#I was so excited when I grabbed my phone to share this epiphany

[riverofempathy]

I just had a thought about Oppenheimer, about why they used THAT line in THAT scene.

It’s because it makes us uncomfortable.

As it SHOULD. Because out of context, what does that line sound like? “I am become death, destroyer of worlds?”

It’s iconic. It’s cool.

But it’s not. Becoming responsible for hundreds of thousands of people’s deaths is not cool. It’s horrific. It’s disturbing. It’s something that should haunt us for the rest of time.

It certainly haunted Oppenheimer.

That’s the whole point! Of the whole movie! And they didn’t even go as far as they could have. They could have and should have shown the devastation and death within the Navajo people in New Mexico. They’re STILL getting sick to this day!

And yet we still have people today who firmly believe that dropping those bombs on Nagasaki and Hiroshima was the right thing to do. And yet they mourn for the people who died at Pearl Harbor. As if people who die in your own country deserve to be mourned more than those who die in another country. As if those people don’t also have families who wanted them to come home. As if they don’t also believe in fighting for their country, the one that they happened to be born in, which you also could have happened to be born in, if the universe had shifted slightly. And you could have been on their side, mourning their people because they were yours.

It’s all a stupid game. It’s just a tangled web of lies, carefully constructed to fit whatever perspective of the side you’re born on. And we’re never going to get out of it if we keep thinking that war is necessary, that violence is necessary, that we have to protect ourselves against our enemies. But our “enemies” think the same thing about us. And they’re people, too. They think they’re right, too. They want to protect their families, too.

So it’s never gonna end. Unless we ALL work together to make things better, to be empathetic, to see everybody as human, everybody as worth protecting.

And it starts… with getting a little uncomfortable.

[priniya]

🖇️ THE STORY OF US

synopsis. when minho comes back to kiss after the winter break he’s not only surprised to see kitty back, but also a girl she introduced as her new roommate, who at the same time was a girl minho used to be head over heels for.

notes. minho (xo kitty) x reader. i haven’t published anything, xo kitty became my epiphany (fr)

all minho wanted after taking a sixteen hour flight from los angeles to seoul was just to take a nap as soon as he get to his dorm, well, meeting his roommates in the meantime, but sleep was all he wanted. definitely not to see kitty song covey, laying in one of the couches talking so rapidly about…

…whatever kitty could talk about. he focused himself on here for less than a second, and his gaze caught something so familiar, yet so unknown. then, when you parted your lips to answer a question asked by q, he connected all the possible dots. you were the girl he was put up in the same room with, when multiple schools were staying at the same hotel. minho seemed like a total douchebag, just like you’d assume a son of a famous actress would act, nevertheless, since the staff couldn’t really do anything particular to change the rooms, he was… a nice guy.

however, while bonding at the trip, you fell out of touch immediately after as you decided to not share each other’s contacts, so you could meet up in future life if your friendship and… quite more, was meant to be. it was his idea, you were eager to stay in touch as you grow on him in those four weeks.

your new roommate smiled at him, probably excited to see him. “i’m back!” she exclaimed melodically, grabbing your arm in between. “i think yuri pulled some strings, and this is my new roommate, she just transfered. we’ll be living in the boys building, we’re neighbours!” she added, too happy to notice the boy’s shock on his face.

“oh, my god.” he started, but covey quickly interrupted him with a roll of eyes and “i don’t care what you’re gonna say. im exhilarated to be back.” though minho was too focused on you to even listen to your american roommate.

“hi, minho.” you spoke so softly, you could see he almost died. without wasting any more time, q has suggested to let you guys talk alone as it was so obvious you two knew each other. he replied in low voice, clearly not believing his own eyes. “so good to see you again.” a smile rosed on your lips, when his arms were wrapped around your posture.

reuniting with him was unexpected as you never thought you’d see him again, and you believed the plan you set was a complete absurd. you tried reaching out, but he was a son of a star, how could you possibly achieve that? now, it just felt like a scene from a movie, where two lovers finds each other after a long time, although you weren’t really lovers – or were you?

that night you barely had any sleep, you sneaked out of your dorms, and he showed you around, while catching up on almost everything. it wasn’t a lie that something between you has stayed the same, the same butterflies in your stomach when your hands accidentaly touched, the same lovestruck looks, the same way you held hands, the only thing that wasn’t as it used to be was your ages and appearance.

you were standing at your doorstep, when he put his phone number into your phone. “thank you so much for tonight, minho.” you stood on your toes. “i think i missed you.” you whispered with a smug, before leaving a soft kiss on his blushed cheek. without letting him respond, you walked into the room.

minhoe: pls, don’t do me like that

minhoe: come back here and kiss me

a part of you really wanted to be true, but the other decided that you’d just make a fool out of yourself, so you just trail back to your room, slight regret appearing in the back of your head.

the next few weeks looked almost the same — the school were so hard you spent it on studying for most of your free time, which caused minho to think you were avoiding him, when in reality you were tutored by yuri and juliana. “minho’s been asking ‘bout you, quite a lot, you know?” han started.

“bugging our asses for half the lunch break.” juliana added, braiding your hair as the soft tunes of frank ocean played from her speaker. “told us you guys almost kissed…?” her eyebrow’s shot up, scanning your face in the mirror for any signs of embarrassment.

“i mean we did kiss a few years ago at the summer camp, but not now.” you shrugged, not hiding the blush that crept on your face. “don’t look so shocked! we were a camp couple, but he wanted to be sappy and said if the universe wants us together, it’ll let us meet each other again.”

“that’s romantic, isn’t it?” kitty rolled on the bed to face you and juliana. “i mean, you really gotta believe you’re soulmates if you risk something so valuable.” she sighed, smiling softly. “you two remind me of my sister and her boyfriend, lara and peter.”

you frowned, thinking about her words for a minute. was it so valuable or did he just want to have a moment of peace? did he even think about you during the few years you’ve been apart? well, you thought about him, but did he about you? it was your first time in a week that you’d see minho, and ever since the day one, he’s been somehow flirting with you, so you were quite nervous.

you never said you liked him out loud, not because you didn’t (maybe ‘cos first love is the one you’ll always remember), but because katherine would decide to use her matchamaking skills on you. you wanted it to come out naturally, just like back then. your relationship with minho was incredibly special to you, it was something no one could take away from you.

now, you were just trying to look decent. you were going out with him and dae, being asked out so suddenly you couldn’t refuse. you were quite sure that dae’s presence there was just to get you out of the room, and then disappear. you wore a white, flowery summer dress that yuri borrowed you a few days ago, your make up was light and the braids looked cute.

“should i be nervous?” you asked, fixing a few things on your face, before the clock has been the closest to the final minute. a knock on the door was heard from the beginning of hallway. “yeah, it shows you actually care.” yuri’s girlfriend smiled at you as you flattened the fabric of your dress.

minho was breathless, last time he’d seen you in a dress was back at camp, during the last day when you just wanted the boy to remember you as well as he could. “uh, hey.” he uttered, eyes you in shock. “you look, woah, gorgeous.”

just as you expected, dae, who showed up late, didn’t stay with you for longer than ten minutes, saying he needed to see kitty, with whom you were earlier, so it was just the two of you. minho offered you an airpod as you walked down the street to the park, his fingers wrapped around the handle. it was the first time you had been alone with him in weeks, as someone was always near, whether it was q and florian, dae and kitty, juliana and yuri or everyone separately.

“i wanted to find you sometimes, y’know?” you began, leaning onto his arms, when you finally sat down. “what? then why didn’t you? i really hoped you’d do it.” his head fell delicately on your, fingers intertwining themselves with yours.

“well, your mom’s a famous actress, i wouldn’t even be able to text you so… i just followed you on insta.” you shrugged softly, not wanting him to change his position. “and it was your idea to come up with something like this, losing you broke me in half, really. my parents even reached out to your mom.” his face lightened up with shock and confusion, nevertheless he let you continue.

“but her manager or whoever said that hundreds of people call just to say their daughters are your friends, so… i guess the call wasn’t forwarded?” minho groaned, annoyed. he’d give up everything to just have you by his side, when his mom and dad were splitting up.

“i am so sorry y/n.” a sigh left his lips. “i’ll regret that stupid decision till the end of my days, really.” he’d talk and talk, and talk if you didn’t do what you did.

when the soft tunes of lana del rey’s song was replaced by the starting notes of “there is a light that never goes out” by the smiths, you turned around to face him, and after putting your hands on his cheeks you kissed him. his lips moved so godly against yours, you almost melted into his touch. with that, your friendly hangout turned into a date — not that you didn’t think of it earlier, but now it was confirmed. it was a definite date.

when you came back, the living space was empty so… considering you had half an hour before curfew, you decided to snog a little more, while watching a movie. his arm around your waist, your head on his shoulder, a bowl of snacks resting on his thigh. beside that, you didn’t even think about kitty, and what her reaction might be if she came back. now it was just you, minho and your rosing relationship.

[notnctu]

POV | PART TWO

━ ❝ i’d love to see me from your point of view.❞

❀ lee donghyuck x fem!reader ❀ genre - slow burn, fluff! angst, (optional smut is marked with ****) ❀ details - best friends to lovers!au, college!au, ft. best friend mark, slice of life?, inspo by pov by ariana grande ❀ word count - 6.1k ❀ warnings - swearing, dangerous reckless behavior, fingering, penetration, public?sex?, unprotected, slight dirty talk ❀ synopsis - Donghyuck gradually falls in love with you, his best friend, through unprecedented intimate moments that reveal more than what meets the eye and a drunken shared kiss on your birthday makes him realize how hard he’s fallen for you. You’re oblivious to it all, trying to indulge and seek a one true love through bad tinder hookups or men you meet at the club, all to only end in self doubt that Donghyuck has to reconcile. And he always tells you what you need to hear, while also leaving out the part where he so badly wishes you can love yourself the way he loves you.

❀ a/n - make sure you read the first part as it’s a continuation! please please leave me feedback, i would really appreciate it :) this is going to be my last long fic for the time being! thanks for dealing with my spam for the past few weeks after months no of writings <3

READ PART ONE

Donghyuck thought about that kiss every night since it happened, yet knowing you didn’t do the same. How unfortunate it was, when he panicked waking next to you in the morning and wondering if you were to confront him about it. However, there was nothing, no follow up. You didn’t remember it and he couldn’t tell if the sigh that left his mouth that morning was out of relief or despair. 

Regardless, that became his epiphany and the more his love for you grew, the more he wished to be around you for all his days. Donghyuck jumped at every text message, picking up the phone to see if it was you and noting the disappointment in his heart whenever it wasn’t. He found himself smiling whenever your name was brought up, fondly thinking of how you make his heart race. 

The moments that you were together, he swears on every universe that he’s the happiest he’s ever been. There’s something about you that makes him want to believe in love, and it’s not because of your unrealistic desires to find one. As selfish as he came to be, he wanted you all to himself and to be the sole reason behind your smiles.

“No Mark?” Asking as you hop into Donghyuck’s car, the clock on his dash reading the red digital numbers 2:12 A.M. 

“Why can’t we just hang out for once?” He whines, but hopes that it’s playful enough to where you can’t tell that he’s actually serious. Donghyuck hears your melodic chuckle and everything inside him rumbles with glee and satisfaction. 

He steals quick peeks over at you in the passenger seat, greedily taking in your appearance. “That’s not exactly how a throuple works, but I’ll let it pass. Mark never has time for us anyways.” 

There is something so intimate about the late nights; the outside world is dead in its sleep and vulnerable to chaos. The streets are completely empty and it truly feels as if it’s you two against the city. It brings no regulations, easy escapes, staying up all night to feel something the day can’t give you. 

You are the perfect person to spend them with. You’re the very definition of a good feeling, where he’s forgetting all his bad days and soaring through the heavens. The most accurate human form of excitement, the adrenaline and sweetest thrills that run throughout his body. 

“There’s something I’ve always wanted to do…” As Donghyuck pulls into a gas station parking lot, the small convenient store is brightly lit with a blinding white sign that reads a popular chain establishment. 

Hyuck blinks at you curiously, head tilt and waiting for you to finish your sentence. Getting out of the car, you stand on your toes and rest your chin on the roof of his car to speak directly to him, “you know that big intersection over on 34th Boulevard?” He catches the mischievous twinkle that shines in your eyes and a grin so fearless fits your face perfectly.

He nods, spinning his car keys on his finger and walking up to the store. But he’s looking back at you with eyes that ask for you to proceed with him, and you’re running towards him with a sudden youthful energy and a jump in your step. 

Your hand latches onto his arm and his gaze drops momentarily to follow it, “I’ve always wanted to just run down the middle of it. To run down a busy traffic area when it’s empty, knowing that this would be the only opportunity to do it without getting run over.” 

“Is that what you’re suggesting we should do next?” Hyuck opens the fridge and grabs his favorite prepackaged ice cream cone. Your grip on his sleeve tightens, your dazzling eyes never leaving his.

He hands you a random popsicle and you take it mindlessly, your train of thought still trying to convince Hyuck to embark on achieving this new thrill of yours. “If you didn’t have anything else planned…”

“Am I some Fairy Godmother? Granting your wishes to come true?” Using sarcasm to hide his undying desire to scream yes! may be the best thing he’s learned to utilize. However, you don’t need to beg any more when a small smile curves at his lips. He’s more than convinced.

“Ah, a happy couple. You two look great together.” The rather talkative cashier compliments while he rings up the icey treats. 

Just before Hyuck can clarify, you’re pulling him closer by the arm and using your fake saccharine smile. “The best boyfriend ever!” His throat freezes, but he’s following your lead closely. Confusion wandering his thoughts, but heart swelling at your usage of the word boyfriend to reference him. 

The friendly stranger laughs wholeheartedly at your giddy act, completely falling for your overplayed nature of a lovey dovey girlfriend. “He always buys me what I want, like this ice cream. He knows it’s my favorite.” You blink innocently up at him, but he finally understands your malicious motive.

Shooting a glare at you, he complies silently and pulls out his card to pay for both of your treats. “Right. Anything my baby wants.” He says the pet name so easily that it shocks him a bit. 

“Hey, you’re a good man.” The clueless cashier smiles even wider and prints the receipt. With a simple gratitude, you both exit the store and you’re laughing the loudest form of mockery.

Jumping into the car, Hyuck is quick to roll his eyes. “He always buys me what I want.” He imitates your previous statement with a silly voice. “I can’t believe you robbed me.” 

The ridiculous scheme actually managed to work, leaving your stomach to hurt from the intense fit of giggles. “My baby? Where did you learn that?” You say between your spurts of laughter.

Heat rises up his neck, slightly embarrassed. “So what? Nicknames are cute.” He admits bashfully, while shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly. 

Your chuckles die down and you’re leaning over the middle console to get a closer look of his expression. “Really? Didn’t think you were the type. You never used them with your exes.” 

“Around you.” A cringe runs down your spine when you witness Hyuck bite his ice cream, settling back in your seat with a grumble.

“Pet names in private.” Now, his palms grow a bit slick with perspiration. “That’s endearing.” Unwrapping your melting popsicle, you don’t probe him more about the subject. Instead, Hyuck turns up the stereo to drown out any more talk about romantic gestures.

After several rounds of finding street parking, Hyuck finally swerves into a spot situated just before the large six-way intersection. The traffic lights blink in view at the end of the street and in the darkness, there are no cars around. An unfamiliar scene, this place is nothing but a wide open road with five lanes that meet in the middle and lead to six different directions. The white painted lines that divide up the road are as chaotic as it looks during the day filled with traffic.

Nonetheless, you are right. There is no other chance to see it so dead, so empty, so free. 

And you’re already hopping out of the car that Hyuck breaks his daydream and hurries after you. Standing the middle of the road is a dangerous scheme, yet these are the thrill seeking moments that you crave too well. 

Extending your arm out and your palm facing the night sky, you grin enticingly at Hyuck to join you in the middle of the chaotic lines and the adrenaline picks up within him. He, too, matches your smile and lets every form of enthusiasm fuel him. 

“Race you to the end.” Hyuck begins bolting down the long runway, causing you to scoff in disbelief at his sudden challenge. 

The wind that takes flight against his body is crisp on his skin and driving his strands into a wild mess. Turning around, he sees that you’re quick on his tail. However, the one thing that catches his eye… the one thing that makes this moment another one of your most beautiful ones is the utter bliss and peace in your facial expression. 

Eyes are closed and arms are spread out as if you’re letting the wind carry you away. The air slips between the spaces of your fingers and the night is filled with nothing, but your gentle out of breath giggles. 

Donghyuck stops in his tracks right under the colorful traffic lights at your astonishing image. And if you are to open your eyes, you’ll see the marvelous image of your sun waiting for you in the middle of the largest intersection of the city with his mouth slightly agape and marked under a trance.

An exasperated sigh escapes as a puff of smoke and his heart works extra hard to pump oxygen in his veins. In his perspective, the excellent city skyline at the horizon remains your background and you’re running toward him with a breathless joy. Another splitting breathtaking image that will live in his mind for as long as he knows you.

So he throws caution to the wind and though it feels too good to be true, he loves his best friend more than anyone he’s ever come across.

By the end of your rendezvous, you two find a secret rooftop to fully enjoy your silent city. Standing side by side, you both lean with your elbows on the ledge. 

There is something so unspoken and intimate about this very moment, where existing in each other’s presences becomes wholly more comfortable than anything in the world. And this safety allows for vulnerable secrets to spill, for questions that your heart has always been afraid to ask to fall from your lips. 

But you’re not here with just anybody. Donghyuck probably knew what was already on your mind, he just needed you to speak them into existence.

“Hyuck, do you think I’m unlovable?” 

Perhaps, it’s the intimacy that allows for him to talk more confidently about how he views you. Heart over mind, he scoffs in disbelief. “Absolutely not. You’re the most lovable person I know! From your happy giggles to your overall easy going aura. We’re not perfect people, but you’re worth every glance and every praise. I wanted to be with you the very moment you made me laugh.” 

Donghyuck passionately rambles on about your attributes and everything you’ve allowed him to experience over the years of your friendship. While he’s always been there for you, you’re always by his side and making sure he’s living a memorable life. He thanks all his sweetest memories to you, that you are the most impactful person of his entire college experience.

“I came to college thinking I’d have my nose in textbooks all day long, but you fell into my life like an opportunity to escape. I love my nights trying to crush Mark on the leaderboards, but I’d give that up any day to run down a major intersection in the middle of the city with you.” 

With a playful soft chuckle, you say something that practically makes his heart stop and regret oversharing. “You know, from how you describe me… it almost sounds like you’re in love with me.”

“Maybe I am.” He bites the inside of his cheek, unsure what suddenly overcame him. His heartbeat pounds in his ears and he’s anticipating your response, trying every way to decipher the quizzical look on your face. Nevertheless, your hesitation causes him to panic and he intercepts before you can respond. “I meant that as your friend.” 

His heart drops into the pit of his stomach, gaze averting away from you. Lies. Lies. More fucking lies. He should’ve waited to see what you would’ve said. 

Nodding knowingly, you lightly place your hand over his. The warmth of your touch soothes his aching and disappointment. Why is he hurting from a simple look? “I know.” He can’t tell what’s worse, the fact that you truly believe he only loves you as a friend or that you saw right through him and are trying to let him save face. 

“Something happened the night of your birthday that I think I should tell you.” Hyuck sighs out all his frustrations. 

He pulls his hand from underneath yours, “you asked me to kiss you as a birthday favor.” There is no confidence to watch your reaction, his eyes remain focused on the dark city. 

Instead of a painstaking rejection, you laugh wholeheartedly and somehow, he feels much lighter. “And did you?”

“How could I say no to you on your birthday?” Peering over, your fingers softly graze your lips and a wandering look is present in your dazed stare.

“It’s not the first time we’ve kissed, Hyuck.” Smiling at him, Hyuck looks cluelessly at you and doesn’t recall another time. He would’ve remembered. 

“Guess who I stole that same request from?” Your eye lashes bat firmly at him and he gulps at your implied question. There was no way.

“Me? When?” This all causes him to rack his brain of lost files, something he must’ve missed.

Sighing, you bid him a kind smile. “Your birthday party a few months ago. Drunk out of your living mind, you pulled me privately into the kitchen and asked if I could kiss you as a birthday gift.” 

Fuck, no wonder why he couldn’t remember. He didn’t remember a single thing from that night. “It was right after my break up.” 

Nodding, you affirm his realization. “You told me that you felt so lonely, and somehow…. someway… I’ve always made you feel seen. Perhaps, you do the same for me and my drunk ass was bold enough to ask for a similar request.” 

But did you kiss him as if you loved him? With the same amount of love that he did the night of your birthday? 

Nonetheless, you shrug off the topic and move on from it all. “We should go, the sun comes up in a few.” 

Hyuck notes this odd detail. You’re not one to end the nights so abruptly, so it almost seemed as if you didn’t want to speak more about it. 

Perhaps, you did kiss him like you meant it but every fear in your body about loving your best friend stops you from admitting it all. 

Because you shouldn’t love your best friend, but something deep down has always wanted to.

How ridiculous he was to believe that you could ever possibly share the same feelings as him. How foolish he felt the moment you burst into his apartment announcing how you’ve finally found the one after another random Tinder date. 

It’s as the night on the rooftop a week ago didn’t even exist or mean anything to you. But that night ate him up alive, to the point where he sought out love counseling from Mark.

“Oh dude, this is serious.” Mark watches Hyuck pace the room, double around the floorplan with his head in his hands with utter frustration and confusion. You’re the only thing that’s been running through his mind the last few days. 

He grunts and rolls his eyes at how Mark’s face had fallen sullen. “I practically confessed everything I loved about her. It’s pretty serious.”

Mark stands and stops Hyuck by the shoulders, looking dead into his eyes. “I’ve liked her before too and would have done some dumb act to get her to like me back. I get it, Hyuck. So, what do you want to do?”

Donghyuck initially scoffs and tears away from his best friend’s intense stare, “of course you liked her too.” His voice fades out at the end of his sentence. “Mark, I like her so much it’s hard to look at anyone else. She’s…”

“Mesmerizing?” Mark finishes his sentence with a small proud grin on his lips. 

Hyuck couldn’t hold the ridiculous laugh that escapes at how smug Mark looks, but then a silence falls over him. He realizes how perfect that word is to describe you. You are every dazzling trance he’d fawn under. 

“It’s wrong, Mark. She’s our best friend, I can’t ruin us.” Hyuck slumps his shoulders forward and a pout extends. His eyes are wandering the ugly carpet but he’s thinking about every moment you’ve smiled. 

“How did this happen in the first place? I thought you never would’ve liked her…” Mark’s question has Hyuck raking his brain to find his epiphany. “It’s not about your ex, is it? y/n is way too good to be a rebound.” 

“No. This has nothing to do with my old relationships, I genuinely like her… so much.” Hyuck understands the implications in Mark’s sudden abrasive questions. Even it’s difficult for himself to say how it all started and so this has Donghyuck reflecting back on his entire friendship with you.

If only he had noticed your lively smiles sooner, a little earlier, it would have saved him all this time searching for someone who would last. You’ve lasted through every college relationship he’s had and that speaks louder than any confession. 

“I never liked her because I never thought I had a chance. Have you seen her? Our best friend who has 400 matches on Tinder.” Though he blames himself for realizing a little late that he loved you, it was always hard to compete with everyone else. 

“So, what changed then?” 

Hyuck leans against the door to Mark’s room and crosses his arms to contemplate. “Not that I have a chance now, but I can’t hold these feelings back anymore. I want to kiss her until we’re out of breath, to love without any conditions, to be the reason behind her every beautiful moment.” 

Mark raises a confused eyebrow, “but you are.”

“The only reason.” Hyuck speaks his truest desires and Mark coughs aggressively before composing himself. Right, he didn’t stutter one bit. 

So, Hyuck had planned to confess, all until you gave him the very reason he couldn’t. When you showed up unannounced with one of those wide grins that has your eyes shimmering with hope, he just knew something was wrong. All his love and future aspirations were replaced with sheer disappointment and envy.

“I’m falling hard for him.” You begin and your hands are clasped together so innocently. “He brought me to this overlook on a cliff and we just talked for ages. It felt so right and then, he asked to see me again!” Your eyes are completely wondrous and distracted, like the one thought in your mind blocked out everything else. Jumping happily, you’re squealing with excitement thinking about this new person in your life and there is no consideration of Hyuck’s silence.

“That’s… great.” He barely stutters to fill the air and to replace the sound of his heart breaking. He lost you before even getting the chance to even have you. 

“I know right!” You yell joyfully and though your smile is the biggest it's ever been, Hyuck refuses to see this moment as beautiful. He’s no longer looking at you objectively, his bias tainting it all and he sees it in an ugly light. As your best friend, he should be happy for you and rooting for you. He’s known more than anyone else that you have been waiting for someone like this your whole college experience.

However, he can’t feel a single good emotion as you ramble on about your alleged one true love.

“Did you need something?” He cuts you off, growing a bit irritated by your endless praise about a man who never wishes to meet.

Clearing your throat, you take Hyuck’s hand in both of your palms. With begging eyes, you say, “my sister is getting married this weekend and they invited you. 

His hold escapes yours as he walks toward his bedroom, “shouldn’t you invite your new man to your family events now.” It’s difficult for him to hide the bitterness in his voice, but you run up to him and grip his arm. 

“But they think I’m dating you, remember? Plus, my mom referred to you by name. She really likes you.” You snicker, clearly not understanding why Donghyuck seems to be rather distant at the moment.

His ears perk up at the compliment and though it’s a selfish thought, he feels content knowing that he was able to win over your family. So, his heart burns at how your hand slowly travels down to intertwine with his own and how your chin rests on his shoulder lightly. His head turns and he is met a few inches away from your tender lips. For a brief moment, he’s staring at them longer than he should. 

“Come on, Hyuck. Be mine for one more time.” Your whisper is gentle and soft, your breath tickling against his cheek. Despite everything, he loves how you make him feel. It’s always a mixture of happiness and safety. There are no fears with you because you’re absolutely fearless. He can’t imagine how he would’ve opened up without you around, that he puts every form of trust into you. 

So, every little thing that you do. every single passing look. every touch and every spoken word. He falls harder for you every time you simply see him, every time you bat your eyelashes at him. And this love that festers inside of him feels easy and genuine. Perhaps, you’ve been his one true love all along. He’s never felt remarkably seen, where every part is exposed and right at your fingertips. 

And you… have been so patiently waiting for just anyone to steal your heart. How can he let just anyone love you? 

“I’m yours for however long you want me to be.” He lightly ruffles the top of your hair before slightly shrugging you off, afraid that your hold will eventually have him saying other sweet implications. “But don’t expect me to enjoy it.” He smirks at your small chuckle, the roll in your eyes.

“At least pretend.” But he really doesn’t have to. He enjoys every moment being yours. 

When the day finally arrived, the grand wedding may have been another day that Hyuck will never forget how beautiful you looked. Prancing out in your bridesmaid dress, you run towards him through the large field of fake grass. He catches you when you jump into his arms, practically failing all over and tripping over the ends of your chiffon dress. He hits the ground, cushioning your fall. 

“Hey..” you grin down at him breathless, hand resting perfectly on his chest as it was the night of your 21st again.

Hyuck gulps and sends you a glare, “I should have dropped you.” 

“That would have been very chivalrous of you.” Sarcasm bites back at him as you push up and off of him. He’s quick on his feet and brushing off any dust from the bottom of your expensive dress, avoiding the long open slit that runs down to expose one leg.

“Donghyuck, you’re looking ravishing.” Your mother steps out, tall and prideful, but with the most delightful expression as she opens her arms to invite him into a hug. 

He leans into it, while cautiously making suspicious eye contact with you. You shrug back, also confused at why your mother has a sudden change in demeanor. “It’s been so long since the holidays.”

“It’s a pleasure to see you again.” He bids your mother a respectful smile when she pulls away, to which she absolutely fawns at and you’re tugging at his sleeve to drag him away.

“The pleasure is all mine. You make y/n a better person.” And there is no context that Hyuck understands this single phrase before he’s walking away from your force. Your mother waves a small sweet goodbye as she watches you two leave behind a cobblestone wall behind the large reception building.

It’s covered in long vines that grow up the old stones, a beautiful background for an outdoor wedding. “Rude.” He whispers when you finally stop pulling him away.

“She was starting to say odd things.” You laugh, quite nervously actually. Nonetheless, you shake out of your nerves and a beaming expression replaces your troubles. “So, guess what? I’m meeting my man afterwards.” Yet again, the curve of your lips at the thought of another rumbles his own yearning heart.

Shoving his hands into his pockets, he looks down while kicking at the loose pebbles on the ground. “Good for you.” grumbles Donghyuck mindlessly.

You don’t notice his low spirits again, you’re talking away about this man as if he’s all you’re consumed with nowadays. On and on, the same speech about how you’re practically ready to give it your all and how he fits someone unimaginable. Eventually, Donghyuck becomes fed up by how your eyes blink up to the sun with another reflection in them. “It’s like you forget who you are when you’re with someone new.” 

And you’re in mid-ramble when you hear his harsh comment that picks aggressively at your skin. It stings, “what?” You cross your arms defensively and raise an eyebrow at him. The tone in your voice is jarringly upset and he opened a can of worms that he isn’t ready for.

Donghyuck swears underneath his breath, looking away at the tall trees behind the small parking lot. “Forget it.” He mumbles, rather frustrated at himself for ticking you off.

“What are you implying?” 

“There is someone that actually makes you a better person rather than someone completely different.” He scoffs, his emotions fueling the worst of him. The words flow from his mouth full of anger and spitefulness. 

Your eyes narrow at him, crossing your arms defensively. “Like you can give me the love you think I deserve? This whole fake boyfriend gimmick has gone too much to your head.”

And his heart is bursting at the seams and all he can see is your angry expression, so he says something he never hopes to regret. Every impulse beats his rationality and in the heat of the moment, Donghyuck confesses, “if only you can see yourself from my point of view and all the emotions I feel when I look at you.” 

