#I wonder if it’s like other people see someone use it
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One thing I want to add for the writers out there is that, because I'm blind on the same side as my dominant hand, it changes the way that I shoot a gun/bow and arrow. Even though I'm right handed, if I shoot something like a shotgun or bow, then I need to use a left handed grip/position in order to aim, which made things a bit awkward and unnatural for me to learn. Even though I have never shot right handed with these types of weapons, I will still sometimes automatically pick it up in a right handed grip and have to realize my mistake when I go to aim.
I do, however, shoot right handed with handguns specifically, because I have the freedom to align it with my left eye!
Also, in case you were thinking it: no, I've been blind since birth, I did not shoot my eye out lol. And I'm also a great shot in spite of my depth perception. I'm always closing one eye!
writing advice for characters with a missing eye: dear God does losing an eyes function fuck up your neck. Ever since mine crapped out I've been slowly and unconsciously shifting towards holding my head at an angle to put the good eye closer to the center. and human necks. are not meant to accommodate that sorta thing.
#im gonna add extra stuff in the tags bcus i dont want to make this post 12 miles long#this post is a fascinating read because i was born blind in one eye#so its interesting to see what someone who wasnt blind before notices as being different#or what they strugle with#because i completely forgot that when i was a kid#going down stairs was a big deal to me#but like i knew it was not a big deal for others so like i quietly would resolve myself and just go#and since ive been blind since birth#i wonder if ive just bypassed the neck pain because my body developed alongside the way that i hold my head#but i never considered that would be a problem for others#sorry op but this particular human's neck actually is built for this lol#although something i am conscious of is that i hate walking next to people on my blind side#because i have to use so much brain power keeping track of where they are not just from glancing over at them but like#im listening to hear if they are farther or closer#bcus i dont want to keep looking over at them all the time#also i love when my friends make jokes about my eye/being blind ive never heard someone make a joke that actually felt hurtful/insulting#(im sure not everyone would feel that way especially if they werent blind since birth but like. its funnyyyyy.... make a jooooke....)
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There goes my baaaabyyyy | Multiple Characters
Characters: Isagi Yoichi, Bachira Meguru, and Sae Itoshi
Summary: After seeing an abundance of tiktoks about the Usher trend, you decide to try it out on your unsuspecting boyfriend after a while of not seeing him
Warnings: This is the author's attempt at being funny so crack ahead. I apologize in advance.
A/N: Idk what came over me today, but I decided to waste my time writing this anyways after getting inspired by this amazing slideshow on tiktok talking about how each Haikyuu character would react to you doing the Usher trend. This is also my first time writing for Sae ( and I also know virtually nothing about him as I've only seen season 1 of Blue Lock ) so I'm sorry if he's ooc. I just realllyyy wanted to add him as I've been thirsting over edits of him ( and Reo ) for the past day or so.
A sigh of relief escapes through the chapped lips of the soon-to-be world cup competitor Isagi Yoichi. After hard fought battles during the preliminaries and all the stress and trials that come with it, it was finally the time for Isagi to return to his safe haven. He was hesitant for a time as he was still riding the adrenaline rush and wanted to stay back and train with some of the others, but since Bachira was returning to Japan to visit his mom and celebrate with her, it reminded him that he also had someone to return home to; you.
And so, after the longest thirteen hour flight of his life, he was now walking, suitcase in hand, alongside his best friend as the two of them exited the baggage claim and was nearing the lounge where you were allegedly waiting for him.
It had been so long since he's seen you, touched you—held you.. He finds himself wondering, how much has changed? Has your laugh changed at all? Have you switched up your sense of style? Maybe your hair? Do you still taste like the honeyed, buttered pancakes you used to make him every morning? Is your smile still so wide that it creases your cheeks and makes them pudge out more? Do your eyes still gaze at him as if he was made out of gold like they used to?
As he dwells on his thoughts, the yearning for you seeps in more and more like oil filling up a tank. It's heavy and it's only when he's just about to succumb to the weight of it all that he realizes just how much he's truly missed you.
And it seems that he wasn't alone in this feeling.
As he stepped into the lounge, he's met with his first and only warning. A warning that came in the familiar tune of the audio of a certain tiktok you had sent him a week prior before you came sliding his way on your knees. Your voice raised to match the exact pitch of the audio as you sung the infamous lyrics until you came to an abrupt halt when you collided with his stomach, nearly knocking him over with the force you hit him with.
And the only thing he could fathom to do was to stare like a deer in headlights and say, "Uh...what in the world?!"
Bachira couldn't possibly hope to contain his laughter any longer after that.
After seconds of Bachira's wheezing and airless chuckles, it was only when he was beginning to grip his stomach from the pain of his amusement that Isagi finally realized what just happened. And when he did, his entire face flushed a cherry red.
"What- Why are you doing this right now of all time?" He asked, semi-shouting as he grabbed the upper part of your arms—which were wrapped around his waist.
"I missed you, baby~!" You said in a sing-songy voice. And, as you looked up at him with your eyes shining with the familiar gleam he knew just as that same trophy-awarding smile stretched across your face, he found himself faltering for a moment. His shoulders slumping as he began mumbling shyly..
"I- I.. I missed you too.. But please, get up! People are starting to give us weird looks.."
Three months. That's how long it's been since you've last seen him.
Well, that's technically not true. If you wanted to be less dramatic, you could admit that you saw your boyfriend just last week on tv doing his signature dribbling moves and if you wanted to really be frank, you had seen his gorgeous face up close just the other day when he facetimed you and informed you that he'll be home that following afternoon. You could also make it sound much less extreme by simply confessing that you had regularly spoke to Bachira throughout these three months via text and that he'd facetime you at least one a week.
But you didn't want to count any of that.
I mean, sure you got to see him, but you didn't really get to see him. You weren't able to kiss his cheek whenever they perked up and flushed pink. You couldn't run your fingers through his layered hair and watch the satisfying transition of his brown strands turn yellow between your fingertips. You weren't able to hold his chin and watch in awe and fondness as he laughed toothily like a baby kitten..
You haven't seen him, not in all his glory which, to you, was like not seeing him at all. That said, three months of that torture was unbearable.
But all of that pain was forgotten in a matter of seconds at the odd sound of drums playing in the distance.
You didn't have any time to react to—or rather, process—what was happening or prepare yourself before Bachira got a running start towards you and soon dropped to his knees, sliding the rest of the way up to you with the biggest smile on his face—all while Usher's voice boomed behind him from his back pocket.
You had no choice but to accept fate and allow the love of your life to crash into you and completely knock you to the ground.
As the biting cold of the airport's tiles crept up your skin and all the air was just about knocked from your lungs from unexpectedly hitting the flat surface, Bachira stared down at you from above, cheeks dusted pink which made him look like an excited little kid.
"Hey, babe! It's been so long!" He chirped before coming down to press all his weight onto you as he caged your torso with his arms, his face immediately nearing yours to press a big, wet kiss to your cheek.
If it had been any other situation that he had done this in, you'd probably be annoyed from the embarrassment of having basically half the airport staring at the two of you like you were a bunch of buffoons or, at the very least, the fact that his team was laughing up a storm in the background...but having been as starved of him as you were, all you could do was laugh while relishing in the feeling of his warmth consuming every part of your body as he leaned down again to plant a feverish kiss to your lips.
Feet tapped against the small tile floors of the elevator, thumping against the marble in a rhythm that embodied the very dread of its owner.
After months of dreading this day, Sae had, once again, stepped foot in Japan; a notion he refused to even utter aloud from just how much he despised it.
For a man with such negative opinions about his homeland, his reasons for coming back were quite frivolous in comparison. Though if asked, he lie and say that his passport expired—which wasn't wrong—but deep down he knew the real reason for his return; his partner who he was too prideful to call the love of his life.
It had took some time, and for a while, Sae was forced to come back here every other year or so in secret to visit them per their request, but at last, they had decided that so much time waiting for his semi-yearly visits were too much for their poor heart and that they were ready to take the next step and leave with him to Spain.
Sae had pushed the thought to the very back of his mind, but he was more than glad—overjoyed, even—when you told him of your decision over the phone as he himself was starting to grow restless without you by his side at times.
He had already went through the process of renewing his passport so all that was left was to pick you up and drive to the airport—well, get driven to the airport—where he could finally leave this horrendous country, this time with you snuggled up by his side.
But he should've known that you wouldn't have let things be so simple.
As the doors to the elevator opened and allowed him to, at last, step foot into your lavish home, the symphony of his demise began to rang throughout it and bounce of the walls. Sae paused, face contorting into one of visible perplexment before his eyes widened at the sight of you sliding on your knees towards him, mouth opened as you sang to the beat of the music blasting throughout your home.
Your performance was short, glorious, and came to an end when your face was buried into the smooth fabric of your boyfriend's clothing and you smoothly wrapped your arms around your boyfriend's waist.
And it was only a full minute after such an amazing performance that it finally dawned on him what you were doing. And to that, he simply sighs disappointedly.
"I've changed my mind. You're not going anywhere with me," He said, and despite the blunt tone he douses his words in, it does little to your dazzling smile as you knew full well his words held little weight to them. You find yourself playing into your own bullshit anyways, though, as you begun to whine out in a high pitch you just knew he couldn't stand.
"Aww, but why? All I did was greet my pookie--" "Finish that sentence and I will actually leave you in Japan for another ten years."
You promptly shut your mouth after that, much to Sae's relief.
Dividers were made by me, pictures used are from Pinterest, post formatting is inspired by @xxsabitoxx
#blue lock#bllk#blue lock x reader#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#bllk x reader#bllk x y/n#bllk x you#blue lock scenarios#blue lock fluff#bllk scenarios#bllk fluff#crack fic#isagi yoichi#bachira meguru#itoshi sae#sae itoshi#isagi yoichi x reader#bachira meguru x reader#itoshi sae x reader#sae itoshi x reader#blue lock isagi#bllk isagi#blue lock bachira#bllk bachira#blue lock sae#bllk sae
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And I continue again with another OC ask thing that nobody but myself asked.
Because it's fun!
This time again with Sammy, the walking contradiction! A vampire hunter turned vampire against her will!
Because I love her--
vvvvvvvvvvvvvvv This gal vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv
1. Are you superstitious?
SM: That would mean putting my fate in the hands of someone or something else. No.
2. Would you be phased about walking under a ladder?
SM: No.
3. What would you do if a black cat crossed your path?
SM: ...Nothing? What does it matter?
4. How would you react if you broke a mirror?
SM: Depends on who it belonged to.
5. Do you avoid any certain number? If so, which ones? Why?
SM: Not a fan of 7... dunno why. It makes me mad.
6. What's your favorite cryptid?
SM: If there's any that doesn't mess with people, then that one. Otherwise, I hate all of 'em.
7. Would you ever go cryptid hunting? If so, why?
SM: ...You're asking me? The vampire hunter? Gee, I wonder why I do it?!
8. What do you think about ghosts?
SM: Depends on the type. Some are tragic, others not so much.
SM: Johnny knows more about this kind of stuff. I just do my job.
9. Have you ever seen a ghost?
SM: ...What're ya, a cop? Not telling.
10. Have you ever gone ghost hunting? If so, why?
SM: ...Yes, I have. Because it's kind of necessary for me-- us. Its annoying that I have to state that out loud, thought it'd be obvious.
11. What do you think about magic? Are you generally in favor or against it?
SM: Cheating. Dirty tricks for cowards that can't do anything by themselves. It corrupts the mind and leads you to become complacent. That's why THEY use it.
12. Do you know any magic? If so, is it a natural or learned skill?
SM: Even if I know it, that doesn't mean I'd use it. Or want to use it. Much rather put my trust in steel and silver.
13. What would you say would be your favorite use of magic?
SM: The only good use of magic is keeping it locked up.
14. Have you ever made a deal with a magical or supernatural entity?
SM: IT. WAS. NOT. A DEAL.
15. What form would your familiar take?
SM: A grenade. So I can blow it up alongside my target, and never see it again.
16. Have you ever traveled into the past, and so, what did you change?
SM: No. If only...
17. Have you ever traveled into the future, and if so, how was it like?
SM: No. The only future I have is in the grave, once this is all over.
18. Have you ever had a prophetic vision or dream, and if so, what was it like?
SM: None that I recall.
19. Have you ever had an astral projection or out of body experience?
SM: No. Johnny says he has though, and with how weird that kid is, its probably true.
20. Have you ever visited another plane of reality or existence, and if so, what was it like?
SM: No.
21. Have you ever attended a seance or used a ouija board? What happened?
SM: I think I did it once with my old friends. The details are... blurry, though.
22. Do you keep things like salt, garlic or silver on hand for defensive purposes?
SM: Salt is more Johnny's thing. Says it's spiritual protection or something. Can never go wrong with some silver, though. Punch a good hole into a bloodsucker with ease. The garlic thing though? Totally fake. If its not blood, they can't smell it.
23. Have you ever cleansed your surroundings with sage or holy water?
SM: Again, more Johnny's thing. I can't even stand the thought of holy water.
24. Do you believe in the existence of extraterrestrials? If so, why?
SM: I didn't believe Johnny at first, but then I saw them.
25. Do you believe in any conspiracy theories? And if so, which ones and why?
SM: When you're unaware of what's goin' on behind the curtain, it's easy to discard any theory as baloney. Take a peek, and you'll never doubt again.
26. What would you do if you came face to face with a rabid zombie?
SM: Same as I do with any bloodsucker. Fill it with silver, then tear it apart limb by limb. My only regret would be not being able to make it suffer more.
27. Would you allow a vampire into your home?
SM: My father did. Once.
28. Have you ever witnessed a werewolf transformation?
SM: Yeah. It was like watching vampirification take place in the span of a couple of seconds.
29. How likely is it that you would be charmed and fall prey to mermaids?
SM: Null. Flesheaters are the same as bloodsuckers. No mercy for either.
30. What supernatural creature would you most prefer to be?
SM: Anything else, but this.
you: me: me: here’s a weird oc ask meme involving various mysterious, supernatural, and paranormal subjects that you can fill out on your own or with the help of your followers 👽✌
(01) Is your OC superstitious? (02) Would your OC be phased about walking under a ladder? (03) What would your OC do if a black cat crossed their path? (04) How would your OC react if they broke a mirror? (05) Does your OC avoid any certain numbers? If so, which ones, and why?
(06) What is your OC’s favorite cryptid? (07) Would your OC ever go cryptid hunting? Why or why not? (08) What does your OC think about ghosts? (09) Has your OC ever seen a ghost? (10) Would your OC ever go ghost hunting? Why or why not?
(11) What does your OC think about magic? Is your OC generally for or against magic? (12) Does your OC know any magic? If so, is it a natural talent or a learned skill? (13) What would your OC say would be their favorite use for magic? (14) Has/would your OC ever made a deal with a magical or supernatural entity? (15) What form does/would your OC’s familiar take?
(16) Has your OC ever traveled into the past? If so, did they change anything? (17) Has your OC ever traveled into the future? If so, what was it like? (18) Has your OC ever had a prophetic vision or dream? If so, what did they see? (19) Has your OC ever had an out of body experience or astral projected? (20) Has your OC ever visited another plane of reality or existence? If so, was it by choice?
(21) Has your OC ever attended a seance or used a ouiji board? What happened? (22) Does your OC keep things like salt, garlic, or silver on hand for defensive purposes? (23) Has your OC ever cleansed their surroundings with things like sage or holy water? (24) Does your OC believe in the existence of extraterrestrials? Why or why not? (25) Does your OC believe any conspiracy theories? If so, which ones, and why?
(26) What would your OC do if they were face to face with a rabid zombie? (27) Would your OC allow a vampire into their home? (28) Has your OC ever witnessed a werewolf transformation? (29) How likely is it that your OC would be charmed by and fall prey to mermaids? (30) What supernatural creature would your OC most prefer to be?
#self reblog#oc ask meme#OC stuff#i will do this too with all my other characters#BECAUSE I CAN GHYAHYAHYAHAYA
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like no one else can
ೃ࿐ boynextdoor as your situationship
this was fun to write,,i was wondering if i should make individual fics abt this...what do yall think? ^__^ feedbacks and comments are appreciated ! and also my ask is always open if u wnna chitty chat <3
warnings: fluff, intense pining, light angst, signs of red flags
wc per member: ~250-400
sungho
“i’m trying to understand what am i to you?”
𓍯 situationship with sungho would be filled with a lot of "almosts" that keep you guessing, excitement, and unexpected outcomes. he would have this easygoing, carefree attitude as if he truly enjoyed your time together, but he’s also hard to pin down. he would bring you as his ‘plus one’ to parties or events and he has once invited you to a family outing “as a friend”
𓍯 sungho likes to do actions that you couldn’t help but assign meanings to these little things. he would give you a bite of his food in between laughter and throw tiny comments such as “i thought about you the other day.” the way he laughs at your jokes, recalls small details you mention, and checks up on you in between classes makes you question if he does the same with other people. if you didn't witness him opening doors for people, helping classmates with their homework, and giving the same endearing smile to anyone in need, it would be quite easy to convince yourself that the things he did to you meant something.
