#I’ll try to write and be more active but I can’t guarantee it

[grumpypixistix]

Oh my god, so much has happened over the past few months- I’m so sorry for the inactivity 😭😭😭

Also I probably won’t be writing about Eddie as much, maybe expect some Miguel O’Hara stuff here and there? It all depends on when I feel the motivation to write sooo… just a heads up 😅

[ave-cave]

In Defense/Analysis of Mahiru and Hiyoko's Relationship

Criticisms leveled at Hiyoko’s relationship with Mahiru are varied; engaging with the fanbase for this long has led me to some pretty specific ones, many I’d never even thought about (and that’s saying something because I spend way too much time analyzing them lmao). In the interest of not making this a novel, though, I’ll be focusing on the ones I see most often: “Mahiru didn't call Hiyoko out on her bullying,” “Mahiru standing up for Hiyoko in 2-2 was hypocritical” and “Mahiru and Hiyoko's relationship is wasted potential because Hiyoko dies in 2-3.”

As can probably be inferred from the title, this write-up aims to counter these criticisms, but if I’m being honest, it doubles as an attempt to explain why I like Mahiru and Hiyoko's dynamic as much as I do. They’re my favorites in the series bar none, so there’s no guarantee my points will be 100% free of bias, but I’ll do my best to consider each argument in good faith.

A few disclaimers first:

Spoilers for basically all of Goodbye Despair are incoming (if that wasn’t obvious lol)

All pink highlighted text is a link to a relevant Imgur image

Defending a character’s writing and defending their morality are two different things, and I intend to do only the former, especially with Hiyoko

It's more than fine if you dislike Mahiru or Hiyoko – this write-up wouldn’t exist if differing opinions didn’t – but please do try to approach my points with an open mind

Cool? Cool.

Turning a Blind Eye:

First thing’s first, the aspect of Mahiru and Hiyoko's relationship that I assume most earns Mahiru the “hypocrite” title: her ignoring Hiyoko’s bullying.

At a glance, I can’t say this criticism rings untrue. During my first playthrough, I also found myself agitated (and frankly confused) by how Hiyoko’s ill treatment (of everyone, but of Mikan in particular) kept flying under the radar. That said, upon review, I wouldn’t consider it a glaring oversight on the part of the writers the way some fans seem to; I think her behavior is handled as such by the narrative for a reason – albeit a frustrating one – and that this reason is key to understanding her relationship with Mahiru.

When it comes to the class as a whole, the most straightforward reason is that it’s rendered trivial by the killing game. In the midst of life or death, a pipsqueak tossing around juvenile insults is lucky to register as any kind of concern, let alone an urgent one – this made all the more apparent when you comb through her insult scenes and realize that most of them follow the same formula: jab → target’s reaction → another character rerouting the conversation to focus on the dangers at hand. Something similar can be said for why Teruteru’s sexual harassment and Kazuichi’s overstepping of Sonia’s boundaries are ignored in favor of continuing class-wide discussions (and on a more inoffensive note why comic relief moments, courtesy of Ibuki or Gundham, are so fleeting): the threat of the killing game overshadows all else. Only when a threat within the group becomes synonymous with the killing game is it addressed with nearly the same exigency (think Nagito post-chapter 1), otherwise, it might as well be nonexistent.

So basically, when forced to pick and choose what harm they respond to, more often than not the class opts for the harm that jumps out at them screaming “I’M HARMFUL.” If Hiyoko’s insults were the long and short of it, her conduct would be essentially harmless; rude at best and borderline malicious at worst, but overall inconsequential. Except that’s not the case. Why? Because two characters in particular – Mikan and Kazuichi – lack the self-esteem to brush them off as childish drivel. Through this, they become prime targets, and general unpleasantness gives way to full-on bullying…

… whiiich brings us to pitfall #2: while the other characters aren’t oblivious to Mikan and Kazuichi’s sensitivity per se, they aren’t actively mindful of it, either – especially not Mikan’s. They treat them either like any other classmate or – when their talents come in handy – like competent Ultimates. In most instances where Mikan breaks down (pre-trial 3 anyway), Hajime’s internal dialogue is something along the lines of, “She doesn’t need to cry and apologize so much” rather than, “Oh no, is she okay?” He’s concerned, just not enough to adjust his approach. The same goes for Kazuichi, particularly when his sensitivity causes him to freak out, giving the impression of cowardice. Ironically, by choosing those two as her main targets, Hiyoko may be the only person who “acknowledges” their low self-esteem as anything worth treating them differently over (though that’s obviously not to her credit since it’s in the most twisted way possible).

Of course, just off the top of my head, I can recall more instances of the perverted characters’ comments being called out than I can Hiyoko's, but I wouldn’t consider that an oversight, either. I’ve seen it argued that simply being childish is what gives Hiyoko a “pass” behavior-wise, and while I don’t think this is incorrect, I think it underestimates just how aware she is of the way she’s perceived, i.e., as younger (both physically and mentally) than her classmates. She doesn’t act the way she does and then expect her childlike image to compensate for it automatically; she’s in a constant, deliberate flip-flop between unapproachable and childish, because – while she is a paranoid individual who puts forth her assholish personality to avoid forming connections and facing betrayal – she’s also someone who likes to have her cake and eat it, too.

In her mind, so long as she can be simultaneously unlikable and unthreatening, she needn't fear going too far and making enemies (as opposed to just, y’know, not making friends), and to that end, she turns to her immature looks as a sort of “back-up” – a way of being avoided without being antagonized. This tactic, hinted at a few times in DR2 as well as other canon material, backfires, however, highlighting its fundamental flaw: sure, no one takes her seriously enough to get mad at her insults, but by the same token, no one takes her seriously in general – not even when she wants them to.

That’s not to say this concept is executed perfectly, mind you. As interesting as it may be on paper, even I have trouble suspending my disbelief in scenes where she’s downright cruel and yet no one bats an eye. I think there’s just enough (both in text and subtext) to justify her in-universe perception being what it is, so I can get past this, but I understand why some fans can’t – especially since Mikan and Kazuichi get the short end of the stick regardless.

Again, though, that’s the class as a whole. What about Mahiru specifically? From what I've seen, she’s frequently singled out by the fandom as the character most to blame for Hiyoko’s behavior going unchecked, and this is probably due to a few things:

Her emphasis on good manners and civility

Her friendship with Hiyoko making her a more responsible party for correcting the latter’s behavior

The opening scene of 2-2 in which she defends Hiyoko (I call it “the restaurant scene” for short because it takes place at the restaurant and I’m uncreative)

The second and third reasons go hand-in-hand, but I have a fair amount to say about the third, so I'll save it for the next section. The first and second I'll talk about here.

Hypocrisy is defined as not practicing what one preaches. One could argue that Mahiru employs hypocrisy when she preaches good manners and civility but a) doesn’t call Hiyoko out for being a bully, and b) becomes her friend. Do these arguments hold water? In my opinion, yes and no. Let me explain.

First, how does Hiyoko’s in-universe perception carry over to her relationship with Mahiru? Simply put, Mahiru isn’t immune to it. Like everyone else, she views Hiyoko as too childish to take seriously and dismisses her accordingly. This might seem like a non-starter for their relationship, but I actually think it’s what allows said relationship to work at all.

In terms of personality and values, Mahiru and Hiyoko are polar opposites. You don’t have to search far for evidence of this – it’s right there in their profiles, with Mahiru’s stating that she dislikes bad manners and Hiyoko’s that she dislikes being lectured. This contrast isn’t arbitrary. Far from it; it’s deliberate groundwork for a foil. Unlike most foil characters in the series, though, Mahiru and Hiyoko get along swimmingly. Why? Well, I’ll get more into the nitty-gritty of that later, but in short, it’s because – while Mahiru may not be immune to Hiyoko’s flip-flopping – her perception isn’t quite as limited by it as her peers’.

I've seen a few people claim that Hiyoko is “fawned over” by her classmates, but IMO, that's not really true. Instances of the others offering Hiyoko comfort/sympathy are pretty much exclusive to the second trial (after her name is cleared; before that they're slinging accusations at her left and right) and the scene where they discover her shrine (after Chiaki sheds light on its true purpose; before that they're rallying to burn it). In both, I think it's made fairly clear that they're doing it out of a sense of, “Wow, this killing game sucks and Hiyoko is kind of bearing the brunt of its terribleness right now,” not, “Wow, Hiyoko is so cute and precious.” That's nothing particular to her; every character who loses a loved one to the killing game is treated with some amount of tenderness afterwards, regardless of who they are or whether the loss is the result of their own actions. Where her Mahiru-related suffering isn't concerned, though, Hiyoko’s classmates more or less just tolerate her existence. They go, “Hey, there's the rude little girl we for some reason share a grade with” and continue about the island.

Of course, it’s no one's responsibility to parent their peer, and Hiyoko's other classmates aren't wrong for taking her at face value. But Mahiru is different; she takes responsibility for those around her whether they want her to or not. Her desire to bring out the best in others is what allows her to perceive Hiyoko as a child not just in temperament, but in impressionability, too. In other words, she’s the only one who sees potential in Hiyoko – with a nudge in the right direction – to mature and improve as a person. This is demonstrated when Hiyoko admits the reason behind her smell at the start of 2-2. Here, Mahiru doesn't join her peers in asking why a high schooler can't do something as simple as bathe, nor does she slap a band-aid on the problem and offer to tie Hiyoko’s kimono for her; she offers to teach her how to do it herself. If Hiyoko were a plain bully with zero (for lack of a better word) embellishments – if there was nothing to bridge the gap between her and Mahiru, like, say, a need for a role model – Mahiru would be more inclined to call her out, yes, but she’d also be less inclined to help her here. And in my opinion? This would hurt both of their characters in the long run. I’ll get to why in the last section.

Granted, this then begs the question: if Mahiru is the only one generous enough to believe Hiyoko can change for the better, why does she demonstrate this generosity only once, in a situation where Hiyoko is vulnerable rather than on the offense no less? Well, I don't think that's an arbitrary decision, either.

See, while it might not be a stretch to call Mahiru and Hiyoko “friends” from the POV of the entire Class 77B saga, in DR2 alone, it kind of is. Hiyoko’s quick and fervent attachment to Mahiru beginning with the restaurant scene can make it easy to forget that, all told, their relationship on the island spanned only three days. Moreover, the attachment was one-sided; Mahiru was surprised and somewhat exasperated by Hiyoko's clinginess, and while she didn’t outright reject her affections, reciprocating them came very much second to unraveling the secrets of the island – especially once the second motive was introduced.

Hell, eliminate the restaurant scene altogether and only two interactions between them remain: first an optional dialogue in which Mahiru lets Hiyoko drag her to the supermarket but warns that she’s busy and can’t spend too much time with her, then the off-screen meeting that we piece together in 2-2’s Closing Argument. But even following the restaurant scene – arguably the only one in which Mahiru is focused exclusively on Hiyoko – she shows reluctance to help Hiyoko shower and redress right away, considering the upcoming investigation a bigger priority. The morning after, although Hiyoko is still clinging to her, Mahiru doesn't acknowledge her at any point, focused instead on forcing Nekomaru and Kazuichi to give up Nagito’s location. Starting to notice a pattern?

Additionally, in the prologue, Mahiru joins the beach party while Hiyoko doesn’t. The first morning of the killing game (also Hiyoko’s first Mikan-bullying scene), Mahiru is away almost the entire time fetching Kazuichi. During the first investigation, Mahiru stays by the Imposter’s body while Hiyoko goes to the supermarket. A couple mornings later, Mahiru doesn’t come to breakfast at all while Hiyoko does. This leaves only a handful of Monokuma announcements, two investigations, a trial (that is, killing game-related things that everyone has to gather in one place for anyway) and a few other misc. scenes, most of which are devoid of interactions between the two. So in other words, the amount of time they spend in each other’s presence is just as scant as their “bonding” moments.

