#I’ll come back and do other characters and big storylines later lol

[podsn]

Hello friends I’m here today to give you this Batwoman sketch. Not as detailed as my Nightwing one but I still like how it came out.

[bellaireland1981]

Starting Over | 5

Summary: You come home to work to find your husband of three years in bed with your supposed best friend. It’s the wake up call you finally needed to take your two year old daughter and get the hell out of Texas. With nowhere to go you head to your big brother in San Diego. The sagger squad takes you under their wings, and shows you what having a family means. You get a fresh start… will you find your happily ever after?

Characters: Jake “hangman” Seresin x Sister! Reader, Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x Seresin! Reader (Eventually), Hangman x Phoenix (eventually) , Adorable OC Gracie!   The Dagger squad

Word Count: 11.1k -- not even sorry lol. Giving you more for being patient!

Warnings: Angst, cheating husband, emotional abuse, eventual fluff, smut in later chapters, Sweet uncle Jake, Adorable Rooster with a toddler… if I miss any please let me know.

A/N: I don’t own the characters or storyline for Top Gun Maverick. All OC’s are mine. I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION FOR ANYONE TO COPY OR REPOST MY WORK TO ANY OTHER PLATFORM! DON’T STEAL! Reblogs, likes and comments ALWAYS welcomed. THANK YOU @waywardodysseys​ and  @beyondthesefourwalls​ as always for reading over my work and helping me flush out ideas!!

Taglist is open! If I missed anyone who asked to be tagged, please fill out this GOOGLE FORM  to be added. It’s getting to hard to keep track of asks.

CH 1  CH 2  CH 3  Ch 4

True to his word, the following Monday, Bradley was on your doorstep bright and early ready for babysitting duty. Jake was getting Gracie breakfast while you finished getting ready for court. You were meeting your lawyer a half hour before you were due in court to go over everything. She wanted to discuss correspondence she’d received from Trent’s lawyer before going into the hearing.

“It’s open!” Jake yelled when Bradley rang the doorbell.

Bradley came through the front door as you were walking out to the living room. You picked out a green sheath dress with a navy blue fitted ¾ length sleeve jacket and navy pumps. You pulled your hair back into a low messy bun with tendrils hanging around your face. You’d kept the makeup to a minimum, not wanting to have to worry about any running in the event you cried.

“You look really pretty, Y/N.” Bradley said, offering you a sweet smile, “You feeling ok for today?”

“Thank you,” You smiled back. “I’m nervous… like…REALLY… nervous.”

“You’ve got nothing to worry about, Sweetheart.” He said, “It’s going to go your way. No judge would rule in favor of that douche.”  

“I just want the whole thing over and to be free, but I have a bad feeling it’s going to drag out.” You said. “I can’t thank you enough though for taking off work to stay with Gracie. It means so much to me.”

“It’ll be over soon, and all in your past.” He said, “You don’t have to thank me, Sweetheart. I get to spend the day with a Princess. That’s better than work.”

“Even when work involves flying F-18s at stupid speeds?” You challenged, smiling.

“Even then.” He confirmed, not missing a beat.

“Hey Rooster.” Jake said, poking his head out from the kitchen. “I made extra if you’re hungry. Gracie is finishing up her waffles now. I just have to change shirts quickly… in hindsight, I should have known better than to get dressed before serving waffles and syrup to a toddler.”

“Rookie move, Bubs.” You laughed, “We’ve got a little time though so go ahead and change, I’ll hold down the fort here.”

“Then you’ll get sticky from the syrup.” Jake pointed out.

“I’ll handle the syrup situation.” Bradley said, walking into the kitchen, “Go change. It’s my turn with Princess Gracie.”

“WOOSTA!” She exclaimed, holding up very sticky fingers and making grabby hands towards Bradley. “We pway?”

“Good Morning, Baby Girl.” He beamed at Gracie, “Are you all done eating? Or are you still hungry?”

“All done!” She said, “Up pwease!”

“Let me wipe the stickiness from your fingers and face then we’ll play ok?” He compromised, wetting a cloth under the kitchen faucet, before picking her up.

“Otay!” She agreed.

“I laid out some play clothes for her on her bed and the diaper bag is packed if you wanted to go anywhere, the keys to my car are hanging up on the hook by the door.” You said, “You can move the car seat over to your Bronco if you’d rather drive that.”

“We’ll be just fine.” He promised, “Princess Gracie and I are going to have lots of fun today.”

“Thank you again, Bradley.” You said, smiling, “It really means a lot to me.”

“Sweetheart, please stop thanking me.” He laughed, “I will never turn down a playdate with this sweet girl.”

“See, Rooster,” Jake teased, coming in with a clean shirt on and tucked in. “Your dating life is picking up after all.”

“Jakey, be nice!” You admonished your big brother. “Your tie is crooked too, come here.”

“He’s not wrong.” Bradley laughed good naturedly, “My dating life is nonexistent… but I have a feeling hanging out with Gracie is better than any date I’ve been on recently.”

“Well mine is and will remain nonexistent for the foreseeable future.” You said, tying Jake’s tie so it was straight. “There, all better.”

“Thanks Tulip.” He said, flashing you a soft smile, “Let’s go get this first step to your freedom taken care of. Gotta get you back up on that horse.”

“I don’t think that’s the right analogy here, Jakey.” You said, rolling your eyes.

“I think it’s absolutely the right analogy, Sweetheart.” Bradley winked.

“I love you, Gracie Girl.” You said, leaning in to kiss your daughter, “Be good for Bradley. Mommy will see you this afternoon when we get back.”

“Wuv you Mommy!” Gracie said smiling, perfectly content to have time with her ‘Woosta’.  

You and Jake arrived at the courthouse and were greeted by your lawyer.

“Thank you for meeting me before we go in.” She said, “I have a small meeting room booked, we can go in and go over what we have so far.”

“Thank you.” You replied, following her to the room. Once inside, you remembered to introduce her to Jake. “This is my brother Jake.”

“It’s nice to meet you. I’m Lauren Kennedy.” She replied, shaking Jake’s hand.

“Nice to meet you too, Ma’am.” Jake smiled, “Thank you for all you’re doing for my sister.”

“I am absolutely happy to help.” She replied, “Especially after some interactions I’ve had with Trent and his lawyer… I’m even happier to help.”

“Is this going to be drawn out?” You asked, your shoulders tensing with the prospect of being stuck longer in this situation. “I don’t even care if I walk away with absolutely nothing. I just need to be free.”

“Not necessarily.” She said, offering a soft smile, “As we discussed last week, he did contest the divorce and also the same day countersued for custody. This, in itself is a contradiction and I would argue shows it’s all a power move on his part. I’ve had several conversations with the attorney that he has hired as well as a few rambling emails and voicemails from Trent himself since that initial contact.”

“He’s already admitted he never wanted Gracie and has since said so on voicemail.” Jake seethed, “That piece of shit doesn’t deserve Gracie. He’s never been involved in her life even when she was living under the same roof.”

“That admission will certainly help strengthen our already very strong case.” Lauren assured us. “If the judge grants the order of protection today, we will certainly use that to accelerate both the divorce and the custody case. I honestly don’t see this dragging out indefinitely, so please don’t get discouraged. Trent doesn’t strike me as someone with the means to keep this tied up in court. He is your typical playground bully. We push back hard enough, he’ll give up in favor of finding an easier target.”

“What if he comes out here and tries to take Gracie?” You asked, the fear suddenly choking you, “He can’t take my baby.”

“He’ll have to go through me.” Jake said, rubbing your back comfortingly, “It’ll be a cold day in hell before my Princess G ends up in his hands.”

“Hopefully today will help prevent that.” Lauren said, encouragingly, “Y/N, I promise you, I will do everything in my power to get you freed from this man in every way. Whether he contests the divorce or not, there are safeguards in place with the laws and we will use them. Him agreeing just makes it happen faster. In all of my years practicing family law, I have never seen a judge side with a parent showing so many red flags as Trent does, especially when the other parent is stable and established as the child’ sole caregiver. I need you to remember that the only questionable variable in this situation is the amount of time it takes to get it through. You will be divorced from this man, you will reclaim your life, Sweetie. I promise you that.”

“Thank you.” You replied, quietly. “I really do appreciate all you’re doing for me.”

“It’s absolutely my pleasure.” She smiled, “Let’s head on into the courtroom and get situated.”

“He isn’t here right?” You asked, suddenly scared to enter the courtroom. “Or his lawyer?”

“His attorney may be in attendance” She replied, “I would be surprised, being he is based out of Texas. If Trent is present, due to it being an order of protection hearing, we will do everything we can to maintain as much distance as possible. In the event he’s here and the order is approved, a deputy would escort you out of the courthouse ahead or behind Trent, upholding the distance ordered and to prevent illegal contact.”

“And I will be here with you every single step of the way, Tulip.” Jake promised, “I will never let him hurt you in any way ever again.”

In the end, Tent, thankfully, had not shown up. His lawyer Zoomed into the hearing on his behalf. After looking at all of the texts, reviewing the voicemails, and listening to your account of your marriage, the judge ordered a no contact order. All communication now had to officially go through lawyers. Trent was not allowed to text or call you and was not allowed within 500 feet of you. The order was temporary, but would hopefully be enough to allow you to get the divorce you needed and to start your life over. Your attorney said the order would help with the custody and divorce hearings. Trent’s lawyer had objected and insisted all of the evidence was a result of emotional distress you’d caused by leaving and taking your daughter out of state. You were thankful the judge hadn’t seen it that way.

“What are the next steps?” Jake asked, as you all left the courtroom. Even just this small victory took a load off of your shoulders. At least now he could be held in contempt of court if he contacted you or showed up on your doorstep.  “Can you file anything that legally separates them so she can start to rebuild her life while waiting on the divorce to go through?”

“Legally, they are already separated.” Lauren explained, “The moment we filed the intent to dissolve the marriage, they were legally separated. The next steps are getting a court date for the divorce and custody of Gracie. Since he’s contesting, it will need to go before a judge. The judge would normally order mediation to work out the divorce agreement but since Y/N only wants custody and nothing from the marital home or any monetary compensation, and in light of the no contact order in place as of today, the judge will be more inclined to waive the mediator and grant the divorce. Custody could be done the same day if we can get Trent to agree to vanquish his parental rights or to simply agree to you having full custody, Y/N.”

“So, the divorce is just a formality at this point, she’s already free of that piece of shit?” Jake clarified.

“The marriage is essentially on ‘hold’ until the divorce is finalized. Legally speaking though, yes, Y/N you are free to move on, Sweetie.” She replied. She smiled warmly, winking at you. “That includes dating.”

“I don’t think I’m quite ready for that yet.” You replied, offering a small smile, “I just want to focus on being a good mom to Gracie.”

“Tulip, you’ve already nailed that.” Jake assured you, “You’re the best mom and Princess G is so lucky to have you as her mommy.”

“I love you, Jakey.” You said, hugging him.

“Love you too, Tulip.” He replied, hugging you back.

“Alright, I will continue to keep you posted” Lauden said, “I’ll be calling Trent’s lawyer again today to encourage his client to settle now and agree to dissolve the marriage rather than drag it out. If his lawyer is competent, he’ll know this is a losing battle on their end. It’s to their advantage to settle and not let the judge set the terms.”

“Thank you. For everything.” You said.

“You’re very welcome.” She replied, “Keep your chin up, this will be over and just a bad memory in no time at all.”

After leaving the courthouse, Jake decided to treat you to lunch before heading home. He took you to one of his favorite Mexican restaurants, knowing you’d love it too.

As you sat eating your lunch you could tell Jake was thinking about something. “I can see the wheels turning in your head, Bubs.” You laughed, “What’s on your mind?”

“Just thinking about what your lawyer said.” Jake said.

“Which part?” You asked, “She said a lot today.”

“About being free to start over.” He replied slowly, “Dating and all that.”

“No need to go into overprotective brother mode, Jakey.” You smiled, “I meant it when I said I don’t think I’m ready. I don’t really trust my own judgment anyway.”

“Do you trust mine?” He asked.

“Of course I do, Jakey.” You replied, “What’s going on in that head though?”

“OK, hear me out.” He said. “If someone were interested in dating you and you were interested in them… would you trust my judgment on whether they were a good fit or not?”

“Yes.” You replied, confused where this was coming from, waiting on him to elaborate.

“Ok.” He smiled, relaxing. “So what do you think you want to do first, now that you’re well on your way to freedom?”

“A job.” You replied, shaking your head at your brother. Sometimes he was so hard to get a read on. “Penny offered me a part time job. If she’s still serious about it, I want to accept. I just need to find daycare.”’

“I can help with that!” He assured you, “I think getting out of the house and being around adults will be good for you.”

“Jake you can’t take Gracie to base” You laughed, “She can’t be your WSO at 2 years old.”

“I know that.” He said, playfully rolling his eyes, “I can look into daycare on base though, or at least ask around for recommendations. Being around other kiddos will be good for her too.”

After lunch you headed home to relieve Bradley of babysitting duties. Jake hung the keys to the truck on the hook by the door when you walked in, immediately reaching up to loosen and untie the tie he wore to court.

“Hey…how did it go?” Bradley asked cautiously.

“It went well!” Jake replied, “That piece of trash can’t contact Tulip anymore!”

“That’s fantastic, Y/N!” Bradley said, flashing a bright smile at you, “How are you feeling?”

“So much relief.” You replied, smiling back at him, “My lawyer also said that this will help us in the custody and divorce proceedings.”

“Even better.” He said, “This calls for a celebration! How about drinks at the Hard Deck tomorrow night?”

“I don’t have a babysitter for Gracie.” You replied, “But you all can go and celebrate for me!”

“Tulip, we can’t celebrate without you when you’re the reason for the celebration.” Jake laughed, “We will find a sitter for Gracie and we will go for a bit.”

“Ok.” You agreed. “Going out does sound fun. It’s been awhile. I’m going to go change and start getting stuff put together for dinner. Bradley, you’re joining us… if you don’t have plans. It’s the least I can do for you taking a day off to stay with Gracie.”

“I will happily accept dinner.” He replied, “But it’s because you’re cooking is amazing and too good to say no to, not because you owe me anything for spending time with that sweet Princess. She was good as gold and we had fun.”

“Well, thank you all the same.” You said, kissing his cheek before heading to the bedroom to change.

***** Jake’s POV *****

“Thanks, Rooster.” Jake said, removing his tie completely now and slumping down on the couch. “I really appreciate everything you’ve done for Y/N and Gracie.”

“Look, I know we definitely started off on the wrong foot but, like we keep reminding Y/N…this is a family.” Bradley said, “For me, it’s the only one I’ve got. So there really isn’t much I wouldn’t do for you, Jake. And let’s be real, 5 minutes in her presence and Gracie had me wound tightly around her adorable, chubby little finger.”

“She has a way of doing that.” Jake laughed, “She’s had me hooked since she drew her first breaths.”

“Y/N is the same way.” Bradley said, treading carefully, unsure how Jake would react to knowing he was falling hard for his sister.

“She’ll kill me for this…” Jake said, sitting up and turning to face Bradley, “Here’s the thing. She’s kinda fragile at the moment and very unsure of herself…actually said she doesn’t trust her own judgment when it comes to guys and dating now… but she does trust me. And I trust YOU. I know you’ve got a thing for Y/N. I’ve seen the way you look at her. I’ve also seen the way she looks at you when she thinks nobody is looking. What’s more… I’ve seen how much you care about Gracie.  Those girls are the most important people in my life, Bradley. They’re the only actual family I’ve got. I just need you to know…to really know… what you’re getting into. If you’re not playing the long game here where my sister and niece get their fairytale ending… I’m asking you to bow out now. I failed her once in my role as her big brother and protector. I can’t fail her again.”

“Jake, I genuinely already care deeply about them both.” Bradley admitted. “I would never do anything to intentionally or knowingly hurt either of them. I’d rather burn in than do that. Just to be clear though, because I’m not trying to get my face rearranged at any point… are you saying that you’re actually OK with the fact that I’m falling for your sister?”

“You’re probably the only guy I WOULD trust with her heart.” Jake shrugged, smiling, “And now that you’ve confirmed you do in fact have feelings for her…what do you plan to do about it?”

“Honestly, I don’t know.” Bradley admitted, “And this isn’t me ‘being safe on a perch’. I just don’t wanna screw this up or spook her.”

“I appreciate that.” Jake replied, “Me giving you shit in the air about playing it safe doesn’t mean I can’t see the value in being cautious and taking things slow when it matters. Just… not too slow. The lawyer even said she can get started building her life and even mentioned dating. She’s legally separated if that’s what is holding you back.”

“I don’t know that the military cares about legal separations, man…” Bradley said, “Pretty sure it’s still against the code… but… I don’t think it’s against the code to spend time with a friend and her adorable little girl. Especially when I am in fact, playing the long game.”

“Good to know.” Jake said, “On that note. I’m going to change quickly. Are you hanging around for dinner?”

“Yeah, there’s no way I’m passing up more time with those two…and a home cooked meal.” Bradley replied, smirking, “And I guess you’re alright to hang out with too.”

“Asshole.” Jake laughed, getting up and heading upstairs to change. Bradley laughed at his retreat.

*** Your POV ***

After changing into a pair of cutoff jean shorts and a Texas Longhorns t-shirt, you made your way out of your room. Before heading to the kitchen to start meal prepping you peeked into Gracie’s room to check on her quickly, smiling at the sight of her curled up sleeping soundly.

“You must have worn her out this morning.” You said, smiling at Bradley who was still seated on the couch. “She’s out like a light still.”

“We played pretty hard.” Bradley said, “Lots of chasing, flying, tea parties, and even went for a walk around the block.”

“Flying, huh?” You asked, laughing. “Starting her young?”

“Yup!” He replied, “Gotta get her used to those G’s. That little princess is fearless though. She loves to be tossed up in the air and completely trusts that you’ll catch her.”

“Believe it or not, she’s only been as outgoing as she is since coming here.” You said, “Back home she was always painfully shy and quiet. I only got to see this version of her when it was just the two of us.”

“Seriously?” He asked, shocked. Gracie had taken to him instantly and he’d never experienced the shy girl being described. “I can’t even picture that… she’s so full of life, full speed ahead.”

“Well it helps that it was love at first sight with you.” You smiled warmly, “She claimed you from the start.”

“The feeling is quite mutual.” He replied, holding your gaze. “Her mom is working her way in too.”

You felt butterflies erupt in your belly, your heart rate picked up and you could feel heat spreading over your body. You weren’t really sure how to respond. You definitely liked the man, but was it really fair to him to be saddled with a complicated mess like yourself?

“I can see the wheels turning, Sweetheart.” he said gently, offering a warm smile that reached his eyes. “No pressure. I know you’ve got a lot going on right now. All the cards on the table though, I really like you… a lot. You know I’m crazy about Gracie. If or whenever you’re ready, if you’re interested, I want you to know that so am I.”

“I like you too…” You admitted quietly, “More than I should considering the circumstances. It’s just… Bradley, I’m a mess. You deserve so much more than someone who doesn’t have their shit together. Hell, I don’t even have a job. I’m literally mooching off of my brother right now.”

“Hey.” He said, taking your hands and turning you so that you’re facing him. “First of all, I’d be willing to bet a paycheck that if Jake heard you talk like that he’d blow a gasket. Secondly, Sweetheart you’re not a mess. You were stuck in a shitty marriage with a piece of shit that doesn’t deserve you and you were strong enough to get you and your daughter out and are taking steps to keep him out of your lives. Thirdly, and most importantly, you are  so incredible, so beautiful, intelligent, funny, an amazing mom, and I would be LUCKY to get to spend time with you and get to know you.”

He leaned down, placing a soft kiss on your cheek, then pulling back to look into your eyes, willing you to see yourself in his eyes. To believe what he was saying.

“Like I said before, Sweetheart,” He continued, “No pressure. I just really want to get to know you more and would love to spend time with you.”

“I would really like to spend time with you too.” You admitted.

“Then we will start there.” He smiled sweetly at you.

“Look who’s up?” Jake said, carrying Gracie into the room. “I peeked in to check on her and my little Princess was awake and ready to play again.”

“There’s my sweet Gracie Girl!” You beamed at your daughter, “Did you sleep well?”

“Hi Mommy” She smiled, still rubbing her eyes, “Woosta, we pway again?”

“Wow, I see where her priorities are now.” You laughed.

“Hi Princess,” Bradley chucked, “I will happily play with you again. Do you want to go outside to play?”

“Yes! Outside!” She happily exclaimed, then looked at Jake, “Unco Jakey pway too?”

“Of course, Princess G!” He replied, kissing her forehead. “Let’s get your shoes on and we’ll go out back. I think we need to get you a swing for the backyard… or a playhouse and a slide!”

“Jakey!” You exclaimed, “There is a perfectly good park within walking distance. We’re not putting in a playground in your backyard.”

“No fun, Tulip.” He pouted, “Princess G needs her own playground.”

“Lord help me,” You rolled your eyes playfully, “You’re going to spoil that child rotten.”

“Nope.” he replied, “Not possible.”

“If you two have her, I’m going to go get started on dinner prep.” You said, heading to the kitchen.

While the guys were out back running with Gracie, you pulled out everything you needed to make dinner. Before getting too involved in prepping though, you paused to make a snack for Gracie, knowing she’d be hungry after her nap. You peeled and sliced apples for her, cutting them into bite size chunks and placed them on a plate with a handful of mini pretzels and cubes of cheese. This way she had a choice of what she’d snack on and you knew Jake or Bradley would help her finish if need be. Grabbing a sippy cup with water, you made your way out back.

“Snack time for my little Princess.” You said, setting the plate and cup down on the outdoor table.

“What about our snacks?” Jake asked, winking.

“You can see if your niece will share with you.” You said, smirking at him, “If not, there’s more fruit and cheese in the fridge. And dinner isn’t too far off.”

“Need any help with anything?” Bradley asked, “I promise I’m slightly more competent than Jake in the kitchen.”

“That’s not setting the bar too high.” You teased. “Gracie would be sad if I took her new bestie away from her.”

“I’ll cover.” Jake said, winking at you knowinging. “Princess G! Rooster has to help Mommy cook dinner, wanna go for a walk around the block with me?”

“Yes!” She said, dropping the ball she’d been playing with. “Bye Mommy! Bye Woosta!”

“And just like that, Uncle Jakey is the favorite again.” Jake said, flashing a victory smile. “Let’s go, Princess G!”

“Stay with Uncle Jakey, Gracie.” You reminded her, “Hold his hand!”

“Kitchen assistant Bradshaw reporting for duty.” Bradley said as the two of you stepped into the kitchen.

“When you said you are slightly more competent than Jake in the kitchen… How much more competent are you talking?” You asked, “He makes decent breakfast food and knows his way around a grill.”

“I can cook, Sweetheart.” He laughed, “I’m not a huge fan of it and it’s just me I’ll pick up take out, but my mom made sure I could cook.”

“Ok then.” You replied, trying and failing to maintain a serious expression. “You’re in charge of cutting the potatoes and veggies. The potatoes just need to be cut into wedges,  the broccoli cut off the stalk, and the  zucchini and yellow squash need to be cut into small chunks. That’s all going onto a sheet pan to be roasted.”

“I can handle that.” He promised, “Cutting board and knife, please.”

You handed him the  needed equipment and the veggies before turning to get  the chicken ready.

“Where’d you learn to cook so well?” He asked as he started to cut the potatoes.

“Jake got us through until I was old enough to read and understand a cookbook.” You said, “We ate a lot of eggs and toast, hot dogs and mac n cheese, and  grilled cheese sandwiches before that. When I was in 4th grade I checked out a cookbook from the library and made Jake get the ingredients… first few meals were rough, but then I got the hang of it. After that, Jake made sure we had a well stocked kitchen… well as best as  he could given the lack of funds we really had to work with.”

“I can’t even imagine, Sweetheart.” He replied, “It was just mom and Me…occasionally Mav when he wasn’t deployed, but my mom made sure I had everything I needed. You and Jake had to raise yourselves. Did you have any other family?”

“Just each other.” You replied, “We learned early that we were all we had. Jake did all he could to make sure nobody had reason to call family services on us. We took care of each other and stayed out of our parent’s way. What was your mom like?”

“Amazing.” He replied, a soft smile forming on his lips. “She was so full of life and love. She was the fun neighborhood mom. There were always extra kids hanging around. I think her mission was to make sure every kid was well fed. She made everything we did together fun, even the mundane things like chores.”

“I’m so sorry you lost her.” You said, “She sounds incredible.”

“I definitely wish she was still alive, but I’m lucky I had her for the time I did.” He replied. “Her and my dad had such a deep and complete love. After he died she was kinda lost for a bit. I don’t remember much of that time since I was so young, but it was almost like she snapped out of it and threw herself fully into just being my mom and raising me. She never dated anyone after my dad died. That’s probably the only thing I’d change. She deserved to be happy.”

“Maybe raising you and being there for you was what made her happy?” You suggested, “She had her one true love, and rather than settling for something less than that, she just poured all of her love into her child.”

“Isn’t there a balance though?” Bradley asked, “And do we only get one true love per lifetime?”

“I’m the wrong person to ask about that.” You said sadly, “I’ve never really been able to see what a healthy love is supposed to look like. I clearly didn’t find it with Trent.”

“Maybe not romantic love, but you and Jake love each other and have a sibling bond that not many reach.” He said, “You’ve also nailed the whole Mom gig, Sweetheart. So that proves you don’t need to have had a ‘good’ example in order to be capable of it.”

“Were you always so smart?” You asked, a smile forming on your face, “Or is this a new development?”

“Always.” He smirked, “You should trust me on this one.”

“I’ll take it under consideration.” You teased, “In the meantime, keep choppin’. I need to put the veggies in at the same time as the chicken.”

“On it.” He smirked, winking.  He finished chopping the vegetables while you finished getting the chicken seasoned and on the cooking sheet.

Once everything was on the cooking sheets and in the oven you grabbed a couple of beers from the fridge and passed one to Bradley.

