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the-story-of-a-teen · 3 years ago

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#mystory

I got inspired by a youtube video, which was a talk by a father that lost his son to suicide. This is what I wish I could tell my parents, when I was a teenager. (I’m 24 now)

If you are suicidal please call the suicide hotline for your country or talk to a mental health professional. TW: This posts discusses suicide, eating disorders, suicidal idealization, religious trauma, verbal abuse, emotional abuse, sexual assault, slut shaming.

01/01/2010

That was the day I was the closest to killing myself, I wanted to poison myself, cut myself, or access the guns, of which I knew were the keys were and I knew where the ammunition was. The thing that stopped myself was my friend Edward, who you claimed was a devil worshipper, a bad influence, and a ‘hussy’. Edward was the only person who seemed to understand me, who took time to be my friend, and would rant with me about the things we went through.

I don’t know how many times I tried talking to you over the years, those times when I went “Hey mom, hey dad, can we talk soon?” “Hey mom, hey dad, can I talk to you but you have to promise not to get mad.” “Hey somethings going on.” but every time I did that, you would get angry, get upset, or invalidate my feelings completely. You didn’t even seem to care that I was struggling, even though I made it as obvious as I could as a 13 year old could. Instead of making time to talk to me, you tried to get me to talk on your time/terms, when I wasn’t ready to talk to you about it. This wasn’t the first time you had done this either. I remember as a child I would try and tell you things and you would shush me, we even had a little nonverbal cue to when I wanted to talk to you, I would hold your wrist when I wanted to tell you something, but you would ignore that as well, no matter how long I waited.

This is why I felt like I could never talk to you about things, you would brush me off as unimportant, you would tell me that without ever saying the words. You didn’t care if I wanted to tell you about something I found interesting, or wanted to ask you if I could go play with my friends.

This leads me into the next reason, you would never let me out of your sight, let me have anything private, or simply do things by myself. Even if I wanted to go play with my friends on the playground less right outside the building you were in, I needed to ask your permission, tell you exactly who I was playing with, and make sure my friends also had permission (when they didn’t need permission). As I grew older this type of overprotection grew more and more. I had to ask you to play in the drive way or back yard, to have my friend’s parents talk to you when we wanted to have a sleep over, to have food from the fridge, to watch tv, to play pinball on the computer, to read, to do anything I wished to do. You then wondered why I had separation issues, you NEVER let me be alone. When I was 10 or 11 I started keeping a journal. It had a lock on it, and I put the keys in a safe place that I thought was secret. One day the keys disappeared. I had put them back, but still searched through my room and the rest of the house, except your room, because you wanted your privacy. The day after that my journal was different from how I originally put it. I thought it was weird, and hid it somewhere else, but you found that spot too. You then brought up very private things I had put into my journal as a vent, things I had certainly never told you, and things I swore I had never told anyone else unless they swore on their mother’s grave and promised not to tell.

You took away my door when I would accidentally slam it when I got emotional, and because you ‘couldn’t trust me to be alone’. You wouldn’t let me hang a curtain or anything so I could change and not have people walk in on me.

When I got old enough to have a cellphone, I caught you sneaking into my room and taking my cellphone, or sitting in my desk chair and going through the messages. You would then interrogate me on my text messages, and would openly take my phone and go through my messages, despite me pleading you not to. This lead to me intentionally setting alarms that would go off through the night, and could only be stopped with a passcode which only I knew.

You would interrogate me any time I wanted to go on the computer to do anything, you forced me to lie to have any sort of freedom to talk to people, look at memes, listen to music, or play games on the computer. You even put parental controls on my computer that would monitor everything and take screen shots, I was allowed exactly 45 minutes a day, which you wouldn’t compromise on, even when I was talking to my friends that lived hours away from us. Then you would get mad when I would trick you into allowing me access so I could change those settings, what else could I do? There was no compromise. Additionally you made me give you every password to every account I ever had, and would get mad when I would change the passwords because you would go through private messages and post on my accounts. Even when I was almost 18, and handed over my computer to show you the receipts, you couldn’t help but go through the whole conversation, even though I told you not to and you promised not to.

On the xbox you would hack into my account (Which I had a passcode on), and would read through the messages, you would have to approve every game and made sure it stood up to your religious and moral standards, or hear me plea to be able to have a game I was interested in. Even when you had approved the game, you had to watch me play it, I wasn’t allowed to enjoy the game on my own.

You thought you were entitled to walk into my room at any time. You wouldn’t listen when I would tell you ‘one moment, I’m changing.’ Instead you would waltz right in, even when I was naked. You would barge into my bathroom, even when I told you to wait. Then you would get mad when I was upset over this. Maybe I didn’t want my parents to see me naked, even though ‘you saw me naked as a baby and child’.

How was I supposed to talk to you openly when you would violate my privacy? When I could have nothing to myself, be able to vent and get my feelings out in a healthy way, to talk about things I didn’t feel I needed to or could tell you, to talk about things I know you all opposed and would interrogate me on, to just talk about day to day things?

When I started dating I was hypersexual. I admit that. When puberty hit I became very sexual and physically affectionate without knowing it, but you started to analyze and criticize me for every action I made. I was touch starved, and craving genuine affection. I wanted to feel loved, to feel wanted, to feel appreciated, and to feel alive. I felt dead inside. I barely got any affection, even from my parents, from other family members, and those I was childhood friends with and was no longer close to. I went to seek that affection with other people, I called my friends parents ‘mom and dad’ because of this and how you all were. You emotionally neglected me. Sure I had physical things, but that wasn’t what I wanted or needed. I need your love, your time, and your acceptance. The only way I got that was through teenage boys that would give me their love, time, acceptance, and physical affection. I even went out seeking any of those things online, which lead me to an early discovery of porn (I was 11), of online chat rooms where I could do smut rps and flirt (I was 13), and teenage dating sites ((common in the 2000′s)(I was 14)). Instead of figuring out what the root of this was, and trying to listen, actually listen, you went about accusing me of different things related to what I had found, even when I wasn’t. You were telling me that you were expecting me to do those things, and that I had to lie to you all to have any sort of freedom. You though dating was only to get married, you had the ‘date to mate’ mentality.

I started dressing in popular clothes of that time, and finding ways of expressing myself and my feelings. Gone were the days of pink dresses and frills. I liked black, blue, and purple, rather than pink and purple. I wanted to wear tighter fitting shirts that were comfortable, easy to move around in, and had fun graphics and words on the chest area. I wanted to wear cute skirts and shorts, as well as skinny jeans, and leggings. You were unhappy with all of it. I was 13 and a C cup, it wasn’t my fault that I couldn’t find anything cute that would comfortably fit. I liked wearing shorter shorts, skirts, skinny jeans, and leggings because they were comfy, easy to move around in, and made me feel free and happy. I can’t tell you how many times you criticized my hair, make up, and clothes. You would constantly tell me that I looked like a hussy, like a prostitute, like an attention seeker, like a devil worshipper, like I was ‘asking to be raped’. You said the same things about other people behind their backs, and you didn’t like it when I used your religion against you. You would ask me if I would wear that around ‘God’, or ‘Jesus, and I would say yes. You would tell me that I would be distracting to guys, or that they would look at me a certain way. I simply said that they shouldn’t look if they can’t control themselves, and that the bible said that any man who looked at a woman with lust in his eyes should gouge them out. You hated when I was right, and would deny that you were wrong.

How was I not supposed to be hypersexual, even when I had been sexualized and been deprived of any affection since I was a child?

At the age of 6 you had me start working out because I had “baby fat” and was overweight at my age. You started only having and making healthy things to eat, then would get mad when I liked the taste of some of them, and would eat more than my ‘portion size’. You limited my food intake, and made me work out so I could ‘loose weight’. At 9 this all got worse, as I was beginning to go into puberty, was getting breasts, and had more baby fat moving to my hips. You started humiliating me for getting seconds at dinner, for eating three meals a day, and for continuing to go through puberty. You would also get mad at me for having things like white bread (I hate the texture of wheat and wholegrain), white rice (I don’t like the texture of brown rice), or any sort of junk food. It was no surprise that I started to starve myself so I would fit your standards.

Why wouldn’t I have an eating disorder when that was all I heard all day every day?

These are the main things that lent to my depression, made it worse, and made me want to kill myself from an early age. These are the main behaviors that made me despise my parents and cut them out of my life. These are what you should avoid. If you want to have your kids in your life, don’t do these.

#mystory #ventpost #mental illness #mental health #toxic parents #bad parenting #my child is completely fine #the signs are there #what not to do when parenting #religious trauma #tw ed talk #depression

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xplrvibes · 4 years ago

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Its the constant boasting that they're having a grand old time while so many deaths keep getting reported all over the country and in Los Angeles that really pisses me off. Its so stupid of them to think that eventhough they're not around a lot of people that its okay to continue to travel and waste so many rapid tests in doing so when they could be used on essential workers. They reported the closing of two test centers because theyre running out of tests. There's also people spending the night in their cars just to get a test and here are all these influencers with their, "We all tested negative so we can film" bull.

(This got long, so some of it is going behind a cut)

Is this about snc?

If so...I am in agreement with everyone that does not understand the point behind filming this series in Utah. I feel like everything they are doing, while exciting and fun, could have been done in CA.

I’ve talked about this before, but the reason I don’t normally get involved in the discussions about people travelling during the pandemic is because I have had to do some travelling during the pandemic (work travel that could not be avoided, one very long cross country drive for a family emergency, and one ill fated overnight trip to the beach over the summer when things were good that I regretted from pretty much the second I got out of my car), and I would feel like a hypocrite coming down on anyone for work/family travel (just to explain why I don't normally talk about this on my blog, for those interested or who think I don't care etc).

Now, having said that, I never did the rapid testing thing (I didn’t even know those existed until very recently-I did the normal testing/quarantining). The rapid testing, I feel, is more of a way to show people “Hey, we’re taking precautions!” which...eh. I don’t think a lot of people really realize how ineffective those rapid tests are. I certainly didn’t until everyone on here started talking about them. So, if the majority of people don’t know what those tests are, they see someone getting a covid test and think, “Oh good, they are being safe,” and leave it at that.

I do agree with what you said, in that I think they genuinely think they are being “safe” by wearing masks around people, staying away from people, and having people test before filming with them. I don’t think they truly realize how much deeper it goes, because honestly-a lot of people in this country don’t. The most you hear is “wear a mask and stay 6 ft apart” so people do that and call it a day, as if that’s the magic cure-all for covid.

I feel like in general (not related to snc whatsoever) people feel like this pandemic was left behind in 2020, especially since we now have a vaccine. There’s this sense of the light being at the end of the tunnel getting everyone all riled up and excited, and I think people are forgetting that the vaccine actually has to be distributed and the country has to actually be vaccinated first, which will take time.

There are other things that I think are motivating the majority of the country, which I won’t even get into. Politics, stubbornness, people being sick and tired of it all, misinformation about what is actually happening, panic over income and their futures-you name it, it could probably be applied to the reason that people just will not accept that the quarantine must continue for a bit and that their inability to just stick with the quarantine is contributing to this whole thing being prolonged the way it has.

Every state is also being handled in a totally different way, with totally different outcomes, which doesn’t help. Florida, for example, is wide open. Nevada, too. I was in Montana a few months ago on my way across country and you would’ve thought covid wasn’t even a thing there. Someone got mad a me for wearing a mask at a gas station. They don’t even want to hear about any of this out there.

So you’ve got people whose whole entire lives and jobs are to travel, make content around travelling, or sell themselves online travelling and being in all these glamorous places...and their state is telling them, “NOPE, you have to stay in.” But there’s no country-wide ban on travel, and there are 49 other states, and some of them are doing things completely differently, so...why not just go to those places and film/make content instead? That way they don’t lose their income, but they also still get to make the same content as always and don’t have to figure out new content, which could potentially flop with their viewers, which could bring down their revenue, etc.

(Disclaimer: I am not saying this is the right way of thinking AT ALL, just that I think this is part of the motivation for some of these influencers)

Now, onto SNC. Some of what I said above probably applies to them, but I wonder sometimes if there isn’t a little bit of resentment/competition in their case as well. Here’s why:

At the beginning of this whole thing, they stayed in the house for months. They didn’t film any new content for snc, they didn’t film any content where they left the house on their personal channels. Even when they did Cerro Gordo over the summer, it was a ghost town with one man living in it, and everyone got tested before and after filming. And guess what? Their views suffered, their popularity went down; people got bored with them and turned to other things. (Sidenote: fandoms are fleeting. Nobody unconditionally loves and supports anyone. If they aren’t giving you content, you will walk away until they start entertaining you again. That’s a fact of fandom life.)

Meanwhile, Corey and Elton just said fuck it and spent this entire pandemic travelling non-stop, with no consequences and very few people calling them out-cause in the grand scheme of things, tumblr and what little of the fandom felt like saying stuff to and about them, does not count as being “called out” on a big scale. TFIL still gets decent viewership (their recent videos did better than SNC’s) and there was literally no long term consequence to their actions, covid wise.

So lets say, SNC start thinking, “Damn...Elton’s doing this shit, Corey’s doing this shit, they’ve managed to keep it going all this time and nobody’s said anything to them...it must be easier than we thought to safely travel/film during a pandemic. And obviously nobody cares if they’re doing it...so why can’t we do it, too?” And off they go.

Now, I’m not saying thats how they feel and, if it is, I’m not saying thats the right way to feel...but nobody is perfect. Resentment and competition and the need to continue to make money drives us all sometimes. SNC aren’t saints. I don’t think for a second that they are inherently bad people, but they are PEOPLE. People are dumb. People do dumb shit for bad reasons with little thought to the big picture or to how their actions affect others sometimes.

All this to say: they are idiots. They’re gonna do whatever they are gonna do, until they realize it isn’t safe, finally start getting called out on a big scale by their fandom, get covid, get stuck in some random state and have to make the Rubik’s Cube video I am so honestly excited about, or until they get the vaccine...whichever comes first.

I completely understand how frustrating all of this is, because even I, the person who doesn’t normally get involved in these discussions, kind of did a, “YIKES,” when I saw their insta stories. I wish I had better answers, or knew how to get in touch with them to knock their heads together and knock some sense into them.

And please, don’t take any of this as a defense against snc, or any influencers in general. I just think that human motivation is an interesting thing, and I think everyone has a reason (good or bad) for the reasons they do things. Everyone is the hero of their own story, as they say...so nobody can see when they are being the bad guy.

Also, this got really, really long and I apologize. I need to cut down on my rants. But I love the asks!

#asks #if this sin't about snc i apologize but it probably still fits

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bonnieisaway · 5 years ago

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i actually started writing it

i said i’d write it and i’m here to dissapoint

title doubles as a link to it on wattpad if you’d like to read it over there so

chap 1. - this was never the way i planned

Saiki noticed it the other day when he was observing Satou's perfectly average normalness as always. He was standing with a girl Saiki usually didn't see him talk to. It's a girl with (h/l), (h/c) hair and (e/c) eyes. She's a stereotypical looking girl..which is.. no surprise considering Satou is the crowd he hangs out with. But even then, she seems to be considered pretty by most of the class, judging by the thoughts that flooded in Saiki's head.

Toritsuka walks around from the other door of the classroom and behind Saiki. "Spying on Mr. Normal again?" He asks, seemingly annoyed with Saiki's actions as if he isn't a parasite himself.

"Be quiet. You'll never understand why he's so perfect." Saiki hushes him telepathically, continuing to observe. The girl is sitting on her desk- right next to Satou's- swinging her legs cheerfully and chatting with him as he sits at his desk. "Who's the girl he's talking to?" Saiki asks curiously.

"Huh?" Tortisuka hums, looking around Saiki trying to see who it was in question. "Oh, that's (L/n)! The prettiest girl in Class 2. I don't know how you haven't heard of her before. She's pretty popular in the class because she does commissions for art and stuff. That, and she was apparently born in America." Saiki could tell by the name.

Saiki nods, observing quietly still. "Which gives me an idea! Follow me." Tortisuka perks up. Saiki sighs to himself, muttering a "good grief." Whatever dumb plan Tortisuka had in his head, Saiki didn't want to be apart of.

"No." Saiki refuses blankly as Tortisuka starts tugging on my his weakly.

"Come on! It'll get you in Satou's crowd." He argues, continuing to tug.

Saiki's quiet for a second. "..Fine. Just let go of my arm." Saiki sighs. "And don't try anything on the girl."

"What's it to you?" Tortisuka lets go of Saiki but nudges him as hard as he can. Which, really, felt like a weak poke.

"Don't disturb the peace of normal." Saiki glares at him as he's only left to follow him as he approaches Satou and (L/n).

"...I know! And the dude kept going on and on about being a big 'influencer' that could get me exposure and I'm just like, dude, pay me or I'm not drawing your icon!" (L/n) rants on to Satou as Tortisuka and Saiki slowly come closer in earshot.

"Thats..wow. Yikes." Satou comments.

"I deal with it all too much. I just don't get why people refuse to pay artists. I mean, it's how money has worked for hundreds of years, and 'exposure' isn't necessarily a currency, g-" (L/n) rants on and on before she's interrupted. By Tortisuka.

"(L/n)! Funny seeing you here." Tortisuka tries to squint his eyes for more 'appeal' as he leans on Satou's desk. From closer up, as much as Saiki hated to agree with Tortisuka, (L/n) was undoubtedly pretty. Flecks of gold surround her pupils and an everlasting blush crosses over the bridge of her nose from cheek to cheek. As Saiki stares, he begins to notice- his x-ray vision doesn't work on her. Which was strange and confusing, because it worked on everyone else. In fact, he could see the bones of Tortisuka out of the corner of his eye.

Saiki's mind begins to wonder- was she a physic? Did she have some sort of other power? Was she a fanfiction protagonist? Only one of these were correct, but Saiki didn't know that.

"Ah.. Toritsuka." (L/n) seems to be aware of how much of a parasite he is. "Eyes are up here. What's up?" ..And even then, she's still kind to him. Saiki elbows Toritsuka in the side to pull his eyes out of her chest.

He grunts in pain and stands up straight. "Well, my good friend Saiki here-" He nudges Saiki. He nods his head in acknowledgement. The quicker he stops making a fool of himself, the better. "-heard about your commissions and wanted to get a commission."

(L/n) straightens her back and pulls her phone out of the pocket of her skirt. "Give me a second, Satou." She smiles at him before turning back to Saiki and Tortisuka. She starts tapping the screen. "Alright. What do you want a commission of?" She hands her phone to Saiki, expecting him to take it. "There's some examples of my art."

Saiki slowly swipes through the gallery on (L/n)'s phone. There was a good mix of different drawings here, he assumed fitting to her own style. He didn't know much about art but he thought it was good.

"He wanted a drawing of..uh..himself!" Toritsuka makes up as he hands the phone back to (L/n). That sounds egotistical in Saiki's opinion, but oh well.

"Oh, that's fine!" (L/n) laughs. "Do you know how many people have tried to ask me to draw Kokomi in all these weird ways this week alone? I just can't catch a break." She sighs through her laughter as she taps a few apps. "Let me get a picture of you real fast."

She holds up her phone to take a picture, and Tortisuka throws his arm around Saiki's shoulder. It takes all his willpower to not punch him in the gut, frankly. "Out of the picture, Toritsuka." (L/n) sighs, as soon as he slips away she takes the picture, and then puts the phone back in her pocket.

She hums again for a second. "So, how much?" Tortisuka asks her.

"Can't you let him talk for himself?" She grins cheekily. "I'm thinking." She hums again for another second, nodding slowly and looking Saiki up and down briefly. 'He seems nice and the first guy this week that didn't ask for a naked picture of Kokomi. Plus, it should be an easy drawing.'

"Here's the deal- since I need the practice drawing guys, and it would've been pretty cheap anyway, I'll give it to you free. That cool?" She smiles. Saiki nods, ready to get this over with.

"Hey, what the hell, you charged me like 2000 yen for a drawing!" Toritsuka argues.

"Registered sex offenders do not get cheap artwork." (L/n) laughs. She's only teasing him but Saiki cant help but grin a bit. "Plus, you've asked me to draw poses of women I didn't even know were possible."

Toritsuka grumbles about something that Saiki did not want to hear. (L/n) turns back to me. "But anyway. I'll get it to you either tomorrow or the day after." She smiles kindly. "Class is starting soon, though. You should head back to your classroom. I'll see ya around." She waves Saiki and Tortisuka off politely and turns back to Satou.

..Well.

𝕥𝕚𝕞𝕖𝕤𝕜𝕚𝕡

Late at night after school. Saiki lies in his bed staring at the ceiling blankly. As night falls the number of voices buzzing in his head usually falls quieter but even then he can't bring himself to sleep and after a while, memorizing the pattern of the popcorn ceiling gets boring. Saiki crosses his eyes, figuring he'll just randomly pick someone he knows if they're awake. See what they're doing.