𓍯 when you mention being cold, he casually throws his hoodie over your shoulders and says, "just give it back whenever." yet it stays with you for days and he doesn't bring it up either, as if sharing his hoodie has become a relationship between you two. but when you decide to give it back, your heart aches to see another girl wearing his hoodie.
𓍯 the combination of highs and unanswered questions would be thrilling, and his charm would entice you to return for more. but the question “what am i to you” hangs in the open air because then, if you really meant something to him, he wouldn’t have treated others the same way he did to you.
𓍯 was it mutual at some point? maybe, or maybe not.
riwoo
“i know it’s casual but i look for you in a room full of people”
𓍯 likes having alone time with you. plans a hang out with your friends to watch a movie but the truth is he didn't invite anyone else just so he could watch the movie and spend time alone together. at the end of the movie, you'd just be wiping off your lips because you spent the whole time making out.
𓍯 situationship with riwoo is almost like a secret. he knows how to pull you towards him, and the relationship has you on chokehold. most of the time, he makes moves that make you question the very foundation of your relationship. he acts like he likes you. but does he actually do?
𓍯 during a chill drinking celebration at your friends' house, both of you always find a reason to text each other even if you're literally in the same room. that one time when you were seated a little too far from him, he pulls out his phone, typing under the table making sure no one gets a peak of his message, he would send you, "you're too far from me :(" it seems as though the thread that binds you is stronger than everything else, and every communication feels like a secret that only the two of you know. you'd look up from your phone to give him a glance and he gives you a subtle look—the look that even when you try to look away, you could feel his eyes settled on you.
𓍯 his red flag would probably be saying things like, "would you be jealous if i went out with someone else?" or talking about his ex. but right when he gives you enough reasons that he's not good for you, he pulls the "what would it take for us to stop pretending this isn’t more than casual?" card.
jaehyun
“you say we’re just friends but why do you look at me like that when no one’s around?”
𓍯 when you clearly don’t look like you’re just friends but it’s becoming a running joke now–jaehyun responds without skipping a beat whenever someone arches an eyebrow and asks if there is more going on between you and him. he casually replies, “we’re just friends.” and each time you force a smile that falls short of your eyes, you nod along.
𓍯 jaehyun has this habit of leaning towards you whenever he laughs, sometimes his head falls on your shoulder for a moment which kinda makes you flinch during the first few times but now that you’re used to it, you let your heads touch each other when you laugh together.
𓍯 when he spots you alone leaning outside the glass door at a party, you feel his presence slowly approaching you and then he simply stands there in comforting silence, staring at you in that familiar way, without saying anything at first. when you told him that you get more comfortable attending parties because he’s around, he’d flash a smirk, and his eyes return to the expression he always gives you when no one else is there. jaehyun looks intensely at your face as if he’s searching for something–searching for a sign.
𓍯 you can’t resist yourself to ask him a question if he’s sure about it. “sure about what?” his tone is gentle, and the corner of his mouth twitches as if he clearly understands what you are saying. “sure that we’re just friends…” you replied. jaehyun pauses before responding. he just looks at you, his eyes darting to your lips and back to your eyes, a spark there that he tries to conceal but can't quite get rid of. he lets out a tense and nervous laugh. “yeah, we’re just friends.” but his words were laced with hesitation and uncertainty. and there you thought, maybe the look he gives you is enough, for now.
taesan
“you treat me like this because you know you're my weakness.”
𓍯 taesan knows how flustered you get when he touches you. during lunchtime with your other friends, you tried to ignore how he sat closer to you than usual. when your friends make a joke and others laugh along, you try so hard to focus but you just can’t seem to grasp the fact that his knees and yours were touching. then, his fingertips lightly touched your leg, so gentle at first that you nearly questioned whether it was an accident. however, taesan’s hand becomes steady and warm, and you can only sense his calm presence. you attempt to maintain a neutral appearance on the outside as your heart twitches and your mind attempts to process the unexpected sensation. his smile is as laid-back as ever, and he continues to laugh with the group as if this is nothing unusual.
𓍯 situationship with taesan can be a little frustrating. he likes to give you mixed signals. he’s mostly all about you most of the time and he holds eye contact like you’re the only person he could see. but then the next day, he barely acknowledges your presence. he’s quiet and doesn’t speak to you. but you know what’s bad for you? the fact that you'd fold immediately bcs he really just knows how to give you butterflies right when you think he’s not interested. taesan would come up behind you, whispering to your ear saying, “i missed you today.” and you would quickly fold like you didn't just question everything about him.
𓍯 at some point, the feelings were mutual. but you got tired of going around in circles waiting for nothing to happen, so you just decided to move on and bury your feelings just to keep the friendship.
leehan
“teach me how to not care about these feelings that keep me up at night for nothing.”
𓍯 you don’t talk everyday but that’s what makes everything thrilling. and when you do talk, texting usually lasts until 3am. although you can feel the weight of your eyelids by this time, you try to stay awake just to converse with him. conversations with leehan are almost raw, something about each message is intimate—one you probably wouldn’t hear in the daylight. the thought that he actually also stays up with you makes you wonder how much he’s also feeling.
𓍯 leehan has the subtlest way of making you laugh. he’s nonchalant but he’s the type to make you intrigued without fully committing. with that being said, he knows when to pull back when he thinks you’re getting a little too attached over a situationship even if he's the one responsible for making you feel that way
𓍯 after dates, goodbyes often linger in the air. both of you enjoyed too much to actually walk away and go back home. when he stands close enough to hug you, you could feel his hand linger on your back like he’s in no rush to go back home. both of you stood there quiet, glancing at each other, enough to decipher by the look of your eyes that there are still unsaid words. “i’ll text you when i get back home.” he holds both of your hands as they slightly brush away from yours whenever he takes a step back. you know yourself you want something more from this situationship which causes your heart to ache.
𓍯 leehan is still not letting go of your hand even at the point where your fingertips are only touching each other. “let’s do that next time.” he says and adds, “sleep over.”
𓍯 and when he actually gets back home, you don't receive a text from him at all, and talked again the following days like nothing happened.
woonhak
"why does it feel like we’re both waiting for the other to make the first move?"
𓍯 it’s painfully obvious that both of you like each other. neither of you just couldn’t bring yourself up to confess. there’s always this tension that hangs heavy in the air when you’re with him. you're lounging on his couch while watching a film. with his shoulder almost touching yours, he is closer than friends should be. the couch's modest size is a flimsy excuse, but you both know there's more to it. woonhak’s arm occasionally moves, grazing yours and giving you a shiver, but he doesn't pull away. both of you are dancing around that invisible line, on the brink. his hand is getting closer and closer till your fingers would touch if you both moved even a little.
𓍯 every time you're together, you experience this torturous pulling, waiting for the other to finally release the tension that has been building for weeks. his hand moves next to yours, his fingers flexing as though he wants to grab you but isn't quite brave enough. and you can't help but wonder whether you're both simply waiting for a sign, anything that would eventually allow one of you to cross that line.
𓍯 woonhak constantly teases you, looking for excuses to rub your hair or bump into your shoulder, and he enjoys seeing how you respond to his pranks. he says something, though, that takes you entirely by surprise just when you think it's all a friendly act.
𓍯 “i feel like we’re both good at being complicated.” he chuckles. you can sense that you're both still holding back and skirting the truth because you're afraid of altering something that feels so near-perfect. but when you meet his eyes, you can see that this isn't the end of it because of the little warmth that remains in his smile.
#boynextdoor#chewnotchoke works#boynextdoor scenarios#boynextdoor fluff#myung jaehyun fluff#riwoo fluff#taesan fluff#woonhak fluff#leehan fluff#sungho fluff#myung jaehyun#riwoo#park sungho#han taesan#leehan#woonhak#myung jaehyun x reader#riwoo x reader#taesan x reader#woonhak x reader#sungho x reader#leehan x reader#boynextdoor x reader#boynextdoor imagines#boynextdoor taesan#boynextdoor riwoo#boynextdoor jaehyun#boynextdoor leehan#boynextdoor sungho#boynextdoor woonhak
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LOA IS A CULT. Everyone Including myself and those who are familiar with it, know it’s a cult! I know everyone lies for attention or to live in the end because I used to be a big blogger myself. I won't reveal who I was, but I saw firsthand how these bloggers, claiming to be friends in real life, are actually deceiving everyone—they're all liars. Behind the scenes, they're working regular jobs while curating content from friends and family to share as their own as proof. Many of them have multiple accounts and blogs to give the illusion of authenticity. If you don't believe me, create a fake account and replicate the process—fabricate a success story, and watch as bloggers emerge from the shadows seeking help. Most of them have disappeared now... I wonder why that is, lol. It's time to open your eyes to the reality behind these façades and question the true motives driving this deceitful tumblr .
Despite the presence of manifestors, witches, and astrologists manifesting against Donald Trump in the world it's amusing to see that he still emerged victorious and by a whole lot!!!
It's worth noting that among the founders of the law of assumption and the void state on platforms like Tumblr, inconsistencies and inaccuracies have surfaced in their stories over time – there seems to be a trend of untruthfulness, among them (it might be interesting for you to verify this observation by checking out posts from your favorite bloggers, especially the newer ones; I've taken a look and it appears they're all just making their posts using GPT !
"Persist with belief"; A call to continue holding onto faith and dedication similar, to how spiritual groups encourage their followers to stay steadfast in their beliefs.
“Embrace the mysterious without needing evidence." This mindset echoes the inclination towards accepting the unknown and intangible elements of existence often upheld by certain groups that prioritize faith in the unseen, over concrete proof.
Echoing the cults claims of enlightenment or salvation, without tangible evidence but guaranteeing miraculous transformations assures me of its validity.
Despite the uncovering of deceit and dishonesty by individuals within a system built on mistruth; trust and belief persist unshaken. Mirroring the resilience shown by groups, in the face of revealed falsehood.
"When someone blindly follows something or someone else – it's, like trusting without proof of why or how things work out in the end."
“Discover the truth within yourself”. Encouraging the exploration of truths and insights through belief in something greater; a familiar motif, in spiritual practices.
Encouraging connection, with the energy of the universe is a spiritual idea that highlights the importance of harmonizing with greater forces beyond our sight.
"Fulfill your destiny"; The concept of shaping your own future through faith alone is frequently referenced in spiritual communities as a means to claim authority, over your own life path.
“Rise above the boundaries of the realm " suggesting the possibility of surpassing earthly restrictions through belief in something greater; mirroring stories of spiritual groups seeking elevated levels of existence.
Calling upon the power of the Encouraging believers to tap into mystical powers is a common theme, in teachings of spiritual groups that offer promises of special intervention or extraordinary abilities.
These instances provide insight into the use of language, with spiritual cult like tendencies that focus on faith and commitments that extend beyond tangible proof.
Please, there are bloggers out there sharing and telling us to save Palestine, claiming you can manifest a trillion dollars out of thin air, yet they can't manifest an end to war or even a simple solution. They say you can't control other people, yet they talk about manifesting specific people,, changing your family completely, or even your own race. You all were claiming you were manifesting Harris. I thought manifestation never fails, loool. "Oh, just persist, it will reflect like Neville leaving the war," they say, but all Neville managed could very well fall under the coincidence category, just like healing a burned hand, hahahahah. It's baffling that people are wasting their lives on something they know deep down is false. For the children in this community, just stick to a routine, focus on school and work, and foster your own life. While doing so, perhaps listen to subliminals, but don't rely on these vicious lies. Your time and energy are too precious to be spent on such unfounded claims.
Before you start getting defensive in my comments, take a moment to think and tell me how long you've been manifesting. How long have you been persisting in this process? Share in the comments first, and reflect on how little has actually changed. When you ask questions of these bloggers, why do they always seem to victim blame you instead of providing real answers? They claim to love and care about you so much, yet they charge for subliminals and can't manifest even simple things like you entering the void state. They won't manifest for your mental health desires, despite all the supposedly enlightening infographics they share. They talk about being able to shift reality and consciousness, yet they can't offer real help. Isn't this just typical cult behavior? It's time to question the authenticity of these practices and recognize the inconsistencies.
Some of these bloggers are in their 20s and live on disability, which gives them both the time and money to spread misinformation and false hopes. If you're young and still have potential, please make wise choices. Some aspects of spirituality are indeed real, and manifesting can be a genuine practice, but remember there's a reason why 99% of these bloggers are deceitful. They all eventually leave before their lies catch up with them. It's a disgrace that they pretend to help you in their DMs while knowing you're struggling with issues like poverty and abuse. I truly hope things improve for you, but don't rely on this cult-like mentality.
Critics might come into the comments and claim you just have doubts, but that's not the case. Once I left the Law of Assumption and started genuinely working, studying, and ensuring my grades were satisfactory, my life changed. I got a boyfriend, landed my dream job, and even took steps towards my desired appearance with a nose job. These achievements didn’t just materialize from thin air; they came from hard work. I accomplished more in three months after leaving the cult than some do in five years. I know people who've been in this community for a decade—when will they wake up to reality? That nagging feeling of doubt is actually common sense trying to prevent you from ruining your life.
How many times are you going to think, "I can't tolerate my life; I'm just going to shift," before it becomes unbearable and you realize you're stuck? How many liars need to be exposed? How many times do people have to be scammed before they see the truth? The so-called void masters aren’t helping; if they could truly access the void, they'd expose the liars. But then they’d have to admit they're lying too, and that no one has achieved these creative writing promises. It's all for attention and affirming to manifest is not a magic solution.
Let's be real here—your favorite bloggers allowed the Turing administration to achieve a landslide victory, with the court gone, the Senate gone, the House gone, and the residence done. Project 2025 is in motion, but sure, everyone’s supposed to be GOD, right? You people are worse than religious fanatics. I secured my visa because I knew otherwise, I'd be stuck here; you can't rely on the fake law of assumption. Go ask your bloggers why Trump won, and they'll just tell you to persist or claim it's all an illusion. Seriously? We'll see how much of an illusion it is once Palestine is wiped off the map, and all these so-called void masters can do is make a note to ignore the 3D world, loool. It's absurd that they think such real-world issues can simply be brushed aside with wishful thinking. Time to question these beliefs and face reality.
This message isn't directed at the older members of this cult because, at this point, only you can wake yourself up. But to the younger ones, please focus on building your life in the actual world. It's very real, and your suffering will only worsen if you keep clinging to false hopes.
To all the bloggers who know they're spreading lies, go ahead and manifest that my post gets deleted. I apologize for even considering that some of you revise events where people have literally died. Try revising this post or imagine me apologizing. It's time to stop spreading deceit and start facing the truth. Your actions have consequences, and it's crucial to start acknowledging the reality of the world we live in.
Even those who claim to manifest outside of time are no different—they're all selling courses for hundreds of dollars each month, with packages reaching into the thousands. It's ironic, isn't it? They preach about manifesting abundance yet charge exorbitant fees for their wisdom. Just think about it for a moment: if they could truly manifest unlimited wealth and success, why would they need to profit off of your hard-earned money? The truth is, their business model depends on your belief in their promises, and they capitalize on that by offering overpriced courses that are often filled with recycled content. This practice raises questions about the authenticity of their teachings and whether they genuinely have your best interests at heart.
The feeling you’re having is your body and mind trying to tell you there's truth in what I'm saying. It's like they're working to save you from falling into the trap of delusions. You are caught up in loa and you’re actually caught up in their own illusions. Many of these successful loa folks outside of tumblr grew up in wealthy families, living good lives, and got richer with a mix of luck and hard work. That's why so much of this community feels ridiculous; it's mostly made up of kids chasing dreams and adults spinning lies or looking for attention because they have too much free time.
Society keeps these cycles going, making it easy to fool ourselves. The temptation of quick success and promises of an easy life are hard to resist, especially for those always surrounded by comfort and now searching for something deeper than just money. For some, the LOA community seems like a beacon of hope and purpose. But it's important to see that while some find value, others get caught in a loop of broken promises, clinging to the idea that just thinking positively will bring success without real effort.
This way of thinking can will you ppl away from reality, you’re following and worshipping people seeking likes and attention takes the place of real achievements. LOA IS A CULT. Please wake up
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I've been following this matter for a while now (a quick search of newspaper articles showed it's been floated since mid last year, and I remember having to use my passport to verify my age on my gmail (it's not the account I use for tumblr, the account has my name in the address, so it's already pretty clearly me, so I was begrudgingly okay with it but am still annoyed my other account now can't watch age restricted youtube videos unless I tie it to my identity)). It's a vexed issue.
The first thing I'd like to point out is that the person quoted in the above post ("I am 100 percent etc") is Keith Pitt, a member of the Nationals who was resources and water minister under Morrison. I feel this is important because while he'd definitely be someone who'd vote in support of the measure, he's not a member of the party in power, let alone a Cabinet minister. His opinion is not necessarily that of the Prime Minister ― Anthony Albanese ― and it makes it seem like what he's talking about is what the government is planning to do.
What is the PM actually saying they'll do?