“Well done, kitchen assistant Bradshaw.” You smiled, “You can help me out anytime.”

“How about, I help you this Friday when the squad invades for dinner.” He suggested, “Then… you let me take you out to dinner on Saturday night, so you’re not having to cook.”

“I’d have to see if Jake has plans…” You said, “Unless we do an early dinner and at a kid friendly restaurant.”

“Sweetheart, I am completely on board with both of those options.” Bradley said, “We could even take her and have a beach day and then dinner in the evening. I’m sure the squad would take a beach day too if you’d be more comfortable with a group.”

“I’d be comfortable with just you too, Bradley.” You said, offering a smile.

“How about we see if Jake and Phoenix want to join us?” He suggested, “That way we can give them a gentle push together. And while we do that, we get to spend more time together, with Gracie as an added bonus.”

“I like that.” You replied. Then, deciding to be brave and trust not only yourself, but also your brother’s judgment in friends and most importantly in Bradley.  “I’d also like to spend time with you… just the two of us… if you’re willing to deal with complicated.”

“Complicated is good.” He smiled, moving to stand closer to you, his hand coming to gently push some hair from your face, “You’re worth complicated, Sweetheart.”

“We’re back!” Jake called from the living room.

“We back Mommy!” Gracie parroted her uncle. The pair made their way into the kitchen, Gracie hitching a ride on Jake’s back.

“Someone was lucky enough to get a piggy back ride from Uncle Jakey, I see.” You laughed.

“She made a solid case for why she should get a ride.” Jake shrugged, smiling.’

After dinner you got Gracie in the bath, letting her play in the warm water for a bit, while Jake and Bradley played a flying video game.

Once you had Gracie bathed and her pajamas on, you took her back out to the living room to let her play for a bit before you started her bedtime routine.

“You’d think you two got enough of that piloting stuff in your actual jobs.” You teased, sitting down in the oversized chair next to the couch. “Just can’t get enough of it huh?”

“This is different, Tulip.” Jake insisted, “We get to fly planes from different eras and hone our skills in different terrains.”

“And we get to blow stuff up.” Bradley added, smirking. “That’s fun too.”

“That’s more in line with what I figured.” You said, rolling your eyes playfully.

“Mommy, you wead book pwease?” Gracie said, bringing over one of her books.

“I will happily read you a book, Baby Girl.” You said, smiling at your little girl. “Do you want to go snuggle in your bed and read before it’s sleepytime?”

“Yes, pwease.” She agreed, rubbing her eyes. All of the playtime and fresh air wore her out.

“Say goodnight to Uncle Jakey and Bradley.” You said. You watched as they instantly paused their game, and turned their full focus on Gracie. It warmed your heart as it’s not something her father ever did.

“Night Unco Jakey.” Gracie said, hugging him first. “Wuv you.”

“I love you too, Princess G.” He replied, hugging her tightly, “Sweet dreams.”

“Night Woosta.” She says, climbing over into Bradley’s lap and hugging him. “Wuv you.”

“Goodnight, Princess.” He replied softly, holding her gently and hugging her back and dropping a soft kiss on her head. “I love you too.”

“We pway tomorrow?” She asked him.

“I have to work tomorrow, Sweetheart.” He answered, “But, I promise to come play with you again soon, OK?”

“Otay.” She agreed before hopping down and heading to her room.

***********

The rest of the week went pretty smoothly. You’d talked to Penny about the part time job she offered at the Hard Deck. She’d told you that it was yours and that she’d work around daycare for you. Amelia was willing to babysit once school was out for the summer, so you only needed a sitter part time for about a month. You were going to meet with her next week to figure out the hours and everything the job would entail.

Friday night was the squad dinner night, everyone loved the homemade pizzas. Bradley had arrived after work and had helped you make the pizzas. Gracie’s favorite night of the week was Friday when the squad was over. She loved having all the playmates.

“What time are we headed to the beach tomorrow?” Phoenix asked once everyone but Bradley had left.

“Probably mid morning, I’m guessing.” Jake said, “We can bring the pack n play and an umbrella so Gracie can nap at the beach.”

“It’s sweet seeing you with her.” Phoenix says, offering Jake a soft smile. He blushed, a smile forming on his face.

“Gracie is really good at wrapping Naval aviators around her little finger.” You said.

“Yes she is.” Bradley agreed. “She’s got me hooked.”

“She’s not the only one.” Phoenix said, smirking knowingly at Bradley.

“That I’ve already admitted to.” He said, winking at you.

“Hey, Nix” Jake said, “Feel like being on babysitting duty with me tomorrow night? We get to hang with a really sweet toddler. She’s lots of fun…”

“That sounds fun.” She said, it was now her turn to blush. “I’d love to.”

You and Bradley shared a conspiratory look. You really hoped spending time together would push the pair together.

The next morning Jake was loading the pack n play, umbrella and beach chairs into the truck while you pulled together snacks and a lunch for everyone. You’d packed the beach bag before going to bed the night before so all you needed to do was get dressed and get Gracie dressed.

“Alright, the truck is packed up. Phoenix and Bradley just got here. I’ll get Gracie changed.” Jake said, “Go get dressed so we can hit the beach.”

Fifteen minutes later you were ready. You’d opted for a simple blue two piece swimsuit, one of two you’d bought while shopping with Phoenix. You threw a pair of cut off jean shorts and a tank top over your suit and slipped on flip flops.

“Ok, I’m ready.” You said, pulling your hair into a messy bun, while walking into the living room. “I packed towels, food, drinks, sunscreen, toys… what am I forgetting?”

“I think you got it covered, Tulip.” Jake laughed, “Let’s go! Princess G, do you wanna ride with Uncle Jakey and Phoenix?”

“Ok, so we’re taking two vehicles.” You laughed.

“Yay! I wide wif Unco Jakey and Nix!” Gracie exclaimed.

“Let’s load up!” Jake said, scooping Gracie up onto his shoulders, making her giggle.

“He’s so adorable with her.” Phoenix told you, a soft look in her eyes.

You flashed her a knowing smile and grabbed your purse.  The three of you followed Jake and Gracie out to the vehicles.

“See y’all at the beach.” Bradley said, opening the passenger door for you.

“Such a gentleman.” You smirked when he got into the driver’s seat.

“My mom raised me well.” he said, chuckling.

“She sure did.” You smiled, looking at him over your sunglasses.

“You’re gonna be trouble, Sweetheart.” He laughed.

After pulling into the beach parking lot. Bradley helped Jake carry all of the big stuff to where you would set up for the day. While they got the umbrella up and the pack n play set up…which was amusing to watch… you and Phoenix grabbed Gracie and the rest of the stuff from the truck.

“We have to put sunscreen on you before you play, Gracie.” You said, kneeling down on the sand to apply the sunscreen. “Alright, play here for a little bit until it soaks into your skin.”

You pulled out a couple of her toys for her to play with while she waited. In the meantime, you pulled off the tank you’d put over your swimsuit, dropping it on the bag. You started to apply sunscreen to your own skin, not wanting to burn.

“I’ll get your back.” Bradley offered, his eyes wandering over you. You smiled, feeling heat creep over your neck and face, having nothing to do with the sun. You handed him the bottle.  “Turn around.”

You turned around so your back was to him. You had to bite back a moan when his warm, strong hands started rubbing the lotion into your back. He clearly knew what he was doing to you, judging by the smirk on his face once he’d finished.

“Your turn.” You replied, making a spinning motion with your finger to get him to turn around. “Shirt off, Flyboy.”

He laughed, complying with your order. He shrugged out of the Hawaiian shirt he had on and pulled off the white tank undershirt over his head, revealing a well toned, back and wide shoulders. You squeezed some sunscreen onto your hand and rubbed them together to warm the lotion before running your hands over his back, rubbing the lotion in thoroughly.

You smirked when you were done and he’d turned to you, his eyes betraying the effect your hands had on him. It was a boost to your confidence that you clearly needed.

“Mommy we swim?” Gracie asked, abandoning the toys she’d been playing with. “Pwease?”

“Absolutely, Sweet Girl!” You said, picking your little girl up. She was wearing a Disney Princess swimsuit with ruffles around the middle making it look like it had a tutu attached. You put the toddler sized life jacket on her, making sure it was secure. Someone would be holding her at all times in the water but you were always very cautious, having seen too many news stories of toddlers accidentally drowning.

“Let’s play in the water, Princess.” Bradley said, gently tapping Gracie’s nose with his finger, making her laugh.

You all headed to the water, Jake and Phoenix walking ahead of you, sending flirty looks back and forth between them. You glanced over to Bradley to see if he was noticing, but his whole focus was on you. You ducked your head, resting it against Gracie’s as you kept walking towards the water.

The four of you all took turns holding Gracie and spinning her the water. Jake and Bradley tossed her back and forth between them, dipping her as they caught her so her feet splashed the water. When she was tired of being in the water, you and Phoenix took her to shore to play with her sand toys, the two of you sitting in the sand to watch. Jake and Bradley stayed in the water, tossing a football back and forth.

“This was a good idea.” Phoenix said, “Thanks for inviting me.”

“This is probably the most fun I’ve had in… I don’t even know how long.” You admitted, “I’m really glad you’re here. It’s nice having a friend.”

“It’s even nicer not to be outnumbered by men.” Phoenix laughed, “I love my squad, but it’s a LOT of testosterone.”

“I can only imagine.” You said, “Just from what I’ve seen at our dinners and the zoo trip… they’re a lot to wrangle.”

“Worth it though.” She smiled, looking out at where the guys were now apparently locked in a water war.

“Definitely.” You agreed, your eyes on Bradley and his rippling muscles on display.

“He’s one of the good ones, Y/N.” She remarked, catching you staring at Bradley. “I know you’re going through it right now, and might not be fully ready, but know that it doesn’t get much better than Bradshaw. He’s safe. And I don’t know if you’ve noticed or not, but he’s gone for you and Gracie.”

“We actually talked… Monday after Jake and I got back from court.” You admitted. “He laid all the cards on the table. I really like him, Nat. A lot. He’s so easy to fall for. He’s amazing with Gracie… I know he’s one of the good ones…”

“But…?” She pushed, maintaining eye contact.

“I’m a mess. I come with a lot of baggage and I’m scared.” You said, “Not of him. I’m scared of being too much of shit show and dragging him down. He deserves so much more than that.”

“Sweetie, he might look like he’s got it all together, but that man comes with some pretty heavy baggage too.” She replied gently, “Rooster has some trust issues caused by Mav. They’re good now, but there’s history there. He also has baggage relating to everything that went down with his dad and seeing how it affected his mom. BUT…despite all that, he’s willing to take the risk and trust you with his heart. I can see it all over his face. You should also know, he’s never been like this with anyone before. He’s… different with you and Gracie. He’s settled… calm. All I’m saying is… if you feel the same about him, go with it, Y/N… trust him.”

“I think I’ve decided I am.” You said, “He’s taking me out tonight, which is why you and Jake are on babysitting duty.”

“I wondered about that.” She smiled, “Good. Just stay out of your head. Don’t think.”

“Just do.” You finished, laughing at the catchphrase that had taken over the Dagger squad.

“See? You fit right in.” She smirked, before pushing some sand towards Gracie, who was busy scooping the sand into her bucket.

“Speaking of giving guys a chance…” You said, leveling her with a look. “You should know that the same applies to you and my brother. Jake also doesn’t let many in, or let his guard down, yet around you…. He’s himself one hundred percent of the time. He trusts you to see the real Jake. The softer, sometimes insecure Jake. He LIKES you… a lot. It scares him though. He doesn’t want to screw up the friendship with you because it’s something he treasures dearly.”

“I really like him too.” She admitted, “A Lot. I keep trying to drop hints or show him, but I just assumed he wasn’t interested… that him being flirty is just Jake.”

“You’re both idiots.” You laughed, “Ok, so here’s what’s going to happen… tonight after Gracie is in bed, the two of you need to talk. I’ll have dinner delivered for you. My brother is oblivious, Nat… you can’t be subtle.”

“What if I freak him out and he really doesn’t want to try anything beyond friendship?” She asked, “We just got reassigned to Top Gun with the Dagger squad… I can’t put in for reassignment.”

“You’re not going anywhere!” You exclaimed, “This will work out. I promise. Have you seen him flirt with anyone else since you all came back from the mission? Has he hooked up with any females or left the bar with any? The answer to that is no… because Jake is completely on team Phoenix.”

“Mommy, I hungy.” Gracie said, looking up from her buckets.

“Ok, Sweet Girl,” You said, “Let's rinse off then go back to the blanket and Mommy will get you lunch.”

You picked up your sandy toddler and walked into the water with her, rinsing off the sand as best as you could. You’d have to wipe her down with the towel and some baby wipes before she could eat. You got Jake and Bradley’s attention, letting them know you were gonna get lunch stuff ready. Nodding, they made their way back to shore as well.

After everyone ate, Jake and Phoenix decided to take a walk for a bit. Gracie was starting to rub her eyes and get sleepy so you placed her in the pack n play under the umbrella, with a towel over her and she drifted off to sleep quickly.

You and Bradley settled down onto the blanket laid out under the beach umbrella next to the pack n play.

“This was a really good idea.” You told him, “It’s been an amazing day.”

“It really has.” He agreed. “I think our plan is working on Jake and Nat too, so added bonus.” “It is! She admitted to really liking him… and she’s been trying to subtly let him know.” You said, “I told her tonight she has to spell it out for him. Jake doesn’t always pick up on subtleties.”

“That’s the truth!” He laughed. “I have to admit though, Sweetheart, as much as I’m enjoying today and getting to see you in this amazing swimsuit… I’m really looking forward to taking you out to dinner tonight.”

“I’m really looking forward to it too.” You smiled, “But I’ve also been enjoying the view of you shirtless today. It’s kinda distracting.”

“Distracting huh,” He smirks, turning his body towards you.

“You know you’re hot, Flyboy.” You replied, playfully rolling your eyes.

“I’ve done alright, but I wouldn’t classify myself as ‘hot’, Sweetheart.” He said, averting his eyes.

“I thought you had to have good eyesight to fly those expensive planes.” You said, leaning over to nudge him gently.

“I mean, yeah…” He replied, looking back up at you with confusion in his eyes.

“I’m thinking maybe you need your vision checked, Lieutenant.” You teased, “If you can’t see that you’re incredibly good looking, I don’t know that you should be flying those planes.”

“Trust me, Sweetheart,” He said, leveling you with a steamy look, before allowing his eyes to wander, “There’s nothing wrong with my vision.”

Now it was your turn to avert your gaze, heat creeping over your body again. Even though you weren’t entirely sure what you were doing or where this was going, it felt really good to be noticed and to know that Bradley was attracted to you.

The warmth of the day and the sound of the waves lulled you into a drowsy state, and at some point relaxed you to the point of falling asleep. Bradley watched you, committing this moment to his memory. He was no match for the sun and waves though either, and ended up falling asleep next to you, one arm tucked under his head as a pillow the other ended up draped over your stomach.

“Do we wake them up?” Jake asked, taking in the scene in front of him when him and Phoenix returned from their walk.

“Nah, let them sleep.” She replied, smiling, “It’s sweet. They’re both completely relaxed, not a care in the world.”

“I doubt Tulip has let her guard down like this in a very long time.” Jake agreed, “It’s nice to see. He’s one of the only guys I’d trust with my sister.”

“She really likes him.” Phoenix said, “A lot. She’s scared that she’s got too much baggage though. I set her straight on that.”

“Good.” He replied, “Thank you, Nix. It means a lot to me that you’ve become her friend. She needs it.”

“You don’t have to thank me, Jake.” She replied, “I really like your sister. She’s easy to be friends with.”

Jake grabbed his phone from the bag he’d set it in and opened the camera app, capturing the moment before him. Phoenix chuckled, shaking her head.

“Blackmail?” She asked

“Nope. Just figured they’d want this moment someday.” Jake admitted, smiling. “Those two are going to be each other’s endgame. Princess G will get to grow up with two parents that love her and she’ll see what it’s supposed to look like. She won’t grow up like we did.”

“Jake, I can’t imagine what it was like for you and Y/N growing up” Phoenix said, “But the two of you grew up to be incredible people despite it all. Just… don’t doubt that, ok?”

“Thank you, Nat.” He replied softly, “You don’t know how much that means.”

After Gracie’s nap, and yours and Bradley’s impromptu nap, everyone spent a little more time in the water and playing with Gracie in the sand before rinsing off in the outdoor showers and loading the vehicles again.  

Bradley dropped you off, promising to return at 6 to get you for your dinner date. Phoenix had brought a change of clothes with, so she showered in Jake’s shower while you showered and got ready in the main bathroom.

You weren’t really sure where Bradley planned to take you, so you decided to wear a sundress with a cardigan in case it got cooler once the sun set and paired it all with strappy sandals to complete the look. You left your hair down after showering, deciding to just dry it and let it hang in soft waves.

You left your room to head out to the living room. Gracie was playing with her toys, freshly bathed and in jammies. Jake, haven given her a bath while you were getting ready.

“You look gorgeous, Y/N!” Phoenix said, once you’d entered the room.

“Thank you,” You replied, smiling, “I’m not sure where we’re going…so I didn’t want to go too fancy or too casual.”

“You look beautiful, Tulip.” Jake said, coming in from the kitchen with drinks for himself and Phoenix. “I ordered pizza, it’ll be here in 45 minutes.”

“Sounds great.” Phoenix said, “Does Gracie like pizza? I can make her something else if she doesn’t.”

“She loves pizza.” You assured her, “Hopefully she doesn’t give y’all too much trouble falling asleep tonight.”

“I’m sure with all the fresh air she got today, she’ll pass right now.” Jake laughed, “But you’re not allowed to worry or even think about that while you’re out. Enjoy the time with Rooster. We’ve got this under control.”

“Thank you for taking care of her.” You replied, “You’re a fantastic uncle… and the best big brother.”

“Mommy, come pway?” Gracie asked from her play area.

“Mommy is going to go out for a bit with Bradley for dinner.” You said, walking over to her and crouching down next to her, “You’re going to stay here with Uncle Jakey and Nix.”

“We’re going to have so much fun, Princess G.” Jake said.

The doorbell rang and Jake stepped over to open the door.

“Come on in.” he said, “Lookin’ sharp, Rooster.”

“Thanks, Hangman.” He chuckled, stepping into the house.

“Woosta!” Gracie exclaimed, running over to him. You smiled, standing back up, as Bradley picked her up.

“Hi, Princess.” He chuckled, hugging her to him. She immediately laid her head down on his shoulder, snuggling into him. Unable to resist, you pulled your phone out and snapped a quick picture. He looked up, flashing a warm smile towards you. “You look beautiful, Sweetheart.”

“Thank you,” You replied, “You look pretty hot yourself.”

“Alright, you two.” Jake said, “It’s time for our slumber party with Princess G. No Moms and Roosters allowed.”

“Sounds like you’re going to have so much fun, Princess.” Bradley said, walking with her towards you.

“Come give Mommy hugs and kisses, Sweet Girl.” You said, reaching for her. She put her arms out for you to take her and immediately snuggled into you.

“Wuv you Mommy.” She said softly.

“I love you too Baby Girl.” You replied, “Be good for Uncle Jakey and Nix ok?”

“Otay.” She said, then looked back at Bradley, “Wuv you Woosta.”

“I love you too, Princess.” He replied, leaning down to drop a kiss on her head.

“Have her home by midnight.” Jake said, “No funny business. I’d hate to have to kick your ass.”

“Wow, Jakey.” You laughed, shaking your head.

“Ok, Dad, let the kids go on their date.” Phoenix laughed. Shaking her head at Jake. “You two go have fun, we’ve got it under control.”

“Thanks, Nat.” You replied, hugging Gracie again before handing her to Jake. “Thanks Jakey.”

“It’s not a problem, Tulip. I get time with two beautiful ladies. It’s a win win.” Jake replied.

After saying goodbyes Bradley leads you out to the Bronco, opening the passenger door and helping you up before going around to the driver’s side and sliding in.

“I asked Jake for ideas of where to go… I didn’t wanna blow my one shot…” He said, giving you a sheepish look, “So I hope you like the Italian place he suggested.”

“Bradley, there is zero chance of you blowing this.” You assured him, “Italian sounds great.”

He visibly relaxed as he backed out of the driveway and started the journey to the restaurant.

“I feel like I’m the one that should be nervous.” You teased, “It’s been… a while….since I’ve been on a date.”

“Are you? Nervous?” he asked, glancing over at you.

“I was.” You admitted, “Getting ready, I was kinda a mess. But I’m not now. I feel comfortable with you… safe. You have a calming presence.”

He reached across the seat, taking your hand in his own, “You have no idea how much that means to me, Sweetheart.” He said softly, “I feel the same… being with you is calming. I love getting to spend time with you and Gracie, especially after a crazy week on base. I live for Fridays.”

“You never have to wait for Fridays,” You said, “Gracie and I would love to see you any day of the week.”

“You’re killing me, Sweetheart.” He groaned, “I know we need to take this slowly, but I didn’t realize how difficult that would be. I fall deeper every minute we get to spend together.”

“I’m sorry, Bradley.” You said, a mixture of feelings swirling inside you. You were happy and felt good that he was just as affected as you were, but feelings of guilt surfaced because of all of your baggage and the fact that you were still technically married was holding everything back. He needed someone who was free to love him the way he deserved without being bogged down.

“Hey, Sweetheart, no.” He said, squeezing your hand reassuringly, “Don’t apologize. I will happily go as slow as you need and wait as long as needed for the opportunity to be with you. You are worth it, Y/N.”

You gave him a soft smile, squeezing his hand back.

“You shouldn’t have to wait around for someone to figure their life out though. It’s not fair to you.” You said quietly.

“Sweetheart, some things in life are very much worth the wait.” He replied, “YOU are one of those things. I WANT to wait and be here when you’re ready. I want nothing more than a shot with you and Gracie.”

“You have more than a shot, Bradley.” You replied, deciding to trust in his words and in what Natasha had told you earlier at the beach, “Just promise if it gets to be too much, you’ll tell me. I don’t want to hold you back.”

“I promise.” He said, flashing you a bright smile that went all the way to his honeyed eyes, “It won’t be too much, but I promise to keep open communication with you. Do you promise to tell ME if it’s too much, if you need more or need me to back off?”

“I promise.” You said, “But I don’t want or need you to back off.”

You arrived at the restaurant, Bradley once more opening your door and keeping his hand on the small of your back as you walked in. Once seated you ordered drinks before the waiter left you to look over menus. The night went smoothly, falling into easy conversation with Bradley. The two of you talked about everything and anything that came up.  The more you learned about the aviator the further you fell for him. You knew you were dangerously close to falling in love with him.  

“That was so good.” You sighed, taking a final bite of the chocolate cake you and Bradley had ordered to share. “I’m so full.”

“It was pretty good.” Bradley agreed, “I like that layered cake you made last week better though. That was amazing.”

“That’s Gracie’s favorite too.” You smiled, “I’ll have to make it again soon…for two of my favorite people.”

“I have it on good authority that you’re our favorite person too.” He replied, reaching across the table to gently take your hand in his again. “I’ve really enjoyed tonight, Sweetheart… not really ready for it to end… How would you feel about taking a walk? Or if you want, we can go to the Hard Deck.”

“I’m really enjoying it too.” You replied, “How about we walk on the beach near the Hard Deck and if we decide to get a drink we’ll be right there?”

“That sounds perfect.” He replied.

After Bradley paid the check, the two of you walked out hand in hand to the Bronco. The ride to the beach parking closest to the Hard Deck was relaxed, Bradley never letting go of your hand. He had the radio set to a classic rock station but the volume down so you could still talk.  

The parking lot was essentially deserted when he pulled in, only a few cars remaining. It was close enough to the Hard Deck, it sometimes doubled as overflow parking when needed. It didn’t appear to be the case tonight.

The two of you made your way to the beach, kicking off shoes once you reached the sand. You walked hand in hand down the beach, enjoying each other’s company and the sound of the waves crashing against the shore. After a while Bradley paused, tugging on your hand gently to get you to stop.

“Want to sit here for a while? The sun will be completely setting soon.” He suggested.

“Sure.” You replied, smiling softly. You followed him over to some rocks that had been smoothed out over time, making them perfect for sitting on.

Bradley sat down first, then pulled you down to sit in front of him, allowing you to rest against him. His arms coming around you to hold you.

“Is this ok?” He asked softly, his breath warm against your ear.

“It’s perfect.” You replied, relaxing into him. You rested your hands on his legs, sinking back into his warmth.

“This is way better than the Hard Deck.” He said, chuckling. “I love Penny and it’s a fun place to hang out, but this way I don’t have to share you.”

“I’ve not been there yet to make the judgment, but I think it would be really hard to top this.” You replied, “Penny offered me a part time job there though until I get my life figured out. I just need to find a temporary part time sitter until Amelia is off for the summer.”

“You’ll like working with Penny. She’s great.” He replied, “It’ll be good for you to be out of the house too, and good for Gracie to be around new people.”

“I’m just scared to trust anyone with her.” You admitted. “Scared Trent will show up and take her while I’m not there to protect her.”

“We won’t let that happen, Sweetheart.” He replied, “We will find someone to watch her where she’s completely and 100% safe.”

“Do you know how absolutely amazing you are?” You asked, moving your head so you could look back at him. “I can’t even express how full my heart gets when I see you with Gracie and how sweet you are with her. I don’t know how we got so lucky to get to have you in our lives.”

“Sweetheart, I’m the lucky one.” He replied, his voice thick with all the emotions he was feeling, “You and Gracie are all I never knew I was missing from my life. I don’t even want to think about my life without you two now. I was just sort of existing on auto-pilot until walking into Jake’s that day on an SOS Princess mission.”

“I can’t give you a definitive time for everything with Trent to be wrapped up, but I promise, Gracie and I aren’t going anywhere.” You said.

“I don’t need a timeline, Sweetheart.” He replied, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “I’m not going anywhere either.”