With a sharp intake of breath, you’re slightly shocked at his bold statement. You blink cluelessly at him, speechless and deciphering how to respond. The anger fades from the both of you, knowing that the connection you two possess is mutual. Somewhere deep down within you, a light switches on and you’re basking in your sun’s radiance in this moment. 

“Tell me about it.” Your curiosity brings much confusion, but he doesn’t wait a second of hesitation. 

“Happiness, you light up my nights in dark cars with your smile. Trust, there is no one else I’d run down a dangerous intersection with. Courage, being bold enough to dance in a crowded room like no one was watching. Love, when kissing you felt incomparable to anything else in the world. Vulnerability, looking at you and knowing everything about you.” 

Donghyuck takes a cautious step forward toward you. A whirl of thoughts and emotions overwhelmingly flood your heavy mind, but fear no longer holds you back from the one person you’ve always wished to love, harder than any person you’ve ever encountered. “Donghyuck.” 

He freezes at the call of his name, waiting patiently for your next words. “I want to love me the way that you love me... because nobody loves me like you do… even myself. So, I’d love to see me from your point of view.” 

Donghyuck releases the sigh that suffocates him and every firework lights up in his chest. His eyes wander across your canvas and absorb everything wondrous about your features. Even though you’re not entirely smiling, you’re puckering your lips cutely out of embarrassment. And he reassesses how pretty you simply look in your expensive formal chiffon dress and the bold color on your lips that has made you feel good before. 

He thinks aloud, the words leaving his mouth before they can be stopped. “This is your most beautiful moment.” 

When you’re looking up at him to meet his dreamy gaze, a new enthusiasm washes over your entire body. Looking rather inexplicably attractive in his suit, Hyuck stares at you as if you’re all he can see. So, you pull him into the only source of gratitude you can give. A kiss that gives every emotion back to him, one that resembles closely to the one he gave you on your birthday and the one you gave him for his. 

An emotional kiss that tells him more than he can see. He feels it on the tip of your tongue and every ounce of love that rushes over the both of you.

***********

Donghyuck’s wandering hands travel down your waist, over your hips, all until it reaches in between the slit of your dress. His hand instinctively grips at your naked thigh, the feeling of your raw skin driving him wild with impure thoughts. Your hands are quick on his tie, loosening it from around his collar and unbuttoning the first few as you’ve done once before.

“Can,-- Is it okay if--?” Hungry eyes search his face for confirmation, but you’re so lust driven that you’re a stuttering mess. “Do you want this?” 

“Yes.” Says Hyuck without any hesitation. Taking his hand, you’re quick to lead him inside to a more secluded part of the venue. The lavish private bathrooms are brightly lit and he lifts you on top of the marble counters.

“The reception starts in 20 minutes.” You moan as Hyuck kisses down your neck hastily, a hand up the slit of your dress to push your panties aside.

“We’ll make it quick then. I’ll show you love another day.” His knuckle lightly grazes against your erect clit and your grip on his shoulder tightens. Whimpers fall from your lips as your hips mindlessly grind into his hand. “Never took you the type to be so loud.” Hyuck raises an eyebrow and tilts his head mockingly at you.

“This isn’t even close to how loud I can get.” Your statement causes him to swallow hard. Being your best friend, he has kept a rather clear mind from any sexual attraction toward you. He had to know he loved you in order to even see you in that way. 

Gathering your slick, he rubs your clit with two fingers before dipping them into your hole. You lean back into the mirror and prop your feet on the counter to spread open for Hyuck to see. “You let all these idiots fuck your pretty pussy? They don’t deserve you, as a person or a potential partner.” He fingers you deeper and with flicking motions, he hits your sweet spot and causes you to jolt.

“Please, just fuck me. I’ve always wondered how good you’d feel.” His eyes twinkle at your bashful confession, but understands your lustful desires even for your own best friend.

“You think about fucking me?” He asks abruptly, taking his fingers out to suck your juices clean from them. A coined flattered smirk appears on his lips as he unbuckles his belt.

You’re averting eye contact, “well no, maybe just once. I get horny when I’m drunk sometimes.” You admit and he’s rushing to take himself out of his restrictive dress pants. His dick hits the air and he adjusts closer to your dripping core.

And he enters, slowly and slowly inching in so you can adhere to his size. You bite back every yell of pleasure and grip the ends of his dress shirt. Hyuck fills you up deliciously, and you two are connected through bodies beyond any way before. He leans in to give you a sloppy, yet passionate kiss before dragging out his hips and pushing them back in.

There is no guilt, no pain, no sorrows. Knowing Hyuck, he fucks you in the same way he wishes to love you. His hips drive into you passionately and quickly. The time crunch being something that causes him great distraction, but his heart is swelling simply feeling your warmth wrap around him so well.

“My baby is so tight.” Pet names in private. A small grin appears on your face at the sound of the sweet nickname and you pull him closer by tugging his shirt.

“Harder, Hyuck. Don’t hold back anymore.” Moan after moan, Hyuck relentlessly drills into you. His arm is hooked underneath your left thigh to keep it up, and your head keeps banging against the mirror.

Your eyes roll back when his thumb rubs circles on your aching clit. The mixture of both pleasures stimulate you until the build up tension in your stomach begins to reach its peak.

“Cum, I know you fucking want to.” He grunts, keeping the same rhythm that pushes you over your edge. Your walls squeeze around him tightly as your legs shake sporadically from your release. You’re smart to cover your mouth, knowing that the bathroom will only echo your erotic sounds. Your chest rises and falls from the momentum and adrenaline that Hyuck helped you reach, breathlessly trying to calm your heart rate down.

After a few more harsh bumps, he pulls out and motions you forward. Jumping off of the counter, you kneel on the ground and suck his tip lightly. Your swirls are enough for him to empty into your mouth, his hot streams of salty liquid hitting the back of your throat. He looks down at you and your wide eyed expression with his cock in your mouth drives him overboard. 

And you swallow, getting up to lightly plant a sweet kiss on his cheek. A lip stain being worn proudly for just a moment. 

“You amaze me.” Hyuck whispers, holding you against his flushed body and fast paced heart beat. 

“Hurry out you two!” A voice startles the both of you with a knock on the door and you two are quick to readjust yourselves. He hopes to love you a little longer next time, without any interruptions.

***********

After the glorious and excruciating long wedding, you’re walking Hyuck to his car in the small parking lot. During the rest of the night, he held your hand the whole way through and the love that he looked at you with was more than real. 

He talked with your distant relatives as if he’s always known them. Hyuck conducted the dinner table, always knowing what to say. There was no doubt in your head that seeing Donghyuck in the aftermath, he was always going to be someone who was going to make things better. 

The love you long searched for, the love that you had been too afraid to touch, intertwined itself so lovingly underneath the white table cloth. Donghyuck is the one and it took needing to see him a bit more to realize. A little more acceptance from the both of you had to be the final straw.

Donghyuck sheepishly scratches the back of his neck when you reach his car, unsure where the path of your friendship will diverge to next. “Have fun on your date then…” His voice trails off, kicking the rocks at his feet again.

There goes your melodic laughter that soothe his aching heart and the familiar gentle grip on his fingertips. You lift his chin up, the both of you seeing each other clearly now.

From his perspective, you’re absolutely dazzling in the low light and butterflies swirl in the pit of his stomach. He can look at you forever, until months turn into years. He can love you until you two grow old. You’re his fearless, beautiful, inexplicably marvelous best friend. And he patiently waits for the day you’ll let him finally be yours.

From your perspective, Donghyuck shines even when the night overtakes the sky and possibly, the warmth in your heart bubbles across your chest. You can stay with him forever, until months turn into years. You can trust him like it’s you two against the world. He is your silly, charming, timidly benevolent best friend. And you’re slowly falling and hoping for the day you get to be his. 

“I’m not going to see him anymore. He’s not the one.” Hyuck blinks at you, full of confusion and shock.

“But you sounded so happy.” His voice gets lost in the stillness of the intimate atmosphere. 

“No, Hyuck. You make me happy and I’ll say it again for you to hear me. Nobody loves me like you do.” Reaching up, your hand caresses his cheek and he falls into your palm lovingly. His heart runs a mile, reaching the greatest high he’s ever going to feel. He hopes his eyes don’t deceive him, but the utter perfection on your face makes him feel whole.

You wish that Hyuck can teach you to love yourself the way that he loves you. 

“Take me home?” 

“How could I ever say no?”

thank you for being patient with me! its finally done and i will be going on a writing hiatus for a bit. housemating and ridin club will come out sometime soon, but i really need to step away from writing for a bit. please understand, thank you for reading :) 

[bananaofswifts]

By Paul Tingen

From sketches to final mixes, engineer Jonathan Low spent 2020 overseeing Taylor Swift’s hit lockdown albums folklore and evermore.

“I think the theme of a lot of my work nowadays, and especially with these two records, is that everything is getting mixed all the time. I always try to get the songs to sound as finalised as they can be. Obviously that’s hard when you’re not sure yet what all the elements will be. Tracks morph all the time, and yet everything is always moving forwards towards completion in some way. Everything should sound fun and inspiring to listen to all the time.”

Speaking is Jonathan Low, and the two records he refers to are, of course, Taylor Swift’s 2020 albums folklore and evermore, both of which reached number one in the UK and the US. Swift’s main producer and co‑writer on the two albums was the National’s Aaron Dessner, also interviewed in this issue. Low is the engineer, mixer and general right‑hand man at Long Pond Studios in upstate New York, where he and Dessner spent most of 2020 working on folklore and evermore, with Swift in Los Angeles for much of the time.

“In the beginning it did not feel real,” recalls Low. “There was this brand‑new collaboration, and it was amazing how quickly Aaron made these instrumental sketches and Taylor wrote lyrics and melodies to them, which she initially sent to us as iPhone voice memos. During our nightly family dinners in lockdown, Aaron would regularly pull up his phone and say, ‘Listen to this!’ and there would be another voice memo from Taylor with this beautiful song that she had written over a sketch of Aaron’s in a matter of hours. The rate at which it was happening was mind‑blowing. There was constant elevation, inspiration and just wanting to continue the momentum.

“We put her voice memos straight into Pro Tools. They had tons of character, because of the weird phone compression and cutting midrange quality you just would not get when you put someone in front of a pristine recording chain. Plus there was all this bleed. It’s interesting how that dictates the attitude of the vocal and of the song. Even though none of the original voice memos ended up on the albums, they often gave us unexpected hints. These voice memos were such on‑a‑whim things, they were really telling. Taylor had certain phrasings and inflections that we often returned to later on. They became our reference points.”

Sketching Sessions

“The instrumental sketches Aaron makes come into being in different ways,” elaborates Low. “Sometimes they are more fleshed‑out ideas, sometimes they are less formed. But normally Aaron will set himself up in the studio, surrounded by instruments and synths, and he’ll construct a track. Once he feels it makes some kind of sense I’ll come in and take a listen and then we together develop what’s there.

“I don’t call his sketches demos, because while many instruments are added and replaced later on, most of the original parts end up in the final version of the song. We try to get the sketches to a place where they are already very engaging as instrumental tracks. Aaron and I are always obsessively listening, because we constantly want to hear things that feel inspiring and musical, not just a bed of music in the background. It takes longer to create, but in this case also gave Taylor more to latch onto, both emotionally and in terms of musical inspiration. Hearing melodies woven in the music triggered new melodies.”

Not long after Dessner and Low sent each sketch to Swift, they would receive her voice memos in return, and they’d load them into the Pro Tools session of the sketch in question. Dessner and Low then continued to develop the songs, in close collaboration with Swift. “Taylor’s voice memos often came with suggestions for how to edit the sketches: maybe throw in a bridge somewhere, shorten a section, change the chords or arrangement somewhere, and so on. Aaron would have similar ideas, and he then developed the arrangements, often with his brother Bryce, adding or replacing instruments. This happened fast, and became very interactive between us and Taylor, even though we were working remotely. When we added instruments, we were reacting to the way my rough mixes felt at the very beginning. Of course, it was also dictated by how Taylor wrote and sang to the tracks.”

Dessner supplied sketches for nine and produced 10 of folklore’s 16 songs, playing many different types of guitars, keyboards and synths as well as percusion and programmed drums. Instruments that were added later include live strings, drums, trombone, accordion, clarinet, harpsichord and more, with his brother Bryce doing many of the orchestrations. Most overdubs by other musicians were done remotely as well. Throughout, Low was keeping an overview of everything that was going on and mixing the material, so it was as presentable and inspiring as possible.

Mixing folklore

Although Dessner has called folklore an “anti‑pop album”, the world’s number‑one pop mixer Serban Ghenea was drafted in to mix seven tracks, while Low did the remainder.

“It was exciting to have Serban involved,” explains Low, “because he did things I’d never do or be able to do. The way the vocal sits always at the forefront, along with the clarity he gets in his mixes, is remarkable. A great example of this is on the song ‘epiphany’. There is so much beautiful space and the vocal feels effortlessly placed. It was really interesting to hear where he took things, because we were so close to the entire process in every way. Hearing a totally new perspective was eye‑opening and refreshing.

“Throughout the entire process we were trying to maintain the original feel. Sometimes this was hard, because that initial rawness would get lost in large arrangements and additional layering. With revisions of folklore in particular we sometimes were losing the emotional weight from earlier more casual mixes. Because I was always mixing, there was also always the danger of over‑mixing.

“We were trying to get the best of each mix version, and sometimes that meant stepping backwards, and grabbing a piano chain from an earlier mix, or going three versions back to before we added orchestration. There were definitely moments of thinking, ‘Is this going to compete sonically? Is this loud enough?’ We knew we loved the way the songs sounded as we were building them, so we stuck with what we knew. There were times where I tried to keep pushing a mix forward but it didn’t improve the song — ‘cardigan’ is an example of a song where we ended up choosing a very early mix.”

Onward & Upward

folklore was finished and released in July 2020. In a normal world everyone might have gone on to do other things, but without the option of touring, they simply continued writing songs, with Low holding the fort. In September, many of the musicians who played on the album gathered at Long Pond for the shooting of a making‑of documentary, folklore: the long pond studio sessions, which is streamed on Disney+.

The temporary presence of Swift at Long Pond changed the working methods somewhat, as she could work with Dessner in the room, and Low was able record her vocals. After Swift left again, sessions continued until December, when evermore was released, with Dessner producing or co‑producing all tracks, apart from ‘gold rush’ which was co‑written and co‑produced by Swift and Antonoff. Low recorded many of Swift’s vocals for evermore, and mixed the entire album. The lead single ‘willow’ became the biggest hit from the album, reaching number one in the US and number three in the UK.

“Before Taylor came to Long Pond,” remembers Low, “she had always recorded her vocals for folklore remotely in Los Angeles or Nashville. When I recorded, I used a modern Telefunken U47, which is our go‑to vocal mic — we record all the National stuff with that — going straight into the Siemens desk, and then into a Lisson Grove AR‑1 tube compressor, and via a Burl A‑D converter into Pro Tools. Taylor creates and lays down her vocal arrangements very quickly, and it sounds like a finished record in very few takes.”

Devils In The Detail

In his mixes, Low wanted listeners to share his own initial response to these vocal performances. “The element that draws me in is always Taylor’s vocals. The first time I received files with her properly recorded but premixed vocals I was just floored. They sounded great, even with minimal EQ and compression. They were not the way I’m used to hearing her voice in her pop songs, with the vocal soaring and sitting at the very front edge of the soundscape. In these raw performances, I heard so much more intimacy and interaction with the music. It was wonderful to hear her voice with tons of detail and nuances in place: her phrasing, her tonality, her pitch, all very deliberate. We wanted to maintain that. It’s more emotional, and it sounds so much more personal to me. Then there was the music...”

The arrangements on evermore are even more ‘chamber pop’ than on folklore, with instruments like glockenspiel, crotales, flute, French horn, celeste and harmonium in evidence. “As listeners of the National may know, Aaron’s and Bryce’s arrangements can be quite dense. They love lush orchestration, all sorts of percusion, synths and other electronic sounds. The challenge was trying to get them to speak, without getting in the way of the vocals. I want a casual listener to be drawn in by the vocal, but sense that something special is happening in the music as well. At the same time, someone who really is digging in can fully immerse themselves and take in all the beauty deeper in the details of the sound and arrangement. Finding the balance between presenting all the musical elements that were happening in the arrangement and this really beautiful, upfront, real‑sounding vocal was the ticket.

“A particular challenge is that a lot of the detail that Aaron gravitates towards happens in the low mids, which is a very warm part of our hearing spectrum that can quickly become too muddy or too woolly. A lot of the tonal and musical information lives in the low mids, and then the vocal sits more in the midrange and high mids. There’s not too much in the higher frequency range, except the top of the guitars, and some elements like a shaker and the higher buzzy parts of the synths. Maintaining clarity and separation in those often complex arrangements was a major challenge.”

[joheunsaram]

To Make A Power Couple - 06 (knj)

Chapter 6: Garlic Pasta and I Miss You-s

THIS IS A REPOST SINCE I LOST ACCESS TO MY OLD ACCOUNT. PLEASE FOLLOW THIS BLOG FOR UPDATES ON THIS SERIES.

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Summary- Namjoon visits his parents and Yoongi and Y/N bond over their past.

word count- 4.5k

pairing- idol!namjoon x ceo!reader

rating- R

genre- series, fluff, angst, action, slightly smutty, strangers2lovers

warnings- drinking, talk of mental health and panic attacks, violence, blood, stalker

a.n- sorry for this chapter being late! i had major burn out this last few weeks but I finally got it out. Tell me what you think!

taglist - @beach-bitch-bitch-beach, @sscheherazadee, @rjsmochii , @jinjccns​ , @joyful-jimin @sideblogger @agustdpeach @diamonddia-mond

—

“I hate you Kim Namjoon! Get out!”

Namjoon looks at you with an amused smile as he drops his bags at the door of your bedroom. You’re sitting in your bed, your comforter fully around you, even on top of your head, as you loudly blow your nose, some show blaring on the television. Even though he feels bad about passing on his cold to you, he can’t help but find your red nose and whining adorable. The past few months since Namjoon returned from tour had been few of the best you’d had in Korea. Although you both still had remarkably busy schedules, you had found a routine of spending time together at least once a week, usually ending your Saturdays together to spend as much of the Sunday together as possible. It didn’t matter how you spent your time, whether it was spent going out on dates or sitting silently reading or cuddling, all that mattered was that you were together.

“Aw baby, I’m sorry!” He sat on the edge of the bed, wrapping his arms around your burittoed body. He kissed all over your face obnoxiously, much to your chagrin as you groaned and tried to get him off you, worried to get your snot on him. “Okay. Tell you what. I’ll cancel going to my parents and stay here to take care of you!” He punctuated that with another kiss on your lips. Hey, he’d already suffered through this cold, might as well take advantage of being able to be near you now.

“No! Shut up! You’re not cancelling.” Since things were slower at work, the company had decided to give Namjoon and the boys the week off. He had spent the first day with you, going to the most recent Ji Hye Yeom exhibit yesterday, and was going to go visit his family for the next four days. When Namjoon told you he was planning to spend the majority of his vacation with his parents, he was bracing himself for a negative reaction, a learned response from his previous relationship. His ex would always hate that he would visit his family for extended periods when he got time off and wouldn’t prioritize his relationship with her. He was surprised and relieved to hear you not only excited that he was visiting family but encouraging him to spend more time, upping his initial ask of two days to four. He liked that you always encouraged him to call his mom when he was on tour, as did his mom, so much so that she had started to say ‘my beautiful daughter’ whenever she referred to you in front of him.

Namjoon stood up as he watched you rant about the importance of visiting family, one arm out from your duvet heaven as you waved it about to emphasize your points. He almost giggled at how endearing you looked sniffling through your tirade, hair a mess and voice a little hoarse. Taking off his jeans to get comfortable, he chuckled at your wide eyes and dramatic gasp.

“No! We’re not having sex right now you maniac!” You whine as you lie down with the covers over your head. Namjoon gets into bed, pulling the comforter from over you to sneak inside, his arms snaking around your grumbling form to pull him to his chest. Although you complained, you snuggled into him, feeling the safe comfort that only Namjoon provided you.

“I just wanna nap with you before I leave.” He kissed the top of your head as he tangled your legs with his. You poked your head up from where it was hiding in his chest to look up at his smiling face as he cupped your cheek to place a chaste kiss on your lips. Caressing the skin once he leans away, he looks at you adoringly.  “Sorry for getting you sick, baby.”

———————————-

“Your boyfriend is a tyrant. Please never get sick again.” Yoongi took off his beanie and mask and shook his head to fluff his hair as you went through your phone to finish placing the order for takeout. After talking to Namjoon about how you had spent all of yesterday recovering, and even facetiming to ensure him that you were fit enough to be working again, he still didn’t believe you, forcing the only member of his band that was in Seoul during his vacation to make sure you were truly alright. You would be annoyed if your heart didn’t skip a beat at his overt concern. You were glad to spend time with Yoongi - he was pretty similar to you and you both had been slacking on hanging out lately. A few months ago you had decided to host a whiskey exchange where you would share bottles of your favourite liquor together, only for it to fall apart after two hangouts due to your busy schedules and Yoongi’s new relationship. It was nice to be in his company again, his mellow energy a great contrast to your usually loud friends.

“What did he say?” You question, laughing. Yoongi had called Namjoon many funny nicknames before but hearing him call him a tyrant made you laugh, picturing your boyfriend getting stern and demanding someone pay you a visit.

“You wanna see?” Yoongi chuckled as he pulled his phone out, navigating to the group chat and handing it to you. You couldn’t help but smile as you read Namjoon pleading to the group to check in on you, asking if anyone was around. Yoongi said he was around but refused only to relent once the other boys pressured him and Namjoon pulled in a favour Yoongi owed him from 2015.

“Ooof. Honestly, it’s not that bad. Good to know Jungkook would literally kill for me though, and that you hate to hang out with me.” You threw an ice cube at him from where you were putting them in your glasses.

“He wouldn’t. He’s just a suck up.” He dodged your attack, sticking his tongue out in triumph. “And you know I had to make Namjoon suffer a bit.”

Rolling your eyes at him as he smirked, you watched him pull out his bottle from his backpack. Your Craigellachie 16 no match for his Glenfiddich 30, you chastised him for buying such an expensive bottle for just the exchange. However, you were not going to say no to a glass of that and the two of you sat in a comfortable silence as you enjoyed your drinks. You were the first to break the silence.

“How’s your bae?”

“Oh haven’t you heard? Bae is no more! Broke my heart and left me to suffer.” Yoongi scowled as he dramatically grabbed his chest, before downing his drink. If you didn’t know any better you would’ve thought he was joking but his usual deadpan was missing.

“Shit… I’m sorry Yoongs.” You looked at him softly, making him scoff.

“It’s fine. Going to get a sick album out of this.” Yoongi waved you off, as he reached in his backpack again to bring out three bottles of soju. “Let’s get drunk!”

“That’s… one way of looking at things. You want to talk about it?” You knew he didn’t want to talk about it, it was probably still fresh and you didn’t want to impose but you wanted to give him the opportunity to share if he wanted to.

“Nah it’s fine. It was the usual anyways. ‘You’re always busy.’ ‘Why won’t you share your feelings with me?’ ‘Do you love me more or your career?’ I say good riddance.” He scoffed once again as he poured himself some more whiskey, sipping it blissfully.

“Well good to know you’re not hiding your pain.” You narrowed your eyes at him, but decided to get drunk with him anyways, taking up his offer to refill your glass. You had an extremely light day at work tomorrow with it being Friday and all, plus you knew that once Yoongi got drunk he would tell you how he was feeling. He was a very talkative drunk.

“Oh you know it. I’m nothing if not in touch with my feelings!”

Soon you and Yoongi were wasted, sitting on opposite ends of your couch as the television played the ‘important videos’ playlist on Youtube, laughing maniacally at each random short video that popped up. The food you had ordered was sitting on the coffee table, half eaten and getting cold. Having not heard Yoongi’s giggle in a while you looked away from the screen to see him staring into space, a slight frown on his lips.

“Dude. You good?” You poked him with your foot to break him out of his thoughts.

“Yeah. Sorry just realized I’m single again. Fuck.” He looked at you with wide eyes, as if he had just had an epiphany. You frowned at him, sad that he was feeling this way. In the past six months, you had come to learn that although Yoongi often talked about how much he loved being alone, in reality he put a lot of pressure on himself to find someone to be with.

“You know you’re worth more than a relationship, right?” You placed your hand on his, smiling reassuringly.

“Don’t go all Dr. Phil on me. I’m not that sad. It was like two months but it felt nice to call someone mine, you know?” He rolled his eyes at your concern, but held your hand tighter as he finished his sentence, averting his gaze with a melancholic look. He looked at you again sighing. “How did you get over your last breakup?”

“Um… not healthily. I almost sold my company.”

And so for the next hour, you told Yoongi of how messed up your previous relationship had made you. You don’t think you had talked about it in depth about your breakup with Beomseok for years now, but somehow drunk off extremely expensive whiskey and extremely cheap soju it felt natural to share the details about your most toxic relationship with Yoongi. Beomseok and you met when you were initially still in Canada, visiting Seoul in hopes of expanding. You were busy and he tried to help you as you adjusted to a new country, but as your relationship grew so did his tendency to ensure you relied on him. As hard as it was to admit to Yoongi, Beomseok had made you dependent on him, so much so that when he left you after two years of you accommodating him, you broke down. You started having terrible anxiety, using alcohol and cigarettes to take the edge off. Panic attacks became the norm so much so that you had contemplated leaving your position. You couldn’t see your friends, worked from home, and just buried yourself away. It took half a year of self destructive behaviour and for you to wake up in a bed with someone you didn’t remember to knock some sense into you and get yourself into therapy. Yoongi then talked about his own relationship issues, the two of you bonding over your struggles with mental health and shitty coping mechanisms. It was weird to think that Yoongi hadn’t been one of your close friends before this night.

It was around two in the morning by the time Yoongi left and you felt the emotions of the night catch up to you. You hadn’t thought about Beomseok in years, and thinking about him made you feel extremely sad for past you. You didn’t deserve how he treated you and you wished you could go back in time and shake some sense into yourself, and save the heartbreak. Lying in bed, drunk and emotional, you mourned for your old self and her faith in the world. However, looking at your phone you saw the photo of you and Namjoon - him standing behind you with his arm on your shoulder as he pretends to take a bite off your cheek as you grimace - and you were reminded that you were in a much better place now with a much better man. To say you looked forward to Namjoon returning tomorrow would be an understatement.

———————————-

Namjoon: I’m back!!! Namjoon: I miss you!!! Namjoon: Come over!!! Namjoon: I’m cooking for you!!! Y/N: Um… should I call poison control now or later? Namjoon: I’m back after almost a week and this is the welcome I get? Y/N: Babeeeee you know I love you! Namjoon: Prove it. Eat the pasta I’m making Y/N: Did anyone at least help you cook it? Namjoon: IT’S GOING TO BE GOOD. COME OVER. Y/N: Ok ok. No need to yell… Namjoon: Good. See you in an hour? Namjoon: I’m at the dorms btw Y/N: See you soon jooooooonie Y/N: I miss you too btw Namjoon: I love you too btw

You punched the code to the dorm and were greeted by a very excited Moni as you entered. The white dog jumping up at your legs, his tail wagging wildly behind him. You bent down in the entryway to give him a few scratches behind his ears, cooing and calling him a good boy.

“All this love for Moni, what about Joonie? I’m a good boy too!” You heard Namjoon shout out as you made your way through the large living room towards the kitchen, Moni playfully following.

“Aww is my good boy jealous?” You set your eyes on your boyfriend huddled over a cutting board, concentrating hard on cutting what seemed to be garlic, his jaw set. Namjoon was dressed in a blue overalls under which he wore a black sweater, the hood atop his head, the hair of which was now back to his natural dark brown, his nose scrunched as he attempted to keep his glasses from slipping. You don’t know if it was not seeing him for a while or the fact that he looked so cuddly, but you felt butterflies, your stomach somersaulting. You hadn’t felt them since the beginning of your relationship, and you were a bit unnerved that he still had that effect on you six months later.

“Holy shit. You look like a hot minion!” You almost yelled as you walked towards him, startling him enough to look at you with wide eyes under his black rimmed glasses and yelp.

“Don’t scare me like that! I almost cut my hand off!” He tried to glare at you but was soon smiling widely as you ducked under his arm to stand directly in front of him between the counter, putting your arms around his neck as you pulled him into a kiss. It felt amazing to have his plush lips against yours again, his familiar scent enveloping your senses till it felt like you were drunk off of him.

“I missed you,” you whispered against his lips. Your hands found your elbows as you pulled him in closer and deepened the kiss, making him moan, his tongue massaging yours as his hands went to your hips, pulling you to him. Before you could lose all your senses you felt a sharp poke on your lower back, and you reluctantly pulled away to look behind you.

“Joonie! You’re still holding the knife!” You said in alarm as his eyes widened again and he dropped it on the counter immediately before looking at you sheepishly and apologizing. “Control yourself. I don’t want to spend the night in the hospital!”

“Then stop distracting me! Go sit there and watch me make you the best pasta of your life.” He smirked and his eyes followed as you moved around the island to sit at the stool, bending down to pet Moni as he settled at your feet. Namjoon knew he was a terrible cook, but he had spent the time at home perfecting this recipe, subjecting his mom to the first few horrible tries, till he figured it out. It was a simple five ingredient dish but it was the first he’d learn and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to impress you. You always cooked for him, from experimental recipes you had found online to traditional Korean food that was second best only to his mom’s, and though he was always happy to do the dishes, he wanted your reunion to be special. He cooked almost quietly, blushing slightly at your words and looks of encouragement, plating it like restaurants would before placing it on the dining table and sitting next to you with a bottle of wine, anticipating your reaction.

“What the fuck? You can cook!” you exclaim as you dig in for another bite. Namjoon lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as he grinned at his success, finally digging into his meal. “I love the garlic. But damn, is this your way of telling me you don’t wanna kiss tonight?”

