#I wanted Adelyn to do more and to narrow down the cast and one thing led to another

[limeinaltime]

I cooked and then I couldn't stop cooking

[inventors-fair]

How Legends Are Made

In general, I’m always happy with the diversity of entries. I’m surprised there weren’t as many uncommon Dominaria or Kamigawa inspired legend themes. It feels like a lot of people came from the same place, and honestly, that makes sense. There aren’t that many cards that create legendary tokens, after all. But the design space is open, and you guys delved!

Let’s get to commentary, shall we?

@3smuth​ — Brother of Flesh

What I’m not understanding is why there just isn’t another card called “Brother of Blood” that this can be paired with, and why it’s a legendary token instead. In my opinion, the concept would have felt better as two cards. Practically, though, this is a bomb legend that puts eight power on board and is a tribal build-around, and frankly, I like it a lot. I just wish it had a better feel.

@ace-hobo​ — Rite of Sadra

I agonized a little over this card. It feels appropriately Zendikar-y, so if that was your intention you succeeded. I am not a personal fan of the X/X tokens, but that’s not a real reason, I’m just prejudiced. Honestly, there’s nothing technically wrong with this card. It doesn’t tickle my fancy, but it doesn’t lose points for any reason either. It’s a pretty fun limited card, something fun to open up, good in ramp decks even in the late game. Name could use some pizzazz.

@allaroundawesme​ — Jiang Yanggu, Journeyman

I applaud you for creating an interesting planeswalker that’s actually moderately well-balanced. I would have made the second ability a -1 or -2, honestly, but that’s about all I can say for that. It feels like Yanggu, so you succeeded there. In terms of technical things, Mowu is just “a legendary green Hound [dog now, actually!] token with “This creature’s power and toughness are” etc.” You don’t need to add */*. Also for that last ability, you need to specify whether or not it’s two mana of any one color or two mana in any combination of colors.

@ceta-maelstrom​ — Ela, Primal Hunter

Another green planeswalker that’s pretty much well-balanced? Dang, y’all on fire this week. However, as much as I understand the bardic reincarnation, it feels weird to have both the ETB and the -4 be the same thing. It feels like you’re pulling the same bear out of the aether, and it negates the legendary sensation that having the specific token is supposed to create. Save this card, change the first ability to “up to one target,” and don’t make the bear legendary.

@dabudder​ — Lavinia, Stoic Defender

I like how you had a new take on a now-familiar legend. Reading up on her was interesting. That said, I don’t feel that this card is worthy of a mythic status. It’s narrow and a little weird, and pretty expensive for a 1/1 with no creature protection. The creation of The Guildpact feels... Off. I simply feel that it should be its own event rather than something Lavinia does on her own. I know it’s vague, but the segregation of guilds on Ravnica means that five-color-ness has to have an impact that this card simply doesn’t. Small note: “monocolored” should be one word.

@dancepatternalpha​ — Sword of Destiny

So, uh, what’s up with that first trigger? Do you create a Human AND put on a counter? Or like, were you going to erase one of those? Not sure what’s going on. It feels fine that the sword isn’t legendary. I think I prefer it. The word “creatures” in Arthur’s ability should be capitalized. Also, current wording is to put the name of the token before the other stuff a la Tolsimir. Mechanically, it’s fine. Good use of colored equipment. Still not sure what’s up with that trigger, if you missed a word or whatnot.

@deeran-moo​ — Rose, Rebellion Leader

In general, it’s best to stay away from non-MTG IP unless the contest specifically calls for it. That’s a general note. As for the card, it would work fine...if I wasn’t a massive fan of Steven Universe with massive story qualms. It’s an interesting choice to have her be mono-red with a white activation. But for one, why does Steven have flying? He floats! Why isn’t he a Gem, too? Additionally, I’m rather upset by the implication that Steven exists as a prison for Rose, which you set up mechanically by having recursion. If Steven goes, Steven goes, and there is no Rose. She’s gone, as the line says. So that’s a snafu. But anyway, for mechanical purposes, she doesn’t need a color indicator, “Strike” doesn’t need to be capitalized, and there doesn’t need to be a period after “haste.”

@demimonde-semigoddess​ — Memory of Wisdom

This is an interesting take. I wonder who’s saying the line of the flavor text. Perhaps a priest, a follower? I remember that kickass art of Kefnet dead and bleeding on the floor. Mechanically, this card’s appropriately mythic, a fine control staple, pretty fun, solid. The word “spirit” should be capitalized, and “7″ should be written out as “seven.” Aside from that... Not bad? Name feels like it could use buffing up.

@dim3trodon​ — Veren, the Haunted

I like a unique counter as much as the next guy. Pretty flavorful. But why on earth does this card say “For the rest of the game” on it? Is that meant to set a rule? An emblem? How does it trigger? I grok it but it doesn’t work in the rules at all. This would have worked so much better as an enchantment with “When ~ enters the battlefield, create a [insert kind of token] with a haunting counter on it.” That said, I appreciate how more things become haunted. I don’t like how if you don’t have any targets it goes to an opponent’s creature because it forces you to target.

@fractured-infinity​ — Amulet of Selenia

So, it creates an Angel token, and this card’s sole purpose is to ensure that nobody else can play it? This is a lot of words to create a token. The flavor is fine, but it plays just horribly. It’s a lot of text to do practically nothing but hate itself. The justification isn’t strong enough to create a vision of the vindictive nature that your flavor text and the story strive for. It’s not a bad flavor, but the execution leaves a lot to be desired.

@gollumni​ — Vance’s Influence

Everything I said about your last card still applies here, pretty much. It’s a build-around-me, it’s poop in limited unless you’re the luckiest player in the world, it’s an interesting tutor, etc. Not a lot to say here, considering.