You continued to sit together, watching as the sun set over the water. The sky changed colors until darkness settled in. Once the sun set the temperature started to drop, making you shiver despite Bradley’s warm body against your back.

“You’re getting cold, Sweetheart.” Bradley said, noticing the shivering, “Let’s head back to the Bronco. We can decide where to go from there.”

“Ok,” You replied, “I wasn’t anticipating such a big difference in the temp once the sun set.”

“It’s not as noticeable, unless you’re on the water.” He replied, “By the beach, you end up feeling the difference more.”

You walked back the way you’d come, hand in hand. This time you stopped to put your shoes back on before hitting the pavement of the parking lot.

Once back at the Bronco, Bradley walked with you to the passenger side. Instead of opening the door, he turned so that he was standing facing you, one of his hands coming up to cup your face. You leaned into his hand, enjoying the feel of it against his warm palm. You moved your hands up and around to his back, while he moved his other hand up to cup your face, looking into your eyes. You took a slight step closer, your hands moving up on his back in the process.

“Sweetheart, I don’t want to misread this situation…” He said, “But I really want to kiss you right now.”

“You’re not misreading anything.” You whispered.

Bradley leaned in slowly, giving you time to change your mind. His hands moved into your hair, tipping your head back and leaning further down until his soft lips connected with your own. A few seconds later, he pulled back to see your reaction. Seeing you smile, he leaned back in, chasing your lips again. You tightened your grip on his back, trying to get closer. He holds you tighter, his tongue snaking out to lick the seam of your lips. You open, granting him access, your own tongue meeting his as you both tentatively give in to the attraction that had been building. You remain locked in the heated exchange for what felt like hours but was only moments, before the need for oxygen forced you to separate enough to pull in shaky breaths.

“Holy shit.” Bradley whispered, not able to trust his voice. “That was incredible.”

“You are an exceptionally good kisser, Bradley.” You replied, your voice shaky from the kiss.

“That was all you, Sweetheart.” He said, “I don’t think I’ve ever been this affected by a kiss before.”

“I thought the ‘feeling fireworks’ or ‘sparks flying’ were just figures of speech.” You smiled, “I can confirm it is an actual occurrence.”

“Right there with you,” He smirked, “I need a minute to recover here.”

By the time Bradley was pulling the Bronco onto Jake’s street it was close to 11. The two of you had stopped at the Hard Deck for a drink before calling it a night. Coyote, Payback, Fanboy and Bob had been there. They tried to coerce Bradley into a game of pool, but he’d firmly declined, wanting to devote all of his attention to you.

“I had a really good time tonight, Bradley.” You said, smiling over at him. Your hands were once again entwined. “Thank you.”

“It was my pleasure, Sweetheart.” He replied, smiling over at you. “I hope I get to take you out again soon… and I’d love to spend time with you and Gracie together too.”

“We’d both love that” You assured him. “And look, we’re home before midnight.”

“That we are.” He agreed, then frowned at an unfamiliar car parked on the street with Texas plates. “Hey, Sweetheart, do me a favor and call Jake quick. Tell him and Nat to come outside. You’re going to go with Nat into the house and call the police. Stay inside with Gracie.”

“Bradley, what’s going on?” You asked, looking around to see what you’d missed, your eyes landing on the very familiar car. You felt bile start to rise in your throat, your heart started to race.

“Baby, I need you to stay calm ok?” Bradley said, “There is nothing he can do to you. Neither Jake nor I will let him anywhere near you, I promise you that. Can you please call Jake? I’m going to park and get out so I’m able to get you ok?”

You nodded then pulled your phone out and called Jake.

“Tulip, why are you calling me from the driveway?” Jake asked, confusion in his voice.

“Jakey” You whispered, fear choking your voice. “It’s Trent… he’s here.”

A/N: PHEW! That was was along one...what do we think??? Always love hearing your reactions! <3 

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[destiny-in-the-universe]

Commentary & Thoughts on Recent Fixations!

so, i recently finished another series; in other words, american dragon: jake long, and i am- screeching, literally. screeching.

first of all, i’m basically watching the shows i never got to see when i was a kid, or easily could’ve forgotten about because it was years ago, and holy stars- none of the shows disappointed, but unfortunately it has led to a recent amount of ridiculous brainrot and horrible fixating that could easily be a problem lol (it already is, i can’t seem to get enough of this content)

this is the reason why the secret quartet project has become such a big thing for me, but this isn’t technically about the crossover- this is literally me using tumblr as a way to get out my thoughts and theories and headcanons for the shows because goodness gracious, why did i have to fixate on cancelled- discontinued :)- shows but okay, this one is mostly about american dragon.

on one hand, you’ve got our title lead - jake long - who, oh my stars this kid- let me reiterate by saying he is in middle school (even though he’s fourteen, so did he get held back or are schools different in nyc?) and so a lot of his dumb, stupid, and daring decisions are literally because he is a teenager. jake however, is so adhd coded it’s insane, but anyway- like. he grows so much during the series- knowing when to open up to his own mistakes, that he’s clearly protective of his own family, and so forth but i also feel like bringing up: living a double life is hard and having to protect an entire magical community is going to wear you down, and we do get to see that- jake’s a kid with a huge weight and responsibility on his shoulders and hoo boy, he gets to go through it- esp. in season two- that was an entire rollercoaster

which also brings me to my next point: the huntsclan arc could’ve gotten an entire season dedicated to it, and not to mention- there’s- the whole thing with jake and rose and i’m just. we’ll get to that later but oh my god, the whole attempting to destroy the entire magical community should’ve gotten an entire season because much like other series i got into- american dragon is very episodic, and not entirely as connected but i wish we could’ve gotten more about the huntsmaster- what his deal is exactly, and why he’s got it particularly out for the american dragon specifically, but alas it ended too short-

but it easily brings me to my next point and one that will not leave me alone no matter what i do-

first of all: the dark dragon could’ve been handled so much better. like, don’t get me wrong- it was an interesting storyline, the arc was brilliant but because of the way the final episode ended- among other things- but seriously, i wanted more in the battle between the longs and the dark dragon, i wanted to see the dark dragon’s backstory and who he was but of course, i really don’t think he would’ve come back, after the season two finale

though this- oomf, that entire episode was wonderful and i loved it but also had me screaming the entire time- it ended a little anticlimactically and a bit disappointing i’ll admit because i had certain expectations, and you could definitely see where they were trying to pave into the next season but then that never happened. the dark dragon should’ve also had its own season with expanded lore and arcs- it also ended so anticlimactically, and i was hoping to see more for the identity reveal (i had no doubts that jonathan would be accepting but holy cow- i wanted more-)

also, fair warning- this might get long because there’s so much commentary and thoughts but there will be more, both for this and the other active fixations,

Character Dynamic Commentary

Jake and Rose: these two make me want to go feral; like, oh my god- they are so star-crossed, and their dynamic was so good? but you also have the fact that rose had amnesia; she literally had her memories wiped away, and replaced no less, only to move to another country. jake seriously went through it here, though this only brings me to my next point- rose realizing that jake was the american dragon honestly tore a piece of my heart out- but then we get the freaking episode where the huntsclan got their hands on the aztec crystals bc rose was being threatened and i swear i screamed; but rose and jake are such a power couple, like they would be unstoppable if they were able to fully work together, we’ve seen it. their relationship deserved to shine

Jake and the Long Family: i don’t really know how to describe all of them, but honestly- jake is clearly very protective of them; and while yes, he has the sibling rivalry with haley- and he genuinely does want the experience of a normal teenager, there’s still a lot he’s shown to be protective of his own family. there’s episodes where, despite his complaining about his own dad, jake realizes just how much jonathan long loves him and it’s so- holy stars, it makes me want to wag my tail, the one with the straogi where jake is weakened by them, and he still jumps at the chance to protect his dad even when he can barely do anything? or when he finally releases being a cougar scout could be fun? like also, the series finale- in season two, when jake almost gave up everything to save gramps from the dark dragon- he’s fourteen and does this, like i could honestly tie it back to jake having a dragon’s possessiveness but we’ll leave that for a separate post

Jake, Spud, and Trixie: i’m going to screech about these three. i love their dynamic- and jake and spud are very neurodivergent, you cannot take this headcanon from my cold, dead hands lol. like jake is adhd and spud, this kid is autistic. you will not be able to change my mind but seriously, their friendship is so strong and sure for episode reasons, sometimes they don’t exactly get along and it was almost killing me with the knowledge that spud and trixie didn’t know about jake being a dragon- the first reveal episode had me grinning, they are the best of friends. also spud knowing coding and hacking despite seemingly being very dumb? like he’s clearly intelligent- and admitted he would fail on purpose so what more is there to him?

Jake and the Dark Dragon: i love how i’m referencing a dynamic that barely got its screentime- but also, there was so much more potential for these two. like, i would’ve loved something where the dark dragon wanted to recruit jake to join his army- mentor him, it would have been such a great way to turn jake against his grandpa, against his own family but they didn’t do it. also, genuinely would’ve just loved learning more about what the dark dragon’s deal was- we got more for the huntsclan than we did for him, and maybe if the series hadn’t been cancelled, it might’ve been seen but alas

Now moving on to the closing features because i am immensely fixated- if there was a theoretical season three, i genuinely want the new threat that jake has to face to be the government (?) - think something like the guys in white from danny phantom but where they’re trying to capture magical creatures and do worse than what professor rotwood has tried (maybe even he goes on to help jake when he realizes that this group isn’t just looking to expose them) and planning to experiment on them or something. jake could be captured, or something like that and then things get more intense but we’ll get to this later because hoo boy, oh i have so many thoughts about the would’ve-been of season threes (looking at you too, rc9gn)

anyway, this show did not disappoint- sometimes it was kind of awkward to get through but even then, even with all of that, you could see the dedication placed (but the season two design for jake as a dragon was certainly… something)

anyway, that‘s all i have for today!

~ Mod Danny

[shadowsong26fic]

Coming Attractions!

Yes, I know it’s Wednesday, not Monday, but shhhhhh.

(In my defense, there’s been A Lot of IRL stuff the past couple days so. Anyway.)

As always, this is just a general overview of what I did last month and what I Hope to do next month; also an Open Question Night. Any asks about fandoms I’ve posted about here or on Ao3, or writing stuff in general is fair game. I do also accept prompts, but I make no promises on how quickly I fill them (there’s one currently sitting in my inbox that I’m hoping to get to later tonight, lol).

Anyway, here goes!

Star Wars:

I ended up dropping out of SWBB as a writer this year--just couldn’t get things to come together right--but I’m participating as an artist/podficcer! The story I’m recording is SWTOR-based, which is an area of fandom/canon that I have very little knowledge of, so it’s been a lot of fun working with my writer and getting to know a little more about that part (though it is apparently Very AU so.) I’m posting the podfic chapters as the writing chapters are posted, and you can find it here:

Writing: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47347087/ Podfic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47517721/

I have also been keeping up with my OTP meme fills for Obianidala. The one I put out this month was fun; it was a chance to go back to the Heralds of Valdemar crossover/fusion which I haven’t played with in ages. I haven’t even looked at this months prompts yet, lol, I should probably do that...

(Precipice!verse is still also extant in my head but I have done no active work on it lately unfortunately and am not sure when I’ll get back to it but, as I’ve mentioned, it’s too big a part of my life in this fandom for me to abandon. Until and unless I entirely leave the SW fandom, Precipice will be there.)

BSG:

Again with the OTP meme stuff; this month’s fill came together sort of last minute. I wasn’t totally sure what I wanted to do? I thought about something related to them eventually having kids on Earth (one of the available prompts was ‘pet/child acquisition’; also thought about something super self-indulgent involving Atia, but I think what I ended up writing turned out really well, so I’m happy.

Of course the Big news is that Galactica Big Bang officially opens in less than a month! I need to finish actually, like, Making the sign-up forms, haha. But I’m really excited for the event. I’m not sure if I’m going to be a participant as well as running it (podficcing is less intimidating than I thought it would be, based on my current SWBB experience, and I think especially if it’s something I already come to with some investment it’ll be nice? Also I do have BB-scale storyline ideas, lol. Not just the Massive Epics like TOB or continuing in the Backup Plans AU...right now the sort of top choices, if I do write, are going back to the Selkie AU or doing a Zarek character study? But we’ll see.

Other Fandom Stuff:

As you may have noticed, based on some things I’ve posted in the last couple weeks, I’ve gone down a very specific Les Mis rabbit hole XD I have two longfic projects being worked on; one I’m actually hoping to start posting later this week (I want to get at least three chapters prewritten, plus I think I want a second pair of eyes on chapter 2 just to make sure it’s not too Infodumpy, so. If anyone’s interested, lol. (on the other hand would it really be a victor hugo pastiche without at least one random infodump? lol)

The other one I haven’t started actually writing yet, but I have something of an outline for it (it’s a Groundhog Day AU which includes a few different endings out of Spite and/or Loving Mockery of other adaptations; along with a few others I just want to do). This one will have some very heavy TWs that should absolutely be taken seriously (Javert is the one looping the last like 36 hours of his life, you do the math). Anyway, once I get started on writing that, I’m hoping it’ll go pretty quickly.

I am signing up for pod_together again! As always, signing up to get assigned a podficcer; I think signups close the end of this week so I think I should be matched by Monday? This will be my third time doing the event. I’ve actually done crossovers both of the prior times? But I’m pretty proud of both pieces I put out, and it was a lot of fun to work on. We’ll see how it goes!

I think I mentioned last month that some of my AtLA plots may have resurfaced? So far not enough for me to actively work on them, but we’ll see. I did list that (as well as my other usual suspects of SW and BSG; plus Les Mis because the current brainrot is Strong and a couple others) as a primary/first-choice fandom for matching for pod_together, so that might produce something. Again, we’ll see.

Original Stuff:

Mostly OTP meme again, though a couple other things for Rainbowfic challenges have come out as well. Not really much to report here, although I am producing a lot more than I have in recent years, which is good, I’m pleased with myself on that.

...I think that’s everything? So, yeah! Open Question Night, as I mentioned above, let me know what’s on your mind! Or what you guys are working on/excited for!

[avnkin]

Shake On It [ 2 ]

Author’s note: I was really in my harry feels whilst writing this so sorry about that lmao also I proofread this so many times and it still SUCKS ASS. I posted this entire thing earlier from my phone but tumblr deleted everything except the title so yeah I’m sorry if there aren’t italics and bolds on some of the words where they should be but i’m just to lazy to go through the entire thing and find them all again, maybe i’ll do it later but who knows. I do not own harry potter or the storyline/characters they are the intellectual property of J.K Rowling. (not my gif)

Word Count: 5.9k

Summary: There’s little to nothing Draco values more than his reputation so when he sees it slipping, he’ll do anything in his power to catch it.

Pairings: Draco Malfoy x Fem!Reader / Platonic!Harry Potter x Fem!Reader

Warnings: angst, foul language, asshole!draco and daddy issues lol

This is an AU so all the information doesn’t exactly line up with the HP storyline for example Voldemort hasn’t returned but still exists so little from Harry’s history changes but Dumbledore’s still alive.

After yours and Draco’s interaction the other night you’d strongly begun reconsidering his offer to accompany him to the ball, maybe he wasn’t as bad as you thought, I mean what’s the worst that could happen? So many things your anxiety was quick to answer, the most important one being that Harry and Ron would probably never speak to you again.

“Y/N are you even listening to me?” Hermione’s voice snapped you out of your trance, her blurry hand waving in front of your face, you quickly began blinking in an attempt to bring your surroundings back into focus, “sorry” you then muttered sending her an apologetic smile before gesturing for her to continue with whatever she’d been talking about.

“As I was saying, I need a cute date for the ball, who do you think will annoy Ron the most?” you were about to answer when a voice from behind you beat you to it.

“Annoy who the most?”

You rolled your eyes having a pretty clear idea of who it was, you reluctantly turned around your eyes immediately locking onto Draco’s who stood there in all his glory a smug smile plastered onto his lips as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Excuse me who invited you to this conversation?” you retorted before turning back to Hermione who had an amused grin on her face causing you to lightly kick her from underneath the table, you didn’t want Draco putting two and two together and realizing you’d talked about him with Hermione.

“I was just wondering if you’d changed your mind about going with me to the ball” Draco cajoled causing your eyes to widen realizing you still hadn’t told Hermione about the fact he’d asked you in the first place.

You sent Hermione an an ‘i’ll tell you later’ look before twisting your body to face Draco’s who now had his hands placed in his robe pockets, his self assurance radiating off of him despite the fact you’d rejected him only days before, the boy had clearly never been told ‘no’ his entire life.

“No and I won’t be, so run along” you stated before making a shooing gesture with your hand which only seemed to have the opposite effect you’d intended it too, since he began to take a few steps forward, licking his lips as he looked you up and down.

“Yes you will” he stated matter of factly and it took all self control you had not to smack him right across the face, who did he think he was?

“Is it really that hard to get it into that tiny little brain of yours that there are girls alive who don’t like you” you practically growled missing how Hermione’s attention had drifted away from the scene unfolding before her and to the two figures who had begun making their way towards you.

“Yes because there aren’t an-”

“Malfoy find someone else to bother can’t you see she’s not interested” Harry cut him off as him and Ron now fully came into view, the two of them standing tall behind Draco whose attention had now shifted from you to them.

“Oh look who it is, dumb and dumber” chortles could be heard from the Slytherin table at Draco’s words causing you to roll your eyes, it was pathetic how they would lick up every single thing he did.

“Offers still there Y/L/N” Draco turned to you before he slowly started to ascend back towards the Slytherin table where he was greeted with numerous pats on the back as he squeezed himself in between Crabbe and Goyle.

“What a slimy git” Ron huffed as he took the seat next to yours, immediately beginning to scoop all the food in view onto his plate.

“What did he want anyways?” Harry asked resting his elbows on the wooden house table as he sat down opposite you.

“He asked if I wanted to go to the ball with him” you feigned disgust as you shook your head, hoping he would drop the subject, you’d never been a good liar and if anyone could see through you it would surely be your best friend.

“Just tell him you’re going with me if he asks again, then he’ll leave you alone” Harry suggested, Ron nodding along with him as he stuffed a chicken wing into his mouth.

“Yeah- yeah ‘course thank you Harry” you scratched the back of your head cringing at the obvious hint of disappointment lingering in your words which thankfully no one but Hermione seemed to notice since she reached her hand out across the table and laid it gently atop of yours, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

You gave her a small smile before your eyes began dancing around the Great Hall somehow coming to a halt on Draco’s figure, he had his chin resting in the palm of his hand as he engaged in conversation with Blaise.

No one could say that Draco Malfoy wasn’t handsome, rude and a prat? Sure, but unattractive no. He was the only boy you’d ever seen who was able to pull of such a hair color and as your eyes travelled along his sharp jawline up to his chiseled cheekbones you felt the uncontrollable feeling of heat rush up to your face as his eyes met yours.

He sent you a wink before turning back around, you mirroring his actions the feeling of butterflies swarming your stomach slowly melting away as you pushed any remaining thoughts of him aside.

-

The ball was only a few days from now and you and Hermione had decided to take a trip down to Hogsmeade in an attempt to shop for dresses, not wanting to repeat what had happened last year when you both had made the mistake of trusting your parents with your attires, the dresses they’d choosen had arrived the same night as the ball and you had been forced to show up in matching bright pink gowns since it had been too late to go and buy new ones. You’d been the laughing stocks off the school for a couple months after that, never again.

You cringed at the memory that would surely be edged into your mind forever but as you pushed open the wooden door that led into Gladrags Wizardwear you found yourself entranced with all the beautiful dresses littered around the shop.

“Have you decided who you’re gonna go to the ball with?” Hermione hummed as her fingers trailed over a blue gown that hung along with hundreds of others at the front of the store.

“Yeah I think I’m just gonna go with Harry, I don’t want to risk my friendship with either him or Ron by going with Draco” you sighed not feeling the need to hide your disappointment in front of her.

“I get that but if you really do like Malfoy you should just ease Harry and Ron into the idea of you two being together” Hermione shrugged in response before removing the dress she’d been looking at from its hanger and placing it into her arms as you continued browsing.

“How am I supposed to do that you know how much they hate him” you sighed as you lightly dragged your hand over the multiple fabrics that hung on the clothing rag next to you.

“You could dance with him at the ball” Hermione suggested, you nodded silently in agreement before coming to an abrupt halt as a certain dress caught your eye. It was champagne colored and made out of silk with a thigh high split running down the side of it, not the type of dress you’d usually go for but nevertheless you carefully placed it into your arms deciding their was no harm in seeing how it looked on you.

“Who are you going with?” you changed the subject not feeling like talking about Draco anymore, it was really killing your mood.

“Hero Finnigan asked me” your eyes widened at Hermione’s words. Hero Finnigan was in the year above you and was quite the heartthrob around school, he’d been known for having a new girl underneath his arm every week and it seemed that this time around it was going to be Hermione, much to your surprise.

“Please tell me you said yes, if anyone’s going to make Ron jealous it’s definitely him” you assured her, looping your arm with hers as you continued skimming through the store.

“Of course I said yes, I’m not that daft” she shook her head before continuing, “I don’t know though I-I guess I was just hoping that in the end Ron would ask me, but apparently he’s going with Lavender” her nose scrunched up at the mere mention of her name as she let out a heavy sigh.

Your heart ached for your best friend as you put an arm around her shoulder giving her a tight side hug, a subtle way of letting her know you were there for her no matter what.

“Enough about that let’s go try on our dresses and we can tell each other what we think” Hermione was obviously trying to distract herself but you didn’t feel like pressing the subject any further so you only nodded in agreement as you started searching for the changing rooms, it was a surprisingly big shop compared to how small it had appeared from the outside.

Once you’d finally found them at the far end of the shop you both entered separate rooms, simultaneously pulling the curtains shut shielding you from the watchful eyes of the other customers, although there weren’t that many.

You took one last look at the dress letting your fingers wander down the silky fabric before carefully removing it from its hanger and slipping your legs in between the opening.

Once you got it on, you weren’t able to reach the zipper on the back, no matter how hard you tried so you stealthily peeked your head out behind the curtain and seeing no one you began to make your way towards Hermione’s changing room hoping she could be of some assistance.

“Need some help with that?” a voice stopped you dead in your tracks, swiftly turning to see Draco standing there, a mischievous smirk resting on his lips as he took a step closer to you.

“Are you stalking me or something?” you shook your head, furrowing your brows once you noticed how his eyes weren’t meeting yours, instead they were trailing up and down your body, devouring every inch of you.

“Eyes up here Malfoy” you teased which made him finally look up at you, but instead of replying with a snide comment of his own he threw the suit he’d been holding onto a clothing rag nearby and slowly began to stride towards you.

You weren’t able to get a word out as he tenderly placed his ring clad fingers on top of your bare shoulders scanning your face for approval witch you granted by carefully nodding your head taking in a deep breath as you felt him begin to slowly turn you around.

You shivered once the cold metal wrapped around his fingers began to run down your arms, his fingertips then gently dancing down the small of your back in a painfully teasing manner.

You couldn’t help but let out a breathy sigh as he took a step closer to you his lips ghosting over your ear as he began to pull the zipper upwards causing you to almost involuntarily lean into him. As soon as you did his scent consumed you, he smelled of expensive cologne and spearmint, even better than you could have ever imagined.

He stopped as the zip reached the bottom strands of your hair, he thought for a moment before he carefully wrapped his hand around your h/c locks, twisting them gently around his fingers before letting them fall over the side of your shoulder, the tips of his fingers ever so slightly running across the side of your neck as he moved them back down to where he’d stopped.

You gently tilted your head, closing your eyes in content once you felt his hot breath fan over your neck, you leaned your head back at the sensation resting it atop of Draco’s shoulder, shivering once you felt his lips ghost over the sweet spot just behind your ear, one of his arms finding your waist as the other continued to work its way up your back.

Once you heard the faint sound of the zipper click as it reached its closing you slowly opened your eyes feeling him take an impossible step closer to you, your behind now pressed into his front as he trailed his hands down to your hips.

“You clean up quite nice Y/L/N” he breathed out as he began running his hands up to your stomach before finally reaching your waist where they abruptly stopped so that he could turn you back around, you let out a gasp at the sudden forced movement your hands clinging onto his shoulders to prevent you from falling.

You opened your mouth but no words came out as you were consumed by the feeling of his fingers digging into your sides, his lips mere centimeters from yours you almost unknowingly began to lean in.

He mirrored your movements but just before your lips could meet someone cleared their throat from behind you causing you to jump away from him, frowning at the sudden loss of contact.

Once your eyes met Hermione’s you quickly cleared your throat acting as if nothing had (almost) happened, she raised an eyebrow obviously confused at the scene unfolding before her.

You turned back towards Draco who was looking at you almost expectantly, “I’m going with Harry to the ball” you suddenly felt the need to tell him, hoping he wouldn’t get the wrong idea from the little moment you had just shared.

“Potter seriously?” Draco scoffed in return before making his way around you and Hermione, your eyes following his figure and as soon as he was completely out of sight you finally felt like you could breath again, staggering backwards into Hermione who quickly put her arms up to catch you.

“Oh I’m in trouble”

-

You’d decided to buy the dress you’d tried on in the store, even though every time you put it on you couldn’t shake away the feeling of Draco being pressed against you as his lips hovered dangerously close to your neck.... You shook your head in hopes that it would toss the memory out of your mind, you couldn’t be thinking about Draco right now, not when Harry was standing just outside the Gryffindor common room patiently waiting for you to get ready.

“Can you zip me up?” you turned your back to Hermione who quickly rushed to your side swiftly beginning to pull the zipper on the back of your dress upwards. As you closed your eyes you got momentary flashes off Draco’s ring clad fingers wrapped around your body and you tried with all your might to shake the tingling feeling you got away, but nothing seemed to be working.

“Okay do a little spin for me” you let out a laugh at Hermione’s words but nevertheless you began spinning around your dorm playfully, letting your hair fall across your shoulders as Hermione threw her head back in laughter.

