#I want to go hide in a hole where nobody can find me for a week

[blemiria]

This is by far the smuttiest thing I have ever written

[auspicioustidings]

Kinktober Day 11

Moniker: Alex Risk Level: Low. Alex has never been detained and is visiting freely. Brief: Wax play Safeword: Refer to first brief. Alex is safe, he will take such good care of you. We will enjoy watching it, but if you would rather we didn’t just tell Alex and he will make sure you are out of sight of the cameras but still able to be heard by us - Farah & Gaz

You had only been to a spa once in your life and had hated it. It was awkward not knowing what you were doing when the masseuse left the room to “let you get ready”. How were you supposed to know what clothing came off or how you were to be laying when they came back or where the towel was supposed to sit?

That’s why you had been stiff walking in to find what looked, smelled and sounded like a spa treatment room. Yesterday was… it was bad? You honestly weren’t sure what to call it. So you appreciated that obviously the powers that be thought you needed a break but you couldn’t imagine this would be enjoyable.

It’s a damn good thing Alex found it very easy to prove you wrong.

He was naked, the shiny sheen of scented oil on his skin that smelled like Farah had. Not hard which was kind of a relief because while you wouldn’t object to sex, the bluntness of yesterday wasn’t something you were eager to immediately repeat.

Below the knee of one of his legs was a prosthetic. It was a good model. You knew that because most special forces did, most of you knew several people who had been stuck with low range, cheap ones that were uncomfortable to wear and served to remind them of what they had lost because they had outlived their usefulness as a soldier and so the military had no interest in looking after them. You were glad he had escaped that particular curse.

“Hi darlin’, will you take your robe off for me? You can lay it right there on that chair and then jump up on the bed.”

You weren’t wearing anything under the robe, but nakedness had stopped bothering you somewhere along the way so you shrugged it off. The sort of table sort of bed was comfortable enough when you scooched your ass onto it.

“Ok, here’s the deal. I really like unwinding a wound up girl, and you are wound up something awful.”

“Don’t like unwinding wound up boys?”

“Nah, them I like winding up more” he said with a wink.

Oh no. Oh he sort of reminded you of Gaz, charming enough to be hazardous to your good sense. You were not having a cock in your damn ass today. You just weren’t.

“Are we…” you started, trying not to be crude because, like an idiot, you wanted this roguishly handsome guy with his pretty accent to like you.

Not that you imagined you were coming off very demure when instead of just asking the question properly you gestured vaguely to his dick and then wound up staring at it slack jawed because it wasn’t only his arms and chest that were tattooed. Oh my God, that must have hurt surely? There was Arabic text running around the circumference.

“Farah Karim.”

“I- oh my god sorry, I wasn’t- wait what?”

“That’s what it says, Farah Karim. A woman named Iskra tattooed it and it hurt like a bitch because she was a bitch about it.”

You just stared at him, trying to formulate any response that wasn’t looking at the camera and freaking out because go Farah. Seriously, how did you become more like her? She was wearing the virginity of several women on her wrist and there was a man wearing her name on his cock? You had met international super spies and nobody came close to that level of fundamentally sensational.

“Ah ah ah, no can do darlin’. You’re supposed to be unwinding so stop going goo goo eyed and lay down on your front would you?”

You felt a burst of butterflies in your stomach at the embarrassment of ‘going goo goo eyed’ and were only too happy to bury your face into the bed to hide. There was a hole for your face which you had expected, but it was also oddly shaped. As if it had been created with your exact proportions in mind because there were sunken in parts that your body melted into instead of what you had experienced before which was having your chest and tummy crushed.

“Now I’m gonna start with an oil because the wax will be easier to get off that way. If you enjoy this we can do it again whenever you want, but we’re not gonna go too hard this session darlin’. As much as I’d like to get your chest and pussy flinchin’ from the heat, we’re gonna stick to your backside for today so you can get a feel for it. If you’re amenable to it, after I’d like to give you a full body massage. The happy ending ain’t optional, think you need to relax proper and I’ll need your body to sing to do that.”

“O-ok.”

It put you at ease that he just explained it all for you, although you hoped there weren’t any surprises as he rubbed oil into his hands to heat it and then started applying it to your shoulders.

“My hands will be the only thing of me touchin’ you today darlin’ so you don’t need to tense thinkin’ about if I might sneak around the brief. I’m naked ‘cause I thought it was only fair if I was asking it of you.”

His thumbs dug into your back muscles and you groaned. You knew your muscles were probably tight, but it was so woefully apparent when they seized against his ministrations.

“Sorry” you mumbled, feeling like you were doing it wrong since you weren’t just turning into goo.

“You’re fine, more than fine. Told you I enjoy unwinding girls, so I’m happy to work you until you’re a relaxed ball of melting butter.”

Sounded good to you, but given your previous experience you couldn’t imagine he’d succeed. And given that it was actually pretty painful and you kept flinching and tensing over it, you didn’t get any more confident.

“Sorry darlin’, you got a lot of tension needing worked out. Will get most of it after the wax, just wanted to get the worst of it first.”

“It’s ok. Don’t think massages really work on me anyway. Is the wax going to, I dunno, wax me? Like is it going to hurt taking it off?”

“So little faith in me. Trust me, it’ll work on you. And no, it’s not the same formula as wax for hair removal” he said before running a hand up the back of your thigh.

The knee-jerk reaction was to be embarrassed. You hadn’t shaved since the night before you came to the Kennel, too exhausted to even think about it, so you were all stubbly now.

“If it bothers you I can shave it once we’re done during aftercare since it isn’t long enough to wax. Does it bother you?”

Did it? You wanted to be the feminine ideal of soft and smooth even though you knew that was a weird societal thing rather than actually tied to femininity. And you did like rubbing your legs together like a cricket in bed after a fresh shave. But did it bother you?

“I’m not actually sure?”

And you weren’t. None of them had really cared that you were stubbly, hadn’t mentioned it at all. In fact pretty much everything you were insecure about didn’t seem to factor at all in how they played with you. In a way it was annoying because why had you spent so long thinking these things would be a problem when it came to having a sex life?

“Hm, have a think about it darlin’. Now take a breath.”

You absent-mindedly took the breath, too busy thinking about if it would be weird for him to shave you tonight to even worry why he was asking you to in the first place.

The first drip of wax seared into your skin in a way that made your whole body seize, frozen in a flinch. It felt insane, like it was sizzling through layers of skin and fat and muscle and settling into your bones. But when the second drip landed on your spine you found you liked it.

You liked how it caused your muscles to lose control and rapidly contract at the shock. How the heat spread out through your skin in a web making that one little droplet warm a much larger area.

“Good darlin’?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re taking to this like a dream. You ok with me moving to your ass? Think it’ll look unreal with wax dripping on it.”

“Go ahead” you said on a sigh, surprised at yourself considering you really didn’t think you’d let him near your ass today.

But you trusted him. He was Farah’s for a start. But he was also checking in, explaining everything, giving you the option to say no to one thing without it being a safe word stop. This was more how you imagined a regular intimate moment between two people would go rather than these odd sessions as an employee.

The fat of your ass cheeks took the wax differently, at least it felt like they did. It was sort of like the feeling of Keegan spanking you, but distilled into one tiny spot that flowed like lava before hardening.

Your pussy was happy about it, that was for sure. It wasn’t clenching on nothing as it had been doing throughout all this, instead it was just giving you a lazy stream of wetness, content to enjoy savouring the feeling. How the fuck did Alex do that? Make it so that your body was so in tune with what he was aiming for? So eager to let go of tension and just relax?

He leaned over to whisper in your ear.

“Farah and Gaz are going to be going insane seeing how damn pretty your body looks right now all relaxed and covered in wax. Would put money on him being on his knees eating her out right now.”

“You’re the worst” you whispered back playfully, knowing damn well he knew the thought of it was sure to have you gushing (and it did).

He laughed, masculine and strong in a way that made your stomach flutter.

“Now you’re going to relax. You were a delight taking the wax, well done darlin’”.

You felt like a little kid with how happy the praise made you.

He really massaged you after that. You joked around with him about how he was probably going to give you more bruises that the rest of them combined and he just kneaded harder after saying he took it as a challenge.

At some point everything changed. Your muscles finally loosened off and you felt like you were melting into bonelessness. He got you on your back and it felt like you were getting embalmed with how he massaged into the meat of your breasts with no sexual intent behind it.

Finally, after every inch of you was lathered in oil, loose and warm, he massaged between your legs with the same energy.

You hadn’t realised you could have a non-sexual orgasm, but that’s what it felt like. His touch wasn’t seeking anything for his own gratification, it was purely the last part of a massage designed to reset your body, mind and soul into stillness. You cumming your damn brains out wasn’t the culmination of teasing and fucking, it was just part of this odd, sensual experience.

“There we go, perfect. You’re perfect. That’s it, slow” he said as he helped you sit up and gave you a glass of water, watching you sip at it.

“Bath?”

“Nope, can’t move. Whole body is jelly. This is where I live now.”

“Aww that would be a shame, Farah’s set on making dinner for you and believe it or not Gaz bakes unbelievable cookies.”

You whined, because that sounded great, but you never wanted to move again. He just chuckled warm and fond before getting robes on both of you and scooping you up in a princess carry to take you to get fed and then get a nice long bath. Considering the absolute state Farah had put Gaz in, he was pretty sure he’d be needing to give him one too.

[darkness-follows]

NOBODY ASKED FOR THIS IDK WHY IM WRITING IT

Abuse of power

Shane x Female Reader oneshot

Tw: Shane is a piece of shit, if you watched the Shield or just some of it you'll know. Abusing his Power as a cop. Rough Sex. Rough Oral.

Dub Con kinda stuff guys.

Slapping each other around a bit...Beware. Mention of a bloody kiss. Creampie (Shanes favorite item on the menu)

And minors do not read please.

⚠️⚠️ ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 ⚠️⚠️

Interview time with one of Shanes favorite P.I's.

"I don't know okay.. I swear I didn't hear anything" you sigh, Shane has you pressed between him and his station car, he's always been like that, since you met him, pushy and grabby and overall way too much in your space. He might have squeezed your ass a few times or your breasts... and yeah there was that one time where he made you give him a blow job in the back of his private truck. But other than that? He never took it to actual Sex. And he might be a bit off and uncomfortable but he's never been too rough with you.

He doesn't slap you around or degrade you too much. Sometimes you even think he really likes talking to you.

"Give me something, anything Baby, you don't want me to bust you for hookin' now do you?" He teases.

"I'm not a fucking hooker?!" You try to get away from him but no way, no chance.

"Good luck tryin' to proof that to the Departement darlin' " The evil tease in his voice, the smirk on his face. He makes you sick and at the same time... blowing him wasn't the worst thing you've ever done.

"I really don't have anything Shane! I swear, not a peep at the moment. Not between me and my girls or the idiots we hook up with, alright, I can't help you on this one! Now...let me go" You try to squeeze past him again but he doesn't let you. His hands grab your hips, you can feel his fingers digging into your bones.

"If I find out your lying to me..." Shane warns. He leans in closer, you can feel his breath against your cheek. "I'm going to shove my 9 inches into every fucking hole you got" He pushes you away almost so hard that you go stumbling. But you manage to catch yourself in time. Watching him get in the car and drive off.

Fuck.

You hope that wasn't a real threat because..you just lied to him.

❤️‍🔥

"SHIT" You try to push the door shut again but no chance, Shane already has his boot and then the rest of his leg in the door. He's not alone either, feeling two strong arms wrap around you from behind. "You lied to me Angel! Im so..- heartbroken! You didn't tell me that TJ came to your fucking house to what..? Get a quickie in and hide his god damn coke?" He asks.

"Really hoping he didn't shove it up your ass but I might have to do a little search just to be sure" He grabs your face to force you to look at him.

"No...no- please I swear it wasn't like that. He didn't hide anything! I promise...Shane.. I promise. I tell you where, I tell you" You beg and thank god he nods, the arms release you, fuck, Vic.

"I got this." Shane tells him and you watch Vic slowly leave. That's either good or really bad.

"So? He fucked you and stashed his shit somewhere. Where?" He huffs.

"He didn't fuck me..." You groan. "He forced me to let him in, cried like a little bitch and told me he put the damn powder into a flour jar in the youth Center...-" You sigh. Thank god that Center is on summer break. "Oh, really? Cause he told me a different Story!" Shit. He found TJ before coming here. "What's his Version?" You ask when he looks around your place, not exactly treating your things kindly.

"His story was that he hid it here after he fucked you from behind sweetie, now I don't care which tale is true here. I just gotta know where the blow is at" He points out. After knocking some of your stuff over he walks back towards you, taking a fistful of your hair and throwing you onto your knees.

