#I’m a dumbass and bisexual

[jainkoa]

I think you can learn so much about a person based off of their favourite bit of vampire media. I’ll go first mine is What We Do in the Shadows (movie and tv show) and Blade (just the character in general).

[ph1lsimpmcu]

Alright guys, guys, hear me out.

Pirates.

Like, Stephen, before his accident, was a royal doctor and best of the best. Stephen’s most frequent patients were Tony and Pepper because Tony was (is) a reckless doufus and Pepper all the time had to drag him somewhere to patch him up. The couple (yeah they were already a couple before meeting Stephen) were visiting so often that they both started to have a crush on a certain badass, handsome, snarky royal doctor (who wouldn't?).

(Tony and Pepper, like 100%, had nights where they were squealing into pillows, babbling about how perfect Stephen was, and telling Rhodey how badass and cool Stephen was. And yea, Rhodey is their therapist and adviser on how to woo Stephen into a relationship and, hopefully, their bed.)

But then Stephen’s accident happened, he left, became a sorcerer, and started to travel and sail across the world. After Stephen left, “civil war” happened, Tony and Pepper left and became pirates.

And so, many years later, Pepper and Tony hear about some wizard who tried, with his “evil” tricks, to get his place as a royal doctor back but failed. Rumors say that the wizard is sailing across the sea and the couple decides that they would like to pay a “visit” (kidnap him *cough*) to their doctor, especially since their crew needs a doctor.

In Stephen’s doctor days, he didn't really remember them, all he remembered was a very annoying couple that visited him too often. But when the said pair kidnapped him, well, it's not like he has a chance to say no because 1. They'll just put him in a cage or something and he would rather prefer to patch up a couple of people and a normal room than to sit in a cage and rot. 2. His past crew was boring and he wanted some adventures because in his doctor days, the pair was known for their tendency to attract trouble. 3. From what he remembered, they weren't bad people and they didn't like violence (if there was a peaceful way). Also, the fact that Tony was the captain of this ship and Pepper was his right hand, he would be relatively fine. 4. Tony and Pepper (from his previous interaction where they attacked his previous crew) became absolutely different people, that were worth his time. The pair was absolutely in their element, from being awkward and awestruck, they became badass and snarky, commanding and snarking at everyone on this ship.

So Stephen decided to hang around for some time, but before, he made sure that everyone treated him respectfully by leaving the captain and his right hand awestruck. (the truth is, the couple didn't really change, they were always like this. On people they were in their “persona”, with someone who they could trust they were adorable gremlins. Stephen never really bothered to look at them when they were working, not sitting in his workroom and awkwardly joking.) Tony and Pepper remembered their days before becoming pirates and Rhodey started to suffer again ( yes Rhodey is with them whenever he can go sailing with them).

(after such a long time of simping, Stephen was devoured ;) ).

[okcoolthanks]

I drew the William guy from Podcast

[monstersandmaw]

Adam ‘head empty pretty eyes only’ Trevelyan boldly flirts with Cassandra…

[matoitech]

the unfortunate thing abt pride month is its when u have to see even more ‘it’s bisexual but BETTER!’ label flags

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

brainwave is realizing Lonan is NOT the fallen angel (Harrison is)

[honeybunted]

More pride flag edits! I might have posted some of these before, I haven’t gotten around to sorting them properly yet, as there are ~300 to go through and put in folders and such. Feel free to use these for whatever!

[miedthessnake]

bro I got my hair cut on friday (it’s now wednesday), and I just realized it.

I GOT THE BI BOB

(how did I not figure this out sooner???)

[cloud-based-and-rainpilled]

i become gayer the more inhebriated i get so mayhaps it’s proof i make no good jdugmenr when i’m pussy drunk

[transgendercastiel]

I really had Frank ocean and Billy ocean confused all this time…

[crazybifansie]

I feel like such an idiot right now.

so I’m at a cafe and a waitress came up to me and was like “oh would you like a refill?” And like if I liked the food. And then she asked “what did you have?” And my dumbass thought she meant what I’d eaten. So I said “oh I just had a sandwich!” And she looked at me like I had a mushroom on my head and was like “I meant what was your drink..” and uhh I just fvucking died

[ghostly-bugs]

Okay so I wanted to post and this is my official first post yippppppppe also have my persona ghost and now have my silly info as well.

