#I’ll always go crazy over fruit stickers

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #389

“i’m well aware i’m a danger to myself  /  are you aware i’m a danger to others?”

How much do you weigh? Yeah, we're starting off on a bad foot. If you are outside, what are you most likely doing? Putting Roman's used litter in the trash. Do you think you can love someone without trusting them? Hm... I guess you could love them, but it'd be a complicated situation. What’s your opinion on people who go hunting for sport? If it's purely for sport, from the very bottom of my heart, fuck you. Do you have a fairly fast or slow internet connection? I'd say it's decently fast. Have you ever been someplace tropical? Yeah, Florida. My grandma lived there. Are you sensitive to caffeine? No. It does like... nothing to me. How do you usually get around? My mom's car. Have you ever been accused of being too clingy? No actually, but I know I kinda am. What do you think about Kim Kardashian? I don't have an opinion of her. Can you speak any French? No. Favorite yogurt flavor? The only yogurt I've been liking lately is cookies and cream to add a different texture, because otherwise, I don't like its natural texture very much??? Idk man, my taste buds are wild. How much money do you have in your wallet right now? Just like $5. What bottled water brand do you like? Essentia. Your favorite way to eat chocolate? As chocolate bars, probably. How often do you listen to country music? Like, never. Linkin Park or Avenged Sevenfold? Linkin Park. Last surgery you had? Pilonidal cyst removal. Have you ever played guitar? I briefly took classes for it in high school, yes. Best I got to was playing some of the intro to "Crazy Train." I enjoyed it, but not enough to be consistent and really learn. Is there someone in your life whose career/life choices you find immoral/unethical? Have you ever told that person your views? Do you find it difficult to support them (emotionally or otherwise) because of their choices? I don't think so? What trait do you feel you lack that you wish you possessed? Independence and confidence would be nice... Have you ever considered writing your memoirs? No. Do you find it difficult to stay invested in online relationships? God no. I love my online friends. Half of 'em more than "irl" ones. Are you the type of person who pays close attention to the release dates of movies, music, etc., and will, for example, go see a movie or buy an album on the date it is released? If so, when is the last time you did so? I have to be VERY invested in it to care THAT much. It happened most recently when Meerkat Manor: Rise of the Dynasty premiered. Do you have any stickers on your laptop? No. Would you rather have a job for which you had to go in early in the morning or one you had to stay late into the evening at? Early in the morning. I'm in a better mood in the morning. Do you use any apps to track your health or medications? I have a calorie-counting app, as well as one to track my period. Whose opinions/recommendations do you value most? My mom's, best friend's, and psychiatrist's. If you could’ve been at any historical event, which would you have liked to witness firsthand? I don't really know. Maybe the very first Pride event? Is there something that you really want to do but are afraid of doing? If so, why are you afraid of doing it? Ride a rollercoaster, for one. I know I never will, though. I'm too afraid of throwing up, but even more realistically, I fear passing out before of the twisting and turning and just standing up makes me very dizzy. My blood pressure is STUPID low. What is something society “expects” you to do that you don’t want to do and/or don’t plan on doing? Have kids. That's a big 'ole fat no from me. Have Jehovah's Witnesses ever come to your door? Twice at least. Are you well-known by people in your area? No. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? No, thank Christ. It sounds terrifying. What's your favourite type of bird? Barn owls. Melanistic ones, to be exact. Stunning. What tv show(s) have you been watching currently? I'm only keeping up with Meerkat Manor: Rise of the Dynasty. Have you ever dated a smoker? For less than a day. Do you share a middle name with any of your siblings? Yes. Have you ever been a member in a band? No. Besides the school band. Can you cry on command? If so, have you ever used it to your advantage? No. Do you have separate emails for personal and business? No. Have you ever missed a flight? Yes. Have you ever seen a lunar eclipse? Multiple times. Have you ever taken a ride in a convertible? I think once with my brother. Why did you last need to use a band-aid? I'unno. What fruit do you eat most often? Apples. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? My ma. Has someone ever tried to start an argument with you over Facebook? What happened? A few times. I don't feel like thinking over this. Have you ever had an unusual type of milk (eg. oat, rice, almond)? I've tried almond milk, and I hated it. If you could experience life as a Disney princess for a week, which princess would you pick and why? uhhhhhh idk When you’re at home, do you spend most of your time in your room? I'm essentially always in my room. If you like to sleep in late, have your parents ever told you off for doing so? No. Do you find piercings attractive? Yep. Do you like potato chips? Loooove 'em. What’s the most stalker-like/creepy thing you’ve ever done? If you don’t think you’ve done anything like that, what’s the most stalker-like thing someone’s done to you? Nothing beyond checking Jason's Facebook sometimes after the breakup, I think. Even that though I wouldn't recommend doing. You're just going to get yourself hurt. Stay away from exes' profiles. Do you think it’s a double standard that a woman can hit a man and expect to get away with it, but if a man hits a woman it’s assault? Yep. I don't give a fuck what's in your pants, you don't hit anybody unless you're fighting to defend yourself. What’s your favorite old Disney movie and favorite new Disney movie? I mean... define "old." I'll go with The Lion King for old, and for new, uh... Finding Dory, probs. Name something “trendy” or popular that you dislike. I don't really know what IS trendy right now... Is Snapchat still "in?" Because I've never gotten that. “Dirty talk” in the bedroom…love it, like it, don’t care, dislike it, or hate it? I think I'm kinda neutral about it? Like I mean it also depends on exactly what is said. I prefer more loving talk, though. What is/are your favorite type(s) of ethnic food, and what’s your favorite food within that type? I'm a basic fatass that likes American cuisine most, aha... Like give me a cheeseburger and I'm happy lmao. How would you describe your relationship with your hair over the years? I love it more now at a short length than I ever did long. When it was long and I was in my deepest depression, I was awful about brushing it. It would get so knotted. Like looking back, it nearly makes me shiver. I HIGHLY recommend cutting your hair for anyone who struggles with selfcare. How do you feel about your SO daily/regularly checking up on a couple of his exes on social media? I'm single, but hypothetically, if you're checking an ex's page nearly every day, I would not be okay with that. I'm totally fine with exes remaining friends and just cordially talking now and again, but that's it. It's a respect thing. Do you prefer your guy to wear cologne or not? I personally like cologne if it's not overwhelming. I really don't care if you wear it or not, though. Ladies, how important is it to you that your SO wears/would wear a wedding ring? This survey is so heteronormative. But anyway, unless there was an issue like it not fitting, I'd want my spouse to wear their ring. What was the turning point that led you to decide for or against having children? There are a lot of reasons I don't want kids. I'm too selfish with my "me" time, I stress out too easily, I don't want to dedicate my life to keeping another person alive and fed and happy, I have bad genes... I could go on and on. I just wouldn't be a good, "present" enough mom. I am much more interested in ensuring *I* am okay. Is having your “dream” wedding really that important to have? Not at all. I mean I want a smooth and memorable wedding, but I'm not obsessed with it being perfect. Do you consider it cheating if your SO goes to a strip club and then doesn’t tell you? That's certainly not cheating, but I wouldn't like it. Being secretive about anything in a relationship is unhealthy, imo. I'd be hurt and also very insecure because I wouldn't feel like "enough." How old is too old for trick-or-treating? Honestly? I don't think you ever are. Like come on, does it REALLY matter? Let people have fun. I don't do it because of societal standards, but I would if I didn't care about being judged. Do you sleep with your arms over or under the covers? It depends on the temperature, but I normally wake up with them under. Do you own any t-shirts of your favorite band? I have an Ozzy one stored somewhere, but it doesn't fit me now. There was another I really liked too, but that one is WAY too small now. Fries or onion rings? Fries. I'm not a fan of onion rings. True/False: you’ve had an odd dream this week. Story of my life. I had one last night where I kept dying in different ways, and I actually felt the pain, like drowning in magma. Do you find tattoo sleeves attractive? YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Do you like carving pumpkins? Yeah. What’s an animal you want to have as a pet but can’t? My mom has absolutely forbidden me to get a tarantula (uh, many tarantulas in my case) until I move out, lol. That doesn't stop me from checking Craigslist like every day. ;_; Have your parents ever caught you drinking? "Caught," no. Any time I've drunk, I've had permission or was a legal adult by then. How would you react if your celebrity crush came to your door? First be humiliated at my appearance and then absolutely pass out lmao. Has your mom/dad ever walked in on you kissing or anything more with someone? No, thank fuck. The person you have a crush on is drunk and goes to kiss you, you know they don’t realize what they’re doing, but do you kiss anyways? If I know it's something they wouldn't do sober, absolutely not. What would you prefer to get from a guy/girl: flowers, a hand written poem, a picture he drew of you or a nice night out? Any would be lovely, but the poem would appeal most to me because of the amount of thought that goes into poetry. Do you any shirts with any kind of images of food on them? What? I don't think so, no. Which holiday is the most fun to decorate for? Halloween. What was the first website you had an email account on? Yahoo. Have you ever written a fanfic? No. Tattoos or piercings? Both are grand, but tats win. What’s the last gross movie/show/video you saw? I saw this picture of a snake split open that had eaten another snake. Would you rather live in a huuuge house or a little cozy one? Lil cozy one! I don't want more space than is needed for cleaning reasons, as well as price. Do you have a tutor for anything? No. Who’s the best kisser you know? Jason was. Has anyone ever threatened you with a knife? No. I'd like it to stay that way. (If you’re a girl) Has anyone ever called you "shortie" instead of girl? Ew, no. Do you have a deep voice? For a woman, yes. Do you play games with boys/girls, like 'hard to get’? Hi, I'm an adult. Is there a Sonic where you live? YES. It's my fave fast-food place. What do you like on your pizza? I have three go-tos depending on my mood: Pepperoni, jalapenos, or meat lovers.

[bobasheebaby]

200 Brooklyn 99 Prompts

Rosa

1 “Talk to him, that's what friends do.” “Nope. I'm gonna wait 'til I'm on my deathbed, get in the last word and then die immediately.” “That's your plan for dealing with this?” “That's my plan for dealing with everything. I have seventy-seven arguments I'm going to win that way.”

2 “I'm already seeing somebody, NAME.” “Oh, and just like that, things got interesting.” “And just like that, I left.”

3 “NAME is even wearing his/her formal leather jacket.” “It's the one without any blood on it.”

4 “Right, that's the guy/girl you said the lame stuff about. Like he’s/she's a good listener.” “Sorry, what do you look for in a guy/girl?” “Real stuff, like the shape of his/her ass.”

5 “Sorry I'm late. I had to go back to the deli and return my Everything Bagel. In what world does everything not include beef jerky?” “All of them.”

6 “He/She also likes to look up recipes online and go, "Who's got the time?"

7 “Thank you, NAME. Your entire life is garbage.”

8 “NAME , tell us about your family.” “I have one.”

9 “Anyone over the age of six celebrating a birthday should go to hell.”

10 “I am dating his/her nephew/niece. Now we are hanging out on weekends. What is next? Oh! Small talk.”

11 “Wait, is that a smile I see?” “Possibly. My immune system is too weak to fight off my smile muscles.”

12 “Whoa, what happened? You know what, forget it. I'll just read NAME’s notes.”

13 “NAME? Are you stuck in there?” “No, I'm in here by choice.” “Oh, 'cause I hear some banging noises as if someone was struggling to open the door.” “No. That was the pipes.” “Or, is it the sound of you learning how to ask for help? You know, you can't spell ‘independent’ without ‘dependent.’” “And you can't spell ‘Go [bleep] yourself’ without ‘[bleep] you.’”

14 “I've said "excuse me" more times this morning than I have in my entire life. Twice!”

15 “Oh, nothing better after a long shift than coming to BAR NAME. It's like Cheers, where everybody knows your name.” “A place where everybody knows your name is hell. You're describing hell.”

16 “So, what is this? Casual, serious? I need to know how to make fun of you.”

17 “NAME and I broke up. He/She ate soup too much.” “What, like every day?” “It happened twice.”

18 “So, what are you drinking?” “I'll have a margarita. But, like, a skinny margarita. So, like, tequila, lime, and a tiny splash of agave.” “Mm. I refuse to order that.”

19 “What are you looking all wistful about?” “Just thinking, about relationships and love, and how I'm way better at them than I thought I'd be. Should I do a TED Talk on it?” “Doesn't seem any dumber than all the other TED Talks.”

20 “Why didn't you tell me? I had no idea things were getting that serious.” “Yeah, it's very embarrassing having feelings.”

21 “So are you bringing someone to the wedding?” “No, I'm taking a break from dating for a while.” “What?” “I'm sick of asking people how many siblings they have. Oh, is it somewhere between zero and two? How fascinating.”

22 “I grew a goatee and it looks amazing, and I know you can see it.” “Of course we can see it, NAME. It's horrible.”

23 “It feels like you're being a little harsh.” “Thanks, good note. I was going for extremely harsh. I'll turn it up.”

24 “Are your senses heightened?” “I think I might be pregnant, not bitten by a radioactive spider.”

25 “You're what sneezes are!”

26 “Seriously, you guys should stand up once in a while. You know, for your hearts.”

27 “NAME, this is dumb. I'm just gonna go.” “No, no, no. You promised me more time. I still have seven minutes.” “I really don't want to miss my flight, and I cannot physically stand the way that room smells anymore.” “Just breathe through your mouth.”

28 “You know, some people say, ‘Mo money, mo problems,’ but those people are idiots. Money's amazing.”

29 “Dude, just admit you ruined everything and turned our lives into a living hell. No biggie.”

30 “We don't want anyone getting alcohol poisoning, so if you throw up, you're disqualified.” “I never throw up. I just tell my stomach to deal with it. My body is terrified of me.”

Jake

31 “I also have a hairline fracture in my thumb. Mankind's least important finger, am I right?”

32 “I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.”

33 “How much could I possibly owe you? Fifty, sixty bucks?” “Two thousand, four hundred and thirty seven dollars.” “Dollars?! Wait, of course dollars. Why was that the part I was surprised by?”

34 “So, I'm going to grab a healthy breakfast.” “Are those gummy bears wrapped in a fruit roll-up?” “Breakfast burrito, but yeah.” “I pity your dentist.” “Joke's on you. I don't have a dentist.”

35 “I'm talking to my credit card company. I tried to get an online subscription to the New Yorker and they declined me. Apparently, based on my previous purchases, they assumed it was fraud. That's crazy. I'm fancy. One time I had coffee-flavored ice cream.”

36 “Rules are made to be broken.” “They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.” “Uh, piñatas.” “Glow sticks.” “Karate boards.” “Spaghetti when you have a small pot.” “Rules.”

37 “Hey, can I ask you something?” “Mm-hmm.” “If the toilets drain into the ocean, does that mean a tiny shark could swim up and bite me in the butt?” “No, not at all.” “Psh, lame.”

38 “NAME, super important question. Which one of these shirts should I wear to dinner with your dad/mom tonight?” “Those are exactly the same.” “I have a signature look, NAME.”

39 “Hello, good sir, I'd like your finest bottle of wine, please.” “That will be $1,600.” “Great, I'd like your $8-est bottle of wine, please.”

40 “I am straight-up depressed. NAME’s been doing her best to cheer me up. He/She gave me this sticker this morning just for waking up.” “Ew, it's like you're dating your teacher.” “I know, it's so hot.”

41 “Wait. Before you say anything, I want to guess what happened based on your face. Someone died. No! You won a prize. I'm not getting better at this.”

42 “What is the bandwidth on the wifi here? We have much content to stream.”

43 “Oh, you sweaty, chair-spinning morons. You're gonna get us out of here.”

44 “Sir, I think I speak for all of us when —“ “He/She doesn't.” “He/She doesn't.”

45 “So, your brother/sister's a bit of a nightmare.” “I wouldn't say that. I mean, at most, he’s/she's a daymare.” “Those are so much scarier.” “Yeah.”

46 “Look, NAME, I burnt two hundred calories.” “That's your heart rate.” “Yeah, that checks out.”

47 “I don't slump, people. I opposite of slump. I pmuls. That's slump backwards and it's what I do. I pmuls all over this bitch.”

48 “Excuse me. We were just looking for a place to —“ “Boink.” “Yes, boink. That's my preferred term for it, too.”

49 “Thank you for doing this. I love you.” “Noice. Smort. I love you too.”

50 “Adult parties? I believe they're called orgies.”

51 “I have a sexy voice!

Champagne.

Mountain range.

Hugs.”

52 “Has anyone ever told you you look just like a statue?” “Yes.”

53 “NAME, you're smiling. It's very weird. Like seeing a turtle out of its shell.”

54 “You look happy. Let me guess. Your egg sandwich fell on the floor, and they gave it to you for free.” “No. Can you do that? Why doesn't everyone just drop their sandwiches on the floor?” “I was trying to insult you.” “And instead you gave me an amazing life hack!”

55 “So, we gonna talk about what happened back there? I haven't seen someone cry that much since NAME heard they were remaking ‘First Wives Club.’”

56 “Hey, there, NAME. Everything okay?” “No, I'm having a meltdown.” “Props. That was amazing.” “Thanks. It was a lot of work.”

57 “Almost makes me wanna take things seriously all the time. But then I'm like ‘boobs, farts, boobs, whatever’.”

58 “Ahh, babe, this is so nice. There are hot stones on our butts for no reason.” “Not on mine. My butt stones keep falling off, because I'm so tense about NAME being here and ruining everything.”

59 “Okay, don't shoot! That's how people get shot.”

60 “Rule number 3: Let's not have sex right away.” “Cool. Cool cool cool cool cool. No doubt, no doubt, no doubt. Good rule. No sex. Good rule.”

Charles

61 “Okay, but I thought since you were in charge, maybe I could be your right hand man? Your Tinker Bell?” “Tinker Bell?” “Let me tell you something about Tinker Bell. Tinker Bell is a loyal lieutenant and a real thorn in the side of Captain Hook.”

62 “NAME, why don't you show Danger what a fax machine is.” “Okay. Imagine a letter had unprotected sex with a phone.”

63 “Hey, NAME, are you ready to go streaking?” “What?” “That's what my dad/mom and I called getting blonde streaks in your hair. We used to do it to our ponytails on road trips. You just take a little lemon up top, and let the sun do the rest. We called it giving each other road head.” “You just said you called it going streaking.” “It had a couple names.”

64 “So we have good news, and we have bad news.” “My Nana always said, ‘Bad news first because the good news is probably a lie.’ Fun fact: she made me cry a lot.”

65 “What about me? What if something happens to NAME, and he never gets to meet my baby? I don't want to hang out with some stupid baby who's never met NAME.”

66 “Oh, you're right. I'm gonna tell him/her. It might not be today. It might not be tomorrow. It definitely won't be later than tomorrow. So pretty much today or tomorrow then.”

67 “No! I was eavesdropping. I'm always eavesdropping.” “I don't like it.” “Look, I didn't spend the last seven years watching your love ripen, only to have it sullied by a city hall wedding. You're getting married right here, right now.”

68 “I know you think my judgement's clouded because I like him/her a little bit.” “You doodled your wedding invitation.” “No, that's our joint tombstone.” “My mistake.”

69 “How many times have I smacked you in your face?” “Lost count.” “And you still have no fear of me.” “I'm trying to read your womb vibe.” “Exactly. Knock it off.”

70 “Okay, first of all, NAME, you look amazing. Secondly, I made an appointment at the salon with Nikki, for you, under the name Gabriella Fuentes de San Miguel Estrada. I had fun with the name.” “Clearly.”

71 “He’s/She's got a type, which is really any one but you.” “Yeah, that was my ex-husband/ex-wife's type, too.”

72 “Sexy train is leaving the station. Check out this caboose. Later, sluts.”

73 “I can't wait to see you, my luscious little breakfast quiche. I just want to draw you a bubble bath and spoon-feed you caviar. I think we should open up a joint checking account. I love you. [pause] What am I doing?” “It's okay. I hung up right after ‘Chucklebunny’.” “Help me. I've gone Full NAME.”

74 “Do you desire a crispen potato?” “Oh, don't mind if I do-ble. Wait a minute. Crispen potato. Why are you fancy talking.” “How dare you, sir/madam. I speak the common tongue.” “There it is again. You only do that when you're lying or hiding something.” “Hiding? Ha. Pish-posh.”

75 “Hey, donut holes. Don't mind if I do. Eurgh! Fish? Fish donuts, NAME? What is wrong with you?” “It's takoyaki. I'm drowning my sorrows in octopus balls.”

76 “Put on a T-shirt for all I care. It doesn't matter what you wear.” “Of course it matters. He has to wear the smaller checks. Big checks wash him out. Where are you, NAME?”

77 “Ooh, if they have your phone, we can track where they're going. I have ‘Find My Phone’ set up to track you. What? I do that for all my friends, not just you.” “Show me.” “There's no time!”

78 “You okay?” “Yeah, no burns. The doctor said I was lucky my body was so damp.”

79 “You guys have been down here for two hours. What, did you have sex forty times?”

80 “What? You don't need closet space. You have, like, one outfit.”

81 “You just graduated pie school, bitches. [pause] Sorry I said bitches, I'm just really worked up.”

82 “So, I know you're NAME’s best friend, and —“ “Did he/she say that? Did you get that on tape?” “No.” “No, he/she didn't say that or no, you didn't get it on tape? Doesn't matter. Either way, you screwed up big time.”

83 “What you did is the culinary equivalent of unprotected sex.”

84 “That's right. Boom. Just kicked Santa in the testicles.”

85 “No, there's no one in my life. [wink] Sort of a sad thing to wink about, I realize now.”

86 “NAME! Were you dreaming about NAME again?” “Why did you wake me up?! I told you never to wake me up!”

87 “You used all the touching time, NAME. I get 100% of the goodbye touching time. 100%.”

88 “Do you wanna know why he/she went out with him/her and not you?” “Yeah.” “Because he/she actually asked him/her out.”

89 “NAME, will you taste this batter?” “Mm-hmm. Hmm. I think it's a little off.” “You know what's off? Your mouth! Why NAME lets your stupid tongue anywhere near him/her I'll never know. Nope, I forgot the sugar. That's on me.”

90 “There's no need for NAME to see me unleash the beast.”

Captain Holt

91 “Look at you. Always working. What happened to my fun big/little brother/sister?” “Fun? I was never fun. You take that back.”

92 “It's the most fun day of the year. Something you wouldn't understand because you're not programmed to feel joy.” “Yes, but my software is due for an exuberance upgrade.”

93 “Sticks and stones, NAME.” “Describing your breakfast?”

94 “NAME, how are you feeling?” “Better today. I even managed to eat some plain toast this morning.” “Smart. Something bland.” “That's my favorite breakfast.”

95 “Joining us for lunch, Sir?” “Oh, no, I've already consumed the required calories for this day period.” “Yummy.”

96 “You all right, NAME? Tough weekend?” “I went to Barbados with my husband/wife. We wove hats out of palm fronds and swam with the stingrays. I've never been happier.”

97 “Maybe I should wing it. Love, it sustains you. It's like oatmeal.” “Okay. Okay. Not bad for winging it.” “I lied. Took me two hours to write that.”

98 “I do not have a problem. If I want to play Kwazy Cupcakes, I will play Kwazy Cupcakes. Kwazy is a difficult word to say in anger, but I think I've made my feelings clear.”

99 “This place is so romantic.” “Yeah, and so intimate.” “Don't worry. I'm not listening to you. I'm just thinking about how this sea bass is cold but not as cold and cruel as the hands of fate that have thrust my entire life into darkness.” “Ah, damn it. I just ordered the sea bass.”

100 “Yeah, and your new shirt is very aggressive and confusing. Is the pineapple the slut, or is it calling someone else a slut?” “Clearly the pineapple is the slut.” “Huh.”

101 “Oh, I've caused a problem. I think I am getting a text message. Bloop. Ah, there it is.”

102 “So nice of you to greet us, NAME. I thought surely you'd still be crushed under that house in Munchkinland.”

103 “So, do you NAME --“ “Yes.” “And do you --“ “Yes. Yes. We do. We're married.”

104 “I mean, don't people call you NAME?” “How dare you.”

105 “So you lied to me? Out of pity. You pity me.” “I wouldn't put it that way.” “I would. I am offended. I am angry. I am very tired. So I'm gonna take a nap, but when I wake up, oh, you are in for it.”

106 “Look at that. You've helped me find my smile.”

107 “Huh. Meat from the street. Sounds like a fun treat. Hah. I'm a poet and ... I didn't even know I was rhyming those words. But it happened anyway.”

108 “Oh, look at that. An alert. I'm probably trending already. What? My account has been deactivated?” “Twitter thinks you're a bot.” “Why? I am a human. I am a human male/female.”

109 “Care to sit? I'm sure you'd like to take some weight off your cloven hooves.” “Call me the devil, NAME? How original.” “Actually, I was calling you a goat. You goat.”

110 “NAME! I'm coming with you.” “Thank you, NAME.” “I'm also coming.” “Not necessary.”

111 “Spot checks are done. Needless to say I'm thoroughly underwhelmed.” “Huh. From your expression, I would have guessed constipated. Or chilly.”

112 “NAME, you have a pretty low bar for what you consider drama. Once, I used an exclamation point in a email. You called me Diana Ross.” “I assure you, in this case, I do not exaggerate.”

113 “I know they say it's not good to have a TV in the bedroom. Which is why I don't.”

114 “NAME, did you just laugh?” “Uproariously.”

115 “You know when you play along with the robot jokes, it kinda ruins my enjoyment of them?” “Yes, I know.”

116 “And what do you hope to get out of this, NAME? Let me guess revenge on Dorothy for killing your sister?”

117 “It was a good game though for a dumbass.” Okay, you're kinda overusing that one. Maybe switch it up a little bit.” “Oh, good note. You dick.” “That landed good.”

118 “Dancing over. Situation defused.” “No!”

119 “All right, NAME, I'm sick of you wasting time. So, yes, I spilled some minestrone on my pants and I'm sitting in my underwear. Happy?”

120 “You found me. Drinking seltzer in the shadows.”

Gina

121 “It's a sloppy Jessica. Mac n cheese, chili, pizza on a bun. Its everything I've wanted to eat for the last 48 hours.” “What happened? I thought you were gonna 'last forever bitches.'” “Turns out I gave up easy. You hear that bitches? I gave up so easy.”

122 “If NAME had a twin, he/she would have eaten him/her in the womb.”

123 “Wait a minute, I think I just figured something out. I got to go.” “Aren't you forgetting something?” [person a gives Person b a kiss on the forehead] “Uh no, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?”

124 “The English language can not fully capture the depth and complexity of my thoughts. So I'm incorporating Emoji into my speech to better express myself. Winky face.”

125 “All right, gang. Diet day 4. How's everyone holding up?” “Honestly, I'm going to last forever. You hear that bitches? I'm gonna last forever.”

126 “If I die, turn my tweets into a book!”

127 “The only reason I didn't tell you is I don't value you as people, so why be honest?”

128 “Breakups are a cartoony thumbs down. They make people feel face-with-Xs-for-the-eyes.”

129 “I'm sorry. I just don't think this is something you're good at.” “What? The only thing I'm not good at is modesty, because I'm great at it.”

130 “Click. I just captured the exact moment you realized you had failed. I guess we all got something out of this.”

