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bepatientandpersistent · 2 years ago

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My constant thought these days is "life is weird". I don't even know how to elaborate on that. This is probably going to be a long rambling nonsensical post. You can read if you want, obviously that's why I put it on here, but I just learned how to put things under the "keep reading" cut. I know, I'm super late 😂 but I don't post on here like I'd like to.

I feel like I've just had so many feelings recently. Today one kind of surprised me because I thought "it's gonna be okay". Like, I tell myself that all the time, because life is a struggle and I need to remind myself to keep going and that things WILL in fact be okay. But today the thought occurred to me subconsciously without me having to force it. So, maybe things will actually be okay.

I've been really struggling financially for a couple months. Well, actually about 7 months, since my mom's income got suspended (she's on SSI). We finally got that resolved last month and it helps a ton, she can pay her own bills now. But my bills are behind because I was helping her AND I chose to go down to one day a week at the hotel. I have been doing door dash and spark deliveries for a few months and those options were pretty stable, but now they aren't as busy as they were. I spend many hours each week waiting for deliveries, and sometimes they just dont come. I've resorted to just leaving bills unpaid or overdrafting my bank account to pay them. When I do that, my bank charges me $36 per day that I'm overdrafted. It's a killer. I had to borrow a large sum of money from one of my good friends yesterday, and it just barely covered the overdraft I had.. I will be able to pay him back, and he's allowing me to pay in payments. Im so thankful for him.

I start my new big-girl hospital job on Monday! I'm excited but nervous. I can't believe it's finally here and happening. I take my NCLEX on the 10th. I haven't been studying like I should because all of every day has been spent doing and waiting for deliveries. My goal for today is to answer 100 review questions, maybe more of I can but AT LEAST 100. I have the resources to do it and today I have the time, I just need to make myself. I'm doing that after I post this.

I'll get my first paycheck and a $6500 sign-on bonus check on the 22nd. I just hope I can hold out on money until then. My commute to work will be ~40 minutes each way, and that takes gas. 5 days a week throughout June. After that I may go down to 3 days a week but that's to be determined.

My mom and I have been bickering about money and bills for weeks. We don't live together and our bills are technically separate but we help each other. If I have money and she needs something paid or needs something, I help her, and vice versa. Sometimes one of us will spend money on something unnecessary and it causes a rift. Because money is so tight right now. I don't feel like I should have to explain where every cent of my money goes, but I understand why she gets frustrated. We are broke. I am so ready for us to not have to share money and bills and to be able to do as I wish with the money I make. That's where my frustration comes in also: most of the money we have to spend is mine. I work 3 jobs right now, soon to be 4. If I want to spend the money I work my ass off for, I can do that. I just have to face the consequences of it sometimes..

I'm still living with my aunt and uncle and since my income will be much higher here soon, the thought of getting my own place has crossed my mind. My mom would like for us to live together. I'm not convinced that's a good idea. I'd love to have my own space and there are things I dislike about living with family. My dad may also potentially be moving here before the year is up. He probably wouldn't have a job immediately so he would either have to stay with my mom (in her living room) or with me in my own place. My mom complains about him constantly when he stays at her apartment. If like to avoid that if possible. I also don't enjoy the thought of having to move houses in the summer, that just sounds terrible. Plus, it would give me a few months to save up for deposits and moving costs.. no plans are set in stone yet, but moving this year is a definite possibility.

I've been trying to get back in the mindset of getting healthy and losing weight. I've stopped drinking sodas again (4 days ago) and am consequently drinking more water. However, I started smoking cigarettes again about 1.5 months ago and haven't kicked the habit yet. I am determined to make this pack the last and wait before I start work on Monday... I think I can do it. I haven't been any more active. My scale still says 266, which is 1 pound less than my high weight. At least it's not more right? I just know I'm going to be miserable working as a nurse being this overweight and out of shape. Part of me wants to try keto again because I know it will make me lose weight fast. But I can never keep up with it, I always quit right after it starts working. I'm still trying to decide what I want to do.. trying to decide what I think I can stick with.

I need to call my storage place and pay for my unit. I need to call and pay a loan. I need to go tomorrow to buy scrubs for work. I need to go study. I think I'll end this post there. I'm sorry if you've read this far 😅 I didn't know where I was going with it lol. I feel like I have lots more to say but I'll continue later.

#personal #life #work #update

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jjkfire · 4 years ago

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>:0 tumblr fjdjjsndissk i was just saying wowowow i’m amazed how on top of being a fic writer u also work with data in a i assume money related field? like your writing and ideas are so fleshed out !!!! it’s so good !! i’m an engineer and i’ve occasionally thought abt starting writing myself but i don’t ever feel like i’ll have the time to come up with such fleshed out stories but like you are writing goals girl!!! keep up the great work bby

STEM fam, I know what you mean about not having the time hahaha. to be very honest, I only wrote in college when I was trying to procrastinate. I'd be like should I write my lab report or write a fic? and I would choose to write a fic and later on panic and try to finish my lab report... but by then i would only have like 1/5th of the time I originally budgeted hahahaha.

about being able to write stories, that comes with practice! you just have to start 😊 maybe your first story won't be the best but we all start somewhere!!! i mean, i think you can defo see the progress in my writing from courage -> escape -> to all my other fics. the beauty of writing is that 100 words can move you just as much as 10000 words. so, just start! when you start, you’re doing better than all the other people who are too afraid to do so. you’ll already be one step closer. also, askjdhskjahdkja thank you for all the kind words (”: you’re so sweet!

haha i don't work in the finance world but I defo love to invest/trade in the stock market lol. if any of you are American... you do not understand how lucky you are. legit can become a millionaire overnight bc of tesla 🙃 but i digress! there’s so much opportunity in the stock market!!!

>>> incoming finance ramble <<<

first of all, I cannot stress this enough. you should try to learn the basics of investing & trading and there are like a bazillion youtube videos at your disposal! you can make good money and safely too! it's a skill you can use for the rest of your life. like genuinely. so, number one on the list, you have to get a long term portfolio. the average annual return of the S&P500 is 7%. idk what your bank is giving you but i sure as hell can bet it’s not even remotely close to 7%. buying etfs like VOO are very typical set it and forget it type things. [look up bogleheads 3 fund portfolio! it’s a very famous investing strategy].

year to date, famous stocks are up by a lot. microsoft is up ~54%, apple is up~93% and you don’t even wanna know what the number is for tesla....... nvm i’ll tell you... it’s up ~542%, yes, five hundred and forty two percent. no, that isn’t a typo. and this is all even after they all went through the wringer back in the march covid crash.

you can google this stuff, but 100% your money will grow more in the stock market vs the bank, as long as you don’t panic (very important!) and you leave it for 20-30 years, and invest diligently (& intelligently). not to mention, you get dividends too. [but only put into the stock market what is rational for your situation. if you’re genuinely living paycheck to paycheck, don’t do it. get your 6 month emergency savings first.]

yeah and i hear you, you’re like 20-30 years? i want money now!!! good news, there’s options trading! tons of people think it takes a lot of money but two weeks ago you could've legitimately bought Wal-Mart calls for $14 a pop and then sell em 6 days later for $211. that's $197 profit for the cost of $14. patience is the game!!! don’t let fomo get you. and dont be stewpid. do your due diligence! it’s just so worth spending a few hours on youtube learning this stuff for FREE and then making money out of it... i mean are you ever gonna get a better deal????

i know this sounds like some mlm type shit and i literally don’t know how else to say this but if you take the time to learn it properly, you will defo make money. i made money doing debit spreads on nvidia and beyond meat just last week. not like thousands and thousands but hey, if there’s an extra 50 for me every week, i’ll take it! if you’re not american, find out if your local stock market is worth getting into. i have money in the stock market back home too. bro youtube has the answers for everything, i swear. [oh and watch out for capital gains tax! make sure you report it right!]

also, i’m a big believer in personal finance. just know your shit. do cash back/points with credit cards. NEVER be late in paying your credit card bill. NEVER! the interest on late payments will haunt you. look at your budget every month. and yes, if you really wanna know where your money goes, record every single transaction in a giant excel spreadsheet. i do it every end of the month. you’ll realize where you can cut back on spending (i save >50% of my income every month! and i live in a high COL (cost of living) city. so, it’s doable!) also, start thinking about retirement. i know, you’re (probably) young... but start thinking about it and do something about it! the earlier you start, the more bougie your life can be when you’re retired. if you’re american, take the 401k match. just. TAKE IT!!! it’s free money. if retirement plans work differently in your country (it probably does)... just do what is necessary. in malaysia, it’s automatic but the interest is so good! y’all just have to know that it’s for your future. oh and if you’ve got debts, pay off the high interest ones first no matter what. that shit will suck you dry.

personal finance. learn it. love it. don’t let the system play you. there’s money to be made in the stock market, especially now! there isn’t a better time to start learning. you can always paper trade before you put real money in. hehe sorry about the personal finance lecture but i just wished more people would get into it!!! older you will thank younger you for it!

#learn how to handle your finances early!!!#start investing early :3 #anon #replies #misc

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theworldaccordingtodee · 5 years ago

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Story Time: It’s My Body (Women’s Health)

So some of my followers may remember back in 2015 when I posted about having to have surgery to remove those pesky uterine fibroids. If you don’t remember, here’s a quick recap:

•I got diagnosed with fibroids in 2014

•Fibroids are these nasty lil tumors that can grow in and on the uterus

•All women have them, but a small percentage of cases fibroids can grow abnormally large

•The options are surgery and hormone therapy

So because mine were painstakingly large and were pressing up on some major organs, I had to have surgery. Luckily, I was still covered under my parents HMO because I nor my parents had $10k to shell out.

A few weeks ago I started having the same symptoms as before, turns out I’ve got FOUR fibroids the size of golf balls growing in the muscle of my uterus. Last time I had a few small ones and one the size of a grapefruit. I’ll spare y’all the details of how messed up my lady parts were...let’s just say, I was one sad soul.

The only sure fire solution to make sure they don’t grow back is to have your uterus removed. I’ve thought about it over the years, like really, really thought about it. I mean, I love kids, I want kids, but I’m not selfish enough to keep my uterus and jeopardize any future child’s life or health or end up being infertle altogether. Mind you, I live in the DEEP south where everyone is religious, I am too, but I don’t think Jesus would be mad if I made a smart, ethical decision...I also don’t think he’d want me suffering in pain like I’ve been doing either. I mean, some days I can barely get out of bed, I can’t drive, can’t go to work (my job is straight commission based so if I don’t work, I don’t get paid).

My doctor and I talked last time and we agreed that if the fibroids got out of hand again, I’d have a hysterectomy, which I was okay with. I mean sure, it would’ve sucked not to be able to have my own kids but I can adopt, I can try freezing my eggs, use a surrogate. There’s more than one way to be a parent.

There’s just one tiny problem with this whole situation: where I live, you can’t even get your tubes tied if you’re not at least, I think the minimum age is like 21/25 and had at least two kids.

I’m 28 and have never had kids.

I went back to see my doctor Wednesday (after two weeks of feeling like I’m dying) and we talked about my options. We both agreed that it would be a waste to have to do surgery every few years when they’ll just keep coming back, I could take a round of lupron, but after taking it six months to a year could potentially send me into menopause, which...no thank you! Then, there was birth control. My periods have always sucked; I got put on birth control pills in like sixth or seventh grade and stayed on it until high school but got back on it at like 21/22. It didn’t work for me it just, didn’t. My periods are just plain old whack. But anywho, my doctor and I talked and I decided I’d try an IUD. I go for the insertion Thursday. Thankfully, my insurance covered the procedure 100%, thanks Obamacare. I chose the IUD for several reasons:

1. I still wanna have kids someday

2. I didn’t want to do a round of lupron and risk going into early menopause

3. I wasn’t sure if my Obamacare would be as generous as my parents insurance and cover the entire cost

4. As much as I’ve joked about “throwing my damn uterus across a wall” and how childbirth is gross and disgusting, getting rid of my uterus was a pretty big decision I wasn’t sure I was ready for. Thankfully, my doctor didn’t push that option, she let me know it was on the table if I wanted it and that studies show that women who have their tubes tied or a hysterectomy after age 27 are 65 percent less likely to have regret. She gave me choices and options and listened to me and my concerns.

