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nereidprinc3ss · 1 year ago

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do you believe me now?

in which fem!reader is insecure around spencer until she finally asks him to take matters into his own hands (literally)

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18+ (smut) warnings/tags: inexperienced reader, fingering, softdom!spencer my sweet sweet beloved angel, sub reader, praise, you know he talks you through it, brief mention of drinking wine, i think that's it a/n: i hope u guys like this ! slightly different dynamic than my other stuff maybe but let me know what u think!! i love feedback and i love YOU!!!

“You’re so pretty.”

It’s the first thing Spencer has said since you two landed on his couch, exhausted from one of Rossi’s extravagant soirées. It was your first of many, if Spencer’s entire team is to be believed. More nights featuring Italian food and wine you could never afford don’t sound half bad—but for now you’re drained. You barely had the energy to kick off your heels and topple into Spencer’s lap five minutes ago. The silk dress still pools over his knees and your hair still falls in curls around your face. He brushes one aside as he continues.

“I mean—you always look beautiful. But I’ve never seen you all done up. You’re obscenely gorgeous.”

You groan awkwardly, burying your face in Spencer’s collar as your face heats. Taking compliments has never been your strong suit, especially from someone who you perceive to be so out of your league. The relationship you have with Spencer is relatively new, and sometimes you worry delicate; like one slip-up revealing the real you and he’ll go running. So far, though, he seems hellbent on proving you wrong.

His hand finds the bare skin of your arm, passing up and down gently. “Why don’t you believe me?”

“…I do.”

It’s unconvincing. Spencer scoffs.

“No, you don’t. You never believe me when I compliment you.”

The cadence of his voice is light enough, but it’s evident that there’s some genuine frustration there, lurking just under the surface.

Your head lolls over his shoulder and he angles his neck to look down at you. Hair falls over his eyes, and you’d fix it if he didn’t look so damn perfect. Everything about him looks intentional, like he was designed by someone who took great pride in their work. Not at all like you—a collage of features and spare parts you guess whatever force created you had lying around. Nothing about you feels on purpose. But that’s a hard thing to explain.

“I’m sorry. I know it’s impolite. It just feels disingenuous to accept compliments like that.”

Goosebumps arise on your arm where he touches you.

“You being polite isn’t what I’m concerned about. I just wish I could make you understand that I mean it when I compliment you. You’d know if I didn’t. I’m a terrible liar.”

That earns a giggle from you. Your boyfriend smiles, sparkling eyes darting over your face like he’s trying to bottle the sound, the memory—and you realize he probably is. What a terrifying thought. You look away, abashed once more.

“I’m a woman, Spencer. I’m not allowed to like myself. That’s the whole thing with Eve and the snake and the apple and whatever. Eternal inescapable shame.”

“Are you trying to justify your self-loathing by making it biblical? You know I’m the last person that would work on, right? Both as an agnostic-leaning-athiest and someone who thinks you’re beautiful and wonderful.”

Another groan claws its way from your throat as you slide down in embarrassment.

“You’re killing me here, Spencer.”

“What can I do to do to make you believe me?” he murmurs, carefully brushing tangles from your hair as you now rest practically prone across his lap. The ceiling light stretches behind him, haloing him in a soft glowing crown and making everything a bit more hazy and tolerable.

“It’s not your fight.” It’s meant to be playfully dramatic, but it hangs from your lips with a painful amount of earnestness.

“If it’s yours, it’s mine. That’s kind of the whole point of a relationship, right? Being a team?”

His fingers are nimble and warm between yours as you interlace them, steepling and bumping them together as you speak.

“Well, if you know so much, why are you asking me? It sounds like you know exactly what to do to make me magically love myself.”

A dangerous twitch plays at the corner of his lips as he gazes sleepily down at you.

“Oh, I have a few ideas. But I’m asking what you’d be comfortable with.”

“Whoa!” you blurt, giggling self-consciously, covering your face with your (and inadvertently one of his) hands. “Where did that come from?”

He smiles at your response to his mildly suggestive comment. “I lose my filter when I'm tired. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

You sigh gustily, dragging his hand down to fall over your collarbones. His fingers twitch over the delicate skin, like he’d graze it if your hand wasn’t weighing his down.

“No, no, you didn’t make me uncomfortable, you just… surprised me. I’m really bad at talking about this kind of thing.”

“Sex?”

You yelp, slinging your arm over your face and hiding in the crook of your elbow. “AH! Don’t say it!”

He laughs again, a little less reserved this time.

“What? You can’t even listen to me say the word?”

“No! Too scary!”

Eventually you peek out from under your arm to find Spencer still watching you. The humor has faded from his eyes and been replaced by a kind of serene calm. He brushes a lock of hair from your shoulder.

“Come here,” he says—a request more than a demand. With some wriggling and a bit of help, you manage to reorient yourself into a sitting position across his lap once more. His touch is warm even through the fabric of your dress when he kisses you, hand sliding over your waist before moving to trace your jaw and ending up on the back of your neck, urging you closer ever so slightly. You kiss him back without hesitation or restraint, as you delight in doing when he gives you the opportunity. What you may lack in experience and refinement, you make up for with affection and enthusiasm. He pulls away after a minute, much to your dismay, and brushes his thumb over your lips. For the first time, you think you see a hint of worry in his eyes. Guilt claws at your heart when he quietly asks, “you’re not scared of me, are you?”

“No!” You assure quickly, looping your arms around his neck. “No, it’s not you. You’re perfect and I’m sure you really mean all of the nice things you say. But I just… sometimes I worry I’ll scare you away once you realize I’m not as pretty or… good as you thought.”

“That’s impossible.”

Once more you let your head fall onto his shoulder. “You don’t know that.”

His hand begins running up and down your back, soothing your sympathetic nervous system in a way that all the deep breaths in the world never could.

“I know that I really, really like you. And there’s not one part of you that I don’t find genuinely beautiful. I can’t imagine not feeling that way about you.” Your eyes flutter shut and you hum against him—a non-answer, but he doesn’t push it. Minutes go by quietly, ticking later into the night as he continues mindlessly rubbing your back and watching you breathe. “Do you want me to take you home?” He finally asks after a long while. Again, you don’t respond. He smiles. “I know you’re awake.”

The corner of your lip twitches as you attempt to suppress a grin. Spencer sighs.

“I guess if you’re already asleep you’ll just have to stay here. But it would be convenient if you’d sleepwalk to my bed so that I don’t have to carry you.”

When you begin stirring and sitting up (one eye cracked to navigate) he laughs, hands on your waist. “Would you look at that. Who knew she would be so suggestible in non-REM?” You snort as you push yourself to a standing position using Spencer’s shoulders to support yourself, and ruining the whole act. He smiles up at you like you’re something divine and lets his hands trail over your hips.

“I sleep with my eyes open.”

“Do you often have coherent conversations in your sleep, too?”

You shrug. “I’m full of surprises.”

“I’m sure you are,” he agrees, finally standing himself. “I’m assuming you don’t want to sleep in your dress?”

“I have shorts on underneath I can wear, but a shirt would be helpful.”

“Then we’ll get you a shirt.”

———————————————

Ten minutes later you’re in Spencer’s bathroom, wearing your shorts and one of his sweatshirts (you cannot imagine Spencer in a hoodie), and wiping black sludge from your eyes with makeup remover he claims was left by a friend after a particularly festive Halloween party. Hopefully he’s telling the truth—you can think of more dubious potential origins of the eye-makeup remover in his bathroom. No toothbrush—you use your finger and a generous amount of toothpaste until the red wine stains fade.

Spencer is fixing the pillows when you exit the bathroom. You hold up your hands which are completely obscured and then some by the thick fabric of his sweatshirt.

“Fits like a dream,” you say. A smile tugs at his lips as he finishes his task, before raising his eyes to you. The smile promptly fades and it’s like the sun disappearing behind an oppressive gray cloud. In an instant your stomach curdles and you feel like crawling out of your skin.

“…what?” you mumble, absolutely terrified that the thing he’d said was impossible just minutes ago has already happened. Without makeup, without a fancy dress, you’re just you, and maybe that’s not good enough.

“Uh…” He blinks, as if he’s buffering for a moment, before snapping back into action, and notably looking away from you. “It’s—it’s nothing. Do you, um—here, I tried to make it—“

“Stop. Just tell me what that was. You got all weird.”

Another pause—he looks back up at you reluctantly with a sigh.

“I did not get all weird.”

“Yes, you did. You’re still being weird. It’s freaking me out.”

He’s utterly unreadable, which drives you fucking insane, when he eventually says, “come here.” This time, you think with a chill as you shuffle on your knees across the bed to sit in front of him, it really sounds like a demand. Spencer grabs your face in his hands, studying you intently. “I know you think I’ve finally decided you’re hideously deformed, but it’s actually just the opposite. I’m trying to figure out how to keep things polite for you.”

Realization dawns on you and the swarm of new butterflies in your stomach. The usual molten gold of his irises has been encroached upon, masked by blown pupils. Your face gets hot and your voice caves when you speak.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh,” he agrees quietly. “Do you believe me now?”

And to his credit, you really do. The hot skin, the vibrating cells in every fiber of your being, the racing heart—your body knows he means it. Part of you, the more confident, more desirous part, drags you closer to him, ghosts your lips over his. He chuckles.

“Now you’re getting brave?”

“Am I not allowed to kiss you?” you whisper, draping your arms over his shoulders.

“You’re allowed to do whatever you want.”

The words make you shiver—the lowered, gravelly tone of his voice you’ve never heard before snaps your resolve and you lean into him, connecting your lips with a deep urgency. Spencer inhales sharply, hands wandering to your waist and bearing down firmly as you press against him. When you lean back, he follows you, insists without saying a word that you don’t stop kissing him. It sends a thrill down your spine and between your legs, which both gives you pause and eggs you on. In the end, after a very brief internal struggle, curiosity and desire win. You drop to the bed and drag him down with you—he, your willing follower, blindly searches for purchase on the plush comforter. Now he’s on top of you, legs slotted together so that his thigh is temptingly close to your core. Too shy to actually do what you want to do, you clamp your thighs around his and tilt your hips, desperate for friction. He exhales heavily, slowly pulling his lips from yours like it’s the last thing he wants to do. Fingers dig into the flesh of your hip, not enough to ache but enough to draw your attention to your movements.

“What are you doing?” he asks, firmly, but not like you’re in trouble—it’s a probing question. He’s trying to figure out if you’re aware of the way you’re nearly riding his leg.

“I don’t know,” you admit breathlessly.

“You just told me you couldn’t even listen to me say the word sex,” Spencer reminds you. “You said it was too scary.”

A frustrated whine seems to catch him by surprise, and he laughs.

“That was a long time ago. I’ve matured since then.”

“Is that what happened?” he teases.

“Honestly, I’m just really turned on right now, please—" you cut yourself off, crashing your lips into his once more. And he almost relents.

Almost.

“Slow down.”

He ceases kissing you for a second time and you’re starting to really get annoyed.

“What?” you groan. “I thought you wanted this.”

His thumbs brush over the apples of your cheeks, demanding your attention.

“I want you. In every sense of the word. If you make a bad choice tonight and it means you don’t like me anymore tomorrow, that is the opposite of what I want. I’m not saying no. I’m just asking you to think about it for a second.”

You take a deep breath, closing your eyes and attempting to steady your mind and see beyond the thick fog of lust. What you find is a (mildly surprising) complete lack of fear. You’re not scared, like you thought you’d be; you feel utterly safe underneath him, with his hands on you and his heartbeat against your chest. This is a kind of intimacy you want to have with him.

Your eyes open to reveal his, close enough you can see the tiny flecks of green. And so much warmth. Everything about him is warm.

“This is what I want,” you assert. “I promise.”

His gaze flits between yours for a moment, pulling the truth from your soul like he might be able to find an imperfection there. But you mean it—and he seems satisfied. He trusts you, like you trust him.

“Okay.”

A sigh of relief never quite finds completion before he’s kissing you again. Immediately the fire is stoked once more, the heat between your legs getting warmer when he experimentally pushes his thigh against you. You breathe into the kiss, pressing down on him and surrendering to the unconscious rhythm of your hips. He lets that go on for a minute or two until you’re so distracted that you can’t kiss him back.

Unexpectedly he pulls away, disentangling himself from your legs. You stammer in frustration until his fingers hook under the soft material of your shorts. “Hips up.”

Wordlessly you comply, succumbing to his gentle words and touch. He bows to kiss you as he slides the fabric down unhurriedly. Once the shorts are gone, he sits up, and carefully lifts one of your legs over his lap, gaze unabashedly glued between them.

“Eyes up here,” you try to joke, but it’s steeped in self-consciousness and your heart is pounding. He manages, stroking the inside of your knee with a thumb as he leans down again.

“But you’re so pretty,” he murmurs, before he’s kissing you again. “Just like I knew you would be.”

You whimper when his hand skates over your stomach, lower, and lower, and—

“Tell me one more time, sweetheart.”

Your plead is just as hungry and yearning. “Please, Spencer?”

It works for him.

When his knuckles brush over your clit, you forget to breathe. When they barely skim your entrance, collecting arousal to drag back upward, your brain malfunctions. It is not enough, maddeningly so, but when he finds a careful, introductory rhythm, it’s immediately bordering on too much, too good.

Your stomach tenses and you are surprised by your own sighs and hesitant gasps as you try to adjust to the feeling of someone else’s hand between your legs.

“Does that feel good?” he murmurs against your lips.

“Mhm,” you chirp. Slow but insistent circles elicit a cry that gets caught in your throat, melting into a hum. Your eyes are closed, but you can hear the smile in Spencer’s voice.

“You’re sensitive, huh?”

“S—sometimes.”

He hums contemplatively.

“Sometimes? Can you tell me about that?”

You can’t hardly think around those gentle movements of his hand, let alone speak. He touches you like you’re something delicate. It’s torturous and perfect. But you try to answer anyway, managing to keep the stammering to a minimum.

“About what?”

“I want to know what you think about when you touch yourself.” The smooth words in tandem with an incremental increase in pressure earn your first real moan. Timid and unpracticed, but very genuine.

The answer comes immediately afterward; thoughtlessly and on a shuddering exhalation.

“You.”

“Yeah?” he smiles. “Good answer.”

Your eyes open fractionally to study his expression. You’d felt so much shame every time you’d imagined him in your bed late at night.

“Really?”

“Really. And now look at you. Letting me do it for you.” As if to remind you, he speeds up the motion of his hand. On instinct you bring your fingers to your lips as you moan through a closed throat, partly to stifle the noise and partly because you don’t know what to do with the hand that’s not gripping the duvet. “Do you only touch here?” His fingers slide down to your slick entrance and your hips buck, mourning the loss of stimulation. “Or do you touch here, too?”

You shake your head, breathing hard as he teases a finger around the soft place you’ve never really bothered to explore. “Never feels good when I try.”

“We’re gonna make it feel good, okay?”

You nod hesitantly, leaning back into the pillows when he kisses you again.

His lips are so distracting, so intoxicating you almost forget what he’s doing until he does it. It’s a foreign sensation—not entirely pleasant or unpleasant. For a moment or two your brows furrow as you focus on the feeling, worried that maybe you’re broken just as you thought—until you feel a slight stretch and you realize he’s pushing a second finger into you now. A kiss lands on your cheek when you grab his arm with a choked gasp, and he mutters, “deep breaths,” into your ear. “I know it’s new, honey, just breathe.”

“Fuck,” you whimper as you look down, and you didn’t realize you were going to say it until it’s already passed between your lips. Pressure begins melding with the promise of pleasure, and something about watching his hand move between your legs—the tendons flexing and wrist bending as he eases into what is clearly a perfected motion—arouses you so much you moan at the sight alone. Flipping pages is all you thought that hand was meant for. It’s like a secret revealed as you watch it do something so salacious, and to you.

A hot spark of pleasure flares deeper in you than you’ve ever felt. It catches and grows faster than you’d of thought—suddenly you can feel everything and it all feels better than you thought possible. Your jaw drops and a surprised huff of air blows a strand of your hair away.

“Oh my god,” comes your breathy little whisper, unprepared for and intimidated by how good he’s making you feel. Filthy noises come from between your legs and you clench around his fingers. You had no idea you could make those noises. You had no idea you could get so wet.

“Yeah, there we go.” His voice sounds a little further away now. You manage to tear your eyes away from all the action to his face. Much like you, he’s transfixed by the sight, brow furrowed and pretty lips parted in what could be concentration, or some sort of empathetic pleasure. His face has more color to it than usual and his breaths come heavier—it’s a very pleasant sight. Suddenly his fingers brush against a spot deep within you and your hips cant upward, a mewl pulled from the depths of your throat that has more control over you than you do it. Spencer’s eyes flash back to you, a grin playing at his lips. He does it again, looking right into your eyes, and you whine so pitifully your face flushes.

“Too much?” he asks. You shake your head firmly, arching your back when he unconsciously slows down. At your response his fingers begin rutting into you again, committing to that spot inside you that makes you see stars. “Of course not. You’re gonna take whatever I give you, huh?”

“Uh-huh,” you nod. You’d do just about anything for him right at this second. Spencer holds an immense amount of power over you in this moment, and potentially in all future moments moving forward. But you trust him with it.

“You don’t have anything to prove to me. I just want you to feel good. You’ll tell me if it’s too much, right?”

But it’s really not too much. It’s exactly right. Your verbal capacity is acutely limited right now, so you can’t exactly say it, but you lock eyes with him and whine shamelessly, hips twisting against his hand. You think he gets the message.

Hair falls over his face and he doesn’t fix it, opting instead to alternate his gaze between your cunt and face, cursing to himself lowly. You wouldn’t want him to stop and fix his hair—what you want is this, for him to keep pushing you toward that elusive edge and to keep looking at you like you put all the stars in the sky.

“Look at you, my pretty girl. I’m so proud of you. I know this isn’t easy. I know you were scared. Thank you for letting me do this, honey.”

It’s the unexpected tenderness of the words, perfectly misplaced in the context of the moment. It’s the devotion, the honesty in his eyes, shining through the haze of lust, which makes your stomach drop and all your muscles tense. A million thoughts jumble in your head, dizzying and thrilling and confusing, but mostly all you can think is Spencer, Spencer, Spencer. Is this how it always is? Your hands tangle in the sheets—and then all the thoughts vanish. Everything is warm and fuzzy and sparkling clean, no worries, no lingering thoughts, no self-awareness at all. It’s nirvana. It’s revelatory. It’s ridiculous that he did this all in under five minutes and you haven’t been able to do it once even with very concerted effort.

Slowly you float back into your body, breathing hard and watching through half-lidded eyes as Spencer gently pulls his hand away. Without him you feel weirdly empty and cold, like he should have been there all along. But his touch isn’t absent for long—he runs his hand over the bridge between your hips, little finger dipping into the crease of your thigh.

“That’s never… I’ve never done that before,” you admit, slurring your words only slightly.

His perfect features contort into a half-frown, half-smile.

“You’ve never had an orgasm?” You nod. His head tilts. “Really? You didn’t tell me that.”

“When would I have told you?” you laugh, finding his waist with your hand and encouraging him to settle his weight on you. He does, burying his face in your neck and exhaling heavily.

“Well?” you ask shyly, skating your fingers over his back. “Did I do it right?”

Spencer snorts, but presses a sickeningly sweet kiss to the curve of your neck.

“Did you like it?”

“Yes,” you admit, voice smaller than you’d have liked. He pushes himself up onto his forearms and kisses you softly.

“Then we both did it right.”

“But…” you stare up into his warm honey eyes, searching for any bits of hidden truth you can find. He brushes a strand of hair away from your face, utterly unconcerned. “You know what I mean.”

“I do,” he agrees, “and I’ll say this because I know otherwise you’re going to worry about it forever.” He studies your face reverently for a moment, before parting his lips to speak. The words are slow to come, like he’s trying to figure the sentence out as he goes along. “You… are going to be, problematic, for me.”

Your whisper is almost as small as you feel under his heavy gaze. “What d’you mean?”

“I mean,” Spencer begins, voice low, “I think I liked that too much. Do you see why that’s troubling?”

The flame you thought had been quenched flickers back to life like a pilot light. Your thighs press together to alleviate a growing ache in a still sensitive area and you answer, “no,” with a small shake of your head. His thumb tenderly traces your jaw, ever-patient despite the fact that you’re obviously playing coy.

“Because I can’t have you all the time.”

“Yes you can,” you say without hesitation, though your eyes are fluttering. “You can have me whenever you want. Right now.”

He hums, pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“Not tonight. You’ve had enough. You’re tired.”

“I’m wide awake,” you slur, tangling a hand in his hair even as you lose the battle against your eyelids.

He sighs good-naturedly, gently wrapping his fingers around your wrist and brushing his lips over the delicate skin.

“You’re shockingly precocious.”

You hum.

“You just unleashed the beast. You’re like Doctor Frankenstein.”

He chuckles, sitting up and finding your shorts. You manage to be semi-helpful, lifting your legs at appropriate junctures as he tugs your clothing back on. “And you’re a nerd.”

“I don’t need to take that from you of all people.”

“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that,” Spencer says, and the smile in his voice makes you smile, a quarter asleep as he leans over to turn off the lamp on your side of the bed before tugging the covers over both of you.

He pulls you close in the dark, releasing a deep sigh as you curl into him. His heartbeat is steady against your ear, his arms warm around you. You can imagine making a home for yourself here. And you don’t know if he’s thinking it, but you hope he is, as you are silently repeating to yourself with every beat of his heart;

I love you

I love you.

part two

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid smut #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x self insert #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid fic #criminal minds #criminal minds smut #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine

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gdinthehouseee · 2 months ago

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224: KWON JI-YONG x READER

summary: after being indecisive on the design, you finally get a matching tattoo with ji-yong

word count: 2504

tags: fluff, flirting, smau bonus - (if you have tattoos we'll pretend this was your first ever tattoo, for the plot ofc) also your usernames are within the images :pp

“You know,” Ji-yong muses, tracing lazy circles on your arm as you lay tangled together on the couch, “I still think we should get matching tattoos.”

You roll your eyes with a small laugh. “You’ve been saying that for months.”

“Because I mean it.” He props himself up on his elbow, watching you with that signature smirk—the one that always spells trouble. “I’m covered in them, and you still don’t have a single one. It’s kind of unfair.”

“You say that like I haven’t wanted one,” you argue, nudging his chest. “I’m just… picky. If I’m going to have something on my body forever, it has to be perfect.”

He hums, nodding like he understands, but then his lips curl mischievously. “Oh, I know you’re picky. That’s why I’m mentally preparing myself for the five-hour deliberation when we finally go.”

You scoff. “It won’t take five hours.”

“Mm. No, you’re right. Six hours at least.”

You swat at him, and he laughs, catching your wrist before lacing your fingers together. “I’m just saying,” he murmurs, his thumb brushing over your knuckles, “you overthink things, and I think this is one of those times you don’t have to. It’s about meaning, not just aesthetics.”

You exhale slowly, your fingers idly playing with the chain around his neck. “That’s the thing, though. I want it to mean something. If I get a tattoo, I don’t want to regret it in ten years.”

He studies you for a moment, his expression shifting from playful to soft. “I get that,” he says, voice quieter now. “That’s why I want to get something with you. Because I know I’d never regret it.”

You and Ji-yong have never needed grand gestures to prove what you already know—you're in this for life. It’s something you’ve both made clear, in whispered confessions late at night, in the way his fingers always find yours in a crowded room, in the unshakable certainty that no matter what, you’d always choose each other. Marriage is definitely in the cards, something you’ve talked about more than once, not as a distant "what if" but as an inevitable when. But a tattoo? That’s something different. Something permanent in a way that even rings aren’t, ink pressed into skin as a quiet, unwavering promise. If you were going to do this—if—you wanted it to be right. You wanted it to truly mean something.

Your heart clenches at the sincerity in his tone, but before you can dwell on it too much, he smirks again. “But since you’re the most indecisive person on the planet, I might have to take matters into my own hands.”

You raise a brow, already suspicious. “And what exactly does that mean?”

“I was thinking... tiny cartoon dragons.”

A groan slips from your lips as you shove his face away, making him laugh. “Ji-yong, no. If I’m getting my first tattoo, it’s not going to be a cartoon dragon.”

“Okay, okay, how about this?” He shifts, pulling out his phone. “We could get something cool—like a symbol, maybe. Or lyrics from a song.” He scrolls through images for a moment before holding up a picture of a delicate script tattoo. “Something simple, like this?”

You tilt your head, considering it. “I like that, but… I don’t know.”

“See?” He grins, nudging your cheek with his nose. “Picky.”

“Thoughtful,” you correct, flicking his forehead.

He chuckles, tucking his face against your shoulder. “Yeah, yeah. Same thing.”

You smile softly, the idea still floating in your mind. You do want a tattoo, but you want it to be right. Something that matters, something that’s yours. And knowing Ji-yong, he’ll wait as long as you need.

“Alright,” he murmurs, pressing a lingering kiss just below your jaw. “I’ll be patient—for now. But the second you figure it out, I’m taking you straight to the shop. No second-guessing.”

You shake your head, amused. “We’ll see about that.”

His lips brush against your skin again, warm and teasing. “Mark my words, jagiya. One day, you’ll be the one begging me to go first.”

You scoff, but the thought lingers in your mind long after the conversation ends. Maybe he’s right. Maybe one day will be sooner than you think. For the entire week following said conversation, you were kept awake by all the different design possibilities—including everything wrong with them, critiquing every Pinterest board you came across, analysing them like you were a professional.

Like the previous few nights: it’s late—one of those nights where the world outside feels distant, the only sounds in the room are the slow hum of the air conditioning and Ji-yong’s steady breathing beside you. You should be sleeping, but instead, you’re lying on your back, phone in hand, scrolling through tattoo ideas for what feels like the hundredth time.

Ji-yong shifts, his arm tightening around your waist as he buries his face against your shoulder. “You’re thinking too hard again,” he mumbles, voice thick with sleep. “I can hear it.”

You let out a breathy laugh, locking your phone and setting it aside. “You can hear me thinking?”

“Yes,” he groans, shifting onto his elbow to squint at you through heavy-lidded eyes. “It’s loud. Annoyingly loud.”

You roll onto your side to face him, resting your cheek against the pillow. “Well, I can’t help it. This is permanent—I want to get it right.”

He sighs dramatically, dragging a hand down his face. “This is worse than when you take an hour to pick a restaurant.”

“Excuse me, that’s an important decision,” you argue. “I need to weigh all my options.”

“It’s food.”

“It’s life or death.”

He huffed a laugh, then pokes your forehead lightly. “See? This is exactly what I mean. You’re gonna think yourself into oblivion if you don’t chill.” He drags you closer until your head is against his chest, his fingers absentmindedly tracing shapes along your back. “We could get anything, and it wouldn’t change a thing. You and me? We’re already forever. Today, tomorrow, and every day after that.”

That’s it! Something clicks in your mind, the way puzzle pieces snap into place. You sit up slightly, your fingers gripping his shirt. “Ji-yong.”

He hums, eyes half-closed. “Mm?”

“What about 224?”

His brows furrow. “224?”

You nod, heartbeat picking up. “Today, tomorrow, forever.”

There’s a beat of silence. Then—his eyes widen slightly, like the meaning is settling in, like it’s really hitting him. He blinks. “Wait.” A slow, almost disbelieving smile tugs at his lips. “You came up with this?”

“Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?”

He grins, propping himself up on one elbow. “I mean, I’ve been watching you spiral for days over this, and now you suddenly come up with something perfect? My words finally got through to you, huh?”

You roll your eyes. “I hate that you’re right.”

He chuckles, shaking his head as he repeats the numbers under his breath. “224… today, tomorrow, forever...” Then, suddenly, his expression shifts—his brows lift slightly, his lips parting as if something just hit him. He shoots up, sitting fully upright now, eyes wide.

“Oh my god.”

You blink, startled. “What?”

Ji-yong grabs your hands, his excitement bubbling over. “Two plus two plus four!”

“What?”

“It adds up to eight!” His grip tightens as he shakes your hands a little, like he can’t contain himself. “Eight!”

You blink again. “And?”

He looks borderline offended. “Aein. Eight is my number.”

Realization washes over you. You’ve known about his obsession with the number for years—the symbol of his recent comeback. And now, your number ties into it.

Ji-yong laughs, running a hand through his hair as he stares at you, looking completely smitten. “This is fate. You—” He cuts himself off, then groans dramatically. “You’re gonna make me fall in love with you all over again.”

You laugh. “Now you’re being dramatic.”

“I’m serious!” He cups your face, tilting it up so you can see just how much he means it. “224. Eight. You and me, forever.”

You grin, warmth spreading through your chest. “So we’re doing it?”

“Oh, we’re definitely doing it.” His hands slide down to your waist, pulling you onto his lap in one swift motion. “And I’m making sure everyone knows you came up with it, but I made it iconic.”

You snort, swatting at his chest. “You are unbearable.”

Ji-yong smirks, leaning in to kiss you—slow, deep, certain. But he doesn’t stop at just one kiss. The moment he has you in his lap, his lips are everywhere—pressing soft, lingering kisses to your cheeks, your jaw, the tip of your nose. He hums against your skin, grinning between each press of his lips, murmuring little praises like, "My smart girl," and "how did I get so lucky?" Before capturing your lips again. His hands keep you close, fingers tracing absentminded patterns along your back, as if he can’t bear to let go. When he pulls away just enough to catch his breath, he takes one look at your dazed expression and dives back in, peppering kisses along your collarbone, your shoulder, up the curve of your neck, until you're giggling, overwhelmed by the sheer warmth of his affection.

The excitement lingers between you both for days, the decision feeling more perfect with each passing moment. When the appointment finally arrives, Ji-yong insists on making a whole day out of it—because, of course, he does.

You find yourselves at a sleek, upscale tattoo studio, the kind that feels both exclusive and effortlessly cool, much like him. Ji-yong has been here before—he greets the artist like an old friend, all easy smiles and playful banter, while you stand there, heart pounding just a little. He catches your hesitation immediately. His fingers brush against yours before lacing them together, giving your hand a light squeeze. “Nervous?” he asks, tilting his head with that knowing smirk.

You sigh, shifting slightly on your feet. “Maybe a little. I mean, it’s my first tattoo.”

He grins. “And I get to be part of it. I get to be your first.” He leans in, voice dipping playfully. “You sure you can handle that, jagiya?”

You roll your eyes, shoving at his shoulder. “You make everything sound suggestive.”