None of this is to diminish the ultimate impact of their relationship (I’m working up to that slowly if you couldn’t tell lol), but it is to say that describing them as “friends” within the confines of DR2 is maybe pushing it. I may refer to them as such in write-ups (half for the sake of brevity and half because Danganronpa presents friend as a generic term for harmony within the group), but in fact, the only time Mahiru or Hiyoko is called the other’s friend is in 2-3, when Chiaki prompts Hiyoko to consider what Mahiru would say about Fuyuhiko’s seppuku. Chiaki is well-meaning, and while her observations about her classmates aren't off the mark per se, they're sometimes lacking in nuance – likely by virtue of her being an AI with a limited framework for understanding people. We as players, on the other hand, can be a bit more discerning: there was a single scene in which Mahiru was focused on Hiyoko and Hiyoko only, and by the time it was over, she’d already shifted her attention back to the killing game. Two days later, she died. I’d be concerned if anyone besides Chiaki called that friendship.

Consider Fuyuhiko for a moment. The fact that Mahiru has basically double the interactions with him than she does Hiyoko, even prior to the events of the second case, is an immediate tip-off that Hiyoko isn't her prime concern. She’s on positive terms with Hiyoko, whereas she and Fuyuhiko butt heads constantly, so it should be the other way around, right? Nope. Fuyuhiko represents a threat synonymous with the killing game due to his threats of continuing it (plus his overall lack of cooperation), and so reining him in is automatically higher on her list of priorities.

And that's the thing: despite being a grade-a cunt, Hiyoko is cooperative. She doesn’t create rifts within the group the way Fuyuhiko does pre-trial 2, let alone entertain the idea of the killing game. She doesn’t try to distance herself from her peers, and while she might not be very useful in investigations, she doesn’t outright refuse to partake in them (she goes to the supermarket for snacks instead of investigating, but she's willing to help Hajime confirm important items are missing from the shelves.) Working against the killing game in any way – including just by cooperating – is an immediate incentive for Mahiru to go easier on anyone (yes, even boys). This, coupled with the aforementioned flip-flopping effect, makes it so Hiyoko only shows up on her radar when she starts crying over her kimono in 2-2, whereas Fuyuhiko shows up the moment he starts threatening to kill someone.

Due to her early death and the fact that – again – she shares so few scenes with Hiyoko to begin with, the number of times Mahiru witnesses the latter bullying Mikan is a comparatively small five: three times in the first trial (one of which is during a Nonstop Debate), once the morning after the trial and once while investigating the abandoned ruins. 

During the first trial, Mahiru is among the students most focused on solving the murder, and only when liabilities to the group’s cooperation (i.e., Fuyuhiko still threatening people, Kazuichi and Nekomaru embarrassing Peko and derailing the discussion about her alibi) does she feel the need to police anyone's behavior. Hiyoko is a complete and utter bitch to Mikan here, but given her remarks don't noticeably hamper the discussion, it's unfortunately not hard to see why everyone – Mahiru included – dismisses them as playground nonsense.

Likewise, during the second island investigation, Mahiru is fully immersed in the conversation about the ruins and pays no attention to anything besides it, not even Hiyoko mentioning that they bathed together (something she'd previously expressed embarrassment over). The morning after the trial is definitely the odd one out; Mahiru is distraught over the Imposter and Teruteru, but there’s nothing more pressing to attend to, and reprimanding Hiyoko would cost her little in the focus department. Like the others, she just doesn't take it seriously. Is her lack of intervention here unjustified? For sure. Is she more at fault for not stepping in than anyone else? I'd argue no.

Kazuichi is a similar case. Mahiru is there for four of the scenes in which he’s bullied: once before the Imposter’s first meeting, twice while investigating the park’s giant timer and once during the first trial. Everything I said about Mikan applies here as well, but there’s the added layer that Mahiru is harder on boys, and so when Hiyoko calls Kazuichi a coward for trying to run away or a loser for insulting others to gain Sonia’s favor, Mahiru may not agree with the form, but she might as well agree with the content. Again, does that make her silence right? No. Just explainable.

All in all, what I’m getting at is that Mahiru’s role modeling (in DR2’s main story anyway) isn’t supposed to extend beyond the restaurant scene. At no point in 2-2 is correcting Hiyoko’s behavior a consistent goal for her, and while I think it's 100% fair to argue that it should've been, I only half-agree – again, for reasons I'll get to in section three. Since I’m not sure I can explain the purpose of Mahiru's guidance in DR2 without repeating myself in the future, for now I’ll just highlight what it aims to achieve in other installments.

Granted, most spin-off interactions are one-on-one, meaning only the TSMC and DRS exist to show how Mahiru responds to Hiyoko’s bullying in a non-killing game setting. I’d argue that neither disappoints, however; she’s shown more than once to instruct Hiyoko on how to act in both. What I like about this portrayal is that Mahiru’s gentle approach stays the same; only the sense of urgency with which she addresses Hiyoko’s behavior changes. As far as she's concerned, Hiyoko is still a child in need of teaching, but now – with the stakes that much lower – she’s also evidently a bully in need of reining in.

These scenes make Mahiru one of few characters to try to temper Hiyoko’s cruelty at any point in the series. You know who doesn’t ever try, not even outside of the killing game? Most of the DR2 cast, who end up witnessing far more frequent and targeted bullying than Mahiru does simply by virtue of outliving her. These characters include:

the self-appointed leader of the group who either ignores Hiyoko’s comments or finds the ones directed at him funny

the protagonist of the game whose inner monologue consistently acknowledges how terrible Hiyoko’s behavior is, but never calls it out

the Ultimate Team Manager (who also plays along with insults directed at him) and Princess, whose talents center around order and unity

the Observer AI whose #1 objective is ensuring that everyone gets along no matter what

Of course, how much incentive and/or know-how someone has for stopping a bully is unimportant when a simple “cut it out” would suffice. At the end of the day, the fact remains that everyone – Mahiru included – turned a blind eye to bullying during the killing game, and there’s no good excuse for that. My aim in pointing this out is not to absolve Mahiru altogether, rather, to put into perspective why it may be unfair to saddle her with all, let alone most of the blame.

So at last, with all of that explanation out of the way, is Mahiru a hypocrite when it comes to her handling of Hiyoko vs. others? Well, sure. She’s hypocritical in the sense that she exercises a double standard, i.e., cuts Hiyoko more slack than she does the rest of the class. But is that double standard exclusive to her? Not really. If anything, by not dismissing her as a child through and through, she holds Hiyoko to a higher standard than most of her classmates do, and this gets its proper chance to shine outside of the killing game. Moreover, her double standard isn’t the product of favoritism; on the contrary, if guiding Hiyoko took precedence over the killing game in her mind, their interactions wouldn’t be so few and far between. Calling Hiyoko out isn’t one of her priorities, but neither is being her friend.

In light of this, I think a better question is whether Mahiru’s hypocrisy is conscious or not. Conscious hypocrisy applies when someone regards two or more things as being on the same level but treats one differently anyway. That isn’t the case with Mahiru, who – alongside her peers – treats Hiyoko’s behavior differently (i.e., more leniently) because she genuinely regards it as nickel-and-dime. If you’d still consider that unconscious hypocrisy, that’s fair. Again, I just don’t think there’s any point in singling her out.

Speaking of singling out…

The Restaurant Scene:

The opening scene of 2-2 wherein Mahiru and Hiyoko become “friends” is where I’ve noticed a lot of fans’ ire with their relationship comes from. It’s a fairly popular opinion (as far as I’m aware) to consider Mahiru’s defense of Hiyoko here hypocritical, and honestly? While I disagree, I don’t really blame people for seeing it that way. I had to give her actions some extra thought before they started making sense to me, and I think the scene as a whole requires a lot of reading in between the lines + background knowledge to make heads or tails of. Here’s my personal reading of it and why I’d consider it misunderstood.

Immediately upon entering the restaurant, the brooding atmosphere hits hard; everyone* is in silent mourning of the Imposter and Teruteru, too overwhelmed by the events of the night prior to make conversation. Mahiru is no exception; she can hardly muster a “good morning” to Hajime… 

… *everyone besides Hiyoko, that is. Just as immediately, she starts badmouthing Teruteru, claiming he deserved to die for his crime and therefore shouldn't be mourned. Cue record scratch.

What does Mahiru say in response to this? Nothing. But her silence isn’t for lack of caring – quite the opposite.

See, the crucial thing to understand about Mahiru (and probably her most glaring flaw) is that, despite her headstrong attitude and emphasis on “doing the right thing,” she doesn’t always know what the right thing is. She lacks the confidence necessary to support her levelheadedness, and so she agonizes and deliberates. This is the driving force behind most of her actions, and I think the restaurant scene serves to foreshadow its role in her final confrontation with Fuyuhiko.

Think about the things Mahiru jumps down her peers’ throats about: all relatively “simple” moral dilemmas concerning impropriety, threats, reckless decision-making, etc. Then compare all of that to the dilemma Hiyoko brings into question here. Do the ends justify the means when it comes to reuniting with family? Is trading the lives of 15 strangers for one important person right? Mahiru doesn’t know; she’s never had to think about it before. Even if she disagrees on principle, who is she to tell this girl she barely knows that she shouldn’t feel relief over the death of someone who tried to get them all executed? Only later, after having given it ample thought, does she come to terms with this dilemma – and in the meantime, Peko steps in, possibly also foreshadowing her familiarity with topics like execution.

Soon thereafter, Hiyoko is identified as the source of a bad smell, and while most of the comments that follow are born of genuine concern for her hygiene, Gundham and Kazuichi’s are a wee bit insensitive. Mahiru says as much in a single line, and here’s where I think some interpretations of the restaurant scene miss the point. Nowhere during this exchange does Mahiru accuse anyone of bullying Hiyoko. The reason she intervenes has everything to do with her flaw regarding moral dilemmas, and – up until her offer to help Hiyoko with her kimono – almost nothing to do with Hiyoko herself. “Is it rude to harp on a sensitive hygiene issue outside of one’s control” is already a dilemma far simpler than “should a murderer be mourned," but the added layer of disregarding a lecture and doing the same thing the next morning makes it a no-brainer. Mahiru doesn’t care that Hiyoko is the target of a few obtuse comments, she cares that the guys didn’t listen to her the night before – something she makes clear by opening her sentence with, “I’ve said it before, but…”

After this is when her intervention starts being about Hiyoko. She says she’ll teach Hiyoko a simple obi knot, and only then does the latter stop crying. Here’s where background knowledge factors in.

Basically, a few in-game clues – combined with her FTEs and Island Mode – reveal that Hiyoko was forced at a young age to leave her parents’ home and move in with her grandmother, who then put her to work studying the traditional dance for which the Saionji Clan is famous. Hiyoko's status as the next head of the family made her subject to great cruelty at the hands of jealous rivals, and as a result, she grew to resent it. Her grandmother became aware of this resentment, and to prevent Hiyoko from shirking her responsibilities, she spoiled her into total dependence, neglecting to teach her basic life skills – including though not limited to dressing herself – and ensuring that dance was her only area of proficiency. This led to Hiyoko forming an inferiority complex around her lack of self-sustainability.

Said inferiority complex contextualizes how Mahiru’s offer registered to Hiyoko: not as a basic gesture of compassion, but as something far greater. Instead of offering to take care of it for her, Mahiru offered to teach her how to take care of it herself, and this meant that Hiyoko not only automatically trusted her, but had every reason to see her as a role model; as someone whose example could be followed. This childlike admiration becomes all the more relevant later.