Random selection leaves Saiki to be observing (L/n). She's laying across a couch, some sort of tablet in her lap as she uses a stylus to draw. In the corner of the screen was a video call with a male friend of hers.

"Oh my god, shut up!" She laughs in English, pen stylus gliding across the screen as she draws Saiki. He figures that's no surprise, considering the events from earlier that day.

Her friend- a guy- sticks his tongue out at her. "What are you drawing?" He asks.

"This guy at my school." (L/n) shrugs. "Remember that Toritsuka guy? He introduced his friend who apparently wanted a commission of himself. But he's pretty chill and I need practice drawing guys so I said I'd do it for free."

"You need to stop giving away free art." Her friend shakes his head. The drawing Saiki can see over (L/n)'s shoulder is actually pretty good. He wouldn't admit it, but he liked it a lot.

"You try getting commissioned the same drawing of the same girl everyday and then not be ecstatic when someone doesn't ask for it, (F/n)." (L/n) rolls her eyes to (F/n).

"Well, that aside, how's your school been?" (F/n) asks. In the corner of the tablet screen her (L/n) had positioned his video, Saiki can see (F/n) wandering around and doing random things.

"Ah, you reminded me." (F/n) perks up. "They're switching me to class 3."

"What, why?"

Saiki felt the same way. Why was she switching to class 3? Why was the author pulling crappy plot convenient twists so early in the story?

"Yeah. The principal talked to me about- something about my test scores being better fit there, I don't really know. I only know, like, three people in that class." (L/n) shrugs, continuing to draw. She was kidding, right? There's no way. It cannot get this convenient for her.

Out of the corner of Saiki's eye, he sees the time in the corner of (L/n)'s tablet. 12:39AM... He sighs to himself. He's stayed up awfully late for having school in the morning. He uncrosses his eyes and rubs them. Doing that for so long hurt..

He figures he should get to sleep. He glances towards the toy, green-lensed glasses on his desk. He couldn't see through (L/n) with xray vision but could hear her thoughts clear as day and clairvoyance worked just fine. He couldn't help but wonder- how would his other powers work on her..?

𝕥𝕚𝕞𝕖𝕤𝕜𝕚𝕡

Saiki doesn't need to read minds to know that (L/n) was switching to class 3 today. Unfortunately for him, could hear everyone's thoughts as always.

Saiki was conflicted as to how to feel about (L/n). On one hand, she was a perectly average girl with her own few talents and special things about her. A perfect kind if person, by Saiki's definition. But there's a problem or two....

'(Y/n)'s coming to my class now, this is great! I knew God loved me! Maybe, with our beauty combined, I can finally make Saiki say 'oh!''

..Teruhashi and her seem to be good friends. Which is unfortunate because Teruhashi attracts attention. And ontop of that, his classmates consider (L/n) overly beautiful. He wouldn't admit it to himself or anyone else but a part of him agreed. He'd say it a million times but he didn't want to stand out.

"Hey, buddy!" Nendo waves a hand in front of Saiki's face. "Did you hear about the new girl?" He asks.

"There's a new girl?" Kaido asks. "Do you know anything about her?"

"Her name's like, (L/n), or something." Nendo shrugs. "I heard she was cool."

"Oh, (Y/n)! I know her!" Kaido brightens. "She didn't tell me she was transferring to our class."

"How come you know her?" Nendo asks.

Kaido's face turns red. 'I'm not telling them that I call her the escaped princess fro Dark Reunion for her own sake.' Kaido thinks to himself, unknowning he just spilled that secret to Saiki. Saiki was curious as why he called her that though. (L/n) wasn't the 8th-grade-syndrome type. "I met her freshman year when she moved here. We used to eat lunch together." Kaido shrugs, trying to play it off.

Before Nendo can call his bluff or any other nuisance Saiki knows can wander over, the teacher steps in the classroom and quiets us. "Class, today a girl from class 2 is switching to our class." The teacher begins. The class' minds begin to bubble up with excitement as they await (L/n) to step into the class.

"Please welcome her to our class." The teacher sighs, before turning towards the door and beckoning (L/n). (L/n) steps in the classroom and smiles. She seemed to be more glowy and happy than most days.

And as Saiki expected, almost the entire class gasps at her beauty. "I'm (L/n) (Y/n)." She smiles. "I moved here from America two years ago. I hope you guys will welcome me." 'Yikes, that sounds cheesy. Shouldn't have said that. Why are there so many guys with their mouths open? Oh shit, wait, that's Saiki. I didn't know he was in class 3.' (L/n)'s thoughts ramble on.

"You may take a seat next to Saiki." The teacher gestures to Saiki and the conviently open seat to his right. (L/n) smiles and nods, walking over and taking a seat next to Saiki.

On one hand, (L/n) seemed perfectly average in every other regard and seems to be less annoying than everyone else who chooses to 'bother' Saiki everyday. But because the girl excels in beauty and creativity, she draws a bit more attention then Saiki would like. He'd have to figure out how to play his cards right. He's said it a million times but, again, he didn't like attention. But seemingly normal attracts normal and that's what he needs to be a bit more normal. It's just like the female version of Satou. Atleast, that's what Saiki would keep telling himself.

Truth is- Saiki was oddly drawn to the girl. To you. He couldn't exactly figure out why so the best reason he came up with. Normal attracts normal. And Saiki is just a normal highschooler who happens to be an esper.

"Hey, Saiki!" (L/n) smiles and turns to the boy in thought. The teacher left the class to study and chat. Saiki figured she just wasn't having it today. "I didn't know you were in this class."

"Surprise." He responds flatly. (L/n) laughs. 'Hey, he's smiling. He looks nice when he's smiling.' Saiki chose to ignore that. He wasn't smiling. Don't know what she's taking about. She needs her eyes checked because Saiki wasn't smiling because of her adorable and heartwarming laugh.

"Hey, so, we should hang out sometime." She brings up casually. Saiki looks up curiously. "You seem pretty cool. Plus I know Tortisuka just had me draw you as an excuse to talk to me, but it's all good." (L/n) shrugs, leaning back in her chair. "Can't change that boy..."

Saiki sighs. "...Fine. Sure." He's got no choice but to reluctantly agree. Is what he keeps telling himself because (L/n) is a nice girl whos really hars to say no to for some reason.

Saiki's friends circle his desk as every other day but now it extends to (L/n)'s desk as well. He'd feel bad for them bothering her, but it seems that she already knew some of them and didn't mind them.

"(L/n)! You didn't tell me you were transferring to our class!" Hairo smiles, approaching her desk.

"Haha, sorry!" (L/n) scratches the back of her head. "I fell asleep kind of early and I didn't get a chance to tell many people.." 'Early? It was 12 in the morning.' Saiki thinks to himself. Despite all that, he was a bit curious as to how she knew all of them.

"You didn't tell me either." Teruhashi comments.

"Yeah, I know, I know, I'm sorry! I was told after school and I got busy the whole rest of the day." (L/n) apologizes.

"It's alright, (Y/n)!" Kaido smiles, his face bright red. "At least you're here now!"

'Hey. Kusuo. Kuusuuuoooo! Answer me, damnit.' Aiura bugs Saiki with her thoughts. Saiki about rolls his eyes into the back of his head. Aiura made this a daily habit ever since she knew Saiki had powers a long time ago. 'Turn off your aura. I wanna see the new girl's aura.' Saiki sighs, but atleast she's said something with an ounce of thought to it for once. Saiki turns down his overly godlike aura and the auras flood back into Aiura's vision as she focouses on (L/n)

'Oh, shit.' Aiura thinks to herself, looking (L/n) up and down. Saiki's intrest peaks as he excuses himself from his friends, walking to Aiura's seat near the back of the class. He slips off one of his gloves so he could use phsycometery to see what Aiura saw.

"What's it look like?" He asks, going to set his hand on her shoulder.

She jumps away from Saiki suddenly, nearly falling out of her chair. "KYAA! It's, it's nothing! Just a normal aura! It's all chill! All good in the hood!" She screams defensively. 'That's not very normal.. very artsy and colorful aura...even then it kind of reminds me of Teryukoko's aura, but...' Her thoughts aside, the more she screams the less she sounds like a gyaru and more like someone who saw one rap song and tried speaking like the rapper.

"You know I can hear your thoughts, right?" Saiki asks her.

She jumps back again. "AAAH!! Stop that!"

"Yare yare...That's not how my powers work." Saiki sighs. He wasn't sure why she was so freaked out about (L/n)'s aura but he figured she'd tell him soon enough. Even then, Kuboyasu and Kaido's aura shocked her, so it can't be anything that bad, right?

Saiki turns and walks back to his desk, his friends welcoming him back as he sits down. He turns to look at (L/n) as she meets Nendo, Yumehara, and Kuboyasu. He did have to wonder.. what could it have been that freaked out Aiura so bad? The only thing that freaks her out is when its super bad or it's connected to Saiki.

He supposed it couldn't be too bad. She's still just a perfect, average girl anyways.

"Hey, lets go to the arcade after school!" Kaido invites (L/n) excitedly, face bright red.

"Sure, why not!" (L/n) agrees, smiling brightly. "I haven't been to one in a while."

"I'll come too!" Nendo invites himself.

"I've got time to kill, so..." Kuboyasu trails off as he joins the party... Saiki sighs to himself. He supposed he was "obligated" to come aswell.

'That was kind of surprising to see for a girl like her...Well, I suppose everyone gets it eventually...' Aiura's thoughts bumble on in Saiki's mind as his friends continue to converse. 'But still, even then..' She sighs, letting her head rest in her palm.

'Having a red string...'

wc: 3014

i told ya’ll it’d dissapoint

i hate the opening So Much but i have stopped caring at this point so

#saiki kusuo #saiki kusuo no psi nan #saiki k x reader #saiki kusuo x reader #why did i write this #and why is it unnessecarily long #iiiiiiiim so tired #you're welcome to unfollow me

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lonelypond · 4 years ago

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Idols

Love Live x Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, 3.9K, 1/2

This is entirely your fault, Tumblr ; )

Out skating one day, Yazawa Nico, Kousaka Honoka, Hoshizora Rin, and Sonoda Umi are accidentally exposed to a mutagenic gel, causing Umi's werewolf traits to be transmuted to the other three. A year later, they find themselves in trouble again as they meet four individuals who know a lot about mutations. And pizza.

Practice Interupted

The sheer shiny cliffs of buildings surrounded Sonoda Umi, the moon a cool silver slash in the sky, her ears alert for any sound. They were meeting here tonight, for meditation practice, now, when the influence of the moon was slim, controllable. Nothing about the three young women who Umi was expecting was controllable, so she had to settle for what she could.

“Hey, Nico, there’s a car! Watch it.” Kosaka Honoka’s voice shouted from the west and Umi turned in that direction.

“Nico Nico Ni!” There was the high, shrill call of Yazawa Nico’s battle cry and Umi could see in her mind the tiny, twin tailed tornado torque off the front of a car or slide under a truck or some severely dangerous manuever.

“Wait for me, Nico!” And there was Rin, about to catch up, speed past, and do something even stupider than Nico had done. Umi sighed. Her life was now inextricably linked with those three maniacs and the burden was on her, since she had burdened them with her curse.

A Year Ago

“C’mon Umi, this is boring. I told Nico and Rin I’d meet them at the skatepark.” Honoka whined, her t-shirt untucked from her board shorts, her hair shoved under a backwards snapback.

“You are going to flunk more than half of your midterms if you do not allocate several days for study.”

“Umi, I’m bored, I had to sit in class all day and now, Rin’s got a cool tricks she’s showing off that I need to learn.”

“What you need to learn is how to conjugate verbs in English.”

Honoka rolled her eyes, “Been there, bored that.”

“That doesn’t even make sense.”

Honoka bit into a pastry and then stuck her tongue out at Umi, before sending her board rolling ahead. “See you at the park.” And Honoka hopped on her board and sped away.

Umi snarled. She could feel her anger rising. She glanced up at the sky. Still late afternoon, not yet moonrise. Maybe she could talk some sense into Honoka. Umi centered her chi, did three deep breaths, and then took off at a steady jog for the skating bowl Rin, Nico, and Honoka preferred.

###

Yazawa Nico was all set. Tokyo Olympics coming up, skateboarding was a full fledged, medal event, and Yazawa Nico was on track to level up her skills to crack the competitive circuit. Add charm, cuteness, and an unparalleled knowledge of the skate scene and Nico was about to make a HUGE splash, launching her own clothing line next month. Honoka’s best friend, Kotori had helped out and the custom shirts and bandanas were going to be seen in TWIG skating videos worldwide.

“Hey, Nico.” Rin hissed in her ear, sliding next to where Nico was sitting on the lip of the bowl.

“Yo?”

“That girl” RIn pointed to a tall redhead in jeans and a tight gray polo shirt, “keeps taking pictures of you. I think she’s in my grade.”

Nico leaned back and yes, there was a redhead with an actual camera, not just a phone, circling the skate park, pausing to kneel or lie down or prop herself at an odd angle to snap a shot. She saw Nico looking and startled, nearly dropping her camera.

“Hot.” Nico thought, then smiled, “Hey, if you want Nico to pose for you just say so.” Nico bounced up, dropped her board, and rocked an ollie into a nosegind, to pop up in front of the girl.

“I...I’m...you’re just here and I...have…” the girl seemed to be choking on air and waved her camera in Nico’s direction instead of finishing her sentence. Long eyelashes blinked over shimmering lavender pools.

Nico kicked her board up, flexing as she caught the nose, glad she’d worn a tank top. Sweaty though. But she’d pulled off a sweet move.

“What’s your TWIG? Tag Nico when you post your snaps. @NicoNollie.” Nico stepped forward and the taller girl tried to step back, but nearly fell over a huuba ledge. Nico reached out her arm and pulled the girl in close. She smelled like flowers. Nico stared into wide, surprised eyes, and then felt herself falling back when the girl shoved her.

“Hey!” Nico screamed as she dropped her board and rolled down the bowl slope, scraping her elbow.

“I didn’t ask you to touch me.” The girl pouted.

“Maki!” Rin yelled suddenly. “Nishikino Maki. We have study hall together. You say hi to Kayo-chin sometimes.”

The girl turned, eyes narrowed, “I don’t know you.”

“But you know my best friend, Kayo-chin? She’s in all your smart classes. Glasses, cute, super super smart.”

“Koizumi?”

Rin nodded as Nico pulled herself back up to ground level, glaring at her assailant, while she wiped her elbow, “Where’s the first aid kit?”

Rin shrugged, “So you skate, Maki?”

“No.”

“Want to skate? We can teach you.” Rin offered as Nico sat with her legs hanging down, wincing as she put an alcohol rub she'd found in her pocket on the scrape.

“No.” Maki opened her camera bag, settling her Fuji inside.

“So why are you taking pictures of Nico and then injuring Nico when she saves you from falling?” Nico awkwardly placed a cute bunny bandaid over her wound.

Maki glanced away, crossing her arms, one hand reaching up to play with her hair, “Had to take sports pictures for class.”

“And skateboarding is the best sport.” Nico’s voice boomed with approval.

Maki shrugged, “I like that girls and guys skate the same. And I didn't have enough time to hit the surfing spots.”

“Nico surfs.” Nico announced.

Rin glanced down, puzzled, “Since wh…”

Nico’s elbow connected at bruising speed with Rin’s shin.

“Nico?!??!!”

“Just shut it, Rin.” Nico stood up, stepping up to Maki, “So did when you post the snaps of Nico’s favorite tricks, you’ll tag Nico.” There was a pause as Nico levelled a serious glare at the photographer, “Right?”

Maki shrugged, turning away from Nico. Nico’s hand shot out, grabbed Maki’s shoulder and spun the other girl back to face her, “Right?”

Maki tensed, ready to open her mouth for a rant when a crouching body on a board zoomed between them.

“Save me, Nico. I’m not fast enough.”

“Honoka, what the hell…”

“She’s after me, Nico. She’s going to ruin everything!” Honoka 180'ed and hopped off next to Nico.

“What’s happening?” Maki asked, wondering if she should just leave.

“Her’ Nico grabbed Honoka by the back of the shirt, “ninja bff is about to drag her off to study.”

“You have to save me Nico!”

“Nico has her own problems.”

“Honoka.” Umi’s voice, though calm, carried. And then a siren blared, startling all the girls clustered around the skate bowl.

“You can’t make me study.” Honoka shouted.

“Let Honoka go, Nico.” Umi slowed, hands on hips, glaring at Honoka.

“Gladly.” Nico dropped Honoka, brushing her hands together.

“This happens all the time, Maki.” Maki was surprised to find Rin suddenly next to her, chatting as if they talked every day.

“I don’t really see how it affects me.”

“Nico never studies either. But then her Mom gets on her. Nico’s got it tough. Her dad died and she’s the big sis.”

“I don’t really care.” Maki was fascinated by the energetic gestures Nico was throwing around as she mediated between the other two girls.

“Anyway, Nico’s the best and I bet you got cool photos.” Rin gleamed, “Can’t wait to see them.”

“I don’t even know you." Maki rolled her eyes at her conversation partner.

Rin had a bright idea, “Hey, sit with us at lunch. Kayo-chin would love that. Aren’t you usually by yourself?”

Maki frowned, it sounded like she had no friends, but she just liked to play games on her phone without interruption and this Rin seemed to be all interruptions. “I’m fine. It’s not…”

And before Maki could finish her sentence or Umi could strangle Honoka, an out of control motorcycle with a glowing canister strapped to the back vroomed toward them. Nico leapt for Maki and Rin, an arm around each of them, pulling them down in the bowl. As the bleeding driver fell off and the cycle forced Umi and Honoka to roll after Nico, the canister broke free, spilling a viscous gel across everyone but Maki, who watched in horror from where Nico had pushed her as the other girls thashed and screamed.

BACK TO NOW

Umi frowned. This was worse than she expected. Nico’s head was cocked at the angle for ultimate sassiness, her fur ears forward, alert, and smug. Ruby eyes flickered between dare and amusement. Nishikino Maki, who had not been invited to tonight’s session, was sitting on the edge of the roof, doing a terrible job of hiding her amusement at Umi looming over a smug Nico.

“This is not a date night, Yazawa."

“We’re not dating.” Nico and Maki echoed. Rin giggled, her ginger tail swaying.

Umi rolled her eyes, “You need to get serious about your training, Nico. You remember what happened last month?”

Nico’s confidence dented slightly, “No one was hurt.”

Honoka was perched next to Maki, glad Umi was lecturing someone else tonight, “I don’t know, Nico. A lot of people might have wanted to eat ice cream and you wiped out the whole freezer section.” Honoka’s grin showed her full set of fangs.

Umi sighed and addressed herself to Maki, who was usually responsible, “Did Nico drag you here?”

“Mrs. Yazawa came home early so I didn’t have to watch Nico’s brothers and sisters. So I was bored.” Maki shrugged.

“Maki needs to learn self control anyway, so she doesn’t yell at cute little Nico so often.” Nico winked.

“Maybe if cute little Nico didn’t stalk every girl who said something about how cute her ears are, I wouldn’t have to. You’re supposed to be discrete.”

“I have to agree with M…” Umi started.

“People think it’s cosplay, Nico’s gimmick, super duper cute.” Nico raised her hands to her temple, “Nico Nico Ni, Nico wins EVERY popularity contest.”

“Not mine.” Maki muttered.

“It is supercute. If we had to catch something from Umi,” Rin said as she grabbed at her bobbing tail, “I’m glad it was furriness.”

“You didn’t ‘catch’ furriness, Rin.” Maki stated. “Exposure to the mutagen caused your dna to alter, influenced by Umi’s lycanthropy.”

“Well, I like my tail.” Rin slapped the back of Maki’s head with it as Maki snarled.

“Too bad you didn’t get anything cute.” Rin teased.

Umi sighed. This session had gotten out of control even faster than usual. Her exposure to the mutagen had caused her hair to grow all the way down her back, her wolf ears present every day, not just during the days around the full moon. And the full array of animal senses Umi could never turn off, so she could sense so much more than anyone was willing to confess. Even if Nico and Maki refused to admit they were dating, their scent profiles and pheremones screamed it loud enough that Umi wanted them living several states apart. And Umi could feel her own attraction to Honoka, as well as the need to wrestle with the fact that Honoka had yet to mature fully. Rin also remained in a state of innocence, friendly to everyone, and very attached to Koizumi, but not yet ready for...Umi couldn’t even think the words in her mind...adult things. Eager for a distraction, she focused on Nico, who was watching Maki shove Rin away from her. Nico watching Maki was one of her few calm states so Umi hated to break the mood, but maybe they could transition to meditation. Or at least a few breathing exercises.

“Everybody on their feet. We’re going to start with warmups.” Not too much grumbling as the three settled into their starting pose. Umi nodded at Maki, “If you’re here, you work out with us, Maki.”

Maki considered, but instead of making a show of protest, joined Nico where she was standing behind Rin and Honoka. Nico suddenly became much more focused on her positioning, her posture improving almost immediately. Maybe Maki being here would be a boon.