He laughs, pulling you closer. “I’m just saying, it’s a big deal.” He presses a quick kiss to your temple before nudging you toward the tattoo chair. “Come on, let’s make history.”

The artist preps everything, and before long, the stencil of 224 is placed on your skin, just beneath your wrist. You stare at it, taking in the simple yet meaningful numbers. It already feels like a part of you.

Ji-yong watches you carefully, his thumb rubbing slow circles against your other wrist. “Looks good?”

You nod, exhaling. “Yeah. More than good.”

He grins, looking genuinely proud. “Then let’s do this.”

When the needle touches your skin, you brace yourself—but Ji-yong is right there, his hand never leaving yours, his voice low and reassuring. “You’re doing so good,” he murmurs, squeezing your fingers lightly. “Told you it wouldn’t be that bad.”

“Says the guy covered in tattoos.”

“Fair.”

When it’s his turn, he barely even flinches, watching with an easy, satisfied smile as the same numbers are inked into his skin. When it’s done, he lifts his arm beside yours, comparing the matching tattoos with a pleased hum.

“Perfect,” he says simply. Then, he turns to you, eyes softening. “Just like us.”

Your heart swells. And when he kisses you right there in the chair, not caring about the artist’s amused snort, you know there’s no one else you’d rather have by your side—today, tomorrow, forever.

The buzz of adrenaline from getting the tattoo still lingers as you step out of the shop, his fingers laced with yours once again, his grip warm and steady. He swings your joined hands between you as he smirks down at your fresh ink. “We did it. Matching tattoos. No going back now, baby.”

You glance up at him with a teasing glint in your eye. “Oh, I don’t know… I hear laser removal is pretty advanced these days.”

His mouth drops open in exaggerated offense. “Excuse me?”

You bite back a smile, shrugging. “I mean, if you ever get sick of me—”

He cuts you off immediately, tugging you flush against him. “Not a damn chance,” he murmurs, voice low and certain. “You’re stuck with me now. Today, tomorrow, forever, remember?”

Your heart flips, but you refuse to let him have the upper hand that easily. Smirking, you trace your fingers along the collar of his jacket. “Guess I should start thinking about what other permanent marks I wanna leave on you, then.”

His eyes darken just slightly, a slow grin spreading across his face. “Oh, now we’re talking.”

Dinner is at one of your favorite spots, a place tucked away from prying eyes, where dim lighting and soft music make everything feel intimate. Ji-yong insists on ordering for both of you, leaning across the table with his usual confidence. “Trust me, I know exactly what you need.”

And, annoyingly, he’s right. The food is perfect.

Midway through the meal, you glance down at your hand resting on the table, the fresh tattoo peeking out from under your sleeve. The sight of it still feels surreal—permanent proof of something that was never in question. You reach for your phone, snapping a quick picture before turning to Ji-yong. “Should I post it?”

His eyes light up instantly. “You want to?”

You shrug, smirking. “Well, I mean… it’d be kind of cruel not to let everyone lose their minds over it.”

He grins, leaning forward with clear excitement. “Oh, I love when you’re the troublemaker.”

Laughing, you tap out a caption, keeping it simple but meaningful.

As soon as you hit post, your phone explodes with notifications. Fans are already freaking out, but the real fun starts when you notice familiar names popping up in the comments.

Ji-yong, who has been watching you with amusement, leans over slightly. “Alright, who’s losing it the most?”

You scroll through, grinning. “Let’s see…”

Daesung: I knew it. You two are disgusting. (Also, congrats 😭❤️)

CL: Finally. My favorite power couple stays winning.

ROSE: 224… I’m emotional. This is beautiful.

Seunghyun: A timeless commitment. Very fitting.

Minzy: Love is real 😭💜

Taeyang: Ok but who cried first? Be honest.

Ji-yong snorts at that last one. “Should I comment back and expose you?”

You shoot him a look. “Me? Don’t even try it. You were the one getting all sentimental about forever first.”

“That’s because I meant it.”

Your heart does that annoying little flip again, and before he can tease you for it, you shake your head, grinning as you type a response to Taeyang:

You already know it was him.

“Wow. Betrayal.”

You just laugh, sliding your phone across the table. “Here, go defend your honor.”

Instead of taking it, he leans in, pressing a slow, lingering kiss to your lips. “Nah,” he murmurs. “I’ve got better things to do.”

taglist: @thanosscrossmain @maskedcrawford @mirahyun @riddlerloveb0t @onyxmango @sherrayyyyy @seunghyunwifey @petersasteria @allthoughtsmindfull

#kwon jiyong #kwon jiyong x reader #gdragon #gdragon x reader #bigbang #bigbang x reader #fluff #tattoo #kpop x reader #kpop

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genieswishes · 1 month ago

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okay okay but hear me out right. slow soft sex with saxon who gets super freaked out because he was trying to do his usual thing and then it got real vulnerable all of a sudden and he doesn’t know how to feel about it after….BUT he knows it got vulnerable because he actually felt safe with her and blah blah blah or whatever. i think about him. that man needs to be fucked real gentle and lovingly or something.

anon, I like the way your mind works… I’ve added some plot to this though so bear with me in the first half…

let me be in your life like that ft. Saxon Ratliff

MDNI 18+

cw: obsessive(?) Saxon, established relationship, fluff, p in v (unprotected), “babe” as a pet name, mentions of oral (f! receiving), mentions of cheating (not followed through)

a/n: re-read it and now I have to write rafe & him tag teaming or something... idk the things going on in my head are devious rn. Title inspired by Ariana Grande’s “west side”

Not that SAXON RATLIFF ever thought of himself as the loyal kind, but he’s just been so uninterested in any girl other than you. Well, any one other than you. Understand that he would never admit that he’s a shit boyfriend; in every relationship before this, there was always a point where he’d wake up to realize how little he cared for his current partner. There was a whole twitter “exposé” at one point from one of the sorority girls he dated. Something about how much of a douchebag he was and that “he’s the equivalent to a community bike.” So with that in mind, he can’t help but be confused about his current predicament.

He’s away from you, on some business trip in the Outer Banks to close up a deal with some investors. Really, it’s more like a vacation; hot girls in the most scantily clad bikinis, (other) out of touch nepo babies on their week long vacation trip, and all the great restaurants, of course.

But get this, he can’t get his dick up. Like at all. Every time, he would bring someone back to his room, and bam! He’s got whiskey dick. Not that he could even fall back on that. Half of the time, he wasn’t even drunk. He’s never had this problem before. Rather, the opposite. Always needing another warm body. Always needing someone new. Which is why it’s such a perplexing experience to come to terms that he’s being haunted by you. From his wet dreams to any time he’s getting hard, it’s always about you, you, you.

So, maybe he needs to fuck you out of his system. Have his way with you on his bed, in the bathroom, in his car. And when that doesn’t work out, he figures he needs to go to your place; smell your sheets when he has you pressed into him, use your shampoo when he’s got you in the shower, eat you out as breakfast on your kitchen counter. Just anything to work you out of his head.

He thinks it’s finally working. He’s over at your place again, nose buried in your hair to smell that fresh shampoo as your legs dangle over his shoulders. Y’know, to really ram into your cervix. He swears he’s starting to feel that same sort of boredom he’s gotten with all his past relationships. Suppose that after today, he’ll be done with you and onto the next.

But, he makes a mistake. He kisses you. And it doesn’t feel like those “heat-of-the-moment” kisses. Matter of fact, it’s something much too foreign to him. Your nose is bumping his, and your lips are entirely too soft. How is it that the way he’s fucking you is so savage, but every touch of you makes him confront those weird butterflies in his stomach? How has he never noticed how you scrunch your nose? That you laugh with your whole chest? Or how your smile lines enrich your expression?

“Saxon?” You’ve got lilt to your voice that he can’t bring himself to snap out of. “You good?”

Somehow, you don’t even realize what you’re doing with your eyes.

“You have no idea what you’re doing to me, do you?”

“What are you talking about, you weirdo?” God, how is it that even your giggle is infectious?

He rolls his hips slowly, almost experimentally. He catches how you gasp a bit at that, rolling once more at a much slower pace.

“Please, babe, keep doing that.” Your legs are around his waist now, but he’s taking his time rocking back and forth, reveling at how your breath hitches when he circles your bud.

You’re kissing at his shoulders, hand massaging through his hair, and he doesn’t ever want to leave this moment. He whines at how you’re touching him. Soft, high moans that sort of catch you off guard. It makes you feel so good to know he’s enjoying himself though.

He’s kissing the nape of your neck, leaving deep hickeys in his wake. Then he’s at your lips again, gently. As if he’s scared he’s going to break you. As if all the time before he wasn’t going crazy on you.

“Ugh, I think I’m going to…” Saxon is rutting into you now, fingers still on your clit.

“Okay, fuck, don’t pull out…”

“huh?”

“Inside! Just cum inside!”

Your legs are tied around him, and you’re so tight that Saxon couldn’t even pull out if he wanted to. He’s so deep in you that he wouldn’t even be surprised if you told him your Plan B didn’t work out. He figures he would cross that bridge when he gets there.

For now, he’d rather enjoy basking in the heat of the sunlight to cuddle you with.

#saxon ratliff x reader #fem reader #gw: drabble #fanfiction #the white lotus #saxon ratliff #smut #white lotus

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spikershoyo · 2 months ago

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loving machine | oscar piastri x reader, ex!lando norris x ex!reader | smut, angst | minors DNI!

warnings, tags, and notes: smut, angst, hurt no comfort, rebound oscar, no use of (Y/N), I love lando but he's a massive dick in this, implied Magui (ew), oral sex (fem receiving), pussy-drunk oscar, fingering, breath play (fem towards masc), unprotected P in V (wrap before you tap, kids!), reader denies oscar a creampie lol, time skips throughout the fic, wrote this with a tragic Christmas vibe in mind, mentions of drinking and being drunk, oscar just wants to love someone, inspired by 'loving machine' by tv girl, this came to me randomly and now we're here, enjoy! <3

Breakups are never easy. Especially when it comes to breaking up with Lando Norris. He's a sweetheart all around and maybe one of the kindest people you've ever met, but when he gets angry he can become one of the meanest and cruelest people out there.

You both didn't love each other like you expected. It should have been a mutual understanding, things simply fizzled out and didn't work, but Lando firmly believed you were the gift that kept on giving.

And that made a wound bloom between you two. Lando demanded to know why you didn't love him anymore when he wasn't giving you a reason to continue. When free, he'd come home late, sometimes alone, sometimes with Max in tow, usually tipsy. His best friend would give you a blank stare and what you thought was a sorry smile.

Lando doesn't speak to you anymore. And you're finally relieved. There isn't much more that you could have done to keep that relationship alive.

You're at the doctor's office today, a dreary Tuesday morning in London. You've had sporadic headaches that felt more like migraines than anything. You've waited almost a week for your appointment. Doesn't matter, you're here now.

The artificial light in the waiting room makes your eyes water and your temple ache, feeling just as terrible. You'll get the pills and it will go away. It always does. You decide to close your eyes and rest for a bit.

Time feels like molasses behind your eyes, the darkness comforting but shaky. You feel a bit nauseous. And then someone calls out your name.

You open your eyes, expecting to see an assistant with their name list and beckoning you inside. But instead, you're met with soft brown eyes and a familiar face. You blink once, then twice. "Oscar?" You croak out, not expecting your voice to be as rough as it sounds.

The Aussie gives you a shy smile, familiar with how you and Lando left things. It feels a bit illegal to Oscar to see you and not Lando by your side. "Hi," He says softly, his tone hesitant, as if approaching a wild, scared animal. "Didn't, um, expect to see you here."

"At the doctor's office?" You ask him, a bit annoyed at his question. Oscar blinks a few times, quickly, and shakes his head. "No! No, uh, in London. You know," But you don't really know. It's just a filler. "Isn't Silverstone an hour's drive from here?"

Oscar looks down at you, still standing still in front of your feet, less than a foot away from you. He looks you over, really looks, and shifts his weight from foot to foot. "Well, yeah. I've been having some aches in my knee, my trainer told me to go here."

It sounds strange, but you shouldn't care which doctor Oscar goes to. You shouldn't care if Lando goes to this doctor, too, when he's in London. "Oh, sorry to hear that." He shakes his head in a silent, "Don't worry."

You look up at him and the seat, a small offer. And Oscar complies. He sits next to you and fidgets a bit. You don't look at him, nor do either of you speak much. Time drags on a bit and you each wait for your appointments to end, two prescription bottles in each of your hands.

"Are you doing anything now?" Oscar asks you before you reach for the door handle of the waiting room. You're stunned at his question. What would Oscar Piastri want to do with you? And yet, you entertain the idea, a small flutter in your stomach.

A nagging feeling tells you no, but your pettiness and need are screaming yes!

Blonde and blue flash before your eyes and you remember the times you'd spent scrolling through Instagram handles, looking at Lando's posts, F1 gossip blogs, the pretty smile that haunted your dreams every other night.

Jealousy is a disgusting feeling.

Oscar watches the cogs turn in your head, the offer open until you speak. His eyes travel to your hands, gripping the door handle tightly. Regard her with interest. Let her know she's being heard. Always be polite. Those are all tricks his uncle had once told him at some old Christmas party, giving a 15-year-old Oscar a 101 on flirting.

And when you slightly move, his eyes are back on you. Oscar smiles when you shake your head. A shy smile, somewhat pink in the cheeks. Flames lick in the inside of his stomach. "Can I interest you in some tea then?"

You look up at him and nod. "Yes."

Oscar realizes that he'd much rather have you sink on his cock than win any Grand Prix. It's a crazy thought, the hunger for winning dissipating when you moan in his ear, gripping onto his shoulders with intense need.

He selfishly thinks that he can fuck you better than Lando.

Tea is on the table, the steam gone from the two mugs on the small coffee table in Oscar's hotel room. Instead, he's kissing you on the couch, gentle and giddy.

Your panties are discarded in a pile of clothes along with his boxers. Oscar bounces you steadily on his dick, quickly becoming addicted to the feeling of you. Your hands slide up from his shoulders, settling on his neck, squeezing a bit. Oscar's eyes gloss over and he chuckles breathlessly.

"You're so pretty," He groans, his hands gripping your waist as he moves you a bit faster. Your eyes flutter closed as you moan, gasping when he hits deeply in you. "Oh, Oscar!" You cry out, pleasure wracking over your entire being.

You hope Lando hears you through the hotel walls.

I don't want anything serious.

The words suddenly echo in Oscar's mind as he's holding the Hungary trophy. He remembers the text you had sent him after Silverstone. Still high off his first win, as shitty as it had been.

He gulps and looks at his teammate. Lando was stormy-faced for various reasons. Still, his eyes blur when he stares for too long.

Oscar knows that Lando knows. He'd seen you leave Oscar's hotel room back when they were in the UK. He remembers how Lando's lips parted, ocean-green eyes widening a bit as if he'd seen a ghost.

And Oscar had also seen the satisfaction in your eyes, he knew you weren't good for him, not in the long run. You were just fun. Oscar could use a bit of fun in his life.

And yet, when he sees you again, this time standing in front of your London apartment, he feels that fluttering feeling all over again. He’s never going to be the first choice and that’s alright. He’s fine with just sex and jokes, helping you around the apartment if needed. Oscar was taught to always give back, and you gave him so much. Even if sometimes he wished you’d give him a little more. But it’s okay, he’ll settle by whispering please, love me into your back when you fall asleep in his arms.

Abu Dhabi is huge for McLaren. Huge for Oscar, huge for Lando. It makes you sick in the stomach when you see rumors of a new girl on Lando's arm. You should hate him, but the thought that he's moved on so quickly makes you itch.

Oscar scratches that itch.

He's sweet and he's funny with his particular dry sense of humor. You like Oscar. He's nice company. He fucks good too.

He thrusts deeper, more methodically, deft fingers always leaving you with fried nerves and buzzed. He was almost perfect.

Sure, he didn't pull your hair like you liked. And maybe he didn't spank your ass as hard as you'd like, but you chalked it up to him being gentle. It's fine.

You hate to compare Oscar to Lando. He doesn't deserve that.

And yet you do. You compare the tan skin to his pale one, the ocean green to the woody brown, the curls that seemed to flatten out in softer waves.

Sometimes, and even then, you kiss the two moles that rest on Oscar's neck, the ones that look like a misplaced vampire bite. You kiss them and imagine you're kissing the moles on Lando's face. The one closer to his eye and the other resting over his smile line.

It fills you with a bit of guilt but that's alright, opting to simply run your hands down Oscar's chest and give him a pretty smile. A silent conversation that ends in sex. Just an exchange.

Oscar comes over for a while, wanting to spend time with you before he returns home for Christmas. You offered him a small pre-Christmas dinner and who was he to decline?

He even arrives with a little gift in his hand, looking a bit silly with his Santa hat. "Hi," He smiles, cheeks pink from the cold and from you.

"Hi," You smile, too, and blink a few times. "Take that off, you look stupid," You reach for the hat and take it off his head, messing his hair up a bit. Oscar just chuckles. "Sorry."

Things seem to run in a routine. The door closes behind him and he's pulling you in for a kiss. "Missed you," He admits against your lips. You're not listening, simply kissing him back.

You make pasta and you eat quietly with Oscar. It feels weirdly domestic and that makes your chest tighten uncomfortably. These are just two people who fuck eating together, normal stuff.

After dinner, you're both lying on the floor next to your Christmas tree, all the lights mixing together and casting a slight red glow over the Aussie. Oscar looks contemplative, as usual.

You, you're simply looking at him. You boldly reach out and trace a finger down the slope of his nose, a faint smile on your lips. Oscar turns to look at you, eyes glimmering under the Christmas lights.

It's poetic in a tragic way. You know you're going to hurt him, but you can't bring yourself to put an end to this now.

His hands come and touch, grabbing your wrists and gently pinning you down on the wooden floor. Oscar kisses down your neck, mouthing, and nipping slowly, his fingers unbuttoning your comfy Christmas pajama top, the flannel being peeled off of you swiftly. He kisses over your chest, giving love to each nipple.

He dares to stare at you with those precise and loving eyes, the color of his iris burning into your mind. Chocolate brown, you smile at the thought. A soft moan escapes you then.

Oscar's cheeks are hot and flushed, pulling at the tiny matching pajama shorts, seeing that you're soaked to the touch. He runs a thumb down your clothed slit, your thighs twitching at the featherlight contact.

The Aussie kneels down, resting comfortably on his stomach as he pulls your legs over his shoulders, pressing little kisses to your pussy. It's all a haze as you let your head fall back at the sight. "Yes, yes," You chant, urging Oscar to continue.

Your panties are pulled off and he doesn't waste time diving in, making out with your pretty cunt, eyes half-lidded and concentrated. He whines into your core a bit, thumb pressing down onto your clit softly as he tongue-fucks you.

Hands pull at the roots of his hair, and breathy moans and cries of his name are heard throughout the apartment—a sight to behold.

Oscar knows what you like. He likes what you want because Oscar likes you.

And he doesn't stop eating you out like a man starved until he's pulled two orgasms out of you. By then, his aching cock is begging for attention. He pulls you up onto his lap, snapping you out of your little reverie. Oscar pushes his joggers down and sinks you onto his cock, keeping a steady rhythm to satiate the hunger he has for you.

You both gasped in unison at the smooth intrusion, his pace was desperate and rough, pounding into you like no tomorrow. "You feel so tight, sweetheart," He moans as his hands wrap around your waist. You're a babbling mess, a bit wrecked from the immense pleasure.

"Oh, fuck, cum for me again," Oscar pleads, eyes searching for yours before pulling you into a kiss. You nod frantically into the messy kiss, gasping as he angles his hips to hit deeper. "Yeah, yes! F-feels so good, Osc, fuck,"

It's all surprisingly soft with how high emotions were. "Come on, sweetheart," Oscar murmurs, hips stuttering, thumb coming down to rub tight circles on your clit.

Oscar aches all over as your eyes shut, feeling like this might be the moment he realizes he's in love. He just pushes those feelings down and fucks you harder. "Can I cum inside of you?" Oscar asks, eyes watchful and hips never stalling.

Your eyes snap wide open, and you stare at him. "What? No, Oscar." The rejection doesn't hurt him; it's the tone of your voice that makes him feel small and shameful. "Okay, sorry," he whispers and kisses your lips.

Oscar pulls out and cums over your thighs, his cheeks flushed pink in a cute way. He's biting his lip as you finish yourself off by fingering yourself. Oscar loves you a little more.

After you've both calmed down, Oscar's eyes feel hot and glassy. The words he'd been dying to say rise and fall like bile, his breath short and slightly shaky.

But you don't stare at Oscar at all.

Oscar isn't what you want. He was a pity fuck that fueled your jealousy and sick satisfaction.

And you knew you'd be hurting him, but you've blocked the guilt out.

He's not Lando and he never will be, whether that's a good or bad thing.

The call comes one night in Australia, morning in London. Oscar's voice is slightly frantic at first but he tries to calm down. You know what's coming, and you feel the pit in your stomach grow, hot flashes of guilt and nerves make your vision blur slightly.

"I-I'm- What I'm trying to say is that," Oscar takes a breath, shaky and hopeful. "I think I'm in love with you."

The silence that follows is deafening, and the longer you take to answer, the less hope Oscar has for whatever this is.

Then comes your cold reply. "Then do something about it."

The call ends and you block Oscar's number.

The last time you'd seen Oscar was two years ago, you've already disconnected yourself from the world of Formula 1. If Lando is still with that woman, you don't know nor care. Sometimes you think about Oscar, but it's very fleeting. You know that if you do, you'll never recover.

Oscar hasn't been able to go a day without thinking about you. Some days it's easier than others, but it's always you. Like clockwork, your smile or your laugh comes to his memory.

He could never hate you, even now.

He was simply your fabulous loving machine.

#[v won’t stfu]#oscar piastri angst #oscar piastri f1 #oscar piastri fanfic #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri smut #oscar piastri #[my writing!!]#finally here oh my god #im so sorry for hte long ass delay but loving machine is yours now!!!#will post on AO3 as well #loving machine

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slutforvoldy · 2 months ago

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“ YOU'RE LOSING ME. ” ( lando norris ! )

SUMMARY: the reader struggles with the painful realization that no matter how much she gives, lando will never fight for her the way she fights for him.

word count: 1.3k

warnings: angst, lando is a d!ck, gaslighting, communication issues, mentions of y/n

pairing: lando norris x female!reader

tag-list: @oscduck81

a/n: this may or may not be loosely inspired by a real life experience..........

THE ROOM WAS dimly lit, the soft blue glow of Lando’s sim racing setup casting shadows across the walls. The hum of his game filled the silence, the sharp sound of tires screeching on a digital track drowning out the soft, broken sobs escaping your lips.

You lay curled up on the bed, your back turned to him. Salty tears slipped down your cheeks, soaking into the pillow. You weren’t even sure why you were crying anymore—was it sadness? frustration? or just the aching emptiness that was growing inside you?

You knew he could hear you. He always could.

But just like every other night, he turned up the volume of his game. Hinting an unspoken message: I don’t want to hear you. I don’t want to deal with you.

And gosh, it hurts.

He always does this. He rarely talks to you despite living in the same apartment. As if there is a big wall between the two of you. As if both of you have two different worlds. His priorities had shifted, and you weren’t part of them anymore. Gaming. Racing. Nights out with friends. Work. Everything came before you. And no matter how much you tried to convince yourself otherwise, you knew deep down that he just didn’t care the way he used to.

He used to act differently when your relationship started. You missed the time when it felt like his world revolved around you, when he made you feel like you were the most important thing in his life, but now you don't know when or what went wrong. You can only wonder what happened to the man you love.

Your friends are all begging you to leave.

"Wake up, Y/N!" "You deserve better." "What else is there to hold on to?"

It started to become obvious that the things Lando has been doing have been affecting you to the point that you started seeing a therapist, desperately trying to piece yourself back together.

But the worst part is that Lando never even noticed.

You knew that this was not healthy. You knew you should leave. But things are easier said than done.

The thought of walking away—of starting over, of loving someone who wasn’t him—made your stomach twist. It felt impossible, unbearable.

Despite everything, despite the pain, you still wanted to stay. You clung to the hope that one day he would wake up and realize what he was losing. That he would see you again—as someone he once loved. Someone worth fighting for.

So you stayed. Because letting go felt harder than holding on.

It’s a big day in Abu Dhabi—the moment that will decide the 2024 Formula 1 constructors' championship. McLaren almost has an even tie with Ferrari; therefore, they desperately needed Lando to win. So you take your time to self-soothe after what happened last night.

"You just don’t understand, Y/N. Why can’t you just accept the fact that I’m a busy person?" Lando exclaimed, frustration lacing his voice.

You let out a sharp laugh, shaking your head. "Oh, I’m sorry—if bar-hopping with your friends and getting all over the media with random girls counts as 'busy,' then I must be such an idiot for not taking the hint!"

His jaw tightened. "Those pictures are from a long time ago," he muttered.

"Oh, really?" you said amusingly while scoffing.

Silence stretched between you before you finally snapped. "All I ever wanted was for you to notice me! To talk to me! Hell, to actually see me! Is that really too much to ask?"

Lando ran a hand through his hair, exhaling. "I don’t understand, Y/N. I’m giving you all the attention I can."

But it was never enough. It never felt like enough.

You sighed in defeat, your voice barely above a whisper. "I know you wouldn’t understand."

This morning, like every morning, you glared at him with storms in your eyes. But he didn’t notice—he never did. You wondered how numb he could be to not feel your grip on him slipping away. How could you love someone and not see them breaking right in front of you?

All you needed was his reassurance—that despite everything happening, despite the way he treated you, you were still the one he loved. But every time you brought it up, he twisted it around, making it seem like you were the problem. Every conversation turned into an argument instead of a solution, and with each fight, your resentment only grew.

One night, you needed him more than ever. After a brutal argument with your parents, they kicked you out, leaving you with nowhere to go. Lando was the only person you could turn to—the one person you thought you could rely on.

"I tried calling you. I rang your doorbell over and over and over again, but you never answered." Your voice wavered, frustration and hurt bleeding through. "So tell me, Lando—where were you that night?"

"I was sleeping!" he insisted, his tone defensive.

You let out a sharp, bitter laugh. "Sleeping? Really?" You shook your head in disbelief. "I literally saw the notification on your Twitch that you were live with Max!" Your voice cracked as anger and betrayal surged through you. "You left me outside your house for hours!"

Lando exhaled sharply. "Maybe it’s your fault for always expecting too much," he muttered under his breath, but you caught every word.

Your stomach twisted as you stared at him. "Excuse me?"

"Maybe..." His voice became louder. "It’s my fault for not being enough for you," he added, his voice flat.

"Or maybe it's our fault for not making this relationship work properly."

That was your breaking point.

Lando won the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix, securing McLaren’s victory in their fierce battle against Ferrari for the Constructors' Championship. You were proud—proud that your boyfriend had claimed another Grand Prix win, proud that his team had finally won. But deep down, you knew the truth: tonight, he wouldn’t be celebrating with you.

You often envied the girlfriends of other drivers—the way they rushed into their arms after a win, how they spent their victories surrounded by their girlfriends and families. But for you, it was different. You longed for that warmth.

Now, it was time to pose for the cameras, to put on a dazzling smile and make your relationship look picture-perfect—at least on the surface. In the photos, you were the devoted girlfriend, the perfect couple. But behind your fake smile, a storm raged inside you.

You had always been there for him—through his highs and lows, his victories and defeats. But when it was you who needed him, he was nowhere to be found.

And as the flashes of cameras captured the illusion of happiness, a sinking realization settled in your chest. You couldn’t keep living like this. You couldn’t keep giving all of yourself to someone who never gave anything back.

One thing was clear tonight—you were done hurting yourself for someone who wouldn’t do the same for you.

You took a taxi back to the hotel alone, your vision blurred with tears as the city lights streaked past. The moment you stepped into the room, you began packing—hands trembling, heart racing. You hadn’t planned this, but deep down, you knew it was inevitable. It wasn’t just impulsive; it was necessary.

As you zipped up your suitcase, your fingers brushed against a worn polaroid tucked between your clothes. Your favorite picture—back when love still felt easy, when he still looked at you like you were his entire world. You held it for a moment, your thumb tracing the edges, debating whether to take it with you.

But some things belonged to the past.

Flipping it over, you picked up the hotel pen and, with a heavy heart, wrote your final words.

I love you forever, Lando. I'm forever grateful. —Y/N

You placed the polaroid on the bed, letting it rest there. Then, with a deep breath, you grabbed your bags and walked to the door.

Before stepping out, you turned back for one last glance at everything you're about to leave behind. All of the memories you and Lando had, either good or bad.

Just like that, you walked out of his life, and with every step, the weight you had carried for so long finally began to lift.

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woncheolisms · 1 year ago

Text

primal. (miya osamu x reader)

word count: 2586

warnings: a/b/o dynamics, fem!omega reader, porn with minimal plot, swearing, typical omegaverse jargon (scent, heat, rut, slick, knot)

tags: @keiva1000 @kindnessspreads @msbyomimi @sleepyxxhead @priv-rose

This was getting ridiculous.

Three whole days Osamu had not spoken to you. And for what? Because of a stupid argument you had about his new menu? In your mind, if he didn't want constructive criticism, he really should not have asked you for your opinion.

(You tried to ignore the gnawing guilt you felt that maybe you had been too harsh.)

But still, was it worth being this upset about? He hadn't replied to any of your messages. His phone was going straight to voicemail, and to top it off, even Atsumu hadn't heard from him. The blond twin had told you to just give him some space, and that he was ‘going through it’. But you scoffed. What exactly was he going through? All this over a controversial menu item? You didn't know Osamu could be so unreasonable over something so stupid.

Which is why you were standing at his door now, knocking for the last ten fucking minutes, while he didn't even bother to respond or open up. Your knocking had now progressed to vicious pounding, and you didn't give a shit if the neighbours heard. You were pissed. Osamu was being a baby and not communicating with you and you would make him talk if it was the last thing you did.

“Open this fucking door, Osamu!” You shouted for the tenth time.

“Go away!” Finally. Now that Osamu had gotten tired of your incessant pounding, he had finally responded. Triumph coarsed through you.

“I knew you were in there!” One more smack on the wood. “Open up. Now!”

“I'm tellin’ ya to go away.” His voice sounded strained. Your eyebrows furrowed a bit.

“What's up with you?”

There was some shuffling, and then a pained groan. Your muscles stiffened in alarm.

“Samu?” You could feel your anger drain away, replaced by worry. “Are you okay? Open the door!”