131 “It's so addictive, right? I play so much that when I close my eyes at night, I just see cupcakes instead of my normal dizzying array of flashing lights.”

132 “Forget your ex with meaningless sex. It rhymes because it's true.”

133 “NAME. NAME. NAME, I screwed up, big time.” “NAME, given your daily life experiences, you're gonna have to be more specific.”

134 “So, talk to me, goose. How are we looking?” “Sexy, but not like we're trying too hard. Like, sure, we're trying, but it's almost effortless.”

135 “Give me the ring.” “You sound like Gollum.” “That means nothing to me. I don't see those movies, I'm too pretty.”

136 “Oh no, six drink NAME isn't fun. He’s/She's just sad. Damn it!”

137 “I never have second thoughts. That's the luxury of having great first thoughts.”

138 “Ugh, constantly getting NAME’s approval is the worst.” “Yes. I can only imagine.”

139 “You think you can just bully people, but you can't. It's not okay. I'm the bully around here. Ask anyone.”

140 “This just might work out after all.” “You're damn right it will, 'cause we're a ragtag, scrappity, fart-dumb, moron parade, smart-ass team!”

141 “Okay, NAME, stop freaking out. I have the day off. I can step in and help.” “Yeah, me too. I'm not off, but I come and go as I please. It's part of my charm. I'm like an outdoor cat.”

142 “Gina, please keep an eye on NAME today. He's/She’s gonna say something to the wrong person and get himself/herself punched.” “Sure, I'd love to see NAME get punched.” “Try again.” “I will stop NAME from getting punched.” “Correct.”

143 “Oh, I want him/her out. But I'm too scared to tell him/her. “ “All right, listen. I know that your spirit animal is a caterpillar that's been stepped on —“ “Mm-hmm.”

144 “What are you creeps doing? You made me look away from my phone. You better pray I didn't miss a text.” “In the two seconds you looked away?” “Seventeen texts. All of them important.”

145 “What is my favorite soup?” “Chicken noodle.” “Potato leek.” “Corn frickin' noodle. I mean, chowder, damn it.” “You're all wrong. I've never had soup.” “Don't bother. They all suck.”

146 “Okay, so that plumber was useless. But we are two smart and capable people who can definitely figure out how to fix a toilet.” “Of course we can. The internet will tell us what to do. She always does.”

147 “It's crazy how much he/she flirts with me.”

148 “Good morning.” “For whom?” “For you-m.”

149 “So he/she didn't say what happened, which can only mean one thing.” “He's/She’s in a fight club.”

150 “What's up? How can I help?” “Well, when I was a kid, I invented a magnetic flashlight clip so I could read under the covers. This clip and I went all around the world together the Shire, Sweet Valley High, Terabithia.” “But never to a friend's house, huh?” “Uncalled for.”

Amy

151 “That stuff with us is in the past. We talked about that.” “I know, but that was before you saw me in this dope ass tux. I mean you must be freaking out.” “Oh, I really am. I'm really into rented clothes. I love how many butts have been in them.”

152 “You know, we're birds of a feather, you and I.” “I hate cliches.” “Cliches are the worst.”

153 “And now I don't know what to do.” “I think you do know what to do.” “Thanks, NAME.” [leaves the room] “I have no idea what he’s/she's gonna do but that's the safest way to give NAME advice.” “Yep.”

154 “Insult me all you want, for I have only this to say —“ “Victory shall be mine!” “I heard you practicing in the shower. You can't surprise me. Letting me into your life was the worst mistake you ever made.” “Cool, fun take on our relationship.”

155 “NAME, where you at?” “Four drinks.” “What's four-drink NAME again?” “Why don't you come over here and find out?” “Right, Horny NAME”

156 “I'm sorry. We only excluded you because you're kind of an over-texter.” “Over-texter? That's not even a thing.” “Oh really? So you don't remember the time you sent 97 unanswered texts in a five-minute span?” “My phone vibrated itself off the desk. I think it was committing suicide.”

157 “What the hell? I used NAME's exact recipe. I know I'm not a great cook, but I love following instructions.”

158 “What's going on? Is this a dream? No, I'm not holding a label maker.”

159 “My power went out last night and my alarm didn't go off.” “Your alarm is power dependent? You brought this on yourself, son.”

160 “I'd also like to apologize for my friend. His /Her parents didn't give him/her enough attention.”

161 “I'm in! A bet which improves someone's manners? Double score.”

162 “He’s/She's scared.” “He’s/She's not scared. With all due respect, NAME, NAME has no feelings.”

163 “I'm so cold even my fiery dance moves aren't keeping me warm.”

164 “I'm sorry. I tried to be myself and they hated it.”

165 “All right, someone's gotta go out there and kill that feathery bastard. NAME, you're always looking for an excuse to behead something.”

Sergeant Jeffords

166 “It was like taking candy from a baby.” “Why are you giving candy to a baby in the first place? Don't give candy to a baby! They can't brush their teeth!”

167 “I was raised on disco. Little NAME loved to hustle.”

168 “Or is your favorite artist really Taylor Swift?” [Scoffs] “No.” “Lie.” “All right, fine, she is. She makes me feel things.” “She makes all of us feel things!”

169 “Urgh, what's in these?” “Potatoes, butter, a little milk. Oh, and I ran out of salt, so I used baking soda.” “Why wouldn't you? They're both white powders. Of course they're interchangeable.” “Yeah.”

170 “I warned you against using donuts. They're my trigger food.”

171 “Hey, NAME, you know how you're really good at doodling?” “I know you think you're complimenting me, but calling them doodles is an insult. You a big fan of Picasso's doodles?”

172 “Your tone's braggy but your words are real sad.”

173 “See, NAME? Tough love works.” “Damn it! NAME proved the wrong point.”

174 “Now, be respectful and grieve your asses off.” “I don't know why this is happening.” “NAME, I love it. Everyone follow his/her lead!”

175 “Everything's spoiled. My lunch is ruined. My chicken, my potatoes, pasta, my meatballs, ham, my yogurt.” “Wow, that's a lot of yogurt.” “I love yogurt.”

176 “Kind of seemed like you were gonna get up and leave after saying all that.” “I was, but I think I hear NAME.”

177 “You better look cute in this picture, or no one's gonna want you. Do something with your damn paws!”

178 “My tolerance has really changed since I had kids!”

179 “I'm hungry!” “Oh, you're in luck; the fanny pack is filled with granola.” “Mmm! Loose granola.” “I don't want fanny granola! I want steaks and whiskey!”

180 “You probably can't tell, but I'm flexing my brain like crazy right now.”

181 “What's that smell? That's lavender. NAME loves lavender.”

182 “Okay. Excuse me. Can we please eat? My body is starting to digest itself. NAME needs nutrients!”

183 “Don't look at me. NAME wastes all that time building muscles, make him do it.” “Oh, come on, you all know these are just for show.”

184 “Sorry? You bumbling son of a bitch. You just ruined my life. I hope you get hit by a truck and a dog takes a dump on your face.” “Nothing to see here. Just a little hypoglycaemic rage. Move along.”

185 “I feel like a proud mama hen whose baby chicks have learned to fly!”

Hitchcock

186 “NAME, why do you have your shirt off?” “Can't spill food on your shirt if you're not wearing one.”

187 “What bet? What are you guys talking about?” “Seriously? The bet? They've been keeping score all year. It comes up all the time. What are you doing all day?!” “Nothing. Why, you want to hang out?”

188 “So you just want us to lie on the ground and do nothing like a bunch of losers?” “Yes, precisely.” “No!” “Jackpot!”

189 “I don't like it. Something stinks.” “Well, I'm sorry, but I refuse to mask my natural musk with a bunch of chemicals.”

190 “My God. NAME, are you the only person still making sense?” “Yeah. It's bad.”

191 “All right, food is ready, decorations are set, guests should start arriving any moment, and the chairs are still perfection.” “He/She said they're perfection. I'm so proud of you, buddy.” “It was you. You made this happen.”

192 “Who do you think it's gonna be?” “I've no idea.” “I bet it's me. I just hope I'm ready.”

193 “Okay, look, this was maybe a weird way to start the night, but the good news is, we can still make our dinner reservation and no one got hurt.” “Actually, I cut myself real bad.” “Of course you did.”

Scully

194 “Oh, so your plan is to not take this seriously at all?” “Oh, I am as serious as a heart attack. No offense, NAME.” “Nah. Mine are never that serious. I call 'em ‘oopsies’.”

195 “I miss my home chair.” “You miss a chair?”

196 “Are those thumbtacks? What the hell, NAME?” “I thought they'd make good confetti.” “Why?”

197 “All right, anyone else have questions? NAME, NAME, you've been weirdly silent.” “We didn't want to say anything that would get us uninvited.”

198 “Okay, first of all, I want to say that this was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make. There is so much talent in this room.” “Just tell us, bitch. Act as if you already have the role.”

199 “I'll be back. Don't move.” “Not a problem. I hate moving.”

200 “Where should we begin? Do you have any experience with puzzles?” “Yes. I've never solved one.”

[purplesurveys]

868

Favorite beverage: Just your good ol’ cold water. If I wanna treat myself I’ll get milk tea. When was the last time you had ketchup? Ooh I don’t remember...it would probably be 3-4 weeks ago. Or whenever the last time we had lumpia was, because I like drowning that shit in ketchup. Have you ever had a red hotdog? Yeah frozen hotdogs is a favorite snack here and they’re usually red. We usually have them for breakfast, it’s served in parties, it’s in every school caf, etc. What is the most recent gift you've been given? So my uncle has his budding cooking business and sells different dishes everyday. His most recent bestseller is burnt basque cheesecake and while I’ve always wanted my own because it looks SO good, I just haven’t had the money to allot for it. I was really surprised when my grandma called me up today and told me she had ordered an entire cake for me as a graduation gift :) I asked my dad to pick it up from her place this afternoon and it’s crazy delicious.

Is what you're wearing comfortable? Yeup, now that it’s cooler. I sweated through my top when it was hot earlier though, and that wasn’t a comfortable situation at. all.

Did you leave the house today? Nah. I did step out to help my dad with the groceries, but that was it for today’s adventure. Are there bumper stickers on your car? No. If I wanna put stickers on my car I would rather have them on my rear window, and not directly on my car. Are you watching tv right now? What? The dining room TV is turned on but I’m not watching; my dad likes to have it on to listen to the evening news while he cooks dinner. Are you wearing anything blue? Nope, it’s all black for me today. Do you have a job? Not yet. Is your car messy? No. There’s really no reason for it to be, I’ve only driven out once since March. When did you last have whipped cream? I...can’t recall, actually. We don’t have whipped cream at home and I don’t think I ever ordered anything with whipped cream on it shortly before lockdown. How far away is the closest house? 10-20 steps away, depending on how big your stride is. What street do you live on? I’m not dropping that on here. The most I’ll tell you is that our streets are named after tropical cities, haha.

What is your favorite flavor of smoothie? Used to not like smoothies 100% because of the presence of fruits in them, but thanks to my friends Apple and Ed introducing me to Go Salads I’ve come to really like their Breakfast Smoothie – which, after looking up their menu just now, has apple, banana, cinnamon, oats, coco sugar, chia seeds, greens, and soy milk. Are you dating anyone? Yes ma’am. What color is you computer? Silver. Do you own an iPod? What color is it? Technically I still do but only because I haven’t thrown it out. It’s a blue iPod Nano. What is the most recent picture on your phone/camera of: A photo of the aforementioned burnt basque cheesecake. I was planning to post a Facebook status to promote my tito’s business and show my support, so I asked my sister to take a few aesthetic shots of the cake for my post to look presentable. Have you ever shot a gun? No. I’ve shot a fake one that belonged to Athenna’s dad, which he used for like target practice or something. What temperature is it? 31C.

Do you know anyone with a third nipple? No but Harry Styles has four, HAHAHA. There’s your random fact for the day. What do your parents do for a living? My dad’s an executive sous chef and my mom’s a secretary in her specific department in the hotel she works in. Both have always been in the hotel and restaurant industry. Have you ever had a pet that had babies? No. We’ve avoided female dogs because we know we’re not capable of caring for newborn puppies, so instead of potentially being reckless owners we’ve just not had female pets altogether. Which grocery store is closest to you? A local mall chain that has their own grocery, SM. Do you have a hamper in your room? Nah, my parents prefer a general hamper in the bathroom. Do you know anyone that's a nurse? Yes, I have several aunts and as far as I know, one cousin :) I feel really bad for them especially in these times, but they’re such strong people and they just keep powering through and powering through. Do you know someone with the name Alaina? Not that I can recall. What color is the blanket on your bed? Off-white. What are your parent's middle names? No thank you. Have you ever broken a bone? Never. Do you wear braces or glasses? I wore braces in high school, and I’ve had glasses since Grade 5. What color are they? I picked a different color for my braces for every monthly visit cause it made me feel quirkly; my glasses’ frame is dark brown. Are you currently reading a book? Not currently, no. When did you last get your blood drawn? Ughhhhh, cringed reading this haha. Last May when I needed to get a blood test done. Have you ever done hard drugs? Nopes. How many contacts are in your phone? I just know I have a lot, but Apple doesn’t tell you exactly how many and I don’t feel like counting all of them right now. Does your toilet have a seat cover? It has a lid cover, but not a seat cover. What's currently on your grocery list? My dad did the groceries today so we’re pretty stocked rn. What things do you take with you everywhere? My glasses, car and house keys, phone, wallet. Do you know someone that is/was over 100 years old? Gab’s great-grandma was like 106 or 107 by the time she passed. Was your HS principal a girl or a boy? Girl. I went to an all-girls school so it would honestly be a little peculiar if we had a male principal. Have you ever eaten a raw egg? Nah. I wanna try it out though, just for funsies. Do you own any rings? Gab got me this cheap ring for the shits and giggles, but I stopped wearing it when it started turning pink and smelling weird. So no.

If you were to get a new puppy what would you name her? We did get a new puppy! ;) But should we get another, the name will depend on the puppy’s attitude and overall vibe. That’s what we did with Cooper, who was named after Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory because he had been a smartass from the very first minute we played with him. Have you eaten fruit today? No. What about milk? Even more nope haha. I can’t have it all the time. What letter does your state start with? We don’t have states. My province starts with the letter R. Could you list all 50 states? I’ve listed them down on countlesssssss occasions but I always only come up with 35-45 states. I’ve observed that the ones I always forget about are the states in the middle of the map/country-ish states hahaha. What about their capitals? I know a good number of the states’ capitals, but I’ll still undoubtedly do worse. What internet browser do you use? I’ve been on Chrome for the longest time. Do you know anyone that lives in Wyoming? I don’t think so. Do you smoke cigarettes? Yes, starting this year lol. Which person you know has the most unique name? I’m sure I know more unique ones out there but the first names that came to mind are friends of mine named Bernadean, Jeuel (pronounced Jay-well), and Jabes. Oh and I also have an aunt named Marheedoll. Do you know someone that's missing a limb? I don’t think so, no. Do you have facial hair? I do not. Are you a bad person? Not when it comes down to it. I have my petty moments though. What was the last swear you said? I almost yelled the word puta in front of my dad earlier, but I slurred the word and made random noises to avoid saying the full thing haha so it kinda went like puuuuutehshahjskhf. Have you ever called the police on someone? No. What is the most amount of pets you've had at one time? Three – one dog and two birds. When did you last check your email? Last night. I wanted to check if I received any email from the college. Have you ever had a 3rd degree burn? Nope and that sounds so painful, I never want to sustain one. Have you ever ridden in an ambulance? I haven’t. How long is your hair? Right now it reaches only my collarbones. I had it cut fairly recently, so it’s still on the shorter side. Do you lock your doors at night? The doors on the first floor. Does your bedroom have a lock? It does but my mom is such a big sissy about locks and says that “there’s nothing to hide/be private about” since we’re all relatives. She really shouldn’t have gotten a lock for my room if I wasn’t allowed to use it anyway... What do you have at your bedside? I have a rattan trunk that stores all my childhood knickknacks like board games and encyclopedias; then on the other side is a drawer with my home clothes and other knickknacks on the lower drawers. I got some hoarding tendencies from my grandma, so a lot of the stuff I keep in the drawer really has no reason behind my keeping them until today. How big is your bed? Not big at all, it’s just twin-sized. I am so investing on a big-ass bed when I have my own place. Do you know someone that was murdered? I didn’t know her personally but an alumna from my old school got stabbed to death. I don’t know the details but I think she got stabbed because she had gadgets on her, which makes you an easy target for criminals here. The only reason I know her is because my school would do tributes for her from time to time, so I really can’t tell you anything more other than she was stabbed. Do you know someone who's pregnant? I don’t think so. Do you wear a watch? Used to, but I kept losing them. What was your first pet? A pair of goldfish. How much jewelry do you own? Not a lot. The ones I do wear are technically my mom’s too; she just likes sharing them with me. What is the closest purple thing? Probably the ube halaya in the fridge. Green? A piece of Cooper’s toy. What time is it? It isssss 8:43 PM. What is your ideal profession? Lawyer. How tall are you? A little over 5 feet. Have you ever gotten x-rays? Probably once when I was a kid, then around two or three times before I started college. Do you wear gloves in the winter? I imagine I would but we don’t get winter. Do you consider yourself smart? Academic-wise, yep. I’m good at tests and memorizing and I generally enjoy reading educational content. Are you good at algebra? Yeah but I wanna keep it at algebra and geometry lol, I don’t have the patience for calculus and trig. What color eyes are the prettiest? I’ve always loved green/olive green eyes. Are your teeth straight? One of my front teeth protrudes a bit, but that’s all my fault because I lost my retainers back when I still had to use them. My teeth are otherwise fine. Do you like chocolate milk? LOVE IT Do you own a bike? We own a family bike and I’m free to use it, I just don’t because I don’t know how lmao Are you taller than your mom? No. I thought I’d grow taller than her because I had an intense growth spurt at one point, but it never happened. Have you ever been engaged? No. What, in your opinion, is the ugliest name? I’m not a fan of names that end in -leigh, but I don’t think they’re ugly names.

[rmg91]

The Woes and Antics of Living Together-18

AAAAHHHH!!!!! I've gotten to another chapter I've been dying to write!!! And while the part I was most excited for didn't come out quite like I wanted (Curse me for never writing things down when they happen five months ago) I still like the way that it happened. I'll admit, I'm a little bit mean to Poppy in this chapter but Branch helps make it better.

Enjoy!

Also Friendship Goals-When you and a friend have similar-ish ideas without talking to each other XD

Previous Chapter/Next Chapter; AO3;FF.net

@writerofberk-I feel bad for what I’ve done to Poppy but I also much enjoy the fluff I wrote to make up for it XD

                                                     ~*~*~*~*~*~

The sky was cloudy but bright with a light breeze as Poppy happily walked back to the apartment, Planning Clipboard in hand. A bag a of fresh, blank invitations hung from her wrist, ready to be customized for the upcoming event. Creek's surprise birthday party was coming along and she couldn't be more excited. Of course, everyone knew Poppy always threw her friends' parties, ever since she was young, but the how, when and where was how the surprise came in and boy did she love to throw surprise parties. They were her jam after all! And she had to make sure this one would be perfect for Creek. She was finally going to tell him how much she really felt about him and ask him to be her boyfriend. There was never any rule that said she couldn't be the one to ask and she was tired of waiting.

Poppy flipped through her list of party essentials as she hummed a love song, check-marking things off as she went. Suki had told her the music was set, a mix of songs to dance to and more mellow ones to set the atmosphere. Alongside some of Creek's favorite instrumental scores from movies. Decorations were all gathered, the usual collection of balloons, streamers, tablecloths and fairy lights, with some more unique additives to fit their theme. They had small Buddha statues to set around, lotus flower cutouts to hang up, scented and non-scented candles, a few incense burners and some pretty gem stones to sprinkle around. Next was the menu, which thankfully they had found a happy medium for, tasty but healthy snacks. They'd have various dips, hummus, guacamole and a Greek yogurt one Poppy found a recipe for, with a host of vegetables and baked chips. Dried fruit and nuts to nibble, fresh fruit parfaits, homemade fruit punch and some of Biggie's infamous deviled eggs. They'd also have a few more traditional party snacks and, of course, the six dozen carrot cupcakes Poppy was going to bake. She also had plans to make Creek a full sized cake too.

Last but not least, was the venue and Poppy couldn't be more excited for it. The university had the perfect outdoor area, trees and flowers surrounding an open area that could host tables and decent sized dance area. There was even a covered area, a pretty wooden pergola, built close enough where they could set out the food! Poppy had checked with the school and had luckily been able to rent the place for the night and she just couldn't wait! It would look so pretty all lit up with twinkling lights and candles. It was going to be magical.

Poppy nodded to herself, seeing just about everything checked off, the only things were whatever last minute details that always popped up and of course her present for Creek. She had thought about going along with the Pack's idea of just her being his present but she wanted to gift him something as well. Trouble was, she couldn't decide. She had seen a really pretty incense burner at the shop they got all the stones from but she also knew he had a tiny collection of them, so she felt like she could find something different. There was also the necklace she saw with the small charm of a mandala but Creek really wasn't big on wearing jewelry besides the friendship bracelet she had made him. She could just always find him a new pair of flip-flops, at least that's what Branch had said when she had been brainstorming out loud. Then it hit her! The perfect gift idea! She could make up a basket of all his favorite bath products! Creek always loved to talk about the benefits of good hygiene and Poppy knew long, hot baths were the only guilty pleasure he really allowed himself. It was perfect!

The pinkette made a note about her idea, listing what she'd need to get alongside a reminded to look up some DIY bath-bombs. She'd always wanted to try making some and that just seemed like it would help make her gift just a little more special. Giggling, she danced a happy jig, her excitement and inspiration overflowing before heading inside her building, an invite decorating storm was about to take place!

                                        ~*~*~*~*~*~

Branch was not amused to come home to what could only described as an explosion of paper and glitter. Scraps of construction paper littered the floor around the coffee table, with said surface overflowing with Poppy's collections of craft supplies. Small buckets of shaped scissors, stamps, stamp ink and shaped hole punches were stacked across the far side, various ones Poppy had already used laying loose. Her extensive sticker collection was spread out around her, the folders she kept them leaning beside her on the couch, with a few empty sheets on the floor. There were various types of glue sitting in places and the table sparkled with the tell-tale sign of glitter having been spilled out of its container. A pile of invitations sat completed on the farthest corner, ready to be given out by a smiling Poppy, who was just finishing up another colorful piece of art.

“Welcome home~!” The pinkette sang, grinning up at him happily as he came inside.

Branch had to try very hard not to look away as she flashed that beautiful, happy smile at him. After her little drunk incident, it had been even harder to look at her without blushing but he had promised her he'd try not to act weird around her after that. But it could be so damn hard, she was just too gorgeous when she was in a good mood and it almost, almost, made him want to spill his guts about his affection for her. Add in he could now recall her saying she wanted him well...the last few weeks hadn't been that easy for Branch when he was alone with her. Especially since Poppy had spent a good portion of them planning out a party for Creek.

“Hey.” He finally said back, turning to go find something in the kitchen. What he really didn't know but he couldn't take the risk of just staring at Poppy, “I see you've made a mess of our living room.”

“Oh shush!” Poppy giggled before throwing her arms out wide and shouting, “Art knows no bounds! And invitations won't make themselves!”

Branch rolled his eyes before mumbling, “Could always just get pre-made ones...” Even though he knew she would never, Poppy adored making custom invitations and, if Branch was being honest with himself, he liked seeing her creations. Even if he didn't show it.

Poppy gasped dramatically, having heard him, “Nonsense! I would never!” She giggled before perking up and flipping through her finished pile, “Speaking of...” She pulled one out and scurried over to Branch before thrusting out a colorful, sparkling envelope at him.

“Poppy...” He warned, of course she would try to invite him to the party she was throwing for Creek.

“Please?” She begged, eyes wide and she held out the invitation, “I know, I know. You 'don't do parties' but I promise it's not gonna be a loud, crazy, super amazing one. It's gonna be a little more calm, no flashing lights but still a lot of fun one. Pleeease? You'd have fun~”

Branch doubted that. There was no way he was gonna watch her, and everyone else, fawn over Creek. “No.”

Poppy predictably pouted before she gently shoved the small packet of paper into his hands, “Just think about it, okay? There's time to change your mind.”

Branch wasn't going to but she didn't need to know that. He just took the envelope without fuss and made to go to his room, saying something about having some homework to finish. In reality he was going to add the newest invitation to his collection after opening it. He just hoped she passed on the glitter bomb this time.

                                  ~*~*~*~*~*~

The day of the party arrived a few days later and Poppy could barely contain her excitement. She had spent all of the previous afternoon baking and frosting cupcakes, so now she had four dozen carrot cake cupcakes, alongside another two dozen of vanilla. The vanilla ones she had decided to bake at the last minute for some variety and so she could use sprinkles. Sprinkles made everything better. She had also baked up a vanilla bean cake just for Creek and now that it was cool, she just had to work her frosting magic on it but first she was heading to the university. She wanted to get a head start on the decorating before handing off the duty to Guy and Biggie.

Poppy took a look around the courtyard they would be occupying when she got there, grin wide as she pictured how wonderful it would look when they were done. Gathering all the supplies she would need, she stacked all of the streamers, paper hangings, lights, lanterns and all the other bits on a table, organized for easy handling. Then taking a roll of light purple crepe paper, the pinkette looked around for a good starting point, deciding to start with twisting it around the pergola's posts. Once finished with the purple streamers, Poppy grabbed a roll of a pretty aqua green to wrap around the alternating posts and from there started to hang long, twisted rows across the beams. By the time Guy and Biggie showed up, with Suki and her DJ equipment in tow, she had a good base of things started.

Her friends quickly jumped in to help her, so Poppy took a quick moment to film them while they worked before placing her camera back on it's mini tripod. They worked together efficiently after years of doing this and soon they had more streamers stretching overhead with lights intermingling. Suki had her DJ table set up under an awning where it would close enough to hear but out of the way so no one would trip on any wires and Poppy was standing on a chair hanging paper decorations when Smidge rolled in with Cooper. They had the coolers and bags of food with them, so Poppy directed them to store it all inside the small kitchen of the building the pergola was connected to. Said building was part of the Home Economics division and had a few kitchens, one of which they were allowed to use. Once everything was looking like Poppy had envisioned, she left the Pack to complete setting up the tables and such while she headed home to decorate Creek's cake and grab his gift.

Coming home, she wasted no time gathering up the ingredients for buttercream frosting, calling a greeting to Branch who was reading, and threw them all in her stand mixer. Carefully, she pulled the cake out of the oven, where she stored it for safe keeping, and divided it in two. Once satisfied with her frosting, she split it in half and dyed one lavender and the other mint. She then spent the next hour and a half making the cake look how she wanted it. It would have been quicker but she'd wanted to make sure that her crumb coat was fully set in the fridge before continuing, that particular cake recipe was always crumbier than others. She had just piped some frosting flowers around the edge and was piping 'Happy Birthday Creek' on top when she decided to ask Branch again if he wanted to come along.

“Are you suuure you don't wanna come?” She said, focused on her cursive, “It's gonna be fun~”

“Yes, I'm sure.” He grumped at her from his seat in her chair, eyes not leaving his book, “I told you the weather report said it was going to rain today and I am not getting stuck out there in it.” The other reason, of course, was because he didn't want to see Poppy hanging off of Creek and listen to whatever crap the 'guru' always spewed.