The biggest reason I chose not to have a hysterectomy is because well, I wasn’t sure if I could even have the procedure done, especially with Alabama having some of the strictest restrictions on women’s health. I feel like while I personally wouldn’t have an abortion, I think women should have the right to do what they think is best for their body. What if I was one hundred percent sure I didn’t want kids? My state cares more about my ability to carry children I may not even have more than my quality of life. If I’m curled up in bed, unable to drive and unable to work every couple of years because my fibroids keep coming back, who’s gonna take care of these hypothetical kids? What good am I to a child or to society if I can’t take care of myself? What kind of parent would I be if I got pregnant and my fibroids came back? I’d be putting a child at risk of dying in utero or being born prematurely. That’s not what a parent does; to me, that’s selfish AF and while I’m still on the fence about kids, I would NEVER want to harm a child for my own selfish needs.

So here I am, still in pain, having to spend money I don’t really have for tramadol and this medication I have to take before my IUD insertion. I’ve been to work once since the Monday BEFORE Labor Day-again, I work a straight commission job, which means I haven’t had a paycheck in WEEKS. I shouldn’t have to live like this because genetically I as a Black woman am at a higher risk for fibroids on top of the fact that I started my period young and because my mother had fibroids too. But most of all, I shouldn’t have to worry about whether or not my state will allow me to have a procedure to improve my quality of life, all because I haven’t had two kids yet.

Anywho, that’s my story; it’s been in my heart to share it with you guys for a couple of days now. And to any woman living with this type of pain or any other problem similar to this, I see you, I hear you, and you’re not alone sis.

#women's health #Reproductive rights #storytime #personal

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btsybrkr · 5 years ago

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Please Come Dine With Me

In today’s world of Netflix originals, glossy reality series and big budget drama, it’s easy to forget about TV’s old reliables. You know, the programmes with nothing to say, but so much to give. They’re the television equivalent of an ex that you can’t help but miss, despite having brought absolutely nothing to each other’s lives. The absolute king of this brand of TV can only be Come Dine With Me, the dinner party contest that began broadcasting in 1892 and has been playing simultaneously, on all 26 branches of Channel 4, at every hour of every day ever since. Seriously, flick through the channels, I can almost guarantee it’s on right now.

Come Dine With Me, now in its 37th series (I’m actually not making that bit up), must unironically be one of the best things to ever air in this country. During a casual viewing, it seems that nothing much happens, but a quick Google search unearths an absolute goldmine of unforgettable moments. Some have already been cemented into pop culture history, destined to be repeated on ‘100 Greatest...’ clip shows until the sun swallows the Earth whole - like the man who decided to sample a sauce he was making by nonchalantly shoving the whole whisk into his mouth, or sore loser Peter Marsh’s ‘you won, Jane’ speech, which is, in my opinion, a hundred times more brutal than anything Ricky Gervais could or would ever come out with whilst presenting an awards ceremony. Others are unfortunately never spoken about, but remain a vivid memory in the consciousness of the lucky viewers who caught them, such as the moment a particularly eccentric contestant, known only as DJ Dom, drafted in indie musician Badly Drawn Boy to help him cook for his ‘Madchester’ themed dinner party, before telling the viewers “All done, just got to go and change me kecks!” and coming back downstairs in the exact same outfit, right down to the bucket hat. Or the iconic Preston week from series 7, in which we were introduced to so-posh-it-hurts Valerie Holliday, whose pronunciation of the word ‘pheasant’ (or fezzaaaunt, as she might say) is superglued to the insides of my brain, where it will stay for the rest of my days. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I’m sure we’ve all, at some point, had the ‘who would be invited to your dream dinner party?’ conversation with our friends or family, but what we should really be asking each other is “who would be on your dream episode of Come Dine With Me?”. If you think about it, they’re two very different questions, with very different answers. Of course, I’d love the chance to sit and speak with Tom Hanks, Mac Demarco and Phoebe Waller-Bridge over a glass of wine and a really good burger, but do I think it would make entertaining TV? Well, yeah, probably. But not on Come Dine With Me. That’s a horse of a very different colour.

Anyway, here’s what my dream episode of Come Dine With Me might look like. Narrated in your brain by Dave Lamb, probably.

Today, we’re in Blackpool, where our first contestant, 23-year-old chronic timewaster Betsy (that’s me!), is gearing up to host the opening night of the week, and we’re sure it’s going to be an absolute belter. Let’s see what her fellow dinner party guests make of the menu.

“A cheeseboard? As a starter? What’s that about?”, asks living soundbite and reality TV icon, Gemma Collins. She’s unimpressed with the menu, largely on the basis that it pales in comparison to the sort of luxury she’s used to, such as the gourmet camel penis she could have been tucking into on I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here! In 2014, had she not packed it in after three days. Actually, I think the celebrity version of Come Dine With Me might be the only reality programme that Gemma Collins is yet to appear in. Maybe we should be writing to the powers-that-be at Channel 4 and getting them to sort that out, since I’ll surely be making a strong case for her appearance here. Anyway, who’s next?

Our third contestant is equally disappointed with the offerings. “I don’t fuck with stilton”, states the self-proclaimed second coming of Jesus, Kanye West. Yes, he’s an odd choice for a daytime cookery/popularity contest, especially since I’m almost 100% sure he doesn’t cook for himself under any circumstances, and is probably only popular among people who’ve never had to try and sit through an actual conversation with him, but who cares? Kanye does what Kanye wants. And if Kanye wants to appear on Come Dine With Me, then that’s his business, and he’ll shit in the Yeezys of anybody who disagrees. Or pay someone else to do it for him, obviously. Anyway, onto contestant number four, who can surely only be disappointing after that… can’t they?

Of course not!! Contestant number four is TV’s shouty queen-of-clean Kim Woodburn, who is really excited to get her teeth into some red hot beef. Not the food kind, either. The kind of beef she dished out to Philip Schofield, while he was asking her questions about the beef she dished out in her fondly-remembered ‘chicken-livered bunch’ rant from Celebrity Big Brother. She’ll be glad to know I’m not serving any chicken livers at my dinner party, I’m sure. Not that she’ll be particularly enamoured with my cooking skills overall.

“It all looks terribly common, darling”, she says, as she holds the menu in one Marigold-wearing hand, and a glass of an expensive gin in the other. Suit yourself, then, Kim.

Contestant number five hasn’t bothered to read the menu yet, but that’s because he’s been busy begging the Channel 4 producers on set for another series of Deal Or No Deal now that his hefty I’m A Celebrity paycheck is all but gone. Yes, it’s Noel Edmonds, TV’s favourite bearded arsehole. After Alan Sugar, of course, but I’ve already written a bit about him on here, so there’d be no point in putting him in this one as well. You know, someone I knew a few years back once told me that Noel Edmonds did a guest lecture at his university, in which he offered some lucky students the chance to spend their summer doing a couple of months unpaid work experience on his radio show. Imagine that! Spending day-in-day-out with Noel Edmonds, without even a penny in compensation. I know they say ‘life’s not fair’, but that really would be pushing it.

Anyway, that’s everyone, and as I anxiously pour boiling water into five chicken and mushroom Pot Noodles, my all-star dinner guests begin to arrive. First at the doorstep is Kim, who I greet with open arms.

“Wonderful to meet you, luvvie”, she says. The worried glance she gives the camera afterwards tells me otherwise. Perhaps she’s unimpressed by my unshiny door handle. That’s not a euphemism.

Gemma and Noel arrive soon afterwards, both carrying bottles of champagne that I couldn’t possibly ever afford myself. They’re not to share, of course, they were bought in anticipation that the wine I’m providing wouldn’t be up to standard, which it is, because I’m serving all my courses with a glass of Summer Berries Echo Falls. It’s £5.99 a bottle and gets you absolutely Bankered.

We mingle in the living room, eagerly anticipating the arrival of my final guest. Just as Gemma, Kim and Noel begin bonding over the trials of being paid many thousands of pounds to sit around and simply exist for the viewing pleasures of mere mortals like myself, Kanye West teleports himself into the room, in a futuristic flash of lightning and to the tune of his 2010 hit Power, blowing a massive hole into the entire left side of my house in the process. It’s true what he says, you know - the man really is a genius.

We take our seats at the dinner table, as soon as the rest of my guests are done with the obligatory search through my knicker drawer (cue a comeback for Kim’s famous How Clean Is Your House? catchphrase, “Oh, you dirty devil!”) that happens on every edition of Come Dine With Me. You know, despite everything else on the programme, that’s the one bit of it that I’ve never really understood. Every single one of the show’s 1,647 episodes includes a bizarre sequence in which the contestants go running around the host’s home, rifling through their personal belongings and mocking them for the cameras. I’m sure the point of it is supposed to be to give the guests a chance to ‘get to know’ the host, but then I’d have thought that spending five nights eating and chatting with them would be a fairly effective way of doing that. Besides, can you imagine catching your guests doing that in real life? I wouldn’t be sitting them down for a meal and rating them for a chance to win £1,000, I’d be throwing them out, maybe even calling the police, depending on what exactly they were doing with the belongings in question. Not that I have time to think about that right now, I’ve got a cheeseboard to prepare!

First topic of conversation is, of course, TV, and as we tuck into our Ritz biscuits and Tesco Value mature cheddar, Noel gives us his opinion.

“My main issue with television these days is that I’m just not on it enough.” A valid viewpoint. We take a moment to collectively long for the days of Noel’s HQ, a drunken nightmare that was somehow harnessed and broadcast to the masses by Sky1, way back in 2008. Noel’s HQ has been mostly lost to time, except for the presence of a video on YouTube entitled ‘Noel Edmonds speaks with passion’, which is well worth a watch if, like me, you enjoy four minute long videos of TV presenters struggling to stifle their own belief that they might just be The Best Person Ever. There’s a great bit in it where he angrily declares to his delighted audience, “I don’t get paid a penny for doing this show”. Noel, I think I speak for everyone when I say thank you for your sacrifice.

Speaking of The Best Person Ever, Kanye is noticeably quiet. But then, Kanye isn’t here to share his views. Kanye isn’t particularly here to do anything. Kanye is simply here to observe - to greet his subjects, and work out what makes them tick. Kanye can sense our excitement to be sat in his presence, and Kanye enjoys this. It feeds Kanye. Far more than my meager dinner offerings ever could.

I press Gemma for her own opinions on TV, as someone who is literally always on it. Gemma Collins gets where Domestos can’t. It may sound like I’m being flippant, but in all honesty, I love Gemma Collins. I’m not even sure why, I just know I do. She’s famous for the sake of being famous, and she’s bloody good at it. She’s also quite possibly the most quotable public figure since Shakespeare himself. Maybe even more than Shakespeare. Think about it. What inspires you more? “To be or not to be?”, like anyone knows what that actually means, or “Nah, fuck this, I’m out of here. Get that fire exit door. Am off.”, a poetic sentiment, which conveys an emotion we’ve surely all felt at some point in our lives? I know who gets my vote.

Kim misunderstands the question “what do you think of television today?” as “how clean do you think my television is?”, and responds by pulling out a five pack of dusters and a can of Mr Sheen, and getting to work on the flatscreen in the corner of my living room. Oh well, at least all that cleaning will make her hungry in time for the main course. Speaking of which, maybe it’s time I got on with that.

Despite their disappointment with the starters, the main course - Super Noodle sandwiches, with a generous side-helping of curly fries - appears to delight all my guests, except Kim, who mutters under her breath that it all seems very tacky. I won’t let it get me down. It’s my heartfelt belief that anything can be a sandwich filling if you’re brave enough, and my other three guests agree with me. Kanye lets out a satisfied ‘hm’. Excellent.

We sit down to dessert, and another glass of Echo Falls. The wine is going down surprisingly well, especially with Kim, who has started subtly rolling her eyes at the conversation between myself and Gemma Collins, who are bonding over how much we love Gemma Collins. Kim purses her lips. Her Spidey-senses are tingling. There’s conflict afoot.

I quiz Noel about an article that I saw in 2015 and have never forgotten. It was featured on The Independent, and was headlined ‘Noel Edmonds says that ‘death doesn’t exist’ and that ‘Electrosmog’ is more deadly than Ebola’. I know that this sounds like something I just came up with, but I regret to tell you that is absolutely something he said. In real life. I’ll give you a minute to take that in.

Noel Edmonds reaffirms this view to me, speaking with the same unnerving passion he did in the YouTube clip I mentioned earlier. I nod politely. I begin to wonder if everyone’s had a little too much Echo Falls, and if I can really handle another four nights with these people. It’s at this moment that, for the first time all night, His Almighty Westness speaks.

“I really feel what you’re saying right now”, he tells Noel. We wait together for the next part of the statement, but it never comes. Kanye West outstretches his arm to Noel Edmonds. They shake hands. None of us can quite believe it. And for a moment, Noel and Kanye are right. It does feel as though death doesn’t exist. Nothing exists outside of this dinner party. Everything that matters is happening around my dining table at this very second.