“Just go away. Everythin’ is fine. I'm not mad at ya. I just need ya to…. get away.”

You couldn't ignore the pain in his voice anymore. You tried the doorknob again to no avail. “Please let me in. I'm getting worried.”

Silence again. You leaned against the door, your panic only building. “Samu, please.”

Your anger was non-existent now. It didn't matter to you whatever stupid fight you two had gotten into. Your paranoid mind was racing and all you could think about was a million different ways that Osamu might be hurt. If anything happened to him…

Your heart imperceptibly broke.

You had known Osamu since high school, when him and his brother would melt your brain with their unnecessary fighting and competition. He was young and naive then, with that godawful gray hair that he thankfully abandoned after high school, and an attitude so fiery it left most other people in the dust. You couldn't understand why you were so attracted to him at first glance, but then he presented as an Alpha mere months after you first met, and your attraction to him became quite clear.

More than anything else, Osamu was your close friend. He understood you in a way his twin didn't, and you liked to think you were a good friend to him too. You kept your feelings for him pretty tightly wrapped up in your heart, afraid that an Alpha like him wouldn't want you. He was desired widely by many, many omegas. And he had always turned them down. If all those prime omegas weren't good enough for him, you didn't stand a chance.

So you lived with him as your friend, because you would rather have that than nothing at all.

You knocked on the door again, more softly this time, knowing he was right on the other side. “Samu, please let me in. Let me see.”

There was a thunk. You assumed Osamu had leaned his forehead against the door. “Omega…”

It clicked in you, like gears fitting into place. Your heart raced. You shuffled closer to the door until there was no more space left. You sniffed carefully.

There was his scent, heady and musky, sandalwood and something you had come to associate only with Osamu. A scent you had loved for so long it made you want to buckle to your knees. It was strong, heavier than any time you had smelled it before. It made your eyes cross, your breath pause. Something in your core stirred.

“Your rut?” You mumbled. You knew he heard you.

Osamu groaned low in response. Your thighs clenched.

Over the years, you observed that Osamu's ruts were rare. Maybe once every three months. He would always disappear a few days beforehand, and didn't reappear until it was well over and done. Atsumu said that since his ruts were so spaced out, they would always hit really hard. So you tended to leave him alone until he reached out first, talking normally and as if nothing had happened, picking up where he left off.

In your anger and with your fight fresh in your mind, you didn't realize that Osamu had likely gone off the grid because of his rut, and not because he was ignoring you. Now you were standing here, mere inches from an Alpha in full rut, with your own core tightening and something wet slowly dripping down the crease of your thigh. Your inhibition was slowly dissipating the more you frantically tried to breathe his faint scent. Your omega purred and whined.

“I could help.” You dared say. “I could help you, Alpha.”

Another groan, low and desperate, and you felt like it was rattling through your very soul. You bit your lip hard, hand twitching to move between your thighs, but you remained frozen. Osamu didn't move away from the door. His pants grew louder, and then he whined.

“Are you sure?” His muffled voice came, almost broken with desire. He wanted- needed- you to say yes. You nodded vigorously even if he couldn't see you.

“Yes!”

Some thudding, clicking, and then he pulled open the door. Your breath caught at the sight of him.

He was gloriously shirtless, and his loose sweatpants were doing nothing to hide his problem either. His erection was obvious, straining and standing against the struggling material of his pants. It would look almost comical if you weren't horny out of your fucking mind right now. His bare torso shone with a thin layer of sweat. You bit your lip so hard you were sure you drew blood.

“Holy fuck, you smell good.” Osamu's nose, more sensitive with his rut, twitched. His eyelids fluttered, and he took in a deep breath. You stared at him some more, wondering if you were dreaming.

“What are ya standin’ there for? C’mere, Omega.”

He tugged on your arm, until your body was making contact with his. Your hands rested on his chest, and you could feel how rapidly his heart was beating. He leaned down until his face was mere inches from yours. His breath hit your lips, made them tingle. Your core clenched painfully. His scent got stronger.

“Ya sure ya want this?”

You didn’t even have the strength to nod, feeling lightheaded. You only tilted your face up until your lips brushed his. “Please.”

A breathy curse, and then he was kissing you. His arms wrapped tight around your back, like he was scared you would disappear, one hand gripping possessively over your hip. You suspected it would leave a bruise.

You wanted it to leave a bruise.

He left you breathless when your lips parted. He tugged you in further and shut the door with a loud bang, before pushing you back against it. The manhandling turned you on to no end, the thought that you were someone Osamu was about to use to satisfy himself. Your already aroused mind went wild at the notion and you arched into him when he crowded you against the door, lips meeting in a frenzy. He bit and licked your mouth raw, invading your mouth like he couldn’t bear to be apart from you. You dug your nails into his biceps, reveling in the feeling of him, of finally having him the way you wanted. Your panties were soaked through by now. Your inner thighs held the signs of your desire.

His lips traveled down your neck next, licking and biting, inhaling and exhaling as he scented you. His cock pressed into your hip and you let him satisfy his need to leave his mark on you, basking in his scent that mixed with yours and how he laid his claim on you, albeit temporarily. His hands gripped hard at your sides, pushing your shirt up to run over bare skin.

“Wanted this so bad.” He rasped, biting dangerously close to your scent gland, you leaned into the sting. “Every rut. Ya know how many times I’ve jerked off to ya?”

His accent was thick, his words slurred. You were sure he was completely gone by this point. You gripped his hair hard.

“Wanted you too, Alpha.” You whimpered back. “Touch me, god, please.”

Osamu lifted you up then, two strong hands grabbing your asscheeks and carrying you across the room to where his couch was located. You wrapped your arms around his neck, taking the opportunity to lap and nip at his neck, scenting him back. Your drenched walls fluttered around nothing, crying and weeping for a nice, thick knot to fill you up.

You had a suspicion you wouldn’t have to wait long.

When Osamu dropped you on the couch, his hands immediately tugged on your clothes, pulling off your jeans and panties in one go. The fabric clung to you with how wet it was, and the air was cool on your burning skin. You used the moment to pull off your top until you were bare before him. Osamu kissed your calf, traveling up quickly with a few kisses laid on your skin. Your thigh, your stomach, the valley of your breasts, your jaw. He had tugged his sweats down already, and you felt something hard poke at your dripping entrance.

“Can’t wait, baby.” His voice trembled. “Need ya now. Need to knot ya so bad I’m gonna explode.”

And then he was sliding into your slicked up but unprepped pussy, carving his way through your spasming walls until a sharp pain went through you. You gasped at the glorious stretch, at your walls recognising an Alpha cock and opening up to accommodate him. Your wetness ran down your ass, likely soiling Osamu’s couch but you doubted he cared. He was cursing and whining in your ear, spine bending forward at the relief of finally sinking into a wet, ready cunt. His face was flushed a deep red, sweat building on his forehead. He sank into you to the base, your toes tingling with the sensation of being so full.

“Hold on, omega.” His last words. They almost sounded like a threat. Your breath caught.

Then he was gripping your hips and holding you down, before fucking into you hard and fast. You gasped at the sudden pace, legs pushed even further open as his cock repeatedly bullied itself into you. Your jaw went slack at the sensation, how he hit you so deep, sloppy noises filling the air along with your cries and his moans. His skin slapped hard against yours, leaving the inside of your thighs red and tender. His cock hit every spot just right. You felt your toes curl.

Osamu watched your reactions, nearly delirious himself, barely holding on by a thread.

“Feel good?”

You nodded frantically, fingernails scratching over his shoulders and arms. Osamu leaned down on his elbows, tongue poking out to lick at your lips every now and then.

“Tell me how good it feels. Tell me.”

“I-” You gasped and jolted with the force of his thrusts. Tears built up in your eyes and spilled down the sides of your face. “Can’t- can’t talk.”

“Yes you can.” His hand wound into the hair at the back of your head, tugging hard until you arched into him. “Say it. Say ya love my cock.”

“Love your cock.” You managed to wail, clamping down hard on him. He cursed and leaned down further, pace not even faltering in the slightest. His lips sealed themselves against the skin of your neck and he sucked hard.

“Tell me how bad ya want my knot.”

“Want it so bad.” You parroted, losing every coherent thought and just going along with what he was saying. Osamu continued to pound into you like he wasn’t even talking, like he wasn’t rearranging your guts or turning your legs to jelly. Like the base of his cock wasn’t rapidly swelling and catching on the rim of your hole.

Osamu pushed himself deep into you before stilling completely, and you nearly weeped in frustration.

“Tell me why ya deserve my knot.” He gritted, eyes meeting yours. Little golden flecks shown in his irises, and his incisors elongated below his bottom lip. He was deep, deep in the clutches of his rut. Combined with his messed up hair and flushed cheeks, he looked wild. Uninhibited. Dangerous. Your pleasure hit its very peak, teetering just over the edge, begging for that last push. You sobbed.

“Wanted you for so long.” You gasped and cried, tears pouring from your cheeks. “Wanted you to fuck me and knot me and give me your cum. Please, Alpha, please. I’ll be so good for you.”

Osamu groaned. Something in his eyes softened. He hooked a hand under your left knee and tugged it up, folding it against your torso. His cock pulled out before pushing back in, slowly picking up his pace again. You moaned loud, feeling your pit tighten up again.

“Why don’t ya cum fer me nice and hard, baby? Get me wet with your juice and then I’ll fill you up. Promise. I’ll shove this fat knot into your tiny little cunt. Just cum fer me, little omega.”

And you did. You arched into him, eyes rolling and arms seizing as you came harder than you ever had in your life. Electricity zipped through you and all air was punched out of your lungs until you felt that your very soul was leaving your body. You didn’t even register when Osamu groaned and stuttered in his pace, or when his knot swelled until it was bullied into your thoroughly fucked out and sore pussy. White hot cum filled your insides as he locked into you, hips flush against your own.

Strong arms wrapped around your waist as Osamu’s comforting weight settled on you. He licked and lapped at your neck softly, breathing into you until you were nothing but his scent, his touches, his marks. You panted and tried to catch your breath, legs trembling with aftershocks of the event. You could barely lift your arms to run over his bare back, but you managed. Osamu hummed at your soft touch.

All was silent beneath you two as the fog of his rut lifted. You could feel him slowly cool down, get pliant against you. You could almost sense his apprehension.

“Do ya regret it?”

You smiled slightly, staring up at the ceiling. “I meant it, Samu. I’ve wanted you for so long.”

You could feel his own smile against your neck, his embrace around you tightening. “Me too.”

Your skin buzzed with warmth. While Osamu breathed softly against your neck, you let yourself drift into a quiet sleep.

#miya osamu x reader #miya osamu smut #miya osamu x you #miya osamu x y/n #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu smut #hq smut #a/b/o #a/b/o dynamics #a/b/o verse #omegaverse #alpha beta omega #alpha osamu #haikyuu a/b/o #omega reader

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bitchlessdino · 1 year ago

Note

hello! 🤍 can i request a bad boy type wonwoo having a soft spot for also a cold type reader?

like they always acting so cold towards other people and even both of them acting like they hate each other.

and people are like "oh there is no way they can date", but wonwoo is only kind to reader and viceversa even without them noticing

Oh, and they dont even realized their feelings until reader feels jealous when they saw wonwoo with someone else and thats when they realized about it, but are afraid to said something since reader doesnt know how wonwoo will react

Kinda angst maybe, but fluff at the end

take your time btw! 🤍 it is also totally okay if is not possible, hope you are having an excellent day 🌸

Pairing: wonwoox gn!reader Genre: slight angst, fluff, slice of life Word count: 6.3k tags: mentions alcohol, childhood au, biker!wonu, frienemy!wonwoo, possible love triangle, reader called a bitch, presence of violence and imminent danger, analogy using car wrecks, mc and wonwoo stilling living with their parents as adults because that's normal ok, kinda messy, intimates kisses Summary: Hard to maintain a good acquaintanceship if it started off on the wrong foot, but Wonwoo tries to do just that, no matter how much you resent him from childhood. Now reunited as adults, you're questioning whether your negative impression of him has stuck since being away or have you grown up just enough to realize how much between the two you have changed? author note: this was collecting dust but finally she is here. just in time for wonwoo to be in my bias list 🙂

Tag: @shiningstar-byulxx @misssugarlips @tommolex @hoeforhao @goblinvern @dkakapizzaboy @junhui-recs @svtup @buffhoshi @meowmeowminnie @caratochan @lovebot4han @6969lilithcat @camisun93 @emmmui @toruro @jeonride @novalpha @nvmrljk @feat-sun @tinkerbell460 @aaniag @tacosandbitch

You will never willingly be associated with Jeon Wonwoo.

His mom had just happened to be someone your mom knew. Someone that she hadn’t talked to or seen in a long time. Long enough to have built their own families and have their kids without realizing it. It was as if they fell back into place. A long-time childhood friendship that quickly rekindled in a grocery store one day. From that day on, your families were inseparable. As long as they were still friends, you’d see each other every day.

“Why would I babysit some weirdo kid? I have better things to do.”

The problem was he wanted nothing to do with you.

When you met him the first time, you were a child barely getting around to a bike without training wheels, and Wonwoo was meeting the first stages of fungal acne. He was a bit older than you were then and his mom had given him the duty to look after you, the neighbor’s kid. The neighbor’s weirdo kid.

His mom bragged to yours about how good of an older brother he was to his younger brother, Seonwoo, but that seemed that seems to be his limit. Having freshly turned a teen, it all made sense. Wonwoo didn’t know you, and all of a sudden in his growing years he’s stuck taking care of a kid he knows by association. Understandably, he’d have that teen angst.

You didn't mean to overhear. You just happened to eavesdrop behind a pillar that day in their obnoxiously nice house when you came across him and his mother talking privately. Admittedly, you hadn’t made the best impression, but you were any kid in their single digits: annoying, talkative, maybe skeptical. But you were a kid. A kid that got their feelings easily hurt.

Despite saying such hurtful words, Wonwoo listened. He treated you with care–consideration almost–following his mother's orders, but you didn't make it easy for him. Every group breakfast, every dinner, every ride to school. You became relentless. You knew how he really felt about your situation after all. Your mind was made up at that point.

If he wanted nothing to do with you, you wanted nothing to do with him.

“Keep walking.”

Your eyes barely glaze over at the unfamiliar figure before waving off your hand as if dismissing a nuisance, which in this case was accurate. The unsolicited stranger scoffs, getting up from his unwelcome seat, hacking and spitting on the spot on the floor next to your chair. “I don’t fuck with bitches anyway.”

You roll your eyes as you shoo him away with the flick of your wrist again, then feel another unwanted presence join you in your once peaceful solitude. You tightly shut your eyes in frustration before taking a deep exhale, finding silence impossible under your circumstances. “I don’t want to hear it, Jeon.”

“I wasn’t gonna say anything,” you hear Wonwoo arrogantly chuckle, shrugging off the thick leather off his shoulders and setting them on his lap as he takes a seat.

With your back turned to him, you imagine the pristinely lit smile on his face he gives when he’s amused, a rarity in these parts with the exception of you, someone he’s known long enough to recount every blemish that once appeared on your face. He watches you finish the rest of your drink, the bob of your throat shifting before you pull the glass away from your lips. Your resting bitch face is still intact after all these years.

“Good, keep it that way.”

Wonwoo could have chosen to keep the peace as he said he would, but it was just too easy with you. Even after you’ve left for college and come back, he acts as if nothing has changed. In his eyes, you were still that same angsty kid who always has something snarky to say when he’s around. And man, did he always have just as smart a rebuttal. “It’s just, that was the fifth guy you’ve scared off—course, the guy was a moron—but you like dying alone, Frosty?”

Frosty. The Snowman. Much unlike the jolly creature, however, you were given that name being somewhat of a cold character, particularly to Wonwoo and anything he witnesses face the wrath of your harsh but honest judgment.

You begin getting up from your seat, scowling at the abhorred nickname, the prediction of this dinner a mistake an accurate calculation. “Should’ve known you’d run your mouth. Tell mom I’m heading to the store across the street.”

Your mother was so proud to have you back home for a period before you’d find a new place again, and she insisted on holding a small intimate gathering at bar type restaurant. That meant sharing the space with other patrons, the Jeons, and unfortunately Wonwoo, who only grew more irritating than you last remember.

“I’ll tell her, but I’m coming with.”

The caretaker role he was bestowed upon so long ago seems to resonate with him still, insisting on trailing behind you with nonchalance. To which you answer with a brash:

“Fuck off.”

Your eyes go to the back of your skull the nth time tonight before you’re off on your stroll, noticing the annoying scrap of Wonwoo’s heel following behind you after he waves your mom and the rest of the party farewell. You ignore him, darting towards the antique shop that warms your stomach with nostalgia, hearing the wind chimes clang when you enter with a cool musk breeze to follow.

“That all you have to say to me? Even if you hate me, there has to be some…sentiment.”

You finger through the old hardcovers, eyes scanning over the aged wood of the shelves until they move on to the glossy wood of the cuckoo clocks on the walls. “Not even a little bit, Jeon.”

There’s the breathiness of his scoff that lingers in the musk air. He crosses your arms, the leather rubs loudly against itself. “Well, that’s sad to hear,” he responds, not sounding sad at all.

“Don’t you have an actual sibling to bother? Why are you being a nuisance to me?”

He simply shrugs. “Seonwoo isn’t back from his work-study just yet. Plus he’d be happy to know I kept you company.”

Unlike Wonwoo, Seonwoo was actually tolerable, pleasant even. If you were envious of Wonwoo for anything, it was having a nice little brother like Seonwoo. You weren’t exactly close but he was a nice kid, a lot nicer than Wonwoo anyway, and not at all that annoying kind of nice that chirps every two seconds.

You sigh. “Now that’s actually sad to hear.”

“I knew you’d say that. You always liked him better than me.”

Only because you never liked me in the first place.

“Mmhmm.”

“Oh my god, Wonwoo?”

A shrill voice beckons from the store entrance, an older version of a girl from your adolescence runs towards you both. “I thought I heard your gorgeous voice. Gorgeous face as well as always, how are you?”

Gina also grew up in the same neighborhood you both did and was typically nice, but around Wonwoo, she seemed to lose all train of thought since all her eyes could train on was him. She bats her eyelashes the same flirtatious way several years ago, and instinctively her body is drawn to him like mosquitos to blood, drinking in masculine appearance for all its worth.

If you were anything like her, you’d get it. Wonwoo is an attractive man by society's standards, but the truth of the matter is you can’t stand him. And you know deep down he can’t stand you. His fake politeness isn’t fooling anybody. Okay, that is a lie. His fake politeness doesn’t fool you, but his limitless charm made everyone else weak in the knees.

“Good, good.” He nods cordially, a smile drained from his face only leaving a straight stare, eyes only landing on Gina momentarily before they return to you.

Gina finds his gaze’s target before the light is slightly dimmed from her initially bright eyes. “And you too. Oh gosh, you must’ve got back too. Can you believe we’ve both graduated from college?”

You wonder if she does, considering you did graduate from the same university.

“Yeah, it’s…crazy.” You answer, sounding unintentionally sarcastic.

Gina awkwardly chuckles, eyes back on Wonwoo as if they never left. “All we need is Seonwoo and it’s like the musketeers again, huh?”

Hardly the musketeers when she only ever stalked Wonwoo the entire time. You’re surprised you didn’t find she didn’t follow him all the way to the bathroom too.

Wonwoo’s cold expression is a steel cage that lacks interest. He blindly nods, mumbling “sure,” and not giving any other sign of continuing the conversation.

“Well, you guys should totally make it to my housewarming party. I’m inviting all the other guys from the neighborhood. Invite Seonwoo too! It’ll be a nice way to catch up.”

“We’ll think about it,” Wonwoo answers, giving her another curt nod.

“I’ll be really, really grateful if you did.”

There are stars in her eyes, like a treat is dangling in front of it, that treat being a six-foot body of steel and perfect Wonwoo.

“Right,” he grunts.

She finally waves you both goodbye before making it past the glass doors with a quirk in her step.

You continue to peruse the rest of the store, picking up that one wooden statue that’s never been sold, or if it has, it keeps getting returned. It makes you wonder if it’s cursed. “Just reject her already and let her move on. Even I feel sorry for her.”

“I’m not ready for the aftermath of all that.”

You really have to unlearn that eye roll of yours. You could tell it’s giving you a headache. “Of course you aren’t.”

“You’re not going, are you? The thing she mentioned?”

“This the first time you met me? Of course, I’m not going. You are?”

He shrugs. “A party never hurt anybody.”

“Without an address?”

He pulls out his phone with a notification as clear as day, Gina’s Instagram handle ushering him with details of where the party whereabouts. “Who said I didn’t have an address?”

“She really needs to find a hobby.”

Wonwoo chuckles, tucking the phone back in his front pocket. “Ready to head back now? Unless you want to look through the store a second time.”

You groan. “Stop policing me. I’m going home.”

“I’ll take you.”

You raise your brow. “On your fucking death trap? No thanks.”

He scoffs, crossing his arms, the leather of his jacket speaking out of turn again. “You say that as if people aren’t begging to the back of my Harley.”

“Only people with a death wish.”

That goes on for some time until you make yourself walk the mile before your feet give out. Wonwoo obviously is the first with a smile on his face before he forces you to get the rest of the couple miles on the back of his bike, which was admittedly prettier in person than the photos your mom showed you.

There’s a bitter taste in your mouth as you get on—no doubt regret—questioning the proximity. “Hold on,” he says, to which you answer, “fat fucking chance.”

Your spiteful words are wasted as you find yourself tugging on him as you speed off on the vehicle from hell on the freeway.

“You’re an asshole!” You scream from your lungs.

“And I told you to hold on!” He screams back, a wide smile on his face you have no way of seeing.

You desperately wrap your arms around his torso, your life flashing before your eyes like a movie. All you hear is the wind in your ears while the traffic lights are hardly visible through your tightly shut eyes. You feel your soul leave your body, thinking nothing but the idea of an afterlife. If there was one good thing about the predicament you’re in, it’d be that he can’t see the terror in your eyes. He doesn’t know how much you want to scream bloody murder.

Before you know it, you arrive home safe and sound, the gas stopping at the curb of your house. He abruptly uses the bike break and you crash against broad shoulders, and you exude bumbling idiocy as you cling to him like a baby with separation anxiety. Oxygen finally enters your brain and you recognize your compromised position, forcing your grip off of him. You unbuckle and shove his helmet into his lap as you get off, a permanent scowl on your face.

“Fuck you.”

“Glad to see you haven’t changed, Frosty.”

You don’t forget that encounter back then and you never get a chance to with your mom finding any excuse to see the Jeons day after day since your arrival. If that perfect apartment with affordable rent were to drop at your feet at a perfect time just when you so desperately needed it, it’d be now.

“Bring that in over next door. The Jeons will be thrilled to see their fridge stocked. And remember I’ll be gone until the morning.”

“We just gave them homemade wine yesterday. Mom, just because they live next door doesn’t mean we always have to plan to meet. We see them anyway.” You grab the cumbersome container of whatever it was anyway and hold it to your side like like a football, a strained expression on your face.

“You need to understand the value of lasting relationships. That’s why you’re still single, honey.”

You roll your eyes, groaning as you trod off, not wanting to start up another one of lectures why you're in your mid-twenties room with hardly any men in your books let alone in your court. Better off facing Jeon Wonwoo again than that, you guess.

You knock on their familiar white door, awaiting an answer from the other side. Soon enough you hear a masculine voice, but a voice that isn’t quite Wonwoo’s. The boy's fresh face on the receiving end piques your interest, an expression telling of a life of light and ease. Seonwoo stares back at you with a smile before politely waving. “It’s good seeing you! Been a minute.”

You find yourself returning a gesture, relaxing your arms. “It has. Mom wanted to send things over. Again.”

“Of course. Come in.”

You leave the box of goods in their fridge, feeling the presence of the younger Jeon follow behind you like a benevolent puppy. “Did you get in yesterday?”

“This morning. Early flight.”

You grin. “Singapore doing you good, I see.”

“Nothing like home though.”

You softly chuckle, “Yeah, there isn’t.”

Your conversation is cut short with another family coming down the stairs, one that looks ready to leave. They meet your eyes in amusement and his steps begin to falter in turn. “I saw you yesterday.”

“Don’t you dare make a joke about me missing you. It wasn’t funny any of the first five times.”

He’s smug as expected, entertained by the fact you’ve kept count. “I won’t, but it won’t make it any less true.”

You scoff. “Live in reality for once in your life, Wonwoo.”

“I will when you do.” He comes to the kitchen—briefly passing by you to do so and grazing your forearm—to fill a glass of water and downs it, his signature jacket thrown over his shoulders. He let out a refreshed sigh in your direction and put it away as soon as he finished. “I’m leaving now. When you change your mind about missing me, I’ll be at Gina’s party. Might actually find some fun there while you’re at it.”

The door closes behind him dramatically and your attention is right back on Seonwoo, the successful bystander. “Your brother is annoying.”

The young man smiles, finding the nostalgia in that small event. “Reminds me of the good old times.”

“Well, I should get going.”

“You’re going to the party too?”

You shake your head. “Not the slightest bit interested. Just trying to keep myself busy while I’m still in town.”

“Plan on leaving already? You just got here.”

“I can’t live on my parents forever. Need to make a living of my own you know.”

He softly laughs, a warm light enveloping his presence. He always seems to emit pure joy. Like there was nothing that could ruin this kid's day. “Nice to see you haven’t changed. Still self-reliant.”

You can’t help but smile back, “… Wouldn't be me if I wasn’t. I'll see you later, kid.”

You walk back home and go on with the rest of your afternoon by carrying on the duties of a college graduate with no job: endless job hunting. You let yourself go on that way for an hour, already bored by rereading your applicant details and sending in copies and copies of cover letters and documents. Your eyes have started to see stars shooting from either corner, warning signs of mental fatigue.

Shaking the numbing feeling, you shut off your laptop and notice the time on the clock. In the back of your mind, you’re remembering that party Wonwoo ended up going to. These parties weren’t by any means rare, but it had been some time since you let yourself give into environments as such. You said you wouldn't go but in dire situations of weary silences, perhaps it would hurt to take a second in a new subsubspace. Something to take off the edge of the weight of your undetermined future.

Against your initial better judgment, you force yourself out of that house to enter that very party you said you wouldn't go to. So like Gina to make an event over a normal thing like this. You don’t put much thought into what you wear and leave the house and when you arrive late as you were, you are unsurprised by the huge turnout. Five seconds in, you’re already regretting the 10 bucks you paid via UBER to get there.

The house was so Gina. As expected of one of the daughters of the wealthiest families in town. As you enter, all you hear is music, loud and rambunctious voices and laughter, and shouts of barely adults chugging whatever concoction in those house party solo cups. It all quickly reminds you of college and high school, times in your life you were relieved to know were over.

Why did you decide to come again if you knew this was going to happen?

You try ignoring the voices that seem to recognize you, evading and walking through the place for a potential drink to buzz you out of self-consciousness. If you were going to be in a place like this, a drink was warranted by all means.

“Wonwoo, come on!”

Gina’s voice, easily distinguishable, resonates from the other end of the room and sees how her presence bounces like a kite in the wind. You look in the direction of her gaze to find the person she seeks, ultimately having Wonwoo being dragged by the wrist, his hair sweeping the swift breeze of her force. You were a bit relieved to see him, someone who is more similar to you in ways you’d never willingly admit.

You feel the urge to approach, curious how he’ll handle this one, but intentions all change of a brisk move, changing setting immediately. One second Gina looks up at him with doe eyes that speak longing and ache, another second her arms are looped around his neck and she pulls his lips against hers, massaging against them naturally as if rehearsed. Your feet stop, watching the unsightly scene like it’s a car crash as if in slow motion, taking you only a second to realize he hasn't yet let go.

Slowly then quickly, your chest pulls up like a marionette doll before it drops in a lump, repeating until the sound of your heart is rapidly pounding into your skull. You don’t understand it, but you don’t want to either. Swiftly, you duck back and turn your head in the other direction, having seen enough.

Then panic ensues.

People are harder to brush through than you realize. Colliding each one was like speed bumps in your way of a smooth departure. You were bound to have one person take a drunken offense to your rash movement and there it was: a subtle push that led to a spilled drink that stains the shirt of a man big enough to frighten children if he approached.

“Watch the fuckkk ya goin’!”

You don’t bother with the importance of apologizing or even acknowledging him. You realize it too late when he pulls at your collar back towards him, strangling you at the throat.

“S…stupid bitch can’t even see…fucking ruin my—hic—deink”

Your hands come around his grip, attempting to pry him off. “L-let me go. The fuck?”

“The fuck you say to me piece of shi—ah!”

He finally releases you when Wonwoo appears from behind him, tossing him out like an old ragdoll with no weight. The drunkard comes crashing down to the hardwood floor and before he realizes the cause of it, said cause whisks you away with his gril looping around your wrist.

“You’re going home right the fuck now,” Wonwoo grumbles, dragging you out of other guests' way and right out of the door, once again leading you to his motorcycle. “Bike now.”

“Wonwoo, what the fuck—“

“You aren’t an idiot. You knew what was gonna happen if I hadn’t stepped in. Now get on before fee fi fo fum finds out we left.”

“I’m not getting on that death trap again!”

His glare pierces right through you. “I know you'd rather be at home than here. Especially with the probability of becoming a statistic. Get on.”

He is right for the most part and even you’re seeing through your nonsensical defiance. Reluctantly, you follow his lead, knowing he’s left you with no other choice. You endure another near death experience, this time clutching on to him less resistantly unlike last time all the way back home. It is when you’re at the foot of your door you only realize the keys that were supposed to be in your pocket but left on the kitchen counter instead.

“Shit.”

Wonwoo quickly puts the pieces together. “No key?”

You shake your head, embarrassed slightly over your feeble appearance. “No, and mom won’t be back until the morning so I’m screwed.”

“Alright. You’re sleeping over.”

You scoff looking back at him, wondering whether he’s in the right state of mind to make that call. “You’re kidding.”

“Not unless you’re okay slumbering at the footstep of your door.”

Another choice made of your hands. You discouragingly follow after him as he unlocks the door across the street. Seonwoo was evidently still home with his loafers by the foot of the door but dead asleep upstairs in bed.

“You take my bed. I’ll take the couch,” he offers nodding in the direction of the living room.

“No thanks, I’ll take the couch.”

He groans, giving that irritated look. “Don’t be difficult and just sleep in the damn bed.”

You huff, strutting over towards the couch. “Sleep in your own damn bed, Jeon. Stop treating me like you’re my babysitter.”