Something metallic zinged by Umi’s ear. She whirled, reaching for a weapon she didn’t have. Nico’s voice screeched behind her, “MAKI!”

Umi was too busy searching for the threat to look behind her, but from the sounds, she guessed the dart had hit Maki, who had fallen, to be caught by Nico’s quick reflexes. So Nico was busy. Umi inhaled. 10 warriors, encircling the roof. “Rin, grab my bag. Honoka, to me. Nico…”

“Got her.” Nico said before Umi could finish.

Rin tossed weapons to everyone and Umi started the mental meditation that would allow her wolf side to take over completely. It had become so much easier since the accident to slip into the body that only the full moon used to summon. Nico would transform when she was angry, so Umi was teaching her restraint, and with Rin and Honoka, it seemed to be a random thing, more of a joy than a burden. But since as young as she could remember, Umi’s training at the Sonoda Dojo had been about controlling her animal side, so the others just opening freely to the change was a puzzle.

Umi readied her stance, gripped her no-dachi in her thumbed paws, and parried the first blow. Figures in black rushed her, trying to surge around her. Rin was at her right, with a katana, Honoka a little further to left so her naginta could use its full range. They were the wall protecting Maki.

And then out of the sky came commentary. “Hey, look, Leo, creepy ninjas vs. samurai furries. Are we in a video game?”

A more commanding voice stage whispered, “Quiet.”

And then a deeper, rolling grumble, “Yeah, Mikey, you’re blowing our surprise attack”

“Nah, these guys are even stupider than…”

“You?” the grumble hissed as three green blocky figures dropped in front of Umi, ninja weapons flashing as they pushed the attackers back.

“Hey, they’re girl samurai.” One of the newcomers stopped to stare long enough that Umi saw a simple, cloth, orange mask and a turtle shell. “Cool.”

“Umi.” Nico sounded panicked. “Maki’s not responding to me at all.”

A slash of the no dachi lamed an opponent and Umi stepped back to let Rin, Honoka, and two of the newcomers cover her as she fell back to Nico’s position.

“Is she breathing?”

“Barely.” Nico grimaced as she showed Umi a dart, “Poison?”

Umi sniffed, shaking her head, “Sedative. Might be too high a dose.”

Nico was blinking at a hyper sonic rate, to keep any tears from leaking out, “We’ve got to get her off the roof.”

“Can you and Rin carry her?”

Nico nodded.

“Rin. Help Nico.” Umi ordered.

Rin was there before Umi finished her sentence, raising Maki off the ground. And then ten more ninjas dropped in.

Nico, with a burst of adrenaline, bent down to swing Maki over her shoulder while Rin moved to intercept the first attacker. And then one of the turtles cartwheeled past Umi, grabbing Maki from Nico, and heading to the roof’s edge, the ninjas encircling them.

“Hey!” Nico shouted, pulling out her twin swords, cutting her way into the scrum.

A sudden flurry of arrows and shuriken flew toward them and then, with majestic poise, this turtle, head wrapped in a tattered red mask, froze, a surprised look on its face, and toppled forward. Before Nico could reach Maki, the creepy ninja scrum had grabbed Maki and gone over the roof. Nico watched them pull away in a van, and then collapsed on the roof edge, arms out, head hanging down, whispering “Maki.”

“Don’t worry, I put a tracker on their van.” A three fingered green hand grabbed the roof edge next to Nico, and a turtle face wearing a purple mask turned to smile at Nico. “I’m Donatello. Call me Donnie. These are my brothers. Why’d the Foot Clan kidnap your girlfriend?”

Nico lifted her head just barely enough to glare at the green face six inches from her nose, “Ask the Foot Clan.”

Donnie, jumped up on the roof, and pulled a pad out, with a green blip moving away from them. Nico grabbed it, “Umi, we have to follow them. Now.”

Umi was parrying three swords so Nico’s demand went unanswered. With a massive effort, Umi threw her opponents back, howled, and bashed each of them with the hilt, knocking them unconscious. Rin and Honoka had the rest tied up, with the help of the two conscious Turtles. Nico shoved the one who’d grabbed Maki with her foot as she pulled the dart from its shoulder, “They got this one with a dart too. Can we go rescue Maki now?”

“Hey, Leo, let’s take the Shellraiser.” the orange masked Turtle said as he put his weapons away.

“What’s a Shellraiser?” Rin and Honoka asked in unison and the Turtle waved them to the street side of the roof and pointed down at a subway car converted into some kind of travelling siege engine.

“Whoa!” Honoka

“Can I drive?”’ Rin bounced with excitement.

“No.” Nico had a grappling hook out and was about to drop off the roof. “Shotgun speeding.”

“Excuse me.” The blue masked Turtle held out its palm, in a stop gesture, “I’m the only driver. And we can rescue your friend.”

“Who even are you?” Nico glared, grappling hook ready to bash.

“Leonardo. Leo. These are my brothers, Donatello, Michelangelo, and Raphael.”

“Sleeping Beauty.” The orange masked one snorted.

“The unemployable comedian is Mikey.” Donnie explained.

“Nico doesn’t care if you’re Ms. Zoo America. They took Maki.”

“Do you know why?” Leo asked.

“DO I CARE WHY?” Nico was screaming, her arms flailing as the grappling hook got closer to landing a secure grip in Leo's nostril. Then she pivoted, “Umi. Help Nico.”

“We are very pleased to meet fellow guardians of goodwill, but our friend’s situation appears to be urgent. So we have no time for non productive chatter.”

Nico checked the pad, her voice hitting a panicky high note. “They stopped. Which means whatever weird thing they’re going to do to Maki is about to start.” Nico paled, her ears slumping.

Umi stepped up to Leonardo, her hand out, “I will be commandeering your vehicle now.”

Nico was furled up, a low growl drawing the attention of the Turtles. They watched as she transformed, increasing in size until she became the size of a large bear, black fur covering her completely.

Mikey pushed Leonardo, “Leo’s the only one who gets to drive the Shellraiser, It’s a rule.”

"Shellraiser?" Raph sat up, rubbing his forehead. "We're saving the girl." Donnie whispered.

"Of course, I am." Raph pushed himself to his feet.

Nico ran to the edge of the roof and jumped off, metal groaning as she landed solidly on the roof of the shellraiser. Donatello glanced back at Leo, “I guess I’ll be reinforcing that. Hey, wait, she’s trying to claw her way in.”

Mikey grabbed the pad Nico had dropped, “Van’s on the move again.”

“Hey, did they drop off Maki?” Honoka asked.

Rin, slumped, suddenly terrified for her bff.

“I’m going down there before she wrecks my custom mods,” Raph said and vaulted down to the car.

Leo frowned, “That’s a multi car crash waiting to happen.”

“Agreed.” Umi sheathed her sword at her back. “We may need your help. If we have to check out the building and follow the van.”

“And save the werewolf’s girlfriend.” Mikey grinned.

There was an angry howl.

“What did she say?” Donatello wondered.

“A lie.” Rin stood, ginger fur covering her as she did, but retaining her bipedal status. She sprinted, leapt into the air, and landed like a cat on the hood. Nico huffed.

“Nico thinks we don’t know they’re dating.” Honoka said.

“Ha! Like nobody knows April dating me.”

“That’s not what’s happening, Donnie.” Mikey was standing on the roof edge, watching the scene below, and he winced as a large noise happened. “Oh wow. The furball just crushed a dumpster with Raph.”

Leo was tumbling toward the ground, Donatello following, using his staff to vault, Umi paused briefly to calculate the arc and speed of the leap necessary to land her near Nico. Honoka was standing next to Mikey, throwing air punches in support of Nico’s attempts to rip through the Shellraiser’s roof.

Leo pulled out the keys, jumped into the vehicle, and started the ignition. Nico howled. Umi landed lightly on the hood and strode toward the window. Leo wondered briefly if she was going to kick her way through the windshield, but then remembered she wasn’t Raph or Mikey.

“Nico.” Umi snapped. “Get inside.”

Nico snarled, claws crunching dents into the metal of the roof.

“This is boss.” Honoka said as she and Rin jumped into the Shellraiser right after Mikey, Donnie, and Raph.

“Fine, stay on the roof." Umi closed the side door behind her. “Drive.”

###

Nishikino Maki woke up, headachey, sore, groggy, shoulder throbbing. Where was Nico? The last thing she’d heard was Nico calling her name. She could smell cedarr incense and wood and nothing familiar. Opening her eyes slightly, she took in details of the room. Antique Japanese screens, incense burners on low tables, floor to ceiling glass facing the night cityscape. She could hear several voices, but no actual words. She tugged at her hands. Tied. Ankles too. Not gagged, but she wouldn’t want to be drawing attention to herself until she had a plan. She closed her eyes again and concentrated. Fingers on her right hand altered, paw and claws replacing fingers. Claws were much much better for slashing through rope. As often as she’d cursed Rin’s clumsiness in accidentally biting her and then bounding off during Rin’s first full moon transformation, the time Maki'd been putting in working through the mental exercises Nico always ranted about was going to pay off now. Perhaps she could slip out of here before she was discovered or needed to use her wolf abilities in a fight. She’d done so well at keeping them a secret, even from Nico, who had wondered occasionally about different scent mixes coming from Maki, but when Maki said, “it’s because I’m in love,’ Nico had blushed, fake grumped, and never mentioned it again. Nico hadn’t replied that she was in love too, but there had been a few extra hip bumps when they walked home. Right now, Maki was content to wait. She got to spend most of her extra time with Nico, and occasionally catch the smoldering glow in Nico’s beautiful carmine eyes when she thought Maki was preoccupied with something else. Maki knew Nico thought she wasn’t smart or rich or…something enough for Maki, but Maki was going to patiently nudge Nico until her fiercely talented future wife got tired of underestimating herself. Or couldn’t resist Maki’s charms anymore. Grinning as she freed her wrists, Maki carefully moved her bared claws to free her ankles. Still the low rumble of conversation. Too many people to take on without backup, but maybe if she could manage to sneak…

And then the windows shattered. Maki recognized the growl and her instincts took over, inner wolf becoming fully outer wolf to rush to Nico’s side.

A/N: This is entirely the fault of the anonymous Tumblr ask who said "all of them are werewolves."Truth to tell, I have had a really really busy stressful month that included the death of my wife's father, along with all the lives lost to Covid-19 and American's evil beating heart pumping systemic racism. And I'd bought a TMNT mask for wearing in public spaces, so I was in a Turtle mood, and started watching the animated series and here we are. I was going for episode pacing, so this initial effort is a two parter. I also feel like my writing has been wrenched out of the zone by everything and I really really just want to finish something cute and fun and kickass.Take care. I appreciate all of you who've read and/or commented and/or written and/or kudoed to keep this Love Live corner of the universe lively.

#Love Live #Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #NicoMaki #Nishikino Maki #yazawa nico #etc.#will add more tags later #cheers

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jerrisdiction · 4 years ago

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Finding my voice

These days I fumbled with the thought of censoring my words, or even going back to re-edit my blog posts. But that itself goes against the spirit of jotting down genuine, original thoughts that I may have.

A lot of writing, or just creating anything would involve finding that voice, that message which we are trying to convey. That was probably how blogs arose - there were themes that each attempts to focus on, like a website. School life, beauty, food, travel - loads of them out there. I suppose people who don’t have a specific focus may still do well - some of them are influencers, and some readers read because it’s them.

For me, though, there are so many things which I want to write about. Never had I imagined this, until people actually told me that I write fairly well. Seriously? My lack of vocabulary always makes me give up in exasperation though. And I constantly swung between “I’m not original enough, I don’t feel like it’s my writing” and “my style is too bizarre or childish for anyone to appreciate, I should switch to a more acceptable, mature way of writing”. Not just writing, but also singing, editing photos - and lately with editing videos. Lately I struggle with wanting to delete my videos, simply because they seem so similar to the trending aesthetic vlogs. Those with cute fonts, borders, lo-fi/ calm/ cute background music, warm tones. See, I’ve watched enough of these vlogs to know what is popular. And sure more people are adopting similar styles from one another; sometimes we see comments like “oh your style reminds of haegreendal, it’s so calm and soothing” and they’d reply “thank you I’m honoured to hear that, she’s amazing!”. And that sort.

But thankfully I took some time to think about all these, and came to wonder - perhaps this is all about our need to share our lives with the world outside. It is pretty toxic at times. I remember those days I just wanted to tweet something funny or post a nice cover, to get loads of retweets and likes. It’s probably a phase which all of us would go through. Until we realise that fine line between sharing our lives simply because it’s worth sharing, and sharing our lives to gain that validation. As someone who grew up on validation and craved validation, it was no wonder I fell prey to this pretty easily. And that was partly why I kept deleting my accounts, moving from one platform to another - hoping to “make it big” somewhere online because I could no longer beg for that validation in real life.

That “online” persona of mine viewed my real-life persona as someone pathetic, because I was getting increasingly low-profile.

Only for me to gradually realise, that was actually what I really wanted deep down.

The question then, could be - is there anything worthy to write about then?

It comes back to the matter of doing things intrinsically. My friends told me to sing because I enjoy it, not because there is an audience; to write because I need to express and clear my thoughts, not because it is an art form or something whimsical that people need to appreciate. Hell, who appreciates rants? It reminds me of those among us, who create private accounts to rant or ramble. It sure felt a little comforting that your closer friends could view the posts and give some words of moral support. But sometimes when people admit that it feeds their ego a little (how, I cannot figure), that’s likely when it gets a little... Warped. The need for validation, once again.

Or perhaps, a fine balance has to lie between positioning oneself, and neglecting one’s uniqueness in order to fit in. Since a long time ago, we were taught to be prepared for that classic question - for that elevator speech. Tell them something unique about yourself, but also something acceptable. A blog description is more likely to say “Hi I’m xxx, I’m an avid traveller and camping enthusiast” than “Hi I blog about random things under the Sun”.

So yeah, it kind of confused me that people think I write well - when I frustrate over what to write about in the first place. It’s like how my teachers think my essays are mere fluff with no solid content. As someone in her early twenties, I can only admit that I have been through way, way less 'real’ experiences than those my age. And I used to shame myself for lacking in those - no hall life, no clubbing, no chilling at bars, no CCAs to keep me exhausted. I don’t read that much either. So yes, I considered myself an empty vessel who was constantly “hurting” from all the negativity.

But gradually, I came to reminisce of certain experiences which others may not have been through. Has the average Singaporean youth been up Singapore Quarry via a rocky mountain biking trail on foot? Got shocked by a pervert trying to take pictures of her legs? Travelled to Tuas to recce a stock count location? Wore matching shirts on her very first date with someone who later becomes her partner? Bought a ukulele in secret and had to hide it for 2 months before getting caught? Everyone has different experiences.

I feel like a tired old lady these days, but these are experiences that will keep me looking forward to more. So that when I truly become an old lady, there are stories that I would have in store to tell. Recounting these without trying to fear the negatives, without trying to glorify the positives. And maybe, that’s what I wish to embrace in my writing.

#jerringrambles

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travllingbunny · 6 years ago

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The 100 rewatch: 1x05 Twilight’s Last Gleaming

I’m a new fan of The 100, who first binged it last year, August to November. This is my first full rewatch of the show. I was planning to start it anyway and finish it before the season 6 premiere on April 30, and when I saw that Fox Serbia was airing a rerun (Monday to Friday, 40 min. after midnight, with repeats the next day), starting on 1st February, it was a great opportunity to start my rewatch in HDTV on my beautiful new TV. I decided to do write-ups and tag other fans on SpoilerTV website, as I did when I was first watching the show. But my posts turned into full blown essays. So, finally, after over a week, I’ve realized: Why don’t I post them on my Tumblr blog, too? I’ll copy my write-ups of the first 7 episodes, and then I’ll post my rewatch posts after I watch each episode. (The next one, 1x08, is on Monday’Tuesday.)

Spoilers below for all 5 seasons of the show. I go of on a tangents and make a lot of references to future events.

Rating: 8.5/10

This episode really shocked me and emotionally affected me back when I first watched, and it's when I first realized the show didn't pull punches.

Killing individual characters for shock value - that's nothing new, but killing a bunch of innocent people like that, having the audience expect throughout the episode for them to be saved at the last moment, and then instead they die anyway, when it could have been stopped... I really wasn't expecting that. Now it's far less shocking after you've seen The 100 use mass murder as a plot device multiple times. Well, this is not a murder, technically, since the people eventually volunteered for it to saved their loved ones. But before Abby decided to be seriously badass and show Jake's video to everyone and tell them the truth about the Ark dying, the 100 being sent to the ground, and the upcoming culling, the Council was planning to straight up murder 320 people and then lie about it, claiming it was an accident. And, as Clarke points out to Bellamy in this episode, it's certain that those would have been working class people rather than the Ark elite. The class issues the show keeps stressing is of those things that keep it from justifying the Ark leadership for their actions on the grounds of survival, tough choices, blah blah blah, and I'm glad for it. Jaha was here planning to be one of the people who died (but I bet a large part of the reason was because he thought his son was dead... which he was, just not for the reasons he thought), until Kane convinced him not to. They had a back and forth about who's the better leader, with Jaha arguing Kane had the strength to make tough choices, and Kane arguing later that Jaha was able to inspire people. And they were both kind of right, but not in the way they thought. Kane has changed a lot during the show, from pragmatist to idealist, from pessimist to optimist, but he's always been a guy who 100% believes in whatever course of action he's chosen, thinks it's right and throws himself into it, in a way that often comes off as a bit naive. But he does suck at winning the popular vote, going by the fact that he was never elected Chancellor and that he lost to Pike in S3. While Jaha somehow managed to get elected, bull&s.hits really well in a speech in episode 1x07, and in S4 we see him give speeches to the people for the benefit of Clarke and Bellamy that show how good he can be at swaying people, even when he's not in power. But S2-3 also showed the most awful version of his messianic complex and influence. Something else that has always bothered me about the culling is, we see people sacrifice themselves for their children (like Tor Lemkin for his daughter Reese) or their romantic partners (the guy who wants to do it for his wife), which is something we see multiple times in the show. But we don't see how their loved ones feel about it, whether they tried to stop them (Tor's daughter Reese didn't realize what was going on, but the adults did). How will Reese will about losing her father when she learns what he did, and that he did it for her? In the next episode, we see the husband of one of the victims in the culling in 1x07, and in S5 we learn Kara Cooper's father was one of the 320. I wonder how many of the people from the Ark that lost there loved ones are even alive by S6? This is also the episode that made me feel better about the Clarke/Finn/Raven love triangle, because it was dealt with much better than I expected. Another reason why this was a turning point when I was really on board with the show. Speaking of that love triangle - this show really loves the scenes where Clarke is shocked and hurt to find out someone has a girlfriend by seeing him reunite with her and kiss her. They did the exact same thing in S5. And both times the camera zooms on Clarke's face rather than on the couple, though in this case, they didn't go as far as to blur Finn and Raven out of focus. But these are two very different situations, of course. Among other things, because in S5, it was no one's fault, while this situation is fully Finn's fault. I've loved the way Clarke dealt with learning Finn had a girlfriend, absolutely not doing the "being catty and fighting over a guy" thing, but the exact opposite. She's heartbroken, but she immediately bottles it up. She clearly hates being the 'other woman' and her instinct when feeling unwanted is to completely withdraw. You know who definitely isn't dealing with it well? Finn. He's clearly uncomfortable as he wasn't expecting Raven to come, and then he goes to indicate to Clarke that he would like to continue a relationship with her, which she refuses... so he then goes back to Raven and acts like everything is fine, because if Clarke doesn't want him, why not stick with Raven, and has no intention of telling Raven that he slept with someone else, or that he's in love with Clarke or that he would like to be with Clarke. Just like he never thought it would be right to tell Clarke that he has a long-term girlfriend on the Ark. Speaking of relationships, but in this case, not very serious ones, one of Bellamy's friends with benefits we see him in bed with in this episode, Bree (the blonde one), is the same girl who came onto him and presumably had sex with him in season 4, while partying as one of Jasper's end-of-the-world suicide group, and who went on to be one of those who killed themselves. But I'd be lying if I said I would make that connection if I didn't see it on The 100 wiki. The other girl, Roma, ends up killed by the Grounders in 1x07. This was still the time when Bellamy was often acting in a very frustrating way - due to his narrow focus on just Octavia and himself and not yet the group as a whole or people in general - and massively screwing up things, and never more than in this episode, by stealing Raven's radio and throwing it in the water, so Jaha couldn't come down to execute him. Now, he did know about the Ark being on its last legs, but had no idea about the culling before Raven told everyone. I predicted at the time that we'll see Bellamy feeling super guilty later, since he doesn't outwardly show it much in this episode, and boy, did we see that in 1x08. (Much more than we ever did from Jaha, who was actually directly responsible for it, but that's what Jaha is like, always justifying his actions as necessary.). Here, Finn, Clarke and Raven confront Bellamy about the radio, and the former two learn about Bellamy shooting Jaha, while Bellamy learns Jaha survived, but with a massive difference between how Finn and Raven confront him and how Clarke does. The former two are basically like "You're the worst" and Finn calls him selfish, while Clarke - already at this point - seems to understand him better and have a much better opinion of him: "You're not a murderer. All you have done is to protect your sister", though she then gets angry at him a bit later, asking if he even cares that he caused the deaths of 320 people. It's so weird that the flares the 100 use to signal the Ark won't help at all (the Ark leaders, aside from Abby, will just dismiss them), but will end up burning a Grounder village and cause more conflict with the Grounders. Which is so consistent with Murphy's Law - not the episode or John Murphy, but actual Murphy's Law - whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. But just to be clear, the Grounders using that to justify their war was utter bullcrap. There's no way anyone intelligent could consider the 100 an invading force (LOL) after seeing what they were like (and we know they did: Lincoln was spying on them and making notes) and anyone who's not a small child knows that people can't be considered guilty for causing things by complete accident, which they never could have predicted happening. (I just had to have that mini-rant because people who try to portray both sides as equally responsible, or even demonize the Delinquents and/or excuse the Grounders, get on my nerves, a lot.) A minor-running theme in this episode: at the beginning of the episode, when Clarke and Finn are lying together in the afterglow, before their super-brief relationship came came to a crushing end after Raven came back, Finn - always the one saying romantic things - mentioned a falling star and making a wish, which Clarke was initially confused by, since she just thought of meteors in real world terms and didn't know about that old superstition, while Finn said he had read about it. At the end of episode (in a moment I've seen in a few Tumblr gifsets!), when everyone is watching the flares, Clarke and Bellamy are looking at them together and she asks "What would you wish on a falling star" and then assumes Bellamy wouldn't understand what she's talking about. But she obviously does (the guy has read a lot), since he says "I don't even know what I would wish for". Which is probably true, and sad - I imagine that he had never given any serious thought to what he actually wanted out of life, beyond "Protect Octavia - make sure she is not discovered." Of course, the scene was also an occasion to show Clarke looking sadly at Finn and Raven, so we'll know she's actually really heartbroken and pining. There's more pining from Clarke in the next couple of episodes, and after that, IIRC, fortunately barely any. BTW, let's just take in the fact that Clarke, in all 5 seasons, has never actually properly dated anyone, or specifically, she had one friend with benefit with no stronger feelings involved, and she had the two romantic relationships (with people she had known for a few weeks. and who both relentlessly pursued her romantically and made the first moves) which lasted a few hours each and consisted of having sex exactly once, but were portrayed as epic romances, where 95% of the overall relationship, in both cases, consisted of not dating, but a lot of angst, betrayal, and ended in death, and Clarke getting traumatized and feeling guilty (without actually it being her fault). It's amazing how similar overall her relationships with Finn and Lexa are, including in how much they lasted and how much focus they had on screen and for how long, but one is almost completely forgotten and ignored by the fandom now, while the other one is over-hyped.

