cianmars

[cianmars]

Pour one out for a real one.

[cianmars]

you can take the white man out of apartheid south africa………

[cianmars]

Okie-dokie.

[cianmars]

evan "little bitch" buckley

[cianmars]

[cianmars]

my mom didn’t believe in lying to children so when I first asked about santa claus as a small child she was like “oh santa claus is another name for a man named saint nicholas who lived a long time ago. he was a very kind and generous man and he loved giving people presents and he would do things like put presents in people’s stockings when they were hung up to dry by the fire, so they would find them and be surprised. so now when we give presents at christmas it’s fun to pretend saint nicholas or ‘santa claus’ brings them. and we hang up stockings by the fire and when we get up in the morning there are presents in them, just like if saint nicholas was still alive to bring them!”

so that thanksgiving one of my uncles said jovially “so mac, are you being good for santa claus?” and little (not quite three year old) mac looked up and raised an eyebrow and said witheringly “he’s dead.”

[cianmars]

why do people think victorian orphans were like. the peak of sheltered pure innocence

[cianmars]

Idk y'all you're gonna have to ask @she-is-27-i-checked on this one

[cianmars]

every winter solstice I am consumed with thoughts of Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost...

[cianmars]

fuck all that. in 2025 we are doing nothing

[cianmars]

Tumblr staff: ten options is enough for polls, right? No one needs more than that on a regular basis. The average tumblr user: Hey guys which element of the periodic table do you think is the most fuckable?

[cianmars]

[cianmars]

new trend called 'heavenmaxxing' basically where you be really kind to others and help little old ladies cross the road & stuff

[cianmars]

[cianmars]

you fuckers thought i forgot about elf practice didn’t you?

[cianmars]

just saw in some stupid medical drama someone burst into the hospital with an injured person over their shoulder and they said "is anyone here a doctor????" . that's so fucking dumb. thats like going into a rock climbing gym and saying "does anyone wanna start a podcast????" like thats the only people who go there dipshit

[cianmars]