#I’m putting him on artfight fuck it

[cameroneatsdirt]

new shitpost oc (?) just dropped

[loudclan-clangen]

(I thought of something funny)

Whenever Owlstar comes back to camp from solo walks, there's just this giant banner at the entrance reading "Welcome Back, Cheater."

Slitsplash swears they didn't put it up, but appreciates whoever did it.

Meanwhile, Fiercestripe is smirking in the background. (She did it)

They’re throwing him a party!

(˃̣̣̥▽˂̣̣̥) These asks all flow together so well I genuinely cannot tell if they are multiple people or just one person who is SO PISSED. Made my night to see these all come in at about 2am. If Owlstar has 100 haters im one of them, if Owlstar has 1 hater it's me, if Owlstar has no haters im dead.

I do! It was actually incredibly comical from my perspective because Eklutna showed up, did fuck all for 5 moons, got pregnant, then promptly died giving birth, to which i went "aw, that sucks" clicked on her kits, and SAW THAT THIER DAD WAS THE LEADER, SOMETHING THAT I DID NOT KNOW COULD HAPPEN. Eklutna didn't even have any romantic like for him, to my recollection, and Owlstar had like maybe a single tick for her? It was really just lucky rng I guess. Owl and Silt actually didn't break up in the game at all, in my original draft for the story, when i was just writing notes as i played, Siltsplash was a lot more... okay with it? Like they were pissed but their personality was a lot more demure so they didn't act on anything really. The exact quote from the draft was: "I won’t lie to you. I’m angry. Starclan, I’m more than angry, I’m furious. I have half the mind to tell you to leave and never come back.” They paused, seeing Owlstar deflate and taking some slight, bitter satisfaction in it before continuing, “But that wouldn’t be fair to those kits. They didn’t ask to be born, much less to you. They deserve to have a family, or as much of it as they are able to have, and starclan help me we’re in this together." It certainly fit with what I knew about them then, but given my ability to look forward and see future events, I decided that a break up made more sense.

Don't be sorry! I am not currently in artfight, I'm considering it but I wouldn't be able to be very active due to school, and I don't want to take another break from this blog so soon after my last, so it's not very high up on my list of priorities. I'm kinda casually working on refs for the more popular characters, so there's a chance I'll get those done and join a team, especially if it's something you guys want me to do. If that happens I'll be sure to let you guys know! I am now in art fight! I gave into peer pressure again. (In a good way).

I don't think even Silt knew. Siltsplash was OUT of it after their conversation with Owlstar, (see: the Eklutna hallucination), and they probably didn't even know where they were headed until they reached the nursery. But after setting eyes on the kits, Siltslpash knew that there was only one option. Yes, they "took the kids in the divorce" but truly they weren't thinking about revenge. They just saw kids who needed something that they could provide.

In terms of writing, though, since I have hundreds of moons of foresight, it was a total bait and switch. I needed to make sure that people had a reason to come back after the break and any comic with kittens in it usually gets a lot of attention, so it was a "marketing" decision to split up the moon the way that I did, in order to make sure that there wasn't too bad of a fall off in interaction for the blog.

In game Eklutna had an affair with Owlstar, died giving birth, and the "died giving birth" event overwrote the "reveal affair" event so technically, in game Owlstar didn't reveal the affair... ever? (Though I had written in my notes that he told Siltsplash who took them as their own). Story wise, Owlstar hadn't planned to tell anyone until the kits started asking about who their father was. Then he would tell them, and would probably reveal it to the clan when they earned their names and were able to become deputy. But, when Eklutna died all that went out the window. For all his faults, Owlstar is not a bad dad, and he would never leave his kits orphaned, even if it would get him in a lot of trouble to do so. He really does care for them, and he feels terrible about how much he's screwed up their lives so far.

He did bad, deitycrows, he did bad. He cheated on his mate and then his affair partner died in childbirth so he's not very popular rn, I've got to be honest.

I don't think it helps at all but, Owlstar did really genuinely like Eklutna! Now, was that because she never opposed him on anything and flattered him with adoring compliments at every opportunity? Possibly. But the "Starclan said" thing was honestly just more of an excuse for him. He woulda had an affair anyway, he just wouldn't have intentionally had kits with her.

:) Eklutna liked... the power that Owlstar held. She liked that he was chosen by Starclan to lead the clan, she liked that his kits are meant to inherit the position of leadership, and she liked that as the mother of his kits she would have a lot of control over both him and the leader after him. As far as his personality... he's kinda a clown but she could live with that.