#The 100 #the 100 rewatch #the 100 1x05 #Twilight's Last Gleaming #clarke griffin #bellamy blake #raven reyes #thelonius jaha #marcus kane #abby griffin

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textsfromumbridge · 7 years ago

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Can you do the second reunited au with the singer for Enjonine? :D

“this is so unfair there’s this song getting popular and the singer sounds like you and all these lyrics almost sound like they could be about me but you’re singing about lost love and you weren’t in love with me wait I’m watching the music video and crying and hey that’s definitely you wtf” au

(for you, always, even doing this TWICE because my laptop fucked up and closed the wrong thing and made me lose EVERYTHING)

…

Her arms are held tightly behind her back by a burly security guard, while his comrade talks into a walkie. It leaves her free to kick at him, but she doesn’t appear to be doing much damage to him, seeing as he’s a head taller and about three or four times her weight.

“This is a violation of my rights,” she hollers as loudly as she possibly can. “I didn’t do anything and then mister Gorilla just grabbed me.”

How she ended up like this? Well, that is quite a story.

This whole thing started back in freshman year of high school, when she had a stupid crush on her old neighbor Marius. He’d just always been nice to her even when everything went to shit.

Not the point.

So, to make him notice her, she started hanging out with his friends, all guys and most of them pretty damn cute. And she figured, why not make Marius jealous by hanging out with these boys and talking to them and maybe doing a little flirting?!

Well, it only worked with one guy. The only times Marius ever got annoyed was when she talked to Gabriel, the friend Marius only referred to as Enjolras.

The first time she backed Gabriel up in a discussion, Marius about had a coronary before dragging Eponine off to lecture her about how Enjolras was a bad influence and she should not be hanging out with him.

These guys were surprisingly hostile towards each other for people who were considered friends. They yelled at each other about most everything, from general political theory to popular culture to the merits of Napoleon. Gabriel usually made more sense than Marius, but she was never going to say that to her stupid crush.

So she continued to side with Gabriel (when he wasn’t blatantly wrong about everything), figuring that Marius would soon figure out that he was just jealous of Eponine’s support and attention. She continued to think that until Marius showed up with a pretty blonde girlfriend Eponine recognized from a girl she’d been in a group home with after the first time her parents got arrested.

She didn’t get along with the little bird then, and she knew that was not going to change - Marius was already lost to her.

But by then she’d actually started to like Gabriel as a person. He was her friend, even though he was the epitome of a rich, privileged white boy and there was no way their worlds were supposed to collide like this.

Still, he made sure to listen to her point of view, and he did not try to force any charity on her and her siblings. Most of the kind things he tried to do for them were framed as being a part of a decent friendship, and she let him do that - because there had been many a time when she’d hidden him from a debutant his parents were desperate to set him up with.

His parents were terrible elitist snobs and she occasionally wondered how they even managed to spawn such a sincere son - until she realized what a terrifying force of nature Gabriel could be. All for the sake of a better world, of course.

The friendship lasted all through high school, but by senior year her now best friend started keeping secrets and keeping his distance from her. Clearly he’d figured out that she’d started having not so platonic feelings for him and was trying to let her down gently and with her dignity intact.

When they went to colleges on opposite sides of the country, the damage was already done. He’d helped her so much with applications and scholarships, but they couldn’t manage to bring their friendship back to where it used to be.

She hadn’t seen him in six years, not since that dreadful Thanksgiving sophomore year of college, and while she did miss the boy he used to be quite terribly, she’d managed without him. Even though that stupid crush had never quite gone away completely.

That and her college friend Chetta, while amazing, could not quite replace her Gabe. And he was hers, in a lot of the ways that mattered - that nickname was hers and hers alone. But now, after six years? There was no telling how many boys and girls would have been allowed to call him that over the years.

Even though she definitely worked with a big part of their target demographic, she’d barely heard of Les Amis de L’ABC - only to understand the French pun inherent in their name (her high school fosters had taught her that language). But they were obviously a boyband, so she hadn’t actually bothered with the band members or the songs.

Until fourteen year old Claire, one of her favorite clients and a big fan of the Amis, had a terrible day and all she wanted was to listen to her favorite band with her social worker. Eponine figured she could tune out for most of it - she’d put herself through a lot if it helped her kids.

And then Claire played the first song, the latest single “The First To Fall”. It seemed slightly different than the average boyband fair, but it was obviously still a love song - it had to be.

When the lead singer started to sing, Eponine just about choked on air. It sounded like him, like that time in junior year when he revealed that he was actually quite the singer and he made her blush by crooning a classic in the secrecy of her bedroom.

“Is something wrong?” Claire was always astute.

“Just a bit of a cough,” Eponine tried really hard to sound casual. “Just start again at the beginning.”

Claire listened well, for once, and Eponine steeled herself. She just had to get through this one song without choking on the memories of a high school crush and her first real love. She could do that.

Until she heard the lyrics to the chorus: “I was the first to fall / you built your barricade / I fight here in your name / feelings won’t be betrayed”.

Feelings? How did this song sound so much like him, like them? How did this singer manage to sing her high school experience back to her?

It couldn’t be!

“So, what did you think?” Claire asked.

“Not bad for a boyband,” Eponine shrugged.

Of course, Claire considered that very high praise from her usually so stoic social worker, and pulled up the music video, just to torture Eponine some more. Oh, she wasn’t doing it on purpose, but Eponine really did start to believe in karma at that point.

She obviously deserved this pain.

Ferre was the first one she recognized, dorky glasses exchanged for a model that was a little more hip, and his pin straight hair styled into a messy just out of bed look. He’d come a long way from the geek he was in high school, unlike Courf, who looked basically the same as he did back then.

And then the screen was filled with Gabriel Enjolras himself.

That and a single ticket to an almost sold-out concert is what led her to this point, being held by Burly Security Dude right at the entrance to the backstage area.

“I just need to talk to Gabriel,” she is trying to explain to Walkie Guy. “I went to high school with these idiots. You can just tell him Eponine is here.”

Burly Guy continues to have a tight hold on her hands, and she knows that there will be bruises. She is not a fangirl, but clearly they think she is out here for nefarious reasons.

It should make her happy that Gabe and the boys are so well-protected, but right now she just sees it as a giant annoyance. She is someone they actually know, and someone Gabe will actually want to see - or so she hopes.

“I promise to leave if he won’t see me,” she vows. “I’d cross my heart and hope to die but I’m losing feeling in my hands.”

That finally loosens Burly’s grip, and he actually appears to look a little guilty as he sees the state of her wrists. She would feel triumphant if she wasn’t exhausted and in pain, but at least Walkie is finally trying to get in touch with Gabriel for her.

She waits for only a minute or so, but it feels like three days.

“Apparently she’s cool,” Walkie only seems slightly skeptical. “You can follow the PA and he’ll take you straight to Mr. Enjolras.”

With some muttering about how he isn’t aware Mr. Enjolras even has a first name, Burly holds the door open for her. The PA boy - is he even old enough to buy his artists alcohol? - is already waiting for her, motioning for her to follow him down a partly lit hallway.

There’s a door at the end of the hall, and just like the last one it is opened for her. The PA waits for her to enter the room before closing it behind her, leaving her in a dressing room with just… Gabe!

“Eponine,” his voice is deeper than it used to be as it wraps around her name.

His blond hair is longer than the spikier look he had in high school - he looks more like Danny Zuko now than he did in their version of the musical. There are hints of laughter lines around his bright eyes, and it looks like he finally filled out his formerly gangly form.

But his bright smile is somehow exactly the same - it even has the same butterfly-inducing effect.

“Gabe,” she almost whispers.

He hears her, judging by how his smile gets impossibly wider. He’s pretty much giving the Joker a run for his money at this point.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” he breathes.

Before she can say another word, he pulls her in close for a hug that isn’t quite like the ones they used to share. The smell she breathes in is similar but not quite the same, but her head still ends up snuggling into his neck business.

Oh, she still remembers that ridiculous rant fondly.

Just when she relaxes in his arms, her arms having rediscovered their old familiar place around his waist, he pulls away slightly. They are no longer hugging, but he still pulls her into his side.

“I missed you,” he is somehow still smiling.

Can they really just slip right back into a friendship after six years of nothing, and does she even want that? Sure, she’d be lucky if he still wants to be her friend, but after that song she’s wondering if maybe, just maybe, there is more still in the cards for them.

“You were in love with me?” she has to ask about the song.

It’s been going through her head ever since she heard that damn song - he did have feelings for her then. Unless it’s all for the song, but she doubts that. He never used to be that kind of guy.

Gabe has always been open and genuine about his feelings - except for senior year. She thought it had been about her crush - but maybe not.

“You didn’t know?” Gabe appears stunned.

“Of course I didn’t know you felt the same way,” she is exhausted and the words just slip out.

He freezes briefly, and then he presses a soft kiss into her hair.

“We’re idiots,” he mutters.

“Not so much anymore,” she grins as she finally pulls him down to kiss her.

#hihiyas #enjonine #enjolras x eponine #you are my revolution #my stories #I'm so glad it's done #I don't want to write this a third time

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kill-it-with-an-x-burner · 7 years ago

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Fairy Tale (Chuunibyou!Izuku)

Basically, I just wanted to have an excuse to write Chuunibyou!Izuku at some point in my life. This is an experimental fic that I did on a whim so who knows if I pick this story up again at some point. (This is a one-shot btw.)

I wrote this in one sitting so pardon me for any spelling/grammatical errors and incoherent babbles.

Summary: As a child, Izuku had always been off in his own world. So when he gets a quirk fueled by his imagination, his personality takes a rather odd turn.

Izuku has been coming home late recently.

Normally, it wouldn't be too suspicious since most kids his age often got caught up playing with their friends outside. However, Izuku wasn't like them— he preferred to stay inside and read story books or watch hero videos all day. He'd rather sit at one spot for hours on end.

But nowadays, he looked completely exhausted; like he constantly ran a marathon every day. At times, he's covered in bruises and scrapes. She wasn't blind to his limps and minute flinches, either.

She even caught Izuku having long, one-sided conversations with himself. Izuku has always been a unusual child who spoke and acted differently from other kids, but he had never done anything like that before.

Inko thought that it might be his quirk— that her child may be seeing something that's not there, but the doctor said that it wasn't the case. Izuku may not have an extra joint, but her son's quirk is still dormant. "Perhaps it's just his imagination," the doctor said.

Yes, she was told it was normal for kids around Izuku's age to have imaginary friends, but she can't help but worry. Being extremely introverted at a young age wasn't healthy. I mean, the only friend he had that wasn't imaginary was Katsuki— and that was only because Katsuki is her friend's son!

It was why Inko resolved to get her son to talk. Did he prefer to be alone because kids picked on him at school? Why has he been returning home late? Was there anything she could help with?

As his mother, she wanted to know.

"You know you can tell me anything, right?" She said, gesturing at her son to sit beside her. "These couple of weeks, you've been coming home tired and injured. Are you being bullied? What's going on?"

He froze like a child caught pilfering from the cookie jar. He began to fidget and stammer, trying to explain his situation. "I-I-It's nothing like that, I just—"

"I know that kids have been picking on you for being quirkless, okay? You shouldn't have to put up with them, Izuku! Just because you don't have a quirk doesn't give them an excuse to—"

"M-Mom, you've got it all wrong," Izuku interrupted her rant. He then mumbled something under his breath.

Wait, what? Did she hear that right? "Can you repeat that?" When he opened his mouth to speak again, she noticed that his bottom lip was trembling. "Louder, this time. I'm not mad. Calm down."

Izuku sighed. "...I have a quirk."

"You do?" Why this was wonderful news! He's always aspired to be a hero like All Might, and now he finally awakened his ability. "That's great and all, but what's it got to do with your bruises? And why haven't you told me yet?"

Her son looked as if he was about to cry. Knowing him, he probably was at any moment now. "I wanted to surprise you on your birthday tomorrow! All the other kids have flashy ones! I've been training my quirk so you to be proud of me..."

Inko hugged her son. "Oh, honey, it doesn't matter to me what quirk you have. I'll always be proud of you." Thank god for that. The woman was glad she was mistaken. Heaven knows what she'd do if her son was truly ostracized by his peers.

She clasped his hands. "Then, can your dear old mother see her wonderful son's equally wonderful quirk?" Izuku nodded excitedly. His mom wanted to see his quirk, even if it's not as eye-catching as Kacchan!

He trotted a few feet away from her. Her son took a deep breath and closed his eyes. A light green aura enveloped his body as a glowing circle appeared in front of him. Wind gathered and circulated in one spot until she could make out a shadow. In a split second, he opened his eyes and spread out his arms. "Fairy Sylph, come on out!"

Much to Inko's wonder, an actual fairy emerged from the wind. She had light green eyes and matching hair. Her heart-shaped face was framed by two, feather-like bangs and elongated ears. The tiny creature's body was covered from neck to toe with feathers of varying shades of green; arranged in such a way that it looked like a dress. Finally, on her back were delicate butterfly wings that glittered with every movement.

She was ethereal; downright gorgeous.

Inko felt like a little girl all over again.

"You shouldn't be sad about your quirk. This is incredible! I've never heard of someone summoning a fairy befo— IZUKU!" Inko panicked. Her son was lying down on the floor, unmoving. She carried him in her arms and began fanning him with her other hand.

The freckled boy held out a shaky hand to her. His mouth trembled as he spoke to his mother, "Calling Sylph is really tiring, mom... it's why I've... been practicing. Didn't wanna... keep passing out every time..."

"Izuku, I know you're excited and all but please don't push yourself too hard. It's a great quirk, but I don't want your health to suffer because of it."

A few hours later, her son already recovered. It wasn't anything life-threatening, but his quirk was extremely taxing on his stamina. Ever since that day, she helped her son harness his quirk so he wouldn't be too exhausted every single time he uses his quirk. In turn, her son was able to summon without collapsing and often went home with a tiny spirit companion or two.

For quite some time, Inko believed that he can only summon small creatures like Sylph and the azure-colored animal that tagged along during their trips to the grocery.

Then one day...

"I'm home!"

She went to the doorway to greet Izuku. "Welcome ba—" Inko dropped her ladle in shock. Her eyes widened incredulously as she stared at the creature behind her son. She raised a quivering finger at it. "W-W-W-Wha...!"

The freckled boy was lying down on the doorway. Izuku beamed at her as he tiredly patted the enormous, reptilian snout beside him, which was blocking the entire entrance. Smoke steadily leaked from the sides of its mouth as it let out a deep, throaty growl. She heard faint screams from outside.

Inko almost had a heart attack.

"Izuku!"

There was a reason why Izuku was her favorite of them all.

Obaa-sama, as many in the family addressed her, was the stern and strict matriarch of the Midoriya family who ruled over them with an iron fist. She may not be able to burn everything down like her husband, but she was incredibly intimidating and a figure of authority in their bloodline.

Contrary to popular belief, it was she and not her husband, who held the power in the family. She was the one who entered public service and eventually, the military. She was the one who went to the frontlines against the vilest of villains, whilst her husband stayed home to protect their children. She was the one who fought against the oppression against the quirk users. She was the one who brought prestige and honor to their family.

Thus, her word is law.

Much to her dismay, none of her children became like her. No one entered public service— no heroes, no policemen, no soldiers, no anything. They all settled for mundane jobs and thankless careers. Not to mention that no one bothered to at least hone their abilities. The powerful quirks they were blessed with were utterly wasted on them.

To rub salt into the wound, none of her children were able to inherit her quirk. Instead, they took after her husband's stronger quirk, and her grandchildren and great-grandchildren were no different. They either inherited fire or from their other parents who had equally strong and impressive abilities. If she, with her unconventional quirk was able to make a difference and bring honor to their family, then surely, those with better quirks can do the same if not better, right?

Honestly, her descendants were hopeless.

That is, until Inko, the wife of her youngest grandson, brought Izuku.

The child wasn't anything impressive— scrawny, clumsy, and soft-spoken. He cried easily, bruised easily from tripping everywhere, and for some time, he had been declared quirkless. She thought that he would be another failure in a long line of failures.

But then, it all changed on Izuku's fifth birthday.

The once thought quirkless child actually had a quirk. And not just any old ability, it was hers; he inherited her quirk. She was happy. Finally, someone in the family took after her! Not to mention that he had a more powerful version of hers and was ambitious enough to want to be a hero. This was the perfect opportunity.

"You're special, Izuku. You're the next hope of this family," She spoke as she petted his head. "Remember, every one of us is counting on you to restore our reputation."

Obaa-sama began to treat Izuku differently from the others. It was obvious to them that she regarded him with favoritism and many of their relatives were jealous that he was the one getting attention from the bitter old hag; that he's the one most likely to become head of the family in the future.

From then on, Izuku was convinced that he's meant for something more.

Izuku hadn't let praise and special treatment get to his head like Kacchan, however, it did lead to him developing a rather... odd personality.

The Midoriya matriarch was too blinded by the prospect of reputation that she never noticed anything, but the rest of the Midoriya family saw and knew all too well what was happening to the kid. It didn't help that his quirk thrived from it, either.

Obaa-sama's influence was fueling Izuku's delusions.

Oh, boy.

All Might was no stranger to eccentricities.

In the hero community, you interact with people from all sorts of backgrounds— and this meant meeting the more... colorful of the bunch; himself included among them.

But never has he met anyone stranger than the young man before him.

"I have anxiously waited for this day; the day that Obaa-sama has foretold— the arrival of my destiny." The green-haired boy covered his left eye with a trembling hand. It was briefly reminiscent of another hero he saw posing on live television. "To think that it would be you of all people... that you and I meet must be a fate decided by the world itself."

The man had been chasing a slime villain earlier. He barely made it in time to rescue the kid from being suffocated and taken over by said criminal. When he woke the kid up, All Might was taken aback because the boy he saved spaced out only to instantly burst in joy. For a moment, the man swore he saw sparkles appearing in the background.

The boy then directed his gaze at him. He expected the boy to thank him or something—

"I-I summoned you, didn't I, Sir All Might?"

—not this.

"Summon? What do you mean?" He scratched his head in confusion.

Predictably, the child ignored his query and went off to a tangent.

