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#I would be happy to share but I didn’t want to add a bunch because I know it’s not for everyone
ssreeder · 4 months
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hi sreedyy
do u have any general music recommendations? u already know my music recommendations (im still hyperfixated on sarah kinsley LOL)
can u also link the liab playlist :)
HELLLOOOOO!!!!!!ok so music. first of all: LIAB PLAYLIST (playlist & I are working to update the ITF one so… yeah lol ((if you see this playlist ill DM you back I swear I lub you)))
Other than that here’s some songs I’ve listened to this week (I just went through recently played and looked that way sorry I am not very organized) lol
I listen to a lot of instumental music… and because I am editing thats what I’m primarily listening to right now, but I didn’t list any of those here, so if you want any instrumental songs let me know & ill add them :)
RANDOM SONGS FROM MY RECENTLY PLAYED: (when I say random I mean randoom)
Rise Against: Re-Educatio (Through Labor) ((& Savior)
Burn - Phillipa Soo
Still Frame - Trapt
The Bad Touch - Bloodhound Gang
Salad - Blondshell
Juke Box Hero - Foreigner
The Wolf - SIAMES
I’m So Sorry - Imagine Dragons
Red Flags - Tom Cardy & Montaigne (I listen to this song as least once a day haha)
Become the Beast - Karliene (I listen to a lot of her music I like fantsy vibes)
I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE - Maneskin & Iggy Pop (I like GASOLINE by them too)
Bells in Santa Fe - Halsey (I like her music a lot too)
I know A Place - MUNA
Take a Chance on Me - ABBA (they have great songs too)
Don’t Look Back - Rick & Morty (TRUST ME, its on my Zukka list haha)
Do You Feel It? - Chaos Chaos
Aria - Argy & Omnya
Gonna Love Ya - Avicii
Alone - Marshmello
Gasoline - Halsey
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beomiracles · 2 months
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hiii! i’ve never requested before but as i’m stalking *tehe* your account- OMG U WRITE SO GOOD BSFR
can i request something like a cosplayer!gf x soobin? yk he’s such a weeb & a nerd, i js know he would love a cosplayer gf (not only ‘cause i do cosplay lmao). Maybe some smut-ish?
TYSMMM, i hope u take the request babes <33
⌞ 𝐃𝐔𝐌𝐁 𝐁𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐘 ⌝
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DREAM RECALL Soobin knows that he should feel ashamed, but he can't help it. He wants nothing but to see his girlfriend completely ruined before him.
wc -> 2.8k
pairings soobin x cosplayer!gf warnings perv!soobin, masturbation (m), vaginal fingering, overstimulation (f), dacryphilia, unprotected sex + creampie, teetering on the edge of dub-con at some points, soobin calls reader "bunny", reader wears bunny ears !
#serene adds ✎ hii omg tysm eek that makes me super happy to hear >.< I tried my best, I'm not a cosplayer myself so I might've gotten some things wrong, but I think it's such a cool thing to be able to do ! this might not be exactly what you wanted, I think I got a little carried away, I hope it's still an enjoyable read nonetheless :3
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It was really no secret that Soobin liked your cosplays. How he would so often brag about his girlfriend who could transform into just about anyone. Not to mention the several times he watched you get ready with big fascinated eyes as he asked you tons of questions, or went out of his way to buy you the things you needed. So no, it wasn’t exactly a secret that he liked it. Well, maybe a little, maybe he hadn’t told you just how much he really enjoyed it. 
Some of them were fine, the costumes that made him giggle, the ones that were unique and funky. But some made his breath catch in his throat as he shoved a pillow over his lap. The flimsy short dresses, the tight tops, the jewelry that dangled from your neck. Even the fluffy bunny ears you once put on made him rethink his morals. — He doesn’t know how to approach it, if he should say something, or just keep quiet. Would you be disgusted with him or would you be just as turned on? He didn’t know but the thought was slowly eating him away. 
You didn’t exactly make things easier. Always sauntering about in your revealing costumes, making his dick strain uncomfortably in his briefs as he tears his gaze away. He knows that you love what you do, catching you smiling and laughing as you edit your videos, always excited to talk about your next costume. Soobin doesn’t want to ruin something you hold so dearly just because of his perverted mind. Yet he can’t help but replay the scene in his head, over and over until his hand moves down his pants on its own. 
Short fluffy skirt bunched up over your stomach, your tits bouncing in rhythm with each harsh thrust of his as your bottom lip quivers, big bunny ears flopping down the sides of your face as your dainty nails claw at his arms. — Fuck, Soobin knows it’s bad. So why can’t he stop?    
Things get no better when you call out for him that evening, your squeaky voice echoing through the walls of your apartment. He gets up from the couch, dragging his feet over to your shared bedroom, pushing the slightly ajar door open before his eyes almost shot out of their sockets. — “Can you help me zip this up?” You whine as you struggle with the zipper of your short dress. The lacey material was just the kind that immediately got his mind reeling and Soobin fumbled for words before eventually nodding, awkwardly stumbling inside the room. 
His big hands are clumsy on your back as he twists at the locking mechanisms of your garment, his brows deeply furrowed as he tries to get it right. “M-Maybe it’s broken”, you huff, making a small grimace as he tugs at the costume. Soobin only shakes his head, “no it’ll work”, he mutters, intent on seeing you in the skimpy piece of clothing. And at last he does get it, heaving a small sigh he takes a step back as you admire yourself in the mirror. 
“Thank you, babe!” You chirp, rushing to give his cheek a small peck before setting up your phone. “Do you wanna watch?” — Your innocent question sends blood straight to his groin and he has to blink twice before comprehending your words. “I…sure”, he nods, moving to sit by the edge of the bed, securely out of view from your camera. 
You had explained multiple times how you filmed your content, lip syncing to different songs and sometimes having full on dialogues. But Soobin finds himself unable to focus on anything besides how your tits moved as you redid take after take, huffing when you got something wrong as you pulled at the colorful wig on your head. 
His eyes are glued to the way the dress slides up your thighs, frowning as your hand wraps around the fabric to pull it down again. He bites the inside of his cheek, shifting uncomfortably on the plush mattress as he watches you bend forward to mess with the settings on your phone, your soft tits almost spilling out of the tight costume. — He knows that he’s done for if you turn around right now, and he swallows, fingers curling around the blanket beneath him. 
He should leave, actually he should probably have left right away, but his greedy mind just couldn’t say no. It takes everything in him to tear his gaze from you, quickly removing himself from the bed as he heads for the door, though your voice makes him freeze in his tracks. “Where are you going, Binnie?” He can practically hear the pout on your lips and he has to bite back a small groan. “Just the bathroom”, he mumbles, hoping that you won’t catch on to how strained his voice had become. 
Your obliviousness is endearing as you give a small “okay”, and the immense wave of guilt washing over him is almost unbearable. Yet his demanding arousal wins him over and as soon as the bathroom door shuts behind him does his hand slip past the hem of his sweats. — Letting his head fall back against the cool tiles, Soobin exhales as his fingers wrap around his aching cock, groaning as he tugs on it. No matter how hard he tries not to, the image of you in the room down the hall clouds his vision. 
It wasn’t like it was unwarranted, right? You were his girlfriend, so why did he feel so shameful over jacking off to the silly little costumes you wore? But the thought of confronting what he thought to be a bizarre kink, felt almost worse than jerking it off in secret. You’d probably be disgusted with him, Soobin thinks so at least. And that’s the last thing he wants. 
He takes a cold shower after that, trying his hardest to scrub away the shame and the guilt. It never worked. He feels just as hot when he steps out again, almost like he was running a fever, an incurable one. — You ask him about his sudden disappearance at dinner but he merely brushes it off. And you’re so naive, believing every single word passing his lying lips. 
Not even when he’s balls deep inside of you that night, thick cock ramming into your throbbing cunt, can he get the thoughts out of his head. His mind works overtime as it conjures image after image of you all dressed up for him, your makeup smudged by the tears that streamed down your face as he brings you to orgasm after orgasm. — Only snapping out of his haze when your whiny voice pierces the air, “B-Binnie, s’too much!” — “Fuck, sorry Bunny”, the petname slips out without him thinking twice and it isn’t until he catches your small frown that he realizes his mistake. 
“You’ve never called me that before..” You sound hesitant and Soobin stills inside of you. “Ah.. No I suppose I haven’t”, he huffs, clearing his throat rather awkwardly, “if you don’t like it I-” — “No, I do.” He blinks, unmoving as he swallows, did he hear that right? The tiny confirmation sends him spiraling and he reconnects your lips in a kiss, thinking, hoping, that maybe he’d be able to get just a step closer to what his twisted mind desired. 
⸝⸝
Sometimes it was almost like the universe liked to pull pranks on Soobin. Or maybe it was karma? It had to be one of the two, because he nearly drops his phone as you come skipping down the hallway, dressed in nothing but a fluffy skirt and a cute sparkly top. — You immediately begin rambling on about the character you’re portraying as you twirl before him, modeling the look. But Soobin isn’t listening, in fact he’s barely heard a word you’ve said, even as his gaze trains on your glossy lips. You always did your makeup nice, but today you had gone all out, pink cheeks matching the shadow around your eyes, and he could’ve sworn you used something akin to glitter on the tip of your nose. 
“Do you like it?” You wonder, twisting the flimsy skirt between your fingers as you await his response. Soobin’s eyes find yours, wide and curious meeting his lustful and near pleading ones. There’s really only one thing he can say. — “You should put the bunny ears on.” 
You frown, the confusion is evident on your pretty face as your pink lips part. “The bunny ears? But they don’t even have anything to do with this costume, silly!” — “I know.” He shrugs, feigning nonchalance but the way desire swirls behind his gaze surely gives him away. You bite the inside of your cheek, appearing almost conflicted as you rock back and forth on the sole of your feet. “Binnie, don’t you think–” 
“I think”, he interrupts, shifting against the sofa before he continues, “that you should put them on and go lay down on our bed.” — Your jaw slacks as your fingers, previously tangled up in your skirt, drops to your sides, sure you were used to Soobin being commanding but this was something completely new. Then your eyes drift to the bulge in his pants, wondering how it could’ve passed your notice before, and you nod, slowly turning on your heel as you head for the bedroom. 