“You look incredible” she complemented as you engulfed each other in tight hugs mentally preparing yourselves for the night ahead.

“Oh please, I’m nothing compared to you” you stated linking your arms together before the two of you began to make your way to your awaiting dates.

Once the door to the Gryffindor common room opened the first thing you saw was Harry engaged in conversation with Hero, you could tell by his uncomfortable shuffling that the exchange had been awkward causing you to let out a small giggle which captured the attention of the two boys.

Harry’s mouth hung open as he let his eyes wander all over you, from the thigh-high front split on the front of your dress to your flawless makeup and perfectly styled hair, he was speechless, if you two weren’t best friends he’d probably be tripping over his own two feet by now.

“Well this is certainly an upgrade from last year” Harry let out a teasing laugh as he bowed down to take your hand in his.

“Oh shut up” you feigned annoyance as you stood beside him, feeling goosebumps run up your arms as his hand came to rest on your lower back, leading the two of you towards the Great Hall.

“In all seriousness Y/N, you look amazing” Harry gushed as he pulled you into his side. An uncontrollable blush creeping onto your cheeks at his words as you let your head fall on his shoulder.

“You don’t look too bad yourself, Potter” you teased, the two of you letting out simultaneous fits of laughter as you followed closely behind Hero and Hermione.

After a moment of silence Harry suddenly spoke out, “Ron was going to ask her you know” the two of you shared knowing glances at his words, it was so painfully obvious that your other two best friends were head over heels in love with each other but neither of them dared to make the first move, either to scared of being rejected or ruining their many years worth of friendship.

“Figures” you shrugged a comfortable silence overtaking you as you walked over to one of the many rows of couples stood in front of the entrance leading into the Great Hall.

As the doors begun to open you excitedly smiled up at Harry but before you were able to move forward another couple had harshly pushed their way in front of you and you were immediately able to identify the mob of platinum blond hair.

“Excuse me” you rolled your eyes causing the two of them to turn their heads towards you, you couldn’t hold in your scoff once you saw who he’d decided to bring, Pansy Parkinson of all the people in this bloody school.

“Don’t start anything Malfoy” Harry warned before either of them were able to get a word out, it looked like Pansy was going to throw a snide comment your way but stopped as soon as her eyes met Draco’s, she let out a huff before reluctantly turning back around.

“You look dashing” Draco complimented, you could feel Harry tense up beside you and you snaked an arm around his waist in an attempt to calm him down, the last thing you wanted was to cause a scene.

“Shouldn’t you be telling that to your date?” you retorted gesturing towards Pansy who seemed to be strangely quiet, usually she couldn’t keep her mouth shut no matter the circumstance, but you weren’t complaining.

Draco didn’t respond instead he just shrugged his shoulders before turning back around his arm slipping down towards Pansy’s lower back, you felt the inkling feeling of jealousy begin to form inside you but you forced yourself to push it away giving Harry’s bicep a reassuring squeeze knowing it had taken all his might not to hex Draco then and there.

As soon as Draco and Pansy had left you two be you quickly pulled Harry along with you into the hall so you wouldn’t get trampled by the entourage of students crowded behind you who were also squeezing their way through the double doors.

You intertwined your fingers with Harry’s as you took in your surroundings. It looked even better than last year, snow was falling from the starry black ceiling stopping just a few feet above you, mistletoe’s and every traditional Christmas decoration you could think of were littered all across the hall and instead of the usual house tables there were hundreds of smaller silver ones, each having it’s own floating candle above them.

Once you spotted a decent place to sit you tugged onto Harry’s arm gesturing for him to follow you towards the table your eyes were set on, somehow along the way you managed to spot Hermione and you threw your arm up gesturing for her hand Hero to come sit with you and Harry.

It wasn’t long until the chair beside you was being pulled from underneath the table and Hermione placed her self atop of it along with Hero, you happily greeted both of them but all joy inside you seemed to fade away once you noticed Ron and Lavender heading your way.

Oh please no

Ron placed a chaste kiss on Lavender’s cheek as he pointed towards your table.

Don’t sit here

Lavender eagerly began to nod following behind Ron as they inched closer and closer.

Anywhere but here

Despite your silent praying Ron was now pulling a chair out for Lavender before taking a seat himself and as soon as he did an awkward tension filled the air. You grabbed Hermione’s hand from underneath the table giving it a reassuring squeeze noticing how she’d tensed up once Lavender had bitterly greeted her.

“Whose this then?” Ron could be heard from the other end of the table, you rolled your eyes at his tone, how did Hermione not realize he was jealous hell even Hero seemed to notice it as his eyes uncomfortably shifted between Hermione’s angered expression and Ron’s annoyed one.

“Hero Finnigan, and you?” he reached his hand out over the table and for a split moment your eyes had widened thinking Ron was actually going to sit there and ignore him but thankfully the ginger haired boy reluctantly reached over the table and connected his hand with Hero’s.

“Ron, Ron Weasely”

“Weasely, eh? could have guessed, I’m good friends with your brothers” Hero attempted to make conversation but Ron didn’t seem all to keen on it only muttering a “whatever” underneath his breath causing you to kick him from underneath the table, you gave him a warning glance to which he replied by throwing a small ‘piss off’ in your direction.

Before you could begin to scold him for his rude behaviour Dumbledore’s voice tore throughout the Great Hall preventing you from doing so although you had a feeling that if it hadn’t had been him it probably would have been Harry.

“Welcome students to our annual Jingle Ball, may I say you all look wonderful tonight” Dumbledore gingerly smiled, his wand lightly pressed against the side of his neck as he gestured towards the numerous students all dressed in their finest attires.

“We’ll start the evening with a three course meal prepared by our lovely house elves” claps begun to sound around the Great Hall which you quickly joined in on, smiling brightly once you noticed the numerous elves clumsily standing up from their seats and waving at the students.

“Once you’ve finished eating a band will be preforming for us and I hope that you and your dates will be joining me and McGonagall on the dance floor” laughter sounded around the hall at the last part of his sentence but instead of joining in like you usually would you found yourself draining out all noise as your eyes met Draco’s.

He’d already been looking your way and you couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on your lips as his icy grey eyes burned through yours, you felt like there was some type of force drawing you to him and you couldn’t do anything about it, even though your head was screaming at you that shouldn’t be developing feelings for someone as arrogant and cruel as Draco Malfoy your heart seemed to be having trouble following.

-

Once everyone had finished eating you were eager to get away from your table, somehow Hero and Ron had begun a full blown argument which you and Hermione had to quickly shut down by asking Lavender to take Ron somewhere else until he’d calm down, that boy could not control his temper if his life depended on it.

You’d managed to cheer Hermione up after the entire ordeal telling her that she should focus on herself for once and have fun, thankfully she’d listened and you couldn’t help the giddy expression overtaking your facial features as you watched her and Hero sway together on the dance floor.

“Care to dance M’ lady” Harry merrily bowed down in front of you reaching his hand out towards yours, you placed a hand on your chest in feigned surprise before gently laying your hand in Harry’s palm.

“Why, I would be delighted to” you attempted a posh accent unable to contain the giggle that fell past your lips as you let Harry lead you to the dance floor.

As soon as his arm had wrapped around your waist and the other intertwined with your hand another slow song began playing, most of the students were still digesting their food so their weren’t many on the dance floor, it was only you and Harry, Hero and Hermione and about six other couples.

You leaned your head on Harry’s chest letting him slowly sway you to the soothing melody of the song. “You know I love you right?” Harry mumbled as he placed a kiss on top of your head.

“I love you too, silly” you brightly smiled up at him, you both knew there weren’t harbored feelings for the other hidden behind those three words so you had no trouble voicing it to each other.

You tightly wrapped your arms around his waist continuing to slowly move around the dance floor. You knew how hard his life had been leading up to this point, losing his family, Sirius, and then Cedric he always had the inkling fear that one day he’d lose you or Ron or Hermione so you wanted to make sure he knew you weren’t going anywhere.

Sometimes silence speaks louder than words and you knew you were saying everything you needed just by being there with him, it felt like hours that you’d stayed that way wrapped in each others arms but soon students begun to make their way to the dance floor so you and Harry decided to take a short break, heading hand in hand back towards your table.

-

Unbeknownst to you whilst you and Harry had been in your own world gently dancing with each other for all eyes to see, Draco had been enduring pure torture over at his table.

“I can’t believe she choose Potter over you”

“That’s gotta sting”

“How’s it feel being the second choice”

“Hope you’re ready to do my homework for the rest of the year”

Was all he had heard for the last hour as he’d watched you and Harry dance with one another. No matter the threats he threw their way and menacing looks they just wouldn’t stop, he felt as if his power of being crowned the Slytherin prince was slipping away from him, since in his world losing to someone like Harry Potter was as low as you could get.

Then and there Draco decided he wasn’t going to endure it anymore he was making his move tonight no matter the circumstance.

-

“You know Ginny’s been eyeing you all night” you wiggled your eyebrows nudging Harry’s shoulder who awkwardly began shifting in his seat as he mumbled a ‘really’ in response to which you nodded.

“Go ask her too dance!” you stood up so you could force him out of his seat along with you, you subtly pointed towards Ginny’s direction who had swiftly looked away as soon as her eyes had met Harry’s.

“But what about you?” Harry frowned realizing you didn’t have anyone to spend time with if he’d leave since both Hermione and Ron seemed to be preoccupied with their dates.

“Don’t worry about me I’ll be fine! now go” you ushered him forward giving him a reassuring thumbs up as he began to walk towards her.

“You’re quite the matchmaker aren’t you?” Hermione had suddenly walked up behind you and you both watched in amusement as Harry almost fell over twice before he was able to reach Ginny who had happily agreed to dance with him.

“Where’s Hero?” you asked as you turned to face Hermione eyes wandering around the hall in an attempt to spot her date, “oh he’s just gone to get us some drinks, you’re welcome to join us if you’d like” Hermione offered but you shook your head.

“No its okay honestly I’m fine” you assured her, you did not want to spend the evening third wheeling your best friend and her date.

Hermione began opening her mouth surely to convince you to join them but stopped once her eyes landed on something behind you or rather someone behind you.

“Care to dance?”

You swiftly turned around to see Draco with his hand reaching out towards you, you tried your best to contain the smile that was so desperately gnawing at the sides of your mouth as you turned back to Hermione who was giving you knowing smile.

“Find me if you need anything alright?” you eagerly nodded at her words only turning back to Draco once Hermione had fully vanished into the crowd.

“One dance, that’s it” you attempted to sound serious but it came off in a more teasing manner as you let your hand fall into Draco’s.

“Agreed”

As soon as you’d reached the middle of the dance floor, Draco’s arm had snaked around your waist pulling you into him whilst the other intertwined your fingers. You let out a giggle as he began twirling you around, gracefully catching you back in his arms as both his hands moved to rest on your lower back.

“You’re quite the dancer” you complimented, without a doubt boosting Draco’s already large ego, “I know” he had replied with a knowing smirk, twirling you around one last time before pulling you flush up against him your noses bumping together since you’d already been looking up at him. You’d held the eye contact for a minute as you brightly smiled at each other before you gently let your chin rest on his shoulder as he slowly began swaying you from side to side.

As your eyes began dancing over the students you didn’t think anything could burst your happy bubble until your eyes found Harry’s who had a look of disappointment edged onto his features as he pulled away from Ginny who had frowned at his sudden dismissal as she watched him begin to make his way out of the Great Hall.

You cleared your throat as you uncomfortably began shuffling away from Draco who gave you a look of confusion as he watched you pull your hand out of his and back away from him.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry I can’t do this” you muttered before hurriedly turning around and squeezing your way through the crowd of students all huddled together on the dance floor, most of them giving you annoyed glances as you pushed them out of the way but you didn’t care all you wanted to do was find Harry. You couldn’t imagine how he’d felt once he saw you his best friend, dancing with someone who’d made his life a living hell ever since the first year.

Once you’d exited the Great Hall you frantically began looking around the empty corridors in an attempt to find Harry who’d stormed out here only moments ago.

“Y/N!” you heard Draco call from behind you but you ignored him, picking up your pace once you heard his nearing footsteps echoing around the empty hallways.

“Y/N please wait” you felt him grab ahold of your wrist swiftly turning you back to face him, his grip only tightening as you began attempting to pull your hand away.

“No! You can’t treat my friends like shit and then expect me to give in on whatever the hell you’re trying to do” you finally managed to rip your hand out of his grasp as you turned back around but he quickly ran in front of you placing his hands on your shoulders to keep you in place.

“Listen I’m sorry alright, bloody hell I just- I can’t stop thinking about you I don’t know how to explain it but I think I might-” he cut himself off hesitating to speak his next words unsure of how you’d react since he didn’t want to return to his friends with yet another failed attempt.

“You think you might what?” you crossed your arms over your chest glaring up at him as you watched his mouth open and close again.

“Fancy you” he finally let out, your eyes widening as you let your hands fall down to your hips. You took a few steps back until you couldn’t move any further the tall walls of the castle preventing you from doing so.

“You what?” you barely whispered and Draco took that as his chance to walk towards you placing both his hands on the wall next to you.

As you looked back up at him he slowly started to remove one hand from the wall so he could place it onto your cheek and just like he’d done in the store, he began leaning in until his lips were barely hovering above yours, you so desperately wanted to close the gap between you but a part of you was screaming to push him away and never look back, but as your eyes met his once more you couldn’t bring yourself to do it your heart taking control as he pressed his lips against your own.

Your lips continued dancing with each other at a normal pace until he’d moved to deepen the kiss swiftly wrapping his arms around your waist so you were able to loop yours around his neck, he pushed you even tighter up against the wall causing you to let out a gasp allowing him to slip his tongue into your mouth.

You ran your fingers through his hair gently pulling on the strands on the back of his head before letting your head fall to the side as he began leaving kisses down your neck his hands trailing down your sides until they wrapped around your hips pulling you even further into him.

You gently blinked your eyes open as you pulled away from him, your lips undoubtedly swollen and your lipstick smeared but you didn’t care.

“No one can know about this, not until I talk to Harry” you breathed out leaning your forehead against his as you attempted to slow your heart rate by taking deep breaths in and out.

“Of course I won’t tell anyone” he lied, he’d gotten quite good at that after having to continuously lie to his father ever since he was a child, one particular incident that he would never forget was when he’d accidentally let one of the house elves go because he didn’t know that to free them they had to be granted an item of clothing and on a particularly cold night he saw no harm in granting the elf his jacket since it had been shivering beside him and when his father had barged into his room later in the night furious at his son’s stupidity Draco had lied and told him that the elf had tricked him into doing so and upon hearing this his father had tracked the elf down and casted the unforgivable curse onto him, after that Draco lied to his father about almost everything he did to ensure something like that would never happen again.

Amongst his peers he was powerful and feared but when it came to his father he was nothing, never good enough and always in the way. School was the only place he felt he was more than his father’s words so he knew that as soon as he would make his way into the Slytherin common room the first thing he was going to do was tell his friends that he’d done it, that you were slowly but surely beginning to fall for him, which put him right back on top. 

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[sortasirius]

what makes you think the writers want deancas? not trying to be an asshole, i'm just genuinely curious as to why you think that. i know berens' episodes are pretty heavy with subtext so i can see why you'd say that he wants it, but i'm not so sure about the rest of the writers/dabb. it seems like meghan isn't a huge fan either, given her "they twisted it so fast" tweet :/ of course she's a very new writer (think she's only writing one ep this season?) but still

OKAY this is a great question, welcome to my dissertation.

I’m going to address the end of your question first. Meghan is actually DeanCas positive, she has been for quite a long time. She actually, a few years back, posted a picture of her reading a literal book about Destiel and captioned it “writing reading” or something like that.

This whole thing just comes out of a boiling over of tensions because of how nasty fandom twitter can be. Like I said here, I think this has just gotten blown out of proportion, they shouldn’t have posted all this randomly disparaging stuff, but also like...can you blame them? The fandom is a lot, we always have been, and they’re probably also under a gag order not to talk about the finale, and are annoyed that people keep asking.

So nah, Meg is not anti Destiel.

To the first part!! So let’s take a look at the show runners since Cas has been around.

Seasons 4 and 5: Kripke

Seasons 6 and 7: Gamble

Seasons 8-11ish: Carver

Seasons 11ish-15: Dabb

So starting with Kripke. Okay, yes, I will be the first to admit that we have some pretty incredible Destiel moments in these seasons, but it’s less directly written into the plot and much more from Misha and Jensen’s uhhhh ~chemistry~. The only times it was directly written into the script was when the episode was handled by someone like Edlund (“On The Head Of A Pin,” “The End,” “My Bloody Valentine”). And you have to remember, if in season 5, there are moments here and there where you’re like huh that’s suspiciously romantic dialogue, remember that Cas took Anna’s place. Anna was supposed to be endgame for Dean, but due to a myriad of issues and Misha’s general greatness, Anna was replaced with Cas.

Onto 6 and 7. Hmmm. Gamble. 6 and 7 are my two least favorite seasons and that’s no secret, and that’s not only due to the plain old weird shit in the overall storyline, but also that homegirl killed off Cas in s7 and then Bobby like four episodes later. (Also it ALWAYS rubbed me the wrong way they couldn’t have Baby in that season lol). We still had some great DeanCas moments, but again, it wasn’t really written into the overall arc (until they had to change the end of season 7 because of tanking ratings and bring Misha back lol, anyone remember the fact that Dean kept Cas’ jacket and would randomly dream of him? Yeah.). But we still had those moments, those distinctly romantic moments, probably the best example in these two seasons is from Edlund again, specifically “The Man Who Would be King,” I wrote a little about that here.

We move onto Carver, who gave us, at this point, the most overt DeanCas season with season 8 (season gr8 is a better name imo), and this is the first time Dean and Cas’ relationship is directly written as an arc of the season.  I mean, you have everything in Purgatory, Dean “seeing” Cas everywhere, the fact that he felt so guilty that Cas stayed in Purgatory that he manipulated his own memories to think that he was the one that failed Cas, because he couldn’t comprehend that Cas would want to leave him, and let’s not forget Dean snapping Cas out of Naomi’s hold on him in “Goodbye Stranger.”  It was a very obvious shift, not enough to alert the general audience, but more than enough for most of us in fandom.

It’s also important to note that this is when Andrew stopped co writing with Loflin and started writing his own episodes (”Hunter Heroici” anyone?)  I like Loflin fine, but Dabb was able to stretch his legs a little bit more once he stopped co-writing, and we also began to see some DeanCas themes in his solo episodes.

In any case, them and their issues being a big part of the seasons continued with Carver, and Berens entered the scene, his first episode (”Heaven Can’t Wait”) is one of my favorites, with human Cas and the fanfiction gap and Dean and Cas just generally being awkward and funny and sweet.  This is Bobo’s FIRST episode, remember that.  He comes right out of the gate with it.

Also in Season 9, this is when Dean takes the Mark of Cain, and the Cas/Colette mirror is born, so obviously, Dean and Cas are the fabric of the season once again.  This is also the season where Metatron says Cas is “in love with humanity,” and then immediately refers to Dean as Humanity so uhhhh yeah.

Onto season 10, Dabb and Berens continue with their greatness (I could write pages on the DeanCas date in “The Things We Left Behind” alone).  And then we have one of the best scenes in the entire show in “The Prisoner” where the Cas/Colette mirror continues and Dean, driven by grief and pain and rage and the Mark, still doesn’t kill Cas.  He still can’t kill Cas.

Season 11 is important because it takes choice away from both Cas and Dean, and shows us, as the audience, how much losing each other takes out of them. We saw in season 10 how much losing Dean takes from Cas, but what about Cas losing Dean?  Dean loses his choice with his connection to Amara this season, and loses even more when Lucifer reveals he’s been possessing Cas, and plays on Dean’s connection to Cas like a mockery.  It’s also worth noting that, similarly to season 8, Dean breaks out of the connection with Amara when he’s worried about Cas, and that’s something that even SHE is surprised by.

But then season 12, the beginning to the Renaissance.  This is when we get the writer’s that become important for what Dean and Cas are today, and, truly, why I believe they want canon Destiel as much as we do.

This is the first season with Dabb’s writers: Davy Perez, Meredith Glynn, Steve Yockey, and of course Bobo all come in with their incredible talents and gave us episode after episode of good content.  “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” is probably my favorite, probably the best example of what I’m saying.  An episode where Dean is called out by an enemy directly, told to “roll the dice” on Cas’ life.  And Dean won’t, it’s not even really a hesitation.  And this comes from a character that has known Dean for ten seconds.  I also wrote more in depth about this episode here.  There are also some.....distinctly domestic details we get this season, specifically in “The Future” (written by Berens and Glynn) with the mixtape.  The most tropey of tropes mixtape.  Yeah, I’ll just leave that one here.

And then season 12 ends with Cas’ death, but also with the parallel between Sam and Dean with Jess and Cas.  Sam literally has to drag Dean away from Cas, just like Dean had to drag Sam out of his burning apartment in the pilot.  The episode drives it home in every way that it can: Dean is the one left kneeling by Cas’ body, while Sam goes to find out what is upstairs.  Dean is the one who stares at the sky, finally broken.  This isn’t a random thing, this is Dean’s whole arc, it’s the entirety of the beginning of 13.  Dean’s pain, his anguish, his anger.

Season 13 starts with them burning Cas, with Dean, who has begged God to bring him back, who has split his knuckles punching a door, standing, staring at Cas’ pyre with brokenness on his face.

I mean.....

Anyway, season 13 is where it gets interesting (well, I think all of this is interesting but I’m a writer nerd so).  So Cas comes back from the Empty in “Advanced Thanatology” written by Steve Yockey, and then a wombo combo of “Tombstone” by Davy Perez next (”Brokebacknatural” as the PR said at the time).  Listen.  This is the part that SPN crossed a line that they couldn’t come back from.  With Cas being Dean’s “big win,” the fact that Dean and Cas watch movies together, “I told you, he’s an angry sleeper.  Like a bear.” Talked about it here.

This is where, in my opinion, the network stepped in, but the damage was already done.  They had already established that Cas was Dean’s big win, that Dean’s poor coping was not due to Mary’s disappearance, but solely due to Cas, and that Dean and Cas have more married energy than anyone else.  The network had nixed blatant canon at this point, and they writing room had been pushing the boundaries of what the network would allow. 

After these episodes, we see a marked drop off of DeanCas heavy scenes.  They’re still there, still a part of the fabric of the season, but not as...obvious as it had been in early season 13.

And this continued through season 14, we’re back to scraps of Destiel scenes here and there, but to me it always felt like there was something bubbling under the surface, something distinctly unsaid in the themes of the season, even after the walk back of obvious “Dean and Cas are in love” scenes.

And then we get to season 15, which, y’all know I talk about all the time.  What’s important here is that Bobo and Glynn are both executive producers, calling more of the shots than ever before.  Additionally, it’s important to note that, though they only co write occasionally, Glynn and Berens refer to each other as “work husband” and “work wife.”  Each episode has just turned up the volume, and, not for the first time, but certainly the most obvious, Dean and Cas ARE the season.  Sure, they’re trying to beat God, they’re trying to finally find peace, defeat the final big bad, but really?  This season has been about Dean, and Dean’s relationship to Cas.

And not only do we have obvious and clear Destiel in nearly every episode, but we have episodes like “Last Call” which canonize bi!Dean (wrote about that here).

And, maybe most importantly so far, we have “The Rupture,” the breakup, and “The Trap,” Dean’s confession (both written by Berens).  And here’s the thing.  These episodes feel connected, but also feel like they’re missing something.  Beren’s last episode is 15x18, “The Truth.”  We’ve all spec’ed about what could happen in this episode, and I think *I* know what it’s leading to.  But for it to be leading to that, it means that the network has to have approved what we’ve all been waiting for years for.

Who got this change to happen?  Who got the network to change their minds?  It wasn’t us.  It was them.  I am fully convinced that Dabb and Berens quite literally put their careers on the line for Dean and Cas.  They believe in them, they’ve shown that from the beginning, but the only thing standing in the way was the network, never allowing them to take the final step. 

So, to answer your question: I think the writers want canon DeanCas because they’ve already shown us that they do.  Take a look at their episodes, at Dabb’s, at Beren’s, at Glynn’s, at Perez’s, at Yockey’s.  They’ve been telling us what’s going on with Dean and Cas for years.

Sure, I’m not in their heads, I guess I don’t know for *sure* that this has been their thought process, but if we put it all together, from the marked shift when Dabb fully took over in s12, to the change right after “Tombstone,” to the new shift, the blatantly romantic shift in season 15, what else is there?

I’ve said for a long time that we, the SPN fandom, are beyond lucky to have the writer’s that we do.  They’re all going to go on to have prolific careers and we were lucky to get them at the end of our little show.  I give them a lot of credit for what we have in the show today.

Just remember, they’ve been telling us in all of s15 who Chuck is.  He says he’s the writer, right?  But a writer who doesn’t have control of his characters?  A writer who wants to do the same ending over and over because it “works”?  That doesn’t sound like a writer, it sounds like a network exec.

They’ve been showing us what they want for years, and the way s15 is going?  I think they may have convinced the network to let us have it.

[bleulone]

Can we talk about about how Colin looked in ep 1 when he first saw Marina compared to how he looked when he saw Pen in ep 8. Almost the exact same look! Of course his look to Penelope is probably more about his guilt because he brushed her off when she tried to warn him but still..progress! Lol and then when he's getting ready to leave for Greece, he glanced towards Penelope's home. I think they're having Colin's feelings for her grow gradually in the show instead of all of a sudden like in the books.

Hey! Thank you for this insightful ask of yours :) Sorry for the late answer, I took a long time to write this— without further ado, here we go!

Indeed, Polin is first and foremost a story of gazes, those gazes being of many natures. Whether they are love ones, friendly ones, admirative ones or lustful ones, looking imposes itself to be a huge parameter in Penelope and Colin’s love story.

