#I would also put this into the same category as wondering if I had been switched at birth or anything of the like

[allisonreader]

Oh, another thing about the twins documentary that I watched, was that it made me think about how when I was younger I had wanted either a twin sister or a sister closer in age to me than my brothers are.

For a time, I even liked to pretend that my best friend throughout the end of elementary and high school was actually a long lost sister. It wasn't anything that I ever voiced out loud, but I definitely thought about it, even though she was born a month before me.

[reidmotif]

I’ve Got My Eye On You

Summary: Reader is a Special Surveillance agent assigned to spy on Spencer. He manages to see through her cover, and thoroughly enjoys the confrontation that follows.

Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader

Category: Smut

Content Warning: voyeurism, oral (f!receiving), unprotected penetrative sex, f!masturbation, slight dubcon regarding recorded sex, heavily based on that one scene in scandal, iykyk.

Word Count: 3.5k

Masterlist

I’d always been good at watching people. 

My life had been spent mostly to myself, divulging the information people offered without even realizing. When you talk less, you learn that body language, passing remarks, or even the quirk of an eyebrow gives away more than anyone ever realized– maybe more than an actual conversation at times. 

And I took it all in stride, not a single detail left unanalyzed. People were always surprised when I’d mention my observations, finding a way to explain a seemingly unexplainable situation, those around me wondering how on Earth I could’ve been privy to that. I’d always shrug at their queries. 

Pay more attention, I guess. 

It wasn’t a surprise that I’d ended up here, I suppose, in the end, as an Investigative Specialist for the FBI. I doubt that my listening skills were exactly what landed me the job, but I’d like to believe they contributed more than they actually did. Regardless, I’d never expected the result of the decisions I’d made over the years to lead to this– involved in spying on an agent of our own. 

The infamous "Dr Reid".

His specific circumstances had been shrouded in secrecy and mystery, apparently having just been let out of prison. (Prison? How’s he an agent then? Anyway, not my problem).

 The Bureau had been curious about erratic behavior on his part, and the string of discrepancies involving the unit he was involved in. Apparently, there had been multiple unforeseen and unprecedented events all occurring under the same team in a relatively small time-frame, and despite smaller investigations, nothing came out of them to warrant any real disciplinary action.  Probably why they brought me in, in the hopes of changing that. 

I’d been assigned to put up small, virtually undetectable cameras and listening devices within his apartment. 24/7 home surveillance, no exceptions. I couldn’t help but think that the guy really should invest in better apartment security, despite how easy his naivete made my job. His lack of caution surprised me, given the details I’d been given. For a guy who had a penchant for being framed by the ghosts of his past, he sure didn’t live like it.  Even as an FBI agent, he essentially had no technology to counter my own, and the height of his protection was a standard deadbolt. Was he insane? Unaware, somehow? Only time would tell, I suppose. And I had plenty of that, to watch and deduce the nature of his mind on my own terms. 

My time spent with Spencer resulted in one, overwhelming conclusion. Spencer Reid lived a relatively quiet life. His apartment was barely used, honestly, given the sporadic nature of his job. (Which was a shame, in my opinion, because it’s a nice apartment).  When he was at home, he seemed to remain quite unassuming. The positions I’d see him assume often were that of being hunched over on an aging leather sofa, pouring himself into grading papers, or creating lesson plans for his students. Oh, right. Did I mention he was also a professor? He is. I’d assume he likes the job, given how much of himself he gives into it, or maybe that was just who he was as a person. I wasn’t sure yet. 

I monitored his life outside of the apartment occasionally as well, just to see what intel I could gather with further investigation. There wasn’t much. Coffee shops. Book shops. Coffee. Books. Coffee- God, does the guy do anything else with his life? 

Most days, though, I’d liken him to butter spread too thinly over toast. Sleepless from nightmares that would have him walking around his apartment until daylight broke through the window panes. I felt exhausted just watching the guy, and it seemed insane that he could continue to live on when he left that apartment at the break of dawn. It didn’t seem like he had anyone to talk to, honestly. From what I was seeing, he wasn’t a threat to the Bureau, just a sad, middle-aged man who’d been dealt the most unfair of hands in life. 

I’m sure there’s a moral somewhere in all that. To waste your potential on something that gives so little back. Oh, well. My report was nearly finished at this point, and the most I could recommend the higher-ups was to get Spencer a better therapist, maybe. This one wasn’t really helping, it seemed. Besides that, his personal behavior wasn’t indicative of anything worrying to the interests of those managing him. 

At long last, it was my final night of watching him. Coincidentally, the date lined up with Halloween, and I couldn’t be more thrilled to finally be free of this specific survey job. Don’t get me wrong, Spencer seemed nice- but God, his life was boring. I don’t want to say it was like watching paint dry,  out of respect, but previous targets had offered at least some part of their life to be interested within. Spencer had nothing. No friends over, no gossip-like phone conversations, no drunk wanderings home. Nothing! I know he didn’t sign up to be watched, but God. 

Like, come on. Give me anything here. 

Needless to say, I’d become accustomed to the quiet, and this night was no different. If he was following schedule, he should be home right about … now. 

Now? 

Now… 

Silence. 

Spencer was definitely a creature of habit, so to not see him adhere to the routine he’d so meticulously stuck to in the past was a bit jarring, but I assumed he was just running late. 

A few hours later, I reasoned he must be running really really late. It was bordering on midnight, and he still wasn’t home. I checked train schedules, possible reports of a car crash, just about anything that could keep him from his scheduled appearance at home. 

I was just about to call my supervisor to look into whether or not he’d been called out on a surprise case, but that’s when the door of his apartment creaked open, and I felt my shoulders deflate in relief. Okay, he was home. He was going to go to bed and- 

He wasn’t alone. 

Spencer was dressed in all black, a leather belt adorned with a gold belt buckle being the only color his outfit brought. He wore tiny devil’s ears upon his head, the headband pushing down on the mop of curls that sat atop his head. He looked absolutely delicious, if I must say myself, and it seemed the woman in his arms would agree with me. 

He practically pulled her into his apartment, kicking his door in with his leg before slightly fumbling with the lock. As soon as the mechanism slipped into place, his hands were all over her, pressing her flush against his body, as if he couldn’t bear to have any space between them. 

For all the time I’d been watching him, none of his behavior indicated the presence of any kind of significant other, so this girl must be a stranger. If this is how Spencer treated strangers though, I was surprised he didn’t have a barrage of women lining up at his door every night. 

His lips absolutely devoured the girl, his hand cradling the side of her face, before his thigh slipped in between her legs, possibly to soothe a building ache that had built up there in the time they’d spent together, which I found entirely possible, considering I, personally, was heated from simply watching. 

I watched the pixels on the screen with such precision, innocuous shades of red, green and blue painting the most sinful of images. I found myself noting the way his hand snuck up the girls’ dress, the way her breathing hitched as she pulled back, watching as Spencer presumably played with her clit. I could feel myself squeezing my thighs together, recognizing just how wrong it was to be turned on by the scene in front of me, but I couldn’t stop myself. It wasn’t as if this was the first time a target had behaved sexually in front of me. (Or in front of the camera, I suppose.) I’d seen and heard just about anything you could think of, but this was different- in a way. To see Spencer so filthy, so confident, so- interesting. It lit a fire in me that burned with every passing moment he touched this girl. 

I’m able to watch him circle over her panties in a way that has her groaning directly into his ear, a smug grin plastering his face as he watches her every reaction. 

“Like that?” He murmurs, and I’ve never heard his voice so fucking deep.

She nods frantically, and it only serves to widen his grin. I can feel myself rocking slightly in my own chair, doing anything to try and soothe the fast growing arousal within me, unable to stop from imagining myself in her place. His hands, the feel of hot breath down my neck- 

I’m stopped dead in my tracks, however, when his eyes suddenly shift to the camera closest to him, his eyebrow raising, as if in challenge. He continues to whisper in the girl’s ear, and has the galls to wink. I’m horrified, a very sudden and intense heat rising to my cheeks. I can only watch for a second more, before he’s suddenly pulling her away, and I realize he’s taken her  within one of the only blind spots within the apartment. 

I’m scrambling to turn off the feed, stunned into silence whilst, my heart beating uncontrollably and eccentrically. Oh god. He knew. He knew and he did that?! 

I stare into the empty space, a multitude of thoughts inhabiting my brainscape. On one hand, the aplomb shown in that situation was commendable, since most people would react to the knowledge that they’d been secretly watched in their own home for the past few months in a much more hostile way. On the other hand, how did he even acquire that knowledge? The cameras were virtually undetectable, and he’d never let on that he was aware of their presence, and I’d know, considering how closely I’d watched him. 

I shake off the thoughts, focusing on something other than the overwhelming mortification coursing through me now.  

Alright, tomorrow, get into his apartment, remove the cameras, and hopefully never have to look at the man again. In any capacity, honestly. 

When daylight broke, I turned on the cameras for the final time, a bit more sheepish, knowing he was aware of the devices plaguing his home. However, it seemed like he was once again pretending like he wasn’t aware of the looming existence of them, sending his female companion off her merry way once they woke up, before going about his normal routine, heading out of the apartment for what was most likely his morning coffee and then afternoon lecture at the university. 

That was my cue. I turned off the cameras,  quickly making my way out to sneak into his residence, the heavy door offering little resistance to my advances, my movements quiet and undetectable. 

I’m  in the process of removing the final camera I had placed in his bedroom, hidden behind a copy of  The Sign of Four. Doyle. He had good taste, I could give him that. 

I’m just about to turn around and get the hell out of there, when I hear a voice behind me. 

“I noticed that one first, you know.”

I turn around slowly, embarrassed and slightly fearful to find Spencer’s eyes meeting mine. I’d watched him for so long, but seeing him now– his eyes were so beautiful. The camera didn’t do him justice.

He continues, despite the silence. “The other ones were harder to spot, I’ll give you that, but once I knew where they were, it was a bit obvious, don’t you think?” 

I’m speechless. My mouth is agape, and all he seems to do is smile at my lack of prose. 

“Don’t look so surprised. I know this apartment. I’m not here a lot, but I spend enough time to know when things have been shifted around.” His tone is cheeky, and he pauses, almost theatrically to add on:

“I’m sure you knew that though.”  His smile turns into more of a smirk. 

God, did he have to be so hot?

“Are you going to complain to the Bureau?” I manage out, keeping my eyes steady on him. 

“Did you find anything of note to tell them?” He responds, tilting his head with curiosity. 

I shake my head vehemently. “No, um. Nothing pertinent to say.” I get my words out in a hurry, my gaze continually trained on him. 

He meets my eyes with the same stare. “Then I don’t have much of a reason to complain.” 

I nod solemnly. I’m wondering where this situation will lead- what either of our next moves are. Before I can ponder long though, he surprises me and takes a step closer.

“I saw you, you know.” He says. “Thought I was going insane when the same pretty girl kept showing up at the bookstore and coffee shop out of the blue, but I’ve never been one to believe in coincidences.” 

“Oh.” I whisper. I really wasn’t as good as I thought I was. 

“You really shouldn’t beat yourself up.” He says, chuckling with some mirth. “Again, I’m observant. I notice these things. That, and you’re pretty.” He says, forward. “So, more of a reason to notice.” 

“Oh.” I reply, yet again, dumbfounded by the events currently transpiring. 

“Yes, oh.” He chuckles, before he starts to move closer yet again. “Tell me. Were you watching last night?” He murmurs, his voice dropping a bit deeper as he directly addresses the elephant in the room. 

I give a movement of affirmation, because at this point, what could he do? What could I do? 

“So you saw.” He mumbles, moving to position himself right in front of me, his eyes darkened and laser focused on my figure. 

“Yes.” I whisper, my voice hushed as our proximity decreased, his breath fanning out over my face now. I’d be uncomfortable, if I wasn’t so distracted. 

“Tell me.” He whispers, letting his calloused finger finally touch my skin, running down my neck. “Did it turn you on? Watching me with her?” 

I feel the familiar heat of embarrassment rise to my cheeks, my eyes suddenly widening not only due to the sudden proximity, but also the scandalous nature of his words. Did he mean for me to watch? Was that his plan all along? What was this sick and twisted game he was playing?

“Did it.. get you off?” He whispers, his lips leaning in to kiss lightly at the side of my neck where his finger once was. 

I freeze, leaning into his touch and going statue-like all at once. I can’t help the shakiness of my voice when I reply. “I.. wasn’t neutral.” 

“Mm.” He murmurs, kissing now at my jawline. “Did you get off? When she did?” He whispers.

“I didn’t watch that long.” I reply, helplessly, as I feel his hands start to envelop my waist, pulling me closer to him. 

“What a shame.” He mumbles. “I think you would’ve liked the show. I did it for you.” 

At this point, I can barely speak, a slight moan escaping me instead of a coherent reply as his lips continue to leave warm, wet kisses on the expanse of my flesh. 

“I’m sure you’re curious.” He says, his voice soft and seductive. “Would you like me to show you what we did?”

There’s no hesitation, finally, a resounding thought I can translate from brain-to-mouth for him, in complete certainty.

“Yes.” I manage out, breathlessly. 

He makes a noise of satisfaction, quickly pushing me onto the bed. 

“I’d already gotten her wet by touching her before, but if my suspicions are correct.” He murmurs, his hands working deftly to undo my jeans and feel the wetness that had accumulated in between my thighs. “You already are.” He finishes. 

I let out a small whimper as his fingers touch the heated flesh, unable to help my sensitivity to his small, calculated strokes over my clit through my underwear. His fingers starts to move a bit more aggressively, upon feeling the wet patch that had formed there, the flimsy fabric doing little to hide the stickiness he was now collecting on his fingers. He quickly pulls them off as well though, bringing his slightly damp fingers to his mouth, tasting the hint of my arousal that had accumulated there. His eyes were dark, watching my face for any reaction, and in that moment, I know all he can see is pure want. 

I can see the same hunger within his eyes, and I feel a rush of pride as the approval radiates off of him. 

“What next?” I whisper, already desperate for his next slew of ministrations. I don’t care how needy I looked. I was needy. I’d spent so long watching him, and now he was here.

“She wanted my mouth.” He murmurs, kneeling at the edge of the bed. His thumb brushes over my clit, his tongue running against plump, pink lips, wetting them, watching over me with a predatory gaze. 

Before I can respond, he’s suddenly everywhere, ducking his head and allowing his tongue to brush over my sex in broad, wet strokes. My response is immediate, my hips bucking up to meet him in a frenzied motion. It seems that he relishes in whatever control he can have in this situation, because he quickly holds down my hips in a firm grip, squeezing the fat there while he continued to ravage me. 

I can barely look at him, pretty brown locks splayed in his face, his lips moving hypnotically against my cunt. Little whimpers escape me, absolutely aching for more. He seems to catch on, and flicks his tongue over me, before suckling against my clit. It’s wet, messy, and the picture of debauchery– and it’s enough to drive me over the edge, my hands gripping the sheets as I cry out his name. 

He seems to be unaffected, getting off his knees, his mouth glistening with my release. The sight makes me wish he could do it again, but before I can get a word in, he’s positioning himself over me, caging me against the bed. 