"THE YOUTH CENTER! Shane I swear! Flour Box in the kitchen cabinet." You look up at him with pleading eyes. Watching him make a phone call and moments later you hear a car leaving your driveway.

"They are going to check that out but darlin' if that is another lie...." he tugs on your hair as a warning. Sitting down on your couch with a loud sigh, he lets go of your hair to light up a cigarette. "Why did you lie, your blowing this whole god damn thing for me, you ain't gonna get any more paychecks i hope you fucking know that" He huffs.

"Because he was crying...like a Baby....I felt bad but I told him there is no way in hell he's gonna leave this shit here..So he took it over there. That's all there is to it, I didn't know you guys cared so damn much for a brick of coke" You frown. "Hey!" His foot kicks into your side "You got no idea what this is about so shut it" He uses your coffee mug as ashtray at least. This whole waiting and sitting around, him on your couch and you on the floor thing is more than nervewrecking. What if TJ moved it and it's not there? Would he...- would Shane kill you?

When he gets a call you prey a little, not being religous at all, but it can't hurt right?

When he gets off the phone you shake...hands trembling, looking up at him with big eyes. "You got lucky this time, Vic found it." Shane mumbles.

Oh thank fucking god.

"That doesn't mean your off the hook, you lied to me." Shane reminds, you watch him stand up again, grabbing a hold of your shirt and then he draws back his right arm, turns his hand into a fist.

"Please don't..- don't hurt me. I'm sorry, god so so sorry!" You claw at his jeans. "Shane. Let me Show you how sorry, please." You open his belt with a nervous smile, dragging down his zipper. He's simple like that, it will work.

His arm lowers itself and in a matter of seconds he's shoving his cock into your mouth, down your throat. Making you Violently choke on it, sob around it, gag on it, all the things you know he likes. It's better than a beating, and even though you hate his fucking guts you can't help but to moan around him. Show him how good you can be, useful, that you suck cock a lot better without a busted lip.

Shane slowly breaks it off to sit down on the couch, watching you follow and lift your arms onto his lap before your head leans back down.

He is simple like that. Which is great for you, works in your favor. Might mean you will get out of this one smoothly. He tugs on your hair but gently this time, hearing a deep rumble and moan coming out of him turns you on. Oh he's been desperate for this, he didn't get off in a while. You can tell.

But to Shane a blowjob won't be enough, not tonight. He lets you treat his dick like a candy cane for a little while longer before he grabs your head with both hand, lifting it off of his hard and aching actual 9 inch cock. You lick your lips and wipe your mouth when you look up at him, he loves this shit.

"He really didn't screw you? TJ.." He asks.

You wonder why he's so strangely curious about it. But when his hand holds your chin and his thumb wipes softly over your lips you smile genuinely up at him.

"No, fuck no, crying piece of shit like that? Im not that desperate." You huff. Licking along his cock from the base to his tip and watching him throw his head back. "Maybe he said it cause he knew it would get to you?" You suggest.

"Get to me? Why would that get to me? I don't give a shit about you or who you spread your god damn legs for" Shane huffs, he seems really annoyed at that. Botherd. So much so that he shoves you off, pulling his pants back on. Why is he always so weird?

"So the idea of him bending me over and fucking me in the ass doesn't bother you?" You ask curiously. He scoffs at you, getting up from the couch and grabbing his jacket. "No" He huffs loudly.

He's lying.

It totally does bother him. Fuck, but he's been so...ugh. That can't be how he behaves around a woman he actually likes right?

"Are you...jealous?" You get up, a teasing look on your face. "You totally are! But that would mean that you like me and- there is no way because you treat me like dogshit" You point out.

He moves to the door but his hand stays on the handle, not twisting it. You can see how he's breathing faster, the anger on his face, how he seems as if he's aruging mentally with himself right now.

"I'm not, and your right, there is no way. You mean nothin' to me darlin' nothin' . But..- you are into that, you love it when I treat you like that, when I press myself against you, when I grab at you, when I pull your hair and throw you around like some 20$ whore from the street corner." He points out. Hanging his jacket at the door before he takes a step towards you again.

"The more you squirm against me, the stronger that urge in you gets to spit in my face or clock me one the harder you make me baby. That's what you know, that's why you do it" Shane does it again, pushing you into the wall and pressing himself against you.

"Your into women spitting on you?" You question with a laugh. Then the back of his hand connects with your face, not hard enough to leave a bruise but hard enough to make you try and squirm away from him again. "Look me in the eyes and tell me you didn't like that" He huffs back.

And then you spit into his face.

You watch him slowly wipe it off with the back of his hand, and then his tongue licks up your spit from his hand. Fucking god.

Whoever breaks first now admits to what the other accused them of. If he kisses you he's gonna admit that he actually likes you, if you kiss him first you admit that you like being smacked around a little.

Shane kisses you first.

Which is surprising considering you had his dick in your mouth not too long ago. The way he's kissing is so demanding, needy, he wants to possess all of you, your mouth, your body, every fucking inch of you. You push yourself harder against him, moaning softly into his mouth when your tongues press roughly into each other.

When the air thins in your lungs you pull back slowly, searching his eyes. "Jesus Shane, really?" You question. He looks guilty, he looks broken that he admitted to liking you. "Vic wanted me to rough you up, not a whole lot, just enough to make you understand that you can't lie to me, to us." He frowns. "He's gonna be so pissed when he finds out I screwed you instead.." He sighs deeply.

"What would that have done? Just because you are scared of someone doesn't mean you magically start yappin' the truth. It would have done nothing to me except for giving me a Black eye or a busted lip." Your hands stroke over his chest, toying with the buttons on his shirt.

"Your right and I'm sorry that I almost.. -" his hand touches your cheek. He almost did it. That's how much Power Vic and the guys have over him.

"But you didn't Shane, and that little backhanded smack-" You shrug. Feeling his hands tickle your sides "I knew it!" He laughs. "You totally liked it, I'm never wrong about my women" He says proudly.

"Can you just fuck me now, Shane? Mark what's yours? Cause I don't want..TJ or some other fucking gang banger. I want you, I want the Cop that had his hands all over me from the day we met" You kiss his jaw.

"Promised you 9 inches in every hole for that lie of yours didn't I? Let's get to work then" He grabs your pants and practically tears them down, doing the same with your panties but being as gross as he is... He takes them and brings them to his nose and mouth. Taking a deep breath.

"God darlin' how do you manage that scent, that's the greatest smelling pussy I've ever known" He comments, you take Note on how he stuffs your panties into the back pocket of his jeans..fuck.

"Remember that Collin guy? You wanted to know so so badly where he was, you pinned me to the car, I was squirming against you, you didn't leave off me and then you took a hold of my crotch. Pressed two fingers between my legs while I started talking about where he's hiding out at?" You huff.

"Mhm?" His hand moves there again, cupping you and pushing two fingers into you.

"Those are the same panties I wore that day. Washed of course but, I think it's a bit funny." You point out. "If I remember that correctly too.. you were beggin' me to stop, wanna repeat that?" He asks.

You bite your lip, rolling your hips slowly into his touch to simulate squirming against him again. "Shane stop...-" You try to squeeze your legs together but his big hand is in the way.

"STOP...- stop stop..- please I told you where he is, that's all I know" You mimic your voice from back then. The expression on his face is adoreable, he really is an asshole but god he's so fucking hot. The way he moves his fingers into you, so deep and steady.

His other hand lifts your leg up, he starts moving against you as if he's fucking you against the wall but it's still only his two fingers. "You better be honest with me from now on, I can only convince Vic that it was a mistake and you will never do it again one exact time. It won't work a second time..." and suddenly the play pretend turns into the Real Deal again.

"Don't care who's sobbing into your ear, you hear me?" His fingers move harder, rough now, Drilling into you at a not so comfortable angle.

"What's he gonna do if it happens again?" You ask with genuine fear on your face and his silence makes your stomach turn. "I vouch for you, for this one, I'd forgive you a second time, he wouldn't. I don't know how he would handle it. Bust you for hookin' somehow." He takes his hand away from your wet core. Licking his fingers with a loud 'pop' before he undoes his belt and zipper, dropping it all onto the floor.

"Turn around" He nods towards the wall.

"No" You huff, not after what he just said?! That Vic would throw you in jail for something you didn't do if you ever forget to tell the whole truth again?

He scoffs at you, hands grabbing your hips, turning you around and pressing you into the wall. "Shane! Shane don't! Im not done talking about this..." You squirm for Real this time. His ego is sickening.

"Well I am" He grobes your behind roughly, spreading your cheeks apart. When he lets go you can feel his tip at your hole. The wrong fucking hole. "No...no no! Shane! I'm serious this time, no. It's gonna hurt so bad, please don't" You hear him sigh loudly, and then he pushes into your soaked pussy. "FUCK" But a whole lot better than the other option.

The snaps of his hips are brutal, but god it's so good. You hate knowing that a piece of shit like him is so damn good at fucking, but most are, aren't they? You moan loud, hands trying to reach back to make his hips go a tiny bit slower but he simply grabs hold of both of your wrists. "God damn Baby, I should have done this so much sooner" He groans. His other hand smacks your cheeks roughly, spreading you open to watch his cock move in and almost out of you over and over.

"You don't ever fucking lie to me again or im gonna have you like this for a few friends of mine, they ain't gonna make it this good though" He huffs. And this time you really want to push him off, but he Hits the spot. He just does. His tip is thick and heated and you can feel it drag over a spot that just feels incredible deep inside of you. And with that speed? You knew he was fit but that's some Athlete kind of shit.

Your shoulder and face softly ache from being forced into the wall, you'd ask him to move it somewhere else but your pretty sure he doesn't give a shit about it.

"So good, so fucking good Shane" You moan a bit extra intense just for him, even though he really is doing a good job.

"Yeah I knew you'd like that." He grabs your hips with both hands thrusting so hard that you suddenly slam with your face first against the wall. You knew you'd end up with a busted lip somehow.

"Ow!" You groan, holding you chin not wanting to touch your lip.

Shane at least is nice enough to stop fucking you raw for a moment, he pulls out and turns you around, gentle hands holding your face. "Shit im sorry..." He seems like he does feel bad about it, but not for long. "Hold on, Hold that pose" He looks through his pants on the floor and takes out his flip phone. Snapping a pic of your face with his hand holding it. Getting a good shot of your busted lip.

"Sending that to Vic! So he thinks I taught you a lesson" He smirks wide.

"Your unbelievable. Fucking unbelievable Shane." You curse his Name, turning away from him.

"Hey im sorry, but it works doesn't it, I didn't see how close your face was to that edge there im really sorry" He turns your face to look at him. Kissing your busted lip gently, feeling his hard cock press against your hip.

You nod while he apologizes. Smiling up at him when he kisses it better. Only to smack him one back as hard as you can. You can see a look in his eyes, it's burning, you've never seen such a psycho look in someone's eyes before.

Before you know it he grabs you, lifts you and carries you to your bed. He throws you onto it, hovering above you before he forces his body between your spread legs. A hand wraps around your throat when he pushes inside of you again he picks up the exact same speed of his hips like before.

Your legs wrap around his waist and all you can do is moan, that's all he can do apparently too.

Your moans, your movements, everything is in perfect sync. His hand lets go of your throat to squeeze your breast, rubbing his thumb over your already hard nipple while he slams his fucking hips into yours. "Shane....Shane...stop!" You bite your lip with a smirk when he looks at you to confirm if you really meant it or if you were teasing again.

It's nice that he checked, you didn't really expect him to.

"Think you can just lie to me you stupid bitch huh? I fucking own you. You'd be a broke whore without me" He looks into your eyes and you can tell, for the first time, that he doesn't mean it. It's not how he really feels but it turns you on either way.

"Please...stop, please Shane" You make your voice Sound as desperate as possible and he fucking cums. He moans so loud that your shitty neighbours start banging against the wall. You can feel his cock throbbing and leaking his cum deep inside of you, shoving it in deeper with every thrust that still follows until you cum too. Your raw fucked core clenches around him while your whole body lifts off the bed with your hand and leg strenght only.

Hand in his hair roughly pulling until your done and your body falls back onto the mattress. His on top of yours.

"Shit.." You breathe out, feeling a drop of blood on your lip but before you can wipe it away he kisses it away. Licking his lips and kissing you deeply again.. a kiss tasting of your blood and he's almost ready to fucking go again. Christ.

Your breathing barely turned back to normal when his phone suddenly rings and he pulls himself out of you.

"Oh good fucking god darlin' wish you could see that, my favorite kinda pie" He chuckles, staring at the mess he made of you when he stumbles around to grab his phone. When he returns he keeps you from closing your legs with a hand. Pinning the phone between his ear and shoulder...moving between your legs. "Ya?" He's on the phone while his tongue drags over your soaked and cum leaking core.

