what happened the other night with Joel. What they did, the things he said to her afterwards. And considering Rosita had been part of her life since college? Rosita pretty much knew most things about their relationship. Y/N was trying to be vague about the sex part since Coco was still a baby. So when Rosita ended up being so blunt, she was surprised by it and backstepped to stare out at her best friend. Both confusion and amusement flooded her features while Rosita played with Coco. Noticing the way that Y/N was staring out at her had Rosita shrugging dramatically. It was clear that Y/N didn’t want to be talking about sex in front of the baby, but Rosita really didn’t care. “She’s not even one yet. We’re fine.”
Even so, it didn’t seem like the smartest idea for them to openly talk about sex in front of Rosita’s toddler. Heading back into the closet, Y/N heard Rosita huffing all the way from inside of it, “How does that man continue to get you to have sex with him whenever he wants it?”
“He knows I love him?” Y/N countered being loud enough for Rosita to hear. It had been two days since it happened. That night, she watched a movie with Joel and the children. Multiple times during the night Joel had tried to open the door for more, but she denied him every time. After the movie, she was originally going to grab some pillows and a blanket for Joel to sleep on the couch, but Peter suggested Joel sleep in his bedroom with him instead. It was sweet that their thirteen-year-old still love Joel so much. During the night she had gone to check in on them to see that Peter was laid out across Joel sleeping which made her swoon. That was the hardest part about things with Joel. The children loved him, and they loved him a lot. That was something she actually liked because she was proud that Joel remained present in their lives. Having her children love him that much was a good thing, but that part of Joel consistently made her fall in love with him over and over again. Loving Joel Miller was hard because there were parts of him that were so good and there were parts of him that broke her heart. It always confused the feelings she had for Joel. Truthfully? She just knew that the most appealing thing about Joel for her was that he was a good father. “We were married thirteen years. He knows how to get me.”
Considering everything with her relationship with Joel, Y/N moved to the door again to lock eyes with Rosita, “Plus, Rosita I’m not lying to you when I tell you that Joel is good at sex.”
“But how do you know that?” Rosita doubted that statement, her dark eyes growing big. Somehow she refused to believe that Y/N understood what good sex was. “Joel is the only man you’ve ever had sex with. He could be terrible at sex and you would never know because you’ve never slept with anyone else.”
Coco was staring out at Y/N with her big brown eyes and it was hard to really gather words because she didn’t want to go completely dirty in front of Rosita’s daughter, “Because he makes me feel…really…really…good during those moments. Multiple times.”
“You can say that he makes you come a lot. She’s not going to understand what you are saying when you are talking about orgasming,” Rosita promised, bouncing Coco on her leg. Hearing Coco laugh out made Y/N smile, but even with Rosita promising it was okay, she didn’t feel comfortable going into extensive details. Back when Peter and Elizabeth were younger, she was always super careful with them as well. “She’s a baby, you don’t have to be so nervous saying things in front of her.”
“I’m just trying to be respectful. You’d be surprised how quickly the children picked up on swear words when one of us would accidentally say them,” Y/N recalled what things were like when her children were younger. “What I was trying to suggest was if Joel was bad at sex, I wouldn’t feel as much pleasure as I do when we’re together during those moments.”
“Well fine then. Joel is good at sex. I get it, but you need to toughen the fuck up,” Rosita scowled eliciting a tiny laugh from Y/N. It made her face go hot before she stepped back into her closet to start going through her clothes again. She didn’t know where to start with what she should wear tonight. It felt like she was drowning in her things. It had been a while since she tried to dress up to impress someone. “I’m surprised he only got you to have sex with him that one time. Usually he can convince you into a few more. At least you stood up for yourself this time. I don’t know what the fuck he was thinking. Who tells a woman that is still in love with you that if you had sex that way during your marriage the two of you might still be married instead of divorced? That’s such a dick move.”
“Well, he was never really good with his words,” Y/N acknowledged, coming out of the closet holding up a bright red dress in front of her that had Rosita wrinkling her nose. Realizing that Rosita didn’t like it, Y/N headed back into the closet to search for something else. That was honestly always the case about Joel though. Even when he was the popular jock in the past, he was very shy and quiet. Talking was never one of his talents. She was just charmed by his cute southern drawl and his big brown eyes. “I was so drawn to him from the moment he moved to town when we were little kids.”
“How did he even get you to date him?” Rosita wondered with Y/N moving into the doorway to show her another dress which had Rosita shaking her head again. A loud sigh fell from her lips when Y/N headed back into the closet.
“We were always friends, but he really never showed interest in me like that for a long time,” Y/N thought back on her relationship with Joel. “I was at this party with another friend. I was sitting alone, Joel came over and told me how beautiful I looked that night. And then he kissed me. I was pretty much hooked after.”
“Which means you slept with him that night,” Rosita scoffed from where she was sitting thinking about the Joel that Rosita knew about now. Again, Y/N came out with a dress and Rosita shook her head. Standing up, Rosita grabbed the dress with her free hand, handed Coco off to Y/N who scrambled to keep the baby in her arms, but then managed as Rosita walked into her closet. “Losing your virginity at a party sounds real romantic.”
“It wasn’t at the party. I mean we made out a little bit there. He offered to walk me home, but instead we ended up at his house. We snuck into his bedroom through the window and we had sex. Yeah, it wasn’t perfect, but it wasn’t that bad for a first time. Joel definitely got better through the years. But you have to understand he’s…” Y/N looked to Coco that was in her arms, staring up at her as she spoke. “Joel isn’t…small. So it was going to be uncomfortable regardless since it was my first time.”
“Did he know it was your first time?” Rosita pushed through the clothes, stopping to look back at Y/N. Giving a nod, Rosita sighed and shook her head. “I see.”
“You have to understand, Joel was the boy I had been in love with most of my life. When he moved to town, I was immediately smitten with him. The crush was big. So when he finally started to see me in that way? I fell fast,” she explained what it was like for her when she was a teenager getting Joel’s attention. “And then when I did have his attention, all the girls were jealous. Joel was the most popular boy in school. And he wanted me. We were inseparable after that moment.”
“Ah yes. The most popular boy in school effect,” Rosita scoffed under her breath while she pushed through Y/N’s clothes in attempts to find something for her to wear. “So you two lost your virginities to each other, or?”
“I don’t think I was Joel’s first,” Y/N admitted remembering that Joel already had everything in his bedroom that night. Having the baby’s eyes on her made her uncomfortable talking about her sex life. “I feel like there was someone else before me. He doesn’t talk about it much.”
“Probably more than one,” Rosita suggested, taking a break from looking through the clothes. “I do have a question though. Did Joel know that you had a crush on him?”
“I never hid it,” she was honest with her friend having Rosita tip her head to the side while folding her arms out in front of her chest. “Why?”
“What took him so long to feel the same way then? If you always had a crush on him, why did he wait until he was seventeen to make a move? Shouldn’t he have done it immediately? I mean boys start thinking about sex at a very young age,” Rosita stressed what she knew to be true about men. “You think he would have made it clear how he felt about you sooner.”
“We were just friends,” Y/N shrugged, not really sure of an answer to give since there was no good one. Joel never really explained to her what had him changing his mind about her. Maybe she should have asked. “I think around that time I started probably dressing better. I was sportier when I was younger. Then I started to grow into my boobs and started wearing things to bring attention to them.”
“Which brings me to my next thought…” Rosita rubbed her hands together, moving across the closet to grab a black dress. Pulling it out, Rosita held it out in front of her and offered up a big cheesy smile. “Oh honey! This is it!”
Taking a look at the dress had Y/N nervous when she realized how much of her would be revealed in it, “You’re going out on a date with a professional baseball player. You’re going to look smoking hot in this. You want to make a good impression. He’s famous for fuck’s sake. You just said your breasts were a good asset to focus on.”
“I’m not trying to say to him that I want him to have sex with me,” Y/N snickered realizing that they were having an abrupt change of conversation going from Joel to Negan. “Negan was my best friend before you showed up in my life. Where everyone else sees Negan Smith the baseball star, I see Negan Smith, the boy that used to sneak in through my window every night so we were always together.”
Dramatically, Rosita’s head bobbed about, “And you never had sex with him?”
“Well,” Y/N paused, her lips parting at the answer to that question. “You know I’ve only slept with Joel.”
“But there was a long pause there. What was that long pause?” Rosita was curious now, folding the dress over her arm now that she felt like she was getting to some of the good stuff. “That was way too long of a pause.”
“We never had sex,” Y/N was quick to correct Rosita thinking they had slept together. “We were really good friends that…well, we were close.”
“Vague,” Rosita frowned, disappointed that Y/N wasn’t elaborating on her relationship with Negan. “So, you’re telling me that you don’t find this guy sexy?”
“Now, I didn’t say that. He’s very good looking,” Y/N responded, a warmth flooding into her face at the idea of Negan. After she saw him again? She realized he was even sexier now than he was when they were younger. Rosita smirked, nodding her head to the dress again. “I don’t want to give him the wrong idea.”
“It’s not giving him the wrong idea by dressing in something hot,” Rosita fought back, putting emphasis on her words. “Either you impress him by showing off your gorgeous natural curves or what? What’s the worst that can happen here?”
There was nothing she could say. Maybe Rosita was right. She should wear something that made her feel confident and beautiful. And that dress would make her look good. Nodding her head, she finally agreed to wearing the dress and Rosita got excited.
“So, Joel never had a problem with the two of you being close?” Rosita brought back up their conversation, including Joel this time.
“After I got with Joel is when our friendship kind of went to shit,” Y/N admitted feeling an ache at the center of her chest. “Looking back on things? I probably spent way too much time with Joel. And that was my fault. Instead of being around him, I was spending every moment with Joel. The three of us were super close. I don’t know where things went wrong.”
“So, he was super important to you?” Rosita questioned with Y/N shifting the weight of Coco in her arms. “You don’t even have to answer that. I can see it in the way you talk about the guy. How you’re nervous. You want to look good for this guy. You want this to be special. So, put this on.”
Listening to her friend, Y/N nodded and was careful in handing Coco back to Rosita. Giving her some space, Rosita left the closet with Coco. Putting on the dress made her realize that this was a bold move. Putting something on like this that was sexy. It did bring attention to her body, but it had been a long time since she got to dress up and put emphasis on herself.
When she came out after putting on the dress, Rosita let out a whistle at the way she looked. It was form fitting to her body and it did bring a lot of attention to her breasts. Just like they predicted.
“That’s the winner,” Rosita promised her looking to the time. Stepping forward she pressed a kiss against Y/N’s cheek and nodded toward the door. “I have to get going, but make sure you send me a photo of what you look like before you go! You look fantastic already. I think this Negan guy will get a hard on just looking at you.”
“Oh stop,” Y/N laughed, rolling her eyes at the thought. “We’re just meeting up as friends from the past. That’s all.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Rosita waved her hand about and shook her head. “You have a good time.”
After Rosita left, Y/N took a long time looking at herself in the mirror. Was this too much? Would it give the wrong idea to Negan? He told her that he would be picking her up tonight and didn’t really request her to dress a certain way. Maybe she was trying too hard and he would think the same. It was getting too close to the time he said he would pick her up, so she would just have to stick with it at this point. She finished her hair and make-up. Put on some of her nicer jewelry and perfume before heading downstairs.
All she had to do was grab her bag and her coat. Then she would be ready to go. Being early was a good thing. It meant she had less things to worry about.
Getting about halfway down the stairs, she heard the sound of something falling over in her kitchen. It made her movement come to a halt. Grasping tightly to the railing, she listened carefully. Shuffling continued making her realize that she wasn’t alone. Someone was in her home. And it couldn’t have been Rosita. She saw and heard her leave.
Being quiet in the way she moved, Y/N got down the stairs. Shadows were moving around from her kitchen. She wasn’t imagining things. In the distance she saw Elizabeth’s softball bat resting at the corner of the room. Heading that way, she grabbed a tight hold of it and moved for the kitchen. Panic was flooding her veins. Why the hell would someone break into her home of all places? The children were with Joel, so it couldn’t have been them.
Waiting for the movement to stop, she kept her back pressed up against the wall. When it seemed like the right time to attack, she moved into the kitchen with the baseball bat raised. Instead of attacking, she let out a frustrated sound when she was met with the familiar brown eyes. Sitting on the counter was Joel. In his hands he had a plate and he appeared to be eating a piece of one of the pies she had made earlier today. Joel had no response to her near attack, only a smirk tugged at his lips. Looking down at the bat, Joel took a slow bite of the pie and then looked back up again.
“What the fuck Joel!? You scared the shit out of me!” she snapped at him, squeezing her fingers tightly around the bat. Seeing him sitting there like that had her blood boiling. “I thought you were someone that broke into the home. I was ready to beat the shit out of you with this.”
“I can see that,” Joel snickered, forking another piece of pie into his mouth. “Sorry about that. I didn’t think you would mind.”
“Well you scared the hell out of me. So yeah,” she began, setting the baseball bat down and letting it rest against the wall. “I mind.”
“Sorry,” Joel simply said, his big, beautiful eyes seeming amused at her outburst. Swallowing down what he had in his mouth, Joel hummed. It seemed like only in that moment did he realize how she was dressed. Gazing upon her, Joel’s eyes grew wide and his chewing slowed down. “Fuck Y/N. You look amazing.”
“Joel!” her face grew hot with the way he was eating her alive with his stare. Regardless of his reaction, she was confused as to why he was here in the first place. Even then, he was so lost in appreciating the dress that Rosita had picked out for her to wear that she had to snap her fingers to get his attention. “How did you get in here? Where are the children?”
“The children are with their friends. I came over to pick up my jacket that I left here the other night,” Joel nodded over toward the kitchen table where his jacket was hanging over one of the back of the chairs. She waited for the answer to how he got in and it made him snicker before taking another bite of the pie. “I used to live here Y/N. I know where we hid the spare key.”
“The spare key is meant to be used for emergencies only,” she chastised Joel for just letting himself into her home, but he didn’t seem to give a shit about that aspect. Being mad at Joel was going to get her nowhere because it wasn’t going to change his actions. “Which pie did you grab?”
“There is more than this one?” Joel’s eyebrows perked up when he held it up to show that it was the eggnog pumpkin pie. “I just grabbed whatever was on the top shelf.”
“I did three others. A pecan, cinnamon apple and chocolate silk,” she explained causing Joel’s chocolate brown eyes to get wide when he took another big bite. “It helps me get through the day when I’m alone to bake. I like doing it. Plus, Peter hates pumpkin and pecan. So the apple and chocolate silk are for him.”
“God, I miss being here for the holidays,” Joel mused, setting his plate in the sink after he finished. Reaching for the milk he had already poured himself had her folding her arms out in front of her chest eyeing him over with frustration. “I really love your baking and your cooking. That was my favorite part about the holidays.”
“Clearly,” she noted watching him dramatically adjust his positioning on the counter while he stared out at her again with curiosity. More than anything right now she just wanted him to leave. “Joel? Are you done or…?”
“Why are you dressed so nice?” Joel’s eyes fell to her breasts when he slowly pulled himself down from the counter to step before her. And he wasn’t hiding it either. He was making it very obvious that he was looking. “Are you going out with your friends tonight? Or is there a party that I don’t know about?”
“Do you have to know everything I’m doing? Because it doesn’t matter,” she refused to tell him, getting a scoff to escape him.
“You look really beautiful,” Joel declared outstretching his hand to brush his fingers in over her jawline. With the sensation of his rough fingertips against her flesh it drew her eyes to a tight close. The warmth of his breath lingered over her lips and it drew a chill throughout her body. Fuck, why did he always have to affect her like this. “Who is this for?”
“I’m going on a date,” she admitted, forcing her eyes to open when she took one step back away from him remembering how things were the other day between them. Hearing that she was going on a date had a rush of jealousy flooding through Joel’s veins. “Someone asked me to go to dinner with them and I said yes.”
“Like a date? A date-date?” Joel repeated what she had said, his eyebrows furrowing when she gave a nod. Sure, it was more so two old friends agreeing to go out together one night, but he didn’t have to know that. “With whom?”
“It doesn’t matter,” she refused to tell him taking a few more steps back when his hands fell to his hips. It looked like he disapproved of the situation, but she didn’t care. “I need you to leave though because they should be here soon.”
“How come you never wore something like that for me?” Joel huffed, a muscle at the corner of his jaw flexing. Uncomfortably, she laughed finding herself shaking her head at that question.
“You never took me out on dates,” she reminded him with a frown, her posture changing completely. She went from having a sense of confidence coming down here only to feel the sadness flooding throughout her veins again with Joel looking her over.
“I took you out on dates,” Joel defended himself, his voice growing angrier when she rolled her eyes. Suddenly she felt very ridiculous wearing this and wished she would have picked something a little less revealing.
“It’s been in my closet for a long time Joel,” she stammered, refusing to look him in the eyes when they talked about their past again. “If you would have taken me out on a date, I would have worn it. Most of our time out was with the children. Toward the end of our relationship, you hated going nice places. So my nice clothes kind of just sat there.”