To be frank: The order of inheritance is ABSOLUTELY FUCKED. If Eklutna had lived, it would be easy. She would take over as deputy until one of the kits was old enough to hold the position. But, since she's dead and Owlstar's only heirs are literal infants, as their adoptive parent Siltsplash is still the deputy for now. What happens when the kits reach adulthood is kinda up for debate. As Owlstar's closest descendant, Songkit should be deputy upon earning his warrior name, BUT Siltsplash is very much against that plan, and the kits might not want to go against their most attentive parent. So the very unhelpful answer is: We have to wait and see what the characters decide.

Thank you so much! I love to hear from first time viewers and see what you guys think of the characters! I'm glad that the dialogue worked so well and Eklutna definitely has Sol vibes! You look at both of them and go "in what world would this plan work the way you wanted it to???"

[kittzuxp]

Intro post!!!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

About me

Hi hello, you can call me kittzu/kittz/dream/drem or dremzyzz. I use any pronouns in all languages!! Also i am greek🇬🇷🇬🇷

I am a minor‼️‼️ DONT BE WEIRD.

My fav colors are black, red and teal :3

My fav animals are cats, frogs and bats :33

Yk what. I. Am. Done with gender. Genderfluid, lesbian and aspec (probably aceflux, aegosexual and demiromantic) . If u don’t like it FUCK OFF WHAT R U DOING HERE

I can be pretty shy sometimes but always open to making new friends!! (・・;)

Dnis/ do not interacts: z00s,p3d0s, homophobes, transphobes, TERFS, MAPS, racists, xenophobes, anti-therians, anti-furries, radqueers, proshippers, 'superstarights' etc and any hate groups in general.

Also @/guess-who-69 sorry

🇵🇸🍉 FREE PALESTINE

4 more info click here

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Fandoms & interests

I like reading (warriors) and drawing, but also browsing the tube. Oh and comics can't forget about those (currently reading homestuck)

I am in a loooot of fandoms but not really active in them cuz… most of them are dead..

BUT!! I have a couple of things that are currently rotting my brain (fandoms I'm hyperfixating on + active fandoms)

Brain rot real

Stardew Valley [foams at the mouth my brain is rotting]

Twomp/ the world of mr plant

Regretevator

Mob psycho 100

Sofita / johnypeace, thanakios [IF YK THIS ONE FOLLOW ME IMMEDIATELY AND DM ME SOMI CAN FOLLOW U TOOO]

Homestuck [NEW!]

Active

Ghost eyes

Sally face

The song of achilles

Ouk an lavois para tou mi ehontos (if you know this one lets get married/j)

Lacey games

Clan gen (warriors fan game by @/officialclangen)

Tgcf

Diary of a wimpy kid [doawk fanfics: Dysfunctional perspective, Rodrick's secret on the loader diper subreddit]

Unfamiliar (comic by lavendertowne pls go read it)

OMORI

Deathnote

Webtoons(/tapas) [Jackson's diary, Castle swimmer, Your wings and mine <- go read these they're awesome]

KinitoPET

Ramshackle [The webtoon & yt series]

Inactive

Warriors

Ninjago

God troubles me!

An extremely goofy movie

The Boiled One Phenomenon (PHEN-228 is my pookie ❤❤)

Salad fingers

Minecraft (the game)

Helluva boss

South park

Deltarune & undertale

The amazing digital circus‼️

Fionna and cake

Stranger things ☹️☹️ (I'm trying to not to associate the actors with the characters as to not ruin the show 4 me. I will be boycotting s5 tho)

Sonic prime

Heartstopper

Batim

Toh

Sr pelo’s content in general [spooky month and the mokey series]

Saiki k

Good omens

YuB (a youtuber, please go sub to him he’a so silly)

Love, Sam (indie horror game)

Former yandere simulator fan. After the shit with yandev happen i don’t support any of his content anymore.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Socials & tags

My discord is: forknifeistrash#1419

My wattpad: apersonyoudontknow7

My Ao3: Kittzuxp_the_pidgeon

My Artfight >ω<

Sideblogs: @lovrclan-gen @ask-lovechild-au-twomp

I don’t use it very often, but i’m also on the twompcord and clan gen server. I’m not active on the servers tho..

Tags i’ll use:

Kittzu's headcannons = pretty self explaintory, headcanon I made

Kittzu's Mr plant plushie = he's here!!!!

kittzu's argos plushie = i am legally forced to put this tag under the mr plant one.

kittzuxp = reblogs and posts (fast reblogs do not count)

Kittzu’s enderman plush (i have an enderman plush, if you want any related content, i’m sorry for advertising i just love ‘em so much)

Kittzu's creeper plush (i also have a creeper plush!!!)