"Of course, I would summon you. I'm the best in the world. Obaa-sama even said that my quirk is more advanced; that I could summon any being! Ah, but wait. I can only summon spirits, not living people." He paled fast. "Oh, no. This is bad. This is really, really bad. If I summoned him, does this mean that Sir All Might is... is..."

The man felt dread settle in his stomach. The boy looked like he was about to cry. He jumped in surprise when the boy yelled out of the blue. "NO, THIS CAN'T BE TRUE!"

(What kind of kid did he rescue?)

However, who could have imagined that this eccentric, crybaby young man reminded him of what it means to be a hero: that heroes risked their lives to fight villains and protect the citizens.

His fists still quaked at the reminder of his momentary weakness.

Due to his carelessness, the slime villain was able to break free from his temporary container and captured another child whilst he idled by because he had reached his limit. Meanwhile, the kid fearlessly dove into danger, claiming that his body moved on its own.

At that moment, he was more heroic than any of the heroes.

It wasn't as if he charged in recklessly, either. His movements in confronting the criminal were clearly given thought; he crouched down low so he wouldn't be too noticeable and hurled his bag towards the villain's eyes.

This kid had what it takes to be a true hero. The only problem was...

"What's your name?"

The kid extended his arm in a melodramatic fashion. "I am Midoriya Izuku! Thy calling is that of a summoner, whose life is guided by and dedicated to the Sacred Guardian Spirits!"

(He has to give props to the kid— he already has a hero's dramatic flair done perfectly.)

"Ah, I see. You have been rendered speechless by your sudden arrival in an unknown location. You see, in my darkest moments, I sought out the strongest spirit in the world to battle against the forces of evil. Hence, I was able to call upon you."

He shrugged his shoulders. "Alas, it is unfortunate that you have passed on to the next plane of existence. But fear not, for I will peer into the ultimate abyss with you!"

...Somehow, the kid thought he was already dead. All Might sighed in exasperation. I guess, seeing my true form just made it worse.

He didn't know if this kid would be a viable candidate to be the next successor of One For All, but he did know that Izuku was plenty heroic and his heart was in the right place. He just has a... peculiar speech pattern and mannerisms that can put people off.

For instance, he refers to himself as the prince of a fictional kingdom and views heroes as some sort of honorable warriors or chivalrous knights. Villains aren't merely villains to him; he calls them all sorts of titles: tyrants, overlords, evil witches; you name it.

(All Might has seen this kind of phenomenon before, back when he was a student. He had a classmate with a reptilian quirk who firmly believed that he had a mysterious dragon force sealed in his left arm. He often proclaimed that he was a Dragonborn warrior.

What did kids call it these days— chuunibou? Chuuniban?)

Surprisingly, when he offered to admit him to Yuuei as a recommended student, the kid refused out of some sense of honor and fair play. He wanted to get into the school the old-fashioned way: pass the entrance exam. Although, he's going to be a piece of work; the kid was clumsy and totally unathletic.

His quirk was something else, though. To have the power to summon creatures that mostly exist in fiction... he can see where his student's imagination was coming from.

When asked about how he awakened his ability, Izuku only answered, "I have stared into the darkness, and the darkness has stared back. In my journey of self-discovery, I was able to call upon the beings of the universe!" He then gestured to the fairy sitting on top of his head. "Sylph, the Noble Spirit of the Healing Wind, is merely the first of many to have deemed me worthy of their power!"

(This was Izuku-speak for, "I was just hanging out somewhere when I accidentally activated my quirk. I summoned a fairy. Isn't that cool?"

All Might didn't know whether to be dismayed or impressed with himself that he's gotten used to his student's speech pattern and quickly understood what he was trying to say.)

The next ten months wouldn't be boring at all, that's for sure.

Iida Tenya was a person of principle and discipline.

Above all else, he wanted to be like his older brother, the Turbo Hero, Ingenium. He had always admired Tensei not only for his exceptional physical capabilities, but also for being someone who genuinely desired to help others. He was a paragon of virtue who would stand for his ideals, no matter what.

And today was his first step towards becoming that kind of person.

Up to this point, he was slightly disappointed by his peers. Many of them were clearly in for the hero industry due to fame or fortune— he could already see it with their actions and behavior. They were taking it as a game, making bets over who got more points compared to the others.

However, the one who disappointed him the most was the curly-haired kid.

Not only was he disruptive with his constant mumbling, he treated the entire thing like an otaku circus act. He was wearing the most outlandish garb he'd ever seen: a sequined All Might-themed top hat with large protruding attachments mimicking the hero's hair and a black high-collared cape over his green tracksuit.

He looked absolutely ridiculous.

In addition to that, he had the audacity to prance around as if he owned the place and even attempted to sabotage their fellow examinees. Only the lowest of the low would consider such a thing. What a disgrace.

With such a horrendous first impression and after berating the kid himself, he didn't expect to work with him at all.

As the zero pointer destroyed the surrounding infrastructure and loomed over to attack them, everyone made a run for it. He was no different. He heard someone calling for attention, but paid no mind to it as he continued to flee the scene.

"Hey, I said. Sir Engine Legs!"

To his surprise, a green light blocked his way. Iida halted his dash, barely avoided hitting the small creature. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he stared at it. It was a fairy— a tiny fairy that was giving him a harsh glare.

He then noticed a light tug on his sleeve. He glanced to his side and felt irritation when he gazed at the strange curly-haired boy from before. The fairy was now sitting on top of the other's head. His lips pursed and curled into a slight sneer as he spoke to him with a harsh, stern voice, "What do you want? Don't tell me that you're planning on sabotaging even in this conditi—"

"You are mistaken! I am not so dishonorable as to put down our temporary comrades. I know you dislike me, but hear me out." The boy interrupted. He pointed in the direction of the gimmick robot. "I saw a young maiden trapped underneath the rubble over there." Iida's eyes widened. It was true, he saw a vague brown-colored shape in the distance. The robot was still some ways off, but if she doesn't get out of there in time, she could end up crushed.

"I'm not strong enough to lift the rubble or fast enough to get there in time, and to our misfortune, the mechanical golem is quickly approaching. I could destroy it, but it would be for naught since she might get caught in the crossfire." The kid scratched the back of his head. "If you get the lady out of there, I can take down the enemy for good."

Taking down the robot to show off? And what is with that speech pattern? "You do realize that it's not worth any points, right?"

The boy's face twisted into an angry expression. "It's not about the points. It's about helping her!"

As much as Iida abhorred the boy's previous conduct, this was no time to argue with him out of personal differences. The curly-haired kid was right; it is more important to help others than to squabble over petty things.

"All I have to do is run, right?" Iida flexed his legs. "You better not get any funny ideas."

He made an offended sound. "Of course not! Retrieve the maiden at all costs. I shall begin my incantation." Green aura covered his entire body as the atmosphere became heavier with each passing second. "O black omen hidden within the depths of the universe, spread your wings as you grace us with your divine presence..."

The curly-haired kid was downright bizarre. Iida blinked dumbfoundedly at the sight before shaking his head. No need to get distracted now. He activated his quirk and braced himself for the run. Any mistake could lead to the girl getting severely hurt.

"Wahh, it's coming!" The girl screamed in terror.

(In her panic, Uraraka Ochako had forgotten to make the rubble float off from her.)

In one massive leap, he zoomed across the street to her side. Iida focused intense energy on his leg and with all his might, he unleashed a kick to break away the large stone over her; creating a wide arc of sheer force that shattered it into tiny pieces. His actions caught the robot's attention and it went after them straightaway.

Just when they thought they still had time to get away, the gimmick machine's movement speed accelerated. It's crazy fast! Is Yuuei trying to get their applicants killed?! Iida thought.

Before the girl could even get a word in edgewise, Iida immediately carried her into his arms and ran for it. He furrowed his eyebrows when he saw the curly-haired kid still muttering. A bead of sweat trickle down his temple, and he felt his stomach dropped in fear. What is he doing? We're going to get crushed at this rate!

Iida had just run past him, when the curly-haired kid smirked. He raised his arms. "In the name of the summoner, I evoke your name," The sky darkened and the clouds swirled. An enormous circle filled with unintelligible scribbles and symbols appeared in the midst of it. "Come forth!"

What happened next shattered everything Iida knew about quirks. In his shock, his grip on the girl slackened and accidentally dropped her as both of their jaws dropped. Many other applicants in the distance also stopped running to gape at what happened.

"WHAT THE HECK IS THAT?!"

A large, black thing emerged from the heavens. It bellowed a mighty roar so powerful, it sent shockwaves on all sides. With every movement, the creature sent debris flying as it was too large for the street. Buildings collapsed and debris flew everywhere as it went on a rampage, tearing down everything in its path.

The zero pointer was no different. In one fell swoop of its tail, the robot went down. It then proceeded to breathe some sort of plasma from its mouth and destroyed the rest of the infrastructure and all other robots in the vicinity. After it wreaked havoc, it seemed to circle around to check if there was anything it missed. Somehow satisfied with its destruction, the creature disappeared in a burst of light.

(The curly-haired kid summoned a dragon. What the hell.)

Understandably, everyone was silent as Present Mic announced that the test was over. Nobody paid attention to the medics that came in, either.

Once upon a time, there was a kingdom established in the land of the rising sun.

The kingdom began as a small community founded by a farmer named Midoriya. He gathered all the other farmers that he knew to join him and help each other manage their farms. Under his rule, they flourished— what was a quaint little community now transformed into a bustling town. He then passed on the position to his only son, who also made their town thrive. The farmer's son would then pass it on to his own son, and so on and so forth.

As time passed, it continued to grow and grow and grow; from a community to a humble village to a boisterous city, and eventually, a kingdom was born. With the birth of a new kingdom was the establishment of a dynasty, and no one opposed the reign of the Midoriya family.

Like his predecessors, King Hisashi was just and kind. With his fair wife, Queen Inko, and his beloved son, Prince Izuku, the kingdom had many prosperous years during their reign— everyone was happy and content. It was why the people loved them dearly.

And it is also why they were utterly devastated when the king went missing.

One day, he just left and never came back. He abandoned his kingdom and his family to rot along with them. The queen and the prince grieved, and the people felt betrayed. The kingdom would have been in shambles without a leader. However, not all hope was lost. Because although the king has abdicated the throne, Queen Inko took a stand and became the new ruler. She picked up her husband's slack and lead the people as if the king never left.

Prince Izuku, who was expected to be lonely and bitter and loathing towards his father, was fairly unaffected by his absence. He moved on from his grief and remained a happy child. This was only thanks to his mother's guidance and the presence of his dearest friend, Kacchan.

Kacchan, as affectionaly named by Izuku, was the only son of Queen Inko's friend; the Duchess Bakugou Mitsuki. He was a precocious little thing who was both endearing and annoying. The duchess's young son was raised to be humble, but the commoners regarded him on a pedestal. He grew arrogant and developed a nasty case of inferiority superiority complex.

For all his arrogance, however, Kacchan was a figure of power and charisma— the picture of victory. It was why the other children followed his lead, and why Izuku admired him.

Both of them bonded over succeeding their parents and their dream of becoming a great knight like All Might. All Might was a legendary knight hailed for his numerous deeds. Despite his unknown identity, the people looked up to him. He was what every child aspired to be; a hero.

In a world of superhumans, Quirks were highly valued by society and knighthood was no different. Protecting the kingdom and the people would involve dangers of varying degrees. It was why the greater Quirk that a person possessed, the greater their chances of becoming a knight.

Izuku wanted to be a competent king who could not only rule, but also protect.

However, fate was unkind; he was rejected before he could even make something out of himself.

While children his age were discovering and developing their Quirks, Izuku has not shown any signs of having one. Out of worry for her child, Inko brought Izuku to the royal doctor.

"It's best you give up," The healer announced, pointing at a diagram of the bone structure of Izuku's foot. "The young prince is turning five soon and has yet to show any indication of his ability. He may not have an extra joint, but I concur that it's too late for him to develop anything at this point."

He was proclaimed Quirkless— a one-way ticket to becoming a social pariah. Many people viewed quirklessness as an undesirable mutation, and being the royal prince did not make him immune to their criticisms. Izuku, at the tender age of four, already knew that. But as long as he had his mother and Kacchan, he can take anything.

"You're a quirkless loser," Kacchan declared the next day. "Who'd wanna hang out with a weak Deku like you?"

He heard something shatter.

Maybe it was the glass he dropped. Maybe it was the bone in his arm after the bullies stomped on it.

Maybe it was his tender heart left broken in pieces due to Kacchan's heartless words.

Inko, witnessing his descent from a bright young boy to a melancholic child, knew she had to do something to cheer him up. The queen decided that if her child would not have any inherent ability, she would teach him magic. But she would not settle down with just any spellbook; she wanted only the best for her son, after all.

The queen gathered her most trusted warriors, saddled her loyal steed, and departed in search of a tome said to contain powerful spells (That would be 1500¥, ma'am," The clerk said.). She and her entourage was successful and thus, she returned from her journey giving the tome to Izuku.

"This is a tome filled to the brim with a wide array of spells. It takes a lot of responsibility to handle it," Inko spoke gently to her son as he hung on to her every word. "Perhaps you can't be a knight like All Might, but I know you can be something else just as great."

The young boy held onto the tome like a lifeline. He then hugged his mother tightly and thanked her profusely. "You're the best mom ever."

"I'm you're only mom," She joked.

Since then, Izuku spent his days reading the tome and memorizing every page to the last detail. He didn't want to waste the opportunity given to him by his mother. He quickly learns that it was not just a mere spellbook— it was also an autobiography detailing rituals involved in summoning spirits and monsters.

It was penned by a gifted sorcerer in the days of yore. They spoke of their travels through various places across the land. The boy was instantly fascinated by their tales. In fact, he had been so enraptured by them that he decided to try the casting spells on his own.

Though he may not have a talent for spellwork, Izuku discovered that he had a penchant for summoning. On his first try, he was able to call upon a tiny wind spirit called Sylph. He was spellbound by the mesmerizing beauty of the fairy that his mother caught him practicing magic without supervision. It was how she came to know his newfound skill.

His mother forbade him from summoning greater spirits for his body may not handle the strain. This doesn't deter him from trying time and time again. He didn't want to stay a powerless Deku any longer.

One tale in particular caught the prince's eye. The sorcerer claimed to have called upon the Dragon King, whom they tried to form a contract with. However, the dragon rejected them and sent them away with a large burst of its flames.

Izuku immediately knew that this was the summon meant for him.

Without telling anyone, he sets off to prepare the ritual to summon the Dragon King. Izuku went to the forest for his next deed. The young prince looked around to check if anyone followed him. Satisfied that he got away undetected, he then began the ritual.

"O ancient wyrm, ruler of the sky... hear my plea," He chanted while his body glowed with raw magic. There wasn't really any guarantee that it would work since the sorcerer noted there weren't any specific words to summon it, only that he had to mention its name; but this was the king of the dragons. If he wanted a pact, he had to treat a summoned being with respect.

"I, Midoriya Izuku, calls upon thee, Bahamut!"

A large magic circle appeared in the sky. The clouds darkened and strong bouts of wind enveloped the area. Izuku felt like he was going to be blown away. He dug his feet onto the soil, held onto a tree, and held his ground.

Suddenly, there was a crash above him, followed by another, and another— trees were knocked down with loud crashes. Branches, not just a few, but pretty much all of them fell as a pitch-black shape blocked his entire view above.

He then felt something poke his back. Izuku turned around, only to see enormous reptilian eyes looking back at him. The dragon's snout was forefront, with his equally large maw ablaze with flickers of fire.

"I didn't think it would actually work.”

According to Izuku, his ability is...

Quirk: Evocation of the Thousand Sacred Guardian Spirits (Official name is Imaginary Friend)

Description: The power to call upon the beings of the universe that exist beyond human comprehension (The power to create creatures and beings out of one’s imagination)

In other words, his ability is imaginary entity creation. It’s like Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends; Izuku imagines a creature and it comes to life.

Details:

Belief-Dependent Physiology: Needs to believe they’re real so they can exist. (Good thing Izuku is a chuunibyou.)

Can create and delete imaginary entities at will. The stronger, the bigger, and more in amount he creates, the greater the energy spent.

Has a time limit on manifesting an entity. The time limit is inversely proportional to the power, size, and complexity of the imagined entity. His current time limit for Bahamut is 1 minute.

Can give limited independence to an entity. (The entity can’t decide for itself. Rather, it acts upon Izuku’s will. How it interprets his command is where the “independence” comes in, and it also depends on what personality Izuku imagined it to have.)

Since this is technically a mental power, if he overuses his quirk, Izuku will risk not just body, but also mental fatigue. He will also suffer from headaches, nausea, and in severe cases, a nosebleed.

If you haven’t noticed, Izuku doesn’t stick to one chant. This is because he technically doesn’t need it, but due to belief-dependent physiology, he has to do it because chanting enforces his belief that he’s genuine summoning something that exists.

How the heck did Izuku become a chuunibyou? And what did you mean by “he didn’t let it get to his head like Kacchan”? Chuunis are arrogant!

Izuku becomes a chuunibyou because he was already slightly delusional in the first place. The last part of the fic was from his POV. Izuku viewed the world like a fairy tale as a child, hence the title. And because he gets a quirk fueled by imagination, his delusions just get worse. Not to mention that his great-grandmother egged him on.

The definition of chuunibyou is “a person which manifests delusional behavior, particularly thinking that one has special powers that no other person has”. They don’t have to be arrogant or think they’re above everyone else; just that they have a special power. You could say that the arrogance is a by-product of the chuuni mentality.

In this case, Izuku doesn’t get the arrogance.

Why did you even think of this in the first place?

Because I always thought Izuku would grow up different if he had a quirk in the first place, I wondered what would happen if he had an overreacting imagination stemming from his childhood days; and what happens if he gets a quirk that makes this problem worse. Thus, Chuunibyou Izuku was born.

I guess you can say that he is truly a madman in every sense of the word.

I’ll show myself out now.

#i just like the idea of chuuni izuku #fanfic: fairy tale #fanfiction #boku no hero academia #midoriya izuku #chuunibyou madman #kitburner writes

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akokosblog-blog · 6 years ago

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We need your views on "A celebrated societal menace - A look at Olamide Baddo" on Akoko's Blog. Pls Comment below, Like and Share.

A celebrated societal menace - A look at Olamide Baddo

Olamide Adedeji, known popularly as Olamide Baddo is the foremost A”local rapper” in Nigeria. He rose to prominence by being one if the pioneers of rapping in the local dialect. Considered by many as the worthy successor to popular Yoruba rapper DaGrin who died at a very young age from a car crash.

Olamide quickly took advantage of the people’s hunger for an immediate successor to DaGrin and released songs like Durosoke which endeared him to many Nigerians. He was considered to be a “very brilliant chap who would go places”.

Eight years down the line and Olamide baddo is no doubt one of the biggest names in the African rapper scene even though he churns out more pop songs nowadays. He has his own record label which is currently working with Young artistes like Lyta, Limerick, Yomi Blaze and co after producing established artistes like Lil Lesh and Adekunle Gold in the past. He has won several awards and even made an appearance in my secondary school year book where a student named him as his role model, insane!

Olamide has made a habit of dropping albums every year and although he keeps up with this, it’s the quality of these albums that come under scrutiny. Sometimes, the album looks rushed and shabby and therefore there songs aren’t the top quality that the fans expect. A lot of fans complained about his last album titled “Glory” but the rapper seems unperturbed. He recently dropped a “family” album alongside his new signees and proteges. A very good album throughout, much better than his last two.

Away from all the praises, Olamide has built a reputation as an artiste that feasts on the rot in the Nigerian value system. He takes advantage of the fact that many Nigerians have lost their values.

Olamide _ Melo Melo

When Olamide first released the song “story for the gods” a lot of people, like me, couldn’t believe their ears. Here’s a scenario whereby a top rapper in the country released a song filled with vulgar and obscene lyrics and a video showing strong sexual scenes and nudity but that was not the worst part of the song.

Some of the lyrics used by Olamide in the song we’re plainly encouraging sex under the influence, sexual assault and even rape, disgusting! Olamide was “dragged” on social media, but as usual, he termed everyone who dared to have an opinion about his disgusting song “haters”. No sanctions were given to the song or the artiste except an NBC ban that “only makes songs more popular”.

If there’s anything Olamide learnt from the previous experience, it was that he should release even more disgusting songs condoning and even encouraging vices like drug abuse, fraud and illicit sexual affairs. That same year, he released a song called “falila ketan”. Another song promoting obscenities, vulgar language and illicit, even illegal sexual activities.

He went ahead to shoot a video that “supported the motion” he laid down in his song. There was backlash as usual, but Olamide couldn’t care less, after all, the same Nigerians who criticised him on the internet were listening to the song on their phones and in their cars, thereby, “giving” more money to Olamide who made it clear that he would go on yo release more of these songs as long as it makes him richer.