“The only time I remember you wearing any kind of dresses was when we went to the town Christmas party or our anniversaries,” Joel thought aloud, his head shaking when he looked her up and down. “And even at that, they weren’t dresses like that. You may have worn something like that at our last anniversary dinner, but trust me if you wore dresses like that more often…”
“We’d still be married?” she finished for him causing an infuriated sound to fall from his throat. There was that reminder of what he had said after they had sex the other night. “Yeah, I know.”
“That’s not what I was going to say,” Joel snarled, his face twisting in anger when she shook her head and doubted him.
“What were you going to say then?” she waited for him to say something, but she knew it would just be a lie. “It’s exactly what I said. If I would have been a little sluttier, we’d still be married and we’d have more children. I already heard you say it Joel. It’s like you completely forget how you acted toward the end of our marriage.”
“I know I’m not perfect,” Joel placed his hand in over the center of his chest. Right now he just wished she would drop the fight they had the other night. “I made so many mistakes. And I understand that. I wasn’t the best husband. I should have been more supportive. I should have treated you better. I hate the man I was, the man that I am. I don’t need you to tell me how awful I am when I already know.”
Loosening up, she felt her heart sinking over what he had said. That’s not how she wanted him to think about himself.
“I never said that,” she hated hearing him talking about himself like that. “I don’t think you’re awful, Joel. I think you’re a good person. I think you have a lot of heart and you are a good father. You’re a good brother. You just…you weren’t a good husband at the end of our marriage.”
“You got just as sick of me as I did you at the end,” Joel snarled noticing the way her eyes dropped down showing how much she already shut down with the two of them fighting. “For us to have a healthy relationship with our children, we both needed that break. I’ve come to realize that after these last few years.”
“Yeah,” she breathed out knowing that she didn’t want to fight with him about things. Years were spent feeling the exact way she was feeling right now and she didn’t want to feel that way anymore. “I’m sorry.”
Hearing her apologize had Joel’s facial features twisting in confusion. Going to speak, Joel’s lips parted, but he thought about it. Instead of speaking, he shifted on his feet and tipped his head to the side, “For what?”
“For everything,” she let out a defeated breath not knowing what to say to Joel anymore about things. “I’m sorry you didn’t get everything you wanted in life. I’m sorry you’re sad. And more than anything I’m sorry that life isn’t fair. It’s not. You lost your parents. Mine dropped me when I refused to get rid of Elizabeth. It was a lot and I’m sorry that life didn’t give you what you deserved. I wish I could have been the thing to make you happy, but that was never possible.”
“Y/N,” Joel let out a long exhale noticing that her eyes were damp when she shrugged her shoulders. Right now would have been a good time to say something. To make her feel better about the whole situation, but like always, he was at a loss of words.
A knock at the door was heard and Y/N felt her heart sinking. By this point she wanted Joel to be gone, but that obviously wasn’t going to happen. Shakily reaching up, she hoped that she didn’t cry too much because she didn’t want to mess up her make up.
“Can you just cancel the date?” Joel requested shocking her with how blunt he was. “I think the two of us deserve a night where we can talk things out. Actually talk. I don’t want things to be like this. I don’t. And I know you don’t either.”
“I can’t just cancel my date,” she shook her head wishing like hell she had changed the hiding spot for the spare key. “I’m sorry Joel, but whatever you want to talk about—it’s going to have to be for another day.”
Following her toward the living room, Joel wanted to know who was at the other side of the door. Watching her coach herself before opening the door had Joel frustrated. Shooting Joel a glare, she tried to somewhat hide him when she partially opened the door to greet who was there.
“Hey there,” Negan beamed with his deep, raspy voice filling the air. There was a big smile plastered over his features, drawing her attention to his charming dimples. A breath caught in her throat at the sight of Negan before her. He was wearing black slacks, a black button down and a black suit jacket. Never in her time knowing Negan when they were younger would he ever be caught wearing something like that so it surprised her to see. In his hands he had a bouquet of peonies and it made her smile. Stepping in closer to the light, Negan’s smile weakened and an empathetic expression flooded his features. “Are you okay?”
“Oh, yeah,” she waved off his worries, impressed with how preceptive he was knowing that she was upset right now. No matter how much she tried to hide things from Negan in the past too he always knew how she was feeling. “I’m great.”
“You look beautiful,” Negan stated with another weak smile. A moment later the door was being ripped open surprising Negan with the swiftness. Irritation flooded Y/N’s body when she glared over at Joel who was clinging to the doorknob.
“Negan Smith. You’re going on a date with Negan?” Joel was visibly annoyed when he looked to Y/N with his jaw flexing. When she didn’t respond to Joel, Joel threw his hand up in the air drawing his attention back to Negan. Negan seemed unsure of how to react, giving an amused smirk with his eyes narrowing. “Isn’t there some kind of fucking celebrity Christmas party that you have to be at? What the fuck are you doing here Negan?”
“It’s nice to see you too after all these years Joel,” Negan breathed out, lowering the bouquet of flowers at his side. Sarcasm was layered thick in Negan’s words since he picked up on the fact that Joel was being rude immediately to him. “I’m home for Christmas to see my family.”
“First time in what…nineteen years?” Joel snapped at Negan hearing his hesitant laugh fill the air. Knowing that it was Negan Smith that Y/N was going out on a date with infuriated him. Every part of Joel was tense. There was a fire growing inside of his chest and he was furious. “You think that’s funny?”
“Yes and no,” Negan responded, tipping his head from side to side. “I often flew my mother out to wherever I was during Christmas. So, I may have not been here, but I was always with my family. I just decided this year I wanted to come home.”
“I see,” Joel was disgusted with the idea that it was Negan of all people that was the person she was going out with. Curling his fingers into a fist at his side, there was a vein that was bulging at the side of Joel’s neck showing just how angry he was. Both Y/N and Negan picked up on it, but Negan wasn’t acting on it.
“Excuse me for one second,” Y/N held her finger up, walking back into the house.
Silence surrounded Joel and Negan while they stood facing each other. Whistling out, Negan forced himself to look away toward the front window that was lit up brightly. Catching the set up made Negan grin. Moving toward the edge of the porch, Negan looked over the Christmas village that was displayed. Just seeing Negan standing there like this wasn’t a big deal made Joel want to erupt.
“She still collects this stuff, huh?” Negan pointed toward the window, his eyes narrowing when he tried to look through the fogged window to see what she had. “I bought her the first few that she had. I never realized that she would make such a big thing out of it.”
The sound of footsteps returning was heard causing both of them to look back into the house. Heading toward them with Joel’s jacket in her hand, she firmly shoved it against Joel’s chest causing him to grunt. Stumbling back, Joel couldn’t believe that she was this angry with him.
“Joel, you were just leaving,” she alerted Joel, her eyes locked with his hinting to him that she wanted him to leave. With a final shove, she looked to Negan and waved him forward. “Negan, would you please come in so I can grab my jacket?”
“Well, it was nice seeing you again, Joel,” Negan muttered, his head tipping enough to have a fire burning throughout Joel’s veins when Negan stepped around Joel to enter the house. Extending out the flowers, Negan nodded to them and let out a long sigh. “I got you these. I remembered they are your favorite.”
“Her favorite is roses,” Joel corrected Negan who looked over his shoulder as Y/N accepted the flowers. Embarrassment flooded her face when she let out a frustrated breath. Joel was trying to one up Negan in the moment. “Her favorite flower has always been a rose.”
“No, they aren’t,” Negan shook his head, turning on his heel with Y/N moving in beside him. “Sure, she likes roses. Everyone does. But her favorite flower growing up was always the peony. We had a lot of talks about it when we were younger.”
Looking to Y/N for confirmation, Joel could see that Y/N looked ashamed when she nodded her head letting him know that Negan was right, “That’s your favorite flower?”
“Yeah,” she admitted with her voice quiet. Part of her was swooning over the fact that Negan still remembered her favorite flowers after this long, but Joel being offended made things complicated. “I never felt the need to correct you because the roses were your thing.”
“You shouldn’t feel bad about it Joel. A lot of people confuse the peonies with roses,” Negan insisted, pushing his right hand into his pocket and holding his left out to reason with Joel. “It’s a common mistake a lot of people make.”
“Goodnight Joel,” Y/N stressed that she wanted Joel gone because this was already uncomfortable as it was. Giving her one of the most pathetic looks that he had in a very long time, Joel’s chocolate brown eyes hooked with hers. Nodding, Joel pulled his jacket on and back stepped toward the door. “It was nice seeing you.”
Things were quiet when the door closed leaving Negan to look over Y/N who gave him an apologetic look, “If you’re uncomfortable and you’d like me to leave, I can.”
“No, please,” she pled, reaching out to wrap her fingers around his arm. “It’s just Joel right now. That’s the way things are with us. Uncomfortable. It’s not you. He wasn’t even supposed to be here. I came down here and he let himself in which scared the hell out of me,” she let him know what was happening before looking down at the flowers. “Let me put these in some water before we leave and then I’ll be ready to go.”
“Sure thing,” Negan’s eyebrows bounced up as he balanced his weight on his heels. With a single nod, he stood by the door and did what she requested. It took a few moments to get the flowers in some water before she returned to the living room with her jacket. Now standing in front of her window looking at the Christmas village she had set up was Negan who appeared to be eying them over in depth. “These are awesome. They are so much cooler than the first few I got you.”
“I still have those,” she moved in beside Negan pointing each one of them out. Amazement flooded his features, with a big smile tugging at his lips. Stealing a quick look at her, Negan then returned his attention to look over the village and shook his head. “It’s probably my favorite thing that I have for Christmas.”
“You really like decorating, huh?” Negan noted standing up straight again. Leaving him alone meant he got a good look at her overabundance amount of decorating. Pushing his hands into his pockets, he seemed genuinely impressed.
“I overdo it, I know,” she tried to suggest, but he shook his head and chuckled. “I try to make Christmas as magical as possible for my children.”
“I love it,” Negan assured her, pointing toward the train that was circling the Christmas tree. “That’s something I would have loved to have when I was a kid. It’s really cool.”
“It was originally Joel’s idea,” she remembered, swallowing down hard. It was the first thing they bought during their first Christmas living together. It wasn’t much, but it was important to them back then.
“Being in here just makes me feel better,” Negan announced, his hand placing in over the center of his chest. “Lifts my spirits.”
“It usually does that with me too,” she motioned him to wait, knowing that she should probably turn everything off before they went. Once she was done, she returned to him and he seemed to be watching her with awe. “You ready?”
Outstretching his hand, Negan reached for her jacket and she was surprised to watch him holding it up for her to help her get her arms into it. Once she had it on, he smoothed his hands out over her shoulders and sighed loudly, “You look good.”
“Thank you,” she felt a warmth flooding throughout her body with how chivalrous Negan was being. Turning to face him, she felt a breath catch in her throat staring up at him. It really was surprising just how good-looking Negan was. He was cute when they were younger, but now he had really grown into his features. It took her breath away just getting a look at him. The facial hair did wonders for him and she liked the way his hair looked. “It’s strange. You look older, in a very good way. Age did you well. But it’s like other than your looks changing, you’re exactly the same you that I always knew. The manners are there. You remember everything…”
“How could I forget?” Negan retorted with a wrinkle of his nose and a laugh. “We were together every single day for years. I would be a total fucking fucker if I forgot,” Negan stressed and it had her laughing. That made him happy to see her smile since he could tell things were stressful before. “Also, don’t take the manners too seriously. I’m a menace. I still have the mouth of a sailor. I’m still a sarcastic asshole who is absolutely fucking annoying. But I do know how to have chivalry when it’s needed.”
“That’s something a lot of people don’t have, so thank you,” she was impressed when Negan smirked, gave a single nod and then opened the door for her to leave first. When he got out and closed the door behind him, Negan held his hand out to her and she accepted it when he walked her to his car. Helping her get in, Negan opened the passenger seat door for her allowing her the time she needed before closing the door. This was a nice car. She imagined it was a rental for his time here, but she couldn’t help realizing how nice it was. Moving around the car, Negan opened the door and dropped down in his seat beside her. There was a silence between them. Contemplation was flooding Negan’s features and it made her smile. “What is it?
“Would you be horribly offended if I changed my original plans I had for us?” Negan wondered with his eyes narrowing.
“How could I be offended if I never knew the original plans to begin with?” she pointed out drawing his eyebrows to bounce up. “I can’t be mad if you never told me what we were doing to begin with.”
“Good point,” Negan chuckled, the lines in his forehead growing deeper. Taking a moment to think things out, Negan nodded his head and started to drive to wherever he was planning on taking her. “I’m glad we’re doing this. I was afraid you might not want to go out with me after being around all the people wanting to take photos with me and talk to me.”
“I understand people being excited. Life is short, people don’t have a lot of things to be excited about, so let them,” she replied, genuinely meaning it. Noticing that she was cold, Negan adjusted the temperature so she could warm up. “Also, I think you deserve the attention with all the hard work you did. I’m not that kind of person to be miserable if I don’t have your full attention.”
A quick glance in her direction took her breath away with the way that Negan looked at her. Noticing that they were driving toward the edge of town had her wondering where they were going. It was when they pulled into a parking lot where it made her laugh, “Seriously?”
“What? You don’t like it here?” Negan snickered, pulling off his seatbelt when he parked the car in the lot of the local sports bar in town. When they were younger, they would come here to play at the arcade when they were bored. They had cheap food which also made things easier with them being young. “We were here all the time when we were kids. Several times a week. I’m sure the games are more modern now, but it’s us. It’s true to us. Something tells me that you could use a relaxing night and dinner. One where you can just be open and free to be you again.”
Unlatching her seatbelt, Y/N looked out the window to look up at the building letting out a tiny laugh, “Of course unless you don’t want to do this. I can take you to the expensive restaurant that I was originally planning to take you so I could impress you. But, I don’t think I need to impress you. I just want to spend time with you. And after everything? I feel like we’re meant to be here. Not there.”
“I’ll follow your intuition,” she declared which was followed by Negan’s snort. It made her laugh that he still did that considering he was meant to be a heartthrob. Hopping out of the car, Negan had a kick to his step and moved around to help her out. Having Negan’s hand pressing in over the small of her back and leading her toward the building felt good. When they got into the building, she wasn’t surprised that a few people stopped when they saw him. He was a local hero to these people and she wasn’t going to let that get to her. The owner was eager to put them in the nicest spot, which honestly there was no spot that was the nicest spot. It just meant that it was the spot with the most privacy for them while they ate. It was a booth that they both slid into and she looked out at Negan with awe. The way he treated everyone with kindness was impressive. “I really thought you would be so much different if I ever saw you again.”
“Disappointed?” Negan’s right eyebrow arched in curiosity and she shook her head.
“Very impressed,” she corrected him, pulling her jacket from her shoulders. It had Negan eyeing her over for a moment, but he swiftly pulled his eyes from her trying to hide that he stole a look. It made her smile when she adjusted her dress. It didn’t hurt her feelings to know that he stole a glance at her breasts. “We’re both probably a little overdressed. Or in my case, underdressed.”
“I can do the same thing if you’d like,” Negan offered biting down on his bottom lip as he undid a few more buttons on his black button down. He made it go down to about his mid abdomen giving her an amused expression as he lifted his head. It revealed a large amount of his chest drawing attention to the thick curls of hair over his flesh. A rumble of laughter escaped his throat and she covered her eyes in embarrassment. “No, don’t be embarrassed. Look…”
Tugging at the material of his shirt, Negan flashed her his chest revealing one of his nipples and it had her laughing out, burying her head into her hand. His boisterous laughter surrounded her and suddenly she remembered just what it was like to be around Negan. If people saw him in that moment, they would have thought he was crazy.
“You are still so very much Negan,” she rolled her eyes, dragging her tongue across her bottom lip as he let go of his shirt having it fall back into place, yet still leaving the shirt unbuttoned. The bridge of Negan’s nose wrinkled and he was completely proud of himself with that. “I’m sorry about the boobs.”
“I’m not,” Negan winked when she dropped her head down to look at the revealing part of her dress. “It gives me something nice to steal looks at all night. While pretending that I’m not so you can still think I’m a gentleman.”
“So it was a successful dress then,” she sat up straighter when the waiter came to get their orders. The waiter geeked out a little when he realized who he was going to be serving and she was surprised just how many people in this town truly knew who Negan was. Then again, he was born here. So maybe it was something that people told their children about to impress them. “I feel like I’m with an A-list celebrity here.”
“It will be weird when I lose it,” Negan admitted with a long exhale, acknowledging that he was nearing the end of his career. “This season coming up is going to be my last one. My knee just can’t take it anymore and I know once I’m no longer playing people are going to quickly forget who I am.”
“I doubt that. Maybe it won’t be as busy, but you’re pretty unforgettable,” she suggested, pressing her hand in closer to his to place it over his on the table. Hooking his fingers with hers, Negan gave them a squeeze and a wink followed. “People are always going to remember the kindness that you showed them when you were famous.”