Kittzu doodles = any of my art

Kittzu answers asks = do I need to explain?

storytime with kittzu = me sharing my memories and expiriences with the world. I want to leave a mark that i was here and that my existance is not forgotten. Philosophical much?

kittzu's ocs = working on a masterpost abt my ocs but there's this tag too

And then just general tags of any fandom i want the post to be abt

(I might tag your username if i don’t mention you in a post, so beware)

[🔼by @/oxceen]

[robin-fable-art]

♡ Hello! Thanks for stopping by! ♡

I decided to make a blog purely dedicated to my art. I'm a primarily digital artist who's looking to improve and put more effort into creating things I love and enjoy.

I was previously posting art every now and again on my fake main @i-have-no-braincells. I'll likely be reblogging stuff from there to build up the amount of art posted here.

I use he/him, fae/faer, it/its, and mew/mewself pronouns.

Here's a helpful link on how to use fae/faer pronouns.

Here’s a helpful link on how to use mew/mewself pronouns.

I have an AO3 here!

I’m on ArtFight!

Here are a list of my tags to easily navigate my blog:

#fabled art - my art tag

#fabled sketches - doodles, sketches, and wips

#fabled answers - answered asks

#robin speaks - robin (me) has decided to speak on tumblr.com

#robin reblogs - anything i reblog that isn’t my art or art made for me

#for the fridge - any art that's been made for/gifted to me

#this isn't an art - any non-art related post

My current hyperfixation is Pokemon, so most of my art will likely be related to that franchise.

I probably won't be posting much personal commentary or the like unless I'm answering an ask, so if you're interested in something like that, consider taking a look at my previously mentioned fake main @i-have-no-braincells.

DNI Transphobes, homophobes, TERFS, proshippers, bigots, and any other generally unsavory individuals. Seriously fuck off or I'll hunt you for sport.

[autistic-gay-men-kissing]

Hiii, I’m Gothy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I go by he/him, I’m AFAB, genderfluid, pansexual, and polyamorous!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Look, a comm sheet!

If you want to commission me, please view this post!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anyway, here’s some more info:

I’m a Hellenic Pagan!

My birthday is March 31st!!

I currently run the blogs: @genderfluid-culture-iss, @cats-with-their-heads-held-back, @our-pagan-experience, @luxios-chaotic-fucking-pokemon, and @thoughts-of-spider-crab!!

I also run: @gothys-art-n-stuff for my art ONLY, and @htkag-official for my writing, titled How to Kill a God!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MISC ACCOUNTS:

Twitter

ArtFight

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have autism, auditory processing disorder… and probably some other things but idk

Here’s some things I like: Ghost (the band), Alien (y’know those movies with Sigourney Weaver…), Baldur’s Gate 3, honestly just creatures and little guys, DnD, drawing, writing, HtKaG (yes, my own damn fandom), furries n shit, Sanrio, and uhh… idk. I’ll add more as the list continues.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ARTFIGHT 2024 CARD:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DNI LIST

Just your basic stuff, really. Homophobes, terfs, antis, nazis, etc etc. Please just fuck off with all that bullshit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tags

#gothy’s asks

#gothys asks

^ Asks

#gothy’s art

#gothys art

^ Art

#gothy’s writing

#gothys writing

^ Writing

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

idk what else to put so uhh… have any questions ask ig.

[quit-lol]

⭐️🌊 HEYA 👹👹👺 ⭐️🌊

🌹 Name’s Zer0! No other namez :3

🥩 Bigender [ He/Him only though]

☎️ MINOR. [ 15 ] DNI IF NSFW

🪓 CASSNE <33 [ DNI IF YOU DISLIKE THE SHIP. ]

🧨 1# Cassandra fan 💪💪👍

🎹 Current hyperfixation: Danganropa :3 (mostly v2 and v3 but YKNOW :)

🥀 FANDOMZ 🥀

🍁 Papa Louie!! [CAPTAIN CORY OUR GURL 👍👍] 🎃 Picos school (I hate lca <3)

🔥 Total drama ( uhh Gwen slays and so does lashawna )

🥕 The Legend of Zelda ( why is everyone going feral over purah in totk 😭)

🧡 Bendy and the ink machine (first fandom I ever joined. It’s stuck with me ever since I was 11 or 10- I don’t remember.)

📙 The Amazing world of gumball!! (I like Darwin :3)

🧈 Danganropa (the butter is iykyk..)

🏮 BYI🏮

⚠️ I suffer from extreme anxiety so please don’t block me without telling me why. It puts me in a really bad state and shit so yeah.

🧇 If I forgot something like an arttrade or something please REMIND ME!!