Olamide – Konkobility

In 2015, Olamide released yet another “corrupt” song “don’t stop”. Not only did this one get a lot of flak, it got banned by several corporations and agencies who had the best interest of the youth at heart. Olamide’s fans came to his defence every time anyone dared call Olamide what he turned himself into: the corruptor of the youth.

It’s no surprise at all that social vices have been on the rise and sexual crimes are recorded every other day. While I’m not putting the blame for this on Olamide, I dare to say that whether he realizes it or not, he has a direct influence on these numbers.

Nigeria was rated as the ninth most dangerous countries for a woman to live because she’s constantly susceptible to harrasment and sexual abuse from animalistic men who are no longer scared of the consequences, afterall, Olamide said: ” I want to do shina today, she say she cannot wait o, she say it’s getting late o, she say she wants to faint o ah, story for the gods”.

Read Also: Will You Marry Me

Olamide and Lil kesh put out that song during the festive period, a time when these kinds of ritual killings are very popular. No agency has taken any step against Lil Kesh, Olamide or even the song as at the time of writing this. All that happened was a little backlash on social media and a sold-out Olamide show just days later. This is the norm I speak of, this norm that makes Olamide think he can wreck the moral train of the Nigerian youth without facing any consequences.

Conclusion

Despite all the things I’ve listed earlier, Olamide continues to be the biggest name in Yoruba rap, winning several awards, and selling out tours and shows both in Nigeria and abroad. Perhaps, the silliness with the music and lyrics would reduce if the people took tougher stances against Baddo?

#Baddo #dagrin #Durosoke #Menace #Music #Olamide #Olamide Adedeji #rap #Rapper #Societal #Entertainment #Featured #Lifestyle

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snarktheater · 8 years ago

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Stranger Than Fanfiction — An addendum

So, I have a Twitter account. I know I hardly ever mention it, and the link to it is easy to miss in the blog's theme, but it exists. I almost forget about it myself, because I am the kind of human being who does that. Ahem.

All this to say, it feels like a semi-miracle that someone actually replied to one of my tweets on the Snark Theater account (specifically, the one about my Stranger Than Fanfiction review, and like another semi-miracle that I noticed it within just a few hours and not…like, months later. And I guess that adds up to a full miracle, because my miracle math is flawless like that.

Let's have a look (Disclaimer: I do not endorse people reading this blog post going after this Twitter user, so please don't do that, guys.)

Transcript:

The book is a NY Times best seller so a lot of people disagree with you. "It ain't Shakespeare." I bet he laughs all the way to the bank!

Hoo boy. Well, on the plus side, thank you, Twitter user gobbledguck, for reminding me about a crucial point I completely missed in my original review. Let's discuss. And I'm warning you in advance, this is probably going to be a little rambling. More than usual, I mean.

Now, I'm not talking about the tweet in general. "But if popular, how can it be bad?" is a question to which I've had a definitive answer for five years now: Fifty Shades of Grey. We live in a post-Fifty Shades world and popularity has been thoroughly debunked as a measure of quality.

So I'm not going to argue with the fact that the book is a best-seller, especially in the case of this specific book, which, in case you forgot, is written by a person who has millions of pre-established fans for something that has nothing to to with writing and who would buy anything he puts out there. Including, reluctantly so, this guy right here typing this blog post. I did not mention having a celebrity crush on Chris Colfer as a joke. It is well documented.

With the ritual self-depantsing out of the way, let's talk about the actually interesting thing in this tweet, and the one that actually ties back into the book. The (incorrect, but let's ignore that detail) quote. Let's put it back in context, which is from page 2 of Stranger Than Fanfiction.

Naturally, when it first premiered the critics treated the show [Wiz Kids, the fictional show protagonist Cash Carter stars in] like a piñata. […] However, with each fatal blow Wiz Kids only received more attention. People tuned in to see the "absurdity" for themselves, but they were not repulsed as promised. Audiences found the show's campiness to be rather charming, its unique underdog spirit resonated with them, and a global phenomenon was born. No, it wasn't Shakespeare, but on the bright side, it wasn't Shakespeare.

The low-hanging fruit response to this tweet is pretty simple. They are, after all, referencing the fact that the show is terrible, in the book's own text. It is beloved, but even the book's protagonists admit in hindsight that they don't like the show for itself as much as they like it for the community it gave them. (Which is pretty comparable to Chris Colfer's own Glee).

But let's not reach for the low-hanging fruit, because I think choosing Shakespeare of all points of comparison to be incredibly interesting. You could rephrase that last sentence of the quote as "it wasn't high art, but on the bright side, it was accessible." Which is funny to use Shakespeare for that, who…you know, made low-brow entertainment. Yeah, Shakespeare's popularity didn't stem from him writing stuffy, obscure stuff that only a tiny amount of elites could understand. It came from him writing (mostly) good stuff.

There's this weird trend these days to present critical acclaim and commercial success as antithetical, and I don't really get it. Or actually, I do, but the anti-intellectualism it derives from is kind of scary to me and I'm already planning an essay of sorts about anti-intellectualism, so I'm not sure I want to examine it in detail right about now.

The point is: anyone who criticizes something is immediately dismissed as wrong, a buzzkill, or in this specific case, fighting in vain against an overwhelming tide. It's become common to glorify being panned by critics, and it makes me wonder: what exactly are the ambitions of the people doing that?

I mean, look at Chris Colfer. What's his motive for writing this book? Is it to make money, as is implied by our Twitter user above saying he'll be "laughing all the way to the bank" at my little review? I have some serious doubts, considering he's already pretty successful. Is it because he had a story to tell, and wanted to tell it? If so…why would he consider critics to be the enemy? Wouldn't it be preferable to listen to them and strive for the best version of that story you can tell? Is it because he wanted to send a message about LGBT kids (Sam and Joey, sort of Topher), kids from toxic family environments (Mo and Joey), kids raised by single parents (all but Joey)? Then, once again, why not listen to people telling you your message might not really convey as well as you thought it would?

Of course, this is all hypothetical, and reviews aren't really meant for the author anyway. I don't expect Chris Colfer to read my review of his book, nor do I really want to, because I'm writing for potential readers, not for him. I'm talking about the attitude to dismiss critics and present a dichotomy of quality entertainment (here symbolized as "Shakespeare") versus enjoyable entertainment (i.e. Wiz Kids or the book itself). Not just because it doesn't apply to me personally (to paraphrase Lindsay Ellis on her Top Ten Guilty Pleasures video—which is apparently off Youtube at the moment—"no, I don't want to turn off my brain, I'm using it"), but also because it doesn't really seem to apply…in general.

Again, take Shakespeare. Am I supposed to just agree that it's adapted so much because people hate it? Every teenager in love sees themselves as Romeo and Juliet because that play is just so inaccessible and stuffy and high-brow? Yeah, right. (And that's without getting into a debate on whether Romeo and Juliet is a romance, a cautionary tale, or a mix of the two; it's still a pretty well-made play regardless of how you read it)

In fact, it's pretty easy to find things that are good and extremely popular, because it tends to be what survives the test of time (like, you know, Shakespeare). It's not universal, and it doesn't mean you personally have to like any of it. I hate Emile Zola's books and most of the music made before I was born, and for all I've defended him, I'm not a super fan of Shakespeare. But it doesn't mean I can't see the quality in all those things, or the fact that they had some pretty wide appeal, both then and now.

So that dichotomy is bullshit. What about the idea that critics themselves are wrong? You know, the idea that critics are a tool of the status quo rather than a measure of quality. Recently, you see that a lot whenever people criticize anything enjoyed by teenage girls (and not unreasonably so). Except…then you have to consider your definition of a critic. After all, to quote an overused phrase, everyone's a critic. All it takes is having thoughts about a thing. And in the Internet age, once can share those thoughts pretty easily, regardless of how much institutional power they hold. There's a reason this is a blog, is what I'm saying.

Point is: saying any criticism is automatically wrong by virtue of being criticism (so long as you have mass appeal) is a pretty weak counter-argument. And it feeds into a culture where critical thinking itself isn't encouraged, because you don't want to be one of those critics who just can't have fun and enjoy things, do you?

Look, I'm not mad at Twitter user gobbledguck for their reply. I'm not going to say I don't care since…you know…this post exists…but I'm not mad about it. It's symptomatic of a larger, self-perpetuating problem. Which this book is part of, by virtue of this quote, and, in a larger sense, all of Cash Carter's "how dare people criticize what I, a highly public figure with a huge influence on impressionable minds, do while in the public eye" speeches. Which Chris Colfer is a part of too, by virtue of writing this book as a highly public figure with a huge influence on impressionable mind, and publishing it for consumption.

So no, I'm not mad at that Twitter user, but I am mad at this book for participating into a culture that makes that tweet a possibility, and allows this user to go on without questioning their own biases.

I feel like there's probably a better rant about anti-intellectualism and the rejection of all critics in me. Hell, I feel like there's a better rant about it in relationship with this book. But, well, this is a hot take on a tweet. Maybe I'll even regret it in a few days. I've had a streak of regretting some of my recent posts and all.

But what I'm pretty sure I won't regret is the main point, the tl;dr as we are used to saying here on the Internet: "No, it wasn't Shakespeare, but on the bright side, it wasn't Shakespeare" is more or less equivalent to admitting you have no interest in writing (or reading) a good story, and honestly, I feel kind of sad for you and your admitted creative bankruptcy.

Now I'll get off my high horse before someone points out to me that that Twitter account has all of four tweets, and the other three are dedicated to shipping Chris Colfer with his co-star, and I'm probably being played by a troll and/or falling on deaf ears with this one. Reviews aren't meant for the author anyway, and I suppose this is no exception.

Okay, that should be enough self-deprecating humor that this post doesn't come across as too insufferable. Now I'll go back to bitching about a popular TV show or something.

#stranger than fanfiction #chris colfer #anti intellectualism #criticism #critical thought #critics #attacking the critics #young adult #ya books #books #young adult books #book reviews #ya #reviews #book #book review #review #st: book reviews

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postmallgothgeneration · 5 years ago

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The Post-Mall Goth Generation

Originally Posted Thursday, December 22, 2016

Author’s note: I originally wrote this back in 2016 for a blog I had at the time. This was before the emo revival had really taken root. Searching the emo or scene tags on tumblr at that point would yield all the old-internet pictures of emo kids that we’ve all seen, plus a handful of unrelated, vaguely alternative photos. New scene and emo content just wasn’t a thing, and as it turns out, new mall goth content was even farther behind (when I started this blog I was the only person I was aware of on tumblr actually using mall goth as a positive descriptor). Given the vast growth in the emocore and scenecore communities (as well as other related communities) here on tumblr, I thought it was time to dig up this essay and share it with you all.

As Goth is nearing its 40th birthday, many members of the community are taking a chance to look back and reflect. This is happening in a general overarching sense, with posts such as Lady Von Ruin's popular Goth vs Mainstream Over 40 Years post, but there is also a lot of attention being paid to the goth scene of the early 2000s as well. Lady Von Ruin's post stirred up several replies in defense of the era. In addition to that, 2000s fashion was featured as a possible upcoming trend in The Mutant Stomp Friend's 2017 Trend Predictions post. Clearly there's something in the water foretelling the return of this (Cringy? Nostalgia-filled?) era.

For anyone who was in the scene during the early 2000s, this is bound to bring up strong feelings. Whether you love it for the nostalgia and fond memories, or hate it for the embarrassment, this was an important part of many goths' lives. It was truly an era in the history of the scene, bringing in many new people and shaping their early interactions with the community. DJ Gomez discusses this quite extensively in his Ode to Mall Goths.

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But what about the goths that hadn't gotten into the scene yet in the early 2000s? As DJ Gomez also mentions, there are many people who were introduced to the goth scene in more recent years, after the mall goth phenomenon had all but died out. I won't rehash all of the reasons for this cultural shift (an increase in internet presence, decrease in malls, etc) but let's say that things have definitely changed. Where does this leave the post-mall goth generation? What is our nostalgia? Where do we fit into this conversation? "We?" Yes, we. I myself am a member of the post-mall goth generation. I was not introduced to the scene until 2009, after the mall goth phenomenon had faded into virtual nothingness. My town didn't even have a proper mall, much less a Hottopic. Our equivalent was snatching up Halloween gear from Party City or Spirit Halloween Super Store. Not only had mall goth disappeared, emo had essentially come and gone by that time as well. Many of the mall goth generation comment that emo didn't exist yet when they were getting into the scene. Well, I am from a different world my friends. Emo had been around long enough to have its influence on the public perception of the darkly clad, and was on its way out by the time I was around, having hit its peak around 2007 from what I can tell. Its last vestiges still clung to life, embodied in the pair of “scene queens” my middle school boasted, but for all intents and purposes I had missed it, just as I had missed mall goth. That has always caused me some pain. I don't miss mall goth, because I never saw mall goth. It was too far gone by the time I was around. But I miss emo and scene culture. I know that right there loses me goth points, but screw it, it's true. I am not nostalgic for them exactly, for I was never a part of either of those communities. I just feel that I lost something as I watched them die out. There are times where I wish I had been around just a few years earlier so that I could have witnessed them in their fullness. That wondering of "what could have been" has played into my personal history with goth, and perhaps the general history of the post-mall goth generation, but it is still not the bulk of our history. It is the history we witnessed, not the history we lived. So what did we live through? What is our nostalgia? This is going to vary from person to person, of course, but I believe the internet was the early home of the post-mall goth generation. As DJ Gomez discusses in his article, the internet in many ways killed the mall goth and many communal goth activities. However, the internet also built communal spaces and became a place for the young to gain information and find others like themselves. My babybat days were shaped by websites like Antimony & Lace, Gothic Charm School, and Mookychick (which had an emo fashion section back then!). I read the Gothic Charm School book, which was published in June of that year, cover to cover multiple times. I used YouTube to listen to all of the suggested goth music, and to do even more research. I spent hours watching vloggers like Kill Natalie and KINGgutterface (and of course the Gothic Charm School videos). What was even more important to me, and what I am nostalgic for now, was the tight knit goth blogging community that existed back then. When I started blogging back on Goth-to-Goth, I was amazed by how much bloggers supported each other. I regularly communicated with and was encouraged by my idols at the time including Jillian Venters, Amy Townsend, and Sophistique Noir (whose name I apparently don't know). Not only that but there were so many other goths around my own age who were just starting out in the community. I actually had peers in the subculture because of it. Looking back on it I am so grateful to have had this nurturing community at that point in my development. So that is my nostalgia, those are my fond babybat days. I think tight knit internet communities are a pretty common story for people who got into goth around the same time I did, late 2000s-early 2010s. People who got into it even more recently are going to have an even different story of course. Things are still shifting. Things are always shifting. Even from what I can see, the tight knit internet communities have faded out, giving way to less community driven forms of communication such as Tumblr. Tumblr already existed when I was getting into the scene, but the role of it and other social media has definitely increased. If nothing else, you can see it in the number of people who have left long-form blogs like blogger and wordpress for short-form blogs like Tumblr. It's not bad, it just forms a less interpersonal community. Given all this do I think early 2000s era goth is going to make a revamped comeback? Truthfully yes, but not from the people who lived from it the first time. From what I have seen, a lot of the post-mall goth generation had information and knowledge at there fingertips when they were just starting out. This led to us making less embarrassing mistakes but it also increased the pressure to be perfect from the start. I think a lot of us now have reached a point where we've been in the scene long enough that we feel comfortable exploring a style that is less serious and music that isn't necessarily goth. Really, I think we are going to primarily see a resurgence in emo styles with 2000s goth being more of a secondary thing. Or perhaps they shall combine somewhat. That must sound horrible to some people, but I think it could work if done well.* All I know is that I have seen such an upsurge in the popularity of emo recently that it must be making a comeback, at least among my own age group. Come to think of it, even before I saw this topic coming up in conversation so often, my style was starting to head in that direction, as is evidenced by my last post... *Maybe it doesn't even have to be done well. Maybe that's not the point. Maybe this is just the time for people who are finally comfortable with their place in the subculture to irreverently explore trends and music they like without ridicule. Perhaps we should all banish the word "cringe" from our vocabulary and just let people do what they want as long as they aren't hurting anybody. Maybe a lot of things. Okay. Tiny rant over.

#emocore #scenecore #gothgoth #mall goth #mine

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mapstudiodesign-blog · 6 years ago

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The world's 50 most powerful blogs

From Prince Harry in Afghanistan to Tom Cruise ranting about Scientology and footage from the Burmese uprising, blogging has never been bigger. It can help elect presidents and take down attorney generals while simultaneously celebrating the minutiae of our everyday obsessions. Here are the 50 best reasons to log on.

The following apology was published in the Observer's For the record column, Sunday March 16 2008 The article below said 'Psychodwarf' was Beppe Grillo's nickname for 'Mario Mastella, leader of the Popular-UDEUR centre-right party', but it's actually his nickname for Silvio Berlusconi. Mastella's first name is Clemente and Popular-UDEUR was part of Romano Prodi's centre-left coalition. And Peter Rojas, not Ryan Block, founded Engadget and co-founded Gizmodo. Apologies.

1. The Huffington Post

The history of political blogging might usefully be divided into the periods pre- and post-Huffington. Before the millionaire socialite Arianna Huffington decided to get in on the act, bloggers operated in a spirit of underdog solidarity. They hated the mainstream media - and the feeling was mutual. Bloggers saw themselves as gadflies, pricking the arrogance of established elites from their home computers, in their pyjamas, late into the night. So when, in 2005, Huffington decided to mobilise her fortune and media connections to create, from scratch, a flagship liberal blog she was roundly derided. Who, spluttered the original bloggerati, did she think she was? But the pyjama purists were confounded. Arianna's money talked just as loudly online as off, and the Huffington Post quickly became one of the most influential and popular journals on the web. It recruited professional columnists and celebrity bloggers. It hoovered up traffic. Its launch was a landmark moment in the evolution of the web because it showed that many of the old rules still applied to the new medium: a bit of marketing savvy and deep pockets could go just as far as geek credibility, and get there faster.