[ricearicema]

A girl asked me if I was straight and I forgot the word for bi briefly so I said “no I’m both” and held up a peace sign

[lisacameron99]

JJ x Routledge!Reader - Stranger (not proofed)

Warnings: angst but happy ending, aftermath of JJ getting into a fight, heartbroken reader and JJ, Kiera is bisexual

“Now you’re just a stranger I know everything about.” As you finished singing the song, your friends applauded, making you jump. “I didn’t know yall were there.” You said timidly, putting down Kie’s ukelele.

“You’re so talented!” Sarah told you, beaming. You spared a glance at JJ before pushing yourself up.

“Yeah, well, I don’t sing or play often anymore.”

You left your friends out by the fire pit and made your way inside the chateau. You flopped onto your bed, staring at the ceiling.

“Hey,” John B knocked on the door. You didn’t acknowledge him. You knew what he was going to say and you knew it would piss you off. “We miss you.”

Now that, you really weren’t expecting.

“Kie told me that if J and ever got together and broke up, not to keep coming around. No progue on progue macking.”

“So that means you can’t hang out with the rest of us?”

“It’s easier if I don’t see him.”

“You’re so stupid.” John B laughed at me. “You think you can just worn your way into their lives, make your presence more in my life, and just leave? You’re so full of shit.”

“Excuse me?” You demanded, put off by your brother’s opinion.

“You matter, dumbass.” He exploded. “You matter to all of us, and you not being around has a toll on all of us. So you need to figure out how the fuck go put this behind you and get back to the group.”

After John B left, you found yourself staring at a photo of you and JJ. It was one of the few that you had. You were happy, having just gotten back from being stuck on the island. It was from a kegger you and JB had put on. You had JJ’s hat on and one of his old flannels and a random tank top and shorts. JJ was wearing his usual cut of tank top and a pair of cargo shorts. You both were holding red solo cups, yours in the air, JJ’s in his hand. JJ had his free hand wrapped around you, hugging you tightly to his side. You had been talking aimlessly about God knows what, but you both had wide smiles on your face and hadn’t noticed Pope snap the photo.

“That one’s a good one.” Pope said, standing next to the bed where you sat holding the photo tightly. You stayed silent. “That night was good, one of the last good nights before…” he trailed off. Before JJ and I broke up.

“What’s up,” you said softly, clearing your voice.

“Well, I need help running errands. You in? Fifty bucks for the day.” You couldn’t say no to that type of cash, and Pope knew it.

“Yeah, let me change okay?” Pope left and you quickly changed into a ratty old T-shirt and a pair of jean shorts before heading out to go with Pope.

“You could tell him you still love him.”

“Pope…”

“Oh don’t pull that bullshit with me, Y/N.” He said from his car. “You still do, and that whole thing with Kiera is done now. She’s with Alison anyways.”

“It’s hard to believe he even wants to be around me.” You mumbled, watching the ocean go by.

“Well, he does.” It was silent after that. You and Pope made your deliveries and went back to the chateau.

“It feels like he’s just a stranger I know everything about.”

When you went in, you noticed JJ leaning against the counter, cleaning his hand.

“JJ, what the hell, man?” Pope asked, looking him over.

“It’s nothing.” He mumbled, still fuming.

Oh, but it was something. Whether he was fighting with Topper or Rafe, having his dad beat the shit out of him, or fighting some other Kook, it was always something.

“You got this?” Pope whispered. “I need to go pick Cleo up.”

You nodded hesitantly. And with that, Pope left.

You walked into the bathroom, going straight for the first aid kit. “J, get in here.” You demanded from the bathroom. When you didn’t hear JJ coming, you stormed into the living room. “I wasn’t joking, get your ass in here.” You noticed his eye was split and sighed.

“You don’t need to do this. I can talk care of myself.” He snapped, harsher than you knew he intended.

“Well, I’m going to do this so get in here before it gets infected.”

“Why?” He demanded, setting down the towel he was using to clean his hand.

“Do you always have to be so fucking difficult?” You snapped, losing your cool.

“I’m difficult? Have you met yourself?” JJ stared at you dead in the face. He was trying to get a rise out of you. You knew this.