To be honest, I don't think the government knows yet. From what I can gather, there has been no suggestion by the PM that they would force people's accounts to have their real names. The Age a few days ago reported this:
"Australia’s eSafety commissioner has instead recommended a “double-blind tokenised approach”, whereby information would be provided to a verifying third party that would certify the user’s age to social media platforms without revealing details about the child. The details of the plan are being worked through by a trial of age-verification technologies."
(the "instead" is in reference to the current practice of social media platforms asking people if they over 13, which I'm sure most people realise would stop pretty much no child)
In that same article though they also said "the government has not unveiled key details, including the technology that would be used to keep children out". So I think there is quite a bit of time before anything is going to be written into law.
While I don't think your name will be "slapped onto your tumblr account" (if that does end up being what they do I would actually delete my tumblr, I really do not want that), there is still the question of privacy being invaded in that the government would (I think? I'm not a tech expert in the slightest) be able to connect you to your account.
Keep in mind that we are close to an election (there's been whispers it could be May next year), and this is an issue that (as the Keith Pitt quote shows) both of the major parties seem to mostly agree on. A cynical view is that the PM is talking tough to neutralise the issue so it can't be attacked by the opposition for not protecting children. The fact that both are talking about it does however suggest it will eventually come to pass (unlike other complicated legislation that was touted as 'essential' but then got shelved after being too hard to get through (naming no names i.e. Scomo's religious discrimination bill).
The other point to discuss is that while I really do enjoy people not knowing who I am on tumblr (and people in my life not being able to know I'm on tumblr), I also don't really think kids should be on social media (or at least not in the way they currently are). I avoided social media (I only had a facebook account I barely touched) until I was an adult (and even then I waited a while) and I'm quite glad, mostly because I think I'm a lot more mature. On the other hand, while I didn't interact with people, I grew up in a time when you could browse most platforms without an account, so it's not like I wasn't exposed to things on the internet. And then there's a bit of a moral panic about the internet, which can be a bit overblown at times. But then I'll hear a 14 year old I know mentioning stuff that makes me think he's kind of obsessed with growing muscles and I wonder if he's seeing these sorts of things online. I mean, there's a lot of garbage on the internet. But there's a lot of really useful things too... it's complicated and I'm not settled on an opinion yet.
Kids really do need to learn better internet practices and behaviours, but there are also kids in primary school with social media accounts. I mean, what does a 12 year old do in their life that they need the world to see? (don't answer that it's rhetorical, I'm sure there are plenty of 12 year olds doing interesting things worth showing off, but I mean, beyond messaging friends, 12 year olds don't really need to be communicating with strangers on the internet). Note too it's specifically social media (the definition is given by OP but it's anything where the main purpose is share content or talk to a wide audience of people. Things like games with chat stuff are also being looked into.
I'm also a bit of a luddite and think kids should read more. I'm not actually trying to convince people the ban is good, I'm just thinking aloud here. The whole thing feels rather heavy-handed, brute-force, and there's every chance kids will still find ways around it. I don't think this is the ideal solution, but I do feel there is a problem to be addressed.
But yeah, do tell your local member that you are concerned and want to make sure your privacy is kept safe. Just be aware of who your member is and their/their party's stance (all Labor MPs vote with the party, Liberals and Nationals can vote against their own party, so they may not all be in agreement). The Greens are opposed to it. I am not sure what the teal independents think of it.
You may also want to contact some senators from your state, not just your MP.
As for the contents of the letter, maybe something like:
Dear Mr/Ms/Dr (whatever title they use) surname MP,
I am a resident of your electorate (electorate name). (Maybe say a little bit about yourself, just what you think is relevant to the letter or your arguments).
I am writing to you to discuss the proposed social media ban for children. I am concerned (explain what/why you are concerned).
(Try to keep it brief, but also try to be personal)
State what you want your MP to do. Ask them to reply to your letter.
Sincerely,
your name.
You may want to mail the letter rather than just emailing. This page from Oxfam I just looked up five minutes ago has some nice tips.
Hey Aussies, do you want your real name and ID slapped on your tumblr account? If the answer is fuck no, our gov’s got a upcoming legislation for banning 16 year olds and under from social media even WITH parental consent. And by “Social Media”…
The code defines social media as electronic services that meet the following conditions:
The sole or primary purpose of the service is to enable online social interaction between two or more end users
The service allows end users to link to, or interact with, some or all other end users
The service allows end users to post material on the service
Such other conditions (if any) as are set out in the legislative rules.
So. You know. Just the entire fucking internet. They even named youtube as banned, god forbid kids out in the bush get access to LGBTQ+ communities online when they could be watching adds for sportsbet.
I am 100 per cent supportive of eliminating bullying and fake information from online platforms. The easiest way to do that is to be able to utilise existing laws, and the easiest way to do that is to ensure there are no fake accounts. Your digital, online life is your real life. If you want to make comments, that's fine, but it should be as you, as a verified account. This means everyone knows who it is that makes those comments, that you can be found and prosecuted under existing laws, just as you would if you express those opinions in a newspaper, for example, or you went on to a television station and said something similar.
Contact an Aussie senator about this shit. They’re trying to slide it under all the USpol news.
#australian politics#I am starting to think I should make a sideblog specifically for politics#Also make sure to look things up when you see them being discussed on tumblr#go the ABC at least#people blindly believing things on tumblr is why MPs think these laws need to be introduced#not saying OP is wilfully misleading people just that it is a bit scaremongering#it's not terrible to spur people into action with a bit of fear#but if they think it's going to be one thing which it won't be then the government can just do the less scary but still bad thing#which it was going to do anyway#and it won't have broken any promises#Albo seems rather desperate to be a PM with a legacy#but he's been stymied and is cursed with terrible communication#I think he's decent but I fear the bar has been set very low after the previous three PMs#it reminds me of Sammy J's song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IqKAMMIMd1E#“Decent. adequate. good enough. suitable”
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XZ Album 《我们 WE》 early cpns.
you know we just need a few things to see and it’s a whole bunch of cpns we can produce after 😂😂😂 that’s the magic of being a turtle. lol. we may be interpreting this whole thing wrong but that’s usual when it comes to speculations we make and i think that’s the joy of it.
i’ll start of with this one that made me want to scream and cry:
i mean… shut up…. noooooo… wdym 😭😭😭
why you gotta pull the wei wuxian imagery like that. i’m very very weak for this. the writing mimics that of a red ribbon. of all things. tho the WM here as how fans interpret it and how i think xz intended it to is WM: WǒMen (我们) as in We/Us or WM: We and Me (我和“我们”) (Wǒ hé “Wǒmen”). not to mention that the color scheme of this red is 911005. his bday. everything is intentional.
but still. red ribbon. come on. who can blame us for clowning like this when he makes it so easy. it’s not a secret that the untamed and the role of wwx is important to him career wise and well *ehem* personally *ehem* because of a certain someone. if you don’t wanna look that far then just go with the W as in WANG. lol. and if it’s WM, M flipped is still W. so that’s how transfixed he is with the letter W. i wonder why. 👀
now we move on to the snippets of what the song means & how it’s making us think of wyb’s previous single everything is lovely ( which has a separate cpn too between them )
QQ music said this line connected to the album/song:
“About me, about you, about TA (him/her), or the relationship between people in this big city.”
this is pretty similar to the message of everything is lovely — it’s about appreciating everyone and looking at life and your surroundings as interconnected. they both have that sense in them. what we do and say, it has an effect and we are all related even if it’s a big city we live in. plus the use of TA which does not specify the gender. we love that! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
we get more of an expanded idea too via xzs post of the activity for the release. it mentioned a description. you can substitute the we to us if that reads better to you:
“Some people say that WE are close friends, cats and dogs waiting for us to come home every night are concrete in life.
Some people say that WE make friends with all kinds of emotions... are virtualization hidden inside the heart.
These characters of “ME”, and emotions form different "WE".
We are placed in a prism named "life", where light breaks it down into multi-faceted spaces. We travel through different spaces as lights flow and capture our own colors.
Starting from "Me", feel the intersection related to "Me", and then return to understand "self". What is the "we" behind "Me"?
A trace of emotion, a thing, a friend... The bits and pieces around "Me" all make up "We".
i think if you are someone who have been watching them for a while and the messaging they are sending out then you will see the common theme/connection here. the cats and dogs waiting for us to come home every night. that reminds me of the cpn that they have a cat and dog at home, at some point. and it’s what they want too. the interconnection of you/other people and appreciating everything around you, that’s the vibe i’m getting right now. of course we will know more one we have the song/s and the full lyrics and possibly some backstory from xz.
a coincidence too that the “me and we” is giving the same energy as “ u and i” which is in wyb’s weibo bio. which i know is something UNIQ related but there you go.
what’s more chilling i guess is the “we” was emphasized and used as a caption between them by hui-ge ( cpn about this fansite here which is a primer of sorts but there are other instances aside from what’s there ) which was i have a we / i have us. i mean. come on. too bad they haven’t posted in so long especially because fans were looking too much into them ( cpn about this photo/ post here )
the use of “we” which they have mistakenly said back in 2019 when talking about themselves:
other minor similarities:
* the concept of multiple xz and wyb through something prism/mirror like.
* both xz and ybo using similar captions which is not new but most importantly, starting an activity for fans to participate in. which i’m not sure but possibly other artists do too. but whatever, let’s add that 😂
* and the PINK! because pink is the color of love! what are the chances they will use the same color?
lastly, one of the release dates is 11/19. and as cpfs we have a whole story about that and it’s nice that we get to continue that timeline. cpfs think it’s a confirmation of the importance of this date too ^^
-END.
i surely missed some things on here and that’s fine. if something important comes up i will make a separate post! i’m so excited for this month! xz really blessed us 🥹🥹🥹😅
#yizhan#bjyx#i didn’t intend for this post to be THIS long blame it on xz#there is no science here i’m just clowning like i always do
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So, I think it is finally time for a whole history regarding the black goo guy. I put lots of thought into how the thing plays into the rise lore! I can finally share it!
First thing is first, the creation of the Key when the krang had first arrived.
Simple enough, make key trap krang who have invaded the planet into it. But. I have always wondered, how did they manage to get every single krang on the planet at that time into the key?
By this point I feel that the krang were at least somewhat spread around the area, and there were more of them than just the 3 we saw in the movie. I do not think they fought every single one to cram into a key.
So along side the key, they needed to also create a device to command that would spread around the world and obtain only krang, to put into the key. They ended up creating the goop guy. This would also explain the sort of ick-like look that the movies visuals had when trapping the krang.
The black thing they created worked! It did its job! Spread around the world and collected every krang on the planet to shove into the key! But now what?
The collecting creation grew impatient, what was its purpose now that its job was complete? So to the dismay of the 4 warriors at that time it began collecting and containing other things.. the 4 warriors saw the dark turn that their creation had taken, and decided that it needed a trap too.
A box, they just made a simple box. Its location is in Japan. People could enter and exit the box fine and ask questions but the black ick creation was trapped. Generations passed, the 4 warriors moved on, and the origin of the strange thing in the box was forgotten.
Eventually leading up to well... comic events.
Another thing I wanted to point out is, Big Mamas Orb! Look! Something designed to spread black little arms wherever she pleased to trap inside whatever she wants? Hello? Are you seeing that? To me this is just a refined form of the technology. Of the goop guy was version 1.0 gone wrong, Big Mama has version 4.74, now made safe for in-home use without the fear of a world eating monster spawning in your house!
Alright now we get into comic events.
So how did the krang key help its escape?
I figured that, the only thing strong enough to break the box trap made by the 4 warriors, was to use the power of something equal in power, that being another trap made by the same warriors. Therefore unless the 4 warriors created something else, or unless the goop thing wanted to sacrifice itself to break the box, the key was the only option.
Big Leo meanwhile, was the nutcracker to access the energy lmao. You guys all remember Karai yeah? She scarified herself to hold down the shredder in the twilight realm. Equal trade. Big Leo did the same thing, but instead of the shredder it was the krang key. Big Leo held down the key in exchange for himself. However, since a third party was involved (the goop shit), the black ick thing was able to intersect the energy, and repurpose it as means to break the box and escape. Which means Big Leo was only holding down the key in its physical form, while the goop guy stole the keys mystical/energy form.
What is the deal with Sprout then?
Sprout was about to do the same thing that Big Leo did, however the process was disrupted. And the energy while being processed and transferred was lost. Think of it like someone deciding to cut your plastic straw with scissors while you are drinking out of it and the fluid just spills everywhere. Thank you Poptart.
So what ended up happening was, he scarified his finger, toe, and a small piece of his mind for the key to be broken and the energy lost. It evaporated into the air.... Does this mean theres Sprouts finger and toe just?? floating around the Twilight Realm? yeah lmao probably.
How did Big Leo know about the goop thing to begin with?
I would like to imagine that during Big Leos timeline/krang apox, the box made a great place of refuge for people on the other side of the world. I cant recall where but I know it was stated that there are multiple hidden cities around the world, and by that time I would figure that even humans would need hiding from the krang. I also assume that there may be some form of communication between all refugees and hideouts around the world.
So, when word gets out to the goop guy that "hey, lmao, the key which is the one thing that can free you is over in nyc-" the goop guy would do all it can to send out a message over there that, Hey, if you can bring the key over, I can help get rid of the krang for good, there is definitely no catches :)
Big Leo eventually heard this message and proposition, he just needed to get the key. But well, looks like they could not get the key back from the krang in that timeline, look what happened.
Anyways, Big Leo keeps this offer in his head when he goes to Sprouts timeline. So when the foot keep coming back for Sprouts family to try and get the key that cant be destroyed, he ends up taking the offer.
Fire hurts it? How did that work here, but not save Sprouts timeline?
Fire worked as a temporary solution in Sprouts timeline! But since it was so spread out everywhere, the fire would not spread far, the goop entity could separate the fire from the rest of itself. It worked as a temporary thing but would never kill it entirely. Sprout and the rest of the timeline could never find and catch the core, it was always on the move, and could be anywhere in the world.
Fire worked in the box in Poptarts timeline however because the goop along with its core was contained within a small area. The core had nowhere to go to escape the fire, thus burning it. After it was burnt the Core was taken to Big Mama, who can possibly refine the technology or find another way to contain it, in case it activates again
Hey Ell what the hell is going on?
read da comic :D or re-read it, but if you did all that you are free to send an ask since I may have missed something or made something confusing!
Hey Ell, where is Big Leo?
Twilight Realm, like Karai! :D
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Hi sorry but people on twitter are saying you’re a nazi and I was just wondering if that was true??
Not only is this quite outrageous take on someone without like 0 actual proof. I can admit in the "proof"(the zionism thing which people mean as Nazism) people used against me was me at most being insensitive/ignorant which i already sincerely apologized for because i wasn't edjucated on the matter whatsoever. It was not right of me and I never repeated that after i found out about the truth of things.
But also this is ridiculous. I'm not american, I'm from a country that has been wartorn by nazis and communists. All my life I was taught about atrocities these two sides did to central europe and other countries. If you had a swastika tattooed on you here you would get literally arrested or killed on the street. But that isn't even an argument, that's just me stating how stupid and hypocritical it would be of anyone to support such things from the area i was raised in. I'm highly anti nazi, anti facist or anti anything that is even similar to that. I stand with civilians and innocent people that are being collateral damage to war and governments. Therefore I'm not a trump supporter, i was always left leaning i was always for rights. Hell I'm a bisexual woman, how could i ever support someone like Trump in my right mind?
I do not understand where this claim is absolutely coming from and i dont understand how people disregard the severity of saying this online with confidence. This is such a serious accusation that can ruin reputations unrightfully and just shows how people have no interest searching for more proof or anything before saying serious things because all they care about is drama and that the finger is not pointed at them in that moment. We as society got too comfortable about canceling and just saying anything, growing into complete parasocial relationship within each other. You are either no person to them, no human being or you are a glorified idea. Everyone is a person behind that screen and if they ever got over they pride and looked themselves in the core they would understand they also do mistakes and not everything is black and white.
I'm hurt by these accusations. This isn't anywhere close to calling someone names or weird for having odd preferences and stuff in fandoms. This is claiming that I support actual genocide, suffering of real people which is fucking awful. It makes me sad, deeply hurt. I'm not saying im better than anyone else, i dont need to be, I want this genocide to end same as anyone else would. I reflected, I took criticizm to heart and I'm now trying to truly do something with my following, i retweet donation links and donate to the charities with spare money i have.
The truth is, no matter what I say, it will never be enough for the people that just want to have moral highground, they act like they never made a mistake, like they were never ignorant in their life. I wonder how they would like it if someone took something terrible out of context and endlessly kept posting it on social media just to feel better without you having a proper chance to redeem yourself, always being seen as a "nazi" in some people's eyes because someone lied about you. It's sad and I'm sorry you keep seeing this lie about me. I think about it every day. And with this message I wanted to let you know what I truly feel and think. If you believe it is on you, but I'm finally putting my thoughts out there after months of thinking.
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I always feel pretty dumpy after getting dumped. Tonight was no different. I decided to walk the grounds one last time, and the tranquil beauty of the gardens seemed extra mean somehow. Like I was walking through something beautiful that I never even got a chance to miss. No chance to enjoy. Just rejection. Again. And the same message, though at least this time they tried to be kind about it.