@hypexion​ — Phyrean Crucible

Did I miss something? I searched, but I couldn’t find the word “Phyrean” anywhere in Magic’s history. Anyway, the wither is an...interesting choice. Can’t say it feels particularly like Mirrodin/NP, but whatever, it plays well for a rare. But you have to have three creatures whose exact power is seven? To make a 5/5? Why? The numbers here feel arbitrary and unnecessarily complicated. “Seven or greater” could have worked, perhaps. Honestly, I’d rather have those three creatures and an artifact that gives wither rather than a token who’s not guaranteed to be as objectively strong.

@i-am-the-one-who-wololoes​ — Azor, the Arbiter of Law // Azor, the Last Guardian

Oh boy. This is...a lot of text. I’ll give points for flavor. But this is just too much. The first ability doesn’t need reminder text, see Domri and Riot, and should be “up to one target.” The second ability costs far too much to just play Sphinx’s Decree. Why not just copy the text from that card instead of the wording you used here? Also, why does he have a color indicator on the front? And as for the flip side... I don’t have anything creative to say. It’s not a reference to The Immortal Sun, it’s a copy, and I have nothing positive to add about that. In reference to this whole card, I would rather have seen your creative input regarding a new token, something unique.

@ignorantturtlegaming​ — Adelyne, Wolf Speaker

Love the flavor and concept here. Mechanically, it could use some work. For one, the first ability only gives flash to wolves on the battlefield, and, well... If they’re already on the battlefield, flash is useless. You’d want to say “You may cast Wolf spells as though they had flash.” Secondly, and someone can correct me if I’m wrong, I’m not sure if the second ability ‘works’ as a replacement effect? I think by the time she becomes the target, it’s too late to give her hexproof, and I’m not sure why this isn’t a trigger. It would certainly be more grokable. “comes into play” should be replaced with “enters the battlefield” on Cheyenne. Still, great great druidic flavor.

@illharg-the-rave-boar​ — To Rule Them All // Lord Sauron

Call me a stickler and a jerk (it’s the only identity I have left), but I’m not a big fan of non-MTG IP for contests that don’t call for it. Oh, but I’ll stop being a stick in the mud. I’m a huge fan of the transformation and your use of a sorcery spell to signify a grand event. The activation should be “Put ~ onto the battlefield from your graveyard transformed” as seen on Startled Awake. Almost corrected to “return” but I learned my lesson there. I love how Sauron can be defeated without the ring. Really, this card’s full of good stuff. I’m just a butt about the game.

@mistershinyobject​ — Nest of the Gremlin King

What a jolly happy name. There are only a couple things that make this card not perfect for me. For one, every instance of creature types should be capitalized — Pest and Gremlin. For two, shift+enter puts the quote attribution on the proper line, and you can use the Mainframe editor to bump the text up and down as need be. For three, I’m not positive why a nest is making creatures attack? Little off in the flavor. For four, I’d rather have a Kaladeshian name than Gizmo. All these are petty things that don’t discount the fact that this card’s fun, annoying, red, annoying, and great. And annoying. I love that little snoot-nosed bastard.

@nine-effing-hells​ — Occult Research // Secrets Best Left Buried

I think the macabre is neato. Everything about this card is creepy, flavorful, evokes the aura you clearly intended, and builds up an implied world. Let’s talk about Revelation. I like it and don’t like your implementation. How to fix it: Make it a keyword action that adds insight counters to permanents, and have three insight counters always do something. Like: “Carbuncled Chemister || 1R || Creature - Human Wizard || Revelation — Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, put an insight counter on Carbuncled Chemister. Then, if it has three or more insight counters on it, it deals 2 damage to any target.” Keep this mechanic around. I like it.

@reaperfromtheabyss​ — Disciple of Madness

Spelling madness backwards. Har de har. In all seriousness, I feel that this card missed the mark. It requires a big sacrifice for a big reward, and I like that. But all the in-jokes fall flat for me. And if you have no cards in hand already, well. “trample and haste” should be separated by a comma. And consider this: what if it said “Each player’s maximum hand size is zero” instead? I know it’s a little weird, and Jin-Gitaxis is a different precedent, but man, it reads better. Gotta have something to do. I like how this card’s a fun build-around for Goblins.

@shakeszx — Haakan, Eternity’s Conduit

Was the name an intentional callback to Haakon, Stromgald Scourge? If so, that’s confusing as butts. As for the card... You are technically correct. A legendary token is being made. It doesn’t mesh with the spirit of the contest at all — oh, “Spirit” should be capitalized — but you are technically correct. I think the exile should target and be part of the activation cost. Aside from that, it’s a fun build-around-me commander. Not broken, pretty neat. Still hung up on the name.

@shootingstarhunter​ — Echo of the True

Er... So, is this card “Echo of the True” or “Spirit of the True?” You have both here. Gotta proofread, my inventor. Anyway, I would look at Rekindling Phoenix for a better notion on how to make that token work. If you give the token a trigger to return a card named [thing] of the True from exile to the battlefield, then that meshes better as a trigger. Points for Spirit God. Maybe I’m exhausted, but I find it interesting. So there you have it.

@walker-of-the-yellow-path​ — Mad Baker

And Urza laughed, and laughed, and laughed again. In all seriousness, one mana for a Food artifact token is busted beyond belief. This card is silly, and I like the idea, but that cheap artifact production is too powerful. “Token,” “Legendary,” “Colorless” and “Trample” all need to be lowercase as well. Flavor text on POINT, though. Love it.

~

Which one of these will influence next week’s contest accidentally? Stick around and find out! Thank you for all your entries.