“Then I fucked her.” He whispers, starting to undo his belt with his free hand. “Can I?” 

I nod, feeling a wave of anticipation, before registering the sensation of the head of his cock nudging my entrance. I feel my chest tighten, watching him with bated breath, absolutely exhilarated. 

“Relax.” He whispers, kissing the lobe of my ear. “You’re in good hands.” 

He utters the last word, before sliding into me, a hushed gasp leaving the both of us. He groans in pleasure, his eyes fluttering shut as he takes in the feel of my warm, wet cunt around him. He takes a moment, before he’s setting a steady pace, his hips bucking rhythmically into me in a way that’s designed to bring us both so much pleasure. 

I can’t help the string of moans that come out with every slide of his cock inside me, my legs wrapping around his waist, urging him closer than he already is. My hands grip onto his shirt, clawing onto the fabric to find any purchase, wanting– no, needing him on me. 

Is it odd to wish a stranger could crawl into your skin itself? 

“Fuck, Spencer.” I moan, unabashedly. “You feel so good.”

“You do too.” He groans, his arms braced on either side of my head before gently lowering himself to crash his lips against mine in a messy kiss. 

I can feel myself barreling towards release, as is he, if the twitch of his cock inside me were to mean anything. It’s not long before his hand reaches in between where our bodies are met, rubbing my clit in fast, small circles. It’s intense in the best way possible, my body barely being able to process how good it felt in the moment. 

“Come for me.” He moans, in between kisses. “Wanna feel you around me. Please.”

I can’t help but obey his words, my cunt convulsing around him in obedience as he subsequently finds his release inside me, groaning loudly as his hips thrust erratically. 

He pulls out, and we’re a tangle of limbs, sweaty and sated, breathing heavy. 

Of course, it’s him, yet again, to break the silence. 

“Two things.” He mumbles, breathlessly. 

“Mm.” I reply, weakly, my head a mess of airiness and complacency after the orgasm he’d just brought me to. 

“One. I want your name.” He says, rolling to his side to get a better look at my face. 

“That can be arranged.” I murmur, nodding dreamily. 

“Second.” He whispers, kissing my cheek. His voice takes on a teasing quality to it, before leaning to brush his lips against my ear.  

“You missed a camera. Behind the plant. They don’t stop recording, do they?” 

okay wowww. clearly this was meant for halloween, if you couldn't tell! this is one of those pieces where i'm like.. hmm .. do i like this? question mark? do i want to put it out? hmm .. but regardless, i hope you guys enjoyed it!! please, please like, reblog, and comment if you enjoyed!!! it is sooo important as an author that i get some feedback and know what you guys think, in any capacity. i truly appreciate all of it <33 thank you for reading, thank you for everything!!!

[darklordofthesimp]

Underneath (König x Reader)

Summary: You'd been looking for some time alone when you'd gone to the shooting range at nearly midnight. König clearly had the same idea.

Requested by Anon: #47 I forget how to speak whenever you're around and it's embarrassing.

A/N: Honestly, this felt sooo trash. My apologies anon, König was difficult to write here.

Categories: Hurt/Comfort || Fluff || Mutual Pining

Warnings: Mild Swearing

The night air was crisp, your breath leaving small clouds of white to trail behind you. You adjusted the strap of the weapon slung across your shoulder and shivered. Next time you’d have to dress warmer if you wanted to take a late night stroll, but you knew full well you’d make the same mistake.

As KorTac’s resident marksman, the firing range was almost like your second home. Your sniper rifle was an extension of your limbs and this place gave you the opportunity to exercise it. It would be worth the walk and worth the cold.

You glanced at your watch as you entered the facility. It was 2300 hours, no one in their right mind would be at the range this late on a Friday night. You’d have the floor to yourself, blowing off steam with unlimited ammunition into the early hours of the morning: the perfect way to start off the weekend.

As you entered the doors and rounded the corner, your breath left you in a gasp and you stumbled backward.

“König!”

The giant came to a screeching halt in an attempt to not bowl you over, his eyes wide as he appraised you. He held a sniper rifle in his right hand, the weapon looking like a Nerf gun in comparison to the sheer size of him. Your heart thrashed wildly in your chest at the scare of unexpected company.

“Jesus,” you rasped, a small laugh slipping from you lips. “What’re you doing here so late?”

There was a short pause as the man gathered his bearings, the both of you thrown off by each other’s presence. “Probably the same as you.”

You nodded your head with a small shrug. You should have guessed that König wouldn’t be at the club with the rest of the team. He was the resident introvert, maniacal on the battlefield but withdrawn in the barracks.

König was an enigma.

It’s what drew you to him like a moth to a flame. Although, the man avoided you where he could. You guessed he wasn’t as curious about you as you were about him.

“Is this why you’re better than most with a sniper?” You nodded towards his rifle but his eyes remained glued on you. “You shoot at midnight?”

It was mean to be a joke but there was some truth to your question. König was one of the better snipers in KorTac, as though he were born with a natural talent for the role. You wondered if he’d ever consider pushing for a change in positions.

“Better than most,” he agreed quietly with a shrug, but then his eyes sparkled with amusement. “However, I shoot at midnight to be better than you.”

Your heart stuttered at the words. You knew he was joking, or at least attempting to break the ice, but it always felt good to hear words of affirmation. Snipers were very much out of sight and out of mind until you needed them and you’d rarely received compliments on your work outside of training.

“Well,” you breathed, shifting the weight of the rifle on your back. It was cold but suddenly there was warmth blooming along your neck as König watched you intently. “Now I wanna see if you’re going to put me out of a job.”

König’s eyes widened and you saw him hesitate.

“You,” he cleared his throat, “you want to watch me shoot?”

You offered him a small smile in response, it was cheeky but not enough to alarm him. The last thing you wanted was to make a 6’10 mountain of a man think that you were here to laugh at him

You knew that König was a good shot, though you also knew he was not on the same playing field as you. Something told you he needed a win, though. If watching him shoot and complimenting his ability would give him something warm on such a frigid day, then it would be the least you could do.

After all, you don’t go to the range at midnight on a Friday night unless you’re lonely.

“Actually,” König began, suddenly shifting on his feet uneasily. “I’ve been wanting to ask you something.”

You nodded your head, indicating for the man to continue. Silence swept into the conversation as König’s gaze flickered from your rifle to the floor, his hands moving to rest behind his back. You could tell his fingers were fidgeting even though he’d hid them from your view.

Finally, he spoke. “I wanted to ask for your help, I’m having trouble adjusting this rifle.”

Your mouth fell open and you blinked at him dumbly.

The giant blinked back.

“Yes!” You said with a start, realizing he was waiting for your response. “Of course- yeah. Lay down and set her up as best you can while I go offload my shit.”

König let loose a breath, his shoulders relaxing from where they’d been bunched. The sniper’s hood that he wore should have made him difficult to read, but his body language was beyond expressive.

When you returned from laying your shit down in the next aisle, König was on his stomach and those long legs were stretched out to full length. Again, you marvelled at the size of him.

He was peering down the sight of his rifle, a frustrated sigh deflating his chest as you looked down on him. You could see what was wrong with his positioning, then the actual rifle would be an entirely different beast to tackle.

“König,” you brought his attention back to you as your eyes skimmed over his body, watching for any flaws you may have missed. When you looked back at him, the man was watching you from above his shoulder. Your heart skipped a beat at the intensity of that emerald gaze, the determination to find out how to better himself.

You let loose a breath.

“Can I fix your position for you?” The question was soft but König’s hand flexed against his weapon anyway.

“Of course.”

You started with his legs, grabbing the inside of his right knee to push it upward. He helped you tucking it up so that it sat parallel to his body.

“It absorbs the recoil without shifting your line of fire,” you explained, and you saw his head nod from above the contour of his back. You stood over him, your feet planted on either side of his waist in an attempt to see the angle his body lay on.

Finally, you made your way to his arms, lowering yourself beside him. That green gaze flickered towards you, taking in your bent over form and settling on where you rested on both your knees.

He looked away as his breath hitched.

“Pick your elbows up,” you murmured, leaning over him as he lifted his arms. You tucked them a bit closer to where he had them initially, your chest brushing against the back of his head as you moved. His biceps were hard beneath your fingers and you swallowed thickly. “Now lean into them outward so the skin of your elbows is stretched.”

Again, the man obeyed.

“See how everything feels so much tighter?” You asked, leaning back onto your knees with your hands on the floor behind you.

König groaned at the sight.

You frowned.

“Is…” you cleared your throat, sitting straight. “Is it not good? I can adjust it if –“

“It’s fine,” König said quickly, his voice strained.

Your heart sunk at the urgency in his words, as though he were impatient. You thought that this was what he wanted, he had asked for your help.

“Well,” you rubbed the back of your neck with a sigh. “Give it a shot then, big guy.”

Big guy.

König missed the target.

You gawked at the small screen bolted to the floor between your bodies. When your eyes flicked over to the man lying next to you, he closed his eyes with a sigh.

“Try again,” you tried to keep your voice neutral but to miss the target entirely was a pretty big feat. Especially for someone like König who, usually, was an excellent shot.

This time, the bullet had barely caught the edge of the cardboard. The screen emitted a small beep, informing you both that he’d missed the centre aiming mark by 2,876 millimetres.

If that was a person, he’d have taken some fabric off of his shirt sleeve.

König sat up suddenly, a low growl reverberating in his chest. “Sheiße!”

“Is it the rifle?” You questioned as he rested his back against the isle wall, dropping his hands against his knees. His head fell rearward, gaze moving to the ceiling and for a second there he looked truly hopeless.

You didn’t receive a response.

“If it’s the positioning then-“

König’s head snapped upright, his eyes settling on you with an expression you’d never seen on him. You felt like you were burning.

“It’s you,” he said simply.

Your mouth dried.

“Oh.”

You stood to your feet without another word. Your chest felt heavy, and your skin stung as though the words had been a whip bearing down on your body. Embarrassment flooded your cheeks as a cold chill trickled down your spine.

You hadn’t realized how cold it was in that room.

Before you could walk from the aisle, König was on his feet. He stood before you, hands raised as though attempting to placate your or surrender. He was careful not to touch you, but the way he leaned in made you think that he wanted to.

“Not,” he stumbled over the words, they were desperate and choked. “Not like that. Never like that.”

You stared at him incredulously.

“Don’t leave,” König murmured, stepping into your space. Your head was craned so that you could see him, though eventually you gave up and tossed your gaze to the side. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“What did you mean, then?”  Your voice was hard, and you heard him suck in a breath. “You ask me to help you then don’t talk to me when I do.”

After a pregnant pause, a hand came to rest against your upper arm and you forced yourself to stay still. When a finger tucked itself beneath your chin, forcing your eyes upward, your knees trembled dangerously beneath you.

“I’m not ignoring you, I swear it.” König’s words fell from his lips in a tumble, that emerald gaze intent, “I just forget how to speak whenever you’re around and it’s embarrassing.”

Your jaw would have fallen open had it not been for his fingers holding it.

The silence was heavy as his words settled and you couldn’t think of a single thing to respond to him with. How were you meant to tell him that you felt the same way? How were you meant to express the effect that he had on you without sounding like a child?

Eventually, his fingers slipped from your skin and a chill fell over your body at his absence.

König took a step back, his body rigid.

“I’m sorry,” he rasped, his shoulders squared, and his eyes cast downward. “That was inappropriate, I shouldn’t have- “

“Don’t apologize,” your voice was barely a whisper, but the words echoed like a gunshot in the space between you. “Don’t you dare take that back.”

König watched you carefully from beneath the hood.

You decided, as his fingers slowly returned to your skin, that tonight you’d be under that hood with him.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Must you, Japan? has become Thank You, Japan

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

BL OLYMPICS! Week 3

This is my last week of passing out metals in various sporting events, as part of the weekly updates.

Aug 2024 Week 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

Century of Love (Weds Gaga) eps 9-10fin - There were a lot more unnecessary dramatic speeches than there was practical medical aid being administered. Very extra, boys. I wonder how long it took them to get that "birds meet hug" shot? Meanwhile, great grandpa‘s attitude that he knows best in every way is thoroughly annoying, and yet absolutely appropriate to his age. My great gramps (RIP), had he had the body of a 20-year-old, would behave in exactly the same self-righteous know-it-all way. The doctor is great. I would like him to get his own romance please? What happens when you are the villain in someone else's reincarnation story? There's a whole fanfic there. And yes I cried. I am a sap for this kinda thing.

Final thoughts:

This is a great little show about a young man who fell in love with a pretty girl 100 years ago, and when she died in his arms, he was cursed to live until he could meet her reborn self. Only this time around, she’s reborn into the body of a man. I love it when Thailand gets all up in its own historical business and reincarnation and shizz. I like this pair (it’s not DaouOffroad’s fault I didn’t enjoy most of their first series.) Daou’s wushu is pretty snazzy and we got a fun meet cute. (Erm... Remeet cute? Meet cute 2.0?) Plus this is a very PRETTY show. Despite some ham handed comedy moments, this ultimately has more in common with something like I Feel You Linger in the Air meets First Love Again, then (as one might expect) Until We Meet Again or The Director Who Buys Me Dinner. The leads turned in great performances, although Daou outclassed everybody else on that screen. It’s a good story and a great BL. I’m not sure this is going in my rewatch rotation, but I can’t find any major faults with it beyond a certain level of camp that is sadly endemic to lackorns. Also I’m going to give it credit as the kind of BL that one could safely recommend to lovers of melodrama and historical romance, without having to qualify it as “good for a BL.” It was, to put it succinctly, simply a VERY ENJOYABLE show. 

Under those auspices I really can’t give it anything less than a 9/10. 

Bronze in Fencing

My Love Mix-Up Th (Fri YT) ep 10 of 12 - It’s cute. They were cute. I enjoyed it a lot. I talk quite a bit about why they're using nai as a you pronoun here:

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans (Fri iQIYI) ep 6 of 8 - Honestly the side couple is truly stellar in this show. I wasn’t sure about them at first but now I absolutely love them. Not sure how they are going to resolve such intense dislike (from JJ) by the end of the series. But I’m interested to see them try.

Meanwhile, there isn’t anything else airing right now that makes me laugh as much as the behind-the-scenes from this show. Highly recommended.

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) eps 1-2 of 12 - Oh it is so much fun. I’m particularly delighted that our musician is a drummer and I don’t have to listen to him sing... I hope. I’ve been waiting for Big to lead a BL forever. I’m disposed to enjoy this. We can all be confident in one thing, the kisses are going to be great. I like the side couple too, very indulgent daddy. While I am disturbed by the tortoise in the tiny tank, I love the extrovert friendship group. They remind me of my own college crew. It is a cute premise, but I will need them to actually be together in the same room, looking longingly at each other a smooching within the next couple of episodes.

YouTube served me both episodes 1 & 2, and I don’t think it was meant to. So this may be next week's review as well.

The Trainee (Sun YouTube) ep 6 of 12 - I wasn’t wild about this ep or where this show is going. But I enjoyed the language play. 