He really is a piece of work.

Your so overstimulated but you don't know who he's on the phone with so you stay quiet.

Your hand strokes through his hair when your hips squirm once more because of Shane.

"Oh yeah she uh, she learned her lesson" Shane looks up at you, silently asking if you did.

You smirk wide and give him a thumbs up before his tongue rolls over your sensitive clit.

You could swear a finger of his is toying around with the mess he made while just casually chatting up Vic on the phone.

"Yeah I'll be there in 10" He mumbles.

But you pull roughly on his hair.

"15..Sorry" He tells Vic and you do it again.

"Imma be there in 30 alright? Gotta take care of something, okay, later" He hangs up and tosses the phone next to you.

"Got 15 more minutes out of this deal Baby, how do you wanna spend it?" He's going to need 5 minutes to get dressed and going and 10 for the ride back to the station.

"Well, 15 isn't enough to get me ready for anal so we might have to do that some other time. So, honestly?" You look down on him placing soft kisses onto your lower stomach.

"You can make it up to me now, how you've been treating me since we met." You tug on his hair again and you don't even have to tell him twice, he's so eager. "Yes Mam." He lowers his head.

And for the next 15 minutes you let him work his tongue, you make him clean up the mess he made inside of you. And give you as many extra orgasms as you desire...

You could get used to that, but god he's a dick!

❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

EYY Thank you for reading, I really really hope you liked it!!! (I did not spellcheck this. Apologies)

Tags: @justme12200 @its-in-the-woods @dichromaniac @coolranchdavidian @thotslayers

GIF Credit: https://www.tumblr.com/theshieldfx-blog?source=share

[matchingbatbites]

as close to me as i can (18+)

Read on Ao3 | 1.2k

The kit had been Eddie’s idea. 

He could lie and say he doesn’t know where the idea came from, but he does. It’s been brewing in the back of his mind for a while now, ever since he saw it on one of their trips to the nearby sex shop.

He’s noticed, of course, how Steve can get sometimes. How he’ll check himself out in the mirror, how he’ll primp and preen until he looks like absolute perfection. It’s easier to see now that they’re actually living together, but that also means Eddie sees how he hides it from others, how he makes sure to keep his vanity to himself.

Eddie has had the best time pulling it out of him, has loved watching his boyfriend become more and more self-centered in a way they both adore. Eddie loves drowning him in compliments, both casual and filthy, loves that he’s able to help Steve build up his self confidence into something that others might even call narcissistic. Not to them, though.

He wasn’t sure if the kit was taking things too far, though. He’d been worried when he suggested it, and was glad when Steve lit up at the idea, when he instantly went pink with desire and pulled Eddie into their bed at just the thought of it. Eddie had gone the very next day to buy it, and two days later, they find themselves here.

“Does that feel good, baby?”

Steve’s hands clench at the bedding and he moans into the mattress below him, his back arches deliciously as he presses his hips back to meet every thrust, and Eddie can’t help but to stare at how gorgeous his boy is as he fucks Steve with the dildo. It came out better than they had hoped, the silicone firm but not rigid, and even though Steve had whined about how weird the plaster-like casting had felt on his dick, he certainly isn't- 

Actually, he's definitely whining now, all high and needy like he does when he wants Eddie to go harder, to make him feel it for days. Eddie doesnt give in yet, he wants to make this last as long as possible, but he can’t resist a bit of teasing, especially when it makes Steve flush all the way down to his shoulders.

"Yeah, that feels good. It’s such a nice dick, perfect for making pretty boys feel good, hm?”

Eddie smacks a hand onto Steve's ass just to hear him moan again, and then he pulls the dildo out completely. He leans in to spit into Steve's fluttering hole before shoving the toy back in again, and he soaks up the lovely noises his boy makes as he picks up the pace. He never thought he would get this hot from watching his boyfriend fuck himself on a replica of his own cock, but god, Eddie doesn't think he's ever been this hard in his life. 

“Do you like this, Stevie? Like getting fucked with your own dick? Is it good, gorgeous?” 

Steve moans and nods and Eddie slaps him again, squeezes the flesh under his hand as he says “Gonna need more than that, baby. C’mon, use your words for me, tell me how much you love it.” 

He drives the toy deeper and Steve gasps, his hands clawing at the sheets as his thighs start to shake. “Fuckin’ love it! Love it so much-”

Another smack. “You love what?”

“My dick! Love getting fucked by my dick, feels - fuck! - so good!”

Eddie adjusts the angle until Steve is wailing under the onslaught of pleasure, until Eddie is almost worried that Steve’s legs might give out from how much he’s trembling. It’s heady, knowing that he can make Steve feel like this with nothing but a toy and some filthy words, and the thing that makes it even better is that Steve is just as into this whole thing as Eddie is.

“Such a narcissistic little whore, baby. Nobody else’s dick is good enough for you, huh? Just your own, ‘s the only one perfect enough for you, only one that makes you see fuckin’ stars like this, yeah?”

Steve gasps and nods, and he’s almost pulling the sheets from the mattress with how he’s tugging at it. “Fuuuck, ‘m gonna come, Eds, please! Don’ stop!”

He’s close, so close. Eddie can see it in how he shakes, in how he sobs as Eddie growls out a “Come on, Stevie, do it, gorgeous. Fuckin’ come from your own cock.” He picks up the pace and gives Steve’s ass one more hard smack, and that’s all it takes to shove him over the edge.

Steve screams when he comes, the sound muffled slightly from where he’s pressed into the bedding, and Eddie just watches in absolute wonder as he fucks Steve through it until he’s a twitchy, whiny mess. He pulls the toy out slowly and drops it to the side, doesn’t hesitate as he pushes his pants down and barely spits into his hand before he’s stripping his own dick, almost frantic in his pace.

“So fuckin’ pretty, Stevie, so good for me. Love how filthy you are, love how you’re just as freaky as I am, love the things you let me to do you.” Eddie’s babbling, but his mouth always tends to run when he’s close and Steve knows it, groans in response. “Fuck, ‘m gonna come, baby. Where d’you want it?”

He expects a groaned response, or the delirious Anywhere, please that he usually gets. Instead, a thrill of delight runs through him as he watches Steve reach back to grab his ass with one hand, spreading himself as best he can. 

“In me, Ed, please. Need it so bad.”

Eddie complies and grabs Steve’s hips before pushing into his hole, still slick with lube and relaxed from his orgasm. Steve keens as Eddie thrusts two, three, four times before coming so hard that he sees stars for a moment. His hips jerk as he fills up his boyfriend, and Eddie groans when Steve twitches a bit with oversensitivity, clenching around him involuntarily. He takes a moment to catch his breath before he pulls out, and dots a few kisses over the moles on Steve’s back as he waits for his legs to start working again. 

Once he can feel his toes he stands from the bed, quickly grabbing a washcloth from the bathroom and a glass of water from the kitchen before joining Steve agin. Cleanup is quick and practical, and he makes Steve drain the glass before he’s climbing back into bed and wrapping around his boyfriend like an octopus.

“So, I think that was a good investment,” he says after a moment, and Steve hums.

“I definitely agree. We should use it again, though, just to make sure we get our money’s worth out of it.”

Eddie grins and can’t resist giving a soft nip to the shell of Steve’s ear. “Oh trust me, pretty boy, I am already thinking of plans for the future.”

[simpingresponsibly]

Yess!!! Cowboy dream would be great

We need cowboy dream

I did actually write a Rivals duo cavalry fic that's admittedly a couple years old at this point but does involve Dream and horses <3 I just think it's neat,,

all cowboy Dreams are good cowboy Dreams!!!! here's a snippet that got out of hand for you. because I am who I am it's a bit of a blend between ccDream team and cDream team

--

Dream's used to being on the road. He likes it. Gives him space to think, to plan, to explore. He loves riding horseback, coaxing his girl to go just a bit faster, a bit longer, with an apple from his pack and a pat on the neck. It's a bit lonely, sometimes, but Dream's used to being alone. Even when he was back east, he used to travel long distances between towns to visit his then-girlfriend. He learned to love the ride, even if he doesn't think of her often anymore.

When they told him to go west, young man, he wasn't sure what he would find. It's lonely and big but the sky is there and the stars are close when he sleeps under them at night. Sometimes that's all you need.

Nobody knows who he is when he rolls into town. The bandana covering most of his face, to protect from the dust and the sun, probably helps with that. He's looking for a better life, but all of the grifters who roll through probably are.

He wants to build a homestead, a real community house, to shelter people like him. And against all odds, he manages to scrape up enough money and support to start building it. It's mostly legitimate jobs at first, but anyone who wanders these parts knows that Colonel Beast offers the best wages for the most detestable work.

Rather than help the ex-Confederate maintain his empire, Dream prefers cutting at the flesh of the great beast where it will make him bleed. Because cash seems to run through his veins, it drips straight into Dream's pockets.

Dream's perfected the art of dropping down silently onto the top of passing trains from nearby cliffs and robbing them for all they're worth. Often railway bonds, sometimes weapon stores, sometimes cold hard cash. Sometimes people are the cargo, and he's been known to set free a chain gang or two.

That's how he first meets George; covered in soot and up to his elbows in engine grease on one of the Colonel's steam locomotives. The protective goggles he wore reflected Dream's own masked face back at him as he pointed the barrel of the gun.

Don't want no trouble. Dream had assured him. Just stop this here train so I can alight, you won't ever have to see me again.

That's too bad. George had grinned. I could go for a bit of trouble.

There was room enough on the horse for two, and covered in coal like he was, George blended easily into the night with him. They slept under the rock formations that night, around a low fire. Dream was only mildly surprised that George hadn't decided to rob him blind when he woke.

Sapnap was a surprise: The son of a sheriff with too much to prove and a chip on his shoulder. On his lapel the star still gleamed with polish, glinting in the light. He rode after Dream and George, Wanted poster gripped tightly in one hand.

The sheriff's boy was a fine rider and they were slower on his girl's back with two. Deaf to George's protests, Dream dismounted and sent them on ahead with a slap to the horse's behind, to hide in the skeleton bones of the house they were building.

After he was taken into the jailhouse, Dream saw his opportunity. Whispers exchanged through the bars of a cell door, talking to Sapnap about all the cowardly things in this world and how he didn't have to be one of them. Telling him of adventure and riches and houses with enough beds for three.

When George blew a hole clean through the side of the jail that day, Dream pulled Sapnap along behind him.

Two horses between three of them and home on their minds, they rode out into that blazing sunset. If you were to see them again, well, you'd probably wish you hadn't.

[sanyu-thewitch05]

Yandere! Bully! x Fem! Reader

TW: Suicide, suicidal thoughts

A/N: This piece was requested by ElinaHiganbana on Wattpad.

Kofi: Wanna buy me a coffee?

🍓🍓🍓🍓🍒🍒🍒🍒

It was senior year and the night of prom. Everything had been going well until it was time for the slow dance. That's when you saw your boyfriend kissing your best friend on the dancefloor. You feel tears run down your cheeks and ran to your hiding place in the woods. Now, you're sitting on the grass, looking at your pitiful reflection in the stream's water.

Maybe I was right to come here looking for a way to end it all? I always felt like I belonged in water. Maybe Adin was right when he said I'm stupid and worthless. Isn't there a beautiful estuary around here?

You take off your silver high heeled shoes, and follow the stream. You smell saltwater and start to cry more. Your feet and the end of your dress are stained brown with mud. Maybe by some mercy of a god somewhere, you'll live.

Meanwhile, your longtime bully, Adin Crossworth, is looking for you on the dancefloor.

"Does anyone know where Y/N is?" Adin asks aloud.

"She ran out of here after seeing her boyfriend locking lips with her best friend," A girl named Eva answers, sitting at a table.

Adin stomps to your boyfriend and pushes him against a wall, keeping a steady arm on his neck.

"If I find Y/N dead tonight, I'm coming to kill you and her so called best friend. Now where is she?!" Adin threatens, trying not to kill him right then and there.

"The woods. She loves the woods, specifically the stream. She wanted to see the estuary nearby someday," Your ex-boyfriend answers, stuttering.

Adin throws your ex to the side and runs out to his car. He takes off into the woods and parks in a ditch nearby the woods. He runs into the woods and follows the stream. He sees the high heel holes in the ground until they stop in a spot where moonlight hits the water.

"Y/N! Where are you?" Adin yells, hoping you're nearby.

A loud splash nearby makes all the alarms in his body ring. He sees your footprints and runs until they stop. When he gets to the estuary, he sees your dirtied shoes tucked inbetween the roots of a mangrove tree.

"No. Nononono!" Adin screams, looking for any sign of life. "Y/N! Come out! This isn't funny!"