The silence is broken by Kim Woodburn tutting into a wine glass.

“Oh, for Heaven’s sake,” she drawls, rolling her eyes, “What a load of nonsensical tosh.”

“Excuse me?”, asks Noel, still hand-in-hand with Kanye West, an alliance he is clearly eager to keep going for as long as possible, on the off chance that he fancies funding another series of Noel’s House Party, “I don’t see you bringing anything to the table here, Kim.”

She widens her eyes, taking another generous gulp of Echo Falls - and I know exactly what she’s about to bring to the table. A big old fight.

Gemma Collins throws in her two cents.

“I think we should all calm down a little bit, d’ya know what I mean? I’m having a lovely meal at a fan’s house, I can’t be arsed with an argument.” Wise words, as always, Gemma. Wise words.

It all kicks off.

“You can be quiet, you talentless, orange foghorn!”, sneers Kim, “You’ve contributed nothing to the conversation this evening, other than talking about yourself.”

Gemma’s eyes seem to cloud over with anger, as her complexion quickly transitions from Dulux shade Tangerine Twist to Cranberry Crunch. She knocks the rest of her wine back. Everything goes quiet again for a moment, as Noel, Kanye and I watch the two TV divas stare at each other. It’s like a scene from an old Western, but with diamonds and veneers.

With a violent roar, she launches herself across the table, grabbing Kim by her fake ponytail. I jump up to hold her back, as Kanye leaps from his seat to hold Kim from Gemma. There’s a mad blur of acrylic nails and tufts of bleach blonde hair flying between them, some of it landing into the banoffee pie I had worked so hard on. Noel stands back, arms folded, watching the action in dismay. If you could see the whole picture, it might resemble a renaissance painting, the sort that could be hung in a gallery anywhere in the world and analysed for it’s artistic importance. ‘Nous aimons le boeuf’, it might be called. French for ‘we love the beef’. Doesn’t really matter it means, though, to be fair, as long as it sounds clever and artsy.

Noel shakes his head.

“What the hell am I doing here?”, he asks, frustrated, “I’m a huge TV star.”

Security eventually intervene, somewhat reluctantly, given the fact this is the most action they’ve seen on a shoot for Come Dine With Me, possibly ever. Producers watch back the footage of the fight on an iPad, sat on my sofa, attempting to mask their delight at what they’d caught on camera.

Kanye eventually stands up, soberly taking in the scene in front of him. Is this how Jay-Z felt as he left the elavator?, he wonders.

“I’m gonna take off”, he informs everyone, breaking the silence that had fallen over the room in the aftermath. But before he can teleport out of the room again, possibly blowing a hole in the other side of my house, the producer speaks up.

“Same time tomorrow? It’s Gemma’s night.”

Four more nights of this… four more nights, all for the chance to win £1,000… is it worth it?

Of course it is. It was a blast. Same time tomorrow, indeed.

To see some highlights from the iconic Preston week of Come Dine With Me, click here. To see Noel Edmonds speak with passion, click here. To follow me on twitter, click here, or here for instagram :)

#come dine with me #celebrity big brother #big brother #gemma collins #i’m a celebrity #comedy #tv review #reality tv #blogger #ukblogger #comedy writing

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fit-as-fxck · 6 years ago

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wolves

“Like all little girls, I was taught to be grateful. I was taught to keep my head down, stay on the path, and get my job done. I was freaking Little Red Riding Hood. You know the fairy tale: It’s just one iteration of the warning stories girls are told the world over. Little Red Riding Hood heads off through the woods and is given strict instructions: Stay on the path. Don’t talk to anybody. Keep your head down hidden underneath your Handmaid’s Tale cape. And she does… at first. But then she dares to get a little curious and she ventures off the path. That’s of course when she encounters the Big Bad Wolf and all hell breaks loose. The message is clear: Don’t be curious, don’t make trouble, don’t say too much or BAD THINGS WILL HAPPEN. I stayed on the path out of fear, not of being eaten by a wolf, but of being cut, being benched, losing my paycheck.

If I could go back and tell my younger self one thing it would be this: “Abby, you were never Little Red Riding Hood; you were always the wolf.” In 1995 wolves were re-introduced into Yellowstone National Park after being absent for seventy years. In those years, the number of deer had skyrocketed because they were unchallenged, alone at the top of the food chain. They grazed away and reduced the vegetation, so much that the river banks were eroding. Once the wolves arrived, they thinned out the deer through hunting. But more significantly, their presence changed the behavior of the deer. Wisely, the deer started avoiding the valleys, and the vegetation in those places regenerated. Trees quintupled in just six years. Birds and beavers started moving in. The river dams the beavers built provided habitats for otters and ducks and fish. The animal ecosystem regenerated. But that wasn’t all. The rivers actually changed as well. The plant regeneration stabilized the river banks so they stopped collapsing. The rivers steadied—all because of the wolves’ presence.

See what happened here? The wolves, who were feared as a threat to the system, turned out to be its salvation. Are you picking up what I’m laying down here? Women are feared as a threat to our system—and we will also be our society’s salvation. Our landscape is overrun with archaic ways of thinking about women, about people of color, about the “other,” about the rich and the poor, about the the powerful and the powerless—and these ways of thinking are destroying us. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.

We will not Little Red Riding Hood our way through life. We will unite our pack, storm the valley together and change the whole bloody system.”

“Rule One: MAKE FAILURE YOUR FUEL - Here’s something the best athletes understand, but seems like a hard concept for non-athletes to grasp. Non-athletes don’t know what to do with the gift of failure. So they hide it, pretend it never happened, reject it outright—and they end up wasting it. Listen: Failure is not something to be ashamed of, it's something to be POWERED by. Failure is the highest octane fuel your life can run on. You gotta learn to make failure your fuel. When I was on the Youth National Team, only dreaming of playing alongside Mia Hamm, I had the opportunity to visit the National Team’s locker room. The thing that struck me most wasn’t my heroes' grass-stained cleats or their names and numbers hanging above their lockers—it was a picture. It was a picture that someone had taped next to the door so that It would be the last thing every player saw before she headed out to the training pitch. You might guess it was a picture of their last big win, of them standing on a podium accepting gold medals—but it wasn’t. It was a picture of their longtime rival—the Norwegian national team—celebrating after having just beaten the USA in the 1995 World Cup.

In that locker room, I learned that in order to become my very best—on the pitch and off—I’d need to spend my life letting the feelings and lessons of failure transform into my power. Failure is fuel. Fuel is power. Women, listen to me. We must embrace failure as our fuel instead of accepting it as our destruction.

Wolf Pack: Fail up. Blow it, and win.

Rule Two: LEAD FROM THE BENCH - Imagine this: You’ve scored more goals than any human being on the planet—female or male. You’ve co-captained and led Team USA in almost every category for the past decade. And you and your coach sit down and decide together that you won’t be a starter in your last World Cup for Team USA. So… that sucked. You’ll feel benched sometimes, too. You’ll be passed over for the promotion, taken off the project—you might even find yourself holding a baby instead of a briefcase—watching your colleagues “get ahead.” Here’s what’s important. You are allowed to be disappointed when it feels like life’s benched you. What you aren’t allowed to do is miss your opportunity to lead from the bench. During that last World Cup, my teammates told me that my presence, my support, my vocal and relentless belief in them from the bench is what gave them the confidence they needed to win us that championship. If you’re not a leader on the bench, don’t call yourself a leader on the field. You’re either a leader everywhere or nowhere. And by the way: the fiercest leading I’ve ever seen has been done between mother and child. Parenting is no bench. It just might be the big game.

Wolf Pack: Wherever you’re put, lead from there.

Rule Three: CHAMPION EACH OTHER - During every 90-minute soccer match there are a few magical moments when the ball actually hits the back of the net and a goal is scored. When this happens, it means that everything has come together perfectly—the perfect pass, the perfectly timed run, every player in the right place at exactly the right time: all of this culminating in a moment in which one player scores that goal. What happens next on the field is what transforms a bunch of individual women into a team. Teammates from all over the field rush toward the goal scorer. It appears that we’re celebrating her: but what we’re REALLY celebrating is every player, every coach, every practice, every sprint, every doubt, and every failure that this one single goal represents. You will not always be the goal scorer. And when you are not—you better be rushing toward her. Women must champion each other. This can be difficult for us. Women have been pitted against each other since the beginning of time for that one seat at the table. Scarcity has been planted inside of us and among us. This scarcity is not our fault. But it is our problem. And it is within our power to create abundance for women where scarcity used to live. As you go out into the world: Amplify each others’ voices. Demand seats for women, people of color and all marginalized people at every table where decisions are made. Call out each other’s wins and just like we do on the field: claim the success of one woman, as a collective success for all women. Joy. Success. Power. These are not pies where a bigger slice for her means a smaller slice for you. These are infinite. In any revolution, the way to make something true starts with believing it is. Let’s claim infinite joy, success, and power—together.

Wolf Pack: Her Victory is your Victory. Celebrate it.

Rule Four: DEMAND THE BALL - When I was a teenager, I was lucky enough to play with one of my heroes, Michelle Akers. Michelle was tall like I am, built like I’d be built, and the most courageous soccer player I’d ever seen play. She personified every one of my dreams. We were playing a small sided scrimmage—5 against 5. We were eighteen-year-olds and she was—Michelle Akers—a chiseled, thirty-year-old powerhouse. For the first three quarters of the game, she was taking it easy on us, coaching us, teaching us about spacing, timing and the tactics of the game. By the fourth quarter, she realized that because of all of this coaching, her team was losing by three goals. In that moment, a light switched on inside of her.

She ran back to her own goalkeeper, stood one yard away from her, and screamed: GIVE. ME. THE. FUCKING. BALL. And the goalkeeper gave her the effing ball. And she took that ball and she dribbled through our entire effing team and she scored. Now this game was winner’s keepers, so if you scored you got the ball back. So, as soon as Michelle scored, she ran back to her goalie, stood a yard away from her and screamed: GIVE ME THE BALL. Michelle Akers knew what her team needed from her at every moment of that game. Don't forget that until the fourth quarter, leadership had required Michelle to help, support, and teach, but eventually leadership called her to demand the ball. Women. At this moment in history leadership is calling us to say: GIVE ME THE FUCKING BALL.

In closing, I want to leave you with the most important thing I’ve learned since leaving soccer. I defined myself as Abby Wambach, soccer player—the one who showed up and gave 100 percent to my team and fought alongside my wolf pack to make a better future for the next generation. Without soccer who would I be? I’m still the same Abby. I still show up and give 100 percent—now to my new pack—and I still fight every day to make a better future for the next generation. You see, soccer didn’t make me who I was. I brought who I was to soccer, and I get to bring who I am wherever I go. And guess what? So do you.

As you leave here today and everyday going forward: Don’t just ask yourself, “What do I want to do?” Ask yourself: “WHO do I want to be?” Because the most important thing I've learned is that what you do will never define you. Who you are always will.

And who you are, are the wolves.” - Abby Wambach, 2018 commencement speech at Barnard

#excerpt from Abby Wambach speech to Barnard College #so fucking inspiring #you are wolves #and on that note #I'm sorry this is so long #but it's so good #and into the woods I go

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storytimew-kam · 6 years ago

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There’s always money in the banana stand.

June 4, 2019. I woke up with $95 of liquid funds in my account and $650 rent to pay. My boyfriend offered to lend me cash. That, friends, was a new low

Two days earlier I had received a paycheck for $990 for two weeks of work.

Within 3 days of automatic bill payments, $300 having been sent to another bank account as my “variable expenses allowance” until my next paycheck from *that* job, and I’m sunk.

June 5, 2019. The last day to pay my rent before I incur a late fee, and I wake up to $1100 in that same account and my $300 allowance cleared.

How’d that happen?

1. I scrounged my apartment for cash I periodically squirrel away from my restaurant gig for these emergencies.

2. I got 2 months of utilities payment from my roomie (who I consistently forget to bill on time)

That got me to $595. $55 short for my rent payment with $300 floating in space between my big bank bank and my online bank that’s supposed to make my variable spending life more Simple.

Then, miraculously this morning, my freelancing gig that often doesn’t pay me until the 8th or 9th of the month (although they claim it will be sooner) and a client payment cleared.

Even while writing this post I get another Venmo of $100 from a client!

So now, I can pay my rent on time without borrowing from my parents, my boyfriend, or whomever else in my life I might bring myself to ask for help, thus creating a shame-spiral of questioning my life-choices.