Honestly, as much as I understand criticisms of the restaurant scene from a, “Mahiru should have also defended Mikan/Kazuichi” standpoint, I do less from a, “She shouldn’t have helped Hiyoko” one. I already outlined where I think her blindspots lie in terms of calling Hiyoko out (and how said blindspots aren't unique to her), but of the characters most consistently mindful of Mikan/Kazuichi otherwise, I’d argue she’s up there (although, again, no one is nearly as mindful of them as they should be).

She’s the only person to insist on helping Mikan up after she falls for the first time; she expresses concern over the floorboards in the abandoned building being a tripping hazard for her; she firmly refuses Ibuki’s suggestion of taking pictures after she falls for the second time; she reprimands Fuyuhiko for threatening to sell her to a whorehouse in the first trial; and when Monokuma pressures the class into playing the TSMC arcade game, she warns Mikan against it. Granted, there aren't as many instances of her sticking up for Kazuichi, but it's worth noting that – despite her prior insistence that he needed to “man up” – she defends him when Fuyuhiko taunts him over his fear of the Monobeasts.

Don’t get me wrong, I do wish that she did the additional service of holding Hiyoko accountable for her bullying, but the fact that she didn't doesn't render her intervention here hypocritical, IMO. Again, her defense of Hiyoko was prompted by frustration over the guys embarrassing her after they'd already done the same to Peko; it's something she would have defended any of the girls for, and as highlighted above, she arguably did defend Mikan on the embarrassment front both times she fell.

As for offering Hiyoko help, I don't see how that's hypocritical, either. If this scene is indicative of anything, it's that Hiyoko – while a rotten bully – is still human at the end of the day. The fact that she's a little shit and the fact that she's so helpless she can't get dressed by herself can coexist; offering her the bare minimum compassion for the latter isn't giving her a free ticket to continue being the former – it's just that: the bare minimum compassion. She needed help, and if Mahiru wouldn't give it to her, who would? Maybe it'd be karmic to let her go around the island smelling like sewage, but it sure as hell wouldn't be sustainable.

More than once in her screentime is Mahiru shown to extend compassion to someone who isn’t an unambiguously good person, something else that becomes all the more relevant later. She makes a genuine effort to sympathize with Teruteru’s motive despite not agreeing with his actions; she brings food to a tied-up Nagito (twice, for that matter) despite the chaos he’d sown the previous chapter; and she laments Natsumi’s murder despite knowing how badly the latter treated others, herself included. In view of this, helping a bully dress herself is not only in-character for Mahiru, but by far the least “extreme” of her acts of compassion. I’d also argue that it pays off in a few different ways.

Why I Think it Works:

So far, I’ve offered explanations as to why nothing holds Mahiru and Hiyoko’s relationship back, but I’ve yet to explain what I think pushes it forward. Let me rectify that.

Following the second trial, Hiyoko’s hostility toward those around her is amped up to 11. The third island investigation has her intentionally manipulate Akane into exploring the motel on her behalf, and when Hajime talks to her, not only does she insult him right off the bat, she's openly classist toward him, equating the unsanitary, rundown motel to his house. This is low, even for her, and considering the events of the previous chapter, it’s not exactly a mystery why.

See, Mahiru's death sets itself apart from others in the series in that it isn't an immediate incentive for the person closest to her to change. Hiyoko doesn't get the tried and true “character loses a friend and is motivated to better themselves as a result” type arc – not toot sweet, anyway – because, unlike, say, Sakura, Peko or Tenko, Mahiru had no last words, no last message of strength or wisdom for her. Her murder was a source of conflict and animosity – nothing more, nothing less.

As is first established following Teruteru’s execution, Hiyoko has a retribution-oriented mindset not too far off from Fuyuhiko’s “an eye for an eye.” She doesn't believe in redemption; she holds onto grudges indefinitely; and most of all, she believes killers deserve to die themselves. This mindset is yet another manifestation of her paranoia – of being conditioned all her life to believe that everyone is out to get her. Unlike Fuyuhiko, whose terrible attitude was a mask he wore to compensate for his insecurities about leading his clan, Hiyoko’s is an extension of her paranoid worldview; an ingrained trait.

And that’s honestly why I only half-agree with the argument that Mahiru should have reprimanded her in DR2. Would it have worked to give Mikan/Kazuichi some peace of mind? Absolutely, and that’s reason enough. But to change Hiyoko’s behavior in the long run? I doubt it. It would address the bullying in the moment, but it wouldn’t get to the root of the problem, i.e. the backwards defense mechanism from which said bullying stems. The only reason Mahiru’s guidance outside of DR2 (as underscored earlier) has any effect is that Hiyoko is already in a safe environment with friends whom she trusts, far away from her family and their perilous traditions. Though her lizard brain instinct is still to be as nasty as possible, the proper groundwork is there for her to integrate Mahiru’s guidance and improve her behavior over time… groundwork that's practically nonexistent in DR2’s killing game.

But anyway, back to 2-3. Speaking of Fuyuhiko, Hiyoko applies her rigid point of view to him in this chapter. The fact that she considers him an irredeemable killer is only a sliver of the real issue, however; more relevant is that clear indications of his wanting to turn over a new leaf register to her as a way of dodging responsibility. No matter how sincere in his resolve he may be, she sees only the worst in him. She is, after all, paranoid.

Hiyoko’s shrine, while testament to her love for Mahiru, is kind of a… development red herring so to speak. Setting aside her insecurities to perform a task outside her (forced) field of expertise is a feat for her – don't get me wrong – but it isn't really a change; she’d never hesitated before to show vulnerability when it came to Mahiru, whether by saying to her face that she loved her or expressing how much she missed her when she was gone. It's only when she confronts Fuyuhiko about Mahiru and Peko’s deaths, and he responds by committing seppuku, that we see dynamics start to shift.

Here, Hiyoko is stunned into horrified silence, and that in and of itself speaks volumes. She believes strongly that all killers deserve to die, doesn't she? So then why does she go quiet? Why doesn't she take advantage of Fuyuhiko’s clear instability to get him to finish the job? It’s not because she doesn’t want to die herself; the last trial established beyond a shadow of a doubt that only the person to deliver the killing blow is punished. It's because she realizes something: that isn't what Mahiru would want.

In contrast to both Hiyoko and Fuyuhiko, retribution was never Mahiru's MO. She wished zero harm upon anyone no matter what they'd done; she extended compassion to everyone, even killers; she disapproved of cruel and unusual punishment; and she showed particular distaste for acts of revenge. Of course, in keeping with her fatal flaw, she didn't always go about these ideals in the right way. She covered up a murder in a desperate bid to protect her friend from the yakuza’s twisted “justice,” and she scolded an enraged Fuyuhiko for continuing the cycle of revenge while he was interrogating her about his sister – both shortsighted actions that she paid the ultimate price for.

But by the same token, she kept thinking about Teruteru's actions after the restaurant scene and concluded that he didn’t, in fact, deserve to die for his crime. She forced Nekomaru and Kazuichi to give up Nagito’s location, chastised them for hogtying and starving him and brought him breakfast when nobody else would. She spent days deliberating over how best to make amends with Fuyuhiko, even though his threatening letter – combined with the knowledge of the game’s true ending – would have been more than enough to convince the others to restrain him like Kazuichi wanted (not to mention the most obvious thing to do for her own protection). If she had thought more like Hiyoko and dismissed Fuyuhiko as an irredeemable murderer from the get-go, the opportunity to lure her to the beach house would have never existed.

The ideals driving these actions, made explicit in her final words to Fuyuhiko, all contributed to a lasting legacy, and Hiyoko considering that legacy in order to forgive Fuyuhiko is what makes her arc so powerful to me. Losing the only person on the island whom she trusted – hell, having that trust taken advantage of by the ones responsible – could have foreclosed on all progress right then and there. Mahiru's guidance was limited to a single act of compassion that had (seemingly) nothing to do with what she stood for. Being framed for her murder put Hiyoko in a vulnerable position from which she believed she could only recover by becoming meaner. And as the only one left still personally affected by Fuyuhiko’s actions, she had to watch as everyone else welcomed him back with open arms, causing her to lose last resource: her footing within the group as the rude but cooperative one. But because Mahiru’s compassion reached her in a fundamental way – because she valued her enough to consider her unspoken ideals – she managed to defy the odds and change anyway. Not because Mahiru told her to, but because she wanted to.

And so at last, that's why I think the way their relationship was written – with a brief but meaningful role model dynamic, limited intervention on Mahiru's side and childlike admiration on Hiyoko's – ultimately worked in both of their favors. It allowed Mahiru's impact to carry on past 2-2 (more extensively anyway, as it would have played into Fuyuhiko’s arc regardless; his desire to make amends using the second chance given to him by Peko was no coincidence), and it made it so the sincerity other arcs work hard to convey is there by default with Hiyoko’s – just by virtue of it happening at all. Do I still wish Mahiru called Hiyoko out on her bullying for Mikan and Kazuich’s sakes? Yep. I just wouldn't change her lack of involvement otherwise.

As a side note, it’s also why I can’t get behind the idea that Mahiru ever “enabled” Hiyoko. An enabler is someone who, well, enables something – usually a behavior, right? Remove the enabler from the equation, and the enabled behavior should become harder to maintain. So what would become of Hiyoko if she never “befriended” Mahiru? Well… she’d smell worse. She’d like one fewer person. That’s about it. Not receiving Mahiru’s compassion wouldn’t have done much of anything, but receiving it made a world of difference.

Hell, even if we strip away Mahiru's primary impact on Hiyoko, i.e. jumpstarting her development in 2-3, I’d argue that what we’re left with in 2-2 is still unequivocally positive. Helping Hiyoko shower and tie her kimono were both good things that improved the lives of everyone on the island. Nobody had to deal with Hiyoko’s stench anymore, but on top of that, given the option, Hiyoko spent her time clinging to Mahiru instead of going around bullying others. Keep in mind, Hiyoko is someone who believes she doesn't need friends or close contacts. Before Mahiru, she reasoned that, as long as she could learn to be self-sustaining, she’d never have to rely on anyone who might betray her; she could eschew human connection and ensure her safety forevermore. But then Mahiru earned her trust in one fell swoop, and suddenly she was prioritizing the pursuit of friendship over the prevention of betrayal, if with just one person. I don't think that should be understated.

Sorry, I keep getting sidetracked. Back to 2-3.

True to the killing game, though, just because a character experiences a breakthrough doesn't mean it’s all sunshine and rainbows from that point forward. The objective of the first half of Hiyoko’s arc, i.e., forgiving Fuyuhiko, is complete. She’s already well on her way to vanquishing her paranoia – to having her worldview reformed by Mahiru’s ideals and doing away with her ugly defense mechanism in the process. Nothing can stop her from improving further…

… is what we're led to believe. But then comes Nekomaru’s sacrifice. That’s when things take a nosedive.

Witnessing Nekomaru – essentially the pinnacle of strength – try to save his friend and get demolished as a result reinforces the very paranoia Hiyoko was striving to overcome. It reminds her of her own fragile mortality within the killing game and serves as irrefutable proof – in her mind, anyway – that connection leads only to death. Based on two lines, one from the second trial and the other from Hiyoko’s Island Mode ending, I think it can also be inferred that she projects herself onto Nekomaru here; she wishes she could have protected Mahiru the way Nekomaru tried to do Akane, but the fact that Mahiru is gone, and – as far as she’s aware – Nekomaru is now, too, only further cements her paranoid outlook.

Something else I think is notable about this scene, albeit a minor detail, is how Hiyoko addresses Akane. She singles Akane out, asking if she understands that Nekomaru died on account of their friendship. And while she's obviously rude about it, interestingly enough, she's not condescending. As mentioned earlier, one of this chapter’s first indications that Hiyoko was trying to shore up her bully persona (after the blow that was Mahiru's trial) was her bragging about manipulating Akane. There, she went out of her way to call Akane a useful idiot who's only good for dirty work. And yet, in this scene, not only does she ask with full candor if Akane understands the gravity of the situation, she’s disappointed when she doesn't. Disappointment implies there were expectations to begin with. I don't point this out to say this scene isn't a relapse on Hiyoko's part – it 100% is. If anything, I think it goes to show the extent of her breakdown: she's so distraught, she doesn't care anymore if she has to contradict her own malice to drive her point home.