“Baby, I find even your gross morning breath irresistible, a little garlic’s not gonna stop me.” he laughed and you scowled at him, nudging him with your shoulder, as he leaned over to peck your lips. You weren’t trying to placate Namjoon, this pasta was absolutely delicious, the right amount of seasoning and everything. It warmed your heart that despite his firestarter tendencies he went through the effort to make you a home cooked meal.

As you ate, you talked about your days apart. You recovered from your cold within a day and had been back at work, and even though he scolded you for going back too fast Namjoon loved the way your eyes lit up when you talked about how you had managed to renew a contract with a client today, switching the period from their usual 1 year to 5 years. You had been working on this for a whole month, taking it upon yourself to attend meetings with not only the directors of this company but even the interns. He squealed with you at your success, high-fiving you and finding your excitement extremely adorable. You also talked about how after two bottles of soju Yoongi had finally admitted you were now his closest female friend and he agreed that you both should now tease him about it relentlessly.

Namjoon told you about how excited everyone was to have him home for that extended period of time, and how healing it was to be around them after the cacophony of tour. Apparently his sister had recently started learning how to make loom bracelets and he showed off the purple one on his wrist, telling you about how he had a matching one for you in his bag. Namjoon looked refreshed and you were glad you convinced him to spend the extra time home. He had also managed to bring back another bonsai tree to add to his collection, taking the time to explain how in a few years he could potentially tap the mini maple for some syrup. The image of your clumsy boyfriend trying to tap a tiny tree made you laugh. As the conversation continued and you both finished your food, you saw his mood dip a little. You silently lean forward cupping his face, as he nuzzles into your touch.

“My beautiful, hardworking boy. What’s wrong?” You coo with a soft smile on your face as your thumbs stroked his cheekbones and he pouts exaggeratedly before his hands go around your waist pulling you into his lap.

“I missed you.” He whispers as he nuzzles his face in your chest, his arms tightening around you. Namjoon felt cocooned in your sweet floral vanilla scent, and even though he’d been home just this morning, this felt like home too - just being in your embrace. He felt his heart swell with adoration as you stroked his hair slowly, whispering affirmations into his ear, slowly forgetting his worries about not spending enough time with you.

Usually when you both met after being apart, it was all desperation to get naked, but for the first time this felt much more intimate. He could hear your heartbeat and it soothed him. He suddenly envisioned both of you old and weathered in each other’s arms and he couldn’t fight the grin that made it on his face. He showered you in kisses, moving from your chest to your neck to your jaw and finally to your lips, where he stayed, kissing you firmly as his arms wind tighter around your waist. You lost yourself in his touch, wanting nothing more to be consumed by him as you tugged lightly at his hair, swallowing his moans. Before things could escalate you get startled by a loud thud.

“Wow! Right where we eat!” Jimin clicked his tongue in disapproval, as you both sheepishly stared at him.

“Noona!” Jungkook exclaimed as he came over to Namjoon and you, dragging you into a hug as he kissed the top of both of your heads. The two men seemed overly excited, and as Namjoon explained to you how he thought he was alone in the dorms tonight since no one has been around in weeks, the two interrupted to say that they had come to start a movie marathon, hoping to stay up all night since they had the day off tomorrow to marathon the Batman franchise as they had a bet going on as which one was the best.

“Do you guys want to join us?” Jimin asked politely as he munched on leftover pasta on the table. You excitedly opened your mouth to speak but before you could get a word out, Namjoon looked at you sternly.

“Nope.” He refused the boys as he looked at you, leaning in close to whisper in your ear before he nipped at it. “Baby, ignore your obsession with Batman. I want my dessert.” His voice was a few octaves lower than usual and his words made you shiver, a blush creeping up your face as a nervous giggle escaped your lips. Maybe you could skip rewatching these old movies, just once.

Bidding a quick goodbye to the boys and ignoring their smirks, you both made your way to Namjoon’s room. As soon as you were out of sight, Namjoon pulled you into another kiss, slotting your lower lip between his, making your heart race as he walked you down the hallway towards his room. You almost tripped over his bags haphazardly strewn in front of his door.

“Sorry, didn’t have time to go to my room yet.” He chuckled against your lips as his grip on your hips stabilized you. You giggled as you turned around to open his door, his lips on your neck instantaneously as he rubbed his growing bulge against your butt. His touch had you breathless as you moved in his room, Moni following closely behind you. Removing himself from you he picked up his dog and moved him outside murmuring an apology to the whining canine as he shut the door.

Without wasting any time, he pinned you against the door, your makeout session getting heavy. Your eyes were screwed shut as you mewled, his lips along your neck igniting a fire in you. Your hands moved from his hair to the buckles of his overalls, snapping them off as they fell to the ground unceremoniously. “Oh look! Easy access!” you exclaimed as he smiled against your skin.

His lips met yours again, his hands kneading the flesh of your sides under your shirt. You could kiss him like this forever, the way his tongue explores your mouth as if he doesn’t already know every crevice of your body, as if he’s worshipping you. His kiss slows down, turning from a sloppy fiery heat to intentional moves made to make you moan as he moves you towards the bed, dropping you to the middle as soon as your knees hit the back of the bed. He stands above you removing his shirt with one hand as you move backwards and soon he’s slotting himself between you.

“Fuck I love you.” He whispers as he kisses your cheek, moving towards your ear. You moan loudly as he grinds against you. Your hands run over his back, feeling the muscles as he continues to kiss your neck, biting it before soothing it with wide licks of his tongue. You used to be embarrassed by the marks he left behind but somehow as time passed you craved them. Jiyoung had even nicknamed him your vampire, and you’d be lying if that didn’t make you giddy.

Realizing you were still fully dressed you pushed at his chest, making him lie next to you as you straddled him, one of your knees almost slipping off the edge of the bed. You giggle at your clumsiness as he holds your hips to steady you and you slowly unbutton your shirt. As your skin becomes visible he runs his hands up your stomach to your chest, squeezing each breast as he reaches your neck before pulling your face to his.

“Mhmm… my pretty girl.” He almost growls as he pulls you into another heated kiss, his hands cupping your face as you grind on him. Suddenly you feel a tug at your hair, making you moan into his mouth, breaking the kiss. Before you know it you are on the floor, laughing at your clumsiness as you see his confused face, eyes still closed, lips puckered.

However, your laughter dies as you hear a loud screech. That’s when you feel that your hair was still being tugged as you looked up to see a tall, bulky woman, probably in her late thirties calling you a slut. Before you can even register what is happening you feel a sharp pain across your face as you realize you’ve just been punched. You taste the iron before you notice drops of bright red on your chest.

You cup your nose with one hand as you hear chaos ensue. Namjoon yelling your name as Moni barks loudly outside the room. You are aware that you are still lying on the floor but your eyes refuse to open as you hear scuffling before the door being slammed and Jungkook’s voice.

Everything’s a blur and you hear a loud blood curdling scream. Before you can register that that noise came from your mouth you hear your arm snap just as the most pain you have ever felt in your life turns your arm numb. You don’t remember much after, only grunts and shouts of your name. The last thing you hear is Namjoon’s voice calling your name repeatedly as he holds your head.

——

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[jungkooks-left-tiddie]

I think I’m in love | knj.

Summary: Your new internship sucked ass. It was fun, but exhausting at the same time. It also didn’t help that uni was also stressing you out. Amidst all this pressure and stress, perhaps a midnight walk on the Han River with your crush Kim Namjoon is what you needed all along. A/N: so I saw this namjoon picture circulating around stan twitter and my 3am sleep deprived ass decided to write a Drabble. 1 hour and 2k words later, here we are.

Words: 2k (maybe more idk I didn’t count)

Warnings: grammar issues, 4am writing

Song rec: I think I’m in love (kat dahlia)

———————————————————————————

“You’ve never been to the Han River at night?” Screams of outrage filled the silent room as you shook your head.

“I’ve never had the need to,” You frowned, feeling a little lost. “Plus it’s not like my parents would have let me.”

“Have you ever heard of something called sneaking out?” Jimin continued berating you and you couldn’t help but feel a little upset.

“Look, I know it may seem like Jimin-hyung is overreacting, but he’s not.” Jungkook clarified and made you feel even worse. “Han River is amazing at night.” The 3 boys nodded as if it were a common fact.

“You guys aren’t making this any better, y’know.” You frowned yet again.

They continued describing how mesmerising the river looked at night and you could do nothing but frown and continue doing your work.

Unbeknownst to you, Kim Namjoon kept sneaking glances at you from where he was seated. He wasn’t even trying to be subtle and that got on Yoongi’s nerves.

“Just ask them out, for fucks sake.” Yoongi massaged his eyes as Seokjin and Hoseok tried not to laugh.

“What do you mean?” Namjoon pretended to not know what Yoongi’s words meant and noted down a few more points for his assignment.

“Please tell me Namjoon did not just ask that,” Yoongi took a deep breath before proceeding, “Look, we all know that you have the most obvious crush on (Y/N) so just go and confess ok?”

It was true. Ever since you’d moved into the flat right opposite to his, Namjoon’s been talking about you non-stop.

But he continued to pretend like he didn’t hear Yoongi.

Seokjin and Hoseok, who were tired of their constant bickering and Namjoon’s denial, decided to take matters into their own hands.

“Yoongi’s right Joon,” Seokjin shared a mischievous glance with Hoseok before continuing, “If you don’t do anything, we will.” He declared, standing up and making his way to where you were sitting with Hoseok following in suit.

Namjoon started panicking even more when Yoongi decided to join Jin and Hobi as well, because he knew; oh he knew that they would not hold back. So he quickly ran after them and tried to convince them to back out.

“Guys, come on!” He begged, “I promise I will ask them out one day, but please please don’t do anything now,” It was too late now. Taehyung had spotted the lot of them walking up to your table.

“(Y/N), look!” You winced as Jungkook elbowed you harshly.

“What, dumbass--”  Kim Namjoon was standing in front of you.

For a moment, you felt your entire surroundings become a blur and you could only see Kim Namjoon in all his 6ft glory. And as soon as it came, it was gone because you had to remind yourself that people were watching.

“Jin-hyung! What’s up?” Jungkook hits the other man’s arm in greeting.

“Stop hitting me, punk,” They started doing their own thing again, forcing Hoseok to take over.

“We heard you guys talk something about rivers and we were bored so we decided to join lmao,” Hoseok dragged one of the chairs from a nearby table and slumped.

“Damn, I didn’t realise we were that loud,” Tae rubbed his neck sheepishly.

“It was necessary though! I mean it's not everyday we come to know that our best friend never visited the Han River at night,” All eyes were on you after Jimin’s statement.

“Wait (Y/N) really?” You nodded reluctantly. “I lived pretty far away plus I had strict parents so…” You hoped they would drop the topic here, and were extremely thankful when they did.

“Well, I'm sure you’ll have plenty more opportunities to visit. So don’t worry!” Seokjin cheered you up a little.

Your phone started ringing from nowhere and apparently your boss wanted you to collect some files to write a report on from the main office so you quickly informed your friends and bade them farewell.

Collecting the files wasn't the hard part. The hard part was walking home with no one except your thoughts to keep you company. You thought about what your friends said about the Han river and decided to make a trip if you were done with your work.

It sucked to admit it, but they were probably right. The Han River must be really mesmerising for them to talk about it so much and you found yourself suddenly envious of the rest of them.

Night strolls weren’t an option in your old neighbourhood; and though the new one wasn’t bad, you were busy with both uni and your internship. I mean being able to read your fanfics itself was a luxury and these hoes expected you to take a leisure stroll? Keep dreaming luv <3

You said all that to say, but you were still thinking about going there tonight. It seemed like immense fun and plus, it would be your first midnight stroll. You just hoped, with all your might, that you would be able to finish the work as soon as possible.

Lo and behold! 3 cups of coffee later, you were done!

To celebrate, you blasted some music on the speakers and danced along to the lyrics, bopping your head along to the beats.

Namjoon looked at your dancing form through his window. You seemed like you were having a lot of fun, he concluded, an amused  grin now apparent on his face. Judging by the way you seemed to have fun, Namjoon concluded that you must've been done with the work you mentioned you had.

Namjoon did not know the practicality of this, but he had a very random idea to take you on a riverside date. And you know what? He was going to do it. Fuck Yoongi, he’s going to prove it to the rest of them that he, indeed, could ask you out.

And so he took out a random book and wrote a message on it, Taylor Swift’s You Belong With Me style.

He did not know where this sudden confidence came from, but he took a small pebble from his rock collection and chucked it across to make sure it hit your window (yes, he was careful not to break it) and waited for your response.

You, on the other hand, were confused. Your mini-dance session was interrupted by a clink! Against your window and you went to check for the source of the sound; only to be met with Kim Namjoon’s waving form.

You panicked internally, not knowing what to do in front of the man you obviously had a thing for. And you were even more confused when he held up a paper with something on it.

“Do you want to go on a riverside walk with me?” It read.

Apparently, you could not form words so that’s fun =D. Instead, you chose to stand there like 🧍🏽and just nod in response. Namjoon gave you a beautiful dimpled smile with a thumbs up before closing the curtains to his window and switching his lights off.

It was only now that you were hit with the epiphany that you were going on what was essentially a midnight date with the Kim Namjoon and boy, oh boy, you were most certainly NOT prepared for it.

Rushing to your closet, you threw on your most comfortable pair of outerwear (and of course made sure you looked presentable) before chewing like 5 breath mints and grabbing your scarf (and your apartment keys) to go and meet Namjoon.

“Hey,” He smiled.

“Hey,” You replied, still breathless.

“Ready to go?” Namjoon asked and you nodded in response. You noticed that he hid something in his bag but made no comment and instead fell into a steady pace beside him.

The walk to the river was not awkward at all, thanks to Namjoon’s ability to radiate comfort. Which was a blessing cause otherwise you would definitely have embarrassed yourself by now.

You didn't even realise that you’d reached your destination until you noticed the numerous cars and lights.

“Woah.” You had no words for the sight in front of you.

“It's beautiful, isn't it?” Namjoon chuckled and sighed, “I love coming here. It never gets old.” He stares off into the distance.

You get it now. The way the bridge lit up, the view, the vibe, everything. It was enthralling. And the fact that it was Namjoon who was with you made this 1000 times better.

You were so absorbed with admiring the view in front of you that your dumbass didn't notice Namjoon staring at you. There was just something so absolutely adorable and endearing in the way your eyes lit up and seemed to sparkle at the sight in front of the both of you.

“Namjoon, look!” You grab the sleeve of his hoodie, “Purple lights!” He quickly snaps a picture of not only the scenery in front of him, but also you. You who were so excited to see this view at midnight for the first time.

You spent a bit more time admiring the view, goofing off, and taking pictures before finally deciding that it was time for the both of you to head back. As upset as you were, you took comfort in knowing that you could visit this place more often hereon.

The conversation on the walk back home was one that you would never forget.

“No way… Here I was thinking that alpha and beta were just limited to greek alphabet and math,” The look of horror on Namjoon’s face when you explained omegaverse was something that you desperately wanted a picture of, and regretted not taking one.

“It’s a thing that definitely exists, and though I may not be a fan of it; I think a lot of people are into that kind of thing.”

“Interesting,” He comments, pausing. “Say, would the title ‘My Alpha mate’ qualify as omegaverse?” His sudden question caught you off guard.

“I think so… Why do you ask?”

“I think… I think Yoongi-hyung is into omegaverse.” Even though you did not mean to, you burst out in laughter. Yoongi being into reading stories centering around dom alpha mating rituals was something you never needed to know but were glad you did.

You continued explaining the various fanfiction tropes to the other male, especially your favourite ones.

“Oh, I once remember reading this amazing Zuko, Sokka and Suki fic somewhere and I genuinely think that it should be nominated for the Nobel prize,” Namjoon looked at you affectionately while you rambled about the plot of the story.

“And at the end--” You paused, looking behind you and caught Namjoon standing with a camera in his hands.

“Sorry, you just looked so beautiful, I had to take a picture.” You were sure you looked like the capillaries in your face burst.

There were a lot of things Namjoon was proud about, and making you blush that hard was definitely on his top 5.

“L-let’s go, dork.” You try your best to brush it off but KIM NAMJOON JUST COMPLIMENTED YOU STFU OK YOU WERE ALLOWED TO CRY.

Anyways, y’all reached your apartment complex sooner than the both of you wanted, and honestly? Neither of you wanted the other to go.

“So,” “Actually--” You both begin at the same time. Flustered, you gestured to Namjoon to go ahead with what he wanted to say and assured him that what you wanted to say wasn’t of any major importance.

“I actually bought something for you,” He took a small bag out of his backpack and handed it to you. “It’s a collection of poems and short stories that i wrote for-for you,” He flushed and avoided making eye-contact with you.

“Namjoon, I--”

“You don’t need to read it, but I just wanted to give them to you because… because I really like you.” It was your turn to blush (again).

“Of course I will read it, you idiot. I’m literally in love with you, what makes you think I won't?” Namjoon widened his eyes and proceeded to smile bashfully, pulling you into a tight hug.

“You have no idea how happy I am right now,” He admits, swaying you around in his arms. You nuzzle deeper into his warm embrace and whisper--

“Thank you for everything, Joonie.”

[yourfavewriteress]

right under our noses (part 1) | colton parayko

intro |

Teaser: “Are you guys seriously not going to tell either of us who the other person is?”

“Trust me on this,” Jayne said. “Trust us.”

You looked over at Alex who was seated next to her. “For some reason I trust your word right now more than hers. Do you approve of this person?”

“You know I wouldn’t support setting you up with anyone I didn’t think could put up with you,” He replied.

“Alexander,” You warned him. Jayne groaned, slightly nudging his leg under the table.

“She’s being serious,” She added.

“I trust the guy, yes,” He said finally with a roll of his eyes. “We both wouldn’t set you up to get hurt, you know that already.”

“What if this doesn’t work?” You trusted Alex, and especially Jayne. If they were vouching for this guy, you really had no reason to question it. But, your dating life had not been the best. You were consistently getting caught up with the wrong guys, ones that would play with your feelings just to boost their own egos. You were a strong woman, and always kept your composure. But, you were tired of always being in the background. And maybe this could work. It doesn’t hurt to try, at least, not yet.

“Then we figure something else out,” Jayne shrugged.

You sighed, looking down at your drink.

“What are you worried about?” Jayne asked. You looked at her and shrugged. Jayne didn’t understand why you didn’t see yourself the way she did. To her, you were beautiful, smart, successful (albeit in a terrible job), strong, witty and loving. You were a catch, and she hated that the men in your past made you believe anything different.

Alex loved you like a sister. Ever since Jayne introduced you at one of his team parties, he was extremely impressed at your competitiveness in the ongoing drinking competition and became one of your biggest cheerleaders, even against his own teammates. He also hated hearing about the guys you dated, because although you weren’t actually siblings, he would have loved to knock out some of the guys you had let into your life. And if he could get the chance to size someone up before they got the chance to hurt you, he definitely wasn’t going to turn down the opportunity.

Alex cleared his throat, reading you like a book. “You’re not desperate.”

“Alex!” Jayne said, slapping his shoulder.

“Tell me that’s not what you’re thinking,” He raised his eyebrows at you. Seeing you as his sister, he sometimes knew you better than Jayne did.  “I know you, Y/N. Don’t lie.”

“You have to admit, it’s a little desperate,” You mumbled.

“We all know that Jayne isn’t really giving you an option,” He laughed.

“You know what, why don’t you go upstairs or something?” Jayne suggested. Alex laughed, kissing her before turning back to you.

“Ever since we met, I’ve never lied to you,” He started. “I seriously think you have nothing to worry about. We’ve all been through a lot of shit together, and whether this works or not, we’re always family.”

“And, you’re never ‘lonely,’ no matter who you are, or are not, dating,” Jayne added.

“But, it might be fun to explore some other options that maybe you missed in the past,” He gently nudged your shoulder. “And, with our help, hopefully you won’t have to worry about the guy being an idiot.”

“Fine,” You breathed, sighing. “But, when will I find out who it is for sure?”

“I guess not until you have the balls to bring it up to them,” Jayne smirked.

“Are you serious?”

“No,” Alex said, shaking his head at Jayne. He knew that you might change your mind, “We just want you to get to know each other before we say anything about who’s who. Obviously, if you’re closing in on the wrong person, we’ll warn you.”

“I’m still not understanding how this is going to work,” You crossed your arms over your chest. “How are you guys so certain that we’ll both know who you’re talking about? I’m assuming you’re telling him the same thing.”

“That’s the point,” Jayne said. “It was kind of an epiphany for us, so we hope it’ll be for you guys, too.”

“I told her how much it sounded like a movie,” Alex said. “But, the similarities between you are obvious to us knowing both of you, but clearly not to you guys.”

“Can we just try it for two months and see how we feel?” Jayne added when she noticed your hesitance.

“In two months, you tell me who it is,” You ordered, pointing at both of them clearly.

“Sure,” Alex shrugged, but he smiled as he continued, “That is, if you don’t already figure it out yourself.”

****

“I don’t know, guys,” Colton mumbled to Alex and his wife Jayne. They had just finished their game against the New Jersey Devils and were on their way to their respective cars when the couple decided to update Colton on their plan.

“She already agreed,” Jayne said. “Just waiting on you.”

“Are you guys seriously not going to tell either of us who the other person is?” He asked, keeping his voice down so no one could hear them as they walked through the crowded hallway.

“Nope,” Jayne responded. “It’ll be fun and exciting, trust me.”

“What happens if I meet someone else before we figure it out?” He asked.

“Well, we’re going to hope that you don’t,” Alex responded, giving him a look. “But, we’d probably just call it off.”

“You guys already know each other, all we’re asking is that you just get to know the people around you. And, we’ll do our best to make sure that’s her without you knowing.”

“I find it really hard to believe that this is going to work,” He said once they reached the couple’s car. “But, if you guys are both vouching for this plan and her, I guess it doesn’t hurt to try. It’s not like I’m seeing anyone.”

“Yes!” Jayne exclaimed, hugging Colton. He laughed, hugging her back. “I promise you won’t regret it.”

“You won’t,” Alex said. “If it works.”

“Okay, I’m going to get the car started,” Jayne said, pulling away from Colton to give the guys some time. “Good luck, Parry.”

“Don’t disappoint me.” She shook her head, walking towards the door and leaving the two guys alone.

“What do you know about the girl?” Colton asked. “You have to give me something to go on, man.”

“Let’s just say that you guys have a little history,” He shrugged, smirking at his teammate. “Not enough that would stop something from happening now, but enough that you might remember.”

“What the fuck does that mean?” Colton called when he realized Alex was done giving hints.

“I guess you’ll have to wait to find out.”

****

After agreeing to take part in the plan and allow your best friend and her husband to set you up with someone, you tried your best to continue your normal routine. If they were so certain that this guy was perfect for you and you would be able to see it, you planned on talking to everyone as normal and then paying attention to what happens. To be fair, that was all that you could do.

“Y/N?” You stopped in your tracks, turning on your heels.

“Aaron?” You furrowed your eyebrows. “What are you doing in St. Louis?”

“I’m visiting,” He laughed. “How are you?”

He walked towards you, immediately pulling you into his chest. “I’m great, how are you? Weren’t you just in Minnesota or something?”

“Yeah, for some business meetings,” He pulled away. 

“Wow, I guess you’re a big shot now,” You joked.

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I’m such a big shot that I still drive the same old car. I was actually hoping I would bump into you somewhere. Do you maybe want to grab a drink sometime? Catch up?”

“Uh, sure, yeah,” You nodded, slowly. “Just text me and we can set something up.”

“Same number?”

“Yeah, same one,” You replied.

“Okay, then. I guess I’ll see you soon,” He smiled, waving.

You smiled back, returning to your cart. Throwing your bag over into the top part, you pulled out your phone, clicking Jayne’s number almost immediately. 

“Hello?”

“Please tell me the person you’re thinking of is not Aaron Nichols who I met at that freaking parade when the guys won. If it is, abort the mission, now. Over my dead body.”

Jayne laughed, “What? No, it’s not Aaron Nichols. Who the hell is that?”

“Thank god,” You breathed. “Because he just asked me out in the grocery store.”

“Well, our guy isn’t going to be asking you out anytime soon. We promised you a slow burner,” She said.

“Oh please,” You rolled your eyes. “So, have I come across him yet and not realized it?”

“I don’t know, have you?” She threw back.

“How is that helpful at all?”

“We also told you that it’ll be much better if you guys figure this out on your own. No hints, no telling you if or where you’ve seen them.”

“You guys suck,” You responded. “I bet you Alex has given this guy lots of hints.”

“To be fair, I did tell you that it wasn’t Aaron, which I won’t do anymore. You can’t ask us every time you have an encounter with a guy.”

“Well, why not?” You whined. “Am I really just supposed to talk to everyone with the possibility of dating?”

“Exactly.”

“You guys suck,” You repeated. “I have to go, I’m checking out.”

“I’ll call you later.”

****

Colton wasn’t doing much better, either. Agreeing to this plan meant that he had to pay attention to all of his encounters with the women that he knew. And, he knew a lot. Although a gentleman, Colton had had his fair share of partners. But, the plan limited the amount of options to women that Alex and Jayne knew as well, especially Jayne, since Colton picked up on how close Jayne felt to this woman. She was obviously close with Alex, too, who seemed to trust this girl enough.

“Hair color?” Colton breathed, running on the treadmill.

Alex laughed, shaking his head beside him. “Stop.”

“Where do I know her from?” He asked.

“I’m not telling you anything about her,” Alex said.

“Fuck, man,” Colton sighed. “I feel like I shouldn’t have agreed to this.”

“Why?”

“Because, it’s like you guys playing matchmaker for me and this person that I supposedly have a history with. If I have a history with them, maybe there’s a reason why it didn’t work out,” He said.

“People mature,” Alex pointed. 

“Me or her?”

“Both.”

“Well, what’s our history? Did we date?”

“No, you definitely didn’t date.” Alex almost laughed, thinking back to his warning that he was 100% sure Colton respected.

“This feels a little desperate,” Colton admitted. “Like I can’t find someone myself.”

“If it makes you feel any better,” Alex paused his run briefly to lean on the machine, facing Colton. Colton did the same, catching his breath as Alex continued. “She said the exact same thing when we told her. Look, this isn’t some game show trying to pair you up with some stranger that you don’t know. This is, and as much as it literally pains me to say, one of your closest friends helping you find someone that I can genuinely see you having something with. I know what you like, I know what you need, and I guess I care about you being with someone that is going to be good for you.”

“Do you actually know her?”

“Yes, man,” Alex huffed. “She’s a really good friend of ours. She has a job, a life, her own place that she pays for with her own money. Independent, funny, but depending on your humor. Jayne and I both agree that you have the same annoying humor so there’s that. You said something earlier about not wanting someone soft? Trust me, she’s not. But, she has a soft side. You’re not soft, per se, but you have a soft side, too. She likes that. And, I can assure you, even though this is subjective, you’ll definitely be attracted to her. Now, that is the last piece of information you are ever getting out of me about her until time is up. Seriously.”

He let out a breath as he starting the treadmill back up. “Are you done now? Can I finish my workout?”

“That’s all I really needed to know,” Colton said, even though he really wanted to know more. “You just convinced me, not gonna lie.”

“Sounds like your dream girl, huh?”

Colton let out a laugh, “A little, yeah.”

“We thought so, too.”

[louiseleblancdiggory]

I just read the pregnancy rowaelin angst and it made me feel so many things. Would you write a second part, where Aelin actually find out she's pregnant again and is all happy but also scared to tell Rowan? And then the first ultrasound happens? Maybe they already have an adopted child and they are so excited to become a sibling and it's all cute and fluff. ❤️

This is so sweet. Like so fucking sweet it gave me toothache. I threw as much fluff as I possibly could because as I said, pregnancy is something personal to me and I love happy endings. It’s fucking long but I hope you enjoy every single second of it. This is the part one!

Warnings: literally none, it’s just really cute

Safe haven 2

--

Aelin was resting against the hood of her car, arms crossed and eyes scanning the crowd for…

“Mommy!” A little girl screamed from the school’s door. Her inky black hair bounced as she ran to Aelin, her green eyes shining with excitement. “Mommy, here!”

Aelin’s face broke into a wide grin as she jogged in her daughter’s direction and grabbed the little girl in her arms. She immediately peppered her daughter’s face in quick kisses, earning delighted laughs.

“Hello, Aurora. How was your day at school, baby?” Aelin asked, standing up with Aurora in her arms. The girl hugged Aelin’s neck fiercely, resting her head on her mother’s shoulder. “Made any friends?”

Aelin fought a smile when she saw Aurora blushing and smiling sheepishly. “His name is Lachlan, and he’s new to the school. He speaks nice.”

“Oh, he does?”

“Yes. He said is how people speak where he come from. Some kids made fun of it, but I think it was pretty. Just like daddy speaks a little different too.”

Aelin nodded, kissing her daughter’s crown. For all her excitement and free spirit, Aurora was awfully shy around anyone who wasn’t her family or people she knew since her adoption. Her best friend, Aedion and Lys’s daughter, was a year younger so they couldn’t be in the same class. Rowan and Aelin had been hoping for weeks now that Aurora would make at least one friend in school. She was six and smart like her dad, which caused her to feel a little bit different from the other kids.

Aelin couldn’t wait to see the relief on Rowan’s face that their baby had made a friend.

“So now you guys are friends?”

“Yes!” She smiled excitedly and clapped her hands. “He said he’s gonna bring me some candies from his kingdom tomorrow, and I said I would bring a picture of Fleetfoot.”

“That’s so great, baby.” Aelin smiled, putting Aurora in her seat and buckling her up. “We’ll find the most beautiful picture of Fleetfoot to show Lachlan.”

Her daughter squeaked with delight, and Aelin laughed as she opened her window and closed the door. She stood on the side walk once more, looking around again, searching for someone else.