🧀 I Rant, vent, and ramble alot. Soo yeah if you don’t like that then idk what to say

🍋 Please be patient with me <3

🍐 DNI 🍐

🍏 EXTREME southpark fans

Talking about the ones that go like “TIMMAH” to disabled people and shit. Get the fuck away from my blog.

🥒 Antifurries/Antitherian

sorry bud I’m not gonna change my hobbie because u don’t like it 🤷‍♀️

🫑 Trauma Dumpers

I mean people who vent and ya know, Trauma dump without warning. (Other reasons too)

🪀 Autism speaks supporters

THEY THINK AUTISM IS A DISEASE I AINT GONNA TAKE U SERIOUSLY 😭💀

♻️ Cassne haters

uhm yeah bye ur gonna hate it here just leave

💠 SOCIALS 💠

❄️ Ao3: C4ndyg0r3studios

💧 Tumblr : hi! <3 🌊 YouTube: g0r3gutzandglitter

🫐 Instagram: C4ndyg0r3z 🌧 Deviant art: C4ndyg0r3z (same as Instagram lol)

🌀 Toyhou.se: C4ndyg0r3z (again woah)

🌐 Artfight: Guess (C4ndyg0r3z)

🧿 Unfortunately I forgot my newgrounds. :[

🔮 SWAG PEOPLE <33 🔮

💜 @fl4ky-sc3nek1d - RAAAA COOL FRIENDO &lt;3 💟 @autistictweekz - SWAGGG MUTALL >:333

🟣 @lovesick-alien-with-anxiety - SWAGG PERSON WITH A COOL AU 👍👍

Theres More but half of them left :[

[theovergrowth]

♥?

(( RARAHSHJSFAJAHAUA GOSSY!! GOSS BOSS!!! I AM GRABBING ALL YOUR CHARACTERS IN MY MOUTH AND SHAKING THEM AROUND LIKE DOG TOYS ))

(( First off I go fucking insane every time you link an article relating to an aspect of one of your characters, because I read it and I get so excited because I’m learning things and then ON TOP OF THAT I get to read what your thoughts are on how the information in the article actually affects and pertains to the characters and my brain just SHAKES AND EXPLODES!!! There’s so much thought anf love and intention put into all of these lil people and it comes through so clearly in everything you write and draw!!!! ))

(( I’m staring with Ithadel because. Listen. As a kid I was OBSESSED with gargoyles, but I kinda fell off around middle school and now 10 years later I am RIGHT BACK IN IT I LOVE ITHADEL AND I AM GOING TO DRAW HIM FOR ARTFIGHT AT ANY COSTS ))

(( Linast hurts my gut in a way I cannot describe, ESPECIALLY during the human incident. Like you want him to be ok and happy but you’re also like He Needs to Go Apeshit but ALSO you know that if he does it could be bad for him BUT ARENT THEY ALREADY BAD AND FAHAGSHDHSYSYHS LINAST!!!!!! ))

(( Diamond has Changed my Brain chemistry I think. I think a couple months ago was when the incarnation thing changed in my brain from “what a fun alternative way to do verses” to “oh god I’m crying I’m weeping” LIKE??? WHAT???? It’s just such a horrific yet inevitable reality in a way that really messes with me like I legitimately got sad when Teacher Diamond was explaining it to Titus because he seems so resigned to it and UGH ))

(( …I’m. Including Clemcy because even though I’ve never had a muse interact with him, I do read through his tag All The Time. I just love a well written bastard and HE IS!! I love how he feels like a Theatre Villain but still with enough power and personality to feel threatening and scary, ykno?? ))

(( OSCAR OSCAR OSCAR OSCAR I KNOW I HAVENT INTERACTED WITH HIM BUT I THINK OF HIM ALWAYS I AM PICTURING THAT DRAWING OF HIM AND SPINNING IT IN MY BRAIN CONSTANTLY I LOVE HIM ))

(( anywho you are an amazing writer and artist who I feel very lucky to get to write with, I hope life gets less busy for you and Oscar for President ))

[dzamie]

26,33,40,41

For the “Some OC questions” ask meme:

26. Have you ever had to change your OC’s design or something else about them against your will?

The hornless kobold swivels his chair around to face Dzamie, who looks up at him. “What are you looking at me for?” the katul asks, “why not Rinta, or Sel, or Azurel?”

“You’re fun to bounce ideas off of and you probably have a better memory than I do.”

“That is literally impossible, and we both know you’re using me as a rubber duck rather than- oh, fuck. Sinera.” The cheetah laughs. “Death of my first student, supposed to be some big emotional to-do, and it just takes more effort for YOU to remember you offed her!” He idly tosses a coin in the air, but puts it away before he sees what it lands on. “Y’know, arguably my ability to quickly get over her senseless murder is a condemnation of your ability to build emotional connections between your characters, and to accurately portray grief - or, if that’s inaccurate, then hoo boy killing literal hundreds if not thousands by my early 20s ended up messing up my psyche!”