Hiyoko’s relapse (and subsequent death) is why I assume her relationship with Mahiru is so often considered a waste. I may be something of an outlier in that I’ve never minded Hiyoko’s send-off from a writing standpoint and think only its incorporation into the case/deadly life is shoddy – but staying with the topic of this write-up, I’ll focus less on why I wouldn’t consider Hiyoko’s character as a whole wasted and more on why I wouldn’t consider her relationship with Mahiru wasted (even if the two go hand-in-hand to some degree).

The morning after Nekomaru's sacrifice, Hiyoko is seen mourning at Mahiru’s shrine. Choosing to talk to her triggers a rant about Nagito and how he pissed her off by lying about seeing Mahiru alive. She tearfully proclaims that she hates being lied to and won’t be satisfied until Nagito is brutalized as punishment, this clearly alluding to her heightened paranoia. It wouldn't even be the first time Nagito has lied to her, but comparing her reaction then vs. now, it becomes clear just how badly she's spiraling.

After this, the Despair Disease motive is officially introduced by Monokuma, and the afflicted students are brought to the hospital. Those remaining (minus Mikan, who’s tending to the patients) convene in the hospital lobby to discuss a plan of action, and that's when Hiyoko begins to insist on a quarantine.

I was honestly kind of surprised by how satisfied this scene's handling of Hiyoko left me feeling, and the more I analyze why, the more it all ties back to Mahiru.

Perhaps most obvious is her behavior. While she’s still not exactly a joy to be around, she's noticeably mellowed out. Upon review, I can count on one hand the number of times she says something rude:

When Gundham and Kazuichi debate the ethics of Mikan changing Nagito’s clothes (prompting this hilarious line), Hiyoko calls their conversation stupid and tells them to focus

When Hajime questions what she means by “isolate the patients,” she condescendingly asks him why he doesn’t get it

When explaining the purpose of the quarantine, she remarks (to no one in particular) that “even a preschooler knows” the only option when a disease is incurable is to stop it from spreading

When Gundham insists that everyone else station at the motel, she acquiesces with a, “Jeez, how annoying…”

Her nastiest remark by far is “I want them [the patients] to at least have the decency to consider committing suicide before they start bothering us.” Now, don’t get me wrong, this is a hideous thing to say under any circumstances, and there's no excuse for it. It puts a bad taste in my mouth. That said, with how unusually tame the rest of her dialogue is (hell, she refers to Mikan twice without so much as an insult to boot), I don’t think such an extreme comment is included arbitrarily. I think it's part of a deliberate pattern.

The bulk of Hiyoko’s arc this chapter – both positive and negative – has operated on the principle of “show, don’t tell.” This made sense before, but it makes extra sense now: because she’s too afraid to showcase vulnerability outright, the story has to find roundabout ways to convey that she isn’t as heartless as she would prefer to be seen.

Exhibit A: she claimed to believe that all killers deserve death, but when given the chance to coerce a killer into suicide, she faltered.

Exhibit B: she callously remarked that Fuyuhiko deserved his injuries, but when given the chance not to attend his recovery party, she did anyway. She tried to pass it off as an interest in the party itself, but never before had she established herself as a party-lover – quite the opposite; she called the Imposter’s party “lame” in 2-1 – making this an obvious bluff. So obvious, in fact, that Hajime “I know Nagito has the Liar Disease but I’ll take his words literally” Hinata immediately sees through it.

Exhibit C: at the party, she insisted that Fuyuhiko wasn’t forgiven yet and promised that, if push came to shove, he’d bear the brunt of any dangerous situation. But when given the chance to make good on this promise and force him to stay at the hospital, the idea didn’t even cross her mind. It was Fuyuhiko who rose to the occasion.

And finally, Exhibit D: she claims to wish the Despair Disease patients would kill themselves, but when given a chance to ditch – to give into her paranoia right away – she takes on a de-facto leader role in forming the plan to keep the patients safe. She doesn’t just come up with the idea, she spearheads the whole thing, from assigning her classmates roles to prompting Kazuichi to design a communication method between the hospital and motel. The player can’t progress to the next scene without speaking specifically to her.

So then… how does this all tie back to Mahiru? Well, I like to think of it in terms of before vs. after Nekomaru's sacrifice.

Before Nekomaru's sacrifice, it was Mahiru’s ideals of restoration that allowed Hiyoko to forgive Fuyuhiko, thereby doing away with some of her paranoia. After, it’s Mahiru’s ideals of teamwork that allow her to help combat the Despair Disease. Recall that, in the aftermath of the sacrifice, Hiyoko claimed there was no value in working together and that she didn’t want to be involved in any team efforts. Then why, pray tell, does she work together with her peers in this scene? Because it’s a last-ditch effort at honoring Mahiru – at doing what Mahiru would’ve done.

Of course, I say “last-ditch” because, no matter which way you slice it, the damage is already done. Hiyoko can work with her classmates to prevent another killing, but she can’t trust them – can’t get close to them. Mahiru’s ideals are strong, but in the face of overwhelming paranoia, they’re only enough to allow Hiyoko one final bow before she sequesters herself in her room.

We're given the impression that this withdrawal is just another act of selfishness – that Hiyoko is just trying to avoid the Despair Disease – but that turns out to be only part of the reason. Flash forward to the investigation, we learn that it was yet another last-ditch effort, this time to honor Mahiru by bathing and then tying her kimono the way she was taught. In her now empty motel room, Sonia expresses a regret: she didn’t understand what Hiyoko was going through – not really – and so she gave her some advice about a mirror then left her alone. It all comes together thematically from there.

Because of Hiyoko’s takeaway from Nekomaru’s sacrifice, she closed herself off from her peers (both literally and figuratively), and this furthered the divide between her and Fuyuhiko’s arcs. Nekomaru’s words caused Fuyuhiko to realize that this new life of his wasn’t a spare; it was precious. Nekomaru’s actions, on the other hand, caused Hiyoko to realize that her life was a fragile thing, and instead of becoming self-preserving like Fuyuhiko, she became self-isolating. She believed the only way to avoid a meaningless death was to go it alone, but going it alone – that is, isolating herself to the point where no one could understand her enough to help her – became her undoing.

But was that undoing meaningless? From an overarching narrative standpoint, maybe. Her death has no lasting impact on the rest of the story (she comes up again only when her grown-up picture is discovered in 2-6), and the way it’s incorporated into the trial is downright sloppy. But when it comes to her death by itself – to the individual story it tells – boy oh boy does it have meaning, and the character most to thank for that is undoubtedly Mahiru.

Mahiru is what allows Hiyoko’s death to feel like something built up to, like something character-driven, as opposed to a shoehorned-in, hollow chapter 3 death. She makes it so that Hiyoko’s “wrong place, wrong time” scenario – while unlucky – is anything but random. The reason Hiyoko finds herself in that wrong place at the wrong time isn't sporadic misfortune; it’s the result of her grief, paranoia, lack of self-sustainability – and even to some extent even DR2’s theme of the burden of talent. It’s the tragedy to Fuyuhiko’s triumph and a poignant subversion of the usual Danganronpa formula, with Mahiru at the heart of it.

Mikan being the one to kill Hiyoko only works as well as it does because of Mahiru, too. She didn't do it out of spite, didn't hunt Hiyoko down or kidnap her. Hiyoko just happened to walk in on her killing Ibuki. But again, while this may be unlucky, it’s not at all random – not from a storytelling angle. Hiyoko heads to the music venue in the first place in a bid to prove her independence, yes, but it’s only because Mahiru has become so enmeshed with her idea of independence that this is the case. If being independent were the only thing driving her, she wouldn’t have found herself struggling with her kimono to begin with. She would have weathered the storm and gone without bathing until the Despair Disease passed. She’d done it before, after all. But she was desperate to honor Mahiru, to prove that Mahiru’s death wasn’t in vain because – hey, look – she’s self-sustaining now. Honoring Mahiru became her way of regaining control over not just her hygiene, but her life as well.

Speaking of control, bullying Mikan was one of the few things – squishing ants included – that served to give Hiyoko the sense of control over things for which she longed. Even at Fuyuhiko's recovery party, she used Mikan as an emotional scapegoat to avoid coming across as vulnerable, insulting her to distract from the fact that she’d just forgiven Mahiru’s killer. And yet, here, in her last-ditch effort to prove her independence – to prove her control – Mikan becomes that final, uncontrollable variable. She uses Hiyoko to regain control over things, and Hiyoko is helpless to stop it. This subtle role reversal is a refreshing instance of nuance in an otherwise very heavy-handed case; I’d take it over a cliché revenge plotline anyday.

And as if the irony of the situation weren't already there in spades, consider this: Hiyoko believed that human connection was a death sentence, and while she was mistaken when it came to everyone else, she was right when it came to Mahiru. Her inability to let Mahiru go is what led her to her own demise. The story doesn't say one way or another if her outlook is right or wrong; it lays the facts out on the table and lets the player decide for themselves. Although I do think some interpretations of her character are more correct than others, Hiyoko is ultimately up in the air to discuss, and that’s something I can appreciate about any character.

All in all, if a death symbolic of Hiyoko's lifelong demons is what her journey in 2-3 was building to from the start (which I firmly believe it was), then in order for Mahiru's impact to not be wasted, she just had to remain instrumental to that journey until the very end. In that sense, I'd say she succeeded.

Conclusion:

Hear that? That's the sound of my fingers dying.

Well then, it seems we’ve reached the end. Yay. :)

This took me over a month to complete, and I’m honestly happy with how it came out. I wish I’d discovered how fun it is to write argumentative pieces like this sooner – though, then again, having posted this means I won’t be beating the “obsessed with Mahiru and Hiyoko” allegations anytime soon lol. Hopefully you found some of my points compelling, regardless of what you personally think of either of them.

Thanks for reading!

[roulilia]

i’m back!! i’ll try to be more active in the future but today i’m gonna talk about ways to manifest!

personally i find the dear diary method so helpful and easy to use, i use it when making subs and just manifesting in general and it works wonders, but the most important thing is to make sure it sounds like you like don’t be writing things exactly like someone else is like if your used to using abbreviations then do that! remember it’s YOUR journey, no one else’s do things how ever you want.

i absolutely adore the void state it’s so easy to enter and i know you might be sat there like “alora if it’s so easy then how come i haven’t entered it yet?” ..i haven’t entered it either BUT i’m quite optimistic that i will and there’s no rush to enter it. you’ve probably seen like thousands of posts on here about methods you can use to enter it but honestly you don’t need methods, it’s like shifting realities you don’t need a method but they can help, the void state is just a state of pure consciousness and you can find guided meditations on yt if you like those or relax yourself through breathing techniques or just set the intention to idk wake up there or something. i personally don’t like it when people talk about methods to enter the void or shift and they’re like “oh there’s a 100% success rate with this method” cause not everything is going to work for everyone, everyone’s different and you can’t guarantee that every single person that uses the method will shift/enter the void cause like i always say we’re all completely different from each other alike i personally hate like i despise guided meditations cause i can’t focus at all during them but someone else might love them and they could be the only way they can relax and stuff. please let me know if you have any questions!!

thank you for reading, happy shifting/manifesting🫶🏼

also please follow my new acc @prettierou !!

[thisismarisaaa]

*I have put a pause on this for awhile. Will reach out to others at a later date.*

We’re dipping into winter soon and I think I would like to dip my toes back into indie rping over discord only. I’m over 25 so I ask that any partners be over 22, though older ones are even more preferred.