Nothing but the sound of frogs, birds, and the stream respond to him. Then, bubbles float to the surface and pop. Adin's eyes widen, and he throws his coat and dives into the water. He desperately searches for you, and eventually, finds your body on top of a mangrove root. Adin puts you into his arms, bringing you back to the surface. He checks your pulse, and feels nothing. He immediately begins CPR. After ten minutes that felt like eternity, your eyes flash to life, and you're throwing up water next to Adin's shoes. You cough for several minutes, then focus your blurry vision onto Adin.

"Why? Why couldn't you let me leave this miserable life behind?!" You cry, tears streaming down your mascara- stained cheeks.

Adin holds your head on his chest and lets you cry till you feel better.

"Sh, it's ok. I've got you," Adin whispers, holding a gentle hand on the back of your head.

"Why? Just why?" You weep, clinging to your bully's chest. "I though you wanted me, the miserable, stupid, worthless bitch that nobody loves, gone?"

"No, I love you. I'm an asshole for bullying you, but I should have dealt with my feelings for you in a better way. I want you to be mine. I want you to feel safe and loved with me."

"Well, it looks like you're the only one who loves me now."

"I want to say that's true, but I know your family and real friends love you."

You kiss Adin, and you both makeout like it's just you in the world. Maybe it's the lack of oxygen in your brain, but you enjoy every minute of his lips on yours.

"Can you stand up?" Adin asks, holding you tight.

"Yes, I think I can," You answer, grabbing your heels.

"Great, we can go to the hospital. Once you're ok, I can take you home or do whatever you want."

"Can we get some food on the way there?"

"Of course, my love."

