#I’m drinking tea and eating hummus like it’ll fix me

[d1sc0-1nfern0]

Me, finally not sick, going to work regularly, having a good time: :D

My brother with the immune system of a military tank: Gets super sick

Me with the immune system of melted plastic wrap: :(

[builder051]

Congrats on 100!! I'd love 29 cause I'm super obsessed with appendicitis oops

I think appendicitis is a great trope too!  Problem is, you can only torture each character with it once…

___

Colby’s been up and down all night.  Sitting on the toilet, in front of the toilet, guzzling water from the tap, brewing peppermint tea as quietly as possible, all to no avail.  His stomach still hurts, and Jason, who seems to be in the deeply unconscious clutches of his REM cycle, isn’t stirring when Colby makes weak attempts at cuddling.  There’s something peaceful about being awake at 3:30 in the morning. He thinks for a moment about trying to make it to one of those sunrise yoga classes, but abandons the idea immediately.  He’d vomit all over his mat if he tried to press into downward dog in his current condition.

He curls onto his right side with his chin hovering over Jason’s shoulder, ineffectively spooning his boyfriend’s sprawled frame.  But the position hurts, and he rolls to his back, shutting his eyes and wishing the painful cramp or whatever the hell it is will go away.

It doesn’t, but Colby does eventually find sleep again.  It’s light outside, and Jason’s mumbling something about Honey Bunches of Oats when he next opens his eyes.  He’s uncomfortably hot, and when he sits up, his t-shirt clings to him with sweat.

“What happened to you?” Jason asks blearily.

“Am I glamorous?” Colby replies, clearing his throat and pushing damp hair off his forehead.  He cracks a smile, but it turns to a grimace when the ache in his abdomen decides to tick up a couple notches.

“You’re kind of a mess,” Jason says.  “You ok?”

“Yeah, I’m good.”

“Dude.  No, you’re not.”  Jason finds a seated position too.

“Yeah, well.  My stomach kind of hurts,” Colby admits.  “But, I don’t know.  Probably not a big deal.”

“What, did you get food poisoning from your organic hummus or something?”  It’s a joke, but concern shows in Jason’s eyes.

“I don’t think so,” Colby says.  “I’ve been kind of up and down, like, waiting for something to happen, but I think I’m really fine.  Just kind of uncomfortable.”

“If you need the bathroom, I can always commandeer Mike’s,” Jason offers.

“If you did that, she’d murder you,” Colby laughs, wrapping his arm around his stomach to dispel the resultant throb.

“Seriously, though,” Jason says.  “You don’t look so good.”

“I’m ok.  I don’t have class till this afternoon, so I’ll probably just chill.  See if this’ll work itself out.”

“Well, in that case,” Jason says, leaning in to kiss Colby’s bristly cheek.  “I’m taking the bathroom first.”

Colby vegs against the pillows for a while, then forces himself to drink another glass of water while he watches Jason shovel down cereal.

“Call me if you don’t feel better, ok?” Jason says as he loads homework into his binder and readies his backpack for the day.  “I can come home or pick up some pepto or something.”

“Nice offer, but don’t worry about me,” Colby answers.  “It’s too close to the end of the semester for you to miss class.”

“Since when do you care about class?  Maybe I do need to worry about you!”

“Naw, you care about class.”  They both laugh.  “Now get going,” Colby says.

Half an hour later, Colby’s standing in the shower.  His stomach isn’t bloated, but the persistent pain feels like the worst possible case of gas.  He swallows a mouthful of water from the showerhead and tries to force himself to burp, convinced he’ll feel better if he just relieves a bit of the pressure built up inside him.  Nothing happens, though.  He pushes until he almost gags, then cringes.  Washes his hair. Finishes up.

He dresses in sweats and tries to think through his options.  Colby feels maybe a bit worse than he did when he first woke in the middle of the night.  He thinks perhaps a fever is slowly creeping up on him, and his stomachache is sitting consistently in the could-possibly-puke territory.  He fixes tea and toast he has no intention of consuming and sits on the couch.  He turns on Pandora and slouches into the cushions, wondering if 9:30 in the morning is too early for a nap.

“Are you listening to Indigo Girls?”  Mike’s face is a twist of disgust and confusion.

It takes Colby a second to find himself in space and time, then swallow down hot nausea, and finally formulate an answer.  “I guess.”  He doesn’t know what radio station he’s listening to.  Probably folk pop or something like that.

“You’re so weird,” Mike pronounces.  Then, “What’s wrong with you?  Aren’t you, like, usually reading the Kama Sutra or cataloging endangered leaves or something by this hour?”

“Nothing,” Colby says.