“Mom!” A teenage boy called her.

“Nino!” Aurora shouted from the backseat. “Nino, I made a friend!”

Nino smiled at her voice, his friend group smiling too. They all waved at Aelin as her son jogged in her direction, giving her a quick kiss on her forehead. Although Nino was adopted, everyone liked to joke he had gotten Rowan’s genes. His and Aurora’s green eyes were the exact same shade as Rowan’s, and Nino was becoming as tall as his father.

He waved back at his friends and they were shouting their goodbyes as they walked away.

“Bye, aunt Aelin!” Evangeline shouted.

Aelin smiled at her and waved back. Evangeline had been Aedion and Lys’s ward much before Aelin and Rowan had even considered adoption. Eva was much as Lys’s daughter as Nino and Aurora were her kids.

“How was your day in school?” Aelin said, getting in the car as Nino took the passenger seat.

“Fine.” He said, and Aelin only raised a brow at him. He sighed, rubbing his eyes under his glasses. “I bombed math.”

Although she should be pissed, should act like the strict mom and reprimand him from bombing another math test, Aelin had to fight a smile. “Your dad is gonna eat your liver with a spoon if you keep failing math exams.”

“Mommy! That’s disgusting!” Aurora said, and Aelin looked back to see her frowning her whole face with disgust.

Aelin laughed, and so did Nino.

“I know, I know. Evangeline also barely passed, Malik did worse than I. Phedre said she could teach me.”

“Oh, she did?” Aelin was absolutely certain that her son had the biggest crush on one of his best friends, Phedre. Whenever Eva came to their houses with Aedion and Lysandra, she would also tease her cousin endlessly.

“Mom.”

She batted her eyelashes innocently. “Yes, sweetie?”

“Stop that shit.” Aelin also knew she should reprimand him from cursing, but she fully believed that a sixteen year old boy should be allowed to say some curse words here and there. Never in important occasions, but both she and Rowan were fine with it during their daily lives.

Aelin only snorted, and silence fell upon the car.

She quietly looked at her two kids, Aurora playing with a doll she had found and Nino typing something on his phone, and a small smile played on her lips.

When Aelin learned that she would have difficulty getting pregnant three years ago, her world fell. She didn’t want to base her whole life on that fact, but it was like seeing some of her biggest dreams getting crushed right in front of her eyes. Even when Rowan started explaining to her how the adoption process would be, a part of her was still sad by the prospect of not getting pregnant.

It hadn’t taken them too long to go to foster care. Aelin had to admit, she was only half paying attention during the beginning of their visit, her mind still heavy with a sort of mourning. She still remembered the feeling of being completely devastated, and only Rowan’s pine green eyes had taken her out of her stupor.

She stopped mid track when she again saw Rowan’s pine green eyes staring at her, only it wasn’t Rowan because he was walking behind her. Aelin took in the little three year old sitting on the floor, playing with two old dolls.

That moment had been Aelin’s epiphany.

It was like a whole new path had been revealed to her, a striking realization that she might have dreamed of getting pregnant, but that wasn’t all that there was. She could keep trying, but she wouldn’t waste away in grief.

“Who’s she?” Aelin’s voice was low, and the social worker stopped talking to Rowan, both of their heads turning to her. “The little girl with black hair. What’s her name?”

“Who? Aurora?” At that, the girl smiled at Aelin and Rowan, extending one of her dolls.

For the first time in a week, Aelin’s smile was genuine. Her heart was beating so fast, hope blossoming where grief had been. She approached the girl and seated on the floor with her, taking the doll and starting to play. She felt Rowan’s soft gaze on them, and also heard the whispered words with the social worker.

“How old is she?”

“Three.” The woman responded. “Although our highest demand is for babies, Aurora would have a greater chance being adopted if she didn’t have an older brother. Not everyone is willing to take in two kids, much less when one who is so much older.”

“How old is he?” Aelin said, turning to look at the social worker and Rowan standing behind her. Aurora seemed content with playing with Aelin’s doll even though Aelin wasn’t moving it.

“Dominique is thirteen. We all call him Nino because Aurora couldn’t pronounce Nick, only Nino.”

Aelin stared at Rowan, and he stared right back. They had come here to look for babies, that’s for sure. Aelin wanted to be there every step, wanted to see every phase. They didn’t even know what they would do with a teenager. Or with two kids at once. But Aelin’s heart had almost burst out of her chest when she took a look at Aurora, and the thought of just going home and never seeing her again hurt.

“Can we meet the boy?” Rowan asked, not taking his eyes off Aelin.

“Of course, just a second.” The woman wandered off, and Rowan came to sit by Aelin.

Aurora eyed him suspiciously, but relaxed when he gave her a reassuring smile.

“I’m Aelin, this is my husband Rowan.” Aelin gestured between them, her voice soft so she wouldn’t scare the girl.

Aurora smiled at them, and was opening her mouth to say something when her brother entered the room.

If Aurora had been Aelin’s epiphany, Nino had been Rowan’s.

Rowan looked at Aelin and both of them shared a secretive smile.

And that had been that.

Rowan got all the papers to bring the kids to live with them and then the adoption papers. It was strange in the beginning, the new addition to the house, but they soon feel in such natural normalcy that Aelin sometimes wanted to cry when she thought of it.

Nino absolutely loved Aelin, but he adored Rowan. His father was his role model, and Nino did everything to build a relationship with Rowan as fast as possible. They went to hockey and football games together. Rowan always took Nino to practice, and they would always go out just the two of them after to eat something. Aurora was closer to Aelin, but she adored her father just the same and had him wrapped around her little finger.

There was so much love on Rowan’s eyes when he looked at their kids that Aelin’s heart skipped a beat.

She loved her family so much that sometimes she felt she could die from it.

“Mom?” Nino woke her up from her memories. She parked the car in front of Rowan’s clinic, and when Nino started taking off his seatbelt, she put a hand on his wrist. He looked at her puzzled, but didn’t say anything. He rested against the seat again, playing on his phone as Aelin took Aurora out and walked in the clinic.

Rowan was a surgeon, but he sometimes did some clinic consults. On those days, Aelin would bring the kids to spend the day with him. She waved at Fenrys who was talking with a patient, and he waved back and winked at Aurora, making her giggle at her uncle.

“Dada!” Aurora shouted the moment she saw Rowan’s silver head, and his head snapped up with a smile already on his face.

“If it’s not my two favorite girls in the whole world.” He stood, walking to them. Rowan took Aurora out of Aelin’s arms and bent down to give her a kiss. He gave another quick one before standing straight again. He gave a peck on Aurora’s forehead and she laid her face on his shoulder. “Where’s Nino?”

“Sick.” Aelin lied. “I’m taking him home. Nothing serious, just a little headache and nausea.”

Rowan’s brows instantly furrowed, and he looked to the entrance as if he could see his son sitting inside the car. “Want me to check on him?”

Aelin laughed. “He’s not that sick and would hate the fussing. He’ll be better once you go home, but for today is only you and Aurora.”

He nodded, still not fully convinced.

“Actually, Aurora has something to tell you.” Aelin said with a smile. “About her new friend.”

Rowan’s face broke into a curious smile and he looked at his blushing daughter. “Oh?”

“His name is Lachlan and he speaks nice.” She said shyly.

Rowan bit his lip not to laugh, and Aelin did the same. She stepped closer to him, giving him another kiss. “I’ll see you home. Love you.”

“Love you too, Ace.” He called after her as she left, immediately turning to his daughter to hear about her new friend.

The moment Aelin got into the car, Nino looked at her. “So, what are we hiding from dad?”

“Why would you think that?”

“You say you know me because I am your son. Well,” he shrugged. “I know you because you’re my mom.”

She smiled at that, but it slowly fell. “It’s a secret, Nino. And I really need you to keep it.”

He was suddenly serious. “You can tell me whatever, mom.”

She blew a breath. “I’m pregnant.”

He stared at her for a few moments before a smile broke on his face. Nino had known since the beginning how much his mom wanted to get pregnant. It had never made him feel less wanted or loved, and he couldn’t be happier for her right now. “Mom, that’s amazing! Why can’t dad know?”

“What if I lose it again, Nino? I can’t put your dad through it again. I remember the miscarriages from years ago and although he doesn’t think so, I knew the devastation on his eyes. I never held for more than three weeks. I’m so sorry to put this weight on you, sweetheart, but I just couldn’t go to the ultrasound alone.”

“It’s no weight, mom. Of course it isn’t.” He was still smiling at her. “How long?”

“I don’t know. The treatments mess up my periods so I haven’t had one in two months, but that doesn’t mean anything. I started getting morning sickness a few days ago, so maybe a week.” Aelin was tense, her palms clammy as she started driving to the hospital. “I’m so nervous, Nino. It crushed me three years ago, and I haven’t had a pregnancy scare since then.”

“You had three years of treatments, mom. Everything is gonna be alright and Aurora will have a little sibling to pick on.” Despite her tension, Aelin laughed. Nino was always calm, always a steady presence. His reassurance made her calmer, even though she wished she could call Rowan. He was the only one who really knew how to soothe her nerves.

The last few days had been torture. Her hands had been trembling when she bought a pregnancy test. Trembling even more when it came back positive. She wanted to tell Rowan so, so bad. Wanted to have him by her side as she discovered if she would be able to hold it or not, but she couldn’t bring herself to break his heart again. They had been so happy for the past three years with Aurora and Nino that Aelin wouldn’t dare to break his peace.

In the waiting room, Nino talked to his mom about anything to distract her. Aelin forced herself to listen about his classes, about hockey practice, about how Malik, his best friend, had gone to the infirmary after Evangeline accidentally decked him during gym. How he and Phedre had laughed their asses off while watching the scene.

She was smiling softly at her son when the nurse came in, asking her if she was ready. Just like that, all her calm disappeared. Her heart was beating so fast that it was all she could hear as she walked entered the room.

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Whitethorn. How are we doing today?” The doctor asked as Aelin laid down. He rode her shirt up to expose her belly, applying the cold lubricating jelly onto her skin. “Your son?”

“My oldest, yes.” Aelin answered automatically. She was too nervous to elaborate further. Nino was sitting on a chair by the bed, elbows on his knees while he stared at the black monitor.

“So let’s get over with it, shall we?” He said with a smile, asking her a few questions before putting the transducer against her skin. Immediately the black screen lit up, and the doctor stared at it, moving the thing across her belly.

Aelin couldn’t tear her eyes away from the screen, trying to understand what was going on. Her heartbeat was steady but so strong that she could feel her whole body shaking with it. “So?” She asked after a few moments.

The doctor was silent, still analyzing what was on the screen. When he turned to her, he gave her a smile. “Everything seems fine, Mrs. Whitethorn. Because of your treatments your period was irregular, and that was most likely what stopped you from noticing the pregnancy earlier. Judging by the size, you have two healthy and strong babies inside of you for two months now. I would still recommend biweekly visits just to make sure nothing changes but... The pregnancy seems fine, nothing apparent to worry about. Congratulations.”

Aelin’s whole world stopped at that moment. She could feel her cheeks dampening, her mouth letting out a small sob but she wasn’t really there. Her mind was spinning and she had never known this feeling. She wanted to put her hand on her stomach, above the two little things she could not even feel but knew that were there.

“Would you like to hear it?”

She nodded, her eyes glued to the monitor. When Aelin first heard the two soft heartbeats twining together, she was fully crying. It was like hearing the response to so many questions she didn’t even know she wanted the answers. It cracked a damn inside of her, and she closed her eyes, basking on the sound of her babies’ heartbeats.

She turned to Nino and he was smiling at her. “Damn, now I have to share my heritage with two more people?”

Aelin laughed out loud, the sound merry to her ears. “Can I record it? To show my husband?”

“Of course, and if you want a picture we can provide that.”

Aelin nodded eagerly, and held onto the recording and the pictures all the way home. When they arrived, Rowan’s car was already parked in the garage.

“Where were the two of you?” Rowan asked the moment Nino and Aelin stepped inside. “And I thought you were sick.”

Nino smiled at his father, speaking to him as he went up the stairs, his voice gloating. “I knew first.”

Rowan’s face was a mask of confusion as he watched his son disappear. He turned back to Aelin, sitting on their couch. “Knew what first?”

Unable to help herself, tears started falling from her eyes and she went to him. He immediately grabbed her in his arms, holding her on his lap. Even not knowing what was going on, Rowan whispered soothing words to her and rubbed her back.

He gave her a strong kiss to the forehead. “Fireheart, what happened?”

She wordlessly took out her phone, looking for the recording. He watched her intently, worry showing on his face.

Rowan was a doctor, he would understand what that was without her explaining, she she silently played it. It took him a moment of listening to the recording to understand what it was, for the expression on his face to go from worry to absolute exhilaration.

He put a hand on her stomach, the other one going to the back of her neck to hold Aelin in place when he kissed her. His lips were warm and soft against hers, and Aelin sighed in complete happiness as she hugged his neck. She could feel the smile on his lips, all the love and happiness he was feeling in that kiss.

“You’re pregnant?”

She nodded cheerly, her eyes watering again. Her tears started falling the same moment a single one fell from Rowan’s eye. “Two months, Ro. And they’re fine, healthy and big and strong.” She laughed, kissing him again. “We’re going to have two more kids, Ro.” She showed him the picture of the ultrasound, the two little things laying next to each other.

He grabbed the picture with one had, staring at it in awe. When his eyes fell upon Aelin’s face, the expression changed to so much love and adoration it knocked the air out of her lungs.

He boomed a loud and happy laugh, standing up with her in his arms and sweeping around. Aelin was laughing, her arms tight around his neck. “I love you. I love you so much, fireheart. I love you so fucking much sometimes I think I’ll combust from it.”

She was crying again, holding onto Rowan as if he was her life line. “I love you too, Ro. I love you so much that just looking at your face makes me loose my breath. I love you so much that I think it’s impossible to love you more, but it happens every day.” Aelin kissed him, euphorically and sloppy.

“The two of you are disgusting. Find a room, for fuck’s sake.” Nino said from where he was standing at the stairs, Aurora in his arms. She was beaming at her parents, and Rowan held Aelin with one arm as he extended the other one to their kids.

Nino smiled and went up to his father, hugging his side as Aurora threw herself at him. She was blabbering about the babies, about being an older sister and Rowan, Aelin and Nino were quietly laughing at her. Aelin, still holding one of Rowan’s hand, pulled Nino into a hug. “Thank you for going with me, Nino. You’re the best son I could ever dream of.”

His cheeks turned a shade of pink but he hugged his mom back, looking at his father. “I knew first.”

Rowan faked impatience, narrowing his eyes. The intimidating effect was completely ruined by Aurora in a pink tutu in his arms, pulling his hair in all directions. “You’ve gloated already, boyo.”

“I’ll never let you forget.” Nino was grinning, his arm around Aelin’s shoulder. She bit her lip to hold her laughter.

“Gods help me.” Rowan muttered.

“You could even say I am mom’s favorite man in the house.”

“You’re asking to get grounded.”

“Lost your position, old man.”

Rowan rolled his eyes. “How was your math test?”

“Actually,” Nino said, taking his arm off his mom’s shoulder and backing up a step. “You can have the favorite man position.”

“Nino Galathynius Whitethorn.”

“It’s all yours!” Nino shouted to his dad as he ran up the stairs.

Rowan looked exasperatedly at Aelin, and even with all her efforts she couldn’t keep her joyous laugh from escaping her lips.

“He gets being shit at math from his mother.” Aelin shrugged.

Rowan huffed a laugh. “The bunch of you will give me silver hair.”

“Dad!” Aurora shouted from his arms. “You already have silver hair, duh!”

This time, when Aelin’s laugh rang out, Rowan’s did too.

Tags:

@abookishfreak @faerie-queen-fireheart @in-love-with-caramel-macchiato @jlinez @courtofjurdan @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @ladywitchling @maastrash @morganofthewildfire @queen-of-glass @bilkul-sharam-nahi-aati

[alitaimagines]

“I will leave you satisfied, forever past time, you don't have to hide your free to fly. I know after tonight you don’t have to look up at the stars.”

bakugou katsuki - MY HERO ACADEMIA 

note: still looking for more MHA character imagine suggestions. 

you plus a few of the girls in the class were lounging around the common room on a very lazy Saturday afternoon. you and Momo were cuddling, your back was against her chest as the two of you watched some random make up tutorials on your phone. 

ya know, just girly tingz~ 

“oh, we know where this is going!” you heard Mineta’s disgusting comment as him and a few other people walked in, “yeah, it’s going to be me getting up and kicking your ass so hard you’ll regret even making that comment.”

“it’s not unusual for friends to cuddle each other Mineta, you’re just a pervert,” Kirishima inquired as you shouted a very loud ‘thank you’, “do we have any plans for dinner? it’s getting late and we need to go shopping for whatever it is that we eat,” you said trying to get off the current subject. 

this was the dreaded conversation every weekend at the dorms. everyone liked to make home made food on the weekends but none of you were able to agree on just one dish and tended to make three different meals to give some options. 

you shifted yourself against Momo and looked to see all of your roommates in deep thought, “okay, what if two of us just go to the store and see what we find? I’ll go since I haven’t left the dorms all day,” you told them as you looked for a partner to accompany you. 

you were pleasantly surprised to see that it was Bakugou who offered to come with you. the two of you ran in the same friend group but the two of you hardly ever talked each other one on one. 

Bakugou was cute, you couldn’t deny that. you knew his anger was an issue but when you sat down to think about it, he hardly ever got loud with you. yeah, he might’ve gotten annoyed with you but he never treated you the way he treated the rest of his classmates. 

once you grabbed your bag and ran back downstairs, you noticed Bakugou’s red face while Kirishima and Kaminari tried to hold back their laughter. 

“did I miss something?” you asked the three of them, “no, you idiot!” Bakugou screamed making you flinch, “didn’t mean to yell, I’m sorry,” he muttered as he stalked towards the entrance. 

your eyebrows fluttered in confusion before waving off the class and walking towards Bakugou. he opened the door for you and the two of you started the tread to the grocery store. 

“did you need something the store, Bakugou?” you asked him, “you never come on these trips,” you added on. 

he shrugged, “just felt like it,” he simply said as you shrugged, “oh, okay! were you in the mood for something in particular? since we’re the ones going to the store, it’s ultimately up to us,” you pondered. 

Bakugou thought for a moment, “ramen?” he mentioned as he watched your eyes light up, “ramen! that sounds amazing Bakugou!” you exclaimed as he tried to shrug off your excitement. 

the store near the U.A. dorms wasn’t too far away so it didn’t take long for the both of you to arrive. you noticed a few stands on the side of the store and although you wanted to check out what they were, you knew you weren’t getting money from your parents for another few days and you didn’t want to come across something you liked and couldn’t buy. 

“let me grab a cart so we can get everything for the ramen,” you told Bakugou as he nodded. he was eerily quiet and maybe the only reason why he offered to come along was because he wanted fresh air, “aww, if I had enough money, I would totally offer to make dessert for everyone but I don’t think I have enough,” you told yourself. 

Bakugou heard what you said and although he wasn’t going to feed the rest of his idiotic classmates dessert, he found something the two of you could share after dinner. 

now he just had to figure out how to actually ask you. 

he grabbed a small red velvet cake and stuffed it into the cart, hidden among the other grocery items and walked until you got everything you needed. after the cashier checked everything out, between you and Bakugou, you were carrying three bags each. 

“young children!” you heard an elderly voice say. you turned around to see that it was an old woman at one of the stands. you pointed at yourself and Bakugou as she nodded, “yes you two! come here!” she exclaimed as you sighed. 

the two of you approached the woman who looked like she was straight out of the 70s, “would you like to test your love? this machine has never hit 100 and you guys could possibly be the first!” she teased as you tried to deny, “it’s completely free and if you guys hit 100, I’ll gift both of you a matching necklace and bracelet,” she offered. 

you gave Bakugou a look of annoyance, “we aren’t even together, old lady,” Bakugou yelled as she gave him a dumbfounded expression, “didn’t ask that, you juvenile,” you couldn’t help but laugh at her comeback. 

“fine, we’ll try it, just so we can hurry this up and get back to the rest of the class,” you told him as Bakugou annoyingly agreed. 

the two of you placed your hands on this small controller thing and squeezed the red handle of the controller. it took a few minutes but you were immediately startled by the ringing noise coming from the machine. 

“oh my,” she whispered as she looked at the machine, “what?” you could tell Bakugou was becoming increasingly more annoyed as the lady was silent, “not only did the two of you reach 100, the two of you read for marriage,” your eyes widened at her epiphany. 

you couldn’t dare to look at Bakugou as he scoffed, “wow, I’ve been doing this for ten years and you two have been the only ones to reach 100,” she continued as you tried to usher Bakugou to finally leave. 

“as promised, here are your gifts,” she whispered digging out the matching pair of necklace and bracelet, “are these real gold?” you hesitated on taking the items as she nodded, “as real as they get. it’s truly an honor,” she exclaimed as she shoved the jewelry into your hands. 

Bakugou and you stared at each other as a red hue crossed Bakugou’s face. your hand gripped the jewelry but you couldn’t muster to say anything to break the awkward silence. 

“crazy old lady,” Bakugou muttered making you laugh, “right? you would think her family would stop her from doing such things,” you replied as he nodded. 

the semi-awkward conversation continued until the two of you finally reached the dorms again. you had texted one of the girls to prepare the few things that were already in the dorms so you could immediately start on dinner. 

“hey, how was everything?” Midoriya asked as you fell silent to question, “fine, why? did you think there would be a problem?” Bakugou asked as the two of them started arguing. 

you rolled your eyes and went to the kitchen to start dinner. your mind had drifted from the interaction from earlier but as you were about to set out the bowls for everyone to pour themselves, you reached into your back pocket and felt the jewelry making your face turn warm. 

“dinner is ready! come pour yourselves!” you yelled to your classmates as you grabbed your already full plate and made your way to the two chaired table. 

everyone grabbed their plates and scouted for chairs and tables to eat. what you didn’t expect again was to see Bakugou sit across from you. you gave him a warm smile making his stomach do a flip. 

he had never felt this way before and frankly, he would have found the idea of liking someone disgusting but being that it was you, Bakugou wasn’t exactly opposed to it.

even though dinner between the two of you was decently quiet, it wasn’t until almost everyone was going back into their rooms when Bakugou finally tried to keep up a conversation. 

“here, I bought this for us to share,” he grunted as he went to the freezer and took out the cake, “I didn’t see you buy it,” you told him as he ignored your statement and brought it to the table. 

while Bakugou would have been embarrassed at such an action, the only ones in the common area were Momo and Kota and he knew that neither one of them would open their mouth to say anything. 

you opened the cake when you snapped your fingers in realization, “the night is quite nice, wanna sit on the table that’s on the patio and eat it?” you asked, a bit shyly. 

he nodded taking the two forks as you grabbed the cake and made your way to the patio table. the good thing about the patio was that there was a small screen like cover on top of the building to not let in any flies or bugs. 

“god, I felt like this is the first time we’ve gotten to relax,” you told Bakugou as he hummed, “with training, school work, and homework, it’s like we only get Saturday to actually relax or catch up on homework,” you added on. 

Bakugou wanted reply but the nervousness, something he hardly felt, was too much to handle. 

“but I’m sure you’re caught up on your work, right?” you asked as he nodded, “everything is fairly easy,” he responded as you shrugged, “ah, I’m struggling a bit in All Might’s class,” you admitted as you tried to hide your embarrassed face. 

Bakugou’s eyes lit up, “I can help you, if you need it,” he managed to say as you agreed excitedly, “sure! are you free tomorrow? after lunch?” you asked as he nodded yes. 

“awesome!” you exclaimed as Bakugou tried his hardest to hide his very flustered expression, “hey, so I still have this shit in my back pocket. if what the lady said was true, I just don’t want to throw it away,” you told Bakugou as you put the necklace and bracelet on table. 

he grabbed the more masculine looking one, the bracelet, and slapped it over his wrist, “we can get this shit tested,” he inquired as you nodded, “right! I mean, I think the necklace is really pretty,” you said as you wrapped it around your neck. 

Bakugou watched as you struggled to clip the two pieces together and finally got up to do it for you. he snapped the two pieces together and you turned your head to fix your hair, you noticed just how close your faces were. 

taking a deep breath, you gave him a small peck on the lips before quickly retracting. Bakugou sighed in content as he reciprocated the kiss but this time, he lasted a lot longer than you did. 

“we can continue this tomorrow,” he muttered giving you one final peck, “but I’ll text you after I get out of the shower,” he said a bit smugly. 

you rolled your eyes jokingly as the two of you made your way back inside of the dorms. a part of you was glad that you made the first move because god knew how long it would’ve taken Bakugou to make his first move. 

ALITA 

[joheun-saram]

To Make A Power Couple (knj) | 6

Chapter 6: Garlic Pasta and I miss you-s

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Summary- Namjoon visits his parents and Yoongi and Y/N bond over their past.

word count- 4.5k

pairing- idol!namjoon x ceo!reader

rating- R

genre- series, fluff, angst, action, slightly smutty, strangers2lovers

warnings- drinking, talk of mental health and panic attacks, violence, blood, stalker

a.n- sorry for this chapter being late! i had major burn out this last few weeks but I finally got it out. Tell me what you think!

taglist - @beach-bitch-bitch-beach, @sscheherazadee, @rjsmochii , @jinjccns​ , @joyful-jimin @sideblogger @agustdpeach @diamonddia-mond

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“I hate you Kim Namjoon! Get out!”

Namjoon looks at you with an amused smile as he drops his bags at the door of your bedroom. You’re sitting in your bed, your comforter fully around you, even on top of your head, as you loudly blow your nose, some show blaring on the television. Even though he feels bad about passing on his cold to you, he can’t help but find your red nose and whining adorable. The past few months since Namjoon returned from tour had been few of the best you’d had in Korea. Although you both still had remarkably busy schedules, you had found a routine of spending time together at least once a week, usually ending your Saturdays together to spend as much of the Sunday together as possible. It didn’t matter how you spent your time, whether it was spent going out on dates or sitting silently reading or cuddling, all that mattered was that you were together. 

“Aw baby, I’m sorry!” He sat on the edge of the bed, wrapping his arms around your burittoed body. He kissed all over your face obnoxiously, much to your chagrin as you groaned and tried to get him off you, worried to get your snot on him. “Okay. Tell you what. I’ll cancel going to my parents and stay here to take care of you!” He punctuated that with another kiss on your lips. Hey, he’d already suffered through this cold, might as well take advantage of being able to be near you now.

“No! Shut up! You’re not cancelling.” Since things were slower at work, the company had decided to give Namjoon and the boys the week off. He had spent the first day with you, going to the most recent Ji Hye Yeom exhibit yesterday, and was going to go visit his family for the next four days. When Namjoon told you he was planning to spend the majority of his vacation with his parents, he was bracing himself for a negative reaction, a learned response from his previous relationship. His ex would always hate that he would visit his family for extended periods when he got time off and wouldn’t prioritize his relationship with her. He was surprised and relieved to hear you not only excited that he was visiting family but encouraging him to spend more time, upping his initial ask of two days to four. He liked that you always encouraged him to call his mom when he was on tour, as did his mom, so much so that she had started to say ‘my beautiful daughter’ whenever she referred to you in front of him.

Namjoon stood up as he watched you rant about the importance of visiting family, one arm out from your duvet heaven as you waved it about to emphasize your points. He almost giggled at how endearing you looked sniffling through your tirade, hair a mess and voice a little hoarse. Taking off his jeans to get comfortable, he chuckled at your wide eyes and dramatic gasp.

“No! We’re not having sex right now you maniac!” You whine as you lie down with the covers over your head. Namjoon gets into bed, pulling the comforter from over you to sneak inside, his arms snaking around your grumbling form to pull him to his chest. Although you complained, you snuggled into him, feeling the safe comfort that only Namjoon provided you.

“I just wanna nap with you before I leave.” He kissed the top of your head as he tangled your legs with his. You poked your head up from where it was hiding in his chest to look up at his smiling face as he cupped your cheek to place a chaste kiss on your lips. Caressing the skin once he leans away, he looks at you adoringly.  “Sorry for getting you sick, baby.”

----------------------------------

“Your boyfriend is a tyrant. Please never get sick again.” Yoongi took off his beanie and mask and shook his head to fluff his hair as you went through your phone to finish placing the order for takeout. After talking to Namjoon about how you had spent all of yesterday recovering, and even facetiming to ensure him that you were fit enough to be working again, he still didn’t believe you, forcing the only member of his band that was in Seoul during his vacation to make sure you were truly alright. You would be annoyed if your heart didn’t skip a beat at his overt concern. You were glad to spend time with Yoongi - he was pretty similar to you and you both had been slacking on hanging out lately. A few months ago you had decided to host a whiskey exchange where you would share bottles of your favourite liquor together, only for it to fall apart after two hangouts due to your busy schedules and Yoongi’s new relationship. It was nice to be in his company again, his mellow energy a great contrast to your usually loud friends.

“What did he say?” You question, laughing. Yoongi had called Namjoon many funny nicknames before but hearing him call him a tyrant made you laugh, picturing your boyfriend getting stern and demanding someone pay you a visit. 

“You wanna see?” Yoongi chuckled as he pulled his phone out, navigating to the group chat and handing it to you. You couldn’t help but smile as you read Namjoon pleading to the group to check in on you, asking if anyone was around. Yoongi said he was around but refused only to relent once the other boys pressured him and Namjoon pulled in a favour Yoongi owed him from 2015.

“Ooof. Honestly, it’s not that bad. Good to know Jungkook would literally kill for me though, and that you hate to hang out with me.” You threw an ice cube at him from where you were putting them in your glasses. 

“He wouldn’t. He’s just a suck up.” He dodged your attack, sticking his tongue out in triumph. “And you know I had to make Namjoon suffer a bit.”

Rolling your eyes at him as he smirked, you watched him pull out his bottle from his backpack. Your Craigellachie 16 no match for his Glenfiddich 30, you chastised him for buying such an expensive bottle for just the exchange. However, you were not going to say no to a glass of that and the two of you sat in a comfortable silence as you enjoyed your drinks. You were the first to break the silence. 