Adin helps you into his car, and you two drive off into the night. You two silently sit in the ER, and eventually you're in a hospital bed.

~~~~~~

Two days after you are discharged from the hospital, Adin takes you back to the woods when the night begins to shine. Your prom dress is as good as new, and the high heels are just as clean.

"Adin, I thought I told you I didn't want to remember this night," You say as you look at the moonlight hitting the stream.

"I know you don't want to remember prom, so I'm remaking it into something better," Adin says, holding your hand as he guides you to the estuary. "Welcome to what I call the Night of Lovers."

Time slows as you look at the fireflies in jars strung onto tree branches. A small boombox is sitting on a mangrove root, and there's a trail of giant lily pads leading to weeping willow on a small island.

"How'd you do this?" You ask in shock.

"I asked some of my buddies to decorate this place while you were in the hospital," Adin admits, kissing your hand. "Do you like it?"

"Are you kidding me? Yes!" You reply, jumping on Adin and kissing him passionately.

Adin spins you around a little and gently place you on the ground. He removes your shoes, and carries you princess style. He thought the wooden platforms underneath the lily pads would hold you both, but he was wrong. You both go crashing into the water, and you giggle. Adin carries you through the water, putting you on the small island. Music starts to play, and you two slowdance. You rest your head on his shoulder, taking in the smell of salt water on both of you. Adin's hand goes to your wet back keeping a firm hold. He kisses and dips you before leading you to the weeping willow with a blanket near the roots. There's a basket with two blankets.

"Adin, what's all this?" You ask, leaning your back on the willow.

"The best night of your life," Adin responds, kissing you again.

Your leg wraps around Adin's leg, and he kisses your neck. His hands pull down your zipper, and you slide to the blanket. Adin takes off your dress and his coat. He strips the rest of his clothes away, leaving a trail of kisses on your chest. You guide his head toward your crotch, and he looks at you eagerly. His tongue comes out and slowly licks your pussy.

"Adin!" You squeal, your thighs wrapping around his head.

Adin begins to lick your pussy faster, and your moans become erratic. He kisses your folds, and suddenly your stomach feels funny.

"Adin, I-I feel strange!" You cry, not knowing what to do.

"It's ok, baby! Just focus on the pleasure," Adin replies, returning to eating you out.

"Ah! Aha! Adin!" You moan, cumming on Adin's tongue.

His tongue pulls out of you, and you rest a little on the weeping willow. Adin swallows your cum, then gently tugs at your panties.

"If you want to end it here, I'm ok with that. I'm ok with anything you decide," Adin says, looking up at you.

"I wanna go further," You state, cupping his face.

Adin smiles and takes both his and your panties off. He puts you in missionary position, looking at you with love.

"Are you ready?" Adin asks, kissing your cheek.

"Yes."

Adin puts a condom on his dick, then slowly sticks his penis inside you, making you flinch. He waits for you to adjust, then puts the rest of himself inside you.

"Adin, it hurts," You cry, trying to get used to him.

"Do you want me to pull out?" Adin asks, holding both of your hands.

"Wait, no! Just give me a couple of minutes! I swear I'll be ready to continue! I promise!" You plead, making Adin sigh worriedly.

"Y/N, I don't want to hurt you during sex. I don't want to hurt you ever again."

"I know, but I want this."

Adin waits for you to be ready, then sees your head nod. He pulls out of you slightly, and thrusts softly.

"Hn!" You moan, arching you back. "Adin, more."

He stars to thrust at a moderate speed, sending you into bliss.

"Hgn! Ah! Y/N!" Adin moans, holding both of your hands.

He kisses you while thrusting, making you go crazy. Adin thrusts faster, and your body feels electric.

"Adin, I-I love you!" You cry out, feeling your high reaching its peak.

Adin stops moaning and thrusting.

"I love you too, darling," Adin says, feeling a shiver of pleasure move through his spine.

You both cum together, and stay together, for a minute. Adin kisses you, and you turn his single post sex kiss into a makeout session. Both of you leave hickies on each other, embracing your newfound love for each other.

Adin pulls out of you, and reaches into the basket for the second blanket. He places it over you, then cleans himself up. You look at him and want his touch again. You move closer to Adin, then throw the blanket on both of you.

"Let's stay here until the sunrise," You say, holding his arm.

"As you wish, my love," Adin replies, kissing your forehead.

The frogs and birds singing in the estuary lull the two of you to sleep. You fall asleep on Adin's chest with your lovely new boyfriend holding you tightly. 

[writing-house-of-m]

Falling for you

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Summary: Natasha is in love with you and decides to tell you

A/N: I was so impressed with myself when I came up with the title lol The request can be found here. Comments, reblogs and likes are appreciated!

Prompt: "Oh, I'm falling in love."

"It was when I saw you giving flowers to Wanda once. I saw the gesture and it hit me like a ton of bricks. The way you looked at her. I wanted someone to look at me like that. I learned afterwards not 'someone,' I wanted you to look at me like that.

"It was as if my mind held up a queue card telling me how I felt about you. I realised, 'Oh, I'm falling in love,' but the more I thought about it the more I realised I've been in love with you for a while and I didn't know what to do."

Natasha started speaking after you made a joke about her playing hide and seek. Nobody knew where she was when you noticed her missing for a while and got curious where she might have been. She was looking out at the view motionless before you got there for you don't know how long.

You regret making your joke.

"I don't even know why I'm telling you all this. Maybe because I'm sick of holding it all in.

"In the red room it was always 'love is just something used to brainwash childish minds', 'A chemical reaction, nothing more' and for the longest time I agreed. I have never experienced it before and didn't think I ever would…

"Until you."

She looks at you emotionally. It's the most vulnerable you have seen her. The 'Black Widow' on the verge of tears because of you,

"Natasha,"

And there is nothing you can say to make her feel better.

"I do love you, just not in the same way. I'm really sorry," you see in the way Natasha drops her head, the devastation she is feeling, "but my heart will always belong to Wanda."

She lets out a sad laugh, looking out at the setting sun in the horizon, orange and pink painting the sky, "Figures," she scoffs, "the person I fall for, already taken," she says, sniffling.

There are a few moments of tense silence before you decide to break it, in hopes to lighten the mood a little, "Well, if it's any consolation Wanda aspires to have your 'hot bod'," you jest, then raise your hands and eyebrows innocently, "her words, not mine."

It does make her laugh but shortly after, silence prevails and you both bask in it. You stay there in each others presence long after darkness takes over and white dots fill the night sky.

…

Shortly after your conversation on the roof you move out of the compound. It was something you and Wanda had been discussing anyway but you thought it would be easier for Natasha if you weren't there. To you it would have felt like you were rubbing your relationship in her face after her confession. But for Natasha, she missed seeing you everyday.

As always life continues, work takes over. Your time together is reduced to when you are assigned to the same missions. Natasha realises quickly her feelings for you will never falter. So she makes the most of the time she gets with you.

It doesn't take long for that to be taken from her as well.

…

Natasha felt your presence missing from this world. Prior to everything that happened, you hadn't been at the compound for the longest time but at least she knew you were out there and happy. But now? There was a gaping hole in the shape of you that was missing and it was unfair for everyone, not just herself.

It is why she makes the decision to go to Vormir.

The world is better with you in it.

Even if she won't be here to witness it.

As she is falling to her demise, the sound of wind rushing past her ears she closes her eyes to see your smiling face.

The memory of you stood on the rooftop trying to make her laugh. The picture can be compared to a piece of artwork with the way the warm setting sunlight hits off your skin and makes your eyes shine.

Natasha is glad to have such a picturesque image of you in her final seconds that she can find comfort in behind her eyelids.

Despite the cold climate and the circumstances her body is filled with warmth knowing she is the reason there is the possibility to bring you back. At least then you will have a chance at starting that family you and Wanda announced.

As that final image slips away along with her consciousness, Natasha thinks about the fact that even though she could never have you. You always had her.

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

As skeleton is chilling in his garden, a random man digs a hole in the lawn, looks around, apologizes because he got the wrong garden, then disappears back into the hole, all of this in two minutes. Reaction?

Undertale Sans - Uh. He tells the man there's no problem, and doesn't move from where he is, just taking a bath sun. He should probably be concerned that he thinks it's perfectly normal, but it's too much work. He puts back his sunglasses and goes back to snore.

Undertale Papyrus - Wait, it's legal to dig tunnels on the Surface? Nobody told him that! He waited his whole life to dig tunnels! He runs to his shed to grab a shovel and starts digging a tunnel to Undyne's house.

Underswap Sans - He's not too happy about a random stranger intruding his yard, but... At the same time... Free tunnel, dude! He jumps head first in it and starts to crawl, laughing like a gremlin to see where it's going. Blue loves too much rolling in the mud.

Underswap Papyrus - He doesn't feel safe. He goes back inside and starts to block all the doors, just in case. He doesn't like that random people can enter his yard when he doesn't pay attention. That's creepy. He also calls his brother for advice only to watch in despair as Blue jumps into the hole to find who's digging...

Underfell Sans - He's not happy. Wrong or not, the guy is not getting out like this. He makes a tiny blaster and sends it into the hole, and then he shoots. He's very satisfied to hear the man screams in agony. Also, there's now a huge crack in the yard and the house floor and Edge is going to kill him. First, he attacks, then he thinks about the consequences...

Underfell Papyrus - Like hell they're getting away. Edge doesn't care he's too big for the hole, he's crawling after the guy. Or at least, he tries. After like three minutes he realizes he can't crawl further, but that he also can't crawl backwards... He hates he has to call Undyne for help. Undyne who will just hits him "accidentally" with her shovel again and again just because he can't move and she thinks it's funny. If he sees that man again, they're dead.

Horrortale Sans - The man meets with Oak, on all fours, growling angrily, his big eye staring at him. The man decides it's best to retreat and slowly disappear inside the hole. Oak attacks, angry, and starts to dig to get them, but after like two minutes he gets tired, collapses head-first in the hole, and decides to sleep there lol. He even gets lectured by his brother who thinks he's the one who made the hole.

Horrortale Papyrus - Oh hell no you don't leave. He uses his very long arms to grab the man by the ankles and drags him out by the feet. You're not leaving before he lectures you for entering his yard illegally! What do you think this place is? A zoo?

Swapfell Sans - He grabs a huge rock instinctively and, screaming the aliens are attacking, smashes the guy on the head a good thirty times before realizing that it's actually a human and that... Well, he's dead now. Oh well.... He's already in a hole in the ground, so he just pushes it back and buries him there.

Swapfell Papyrus - The man is staring at him in shock. Rus is staring back. "Are you a martian?" "sure am, bud. wants me to make a martian noise?" "Please, yes! I waited for this all my life!" Rus rolls on the ground, making the 200 rubber chickens hiding in his jacket scream in agony. Thanks to Rus, the man is sure he's on Mars and that Rus is some sort of local alien. Rus thinks it's too funny and plays along. The guy is so disappointed when a random human walks in front of the house he goes back into his hole to cry.

Fellswap Gold Sans - When the man gets out, he finds a gun pointing at his head. Wine just says "NO." and the man, scared, quickly retreats back into the hole and crawls away in fear. Wine blocks the way with a few big rocks and goes back to whatever he was doing before this.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - He was watering the flowers when suddenly one flower transformed into a grown-up random human. Coffee is speechless. And terrified. Are all the flowers transformed into humans? Well, that's terrifying and he hates this. He throws his watering can at the man's head and runs inside, screaming for help.

[theidiotwhowritesthings]

INEVITABLE [7]

din djarin x female!reader

warnings: language, discussion of illegal trade goods

word count: 2,600

Summary: It was like fate or destiny had planned from the beginning for you to be on the run from the law. With the words ‘I can bring you in warm, or I can bring you in cold’ adorning your rib cage you always wondered what was worse: Knowing you were bound to being wanted or realizing your soulmate was a cursed bounty hunter. You had a mission to finish and no bounty hunter, soulmate or not, was going to stop you.

[a/n: the next one is gonna be much longer than these short updates im sorry]

[previous][next]

07: A FAVOR FOR A FRIEND

.

"fortune favors the bold."

.

“Din, this place is a shit hole.”

He couldn’t find the words to reply, and it wasn’t because he didn’t agree. Thyreps was a shit hole. Nobody came to this world because they wanted to⏤ it was a world of poor convenience. Din was speechless because every time he heard you say his name it felt like his heart would get stuck in his throat. A pathetic and sad reaction that he wished he could get over, but even after two days of traveling to Thyreps he had not. In fact, since he was already being pathetic, Din could admit that with every single time he heard you say it he grew more obsessed with the sound of it leaving your lips.

“Din?”

“Yeah.” Din grunted out. He cleared his throat and gave a small nod as the two of you stared out of the ship's glass to the orange and red world below. “You’re not wrong. Imagine Jakku, but worse.”

“Maker.” You scoffed and leaned back in your seat. “I didn’t think a place worse than Jakku existed.”

“Unfortunately, there is.”

“Gross.”

Din chuckled under his breath at your obvious disgust at the world. He couldn’t even offer comfort because your reaction had been entirely accurate. Din hated Thyreps. The last time he had visited had been ages ago, before Grogu even, and it was because he had followed a quarry there. He navigated the Razor Crest down to the capital city’s main tarmac. It wasn’t overly large or busy, but that’s because Thyreps wasn’t overly large or busy. 

“What exactly will the Reaper be able to give you?” Din asked as he rose from the pilot chair and hit a few buttons to lock up the Crest’s console. “Viktor’s location?”

“Nah. Viktor is in Canto Bight.” You replied.

Din’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He shook his head. “Then why don’t I just take you there? We can do what needs to be done.” 

There was a pause of silence that made him nervous. He watched as you pasted on a false smile before responding. “He’s not where we can reach him. Viktor is hiding underground with the 1% of the galaxy that’s escaping trouble. You need a pass to get in and only a few souls have access to that sort of thing. That’s what the Reaper is gonna give me. Information on how to get one so I can sneak in and kill Viktor.” Briefly, your voice steeled. “And I meant that. Me. I will sneak in, and I will kill Viktor. Not us.” Din realized the mistake he had made with his words and he stiffened. “I appreciate your help with this, Din, but I’ve come too far to let someone else cut in and pull the trigger before I can.”

“Right. I didn’t mean⏤”

“Viktor is my monster to get rid of.” You finished then turned to leave the cockpit.

Din hesitated to allow you the space to slip away into the cargo hold alone. That was stupid and reckless of him. The atmosphere with you had gotten so comfortable, especially with you using his name, that Din forgot that you were still skittish with this topic. He meant his words. There was nothing he wanted more than to rip Viktor to shreds with his bare hands. It had been a long time since a person evoked such a visceral rage in him, but this stranger had. Despite that, Din knew what this journey meant to you. He would never take that closure from you.