But Mike glares at him and says, “You’re sick.  Which is weirder.  You never get sick unless one of us does first.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Colby says, repeating his conversation with Jason earlier.  “Go to school.”

“Yeah, I will, but I’m starting to think I’m in the twilight zone.”  She looks down at the cold, untouched toast.  “You’re eating white carbs and everything.”  Mike shakes her head.

“Mm.  Yeah.  My stomach,” Colby explains.  As if on cue, said stomach convulses painfully and sends prickling nausea up his throat. “Give me a minute, here,” he mumbles, standing up and stumbling into the bathroom.

Colby drops to his knees in front of the open toilet and breathes, waiting for the inevitable gagging to start.  He can practically feel liquid in his stomach preparing to eject, but nothing happens except a swell of seasick dizziness.  “Fuck, come on,” Colby curses.  He rests his chin on the toilet seat.  He spits excess saliva from his mouth and waits to start retching.  He feels beyond disgusting.  Colby sticks two trembling fingers down onto the back of his tongue.  He gets as far as triggering a cough when a voice comes from the doorway.

“You sure you want to do that?” Mike asks, exhausted cynicism heavy in her tone.

“Christ, fuck, Mike,” Colby croaks, putting both hands back on the toilet bowl.  “God.  Of course I don’t.  I didn’t… I’m sorry.”

“No, I get it,” she says.  “You just…wanna get it over with.”

“God.  Yes.”  The nausea’s squeezing is brain and his stomach in opposite directions.  He finally gags, though nothing comes up.  A second pitch forward brings a trickle of water.

“See, it’ll happen on its own.”

“Ugh.  Yeah,” Colby breathes

“Alright.  Well.  I’ll leave you to it.”  Mike retreats down the hall.

As soon as he has breath, Colby calls, “Go to school,” after her.  “Don’t worry about me.”

“Wasn’t planning on it,” carries back.

The front door bangs open and shut, and Colby heaves raggedly until he’s empty.  The nausea hasn’t lessened much, and all that seems appealing is getting horizontal again.  He meanders back to the living room and swallows a sip of his cold tea.  If this is how things are going to be, Colby knows dehydration’s going to be his main enemy.

He badly needs a distraction from the figurative railroad tie stabbing at his internal organs.  One of Jason’s books is on the coffee table, and Colby picks it up.  He absorbs the first few chapters of Leaving Mother Lake and decides that whatever class has assigned this book needs to get on his schedule next semester.  The story of the young protagonist growing up in rural China is surprisingly engaging for a school book.  Until there’s a passage about rooster blood and Colby has to race his nausea to the toilet.

There’s hardly anything to vomit up, but that doesn’t stop Colby’s body from turning itself inside out.  Bile drips from his lower lip with a slow cadence while heaviness draws his head down onto his arms.  Time moves oddly; it seems to take a long stretch for him to recover from each heave, but in no time at all he’s spitting up snot and acid all over again.

It turns out a lot of time has passed, and all of a sudden there are cool hands on his face and neck.

“Hey, wake up.  God, you’re burning.”

“Hm?”  Colby looks up to see Jason, and he struggles to put together a cohesive timeline.  Is it morning?  Or evening?  Has he missed class?  Does he even have class today?

“So, not feeling any better, I take it.”  Jason wets a washcloth and presses it to the back of Colby’s overheated neck.

Colby grunts, making a rippling echo tear across the toilet water.

“You definitely have a fever.  Is it still mostly your stomach?” Jason asks, popping a squat beside Colby.

“Yeah,” Colby exhales.  “It, uh, it really hurts.”

Jason worries his lip and nods slightly as he locks onto Colby’s glazed eyes.  “This is really serious, huh?”

“I, uh, yeah, maybe?”

“You never complain about anything.  You have the highest pain tolerance of anyone I know, except maybe my stupid sister, and this is hitting you hard,” Jason says.

Colby sighs.  Fights the urge to dry heave.

“Where is it hurting you the most?”

“Here?  Ish?”  Colby uses his quivering fingertips to draw an imprecise oval between his navel and right hip bone.  “’s like I’m getting fucking stabbed.”

“Ok, we have to go to the hospital,” Jason says, rising to his knees and putting a supporting arm around Colby’s shoulders.

“No, I don’t…I’m…” he breaks off and gags hard.

“Do not tell me you’re fine when I’m almost positive this is your appendix.  This is serious,” Jason insists, getting Colby to his feet. “We’re going to the ER.”

“I’m gonna puke in your car,” Colby murmurs, knowing Jason will be squeamish about any bodily fluids that are uncontained.

Jason takes a deep breath.  “It’s ok.  We have to go, though.”

They’re halfway down the hall when the front door bangs open and Mike’s unmistakable lightweight footsteps shuffle inside.