Soobin lets his head fall back against the couch with a soft groan. Running a hand through his hair, he slowly considers what he was about to go through with. But not before long does he get up to head after you. — The door is ajar, letting him catch a glimpse of the bed before he pushes it open. He finds you perched on the mattress, knees tucked under you as you fiddle with the fluffy ears on your head. When you see him entering you immediately make a move to lie down, visibly gulping as he reaches the bed in three long strides. 
This was far from anything the two of you had done before. You supposed that some might even call your sex life a bit vanilla. While it wasn’t something you had given much thought, Soobin most definitely seemed to have as he looms over you. — You looked so pretty, so perfectly put together, and he wanted nothing more than to see you ruined. 
His large hand is on your cheek, gently caressing the pink hues as he sends you a loving look. “Gorgeous bunny”, he murmurs, pulling your plump bottom lip down, your sticky gloss smearing all over his thumb as he pushes it inside your mouth. He’s pleasantly surprised when you eagerly swirl your tongue around it, coating his finger in your saliva. You keep your eyes on him the whole time, the small eye contact makes his cock practically jump in his pants and he retracts his thumb with a grunt. 
Eagerly he hikes the fluffy skirt up above your stomach. The cotton panties you wore underneath were nothing special, you hadn’t exactly planned for things to take such an intimate turn but Soobin’s breath still catches in his throat as his fingers trace the lining. — “So soft”, he exhales, hand dipping inside the thin garment as his long fingers slide between your folds, making you suck in a sharp breath as your teeth latch onto your painted lip. 
Driven by the fantasies conjured in his far too imaginative mind, it’s almost as if he’s taken on a completely different persona. The uncharacteristic look in his eyes makes you throb against him, his saliva coated thumb skimming over your clit, has you crying out as he quickly pushes a finger inside of your clenching hole. — He wants to ease you into it, take it slow, like he usually did, but there’s something urging him on today. Desperate to see you ruined by his hand, Soobin quickly adds a second finger, not slowing down as he hears you wail, cute nails practically ripping the sheets apart as your thighs twitch. 
His free hand tugs your panties down, leaving them by your knees as he grows impatient, his attention returning to your slick core; watching intently as your arousal trails down the back of his hand. Soobin was a gentle lover, he loved taking his time as he watches your face morph into pleasurable expressions, he loved hearing your small gasps and moans as he slides himself inside of you before gently picking up his pace. But none of that lingers today.  
Neither the shame nor bashfulness exists within him any longer. He can’t bring himself to care when you look so pretty beneath him, whimpering as you orgasm around his fingers, his name falling from your lips like it was second nature. — “N-No s’too much!” You whine as his fingers continue to spread your puffy folds, but Soobin’s too far gone already. “S’okay bunny, I’m gonna make you feel so good”, he murmurs, planting a tender kiss to your forehead and you preen under him. 
Sweat has dribbled down your face, causing your makeup to crease but Soobin only groans at the sight, his large hand feverishly working to free his throbbing cock from the confinement of his pants. — Your quiet cry when his tip meets your clit makes his chest swell as he lets himself become coated in the remnants of your previous high. “Binnie”, the nickname makes him twitch as his gaze flickers up to meet yours. Your bottom lip wobbles, short pants emitting from deep within your throat and your eyes are wide. Fuck you look gorgeous.
Soobin thinks he might come the second he slips past your wet folds, your overstimulated cunt sucking him in like never before and you whimper at the stretch of his thick cock. He starts out slow, like he usually did, though his restraints quickly snap as his pace becomes near unbearable. His eyes focus on the way your tits move with each thrust, their rhythmical bounce as they strain against the sparkly top makes him groan as he increases his force. — He traps one of your floppy bunny ears between his fingers, feeling the soft material against his open palm before he tugs on it, making you whine as your back arches off the mattress. 
“Prettiest little bunny I’ve ever seen”, he grunts, his hips slamming against yours with such force that you let out a small hiccup. Your hands move to his shoulders, pretty nails digging into the flesh there as you meekly nod, jaw slacking as you blink up at him. — His thumb is on your lips again, except this time he’s smearing your pink gloss across your cheek and chin, wanting you to look nothing but ravaged when he’s done with you. 
He can tell that you’re having a hard time keeping up, the tears welling in your eyes a clear indicator. “S-Slow down, Binnie!” You sniffle, your grip on his upper arms becoming near deadly. And any other day he would’ve complied in a heartbeat, scooping you into his arms as he coddled you, but he needs to see you ruined, he can’t stop now. — The first droplet to fall from your eyes makes him let out a strangled noise as his cock twitches deep inside of you. The ones that follow manage to smear your perfect makeup, leaving streaks on your pink tinted cheeks. 
Your quiet sobs are interrupted by breathy moans as his index and middle finger swirls around your throbbing clit. “Hnng, I’m g-gonna.. p-please let me..” Your incoherent pleas only make his mind spin, adding to the sensation of having you completely wrecked before him. His large palm against your tear stained cheek is near trembling as he leans in to press a chaste kiss to your lips. “S’okay bunny, I’ve got you.” He presses reassuring pecks to your face, covering you in his love as he feels you clench around him, pulling a sharp hiss between his gritted teeth as you finish around his cock. 
Once the wave of intense pleasure subsides you’re left a whimpering mess as Soobin abuses your spent cunt, using it however he pleases as he thrusts into you without showing any signs of slowing down. — You looked so perfect like this, your once pretty costume completely disheveled all thanks to him. Your mind is nothing but a hazy fog as you gaze up at him, letting him have his way with you because you’re nothing but a dumb bunny, his dumb bunny. 
He lets his head fall to the crook of your neck as his hips stutter, making sure to fill your pretty little cunt with as much of his seed as possible, preserving it by slowly fucking his soft cock into you despite your wails. — “You’re okay”, he murmurs, pressing tender kisses to your sweat covered neck as he slumps against your chest. “So perfect for me”, he sighs as he leans up to catch a glimpse of your face. He finds a small grin playing on your lips, making his heart flutter almost agonizingly as he props himself up to place a kiss to that very smile.
Such a perfectly dumb bunny, he thinks.  
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vhagarlovebot · 2 years
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JUST A FRIEND TO YOU.
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♡. ── gif credit. ; ( aemond targaryen masterlist. )
pairing: modern!aemond x fem!reader
summary: you and aemond are best friends. you are in love with him, aemond is not.
warnings: angst, angst, angst.
note: if there are any mistakes i apologize, english is not my first language! hope you enjoy.
read part two here.
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BEST FRIENDS— they would do anything for each other. that’s why you didn’t hesitate to help aemond when you saw him being cornered by one of the cheerleaders at a party. she was all over him, long nails being dragged across his chest while he looked uncomfortable.
it took her a good couple of minutes to understand what you were saying as you held aemond’s hand. it wasn’t until he wrapped his arm around your waist and gave you a quick kiss on your temple, that she finally understood. she looked defeated and didn’t stop looking at you for the whole night.
you were just helping a friend. and you know aemond would have done the same thing for you.
however, what you didn’t expected was for the rumor of you two dating to spread so fast. and it didn’t bother you, really, because aemond was fine with that too, joking around and treating you like his girlfriend in front of everyone. it was completely different at how he acted before and that confuses you. is he pretending? does he feel the same way you feel about him? because if that’s the case, then maybe, just maybe, you can finally tell him how you feel. no more hiding your feelings for your best friend.
but as you’re walking to the coffee shop you and aemond agreed to meet, you find yourself stopping abruptly.
there he is. leaning against a tree while a blonde girl is close, very close, to him —she clearly doesn’t know anything about personal space—. and you recognize the long and pink nails immediately: it’s the same girl from the party. but this time aemond doesn’t look uncomfortable, quite the opposite.
aemond is an attractive man. he knows that and everyone in campus knows that too. he has that kind of smile that makes you weak in the knees the second you see it. add to the mix his pair of big and bright blue eyes and you can find a bunch of girls falling at his feet. so it’s not weird seeing girls around campus smiling and trying to flirt with him at parties. and it is not weird that you, like any other girl, fell for him.
but you were there first. you fell for him long before any of those girls and boys knew the new version of aemond. you fell for him the second he helped you off the ground in the park, after one of the big boys pushed you. he wiped the tears from your face and cleaned your favorite shirt. and then, he shared his juice box with you, sitting by your side until you stopped crying. since that moment you were inseparable.
and you would be lying if you say you didn’t try everything in your power to stop falling for him. you tried to distance yourself from him but one way or another, you always found your way back to him. instead you chose to hide them, to buried them deep inside your chest because you thought it was going to be enough. how wrong you were.
aemond smiles down at the girl, who doesn’t need to try very hard to keep his attention because aemond does not even turn around when one of his classmates calls for him.
you swallow your tears, putting on a brave face, and you just keep walking and walking and walking until you can no longer hear her laugh.
thirty minutes later and two cups of coffee finished, aemond sits in front of you. he’s smiling and his eyes are soft, and you know what’s coming.
“i’m so sorry! i was busy and lost track of time.” he says, reaching for your hand, but you quickly grab your cup.
“it’s okay,” you simply say, shrugging.
“it’s not, ‘m going to make it up to you.” you don’t want to argue, so you just smile and that is enough to relax him. “i have news.”
oh no, please no.
“i have a date.” you try to look surprised and happy for him, but the lump in your throat is making it difficult. “remember the girl from the party last friday? the one you scared away?”
“scared away? i thought i was doing you a favor.”
aemond laughs, shaking his head. “i thought you were drunk and that’s why you did what you did?”
“you looked uncomfortable.” you state but aemond smiles grows wider, and you don’t understand a thing.
“believe me, i was not.” he raises his hand to one of the girl baristas and she smiles at him, nodding. aemond doesn’t even need to say a word to have a cup of coffee in front of him in no time. “y’know how everyone thinks we’re dating?”
you blush, immediately hiding your face behind your hands as you pretend to cough.
“well, i hope you don’t hate me for keeping up with the act.”
with the act.
you’re sure everyone on the coffee shop can hear the exact moment in which your heart breaks.
“but it was actually beneficial.”
“how’s that?” you pretend to busy yourself with your almost empty cup.
“i said i was going to make it up to you, right?” you nod, and aemond leans in, like he wants to share a secret. “i got you a date. this saturday.”
“what?” you frown and suddenly you want to slap that stupid smile out of his face. “what are you talking about?”
aemond sighs, like he’s getting tired of your questions.
“well, this girl,” he starts. you fight the urge to roll your eyes. “she just agreed to go out with me if you go out with one of her friends, to make sure we’re not really dating.”