“Yeah,” Negan cleared his throat knowing that he didn’t want everything to be about him. “So what do you want to order? A pizza? Or do you want to get some burgers? Or if you’re feeling really special we can get some cheese sticks and chicken wings? Then again if you’re really hungry, I can get all of them.”
“In honor of what used to be…let’s go with the pizza,” she decided, pointing to the menu that was before her with her free hand. When they came here when they were young, they used to always get the pizza because it was the cheapest and they could always share it. “Double cheese and pepperoni?”
“Yes ma’am,” Negan winked ordering for them when the waiter brought their drinks. When they were left alone, Negan knew that they had been being silly, but his mind lingered back to earlier. At first, he picked up immediately that she was upset. So that still lingered in his mind. “Really though…are you doing okay? You looked upset when you opened the door earlier.”
“You were married. I’m sure you get it,” she frowned with a long sigh looking to the hand where her wedding ring used to be years ago. “Maybe you don’t. You didn’t end up divorced.”
“That doesn’t mean we didn’t have our problems,” Negan assured her, his thick eyebrows furrowing. “God knows I was a fool. And we fought a lot too, but I always feel like if you’re passionate about something you are going to feel things so much more deeply. Don’t think my marriage was perfect because it wasn’t.”
“But, you were head over heels in love with her,” she reminded him hearing Negan’s breathing grow louder when she pointed toward the necklace that was around his neck. “Your wedding rings tell me that.”
“I was,” Negan agreed with her, sucking at his bottom lip with her acknowledging his late wife. “I loved her so much that the time I took off last time from baseball was to take care of her while she was sick. Not because I was hurt.”
“See, that’s romantic,” she stressed liking to hear that about Negan. By his expression she wasn’t sure that Negan agreed with her. “I’m sure she appreciated that.”
“She did,” Negan commented, signs of him being uncomfortable talking about his life coming through. “Good job changing the subject though instead of talking about Joel.”
“I just don’t know what to say about things with him,” she confessed, feeling guilty that their conversation was coming right back to Joel. “It’s just no one can get under my skin quite like Joel can. It’s like he knows exactly what to say to upset me or make me feel bad. Sometimes I’m not even sure he knows that he is doing it, but when he does, it burns.”
“I think us men can do that sometimes. Not realize the daggers we hold in our words,” Negan hummed, sucking in a sharp breath of air. Before they could get deep in their discussion, their pizza was being brought followed by a few complimentary appetizers. There were garlic knots, cheese sticks and cheese bread. The owner insisted that it was free even when Negan insisted that he wanted to pay. When they owner left the food with him, it made Negan exhale loudly. “You have money and suddenly everyone wants to give you everything for free.”
“Interesting how that works,” she noted letting out an amused sound when Negan pulled his jacket off and set it aside. It was getting warm in the restaurant. In the distance they could hear the sounds from the large arcade that was in the other room and it made her smile. Negan undid the buttons of his sleeves, rolling them up his arms revealing his tattoos to her. Stretching out her hand, she grabbed one of his arms to look over the tattoos that were there. Dragging her fingertips over his flesh had Negan’s eyes watching her closely. “So much is the same, but so much is different. I knew you had tattoos, but I never saw them close up.”
“There’s a lot more,” Negan informed her with a wink when he dragged his arm back slowly to get a piece of pizza for both of them on their plates.
“I think I know that. I saw a photo from that very revealing shoot you did a while ago the other day,” she confessed to Negan hearing his laugh fill the air. Their conversation reminded her of the pull out that Joel had confiscated from Elizabeth. Hearing that intrigued Negan and she knew that he wanted to say something sexual but didn’t know if he should. His face was red, his eyebrows bouncing up in amusement. Which only added to how ridiculously cute his dimples looked. “I’d love to say that it was me looking it up, but my daughter actually had it. I told you that she had the biggest crush on you. So I saw…a lot of you.”
“Not nearly enough,” Negan joked with her, giving her a wink. Then he considered what she said, snorting at the thought. “It’s a little creepy that your daughter had that though.”
“Joel agreed with you. He tore it down from her ceiling and threw it at me before he left. So it’s sitting in my nightstand drawer,” she admitted to Negan, a laugh escaping her lips at how weird this whole conversation got. “I’ll have to take a better look at that pull out later when I get home.”
“I have a few more tattoos since then,” Negan stated with a crooked smirk not sure how to respond to what she just told him. “Play your cards right and I’ll let you see all of them up close and personal.”
“God,” she groaned out and it was followed by his laugh. Lifting the piece of pizza up, Negan dramatically tipped his head back being silly in the way he was eating his pizza like he used to be when they were younger. “And there is the Negan that I know.”
“You liked that Negan very much, thank you,” he pointed out with a mouthful of the pizza chewing it pretty dramatically and she knew that he was doing it to amuse her. Here they were both dressed up very nice, eating pizza and not being at all dainty about it.
“Of course,” she agreed with him seeing him plow down one piece of pizza before reaching for another for himself. Even though they were flirting back and forth, she couldn’t help but think about her children. “I think Peter would love this place.”
“Your son?” Negan stammered and she nodded. Part of her just wanted to talk completely about Elizabeth and Peter, but she didn’t want to bore Negan with stories. “Why don’t we bring him here once while I’m here? Heaven knows they give us enough food. And you can bring your daughter too.”
“That wouldn’t weird you out?” she was stunned to hear him say that and he smirked. This was their first time being around each other again, but he already was talking about wanting to spend time with her children. “Being around my children?”
“They are part of you. Why would that weird me out?” Negan was genuinely curious why she would think that. “I mean yeah, it might be weird meeting your seventeen year old daughter that had my photoshoot of me almost completely naked. But then I’d be judgmental because I had half naked women on my walls when I was her age. All jokes aside, I would very much enjoy meeting your children.”
“And they would freak out meeting you,” she was sure that would be the case. Peter was hugely into sports and she was pretty sure that Elizabeth had gotten into softball because her and Joel watched baseball together all the time. Probably also to be more like Negan as well. “Peter would ask you a million questions and I feel like Elizabeth would be really quiet. She’s not shy, but around you? She’d get quiet. I’m sure she’d love to talk about baseball with you too though. She’s a softball player and she loves it. But I think she’d start off very shy around you.”
“Only for a little bit. Trust me, I’ve gotten used to the whole shyness thing. I’ve had a lot of meet and greets with fans who came to see me. I always end up getting them to talk by the end of it,” Negan declared with a bob of his head. They both snacked on a few of the appetizers before offering what they had left to the rest of a table of teenagers since it was so much food. Of course the teenagers took it and marked out that Negan gave them free food before allowing him to go back to Y/N. “You ready for some games?”
“You think I will be okay?” she pointed down toward her dress and it had Negan humming out. Snatching his jacket from the seat, Negan held it out for her and she nodded. Having his suit jacket covering her would probably be better than going out there to play in just her dress.
Side by side they walked together in the arcade. It seemed like they went for the things that they did more so as children together. Air hockey, basketball games and other things that drew their attention. A lot of people seemed to leave Negan alone while he was with her in the arcade which impressed her. She thought they would be interrupted more while they were having fun together, but the respect was actually really nice.
Time seemed to fly by with them just having fun together and being silly. It had been so long since she just got to feel like a kid again and do these kinds of things. But it was something she surprisingly enjoyed very much.
By the time Negan won her a gigantic stuffed bear, he led her back toward the table for them to get some drinks since they both had gotten hot from being in the arcade. Negan had put the teddy bear next to him while they sat at the booth and it made her laugh the way he had his arm hooked around the giant bear.
“This has been fun,” she confessed with a laugh when Negan squeezed the bear in closer to him with a one armed hug. It was incredibly hot right now and the both of them were sweating from all they had done. “I can’t tell you the last time I did something like this.”
“Had fun?” Negan blurt out. Originally, she was talking about doing arcade games, but yeah. It had been a while in general that she had fun. So she just nodded. “Well, I’m glad I could convince you to do this with me. You deserve to have some you time where you feel good.”
“You have no idea how much it means to me that you agreed to this,” she sat forward at the table, leaning over it so he could hear her. Truthfully? She shouldn’t have been thinking about their past, but she couldn’t help it. “After how things ended with us when we were younger, I thought you may never want to see me again.”
“Of course I’d want to see you again,” Negan matched her movements, leaning across the table after letting go of the stuffed bear. “We were best friends. I missed that part of me. The Negan I was when we were close.”
“I think we were a little more than just best friends,” she reminded him with an uncomfortable breath. Hearing her say that had a smirk tugging at Negan’s lips, his thick eyebrows bouncing up before he dragged his thumb across his bottom lip.
“I didn’t know what you wanted to admit,” Negan snorted, shrugging his shoulders in a shameless moment. A wicked expression flooded his handsome features and he moved close enough so only she could hear him. “You were the person who gave me my first hand job after all. If you remember all of our time together, that is.”
“How could I forget?” she sucked at her bottom lip seeing the wolfish smile expand over his features. Flirting with him was coming easily and it wasn’t even like she was purposely going out of her way to do it. “You don’t really forget a cock like that.”
“It’s pretty nice,” Negan agreed hearing her let out an amused breath. Dropping his head down, he looked at the center of his lap and growled. How they had gone from innocent to sexual talk was beyond her.
“Obviously you were the first person to finger me,” she whispered looking around the sports bar that they were in knowing that if people heard them talking the way they were that they would likely be eavesdropping on them. “And the first person to eat me out…”
“Many, many times,” Negan snickered reaching for his beer to take a sip of it and he shook his head slowly. There was a warmth flushing into her cheeks and it made him smile. “You’re also the first person to give me a blowjob. Every time we were alone once we reached a certain age, we were always going at each other.”
“We were two bored teens that had way too much freedom with their parents,” she recalled finding her heart skipping a beat with the way that Negan smiled, his dimples doing the very thing they had done to her since they were younger. And that was make her heart flutter and swoon when she looked at him. “Our parents trusted us way more than they should have.”
“My parents thought you were just the sweetest, most innocent girl,” Negan teased her, playing with the neck of the beer bottle when he recalled their years together. “They thought you were the one thing keeping me innocent. Little did they know that you were such a naughty little thing corrupting their son…”
“Oh, don’t you blame it all on me,” she reached out to swat at his hand. Snorting out, Negan lowered his head and let out a long sigh. “You were corrupting me just as much. You were the older one you know.”
“We were so very good for each other,” Negan’s nose wrinkled, taking a longer sip of his beer this time. Setting the bottle down, Negan shifted on his side of the booth and tapped his fingers against the top of the table. “I don’t know why we never had sex.”
“We never had condoms,” she reminded him making him tip his head from side to side. “Then the one time you stole condoms, we went to have sex and your dad walked in on the two of us.”
“Right,” Negan laughed deeply and she rolled her eyes thinking back on the two of them. “My dad was such a dick. Immediately started lecturing us about how my mother was going to have her heart broken if she knew that we were doing that in their house. Then tried to lecture us about how if we had sex we were going to die. My father was a horrible father, but he sure thought he was doing something that night when he told us that the people who had sex were those to die first in horror movies. It wasn’t STDs or pregnancy he warned us about. It was the potential of dying in a Friday the Thirteenth movie. And if you remember after he found us, he put that open door rule on us.”
“I do remember that. You were trying so hard not to laugh. It’s not like it worked though. We still fucked around at my house,” she reminded him with a laugh, shaking her head at the thought. “I think he thought lecturing us would put the fear of God into us, it just made us go to my house more instead of going to yours.”
“But he stole the condoms, so…” Negan huffed with a disappointed expression. They both seemed amused talking about their naughty relationship that they shared together. “I thought you would be the girl I lost my virginity to, but alas, I was fucking wrong.”
“Because the cute blonde haired, green eyed girl came to town and had your eyes,” she suggested which had Negan’s face scrunching up. Hearing her say that had confused him and it seemed like he didn’t understand what she was saying. “Lucille. I’m talking about Lucille.”
“Yeah, I was smitten from the moment that Lucille came to town, I agree. Although, I hate to break this to you Y/N,” Negan stammered, his jaw flexing when he threw his right hand up in the air. “Joel Miller was the thing that made me realize we were never gonna happen. Not Lucille. Joel came first…in both ways.”
“Negan,” she groaned out realizing where he was going with that last statement. It had been a very long time, but she didn’t realize what he was saying was true. “I’m pretty sure Lucille came to town first.”
“Nope, I know for certain you and Joel hooked up before Lucille transferred to the school,” Negan refused, being very expressive in the way he was delivering his lines. “Because I remember the broken heart that came with it.”
“Come on,” she chuckled thinking that he was joking at first, but Negan’s expression was very much solemn when he lowered his stare. What had been a light and silly conversation turned very serious when their past came front and center.
“I’m being honest,” Negan admitted, his long eyelashes fluttering when he lifted his stare to her again. Someone walked by in that moment and they both went silent before he spoke up again. “I was very much in love with you. I thought I was gonna marry you. After all we had been through growing up together, I thought we were soulmates.”
What could she say to that? This conversation seemed to be upsetting Negan when he thought back on it, “When I was on the baseball team you would show up to every practice and game for me. But then after you two got together, it was no longer me that you were there for. It was him. I thought you were my girl, but I learned quickly that you weren’t.”
Silence followed. She didn’t know how to respond when he finished off his beer and cleared his throat, “When you went to that party it was all over. All it took was Joel Miller finally noticing you for you to be hooked and reeled in. First it was him making out with you at that party. Then it was you started to come to practices and the games for him. Not me. You no longer had eyes for me. I was invisible. Then again. I should have expected it. I knew you had a crush on him when we were kids, I just thought when we started fooling around together you and I were dating.”
“Negan, I’m sorry,” she apologized noticing the upset in his hazel eyes and she felt suddenly on the spot. “I never really thought that we were dating. I just thought we were best friends that were experiencing things with each other. You never mentioned us being together so I just assumed…”
“I realized that once you hooked up with Joel,” Negan responded with a grunt, shrugging his shoulders again showing that he was uncomfortable. “It was for the best because you ended up with Joel and I ended up with Lucille, but at the time I was devastated. The woman I was head over heels in love with my whole life just up and left one day.”
“I wish you would have said something,” she breathed out finding it hard to actually look at Negan with the guilt she had in hearing that truth. “I feel like such an asshole. Or ignorant to the truth of how things were because fuck. You must have thought I was such a bitch and…I was. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“You were meant to get with Joel. You have two beautiful children that you love very much,” Negan suggested with a weak smile. It was his way of trying to make her feel better, yet she still felt awful about the whole thing. After thinking about what he said, it was all suddenly starting to make sense why things ended up the way they did. Why Negan disappeared after she started dating Joel. It was her fault all this time, not his. “And I was meant to be with Lucille. They were both important parts of our lives.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” she agreed silently realizing that she actually felt really bad after everything. It was eating away at her knowing that she hurt Negan so much that he thought there was no other way to handle things than to shut her out of his life completely back then.
“I am curious though,” Negan let out an amused breath when the waiter showed up with another beer for him. It was like he had been paying attention to him like a hawk and Negan looked back over his shoulder at the young waiter letting out a snort. Shaking his head, Negan cleared his throat and looked back to her. “What was it about Joel that made you pick him? What made you decide that Joel was the one and not me?”
There was a silence between them when she thought about the answer. It had Negan tipping his head to the side and she didn’t know what to say, “I know you very much enjoyed my tongue and fingers, so that wasn’t it. And I saw Joel naked in the past. You have a type when it comes to men with bigger dicks, but I’m pretty sure mine is just as impressive. My arrogance might take over here and say mine might be bigger. His is just uncut…”
“Negan, it’s not about the penis,” she stressed hearing him letting out a long exhale and she felt like the room was spinning around her. “You both have nice bodies. I didn’t pick Joel because he was better at sex acts than you or because of his penis.”
“Then what was it?” Negan seemed pretty desperate for an answer and it made her feel bad to know that he let it bother him this whole time.
“I wish I had a good answer,” she began realizing that there was really nothing good to say for her to reason with Negan. “I guess that night at the party having Joel’s attention just felt really good. He’d never noticed me before like that and when he finally did, he just made me feel special.”
“And it didn’t help that he was the most popular boy in school,” Negan commented causing her to roll her eyes.
“You were just as popular,” she retorted thinking back to when they were young and how they both got a lot of attention from people. “You both had girls fawning over you with you playing sports.”
“Joel was just the quarterback on the football team and you know how us Americans are with our football,” Negan grumbled under his breath and she wondered if that really was the case for her in the past. Because she felt like she had been in love with Joel from the first moment she saw him “I didn’t make you feel special?”
“You made me feel better than anyone else did Negan,” she corrected him but she could tell that he didn’t believe her. “You were my best friend. You were the most important person in my life. And then you just stopped being part of my life. You never answered my calls. You never came to see me. You left without saying goodbye.”