In order to understand that on screen, film-making has at its disposal a very rich and smart langage of its own. Sometimes, comparision helps to underlines the differences between one character’s relationship with person A mirorring person B. I feel like Shondaland and Chris Van Dussen wanted to introduce the audience to the evolution of our Bridgerton men’s perception of Love. For instance, while Anthony views attachement— to Siena— as a way to escape his responsibilities before becoming his villain (...until our queen ma’am Kate Sheffield comes to the picture), Benedict doesn’t comprehend this universal concept and prefers to enjoy the many physical pleasures life can offer. In other words, the older brothers already explored their sexuality here and there, making them the infamous rakes that they are. As for Colin, it’s a complete other thing.

Colin is young. Very young. At 21, he’s just left Eton College and barely knows anything of the world nor women. Like Anthony said in 1x06, Colin hasn’t been taken to brothels which is a very important step in the building of young men’s sentimental and sexual education during that time period. Since he missed this essential step, our sweet/immature boy has no clue about how to deal sagaciously with his feelings and his “foolish” impulses, baring his naivety. At this point of the story, we can easily come to the conclusion that Colin is a virgin who can’t drive XD. He’s just a child overcame by his passions, a hopelessly romantic who rushes things without taking the time to properly court or know his significant other. And his off-screen flirtation with those supposed numerous girls in London isn’t of any help to justify his (oh so little) experience. So when he sees Marina, he’s so struck by her... mainly by her alluring appearance. And he doesn’t seem to let his eyes nor mind go beyond her exquisite beauty.

In this perspective, the whole Colin/Marina storyline can be perceived as a parallelism to the Pen/Colin’s one. In 1x01, he is immediatley smitten with a dancing Miss Thompson, which happens to be ironically the same case with a 17 year-old Pen but with him. We got to see her, a few moments ago, dreamily looking at him from the back of the dancefloor (echoeing the episode where she fell madly in love with him after he fell off his horse at Hyde Park). She’s charmed by his dashing look and his kindness, yet she doesn’t seem to know anything else about him considering the rare conversations they share. Her burning gaze fits the original story from Julia Quinn’s books because in Romancing Mister Bridgerton, the 28 year-old spinster Penelope do realize later on that Colin is more than a good looking man : he’s a human who possesses a temper and flaws.

Either way, both of our boos are portrayed as hopelessly young people in love who childishly idealize the objects of their affection.

In 1x08, it’s the other way around. It’s Colin who sees Pen first, her who appears to wear the yellow dress’ lookalike from the pilot—what an interesting call back ^^. With his mouth slightly agape and his eyes wide open, we can catch sight of the timid spark of a change in his gaze : Colin Bridgerton notices Penelope Featherington. He‘s touched by the realization that she cares about him. It would be rather inappropriate of me to say that Colin is already in love with her. However, in the finale, I do believe that he’s more struck by her high level of deep care for him than her beauty.

We are thus able to spot two big differences in Colin’s relationship with women in this season : when his attraction to Marina was purely physical and rushed, his attraction with Penelope is more emotional and slow. And for now, he comes to cherish his special bond with her, especially after she tried to warn him of the dangerous trap he was about to fall into. Even if he just sees her as his younger sister’s best friend right now, Pen matters in his life. And it’s still a little yet important progress for sure.

Speaking of which, I agree with you that this look of awe as well as realization is mostly mixed up with guilt. Since he didn’t take into account her words, he felt the strong need to apologize. But bear in mind that guilt formulates a considerable part in Colin’s feelings for Pen... and it’s only the very beginning. In the future, he’ll blame himself for not seeing her as the beautiful goddess and siren that she is in the first place. He’ll blame himself for not reciprocating the feelings for her.... Though at the moment, due to his lack of experience with women, Colin is oblivious to Pen’s obvious signs of sorrow when he told her he’s leaving for Greece/Cyprus. Next time, he’ll detect her sadness and won’t let her go, I’m sure of it (if he doesn’t I’ll riot).

Furthermore, I’m so glad you brought up the scene where Colin glances at the Featherington house. I had the same thought as well. When you put this still and the one where Pen is crying while looking at her window side by side, it even seems like they’re looking at each other. In a way, it implicitly confirms Pen’s key role in his final decision... After all, she’s the one who inadvertently inspired him right ?

The act of traveling has always been seen as cathartic since leaving home to discover yourself allows you to heal your broken heart and soul. It’s natural for Colin to do this. To make his first real steps into the world. His choice is quite relatable more than it is essential for his arc in the series. I can’t wait for him to come back all changed, hot ^^ and mature. I think, like you said, they are planning on making him progressively falling in love with her. Colin’s feelings will gradually leave the platonic zone to explore and officially stay in the intimate zone throughout the seasons.

Overall, the Colin/Marina and Colin/Penelope parallel in s1 mostly helps viewers to compare the way Colin evolves from being a stubborn naive boy to a heartbroken young man who’s aware of his crutial need for Experience. His coming of age, just like Pen’s, has just begun. And they will surely lead to our boy changing himself into the true charming rake that he’s meant to be and our girl into a more confident woman. Consequently, I think their story won’t take 10 years but rather at the very least 5 years perhaps to fit the TV timeline. Once Polin will finally be able to discuss, we’ll hopefully get to see more interesting nuances and shades added to the portrait they painted of one another over the years. They’re indispensable to the slow build up of their emotions/attraction as well as the shattering of their childish idealization/perception of each other.

All in all, I’m so loving the fact that season 1 beautifully sets up the importance of the gaze in Polin’s love story. This first installment is like an expository scene of a play. It leaves a trail of clues and pieces of information here and there at the reach every viewers who can pick them up and analyze what can be the main themes which will determine one character’s story arc/romance. With Polin we have : admiration, wit, love and friendship, desillusionment. (I know they are more but it’s all I can think of rn lol).

If we’re already emotional messes just with the mere power of them looking at each other, imagine when they’ll actually talk and share real conversations. It’s going to be a long way to canon but luv me some good fluffy angsty steamy slow burn :) ✨ I hope this long of mine answers your ask ahah, even if I talked about many things other than just Polin’s looks. Also, sorry if you spot some grammatical mistakes, English is not my first language.

[crossovereddie]

Actually, here is an alternative thing for you to occupy your time with, and a question I have been meaning to ask you for a while. I have finished 911 finally! So I'm ready for the new season. And I wonder, realistically, what do you think the roadmap would be for a buddie endgame?

I absolutely see how their story has been framed and filmed in a lot of parallels to how a romantic storyline would be set out. But there has been no outright mention of either of them being bi - although the conversation about Maddy setting Buck up with whassisface was very casual and could very easily have been an example of canonically bi Buck - and they are both at the end of season 4 in 'relationships' with women.

So, in your estimation, what's the timeline? What's the transition? How do they go about this and how long does it take? I wanna know your thoughts 👀

okay yes i have lots of thoughts on this and it's actually one of my fave questions i get asked. I've always watched a lot of tv shows so I'm just estimating on what I've seen before and what I would personally do. IMO this love story is a slow burn. We only have four seasons so far and only three of those seasons have Eddie in them. This unsurprisingly got long so ill put it under the cut.

So I'll go by seasons bc to me its important to look at everything that has happened so far by seasons and by love interests and not as a whole. Its the best way i can form a timeline that I think would make the most sense and why

S1: So we don't get any hints at Buck being anything other than straight and I think this is because he was supposed to be. They hadn't planned for Eddie yet and they definitely hadn't planned for the chemistry Oliver and Ryan were gonna have. S1 Buck was this reckless kid who didn't take anything serious. He was definitely super immature. Then he meets Abby and he starts to get serious about his job and his love life. I'm not gonna say "Abby changed him" because she didnt. He saw the person he was and the person he was becoming and decided on that change himself.

S2: Eddie!!!! So we get introduced to this army medic turned firefighter in the least heterosexual way. Then Buck is angry because Eddie is hot and really good at his job. they work together and Eddie compliments Buck and now they're smiley bffs. Seriously wtf was all that? Anyway this is all sus bc from what ive seen before in other shows when a main love interest leaves and a new main character replaces them, that means something. JLH replaced Connie Britton as far as big name actress but i really believe Eddie replaced Abby as far as importance in Buck's life. Do i think they brought him in with the intentions of turning him into a LI? No but they sure fueled the narrative from the get go. I think they saw fans reactions and started testing the waters.

Moving on to LIs in this season. We find out Eddie has a kid and the mother is not in the picture (eddie made sure buck knew that right away). Then later on we find out he's technically still married. shannon comes back and we get Eddie finally getting to confront this head on. He tries to get his family back together for the sake of his son. Its big for Eddie's character bc all he does and all he's ever done is for his son. Then Shannon asks for a divorce then she dies bringing this arc to an abrupt end and leaving eddie heartbroken.

meanwhile Buck is still waiting for Abby. Then he finally accepts that shes not coming back and decides to move on. He goes right back to being "Buck 1.0" with Taylor and feels bad about himself because that really isnt him anymore. He wants a real relationship. So then Ali calls and asks him on an actual date and he agrees. This is his first try at a relationship after a heartbreak. in tv these don't usually work out but are used to develop the main character's growth. We don't really see much of her but she breaks up with him so.

S3: This is Eddie finally dealing with his feelings/guilt season. This is also the season I think we really see how important Buck is to the Diaz boys. S2 had cute buckley-diaz family moments but those could still be interpreted as a best friend and his best friend's kid. This season though... after the tsunamic episode was when i really started to fully believe buddie was going canon. This season is solidifying their bond not only as Buck and Eddie but as Buck Eddie and Christpher. As I'm writing this I realized neither of them really has a love interest in this season do they? Ana is introduced but then is clearly presented as definitely NOT the right choice for eddie and especially for Chris. Then they counter that with Buck helping Eddie build a skateboard for Chris that he can use as opposed to Ana's ablest remarks about how he can't do it so just move on to something else. Then we get Buck's reaction in Eddie Begins. Buck has seen his team his friends his family get hurt on the job before but he has never reacted the way he did when it was Eddie in danger. Again solidifying just how much these two mean to each other. Don't even get me started on this season being when Eddie changes his will offscreen. Anyway we get Abby back and Buck finally gets the closure from that relationship that he needs to move forward into a serious relationship.

Now S4: jfc s4....IMO this is the only logical season to get the ball rolling on Buddie and they sure did that with 4x14 despite everything else. So i never thought they would be the first serious relationship for each other after the heart break theyve both experienced. It wouldn't be fair to their character developments. Buck tries dating Veronica and that clearly doesnt work but we know hes now open to dating again. We get Buck Begins where we see why Buck is the dare devil he is. The only way he got his parents attention as a kid was to put himself in danger. They bring back taylor and how to they ultimately get together after she friendzones him? She thinks hes in danger and suddenly wants him. As much as i hate it this is really gonna be a relationship where Buck finally stands up for himself and sees his own worth and realizes he deserves more. He deserves someone who sees him and loves him for who he is. He deserves to be chosen, something Abby Ali his parents dont do and what i think taylor wont end up doing. I feel like shes gonna choose her career over him. Maybe not in a "I'm breaking up with you" way but maybe she takes a new job and want to do LD (hes tried that twice and it didnt work for him. hes not gonna want that) or she could ask him to go with her but he wont. His family is in LA. His job is in LA. Eddie and Chris are in LA and he won't leave them. Then we have Eddie finally deciding to move on and try dating again so they bring back ana. To me it's not gonna work out so I'm not bothered at all lmao. It's interesting that they'd choose her though. Someone we already know Eddie doesn't trust with his son. There's also more buckley-diaz family scenes of them being coparents. The hildy episode, Chris running to Buck when hes mad at eddie, Buck being the one to tell Chris Eddie got hurt, then Buck staying with Chris and taking on the guardian role without him even knowing just how much that role really does belong to him. He didn't do it out of obligation. He didn't do it because he was asked to. He did it because he thought it would be best for Chris. Finally to 4x14. This is by far the biggest "Oh shit this is it. This is the beginning of buddie". We find out Eddie changed his will a year ago and has just been sitting on this info. I think Eddie knew back then what it meant but he wasn't in the right mindset to accept what it means so he kept it to himself. I think he finally started allowing himself to go there during treasure hunt. The man was jealous yall. Carla coming back and her comment about doing whats best for him and not chris is his oh shit moment. I think he wouldve broken up with Ana a few days after that if he had the time lol. He gets caught up in the mother/son sl then this poor mf gets shot by a sniper. The way that whole scene was filmed btw was not in a bff way. That was a lover watching his beloved almost die in front of him. Buck again puts himself down and Eddie decides this is the moment. He needs Buck to see how important he is. He wants buck to know how loved he is. So he sits there talking himself up to it and finally lets Buck know just how big of a part he is in Eddie's family. Buck's previous scene is him saying he wants someone who wants him back then here is Eddie saying he needs him...Chris needs him. wtf.

So with S5: I think Eddie knows and Buck has a feeling but he's not sure so what i would do is spend s5 with Eddie basically showing Buck his feelings but not exactly getting in the way of Buck's new relationship because Buck has to be the one to make that choice. Id also have chris feeling the different shift with buck having a gf like he did with Eddie. This newfound info wasnt just dropped on us for a "Aww so sweet" moment. This will business is gonna be a part of a bigger storyline. I'm hoping its with Eddie's family during maybe 5b.

So what I think would be the best timeline for canon buddie is 5a eddie already having either broken up with ana or is gonna break up with her, Buck choosing himself and ending things with Taylor by midseason finale, them bringing in Eddie's family in 5b and maybe then being when Eddie confesses his feelings for Buck. Then 6a we could get them walking on egg shells around each other not really knowing what to do bc this is all so new for both of them. This could bring just the right amount of comedy and angst especially them awkward and flustered around each other at work. A big blowup can happen between them for added angst (maybe an arguement before one of them or both of them is put in danger) then a midseason finale kiss. Then trying to find the balance between their personal relationship and their work relationship during 6b.

I don't know how long Fox shows last but procedurals can last a long time. I'm not sure thats gonna be the case for 911 especially with all the main cast staying that long so i think this would give us at least a whole season (S7) of canon buddie.

As far as then being presented as straight, there's been more seeds planted about buck being bi. A few i can remember off the top of my head: all of 2x1 lmao, maddie's comment about bucks boy crush on eddie, buck hinting at thinking eddie is cute when he thinks maddie is talking about him, the christmas elf, the comments on the instagram livestream, idk if youve watched it or not but TK's comment to Buck in the crossover episode, and like you mentioned Maddie's casual comment about setting him up with Josh. All we really know about Eddie's love life is he married Shannon when they were young and is trying with Ana so it could turn into a whole storyline for him.

I'm so sorry this is so long and took forever but i I hope i actually answered your question and didnt just get lost in rambles lmao.

[mugionthewater]

Tsumugi Shirogane Deepdive: Prologue

I’m in a DR mood right now, and really enjoying revisiting Tsumugi in particular, so I thought I’d do a chapter-based retrospective focusing on all the cool Tsumugi material! A reread project especially rewarding for a character like Mugi, so I’m really excited.

In this series, I’m focusing a lot on all the foreshadowing, and also what we can extrapolate about Tsumugi’s true character along the way. I’ll be doing this chapter-by chapter, including the prologue as well as an installment for her Free Time Events.

Full spoilers for V3 under the cut.

The Pre-Prologue

We first see Tsumugi in the gym by the exisals to get their uniforms and their memories. Tsumugi herself has four lines of dialogue in this scene, nothing that particularly stands out, but there are a couple of things worth noting about how she (and everyone else) is dressed.

Kaede describes how she was kidnapped on her way to school, and it sure looks like that’s the case for almost everyone in the room. We’re used to seeing DR characters in flashy outfits that vaguely resemble school uniforms but actually reflect their individuality, so when the game first shows them in an ensemble lineup like this, it’s a lot more striking.

Not so much in this CG. While there are plenty of visual details that tell us about these characters (Saihara’s already hiding under a hat in his sprites; Iruma is revealing; Kiibo and Gonta are buttoned up and orderly, but Kaito’s shirt and jacket are undone to show a bold-colored undershirt), their uniforms look like they’re doing what uniforms are supposed to do: be bland and blend in.

What about Tsumugi? Tsumugi wears a basic uniform like everyone else, but this is where we get the game’s first indication that all is not what it seems with this girl. The clue is the blue. She is the only one in the lineup whose primary color isn’t a neutral tone. What’s more, it’s the same shade of blue Tsumugi is associated with throughout the game. Visually, part of her is already in character as Tsumugi Shirogane, SHSL Cosplayer.

Of course, there’s a much bigger item foreshadowing Tsumugi as the bad guy, which is that in advance of everyone getting their “memories”, the main emphasis is their new clothes delivered by the Monokubs.

There are a couple of reasons the clothes are significant. For starters, there’s a direct line to Tsumugi’s cosplay talent. For anyone inclined to suspect her before starting the game on account of her talent (and her general don’t-look-at-me-I’m-not-suspicious vibes), this is immediate theory fodder. This also primes the audience to look at the setting of V3 with a critical eye, between the contrast of the kids’ boring outfits and their flashy new ones and the Monokubs making explicit references to starting the “story“, there is an immediate suggestion of artifice that runs all the way down to their identities. Not for nothing is Kaede’s magical girl transformation visually similar to the memory light.

Another thing: pre-memory light, the person in the room whose outfit is the least uniform-y is Amami.

At the very least, it’s a look that’s noticeably more casual than what most of the cast is wearing. After Chapter 6, we know that Amami made it to the end of the 52nd Killing Game before he and Tsumugi were condemned to execution via participating in the next killing game- which he seems to be realizing in this scene- so it’s possible they’re coming right off the heels of the last killing game. It’s an ongoing mystery what his relationship with her was like up to this point? Does he know she’s the ringleader? Is “Tsumugi Shirogane“ anything like the person she was in the last killing game, assuming she was even there?

I’m not confident Tsumugi really switched to a new persona for the 53rd Killing Game, even though fake identities is kind of her whole deal. I’ll get more into why in this series, but I think a lot of the character we see in the game is the “real“ Tsumugi, to the extent that such a person even exists.

Introducing Tsumugi Shirogane: Professional Cosplayer, Sex God

If you go back and read the promotional blurbs for V3, Tsumugi’s mention her tendency to get so lost in thought that she’ll ignore everyone around her. This little trait isn’t super weird at first, until you realize later in the game that she doesn’t carry the shtick past the first chapter. It’s like she wrote the character blurbs herself, realized everybody has a wacky “thing“ that would come up immediately in the introductions, and came up with an act of low-grade wackiness so she’d fit in in the prologue.

This is great stuff, looking back. It gives an intro in brief to the many contradictions of Tsumugi Shirogane. On one hand, it’s overly phony and performative. But on the other hand, there’s a core of truth there about her character- she really is someone who stays in her thoughts without a care for anyone around her, albeit less in the cute way and more in the horrifying sociopath kind of way.

It also tells us something important about Tsumugi’s commitment to the Killing Game. She cares about maintaining the integrity of this world and its characters, but is pretty indifferent about maintaining a role for herself. She doesn’t give a shit about having a storyline or even much of a character. The pleasure of DR comes from what she can get as an observer/consumer. 

This is entirely consistent with what she tells Kaede and Saihara about herself and her feelings about cosplay in the actual introduction.

This is the ethos that makes me wonder how dishonest Tsumugi really is. She’s dishonest as hell, of course, but given that she later applies the entire DR LARP reality show experience as “cosplay“, what she says about her convictions largely rings true. She clearly cares about making her tribute an authentic one (lol), which extends to her being the primary creative director inside her fiction bubble.

It partly explains why she spends the next five chapters being little more than furniture. In her mind, her job as a producer precludes her from being a character in her own right, because doing anything to pull focus is tantamount to self-promotion, and, well, that’s an abuse of power that gets in the way of the story!

(sidebar: there are some fascinating things we could speculate about what she says about cosplay relates to her relationship with the rest of Team Danganronpa and the outside world, but this post is getting long, so I’ll save it for another day)

Like everything else about Tsumugi, it’s not until the end that you can fully contextualize how sinister she’s being here. What she passes off as a cute passion for cosplay is actually a bone-deep sense of consumer entitlement taken to a logical extreme. Tsumugi is a more vicious indictment of terrible nerds and a selfish fandom than anything Hifumi Yamada could embody. She loves DR so much, and feels so strongly that nobody should be participating in DR with any corrupt motives, that anything less than the real deal is unacceptable. To this end, she will happily transplant entirely new emotional realities on the others so that even the emotional torture of the Killing Game is authentic. In Tsumugi’s selfish nerd brain, this is the important part of the drama of Killing Games, and anyone who disagrees with her approach is a fake fan who doesn’t deserve any kind of creative control.

Anyways, there’s more to say about Tsumugi’s introduction, so moving on

Some pretty overt foreshadowing here. In the Japanese script, her reference is ep. 53 of Kiteretsu Daihyakka instead of Doraemon. I like the change for the dub, even though it’s pretty obvious. Someone who knows DR primarily through the dub is less likely to know about the franchise’s connection to Doraemon, anyway.

Tsumugi also points out the weird dragon statue in the hallway that will lead into a new part of the school down the line. It’s a neat little metatextual trick on the audience, because it’s the kind of thing that’s not suspicious at all on a first playthrough. She’s an NPC in a DR game, of course her dialogue is gonna point out plot devices that will be relevant shortly, but on a reread you know she’s being deliberate about it. This is far from the last time this kind of thing happens with Tsumugi.

Lastly, this charming observation from Kaede about why she’s maybe not so plain afterall.

Kaede puts it in the worst way possible, but it’s interesting that she, a person with a generally good read on people, decides immediately that there’s more to Mugi than meets the eye. Not only that, she relates it specifically to an audience spending a lot of time looking at her. If she were any less gross about it, Kaede making this kind of observation would land like a big clue.

This leaves us with the biggest question from the prologue: if Kaede wasn’t too busy being horny and gay, could she have put two and two together and thwarted the ringleader?

There is SO much more to say about Tsumugi, so I’m really excited to dig deep into other chapters!

[rickyandgina]

Season 2 Predictions

Section 1 characters- Nini: YAC. I'm almost 100% sure that she goes, it would be such a shame if she didn't take this amazing opportunity and allow herself to experience something on her own. But if she doesn't then what? Well as we know there is going to be rival school in the next season. North high. Maybe she goes here? In the limited amount of promo photos released from season 2, she's absent. Aside from what seems to be the first episode. My theory is that she may not get as big of a role in play and go somewhere else where she feels more appreciated . IDK but I'm guessing there is going to be a major arc for Nini venturing off to find herself outside of East high and her relationship with Ricky. Whether that be Youth Actors Conservatory or NHS. We wanna see growth girl!

Ricky: Ricky, I'm more unsure about. I think he's complacent in his relationship with Nini and is comfortable with having his security blanket back. Obviously the news from Nini is going to shake him and mirror his breakdown after his parents and them separating. Do they separate though? I don't think so... It would such a fan disservice to spend all season building them up only to break them down again an episode later. What I do think is that his main strory-line is going to be learning to cope with people not always going to be around and how to make relationships work that aren't always 100 percent perfect. Also I think that we will see him really getting into theatre for himself and taking it more seriously the second time around.  Without Nini there I don't think he will try out for the main role- I'm guessing Gaston as there's promo photos of him acting out a scene that just seems so like that character. Also there's the question of Gina and his relationship with her being unresolved,,, but I'll talk more about that later.

EJ: Oh, I am so excited to see his character next season. He arguably got the best development last season and we can already see this change. With Ricky maybe out of the picture? I think we'll see him try out for the main role and get it. The beast just fits his storyline so perfectly and I think it would be such a shame for them not to go that route. It's also his last semester at the school and nice way to wrap up his storyline and send him off. Or they could go the route of Gaston for him, but ehhh Idk. It just seems like reverting. BUT there's also episode 2 (type casting) so we will see. Overall I think we will see him be the person he was becoming in the last few episodes. More kind, caring, and not so into himself (maybe a little tho). His relationship with Gina is obviously is going to develop- hopefully friendship- and I think that it is going to be nice seeing these two characters who were so vain and focused on winning last season be able to lean into one another. Let's look forward to likeable EJ.

Gina: My girl. My bean. My ride or die. I am so excited to see her next season, it's a little unhealthy lol. Okay, so for her I am also uncertain where they are going to take her character. She obvi stays from the promos. But what does that mean? Clearly she was struggling with her decision so I think that will be her main story line for episode 1- in the end her choosing to stay. I think this will be mirrored with Nini choosing to leave, then from there just straight up DRAMA. From the promo photos we see her, Kourtney, Ashlyn all in the auditorium trying out. From the looks of it, it seems like they are all trying out for the same part. Belle??? If she gets the part... I don't think so. It just doesn't seem like her time yet. So where does this leave us? Maybe she also goes to North High where she can shine brighter and bigger... maybe she stays. I could see it both ways, Gina is not used to being somewhere for long and it is so in character for her to go off to find something new and better for herself. This could lead us to her having to face off against her friends and roommate, struggling in doing so. Or they could have her stay, not get the main role and snag a smaller part. Having her stay would allow them to develop her relationship with Ricky. Especially with Nini gone. Idk either way I'm excited to see her and all her new friendships with the crew.

Carlos: I think once again we will see him as Ms.Jenn's right hand man. Running the play and being his beautiful controlling self. Maybe he gets a smaller role in play as well. These are only the minor parts of his story. What's the big stuff? SEB! I really think they are going to develop this relationship more, hopefully we will get to see them together and happy. Not just happy though, what's a good romance without hardship? Being queer and in high school is not easy for a lot of teens, though while in their bubble of theatre kids they are all accepting and happy, maybe they will show the other side of this, of people who aren't so willing to see things differently. Out of the two I think Carlos would be the one to struggle with this. Clearly Seb is not afraid to be who he is and own it. So maybe we will get to see them struggle through this together, and obviously come out on top in the end.