Please never practice magic like that again. Bards were mages until you were too good at singing. Then things got suspicious to the headmasters. Song could be such a powerful tool and manipulate people across the field the way that death could. Put death and song together and humans always got so uncomfortable. And when it came to humans, nothing was more unlucky than a sweet death. They say the way they want to die is old and in bed surrounded by their families but...it's never true. Every single one of them secretly yearns for some kind of glory in their hearts, and it just rots and rots and rots as they age. I'd know. I'm human too. But I'm also banshee and people can just feel it. Especially those who are academically inclined. In some cultures they saw us as prophets... until they learned that the angels sing in our ears and fall out of our throats. Also people only like the idea of prophets. Tell them enough future truth and they start looking for the matches and rope. Or a crucifix.
Bewitchment. Enchantment. Manipulation. No one wants to invite a banshee to the table where everyone is sweet and happy and alive with rosy cheeks and laughing eyes.
I'm an omen. It's kind of lonely. But I get it. I suppose if I were someone else I'd feel the same.
I found myself in a gazebo near the tallest of the little sculpted waterfalls in this garden. I liked the way the water sang and flowed as it poured itself over the rocks. It was summer, so there were fireflies, and I could get back to being lost in my thoughts a bit as I watched the way they all twinkled around each other. My son used to say they were all teleporting. I laughed at him, kissed the top of his head, and earmarked that for later because that might be something he ends up being keen at. My daughter used to say she had the power of the forest when she was very young, and gods if she couldn't tell you exactly what creatures were thinking when they wanted something. The more specific the better with my daughter.
I shifted, crossing my legs over each other and anchoring my elbows on the wooden railing and letting my chin fall heavily into my palms. I closed my eyes and breathed slowly, trying to catch and understand the direction and pattern to the way the wind blew tonight. The air smelled like roses and jasmine and I looked up to see the little white flowers hanging from their vines right above me. There were lanterns of golden light and everything felt smoky and indigo. A moonlit darkness that was so easy to see around but too misty to see through.
Was it the song, I wondered? I replayed the interview in my mind. I've been learning how to perform on a stage and have gotten to this point where I fall fully into the music. I don't let my mind control the song anymore, but trust my heart to attune and express it authentically. Sometimes my heart sounds drunk or bitter. Sometimes it sounds like delight and perfection. Today... I couldn't remember. I'd found that I could trick people into thinking maybe I was some sort of reformed cleric turned bard if I sang religious songs. Today I considered a shanty because those work too. But in the end I settled on a lullaby and at first everyone looked peaceful and happy but then that look came into their eyes when they realized where they were and what was going on.
Someone told me once that it was frightening to find yourself suddenly disarmed, especially if being vulnerable wasn't something you were used to being with people. I saw that happen in real time today, and suddenly understood what he meant.
Yay, more awareness.
That brought a bit of temper to my system so I stood up and walked over to the stream to sit down. The grass was wet but I didn't care. I took off my shoes and put them into the water that ran clear and cold over a stone bottom. It was deep enough to cover my ankles. I put my palms to the earth behind me, took a deep breath, and let my head fall back as I sighed it out.
I was so fucking disappointed.
But, I'd still done it. I took the chance. I learned something. All of it sucked. I'd maybe built a few sandcastles in my mind about how my life would fit into the routine that school would have brought me. I let myself sit and grieve what was never mine but still felt lost to me. I imagined the tide of this rejection crushing all the sandcastles in one giant wave. I felt my emotions rise out of my heart, making my throat sore, took another deep breath, and sighed as I let the tears release the sadness and flow down my cheeks like the current at my feet.
Fuck, I really really wanted something else to happen. I wanted the outcome I wanted. And I didn't want any other outcome. I didn't want to go to another school. I didn't want to look at other schools. I didn't want to be a bard if I couldn't go to this school. I didn't want anything.
My body shook with a little sob as my shoulders slumped back.
I didn't want anything ever again and-
Suddenly I was laughing, and I just collapsed. I laughed and cried at the same time and rolled around in the grass. If I was going to be a fucking child like this about this I was going to commit and be a child. My heart was broken a little bit and the grass was so wet and awful but it smelled so good. I closed my eyes and cursed as I realized my hair was going to be wet now that I did this and...
There was a cough and a "Ma'am?"
I froze like a rabbit. Then I closed my eyes tighter just in case this was a dream and I could escape the inevitable embarrassment of someone from the school that rejected me seeing me rolling around in the grass like an animal. The moments clicked by awkwardly and I didn't cut to the next scene, so I opened my eyes to face the music.
Security guard. Handsome. I always liked a man in uniform. Flirting was not going to help me escape embarrassment but it could make this story more interesting. As though he were reading my mind, his face darkened with an expression that read plainly don't even try it. Great, a challenge. The only thing I can't resist. His arms crossed as we both seemed to take in each other's character in this particular moment. He scowled deeper.
I sat up like a naughty child and patted at my hair, then shook it out like a dog would. He was watching closely. My head tilted to the side and I beamed angelically. "Sorry, you caught me making grass angels," I chirped merrily.
In order to be admitted to a magic school potential students only need to provide irrefutable proof that they are mages, yet, despite your very obvious abilities, you were rejected with a comment asking you to "please never practice magic again".
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OH GOD WAIT COULD YOU ALSO ELABORATE ON PTM! VIL PLEASE? I am down bad (If you feel like) (also hi I’ve never talked to you before but huge fan)
(hiiiiii you can always come and say hi to me i like to yap hehehe)
I'm afraid I don't have many thoughts on PTM!Vil…which is why he was dropped almost immediately for the story. Vil strikes me as very straightforward, and I can't see him pining away and doubting himself. The insecurities he does have are very specific to his experiences growing up and being compared to Neige, so to me, they wouldn't apply in a scenario like PTM.
I also have the same issue that I had with Leona, in that I couldn't really pre-establish Vil's journey to falling in love with the reader like I am with Jade.
I think if I were to write a Vil in a story like PTM, it would probably start off as a rival or enemies to lovers story. For this, I think I would have you come into TWST with telepathy already, instead of it being gained when you got magic.
The story would follow with you hearing Vil's thoughts basically shit talking you and your appearance, how it's obvious you don't take self-care seriously, how you can't even wrangle a pathetic magic cat, and why are you even here? In turn, you use your telepathy to clock in on insults that would piss off Vil so you can put him in his place. This starts a lovely rivalry where Vil and you hate each other's guts and give each other shit for admittedly stupid things, like you with your oversized clothes (that you found in Ramshackle cause Crowley sure as hell didn't give you any) and Vil with his constant priming and checking his makeup. He's not trying to be vain, he's just built up a reputation, and he can't fathom someone being able to view him as anything other than perfectly beautiful after years of doubt and being second best.
Eventually it would be a slow burn, but you two start understanding each other. You even admit to yourself that you might even find him attractive, and not just physically, either. He's confident, talented, and does care for others in his own way, it just comes off as strict. But being gorgeous as well doesn't hurt.
His thoughts are ones of admiration. Admiration for how you always make the best of your situation, how resilient you are, how kind you are at the end of the day to people who've wronged you. Rook is right in that there's beauty in everything, something Vil would adamantly disagree with, but now he's finding himself finding the beauty in every mundane thing you do.
It's only one day that you two are playfully bickering, maybe he's putting makeup on you as you complain about having to keep still, that he gets another type of thought. The lipstick he'd applied (matching his of course) gets smeared at the corner of your lips. He huffs, scolding you for messing up as work, as he reaches for a wipe.
It's then that an image of you, clearly on top of him, drool from your lips and tears from your eyes streaking your makeup as you move against him, that a whole other thought crosses his mind: I want to be the only one to mess up your pretty little face.
Poor thing, he's now wondering why you've suddenly fallen backwards from your chair to the ground, face flushed despite not putting any blush on you yet.
#mochi asks#twst#twisted wonderland#vil shoenheit#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#vil shoenheit x reader#ptm#suggestive#i do think that the moment vil is aware of his feelings for someone he will confess immediately#he sees no sense in pining when he could have what he wants right then and now
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starlight moonlight sunlight — blurb nine
Title: Old Friends
Pairing: ex!Remus x reader, Remus x Sirius, eventual poly!Wolfstar x reader
Warnings: catching a partner cheating, angst, hurt no comfort, friendship breakup
blurb series navigation here | previous blurb here
“I’m heading out,” you said to your boss.
The old man gave you a wave before you stepped into the fireplace and grabbed some Floo Powder, yelling out for Hogsmeade. You still weren’t getting a paycheck, the store was failing miserably. But your boss, on account of you and only one other person being employed there, promised a percentage of every book sold. So far only three books had been sold but he did make good on his promise.
You rolled your eyes as you stepped into the Great Hall for dinner. The cowering from other students was starting to piss you off. You were a nymph not a fucking dementor. Vines slowly crept around all the tables, including the teachers’ table, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care enough. Just as you sat down, others moved away. You just shrugged. It’s exactly how it used to be at Ilvermorny. For months, everyone was afraid before becoming friendly. Sometimes overly friendly. But that was also when you were eleven. You expected this from first years, not your fellow seventh years who were very much adults and clearly knew better.
Remus winced as he watched the other students move closer to them. He and Sirius felt miserable and everyone could see it. He kept looking over where you sat alone.
“I didn’t mean to hurt her.”
“We know, Rem.”
“I should have just broken up with her.”
Lily shook her head. “We all should have told her the truth. All of us messed up.”
They watched you get up after finishing your soup. It wasn’t right but the marauders did check the map every now and then. They knew you were in the Room of Requirement although they weren’t sure what you were doing in there exactly. You didn’t come back till late into the night, annoyed to see the marauders were still with your roommates. They were all sitting on the floor with parchments in their hands. You said nothing as you went into the bathroom for a quick shower, still not speaking as you climbed into bed.
You turned your head when someone called for you. Marlene picked at her top lip for a moment.
“So for the room assignments next year since we still have to be on campus for uni, we were considering the two suites across from each other for the girls. Maybe you’d li—”
“I already applied for an individual studio,” you cut her off. “McGonagall granted it because of certain circumstances.”
“Oh.”
Everyone looked at each other. Meeting Remus and Sirius’ eyes, you could feel yourself starting to tear up again. You turned up the radio and then fell back onto the mattress, turning into a pile of daisy petals. The marauders and friends tried to finish up housing placements as quickly as possible to give you some space. You didn’t talk to your roommates all night. Come the morning, you still didn’t. It was pretty to avoid them and everyone else really for a few weeks. Your after classes job really aided in that plan. Yesterday night you even offered to take the late shift, meaning you didn’t get back to the dorms until well after the other girls were asleep. The only downside was you showed up to breakfast a bit later than everyone else.
You were barely cognizant for the announcements, more falling asleep into your porridge rather than eating it. McGonagall droned on about things you didn’t care about.
“We have three new students.”
You, along with everyone else, turned your head to the Great Hall doors. You wondered if they were going to be refugees like you or simply some transfer students. Filch began to pull open the doors.
“GUYS!” You ran to three people coming through the doors.
“Y/N!”
Jace lifted you into the air, spinning you around before setting you down in front of Max, Matilda and Pamola. Max did the same thing as him.
“You’re here? But wh— how?”
“My family,” Jace admitted. “We asked to leave before they were found. These three tagged along.”
Tilda rolled her eyes. “Well, I can’t let my new boyfriend flee the country without me.”
“I wasn’t letting my sister go alone.”
“And I tagged along cause I figured better safe than sorry for my mom,” Pamola said.
“Boyfriend?! Wait, I’m so happy for y’all.”
“Miss Y/N. If you would be so kind as to let your friends get sorted first. They can catch up in a moment.”
“Sorry, Professor McGonagall.”
You sat back down at Gryffindor table, closer to your former friends. Both of your knees bounced up and down as you waited. The loudest cheers probably came from you, shocking the marauders. Even when you were in the band, you were never this lively. Despite the fact that only Max made it into Gryffindor, all of them sat down at the table. It was like no one else existed for a moment. For once, no cacti or vines greeted students. The occasional rose did spring up on a table but nothing more.
“I can’t believe you’re here, too. How long?” Pamola asked.
“Start of the school year.”
“Wow.”
You stabbed at your porridge. “I’m so bummed. We already did house assignments for college and I opted for a studio. I take it y’all will be with each other.”
“Hey, year after, all five of us together.”
“You bet.”
“So, how’s life here?” Jace scarfed down some bacon. “What the fuck do you do around here for fun?”
“Hogsmeade and Diagon Alley.”
“No clue what that is.”
“I’ll show you,” you said with a chuckle.
Matilda nodded her head as she let her eyes wander to the marauders. She tilted her head before her eyes went wide at the recognition of all the pictures you used to show them. “So this is the famous Remus?”
“No.” You threw down your napkin. “Let’s just go.”
Successfully, you stayed with your American friends the entire day. Pamola even offered to let you stay in the Hufflepuff dorm with her, an offer you were considering taking. You showed Max how to get into the Gryffindor common room, giving him a hug before you both went to the separate girls and boys dorm.
Max groaned as he opened the door. “I’m being tested today. Hi, I’m Max. Y/N’s best friend. Hate you all, dickheads. Especially you, tall one. And slightly less but still especially you, long haired one. And just fuck you two. Glad we established this relationship. Do me a favor, don’t talk to me.”
He plopped down on his new bed, opening the carrier his cat was still chilling in. Unlike you, Jace, and Pamola, Max and Tilda had all of their things. It actually helped the group move. No one was looking at them with two purebloods amongst them. With a flick of his wand, all the trunks began unpacking for him. He pulled his cat — Cromwell — closer to his chest, scratching behind his ears. He looked over with a wicked side eye as his name was called.
“I thought I said don’t talk to me.” He looked over anyway.
“Is she okay?” Sirius asked.
“And why do you care?”
“We didn’t mean to hurt her.”
Max sneered. “Does that line work a lot for you?”
“N-no, we ju—”
“Look, if you’re really sorry then you’d leave her alone. You’ve already caused enough heartbreak, okay. If she wants to speak to you, Merlin I wouldn’t know why but she’s nicer than I’ve ever been, then she’ll find you.”
All four of them nodded at his words. Remus kept looking over, wanting to ask more but taking Max’s words to heart. Silently, he and Sirius cuddled up and fell asleep.
| next blurb coming soon |
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Where Wolves Wander (2/2)
- Summary: You and Jon were always close, but as the years went by and those feelings grew, your mother decided to put an end to it.
- Paring: stark!reader/Jon Snow
-Rating: Mature 16+
- Previous part: 1/2
- Tag(s): @sachaa-ff @alyssa-dayne @oxymakestheworldgoround
The chill of Castle Black bit through the thick layers of black wool and leather as Jon and Sam sat by a small fire, their breath frosting in the cold air despite the flickering warmth. The other recruits had long since turned in for the night, leaving the two friends alone under the watchful gaze of the Wall. A quiet, easy camaraderie had grown between them, one that had become a rare comfort in the harsh environment of the Night’s Watch.
Sam looked over at Jon, curiosity sparking in his eyes. “What was it like… you know, before all this?” he asked, gesturing around to the cold, stony expanse of Castle Black. “Living in Winterfell, with your family?”
Jon glanced at Sam, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as he poked at the fire. “Winterfell… It was different from here,” he began softly. “Warmer, in a way. Even with all the cold stone, it felt… alive. My brothers, sisters… they made it feel like home.”
Sam nodded, leaning forward, clearly fascinated. “You talk about it like it was something out of a story,” he murmured. “It sounds… wonderful.”
Jon let out a quiet chuckle. “It had its moments. Robb, Sansa, Arya… they were all different, each of them with their own ways of making life interesting. And then there was…” He trailed off, hesitating.
Sam’s gaze sharpened, noticing the sudden softness in Jon’s voice. “And then there was…?”
Jon looked away, a brief smile crossing his face before he spoke again. “Y/N,” he said quietly, his voice tinged with something warmer than nostalgia. “Robb’s twin. My… sister.”
Sam’s interest piqued immediately, and he leaned in, hanging on every word. “I didn’t know Robb had a twin. What was she like?”
Jon took a slow breath, letting his thoughts drift back to Winterfell. “She… she’s everything the North is. Strong, fierce, stubborn, but kind and loyal too. She’s one of the few who could see past what I am, you know? She never treated me like… a reminder of my birth.”
Sam’s brows furrowed. “What you are? But you’re a Stark, aren’t you? I mean… you were raised with them.”
Jon’s mouth pressed into a tight line. “Raised with them, yes, but I was always reminded that I wasn’t… truly one of them. I don’t carry the Stark name, nor the claim to anything but what I was given.” He paused, his gaze softening. “But Y/N never saw me like that. She just saw… me.”
Sam’s eyes gleamed with empathy, his expression thoughtful. “That must have been… wonderful,” he said quietly. “Having someone who saw you for who you really are, rather than what people think you are.”
Jon nodded, a hint of a bittersweet smile on his face. “Aye, it was.” He glanced down, poking at the fire again, but Sam’s curiosity hadn’t been fully sated.