He follows after you, crossing his arms like an annoyed mother, “You’re really gonna be like this?”

“I’m not being like anything.”

“You know what?” He grabs the throw pillow off the couch, “Fine. We’ll share the couch.”

“Excuse me?” Your eyes narrow back at him.

The smug smile on his face says it all, knowing there was no rebuttal to follow. “Neither of us will take the bed, we’ll both will take the couch.”

Before you can argue, he ascends the stairs for more bedding and comes back to toss you a blanket and pillow. He keeps one of each for himself, sprawling on the other end of the massive couch, gesturing you to do the exact same. Cautiously, you mirrored his image, crawling under your borrowed blanket. Despite your feet not touching, you couldn’t help but feel suffocated by the close proximity, forcing you to crunch up your legs and bring your knees close to your chest.

Wonwoo’s eyes drop in place, nuzzling into his thick blanket. “Good night.”

“Whatever.”

He softly scoffs with a smile, basking in the silence. Meanwhile, there was you, wondering why you listened to his instructions so willingly. You sigh, your eyes glued to the ceiling counting every bump and curve of its textured surface.

“This is stupid it’s literally 10 pm”

“Sounds like bedtime.”

You peek back at him, his eyes still closed. “You did not go to a party to plan on sleeping at 10 pm.”

“You don’t know what my plans are. Sleep now.”

“I could’ve handled it, you know,” you argue.

“I bet you could’ve,” he responds dryly. “Wasn’t gonna take that risk though.”

“I’m serious…you didn’t have to, especially since…”

“What?”

“You know,” you take a moment to form the words, “whatever that was with Gina.”

You hear him scoff, shifting on his side of the couch. “Nothing was happening with Gina.”

You let out a parched laugh, in disbelief of the words leaving his lips. “Wow, that lie comes so easy, does it?”

“Believe what you want. It’s not what you think anyway.”

“You’re so…obnoxious,” you sputter.

“Thank you.”

“So when did that happen? You and Gina?”

He huffs hot air out of his nose.“There’s no me and Gina. I don’t know what you saw, but…it’s nothing.”

“You were kissing.”

“You could call it that.”

“For a while,” You add.

“Just enough for her to find closure.”

“And did she?”

“Saved your ass before I could find out.”

You have no response to that and you let the silence take over for a few minutes. After those few minutes, Wonwoo was the one to break the peace.

“You asleep yet.”

“No, it’s not even 11,” you answer exasperatedly.

“Well, I'm tired.”

“Go to sleep then.”

“You should sleep before I do.”

“Why?”

He shrugs, “I'm supposed to take care of you. It’s what your mom would want.”

“Why? I'm a grown adult.”

“I don’t think an explanation is needed.”

“Ever heard of personal space?”

“Make some smart decisions and I’ll consider it.”

“You’re such a dick,” you grunt, turning away from view.

“I’m only trying to protect you.”

This shit again. You pushed yourself up from the couch to sit up, fuming in his direction. “Because your mom asked. Okay, I get it, but you’re not obligated to anymore because I’m your mom's friend’s kid. Just stop.”

“That’s not why–”

“Stop lying–”

“I’m not fucking lying,” he says matching your stance. His gaze meets yours in anguish, urging you to drop it.

You scoff, lying back down in a sleeping position with your back turned towards him. “Whatever.”

“...Despite popular belief, I’m actually concerned about you sometimes.”

“I guess…I don't entirely find that hard to believe.”

“Thank you. It’s not like I hate you.”

“Sure,” you answer, voice basted in sarcasm.

“I don’t.” You hear his body shift back down on the couch, finding comfort between the leather cushions.

“Then why are you such a dick.”

He sighs. “Sorry.”

“That’s all you have to say?”

“...Sorry.”

You ponder to yourself, wanting to turn back the clock to the earlier conversation for unknown reasons. You turn your body, seeing how his body mimics your body seconds ago, back turned, eyes closed, and facing the couch. “So if not Gina–”

“There’s no one,” he cuts off, “I mean, I'm not seeing anyone.”

It reassures you. Not that it should’ve. “Okay. I believe you.”

“Okay.”

You’re unsure when you drifted off, you only remember it being mid-conversation that your vision started to blur, followed by darkness and soon the light of the following morning. You wake up in Wonwoo’s house unexpectedly alone, quiet enough to hear the sound of a pin dropping. You enter the kitchen, parched, and you find a plate of food. You approach cautiously, catching a glimpse of the note, immediately catching on to why it was so damn empty.

Went to get stuff done. Keep yourself entertained for a bit. - Wonwoo and Seonwoo

With an impish grin, you quickly run your fork over and over into the balanced meal and nourish your body, but slow down as your subconscious reminds you of last night's events. It wanders to your impulse to attend a party out of sheer boredom, stumbling upon an unexpected scene, before immediately trying to escape it before you are caught. The kiss becomes a scene stuck on replay, playing the image like a broken record. You did not black out, though you wish you had, considering your uncalled-for badgering of Wonwoo’s relationship status you shouldn’t have cared less about. Yet do.

You try bruising it off if you can help it, quick to leave, and relieved to find your mom home to let you in. Your day begins a new, and with a new day, she already has stuff for you to do. You’d be annoyed if you weren’t so grateful to be let back in home, remembering to grab your keys this time as you left the house again following her request for grocery shopping.

You drink in the town for the first time since being back, questioning yourself why you hadn’t done it earlier. The block isn’t that different since you left, perhaps more greenery and flowers, but otherwise everything looked the same. Same old town, same old stores, the only thing difference was the people. Fine lines got deeper, toddlers now taller, and you now a stranger. Even the grocery store has changed managers, one adolescent bag boy at a time.

Even long finished with grocery shopping, you’re still wandering the center of town, circling in steps of the alternating tiles of the ground. For a moment, you free yourself from your thoughts, your worries, your ambitions, and live in the moment. It had been so long since you felt like this. You expected the feeling to emerge in college but that had been just another thing on your plate and suddenly you’re reminded of Wonwoo. Knowing him, he’d like this sight of you, proud to see you experience another emotion for a change.

Then your eyes flit back to the scene several meters from you. He reappears in your vision just as he has in your thoughts, only now Gina embracing him, squeezing the life out of him just as the life is squeezed out of your chest. He meets your eyes, his pupils expanding, before lightly pushing the poor girl off of him, but not in enough time to stop you from trying to escape again.

“Hey!”

You ignore him, letting your feet take you where it guides you. You’re blind to the incoming obstacles, brushing past pedestrians, shoulder everybody you meet, and you barely register the busy road before your feet make an unexpected halt. You hear the blaring honks until you’re pulled out, face crashing into their shoulder, arms coming around your in strong enclosure.

“Are you stupid? Why are you running into oncoming traffic?”

You shove him off, heart beating louder in your chest than any bike ride he’s taken you on has, and you’re seething in an emotion that you never expected to be in. Never in this lifetime at least. “Wonwoo just stop. Please.”

“I’m not doing anything. I don’t get why you’re trying to push me away.”

“I’m just sick of this. Of you. I can’t do this.”

“Why? Why? What do you think this is?”

“Just, leave me alone, Wonwoo.”

He sees you trying to walk out on him again and he doesn’t let you. Taking you by your arm, he pulls you towards him, leaving only the width of your forearm as his gaze pierces right through you, brimming with a mix of concern and utter anger. Frustration. Impatience.

If there was one thing about Wonwoo, he may have looked like he came from an anger management class, but he did manage it well. When he didn’t, your feet would feel glued to the concrete, frozen in the fire of his eyes, for once fearing what the man had to say.

“You know what? No. I’m not letting you do this? I don’t understand what’s going on or why you hate me so much–”

“God,” you groan, “it would be so easy if I just hated you.”

“Then what is it? You don’t hate me. You don’t like me. What? I’m wracking my brain trying to understand you–”

You don’t let him finish. You aren't sure what was in the breakfast you had today but you find yourself pulling him by the collar to meet his lips only to push him away in that instant, barely a whisper of his presence in your mouth. You clamp your hand over your mouth before finally treading away shocked by your actions, scurrying away.

He doesn’t follow you and you don’t blame him. You retrieve your once-abandoned groceries from the intersection to then find your way home. Rain is close to follow, drenching from head to toe. As if things couldn’t get any worse.

When you get home, you’re alone once again. The door shuts with a clang and you’re left in your self wallow, regret burning the back of your throat. Your back slid against the wood, a deep exhale expelling from your lungs. “So that’s what’s wrong with me.”

Like clockwork, you feel a knock erupt from the same door. Conceding to whatever was on the other side, you brush yourself up from the ground and turn the knob, only to be taken aback. Wonwoo, wet like made from glass with his locks swept over his head, stands before you panting. On either hand is a bundle of flowers barely protected in the cellophane it came with when he bought them and his cell phone he’s death gripping in his hand, no doubt damaged by the rain.

You blink back at him, lips parting in confusion. “Wonwoo…You’re wet.”

“Likewise.” He invites himself in and sets the flowers on a table nearby, not even for a second letting his gaze stray from yours. “You left me hanging there. Kiss a guy and walk away like he means nothing?”

You shake your head in disbelief, processing this, him. “Why are you here…with flowers?”

“I really do have to spell out everything for you, don’t I?” he responds smiling.

The squelch of his shoes trod in your direction, the invisible string connecting you two shortening. Preventing your evasion, you feel the palm of his hand against your back and your lips crash in a lingering reunion. The squeak of his slippery leather doesn't make it past your ears, distracted by the heat of his lips in the clash of the coolness of his rain-stained skin.

Your hand crawls up his neck to press him closer, feeling the strength of his arms wrap around you tighter before shutting the front door effortlessly with his foot. He lets you pin him against the door, lips tight bound to yours, and relief settles in his stomach as you show no sign of pulling away. He finds himself whispering a word of gratitude in every language, smiling against your lips. “No more excuses…I’m not letting anyone get in the way. Not even you.”

You finally break out in a smile, brushing it against his lips before reclaiming them, not minding the wet leather.

You spend the rest of the day in each other’s company. You put away the groceries before the room temperature worked against their favor and got yourselves changed out of your rain-dampened clothes, throwing them in the dryer. Even if he lived right next door, you allow him to wear your most oversized shirt after he insisted he should, watching the cotton fabric cling to his broad shoulders with the hem just hitting him at his hip bone.

Man, he’s a large man.

“Kinda snug.”

You scoff, crossing your arms in an attempt to hold yourself back. “You can get clothes next door. You’re just a few steps away.”

He grins, approaching you. “It’s raining…I could get sick.” His long arms land on either of your shoulders, reminding you of that cat that knew too much in a childhood cartoon. “You don’t want me sick…”

“You wouldn’t get sick taking two long strides to your house, Jeon,” you respond, rolling your eyes, unable to meet his.

“But you’d take care of me if I was, right?”

You roll your eyes, accepting his advances of a hug and feeling his chin fit in the crook of your neck. “Kiss a guy two times too many and he follows you around like a stray cat.”

He grins. “You like it. Don’t act like you don’t. You probably even like my bike and you’re not telling me.”

“Okay well, no. Those are two separate matters.”

His arms wrap around you tighter before reuniting your lips, such tenderness and sweetness in his gaze as he thumbs over the curve of your cheek. “You don’t deny that other thing.”

“I thought was already point blank. You know, when I didn’t push you away, kicking and screaming.”

“Yeah, but,” he shrugs, his cheekbones only getting higher. “Hard to come by something nice from you. I want to hear it.”

You sigh, giving in. “Fine.”

Your head fit between the divide of his chest, hearing a quickened pulse underneath it. You close your eyes as your hand strokes against his back. “I have… feelings for you. Maybe for once good feelings. Just don’t get cocky about it.”

Overwashed with calm joy, he takes you tighter, inhaling the soap in your hair. “Too late.”

#svthub #wonwoo #wonwoo angst #seventeen wonwoo #seventeen #jeon wonwoo angst #seventeen fanfic #wonwoo fluff #seventeen x reader #seventeen x you #jwon wonwoo fluff #jeon wonwoo #wonwoo fanfic #wonwoo x reader #wonwoo x you #wonwoo x y/n #jeon wonwoo x reader #jeon wonwoo x you #jeon wonwoo x y/n

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florawrites-blog · 9 months ago

Text

Mother.....- enhypen

-When the calm girlfriend finally snaps

Lee heeseung - 이희승

The evening had started like any other, with you calmly going about your routine, trying to unwind after a long day. But as you walked into the living room, the sight of the mess Heeseung had left behind—after you'd asked him countless times to clean it up—stopped you in your tracks.

The clutter was everywhere: dishes piled up on the coffee table, clothes strewn across the couch, and random items scattered on the floor. You could feel the familiar tightening in your chest, the overstimulation building up like a pressure cooker. You had always been calm, collected, the one who kept things together, but tonight, it was too much.

“Heeseung!” you called out, your voice strained as you tried to keep it together. He emerged from the bedroom, his usual carefree smile on his face, oblivious to the storm brewing in you.

“Hey, what’s up?” he asked, glancing around the room without a second thought.

That was the breaking point. All the frustration, the countless times you’d asked him to clean up, the overwhelming mess—it all came crashing down at once.

“Why is this still here?” you snapped, your voice sharp and louder than you intended. “I’ve asked you so many times to clean this up, and it’s like you don’t even care! Do you know how exhausting it is to come home to this every single day? I can’t handle this anymore!”

Heeseung stood frozen in place, eyes wide with shock. He had never seen you like this—never heard your voice raised in anger. You could see the fear and surprise in his expression, and it only made the guilt begin to creep in, but you couldn’t stop now. The words just kept pouring out.

“I try so hard to keep this place together, to make it comfortable for both of us, and you can’t even pick up after yourself? I’m so tired of having to clean up your messes, and you just…you just ignore it like it doesn’t matter!” You could feel your hands shaking, the overstimulation making everything feel too loud, too much.

Heeseung’s face softened, his usual confident demeanor faltering as he took a hesitant step toward you. “I’m sorry… I didn’t realize it was bothering you this much,” he said quietly, his voice laced with guilt. “I didn’t mean to make you feel like this.”

You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath as you tried to calm the storm inside you. The sight of him standing there, looking so vulnerable and unsure, made the anger ebb away, leaving behind only exhaustion and regret.

“I didn’t mean to yell,” you whispered, your voice breaking. “I just…I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I’m sorry, Heeseung.”

Heeseung quickly closed the distance between you, gently wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into a tight embrace. “No, I’m the one who should be sorry,” he murmured into your hair. “I’ve been careless, and I should’ve listened when you asked. I never wanted to make you feel like this.”

You leaned into his embrace, feeling the tension slowly drain from your body as his warmth surrounded you. “I just need you to help me, okay?” you said softly, your voice still trembling slightly. “I can’t do everything on my own.”

He nodded against you, his hold on you tightening. “I promise, I’ll do better. I never want to make you feel this way again.”

For a moment, you both just stood there, holding each other in the middle of the mess, the anger and frustration giving way to a quiet understanding. You knew that things wouldn’t be perfect, but at least now, he understood how much it meant to you. And that was a start.

Park jongseong - 박종성

You had always been known as the quiet one, the one who handled things with grace, never letting anything ruffle your feathers. Even Jay, who knew you better than anyone, had never seen you truly lose your temper. But today was different.

You were out with some of your high school friends, a group that had always been a little too opinionated for your taste. Jay had tagged along, more than happy to spend time with you, even if it meant being around people he didn’t know too well. The day had started off fine, but as the conversation progressed, it took a turn that you could feel brewing for a while.

One of the girls, who had always had a knack for saying the wrong things, began bringing up some old, unnecessary information about your close friend Nudsie. They were poking fun at things that were clearly uncomfortable for her, laughing at memories that should have stayed buried. Nudsie, ever the good sport, laughed along with them, but you could see the strain in her eyes, the way she was forcing herself to stay composed.

Something snapped inside you.

You could feel the anger bubbling up, a rare and unfamiliar sensation for you. Normally, you would let things slide, brush off the comments, but not today. Today, you weren’t going to let them get away with it.

“Do you ever think before you speak?” you interrupted, your voice calm but carrying an edge that made the group go silent. The girls turned to you, surprised by the sudden shift in your tone. “Because it’s really starting to seem like you don’t.”

They blinked, taken aback by the sharpness in your words. You didn’t raise your voice, didn’t cause a scene, but the intensity behind your calm demeanor was enough to make them freeze in place.

“Nudsie has been nothing but kind to all of you, and this is how you repay her? By dragging up things that should’ve been left in the past? You might think it’s funny, but it’s not. It’s hurtful, and frankly, it’s immature. If you’re so bored with your own lives that you have to dig up others’ pasts to entertain yourselves, then maybe you should focus on improving yourselves instead.”

You could see the discomfort in their faces, the way they shifted in their seats, unable to meet your gaze. The silence that followed was deafening. They had no comeback, no defense—just awkward, guilty expressions.

Jay, who had been watching the whole exchange, was surprised but also impressed. He had never seen you like this, and as much as it caught him off guard, he couldn’t help but feel a surge of pride. He hid a smirk behind his hand, knowing this wasn’t the time to show his amusement.

The girls mumbled weak apologies, clearly too shaken to continue with their usual banter. They avoided eye contact with you, their earlier bravado completely gone.

You took a deep breath, the anger slowly ebbing away as you turned your attention back to Nudsie, who looked both relieved and touched by your defense. “Are you okay?” you asked her softly, your tone completely different from the one you had just used.

She nodded, giving you a small, grateful smile. “Yeah, I’m okay. Thank you.”

You nodded back, feeling the tension in your shoulders finally ease. As you turned to Jay, you found him watching you with a mixture of admiration and pride, his eyes shining with affection.

He leaned in closer, his voice low so only you could hear. “Remind me never to get on your bad side,” he teased, his lips curling into a smile.

You rolled your eyes playfully, but couldn’t help but smile back. “It takes a lot to get me there,” you replied, your voice softening. “But some things are worth standing up for.”

Jay reached for your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I’m proud of you,” he whispered, his tone sincere.

You squeezed his hand back, feeling a sense of calm return. The moment had passed, and you were back to being your composed self, but now Jay had seen a side of you he never knew existed—a side that made him admire you even more.

Sim jaeyun -심재윤

You had a long day, running errands that seemed to drag on forever. All you wanted was to come home, relax, and get ready for the evening. You had asked Jake to do one simple thing—just one—so you wouldn’t have to worry about it when you got back: the laundry. He had agreed, of course, always the obedient and loving boyfriend, eager to help out.

But when you opened the door to the laundry room, your jaw dropped.

The entire room was filled with foam, spilling out of the washing machine and spreading across the floor. The machine itself was making a strange, gurgling noise, clearly on the brink of breaking down entirely. And in the middle of it all stood Jake, staring at the chaos with wide, dumbfounded eyes.

You just stood there for a moment, taking in the disaster before you. Your patience, which had already been worn thin by the frustrating errands you had to deal with, finally snapped. The clothes you needed to wear tonight were now soaking in a sea of foam, and the laundry room looked like a scene out of a sitcom gone horribly wrong.

“Jake!” you snapped, your voice louder than you intended, startling him out of his daze. “Be so fucking for real—what the fuck happened here?!”

Jake blinked, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to find the words to explain. “I—I don’t know, I just… I followed the instructions and—”

But before he could finish, you cut him off, the anger bubbling up and spilling over. “I better get a good explanation because this is insane! I’ve had the worst day, and now I come home to this?!”

Jake looked like a deer caught in headlights, clearly shocked by your outburst. He’d never seen you lose your temper like this. You were always so calm, so collected, but this—this was a side of you he didn’t know existed.

And it scared him.

In a desperate attempt to diffuse the situation, Jake immediately dropped to his knees, his eyes wide and pleading. “I’m sorry, mother—I mean, Y/N—I don’t even have an explanation,” he stuttered, his voice trembling slightly. “I—I must have done something wrong, I’m so sorry, please don’t be mad!”

The sight of him on his knees, so panicked and remorseful, broke through your anger just enough to make you realize how ridiculous this whole situation was. The absurdity of it all—the foam-filled room, Jake’s panicked apology—was almost too much. You felt the last bit of your rage dissipate, leaving you standing there, half-exasperated, half-amused.

You let out a heavy sigh, running a hand through your hair as you looked at him, still on his knees, clearly terrified of your reaction. “Jake, get up,” you said, your voice softening as you tried to reign in your temper. “I’m not going to kill you.”

He hesitated, glancing up at you cautiously. “Are you… are you sure?” he asked, his voice small.

You couldn’t help it—you laughed. The situation was so absurd, so unlike anything you’d ever imagined dealing with, that all you could do was laugh. “Yes, Jake, I’m sure. I’m mad, but I’m not going to kill you.”

Relieved, Jake slowly got to his feet, still looking a bit sheepish. “I’m really sorry,” he said again, his tone sincere. “I have no idea what went wrong. I must have used too much detergent or something.”

You shook your head, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips despite everything. “Yeah, that’s pretty obvious,” you replied, glancing at the foamy disaster still covering the room. “But we’ll figure it out. Just… maybe let’s avoid you doing laundry for a while, okay?”

Jake nodded quickly, his usual confidence completely replaced by a mixture of guilt and relief. “Absolutely. Never touching the washing machine again,” he promised, a nervous laugh escaping him.

You sighed again, but this time, it was more out of exhaustion than anger. “Alright, let’s clean this up before it gets any worse,” you said, rolling up your sleeves and preparing to tackle the mess.

Jake immediately jumped to help, still eager to make up for his mistake. As you both worked to clean up the foam, he couldn’t help but glance at you every now and then, still amazed by what he had just witnessed.

You caught him staring and raised an eyebrow. “What?”

He shook his head, a smirk finally breaking through his guilt. “Nothing, just… you’re kind of scary when you’re mad, you know that?”

You rolled your eyes, but couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah, well, let’s hope you don’t see that side of me too often.”

Jake grinned, leaning over to press a quick kiss to your cheek. “Deal.”

Park sunghoon - 박성훈

You and Sunghoon were on the couch, attempting to have a relaxing evening together. He had the soccer match on, and you could tell he was fully invested. But as the game went on, he started to get a little too invested. Every time his team missed a shot or the opposing team got too close to scoring, he’d smack your thigh—hard.

At first, you brushed it off. It was just his way of expressing his excitement, and you were used to his quirks. After all, you had your own—like when you would bite his biceps out of nowhere just to see his reaction. But as the minutes ticked by and the smacks got stronger, it started to wear on you.

“Sunghoon,” you mumbled, shifting away slightly. But he was feeling uncharacteristically clingy tonight, and no matter where you moved, he followed, his focus still on the game.

Another smack landed on your thigh, this one even harder than before. You winced, feeling the sting. It was starting to feel less like playful taps and more like someone had whacked you with a heated building block. You tried to stay calm, but the next hit pushed you over the edge.

“Sunghoon, I swear to god,” you snapped, your voice laced with irritation, “if you lay your fingers on me one more goddamn time, I will take every single one of your fingers, cut them off with a smile on my face, cook them, then serve them to you on a plate and feed them to you.”

Sunghoon froze, his hand halfway in the air, eyes wide in shock. He turned to look at you, completely speechless, his mouth slightly agape as he processed what you’d just said. He knew you could get feisty, but this was on another level. The intensity in your eyes made it clear that you were dead serious, and he quickly realized he had crossed a line.

For a moment, the room was silent, the sound of the game still playing in the background, but neither of you paid attention to it anymore. Sunghoon slowly lowered his hand, his pride and confidence suddenly shrinking under your fiery gaze.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, genuinely apologetic. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

You sighed, the anger slowly dissipating as you saw the look of remorse on his face. “Just… be more careful, okay? I know you get into the game, but I’m not a punching bag.”

Sunghoon nodded quickly, scooting closer to you again, but this time with more care. “I promise, no more smacking,” he said, trying to make up for it by wrapping an arm around your shoulder gently, as if you were a fragile piece of glass.

You couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at his sudden change in demeanor. “You better keep that promise, or you’re going to have to figure out how to play soccer without fingers.”

He chuckled nervously, leaning down to plant a kiss on your temple. “Deal,” he whispered, pulling you closer as he turned his attention back to the game, but this time making sure to keep his hands far away from your thighs.

Kim sunoo - 김순우

You had always admired Sunoo’s dedication to his career, his meticulous attention to every detail of his life, especially when it came to his health and appearance. But lately, his obsession with this new diet had been pushing you to the edge. He was cutting back on meals, skipping out on food that he usually enjoyed, and it was driving you crazy. You respected his choices, but this was too much.

Today, however, you’d had enough. You found him in the kitchen, making yet another bland, low-calorie meal, and something inside you snapped.

“Sunoo, we need to talk,” you said, your voice tense as you walked up to him.

He looked up, surprised by the tone in your voice. “What’s wrong?” he asked, setting down the plate he was holding.

“What’s wrong?” you echoed, your voice rising in frustration. “What’s wrong is that you’ve been on this ridiculous diet for weeks now, and it’s not healthy! You’re not eating enough, and it’s driving me insane! I can’t stand to see you do this to yourself anymore, Sunoo!”

Sunoo blinked, caught off guard by your sudden outburst. He’d never seen you this upset before, not with him. He knew you were worried, but he hadn’t realized just how much it was affecting you.

“But I’m just trying to—” he started to explain, but you cut him off, your anger bubbling over.

“No! No more excuses!” you said, your voice firm as you stood in front of him, your eyes filled with a mix of anger and concern. “This diet is not okay, Sunoo. You’re hurting yourself, and it’s breaking my heart to watch you do this. I care about you too much to let you keep going like this.”

Sunoo’s shoulders slumped, and he looked down at the floor, his usual bright energy nowhere to be seen. He felt a pang of guilt in his chest as he realized how much his actions had been affecting you. He’d been so focused on his own goals that he hadn’t considered how his behavior was impacting the people who cared about him—especially you.

He didn’t know what to say, so he just stood there, pouting slightly, his gaze fixed on the ground. The silence stretched between you, heavy and uncomfortable.

You took a deep breath, trying to calm down, but your heart was still pounding in your chest. “Sunoo, I love you,” you said, your voice softer now. “But this has to stop. You’re perfect the way you are, and you don’t need to do this to yourself. Please, promise me you’ll stop this diet.”

Sunoo looked up at you, his eyes filled with a mix of guilt and remorse. He knew you were right, and he hated seeing you this upset. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice barely audible. “I didn’t mean to make you worry.”

“Then promise me,” you insisted, your tone gentle but firm. “Promise me you’ll stop.”

Sunoo nodded slowly, the weight of his promise settling heavily on his shoulders. “I promise,” he said quietly, finally meeting your gaze. “I’ll stop.”

You let out a sigh of relief, feeling the tension slowly drain from your body. You stepped forward, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug. “Thank you,” you whispered against his shoulder. “I just want you to be healthy and happy.”

Sunoo hugged you back, holding you close. “I will be,” he murmured, more to himself than to you. He knew he had a lot to work on, but with you by his side, he knew he could do it.

Yang jungwon - 양중원

You loved Jungwon more than anything. He was kind, thoughtful, and always knew how to make you smile. But there was one thing that drove you absolutely insane—his obsession with mukbang videos. It wasn’t just a casual interest; he would play them at any given moment, whether you were eating, cuddling, or just trying to relax. Normally, you’d let it slide because, well, it made him happy. But tonight was different. You were PMSing, already feeling irritable and craving a bit of comfort, but instead of the soothing presence of your boyfriend, you were greeted with the obnoxious sound of someone slurping noodles on full blast.

As you entered the living room, there he was—your big dork of a boyfriend, sitting in front of the TV with a plate of food in front of him, grinning ear to ear as the mukbang video played. The sound of exaggerated chewing and slurping filled the room, making your skin crawl. You tried to push through it, telling yourself that it wasn’t a big deal, but the longer it went on, the more unbearable it became. The misophonia you suffered from flared up, and every sound felt like a personal attack on your sanity.

“Jungwon,” you called out, trying to keep your voice steady, but the irritation was evident.

He didn’t seem to notice your tone, too engrossed in the video. “Yeah?” he replied, not even turning to look at you, his eyes glued to the screen.

That was it. The last straw. You couldn’t take it anymore. “Jungwon, I swear to God, if you don’t stop that stupid video right now, I might as well unplug the TV, kick you out, and throw the TV out with you!”

Jungwon’s eyes widened in shock as he finally turned to face you, his expression dumbfounded. He’d never heard you this angry before, especially not over something as seemingly harmless as a video. But seeing the genuine frustration in your eyes, he immediately realized how serious you were.

“I—I’m sorry,” he stammered, quickly grabbing the remote and pausing the video. The room fell into blessed silence, and he looked at you with wide, apologetic eyes. “I didn’t know it was bothering you that much.”

You let out a long breath, the tension in your shoulders slowly easing now that the noise was gone. “It’s just… I can’t deal with it right now, especially tonight. I need a little sympathy, not more noise.”

Jungwon’s expression softened, and he immediately moved to sit beside you on the couch. “I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you,” he said, gently pulling you into his arms. “Here, you can have my food. I’ll turn off the TV, and we can just relax together.”

You looked up at him, your irritation fading as you saw the concern in his eyes. He really hadn’t meant any harm, and now that you’d gotten your frustration out, you couldn’t help but feel a little guilty for snapping at him. But Jungwon wasn’t upset; if anything, he looked relieved that he could make it right.

“Thank you,” you mumbled, accepting his offer and taking a bite of his food. It tasted even better knowing he cared enough to listen to you.

Jungwon smiled softly, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “Anything for you,” he said, planting a soft kiss on your forehead. And with that, he settled beside you, the two of you finding comfort in each other’s presence, with no mukbang videos in sight.

Ni- ki -남편

You and Ni-ki had just returned home from what felt like the longest, most exhausting day ever. Every part of your body ached, and all you wanted to do was collapse into bed and drift off to sleep. Ni-ki, however, had other plans. Despite having gone through the same grueling day as you, he seemed completely unfazed as he immediately made a beeline for his PlayStation. It was his go-to stress relief, and as much as you loved him, you couldn’t understand how he had the energy to play after a day like this.

You tried to ignore it, convincing yourself that you could sleep through the sounds of his game. But as soon as you started drifting off, the loud, agitating sound of the PlayStation starting up filled the room, followed by the unmistakable noise of gunfire and explosions. You groaned, turning over in bed and pulling the blanket over your head.

But then came the worst part—Ni-ki’s screams. Each time he lost, he let out these deep, guttural growls that seemed to shake the room. His voice, usually comforting, was now the most irritating sound in the world. You pressed a pillow over your head, trying to block out the noise, but it was no use. The sounds seeped through, and your patience was wearing thin.