“she didn’t believe you?”
“no, it’s just…” his head hangs low as he tries to avoid making eye contact. “i asked her if she had a friend for you.”
“you did what?” a few heads turn around but you don’t care about making a scene. “i don’t need your pity.”
“it is not that, please.” he says, reaching for your hand and caressing your wrist with his thumb. “you need to get out more, to meet new people. i— i won’t always have time to hang out with you, as much as i love being with you.” you show no emotion and he leans in a little more. “i’m just asking you to go out with him, you don’t need to go on a second date. but i really want things to work with this girl and…” you raise your brows, waiting for him to continue. “i love you, you’re my best friend.”
aemond pouts and your heart skips a beat. he never begs, so you know he’s being honest when he says that he wants things to work out with the girl. he wouldn’t be asking you to do it if that weren’t the case. and that doesn’t make you feel any better. but hey…
best friends— they would do anything for each other, right?
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So I was asked by the wonderful @beardedladyqueen to do a writer ask game! Thank you so much for the ask! This was super fun and enjoyable to do! ❤️ Update: I’ve fixed the blog media sharing because I didn’t realize it was turned off.
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❤️ Favorite line:
“Tavriel came upon a clearing in the dark forest. The moon shining overhead and the sound of a nearby waterfall filling the space almost entranced her. She stepped softly into the grass, feeling the first taste of dew chill her toes as she walked. Her pace had slowed as she took in the sights around her. The grass, the trees, the babbling water nearby, and finally, the heavens above.”
Okay technically it’s not one line, but it’s still my favorite. It’s a line from Chapter 1 of Simply Transactional, an Astarion x named Tav two chapter story. It’s the first story I wrote for Baldur’s Gate 3 and the first piece of fan fiction I’ve written in about a decade. This was the first little snippet I wrote and decided to go through will a full story. It’s not super powerful or impactful, but it’s special to me because it’s the single line that brought me back into writing fiction. Also about my first Tav that I’m still emotionally connected to and this poor girl just needs some fresh air and a peaceful night.
💥Change one canon event:
I really, really wish there was an interaction between Ketheric Thorm and Isobel. (to be fair I’ve never let Isobel be taken at Last Light so idk if there is an interaction or not, but either way I’ve never seen it.) Ketheric Thorm is one of my favorite villains in recent gaming history because his story is so beautifully tragic (not the mention the whole avatar of Myrkul thing makes me so happy because I love anything remotely spooky) and I would have loved to have seen something between Ketheric and Isobel. His entire reason for turning to Shar and eventually the Absolute/Myrkul/The Chosen is essentially because of her death.
And I’m aware that he knows she’s been resurrected, but he went to such great lengths to bring her back and was ultimately driven to utter despair that a confrontation or something between them would have been nice. And while I understand the reasoning of Isobel not wanting to see her father and not want to give that piece of information away to literally anyone until after his death, I just want more angst.
And just more Ketheric content in general. J.K. Simmons did such a good job with the role and I would have loved so much more content with him.
Bonus event: I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, let me give Barcus Wroot a lil platonic forehead kiss and/or a hug after we kill Wulbren Bongle. He needs it.
✍️ Ideal writing setup:
Ideally I’d use a desktop on a desk with a chair. I currently use my laptop or the notes app on my phone when I’m out in the world, and they work but realistically I’d do much better if I could sit up and write. I have to work on stories after I get off work and if I get on the couch or in bed to start writing, I’ll get two sentences in and the next thing I know I’m taking a nap. And of course that just makes writing take longer because I certainly don’t want to write right after a nap.
🚀 Outline or write as you go:
So I used to do outlines way back in the day, but now I don’t. I probably should because my current writing method is a little chaotic at best. 😬 I always know what I want the story to do and where it goes before I start writing, but I don’t write it in order. I tend to write whatever is rotting my brain first, so usually I end up jumping around and doing the story in chunks. A lot of the time I’ll also write out a bunch of the dialogue and then go back in and add the details/fluff/scene setting. I will also put like general ideas in all caps so I don’t forget the order of things. (Caps so I don’t accidentally leave that in and I’ll see it.)
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antigonewinchester · 11 months
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ooh share something about hesitation or triptych? <3
I will self-indulgently to do both <3
Hesitation but IC is inspired by a Destiel fic called, surprise surprise, Hesitation, written by apokteino, who I think was a fairly prominent fic writer back in the day? She had a series of dark Destiel fics, including Hesitation, the Bone series, the When series, and most infamously With Understanding. I find her work interesting intellectually, in her focus on exploring questions around sexual violence, relationships formed under duress, and the complexities of perpetrators & victims & their dynamics, but it feels like she maps her ideas onto SPN rather than centering canon characterizations or dynamics (at least in my read of the show/characters).
So, I decided to try my hand at a fic with the same premise but more in line with canon, particularly taking into account Cas's control/power over Dean in S4 (and which I don't feel is negated just because of Cas's sexual inexperience, altho it does add some complexity) and Dean's full experience in Hell. Part 1 is from Dean’s POV and Part 2, which I’m currently working on, is from Cas’s:
“You told me Dean wanted to have sex with me. He did, and then he didn’t.” Zachariah and he are sitting at a bar in New York, the city. It’s night, but he can’t see any stars, only the glowing of offices and apartments and advertisements against the sky. One large, flashing sign reads: Open Happiness. The moon is a cut of pure white. The humans around them talk and whisper, blissfully ignorant of the angels and the war they’re fighting to protect them. Their breath forms clouds that rise to disappear into the dark. All are dressed in what he believes are fancy clothes, long flowing red fabrics and unwrinkled suits of black, but he’s no longer sure how much he knows about humanity. Zachariah shrugs. “Humans say they want one thing, then do another, and Dean Winchester is no exception. This is why they need Heaven’s hand, Castiel.” The woman sitting to his left laughs. The man she’s talking with has taken her palm and put it up against his. Her fingernails had been carefully painted in stripes of white and black.
Triptych is sort of the opposite end of the spectrum, in that it’s my attempt at a Dean/Jack fic after looking on AO3 and finding... 2 decent fics of the whole bunch.
I started out as just wanting to do Dean/Jack during S14, but its slowly turned into Dean/Jack in the aftermath of Dean/John, probably in part 'cause I started writing it in the midst of Utena rewatch, which all about memories & cycles & incest & eternity (and then when I got to the part of S14 where Dean suggested locking himself in a coffin for eternity to save the world...) I was also struck by a post of someone discussing a common Utena interpretation that one character didn't actually want to sleep with her brother, but the poster asked if she did, would that desire negate any harm? Does wanting something "bad" mean you can't be hurt by it? If a relationship was both meaningful & hurts you, how do those elements go together?
Got a bit stalled out on this one because Holy Shit the emotional complexities here, and I want to handle it respectfully? Not be gauche? My plan is to have it all lead up to 14x20 and Thee Dean Jack Moment, re-contextualizing it within the scope of my fic, but I'm still figuring out what it all... adds up to, I suppose. (Also that I'm bad at writing character being mean, and Dean has to be mean in this fic, at least for parts of it!)
Heaven turned out to be the world’s best movie night: his favorite memories playing over and over and over again. The road trip where Sam introduced him to Harry Potter and Dean taught him how to read a paper map. He could rewind and play through his favorite five minutes as many times as he wanted. He could make everything faster or slower, which was funny for a little while, but he stopped after it got weird, like when he repeated a word too much and suddenly something would change and it wouldn’t be a real word anymore, just meaningless sounds. He could change from memory to memory in an instant, if he really wanted, but mostly he liked to let them play out before he moved onto another. And once he got to end, it was back to the beginning: a conversation trailed off or a lesson finished and then he was back at the start, to Cas’s reassuring smile, telling him about mistakes and guilt and forgiveness, or Sam’s bright concern, telling him how to take a punch, or Dean’s warm hand on his back, telling him where north was. The one thing he couldn’t do was imagine anything new. He tried, at first, in the memory of that day with Dean, how their conversation at the river could have gone—Dean’s voice low as he’d whispered, “Come here,” and then—and then—but it never worked. Guiltily he’d moved onto other memories, and at least they were too the same: if he'd ordered a hot dog, all he could eat is a hot dog; if Sam and Dean had driven past the apple orchard on a hunt, there was no turning down the short dirt road to pick fruit instead.
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ruminate88 · 4 months
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the entertainer in me:
I taught myself how to play the piano when I was five years old. I wrote my first piano piece when I was nine years old titled, “far away place”. I got to play that piece in the fifth grade at school. Some teachers were impressed because they had labeled me with a “learning disability”. I guess they didn’t believe I could really do anything smart like that…
in middle school, I performed in both the sixth grade and seventh grade talent shows, but I wasn’t very popular because I played songs that I had written on the piano. They were tunes from my heart . Kids made comments to me like, “what, are you mozarts sister?” 🤨 I mean, Mozart, pretty famous but what are you trying to say?? lol They asked me why I “sway” when I play the piano…. I mean, cuz I got feeling and passion!! What do you all got??
Most of the girls who got attention in the sixth and seventh grade were cheerleaders and that’s who the guys looked at and gawked at. 😝 I didn’t think any guy would ever look at me because I was an “entertainer” aka an artistic weirdo!! I just felt misunderstood. I wrote songs alone in my room almost every day of my life. It’s all I wanted to do. It was the only place I felt comfortable or like I could fit in. I never got along with popular kids in school. I was always on the outside watching guys point at the cheerleaders and say how hot they were. I just shrugged my shoulders cuz I didn’t even like sports 😝 lol I just wanted to make music 🎶
I felt stupid in school but felt intelligent when I’m alone on my piano, pouring my soul out into every song I make. I had no confidence otherwise. I couldn’t even look people in the eyes. I just focused on the piano. I was only happy when I’m playing music in a crowd. That’s the only time I feel “authentically me” is when I’m performing….