Gold in Linguistic Gymnastics

(my new favorite sport)

Sunset X Vibes (Sat iQIYI) ep 9 of 12 - Wow. Sam admitted it just out loud like that! Right after a betrayal? Balls on that boy. Worked on Yo tho. Too well, actually. I wish Yo had made him suffer and dragged him over the coals for a while. But I guess Yo really really likes him back. Meanwhile, the GL side plot also moved quite rapidly. A lot happened in this episode.

I Saw You in My Dream (Weds Gaga) ep 4 of 12 - Them ALL jumping into the water was totally ridiculous. It’s still a little slow, because it is a pulp, but I’m rather enjoying it.

Knock Knock Boys (Thurs Gaga) ep 12fin - Almond and Latte were cute. The breakfast with the four of them was funny. I did laugh a lot. Almond getting "first time" advice from his two resident gay dads (or at least trying to) was super sweet. Also I got a lot of smiley kisses. Nice final ep.

Ultimately how do I feel about this show?

A story about 4 boys of differing personalities who end up living together and pair up, falling in love. Slow moving and waffling, with some artificially generated family drama makes this a classic Thai pulp except that in general it's a smiley kiss of a show. It had plenty of good qualities like great communication and sexual rep (including toys, first time, safe sex, and sexual identities). The heat levels were on point and well executed, and the performances were good. It’s just that the script and the directing were lackluster, rendering it ultimately forgettable. Still, fine on a rainy afternoon with some camomile tea or whatever. 7/10 

Love Sea (Sun iQIYI) ep 9 of 10 - I’m getting some sort of PTSD from this show, It is making me feel like I’m the problem. Trash watch

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Cosmetic Playlover (Japan Tues Gaga) eps 1-2 of 8 - Anyone surprised by this jump in the standings? Yeah, probubly not. Anygay... this show is GREAT. Warped af but great. Lemme try to explain.

I actually said out loud during ep 1, "Well this is boundary pushing." By which I mean mine and everybody elses. But it’s Japan, *checks watch* it’s about time they turned out something edging into unpalatable and kinky. And because it’s Japan, I’m more forgiving than I would be were this show nested in the clumsy hands of say... Thailand. So actually this being me, and me being of questionable taste, I’m enjoying this show a lot.

You want me to list the ways? Sure.

Younger seme with grabby hands.

The younger one identified the elder gay as his personal property and it’s now: single motivation, on target, against all odds.

Uke cares about his work and not much else.

Seme cares about the uke and not much else.

Uke is gonna make this boy WORK for it.

That one particularly Japanese style of obsession that I actually adore.

Passes the sniff test!

I’m being reminded of that KBL Love Mate. Which I believe I enjoyed but no one else did. For exactly this set of tropes. Only Japan is better suited to handle them. For me this is a case of:

Must you,Japan? = Oh yes? Well, thank you very much, Japan.  

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 8 of 10 - enter the evil girl character. Yawn.

Takara's Treasure AKA Takara No Vidro (Japan Mon Gaga) ep 6 of 10 - It is what it is. 

It's airing but...

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 2 of 12 - I did not catch ep 2 before they took it down from USA YT. I don’t know why it’s down. Either they got a deal for distribution off YouTube or there’s some sort of scandal. Frankly, I wasn't particularly impressed with ep 1 so I’m not rabid to find wherever it’s gone or why. Still, perhaps someone will let us know the sitch in a comment? It's a me problem. I'm figuring it out.

Sugar Dog Life (Japan Sun ????) 10 eps - OMG a uni student who looks too young and a... COP. GAH. The subversion and kink of it all. Why can't I find it? Do I have to go grey?

4 Minutes (Thai Netflix/Grey) - A rich boy at uni suddenly gains the supernatural power to see four minutes into the future. I have a source, but I've decided to hold off and binge if it ends okay, since it's only 8 eps. I depend upon y'all to tell me if it's safe.

Meet You at the Blossom (China) - it's your funeral (or, more likely, one of the main characters'). You can argue but... statistics. You know my feelings on this matter. MY BLOG, remember?

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer IS COMING IN SEPTEMBER!!!! (Yeah this is gonna sit here until then)

Next Week Looks Like This:

Ooo, nice spread.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Still Coming This Month!

8/12 First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) 12 eps - About a singer with stage fright and his timid fan stars Charles (H4 the puppy one) and Michael Chang (the youngster in My Tooth Your Love), plus side couple featuring a Thai actor Jame (Koh in Gen Y) and Liu Min Ting (of Guardian fame). What a damn tean. I can't wait. With thier powers combined!

8/13 Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues YT) 10 eps - supposedly Jinlo with air this on their YT channel. Stars August (Love Sick) so I'm excited despite Jinlo's poor reputation. From the trailer it looks like it's following the original pretty closely... just Thai style. GIMMEEEEE!!!!

8/16 The Last Time (Thai Fri YT) ? eps - Convoluted story of loss and possible reincarnation or something.

8/22 The On1y One (Taiwan Thurs Gaga) 12 eps - announced in 2023 this one has a high school set stepbrothers trope and is reputed to be high heat. From Taiwan! It's made for me. Based on a novel Mou Mou from the Your Name Engraved Herein folks, so it could go dark. Still, I'm very excited.

8/22 The Paradise of Thorns (Thai movie) theater release - Jeff Satur is back but this does not look like a BL (the gay lover's death is the inciting event). More in Goodbye Mother vein. Looks dark and dramatic. He opposite and extremely well known actor Toey Pongsakorn who has never done gay before.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENT

Linguistic flirting trope! One of my all time favorites. FANTASTIC. (I did keep hearing Gun yelling Papiiiiiii! in my head tho.)

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

[donutwatches]

MHA 3.3 - Kota - part 1/3

This is a watch-a-long blog, so no spoilers past this episode please!

Didn't he already do that last season? Did I imagine that? I love that his training is creating the perfect bath temperature.

Apparently Midoriya's training is getting beaten up by a furry. I wonder what he is going to tell his Mom when she asked him what he got up to at summer camp? "Well...there were these park rangers dressed as cats".

What would class 1A do without Iida keeping it together 24/7? Everyone is dead on their feet, but Iida is like "Look alive people, we're about to make the greatest curry of all time".

HIS TINY SMILE. This was a small detail, but it was so moving. Just lighting a fire for cookin and making his classmates smile made him happy. In seasons 1&2 he was so shut off socially.

He is finding out that the part of his quirk that he rejected and hated for so long can help people, and that he can use it in a positive way.

Momo's power comes from food! She can make weapons from her body by eating cake, what a dream.

"It's like poo". Sero, noooooo! Why did he have to make it gross? lol

There is a full doozy essay incoming. I went ham. So don't click 'keep reading' unless you actually want to keep READING.

What Kota says in this episode got me spiraling into essay territory. Kota's point of view has helped a lot of MHA's themes click into place for me, but these thoughts have been brewing for me since season 1.

Categorizing people and placing labels on them can lead to dehumanization. The 'villain' label makes people who commit crimes less than human, and the 'hero' label elevates people into being more than human. Either way, dehumanizing people has consequences, and in Kota's perspective, it got his parents killed.

Someone labeled as a 'villain' can think, well I'm already called a villain, I might as well act that way. Someone labelled as a 'hero' is pressured to live up to being put on a pedestal, and that can lead to failure, or hypocrisy (like Endeavor's outside hero image conflicting with behind closed doors abuse).

The villains versus heroes narrative feeds a cycle where they are in perpetual competition with each other to negative results for the community. As if crime and justice are the same as competing sports teams, like red team vs blue team. This leads to what Kota says, "they're all showing off", and end up "killing each other".

I have had jobs where I worked with kids, and I saw social labeling play out. Some kids got labeled as 'trouble makers'. The kids saw that they got attention for challenging behavior, and it got worse. I have heard a kid state "I'm a bad kid" outright, and they internalized that as part of their identity. It is hard to undo the damage.

It reminds me of Shinso from last season, as an example of a teen being labeled a villain by his peers. He fought hard to reject being put in that category, but many real life teens don't escape the labeling.

There are also kids that get singled out as 'golden children'. These kids feel pressured to be perfect, and can struggle with their flawed human identity not matching their 'golden' reputation.

Bakugo is an example of an over-praised kid that develops a superiority complex. He is insecure about not being the best, because he was categorized as 'the best' at age five. I think 'troublemaker' versus 'golden child' is a small scale version of the 'villain' versus 'hero' in MHA.

These categories lead us to making blanket assumptions about individuals who fit the right image. All might is the symbol of peace, so he must be perfect, right? But the show reveals that All Might, while he is a good man, is a flawed human being. We see him struggling to upkeep the shiny symbol he has created, at the cost of his health and social life.

I wonder if MHA is going to explore a villain that could have been a good citizen, but got trapped by how society has cornered them into a 'villain' labeled box? I think this might be the major theme of the entire story. I've cracked it, I can stop here, I don't even need to watch anymore episodes, bye! ;p

"My friend", ok Deku, you're not fooling anyone.

The starry night backgrounds in this scene are beautiful!

This montage of Midoriya trying to force a quirk to happen almost killed me.

It takes me back to the 1st episode where Deku's opening line is "we are not all created equal", and the episode shows us both him and Bakugo being put into opposite social boxes based on their quirks.

Deku was labeled bad/useless because he was quirkless, and this flashback underlines how much it hurt him, but he was saved by how strongly he held to his ideals of heroism. That is the positive flip side of the 'hero' label. It gave Deku something to look up to and live for.

Kota isn't ready to accept that rejecting the realities of hero society is going to be more painful in the long run. He is too little, and trying to process so much grief, it breaks my heart.

What also breaks my heart, is that Deku is speaking from experience. He has lived quirkless in a hero society, and rejecting the reality of his quirkless-ness back then caused him a lot of hurt too.

This is such a great exchange. MHA doesn't do a lot of quieter character building moments, but this talk between Kota and Deku was so good.

Part 2 is here

Masterlist

TAGLIST

@jessiedead @blackaquokat @granny-griffin @champion-prism @bicheetopuff @setfiretotheshadows @hyperfixations-and-cringe

[nyazhis-jsablr]

Battle of the Blixers - Finale Results

“Welcome to the final post of the Battle of the Blixers! I’m your host Step, and it was a very fun and intense competition thus far!”

“It was very fun seeing every submission, as well as how the contest played out! I will definitely miss doing this.

“But that aside, the end is now upon us, and with that, let’s see who won this entire thing!”

PLACEMENT POINTS

“So first off, we have the placement points! These points will be awarded to the competitors based on their placement on the podium at the end of C5!”

“And here they are!”

“Welp, it’s how it always was! Blixter & Eclipses in the top two, with everyone else fighting for 3rd, in this case, the other Blixter!” “In any case, let’s head to Category 2!”

ABSTRUSE DECIPHER POINTS

“This is the prize for guessing the song correctly!”

“Blixer Eclipses got the song correctly, so he’s getting 3 extra points!”

AUDIENCE VOTE

“Now, we have the audience vote! We already saw the outcome, with Blixter winning over the audience yet again! Let’s award everyone’s points now!”

JURY VOTE

“Now for the jury vote! The way this works is that the jury lists the entries from 1-3, their least favorite being 1 and most favorite being 3. Afterwards, I tally up the results and get the final number!”

“Before I reveal the points though, here’s a statement from the one and only Blixer Kunzite! literally hes the only one that voted during the voting period”

JSABAddict’s submission:

“What a very interesting fight! Didn’t expect such a…brute, to have skillful moves like that. I’d say this one caught my eye, sad that they weren’t able to kill their opponent but, oh well! As for the ‘begging’, as you put it, poor reasons. I believe them when they said they joined for fun and thrill but, c’mon! What about the glory and respect you would get from winning!? Ah, apologies for the yelling. Now then, I’d say they’re in between, not the worst nor the best.”

Zim-card’s submission:

“Quite an interesting yet odd ending, in my own opinion..but nonetheless, I think they did well! But..a bit disappointed AGAIN by the fact that another square wasn’t at least damaged, MORE disappointed it ended off in good terms. The reasons for winning are well put, I have been watching from afar how they had been handling every challenge well— expect for the cooking one. I’d say this is also in between! I’ll..have to think how I’ll rank these..”

Starwlf’s submission:

“As for this one..I LOVE IT! The fact that you managed to actually defeat the player while also giving good reasons! The first time being apart of this to gain some sort of ego boost through this and showing your strength! Wonderful! Very solid reasons, along with skillful moves— other than the fact they did managed to get hurt in the face, but they proved themselves worthy, to me.”

“Well that’s that! Can’t believe nobody else was available during voting… anyways… Here’s the results!”

COMPETITOR VOTE

“And now, here’s the competitor vote, where each of the competitors voted on each other!”

“Here’s what they each have to say!”

starwlf Blixter (told thru starwlf’s perspective):

My point goes to zim’s submission. Blixter enjoys watching a good fight. And man was it delivered. And seeing such a shift to a kinder tone gave him a reminder of his own loved one. A fight against a narrative is all too familiar for him.

Blixer Eclipses:

Probably starwlf (cause in the end zim's gonna win regardless so I figured to like. barely even it out, I dunno)

zim-card Blixter:

“I gotta send a vote to starwlf. I like his determination and confidence, I can understand his stance within this whole challenge as someone new to the ring. I also find it sweet that he's willing to split the prize when he wins... I'd do the same too, honestly. Sure, I'm off put at the successful murder so hm... ah, I can't exactly be the judge of morals when the challenge did ask for a duel. My vote still stands for the fella!”

“So we got 2 votes for starwlf’s Blixter, and a vote for zim’s Blixter! Let’s convert them to points!”

STEP’S EXTRA CREDIT

“Now it’s MY turn to judge!”

“For starwlf’s Blixter, I love the intensity! And actually succeeding in defeating, good job!”

“For Blixer Eclipses, although not much hits were dealt, you put up a good fight with that amazing dodging skills! I also find it pretty funny that he kept dodging the blasts when it’s usually the other way around… heh.”

“For zim-card’s Blixter, the fight was pretty cool! But at the same time you somehow made up with your Cyan and uhhhhhhhh”

“sorry youre going below the others”

“Anyways, let’s get to the points I’m giving out!”

“And the winner of the Battle of the Blixers is……”

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!!!BLIXTER!!!

Total Points:

@zim-card : 30

@jsabaddict : 29

@starwlf : 27

“Congratulations for winning, now here are your prizes!”

“Yeah, I figured that the runner-ups should receive consolation prizes, so me and Pulse just scrambled around the ‘tower’ and found these.”

“Anyways, that’s it!”

“Like I said, it was amazing holding this competition, and I hope me and everyone else had a fun time with it! Now we’re done, so so long! For the last time…

My name is Step, and this has been the Battle of the Blixers! Until then, see you!”

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“So what now?”

“To be honest I have no clue. Probably gonna sleep and also watch these other universes I found. Speaking of, there’s this one cool universe I found, their Barracuda is a snake man who is extreme evil, and last I checked the you and me in it were working together!”

“Okay.”

“Oh, and their Lycanthropy was my brother? I think? Was it blood or found? I don’t remember.”

“Speaking of, I gazed into the Black Room again. I think I saw someone, but it might’ve just been me. Looked a lot like your descriptions of th……..