“I have, for 19 years JJ. And I know I am; but I’m trying to help you right now, so please let me know —” he stalked over to you and you backed against the wall. “What are you doing?” You asked in a shaky voice.

“I’m trying to stay calm,” he heaved out a breath and you felt your core throb. You hadn’t been this close to each other in weeks.

“I,” you breathed.

“Tell me it’s not too late,” JJ whispered and this time, it was your heart that throbbed.

“You know it’s not.” You croaked out.

“Good.” He rested his forehead against yours. “Good.”

You stayed like that for at least ten minutes, heads pressed against each other and just breathing.

You broke the silence. “Can I clean you up now?” You asked.

JJ laughed, letting you lead him into the bathroom.

After cleaning up his eye and hand, you stayed seated on the counter.

JJ moved a piece of hair behind your ear and rubbed back and forth across your cheek. Your hand rested on top of his. Your leg wrapped against his and you pulled him to you. His breath fanned your face and you felt yourself melt into him.

When his mouth finally landed on yours, the groan you both let out was more than either of you realized. JJ pulled you closer so your fronts were together. You panted when he pulled away, but you pulled him back to you joining your mouths again. His tongue worked its way into your mouth, and his hand tightened around the back of your neck. The whimper you let out was pathetic, but so necessary.

When you pulled back, you were panting hard.

“So, safe to say we still got it?” JJ asked, and you smacked his shoulder before he dragged your mouth back to his.

[padfoot-lupin77]

I know this is a kinda specific request but I’m sure some of the lovely dbda fabfic writers (fanfictioners??) has written something similar (if not I might attempt to write it myself) where after they’re back to London, some ghost boy is flirting with Edwin and Charles is sooo jealous but still doesn’t realize he’s in love with Edwin so he goes to Crystal and is like “I’m a horrible person because I get upset every time Edwin shows interest to someone else it’s like I want all his attention on me” and Crystal, who clocked Charles’ bisexuality from the first moment, is like “yeah good job realizing that, why do you think that is?” And Charles goes “because I’m an attention seeker and a bad friend” and Crystal is like you fucking dumbass but still tries to help and she realizes maybe Charles doesn’t know that bisexuality is a thing (spoiler: he really doesn’t know) and Crystal’s like ok you know what we’re going on a walk you need fresh air and on the walk she brings up some girl she used to have a crush on years ago and Charles goes “wait what? Like, crush crush?” And Crystal explains to him that it’s a thing you know, you can like both boys and girls and Charles is having a bit of an identity crisis and later that day Charles bursts into Crystal’s room shouting “SO WE HAVE AN ISSUE” to which Crystal replies with the infamous “you have an issue, I have an idiot, but go on.” And Charles goes “I’m in love with Edwin” and Crystal is like Omg Finally my dumbasses have realized they’re in love!!! Now go tell him you idiot what are you waiting for??? And Charles does tell Edwin who is shocked obvi cause he didn’t think Charles could ever like him back romantically but he does!! and so now Payneland endgame and Niko in her igloo receives a message from Crystal going GUESS WHAT

[calliesmemes]

YET ANOTHER ROUNDUP OF ASOLUTELY UNHINGED COMEDIC RELIEF

ASSORTED SENTENCE STARTERS FROM AROUND THE INTERNET, including quotes from Tumblr, Pinterest, TikTok, and X (formerly known as Twitter), for when a muse wants to be a bit silly <333

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

❛ I am not merely a clown; I’m the entire damn circus! ❜

❛ I will bite you if you continue this behavior. ❜

❛ Being a dramatic ass bitch isn’t a personality trait; it’s a lifestyle! ❜

❛ Trauma? Oh … you mean, my lore? ❜

❛ why must I cite sources? is it not enough to just say ‘trust me, bro’? ❜

❛ sorry for being a perfect sweetie and a genius it will likely happen again. ❜

❛ forget about touching grass; I need to touch WATER I NEED TO GO INTO THE OCEAN I NEED TO DIVE INTO THE SEA!!! ❜

❛ I’m attracted to men with muppet energy and no i will not be explaining. ❜

❛ you want me to make friends with people? the thing that killed julius caesar? ❜