Some things about me and what I’m looking for:

I consider myself a literate writer but I do prefer quality over quantity, meaning if we start out with long replies and over time they dwindle down a bit, that’s okay by me. I’m also very into texting threads for some quick fire. I just ask that your replies contain at least a paragraph or two, I want to know your characters thoughts, desires, all of that.

I am looking to double, and generally only write m x f for now. Please see further down for my Pinterest board of wanted fcs, I would love to see yours as well.

All of my rps will contain ns.fw content of all kinds, please let me know your triggers. 

I enjoy angst, toxic dynamics, hurt/comfort, all sorts of tropes. Fluff is good and well but I’m probably going to pull on your heartstrings more often than not.

I am a friendly person ooc and want someone who is friendly, social, and looking to connect outside our writing. I like to share aesthetics, inspiration, and music! I want to write with people who are just as into the plot as I am.

I try to be as active as I can but this can vary due to work/life. I will let you know when I’m gone for an extended time. Please do not rush my replies, I will not rush yours! 

I’m looking for the following plots (Some I have specific ideas for, others we would need to collaborate a bit):

Crime/Mafia 

Royal arranged marriage

Toxic exes/toxic ships

Sugar daddy/Sugar baby tropes

Please click here for my Wanted FCs pinboard → Wanted Opposites 

As you can see I like real face claims as well as animated and I’m fine with you having the same!

If you’re interested in chatting please like this post. Because I’m getting pinged as spamming for sending links, I can’t guarantee I’ll send you a link to this post, so please check your likes if I reach out to you to refer back here. Thanks for your understanding!! Also please have your DMs open or like...I can't message you lmao

[melodygatesauthor]

Weekly Update

09/17/2023 (Yeah I'm a day late, so what, wanna fight about it?)

Announcements/Reminders

Just a little reminder that I've slowed down production as far as writing goes. I'm still writing daily. Sometimes it's a sentence, sometimes it's 3k words, but I'm trying to be kinder to myself and remember that it's a hobby, not a job. I also really want to start my novel and stop pressuring myself to finish fics FIRST so I'm doing that.

Updates will still be happening for all my WIPS - see a comprehensive list of my current WIPs here - but I'm just not pressuring myself by setting deadlines. Thank you for still being supportive <3

ART ANNOUNCEMENTS

I'm taking art commissions! - Pricing - Follow my art blog: @melodymakesart

I did my first full color NSFW drawing! It can be seen HERE. It's a series, so there will be two more drawings coming out over the next couple weeks!

Fic Updates

So after taking last week off from working on my WIPs all together - (Note: I spent the week working on a Basil fic and also working on my Duke Leto fic) - I'm feeling a bit more refreshed and ready to get back into working on them again.

Fic Updates

Disclaimer - I never know which way the winds of inspiration will blow. Timeframes aren’t a promise/guarantee, they’re a goal.

Fic Updates Legend:

Blue - Update this week

Pink - Update in progress

Red - Backburner Fic (not currently working on. See WIP list for status)

You can find my current WIP list here

Chaptered Fic Updates

Always Yours, Never Mine - Chapter 4 is in progress, hoping to have the next update out either next week or the week after!

The Fractured Moon - Chapter 4 is in progress for this one as well. I'm not going to promise an update for next week but I'm actively working on it.

Mini-series Updates

Feeling You Can’t Fight - Okay, I've been putting off editing this one for so long and idk why but I'm going to get it done and posted on Wednesday 09/20/2023 this week!

Worth the Risk - That's right, babygirl is making her way back into my scope. You guys voted on this poll to give me an idea of what you wanted me to work on (not including TFM and AYNM) so I put this back in my field of view since you all seemed to want it so bad!

Remember to look at my WIP list for other backburner fics - There are many not included above lol).

AI Character Bot Updates

I currently have the following bots on my list that I’m working on. If you have any suggestions or additions you’d like, please feel free to ask! I won’t make every single one I get asked for but I’ll make some of them as I get time!

DBF Jake and Steven (I already did Marc...did I ever post him? I thought I did but maybe not)

Patient Steven and Marc

Moon Knight Rescue scenario

Am I missing any? Don't see one on the list that you want to add? Send me an inbox or private message! No promises, but if I like the idea I'll make an AI bot.

Note: Yes it's taking me forever to make them SHUT UP

I think that's all for now! Much love!

Don't forget to follow my other blogs:

@melodymakesart - My art blog

@lockandkeynovel - The blog for my original fiction novel, Lock & Key

@melodyreadsfanfiction - The blog where I reblog works I intend to read, a good place for fanfic readers to follow!

@melodygatesupdates - This is where I'll reblog any chapter updates for my fics and whatnot. This is what I use instead of a tag list!

[halofcrged]

RULES.

            going to try and keep this pretty simple & straightforward.

I.  You must be 18+ to interact with me. I am 42 years old.

            There will be not safe for work content on this blog of the sexual and potentially of the graphic violence nature.  I do tag everything that might be triggering and am happy to tag whatever you ask me to so long as I remember!

                            I ask that you tag any visuals containing spiders with spider tw* spiders tw* arachnophobia tw* etc etc and yes, I know it’s a weird one but anything about the taste of soap or eating soap is a trigger so just tag it with soap tw* or penny don’t look* as I have that blacklisted too.  I don’t have any triggering fcs or what not.

II. This blog is multi-ship, multi-verse, crossover & au friendly.  

          Every ship is in its’ own verse unless previously discussed with all parties.  Every thread or set of threads takes place in its own universe unless previously discussed with all parties.

III.  I write anything from one-liners to novellas, it really just depends on life, my headspace, how much sleep I’ve been getting, how much else I have going on in real life, etc.

IV. My activity is NOT consistent.  I am infamous for blog hopping.  I have literally replied to some starters / replies two years+ after they were originally written.  I am not fast.  If I am fast, it’s by some small miracle and perfect storm of brain, muse and free time.  It will not last.

V.  I have kids, cats and dogs; I am in college, I have a household to take care of and I have many physical and mental handicaps that can affect my ability to function and write, including but not limited to rheumatoid arthritis, osteoarthritis, spinal stenosis, ganglion cysts, torn meniscus, migraines, hypothyroidism, PMDD, nerve damage, herniated disc, ADHD, depression, anxiety, C-PTSD and severe insomnia.  

                          Roleplay is something I do for fun.  

                                  If it isn’t fun, I don’t do it.  

                                         If it’s stressing me out, I’ll avoid it.  

VI. I do graphic commissions.  

          I run @tuppencetrinkets where I post the millions of screencaps and 200x100 icons that I make.  The resources are free but donations are always appreciated as I pay about $40 in hosting / program fees a month.   My commissions are always pay what you can.  I hate setting prices because I want everyone to have pretties if they want them and I don’t know what anyone can afford at any given time.  I do everything from base icons to edited icons, backgrounds, headers, dividers, promos, videos, you name it.  I try to be quick with turnaround but again – sometimes I just can’t be.

VII.  I am fine with plotting things out in advance or winging it.  I really don’t care, whatever you are more comfortable with is fine with me.

               I like all kinds of plots.  I like fluffy things, slice of life, broships, frenemies, enemies, familial, found family, long arcing, one shot throwaway, dark and twisted, you name it plots.  I will not write n*ncon or anything nsfw themed /even hinted at with minor characters and I won’t write any explicit child death etc. but most everything else is fair game.

VIII.  You can throw a million memes at me any time you want to.

IX.  You can throw any and all starters at me any time you want to.

                I’m not necessarily mutual exclusive but I don’t guarantee I’ll respond to memes or starters from non-mutual blogs.

X. I use icons, headers, promos etc. that I make myself 99% of the time.  Please do not use any of my edited graphics.  All base icons I use are free and available on my resource blog.  

XI. I use small text and my icons are 200x100 with empty space to make them 540x130 so that they don’t stretch out on mobile.  I prefer not heavily edited replies in terms of font variance and colors but really don’t care that much.

XII.  I’ve probably forgotten relevant things but, who knows.

XIII.  No drama.  Period.  I’m not interested.  

XIV.  I’m here for fun.  I’m really pretty easy going.  If you have any questions feel free to toss them into my inbox!

[forgedivinity]

HELLO!I’m Sara (25+) and have been roleplaying for 10+ years.This is a selective, private, and 18+ only multimuse. Rebooted August 2024

A study in: wrath. all consuming grief. the corruption of a pure soul. unbridled curiosity. grey morality. unconditional love. the test of time. duty. justice.

Inbox: open

Status: indefinite semi-hiatus due to real life stress. ooc communication will be super slow/maybe nonexistent idk. ic interactions will likely be queued when i feel up to doing them. might be online every once in a while, but the majority of my time and energy will be focused elsewhere until my shit gets together. Update: Along with the what was mentioned before, I'm getting married next year (December 2024) and a lot of my time free time will be spent wedding planning since we finally have a date.

Active starter call: none

Most muse for: n/a

Updated: 08/14/2024

Note: Since tumblr keeps getting rid of the mutuals checker, please hardblock me if you wish to unfollow . I won't be offended, I just don't want to have to manually check my followers list every time I want to interact on the dash.

Affiliates: @never-surrender | @witchered / @viscountbard

damaris | mixcoatl | ishtar | ninshubur | artio

Rules under cut | INTEREST TRACKER

the mun

My name is Sara

I’m 27

Apparently I can’t escape lol If you recognize me or my muses I’d love to reconnect! It’s been a while, but if there is an old plot or thread you’d like to continue I’m so down– if not I’m comfortable with starting over! Or if I’m not your vibe anymore, there’s no pressure to even follow back

Feel free to ask for my new discord!

Just about everything graphics wise has been commissioned for me, DO NOT STEAL.

CREDITS: icons for Dama ( godresembled ) | icons psd ( stephysource ) |

general about

MULTI-VERSED.

I’LL RP WITH JUST ABOUT ALL FANDOMS, even ones I don’t have verses for!

I USE A REAL-LIFE FC AS WELL AS AN ANIMATED ONE depending on the muse.

THIS IS A MUTUALS ONLY BLOG. If I’m not following you, please don’t message me. If you’re not following me, I won’t bother you. I take follows as signs of interest and I do unfollow after a time of not being mutuals automatically.

NO GODMODDING/METAGAMING/HATE

SELECTIVE. But I have a tendency to follow back pretty easily and like to give others a fair chance.

Since English isn’t everyone’s first language, and I tend to make mistakes as well, I’m not very strict on grammar. IF I CAN READ IT AND UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU’VE WRITTEN, WE’RE GOOD.

I do Icon, One Liners, Paragraph, Multi-Paragraph, and Novella(I have to really love the plot, you, and your muse to do this shit.)

I’M ALL FOR AU’S. We could have a million threads of absolute nonsense and I’d love it.

Do I accept those with the same face claims I use? FUCK YEAH I DO.

DEFINITELY OC AND SELF-INSERT FRIENDLY

asks/inbox

You’re more than welcome to spam my inbox, I think they’re awesome icebreakers; I can’t guarantee I’ll answer all of them, but I sure do love variety and options

I never expect it you to reply to every answer, but you can definitely treat answers/asks as starters!

I answer all ic things in a new post that you can reblog!

I lovelovelove unprompted/non-meme related asks and I’m always (as long as my inbox is open) accepting them!

reply time

Listen… I have a full time job, a long ass commute, and a fiance. Because of this, I will very rarely be online/writing during weekdays (however I do lurk often)

I will operate on a queue most of the time or at least I try to

Just to let everyone know, I have adhd and my motivation wildly fluctuates/I get distracted incredibly easily. I promise that I’m interested in the IM/ask/thread and I apologize if it can take me a while to get to something, it’s just that the stars have to be aligned just right for me to do literally anything.

So if you require interaction/replies within a certain time span, I’m probably not the mun for you. If I follow you, I WANT to write together, but I just simply don’t have the time/energy to do it as often as I would like.