I looked at my man and said “I just want there to be a steady amount in my account so I’m not giving myself grey hairs over paying my goddamn bills on time! I thought this process of trying to organize my shit was going to mean ending the panic attacks!”

Freelancers- ya feel me?

Hustlers- ya feel me?

Shift workers- ya feel me?

Welcome to “The Banana Stand Blog,” with me, Your Fellow Freelancer.

Who am I to talk to you about money? Good question.

I’ve lived a few lives based in freelancing and shift work in the last 17 years. I’m 32 now, and getting my financial shite together. I’m committed to it 200% because I believe it’s the biggest thing holding me back from my deepest desire: freedom.

I’ve read all the books, listened to the podcasts, read the blogs, gone to free financial coaching, gone to expensive financial coaching, gone to mid-range financial coaching.....and I still continue to consume ALL THE INFORMATION I CAN GET MY HANDS ON.

But here’s what I’ve discovered: the financial advice out there is standardized to favor people in a more traditional work environment.

It doesn’t tell you how to take the $300 of tips you just walked out the door with and use it right, nor does it tell you how to organize gig-work when you’ve got money randomly coming in throughout the month.

It doesn’t tell you how you can get ahead without seeming to need 8 hours of time -per week- to budget down to every 👏🏻 last 👏🏻 penny 👏🏻

(I’m guessing if you’re still reading this post, you ain’t got time for that shite either).

And I’m frustrated. I don’t fit the trad, never have, and I have no desire to work a corporate 9-5 job (although I have applied for them, in desperation for change).

So if you’re like me and you’ve got all the side hustles in the land, but you want to get out of leading that paycheck-to-paycheck life, lets do it together.

I’m not perfect, and you don’t need to be either. If this blog helps just one person out there feel less alone, I’ve done my job. Because I’ve felt very alone for a very long time here, and that has truly sucked.

You ain’t alone fellow freelancer / shift worker / they of many gigs. I promise 🤘🏼

-Your Fellow Freelancer

#money #money in the bank #freelancer #freelance #hustle #hustlersambition #hustler #shiftlife #money management #money making #business #entrepreneur #entrepreurship #self employed #self love #inspiration #real talk #arrested development #tina fey

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dzpenumbra · 2 years ago

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I'm censoring my thoughts again, I've noticed. It's been a while. I was going to write about something else but I deleted it from my own journal. It's pretty raw, unresolved stuff from the past two days, so it makes sense. I just don't like hiding things from view, it defeats the point of all this.

Having my parents pay my rent while I try to pursue a failing art/writing/streaming career is just really embarassing to type out. I didn't mind it in college, but that was many moons ago. It has fucked up a lot of my self esteem, my confidence, you name it. I feel like I'm clinging on to a pipe dream, a fantasy - which I happen to have a worthless BA in. That I'm clearly not talented enough to be successful, this career just isn't happening, I just haven't caught on yet. I fear that one day they're just gonna get sick of this and cut it off, and that will be the day I kiss my creativity goodbye. My soul goodbye. It's happened before, when I got into my first live-in relationship and I took it SUPER serious. I made getting my shit straight a full-time job, and creativity just disappeared. It almost killed me, it took a physical toll on my body, not to mention how much it fucked up my identity, my sense of self, my picture of who I even am. I don't ever want to go back to that, let alone of my own choosing.

I keep trying to communicate this version of myself that I'm trying to preserve and enhance to my Mom, the way I did with other people in support roles. I display full work days working on multiple pieces in multiple mediums. I show a project list with 10 big projects on it. I show streaming to have a social/publicity element. I show putting one of the several book ideas I've had into a finished product and getting it on shelves. I show this detailed image of the life I hope to live, that I'm already living minus the customers. Their reaction is to tell me to just get a job in a related field, and meet people through that. Like... to give 8 hours of my work day to doing work on other peoples' stuff, time I could be spending in the studio. Then I can use that job to meet people who might give a shit about my work. It's hard to not read that as "I'm not a fan, I don' t know anyone who would have any interest in your shit, but maybe if you just work somewhere someone there might give a shit."

I don't know. I'm not against it, I could enjoy myself doing a wide array of jobs that aren't even directly art related. Archaeologist, work in a curiosity shop, or game shop, or an antique store. I just freak out about losing time. I've already lost so much, I constantly feel hopelessly behind because of years and years lost to stupid doctors and stupid misdiagnoses, and my own stupid anxiety complexes. Ugh. So every piece I finish, I feel like I need 100 more to even make a dent. Perpetually playing catch-up.

So yeah, that sucks a whole lot. And I tug this ball and chain around everywhere I go. And it's kinda relieving to say it out loud. Still feels very shameful. Probably all the loss attached to it. Idk.

I don't want to upset anyone. I just want to make my art and my music, my writing and my stories. That's all. I don't want to give it up. I just want to make it work. I made a lot of sacrifices to get to this point, I don't want to give up now. If all it takes to be a self-sustaining professional is time invested and hard work, I'll do whatever it takes. I don't give a fuck if it's just living paycheck to paycheck for the rest of my life and never owning a house or whatever. At least I don't let my soul die, just to keep my body alive. Again.

Sorry for the grumpiness, I'm just very tired of carrying this burden. All I want is for ONE of my list of ideas to start a chain reaction. That's all. Then I can finally proudly, confidently introduce myself to people. Until then, it will continue to be shame.

🌘Night night 🌒

#diary #stream of thoughts #journal

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real-good-now · 7 years ago

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Riverdale Books: a Bughead One-Shot

Loosely inspired by the movie “You've Got Mail”.

Summary: Jughead really just wants to find a book for Jellybean. He happens to get lucky when he goes into a small bookstore in Riverdale.

As Jughead approached the quaint little bookstore in the dinky suburb of Riverdale, he felt nothing but defeat in his heart.

It has to be here.

He had been searching high and low for this one book, a special edition, limited print of the only book Jellybean has ever liked, and this was his last stop. Her birthday was tomorrow and if the novel didn’t turn up here, then he would have to surrender his “Best Big Brother” Mug and give her an insincere Amazon Gift Card and an “I’m sorry” smile.

It has to be here.

He took a deep breath in before entering the store and being greeted by the charming ring of the bell above the door. A cursory glance around the front room told him that the store was certainly not as small as he had originally anticipated. There were shelves and shelves of books, ranging from the obscure to the commercially known, all organized by the color of their book jackets, something that couldn’t be a simple endeavor to maintain.

There seemed to be no one at the register and a large hoard of people huddled in the back, in a room that was alive with vibrant colors. He drifted toward the area, taking peeks here or there for his target.

When he arrived in the rear of the store, he understood exactly what had everyone so enraptured.

Three was a young woman, around his age, he presumed, who sat in a chair with a children’s book in her hand, surrounded by a group of enthralled five-year-olds and their parents. Her light blonde hair was tied in a tight pony-tail that moved with the turn of her head and her fair skin was complemented by a free-flowing floral dress.

Though her looks seem to draw him in, it was absolutely the soothing lilt of her voice that surely captured the attention of everyone who entered here. He could listen to her talk for hours, about anything, and never tire of the gentle timbre that she used. She had a calm about her, despite the craziness that must come from owning a haven for rambunctious kids.

Jughead was sure. He had to meet this woman.

He waited for her to finish the story book, applauding when the baby bird finally found his mother, and watching as all the mothers and fathers gushed about how much their kids loved her story time.

It took at least twenty minutes for the commotion to die down and most of the little ones and company to filter out, some even purchasing the book she read.

She was at the register when he finally decided it was time.

“Excuse me, Miss?” He said, already regretting his choice of an opening line. He didn’t “have much game” as his buddy Archie would say, but he could have certainly done better than that.

He was momentarily stunned when she turned around and her eyes met his. They were the most beautiful shade of green that he had ever seen, something could spend hours pouring over on his vintage Underwood but never truly capture.

She smiled brightly at him, warmth radiating through her features, “Yes! How can I help you?”

“I’m looking for this book”— he held out the warn out copy that Jelly had given to him “as a lone only”—“that they just had a limited release of a few weeks ago. I have looked through every Barnes and Nobles for 20 miles of the city and cannot find it for the life of me. Could you help? You are kinda my last hope.”

“You’re in luck!” She quipped. “I happen to have a few copies of it behind the desk. It is one of my favorites and I didn’t want to sell it to anyone who hasn’t read the regular edition.”

He sighed in relief at the news as she presented the book to him. “Oh, I haven’t read it myself…Its a gift for my sister. Her birthday is tomorrow and it is her absolute favorite book. Something I try not to take offense to as an author myself.”

She laughed at his comment, already hard at work on the gift wrapping before he even uttered the last of his thought. “Ahh, a writer. Anything I may have read?”

He blushed. He was proud of his work, but it was always awkward when people found out who he was. He wrote because he loved it, not for the paychecks or the recognition. “Mostly crime and mystery. Occasional satire. I write as F. Jones III.”

She smiled timidly at him, but the excitement in her eyes betrayed her. She knew him. “Yeah, I have definitely read your stuff. Look at the bookcase behind you. Third shelf from the top.”

He turned around to see the wood piece labeled “Owner’s Top Picks” and found the shelf she had mentioned. On that shelf, sat all of his published works. “My own shelf…I’m honored.”

The phrase came out as a joke, but, honestly, he was honored. This woman had a sincerity that is hard to come by. She obviously has a somewhat refined taste, judging by some of the notable literature that filled the shelves of the bookcase in front of him. He felt…special, to be among these greats, to be loved by her.

God, Jughead had only just met her and he was sold.

“It might not be there for long. Looks like they are constructing a new chain right down the block. Could really stamp us out,” she said, a wave of sadness clouding her delicate features. She finished the gift with a curly bow and handed it to him. “On the house. From a fan.”

“No! I insist, really.”

The woman looks at him, amused. “And I insist you take it. Get your sister the author’s new release when it comes out.”

Jughead cannot believe this woman. She wants to give him this limited edition book, which is easily over $100, probably much more. “I have to do something.” I have to see her again, he thinks, as she walks away from the counter, a broom in her hands. “Can I at least get your name? I’m Jughead.”

“Betty. Betty Cooper. So, what does the ‘F’ stand for?” She asked with a bemused expression on her face.

“How about I tell you over coffee?”

______________________________________________

That coffee date was the first of many.

Jellybean loved her birthday present, but was even more excited when Jughead brought a date to her party the following week.

Turns out that Betty meeting Jughead was the best thing to happen to the store. When it threaten to go under after a new corporate giant appeared down the street, Jughead’s book signing brought in enough traffic to keep them open for years to come.

Jughead thought that that meeting Betty was the best thing to happen to him.

He made sure to tell her that, a year later, when he got down on one knee in the middle of the store.

Any feedback would be greatly appreciated! I promise that Letters to Juliet will be updated soon. Hope you all like it!

#oneshot #bughead fanfiction #bughead #bughead one shot

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financiallymint · 7 years ago

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How I Manage Money in College – Money Mistakes

Second of the ‘How I manage money in college’ series! I am happy to present Jalpan Dave from Passive Income Engineering and his article on the important money mistakes he made in college and what he would have done differently. Some really great info here!

The story

My first encounter with the importance of money was back at the age of 13. My Dad’s friend gave him a copy of the book “Rich Dad Poor Dad” Since I was an only child, the only people I could interact with at home where my parents so I’d poke my nose into whatever they were doing.

The timing was perfect – my summer holidays were coming up and there was this nice colourful book in front of me which for all I know was written by a 13 year old just like me who had two fathers, one of whom was rich and the other…not so much.

I spent the entire summer vacation reading the book from 11pm to 5am in the morning. It felt wonderful! The book talked about two little kids who were trying to earn more money and came up with all kinds of weird and wonderful ways to do so including trying to make coins themselves thereby counterfeiting money!

Even though it took me so long to finish the book, it’s key lessons were hard wired into my brain from that point on including:

The rich learn to make money to work for them

An asset puts money in your pocket, a liability takes money out of your pocket

Investing is one of the ways you can build assets and thereby put money in your pocket

The book had such a profound impact on me that I still carry that tattered old book with me. I have relocated several times in my life but I have never lost the book. I still have the copy I read back when I was 13 years old:

Just looking at the book would remind me of the importance of investing so during college, I went to seminars about investing, read some more books and even took part in a stock investing competition in order to hone my skills.

Yet, when I graduated and started working, I had no idea where my money was going every month. Fortunately, I woke up one day and found I had $2,000 – enough money to buy some stocks. But despite all the books I had read and all the competitions I had taken part in, my mind went blank when it came to actually investing my real money.

Lesson learned: Knowledge is NOT power. APPLIED knowledge is power!