Read more To borrow the gold-rush simile beloved of web pioneers, Huffington's success made the first generation of bloggers look like two-bit prospectors panning for nuggets in shallow creeks before the big mining operations moved in. In the era pre-Huffington, big media companies ignored the web, or feared it; post-Huffington they started to treat it as just another marketplace, open to exploitation. Three years on, Rupert Murdoch owns MySpace, while newbie amateur bloggers have to gather traffic crumbs from under the table of the big-time publishers. Least likely to post 'I'm so over this story - check out the New York Times' huffingtonpost.com

2. Boing Boing

Lego reconstructions of pop videos and cakes baked in the shape of iPods are not generally considered relevant to serious political debate. But even the most earnest bloggers will often take time out of their busy schedule to pass on some titbit of mildly entertaining geek ephemera. No one has done more to promote pointless, yet strangely cool, time-wasting stuff on the net than the editors of Boing Boing (subtitle: A Directory of Wonderful Things). It launched in January 2000 and has had an immeasurable influence on the style and idiom of blogging. But hidden among the pictures of steam-powered CD players and Darth Vader tea towels there is a steely, ultra-liberal political agenda: championing the web as a global medium free of state and corporate control. Boing Boing chronicles cases where despotic regimes have silenced or imprisoned bloggers. It helped channel blogger scorn on to Yahoo and Google when they kowtowed to China's censors in order to win investment opportunities. It was instrumental in exposing the creeping erosion of civil liberties in the US under post-9/11 'Homeland Security' legislation. And it routinely ridicules attempts by the music and film industries to persecute small-time file sharers and bedroom pirates instead of getting their own web strategies in order. It does it all with gentle, irreverent charm, polluted only occasionally with gratuitous smut. Their dominance of the terrain where technology meets politics makes the Boing Boing crew geek aristocracy. Least likely to post 'Has anyone got a stamp?' boingboing.net

3. Techcrunch

Techcrunch began in 2005 as a blog about dotcom start-ups in Silicon Valley, but has quickly become one of the most influential news websites across the entire technology industry. Founder Michael Arrington had lived through the internet goldrush as a lawyer and entrepreneur before deciding that writing about new companies was more of an opportunity than starting them himself. His site is now ranked the third-most popular blog in the world by search engine Technorati, spawning a mini-empire of websites and conferences as a result. Business Week named Arrington one of the 25 most influential people on the web, and Techcrunch has even scored interviews with Barack Obama and John McCain. With a horde of hungry geeks and big money investors online, Techcrunch is the largest of a wave of technology-focused blog publishers to tap into the market - GigaOm, PaidContent and Mashable among them - but often proves more contentious than its rivals, thanks to Arrington's aggressive relationships with traditional media and his conflicts of interest as an investor himself. Least likely to post 'YouTube? It'll never catch on' techcrunch.com

4. Kottke

One of the early wave of blogging pioneers, web designer Jason Kottke started keeping track of interesting things on the internet as far back as 1998. The site took off, boosted partly through close links to popular blog-building website Blogger (he later married one of the founders). And as the phenomenon grew quickly, Kottke became a well-known filter for surfers on the lookout for interesting reading. Kottke remains one of the purest old-skool bloggers on the block - it's a selection of links to websites and articles rather than a repository for detailed personal opinion - and although it remains fairly esoteric, his favourite topics include film, science, graphic design and sport. He often picks up trends and happenings before friends start forwarding them to your inbox. Kottke's decision to consciously avoid politics could be part of his appeal (he declares himself 'not a fan'), particularly since the blog's voice is literate, sober and inquiring, unlike much of the red-faced ranting found elsewhere online. A couple of key moments boosted Kottke's fame: first, being threatened with legal action by Sony for breaking news about a TV show, but most notably quitting his web-design job and going solo three years ago. A host of 'micropatrons' and readers donated cash to cover his salary, but these days he gets enough advertising to pay the bills. He continues to plug away at the site as it enters its 10th year. Least likely to post 'Look at this well wicked vid of a dog on a skateboard' kottke.org

5. Dooce

One of the best-known personal bloggers (those who provide more of a diary than a soapbox or reporting service), Heather Armstrong has been writing online since 2001. Though there were personal websites that came before hers, certain elements conspired to make Dooce one of the biggest public diaries since Samuel Pepys's (whose diary is itself available, transcribed in blog form, at Pepysdiary.com). Primarily, Armstrong became one of the first high-profile cases of somebody being fired for writing about her job. After describing events that her employer - a dotcom start-up - thought reflected badly on them, Armstrong was sacked. The incident caused such fierce debate that Dooce found itself turned into a verb that is used in popular parlance (often without users realising its evolution): 'dooced - to be fired from one's job as a direct result of one's personal website'. Behind Dooce stands an army of personal bloggers perhaps not directly influenced by, or even aware of, her work - she represents the hundreds of thousands who decide to share part of their life with strangers. Armstrong's honesty has added to her popularity, and she has written about work, family life, postnatal depression, motherhood, puppies and her Mormon upbringing with the same candid and engaging voice. Readers feel that they have been brought into her life, and reward her with their loyalty. Since 2005 the advertising revenue on her blog alone has been enough to support her family. Least likely to post 'I like babies but I couldn't eat a whole one' dooce.com

6. Perezhilton

Once dubbed 'Hollywood's most hated website', Perezhilton (authored by Mario Lavandeira since 2005) is the gossip site celebrities fear most. Mario, 29, is famous for scrawling rude things (typically doodles about drug use) over pap photos and outing closeted stars. On the day of Lindsay Lohan's arrest for drink-driving, he posted 60 updates, and 8m readers logged on. He's a shameless publicity whore, too. His reality show premiered on VH1 last year, and his blogsite is peppered with snaps of him cuddling Paris Hilton at premieres. Fergie from Black Eyed Peas alluded to him in a song, and Avril Lavigne phoned, asking him to stop writing about her after he repeatedly blogged about her lack of talent and her 'freakishly long arm'. Least likely to post 'Log on tomorrow for Kofi Annan's live webchat' perezhilton.com

7. Talking points memo

At some point during the disputed US election of 2000 - when Al Gore was famously defeated by a few hanging chads - Joshua Micah Marshall lost patience. Despite working as a magazine editor, Marshall chose to vent on the web. Eight years later Talking Points Memo and its three siblings draw in more than 400,000 viewers a day from their base in New York. Marshall has forged a reputation, and now makes enough money to run a small team of reporters who have made an impact by sniffing out political scandal and conspiracy. 'I think in many cases the reporting we do is more honest, more straight than a lot of things you see even on the front pages of great papers like the New York Times and the Washington Post,' he said in an interview last year. 'But I think both kinds of journalism should exist, should co-exist.' Although his unabashed partisan approach is admonished by many old-fashioned American reporters, Marshall's skills at pulling together the threads of a story have paid dividends. Last year he helped set the agenda after George Bush covertly fired a string of US attorneys deemed disloyal to the White House. While respected mainstream media figures accused Marshall of seeing conspiracy, he kept digging: the result was the resignation of attorney general Alberto Gonzales, and a prestigious George Polk journalism award for Marshall, the first ever for a blogger. Least likely to post 'Barack is so, like, gnarly to the max' talkingpointsmemo.com

8. Icanhascheezburger

Amused by a photo of a smiling cat, idiosyncratically captioned with the query 'I Can Has A Cheezburger?', which he found on the internet while between jobs in early 2007, Eric Nakagawa of Hawaii emailed a copy of it to a friend (known now only as Tofuburger). Then, on a whim, they began a website, first comprising only that one captioned photo but which has since grown into one of the most popular blogs in the world. Millions of visitors visit Icanhascheezburger.com to see, create, submit and vote on Lolcats (captioned photos of characterful cats in different settings). The 'language' used in the captions, which this blog has helped to spread globally, is known as Lolspeak, aka Kitty Pidgin. In Lolspeak, human becomes 'hooman', Sunday 'bunday', exactly 'xackly' and asthma 'azma'. There is now an effort to develop a LOLCode computer-programming language and another to translate the Bible into Lolspeak. Least likely to post 'Actually, dogs are much more interesting..." icanhascheezburger.com

9. Beppe Grillo

Among the most visited blogs in the world is that of Beppe Grillo, a popular Italian comedian and political commentator, long persona non grata on state TV, who is infuriated daily - especially by corruption and financial scandal in his country. A typical blog by Grillo calls, satirically or otherwise, for the people of Naples and Campania to declare independence, requests that Germany declare war on Italy to help its people ('We will throw violets and mimosa to your Franz and Gunther as they march through') or reports on Grillo's ongoing campaign to introduce a Bill of Popular Initiative to remove from office all members of the Italian parliament who've ever had a criminal conviction. Grillo's name for Mario Mastella, leader of the Popular-UDEUR centre-right party, is Psychodwarf. 'In another country, he would have been the dishwasher in a pizzeria,' says Grillo. Through his blog, he rallied many marchers in 280 Italian towns and cities for his 'Fuck You' Day last September. Least likely to post 'Sign up to our campaign to grant Silvo Berlusconi immunity' beppegrillo.it

10. Gawker

A New York blog of 'snarky' gossip and commentary about the media industry, Gawker was founded in 2002 by journalist Nick Denton, who had previously helped set up a networking site called First Tuesday for web and media entrepreneurs. Gawker's earliest fascination was gossip about Vogue editor Anna Wintour, garnered from underlings at Conde Nast. This set the tone for amassing a readership of movers and shakers on the Upper East Side, as well as 'the angry creative underclass' wishing either to be, or not be, like them, or both ('the charmingly incompetent X... the wildly successful blowhard'). Within a year Gawker's readers were making 500,000 page views per month. Nowadays the figure is 11m, recovering from a recent dip to 8m thanks to the showing of a Tom Cruise 'Indoctrination Video' which Scientologists had legally persuaded YouTube to take down. Gawker remains the flagship of Gawker Media, which now comprises 14 blogs, although gossiping by ex-Gawker insiders, a fixation on clicks (which its bloggers are now paid on the basis of) and fresh anxiety over defining itself have led some to claim Gawker has become more 'tabloidy' and celeb- and It-girl-orientated, and less New York-centric. But its core value - 'media criticism' - appears to be intact. Least likely to post 'We can only wish Rupert Murdoch well with his new venture' gawker.com

11. The Drudge Report

The Report started life as an email gossip sheet, and then became a trashy webzine with negligible traffic. But thanks to the decision in 1998 to run a scurrilous rumour – untouched by mainstream media – about Bill Clinton and a White House intern named Monica Lewinsky, it became a national phenomenon. Recent scoops include Barack Obama dressed in tribal garb and the fact Prince Harry was serving in Afghanistan. Drudge is scorned by journalists and serious bloggers for his tabloid sensibilities, but his place in the media history books is guaranteed. And much though they hate him, the hacks all still check his front page – just in case he gets another president-nobbling scoop. Least likely to post 'Oops, one sec – just got to check the facts…' drudgereport.com

12. Xu Jinglei

Jinglei is a popular actress (and director of Letter From An Unknown Woman) in China, who in 2005 began a blog ('I got the joy of expressing myself') which within a few months had garnered 11.5m visits and spurred thousands of other Chinese to blog. In 2006 statisticians at Technorati, having previously not factored China into their calculations, realised Jinglei's blog was the most popular in the world. In it she reports on her day-to-day moods, reflections, travels, social life and cats ('Finally the first kitten's been born!!! Just waiting for the second, in the middle of the third one now!!!!!!!! It's midnight, she gave birth to another one!!!!!!'). She blogs in an uncontroversial but quite reflective manner, aiming to show a 'real person' behind the celebrity. Each posting, usually ending with 'I have to be up early' or a promise to report tomorrow on a DVD she is watching, is followed by many hundreds of comments from readers – affirming their love, offering advice, insisting she take care. Last year her blog passed the 1bn clicks mark. Least likely to post 'Forget the kittens – get a Kalashnikov!!!!!!!' blog.sina.com.cn/xujinglei

13. Treehugger

Treehugger is a green consumer blog with a mission to bring a sustainable lifestyle to the masses. Its ethos, that a green lifestyle does not have to mean sacrifice, and its positive, upbeat feel have attracted over 1.8m unique users a month. Consistently ranked among the top 20 blogs on Technorati, Treehugger has 10 staff but also boasts 40 writers from a wide variety of backgrounds in more than 10 countries around the world, who generate more than 30 new posts a day across eight categories, ranging from fashion and beauty, travel and nature, to science and technology. Treehugger began as an MBA class project four years ago and says it now generates enough revenue from sponsorship and advertising to pay all its staffers and writers. It has developed a highly engaged community and has added popular services like TreeHugger.tv, and a user-generated blog, Hugg. It was bought by the Discovery Channel last year for a rumoured $10m. Least likely to post 'Why Plastic Bags rock' treehugger.com

14. Microsiervos

Microsiervos, which began in 2001, took its name from Douglas Coupland's novel Microserfs, a diary entry-style novel about internet pioneers. It is run by Alvy, Nacho and Wicho, three friends in Madrid, who blog in Spanish. The second most popular blog in Europe and the 13th most popular in the world (according to eBizMBA), Microsiervos concerns itself with science, curiosities, strange reality, chance, games, puzzles, quotations, conspiracies, computers, hacking, graffiti and design. It is informal, friendly and humorous, moving from news of an eccentric new letter font to reflections on the discovery of the Milky Way having double the thickness it was previously thought to have. Least likely to post 'The internet is, like, so over' microsiervos.com

15. TMZ

You want relentless celebrity gossip on tap? TMZ will provide it, and when we say relentless, we mean relentless. The US site is dripping with 'breaking news' stories, pictures and videos, and deems celeb activity as mundane as stars walking to their cars worthy of a video post. TMZ was launched in 2005 by AOL and reportedly employs around 20 writers to keep the celeb juice flowing. It pulls in 1.6m readers a month and is endlessly cited as the source for red-top celeb stories. It was the first to break Alec Baldwin's now infamous 'rude little pig' voicemail last April, for instance. TMZ prides itself on being close to the action, so close, in fact, a TMZ photographer had his foot run over by Britney Spears mid-meltdown. They auctioned the tyre-tracked sock on eBay in aid of US charity the Children's Defense Fund last autumn. Least likely to post 'Paris is a metaphor for Third World debt' TMZ.com

16. Engadget

Engadget provides breaking news, rumours and commentary on, for instance, a camera able to track a head automatically, the very latest HD screen or 'visual pollution' concerns prompted by hand-held pico laser-projectors. The world's most popular blog on gadgets and consumer electronics, Engadget was founded by Peter Rojas in 2004 and won the Web Blogs Awards that year and each year since. Now part of Weblogs Inc (owned by AOL), it is offered on many other sites (including GoogleMail) as a default RSS feed, and is published in English, Spanish, Japanese and Chinese. Last year, a mistake confirmed Engadget's power - upon reporting a supposed email (which turned out to be a hoax) from Apple, informing Apple employees of a delay in the launch of iPhone, Apple's share price fell by 3 per cent within minutes. Rojas also co-founded rival gadget blog Gizmodo. Least likely to post 'An iWhat?' engadget.com

17. Marbury

No matter what happens between now and 4 November, you can be certain the US presidential election of 2008 will be among the most historically important and dramatic of any fought. Having an informed opinion will be a must, but if you are as yet unable to tell your Iowa Caucus from your Feiler Faster Thesis, Marbury – a British blog on American politics – is the place to start. The site's creator, Ian Leslie, is an ex-expat who fell for American politics during a four-year stint living in New York. The site signposts important events and interesting analyses, gives context and witty commentary on everything from the most serious speeches to the silliest election-themed YouTube clips. And West Wing fans will be pleased to note that the blog's name is a reference to the show's British ambassador to the United States, Lord John Marbury, who, appropriately enough, provided an eccentrically British but reliably insightful appraisal of American politics. Least likely to post 'Is it just me or is Romney getting cuter?' marbury.typepad.com

18. Chez Pim

Attracting around 10,000 people from all over the globe to her site every week, Pim Techamuanvivit has tried and tested an awful lot of food. From Michelin-starred restaurants to street food and diners, she samples it all, and posts her thoughts and pictures to share with other foodie fans. She advises her readers on what cooking equipment to go for, posts recipe suggestions for them to try, and gives them a nudge in the direction of which food shows are worth a watch. She's not just famous on the net, she's attracted global coverage in the media with her writing, recipes and interviews appearing in such diverse publications as the New York Times, Le Monde and the Sydney Morning Herald. Least likely to post 'Chocolate's my favourite flavour of Pop Tart' chezpim.typepad.com

19. Basic thinking

Recently rated the 18th most influential blog in the world by Wikio, Basic Thinking, which has the tag line 'Mein Haus, Mein Himmel, Mein Blog', is run by Robert Basic of Usingen, Germany, who aims 'to boldly blog what no one has blogged before', and recently posted his 10,000th entry. Basic Thinking reports on technology and odds and ends, encouraging readers to rummage through an 1851 edition of the New York Times one minute and to contemplate the differences between mooses and elks the next. Least likely to post 'Mein heim, mein gott – I need to get a life' basicthinking.de/blog

20. The Sartorialist

As ideas go, this one is pretty simple. Man wanders around Manhattan with a camera. Spots someone whose outfit he likes. Asks if he can take a picture. Goes home and posts it on his blog. But the man in question is Scott Schuman, who had 15 years' experience working at the high-fashion end of the clothing industry before starting The Sartorialist. He's got a sharp eye for a good look, a gift for grabbing an on-the-hoof pic and an unwavering enthusiasm for people going the extra mile in the name of style. Minimalist it might be, but his site – a basic scroll of full-length street portraits, occasionally annotated with a brief note – is mesmeric and oddly beautiful. The site attracts more than 70,000 readers a day and has been named one of Time's Top 100 Design Influences. So if you're out and about and a guy called Scott asks to take your picture, just smile. You're about to become a style icon. Least likely to post 'Sometimes you need to chill in a shellsuit' thesartorialist.blogspot.com

21. Students for a free Tibet

Taking the protest online, Students for a Free Tibet (SFT) is a global, grassroots network of students campaigning to free Tibet, which has been occupied by China since 1950. Students in Tibet face arrest for posting on the site, but many escape to blog about their experiences in exile. With a history of direct action, the group is now uniting worldwide members through the web, blogging to spread word of news and protests, and using sites like Facebook to raise funds. The organisation, which was founded in 1994 in New York, spans more than 35 countries and gets up to 100,000 hits a month. In 2006, SFT used a satellite link at Mount Everest base camp to stream live footage on to YouTube of a demonstration against Chinese Olympic athletes practising carrying the torch there. Later this year the web will be a critical tool in organising and reporting protests during the games. 'SFT plans to stage protests in Beijing during the games and post blogs as events unfold,' says Iain Thom, the SFT UK national co-ordinator. 'But for security reasons we can't reveal details of how or where yet.' Similarly, a massive protest in London on 10 March will be the subject of intense cyber comment. In response, the site has fallen victim to increasingly sophisticated cyber attacks. Investigations have traced the sources back to China, leading to speculation that the Chinese authorities are trying to sabotage the site to stop online critics. Least likely to post 'Hey guyz, any hotties in the Nepal region?!' studentsforafreetibet.org

22. Jezebel

Last year Gawker Media launched Jezebel – a blog which aimed to become a brilliant version of a women's magazine. It succeeded quickly, in part by acknowledging the five big lies perpetuated by the women's media: The Cover Lie (female forgeries of computer-aided artistry); The Celebrity-Profile Lie (flattery, more nakedly consumerist and less imaginative than the movies they're shilling for); The Must-Have Lie (magazine editors are buried in free shit); The Affirmation Crap Lie (you are insecure about things you didn't know it was possible to be insecure about); and The Big Meta Lie (we're devastatingly affected by the celebrity media). Their regular 'Crap Email From a Dude' feature is especially fantastic, as is their coverage of current stories (opinionated and consistently hilarious) and politics. It offers the best lady-aimed writing on the web, along with lots of nice pictures of Amy Winehouse getting out of cars. Least likely to post 'How To Look Skinny While Pleasing Your Man!' jezebel.com

23. Gigazine

Created by Satoshi Yamasaki and Mazaki Keito of Osaka, Gigazine is the most popular blog in Japan, covering the latest in junk foods and beverages, games, toys and other ingredients of colourful pop product culture. Visitors first witness 'eye candy' such as David Beckham condoms (from China), 75 turtles in a fridge, the packaging for Mega Frankfurters or a life-size Ferrari knitted from wool, learn of a second X-Files movie moving into pre-pre-production, watch a vacuum-cleaning robot being tested and compare taste reports of Kentucky Fried Chicken's new Shrimp Tsuisuta Chilli. Least likely to post 'Anyone seen these charming croquet mallets?' gigazine.net

24. Girl with a one-track mind

Following in the footsteps of Belle de Jour – the anonymous blogger claiming to be a sex worker – the girl with a one track mind started writing in open, explicit terms about her lively sex life in 2004. By 2006, the blog was bookified and published by Ebury, and spent much time on bestseller lists, beach towels and hidden behind the newspapers of serious-looking commuters. Though she was keen to retain her anonymity and continue her career in the film industry, author 'Abby Lee' was soon outed as north Londoner Zoe Margolis by a Sunday newspaper. Least likely to post 'I've got a headache' girlwithaonetrackmind.blogspot.com

25. Mashable

Founded by Peter Cashmore in 2005, Mashable is a social-networking news blog, reporting on and reviewing the latest developments, applications and features available in or for MySpace, Facebook, Bebo and countless lesser-known social-networking sites and services, with a special emphasis on functionality. The blog's name Mashable is derived from Mashup, a term for the fusing of multiple web services. Readers range from top web 2.0 developers to savvy 13-year-olds wishing for the latest plug-ins to pimp up their MySpace pages. Least likely to post 'But why don't you just phone them up?' mashable.com

26. Greek tragedy

Stephanie Klein's blog allows her to 'create an online scrapbook of my life, complete with drawings, photos and my daily musings' or, rather, tell tawdry tales of dating nightmares, sexual encounters and bodily dysfunctions. Thousands of women tune in for daily accounts of her narcissistic husband and nightmarish mother-in-law and leave equally self-revealing comments transforming the pages into something of a group confessional. The blog has been so successful that Klein has penned a book, Straight Up and Dirty, and has featured in countless magazine and newspaper articles around the globe. Not bad for what Klein describes as 'angst online'. Least likely to post 'Enough about me – what's your news?' stephanieklein.blogs.com

27. Holy Moly

If a weekly flick through Heat just isn't enough, then a daily intake of Holy Moly will certainly top up those celeb gossip levels. The UK blog attracts 750,000 visitors a month and 240,000 celeb-obsessees subscribe to the accompanying weekly mail-out. It's an established resource for newspaper columnists – both tabloid and broadsheet – and there's a daily 'News from the Molehill' slot in the free London paper The Metro. Last month Holy Moly created headlines in its own right by announcing a rethink on publishing paparazzi shots. The blog will no longer publish pics obtained when 'pursuing people in cars and on bikes', as well as 'celebrities with their kids', 'people in distress at being photographed' and off-duty celebs. But don't think that means the omnipresent celeb blog that sends shivers round offices up and down the country on 'mail-out day' is slowing down – there has been talk of Holy Moly expanding into TV. Least likely to post 'What do you think of the new Hanif Kureishi?' holymoly.co.uk

28. Michelle Malkin

Most surveys of web use show a fairly even gender balance online, but political blogging is dominated by men. One exception is Michelle Malkin, a conservative newspaper columnist and author with one of the most widely read conservative blogs in the US. That makes her one of the most influential women online. Her main theme is how liberals betray America by being soft on terrorism, peddling lies about global warming and generally lacking patriotism and moral fibre. Least likely to post 'That Obama's got a lovely smile, hasn't he?' www.michellemalkin.com