The kobold’s typing slowed after Dzamie’s rapid train of thought. “You done?” he asked, and got a nod in reply.

33. Your shyest OC?

Vanille. She’s more comfortable when the area’s saturated with her pleasant-smelling breath weapon, but sometimes tries to hide her man-eating-dragon-sized body behind her human boyfriend when she’s not allowed to enthrall those around her.

40. Any fond memories linked to your characters? Feel free to share!

I met my boyfriend by method-acting as Azurel online. The /tg/ thread where I came up with hammerspace dragons is always nice, though I guess technically that wasn’t Sylvia in particular. As I said in my previous answer, Dream comes from a Spyro fanfic that I loved when I was, like, 13. Uh, technically speaking I have a HTTYD OC, a female night fury named Rem’sah, that I wrote a little fic back in middle school when I was optimistic things wouldn’t go poorly.

41. Has anyone drawn fanart of your OCs? If yes, maybe show a picture or two here (remember sources & permissions!)

Dropping a read-more here because pictures are big. The first two were drawn by @askdrakomod as requests I got hella lucky with - HM and Azurel headshots. Number 3 is Dzamie holding an Azurel plush, drawn by @raposinhachan​, though I can’t find the original post on their blog. 4 and 5 were drawn for ArtFight last year, and if they posted them anywhere else, I’m having a dickens of a time finding them: 4 is Dzbold by Cypress, and 5 is Mistress Dreamwalker by ArtisticSans. @dragonanarchist1155 also drew Dzamie, found here.

Also, DinkieShyArts drew Azurel stroking himself off, which can be found here. If you couldn’t guess from the description, it’s NSFW.

I save pretty much every fanart I get. It’s all wonderful.

[thedappleddragon]

Day 123 (Tuesday July 14th)

I woke up feeling wierd in a way that’s hard to describe. As if every other day i woke up like a clean cut 2x4 piece of wood, but today I was partially rotted and covered in dirt, trying to be fit into the same space as a clean board. Idk. But I stayed in my room for a while and made eggs for breakfast. My friends set up a dnd session last minute in our rich friend’s basement, and at first I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go. But then more people responded in the group chat and I saw my one really friendly male friend was going so I made up my mind to go. I told my mom I would need a ride and went outside in my backyard for a while with my cat. She was really cute laying in the sun and purring, but I feel bad because she can’t see outside. Her eyes are always as big as dinner plates, and while it super cute, it might also mean she has brain damage and can’t adjust her pupils. I practiced driving with my mom and sister for about 45 minutes and I did really badly. I know how roundabouts work but I fucked them up a little bit and she kept yelling at me about not slowing down and stopping properly. She was right but it still made me mad, and I was at least partially spaced out the entire time.

I got out of the car and helped the host friend look for their dnd figurine for a while until we decided that it was lost and went to the basement. She went around looking a while longer while the rest of us set things up, picking out dice and doing the best we could with limited figurines. The host eventually brought out a tray full of squinkies (tiny squishy animal toys) and Japanese erasers (the kind you take apart and put together but never actually use as an eraser). I ended up using a rock from the driveway as my figure, and the host used a little pendant with a shiny dragon scale pattern on it.

None of us knew who was going to dm before we got there, so we decided to take turns, which quickly lead to our dice goblin friend DMing. It was her first time, but she did really good!! The party started off in a tavern obviously, rolling for inebriation. Valka is underage but was served alcoholic apple cider instead of apple juice on accident lol. Then a fourtune teller approached and answered one question for each of us. I asked if Valka’s dad was doing ok, since he was on his boat and she was on land and they hadn’t seen each other in a while. He missed her 🥺. The fortune teller was sketchy and creepy and probably scammed us but it was fun anyway. The next morning a little boy approaches us, asking if we can help find his dog. We were all suspicious at first, but Valka trusted him pretty quickly. We followed him until he ran into the forest, where we were immediately suspicious again, questioning him about what kind of dog he was looking for and if there really was a dog or if it was an illusion. We reached a clearing in the forest where he pulled out a knife and 3 bandits jumped out of the bushes. Valka immediately pulled out a mace and hit him upside the head, having no problem beating up a fellow child. Combat was going great until the first “bandit” was killed, whereupon the little boy turned his head around and shouted “DAD!” My soul SHATTERED in that moment. The next bandit got hit and the the kid whipped his head the other direction and cried out “DAD!” again. The dog went down and he cried out “CHARLIE, NO!” We were atracking this poor child’s dog and two gay dads. The third bandit, their daughter, ran the other way. When Valka’s turn rolled around she ran over to the unconscious dad and spent a health potion she had stolen back when school was in session and dnd club was still a thing. He was still unconscious, but stable. She was the first to stop attacking because she loves her dad very much, and could never imagine what she would do if her father was hurt or killed. We called for the family to come back. They were very poor, having to resolve to mugging and petty crime to survive. We all apologized for attacking and set up a campfire in the clearing.