The two continued their talk, which if I will fill this ending segment with, Tumblr might actually crash lmfao

Anyways, sorry the ending post took so long, i suddenly got a small internship somewhere so it was a bit busy

Other than that, fun contest, yeah? It was really fun hosting it for me!! But if it wasnt fun for any of the competitors, i am genuinely really sorry and i wanna make it up to you if i can

Idk if ill do another contest, but if i will then idk when lol

I have an idea for this tho, maybe a talk-show like thing where step interviews jsab fancharacters?

BotB is gonna be my main au now cuz i gotten extremely attached to the botb gang (which is canonically only step & pulse, but the others are gonna join in if i introduce them in botb lore lol)

Sorry H*I & main au, i dont wanna play with you anymore /ref

Anyways have a good day!!!! Nyazhi out!!!!

[chirpsythismorning]

This got me thinking.

You’ll notice Mike is sitting on the couch, literally in the same spot he was sitting almost a year earlier when Will confided in him for the first time about the mindflayer. Will also asked that Mike not tell the others because they wouldn’t understand.

And here we are again. Nothing's changed.

Except it has.

Now, instead of Will being right beside Mike, with them on the same level both sharing something that is weighing down on them, we have Mike sitting next to Lucas, while Will is sitting higher up above all of them. It’s only now after several signs of the mindflayer, and with everyone present, that Will is deciding to come clean about what he’s been seeing. Not one on one with Mike like before.

Just makes me wonder what Mike could have been thinking at this moment, in this exact spot.

I wonder why Will lied to me about being okay that first time at Day of the Dead? Did he really think it wasn’t a big deal? Or was something else stopping him from opening up to me like he normally would when I asked if he was okay?

Then he’s suddenly thinking about the second time it happened, at the field, which is when he ran off with El. Obviously Will wouldn’t have been able to tell him then. And then the final time at castle Byers after their rain fight… yeah that's when Will finally told them, but look what brought them here?

This also makes the ending of s3 hit a bit harder. 

I guess I’ve been feeling distant from you. Like, you’re pulling away from me or something.

While Mike has his own battle he’s dealing with when it comes to choosing El over Will and the party at times, I think this realization that this played a role in Will distancing himself instead of confiding in Mike like he did before, is such an interesting concept.

I was worrying too much about El and… I don’t know. Maybe I feel like I lost you or something…

It's as if Mike has already outright told us why he latched onto El in the first place and how it directly correlated with why he felt like he lost Will (lost exclusive best friend perks? idk dude is dramatic).

That it was about worry for him when it came to El. Concern. Care.

What he feels for El is deep and meaningful, but it also comes with a dose of obligation and responsibility. Mike feels extremely indebted to El after everything she has does for them. Not only has she had to endure so much because of those around her expecting things from her, but that also includes Mike. His worry for her is fairly warranted.

Mike's attempt in s3 to be as normal as possible, while simultaneously trying to juggle his care for El and his relationship with Will and his other friends... it's just interesting seeing how it plays out and where it all leads to.

In s3, but especially s4, there is this distinction that Mike makes, where he separates Will from their other friends. He also then compares his relationship with El to theirs and how it's negatively impacted them because of his feelings and behavior...

If it was really platonic between him and Will, why in the hell is he making these distinctions at all? Why is he separating Will from the category with his friends and putting him into a category with his gf...?

[ovaryacted]

do you think re4make leon knows how to fuck? 👀

The little eye emoji at the end is making me laugh. But hmm, I've actually thought of this before in-depth, and if I'm gonna be completely honest...probably not. HOLD ON HOLD ON! HEAR ME OUT FIRST DON'T BOO ME OFF THE STAGE!

So in my mind (keyword: my), I don't think Leon would know how to "fuck". He's just not a #realfucker. HOWEVER, that does not mean he is an idiot when it comes to sex and what to do. He just doesn't have enough "experience" that would put him in a category of people who are masters in the bedroom, and that is okay! Frankly, I think it's more realistic and sticks to his loser persona.

I mean, we are dealing with a 27/28-year-old man with immense trauma and survivor's guilt who's been blackmailed into military service and literally thinks about dying frequently. He's in Spain fighting demons both literally and figuratively and has one foot in the grave at all times. No, I don't think he knows how to fuck, he probably hasn't even really done anything that would qualify as "fucking" in a healthy way.

He'd probably have limited chances to actually get involved with anyone, especially if he was being trained to the degree he was. Also, if he was under Krauser's supervision and being trained by him as a means of survival, he doesn't know anything about another human's touch outside of obligation. Not to mention the context of the period he was in the military (close to the early 2000s I think), he probably experienced a fuck ton of homophobia for being a "pretty boy" anyway and that would be a direct jab to his wavering self-confidence.

If anything, he's probably had some quick blowjobs or given them, but actual sex? Nah, his brain can't comprehend doing something like that when he's too busy wondering if he'll live to see another day.

Let us say he was allowed to fuck somebody, I think he would be clueless on where to start or what to do. Sure, Leon is smart and perceptive, he'll be able to adapt eventually, but it won't be a natural process. I made an analysis post about this topic a while ago, about viewing Leon as a sex god when he's the complete opposite in my mind, and I always come back to that because that's how I interpret him.

Does he know where the clit is? Does he know what to do with a dick? Sure, he knows enough about the female and male body to understand what to touch and what goes where. The thing he doesn't know is how to do it in a way that makes both parties feel good, and how it varies from person to person. Has he watched porn or looked through magazines? Probably back when he was a hormonal teenager with nothing better to do, or before he found himself in his current situation, but he doesn't like it. He doesn't see women in particular in the same light as every other form of media views them, so his perception of sex and how it should be done contradicts the norm. Or, he just assumes that he should know what to do, and since he doesn't or can't seem to figure it out, he doesn't bother trying to find out.

He doesn't give me those vibes that he's someone who would know what to do in the bedroom off that bat, and I'm not saying that to be a bummer but that's how I see him at least during this part of his life. But, if you trust him and make him feel comfortable enough by reassuring him as you guide him in the process, he will know how to fuck but primarily know how to fuck you.

Even if I say he doesn't know how to fuck (outside of the regular missionary but he finishes too early so it's embarrassing), he will always be a munch to me. That is his skill in the bedroom, his thing. I always say this but to me, the reason why he doesn't know how to fuck is because he's too damn busy diving headfirst into some pussy so he doesn't care about the whole "fucking" aspect of things. He gets off on getting his partners off, that's just the truth, my truth and I'm sticking to it.

[bluedalahorse]

Sara poll on hobbies and special interests

Inspired by a conversation with @sadhappylady

One of the more tragic things about season 3 for me is the way Sara burns out on her passion for horses. Areas of special interest and/or hyperfixations are something that matters so much to AuDHD people like Sara.

In the first season we see how much Sara lights up around Rousseau, and how special that bond is. By the second season she’s fighting to keep him close by, or at least make sure he goes to a nice family. She melts down when he’s sold. But by season 3… so much of that light is gone, and it makes all the post-s2 grief so much heavier. It’s not just that she’s lost an interest; it feels (to me as a viewer) like a piece of her whole self has been severed away.

I see some post-canon speculation that suggests Sara will get back into working with horses one day—it’s still a job she has in post-canon fics, for instance. For me, personally, these speculations can feel a little surprising and abrupt if not accompanied by some explanation of how Sara finds her way back to horses, and how interacting with horses looks different for her since she left Hillerska. Sometimes these speculations can even feel motivated by a desire to have Sara go back to her “safe” early season 1 self. But Sara has had so much growth and evolution since season 1, and her interests are part of that. Even if she finds her way back to horses post-canon, why would it look exactly the same?

One thing I also wonder about is what hobbies Sara might pursue next, and what kinds of things could potentially become new special interests. We got all of eighteen episodes with Sara during a small slice of her teenage years. But there’s a whole world out there and a whole future ahead of her, and there could be more things she is interested in.

Anyway, I’ve created a poll about future hobbies for Sara.

Regardless of what you pick, feel free to reblog for reach and put your thoughts in the tags. I put pretty broad categories here so I’d love to hear people’s more specific headcanons.

Have a lovely Tuesday!

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

Now that the tour is over, with the way everything on the tour went, what do you think was the reason because of which Kettler resigned? Allegedly, this tour was the last straw. If not, then at the very least he made sure he was not a part of it and made a point to resign just a day or 2 before it started. So I'm wondering what about this particular tour/trip/narrative/PR strategy made Kettler so frustrated that he resigned and went straight to the papers to put his POV forward. (I'm of the opinion that REden knows and did get the scoop directly or indirectly from Kettler himself)

And speaking of the tour, I'm still trying to figure out what they were there to do? What charities were they supporting? What work they did? What partnerships they forged or highlighted? What was the purpose of this? How did they pay for this?

If the VP invited on a whim, what was her intent? It pretty seemed like an influencer gig. Did they get paid, or was this completely sponcered? Since the VP is a govt official I don't think she would have been able to sanction all the expenses plus their appearance fee. Surely that would be a senseless govt expenditure and could count as corruption or personal gain by the VP.

I do get that Meghan is trying to forge a new type of influencer category where she (and her husband) act as important international soughtafter celebs and go to other countries to act like important people. And since she was at the forefront of this whole trip and it's PR campaign, I'm assuming they were marketing it as her work, not his. But what work did she do?

Surely, this kind of a gift is not sustainable on a long term. Where ever will they go next - soudi Arabia? Cayman islands? Afganistan (where Harry can talk about coming home and his nostalgia over his 2 army tours)?

I am getting increasiy bored of these two. They are not giving anything at all - no work. No workethic. no significant projects, even if failed ones. No long term impact. No products. Not even outright merching and brand deals. Their moves are so predictable that people had predicted nearly all of this way back in 2017/18 even before they got married, right up to the faux tours where Meghan would be front and centre.

So, what did this trip achieve? And what about this made Kettler quit?

I didn’t pay attention the trip so I can’t answer much of these questions. The only questions I can answer:

If the VP invited on a whim, what was her intent? Attention. She’s probably making a play for some kind of global role and wanted to leverage the attention the Sussexes brought for her own career or political aspiration.

Where will they go next?

No idea. I think it’ll depend on how they perceive their coverage from the trip. We’ll find out soon, because Meghan can’t help herself from clapping back.

Some options already in the mix is South Korea (for Invictus Games), back to Canada (to promote Vancouver IG 2025), Harry’s month-long trip back to the UK for his birthday, or wherever Soho House needs merching. (Australia Soho House should be opening soon, I think.)

There is gossip that Meghan has big plans for something at the end of October and that’s why they went in August, instead of November. But it’s just gossip.

What about this made Kettler quit?

No idea. But rumor is that he saw something very shady that may or may not have been unethical which may be or may be not related to Colombia, and he noped out of it.

Of course, there’s the official line that Meghan kept interfering in Kettler’s work with Harry and he couldn’t take it. (Who would, really?)

Also for some reason, the papers like to keep pointing out that the lawyers Kettler recently contacted have something to do with employment litigation. That could mean something having to do with Archewell or unethical business practices, but just the same it could also be a red herring and reporters just grasping at straws.

[fortheloveofwonderland]

Midnight | Chapter 15 | S.R

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Chapter Summary - you and Spencer spend time with other people which ends up bringing you closer together. Meanwhile, Garcia makes a discovery.

Pairing - unsub! Spencer Reid / Fem! Reader

Category - dark angst | smut | very eventual happy ending

Warnings - Spencer and reader with other people, oral (m receiving), murder, swearing, penetrative sex, protected sex, angry Spencer, fingering, suicide mentions, mentions of miscarriage, tears.

WC - 4.6k

Chapter 15 - The Haunting

Penelope Garcia looked at the confusing information on her screen with a heavy frown furrowing her forehead. The information wasn’t wrong, she knew that wasn’t possible, but it didn’t mean it made any sense. 

On Sunday JJ had gone to try and see Spencer again and had noted he had mail piling up as though he hadn’t been home for a while. She also couldn’t find his car anywhere. On Monday, armed with the information, Emily had reluctantly agreed to let Garcia put out an APB on Spencer’s missing vehicle. 

It was now Thursday and the team had just arrived back from a case in Chicago. Still frowning at the screen, Penelope printed the information before hurrying out of her bat cave and down the corridor to where everyone had just returned to the bullpen. 

Emily noticed the confusion on the tech analyst's face immediately and frowned as the colourful woman headed her way in too high heels.

“Please don’t tell me we have another one?” Emily groaned, the rest of the team now looking at her. 

“Uh not exactly. I, uh, I think I found boy wonder’s car.” She thrust the printout at Emily who took it and scrutinised it.

“What? Where?” JJ was quickly at her side. 

“You found his car, but not him?” Tara frowned. 

Emily sighed as she looked at the crime scene photographs of an entirely burnt out car surrounded by woodlands. Scanning the notes from the crime scene techs they had discerned the car had once been a canary yellow 1965 Volvo 122S Amazon. The exact same car Spencer drove. 

“Where was this?” Emily looked up at Garcia. 

“In the foothills of the Blue Ridge mountains. It’s been there for at least a week.” Garcia whimpered a little. 

“What is it?” Luke came closer and plucked the sheet of paper from Emily's hand. “Shit.” 

“Someone please share the information.” Rossi encouraged them. 

“A car matching Reid’s was found burnt out in the woods near Franklin County, Virginia.” Emily informed them. 

“Just the car?” JJ’s panic was evident in her voice. 

“Just the car. No one was in it.” Garcia replied. 

“Oh thank god.” JJ breathed. 

“But that begs the question, where is Reid? And why was his car set alight?” Matt scratched the back of his head. 

“And is Y/N with him?” Luke piped up. 

Emily exhaled, looking at the report again before addressing her team. 

“This isn’t an official case,” she regarded each of them individually. “If any of you don’t want to work this, you don’t have to.”

“We’re not going anywhere.” Rossi spoke for them. 

“Agreed.” JJ nodded fiercely. 

“JJ and Rossi will head out to the Franklin County crime lab and take a look at the car. Garcia, have a look and see if there are any rental car companies or used car lots within walking distance of where the car was found. We have to assume he’s ok and he would have needed another way home.” Emily instructed them. 

“But if he’s not ok?” Tara dared to ask. 

“The rest of you start calling local hospitals and see if anyone matching Reid’s description has been admitted in the last week.” 

Everyone nodded in agreement at their assignments and started going their separate ways. Luke felt a pang in a gut, similar to one’s he’d been having since you’d called him from the pay phone in Illinois. Something didn’t feel right and he had a sense that it related to Spencer. He wasn’t sure why, but he was fairly certain if they found him, they would find you too. 

***

Spencer stared at the light fitting hanging above his head, trying not to let himself get too distracted by the halos of light they created on the ceiling. 

His mind wandered over the events of the last week without really meaning to. Since Sunday, when he’d killed Edward Grimes, he’d killed three more times. 

On Monday he drove all the way out to Provo, Utah and murdered Burton Maxwell. On Tuesday he’d gone to Rock Springs, Wyoming and slit the throat of Jeremy Powell. Wednesday had taken him to Flagstaff, Arizona to take care of Harrison Baler. 

In three days he’d clocked well over two and a half thousand miles in the little blue Nissan and despite all the blood he’d shed he didn’t feel satisfied. 