“How’s your bae?”

“Oh haven’t you heard? Bae is no more! Broke my heart and left me to suffer.” Yoongi scowled as he dramatically grabbed his chest, before downing his drink. If you didn’t know any better you would’ve thought he was joking but his usual deadpan was missing. 

“Shit… I’m sorry Yoongs.” You looked at him softly, making him scoff.

“It’s fine. Going to get a sick album out of this.” Yoongi waved you off, as he reached in his backpack again to bring out three bottles of soju. “Let’s get drunk!”

“That’s… one way of looking at things. You want to talk about it?” You knew he didn’t want to talk about it, it was probably still fresh and you didn’t want to impose but you wanted to give him the opportunity to share if he wanted to.

“Nah it’s fine. It was the usual anyways. ‘You’re always busy.’ ‘Why won’t you share your feelings with me?’ ‘Do you love me more or your career?’ I say good riddance.” He scoffed once again as he poured himself some more whiskey, sipping it blissfully.

“Well good to know you’re not hiding your pain.” You narrowed your eyes at him, but decided to get drunk with him anyways, taking up his offer to refill your glass. You had an extremely light day at work tomorrow with it being Friday and all, plus you knew that once Yoongi got drunk he would tell you how he was feeling. He was a very talkative drunk.

“Oh you know it. I’m nothing if not in touch with my feelings!”

Soon you and Yoongi were wasted, sitting on opposite ends of your couch as the television played the ‘important videos’ playlist on Youtube, laughing maniacally at each random short video that popped up. The food you had ordered was sitting on the coffee table, half eaten and getting cold. Having not heard Yoongi’s giggle in a while you looked away from the screen to see him staring into space, a slight frown on his lips.

“Dude. You good?” You poked him with your foot to break him out of his thoughts.

“Yeah. Sorry just realized I’m single again. Fuck.” He looked at you with wide eyes, as if he had just had an epiphany. You frowned at him, sad that he was feeling this way. In the past six months, you had come to learn that although Yoongi often talked about how much he loved being alone, in reality he put a lot of pressure on himself to find someone to be with.

“You know you’re worth more than a relationship, right?” You placed your hand on his, smiling reassuringly.

“Don’t go all Dr. Phil on me. I’m not that sad. It was like two months but it felt nice to call someone mine, you know?” He rolled his eyes at your concern, but held your hand tighter as he finished his sentence, averting his gaze with a melancholic look. He looked at you again sighing. “How did you get over your last breakup?”

“Um… not healthily. I almost sold my company.”

And so for the next hour, you told Yoongi of how messed up your previous relationship had made you. You don’t think you had talked about it in depth about your breakup with Beomseok for years now, but somehow drunk off extremely expensive whiskey and extremely cheap soju it felt natural to share the details about your most toxic relationship with Yoongi. Beomseok and you met when you were initially still in Canada, visiting Seoul in hopes of expanding. You were busy and he tried to help you as you adjusted to a new country, but as your relationship grew so did his tendency to ensure you relied on him. As hard as it was to admit to Yoongi, Beomseok had made you dependent on him, so much so that when he left you after two years of you accommodating him, you broke down. You started having terrible anxiety, using alcohol and cigarettes to take the edge off. Panic attacks became the norm so much so that you had contemplated leaving your position. You couldn’t see your friends, worked from home, and just buried yourself away. It took half a year of self destructive behaviour and for you to wake up in a bed with someone you didn’t remember to knock some sense into you and get yourself into therapy. Yoongi then talked about his own relationship issues, the two of you bonding over your struggles with mental health and shitty coping mechanisms. It was weird to think that Yoongi hadn’t been one of your close friends before this night.

It was around two in the morning by the time Yoongi left and you felt the emotions of the night catch up to you. You hadn’t thought about Beomseok in years, and thinking about him made you feel extremely sad for past you. You didn’t deserve how he treated you and you wished you could go back in time and shake some sense into yourself, and save the heartbreak. Lying in bed, drunk and emotional, you mourned for your old self and her faith in the world. However, looking at your phone you saw the photo of you and Namjoon - him standing behind you with his arm on your shoulder as he pretends to take a bite off your cheek as you grimace - and you were reminded that you were in a much better place now with a much better man. To say you looked forward to Namjoon returning tomorrow would be an understatement.

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Namjoon: I’m back!!!

Namjoon: I miss you!!!

Namjoon: Come over!!!

Namjoon: I’m cooking for you!!!

Y/N: Um… should I call poison control now or later?

Namjoon: I’m back after almost a week and this is the welcome I get?

Y/N: Babeeeee you know I love you!

Namjoon: Prove it. Eat the pasta I’m making

Y/N: Did anyone at least help you cook it?

Namjoon: IT’S GOING TO BE GOOD. COME OVER.

Y/N: Ok ok. No need to yell...

Namjoon: Good. See you in an hour?

Namjoon: I’m at the dorms btw

Y/N: See you soon jooooooonie

Y/N: I miss you too btw

Namjoon: I love you too btw

You punched the code to the dorm and were greeted by a very excited Moni as you entered. The white dog jumping up at your legs, his tail wagging wildly behind him. You bent down in the entryway to give him a few scratches behind his ears, cooing and calling him a good boy. 

“All this love for Moni, what about Joonie? I’m a good boy too!” You heard Namjoon shout out as you made your way through the large living room towards the kitchen, Moni playfully following. 

“Aww is my good boy jealous?” You set your eyes on your boyfriend huddled over a cutting board, concentrating hard on cutting what seemed to be garlic, his jaw set. Namjoon was dressed in a blue overalls under which he wore a black sweater, the hood atop his head, the hair of which was now back to his natural dark brown, his nose scrunched as he attempted to keep his glasses from slipping. You don’t know if it was not seeing him for a while or the fact that he looked so cuddly, but you felt butterflies, your stomach somersaulting. You hadn’t felt them since the beginning of your relationship, and you were a bit unnerved that he still had that effect on you six months later. 

“Holy shit. You look like a hot minion!” You almost yelled as you walked towards him, startling him enough to look at you with wide eyes under his black rimmed glasses and yelp.

“Don’t scare me like that! I almost cut my hand off!” He tried to glare at you but was soon smiling widely as you ducked under his arm to stand directly in front of him between the counter, putting your arms around his neck as you pulled him into a kiss. It felt amazing to have his plush lips against yours again, his familiar scent enveloping your senses till it felt like you were drunk off of him. 

“I missed you,” you whispered against his lips. Your hands found your elbows as you pulled him in closer and deepened the kiss, making him moan, his tongue massaging yours as his hands went to your hips, pulling you to him. Before you could lose all your senses you felt a sharp poke on your lower back, and you reluctantly pulled away to look behind you.

“Joonie! You’re still holding the knife!” You said in alarm as his eyes widened again and he dropped it on the counter immediately before looking at you sheepishly and apologizing. “Control yourself. I don’t want to spend the night in the hospital!”

“Then stop distracting me! Go sit there and watch me make you the best pasta of your life.” He smirked and his eyes followed as you moved around the island to sit at the stool, bending down to pet Moni as he settled at your feet. Namjoon knew he was a terrible cook, but he had spent the time at home perfecting this recipe, subjecting his mom to the first few horrible tries, till he figured it out. It was a simple five ingredient dish but it was the first he’d learn and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to impress you. You always cooked for him, from experimental recipes you had found online to traditional Korean food that was second best only to his mom’s, and though he was always happy to do the dishes, he wanted your reunion to be special. He cooked almost quietly, blushing slightly at your words and looks of encouragement, plating it like restaurants would before placing it on the dining table and sitting next to you with a bottle of wine, anticipating your reaction.

“What the fuck? You can cook!” you exclaim as you dig in for another bite. Namjoon lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as he grinned at his success, finally digging into his meal. “I love the garlic. But damn, is this your way of telling me you don’t wanna kiss tonight?”

“Baby, I find even your gross morning breath irresistible, a little garlic’s not gonna stop me.” he laughed and you scowled at him, nudging him with your shoulder, as he leaned over to peck your lips. You weren’t trying to placate Namjoon, this pasta was absolutely delicious, the right amount of seasoning and everything. It warmed your heart that despite his firestarter tendencies he went through the effort to make you a home cooked meal.

As you ate, you talked about your days apart. You recovered from your cold within a day and had been back at work, and even though he scolded you for going back too fast Namjoon loved the way your eyes lit up when you talked about how you had managed to renew a contract with a client today, switching the period from their usual 1 year to 5 years. You had been working on this for a whole month, taking it upon yourself to attend meetings with not only the directors of this company but even the interns. He squealed with you at your success, high-fiving you and finding your excitement extremely adorable. You also talked about how after two bottles of soju Yoongi had finally admitted you were now his closest female friend and he agreed that you both should now tease him about it relentlessly.

Namjoon told you about how excited everyone was to have him home for that extended period of time, and how healing it was to be around them after the cacophony of tour. Apparently his sister had recently started learning how to make loom bracelets and he showed off the purple one on his wrist, telling you about how he had a matching one for you in his bag. Namjoon looked refreshed and you were glad you convinced him to spend the extra time home. He had also managed to bring back another bonsai tree to add to his collection, taking the time to explain how in a few years he could potentially tap the mini maple for some syrup. The image of your clumsy boyfriend trying to tap a tiny tree made you laugh. As the conversation continued and you both finished your food, you saw his mood dip a little. You silently lean forward cupping his face, as he nuzzles into your touch.

“My beautiful, hardworking boy. What’s wrong?” You coo with a soft smile on your face as your thumbs stroked his cheekbones and he pouts exaggeratedly before his hands go around your waist pulling you into his lap.

“I missed you.” He whispers as he nuzzles his face in your chest, his arms tightening around you. Namjoon felt cocooned in your sweet floral vanilla scent, and even though he’d been home just this morning, this felt like home too - just being in your embrace. He felt his heart swell with adoration as you stroked his hair slowly, whispering affirmations into his ear, slowly forgetting his worries about not spending enough time with you. 

Usually when you both met after being apart, it was all desperation to get naked, but for the first time this felt much more intimate. He could hear your heartbeat and it soothed him. He suddenly envisioned both of you old and weathered in each other’s arms and he couldn’t fight the grin that made it on his face. He showered you in kisses, moving from your chest to your neck to your jaw and finally to your lips, where he stayed, kissing you firmly as his arms wind tighter around your waist. You lost yourself in his touch, wanting nothing more to be consumed by him as you tugged lightly at his hair, swallowing his moans. Before things could escalate you get startled by a loud thud. 

“Wow! Right where we eat!” Jimin clicked his tongue in disapproval, as you both sheepishly stared at him. 

“Noona!” Jungkook exclaimed as he came over to Namjoon and you, dragging you into a hug as he kissed the top of both of your heads. The two men seemed overly excited, and as Namjoon explained to you how he thought he was alone in the dorms tonight since no one has been around in weeks, the two interrupted to say that they had come to start a movie marathon, hoping to stay up all night since they had the day off tomorrow to marathon the Batman franchise as they had a bet going on as which one was the best.

“Do you guys want to join us?” Jimin asked politely as he munched on leftover pasta on the table. You excitedly opened your mouth to speak but before you could get a word out, Namjoon looked at you sternly.

“Nope.” He refused the boys as he looked at you, leaning in close to whisper in your ear before he nipped at it. “Baby, ignore your obsession with Batman. I want my dessert.” His voice was a few octaves lower than usual and his words made you shiver, a blush creeping up your face as a nervous giggle escaped your lips. Maybe you could skip rewatching these old movies, just once.

Bidding a quick goodbye to the boys and ignoring their smirks, you both made your way to Namjoon’s room. As soon as you were out of sight, Namjoon pulled you into another kiss, slotting your lower lip between his, making your heart race as he walked you down the hallway towards his room. You almost tripped over his bags haphazardly strewn in front of his door.

“Sorry, didn’t have time to go to my room yet.” He chuckled against your lips as his grip on your hips stabilized you. You giggled as you turned around to open his door, his lips on your neck instantaneously as he rubbed his growing bulge against your butt. His touch had you breathless as you moved in his room, Moni following closely behind you. Removing himself from you he picked up his dog and moved him outside murmuring an apology to the whining canine as he shut the door.

Without wasting any time, he pinned you against the door, your makeout session getting heavy. Your eyes were screwed shut as you mewled, his lips along your neck igniting a fire in you. Your hands moved from his hair to the buckles of his overalls, snapping them off as they fell to the ground unceremoniously. “Oh look! Easy access!” you exclaimed as he smiled against your skin.

His lips met yours again, his hands kneading the flesh of your sides under your shirt. You could kiss him like this forever, the way his tongue explores your mouth as if he doesn’t already know every crevice of your body, as if he’s worshipping you. His kiss slows down, turning from a sloppy fiery heat to intentional moves made to make you moan as he moves you towards the bed, dropping you to the middle as soon as your knees hit the back of the bed. He stands above you removing his shirt with one hand as you move backwards and soon he’s slotting himself between you. 

“Fuck I love you.” He whispers as he kisses your cheek, moving towards your ear. You moan loudly as he grinds against you. Your hands run over his back, feeling the muscles as he continues to kiss your neck, biting it before soothing it with wide licks of his tongue. You used to be embarrassed by the marks he left behind but somehow as time passed you craved them. Jiyoung had even nicknamed him your vampire, and you’d be lying if that didn’t make you giddy. 

Realizing you were still fully dressed you pushed at his chest, making him lie next to you as you straddled him, one of your knees almost slipping off the edge of the bed. You giggle at your clumsiness as he holds your hips to steady you and you slowly unbutton your shirt. As your skin becomes visible he runs his hands up your stomach to your chest, squeezing each breast as he reaches your neck before pulling your face to his. 

“Mhmm… my pretty girl.” He almost growls as he pulls you into another heated kiss, his hands cupping your face as you grind on him. Suddenly you feel a tug at your hair, making you moan into his mouth, breaking the kiss. Before you know it you are on the floor, laughing at your clumsiness as you see his confused face, eyes still closed, lips puckered.

However, your laughter dies as you hear a loud screech. That’s when you feel that your hair was still being tugged as you looked up to see a tall, bulky woman, probably in her late thirties calling you a slut. Before you can even register what is happening you feel a sharp pain across your face as you realize you’ve just been punched. You taste the iron before you notice drops of bright red on your chest. 

You cup your nose with one hand as you hear chaos ensue. Namjoon yelling your name as Moni barks loudly outside the room. You are aware that you are still lying on the floor but your eyes refuse to open as you hear scuffling before the door being slammed and Jungkook’s voice. 

Everything’s a blur and you hear a loud blood curdling scream. Before you can register that that noise came from your mouth you hear your arm snap just as the most pain you have ever felt in your life turns your arm numb. You don’t remember much after, only grunts and shouts of your name. The last thing you hear is Namjoon’s voice calling your name repeatedly as he holds your head.

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[sweetestlamb]

Lighting Up Your World (Forever)

MoonMun Wedding Special! 

Summary: "Are you crying?" She teases, "I never thought I'd marry a crier."He scoffs denying her accusation, stealthily wiping a lone tear. "I'm not crying."She looks at him skeptically, before smirking mischievously, "Mmmm you do look so pretty when you cry though.

Author’s Note: These are still not all the details I wanted for the wedding but unfortunately life is catching up with me and I go back to work on Tuesday, this means I won’t have much free time to write. Wrote the majority of this today in one sitting, so I’m sorry if it feels rushed (it kinda was lol) I hope you guys enjoy this! This might be my last story for a while, but I promise to try to write some drabbles here and there and help keep this beautiful fandom alive. Thank you guys for the best summer, I had the best time!! 

"We looked so happy." He says aloud, fondly looking at their smiling faces shining back at him, the light from his phone glowing in the dark of the room. He'd taken a selfie of Mun-yeong and himself after her first successful swim, it'd taken her five tries but she had succeeded, battled her demons and came out stronger albeit wetter as well. The pride that had colored her face had to be savored and disregarding any watery harm that could become his phone, he'd hastily snapped a candid picture of them. Her soaking wet from her splashes before something slippery had touched her foot and she'd left the water, declaring it had to be a shark. He'd snickered at her, eyes bemusedly glancing around at the still lake water.

In the photo their faces were pressed together, her rosy cheeks mashed against his own. Her eyes had disappeared into half moons beaming with joy, his smile was free and unguarded. He almost didn't recognize himself. Happiness unnatural on his face.

A year ago, driving aimlessly with her had ironically led him to finding himself. It wasn't an epiphany per say, there was no definitive moment that unconcealed his inner being. Rather he'd seen the extent of himself, how happy he could be if he allowed happiness in. If he stopped slamming the door shut every time he felt glee running through his veins. She'd been the first bang at his door and hadn't stopped since they met. The trip was once in a lifetime. He'd fallen for her long ago but seeing her on that trip made him truly understand what love was. What it meant to love her. All-consuming.

They weren't perfect, they still fought. Slamming doors and crashing into the van walls tangled as they ripped their clothes off and fell into angered fits of passion. They worked on apologizing with words too instead of actions, but at times actions spoke louder for both. They also smiled so much so his cheeks ached from it, holding her in his arms felt like a gift. It was the best time of his life, he embraced the good and the bad.

She shuffles in the bed, rolling into him and accidentally knocking the phone from his hands. Simultaneously knocking him back into reality. Even in the depths of slumber demanding his full attention. He can't control the loving way his eyes peruse her face, gorgeous under the soft moonlight trickling in through their sheer curtains.

After the trip the thought of sleeping without seemed unfathomable and surprising him once more Sang-tae had been the one to encourage him to move into her room. "I'm an adult, I can't share a room with my little brother. See if Mun-yeong wants you, I need space. I'm an adult Moon Gang-tae, you can't sleep in my room." His brother uttered those words as he'd pushed him out the door of said room, his meager belongings stuffed haphazardly into a book bag. He feigned indignation before all but skipping to join Mun-yeong in her, no their new room. 

Her smile when she came in and saw him putting his clothes away in an empty drawer had been so beautiful, so soft and vulnerable. He didn't fight the urge to collect her into his arms, as they fell into bed. He was right where he was always meant to be.

A year later, he's still here. With his first love, his only love. His heart beat. His bulldozer. His tempest.

"Aishhh... Why are you awake? Do you want to have some fun? Again?" Her sleep raspy voice is filled with mischief and promise as she presses her naked body into his own slipping from slumber into consciousness with seductive ease. 

Putting the phone away he turns to her, eyes bright as he leers down at her offering. After a lifetime spent refusing the things he wanted most, he's ready to be indulgent, greedy even. Slowly he crawls over her, warm bodies melting into each other, her legs parting under his weight as he slides into the space given. A soft gasp falls from her swollen lips as he caresses her hip, fingers trailing in exploration.

"I like playing with you." Her eyes crinkle at his words, adorable half moons greeting him. Without hesitation he captures her mouth in a deep languid kiss, tongue parting her flesh and swallowing her subsequent moan. Capitalizing on her distracted state, he drags his hand down to her treasure, sighing as he feels her warm wetness. Arousal washes over him as her moistness coats his fingers as he penetrates with the tips of his fingers. Beneath him she writhes in pleasure, drawing him closer as she grinds on his hand.

Shifting he maneuvers himself, hard erection at her opening, their eyes meet as he breaks their kiss.

"I love you Ko Mun-yeong."

He means it. Loves her with every fiber of his being, and spontaneity spurs him on, driving his words. With a deep thrust he fills her, his name a sermon on her lips as her hands wraps around his neck.

"Marry me?"

Her eyes are clouded with desire, so much so that at first his inquiry only elicits stillness as her brain processes his word. He watches mesmerized as her eyes fill with tears, love leaking down her cheeks. A quiet sob shatters his heart but her answer sews it back together.

"Only you would turn sex into a marriage proposal." Her breathing increases as he draws back longer to plunge deeper into her, eyes ravaging her face. When she discloses no more words, lost in their tangled limbs and the incessant motion of him driving into her, he draws out completely, tip teasing her folds.

He chuckles at her annoyed huff, catching her hands as she tries to drag him back into their dance.

"This is emotional manipulation." She glares at him, enticing breasts jiggling from her long suffering inhale.

He shrugs, "You've done worst. You almost ran me over one time." Cutting off her rebuttal, he presses a single digit to her mouth, grabbing her hand and removing the promise ring he placed one year ago.

She watches with rapt eyes as he meets her gaze once more, "Mun-yeong, will you marry me?"

Emotions swirl in her eyes, underneath the love he sees wonder and...doubt.

"I mean it. I really want to. I want you forever. I'm ready to turn that promise ring into your engagement ring. What do you think about forever?"

Her smile is bright enough to blind him, "Okay. Forever sounds like a good start." With gentle hands he places the ring back, perfectly fitting on the marked skin of her finger. The ring looks more beautiful than it did seconds ago, its purpose renewed.

After a not so gentle nudge, he laughs sliding back into her. They fall into a slow searching rhythm, her legs tightly wrapped around his waist as he thrusts into her.

"If you ever try to leave me I'll break your legs and drag you back." She promises.

He laughs louder, her declaration like a love letter. Their lovemaking somehow sweeter now and they find pleasure and solace in each other's warmth.

You're so warm.

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"Hyung, I have to tell you something."

Sang-tae glances at him momentarily, the scratches of his pencil on his notepad loud in the silence of the living room. The verbal confirmation that his brother has heard his words is a slight mmm he receives in response.

Taking a deep assuring breath he says with a nervous grin, "I'm going to marry Mun-yeong." Saying the words aloud forces a awkward laugh to explode from his chest.

He's marrying Mun-yeong.

His brain still struggles to wrap around that staggering reality. The urge to pinch himself to see if he's in a dream rises over him.

The pencil scratches pause and he hears the soft pat of the utensil hitting the pad and in a matter of seconds his brother is a ball of animated excitement.

"Married? My little brother is getting married? I'm so happy! When? I can't believe my little brother is getting married! I always took care of you but now you will be Mun-yeong's problem. Not mine."

He chuckles at his brother's pure reaction, ignoring the smidgen offense he feels at the latter part of his brother's exclamation, he's not a problem. If anything those two will be the death of him.

"We didn't set a date yet. I only proposed last night, I wanted you to be the first person I told."

His heart swells up when his brother jumps out of his seat to pull him into a tight embrace, Sang-tae has come a long way in showing affection. Giving him hugs and back pats on a regular now, he never knew how much he longed for that closeness with his brother until he received it. It makes him speechless every time his brother initiates a hug.

After a few seconds of their warm embrace he feels his brother pulling away, then he says, "I have to go tell Mom. She should be the second one to know, she's going to be so proud. Moon Gang-tae is getting married. You're an adult too."

"Let's all go tell her together."

When he enters the room to ask Mun-yeong to join them in telling their mom, he finds her at her vanity looking effortlessly glamorous in a bold yellow silk dress, although she's in front of the mirror her eyes are locked on her hand, her ring more precisely.

He watches her silently captivated by her and the open awe that is filling her eyes to a brim. She lightly touches the ring with her index finger seemingly lost in the glimmer of the diamond.

"Hi." He breathes out, chest tight with emotion.

Slowly she turns to look at him, those eyes now directed at him and he can feel her love surrounding him like a thick wool blanket.

Holding out a hand he says softly, "We're going to tell my mom about our wedding. Let's go."

Without even a moment of hesitation she takes his hand, smiling tenderly at him. He draws her into his arms, engulfing her in his strong arms. He sniffles as he breaths in the fresh floral scent of her hair, magnolia sweet.

"Are you crying?" She teases, "I never thought I'd marry a crier."

He scoffs denying her accusation, stealthily wiping a lone tear. "I'm not crying."

She looks at him skeptically, before smirking mischievously, "Mmmm you do look so pretty when you cry though.

A vibrant red blush blooms on his cheeks as he coughs at her praise, still not comfortable with direct compliments or comments on his looks.

She gleefully watches him squirm before grabbing his hand, "Lets go pretty boy, we have a wedding to plan."

The drive to the hospital is boisterous as Sang-tae and Mun-yeong cheerfully discuss the wedding, he merely listens and nods along. Content just hearing how excited they are.

When they tell his mother about his upcoming nuptials, the tears flow freely. When Mun-yeong trails off to fix her makeup in the bathroom and Sang-tae wonders off to greet the patients in the hospital he has a private moment with his mother.

"Mom. I wish you were here, I miss you so much. Mom, I'm scared. I know you didn't mean to but I grew up thinking you only had me to take care of hyung. I'm so happy right now it scares me. I don't know if I deserve this. If I deserve her." He falls to his knees, suddenly a stray leaf falls on his shoulder and he looks at his mother in surprise.

Blinking through his tears he hiccups, "Thank you mom. I'm going to be happy. I'm going to live a life you would be proud of." With a final sob he stands, putting his mother's leaf in his pocket.

The drive home is quiet, emotions saturating the air. There is no need for words.

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"It's too...common." Mun-yeong dismisses another elaborate wedding dress as the store clerk runs off to bring her another.

Ju-ri and her mother watch in genuine shock, the dress in question was anything but common with it's pearl detailing and mile long train. They'd both been similarly baffled when the writer pulled up to their house and announced her wedding and demanded that they all go dress shopping. 

Ju-ri felt her mom's wary eyes on her face, gauging her reaction. Their was none except happiness, she'd long given up her crush on Gang-tae, Sang-in's persistence wearing down her walls. He wasn't perfect but he made her feel special and Gang-tae had never done that. She'd also come to consider Mun-yeong a friend, finally recognizing that she never hated her, jealousy had been the driving force in their antagonistic relationship.

So she'd been honored when Mun-yeong had invited them to choose her dress, even inviting Seung-jae along, the art director squealing in excitement at the news of nuptials.

To no shock to anyone, Mun-yeong's taste was extravagant and every gown that had been shown to her simply didn't meet her high standard.

She watched with sad eyes as Mun-yeong seemed to gravitate to her mom, wordlessly asking for her opinion with her eyes. They had grown close in the past year, at times she found the two together in the house after work, her mother nagging Mun-yeong about eating as she piled food onto her plate. Mun-yeong would grumble about her persistent nagging but every Thursday like clockwork they would have dinner together.

Mun-yeong walks out in another jaw-dropping gown, off the shoulders with a cinched waist and full dress, resembling a princess from a fairy tale. They all ohh and ahh at her, sans her mom who merely looks inquisitively, eyes locked on Mun-yeong's face.

The store clerk is all praise and compliments, flowery words bursting free like a dam, "You look gorgeous! This is the dress! Your husband will be blown away!"

Mun-yeong looks over her shoulder, face impassive as she peers at her vision. Unimpressed she responds, "My husband will be blown away by my face alone."

Ju-ri chuckles under her breath at the clerk's barely concealed annoyance.

Her mother speaks up, "Try the next dress I picked it out. I think it's quite lovely." Mun-yeong's eyes are shining as she goes to the dressing room, Ju-ri is certain that dress will be the one.

The dress is exquisite, the bodice immaculately detailed with embroidered floral swirls that bleed into the body of the dress, which is equally gorgeous with effervescent sheer material that falls in powdery waves, bellowing up when she twirls around with a radiant smile on her face.

"Wow." They all gasp at her, knowing that this will be her dress. This dress was meant for her, they're all in agreement.

No one mentions how that dress was taken from the hands of another hopeful bride, how Ju-ri had distracted the woman as her mother sneakily took the dress and snuck in his Mun-yeong's dressing room. Then Seung-jae had innocently stared at the woman convincing her that no such dress had been there, as they all giggled and left her to her confusion.

Ju-ri begins to pack up ready to leave the store before Mun-yeong speaks, "We're not done yet." She suppresses a sigh they'd been at the store for hours now, Mun-yeong scaring off the first two clerks who had attempted to help her. The first bringing a dress so plain and unappealing that Mun-yeong had declared she was trying to sabotage her wedding before threatening to twist her neck. It was a wonder they were not instantly removed.

"You all need to get dresses too especially you Ju-ri, I can't trust you to not show up to my wedding looking like a country bumpkin." They glare at each other as Mun-yeong's eyes run up and down her outfit-a frumpy but comfortable t-shirt and loose jeans- in disdain.

"Yah! Don't insult my sweet daughter!" Her mother rushes to her defense yanking Mun-yeong's ear harshly.

"I'm not insulting her! It's the truth she dresses like a little boy!"

Ju-ri laughs loudly as her mother's grip tightens as she punishes Mun-yeong. Basking in the chaos around her.

Hours are spent until they all have dresses for the wedding, Mun-yeong slamming her card down ignoring her mother's protest as she pays for everything.

The small smile on her face reveals how important this trip was to her, how significant they’d all come to be in each other’s life. 

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She gets a call from one of Gang-tae's university friends imploring that she come and collect her wasted fiancee. She rushes to the car, knowing that the ants will be even more insistent in his drunken state, driving at a breakneck speed she arrives in no time.

All eyes dart to her as she enters, casually dressed in a denim mini dress and knee high brown boots, ridiculously tiny Louis Vuitton handbag dangling from her wrist.

"Mun-yeong! Hey! That's my fiancee! She's so beautiful..." Gang-tae's slurred voice grabs her attention, easily identifying him in a corner of the dingy bar. She makes sure not to touch anything as she approaches their table.

Gang-tae's friend wave sheepishly at her as she eyes the exorbitant amount of empty beer and soju bottles on the table. He'd promised to stay within his limit which they'd found was embarrassingly low, from his vivid scarlet cheeks it was evident that he did not keep his word.

"Are you trying to kill him before we get married?" They all flinch jumping at the low cold register of her voice, frozen under her glare.

"Yah! Don't glare at my friends, they're scared of you already." Gang-tae chastises her, pulling her into his lap, pressing a wet peck on her cheek. She smacks his shoulder complaining about the heavy stench of alcohol on his breath.

"You said you were only going to have two beers. Why are you so drunk? You're so annoying."

"They kept buying me more, it's not my fault." He whines, head falling on her shoulder, warm breath tickling her neck.