“I was an asshole. I should have told you,” Negan acknowledged, his raspy voice quiet when he swept his fingers at the top of the table. “I was just so heart broken that I was so mad. I didn’t want to see you. I didn’t want to talk to you and that…”
“Was my fault,” she interrupted him so he couldn’t take credit for the whole thing.
“Our fault,” he added knowing that it took both of them not having the strength to actually talk to each other after things fell apart between them.
“I came to say goodbye to you when I was leaving,” Negan admitted, lowering his head and she could tell that once again he wasn’t comfortable looking her in the eye while he spoke.
“What happened?” she pushed for an answer and Negan’s hazel eyes lifted to meet her stare that was desperate for a response.
“I uh…” Negan thought of what to say, brushing his fingers through his short beard. “I wimped out. I thought you would get mad at me, so I just left.”
“All this time it never hit me,” she was angry with herself when that bomb of a confession was unloaded onto her. “I called you when the kids were born. I wanted you to be Elizabeth’s godfather. You never returned my calls. That was because of this? Because of what I did. This whole time I just thought Lucille wasn’t comfortable with you being my friend.”
“It’s uh…” Negan shifted, his raspy voice changing when he shrugged his shoulders. “It’s complicated.”
“Joel was your best friend too. Unless I’m wrong, but we were all so close,” she remembered what it was like when they were all together as friends. It had Negan smirking and bringing his hand up to drag it down over the front of his face in a stressed movement.
“Yeah, he was,” Negan retorted with a firm nod, biting down on his bottom lip. It looked like Negan wanted to say something, but he stopped and shrugged his shoulders. “I lost my two best friends when the two of you hooked up. I should have just dealt with it. I guess I was just jealous. I’m sorry I became such a shitty friend.”
“It’s my fault,” she owned up to her own decisions that led to her losing Negan in the past. “You can say it was you, but it wasn’t. I had everything in my hands with you and I…”
“Everything that was supposed to happen did,” Negan didn’t want her regretting the choices that she made so long ago. “I see the way you talk about your children. You love them very much and they were meant to be here. I just at the time didn’t understand, but now I do. My journey with Lucille was supposed to happen and yours was meant to happen with Joel.”
“You’re right,” she agreed with him knowing that she would never give up her children, even if she was given a second chance to do things over because her children meant everything to her. “You just deserved better than what you were given.”
“And so did you,” Negan retorted with a tip of his head, sweeping his thumb across his bottom lip. Looking over his shoulder, he started to pull himself from the booth and gave her a weak smile. “I’m going to use the bathroom really quick. I’ll be right back, okay?”
“Yeah,” she looked worried about him, but he waved it off like it was nothing.
Taking notice of the bathrooms, Negan realized there was one in the back that looked like it was the least busy of them all. He needed a moment to breathe after he just let all of that trauma unload after having it pent up for so long. Pushing the door of the bathroom open, Negan moved for the sink and braced his weight against it. Staring out at himself in the mirror, he cussed to himself knowing that he didn’t want to question her like that since he wanted to give her a good time, but it just came out. He felt like such an asshole knowing that he was going to make her feel guilty about everything that she knew.
Turning the water on cold, Negan threw some water in his face and heard the sound of the door pushing open. Looking over his shoulder, Negan saw that it was Y/N standing at the door. Standing up slowly, he turned off the water and turned to face her with his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat. Giving Negan a once over, she reached behind her to lock the door to the bathroom. Bracing himself back against the sink, Negan assumed that she was going to erupt on him for throwing all of that on her.
Instead, she stepped forward and he felt her fingers stretching out to curl around the side of his neck. A soft tug brought him down to her for her lips to brush against his in the most tender of sweeps. It lingered for a moment before another kiss grew between them. It had her stepping closer to him with her tipping up on her toes to deepen the caress of her mouth against his. Bracing his hands against her hips, Negan cherished the warmth of her before him. With each second their kiss grew more passionate with her parting her lips allowing the warmth of his tongue to brush against hers.
Grunting out, Negan felt her fingers dragging down over his abdomen to reach for his belt to start pulling it apart. The tug was rough, pulling his hips toward her when she got it open. Tugging apart his pants and then dragging down the zipper had her palm dipping beneath the material of his pants and boxer briefs for her to curl her fingers around the root to his masculinity.
“Wait,” Negan groaned against her lips, pulling away slightly while she unhurriedly caressed over his semi-erect cock. Shaking his head, he knew that he would be angry at himself later if he realized that she was doing this out of guilt. “You don’t have to do this to make me feel better. That’s not why I did this. I don’t want you to do this out of guilt.”
“It’s not,” she assured him, nipping faintly at his bottom lip and it had him lowering down in closer to her. Raspy moans from Negan followed when she easily got him rigid in her grasp. Pulling him from behind the material of his pants had her dropping her eyes down to look over his manhood. Licking his lips, Negan’s eyelids were heavy. “Wow.”
“You act like you’ve never seen it before,” Negan growled with amusement in his tone. “Other than Lucille, I’m not sure there is anyone that’s seen it more than you.”
“It’s been a long time,” she reminded him, testing his flesh in her palm keen on watching his response. “I’m still impressed. And you are so fucking hot now…”
“I wasn’t then?” he teased her, his hips slightly bucking up toward her touch. Hovering his lips over hers made her smile.
“Every time felt like the first time with you,” she slurred, kissing softly at his bottom lip. Stepping back, she brought her fingers up to her lips. Sucking faintly at the tips, she was quick to drop her hand back down. Using that to slick it against his shaft making it easier to jerk him off. It had him clinging to her, his nose nuzzling in against the side of her neck. He was like puddy in her hands, his body shaking at the excitement to be near her again. “You are perfect. You always were.”
“No, I’m not,” Negan declared with a shake of his head, his lips crashing down over hers to steal another kiss. Purring out against his flesh, she liked the way that Negan reacted to every touch. How it seemed like it would be the end of the world if he didn’t kiss her. Every kiss from him took her breath away and it was so vastly different from what she was used to with Joel. Lowering his left arm, he curled it around her waist and spun her so that her back was pressed against the wall. Dragging his hands down over her sides, Negan’s fingers reached the bottom of her dress and he tugged it up slightly. Hooking eyes, he wanted to make sure that she wanted this. Caressing up over her thigh toward her warmth had her biting back a sharp exhale. Pushing aside the material of her panties, Negan’s rough fingertips traced over the length of her sex. Moaning out, her hips pressed in closer to him wanting to have that contact. Kissing over her jawline, Negan moaned against her flesh with her continuing to jerk him off. It had his hips bouncing up toward her caress and Negan was already a much more verbal lover showing her that he appreciated what she was doing. “You have no idea how much I’ve fucking missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too,” she whispered, turning in toward him so she could bring their lips together. Crying out against his lips, she felt one of Negan’s long, slender digits taking its time to thrust into her having her purring out. With her free hand, she sank her fingers into Negan’s hair and did her best not to cry out when he added another. The speed of his fingers inside of her matched the way her hand sheathed his heated flesh in her grasp. “Negan…”
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” Negan mouthed against her lips, his moans growing deeper when his tongue brushed against hers. Their breathing was loud and broken. Both of them desperate to touch the other. Be near each other. Everything from their past was quickly coming back to them. And it all felt right.
Nuzzling his nose in against hers, their foreheads pressed together. The warmth of his breath felt incredible over her lips while his fingers knew just the right spots to hit. This was something they would have done when they were younger and it felt like they were falling back into things again so easily.
“Fuck,” she whimpered out against his lips noticing just how much her body was shaking. Pretty quickly he had found the right spot inside of her to focus on. It was crazy how easily Negan caught onto things by paying attention to her expression. Determination flooded his body, the look he was giving her causing her heart to pound harder inside of her chest. Trying to stand steady on her feet was hard to do because her legs were trembling. A fire was building inside of her. Slamming her eyes shut, she buried her face against Negan’s shoulder biting back on the cries that wanted to escape her. Thankfully Negan had her pressed firmly against the wall where she could brace herself against his body. By the sensation and pressure that was building up inside of her, it made it feel like the room was spinning around her. The sensation was new in the best of ways but also made her nervous. “Negan…Negan…I think…”
“It’s okay, let it happen,” Negan hushed her, covering her mouth with his. It was like he knew he was going to have to do his best to keep her quiet. Tightening her grasp around his erection elicited a deep, raspy growl that sent chills down her spine. Clinging tightly to him, her hips rocked against the movements of his fingers. An addictive, euphoric sensation was sweeping over her. Throwing her head back, she was having a hard time focusing on anything other than how good everything felt. Not wanting to take his eyes off of her, Negan’s lips parted. A muscle at the corner of his jaw flexed and he seemed just as much into this as she was. Involuntarily her thighs started tremoring and by the rushing ache that flooded to her head, she felt like she could almost pass out. Approaching her orgasm, she stole another kiss from his lips. Wet sounds started to fill the air with his fingers still moving as she came. Even though she wanted to fall against him, she kept up with caressing his length in steady, fluid movements. Every part of her felt like it was on fire with Negan thrusting his hips up toward her grasp. “Fuck…”
Forcing herself to look down, she purred out seeing the first line of cum shoot out from the tip of his cock. Burying his head against the side of her neck, Negan’s moans vibrated against her flesh while she worked to milk him completely in her hand. Slowing down her movements, she continued her slick caress over his body focusing at the red, swollen tip.
Grunting, Negan’s free palm caressed in over the side of her neck, capturing her jaw between his index finger and thumb. Looking down between them, Negan licked his lips when she released his body and it twitched a few times, “Are you okay?”
“I don’t know,” she admitted, panting as she spoke. The floor was wet from what Negan had done to her and she could barely catch her breath. “I uh…I’ve never done that before. That was…new?”
“Really?” an arrogant smile followed and it made Negan look entirely too cocky. But that was the Negan she knew. The Negan she grew up with. “Good. I’m glad you shared your first time with me.”
Negan brought their lips together again in a kiss that was slow, allowing her to still come down from her high, “I learned some things over the last few years. The female body is a very interesting subject.”
“No kidding,” she half laughed, using her free hand to caress down over the side of his chiseled jawline. There was something in the way that Negan looked at her that made her feel incredibly special. It took her breath away. Even when they were done, she was impressed with the way that he helped clean her up before cleaning himself up. Gathering herself, she couldn’t help but be in awe of him. Bracing herself against the sink, she knew that she was still trembling, likely looking like a mess.
Working his pants back together, Negan approached her. Having the warmth of him near had her trembling all over again, “Negan?”
“Yeah,” Negan lowered his head, nudging her nose with his.
“Do you…” she considered what she was going to ask, swallowing down hard. Wetting her lips, she found her heart skipping a beat at the way he turned into her palm to press a tender kiss over the center of her hand. “Do you want to go home with me?”
Slightly turning his head, Negan rubbed his cheek against her hand. The roughness from his short stubble tickled at her flesh before he gave her a big smile, “Do you want me to go home with you?”
Tipping his head back drew attention to the prominent vein at the side of Negan’s neck. It was hard to gather words. But more than anything she knew her answer. And that was yes. Nodding once had Negan snickering and he clicked his tongue at the top of his mouth.
“Then yes, I would love to go home with you,” Negan slurred, lifting his hand to hook his fingers with hers. “I’d like that very fucking much.”
----
Tags: @chainsawsangel @fancypeacepersona @violent-darkness @negansbestie @elegantfanficluv
@sanctuaryforthelost @dead-of-niight @dilfsandmartinis
#Joel Miller#Negan#The Walking Dead#The Last of Us#Joel Miller fanfiction#The Last of Us fanfiction#Negan fanfiction#Jeffrey Dean Morgan#Pedro Pascal#negan x reader#negan smith#negan x you#negan fanfiction#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#tlou fanfiction#twd fanfiction#negan smut#The Walking Dead fanfiction
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kiss me thru the phone
boyfriend! matt sturniolo x reader
summary: reader and matt do long distance until reader surprises him on tour.
warnings: swearing, pet names (baby, beautiful), kissing.
a/n: i love this song ❤️❤️
READERS POV
“i miss your beautiful face.” my boyfriend, matt says.
we were on facetime because he moved to los angeles with his brothers to pursue their career. we met in middle school in boston and i still live there.
“you’re looking at it.” i giggle.
“i know but i miss kissing it. hopefully i’ll get to see you while we’re in boston.” he says. matt and his brothers were about to go on their second tour. little did matt know, i had tickets to the boston show AND the des moines show in iowa.
pretend there was a boston show on the versus tour.
“i know baby. even if you don’t have to time to stop home i’ll camp outside the venue even if i’m able to see you for only a minute.” i tell him.
“kiss me through the phone.” matt randomly says.
“what?” i ask, making sure i heard him right.
“kiss me through the phone, come on.” he repeats, moving his lips closer to the phone. i giggle and do the same.
4 days later
📍des moines, iowa
“okay and before we go we have one more person we want to come out and say a few words.” nick says into the microphone, grabbing another microphone from one of the venue workers. nick and chris were in on the secret.
matt sends chris a confused look and chris just shrugs.
“i’d like to welcome y/n l/n to the stage!” nick smiles and the crowd goes crazy as i walk out onto the stage. i wave to the crowd before locking eyes with matt. he stands there, his eyes wide and his mouth open. chris quickly grabs matt’s microphone as matt makes his way towards me.
“you’re here.” he says softly.
“congrats on the win baby.” i smile. matt pulls me into him and places a quick kiss on my lips. we keep it brief because we’re on stage.
“okay let me talk.” i whisper pulling away as nick hands me the second microphone.
“okay hi everyone! i want to apologize now for any stuttering or anything i’ve never spoke in front of a crowd this big. if you don’t know me, hi i’m y/n, matt’s girlfriend.” i speak and the crowd screams. chris, nick and matt make their way to my sides.
“these boys mean so much to me. like more than words could explain. i’m gonna tell the story on how we met, but i’m gonna keep it brief because i could talk about it for literal hours. i actually met chris first. we were in the same class in second grade and we were both alone at recess so we just became friends with each other. chris has been the person i went to for anything from that moment on. he was the first person i told about my huge crush on matt.” i say, giggling softly.
“he has always supported me through everything and when i was in the wrong he always told me so i really appreciate that.” i look at chris as i say this, pulling him into a hug.
“woo i will probably end up crying so ignore that. nick is genuinely the love of my life.” i say, laughing when i see matt’s offended look. “all jokes aside, i know nick would do anything to protect me and he has done anything to protect me. i remember this one time a guy wouldn’t leave me alone and when he tried to pull me to his car nick literally tackled him.” i said, causing the crowd to laugh.
“i really appreciate everything you do for me.” i hug nick and move to stand next to matt.
“oh god matt where do i start.” i mutter softly. “my crush started on matt during the summer of 8th grade. we didn’t end up getting together until senior year but that’s besides the point.”
“seeing matt grow up and over come his fears makes me so proud. i remember when he would never order his own food and now he’s talking to and standing in front of thousands of people everyday. so i’m really proud of him for that. i remember when i realized that i was in love with matt. i have a little sister and one time she fell and when i had turned around to help her matt was already helping her. and then he cleaned up the cut on her knee and put a bandaid on it. i don’t know why but that was when i realized i was in love with him. matt is my best friend and lover all in one. he knows me like the back of his hand and he can so easily read my emotions.” my eyes slowly start to fill with tears and matt wraps his arms around my waist from behind me.
“i don’t have much time left so i have to word this strategically. the fact that they’re just three boys from massachusetts is crazy to me. i don’t think they’ve realized how many people they’ve helped, including myself. these three boys right here are living proof that dreams do come true and you can do it so don’t let anyone tell you differently. they are my people, the one ones i actually want to be around and the ones i would do anything for. and i want this forever.” i say, my voice cracking as tears falling down my cheeks. i notice nick and chris both have tears too.
“nick, matt, chris. i’m so beyond proud of you and i love you more than life itself. i’m so grateful that i met you guys because i would not have made it today without you guys.” i speak, my voice cracking. i see matt’s eyes have tears but he’s trying to not let them fall. we all do a big group hug, say goodbye to the crowd and walk off stage.
i gasp softly as matt pulls me back into him. his arms go around my waist and mine go around his shoulders.
“you okay matt?” i ask. he doesn’t respond and i feel hot tears on my shoulder.
“baby..” i say softly, pulling him impossibly closer.
“i’m really glad you’re here.” he tells me, pulling away but he keeps his arms around me.
“surprise!” i giggle as he places his lips on mine.
yn.ln


🏷️ christophersturniolo 🏷️ nicolassturniolo


🏷️ matthew.sturniolo
liked by: mattandynfp27894 , christophersturniolo and 154,927 others
yn.ln - so beyond proud of my boys <3
65,204 comments
matthew.sturniolo - i love you so much
↳ yn.ln - i love you more.
user - her speech that she gave 🥹🥹
christophersturniolo - tried so hard to keep it together during your speech. love you always ❗️
↳ yn.ln - love you chris 🧡
user - the way they all cried during her speech. they all mean so much to each other.