“Did she know… that you were planning to join the Night’s Watch?” Sam asked hesitantly, clearly worried he might be treading into sensitive territory.
Jon let out a breath, his gaze distant. “She found out, yes. Before I left. We had a moment to talk, just the two of us. She… tried to convince me to stay.” He paused, his voice growing quieter. “I think… part of her understood why I had to go, but… I know it hurt her.”
Sam was silent for a moment, taking in Jon’s words. He looked at Jon with a kind, understanding gaze. “And did it hurt you, too? Leaving her?”
Jon didn’t answer right away, his jaw tightening. The memories flooded back, memories of quiet talks in the Godswood, her laughter filling the air, the way her hand had lingered on his arm that last day as if holding on to him just a little longer. “More than I thought it would,” he admitted, voice barely more than a whisper. “More than anything.”
Sam offered a sympathetic nod, his eyes filled with a sadness that only a friend could share. “It’s hard, isn’t it?” he murmured. “Leaving behind the people who make you feel like you… belong. And now, here we are… in a place that feels like it could swallow us whole.”
Jon met Sam’s gaze, a small, sad smile on his lips. “Aye. But I suppose that’s why we’re here together.” He glanced back at the fire, the warmth a stark contrast to the cold emptiness he felt when he thought of Winterfell, and of you.
Sam, sensing the weight of Jon’s silence, ventured softly, “Maybe, one day… you’ll see her again.”
Jon’s smile faded, his eyes reflecting a mixture of hope and resignation. “Maybe,” he replied, though his voice held a sadness that told Sam he didn’t quite believe it. But in the quiet company of his friend, the ache of your absence was a little easier to bear, and for now, that was enough.
The air beyond the Wall was colder than anything Jon had ever felt in Winterfell—a harsh, biting chill that seeped through the layers of fur and leather, numbing skin and bone alike. He trudged through the snow alongside his brothers in black, each breath clouding the air with mist, every crunch of their boots echoing eerily in the silent wilderness. Jeor Mormont led them, his broad back a dark silhouette against the endless white. Jon kept a steady pace, his eyes scanning the treeline, ever vigilant, knowing the danger that lurked in the unknown beyond.
Sam walked beside him, his teeth chattering as he pulled his cloak tighter around his body. “W-w-why did it have to be so c-c-cold?” he muttered, his voice barely audible over the crunch of snow beneath their feet.
Eddison Tollett, known as Dolorous Edd for good reason, let out a grim chuckle. “Ah, cheer up, Sam. It could be worse.”
“How could it possibly be worse?” Sam asked, his expression a mix of incredulity and misery.
“We could be dead,” Edd replied with a deadpan expression. “Then we wouldn’t feel the cold at all.”
Grenn snorted from behind them, shaking his head. “Leave it to Edd to find the bright side of freezing to death.”
Their banter was interrupted by a sudden rustling from the forest ahead, a swift, urgent sound that made Jon’s heart leap into his throat. A shape emerged from the snow-dusted trees—white, sleek, and silent. Ghost.
“Ghost,” Jon breathed, his voice tinged with relief and confusion. “What are you doing here, boy?”
Ghost bounded forward, his red eyes sharp and alert, his movements graceful and purposeful. But it was what followed that made Jon’s blood run cold—a second wolf, darker in color, moving with a quiet ferocity. Shadow.
The familiar amber eyes of your direwolf locked with Jon’s, and his heart twisted painfully in his chest. Shadow’s presence here, beyond the Wall, meant one thing: you were nearby, or something had gone horribly wrong.
“What the bloody hell?” Grenn murmured, stepping back in surprise as the black wolf padded closer, its coat blending into the shadowed treeline. “Is that…?”
“Aye,” Jon said, his voice strained, his gaze fixed on Shadow. “That’s Y/N’s wolf.”
The others looked at Jon with a mix of confusion and concern, their breath puffing out in short, quick clouds. Pypar, who had been silently observing, finally spoke up. “What’s her wolf doing here, Jon? I thought she was back at Winterfell.”
“So did I,” Jon muttered, his mind racing with possibilities, each one worse than the last. He knelt down, extending a hand toward Shadow, who hesitated for a moment before stepping forward, sniffing his hand cautiously. The wolf's fur was cold and wet, matted with bits of snow, as if it had traveled a great distance.
Sam looked at Jon, his face pale. “Do you think… do you think something’s happened to her?” he asked in a hushed voice, clearly terrified of the answer.
“I don’t know,” Jon replied, his voice barely above a whisper. “But it can’t be good. She wouldn’t have sent Shadow all the way out here without a reason.”
“Gods,” Edd muttered, his usual dark humor absent for once. “If she’s come all the way past the Wall… what could have driven her out here?”
“Quiet,” Jeor Mormont’s voice cut through the murmurs like a blade. He approached, his gaze sharp as he surveyed the wolves, then looked at Jon, his expression unreadable. “That’s your sister’s direwolf, isn’t it?”
“Yes, Lord Commander,” Jon confirmed, standing up to face him. “Her name is Shadow. I don’t know why she’s here.”
Mormont’s eyes narrowed, his gaze shifting between Ghost and Shadow. “A lone wolf crossing the Wall? It’s a strange thing. Wolves don’t stray this far north without reason.”
“What do we do, Lord Commander?” Grenn asked, looking uneasily at the dark trees surrounding them.
“We keep moving,” Mormont said gruffly. “Whatever brought that wolf here, we’re not turning back. But keep your eyes open. If there’s a message in this, I’d wager we’ll find out soon enough.”
Jon nodded, but his mind raced with questions. Was it possible that you were out here somewhere, wandering the same frozen wilderness? Or had something happened back at Winterfell that sent Shadow running, searching for him? The thought twisted in his gut like a knife.
Ghost brushed against his leg, nudging him gently, and Jon rested a hand on his wolf’s head, drawing comfort from the familiar warmth. Shadow circled around him, her amber eyes flicking up to meet his, as if she were silently urging him to understand something—something important.
“What do you think it means, Jon?” Sam whispered, shivering as he glanced back at the wolves. “Why would she come here?”
“I don’t know,” Jon admitted, his voice rough with worry. “But if Shadow’s here, then Y/N could be closer than we think. Or…” He didn’t finish the thought, unable to voice the darker possibilities that loomed in his mind.
The silence stretched between them as they continued their march, the wolves keeping close to Jon’s side, their presence a constant reminder of the uncertainty that lay ahead. Every step felt heavier, the weight of unspoken fears pressing down on him like the unrelenting cold.
As the night deepened, the world seemed to close in, the darkness swallowing the edges of the wilderness. Jon’s thoughts drifted back to you, to your last conversation in the Godswood, the way your hand had lingered on his, your eyes filled with unshed tears. He couldn’t shake the image of your face, the way you had looked at him as if he were the only thing that mattered.
“What if she’s out here, Jon?” Sam asked softly, his voice trembling with worry. “What if she came looking for you?”
Jon’s heart clenched at the thought, a mixture of hope and fear churning in his gut. “Then I’ll find her,” he said, his voice hardening with resolve. “No matter what it takes.”
The wolves padded silently beside him, their breath fogging the air, and in the darkness, Jon felt the flicker of something stronger than fear—a connection, a bond that reached across miles of frozen land. Whatever brought Shadow here, he knew it wasn’t a coincidence. And somehow, deep down, he felt that you were closer than he dared to hope.
“We’ll see what tomorrow brings,” Mormont muttered, breaking the silence as he led the group onward. “Keep your eyes open, lads. This land doesn’t give second chances.”
Jon nodded, tightening his grip on the hilt of his sword as they pressed on into the night, the wolves shadowing their every step like sentinels. The cold crept deeper into his bones, but for the first time since he’d left Winterfell, Jon felt a flicker of warmth—a spark of hope, fragile and fierce, guiding him through the darkness.
The cold bite of dawn broke through the dense trees as the Night’s Watch continued their march, the silence of the wilderness giving way to the faintest hints of movement and hushed voices. Jon’s senses sharpened as he caught sight of thin trails of smoke rising just beyond a ridge. He stopped, raising a hand, signaling the others.
“Wildlings,” Jeor Mormont murmured, his eyes narrowing. He motioned for the men to take cover along the rocks and trees, gesturing for silence. The brothers of the Night’s Watch huddled low, moving with practiced caution, their breaths quiet and controlled.
Jon crouched beside Sam, who looked stiff but determined, his gaze focused on the direction of the smoke. Ghost and Shadow were by Jon’s side, their eyes locked ahead, their bodies taut and ready. The camp came into view as they crept closer—a scattering of rough tents made of hide and fur, with Wildlings huddled around fires, muttering in low voices.
And then Jon’s heart stopped.
At the edge of the camp, tied to a wooden post, slumped a figure with a familiar face, your face, pale and drawn, your wrists bound and bloodied. You looked worn, your hair tangled, your clothes torn and dirt-streaked. Shadow, sensing you, gave a low growl, her amber eyes narrowing as she bared her teeth, but Jon quickly reached out, calming her with a gentle touch.
“Y/N,” he whispered, barely able to breathe as he took in the sight of you, alive but clearly worse for wear. Every muscle in his body tensed, his grip tightening on the hilt of his sword.
“Is that…?” Sam’s voice was a hushed whisper, his eyes wide as he looked from you to Jon, realization dawning in his gaze.
Jon nodded, his jaw clenched. “It’s her,” he said quietly, his voice hard with barely restrained fury. “We have to get her out of there.”
Jeor Mormont moved up beside Jon, observing the scene with a calculating gaze. “We don’t have the numbers for a direct assault,” he murmured. “But if we’re careful, we might be able to pull her out quietly.”
Jon’s mind raced, assessing the camp’s layout, noting the positions of the Wildlings scattered around the fires. He could see that most of them were still groggy, barely awake, their attention focused on warming their hands and preparing for the morning. He had a chance—if he could just get close enough to cut you free.
“I’ll go,” Jon said firmly, looking Mormont in the eye. “I know her. She trusts me. I can do this.”
Mormont hesitated, studying Jon for a long moment. Then he nodded, his expression hard. “Be quick and silent. We’ll cover you if anything goes wrong.”
Jon nodded in gratitude, feeling a rush of determination wash over him. He turned to Sam, who looked at him with a mixture of fear and encouragement. “Be careful, Jon,” Sam whispered.
Without another word, Jon slipped forward, Ghost and Shadow moving silently alongside him, their eyes fixed on you. He crept from shadow to shadow, his body low and silent, his heart pounding as he drew closer. Finally, he reached the edge of the camp, crouching behind a cluster of rocks a mere few feet from where you were tied.
He could see the faint rise and fall of your chest, the exhaustion in the way your head slumped forward. His heart ached at the sight of you, at the bruises that marked your skin, the blood that dried at your wrists. Swallowing hard, he moved closer, careful not to make a sound, until he was right beside you.
“Y/N,” he whispered urgently, reaching out to touch your shoulder. “It’s me.”
You flinched at the sound, your eyes fluttering open, hazy with exhaustion and pain. But as you focused on his face, a spark of recognition lit in your gaze, and relief flooded your expression. “Jon,” you breathed, your voice weak but filled with hope.
“I’m here,” he murmured, his hand gently brushing a strand of hair from your face. “I’m getting you out of here.”
A faint smile touched your lips, but worry darkened your gaze. “Jon, they… they took me by surprise. I tried to get away, but…” You shook your head, wincing. “There’s too many of them. You have to be careful.”
Jon nodded, his jaw set with determination. “We’ll get you out,” he assured you. He quickly drew his dagger, positioning himself to cut through the ropes binding your wrists. “Stay as quiet as you can.”
As he worked at the ropes, your gaze softened, and you murmured, “I knew you’d come. I knew… I’d find you out here, somehow.”
Jon’s hand stilled for a fraction of a second, his heart swelling with an indescribable warmth. “I never stopped thinking about you,” he admitted softly, his voice thick with emotion. “When I saw Shadow… I knew something had happened. I couldn’t leave you out here.”
The last rope gave way, and he helped you pull your arms free, wincing as he saw the raw skin beneath. Ghost and Shadow pressed close, nudging you gently, their presence comforting as you steadied yourself, your legs weak but your resolve strong.
“Come on,” Jon whispered, helping you to your feet, supporting your weight as you leaned against him. He cast a quick glance around the camp; the Wildlings were still occupied, but he knew their luck wouldn’t hold for long.
Suddenly, a voice called out in the Wildling tongue, and Jon’s heart lurched as a figure turned, their eyes falling on you and Jon. The alarm rose quickly, shouts echoing across the camp as Wildlings began to grab their weapons, realizing they had an intruder in their midst.
“Run!” Jon urged, tightening his grip on your hand as he pulled you forward, breaking into a sprint as Ghost and Shadow snarled, positioning themselves between you and the oncoming Wildlings.
Mormont’s voice rang out from the trees. “Move, men! Cover them!”
The Night’s Watch brothers leapt from their hiding spots, arrows flying as they formed a defensive line, pushing back the Wildlings who surged forward. Sam and Grenn each took positions beside Jon, their faces set in grim determination as they helped clear a path through the chaos.
You stumbled, nearly falling as your legs struggled to keep up, but Jon was there, his hand steady on your arm, his eyes fierce with protectiveness. “Come on, Y/N,” he urged, his voice strong, guiding you through the snowy terrain.
The wild cacophony of battle surrounded you, but all you could feel was Jon’s presence, his hand holding yours, pulling you forward, his strength keeping you upright as you escaped the chaos of the camp.
As you finally broke through the treeline, away from the Wildlings, Jon slowed, his arm still around you, his breathing heavy. He looked at you, relief flooding his face. “You’re safe now,” he said, his voice a mixture of exhaustion and profound relief.
You managed a small nod, looking up at him, gratitude and affection shining in your eyes. “Thank you, Jon. I knew… I knew you’d find me.”
He pulled you into a quick embrace, his hand resting on the back of your head, his voice a quiet murmur. “I’ll always find you, Y/N.”
The Night’s Watch brothers finally found a sheltered hollow, a quiet space where the wind wasn’t as merciless, and the snow wasn’t piled so high. Jeor Mormont called a halt, giving the men a moment to catch their breath and tend to any wounds they’d earned in the skirmish. As the others busied themselves with tending to their gear and preparing a quick meal, Jon guided you to sit down against a fallen tree trunk, wrapping his cloak around your shoulders to ward off the biting cold.
“Are you alright?” he asked, his voice laced with worry as he scanned your face, noting the shadows under your eyes and the raw marks on your wrists.
You managed a small smile, reaching up to touch his hand, savoring the warmth of his skin against yours. “I am now, Jon. Thanks to you.”
He let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding, his eyes softening. “When I saw Shadow… I feared the worst,” he murmured, his thumb tracing gentle circles over your knuckles.
You looked down at your hands, your gaze pensive. “It was foolish of me, I know,” you admitted quietly, your breath clouding the air. “But I had to find you. After you left… I couldn’t stop thinking about it, about the last time we spoke.” You looked up, meeting his gaze, a fierceness in your eyes that mirrored his own. “I knew I had to come. I couldn’t let you disappear beyond the Wall, not knowing if you were safe. Not knowing if…” You hesitated, the words catching in your throat.
Jon reached out, his fingers brushing your cheek, his touch gentle. “Y/N,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper, “I would’ve come back to you, you know. Somehow, someway.”
You closed your eyes, leaning into his hand, letting his warmth seep into your skin. “I couldn’t take that chance, Jon. I needed to know. I needed to be with you.”
A faint smile tugged at his lips, a rare expression of unguarded affection. “You always were stubborn,” he said softly, his gaze lingering on you. “But crossing the Wall, risking everything to find me… You shouldn’t have had to do that.”
“I’d do it again,” you replied, your tone resolute. “A hundred times if it meant finding you.”
A throat cleared nearby, breaking the intimate moment, and you looked up to see Sam standing a few feet away, his expression a mixture of awe and shyness as he glanced between you and Jon. He gave an awkward, apologetic smile. “I didn’t mean to interrupt… I just thought, um, I should introduce myself. I’m Samwell Tarly, Jon’s… friend.”
You smiled warmly, reaching out a hand. “It’s a pleasure, Samwell. Thank you for looking after him.”
Sam flushed, ducking his head as he took your hand. “Oh, well, Jon’s looked after me more times than I can count, actually,” he stammered. “But it’s an honor to meet you, Lady Stark.”
“Just Y/N,” you corrected gently. “Out here, I’m no different from any of you.”
Sam gave a tentative smile, looking as if he might burst with admiration. Before you could say more, Grenn and Pypar wandered over, curiosity gleaming in their eyes.
“So, this is the famous Stark sister,” Grenn said with a grin, crossing his arms as he looked you over. “Jon’s told us about you, you know.”
“Nothing but good things, I hope,” you replied with a teasing smile, glancing at Jon, who looked slightly flustered.
Pypar, grinning like a fox, nudged Jon with his elbow. “Oh, only that you’re the stubborn one, the one who won’t listen to reason.” He winked, and Jon shot him a warning look, but there was a warmth in his expression, a kind of ease he rarely allowed himself.