Poppy rolled her eyes, setting her piping bag down to gesture outside the window, “It's not gonna rain, Branch! It's sunny and clear,” True it had been a little breezy but that was nothing, “The weather report has been wrong before.”

Branch scoffed, “Still not going and don't blame me when you get rained out.”

Poppy was just about to reply when Satin and Chenille came through the door, “Poppy!”

“We came to get you and save you another trip,” Satin exclaimed, “Are you ready?”

“Just about!” She quickly added a few finishing touches to the cake before sliding it into a box and grabbing Creek's gift basket, “See you later, Branch!”

“You're gonna get rained on!” Was his parting reply.

                                       ~*~*~*~*~*~

After arriving back at the venue, Poppy slipped the cake into the fridge for safe keeping until it was time to serve it before placing her gift with the other few. She then took in all of what the Snack Pack had done while she was gone with a grin. Tables were set up, the white tablecloths fluttering in the breeze, with candles and small flower centerpieces adding charm and whimsy. Some of the incense had already been lit so there was a faint aroma of lavender and vanilla in the air and the lights had just been turned on. Poppy was ecstatic with the way everything looked, especially with the setting sun starting to cast a pinkish glow over everything. Taking her phone out, she quickly snapped a photo to post later before turning to her friends.

“This look amazing, you guys!” She clapped before pulling them into a group hug, “I think Creek's really gonna like it!”

“Oh for sure,” Guy agreed, smirking playfully, “You planned it after all~”

“Stop,” Poppy giggled, “You all helped.”

“But you did the majority of it,” Satin said, wrapping her arm around one of Poppy, “But we'll admit, it needs one more thing...”

Chenille wrapped her arm around Poppy's other, “You to look amazingly stunning~! Come with us!”

Poppy laughed as she was dragged away to the nearest bathroom for a patent Couture twin style up.

                                              ~*~*~*~*~*~

Almost an hour later, Poppy twirled in front of the bathroom mirror, once again impressed and proud of the fashion sisters. They had sewn a brand new dress for her that was a dark aquamarine in color and in the halter top style she loved. It had a sweetheart neckline and the straps wrapped around her neck, leaving her back bare for her tattoo to show. The waistline was cinched slightly under her bodice with a small decorative bow off to the side and it was knee length with a sheer overlay of sparkly organza. Her hair had been pulled up into a higher ponytail with the ends curled so they bounced when she moved alongside the tendrils that framed her face. Her make-up matched with glittery eye-shadow in the same color, light pink blush and strawberry pink lipstick. A matching headband with one silk flower and silver, strappy heels completed the look.

“Girls...” Poppy awed as she spun again, loving the way the dress spun around, “This is beautiful! Thank you so much~”

“You're welcome!” The chirped in unison.

“Now there's absolutely no way Creek won't ask you out tonight.” Giggled Chenille.

“Yes! And we'll all make sure he gets a chance to!” Satin added.

Poppy giggled with a nod, “Right!” She then spun the face them with a clap, “Now let's get out there! Guests should be arriving soon and after that the birthday boy himself! You guys made sure to tell him to meet us here for something right?” It was a safe bet Creek already knew there was a party happening, Poppy was never subtle about that sort of thing but she still hoped it would be a surprise anyway.

“Guy texted him at lunch saying he needed to see him for some school thing.”

“Great!” Poppy clapped, smile wide, “Then let's get out there!” This was gonna be awesome!

When they rejoined the rest of the Pack, Suki had started up the tunes as a few people had already started to show up. Poppy greeted them happily, trading hugs and thanks for coming. She got lots of compliments for how pretty she looked and was even pulled in to some selfies with Guy, since they were both looking gorgeously fabulous. As more and more people began to arrive, Poppy could barely contain herself as she eagerly awaited Creek's arrival, excited for when he'd come to see what they'd put together for him.

The sky was turning progressively darker as time went on, dark clouds moving in and blocking out the few visible stars and the slowly rising moon. Poppy couldn't help but bite her lip as she looked up from lighting a few candles. She hoped they would just blow away soon and that Branch wasn't right about the weather taking a turn for the worst. Her friends tried to assure her it would be alright, if it started to drizzle they could just take the party into the hallway of the Home Ecs building. She had nodded but a tiny knot of worry was starting to form in her stomach, especially when there still wasn't any sign of Creek.

She was trying not to let it show how much she was starting to fret, it wasn't like Creek to miss something without saying anything, when she felt the first rain drop hit her nose. She glanced up at the clouds as more drops began falling, the peppering of rain hitting the sidewalk echoing around her. She and the Pack quickly directed guests indoors before the rain got too bad, snacks  and gifts being grabbed to save them from the water. Poppy hoped it would just a quick little storm, nothing bad enough to delay the party too long but as the rain began to fall harder and faster, soaking all their hard work, the pinkette couldn't help but be disappointed. It also didn't help that there still hadn't been any word from Creek.

Poppy looked down at her phone, hoping to see some missed notification or something indicating Creek had reached out but all that greeted her was her lock screen's picture. She tried not to frown, tried to interact with everyone but as time went on and people started to leave before the storm got any worse, she couldn't help it. It was so unlike him to not say anything, even if he didn't know they were throwing a party for him, he knew they wanted to see him so for none of them to have a message from him...Poppy didn't know what to think. Suki had suggested calling him but before Poppy could try, Guy mentioned he already tried that with the call going straight to voicemail.

Poppy sighed, thoughts and feelings a turbulent mess, “Let's just...call it a night then...” She didn't want to, she hated canceling parties but there was nothing else to be done with the weather the way it was and with the guest of honor missing.

“Pops...” Suki exhaled, reaching out to place a hand on her friends shoulder. She knew how much Poppy had been looking forward to this.

Poppy forced a smile at her orange haired friend, trying not to let it show just how upset she was, “It's okay, Suks'. It's getting pretty bad out there anyway.”

Suki nodded slowly before pulling the pinkette into a hug. Poppy sighed softly and hugged her back, soon enough being engulfed by the rest of the Snack Pack. When they disengaged, Biggie and Guy helped Suki gather her equipment, Cooper went to look for something to store and carry the small pile of gifts, and Smidge went to break the news to the few remaining guests. Poppy peeked outside from the door, looking out into the storm and knowing that they'd have to come back in the morning to clean up when Satin and Chenille approached.

“What do you say to a sleepover tonight?” The younger twin offered, smiling hopefully at her.

“Yeah, yeah! We can give each other Mani-Pedi's, facials, watch trashy romance movies~” Chenille' chimed, hoping the allure of some girl time would help perk Poppy up.

“Ah...” Poppy stalled, not wanting to hurt their feelings but not feeling up to all that, “Thanks you guys but...I think I'd just like to go home...”

The twins shared a concerned look before nodding at Poppy, “Alright...”

“At least let us drive you home?”

Poppy quickly shook her head, “No, I won't let you guys do that. You live almost on the other side of town from where I do and I won't have you out in that for longer than you have to be. I'll just take the bus.”

“But Poppy-” Chenille started.

“Guys, really, it's okay.” Poppy really didn't want to try and explain that she...just didn't want to be around anyone right now. She kind of just wanted to cry really but she didn't want that happen in front of her friends, she was sure it wouldn't help them feel any better about this situation either, so she'd rather have it happen when she was by herself.

The twins frowned and huffed slightly but relented, not liking letting Poppy be by herself tonight. That was when Milton approached, an umbrella in hand, and smiling softly, offered to escort Poppy to the bus stop. She accepted and after another group hug, and promises she'd meet them tomorrow to clean up what was left outside, Poppy and Milton left to reach the bus stop before the next bus arrived.

                                        ~*~*~*~*~*~

Poppy waited for the bus for possibly a little longer than she had to after she waved goodbye to Milton. She had been thankful he hadn't tried to talk her into going home with him and Smidge and had just shared a sympathetic smile before leaving her. She shivered under the awning as she sat there, thinking maybe she should've changed but unable to fix that now. The pinkette stared down at the ground as she waited, frowning at the cement as she hugged herself for warmth. She couldn't accurately describe just how she was feeling at the moment, disappointed that the party had gotten rained out and that all their decorating was now ruined; sad, upset, hurt that the person this was all for hadn't shown up or even called! It was so unlike him too... And the more Poppy thought about it, the more she felt the prickling of tears in her eyes, but she wouldn't cry...not yet at least.

When the bus finally pulled up, she scrambled up the steps and, after disposing of some change, took one of the many empty seats. Poppy leaned her head on the cool glass and listlessly watched the scenery go by, wondering if there had been anything she could've done to change the night's outcome. Of course she knew she couldn't have controlled the weather but maybe she could've been the one to tell Creek to come or maybe even tell him they were throwing a party for him. That would've ruined the surprise sure but...maybe he would've shown up. Sighing, she really didn't know, she closed her eyes tightly to prevent tears from falling as the urge to swelled. She really didn't want to cry here on a public bus, she'd rather wait until she was surrounded by her many stuffed animals and could muffle herself in her pillow.

It was weird to see the streets of town so empty, she thought once the urge passed, the storm having forced everyone home or inside. Poppy watched the rain run in thick sheets down from the sky, the wind blowing it at an angle and sparing nothing from getting drenched. She sighed, wishing for nothing else that she was at home and curled under a warm blanket. Well...she also wished Creek had texted or called or something because it was so unlike him not to and she couldn't figure out why. She knew he wouldn't allow his phone to run out of power or be turned off, it also wasn't like him to misplace it and he would never, ever, just not show up. He always made sure to let someone know if he couldn't make it or if something was wrong. Poppy had worried briefly if maybe he was hurt or had gotten sick but that was silly as he was always safe and was as healthy as can be. There was no way he couldn't have gotten sick, he was fine when she had talked to him that morning.

Sighing once more, the young woman just couldn't come up with a reason as to why he hadn't shown up. Looking out at the dark streets, Poppy noticed a few familiar shops and realized she was close to home, a few more blocks and she could go curl up in her room. However as she was picturing herself cuddling the stuffing out of Fuzzbert 2, the bus started to slow down, with no bus stop in sight. Looking toward the driver, Poppy saw him struggling with the controls before the bus came to a complete stop. The driver tried to turn the bus back on by turning the key a few times but nothing happened.

Sighing, he turned to face Poppy and the two other patrons, “Sorry, folks. Looks like we've run into a little engine trouble. We'll be stuck here until help comes.” He then turned back around to make a phone-call for help.

Poppy leaned back against her seat, frowning, before thinking about what she could do. She really didn't want to sit here... Glancing outside, she knew the thought in her head probably wasn't the best idea but she really just wanted to be home right now. Plus a little rain never hurt anyone. Getting up, she went to the front of the bus and asked if she could be let out here. The bus driver gave her a skeptical look, tried to tell her it would better if she just waited on the bus but she assured him she didn't live that much farther from where they were. Shrugging, he said alright and opened the door for her. Poppy said her thanks before rushing out and under a convenient shop awning.

Bracing herself, she continued to race under awnings and overhangs of shops until she was around the corner and out of sight of the bus. She then took a moment to lean against the side of the building she was by and stare out into the rain. Okay, so yes, this was a bad idea, to walk the rest of the way home in the pouring rain but she was already wet now. Closing her eyes, she let out a little whimper, finally breaking and letting her tears fall. Stepping out into the rain, Poppy let it wash over her, flattening her hair against her skull and ruining her make-up. She really didn't care all that much though, but she did hope the twins would forgive her for soaking the dress they'd made. The dress they had made for her to impress Creek, Creek the person they had been trying to throw a birthday party for, the person that hadn't shown up...Poppy let out another whimper as she thought about everything again, but just wound up more confused and hurt than she had been already. This night had been a disaster.

Finally reaching home, she went inside to the elevator and shivered as she rode it to her floor. She hoped Branch was occupied in his room or maybe even asleep because she really didn't want to listen to him lecture her. Digging out her keys with wet, shaking fingers, she unlocked the door and let herself in.

However the universe wasn't on Poppy's side at that moment as Branch was standing in the kitchen. He looked at her as she came in with wide eyes at her drenched state, hair and dress clinging to her, the flower on her headband dropping and creating a puddle from where she stood. She watched him open his mouth to say something but she held up her hand to stop him, “Please, Branch...just...don't.” She sniffed and hugged herself, head dipping low, “You were right, okay? It rained, enough said, I don't need you to lecture me...”

Branch blinked at her, shocked not only at her coming home so early and admitting she was wrong but also at her body language screaming that something else was the matter. Wanting to ask what was wrong but not wanting to upset her more, he ran a hand through his hair, he was out of his element here, before growling, “Just...stay there.”

He hurried to the linen closet and pulled out two of Poppy's biggest and fluffiest towels before coming back and finding Poppy had only moved to drip on the kitchen floor. Ignoring the way her dress clung to her curves, he wrapped one around her shoulders and after she took hold of it, draped the other over her head. He began to rub the towel over her hair, frowning when she didn't make a noise of complaint. Branch had figured she would be disappointed when the party was ruined by the storm but the way she was acting...something else had to have happened. This wasn't the usual Poppy he dealt with.

When she sniffed quietly under the towel, he couldn't help but ask, “...What happened?”

She was silent for a long moment, and he wasn't going to fault her if she didn't want to answer, when she softly murmured, “...Creek never showed up...”

Branch stilled, unable to comprehend what he just heard but also completely able to believe it. That absolute bastard! Poppy hadn't been subtle with her planning, never was when it came to something for her friends, he had to have known, but for him to not show up?! That was low, even for him. Wanting to go find the jerk and rip him a new one with the sudden, overwhelming urge of protectiveness, Branch's attention was brought back to Poppy as she sniffed again. Taking a deep breath, he'd contemplate what he wanted to do to Creep later, right now Poppy needed to be taken care of.

Carefully tilting her head up so their eyes met, he spoke softly, “Hey, listen to me, okay? Go take a warm shower, nothing too hot or you might shock your body. Then blow-dry your hair, okay? You shouldn't go to bed with wet hair and I am not dealing with you if you get sick.”

Poppy blinked, taken slightly aback from Branch's soft tone but nodded anyway, “Okay.” She then carefully stepped back and shuffled around him to head to the bathroom.

Branch watched her go, concern written clearly across his face before sighing roughly and running his hand through his hair again, there had to be something he could do to cheer her up, right?

                                                      ~*~*~*~*~*~

When Poppy emerged from the bathroom almost an hour later, wrapped in her comfiest pajamas and feeling...well not better, she was still pretty upset but the overwhelming urge to just cry had left, she was met with the sound of whip-cream being sprayed and the delicious aroma of hot chocolate. Wandering back down the hall, she found Branch by the counter, spraying a large dollop of whip-cream into his mug, one of hers sat next it with a smaller dollop flouting on top. Branch glanced up at her and almost dropped the can before smiling awkwardly.

“Uh, hey,” He greeted, rubbing the back of his neck, “I-um..made some hot chocolate.” He carefully held the mug out to her, “We were out of marshmallows though, so I hope you don't mind the whip-cream... I, um, also plugged your phone in and texted everyone you were home.”

Flashing a very small smile, Poppy took the mug gratefully, “That's fine... Thank you.”

“Ah...no problem..” Branch mumbled, feeling just a little uncomfortable doing this, he wasn't use to doing things like this, “I-uh...” He cleared his throat and tried again, “I also queued up a movie if you...felt like watching something...”

Poppy looked over at the TV and sure enough there was Tangled, one of her favorites, all ready to be played. She felt another small smile grow across her face before she took a sip of her drink and glanced at Branch, “I think I do actually. Thank you...” She paused before asking, “Do you...wanna watch with me?”

“Ah, well...” Branch grimaced, hating to disappoint her more, “I actually have to finish studying and writing a paper,” He gestured toward the table that was covered in his text books, “But I'll be out here...”

Poppy nodded and shrugged, “Okay.” She then shuffled over to the couch and, finding Fuzzbert 2 already there waiting for her, snuggled in to watch.

                                        ~*~*~*~*~*~

Poppy watched the credits roll, a soft, content smile on her face as she leaned on Branch's shoulder. He had come over and watched the last few minutes with her which had made her glad. She twisted her head to look up at him, arm wrapping around his in a show of thanks and affection as she thanked him. While she still didn't feel better, she was starting to feel less sad.

“Not a problem,” He answered her, not bothering to remove his arm as he watched the credits. He glanced at her from the corner of his eye before asking, “Want to watch anything else?”

Poppy thought for a moment before nodding, “Yeah, I think I do.”

Branch moved then, getting up the switch movies, “Any requests?”

“Hercules, please.”

The blue haired man nodded and loaded in the movie, joining the pinkette back on the couch before pressing play. She snuggled back into his shoulder, arm wrapping around his again and happily waited as the movie started, all while the storm raged on.

                                       ~*~*~*~*~*~

When Poppy awoke later on, she knew it was later in the night; or early in the morning; and the storm was still going hard, rain and wind rattling the window. The TV was the only light source, casting a dull glow around the living room, the start screen for the movie still showing. She blinked blearily for a moment before realizing she was warm and that her pillow was moving. Glancing upwards, she found Branch sleeping soundly and that she was cuddled into his chest. Smiling, she shifted slightly before crossing her arms and resting her head on them, watching her roommate sleep.

He was the absolute sweetest, even if he didn't want to admit it, having done all he did for her when she came home wet and upset. Grabbing towels quickly for her and drying her off, making her hot chocolate, watching her favorite movies with her until they fell asleep in the couch, it was everything she hadn't known she'd wanted to be done. Sighing softly, feeling content and safe in his arms, Poppy was happy to fall back asleep but not before carefully leaning up and softly kissed his cheek and whispering, “Thank you.”

She then happily snuggled back down, sighing blissfully as Branch unconsciously hugged her tighter to him.

                                        ~*~*~*~*~*~

Morning came and with it's dull, gray light filtering into the apartment, woke the two on the couch. Poppy's eyes fluttered open before she yawned, noticing the storm had passed and was now just a steady pitter-padder of rain. She rubbed at her eyes as Branch shifted beneath her and let out a large yawn himself. He groaned slightly, not bothering to open his eyes and tried to sink farther down into the cushions.

“We've got to stop falling asleep on the couch...” He mumbled, uncaring that his arms were still wrapped around Poppy's waist.

The pinkette giggled sleepily, gazing up at him, “Want some coffee?” After Branch hummed his affirmation, she shifted to get up, placing her hands beside his head as she hovered above him.

Branch opened his eyes then to look up at her with a drowsy expression, “Hey...You feel better?”

“Yeah...” She answered quietly.

He smiled then, something small and sleepy, before unconsciously raising a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, “Good...Like seeing you happy...Suits you.”

Another soft giggle and Poppy gently nuzzled her cheek into his hand where it rested, “It suits you too.”

Branch snorted before letting his hand fall away and his head lull backwards, grunting, “Coffee.”

Poppy giggled once again and got up, letting her hands trail through his hair as she walked away to start the coffee machine. Humming the tune to 'I See The Light' softly, she filled it with some of their shared favorite brand before turning back to see if he had sat up, only to find he had instead fallen back asleep. Watching the steady rise and fall of his torso, Poppy decided to let him sleep a little longer, it was the least she could do after all he'd done for her. She would always be thankful for that and for having such a caring best friend.

                                              ~*~*~*~*~*~

GUYS! YOUR FEELINGS A SHOWING!

And, Poppy, gurl, you still don't see it yet? Okay, I did that on purpose but still XD Anyway! See told you Branch helped make it better! And Creek's a real creep not even texting to say he's not showing up but that was all planned and we're getting really close to the climax of this fic! I can't tell you how excited I am for that!!! I've been waiting to write these next few parts since January!!!

So I hope you all enjoyed and look forward to the next chapter!!

[cutiecrates]

September 2019 Lucky Treat!

Well here we are guys, finally! As it turns out, I was supposed to get this on my birthday (the 15th) and it came, but at the time I was taking a nap because I was gone most of the day and I felt really tired when I got home. So they showed up around 6pm but nobody answered the door, and since I had to sign for it they left.

This isn’t the first time this has happened, I somehow miss foreign packages I need to sign for <_< my mom and I argue over this every time, and as I expected it didn’t come the next day. I wasted 2-3 hours stalking the front door and not leaving the room at all for anything. So yesterday morning we picked it up, but it just wasn’t a good day to try to post this.

It’s also the reason why my next review hasn’t been posted but you can expect to see that later today. So for now, let’s focus on this!

As a reminder I won’t be reviewing these items due to them being sent for free. I’ll just be showing them and giving my opinions.

(Note the Kawaii Box I’m supposed to review in the background...)

Okay, so as you can see this is exactly how it arrived. I initially assumed it would be one large box, so I was actually relieved to see it consisted of 2 medium-sized boxes. Both were light weight and easy to carry.

Japan Haul, for anyone unfamiliar with the name or new to the blog is the online store belonging to the branding that makes Tokyo Treat, YumeTwins, NMNL. You can find a lot of the box items, as well as some unique items on there, which is why I try to recommend you check it out if you’re ever interested in the items from those boxes. There wasn’t any special papers or anything in the box, but each of them had an “order summery sheet“ and a sheet of protective Styrofoam on the bottom.

Before I begin I wanted to mention that usually there’s a “value“ depicted in the information or picture for the Lucky Treat, but this one didn’t have it. On each box it says their values were 1000yen, so combined I think that might be $200.00? I don’t know much about foreign currency so don’t quote me on it.

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Mew Plushie & Vulpix Plushie

Anyone who reads this blog knows that I am OBSESSED with Vulpix/Rokon- it was the reason I just had to have this box, and it hasn’t left my side since I opened the one it was inside. It was true love from the day we met; I have various Vulpix items, including a smaller plush from a KFC promotion when I was a kid, a couple toy items, stickers, coloring book pages, and several TCG cards in both English and Japanese~

About a year or so back they were featuring Vulpix (normal and Alola) in Japanese merch. I’ve always wanted to visit Japan, but that was probably when I wanted it the most.

The plush is pretty big (although I know in comparison to the Mew it doesn’t look it), it’s the perfect lap size~ It’s also very soft, with fluffy material for the hair and tails that is a combination of rose swirls and tufts. The tails are one solid piece with lines between them to give them the feel of individual pieces, but the curled portions are separated. I love love love love love it~

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So as you can tell, Vulpix isn’t the only plush we got in this months box :3 in fact we got a handful more to go- including this really big Mew Plush. Currently this is the second biggest Pokemon Plush I own, it’s a few inches taller than the piplup I won at the fair a few years back, but smaller than the Meowth I got when I was a kid.

This plush is made from the same fabric as the vulpix but lacks the fluffy hair accents. The sewn details are perfect, it’s feet are properly stuffed and a little floppy, while its super-long tail is sewn to the back, so I assume it would dangle if I cut the strings. He’s great for hugs.

Flaaffy Plushie & Mini Eeevee Plushie

We got 2 more Pokemon plushies, including this very small Flaaffy plush~ It’s like the Vulpix in which it has normal plush fabric, and slightly softer fabric for the wool on its neck and head. It’s stitching and details are great, it’s a really good quality plushie.

According to its tag it’s part of a Pokemon Fit line. I never heard of it so I don’t really know what it contains- but I think it’s adorable how out of the 4 Pokemon it’s normally the biggest, and here it’s the smallest. It fits in the palm perfectly. 

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Our final Pokemon plushie is an adorable, fluffy Eevee. I really like Eeevee and its eeveelutions, and I really liked playing Let’s Go Eeevee! so this was a lovely surprise; now if only I had some items to make it match mine~

It’s well made and very cute and sweet looking, and according to the tag this came out last year- probably for Let’s Go Eeevee :P It’s a big bigger than Flaaffy, but still fits in the palm nicely. I can’t decide if I like its fluffy neck fur or huge tail more~

Kopiyo Friends Cushion

This is our last plush-based item in the box, an adorable cushion themed after an adorable birdie. From Kopiyo Friends there was a variety of various birds you could get in this set, but for Lucky Treat it was this specific... parakeet? It looks like the ones I used to have when I was little, so I’ve been calling it that.

 It’s a good size for a pillow (head, lap, legs, etc) and it’s stuffed enough to feel marshmallowy squishy, and it stretches a little bit. It was very comfortable, and it makes for a nice secondary pillow you can cuddle with.

Solgaleo Figure & Mewtwo Mug

If you guys couldn’t tell this box was almost entirely Pokemon oriented :3 and to go with our plushies, we have a Solgaleo figurine from the latest handheld Pokemon games (until sword and shield comes out anyway). It’s from the Moncolle-EX collection of Pokemon figures... and that’s pretty much all I can say other than it’s paint quality is great. I’m not sure about the figure quality itself because I won’t be removing it from the packaging. I might give it to my friend, who bought this version of the game. 

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Now this next item goes with the Mew I got, and I think they were both made to celebrate the upgraded/updated Mewtwo Strikes Back movie. I know my picture quality of this sucks, but I was kind of on a time crunch at this point... and by that I mean, I had cats going crazy in the background trying to get in my way and play with the boxes <_<

The mug has a very detailed, mood-setting picture for the movie. I have to admit it’s not really my style (CUTIEcrates probably says it all right?), but I do like it as a Pokemon fan and I’ll find a use for it.

Gengar Mask & Pokemon Memo

Now this is an item perfect for this time of the year, as well as when I clean or when the allergies hit (where was it during summer when I needed it?!). I did have one mask from a really old DokiDoki, but I have no clue where that went.

I love Gengar (at this rate it’s easier just to say every Pokemon in this box are ones I like, nearly), so this is a cute, funny little item. It’s a nice, padded mask with two layers of filtered-like fabric over the part covering your nose and/or mouth. I’m not really sure if they serve a purpose (maybe filtering dust or scent or something?) but they have a nice clean smell.

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We can’t forget the stationery items now :3 and to go with all of our Pokemon goodness we have a notepad with 4 sets of 8 different designed papers! They easily tear apart and come from the Pokemon World Market series, featuring the various Pokemon from various regions hanging out and having fun.

Pokemon World Market Re-Ment & Colorful Ramune Blind Bag

I’m assuming the Pokemon World Market is a current series/collection :3 because next we have an adorable re-ment set. I miss getting re-ments in the boxes, so this was very exciting. Like the notepad, these were based on various regions foods, Pokemon, and activities. Such as the one I got, the Kanto region, having a bike, a Poke Flute, and a Pokemon Doll. Each one also includes a map of the specific region.

If you were curious, here are what the others had: 

2. Squirtle Watering can, toy, milk, manju/dorayaki?

3. Torchic, Rice cracker, Pokeblock storage, and what looks like an envelope and ticket.

4. Piplup, helmet, shovel, what looks like chocolate, and Poffins.

5. A Pokedoll, a ferris wheel toy, and ice cream.

6. Pokedoll, food, skates, and the girl trainers hat.

7. A book or magazine with Snorlax, a toucan measuring piece(?), a bowl or fruit in a box, and an Alola Exeggutor pen with base.

Now compared to the others, mine feels pretty simple. But the detail on each piece is amazing; I could look at re-ments all day~ I really wish I could display mine, but I just don’t have a safe place or any room for them at the time. As much as I think a re-ment subscription box would be fun, I’m kinda glad they don’t have one of those :P I’d be in trouble.