One of Gang-tae's friends finally speaks up, the only one brave enough to do so, "That's not technically true. We bought you two beers and tried to cut you off you demanded more."

His bravery seems to embolden the rest who all nod and hum in agreement, another speaking up, "And you started drinking our beers."

"Then you started singing about your pretty fiancee and how much you loved her and wanted to kiss--"

Gang-tae slams a hand on the table, flushed face hiding his blush but his red ears reveal the truth, "I wasn't screaming.... It's this room. Everything echoes, I sound louder here."

She looks at him in disbelief, containing the smile that's itching to come out. He's so cheesy. Maintaining her icy facade she pretends to be bothered by his actions.

Before she can pin them under another icy glare, the waitress appears next to them, "Just checking on you all, do you need anything else?" She asks, eyes slightly widening when she sees Mun-yeong perched on Gang-tae's lap. Signs of a hungry disillusioned ant.

"Gang-tae?.." immediately Mun-yeong's eyes narrow at the waitress lack of honorifics, far too familiar addressing her fiancee.

"Do you know my fiancee that well? You're speaking to him very casually."

"You're fiancee...I didn't know.." She trails off blushing as she glances at the ground.

The waitress flounders under her hard stare as she grabs the lone knife on the table, using it to punctuate her next words, "Consider this your first and only warning then, don't salivate over my fiancee. Or I'll cut out your tongue." She stabs the knife into the table, smiling serenely as everyone looks at her in horror.

Grabbing her mouth the girl rushes away before inquiring if anyone else needs anything.

"Mun-yeong ah I told you to stop threatening people. She's nice she always gives me free drinks."

She jolts at the revelation, hopping out of his lap and grabbing his arm, "We're leaving right now. You are not allowed to come back here ever again."

Without a word to his friends at the table who are watching with gaped mouths, she drags him from the bar shoving him into the driver's seat, angrily buckling him in.

After a few minutes driving he breaks the silence.

"Are you jealous?" He smirks at her.

"Shut up." She retorts, making sure to accelerate over speed bumps.

Then somewhere along the drive she starts to feel his hands caressing the naked skin of her thigh. When she gazes over she meets his glossy unfocused eyes, she looks down at the wondering hand with a raised eyebrow.

"What are you doing?"

Running his hands even higher, he looks at her with innocent eyes, "Nothing."

Rolling her eyes she looks back at the road, trying her best to ignore his provocations.

Her breath hitches as his fingers reach the edge of her panties. She wiggles in her chair in complete shock at his bold move.

"You're really drunk aren't you?"

He hums in response, fingering at her panties, poking under to meet naked skin.

"I wanted to do this as soon as I saw you come in. You've been wearing shorter dresses lately. It's driving me crazy."

She's flabbergasted at his confession, completely unaware that he paid attention to what she wore.

"Are you doing this on purpose? Are you trying to tease me?" He sticks his hand inside the thin lace of her underwear, nudging at her warmth, her eyes roll in the back of her head.

She's unprepared for his finger to suddenly sink into her, as he leans dangerously over the console to torture her.

"What are you doing?" She hisses trying with all her might to stay in her lane, swerving before righting the car with a firm pull of the steering wheel.

She moans as he sinks in deeper, knuckles deep in her wet center, his eyes enraptured in his own movement under her dress.

"Pull over." He commands leaving no space for a refusal.

She obeys immediately, body vibrating from pleasure.

He unbuckles them both before tugging her dress further up her torso, then tugging her panties down her hips, leaving her bare for his viewing.

"Put your hands on the steering wheel, don't move them."

Her breath stutters at his dark seductive tone, before placing her hands around the steering wheel.

"Good girl." He praises her, rewarding her with two fingers plunging into her empty hole, she groans at the sensation, widening her legs tempting him to take more. He raises to the challenge, thrusting into her harder, curling his fingers to scrape at her walls.

"Please, please." She begs, thrashing in her seat as pleasure coils in the pits of her belly.

"Touch yourself."

Lightning fast, she releases the steering wheel and presses an urgent finger against her swollen nub, rubbing at it roughly, teetering on the edge, his voices shove her over, "Come, my beautiful fiancee come for me."

Her walls clamp down on his fingers, squeezing tight as he continues to thrust into her, eyes locked on her face openly watching her fall apart on his fingers.

She sighs, pressing her head into chair and closing her eyes to savor the euphoric thrill that shoots through her bloodstream.

Her eyes snap open at the soft familiar sound that comes from his direction.

He's snoring, head lolling awkwardly between them fingers still deep inside of her. She can't help the shocked laughter that bursts from her chest.

"I'm marrying a psycho." She chuckles to herself, pushing his hand away and driving back onto the road.

*****************************************************************************************

Planning for the wedding goes off without a hitch, she reluctantly asks Sang-in to be their announcer at the wedding, pushing him away when he begins to obnoxiously cry on her shoulder.

The idiot does find them a beautiful venue, a grand hall overlooking the ocean with outdoor seating and a surplus of cherry blossoms. She complains about the nuisance petals but the way Gang-tae's eyes sparkle when he sees the location makes her decision an easy one.

Every minute detail is organized, all t's are crossed and i's dotted and suddenly it is the day before the wedding.

Her nerves are rampant, conjuring every issue that could plague the long waited day. Gang-tae's exuberance keeps her buoyed through her pessimism, his unwavering love pulling her from darkness and uncertainty.

She's sitting silently on the couch when she hears the front door open, taking a deep breath she calls out, "Gang-tae? Is that you?"

There's no answer and that piques her interest, pushing off the couch she walks to the entrance, calling out again, "Gang ta--"

Her voice tampers off as she sees who's at the door. Forced to look down to meet the huge eyes that are staring up at her, tears pooling before they spill over.

"Miss Witch?" Min-jo's small voice rattles her heart as she stands frozen.

She glanced at Gang-tae in question, they hadn't discussed this at all.

He shrugs with a huge grin on his handsome face, "I know you wrote her letters. I thought you would want her there."

"Can I hug you Miss Witch?" Min-jo pleads hopefully, already stepping into her space.

".....No. Don't touch me."

The brat ignores her, wrapping her thin arms around her knees in a tight embrace.

She doesn't push her away.

Immediately.

Sang-tae is unaffected by the sudden appearance of a small child in the house and happily greets her before dragging her to look at his newest fairy tale book, "Mother Tree".

The castle is bustling with life, joy and laughter, nothing like the home she grew up in.

*****************************************************************************************

The wedding day arrives on a sunny summer day, the sun setting the world ablaze. She forces Gang-tae to get ready in a separate room, recalling an American movie she watched as a young girl. It was bad luck for the bride and groom to see each other before the wedding, they needed all the luck they could get.

Soon-duk pins her hair up, securing the braids she'd carefully twisted into a stylishly messy bun on the top of her head. Tendrils frame her face beautifully as she stares at herself in the mirror.

"Final touch." Ju-ri states pushing the tiara into her hair and lowering the veil to cover her face.

"You look beautiful!" Sang-in claps his hands in excitement, rushing over to peer closer at her. She simply nods in agreement, she does look beautiful no need to state facts.

"How about me? How do I look?" Min-jo curtsies in her hanbok, it had cost a small fortune to have it delivered in just a day but she had no regrets. The girl has squealed in amazement when she showed her the attire.

"You look enchanting, definitely the prettiest girl in the room." Sang-in coos at the child, getting goosebumps from the sudden temperature drop in the room.

"What did you just say? Do you have a death wish?!"

The idiot manager is saved by Jae-su peeking his head in to announce that the wedding is about to begin.

As he locks eyes with her he smiles, "You look...nice. Gang-tae is going to be blown away." She sniffs at his compliment, nodding her thank you.

They all leave the room quietly, patting her on the shoulder as if she's going off to war.

With a final glance in the mirror, she stands up and approaches the door. Ready to begin the next chapter of her life, their life.

*****************************************************************************************

First, Min-jo comes out with a little basket in her arms looking adorable in her hanbok as she throws magnolias petals on the floor.

She grins at him before whispering, "You look like a real prince." He winks at her as she takes her seat in the front aisle.

Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry.

Gang-tae chants to himself, shuffling in his suit, loosening his tie as he waits at the end of the altar. Jae-su announces his bride and his reaction is instant, at the first sight of her moisture runs down his face.

When he sees her finally, time slips away. Time stands still.

She's dazzling in a bellowing white dress that flows with every step she makes, her diamond studded tiara glimmering in the plentiful braids adorning her head. He doesn't breathe the entire time she walks down the aisle, breath stolen by the goddess before him.

He inhales when she stops before him, softly scoffing at him as she holds his hand, "You're already crying." Despite her callous tone she wipes the tears from his cheeks and squeezes his hands in comfort.

"The bride and groom will say their vows." Sang-in announces over the microphone, surreptitiously wiping at his own wet face. There isn't a dry eye in the room. He's in good company.

Taking a settling breath he starts first as they had discussed, "Mun-yeong, being with you has made me the happiest I've ever been. Before you I wasn't living, merely existing. You saw through my lies and saw my deepest desires, you never gave up on me every though I was stubborn. You're the only woman who's ever had my heart. You're my first love and...I want you to be my last."

He watches her lips quiver at his declaration of love, before a single delicate teardrop escapes. He brushes it away, drawing her into a warm embrace letting her find comfort in his arms, "I love you. I love you so much." He whispers into her skin, holding her together as she breaks apart.

With a shuddering breath she draws back, fortifying herself before reciting her vows, "Moon Gang-tae, I grew up never knowing what love was, thinking it was something only others would experience. You are the first person to ever come to my rescue, to treat me like I'm something precious and worth protecting. You gave me a family, for that I'll forever be grateful. I don't know what I did to deserve you but I'll fight for you everyday. I love you."

They gaze into each other's eyes, their relationship flashing before their eyes. Everything they've overcome, all the tears and heartbreak has led them to this moment. Destiny.

"Kiss her." Sang-tae nudges him impatiently.

He smiles listening to his brother, leaning over to lift her veil, revealing her gorgeous face before kissing his wife. Their first kiss as a married couple. He tries to keep it chaste but she's having none of that as she slips her tongue into his mouth.

The sounds of cheers fill his ears as he's kissed passionately.

"The bride and groom will have their first dance." Sang-in announces as the first note of Sam Kim's "Breath" fills the air.

I’ll remember the moment I laughed with you. I’ll remember the time I was holding you.

Her body is smooth temptation against his own, she'd slithered away after the ceremony only to return in a silky white dress that hugged every curve of her body. It would take every bit of control to stop himself from dragging her to the bathroom and ravishing her, the coy smile she flashes at him lets him know she is well aware of her effect.

Wrapping her in his arms, they sway to the haunting romantic lyrics of the song, bodies firmly pressed together.

"You know what this dress is doing to me." He whispers, grabbing at her slightly to release some of the pressure in his pants.

Laying her head against the wide berth of his chest she hums, "I do. I plan on doing this to you for the rest of your life."

He groans at the threat wrapped in a promise.

He's looking forward to it.

Clink. Clink.

Jae-su garners everyone's attention with a sharp tsp of his fork against his champagne glasses. Gang-tae turns away from his wife, they'd been locked in another eye embrace, lost in their own world as they fed each other. 

"I'd like everyone's attention please."

Everyone stops and turns their full focus on Jae-su, Sang-tae hovering on his side, wriggling from his glee.

"Sang-tae and I have a few words to say to our little brother."

"He's not your little brother, he's mine. You're just his friend."

Jae-su sputters, glaring at Sang-tae. "He told me I'm his brother! Let me be apart of your family, stop rejecting me!"

Sang-in clears his throat in the microphone, loudly, eyes locked in Mun-yeong's glowering form, saving them both from her wrath.

Jae-su flinches when he sees the dark glare the bride is sending his way, swallowing nervously he presses on, "I've known Gang-tae for many years, we've been through everything together. When he first met Mun-yeong I wasn't sure what it would lead it. I thought she was a lun--an interesting woman!" He recovers quickly, ""But now I know I've never truly seen Gang-tae smile before, a true smile not his joker smile. Since he's met Mun-yeong his smile is real now. My little brother is truly happy for the first time in his life."

Sang-tae hastily steals the microphone, "You're not our brother." He adds first, making Jae-su sputter defensively before he continues speaking eyes locked on the couple.

"My little brother is a coward, he's never been brave or strong. I protect him all the time because I'm his big brother and it's just job. But Mun-yeong is strong too, she's one hell of a fighter and I know she'll always protect my little brother. We are a family, all of us." He pulls their mother's leaf from his pocket, adamant that their mother should witness the wedding and bringing the leaf with him. 

"Mom and I are so proud of you little brother, you have a wife now. You need to be brave and strong too, always protect her."

Gang-tae sniffles loudly as he listens to his brothers speeches, turning to Mun-yeong with a liquid smile. She only shakes her head before using a handkerchief to wipe his tears, the cloth was for her but he clearly was more in need of it. Spontaneously crying at any given moment. It was sickeningly endearing.

Everyone claps at the speeches, swallowing expensive bubbly champagne as the wedding swings into motion.

The music is loud as they all twirl on the dance floor, Jae-su and Seung-jae screeching into the microphone as they sing over the music blasting from the speakers. Mun-yeong considers cutting their microphone before Ju-ri pulls her away, spinning her around.

Min-jo captures her hand as well, joining them, happily jumping up and down completely out of sync with the music. It takes her a moment of dancing and being forced into picture after picture before she realizes that her husband is missing.

"Where's Gang-tae?" She asks Sang-tae who is drunk after one sip of champagne, he sways lazily to the music, fists pumping in the air.

He stumbles a little before answering her, "He went to the bathroom."

Pushing Min-jo into Ju-ri, she walks away without an explanation, the heat causing her dress to stick to her moist skin. She fans herself as she wonders out to find her wayward husband.

She walks down a dimly lit hallway, wobbly on her heels using the walls to support her as she searches for Gang-tae. She turns into an enclave, turning in a circle before retreating too intoxicated to walk any further.

Then she feels a hand clamp down on her wrist and drag her into a room.

It's the room she used to get ready today, the scent of her own perfume wafts around her making her dizzy.

"Are you looking for me my wife?" She sighs falling into his arms, delighted at the sound of her new title on his lips.

"Yes, where did you go?"

"I couldn't take my eyes off you in this dress....I needed a minute."

She perks up at his words, walking him backwards until he's pressed against the wall. His hands latch onto the satiny smoothness of her hip.

He groans at the invitation in her eyes, "They'll notice we're gone."

She shrugs nonchalant as she tugs at his bow tie, "You'd better be quick then."

He stares blankly before spinning them around and slamming her into the wall, immediately devouring her champagne flavored lips. Tongue swiping and plunging into her slack mouth, groaning at her firm grind into his erection.

Her fingers trail down his chest, stroking his abs before reaching his fly and tugging his zipper down the metallic sound sinfully loud.

He loses his mind when he slips his hand under her dress and meets bare hot skin. She'd been dancing all night with no panties.

"Mun-yeong, what are you doing to me?" He whimpers, fingering her and grunting when she readily accepts his invasion, spreading her legs wide and riding his finger. 

"I told you we have to hurry. I've been ready since I saw you in this suit." She tugs him against her, pulling up her own dress to rock into his cock, before spinning around to present herself to his ravenous eyes.

"Come on, husband. Fuck me."

Viciously pulling his length from its cloth prison he takes the rigid flesh in his hands, positioning it at her entrance before sinking into her, his arms planted on the wall beside her head.

The rhythm is immediately brutal, she surges back onto him and he thrusts forward, on edge from watching her all night, envisioning this very moment on loop. Drawing back only to plunge back in, over and over, hands sliding over her mouth smothering her harsh moans.

He twists her head forcing her into a dirty kiss that's all tongue, sucking her moans from her throat before they can escape.

Suddenly they hear voices in the hallway.

"Where did those two go? It's their wedding they can't just disappear." Jae-su complains loudly, whine in his voice.

"They're probably together doing something naughty." Seung-jae replies giggling as astute as usual, much smarter than people give her credit for.

"What? No way! Gang-tae would never do that!" He exclaims dismissing her claim as their voices fade down the hallway.

Gang-tae blushes embarrassment stilling his movement until Mun-yeong sinks back onto him, eyes narrowed as she glares at him.

"If you stop I'll kill you."

As if he could even if he wanted to, it feels too amazing.

The slap of skin against skin is hypnotic as two becomes one.

His balls tighten as he nears the end, he reaches down desperately finding her clit in one motion and rubbing against her until those smooth walls clamp around him, a little slice of paradise.

Pistoning into her wet depths, he falls over the edge groaning at she shakes in his arms, silently tumbling with him, milking him dry. Watching as she drags her nails down the wall, wishing that was his back, craving her marks and the pain.

Next time.

When they stumble back into the reception, he can feel the director's knowing eyes on him. Almost choking on his champagne when he's cornered and interrogated by the shameless ex-director. 

“Why are you smiling like that? Did you get some action?” 

The man slaps him hardily on the back, guffawing at his blush and telling him the wonders of young love and short refraction periods. He contemplates drowning himself in the water outside, but he dismisses the idea knowing his wife would follow him into the afterlife and drag him back only to follow through on her threat to break his legs. 

They dance all night, the stars twinkling above them. Neither seeing the shooting star flying across the sky, neither needing its elusive wish. 

Somehow, they make it home safely, both disgustingly drunk as they fall into their bed. They kisses sloppily until they pass out, clothes thrown on the floor as they pass out in tangled limbs on the plush mattress. 

She refuses to tell him where they are going for their honeymoon. Avoiding his question as she hands over their boarding passes and they get their passports stamped. She covers his eyes to prevent him from seeing where they are ended. 

When they are finally seated in their first class seats, he hears the pilot welcome them aboard and promise a safe trip to Africa. 

Where do you want to go? 

Serengeti. 

All his dreams are coming through because of her. 

[notnctu]

nct 127 as cliche quotes❀

『 nct 127 as cliche quotes about love & some more 』 genre - pure fluff member x gender neutral reader (i tried my best ;-;) [a/n] hi yall this is author doie❀ i really ditched watching my lectures to write this so pls leave me feedback if u like dis bc would really appreciate it hehee i am now behind on school work hahaha i love bad decisions!! 

➳ MOON TAEIL - ❝ i love you to the moon and back ❞

“sugar”, “my only one”, “bubby”, long phone calls, suffocating hugs, goofy dancing to loud music, jumping on the bed, picnics in the field, regular date nights, goodmorning/night kisses, food adventures, light snores, tiny grins at the mention of you, wherever he goes: the sun follows, you are his stars. 

taeil has the whole universe to thank for your simple existence. he’ll take you star gazing and point out everything he loves about you. because if there is anything he loves more in the world, is how his night sky complemented you. His love for you runs deep and stretches far, resonating high in the galaxies. Incomparable lengths of love that cannot be expressed without metaphors. He’s constant reminders of how fitting you two are. he’ll make way for your shining light, even if that meant he disappears during the day. but he’ll always be there for your nights. 

➳ LEE TAEYONG - ❝ love is patient ❞

“darling”, “bub”, “angel”, 3am cuddles to calm your nightmares, hours of gentle whispers of sweet nothings, softest touches, nose kisses, quick pecks on the lip, afternoon naps, long walks in the park hand in hand, he is the light in your darkness.

taeyong would wait until the ends of the earth for your healing. for your journey to self love, he’ll be there every step of the way. he’ll make sure every hurt disappears, if that had to mean small sacrifices of himself. because to him, you always come first. he’ll listen to your complains, he’ll understand your burdens, he’ll remember your heavy sighs. he’s the first call you make in the morning. you are his last call he makes at night. he is meaningful talks and supportive words. he’s the reassurance that never falters. he’s the strength at your weakest.

➳ SUH JOHNNY - ❝ i love you, not only for you what you are, but for what i am when i am with you ❞

“hottie”, “tiny” (regardless of height), “babygirl/boy”, most comforting hugs, humbling conversations, piggy back rides, hand on your thigh while driving, comfy hoodies and pj pants, weekend adventures, long road trips, polaroids, subtle matching outfits, he makes you a better version of yourself. 

johnny’s big heart had the ability to touch even the coldest of people. he’ll hold you in his lap and tell you to reach beyond the stars. he is your number one supporter in every aspect of life, the world’s best hype man. you complement everything. he’s lucky to have you. he wants absolutely no one else in the world, but you. you are an evolution to be explored. he has an attracting personality that you can’t get enough of. he’ll show you the world through his modest lens, correcting your ignorance in the most respectful way. role model, constantly improving. he is your guide through a complex world. 

➳ NAKAMOTO YUTA - ❝ love has no flaws ❞

“cutie”, “love”, “your name”, intense admiring stares, a love that cannot be contained, cheek kisses, kissing to the sunset, happiness at your fingertips, constant teasing, small screams of excitement, honey dripping praises, you are his daydreams.

yuta acknowledges you for who you are, what you make up. there is no effort for change because he genuinely loves you for all of you. to him, you are the perfect human being, where flaws are seen as a part of your beauty. he loves you enough for the both of you. encourages, versus criticism. he has nothing but admiration for your physical attributes and stunning personality. all he needs from you is a simple loving gaze, or a comforting hold. you could do no wrong. you are excellence in your own uniqueness. you are the reasons behind his growing smiles. he never asks for more than needs, though over extends himself to you. he sees you truly for the real you. 

➳ KIM DOYOUNG - ❝ actions speak louder than words ❞

“sweetie/heart”, “honey”, always reaching for your hand to hold, flustered compliments, nervous laughter, sweet red cheeks, dainty promise rings, comfortable silences, homemade dinners, reassuring hand on your knee, your favorite book of poems, thick skin, confused funny facial expressions, you are his comfort.

doyoung often times stammers over his thoughts. he is usually a collected person, but you always break his guard down. he is unspoken words, and sweaty hands. he’s tender touches and quiet looks. the mutual atmosphere of knowing you love each other. Sweet talks on your end, and shy, bashful smiles on his. he’s at your will and call. he’s drop everything for you. he’s daily gestures to minimize inconvenience. if his love for you is questioned, he’d respond with a snarky none of your business. because frankly, he didn’t need anyone else to know besides you how much he loves you. 

➳ JUNG JAEHYUN - ❝ it was love at first sight ❞

“baby”, “princess/prince”, “my dear”, charming smiles, arm around the waist, bouquet of your favorite flowers just because, the sweetest love you’d ever find, shy gazes, butterflies in your stomach, comfort in his cuddles, blissful sugary kisses, don’t blink! or you’ll miss him: he’s every meticulous, beautiful detail of life. 

jaehyun knew the moment he laid eyes on you that he wanted to spend his days with you. on the contrary, he loves your personality the most but never fails to boast about how you are the most beautiful person ever. you take his breath away. he makes your heart race. gets shy at the thought of you, but drones on for hours about how happy you make him. he’s every love language combined into one. he’s sometimes a timid character, a bit shy. you are the center of attention because he loves to see you glow. he knows he’s in love with you. he’s found the only you, who makes him fall in love with life. he’s a happily ever after. 

➳ KIM JUNGWOO - ❝ opposites attract ❞

“bud”, “babe”, “pumpkin”, staying up and loving you until dawn, teary eyed uncontrollable laughter, loud confessions of love, a love so random that it keeps you on your toes, love bites that are purposefully hard to cover, gentle hand squeezes when he holds your hand, adorable sound effects, half of a whole: he completes you. 

jungwoo loves your differences the most. it gives him another perspective to marvel in. bc it gave you two a stronger bond. he didn’t believe in a perfect love --- no --- he believes in hard work and dedication. he knew the day you two met, he was determined to make things work. because he fell in love with everything you were that he was not. you are the caution to his wind. unknowingly, you fill the rest of who he has always admired and wanted to achieve. and together, you two are unstoppable. you are his missing puzzle piece. he is the acceptance you needed. he’s an one in a million. 

➳ LEE MARK - ❝ loving you is too easy ❞

“my person”, “best friend”, “love of my life”, truly a boy next door who falls for the person next door, always thinking of you, secret kisses when no one is looking, playful shared giggles, the widest smiles, never a doubt in mind, late night drives, you are his match made in heaven.

communication is your strongest asset in the relationship. the best parts of mark are his understanding and considerate nature. he gets you better than anyone you’ve ever known. he makes sure you’re seen, appreciated. you are everything he’s been searching for. you are the definition of an ideal partner. there’s never a question of your relationship, he makes sure you are loved. whether that be through grabbing you lunch out of his way. whether that be asking about your day. whether that be forehead kisses in the mornings. whether that be a long speech of why he loves you. he is the true meaning of good vibes. he didn’t have anything to dislike. loving him was the best and easiest decision of your life. he is the best you’ve ever had.

➳ LEE DONGHYUCK - ❝ love comes when you least expect it ❞

“wifey/hubby”, “my everything”, “soulmate”, the emotional 4am thoughts of self worth, a cathartic epiphany, a love that’s always been in front of you, light banter, snarky sly smirks, always holding you in some way, belting notes in the shower, late night serenades, cheek squishing, he’s a wish upon a star.

donghyuck has always been there for you and that is something unchanging. he’s bringing you dinner after long nights of studying. he’s showing at your door step when you need someone to comfort you. he is there for every lost cause of a relationship. the pick up the pieces and mend you back together. when you had given up on love, he never gave up on you. it took one fun drunk night and a lingering touch on your cheek for you to realize that his love for you had always been there. he wanted you more than any person in your life. all it took was him to realize that he was never going to leave you. he is the last person you would expect to be your’s. but you are the first person he wishes happiness for. he is a one true love. 

[hear-me-growl]

Ambrosia | Ksj | Chapter VI (final)

ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴏɴ Aᴏ3 || Dɪᴏɴʏsᴜs ·ᴘᴜʙ· ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀᴘᴏsᴛ || ↻ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

> ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: smut, humor, fluff, angst | s2l > ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: millionaire!Seokjin x bartender!, nyotaimori model!Reader > ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: mature [+18]; strong language and explicit sex > ᴡᴏʀᴅᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 5.9k

sᴇʀɪᴇs ɪɴᴅᴇx ||  ⟵ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴠ

💙 ᴀ/ɴ: can’t believe this beast is finally done (though I might post a bonus epilogue, we’ll see 😉). Thank you so, so much for reading and leaving likes. Not gonna lie, it’s been a hard one to write, but also extremely fun. As my first story in English (and also my first BTS fic), it holds a special place in my heart. Also I may or may not be a sucker for this Jin. Now that it’s over, don’t be shy to let me know your thoughts. It’s important for creators that you give feedback, even if just a few words or a keyboard smash. You can make someone (not only me) very happy.

Ambrosia brought a lot of people to my blog and I’m super thankful for you all and very excited to write many more stories you’ll enjoy too. Once again, thank you for all the love and support. 

Psst! Keep an eye out for the next update on the Dionysus ·pub· series. Did someone say Hobi?

“Thanks, you fuckers! We love you!”

The growl in the frontman’s voice raised screams and whistles that rumbled through Dionysus. Sweaty, ethereal and devilishly handsome, Taehyung bowed for the crowd chanting his band’s name. Everytime their signature purple bunny posters covered the beaten bricks of the pub, a mass of people flooded the establishment. V’s Moon Rabbits caused a frenzy wherever they played, waking the masses with their sound like a rockslide. The rock, jazzy melodies paired with the singer’s looks skyrocketed their popularity in underground Seoul.

However, no matter how many concerts and jam sessions were scheduled, they always came back to Dionysus —the pub that gave them a chance when nobody did.

After the performance, they usually hung out at the bar until they found a fan desperate for a chance to share the night with their idols. Doe eyes and sultry smiles in every corner, the boys never went home alone.

Tonight you didn’t work behind the bar, though. You just sat on a barstool, keeping your best friend entertained on her shift, ready to jump to her rescue if she felt overwhelmed. Not that she needed it, she handled the crowd with a big smile on her face. Beer in hand, you chatted animatedly with the blonde singer and Namjoon, the drummer, since the others had already found someone to drag to the bathrooms for an intimate rendezvous.

“You broke your drumstick. Again. You owe me 30.000.”

“I distinctly remember you mentioning both of them, so I’m not paying a single won.”

“C’mon, man. Don’t be a pussy,” Taehyung nudged his bandmate’s side as he took a sip of his beer. “Next time don’t make it so easy for her to win.”

“Yeah, pay up, Joon,” you chimed, a taunting tone lingering on your lips.

“Sorry, love. The rules were clear.” 

The tall man leaned back on the bar and gave his signature jaw-dropping smile, flanked by two cute dimples. Who would’ve thought underneath all that there was the lady-killer of the century? You bent forward towards him, sniffing before wrinkling your nose.

“Does it smell like chicken over here?”

A snort came from your other side, Taehyung trying to conceal his laughter and you snickered along. Namjoon’s tattooed hands ran over his chin as he watched the both of you in amusement too before speaking.

“Tell you what it doesn’t smell like: money in your pocket. Now, if you excuse me,” he said, eyes fixed on a juicy target. His self-satisfied smirk turned sultry as his gaze darkened, “there’s a pretty doll over there not sucking my cock and I’d like to change that.”  

In a flash, the drummer finished the rest of his drink, attention solely on the woman at the other side of the bar. Still perched on the counter, he looked at you with a raised brow. “Unless you want to join her?”

“Go get your dick wet already,” you nudged with a groan, fully aware that he wasn’t entirely joking.

Like a panther, he stalked towards his newfound prey, mixing with the crowd. Taehyung and you chatted for a little while. He differed from his charismatic persona on stage. V’s goal was to attract people with mysterious looks and alluring smiles, but Taehyung was much more reserved, rude even, except around his close ones. At some point, you noticed the cute girl behind him. You recognised her immediately and smiled warmly, inviting her to talk to the singer.

“Hi, Tae,” she greeted quietly.

Hearing his name, he turned around to face his number one fan. Her face brightened up with the attention.

“Hey, baby girl. Just arrived?”

“Err— yeah, I’m sorry I missed the show.”