*liked by yn.ln*
nicolassturniolo - my mf soulmate. I LOVE YOU FOREVER
↳ yn.ln - I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU 💜
matthew.sturniolo - so lucky to have you ❤️
↳ yn.ln - you mean so much to me ❤️❤️
a/n: hi !
#matt sturniolo#matt sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo fandom#sturniolo x reader#spotify
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much ado about nothing chapter 8 - plug!eren x reader - 18+!!!

DISCLAIMER: this post contains MATURE CONTENT that is intended only for those over 18. minors and ageless blogs, please do not read below the cut.
um. hi. i am so nervous about posting this i could die, not because anything too significant happens, but it's been so long. this is not a super action-y chapter, but it's necessary, so bare with me. there's a good bit between the lines, so if anything's confusing, hit up my ask box or just hit me up to chat bc i love this story. we're getting close to the end, but i am .... sad about it. i love this eren. i love much ado. without further theatrics from me.... enjoy!!!!! <3
specific cws: swearing, mentions of drug use, alcohol, mentions of sex
want to catch up? series masterlist here<3
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“Love is like a child, That longs for everything it can come by.” - The Two Gentlemen of Verona by William Shakespeare (Act III, Scene 1)
“It’s about time you got up! I got bagels from– oh, hey,” Historia falters when she catches sight of you and Eren, finally having made your first appearance for the day even though it’s well past 10:00.
“You again?” Ymir says with a snicker, walking past Historia with the aforementioned bagels swinging beside her legs with every step.
“Ymir!” Historia hisses, shooting you an apologetic look. Your face warms, knowing exactly what you look like right now: hair a mess, bruises covering your neck and chest, and the telltale sheen of guilt practically glowing in a halo around your head. Eren’s not much better off; there are angry red scratches down his entire back under his hoodie, and his eyes are hooded and heavy with that satisfied, I just got laid glimmer to them. He looks good like this, you think, sluggish and weighted down with the work he’d put in on your body all night and all morning. Cocky and satiated.
“Where are the bagels from?” You peek into the bag that Ymir dropped on the counter, shaking yourself out of your private admiration and sidestepping the obvious elephant in the room in favor of filling your grumbling stomach.
“That place on Melrose, but I only got three…” Historia looks sheepishly to Eren in apology.
“He’s on his way out,” you answer for him. Eren nods affirmatively, shuffling over to the doorway where his enormous sneakers are thrown alongside a small collection of yours and Historia’s shoes.
“Leaving so soon?” Ymir’s eyebrows raise in uncharacteristic interest, looking between you and Eren, who don’t seem able to truly meet each other’s eyes.
“Busy,” Eren grunts, slipping his shoes on, “I’ll see you–”
“Tuesday, right?” You say around a mouthful of bagel, still not quite meeting his gaze.
“Tuesday,” Eren looks to the sky like he’s mentally penciling you in to his schedule, nodding after a moment, “got it.”
“Merry Christmas!” You call out as he makes his exit, throwing a hand up in acknowledgement and farewell. A few heavy seconds of silence pass, the only sound in the room being the noisy smacking of the cream cheese bagel that you’re practically inhaling as Historia stares at you.
“That was…awkward,” Historia starts cautiously. You frown at her.
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve never seen two people that just fucked look less like they want to be in the same room,” Ymir says from the couch, punctuating her statement with a sharp laugh, “I mean, is it that awkward when you have sex?”
“It wasn’t awkward,” you cross your arms defensively, narrowing your eyes, “we’re just…casual.”
“Eren looked sort of tense,” Historia adds thoughtfully, a little line of worry appearing between her eyebrows.
“I’m sure his family’s been talking to him a bunch with the holidays coming up. Maybe that’s it, I wouldn’t know,” you shrug, not meeting Historia’s gaze. You can almost feel her smug, understanding nodding, seeing right through you.
“So you’re still not talking, then.”
“Of course we talk. You just watched us talk.”
“Not like you used to,” Historia counters, crossing her arms.
“So?” You scoff, letting your annoyance erupt in the form of tearing your bagel into little bite-sized pieces. Historia’s right, she’s right way too often for you to live with.
“You liked him. A lot. And he liked you. What happened?”
“You never told us,” Ymir echoes from the couch, “the last thing you told me at least was that you and Sasha went to Scout’s, Eren practically fought Floch, you slept with him for some reason after that, and the next thing we know, he’s here every morning.”
“Not every morning,” you mumble, rolling your eyes petulantly.
“That doesn’t matter,” Historia says impatiently, waving Ymir off, “it’s been weeks of…I don’t even know what to call it– this weird, awkward no-talking just-fucking thing. What happened?”
“We made up,” you shrug, staring at her blankly, “we’re fuck buddies. It’s not something that needs to be, like, picked apart and analyzed.”
“It absolutely does,” Historia argues, “you went from making goo-goo eyes at each other and staying up all night hogging the couch to what may the be the weirdest fuck-buddy relationship I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
“It’s not weird,” you groan, throwing your hands over your eyes in exasperation.
“Is it Breeze?”
“What?” you hiss, pulling your hands from your face to narrow your eyes at Ymir, “what would this have to do with her?”
“I heard she’s staying for awhile, just moved into those snazzy new apartments across from the farmer’s market.” Ymir is either unaware of or unphased by your immediate aggression. She delivers her statement matter-of-factly, twirling one of her many rings idly. Her nonchalance makes you prickle, and Historia notices.
“Is it Breeze?” Historia asks, watching your reaction carefully. “Are she and Eren talking again? Or is he with you?”
“I don’t know what Eren does in his free time,” you roll your eyes, “much less if he’s got anything going on with Breeze right now. It’s not my business.”
“Granted, I don’t see how he could even find the time to deal with Breeze with how often he’s over here,” Ymir scoffs.
“Don’t you two have packing to do?” you ask in a desperate attempt to change the conversation topic. Luckily, Ymir takes the bait.
“We finally finished,” she shoots Historia a meaningful glance, “but our flight doesn’t leave for another four hours, so we don’t need to head to the airport until noon.”
Great. Your patience has already worn thin with the both of them for the day, and just as you’re formulating a plan to bid them goodbye and drag your exhausted body into a shower, Historia jumps ahead of you with yet another question that you don’t necessarily want to answer.
“Have you heard from your mom?”
“Bits and pieces,” you answer, twiddling the hem of your t-shirt between your fingers, “she and Tom are in Costa Rica right now.”
“No invite?” Ymir questions wryly, cocking an eyebrow. Historia shoots her a reprimanding glare, but Ymir’s callous humor is exactly what you need at the moment.
“Of course not,” you say with a chuckle, shrugging, “but she sent me some sweet pictures. They’re cute together.”
“I think Tom is my favorite of the recent boyfriends,” Historia concedes with a small smile.
“He’s definitely better than that asshole from Dubai, that’s for sure.” Ymir nods affirmatively, the unspoken voice of reason in relation to your mother’s dating life.
A few minutes of idle chit chat later, you’re able to excuse yourself to shower, ducking behind the curtain and into the steaming, nonjudgmental spray of water. Your theory these days is that turning the water up to an unbearable heat may scald the weight of everything on your mind off of your shoulders. It hasn’t worked yet, but you’ll keep trying.
Christmas isn’t your favorite season by any means, not since your parents’ divorce. It’s a solitary season for you, one for contemplation and baking. You don’t not enjoy spending Christmas’ alone; after so many years, you’ve started your own little traditions, and while you know the concept of someone spending Christmas alone is objectively sad, you’ve grown to prefer your own company over that of your mother and her boyfriend of the year. She’ll send you her American Express information along with a text to “Go crazy! Anything your little heart desires!” and you’ll spend Christmas Eve playing Santa for yourself, watching movies, and stuffing your face with whatever sugary treat you decide to throw together.
Okay, maybe it is a little sad, but it’s your tradition.
Ymir and Historia leave for the airport, and unsurprisingly, Historia begs you to catch a flight to come with them because “No one should be alone on Christmas!”. You only falter when Ymir begrudgingly extends an invitation, the first year in the three you’ve known them that she’s done so. Ymir shrugs and blushes when you and Historia stare at her in disbelief, claiming it’s because you seem like you have a lot on your mind. She’s not wrong, but you wave them off to Ymir’s parents’ anyway, assuring them you’ll Facetime on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, just to check in.
You don’t consider Historia’s offer until you’ve curled up under a blanket, the fifth or sixth mind-numbing, standard Christmas movie you’d selected not quite doing the trick of silencing your thoughts. You open your phone, pull up your recent texts; maybe reaching out to someone for some lazy, technology-driven conversation will do the trick.
First is Historia, per usual, sending you a barrage of selfies of her and Ymir’s family playing a board game. Even in your melancholy state, the sight of Ymir with her mouth stretched comically wide around a plastic game piece, scowling through her ridiculous expression, makes you snort to yourself.
Second is your mother, sending you an update about her and Tom’s dinner reservation getting canceled amidst short-staffing at the resort restaurant. You roll your eyes at that one; for your mother, the end of the world will surely present itself as a minor inconvenience at a five-star establishment.
Third is Sasha, checking in amidst the holiday season. She tells you that Hitch loved the little self-care package that she put together as a thoughtful, but casual Christmas gift. You text your congratulations back to her, feeling an unfair pang of envy hitting you.
Fourth is…oh, god, you shouldn’t have let yourself get this far. Eren. He’s still saved in your phone as “Eren 10 Shadows User Jaeger”; instead of making you giggle, his idiotic, self-placed contact name only makes a hollow thud ring through the confines of your empty chest. Feeling a bit like twisting the knife, you start scrolling through your texts, frowning at how short and unsubstantial each message is.
> Outside.
> tonight? 10ish?
> Be there in 10.
> i can venmo you for the doordash
> Don’t worry ab it.
The most painful part of all of it is, if you scroll just a bit further, back into the crisper autumn months, the messages aren’t so dry. In fact, in hindsight, Eren seems smitten with you. The messages still give you butterflies.
> Are you in your office was gonna pick up 104 otw to yours but I don’t want it to get cold.:)
> Is developing the six eyes the key to getting you to like me as much as you like Gojo?
> Just did a drop at the library and spied you w your kiddos across the room I didn’t say hey bc I didn’t want you to yell at me (bc youre rude) but you look HOT.
> Got your fav cookie dough to soften the blow for you when we start shibuya arc tonight be there in 10 nerd.
You groan and toss your phone to the other end of the couch, digging the heels of your hands into your eyes. What are you doing? Why can’t you just talk to him, tell him that he’s all you think about, that every time he touches you, you swear that it burns an imprint into your skin?
Because it’s not real, your mind helpfully supplies. Breeze. Luke. Rumors. You’re clearly not over Luke if you drunkenly texted him that night at Paradis, right? Or maybe you’re projecting your old feelings for Luke onto Eren? Is that really something you’re prepared to gamble with?
And if you weren’t mess enough, Eren’s only been the commitment type for one woman in his life; out of the many that you know have rotated in and out, your statistical chance of becoming the second is slim. Not to mention the fact that the only woman he’s ever committed to has just moved in a whopping five minutes down the road from you, and is apparently interested in re-opening doors that you had assumed were closed.
With a huff, you grab your phone from where it's nestled into the cushions and check the time. 11:04pm. Still plenty of time to run down to the bodega and scrounge around for some cookie dough, maybe a cheap bottle of wine.
That’s motivation enough to shake you out of your wallowing state, and after you’ve pulled a pair of slouchy gray sweatpants over your pj shorts and thigh-high socks, you’re shoving your feet into some slippers and shuffling down the street, arms crossed over your chest in a feeble attempt to protect yourself from the biting wind. The shock of the cold numbs you to the bone, a welcome reprieve from the watery, shaky feeling that’s been brewing in your chest all night. You storm through it, noticing your breathing get a little looser with every step, feeling very much like you could stay out here all night, leave all of your problems cooped up in your lonely little apartment.
The bodega’s a certifiable ghost town, as expected. You only have your lucky stars to thank that the owners aren’t religious and are willing to stay open this late the night before Christmas Eve. You give a weak wave to the heavyset man behind the counter, a gesture that he doesn’t return. Figures.
Luckily, with most of the students on campus having left for home days ago, the shelves and refrigerators are still mostly-stocked with everything you’ll need. Item 1: cookie dough. A pack of the Pilsbury reindeer sugar cookies should do nicely; delicious and small enough that eating the entire package won’t depress you too much. Item 2: cheap wine. You round the corner a bit too quickly in your excitement, running headfirst into a tall stranger that you didn’t notice upon entering the store.
“I’m so sorry, I wasn’t–” your voice cuts itself off as the man in question’s irritation slowly slides off of his face. A tentative murmur of your name comes through wind-chapped lips, bloodshot eyes widening in surprise.
“What are you doing here?” Eren’s brow crinkles almost comically, furrowing into a frustrated little divot between his reddened eyes as he tries to make sense of why you’re standing in front of him. “It’s Christmas Eve.”
“Technically not for another forty minutes,” you counter, checking your watch, “and I could ask you the same thing.”
“You know me, not exactly the family type.” Eren shrugs, a bit of the tension melting off of him. And he isn’t wrong; you do know. During the period of yours and Eren’s less-complicated friendship, he had divulged little bits and pieces of his home life, not enough to give you the full picture, but at least enough that you feel like an ass for not realizing why he was spending Christmas alone. Dead mother, asshole father, overbearing stepmom, try-hard brother. You can’t exactly blame him.
He looks heartbreakingly soft; wrapped in one of his classic massive hoodies, hair tucked beneath a cozy beanie, nose and cheeks kissed slightly pink from the cold winter winds. He’s clearly stoned, eyes heavy, muted, and slow-moving as he looks down at you. It’s all you can do to hold yourself back from cupping his face, breathing warmth back into him. Your fingers clutch a little tighter around the cookie dough in your hand, mimicking the swell of emotion that chokes your heart in your chest.
“Right, sorry.”
“That brings us back to square one. What are you doing here?”
The longing for closeness in your heart hasn’t quite outweighed the sadness and awkwardness of the situation, and you opt to deflect again. Unhealthy, but functional. “Buying wine.”
“And cookie dough?” Eren raises an eyebrow at your currently-occupied left hand. “Did you just get dumped by Santa?”
You narrow your eyes at him. “No. It’s my Christmas tradition.”
When Eren’s gaze softens into something thoughtful, green eyes raking painfully over your bundled-up form, you realize you’ve let your guard down. Even that simple statement has bared something to him, given him yet another piece of you to hold– maybe to drop. It sends a nervous chill over you, and you drop your eyes to the floor amidst a pregnant moment of understanding silence.
“Here.”
You flit your gaze back up to Eren’s outstretched hand. He’s holding a bottle of Pinot Grigio– your favorite kind of cheap Pinot Grigio, at that. When you dare to look up at his face, you can’t read it, no surprise there, but if you had to guess? Something like warmth, something like the beginnings of a familiarity you hadn’t realized had been growing.
When you hesitate to take it, a little too long apparently, Eren pulls the bottle back up to his face, squinting at it, and moving it further and closer from his face. With a stuttered chuckle, you realize he’s trying to read the label.
“Is this not the one? I swear I saw it in your fridge–”
“No, that’s it.” You reach up and pull the bottle from him, momentarily shaken out of your stupor. “Where are your glasses? Were you planning on stumbling around the bodega asking the clerk to read all the labels for you?”
“I left ‘em at your house forever ago,” Eren admits, a bashful hand running over the back of his neck, “keep forgetting to grab them on my way out.”
“That’s right.” Your face grows warm at the mention of Eren– the same Eren who’s in front of you, adorably bundled up and cheeks pink with embarrassment– in your home. The things Eren’s been doing in your home as of late.
More like I’m not giving you enough time to grab them, you reflect with a grimace. Eren’s presence in your life has been hot and momentary over the last weeks since your run-in at Scout’s; you’ve made a habit of not keeping him around long enough for conversation, pleasantries, even so much as nabbing those readers out of your nightstand. Even after this short interaction, a vicious stroke of memory reminds you why you’ve kept your distance– Eren’s charming. He’s thoughtful, he’s kind, he’s funny, he’s so careful with you sometimes it makes your fingers shake. And now, with him beginning to turn away from you, giving you a sad and half-hearted goodbye and preparing himself to check out with whatever meager snacks he’s gathered, you don’t think you can keep observing your emotional vigil anymore.
The first flutters of snow have begun to coat the ground and there’s a cold, Christmas wind rattling at the shop windows and you’re holding the bottle of wine to your chest so hard you might be bruising your ribs when you decide to take a chance on him.
“Eren!”
He turns on his heel slowly, as if he’s about to raise his hands and call a truce. His eyes betray nothing but confusion, but if you squint, if you let yourself believe just a bit…you want to believe that he looks a little hopeful.
“Do you…do you want to come over?”