Edd stepped forward, his usual dour expression softened slightly. “If you’re anything like your brother, you’ll find the cold less welcoming than the fireside at Winterfell,” he remarked, giving you a nod.
You chuckled, drawing your cloak closer. “The North teaches you to endure the cold, but this…” You gestured to the frozen expanse around you. “This is something else.”
They all chuckled, the camaraderie easing the tension of the long journey and the battle. Jon watched you with a tender gaze, the sight of you surrounded by his brothers filling him with a quiet pride and warmth. It felt as if a part of home had been returned to him, a piece of himself he hadn’t realized was missing until now.
He reached for your hand again, intertwining your fingers. “So tell me,” he asked softly, his voice carrying a note of worry and curiosity, “how did you even manage to cross the Wall?”
You looked at him, a mischievous glint in your eyes. “Let’s just say I’m good at convincing people. I may have… borrowed a favor or two.” You gave a little shrug, though your eyes held a certain steel. “When you’re determined, there’s always a way.”
Jon shook his head, torn between admiration and exasperation. “You’re unbelievable,” he muttered, though his smile betrayed his feelings. “I should be furious with you for risking yourself like that.”
“Perhaps,” you replied, leaning closer, your voice barely above a whisper, “but I think you’re glad I’m here.”
He didn’t answer, but his hand tightened around yours, his gaze softening as he looked at you, every unspoken word shining in his eyes. It felt like the world had narrowed to just the two of you, a quiet warmth in the heart of the frozen wilderness.
Sam, sensing the moment, gave a small cough and turned to the others. “Maybe we should give them a moment,” he suggested, glancing back at you and Jon with an understanding smile.
The others chuckled and nodded, moving away to give you both some privacy, casting curious glances over their shoulders as they went. When they were out of earshot, Jon turned to you, his face serious.
“Why did you really come, Y/N?” he asked quietly, searching your gaze. “This wasn’t just about checking if I was alright. There’s something more.”
You looked down, your heart pounding. “Because… Jon, I couldn’t bear it. I couldn’t bear the thought of you out here, alone, with no one to care for you. I couldn’t bear to lose you to some duty that will only drive you further away. I thought… if I found you, maybe…” You paused, swallowing, gathering your courage. “Maybe you’d find a reason to come back.”
Jon’s breath hitched, his eyes darkening with emotion as he lifted a hand to your face, his thumb brushing softly over your cheek. “You’re my reason,” he murmured, his voice thick. “You always have been.”
You leaned into his touch, closing your eyes, savoring the quiet intimacy of the moment. “Then let’s find our way back,” you whispered, a hint of hope in your voice.
Jon held you close, pressing his forehead to yours, his voice barely more than a breath. “We will, Y/N. Somehow… we will.”
The small band of Night’s Watch brothers pressed onward, moving through the dense woods under Mormont’s command. Jon’s gaze kept straying forward, watching you walk a few paces ahead, deep in conversation with Mormont. Your head was tilted slightly as you listened to the Old Bear, no doubt discussing your father’s legacy. Jon could see the hint of admiration in Mormont’s expression, the way he spoke to you with a respect few outside of the Watch received.
Beside Jon, Sam shuffled closer, casting him a sidelong glance before whispering, “She’s… she’s really something, isn’t she?”
Jon’s lips twitched in a slight smile. “Aye, she is.”
Sam hesitated, a faint blush creeping onto his cheeks. “I mean, not just in the usual way. She’s… well, it’s clear you’re… close.” He fumbled over his words, a nervous look darting toward you before his gaze returned to Jon, a little too eager.
Jon’s brows knitted, sensing where Sam’s thoughts were wandering. “We’re close, yes,” he said, his tone defensive but still soft. “She’s my family.”
“Aye, family,” Sam echoed, but there was a note of amusement in his voice. “But it seems to me she’s more than that. More than a sister.”
Jon gave him a hard look, but before he could respond, Grenn, who had been listening nearby, chuckled and nudged Pypar with his elbow. “Did you hear that, Pyp? Our Jon’s got himself a lady from Winterfell.”
Pyp grinned, raising an eyebrow. “More than a sister, eh? Should we start calling her Lady Snow?”
Jon’s cheeks flushed, and he scowled at the two of them. “It’s not like that,” he muttered through gritted teeth, but the faint blush staining his cheeks betrayed him.
Edd joined the group, his usual deadpan expression laced with amusement. “She does look a bit like Robb, though, doesn’t she?” he said dryly, casting Jon a mischievous look. “Makes it a bit strange, doesn’t it? Fancying someone who could pass for your brother’s double.”
Jon’s scowl deepened, his jaw clenched tightly. “It’s not about that,” he said stiffly. “She’s… she’s her own person. You’d know that if you spent half a moment actually talking to her.”
Sam stifled a chuckle, but his eyes sparkled with a mix of mischief and genuine curiosity. “But, Jon,” he ventured cautiously, “you have to admit, it is a bit unusual. I mean… not that I’m judging,” he added hastily, “but with the resemblance…”
Jon shot him a dark look. “She’s not Robb, and it’s nothing like that. She’s… She’s different,” he insisted, his voice dropping to a murmur as his gaze drifted forward to where you were still walking, oblivious to the teasing murmurs and sidelong glances behind you.
Edd wasn’t finished, though. With his usual unshakeable deadpan tone, he gave Jon a sidelong look and smirked. “So, did you two… you know,” he asked, raising an eyebrow suggestively, “do it?”
Jon nearly stumbled over his own feet, his face reddening furiously. “Edd!” he hissed, glaring at him with wide eyes, horrified by the audacity. He shook his head vehemently. “No, we did not ‘do it.’ She’s—she’s my sister, for gods’ sakes!” he said, his voice a fierce whisper.
Edd only shrugged, unaffected by Jon’s irritation. “Sister by name, maybe, but you seem to look at her in a way that makes it clear she’s… different. No shame in it, Jon,” he added with a slight grin. “We’ve all seen it. If she’s not just a sister to you, well, that’s your business.”
Jon’s fists clenched at his sides, his patience fraying. He glanced at you, still obliviously walking ahead, engrossed in conversation with Mormont, and took a deep breath, trying to keep his voice steady. “It’s not like that. I care about her, but it’s not… I wouldn’t… disrespect her like that,” he muttered, his voice rough with frustration and something else, something he wasn’t sure he wanted to admit even to himself.
But Sam, emboldened by Edd’s remarks and the spark of mischief that rarely came to him, leaned in with an apologetic smile. “I don’t think Edd means disrespect, Jon. But… it’s plain to see. The way you look at her, it’s different. More than just kin. It’s… well, it’s the way someone looks at a person they love.”
Jon felt his throat tighten, the truth in Sam’s words cutting deeper than he wanted to admit. He had always known there was a part of him that saw you as more than family, as something unspoken, a bond he couldn’t define. But admitting it aloud, hearing it from his friends, was something else entirely.
“Look,” Jon said, his voice low and firm, glancing at each of them, “she means everything to me. She’s… part of me, and I would do anything to protect her. But whatever you think you’re seeing, it’s not what you think.”
Grenn raised his hands in surrender, smirking. “Alright, alright, no need to bite our heads off, Jon. Just sayin’. It’s hard to miss how you look at her, that’s all.”
Pyp chuckled, nudging Jon playfully. “No judgment here, Snow. If you want to write to the Old Gods and take her as your lady, we’ll all be here to toast you.”
Jon sighed, running a hand through his hair in exasperation. “You lot are impossible,” he muttered, shaking his head, though a small, reluctant smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.
Just then, you turned around, glancing over your shoulder to see the group of men huddled close, clearly discussing something with amused looks on their faces. You raised an eyebrow, a faint smile on your lips as you called back, “Are you all plotting something back there?”
Jon straightened, trying to school his expression into one of casual innocence. “Just… keeping each other warm,” he replied, his voice more gruff than he intended.
You chuckled, your gaze lingering on him for a moment, your eyes filled with the warmth he had missed more than he would ever say. “Don’t let me interrupt your brotherly bonding, then,” you said lightly, your smile softening as you turned back to Mormont.
The others waited until you were a few steps ahead before Pyp broke into a laugh, clapping Jon on the back. “Brotherly bonding, huh? If only she knew.”
Jon shot him a look, but the smile on his face lingered this time, his heart lighter than it had felt in days.
The attack had come without warning, swift and brutal. Wildlings burst out from the treeline, shrieking battle cries as they closed in on the Night’s Watch party. In the confusion, the brothers had scattered, each fighting to hold their ground amidst the chaos. Swords clashed, arrows flew, and the thick scent of blood filled the cold air.
Jon moved on instinct, his focus narrowed to one goal: keeping you safe. He had seen you knocked to the ground in the initial rush, fighting your way back up as you swung at any Wildling that dared come near. When the line broke, he grabbed your hand, pulling you along as he ducked through the melee, Ghost and Shadow flanking you both, snarling and snapping to hold back any attackers.
“Stay close!” he yelled over the clamor, tightening his grip on your hand.
The world was a blur of flashing steel, shouts, and the red of the setting sun casting an eerie glow over the snow. You clung to Jon, your breaths coming fast as you followed his lead, trusting him implicitly.
“We’re getting separated!” you cried, glancing over your shoulder to see the others scattering, pushing back against the Wildling assault. “Jon, where are we going?”
“Anywhere but here!” he shouted, guiding you toward a narrow path that sloped down into a ravine, its dark mouth hidden by the dense thicket. Ghost and Shadow moved beside you, their hackles raised, eyes fixed on the wild, shifting shadows as you stumbled into the shelter of the ravine.
Once inside, Jon glanced back, his eyes searching the treeline for any sign of the Night’s Watch or the Wildlings, but all he could see was the distant flicker of movement and hear the fading cries of battle.
“Let’s lay low here,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper as he guided you deeper into the ravine, the walls of stone narrowing around you like protective arms. The howling wind above barely touched the sheltered hollow, leaving an eerie, insulated silence.
You slid down onto a flat patch of ground, your breath coming in gasps as you leaned back against the cold stone. Jon sat beside you, his own breathing ragged, his eyes scanning the dim surroundings, ever watchful.
“Are you hurt?” he asked, his gaze finally settling on you, a glint of worry softening his usual stern expression.
You shook your head, managing a faint smile despite the exhaustion weighing you down. “I’m alright. Just… a bit shaken.”
Jon nodded, his hand resting on your shoulder in silent reassurance. Ghost and Shadow settled nearby, their keen eyes fixed on the entrance to the ravine, ears twitching at every faint sound. You could feel the warmth of Jon’s hand through your cloak, steady and grounding amidst the turmoil.
After a moment, he spoke, his voice low and filled with unspoken concern. “I thought I’d lost you back there.”
You looked at him, his face etched with worry, his dark eyes heavy with the weight of what he didn’t say aloud. “You didn’t,” you replied, reaching over to cover his hand with yours. “I’m here, Jon. And I’m not going anywhere.”
His gaze softened as he looked down at your hand resting on his. For a moment, the danger outside the ravine seemed to vanish, leaving just the two of you in this small, quiet world. “I know it’s selfish, but… I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you. Not out here, not where I can’t protect you.”
You swallowed, the sincerity in his voice tugging at something deep within you. “Jon, you’re not responsible for me,” you whispered, though part of you felt a fierce comfort in the thought that he wanted to be.
He shook his head, his fingers tightening around yours. “It’s not about responsibility. It’s… I’ve always felt it. Like you’re a part of me, and if I lost you…” His voice broke off, his gaze falling as he struggled to find the words.
You took a steadying breath, feeling the weight of his words settle over you like a blanket, warm and overwhelming. “I feel the same,” you admitted softly, your voice barely more than a whisper. “That’s why I came here, Jon. To be with you. To make sure you’re safe. Because I can’t bear the thought of you out here, alone.”
The silence hung between you, heavy with meaning, each unspoken word more powerful than anything you could say aloud. Jon’s gaze met yours, his eyes filled with an intensity that made your heart race.
Before either of you could speak again, a low growl rumbled from Ghost. Jon turned, instantly alert, his hand instinctively going to his sword as he scanned the entrance of the ravine. But nothing appeared—only the shifting shadows and the faint whistle of the wind above.
“Looks like we’ll be safe here for a while,” he murmured, his posture relaxing slightly as he looked back at you.
You nodded, pulling your cloak tighter around yourself to ward off the chill. “This place feels like a world away from everything,” you murmured, glancing around at the stone walls towering above, the narrow slice of sky visible through the crack in the rock. “It’s almost… peaceful.”
Jon smiled faintly, his hand drifting to your shoulder as he leaned closer, his voice soft. “Then maybe it’s exactly where we’re supposed to be.”
You settled against him, the warmth of his presence easing the lingering tremors in your body. For the first time since crossing the Wall, you felt a semblance of safety, cradled in the shelter of the ravine with Jon beside you, Ghost and Shadow keeping watch.
Jon’s hand found yours again, his fingers weaving through yours, and he let out a quiet sigh. “Maybe we can rest here for a while. Just… be here. With you.”
You gave his hand a gentle squeeze, your heart swelling with a warmth that defied the cold of the Northern wilderness. “I’d like that,” you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper as you leaned into him, letting yourself savor this rare moment of peace.
In the stillness of the ravine, surrounded by stone and shadows, the world outside felt like a distant memory, leaving just the two of you, together, in a place that felt like home.
As night settled over the ravine, the cold intensified, creeping through even the thickest layers of fur and leather. The two of you huddled together beneath Jon’s cloak, your bodies pressed close to share warmth, while Ghost and Shadow stood vigilant at the mouth of the narrow shelter, their eyes glowing faintly in the dim light.
Jon’s arm was wrapped around you, holding you tightly against him, his breath warming your cheek. His presence was steady, calming, grounding you in a way that made the frigid air and harsh wilderness feel like a distant threat, something beyond the safe bubble you shared with him. You felt his heartbeat, strong and steady, as he kept you close, his touch gentle but possessive.
After a long silence, he spoke, his voice barely above a whisper, tinged with a softness he reserved only for you. “I’ve missed this,” he murmured, his thumb brushing along your shoulder. “Just… having you close, feeling like we’re the only two people in the world.”
You looked up at him, catching the intensity in his gaze, and a warmth bloomed in your chest, spreading outward, filling every corner of you. “I missed it, too,” you whispered, your hand drifting up to rest on his chest, feeling the strength beneath the fabric, the warmth of him seeping into your fingertips. “Out here, it feels like nothing else matters. Like it’s just us.”
Jon’s gaze softened, his fingers tracing a line along your cheek, his touch sending a shiver down your spine. “It is just us,” he said quietly, his thumb brushing over your lips, lingering there as if memorizing the shape of your mouth. “Here, there’s no one else… no duties, no vows. Just you and me.”
His words hung in the air, heavy and full of meaning. You felt a flutter in your chest as his hand slid to the back of your neck, pulling you closer, his forehead pressing gently against yours. The warmth of his breath mingled with yours, and for a moment, the world outside faded entirely, leaving only the two of you in the intimacy of that shared space.
Slowly, his lips met yours, tentative at first, then deepening as he felt you respond, your hands sliding up to his shoulders, pulling him closer. The kiss grew more intense, a release of every unspoken word, every lingering glance, every hidden feeling that had been building between you. His fingers tangled in your hair, his other hand moving to your waist, pulling you closer until there was no space left between you.
Your breaths quickened as you melted into him, letting go of the worries, the fears, the doubts that had haunted you. Here, in his arms, everything felt right, natural, as if you had been waiting for this moment all your life.
He broke the kiss, his forehead still pressed against yours as he looked at you, his eyes dark with emotion, his voice low and rough. “I don’t want this to end,” he whispered, his fingers tracing gentle patterns on your back. “I want to stay here… with you. Forever, if I could.”
You smiled softly, your fingers brushing over his cheek, feeling the roughness of his skin, the warmth beneath it. “Forever is a very long time, Jon,” you murmured, a hint of playful affection in your tone.
He chuckled, his smile softening as he pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Then let it be as long as it wants to be. As long as I have you, I don’t care.”
The weight of his words settled over you, filling you with a warmth that chased away the last remnants of cold. You pulled him down, your lips finding his again, and this time there was no hesitation, no holding back. The night stretched on as you surrendered to the intensity of his touch, each caress a promise, each kiss a declaration.
When you finally lay together, wrapped in his arms beneath the cloak, the aftermath of your shared passion lingering like a quiet warmth, Jon held you close, his fingers tracing lazy patterns on your skin. “I mean it,” he whispered, his voice soft but firm. “I want to be with you. I want this… forever.”
You looked up at him, your heart swelling at the sincerity in his eyes, a smile playing on your lips. “Then forever it is,” you whispered, leaning up to kiss him one last time, sealing the promise as the two of you drifted into a peaceful slumber, safe and together beneath the stars.
The early morning light filtered down through the trees, casting a muted glow over the ravine as you and Jon stirred, tangled together beneath his cloak. The warmth of his body beside you, the steady rise and fall of his chest, grounded you in a way that made you wish the moment could last forever. But the world around you began to wake, a reminder that reality was waiting, and you would have to step back into it soon.