“Hey, better idea, we’ll make Mike drive,” Jason says with a guilty grin.

Colby laughs, then redoubles his grip around his aching stomach.

[taesthetes]

vn army anon sending u some love ♡ that's good u hang out a lot! what fun did u do together last time u saw each other? taeyeon is srsly so beautiful&talented; stan talent, stan singers like taeyeon👏🏻 I've already pre-ordered 'her' (had a hard time deciding whether buying the set but I did it eventually&now my bank acc is crying;-;). are u gonna buy the set or an individual album? omg yees I can name the whole list of heize's songs lol. but my all time faves are Star, And July ft. DEAN (he's–

–also great, one of my top male soloists!) or Don’t Come Back but her album /// (You, Clouds, Rain) is great overall! it has a mellow&relaxing vibe, perfect on rainy days&lonely nights~ u should also check out her mvs bc they’re so aesthetic i love them! jun ji hyun recently starred in a fantasy/rom-com drama titled legend of the blue sea with lee min ho and I did like this one bc it was srsly so funny I recommend it! u can watch the trailer first, she plays a mermaid who’s new to the human–

–world so it’s funny watching her acting being silly😂 oh cool u also played basketball?? and that’s awesome, gosh I admire talented artists like wow how can some ppl be so frickin talented! did u post any of ur works on ur blog? and what do u usually like to paint/draw? I used to draw a lot when I was a kid, not sure if I’ll get back to it tho, haven’t drawn in ages. it’d be hella awesome if we were in the same net^^~ also I changed my mobile theme&about me page finally after a century😂

–sounds&looks a bit depressingly tho😅 oh good news, my laptop is totally useless-which doesn’t sound like good news but–therefore I’m gonna get a new one so sis told me she’ll buy me a new macbook (she wanted to give it to me as a present next year when I’ll graduate but now that my current one died lol she’ll give it to me now) so I’m gonna get it next week&I’m so excited I’ll finally get to work on this gfx I had an idea in my head~ what did u do staying up so late?? it’s 3:11 am here now😅

–and it’s totally fine! answer me whenever u want, petal! good luck in moving into ur dorm! omg I also dislike the sun! not entirely dislike but I do prefer cooler/rainy weather more than extremely hot&sunny one. changing colors of leaves+windy rainy weather is my aesthetic☺️ also I like fall bc I love drinking hot tea in my cozy blanket on cold rainy days enjoying a good show/movie/book&spring bc it’s the season of rebirth, awakening, flowers blooming&birds singing, the season of innocence,–

–tenderness&fragility. aah I also adore dogs-I’m def a dog person!-and sushi is delicious~ & I like oversized shirts/jumpers too! other things that make me happy I can think of are rainfall, space (stars, moon, etc.), the sound of the piano, tasty food, bangtan&ofc min yoongi💞 also saw ur selfie and omgadffjdhjkddjk ur so pretty cute☺️💖 it’s 3:42 am now so I’m off to sleep🌙 goodnight, petal 💫🌸

hi, raindrop!! sending you lots of love and hugs back!! 💞💞 well, we’ve been binge watching criminal minds together along with watching all of 13 reasons why for the past couple of weeks! and we went on a city day trip last week :D omg yes, stan taeyeon if you want to stan beauty, talent, and overall, an ethereal goddess 💖💖💖 omg you bought the entire set?? rip your bank account D: i think i’ll only buy one album because i’m not ready to give bighit all my money ahaha– but i still haven’t ordered yet akjsdfas (i’m currently taking a break from packing and will probably buy it once i settle into my dorm tomorrow) 

i just made a new playlist with those songs and am listening to them now!! i’m currently listening to And July and i really like it so far! DEAN also did a song with taeyeon (starlight) and i really liked his voice in that one, too! if you have any other song suggestions, i’d love to hear them!! and i’ll make sure to check out her mv’s after i finish packing everything 😅 oooh omg, i’ve heard of legend of the blue sea! my friends who watch kdramas really enjoyed it a lot as well, so i’ll make sure to add it to my list :D i think i might watch that one first since it seems to be more comedic in comparison to the other kdramas on my list.