❛ what’s your birthstone? mine is rock bottom. ❜

❛ I absolutely hate that I’m not bioluminescent. Pathetic. ❜

❛ ohhhhh my god i have got to stop mourning the past or whatever. ❜

❛ you expect me to act like a normal human being? I’m wearing a turtleneck! ❜

❛ i don’t struggle with same sex attraction I’m actually very good at it. ❜

❛ unfortunately i often find out without even getting the chance to fuck around. ❜

❛ I’m bisexual which means that I’m attracted to anybody who can defeat me in physical combat. ❜

❛ all anyone needs to know about me is that i’m a dumbass and i love women. ❜

❛ sorry but philosophers aren’t impressive i came up with stuff like that when i was 12. ❜

❛ I pay my own bills; I can cuss all I want! ❜

❛ I don’t have rizz; I have sad eyes and a weird presence. ❜

❛ my demons are chasing me and they’re doing the Naruto run. ❜

❛ honey we are ALL doomed by the narrative. it's not that serious. have some fun with it. ❜

❛ dating me is like interviewing a psych ward patient. ❜

❛ being a girl with very large brown eyes comes with great responsibility. ❜

❛ i’m autistic in ways that you can’t even begin to imagine. ❜

❛ being a loser may be a phase to you but its a lifestyle for me. ❜

❛ entering a magical portal in the woods would fix me. ❜

❛ I’m lonely but not in a hot mysterious way; more like in a pathetic way. ❜

❛ life is so unserious just say womp womp and move on! ❜

❛ you’re vibing? In this economy? ❜

❛ just because I’m small doesn’t mean I can’t kick your ass. ❜

❛ my primary motivators are fear, spite, and aesthetic longing. ❜

❛ sorry about the chaos; I needed attention. ❜

❛ WHAT IS UP GIRL you look foreboding and malicious! ❜

❛ baby i can be your problematic bi wife. ❜

❛ i don’t think any of you understand how important i am to the plot. ❜

❛ what if we are both red flags? what then? ❜

❛ any dream can be a prophetic dream if you’re willing to do some really weird shit. ❜

❛ my hobbies include being right, being gay, and being a hater. ❜

❛ i have a phd in Loving The Color Pink And Also Glitter. ❜

❛ being a menace to society is a full time job and I am dedicated. ❜

❛ my life has been a bouquet of oopsie daisies. ❜

❛ i survive on spite, anxiety, and blasphemy. ❜

❛ if you’re not obsessed with me, why would I wanna be with you? ❜

❛ the hottest thing a man can be is a little afraid of me. ❜

❛ my love language is being a hater. ❜

❛ i don’t get enough credit for acting far less insane than i actually am. ❜

❛ the A in my name stands for always right. ❜

❛ Jesus is my homeboy but God has a lot to answer for and I will continue to be rebellious until he does so. ❜

❛ I’ll see a man with long hair and then remember that I’m not above temptations of the flesh. ❜

❛ i’m going to be honest with you I’m not going to be honest with you. ❜

❛ stop asking me if I’m ok I’ll literally make out with you. ❜

❛ part of my masculine charm is that I’m literally insane. ❜

❛ are you sure those are demons bro? or are they consequences from the choices you made? ❜

❛ i do not identify as a boy or a girl. i identify as a nuisance, an irritant, a fool, and a problem. ❜

❛ praying on someone’s downfall isn’t enough i need to participate in it. ❜

❛ we all need to chill. i won’t do it first but it’s something i noticed. ❜

❛ not to sound like a Victorian woman suffering from hysteria but going to the sea would fix me. ❜

❛ the silly goose convention called; they asked if you could be their keynote speaker. ❜

❛ i deserve unrestricted access to old castles and old churches i want to know all the secrets. ❜

❛ doesn’t matter if you’re cringe or based we’re all just here to suffer. ❜

❛ I’m no longer comedic relief I’m now serious panic. ❜

❛ this is getting difficult to romanticize. ❜

❛ done healing my inner child. next up is my inner teen. her highness needs a sword. ❜

❛ i am God’s silliest experiment. ❜

❛ i’m very vulnerable right now if anyone wants to take advantage of me. ❜

❛ sorry i overshared do you still think im hot? ❜

❛ I can yap for days and still maintain my air of mystery. ❜

❛ good luck sending me mixed signals; I don’t even understand normal ones. ❜

❛ not all of your life decisions have to be smart. some can be purely for cinematic value. ❜