29. Cranky flier

There's nowhere to hide for airlines these days. Not with self-confessed 'airline dork' Brett Snyder, aka Cranky Flier, keeping tabs on their progress. He's moved on from spending his childhood birthdays in airport hotels, face pressed against the window watching the planes come in, and turned his attention to reporting on the state of airlines. His CV is crammed with various US airline jobs, which gives him the insider knowledge to cast his expert eye over everything from the recent 777 emergency landing at Heathrow to spiralling baggage handling costs and the distribution of air miles to 'virtual assistants'. Least likely to post 'There's nothing wrong with a well-conducted cavity search' crankyflier.com

30. Go fug yourself

It's a neat word, fug – just a simple contraction of 'ugly' and its preceding expletive – but from those three letters an entire fugging industry has grown. At Go Fug Yourself, celebrity offenders against style, elegance and the basic concept of making sure you're covering your reproductive organs with some form of clothing before you leave the house are 'fugged' by the site's writers, Jessica Morgan and Heather Cocks. In their hands, the simple pleasure of yelping 'Does she even OWN a mirror?' at a paparazzi shot of some B-list headcase in fuchsia becomes an epic battle against dull Oscar gowns, ill-fitting formalwear and Lindsay Lohan's leggings. The site stays on the right side of gratuitous nastiness by dishing out generous praise when due (the coveted 'Well Played'), being genuinely thoughtful on questions of taste and funnier on the subject of random starlets in sequined sweatpants than you could possibly even imagine. Least likely to post 'Oprah looked great in those stretch jeans' gofugyourself.typepad.com

31. Gaping void

In the middle of a career as an adman in New York, Hugh MacLeod found himself doodling acerbic and almost surreal cartoons on the back of people's business cards to pass the time in bars. Everyone seemed to like the idea, so he kept going. Things started going gangbusters when he pimped his cartoons on the internet, and as he built an audience through his blog, he started writing about his other passion – the new world of understanding how to adapt marketing to the new world of the net. Remember when everybody was madly printing off vouchers from the web that saved you 40 per cent? That was one of his: aimed at helping shift more bottles from Stormhoek, the South African vintner he works with. Least likely to post 'This product really sells itself' gapingvoid.com

32. Dirtydirty dancing

If someone stole your camera, took it out for the night to parties you yourself aren't cool enough to go to and returned it in the morning, you would probably find it loaded up with pictures like those posted on DirtyDirtyDancing. The site seems pretty lo-fi – just entries called things like 'Robin's birthday' and 'FEB16' featuring pages of images of hip young things getting their party on. And that's it. The original delight was in logging on to see if you'd made it on to the site – your chances increase exponentially if you're beautiful, avant-garde and hang out at clubs and parties in the edgier parts of London – but now the site can get up to 900,000 hits a month from all over the world. Least likely to post 'Revellers at the Earl of Strathdore's hunt ball' dirtydirtydancing.com

33. Crooked timber

With a title pulled from Immanuel Kant's famous statement that 'out of the crooked timber of humanity, no straight thing was ever made', it's an amalgam of academic and political writing that has muscled its way into the epicentre of intelligent discussion since its conception in 2003. Formed as an internet supergroup, pulling several popular intellectual blogs together, Crooked Timber now has 16 members – largely academics – across the US, Europe, Australia and Asia. The site has built itself a reputation as something of an intellectual powerhouse; a sort of global philosophical thinktank conducted via blog. Least likely to post 'Did anyone see Casualty last night?' crookedtimber.org

34. Beansprouts

Combining diary, opinion and green lifestyle tips, Beansprouts is a blog that covers one family's 'search for the good life'. Melanie Rimmer and her family of five live in a 'small ex-council house' with a garden on the edge of farmland in Poynton, Cheshire. They grow food on an allotment nearby, keep chickens and bees and 'try to be green, whatever that means'. Rimmer set up the blog nearly two years ago when she first got the allotment and says she felt it was something worth writing about. With one post a day, often more, topics for discussion can range from top 10 uses for apples to making scrap quilts. Least likely to post 'Make mine a Happy Meal' bean-sprouts.blogspot.com

35. The offside

Launched by 'Bob' after the success of his WorldCupBlog in 2006, Offside is a UK-based blog covering football leagues globally, gathering news and visuals on all of it, inviting countless match reports and promoting discussion on all things soccer, from the attack by a colony of red ants on a player in the Sao Paulo state championship third division, to the particular qualities of every one of Cristiano Ronaldo's goals so far this season. Considered by many to be the best 'serious' blog in the game, it nevertheless promises irreverently, 'If there is a sex scandal in England, we'll be stuck in the middle of it. If a player is traded for 1,000lb of beef in Romania, we'll cook the steak. And if something interesting happens in Major League Soccer, we'll be just as surprised as you.' Least likely to post 'Check out Ronaldo's bubble butt' theoffside.com

36. Peteite Anglaise

The tagline of a new book hitting British shelves reads 'In Paris, in love, in trouble', but if it were telling the whole story, perhaps it should read 'In public' too. Bored at work one day in 2004, expat secretary Catherine Sanderson happened upon the concept of blogging. With a few clicks and an impulse she created her own blog, and quickly gathered fans who followed her life in Paris, the strained relationship with her partner and adventures with her toddler. And there was plenty of drama to watch: within a year her relationship had broken up, and she'd met a new man who wooed her online. Readers were mesmerised by her unflinching dedication to telling the whole story, no matter how she would be judged. Soon afterwards, however, Sanderson's employers found out about the blog and promptly fired her. Defeat turned into victory, however, with the press attention she gathered from the dismissal not only securing victory in an industrial tribunal, but also helping her score a lucrative two-book deal with Penguin. Least likely to post 'J'ai assez parle de moi, qu'est-ce que vous pensez?' petiteanglaise.com

37. Crooks and liars

Founded in 2004 by John Amato (a professional saxophonist and flautist), Crooks and Liars is a progressive/liberal-leaning political blog, with over 200m visitors to date, which is illustrated by video and audio clips of politicians and commentators on podiums, radio and TV. Readers post a variety of comments on political talking points of the day, although 9/11 conspiracy theories are often deleted, and there is a daily round-up of notable stories on other political blogs. Least likely to post 'So just what is a caucus?' crooksandliars.com

38. Chocolate and Zucchini

For Clothilde Dusoulier, a young woman working in computing and living in the Paris district of Montmartre, starting a blog was a way of venting her boundless enthusiasm for food without worrying she might be boring her friends with it. Five years later Chocolate and Zucchini, one of the most popular cooking blogs, has moved from being a hobby to a full-time career. The mixture of an insider's view on gastronomic Paris, conversational, bilingual writing and the sheer irresistibility of her recipes pull in thousands of readers every day. This, in turn, has led to multiple books and the ability to forge a dream career as a food writer.The name of the blog is, she says, a good metaphor for her cooking style: 'The zucchini illustrates my focus on healthy and natural eating... and the chocolate represents my decidedly marked taste for anything sweet.' Least likely to post 'Just add instant mash' chocolateandzucchini.com

39. Samizdata

Samizdata is one of Britain's oldest blogs. Written by a bunch of anarcho-libertarians, tax rebels, Eurosceptics and Wildean individualists, it has a special niche in the political blogosphere: like a dive bar, on the rational side of the border between fringe opinion and foam-flecked paranoid ranting. Samizdata serves its opinions up strong and neat, but still recognisable as politics. On the other side of the border, in the wilderness, the real nutters start. Least likely to post 'I'd say it's six of one, half a dozen of the other' samizdata.net

40. The daily dish

Andrew Sullivan is an expat Brit, blogging pioneer and defier-in-chief of American political stereotypes. He is an economic conservative (anti-tax), a social liberal (soft on drugs) and a foreign policy hawk (pro-war). He endorsed George Bush in 2000 and John Kerry in 2004. Barack Obama is his preferred Democrat candidate in 2008. So he is either confused, a hypocrite or a champion of honest non-partisanship – depending on your point of view. He is also gay, a practising Roman Catholic and HIV-positive, a set of credentials he routinely deploys in arguments to confuse atheist liberals and evangelical conservatives. Least likely to post 'Sorry, I can't think of anything to say' andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com

41. The F word

Founded in 2001, the UK's first feminist webzine is responsible for reviving debates around feminism in Britain. Edited by Jess McCabe, the site, which receives around 3,000 hits a day, is dedicated to providing a forum for contemporary feminist voices, with a daily news blog, features on stereotypes and censorship, podcasts on pornography and regular feminist film reviews. Least likely to post 'What's the difference between a woman and a condom?' thefword.org.uk

42. Jonny B's private secret diary

Growing in popularity since its debut in 2003, Jonny B's diary – which is clearly neither private nor terribly secret – catalogues the rock and bowls lifestyle of one man in the depths of rural Norfolk. With the mocking self-awareness of a modern Diary of a Nobody, the author tells tales of wild nights at the village pub and the fortunes of the local bowls team. As a slow, gentle satire on modern village life, it is often held up as an example of blog as sitcom, and has not only attracted a loyal band of readers, but a dedicated fan club on Facebook desperate to work out the real identity of the wit behind the site. Previous guesses have included Chris Evans and Johnny Vaughan, though both have been strenuously denied. Least likely to post 'OMG, I saw Jessica Simpson in Lidl and she signed my bum!' privatesecretdiary.com

43. Popjustice

When Smash Hits! died, Popjustice became the new home of pop music. Founded in 2000 by Peter Robinson, it combines fandom with music news and raw critique, all hilarious, and all blindingly correct. Recent features include a review of Eurovision failure Daz Sampson's new single 'Do A Little Dance' ('The listener is invited to muse on the sad inevitability of their own death') and a furious debate about the future of Girls Aloud. Least likely to post 'I prefer Pierre Boulez's interpretation of Mahler's third' popjustice.com

44. Waiter rant

Rant isn't quite the right word for this collection of carefully crafted stories from the sharp end of the service industry in a busy New York restaurant. 'The Waiter', as the author is known, has been blogging his experiences with fussy customers and bad tippers since 2004, winning a gong at blogging's biggest awards, the Bloggies, in 2007. It's representative – but by no means the first – of the so-called 'job-blogs', with people from all walks of life, from ambulance drivers (randomactsofreality.net) and policemen (coppersblog.blogspot.com) to the greatly loved but now defunct Call Centre Confidential. Between them they chronicle life in their trade, and usually from behind a veil of anonymity. Something about the everyday nature of The Waiter – a person we like to pretend is invisible or treat with servile disdain – deconstructing the event later with a subtle, erudite typestroke, has captured the public imagination and (hopefully) made some people behave better in restaurants than they otherwise might. Least likely to post 'The customer is always right' waiterrant.net

45. Hecklerspray

The internet's not exactly short of gossip websites providing scurrilous rumours of who did what to whom, but some stand out from the rest. Sharply written and often laugh-out-loud funny, Hecklerspray has been called the British alternative to Perez Hilton, but it's different in important ways: the emphasis here is on style and wit, with a stated aim to 'chronicle the ups and downs of all that is populist and niche within the murky world of entertainment'. Basically, it's gossip for grown-ups. Least likely to post 'If you can't say anything nice…' hecklerspray.com

46. WoWinsider

WoWinsider is a blog about the World of Warcraft, which is the most popular online role-playing game in the world, one for which over 10m pay subscriptions each month in order to control an avatar (a character, chosen from 10 races) and have it explore landscapes, perform quests, build skills, fight monsters to the death and interact with others' avatars. WoWinsider reports on what's happening within WoW ('Sun's Reach Harbor has been captured'). It also reports on outside developments and rumours ('A future patch will bring a new feature: threat meters'). Supporters of US presidential candidate Ron Paul promoted on WoWInsider their recent virtual mass march through the WoW. And the blog recently reported that America's Homeland Security are – seriously – looking for a terrorist operating within WoW. Least likely to post 'Who fancies a game of space invaders?' WoWinsider.com

47. Angry black bitch

Angry Black Bitch, which has the tagline, 'Practising the Fine Art of Bitchitude', is the four-year-old blog of Shark Fu of St Louis, Missouri. She has never posted a photo of herself and this 'anonymity' has led recently to her having to fend off claims she's really a white man, even a drag queen. But taken as read, Shark Fu is a much-discussed, 35-year-old black woman, tired of the 'brutal weight' of her 'invisibility'. Least likely to post 'I'm off to anger-management' angryblackbitch.blogspot.com

48. Stylebubble

Fashion blogger Susie Lau says Stylebubble is just a diary of what she wears and why. But few diaries are read by 10,000 people a day. Lau, 23, admits to spending up to 60 per cent of her pay from her day job in advertising on clothes, but now she's viewed as a fashion opinion former, she's being paid in kind. Her influence is such that fashion editors namecheck her blog, Chanel invites her to product launches and advertisers have come calling. Least likely to post 'I even wear my Ugg boots in bed' stylebubble.typepad.com

49. AfterEllen

Afterellen takes an irreverent look at how the lesbian community is represented in the media. Started by lesbian pop-culture guru Sarah Warn in 2002, the name of the site gives a nod to the groundbreaking moment Ellen DeGeneres came out on her hit TV show, Ellen, in 1997. Since then, lesbian and bisexual women have moved from the margins on to primetime TV, and this blog analyses the good, the bad and the ugly of how they're portrayed. It's now the biggest website for LGBT women, with half a million hits a month. Least likely to post 'George Clooney – I wouldn't kick him out of bed' afterellen.com

50. Copyblogger

It's dry, real, and deafeningly practical, but for an online writing-for-the-internet blog, Copyblogger, founded in 2006, is remarkably interesting. Swelling with advice on online writing, it's an essential tool for anyone trying to make themselves heard online, whether commenting on a discussion board or putting together a corporate website. Least likely to post 'Social networking – it's just a phase' copyblogger.com · Join the Debate: If you would like to comment about our choice of blogs, go to blogs.theguardian.com/digitalcontent · This article was amended on Friday March 14 2008. In the article above we wrongly said that Ryan Block founded Engadget and co-founded gadget blog Gizmodo. They were actually founded and co-founded by Peter Rojas. This has been corrected. Read the full article

#Fashionblogger #politicalblogging #post #Thehistory #WoWinsider

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hotspreadpage · 7 years ago

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This Week in Content Marketing: Marketing Associations to Blame Publishers for Allowing Bad Ads

PNR: This Old Marketing with Joe Pulizzi and Robert Rose can be found on both iTunes and Stitcher. If you enjoy our show, we would love it if you would rate it or post a review on iTunes.

In this week’s episode

This week, Robert ponders how we compare ourselves to others. In the news, we talk about a new initiative from three marketing associations that puts the blame for bad online advertising directly on the shoulders of publishers. We also discuss media companies’ rankings for brand loyalty – though these aren’t the media companies you’re looking for. Our rants and raves include Nielsen’s bid at measuring Netflix, and what we can learn from one-hit wonders; then we wrap up with an example of the week on the “Gary Vaynerchuk” of sustainable farming.

Download this week’s PNR: This Old Marketing podcast

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Show details

(00:01): An advertising blast from the past: “Gotta Be Pepsi Now!”

(00:30): Robert muses on this week’s theme: How do you compare?

(05:45): Welcome to Episode 206: Recorded live on October 23, 2017 (Running time: 1:05:58)

(11:38): Content Marketing Master Classes – Our multi-city tour is returning for another round of in-depth content marketing training. Starting on November 6, we’ll be making stops in Boston; New York; Washington, DC; Seattle; San Francisco; Chicago; Atlanta; and Austin, Texas. Robert and I would love to see you there, so register today.

Content love from our sponsor: Ahrefs (12:38)

Ahrefs is a powerful SEO tool set that has many amazing tools for content marketers who’re looking to grow their traffic from Google. With Ahrefs tools you can easily find out what people are searching for in Google, so you can create content around the most popular search queries. You can also discover content that got the most shares or earned the most backlinks, so you can piggyback from it and get the same results. And finally, you can easily research your competitors and find out which content brings them the most traffic from Google. Here’s an exclusive opportunity for PNR podcast listeners: Any listener who tweets using #ThisOldMarketing between the dates of September 30 through October 28 will be entered into a drawing to win an annual Ahrefs account plus a signed copy of Joe and Robert’s new book, Killing Marketing. One randomly selected participant will be drawn each week; four winners in total.

The quick hits – Notable news and trends

(14:28): Who are 2017’s top brands, ranked by customer loyalty? (Source: Marketing Charts)

(22:32): Publishers may have to “volunteer” in fight against annoying ads. (Source: AdAge)

The deep dive – Industry analysis

(28:14): Ad Age Ad Lib Podcast: Neil Vogel’s adventures as an accidental publisher. (Source: AdAge)

(34:40): Content marketing is dead. Long live marketing. (Source: Forbes)

Content love from our show sponsor: SnapApp (41:39)

Today’s buying committees are diverse; Millennials are already taking their seats among Generation X and Baby Boomers at the buying table, making navigating the already complicated buying environment even harder, thanks to their different preferences. Though this shift might seem minor, it greatly impacts how marketing teams operate, sales teams engage, and how purchase decisions are ultimately made.

SnapApp and Heinz Marketing recently conducted research to answer the question: How do different generations like to buy? Their report, “The Millennials Are Here! How Generational Differences Impact B2B Buying Committees Today” looks at the differences between the rising Millennial buyer, their Generation X and Baby Boomer counterparts, and how B2B marketing and sales strategies can address the gaps between them. Read the report.

Rants and raves

(44:02): Robert’s commentary: Nielsen is poised to start measuring the viewing audience of TV shows on Netflix. According to TechCrunch, the company’s new Subscription Video On Demand (SVOD) Content Ratings Service will base its measurements on panel surveys, comparable to how it estimates linear TV ratings. While Robert understands why Nielsen is looking at this audience, he feels they are going about it all wrong.

(48:36): Robert’s rave: Adweek profiles a new Burger King ad about tackling bullying that Robert simply loves. It’s feel-good advertising that handles the discussion of social issues in an elegant and effective way.

(50:50): Joe’s rave: James Altucher‘s podcast is a regular listen for me. The latest episode, featuring singer-songwriter Mike Posner, is a particularly interesting one for a few reasons, including his discussions on updating his older content, and a process he uses, which I would call an influencer marketing strategy.

This Old Marketing example of the week

(56:40): Polyface Farms: A reader recently referred Robert to the story of Joel Salatin, a second-generation farmer in Virginia who grew up watching his parents struggle to maintain their family farm. Though the Salatin Family had already started to explore organic farming and more humane farm animal practices at Polyface Farms, they were finding it even more difficult to turn a profit while using these techniques. However, once Joel took over the business, he committed himself to taking these practices to the next level, while increasing the farm’s profitability at the same time. He started by answering questions and offering advice to his fellow farmers to increase their understanding of the benefits of greener, more sustainable farm operations, and the idea quickly took off. Eventually, he turned his education platform into books, lectures, and other published content works. Years later, Joel Salatin is one of the most famous and successful farmers in the world, with a content portfolio that includes live tour experiences at his farm, as well as recipe of the week competitions, and other user-generated content initiatives. By creating a media brand to drive the success of his sustainable farming business, Joel has built Polyface Farms into a quintessential Content Inc.-style example of This Old Marketing. (Sources: Permaculture; Virginia Tech’s Virginia Cooperative Extension; VCU Office of Sustainability).

Image source

For a full list of PNR archives, go to the main This Old Marketing page. Cover image by Joseph Kalinowski/Content Marketing Institute

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lucyariablog · 7 years ago

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This Week in Content Marketing: Marketing Associations to Blame Publishers for Allowing Bad Ads

PNR: This Old Marketing with Joe Pulizzi and Robert Rose can be found on both iTunes and Stitcher. If you enjoy our show, we would love it if you would rate it or post a review on iTunes.

In this week’s episode

Download this week’s PNR: This Old Marketing podcast

Show details

(00:01): An advertising blast from the past: “Gotta Be Pepsi Now!”

(00:30): Robert muses on this week’s theme: How do you compare?

(05:45): Welcome to Episode 206: Recorded live on October 23, 2017 (Running time: 1:05:58)

Content love from our sponsor: Ahrefs (12:38)

The quick hits – Notable news and trends

(14:28): Who are 2017’s top brands, ranked by customer loyalty? (Source: Marketing Charts)

(22:32): Publishers may have to “volunteer” in fight against annoying ads. (Source: AdAge)

The deep dive – Industry analysis

(28:14): Ad Age Ad Lib Podcast: Neil Vogel’s adventures as an accidental publisher. (Source: AdAge)

(34:40): Content marketing is dead. Long live marketing. (Source: Forbes)

Content love from our show sponsor: SnapApp (41:39)

Rants and raves

This Old Marketing example of the week

Image source

For a full list of PNR archives, go to the main This Old Marketing page. Cover image by Joseph Kalinowski/Content Marketing Institute

How do I subscribe?

The post This Week in Content Marketing: Marketing Associations to Blame Publishers for Allowing Bad Ads appeared first on Content Marketing Institute.

from http://contentmarketinginstitute.com/2017/10/blame-publishers-bad-ads/

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mapstudiodesign-blog · 6 years ago

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