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Now, this is a Tokyo Treat special box, of course there has to be a couple food items~ and first up is a Pokemon, Wobbuffet bling bag candy tin, which features 6 different designs that feature Wobbuffet interacting with various Pokemon. They’re all so cute!

But lookie lookie, did you notice which one I got~? The special mystery one :D I’m not sure if that was intentional or not, but I thought it was a fun additional surprise.

There are 3 flavors of candy, including a blue ramune/soda, yellow... I think lemon (but it could be banana? It doesn’t taste like it though), and a pinkish-red one that I couldn’t identify. It might be cola, because it tastes like a nasty cola Japanese candy DIY I tried a couple years back- one of the only cola flavors I didn’t like. But the candies are pretty good, even that weird might be cola one.

Pokemon Nori Chips & Dragonball Super Candies

Given the few Non-Pokemon items in the box, I was surprised to see this Dragonball themed candy. These come in a tin-like piece similar to old-style Japanese fruity hard candy. I’ve seen them several times but never had them before- and let me tell you, it’s a picnic trying to open these! You’ll definitely want a pen or scissors or a cornered object or something, nails are not recommended though. But maybe mine are just wimpy. The good news is that you don’t have to worry about them spilling.

Anyway, these are just cute orange spherical candies with a simple orange-ish flavoring to them. It’s not overly sweet or tangy, so it’s good if you like a mild candy.

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To kick up the snacks, we also have some curry-flavored Nori Chips/Seaweed. They come in this adorable Pokemon tin featuring Pikachu and some other impressive pokemon, and the inside is lined by pleated paper. The tin is 71.0 calories.

The seaweed/nori is thin, but in 2 layers, with curry flavored powder/substance between them. If you don’t like the taste of curry or seaweed you probably won’t like these, but if you do then you will. I actually really like eating seaweed as a snack, and curry is pretty yummy so I really like them x3 they’re not spicy, but it seems to pick up heat the more you eat of them. They’re also very crunchy.

Pokemon Tote

We also have some fun apparel, including a Pokemon Tote by the brand Outdoor Products, which has been in business since 1973 apparently. It includes a rainbow variety of colorful Pokemon from a few different generations making a variety of poses. I think there’s 2 per Pokemon. The bag also features a velcro strap to hold it shut, and it’s a medium-big size, so it would come in handy for a lot of stuff.

Pokemon Mini Bath Towel

To go with the Pokemon World Market collection, we also have this adorable and colorful mini-bath towel featuring all the different regions Pokemon having a fun time playing and checking things out at their respective hangouts x3

Despite the name, this thing couldn’t be fit into a single picture without losing a lot of detail, so I had to settle for this. It’s very soft fabric, I’m very eager to begin using it because it’ll go great with that set of Pokemon wash clothes I got a few months back.

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Okay guys, that will be it for now! What did you think, was this Lucky Treat good? I really wish the other subscribers could have won this too because it was very fun and exciting- I still can’t believe i won it!

However, I did notice an item is missing. There was also supposed to be a pair of Pokemon Socks that I didn’t find in either box. I checked multiple times, and I couldn’t find anything to say the item was removed from the box, so I don’t know what happened. I messaged them about it, but because this was entirely free, I don’t actually mind the mistake. It happens... of course, if it had been my Vulpix then heads would roll.

Just kidding :P Anyway, I’ll keep you guys updated on that. Until later, remember to hug a Pokemon!

[artificialqueens]

The First Day of Christmas (katlaska) - kamylove

<i>AN A belated Christmas thing. It’s a small miracle that they can be together for Christmas, and they’re not going to waste a minute.</i>

It’s a small miracle that they can be together for Christmas. It took some juggling and a lot of airfare, but they’ve got three days, and Katya doesn’t plan to waste a minute. She arrives at the hotel near her parents’ house the morning of Christmas Eve, and goes straight to the mall where she worked in high school to buy all the tacky, disposable decorations left on sale. She hums Alaska’s Christmas Queens songs (because Alaska’s are the best ones, obviously) while she hangs the most ostentatious display she can hang, without incurring a fee from the hotel. She goes to see her family for dinner, and uses their wrapping paper, because she <i>knew</i> she’d forgotten something at the mall, and steals a big roll of ribbon. She’s buzzing with energy and dominating conversation, but they’re used to that. Still, she leaves early; she’s driving even herself crazy, and to be honest she’s a bit lonely, so she goes back to their suite to wait for Alaska’s late flight. Once there she ends up redoing all the decorations, because she’s having one of those can’t sit still days, and she texts Alaska a long, giddy stream of holiday and heart emojis that she’ll see when her plane lands. Then she watches <i>Rudolph</i>, and sends Alaska, one line at a time, The Absolutely True Love Story of Yukon Cornelius and The Abominable, wherein Yukon is a bottom and loves toothy blowjobs, and it’s a myth that the Abominable had <i>all</i> his teeth pulled which is a damn good thing for Yukon, and falling off the cliff is an orgasm metaphor, and … “Making me laugh like that in the fucking airport!” Alaska texts finally. “YOU’RE HERE YOU’RE HERE YOU’RE HERE,” Katya texts back. “Renting the car right now, please put your masterpiece on pause so I can pretend to be a normal human being.” “I’M A LITTLE HYPERACTIVE TODAY,” Katya replies. Alaska sends a heart and a brain. Katya sends a heart and a snake, and then gets a bit carried away with eggplants and a whole lot of peaches. <><><> Katya had texted the key code in the middle of her gay Christmas special text storm, so Alaska punches it in without knocking and wheels her bags inside. She barely gets out, “Merry Christmas, bitch,” before there’s an unholy shriek, a door opening, and a whirl of color barreling towards her. This is not a new thing, so Alaska braces herself while Katya gloms onto her with arms around her neck and legs around her waist. <i>(“Maybe try that with a little less momentum next time,” Alaska had said, right after landing on her tailbone the first time Katya bowled her over.)</i> Thankfully, Alaska’s able to lean back into the wall, instead of falling on the floor. She wraps her arms around Katya to help keep her where she is. “Hi,” Katya says right in Alaska’s face. “I’ve been waiting <i>forever</i>.” “My plane landed early!” Alaska says. <i>“Forever,”</i> Katya insists. She grins. “You look yummy.” “You still have toothpaste on your chin, but I really mi-” And Katya cuts her off with a tongue practically down her throat. “Missed you anyway,” Alaska finishes when she can get a word in. Katya squeals, a little too close to Alaska’s ear, and then apologizes. “I’m just so happy to see you!” Katya says, like she always does. “I love that you’re so happy to see me,” Alaska says, like she always does. They both know Alaska’s just as happy, if better able to contain herself. “Now get down. I’m fucking exhausted, and I’m about to drop you.” Katya doesn’t lower herself to the floor so much as jump, and then she’s grabbing Alaska’s hand and pulling her further inside. “Look what I did!” she says. Alaska follows with a grin, and the grin turns into a shocked bark or laughter as she looks around. The space is full of red and green streamers and garlands, paper stockings and snowflakes and snowmen–one of them labeled “Abominable, A Top (not an accurate likeness)”–and a big Christmas tree sticker on the wall. There’s plastic holly and poinsettia and mistletoe. There’s a three-foot candy cane that seems, worrisomely, to be real, with a ribbon of red, green, and gold plaid tied around it. And there’s a banner that says, “Happy Thanksgiving,” complete with a turkey in a stupid pilgrim hat. “It was on clearance,” Katya explains, waving her arms and pointing to make sure Alaska sees everything. Then there are half a dozen pictures of Alaska on stage, and when Alaska gets closer she can see they have helpful notes like, “I was staring at your ass the whole time,” and “You missed the high note,” and “I’m stealing this wig in particular,” and “Squeeze my boob, baby.” And there’s a brightly-wrapped nativity set that looks like– “Is that <i>chocolate</i>?” Alaska asks. “Dibs on baby Jesus!” Katya says in a rush. It’s all very crazy and very Katya, and Alaska tells her so. “It’s a <i>disastah</i> and it’s so you I want to fuck it,” she says. Katya screams out a laugh and wheezes and manages to say, “I knew you would! I knew you would, that’s why I brought extra condoms!” “You’re so good to me,” Alaska says. “I am, aren’t I?” Katya smiles flirtatiously. “Oh!” She holds up a hand to say stop. “Are you hungry? I have leftovers for you! And pizza!” “The traditional Christmas pizza?” “It’s got lots of vegetables on it. It’s like a cooked salad with cheese! Well, half of it has cheese.” “That sounds a lot worse than it probably tastes,” Alaska says. Katya bounces over to the mini-fridge. In the middle of opening it, she looks back and says, “Oh! I only had salad for dinner! And fruit for breakfast!” “Did you now?” Alaska asks. “I did,” Katya says as if she’s talking dirty. Alaska laughs, and Katya piles her arms full of tupperware and a pizza box. <><><> After pizza (Katya scrapes the cheeseless vegetables off the top and makes sure Alaska’s watching), and potatoes and squash and peas, they settle down to watch <i>Santa Claus Conquers the Martians</i>. They’re only a few minutes in when Alaska, yawning, lays her head on Katya’s shoulder. She sighs happily when Katya pets her thigh, and Katya can tell how tired she is by the way she’s holding herself, melting into Katya’s side. “Sleepy?” Katya asks. “Mmm.” “Want to go to bed?” “Not if you’re not.” Katya smiles. She loves sappy Alaska, and exhaustion brings out the sappiest Alaska. The sofa they’re sitting on looks almost long enough for Alaska to lie down, so Katya moves to the end. She coaxes Alaska to stretch out and put her head in in Katya’s lap. Alaska grumbles, but makes a happy sound when she’s settled. Katya combs her fingers through Alaska’s curls. “Are we growing this out again, or have you just been too busy?” Katya asks.

“Too busy. But I’ve been tempted lately to shave it all off like yours.” She finds Katya’s spare hand and brings it to her chest. “Hey,” she notices, holding it out again so she can see better, “your nails are did!” Katya flutters both hands to show them off. One is a a messy red, one a messy green, and just one thumb is a glittery white she got for $.49 at the mall. “Tell me how pretty they are,” she says. Alaska laughs. “They’re very pretty.” “Really?” “Actually it looks like a hack job you did because you were bored. But they’re gorgeous, because they’re on you.” Katya squeals and goes back to playing with Alaska’s hair. It doesn’t take long for Katya to get bored with the movie and start yawning herself, and Alaska’s already sound asleep. She’s curled up and snoring a little and she looks too comfortable to move, but they’ll both regret it if she doesn’t. “Wake up, bitch,” Katya says. “Time for bed.” Alaska mumbles, “I’ll just stay here.” “No, you won’t. It’ll kill your back.” “All downhill after thirty,” Alaska says, as Katya leads her by the hand into the other room. <><><> Alaska’s dreaming, but she’s also aware of Katya getting out of bed and returning, slightly damp, and it seems like a new dream and a long time before the nose-licking starts. “Wake up!” Katya’s saying. Lick. “Wake up!” Lick, lick. “Wake uuuuuup.” Alaska fights a sneeze and opens one eye. “This again,” she says as she sees that it’s still dark in the room. She not-so-secretly loves her Katya-shaped alarm clock, but she’ll complain about it until she dies. “What is wrong with you?” Katya licks her nose again. “Wake uuuuuuup.” “I’m going to tell your parents you’re defective.” “They won’t take me back. They won’t take me back! You’ve already opened my box!” “Damn,” Alaska says, smiling. “I’m stuck with you.” “You are!” Another lick. “Wake up! It’s Christmas!” “Nobody over the age of ten is awake yet, Kati.” “But I wanted to give you a chance to play with your present before we have to leave,” Katya says. Alaska’s suspicious, but she grins anyway. “You got me a present?” “Of course I got you presents, you idiot. But I really need to give you this one in private.” She starts lifting the covers. “Oh, no, you didn’t,” Alaska says, covering her eyes. “I did!” Katya says. She grabs the hand Alaska has over her eyes and drags it down to her dick, which is decked out in the same red, green, and gold ribbon as the giant candy cane. Alaska pulls her hand back. “I can’t believe you,” she says fondly. “You don’t like it?” Katya shifts so she can press the ribbon against Alaska’s bare stomach. It tickles. “I’ll like it after the sun comes up,” Alaska says, pretending to turn away. Katya stops her and starts poking. “Al.” Poke. “Al.” Poke. “Al. How are you going to write me a thank you note if you don’t at least see if it works?” Alaska can’t fake it anymore. She gives in and cracks up. “I win!” Katya says. “Always. But I haven’t read the directions yet. I don’t even know how to turn it on.” “I’ll download the PDF for you later.” <i>(On New Year’s Eve, once Alaska’s back on the road, she’ll get a text with a detailed diagram and directions written in Katya’s handwriting, and it will make her day. And she’ll write a very dirty thank you note in response.)</i> Alaska laughs and stretches out on her back, pulling Katya on top of her and squeezing her ass. “Sooo,” she says, “I’m getting the feeling you want me to fuck you.” Katya gasps as if she hasn’t been dropping hints for two days. “How did you know?” “Women’s intuition,” Alaska says. “I’m in your head, baby.” She squirms and smirks and says demurely, “I mean, if you’re feeling it today.” “Like you need to ask,” Alaska says. “I’m just going to clean up a bit first, okay?” As she walks away, she hears Katya jump up and start rifling through plastic shopping bags, and decides she’s not going to ask. She’s glad she didn’t, when she returns a few minutes later. Katya’s not looking her way, so Alaska takes a step back to watch quietly. There’s obviously a surprise coming, and she doesn’t want to ruin it. Katya’s bent over, ass in the air, muttering to herself as she yanks a Santa hat out of one bag, and goes back to searching all the others. “Aha!” she says as she pulls out reindeer antlers and a wrapped box that’s just the right size for what Alaska thinks–knows–is in it. Alaska grins helplessly. She loves this lunatic so much. She ducks further back as Katya turns towards the bed, so it really is a surprise when she finally reveals herself. Katya’s laid out on her side, arm raised with a flourish. The Santa hat is on her head, and something suspiciously shaped is underneath it. “Merry Christmas!” she says, and points to her ribbon-wrapped dick. “Maybe I don’t need directions after all,” Alaska says. She steps to the edge of the bed, and Katya kneels in front of her on the mattress. “Take it off!” Katya says. “Take it off, take it off!” “What? My underwear?” Alaska asks, playing along. “That too. But no!” She gestures at the hat. “This, this, this!” Alaska does, and pretends to be surprised at the fuzzy antlers. “A shocking reveal!” she says. Katya grabs the hat and stands up to put it on Alaska’s head. “Hi Santa,” she says. “Do you want to see my shiny red ass? I can light up <i>your</i> sleigh.” “Ruining my entire fucking childhood,” Alaska says. Katya wheezes out a long laugh, very pleased with herself, so Alaska strips off her last bit of clothing, pushes Katya backwards onto the bed, and climbs on top of her. Then she kisses Katya madly, before Katya can say anything. They both moan happily into the kiss, and Katya opens her legs so Alaska can slide in between them. “Oh, my God, that thing is going to drive me crazy,” Alaska says, pulling back while Katya laughs at her. “You don’t like your present?” “This fucking ribbon.” Alaska tugs at it as she kneels between Katya’s legs. “It’s itchy as hell. How are you wearing it?” “I suffer for looooove,” Katya says. Cackling, Alaska tosses the thing aside, and lets Katya pull her head down to continue the kissing. But she’s got other ideas, so she starts moving south, to kiss Katya’s neck, her clavicle, her sternum, while Katya squirms beneath her. She follows the happy trail straight down, tugging on a few short hairs with her teeth, and skips right over Katya’s dick. “You complete cunt,” Katya complains, and thrusts her hips up to emphasize where she wants Alaska’s tongue. But Alaska shuts her up by sucking one of Katya’s balls into her mouth. She hums a random little tune, knowing the vibrations will drive Katya crazy, sucks in both balls, and smiles when she feels Katya’s hand land gently on her head. “Up or down?” Alaska asks. When she gets no answer, she tries again. “Kataya. Up or down?” “Oh, God, <i>both</i>.” “No,” Alaska says, and licks just below the scrotum. “You have to choose.” Katya groans and hesitates for a moment before yanking her legs up and out ot the way. “Good choice.” But Alaska doesn’t move, waiting for Katya to beg, which she does. Kind of. “What the fuck,” she says, tugging at Alaska’s hair. “Why isn’t your tongue in my sphincter yet?” Alaska laughs and traces a line with her tongue and laps at Katya’s hole just once. “Oh, my God, fuck you,” Katya says. “Always in such a hurry,” Alaska says before she starts licking again. She circles and tongues and strokes and gets lost there for a while, listening to all the delicious sounds Katya’s making. Eventually she asks, “Is this enough? Fingers?” Katya takes a minute to reply. Finally she tugs at Alaska’s curls again. “Put,” she says breathlessly. “I need. Mouth.” Alaska keeps her own mouth right where it is and holds up a hand for Katya to suck, and Katya does, hungrily. She shudders as she catches Alaska’s fingers between her lips, and Alaska shudders as Katya bites down. It’s painless, but Alaska says, “Ow, fuck,” anyway, to make Katya laugh. Then she raises her head for a few moments, watching Katya blissfully slurp on her fingers. Her eyes are closed, she’s breathing hard, and she doesn’t even seem to notice that Alaska’s stopped. Blissful Katya, anxiety free and living only in the moment, is always one of the most erotic things Alaska’s ever seen, reindeer antlers or not. She shifts her weight so she can wrap her free hand around her own dick, and licks up all the precum on Katya’s. Then she focuses back on Katya’s ass until Katya writhes and lets go of Alaska’s fingers to suck in a breath. Alaska uses those fingers to circle Alaska’s hole, and the change in sensation makes Katya’s eyes snap open. Laughing, Alaska sits up and asks, “So how are we doing this?” “You <i>do</i> need directions,” Katya says. “Let me rephrase. How exactly would you like my member inserted into your rectum?” “I don’t care as long as it’s inserted.” But then her eyes get wide and she says, “No! I do care! Lap sex!” She pushes herself up. “Come here! Sit here!” Alaska goes happily and lets Katya arange her however she wants. She ends up sitting against the headboard, with crossed legs. Katya reaches over her to get the lube and a condom, hands them both to Alaska, and watches Alaska unroll the latex. There’s a filthy look on Katya’s face as she sing-songs, “I want to see your eyes, and I want burning thighs.” “And I am happy to oblige,” Alaska says. “Always writing lyrics,” Katya teases. She holds her hand out for some lube and Alaska lets it dribble into her palm. Then they’re both slicked up and Katya’s straddling, then squatting over Alaska’s hips, one hand on Alaska’s shoulder and one between their bodies. Katya lowers herself slowly, making Alaska hiss at the tight heat. She meets Katya’s eyes and smiles, and Katya grins back at her. “Nice,” Alaska says Katya closes her eyes and sighs. She starts riding Alaska but stops quickly, her nose wrinkling up. “Okay?” Alaska asks immediately. “More lube?” “Mmm.” Alaska finds it and hands it over, and a few seconds later Katya’s smiling again as she slides down and sits unmoving on Alaska’s dick. She cradles Alaska’s face in her hands and kisses her, and kisses her again. They melt and fuse and grind together, slowly, with Katya’s dick trapped between them, until Alaska can hardly stand it. She wriggles a little, moaning into Katya’s mouth, and when that doesn’t work, she runs her fingers lightly down Katya’s chest, tickling. Katya laughs helplessly, and Alaska shoves her back far enough to grab her dick. “Oh, fuck,” Katya says. “Fuck yes.” She raises herself up, finally, and Alaska takes a deep breath as she slams back down. Alaska tightens her grip and all at once they’re both frantic, giving and taking, grunting and groaning and shivering, and she struggles to keep her eyes on Katya’s face. She wants to remember <i>everything</i>. “Yes,” Katya says. “Yes yes.” Then, “No,” as she shoves Alaska’s hand aside to pump her own dick. The pressure in Alaska’s groin is almost unbearable. “Thighs burning yet?” she asks. “I didn’t even notice!” Katya stills halfway down. “Fuck, fuck, ow, fuck.” But she starts up again anyway, and says, “Ow, ow, ow.” “Want to lie down?” Alaska lays her hands on Katya’s hips and puts some more effort into thrusting, to give Katya a break, but Katya just keeps saying, “Ow!” It’s adorable and funny and hot and Alaska’s so ready. She can hardly hold it in and she pushes up hard, to let Katya know. Katya moans out a long, “Aaah,” and softly touches Alaska’s jaw. “Come first,” she says. Alaska does, easily and breathlessly, her eyes glued to Katya’s. She watches Katya jerk off for a few seconds, then lowers her head just enough to bite one of Katya’s nipples. Then Katya’s groaning and the heat of her orgasm hits Alaska’s stomach. She looks down to watch Katya milk out the last drops and groans at how beautiful it is. “You’re,” Alaska starts, meaning to say something sweet and infatuated. “You’re so-” But she can’t finish, and she ends up smiling stupidly at Katya instead. “No, <i>you’re</i>,” Katya says.

Alaska drags her gaze upwards, and remembers what Katya’s wearing. “You’re a fucking reindeer.” “Thank you, Santa,” Katya says. “I really enjoyed my present, Rudolph.” “Oh, good,” Katya says. “I looked <i>everywhere</i>.” Chuckling, Alaska nudges her aside so she can tie off the condom and toss it on the nightstand. She lies down and stretches out and asks, “What time did you tell them we’d be there?” “Eleven or twelve,” Katya says, yawning. She shuffles around and ends up on her back with her head at the foot of the bed, and snuggles up to Alaska’s calf. Alaska kisses her toes. “So we can sleep a bit more?” “I love that idea,” Katya says. Figuring Katya’s too worn out to move, Alaska hands her a pillow and tugs out the sheet and blanket so she can join Katya at the other end of the bed. She wraps the covers tightly around them both. “Oh, I forgot to give you part two of your sexy present,” Katya says sleepily. “It’ll still be there.” “It might come to life! You never know.” She yawns again, and Alaska feels the exhale on the back of her neck. “Shit, I just gave it away, didn’t I?” Alaska yawns, too. “I didn’t hear a thing,” she says, and clutches Katya’s hand to her chest. <><><> Katya wakes to the sound of the shower. She stretches, looks at the clock, and smiles when she sees the Santa hat perched on top of the bedside lamp. Her head is throbbing, though, for some reason. “Ouch,” she says to herself. “Why?” Because she fell asleep with the reindeer headband on, that’s why. She takes it off and throws it in the direction of the shopping bags, then shuffles into the bathroom to pee and brush her teeth. “Good morning again!” she says to the dark shape behind the curtain. “You’re up!” Alaska peeks her head out and says, “Morning, Rudolph!” Then she hides again, laughing, as Katya tries to pinch her nose. By the time Katya’s done with her own shower, emerging with a towel around her waist, Alaska looks ready to go. She’s sitting in a chair with her legs curled up, reading a book, and she’s got Whitney Houston’s Christmas album playing on her phone. “You’re dressed already,” Katya complains. “You’re not,” Alaska says. Katya flings off the towel with flair and jazz hands. Alaska whistles, which is exactly what Katya knew she would do. Then Alaska tosses her a wrapped box that Katya barely catches. Katya’s spent a lot of time teasing Alaska about her aim. “Sexy present?” she says excitedly. “Sexy present,” Alaska says. “Where’s my part two? Does it involve you staying naked?” “That’s part three, and it’s for later,” Katya says. She looks for the gift she got out last night and forgot. Finding it on the floor by the bed, she hands it delicately to Alaska, because Alaska can’t catch, either. “Bitch,” Alaska says fondly. “Now?” “Now!” Laughing at each other, they both rip into their packages. Katya buys Alaska a different version of the same present every year, but she never knows exactly what Alaska will buy for her. “I knew it!” Alaska says when she sees the plug, which is a heavy and very pretty glass snowman. “It’s gorgeous. Where do you keep finding these things?” “I don’t. They find <i>me</i>.” Admittedly she had to look in every sex shop in Amsterdam before this one found her. “Oh! I’m wearing these today!” “All of them?” “Maybe just one.” The clear box is labeled “Gay Apparel,” and she holds up each Christmas-colored thong in turn, reading out things like, “Fuck Me, Santa” and “Sugar Plum Fairy” and “Taste These Christmas Balls.” “Which one?” she asks Alaska, and holds them all up a second time. “This Candy Cane Won’t Lick Itself,” Alaska decides. Katya smirks at her and puts it on. She strikes a few poses, and Alaska whistles again. “Are you going to wear that?” Katya asks, pointing at the plug. “You’re funny,” Alaska says. “I’ll starve myself if you starve yourself.” “Fuck, I <i>am</i> starving,” Katya suddenly realizes. “Can I have chocolate Jesus?” Alaska reaches for it, and Katya realizes something else. “You already ate a wise man!” “And he was deliciousssss,” Alaska says, stretching out the S, as she hands over the smallest piece. “No fair! He’s three times as big!” Alaska grabs Mary and hands her over, too. “Why am I the one that’s going to hell?” Katya asks. “I’ll be right there with you,” Alaska says. And she starts unwrapping Joseph.

<><><>

A little while later they’re both by the door, about to leave with their two big bags of presents, when Katya puts a hand on Alaska’s arm. “Wait.” Alaska smiles softly at her. “You don’t have to say it, sweetie.” “But I’m going to, and you know I’m going to, and you’d be disappointed if I didn’t.” “The first two are true,” Alaska says. “The third one not so much.” “Shut up,” Katya says, and leans in for a quick kiss. “<i>Thank you</i>, yet again, for rescuing me from my destiny as the spinster uncle all the kids feel sorry for. And for continuing to let me show you off on holidays.” <i>(“I used to go to all these family things, and I always knew I’d never have anyone to take with me,” Katya had said, the first year they were officially together. “Nobody would ever want to put up with the crazy.” Alaska had cried a little and kissed her and said, “I want all the crazy, all the time,” then complained about ruining the eyeliner she wasn’t wearing.)</i> Katya adores her family; Alaska knows how much Katya adores her family. But Katya spent much longer thinking she was unloveable, and it still makes Alaska’s heart hurt when she remembers. The Katya she first knew, barely knew, her coworker Katya, wanted love so badly but didn’t know how or where to find it, and made up endless jokes about loneliness instead. Blinking back tears, like she always does, Alaska says, “I’m the one showing your off. And I really love your vagina so freaking much.” Katya grins at her, joy overflowing in her eyes. “And I really love your pussy, you bitch.” They walk out the door hand in hand.

[simplyghosting]

every single unique ask

*cracks knuckles* aight here we go

1:  Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed? Closed. Because 1. If there happens to be a flying bug that I need to kill, I don’t want it hiding in my clothes. and 2. My closet door squeaks, so anyone trying to hide in it, I be knowing.       

2:  Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?  Yes, but then I forget about them and find them in the back of a cabinet 3 years later.       

3:  Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?  The bottom and the side facing the wall are tucked, and then the other sides are out.         

4: Have you ever stolen a street sign before?  No??? (though when I was little I did take those little flags that marked underground wires)         

5: Do you like to use post-it notes?  I literally keep them in my purse and they’re all over my computer.            