“Right now?” Eren cocks his head in disbelief. It crushes you a little how far out of the realm of possibility it’s become for you to just…want to spend time with him. The blow to your ego and his lack of immediate response nearly bring your newfound courage to its knees, but you push on.
“I can’t eat all of these by myself,” you lie, “and I have better food than that in my pantry.”
Eren eyes the two bags of chips he’s holding in one hand, looks back at you almost like he’s waiting for the punchline. You do your best to smile in a friendly, I-totally-won’t-cry-later-if-you-say-no type of way and snatch another bottle of wine off the shelf.
“I think they’re two-for-one anyway,” you say with an airy chuckle, “no one needs to be alone on Christmas.”
A shaky smile shatters Eren’s hesitant expression, and he cocks an eyebrow, raises his hooded eyes to the sky like he’s thinking it over. “Uh…yeah, I guess I have room in my schedule to keep you company.”
“Oh, get over yourself,” you scoff, the relief viscerally warming you from your growing smile to your fingertips, “and you’re buying after that one.”
“Some fucked up plan you got there,” Eren chuckles to himself, placing your wine and snacks on the counter, “tracking your fuck buddy down at the bodega and guilting him into buying you wine and snacks.”
“Eren,” you hiss, smacking him in retribution, masking the burn of his choice of words with embarrassment. It’s true, you’ve both wordlessly agreed upon it, but the reminder stings. You shoot an apologetic look to the clerk, but he’s entirely apathetic, reciting the total to Eren in a monotone voice. Your unnecessary chagrin only makes Eren giggle harder, earning him an eye roll from you.
The short walk back to your car is filled with some intentional tightrope walking between unnecessary etiquette (Eren insisting upon walking with you to your apartment, saying he’ll grab his car later; you pulling your Venmo app up, trying to assure him that making him pay was a joke) and the banter that you’d established between yourselves upon first meeting, the easy conversation you used to enjoy whenever you liked. Even as you both lull into that familiar rhythm of jokes, stomping through the light dusting of snow side-by-side, you can feel the precariousness of it all. Who’s going to be the first to decide that you’re too close? Who’s going to run away? Who’s going to wish they had run after them?
“Smells nice in here,” Eren remarks, bending down to tug at the laces of his heavy Docs once he’s made it past the threshold of your door.
“It’s about to smell even better.” Suddenly overcome with nervous jitters that Eren’s in your apartment with no part of his mouth on you, you scurry over to the oven to begin preheating it, urgently in need of something to do with your hands.
“Where’s ‘Stor?” Eren ambles along behind you, seemingly far more at ease than you judging by the way he slouches against the counter.
“Ymir’s parents have them come up that way every year.”
“You didn’t want to go?”
“It’s their thing.” You try to disguise the sudden tightness in your voice with a tinny note of disbelief, as if Eren should have inherently known that you elected this lonely Christmas celebration. “Hand me a baking sheet?”
“Where?”
“Down there.”
Your intonation must have carried the desired effect because Eren doesn’t press the matter further, following your instructions and producing a rectangular pan from one of the lower cabinets of your kitchen. You work wordlessly and in tandem with one another. Eren produces two wine glasses when he sees you scrounging around in the drawer for a corkscrew; he begins to scoop healthy dollops of cookie dough from the package with the spoon you hand him as you pour two not-so-healthy glasses of wine for you both. The silence is interrupted by Eren’s poorly-muffled snickers when he watches you take your first sip of wine.
“What?”
“Am I that bad?” Eren directs a playful, but meaningful, glance at your wine glass, a fourth of which you’ve just knocked back in one sip. You feel your cheeks warming, and you stick your tongue out at him.
“Has nothing to do with you. Just…thirsty.”
"Is it awkward? Me being here?"
"I invited you," you say, not quite wanting to acknowledge that, yes, being around him fully-clothed is a little strange. It isn't an unwelcome strangeness, but you're not about to let that little confession fly either.
“We used to be friends,” Eren muses quietly, uncharacteristically outspoken. That makes your eyes widen; you almost wonder if he’s spoken without meaning to.
“We’re still friends,” you murmur against the rim of your glass, taking another large swig. Eren shrugs, very focused on portioning out the cookie dough. “We are.”
“I know.” Something about his voice shatters you, makes your fingers grip around your glass tight enough to break. You can almost see the self-provided rejection flitting across his face; it’s quick, but it’s cold enough to feel.
“Eren–”
“Friends.” Eren’s eyes flit over towards you in a gesture of laying arms down, and his lips tighten in a smile that threatens you to challenge the tentative peace he’s building between you both. The word stings when it hits you, bittersweet and ironic. Another fourth of your wine disappears in a single sip, and you smile back in a way that you hope looks more kind than it feels disparaged.
The cookies are baked, the necessary seating arrangements are settled upon, the glasses are refilled, and soon you’re snuggled up on the right side of your couch, feet stretched into Eren’s lap, practically dozing off to a Christmas romcom. Eren is, surprisingly, enthralled, intensely focused on the television and leaning forward in a way that’s bending your ankles uncomfortably but is too adorable to tell him to stop.
“So he’s not going to chase her?” Eren turns to you, devastated and frowning a bit. You snort into your second glass, finding his furrowed brow and flushed cheeks funnier than the mayhem that’s been building on the screen for the last hour.
“You have to watch!” You kick him meaningfully.
Eren receives your kick like a child, groaning dramatically and shooting you a look cold enough to kill. He throws himself back into the couch, absentmindedly taking one of your sock-covered feet in his massive hands and kneading his thumbs into the arch of your foot. He presses into a particularly tender spot, working a soft groan of appreciation from you; Eren’s lips tighten, and he subtly moves your heels a little further away from his crotch, but he doesn’t stop his ministrations. He rubs firm circles into the sides of your ankles, running a thumb up your leg to the back of your knee, beginning to extend his massage up your leg.
A breathy moan falls from your lips, and though he doesn’t turn to look at you, the corner of Eren’s mouth quirks up.
“Feel good?”
“Mhm,” you hum, eyes fluttering shut. You can hear the rustle of Eren’s hair against the couch as he nods, the movie now long faded away into your peripheral focus.
Just as you’re beginning to truly melt into yourself, scooching just the littlest bit towards Eren so he can start rubbing at your thighs, something glimmers into your consciousness. Eren’s your fuck buddy, he said it himself at the store. The gooey, soft emotion that’s welling in your chest, the thing that’s rendering you spineless and malleable that you don’t dare to name– it’s unseemly. The realization crashes over you like a bucket of ice water, raising goosebumps on the back of your neck and causing your eyes to fly open.
Something sickly and sour curls behind your ribs, darkening the contented little glow that had begun to grow there. You feel sick, you feel sixteen again, you feel like a lamb being fattened up for the slaughter. Eren’s not Prince Charming; he’s your fuck buddy, just like he said. You’d done a thorough job of establishing that dynamic, and you remember that as sweet as everything around you might taste, it’s artificial. He’s here for something.
Eren doesn’t notice the change in your demeanor, the stiffening in your muscles; not until you’re climbing into his lap, at least.
“What are you–”
You cut him off by slotting your lips against his, gripping into his shirt with such a fervor that the self-loathing behind it could be confused for mindless want. Eren hesitantly reciprocates, hands sliding down your waist and landing firmly at your hips, leaving a soft impression in the skin there. You rake your fingers through his hair, kissing him deeper and more frantically, bringing your hands down to tug at the hem of your sweatshirt–
“Hey.” Eren’s quiet voice against your lips freezes you where you are, fingers still twisted in the bottom of your shirt.
“What?”
“What’s all this?” Eren’s hand is against your cheek, brushing a strand of hair out of your eyes. It’s so gentle it nearly burns, scalds against the cold, callous arousal you’ve built up in yourself.
“I don’t understand.” Your voice is weak, all the fire you’ve contrived fizzling out as your words cross the barely-there gap between your mouth and Eren’s. Your hands fall into the space shared between your laps, fingers curling and uncurling to mask the tremble running through them. Your gaze stays fixed on them, monitoring for any visible signs of weakness, unable to glance up to meet Eren. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No,” Eren murmurs, forehead pressed unwaveringly against yours, “you didn’t do anything wrong.”
“I don’t understand.”
“It was nice,” Eren says, a little breathless and disbelieving, “it was nice before.”
“So don’t you want…this?”
“I mean, yes. I always want this,” Eren punctuates his statement with an airy chuckle, rubbing his hands up and down your sides, “but I don’t always need it.”
“I feel like I upset you.” You can’t stop the embarrassed frown from working its way onto your face amidst your confusion. This…this is what you and Eren do. Now that it’s been refused, you don’t know where to put your wandering hands, where to tuck the rush of needing to touch him.
“I’m not upset,” Eren says, still barely audible as he thumbs at your chin, “you made my shitty day a lot less shitty, actually.”
“Why was it shitty?”
“My dad.” Something dark and coarse has infused his voice now, rasping against the warm air between you. Despite the rough tone of his voice, Eren’s moving a hand up and down your back soothingly, tucking your head into the crook of his neck. It works– your body goes slack in his hold, slumping against his chest and nuzzling your nose into his shoulder. “Won’t bore you with the details.”
“Tell me.”
“You don’t want to–”
“I do.” You pull back from where he’s pinned you, bringing your forehead back to rest against his. “Even if I’m just your fuck buddy. You can talk to me.”
Eren sighs, heavy and resigned. Even with your vision blurred by how close you are to him, you can see a wry smile twisting the corner of his mouth. “You’re not my fuck buddy.”
“I know. Friends, right?” You hardly dare to breathe against him, heart thudding viciously in your throat to the point that you worry Eren might hear. It’s not a word that encompasses what you feel for him, the mess you’ve both created between yourselves, but it’s your scapegoat, your fallback. No matter how many times you catch his lingering glance as he leaves you in the morning, no matter how often you delve into a bottle of wine and hover your thumb over his contact, no matter how closely he haunts your every thought. Friends.
The hint of a smile disappears from his face. Eren shakes his head against yours, fingers ghosting along your thigh, up your arm until he lands his hand over yours, curls them together in a loose fist against his chest.
“No.” You aren’t sure that you’ve heard him correctly, how quietly he speaks.
“No?”
“No,” Eren confirms, tightening his grip around your hand, “we’re not friends.”
Your breath catches in your throat at the same time Eren’s eyes flit up to meet yours, doubling down on the little confession he’s breathed into you. You’re powerless to do anything under the weight of your fear, your relief, your confusion. It’s enough for now, the understanding that no, you’re not friends and maybe you’ve never been, hanging between you and making the air a little more palatable.
“Not friends.” A little nod from you draws a shaky exhale from Eren, an answering nod of his own, and it feels like you both have mutually agreed to set whatever’s been building, whatever’s too-hot-to-touch, to the side for the time being. It’s enough.
He holds you, and you let him, despite the growing ache in your hips, the restlessness of your feet as they fall asleep. Eren tells you about his father, the career path he’s still afraid to go down. You tell him about your mother, how the emotional distance between you always manages to somehow be greater than the geographical, how love is her number one priority except when it comes from you. Both of you listen in reverence as you map out your scars for each other, delving into what’s healed and skating carefully over the parts that are still tender.
The couple on-screen reunites with a zoom shot and a dramatic kiss in the Christmas snow. The soaring orchestral number that accompanies their reunification is one that’s just loud enough to cover the sound of you and Eren’s hearts beating in tandem, and the clatter of his phone vibrating repeatedly on the kitchen counter.
#much ado about nothing#much ado#much ado uni#much ado universe#much ado verse#eren jaeger#eren yeager#eren jaeger fanfic#eren jaeger x reader#eren x reader#eren jaeger x you#eren yeager x reader#eren yeager x you
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Ghost Stories meme
"Your mother’s dead? I’m so sorry… My mom’s alive, but I wish she weren’t."
"He’s crying... and the only thing I can think to do is punch him!"
"Oh look, it’s a talking cat. And I’m not even high yet."
"If you can’t beat ‘em, cry and blame your parents!"
"The power of Christ compels you... or whatever."
"I see dead people. And by dead people, I mean idiots."
"Your mother is a drunk. Your dad’s in prison. You have no friends."
"I’m gonna go home, take a long shower, and try to forget I ever met you."
"You’re such a disappointment that even your imaginary friends left you."
"I swear, if I die because of you, I’m going to haunt you forever!"
"Hey, don’t say ‘lazy.’ I prefer the term ‘selectively active.’"
"You think I wanted to end up ghost hunting? I had plans!"
"I didn’t sign up for ghost-hunting. I signed up for ‘sit quietly and hope nothing happens.’"
"God, please give me patience, because if you give me strength, I’m going to need bail money."
"Why don’t we just ask the ghost politely to stop haunting us? That always works."
"Oh great, another demon. Just what my crippling anxiety needed."
"We’re not lost. We’re just… geographically challenged."
"Is it too late to transfer to a school without demons?"
"Can we skip the part where we split up and get killed?"
"If sarcasm were a weapon, I’d be invincible!"
"I don’t have time for ghosts. I’m too busy failing at life."
"You had one job: don’t touch the cursed object. And what did you do? You touched the cursed object!"
"This is the worst thing since I tried to microwave a fork!"
"I’m not saying I’m scared, but my soul just left my body for a minute."
"Why is it always me who has to deal with the creepy stuff? I’m not even getting paid!"
"I didn’t believe in ghosts before. I still don’t. I just believe in bad luck."
"My life was bad enough before ghosts started trying to kill me."
"I’m too pretty to die in a haunted school!"
"You know, for a ghost, you’re kind of a pain in the ass!"
"Oh, come on! Even the ghosts are judging me!"
"I’d run, but I’m emotionally and physically unavailable for that."
"What’s your name, kid? ‘Annoying’?"
"Trust me, the ghosts are just as confused as we are."
"I can’t believe I’m being chased by a damn ghost... on a school night!"
"We’re not doomed. We’re just... heavily inconvenienced."
"Well, if we’re going to die, let’s at least do it with style."
"I’m too young to die... and way too sarcastic!"
"Remember when our biggest problem was homework? Good times."
"My survival strategy? Denial and snacks."
"I didn’t know ghosts had Wi-Fi. Are they haunting me and my data plan?"
"This isn’t a haunting; it’s a cry for attention from beyond the grave."
"I’ve seen bad ideas before, but this one deserves an award."
"I’m not crying. I’m just leaking disappointment."
"Congratulations, you’re now officially dumber than a haunted brick."
"We’re not lost. We’re on an adventure... a terrible, horrible adventure."
"I don’t want to alarm you, but we’re in a haunted building with no exit plan and no common sense."
"Ghosts, please. I’m tired. Just haunt me later."
"Oh great. Now the ghost has an attitude problem."
"If this ghost doesn’t kill me, embarrassment will."
"I’m too tired to be scared. Can we schedule the haunting for tomorrow?"
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Contracts or Biddability (part 1 of 2)
cw: Pg13, innuendos and vulgar language, and so much cringe, some pop culture references too.
“The end.” The cryo abyss herald closed the book.
“That was a really sad story.” You said as your eyes glazed over. The Abyss order had kidnapped you and held you captive for a while now. You weren’t sure how long you’ve been down here but the food was good enough and they’d borrow enough books from the surface to keep you entertained.
“I’m sorry. We weren’t been able to borrow anything else because of the security around the Favonius library.”
“Well, you could just let me go and I can find something on my own.”
“No! We need you here to further our plans!” He panicked.
“What plans? What happened to Dvalin? What’s the deal with Andrius?”
“Just calm down my liege. All will be revealed in time.” He patted your head and walked away.
“I want to go home.” You curled up in a ball.

“Aaaaahh!” Someone yelled. That ear piercing scream roused you from your sleep.
‘Should I shout for someone?’ You thought. ‘What if somebody broke in? But if it’s a fire and they don’t know that I’m still here…’
“Help! Help me please! I don’t care who! I just want to see the Sun again!”
The door squeaked open and you thought that maybe your pleas would be recognized, until you saw that the man who walked in was a Pyroslinger Bracer. “Why is the Fatui here?” You whispered meekly.
He raised his rifle towards you head. “Wait, please! Don’t kill me! I wanna live, wanna live!” He shot, but the bullet bounced off of your skull and fell on the ground. “Well… that was anticlimactic.”
He shot you again 3 more time. “Ow! That hurts, dickhead!”
“How are you alive?”
“Hehe. We’re immortal Buffy we can do anything. Oh yeah? Clap.”
“My name’s Vincent.”
“Oh for shucks sakes.” You roll your eyes.
“I’m sure the Doctor will be very interested in you. For now I’ll take you back to Childe though.”
“Ew! Dottore needs to back the F up before he gets smacked the F up for what he did to Collei.” Vincent bound you hands, then grabbed your arm and pushed you through the Abyss. “Hey real quick for my internal monologue I need to know what pronouns you use. My names Gen with a G apparently. I’m gender fluid and I go by they/them.”
“…uh, Vincent Powers and I’m a man.”
“So… he and him?”