Seb: I'm hoping he will get a bigger role in the play, what role though? Idk its hard to say. But as we know he's becoming a series regular so we will get to know more about him. Maybe about his home life and the relationship he has with his family. We know that his family works on a farm and he's expected to do that too. So maybe we will see him stand up to his parents and take control of his life.  Overall I'm just hoping and thinking that they will develop his character more and allow us to see a different side of him outside of the theatre and in a more realized setting.

Kourtney: She is so going to shine this season! Main role? You bet ya.. I think she's getting the part of Belle. Or at least fights for it. From the way the last season ended and them alluding to having more in store for her, and the announcement of the second season, all dressed in yellow. It just makes sense. This girl is so talented and ready to take center stage. I'm also thinking they're going to introduce a romance for her... hopefully. It would so fun to see her get her love story. I'm thinking one of the new characters that is going to be introduced as there really aren't any prospects in the cast already. We'd love to see it! On the other side, maybe she doesn't and goes to North High? IDK Tim said that people go over there, so we will see.

Ashlyn: Another one of my favs, can't wait to see her and Gina's relationship. She is obvs going to be like a big sister to Gina, guiding her and helping her through her second semester. Again, I see bigger things for her in this upcoming series. Big Red, need I say more? So clearly they are going to showcase this couple and develop them more as the season goes on. Big part of her story line this season. Moving onto the play, again, in the sneak peeks we see her with Gina and Kourtney trying out. I think she is going to take a leap and tryout for Belle and fail. Maybe this takes a shot to her confidence and we get to see her struggling with not being chosen. Having to take a back seat again, IDK. I could see it happening. Anyways, I think the points of her plotline are mainly going to be about her relationship with Big Red and her stepping up and into the spotlight.

Big Red: The Lefou to Ricky's Gaston? Probably. I think this season he will get a role in the play, it's only fair. Larry is sooo talented they have to let him tap dance his heart out and kill his role in the production. Again we will see him be support a system for Ricky and him dealing with Nini and all of their drama, but he's going to have his own going on too. I think that we will see A LOT of miscommunication between Ashlyn and Big red. They just aren't that great at communication. Clearly. This could be a big source of drama for him and his story line and allow us to see more of him and the writers to develop his character outside of the nerd archtype. I really hope.

[jazy3]

Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 17X7

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

They did it! I can’t believe it! They actually killed DeLuca off! I’m so happy right now! As long time readers will know I have never been a Andrew DeLuca fan and I speculated back in the summer that they might be planning to write his character off after it was revealed that the planned finale for Season 16 included an explosion that was supposed to claim the life of one of the characters. I speculated that DeLuca was the most likely candidate with Tom and Jackson being the most likely runners up because I felt that they had gone as far as they could with DeLuca’s character and there wasn’t much left for him to do on the show.

Add that to the fact that the actor who plays DeLuca said a bunch of stuff to the press last year where he spoiled some pretty major plot points and stated that he knew things about where the show was going when he hadn’t even read a single script for the season yet and I was pretty sure his days were numbered. That being said, the show had teased us a bunch of times about firing, killing, or writing off the character during seasons 15 and 16 and they never went through with it so a big part of me was skeptical that they ever would.

But it turns out I was right! His days were numbered and they wound up killing him off in the Mid-Season Premiere! I’m still in shock. It hasn’t really sunk in yet to be honest. This episode honestly made me wish we’d gotten to see the remaining episodes and finale of Season 16 as planned. Based on what we know it looks like the plan was for Richard, Bailey, Meredith, and Carina to stage an intervention, DeLuca was to go away and get treatment and return to the hospital only to die tragically in an explosion.

Season 17 would have opened with the characters finding out about that and mourning his death and I think it would have been interesting to see Meredith navigate that as in the Finale Hayes asked her out and she said yes. It seems likely that if the COVID-19 Pandemic had not hit when it did and shut down production and altered filming for this season we would have seen Meredith and Hayes go out for a drink and start dating.

Seeing Meredith navigate the loss of her ex-boyfriend who she was no longer close to while in the beginning stages of her relationship with Hayes would have been very interesting and I’m sorry we didn’t get to see that. I’m also sorry that due to safety restrictions Meredith and Hayes haven’t had much screen time this season, but it looks like that’s about to change as I’ll get into a bit later.

Back to the episode at hand. I never liked DeLuca as a character and I hated him with Meredith so I’m glad that they killed him off and that we never have to deal with that nonsense again. I’m glad that they caught the human trafficker Opal and took those people down. I was never super invested in that storyline so I’m glad they wrapped that up. I feel so bad for Carina though. She’s a great character and is wonderfully acted by Stefania Spampinato.

My heart broke for her in this episode because while I won’t miss her brother I know that she will and will be absolutely gutted when she finds out that he’s died especially after she worked so hard to get him help and treatment for his Bipolar Disorder. I’m glad she has Maya there to support her.

LOL at Bailey sleeping through the whole damn episode! What did I miss indeed! That poor woman slept through DeLuca getting stabbed, almost dying, not dying, having surgery twice, and then actually dying as well as the other shenanigans going on at the hospital. I loved that she was asleep at Meredith’s bedside especially after they spent a good chunk of Season 16 fighting.

I also feel really bad for Richard in that he’s obviously grateful that DeLuca helped save his life and wanted to help and when Owen turned him down because it wasn’t a good idea for him to scrub in Richard lurked in the background in the OR gallery the whole time to make sure that everything was okay. Plus he can’t talk to Meredith about it right now because she’s in a coma which must be so difficult for him. The extra stress also puts his sobriety at risk and that worries me.

I got to be honest I am struggling to understand Teddy’s point of view this season. She’s being really awful! She’s being cruel to Tom. She was cruel to Owen. I don't know what Teddy expected to have happen. Both Cristina and Amelia walked away from their marriages to Owen and moved on with their lives in large part because they realized Owen was in love with Teddy and always would be.

And then she finally gets what she’s wanted all these years and the minute she realizes Amelia’s baby might be Owen’s and not Link’s she runs back to Tom and has a several months long affair with him and then drops him like a hot potato as soon as she realizes that the baby is Link’s and after Owen finds out about the affair she refuses to talk to Tom for months and then comes crawling back to him and wants to be his friend after Owen makes it clear he wants nothing to do with her. WTF?

I feel bad for Tom. I really like his character. He’s super interesting and complex and he deserves better than someone who treats him like that. Tom is a good man at heart and he treated Teddy like gold and in return she’s done nothing but break his heart and stomp all over him when he’s already down. He deserves someone better. I’ve never been an Owen fan, but honestly Teddy is behaving so horribly I’m on his side on this one.

They had some great scenes in the OR together, but Teddy clearly read too much into it. Every time he gives her a crumb she’s convinced he’s forgiven her and wants to give her a second chance and that’s not it at all. Owen has been clear. He doesn’t forgive her and he doesn’t want to get back together with her. All he wants is to co-parent peacefully and work together as colleagues because he values her skills as a surgeon. That’s it.

It was cute to see Teddy Face Timing with Leo. I’m glad they are finding safe ways to incorporate the kids into the story. Speaking of which, the scene where Amelia and Maggie tell Zola that her Mom has been placed on a vent and she might not come off it was heartbreaking. That kid has grown into her own as an actress and really holds her own in that scene.

Her line about how she didn’t want them to tell Bailey or Ellis yet because they’re too young to understand broke me heart. Zola’s only a few years older than them but she’s old enough to understand the impact of what’s happening in a way that they can’t. And she remembers how hard it was when Derek died. When Cristina left. When Alex left. She doesn’t want to put her siblings though the same thing especially when Alex’s departure is still so fresh for them and they never got a chance to really know their Dad. The fact that Zola can recognize that at such a young age is raw and heart breaking.

We saw Winston and Maggie reconnect this episode which would have been super hot and enjoyable if Meredith hadn’t just been put on a ventilator! The scene where Jackson showed up looking for Maggie was too funny! I loved the scenes with Jackson, Link, and Winston in the backyard having beers! Winston has a great sense of humour and seems to be a calming presence. I like the idea of those three being friends.

Link’s face when he realized that Winston doesn’t know that Maggie and Jackson used to date and are also step-siblings. I’ll be interested to see Winston’s reaction when that comes out. I loved Link’s rant about how worried he was about Meredith and what her declining health and potential death was doing and would do to Amelia. Did anyone else catch that he called Amelia his wife? I’m calling it. They’re foreshadowing an Amelink wedding!

I liked hearing Jackson talk about how Meredith is family and they’re all worried and Winston’s comments about how all they can do is just keeping moving physically and metaphorically. I’m also loving Amelia and Maggie’s wardrobes this season. Their sweaters in this episode were gorgeous! Hats off to the wardrobe department! They’re looking good!

I loved seeing Jo and Hayes work together again because I love their friendship, but to be honest I was expecting more of the friendly teasing and banter of last season where she egged him on about Meredith and they traded barbs. Their scenes in this episode were a lot more intense and agitated. She totally played him with that line about Meredith.

He kept saying no to taking Luna to see her Mom and so Jo made it personal for him. If Meredith asked to see her kids Hayes would never say no and he would move heaven and earth for her. By making that connection Jo got him to agree to her plan. I also love that the reason he kept saying no in the beginning was because of what happened to Meredith.

She went from laughing and joking to being put on a vent and he doesn’t want to run the risk with any other patient and it’s obviously eating him up inside. He misses her. He cares about her and he’s clearly terrified about the possibility of her not waking up. That being said, Jo’s line where she compared Alex leaving her for Izzie because he found out he had kids he didn’t know he had and sending her a heartfelt letter to Hayes spending years watching his wife and the mother of his two boys die of cancer was way out of line. Super not okay. I really think that Jo is going to adopt that baby. I think that’s why they are setting up her interest in OBGYN.

In other news, Nico is still a terrible boyfriend to Levi. I honestly don’t know why Levi puts up with him. Levi really shone in this episode I think. He felt responsible for what happened, but instead of bungling things and making things worse like he might have done in the past he got out of his own way and asked Dr. Khan who was a vascular surgeon in Pakistan prior to immigrating to the U.S. to take his place.

I feel like this episode implies that the Beach is limbo now as I don’t know how else DeLuca could have ended up there as he wasn’t someone who was close to Meredith the way that Derek, George, Richard, and Bailey are. Not sure how I feel about that as I was kind of liking the is it a COVID dream is it the afterlife ambiguity.

Onto next week’s promo! I’m not excited that they appear to be setting up an episode in which the other characters mourn DeLuca’s passing as none of the other characters apart from Carina were really that close to him. They spent the last two seasons establishing that everyone hated his guts, considered him a nuisance, and only put up with him because they had to. So to me the other characters mourning him doesn’t feel authentic or real. It just feels forced.

There are several things I am excited about though. Seeing Maggie’s reaction to his death I think will be interesting. She was visibly upset and ran to his side when Alex beat him up in Season 13 and mourning the loss of your ex-boyfriend who you were no longer close to while being in a committed relationship with someone new I think is an interesting dynamic. She’s kinda standing in for Meredith here because she’s on a vent.

I’d like to see Catherine support Richard and make up for her horrible behaviour last season. And the best thing of all: Hayes!!! In the promo trailer we see Hayes sitting at Meredith’s bedside talking to her about how she needs to fight and how they all need her to fight. Bring it on! It’s about damn time! And Derek’s back and he’s … fishing? I’m excited to see what happens there and if they actually get to talk and have a real conversation this time. It has also been announced that Sarah Drew will be returning for a cameo as Dr. April Kepner this season so I’m excited for that!

Until next time!

[honeybeeadventures]

ALICE  IN BORDERLAND || a honeybeeadventures review

FULL DISCLOSURE: This review may be a little bit biased and that's gonna have to be okay this time because boy, do I LOVE this show.

If you're a fan of foreign tv shows and you haven't heard of Alice in Wonderland by now, then you may be living under a rock. This show, which premiered during the holiday season of the treacherous year known as 2020, is Netflix's most popular live-action adaptation to date. Yes, that's right, adaptation. That is because Alice in Borderland is based on the manga of the same name written and illustrated by Haro Aso.

This time, I will try to hold back all of my spoilers since this show is full of twists and turns and honestly, deserves a blank first impression going into it. I want to make sure that everyone who watches this show because of my review gets to experience it fully without my recapping the events haha. I will try to summarize without ruining anything, though.

Alice In Borderland is a Netflix Japan Original Adaptation of the manga that bears its namesake by Haro Aso which originally ran from April 2011 to April 2016. The show premiered on Netflix on December 10, 2020, and just 14 days later, a second season was confirmed by Netflix.

The show follows Arisu Ryohei and his friends after they witness fireworks in the middle of the day and are dropped into another world where most of the people in Shibuya are gone and the only way to survive is to risk their lives playing games that extend their visas and their right to live in that world. Every game is treacherous and usually ends with a loss of life, though some games do have finite solutions that can save players and preserve their well-being. Along the way, Arisu ( a name which is the Japanese way of pronouncing Alice, by the way ) meets a cast of characters that will seem fairly familiar to you if you've ever seen, read, or really have ever even heard of Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carrol or any of its adaptations.

I typically talk about diversity when I review shows, however, as this is a Japanese show, it's not really fair or easy to judge them on that metric because of course, everyone in the show is Japanese ( as they should be since the manga is set in Tokyo ). However, I will say that in the show, there is a character who says that everyone is free to sleep with whoever they want, no matter what gender and there is also a character that is a part of the Alphabet Mafia ( LGBTQIA+ ... I should make a glossary for this blog lol ). While only one ( confirmed ) members of the Alphabet Mafia isn't a lot, it is based on a manga, and considering the manga is written/illustrated by a Japanese man who was in his 30s at the time, I'm gonna chalk that up as the progressiveness of Haro Aso while still wanting to keep his audience.

Now, down to what you really came here for. I'll list the scores below before we get into why I gave them these scores.

Originality of Content: 8/10

Production Quality: 9/10

Resolution: 6/10

Acting/Cast Members: 10/10

Ability to Keep Interest: 10/10

Provocation: 8/10

Obviously, this show did really well by my standards, and here's the breakdown so you can see why.

Originality of Content: 8/10

If we're being honest here, Alice in Borderland definitely isn't the first manga/anime based on the premise of playing a game to survive or get somewhere in the world ( see: Kakegurui, No Game: No Life, .hack//, Gamble Fish, etc. or Rengoku Dead Role which is actually...very similar to AIB ). However, despite this, it still feels like there's some strong originality brought to this concept. Combining the Japanese love for games and a classical western story gives Alice In Borderland just what it needs to easily become a fan favorite. As someone who really favors game-based anime and manga ( because I really favor game design ), I think that the way that Alice In Borderland is a refreshing nod to the genre.

There's a couple of reasons for this but I'll boil it down to just two. The first is that it's not predictable. The issue with a lot of the game-based animes that I'm familiar with is that they are fairly predictable since most games work the same way, but with Alice In Borderland that is different. The rules to each game that is played seem so simple that they seem deceptive but they also seem complex in the way that a riddle is simple yet complex. Every answer that first comes to your mind is probably going to be wrong and you need to think about it more deeply than that. Sometimes, when the rules of the game were being explained, I found myself wanting to pause to see if I could figure out the solution of the game, too, as I watched Arisu think of it, as well.

The second reason is that Alice In Borderland keeps things fresh with its cast of characters. Rather than some characters being evil because that's 'just the way they are', Alice In Borderland really speaks to the effect of the pressure that is put on young people to succeed and how that can end up in them being more mentally lost than they were, to begin with. It also highlights struggles with gender identity, self-worth, complex family relationships, and living up to one's potential. It does this in such a way that even when a character is downright evil, such as Niragi ( IYKYK), there is almost a feeling of pity for them. This isn't because you sympathize with their actions but more so because it isn't difficult to see how the pressure of life turned them into this monster that you are now watching there. I also enjoyed the fact that there wasn't as much dramatic irony in this show as in many others. While dramatic irony is never a necessarily bad thing, it was nice to genuinely be surprised when a character did something instead of knowing that someone was plotting behind someone else's back.

Production Quality: 9/10

This is a statistic that comes with an asterisk of context and that context is that before this, I had been watching Uchu Sentai Kyuranger and if you know what the production quality of that is like then you understand how it may have influenced this show's score a bit. Even without the comparison fallacy of the two, though, AIB scores high in production quality for one reason more than any other to me. For a show with a lot of blood and death, I wasn't unwilling to believe that these people had actually died. Yes, I'm sure that no actors were harmed in the making of this series, however, if I was a little more naive, I might've doubted that a bit. After all, Live Action adaptations are definitely not known for their believability. I will give AIB the benefit of the doubt in saying that this concept wasn't that difficult to pull off since most of the injuries were similar to what you'd expect on your typical action movie set ( compared to...you know...something involving sci-fi or fantasy) but even in the scenes where people get their necks blown off by explosive collars, it looked like they were nearly decapitated...the way that you would expect if someone's neck was blown off by an explosive collar. All in all, if you want to believe it, you will. It's definitely not a hard stretch.

Resolution: 6/10

Okay, okay, so if you've read the manga or have even glanced at the r/AliceInBorderlandLive subreddit then you know this is kind of an unfair score since...well, they're not done. There's more to the story and the eight episodes that we've seen thus far are only about a third of what AIB has to offer since the manga has two sequels, one of which will be finished on Feb. 18 of this year. However, I will see that statement and raise it with "What if it hadn't been such a great success?" I'm all for ending on cliffhangers to force the network or in this case, Netflix to continue your show but since the first season of AIB covers so much of the storyline, it almost feels wrong to end it short the way that it did. I did like how they had the big reveal of the villain at the end and the way they showed what was coming next but it did feel a little anti-climactic when I realized I was on the last episode since it seemed more like a mid-season break type end instead of a season finale. Since there is a sequel to AIB, I wasn't feeling too discouraged but it's definitely something to think about when watching. If you don't plan on reading the manga, you might be left content starving and questioning until sometime near the end of 2021.

Acting/Cast Members: 10/10

If I was just scoring this show on acting, then it would've gotten an all-kill because each and every single actor in this show from the side characters like Nijiro Murakami and Dori Sakurada to Kento Yamazaki who plays Arisu himself is beyond talented and amazing. It is important to remember that all of the characters in this show had a life before they were transported to the Borderland and in this twisted world, something about the changes that make them different than before so in a way, these actors are responsible for not only playing the characters but also the characters past selves before this growth period in which they change into something either completely opposite or completely different than who they were before.

Somehow, this cast manages to take characters that are already so established ( in the manga ) and become them to the point that looking at them within the role and looking at them outside of the role, it almost seems as if they are really two completely different people. As I said before, some of the characters in Alice In Borderland have a correlation to characters from Alice in Wonderland and have their own unique backgrounds on top of that. This gives to the depth of the characters and makes them dynamic but on top of that, it makes them complex, and yet, these actors seem to have the act of embodying these characters down so well that it astonishes me to see them in other roles and know that it's the same person.

I'll be breaking down my three favorite performances to give you a bit of insight on the reason why this show's cast is well-worth looking into.

Dori Sakurada as Niragi Suguru

So let's be honest here, as much as we all like to pretend that we're immune to someone being attractive just because they also prove to be an awful person, but if we're being honest with ourselves, we're not and I am most certainly no exception to that rule. Dori Sakurada is a handsome man whose good looks are only matched in quality by his amazing acting skills. If you're familiar with his work then you know exactly what I'm talking about and if you're not, then I'd recommend watching 3B no Koibito ( Available with English subs on Youtube ) or Scum's Wish ( Available on Rakuten Viki )  to get an idea of how varied this man's acting skills are. In AIB, he plays a character that is somewhat villainous and can almost be classified as your stereotypical movie sociopath. Yet, still, there's something intriguing beyond just his good looks. Dori Sakurada's performance breaths new air into the lungs of the character of Niragi by not only becoming the villain but also, by picking up the mannerisms and master gestures associated with the character that make him such a memorable part of the story. I haven't seen Dori's full Filmography but the character I have seen outside of AIB are a complete left turn from this character which makes me think that the casting director at Netflix Japan needs a raise for having chosen someone who looks so sweet to be such a villain.  

Nijiro Murakami as Chishiya Shuntaro

When it comes to characters that become scene-stealers, Chishiya Shuntaro is definitely one of them. This character is so powerful that I, even, named my cat after him. That is a fact of which I am not ashamed. From the second episode of the show, when we are first introduced to him, he becomes an integral part of the framework of the game he is involved in and it is obvious that we will see him again. That being said, there is no way to word Murakami's performance besides 'integral' as my friend put it, "I literally could not imagine anyone else playing this character." As Chishiya, Murakami takes on such a life and ease in the character that it's almost difficult to believe that the sly facial expressions paired with his nonchalant air are not in his nature and are, in fact, something that he donned for the role. I look forward to seeing not only more of Murakami as this character but exploring more of his filmography in general.

Aya Asahina as Hikari Kuina

Kuina as a character is someone that the protagonist does not meet until a few episodes into the show but when it comes to backstories and characters with rich personalities, she shines compared to a lot of other characters I have seen like her. I won't spoil her backstory for you since she's definitely someone who represents something that's a little bit rarer in stories from more reserved cultures but she definitely deserved a mention in this category due to her amazing acting skills and her flawless stunt scenes.

Ability to Keep Interest: 10/10 || Provocation: 8/10

While the rest of my stats got their own individual evaluation, these are going to be combined and the reason for this is because they have the same reasons for their scores. As I mentioned before, Alice In Borderland takes a new spin on the 'play games to live' genre that is so common amongst anime and manga and for that reason, it was able to keep my interest so much so I finished watching it over the course of two days. It was also a deeply thought-provoking situation because the nature of the games and the backgrounds of the characters forced me to think up my own games and my own ideas of where the characters whose backstories are not explained could've come from. That being said, a lot of the thoughts that the show provoked did end up becoming depressing, especially after reading the manga because I discovered that some games could not have had a better outcome due to their simple rules and that made me very sad because even if I am not attached to or fond of a character, I still do not enjoy their downfall.

Overall: 8.5 = DING! DING! DING! WE HAVE A KEEPER!

Overall, I enjoyed Alice In Borderland enough to have rewatched it one and a half times since I first watched it a few weeks ago. As someone who rarely goes back to shows that involve plot twists and suspense because I already know what's going to happen, that really says a lot for not just the storyline but also the acting and amazing intricacies that are in the show. I still feel like each time I watch it, I glean some new detail or fact that I hadn't thought of before and I come to understand the games a bit more with each passing scene or episode. I also feel that the more I rewatch the show, the more I sympathize with even the villains and come to value and understand their motivations and roles. 8.5 out of 10. I WOULD RECCOMMEND.

Thanks for reading!!

[canmom]

Animation Night 60: FATE

Or to be precise: Fate/Stay Night: Heaven’s Feel!

It’s Animation Night no. 60, a big old milestone! Six tens and you’re all still lining up for me to pour anime into your eyeballs. Wild.

So what’s the plan? Tonight, we’ll be watching some of the biggest anime film series in recent years: the Ufotable adaptation of the Heaven’s Feel route of the eroge visual novel Fate/Stay Night as a trilogy of anime films.

No, come back! I promise it’s good!

So. Fate, and the broader ‘nasuverse’ such as Tsukihime, is a sprawling franchise, replete with word salad titles like Fate/kaleid liner Prisma Illya. Where do you begin? I suspect if you’ve heard anything about it it’s 1. king arthur is a girl lol and 2. “people die when they are killed”. Or maybe you know a weeb who’s obsessed with the Fate gacha game. Perhaps you’ve heard about ‘most famous anime trap’ Astolfo (who’s from the gacha game). But like... what actually is it?

To give the basic pitch, the Fate series depicts ruthless wizards summoning instances of historical and mythological figures in a ritualised fight for the Holy Grail, a nigh-omnipotent wish-granting magic artefact. The main character, Shirou Emiya, is (get this...) a high-school boy (no way) who finds himself unexpectedly drawn into the wizard battle after he accidentally summons a powerful Servant called Saber - ‘King’ Arthur, who is in this universe, was actually a girl.

From there... things get very complicated, but in short the wizards enact various complicated schemes to kill each other and their servants, we learn more about the conspiracies afoot in every direction, alliances are made and formed, and eventually after the cast thins out, we find out about the horrible secrets of the Grail.

The original Fate/Stay Night was an eroge visual novel by the pseudonymous author Kinoku Nasu, co-founder of Type Moon - a doujin circle turned full-fledged studio. This is to say, the sprawling storyline full of intricately cross-referenced lore, wide-ranging mythological allusions, and elaborate magic systems was initially ‘just’ a porn game.

Whether the eroge succeeds as a work of erotica, I can’t say, since I’ve encountered it exclusively in adaptations... but the general sense I’ve receved from people who have read it is ‘not at all’ and a general sense of feeling sorry for people who might have bought on that basis. But Fate became wildly popular all the same, even more so than Nasu’s previous novel Tsukihime... enough to launch a massive media franchise, especially when it became a gacha game. But more on that later.

As with most VNs, it’s a game with multiple routes: Shirou can get with one of three characters, and each one takes him to a different ending...

in the ‘Fate’ route, it’s Saber herself. they have to fuck for magic reasons or something.

in the ‘Unlimited Blade Works’ route, it’s wizard girl Rin Tohsaka, who is from an old and evil wizard family but herself one of the more well-adjusted characters

in the ‘Heaven’s Feel’ route, it’s a different wizard girl, Sakura Matou, whose magical abilities are augmented by the efforts of her abusive wizard dad’s nasty worm rituals

The eroge was given a light novel prequel, Fate/Zero, written by Gen Urobuchi of Madoka fame. This focuses on a character who would eventually become to be Shirou’s adoptive dad, the cunning utilitarian Kiritsugu Emiya, in a previous round of the Grail War. I’ll talk more about that in a minute.

Got all that? ...yeah that’s just a blizzard of names isn’t it. Don’t worry, the film will introduce it more gently! Let’s talk about anime...