I’ve had A LOT of criticism on my music and the piano but I’ve also been noticed by many celebrities. (Not that it changed anything for me, I still was and am now a no name with no confidence) I’ve never gave up on making music!! I’ve been in multiple bands and played many many weddings. Written songs for brides to walk down the aisle. I’ve been a “people person” but ONLY when I’m performing. Otherwise, I’m shy & uncomfortable. I don’t trust people anymore since I’ve been emotionally abused 😭😭😭
I LIVE to be in front of a crowed. That’s when I’m most alive. My husband has “social anxiety” & he’s TERRIFIED of a crowed 🥺😳 He says he’s nervous to watch me get up in front of people…. Ahhhh noooo…. He’s a musician too but he gets stage fright and he’s not good with a bunch of people. He’s so opposite of me. lol it’s frustrating cuz I wanna share the lime light with my man. I just want to celebrate music, my passion, with him!!! 😌
Maybe one day my man will overcome his stage fright & join me. If not, oh well. Guess I’ll have to perform alone. 🥺🙏🏻 I would not travel the world to tour, that’s too exhausting haha I don’t like to leave my couch, much less cross the bridge into the next state LOL but I still write music to this day. I pour my heart & soul into music & no matter if I’m still misunderstood or not, music will ALWAYS be my passion & my world. I don’t idolize celebrities like I did when I was a teenager but I have my favorite bands and Djs 🎶😍
I often add songs when I’m making a post becuase music connects my feelings to my words ❤️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Here’s one of my favorite songs I recorded:
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boogerboii · 2 years
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.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Black fem reader
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✩ Alreck is one of the oldest vampires of his kind and one of the strongest.
✩ There is only one more vampire of his kind and that is his sister Amarande.
✩ Alreck and his sister were turned by a crazed king and queen who took a bunch of children from a small village and performed witchcraft on them to make a strong army only 10 children survived including him and his sister.
✩ Later on after learning how to use their new found power they killed the king and queen and ruled in chaos.
✩ The vampires nowadays have gone through vestigiality. They have lost their strength and speed. They are not as strong as the vampires before in any way.
✩ Alreck has now calmed down since his reign of terror on the world long ago.
✩ He finds human life precious now because his sister always reminds him how they used to be human before it was taken away from them.
✩ He is now quiet and observant. When he talks it’s calculated.
✩ When he first saw you he was calculated on what to say. He had watched you for a week wondering what to say to you but he saw that you noticed him so he said nothing.
✩ You were an observant person too so you saw him at the coffee shop a couple times staring at you.
✩ You were the one to talk to him. He was not surprised just as he was admiring you he heard you turn to your coworker and say that he was a creep.
✩ You walked up to him and asked what his problem was. He replied “I’ve never seen a woman so perfect in all my years. Sorry if I came off as strange.” He tilted his head at you. He seemed genuine.
✩ He then asked you for your time. Which you accepted but at the end of your shift.
✩ Then that was the start of your relationship with Alreck.
✩ Being in a relationship with Alreck is a lot
✩ He thinks a lot but doesn’t say much unless you ask and pick his mind. He’s not used to sharing his feelings to other people besides his sister.
✩ He’s used to being in charge and doing things his own way. So when you're added to the picture he can easily add you to his schedule but he takes control. For example after you two called it official he gave you the option to stop working. You can just say he’s old school.
✩ He loves your hair especially your natural hair. He honestly loves any hairstyle on you and he will buy you all the hair supplies and lace fronts in all colors if you like. He just wants you to be happy.
✩ He loves to buy you little presents for the smallest achievements. Like if you had a knack for crystals he would buy you some to add to your collection.
✩ He is a very clean man. In his early years of being a vampire he didn’t care for many things and thinking back on it, it's embarrassing for him. Not that he was dirty but it didn’t concern him at the time. Now he’s a very groomed man. He smells good and always looks good. There is never really a time you see him in casual clothing but when you do he looks hot in it.
✩ He loves to read when he was a kid his mother would read books to him. Reading is one of the things that brings him comfort when being a vampire. So if you love to read he would ask you to come read to him as he lays his head on your lap.
✩ He loves to spoil his significant other whatever you want it’s yours no matter what it is.
✩Amarande his sister comes around frequently. She scared you at first but now she is the funniest person ever. Her relationship with her brother is so sweet.
✩Alreck is the calm quiet sibling and Amarande is the intimidating sibling but together they look scary.
✩Alreck owns many companies and land. He’s very rich like Jeff Bezos.
✩ He loves to collect cars and before cars became a thing he owned a bunch of horses and owned a ranch.
✩He loves to do things for you even if it’s the most simplest things around the house. He will do anything for you.
✩This man had the body of a god. He has what people call a sleeper build. He’s very tall and brooding. He doesn’t really workout like his sister.
✩The first few year of being a vampire you continue to grow regularly then after that you’re body will stay the same. So his body is the same as it was in early years.
✩He has a black Victorian style house. The interior is a very cozy dark look with a bunch of dim lights. It smells like a very clean cologne.
*This is my first oc if you guys have any recommendations or smut request lmk. Ask me questions about Alreck and help me bring his character more to life. I’ll be doing Amarande next.*
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tenebraevesper · 2 years
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Sonic the Hedgehog Analyzer, Issue #34: Chao Races and Badnik Bases (Part 2)
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So, in the last Issue, we left off with a cliffhanger of Shadow being knocked off a building by Starline empowered by the Power Core (which is kind of... weird, because you’d think Shadow would be able to counter that). So, let’s see what happened next!
Instead of meeting up with Starline and Shadow, we actually see Amy, Cream, Cheese and Gemerl having breakfast at the White Park Chateau. Cream voices her worries regarding Rouge’s absence, but Amy figures Rouge is off stealing stuff.
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They suddenly get ambushed by Rouge who tells them that the guests don’t really have anything noteworthy of stealing. Glad to know she has her priorities right. Amy basically notes how Rouge is a bad influence on Cream, which Rouge totally agrees with, then adds how if Cream wants to loot a hotel, she should make sure the guests are loaded.
Stay classy, Rouge.
They overheard Omochao announcing the race, with the five running off to the track while being observed by Shadow. Told ya he’ll be fine (although I have no clue where he spent the whole night).
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The only thing that seems to be bruised is Shadow’s ego, who’s on the search for whoever knocked him off the roof. He figures that this guy might be the root of the Egg-Tech rumors, having snatched Clutch’s card from him. Now, we know that the person in question is Starline and I assume that, after Starline’s run-in with Rouge, the card Clutch gave to Rouge somehow ended stuck on Starline’s coat.
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As Shadow proceeds up to Clutch’s penthouse room, we observe Cheese participating in the race.
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Shadow figures Clutch might know about Eggman’s whereabouts and searches for him, only to come across a cage with something inside, calling Clutch utter scum. He suddenly hears Omega, telling him about Rouge’s plan.
Meanwhile, at the Chao Races, we see that Cheese is about to qualify for the semi-finals. Cream, Amy, Rouge and Gemerl are confident that he’ll win, but Cheese still seems to be worried about the Dark Chao, who is just glaring back. The Dark Chao basically tries to hit him, but Cheese dodges the attack, flying off and winning the race.
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Cream and Amy are happy to see that Cheese had won, but Rouge notices Clutch staring at them, and I have to say, that shot of Clutch is rather creepy, especially with the Dark Chao cowering in front of him. Rouge then suggests that she takes Cheese to the first-aid tent, but Gemerl stops her, Amy adding how they’re not letting Cheese out of their sight.
Rouge explains her plan about tricking Clutch into thinking they’re doing a trade and she figured that this gambit is a bit too much for them, but surprisingly, Amy accepts, noting that Rouge will need back-up.
They all approach Clutch in his penthouse later on, with Clutch calling them a band of sniveling girl scouts carrying a rust-bucket, which agitates Gemerl. Rouge calms him down, with Clutch continuing how he has defenses set. Rouge tells him there’s no need and brings Cream and Cheese over for the trade, assuring her that she has everything under control.
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Clutch comments how he likes Rouge’s approach of tearing Cream and Cheese’s bond, with Rouge telling him how “I always get what’s mine”.
Awkward pause. Rouge repeats her words. Nothing happens. 
Clutch starts mocking her about her codeword, only to get kicked in the face by Shadow.
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Now that’s what I like to see!
Omega then adds how Shadow’s plan works better than Rouge’s and considering how he had knocked Clutch out cold, I agree.
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Amy shares the same sentiment as I do, while Rouge thanks Shadow for his help. Shadow replies how he didn’t do it for them and that they should check what’s under the cloth in the back, while he goes to find a real challenge.
I guess Shadow trusts all of them to take care of the situation while he chases after Starline. Also, this is the first time Team Dark is together since the Zombot fiasco.
As for what’s under the cloth, there are a bunch of Chao, all locked up because they lost in the race. No wonder Shadow was so angry earlier.
Cream tells them they need to get the Chao out, while Rouge goes to call Tails so he can help them pick up the right parts for Omega. Amy tells her her plan was good, even if it didn’t go as expected and Rouge has that strange look in her eyes, agreeing with Amy.
Back at the abandoned Egg Base, Sonic has some fun fighting the dolls he found there.
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I think it’s even funnier that his chosen opponent is a doll of Knuckles. He turns to Tails, wondering how much longer this is going to take, while Tails notes how it is really tricky and it takes a lot of effort to stay undetected. Sonic tries to have some fun by cracking a pun, but it doesn’t land.
Now, I have a question here? We know that a whole day had passed, so if this is happening at the same time as Amy, Cream and Rouge’s adventure, wouldn’t that mean that Sonic and Tails spent a whole day in the Egg Base? Or maybe this takes place a little before the fiasco with Clutch? I guess we’ll see.
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Anyways, Sonic is bored, so he just kicks a screw which ricochets all over the room and hits a new, but important character in this story - Belle the Tinkerer.
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Sonic, surprisingly, thinks she’s a Badnik and goes straight to fight her.
Okay, hold up here for a second. For starters, while it is understandable that Sonic would expect to get attacked by Badniks at an Egg Base, I feel that he’s a bit too trigger happy here, especially since Belle didn’t do anything yet (and if it was a sneak-attack, wouldn’t she have done it earlier?). Also, I had seen conversations about how it is hypocritical that Sonic spared Metal Sonic, but attacks Belle. I do feel that there is a slight difference between those situations - not only does Sonic know Metal and what he’s capable of, and Metal was also stripped of his weapons; while Belle is completely new, so Sonic has no idea what she can do.
Still, does it excuse this scene from being really jarring? No, it doesn’t.
It also doesn’t help that Sonic keeps attacking Belle while she’s trying to avoid his attacks and tell him she doesn’t want to fight. Not to mention, Tails yelling at Sonic that Belle isn’t a Badnik.
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Sonic doesn’t listen, stepping instead on Belle’s tail, which causes her to automatically kick him. I call that karma.
Belle immediately apologizes (don’t! - this one is on Sonic). Tails comes in-between the two, with Sonic stopping.