“You’ve been to all of them for the past two years, I think you can skip one, ” he sneered. After that an awkward silence settled between the two. When he started to turn back to you, ending the conversation, she was quick to keep his attention.

“Do you… umm… wanna dance with me?”

“Not now, I’m talking.”

“Oh, of course! I’m sorry I interrupted,” she apologized, looking at you with doe eyes.

“No worries, sweetie,” you intervened as you shot a murderous glare to the man, the second-hand embarrassment urging you to help the poor girl out. “Stay and chat with us. What do you drink?”

Her eyes jumped from you to Taehyung nervously, a flash of pain through them when he lazily checked his phone, clearly indiferent. She swallowed a sigh, shrinking in defeat.

“Thanks for the offer, but I think I’m going to… my friend should be here somewhere,” she grimaced at her own excuse, but bit her lips and cocked her head before speaking again. “See you later, Tae?”

“I don’t know my plans yet, baby girl.”

“Right,” she whispered, looking at his side like he’d shot just her. After a beat, she cleared her throat, eyes on the floor. “Bye, then.”

She walked away, hand on her face to hide from the overflowing crowd and ponytail shaking. The singer took a sip from his beer, still on the phone. He didn’t even bother to look her in the eye to reject her.

“One: that was actually painful to experience, and two: you are a major asshole. That poor girl follows you like a puppy with heart eyes and you know it. Do you have to be so rude?”

“Hey, she knows what she’s getting into,” he answered with a shrug.

That naive fool. What a terrible mistake she made falling for Taehyung. To him there was no point in lying, so he proudly waved the “I’ll never be your boyfriend ” flag before anything happened and then jumped to the next roll in the hay without sparing a glance. Never settling, never making false promises. He was upfront about his intentions, so it never bothered you before, despite how tactless he was. Tonight, however, you felt pity at the heartbroken look in her eyes. Love brought more pain than happiness, she’d learn sooner or later.

Suddenly, something bumped into the barstool and you stumbled forward. Taehyung catched you before you could hit your head on the counter. With a snarl on display, you turned and yelled at the culprit, who zigzagged towards the exit, probably to smoke or take a piss. You scoffed. He probably didn’t even hear you, given his unsteady walk. Just as the door opened, a tall, neatly dressed figure entered the bar, stepping aside just in time to dodge the tripping drunk. 

It took a second for you to register the tingle travelling across your skin like wildfire brought by the newcomer. You had felt it before, that twisted warm fuzzy feeling, a disease that spread and ruined people. All too familiar and foreign at the same time, like rewatching an old movie with new eyes. 

‘You felt something that night and you feel it still’. 

The words echoed in your memory, taking you a couple of weeks back. That night after the event was your last conversation with him and you thought you’d finally rid yourself of unnecessary trouble. Quite the opposite. You found yourself craving for something, no matter how much instant ramen you ate or how long you stayed at work to keep yourself busy. His silence was directly proportional to your uneasiness, but you refused to connect the dots.

Until tonight.

Faster than light, your head snapped back at the singer to avoid being seen. Reason overlapped panic as you assessed the damage. That mind-reading snake was right, you felt something beyond physical for him. At least now, fully aware of the issue, you could fix it. Keeping a cool head, you devised a plan of action. It was imperative to eliminate those thoughts before they infected your brain any further, to show both him and yourself that your interest was merely a passing malaise, like a cold or an indigestion. You just needed to find the right medicine for it.

“You okay there? You look like you either had an epiphany or smoked the worst weed in Seoul.”

Taehyung’s voice was low in your ear and you realised the lack of distance between the two. Feeling him chuckle, you looked up at him. You’d forgotten he was even there, hands still low on your waist. In a feeble attempt to regain some control over yourself, you grabbed the shirt over his taut stomach and swallowed hard. Half-lidded, he tongued the corner of his mouth revealing a smug smile. No wonder people lost their shit about him. He looked bewitching and fun, but most importantly, uncomplicated. The perfect remedy for your stupid, stupid heart.

“Kiss me,” you blurted, eyes locked on the mark at the edge of his lower lip.

“What?”

A quick glance back at the door and you frowned before closing the distance to press your mouth roughly on his. For a second, he seemed confused, but then responded eagerly to the kiss. When you pulled back, panting and determined, he tongued the corner of his mouth in amusement.

“Not complaining, but where did all that ‘I don’t make out with my buddies’ philosophy go?”

“As far as buddies go, you’re the shittiest one I have. Not much of a loss there,” you joked, shifting your weight impatiently. Now of all times, Tae had to grow friendship ethics. Although you should’ve praised his character development, right now was a rather inconvenient moment to be a gentleman. What you needed was a distraction in the form of an unapologetic fuckboy. Fast.

Luck on your side, Taehyung just grinned cheekily, happy to indulge your sudden neediness, and tipped his head towards the crowd. He let you guide him through Dionysus, to a dark spot where you’d fuse with the stench of sweat and bad ideas.

“Gimme a minute, ok? Don’t move!” Shortie greeted with a warm smile, waving above intoxicated laughs and the strings of an old song’s bass. 

Seokjin nodded and leaned on the counter, avoiding the alcohol spilt all over it. Dionysus was especially crowded that night, which only made scanning the multitude in hopes to find you harder. 

After your last conversation, he gave you some space, a chance to miss him. On paper, it was a good strategy. What he didn’t expect was his plan backfiring. After a couple of weeks of self-restraint, his will power ran out. He missed you. Instead of working on his next project as he should’ve, his car brought him across Seoul to you —his personal bittersweet pill. He couldn't help but smile, even when the air reeked of sweat and the sticky floor threatened to peel off the red of his soles. What wouldn’t one of those sensationalists that defamed him give to publicly gut him for his new-found addiction. Those ever-changing eyes that begged him to keep trying despite your constant rejection made quitting you impossible. Only if you would see it too.

“Now, I’m all yours. Sorry to make you wait,” said the petite bartender, already pouring his usual drink. “I’m happy to see you, it’s been a while.”

“Work has been busy lately. No help tonight?”

 “If you mean it in a ‘ is my hot-ass crush here? ’ kind of way, she is,” your friend said, catching his intentions easily. Not that he put any effort in masking them, constantly looking around the place for you. “I don’t know where she went, though. She was sitting over there just a moment a— what the...?”

Seokjin followed her gaze, fixed intently somewhere behind him. Your body pressed against someone’s, fingers buried in blonde hair. Unable to look away, he watched a mouth clash against yours before traveling down your neck.

“Oh, Jin, I’m sorry. This dumbhead, I don’t know what’s gotten into her. Taehyung? Really? He’s like her little brother.”

I’m pretty sure “little brothers” don’t stick their tongues down your throat . Shortie kept talking in the background, probably making excuses for you. To his surprise, the first thing he felt wasn’t anger or jealousy, but something close to satisfaction. An odd sense of pride filled his chest every time the blonde touched you where he had before, when he kissed over the skin he had marked as his already. 

The man turned the two of you around, giving Seokjin a perfect view of your backside. Long fingers travelled down your spine, cupping your delicious ass with a rough squeeze. The same ass he remembered perking back for more despite the leftover sting his palm left behind. He couldn’t shake the vibrant shade of red he created that night, nor the soft whines you sang for him. Pretty eyes clouded with lust as you came on top of him, now etched in his memory forever —along with the iciness you left behind on his sheets the morning after.

With a fist full of his leather jacket, you laughed. Seokjin could tell it didn’t quite reach your eyes. In fact, it seemed like the attention on the man in front of you was only half-hearted. 

Yes, he noticed the pink tint on your cheeks, the hips grinding on a thigh clad in ripped jeans and shortened breaths. But he was also aware of your eyes bouncing around the pub distractedly as your companion nipped your jaw. A smirk tugged on Seokjin’s lips. He’d seen withdrawal before, when his mother quit smoking. Gum could not replace a cigarette and a toyboy could not replace him.

Meanwhile, you kept trying to redirect your wandering thoughts to Taehyung, who locked lips once again, sucking on your lower one. Closing your eyes, you attempted to concentrate solely on his tongue on your mouth. The air was humid, too many bodies in one room. It stuck to your skin the same way it did at the club with Seokjin, but somehow thicker. Tae smelled rich and exotic, nothing like the subtle sweetness of his surely expensive cologne. You remember because it lingered on your skin the morning after, along with the marks he imprinted all over your body. You weren’t as excited for Taehyung to leave his.

Catching your train of thought, you emptied your mind and only allowed pleasure to invade it. You left out a sigh at the hot pressure running through your veins as his thigh flexed against your core just right. It was all you needed at that moment, a nice body against yours to fight the infection of Kim Seokjin. Large hands roamed your body, brushing your breasts on their way up to your hair and tangled there to deepen the kiss. Just when you had achieved the perfect balance between numbing everything around you and enjoying the feeling, the blonde whispered hotly in your ear. His low grumble shook you out of your blissed state, crumbling any prospect of eluding reality.

All of the sudden you found the spicy kisses bland. A light frown etched between your eyebrows when you studied his profile. It dawned on you that it was Taehyung who just told you to come all over his jeans. Taehyung. The same guy who sent you stupid memes while taking a shit because “he was bored”. Fuck, you even came close to orgasming in front of him. Because of him. You winced at the thought. What a genius idea, 15-minutes-ago you. Way to go.

About to detangle from his hold to apologise for the impromptu makeout session —a damn good one, true, but probably scarring for life— he beat you to it. Hands still around you, he arched an eyebrow over your shoulder. 

“Hey, man. Want something?” he rasped out.

“The lady and I need to talk.”

Great . Just fucking peachy. You took a steady breath before turning around, putting a bit of space between you and your friend. The first thing you noticed was Seokjin’s piercing gaze, squinting slightly from how intently he looked at you. 

“Do we now?” you questioned acidly, wearing your best unfazed visage.

Seokjin looked damn fine tonight. Hands casually in his pockets and the gleam of his silver watch just showing. In that position his shoulders squared further. The urge to bite along the curves leading up to his neck rose out of nowhere. You really needed a cold shower.

He smirked at your response, as if he knew your deepest, dirtiest secrets.

“Yes, we do,” a command more than anything else. Still, you recognised the glint of playfulness in the black coffee of his eyes. The one you foolishly claimed for yourself, even though he probably used it on other girls. “Leave the puppy behind and let’s go outside. It’s too loud in here.”

“Who the hell is this jerk again?” Tae enquired dryly, offended by the nickname. He placed a hand on your hip, squeezing slightly to regain your attention.

You jumped slightly at the contact. Seokjin’s eyes snapped up, acknowledging his presence behind you, still too close. The sharp edge of his jaw rolled in annoyance, almost imperceptibly, but he was quick to smooth it with light-hearted indifference.

“The only reason she’s making out with you, kid.”

Amidst the deafening ambiance, you heard a pin drop. There was a beat of silence, tension so high it took you both a moment to register. Then, Taehyung stepped forward, moving you aside. He was not a fighter, despite what one may think with that foul mouth and attitude of his, but he had no problem in punching a douchebag.

“The fuck did you say?”

“Tae,” you stopped, catching his arm. Seokjin remained unaffected, holding the younger’s glare with neutral expression. “Please, don’t. Just go, I’ll deal with the asshole.”

Brows still furrowed, he studied you for a moment with scepticism. “You sure?” 

“Yeah, look I—” You pulled him closer, so you could talk to him more privately. No need for Seokjin to hear anything that could be used against you later. “I’m sorry. About all of this, I mean. I shouldn’t have kissed you tonight when there’s other, um, stuff on my mind. I needed something to help me unwind and you were here so... ”

“Five more minutes and you might’ve ‘unwound’ all the way.”

Your face burned immediately, aware of his lingering taste and the stickiness between your thighs. Pure joy bloomed on his lips at your reaction.

“Back to the whole friend thing?”

“Sure,” he shrugged, “but you owe me a beer for the semi.” 

With that, he nodded at Seokjin in some sort of solemn bro code and the older reciprocated. Men’s short grudge-holding span was always fascinating to witness. He waved both of you goodbye, as if the awkward situation had never happened. Trust Taehyung not to really give a fuck. He was the best at it.

You eyed Seokjin up and down and snaked through the crowd towards the back exit without a word. He followed closely the trail you opened, people too distracted to care if their drinks spilled when you shoulder them. Not sure if you felt angry, relieved, mortified, confused,  scared shitless or all of the above, you avoided looking back to check if Seokjin was still there. How did a fun night out with your friends end up like this? You were at home and ready to order a nutritionist’s worst nightmare. You coming to Dio, right? The boys perform tonight. Pretty pleeeease?🥺 That cursed text was to blame. Whoever invented best friends should be sued.

The difference in temperature made you shiver when you stepped out of the pub. A single bulb illuminated the alley, rain puddles and broken glass reflecting its dim light. The night was calm. Not a single siren wailed, like they usually did. Only the constant boom of the bass drum could be heard now, noise muffled underwater, as the door closed behind Seokjin. Your own pulse followed the rhythm, feeling the vibrations deep in your chest.

“Why are you here?” you finally asked. “Just to ruin my night or did you make a sport of being a jerk?”

“Doing you a favour. It didn’t look like you were having a good time,” he answered, amused. You could almost see the ‘I know when you are’ itching to follow. 

“That’s not for you to decide. Go home.”

“Not without you.”

His wolfish smirk stretched as he threw a wink. A bit late to try to lift the mood, in your opinion. He seemed to forget that the world didn’t revolve around his stupid, handsome face. It happened at the nyotaimori event, and it happened tonight. Even if you would’ve ended up alone anyway, he had no right to come all the way to Dionysus to mess with your head and ruin your plans —said plans being to drink the embarrassment of almost fucking Taehyung away. Still, he shouldn’t have interfered. You shouldn’t have tried to relax your emotional cramp with Tae either, but it was his mistakes you wanted to focus on, not yours.

“I missed that frown of yours, sushi girl.”

Unaware that you’d been scowling, your arms crossed in self-defense.

“Listen, you can’t just barge in on my life every time you’re bored,” you chided. “Get a hobby, plant a tree or whatever. Didn’t you like fishing? Go do that. Just don’t bother me.”

His features softened slightly. “You remember.”

How could you forget the half an hour rant at the burger joint? Truth be told, you did disconnect half-way, but you recall his somewhat boyish excitement as he gave you a whole monograph on baits. Also the fish puns, those you recall with painful accuracy.

“Just because you are full of yourself enough to have your ears clogged doesn't mean that mine are.”

He shook his head and laughed at your comment. When he stood in front of you to brush a stray strand out of your face, you froze for a second. The tenderness of the gesture was suffocating, his gaze on yours too. No matter how hard you tried to keep distance, Seokjin always found a way to close it. You wanted to run.

His eyes fell on your lips for a moment, intense and wanting. Suddenly that sliver of fondness evaporated from them as something else caught his attention. A hand slid down to your neck and his thumb wiped there repeatedly as if he wanted to clean the spot. Once again, his jaw tensed and his stare grew jet black. Swallowing hard, you felt your cheeks reddening both at his touch and the admonishing tut he gave. He was glaring at what you assumed was a hickey left there by Taehyung. Irrefutable proof of your useless attempt to escape the itch that was Seokjin. Because he was exactly that —a maddening, unreachable itch that one cannot assuage. 

“Don’t you think it’s cruel to toy with that Kurt Cobain wannabe?” The tone remained teasing, but his hard, steel stare gave away his mood. He’d never felt jealousy before, and it tasted dry and sour. “He might get the idea that you’re interested.”

You held his gaze, puffing with cockiness to disguise any sign of guilt. “I wouldn’t worry about him, he gets what casual means. Ask him for pointers on that.”

“You think I don’t?” he chuckled airly, brow raising. “I’ve had plenty of that, believe me. But this? Us ? Nothing casual about it, sweet cheeks. I told you already: I like you. I can’t stop thinking about you.”

Perfect teeth on display, he smiled at you. Selfish bastard, airing those words so carelessly. He gave the impression of a teacher explaining the slowest student how to do simple math, not a man admitting his feelings. Yet, the confession sounded brutally sweet in the quiet back alley. Perhaps the beer still buzzing was to blame or the opiate smell of his cologne coating your senses, but you wondered if it would be that bad to believe him. Then reality poured on you like tar. Even if he did feel like he said, it wasn’t worth the risk. He’d grow tired eventually and leave, like everyone else. He’d ask why couldn’t you be sweet and shy like his exes. He’d tell you that he would never introduce someone like you to his parents. He’d text saying that he would come home late after work, night after night. He’d call you a slut because ‘don’t lie to me, I saw you flirting’ with someone’s panties in his back pocket still. Every time you were naive enough to catch feelings, you’d paid for your stupidity tenfold and ended up hurt and broken. You wouldn’t go through it all again.

“There’s no us ,” you reminded both him and you.

“We should change that, then,” he offered with a shrug. “I want us.”

The fucker knew how to play the strings of your heart, a master puppeteer with the cruelest intentions. Every word was a shiver of excitement that pooled in your uneasy stomach. It felt a lot like love and it was terrifying. Love always faded into ugly crying, ice-cream and vodka. Cornered against your own crumbling walls, you transformed your mixed feelings into bitterness.

“I don’t know what kind of spoiled-prince fantasy you live in, but in the real world people don’t always get what they want. Shocking, I know. Get a whisky to swallow that crazy fact and leave me alone.”

You shoved him away and walked back towards the door, desperate for Seokjin-less air. The pressure in your lungs was suffocating. 

“Don’t run away, let’s talk about this.”

“There’s nothing left to say, rich boy. I told you I don’t play couples anymore.” Seokjin snorted, surely about to make a quick retort, but you cut him. “Find someone else for your little rom-com attempt. Now, if you’ll excuse me I’m going back in to find a man who can fuck me and not catch feelings after the first kiss like a Disney princess.”

“I’m not sure if your goal is to hurt me or make me lose interest, sweet cheeks, but it’s not working,” he stated, low grit in his tone. “Push me away all you want, I’m not letting my perfect woman slip through my fingers. Not when I know you feel the same way I do.”

You should’ve left and forgotten about him, but you took the bait.

“Oh, please, enlighten me. How’s that exactly?”

“Restless. Every fucking second of the day. Wondering if I’d laugh at the joke I just told or if I’d enjoy the new restaurant you’re at. Tired and grumpy, because you want me lying next to you so bad that you can’t sleep at night. Frustrated, because the moment we kissed, I ruined everyone else for you.”

You snorted, amused both at the accuracy of his words and how much they irritated you. Hopefully he’d assume you were mocking him. It had to be some sort of superpower, there was no other way he could read you so effortlessly. With every layer of sarcasm he peeled you felt more naked, more vulnerable to his sharp sweet nothings. Falling for him felt inevitable and you were afraid of crash-landing.

“Maybe you didn’t see me making out with a guy literally 5 minutes ago.”

“Oh, I did, sweet cheeks,” he said slowly, taking a step towards you. His lips curled upwards and you swallowed hard at the sight. He was hypnotic, expensive clothes fitting like a second skin. What an awful moment for your legs to become butter. “I saw his sloppy tongue on your mouth and you not smiling at him like you do with me. I saw how you kissed him just to take me out of your head.”

Your retreat ended quickly when your back bumped into the door you had been so determined to walk through. Emergency exit now blocked, the only strategy left was to hold your ground. And you would’ve, but the beating of your heart drowned any coherent thought. He stopped when the tips of his shoes kissed yours. Lifting your chin up, you tried to swallow the sand in your throat to no avail. Seokjin propped his hands on each side of your head, the slow tempo of his movements almost theatrical. Spikes of anticipation raised all over your skin. As he caged you, his eyes leveled with yours. You saw a glimmer of triumph in them, lips stretched in a self-satisfied grin. Maybe you could bite it off, kiss him hard enough to erase it.

“Careful, your ego is showing.” 

“Your bluff too,” he countered.

The poorly lit alley stayed silent for hours in the little bubble your words created. Stray raindrops that slid from the rooftops hit the ground uncomfortably loud. Perhaps it was just your percepcion. Seokjin held your glare with blazing determination. It was useless, you couldn’t convince him to leave. Around him you felt made out of glass, he saw through every lie and every rejection. You were love-sick and you both knew. There was no miracle remedy, no snake oil to cure this heart infection —it spread too deep already. The further away you tried to stay out of love, the deeper you got in it. The poetic irony might just as well slap an ‘I was here’ sticker on your forehead. 

With a heavy sigh you accepted defeat. 

“What do you want from me, Jin?”

Your whisper came out as a plea. Arms went limp on your sides, exhausted. ‘ Please, be gentle ,’ you wanted to say. Even if the words never came out, Seokjin understood. Your features stiffened as you braced yourself for the blow, ready to take the hit. You looked too fragile, too beaten. He hated it. Seokjin felt the need to hold you and make all the promises he intended to keep. He’d be there to lull you to sleep if you cried, to share your smiles, to lift you when you fell, to say ‘sorry’ every time he’d fuck up and ‘it’s ok’ when you did. A four-letter word burned his throat like alcohol, but he wouldn’t voice it —he didn’t want to scare you away.

“Right now? I want to kiss you. I want to take you home and take my time eating you out to get whatever doubt you might have about me, about us, out of your system. I want to make you come while you scream my name and forget that stupid idiot and any other idiot before him. I want to fuck you slow to make you understand how much you want me and then hard to show you how much I need you.” He inched even closer, trapping your eyes with his so you could read his heart in them. “I want to find you beside me in the morning and make a routine out of it. I want you to laugh at my naked butt in an apron while I make breakfast and fuck you again and again in the kitchen until you to beg me to never let go.” 

He paused, lifting a hand to cup your cheek. His eyes fleeted down as his lips ghosted yours, tickling the skin with his breath, and then back up for his next words. 

“I want everything with you.”

You were desperate to close the distance in a kiss, drown in his words. Techno beat pounded in your chest so loud that you thought something might explode. Everything . You wanted that too.

“Jin, I…” as you talked, your lips graced his. He looked at you intently, pupils completely blown and a choked gasp escaped him at the brief contact. The hand on your face tensed, showing you his neediness. It only spurred yours. “I’ve tried this before and it never turns out well.” 

“Not with me, sweet cheeks.” 

“I’m scared. What if—?” 

“Don’t be,” he cut with a smile and a wink. “You’re stuck with me. I promise.”

Tired of fighting a lost battle, you gave in. Your body moved on its own and you closed the barely-existing space between you, sealing your mouth and his with a kiss. There was urgency in his response, as his tongue immediately asked for permission. He kissed you with a starved need that you were quickly to match. His kisses were ardent, numbing you from anything outside Seokjin. Every doubt and heartbreak died where he started. Eager to taste you, he bit your lips until they puffed. Although neither of you couldn’t get enough of it, there was something gentle in your passion. His arms encased you and brought you close enough to fuse with him. Muscle memory laced your fingers to his dark hair, disheveling its perfect shape into whatever you wanted, and your hips grounded his. You molded together in a frenzy of desire. It was satisfying to see every limb and kiss back in place, exactly where they were meant to be. Like one of those compilation videos, it was addicting. The only thing missing was his bare skin on yours to make the moment perfect.

As you got lost in him, his words filled your head, triggering a moan that Seokjin drank with devotion. Perhaps it was foolish, but you let yourself believe him. No flowers, no romantic music in the background, just sincerity in his eyes as he said them. He didn’t paint a movie-like romance where every day would be perfect. He didn’t swear a life of never-ending happiness or vowed to never hurt you. No, he made one promise: that he’d be there. The effortless conviction in that one promise told you that he’d stay and try, that he’d fight for you. He was stubborn and persistent enough for you to trust him. Besides, he always kept his promises before. 

Now that you allowed what you felt for him to flow freely, you couldn’t cointan it. He flipped your world upside down. You wanted to tell him what an irritating, fun, conceited, irresistible prick he was, that sometimes you would choke him and others you would kiss him until your lips drew blood, that with him you felt the barest you’ve ever been, but also the safest. Words weren’t enough to express all that, so you kissed him fervently and urged him closer, your heartbeat reverberating in his chest, to show him instead. He grunted, immersed in you and those words you didn’t speak. No need for it, he heard them in the way you moaned and pressed against his hardened cock, seeking desperately some kind of friction. Your hands roamed his shoulders, crinkling the material of his shirt. He felt so yearned for that he forgot to breathe. When his lungs couldn’t take it anymore, Seokjin broke the kiss, missing it the moment cold air hit his wet lips. You whined at the loss, but allowed yourself a moment to recover. Panting heavily, you both stared at each other. At that moment, he looked perfect. Dishevelled and void of that cold mask he wore most of the time, it was the final shot you could take —you were recklessly and catastrophically in love, with no hope of recovery. All that fight you put up, just to lose anyway. What a poor soldier you’d make. With a breathy laugh you rested your forehead on his chin, which brought a bright smile. Still trying to get some air, he kissed your hairline tenderly as he brushed back flyaway strands. Your fingers mimicked the intimate gesture, drawing circles on the nape of his long neck.

“By the way, I don’t beg,” you quipped suddenly, lifting your head so he could see the arch on your brow and a half bitten smirk. The moment was getting too soppy already.

“You look like you enjoy new experiences.”

A wink and a kiss and then you were in his arms again, hidden in your newfound shelter as it started to drizzle in the back alley of Dionysus.

ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛ: @aretha170

ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʀᴇᴘᴏsᴛ, ᴇᴅɪᴛ ᴏʀ ᴛʀᴀɴsʟᴀᴛᴇ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋ © hear-me-growl, October 2020 

[monaownsmyass]

It’s Complicated/Uncomplicated - Part 1/2

Requested fic by @ineedskyecrandall (if you have any fic ideas or requests you’d like me to write, you can leave me an ask!)

Book: My Two First Loves, (after) Chapter 38

Pairing: Ava Lawrence x MC (Emma Price)

Genre: Fluff

Rating: G, none

Word count: 1,896

A/N: This takes place after Ava dropped MC off at her house after homecoming. Later, Ava asks MC out on a date. It’s technically a continuation of my previous Ava x MC fic (read here) but you don’t have to read it, all you have to know is that they share a kiss. Also, this wasn’t meant to be a two-parter but as I was writing I noticed how long it was gonna be lol so I split it up.

Tag list: @ineedskyecrandall @kamilahsayeet2063 @avalawrencefl @lovekamilahsayeed (lmk if anyone would like to be included or removed in my next fics.)

Part 2 here!

I watched as Ava's car drove away, sighing with a stupid grin on my face. God, I felt like I've been waiting for eternity for that to happen without even realising it. I quickly went to the bathroom to get changed and plopped myself onto the bed, sprawled out, that damn grin never leaving my face.

I stared at my bedroom ceiling, the fairy lights I had hung around my bedroom providing the only source of lustre. The soft glow dancing against my skin in a way that made me feel as if I were in another world. After that kiss, I'm pretty sure I was.

That kiss, it was all I was thinking about. How have I gone so long without kissing Ava? It felt as if I've always been craving to know the way her lips felt on mine. That made me think, have I always wanted this from her? Or was it a whim of the moment? So caught up in each other that kissing her was the only way I could express that intense feeling between us?

I thought back to all the times I've spent with Ava. I thought about how I accidentally tripped over myself while walking to class and Ava laughing at my clumsiness. Instead of scolding her, I was transfixed by the sound of her laugh, bright and dazzling. And that time she was comforting me as I cried into her shoulder, holding me and rubbing my back, reassuring me everything was going to be alright. I felt so safe and warm in her embrace.

Then there was that other time when we were at the beach together. I pushed her into the water and ran to shore as fast as possible while laughing. I remember my giggling stopped dead in it's track when I saw her resurfacing from the water, walking towards me like an avenging goddess. I felt nervous but at that time I thought it was because I was scared she was going to get her revenge on me. She did, by the way. Being much stronger than me, she dragged me towards the ocean and ultimately ended up lifting me and tossing me into the water.

I also thought back to the first time we had a sleepover. Both of us awkwardly trying to fit together on my single bed at that time. I've upgraded to a queen size since then because Ava started sleeping over a lot more frequently after that but at that time, we had to squeeze onto my bed that was definitely not made for two. I remember feeling anxious but excited and thinking it was because I've never been this close to anyone before, physically and emotionally.

Right before the kiss, I had recollections, moments with Ava flashing before me, passing by too quickly to process but long enough to know what I felt. However, looking deeper into them right now, I realised that that kiss wasn't because it felt right in that instance. It wasn't because we were caught up in the moment. No, it was because I have liked Ava for a while now.

My eyes widen in comprehension at my epiphany. I knew I liked her after kissing her but looking back now, it hit me that I've liked her for a long time, I just couldn't tell if it was just purely platonic or also romantic.

I’ve always liked Ava Lawrence, my best friend.

Just the thought alone made shivers run through my body. It all finally made sense now, all those unexplainable feelings I would just brush off as close friendship. I've never had a friend like her before. I mean sure, Mason and I had been friends since we were kids but I've never had this kind of connection with him or with anyone else. Except for Ava. So I'd just assume that's what inseparable friendships were like, but maybe not.

Okay, definitely not.

Still staring at my ceiling, I bit my lip as memories ran through my mind. The more I thought about it, the more I began to wonder how on earth I've never figured out sooner that I liked women in general. Subconsciously, my hand slapped down against my face at my oblivion.

"Ow!"

I probably shouldn't have done that.

I won't deny that Ava was the main girl that I always thought about but there were times where I would see a pretty girl and catch myself getting flustered or blushing or even acting shy. Well, I guess I know why now.

I rolled onto my side and looked at my phone. Noah and Mason had been blowing up my phone and I didn't even notice. I just continued to stare at the screen lighting up when a message would come in. I didn't feel like talking to either of them right now but that didn't stop my mind from spiraling once again.

Noah and Mason. My first two loves. I definitely had feelings for them, heck, I definitely loved both of them. But was I in love with either them? I cared for them both and I definitely found them incredibly attractive. But then there's also Ava, the girl that was always on my mind. Wow, this crap was confusing. But one thing wasn't, not anymore.

"I'm... bi?" I whispered into the dimly lit room.