The first brave souls to attempt turning Nasu’s massive novel into animation were Studio Deen. They took on a version of the story consisting primarily of the ‘Fate’ route, but with elements borrowed from the others. Unfortunately, their version was... not a huge success, remembered mostly for janky lines like the above and poor animation. I haven’t seen it, but I’m told it’s the most insufferable depiction of Shirou, and generally even extreme fans of the franchise (such as this guy) seem to suggest giving it a miss.

The second attempt came at the hands of the renowned studio Ufotable, who first took on adapting Fate/Zero in 2011-12; their interpretation proved a hit, and they followed it up in short order with an adaptation of the Unlimited Blade Works route; this pair is so far my entire exposure to the franchise, and they form a pretty good story in their own right.

Ufotable is now just over 20, and kVin (of course, who else?) has a detailed retrospective on the studio’s life here. Founded as a small studio in 2000 by Hikaru Kondo and a group of experienced anime industry workers in several departments, it grew around a vision of a studio prizing cross-discipline work:

his dream was a studio where creators could gather around a table and, regardless of their standing and specialty, have a say in a very diverse array of activities—“the more you do, the more likely you are to do something well” being his amusing motto

Kondo is elsewhere described as an outright ideologue, and he has a little of a chequered reputation now after he got done for tax evasion; but for better or worse he’s the personality most defining this studio. His first engagement with Nasu’s work was an extremely ambitious seven-film adaptation with The Garden of Sinners; with Fate/Zero they settled down into a pattern of lavishly adapting high-profile works, with Fate being one of the biggest. With Ufotable (when a project goes well) you can expect the flashiest compositing tricks, rigorous and expressive key animation, and all kinds of striking shots and setpieces...

So that brings us to tonight’s movie trilogy, Heaven’s Feel! These movies took on the last route of the VN, and with the time and budget of a film production, they can push that fancy animation even further. You can read about some of the names involved here (where would I be without you kVin?) for the first film...

As noted above, this is Sakura’s route; one in which Saber gets possessed by evil powers so the main Servant character is ‘Rider’, i.e. the life-draining witch Medusa... and thus, the one where we finally get a confrontation with Kotomine, the sinister priest who runs the Grail War. In the meantime: lots of character drama and astonishingly choreographed and effects-rich fight scenes key animated by people like Nozumu Abe and Hironori Tanaka.

But also, well. Focusing on a character like Sakura takes the story to some pretty dark places, and I’ve been advised the second movie especially involves some ecchi moments - by which I mean, iirc, lavishly animated bodily fluids and a lot of stuff involving worms - that might be rather uncomfortable! So I’m taking a bit of a risk showing this; I think if we could handle Made in Abyss we can probably handle this, but I’m definitely not going to throw us in without a bit of warning.

I’ve gone to the trouble of pulling down the fansubber recommended 34GB encode of these movies which took several hours... you can witness a fierce debate in the comments section here about the best ways to filter grain and whether honorifics make these ‘cancer subs’, as is typical of nyaa, but passion begets commitment to really fancy subtitling I guess. Of course I’m then going to absolutely murder this beautiful encode by cramming it through real time Twitch! I’m terribly sorry.

Anyway, I’m already over time with this writeup; we will have to save any sort of in depth thematic analysis of the Fate series for some other post. (Probably not written by me.) What I am pretty sure I can promise is that these movies should represent a kind of spectacle of all that is possible in the current era of anime, the era of the webgen and the digital composite... in every affective direction. Let’s take the plunge together! (Nasuverse nerds, this is your time to shine. Make sure we understand what we’re missing out on by jumping in at totally the wrong place!)

Animation Night 60 is starting... right now! Head to twitch.tv/canmom, I’ll be up in just a second.

[reachfolk]

I know you probably have a million of these so forgive me for adding to your list but I couldn't resist. 😅😅😅

Obviously, you know about my last Dragonborn Azirina, whose love interest is Farkas. (If we're going by base game storyline. She does have another, but that's for another time.)

So, I would love to see what you come up with for Azirina and Farkas.

don't worry about it at all hun, they're fun to do but it takes a while cause i want them to be good. i have a bunch of requests but u get Friend Privileges so i'm doing yours first lol. the first few are her good end and the later ones are based off her bad end!

this turned out really long (cause i know more about azirina than i did about the other characters that were requested), so i'm putting it under a read more!

goodbye by jhariah | spotify.

"i never thought i would muster the courage to leave here. i broke free of what kept me trapped here and i don’t think i’m coming back here"

hadal ahbek by issam alnajjar | spotify. youtube. translation.

“life will give you time to forget the tears of these days that have made your eyes so tired”

i don't want to set the world on fire by the ink spots | spotify.

"i don't want to set the world on fire honey. i love you too much. i just want to start a great big flame down in your heart"

ready now by dodie | spotify.

"you saw through me. all this time i'd forgotten people are kind. i was hurting, and you knew, so you showed me what to do."

it's alright by mother mother | spotify.

"it's alright, it's okay, it's alright, it's okay. you're not a demon, there's a reason you're behaving that way."

curses by the crane wives | spotify.

"won't you stay with me, my darling when this house don't feel like home? oh ashes, ashes, dust to dust. the devil's after both of us"

guillotine by jon bellion | spotify.

"the secrets you tell me i'll take to my grave. there's bones in my closet, but you hang stuff anyway"

without you by oh wonder | spotify.

"can't be on my own without you. i'm a little bit lost without you"

out of my head by loote | spotify.

"you get me out my head, i think i like it. [...] you save from myself"

problems by mother mother | spotify.

"i've found love in the strangest place; tied up and branded, locked in a cage"

needed a change of pace by jhariah | spotify.

"oh, how could you love me so? oh, with all i've done and the things you know? but still, you plead with me. baby, i guarantee you're better off if you let me go"

so nice, so smart by kimya dawson | spotify.

"you're so nice and you're so smart. you're such a good friend i have to break your heart. tell you that i love you then i'll tear your world apart. just pretend i didn't tear your world apart."

trust me not (hero and villain duet) by backseat vagabond | spotify.

"you think you're a villain, but i know you're not. under all that angst and anger is a beating human heart"

goodbye, my danish sweetheart by mitski | spotify.

"so i don't blame you if you want to bury me in your memory. i'm not the girl i ought to be"

run from me by timber timber | spotify.

"run from me, darlin'. you better run for your life."

battle cry by beth crowley (this is more specific to azirina than the ship, but it's so fitting i had to include it) | spotify.

"and i know exactly what i'm for: to hurt and destroy and nothing more"

[warriordreamer95]

RWBY Volume 7 Crew Commentary Notes!

All credit goes to Sweetfable over on Reddit! Sweet, if you’re on Tumblr and have already posted this or want to, let me know and I’ll take this down!

Chapter 1

Featuring Kerry Shawcross and  Miles Luna.

Miles says he was hoping people didn’t figure out Atlas was a floating city in the sky before they got there. Even in World of Remnant, they were very careful with how they worded things to avoid spoiling this fact.

A large portion of ep 1 was intended to be in V6

Originally it was going to end with Penny being revealed, dealing with the Grimm, and ending on “Salutations”

Almost everything up until the Penny moment was how it was going to be in V6. For production and story reasons they decided to end V6 with just seeing Atlas.

Mantle is a little more Blade Runner and utilitarian looking, while Atlas was made to look like it was created by Apple. Two different futuristic looks.

When making the four kingdoms, they compared it to parts of the real world. Atlas and Mantle were two different versions of America

The drunk guy (Drunk Mann) we see insulting Blake is based off of Joel Mann and the other is Dustin Matthew (Grape-kun).

We saw Pietro (his hand) for the first time in Volume 3. They didn’t want to make him too similar to Dr. Weller from gen:LOCK, and so they made him to be like a ‘big’ kid. It’s where Penny gets a lot of her attitude from.

Kerry wants to do a show with all the old RWBY characters

V8 was harder to write than V7

It was a challenge in this episode to make it clear that Atlas is a new place for some characters, but a familiar one for several others, but that the Atlas in V7 is a different one than what they remember.

They try to theme the grimm to the location. So Grimm from Atlas are those that are from the Ice Age.

Miles compare Grimm to Pokemon. Some will pop up in every region, while others are region specific.

They had a lot of discussion surrounding what they wanted Penny 2.0 to look like. They considered giving her a conflict of her being a clone or not having her memories, but ultimately with the amount of stuff that needed to happen this volume they felt that it wouldn’t have been able to be done well.

Chapter 2

Featuring Kerry, Conner (director), and Kiersi

Forest became a fan-favorite

This episode was tricky to write because it was getting close to being an exposition dump

They had to balance movement and how much the characters can emote (especially when characters lie this episode)

Ironwood’s office shifting to present his plan was a cool idea + it was another way to stay in the room without having things get boring

Really wanted team RWBY to feel like they were on the right path and had something to follow. Establishing the trust theme early on.

Qrow and Ironwood’s relationship is super interesting to Kerry, and he wishes they could have explored it more. Conner pushed for Qrow’s hand to be lower in the hug scene (lol)

Conner jokes that he also proposed Ironwood should propose to Oscar when kneeling

Ironwood giving the relic back was his biggest sign of trust

They comment about how positively Penny states ‘it’ll be just like Beacon again!’ when she got destroyed there in V3

Kerry calls Watts ‘Daddy Long Legs’

Chapter 3

Featuring Kerry and Miles

They were confused when they saw people on Reddit and Tumblr think that this volume would have a shopping montage

Team RWBY jumping out of a plane is a callback to landing strategies and to see how far they have come since V1

The crew thought everyone would love Jaune’s new haircut, and was shocked when everyone immediately hated it. Miles wanted to see Jaune grow up a bit, so he liked the change.

They wanted team RWBY to start acting like and learning from professional huntsman

Miles wanted Atlas to feel like the Beacon days at first, and first came up with the idea that some Atlas academy professors would teach them. But that evolved into mentors, which eventually became Atlas’s best of the best.

The Ace-Ops are not only fun characters, but also foils to some of our main characters to help move their stories along

The Ace-Ops having five members + a team name not based on a color was very intentional. It was to show that Ironwood doesn’t care about Oz’s rules and would rather have an efficient team.

Eddy came up with the name Ace-Ops. Each member is based off an Aesop fable.

The mine scene has us seeing the SDC logo everywhere. Adam, as a terrible of a person as he was, when he was younger, was arguing with someone at a SDC place and the other person grabbed a brand and gave him his scar. So seeing the logo all over the mine was very intentional to put that in the forefront of Blake’s mind, and Yang notices

The fight with the Centinel grimm was originally supposed to be a bit longer and there was going to be an alpha variant of the centinel (which they imply we will see in the future)

Some characters got more upgrades than others. Weiss is already perfect, so she didn’t need any changes. Miles was excited that they were able to give Ren heavy rounds to shoot with. Ren has his father’s dagger on his arm

Many things that seem like retcons are actually not, and instead is just Kerry and Miles learning how to tell a story while simultaneously telling a story. So things were not always explained well early on.

Qrow and Clover were an interesting couple of characters, Miles says. For a long time Qrow was the guy that worked best alone (compared to Shadow the Hedgehog) and wanted him to interact with people that aren't his nieces and their friends. Clover was made to be a total bro and like Captain America- who always makes luck puns. He constantly feels like he is in an action movie because things always go right for him, so he doesn’t need to look where he’s about the jump. Which ultimately leads to someone who relies too much on their semblance. He rides the line of confidence vs arrogance. Clover is kind of person that Qrow always wanted to be. At the beginning of their friendship, Qrow doesn’t really like Clover and finds him irritating. But eventually it evolved into friendship, and later tragedy.

They left RWBY out of the battle of the Ace Ops vs the Geist to showcase how they didn’t need RWBY to get things done. It was their moment to shine

Wanted to give a sense in these first few episodes that, maybe everything will work out okay

Spoiler alert: It won’t

Chapter 4

Featuring Paula (co-director), Dustin (co-director), Eddy Rivas, Kerry Shawcross

Wanted a chance for the characters to breathe a bit before bigger things went down

Kerry loves the lighting in the first scene. They referenced how lighting looks in the tundra

The first draft of the scene where Ironwood is giving orders originally happened in his office

From V5 they learned it’s great to be efficient with sets but they can fatigue the audience and the crew

Originally the celebration wasn’t going to be in Amity, and instead it was going to be in Atlas’s version of an auditorium.

The ship Jacques arrives in is the same one Winter arrives from in V3. It’s a Schnee company ship

Paula thought it was important that Blake hold Weiss’s hand and be the first to stand by her side when Jaques is yelling at Weiss since Blake knows what it is like to be in an abusive relationship. Ruby and Yang didn’t even really know a father would talk like that to his daughter.

They were excited to write Penny and Winter’s ‘mirror-destiny’, which they laid some of the foundation for this episode

Qrow talking to Ruby was barely on the outline for the episode, but it was on their wish list if they had time to get it in.

Dustin says ‘fatherly’ when describing the moment and Kerry is like, ‘you just opened up a whole can of worms’

Eddy loves the ‘Jim’ gag when referring to Jaune.

Watt’s entrance was a difficult shot to execute properly because of the door.

Chapter 5

Featuring Conner, Eddy, and Kerry

They originally weren’t sure about having a montage in this episode

The penguins we see for a moment were possibly going to be grimm penguins

Kerry wants RT to sell the cards Clover has, and Eddy thinks it’s funny he would have cards with him emblem on them.

They liked having the moment of Clover and Qrow in the middle of this episode to show that Qrow is now becoming a mentee of sorts.

Adding in the Robin encounter was a late addition to the outline. She wasn’t going to be introduced until Chapter 6 during her rally

But they wanted to put the two factions head to head earlier on.

It was also the first moment of Clover being a bit duplicitous.

The plot line of tying the supplies through Robin’s storyline was a late addition while writing

Weiss vs Winter with summoning is a callback to V3C4 with them training together

Weiss being able to sit on hard-light (a block) is something Kerry was unsure about at first

Originally Weiss and Winter going to see Fria was going to be Winter getting an alert from Ironwood and having to leave, and Weiss following her suspiciously. But it worked better as Winter revealing a secret while Weiss was still keeping one

Chapter 6

Featuring Paula, Kiersi, Miles, Eddy, and Kerry

Eddy is the one who came up with the idea for the middle part of the season while he had a really bad fever

Originally Tyrian was going to make it look like a bunch of Atlas soldiers fired on civilians in Mantle. Then Eddie thought it should frame RWBY, but ultimately they went with framing Penny.

Nobody has ever offered Penny a fist bump before, so she wanted to do it perfectly

An old draft had the team and Ironwood doing an investigation at this warehouse post-massacre

There was also no montage in C5, just them sitting around a table talking about what they did

Miles also mentions there was going to be a scene in C3 with Marrow trying to bond with Blake about being a Faunus, and also about him specifically being a Faunus in Atlas who is a part of Atlas’s military team. But that episode was so packed they wanted to move it to C6, but then that episode also became too packed. But they plan to get to it in future volumes

They wanted to show how much the Happy Huntresses care about each other and about Mantle

They also originally did not want to have anything political in this season. But the more iterations they did, they felt it was the best course of action to do that with the story.

They wanted to give the heroes a high personal moment with Renora kissing right before things went down

Penny was not used to fighting sneaky enemies, so that is how Tyrian got the upper hand

While they don’t usually check back up on extras, things turned out that we kept seeing Drunk Mann and Grape-kun throughout the season to represent the city of Mantle

Chapter 7

Featuring Conner, Kiersi, Miles, Eddy, and Kerry

Fiona’s semblance was originally going to be Torchwick’s semblance, and it was called Deep Pockets. But they never found a moment for him to use it. So they decided he could be a great example of how some people don’t unlock their semblances

Originally some of C7 was meant for C4 where they found out earlier that Tyrian was involved with things

Miles wrote the description we got of Tyrian’s past (Salem first contacting Tyrian), and it was one of his favorite things to write.

Qrow looking at Clover when he is willing to go with Ironwood’s plan was meant to show some distance growing between the two

We were going to get more of Ren explaining why he was feeling the way he was and agreeing with Ironwood, but ultimately they are pushing it to next volume

Originally Blake and Yang were going to directly reference Adam when they had their talk, but they later figured out how to reference him indirectly

The arm robot Pietro has in his office was originally going to have more of a character like the robotic arm Tony Stark has

They tried hard to get Maria more scenes, but there was often no room for it

Miles realizes he was dumb to suggest that Pietro cover Watt’s face with his thumb while looking at a picture since they already did that with Raven in V3

The lady in the photograph with black hair is not Cinder’s mom (which was apparently a fan theory)

Robin encountering the Bees was a late edition to the outline. But it gave every member of RWBY a moment

They wanted the vault in the Academy to feel similar to the one in Haven but not a direct copy

Miles believes that if Ironwood would allow himself to be more vulnerable more often things would’ve gone differently

The invitation to the Schnee manor was originally going to be to a news conference

Chapter 8

Featuring Dustin, Miles, and Kerry

They didn’t specify what the hood ornament on the car would be, so Dustin was happy when it came back as a velociraptor, which references a raptor Monty Oum would put in photos with RWBY characters

Fans have guessed what direction they are going with Whitley. He starts off as a jerk, but Miles implies that is going to change. It is also an easy way to remind the audience of how the elite act

At the table, Jacques’s chair is bigger than everyone else's

Miles wrote the gag of JNR sabotaging Whitley’s conversation with Weiss and expected it to take only a few seconds, but as more people worked on it the longer it got

The stack of food was taller than Dustin expected it to be, and they even had to scale it back because it was going to be even taller

Another power move of Jacques is to only give a few people wine, as well as not giving Penny any food

Willow was originally going to be in the intro

A joke was made about Salem being Jaune’s sister in the V6 intro before everyone knew who she was

None of the writers expected Penny and Winter to have such a bond this volume initially

Miles wanted to portray when Weiss is talking to Willow that she doesn’t really know how to act around an adult with such an adult issue. Since Weiss is quite young (Miles compared it to him having to help an adult with an adult issue when he was 13)

Chapter 9

Featuring Paula (director), Kiersi, Eddy, and Kerry

It was difficult to keep the shots interesting in the dining room

We see Grape-kun and Drunk Mann again this episode

In earlier chapters they made sure to have an orange glow to represent the heating in Mantle since they knew it would be turned off in chapter 8

They wanted to showcase that Ironwood was starting to have doubts, which would later be clearly seen in episode 11

The foot soldiers (AKs) that the Grimm are able to overwhelm in only a few seconds were meant to represent that Atlas wouldn’t provide them with much defense against Grimm because they don’t care enough

Every storyline was coming together in this episode, and it’s tricky to make a setup episode like this not seem like filler

Ruby and Oscar’s awkward interaction came from them both ‘riding the high’ of the moment where it seems like they each have great plans that will go well.

Oscar is starting to tap into some of Ozpin’s memories, as alluded to when he mentions how Atlas is held to a higher standard

Terry the grimm being hit by a fireball (part of a plane I believe) was a call back to Jurassic Park

They struggled a long time with where to put the Neo reveal

Chapter 10

Featuring Conner, Dustin, Kiersi, and Kerry

They felt that if they showed a lot in the first scene of the episode, they wouldn’t have to saturate the background with other fires and crowds.

The shot of Weiss’s knight being summoned and overshadowing Marrow is setting up their fight in C12

When seeing the shots of the enemies infiltrating the kingdom, they didn’t know if they wanted to show Neo and Cinder or Tyrian and Watts first. But they went with Neo and Cinder because it would show that they thought their cover was blown, when it would really be about the other two.

The place Neo and Cinder are staying at is an Atlas ‘high-life’ apartment

They always knew Elm would have a rocket launcher/bazooka, but never got the time needed to show it until now

They had to restructure Mantle a bit to allow the huge elephant to fit in the streets

The main characters working with the Ace Ops in this episode was to make it so things hurt so much more after events in the following one

All the background characters apparently have little backstories as they made sure they didn’t appear in two places at the same time

Ironwood jumps down a ridiculous number of feet to meet Watts. They had to cheat to not make that so obvious as well as say this is animation logic so people working on the shot would stop questioning how he could possibly make it.

Chapter 11

Featuring Kerry, Paula, and Miles

Originally a gravity biome in Amity was going to appear in V3C5. It was going to be Sun and Neptune vs Pyrrha and Nora. It was written, boarded, and ready to go but they realized there wasn’t time for it

This was a hard episode to write. A lot of stuff that needed to happen, and happen in a specific way

Watt’s gun was inspired a 20-shot revolver Kerry saw on Reddit

Ironwood losing another hand represents him losing another part of his humanity (possibly confirming he lost his one organic arm)

The first cut of this episode was 23 minutes and was deemed too long so they had to scale back, but they still felt they kept in everything that was needed to make the episode great

Initially the Tyrian vs Qrow, Robyn, and Clover fight was going to be a chase that turns into a fight that turns into another chase. And Qrow is the only one that could keep up with Tyrian since he can transform into a bird. Qrow would land in front of Tyrian and say ‘that’s enough’ and Tyrian would ask, ‘are you able to talk when you’re a bird or do you have to wait until you’re a person to throw your one-liners?’ (Tyrian asking the real questions here) Tyrian’s lack of self-preservation would be shown even more. He would have run down an alley packed with Grimm and would just trust that he could’ve made it through

The fight with Tyrian was initially going to be more of a Tyrian vs Qrow fight, but Miles loves that they made it a 3 v 1 so it could show off Tyrian’s exceptional skill

The fight was also a callback to the first Tyrian vs Qrow fight, where Ruby tried to be good back up for Qrow but was ineffective. But instead this time have Robyn and Clover be effective and more experienced teammates

Clover is defense, Qrow is offense, and Robyn is picking away at Tyrian with her long-ranged weapon

There was going to be more discussion of where Oscar was at the end of the episode, as well as a whole bit where the Ace Ops and the kids land and they get a hand-written note saying they’ve been compromised instead of getting it via scroll, but it turned out to be too much

The scene of Ironwood talking to RWBY and his turn to being against them was the most important scene in the episode, and something everything in the season had to build up to

Miles said it was about time the two sides met face to face with RWBY meeting Salem

They wanted to make Ironwood’s progression into villainy subtle and make sense

Salem made things personal for Ironwood, so he felt like he had to come up with a solution

They wanted more Cinder and Neo in the volume but had to cut back. But to compensate they had to be instrumental to the collapse of Ironwood (Miles first said collapse of Atlas so wonder if he slipped up)

Chapter 12

Featuring Dustin, Conner, Kiersi, Eddy, and Kerry

They wanted to have a false sense of resolution in the previous episode just to blow everything up here

Eddy handled the Ace Ops vs RWBY and Winter scenes while Kiersi handled the rest

Kerry learned from V5 that having everyone in one room for a fight doesn’t work well

Eddy is a big Weiss stan

Clover has no idea who he’s up against with Tyrian, and thinks of Qrow as the big threat, as well as Tyrian manipulating Qrow

Clover saw both Qrow and Tyrian on the wrong side of the law, so he felt like he had to fight both of them no matter what

They made sure team RWBY can’t just stomp on the Ace Ops, but still show their teamwork. Plus the lack of Clover being there didn’t allow for the team to have a ‘cheat code’

This is another episode they had to trim down in length

Cinder was always going to lay waste to the medical facility and attack Winter

They also wanted to do a Qrow vs Tyrian reprisal

Kerry said he loves Clover

It was crazy for Qrow to meet someone that was a genuinely good person

Chapter 13

Featuring Miles, Kerry, and Eddy

The Neo vs ORNJ fight could have been shorter

At one point they wanted to show Cinder using maiden magic to bring some dead AKs (Atlesian-Knight) back to life to fight Penny (was going to be some sort of puppet joke).

But Miles realized that Cinder could just blow up the room and bust through the walls

Ren is struggling with some heavy emotional stuff that is not resolved at all this volume, but it is hinted there will be a lot more for him next volume.

The writers knew a lot of people wouldn’t be happy with Ren’s attitude this volume. But he still cares about Nora, even if he doesn’t always communicate it well

Miles cried during the voice over session of Fria’s scenes for this episode

They had a lot of talks about how the maiden power would be transferred. They debated if Penny would have to kill Fria.

Originally one pod was going to be broken, with the one with Fria being in tact. But because Penny is a robot, she could ‘remote-interface in’ and get the powers. But that still felt like stealing, and they didn’t want to go that route.

Oscar has matured so much in his role (joking call him Farm Man)

Ironwood is still expecting Oz to show up. He still really wants that guidance

Ironwood arguing with Oscar was the finale scene they wrote this episode

Ironwood feels that he is backed into a corner and is doing the only sensible thing.

Winter was waiting to be the Winter Maiden her whole life, but in a split second she gives it all up

There was one line in Oz’s monologue they were struggling with for a whole day

They loved the idea of ending the volume on almost an identical shot from where they started

Neo’s look after Cinder takes the relic and doesn’t thank Neo for getting it is setting up some things for V8 (probably a betrayal)

Oz came back at that moment because he heard what Oscar said to Ironwood and that made him brave enough to return

Miles reveals that the Grimm whale is based on Monstro from Pinocchio

It is once again said that Volume 8 is the hardest one they had to write so far. Miles seems super excited about it

Volume 8 was made with some fan-input in mind (since it was still being written by the time V7 ended), but Volume 9 will be the first one written in a vacuum

[maariarogers]

How They Steal Seojun’s Scenes and Ruin A Tiny Essence of Seojun and Suho’s Character(s) in the K-Drama: A Study

Hi everybody!

First and foremost, I’m not online a lot, and whenever I do lately, I mostly try to spend it by fixating on a certain fandom — which, this time, happened to be the latest K-Drama “True Beauty”. I’ve written about two other study / analysis / meta which you could find here:

Thoughts On True Beauty and Why I’m On Team Suho

Why Webtoon!Suho is Superior and K-Drama!Suho Needs To Catch Up 👏

I’ve recently noticed during my scrolling that there has been a lot of tension between Team Seojun and Team Suho, which... broke my heart a little bit, because for the last eight episodes, I wasn’t really aware of it. I just thought everybody was having as much fun as I was just watching the K-Drama, but you know, we still have our favourites and we still have times when we disagree with the direction of the show, but by the end of the day, it was still something fun to watch, to distress with, and to share with like-minded fans.