After another beat, Din followed after you and climbed down into the cargo hold. The ramp had been opened and he saw you lift a groggy Grogu from the hammock to hold. The boy had been sleeping and with the way he curled into your arms, Din could tell he was still far from fully awake. Din would be lying if he said he didn’t like seeing you and Grogu together. The boy was growing more and more attached to you, and you seemed so good with him. Din’s only fear was that Grogu was getting too attached. When the mission ended, Viktor was dead, and you left it would be devastating to the boy. Din had already stupidly gotten more attached to you than he should.

“Hey⏤” He began.

You cut in first. “I’m sorry.” Grogu was resting his head on your shoulder and you were rubbing his back while you spoke. “I didn’t mean to snap at you like that. I know what you meant in general, and I really do appreciate your help.” You twisted your lips and gave him a small shrug. “My first instinct tends to be either sarcasm or hostility.” 

Din let out a soft laugh. “No. It’s fine. I…I should have worded that better.” He came closer at the sound of his voice made Grogu turn with grabby hands. You chuckled at the sight and met him halfway so Din could scoop the boy out of your arms and cradle him to his own chest. “I know how much this means to you. I do. I’d never take it from you, mirdala runi.”

“I know.” You nodded and he could feel the sincerity in your words followed by an awkward shift where you tried to backpedal. You rubbed the back of your neck and began to walk to the ramp. “So, uh, what are we waiting for? Let’s go explore this garbage planet and find this guy, yeah?”

“Yeah.” Din chuckled. With Grogu in one arm, he rooted through his weapon closet to arm himself. A few steps away you were playing with the strap of your bag and waiting. When he finished, he nodded for you to follow and once the two of you were out in the heat of Thyreps on the tarmac rather than the Crest he hit a button on his vambrance to lift the ramp and lock it. “If we find my source then she can tell us where the Reaper is right now.”

“I can’t imagine this city has many cantinas.” You replied then chuckled. “Hell, there can’t be many on the entire planet.”

“No, but I thought we might save ourselves the time of sitting in every single one for a few hours.” Din teased with a small smile.

You lightly shoved your shoulder into his, “Ha. Funny, bucket head.” Din glanced over at you in amusement. Your smile had taken that very real quality to it that he loved to see. “The Mandalorian has jokes. What a riot.”

“You’re not the only one with a sense of humor.” Din hummed.

“I never said I was. I just said my sense of humor was funnier than yours.”

“I’m pretty sure there’s a difference between being funnier and being less humble.”

You laughed in response and Din knew that sound was in tough competition with hearing you say his name. Din had never prided himself on being funny. He tended to be dry with his humor and people either got that or they didn’t. Being able to make you laugh, his soulmate, made his heart hum in content.

Din led you into the city and as they walked down the mildly crowded city streets, Grogu began to rouse and wake up more. Now he spun his gaze in different directions to curiously take in their surroundings. As the three of them passed a few market stands, you paused to buy two kabobs with an unfamiliar meat and vegetable on it. You handed one to Grogu who didn’t hesitate to dig in while nibbling on the other yourself. 

There was an old boxing gym near the center of the city. It was one of the only buildings Din was familiar with so finding it hadn’t been too difficult. Leading you inside, Din scanned the room for a familiar face. The gym was filled with people training or working out, but off to the side leaning against the wall was his old friend. Though the term ‘friend’ was technically relative. 

“Ari.” He called out and the woman’s head snapped to meet him with a curious gaze. However, her dark eyebrows furrowed at the sight of him. “I need a favor.”

Ari’s blue eyes suddenly widened in recognition and she pushed off the wall to approach. Her dark hair was messily pulled up into a ponytail and she clapped her hands with a laugh. “Mando! Maker, how the hell are ya?” She continued to drift closer until she stood not too far away. Ari motioned to him. “I like this new look. Shiny.”

“I need a favor.” Din repeated.

“Yeah, yeah, I heard you the first time. Geez, always business with this one.” Ari snickered. She glanced at you and Din quickly made introductions. Ari gave him a skeptical look, “I never had you pegged as the type to indulge in the slave trade, Mando.”

Din felt the blood leave his face at even the thought of what Ari was thinking. He spluttered to explain, but you let out a sharp laugh and shook your head. “He isn’t. I’m just a tag along he picked up.”

“Good. I don’t tolerate that kind of shit in my house.” Ari nodded. She pointed to Grogu next. “And what the fuck is that?”

Din bristled at the tone, but he bit back on his temper. He knew Ari didn’t mean harm. She was just blunt and crass and a giant pain in his ass on the best of days. “This is Grogu.” At his name, Grogu turned and offered the woman a small wave as he finished off the last of his kabob. “He’s my son.”

“That’s not a real name, but sure.” Ari raised an eyebrow at him. “I thought you were human though, weren't you? What the hell did you fuck to get⏤”

“Ari.” Din snapped. “The favor.”

Ari rolled her eyes and motioned for them to follow her. Din blew out a sigh, and you leaned in closer to speak. “So, she’s…interesting.”

“She’s a smuggler. Runs her crew from this place.” Din explained.

“How’d you meet her?”

“She was a quarry.” Din said. He met her long before he crossed paths with Grogu. Din had picked her up with full intentions to turn her in, but the woman offered him an ingot of beskar for a ride to Jakku. Knowing she picked places like Jakku and Thyreps to reside made him question her already questionable sanity.

You chuckled and he watched as you pointed to yourself, then to Grogu, then to Ari who walked a few feet ahead. “Do you ever actually turn in any of your quarries?” Din laughed and ignored the surprised look that Ari threw over her shoulder at him. “I’m kind of serious.”

The Ari woman had led them into what looked like a small back office. She sat behind the desk and Din motioned for you to take the only seat in front of the desk. Din. It still felt unusual to know his name even days after he gave it. You fell into the seat, and Din lowered Grogu to rest in your lap while he rested his hands on the chair’s back so he could lean there.

“Alright. Favor?” Ari asked.

Din nodded once and you let him take the lead since he knew this woman better than you did. “Yes. We need to find the Reaper.”

“Ew.” Ari blanched. “Who the hell wants to find him?”

You lifted a hand with a sheepish smile. “That’s me, I suppose. I need info from him.” Ari paused and motioned to you with her hand obviously fishing for more. You shifted uncomfortably in your seat before nodding. “Well, I need a pass in order to get into Canto Bight’s underground.”

“The Golden Ring?” Ari scoffed. “Yeah, okay, you do need Reaper for that. Unfortunately for you.” She leaned back in her seat and crossed her arms. “You need to go to Reti.” 

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, and apparently Din was equally as confused by this information. He spoke up from behind you. “Why do we need to go there? I thought the Reaper hangs around in one of the cantinas here. There’s nothing on Thyrep’s moon but dust and trouble.”

“Correct.” Ari nodded. “However, if you want a favor from me then I need a favor from you.”

“You owe me one.” Din scoffed.

“No.” She dragged the word out. “We became even when I gave sent you a message on that one quarry you were searching for way back.” You glanced over your shoulder at Din whose shoulders seemed to slump in realization. “Exactly. This’ll be easy though. Tit for tat.”

Din sighed irritably, “What do you want?”

“There’s a smuggling camp on Reti. A Twi’lek named Dorsil stole some goods I planned to fence myself. I want my stuff back, is all.”

“What stuff?”

“Just some weaponry parts.”

You could feel Din stiffen behind you as he repeated his words once more. “What stuff?”

Ari shot both of you a sheepish smile. “Disruptor cores.”

“Are you out of your kriffing mind?” Din snapped. You didn’t know enough about the weapon parts to understand the issue. Din shifted so he stood behind you rather than behind as he continued to argue. “Cores don’t travel well.”

“Yeah, I’m fully aware of that, Mando.” Ari scoffed. “I’d go get them myself, but…”

You raised an eyebrow, “But what?”

“But I don’t wanna, and I got you two here looking for a favor.” Ari replied. “It’s like kismet.” Her eyes glanced back to Din and a grin adorned her features. “So? How bad do you need the Reaper?”

Din was silent for a moment before he nodded once. “Get me the coordinates.”

Ari pumped her fist once before rifling through her desk looking for something. You stood up and set a hand on Din’s arm. Grogu squirmed to be let down so you set him on the chair before pushing Din aside. “How dangerous is this?”

“It’s risky, but if done right everything will be fine.”

“You could say that about literally anything, bucket head.” You replied. “Give it to me straight.”

Din blew out a soft sigh, “Cores are highly volatile before they’re built into the weapon. It’s like carrying around a box of explosives. In theory, it should be fine, but under the right conditions⏤ or wrong conditions, I guess I should say⏤ they’re quick to ignite.”

You twisted your lips. “If you think it’s too dangerous⏤”

“No. We’re getting you the Reaper’s location.”

“I don’t want to put you or Grogu at risk for this.” You argued back and surprisingly it tasted of the truth. For so long, you assumed there wasn’t a price you wouldn’t be willing to pay for the information, but it seemed you had been wrong. You found the line in the sand you couldn’t cross.

Din set his gloved hand over yours on his arm and shook his head. “Everything is going to be alright. I promise, ner mirdala runi. I will get you the Reaper’s location.”

Ari called out that she had the information on hand, and he turned his attention back to her. You crossed your arms in thought. Of course you wanted to know where this man was. He was the next step in getting to Viktor. However, you couldn’t shake this foreboding feeling in your stomach that this was a bad idea.

mando'a translations

ner mirdala runi: my clever soul

taglist:

@onceinamando @hrtsforpascal @lil-dragon-draws @harriedandharassed @aheadfullofsteverogers @elfamosotoga @the-anchored-sailor-girl @garbo-lesbo @moonlqghts @stokeholdsblog @morks-watermelon @http-onie @chonkercatto @xalphafox @pedrojoe @zarahbronstein @cockscombkingdom @ale0m @shelbyteller @fallinallinmendes @grandtheoristpeach @perilous-pasta @love-the-abyss @kneelforloki @insomniac-nerd-posts-things @marvelouslytrekking @lady-winchester @liadamerondjarin @vampseddie @guccistardust @smexy-bucky-waifu @mayaaaaah @theway-thisis @keepingitlokiii @catharinaroxastova @andreasworlsboring101 @theclassicvinyldragon @your-slutty-gf @i-cant-write-for-shit @ponyboys-sunsets @honeybug-victoria @godesspsyche @cookielovesbook-akie @adoringanakin

[sodamnradd]

Hermione is alone on the porch when he arrives.

Everyone is asleep inside, drowsy after Molly’s Sunday roast and countless bottles of celebratory champagne.

Her stomach twists into a thousand tiny knots.

“Congratulations.”

“Don’t,” she says sharply, another knot welling up in her throat.

Beneath the amber lantern, his eyes are bloodshot. The last time they saw one another, they were bright and melting, burning holes into her skin that she wished to fill with him.

He stuffs his hands into his pockets and stands there, looking at her.

She can’t stand the weight of his gaze, so she stares at her knee. At her hand on her knee. At the sparkling jewel nestled around the finger of her hand on her knee.

“I still read Muggle literature,” he says, sitting beside her.

They used to discuss Muggle books for hours, far past curfew, hiding in empty classrooms where nobody could find them.

She notices he’s holding a slip of parchment.

“Different material, though,” he resumes. “Poetry. You know how you would look at the oil landscape on the fourth-floor corridor and say a storm was brewing, but I envisioned it as the end of one?”

“It was literally titled ‘Brewing Tempest’.”

“Not,” he taps her knee with his, “the point.”

She smiles.

“Poetry is kind of like that. Imaginative. Inclusive. Even a stranger can read a few lines and feel at home.”

“Why haven’t you written to me?”

“I was giving you time to be with your friends. You missed them.”

“I miss you.”

The parchment rustles in his hands. It’s folded eight times over. He folds and unfolds it restlessly. “I’m not a writer.”

“I know that.”

“Neither are you,” he adds, insulted by how quickly she agreed.

She breathes a laugh. “I never claimed to be.”

“Do you know what a haiku is?”

“Did you write me one?” she asks, amused.

“No. But I found one that expresses how I’ve felt these last few weeks, watching you slip away. It’s by an American poet. Billy Collins. Maybe it’s too late to give it to you, but I knew I’d regret if I didn’t at least try—”

Hermione snatches it from his hands.

Draco rebukes her impatience, but he rambles when he’s nervous and she's brimming with curiosity.

“Where are you going?” she calls after him.

But he’s already halfway gone, shaking his head like he can’t stand to be there anymore.

Heart in her throat, Hermione reads:

He may compare you

to the dawn, but I

stayed up all night to watch it.

She reads it again.

Twice more.

And then she’s running.

“Draco!” she cries, afraid the pop of Apparation will go off before she can stop him. “Draco!”

It’s too dark and she hasn’t cast a Lumos spell and she can hardly see where she’s—

“Oof!” he gasps as she barrels into him.

It’s the sweetest sound she’s ever heard.

Hermione throws her arms around his neck.

“I made a mistake! I never should have said yes. You didn’t write, so I thought you didn’t want me. You never said anything at school. But I’ve felt this awful regret since the moment he put the ring on my finger and I know it’s because of you. I know—”

He cuts her off with a bruising kiss, pressing into her with such conviction, a thousand knots come undone. Hermione buoys.

The next day, Ron awakes, groggy and hungover.

Alone.

A letter sits on his bedside table. Hermione’s engagement ring sparkles on top.

(588 words, prompt: it's a poem, I read this haiku by Billy Collins and remembered this prompt and had to do something with it.)

[smutgallore]

Please Don't Prove 'em Right

Chapter 1

Draco Malfoy x Fem!Weasley!Reader 

Minors DNI

Word Count: 2500+

Inspired by Sabrina Carpenter’s song “Please Please Please”

“I said I’m helping you, not Voldy-tits. If that means we have to go into hiding, so be it. But I love you and I’m not letting you go through this alone.”

Summary: You are Ron’s twin sister, in Gryffindor, and best friends with Harry and Hermione. As a Weasley, you have heard all about the Malfoy’s. But none of that stops you from falling for Draco Malfoy. Slight AU. Smut will happen in later chapters.

This has been written to where they are 18 in the 6th year.

Warnings: Enemies to lovers, Angst, confessions of love, bullying (sort of), mentions of blood, dread, etc. 

---

Malfoy. The first time I heard that name it was followed by a grimace from my father, along with an immediate groan of dislike from my mother. 

“What has Lucius Malfoy done now, dear?” My mother asked my father. Knowing that whatever it was, wasn’t good.

“He somehow managed to convince the Chief Warlock and the rest of the Wizengamot that he was under the influence of the Imperius curse while doing He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named’s bidding. That man is pure evil as I’m sure his son will be.”

---

“And my names’ Malfoy, Draco Malfoy.” There that name was again. And I knew from what my parents had said, that name meant no good. 

Ron sniggered as Malfoy introduced himself. 

“Think my name’s funny, do you? No need to ask who you are.” His eyes stray over to me, his pupils dilating as soon as we make eye contact but quickly shift back to my brother. “My father told me all the Weasleys have red hair, freckles, and more children than they can afford.” My hand balled up into a fist as he turned back to Harry. 

“You’ll soon find out some wizarding families are much better than others, Potter. You don’t want to go making friends with the wrong sort. I can help you there.” Malfoy extended his hand out expecting Harry to shake it. 

What he didn’t expect, was for my fist to make contact with his nose. And as he sat there crying, saying that ‘his father will hear about this’, I knew my parents were right. The Malfoy’s were no good.

---

And it seemed the name ‘Malfoy’ would continue to plague me for the rest of my life from that moment forward. Since I made a fool of Malfoy on the first day of school, he decided to make my life a living hell.

“Hey, Carrots. How was your summer?” Malfoy’s arm wraps around my shoulder. “Enjoy staying in that hobbit hole you call a house?” He always seems to find me as soon as I board the train.

“Shove off, Malfoy.” I bring my elbow to collide with his ribs, effectively removing his arm from my shoulder. “I’m actually trying to find my friends. I’m sure that’s a hard concept for you to grasp since nobody likes you.” His face contorts into a look of hurt; probably because of my elbow.

He opens his mouth to say something until he sees my brothers, Fred and George, heading toward us. “Whatever Weasley. You’re not worth my time anyway.” He mutters as he leaves.

“What’d Malfoy want?” Fred asked. He and George joined me as we made our way through the train. 

“Do we need to prank him? Maybe turn his precious blond hair pink?” George conspired, grinning at the thought. 