Now it was Thursday and by this point he was exhausted, he couldn’t drive anymore even if he wanted to. Part of the reason he’d kept himself so busy was to limit time spent with you, because he despised the way his heart broke in his chest every time he looked at you. He left early each morning and returned after you were already asleep. 

This morning was the first time you’d seen each other properly since Sunday morning and the air between the two of you was so awkward but he tried to ignore it when you found him in the kitchen. 

“Oh hi stranger. Didn’t expect to see you.” You tugged at the hem of the oversized t-shirt, trying to cover your bare legs. 

“Yeah, sorry I’ve had some business to take care of.” He shrugged, sipping his coffee. 

“Right, of course.” You knew exactly what that meant. 

“I was planning on hanging around today though, if you wanted to grab lunch somewhere or I could try that cooking thing again?” He shrugged, a feeble attempt at extending an olive branch. 

“Uh, I can’t, sorry.” You moved past him toward the coffee machine. 

“Have you not spent every waking minute with GI Mountain Man this week?” He tried to remain calm. 

“Actually no, I haven’t done much of anything this week. Reading mostly. But then I finished my book so I went into town yesterday to buy some new ones and I bumped into Jesse and he asked if I wanted to spend the day with him.” You grabbed a mug and placed it under the spout of the machine. 

“So I’m just old fucking news now right?” He grumbled. 

“Spencer,” you spun back to face him with a frown. “I haven’t seen you for three days! You disappear on your vigilante mission without so much as a word and now you expect me to drop everything because you suddenly want to spend time with me?” 

“Do what you want. I don’t care.” He spat, leaving a half finished cup of coffee on the counter and storming away. 

He hadn’t seen you again after that and at some point he heard you leave the house. He spent a few hours pottering around the cabin but eventually he started to go a little stir crazy and took a walk into town. 

He told himself he didn’t mean to go to Scout’s and scope out the checkouts but that was where he ended up. And low and behold he quickly spotted that head of fire engine red hair. 

He and Mary got talking and he found out she got off work at six and before he’d known it he’d invited her over. 

The noise echoed around the room, the slightly sloppy sounds of saliva and desperation. It had been some twenty minutes now and Spencer didn’t think he’d ever enjoyed a blow job less in his entire life.  

He wasn’t even fully hard anymore, unable to maintain an erection due to the inexperienced mouth around his cock. She was trying, she was trying her best and he felt bad. But she just wasn’t very good. 

Mary kept glancing up at him, questioning with her eyes what was wrong. Eventually Spencer threaded his fingers into her hair and tugged her off of him. A trail of spit led from her chin to the head of his cock and she wiped the back of her hand over her mouth. 

“Am I doing something wrong?” She pouted, kneeling between his legs on the floor. 

“I’m just not feeling it, I guess.” He offered her a smile, taking hold of her wrist and pulling her up until she was in his lap. 

His large hand clutched the back of her neck and brought her closer to kiss her. His tongue roughly thrust inside of her mouth and she gasped into the kiss. 

He started rolling his hips up between her legs, the friction working well to get him standing to attention again in no time. She wore a painfully short skirt despite the temperatures outside and he used his free hand to move her panties aside. 

His cock nestled between her legs, already lining himself up when she suddenly pulled back from his lips. 

“Hang on, one sec,” she blushed slightly, sliding off his lap and scurrying to her bag.

He knew what she was getting and he tried to not roll his eyes. She was being cautious, he kind of admired that about her. But Spencer was really not a fan of condoms. 

She was soon coming back with the little purple packet and kneeling in his lap again. She fumbled in trying to tear it open, a pink hue on her cheeks as she fought with the packaging. 

He was losing wood again, and he rolled his eyes, snatching it from her hands and making quick work of ripping it open. He had to pump his cock a few times before he could slip the condom on. He looked at Mary in his lap, her large green eyes full of embarrassment. 

I can’t fucking look at you, he thought as he lifted her from his lap again and got her to her feet. She frowned as he led her to the side of the couch and bent her over the arm of it, burying her head in the sofa cushion. 

He parted her legs and ran one finger through her folds to make sure she was wet enough for him not to hurt her too much. Pleased she was lubricated enough he lined himself up and soon plunged inside of her. 

Mary yelped, jutting forward at the intrusion but he ignored her. He gripped her hips and started thrusting. 

He closed his eyes and tried to imagine it was you but she felt nothing like you. He pictured your face, your smile, your beautiful eyes. He envisioned your perfect breasts, your goddamn delirious pussy. 

But then he started to visualise your phenomenal body, as you climbed into the bed of another man. He pictured that bearded mountain man between your legs, eating you out, fingering you and then fucking you. 

His thrusts were getting rampant and he ignored Mary’s grunts of pain, lost in his own thoughts. His blunt nails dug into her hips as she squirmed beneath him. 

What the fuck has he got that I haven’t got? He’d never be able to fuck her the way I do, make her feel the way I do. He’s not better than me, he’s a fucking meat head mountain asshole. No, she’s mine, she’ll always be mine. 

“Andrew!” A strangled voice pierced his ears, cutting through his violent thoughts. 

He froze and looked down at Mary who had twisted her neck to look at him. Then his eyes cast downwards between their bodies where his completely flaccid cock, sheathed pathetically in the wrinkled condom, had slid out from between her legs. 

He took a step backwards, feeling more exposed than he’d ever felt in his life. He angrily removed the condom and tossed it on the floor, tucking himself back inside his jeans and flopping to the couch. 

Mary tugged down her skirt before coming to sit next to him. He wouldn’t look at her, he was too embarrassed.

“It’s ok,” she cooed. “It happens.” 

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” He grunted. 

“A little.” She shrugged sadly. 

“Well it doesn’t. Maybe if you were a better fuck, I wouldn’t have this problem.” He spat harshly. 

Mary seemed to withdraw into herself at his words, her bottom lip pouting as he landed that blow to her ego. 

“I’ve never had any complaints before.” She huffed, getting to her feet. 

“That’s because the men you usually spread your legs for are young and inexperienced and wouldn’t know a good pussy if it was literally sitting on their cock.” He growled. 

“Or maybe,” she spun back around, eyes wider than normal. “You can’t keep it up because you’re a goddamn old man!” 

Spencer saw red and it had nothing to do with her flamboyant hair colour. He jumped to his feet and advanced on her, causing her to whimper as he backed her into the door. 

“What did you say?” He spat at her. 

“N-nothing.” She swallowed, her previous bravado vanished into thin air. “I’m sorry.” 

“Get out of my house.” He snarled, taking a step back before he did something stupid. “Now.” 

Mary whimpered again, quickly grabbing up her things and scurrying to the door like a frightened puppy. He watched her go and when she closed the door behind herself he fell back to the couch. 

He was instantly flooded with remorse. None of this was Mary’s fault, he was the only one to blame. He’d pushed you into the arms of another man and now he had to suffer the consequences. 

Mary was simply collateral damage in hurricane Spencer Reid’s path. 

***

You’d spent the day with Jesse, walking in the sunshine, pursuing bookstores and drinking an ample amount of coffee in boutique cafes. He’d taken you to dinner and then you’d ended up back at his place. 

The door was barely closed behind you before he was pushing you back against it and kissing you passionately. Whatever nerves he’d had the other day were well and truly gone now and that was confirmed when his hand slipped inside your pants soon after. 

He plunged two fingers inside of you while his thumb rubbed your clit. You moaned against his lips, pushing your back up against the door. He was clearly not wasting any time and you were more than happy with that. 

His lips trailed down your neck as he fingered you and you found the bulge in his pants and started stroking him through the fabric. He hissed into your skin, bucking against your hand. 

“Fuck, I, uh,” he swallowed thickly. “It’s been a really long time, maybe we can just focus on you for now.” 

You giggled, removing your hand from his erection and letting the feeling of his fingers inside of you wash over you. 

You were clenching around his hand, your legs turning to jelly beneath you. You gripped his jaw and kissed him again. 

“Should we take this away from the front door?” You panted. 

“Uh huh, good idea.” He somewhat reluctantly removed his hand from inside your pants and then grasped your wrist, pulling you along to his bedroom. 

You fell to the bed and your lips attached again. You helped each other out of your clothes until you were both completely naked. He rolled on top of you, fingers finding their way back between your legs. You looked him up and down and moaned slightly at the sight of him. 

Almost every inch of skin on both arms from wrist to shoulder were covered in intricate and colourful tattoos. One continued over and down his chest, stopping just shy of his left nipple. You ran your nails along his ribs where another large tattoo was on display. 

“You like them?” He smirked down at you, his fingers working deftly inside you. 

“Hmm.” You hummed. “Very sexy.” 

He chuckled and bowed his head to kiss you again. You felt his hard cock press against your leg and you were suddenly desperate for him. 

“Jesse?” You panted into his mouth. 

“Yes, Rose?” 

“Please fuck me.” You whined, opening your legs and trying to nestle him between them despite the fact his hand was still there. 

He laughed again, continuing to finger you for a few more seconds before he cautiously withdrew his fingers. He knelt over you and reached for the night stand, fishing out a condom. You chewed on your bottom lip as you stared at his hard abs and even harder cock as he ripped open the packet. But he seemed to grow a little hesitant as he rolled it on, hands shaking slightly.

“Fuck, sorry. I’m nervous. Is that weird?” He pulled a face. 

“Not at all.” You tried to reassure him. 

“I’m really sorry if I don’t last very long.” He positioned himself between your legs and you ran your fingers through his thick beard. 

“Jesse, please just fuck me.” You laughed, wrapping your legs around his waist. 

He laughed too, kissing you once more as he slowly edged inside of you. He wasn’t as big as Spencer but despite thinking he would be rusty, he certainly knew what he was doing. 

He didn’t last all that long but it was ok because he still managed to make you come before he himself was pushed over the edge. 

Afterwards you laid side by side in his bed in a mildly awkward silence. You had a feeling he wanted to say something and so you stayed quiet until he found his voice. 

“So, uh,” he rolled his head to the side to look at you. “I was married once.” 

“Oh.” You replied, not entirely sure what to say to that. 

“I met a girl in my freshman year of college and we just fell so fast for each other. We got married when we were twenty one, she fell pregnant two months later. She miscarried really late into the pregnancy and she was never the same again. Her mental health declined day by day, she could barely leave the apartment to go to work. We tried medications and therapists and for a while it seemed to help.

I wanted to try for another baby but she didn’t. No matter how much time passed she wasn’t interested. Our marriage struggled, I really wanted kids. I’m pretty sure we were heading for divorce. We’d been married for seven years when I returned home from work one day and found her in the bathtub with her wrists cut. I can still picture it sometimes, the blood, the lifeless eyes. It haunts me.” 

Your chest tightened to the point it was painful as you looked into the eyes of this wonderful man as he told you about his dead wife. He’d told you his relationship history was complicated but you’d not expected that. 

“Jesus,” you breathed. “That’s horrible, I’m so sorry.” 

“It was a long time ago.” He shrugged. “I didn’t date for a really long time after that, not until I moved back to Butte. I met a woman who ran the Tin Cup Cafe in town and we hit it off. We dated for about a year until she told me one day that it bummed her out that I sometimes said my dead wife’s name in my sleep. She left town after that, I never saw her again.” 

“Shit.” You reached for him, cupping his cheek softly in your hand. “When you said complicated I didn’t think you meant this complicated.” 

“And to top it all off, now I’m falling for a married woman.” He sighed wistfully. 

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” 

“I wish I had a choice.” 

“Should I go?” You let your hand fall back to your side. 

“I don’t know. I don’t want you to, but if you stay it might make it harder.” He smiled sadly. 

“I like you, Jesse, I really do.” You confessed. “But I have no idea how long I’ll even be in Crested Butte for and there is still the matter of Sp…Andrew.” You mentally scalded yourself. 

“If it’s just a marriage of convenience, why do you stay with him?”

“It’s…complicated. For lack of a better term.” 

“I just told you about my wife’s suicide, I can handle complicated.” He took hold of your hand encouragingly. 

“He’s my best friend.” You sighed, trying to pick your words carefully. “Something happened and we had to leave our jobs, our homes. We’re not really married.” 

God Spencer would actually kill you if he knew you were telling anyone this. 

“What do you mean?” Jesse frowned. 

“We wear the rings, we say we’re married. But we’re not. It’s just easier somehow.” 

He let go of your hand and looked at you curiously, cogs turning in his head. 

“Are you like, in WITSEC or something?” 

“Not quite that dramatic, but in a sense, I guess.” 

“Is your name really Rose?” His eyebrows furrowed.

“No.” 

“Can you tell me your real name?” 

“No.” 

“So I’m here falling for a woman who I thought was married, but really isn’t and I don’t even know your real name?” He looked at you in exasperation and god how you wished you’d kept your mouth shut. “Fuck, how is that somehow more complicated than my dead wife?”

“I’m sorry.” You rolled your lip between your teeth. “Maybe we shouldn’t have…this was a bad idea.”

He watched you roll over and scrabble to your feet, quickly trying to locate your clothes. 

“You don’t have to go.” He spoke but he didn’t sound so sure. 

“It’s best that I do.” You dressed hurriedly as he observed from the bed. “Please don’t tell anyone. Especially Sp…fuck…Andrew. Please.” 

It made sense to him now why you always tripped over his name, you were hiding his real identity. But he hadn’t missed the look of fear in your eyes when you spoke about him. 

“Is he threatening you? Does he hurt you?” He sat up, sounding panicked. 

“What? No.” You were quick to answer. 

“You said he was a bully.” 

“He has a bit of a temper, but he’s not abusive or anything like that. Look, just forget I said anything, please? I really need you to drop this.” 

He looked like he might argue but eventually he sighed and chewed on the inside of his cheek.

“Can I walk you home?” 

“No, I’m fine, thanks though.” You finished getting your clothes back on and slid your feet in your shoes. 

He got up and gave you a kiss goodbye, but his eyes looked sad when he pulled away, stroking back your hair. 

“This is over before it really began, isn’t it?” He whispered. 

“I think it has to be. I can’t tell you who I am or where I’ve been, or even where I’m going. I’m sorry, I really am. But you deserve better than that.” You smiled sadly at him. 

“Friends?” He smiled back. 

“For sure.” You nodded, stepping backwards towards the door. “I’ll see you around.”

“I hope so.” He watched you slip from the room and listened to the sound of the front door opening and closing. 

You hurried home, finding the cabin shrouded in darkness and thinking Spencer must have gone out, with Mary or to kill you weren’t sure. 

You found the used condom discarded on the living room floor and rolled your eyes, knowing you couldn’t be hurt after what you’d spent your night doing. You left it there, it was his mess and he could clean it up. 

You headed upstairs, ready to collapse and sleep for a week but as you trudged down the landing you noticed a small sliver of light emanating from under the bedroom door. Tentatively you pushed the door open, worried about what you might find. It was one thing to know he’d slept with someone else, another entirely to have to witness it. 

But upon entering the bedroom, you found Spencer alone, curled up in a foetal position in the middle of the bed, still fully dressed. He hugged his legs to his chest and his face was buried into his knees. 

The lamp on the nightstand illuminated his face and when he glanced up your heart constricted in your chest when you saw the tear stains on his cheeks. He sniffed and rolled his bottom lip between his teeth. 