Regardless, this is a warning that I don’t write with any intention to specifically target any characters or storyline, whether it be webtoon or the K-Drama. I do equally adore all of the cast, the production; the characters in the webtoon — and I will forever be thankful that I was fortunate enough to stumble upon the story as I did.

To add some context: I am a film student graduate, and I’ve always been interested in objectively dissecting characters, especially from a franchise, or things that came from a raw materials like True Beauty is. For your reference, I am currently at Chapter 128 of the webtoon series, although I am aware of spoilers beyond the chapters. As for the drama, I am at Episode 10 while I’m writing this. (Started at episode 9, continuing after episode 10.)

This is purely an in-depth analysis, if you’re into those sort of things, mainly discussing the major differences between webtoon representation of characters Lee Suho and Han Seojun in particular, and their mirrored selves in the K-Drama. Under the category, I will be touching on:

What the K-Drama changed the characters specifically

How They Stole Seojun Webtoon’s Scene and Character

Why Some of It Worked, Some of It Will Never

How They Highkey Ruined Seojun and Suho’s Dynamics

Why They Didn’t Need to Change the Characters At All, really

Another warning, just so any readers are aware, I am primarily a Suho x Jugeyong fan, but I’ve never really minded Seojun’s relationship with Jugyeong, either in Webtoon and K-Drama. Again, this mostly has a lot to do with how excellent the execution for Seojun was in the webtoon particularly — but I believe we’ll be getting into that.

Also, this is mostly to address the differences of webtoon vs. k-drama (and why some scene worked, why some scene didn’t work), and while I’ll be touching on the issues underlying the characters a bit, for a more thorough analysis or thoughts on the mental health represented by the characters, I would recommend reading:

By Tumblr User imjukyung (speaking about post-episode 10, specifically for Suho)

True Beauty: True Trauma and Unsettling Regression by tumblr user life-rewritten

Last Warning: This is about 5,000+ words. I... yeah. I have nothing to say except it’s written.

1. What Changed Specifically

I think the massive change an audience could probably observe — or if you can’t observe, you would find yourself being annoyed by it at certain point — would be in Suho. Yes, we’re starting with him.

I’ve been noticing a lot that people do heatedly comment that Suho’s “boring” — which, to an extent, I agree. (I mentioned this too in the first meta.) He is a massive play on the “cold and distant” trope, which, in my head, I’d like to call, a massive Edward Cullen case. That trope is often repetitive, most of the time it’s horribly executed, and it’s just, yeah, I’m not a big fan of them.

But again, I’ve mentioned this before, it works for Suho. I think this was what he was meant to be. As reference, in the webtoon even, Sua was never impressed with Suho, and she did repetitively say that the only “good thing that was going for him” was his good looks, and that he’s “boring” (in fact, I believe this is a fact since high school towards their adulthood). So yes, I think he was written like that on purpose.

On top of that, in the webtoon, compare to the K-Drama, Suho really does — nothing.

I’ll circle back to this specific characteristic because it relates to Seojun again, but I do wanted to point out that it is actually a prominent thing that’s to do with Suho. All he does in the webtoon, really, is study. Some of the things we learn later while we read would be that: he reads horror comic books as a sense of escapism, and he’s a good cook.

That’s it.

We would learn later, of course, that it is more than that. This personality is intentional and, most importantly, purposeful. What we’ve perceived as “boring” was used right against Suho — especially in the Prince of Princes arc, where the influencer called Suho out for “never trying his best” when the other contestants, Seojun and Aiden if we’re being specific, truly had something to lose while they were doing the show.

So, it wasn’t just, something the webtoon author decided Suho to be and held him no responsibility over, no — she crafted Suho like that from the beginning, she made us get used to it, and then, slowly, we see cracks of Suho’s “perfect” image and how that backfired. And Suho? He paid for it.

More than the simple cold and distant trope, his continuously monotone exterior actually did raise important questions in the long-run: For someone so smart with such a solid background, why does he seemed the most lost out of the Seojun-Jugeyong-Suho trio?

In my second meta, I wrote this:

It felt like the writers were desperate to fill the gaps for Suho possibly being “dull” [while playing] this typical cool and distant character — when, in reality, Suho’s existence as is was quite enough. He didn’t need to steal Seojun’s fighting ability, and he especially didn’t need to rob Seyeon’s musical passion too, to be interesting and have depths of his own [...]

Which I feel unfortunate about when it comes to K-Drama!Suho, and I still stand by it now. That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy the K-Drama, because it could really hold up as its own separate storyline and timeline, but if we start to critically compare, we do see that, in reality, Suho could carry his “boring” character well and the K-Drama probably just didn’t know how to do this well, or thought the reception would be bad, so they added all of these unnecessarily profile traits to have him stand out.

To add, even when all he really does is study and read comic books, Jugyeong still likes him. To Jugyeong, Suho doesn’t really need to be more than what he is - their shared interest and their strong loyalty in ensuring they’re each other’s safe haven when it comes to emotional struggles were already enough for her; and for Suho, Jugyeong’s company as is had been sufficient to make him happy, or have a better outlook in life.

2. How They Stole Seojun Webtoon’s Scene and Character

This is quite a sensitive topic for Seojun’s fans, so I will try addressing this very, very carefully. If you have anymore to add and discuss, feel free — I’d love to know what else I’ve missed or might have overlooked.

In this specific section, I think I’d like to focus on three (3) major Seojun scene that was stolen. The band-aid, the wallet, and the spicy food. Of course, I’ll be touching on things they’ve stolen beyond those scenes because they did incorporate a lot of what Seojun should be experiencing to Suho, or other characters, and why this wasn’t okay — or it couldn’t be held up. But let’s start with the scene first and we’ll slowly walk to what other aspects of Seojun the writers think we wouldn’t notice being stolen.

The Band Aid Scene

In the webtoon (spoilers to those who haven’t read) in Chapter 34, Suho got into an accident in an attempt to save Jugyeong. This led her to be injured on the knees, which, after Seojun was called in, he helped treated. 

In the K-Drama, Suho was the one who treated Jugyeong’s knees – but this happened very early in the series and it was specifically triggered because Jugyeong tripped on her way to run Suho’s errands.

Personally, for me, I didn’t really mind this scene was “stolen”. Now, okay, before anybody comes at me, allow me to explain why: I didn’t think it mattered? Which probably didn’t help my case in fending a lot of you off lol but — I just didn’t think it mattered because in either scenes, it was still an in-character thing for them to do. Each boy would still assist Jugyeong and treated her knees even if they’ve switched places.

What I really meant was though, the scene didn’t really take any of Seojun’s important and/or core personality away from him — which you’ll find what I mean more as we delve on soon — it was just an act which anybody would’ve done for Jugyeong in that moment.

Especially in the webtoon, the bigger focus was more towards Suho who just got into an accident. There wasn’t really any fundamental value or any obvious motivation towards the scene unless you counted Seojun finding out that Heegyeong was Jugyeong’s sister - which, even then, it was brushed over quickly because, of course, we focus heavily on Suho’s state towards the end, and we’re stirring into what really happened between the three S (Seojun-Suho-Seyeon).

In the K-Drama, it was set up in such a way with a clear motivation: Suho apologising for pushing Jugyeong to such a limit and therefore elevating their statuses in comradeship, and for Seojun to notice and took an important interest in Jugyeong after seeing Suho and her together, triggering his consecutive contacts with her afterwards.

Each of them could really hold up as their own separate acts, and both boys are still heavily in-character.

The Wallet

In Chapter 32, Jugyeong (bare-faced) met with her bullies and they had a quick confrontation in WcDonalds. We realise the bullies didn’t really think they were responsible for how they acted, and didn’t apologise. This left Jugyeong devastated, so she left the restaurant premises and went home without realising she dropped her wallet. At the restaurant, Seojun’s friends picked it up — but Seojun was the one who identified the wallet’s owner, and came back just as Jugyeong, now fully in make-up, came to get it. Despite probably having eaten, Seojun invited Jugyeong to eat, noticing she’s in a bad mood.

In the K-Drama, Episode 6 if I’m not mistaken, Jugyeong stumbled upon her former bullies bare-faced. She managed to run out of the restaurant premises before shortly realising that she dropped her wallet. When she turned, she saw Suho was with her bullies, grasping the wallet from them. She ran away, he chased after, and they had their mini confrontation and Suho shielded Jugyeong from being recognised by their schoolmates.

Again, like the first, I didn’t really hold up any grudge over the scenes? Mostly because the difference in context between them?

Allow me to explain: in the webtoon, it was clearly placed that way to show the slow elevation of friendship between Jugyeong and Seojun; that scene also progressed to Jugyeong meeting Seojun’s group of friends later, which triggers to more scenes of them in the future i.e. Jugyeong trying out clothes at the request of Seojun’s friend’s girlfriend and Seojun obviously falling hard during the whole process.

(I also think like these are the first few instances where we’re established a place Seojun and Jugyeong bonded over most besides school, i.e. the shopping street background, because them shopping together in that group, or just the two of them, are relatively mentioned or brought up again and again.)

But that can’t realistically work for K-Drama.

In the webtoon, we’re allowed for a slow-paced friendship between Jugyeong and Seojun to form, which was important, because it was meant to bring us to the tipping point wherein Seojun transformed from being that best male friend (and why he stayed being the male best friend), to her boyfriend. The why, of course, is important — but we’ll get to that soon.

In the K-Drama, we’re not allowed the amount of pace. And, more than that, all of Seojun’s friends in the webtoon, who are high school dropouts or older (and therefore were not attending school) I believe, are replaced by the massive group Seojun has in their shared high school. So, the opportunity as is wasn’t really there, and it was later restricted by the time frame of a sixteen-episodes.

I’ll be touching on the fact that they do make up for this with various scenes, various new opportunities, but you can still see how Seojun falls a little short still to compare with his webtoon counterpart.

Speaking of the context further, technically I don’t think Suho “stole” the scene. The act, yes, I’ll admit to that, but not the scene, nor the core of what bonded Jugyeong and Seojun together — Suho didn’t have an external group of friends which he brought Jugyeong to meet, and he certainly didn’t share the street-shopping backgrounds and have a comforting meeting place with Jugyeong there.

I would’ve been more upset if Seojun confronted the bullies himself and returned the wallet to Jugyeong in the webtoon, only for Suho to obviously rob this scene from him in the K-Drama, when it was obviously Seojun’s highlighted moment. But as is, it happened differently.

Suho’s acts could held up as his own, especially since, different than the webtoon, he already saw bare-faced Jugyeong and knew the owner of the wallet [as he’s watched the scene unfold], while Seojun happened to find the wallet and Jugyeong thankfully had her ID, the one with make-up on her face, which led to Seojun keeping it and giving it back to her when they bump into each other later.

They weren’t really any confrontations about insecurities, past mistakes or the truth to be had; for Seojun and Jugyeong, that scene was only a “beginning” (the first of many events to come, the trigger point on how the rest starts), while for Suho, it was a “conclusion” (scenes triggered by other events first, ending with a specific decision).

The Spicy Food

Now, this is where I get a bit iffy? I wasn’t happy with it, simply put. I understand they amended it in episode 9, but — it still happened. And hoo-boy, they weren’t sneaky about it at all.

In the webtoon, Episode 33, Seojun invited Jugyeong to eat tteokbokki with him. Jugyeong wasn’t really feeling up to eat, but she accepted because she likes spicy food. Later, while having the meal together, Seojun is obviously having a hard time eating the spicy food, which Jugyeong internally questioned about.

In the K-Drama, Heegyeong and Mr. Han went on a date, and then we later find out that Mr. Han couldn’t withstand spicy food. He didn’t want to return the meal though, thinking that he would’ve burdened the staff.

Again, one can obviously just argue that, it happened in different context too, just like it did in the Wallet Scene. Or, better yet, that it’s fine, since they did include this in episode 9 in the end. But — the reason I had a problem with this choice of writing was because, unlike the other two examples, not beiong able to handle spicy food is a major, if not a constant, Seojun’s characteristics and behaviour.

That’s a Seojun thing, rather than a simple action, and taking that from him, or basing it off of him, feels a little... lazy.

Mr Han in the webtoon, while he didn’t play a major part and Heegyeong eventually lost interest in him, was a messy eater. They could’ve gone with that route easily. That he’s a messy eater, and Heegyeong finds herself liking it anyway — that is, if, like how I’ve been viewing the direction of the show, they really do want them to be together.

That’s already been apart of Mr. Han’s already-established behaviour, why take it from Seojun?

Which led us to the few bits of how Seojun is stolen beyond simple scenes.

Seojun’s Character

Now, “stolen” is such a big word. It’s right, to an extent, but it’s still such a big word. More than that, I’d say it’s “chipped”? As in, the true essence of what made Seojun so remarkable and strong as a second male lead in the webtoon is taken apart to have it lend to other characters or, equally worse, downplayed in the drama.

I’ve always had such a problem and it’s a MAJOR problem when Seojun, in the K-Drama, told Suho, “You don’t deserve to be happy.”

Straight-up, honest to god? That isn’t Seojun at all.

Yes, he’s upset. And yes, he’s irritated by what he perceived as Suho not coming to his expectation when it came to their shared loss regarding Seyeon and/or what he thought Suho failed to do. These are all true. Seojun is angry, and he’s consistently angry at Suho until they reach their resolution together — but he would never wish that on Suho.

What drove his anger was disappointment, was a sense of hopelessness, was the loss, but it never came from hatred. Seojun felt a lot towards Suho, but hate to the point of wishing someone’s unhappiness was never one of them.

Just having that spoken by Seojun contradicted a lot to how he behaves in the webtoon — which was honestly this upstanding, responsible and caring guy. And he is!

And while I adore Suho and he has a special place in my heart, I do see a stark difference to how Seojun operates if we compare to Suho: Seojun’s always been straightforward with his actions, countlessly working hard once he sets his mind to something (either that by choice, or otherwise i.e. helping his mom pay the bills, and then pursuing a career in being an idol) — he’s a go-getter.

Suho isn’t, not so directly at least. He’s quiet, and he keeps things to himself, and he doesn’t like a show. Which was why a lot of him “helping out” Jugyeong — mostly driving off weird men or confronting them — happened behind the scenes and without anybody’s knowledge. He doesn’t even really wanna acknowledge it after.

Seojun’s direction in life is clear, too. He wants to work right after school, and he does. He wants to treat Jugyeong properly as her romantic partner, and he does. He wants to be an idol and succeed, and he works hard on it.

Suho, on the other hand, not so much. A lot of the major things that did happen to Suho, it happened externally. Something else was pushing him to do an action. Him flying out to Japan due to his father, him returning to Korea etc. Again, this is a lot to do with his mental health as well, which is a separate post altogether, but I just wanted to point this out as comparison.

Rambling over — yes, if you’re not an avid webtoon reader, just know that, that specific line from Seojun? He would never. That was already so out-of-character of him because, as I’ve said and I will say it again, whatever anger Seojun harboured for Suho, it never came from such ugly or raw hatred. He didn’t understand Suho’s motivation after and/or during Seyeon’s death, and I do believe he could lash out from that - but he never held any extreme grudges.

To add, in the webtoon, that line was actually spoken by Suho when he admitted to his therapist that he think he doesn’t deserves to be happy.

This is also a big thing in my opinion, because it shows how differently Seojun and Suho coped — either with Seyeon, or whatever that comes after. Seojun has always been more prone to anger while Suho, either that added by his fluctuating mental health or otherwise, is prone to sadness.

Now, these are two extremely big negative emotions to be associated with our ever-favourite boys, but it’s true. It’s consistent throughout their characters all-through the story (in the webtoon, at least). And it does play a role, because, again, it showcases the difference of characters between Seojun and Suho, and how they react to situations differently. Seojun with his quick-temper, and Suho, easily feeling hopeless.

So, why is it important to know this?

Because a lot of Seojun’s anger, a lot of that deep-rooted aggression — that was transferred to Suho in the K-Drama. And no cap? It shouldn’t have.

3. Why It Worked, Why It Will Never

Let’s go back to the broader subject briefly.

At this point of the K-Drama, which is ten episodes in, I felt a little moot comparing scenes specifically to what had happened in the webtoon. It’s always nice, of course, to critically analyse any form of entertainment so we could always better our watching experiences or give the proper feedbacks to the creative industry, and while I like delving in deep too, I also have to remind myself a lot to not .... take it too seriously, essentially.

Because at this point, obviously the K-Drama has adapted many of the plot points from the webtoon, and re-arranged it to fit into what they deemed to be necessary to work in that timeline. And that’s okay!

For example, while Seojun’s scene was borrowed to other characters, we do get the opportunity to see Seojun being presented slightly differently. We have that new arc regarding his mother, and we see a whole loveable cast of group Seojun has acquired during his time schooling, and Seojun gets a ton more interactive chances with Jugyeong to make up for what they couldn’t do — that is, the slow progress of them becoming truly close friends till they’re in their young adult years — and every scene of them could still hold up as a magnifying and incredible moment as its own.

For example, that scene when Seojun took care of a sick Jugyeong in the bus, and he said (although I’m recalling only from memory), “I don’t like it when people get sick.” Which I think was super sweet and super impactful at the same time. This didn’t happen in the webtoon, but in the K-Drama, among the first scenes they’ve introduced Seojun in was when he was in the hospital visiting his mother; we also learn later that he actually time off from school to do help his parent.

So obviously Seojun’s cautious on anything that’s to do with somebody contracting an illness etc — and not only it showed in that one dialogue, it’s made more brilliant when Seojun, who can’t really afford any expensive jewellery, made Jugyeong a flower-braid bracelet. I think that was such a nice contrast, a nice touch and ugh!!!!!

That really punched me straight into my Seojun x Jugyeong heart.

We also see a different way of them interpreting and putting Sujin brilliantly into the story. I really want to go deeper into this, but I don’t believe I have sufficient enough thoughts beyond the fact that I much prefer the way the K-Drama built up Sujin to compare with how the webtoon placed Sujin. She has more motivation, she has more leverage, and last but not least, she has much more flexibility to become a serious second female lead and rival.

I do have a problem with how they decided to go with Suho, because again, I think all of the extra personality traits are not necessary. Suho doesn’t need to be a good fighter like Seojun had been established to be, and he doesn’t need to be musically passionate, like Seyeon was, because his own personality and character should’ve been enough. He could carry that personality well; he doesn’t need to be “more”.

Which brought us to this: Seojun’s aggressiveness taken by Suho.

To make this short - it just doesn’t work. It didn’t... really feel out of character, per se, but I'm not the biggest fan of it. I felt like, personally, the writers sort of missed the point of what truly made Suho Suho — which was this guy who was more prone to melancholy-based emotion than anything else — and, in return, (again, I’ll be using the word) they “chipped” away at Seojun because of it.

So, what should’ve been Seojun’s distinctive reaction carried specifically by his character, it was shared by Suho.

Suho isn’t unpredictable, he isn’t quick-tempered, and he isn’t fast on his feet. These are all Seojun’s major personality traits. He’s opinionated, yes, and he isn’t afraid to set his boundaries — but mostly, only his own. One of the more primary example I could give from the K-Drama that I think sorta worked at first glance, but didn’t really when you think twice about it, in regards to this, was Suho chasing after Seojun and Jugyeong after a gang of people were running towards them. (This is after the karaoke scene.)

Honestly, rather than just wasting his energy, it’d be more appropriate if Suho calls the cop.

Suho’s incredibly logical, and furiously straightforward. He doesn’t precisely need to be running around for — what? What was he achieving anyways in the K-Drama by running after the gang? See how it sorta doesn’t make sense? So, yes, if it doesn’t make sense - Suho wouldn’t. 

Again, this circles back to how the different way the boys coped or react, as I mentioned earlier, and it’s important to be distinctive with these because both boys are two separate individuals with two different ways of seeing the world and taking them in, and, cheesy as I may, representation matters.

And when it isn’t represented properly, and I’ll be repeating this over and over: Seojun’s character seems like it’s “chipped away”. Not stolen, no, because it’s still there but — what should’ve been an emotion his specific character should harbour, it feels ... lacklustre, almost. Like a joke: what makes Seojun’s anger so “special” compared to the obvious internalised rage Suho seems to have [in the K-Drama]?

4. How Is Seojun and Suho Dynamic Ruined?

Simply put: observe the way the writers put Seojun and Suho when it comes to Jugyeong.

In the K-Drama, it’s constant rivalry between the boys ��� driven, of course, by Suho’s possibly deteriorating mental health and the insecurity that came with. But it was also easily flamed by Seojun making jabs and/or crossing the boundaries by being there when he shouldn’t have been.

Now, I’m not into the whole Team Seojun vs. Team Suho thing because the real tea is, that just isn’t Seojun and Suho.

And when the K-Drama writers failed to incorporate how exactly Seojun and Suho had been when both boys clearly shared an affection towards the same person, Jugyeong, I feel like — out of everything, that’s when they lost the biggest essence of what made these two men who they are. 

Because Seojun and Suho? They were mad respectful towards each other.

I think one of the most memorable and important scene, and I carry this in my heart, was when Jugyeong was supposed to go out on that date with Suho, and they promised each other — but then Suho’s father got into an accident, and Jugyeong wasn’t reachable because she broke her phone.

You know who showed up to that date to inform Jugyeong? It was Seojun.

And it was Seojun again who came to pick Jugyeong up and got into the taxi to the airport to see Suho off. Seojun was the one who gave Jugyeong and Suho some time to say goodbye between themselves, tapping Jugyeong on the back when he walks away. That’s how far Seojun really cared for the girl he loves: he was willing to let her love the person she likes.

He was supportive, without being discriminating.

And it was the same again when it’s reversed. During the whole time Seojun and Jugyeong were dating, Suho never once showcased that he was dissatisfied or he wasn’t happy with the development. In fact, again and again, he was supportive. He put in good words for Seojun, he encouraged Jugyeong to always work it out between her and Seojun.

Of course, there are hiccups here and there — but that was the true essence, I believe, of the Seojun-and-Suho dynamic.

Even despite the misunderstanding, even through the romantic interest coming in between them, there will always have this big respect to not go behind one another and put the other down, I think. They would confront, and have their clashing moments face-to-face (but never too aggressively because Suho’s weak and often pulls back lol), but very rarely does it go further than that.

Even when they’re driven with anger, jealousy, or disappointment — you could tell that the bond they’ve shared from their middle school and with Seyeon were always somehow stronger.

And yes, you could argue that maybe, in this point of the K-Drama, they aren’t reconciled yet, which is why they acted the way they did. But I feel like? That didn’t matter? Because, in episode 10, we could clearly see Seojun having the capability of being supportive and putting his good faith in Suho, despite not being on good terms with the guy (e.g. when he advised, “Suho would never do that to you.”) even though that’s quickly tarnished when Seojun, in the same breath, quickly suggest for a break-up.

I don’t really have any defence for Suho because I already felt like him expressing constant aggression towards Seojun is already wrong, misplaced, or poorly written — so whatever action that came after always came a bit off for me. For example, rather than putting the blame for his own jealousy towards Seojun or Jugyeong (i.e. episode eight in its entirety), Suho is the kind of person to blame himself. He would feel that he lacked something, that it was him that wasn’t enough, that it must be him that’s done something to push Jugyeong, or anybody, away.

(Again, echoing his admittance: “I don’t think I deserve to be happy.” or, if we’re going with the K-Drama route, from Seojun’s accusation.)

5. Why They Didn’t Need To Change At All

The worst part of knowing or realising these small details is that, the story could still work. It could still move the characters forward, and have the relatively same outcome i.e. Suho lashing out by the end, threatened by his own insecurity that Jugyeong might prefer Seojun after all etc — but instead, we have these amazing characters that came off at 90% in the drama adaptation, but the 10% that really mattered to their characters weren’t mixed in well enough.

So, the question comes: how exactly should they be acting?

First, Suho’s often more calm — the calmest, in fact, between the Suho-Jugyeong-Seojun trio. This still doesn’t mean he doesn’t have any pent-up guilt, or sadness, or even aggression, but it rarely ever comes out violently. Even if it does, in any shape or form, mostly the emotions are fired back towards himself i.e. experiencing massive self-loathing, self-doubt, which, of course, may in return affect his interpersonal relationships.

Episode 10 played this out nicely, in fact: because we do have a scene where Suho’s being incredibly understanding and respectful in the beginning, but then little things and mistimed events built up (without proper explanations from the other party, to add) and he essentially imploded on himself i.e. lashing out, spiralling, having a mental breakdown, and by the end of it, (trigger warning ahead) committing suicide and/or self-harming himself by walking freely and stopping in the middle of traffic.

Secondly, Seojun could’ve still held so much anger at Suho for what happened with Seyeon and had fallen for Jugyeong all the while, but he could still stay in-character by never explicitly trying to constantly put Suho down. It just goes against a character so substantial for putting his all towards the people he loves, or have loved. And Seojun have loved Suho as a best friend - so for him to act the way he did, to say that line ( “You don’t deserve to be happy” ) especially, that makes me sad.

6. Conclusion

True Beauty, on the surface, will always be a light-hearted romance comedy that honestly has very interesting and well thought-of characters that... don’t necessarily stand out, I don’t think, among other high school K-Drama, but it does represent young adults or teens who seemed to “look like they’re doing well” but a lot of us really aren’t. We’re just figuring things out as we go along, and that’s what Suho, Seojun and Jugyeong seemed to be doing with us: they’re figuring things out as they go along, too.

In the end, there really isn’t much of a point expressing these thoughts except that it gives me simple pleasures, and if it can attract a few people who loves True Beauty too, I would simply die of appreciation. I hope a lot of the K-Drama audience can have a slight knowledge that, yes, Seojun is absolutely super kind, way kinder than he’s been portrayed on screen, and yes, Suho isn’t normally that possessive - protective, yes - he never stalks or particularly demands anything out of Jugyeong though.

Okay, before this got too long again, I thank you for reading!

Feel Free To Ask Me Anything