yes, i played basketball! i used to do a few sports and dances before, but i stopped now. omg yeah, i absolutely adore any artist because it’s so amazing how they are able to put a piece of themselves on canvas so freely? like they’re putting themselves out there for everyone to see. and no, unfortunately, i don’t have any of my pieces posted on my blog- i can take a picture of a few and put add them in here when i get the chance!! i usually enjoy drawing/painting inanimate objects because i’m really terrible at drawing people realistically aha, but abstract art is also so much fun to make as well! drawing is really relaxing and stress relieving for me, so maybe it’ll also be relaxing for you if you decide to pick it up again? :D

yeah, it would be!! i’m searching for a couple tae, yoongi, or hyung line nets to join, so maybe we’ll be in the same network in the future? :D ahhhh, i wish i could see them, but i’m sure they’re really pretty!! i haven’t touched my about page in over a year.. i should probably change it up sometime. omg congrats!!! 🎉🎉 my sister also bought me a mac when i graduated, too; i guess that’s a perk of having an older sister ahaha and i’m so happy for you! hopefully, everything goes more smoothly with your new laptop and you can make as many gfx and gifs to your heart’s content 💗💗

i stayed up watching law and order: special victims unit and eating carrots with hummus 😅 i better fix my sleep schedule asap though or else i’m gonna be a mess and sleeping in my classes ahhh. omg what did you do so late?

and thank you!!! i’m excited, but also sad to leave my bed aha. yes, that is me exactly! i hate feeling so hot and sweaty during the warm weather, and that’s my favorite pastime during cold, rainy weather as well!! sipping hot tea with a good book in hand and in fluffy pajamas and a nice, warm blanket 💛 aksjdfhals but the way you describe each season is so pretty omg wow 💓🌸

i absolutely love animals in general ahhh i want a dog and cat in the future so badly. do you have a dog or any pets? :D and yes omg sushi is very delicious and i’m craving it now ajshdflja and oversized clothes is so nice and comfy, i love them a lot. oooh omg all those make me really happy, too! the sound of rain and feeling water pattering against your skin is so nice, and of course, space is just so magical and i love looking at the moon and stars at night. do you play the piano? and yes, food never fails to make me happy, too, and of course, mr. min suga and the rest of bangtan 💘💘

and thank you so much, raindrop!! akljhfalsk you’re making me blush so much 💕💕 and good night, raindrop! good night, sleep tight, don’t let the (rap) monsters bite, dream of food and dogs tonight ✨💤

[dearweightlossdiary-blog1]

Dear Weight Loss Diary: Day 2

Weight: 65.8kg Water drank: 2L ish? Calorie count: 6kcal (feels inaccurate, probably went over)

Intermittent fasting is pretty hard. I thought it'd be easy because I never eat breakfast - I haven't since intermediate. But waking up early on the weekend, I find myself lying in bed and not wanting to get up because it's 4~5 hours before I can eat. I know that if I get up too early, it'll be really hard for me to control myself and not eat anything before 2pm. I have a habit of snacking and munching at my desk, which really sucks because that's where I am most of the day on the weekends. I'm still wondering what I should eat for lunch - I'm really craving grapes but that's more like a snack. It pains me that the normal amount of grapes I eat is worth almost ~450kcal :( Arms are pretty sore from bench pressing yesterday, and glutes hurt a little from the squats. Pain is gain though! I'm gonna drink some water and see if that can help curb my hunger for another 2 hours or so.

I remember losing a lot of weight in my second to last year of high school. Main reason being, I just ate a lot less and paid attention that what I was eating. It wasn't like I had much choice anyway, since I couldn't just buy whatever food I wanted. But now with a part time job, and with UberEats and all that, I can afford most foods I'm craving. That certainly doesn't help with my cravings. I want pasta? $20.00 excluding delivery fee? Hit me up UberEats. I would actually love to meal prep, but I'm worried I'll get sick of the food, and also I don't have enough space in my refrigerator to meal prep properly.

Tried out the Turkish place near my house for lunch today! Had a chicken souvlaki on rice which was really, really good. Pretty spicy though.  The plate was piled high with lettuce, carrots, chicken, rice, and two sauces (I chose hummus and mild chili). I didn't manage to finish it, but it was still delicious! I'll definitely be back to try it again, but maybe a less spicier option. I also walked half a kilometer to a café on the other side of my house, and bought a chocolate tart (for me) and a cinnamon brioche (for my sister). Coming home, I got myself a bowl of grapes. These grapes are so juicy and so crisp, but its calorie count is pretty high so I only did about 100kcal worth of grapes. Wish I could have more, but with everything I had today (and am going to have), I'm definitely over the limit.

I also asked my sister to grab me bubble milk tea on her way back from work - I should really stop drinking this, now that I'm looking back at my cravings. At least I'm logging it, but it's still not good enough. If I want to lose weight properly, I need to fix my diet and control my cravings.

Finished the milk tea with pearls and herbal jelly - feeling kinda sick. Dinner was super late so I passed on it, but I'm not feeling that hungry which is great! Still feel like I ate too much junk today though. Not much exercise either except for the going out for lunch part. Mainly stayed cooped up at home playing Yakuza 0 and watching LoL Worlds. Gonna put more effort into gyming next week.