“As amusing as that sounds, no. He’s just being a prick as always. I can handle him.” I say as I find Ron, Harry, and Hermione in our compartment. “See you later.” I wave them off and take a seat next to Hermione.

“Malfoy already giving you issues?” Hermione asked, bringing her head from behind her book. “You’d think he would be over what happened our first year.” Shaking her head in disapproval. 

“I did punch him in the nose in front of our whole class Hermione. I’d hardly think he would want to be friends after. Not that I want that bloody git as my friend.” I said a grin making its way to my face. 

---

The fifth year is where it changed, where Draco changed. Around my family and friends, he was still a pompous bully and complete arse. But around me, he started to act differently. 

He stopped calling me names and bullying me. Instead, he was being nice. He would joke with me, help me with schoolwork and I would help him. We started to build a friendship. A secret friendship, that is. 

And eventually, it evolved into more. We were at the library, studying into the night. Everyone had already made their way to the common rooms. Everyone, except us.

“Hey what did you get for number 4 in potions?” I asked looking over my work. 

“Uh… hold on, I gotta find it.” He said as he flipped through his papers, moving books and flinging things off the desk. “Here it is.” He shouts yanking the paper from underneath his open ink barrel.

In that instant, the ink went cascading to the floor, leading to a growing stain on the carpet. “Shit!” We both exclaim as we rise in a hurry to clean up the mess. 

Instead of being smart and using my wand, I try to gather as much ink in my hands as I can to prevent the spread. “Y/N. Did you forget you’re a witch?” Draco smiled in amusement. 

I blush as I realize what I was doing. “Oh, right.” Draco pulls his wand from his pocket and quickly casts ‘scourgify’. 

I’m left staring at my now-dyed hands and knees. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up,” Draco says grabbing my elbow to help me.

He leads me to the closest bathroom and quickly turns on the water rubbing at my hands. 

“Thanks. I can’t believe I was so stupid.” I say as I look up from the black puddle in the sink. That's when I realize how close we are to each other and so does Draco.

We stare into each other's eyes, the ink long forgotten. It's as if gravity is pulling us closer until our foreheads touch. “Ca… Can I kiss you?” Draco whispers.

I don’t answer and simply bring my lips to his. In that moment everything seems to fade away. My hands meet his face as his arms wrap around my waist, pulling each other closer. Nothing has ever felt so right and so wrong at the same time. 

Our foreheads meet again as we pull apart for air. “That was… wow.” I gasp out. “We should do that more often.” I giggle.

His lips meet mine again in a quick peck, leaving me wanting more. “Y/N I need to tell you something.” He says making me worry. “I… I love you.” 

I’m shocked. “What?” Not sure I heard him right.

“I love you.” He repeats pulling away to look into my eyes.

“I…” I stop my reply as I notice black ink all over Draco’s face and neck. “Oh my Godric. Draco…” I’m cut off.

“It's okay if you don’t feel the same, I’d understand why you wouldn’t but I just couldn’t hide my feelings anymore. I’ve loved you since the day I met you. I’m so sorry for bullying you while I should have been loving you. Nothing will ever change how I feel for you…” As he speaks, he drags his hand across his face, creating a unibrow and beard to match out of the black ink.

I couldn’t help it, I just started laughing. As I’m struggling to catch my breath I notice the hurt look upon Draco’s face. And that immediately sobers me up. 

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t laughing at you Draco. Well… I mean I was but not at what you were saying.” I gesture for him to look in the mirror. 

As he does, he realizes what I was laughing at. His laughter cuts through the silence as he looks back at me. “Oh great Salazar Slytherin. I can’t believe I just said all of that looking like this.” His laughter bringing me warmth.

I smile, looking into his eyes. “I love you too,” I confess, bringing his laughter to an end as he realizes what I said.

“You do?” He asks, slightly unbelieving. As I nod my head yes, he closes the distance between us again and brings me into another kiss. This one was different from the last. It seemed to seal our love for each other.

---

“Don’t worry. He’ll be here in a minute.” Ron said between mouthfuls of jello. I grimaced as he shoveled another mouthful in.

“Will you stop eating?” Hermione said hitting Ron with her book, punctuating each word. “Your best friend is missing.” 

“Oi. Turn around, you lunatic.” Ron said gesturing toward the doors.

“He’s covered in blood again.” I hear my sister, Ginny say. I look at the person in question and see blood pouring from his nose. “Why is it he’s always covered in blood?”

“Looks like it’s his own this time,” Ron replies, unsurprised.

“Where have you been?” Hermione asked, concerned. 

“Yeah, and what the hell happened to your face?” I asked, my eyes widening. “Looks like you’ve taken a bludger to the face.”

“Later,” Harry says. “What’ve I missed?” He disregards our questions.

“Sorting Hat urged us all to be brave and strong in these troubled times.” Ron starts filling him in. “Easy for it to say, huh? It’s a hat, isn’t it?” 

My attention drifts from the conversation to the Slytherin table, searching for the familiar head of blond hair. My eyes connect with his bringing a smile to my face, but he adverts his eyes.

“Very best of evenings to you all.” Dumbledore starts, bringing the hall to silence and my attention to him. “First off, let me introduce the newest member of our staff. Horace Slughorn.” A small applause arises. “Professor Slughorn, I’m happy to say, has agreed to resume his old post as Potions Master. Meanwhile, the post of Defense Against the Dark Arts will be taken by Professor Snape.”

A confused murmur of Snape’s name spread across the hall as the Slytherins applauded their head of house.

“Now, as you know, each and every one of you was searched upon your arrival here tonight. And you have the right to know why.” An eerie feeling had settled over the hall. “Once there was a young man, who, like you, sat in this very hall, walked this castle’s corridors, slept under its roof. He seemed to all the world a student like any other. His name? Tom Riddle.”

More murmurs arose at the mention of the name.

“Today, of course, he’s known all over the world by another name. Which is why, as I stand looking out upon you all tonight, I’m reminded of a sobering fact. Every day, every hour, this very minute, perhaps, dark forces attempt to penetrate this castle’s walls. But in the end, their greatest weapon is you.” I notice Dumbledore’s gaze move to Draco.

“Just something to think about. Now, off to bed. Pip-pip.” I rise from my seat on that note, hoping to catch Draco as he leaves.

“That was cheerful,” Ron mutters. I simply nod as I make my way out. 

“You guys go ahead. I’ve got to speak with McGonagall.” I say, separating from them in search of Draco.

“Don’t be too late, curfew is soon,” Hermione says heading up the stairs.

I walk away heading to our designated place, the astronomy tower. As I round the corner I see him sitting with his legs dangling off the side, resting his head on the railing.

“Draco,” I whisper as I approach him. Sitting beside him. “How was your summer?” I bring my arm to bump into his side.

“We should break this off.” He mutters, sounding nothing like the Draco I know.

“What? What do you mean?” My smile falls.

“We should break this off. It’s dangerous.” He says, his voice shaking.

 “I don’t care. I love you, and nothing will change that.” I bring my hand to reach for his only for him to pull back.

“You shouldn’t. I’m not good for you. I don’t want you to get hurt.” His voice sounds watery. I turn him to face me and see tears trailing down his face.

“Oh, Draco. Tell me what's going on. Somethings wrong, tell me.” I say pulling him into a hug. 

As my arms wrap around him, the dam breaks. His body shakes as he cries into my shoulder. I rub my hand up and down his back to calm him. His breathing evens out as he pulls away from me.

“You’ll hate me,” his voice quivers. “I didn’t want this.” Tears pour from his eyes in a steady stream.

“Draco, love, I could never hate you. Tell me what’s going on.” I reassure him. He looks at me reluctantly as he pulls his left sleeve up, revealing the dark mark. I gasp in surprise as I pull his arm toward me. A sense of dread washes over me. 

“I promise I didn’t want this. I… I had no other choice. You have to believe me.” His voice pleads as I look into his eyes. 

“I believe you,” I whisper bringing him into another hug. “How’d this happen though?” I question. “Your… your dad, he’s… He couldn't have caused this.” I trailed off.

“It's because he’s in Azkaban that I have this. The Dark Lord needed somebody and because my father wasn’t there, he turned to me.” His voice shook as he began to explain. “He threatened to kill my mom and… and you.” 

“What? How does he know about me?” Confused and scared, I rose to my feet. “Nobody knows. How could he…”

“Legilimency.” He looked down at his hands in regret and fear. “I didn’t know until it was too late.” 

“Well, that means it's too late now. You’re not getting rid of me now. We’ll figure this out. A way to get you free from this. Your mother too.” I say as I pull him to his feet, cupping his face with my hands. 

“Y/N, this is dangerous. I don’t want you involved in this.” He grabs my hands and looks pleadingly into my eyes. “Promise me you won’t get involved.” 

“I can’t do that, and you know that. We will get this sorted out. Maybe we can tell Dumbledore.”

“No Dumbledore can’t know. My… my mission is to kill him.” I gasp at that. 

“Well, we’ll just have to stall as long as we can. I’ll teach you occlumency so you can keep him out of your mind. And we’ll go from there, okay?” I say as I grab his face again. 

“If anyone were to find out you’re helping me, you’d be considered a traitor. I can’t let that happen, you would lose your family.” He says in shock that I would offer my help.

“I said I’m helping you, not Voldy-tits. If that means we have to go into hiding, so be it. But I love you and I’m not letting you go through this alone.” I reassure him bringing my lips to his cheek.

---

Masterlist | HP Masterlist | Draco Malfoy Masterlist

[alollinglaughingcat]

i... accidentally discovered 100% Wolf and im absolutely going insane

something i like to do for fun is to watch kinda of shitty animated wolf/dog/animal movies like, yknow, like Pets United or Underdog, or, famously, the Alpha & Omega series, mostly cause i see some YT review about how bad/goofy they are and it's something to waste an hour or two

and i saw a 100% Wolf bad review and was like "ha another bad wolf furry movie! i'll watch that. oh it has a sequel movie coming out soon? cool. oh, it has a series? with two 20+ episode seasons? oof the series probably butchers the quality/integrity of the movie... i'll watch the movie but the series will probably be to bad to watch---"

AND THEN I WATCHED THE SERIES AND IT. IT WASN'T BAD.

granted im only up to like episode 14 or smthn before i HAD to take a break (literally i watched the movie this morning and i havent taken a break for ANYTHING) (except feeding my foster kittens)

BUT LIKE???? it's not GOOD quality necessarily, either in animation or plot or character development, like I'd say it's kind of like Miraculous Ladybug quality, but a little worse? but i just LOVE it. i LIKE the characters. i ENJOY the silly little plot. i LOVE that it just fucking??? does things??? and never gives you answers to them???

like hello??? Batty the 100% DOG gained the ability to go were-human and NOBODY QUESTIONED IT OR INVESTIGATED IT FURTHER??? (but i love Batty's character and i love how she got voted the pack leader instead of the main character or his rival even if it didn't stick and i love how she wanted to return to being a normal dog at first but then grew to love her werewolf pack and she doesn't wanna go back and the episode where she was like 'what is my future after the academy if i cant join the night patrol? what do i want from this new life?' was MUAH CHEF'S KISS even though that ALSO did not technically get an answer/resolve)

and what happened to Cherry????? is she on the good guys side now or is she still on the bad guys???? hello???? she was evil for like TWO episodes and then got redeemed and rejoined the good guys again except HELLO REMEMBER that she was probably in cahoots with the OTHER secretly-bad-guy-pretending-to-be-a-good-guy and said guy (Ric) just??? never confronts Cherry for abandoning the bad guys???? even though he SHOULD??? unless Cherry is secretly still on the bad guys side???? WHAT IS HAPPENING WITH CHERRY??? I NEED ANSWERS (and i hope there IS answers in the future but knowing this show its just gonna forgor about it XDD)

AND WHY IS RIC SO SIMULTANEOUSLY STUPID AND SMART??? one episode he's literally evil mastermind and it's so expertly written and i LOVED the foreshadowing for him being the secret evil guy except now that he's revealed to be the evil bad guy he's so stupid sometimes???? why'd they butcher you bro 😭😭😭

SPEAKING OF THE BAD GUYS JUST. FUCKING CHILLING ONCE THEYRE REVEALED TO BE EVIL. what's up with Hotspur??? he was literally the movie villain big baddie who like tried to literally MURDER all dogs and also imprisoned his brother and basically tried to murder his brother and his nephew (LITERALLY Scar-Mufasa-Simba style lmaoo they didnt even try to hide it and its so fuckin funny to me) and then we enter the series and he's just???? allowed to continue being a respected werewolf elder and also running his evil dog shelter??? i get that the series is almost sort of a 'separate/alternate canon' but technically at the end of the movie they also showed him just like?? doing community service?? i literally find it so fucking funny that when someone tries to commit an Evil (see: Cherry, Ric, Hotspur, etc.) the rest of the characters are all like "hey i know you tried to murder me but just do some community service and you can join the pack again kay? 🥰"

but despite the little plot holes the series still seems to run so smoothly and i just love how it knows the right amount of seriousness to take itself, and i love how all of the characters work together... like they could have just had Ivan be a stuuuupid bully forever but within the first few episodes they were already showing him being a better person and being a good member of the pack, all while still keeping his personality... like he even tried to protect Batty's secret!!! even though he was being dog racist you KNOW he would still protect Batty and Freddy with his life even though they're dogs because THEY'RE HIS PACK!!!

also i just love how Freddy LIKES being a dog! like obviously in the movie he reached the conclusion that dogs weren't bad/inferior and he was fine being a pink poodle instead of a big scary werewolf like the rest of his family, but i was afraid the series would revert him and make him all "oooo im just a stupid dog i want to be a powerful wolf!!! no one takes me serious!!" but nah, in the series he's literally like "being a dog is the fucking best and if you disagree you can fucking suck it 😎" AND in 200% Wolf the whole plot is going to be that he DOES get transformed into a wolf and he WANTS TO GO BACK TO BEING A POODLE!! i love that!!

i also love Batty, did i already mention that? i love that she is literally a dog. she is a DOG, who happened to end up being able to turn into a human because of unexplained magical shenanigans, and she still acts primarily like a dog even when human, and she's just so fucking awesome, and my only wish is that she actually got to be the pack leader instead of that being a one-off thing lol. i also love Scarlet too, and i really really really hope that as like the opposite to Batty, Scarlet ends up getting turned into a dog/werewolf lmao. let the wolf hunter become the wolf!!!! if it can magically happen to Batty, it can magically happen to Scarlet XD

also more Cherry please wtf is going on with her i love her

anyway i just needed to ramble because this is my new obsession and i am not going to be able to shut up about it 😭

[bitkahuna]

no but this was hard as fuck and I'm proud

-----

“Who let you in a pub?” Sirius almost looked impressed.

“Invisibility cloak.”

Sirius nodded. “Right.”

But Remus wasn’t so quick to dismiss the situation. “How were you allowed out that late? You’re still thirteen! Don’t you have a curfew?”

Harry shrugged. “The Leaky Cauldron's unlocked till midnight.”

The lycanthrope blanched. “Are you-? Is- Harry. Please don’t tell me you’re staying at a tavern.”

“He only charges me half price.”

The two adults looked at each other, their faces conveying various levels of stress and concern.

“It’s where I stayed last summer.” He added. “Sirius used to follow me around.”

Remus looked at Sirius with wide eyes. “You knew?!”

“I was in hiding! Not like I knew he was doing it again this year! I figured he’d hole up with the Weasleys or something. Molly and Arthur keep offering.”

The werewolf’s face suddenly changed, as if struck by some brilliant idea. “That’s it! I’ll tell Molly. If she finds out, there’s no way she’d allow you to-”

“No!” Harry cried. “I like living on my own!” He insisted. “Besides,” he hesitated, thinking on his words. “I’ll stop telling you things. You know I’m going to keep doing stupid stuff, but at least this way you know about it. Wouldn’t it be worse to have no idea what I’m up to?”