“Yes? I’m so confused why you’re confused.”
“Well, I didn’t want to assume.”
He brought you back to the surface and it felt wonderful. Then he placed you in the back of a cart and you two and the rest of his squad set sail for Liyue.

It’s been maybe two hours since the Fatui captured you and you’re finally at Liyue Harbor. They’ve taken you to the Northland Bank to meet Tartaglia. Vincent threw you onto the ground at Childe’s feet.
“What the Abyss is that thing?” His presence is all consuming.
“That “thing” said that they’re name is Gen with a G.”
You look up and see the red head eying you up with disgust. You return the glare and proclaimed, “I finally get to meet my rival. I swear to you, I’m going to seduce Zhongli and get his cock!”
“Excuse me?” He looks at you even colder than before.
“You heard me! I’m willing to take him up my ass if he’s gay.”
“You are vulgar and repulsive.” He pressed his water blade things against my throat and sliced across it. You fell back onto your butt at the pressure.
“Ow. Yeah, um—Mr. Tartar sauce—that’s not going to work. I’m kinda immortal, somehow.”
“How dare you insult me! Do you know who I am!?” He grabbed you by the top of your head to look him in his eyes.
“Honestly if you look at me like that more often I’d let you have a piece of my ass any day. I just assumed that you were a bottom but I’ll let you creampie me if you become my sugar daddy.” His face burst into crimson. He threw me onto the ground and stomped on my throat. “This is turning me on.”
“Get this thing out of my sight.”
“Hey I’m a person! I have feelings you know!”
“But what about Dottore? Wouldn’t he like to examine them?”
“Dottore will have both of our heads if we bring him this thing.”
“I’m not an object, I’m a person! You see, this is why Zhongli will never love you.
“You know what? Since you’re so obsessed with Mr. Zhongli, why don’t I just send you to him?”
“You’d do that for me?!” You shouted excitedly.
“Sure. If it get’s you to leave me alone.”
“But Childe, they’re immortal. You don’t come across something like that every day.”
“Hey can I have a delusions? I don’t have power over the elements but I don’t think I can die so a delusion shouldn’t be a problem for me.”
“Fine!” He threw a delusion connected to a chain at you. “NOW GET OUT! TAKE THEM TO SEE ZHONGLI IF THEY WANTS TO SO BADLY!!”
“Hey! This one’s broken!” You yelled at him as you were being dragged away.
“You never specified if you wanted a working one or not!” He smirked back at you.

Ugh this sucks! You still have nothing to defend yourself with! You can at least tie the stupid thing around your wrist.
“Mr. Zhongli? Is Mr. Zhongli here?” You asked someone at the Funeral Parlor.
“Hm? Did someone call for me? I was just about to head out.”
“Hello Mr. Zhongli. I’m Gen Z, spelt with a G.” You extended you hand to shake his.
“Hello Gen.” He took your hand and shook it. ‘His hands are so big.’ You thought. ‘Heheh, dirty mind dirty mind dir-dir-dir-dir- dirty mind!’
“Excuse me. Why is your bracelet glowing?” He asked. You look down and see that your delusion has started to glow yellow. “Huh?”
‘Have I resonated with geo?’
#sagau#sagau genshin#sagau x reader#genshin sagau#genshin impact sagau#sagau cult au#genshin impact#genshin impact x reader#self aware genshin#tartaglia#childe#childe tartaglia ajax#genshin#zhongli#tartaglia x reader#tartaglia x y/n#tartaglia x you#tartaglia genshin impact#zhongli genshin impact#zhongli x reader#genshin zhongli x reader#zhongli x you#zhongli x childe#genshin impact zhongli#liyue#geo#ajax x reader#childe x reader#genshin crack
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Clone wars headcanons about Anakin and Ahsoka being siblings
When Anakin pisses Ahsoka off she’ll hunt Obi-Wan down and say something along the lines of “I’m gonna kill your son” the first time this happened it shocked Obi-Wan into silence but it didn’t take long for him to put 2 and 2 together
Not long after Anakin starts copying Ashoka’s little comment but his are more creative so it’s something along the lines of “Imma throw your daughter out the airlock” he mostly does this because it pisses Ahsoka off when he mimics her but it’s also weirdly therapeutic
Poor Obi-Wan has to deal with both of them ranting at him so it’s pretty common for him to hear the same story twice in one day
On a couple of rare occasions one of the two enters his room to complain just to find the other doing the same thing which usually results in a new fight because “how dare you come in here to do the same thing I’m doing”
Those fights usually end with Obi-Wan kicking them out to handle their shit he’s usually willing to hear out both of their sides and problem solve but not when they’re fighting just to fight (which happens sometimes)
Anakin formed this little tik that makes him laugh and confuses the general public and that tik is whenever someone close to him asks him to do something he’ll say no and do it anyway
He only really does this with Rex and Ahsoka (more so Ahsoka) he respects the rest of them too much at first the duo was confused by it but after a while they just took it as a yes and moved on with it
It usually looked something like this “General your padawan is being stubborn please go check on her” “No” and then Rex would nod or give a small thanks and then move on
Or “Hey skyguy can we please get ice cream when we’re done with this mission” “No” “Thanks master!!”
The first time Obi-Wan saw this happen he was flabbergasted and called Anakin rude which made the duo take a step back because they were so used to it
Ahoksa spoke up first asking “What do you mean master?” and when Obi-Wan clarified that rejecting her so abruptly could rightfully be seen as rude the duo shot him confused looks
Anakin tries to clear it up by saying “What are you talking about I said we could get some” and when Obi-Wan again points out that he told her no Anakin responds with something that makes Obi-Wan want to tear his hair out “but she knows I’m saying yes don’t you snips” to which Ashoka agrees
Obi-Wan walked away muttering about padawans giving him gray hairs and putting him in an early grave
Ahsoka doesn’t know when she started keeping a mental list of the most embarrassing things the boys have done but it becomes a great source of entertainment for her
Sometimes when Anakin is getting a little too cocky with Padme she’ll say “Hey master remember when you” and the next thing she knows she’s there’s a hand over her mouth and she’s being dragged away
Sometimes when Rex is taunting her a little too much about how “you almost beat me that time squirt maybe the next time or the next or the next” she’ll respond with “do you think the boys wanna know about that time we were walking to the speeder and” and he shuts up fast as hell
She’s never had to do this to Obi-Wan but Anakin asked her if she remembers any of his embarrassing moments and all she does is nod the 212 swears they’ve never seen their general go as pale as he did that day
On the rare occasions that Anakin or Ahsoka want to watch something different than the other it usually results in a lot of bickering a lot of “I’m your master and you will listen to me” and “that doesn’t apply here” thrown out
But Anakin’s favorite thing to throw in Ahsoka’s face is “I was here first” even if he wasn’t and when she points that out he’ll respond with “I meant alive first”
Sometimes Ahsoka will respond with “I was here first” which results in two paths 1. Being her reminding him she was at the temple before him or 2. Her saying she was born first
The first response usually ends her in a headlock and the second gets a response that people can hear from outside the temple and that’s Anakin yelling at the top of his lungs “That makes no kriffing sense!!”
This is me projecting a little bit but I think Ahsoka swears like a damn sailor it’s bad enough to catch Anakin off guard and he’s barely better than her bro can and will curse in multiple languages but force forbid Ahsoka says kriff
She’s startled a few “language!” Or “hey”s out of him which shocks both of them more than it should Ahsoka is more startled by the hypocrisy and Anakin is startled because “Oh kriff I’m turning into Obi-Wan”
The funny thing is a lot of people including Obi-Wan blame Anakin for her cussing problem and a few masters even suggest some less than-up-to-code options to fix the problem which causes Anakin to become a little protective
On nights when Anakin and Ahsoka can’t sleep and sitting in the temple feels like a death sentence they silently go to Anakin’s favorite speeder and just drive
Sometimes they have somewhere specific in mind but most of the time they drive with no destination in mind sometimes they pick up Rex or Obi-Wan but most nights it’s just the two of them
Sometimes they talk about life and sometimes they sit in complete silence just enjoying each other's company and the shitty music on the radio
The only consistent thing about these trips is they don't go back until both of their eyes are drooping and Anakin can’t safely drive anymore
They never talk about these little excursions unless they’re already on one honestly they don’t even have to ask most times they’ll just walk into each other's rooms share a look and then walk out
And there's something weirdly comforting about that routine
#star wars#the clone wars#star wars clone wars#star wars headcanons#anakin skywalker#ahsoka tano#obi wan kenobi#padmé amidala#captain rex#snips and skyguy#disaster siblings#they make me mentally ill#these are all based on me and my sister#were a weird little bunch#the original disaster siblings#they fight like cats and dogs and then call each other their best friends#cause thats what siblings do#I have a lot of au's rotting in my brain#but I don't know if I will write them#ones a soul eater au#that actually makes me really mentally ill
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Back at My Place
Wake Up, Chapter 4
Series Masterlist Next Chapter
pairing: Matt Murdock x fem!reader
summary: In an attempt to stop the advances of an unwanted suitor, Matt Murdock accidentally condemns you to being his fake girlfriend.
warnings: crazy sweet fluff, swearing, a bit of angst at the very end
a/n: I had such a fun time with this chapter. I also realized that I have a very hard time not making Matt angsty. He’s just so self deprecating, it’s easy pickings. Anyway, I hope that you enjoy! Please comment, like, reblog, and request (you’ll seriously make my day. I love hearing what you all think.)
w/c: 3.6k
A breeze blew across a patch of exposed skin on your collar bone, making you shiver yourself awake. Opening your eyes, your surroundings confused you for a minute before you remembered that you’d been at Matt’s last night. But, the last thing you recalled was sitting with him on the couch, listening to Matt as he recounted stories from his childhood. Which mostly meant giggling at the fact that Matt has apparently always had a martyr complex.
You must have dozed off because you were now wrapped in silk sheets in a bed that smelled like him. Had he carried you here? The thought of Matt picking you up and tucking you into his bed made warmth bloom in your stomach. You bit back a moan picturing his arms caring for you so lovingly. Sinking deeper into the pillow under your head, you inhaled deeply, smiling as you thought about laying there all day just breathing him in.
The sound of voices outside the closed door shook you out of your fantasy.
Pushing yourself up, you scrubbed a hand over your face before making your way out to the living room.

Foggy was having a good morning. Marci had been up before him, miraculously, and had coffee ready for him when he woke. His favorite bakery hadn’t run out of everything bagels when he got there, which was practically unheard of on a Sunday morning. And now, he was making his way over to Matt’s to get proof of life. Which was only slightly dampening his good mood.
He’d be less worried if the asshole had picked up his call this morning. Foggy and Marci had tried to get ahold of him, to see if you and Matt were alright after the gala, but he didn’t answer. Marci had called you a few times with similar success. So, Foggy had volunteered to go in person.
Knocking less than politely on Matt’s door, Foggy nearly fell into the other man as the door flew open.
“Fuck, Foggy, it’s not even 9. You want to wake the whole floor up?”
“Thank the Lord, Saint Matthew lives another day. If you don’t want me breaking down your door this early, answer your fucking phone next time.” Foggy plastered on a smile, voice laced with false positivity. Barging past his friend into the apartment, he spun around, arms wide.
“Well, I’m glad you’re alive, my friend. I was having a nice morning and finding you half-dead in your Devil gear really would’ve ruined that.”
“Foggy—“ Matt’s voice was low in warning, but Foggy ignored him.
“Anyway, what happened last night? You never let us know if you two were ok.”
“We’re fine. Snyder was being a bitch and it sent my fake girlfriend into a panic attack. Now, I’m sure you have a wonderful day with Marci to get back to and I have to get dressed for church.”
“HA! You think you can bullshit me, Murdock. Only a freshman in Matt-ology would believe that you attend regular Sunday mass. You prefer to go at night and speak directly to the clergy. What are you hiding in here?” Foggy set down his bagel, peering around corners as if expecting there to be a surprise hidden.
“I’m not hiding anything, I just wasn’t expecting you.” Matt’s voice was hushed as he tried to herd Foggy out the door.
“Am I not allowed to drop by anymore? What is going on with you?”
Before Matt could respond, his bedroom door opened to reveal your startled face, which sat above an outfit picked entirely from Matt’s wardrobe, Foggy noticed.
A shit-eating grin broke out over Foggy’s face as he said your name. “Funny seeing you here.”
You grimaced, “Hi, Foggy.”
Matt made his way over to you. “Did we wake you up? I was trying to tell Foggy to be quiet.”
“No, no!” You jumped in reassuringly. “I was already awake. And I’m—I’m sorry for falling asleep last night, I didn’t mean to crash here.”
“Don’t apologize. I’m sure you were tired.” Matt ran a hand over your arm before pulling you into a hug. Clearly, they had forgotten that there was a captive audience.
Foggy cleared his throat. “So…you slept here?”
The two of you jumped apart. Matt stepped in front of you, “It’s not like that, Fog. I gave her my bed and slept on the couch.”
“Hey, don’t need to explain anything to me. Anyway, glad to know you’re both alive. I, um, have a…thing.” Hurrying out of the apartment, Foggy rushed home to Marci. Their plot to unite two of their favorite people was actually coming together, despite the wrench Matt had thrown into the plans by nominating you as his fake partner.

About a month after the gala, Foggy was seriously wondering if he’d been left out of the loop on Matt’s relationship status. You and Matt were hanging out more than ever and yet didn’t admit that you weren’t pretend-dating anymore. He supposed he would need to see evidence a bit more damning than Matt comforting a friend after a tough night or spending more time with them one-on-one, but he had his suspicions.
Sitting in his apartment, mulling through paperwork as quickly as he could, he couldn’t help but let his mind wander to the events of that morning.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・
Matt had been tucked away in his office when he arrived. Foggy didn’t plan on staying for long, since he had intended to work from home that day, but he needed to grab some files that were relevant to the case he was working on.
Eventually, Foggy heard a door open, and—assuming that Matt was leaving his office to finally greet him—he ran out into the central room.
“Hey, Matt, I know I said I wouldn’t be in today, I just needed to grab the Anderson files.” Foggy spoke as he walked out of his own office. But, as he looked up, he realized that Matt was still in the other room. Instead, you stood before him, holding a brown paper bag and looking like he’d caught you breaking and entering.
“Hey Foggy! I didn’t expect you to be here. Is Matt in…” you trailed off with a vague gesture. As you pointed to Matt’s office, his door opened, revealing the blind lawyer who faced you curiously.
“Hey, I thought I heard you. What are you doing here?” Ignoring Foggy completely—the blond looking after him incredulously—he marched over to you, a crooked grin on his lips.
“Well, I…um—“ You stuttered, very much unable to ignore Foggy at this moment. “Remember that bakery I told you about? The one that just opened up by the Pilates studio?”
Matt nodded and you continued. “I told you that I thought you’d like their almond croissants and, I don’t know, you mentioned that you had a bad night so I thought I’d bring you one to cheer you up.” You scuffed your shoes on the floor, no longer looking at Matt.
“That’s so sweet of you.” Matt spoke, smiling at you softly. He was a bit shocked, but more than touched by the gesture.
“And I’m really sorry, Foggy! I would’ve gotten you one but, when we chatted last night, Matt mentioned you wouldn’t be in today so I—“
“Hey, no problem! I have to run home anyway. Have a good day, my little lovebirds!” Foggy brushed off your concern. You squeaked, embarrassed at his comment. Foggy waved goodbye, and headed off, hearing Matt ask you if you wanted to split the pastry as he went.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
Shaking his head at the memory, Foggy really hoped you two would come to your senses soon.

A couple weeks after the croissant incident, Foggy found himself in desperate need of a break.
“Matt, hurry up! Karen and I are thirsty!” Foggy rolled his eyes to the blonde as they waited for Matt to quit burning the midnight oil and go out with them. It was Friday, and they had just had a major breakthrough in their current case that had seemed unwinnable for weeks.
“Alright, alright! I’m coming.” Matt shook his head fondly at his partners, grabbing his coat and cane.
“Josie’s?” Karen questioned.
Foggy snorted. “Do we ever go anywhere else?” He sent a text to you and Marci, letting you both know that you were invited to celebrate with them, though he did not expect Marci to take him up on that offer.
“Why would we?” Matt grinned, taking Foggy’s arm as the three made their way to the dive bar they frequented.
Arriving at Josie’s in record time, Karen offered to buy the first round while the guys grabbed a table.
Foggy inhaled deeply. “Smell that, Murdock?”
“Stale beer and vomit?”
“No! The smell of our impending success!”
“It doesn’t trouble you that your brain associates our success with vomit?”
“Gah! You’re impossible!” Foggy threw his hands up as Matt smirked.
“What did he do now?” Foggy cheered as he saw you approaching them.
“You’ve gotta help me out. Your boyfriend is refusing to admit that we are going to win our case this week.” Foggy mock glared at Matt.
You sat down next to Matt, laughing brightly as he began to argue. “I never said that! I said, it’s weird that you link our winning a case with such an unpleasant sensation.”