We rolled for an order in which to tell stories around the fire, but then the host friend offered to make chicken tenders for us all so we paused the game. We sat downstairs and chatted for a little while until I realized the host wasn’t coming back downstairs, so we went upstairs and sat on the couch and talked. I laid down, and dice goblin friend laid down perpendicular to me and I burst out laughing from the sudden urge to just slap her face. Later, she picked up her head and I sat upright normally, instinctually picking up a pillow and putting it on my lap. She laid back down with her head on the pillow, so I patted her head and stole her glasses. We all traded glasses and compared eyesight like people always do whenever someone takes off their glasses. When the chicken tenders were done, we brought them downstairs along with chips and dips and goldfish and snacked and listened to the host talk about star wars to way too long. Friendly male friend had to leave, and dice goblin and baby friends’ social batteries were running low, so we hmmed and hawed for a minute wondering what to do until the host recommended watching a movie. We watched History of the World Part 1, and it was really damn funny and vulgar. I probably would have preferred if it was toned down a little bit, and all my favorite parts were the lack of sex/orgy jokes, but I still enjoyed it. Then we settled into quietly drawing together. I drew moments from the night and inside jokes and whatever came to mind.

I had some pizza and watched YouTube and painted the driveway rock I took, just kind of chilling for a while. I checked artfight and accidentally made myself mad. I got upset that I put a lot of effort into my attacks to make them look nice, and not liking some of the attacks I get back. I understand that that’s just part of artfight and not every artist is at the same skill level, and it might sound petty of me, but whatever. What makes me the most upset was when all the other pieces an artist made for other people look really nice, but then the one they made for me looks rushed or in a different style. Idk man typing this out makes me feel like an asshole, but I still want to document my thoughts and feelings. If anyone from AF is reading this, don’t worry!! I’m not mad at you!!! It’s all good.

[fawn-paws]

I didn’t want to, but I may have to make a donations post. And spread it on all my social media and reblog and repost it constantly. Because we’re getting into a scary situation and we don’t have many options to fall back on. I’m going to explain my situation here in case I do make a post and anyone who sees it becomes curious because it’s very long-winded and I don’t want to clutter the post. Idk

So I’ve become jobless, I don’t think I can file for unemployment because I quit my job willingly. Basically my health is so bad that I couldn’t continue working, as my job was physically strenuous and my health deteriorated every day. I’m not sure what I can do in that regard because I don’t think my condition counts as a physical disability. I’d have to go to more doctors to find out, which I can’t afford.

(For anyone who hasn’t seen my posts where I’ve constantly complained about it (sorry), I’m severely anemic to the point where it causes me intense vertigo and fainting spells. I was calling off work more and more frequently because I would be so dizzy I couldn’t even get out of bed, let alone walk for 8 hours, go up and down ladders or carry heavy items. I went to several doctors and they couldn’t find any other reasons why I could be getting dizzy, but I suspect there are other reasons as well. I can’t afford to go to any more doctors. The bills were adding up and after a blood test showing me I was anemic I felt that was the best answer I could find. I also have scoliosis and chronic fatigue/lightheadedness which makes it hard to stand for long periods and get up and down and move quickly. I have fell and hit my head so many times at work, and I have fainted as well. So I’ve been trying to find jobs that I won’t have to do much physical activity. And before you ask, no, eating more doesn’t help. Exercise doesn’t help. I’ve been taking iron supplements and eating better and more often. It has improved a bit, but not enough to do a physical job. It’s not an option for me anymore. I also can’t afford to buy much food so I’m sure my health will only get worse. I don’t have much of an option there either).

So. As far as assistance. We’ve been looking into metro housing because the rent here is obviously too high for us. And we’ve applied for electric assistance and food assistance programs, which we are currently working on getting interviews for. But if we have to continue paying the rent here, it’s not going to make that much of a difference because it’s $1100 a month. So we may have to move, which will be hard, especially if there are none available in time of emergency. We have nowhere else to move to, we have too many things and we have 3 cats so our family and friends can’t take us in.

We also have doctor bills we need paid and the assistance my bf applied for denied him because the letter that came in asking for additional documentation didn’t get to us in time, which is bullshit. But that’s a $2,000 bill because he was in the emergency room. And we obviously can’t pay that.