I started going to seminars and talks again hoping that someone will give me some “tips.” With the presentations and case studies that were shared at these seminars, I invested in 2 stocks. One of them, I still own to this day and it has paid me good dividends time after time.

The other stock… tanked 90% from the time I bought it! Thankfully, I had done my research so after 4 long years, I sold it back at the same price I bought it and got my money back so that I have to suffer no longer.

Eventually though, I learned the right way to invest and started earning income through investing as I write about on my blog.

However, every now and then, I meet someone who had gotten their act together since their college days. They do all the things that I do today now that I’m a little wiser. And every time I look at them, I think to myself, “I wish I hadn’t made these mistakes back in college.”

It dawned on me that fundamentally, what held me back during college was psychological. Subconsciously, I had been thinking “I’m still a student. I’m not supposed to me earning yet. Investing, earning, all those things are for people who have graduated already.”

Looking back, I wish someone had slapped me and told me to do all the things in college that I do now including:

1. Invest. For real.

Instead of thinking “I’ll invest the moment I get my first paycheck” I would have invested during college. This way, I could have made mistakes with small amounts of money instead of with a $2,000 sum which was far more painful to endure.

Most importantly, I would have been putting knowledge to practice which is more effective than simply gaining more knowledge. One reason why I wish there had been blogs like Financially Mint around is that it makes it much easier for college to get started with investing and sorting out their finances.

Every year you delay investing could mean several thousands of dollars (or pounds) lost over your lifetime. For instance, look at this article which proves that if you start investing at 25 as opposed to 35, all else being equal, you could end up with almost twice as much money later in life. Then pause for a second and think about what is possible if you started investing at 18 or 20 instead.

Imagine how far ahead you’ll be!

2. Start a side hustle.

Again, the main culprit here was my own limiting beliefs. “Adults start businesses. Not college students.”

WRONG!

Looking back, college would have been a perfect time to start a side hustle since there is no penalty for failure. If the business fails, big deal. I’d just get on with my studies and look for other ideas. I have no major bills to pay or a family to support. Moreover, if you ask someone in your university (a professor, your university’s entrepreneurship center etc…) chances are there are grants specifically intended for students to start businesses.

Today of course, you don’t even need much money to begin.

You could start a blog like many other students and working professionals, and if you really don’t want to spend any money you could always create a free account on medium.com and start blogging there.

3. Build good financial habits.

I thought I had learned everything about money. It was a painful realisation that what I had actually learned is how important it is to learn about money! I found myself spending on a whim certain times whilst other times, I would pinch pennies like there was no tomorrow.

Eventually, I learned that the way to build good financial habits is to take 30 mins out on the first of every month to divide your money into different bank accounts.

One bank account for investing, one for long term savings, and yes, one account for having fun!

For instance, say you plan to spend no more than $700 every month. You could leave $400 in your main account for food and other necessities, transfer $100 to another account to save for the long term, $100 to yet another account to invest and then $100 to yet another account for going out with friends, travelling or doing whatever else you love to do.

Your bank may even allow you to hold different debit cards that are tied to these different accounts. So when you go out with friends, you spend using the debit card connected to your “having fun” account. Once you had spent your $100, you card would deny future payments hence ensuring that you never overspend.

Building such habits early on means you are more likely to stick to them for the rest of your life setting you up for a lifetime of financial success.

One of Steve Jobs’ favourite Hindu sayings went something like this – “For the first 30 years of your life, you form your habits. For the rest of your life, your habits form you.”

Conclusion

I’d like to end by saying that in today’s world, anyone can do anything. We can start businesses online with no money down. We can start investing while still in college and get a head start on growing our money. Do not wait until you graduate and “enter the real world” to pursue your dreams and build a better financial future.

You can start building a better future TODAY whilst you are still in college.

Now I’d love for you to tell me in the comments below:

What is one tiny little step or habit you will start today to put yourself in a better financial situation?

I read and respond to every comment!

Financially Mint top takeaways

Top mistakes to avoid in college

1. Not investing: Get started with these guides: UK, USA 2. Not side-hustling: Here are some cool jobs and side-hustle ideas 3. Not implementing good habits: budgeting, saving, investing.

A ton of valuable advice in this article. I really love the tip of having different debit cards for different types of spending. And the great important message: yes you can start anything, even in college. Who’s motivated to get started?!!

Read more like this over at Financially Mint

#budget #studentonabudget #financiallymint #college #university #collegehacks #financialeducation

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omegaplus · 7 years ago

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# 2,034

Our #1 seller Salman came to ask me “how many apps you got?” “Apps”, meaning customers who apply for our store card. Our location whips us to death over them, win or lose. It’s what keeps businesses alive through steady streaming income. A couple of years ago, I was #1 in the store for money made and applications. Then Salman arrived. Since then, no one has beaten him in those two categories. He’s our monthly winner for more than two years now. We all tease him on how it’s impossible to catch up to him. Many of our customers ask for him and him only. We have re-sellers who come in weekly and buy multiples of big ticket items from him because he gets permission to ring them up. He’s also at the right place at the right time, more so than others. He also averages anywhere from 2-4 apps a day, making his position as the #1 seller so easy and everyone else’s life much more difficult. But he’s also the nicest and most easy-going of all of us. He’s a family man who games, has a wife and two children, lives in a wealthy north-shore neighborhood, and prays five times a day with no interruption. No customer has ever disrespected him, and if they did, I’d be the first to step in and get involved like it’s none of my business. Welcome to New York.

I told Salman I had only a few and was lagging behind, enough so that if we didn’t hit our quota, we’d be here first thing Sunday morning before opening. “You know there’s something waiting for you in the office” as he signaled his hand dealing out money. “Go talk to Suarez. He has money for you.” What? That made no sense. We do get water bottles, free lunch, or soda for hitting our daily goal. What are you saying? I did a sub-par job, go get your prize? But something was off. When did we start getting individual bonuses for goals now? Did we ever? I told Muhammad with a jigsaw look on my face I’d be right back. Onward march I go.

In our office waiting for me was Cristas, the tough Spanish lady with thick-rim glasses and tattoos smattered on her arms. Also in the office was Suarez, our store lead who was born with a mean face and stayed there. All wasn’t threatening, however. Christina with the double braids was also sitting in the office having her nature bar waiting for my arrival to witness the genesis of our conversation as I arrive.

Cristas: "Do you know what February 23rd is?"

me: “…”

Cristas: “Do you?”

me: "Earthquake? Comet? Tsunami?"

The whole office burst out laughing. Only me out of 100 people who work in this store would have an affinity for mythological destruction and would wish nothing less but the worst for half of humanity in grand nihilistic matter. Suarez then inserted: “we just got news that not only did we receive a $20,000,000 charitable grant, but since our company did great this year, we’re all getting $1,000 bonuses. So, congratulations and feel good knowing you’re working with a great company.”

The news turned my entire day around. I went from feeling jaded and disaffected to feeling naturally very high. It’s not every day you’re handed a sizeable bonus. It’s not every day that triple-A corporations throw money at their employees, either. Thanks to our president’s tax plan, some of these corporations are doing just that. I leave the office and my mind is spinning furiously. Instead of thinking about my latest disappointment, I’m now thinking about how to spend the money we’re all getting. Last summer, I planned on treating myself with the leave-of-absence benefits adding up in my savings until having to take that money out until coming back to work. With this, a third monthly paycheck, and this year's tax refund, I'll be back in the pocket where I was this past summer. Record-shopping. Modern Pinball. Sunshine Laundromat (more pinball). Mail-order. Raygun magazines. Maybe a new Nikon kit, denims, music tees, archival equipment, some Pac-Man memorabilia, and a possible trip to the Silverball Museum. Should I feel real frisky? A 1976 Nishijin Montreal Olympics pachinko machine, and a 1977 Big Top Pinball table; both which my family used to have. Maybe those could wait until the promotion.

Back at the radio station, we at Omega WUSB had so much fun with our shows. More this broadcasting season that any other. Two label anniversaries in one broadcast, two Best of 2017 shows, and two darkness sets which we’re always very happy to play every winter. I’ll say it stemmed from a city show I went to a couple of years ago: Consumer Electronics at Saint Vitus, December 2015. The experience of being at that show and everything around it; walking through Greenpoint down Manhattan Ave., the audience culture, the train rides, waiting on platforms and taking the train rides smelling that warm cooked salty steel. Discourse has become my life for the past several years and it’s going getting wider. It’s everything I do. With that visit to Warsaw for Hospital Productions 20th, the tradition continues and doing these shows becomes more personal. I fucking love every minute of it.

The camaraderie that comes with being in WUSB is another thing special. I still can’t find another place like our studios on the island where you can find like-minded people. We have green party activists, jazz aficionados, and Brooklyn-minded kids. We have queer boys and trans-individuals who we give unconditional respect like every other person who walks through our studio doors. Intellectuals, record collectors, local fixtures, hip-hop teams, and engineers who have been with us since our AM days in the Sixties. Then we have Conor of Headless Elvis, one of the most respectable and respected talents on our station. He’s not only a drummer of the band, but lives, breathes, talks, and knows a lot about the metagame of music in general. The dee-jay’s dee-jay, the musician’s musician. A true jack-of-all-trades who loves the likes of Unstoppable Death Machines, the d.i.y. spaces, working with small indie labels, and writing articles about various scenes, too.

This past weekend, Toasty, Christmas, Alosha, and I hang out with Conor in the studio during his show and kicked off a discussion about whether or not fans of inactive bands should build up their expectations over their favorites sounding the same after re-uniting or releasing new albums after years of absence. (Think My Bloody Valentine, The Smashing Pumpkins, Guns N’ Roses, and even Weezer.) He also discussed seeing both Lightning Bolt and The Sun Ra Arkestra at a city movie theatre, and others chimed in about their wish lists of bands they were going to see over the summer. Being part of that discussion made me feel that a new experience is long overdue. That’s who Conor and the other staffers were, a collective of new jacks who share, take, and give back an active inspirational energy that makes us feel alive. And give back I did when Conor said that the L.I.E.S. label was one he has been dying to check out. That’s when I sent him all of Ron Morelli’s solo projects and the label compilations. He was amazed. Here at WUSB, we do look out for each other.

I come home to tidy up and straighten my library. Personal copies of Merzbow’s Pornoise 1Kg cassettes, Boyd Rice��s Standing In Two Circles and No, Philip Best’s Alien Existence and Captagon, Prurient’s Rose Pillar. The RRRecords shipment received last Autumn. I’m so proud of it. I love the art and fucking intellectualism. It reminds me of the lot of merchandise, books, cassettes, and vinyl records I found on the tables at the Hospital line-up in Warsaw. I still can’t get over that show. What an experience to be with people and a demographic you can relate to that you don’t get on Long Island. I take that flag back home with me to establish it, and back to the studio for all to hear because I want to represent something that’s truly lacking here. I have more than I could’ve imagined. This is what it’s all about: the back and forth of ideas, influences, aesthetics, the burning desire of knowledge and being inspired by the right people because you can never have enough. Now, I give it back to everyone seeing this, because I love the interactions I have with some of you.

Spring is around the corner, the season of renewal and new opportunities. I’m so ready to go.

Winter 2018 mixtape:

XXYYXX B-Sides

Odd Nosdam Trish

Goth-Trad “Air Breaker”

William S. Burroughs “Summer Will”

Girl Pusher “Better Off Alone” (live)

Liars “Staring At Zero”

Prayers “Edge Of The Blade”

Gary War “Don’t Go Out Tonight”

Pond “Colder Than Ice”

Contrepoison “Heartbeat”

Bad Zu “Motherfuckers”

Silent Servant “The Strange Attractor”

Peaches “Convincing People”

Deerhoof “Singalong Junk”

Ron Morelli “Radar Version”

Zola Jesus “Siphon”

Goth-Trad “Disorder”

Bad Zu “Queen”

Believer/Law “Foxhole Prayers”

Tame Impala Currents B-sides

Lust For Youth “Display”

Grizzly Bear “Mourning Sound”

Adult. “Dance Avoid”

Molly Nilsson “I Hope You Die”

Blvck Ceiling “Hello, Miracala”

Silent Servant “Self-Hypnosis”

Princess Century “Crummy Bones”

Uniform “The Lost”

Pharmakon “Transmission”

Grimes “Genesis” (Blvck Ceiling RMX)

Russell Haswell “Hardwax Flashback” (Powell RMX)

Ninos Du Brasil “A Magia Do Rei II”

Cults “I Took your Picture With My Eyes Closed”

Machine Girl “Freewill (Phase β)”

Silent Servant “Disassociation”

KVB, The “White Walls”

Moon Diagrams “Magic Killer”

Men, The “( )”

Sunn O))) “It Took The Night To Believe”

Ninos Du Brasil “Vagalumes Pirilampos”

Rezzett “Zootie”

Horrorist, The “Programmed” (Silent Servant RMX)

Silent Servant “Cut Unconscious”

Drvg Cvltvre “Waging A War Against God”

Believer/Law “Ashes”

Rainforest Spiritual Enslavement “Watery Grave”

Boy Harsher “Pain”

Brainbombs “Drive Around”

I Hate Models “Cyanure Dance”

Vatican Shadow “Weapons Inspection”

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allenmendezsr · 4 years ago

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Starting A Freelance Copywriting Guide

New Post has been published on https://autotraffixpro.app/allenmendezsr/starting-a-freelance-copywriting-guide/

Starting A Freelance Copywriting Guide

Buy Now

Get a Roadmap to Finding High Paying Clients, Working on Projects You Love, and Gaining the Freedom to Live Life On Your Terms

Dream of working from the beach on your laptop?