“Niki, scream one more time. I dare you,” you muttered, your voice muffled by the pillow but still laced with irritation.

He thought you were joking, so he let out another loud yell when he lost the next round. That was it. You sat up, grabbed the nearest pillow, and threw it directly at his head. It hit him squarely, and he turned around, eyes wide in surprise, as he pulled off his headset.

“If I even hear you breathe right now, Ni-ki,” you snapped, your voice low and deadly serious, “I will dig my hands so deep in your throat and snatch your voice box out. Let’s see how you’ll be able to scream again at 3 a.m. in the morning. Ni-ki, don’t test me.”

Ni-ki’s eyes widened even more, and for a moment, he was completely speechless. He’d never seen you this upset before, and it shocked him to his core. He quickly realized you were not in the mood for jokes or more noise.

“Okay, okay! I’m sorry, I’ll stop,” he mumbled, quickly turning off the PlayStation and sitting down quietly beside you, looking at you like a scolded puppy.

You let out a heavy sigh, the anger slowly ebbing away now that the room was finally quiet. “Thank you,” you muttered, lying back down and pulling the covers over yourself again.

Ni-ki slid under the covers beside you, cautiously wrapping an arm around your waist. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to annoy you,” he whispered, pressing a soft kiss to your shoulder. “I’ll make it up to you tomorrow, I promise.”

You softened at his words, and though you were still a bit frustrated, you appreciated his apology. “Just… no more games this late, okay? I really need to sleep.”

“I promise,” he repeated, holding you close as you finally started to relax. The two of you drifted off to sleep, with no more interruptions, and the only sound left in the room was the quiet, steady rhythm of Ni-ki’s breathing as he cuddled up to you.

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11cupids-tarot11 · 1 year ago

Text

A letter from your future self.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

1 -> 3

DM me for private readings

$5.55 per question!

C@sh app and PayPal payments only!

Tips appreciated

Cash tag- $minnieplant3

Love y'all!

- Cupid 𖥔 ࣪ ᥫ᭡ꗃ⋆࣪.

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

Pile 1- The star, Two of wands, The devil.

"I think it's time you and I have a talk, I know you know who I'm talking to, yeah I'm talking to myself, but it's not just you and me here, what about little us? Past us? The most important form of ourselves? You haven't been listening to all of us, why? Why do you ignore the child in you who screams to be listened to, to be understood, who just wants to heal like the rest of you. I promise you it's not silly at all to be in tuned with your inner child, I promise you no one's going to hurt you or make you want to hide away again, they can't control your emotions. They only want you to feel so powerless against them, like you're helplessly chained to them, but you have the power to break the chain and run free again, wild. You deserve to follow your dreams, do whatever you want, whatever it is that's been bugging you like a fly in your ear, a project that's always on the back of your mind, the one that just wouldn't go away since you were a child, you can do it, I know you can because I'm already here as proof, but I can't spoil too much. Be creative, shine brightly and never let anyone dim that light. I love you with all my might! ;)

- Me"

Don't forget the poll below!

⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

Pile 2- The devil in reverse, Three of wands, Justice.

"Hi buttercup! I hope all is well these days, I've been thinking about you so much these days, well let me explain, I've been thinking about how hard we've worked, how far we've come and what we had to do to be here. I know, it's a lot. I'll often look back a lot and think about how unfair things were, how many people were never on your side, how many battles you've had to win on your own and how many you've had to lose. I'll never forget the day we decided we had had enough of our problems, our addictions, the toxicity and just did something about it, we cut that toxic person off, quit that stupid job or finally changed that damn schedule of yours and did something better for your health. Whatever it was we did it <3 and it paid off so much, I'm so happy we did because it led us to better days, so much abundance, everything we've always deserved. We got the justice we've always been searching for in such a cruel world and I'm so proud of us for doing that baby girl! We never gave up, no matter how much we wanted to, how much we wanted to go back to that same place because it was comfortable and we just got so blind sided we never knew we could do so much more if we just put our mind to it! Go us! Go me! Go you!

Love- The version of yourself you were always meant to be 🩷"

Don't forget the poll below! Love you!

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖.

Pile 3- Six of coins, Ace of wands in reverse, Two of coins in reverse.

"Psst! Remember that project you weren't so sure about? You know the one, well I have a message for you! If you get started with it now I bet you a million bucks you could never guess where you'll be ten years from now. You remember that big house you've always wanted? All of the wealth you've always wanted to share and give back to others? We finally can! We did it! It was always important to give back to the ones we love, to be able to support and live comfortably and we finally did it. Just try not to get too big headed, okay? Remember who you are, where you come from and why you started this in the first place. Don't forget about your loved ones, the ones who supported you through thick and thin. I know your schedule might be busier, just don't forget to find that balance. We're at a very important time in our lives right now, I understand this, but remember to take a break from that damn schedule of yours. Take time for us, okay? I want you to call off as soon as you see a single sign of distress and go to the spa, I promise you're going to need it! ;) "

-Big boss lady (this pile was channeling feminine energy, someone who's in charge of their own business and gives orders to others. Very important business woman vibes here.)

Don't forget to do the poll at the bottom! Love you!

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

#18+ tarot #pac love reading #pac tarot #pick a card #spirituality #tarot cards #tarot #tarot reading #tarot love reading #tarot messages

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rootedinrevisions · 6 months ago

Text

Not Just Some Option

SUMMARY: After years of friendship and hidden feelings, you and Tyler Owens, the charming and fearless storm chaser, find yourselves tangled in an unspoken connection. One quiet evening at home in Arkansas, the walls of denial crumble as the tension between you finally comes to a head. Tyler’s frustration with your reluctance to open up sparks a raw, emotional confession, forcing both of you to confront the depth of your feelings. As truths are laid bare, Tyler proves his devotion with words and actions, leaving no room for doubt that his heart belongs to you—and only you.

A/N: Thanks to the Anon who sent the request for this in! Hope you enjoy it!

PROMPT: "What part of I want you and only you do you not understand?"

WARNINGS/TAGS: Some Angst. Fluff. Some brief kissing/making out.

WORD COUNT: 2k

TAG LIST: SEE COMMENTS

If you would like to be added to any of my Tag Lists please feel free to comment, send an ask, or send a DM and I'll be happy to get you added!

You’d always been good at hiding your feelings for Tyler. After all, what choice did you have? Loving him quietly from a distance was safer than risking everything and losing him for good. You told yourself you were fine being his best friend, the one he could count on through thick and thin, the person who knew him better than anyone. But sometimes, like tonight, the weight of unspoken words felt like it might crush you.

His arm was draped over the back of the couch, and you leaned into him, trying to focus on the movie playing on the screen. The warmth of his body so close to yours should have been comforting, but it only reminded you of all the times you’d wished for more.

And then his phone buzzed. Again.

You bit your lip, refusing to look at the screen. It wasn’t your business who he was texting, no matter how much it felt like a dagger twisting in your chest. You tried to ignore the flashes of girls’ names, the way his lips quirked up in a small smile when he typed out a reply. But when the fifth buzz shattered the silence, you couldn’t help the sharp glance you shot at his phone.

“Who is that?” you asked, keeping your tone light, though the words tasted bitter in your mouth.

Tyler barely looked up. “Oh, just that brunette from Kansas. You know, the one from the bar.”

The knot in your stomach tightened. You remembered her well. The way she’d draped herself over him, batting her eyelashes and whispering in his ear, like she owned the right to his attention. And the worst part? He’d let her.

“Right,” you said, your voice tight as you turned back to the TV.

Tyler frowned, his focus shifting from his phone to you. “Hey, you okay?”

“I'm fine,” you lied, your eyes glued to the screen.

“You don’t sound fine.”

“I said I’m fine, Tyler.”

You could feel his gaze on you, sharp and searching. “Come on. Talk to me. What’s going on?”

“It’s nothing,” you said quickly, your fingers clenching the edge of the throw pillow in your lap.

He sighed, his tone turning frustrated. “Why do you always do this? I know something’s bothering you, but you won’t tell me. Why can’t you just be honest with me?”

Because if I tell you, I’ll lose you. The words screamed in your head, but you couldn’t say them. What if he didn’t feel the same? What if your confession made things awkward, and ruined the easy friendship you’d spent years building? You swallowed hard, your throat tight with unshed tears.

“Forget it, Tyler,” you said softly. “It’s not important.”

“Bull,” he shot back, his voice firm. “It’s important if it’s upsetting you. Talk to me.”

The frustration in his voice broke something in you, and before you could stop yourself, the words spilled out. “I don’t like watching you with other girls, okay? I don’t like it when you’re texting them or taking them home. It hurts, Tyler. It kills me.”

The room went silent, the only sound the hum of the TV in the background. Tyler stared at you, his eyes wide with surprise.

“You…” He hesitated, his voice quieter now. “You feel that way about me?”

You nodded, unable to meet his gaze. “I’ve been in love with you for years, Tyler. But I know it doesn’t matter."

"It does matter. I want you." He said softly.

You scoffed, rolling your eyes. "You could have anyone you want. Why would you want me?”

The vulnerability in your voice must have hit him, because he reached for you, his hand gently tilting your chin up until your eyes met his.

“What part of ‘I want you, and only you’ do you not understand?” he said, his voice low and intense.

You blinked, the words not fully sinking in. “Tyler, don’t—”

“I mean it,” he interrupted, his eyes boring into yours. “I’ve wanted you for so long, but I didn’t think you felt the same. And yeah, I’ve been an idiot talking to other people, but that’s over. I’m done with anyone else. I just want you.”

You shook your head slightly, tears spilling down your cheeks. “How can I believe that? After everything? I've seen you take I don't even know how many girls back to your hotel room.”

His hand slid from your chin to the back of your neck, his thumb brushing soothing circles against your skin.

“Then let me prove it to you,” he murmured, his voice dropping as he leaned in closer.

Before you could respond, his lips were on yours, soft but insistent, and the world fell away. It wasn’t rushed or tentative—it was a kiss full of everything he couldn’t put into words, everything he’d been holding back.

When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, and his breath was warm against your skin. “Do you believe me now?”

You nodded your voice barely a whisper. “Yeah. I believe you.”

“Good,” he said with a small smile, his hand still cradling the back of your neck. “Because I’m not letting you go.”

Tyler didn’t wait for your response. His lips found yours again, firmer this time, more insistent. The hand cradling the back of your neck tightened slightly, anchoring you to him as his other hand moved to your waist, pulling you closer.

The kiss deepened, his tongue brushing against your lips in a silent request, and when you parted them, a quiet gasp escaped you as he claimed the moment. His tongue swept into your mouth, exploring, tasting, and igniting sparks that spread through your body like wildfire.

Your hands, which had been resting awkwardly at your sides, moved on instinct. One slid up to his shoulder, gripping the soft fabric of his t-shirt, while the other tangled in the hair at the nape of his neck. The soft strands felt warm under your fingertips, and you couldn’t stop yourself from giving a gentle tug, earning a low, almost guttural sound from him that sent a shiver down your spine.

He shifted, his body pressing closer to yours as the kiss turned more heated. You felt his fingers flex against your waist, holding you firmly but not harshly. The way he touched you was deliberate like he was savoring every second, every tiny reaction you gave him.

“God,” Tyler murmured against your lips, his voice hoarse and breathless. “I’ve wanted to do this for so long.”

His confession hit you harder than you expected, making your chest tighten and your head spin. You barely had time to process it before he kissed you again, tilting his head to deepen the connection.

You melted into him, letting go of the doubts and fears that had held you back for so long. The warmth of his touch, the intensity of his kiss—it all felt so right, so natural.

Tyler’s hand slid up your side, his thumb brushing just under the edge of your ribs before it settled lightly on your cheek, guiding your face to stay perfectly aligned with his. The tenderness of the gesture contrasted with the hunger in the kiss, and it left you breathless, craving more.

When you finally broke apart, both of you were gasping for air. Tyler pressed his forehead to yours, his breath mingling with yours in the charged silence. His hands framed your face, his thumbs tracing soothing patterns along your jaw.

“I meant what I said,” he murmured, his voice a low rumble that sent a thrill through you. “I want you. Only you.”

Your heart stuttered at the sincerity in his tone, and all you could do was nod, your fingers still gripping his shirt as though letting go would break the spell.

“I don’t want this to be just a moment,” you whispered, your voice shaky but resolute. “I don’t want to go back to pretending.”

“We won’t,” Tyler promised, leaning in to press a softer, slower kiss to your lips. “No more pretending. Promise.”

Tyler’s promise hung in the air between you, heavy with meaning. You felt the truth of it in the way his hands lingered on your face, in the way his gaze bore into yours like he was trying to memorize every detail.

He kissed you again, slower this time, his lips moving against yours with a tenderness that made your chest ache. It wasn’t just passion; it was something deeper, something that made the world outside this moment fade away.

You sighed against his mouth, your body relaxing into his as you let yourself get lost in him. Tyler responded by pulling you closer, his arm wrapping around your waist as he shifted, guiding you backward until you were lying against the cushions of the couch. He leaned over you, his weight balanced carefully on one arm as his other hand caressed your cheek, his thumb brushing lightly over your skin.

His kisses trailed away from your mouth, moving to the corner of your lips, then along your jaw. Each touch of his lips sent a spark racing through you, and when he nuzzled against the curve of your neck, you couldn’t stop the soft gasp that escaped you.

“Tyler,” you whispered, your voice barely audible over the sound of your heartbeat pounding in your ears.

He hummed in response, the low, rough sound vibrating against your skin as his lips found the spot just below your ear.

“I love the way you say my name,” he murmured, his breath warm and tantalizing against your neck.

You bit your lip, your hands sliding from his shoulders to his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your palm. It grounded you, reminding you that this was real—that this wasn’t some fleeting dream you’d wake up from.

Tyler pulled back slightly, his eyes searching yours, his expression softer now, almost hesitant.

“I need you to tell me something,” he said, his voice quiet but firm.

You nodded, your fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt as you held his gaze. “Anything.”

“Do you trust me?” he asked, his brow furrowed as though the answer truly mattered more than anything else.

The question caught you off guard, but the answer came easily. “Of course I do.”

“Then trust me when I say this,” Tyler continued his voice steady but laced with an intensity that sent shivers down your spine. “I’m not going anywhere. This doesn't ruin our friendship. You’re not just some option to me. You never were.”

His words hit you like a tidal wave, and tears pricked at the corners of your eyes before you could stop them. You’d spent so long doubting, second-guessing, convincing yourself that this connection between you was one-sided. But now, hearing him say it, seeing the conviction in his eyes—it was overwhelming.

“Tyler...” Your voice broke, and you swallowed hard, trying to keep your emotions in check.

He smiled softly, his thumb brushing away the tear that slipped down your cheek. “No more doubting, okay? No more wondering if you’re enough. You’ve always been enough. For me, you’re everything.”

Your breath hitched, and before you could say anything else, Tyler leaned in, capturing your lips in another kiss. This one was slow and deliberate, as if he was trying to prove his words with every movement, every gentle caress.

The heat between you began to build again, his kisses growing more fervent as his hand slid down your side, resting just above your hip. You felt his fingers curl slightly, holding you with a mix of reverence and restraint.

The sound of the rain tapping against the window faded into the background as the world narrowed to just the two of you. Nothing else mattered—not the doubts, not the fears, not the years you’d spent hiding how you felt.

In this moment, it was just you and Tyler.

And for the first time, it felt like you were exactly where you were meant to be.

#Tyler Owens #Tyler Owens x reader #Tyler Owens x you #Tyler Owens Fic #Tyler Owens Fanfic #Tyler Owens Fanfiction

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sttoru · 2 years ago

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♯ 𝐔𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐘 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐊.

⟣ sypnosis. kento has been extremely busy lately, going on business trips and so forth. he decides to surprise you by coming back earlier than expected. that’s how you end up finding your lover on top of you, showering you in his affection at 3 in the morning.

⟣ tags. nanami kento x female reader. fluff, bit of angst, suggestive towards the end. reader gets called 'sweetheart, angel, dear' wc: 1.8k

⟣ note. okayokay finally an adition to my event heheh ive almost forgotten about it but then i saw this prompt & was like . ok nanami , i must write this rnnn no delaying anymore so here i am :3 its also very bad. i hate it sm LOL i hope u at least like it t_t

kento often asks himself why he had returned to the world he despised — the jujutsu society; his old high school. the sprawling curses everywhere are the main cause of his current misery.

he had been sent out on missions left and right, not catching a break in hopes of reducing any more civilian causalities than necessary. kento had even thought that maybe his previous 9-5 job wasn’t as bad as he had considered it.

overtime was every day for the sorcerer now. that wasn’t the worst thing - no - the fact that he was pratically living a long distant relationship with his beloved irritated him most.

a thought he had in his high school days reoccured in a moment of distress: ‘why not leave all those missions to gojo?’

you were still pretty understanding of his situation. kento appreciated that, though the guilt still ate away at him whenever he tried to sleep. an empty bed welcomed him each time he re-entered his hotel room — you saw the exact same scenery when returning home to your shared apartment.

both of you were adults; both knowing that life was unfair. the two of you being unable to see each other from time to time was a part of your life. kento and you still maintained a healthy relationship. that was all that really mattered in the end.

11:49PM. . . tonight wasn’t unlike any other night; you were preparing yourself to go to bed—changing into your pyjamas after showering, snuggling to a pillow under the covers and texting your lover one last message.

‘good luck on your mission as always! stay safe, i love you.’

you stare at your phone screen for a minute longer than intended. even if you tried to be mature about it — you longed for kento’s warmth and undivided attention. you want him with you, his strong arms holding you to his chest as you rest, his deep voice sending shivers down your spine in the best way possible.

you sigh defeatedly and put your phone down on your nightstand. just two days until you could see your partner again. you can hold onto that hope to keep you calm.

despite you trying to stay positive, you tossed and turned in your bed as you thought about kento’s safety. there was always a chance of him not coming home to you — always the possibility of that bed to be empty for the rest of your life.

all you could do was pray for his safety in your head whilst your eyes eventually closed from fatigue, your mind drifting off to a deep slumber.

03:14AM. . . kento opens the door he had wished to have opened way earlier. the door that lead to the place where his heart lays; the person who claimed his heart and soul for eternity. you.

he didn’t think he’d actually do it. kento had originally planned to finish his last job as soon as possible and then get home afterwards, but there seemed to be a change in routine.

the special grade sorcerer simply assigned the mission to ino — the person whom he could trust most to finish the job in one piece. as much as kento dislikes to put his juniors in possible risky situations, there are also situations where it’s fine to depend on them. besides, the mission could easily be done by a grade one sorcerer.

kento sighs. the familiar scent of your home was one he could recognise from miles away. one that could calm his nerves instantly. it was that same distinctive scent you carry; thus why your lover sometimes calls you his home.

‘i can’t wait to be home’ ‘i want to be home’ ‘i’m going home’ — all these sentences, which kento has uttered before in earlier conversations, weren’t referring to a place. rather to a person he held dear.

“oh, my sweetheart.” the blonde man whispers under his breath as his eyes catch the shape of your figure under the blankets. he quietly enters the master bedroom and closes the door behind him, not making a sound as to not interrupt your well-deserved sleep.

kento slowly undoes his dotted tie, along with the upper buttons of his blouse. he probably needs to go take a good shower before he could settle down with you — but that’d risk waking you up.

you look extremely angelic in his eyes. especially with your left cheek squished by the soft pillow your head rests on. you never once fail to convince him that you are indeed the woman of his dreams; the woman kento ever had and will have eyes for. it’s like you get more attractive to him as the days go on.

“mh,” your sudden and soft groan makes him realise just how disturbing his behaviour could be interpreted as. kento’s body was hovering over your sleeping one and he was just. . . staring at you with a soft smile. a smile which he didn’t even notice had permanently found its place on his weary face.

kento sits down on the edge of the mattress, callused hand gently tucking you in properly, putting the blanket over your shoulders to make sure you didn’t get cold. he can’t rest if you’re not comfortable— even if he himself was exhausted to the point his eyes were starting to feel heavy.

yet that exhaustion doesn’t last long. it never does when kento’s able to see you again after a tiring week of countless missions and other jobs. your presence alone grants him the energy to stay awake and take care of you. and himself. you’re the reason he keeps it going.

“i love you so much, my beautiful girl — my angel.”

kento sure was a romantic. even when you’re unaware and asleep.

he couldn’t help it; the feeling stirring inside of him. the feeling of adoration and love for you. you are simply resting, yet kento felt an urge to kiss you all over, show you the unending love he has for you. but. . that’d probably be disturbing your peace. you are sleeping after all. he

not that that would stop kento.

your eyes flutter open due to a sudden presence hovering over you. your entire face and neck area was feeling ticklish, like someone was placing tens of kisses all over the skin.

strands of blonde hair is the first thing showing up in your blurry vision. kento’s face follows afterwards as his head tilts back up, the warmth against your jawline disappearing along with it —

“ah, i’m sorry.” a low and almost guilty chuckle tumbles out of his sore throat. the visible confusion on your face makes him let out another, “shh, shh, it’s just me, sweetheart.”

your arms flew around kento’s torso the second the realisation dawns upon you. your heart went from a slow pace to one that caused your entire body to warm up immediately; the adorable reaction and increase in heart rate not going unnoticed by your lover.

you wordlessly hug him — almost still in shock by the sudden appearance. kento doesn’t fight off your tight embrace, instead, welcomes it with open arms. the delicate kisses on your skin continue, each being placed with precision whilst one of his hands keeps your head tilted a little — rough fingers being a contrast of the gentle grip they had on your jaw.

“i missed you lots,” kento murmurs, eyes closed as he basks in the warmth of your body, his lips refusing to let go of your neck, “i couldn’t wait anymore. i couldn’t be separated from you any longer or i’d lose it.”

his gruff voice sounded even deeper than it usually would. maybe due to the overuse of it during his missions. the lone thought makes you pout — the thought of kento working super hard just to provide for you both.

“i missed you more, love.” you mumble, bottom lip trembling a little as kento’s hug triggers a whole lot of emotions in you. his hugs were special, his muscular arms giving you a sense of comfort you couldn’t find anywhere. no one could hug you like he did, “you did well. you did so well.”

those were all the words kento needed. his lips come to halt right above your collarbone, his breath a bit heavy from how much he's holding himself back from doing more. one hand moves from your cheek to your waist, fingers toying with the fabric of your shirt.

“thank you, dear.” kento says. his words carrying a load of unending affection. your simple words of appreciation and encouragement makes him shiver in delight. this is what he longed for; this is what he did it all for.

it was clear. the answer to his question - of why he had returned to the jujutsu world, to become a teacher at his former high school - it was all for you. to be able to be with you, see you and hold you like this. to have someone like you appreciate all of his efforts.

“may i?” kento asks through a quiet whisper as he gently removes the blanket covering your figure, his eyes darting down towards your cleavage. he's asking for permission to cross that barrier — to cover you in the love you deserve.

you just stare at the blonde man above you for a second. you watch as he climbs onto the bed with you; the bed which was once empty and dull, now suddenly becoming your favourite place to be at. your fingertips graze against kento's sharp cheekbones. a habit you always did when you were appreciating his looks.

“go right ahead.” you answer with a confirming nod.

both of you were touch starved and had been deprived from each other's embrace for way too long. now was the perfect time to make up for all the time lost.

kento wasn’t going to let the opportunity slip past him. he smiles at you, a gentle and handsome smile, whilst a few of his blonde locks fall over his left eye — his hands already prying away the blanket covering your shape. it was time to show you just how much he has longed for you.

“hold on to me, sweetheart. i’m not stopping until you realise just how much i’ve missed all of you.”

#sttoru writes.#jjk x reader #jjk fluff #nanami x reader #jjk x y/n #jjk x you #nanami kento x reader #nanami x y/n #nanami x you #jjk fic #jjk fanfic

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lovelynim · 4 months ago

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Fanfiction

Zenless Zone Zero - Asaba Harumasa (feat. Reader x Harumasa)

A/N: I don't even know where I start to explain the idea behind this one. Well, fanfics are canon in ZZZ and Harumasa is aware his fans write fics for him so... yeah.

Summary: Harumasa is reading a fanfic at work.

Word count: 1844 words

Harumasa sighed, slouching in his chair while the report pages rested empty on top of his desk. There was still about two hours before he could finally clock out and his body simply refused to waste its energy on filling those insufferable documents.

He already had to risk his life fighting ethereals, exploring hollows and doing medical check-ups, why did he also have to worry about explaining how any of those went? Why did it even matter in the first place? They just happened, weren’t the higher ups glad enough that he saved the day?

“Asaba-kun,” a cold, firm female voice came from behind him, making Harumasa jump in his seat and sit back up straight, dragging him from his thoughts back to reality. “Are you making progress with your reports? It would be troublesome to request another deadline extension after a two month delay.”

“D-deputy chief, you scared me!” Harumasa whined softly, his hand pressing flat against his chest while he looked up to Yanagi with puppy-like eyes. “Of course I’m making progress, but it’s just so har-”

“Good,” Yanagi nodded with a smile, giving him a gentle pat on the shoulder, “I’m sure you can make it up for all the reports behind the schedule, Asaba-kun,” she added before walking away to pay some mind to whatever matter was going on with Soukaku and Miyabi.

‘So mean!’, Harumasa thought, how could the deputy chief of all people not even bother to offer him some help with that endless pile of work? He frowned, resting an elbow on top of his desk and his head on top of his hand. Well, there were still two hours, right? He could kill off some time and do that report later…

He reached for his cellphone, which was just by the side of the pile of work he was trying so hard to ignore, and mindlessly moved his thumb around the screen, drawing an arrow and unlocking the device.

Browsing through the interknot shouldn’t be that much of a big deal to most people, but things may get a little interesting when you have an army of restless fans that are chronically online, to say the least. It was still a little hard for him to believe what kind of thing his admirers would do and create: drawings, banners, edits of his fights’ footage with upbeat songs, and even fictional stories… Now that he thought about it, Harumasa was probably the one inside the Section 6 that paid the most attention to these contents: Yanagi usually brushed them off with a polite smile, not even daring to give them a second look; Miyabi didn’t understand the concept behind people’s admiration towards her; and Soukaku only cared about the gifts she could eat.

Still, while being popular could be a little troublesome at times (like when he was trying to sneak out with a certain proxy), having a legion of followers would come handy at boring moments like this. After all, Harumasa knew there would always be something to entertain himself with.

“Masa-masa enthusiasts explain why he is so cute; Check it out!”, “Ten things you didn’t know about Asaba Harumasa!”, “Harumasa caught secret dating?!”, “Harumasa spotted at the Lumina Square! See more pictures here”...

Harumasa rolled his eyes, scrolling past all the posts he deemed dumb. Why was the tag with his name filled with so many weird articles anyway? Where was the good stuff at? He let out a quiet groan, continuing to search for something that actually deserved his attention.

He continued to search, post after post, article after article, photo after photo. After a couple moments digging throughout the interknot, a post from the “Archive of Our Eridu” caught his attention. Finally some good fan made content, Harumasa through, smirking slightly as he clicked the link and opened it.

“‘Harumasa/Reader’, huh..?” He mumbled, shifting in his chair as his eyes moved past the tags, skipping the summary and the author’s notes to finally get to the actual story.

‘You watch your captive slowly regain his consciousness, his muffled groans barely making past the improvised gag and his limbs’ moving restrained by the tightly tied ropes’- Harumasa arched one eyebrow at the content and its form, remembering one of the fanfic’s tags.

Right, this should be someone else’s point-of-view, which means… the said ‘captive’ was him? Wait, how was he supposed to read it if he was doing both roles?

Harumasa frowned, shaking his head. Probably the author never expected him, of all the users in the interknot, to stumble upon this. Still, he should probably just think of ‘reader’ as a different person while reading it, that should make things easier for him to understand and get through the text.

So, back to it…

It was a straight forward setting. The reader in question was playing the role of some sort of criminal organization’s leader while Harumasa played… well, his own role. For some reason, the author skipped the previous events that led to the current scene - Harumasa assumed that would be too much context - and the first paragraphs described some sort of… interrogation? At least, that’s what it sounded like.

“Heh, am I going to fall in love with the bad guys here..?” Harumasa giggled with the thought, surprisingly amused as the reader threatened and tried to intimidate him. “They are making me sound so stubborn here…”

Harumasa continued to read, flinching when the reader snatched the tape off his lips, imagining how much it would sting, and even unawarely mimicking his reactions described in the story: parted lips, half closed eyes, erratic breathing…

‘We already took care of your colleagues. No one is coming to save you, Asaba, you better speak’, he shifted in his seat at that line. ‘Hah, even better. Do your worst, you’ll get nothing from me’, was he actually this sassy? And what’s up with the attitude? Harumasa shook his head, rolling his eyes at the cliché threats from the reader. Maybe he did set the bar too high for some amateur stor-

‘Pain? Who said anything about hurting you, my dear Asaba? I have my own methods of making you talk’, oh? Was that the beginning of the steamy parts? Harumasa looked around the office, making sure Yanagi was still in her seat before continuing his reading.

Being caught reading this kind of stuff would be even worse than getting caught slacking off. Gladly, Soukaku seemed to be doing an amazing job at keeping the deputy chief busy.

Alright, time to resume it.

‘What?’. ‘Ah, Asaba… I’ve always been fond of you, I could never bring myself to hurt that pretty face of yours, but… I still need to make you talk, right?’ He could feel his cheeks warming up a little, imagining the scene a bit beyond what was written.

Ah, this better not be something weird awakening inside him, Harumasa thought.

There was still no action. The story only described how the reader walked around him, wandering in the room and circling the chair he was tied to while explaining to Harumasa the roots of their affection for him. Still, Harumasa couldn’t help but to feel his heart beating a little faster with anticipation - both as the audience and as a form of sympathy towards his character.

The next part had Harumasa leaning more and more on the edge of his seat, going an inch forward with each word read. The description mentioned something like the reader sitting at Harumasa’s lap, popping his shirt’s buttons open one after the other and pushing his shirt away, exposing his bare chest.

‘Get your hands… off me, you f-freak!’. “Why? Are you nervous? Feeling shy? Maybe there is something stuck at the back of your throat? Let me get it out for you’.

Harumasa felt a shiver run up his spine, regretting ever underestimating one of his fan’s work. The description had him wrapped around its finger and even he himself couldn’t figure out what was so good about it - neither what made it sound so awfully hot.

‘You began to drag your fingers around his toned midriff, circling his navel before teasing his sides. You watched Harumasa tense up, sucking in stomach, trying to avoid your touch. You chuckle, fondly, tickling the edge of his waist.’