I still owe my bf for 2 month’s rent and I only have $182 in my bank account. He says he isn’t worried about it, but he’s running out of money too. His job doesn’t pay very well and it’s hard to find any other jobs out here that pay any better. It’s also extremely strenuous and stressful and he doesn’t get many hours, but it’s hard work and he’s constantly exhausted, physically and emotionally.

I’ve been doing freelance work and taking commissions, but it’s not enough. Again, I only have about $182 currently. To my name. I have nothing else. And I can’t work fast enough to take more commissions. I’m still working on the ones I have. I really wanted to do artfight and revenge the people who have attacked me but I don’t have the time or mental energy. I’ve been trying to finish up commissions, do the chores and take care of the cats, cook, apply for jobs and assistance programs, all while hardly eating to conserve food so I feel like garbage every goddamn day lol.

I know I complain so much all the time and I probably sound like a fucking brat and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m always complaining but I’m scared and everything is just so fucking hard right now. Idk what to do and I’m starting to panic. I hate asking for handouts. If I could take more commissions I would, but hardly anybody ever even wants them, even when I constantly boost them, even when my posts get lots of notes, so what’s the point. So I don’t think hardly anyone will donate, if anyone at all, because I can’t give anything in return at this point.

And I don’t want to make anyone feel guilty. And I don’t want my friends to feel like they need to give me money because they’re my friends, I don’t want anyone to give me money purely for pity or because they feel obligated. But if anyone can spare anything, that would be great. I really just need something so we can continue paying rent, so I can pay my doctor bills at the very least, and to buy food for ourselves. Besides bills and rent, we have been focusing on buying cat food and cat litter because the cats are our priority. They haven’t missed a single meal, so don’t worry.

Anyway. I’ll probably make a proper donations post. I just wanted to explain my situation to anyone who wants to know. And also to vent. Because that’s just what I do. I’m sorry

I’m putting these here too for anyone who is interested in donating

P*yPal @/jaratekiid (https://www.paypal.me/jaratekiid)

V*nmo @/jaratekid

C*shapp $/LoveCoreFawn

[finsterhund]

Alright. So the new tumblr update makes it really difficult to use the site on my laptop (every single website decided to pull this within months of each other. Ugh. Why) so I’m probably going to make big update posts instead of little ones.

The struggle for the stuffed dog that DHL won’t deliver continues. I complained to ebay, me and the seller joked about how much the Global Shipping Program sucks ass, and I was reassured by the seller that they wouldn’t get in trouble because the package reached the global shipping program.

Instead of actually solving the problem and holding the global shipping program accountable (which they seldom do and the site feedback is intentionally designed that way) despite me telling them that I didn’t want a refund and wanted the item, they refunded me without permission.

Distraught at the thought of a stuffed dog lost and alone out in the world somewhere (it’s like my own personal The Seventh Brother. Oh no), I was very upset so I essentially invaded the DMs of multiple “official” DHL twitter accounts.

Then I found someone else selling the same stuffed dog and bought it using the refunded money impulsively.

Then, despite my professional email with DHL’s actual customer service on their website going unanswered for half a month, the twitters got back to me within hours. And the Canadian DHL made it sound like they were helping me. But we shall see.

Best case scenario: two dogs

Most likely scenario: one dog gets lost

Worst case scenario: both dogs lost (I will flip the fuck out if this happens)

A word of advice. Don’t bother with a website’s confusing customer service. Just DM their twitter account.

I’m actually doing artfight attacks this year. Upset I got put on team spice instead of team sugar, but most of my friends are on team sugar so that gives me and them a chance to attack each other before I switch. I already did an attack for my one friend that I’m super proud of, and am planning another tomorrow.

I’ve also been managing to write. Finished several short stories that I posted into the HoD fan forums last week. I’m also still working on the long ass one that I am working on super slowly. I wish I could get into serious roleplay again. Like, story-driven Heart of Darkness themed adventure sorta stuff. Either Cayden or Andy I don’t really care.

My back has been messing up real bad. I think it’s the thunderstorm and stuff. Speaking of which, thunder one day, then fireworks the next. :( Loud bangs mean I have to sleep with my big noise cancelling headphones on which is uncomfortable. I’m hoping my pain eases off soon. I played a single game of Mario Party sitting on the couch yesterday and it hurt so bad afterwards that I just lay in bed for ten minutes trying not to cry. Need me those spectre chiropractors lol.