Becoming a freelance copywriter sounds like a dream job.

You get to work from home or from coffee shops…

You can set your own hours…

Pick your own clients…

And you can earn a doctor’s salary tapping at a keyboard all day.

No doubt about it…

Compared to the normal working world of office politics, hours stuck in traffic, and being chained to a desk…

Becoming a freelance copywriter can be a dream come true.

BUT…

You’ve got a minefield of challenges to navigate to make that dream come true.

If you’ve no agency experience, no samples, and no previous clients, some of the challenges you’ll face include:

Developing copy skills clients will happily pay you for (and develop them FAST, rather than the years it takes many newbies).

Knowing where to find clients who’ll pay a FAIR rate for your services (you may be SHOCKED how fast your bank account will shrink when you no longer have a paycheck to feed into it).

Working out how to create proposals that will get you selected ahead of the pack of other hungry copywriters they’ve contacted

Ensuring your invoices get paid and the client doesn’t go AWOL the moment you’ve sent them the final draft (there’s no shortage of sharks eager to feast on newbie copywriters who don’t know how to chase unpaid invoices)

Fail to overcome any of these challenges and your freelance copywriting dream can go up in smoke.

You may then face the terrible day when you have to swallow your pride and start hunting for a J.O.B.

Sadly, few of the books on copywriting or $5,000 courses guide you on how to successfully launch a copywriting career (I should know, as I’ve done a bunch of them).

Sure, they can teach you the mechanics.

But they don’t explain how to solve the challenges that decide if a copywriting business lives or dies in the critical first six months.

Even then, many newbie copywriters STRUGGLE for years to earn the bumper paychecks they were promised.

As many as two thirds of new businesses FAIL within six years.

Nearly HALF fail to make enough money to continue operating in the first year.

Because…

Having great copy skills is useless when you don’t understand the business side of becoming a freelance copywriter.

The reason I know all this is because I learned how to become a freelance copywriter the HARD way.

Shooting the breeze with Mr Drayton Bird – one of the world’s foremost direct marketers

My name’s Matt Ambrose.

I first got started in copywriting in 2006.

But only after years of working in a soul sucking corporate job just to pay the bills.

Every week felt like rolling a boulder up a hill, only to see it crashing to the bottom by Monday morning.

And navigating the world of office politics was driving me nuts.

Bottom line – I was miserable and desperate to escape.

The good news is that I made a remarkable discovery.

On one of my trawls through job sites, I discovered this strange sounding profession called ‘copywriter’.

A few Google searches later and I couldn’t believe what I was reading…

Businesses PAY people to write their emails, websites, and blog posts?

My simmering excitement then exploded when I saw HOW MUCH.

Recruitment agencies were offering $500 per day…

Salaries of $60,000 per year and up…

for people willing to sit at a desk and WRITE ALL DAY!

It was like discovering a new world of possibilities.

A world I knew I had to enter as fast as possible.

But I had a problem…

While I had a degree in English and History and positive feedback on my ‘lucid’ writing style, I didn’t have a jot of copywriting experience.

But I knew…

I HAD to find a way of making my dream of becoming a copywriter come true.

So I leapt into building my copy chops with gusto.

I dedicated six months to studying everything I could find on copywriting…

I bought all the books on Amazon (which wasn’t half as many as there now)…

Created a portfolio of press releases, articles, and self made brochures…

And cobbled together a basic website on Dreamweaver (back then WordPress was purely for blogs about cats).

But having the (admittedly, basic) skills to write for businesses was one thing.

Finding businesses willing and able to pay for my services was another thing entirely.

Had I known then what I know now, I would have thought twice about quitting my corporate job so eagerly.

Because…

I struggled for YEARS until I was profitable.

Many times I’d wake at 3am and start to panic about where the next project and paycheck would come from…

And whether my friends had been right all along that “nobody is going to pay you to write for them.”

Would I have to swallow my pride, admit defeat, and go back to a dreary office job and monthly paycheck?

I desperately wished someone would guide me on what to do…

how to find quality clients…

how to get paid what I deserved…

and how to ensure projects kept coming in without endless cold emailing and getting shutdown by marketing agency secretaries.

But I managed to find enough work to keep going.

Sure, I continued to make a boatload of mistakes.

Mistakes that often cost me a lot of money from undercharging, missing out on projects, and not properly working out what the client wanted.

But I kept dusting myself down… learning from them… and struggling on the path I’d chosen.

Well, I’m pleased to say that all the pain and struggle was worth it.

Because for me…

The freelance copywriting dream is NOW a reality.

I’m now able to charge:

$200 per email

$1,000 for advertorials

$10,000+ for a video sales letter funnels

(Earnings disclaimer – You shouldn’t expect to earn this amount for a LONG time in your career. It takes years of training, practice, and getting results to earn the big bucks)

Not only that, but I’ve been able to:

-Grow a client list of 100+ companies including major B2B brands, like Siemens, Technicolor, Deutsche Post and Sage

-Generated $1m+ for clients in B2C markets, notably natural health

– Passed an audition to write for Clayton Makepeace (one of the world’s most successful copywriters alive today)

-Invited to appear on Copy Chief Radio, the Just Add Hustle podcast and interviewed for a series on Greatest Living Copywriters.

So I’m glad to say all the stress, night terrors, and struggle was worth it.

Even better, I now get to travel the world and work wherever I go…

enjoying what us senior laptop nomads call the ‘International Lifestyle’.

Hiking trip in Laos, one of many this year

So far I’ve lived in Malta, Chiang Mai, Berlin, Budapest, Prague, Krakow, Ho Chi Minh, Bangkok, Lisbon, The Canary Islands, and Kuala Lumpur… just to name a few.

But the only reason this became possible was because I was able to overcome all the challenges of the first few critical years of launching a new freelance copywriting business.

The good news is, you don’t have to go through all the same struggles I went through.

You don’t have to deal with the expensive trial and error…

The fear of not knowing where you’ll find your next client…

Or frustration when you find out you’ve been charging much less than you deserve.

Because I’ve written down everything I discovered on my journey and compiled it into a actionable guide.

Funnily enough, it’s called…

How to Start a Freelance Copywriting Business without Any Experience

Over 108 pages it reveals all the tactics, strategies and knowledge I developed when launching my own freelance copywriting career from scratch.

This includes:

Where to find clients who’ll pay you a fair rate for your skills (rather than fighting over sweatshop wages in freelance bidding sites)

How to RAPIDLY develop copy skills clients will eagerly pay you for (when you haven’t written a marketing press release, email, or article in your life, let alone a high converting sales letter)

How to create a portfolio of red hot samples that get clients queuing up to hire you (while earning enough money to support yourself in the first critical 6 months)

The easy way to create a professional looking website that reflects the quality of your writing (without spending a fortune to a web developer or having to learn how to code)

How to turn small projects into long-term clients who continue hiring you for months, or even years (while saving you the time suck of endless prospecting)

How to submit proposals that get you selected ahead of the pack of other hungry copywriters your client has approached (and ensure you get hired based on VALUE and not the lowest rate)

What to do so you don’t get ripped off by the sharks who love to hire newbies and then vanish without paying

Quickstart guides to writing emails, landing pages, sales letters, and more (so you can be open for business as fast as possible).

What to charge so you get paid what you’re worth and aren’t scrambling for change from low ball clients who don’t value or respect your work

How to maximise your chances of being profitable in the first couple of months before your ‘take off strip’ funds run out

The tactical way to raise your prices (so your existing clients aren’t just happy to pay it but are wondering why it took you so long)

Project management tips so you’re the ‘adult in the room’ clients are looking for and so you become more valuable to them than a simple wordsmith

This is just a sample of what How to Start Freelance Copywriting Without Any Experience covers.

It’s the same advice I’ve given to university graduates, former journalists, and even fellow copywriters to jumpstart their copywriting careers.

Yet, more than that, it’s designed to…

Give you a roadmap for avoiding all the traps I fell into…

while gaining advice that can ACCELERATE the growth of your skills… EXPLODE your client base… and open up the money hose so fast you can be profitable in weeks, not months or years.

Heck, it reveals so many trade secrets I may just be creating competition for myself.

But there are millions of businesses in need of our services, and plenty of work for everyone.

Gain All This Insider Knowledge for a Fraction of What I’d Charge in Person

When you consider the years it took me to acquire all the knowledge my guide contains…

the weeks I spent working on How to Start a Freelance Copywriting Business without Any Experience…

and the fact it has the potential to fast track your progress at securing the big bucks…

I think $100 for this guide would be a fair investment.

It’s what I’d charge for a thirty minute consultation.

Yet you’re getting TONS more info than I could ever cover in that time.

When you consider how its advice on pricing… getting paid… and finding high paying clients could generate thousands for you in the first year…

$100 is a drop in the ocean.

Yet, I’m going to make this investment in your skills and knowledge even MORE valuable to you.

Because if you order How to Start a Freelance Copywriting Business without Any Experience from this page, you also get…

4 FREE Bonuses

Copywriter Consulting Pack – $37 Value

Get the 3 VITAL documents every copywriter needs: A project contract with terms that give you legal protection, my onboarding process for new clients, and a client questionnaire for scoping out new projects.

Copywriter’s Crucible Big 33 – $37

Get 33 of my post popular posts from my award nominated blog on more advanced topics like positioning, pro level mindset hacks, and insider tactics for generating higher returns for clients.

47 Elite Email Marketing Tips – $17 value

7 Steps to Creating Quality Content – $17 value

Email may be old, yet it’s still the workhorse of internet marketing. Smart marketers also know that getting customers on an email list is essential to avoid their social media accounts getting shut down. In this report, you get 47 of my best email marketing tips and strategies, so you can instantly start offering email marketing services to clients.

Marketing can be like dating. Some prospects will be eager to buy the moment you make an offer. Others need to be coaxed with content that develops the relationship over time. In this report, you get my 7 step strategy for creating content that’s unique, compelling, and converts more prospects into buyers.

When you add the bonuses up (quick tip – this is called ‘value stacking’) they come to $108.

This raises the total value of How to Start a Freelance Copywriting Business Without Any Experience to:

$208

But I know that when starting out you don’t have tons of cash to throw around.

And I want How to Start a Freelance Copywriting Business Without Any Experience to be affordable, so as many new starters as possible can avoid the struggles I went through.

So from this page only, you can get How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience and all 4 bonuses for the small one time investment of…

$208 > $27

That’s right.

Just $27.

A mere fraction of the package’s total value and an amount you can recoup within the first month of putting its advice into action.

Here’s what one reader had to say about it…

“Being in the market for good copywriting knowledge, I checked this out. If the highly nauseating, cheesy, tiresome, cliched, paint-by-numbers copywriting style of the Warrior Forum, with the same templates with slightly different wording, such as ”Who Else Wants Their Own Cash Machine That Runs On Autopilot While You Drink Beer Watching The Game…”, or ”Here’s How To Get Your Own Slice Of The Facebook Money Pie Before Your Competition Does” doesn’t turn your stomach like it does mine, and you wish to replicate the same moronic pattern in your marketing, then this book is for you. If you want to write sophisticated, non-gimmicky, non-slimy persuasive copy that does everything it needs to to sell, but keeps your credibility and integrity intact, you probably can’t do much better than this guide I’ve been fortunate to stumble upon. I’ve checked out a lot of the best copywriting courses lately and this outshines all of them. On the Warrior Forum, the maxim is surely that bullshit hype sells. And to the idiots there (and some here) who consume that stuff relentlessly, it does. But in B2B, you’ll only turn off your readers. This book covers the fundamentals perfectly but gives in a brief, logical format to provide a great solid structure.” – underground906

And another buyer kindly had this to say in a LinkedIn chat:

Double Your Investment In 60 Days or Get Your Money Back

Does $27 sound fair for a guide that can pay for itself many times over with its advice on pricing and getting paid alone?