Remus only stared down at Harry with a dropped jaw, while Sirius let out a laugh. “He’s got us there, Moony.”

“I already paid for the room anyway.”

Remus squinted his eyes, turning from Harry to Sirius. “You’re just going to sit there and laugh? You’re his godfather! He’s your legal responsibility!”

“Not yet. Dumbledore’s still getting my charges dropped. I don’t know how he’ll get me off for escaping, though.”

“Morally, he absolutely is your responsibility!” Remus took a deep breath before turning to the boy. “Harry, there’s some biscuits in the kitchen. Why don’t you go help yourself?”

Harry nodded, taking the cue and leaving the room. But he still listened in on their grumbles to each other through the closed door as they tried to keep their voices down. They didn’t do a very good job.

Remus began, "Really, Padfoot? Don’t you care at all about Harry being a homeless runaway?”

“Of course I care, but what am I supposed to do?”

“You may be on the run, but you own a fucking house. A house that nobody lives in! You aren’t helpless; you can give him a place to stay. And if you did, that old house elf of yours could keep an eye on him.”

“Kreacher?!”

“Yes!”

“Remus I know it’s been a while, but surely you must remember the absolute devil of a house elf that old man is! He’d hate Harry. He hates me!”

“Not like you make it very hard! Either way, you’d better come up with something. You’re his godfather; James chose you.”

"I didn’t ask him to.“

There was silence for a while. Even Harry swallowed at such a comment.

Did Sirius not want to be his godfather?

“How dare you.”

Harry’s eyes widened. He’d never heard Remus sound like that before. Not even when they confronted Peter. It was low, like the rolling thunder before a vicious storm.

“I know you’re mad that escaping Azkaban and killing Peter didn’t solve all your problems, but this is your life now, Sirius, and that boy is part of it. I know he spoke to you all the time in the Forbidden Forest. I know he’s told you things he probably hasn’t told me. He trusts you, Sirius. He loves you! James’ boy loves you, Sirius. And you’d dare to say something so heartless!”

"Remus, I-" Sirius' voice faltered. He sounded broken.

"Harry needs more than just a godfather," Remus continued, his voice tinged with a barely restrained anger. "He needs a home, Sirius. A family. He needs guidance; he needs someone who is not going to abandon him at the slightest inconvenience."

"I'm not abandoning him!" Sirius snapped.

"You might as well be!" Remus retorted. "You're too focused on your own problems to see what's happening right in front of you! He’s living in The Leaky fucking Caldron! He’s hanging out in Knockturn Alley! Not even you were ever so desperate to run away from home."

"And you think you're doing any better?!"

There was a brief, tense silence and Harry could picture the two men glaring at each other.

“I didn’t mean it like that, Moony. Of course I love Harry; I’d do anything for him. But …” Sirius’s voice faltered, “I just don’t know if I can be what he needs. I’ve been locked away for over a decade, and before that, you know as well as anyone else that I was never very responsible.”

“You don’t have to be perfect, Sirius!” Remus’ voice was laced with frustration. “You just have to be there for him, and right now that means giving him a safe place to stay. I'm not his godfather!" Remus finally said, nearly shouting. "I'm not the one James entrusted with his son."

"You're right." Sirius conceded after a pause. "You're not his godfather … maybe you should've been."

Harry felt sick. His arms wrapped around his stomach as he hurried towards Remus’ sink on shaking legs. He took a deep breath and tears flooded down his face as he held back nausea.

Sirius didn't want to be his godfather.

Sirius was rejecting him.

This was fine. It’s fine. Certainly, it’s fine. The Dursleys didn’t want to be his family either, so why does he care what some stupid escaped convict dogman thinks?

His legs trembled, and he sank to the floor, grabbing an empty bucket from under the tap and ducking his head inside, just in case. He was so tired of being sad.

"HOW DARE YOU?!” Remus roared.

“No! No, I didn’t mean it like that!”

“You're not just James and Lily's old friend anymore! You’re Harry’s family!"

"You're right, Moony!" His voice was strained. “I don’t know how to do this. I can barely take care of myself!”

“How about you start by thinking about him and not yourself for two fucking seconds, I’m begging you!”

[weeping-statue]

Hi, can I get a scenario with yandere Chrollo and kidnapped afab reader where Chrollo overheard reader’s secret 18+ thoughts about him

Ofc<3 I hope you enjoy! Request are open!

“I wasn’t supposed to hear that, but I think deep down you wanted me too.”

-Nsfw- minors dni

———————————————————————

Chrollo was a.. simple man.

As long as you were behaving and kind, you could have your bit of freedom.

Meaning, walking around without supervision, sleeping next to him, feeding yourself, and maybe visits to the outdoor garden that he installed just for you.

But when you had your outbursts, he couldn’t just be lenient. No, cause then you’d get more ballsy, there might even be belief you could walk all over him. And as much as he loved you, he couldn’t have that.

There were places and roles you had to abide by. But you’d learn it one way or another, either by trial and error, or by brute force.

He had been denying you the outdoors, his time, and touch, for too long, which ended up making you stir crazy. Of course you knew your captor was an incredibly evil man, that had a lot of things to do. But if he was going to hide you away from the world until you both took your last breath, at least make it enjoyable.

You lay in your shared bed, hand softly rubbing circles on your clit as you thought of him. Oh how you missed him. The times he used to rub your thighs, softly trailing up to the place you desperately needed him.

A part of you started to worry he didn’t want you anymore, that maybe he found a new woman to focus his attention on and this was his subtle way of telling you it’s over.

But the sparks of pleasure from where you were touching began to overwhelm your worry with a new feeling. Gentle whimpers grew louder, the more wet you became. Moaning out his name as a finger plunged into your tight hole. “Chrollo- I need you so badly, please just fuck me, I promise I’ll be good-”

Eyes screwed shut, feeling the pleasure build. You didn’t even notice Chrollo silently listening in through the crack of your door. A hand slowly reaching his pants to palm his growing erection with a hint of shame.

How disgusting does he have to be to do this outside where any of his members could see. Such an act, is an extremely private matter, that nobody should even know about.

But he can’t help it, not when you’re moaning out for him. It just stirs up something inside of Chrollo that makes his brain go numb.

Fingers find their way to his belt, slowly relieving himself of the tight confines of his pants. The dull ache of his drooling member suddenly becomes too much, and his hand gathers up the precum, using it as lube.

His free hand wraps around his mouth in case anything slips from them. Ears focused on your sweet voice to spur him on, as a growing Shlick sound echos from the hallway.

The tip has become a pretty pink, as his palm speeds up. The friction only causing him to make the smallest sounds. It wasn’t enough, he needed you too. Only carefully and haphazardly pulling up his underwear along with his pants did he barge into the room, panting.

“Sorry, for startling you. But- Mhm, I can’t help myself anymore.” He spoke quickly. Walking up to the bed you were lying in, and pulling his shirt off. Not truly caring.

Your heart was beating quickly, mainly cause he scared the fuck out of you, but also because you were getting what you so desperately wanted.

His thighs were in between yours as the slightly wet hands glide up to your knees, leaving gentle kisses to your collarbone.

Mumbling,

“I wasn’t supposed to hear that, but I think deep down you wanted me too. Now let me make it up to you for eavesdropping, my dear.”

———————————————————————

I suck at writing smut or anything 18+

[eggedbellies]

Just want a pet tentacle who is constantly trying to breed me but it doesn't know it can't.  It knows it can drain my cock, it finds that as its nourishment when where on the go.  When it's in my ass keep feeling it pump,  lube me up, and when it cums in a vain attempt to breed me.  Sometimes I allow it to use my mouth and it may taste sour,  but god does it feel good. 

I try to leave it in its terrarium at night when not in use,  but it's been escaping somehow every night no matter how I stop it and use me as I sleep.  Waking up in my bed mixed with my cum and its cum,  good thing I got these waterproof sheets after the roof leak. 

It's been getting bigger every day,  it used to be the size of a small vibrator but now it's the size of a good-sized dildo.  Sometimes I take it out with me in public,  letting it use my ass,  something just feels right about it,  just wish it didn't cum at that worst times. 

But one day I awoke to it sucking my nipples,  and finding that I'm producing milk.  N-no big deal,  that's pretty easy to hide.  Ok, maybe the breast growth should be worrying.  But god does it feel so good. 

One night,  as I lay down,  trying to sleep,  it escapes,  but something different about it,  it's a once clear lube that has a hint of pink.  It keeps playing with my balls and dick tonight.  It feels hot,  like a good hot,  like being in a sauna.  I'm distracted by the pain to feel it reshaping me,  giving me my new hole,  and inserting itself in there to help reshape my new womb.  All night it spends in there,  I'm too distracted by the pleasure,  playing with my new tits and rubbing my new hole.  I can feel each change,  each pump from it.  I don't want it to end. 

The next morning I finally snap out of the pleasure and get to see my new body.  It's changed me,  changed me a lot,  but god I look hot.  It's still in there, I can feel it thrust and pump me over and over.

I can imagine after sotimemes it takes a rest and just stays in its terrarium,  as I feel my belly grow and grow,  until I lay eggs, its eggs.  A large clutch,  all mine. 

Maybe I should gift them to some friends, and let them join in the fun. 

Nobody wants to admit how good it feels to have their pet curling around and inside them, how fucking good it is when you're being packed and filled and fuck... how maybe it's pity but there's no denying there's something about being used by it that feels so very good

and then when you start to change, you pretend it's okay, because they can't get you pregnant right?

Right?

[fraterfalls]

Hi, I'm new to Blood Brothers AU and I was curious about it. Can you explain about it or show me where I can see the best explanation about it?

ohhh, dear asker, the rabbit hole i'm about to send you down... >:)

alright let me try and explain it in the most coherent way possible, it's late at night BUT i will try my best!!!

explanation under the cut!

(in general, if you're new to the bb au like this asker and trying to find your way around this overwhelming hell of an au i've concocted, i recommend you start here :D)

wow. i tried SO HARD to make this a semi-concise explanation and YET it somehow turned into a mini-fic in itself towards the end there. sighhh... (lol even still, have fun reading!)

first thing's first i need to tell you aboutttt

The Parallel World / "Better World".

in journal 3, ford mentions visiting a parallel dimension in which stan never pushed him into the portal, and instead took his journal and hid it as ford had requested.

^ some screenshots to give you the basic gist of what's going on in that dimension, everything you need to know for the time being. you can read more about it on internet archive if you like

at some point in august i reread this part of journal 3 and became obsessed with the idea of a parallel dimension. i also noticed that apart from mentioning how he never pushed ford into the portal and took the journal in this world, parallel stan is just... not really brought up. at all. ...which opens up some interesting possibilities.

as you can probably guess, this dimension features in the blood brothers au! in my interpretation, the reason stan was never mentioned is because after leaving with ford's journal, he never came back, just seemingly disappeared off the planet. parallel ford... has not been handling this well (and a certain bastard triangle only serves to play up his worst fears!), and because he has such a large student body to attend to and take care of and protect, he represses his issues, buries them under layers and layers of work and responsibilities. nobody even knows he has a brother...

not even his nephew and niece, dipper and mabel. however, they're observant as all hell. as secretive as ford is, they see past his little white lies, they see how he doesn't eat properly and falls asleep at his desk and laughs nervously when someone asks if he's alright. (i haven't talked much about the role they play in this au on tumblr, but rest assured i'll be elaborating more on it in my upcoming fic that may come out sometime within... um... the next few months to the next few decades. they're still the same old mystery twins we know and love, except now they've set their sights on figuring out what their grunkle ford is hiding. very Not What He Seems reminiscent)

alright, now that i've mostly covered the parallel world, time to move on to:

The Portal Stan AU

while i was obsessing over the Better World, a parallel dimension/"alternate universe" which already exists in canon, i started thinking about another AU which is fairly popular in the gravity falls fandom: the portal stan AU. in which stan, rather than ford, gets sent into the portal. thought it was a fantastic concept ever since i first saw it, because it opens so many doors for interesting characterization and also some good ol' angst (and later a healing arc, of course). portal stan has, after all, spent 40 or so years without a solid family base or anyone to care for him. and i can imagine that in those 30 years he spent dimension-hopping, his only thought was to return to his home dimension and see ford again. yes, he was furious and frustrated when they had that last argument, but surely in hindsight he saw how paranoid and jittery ford had been throughout their meeting. he would want to get back and make sure his brother was safe as soon as possible.

and then i had the thought which kicked off this entire au:

what if portal stan fucked up and somehow stumbled upon the parallel dimension while searching for a way home? what if portal stan and parallel ford... MET?

portal stan sees parallel ford and his situation and comes to the conclusion that, without him in the way, ford would flourish. parallel ford sees portal stan and comes to the conclusion that no matter the universe, he somehow manages to destroy stan's life just by being in it. even just knowing that the other exists exacerbates their own insecurities. IT'S SO AWFUL AND SO PERFECT.

also, portal stan couldn't be more desperate to get out of the parallel dimension- partly because he hates the reminder that ford would be better off without him, but mostly because he wants to see his real brother again. however, parallel ford has other plans for him. he's been in denial about the true fate of his own brother for a long time now, but he sees this version of stan and decides he can't afford to let go of him. (his own mental state is too fragile to accept the idea of losing stan again, even if this isn't his own stan. he already let go of him once after the WCT fiasco, and again after the journal incident. thrice is... thrice is too much.)

you may also be thinking "hey, smart guy, i actually DID read that screenshot you posted above while explaining the parallel dimension. it said parallel ford and fiddleford constructed a little something called a Vortex Neutralizer which allows for safe, bill-free multiversal travel. couldn't portal stan just use that to get out of there?"

yeaaah, parallel ford doesn't tell him about that!

he will do almost anything to keep stan with him. he is sinking his claws into that man begging him not to leave-

and stan hates him for it. tears into him with insult after insult. he can't stand this ford, why's he acting like he doesn't have everything he could ever want? (except, of course, he doesn't really hate him. after all, this is still stanford pines, maybe not his ford but he's certainly a ford. same old easily excitable nerd he used to tease back in high school. but stan still has his own ford to attend to, one who needs him more than anything... probably... hopefully, so he shuts out the part of him which is growing fond of parallel ford. tells himself not to think too much about this one. he hardly even knows him. he shouldn't have to bother.)

-

and yeah that's. i think that's enough information to take in in a single post. there's still plenty more going on with the au that i haven't touched on here, but hey that's just the premise! i would link you to more specific posts which will help you further acquaint yourself with the au, but it's. it's 2am and i am incredibly sleepy, so instead i will simply provide you with the link to the blog archive, where you can look at all the posts on here without having to scroll endlessly trying to find specific things. enjoy!!!

if you have any more questions DON'T BE AFRAID TO COME BOTHER ME ABOUT IT !!! i loved answering this ask... <3 been meaning to rewrite a better AU Premise Post than the one i made back in august anyway lol