So this was the torture they had in mind? Tickling? Harumasa looked up, lowering his phone for a moment and contemplating the idea. Unexpected, yes. Unwelcomed? Not sure. He couldn’t really tell if he was ticklish - was there ever a time for him to figure it out?

Of course, the lack of this confirmation didn’t stop this fan, it seemed. He should probably leave a like in their work for the effort - finding a piece of information that Harumasa himself wasn’t aware of. Heh.

But, back to the fanfiction… Why was it making his heart flutter? Or, even better, why was he struck by the imaginary feeling of it?

He could feel a ghost-like sensation roaming his body. Unconsciously hitching his breath, brushing a hand over whatever spot was mentioned to get rid of the phantom feeling and even catching himself smiling at nothing but his own thoughts.

‘Harumasa laugh helplessly under your hands. You dig your finds under his arms, squirming your way past his defenses despite his efforts into clasping his elbows to his torso. He throws his head back and you can’t help but to give his neck a little tease’.

“...w-what kind of freak would be into this stuff?” He groaned quietly, pouting while his cheeks felt warmer than before. Harumasa even lifted his hand - after hesitating a little, for some reason - to rub his neck, trying to shift his attention from the nonexistent sensation.

Stomach, side, neck, ears, thighs, knees, waist, feet, back… even his hands! How many words did that fanfic even have?!

Harumasa crossed his legs before leaning back into the chair, his breathing quickened for some reason. “A-ahm, does anyone mind if I turn on the AC?” Harumasa whined sheepishly, hooking a finger around his collar to loosen it.

“No, go ah- Asaba-kun, are you feeling alright?” Yanagi asked, furrowing her brows slightly with concern. “You actually look sick, do you need me to-”

“I-it’s fine, deputy chief,” Harumasa sighed, wiping a drop of sweat from the side of his face and fanning it with his hand. “Just a little… overwhelmed, I’ll be fine,” he pulled out a forced smile, making Yanagi nod despite the doubt.

He should stop reading these things at work…

Brr, brr.

Wise lifted his head from his pillow, turning around and giving his attention to his phone instead of trying to sleep. Reaching out to it, taking him less than a couple swipes to check the reason behind the noise.

[A guest left ludos on Harumasa’s Interrogation], read the e-mail. Wise shrugged, placing his phone back on the table. Well, at least something was doing numbers, unlike this commission he was stuck at… but he should be able to do it after a good nap!

#zenless zone zero #zzz #zenless zone zero tickling #zzz tickling #asaba harumasa #lee!harumasa #ticklish!harumasa #kinda #i mean #there is also a bit of #harumasa x reader #but oh well #whatever

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gdinthehouseee · 2 months ago

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Misread: CHOI SEUNG-HYUN x READER

summary: you and your boyfriend, seung-hyun, argue right before he leaves for a world tour. after radio silence, you come across photos of him with a woman you've never seen before.

word count: 7296

tags: angst to fluff; miscommunication, passive-aggression, social media, established relationship

ao3 link

The argument had started over something stupid—so stupid that now, standing in the middle of your apartment with the silence stretching painfully between you, you could barely even remember how it began. Maybe it was about how distracted he had been lately, glued to his phone answering messages from managers, producers, and stylists instead of being present with you. Or maybe it was about the way he brushed off your concerns when you asked if he’d even have time to call while on tour. It wasn’t like you didn’t understand—this was his job, his dream, and you’d always supported him. But tonight, when you had finally asked, “Do you even want to talk to me while you’re gone?” and Seung-hyun had sighed, rubbing his temples like the conversation itself exhausted him, something inside you snapped.

You weren’t asking for much. Just reassurance. Just something to hold onto while he was halfway across the world. But instead of giving you that, he got defensive. Said you were overthinking, that of course he’d call if he could, “Why do you always do this before I leave?” and suddenly, the conversation spiraled into something bigger, something neither of you knew how to pull back from.

Now, after all the sharp words and tense silences, you were standing there with your arms crossed over your chest, watching him adjust the strap of his duffel bag, looking every bit like he couldn’t wait to be anywhere but here.

Seung-hyun stood near the doorway, his duffel bag slung over his shoulder, ready to leave for the airport. His usually soft eyes were distant, guarded, his jaw clenched tight like he was forcing himself to stay calm.

“I don’t want to leave like this,” he muttered, voice lower than usual.

“Then don’t,” you shot back, arms crossed over your chest. It wasn’t fair. You knew he had to go—knew he had a world tour ahead of him, knew fans were waiting in cities across the globe. But the idea of him walking out the door like this, leaving the fight unresolved, made your stomach twist painfully.

He let out a slow exhale, pinching the bridge of his nose before meeting your gaze. “I don’t have a choice.”

You hated that answer. Hated how it reminded you that no matter how much you wanted him to stay, his career always came first. You weren’t unreasonable—you never had been. You knew how much this tour meant to him, but in this moment, the resentment gnawed at you.

“Right. You never do,” you mumbled, looking away.

That seemed to strike a nerve. His expression shifted, frustration flashing across his face. “That’s not fair,” he said, shaking his head.

Maybe it wasn’t. Maybe none of this was fair. But the hurt sitting heavy in your mind made it impossible to think clearly. The silence between you stretched unbearably long.

He ran a hand through his hair, glancing at the time on his phone. He hesitated for a second—like he wanted to say something else—but then just sighed, adjusting the strap of his bag over his shoulder. “I’ll call you,” he said, voice quieter now, less sharp.

You didn’t answer.

And then he was gone. The door clicked shut behind him, the sound sharp in the quiet apartment, final in a way that made your stomach sink. You didn’t move, didn’t breathe for a second, as if waiting—hoping—that he might turn back, hesitate, say something. Literally anything. But the seconds stretched on, and the only thing you heard was the distant hum of a car pulling away. The fight still lingered in the air, thick and suffocating, but now there was nothing left to say. Just the fading warmth of where he had been standing, the emptiness he left behind, and the sharp sting in your chest as the reality of it all settled deep into your bones.

Seung-hyun exhaled slowly, pressing his head against the cool window as the van pulled away from your apartment. The city lights blurred past him, but all he could see was the look on your face before he walked out the door—hurt, frustrated, unwilling to meet his eyes. The image sat heavy in his chest, making it hard to breathe, but he clenched his jaw and forced himself to look straight ahead. The other guys were talking around him, but their voices barely registered to him, until—

“Everything good?” Youngbae’s voice cut through the haze, quieter than the rest, meant only for him.

Seung-hyun almost said yes. Almost shrugged it off, pretended like he wasn’t sitting here replaying every second of that fight, every sharp word he shouldn’t have said. But instead, he just let out a slow sigh, tilting his head back against the seat.

“I don’t know,” he admitted.

Ji-yong glanced at him from across the van, raising an eyebrow. “You two fought again?”

Seung-hyun didn’t answer, but the silence was enough.

Daesung let out a small chuckle, shaking his head. “Hyung, you always do this before we leave.”

Seung-hyun’s brows furrowed at that. “Do what?”

“Push her away,” Youngbae said simply. “Like if you fight before you go, maybe missing her won’t hurt as much.”

Seung-hyun’s chest tightened. Deep down, he knew they were right. Even when he opened his mouth, ready to argue, the words never came.

Similarly, the phone call never came either. You had stayed up all night waiting—hoping—your phone would light up with the familiar contact: a heart next to his name and a cute candid photo you had taken of him, revenge for all the seemingly unflattering ones he had already snapped of you. Thinking the air might have cleared a little, hoping you would go back to the usual “I miss you” and “I’m counting down the days until you get back,” but there was nothing. Silence. Deafening radio silence.

Hours turned into days. Or, has it been a week already?

Too long has passed since you had heard from your boyfriend. Desperately, you tried to not let it affect you, doing everything you possibly could to distract you. Your best friend wanted you to come over? You were already ringing her doorbell. Your mother was calling you? Accepted the call within the first ring. You had already lost count of how many times you’ve cleaned your apartment, drowning in the smell of air freshener.

At first, you made excuses for him. He was busy. The time zones were a mess. Rehearsals, soundchecks, meet-and-greets, performances—his schedule was packed, and you didn’t want to be the needy partner blowing up his phone. But as the days passed with radio silence, it got harder to ignore the sick feeling twisting in your stomach.

You told yourself not to spiral. You told yourself not to check social media. But late at night, when sleep wouldn’t come and the ache in your chest felt unbearable, you gave in. You opened Instagram, not even searching for his name—just scrolling mindlessly, hoping for a distraction.

Instead, you found her. She wasn’t someone you recognized. A model, maybe? An influencer? The name in her handle didn’t ring any bells, but her latest post made your stomach drop. It was a series of pictures. The first one was innocent enough—a shot of her at the latest concert stop, front row, flashing a peace sign with the stage glowing behind her. The next was a blurry clip of the crowd chanting for the group.

And then the last one. It was a backstage photo. Of him.

Seung-hyun stood beside her, still in his stage outfit, hair slightly damp from the performance. He wasn’t looking at the camera, caught mid-laugh, and she was leaning in close—too close. Close enough that she could whisper something in his ear. Close enough that the moment felt private in a way that made your stomach twist. Beneath the photo was the caption that made your blood run cold:

"New future husband hard launch?😉😂 #luckygirl"

Your heart stopped. Your fingers trembled as you scrolled to the comments, your vision blurring as you read through them.

"Omg HAHAHA wait are you guys a thing???""Future husband??? 👀👀 spill the tea, bestie!""Lowkey jealous but you’d be such a hot couple."“Isn’t he dating someone else?”

You stared at the screen, your breath coming in uneven, shallow gasps. Your mind scrambled for explanations—Maybe she was just joking. Maybe it was a stupid, meaningless caption. Maybe this was all in your head. Surely, right? But the sick feeling in your stomach told you otherwise.

He hadn’t called. Hadn’t texted. Hadn’t reached out to you at all. And now, this was how you were seeing him? Through someone else’s camera lens, with some random woman calling him her man while the world laughed along? You had spent days missing him. Worrying about him. Hoping that the silence between you would break. And now, you weren’t sure if you even wanted to hear from him at all.

You weren’t going to cry over him.

Not when the world thought he was out there, living his best life. Not when he hadn’t even bothered to check in with you. Not when some woman was calling him her husband while you sat alone, feeling like a fool for waiting on a call that never came. Fine. If he wasn’t going to acknowledge you, you weren’t going to sit around and sulk. You were going to remind him exactly what he was missing.

You stood in front of the mirror, angling your phone just right. The dress you had on was perfect—smooth, effortless, the kind that made people do a double take. Hair tousled just enough to look artfully undone, lips glossed and parted as if the picture had been taken in the middle of some glamorous, stolen moment. Not too obvious. Not too desperate. Just enough to make hearts race.

And then, the final touch—the caption. Something light, something teasing.

"Since everyone’s playing pretend, let’s all pretend I’m the main event tonight. 😉✨"

You hit post. Your notifications exploded almost instantly.

"EXCUSE ME???" "This is a personal attack." "Who do I need to fight?" "Oh, she’s in her villain era."

Good.

You smirked, tossing your phone aside. It wasn’t about revenge. Not really. You just wanted to feel wanted. To feel like someone out there was paying attention to you—since clearly, the one person who was supposed to care hadn’t even spared you a second of his time.

And then—your phone buzzed. You snatched it up so fast your hand nearly cramped. A notification. Your heart pounded. Was it him? Did he finally get the hint? Your stomach dropped.

“Choi Seung-hyun liked your post.”

Seung-hyun leaned back against the couch, stretching his legs out as he absentmindedly scrolled through his phone. The post-show adrenaline was finally wearing off, leaving behind that familiar mix of exhaustion and restlessness. The other guys were scattered around their hotel suite—Youngbae flipping through TV channels, Ji-yong lazily sipping on a drink, Daesung scrolling on his own phone.

Then he saw it. Your photo. His brows lifted slightly as he clicked on it.

Damn.

You looked… really good. The kind of good that made his chest tighten just a little. The dress, the way your hair framed your face, the effortless confidence in your pose. His thumb hovered for half a second before he double-tapped. Like.

A small smirk tugged at his lips. You always looked good, but this? This was something else. He should probably text you—say something, tell you how stunning you looked. In fact, he was about to, but then he saw the caption. His head tilted slightly. Huh. That was… dramatic. But you always had a way with words, right? Maybe you were just playing around, soaking up some attention like you did once in a while. Nothing wrong with that.

"Well, that’s not good," Youngbae muttered from across the room.

Seung-hyun glanced up. "Huh?"

Youngbae was now leaning over, looking at his screen. "That post. From your girl."

Seung-hyun frowned, locking his phone. "What about it?"

Ji-yong, who had been half-dozing in an armchair, cracked one eye open. "She posted something?"

Youngbae sighed and rubbed his temple. "It’s not the post, it’s the context." He turned back to Seung-hyun. "You haven’t talked to her, have you?"

"I mean… not directly. But I liked the post."

Ji-yong let out an audible scoff. "And you think that counts?"

Seung-hyun gave him a look. "Acknowledging it is something."

Daesung, who had been silent up until now, finally spoke up, shaking his head. "Hyung, no offense, but that’s kind of dumb."

Seung-hyun scowled. "What?"

"You two had a fight the night before we left," Youngbae reminded him. "A big one. And instead of calling or texting, you just disappear for days and then ‘like’ her thirst trap?"

“Thirst trap?"

Ji-yong snorted. "That dress? The pose? That’s a ‘look at me, I’m hot and unbothered’ post if I’ve ever seen one. And that caption? She’s pissed."

Seung-hyun looked back at his phone, suddenly rereading the words with fresh eyes. Something heavy settled in his stomach. Fuck.

"Okay, maybe she’s mad," he admitted. "But if she wanted to talk, she could’ve just messaged me too."

Youngbae gave him the most unimpressed look imaginable. "Are you actually serious right now?"

Daesung sighed and slowly dragged his hand down his face. “Surely, she’s trying to get you to message first, no?”

Ji-yong, looking far too amused, muttered under his breath, "This is painful to watch."

Seung-hyun exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. He hadn’t meant to ignore you. Things had just… gotten busy. And yeah, maybe he had avoided reaching out because he didn’t know how to break the silence without making things worse. But now? Now, it was definitely worse.

Ji-yong had been lazily scrolling through his phone when something caught his eye. A headline that made him do a double take.

"BIGBANG’s T.O.P Spotted Getting Cozy with Mystery Woman—Is Love in the Air?"

His brows furrowed as he clicked on it. A series of pictures loaded, and his stomach dropped. Seung-hyun. With a woman. Ji-yong skimmed through the article, already feeling the headache coming on. The worst part wasn’t even the photos—it was the caption the woman had posted herself:

Oh.

He exhaled sharply, shaking his head. This was bad. Really bad.

Before he even thought about messaging and checking in on you, he instinctively checked your social media. And there it was. A brand-new post, just minutes ago. It wasn’t a selfie, it wasn’t even your face. A picture of your back to the camera, holding a glass of wine, very clearly not at home. The lighting was dim, warm, intimate. A restaurant? A spa? Somewhere expensive.

"Since everyone else is out exploring, maybe I should start too."

Ji-yong let out a low whistle. Yikes. But the real kicker? The comments.

He tapped on them, and his eyes immediately widened.

"I volunteer to be your tour guide. 👀🔥""Where are we traveling to, queen? Because I’ll book the flight RIGHT now.""Oh, she’s in her ‘mysterious and untouchable’ era, and I love it.""Damn, are we single now? 👀 Asking for myself.""Tell me why I’m staring at this like it’s a work of art. 😩😍"

"Ohhh, hyung," Daesung muttered, peeking over Ji-yong’s shoulder. "This is bad."

Youngbae snorted. "Check the likes."

Ji-yong scrolled up. Thousands. Blowing up in real time. And right there at the top? Seung-hyun. His very oblivious ass liked the photo.

"Bro." Ji-yong turned to look at him, absolutely baffled. "Have you got a death wish?"

"Huh?" Seung-hyun frowned, looking up from his phone.

"Did you even see what she just posted?" Ji-yong turned the screen toward him.

Seung-hyun’s brows pulled together as he took Ji-yong’s phone. For a moment, he just stared at the image, blinking like it hadn’t fully registered. Then he scrolled down. His grip on the phone tightened. Youngbae and Daesung peeked over his shoulder, reading along as the thirst comments kept rolling in.

"I’d like to explore with you. 😉" "Damn, whoever took this photo is one lucky person." "I’m free next weekend if you need a travel buddy. 😍" "Bet she’s sipping that wine while someone else is pouring it. 👀🔥"

Daesung winced. "This is kinda painful to watch."

Seung-hyun’s jaw clenched. His fingers gripped the phone a little too tightly, and Ji-yong could practically see the jealousy creeping into his expression.

"Who the hell are these people?" Seung-hyun muttered, scrolling through the comments with a frown.

"Her followers," Ji-yong said, raising an eyebrow. "Her very thirsty followers."

Seung-hyun’s eyes darkened slightly. "This guy just called her a work of art," he muttered, scowling. "And this one is talking about pouring her wine—what the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Ji-yong snorted. "Probably exactly what you think it means."

Seung-hyun glared at the screen like he was ready to fight someone.

"You’re mad?" Youngbae asked, amused. "You’re mad because other people are commenting on her post?"

Seung-hyun didn’t answer. But the muscle in his jaw twitched.

Ji-yong shook his head. "You’re an idiot."

Daesung sighed. "You should probably call her. Now."

Your phone buzzed against the polished kitchen counter, rattling next to the half-empty bottle of wine. You glanced down, expecting another notification—maybe a message from your friend group.

But it wasn’t them. It was Seung-hyun. Your stomach twisted. For days, there had been nothing. No texts. No calls. Just silence stretching between you like a chasm, widening with every passing second. You had told yourself you wouldn’t wait anymore. That you wouldn’t let him make you feel like this. And yet, your fingers hovered over the screen, hesitating.

Your best friend glanced over from the fridge, took one look at your expression, and quirked a brow. “That him?”

You didn’t answer.

The phone kept ringing. Once. Twice. Three times. Then, before the call could go to voicemail, you picked up.

At first, neither of you spoke. All you could hear on his end was faint background noise—the low murmur of voices, the hum of a car engine. He was probably still on the road, still miles and miles away. And yet, at this moment, it felt like he was standing right in front of you.

"You’re alive," you finally said, voice clipped.

He let out a slow breath. “I’m alive.”

"You wouldn’t think so, though," you muttered. "Since you’ve been acting like I don’t exist."

He was quiet for a second. Then, softer, "I know."

You let out a hollow laugh. "That’s it? You know? You disappear for days, and all you have to say is ‘I know’?"

“I messed up.”

Your chest tightened. You wanted to stay mad. You really, really did. But the exhaustion was catching up to you—the late nights staring at your phone, the ache in your chest that wouldn’t go away, the pit in your stomach when you saw those photos.

"Yeah," you said, voice quieter now. "You did."

Another beat of silence. Then—

"I saw your post," he murmured.

Your lips curled slightly, though there was no humor in it. "Oh? Liked what you saw?"

He exhaled sharply. "You know that’s not what I meant."

"Do I?"

"Where are you?"

You frowned. "What does it matter?"

"Because," his voice was tense now, "I need to know if I just made things worse."

You swallowed. "I’m at my best friend’s."

A pause. "Good," he said, relief lacing his voice. "I was worried you—" He stopped himself.

"Worried I what?" you pushed.

"Worried you were with someone else," he admitted.

You blinked. "Are you serious?"

"I know I don’t have the right to ask," he said quickly, "but I just—I saw your caption, I saw the comments, and I—I just..." He trailed off.

"You’re jealous?"

"I’m going crazy," he admitted, voice rough. "I’ve been trying to give you space, but then I saw those pictures going around, and I just—I didn’t want to make things worse."

Your throat tightened. "So instead, you disappeared?" you whispered.

"...Yeah."

You shook your head, tears suddenly pricking at your eyes. "You don’t get it, Seung-hyun. I needed you. I needed to hear from you, to know where we stood, and you just—just left me hanging."

"I didn’t know what to say," he murmured. "I was scared I’d lose you."

"You almost did," you said honestly.

The line went silent for a long moment. Then, voice hoarse, he asked, "Did you believe it?"

Your brows furrowed. "Believe what?"

"The rumors," he clarified. "That I was with her."

You swallowed hard, looking down. "...I didn’t want to. But what else was I supposed to think?"

Seung-hyun let out a slow breath. "She’s just one of the backup dancers. She was joking in the caption—I should have told her to take it down. I should have—God, I should have called you immediately. I wasn’t thinking."

You closed your eyes, exhaling shakily.

"Baby," his voice softened. "You have to know... there’s no one else. There’s only you. It’s always been you."

Your breath hitched.

A tear slipped down your cheek, but you quickly wiped it away. "Then why didn’t you just tell me that?"

"Because I was an idiot. Because I didn’t want to fight with you over the phone. Because I thought if I just... waited, it would all blow over."

"It didn’t," you murmured.

"I know," he said. "And I hate myself for it."

You pressed your fingers against your temples, trying to get rid of the headache forming.

"I miss you," he whispered.

Your eyes burned. "You don’t get to say that."

"But it’s true," he said, voice thick. "I miss you. I miss us. And I don’t want to go another day without fixing this."

"Then fix it. Because I don’t know how much longer I can do this."

"I will," he promised. "I’ll do whatever it takes."

"I’m tired, Seung-hyun."

"I know," he murmured. "Let me make it right. Please."

Your best friend, who had been quietly listening from the other side of the counter, finally spoke up. "He’s groveling. I’d milk this for at least another two weeks."

You let out a wet laugh, shaking your head. Seung-hyun, hearing the sound, let out a soft breath. "You laughed."

"Shut up," you murmured, sniffling.

He chuckled, but then, voice gentle, he said, "We’ll figure this out, okay?"

"...Okay."

"Can I call you tomorrow?"

You hesitated. But then, quietly, "Yeah."

"Good," he murmured. "Get some sleep, baby."

As soon as the call ended, you let out a slow, unsteady breath, the weight of everything settling over you. The emotions still swirled—anger, relief, exhaustion—all tangled together in a way that left your chest feeling tight. It wasn’t fixed, not completely, but the worst of the storm had passed.

Your best friend’s voice was soft when they spoke. “You should get some rest.”

You nodded, but even as you stood to make your way to the guest room, your mind wouldn’t quiet.

The past few days had been a mess of contradictions. You had been furious at him, but you had missed him. You had convinced yourself you wouldn’t care if he reached out, but the silence had still hurt. And tonight—after days of aching uncertainty—you finally had his voice in your ear again. The tension in his tone, the hesitation in his words… He had felt it too. That realization should have made you feel better, but instead, it just left you more exhausted.

You slipped under the covers, staring up at the ceiling. You wanted to believe things were okay now, that one conversation was enough to undo everything. But deep down, you knew it wasn’t that simple. There were still things unsaid, wounds that weren’t fully healed. And yet, for the first time in days, the heaviness in your chest didn’t feel unbearable. Maybe it wasn’t all better yet. But at least you weren’t alone in the uncertainty anymore.

Seung-hyun stared at his phone long after the call had ended, his grip tightening around the device as if holding onto it would somehow bring you closer. He had been an idiot. He knew that now. Letting the fight spiral out of control before leaving, staying silent when he should have called, being so oblivious that it took his bandmates to point out what was really going on—it was all one big, frustrating mess, and he had let it happen.

And then there were the pictures. Seung-hyun exhaled sharply, dragging a hand down his face as he leaned back against the hotel couch. He hadn’t even thought twice about them at the time, hadn’t realized what they must have looked like to you. That woman—someone he had only exchanged a handful of words with—had joked about him being her husband online, and suddenly the internet had exploded with speculation. His stomach twisted at the thought of you seeing that, scrolling through your phone and being blindsided by those pictures after days of radio silence. You had already been hurting. Already doubting him. And then he had handed you another reason to pull away.

A part of him had thought you’d lash out at him directly—call, text, anything—but you hadn’t. Instead, you had turned away from him completely, disappearing into your own world, posting pictures that felt like a quiet rebellion against the way he had made you feel. And the comments… He hadn’t even meant to look at them, but once he had, the simmering jealousy had been impossible to ignore.

He scrubbed a hand over his face and let out a slow breath, trying to push down the frustration rising in his chest. He was the one who had messed up. He didn’t get to be angry.

The sound of a door opening pulled him from his thoughts, and a moment later, Ji-yong appeared in the doorway, his sharp eyes immediately locking onto him. "You look like shit."

Seung-hyun huffed out a humorless laugh, tilting his head back against the couch. "Thanks."

Ji-yong walked further into the room, crossing his arms as he studied him. "Did you call her?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

Seung-hyun let out a long sigh, staring at the ceiling. "I don’t know, man. It helped, I guess. We talked. It wasn’t like before, but… it was something."

Ji-yong nodded slowly, but his expression didn’t soften. "You need to fix this."

"I know."

"No, I mean really fix it," Ji-yong pressed, his voice lower now, more serious. "You left things bad, disappeared on her for days, and then let the whole world think you’re running around with someone else. That’s a lot of shit to throw at someone, Seung-hyun. And you know her—she’s trying to act like it doesn’t bother her, but it does."

Seung-hyun clenched his jaw, his grip tightening around his phone again. He did know. That was what made it so much worse.

Ji-yong sighed, running a hand through his hair. "You’re lucky they even picked up the phone."

"I know," Seung-hyun muttered. He hated being reminded of it, but Ji-yong wasn’t wrong.

Silence settled between them, thick and heavy. Outside, the city lights flickered through the sheer hotel curtains, casting faint patterns across the floor. It felt distant, meaningless compared to the weight in his chest. After a moment, Ji-yong sat down in the chair across from him, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. "So… what are you gonna do?"

Seung-hyun stared at the floor, his mind already racing through possibilities. Words weren’t enough—not this time. He needed to do something. Something that would prove to you that you were the only thing that mattered to him.

He exhaled, determination settling in his bones. "Tomorrow, I’m making this right."

The soft morning light seeped through your curtains, painting golden streaks across your bed. You shifted under the covers, stretching your limbs before blindly reaching for your phone on the nightstand. The past few days have left you feeling drained—mentally, emotionally, and physically.

With a deep sigh, you unlocked your phone, expecting the usual string of notifications. Instead, one message sat at the top of your screen.

“No more distance. I need to see you. Please come to me.”

You blinked, still groggy, but before you could even process the weight of his words, another notification popped up.

Flight confirmation - Your itinerary is ready

Your heart skipped. Clicking on it, you scanned the details—a first-class ticket, departing in the afternoon.

He had booked everything.

Your fingers tightened around your phone as emotions swirled inside you—anger, relief, disbelief, but most of all, longing. For days, you had been drowning in silence, missing him while convincing yourself that maybe he wasn’t missing you as much in return. But this? This was something different.

You could almost hear his voice in that short message. No teasing, no playfulness. Just quiet, raw honesty. He needed you. Swallowing hard, you hesitated before typing.

“You really did this?”

Three dots appeared almost instantly. "Of course. Just say yes, aein. Please."

Aein. The pet name he hadn’t called you since before the fight. The walls you had built around your heart cracked, just a little.

You stared at the ticket details again, your thumb hovering over the screen. The past few days had been a blur of overthinking and assumptions, of hurt and longing. But now, he was reaching out, breaking the silence, proving that he wasn’t willing to let things stay broken.

And neither were you.

The flight felt longer than it actually was. No matter how comfortable the first-class seat was, your nerves wouldn’t let you relax. You had spent the entire time staring out the window, replaying the last few days in your head, wondering what would happen the moment you saw him again. Would he apologize first? Would you? Would you even be able to speak at all?

Your fingers curled tightly around the strap of your bag as you stepped through the arrival gate. You expected to go straight to the hotel or venue where the group was staying. The moment you stepped past baggage claim, a suited man holding a discreet sign with your name approached you.

"Miss, please follow me."

You blinked, momentarily caught off guard. You had assumed there would be a driver waiting, but this felt more formal, more arranged. Nodding, you let him lead you through the airport, weaving through crowds effortlessly until you reached a private exit. The chilly air hit you as soon as the doors slid open, and waiting at the curb was a sleek black car, its tinted windows shielding whoever was inside.

Your pulse quickened.

The security guard opened the back door, stepping aside as he gestured for you to get in. You hesitated for only a second before slipping inside, the warmth of the car wrapping around you instantly.

And there he was.

Seung-hyun sat in the back, one arm resting lazily against the door, the other curled into a fist against his mouth as if deep in thought. The dim lighting inside cast soft shadows across his face, but his eyes—sharp and unreadable—locked onto yours the moment you settled into the seat beside him.

The door shut, sealing you both inside.

For a moment, neither of you spoke. The tension from days of silence and misunderstanding settled heavily between you, thick enough to suffocate. Then, without a word, he reached out. His fingers found yours, hesitant at first, before gripping tightly—like he was afraid you’d pull away. You didn’t. Instead, you let out a slow, shaky breath, your body finally relaxing for the first time in days.

"I didn’t want to wait another second to see you," he murmured, voice low, rough with something unspoken. "Are we okay?"

Your throat tightened. He looked exhausted. He looked like he had been carrying the same weight you had, like the past few days had worn him down just as much.

You turned your hand over in his grip, intertwining your fingers with his.

"We will be," you whispered back.

The car pulled away from the curb, but neither of you let go. The ride is quiet at first. Not awkward, not tense—just… quiet. The kind of silence that feels heavy, filled with too many unspoken words, too many days of missed conversations. You don’t look at him at first, your fingers fidgeting in your lap as the city lights blur past the tinted windows. But you feel his gaze, feel the way he keeps sneaking glances at you, like he’s trying to make sure you’re really there.

After a few minutes, Seung-hyun finally breaks the silence. His voice is soft, careful. "You look tired."

You let out a breathy laugh. "Well, I did just take an international flight."

He hums, nodding slowly. Another beat of silence passes before he finally reaches out, hesitating for just a second before gently taking your hand in his. His grip is warm, a little tentative, but firm enough that it sends a small rush of comfort through you.

“You didn’t have to come,” he murmurs, running his thumb over your knuckles. “But I’m glad you did.”

You don’t say anything, just squeeze his hand back. It’s the first step toward fixing things. And then, because he can’t help himself, his lips twitch with the beginning of a smirk. "So… that post."

You blink, pulling your hand away slightly, but he doesn’t let you go. "What about it?" you ask, even though you already know exactly what he’s referring to.