Or are you still on the fence?

If so, how about you download the guide and all it’s bonuses and and see what you think.

Then if you aren’t 100% satisfied I’ll give you a FULL refund.

Because How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience is supplied with a 100% risk free 60 day guarantee.

What this means is that if you’re not impressed with the quality of the content… it doesn’t answer your questions… or doesn’t help to fast track your success you can get a full refund.

All you need to do is contact Clickbank’s customer support team via the link in your receipt. They’ll then refund your purchase in full. No awkward questions or hoops to jump through.

What matters to me is that you’re able to give How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience a try.

And if it doesn’t help advance your career, I’d rather you get your money back to invest in other resources and we can part as friends.

Give Yourself a Better Launchpad to Freelance Copywriting Success

Let’s do a quick rundown of what we’ve covered…

If you’re just getting started in your freelance career you’ve got a minefield of challenges to get through.

You’re going to need to know how to create portfolio that convinces clients to hire you…

You need to know how to find high paying clients, so you can avoid the sweatshop rates on freelance bidding sites…

And you’ve got to ensure you’re charging what you deserve, so you don’t become a victim of the sharks who love to feed on newbie copywriters.

If you can’t solve these challenges, the freelance dream can soon turn into a nightmare.

But there’s no need to go through the painful process of learning from your mistakes that I went through.

Because…

How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience gives you all the answers at your fingertips

It eliminates the confusion on creating proposals… knowing where to find clients and how to convince them to hire you… and rubberstamps you’re getting paid what you’re worth.

In fact, its advice on pricing, how to turn one off projects into five figure retainers, and advice on writing emails, web pages and sales letters is worth hundreds of dollars alone.

Yet you’re getting the entire motherload for just $27.

Just $27 for a complete system that can take you from struggling amateur to highly paid professional in no time.

And without the stress, sleepless nights, and costly mistakes I went through.

Also remember, your investment is protected with a 60 day money back guarantee.

So what do you say?

Do we have a deal?

P.S. My guide How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience reveals all my insider secrets to launching a profitable freelance copywriting business without a portfolio, clients, or even a website.

It’s packed with all the tactics, strategies and processes I’ve used to grow my own copywriting business to the point where I can work from my laptop and travel the world at the same time.

It’s already helped fast track the progress of hundreds of struggling newbies to develop into professionally astute, highly paid copywriters

If it doesn’t help grow your career in the first 60 days, you can get a full refund. No questions asked.

FAQ

Will the advice in this book work for me?

How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience contains the exact same advice I wished I had when starting out. It’s also the same advice I’ve given to new graduates, former journalists, and countless other people who’ve contacted me for advice on getting started.

Rather than repeat the same advice over and over again, I decided to compile it all into this report.

Who is this book for?

How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience answers all the questions and challenges I faced when starting a freelance business.

Sure, new tactics for finding clients and what to charge come and go. But I believe the information in How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience on pricing, prospecting, proposals, getting paid, and more stands the test of time.

But I wouldn’t recommend How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience if you’re looking for advice on improving your skills.

While it does include a basic guide to writing articles, sales letters, and more, its focus is on the business side of copywriting. So if you’re looking for advice on improving your copywriting skills, there are plenty of courses I recommend instead. This includes Copyhour, John Carlton’s Simple Writing System, and AWAI’s Six Figure Copywriting Course.

What if I don’t find it helpful? Can I get my money back?

Absolutely.

What matters to me is that you give How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience a try. So if you’re unimpressed with the quality of the content, it doesn’t help advance your career, or you just don’t like the formatting, contact Clickbank’s customer support team and they’ll give you a full refund.

Earnings Disclaimer – As with any business, your results may vary and will be based on your individual capacity, skills, expertise, and level of desire. There are no guarantees concerning the level of success you may experience from my guide and its bonuses. There is no guarantee that you will make any income at all and you accept the risk that the earnings and income statements made in this page may not reflect your own. The use of our information, products and services should be based on your own due diligence and you agree that The Copywriter’s Crucible Ltd is not liable for any success or failure of your business that is directly or indirectly related to the purchase and use of How to Become a Freelance Copywriter Without Experience.

ClickBank is the retailer of products on this site. CLICKBANK® is a registered trademark of Click Sales, Inc., a Delaware corporation located at 917 S. Lusk Street, Suite 200, Boise Idaho, 83706, USA and used by permission. ClickBank’s role as retailer does not constitute an endorsement, approval or review of these products or any claim, statement or opinion used in promotion of these products Copyright © 2009-2016, The Copywriter’s Crucible Ltd All Rights Reserved.

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candidlycaro-blog · 5 years ago

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Phoenix

Well, I haven’t been on Tumblr (besides a school project) since I was 15 years old. This used to be my place to vent, share my feelings, write creatively, and obviously post the impromptu emo-cutting GIF that this trash website used to be filled with nonstop. I’m just thankful that it’s popularity decreased and I was actually able to get this username? Kinda sick. You know what I mean.

SO-- what brings me back? There’s a lot of easy answers to this question and then I think there are deeper ones. The most obvious, glaring answer is that I got dumped last week. No, not the kind of dumped that makes me want to key his car (it’s a Honda, anyway) or punch him in the face, but the kind that makes you take a real big look at yourself on the inside. So I did that. I took everything that he said and I looked inside-- and for the first time in the entirety of our relationship I realized something. He was right. (If you’re reading this I promise this was a half-joke meant for dramatic effect, you deserve more credit where credit is due!)

But in all seriousness, I took a look at myself and I didn’t like what I saw. I saw a girl so consumed by negativity, fixation, and obsession that she forgot how to be happy. I looked in the mirror and saw someone whose idea of self care was skipping a meal or putting off smoking weed until AFTER doing something that was much more important (no friends, I am not getting rid of weed. I should. But right now it makes me laugh when I want to cry so I think I’ll be sticking to it for a bit).

Anyways, the point that I’m trying to make is that he really did me a favor. Not a favor as in like leaving me, in fact I’m pretty sure we’re on fine terms considering we almost broke his bed and my knee having sex the other day but I’m talking bigger picture. He actually cared about me enough to be like HEY FUCKER. YOU’RE NOT YOU ANYMORE. And for a bit I hated him for that-- I really did! I was like dude, fuck, two years of my life and you’re telling me this isn’t SERIOUS? But, when I realized he had signed up for something completely different it kind of clicked with me. He didn’t sign up for this or this version of myself, he signed up for the happy go-lucky Caro that lit up every room she walked into. Not to say that our SO’s shouldn’t be through thick and thin, but when thick becomes your entire lifestyle it’s different. And I got it. I seriously stood in front of my mirror this weekend, took a huge look, and was like well, fuck, who is this?

I don’t really know where she went, but I used to like actually enjoy life. I used to like doing activities, getting up early for workout classes (something I think I’d rather swallow literal shit for than do now), being incredibly kinky, cooking, taking my dog places-- I don’t know, point being, I was a person. Now all I seem to do is sit in my job from like 9:30 (fine, 10 if we’re being honest) to 7, maybe I have a good day if I’m lucky, I would leave, go to my (ex)boyfriends apartment and complain up the wazoo, smoke, sleep, and repeat. Is that ANY FUCKING WAY TO LIVE? I THINK NOT!

Like as much as what he said hurt me, he was completely right. Who the fuck was I? Why was I making both of us so unhappy and why couldn’t I at least see it? And I think the most hurtful question or the one that pains me the most rather is why did it take me so long to realize? Because it’s not like he never told me or gave me the chance to change, he really did. But I didn’t want to change and I wasn’t ready to. I was content being that type of person for some reason and didn’t really realize what was at stake.

And it wasn’t just the relationship that was at stake-- if it was then the whole point of this post or whatever would be so fucking dumb. I didn’t realize that MY LIFE WAS AT STAKE. I’m 22 why the FUCK am I hung up, sad, complaining nonstop, wasting my life smoking it away (once again, I love you weed but only in doses. Like crack!-- kidding. kind of) instead of having amazing sex with someone I was so infatuated by, getting in the best physical shape of my life (I was an exercise science major, after 25 shit goes DOWNHILL!), spending time with family friends and just enjoying. I actually started hating GOING OUT too which like if you know me you know I’m not a huge drinker but I always was down to go out and just like socialize? What happened to that?

Bottom line: shits gotta change. And like I kind of wish it could be one of those self-discovery things where I’m like “what do I need to change? I’ll do it and find myself randomly in Thailand with the elephants, ah!”-- but I know exactly what I need to change. And I’ve made some INTENTIONS.

1. Appreciation

Something me and my (ex)boyfriend agreed on heavily was that we took each other for granted. When we spent time together we’d just be there on our phones, not really appreciating and recognizing how lucky we both were to be in the presence of someone that loves you. That lack of appreciation turned into resentment, and I don’t want that to happen in any of my relationships-- family, friends, lovers, whatever. I won’t let that happen again. I want everyone in my life to know that I appreciate them, I want to be present with them. I don’t want to go on my phone when I’m at dinner with friends, I want to give my parents all the attention they deserve, and frankly I want everyone in my life to know they’re loved. Ex boyfriend included.

2. Motivation

I don’t really know where this one went. When I was in kindergarten I remember kicking a middle schooler in the nuts simply because he told me I couldn’t go on the swing because I was a girl. My ultra feminist chic 5 year old self would kick ME in the VAGINA if she knew that I was acting like this. I am such a lucky, lucky girl with a loving family, friends, and more. I’m smart, I’m beautiful, I know my self-worth and most importantly-- I know that I can succeed anything I put my mind to. Why am I fucking afraid of yoga, or running, or failing. It’s time to get the fuck up and do it. Did I go to yoga today? Yes. Did I cry twice when Mac Miller came on in the middle? Also yes. But I WENT. And that’s better than the day before!

3. Calm

Everyone who knows me knows I live breathe shit anxiety. It’s something I’ve dealt with my entire life and something I never really put in the effort to fix. Sure I’m on lexapro, I used to spoof my ex’s klonopon every once in a while and at one point I smuggled 100 xanax from Mexico. But like I’ve never gotten to the root of it. Yes, I know I have death-anxiety because my parents are literal dinosaurs. Yes, I know I’m insecure because my ADHD makes me seem annoying. I know all these things, and based off of all the psych classes I’ve taken in the past I could probably hit the nail on the head but I’m not a professional. It’s time to stop self-diagnosing, fixating, and get some damn help. Maybe if I wasn’t so stressed and pushed that stress onto everyone else everyone in my life would be happier? I know my ex definitely would be.

4. Work is what it is-- work. It’s not your life

As mentioned above, I live breathe and shit anxiety. I also live breathe and shit my job and it’s time for that to stop. I don’t give two shits anymore if I had a bad day, if someone’s trying to cause shit or my boss is a bitch. At the end of the day I’m there to get money? If the opportunity cost of my happiness versus my paycheck is at such a huge discrepancy it’s time to rethink careers. Not saying I’m quitting my job, but I need to learn to start leaving work at work. They don’t pay me after I go home so I shouldn’t think about it. Easier said than done but I need to work on it.

5. Acceptance

Let’s be real-- I have an acceptance problem. I refused to accept it when my ex left me, I refused to accept it when my dad got sick (I actually fully never visited him in the hospital after he had a stroke which is one of my most embarrassing secrets. That one felt good to get out!), and sometimes I just blatantly refuse to accept things I can’t change.

As my wise mother Charlene once said,

You can’t make someone call you back who doesn’t want to.

You can’t make someone love you who doesn’t.

And most importantly, you can’t change what you can’t change. But what you can change is YOU. And that’s exactly what I intend to do.

It’s been Day 1 of this journey, and it definitely wasn’t easy. I cried 6 times, ate two donuts, almost passed out in crescent moon pose, heard my ex’s favorite song in MY YOGA CLASS and started crying in front of a group of randos, but I got up. I went to work. I got on the mat and was present. I focused on my breathing. I cried my eyes out to Fleetwood Mac, Selena Gomez, & Lady Gaga all in one day. Weird combination but it’s fine. Will Day 2 be easier? Probably not-- but it’s not supposed to be. Changing and molding yourself isn’t supposed to be easy. If it was then every single time me and my ex had this same exact conversation we would’ve changed. But we didn’t. I know this is going to be hard-- probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. But it will also be the most worth it.