“Oh god, we just got here and they’re already going at it.” Karen murmured to you as she returned with drinks, chuckling with fond exasperation. She handed you a beer and you accepted gratefully as you slid under the arm Matt moved around your shoulders. As you nestled into his side, he and Foggy continued to bicker about what winning should smell like.
Eventually, Karen broke in and offered them their beers. Mostly for a moment of quiet, you assumed. Taking a drink, Matt turned to you. “How was your day, angel?” Karen and Foggy looked at each other, ‘Angel??’
“It was awesome, actually! My boss approved my proposal!” You sounded thrilled.
“That’s fantastic!” Matt was beaming at you. “Did you get to show her the mock ups?”
“I’m sorry,” Foggy cut in with a smile. “What proposal?”
“Shit, I forgot I hadn’t told you and Karen! I’m sorry guys.” You grimaced sheepishly. “I had been noticing some recurring names when I sat in court this month so I did some digging and found 4 property managers that have dozens of documented issues. I’m talking constructive eviction, unhabitable units, actions in contempt, a whole mess of stuff. So I wanted to ask my boss if we could set up some clinics in the area for hearing counterclaim filing and to help people file a case against their landlord preemptively.”
Matt’s focus was entirely on you as you spoke animatedly, absolutely ecstatic about your new project.
“I had a solid framework but I was having a really hard time working up the nerve to ask her if I could do anything. Thankfully, Matt had some great ideas and helped me put together a whole presentation at dinner last week!” You grinned, looking up at him.
“What dinner last week?” Karen inquired, her eyes flirting between the two of you as she barely concealed her knowing grin.
“Oh!” You shifted in your seat slightly. “Well, we’ve been having dinner once or twice a week to—um—“
“Get to know each other!” Matt suggested, helpfully.
“Exactly! In case we have another event and have to speak to people about each other, or whatever.”
“Right,” Foggy confirmed, eyebrows raised. “Well, I’m glad that it went well! And, that you’ve been getting this workaholic out of the office. I was wondering why he’s been so chipper lately.”
“Oh, I’m sure that has more to do with this ‘impending success’ I keep hearing about.” You bit your lip, fidgeting with the half empty glass in your hand.
“It’s not all work-related, sweetness.” Matt nudged you, grinning.
You smiled into your beer, draining the rest of it. “Sure, Murdock. Though, I’m afraid you’ll have to try harder to sweet talk me into buying you another drink.”
“Hmm, guess I’ll keep trying.” Matt followed you out of the booth, taking your arm as you both walked up to ask Josie for a refill.
Karen gaped at Foggy. “You weren’t kidding!”
“I know!” Foggy said, throwing his arms towards the bar after their friends. “They don’t see it!”
Karen snorted. “We are in for a world of hurt.”
After the group had chatted for a bit, Foggy suggested that you and Matt play him and Karen in pool, to “settle the smell of success debate once and for all”. Everyone seemed excited about the proposition, but you hesitated.
“I’ve never actually played pool before.” You admitted to Matt, quietly, as Karen and Foggy got the table set up.
“That’s alright, pretty girl. I’ll just have to teach you.” He flicked your chin softly before raising his voice. “I promise it’s not that difficult to beat Foggy. I could do it with my eyes closed.” He jested, making you laugh.
“How dare you insult my honor in front of this fair maiden!” Foggy crowed, feigning chest pain. “I’m hurt, truly hurt!”
You giggled at their antics, sliding out from the booth and pulling Matt with you. “Better teach me fast, Matty. I have a feeling Nelson won’t be taking it easy on me.”
While Foggy and Karen were having a good time battling you two in pool, it was becoming almost irritating to watch the two of you flirt and exchange soft touches without acknowledging the authenticity of your relationship. Matt kept holding your waist to help you position the pool cue, giving you a kiss on the cheek when any of the balls landed in a pocket. And, as the two of you became more tipsy throughout the evening, you started sitting atop of Matt’s lap, playing with his hair and resting your nose against his cheek, while waiting for Foggy or Karen to finish a turn.
It was adorable, sure, but aggravating nonetheless because anytime someone questioned it, you and Matt brushed it off as ‘keeping up appearances’.
As you lined up your cue to take the final shot, Matt announced your intentions for you. “8 ball, far right corner pocket.” Giving the cue ball a firm tap, the 8 ball sailed into its intended receptacle.
You and Matt cheered as Foggy and Karen yelled in frustration. As you gave him a hug, Matt twirled you around.
“Great job, angel. I’m so proud of you!” He pressed a kiss to your hairline. You leaned into him, treasuring the moment.
Foggy and Karen just shared a look, shaking their heads, before Foggy asked “Anyone up for a rematch?”

Foggy, Karen, and Matt were tiredly running over their case notes for the upcoming Jones trial. Their last few cases had all gone well, but this case was incredibly taxing. They were having a hard time getting their two key witnesses to cooperate, and the judge had denied their request for a continuance which squished the timeline in a less than optimal direction.
Sighing, Foggy rubbed at his eyes. “Is there anyway we could get the sister on the stand? She was so much easier to work with.”
“There’s no way we’d be able to prepare her in time.” Matt grumped, tension headache steadily brewing.
Karen closed her laptop with a frustrated sigh. “Alright gentlemen, I don’t know about you but I will be absolutely useless if I keep working at this without food. Dinner?”
“Yah let’s go grab a pizza and give our poor minds a break.” Foggy rubbed Matt’s shoulder, hoping the idea of food would be enough to tempt him away from his computer.
“You two go ahead, I’ll see if I can find a weakness in the opposing argument here.”
“Matt, c’mon—“ Foggy pleaded.
“It’s fine. I’m on the verge of a breakthrough, I can feel it…” Matt turned back to his computer, putting headphones in his ears before hearing his friends’ responses.
Foggy simply gave Karen an exaggerated eye roll before the two headed out to grab dinner.
The pizza place wasn’t too far from their office, so they fully expected Matt to be honed in on his case notes when they returned, but instead he was leaning against the table in the conference room. His phone held against his ear, Matt had a small grin on his face as he listened to the person on the other end of the line. It must have been you. No one else could break Matt’s intense focus so easily.
Foggy and Karen were as quiet as possible as they brought the food into the conference room. Matt’s grin fell a bit as they entered.
“Ok sweetness, Nelson and Page are back with food so I have to go. Call me when you get home safe tonight…yah I know you will. Love you.” Matt ended the call, placing his phone on the table.
“I found a clerical error in the original filing of the case. Should help us at least weaken the validity of the prosecution's claims.” It was dead silent for a moment before Matt prompted “Are we going to eat or have we taken those pizzas hostage?”
Foggy pried his jaw from the floor, looking to Karen who appeared equally shocked. “No, uh, we can eat. Yah, let’s eat.” Foggy set the boxes down as Karen rummaged around for some plates. She gave him a pointed look, her eyes swiveling between him and Matt.
Internally debating whether to ask Matt about the terminology used at the end of his phone call, Foggy opened his mouth but Matt held up a hand. “Before you even start, she was out with friends at a bar. We both agreed to act like a couple when in public and she explicitly told me she was ok with it.” The blind man turned to his work with a barely noticeable glower, clearly exasperated by his friends’ questioning.
“See, buddy, that’s cool and all, but you do see how this looks right?” Foggy nervously took a bite of pizza, eyeing the other man.
“What, like I’m forcing her to say things she’s uncomfortable with? That I’m holding her back from finding someone she actually wants to be with? Yes, Foggy, I’m aware.” Matt’s scowl deepened. “I beat myself up about it constantly. I really don’t need you both breathing down my neck about it too.”
“Wait, Matt, you think that’s what we’ve been talking about?” Karen prompted, clearly as taken aback as Foggy felt. She placed a hand on Matt’s arm in a gesture of comfort. “We’re not worried that you’re making her uncomfortable.”
“And we certainly aren’t worried that you’re holding her back!” Foggy added. “Why on earth would you think we were worried about that?”
“Clearly you are! That morning after the gala when you rushed out after seeing she was still there, you were biting your tongue the whole time, Fog!” Matt ran his hands through his hair in distress. “It’s like everytime one of you sees us together, you’re always pointing out the illegitimacy of our relationship or calling us a name. Not to mention, the night at Josie’s where you and Karen were frustratedly saying I was causing a ‘world of hurt’?” Fully pacing now, Foggy had to stand to stop the other man from wearing a tread in their carpet.
“Matt, that’s not what we’ve been trying to say.” Foggy broke in, slowly.
A muscle in Matt’s jaw twitched. “Really, because everytime she gets nervous around me, we suddenly end up alone. If you couldn’t bear to watch what I was doing, you at least could’ve told me that you thought I was hurting her if it was so hard to watch.” He turned away, biting his bottom lip in irritation.
“What we meant when we said those things,” Karen jumped in, also coming to stand in front of Matt. “Was that it seems like the two of you aren’t fake dating anymore. It seems like you’re actually dating and you don’t realize it. And, you aren’t making her uncomfortable, Matt. She adores you.”
Matt’s nostrils flared as conflicting emotions danced across his face. “Matt, buddy, all this time you’ve been chastising yourself for holding her back? Have you stopped to consider that she might enjoy being with you?” Foggy reached out to squeeze his friend’s shoulder, but the other man pulled out of his grasp, pacing again.
“Enjoy being with me? That’s fucking rich.” He bit out. “She’s so smart and funny and thoughtful and—“ his voice was breaking now. “All I’ve done since I brought her into this was get her hurt. She’s way too good to be stuck with me.”
Snatching his red glasses, cane, and computer, Matt huffed before throwing a few sheets of paper down on the table. “Here’s the court's error for the Jones case. I need some air. I’ll see you both tomorrow.” Matt stomped out the door, Foggy and Karen guiltily watching him go.
“Ok, we may have done some damage here.” Foggy grimaced.
“How did we not realize that their own doubts are shaping their interpretation of this?” Karen groaned.
“It’s an embarrassing oversight, I’ll admit.” Rubbing at the back of his neck, Foggy turned to her. “The question is now, do we go after him?”
“No. He needs to work it out on his own.” Karen stared back at her friend glumly.
“Ugh. You’re probably right.”
End Notes: A huge thanks to @acewritesfics and @samspenandsword for sharing the beautiful post dividers!
Tag List: @maladaptivedaydreamingbum @scoliobean @harperdoodle @mattkinsella @leikelle
#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x you#human disaster matt murdock#daredevil#matt murdock#marvel#marvel's daredevil#mcu daredevil#daredevil fic#charlie cox#foggy nelson#karen page#my writing#mm#wake up
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SILVER UNDERGROUND / deleted scene 02.
the first face i saw. :: an alternate version, aka the first draft, of that forest moment in chapter nine.
welcome to my segment of deleted scenes, levi's pov, and alternative 'almosts' that didn't quite make the published cut. this scene was the very first thing i wrote for this story! this is the earliest know blurb of SU. originally it was quite abrupt, and i much prefer the buildup that ended up happening in the story. may this be a lesson to writers: write the dang thing, don't agonize about a perfect scene, because when you go back to edit the epiphany of how you really want the scene to go will just come naturally! this is unedited. 1.2K words / explicit language, fighting. :: please remember: this is additional deleted content, not tied to the current canon of the story.
“I’m not going back.”
Levi is expressionless, but there is a hint of anger in his clipped question. “So you’re disobeying direct orders?”
“You didn’t order me, sir,” you reply. “You only suggested I go back. There’s a distinct difference.”
“Don’t be a smartass.”
Except the murmur is a thinly-veiled threat and nothing more. Somehow you’re confident enough about it that you take a few steps forward into the wide gap between you.
“You need the numbers,” you urge.
“No, shithead, what I need is for you to leave.”
“Why?”
“Disobeying orders and questioning your superior. Are you trying to rack up all possible offenses in one night?”
“I am trying to understand why you’re so adamant about giving the squad one less body in the lineup when we’ve already lost so many people—”
“Enough.”
“—and back-up would be at least a day away on horseback, which means we’re sitting ducks until we work together to get out of the forest with as many people alive as we—”
“I said enough, cadet,” Levi barks, and something ignites in you.
Something toxic that leads you to take another step forward, teeth bared.
“I’m not a fucking cadet, Levi, so stop pretending I don’t know what I’m talking about.”
The swear is not as surprising as hearing his first name on your tongue. If you didn’t know any better, then you would swear Levi is just as surprised. A tick of his brow is the giveaway: both move from their typical neutral position, and suddenly the air feels thick around you.
“Do you?” he challenges, low and dangerous as he mirrors your step forward. “Because last I checked, you were just some dumbass with a fucked up memory.”
The insult stings its intended target. You wince, but hold your ground.
“I was once on this squad, sir.”
“That doesn’t mean shit in the present.”
“It does to me,” you confess. Your voice raises to shout. “It matters that I fought! It matters that I’m here. I don’t know why you hate me so much—”
“I thought it would be obvious by now,” Levi flatly interrupts.
You trudge closer towards your captain, but he minds the gap for you: one step of his boot and he’s eye-to-eye with you, here, in the middle of this clearing.
The green flecks in the gray of his eyes bring some sickening softness to your belly, quelling a fraction of the fire within. It reminds you of summertime and darkness. A dichotomy of things you once loved — and things that once scared you.
Levi stares head on, seemingly disinterested in your shouting.
Yet when your eyes drop to his arm, you see the most obvious tell of all: his fist is pale, fingers gripped in a white-knuckle ball of restraint.
So you ask the first question that comes to mind:
“Then why do you want me to live so badly?”
By the sound of his breath hitching in his throat, it’s safe to assume your question has caught Humanity’s Strongest off guard. Painfully earnest, the words are woven in a confusion threatening to choke the life out of you. And Levi — Levi is four shades of enraged, glaring straight through you.
“I don’t give a shit if you live,” Levi corrects with a snarl.
“You don’t?”
“No.”
“Then allow me to stay.”
“No.”
Your chin tilts. “Then why—”
“Why do you want to die so fucking bad?” he snaps, his spit hitting your cheek. “Why bother waking up in that fucking rubble if all you wanted to do was throw away your second chance?”
His anger almost leaves you speechless.
Almost.
Except this feeling, this mindless fight, is the most familiar with the world as you’ve felt since waking up in that hospital. As if you like shouting, ready to throw fists.
As if you enjoy Levi yelling at you.
“Yours was the first face I saw when I woke up, sir,” you bite in response, forcing his jaw to clench. “I didn’t receive the recommendation for reinstatement out of thin fucking air. I went through modified training. I watched you visit the camps between missions. You didn’t have to check up on me, but you did.”
Levi’s mouth twitches.
“For someone who claims they don’t give a shit if I live you sure have a mighty big hand in the pot to ensure my safety, so what the fuck is the real reason behind ordering that I go back to the Walls?”
You manage to relay your monologue of grievances uninterrupted. Something dark brews behind Levi’s stormy eyes, stuck on your wide-eyed gaze.
“You’re insufferable, you know that?” he asks, low and steady, but there’s a glimmer of something else in his voice.
If it was anyone else, then it might have been something close to fondness, but it can’t be.
“Yeah?" you challenge. "Well, trying to keep up with your snarky ass, I couldn’t—”
You're pushed back by the sheer force of his lips.
His...
Your eyes open, then widen, at the sight of Levi Ackerman pressing a kiss to your mouth. Your body responds before you even understand why -- you drag him closer, hands buried in his hair, and respond in kind.
Everything feels too hot and too cold. Everything feels... good. You kiss back with such intensity that you feel his teeth.
Your world goes blank.
.
.
.
.
“What was that all about?” Petra’s voice comes out monotone, awaking you for a moment of dissociation.
Truthfully? You wish you had an answer.
You barely remember Levi telling you to go back to camp to rest.
You can't think of anything else except that:
The tingle of his lips pushed against yours lingers long after he’s departed.
There is a haze in your brain that takes over the fog of your amnesia, settling on a feeling beyond all else: warmth.
Even if you nearly went fist to fist with the Captain — a stupid, costly mistake — everything in your body is warm in the cool midnight air.
Maybe it was a mistake.
No, it was a mistake.
(One that the squad cannot know about, for both of your sakes.)
“We fought,” you provide just as flat.
“I know,” she says. “I heard. You used to do that a lot.”
You turn to study the glow of green on her back from her cloak.
“Argue to the brink of a fight,” she clarifies. “With Levi.”
When you say nothing, she cranes her chin over her shoulder. Although she doesn’t smile, her tone is melodic. Cheery, like there’s something funny between the lines.
“Before, you didn’t mind getting in his face if you two disagreed. I’ve never seen Levi get so angry. It’s a wonder he never punished you.”
So this was a common occurrence.
Did he always end it with a kiss?
Your warmth begins to fade as Petra’s words catch up to you, and you squeeze the fist at your side. “How much did you hear?”
“Don’t worry,” she assures, poking the dying embers with a stick. “I didn’t eavesdrop.”
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