Also, just to throw out there, because I am pretty slow to get to asks/IMs/replies, PLEASE TAKE AS MUCH TIME AS YOU NEED. I will never, EVER be upset with how long something takes, as long as I still get the vibes that you’re still interested in interacting with me in some way.

YOU CAN ASK ME IF I FORGOT SOMETHING/GIVE ME LITTLE NUDGE. I truly don’t mind for the most part, but don’t hound me because it honestly won’t be uncommon for you to potentially wait a few weeks for a reply, depending on how busy I am.

mains & exclusives

So I do practice mains/affiliates if you’ve seen my pinned post lmao. These blogs do take priority when it comes to threads/ships/plot ideas. I love new partners/interactions and I’m always open to them, but these are muns I consider friends so I usually have the most muse for their stuff and am very unlikely to queue their replies.

As for the canon characters of my mains, I’m okay with interacting with duplicates, but like I said, their interpretations will take priority.

If you’re ever interested in being a main, just let me know! We just have to vibe really well together and have a good dynamic going.

I am extremely picky about exclusives though, as I don’t like limiting myself. The exclusive muses I have now are with a mun I’ve been friends/writing with for years, so that’s pretty much the bar I’m looking for.

shipping

MULTISHIP

I absolutely love this shit, and if we do have a ship there’s a good chance you’ll get random starters/memes/and love.

As much as I love romance, other relationships are VERY important to me and my muses. Give me brotps, hateships, mentors, family, all of it.

Sometimes first meetings are awkward/slow going so I’m always happy to talk about pre-exsiting relationships as long as both muns agree on chemistry.

If I suggest a ship or relationship that you’re not feeling, feel free to shoot me down. I have a tendency to jump the gun sometimes lol

following back/unfollowing:

I AM AN 18+ ONLY BLOG. If your age range isn’t clearly visible, even on mobile, I will not follow and/or soft block you. Even the possibility of interacting with minors makes me uncomfy.

YOU NEED TO HAVE AN ACCESSIBLE RULES AND ABOUT PAGE.

I’m going to be honest, I very rarely break being mutuals; I thoroughly look through blogs/rules/about pages when I follow someone, so I know what I signed up for. I generally don’t care about what you post or how you handle your business, you do you boo. THAT BEING SAID, I will likely break mutuals for these reasons:

GUILT-TRIPPING/VAGUE BLOGGING. Either directed at myself or the dash as a whole. I understand that we’re just people and we get low/insecure and that’s fine! I’m not the type to lose my mind over a one time/rare thing. But if I’m constantly seeing ooc posts like “no one wants to interact with me” “i guess people just don’t like talking” or anything of that nature just turns me off. It’s so negative and I don’t need that energy in my life… and this will sound harsh, but I don’t really care if me blocking you for these reasons feeds this mindset.

“LIKE THIS TO REMAIN MUTUALS” POSTS. This just… rubs me the wrong way. I have never once interacted with these posts and have never been unfollowed as a result, which is very telling to me.

GENERAL PASSIVE-AGGRESSION. It’s not something I put up with in my personal life, there’s no reason I should tolerate it here.

IF I EVEN GET A SNIFF OF INTOLERANCE FOR ANY RACE/SEX/GENDER/SEXUALITY/ETC. Reported on sight.

ACTIVELY WRITING OUT/IMAGES OF CHILD ABUSE/PEDOPHILIA. I work with children and have a lot of love for them, explicit content of this DEVASTATES ME. If your muse was abused as a child and its mentioned in their backstory or comes up in threads that’s fine. There’s no fucking excuse for your muse being a pedo though, I will report your ass.

WRITING RAPE/SEXUAL ASSAULT. Same rules of child abuse applies.

TREATING ME AS YOUR THERAPIST. This is kinda niche, but I’ve had problems in the past of being used for this purpose. I’m not a professional and I’m not equipped to deal with mental health/extreme personal crises of others, and it’s not fair to expect me to do so. In some cases, depending on the topic, this can be extremely triggering for me. If I notice my personal boundaries are being encroached on I’ll communicate it with you and there’s no harm done, but if it continues/the line is crossed entirely I will remove you from my space without warning/explanations.

I DO HARDBLOCK WHEN BREAKING MUTUALS, so if I simply unfollowed IT WAS VERY MUCH AN ACCIDENT/GLITCH AND PLEASE TELL ME.

nsfw/triggers

THERE WILL BE NSFW CONTENT

I LOVE DARKER PLOTS BRING ON THE HORROR

Aside from gore, blood, and the like, cannibalism will be a frequent topic on this blog. Damaris practices a blood magic that requires her to consume the blood or flesh of another. In some of her verses she a creature who just straight up eats people. If this is something that makes you uncomfortable don’t follow me.

Triggering content will be tagged under ____ cw

I’m not interested in writing out smut, so if the plot is headed that way it’s going to fade to black.

other important roleplay stuff

DO NOT HOLD YOUR MUSE BACK. I won’t do it, so you shouldn’t have to. I’m cool with just about anything your muse does! Your muse wants to hit mine? DO IT! They want to kiss them? DO IT! Do whatever your muse wants!

Just let me know if your muse attempts to kill mine.

MUN ISN’T MUSE.

I format my replies a little bit, but it makes no difference to me if you do or don’t.

If you see something in the wishlist tag that you’d be interested in doing, just copy and paste the prompt into an ask and I’ll write the starter!

PLEASE DON’T GET UPSET IF I SUDDENLY STOP TALKING TO YOU. I’m not ignoring you I swear, I’m just forgetful and sometimes get distracted and the next thing I know an ask has been sitting in my inbox for way longer than it should have.

[thegentlefem]

hi everyone! I recently got an influx of followers and I just want to say that I appreciate everyone and your compliments about the account. you all are great.

as a present to you guys, I made a little about me post. please don’t reblog it, but do feel free to copy these prompts to make your own bio.

Hobbies: photography, exercising, travel, reading, anything outdoors

Things I like: chai lattes, dogs, Marvel movies before phase 3 (generally), cars (racing), sci-fi, the beach, sports. I like the summertime and you can usually find me at the lake/pool/wherever water is when the weather gets hot. I’m a bit of a science and history nerd so there’s that.

Turn-ons: I have a list of these in my main bio already so I’ll write some non-kinky things here. It may sound weird but good hair, like a nice hairstyle, is really attractive to me. It’s like the first thing I notice visually about a guy. Also his pretty eyes. Other random turn-ons I can think of are accents, intelligence!!, men who think before speaking, and, you guessed it, a **good personality**.

Turn-offs: the word “daddy”. in any context. I’m sorry but I just...can’t. Hm what else... Smoking is also a turn off. Sorry to all the smokers out there. Also, intense age play is a no. I do love humiliation/degradation if my partner enjoys it (obviously), although any real shaming or toxic masculinity/femininity are big turn offs.

What kinks are you exploring atm?

Intoxication kink. I haven’t experimented with this in real life because it pushes the consent barrier for me, but in theory, intox kink is so hot. Something about having a tipsy sub stumbling around and begging for more...hm yeah. Also have been obsessed with shaving kink content (source material: that Skyfall scene).

Favorite cheesy romance tropes: enemies to lovers, only one bed, hurt/comfort, fake dating to developing feelings.

Random fact(s): I am absolutely terrible at cooking and baking. There’s a reason why my friends usually are the ones to make dinner and not me. I guess I should put an ad out there for a malewife who is good in the kitchen. Either that or we’ll just be struggling together to make bad food. I’m sure we’ll bond in the process but I can’t guarantee that we’ll produce anything edible.

---

anyways I hope you all enjoyed this! if you message me or send an ask related to these topics, I will probably be happy to chat. I’m not active daily on this account but I try to keep my queue running, so if you message me and I don’t respond, I promise I’m not ignoring, I am just actually busy lol. (make sure to have your age in your bio or you will be blocked)

I will also just reiterate that other than what is already posted in my bio, I will never share my name, location, photos, etc. so don’t mistake my kindness for naivety and ask me for any of these.

[chris-the-dragonslayer]

Where I’ve been and why I didn’t post any new OC of my WIP: Book II in the last 10 months

Oh boy. Where do I even start with this. I stopped active writing / editing my book in late August of 2021. My last „real OC entry on here“ was around April of 2022. But why you might ask?

In April of 2019 Google+ got shut down. (Please bear with me this is relevant). Because of that I had a mad scramble to get all my posts saved on there. (Didn’t work out how I intended it to - but that’s life). I posted a lot of plants and flowers with short descriptions as a passion project. After that got shut down I had to move to a new place. So I opened a Google Sites website. (Only took me 4 months until that was finished). Because of that less and less of my free time I had to work on the WIP.

In October of 2019 I had the brilliant idea: I could make my own website. So I copied all my work from my Google Sites page to my website and worked on that. My own website launched on the 01.01.2020 at midnight.

During that time it grew a bit in popularity because of my account on the platform with the blue bird in the logo. So I spent most of my time working full time and building up my website.

My WIP 🚧 got kinda abandoned for a few months. Up until mid 2020. I started working on and off on it again until the end of 2021. The notes I got on my posts on here dwindled down tho, because i didn’t post as many snippets and pieces of OC on here anymore. I really wanted to turn my vision into a real book. I had searched for publishers and all.

So i thought, the less I share the less can be stolen from my idea. (Resulting in less interactions on my posts).

Around April 2022 I kind of lost interest in publishing my work again because I saw how „bad“ it all was. It’s no coherent idea/ story. A bit of a mashup between many genres at best.

I shifted my focus on my website again. Letting that take up my free time again. (Currently it has about 300 posts about plants on it - all in German tho).

I went on a silent hiatus on here. Not wanting to disappoint anyone. I thought no one would notice if I vanished.

That brings us to today. I picked up my WIP again. After so long. I want to work on it again. And somehow cut everything that I don’t need in it. I’ll keep a kind of „directors cut of everything“ but I’ll try and edit it so it makes more sense and puts all storylines in a coherent story.

I hope that some of my followers are still interested in progress updates and short snippets.

I can’t guarantee for anything. But I sure as heck will try my best.

- Mike aka Chris-the-dragonslayer / the one who doesn’t know when to stop with subplots

[arkyn-iceborn-vindication]

SHIPPING INFO //ANSWER THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR MUSES SO PEOPLE KNOW HOW SHIPPING WORKS ON YOUR BLOG.

WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER(S)?

My OTP with Arkyn is definitely Ahri. More specifically, Arkyn with @ahrichus--archived-blog‘s Ahri. Mo is one of my best friends and one of the main reasons I got so involved in the LoL RPC back in the day. The mixture of fluff and angst between these two immortal goofballs was such a pleasure to write. Mo’s retired from the RP scene, but I still often send them HCs and such about the two characters.

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?

Great question, especially since Arkyn is at least 9,000 years old (though depending on verse, most of that was in stasis). I’d say that any character around 25-ish can reasonably date any older character without me feeling very weirded out by it. There’s exceptions to every rule, obviously, but that’s the first thing that comes to mind. If the hypothetical 25-year-old has known, say, this 60 year old since they were much younger, that can definitely feel weird to me. Otherwise, I feel like the half-the-oldest-character’s-age-plus-seven rule makes decent sense for me.

HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NSFW?

I’m more than happy to write violence n gore, but smut is something I’m rather averse to writing. The moment the clothes come off or when hands begin to wander, I’m fading to black.

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?

I feel like I’m just as selective as most people would be. I like seeing Arkyn’s character develop by meeting someone and entering into a romance, but I’m not gonna smack characters together and expect things to work out. I prefer the characters having known each other for quite some time before they “fall.” Slow burn / mutual pining is the best. If I don’t feel like there’s good chemistry between our muses after a few interctions, it’s unlikely a ship will come to fruition.

WHO ARE OTHER CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?