-Caro

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bigyack-com · 5 years ago

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3 Simple Things You Can Do Today to Improve Your Finances

Welcome to the Smarter Living newsletter! Every Monday, S.L. editor Tim Herrera emails readers with tips and advice for living a better, more fulfilling life. Sign up here to get it in your inbox.No, I’m not going to tell you to skip tomorrow’s latte (or whatever minuscule semiregular purchase you make). Sure, you’re welcome to skip it, and if lattes make up a truly consequential portion of your budget, then cutting back would probably help. But for most of us, it’s simply unhelpful advice.Then what does matter when it comes to personal finance? Well, more than skipping the occasional latte, getting a grip on your finances is about knowing where you want to go in the big picture, and knowing what steps will get you there.Let me back my way into a personal example to show what I mean. My goal for this year is to save 60 percent of my income. It’s a stretch goal for sure — last year I saved around 35 percent — but it’s probably achievable. (And even if I fail, I’ll still likely end up saving more than I did last year, which is a win.)But why is this my goal? And how will I actually get there?Those are the two questions to ask yourself when you’re thinking about your money. In the big picture, I am saving for a down payment on a home — this is my why. But more important is my how: For me, that how is a combination of increasing my mindless saving (more on that below); decreasing my mindless spending (also more on that below); and eating out less, because that is by far the most consequential portion of my budget that I can directly control.Your whys and hows will, of course, be different from mine, but knowing what they are is the only way you’ll get your financial house in order. Having goals is great, but better is truly knowing why those are your goals and how you’re going to get there.Welcome to Personal Finance Week in Smarter Living. Each day we’ll publish a fresh story on money that will help you in your financial life. Whether you’re struggling with credit card debt, have no idea how to invest, never learned how to balance spending methods or need to have that dreaded “My parents are retiring and I don’t know what to do” conversation, we’ve got you covered. Check nytimes.com/smarterliving each day this week to keep up.To kick things off, here are three things you can do today, right after reading this, that can help you reach your goals.

Stop saving your money

O.K., to be a little clearer: Stop actively saving your money. Automate it so you just don’t have to think about it. This is what I mean by mindless saving.Your paycheck should be making pit stops before it hits your account, getting a little smaller with each stop. The priority of these stops, and the amounts saved, will vary based on your current financial life, but the general idea is the same: Automate your savings so you never even have to think about saving anything. Take yourself completely out of the equation — you can’t miss (or spend) what was never there. Self-control is a myth anyway, so just don’t bother with it.There are many ways to do this, all of which you can do right after reading this: increase your 401(k) contributions by a percentage point today; have your workplace split your paycheck among separate savings accounts; have your investment accounts make automatic withdrawals the day your paycheck hits your account; increase your automatic contribution to your Health Savings Account; or set up or increase recurring transfers from your checking account to your savings account.Whatever your savings needs are, the point is to make them automatic. Again, you can’t miss (or spend) what was never there. Stop budgeting to save X amount each month, and just have that amount removed from the equation.If you’re just starting out, balance paying down high-interest debt (generally anything with an interest rate above 5 or 6 percent) with saving for your emergency fund (if you haven’t established this yet, aim to build your savings to $1,000 or the equivalent of one month’s expenses, whichever is more). Paying off high-interest debt offers a bigger return on your money than almost anything else you can do, and having a cushion of savings is crucial for all of the events you can’t predict.If you’re a little further along, you have lots of options. As an example, here are the five stops my money automatically makes: 401(k); then H.S.A.; then emergency/medium-term savings; then my investment account; and, finally, short-term savings/spending (think monthly expenses). Whatever’s left is what I get to spend. I hit 100 percent of my savings goals, and I don’t have to think about it once.

Decrease your mindless spending

Just like cutting back on lattes, this a regular piece of advice we hear about all the time — but this one is a little more grounded in reality.As more of the services we regularly use become subscription-based — especially given the flood of streaming TV services — it’s more than worth your time to prune your subscriptions. One analysis by the online budget tool Mint found that in 2019, we each spent $640 on digital subscriptions.That is so much money!You’re probably not going to cut all of them, but it’s very likely there are a few subscriptions you completely forgot about (I did this last month and discovered I had two subscriptions I didn’t know I had).Instructions to find and cut your subscriptions on many devices and services can be found here, but also go through your bank account and look for recurring expenses. You might find something you didn’t even know to look for.

Switch to a high-yield savings account

This one is very simple, and it’ll take you all of 15 minutes.First, open a savings account at a bank that offers an annual percentage yield of at least 1.6 percent or higher — this is the amount of interest the bank will pay you just for keeping your money with them. I’d recommend the online banks Ally or Marcus, both of which I use.Next, transfer your current savings account to it. This is your new savings account.That’s it! You’re done!We did this because regular savings accounts offer a small fraction of the A.P.Y. you get from a high-yield account. For example: A Chase savings account today offers 0.01 percent, while a Marcus account offers 1.7 percent. At those rates, if you had $500 in savings in each account and didn’t contribute any more, at the end of five years you’d have $500.25 in your Chase account and $544.36 in your Marcus account. It’s not a fortune, but it’s worth 15 minutes of your time today. (That’s the magic of compound interest.)What are your finance goals for 2020? Tell me on Twiter @timherrera.Thanks, have a great week!— TimTip of the WeekThis week I’ve invited Kristin Wong, author of the personal finance book “Get Money” and friend of S.L., to give us some tips on being better at money.Give money some meaningPersonal finance is more about behavior than it is math, and it’s much easier to stick to a money habit when that habit is attached to a larger, more meaningful goal. If you haven’t already, clarify the real purpose of your money resolution. Ask yourself why, exactly, you want to save more of your paycheck or cut back on restaurants.Break it downLet’s say you want to stop spending money on restaurants, clothing, gadgets and books this year. That is simply too many things to resist!It’s much easier to focus on one area at a time. For example, this month focus on decreasing your restaurant spending. Once that’s under control, spend the next month focused on cutting back on gadgets, then clothing and so on. One thing at a time; one month at a time.Don’t beat yourself upI don’t know about you, but when I destroy my budget or fail at a savings goal, this is what usually happens:1. Get angry at myself for not being smarter with money2. Shrug and buy everything in my Amazon cartDwelling on your slip-ups makes you more likely to repeat them. So the smarter move is to forgive yourself, recalibrate your budget and your goal, and move on. Read the full article

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bellyofkorea · 7 years ago

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A brief history of being poor and budget and trip planning

Something I’ve wanted to touch on and feel like I never hear talked about directly is budgeting for trips like the one I’m on right now.

Before I left for this trip and before I had even discussed the possibility of doing something like this - I had watched from afar as people I knew from college or high school went on their own adventures abroad. I would look on in jealousy and awe - How did they afford everything? How did they make it all happen without having some program organize it for them or without having some excess in cash to pay for everything?

And here is what I have discovered - this type of trip actually does not cost as much as you would expect. In fact, per month, Chris and I have spent less than I was paying monthly in rent in NYC.

Here is how I’ve done what I’ve done - with a brief and yet transparent look at how poor I’ve been.

I have worked, for the past 5 years, as an extremely underpaid chef in NYC. This means that, at my lowest I was a salaried employee being paid about $400 a week (aka, no overtime so that was just the amount I made every week regardless of the fact that I would work 70 or 80 hour weeks. I also did not have health insurance or any help with travel expenses). At my highest I was being paid roughly $800 a week as a salaried employee (but at this job I never had to work overtime - I was also given benefits of health insurance and travel expense coverage). I’m not embarrassed or shy about sharing my salary - I think one of the biggest flaws of this industry is the shame it brings with the pay cooks are given. One of my jobs would tell us outright to not discuss our salary with anyone. We later discovered they said this because we were all being paid at extremely different rates. At the time I was paid $11.50 an hour, but my coworkers were paid at $11, $10, $10.50, and, horribly, $9 an hour.

Now, to add more context - I have paid some pretty wildly different monthly rents while living in NYC. My most expensive apartment, my last, was located in the southern reaches of Park Slope and cost $950 (and my roommate/friend Britta had even cut me a little slack and let me pay less than the room actually cost).

My least expensive apartment was $650 and that was because I shared it with a couple. Once they moved out, my apartment jumped to being $900. At one point I didn’t even have a roommate living with me and, while I did have someone who paid money to hold the room for him, eventually I had to front and cover the cost of a two bedroom $1800 apartment on my own. I also paid $735 for a three bedroom apartment in Ditmas Park - a Brooklyn neighborhood famous for victorian houses, a suburban feel, and being way the fuck out there.

The rent in NYC includes cost of heat and water, but everything else is a separate burden. ConEd electric bills could be as low as $40 to as high as $100, depending on who was living in the apartment. Gas was usually pretty low, hovering below the $20 range. Internet can be pretty high, but I think on average I never paid more than $60 a month. I also usually split any apartment needs like toiletries and kitchenware, probably about $20 a month.

All this is to say that I was literally living paycheck to paycheck for a vast majority of my life living in NYC. A lot of my meal expenses were covered by the restaurants I worked in because I would typically work from morning to evening. Again, at my lowest, I just wouldn’t eat if I wasn’t at work to avoid the extra cost of groceries. I would package up any family meal left overs or I would just be hungry until my next shift.

And, in some ways I wasn’t really ready to travel. I was sucked into this world where I was living every day, every moment, with my coworkers. I felt like I was on a completely different planet - a completely different universe from that of my friends, boyfriend, and family. No one could understand the struggle of being so underpaid, hungry, and tired. Every day was a caffeine induced mania of working. It was just another way in which it felt impossible to imagine getting out of the cycle of work, paycheck, rent, work, paycheck, rent.

In a lot of ways, traveling abroad seemed like a pipe dream. I could afford small excursions to Vermont (unpaid) or short trips for weddings across the country. New York City, felt like it had trapped me. I could even imagine trying to move out of this expensive city because how would I even get the money to move?

I lucked out with my last job in NYC. I was pretty comfortably paid and I had an excellent, understanding, supportive boss who constantly vouched for me and pushed for me to get raises. This, in many ways, was how I got my leg up in life.

But, the real trick here, is that once I knew that I wanted to go on this trip to Korea, Japan, and Thailand, I immediately began making changes in my lifestyle. Every paycheck I would set aside nearly half of my earning into my savings account. I wasn’t really eating super well, but this time it wasn’t because I couldn’t afford it, but because I had the vision of travel guiding me to not eat out as much and to try to limit myself to meals at work where the food was free.

And what worked for me, probably won’t work for everyone. Once I knew what I wanted to do, I just kept reminding myself that every last dollar would eventually be better spent once I was traveling. It made it easy to pass up on drinks or dinner with friends.

The other trick - I bought everything expensive early and the minute that I had enough money to afford it. Chris and I bought our tickets to Korea after watching ticket prices for a few weeks, but as soon as possible - I think we did it 4 months in advance. My round trip flight was $700.

Additionally, we bought all our other flights and started booking all our accommodation early. This means that, as I’m writing this, I have paid for 5 months work of “rent” and travel costs. All of which has cost me about $3,000. That’s everything - plane tickets and accommodation - from September to January 16th. The only other costs we have left to worry about are food and daily travel such as subways and buses.

By buying the big stuff first, I’ve been able to visualize and properly budget out how to spend on the smaller stuff. It also means that we got the cheapest deals by booking everything so early. And, the best part is that having planned so much in advance has allowed me to relax a little and not feel so anxious or out of my element in such an unfamiliar environment. At the end of the day I know where I’m resting my head and I know how I’m getting there.

I don’t know if this method works or if it is necessarily the best way to go about doing it. What I’m trying to say and illustrate is that I managed to do all this, pay for all of this myself, by simply prioritizing where my money was going and by buying the big stuff early. And making a spread sheet, haha.

I, on the lowly salary of a NYC chef, was able to make this 5 month trip happen. And I feel like if that doesn’t inspire someone to start saving for their next big trip, then I don’t know what else will.

I think I should add - one reason this worked out for me was that I was able to live in my uncles apartment for free for the first three weeks. Additionally, I wasn’t nearly as underpaid at my last job, but I did end up having some ridiculous issues with money because they completely screwed up my taxes (and didn’t take a lot of them out for some reason) so I had to pay a ton of money in taxes while simultaneously funding this trip.

Anyway, I said I would write about Busan but I had been thinking about writing this post for a couple weeks now. Again, I had always wanted to hear how someone was funding their trip and how they did it. So that’s how I’m doing it. Here is an embarrassing photo of me on my last day in NYC.

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