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randomxfiction · 6 years ago

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Hello! Would you mind reading a stupid crossover fic for fun? (PS. there’s a hint of KakaSaku there somewhere (๑>ᴗ<๑))

Don’t Get Lost In A Different Show Then Decide To Break Things Randomly Sakata Gintoki x Haruno Sakura (Part I)

The night is always young inside the streets of Kabukicho, and the city of Edo is looking as peaceful as ever. Except maybe for a huge blood moon mysteriously hovering over the city, but aside from that, there’s nothing to be really worried about.

To be honest, that red moon looks like it's from a different show.

Anyway.

Plates are crashing loud on the floor and sake bottles are flying here and there. A girl with a pink hair is currently going on a rampage in Bar Otose.

"Oy, oy, Gintoki," the landlady pokes the lone silver-haired samurai awake. His arms were crossed over the bar counter, obviously drunk, lazily he raised his face to respond. "Otose-san, truth is," a hiccup came out, "I got no money to pay you."

"What makes you think I didn't know that? You never paid me anything, you dumbass!" The fierce bar owner slaps his face hard, twisting his neck to face the other way. With blood coming out of his nose, the pissed off samurai rose from his chair, stepped one foot over the bar stool and grabbed the old lady's collar as if he's picking up a fight. "Son of a bitch, that hurts!"

Unfazed with the drunk middle-aged samurai, Otose once again smacked his face flying back to the bar counter. "Your breath stinks!"

He grunts as he holds his bleeding head with both hands, massively irritated with the loud fist fighting and pieces of ceramics crashing in the background. Oh, did he hear a wooden table just broke in half? Who knows, who cares, he's too dizzy to glance over his shoulders.

"Was your bar always this loud!?" He shouts to the old lady. "My kids might wake up--!" Wait, they are sleeping at the dojo tonight, right?

"Listen, yorozuya," the owner appeared calmly behind the counter to face him, this time with a looming proposal.

"I told you already, no money!"

"Shut up and listen first!" Another smack went burning across his face. "This is sudden, but obviously there’s a job for you," she starts.

"I told you already, I'm never going to sleep with you no matter how drunk I get!" His words slur and a hiccup came out from his mouth, the same stinking sake-breath puffed to the air.

"This bastard is hopeless," she muttered to herself, exasperated with the samurai and the pink haired lady tearing her bar apart. All of her customers left at this point, and the three of them are the only ones left.

"Tonight's tab is on the house, just do the damn job," Otose gambles.

"Eh?! I can't hear you, Otose-san! It's too loud in here!"

"Oh for fuck's sake, Gintoki, you heard me," she continues to haggle. As of the moment, walls are getting torn down by the wild pink hair, and broken wood planks are flying towards the stockroom, breaking more sake bottles.

"Fine, a month's rent worth, and make it quick!"

"What is it again, crusty grandma!? A month's rent AND tonight's tab? Please speak louder because I really can't hear you properly!" The samurai shouts with a drunken straight face.

She grunts, defeated with an eyebrow twitching furiously. If only her face slaps can match the stupid pink haired lady's monstrous strength, she swear she would've done it herself. But looking at this obviously misplaced character infront of her, Otose can definitely smell the word trouble. She should be thanking her stars that Gintoki is in the bar tonight.

"Fine!" she roars back.

"OH-KAY! Yorozuya Gin-chan now on duty!" In one swift move, Gin twisted his bar stool enthusiastically, along with his body to finally face the noisy pink haired son of a bitch. He drew his wooden sword dangling from his waist then rushed up to her straight ahead. With one strong hit, the lady flies unconscious to the open street then drops flat on the cold pavement.

Gintoki follows her body outside. "Is she dead?" Otose shouts to him from the back of the counter. He used his shiny, polished boots to move her head slightly only to notice her breathe pacing up, like an angry bull contemplating its next murder.

"She'll be fine," he waves back to Otose inside the bar and smiled awkwardly. "Don't forget this month's rent is paid alrea--"

Before he knows it, an extremely powerful tackle sends both of them flying to the next street. Gintoki hits the stone ground first, rubble bursting from the force, and was quickly followed by the pink-haired lady, slamming his midsection further to the ground. She gets up and cages him in between her thighs, and a series of consecutive monstrous punches proceeds to be thrown towards his face.

"Oy!" he shouts angrily. “OY!” Gin grabs her arms and pulls her upwards, flipping her as he smashes her back to the pavement. He gets up and cages her in between his thighs, completely swapping the earlier position. "What the fuck is wrong with you!?"

In his surprise, everything stopped. The lady actually stops moving and darts her gaze to meet his dead-fish eyes. Her chest heaves heavily and a mess of pink hair is all covered in sweat, its threads sticking on her cheeks and forehead. Gin can see her eyes glowing in a beautiful shade of green under the Kabukicho streetlights, but wasn't able to admire it properly. She definitely looks plastered and her face looks like a giant tomato.

Just how much sake did she actually drink earlier? Why does she look like a divorced woman? How can a beautiful lady like her get divorced by her husband? Is she too strong for him? Does she constantly emasculate him during sex? Was he a cheating bastard? Is SHE the cheating bastard? Wait a minute, did I just call her beautiful?

"Ka-kashi sen-sei.." she mutters inaudibly.

"Who?" Gin asks, unable to comprehend her at first.

"Kakashi-sensei.. why are you wearing.. that ugly yukata?" she snickers weakly and her face softens, revealing such beauty he never expected to see.

"Oy-oy!" he stutters, "This yukata is iconic, okay? My fans love this! And who's Bakashi? There's no character here named Bakashi!" This doesn't look good, Gin thought. Maybe she's already hallucinating from all that alcohol.

"Kakashi-sensei.. your hair looks funny," she speaks again in a tone bordering sleepy and seductive. "I wish I got those silver strands instead--"

"What the hell are you talking about? Are you high, woman? Oy! Oy!"

She closes her eyes and suddenly dozed off, unable to be woken up even with the repeated slaps he sent across her face. The alcohol, or whatever she's at, must have finally knocked her out. His head hurts after all these ruckus she caused him but at the end, Gin can't help but notice how peaceful she looks when she's asleep.

He wonders what her name could be.

***

A/N: This crossover was heavily influenced by this fanart of Gin-san & Sakura-chan casually chatting about their “daughters” in a random cafe. I love it.

Tbh, this could be just this, but if you want more, please let me know. :)

#gintoki #sakura #sakata gintoki #haruno sakura #and a dash of kakasaku #crossoverfic #ginsaku

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