Ghost’s ears twitched, and he lifted his head, alert, his red eyes fixed on the approaching figures at the mouth of the ravine. Moments later, Mormont and the others emerged from the trees, their footsteps crunching through the snow. Mormont’s keen gaze settled on you and Jon, his expression unreadable as he took in the sight of you both huddled close, still wrapped in the cloak.
“There you are,” Mormont said, his tone brisk as he scanned the area. “We lost sight of you two during the skirmish. Thought we might have lost you.”
Jon shifted beside you, pulling away slightly, though his hand lingered on yours for just a heartbeat longer. “We took cover here, Lord Commander,” he explained, his voice steady as he rose to his feet, extending a hand to help you up. “It was… safer to wait for the attack to end.”
Mormont’s gaze flicked between you and Jon, his eyes lingering a bit longer on the closeness you’d shared, but he only nodded, his tone gruff as ever. “Good thinking. You’ve both made it through, and that’s what matters.”
Sam, Grenn, and Pypar exchanged glances, their eyes alight with curiosity, though they wisely kept their questions to themselves. Jon glanced over at you, catching your eye, and for a moment, the world seemed to narrow to just the two of you, a quiet understanding passing between you, a silent acknowledgment of the night you had shared.
As the group began to move out of the ravine, Sam fell into step beside Jon, casting him a sidelong glance, his cheeks slightly pink. He hesitated, glancing at the others to make sure they were out of earshot before he leaned in closer, his voice barely above a whisper. “So… Jon,” he ventured, his tone both hesitant and eager, “how… how was it?”
Jon stiffened, his expression tightening as he shot Sam a look. “Sam, don’t,” he muttered, glancing around to make sure no one else was listening. “It’s… it’s not something we should be talking about.”
But Sam’s curiosity wouldn’t be so easily deflected. He offered Jon an encouraging, almost conspiratorial smile. “Come on, Jon,” he said, his voice dropping to a whisper. “I’ve… I’ve never known someone who… well, who had something like that. It’s just… well, I’m curious.”
Jon sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, clearly uncomfortable. But he knew Sam meant no harm, and the eagerness in his friend’s face was difficult to resist. After a moment of hesitation, he leaned in slightly, his voice low and reluctant. “It was… more than I ever imagined, Sam,” he admitted, his gaze flicking forward to where you walked. “Being with her, it felt… like it was meant to be.”
Sam’s eyes widened, his expression a mixture of awe and excitement. “Jon, that’s… that’s wonderful,” he murmured, his tone almost reverent. “But… you know, the others… they might not understand. Mormont especially…”
Jon nodded, his expression hardening slightly as he considered the implications. “I know. Which is why I need you to keep it between us, Sam. It’s… it’s private, and it’s something that I don’t want the others to know about.”
Sam’s face grew serious, and he nodded solemnly. “Of course, Jon. I promise. I’ll keep your secret safe.”
Jon offered him a small, grateful smile, a sense of relief washing over him. “Thank you, Sam,” he said softly. “I appreciate it.”
As they walked on in silence, Jon’s gaze drifted back to you. You glanced over your shoulder, catching his eye, and a soft smile touched your lips, a silent communication that only the two of you could understand. It was a fleeting moment, but it held a world of meaning, a promise that whatever challenges lay ahead, you would face them together.
With Sam beside him and you up ahead, Jon felt a rare sense of peace settle over him, the weight of his secret shared, his heart lightened by the presence of those he held closest. For the first time since joining the Night’s Watch, he allowed himself to believe in the possibility of happiness, however fleeting it might be.
#game of thrones#a song of ice and fire#asoiaf x reader#fire and blood#asoiaf#hotd#house of the dragon#got/asoiaf#got x reader#got x you#got x y/n#got jon snow#jon snow#jon x reader#jon x you#jon x y/n#where wolves wander#house stark
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Just needed to come on here and rant
I usually try to stay away from drama and keep to my small circle of people I regularly interact with, but it makes me sad to see so many wonderful creators I know leave because people don’t know how to be nice or keep their mouths shut.
First of all, the world is shit as it is. Fandom is created to be a safe space, where people can come together over a mutual love for something. FANDOM is honoring a creation - which means getting to do what you want with what’s already been put out. The characters/game/etc were a gift to us, and we get to take that and MAKE things.
If you don’t agree with someone’s interpretation, MOVE ON or MAKE YOUR OWN. Canon is a baseline. There was a quote that went around tumblr a long time ago that said, "sometimes, fanfic is a love letter to canon, sometimes it's a polite disagreement, sometimes it's 95 things canon did wrong nailed to a door.”
I’ve said it a million times before - you don’t like it, make your own. Better to channel your anger into being creative than sending hate someone else’s way and stifling theirs.
I know it’s probably a few squeaky wheels since this fandom is quite small, and all of the creators that I’ve interacted with have been lovely, kind, wonderful people.
Second of all, I have been in fandom spaces for a VERY long time. Not to age myself, but I was actively on tumblr during the SuperWhoLock awakening (iykyk) and was big on interacting in the Supernatural fandom. There was a confession blog there as well that spiraled into bullying people for shipping certain characters or interpreting them a certain way.
I received a number of awful hate messages and even death threats because of something I spoke out on. It caused me to pull away from fandom spaces and lurk instead of interacting for…well, considering HL is the first thing that got me back out there, and after a whole year and a half of lurking, it’s been a long time. I don’t want to see my lovely people here go through the same thing I did.
Anyway. This wasn’t as articulate as I wanted to make it, and I’m not even sure where to end this. It all just needed to be said.
Please think before sending messages. The world is terrible enough - let’s keep this a safe and welcome space.
And to the hateful anons? Maybe open up your laptop and create what it is you want instead of harassing others. Or, you know. Go to therapy.
I love all my wonderful HL creators (and kind lurkers!) and I’m giving you all a big hug.
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In your Pokémon au, do the boys have to deal with instincts or anything like that? Like does the Pokémon they (represent?) have any effects on their habits or behaviors?
Yes! So, for this AU, everyone in the universe has certain habits and behaviors pertaining to the Pokémon they are. Ex: Bird Pokemon molt and preen and have the urge to migrate at a certain time of the year Ex: Scolipedes and Centiskorches have an innate rivalry with each other It’s not like their instincts completely take over their minds, but subtle things in how they act. The boys’ personalities are exactly the same just with some additional quirks. I'm basing how they act from dex entries/ in-game animations/ and other media! This is long so strap in!
Ingo
In Ingo’s case, Chandelure tends to spin A LOT. It’s a habit they all share whether to battle or emote. It’s just what they do.
Chandelure don’t get dizzy so they can do so without repercussion.
This behavior started when he evolved into a Lampent.
Ingo either spins on his toes when he’s happy or when he attacks. But his twirls are sharper and not as smooth and elegant as other Chandelure
Think of a pirouette but very stilted.
He spins on his heel pretty fast, too, and smacks Emmet every now and then.
He tends to point his toes like a ballerina while he floats.
He often sways on his feet or in the air like a pendulum if he’s idle or deep in thought.
This is kind of a bad thing because he might accidentally hypnotize a passerby by the combination of the motion and his flames.
Luckily, riding the train hides his swaying as it’s already a bumpy ride.
Although sometimes he has to snap the person out of his trance. He will profusely apologize afterward.
His flames aren't hot unless he wants them to but they feel warm
Another thing that creeps Emmet out a bit is that Ingo can see and talk to spirits. Not ghost Pokémon. Actual spirits.
Certain Pokémon have this ability and fewer are able to help these spirits. Ingo is one of them
Chandelure, in particular, act as a lure. haha
Emmet can kind of feel if a presence is there but he needs Ingo’s clarification. (it's that twin connection they share)
Unlike popular belief, Chandelure do not destroy a spirit with their flames. It may look like it but it's to help a lost soul move on.
While he is a conductor for trains, he doubles as a guide for lost spirits because he believes it's his duty. (Idea from this wonderful fic!)
Some aren't ready and he’ll respect their decision and leave them alone
What does bother him is that he can sense when someone is about to die and hates hospitals for this exact reason
It's awful because he feels it multiple times a day from passengers
He doesn't want to burden Emmet so he stays quiet
Emmet knows when Ingo's overwhelmed and will try to distract him the best he can
He's terrified to one day sense Emmet's death
Emmet
Emmet, as an Eelektross, has a bad chewing problem! I kind of showed it in this post already but he gnaws at any pen or pencil any chance he can get. If not he’ll chew on his nails.
He lets out small bursts of electricity from his teeth as he chews in thought
He has pockets full of hard candy to curb the issue though
Low on sugar? He can help!
It's also used to bribe the Joltik Quadruplets. (I'll show them later!)
He does bite Ingo if they get into an argument. It's always Ingo's tails too. But they rarely seriously fight anyway
Emmet has bit through their cutlery before...multiple times... but it's on him to replace it. (Ingo has his own set of utensils now)
He'll either thump or swish his tail when he's agitated.
He has the tendency to wrap around anything if he stays in the same place for a while. (A pole/his office chair/ furniture)
He mostly coils around people verrry tightly when he gives a hug, which is a habit he started as an Eelektrik.
You have to tell him to let go because he unconsciously constricts the air out of you.
He's stronger than he looks so please tell him because he doesn’t realize and never wants to hurt anyone.
Ingo is mostly the recipient of this but Elesa is a close second. The depot agents are third.
With any body of water, he starts to think how the water feels and has the urge to jump in. It doesn't matter if it's freshwater or seawater. He wants to dive in.
In the water, Emmet is a completely different guy. It's like a switch flips in his head. It’s freeing for him to be underwater as he can move how he wants to!
Beach trips to Undella Town or Humilau City are a frequent thing, and he will be cranky if he misses a day!
His favorite place is the Marine Tube because Ingo can be there too!
Ingo will walk through the tunnel as he watches Emmet have fun
Since Eelektross in canon are ambush hunters, Emmet subconsciously acts like one
Is the type to silently enter a room and sneak up on you
He likes to wait deep below the surface watching above him
It's like his version of cloud-watching
If there’s a shadow at the top, he has to find out what it is!
He has a habit of swimming at an alarming rate and abruptly popping out of the water to greet whoever is there. He doesn't mean to! He's just curious.
He only gives them a really bad scare and a heart attack
Ingo will join him on a floaty and act as a beacon because Emmet sometimes swims out too far.
Other marine pokemon point him in the right direction if he does get lost.
Other miscellaneous things:
It’s a common form of greeting between Electric types to shock each other. It’s their version of a handshake/hello.
Ingo’s built up a resistance to electricity thanks to Emmet, but sometimes it’s really shocking!
Emmet sometimes bumps into things because of his body.
They both can see in the dark, but Emmet can see perfectly underwater.
They both have fallen asleep levitating before.
Ingo doesn't have a house key because he can just go through the front door or wall or anything really.
Because of this, he has a habit of not opening doors
Ingo is actually wary of water because he's afraid his fire will go out but he toughs it out for Emmet because he loves him so much.
He can swim but it's still the fear of going too deep.
There is battling in this AU! Ingo and Emmet still run the Battle Subway with their team, The Top Depot Agents! (I'll show them sometime!)
Also, if you have any ideas of your own, you can make your own post and tag me! What I say isn’t set in stone cause this is an idea for everyone to enjoy. I’d love to hear any new ideas!
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Breaking down all the Buddie from "Confessions"
Did I write a photo review with over 5000 words dissecting the episode? Yeah, I did... Hope y'all enjoy!
Gonna ignore the first call because other than the bad mustache CGI/shots where it's not even there, there wasn't anything of substance. I wonder if they used that old call cause they had to fill up time, were short on budget, something else fell through or what happened.
So let's move to Eddie going to church. After 23 or so years he felt the need to confess his sins. But after an explanation of the crazy stuff that went down with Kim, including mentioning how Eddie lied to his son, his best friend and his girlfriend, he concluded he's not deserving of forgiveness and fled. The priest looked conflicted and that's supposed to be that.
Eddie, catholic guilt and all, went to church to confess. It's like the most desperate measure, I imagine, but desperate times... He gave the priest his name. Interesting. I got so emotional when he described Chris and talked about his optimism. Lying to Buck was pretty much at the top of the list, huh? Like, Eddie knew how bad he was behaving because their relationship's made up of truths. His talk in the kitchen with Buck was actually instrumental to him seeing how wrong all of it was. They need to be married immediately. The fact that one of the prayers (?) Eddie was meant to repent with was called "Our Fathers" was also interesting because it's coming from a priest or father but also, more obviously, Eddie's got a million daddy issues. Ramón traumatized him and Eddie said he traumatized Chris and Chris ended up going to Texas to live with Eddie's father.
The Buck and T date scene was super interesting for many, many reasons:
Buck thought he had the upper hand, saying he'd pay for dinner and trying to get T to guess the reason behind it.
T already knew it's their anniversary, which Buck clearly didn't expect.
T didn't just know, he actually brought Buck a gift for the occasion.
Interestingly enough, last season we learned that Buck didn't like basketball in the episode in which his jealousy and Eddie and T and him being bisexual happened.
T, after SIX months of dating the man, somehow didn't know that and gifted Buck tickets to see the Lakers.
For some odd reasons, T told Buck he didn't even have to take him to the game, "Take Eddie if you want," he suggested.
Buck looked confused but not exactly averse to that idea and asked, "really?"
And then T went, "and die" and then Buck replied, "okay, that sounds right."
Now, let's go through all that. It's their anniversary, they're out for dinner, and they apparently had a good time and then it's like they're completely out of sync. Buck wanted to pay for dinner to commemorate their anniversary, thinking T had missed it, whereas not only did T not miss it but he also bought him a present. Problem was said present wasn't something Buck actually cared for, which T seemed unaware of. The joke about taking Eddie... Why even suggest that? Was that a test? Did Buck fail it by wondering if that was really a possibility?
Then the woman interrupted the date and asked for a picture, with some unnecessary touching involved. I truly didn't get why Buck grabbed his own phone to take the pics... Was this second nature to him? A practical way to have an excuse to ask for the woman's phone number to send the pics? She wondered this and Buck denied it but there's literally no other reason to do that. T looked at the whole thing amusedly. Buck took the pics and went back to the table, expressing how weird that was.
Was that weird? I'm honestly so confused by that scene, like... people ask strangers to take their pics all the time. Yes, some of those might be an excuse to flirt but they're at a restaurant, which isn't exactly the greatest place to be trying to pick up someone. Also, Buck made it weird with the whole using his phone thing. Even if the woman was flirting, which she seemed to be, it didn't have to be made into anything. We can assume from this that Buck is uncomfortable being flirted at in front of T but he might also not feel great about feeling attracted to somebody other than his boyfriend who's right there to see it all.
Here's where it actually got weirder. T acknowledged the fact that it's okay to look and then Buck remarked that T didn't do that. T explained he's gay by saying he's a Kinsey 6. Buck, for some reasons, didn't pick on the meaning of that so T had to explain it. That's just... I call bullshit on that. Buck, recently bisexual, lover of research and internet deep dives would know ALL about it. This scene, I gotta say, felt super wonky. At points it was meant to but at others, like this one, it just... felt off. There's also the fact that Oliver and L have zero chemistry...
Anyway, back to the date. So T didn't know that Buck disliked basketball and Buck didn't know that T was gay? After SIX months of being together? What in the hell? Why were they only talking about that at this point? I don't think full disclosure or knowing your partner's history is a must at all, but considering Buck's curiosity and the fact that he was newly out, I figured all these subjects would've part of the first conversations between them. I'm not sure what to think. Was the writing completely off? Were they unable to come up with a better excuse to bring about the past partners talk and resorted to this? It's baffling. And since it's canon, whatever the reason, I found that the whole date showcased how little they actually knew about each other, which could only be a bad sign of the things to come for their relationship.
Of course, after that comment, T revealed he was engaged to a woman and called it off. Once again, the dialogue... T saying the woman went "nuts" after their break up, taking up some "himbo" half her age... Buck figured she was just trying to get over T, and then he mentioned the name of the woman. Of course it was Abby. Of course. Buck was literally having a crisis there, but the waiter showed up and asked how everything was. T, completely out of tune with what Buck was clearly trying to process, said it was "perfect." The waiter asked if he could get them anything else and T said "no, I think we're good." Buck looked so the opposite of good. Then the waiter wondered "who gets the damage" and, at last, a flawless piece of dialogue with T pointing at Buck and saying "That would be him." Buck was handed the check and the waiter told him, "whenever you're ready, no rush" and left while Buck looked like he was having a heart attack.
So, yeah, the date was a complete disaster. It's a mix between the actors not clicking, the dialogue serving the plot instead of Buck as a character (and Abby and even the show) and finally the actual plot dictating that it had to be a disaster. Honestly, the moment this bit ended, I knew they were going to be done.