Arkyn’s had lots of relationships here on tumblr throughout the years. Most of them were with other peoples’ OCs, but there were a few League characters mixed in. Ahri, Ashe, canon-divergent Katarina, very canon-divergent Lissandra, and I’ve always been curious about trying a ship with a Sejuani. I like the idea of a Sejuani ship being a slow burn or a forced proximity since Arkyn’s first impression of Sejuani was poor, and both are proud and competent warriors with differing world views. It could even be a relationship that fails and they’re bitter exes. Really, I just want to interact with a Sejuani more because I rarely got the chance to write with any back in the day. If I were to pick any other champs, I would be curious to have Kai’sa interact with Arkyn if only for them to have shared void trauma to bond over.

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?

I would like to discuss ships before we just jump into one, and, as stated before, I can be selective about who Arkyn would reciprocate feelings for. However, that doesn’t mean characters without many Arkyn interactions can’t send in ship-related asks or starters. In fact, unrequited love is a side of writing I haven’t often explored. I’ll probably DM you if we haven’t discussed it yet to hash out ideas, but if your character wants to put some moves on the ice boy, feel free! I can’t guarantee he’ll immediately be into it, but we can always wing it and see where it goes.

ARE YOU SHIP-OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?

My desire to write romance comes and goes, but judging from past experience in the RPC, if I’ve got an active ship I’m likely to err more on the side of obsessed rather than not. I don’t think I’m one to go out of my way to find new ships for Arkyn, but I do love to write him dealing with his own feelings should I have an active shipping partner.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?

That’s a tough question, honestly. I’ve been only tangentally involved in League for a long time, and I’m not sure if there’s a ship I particularly prefer to others. Ekko/Jinx is interesting from a tragic perspective, but I wouldn’t call it my favorite by any means. Once upon a time I shipped Shen and Irelia, but current lore makes me feel like Shen would have too many problems with Irelia’s philosophy for them to mesh.It’s been a while since I had any sort of CanonxCanon OTP.

If I were to step oustide of the LoL fandom though, I’ve been playing a lot of Octopath Journey 2 recently and I’m seeing some chemistry between Agnea and Hikari 👀 Also seems like Hikari and Throné have a lot in common but I’m not sure if I’d necessarily ship the two together.

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?

Message me! I’m always down to discuss ships, especially if there’s a certain dynamic or trope we want to achieve with the relationship. I haven’t really done any pre-established relationships before as far as romance goes, but I’d be willing to give it a go if I felt it was justifiable between each muse. Honestly, even a one-off comment in a tag or some inner monologue in a thread that implies a muse might be catching feelings could be enough if I feel the two could be a good pair. But yes, the most reliable way is to message me privately, and I would be more than glad to figure out any sort of shipping.

Tagged by: @misstantabismuses and @witchcraftandburialdirt Tagging: @cherrychitters @the-expatriate @chronicparagon @korvyna @eightfoldjourney and YOU

[bobacheol]

request faq

open - everything you need to know before you request

who do i write for?

seventeen - any member or pairing, preferably one of my biases or otps (check my about me for more) 

hogwarts mystery - almost anyone in the circle of khanna or in quidditch

fantastic beasts - i mainly focus on the scamander bond or theseus + leta; i might accept others but it’s not guaranteed

what won’t i write?

male!reader - i always try and write gender neutral y/n though!

romance with merula - i’m sorry, but i genuinely can’t see a healthy relationship between her and mc

anything overly explicit - i’m more than okay to discuss or imply it in any story

character in canon relationship with someone else - i love canon couples so... (e.g., i’m not going to write jacob x newt)

illegal romances - no p*dophelia or anything like it

incest - i love the scamander brothers, but not as lovers

anything else to consider?

i’m not active 24/7 as a student, but i’ll try to be around!

this is my 2nd blog account, so i can’t be the first person to discuss anything

i’ll likely just end up writing short drabbles with any request

─ 

feel free to request as long as it fits within these requirements!

[pawkkun]

01. | general info

this is a mutuals-only, highly selective, multimuse run by darcy (27, they/them, EST). ‣ i am entirely mobile-bound. i don’t have access to x-kit, so all threads will be continued in a new post to avoid prohibitively long posts clogging my followers’ dashes. please reach out if you’re worried about this affecting your thread tracker. ‣ this blog has a very slow turnaround rate. i don’t post ic content daily, nor do i run off a queue. i write when i have the muse and try not to force myself when i don’t, so please be patient with me. ‣ all portrayals are informed by my own headcanons.

02. | following

if we’re mutuals, i’m open to interacting, so please feel free to send asks (prompts never expire), interact with my ooc and headcanon posts, or reach out via dms to plot or just chat. i appreciate this sort of interaction because i’m shy and find it difficult to initiate conversations with new followers without “permission.” ‣ i am duplicate, oc, au, and crossover friendly! non-rp blogs dni (unless that’s how you follow/follow back, in which case, please let me know!) ‣ i’m not comfortable following anyone who is under the age of 21. if you don’t have an age or age range listed somewhere visible on your blog, i won’t follow/follow back. ‣ if after a few months of following, you show no interest in writing with me or at least interacting ooc to some degree, i may unfollow/softblock you just to keep my dash focused on people i’m actively communicating with. you’re welcome to reach out/refollow if you’d like to try again! ‣ if for any reason, you decide you no longer want to be mutuals, feel free to soft block me. there won’t be any hard feelings.

03. | writing

‣ i am a novella writer. on average, my replies range from 3 to 5 paragraphs (200-600 words), but i don’t expect anyone to match. write what feels right for the scene. quality is always more important than quantity. ‣ my formatting is limited to small text, bolded dialogue, and stylistic italics. i don’t use icons. if you need me to use regular sized text for our threads, i’m happy to do so! ‣ i don’t ever rush my own writing, nor will i rush you to get replies to me. writing is a hobby, and i don’t like adding anxiety into the mix. thread replies, asks, and any other things of this nature have no experiation dates. if you’re struck with inspiration to respond to something six months after i wrote it, please feel free to do so. i guarantee i’ll be thrilled to receive an unexpected reply. ‣ that said, i have a tendency to respond much faster to threads/asks from people who communicate with me ooc. i don’t need to plot out entire threads or anything, but i value ooc communication with my rp partners and find a lot of joy in discussing characters/ideas.

04. | shipping/dynamics

i’m happy to explore all kinds of dynamics from romantic to platonic to familial to antagonistic! as of now, i’m multiship and don’t currently practice ship exclusivity. ‣ for romantic dynamics, i require a decent amount of ooc communication, especially since some of my muses can be difficult to ship with for various reasons. ‣ it’s very rare that i will do pre-established relationships with ocs. because i can’t get to know them via canon, i want to get to know them through rp, so exploring the development of the relationship through threads is really important. ‣ kiss ask prompts and the like are a good “what if” scenario that i’m willing to write even if we haven’t established/discussed a ship, but i may not want to expand it into a thread without discussing ooc. ‣ i am also willing to explore one-sided crushes, unrequited love, or relationships that don’t work out if that’s something you’re interested in. ‣ any nsfw content (ic or headcanons) will be tagged ‘tw suggestive’ and will be under the cut.

05. | etiquette

‣ any transphobia, homophobia, racism, zionism, antisemitism, or other bigotry will lead to an immediate hard block. ‣ i don’t engage in mun drama or callouts, and frequent passive aggressive or vague posting about other blogs might lead to a soft block. if you have a serious concern about someone i follow (ie they’re a real threat offline), please reach out privately so you and i can discuss things like adults.

[celestialmaison]

Ditto, likewise, and every other sentiment that means “I agree” and “me too” and “yes.” Yes.

And the one thing I’ll argue against is complicated, but I’m going to do it anyway. There’s a light that lately more than ever I find myself sinking my nails into because I’m grasping onto it with everything I’ve got while nameless and faceless shadows attempt to tear it away from me: writing is more than a minimal engagement side job.

Writing…writing is truly what you make it. Being an artist in a world that refuses to respect or look out for all artists is going to be what we make it for the rest of our lives, and possibly the remainder of human existence. Artists practice insanely complex work with whatever tools we can get our sticky fingers on and leave nuanced pieces of ourselves in everything even when we aren’t being paid what we deserve, getting the recognition we deserve, or being treated the way we deserve for opening our hearts, for spending that time, for letting our insecurities eat us alive while doing the thing anyway, for trying again and again and again often while never getting the confirmation that one day things will be alright and stay that way, for having the fucking audacity to have an imagination or a vision or a dream or a premonition and the shamelessness to create whether we have permission or not and the hope to say “This is my world” and believe someone will receive your message in a bottle that’s traveled time and space to get from your mind to another even though there’s. no. guarantee.

The work artists do goes unrecognized everywhere. I’m about to graduate from college with an English degree from a school that’s actively phasing out every humanities program at my university, making it harder for humanities students to graduate, get faculty support, and find job opportunities. Last month I left my management+writing job at the publication I was with because my staff was racist, refused to acknowledge it, and we were barely getting paid (and this is after I interned with them for a year for free.) (Some) writers and actors are on strike for nuanced reasons, one of which is they are willing to endure more suffering, more uncertainty, and more disruption to fight for the possibility that things will get better for everyone.

Art is the choices we make. Writing is the choices we make. With the ongoing rise of prejudiced books bans in the U.S. (an issue i’m sure has plagued other countries for significantly longer) and restrictions on k-12 education (again: other countries have probably endured this for longer) and this year’s writer’s strike and the actor’s strike and the AI revolution that is not going to end well but not before all of our stupid societies get so tangled in it they nearly suffocate us all, the majority of us are being reminded the hard way (as always) that being an artist is not easy. The choices we have to make are not easy. Our crafts are not easy. This world is heavy and our histories are crushing and every day it seems like life is getting more and more difficult to handle. There’s no time to make art, and if there is, we can’t focus, or we’re not inspired, or we’re so exhausted from our “day jobs” or our disabilities or so much more that all we can do is sleep. And it’s so easy for us to forget why we even do what we do when everything is urgent.

I don’t know what’s next for the artists of our world, where we’ll wander from here, how much longer we have to shout about how art is a real occupation worthy of love or if we’ll ever be recognized the way we deserve while our species is still alive. The only thing I know for sure is this: someone cares about the things you want to create and the stories you want to tell, and that is reason enough to hold onto your light.

there's something deeply gutting about being a writer right now. watching studio execs brag about starving people like you out of your very house just to not pay you anything above the pennies you currently make. watching some people cheer over AO3 being targeted for a DDOS attack. the complete lack of profitability of writing commissions or writing in general in transformative spaces, especially in contrast to fanart. the pivot of so many social media platforms to be video and image based near-exclusively.

I don't know. it just makes me sad to know that the hobby that kept me alive while growing up homeschooled with dial-up internet and local antenna TV... is only ever gonna be a side job with minimal engagement. I know this site is good about supporting libraries and the concept of books but, do me a favor? Reach out to a writer friend you know. Leave a comment on your last five read stories on your favorite website.

Tell us you care.

[fallsfcrged]

            going to try and keep this pretty simple & straightforward.

I.  You must be 18+ to interact with me. 21+ is preferred.

            There will be not safe for work content on this blog of the sexual and potentially of the graphic violence nature.  I do tag everything that might be triggering and am happy to tag whatever you ask me to so long as I remember!

                            I ask that you tag any visuals containing spiders with spider tw* spiders tw* arachnophobia tw* etc etc and yes, I know it’s a weird one but anything about the taste of soap or eating soap is a trigger so just tag it with soap tw* or penny don’t look* as I have that blacklisted too.  I don’t have any triggering fcs or what not.

II. This blog is multi-ship, multi-verse, crossover & au friendly.  

          Every ship is in its’ own verse unless previously discussed with all parties.  Every thread or set of threads takes place in its own universe unless previously discussed with all parties.