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He explains that he got a bit squirrely due to being cooped up inside and while I believe it, I’m not buying it. You’re better than that Sonic.
Tails apologizes to Belle and explains how they usually run into Eggman robots. Belle introduces herself, with Tails fawning over her build and wonder who her creator is. Belle replies that it’s private information and how she’s looking for him. Sonic basically describes Eggman, with Belle replying how it isn’t Eggman. Tails notes how they don’t have to fight every robot, only for the alarm to start.
Tails facepalms, having forgotten about the firewall. Sonic tells him they’ll figure it out later, but Tails remains determined to find a way to get through it. Suddenly, they get surrounded by Badniks.
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Sonic and Tails discuss the Badniks and what they should do, with Sonic not having enough room to build up a solid spin-dash (and Amy is unfortunately away, else she probably could’ve just hit him with her hammer). They don’t notice the Badnik behind them, with Belle saving Tails from it and Tails returning the favor.
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Tails helps Belle up, with Sonic telling her that he hopes she can put her skills to good use, because they’ll need all the help they can get as the Badniks have them completely surrounded.
Links:
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#Sonic the Hedgehog Analyzer (Masterlist)
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I FORGOT TO ADD A TITLE OOPS BUT HUH basically THIS IS JUST ME BEING INSANE ABOUT DICK GRAYSON WITH ADHD AND I REALLY CHANNELED SOME SHIT WITH THIS ONE BESTIES
as the 3 people who read my insane Dick Grayson centered ramblings know Dick Grayson with adhd is a head canon I really like, especially as a person who has it and researched it further. now im wondering what kinda things would he hyperfixate on? what genre of topic wouldn't leave his mind? like fun hyperfixations not like the im doing a thing and I got sucked into it for 6 hours straight and its a work thing type of hyperfixation. LARGE BLOCK OF TEXT HERE: would he have a fixation on birds? just know a bunch of bird facts? or would it be more acrobat based? hell would he get one on the circus? or would it be more focused on the media? does he find an underground singer he becomes unwell about? buying posters and merchandise for a comic he really likes? or would they be more scientifically inclined? would he know a bunch of random “useless” human body facts? would he have exactly one book series he rereads over and over? would he be a huge math nerd and spend hours doing it? would he accidentally spiral into doing makeup and fashion? would he fixate on hair tutorials? would fixate on learning a random skill or trade like sewing? hell he could hop through any of these. his room would be full of things from previous and current fixations, the shelves covered in knickknacks, maybe he learned how to do ceramics and has his first ever shitty bowl on a table. maybe hes done none of that, maybe he just day dreams about it, maybe hes only got time for one or two hobbies and he can never get himself to do it, maybe hes always running late to events and shit maybe hes always early. maybe he wants to go and do things outside of his regular work/life routine but ends up stuck on the couch for hours, internally trying to move. maybe he gets indecisive and can do anything at all stuck at making the choice, maybe he second guesses himself. maybe he has ideas and things he could do, but he cant ever just do them and he feels horrible. maybe he feels like hes lazy after all other people dont have this problem, other people just seem to do things. maybe he doesn't share any of his likes and hobbies because hes terrified of the idea that someone would make fun of him, maybe someone has and now he doesn't share anything with them, maybe the idea of someone making fun of or just not getting it makes his chest hurt like hes being stabbed, maybe he longs to just be able to share with people, maybe he has to restrain himself from correcting people on a fact, maybe he doesn't always succeed, maybe he cringes and laughs it off as him getting too excited, maybe privately hes berating himself. maybe when he does have someone to just info dump at he lights up, and he goes and goes and goes, maybe he gets animated sweeping hand movements, making faces and noises to highlight a point, maybe after a while he’ll apologize for talking for so long, maybe he’ll get such a rush of just pure happy emotions afterwards that it feels like too much to contain in his body, maybe hes embarrassed of stimming in front of other people, maybe he only does it at home by himself, maybe he doesn't even know what hes doing hes just been told off in the past, maybe when hes happy or gets a burst of random energy he feels like crooning, or making different animal like noises, maybe hes done it before in front of other people by accident, maybe hes gotten yelled at for talking too much, maybe he has too wait until he knows people better before he can start being weird, maybe he masks around people, maybe he uses humor as a shield, maybe hes never been diagnosed, maybe he just thought everyone was like this, maybe he struggled with a school topic more than his peers, maybe he was too smart and if he just applied himself he would get it, he didn't need help, maybe he spent hours pouring over a homework, frustration building into a full on breakdown, why cant he just get it like other kids do? maybe his emotions just get to be too much, he feels like an overfilled cup, maybe he lashes out, and when that doesn't work when things get worse he internalizes, maybe he has to check and double check things are there, maybe he loses small things like his keys, maybe he’s lost his wallet multiple times, maybe he spends days without his phone because it was under a book, maybe sometimes he just cant and everything is too much, maybe he feels like if hes not doing anything than hes failing everyone, maybe some days it feels like everyone hates him, maybe on those days he feels like snapping breaking apart and just screaming, maybe some days some minor inconvenience makes him snap ripping into whoever is near him, maybe he spends hours stewing in self hatred and guilt until he works up the nerve to apologize, maybe he works on cases/his day job to avoid things, maybe he’s shit at deadlines and does everything towards the end, maybe he finds ways to just sneak in his current fixation into the conversation, maybe he feels bone dead tired but his mind is too busy to sleep, maybe he suffers from horrible nightmares and just sits in the tub with the lights on.   BLOCK OF TEXT ENDS HERE anyway uh I think hes silly goofy. like ive found my favorite brand of adhd I like to give Dick Grayson because there are 3 main types of adhd that people fall under do note that everyones symptoms present differently and lots of people experience a wide variety of symptoms in a variety of ways, there is the inattentive type which has a tendency to fly under the diagnostic radar, hyperactive which is what people usually think of when it comes to adhd, and the combined type which is like a remix of both. I personally tend to give dick hyperactive, mostly due to most likely having this type myself lol. that and I feel like he would have undiagnosed adult adhd. I say this because I know bruce is rich but when he first got dick he was like 20 or smth and he probably has no fucking clue at what's considered normal child vs thats a mental disorder. Partly because he’s not exactly a “normal” guy himself and the fact that despite it all they personally just think dick is like that and that he needs to apply himself more or smth. adhd is somewhat new in the sense its not just hyperactive white boys getting diagnosed so information around it is heavily skewed one way die to a lack of long term data collected from a variety of groups(like autism). like bruce and Alfred dont know what they dont know, and they have no fucking clue dick has adhd. and dont worlds greatest detective me hes still just a guy, and people make mistakes or refuse to believe things. like I feel like im explaining this wrong. so basically bruce has a warped sense of what is considered normal in children due to his backstory tm and the way he grew up, and dick is a young child riddled with adhd and ptsd from his parents dying in front of him. and dick has just always been the way he has been so he only knows something is “wrong” with him when he struggles to fit into school. bruce being a sudden first time parent thing to this kid, only really has Alfred as back up and no offense Alfred you are old. so shit like adhd isn't even really considered/known about. AND SO basically what im getting at here is dick had a hard time he has no idea why he does shit and if other people do it, so he just spends a lot of time compensating for things and feeling like “damn why cant I do that? it seems super easy for other people? am I just broken in some way?” and like bruce and Alfred tried again they didn't know what they didn't know. dick would probably eventually have something/someone that makes him realize “oh shit I have have adhd? what?” and then boom he has an explanation for why he is the way he is. its messy and I cant quite get it out with the right words but yeah thats why I tend to give dick undiagnosed adult adhd. my adhd was diagnosed as a kid, but like it wasn't really treated in any meaningful way it was more like “cool fact about me tee hee” so I try to pull from that a bit.
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motownfiction · 2 years
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theories of happiness
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At fifteen years old, Judy Armstrong announces to her mother that she has three theories of happiness. She’s written them down, and she wants to share them.
They’re at the breakfast table, and Mom almost chokes on her coffee. Mama Katie has to clap her on the back like she’s a little kid. Jenny smirks over her scrambled eggs.
“Glad to see you have my back,” Judy says, sticking her fork into her waffle.
“Honey, it’s not that,” Mom says, still trying to sip at her coffee. “It’s that … it’s that you’re fifteen. You just got done with driver’s training.”
“And you sucked,” Jenny says.
It takes all of Judy’s self-control not to catapult a forkful of eggs at her little sister’s face.
“Jenny, stop it,” Mom says.
She turns back to Judy with worried eyes. Judy wants to scream. There’s probably nothing in the world she hates more than Mom’s worried eyes. As Judy and Jenny have gotten older, the worried eyes have gotten more frequent. And to think, Judy once assumed that getting older meant that the worried eyes would slowly begin to fade away.
“You’re fifteen,” Mom says again. “You’re not old enough to have life theories. I’m fifty-five, and I’m not old enough to have life theories.”
“Strangely enough, at fifty-three, I feel prepared,” Mama Katie says. It would make Judy laugh if she were in a better mood.
“I’m just saying,” Mom adds. “Don’t you need a little experience?”
“Sure,” Judy says. “But I’m not saying they’re theories about life. I’m saying they’re theories of happiness. And I don’t think I’m too young to get what happiness is. Do you?”
Mom sighs and shakes her head.
“I guess not,” she says. “Bring on the theories, then.”
Judy sighs and produces a single piece of paper from her English notebook. With a shaky hand, she gives it to Mom, who reads it with a sharp eye. Judy can still remember everything it says.
Number 1: Put on music that could never ever be sad. Best choice is probably “I Can’t Get Next to You,” but “I Can’t Help Myself (Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch)” is a good alternative. My reason is I just like The Temptations more.
Number 2: Eat a doughnut. They’re good.
Number 3: Be as much like my dad as possible.
When Mom reads the last point, she almost chokes on her coffee again. Mama Katie asks her what’s the matter, but Mom doesn’t answer. She’s too busy looking right at Judy.
At first, Judy can’t figure out if Mom is mad at her. She doesn’t usually like to talk about Sam, the girls’ dad, the one who died a long, long time before anyone knew they could ever be born. Maybe she thinks it’ll make Mama Katie jealous. Maybe she just misses him too much to make him real (because if he’s real, then he’s really gone, and his daughters really will never have the chance to meet him). Either way, they don’t talk about Sam very often. At least, they don’t always talk about him directly.