As soon as I spoke it, it was like a flip switched in my brain. It felt right. This was who I am, this is me. I'm bisexual and it felt.. great. That dumb smile that I had as I watched Ava drive away found it's way back onto my face. Relief washed over me, incredibly comforted by the idea that I figured one part of the puzzle that was my life.

My phone lit up and buzzed again, the different ringtone catching my attention. It was Ava's personal ringtone. During our first sleepover, she insisted that we set special ringtones for ourselves on each other's phone. Reason being that even if we were near our phones but weren't on it, we could tell that the other was thinking of us, wanting to talk to us. The idea back then made me blush and it still worked it's wonders now. Years later, we still haven't changed it.

I immediately grabbed my phone off the nightstand and opened the message.

‘Hey, nerd, you still up?’ the message read.

Seeing the term of endearment made me let out an involuntary grin. I knew she meant it lovingly because I do the same to her.

‘Yeah, I was just thinking,’ I replied.

‘About?’

I paused. Should I admit that I was thinking about her? Screw it!

‘You.’

I saw her typing a reply and then stopping. I began worrying if I shouldn't have been so upfront before a message popped up.

‘I was thinking about you too. About that kiss.’

My heart leapt from my chest, the smile on my face grew wider as I read the message over and over again.

‘I miss you,’ I wrote back.

‘I just saw you, loser.’ I could almost hear and see her giggling at my text. The image caused butterflies to dance in my tummy. ‘But yeah, I miss you too...’

‘I wish you were here,’ I responded and I didn't realise how true that was until I typed it out. It suddenly felt much colder in my room, much too big despite having the smallest room in the house.

‘Me too,’ her text read back. I rested my phone against my chest and let out a deep exhale. I just wanted to hold onto her again like I did after our kiss. The idea made my heartbeat increase rapidly.

I lifted my phone and saw her typing again. ‘Not to ruin the mood or whatever, but I have to know, what do Mason and Noah mean to you? What do I mean to you?’

Funny how my heart went from pumping like crazy to almost stopping entirely. In fact, it sank down to my stomach. How was I gonna answer her when I didn't even know myself?

‘Ava... I care about them but I care about you too, and you know that. And I definitely see you as more than my best friend if that’s what you want to hear.’

‘More like what? Sisters?’

I scrunched up my nose. ‘Eww, that's so gross! I don't kiss my sister on the lips!’

Once again, I could hear her unadulterated laugh, a laugh that could brighten anyone's day. ‘Lol then be more specific.’

Of course she'd make me spell it out for her, she has always been so demanding and persistent. I admired that about her. ‘Fine, I see you as someone I could be with, romantically. As someone I could date. I can imagine us together in the long run. You by my side, as my other half. I can see you as my girlfriend.’ I hesitated before sending the next text. ‘But my feelings are complicated... ‘cuz I don't think you're the only one I feel that way about, and I don't know who's the right one for me.’

After I hit send, it occurred to me that maybe I shouldn't have done that, that I may have blown my chance at being with Ava. But then it hit me. I knew Ava wasn't gonna stop being my friend and I had two great guys as alternatives. So why did I care so much if she takes it the wrong way and stops pursuing me?

I saw the screen of my phone light up with another notification from Ava.

‘Let me help you uncomplicate your feelings then. Can I take you out tomorrow evening? On a date?’

A sense of relief washed over me, thrilled by the prospect that she still wanted me. I knew what she meant, but I just wanted to make sure. ‘We've been on many dates before.’

‘I know but I mean it this time. A proper date, not a friend date.’

My heart started beating so fast I was sure I was going to go into cardiac arrest.

‘I'd love that!’ I quickly shot back. I was elated that she didn't back down from wanting something more out of our friendship.

‘Oh, thank god.’

I giggled to myself, happy to be reassured that she was just as nervous as I felt.

‘I really want to hear your voice,’ I confessed.

‘Me too,’ she replied. ‘But it's getting pretty late, you should sleep.’

‘Ava :(’

‘Haha, sorry beautiful, but we have a big day planned ahead of us tomorrow so you should rest.’

‘You’ve already planned what we’re gonna do tomorrow?’

‘Let’s just say I’ve thought about it. Now go to bed.’

‘Alright, fine, good night I guess :(’ I typed back sulkily even though I was smiling so hard.

‘Sweet dreams, Emma<3.’

I send her back a heart in reply and finally put my phone down on the nightstand again. Once more, I found myself staring at the ceiling, wondering how the heck I was supposed to go to sleep now when my heart felt like a roller coaster and when butterflies were invading my tummy.

Eventually, after hours or tossing and turning, I finally drifted off the sleep with a small smile on my lips and Ava on my mind.

(More fics!)

[leahxx129]

His Name (demon!Dean Winchester x Reader)

This is a submission for the immensely talented @fvckingavengers​ ‘ quarantine writing challenge. Also, I’d like to credit @angelkurenai​ since her soulmate AU imagines provided the main idea for this fic. 

My prompt for inspiration was:

You’re all I need when I’m holding you tight / If you walk away I will suffer tonightI found a man I can trust / And boy, I believe in us / I am terrified to love for the first time / Can’t you see that I’m bound in chains? / I finally found my way / I am bound to you - Bound to You by Christina Aguilera

Summary: Nobody knew why or how, but on their thirteenth birthday every person on planet Earth would start feeling this burning sensation on their left lower arm, which intensifies as the day carries on. By the time the sun goes down, the burning sensation would leave a scar, forming a name. It’s believed to be the name of the person one belongs with. The letters on your skin spell out Dean Winchester.

Warnings: angst, mild swearing

Word count: 3.275-ish

Sam Winchester is staring intensely on the map in the War room as if he watched it closely enough, it would show where his brother went from the last place he’d been spotted at. Sam is tired beyond words – he has spent every waking hour searching for Dean, even though he is not sure that the demon curing ritual would work on a Knight of Hell.

„You know we’re gonna find him, right?” Cas speaks up, making Sam jump a little.

„Cas... didn’t see you there... Uhm, sure, I know. It’s just harder than I thought.” his words don’t really comply with his facial expression.

„Well, I do not know if this is helpful, but Crowley sent me a photo a few minutes ago with a text saying ’Show this to Moose’. It depicts a woman I have never seen before.” he hands Sam the phone.

„Oh my God!” Sam’s eyes light up with excitement. „Why haven’t I thought of that?!”

„Thought of what? I think I’m in the dark here, Sam.”

But Sam is too busy looking for something in his pockets to answer. A couple of seconds later a familiar rattle indicates he found his car keys and he claps Cas on the shoulder.

„We have a long drive ahead of us, buddy.”

It‘s 2. a.m. on a Thursday night, you are wiping the bar counter with a cloth. Nothing out of the ordinary happened all evening. You started your shift around 6 p.m. at the local bar, only the regulars came in. The air was heavy with the scent of liquor and cigarette smoke. Even the old jukebox in the corner and the clatter of billiard balls sounded pretty much the same as every night.

Just as you’ve finished wiping and start washing the glasses, the main door opens then closes slowly with a squeak.

„I’m sorry but were closed! Try tomorrow, pal.” you say without looking at the newly arrived guest. It’s not a rare phenomenon that someone wants to stick around for a couple more drinks after closing time, so you don’t suspect anything. Not until the person begins talking, anyway.

’Really? I thought you’d make an exception for an old friend...”

Hearing Sam Winchester’s voice makes your blood run cold, numbing you to an extent that the glass you are holding slips out of your grasp and shatters to a dozen pieces on the floor.

„Sam...” despite your best efforts you can’t muster anything other than his name.

„I mean, I was hoping you’d be excited to see me, Y/N, but breaking glasses is not necessary. Or safe.” he chuckles, sitting down on a bar stool.

„Shut up, smartass!” you intend to look serious, but a smile creeps on your face, nevertheless.

There’s a long moment of silence. Neither of you want to spoil the joy of reunion so you just look at one another, taking in how the other has changed over the years. You pour two scotches and finally Sam clears his throat.

„I see you’re still covering up his name.” he states, referring to your bracelets that hide most of your left lower arm.

Oh, right. His name. Frankly, you tend to forget about those words burnt in your skin quite easily.

Nobody knew why or how, but on their thirteenth birthday every person on planet Earth would start feeling this burning sensation on their left lower arm, which intensifies as the day carries on. By the time the sun goes down, the burning sensation would leave a scar, forming a name. It’s believed to be the name of the person one belongs with. The letters on your skin spell out Dean Winchester.

You can still picture the day you got it crystal clearly.

It was around 10 p.m. when it finished burning and you were able to read it. Your father’s face turned to an ashy color and he drove you to Bobby Singer’s house where the Winchesters were staying at the time. Hearing an engine die, Bobby and John came out to see who the unexpected visitors were.

“Stay in the car!” your father ordered through gritted teeth as he got out and you obeyed.

John smiled when he recognized him, but his smile soon turned to a painful grimace – courtesy of your father’s amazing left hook.

“What the hell, man?!” he shouted in disbelief, wiping the blood off his face with the back of his hand. Bobby was visibly indecisive whether to stop the fight or let it play out.

“I could ask you the very same question, Winchester!” your father bellowed in response.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about…”

“I’m talking about the name that formed on my little girl’s arm, John! You have some dark connections, you must’ve got something to do with it!”

“It’s Dean, isn’t it?” you could see the epiphany on his face even in the poor light that filtered through Bobby’s kitchen window. “Look, pal... you and I both know damn well that this cannot be controlled.”

A long silence ensued. Only the crickets could be heard.

“Ever since my girl’s name showed up on your boy’s arm, I prayed every single night for it to be a mistake. For her to get a different name when the time comes, and you know I don’t believe in God, John!” your father’s voice cracked. “I prayed for her to get the name of a lawyer, a doctor or a dentist… somebody that’ll provide for her. And she got a hunter. Out of seven billion people, she got a hunter… I don’t want her to end up like Mary, or her Mom.”

John took a step closer and squeezed your father’s shoulder.

“Dean will take good care of her, I promise.”

You banish the memory as quickly as you can. The only thing you’re thankful for is the fact that none of your dads lived long enough to see how much of a lie John’s promise would prove to be.

“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t cover it up.” you answer Sam coldly and he shoots you an apologetic look.

“What about yours? Have you found your, uhm... what’s her face… Eileen Leahy?” your pronunciation earns a genuine smile from him.

“No, not yet. I’m starting to think she’s a myth.”

“Well then, she’s the luckiest myth in this whole damn world, I can tell you that much.”

You down your drink in one gulp and decide to ask what’s been bothering you ever since he set foot in the bar.

“Alright, Sam, honest talk. Why are you here? What’s up? I gave you this address for emergencies and the fact that we’re having a face-to-face conversation right here, right now is a bad sign in my book.”

He looks like he’s contemplating the way to present the situation to you, but you’re having none of it.

“No need for sugarcoating, hot stuff, just spill it.”

“Dean’s a demon.”

You’re not sure if you’ve heard it right or the scotch you’ve just drunk was spiked.

“Excuse me?”

“Dean’s a demon. He died with the Mark of Cain on his arm and he turned into a Knight of Hell. Gone rogue. I want to fix him, but you know Dean... it’s damn hard to find him when he doesn’t wanna be found.” he flashes you a smile but when you don’t replicate it, he continues “I’m here because he’s here, Y/N. Based on my intel, he’s been visiting this bar to see you. Will you help me cure him?”

With a blank stare you pour yourself another drink, now wishing for it to be spiked.

The next day after closing you don’t get into your car immediately; you decide to light a cigarette first. Sam’s words are still echoing in your ears. A demon? And he’s been visiting the bar to see you? Why the hell would he do that? You’re about to stub the remainder of your cigarette when you hear his voice from behind you.

“I always thought you looked incredibly sexy when you smoked, darlin’. Turned me on so much.”

You spin around on your heels just to bump straight into Dean’s chest. He grabs hold of your arms to steady you. His touch gives you goosebumps, but you compose yourself swiftly. You cannot allow him to see the effect he still has on you, even after everything that happened.

“I know, Dean, you made it clear quite a few times with your actions… what I don’t know, however, is the reason behind your little visit... so, a fucking explanation would be nice. But first, let go of me!”

“That’s such an ugly word from such a pretty mouth… and to be honest, I think you know damn well what I’m doing here. A birdy tells me Sammy paid you a visit and I doubt that he didn’t share a few things about me, Y/N. As for letting you go… sorry, no can do.” he smirks.

“What do you mean ‘no can do’, Winchester?!” you ask sharply, panic rising withing you.

“Well, more precisely, I don’t want to. I’ve missed you.” he leans in closer to your face “And frankly, I don’t want you to put those engraved demon cuffs on me that peek from your back pocket, sweetie.” he whispers against your lips.

“Okay. How ‘bout the ones Sam is about to put on you?” you whisper back, causing him to furrow his brows in confusion and lean away. This gives you enough space to headbutt him and he automatically stumbles a step backwards, allowing Sam to cuff him from behind.

With united forces you manage to hustle Dean into the trunk of your car.

“You know, demon or not, it’s nice to know some things never change. You’ve always let your dick do the thinking instead of your brain.” you tell him condescendingly before closing the trunk.

When Dean wakes up in the Men of Letters’ dungeon restrained, at first, he’s perplexed. Then as realization slowly hits him, his face becomes distorted with fury and he starts wriggling in an attempt to break free, but he doesn’t succeed. A frustrated, unhuman-like growl leaves his throat. You watch this with undeniable pleasure.

„Mornin’, sunshine!” you greet him jovially.

There’s a short silence as he watches you prepare some syringes on the nearby iron table.

„So, you’re the one who’s gonna do it, huh? Or at least try...” he says arrogantly.

„Yup!”

„Now that’s funny ’cause you see I thought you hated needl-„ but you don’t let him complete his sentence as you pierce your skin faster than he could finish it. Your blood fills up the syringe in no time.

You walk over to him and sit on his lap in a straddling position.

„I do hate needles, Dean.” You admit „Kudos for remembering. But I’m pretty sure that you’ll hate what comes next even more than I hate them and that makes it worth it.”

Before he could react, you stab him in the neck with the syringe, completely emptying its content into his artery. The unhuman growl breaks out once again, but this time it turns into manic laughter.

„Wow, that was exciting!” he exclaims as his eyes turn black „Almost as exciting as Jo holding me at gunpoint when we first met. But just almost... You know, there were times I wished it was her name on my arm instead of yours.”

 „Interesting. Because there were times I wished it was your brother’s name on mine, but I guess we can’t always get what we want, now can we?” you shrug and walk back to the table, not minding Dean’s pitch-black stare. He thought he could hurt you since Jo was your best friend, but you manage to hit closer to home.

You sit down on a chair, place your legs on the table and put your headphones on.

„What are doing?” Dean asks, clearly upset.

„You didn’t seriously think I was gonna listen to your annoying blabber until the next shot, did you?” he opens his mouth to reply but you turn on the music on your phone and start lip-syncing to ’Dream on’ by Aerosmith.

In the following four hours you administer the next four shots, each at every clock turn. Dean says something insulting each time and you try to ignore him each time - with more or less success.

“Alright, hot stuff, time for the sixth shot!” examining your arm you realize it starts resembling to a needle pillow, but you draw another fix for him all the same.

This time he appears calmer. He’s not trying to pull his head away or even bite you like at some previous occasions. No shouting or growls either. You can see he started sweating, the small drops glisten on his skin like illuminated diamonds. Could the ritual actually be working?

You’re halfway back to the table when he calls you by the nickname he gave you, forcing you to turn back.

“I just want you to know I admire you. I really do, Y/N. Seeing you put this much effort into this makes me wish I put more in our relationship.” he shoots you a sad, crooked smile.

“Careful, Dean. If you don’t stop attempting to manipulate my emotions, I’m gonna punch you in the face. Again. But this time harder.” you warn him.

“I’m not toying with you. I honestly wish.”

“Well it’s kind of too late for that, isn’t it?” you take a step closer to him and pull up the bracelets on your arm. “See these words? They are the sole reason I’m here and doing this. Okay?”

“Who are you trying to fool, sweet thing? Me or yourself?”

“Shut up, asshole.”

Your hands tremble when you get back to the table and put the headphones on. You feared this moment would come and here it is. He’s trying to get under your skin. And it’s working.

Later on when you approach him with the seventh shot, he tilts his head to the side, offering his neck.

“Go on.” he encourages you and you take the opportunity. The ferocious, invincible being Sam chained down is nowhere to be seen – a broken man with beautiful green eyes looks longingly at you instead.

“There’s one more to go and you’ll be your annoying self again, hot stuff.” you tell him softly, relenting a little.

“And you?”

“I’ll be on my way to the farthest place from here.” you decide to tell him the truth, which seems to render him speechless for a minute.

“Why do you hate me so much, Y/N?” I mean, I know I’ve never been the high definition of an awesome boyfriend, trust me, but the amount of resentment I sense baffles me.” he asks, sounding genuinely intrigued.

The ball of uneasiness in your stomach grows two sizes in the span of a minute.

“You’ve lost your right to ask such personal questions four years ago, Winchester. You’ve lost it when you left that letter on the kitchen counter, and you walked out on us!” you say in a strained voice.

Suddenly, all the memories you‘ve worked so hard to suppress flood back in.

When Sam jumped in the pit, Dean was lost. His self-destructive behavior foreshadowed a gruesome end and you just couldn’t let him spiral down like that. You made arrangements and got out of the life. Rented a house in the countryside and started living like a normal couple. Beforehand, your relationship was stormy to say the least, but settling down steadied it a lot. Everything was picture perfect for about a year - then you found that damn letter when you arrived home from work. Dean explained in it that Sam was alive, and he needed some time to figure stuff out. You didn’t even get the chance to tell him what you learned that day… and this was the last straw. You never contacted Dean Winchester again, nor did you speak to him directly. Your liaison was Sam up until that night in the bar’s parking lot.

Dean’s voice brings you back to reality.

“My brother came back from the dead… I was confused, Y/N. Just like I wrote, I needed time! After a while I was trying to reach out to you, but you refused to even-“he stops mid-sentence “Wait a minute… walked out on you… as in… plural?”

You nod mechanically and his eyes widen.

“Wha-what happened?” he chokes out eventually.

“I was pregnant. Then miscarried. Don’t worry about it.”

Is that really a teardrop running down his cheek, or are you imagining things?

“Don’t worry about it?” he raises his voice in disbelief. “That’s all you’re gonna say about it?!”

“I don’t want to say anything else, Dean. Because if I pull on that thread again, my mind will go to a dark, lonely place and I think I deserve better than that.”

“Goddamnit…” he exhales loudly, then continues “When all of this is over, I want you to stay.”

“Beg your pardon?”

“I want you to stay with me. Here. I want a clean slate, a-a new beginning.”

You can’t comprehend what’s happening. One minute you were curing your ex-boyfriend from demonism, and the other he wants to start things over despite your history together. 

Instead of replying, you fill up the last syringe and administer the eighth shot quickly, then deliver the required incantation. Just as you finish, Sam enters the dungeon and you run past him straight to your car. You open the door but before you could sit in somebody closes it from behind. You don’t have to turn around to know who it is, but you do it anyway. Dean takes your left arm and reveals his own name.

“I remember the night you got this thing. I was in the house when you and your dad arrived at Bobby’s and I witnessed the whole ordeal. I know that ‘til now I did a crappy job keeping the promise my dad made to yours but give me one last chance to do it right, okay?”

You look away, trying to blink back a few tears that want to escape your eyes deperately.

“I don’t know, Dean…”

He gently grasps your chin to make you face him.

“You know, when Sam gave me your message saying you don’t need me anymore, I thought – fine. If you don’t need me, I don’t need you, simple as that. But it was a lie. I only realized how big when I became a Knight of Hell… I enjoyed killing, Y/N. I enjoyed killing so much that it scared the crap out of me. But all this darkness and anger brought on by the mark alleviated one night when I accidentally stopped at that bar and saw you…”

“Damn, Winchester, are we having a chick-flick moment here?” you ask, trying to take the edge off the situation while wiping your eyes.

“Yeah…I guess we are. But don’t tell anyone ‘cause it would ruin my reputation.” he whispers the last part.

You scoff loudly.

“What reputation are you talking about, exactly? I think you lost every bit of it back in the parking lot when I kicked your demon ass.”

“Oh, well, I guess you’re right, sweet thing.” he admits with a breathy laughter.

“As for a second chance… fine.  But fail to keep that promise once more and I’ll be gone for good. Understood?”

At first a look of genuine surprise spreads on his face but it soon gets switched up by gratitude. He places a feather light kiss on your lips as confirmation.

Truth be told, you could never leave him just as he could never leave you – at least not permanently. No matter the pain and the misery, you belong with each other. Your souls are bound by an invisible lace that nothing can tear apart.

[loyally-unfaithful]

—; but “sentimental boy” is my nom de plume

word count: 1916

pairing: connor/gn!reader

genre: slight fluff; hurt no comfort

summary: it has been a year after the android revolution. humans and android alike settled down, an olive branch was offered as a sign of reconciliation. with newfound peace came along newfound love, and many open roads to choose from. this was no different for the rk800—connor. surprisingly or unsurprisingly, he decided to continue working at the dpd, this time as a bonafide detective. but he has also accepted the thrilling uncertainty of life that deviancy has brought; the same strings that brought his lover in his life.the same ones he hated and cursed, the same fates who ripped it all away.

a/n: everytime i convince myself i came out of my dbh hyperfixation i just look at connor and i become lovesick again.

gosh i know i should be finishing my other fic or work on the prologue script for my vn, but,,,,,,, i just had a sudden hankering for connor angst,,,,

written during a sleep deprivation induced moment of epiphany,,,,, (purple prose cuz im extra af uwu)

I’ve never written angst before so i’d love to hear your thoughts on it

maybe if you asked him one year ago whether he’d consider returning someone’s feelings, romantic feelings, he’d reply to you with a placid smile and a polite « i’m sorry, i wasn’t programmed to reciprocate romantic interest. ». he remembered that he’d sneer at them internally. now thinking about it, long before he questioned his obedience towards her, he already showed signs of deviancy.

you did what you were designed to do.

memories from his past would still torment him erratically, doubts would resurface on particularly dark days. but you were the light that cut through that haze. this wasn’t a “fake deviancy”. it couldn’t have been. not when he is holding your body so close to his, warmth radiating off of each other, two heartbeats—similar, but different—thrumming together. all the softly whispered and adoringly announced « i love you »’s; all the quick and coveted pecks and all the feverish and passionate kisses. no, he was alive, he was sure of it—alive and absolutely enamoured by you. all semblance of doubt ebbed away when you entered his life.

whenever he’s around you, he feels more alive: you make him feel everything, all the little precious things. tenderness and adoration when he shares tranquil mornings with you. he feels more alive when he’s with you, all the little habits and routines too endearing: the sweet post-it notes scattered over your shared flat; scribbled upon it are encouraging words or sweet nothings. conflicting work schedules meant that moments spent together were scarce, but that made them even more valuable and coveted. captivation, was another emotion that he felt around you. your mannerism, your dreams and interests, your physical attributes and quality of voice. logically speaking, you were just another human, insignificant in the grand scheme of things. you’d live and then one day, you’d die. as if you never really existed. but he wasn’t being logical. how could he be? when you were right there in front of him? you made him irrational, and he found that new aspect in life thrilling. confusing at first, but exciting. he was eternally grateful that you let him experience all these beautiful emotions with you. he was grateful that you allowed him in your short journey that you called life.

he was happy, absolutely content, with his shared life with you. you were both in perfect places in your respective lives: you both had a stable job, loving family backing you up, and a fulfilling love life. what seemed to be a mismatched couple at first turned to be 2 pieces of the same puzzle finally finding their place. life for the both of you couldn’t be better.

but along with the many exquisite moment that your romantic endeavours brought you, the android didn’t only taste the sweet delicacies of life; no matter how idyllic a moment may be, there were times when he had to taste the astringent and sour desserts life offered.

anger. that was an emotion that he felt. but that’s not accurate, no… it was frustration and shock and betrayal, all the unsavoury feelings in the world. perhaps it was due to his inexperience, maybe his lack of exposure to these negative sentiments, that caused him to snap the way he did. to hurt you the way he did. but it happened and there was no turning back the clock.

no matter how much he begged and cried for it.

he was proud that you got the job offer in canada, he really was. and he, like any other caring boyfriend would, offered to accompany you there, an offer which you gladly accepted. that was the plan. but plans were difficult to follow. crime waits for no man, working for the law meant that connor must always be available for duty. no excuses, he was an android. but connor wasn’t just a simple android detective, no, he had a much more important role: he was the link, the messenger, between jericho and the police force. he was the crucial communication between the two forces. so when jericho contacted him about threats of anti-android attacks, he had to make an appearance at their base. the meeting coincided with the day you were meant to travel to canada. it was a simple trip really. it only took a few hours by train, stay in canada for 2 days (it was the weekend), and then return back to detroit, probably arriving in the late afternoons to their home.

but you were looking forwards to traveling with your wonderful partner after « [we] spent so much time apart ». the day he told you the urgent change of plans, connor was tired, overwhelmed. you were frustrated and expectant. a fight was bound to have erupted. accusatory statements, along the lines of: « you don’t actually care about me! it’s all about work and work and work! » and « i can’t believe how selfish you’re being right now! » in between shouting and yelling and frustration and anger and contempt–

you both went to bed exhausted but spiteful, still not forgiving each other. in hindsight, he felt so utterly pathetic, so unbelievably childish, for being that cruel, and uncaring. he didn’t want to be like him again. so many glares and insults were thrown at each other, tears threatened to spill, LED flashed and shone a true red, doors were slammed. he felt awful, plain and simple. you both lied in the same bed, under the same cover. so close yet so excruciatingly far apart. back facing the other’s, no one said a word.

you woke up before him. bitter and unhappy. no morning kisses, no whispered « i love you » to wake your other half. you wordlessly got yourself ready, grabbed your bag and quietly snuck out. no post it notes were left. no sweet promises or encouraging words. you could do this work trip without him. you were independent. you didn’t need a tin can to chaperone you everywhere. so you left. plain and simple. gone. since you woke up and left earlier than planned, you boarded an earlier train. how lovely and convenient. the carriages were mostly filled with androids. perhaps they were trying to immigrate to canada like the others. who knows. you paid no mind and absentmindedly scrolled through your phone, obsessively checking your messages to see if connor realised. to see if he apologised. because frankly, at that point you were tired of being mad and just wanted to spend the day in his arms. but prideful and petty as you were, you weren’t willing to apologise and admit your mistakes first.

connor roused from stasis a few moments afterward, less bitter and more regretful. he wished to right his wrongs but the normally warm presence beside him was not there. his system was slowly booting back up when his audio sensor picked up an incessant ringing from the living room. he jolted up and rushed out to pick up the ringing phone call and waited for the other side to speak up.

the room was so utterly quiet, a silence so suffocating engulfed the room, that you could hear a pin drop. the voice on the other side asked whether this was indeed your house and that he was indeed connor anderson. he swallowed dryly and answered with a soft, « yes ». running a quick check in his database, he matches the caller’s voice with a certain nathaniel edwards. first responder. he allowed his HUD to display the news. if androids could get pale, have all their blood drain from their faces, his would have certainly done so. he stood, rigid and motionless, consumed by shock and horror.

the news and the first responder’s words blended into one as he gripped the phone tighter: « this morning, at 7:48 am the train from detroit to toronto was caught in a devastating turn of events: the train soon caught in fire and exploded as it made its way over the border. it has been confirmed that there has been 0 survivors. it is unclear whether this was an unfortunate accident or the result of anti-android terrorism. »

the other person’s voice poured through the speaker but he wasn’t listening. he stared blankly in front of him. no way, he thought, it couldn’t have been… the only sign that the android was registering the other man’s input was the now constant red LED.

« sir? sir. i’m sorry to bring this— – no, this isn’t right… you must have the wrong number, he interrupted. there were probably others with your name… maybe they were mistaken... – sir that’s not possible, w— – you must have gotten the wrong house… not… it-it couldn’t have been…» but he knew how improbable it was that they got the wrong number. he was built to be logical, to believe statistics. the statistics told him you were dead. long gone. he hoped and prayed that you stayed back, didn’t get on the earlier train. the statistics told him you did.

he choked out a response, quiet and defeated. you were gone. he’d never get to see you again. « i… i’m sorry… i-i don’t understand… – we tried our best to find them sir, but… the fire was too severe… if we gain any new developm— – you didn’t save them. »

still in a daze, he must have hung up on the poor man and unceremoniously dropped the phone. its clatter the only sound in this deafening silence. the reality of it all comes crashing through and he collapsed, ugly sobs escaping him as the denial faded away to make way for the pure and unfiltered grief. he felt lost. for the first time in a long while since amanda he felt so utterly and completely lost. no more shining beacon during his dark and stormy nights. no more valued affection and coveted kisses. no more notes and no more smile to come home to.

he laughed bitterly, devoid of any humour. it was funny, just how cruel the fates were: made human life so fleeting. lachesisonly gave them such a short eternity. and when he thought you both found your missing halves, bound to another by an invisible string, atropos cuts it. a small snippet that is so easily ripped away from you. he belonged with you, he felt at peace with you. he was able to be what he struggled to be for the majority of his miserable and artificial existence. with you, he was able to be happy.

but now he’ll have to get used to not coming home to a warm embrace. he’ll have to get used to going into stasis alone, in the cold bed. he’ll have to get used to his aching heart being greeted by an empty house. every cold and lonely  nights. it’s ridiculous how human he felt because of you. and he was both thankful and spiteful for it.

sadness and bitter regret ripped through him when he remembered that he didn’t  share goodbyes before he left. he remembered how he couldn’t have apologised to you and tenderly held you. he regretted not being able to tell you how much he loved you and how much you meant to him for the last time. ra9 only knows the things he’d do and the things he’d sacrifice, just to have you in his arms again.

instead he was faced with the bitter reminder that the last thing he’s ever said to you, your last memory of him, was a contemptuous and scornful « i wished i never met you ».

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