6: Do you cut out coupons but then never use them? I haven’t seen a coupon since 2008.              

7: Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees? Bees, I think, maybe… uh…depends how concentrated the swarm is, otherwise I might try the bear.             

8: Do you have freckles?  No, though when I was little I was super jealous of everyone that did.              

9: Do you always smile for pictures? Yes, though sometimes I wish I didn’t

10:What is your biggest pet peeve? Lying or speaking in a condescending tone (though I have a lot of things that really bug me)

11: Do you ever count your steps when you walk?  If I actually walked I might          

12:Have you ever peed in the woods?  When I was really little I had to once in the woods on the side of a highway             

13:What about pooped in the woods? No, thank goodness (though I used a toilet paper-less outhouse that didn’t have a door)              

14:Do you ever dance even if theres no music playing? All the time              

15:Do you chew your pens and pencils? When I was little I’d bite ‘em in half. I more hold them than chew on them now though              

16: How many people have you slept with this week? My sister shares my room with me 4 days a week. (I know what this question is asking and I’m not going to acknowledge it)

17:  What size is your bed? Twin. It’s literally the same bed I’ve had since I was 5  (someone gave it to us, so it’s like 20+ years old)            

18: What is your Song of the week?  Dernière danse by Indila            

19: Is it okay for guys to wear pink? Yeah, depending how it’s worn (like some guys can really make a hot pink button up work if you have the right tie)             

20: Do you still watch cartoons? *shoves all my voltron fanart under a rug* hmm?  yes, i do. it’s pretty much all i watch      

21:  Whats your least favorite movie? I watched my Sister’s Keeper once with some friends, and I didn’t like it (though I’m sure I’ve seen worse). I don’t care for movies with horror or a lot of people screaming/being disrespectful             

22:Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some? Probably the pile of clothes I have stuffed in my drawer              

23: If you’re a girl, bra size? If you’re a guy, pants size? yeah i’m a 34b-ack off    

24:What do you dip a chicken nugget in?  Sweet and sour / polynesian sauce            

25: What is your favorite food? I really like my mom’s lentil burgers, at the same time, french fries call my name, and chocolate shakes…              

26: What movies could you watch over and over and still love?  Mm, maybe Lady and the Tramp, Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings, can’t think of the others           

27: Last person you kissed/kissed you? I mean, some guy kissed my forehead once (which I’d like to forget), but I’ve never had a real kiss before             

28: Were you ever a boy/girl scout?  I wish though I was in missionettes             

29: Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?             

30: When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?  I sent a birthday card with a message last month does that count? otherwise i think i was 9  

31: Can you change the oil on a car? I mean I can check it and put oil in it, but not a full oil change             

32:Ever gotten a speeding ticket? No, but I usually don’t speed (unless I stop paying attention and start actually driving at the speed every one else is)              

33:Ever ran out of gas?  Nope             

34: Favorite kind of sandwich?  Tuna salad or chicken salad sandwich             

35:  Best thing to eat for breakfast?  Scrambled eggs with ham, bacon, butter n biscuit, banana nectar, a bit of green pepper, maybe a sausage, too             

36: What is your usual bedtime?  My what? (i wish i had one TvT)             

37:Are you lazy?  A little bit. I’m trying to work on it            

38:When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?  I’ve never been Trick-or-Treating

39: What is your Chinese astrological sign? The Rat

40: Are you horny?             

41:  Do you have any magazine subscriptions?    Nope          

42: Which are better legos or lincoln logs? Legos but gosh i haven’t seen lincoln logs since i was 7               

43:Are you stubborn?  Depends on what it is. Moral-wise, absolutely, but if it’s where to eat I’ll just go with the flow. Also no horror movies, I’ll put my foot down on that             

44:  Who is better…Leno or Letterman?  I have no idea who these people are             

45:Ever watch soap operas?  Kind of? Are all romantic dramas soap operas? Because I watched a couple of romance dramas              

46: Are you afraid of heights?  Buddy, I can’t even stand on a chair without getting dizzy            

47:Do you sing in the car? Oh, I belt out songs like no tomorrow in the car. The louder the better.          

48: Do you sing in the shower? If I’m not asleep I’m singing, let’s put it that way (and even then…)  

49:  Do you dance in the car?  Wait…people…people don’t do this?            

50: Ever used a gun? Yep! A .22 and a 9mm           

51: Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?  Dude, I don’t even have graduation photos…             

52:Do you think musicals are cheesy?  Sometimes (other times I’m floored by how well done they are) but at the same time, if they are cheesy,  isn’t that part of the fun?             

53:  Is Christmas stressful?  Absolutely. Or at least the way we do it now, it is             

54: Ever eat a pierogi?  I’ve never even heard of them TvT  OH! they look like pot stickers! love pot stickers!  

55: Favorite type of fruit pie? mmm either apple or pumpkin              

56: Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? Doctor and ballerina (I think spy at some point too)           

57:Do you believe in ghosts? Spirits of the dearly-departed wandering the earth as either punishment or to fulfill some last regrets? Nah.              

58: Ever have a Deja-vu feeling? ALL. THE. TIME.               

59: Take a vitamin daily? Yep gummy vitamins ftw              

60:  Wear slippers? I would if my dog didn’t try to tear off the pom-poms every time I walk out with them on         

61:Wear a bath robe?  Yep, an old green and blue hand-me-down that I adore             

62: What do you wear to bed? Soft shorts and one of my dad’s old graphic-tees             

63:  First concert?  I’m just going to say it was a show that my dad did when I was about 5, because I can’t remember the first one that had an admission fee             

64: Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?  Probably Wal-Mart, though if I’m closer to Target, I’ll go there            

65: Nike or Adidas?  *points at shoes* Eso son reebok, o son nike?  (idk my shoes are new balance i just wear what feels good and is cheap)           

66: Cheetos Or Fritos?  I don’t even remember what Fritos taste like             

67:  Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?  I’m going to go with sunflower seeds             

68:Ever hear of the group Tres Bien? Well now I have, lol  oh hey they started in clearwater, fl        

69:Ever take dance lessons? I wish. Though I had a dance dvd when I was younger for basic ballet exercises. When I had the chance to go, my parents insisted I take Karate instead (which I loved, but still a part of me wishes I could have taken dance)             

70: Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? Buddy, I can’t even picture married life, I feel like I’m going to die the crazy old lady on the corner that doesn’t know when to stop talking about her plants (maybe a scholarly-type guy though)             

71:Can you curl your tongue? Yes, and I love being able to because for some reason babies find it fascinating               

72: Ever won a spelling bee? I was homeschooled, so I’ve never been in one               

73: Have you ever cried because you were so happy? Yeah, someone gave me a hug once. Also when I went to St. Augustine and thought it was so pretty I started crying. Did the same at a chapel (it was made as an art piece, and had mind-blowing mosaic work)             

74: Own any record albums? Not personally, but we have them at home              

75:Own a record player? Yep, we have a family one              

76: Regularly burn incense?  I have…candles?             

77:  Ever been in love? With a real person?  No.              

78: Who would you like to see in concert? I honestly have no idea              

79: What was the last concert you saw?  I think it was  “The Orchestra”, which is essentially the remaining band members of ELO.           

80:  Hot tea or cold tea?  Hot tea. Hot tea all the way.             

81:Tea or coffee? Honestly depends what I’m in the mood for, but usually tea            

82:Sugar or snickerdoodles? Sugar              

83: Can you swim well?  If I fell into a calm pond I could probably survive, let’s put it that way             

84: Can you hold your breath without holding your nose? Yep              

85:  Are you patient? Thanks to 3 younger siblings that are constantly trying it, I am               

86:DJ or band, at a wedding? Probably a DJ, but a band would be so sweet              

87: Ever won a contest? I won a game of skiball against some people (got a toy gator) and then won a Disney Trivia quiz, but I can’t think of an official contest I won            

88: Ever have plastic surgery? Nope              

89:Which are better black or green olives? How about neither?              

90: Can you knit or crochet? No, but it’s on my bucket list of things to learn             

91: Best room for a fireplace?  Probably the family room, though living room and a lanai work well, too.            

92:  Do you want to get married? I think so              

93: If married, how long have you been married? n/a              

94: Who was your HS crush? Didn’t have one

95:  Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way? Some people??? Are??? Mature???? And??? Communicate??? Civilly???  (no i don’t throw fits)

  96:Do you have kids? No, but I deal with 3 younger siblings and a dog

 97: Do you want kids? I have mixed feelings about it, but I think so  

98: Whats your favorite color? Pretty sure it’s green, but I love pinks, blues, and purples too, or a nice rich orange               

99: Do you miss anyone right now? My grandfather, and parts of myself               

[tensify]

10 Seconds {Soulmate! Ten}

Pairing: Ten X Reader

Genre: Teeny tiny bit of angst?; fluff; Soulmate! AU; bulleted scenario

Word Count: 1606

Summary: You had four years to find your soulmate, but now time is running out.

in this au people have timers on their wrist to let them know how much time they have until they find their soulmate 

a person is given a certain amount of time to find their soulmate before their time runs out 

the timer stops when you find your soulmate

most people find their soulmates before the timer runs out 

no one actually knows what happens to those who don't find their soulmate, because it's so rare

people made conspiracy theories on those who don't find their soulmate 

a majority of people believe that they die

some believe that nothing happens, that they have never meet their soulmate and never be truly happy 

and some believe that your timer restarts and you get a new soulmate, but you would never be as happy with them than as your first soulmate 

the timer showed up for you when you were 16

it said you had four years to find your soulmate 

this made super worried because most of your friends had like 8-10 years to find their soulmate 

but you had to find yours when you were 20 

flash forward a couple of years, you're now 20 

your timer said you had 1 month, 2 weeks, 4 days, 28 minutes, and 33 seconds left 

even though you had more than a month left, you were getting stressed

even your friends who had 10 years to find their soulmate, already found theirs 

you watched them be happy together while you just sulked thinking how it could be you and your soulmate, but you haven't met them yet 

you felt like you were never going to meet your soulmate and you would end up being being that rare case 

you told all your friends that if in a month they didn't see you, it's because you were dead 

your friends did not take that joke as a laughing matter 

they tried to push you to go out with them so it would be easier to find your soulmate 

but you always refused bc you were a broke college student who needed to study and work 

your friends always nagged you for not doing anything fun and to get out to find your soulmate  

you just ignored them and shoved your face in textbooks 

on the days you're not studying, you're working at a restaurant as a waitress 

nowadays it felt like you were working more than studying 

the restaurant was blooming with new customers and was always busy so workers were always needed 

you wish you could take days off so you could try and find your soulmate but your boss just won't let you 

stupid boss  

soon enough, your stupid timer was telling you had a week left

your anxiety level was off the radar 

you didn't know how you could meet your soulmate if you were always working 

your co-workers told you maybe you'd meet them at the restaurant 

but you doubted everything everyone told you 

"nah, they'd probably eat somewhere else. our food isn't that great"

now it's the day you're supposed to meet your soulmate before you "die"

you kept asking your boss if you could step outside for a few minutes in case you could run into them on the street

your boss kept telling you no and to not ask again 

a few hours later, you come back to your boss BEGGING him if he could let you step outside for just a moment 

this led to a small argument between you and your boss 

you watched your timer nervously as it said you had two minutes left 

and yet you were still here arguing with your boss 

"why won't you just let me step outside for just a moment!" 

"because you're at work!!!" "I need to meet them! You know what it's like to have a soulmate!" 

The man continues to yell at you bc he's bitter that his soulmate passed away recently

apparently you don't deserve happiness because his soulmate got into an accident 

"why you so salty man" 

your boss is totally done with you 

he tells you, "if you step out that door, you're fired. So you can either serve the group of guys over there or you can lose your job, choose your pick" 

you looked down at your wrist again and so you had a minute and fifteen seconds left 

you couldn't afford to lose this job, it was your only way of living while in college

and even if you don’t meet your soulmate, there was the slight chance that you wouldn’t die

with a sinking heart, you walked over to the table with a large group of boys 

you wanted to cry 

you were so disappointed that you wouldn't meet your soulmate 

your biggest fear was coming true 

when you walked over to the table you had fifty five seconds left

"hello, I am y/n and I'll be your server today, what can I start you off with?" You said in the most depressing voice

you noticed in the corner that there was a boy staring at his wrist, looking unhappy 

the boy sitting next to him, patted him on the back, saying he was sorry and that he really thought this would be the place 

but oblivious you, didn't even think about what just happened

you were just kinda too upset with how you were feeling

the boy in the corner who you didn't get a glimpse of yet because his face was facing down, was the last to order 

each time someone placed an order, you looked down at your wrist 

you saw it go down to twenty, nineteen, eighteen, seventeen 

you just watched the seconds drop, your heart sinking each time 

the boy in the corner started to speak, and you looked up at him 

part of you wished he was your soulmate because first off, he was hella cute, and second, you had ten seconds left

as you wrote down his order on your notepad, you looked at your wrist again and saw that it was no longer counting down 

you were left in pure shock 

it WAS A MIRACLE 

you couldn't believe it 

you were so happy, to see the number ten you literally shouted it

everyone at the table exchanged confused looks 

because the weird monotone sad looking waitress was grinning ear to ear yelling out "ten"

no one knew what was happening except for that boy in the corner 

he started to stand up, and before you could speak you pointed at him and yelled, "TEN!" 

because you were so happy that your timer stopped at ten seconds, ten was your new favorite number, there was nothing you could think about except for the number ten 

you even forgot to think about your soulmate standing right there in front of you, so you just go "ten, I love you" because you don’t know his name

and he totally thinks you're crazy but he's loving every minute of it because it's adorable 

he jokes saying, "my name is chittaphon" 

"your name is ten now" you say 

and that's how the nickname ten came to be

NOW TIME FOR TEN AS A BOYFRIEND

he would be the sweetest

you ever see that episode of nct life where him and jaehyun were cuddling?

yeah, ten would be so cuddly

daily cuddle sessions

during a cuddle session sometimes you guys wouldn’t speak at all, and sometimes he asks you strange questions

“have you ever collected the stickers on fruits?”

“if a fork was made out of gold, would it still be considered silverware?”

eventually, he asks you, “how come you can call me ten, but I can’t call you ten?”

you don’t really know the answer but you know that the name, ten, suits him more than it could ever fit you

not only did you guys meet with ten seconds left, he’s also a ten out of ten

you like to say you scored pretty big

one day he asks you what you think would’ve happened if you hadn’t met

you say you don’t know, because you were always too worried about not meeting him instead of imagining of possible scenarios that could happen if you hadn’t

he tells you that he thinks we could’ve died

because he would die if he didn’t have you

cheesy, i know

but you guys would go on so many dates

he was the only one able to convince you to take a break from studying or working

i mean, how could you say no to him?

he whined and begged for you to say yes and it was just too cute

and dating ten meant a special friend would tag along

and by special friend, I mean Johnny

he was the third wheel on every date

but sometimes it felt like you were actually the third wheel

but it was all good because the three of you had fun with each other

AND MEETING TEN’S FAMILY

you love them so much and they love you just as much

ten’s mom sending you his baby pictures

you and his sister joining forces and teasing him 

I think I’m running out of things to write

sometimes he practices dancing with you there

you get mesmerized by his dancing

then you try to do the moves yourself and end up failing miserably

he tries to teach you, but no matter what you do, dancing is not your thing

you guys love each other a whole lot

there is no one else you’d rather be with

you guys are couple goals according to everyone else

happy in love :’)

masterlist

lol I didn’t edit this so sorry if it sucked, if anyone reads this let me know if I should write more stuff like this :)

[lordofassgard]

Derek Hale As A Father

Requested: | yes | no |

Pairing: Derek Hale x f!Reader

Summary: Derek as a dad according to my weird head

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings: cuteness

A/N: This is based on a very weird dream that I had 😂 Also BRETT DESERVED BETTER HE WAS MY FAV AND I’M ANGRY AF         And can we talk about Nolan? I know he’s a lil bit of a psycopath but those nose freckles are so cute and I can’t really hate him props to Froy Gutierrez for the amazing acting skills

check navigation for masterlist

Pregnancy and going into labor

When you tell him he’s scared at first thinking that he’s not ready for a child. What if he’s not good enough? What if something happens to him and the child has to grow up without a dad? What if someone makes your child a target because of him?

But after you assured him like two hundred times that he’s going to be a great dad and nothing is going to happen because the pack is there to protect the child, he accepts the idea

He actually gets really happy, he smiles and laughs

And fuck what a sight

You go to the doctors right away to see if everything is okay

The pack is thrilled

Lydia starts to plan shopping sprees for the baby

He growls at everyone who is too close to you

You can’t even lift a finger, he does everything

It gets kind of annoying because pregnancy is not a disease

“I don’t see the point of having a baby shower…”

“Because it’s fun. C’mon Derek don’t be such a sour wolf”

“Then why is he here?”

“Peter is your uncle.”

You guys don’t want to know the gender of your baby, you want it to be a surprise

The pack places bets

Scott, Lydia and Mason bet on girl

Malia, Liam and Stiles bet on boy

“Are you betting on my child?”

He doesn’t really know what to do about your mood swings but he tries his best

Like he’s really confused

One minute you’re angry, the other you’re crying and then you start laughing

He gets disgusted af with your cravings

Bc let’s be honest you wouldn’t eat that shit unless your hormones were all crazy

Which they are

But if you’re craving ice cream at 2am and it’s raining cats and dogs Derek still goes out to buy you ice cream

If you take up the whole bed, it’s fine he sleeps on the couch he doesn’t mind

Foot rubs

Back rubs

Wearing his shirts because your clothes are starting to get tight

Peter is not allowed to be alone in a room with you

“Derek do we have Nutella?”

“No, (Y/N) the book I read says that you should eat fruit. Do you want an orange?”

“Derek, which one of us is going to have to give birth to a werewolf baby? It’s me, I don’t want any goddamn oranges I want Nutella!”

Late night talks about your baby’s future

Derek talks to your belly when he thinks you’re asleep

“I don’t know if you can hear me but I just want you to know that I’ll always be here for you. No matter what”

He carries you everywhere

The smile that lights up his face when the baby kicks for the first time

But then it gets painful

“Derek tell your child to stop kicking me, I can’t sleep”

Whenever you feel insecure he reassures you that you’re still beautiful

Having the pack over a lot

Everyone is always listening to yours and the baby’s hearthbeat just in case

Painting the baby’s room together

Which ends up with you two painting each other instead of the walls

Your waters break in the middle of the night

You try not to freak out as you wake up Derek and tell him that the baby is coming

He is  f r e a k i n g  o u t  but he tries to stay calm because of you

You guys are quick to leave the loft and drive to the hospital

When you get there you realize that you don’t have your maternity bag

Derek wants to go back to get the but you want him to stay

And although it’s 3am and he still calls Scott to get the bag from the loft

Contractions are a bitch

Especially with a baby werewolf

You have to wait a few hours before you start pushing

You only start pushing at dawn

Derek is by your side holding your hand and lowkey taking your pain away without the doctors seeing it

Forget the pain of contractions

Pushing is worse

Even with Derek taking your pain it still hurts

You cuss him out while your pushing

“FUCK YOU HALE I DON’T WANT ANY MORE KIDS I’M GONNA CUT YOUR DICK OFF!!!”

He just agrees because what else can he do?

But everyone knows that’s a lie because the baby making process is really fun especially when it’s with Derek Hale am I right?

Finally after three hours of pushing you finally hear a tiny cry

And all those hours of pain are worth it

Derek kisses you happily as he mumbles how much he loves you

The first time he held your baby he cried

Then you cried

Everyone cried

If it were a boy

Okay I can’t get over the fact that Derek would buy a leather jacket to match his own

Stuffed wolves because you’re that cliche

He’s the one who gets up in the middle of the night when the baby cries

As soon as your son starts to crawl he just leaves the room so quickly that Derek panics for a few seconds before he hears a giggle in the other room

And he starts doing it on purpose

He takes after Derek

Basically you have a tiny version of Derek walking around

Big green eyes just like his father

And as soon as he can walk, your son just walks away from you like he doesn’t know you

He likes picking on Stiles too

He bites him, drools on him and the lil shit still laughs

Derek is sooooo proud

That little frown when someone picks him up after he walks away

He eats a lot

The only thing he takes after you is your clumsiness

He bumps into everything

He trips over nothing

His first word is “no”

He said after Stiles told him to stop biting him

Derek teaches your son how to play basketball

“Derek why are you taking him to the woods?”

“Because he needs to learn”

“Derek, he’s two”

Sometimes you walk in on them sleeping, your son curled up on Derek’s chest

Your son is very sarcastic at an early age

“Stiles is a bad influence on him, (Y/N)”

“He learned it from you Derek”

They team up to prank you

Crying on the first day of school

Derek cries, you don’t

You help him with his homework

As a girl you teach him how to treat a girl’s heart

Or a boy’s heart

Really you don’t really care as long as your son his happy

You accept whatever career he chooses because you just want him to do what he likes

“Dad, stop I’m 17”

 If it were a girl 

She cries a lot as a baby

Derek found out the only way for her to stop crying is when he flashes his blue orbs at her

Her favorite uncle is Scott

Probably it was because of the red eyes

Werewolf things you know? Can’t relate to that

When she starts to crawl she hides

And she’s tiny so she fits everywhere

It’s hard to find her sometimes

Lowkey Derek is proud because as a werewolf if she can hide she’ll be fine

It takes her a while to start walking but when she does she never wants to sit still

She loves when Derek holds her tiny hands to help her up

Her first word is “Lucky” the name of your dog

Actually it was more like “Wucky”

And she’d have Derek wrapped around her little finger

Whatever she wanted, he’d give it to her

“Derek you’re spoiling her”

“No, I’m not” *silence* “Okay maybe I am but I can’t say no to her”

Play dates would include Scott and Derek sitting on her bedroom floor with tiaras and tutus sipping tea

Also you and Stiles by the door laughing your asses off

If she wanted to do Derek’s make up, you can bet that Derek is going to have lipstick on his teeth and eyeshadow up to his forehead

Maybe a sticker or two on his forehead

“How do I look?”

“You look gorgeous hun”

Since she couldn’t braid their hairs, she’d try to braid yours or Lydia’s

But that wouldn’t stop her from doing weird ponytails on them

Then she’d take advantage of Liam when he grew his hair a bit

I feel like Derek would raise is daughter to be a badass

And she doesn’t take shit from anyone

She’s a Hale, she was born done with everybody’s shit

She has the same scowl as Derek

Overprotective Derek when she’s old enough to date

But she knows what she’s doing

How many times have you opened the door to a teenage boy with flowers?

a lot

Derek’s overprotectiveness gets a little too much

“She’s kissing him outside on the front porch!”

“Derek, she’s 23 she can do what she wants!”

feedback is appreciated :) i’d link my ask box but tumblr is a dick

[cianmars]

#10 for the domesticity prompts for Red Snowing? (Because I am trash for this family and it is your fault.)

You sent this in like 8 days ago and I know it’s only supposed to be short but like I have no self control and you should know that by now..... here’s Number 10 - the in-laws come to visit.

I’ve done it so it’s Regina and Robin visiting them for dinner at the behest of Henry, who’s wanting to have a meal with his step-sister (which is weird considering their grandmother/grandson relationship in canon) and her family, and introduce them to his fiancée.Henry- 23Roland- 21Robyn’s now Rowan - 19They also adopted two kids they used to foster but neither will feature in this - Matthew and Kai who are both 17. 

Neal- 18Tyler - 16Emma- 2 (just.)

Fanfiction.net

David sat on the side of the sandpit in the park as Emma played. A little while after Emma had been born he decided he wanted to be a stay at home dad, he and his wives had talked it over and found it worked out perfectly for them all especially as Emma seemed to be the clingiest to him, he had taken to it like a duck to water. 

As Emma had to have regular check ups at the hospital they knew full well that Emma hated the hospital visits, David figured that if he could at least wear the two year old out a little it wouldn't be quite as bad, at least that was what he was hoping but she was so much more stubborn than he could remember either of her brothers being so the hope wasn't exactly massive. 

“Tap the top of this bit, Koala.” He helped her pat the top of the bucket before he pulled it off and showed Emma the sandcastle underneath. “Wow! Look at that, your very own castle.” 

“Yay!” Emma cheered, before a mischievous look appeared on her face, she hit the castle knocking it down. “Uh oh.”

David chuckled and tickled her sides. “Uh oh indeed.” He spotted Ruby walking up to them ready to go to the hospital with them for Emma’s checkup. “Sickness bug?”

“And here I was thinking I looked nice today.” She sat down and Emma immediately started to climb onto her lap. “Hey, pup.”

“You look as beautiful as you do every day.” David wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her into a deep kiss, the boys had long since decided that their parents being in love was the most embarrassing thing possible, but they still had a few more years before Emma started to complain. “No, just an idea, I mean no one wants to catch the sickness bug and Snow said that they’re meant to be visiting Peanut at college... Regina won't want to visit us if there’s a chance they’ll be too ill to go.”

“She’s nineteen, nearly twenty, I doubt Rowan would appreciate you still calling her Peanut.” Ruby smirked. “Anyway, do you really think that Snow would let us?”

David sighed, he sent Emma a happy smile when she looked at him, but as soon as she looked away to play in the sand again he sent Ruby a pout. “It’s alright for you, Regina hates me, I swear she thinks I’m gonna break one of the kids somehow!”

Ruby sniggered. “In her defence, you did get her stepdaughter pregnant, before the age of twenty...” She distracted Emma from trying to taste the sand by moulding a fish. “Wow, look, a Dory fishy!”

“If I remember correctly, you were there for the baby making part too.” He smirked.

“Mama, Nemo, no Dory! ” 

“Oh my apologies, pup, of course that’s Nemo!” She feigned a sincere apology before looking back at David. “Yeah, but Regina knows basic biology... and I don’t have the parts.”

“Well, I can certain attest to that.” David remarked with a flirty smirk. “Neal’s eighteen now, he’s technically an adult, when’s she gonna let it go?”

“...Maybe when Em’s forty.”

David gently pulled Emma into his arms, wiping the sand off of her overalls, he hugged her close. “Nope, you’re never going to grow up are you, Emmy? Just be my little girl forever, you won't be a traitor and grow up like Ty and Nee, will you?”

“Nee’s big, big, big.” Emma nodded her head in agreement though she didn't understand what he meant. They were still getting her to understand that Neal would be moving out the next year, to go to college, they knew it was really going to upset her. 

Ruby chuckled and kissed the top of Emma’s crazy blonde curls. “You’re very right, babe. How about daddy gets you into your stroller then we can walk to go get mommy?”

“Okay.” Emma smiled but then the smile faltered. “Go the doctor?”

“We do, pup,” she said, as David strapped the wiggling toddler into the stroller, “but it’s okay you know it’s easy, plus you get some stickers.”

“Stickers?”

“Stickers.” Ruby confirmed tucking Emma’s blanket around her before kissing her nose.

“Okay mama.” She started to play with a couple of the toys they still had attached to the stroller.

“Maybe I could give Regina a sticker every time she’s nice to me.”

Ruby linked arms with David as he started to push the stroller. “So, you’ll only need to borrow two of Emma’s stickers?”

“You’re curiously optimistic today.” David joked, as they walked towards Snow’s school, where they’d all drive to the hospital together. 