Sam’s influence is all over the place, even in spots where Judy didn’t think it was possible. Mom even runs his old store. But people are always telling Judy that she reminds them of Sam. His smarts, his musical prowess, his ability to babble in a few minutes with more wit than others will ever be able to muster in their entire lives. They say Judy got all that; that it must have been genetic because she never knew him; because she can’t have ever known him. And it kills her. It kills her to think there was once this perfect ally in the world, her own father, and he’s been dead too long for her to ask him any questions. He’s been dead too long to be her daddy. He’s been dead too long to be her friend.
It’s not fair. Jenny is so much like Mom, and they get to spend all the time in the world together. But what do you do when your so-alike parent has been in the ground for almost twenty whole years, five years longer than you’ve been alive? What do you do when everyone tells you that you smile like a dead man? That you spin your vinyl records like a corpse? That your laugh sounds like a laugh you’ve never really heard … a laugh you should have been able to hear all the time?
Mom takes another breath and hands the piece of paper back to Judy. At first, Judy’s pretty sure she won’t say anything.
Then again, Mom has a way of surprising people.
“You don’t even have to try,” she says, and this time, it doesn’t sound resentful. “You’re like him … more than you know.”
Judy gives her mother a weak smile. It’s not much, she thinks, but it’s something.
Maybe one of these days, she’ll know all the ins and outs. Maybe one of these days, she’ll finally understand what Aunt Sadie and Uncle Daniel mean when they say she’s just like her dad. Maybe one of these days, she’ll stop being so angry that she never knew him.
Maybe one of these days, Judy will believe her own theories.
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fluffybluekitten · 2 years
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1, 9, 13 and 15 for skin to skin combat?
1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?
Ages ago I read a bunch of fics where Batman keeps the Scarecrow in his batcave after Batman Begins, so that’s basically where the idea started. I thought the Riddler/Batman dynamic would be so interesting in that situation, there would just be so much tension, so much potential for mind games. I wanted all that porn, and all that conflict, and a plot kind of grew out of it.
Also - dark Batman! I really like the idea of an evil/corrupted Batman because I think he’s an easy character to make scary just by dialling up a few of his traits like his certainty that he’s right, tendency to make decisions for others… I wanted to write a Batman where he's doing awful things but he's still recognisably Batman.
And I loved Zero year and wanted to write zero-year Riddler, he’s so awful but so compelling. And Zero year Bruce was one of the few Bruce Wayne’s I actually liked too. He’s so obviously messed up and imperfect and determined. And zero year Riddler is as into Bruce as batman, which I think along with their shared history adds so much to the story.
I wanted them to fall in love. That’s not easy for those characters. Is Edward even capable of love? What would make Bruce allow himself to fall in love with Edward?
And I kept thinking what would Edward do after Zero year? He’s failed, but how is he going to top that? I just think that one day he’s going to be setting up riddles outside some bank or something and take a look at himself and think, wtf am I doing? He doesn’t appear much for a while after zero year but I liked that in his few appearances there’s a theme of him practicing meditation and stuff – so I chose to see that as him recognising that there’s something about himself that can be improved and having that potential for change.
So I kind of leaned into that, gave him all that self-doubt. Edward’s not a nice person and probably won’t ever be but I wanted to write a story where he has the potential to be slightly less of a douche and have some happiness in the future.
 9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?
After writing about a thousand words of the first draft I realised that writing Zero year Riddler is really hard, so I scrapped that draft and wrote a whole plan with a more generic Riddler. Then I realised nothing about it worked and brought back Zero year Eddie.
Also I didn’t know what had happened to Bruce until halfway through the first draft so I have a list of 77 possible things which could have happened in notes.
There’s also a cut chapter. It’s really bad.
 13: What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?
I wrote most of this really quickly in lockdown, when I suddenly had time to listen to a lot of new music. So any new song I listened to for the first time then is a riddlebat song and will immediately take me back. None of them have anything to do with the story though. Gold by Marina and the Diamonds is actually the skin to skin combat theme song.
 15: What did you learn from writing this fic?
It’s the longest thing I’ve ever written and the most fun. It’s also the first fic I’ve published where I’ve had people reading along each chapter and getting to interact with people and talk about my dumb story and know people are enjoying it is the best feeling ever. I want to do it all again. 
If there’s one thing that I’ll do differently in the future it’s not write a story where the mystery is unsolvable. There are hints to where things went down, but I don’t think there’s any way a reader can figure out what actually happened. Wish I had planned that better.
And riddle writing, I guess. But that’s a useless skill.
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emma-what-son · 2 years
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I must say that im not sure if I’m still as excited to read Tom’s book anymore. I was one of the many people that got a pre-order on Amazon as soon as he announced that he was writing a book. The way the sold it was that he would be sharing stories never told, and his experience growing up on a movie set. Well as a huge HP fan i definitely wanted to read that, how are you ever going to get more gossip, or behind the scenes stories than from an actor that’s as in the movies. But from what I am seeing and reading online, the book talks about him and Emma a lot. Like I know that’s always been a topic people love to discuss since Emma said she had a crush on him when they were children. But man this dude needs to let it go, even if it’s for PR and getting more sells. They might be actually be good friends, “soulmates” or been FWB at some point, but this man is milking it till there is no more left. Out of the many young actors that came out of the HP movies only a few have been able to continue their acting caters beyond HP. Emma, Dan, Rupert, Robert, are probably some of the only actors that had a career after HP at least a productive one. I think both Dan and Robert are the most successful actors that came out of the HP cast. Yeah Dan will always be seen as Harry but he’s been getting great roles in shows or movies lately, and you can tell he’s having fun and he picks what he wants to do. Robert is killing the game, he became the latest Batman, and has a bunch of great roles in his career as well. Both Rupert and Emma have continued their careers even if it’s in smaller roles, or TV shows. I think Tom definitely needs HP to be able to get anything, before the book release when was the last time people talked about him? So I see why he keeps going back to it and Emma. But man I think he probably realized he fumbled the bag, specially if he never dated or even had sex with Emma. After years and years of people asking you if you had anything with her, he probably realized he messed up. And maybe even now if he does want anything with her I’m sure she’s the one that’s moved on from him. Plus I’m not sure how his girlfriend is ok with him talking about her so much, like each time people ask him questions it’s always about Emma. Now after she called him her soulmate it’s going to be worse. She must really love the guy to put up with this crap show. As for Emma she’s definitely trying to make a comeback, but surprisingly she didn’t even promote the book on any of her socials. Which is kinda odd if he’s supposedly one of your best friends. You would think you would try and help to promote it. She’s been a bit more active on social media or Instagram. Posting about Prada, but in sure that’s probably due to contract stuff stating she has to promote the product. And even after that promotion it’s definitely not doing good number for sure. So I’m not sure if Prada will be happy with how little attention she’s getting for the adds and perfume itself. She got more attention for being mentioned in Toms book and wiring the intro. Shes also doing that pickleball tournament next month. I’m sure that’s good PR for her and will hopefully help her image. I think people are losing Interest in her and her career and she’s probably having trouble getting used to it. Unless she comes out with a huge project next year, either a huge movie role, or production project. She’s either going to continue to go downhill or some crazy rumors will end up damaging her career even more.
---
Emma is brought up a lot, because he's essentially using her and their friendship to promote the book. I'm sure there's a lot more HP stuff in the book that doesn't involve Emma. It's true that she didn't promote the book in any way. Maybe she thought she'd done enough by writing the foreword lol.
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taocrafttarot · 9 months
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Happy Festivus to all who celebrate! Welcome to what I'm calling Blurry Time '23. Elfcon is over, the preparations are done. It's all cookies and coffee from here.
I'm a fan of Outlined, the web comic by Chaz Hutton. My favorite comic is the drawing of a December calendar page where the second half is basically a bunch of wiggly lines.
That perfectly captures the feel of the season. Even for those of us working a normal day job schedule, there is a sense of shared down time and camaraderie among those out and about actually doing the things  for that week between Christmas eve and New Years day.
It's truly liminal space and time. It is magical time. It is time disconnected from time - or something like that.
2023 as a whole felt very liminal and transitional. It was a blurry-ish year moving from the extended pandemic dumpster fire years 2020-22 (2016-22 if you live in the U.S.) We'll get back to how 2024 is looking when we do the annual just-for-fun (and wishful thinking) year-ahead Tarot reading next weekend (-ish)
In the meantime, I want to use blurry time to bridge years.
2023 was the first full year of Sage Words Tarot. I want to circle back around and use the blurry time re-introduce it all for the bright, shiny new year on the way.
I don't know why - probably no reason at all - but it always seems to start with musing about names.
Hi! I'm Sage.
I'm also a Tarot reader and author of Sage Sips blog.
I've been reading Tarot and oracle cards since around 1992 which adds up to 30 years of experience with Tarot and intuition development (!)
I didn't originally start out to be a Tarot reader (who does?) At first, I did readings for myself and friends (why PAY for it when you can DIY it?) After close friend suggested I go online with my readings (eternal gratitude!) I offered psychic Tarot readings through Keen, Advice Trader and AllExperts under my old internet handle, Baihu. After doing hundreds of online readings (I stopped counting after 400) I opened my own Tarot practice in 2003 which grew to include ModernOracleTarot.com, the Tarotbytes blog and the now-defunct Quirk & Flotsam shop on Etsy.
It was all good, but had become a hodge-podge of names and logos over the years. Then along came the Covid pandemic and changed things even more. After a short interim as TaoCraft Tarot (2018-2023) I've been working as SageWordsTarot.com and writing Sage Sips blog ever since.
TaoCraft lingers in layout names. TaoCraft was drawn from my love of Taoist philosophy. My Tarot work will always be guided by the principles of simplicity, authenticity, and kindness. It was also drawn from my affinity for solitary eclectic witchcraft. The TaoCraft name means a lot to me, but not so much to anyone else who sees it and that's a problem because these Tarot readings aren't about me - they are for YOU and about YOU.
Sage is a pen name, which helps to protect our privacy. Christian nationalism and religious bigotry is a very real thing here in America.  I will do all I can to make this a safe space for everyone, especially for the lgbtquia+ community and those of us who are not Christian.
The herb sage has a comforting, familiar scent and flavor that most of us know from home cooking and holiday turkeys.
In aromatherapy, sage incense and essential oil can clear negative energy, calm anxiety and promote a feeling of general well being.
The word sage also means something or someone who is wise. The word sage describes the wise advice Tarot gives.