Wordlessly you kicked off your shoes and shucked off your jacket before padding over to the bed and dropping to the mattress. He straightened his legs and held his arms out which you curled into without hesitation. 

He pulled you close, holding you tighter than you’d ever been held before. He buried his face into the crook of your neck and you could feel his scratchy stubble against your skin. 

“Please never leave me.” He whimpered, his voice completely shattered. “I’m an ass, I’ve been so terrible to you. I don’t deserve you. But please don’t ever leave me.” 

“Spencer,” you wrapped your arms around him as your own tears appeared out of nowhere and started cascading from your eyes. “I couldn’t leave you, even if I wanted to. Partners in crime, right?” 

“Partners in crime.” He sobbed, holding you impossibly tighter. “He’ll never love you like I do, you know that right?” 

“I know, Spence, I know.” You nodded, burying your head into his chest. 

This was how you’d both eventually fall asleep, sobbing into each other's embrace. But something felt different, something had shifted but you couldn’t quite put your finger on what.

Perhaps it was an understanding that passed between you. You’d been fighting each other this whole time, pushing each other away as though that somehow might make this whole situation easier. If you weren’t so in love with one another, life would be so much simpler. 

But falling for Spencer had happened without rhyme or reason and even if he never planned on catching you and you fell flat on your face, you would love him regardless. 

Maybe he was right, Jesse never would love you like he did, maybe no one ever would. Certainly no one would understand the things you were capable of the way Spencer did. And that was both calming and haunting all at once. 

"Come on in, boy" said the skeletons,

Sitting by her closet door.

Dirty secrets, empty memories,

And broken hearts across the floor.

I was knocked out, heels over head,

So you dragged me by my feet,

To a ghost town, where you buried me,

No wonder no one heard my screams.

Love's so alive, but it died in it's sleep,

And now that it's dead,

I live in your head,

And I will haunt your fucking dreams.

No one will love you like I did,

Will treat you like I did,

So go on, wear that scarlet letter.

No one will love you like I did,

Will touch you like I did,

So good luck finding something better.

Run away, boy, if you couldn't tell,

Baby's got a thirst for blood.

A subtle system, wicked melodies,

Craving bullets from her gun.

So I tripped, stayed, follow every word,

Little spirals in their eyes.

Catch a lover, turn an enemy,

Just to watch them burn alive.

No one will love you like I did,

Will treat you like I did,

So go on, wear that scarlet letter.

No one will love you like I did,

Will touch you like I did,

So good luck finding something better.

Someday you may find that picture perfect guy,

And I'll chase my words with poison.

Until that day arrives, and swine take to the sky,

Fill your void with open thighs so.

No one will love you like I did,

Will treat you like I did,

So go on, wear that scarlet letter.

No one will love you like I did,

Will touch you like I did,

So good luck finding something better.

No one will love you like I did,

Will treat you like I did,

So go on, wear that scarlet letter.

No one will love you like I did,

Will fuck you like I did,

So good luck finding something better.

@bubblebuttwade @jay-2s-world @daddy-dotcom

[luciferanalyzestar]

I love dark humor but HH is very lacking about expect the pilot for example the jolke about angel insults vaggie who asks if he is trying to be rasist oe sexist and he tells which make her more mad. Only joke I like in series it is when nifty told about how she torture insects and nobody catch her because they are too afraid.

The comparation between hh heaven and P&S one is beacuse the main character act rude and sinful but big point they are been kicked out ! Heaven don't approve but in same time there is episode where a demon ascend , so P&S heaven is good place.

The funny thing i don't consider HH!heaven corropt sure they made extemination, in secret so we don't know what all population thinking about, and without extremination sinners would be dangerous because Hell is just amusement park for evil, imp company make their money killing humans by commision from sinners, if they could they do themselcves. Hell is full of worst , for examople when vaggie was suppost to be protitue for me, that heaven was corropt because prostitue should be hold accontoble like pimp, serial killer, gangster

I like dark / general fuck up humor too. For example, the life lesson parody channel Tomorrow's Teachings. That channel has made me laugh out of loud so many times due to how absurd the plots are. I do not like every joke made in those videos though and they can cross into tasteless or too fucked up if you know about that channel's history.

For a show set in Hell, Hazbin is lacking in the dark humor category. The only joke that got a giggle out of me was in episode one when Niffty freezes up when the camera is on her and I like how it comes back at the end of episode eight. I like to me a good call back.

This show never made me laugh. I found those Gen Alpha parody songs that were made when the show was released to be funny. So many of them live in my head rent free. Also, I have watched this voice over parody more than the actual show. Makes me laugh every time, it is so stupid. /lh

Back on topic, I wish the show had more character-based humor and maybe dry/deadpan humor. There are many forms of humor. Focusing on just on one type can make your show dull.

The funny thing i don't consider HH!heaven corropt sure they made extemination, in secret so we don't know what all population thinking about, and without extremination sinners would be dangerous

I wonder what the reaction would be if the exterminations are revealed to Winners. Will they be against it, for it, or neutral. This is probably will be explore when Molly [Angel's twin sister] gets introduce. Like would she care that there is a chance that her brothers and father will be killed by angels? It is also a headscratcher that she is in Heaven. She is a spider like the rest of her family, meaning she had a part in crimes her father or brothers committed. We just have to put a pin in that until Season 2.

Hell is full of worst , for examople when vaggie was suppost to be protitue for me, that heaven was corropt because prostitue should be hold accontoble like pimp, serial killer, gangster.

I think I mentioned before, I think in my Charlie blog post, but I wish Hell and Heaven had clear set rules on what gets you set to those places. The unfortunate implications of that being a sex worker gets you sent to Hell is horrible. I hope when we see more of Heaven it is revealed that sex work exists in Heaven like in the form of OF models.

[tmntxthings]

∑一 Do You Realize?・゜・。

author’s notes: idk what to say & also idk what i wrote, i was floating during this XD but we post anyhow

warnings: fluff, slice of life, flirt, cursing? unedited asf, suggestive perhaps??? if you squint?? or maybe like peanut butter a lot???

song: “ Do You Realize?? by The Flaming Lips ”

—————————————————————————

Michelangelo was quiet as he ate his peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Though it was more peanut butter than jelly. Which really may have been even more disturbing than the silence. Who in their right mind liked the way it got stuck in the roof of their mouth?

“…”

You munched on your own sandwich. A proportionate amount of pb and j on either bread slice. After swallowing you decided to speak up.

“What?”

His response was immediate after a blink or two.

“I didn’t say anything!”

“Yeah but I know you’ve got something to say,”

He goes back to that odd quietness again. His fingers squeezing onto the sandwich too tightly. Peanut butter getting all over his hands. Well. Even more so than before. Truthfully he had been sticking his fingers in the jar to eat it raw earlier.

“…it’s weird.”

A teasing tone came from your voice as you nudged your shoulder with his.

“Can’t be weirder than eating peanut butter with your fingers.”

“Hey!” An offended lilt heard from Mikey. But it couldn’t be helped!

“Just kidding..” “Mostly..” You offered as a compromise. His head tilted from side to side, seeming to let it go in favor of the initial conversation.

“Well, I was just thinking about how we’re all gonna die one day.” Now you hadn’t been expecting that. Not at all. Mikey had his weird quips. But this was darker than most! You wondered if his favorite pizza place had been demolished again offhandedly before saying the first word that came to your mind.

“Oh?” But it didn’t stop there!

“And that, I’d just hope you’d be around when it happens for me.”

Now that was just too much. It was sad. It was sweet. It was all wrapped up in emotions that had you looking Mikey in the eyes, pb fingers and all and giving him a small smile.

“Damn..” Again you were at a lack of words here. You wished you could say more. In fact you should’ve just said, ‘same’ or ‘me too Mikey’ or anything other than something so meaningless.

“Yeah, weird right?” He didn’t seem put off by your lack of response. His eyes had met yours, returning the smile before looking back down at his food. Taking another bite.

“A little, but not the strangest thing ever.” Which was true. You had to endure Leo after all. And he said random shit all the time. Though not as philosophical. Maybe Donnie would be closer to this category.

“Also!” Mikey spoke up around his bite.

“Oh there’s more?” You pop the last bite into your mouth. Dusting off the crumbs on your fingers on the paper plate below. Reaching for the bottle of water that had sat untouched since the two of you had sat down for the midnight snack.

“Yeah! I was also thinking about how life goes by super fast, and all the good moments too, it’s the bad ones that tend to drag out. I just wonder why that is.” This was longer, and even more confusing than the first.

“Hmm” Your eyebrows went together, thinking of what to say. Holding off for longer than before. But your mind was still blank. The thoughts weren’t weird, in fact you felt they were true. But..“I couldn’t even begin to try and pretend that I know the answer,”

“Yeah,” Mikey sighed in agreement. It was something he couldn’t answer too.

“And another thing!”

It seemed Mikey was on a roll tonight. You propped your elbow up on the table. Letting your hand cup your cheek as you leaned into it. Pushing the paper plate away from underneath you. “Mhm?” You listened intently. Well you thought you had been. Because you got some words but not the others as you watched his eyes rather than his lips.

You caught words like, “face” “happiness” “realize” It all didn’t really make much sense. But his eyes, the way they lighted up as you paid attention. It was so endearing. Unlike the rest of him that was green and orange, and okay he had splashes of other colors with his stickers too. But his eyes. They held a mixture of such a striking red and a mellow amber. It was far from anything you had ever seen, much like the turtle himself. Entrancing.

“You didn’t hear a word I just said did you?” He mused. And you were caught red handed as you sheepishly tried to play it off, listing the words you did catch with a bit of embarrassment. “Well that just won’t do, listen close okay?” Mikey said and his hands went up as if to cup your face, but he still had peanut butter covering them so instead you held onto his wrists, nodding in confirmation.

“Do you realize that you have the most beautiful smile? The one when you’re especially happy?” You squeezed his wrists, giving him a rueful expression. Was he being serious? Of course he was! He was smiling at your bashfulness, but nothing in his stare said he was playing you. “Thanks for enlightening me,” you say, though the blush can’t be helped.

“Your welcome!” And he had the audacity to wink as he took one peanut butter covered finger and stuck it in his mouth. You blinked. How could he go from borderline flirting to— to?!? Whatever he was doing now??? Eating obliviously?? It was times like these where you wondered. The lower half of your face hidden behind a hand pressed against your mouth. Trying to cover that embarrassingly bright blush. You wondered if Mikey actually did know what he was doing, and he was just a damn good actor at pretending not to know.

As you recomposed yourself, lost in thoughts like those. You didn’t pay any mind to Mikey turning slightly to the side and winking at no one in particular.

Yeah he knew. And yeah he does it on purpose.

;D

—————————————————————————

[cariantha]

A Chance Encounter (3/3)

Book: Open Heart (Pre-Series) Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Sawyer Brooks) Rating: Teen Category: Fluff Word count: 1.3K Series Summary: Ten years before meeting at Edenbrook, Ethan and Sawyer have a chance encounter during spring break.

Chapter Summary: Almost two years after moving to Boston and meeting Ethan Ramsey, Sawyer realizes her spring break dream guy and current boyfriend are the same person.

Part One | Part Two

Part Three: The Realization 

March 2024 - Boston, Massachusetts

“Okay, okay! Truce!” Sawyer surrendered with breathless laughter. She and Ethan, and most of the surfaces in the room, were dripping wet in the aftermath of their impromptu water fight at the kitchen sink.

Ethan playfully swatted her bottom with a dish towel before he started mopping up the countertop. “Hey!” she jumped with a laugh. “You started it, mister.”

“Uh-uh. You did when you gagged at my recipe idea.”

“Sorry, not sorry. But it was a terrible idea. Who puts raisins in pasta? Who puts raisins in anything? Gross,” she shivered in disgust. Changing the subject, “Hey, speaking of terrible things… did you hear about all those spring breakers who ended up in the E.R. last night?”

“I did. I saw it on the news as well. It’s a miracle no one drowned. Fifty people crammed onto a pontoon boat… what a bunch of drunken idiots,” Ethan commented and shook his head.

“So, I take it you never did anything crazy or reckless on your spring breaks?” She stopped what she was doing and turned to face him. “Did you even go on any spring break trips?”

“Once.” 

Nearly a year and a half since meeting in the lobby of Edenbook, Sawyer still hadn’t remembered their encounter over a decade ago. And Ethan didn’t want to tell her. He wanted her to realize on her own and was still hopeful she would. Something would eventually jog her memory and he wanted to witness the moment she finally connected the dots. The more senior doctor had always been fascinated with how his protege’s mind worked, how an everyday random thought became the key to unlocking a medical mystery. He wondered if it would be like that when she finally remembered. But then again, Sawyer didn’t even know there was a mystery to be solved, so maybe not. 

“Once what?” Sawyer asked, walking to the dining table to collect the wine glasses, “Once you were reckless or once–” She cut herself off as her foot slipped out from under her. “Whoa!” she yelped, clipping her elbow on a metal cabinet handle as she fell on her rump. “Owww,” she whimpered, cradling her throbbing funny bone. 

“Shit! Are you okay?” Ethan rushed to her side and crouched down. He peeled Sawyer’s hand away from her elbow and saw red. “Come here.” Scooping her into his arms, he stood and gently deposited her on top of the kitchen island. Reaching for a roll of paper towels, he tore a couple off. “Here, keep pressure on it. I’ll be right back.” A minute later he returned with a first aid kit. 

Needing a distraction from the throbbing pain, Sawyer watched him sort through the kit. “Tell me more about your spring break. I can’t quite picture you partying on the beach in Florida. Isn’t that where all the east coasters go?” 

“It was during med school,” he answered. “Tobias’ stepdad had a house at the beach, right on the water. We spent a few days there with a couple of other buddies from school. It wasn’t anything wild like the scene in Florida… pretty upscale… but Tobias did throw a big party while we were there.” Having gathered the needed supplies, he lifted the paper towels and examined the gash on her elbow. “What about you? Let me guess… Mexico? Lake Havasu? Vegas?”

She shook her head as she also assessed her injury. “I was on scholarship. I couldn’t afford to go anywhere. But sophomore year, my roommate invited me to go with her to New York. She was a nanny for a super-rich family from L.A. They let her bring a friend since she was giving up her spring break to travel with them.” 

Standing between her legs, Ethan cleaned the wound. When Sawyer turned her head and flinched from the sting of the antiseptic, he leaned down and blew on her elbow. 

Sawyer snapped her head back to him. When he lifted his eyes to meet hers, memories of her time in the Hamptons with a handsome young stranger came rushing back. The stranger who traveled with three friends and whose roommate had a wealthy stepfather who owned a house on the water. A medical student at John Hopkins. A coffee snob with eyes the same color as the ocean.

“You– You didn’t say where you went for spring break,” she commented quietly.

Ethan stepped away to dispose of the bloody gauze and paper towels. His back was to her when he answered. “The Hamptons.”

When he turned around, he saw the realization dawning in her glassy eyes. 

Sawyer stared back at him for a moment. "Moondoggie?" she asked softly, her throat suddenly tight as she swallowed her choked-up tears.

Ethan smiled as he returned to the counter and rummaged through the first aid kit for the right size bandage. 