“One, two, three!” 

“That’s my very clever girl, Emma.” Snow praised as they walked down the hospital corridor after having seen the doctor. Emma had now stopped crying after being given her vaccinations, Emma decided to half skip-half run down the corridor, in the sight of her parents.“You do have three stickers. Sweetie, come hold my hand please or one of us will carry you, it’s going to be busier in a minute we don't want to lose you.”

“You could distract Snow, and I’ll find a red felt tip, we’ll claim Emma has the chickenpox.” David suggested quietly, coming up with another plan like they had been while they had been waiting for Emma’s appointment (Ruby out of bored and David out of a genuine need for a plan), but not quietly enough that his other wife didn't hear. 

“David.” Snow turned on him, with Emma in her arms, looking stern. “You are not lying to Regina to get her not to come.”

“...Snow-”

“-No. I know you two don't always get along, especially when you have to spend several hours together when none of the kids are ill or there’s not a family event of some form, and I appreciate it, I do - I know she’s hard on you even if she doesn't really mean it. But we’ve not seen Henry for a while, and he’s only going to visit us less now that he’s settled down in Seattle, and next year Neal will be gone, he’ll be hours away. How long until we all get to just meet up for a meal again?”

Emma looked up at them with apt attention. “Uncle Henry?”

David felt bad all of a sudden, he knew that family was important to all of them especially Snow, it was only when Neal was born that she and Regina had become close after almost a decade. “Yeah, kiddo, we’re gonna see uncle Henry, uncle Henry’s girlfriend, grandpa, and grandma.” He leant down and tenderly and lovingly kissed Snow. “I’m sorry, Snow.”

Snow placed her hand onto David’s chest. “It’s okay, you know she doesn't really hate you, right? She just... acts like she does...”

“Sure...” David said dubiously before he laughed and took Emma from Snow’s arms. “You want to ride on my shoulders to the car?” He asked, he knew she wouldn't be quite as happy when the shots came into full effect, so he wanted her to be happy for as long as possible. 

“Daddy horsey.” Emma said holding onto his hair as David carefully kept hold of her on his shoulders. 

Ruby and Snow both laughed as Davidstarted to gallop down the corridor clearly not caring about what anyone would think of him. Ruby slipped her hand through Snow’s andpulled her into a kiss, before they resumed walking, Ruby swinging their joinedhands. 

“What’re you thinking?” Snow asked knowing full well that her wife was startingto plan something in her mind.

“Wouldn’t you like to know.” Rubysmirked.

Snow rolled her eyes and pulled theirhands up to her lips to kiss Ruby’s. “What’re you thinking?” She asked again.

“Well, I know that the kids love ourtrips away from the town, the further away the better, but maybe we should go somewherenew… and, well, we always wanted to go to England, maybe we could go to London forspring break.” It was a trip they had talked about since the three of them had gotten together as teenagers, then Snow had fallen pregnant, and there had just never seemed to be a right time.

Snow beamed and stopped in thedoorway leading outside where David and Emma were, she gave Ruby another kiss,this time a lingering one. It was hard for all of them, getting used to thefact that Neal would be leaving them in under a year, it only became moreapparent when Henry had chosen to settle on the other side of the country, hewas only five years older than Neal.“Have I told you that I love you?”

“Not yet today.” Ruby couldn’t resistkissing her again, she could still taste some fruit tea Snow must have dranknot too long before they had picked her up from the school, her lips were assoft as they had been when they had first fallen in love as mere teenagers. “ButI’m sure you can make up for that.”

“Neal!” David called through as he and his wives moved around the kitchen putting together the meal and desserts, Emma was balanced on his hip clinging onto him, the shots side effects starting - really it would have been better if either the shots or the meal had been a different day, but such was life. 

His eldest son appeared in the kitchen doorway. Freshly showered after his swim practice and changed into a turquoise shirt which brought out the brightest blue hues of his irises, he had already dried and styled his hair so that there were no hints of any of the curls which had been present in his wet hair, yet he continued to run his hand through his dark locks to make sure it was sitting right. ”What’s up, dad?”

“Can you quickly get your little sister changed while me and your moms sort out dinner? I know Ty’s in the shower so he can watch her while we all get changed.”

“Sure.” Neal shrugged. “Hey, Emmy, let’s go get you changed.” Neal went to take Emma but she squirmed away and held tighter to David. 

“No! Want daddy.”

David sighed and kissed her head. “Sweetie, I promise I’ll hold you again as soon as we’re all changed.” He felt her hold even tighter and just whine in response. “You can wear your Dino onesie, I’m sure Uncle Henry would love to see that, you can show him how you can roar really loudly.”

Snow caught sight of Emma’s face and knew she was close to crying or a tantrum, but that wasn't her fault, she walked over and kissed Emma’s forehead. She sent a look to Ruby who nodded and grabbed the baby medicine from the cupboard, she, too, kissed the top of Emma’s head as she passed it over. 

“Okay, baby, you can stay with daddy.” Snow soothed, measuring out the syringe of medicine for Emma, and getting it ready to give to her daughter. “You’re a little warm, sweetie, open up please, it’s the cherry one.”

Luckily Emma had decided not to refuse to take it and just opened her mouth. She still pulled a face at the medicine but didn't spit it out which was a plus. “Stay daddy?” Emma asked them quietly.

“Yes, you can stay with daddy,” Snow said without pause, “he’ll get you changed into your onesie, you’ll be comfiest in that.” She had planned for Emma  to wear something bit smarter than that but her toddler’s comfort came first. “Neal, can you help in here, please?” 

“Sure.” Neal shrugged as David carried Emma out of the room, he rolled up his sleeves and wandered over to the kitchen counters where delicious food had been made or was in the process of being made. “Erm, mom, mama? You guys realise that it’s only us, Grandma, Grandpa, Henry and Ella... right?” 

Ruby smirked, she had clearly already had this conversation, she looked amused as Snow gave her polished answer.

“It gives us variety, it’s kind of like a potluck/ banquet style,” Snow answered as she opened the oven to check on the lemon roasted chicken with its chorizo stuffing, “there’s meat and vegetarian options and starters, a couple of mains, and desserts.”

“Ah... so you’re planning on scaring her off by over feeding her?” He joked looking at the desserts, which David had made during Emma’s morning nap, he had to admit that they looked just as delicious as the whole house smelt.

Ruby snorted with laughter. “Yup.” she said at the same time that Snow said -

“You are so like your father... and your mother.”

Neal just shot her a charming smile but didn't deny the allegations, nor did Ruby, they all knew that they three kids were three perfect mixes of the three parents. “What’d you need mom?” 

Snow looked at the mess of pots around the kitchen. “Erm... can you please put the desserts into the refrigerator, then take the carrots off the heat, drain them then add a knob of butter to them, thanks honey.”

Ruby took hold of Snow’s hands when she saw how frantic her wife was looking. 

“Rubes? What’s wrong? I need to -”

“Snow.” Ruby said firmly gaining her attention. “It’s all okay, she’s going to love us, it’s not how it used to be like when we were younger, and there’s no way Henry would end up with someone bigoted, and he especially wouldn't let her around the kids.”

Snow took a shaky breath and nodded her head. She knew she was being a little silly, but she remembered what it was like when polyamory was only just becoming accepted, she remembered the fear of having to come out as both bisexual and in a polyamorous relationship, and watching the loves of her life having to do the same. She watched David’s step-father decide it was enough to fully and completely disown him, influencing David’s twin in becoming estranged from him at the same time, David’s mother fully accepted them and was happy for David, but she had died shortly after their wedding. Granny hadn’t really minded, she could tell that they were in love, but when her mother had decided to suddenly make an appearance in Ruby’s life she had tried to force Ruby to choose between them - she had blamed Snow for Ruby’s choice, they hadn't seen her since either. Snow supposed it was good that Regina had accepted their relationship, not that they had really been close before then plus she kind of hated David for a while there, but she knew full well that her father would never have approved of any of it. “I know. I just...”

Ruby placed her hands on Snow’s cheeks, green eyes looking into green eyes, a shared past and struggles. “I know.” Snow’s hands came up to hold onto hers against her face. “It’s all been worth it though, right?”

Snow smiled full of love for her wife. There wasn't a single thing they’d change, they all had each other and their children, the price was worth it. “Of course.” She pulled Ruby down to quickly kiss her. 

“Eww.” 

Ruby and Snow broke apart as Tyler came skidding into the kitchen dressed in a similar outfit to Neal, just his shirt was a darker denim with a t-shirt underneath, and complained immediately. “Mama, I’m hungr-” He started to whine before he spotted the sheer amount of food in the kitchen. “You know that Matty and Kai are still on that geography trip... right? Are Rowan and Roland coming as well?”

Ruby watched Snow bite her lip, as she looked at the food, and Neal laugh as he sorted out the carrots. She tried not to smirk for her wife’s sake. “Well, you definitely won't still be hungry after a three course meal.” She simply pointed out to their younger son as David walked back in with Emma in his arms, the pair changed into clean clothes, Emma into a dinosaur onesie and David into a deep blue shirt and slacks. “But first you can come with me to pick up some wine.”

“Sure,” Ty quickly threw on his trademark leather jacket he was almost never seen without, “so long as I’m not having to help cook, at least that way I cant be blamed for anything going wrong.”

“Beer please.” David called as Ruby said bye to Snow, he leant down to peck her on the lips when she went over to him. 

“No class.” Ruby teased knowing that neither he or Robin drank wine if they could avoid it.

“This coming from someone who likes a drink which tastes like vinegar.” He winked. 

Ruby just rolled her eyes and gave Emma a kiss goodbye. “I’ll be back soon baby.” She promised before calling over to their first born. “Bye Nee.”

“See ya mama.” Neal called back over, as he leant against the counter, now texting his friends.

David wrapped his spare arm around Snow, who leant against him, Emma rested her face against her mom’s. 

“I went a little overboard.” Snow admitted quietly. 

“So we’ll just have some leftovers,” David shrugged his shoulders showing that it wasn't a big deal, “we’ll go on a picnic with the kids with some of it, though the boys will probably have eaten it by tomorrow morning.” 

Snow smiled at David’s talent of making her feel at ease. She gently moved Emma’s head away from her and onto David’s shoulder, so she could kiss her husband. “I love you.”

David’s mouth smiled against hers. “I love you more.” 

“Love you mommy.” 

Snow giggled at Emma feeling the need to join in. “And I love you, my brave, brave, baby.” Snow nuzzled her nose against hers. “Mommy’s going to go put on a pretty dress-”

“Red.”

Snow smiled Emma didn't know the names of too many colours so it was a fairly high chance out of all the colours Emma could have chosen it would have been that one. “Okay, I’ll wear a red one. Do you want to come with me or are you going to help daddy and Nealy?”

“I help.” 

“Aw.” Snow let slip out, Emma’s certain tone and look was adorable on a toddler so young, especially with Emma’s now red little face and blankie clutched in her hand. “Okay Emmy, you help, I’ll see you in a minute.”

Soon Snow was dressed in a classic red dress. As Emma drank her sippy cup, and ‘supervised’ Neal and David setting the table, Ruby and Tyler returned with the drinks which they put in fridge to chill, before Ruby went to change into a shirt the same shade as Snow’s dress and black leather pants.

Soon enough the doorbell rang, Emma was still being clingy but with a little more energy than she had before thanks to the medicine working its magic. Snow shot up to answer the door, Tyler quickly followed her with Neal trailing behind trying to look unbothered. Emma’s head shot up towards the doorway as she heard voices, she pointed towards the doorway and the source of the noise as she, David, and Ruby stayed on the couch. “Daddy? Doooor.” 

Ruby and David laughed as she dragged out the word as the boys usually did when they were trying to get other people to answer the door. “I know, Koala, mommy’s got it.”

Emma nodded her head before looking at Ruby. “Mama, mommy’s door.” 

Ruby smiled at her daughter’s need to inform her that Snow had gotten the door, she thought it was sweet Emma’s insistence to make sure no one was left out, of activities or knowledge. She was also pretty sure Emma had forgotten who was coming around. “Maybe it’s a tiger coming to dinner.” She teased.

“No mama.” Emma giggled, her nose wrinkled up as she did so, suddenly her eyes widened and her laughing smile changed to her surprised but bright one. “Grandma! Grandpa!” She shouted happily, she scrambled to stand up on David’s lap.

“Careful, sweetheart, we don't want you to fall off your daddy’s lap.” She scooped her and shot David a glare as she cuddled Emma close to her chest. 

“It’s lovely to see you too Regina.” David rolled his eyes.

Ruby sniggered and moved out of the room to go say hi to Henry before Emma saw him, Emma hadn't seen Henry in a while and they weren't sure if she’d be unsure of him or immediately become attached to him.

Robin bit his lip trying not to laugh, he had been married to Regina for thirteen years, and with her for four years before that, yet he still thought that the twos digs at each other were hilarious, especially as they had proved time and time again that they would go out of their way for each other. “Hey Dave.” He grinned as David clasped his hand and shook it.

“Hey Robin.” He watched as his kinda-step-father-in-law’s eyes flicked to the doorway leading to the kitchen. “Don't worry, Rubes got us some beer.” He chuckled as Robin looked relieved.

“Hey there, dinosaur.” Robin took Emma from Regina and grinned down at her. “Have you seen my granddaughter? Her name is Emma, she has wild lion hair, and she gives the best cuddles.” It was a little weird being a grandfather to Snow’s kids, especially as Neal and Tyler were around the age of his own kids, but he loved them all, they were his family. 

Emma pulled down the hood so he could clearly see her face and hair. “Boo!”

Regina took in Emma’s little red, hot, cheeks as Robin pretended to be surprised. “Is she ill?” She asked David, her voice and look was sharp with concern for her granddaughter. 

David shook his head, that was one similarity they shared, their protectiveness over the kids. “Nah, she had some vaccinations, she seems to get the side effects worse than the boys ever did.”

Emma was twisting back towards David to go into his arms when she caught sight of someone coming into the room, it was only then that remembered who she had been told was coming to visit. “Uncle Henry!” Emma shouted, as always her ‘r’s came out sounding like ‘w’s, she started wiggling in Robin’s arms as she tried to get to Henry.

Henry beamed, he had feared that she wouldn't have remembered him from last Easter, she was only very young after all. He strode over and took her from his step father’s arms, as soon as she was in his arms she cuddled close and he rocked her a little as he held her. 

“Emmy, David, this is Ella.” He introduced his girlfriend to the last two Charmings, as he had to the rest of them in the hallway, with great pride in his voice and love in his eyes.  

“Nice to meet you, finally, Henry won't stop going on about you.” David smiled as he tried to tease Henry.

Ella looked proud. “It’s nice to meet you too, you have a lovely home.”

“Auntie Ella?” Emma asked confused.

Henry and Ella shared an alarmed look and both scrambled for an answer, though luckily for them, neither David nor Robin noticed their worry but Regina did, though she was kind enough not to question them just yet. 

David just smiled and shook his head kindly at his daughter. “No, Emmy, that’s mommy, mama, and daddy’s friend, Uncle Henry’s girlfriend’s called Ella too. Two Ellas.”

“Two auntie Ellas?” 

David just chuckled and shrugged “Eh, close enough.” 

“Hello Emma, it’s very nice to meet you, your uncle Henry’s been telling me all about you.”

“I’m not Emmy.” Emma told her seriously as the rest of the family rejoined them in the lounge. “I’m a dinosaur.”

Emma smiled as her whole family laughed at her seriousness, though she didn't take on that that was the reason for their laughter, she just like having them all around. “Grandma!”

“Yes dear?”

“You have dinosaur friends.”

“Do I now?” She smiled back at the toddler, not noticing David suddenly grimacing and sliding down in his chair to try and hide behind Snow. 

“Yup!” Emma popped the p of the word as she decided to squeeze to sit between Ella and Henry. “Daddy told me.” 

“Oh did he now?” Regina glared at David as everyone else, particularly Robin, started to laugh. 

“I, er,” He rubbed the back of his neck as he tried to explain, “we, were, er playing around?” 

Regina rolled her eyes, she tapped Robin’s chest with a playful glare to stop him from laughing quite so hard, though it didn't have much effect. The family all eventually settled into comfortable conversations before they moved through to the kitchen to settle down to eat.

Towards the end of the appetisers Emma started to become a little whiny again, and they knew that if she was simply left in her highchair she’d only become worse. 

“Do you want to sit with me, Em?” Henry offered with a kind smile, he had missed his little niece.

“Nooooo.” Emma whined making Henry’s face fall, “Daddy.” She whined looking at David, with a pout, who was already getting up to take her.

“I wouldn't worry about it Henry,” Ruby grinned, “she’s always choosing David over me and Snow, too.” 

David smiled proudly down at his daughter as he sat back down in his chair and passed her her sippy cup. “My girlie.” He kissed the top of her head before resuming his own meal. “You can sit on my lap to eat, Emmy.” He assured her as the empty plates were cleared away by Ruby, Snow, and Neal. 

Ruby went to pick up one of the dishes to take over to the table when Snow shot her a look telling her to sit back down. She could tell she was a little worried again, Ruby didn't blame her there seemed to be a lot of secretive glances between Henry and Ella, more so than usual lovey-dovey ones. There was something going on, they had been through enough to be slightly frazzled around these sorts of things, even if the chances of Ella being against their relationship dwindled the longer they spent in her otherwise pleasant company. “Here, Snow, let me help.”

“Nope,” She shook her head at her step brother, “you’re the guest, sit down.”

“And you cooked all this,” Henry argued, “it’s the least I can do.”

Snow stared him out as Robin stood up and walked over. 

Henry tipped his head back dramatically before he sat back in his place with a sigh. 

“And that’s where Neal gets it from.” Ruby murmured quietly to David.

“Thanks, Robin, I can take it from here.” Snow said.

Robin levelled her with a look, he may only be a decade older than Snow, but over the years he had become a slightly paternal figure in Snow’s life. “It’s okay, I can help, from the look you gave Ruby I’m pretty sure that you’re not going to let her help.” 

“You’re a guest too.” Snow argued but Robin just gave her another look. She rolled her eyes dramatically as Robin picked up a couple of the platters. 

“And there’s Ty.” David murmured back to Ruby, who snorted some of her wine out of her nose, the picture of sophistication.

Regina rolled her eyes at her son-and-daughter-in-law, but there was a hint of a smile, ‘Idiots’ she thought fondly. She too could see the characteristics of her son and daughter in her grandsons.

At the end of dessert, Henry tapped his clean spoon on his wine glass to get everyones attention, he got it, he also gave his niece inspiration as she tried to reach David’s glass. “Sorry.” He smiled sheepishly as David quickly moved it and quickly distracted her with more chocolate dessert.

Everyone looked at him with curiosity, even Neal and Tyler seemed to take a particular interest in what Henry’s next words would be, he sent a warm smile to Snow. “Thank you so much for the meal, well meals...” He smirked good-naturedly knowing that they had only eaten a small percentage of all of the different dishes, but he understood Snow well enough to know why, family was important to her beyond anything else and she just wanted it to be perfect, and it was. “It’s been amazing being able to visit.” Ella added with a smile. “Thank you so much.”

Henry nodded, and gave her a knowing smile, as though they were waiting for something which they knew was inevitable.

“But we’re not just here to see you all. We have some news we’d like to share... a week ago I asked Ella to marry me.” 

“And I said yes.”

“Damn.” Neal said before anyone else spoke.

“Told you, now pay up.” Tyler grinned holding his hand out to receive the $10 from Neal’s wallet. 

“You bet I’d be engaged?” Henry asked amused.

“It was either that or you would have gotten hitched in Vegas.” Neal shrugged handing the money over. 

“I tried to tell him that grandma would have killed you if she hadn't gotten an invite.” Tyler said proudly.

“Too right I would.” Regina said completely seriously, making everyone laugh, there were tears in her eyes, she had adopted Henry when he was a couple of months old but now he was most certainly a grown man. She pulled Ella into a hug as Snow hugged Henry. “Congratulations.” She told her genuinely. 

Snow released Henry and hugged Ella. “Welcome to the crazy family.” She joked as the room filled with excited talk and everyone saying congratulations, or in Emma’s case trying to.

“’Lation, ‘lation, ‘lation!” Emma copied as Henry cuddled her tight and the toddler let Ella do the same to her, she had no idea what was going on, but whatever it was it got her excited.

“This calls for a celebration!” David decided. He walked to the fridge and pulled out two bottle of champagne. 

“You just happened to have two bottle of champagne in your fridge?” Regina rose her eyebrow at him.

“What can I say, we’re just that classy.” He didn't mention that it was an accidental purchase when he was meant to be buying wine the other day, while trying to shop with Emma babbling a mile a minute and being clingy, Regina didn't need to know everything.

After they finished off desert, and the bottles of champagne, they moved back to the lounge. Neal and Tyler set up the games console and started to try teach Robin how to play the game, with a little teasing from Henry. 

Ruby, Snow, and David revealed the spring break trip plans to the kids, the boys were over the moon and Emma was just happy to join in with the excited cheering, Regina and Robin quickly talked it over with the trio and the plans were amended so they would all be going over together, 

Regina and Snow talked to Ella about weddings, while Ruby and David were only really interested in learning about her in general (they were still avoiding talk of weddings after the hassle of the planning of their own nineteen years before). 

Ella was interested in learning all about how the various couples met. She shared details of her own relationship with her stepmother and stepsisters and how nice it was to see from Henry’s family that they’re not all like that (Regina and Snow shared a smile at that, a lot had changed since Snow was a teenager and the two couldn't be in the same house, to the extent Snow had spent a lot of nights at Ruby’s her ‘really good friend’). Ruby and David shared with her their own terrible relationships with parents or step-parents, and that David wasn't even sure where his twin brother was.

Regina remembered her own abusive relationship with her mother, Cora, and how she had vowed to be nothing like her. While Snow remembered the show her father made of his relationships in public, but the fact they were as fake as his ‘nice’ personality were. But neither woman spoke of those aloud.

Henry took time to catch up with his nephews and nieces, learning about the hassle of applying to colleges Neal had gone through, and how soccer was going for Tyler, and he read stories from the book he had written to Emma.

And Emma spent most of the time going between all of the members of her family, cuddling them, or telling them stories, or getting them to play with her toys with her. Ella took a shine to the toddler which made everyone even happier to know that Ella would be joining their family. Memories were shared, drinks drank, photographs shown and stories remembered. 

Ella found herself becoming more and more fond of the town, simply by spending time with that family and hearing their stories, she was beginning to wonder if Henry would ever want for them to move from Seattle to Storybrooke, she thought she’d be okay if he did.

“I think we’re going to have a visitor in our bed tonight.” Ruby said quietly, she passed Snow a wine glass full of sparkling flavoured water, with her own glass of wine in hand she wrapped herself around Snow, sitting sideways on the couch both facing David and sleeping Emma. The two boys had gone to bed but the adults had yet to take Emma up, they knew she’d wake soon, and want feeding as she always did.

“Don’t we always?” Snow stroked some of Emma’s hair from her face, she leant back against her wife in her embrace, as Ruby passed their husband a cold bottle of Coca-cola (he wasn't one to drink too much, he knew its effects). She had a point, Emma usually slept in their bed with them either half way through the night or from the get-go. “It seems like only yesterday we used to spend most nights being kicked by Neal and Tyler in bed.”

“And now we have to kick them out of their beds if we want them up before midday.” Ruby said fondly. 

“Y’know Henry and Regina have always had a close relationship,” David mused hopefully, “maybe Regina will lay off me a little bit in favour of focusing on Ella...”

Ruby and Snow burst out into laughter, just about quiet enough not to wake Emma, but for long enough it gave David the answer to his musings. 

“Sorry, dear, I think you’re the only in-law she’s going to be hating.”

“I knew she hated me.” David pouted, but Snow kissed the pout from his lips, he figured having a monster-in-law was a small price to pay for having her perfect step-daughter as one of his two amazing wives.

[disappearingground]

Jenny Lewis Starts Over

Rolling Stone March 5, 2019

After saying goodbye to her mother and a 12-year relationship, an indie-rock icon finds a new clarity in art and life

By Jonah Weiner

There are 19 white stickers arranged across Jenny Lewis’ fridge. Each one carries a stamped date, the logo of Providence Holy Cross Medical Center, the word VISITOR and, in Lewis’ handwriting, a different beguiling little phrase: I taught him how to 2-step; Rosey posey put your snake finger on; You are a sunshine in a fruit. “Every day that I visited my mom in the hospital,” Lewis says, “I’d get one of these and write down something she’d say to me. She got more and more psychedelic as we kept upping the meds, and she’d say the most amazing things.” Lewis points at one — Glue me to the ceiling so you never leave — and sighs. “She had liver cancer. From untreated hepatitis C. She was a lifelong heroin addict and also mentally ill and . . . just a really sad situation.”

It’s a drizzly evening in early January, and Lewis is at her home in Los Angeles, drinking gamay wine and discussing things she’s never discussed publicly before. Some listeners over the years may have noticed scattered allusions in her songs to her mother’s troubles and the painful outlines of their relationship. In 2002, on an early album by her first band, Rilo Kiley, she described a mother who was “insane and high.” In 2006, on her debut solo album, Rabbit Fur Coat, she sang, “Where my ma is now, I don’t know/She was living in her car, I was living on the road/And I hear she’s putting that stuff up her nose.” But Lewis has always been careful to let these lyrics speak mostly for themselves. When people ask about them, she’s frequently emphasized that the line between memoir and fiction in her songwriting is a slippery one. “Sometimes I don’t even remember what actually happened,” she says now, “and the song takes on its own life.”

On Lewis’ new record, On the Line, her mother appears again. This time she is in a hospital bed “under a cold white sheet,” and there’s no fiction at work. The earliest sticker on the fridge is dated August 20th, 2017, and by the end of October, at age 70, Linda Lewis was dead.

“We were estranged for 20 years, so this was the first time we’d hung out in two decades,” the 43-year-old singer-songwriter continues. “She was very sick, but I think she held on so we could have time to reconcile, and it created an opportunity for forgiveness. She didn’t have to say, ‘I’m so sorry’ —she said it by saying, ‘You’re a sunshine in a fruit.’ That was her way of saying ‘I love you.’ ”

Lewis started out as a kid actor, appearing on Eighties-era sitcoms like Life With Lucy, opposite Lucille Ball, and in movies like Troop Beverly Hills and The Wizard, opposite Fred Savage. By her twenties she’d all but quit acting and become a burgeoning indie-rock icon instead, known for her clarion voice, her killer ear for melody and her knack for evocative storytelling in a tweaked Americana style. Whereas Lewis’ last musical project, an ad hoc collaboration from 2016 called Nice as Fuck, was stripped down and upbeat, On the Line contains the most lush and melancholy music she’s ever made. The album has a grand rock sound — stately pianos, swelling strings, fuzzy electric guitar. Lewis cut its 11 songs at the venerable Capitol Studios in L.A. over just a few days last year, but she began writing them in this house in 2014, not long before her 12-year relationship with the Scottish-American musician Johnathan Rice deteriorated. She finished writing them after her bedside reconciliation with her mom.

Lewis gives the fridge a final look before turning out of the kitchen. “I wonder how long I’ll leave these up here,” she says.