“You had a whole army in your comments,” he muses, tilting his head. “Should I be worried?”

You roll your eyes, turning your face toward the window to hide the way your lips curve up just a little. "Why? You didn’t seem worried when you liked it."

His smirk falters just slightly, like he wasn’t expecting you to throw that back at him. But then he chuckles under his breath, leaning in just a bit closer. "Maybe I just wanted to see if you'd notice."

You do turn to face him then, arching a brow. "You’re unbelievable."

He grins, and for the first time in days, it feels like things between you aren’t so fragile anymore.

“Yeah, yeah,” he says, giving your fingers another squeeze. “But you still came all this way to see me.”

And when he looks at you like that—like you’re the only thing in the world that matters—you can’t really argue.

The car slows as it approaches the hotel, and Seung-hyun finally drops his teasing, his voice turning quiet again. "We’ll talk properly when we get upstairs, okay?"

You nod, and this time, when he reaches for your hand, you don’t pull away.

The elevator ride up to his hotel suite is quiet again, but this time, it’s different. The weight between you isn’t as heavy—it’s softer, filled with something that feels more like anticipation than tension. Seung-hyun never lets go of your hand, his grip firm but gentle as he leads you through the hotel, past security, past curious glances.

When the door to his suite clicks shut behind you, he doesn’t speak right away. He just stands there, exhaling slowly, his shoulders rising and falling like the weight of the past few days is finally catching up to him. He turns to you, and for the first time in days, you get a full look at him. He looks exhausted. Not just physically, but something deeper than that. There’s a heaviness in his eyes, like he hasn’t been sleeping much.

"I’m sorry." His voice is hoarse, like he’s been holding it in too long.

You swallow hard, arms crossing over your chest—not out of defiance, but to keep yourself from reaching for him too soon. "For what?"

His brows furrow slightly, and he exhales again, shaking his head. "For all of it." His voice wavers just slightly. "For leaving when we were still fighting. For shutting down instead of talking to you. For letting you think, even for a second, that you weren’t the most important thing to me."

Your breath catches. The words hit deep, settling in places you didn’t realize were still aching.

"Then why didn’t you call?" Your voice is quiet now, softer than you intended. "Why did I have to find out about you from an article?"

Seung-hyun lets out a slow, unsteady breath, raking a hand through his hair. He looks away for a moment, like he’s gathering his thoughts, and when he looks back, his eyes are glassy.

"Because I ruin things."

The words come out so raw, so unfiltered, that it knocks the air from your lungs.

"Seung-hyun—"

"No, just—just let me say this." He swallows hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing, and when he speaks again, his voice cracks. "I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to be good at this. Every time something goes wrong, I just... shut down. Because if I say the wrong thing, if I handle it the wrong way, then maybe—" He hesitates, inhaling sharply. "Maybe you’ll realize I’m not worth all this trouble."

Your chest tightens.

"That’s not—"

"It is." He lets out a bitter laugh, looking away again. His hands clench at his sides before he forces himself to meet your gaze. "I’ve spent years being careful. Being the one who stays a little distant, a little detached, because that’s safer. But then you came along, and suddenly I didn’t want to be distant anymore." His voice drops lower, like he’s admitting a secret. "And that terrifies me."

His words break something open inside of you.

You step forward before he can pull away, reaching for his face, your fingers brushing against his jaw. His breath stutters as you touch him, like he wasn’t expecting it.

"You’re not going to lose me," you whisper. "I need you to believe that."

His eyes close for a moment, his jaw tightening beneath your touch. When he opens them again, there’s something vulnerable there, something unguarded.

"I missed you," he says, voice barely above a whisper. His hands lift, hesitating for just a second before settling on your waist, pulling you in. "I missed you so much, and I hated myself for making you feel like I didn’t."

Your heart clenches.

"Then don’t do it again," you murmur.

He exhales shakily, pressing his forehead to yours. "I won’t. I swear."

A beat of silence passes before he chokes out a soft, unsteady laugh. "God, I hate fighting with you."

You let out a watery laugh, sniffling as you press a hand against his chest. "Then stop picking fights with me."

His lips twitch, but then his expression turns serious again. "I mean it. I don’t want to push you away again. I don’t know how to be perfect, but I—" He inhales deeply. "I just want to be enough for you."

"You are."

His arms tighten around you, like he’s trying to memorize the feeling of you being this close again. And when he finally, finally kisses you, it’s not desperate or rushed. It’s slow, filled with all the words he hasn’t said, all the emotions he’s been holding back. His lips linger against yours, warm and desperate, like he’s trying to pour every unspoken word into the kiss. His hands cradle your face, thumbs brushing your cheekbones, and you sink into him, fingers curling into the front of his shirt to pull him even closer.

You barely notice the sound of a door opening. “Well, damn. Guess we don’t have to ask if they made up.”

You jolt, tearing yourself away from Seung-hyun with wide eyes. He groans, his forehead dropping against your shoulder as he exhales sharply. “Of course.”

Ji-yong stands in the doorway, arms crossed, a smirk tugging at his lips. Youngbae is right beside him, trying (and failing) to suppress a knowing grin. Daesung just looks amused.

“You guys do realize there are other rooms for that, right?” Ji-yong teases, stepping inside like he owns the place.

Seung-hyun sighs dramatically, straightening up but keeping an arm around you. “Do you ever knock?”

“Do you ever not make a scene?” Ji-yong fires back, plopping down onto the couch like this is the most entertaining thing he’s seen all week. “We come looking for you, and this is what we walk into? Could’ve at least warned us.”

Daesung hums thoughtfully. “At least they weren’t on the table.”

Youngbae snorts, while you gasp. “Excuse me?!”

Seung-hyun groans again, rubbing his temples. “Can you all just leave?”

“Oh, absolutely not.” Ji-yong grins. “This is way too fun.”

Your face burns as you try to shove your embarrassment away. “Well, if you must know, we were just—”

“Sucking each other’s faces off?”

“—Having a conversation.” You glare at Ji-yong, who just smirks wider.

“Right. A very intense conversation, huh?” Youngbae adds, wiggling his eyebrows.

You groan, burying your face in Seung-hyun’s shoulder as he sighs, rubbing slow circles on your back. “They’re insufferable,” he mutters, though there’s no real bite behind it.

Daesung grins. “But really, we were just coming to tell you rehearsal’s starting soon.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be there in a minute.”

“Try not to get too distracted.”

The three of them grin, sharing knowing looks. And with that, they finally leave, their laughter trailing behind them. Seung-hyun sighs as the door finally swings shut, shaking his head. “Unbelievable.”

You can’t help but laugh, still leaning into his chest. “They really have no shame.”

“None at all.” He huffs, rubbing soothing circles on your back. “But at least they’re gone now.”

You tilt your head up to look at him, smiling softly. “You sure you don’t need to go after them?”

He hums in thought, then tightens his hold on you. “Mm… No. They can wait a little longer.”

You giggle as he leans down, pressing a kiss to your forehead. His lips linger there, warm and gentle, before he moves to your cheek, then the tip of your nose.

“Seung-hyun,” you whisper, your smile growing as he pulls back just enough to meet your eyes.

“What?” He feigns innocence, though the small smirk tugging at his lips gives him away. “I didn’t get to properly say goodbye before we were rudely interrupted.”

You roll your eyes playfully. “That was barely a goodbye kiss.”

His smirk deepens. “You want a real one, then?”

Before you can answer, he leans in, brushing his lips against yours in a slow, sweet kiss—nothing desperate, nothing rushed, just soft affection wrapped in warmth. His hand cups your cheek, thumb stroking lightly as if he wants to memorize the feeling of you under his touch.

When he finally pulls away, he rests his forehead against yours with a content sigh. “I really missed you.”

Your heart swells, and you slide your arms around his neck, fingers threading into his hair. “I missed you too.”

He closes his eyes, just holding you for a moment, his grip firm like he never wants to let go.

A sharp knock on the door ruins the peaceful moment.

“Hyung, if you don’t come out now, I swear we’ll start rehearsal without you!” Ji-yong’s voice calls through the door, followed by muffled laughter from the others.

Seung-hyun groans. “I hate them.”

You giggle, pressing one last kiss to his jaw before nudging him toward the door. “Go. Before they really do leave you behind.”

He sighs dramatically but finally steps back. “Fine. But I’m coming straight back to you after.”

“I’ll be here.”

taglist: @thanosscrossmain @maskedcrawford @mirahyun @riddlerloveb0t @onyxmango @sherrayyyyy @seunghyunwifey @mattsturniolosbabymama @redhoodedtoad @petersasteria

#choi seunghyun #choi seunghyun x reader #t.o.p x reader #t.o.p bigbang #t.o.p #bigbang #bigbang x reader #kpop #angst to fluff #miscommunication

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s4nniebe4r · 2 months ago

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the roommate

part six: brush it off

pairing: roommate! san x fem! reader

synopsis: you finally let out your frustrations, and so does he?

wc: 2.7k

tags: slow burn, roommates, enemies to lovers, angst, forced proximity, eventual romance, some explicit language

etc: double update?! yes, because i can and am impatient! do we like angry san? also, let’s keep in mind this is not an accurate description of who san is and how he acts! this is purely fiction! not proofread, liebchens!

previous part next part

It’s been a few days since your last call with Seonghwa about your recent episode. You walk into the living room, ready to finally relax after a long day. Your muscles are really just craving the comfort of the couch, the cushions usually engulf you like a hug. But, as you make your way to it, your eyes narrow in disbelief.

San’s stuff is everywhere. His dirty habit is all over the living area.

His jacket is draped over the armrest, his sneakers are left carelessly at the foot of the couch, and his bag is sprawled across the cushions on the opposite side that he’s on. He’s completely unaware of the chaos, too focused on whatever he had on the screen.

You exhale sharply, standing still for a moment, trying to calm your frustration. It’s one of those things that’s been slowly driving you mad, but now? You just can’t let it go anymore.

Without looking up from the screen, San mutters, “What?”

You scowled, hands now moving to your hips. “I didn’t realize the couch was now exclusively yours,” you shot, your voice laced with irritation.

San glances up briefly, his face impassive. “You could have just asked me to move it, instead of acting like a martyr. Or you could move it yourself,” he says casually, as if it isn’t a big deal.

Your frustration only flares. You aren’t about to just let it slide. “I shouldn’t have to move it,” you snap, sitting down heavily next to the pile of things, trying to make it clear how annoyed you are. You’re now wedged between the cushions in a tight, uncomfortable spot. You try to ignore the inconvenience, but the tension only grows. “I’m not your personal maid.”

San doesn’t seem to get the hint, he never does. His gaze returns to the TV, focusing on the game, his expression rather unchanged. “You could sit somewhere else,” he says, his voice light, like it’s no big deal.

You shake your head, crossing your arms over your chest, now sandwiched between the cushions and his mess. “I shouldn’t have to ask to sit down, San. Why does your stuff always have to be everywhere?”

His response comes with a soft, distracted laugh. “You’re making a big deal out of nothing. It’s just the couch, just move the stuff. It’s not that hard.”

Your jaw tightens, the irritation now rising into anger. You can’t understand why he’s so oblivious to how it makes you feel. “It’s not just about the couch, San. It’s everything. The way you take up the space here and never even think about how it affects me.”

San doesn’t take his eyes off the screen. He’s fully immersed in the game now, his thumb flicking over the controller with easy skill as he moves characters around. “You could just tell me if you want something changed. But instead, you’ve kept quiet and now you’re just spouting bullshit.”

The words sting more than they should. You feel your chest tighten. “I’m always telling you. But you never listen. You only listen when it’s conveniently late.”

He huffs, his jaw setting in a way that very distinctly shows he’s getting annoyed too. “I’m listening right now, aren’t I? But I can’t do anything about it if you don’t actually talk to me when it matters.”

You’re standing up now, your frustration bubbling over, no longer able to stay stuck between what you see as a rock and a hard place, even though it’s really just his mess of your space. “It’s not just about the damn couch, okay? It’s everything. You’ve been playing this game for hours, and I can’t even get a moment to myself. It’s like you’re so wrapped up in what you want and nothing else matters.”

San finally looks over at you, his brows furrowed, but then his eyes return to the screen, his fingers never pausing. “You’re really going to bring that up? The TV? The game? That’s what’s bothering you? Right now?”

You scoff, throwing your hands in the air. “It’s not just the damn game, San. It’s everything! The TV, the temperature—you always keep it freezing in here! And let’s not even talk about the dishes, or the fact that you leave your crap everywhere, like it’s some kind of storage space.”

San finally pauses his games, his fingers tightening their grip around the controller. He turns his head toward you, brows furrowing. “So now I’m supposed to keep the place at your perfect temperature? What, just because you can’t handle a little cold? I live here too, Y/N.”

“That’s not the point, and you know it. I’m trying to say, you don’t think about anyone else living here. You don’t even try to meet me halfway.”

San lets out a dry laugh, shaking his head slightly. “That’s rich, coming from you. You act like you’re the only one dealing with anything in this apartment.”

Your fists unconsciously start to clench at your sides, heat rising in your chest. “Oh really? So please, San, tell me—what exactly am I doing that’s so unbearable?”

His jaw tightens. “For starters? You take up all the cabinets in the bathroom, you’re constantly rearranging the kitchen items, and you never turn the stove off. Not to mention you’re always slamming shit around when you’re mad instead of saying anything. If something bothers you so much, why do I have to play detective and figure it out? All you have to do is say something, literally anything.”

You breath hitches, air stuck in your throat. You knew he noticed, but hearing him say it like that—like you’re childish—makes your stomach twist with something sharp. “Maybe because when I do say something, you brush it off. You never actually listen until it gets to this point. And by then, it’s too late to even say anything further.”

San stands up now, tossing the controller onto the couch a little rougher than he should have, meeting you now. “No, you just wait until you’re pissed off to dump everything on me all at once. And I’m supposed to just sit here and take it?”

And just like that, your throat tightens, a familiar sting rising behind your eyes. It always happens when things get too emotionally charged, when the tension builds past the point of your control. You hate it. You hate that no matter how angry you feel, your body betrays you, turning frustration into something softer, something weaker. That’s why you never liked fighting. Why you never want to bring things up with San. Because you know, you knew it would end like this—your voice shaking, your vision blurring, emotions spilling over in ways you can't stop. You don’t want to cry. Not here, not now, and definitely not in front of him. You tilt your head back slightly, eyes flickering toward the ceiling as if that will somehow force the tears back into place.

He exhales sharply. “Oh, what, now you’re gonna act like I’m the bad guy?” His voice is a little quieter now, but there’s something else there—frustration, exhaustion. Maybe something more? But you don’t let yourself think too much about it.

You shake your head, stepping back, trying to regain even the smallest bit of control over this moment, over yourself. “I don’t want to do this, San.”

“Oh, you don’t?” He scoffs, his head dipping a little, his own voice strained now. “Because it sure as hell seems like you do—considering you just unloaded every single thing that’s been pissing you off for months.”

You clench your jaw, turning on your heel to leave. “I’m done. I don’t even know why I—”

But before you can't even take another step, his hand wraps around your wrist. Firm. Not forceful, but it’s definitely there. Stopping you. Pulling you back, closer than where you stood previously.

“You can’t just say all of that and walk away,” he says, and this time, his voice is low. Measured. Almost unreadable, as what you’ve grown accustomed to.

You freeze. His fingers are warm despite the cold air that always lingers in the apartment. His grip isn’t too tight, but it anchors you in your place, and suddenly, there's a stolen breath from your lungs.

You look up at him, ready to snap, ready to pull your arm away as harshly as you can, to—

But the moment your eyes meet his, everything shifts.

The sharp words on your tongue die out where they were, swallowed by the space between you—what little of it remains. His fingers are still wrapped around your wrist. You should pull away, you should end this here before the arguments gets to be too much, but neither of you move.

Instead, you decided to continue, it seems that’s what he wants, anyway.

“I wouldn’t have had to say all of that if you actually listened,” you bite out, voice wavering between anger and something else that you can’t quite pinpoint.

San steps closer. Not enough to touch, but enough that you can feel the heat radiating from him, enough that you can see the way his muscles flex in his face, the way his brows furrow as his own frustration builds. “You’re acting like I never pay attention to you,” he snaps. “Like I don’t—” He stops himself, exhales sharply, shaking his head. “Forget it.”

“No,” you push, voice still shaking but a little firmer now. “Say it, you clearly want to.”

His eyes flicker with something unreadable. The muscle in his jaw locks. “You think I don’t notice things about you?” He lets out, his voice low and rougher now. “That I don’t know you get cold way too easily, even when it’s barely snowing outside? That you always sigh when the water filter isn’t taken care of? That you leave the lights on and act like you don’t even though I see you do it night after night?”

Your breath catches where it is.

His grip on your wrist loosens now, but doesn’t drop.

You should say something—anything—but the way he’s looking at you is knocking the air out of your lungs. And it only makes you more uncomfortable with how you’re feeling. The tears in your eyes begging to be let loose.

And then—his eyes flicker downward.

Your stomach flips.

San isn’t breathing. Neither are you. Your pulse thrums in your ears, drowning out every thought, every rational part of you screaming that this, this is too close, this is too much. You can feel the warmth of his breath, the tension surrounding you, it’s so thick, it’s suffocating.

And then, his hand moves.

Gently, so gently, something so different than the first touch on your wrist. His fingers brush up against the side of your face. His thumb drags across your jaw, moving up until it swipes across your cheek, catching the single tear that had fallen against your will.

You suck in a breath—barely a sound, but you know he hears it. How could he not?

San doesn't move away. Not yet. His thumb lingers for a fraction of a second longer than it should, his touch warm, his expression unreadable.

You don’t move. You can’t. There’s something different in the way he’s looking at you now, looking into you—not quite anger, it’s not soft, but something simmering beneath it all, something too heavy, too much to put your finger on. His brows are drawn together and his jaw is tensing, relaxing, and tensing all over again, like he’s trying to decide between something.

And yet, through it all, his hands don’t leave your skin.

Your own breath is shallow, barely there, as if exhaling too harshly would shatter whatever fragile thing is spinning itself between you.

San’s eyes flicker, tracing every inch of your face—lingering at the corner of your lips, dipping briefly to your mouth before darting back up like he wasn’t supposed to look, like he wasn’t even supposed to think about it.

His thumb moves again, featherlight across your cheekbone, following the path of the tear that betrayed you. His touch burns, knot in the way that hurts, but in the way that it brands itself into your memory, searing its permanence, a heat that will stay long after he eventually decides to let go.

You swallow, your throat dry, too tight, too tense. Your own fingers twitch at your sides, caught in something invisible between pushing him away or pulling him a little closer.

He’s still looking at you. You’re still looking at him.

And inevitably, your eyes flutter shut.

That’s all it seems to take.

San’s fingers shift, tilting your face upwards, guiding you just a little closer. His other hand leaves your wrist, skimming lightly up the length of your arm, tracing the fabric of your sleeve until his palm ghosts over your shoulder.

The distance between you is barely anything now—a breath away, you can feel it.

And then—

Your phone rings.

The sharp buzzing in your pocket shatters the moment, yanking you back into reality so fast it makes your head spin.

San pulls back instantly, almost as fast as you, exhaling harshly, as if just realizing how close you both had been; like he was suddenly snapped out of something he wasn’t supposed to be in. His hand drops from your skin as if he was burnt from the touch of it. His jaw clenches, and before you can say anything—before you can even breathe properly—he runs a hand through his hair, stepping back, the heat of his touch lingering against your skin.

You don’t look at him when you answer the call. But you don’t have to, because you can feel his gaze burning into you.

You blink, chest rising and falling way too fast, mind scrambling to catch up to what just happened.

Seonghwa.

His name flashes on your screen like a cruel joke, and with trembling fingers, you fumble to answer. San doesn’t say anything. But out of the corner of your eye, you see it—his hand running through his hair, gripping at it a little too harshly, his jaw clenched so tight you think it might hurt.

You don’t let yourself look at him any longer.

You clear your throat, voice uneven, and lift the phone to your ear as you turn on your heel one last time for the night, and leave—quickly, too quickly—before he can say anything, before you can process the way his stare is still boring into your back.

The door shuts behind you harshly as you step into your room, pressing your forehead against the cold frame of it for just a second, trying to collect yourself.

“Y/N?” Seonghwa’s voice is light, casual, completely unaware of what he just interrupted.

“Uh—yeah,” you breathe, trying to force normalcy back into your tone.

“You good?”

“Yeah, just—yeah. What’s up?”

“You want to hang out tomorrow?” Seonghwa asks easily, not even pushing the wreckage of whatever just happened on the other side of the line. “Me and the other guys are getting together for an evening. We thought you’d wanna come.”

You press your lips together, fingers curling around your phone as your gaze flickers toward the door. You can still feel San’s presence just beyond it, the weight of everything that almost happened settling into your chest like a storm waiting to let out its first stroke of lightning.

But instead of acknowledging it, instead of thinking about it, you force yourself to focus on Seognhwa’s words instead. And you pretend.

“Yeah, I’ll be there.” You let out.

“Okay, and what about San? He’s at the apartment, right? I figured I could get an answer from him while I’m at it.” He responds back as he puts his phone on speaker to do whatever it was that he needed.

“Uh…” You pause. “We’ll be there.”

“Great! We’ll see you tomorrow.” Seonghwa says as he moves around his apartment. “Oh and that reminds me…” He continues.

And you pretend. At least you don’t have to deal with what’s beyond your bedroom door until tomorrow evening. So you hum into the speaker and let Seonghwa continue.

#choi san #san #san ff #san fanfic #san fluff #san soft hours #san x reader #ateez fluff #ateez soft hours #ateez #ateez soft thought #ateez choi san #ateez san #choi san x reader #choi san fanfic #choi san ff #choi san fic

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jujutsubaby · 1 year ago

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⛓️ lonely at the top ⛓️

☆ pairing: satoru gojo x afab!reader x true form!sukuna ☆ summary: you are the great ryomen sukuna's favorite healer from the heian era, reincarnated in the modern time. for centuries, you have also been his favorite lover. but when sukuna returns one day with a shockingly handsome blue-eyed sorcerer, you cannot help but feel threatened. no matter what sukuna's plans are for this newcomer, however, you're willing to do whatever it takes to stay on top. ☆ tags: slight canon divergence, smut with a lil plot ¬‿¬ ☆ warnings: MINORS DNI!!!! handjob, oral sex (m/f!receiving; yes this includes sukuna's abdomen mouth lmao); voyeurism; exhibitionism; fingering; p in v; anal; overstimulation; masturbation ☆ a/n: ok the promised (and voted upon) sukugo fic is FINALLY here my loves :3 i had to add reader in the mix too though bc girls just wanna have fun. also writing this kinda made me a sukuna truther :/ maybe i understand gege and sukuna kaisen just a little bit more now :/ ANYWAY ENJOY!!! ☆ wc: 8k

when you had heard of Lord Sukuna's imminent duel with the infamous Satoru Gojo, you knew it would be prudent to practice your Reverse Cursed Technique. you had always been Lord Sukuna's favorite healer (among other things), but that had been the Heian Era. this new time was as foreign and strange to you as the delicate new body into which you had been reincarnated.

and so, when Lord Sukuna re-enters the compound you share with his other most trusted servants and loudly calls for you, you are prepared. flexing your practiced fingers and preparing to channel positive cursed energy, you hurry to the threshold from which his voice had emanated and immediately sink to a kneeling position, your head turned to the floor. as expected, Lord Sukuna had come straight to the healing quarters.

"you summoned me, Lord Sukuna?"

Lord Sukuna approaches you; his footsteps sound heavy and slow. he is exhausted, you can tell, but he does not seem grievously injured as you had expected. so why did he call for you?

your head still inclined downwards, you stifle a gasp as you notice rivulets of blood darkening the floor beneath you and staining your pristine robes.

"you will heal him," Lord Sukuna says simply. you hear a heavy thud hitting the bed you had prepared so carefully for your lord. actually, mystifyingly, you hear two thuds. you chance a glance upwards, and your heart drops when you see that Lord Sukuna has indeed deposited severed halves of some unfortunate sorcerer's body onto the bed. from his pallor, you can tell he has already lost quite a lot of blood. this is beyond any healing you have ever performed in any era. you briefly wonder whether your beloved lord is setting you up to fail when he speaks up.

"i trust you understand that failure is not an option."

"yes, my lord."

"y/n," he says more quietly. you nearly shudder at the sound of his tongue lavishing attention on your name. "i keep you in my employ because you are the only healer worthy of serving me."

it is a statement of arrogance, but it is also one of reassurance. someone who has served as his trusted servant for as long as you have learns how to understand his sometimes esoteric cues.

you feel a firm hand grip your jaw and tilt your face upwards. you are greeted by a sight you have not seen in centuries: Lord Sukuna in his true form, in all his magnificence. his tattoos stand starkly against his glistening torso. his arms, now four in number as you recall, are corded with muscle; the grip his massive hand has on your face could easily crush your windpipe — and yet, it does not. it never would, so long as you serve your purpose. you cannot help but bask in his glowing charisma. this was the sorcerer you were so proud to serve.

"it is my honor to serve you, my lord. i will heal the sorcerer, i swear it."

noticing your desirous eyes raking over his form, his cruel mouth forms a lazy smirk, which is mirrored in the mouth of his stomach. the effect is equal parts unnerving and disarming.

"come, y/n," Lord Sukuna says, pleased with your reaction to his true form. "let us see your patient for the evening." he seizes your shoulders with his second set of arms, and indelicately pulls you to your feet before marching you towards the bed.

Lord Sukuna must still be unused to inhabiting his true body after possessing so many weak mortal vessels, you muse, for he is being far rougher with you than usual. you find that you do not mind, however. in spite of the grave situation, you feel heat embarrassingly beginning to pool at the apex of your thighs at the feel of Lord Sukuna's thick fingers and their crushing grip on your narrow shoulders.

the man in the bed is muscular, although nowhere close to Lord Sukuna's physique. that said, he looks youthful, and strong enough to have put up a good fight. perhaps he would even be strong enough to recover from his horrendous injuries under your expert healing hands.

but who was this man? why was Lord Sukuna so insistent upon healing him? and how was he injured like this in the first place?

your eyes wander to his upper half, and you pause on his face. handsome, with delicate features and a shock of messy white hair. his eyes are slightly agape, and you note that they are the uncommon blue of a summer sea.

blue?

you gasp in spite of yourself and turn to your master, momentarily forgetting that propriety dictates that you not maintain eye contact with someone so many levels above yourself.

"forgive me, Lord Sukuna, but...Satoru Gojo?"

Lord Sukuna does not seem to mind your lapse in etiquette, as he meets your gaze with a grin.

"he put up a marvelous fight. talent like that should not be extinguished, even though most sorcerers doubtlessly dream of being defeated by somebody like the great Sukuna," he says.

Lord Sukuna was always able to make such grandiose statements about himself that would sound asinine coming from any mere man. with the great Lord Sukuna, statements like these are simply the truth. he has always been so far above any human you have known, which is why his fascination with Satoru Gojo is leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. mortal humans, including you, need to know their place. that maxim should include Satoru Gojo, too.

Lord Sukuna's voice shakes you from your reverie. "oh, and y/n?" his normally commanding voice is alarmingly soft, and laced with...something. something typically reserved for his favorites, like you.

"yes, Lord Sukuna?" you ask, carefully keeping your head angled downwards towards the bed so as not to repeat your earlier eye contact gaffe.

you watch as Lord Sukuna reaches a hand out towards Satoru Gojo's listless face to slap the young man's elegant cheek.

"do be gentle with your technique. i want this one staying pretty for me."

ah.

so that was why Lord Sukuna had taken such pains to rescue Satoru Gojo.

with that, Lord Sukuna turns on his heel and leaves you to your patient.

you anticipated healing Gojo's injuries to be your greatest challenge yet, but it is far more taxing than you ever could have known. your Reverse Cursed Technique was meant for healing injuries, but what had happened with Gojo's body was almost beyond an injury.

it had taken you hours in the first place to even figure out a way to use your RCT in this situation, until you had realized that delicate threads of cursed energy still emanated from Gojo's body. even if it was physically severed, his cursed energy still lived, if only barely. it is a testament to the sheer magnitude of Gojo's cursed energy that some still survives; no wonder he had impressed Lord Sukuna so.

you use your RCT to trace the threads of cursed energy from one half of Gojo's body to the other; in doing so, you are able to treat the severing merely as a thinning of cursed energy, and thus as an injury rather than a full separation. you breathe a sigh of relief as you observe one thread of his torso knit itself back together under your watchful eye.

now to repeat the process for the entire circumference of his body. you stretch and sigh; this would be a long night. at least you have a way forward now, though. disappointing Lord Sukuna was never an option.

as you continue reconnecting the flesh and gristle that makes up Satoru Gojo, you find yourself increasingly unable to ignore his objective beauty. as a healer, you always possessed great admiration for the physical form, and Satoru Gojo just happened to be a prime specimen. perhaps the fact that Lord Sukuna had found him to be a worthy adversary (and prize, you remind yourself) also influenced your judgment.

you feel a strange intermingling of lust, jealousy, and envy at the thought. you are well aware that Lord Sukuna has a prodigious sexual appetite that requires countless mortals to satisfy, but you have long been secure in your position as his favorite plaything. now, however, compared to Satoru Gojo, you cannot be so certain; he possesses beauty and power in spades.

you shake your head. this is neither the time nor the place to be evaluating Lord Sukuna’s judgment; favorite or not, it is your duty to complete the task he so graciously entrusted you with. you are not sure of how long you continue to sew Satoru Gojo’s body back together, but you are aware that the sun’s citrus glow has long faded.

Lord Sukuna had always reminded you of the sun, although you have never been bold enough to tell him such a silly romanticism. but in its radiant beauty, burning power, and distance alike, you see your liege. much like the sun, Lord Sukuna had shone on you, and in his light, you had blossomed. you had been an obscure village herbalist’s apprentice until he had found you; you had hardly even been aware of your latent healing powers. it had been Lord Sukuna who had seen your immense potential, and who had honed your sorcery to the level it was today.

even the fact that he had burned down your village the day he whisked you away had done little to dim your fervent gratitude.

the moon begins to rise higher in the night sky now, its light filtering through the shuttered windows of the healing quarters as you continue working. Satoru Gojo’s natural beauty takes on an ethereal glow when bathed in moonlight. the battle between him and Lord Sukuna must have been a sight to behold; as you reconnect his body, you feel his cursed energy growing and twisting into itself with taut strength.