III.  I write anything from one-liners to novellas, it really just depends on life, my headspace, how much sleep I’ve been getting, how much else I have going on in real life, etc.

IV. My activity is NOT consistent.  I am infamous for blog hopping.  I have literally replied to some starters / replies years+ after they were originally written.  I am not fast.  If I am fast, it’s by some small miracle and perfect storm of brain, muse and free time.  It will not last.

V. I’m 42.  I have kids, cats, & dogs; I am in college, I have a household to take care of and I have many physical and mental handicaps that can affect my ability to function and write, including but not limited to rheumatoid arthritis, osteoarthritis, spinal stenosis, ganglion cysts, torn meniscus, migraines, hypothyroidism, PMDD, nerve damage, herniated disc, ADHD, depression, anxiety, C-PTSD and severe insomnia.  

                          Roleplay is something I do for fun.  

                                  If it isn’t fun, I don’t do it.  

                                         If it’s stressing me out, I’ll avoid it.  

VI. I do graphic commissions.  

          I run @tuppencetrinkets where I post the millions of screencaps and 200x100 icons that I make.  The resources are free but donations are always appreciated as I pay about $40 in hosting / program fees a month.   My commissions are always pay what you can.  I hate setting prices because I want everyone to have pretties if they want them and I don’t know what anyone can afford at any given time.  I do everything from base icons to edited icons, backgrounds, headers, dividers, promos, videos, you name it.  I try to be quick with turnaround but again – sometimes I just can’t be.

VII.  I am fine with plotting things out in advance or winging it.  I really don’t care, whatever you are more comfortable with is fine with me.

               I like all kinds of plots.  I like fluffy things, slice of life, broships, frenemies, enemies, familial, found family, long arcing, one shot throwaway, dark and twisted, you name it plots.  I will not write n*ncon or anything nsfw themed /even hinted at with minor characters and I won’t write any explicit child death etc. but most everything else is fair game.

VIII.  You can throw a million memes at me any time you want to.

IX.  You can throw any and all starters at me any time you want to.

                I’m not necessarily mutual exclusive but I don’t guarantee I’ll respond to memes or starters from non-mutual blogs.

X. I use icons, headers, promos etc. that I make myself 99% of the time.  Please do not use any of my edited graphics.  All base icons I use are free and available on my resource blog.  

XI. I use small text and my icons are 200x100 with empty space to make them 540x130 so that they don’t stretch out on mobile.  I prefer not heavily edited replies in terms of font variance and colors but really don’t care that much.

XII.  I’ve probably forgotten relevant things but, who knows.

XIII.  No drama.  Period.  I’m not interested.  

XIV.  I’m here for fun.  I’m really pretty easy going.  If you have any questions feel free to toss them into my inbox!

[gaysindistress]

LOVED the bucky imagine with them having a secret crush on each other, and y/n confessing before her date❤️ But there was WAY TOO LITTLE GROVELING😭 I need Bucky to be begging her for forgiveness after all he made her go through. I mean, SHE WAS HAVING PANIC ATTACKS FOR GOD SAKE. If you make a part 2, please include some grovelling for my sanity❤️

Hey babes,

It’s time we have a discussion about the expectations surrounding requests.

I’m very grateful and appreciative of the ones that I’ve received as well as all of the new people and support. With this influx, I’ve noticed a few things that I feel need to be addressed when it comes to requests. Id like to acknowledge that the overwhelming majority of people have been very kind and understanding. I’d also like to say that this is not meant to be negative or an attack on anyone and I was already planning on adding a similar note to my guidelines. Moving right along…

First and foremost, requests are not a guarantee.

I do my best to write all of them however I can’t guarantee that I will as not everything will work with my muse. I don’t think it’s fair to post a fic that isn’t up to my personal standards simply because it’s a request. I want everything on my blog to reflect the love and respect I have for writing which means I’ll only post what I feel is good quality. I’m also not going to force myself to write something just because someone asked me to. Again it goes against my quality over quantity rule (which applies my non requested fics as well).

Secondly, writing is a hobby for me.

As much as I would love to get paid to write and post, I don’t. This is all done simply because i want to. I have a very busy life outside of tumblr so my free time is limited and there’s even less to devote to my blog. I also started posting as a form of self care and in order to keep it that way, I give myself limits on how much time I devote to writing and working on my blog. Obviously I’m more active some days than others or not at all and that is okay. Personally I would much rather see a writer go MIA for a few weeks so they can recoup than watch them lose their passion entirely and disappear.

Third and finally, remember to always be kind and have empathy.

It’s easy to forget that there is person behind the username and profile picture. Even though our words may be typed, they still have an effect on people and we have to be mindful of that.

In regard to this particular ask, I truly believe that this person only meant to give feedback and did not intend to insult me. However the fact still remains that I was genuinely hurt by it and even cried when I first read it. Now that I’ve had the day to reflect, I understand what they were trying to say despite the poor word choice which leads me to my next point.

While I don’t believe it wasn’t meant to be hurtful, this is a backhanded compliment and not how you give appropriate feedback. Giving feedback can be very complicated because it’s easy to say and mean one thing but it comes across the complete opposite way.

If you’re going to give someone feedback, always make sure to say something positive it is important to let people know what they are doing well addition to what needs improvement. It doesn’t have to be an elaborate essay where their usage of tone words is analyzed. It can be as simple as commenting on how well they described the setting.

Second; be specific about what needs improvement. If you’re making food and ask someone to taste it because something isn’t right, you wouldn’t want them to just say “yeah it’s missing something.” You would want to be told exactly what is missing and how much to add. The same thing applies to writing. Tell the writer exactly what needs improvement and be prepared to explain your thoughts. In this case, “add more groveling” is the “yeah it’s missing something.” There aren’t specifics for me to focus on and brainstorm for. Making specific recommendations like “I would like to see more of the panic attacks so the audience gets a better feel for how deeply his behavior affected her” are going to give a writer more to work with and thus produce better results.

And lastly a writer is not required to accept feedback. I feel like this is pretty self explanatory; feedback is someone’s opinion and no one is required to listen to it.

All in all, I’m not trying to bash this anon and I hope that if they read this, they don’t see it that way. Had this not been an anon, I would have addressed it privately and just added something simple to my guidelines like I said in the beginning.

Once again thank you for all of the support and encouragement. It means so much more than I can ever say 💕

Love,

Rose 🌹

[rome-roy]

wowowow fun :) my only remaining friend from high school (and real life) has now blocked me on instagram and privated her account. I guess so she can chat shit about me! And like I’m sad to lose her but also…

I’m definitely in the wrong myself but to just drop me? ok sure… that’s reasonable.

I want to rant for a sec. You don’t need to read this but feel free to tell me if I’m the asshole. I know I am a bit but… yeah. I feel guilty but not enough to warrant her reaction? Maybe?

So we’ve been friends since HS, but I left school and moved away. So we’ve kept in contact on and off over the years. Saw each other rarely but it sometimes it happened. I could probably count on my hands the amount of times we’ve seen each other (less than 10.)

One thing that is clear about me to anyone and most certainly her: I am terrible at staying in contact.

I’ll see a message and say I’ll respond later. And then it gets too late. Weeks go by. Most of the time I completely forget about it. And I end up not responding at all. I dislike this about myself. A lot of the time I don’t respond because I need time to think about the message or time where I don’t have distractions around me. The only time I can guarantee this is when I go to bed, and sometimes I’m just too sleepy or want to chill. Tough cycle to break.

Anyway, she knows this about me. I’ve been like this since high school. She’s never been mad about it, or at least she’s not said anything. We usually fall back into old ways before I lapse again.

Before lockdown (or the year of?) we decided to try writing some scripts together. We’ve been trying to do it for ages, but it’s hard to pin me down. I have no schedule, I cannot ever guarantee her a time in which we can both hop online and write. This especially got harder when she moved to Korea. Like where my life is at the minute… I don’t think anyone really understands how it makes me feel and how I feel I can’t do anything. I cannot dedicate my time because I don’t know what’s happening week to week, and I don’t want to inconvenience anyone else around me. I already feel like such an inconvenience to them.

ANYWAY, I told her this a few months ago, along with the fact that I’m just not feeling the story anymore and I’m struggling to be creative. I hoped that would be it, I’d have some space from the writing till I was able to think again. I was also kinda annoyed that we weren’t starting from scratch like we said we would but just editing what we had. We both agreed it needed to be completely rewritten… but no? She sent me a couple of voice notes, I didn’t have the time to listen to them straightaway so I put it off… we know how this goes.

So instead of just leaving me be for a bit she continues to message me. She messages me when she sees I’m online. Keeps trying to catch me out. And this kinda pisses me off. I don’t like that behaviour, just because I’m online doesn’t mean I have to talk to her. She doesn’t know what’s going on in my life. Having constant access to people online has fucked the world up a little - being online does not mean fully available and at your disposal. Oftentimes I wouldn’t actually be online. I’d click onto messenger to check the family groupchats and then go off… but it still says you’re active for a little while after that. I guess it’ll say you’re active if you have the tab open too. Not only did I not have time to start up a conversation with her but her trying to make me respond to her made me put it off even more.

Eventually she just messages me and says, to sum it up, ‘bye.’ I’m like… okay so… is this it?? She’s dropping me? None of my behaviour is out of the ordinary for me, I’ve never argued with her, never said a bad word, never fallen out with a friend before. After a few weeks she tries to catch me out some more. There’s a bit of attitude to her words and I’m not about that.

ON MY BIRTHDAY she posts a very plain ‘happy birthday!’ on my page. I honestly thought she wouldn’t bother. I can’t avoid it any longer, I say thanks and that I’m going to reply to her and explain. But it’s my birthday, I plan to do it the next day. No. That night she messages me after seeing I’m online and says ‘I thought we were friends??’ I’m tired and honestly just doing a quick scroll on insta before bed but I write back to give a brief summary and that I’ll reply in full later because I’m tired. I tell her that I see I’ve caused her pain and how terrible I feel, which I 100% do. She doesn’t respond straightaway so I go to sleep.

Next day I see she’s said that ‘it hasn’t caused [her] pain it’s just fucking annoying, do [I] want to write with [her] or not?’ and… I have been so so tempted to say ‘do you want a friend or do you a writing partner?’ but I can’t bring myself to do it. Because this is the only reason she’s been messaging me - so that I will write with her. The only reason she’s been in touch with me for a long while. I’ve been telling myself that people only want me around so they can use me for something that they want. She only talks to me because she wants to write this thing, for her benefit. Never about me, never reaching out for me. She has a fancy to start writing this again and that’s when she reaches out. That message really highlights that point to me, and the fact that the potential that she may have lost my friendship hasn’t actually caused her pain? But it’s been hurtful to me thinking she’s done? Like… do you actually care about me or do you just want me so you can write?

The story isn’t even what we started out with and has been really dominated by her and she’s never truly listened to anything I’ve said. I’ve tried to make her follow structures (and I hate structures usually but we really needed them) and suggested helpful things. It kinda means nothing but I do have a masters in creative writing, I know what I’m talking about. Yet all my suggestions go unfollowed.

She has not been the greatest friend to me (her 2019 birthday is a while other story), but I still love her. So I’m hurt. But in some respects I do wonder whether it’s for the best to maybe let her go. She’ll be fine, I know. She has lots of other friends and she has a boyfriend now. I don’t think she needs me… and I don’t think she’s wanted me for me in quite some time.

It’s a bit much for her to just go and block me. Like. I’m literally doing nothing. I’m not even posting, haven’t watched her insta story in a long time. But whatever. If she wants to go drastic and cut me out of her life like that so be it. I wonder if she’s going to unfriend me next?

I do plan on messaging her, maybe it will end up being the last time, but I don’t want to argue. I hate arguments so much, especially when we should be able to communicate like civilised adults.