Safety, comfort, calmness, wisdom and a feeling that things are going to be alright are all qualities I hope you’ll experience when you read the blog, visit my social media or best of all get a private reading of your own .
Click HERE if you would like to order a private Tarot reading by email, no appointment needed.
Click HERE to schedule a flat rate ($40) in-person, phone or online reading (valid email required to participate)
Click HERE to subscribe to Sage Sips membership on Ko-fi to get discounted email readings, free one card readings, and exclusive content on the ko-fi blog.
Enter your email in the right hand column (or scroll down on mobile) to get new posts in your inbox as they happen. If you prefer a once weekly digest please subscribe to Sage Sips on Substack
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fizzingwizard · 2 years
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Solo-ing this book ask game this time~ wish I had more variety to offer but anyway it was fun. Skipped a bunch that I don't have time for/have poor answers to.
describe a book you’ve read in the last twelve months in freeform poetry
Silverchest by Carl Phillips. Very haunting and emotive poetry.
what was the first book you read from your favourite author (and what made you come back for more)?
Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro. I didn't know anything about it the first time I read it, so the twist took me completely by surprise. I'm always so sad for new readers who probably already know about it thanks to the movies. It's not that the twist is so unique, but the build-up leading into it lets it really land the punch, and adds an extra layer of tragedy to the finale.
But it wasn't the twist that made me an Ishiguro fan. It's the depth of emotion and his view of humanity through such an honest lens. Of course I love Remains of the Day as well, and When We Were Orphans. I expected a similar twist with Klara in the Sun, but although there kind of is one, it's so much less dramatic - but there's something about that which works for the narrative just as well. I own The Buried Giant but it's still only part-read back at my mom's house.
share a cover that made you pick up a specific book (and how that turned out for you)
I no longer remember which cover it was! But it was The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. I read it when I was 16 at a Halloween party when I felt partied out. It was on a book shelf at my friend's house. I think I was intrigued by both the title and the cover. Liked it a lot.
which non-fiction book had you glued to your seat and fascinated with each new chapter?
That's a toss up between Wild Swans by Jung Chang and The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls. (I assume memoirs count.) The latter is such an intriguing depiction of a family dynamic and love and toxicity. The former is a thick book of mostly exposition that follows the writers' ancestors during the transition from Imperial China to communism. We were assigned only a small chunk of it in a high school class, but it was so fascinating that I read the whole thing.
name a book series you didn’t finish (and why)
I've picked up a lot of books that start a series and didn't make it past the first chapter, so I can't really count them. There is one book which comes to mind, but I can't recall the name of it anymore. It was a fantasy series that I read when I was 18 or so. It might be YA but either way I think I was too old for it, because I remember that after finishing the whole book I thought it was so insipid and cliche. Dunno if I'd still feel that way about it now, but I can't remember what its even called, so. Definitely didn't continue on to the sequels.
do you remember the first book you read by yourself?
no lol way too young. it was probably a babysitter's club or something.
which book can you turn to whenever things get worse?
Well I know this is probably a cop-out coming from me, but I really do feel calmer when I reread a Moomin book. They're so full of peace without sacrificing an ounce of sensitivity, and because they're children's books that even adults can love, I can read them quickly when I need to feel settled down. I really want to recommend them to friends and family, but I know it's also such a personal reaction that I just can't expect them to feel the same. I don't think my dad, especially, would be able to look past the funny characters with the silly names.
share the last book that made you experience an outburst of emotion — be that happiness, fear, shock, sadness, anger...
I'm going to go with The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy. It's certainly not the "last" book I read, because other than Silverchest, Moomins, Klara in the Sun, Middlemarch, and a couple Jane Austen novels, I haven't been reading much recently. And I can't keep picking those ones over and over. XP But The God of Small Things is my long-time favorite for the way it shocks you, and rips you apart, yet remains so tender. recommend three (non-english) books you read in translation Kitchen by Banana Yoshimoto Kafka on the Shore by Haruki Murakami One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez if a stranger on the train wanted to make you fall in love with them instantly — which book would they have to read? Never Let Me Go, maybe, but I think I'd want them to like the poetry of Mary Oliver or Walt Whitman better, if we're talking bout love. share a quote that made you read a certain book (and how that turned out) as it happens, this quote from Silverchest: "At last, he's asleep. I can look at him the way I'm meant to." And it turned out very good. I'm glad I read these poems. Sometimes the sexuality made me uncomfortable, because I just don't read that sort of thing often. But what I love is that the poetry surrounded that very blunt sexuality is as beautiful and evocative as you could ask it to be, which elevates the eroticism and puts puritanical discomfort to shame. did you ever read a book because a show/film was coming out based on it? Bonus: did you watch the show/film and how did it hold up? Technically that's why I read Lord of the Rings, the first movie had just come out and I had been putting off my two friends who were trying to convince me to read the books. We were thirteen, and my best friend gave me a copy of FotR with the movie poster as the cover, and wrote a note inside that said "May this book open your eyes to the wonderful world of Tolkien!" Well, it did. Initially I had trouble getting through Tom Bombadil, but once I did I barreled through all three books before the Two Towers film came out. Much more recently, Good Omens, which I had never read before hearing of the TV show. I love both the LotR movies and the Good Omens TV show, which is interesting since adaptations can be very hit or miss for me. But it's a combo of the care that went into making them as well as just having excellent material in the originals. share a book that helped you evolve into the person you are now Definitely His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman. I read those books in junior high and they were life-changing. I always loved scrappy girls like Pippi Longstocking and Anne of Green Gables. Matilda made me uncomfortable because she was so angry and vengeful but at the same time I loved her for it! But Lyra was the one who stayed with me the most, probably because the message of "lying is good"! Not really, but I mean, there is this whole undercurrent of rebelling against authority and trusting one's feelings which becomes loud and powerful in the final book. Lyra was so subversive for me and still one of my favorite characters ever. what kind of atmosphere/topic/theme are you currently most interested in? Lately what I want to read the most is books that are both realistic and loving. I don't want the love to be sacrificed for gritty realism, but I don't want realism sacrificed for cloying fluff. I'm looking for the kind of balance I want to see emulated more often in people's interactions with each other IRL. Instead of assuming "my neighbor is a monster," finding the human there. I think this is present a lot in Jane Austen novels.
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merrrrrrrrry · 2 years
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hello<3
first off im sorry you had a not very good day 😔 giving you lots of hugs 💗💗 im glad my message helped even if it was only a little 🫶🏻🫶🏻
i’ve never been interested in sports honestly i didn’t play any sports when i was in school and i think at most i’ve watched like 5 (american) football games but only bc my dad was watching them djshshs also that’s so cute omg i love that you have that thing to share with your brother 🥹
im currently rewatching heartstopper for the like..30th time fjshsjs i watched it for the first time earlier this year bc my friend recommended it and i saw it a lot on my dash and i’ve been obsessed ever since!! any time i don’t know what to watch or i just want a comfort show to watch i always gravitate towards that one 🥹
i love reading too!! i just haven’t actually picked up a book in months though bc i’ll read like 4/5 in a week or two and then need a break fjshshs what kind of shows/movies/books do you like??
i would never make fun of anything like that!! crafts are always good even if they’re not technically perfect 🫶🏻🫶🏻
sending you extra hugs to close my message as well 💗✨
-✨holiday pal✨
Your messages always brighten up my day so thank you 🫶🏼💕✨
If you talk about playing sports , i haven't really ever played any. Maybe like played cricket and football like once in every 2-3 years in school because a bunch of people and the pe teacher wanted it, though it was always fun to shout unnecessarily and okay horribly🤣 also this is my second time writing this so i must add that I did learn table tennis for a while in my school when he had to choose a sport for our sports period. And it was tradition to play a little badminton during break time on winter days in school
I'm so sorry for the late reply, I'm on a train currently. Our train left the station at 5:45 so we got up at 4:00 am today and slept a little earlier the previous day
I read the heartstopper comics and watched it this year and it's so much fun. All the characters are so lovely and endearing so I'm completely get you!
I used to read so often and so avidly but i haven't read something other than my course books in the last few years. But i started reading One Hundred Years Of Solitude today on the train and I'm happy. I feel like I'm reading so much slower than I did but I'm so elated to be reading something after such a long while
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Sending lots of hugs and love
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wroteclassicaly · 2 years
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Warnings: Language, NSFW, piss kink, watersports, dom!Eddie, sub!Reader, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, and MORE!
Summary: You and Eddie try out a kink that you just can’t deny.
Pairings: Eddie Munson x Female Reader
A/N: Listen, I already know I’m going to hell, so why not add to it? This is something I’ve been hesitant about, because I know a lot of people don’t like it and will be very judgmental. But I ask that if you don’t like it—KEEP SCROLLING! Eddie with this kink is one of my favorite tropes and I’ve been wanting to write a fic like this for some time. Gotta thank @corrodedhawkins for encouraging me to share this (join me in hell, yeah?), and for listening to my ramblings on the subject.
PLEASE, PLEASE don’t send me nasty anons! I get it if this isn’t your thing, but no one needs to be kink shamed, yeah? Anyways, for those who will read, I hope you enjoy! <3
Side note: I didn’t tag anyone that I didn’t know if they would be reading this or not. I’m sorry, I just don’t want to tag anyone that doesn’t like this kinda content. :(
~*~
You’re splayed out on Eddie’s bed on Saturday night, his next day show looming like the promised hangovers of those who will be his drunken crowd at The Hideout, focusing heavily on making sure those nails have a perfect shining secondary coat. Once finished, you blow on the midnight colored polish, smiling up at your boyfriend as he chews a Marlboro filter between milky white teeth.
“All done, baby?” His questions, a smirk on his features that you love so much.
You nod rather proudly, leaning down to peck his wrist bone with a chaste kiss, sliding back into a cross legged position, confirming. “Good to go, love.”
He admires your handiwork, flexing his fingers, twisting his hands back and forth. “Looks bitchin’.”
You reach back to pick up his vest that you’d been working at prior, helping put your home economics sowing skills to good use, threading on some new patches Eddie had bought for the denim. He winces a little, gripping his crotch and causing your eyes to dart in concern. “You good, Eds?”
“Yeah, just gotta hit the can real quick, babe. You’re doin’ great, by the way. Couldn’t do all this shit without you.” He’s comically hopping around to show his eagerness to find that small bathroom in the trailer’s hallway, making you snort, then he quickly leans in to peck your forehead. Your eyes close in sheer happiness, those butterflies clawing at your insides.