Finally, when his halves become whole again, you sit back and admire your handiwork. The full moon that night meant you did not require a lantern, but the moon is setting now, and you want to give Satoru Gojo’s body a final check.

as you rise to leave the room for a lantern, you feel a hand clasp firmly about your wrist. you gasp softly.

“have i died? am i dead right now?” Satoru Gojo’s voice is hoarse with disuse. you had not expected him to be conscious again yet given the state of him; you suppose the fact that he is is a testament both to your healing ability and to his innate strength.

you sit back down, noticing that he does not loosen his grip on your wrist.

“you are still alive, Satoru Gojo, for i have healed your wounds,” you reply matter of factly.

his blue eyes, now that they are fully open and conscious, are even more shocking than they were when you first glimpsed them earlier that day. they seem to glow from within; they look like they hold full worlds within their depths.

“that’s weird,” Gojo continues. “i could’ve sworn i died and went to heaven seeing as i’m looking at an angel right now.” only when you see that he is grinning impishly at you do you realize he is flirting with you.

your lip curls in distaste, and you extricate your hand from his grasp.

“i am no angel. i am a sorcerer, as you are. you were as good as dead, split clean in half, but i channeled my Reverse Cursed Technique to heal you,” you conclude with pride.

Gojo looks down at his stomach, shiny and pink with fresh scar tissue.

“you must be some sorcerer, then. i was positive i was a goner back there. i’m not sure even Shoko could’ve healed me like this. really nice work,” he muses. he is right, of course. you are unsure of who Shoko is, but Gojo is correct that very few sorcerers could heal such severe injuries. all the same, you loathe the warmth you feel at his admiration; Lord Sukuna’s confidence should be enough for you.

“anyway,” Gojo continues, “who are you exactly? where am i?”

“Lord Sukuna brought you here,” you say. “I am his healer.”

surely the mention of his formidable foe would shake Gojo’s arrogance. you relish the fear that Lord Sukuna’s name seems to inspire in other mortals.

this was unfortunately not the case with Gojo.

“that’s sweet, the ol’ guy wanted me healed up, huh?”

you bristle. “you will address Lord Sukuna with respect!”

Gojo merely laughs at your response, which infuriates you further. “i, for one, fail to see why he deigned to save such an insolent whelp like you,” you snap, succumbing to your rising temper.

“really?” Gojo asks, his blue eyes full of mirth. “guess you don’t get the old guy the way i do. i’m pretty sure I understand why he wanted me alive.”

“then be so kind as to enlighten me,” you say sardonically.

“i’ve been the strongest sorcerer around for basically my whole life,” Gojo says. in spite of the sarcasm in your voice when you asked him to explain himself, he seems sincere. “fighting Sukuna was the first time i felt even remotely challenged. he even technically beat me, i guess.”

he watches you, waiting for you to respond. when you are still silent, he continues.

“i’m sure he feels the same way i do. i know i challenged him the way he challenged me, and for sorcerers at our level, finding a true adversary is hard. once you do find one, letting go can be just as hard.” Gojo sounds wistful; you wonder if he speaks from experience.

“i guess what i’m saying is that it’s lonely at the top,” he finishes; his earlier amusement is gone, and he seems somber now.

you find that you pity Gojo. to be a sorcerer can be a lonesome existence. Lord Sukuna, while alone in his caliber, at least has you and his other servants and devotees to warm and distract him. does Satoru Gojo have anyone?

you reach a hand forward and begin tracing the planes of his pale face with your fingers. he lacks Lord Sukuna’s raw power, but his beauty is exquisite. Gojo leans into your comforting touch.

“how can i ever thank you for bringing me back to life?” he murmurs. as your hand passes near his lips, he stills it with his own and kisses it softly.

you gasp sharply and withdraw your hand as though burned.

“that was wrong,” you say urgently. “you cannot touch me like that.”

Gojo sighs. “you really are devoted to that old man, aren’t you?”

“we both belong to Lord Sukuna,” you reply, emphasizing his proper title. “you must respect his authority over us both.”

“maybe you belong to Sukuku,” Gojo says; you cringe at his inane nickname for Lord Sukuna, but you suppose anything is better than merely calling him an old man. “i, on the other hand, only belong to me, myself, and i.”

you exhale in irritation. no matter how great a sorcerer Satoru Gojo is, his arrogance is certainly grating. part of you wishes you had left him severed in two — at least he was quieter that way. you recall Lord Sukuna once saying that the greatest sorcerers always seemed to possess even greater mental eccentricities; Satoru Gojo certainly proves that theory.

to your annoyance, as he speaks, he takes your hand in his again. you are bemused to find, however, that you do not wish to remove it. his hands are wiry, yet so powerful. there is power within your hands as well, you muse as you intertwine your fingers almost instinctively. your irritation, admiration, and pride are all coalescing into a confusing burn of…passion. how inconvenient.

“you are rather presumptuous, are you not?” comes a voice from the doorway. you gasp and tear your hand from Gojo’s once more, immediately prostrating yourself before Lord Sukuna. Gojo makes no move to even bow his head, meanwhile. typical.

“rise, y/n,” Lord Sukuna continues. “you must be giving our guest a rather unsavory impression of me with your theatrics.” slowly, you raise your face from the floor and see Lord Sukuna has crouched before you. he takes your face in one of his hands. you shiver — it has been so long since you have felt the touch of his true form. “am i not a benevolent master to you?” he murmurs; his face is so close that you can feel his warm, humid breath on the shell of your ear. it is all you can do not to tremble from desire.

with you still reeling from the close contact, Lord Sukuna rises smoothly back to his feet and saunters to Gojo’s bedside.

“you seem in high spirits, Satoru Gojo. i feared i had gone too far with you,” Lord Sukuna says, his tone casual as though he had not cloven the younger man’s body in two just hours earlier.

“oh, i can take much more than that, old man,” Gojo says, innuendo easily discernible from his tone. you cannot stop yourself from rolling your eyes; from what you had seen thus far, Satoru Gojo seemed to flirt with everybody he meets. that said, the image of Lord Sukuna and Satoru Gojo, of what Gojo’s playful tone was implying…your mind’s eye is running amok, loathe as you are to admit it. doubtlessly Lord Sukuna’s true form and the sleepless stress of the evening are perverting your mind in unforeseen ways, you reassure yourself.

Lord Sukuna seems tickled by Gojo’s irreverence, and you try not to feel envious. “is that so?” he inquires.

“a credit to your lovely healer, i gotta say,” Gojo continues, his shocking blue eyes twinkling as they meet yours. “she has a rare talent. you sure you need her? i have half a mind to take her with me when we’re done here.”

you know Gojo is being insufferable right now, and moreover irreverent to Lord Sukuna. you know that. but he’s just so handsome, and so appreciative, and so talented in his own right…you feel powerless to stop the breath from catching in your throat, flustered at his attention.

you find yourself thinking about how his smooth skin felt beneath your touch; cool, then warm as you breathed life back into him with your reverse cursed technique. taut, pulsating with the cursed power and blood in his veins.

so lost are you in your meditations of Gojo’s flesh that you nearly miss what Lord Sukuna replies.

“y/n certainly is a first rate sorcerer,” he says, flinging a fond look over his shoulder at you; predictably, you preen at his praise.

“what i enjoy most about y/n’s skill,” he continues, “is her fastidiousness. she leaves no stone unturned. in healing, jujutsu sorcery…and everything else. isn’t that right?” he asks you.

“y-you are too kind, Lord Sukuna,” you bluster, trembling like a newborn fawn. you are usually so comfortable with him, but the presence of a stranger is making you look upon Lord Sukuna with new eyes again.

“and i trust you have been equally thorough with our guest?” Lord Sukuna proceeds.

“of course, Lord Sukuna.”

“how disappointing to hear you lie to me, y/n,” Lord Sukuna tuts. “i know you have not been fully attentive to Satoru Gojo’s recovery.”

your face grows hot. what did you do wrong? you take pride in your work, after all; you would never do a sloppy job no matter the patient, but especially not for one so important to Lord Sukuna.

“my lord? i am afraid i misunderstand you. i have followed only the most careful healing protocols,” you say; this is as close as you dare come to talking back. Lord Sukuna is kind and merciful and great, but much like the fire he commands, his warmth can flare uncontrollably and singe everything in its vicinity if you are not cautious.

“have you made absolutely sure, for example, that Satoru Gojo’s new body is completely functional?” Lord Sukuna prods. he has now turned to face you. one set of his arms is crossed over his chest, while the other is crossed behind his back. his face looks stern, but the mouth on his stomach betrays a smirk.

“Satoru Gojo seems to be functioning as i would expect, my lord,” you reply.

“show me,” he says, stepping aside from Satoru Gojo’s bed. his body had been obscuring Gojo from your view, but you see now that the younger sorcerer has been watching the exchange with a hungry grin. there is clearly a subtext you are missing, but you dare not speculate what it is.

you approach Gojo and perform an examination of his body, as you would any of your patients. you test his reflexes, and check his pupils’ dilation and contraction (during the latter, they look like just a pinprick lost in an ocean. nobody ever warned you of the six eyes’ beauty). when you palpate his ribs, he groans slightly; you feel the sound vibrate through your fingers.

“he is recovering as i might expect, Lord Sukuna. of course, we must keep him under observation, but —”

Lord Sukuna cuts you off with an impatient click of his tongue. “i will not tolerate your inattention to detail!” he growls. your heart starts beating violently, feeling like it’s throwing itself against your breast from within.

you fight to keep your voice steady.

“please forgive my stupidity, my lord,” you grovel, prostrating yourself once more. “i truly am unsure of what more you want me to check. please, if you could just help me, i promise this will never occur again.”

you are mortified to feel the white-hot prickling of tears at the corners of your eyes. Lord Sukuna had never spoken to you this way, not even when you had just begun working for him. back then, you had known next to nothing compared to your knowledge now. you rack your useless brain for something, anything, you might have missed, and come up empty. stupid, stupid girl. you just know this is the fault of Satoru Gojo, that irritating, gorgeous interloper. it is even more humiliating to be berated like this in his presence.

at Lord Sukuna’s silence, you direct your eyes as high as they can go from your position on the ground. you cannot see his face from this angle but you see his broad second mouth has gone from smirking to smiling outright with all its teeth. is he…not actually angry?

you raise your head a little further, emboldened by the sight, and see Lord Sukuna himself smiling down at you, his two expressions identical.

“what a pretty sight you make,” he coos, “on all fours looking up at me like that. my pliant, obedient girl.”

he lowers one of his hands to cup himself through his loose pants, and you clench your thighs together; you are immune to neither the effect of his words, nor to the sight before you.

he seamlessly bends down and raises you to your feet; as he holds you against him, it’s all you can do to hold yourself back from rutting against his massive body. but Lord Sukuna has always valued your restraint, and you know he has something planned for you.

he rotates you now so your back is to him, and cages you tightly to his body with all four arms. you gasp; you have forgotten this delicious sensation, of being so thoroughly engulfed by Lord Sukuna that it is almost as if he has subsumed you entirely. he has turned you to face Gojo, who has been watching the scene unfold with great interest. you feel Lord Sukuna’s hardness growing behind you, but you resist the urge to grind into it and remain perfectly still. his pliant, obedient girl.

“now, go attend to our guest,” he says, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear with a finger.

“yes, my lord,” you breathe, so aroused that you are nearly in pain.

he then bends down until his lips tickle the back of your ear, making you shiver.

“show Satoru Gojo that that mouth of yours is meant for greater things than just making pretty little apologies to me,” he murmurs; you feel his voice reverberate through your whole body. the last thing you want to do is detach yourself from Lord Sukuna right now, but you know what he desires of you, and you are always so eager to impress him. this is one of the things he loves about you, you know.

you return to Satoru Gojo’s bed as though to continue your examination; this time, however, you straddle him, desperate for just an ounce of friction to relieve your throbbing arousal.

“i thought you had forgotten about me,” he pouts.

“stop speaking, you stupid, beautiful man,” you reply, before tearing a kiss from his mouth. his lips are still slightly chapped from his hours of unconsciousness, and you rake your teeth across them. he groans into your mouth as you roll your hips until you feel him beginning to grow hard beneath you; the sensation sense frissons of pleasure through you, but you are single-minded in your task. you break your kiss abruptly and sit back, smirking at the pathetic whine Gojo lets out at your sudden absence.

Gojo is only wearing a simple robe you had dressed him in after repairing him; this provides you with convenient access to conduct your examination. you withdraw a vial of oil you had kept in the pocket of your own robes (admittedly in anticipation of Lord Sukuna’s arrival), spread it across your hand, and begin stroking him. “it seems that everything is in working order,” you remark as his erection grows under your expert ministrations. he moans and bucks into your hand.

“p-please…” Gojo pants. the sound of his neediness goes straight to your core, which is rapidly growing wetter. this is not the time to pay attention to yourself, though; not when you’re attending to a patient.

“‘please’ what, Satoru Gojo?” you tease; you know he has wanted to feel your mouth around him ever since Lord Sukuna alluded to it. you are enjoying watching this powerful sorcerer squirm by your hand, however. you glance over your shoulder and see Lord Sukuna is stroking himself off as well, his pants doffed entirely. you gulp; it has been so very long since Lord Sukuna has been in his own body; the sight of his girth is making you flush with desire.

meeting your gaze, Lord Sukuna blows a kiss in your direction, and you bite your lip to keep yourself from whining in sheer need to have him inside you. the sooner you obey him and pleasure Satoru Gojo, the sooner you may have the honor of feeling him stretch your walls; and so, you turn back to your guest.

Gojo has the most pathetic look in his stunning blue eyes, driven half mad by yet unfulfilled lust. his plush lips are twisted in a pained grimace. you see him moving his hand to give himself the pleasure you are denying him, but you hold it in place firmly.

“you’ve been such a patient boy so far; don’t ruin it now,” you coo, nipping his lower lip. you then undo his robe and crawl backwards until your face hovers over his engorged cock. you place a light kiss at its warm tip, licking off a bead of precum, before looking back up at him through heavily lidded eyes. Gojo tilts his head back, exposing the delicate white expanse of his throat.

“Please, y/n!” he cries. “i need you!”

the sound of your name on his needy tongue is having quite an effect on you, and you finally take pity on him; he only just recovered, after all. in one smooth motion, you take as much of his length as you can in your mouth. Gojo groans at the feeling of the warm wetness engulfing his cock, and you begin moving your head up and down, complementing the motions with your tongue as you cup his balls with your free hand.

“feel free to gag her,” Lord Sukuna calls from his corner of the room. “her little throat can take it.”

Lord Sukuna instructing Gojo on how to fuck your mouth is turning you on more than you can handle, and you moan involuntarily around his length. Gojo threads his fingers through your hair and pushes your head down on him; you swallow and feel him filling your mouth, his tip battering your throat mercilessly. you can tell from his increasing pace, from the guttural growls the feeling of you is drawing from him, that he must be getting close.

finally, finally, you feel a strong, calloused, beautifully familiar pair of hands dig into the flesh of your hips, and you could cry in relief.

“you have been such a good girl for me,” Lord Sukuna hums sensually. “and i always reward loyalty.” you buck your hips backwards into him, raising them to provide him readier access to your dripping cunt. you feel the pads of his thumbs stroke over your ass as his tongue begins lapping at your folds. his second tongue, you can tell, from its breadth and roughness plundering you. for all its added size compared to his primary tongue, however, Lord Sukuna is no less exacting with it, and he is soon circling your clit with painful accuracy. he does not wait long before giving you the pleasure you crave, and almost embarrassingly quickly, you come all over his massive tongue with a wanton moan.

with the sound of your orgasm, and the feel of your moan vibrating around him, Gojo fists your hair even more tightly and releases hot ropes into your throat with a growl.

“swallow it all,” Lord Sukuna commands, reaching forward to stroke your hair. “swallow it down for me.” you are nothing if not obedient, and you dutifully swallow Gojo’s whole load, not letting a single drop go to waste. Gojo leans back on the headboard, spent, and relaxes his vice grip on your hair. you pop your lips off him, licking them clean and smirking to yourself at your ability to have someone like Satoru Gojo at your mercy.

“i believe our guest needs time to rest before we continue,” you hear Lord Sukuna say from behind you. you turn and see that he is leaning back casually on one of the other beds in the healing quarters. “let us leave him for the time being, y/n.”

you are a little disappointed to be stopping already, but you comply; Lord Sukuna is probably correct that too much excitement for Gojo could hinder his healing process. you make your way towards the doorway, yawning a little, when you feel a firm hand close around your wrist. before you have a chance to react, you’re roughly tugged backwards, spinning directly into Lord Sukuna’s firm chest.

“i don’t believe i dismissed you, did i?” he purrs into your ear, and a thrill of excitement slithers through your body.

“did i?” he repeats, pinching the tender skin at your waist at your silence.

“n-no,” you gasp, hardly able to focus over your excitement for what will inevitably follow.

Lord Sukuna twists his hand, making you hiss lightly at the pleasurable pain.

“‘no’ what, y/n? how is it you should address me?”

“no, Lord Sukuna,” you manage to breathe out. he lets out a low chuckle that reverberates through his chest before bending you over an empty bed, holding both your wrists behind your back with one of his hands as he pushes your head down with another. you are already incredibly aroused when you feel a third hand begin to explore your slick folds.

“already so wet for me, are you?” he teases; you can hear the smirk in his voice. you can only whimper in response. he easily inserts two fingers into you, eliciting a sharp cry when he hooks them around and lightly tickles the sensitive spot that can make you come apart.

“now,” you manage to grind out between your teeth. “please, my lord…i need you inside me now…”

“making demands now?” Lord Sukuna taunts. “we certainly are feeling cheeky this evening, aren’t we?”

in spite of his words of chastisement, however, Lord Sukuna seems intent on granting your wishes, and you feel his stiff head, moist with precum, brushing once, twice, thrice against your entrance, building up friction. then, in one decisive motion, he enters you at last; Lord Sukuna was, by all definitions and especially mortal standards, extremely well-endowed; however, you have been ready for him for so long that his length faces little resistance. you sigh in relief at the feel of his massive girth stretching your walls, making you feel so full and complete. at times like this, you feel that your body was created to accommodate him, that being used like this by him was your most sacred purpose.

you push back against him, trying to seat him even more deeply within yourself. in response, he strokes your hair affectionately. he then pulls out slightly, and with one more thrust, he bottoms out in you with a groan.

he begins to drive into you with greater speed and urgency, two of his hands holding your hips in place so tightly that you know his broad fingertips will leave bruises. he adjusts his angle, pushing your face into the mattress and bending over you until your bodies are flush, and he continues at an unrelenting pace. your pleasure continues to build as he bottoms out again and again inside you, his massive second tongue slavering lasciviously over the curves of your back, until you come for the second time that night. you cry out in ecstasy without shame, feeling your walls clench even more tightly around Lord Sukuna. he groans at the sensation and sinks his teeth into your shoulder as he empties himself into you until his come drips down your thighs.

utterly sated, you begin to crawl out from under Lord Sukuna’s massive form, your legs trembling with exertion, pleasure, and pain alike. your shaky breath leaves your lungs all at once when he abruptly flips you on your back. he is so imposing and beautiful, hovering over you like this, with an inscrutable look in his cruel, narrow eyes.

“i believe i already told you, y/n,” he growls, “you are dismissed only when i dismiss you. and i am nowhere near through with you yet.”

holding himself up with two arms, he takes your hand with a third and draws it down until it is around his cock, which is already hard again.

“look what you do to me,” he murmurs, before using your hand to brush his tip against your still-tender vulva.

“i’m not yet ready, my lord,” you whimper weakly, trying to wriggle out from his grasp to no avail. you gasp as he grinds himself between your thighs and against your slickened entrance, growing harder still. the friction almost surpasses pleasure to pain after your powerful recent orgasm, and you keen loudly, unable to help yourself. “i-it’s…too much…i can’t take it,” you protest, tears rolling down your cheeks from the overstimulation.

Lord Sukuna promptly silences your noisy cries by clamping a swift hand to your throat.

“i alone dictate what you can and cannot take,” he declares, gently pressing on the sides of your neck and slipping a hand between your thighs as you squeeze them together. with uncharacteristic tenderness, he then kisses the tears from your cheeks.

“and i know you can take this.”

he stares into your eyes until you assent with a silent nod, and he smiles.

“good girl,” he whispers, before using his hand to pry your thighs apart and positioning himself properly. he buries himself inside you again, this time with minimal resistance — between your and his combined juices, you are sopping wet now. encouraged, he hitches your leg over his shoulder for deeper access to your core and begins thrusting into you in earnest. from this new angle, he drives right into your most sensitive inner point, and you are sure your cries can be heard throughout the compound. you hardly care who can hear you now, though; you hardly even pay attention to Gojo, who is now looking fully alert and wide-eyed at the show he is getting.

you dig your fingernails into Lord Sukuna’s sinuous shoulders and cry out again and again until your voice grows hoarse.

“say my name,” Lord Sukuna commands between his own grunts of pleasure.

“L-Lord Sukuna,” you moan, your voice shaking as his thrusts increase in pace. he wraps his hand around your throat again.

“my true name, y/n” he growls. he drives into you faster; you know he is close, and it is your privilege to bring him over the edge.

as soon as he releases his grasp on your neck, you reach up, stroking your hand through his unruly hair before pulling his ear down to your lips. “as you wish, Ryomen,” you purr into his ear. he moans and nearly folds you in half as he drives into you at a diabolical pace. as he reaches his peak, he withdraws his length from you and unleashes his load all over your stomach, marking you as his own; the thought that you had this effect on him, this power over him, multiplies your own pleasure, and you climax once again, your legs shaking and toes curling in sheer bliss.

Lord Sukuna rolls off of your body, both of you breathing heavily.

“now, y/n,” he pants, “you are dismissed. i shall attend to our guest in your stead.”

your exertions have exhausted you, but you are still obedient to him before anything else. and so, covered in both of your comes, his saliva, and a sheen of your own sweat, you bow deeply, and excuse yourself from the room. you are so utterly sated, so pleasurably sore, that all you can think of is taking a hot bath and resting.

well…almost all you can think of.

Lord Sukuna’s final statement has piqued your curiosity, however. and that is why, rather than returning right away to your own quarters, you find yourself kneeling on the floor peering around the curtain closing off the medical wing. if you are perfectly silent and still, you can remain undetected. besides, you reason, Gojo is still your patient, and so it behooves you to keep a close eye on his recovery.

(why leave everything to the imagination, after all?)

by the time you are settled in from your covert viewing spot, you see that Lord Sukuna is standing by Gojo’s bedside. the younger sorcerer is fully awake and alert now, peering up inquisitively with those blue eyes of his.

“is it finally my turn now, then?” he asks; you note that he sounds slightly petulant and roll your eyes. was he really jealous now, of all times?

You can only see his muscled back from where you sit, but you know from how his shoulders shake that Lord Sukuna is laughing at Gojo’s insubordination.

“you have seen what i demand, Satoru Gojo,” he says, crossing both sets of arms. “do you believe you can keep up, even in your state?”

you know that Lord Sukuna’s line of questioning is only pretense, of course. you recall why it was that Lord Sukuna had brought back Satoru Gojo for you to heal. and you remember his request — i want this one staying pretty for me, he had said.

“of course i can ‘keep up,’” Gojo scoffs. “can you keep up, old man? you seemed to get pretty tired just then.”

you grimace at Gojo’s disrespect, but Lord Sukuna is made of sterner stuff, and he just laughs even louder before clapping a pair of hands around Gojo’s beautiful face. you note that Gojo flinches, if only for a split second.

“such a mouth on you,” he hums, brushing a thumb across Gojo’s bottom lip. “just look at you. we will have to do something about that attitude.”

“like what?” Gojo asks, his eyes glimmering with anticipation that you can see even from where you sit. “what exactly is it you would do, Sukuku dear?”

“you seem to have your own ideas already. what is it you would have me do?” you can hear Lord Sukuna’s grin, even if you cannot see it.

Gojo simply winks.

“here’s an idea. why don’t you split me in half again?”

Lord Sukuna laughs heartily before leaning forward over Gojo’s bed, slightly obscuring your view.

“what an idea, Satoru Gojo. would you enjoy that?”

for some reason, Gojo does not answer right away; you try to crane your neck around to see what is happening, but he speaks again soon.

“y…yes…” he responds, suddenly breathless. “i believe i w-would.”

suddenly, you realize that, while you cannot see all of Gojo’s body from this angle, you can see one of Lord Sukuna’s arms moving rapidly up and down, and you can see a blush beginning to color Gojo’s delicate cheeks. your breath catches in your throat as you put together what it is you are witnessing. scrambling for a better view, you decide that both men are occupied enough that you can creep back into the corner of the room and hide behind one of the beds for a clearer angle.

“and are you certain you can truly take me? all of me?” Sukuna inquires, continuing his businesslike tone as though he is not currently stroking his rival off.

“mm-of course,” Gojo keens.

“‘of course’ who?” Lord Sukuna prompts, repeating the routine he loves to do with you.

“forget your own name, Sukuku? you gettin’ senile?” he pants with a grin that is equal parts lascivious and mischievous. this is bratty behavior Lord Sukuna never had to suffer from you, so you wonder with eager anticipation how he will respond.

Lord Sukuna merely tuts in response. “what a shame. whether you can accommodate all of me or not, we will have to fix that smart mouth of yours first.”

he fists a hand in Gojo’s fine white hair, easily palming his full skull as he pulls back until the blue-eyed sorcerer is looking straight up at him.

“i happen to know the best cure for a smart mouth,” Gojo says with a feral grin. he darts his tongue out and swipes it swiftly across Lord Sukuna’s swollen tip.

“get on with it, then,” Lord Sukuna growls, roughly forcing Gojo’s head onto his length. you grimace at the vigor with which Lord Sukuna rams himself down Gojo’s throat which looks so dainty to you, but he slurps eagerly on it; it seems Satoru Gojo is never one to shy away from a challenge.

watching Lord Sukuna use Gojo’s throat so mercilessly, and Gojo meeting the task with such enthusiasm, you find yourself unable to resist snaking a hand down between your legs, where you feel heat and tension building once again. as you toy with yourself, careful to remain as quiet as possible, you see Sukuna pull Gojo’s mouth from his still-hard cock with a wet pop.

“you have proven yourself to me,” he says, releasing his grip on Gojo’s hair to caress it tenderly back from his face. “and it is time for your reward.” you hold your breath; this should be a treat for you, as well.

with a grip on Gojo’s shoulders, he raises him from the bed; Gojo, still a little shaky on his legs, braces himself back against Lord Sukuna’s body. Gojo is by no means a small man, but his form is still engulfed when he is up against Lord Sukuna; you bite your lip at the thought and rub yourself faster.

Lord Sukuna reaches around Gojo to the bedside table, where you had deposited your vial of oil, and lubricates his fingers with a few drops. his hands should still be slick with all of your combined secretions, you reason, but Lord Sukuna always takes extra precautions given his immensity. then, gently bending Gojo back over, he inserts one finger. Gojo throws his head back against Lord Sukuna’s chest and groans as he gets accustomed to the feeling, and he moans outright as Lord Sukuna inserts his second finger.

the sight and sound send hot coils of pleasure through you, and you have to clap a hand to your mouth to keep yourself from mirroring the sounds Gojo is making.

“are you prepared for me to split you in half again, as you so eloquently put it?” Lord Sukuna purrs against the shell Gojo’s reddening ear.

“yes!” Gojo cries without hesitation.

“would you beg for it?” Sukuna prods, not one to give his rival what he is asking for so easily.

“please!” when Sukuna makes no moves to proceed, Gojo cries out again. “please, Lord Sukuna,” he breathes. “please make me yours.”

“good,” Lord Sukuna says, leaves a bruising bite at the nape of Gojo’s neck. “well said.” then, preparing his length and using both sets of his arms to position himself and Gojo optimally, Lord Sukuna enters him with agonizing slowness. you are unsure of whether you even thought to hold yourself back from moaning this time, but it is drowned out in any case by Gojo’s own needy vocalizations.

as he pumps in and out of Gojo, all three of you are overcome by your own pleasure, by the complicated dynamics you have brought into the medical wing and worked out in such a raw and wild way. your earlier feelings of confused irritation for Gojo dissipate as you watch his beautiful form twisting in paroxysms of pleasure; in him, you see yourself. as the two men climax at nearly the same time, scattering their pearly semen across the sheets and each other, you find yourself peaking soon after, tears streaming down your face in sheer joy.

As Lord Sukuna settles Gojo back down into the bed for him to continue his recovery, he gives him a fond pat on the head.

“you were magnificent, Satoru Gojo.”

the sorcerer gives a little self-satisfied smile before falling into a deep slumber nearly immediately, and you make a mental note to ensure that all the exertion did not compromise his healing in any way. before Lord Sukuna can turn back around, you gather your earlier discarded robe around yourself and quietly crawl back out of the room and behind the curtain, pleased with yourself for not being caught.

or so you thought.

“there is no need to exit on my account, y/n,” he calls, not turning around. you gasp before re-entering sheepishly.

“i apologize, my lord. i merely wished not to disturb you both, so i did not make myself known,” you explain rather weakly.

“i am pleased you… enjoyed yourself,” he says, finally looking over his shoulder at you with a knowing smile that makes you shiver with shame.

“you seem to have enjoyed yourself as well, my lord,” you reply; your envy of Gojo for earning Lord Sukuna’s attention is building back up, and you are unable to keep it from your voice.

“oh, y/n,” Lord Sukuna chuckles fondly, closing the space between you with long strides before he is clasping you to him.

“Satoru Gojo is a novelty.” he leans down until your mouths meet, and your breath catches.

“you, however,” he murmurs against your lips, his breath hot, “are mine. do you understand?”

“yes, my lord,” you breathe back into him, hardly daring to move.

he steps back from you first, calling for Uraume much to your confusion. the soft spoken chef, a long-time friend of yours inside the compound, appears with their characteristic quiet swiftness. much like yourself, Lord Sukuna has implicit trust in their devotion, and so often depends on them for personal tasks even beyond their formal role in the kitchen. as such, you have both built a mutual respect for one another. you nod a cordial greeting at them, which they return.

“you called for me, Lord Sukuna?” they ask with their careful diction.

“please draw a bath and get y/n cleaned up for me,” he says.

you look at him inquiringly, and he chuckles darkly, his previous tenderness all gone.

“you and your pleasure both belong to me, y/n,” he reminds you. “and i know i did not give you my permission to…enjoy the show.”

you gulp, and he turns back to Uraume.

“get her prettied up for me,” he continues with a devious grin of anticipation, “and bring her back to me so i may discipline her appropriately for her disobedience.”

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