Addiction, sobriety and self‑medication are running themes throughout On the Line. There are references to red wine, weed, grenadine, heroin, bourbon, Paxil, Marlboros, cognac, Candy Crush and, on the song “Party Clown,” a hallucinogenic Fuji apple. “Somehow I think the worst one of them all is Candy Crush,” Lewis says with a grin. “My mom started taking heroin when I was two or three, probably. So, growing up like that, there’s a realization that nothing is for free, and everything catches up with you — if you try to numb out, eventually you’re gonna have to face whatever it is you’re running away from.” She pauses. “I don’t have any judgment about it. Even with my mom: She did whatever she had to do, and she wasn’t able to kick it. Most people don’t make it out of heroin addiction. I don’t really blame her for it.”

Wine in hand, wearing a satiny cowgirl shirt and a bandanna tied around her neck that’s nearly the same shade of red as her hair, Lewis shows me around the house. Situated near leafy Laurel Canyon, it was built by a Disney animator in the Forties, and his touch is everywhere — delicate, hand-painted flowers on a wall here, trompe l’oeil flagstones on the floor there. In the living room a projector is playing the X-rated 1968 film The Girl on a Motorcycle, which stars Marianne Faithfull and is alternatively titled Naked Under Leather. Lewis has been on a leather kick recently, she says, showing me a photo-heavy 1977 book called Hard Corps: Studies in Leather and Sadomasochism that she recently scored on eBay. “I keep my whips and chains out in the pool house,” she says with a cackle.

Off the living room is the wood-paneled chamber where Lewis rehearses and writes. There’s a drum kit, a Wurlitzer organ and a little gas stove in the corner. Outside, near the pool, there’s a koi pond and a rose garden, all of it put in by the animator. Down the hall, there’s a roller-derby-themed pinball machine from around 1990 that periodically flashes the words WINNERS DON’T DO DRUGS in LED lights. Opposite the pinball is an enormous old promotional cutout for The Wizard, depicting Savage as an adolescent wearing a Nintendo Power Glove and an adolescent Lewis in acid-washed denim overalls. “This was at the movie theater in Van Nuys where I grew up — my mom made me go in and ask for it,” Lewis says. “My sister had it in storage, then had it framed for me and rented a truck to bring it over here. I wasn’t OK with this for many years, because early on in the history of my band, people would yell video-game references at me from the crowd. Now I just can’t believe that this is part of my weird story.”

She says she loved being on Hollywood sets as a kid, for complicated reasons. “I guess I liked being in that environment because it wasn’t home — it was this pretend-family vibe. My dad wasn’t around, so every time I got a job I kind of fell in love with ‘my father’ on set. I would just want that relationship.” (Her real-life dad, a musician named Eddie Gordon, was absent for most of her life, though he came back into Lewis’ orbit shortly before his own death, playing harmonica on her second solo album, 2008’s Acid Tongue.) Lewis’ off-set life in that era was consistently chaotic: “I think my mother was selling coke in the early Eighties,” she says. “She may have been Ricky Nelson’s dealer. And she was using the money I was making and parlaying it into her business. I’d come home from school and there’d be racks of fur coats, Krugerrands, boxes of Vuarnet sunglasses. All these bulk items in the house, drugs cooking on the stove, people coming in and out. Really interesting characters. I remember we had a Honda Civic, and one day it disappeared. Years later, I learned that someone had torched it as a warning to my mom. There was crazy shit going on.”

Lewis says that her elder sister, Leslie, became something like a proxy mother to her in their actual mother’s stead, and when Jenny co-founded Rilo Kiley with some L.A. buddies in the late Nineties, “that was my first chosen family.” Over the years she’d host jam sessions at home, inviting over members of like-minded acts such as Haim, Dawes and Conor Oberst, here and elsewhere in L.A. “I’ve always brought that jam vibe with me wherever I go,” Lewis says. “I feel compelled to play music, to play with people, or I’ll go crazy.”

In 2015, having split up with Rice for reasons we don’t get into, Lewis went to New York, crashing at the empty apartment of her friend Annie Clark, a.k.a. St. Vincent. “I couldn’t stay in this house,” Lewis says. “Johnathan and I were basically married. When you’re with someone that long, you share consciousness with them. I didn’t finish any of my stories — Johnathan finished every story for me. So part of the reason I went to New York was to find my inner monologue. I wanted to know what that voice was.”

The result, some three years later, is On the Line. Lewis made it with a particularly impressive surrogate family whose members included not only Beck and Ryan Adams, with whom she’d worked before, but also an older generation of studio pros: Rolling Stones producer Don Was, Heartbreakers keyboardist Benmont Tench, session drummer Jim Keltner (sideman for John Lennon, Bob Dylan and Steely Dan) and — to her delight and surprise — Ringo Starr. “He was cool — he just showed up one day with a smoothie and did double-drums with Jim on two songs,” Lewis says, adding that she’s not totally sure why the former Beatle came aboard. “I think Don Was showed him some of the songs, invited him to come down, and he was into it.”

[Editors’ note: This story went to press before the February 13th publication of a New York Times report on accusations of sexual misconduct by Ryan Adams. In a February 15th tweet, Lewis made the following statement: “I am deeply troubled by Ryan Adams’ alleged behavior. Although he and I had a working professional relationship, I stand in solidarity with the women who have come forward.”]

A decade-plus into her solo career, Lewis found herself trying new things in the studio. Keeping things spontaneous was a priority: She recorded all her vocal tracks live while playing her instruments, rather than tracking them in later. When Beck inserted a bit of placeholder Auto-Tune on a song called “Little White Dove,” Lewis decided she loved it and kept it in unchanged. (It reminded her of the Detroit rapper DeJ Loaf, whose single “Try Me” Lewis adores.) When it came to mixing, she says she took inspiration from Kanye West’s Ye — clearing out the midrange, focusing on the low end and the highs.

She sits on an oversize armchair in her living room and looks around the house. These days she splits time between L.A. and Nashville, where she jams with a whole other group of friends, including Karen Elson. Three years since her breakup, Lewis says, “I know how to take care of myself. It’s been really lonely, and really hard at times, and to go through the stuff with my mom alone—”

She starts to cry, untying her neckerchief and using it to blot her tears. “This is why I wear a bandanna,” she jokes. “But that’s the thing: I had to visit her, then come home and be alone and process my life with her.”

On the wall in front of her, Marianne Faithfull is making love to Alain Delon, but Lewis isn’t paying attention. “Life is crazy, but it’s incredible,” she goes on. “How amazing to see someone pass over. It’s magical. It’s the most intimate. It’s like a poem, and you don’t know the last line until you get there. But you show up.”

[plotbunnyshipper]

Fundamental Cracks - Chapters 23 & 24

Ao3 Fundamental Cracks

Just need it in a fast reference window that my tablet won’t hate.

My mug is perched on the table, steam lazily dancing an irresistibly seductive siren’s call to me. My muscles ache as I wheel over to it, blowing over the rim and taking a test sip. Mmmm. I was up most of the night trying to force stubborn toes to obey my will. The battle was lost, but it doesn’t mean I won’t repeat it tonight.

“So, yesterday-” His voice is far too bright and cheerful for this early. Usually he’s on a run or off early to the office, and I get my caffeine fix in peace. Stupid Mondays!

“No talking before coffee.”

He rolls his eyes like I’m the crazy one, sliding a plate in front of me. I eye the eggs warily. “You need the protein.” Slices of fruit, toast, then a small bowl of yogurt are not so stealthily added.

“Stop, enough! How much of this do I have to eat for you to not frown at me all morning?” Or at least until he has to get to work.

He gives a bright smile. You haven’t won a business deal, answer the question. “As much as you want.”

Acting like a freaking Jewish-Italian mom with his food pushing! “Where’s your plate?”

He slides one across the table and settles in, taking a bite of kiwi.

We eat in silence. Around the paper I see him keep making subtle glances at my progress, but my stomach can only handle so much in the morning. Fruit and half the eggs are that limit, so I make the casual request for a coffee refill. As he makes his way to the kitchen I use my fork to drag his nearly empty plate across the table, pushing my own to replace it. “Hey!” his voice is sharp, otherwise silently returning with my coffee.

Busted. Nonchalantly I nudge it with the tines of my fork the last inch, not breaking eye contact and taking the mug, I dare you to call me out. “Thank you.”

He looks at my former plate, undoubtedly taking stock, then turns up that smile of his again, “If you wanted more all you had to do was ask.”

Before he can push any back onto the plate in front of me I mirror his grin, “I’m stuffed, but you should really finish that. You need the protein.” Felicity – 2, Oliver – 1. I reward myself with a big sip of coffee.

The under-his-breath mutter of defeat only makes the coffee taste that much better. “So, yesterday you said it had been years since your last happy ending-” He says it so blandly that I’m nodding along before the words click in my brain.

The mouthful of coffee paints the table. Oh my great Google-! I mean great googly moogly-! No, I mean- What?!

“Would you like me to order you something to help, with that?”

What did I say? I try to remember what I let my mouth get away with in that rather urgently stressful moment. No…oh no, no, no. I didn’t- Wait…did he say order? “Are you offering to get me a gigolo?”

He looks as surprised as I am, “That’s not what I…Do…Do you want me to hire-?“

I feel heat creeping up to my scalp, looking anywhere but him while interrupting, “Don’t! No! Don’t finish that! I mean, what-? Wait, that’s… none of your business.” My brain is spinning but no thoughts manage to catch. “Never mind, stop talking.” I shove, wheeling myself backwards so fast that I bump into a wall before frantically trying to navigate to the solitude of the room I’m staying in and pretend the last minute didn’t exist in the timeline.

“Felicity!”

“Nope. Wow it’s late, don’t you have to be at work? Better get moving, grooving, going.” I push the door shut behind me, listening for sounds from the main area.

}]}———}>

Hours later my toes are still refusing to cooperate no matter how much I try to coax, beg, manually push, and use electric pulses to force them into twitching again. So when the chime rings I’m not in the best of moods.

I evaluate the screen, asking the building security to leave the blandly logoed box addressed to me out there. When the guy is gone I retrieve it, pulling along the packaging tape as soon as the door is shut behind me. Maybe the new laptop parts that were on backorder…? No. definitely not parts.

I shove the small bottle and other item, in packaging splayed with bright stickers proclaiming ‘For Novelty Use Only,’ back into the box. My thumbs move faster than my thoughts, barraging Oliver’s phone with a set of messages as fast as I can type.

FS: Are you out of your mind? FS: You can’t buy things like that!

Well obviously he can and did…

FS: You can buy them. But not for me!

Oh wait, maybe they weren’t for me. A glance at the label again, that’s my name.

FS: Ignore those x3 FS: Oliver, your package arrived. You clicked the wrong recipient when ordering, it will be on the counter.

I’m trying to reseal the tape, having penned over the name already, when my phone chimes.

OQ:  No mistake. I know inapprop but you wouldn’t buy it for yourself OQ: Same as what you used to like

Why would he remember that, it was almost three years and a lifetime ago…I would have bought my own sex toys, I have bought my own sex toys, just not…just not when I’m like this. I still have trouble looking for more than a glance at anything but specific features in the mirror, the overall ‘me’ still looking sickly and weak, reminding me of the numbness, the boredom, the reason I was there, why I deserved to be in that cell. My shoulders hunch forwards, no one is here to see my self-loathing, but that doesn’t make it any gentler.

OQ: I’ll be out until 6 LMN if you need anything

The box stays on the counter, dangerous as a viper, so I throw myself back into PT exercises while streaming mindless videos.

}]}———}>

My shoulders hit the floor and I pant, catching my breath. The prickling itch of sweat demands I wipe it from my brow but the rest of my body insists that laying without moving here is the better option.

The knock comes again and my muscles tense painfully stiff in response. “Who is it?”

“Thea!”

"Go away." The thought of her energy is no friend to my exhaustion.

"Open the door, I'm taking you to lunch."

In that case, "Your brother already stuffed me before he left..."

There is a wordless noise, and based on experience I can just imagine her nose wrinkling, "No details please. I don’t need to hear-"

You Queens! Always taking innocently intended words the worst way. "Stuffed me with foo-“ Wait! Say it differently, “Made me eat a huge breakfast…of food! I’m not hungry. Go away I’m busy."

The door-muffled voice takes on a whine, "You stay cooped up in here all the time'"

So what if I do? “I do not!”

“Liar, liar, pants on fire...” The knob rattles slightly. “Shouting through the door isn’t working, I’m using my key”

“Key?” Of course she has a key. Ugh. I start to roll my sweaty gross self over to get to the couch, as I hear the door open.

"I was thinking Thai- You ok?” She starts almost jogging towards me.

I give her a wary look, “Yeah, why?

Her tone is like I’m deliberately ignoring something obvious, “Because you’re laying on the floor?”

"As opposed to levitating...?" I start lifting myself up, waving away the hands she offers as help, "Your brother let you try to do that when he was getting better?

She nods, eyes darting towards the balcony. “Mmmhmm.”

“And you call me a liar?” Scooting over and transferring to my chair, I push the wheels to coast over and get some water. A long drink later, I ask, "Why don’t you invite him out instead, he'd love to see you."

A fed up sigh “That’s not fair. He’s not you…” The silence stretches and we have a standoff of stares. “Fine, I’ll pick up stuff and we can eat on the balcony. You shower, I’ll be back soon.”

How did she win like that? I shower in cool water, muscles protesting when a soft tapping fills the room. Panic edges through me, but a glance at the window reveals the steady fall of rain continuing to spatter against the glass.

By the time I’m dry and dressed it is full on storming. At least that means the balcony is off limits.

Soon Thea flings open the door without knocking, laden with big bags of food. “It wasn’t supposed to rain today!”

I give her a wary eye. She is far too like her brother and I know a game of musical plates won’t work like this morning. "Planning on feeding an army?"

"Couldn’t decide what I wanted and took your advice."

I told you to go away, not feast. "What advice?"

"I invited Ollie."

Darting a covert glance between the package and the containers she’s pulling out, my words are slightly exasperated, "Then why didn't you just take him to lunch?"

"Because I miss you, Dummy.”

}]}———}>

Oliver strides in, umbrella in hand like a magazine model, not a hair out of place or a drop of water on his clothes. A quick hug and kiss near Thea’s ear, I’m sure whispering something out of my lip-reading sight. Surveying the spread of options his smile gets wider, “This looks great, thanks for the call.”

“Well Felicity said you’d want to see me, like we didn’t have dinner the other night, and it justified ordering the extra mango sticky rice and nuea ping.”

He looks over at me and I quickly correct her, “I said she should take you out, because I wasn’t interested and she was being all…” I wave my hand in her direction, “Thea-y.” My eyes give a pointed stare towards the package, still on the counter, followed with an unappreciative look at him.

Oliver just grabs a plate and starts filling it, “Thanks for inviting me anyway.”

}]}———}>

He gets a call partially through his fast eating, the leisurely pace of breakfast nowhere in sight. Checking who it’s from he sighs and grabs one more big mouthful before answering while walking towards the kitchen with his empty water glass. The frustrated, “Today?” carries back to us. A vaguely agreeing noise follows, “I’ll be there in 20.”

Thea starts packing one of the containers that held the food with as much of the types as will cram under the lid…surprisingly large amounts. Those two really do think on the same wavelength sometimes. A couple seconds later he is apologizing, snagging the container, thanking her with a hug and a goodbye, thanking me with a smile, then after grabbing his umbrella he’s off.

Thea sticks around, pushing food and failing to trick me into going out to a movie.

“Go spend your day off doing more than bothering me.” She won’t. Thea does join in on part of my routine when I start back up after the food is packed away, but she’s not really dressed for it. I get a huff of frustration mid-conversation, as I start on another set of reps and a short while later she leaves me in peace.

}]}———}>

When Oliver gets back from work he practically runs in, by the sound of it, to change before stopping by my room on his way out.

A knock which is odd because he usually just speaks through the door, and when I open it he extends a thick folder. “I’ll need you to sign these by Friday.”

Taking and opening the folder, I’m confused. “What are they?”

“Just tax things, one of the accountants made a mistake and if these aren’t resubmitted with original signatures by the extended deadline on Friday they’re pretty sure we’ll be on the short list for an audit. Which is not…when my parents were audited it was a big hassle, and I’d like to avoid it if possible.”

I bite back a laugh at his frustration with bureaucracy, "Of course you do." An amended return for four years ago…documentation from insurance and the hospital after I was shot skim past my fingers as I, flip the pages backwards seeing just how many pages there are. Getting to the last handful in the stack, I look from the front page, to the dates on it, then back at the checkbox. That’s not right.

"I can leave them now so you can read over them but again, Friday.”

“They made a mistake…”

“Where? They should be able to fix it first thing tomorrow, but you can read over the rest and then sign the updated one.”

I pull out the paperwork for last year’s taxes and hand them over. “This, this is wrong. They made the amendments for the prior year, but then they didn’t change it back after you filed the divorce.”

“Oh…yeah, that’s not wrong.”

The first minutes back at STAR Labs jump to mind. ‘I need to talk to my wife. Alone.’ Oliver’s demand to Barry from what feels like forever ago rings in my head like a taunting echo. No. No, that’s not… “Yes it is. Oliver it says we’re still married, if you want to avoid an audit that’s a pretty big flag-”

He slides the papers back into the folder, “We’re still married” I just stare at him, surely having missed a word. “What was it you said, ‘Surprise’ and ‘Mazel Tov,’ right?”

My head circles on a loop of confusion, "But- but- but it’s not valid anymore."

Oliver doesn’t reach out, doesn’t touch, if anything he inches backwards to give me extra space as I push myself back a spin. "Felicity, you know me, did you really think I'd blindly agree to walk away from-, bad choice of words, sorry. You think I’d just leave this marriage without even giving it a fighting chance."

But…but…but…"But we aren’t...the divorce..."

“Was never filed."

But I’m…But he’s…“You’re- you’re my- we’re-?”

A hidden smile shows in his eyes, at the corner of his mouth, and the lightness in his tone, "Yes, Wife."

"Stop that." He’s making fun of me. He’s not serious. “It’s not a joke! I can get the papers reprinted from the attorney and you-”

The smile disappears into his normal serious expression, “Felicity, you may have intended for this to be my second sham of a marriage, but we’ve consummated it twice since the date the license was signed by both of us, we made medical decisions for each other, we’re living together... Granted, we are going through some tough times, so our marriage-“

“Quit calling it that!”

He ignores the comment and keeps going, “-is strained, but we’re working on it.”

I shake my head, still not able to understand why he didn’t file the papers even after I got back.

He zips up his jacket and starts moving towards the front door, “We can even go to Bali for our honeymoon if you still want when you’re up for it, but for now I have to get moving. So please, read over, I need them by Friday.”

}]}———}>

The next morning is awkward. Or more accurately, it’s awkward for me. The folder rests in the center of the table, over Oliver’s briefcase. So obviously he’s seen the signatures…because he’s right they needed to be signed and unlike a couple months of retroactive marriage, a couple years of retroactive divorce would be tricky, especially since these tax returns were filed, State and Federal. Sigh.

Oliver sits eating, reading, nonchalantly having done another big breakfast, a serving bowl over a plate to keep it warm. “Oh don’t you act like there is nothing to talk about, Mr. Queen.”

He doesn’t look up, “You started this, I don’t know why you’re surprised.”

I glower, refusing to accept that as an excuse, but waiting until I’ve had a drink of coffee before responding, “Because I gave you your ‘out’ at the same time I told you! The marriage shouldn’t still be valid.”

A deliberate sip of water, and falsely innocent query, “Why not?”

“Because you- Because we weren’t really married! Because if you had just signed the papers and handed them off you would have been free of me.”

Oliver interrupts before I can argue my point, all the thoughts that debated in my head last night are conspicuously absent now that I’m trying to use them. “Felicity, why would you think I would want that?”

“You said it yourself, it was a sham. It was bait, and I exploited it to get you what you wouldn’t have accepted otherwise but needed and we both know it!” My palms swat at the table, making the glasses tremble.

He looks strait at me, absolutely serious, “I told you I wanted to marry you, and I think you’re starting to understand this is real for me.”

Is this why he’s letting me stay here? Some stupid sense of duty? Trapped into it by an overinflated sense of honor and code of what’s ���right’ for him? “What about your family?”

A hand extends towards me, but stays out of my carefully spread bubble of personal space, marked clearly by glass and cutlery, “You’re part of my family.”

I clench then pull my hands into my lap to avoid the instinctive urge to touch. It’s awkward, so I run them to touch the water, the rim of the plate, the tines of the fork, anything to change up the sensations. “No, the family you’re making for William.”

He catches himself mid eye-roll, and repeats himself, slowly, “You. Are. Part. Of. My. Family.”

I glide backwards, then towards the table again, the closest I can do to pacing. Do I have to spell it out? “You and Samantha!” He just waits, raising his eyebrow instead of questioning my words. I lift my hands, extending my fingers out, palms up, in his direction, with a ‘come on’ gesture. Gritting my teeth I force out the awkwardness…the increased awkwardness, “I have done my best not to be a distraction from your…” Reunions, hookups, courtship – oh my god who even thinks the word courtship? “Your family visits.”

He nods, apparently not understanding the air quotes around the word, “She drops off William, then goes and enjoys her weekend, or week, or…” He trails off, tilts his head “’Family visits?’ Is that supposed to be…? You think I’m-, we’re-...Is that why you refuse to be here when William visits?”

This is right up there with the sex toy in topics I didn’t want to have with him face to face, heat creeps across my cheeks and I avoid the fingers that try to bump mine, “I don’t want to listen to you catching up.”

“I’m sure your stepson wouldn’t either, but she doesn’t stay, and her time here isn’t…” he searches for the word and manages to find a pair that are more my level of brain mashing – specific but weird, “conjugally intimate.” It was a trap, because as soon as our gazes meet he continues, “You’re my wife, I’m not about to knowingly commit adultery.” His eyes are practically electric with anger, “Thanks for that by the way. Great part of your out that made me out to be the boy I was before the island rather than the man I am today.”

The jab lands and my retort is as defensive as it is loud, shouting across the table, “I marked adultery on my end, not yours! It wasn’t even real-real at the point you were with Susan! I wanted you alive! Alive and free, and I gave you a way to be both!”

His voice loses it calm, “Well you got that half right!”

A silence hangs, both of us obviously pissed with how this conversation is going down.

Think. Logistics. “Who else knows about our- about the marriage?”

Another couple seconds of quiet, then Oliver is the epitome of calm again, “Quentin, but that was your move. My accountant, our medical team.” He thinks while ticking off fingers for those just named, “Barry now, I guess.”

“Thea?”

“No.”

“My Mom?”

“Not unless you told her, and you will be the one to share that with Donna.”

“John?”

“Everyone you’re going to name that isn’t on that list is a no…” he deadpans the thought, then stands to pace between the table and the kitchen, “Speaking of names, I left it how you had it in the paperwork, did you want to keep your maiden name, hyphenate – I would prefer Smoak-Queen over Queen-Smoak if we both change, or were you interested in the idea of picking something entirely new?”

“How are you so-? You were- when they first brought me back…and before, when you were going in for surgery you were…” shocked, pissed, ”you didn’t want to let it happen, you were going to fight me on it.”

“Your delivery of the information could have used some better timing, better discussion beyond ‘We’re married. I’m forcing you into surgery and sweet talking the nurses so they won’t say anything, here are the divorce papers, good bye.’ Yes, I was…surprised, and angry, and that helped fuel my recovery, but Felicity I love you. I never stopped.”

You’re wrong, “You can’t. I…” How can he not understand? “Look at-!“ I fight the urge to block his ability to do what I ask, “Just look at me.”

He does, slowly. “What am I supposed to be seeing that makes it impossible for me to feel the way I do?”

Squeezing over the slowly rebuilding muscle I cringe and stare away. “Don’t act like you don’t know. You don’t have to spare my feelings, don’t have to lie about it. I’m damaged. Broken, ugly-“

A harsh laugh cuts me off, “Do my scars disgust you?” He starts pulling off his shirt, putting it and the undershirt beside his suit jacket, revealing the patchwork of healed wounds.

At least one large one looks very fresh, and I try to keep my mind on what he just said and not trying to remember what I eavesdropped on the comms and in their records to try and place its source. “What?”

The words are soft, a genuine query, accusatory in the mimicked words, “What do you see when you look at me? Someone damaged, broken, and ugly?”

“Of course not”

“-course not.” He says with me. Oliver crosses his arms over his chest, “Did you leave because I was a paraplegic?” Before I can get out my confused question he continues, “You’re using that as a ridiculous excuse for me. It makes no more sense the other way around. Why would you expect me to think differently about someone like one of us than you do?”

“Because I’m-” different, not the woman you fell in love with, a killer, virtually an agoraphobic, sickly looking, depressive…Stop, change approach, “ You’re…you. Oliver, you’re a bil-former billionaire, the Mayor, insanely kind, protective, gorgeous, and a hero. Even if they don’t know just how important you are to this city I’m sure any number of people you date would-“

He leans over, and I pull back, “I’m married, I don’t date anyone but my wife.”

That argument again, like he ignores his options, “You don’t have to! You can get out of it. Find someone-“

“This is me telling you I don’t want to. Our differences are reconcilable. I contest your arguments. I won’t push you with what you’re not comfortable with, but I want to fix our marriage.”

We stare at each other. I know what he wants me to say, just like I know I can’t say it. ‘I want to fix this marriage too’ and, ‘I love you’ and any number of ways I could agree or apologize. I’m not even sure I’m capable of love like that anymore.

Oliver’s phone chimes a reminder tone, and we both glance at the clock. He’s going to get caught in traffic if he’s not out the door in the next couple minutes. “I could stay…?”

I can’t force myself to agree to that, “No. You’re the Mayor, that’s important.”

This is important.

I point at the folder of papers. “You have to drop those off. Go.”

[baybert]

That last ask

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

“Well this is kinda awkward, didn’t really see this coming .”

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

We cool, i got uninvited to her wedding tho

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

Depends on the type, anything other than but or hallucinogens id be concerned  

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

Ye, but by one

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

Probably sober? Honestly been so long i can’t remember

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

Lmao, Is there really any other way to do it?

7. What does your last received text say?

“Yeee!”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

Too many to count tbh

9. Where was your last kiss at?

Probably at her parents house

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

Earlier today!

11. What do you drink in the morning?

Usually a fruit smoothie

12. Where did you sleep last night?

Floor of my grandmas living room

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

They are, but they can be so worth

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

Less money towards alcohol, more towards tattoos

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

Not between us, her fiance would be trippin tho

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

Rainy for sure bro

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

Not as far as I know

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

Nah, athletic shorts atm

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

Probably not i feel

20. Does anyone like you?

Yeah, im pretty sure

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

Yeah, like once 

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

Nah

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

Is myself an option?

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

A better question is where i wouldnt consider getting one

25. In the past week have you cried?

like twice, last time was bc isaw a post of this little boy playing at his friend’s grave

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

Black lab ily Bojack

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? 

Out, do People do it in?

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

Nah

29. Do you think you’re old?

Sure feel like, shit

30. Do you like text messaging?

Yeah, im better at talking when i have time to construct my messages

31. What type of day are you having?

Ehhhh

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

Nah, but i want my eyebrow pierced

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

Cold is better for cuddling, but warm wins bc swimming

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

A couple

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

A fling sounds fun, but it really depends on who im talking to 

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

I think im simple

37. What song are you listening to?

Rainbow in the dark- Dio

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

Usually yeah 39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?