He leaves and you continue your task. That is, until he’s calling for you moments later. “Uh, babe?”
Lifting your head towards the direction he’s calling from, you place the vest off to the side. “Yeah, Eds? Everything okay?”
“Would you… can you give me a hand, please?”
You’re a little concerned, hoping he didn’t trip over his own two feet (as he is prone to do), but he sounds exasperated and winded, so you’re following his voice and heading into the cove of the tiny bathroom, bare feet cool against the peeling linoleum that decorates its floor. “Eddie?”
He’s got his belt halfway undone, shirt bunched above his navel, making your brow raise. “What’s wrong?”
“This’ll teach my dumb ass not to drink so much beer before you come over. I didn’t think.” He wiggles his ringed hands, as if to show you something, his nails still wet and sticky. And it clicks in an instant as to what he’s implying, or rather, requesting.
“Wait, you want me to—“
“Help me piss? Yeah, I know. I’m a grade A asshole for asking.” His cute chocolate eyes do that wide eyed thing and you can’t resist him or his banter.
“Shut up.” You roll your eyes and step forward, jerking the belt apart and helping him with the button and fly, that zipper a resounding echo in the confined space.
Eddie has to force himself to be a gentleman when your hand slides into his boxers and tugs his soft cock out, cutely looking at him for instruction.
“You just, kinda… aim it?” Eddie directs, making you both laugh at how incredulous it is, and that relaxes you.
His palm lays flat over top your hand that is curled around him, an immediate groan toppling off his lips once you’ve got him where he needs to be as he lets go, his other hand propped on the opposite wall. It’s an everyday thing, but it’s loud. And you’re staring. Confused and ashamed, you force yourself to look away when Eddie brushes your knuckles with his fingertips—a simple intimate action he’s done countless times before. Once he’s finished, you make quick work of helping him tuck himself back in and try to work through no eye contact as you thread his belt together, leaving him alone.
What you didn’t know, is that Eddie saw your wondrous stares and your brief thigh clenching, the words, “Fuck, you’re into this?” Dying on his lips.
~*~
Around midnight, you and Eddie had laid down in a serene calmness that one of Summer’s last remaining storms can bring. And he can’t stop thinking about that glazed look in your dilating pupils, the way you tried to completely ignore helping him in the way that you did. And he’s upset that you are embarrassed, especially with how much his cock has been twitching in his boxers at the entirety of this newfound kink. You’ve been in a committed relationship for years, so why this? You’re still awake—albeit—silent, your neck tucked into the curvature of his jugular, fingers playing with his pick chain.
He pokes your nose with a manicured nail, causing you to peer up, still wide awake. You’ve been frustrated all night, something else that he’s noticing, unbeknownst to you. Eddie isn’t sure how to broach the subject matter, so he goes right in for it, no sugar coating shit. “I love it that you’re so fucking filthy.”
You’re absolutely horrified, tears burning your lash line to the brim. He knows. You let go and automatically turn over, hands wrapping around yourself and tucking beneath your breasts.
His heart constricts painfully, his arm elongated to reach for your waist. “Hey, hey. Baby, c’mon.”
“Eddie, just stop. Forget it, please.”
He can hear the desperation in your voice and it has him scooting impossibly closer, his arm tossing completely over your waist and pulling you back against him, his mouth finding that particular spot on your neck, a hot whisper coming off his mouth. “What if I liked that you liked it?”
“I’m a fucking freak.” You whimper.
Eddie chuckles, a throaty and soft rasp. “Listen, baby. I can assure that, out of the two of us, I’m the only real freak here.” Eddie’s hand splays across your abdomen, drifting, pressing. You squirm and your hips gravitate towards his backside.
He’s getting hard… Fuck.
“But Eddie, what normal girl gets off on seeing her boyfriend piss? Like… I’m fucking disgusting.”
“So you do get off by it, baby?
“I…” You heartbeat pulsates rapidly beneath your breast, feeling as if you’d skipped a step. “That’s not, no I don’t.”
Eddie is amused, not buying it. “You’re tellin’ me that if I checked your panties right now, you wouldn’t be soaking wet? Hmm?”
Your eyelids flutter closed and you take Eddie’s fingers as they press against your now open mouth, sucking them inside. He rocks you back into his cock, rolling his hips so you feel what this is all doing to him.
“Shit. That feels so good.” You hiss around his guitar playing digits.
“Yeah?” He’s nipping at the shell of your ear. “Know what feels even better, Y/N?”
You turn to face him, his fingers falling out with a wet pop, his other hand cradling the nape of your neck. Your voice is trembling when you answer him with a question you already know. “What?“
“Letting go. And I don’t know about you, but I need to.”
Your thighs wrap around the leg he’s slotted between them, tightening. He groans into your flesh, kissing you harshly, tongue finding yours in a wet slope of slippery domination. Moments pass and when you break to breathe, Eddie is pushing down on your abdomen, tone light and airy, yet heated and heavy. “You gotta go, baby?”
Like a true submissive to his gravitational dominance, you incline your head in a confirming nod.
“Yeah? Real bad?”
“I… don’t know.” And it’s a truthful answer. There wasn’t a pressing need on your bladder, but you felt… something. And not just that insane amount of slick coating your swollen cunt now.
“You wanna try for me, sweetheart? Be a real good girl?”
Your irises glistening have Eddie stroking your cheekbone with his thumb pad. “Only if you’re comfortable with it, honey. You know I’d never—“
“Yes, Sir. I wanna be your good girl.”
His cock throbs, his night wear suddenly too confining. He pushes off you and waves his hand towards his bedroom door and the open hall. “Go.”
You clamber out of the bed and down the corridor, with your heartbeat galloping full speed ahead, feeling as if it’s dusting your bones to ash. You aren’t surprised when you pull your pajama shorts and panties down after you get seated, to see that arousal stringing from the crotch to your pussy. A ring covered hand taps idly at the framework of the door, Eddie’s nude form standing in your sights, black polished fingernails at attention, his fingers wrapped around his girth. Your body heats up, eyes trying not to look at his demolished irises. “Look at me, Y/N.”
Fuck.
He’s stepping closer, a command clear. “Scoot back and spread your legs.”
“Eddie…”
“What? I have to go too. And I can’t do it when I’m fuckin’ hard, so you better hurry, because I can see how wet you are, and that’s not doing me any favors right now.”
Kicking off your shorts and underwear, you shift back a little on the seat, widening your legs. That ridiculous ache latches on and punches your insides, helping you let go in front of your boyfriend, who watches with a head tilt, his knees bending to a slight kneel between your open legs, as he too relieves himself. You have nothing to hold onto, so your fingers reach out and rest across the meat of your bare thighs. Eddie finishes before you, his cock swelling in his grip as he watches you, a wild smirk coating his flushed features.
Leaning in, he captures your mouth, his hand sliding down between your legs, two fingers pressing into you with an ease that sucks them inside your sopping wet walls. He’s moving his mouth down your jawline, to your neck, his fingers scissoring inside, thumb finding your clit. You’re reaching for his wrist, crying out, begging… you aren’t quite sure.
“You’re so fucking soaked that you’re dripping, baby. And I’m not just talking about the piss.”
Your toes curl, tipping into a point on the flooring.
“Please, Eddie…”
“Please, what? Maybe, please do… this?” He curls his fingers against that spongey spot, making you let out a scream that you didn’t know was in you.
That coil is beginning to tighten inside your stomach and Eddie feels you soaking his wrist with your cream and piss, clenching around his fingers. He pulls them out and orders you to stop, yanking you up and pinning you against the wall, lifting your right leg around his slender waistline, ripping your camisole down the middle to palm your tits. You’re discombobulated.
“Fuck,” You’re caught between a complain and a plea. “I wasn’t finished yet, Eddie.”
“You’re gonna finish on my dick, baby.” He taps his pre-cum slick head into your clit, drawing it down the damp seam of your pussy, before resting his forehead against yours. You slide a hand up his back, his necklace resting over your knuckles, your other hand brushing through his messy curls.
“Think you can do that, princess? Soak my dick before you cum all over it?”
You aren’t able to be vocal, head lolling back, receptive to his kiss as his fat cock parts your drenched folds and sinks inside your cunt, beginning an immediate rhythm. He doesn’t say anything for a few beats, letting you get used to his length as he always does, but then, oh then he is.
“Start going again for me, baby. Show me that you can be good.”
He doesn’t let you hide in his neck this time, tilting your chin in a tip, his eyes on yours. Your lashes are soaked in tears of a desire so high that you won’t come back down for days. And Eddie, his chest is heaving, his chocolate irises gone beneath a murky lake of black, skin sheathed in sprinkles of red flush. He bounces you into a particularly hard thrust, and you clamp down on him, making his swollen lips part. “Fuck, m’ gonna cum for you, baby. I’m right there.”
“Have to. Eddie, please, can I? Just, let me…” Is all your garbled frame of mind can come up with it.
“You wanna cum too, sweet girl? You’ve been the definition of a galactic goddess for me. Fucking do it, Y/N.”
Every cell in your body splits apart, you folding in and imploding, outwardly exploding in screams that dig from the depths of your diaphragm. The last bit comes from you in his plunging thrusts and it’s intensified by your orgasm that causes your vision to white out, your hand to pulling Eddie’s hair down to the roots. He swells inside your cunt, balls heavy and drawn, your arousal and spray soaking him down to his happy trail, and he cums, harder than he’s ever came in his entire twenty years of life, filling you full of him as he holds and helps you both ride it out until it subsides. It’s heavy breathing and holding each other, your leg being stroked softly by Eddie’s fingertips before he releases his grip on it. Your muscles are softly pliant, sated.
You hum with closed eyes, head back against the wall paneling. “Fuck, that was intense.”
Eddie chortles, your eyes opening to see him in time for another passionate kiss. On the saliva-strung break away, he’s checking in with you. “Was that okay, baby? You’re not too overwhelmed from it?”
“Did it feel like I was?” Still shy, but no longer ashamed, you giggle after responding.
Eddie shakes his head fondly, ruffling your hair and looking down at the floor. “We should probably clean this mess up and take a shower before Wayne gets home.”
Though you both know, with shared and agreeing Cheshire grins, that the night has just begun.
~*~
Tagging: @corrodedhawkins @ethereal27cereal @boldlyvoid @chaossmoonlights @prettyboyeddiemunson
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