“You’re… it was… it was you?" she stammered, putting the puzzle pieces together. As he applied ointment to her wound, her mind wandered to the countless times he had lovingly kissed and caressed the barely there scar on her thigh. "Why haven't you ever said anything?" 

"It was complicated. You were an intern. I was an attending. Cracking that door open would have made it even harder to keep things professional.” 

"When exactly did you realize?" she wondered. 

"In the waiting room of the E.R. The moment I saw and called you over to help,” he admitted, tearing the wrapping away from the bandaid. 

“But you acted like you didn’t know me.” 

“I recognized you immediately. How could I ever forget these bewitching green eyes?” he said, his knuckles caressing her cheek. “I just didn’t know your name.”  

She held her tongue as he concentrated on placing the butterfly bandage just right. When he was done, Sawyer slugged him. 

“Ow! What was that for?” he moaned, rubbing his shoulder.

“We met. We had this incredible connection. Had a magical night together. And thennn, we meet again ten years later, unable to resist each other, and you still don’t believe in soulmates?!” 

Ethan shrugged. “You know I believe in science, not star charts. There’s a perfectly logical explanation–”

Sawyer shook her head and cut him off before he bored her to death with scientific reasoning. “Ethan… I can’t believe this… you were my… my–”

“Spring break hook-up?” he tried to finish for her.

“No… well yes, but you were my– my first.” 

He stopped what he was doing and looked her in the eyes. “Are you serious?” 

“Yeah.”

“Well, clearly it was not very memorable,” he poked fun at himself as he started to move away and clean up.

Sawyer quickly grabbed his shirt and tugged him back. “Are you kidding?! I’ve never forgotten that night, Ethan. I never forgot how you made me feel,” she told him, wrapping her hands around his wrists to keep him close. “You know, the first time I saw a picture of you, I thought you looked like him. The guy I met on spring break. It was always at the back of my mind, but I figured it was just wishful thinking...” She trailed off, stroking his cheek with her thumb. “It's probably why I didn't recognize you as my medical hero when we saved that woman's life. Seeing you again short-circuited my brain," she chuckled. Locking eyes with him, her tone became more serious. "That guy from the beach was my dream guy. I’ve never forgotten him and I compared everyone who came after to him.”

“Is that so?” he asked in a near whisper, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

“Yes.” Sawyer shrugged her shoulders. “I’m sorry I didn’t remember right away. I suppose once I started to get to know you… once I found the real thing… I didn’t need to hold onto the memory of the dream guy anymore.” She locked her legs around his waist and her arms around his torso, drawing him as close as possible.  

“I see,” he said, planting a soft kiss on her lips. “Well, maybe if I play my cards right, I can be your first and your last.”

“Take me to the bedroom, Moondoggie,” she smiled. “You can be my first, last, and right now.”

Tag List: @choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics @peonierose @potionsprefect @trappedinfanfiction @jerzwriter @queencarb @coffeeheartaddict2 @quixoticdreamer16 @jamespotterthefirst @liaromancewriter @zealouscanonindeer @tveitertotwrites @tessa-liam @youlookappropriate @kyra75 @socalwriterbee @txemrn @midnightmelodiz

[sunshinegirl29]

Postcards - Chapter 1.

Hi! This fic has been pottering around in my brain for months, I've planned and unplanned and written and deleted, but here it is!

It's my first dabble into writing so constructive criticism and such really welcomed. I'm also open to requests if you like my writing. I write for Spencer Reid, Eddie Munson and Joel Miller.

It's Spencer x Reader, 18+ eventually, slow burn - eventual warnings for abuse, SA and general criminal minds related triggers. updates will be bi monthly.

Chapter 1 – Growing Pains.

You study the form while you wait, leg bouncing against the sticky underside of the table.  No matter the outcome, this has to be over.  The shaking letter is factual and to the point.  A long sigh. You place the envelope back on the desk, before reaching over the files to roll the rich blue fountain pen between your fingers. 

A door clicks, finally.  The familiar heavy tread of Sherrif Miller; “Hello again” he huffs, clutches the ridged back of his office chair and sits down.  You notice his metal foot drags more these days, after all this time he’s never told you how it happened and you don’t ask.  You don’t look up from the broken skin on the corner of your fingers, though you know he’ll be wearing the same sullen frown, his exasperation unhidden. You wonder if he thinks you’re making it up.

“My statement. Is that all you need?” You sigh, looking him in the eye. He shifts uncomfortably under your gaze, blanching slightly.  He doesn’t respect you, typical older generation male, feels out of control in his life and within his team so he dismisses you.  A smile tugs at the corner of your mouth and Miller stands, leg creaking as he rises quicker than you thought he would at his age.

“Yes, that’s all. I’ll leave it with the rest—” You were going to protest, for the third time this month but it falls flat with the rest of Millers’ sentence.

“Hi there, I’m sad we have to meet again under these circumstances.”  You step from foot to foot, wiping both hands on your jeans.  Mason Cook is classically handsome, dark hair and light eyes; he’s the type of man who’s charming, but brooding at the same time.  From the amount of time you’ve spent at this station, you’ve seen plenty of his female colleagues fall over themselves to impress him, frankly it’s quite embarrassing but you can see the appeal.

“It’s okay Mason, Miller here was just telling me how you’re all going to put your time and resources into finding this weirdo. Right Miller?” 

You hear the scrawling of Miller’s pen stop, you definitely hit a nerve.  Mason watches as usual, he knows you’re enjoying bating his useless boss and wipes a large hand over his beard to cover his own tilted grin.

“That’s enough.” He snaps, “Cook, don’t you have work to do? We have weirdo to find and you’re my resource.”    You nod.  A subtle glance at your watch; 7:15am, you were late.

_

“Second day on the job and you’re already late?”

SSA Derek Morgan croons when he talks. He can’t help it.  It’s lead plenty of women straight to bed but right now it reminds you that a useless errand to the Sherrif’s office made you late for the most important job you’ve landed in years.

“Bite me Morgan” His laugh fades as you rush past, dipping into the roundtable room.

No one’s here.   This must be what hazing feels like?

You understand men like Morgan, women usually fall into three categories; two separate categories that had their own rules.  The first box was untouchable. These women were untouchable in every sense of the word. They usually either belonged to someone else, or meant something to him.   Garcia fell into that category, you’d deduced – they’d shamelessly flirt and are the only reason BAU’s HR department were in business.  She would always reside in the Untouchable box, regardless of how much Penelope wanted out of that particular category.  Jennifer Jaureu also belonged in that box, but in a different way.  She was Will’s – it started and ended there.  He had eyes of course; she was attractive but he loved her like family.  Then there was Elle.  She had started out in the fuckable box, but getting shot and killing Lee had shifted her into the untouchable box pretty quickly after that.  He’d dated enough women to know to stay away from that kind of trauma, besides he’d loved her like family too.  

Then there’d been you.  After months of training together, you were quite sure you now hovered between the fuckable and untouchable box.  There was something powerfully arousing knowing that the person that had your life in their hands daily, could take it instantly.  If he knew, you’d be banished to the untouchable box instantly.  

Anyway, you let him have his win. 

“You told me it was urgent. You lie!” It spurts out in a laugh, breaking the silence.

“Sorry babydoll! I’m just messin’ with you! Welcome to the team!” he pats you on the back and helps pick up the files and folders that your whirlwind entrance scattered around the small room.

You settle down in a chair opposite the door, a strategic position; able to see for potential threats and a planned exit route for any emergencies. Perfect.   It’s not long before Agent Rossi takes a seat beside you.  He gives a short good morning and a reassuring pat on the shoulder in support of your second real day on the job – it goes a long way in settling simmering nerves.

Morgan sits down, a ghost of a smirk still on his lips as he sips a third cup of steaming coffee.  He tries to hide it but you’re trained to observe, not being able to miss the roving way his eyes study you across the table.  It’s insane how an expert profiler doesn’t realise you see right through it, but maybe, you smirk back, he does and just doesn’t care?  

Garcia totters in, bright and giddy, the breath of fresh air in the stifling room.  She’s passing cups of coffee in ludicrous mugs to each person when JJ and Aaron file in together; their presence hushes the deep conversation you’re having with Rossi, leaving the intricate details of Bobby Fisher’s chess strategy dead in the water.  

“Okay, Good Morning, let’s get started.” He looks determinedly everywhere but you. JJ interrupts your thoughts with a manilla folder. 

“Three girls have gone missing and been later found murdered over the last 6 months in a semi-rural area of Georgia.”  Your heart lurches, desperate to free itself from your chest.  You take a few deep breaths, calming it into submission.   “Alison Sinclar, Cassidy Williams and Joslyn Cooper were all in their late teens to early twenties when they each went missing.”  JJ pauses, allowing Garcia to pull up pictures of each girl in a row. 

“Allison Sinclar a Senior at Georgia High School had Spring Break with her family in Senoia Georgia. She disappeared after leaving a house party at a friend’s and never returned.  She’d been strangled and posed.  She was found on the edge of farmland a few days later.” JJ blanches at the crime scene photos, turning quickly to hand out some physical copies to an empty chair.

 “Oh my! How are you all not in so much therapy?!” Garcia holds a cherry octopus’ mug in her field of vision, shielding from the unnecessarily gruesome death.

“Any evidence of sexual assault?” Emily asks. 

“Yes, extensively.” JJ nods, her voice unwavering.

Allison was someone’s child, but to this killer she had been nothing but a means to an end, a way to get off and dispose in favour of the next prize.  

The board flickered, to Garcia’s irritation and you take the time to observe the rest of the group;

  Emily Prentiss was no longer the new kid on the team, she’d taken you under her wing in the weeks leading up to your first day and you’d taken to texting her a few times a week for late night advice and tips to assimilate.  She’d been helpful but somewhat reserved in giving any personal details about herself; smart girl.  Morgan was debating the Sexual Predator angle with Aaron, who still wasn’t looking at you.  Then there was the case of the strange empty chair.

“There!” Penelope chimes “You can bow to the technical Goddess!” 

“Cassidy Williams.” Hotch cuts her off with the smallest hint of joviality “Cassidy was seventeen, she had been in and out of foster homes, in Georgia.  She was found in a wooded area on the edge of town, also strangled and posed like Allison”    

This one was a carbon copy of the first.  Her body wilted over at the waist, manipulated into a vulgar position.  A strange sensation washed over you, leaving you shivering uncomfortably.

This was enough for Garcia.  She stood abruptly, coffee splashing onto the files in the additional space at the table.  “No. Nope. I’ll be in my bat-cave if you need me.  God, I need my therapist on speed dial!!” 

Aaron nods, giving her arm a small squeeze before she leaves.  He’s never done that to you. It evokes an unpleasant sensation in your gut. 

This time he looks at you it’s short lived, if you weren’t paying attention you’d have missed it.  But he knows better. 

“Joslyn Cooper, twenty-two and the most recent death.  Hers prompted the Georgia Police Department to request our assistance on the case.  She was” JJ takes a visible breath, “Also posed but her heart was removed.” 

“Oh my god.” Whistled Rossi even a seasoned agent like him wasn’t immune to this particular horror. 

A chorus of disgust rippled around the room, it starts a debate about the significance of the heart in mythology and religion but you could only focus on the posing, something about it seemed vaguely familiar.

“Hey Sugar? Are you okay?” Morgan’s wave came into focus and you shake your head involuntarily.  It looked like he was enjoying your distraction, the toothy grin snuck onto his face and you replied in kind.

“Yeah.” You scoff, “It’s a rough one for the first case.” You placate him with the ghost of the truth and run your fingers jokingly over the sparse hair on his head on your way out the door.

A sudden motion stops you.  A flicker of movement that turns into a touch of your arm, it guides you discreetly away from your colleagues who grab go bags with muscle memory.  You’re very familiar with the huffing breath and deep frown of Aaron Hotchner.

“Aaron, don’t do this.” You say slowly and wish this wasn’t going to turn into a passive aggressive lecture.

“They don’t know.” Aaron said and you watch his chin tilt. He looks over you with a serious gaze that sits comfortably on his brow.  The one that Hayley always talked about.

It was horrifying how little they knew.  He was their boss and they knew nothing about him. It felt like a slap in the face, another reminder of how insignificant you were – or maybe it was a classic reflection of how you felt about yourself, deep down. 

“You don’t have to tell me how much they don’t know Aaron.” From your position on a spare desk in a shadowed corner of the Bullpen you scowl up at him, “They didn’t even bat an eyelid, not even Garica who has all your files!?”

Aaron breathes heavily, tongue moistening his cracked lips.  “There’s aspects of my life I want to keep private.”  It’s flat and unemotional, as you expect. “The anonymity will help you here and it keeps you safe.”   You muse for a second, chewing on his words – they’re sour and shame tinged but the faint sweetness of comfort lingers on your tongue.

“Safe.” It comes out harsher than it needed to be and you can see his regret fade back into the comfortable frown you’re so accustomed to.

Aaron sighs, grabs a briefcase from the desk and turns his back to you.

“Let’s get going. Wheels up in 30.”

Greetings from Sharpsburg!

12.06.02    

Hi you!

  I know we live three towns over and I could just pick up the phone, but this is a romantic notion I picked up from that raunchy book I found in Mama’s dresser!  Hopefully Miss Cain will let you come here tomorrow; Daddy’s going to pick up my uncle Kellen from the airport but after you should come for dinner.  I hope Mr Hartman will get this to you before then.

Love, Elizabeth.

A violent breeze calls you back, you’re not sure what happened on the drive to the airstrip but vaguely remember Jennifer’s mouth moving and something about meeting another member of the team on the plane. 

“Why do I only get to travel with you guys once or twice a year?”  Penelope gasps, hurriedly shuffling past you.  She smiles eagerly at a man you don’t recognise; he passes her a coffee in a hot pink mug that she takes gratefully. 

“Oh!” Garcia backpaddles, hands in the air.  You know she doesn’t mean any harm, but instinctually step backwards.  The cool silver of your watch clamps painfully against your wrist where she grabs it, leading you towards him.  Penelope introduces you and moves off to sit by Derek; they smile at each other like scheming children.

He’s tall and gawky, obviously flustered by the change in staffing, his previously relaxed demeanour shifts into awkward, a tight smile.

“Dr Spencer Reid nice to meet you.”  You reply in kind, glad he doesn’t extend a hand. 

You study him while he excuses himself and strides over, settling in opposite Rossi.  Dr Reid is the type of man that goes home alone to vintage first addition books, and the sound of a dripping tap he’s not there enough to be bothered to fix.  His day specific shirts are neatly folded into certain drawers, where his real wool coats hang in seasonal order.  Jennifer had mentioned his eidetic memory, which might be the least interesting thing about him.  He’s older than you, by several years at least, but still baby faced enough that the cops on cases don’t take him as seriously as the others despite his title.

“Okay, let’s get started.”  Aaron gestures and you sit down.

“All three girls have similar victimology, features and body types. He’s definitely got a type.” Your sentence trails off in a sigh without obvious reason and you’re suddenly aware of the faint hum of the jet, the only sound.  “They could be a surrogate for someone in his life, past or present someone who’d wronged him in some perceived way?”  You continue, ignoring the awkward feeling settling in your gut. 