Next, Buck went to dispatch to talk to Maddie. Why didn't he talk this through with Eddie, Hen and Chim? Curious... Maddie wondering how many men Abby had turned gay was hilarious. But I can't believe they didn't squeeze in the fact that Buck's bi there. They didn't do it during the date, though it was implicit, but here they had the perfect opportunity since they hadn't done it before. It would've taken a second for Buck to correct Maddie. Again, the writing this episode was all over the place, specially cause Buck looked at Maddie offended and Maddie clarified she was joking but then Buck sorta explained himself and T... anyways. Josh showed up then, and something was totally off with the actor's hair btw, I couldn't focus for a second there.
Josh eavesdropped and caught the kissing a boy part and eagerly asked if there was another boy... Buck was quick to deny that. Well, there's Eddie... Maddie and Buck explained the whole situation and Josh apparently knew her but they weren't close. And then, again, this whole thing just didn't make sense. Buck remarked that T led her on, said he loved her and then hurt her. Maddie thought Buck was afraid T would do that to Buck but Buck denied this and said, "I thought I knew him" and that he didn't think T would be capable of being dishonest and cruel.
Let me rewind for a second. Why was Buck under the impression that he knew T? Buck didn't even know T was gay... Also, didn't Buck know about T's past? He was worse than cruel to Hen and Chim... Truly, was he not told about all of that? I just, the use of the world cruel here... don't get me wrong, leading someone on is cruel but the whole being gay and repressing it part, while not excusing it, would at least explain T's actions. But the way he acted towards Chim and Hen... that had nothing to do with self-repression. It just didn't. I need someone to explain to me in detail how come Buck was deluded to think he knew T when at this point I'd be shocked to learn he knew T's last name.
Then the Josh speech happened. I wasn't happy with it at all. First of all, what's Buck loving him to do with any of it? If T was a cruel person, then Buck loving him wouldn't justify any of what he did to Abby. Buck looked super not in love as an answer, which was hilarious to me because of course he didn't love T, he didn't know the man!!! Josh backtracked from that word and asked a series of questions aimed at... gauging how much Buck cared for T? IDEK, it was all pretty ridiculous from the start. Also, first two questions made sense for Buck to answer affirmatively but T was literally such a plot device that there hadn't been a single instance in which Buck had shown that he was thinking about T or making T's concerns and happiness his own. These things, though, get positive answers in canon as far as Buddie is concerned. The future question was interesting because Buck's answer was "I could." It's never a definitive answer, it's another instance of "I guess" from the time T echoed "my attention?" when they first kissed. It's like Buck was convincing himself then. Josh took that to advice Buck to stop judging T because Buck didn't know what he was talking about.
The speech went into pre and post Glee world and all that nonsense. I truly hate a lot of things this episode chose to be. Was mentioning a Ryan Murphy show in a RM show a necessity? I don't wanna get into what Glee did or didn't do for the queer world, the point here is actually moot because T and Abby weren't a thing before Glee. Again, whatever experience with coming out T and Josh had, it had nothing to do with what Buck was asking. Buck was worried about the side of T he claimed not to know and how cruel he could be. I think the way T referred to her and the situation was also pretty awful, in the present tense. Even if one thought T was protecting himself by being with Abby, there is still room for judgement. We have Hen and Karen, in this same show, not being cruel to anyone, for one. Also, T didn't fight a single battle. He treated his coworker who was out like scum and was racist towards Chim. T wasn't an activist fighting for his life and his rights, he was just a bad person all around as far as we know. He had no scars to show. We can pretend he had an internal battle, maybe a family issue with his coming out but there's nothing to honor him for.
I cannot believe this show did that speech so awfully and pretended it was the greatest thing since Jack Shephard's "live together, die alone." Truly, they thought they had done a brilliant job and it's utter bullshit throughout.
Moving on, Eddie went to get juice... but then he changed his mind and got water instead. Who's there to witness that but Father Brian. Eddie's outside, drinking his water looking gloomy about it when Brian asked him of he could take a seat. Eddie allowed him to and for some reason, as Brian was sitting down, looked around. Brian told Eddie about being there for the first time, as if compelled, and then asked Eddie if he went there often. Eddie immediately assumed he was being hit on. Now, whether this is indicative of Eddie being hit on a lot or he just took those words as the line they sometimes can be and interpreted it that way, I hope we'll find out soon. Either way, Eddie told Brian "no offense, I'm straight." The lady doth protest... Hilariously enough, Brian's answer wasn't "me too" or "I'm not interested" but "I'm celibate". Eddie took that in and then Brian introduced himself and revealed that he knew Eddie. Eddie was processing that and the Father part, his hand still in the air.
Brian mentioned that he noticed that Eddie chose the juice initially and then got the water instead. He asked Eddie why he did that and Eddie kinda asked "decided I wanted water?" Brian posed that Eddie was punishing himself, denying himself because Eddie didn't feel worthy. Eddie sighed and, "I don't feel worty of juice?" Brian went straight (haha) to the point, "Of joy." Eddie chuckled and looked around and spoke in a low voice as he said he didn't have a lot to be joyful about because Brian was bringing up something Eddie had confessed to him in public. Eddie's well aware he's in public... Brian started listing the things that Eddie had, Chris, his parents, his job and his mustache. Eddie was kinda not happy but that last one got him laughing and blushing. He then confessed that he grew the mustache because he couldn't grow a full beard due to the LAFD. Brian concluded the mustache was a disguise and Eddie said it was something like that. Brian asked what Eddie's afraid of seeing in the mirror and Eddie said, "A failure. A man who doesn't deserve forgiveness. Or joy." Brian said that's now what go wanted for Eddie, that he'd already forgiven him. Eddie repeated that he doesn't deserve that and uncapped the bottle to take a sip of the water. Brian told him to earn it, and to stop punishing himself in the meantime. He remarked that Eddie spent his life in service and he understood that but they couldn't take care of others if they didn't take care of themselves. Eddie smiled and said he understood and Brian told him that after praying, he wanted Eddie to do something frivolous, something fun, something that expressed pure joy. Eddie told him he'd think about it.
The Eddie scenes were clearly written by someone else because they were all pretty on point. We had Eddie conflicted, and while it could just be him preferring water (the alternative is truly devastating to me so I want to believe Eddie isn't punishing himself through food), Brian decided to go with it to get Eddie to reflect about what he was doing to himself and it worked. Eddie didn't run away like he did in church but Eddie was shown to be aware of his surroundings, so the fact that he claimed to be straight with all of his chest... Why did he do that? Why did he think he was being hit on in the first place? Why was that moment necessary within this scene? Was juice really a representation of joy? Was joy a metaphor for something else? What were tptb trying to show or say here? Would a heterosexual character need to affirm himself as such? Would a repressed one? Thoughts, so many thoughts!!!!
The well emergency happened and it wasn't about Eddie, but it was interesting cause they seem to be doing Greatest Hits for some reason... Now I gotta ask, wouldn't Eddie, as a medic, know that getting the kid oxygen wouldn't work? Why was Hen explaining that to him? Honestly, the writing this episode... Buck's first idea was to dig... funny. Eddie said someone had to get down there and Bobby told him he wasn't gonna fit this time. Interesting. Bobby announced they would pull the big brother out after two minutes no matter what, specifically addressing Buck and Eddie. Interesting.
So it wasn't about Eddie because it wasn't the same Eddie. The pipe was smaller and Eddie didn't fit. But Eddie also didn't fit himself. He disguised himself with a mustache to avoid looking at his face in the mirror because he felt like a failure. He was shown in an episode entitled "Masks" at home taking down Halloween decorations all on his own. Bobby made sure that both Buck and Eddie knew the clock was ticking and they had to abide by it this time. Unlike Eddie's well, when Eddie cut the line and Hen refused to have Buck look for him because they'd end up with two cut lines. No more lines being cut? No more alternative ways to escape? Maybe I'm reading way too much but the camera did show Buck and Eddie's reaction as Bobby singled them out.
Back at the loft, T said he had a spot right out front and they should Uber to the movie so he didn't lose it. That phrasing... Buck agreed but asked to talk first. T replied positively, "we got time." Again, funny way to put it. They were both going to the movies so why was T the one who was going to lose it if they didn't get the Uber? You know who actually got an Uber with Buck recently, right? Also, "we got time".... famous last words. He'd just said they didn't have time but then said they did and, well, as it turned out, they didn't.
They sat down around the island and Buck brought up the story at the restaurant that T shared with him about how he "almost got engaged." This was odd and T corrected Buck, "I did get engaged. What I didn't do is get married." Buck said he appreciated T's honesty and that he wanted to be honest with him. T knew this spelled trouble and Buck denied it before taking out his phone and passing it over to show T pictures of Buck and Abby. T was surprised at first but then he scrolled to a pic of Buck and Abby kissing. Buck announced he was the himbo. T agreed it was crazy, after Buck put it like that, but added it was a little awkward. Buck decided to go closer and said it was like that for him as well at first, and that he should had been honest at dinner, but T asked or gathered that it had freaked him out a little. Buck said yes to this and T explained that if he had known, he wouldn't had used the word himbo because he didn't think Buck's one. Buck claimed that he was, at least before Abby, because what they had wasn't that, not for him. Buck said it was the most transformative relationship of his life until then. Buck said one of the reasons he's comfortable with T was that T's comfortable with himself. T said he wasn't always that way and Buck said he's aware and it made him admire T more. And then dropped the bomb, saying he wanted T to move in with him. WHAT?
No, really, WHAT? Buck really got deranged thoughts cause why on Earth would he ask T to move in? They clearly didn't know each other, they didn't love each other either, so explain how this made sense?? I'm hoping that it's a case of tptb purposefully having Buck spiral and go from zero to a hundred. There's also parallels between this and Eddie and Marisol, with Buck and Eddie asking their partners to move in when their relationships were clearly not at that stage.
T's reaction to Buck's words was crystal. While Buck said he was ready to take the next step and then, for entirely insane reasons, made it clear that he wasn't proposing marriage and or an engagement, though that'd be a possibility thanks to the brave people that came before like T. WHAT? Really, no, I'm so serious. I fucking cannot with this dialogue. Moving in, the suggestion, was bad enough, but bringing up marriage? Attributing the fact that they had that right thanks to people like T? SERIOUSLY? This was atrocious. I know Oliver was thinking of his bank account while delivering those lines because they were as non sensical as they could get.
"Why be apart when we can be together?" Buck finally asked. T said that's sweet but he couldn't move in. Buck wondered the why and T answered, "Because... I know how this ends." And my heart literally stopped or skipped a beat or something. I legit thought he was gonna bring up Eddie or a hint and, well, he kinda did, though not directly.
Buck asked what that meant and T explained. He mentioned Buck's qualities but then said that Buck's feelings were new and so it was all exciting and it felt like forever but he's still figuring himself out, which was good. Buck asked what he was saying and T said that no matter how bad he wanted to be, he wasn't his last but his first. Buck interjected that they could be the same but T said they usually weren't. If he were to move in, Buck wouldn't mean to but he'd end up breaking T's heart and he didn't think he could deal with that. He got up to leave, saying he should go and Buck told him to wait and asked him if he had just broken up with him, to which T replied, "yes, I guess I did. Believe me, I didn't see it coming either. Should've known that parking spot was too good to be true. I'll see you around, Buck."
At last, free! But while the beginning of the conversation was terrible, it ended on a high note. There's a lot of questions, like: according to what he said, T knew there wasn't a future between them. So I'm guessing here that after six months, they hadn't actually discussed that because Buck was clearly on a different page. T knew they weren't long term while Buck was thinking of moving together and being together for good. Make it make sense, how were these two dating not knowing anything about each other and not discussing basic relationship stuff??? T knew that Buck had to figure himself out yet he was still with him hoping it'd be casual without actually talking about it??? Yet he later claimed he didn't see a break up coming and he could see his heart being broken?
Now, my shipper heart wants to believe the between-the-lines reading of this scene had Eddie written all over. Eddie is how it'll end... And the fact that T's answer to Buck's question contained the "guess" this time around, mirroring Buck's response to "my attention"... INTERESTING. It was all a guessing game between BT, It's also the first time he called Buck by his name, which was the first and probably last because we're not gonna see him ever again. I was glad Buck asked if they were done because we all know he got confused about it with Abby... So long, T, you will not be missed. Buck's loft door opened and later on, another did...
Finally, we had Eddie. My boy. Looking at himself in the mirror and getting rid of his disguise.
And then... I literally felt so many things at once, y'all! The music, the shot... I couldn't believe it was about to happen. And then the mole made an appearance and Eddie was wearing pink and tighty whities and I swear I couldn't. I just, even rewatching to write this... I love him so much!!!!!!!!!! I was so happy to see Eddie letting go of his disguise and allowing himself to have that joy. The fact that Ryan looked like that... I was fighting for my life the whole time, NEGL.
I kept thinking Buck was going to show up midway. I was truly bracing myself for it. But the doorbell rang. Eddie looked through the peephole. Buck was there. Eddie opened the door, nodded at him and Buck gave him a beer as an answer to an unasked question and got in. Eddie closed the door and looked at the beer, at Buck and at the beer again. He made a face and then climbed the sofa. Buck was already drinking when the camera panned to him. Eddie opened his beer and drank from it. Scene.
LISTEN. I was unhinged already because they had Ryan dancing like that. But then the final scene happened and I just... I don't know how I'll survive what I hope it's to come.
Let's break that one down:
Eddie decided to follow Brian's words. Eddie didn't forgive himself but he decided to stop punishing and disguising himself in the meantime.
The way Eddie looked at himself in the mirror, both before and after he shaved off his mustache... My heart!!!
Eddie allowed himself to do something frivolous, something fun, something that expressed pure joy. The fact that he chose to dance half naked around his house... that's very babygirl of him, and I don't say this lightly.
The pink... the moves like the ones from the bachelor party... I felt crazy.
I kept waiting for Buck to show up, like my mind was half insane at what I was seeing and half insane at the possibility of Buck seeing it as well.
The doorbell rang instead.
Why didn't Buck use his keys?
It was the perfect opportunity for Eddie to put on some pants. Eddie didn't do that… Neither before or after looking who it was.
But, really, why didn't Buck use his keys? WHY????????
Was it to hammer the fact that Eddie was comfortable opening up his door to Buck while not wearing pants?
Was it so Eddie could see him standing on the other side of the door, mimicking Brian's view of Eddie in the confessionary? Will there be something for Buck to confess in the future? To Eddie specifically???
Buck wasn't looking at Eddie when Eddie saw him behind the door, btw...
Eddie opened his door and they looked at each other and said not a word but understood each other perfectly.
I truly hate the continuity error with the shirt collar. It's gonna hunt me forever.
Buck made himself at home while Eddie considered the beer.
Remember how Eddie's choices were water or juice? Well, what about a third secret option? BEER. Buck's beer, in fact. INTERESTING.
I went nuts and will continue to go nuts at Eddie climbing the sofa. Whose choice was that? I need to know. It was so freaking cute!!!
The camera went steady and Buck was already drinking from his bottle. Eddie, on the other hand, uncapped the bottle like he did with the water, and the shot ended as he drank the beer.
The contrast in the colors of their clothes… the fact that Eddie was looking to the side while Buck was looking ahead.
Was all of this symbolic of the fact that Buck already figured his sexuality out while Eddie's just starting? I'd like to think so.
Was it symbolic of Buck reaching conclusions he'd later have to confess to Eddie before Eddie arrives to those same conclusions himself? I'd also like this very much.
Now, the episode was called "Confessions" and Buck and Eddie didn't speak to each other. Not a single word. Even in that last scene, the only one in which they actually interacted, they didn't use words to communicate.
I see this lack of dialogue between Buck and Eddie in two ways:
First, it could show how good a relationship Buck and Eddie have in order to not utter a sound and still get each other completely. Regardless of all the issues I had with the writing, I can safely say that Buck and T were the complete opposite and lacked communication all around. The space and lack thereof reflected this too. Buck and Eddie know each other so well and Buck went directly to sit down on the couch, waiting for Eddie. Eddie followed right behind. BT, though... Buck stepped away from their table and the whole conflict with T's dating history started. Buck sat very far from T at the loft and only got close to be broken up with. Incredibly enough, that final shot with Buck and Eddie sitting together at Eddie's couch was the first that ever happened... Maybe that's foreshadowing something else, like couch theory related stuff? I never really spiraled about it before but I might soon.
Second, it could indicate there's something Buck and Eddie aren't saying to each other. They didn't speak to each other because they can't -- they're not ready or aware that there is something to confess. They remained silent because it isn't time yet but if they were to confess something, it would be impossible to take back. It would change everything. It will.
This is a legit insane post. When I say they're driving me nuts, I mean it and this is proof. Even though it's the longest ever, I probably forgot stuff that I might add tomorrow.
Now please share your thoughts on the episode and Buddie and everything so I don't feel alone in my madness. <3
#911 ABC#911#Buddie#Buck and Eddie#Eddie Diaz#Evan Buckley#Buddie Meta#911 Meta#Ryan Guzman#Oliver Stark#realchemistry#this is actually crazy#Like I literally lost it#but I needed to say something or some things and so I did and now... here it is#I truly can't believe myself but after all this writing this is getting posted#The fact that I'm thinking I might make separate posts about certain things later just to expand...#send help
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