Penumbra is very nice to cuddle with. His added weight makes him very comforting and cuddly. I am finding myself more motivated to do things by the thought of getting to lie down with Penumbra afterwards. I’m seriously thinking that once the customs at the border stops being deranged of sending Whisky to Lil Sprout Care and getting him weighted and scented. Though being apart from him for more than a week or so doesn’t sound too good. Maybe I’ll get a Spot scented and weighted instead. Or Outside Tiny (I was going to do that myself, but what do you know, I’m a lazy whelp who prefers when other people do things for him. Oops.)

My friend Will is making me super cute Paper Beast fan art and I’m waiting until the 7th (when his commissions open) to commission another artist for more. No spoilers yet but they both involve Spot :3

I’m also planning to commission Will for somebody else’s birthday... >.> hmmmm I wonder who...

Again, a reminder that the HoD fan forums are open, I’m just being selective with where I share the link to it. If you want to make an account just contact me and I’ll get you sorted. The forums have sites for talk about the game itself, writing in the game’s universe, fan art, and also for writing and art inspired by the game. (cool alien monsters and stuff like that.) it’s pretty sweet. We have the shoe as an emote that I like to use whenever somebody dies lol.

[thedappleddragon]

Day 112

I woke up kind of late and helped my sister and dad clean the house. I put on a random record to listen to while cleaning, but it turned out to be some 70s hair band and listening to it just made me madder than I would be cleaning in the quiet. My dad kept asking me to do things but he doesn’t tknow what he’s talking about so that made me angry too. I swept an vacuumed the floor. He worked outside for a while, and when he came back inside, he ate my Chinese food >:(. Later he asked me to clean the glass table in the backyard, and I saw that he had dug up some of my favorite plants. One was a vine that grew along the fence and grabbed onto the tree next to it beautifully, two were really interesting vines with little purple flowers that turned into poisonous berries, one near the trampoline and one next to the house, and I saw him pull up some “weeds” in the front yard he promised not to touch. He also chopped down several plants that I had been hoping to watch grow. He hoed up everything in the dirt and it made me so fucking angry I had to go back inside, where I saw my dog sitting on my bed, and that set me the fuck off. I (figuratively) kicked him out of my room and punched my bed and threw my pillows and body slammed into the bed to let out all my frustration, and almost cried of anger. I was more angry about my dog, because he has really bad fleas and I’ve been working so damn hard to make my room nice and get rid of all the fleas so I can have a nice space to relax. I tired myself out beating the shit out of my bed and accidentally punch my phone full force in the process, and watched pixielocks’s new video all wrapped up in blankets and pillows to try and forget everything. I head the doorbell ring and I didn’t want to answer it, but it was my sister and she was home with mcflurries. She had gone out driving with my mom and accidentally went on the highway, freaking her out, so she got ice cream as compensation. I hung out in her room for a second before returning to my room to watch more YouTube. I went outside to clean the glass table and back door with my cat, and as revenge for my dad cutting down the poison berry vines I picked a few off of the pant in the trash and buried them. I planted 6, so I hope at least one will grow, but the berries were all still green and not quite ripe. I at least hope the vines will grow back. I hate when my dad messes with things when they don’t need to be messed with. I found myself thinking that while outside, and I’m reminded of how similar I’m becoming with my mom. I stay in my bed in my room and I don’t want people touching my things. Idk man I’ve got stuff to work through. But I came inside from cleaning and spent who knows how long laying on my bed, looking around my room, and just thinking while patting out a rhythm on my ribs. I finally got up, deciding to write down a bunch of dates on my calendar for graduation celebrations and open houses and my neighbor’s funeral. Later in the evening I checked artfight, and hooray the website is back up!! And I saw that I got 4 attacks!!! That made me overjoyed and I left a nice thank you comment on each one and started plotting my revenge right away. I spent the rest of the night drawing with a burrito dinner break from moe’s. Now it’s 5 am. Shit. My art started getting tired during the first piece of the night, and my head started hurting during the second. I think it’s because I was drawing the character with a worried expression, and I did the wierd artist thing where you make the expression you’re drawing. I was holding that face for so long subconsciously that it gave me a headache. Maybe a combination of that and all the times I was angry today. At about 3 am, I couldn’t stop thinking about this one time when I had just met someone who’s now part of the friend group when we were walking through the school parking lot talking about the hit or miss girl and the friend yelled that she was a trap and I yelled that that was a slur and I couldn’t stop honking about it so I texted her saying I was sorry.

But she said she was in the wrong and honestly didn’t remember the incident, so that made me feel a little better about it. I’ve still been thinking about things I don’t want to and shaking my head and cursing more recently, even though I said I wanted to try to stop. I’ve also not really felt real and in the moment in a long time. It might be phone addiction, idk. But who cares I’m gonna try to go to bed goodnight ✨