“Yeah, looks like it but what’s with the posing?” Emily hums, looking over the photos one by one.  She doesn’t seem to flinch at the brutality of the crimes, but you can’t judge her.

“It’s interesting, the posing.” Reid states, flicking back and forth over each photo. “It’s as if he’s humiliating them—” 

“It’s dehumanizing.” You accidently cut him off, blurting out your thoughts.

 Reid is the smartest person in the room and everyone knows it, the way his eyebrows shoot into his brown curls says all you need to know on his feelings about being interrupted.

“Sorry, go ahead.” You wince.

“The manner of death is personal, intimate.  They mean something to him, dehumanized after death, no remorse.”  Each word packs a punch, the slight condescending lilt makes your blood boil. 

A minute of oppressive silence follows, something tells you they all know Reid isn’t used to being spoken over.  It’s amusing really, but ruffling feathers on your second day on the job wasn’t how you wanted this to go, so you sigh in resignation and nod, accepting his deduction.

“There’s no discernible MO but according to the M.E Report all girls were extensively sexually assaulted and all in the same manner. Which could help.” Aaron notes, frowning again.

“The unsub crosses socioeconomic backgrounds; Allison Sinclar lived in a rural but wealthy area of Georgia, her father is a retired Georgia Police Sherrif and her mother an English Tutor.”  Derek gestures to the files in your lap. 

“Cassidy’s parents are in the wind?  She’d been bouncing in and out of foster homes for years before her death. If their backgrounds mean something to him, it means he’s had enough time and space to watch them.” It’s aggravating, the seemingly random way this unsub kills young girls, but that doesn’t explain why your hands shake and the pen slips from sweaty palms. 

  It’s like magic, the way he catches it with dextrous fingers. Spencer’s eyes flick to yours for a breath and he nods tightly once again, handing it back without a word.

“That’s true. Good work.” Aaron catches your eye and nods with a tenderness you’ve not seen from anyone since your mother died, the feeling that bubbles up forces your gaze back down.

“When we land, I want you and Reid to go to the medical examiner’s office.” If Aaron wanted you to start this job with confidence, he was definitely going the wrong way about it. You flash pleading eyes at Derek who surprisingly is already watching, or rather smirking at what must be a very distasteful expression.

  Aaron continues, oblivious or unphased; “Emily and I will go to lease with the family, Rossi and Morgan, I’d like you to go to the most recent crime scene. Garcia with JJ set up at the Station, Sherrif Anderson will meet you there.”

“Brace yourself.”

Before you can question Rossi’s order the jet tips, scattering chess pieces all over along with the last dredges of your abandoned coffee.

>

Greetings from Sharpsburg!

26/09/05

Hi you!

I know in my last letter, I said I’d give up this romantic notion!  But it’s just not me.  It’s been different around here the last few months.  Mama’s sick again and Daddy’s working more on the new barn and...

Anyway, I hope Miss Cain will let you come over again soon. I’ve been… 

Love, Elizabeth.

The medical examiner’s office is tucked away in the back of an archaic local hospital.  The instruments lay neatly, shining eerily in the clinical glow.  This part of the job was always the hardest; seeing people’s loved ones, naked on a freezing table just to be dissected and stored away.  It was irrational. You knew this was a very necessary part of the job to eventually catch the unsub and put the victims to rest, but how the two girls laid out like this was just undignified.

“I’m so sorry Agents, I just stepped out for some air.”

She’s not what you expect.  British. Two grey strips of hair frame her face, the rest sleek and brown poured down her back in a glossy ponytail.  She looks about four years your senior, a jagged scar dresses her milky white false left eye.  She carries on around the room, passes a manila folder to Reid and expertly dons a protective gown. 

“I’m Doctor Annabel Clayton.  My parents and I knew the first girl Alison and her parents. They had trouble conceiving so they adopted.” Clayton sighs, looking you in the eye.  A shiver runs down your spine again, making an unwelcomed home in your gut.

“Cause of Death?” Reid asks and you frown, unsure why he had to ask.  Maybe it was just obvious to you? 

“The main cause of death was strangulation.”

“Look at the bruising pattern.” The ever-well-mannered Dr Reid cuts in curiously, squinting at the bruising.  “He did it by hand.”  

“However.”  Dr Clayton slaps down the sheet, covering the young girl’s modesty.  She didn’t look like the type of woman who was used to being talked over in her own office.  “She has some internal bleeding that would have caused her death if he’d not chosen, well, the other.”  She looked sad in a wistful dreamy way, as if a ghost. A small-town purgatory. 

“The other, Cassidy.  She was also manually strangled and sexually assaulted in the same manner.”  Finger shaped bruises bloomed angrily on her grey thighs.  They give way to more, a trail of violence ending at her neck.  The uncharacteristic prickle of tears threatens but are obediently blinked back.

“They could be sisters...” You sigh, in fact you could all be sisters.

Clayton moves on to the last girl, her brooding expression darkening.

“For obvious reasons, I’ll be keeping this poor sweetheart covered from here.”  She strokes Joslyn’s hair.  “She’s still a young girl after all, she’d want to look her best.”

“This is the worst I’ve seen in my career, especially in this area.  Her cause of death wasn’t manual strangulation.” She quips and Reid strides to your side.  The accidental intimacy of it makes your breath catch.  He smells homely, the warming aroma of old books and black coffee, you can’t help but lean into it.  

“Do you want me to carry on?”  That’ll do it. Clayton’s British lilt is like ice water, it’s embarrassing.  You’re leaning into a man you barely know and are frankly not sure you even like?

“Of course, sorry I wasn’t paying attention.”  You stammer, stepping toward the teen girls ghostly face and chest. 

“She was found posed, like Cassidy.  She was leant over a tree stump with the rope around her neck. It was hung from a tree.” 

The picture she passes around is from a distance.  The rope is tied to a gnarled tree, snaking down to bind her wrists, the other hooked over her head and knotted to a taller branch.

“The unsub must be at least six foot to attempt this alone.  Unless they have a partner.” The possibility is frightening, one unsub is hard enough but two?  Say goodbye to sleep for the next few weeks.  

“Okay Agents. I need to get these girls back to their beds.”

You pause for a reply, but looking back catch Reid rubbing his eye with the heel of his hand, as if shielding them from the overly bright strip light.

“You okay there?” 

His jaw is tight, your eyes linger on the way the action accentuates the sharp corner.

“Just a headache. Let’s go.”

> 

The familiar stickiness of the Georgian heat prickles at your back dampening the linen of your shirt, it sticks to your forearms as you roll up the sleeves.  Being back here felt much like the oppressive midday sun, inescapable and suffocating. 

“How was the ME?”  Emily asks, but Reid strides past you toward a waiting Rossi.  She frowns as they disappear into the precinct together, talking animatedly about something you can’t quite hear.

“She’s interesting for sure.” You breathe, skilfully ignoring the vibration from your cell in the back pocket of your pants.

The precinct was mayhem bustling with cops that looked a little too old to be in the field but hated their wives and children too much to retire just yet.  They scramble to sit in rickety office chairs as Aaron and Rossi start to present, you wonder if they’d take your suggestions on board.

As Aaron starts to give a preliminary profile you hear words like previous history of abuse, 18 to 25, local, abandonment issues and surrogate, but you can focus on nothing but the manic buzzing of your phone again.  You’ve changed the number three times in the last 9 months and every time this son of a bitch still manages to find it. You’re seriously debating asking Garcia for help but then reconsider, it’s for the best, keeping them at an arms-length.

As the officers begin to buzz around you, taking calls from the tip line and preparing to interview locals you discreetly slip your cell out and glance at the seven new messages illuminating the screen.

12:24pm – Mason Cook.

Hey bug,

Miller said they’ve had no luck tracing the calls you’ve been having, sorry. I did try. Also, the girl from the coffee shop didn’t recognise the sketch.  I know I keep saying, but I’m sorry. Hope you’re back soon, I’ll leave the key in the normal place.

12:45pm – Unknown

I told you. I’m not going anywhere. It’s about time you paid for taking it all away from me.

[zeawesomebirdie]

Brudick Co-parenting + Batfam Shenanigans Rec List

Thanks to @holybatmandickgrayson for requesting this, and thanks for your patience while I put it together!! (And paging @steine-druff as per usual!) Dick acting as the defacto second parent in the Wayne household is one of the best brudick tropes, and it has my whole entire heart. And the batfam dynamic itself has so much potential and is a joy to read, especially when the common goal of teasing Dick about Bruce is involved!

These are in no particular order, but I've tried to organise them into general categories. The titles to each fic contain a link to it. A lot of these are on the shorter end of the spectrum, but there's a few longer fics included too! I hope you find something here that you haven't read yet!

Co-parenting

1. Till You Find Your Dream by Kyele [@timeforalongstory on tumblr]; rated E; no archive warnings apply; 177,062 words; 31 chapters; complete

Summary:

“You know, my child, that the orphanage cannot continue to support you once you become an adult.” The abbess sighs. “There is one path that is always open to you. You may choose a holy vocation, and take orders. The Sisters of Perpetual Grace will accept you as a postulant if you choose.”

Dick had known to expect this. “Thank you, Reverend Mother,” Dick says respectfully, “but I cannot follow that path.”

The Mother Superior nods. He looks unsurprised. “Then perhaps,” he says, “you would be interested to hear of another opportunity.” From the papers on his desk, the abbess removes a single sheet. “Are you familiar with Captain Wayne?”

---

Dick accepts a position as governess to eight war-orphans, adopted by millionaire and WW1 flying ace Captain Bruce Wayne. The rest is inevitable.

Starting this list off with a bang, this fic is glorious! It's a The Sound of Music AU and A/B/O, and that sounds like a wacky mixture but truly this is one of the best co-parenting brudick fics I've ever read. It features beautiful sibling dynamics, Dick learning to function in high society at the same time as he's teaching the children to do the same, and the best exploration of gender and social roles I've ever come across. And the way the children come to accept Dick as their governess then protect him from being fired by Captain Wayne is utterly glorious!

2. The Fall of An April's Fool by Mysterious_Aud_Lou; rated M; creator chose not to use archive warnings; 3,967 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

All it took was one mission, one week, one bed, and one very tired mistake for Bruce Wayne to realize that he was in love with Dick Grayson.... and then came the fallout.

Bruce and Dick just came back from a mission in which they were fake engaged, and during that short mission, Bruce got a little too used to acting as a couple. Of course, the rest of the batkids pick up on this immediately, but luckily Dick is great at improv, and so this one has lived rent-free in my head ever since I first read it!

Damian Playing Matchmaker

Because I have a very surprising number of recs with this exact premise! These also sometimes double as co-parenting fics with the other batkids besides Damian too :)

1. Covet by resurrectedhippo; rated M; creator chose not to use archive warnings; 16,059 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

Dick Grayson is an extension of Bruce Wayne. If there’s no Bruce Wayne, there’s no Dick Grayson. They struggle to exist without each other.

The entire world wonders if they have ever been separate people.

This one is a little bit of both co-parenting and Damian being the one to force them together. It features Bruce denying his feelings for a million years, Dick helping to train each successive Robin, and so much mutual pining it hurts (affectionate). And of course, Damian calling a family meeting to announce that Bruce and Dick will need to be wed over the summer, much to the shock of every other person in the family

And I'm adding a cut here because this is getting long, but I've got more under the read more!

2. Better than the Sweetest Dream by shield_of_selene; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 15,089 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

Damian accuses Bruce of failing his Valentine’s Day duties; namely, romancing Dick Grayson. This starts a chain reaction that leads to exploding heart bombs, forced imprisonment, and wedding bells.

I love a villain who can commit to the bit, and the Matchmaker, a Valentine's Day themed villain, does not disappoint! This fic also features Damian having a better grasp of Bruce's emotions than Bruce himself does, which is always a delight to see!

3. To Court a Grayson by Mysterious_Aud_Lou; rated T; creator chose not to use archive warnings; 3,285 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

Damian Wayne has always gotten what he wants, and what he wants is his father to realize that Bruce will find no better romantic partner than Damian's beloved Grayson. So, armed with a briefcase and a carefully planned powerpoint presentation, Damian takes on the challenge of convincing his father that it's time to throw all other romantic entanglements aside, and begin to court Grayson properly.

Oh my goodness, where do I even begin with this one? The whole thing is just glorious, featuring Damian hacking into Bruce's work calender, Bruce actually sitting through the entirety of Damian's presentation, and one of the most delightful reveals I've ever read!

General Batfam

1. Old and New by junetangerine; rated E; no archive warnings apply; 5,241 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

Objectively speaking, he knew the man wasn’t infallible or indestructible (heaven knew he’d picked enough fights over it, Bruce insisting on patrolling even when he could barely stand on his own), but the prospect that he might not bounce back into the brilliant steamroller of a man that Dick loved in more ways than was appropriate or healthy was terrifying.

Not as jarring as the Twilight Zone experience of having Bruce look openly delighted to see him.

“Dick!”

It was all Dick could do to remain frozen in place while Bruce crossed the distance between them and just kept going, right into Dick’s personal space and then closer, until his mouth was against Dick’s. It was short, just a firm press of lips, but enough to turn Dick’s world on its head.

---

A head injury leaves Bruce confused. He seems to believe he and Dick are a couple. Dick doesn't have it in him to say otherwise.

Exactly what it says on the tin. This fic is a delight, featuring Dick being incredibly conflicted and Bruce trying to deny his feelings the moment he gets his memory back! Also featuring the various batkids accepting this new dynamic with surprising ease

2. Be Kind, Rewind by kleine_aster; rated T; creator chose not to use archive warnings; 2,138 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

Batman always thinks of everything, except for erasing his old tapes when he really, really should.

This fic is very funny! I greatly enjoyed the dynamics between the various batkids as they processed what they were watching, and Dick's frantic reaction to being caught with Bruce

3. It's A Christmas Miracle (Or Not) by RandomMayhem [@randomlymayhemic on tumblr]; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 6,864 words; 2 chapters; complete

Summary:

With Harley and Ivy causing chaos in Las Vegas, Dick and Bruce must go on an impromptu trip to stop the unruly couple. Only, they aren't quite sure what exactly they're supposed to be stopping...

Waking up married wasn't in the plan, regardless. Not with Damian on the verge of pulling a Rumplestiltskin. So, there's no doubt about it - the holiday season's about to get a whole lot crazier.

In which Damian threatens Dick's firstborn child should they return home late for Hanukkah. This fic is very cute and very enjoyable, and the batfam's reactions to their impromptu marriage are a delight!

4. Truth or Dare by rnedagemacaroni; rated T; creator chose not to use archive warnings; 959 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

This is why the Bat Family kids should not have free time.

Anything with the batkids actually getting to relax and have fun is an amazing read, and this fic is no exception!! Oh to be a fly on the wall during their games of truth or dare!

5. Wayne Family Adventure: the secret episode by Caroaimezoe; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 4,005 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

Prompt: How will the Batfamily take discovering that their dad and big brother/mother have been in a secret relationship for years

I adore the sibling dynamics in this one, and Damian being smug the whole time is just SO cute! There's also so much that could be said about how valiantly Dick tries to keep their relationship secret only to fail so miserably, it's a true delight

And that's all for now! I hope you enjoy these!