Not, really. Tbh i don’t think anyone really does at this point 40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

She like crazy cute, just really one of those people who’s like a shining light 41. When did you last receive a text message?

1:06 pm 42. What is wrong with you right now?

I’m just a sad guy tbh 43. How well do you know the last female you texted?

Pretty well, i think 44. Does anyone disgust you?

Myself again? lol 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?

Again, depends on who 46. Are you in a good mood right now?

Been a couple day tbh 47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?

My dad 48. What color shirt are you wearing?

Purple and black 49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?

Boss told us that we gotta finish this one job tomorrow, gonna be a long fucking day 50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

Feel like the opposite happened tbh 51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

Nah, ain’t no one responsible for my feelings but me yo

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

Nah, if im at that point its probably over 53. Do you like rain?

I love it yo 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

Only if they ain’t sharing 55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

I mean yeah, hasn’t everybody? 56. Do you like to cuddle?

Love to, unless its too hot.  57. Are you shy?

Sadly 58. Do you get along with girls?

As much as anyone else i guess 59. Have you dated the person you texted last?

Been on a date or two, but im not sure if that counts 60. What do you carry with you at all times?

Phone, wallet 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

Fuck yeah, im be getting to know the ghost n shit 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

Done it before 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

Nah 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

Very 65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

Not really that i can think of tbh

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

22 23 and 22

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?    

I’ll just have my lil sis do em 68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?

Leopard i guess 69. Do you have any stickers on your car?    

I got a pogo one on my truck 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?    

no idea who Luke Bryan is tbh, so i guess Weezy 71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone?    

Android 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    

I think like two or three weeks ago 73. Do you like diet soda?    

Nah man, fuck that 74. What color are the walls in your room?    

What room? 75. Are you 16 or older?    

bouta be 22 76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?    

Never have 77. Do you have a job?    

I am currently an HVAC Apprentice    78. What are your initials?    

RTE 79. Did you ever have braces?    

Never, thankfully ive never needed em. that shit expensive yo 80. Are you from the south?    

Southern Cali, so nah

81. What does your last status on facebook say?    

“The police force has always been the most dangerous gang in america. Being unaccountable for your actions is a hell of a drug, absolute power and all that” 82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?    

Nah 83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?    

Probably my dad, but i love them both equally 84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?    

nah, gymnastics is cool af tho 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?    

Rogue one 86. Do you smoke?

Bud,yeah 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?    

Flip flops, heels look uncomfortable af 88. Is your phone touch screen?    

Yeah, shits cool 89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?    

Curly i guess,think its more wavy tho 90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?    

Never had to tbh 91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?    

Lake sounds cool 92. Have you ever made out in a car?    

Shit fun yo 93. …Had sex in a car?    

Shits even more fun yo. Especially road head 94. Are you single or in a relationship?    

Currently single 95. What were you doing last night at midnight?    

Sleeping, like i should be rn 96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?    

Tuesday, cousin and brother put on a fucking show yo 97. Do you like the camera on your phone?    

Its pretty alright, nothing too special 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?    

Nah, seems cool tho 99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?    

A couple times 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?    

Why would i do that? 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?    

Like twice 102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    

Only one i know is tick tock tbh

103. Do you have any tan lines right now?    

Farmers tan ftw 104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?    

Probably not, i don’t really do boots unless its for work

[cutiecrates]

Review: Kawaii Box Nov 2016

Message of the Month: Have a Pink X-Mas!

(and ironically, I did.)

For the month of November, subscribers were presented with 11 items!

Something I love about Kawaii Box is that even if it feels a little repetitive at times- they give you so much. And for a cheap price!

As usual we’ll get right into it then.

Not Pictured: Kracie Popin’ Cookin’ DIY Pudding Flan Parfait Kit.

(and yes the name is that long OxO)

Basically, this was eaten BFB (Before Blog, I’ll probably be using that if need-be at times). I did have pictures from when I made it- but I don’t feel like they were worthy of the blog (plus there’s that pic limit). Long story short, I actually don’t like pudding much, and was terrified it’d taste like Banana (something else I’m not crazy over). It was really good! You can find this set online and if you do, I suggest you try it.

Meiji Mini Candy Box - Meiji is another popular brand most people hear of in Japan. They make all sorts of candy, with their most common to find being: Strawberry Smarties (candy coated strawberry chocolate), Coffee Beat (chocolate coated coffee taste), Choco Baby (petite chocolate pieces), Apollo strawberry chocolate (strawberry chocolate candies) and Smarties (candy coated chocolate).

Everyone received one random box- and luckily, I got the one I wanted! Since trying the DIY for them, I always wanted to try the real apollo’s and they did not fail to disappoint. For such a tiny box they really give you a lot too.

And just look at that kawaii Tamagotchi-esque mascot~

If you’re interested in trying any of these, check out the official shop related to Kawaii Box:

http://www.blippo.com/meiji-mini-assortment-set-1.html

Fruit Shaped Sharpener - An adorable... well the name says it for me :3 I’ve yet to use this, considering I actually don’t carry around normal pencils, and the few I still own- I have no idea where they’re at. Available in Watermelon, Orange, Kiwi, Dragon Fruit, and Tomato.

(Yes, a lot more places are calling Tomato a fruit now. Guess its official.)

Anyway, while I haven’t used it, what I do like is that it seems to be made with the intent of using the inside as a pencil shaving collector. Which is always a plus in my book.

Bananya Plush Charm - KAWAII!! Pretty much all there is to say on it. Out of the choices I definitely got the one I’d want. But here’s a pic of the others for you guys to enjoy:

(sorry for the minor glare)

Besides the one I got, I think the black one is the second cutest. But they’re all precious.

Cute Milk 2-Color Pen - HOW CUTE IS THIS?! An adorable cow-themed pen with 2 colors! and look, PINK!

This pen is available in 5 styles, 1 pink, 1 blue, and 4 black with alternate faces. As a pen it works nicely, just remember to be careful when you pull/push down the ears and horn. They’re very delicate, with one side writing in red/pink, and the other side blue.

Pastel Eraser Pen - Did you think they gave us two pens this time around~? You’re close, but there’s no ink! It’s a pen-shaped eraser that works like a led pencil, how cool is that?! and look, again, pink!

(In case you missed my earlier posts, pink is my favorite color~)

These “pens“ are sure to fool friend and family alike as you whip it out of your purse or pencil case. Available in every color of the rainbow (with pink being the substitute for Red).

Here’s an example of the tools in use. I used the pen to doodle a little drawing, and the erase to rid of something I drew with a pencil (led, not a regular one). The eraser works very well, I just left the eraser shavings so that you guys could tell there was something there prior.

Kawaii Christmas Stickers - They’re kawaii, they’re little, they’re perfect for Resin crafts! This little red-nosed Santa is bound to brighten up someone’s day when they watch as he has fun in the winter scenery.

Peep Out! Animal Stick Markers - Do you guys remember those little planner stickers or tabs? Basically that’s what these are, except they’re thicker. These little cuties will keep everything you need to remember for easy access at a given notice. But will your friends and family be able to resist peeping after they see them??

Available in Alpaca, Shiba Inu, Panda, Neko, Bear, Seal and Penguin, Cat paws, and Bunny.

Happy Whistle Keychain - I’ll just say now that I’m not sure the whistle works. It’s advertised to work on the Kawaii Box blog, but when I try it just barely does. It just could be me though- I have asthma, I can’t sit around trying to make it work without getting dizzy XD

Once again I got it in Pink. But it’s also available in pastel yellow, and pastel purple. 

(Was I seriously this lucky, or did everyone else get everything in pink too? They told us to have a Pink X-Mas but everything had variety too.)

Harajuku Hair Accessories - A two set piece with a pop, step, and colorful design!

(anyone get that reference?)

The 2 sets you get are randomized, so you can get these two, a red and pink rainbow with a ! on it and hair clips that match, or pink clips with love you written on it and a normal rainbow with a smiley face on it.

As usual Yoko lent me a hand in showing them off. She thought they were a bit “too Pop“ for her, so I took them out when we finished.

Now, this is the last set. Because of the pic limit I decided to try to find a way to display it that I liked.

DIY Korean Cupcake Set - A fun and easy crafting set available in 3 colors: Pink, Blue, and Yellow (the only pink thing I didn’t get if you notice the box back there). The only real difference between them are colors of the “extra“ items and the plate designs.

Included in the Box are: Plastic Tweezers, 2 wine bottles, a glass, 2 coffee cups, 2 cupcake liners, 4 little plates, a pack of air dry clay, and a container of little deco bits.

I’ll start by saying this is a very cute product and super-easy DIY. But... the quality is a bit bad. I say this because:

1. My clay packet was broken open, so half of the clay was dry and unusable.

2. The stickers on the plates were very loose and I had to press on them to make them “stick“ a little better.

3. Plastic remnants remained on the bottom of a few items and I had to cut/scratch it off with my nails.

Again its a really cute set and I did have fun with what I could use, but you can’t go in expecting top-notch quality with it. It’s quality was very “dollar store kit“ (you know, those kits that are really cheap and come with poor quality products that either don’t work or never look like the picture on the box?).

In the end, I decided not to make a big fuss over the clay, considering I buy my own air dry clay anyway. With what I had, I did try to make something though.

Here you can see Yoko with a decorated cupcake, some fruit slices, and some blue wine. Now, lets enjoy some sweets and continue on with the Cutie Ranking!

<3 Cutie Ranking <3

Quality - I wasn’t planning to include this, but I felt like i had to here. Everything was fine, except for that cupcake DIY. While I did like it, it would be unfair of me to say everything was perfect when it wasn’t. It had 3 problems with it and I did make them work, but I’m not going to lie. I don’t know when the bag on the clay broke, but I kind of wish someone checked this before it was sent out because I saw it was damaged from outside the box. 4 out of 5.

Content - I really liked the last box, and this box I liked about the same, if a teensy bit less. Everything is so tiny, I got that “dollar store“ vibe again. Cheap or not, when you have bigger items in a previous box it kind of says a lot when you give people tiny things in the next. 4 out of 5.

Practicality - I’ll be forgiving here since I did essentially use everything in the box, which is uncommon. 5 out of 5.  

Total Rank: 13 out of 15 Cuties.

As I said above, I did enjoy this box. The smaller scale items are nice, but it feels like they went cheap and to some people that can be a deal breaker.

<3 Cutie Scale <3 1. Bananya - I don’t think anything can top this cuteness <3

2. Cute Milk 2-color Pen - Look at that precious Moo-cow face and tell me its not cute~

3. Kawaii Christmas Stickers - Tiny red-nosed Santa is so cute!

4. Peep Out! - Just precious. A bit generic cute though.

5. Happy Whistle Keychain - I don’t now why but I just think this is really cute.

6. DIY Koren Cupcake Kit - I LOVE miniature items, especially food based. However, I did mark it lowly due to the “issues“, which made it less-cute.

7. Harajuku Accessories - These are more or less “Pop“ cute.

8. Meiji Mini Candy - The candy resembles the design on the box, the package is also super-cute!

9. Eraser Pen - It’s cute to me, but its so plain.

10. Fruit Sharpener - its more on the realistic side of cute, so it’s not nearly as cute as most of the other things in the box.

11. Pudding Parfait DIY - its cute, but once you eat it its gone. It’s fleeting cuteness.

That’s it for now guys, in just 3 more boxes I’ll be caught up to my January/Current stuff. I have 2 more boxes coming for the month yet, and as I’ve said, don’t worry because I do have other posts planned. This blog will be active!

Until then, stay cute!

[topfygad]

The Ultimate Guide to Working Holiday Visas in Australia

Australia was one of my first big international trips and it’ll always hold a special place in my heart. In fact, it was the birthplace of this very site! During my first visit, I was on a typical tourist visa.

This common tourist visa is officially called Subclass 601 and it allows you to visit Australia up to three months at a time in a given year.

It’s a pretty handy visa because you can enter the country as many times as you’d like during the course of a year. So theoretically, you could explore some of Australia, make friends and head to Bali with them, and then go back to Australia…I may know from personal experience.

It’s also pretty darn cheap! You’ll pay 20 AUD (about 14 USD) to apply online and because it’s all processed electronically, most of the time you can get it within 24 hours. If you’re just planning on traveling around Australia for 90 days or less, this is what you’ll need!

However, if Australia steals your heart (like it did mine!), you need to do a bit more planning if you want to stay for a longer period of time. This leads us to Working Holiday visas!

Many people who want to explore Oz in depth, work somewhere else for a change of scenery, or do a gap year opt for a Working Holiday visa down under! Don’t know where to start? No worries, mate!

Here is your guide to Working Holiday visas in Australia!

What is a Working Holiday Visa?

The name pretty much sums it up: it’s a balance between work and play! The idea of a Working Holiday visa is to allow you to split your time between working and exploring.

It’s ideal for those who want to stay in Australia for more than 90 days at a time, take a gap year, and make a little money while traveling. Oh, and for those that are thinking about maybe wanting to make Australia a permanent home one day—it’s a good way to plant roots, find possible employment options, and see if it would be a viable option.

Where should you travel with a Work and Holiday visa? 

I’m glad you asked! The options are endless—you might find you absolutely adore Byron Bay or Sydney and settle there, or perhaps you like the vibe of Melbourne. You could even road trip or take the train and visit Uluru and Alice Springs (here’s an epic itinerary for the Outback!). Of course, you’d have to make your way up to the Great Barrier Reef.

Like I said above, the Work and Holiday (or Working Holiday visa) is made so you can holiday!

10 Tips for Your First Trip to Australia

From the otherworldly landscapes to the animals to the scuba diving spots…and don’t even get me started on the food—Australia definitely deserves a spot on your bucket list. Ready for an adventure of a lifetime down under?

Read More

Working Holiday 417 Visa

The best visa for you will depend on where you are from.

If you are from Belgium, Canada, Cyprus, Denmark, Estonia, Finland, France, Germany, Hong Kong, Ireland, Italy, Japan, Korea, Malta, Netherlands, Norway, Sweden, Taiwan, or the United Kingdom, you can get a Subclass 417 visa (otherwise known as the Working Holiday visa).

If you are from one of these countries and are between the ages of 18 to 30 (or 18 to 35 if you’re Canadian, French or Irish), the 417 visa is a prime choice. It is intended for those who want to extend their stay and fund it by working locally.

This visa costs $440 AUD and you can apply online. While you can work while you are in Australia, you do need to have enough funds to support yourself…just in case. It’s a requirement to have at least $5,000 AUD saved.

Why is this necessary? The Australian government wants to make sure you have enough money to book a ticket back home in case you don’t end up finding a job or spend all your money on…Tim Tam biscuits (totally kidding!) But I am serious about having the proof of funds in your bank account.

Bondi Icebergs, Sydney

Work and Holiday 462 Visa

Similar to the 417 visa, there is a Subclass 462 visa (also known as the Work and Holiday visa), for those 18 to 30 years old who are not from one of the countries listed above. These visas are both, according to the Australian government, meant as “a temporary visa for young people who want to holiday and work in Australia for up to a year.”

To be eligible for a 462 visa, you must be from Argentina, Austria, Bangladesh, Chile, China, Czech Republic, Hungary, Indonesia, Israel, Luxembourg, Malaysia, Peru, Poland, Portugal, San Marino, Singapore, Slovak Republic, Slovenia, Spain, Thailand, Turkey, USA, Uruguay, or Vietnam.

USA readers—this is most likely the visa you’ll want!

This 462 visa costs $485 AUD (337 USD). While the 417 visa tends to be instant, the 462 visa can take up to two months to get approved, so make sure to allow for plenty of time before booking your ticket.

You will need to have at least $5,000 AUD ($3,479 USD) in your bank account and meet some additional requirements.

There are set educational requirements, English skills, and (unless you are from Israel, China, Singapore, or the USA) you will need to get a letter of support from your national government. Read more on the requirements here!

The Application Process

Whether you are doing a 462 or 417 Visa,

I’d suggest only going through the Australian government website. There are companies who will sell a visa service, but in my opinion, it’s a waste of time and money.

The application process to get one of these visas is super simple as long as you follow instructions and provide the proper paperwork. Yes, you might need to collect a few documents which can be tedious, but the actual application couldn’t be easier!

Sydney Opera House

The Fine Print

Once you have received your visa (electronically! It’s typically not one you have to print and doesn’t require a sticker in your passport—so don’t fret!), you have 365 days for your Aussie experience. If you received your visa on the first of February, you have until the first of February the following year to come and go.

During this year, you will have the opportunity to work up to six months with one employer. There are a few industry and location restrictions, so read up on the official visa website before you get all of your plans in place.

Beyond the work restrictions, it is pretty straightforward. You can study up to four months and re-enter Oz as many times as you want while your visa is valid!

How To Get a Job

Your best bet for work is in customer service. Hotels/hostels, retail stores, cafes, and restaurants are generally open to six-month terms, especially if you have some experience.

While some places won’t hire backpackers (they want to make sure their staff is there to stay for longer than a week or two), there are many places that will hire travelers. Given a bit of luck and the drive to find work, you’ll be able to find places to fund your trip along the way.

You might even find a new career path…who knows?

Some folks find jobs at wineries or doing “regional work” in the field—picking fruits or helping around the farm. Many people on Working Holiday visas opt for this as it allows for a bit more flexibility and freedom.

While you typically can’t stay employed at a place for more than six months, you can apply to extend your working permission. Generally speaking though, you will want to start by planning for just the first six months and then explore options.

Tips for Finding a Rental

So, this definitely depends on how long you’re planning on staying in any one location. If you’re only at each place for a few weeks, you might want to opt for staying in hostels or booking an Airbnb.

But if you’re staying longer, there are a ton of legit rental companies all over Australia! However, it can often be difficult to score a place if you’re not signing a year-long lease.

Gumtree is Australia’s answer to Craigslist…but it can be a slow and messy way to find a place. You definitely need to research if looking to rent one of these places as a number of scams can pop up. But you can *sometimes* find rentals this way, just take precautions.

That said, agency listings are the prime place to find a home to call your own. Agency listings are typically cheaper than long-term Airbnb options but are more reliable than what you’ll find on Gumtree. Another option—check to see if there are any housing boards or ads at local coffee shops!

As you are searching, keep in mind that prices are always listed by the week rather than the month! So it’s not nearly as cheap as it seems.

Make Sure to Get Travel Insurance

I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: travel insurance saves the day! If you had asked me during my first Aussie trip, I would have said it’s a waste of money. But I’ve lived and I’ve learned, and here’s why you need travel insurance.

You never know what’s going to happen, especially while you’re abroad…you might get bitten by a Jack Jumper ant or your flight might get canceled due to crazy weather in Sydney.

Getting a Second Work and Holiday Visa

Want to stay in Australia even longer? I don’t blame you!

For those that are wondering, you can’t *exactly* extend your visa but you can apply for a second Work and Holiday visa if you meet the specified requirements. Which is pretty much the same thing!

For those on a 462 visa and the 417 visa, you have to have completed 3 months of specified work on your first Work and Holiday visa and then you can apply for a second one. And as of July 2019, if you really want to stay longer—you can explore options to stay for the third year!

Helpful Tip:

What happens if your visa is almost up but you’re hoping to get a second one? You can obtain a bridging visa so you don’t have to go home for the interim period, read up more about this here!

Make sure that if you apply in Australia, you’re in Australia when the government decides on your application; if you apply outside Australia, you must be outside Australia when the decision is made.

Overall

Getting a Working Holiday visa is a great way to travel around Australia—with it, you can balance your time between working and exploring and seeing so much of what Oz has to offer!

Are you considering getting a Working Holiday visa or have you done this in the past? I’d love to hear about your experience in the comments below!

  from Cheapr Travels https://ift.tt/2K34IKk via IFTTT

[happy2bmyownboss]

We have had quite the week again. Fun and crazy as usual. Keep reading to find out about some of our many adventures here in the little house on the pond. We have included affiliate links to some of the products mentioned in this post. These help to support our blog.

Monday

Elephant fuzz here, elephant fuzz there, elephant fuzz everywhere… sounds a bit like a children’s book, doesn’t it? So what is elephant fuzz? I asked the same thing when I first saw this all over the house:

  The kids were quick to reply that it was ‘elephant fuzz’…. ok, but where did it come from? Here is the answer:

It appears that this little pillow has a hole and is leaking elephant fuzz… lol… kids come up with the darnedest things don’t they? Well, I got the hole taken care of and hopefully that’ll be the end of the elephant fuzz.

Afterwards we made some Haystack Cookies or Noodle Cookies as Mr. Awesome calls them. The kids have been eating them up!

That afternoon Jacob put his Kids Cook Real Food skills to work while helping me make a salad to go with our Red & White Pasta.

Monday our regular club dance was ‘dark’ to support a reunion dance that was being held locally. Here is a short video from the event:

  We had a good time and got to see old friends plus we made some new ones while we were there. Afterwards we ate at Texas Roadhouse and an exceptional server named Terrence.

Tuesday

I got a call from the Florida Gardiner Scholarship telling me about a glitch in the system which had caused some of my orders to be denied… this meant I had to go back into the system and resubmit the orders… oh what fun!

I also figured out that I can ‘Air Drop’ pictures from my phone to my tablet… this makes life so much easier!

The kids are loving their new routine chart:

I am working on ordering some different magnets because the stars don’t stick very well. I may also paint or paper the board. There will be a post about this sometime in the future.

We read a chapter from the Laura Ingalls Wilder biography before bed and had a short discussion about the things we learned from the chapter. The kids are super excited about the new school year.

They were also very happy that I had ordered more of their favorite toothpaste:

We all love the lemon flavor and I love the fact that it works so great! I always buy the triple pack and the first time I ordered I bought the multipack so we could try out all the flavors. The kids didn’t care for the peppermint or cinnamon as they thought they was too spicy. Some of us older folks liked the wintergreen flavor but lemon was the majority vote.

I actually found a little time on Tuesday to paint my nails too! Mommas need a little bit of pampering from time to time. 😊

Wednesday

Wednesday morning we changed our breakfast routine a bit. Instead of Muffins the kids had a bowl of fresh fruit and a cup of yogurt.

I’m really loving this new fruit bowl I got earlier this month. It is so much bigger than the one we had, plus it’s not as fragile. The banana holder is a great feature as well. It keeps the kids from dragging out and bruising all of the bananas just to find the ‘perfect’ apple.

While cleaning the bathroom I got a call from Walgreens …. NOT… it was a telemarketer call disguised as a local business. I HATE these kind of calls. They wanted to help me with my interest rate on a card they knew nothing about.

After politely asking a strongly accented Chris Sawyers to remove me from the list I had to threaten to report them to the authorities for FRAUD. He asked me to hold online while he removed me from the list. I did hold, with the phone muted and the receiver set on the shelf, and an hour later I was still on hold… haha Mr. Sawyers from card services you’ve won a mention on my blog. Congrats!

After our morning chores were finished we played one of the new games that we’ve gotten:

  Bugs Building is similar to the once popular Jenga game. They had a lot of fun playing the game but then we had some major midweek meltdowns!

Luckily I still had a hidden stash of FREE chocolates…

Thursday

Hmmm… Thursday was a kinda gloomy day, very rainy and windy too. We didn’t get our laundry done because of the weather but it got finished up on Friday. We were also without power for a little while that morning.

The kids made the best of no electricity and played some board games. I think they thought they were getting out of chores but everyone had to help finish up the chores when the power came back on. Then it was time for some lunch which was Grilled Cheese Sandwiches.

After I got the kids down for quiet time I got this text message from Mr. Awesome:

Oh boy do I love these kind of messages. I dug my outfit out of the closet and got to work on making some dinner. I had planned to make Spaghetti but opted for Sloppy Joes when I realized I didn’t have any noodles.

Unfortunately I didn’t get any pics of the Pink Cadillac Dance or our super cute outfits because my phone was acting up again.

Friday

Friday was Moon Day and we celebrated with some Moon Pies for an afternoon snack. That morning we finished up the laundry for the week and caught up on few things that needed done around the house.

After paying a couple of bills I went ahead and renewed our ABC Mouse that the kids have been begging for. They wasted no time getting on their and taking care of their virtual pets. Joey also made sure to update his avatar:

Those glasses look almost like his and they are just too cute!

That afternoon I went to make some our favorite Cream Cheese Chicken with Rice and Green Beans only to realize I didn’t have any cream of chicken soup… I don’t know what happened when I went grocery shopping last week but I guess I didn’t do a good job. I did finish dinner and it was really good with the substitutions I made so I’ll try to get that updated recipe posted soon.

That evening we went to the square dance. Again I didn’t get any pics because my phone died but I did get that video finished. I’ll have it at the end of the post.

Saturday

I had planned to get the porch cleaned up a bit but the constant thunderstorms kept us inside. The morning was spent tidying up around the house and then we went out to eat at Golden Corral. It wasn’t the best experience and we probably won’t visit that location again but the kids enjoyed it.

After eating we headed to the movies to watch the new Ant Man movie. It was pretty good and everyone had a great time. All in all it was a good week and we are really looking forward to a great time in the upcoming week.

This week I plan to get some of the lessons entered into the Homeschool Manager app and also set a date for us to start school. I will also be working on a couple of more promo videos for square dancing as many clubs will be starting classes in September.

As far as cleaning the FlyLady missions will be in the Master Bedroom this week. I just need to do a tidying up in there so I’m not really sure how much I will get done in there. I would really like to get the porch cleaned off and have some usable space out there but the weather hasn’t been cooperating.

What are your goals for the upcoming week?

Below are some other things that we’ve done this past week and that video we put out for square dancing.

Other books we’ve read this week were:

Be A Good Dragon is a cute book about a dragon with a cold.

Yum! A Preston Pig Story is a variation of the ‘Three Little Pigs’ that kids enjoyed.

We got lots of goodies in the mail this week:

  Merriam-Webster’s First Dictionary

Merriam-Webster’s Rhyming Dictionary

Circle Time Activities

Social and Emotional Learning in Middle School: Essential Lessons for Student Success

All Thru the School Year: 540 Reward Stickers

Nature Adventures! A Guidebook of Nature Facts, Songs, and Hikes in San Diego County

Animal Tracks: North American Animals A to Z

I was really excited to get these books and hopefully the kids will get to use them some this weekend.

 Dr. Seuss Read-Along Set

This week I also posted these posts here (which may have affiliate links to some of the products above):

One Person’s Boredom Is Another’s Security

Amazon Back To School Lightning Deals: July 20, 2018

Kirby’s Kids: Our 2018-2019 Homeschool Curriculum Reveal

Nanny’s No Bake Coconut Cream Pie

Moon Day

Haystacks aka Noodle Cookies

We are looking forward to a new week with lots of new surprises. So far we have these activities planned.

Upcoming Events/Holidays:

AMELIA EARHART DAY July 24

AUNT AND UNCLE DAY July 26

Here is that video I promised:

Elephant Fuzz, Building Bugs, Poodle Skirts and Moon Day; A Week In Review We have had quite the week again. Fun and crazy as usual. Keep reading to find out about some of our many adventures here in the little house on the pond.