#I used my electric generator to make this cuz my powers out atm

[dragonpyre]

Katie the goon takes her duties very seriously

[spooky-activity]

Just a little update on Cassandratopia 2: Electric Boogaloo (Or as it stands in my Google Docs folder rn, A Helping Hand). I’ll put it under the cut cuz it’s kinda long. 

I just wanted to say that I’m still planning on actually doing it, despite all evidence to the contrary lol 

I did Cassandratopia in a haze of graduating from college(where I was studying animation) and just having ended my first dnd campaign as a dungeon master (which went 3 years!). I was fishing around for internships, but since the pandemic had just kicked off I wasn’t having much luck. So I had a lot of creative energy that wasn’t getting channeled anywhere, and a lot of free time when I wasn’t applying to places. Which is how I did 4 pages a day several times per week. Which was insane. 

As it stands, I’m running 2 dnd campaigns(one meets weekly, the other every other week or so), and just scored a full-time internship at a video game company! The campaigns I’m running are a homebrew open world, which, for those of you who aren’t too familiar with dnd, is a metric fuckton of work to prep for each session because I have no idea what my insane friends and siblings are going to try and do every time we play. 

Anyways all this to say that my storytelling itch is kinda. Sufficiently getting scratched atm and I have a lot less free time. I’m still plucking away at the setting/refining the story of A Helping Hand, but it’s largely on the backburner. Cassandratopia was also, uh, like the first story I’ve ever told in any sort of format besides the give-and-take of dnd, so... I’m not used to having so much control over the narrative. Oddly. I’ve never thought of myself as much of a writer of stories; my main focus is character animation, so someone else is usually writing the stories I’m telling anyways, which is super cool with me. Honestly I’m surprising myself with how much I want to tell this story, which is why I’m still sure I’m doing it. Just. Slower. Than Cassandratopia got done. 

But I’ll share a bit of the lore I’ve been cooking up! Specifically about Zhan Tiri and The Drops. The story will be told in an extremely dnd type setting, because that’s the kind of narrative I’ve told before and am comfortable telling: hard magic rules, neat fights, scary monsters, a dash of eldritch horror, and huge emphasis being put on magical artifacts(kinda like in the show!). Here’s some stuff that’s basically locked-in. 

Zhan Tiri

Zhan Tiri is one of the many Demon Lords of the Abyss. She’s kind of a mashup of two of my favorite Demon Lords, Zuggtmoy, the Lady of Rot and Decay, and Pale Night, the Mother of Demons and Queen of the Night(with just a dash of Hannibal Lecter because who doesn’t like helpful, polite, manipulative-ass bitches lksjflkja;fj). Her domain sits almost exactly between the Sundrop and Moonstone, largely being the new growth that comes from death, and the endless cycle of life and death. Places where her influence is strongest includes the cracks in... Well anywhere really, from society to the planet’s shell, where metaphorical or physical rot could grow; musty, mostly ignored places where something could fester. Iconography related to her would include endless mazes, fungi, grasping skeletal hands, and rotting/blooming corpses. Her spores can animate corpses, which she likes to use as mindless minions when she doesn’t feel like sending one of her Acolytes. She shares a scrap of her power with those few mortals she likes. She appreciates ambition and the desire to Grow to be bigger than what you were to start with, as those are qualities she herself possesses. 

Incredibly intelligent and merciless to those she deems her enemies, her main thing is pulling the strings from the shadows and seeing just how far she can push people to act with as little prompting from her as possible. She does, however, have the power to kinda bulldoze her way through things if she needs to, but she doesn’t like to because where’s the fun in that? 

She first gained interest in the Material Plane when a Wizard with too much hubris from said Material Plane(Named Demanitus) contacted her trying to figure out more information about The Drops and how to control them. After indulging him for a bit, she started preparing to make a summer home on the Material Plane because it’s New and Fun here and Wow These Mortals are Really Fun to Mess With! And some of them she even genuinely liked! Demanitus then realized his mistake and locked her away in Pandemonium for what he hoped was forever, but turned out to be only around 1,000 years, due to the efforts of her followers. Her little stint in Pandemonium magnified the more... Chaotic aspects of her personality, so now she wants to cover the Material Plane in blooming mazes of fungal crops that she can break people with at her leisure. 

The Drops

The drops are two semi-sentient pieces of one original artifact, whose original purpose was to be a tool of creation for the gods. Which, through some great calamity(still deciding that one), got sundered and settled into the two basic aspects of creation: the nearly unlimited well of life-energy which organizes stardust into planets, cabbages, and kings, and the “you gotta crack a few eggs to get an omlette” destructive force which breaks down what the sundrop makes so that it can make more. 

The main goal of the drops is to reunite. I would want to as well if I was ripped in half! This manifests as a... General tug in the direction of the other drop. A desire in the host to Go That Way. It can be resisted, and even ignored for a bit, but it’s always there. Like being hungry if starving wasn’t a danger. Just a bit uncomfortable if you aren’t going That Way, but ignorable. 

Both drops generally try to be as helpful to their wielder as possible, as originally they were a tool of creation to the gods. They are innately obliging. They’re also REALLY UNSAFE FOR MORTALS TO BE MESSING WITH. The Sundrop is a little safer because the most it can do is kinda. Overcharge you into something distinctly not human but still alive, and King Fredrick was lucky he made the Sundrop into soup before giving it to Arianna. But King Edmund got his wholeass arm blasted off for touching the Moonstone. 

The Sundrop

Best I could whittle it down, the Sundrop has power over life energy, like the sun’s light. It also has power over the energy derived from geothermal activities, so deep sea creatures Are Not Immune To The Sundrop, which was a funny thought that crossed my mind that they could be, but that will likely never come up anyways salkdjf;ljsf It is, in its basest form, Growth and Progress. 

It’s a little sentient, but very much entrenches itself into whoever is holding it at the time. Like another mind looking through your eyes and seeing what you see/feeling what you feel while still retaining a bit of individuality from the host. It’s not... Parasitic because it’s in its nature to give, but it’s generally pretty firmly attached to whoever is holding it until they die( which isn’t usually for a WHILE. It ’infects’ a new host when one dies, usually a plant near their grave...) or until a solar eclipse. It wants what they want, but it’s very fussy so they have to ask it for power exactly correctly(like singing an incantation every time you want to heal someone, or doing a Ritual involving lots of very specific ingredients, Celestial Alignments, and Secret Words) or it won’t listen, like an orchid dying if the ph balance is off in the soil by a little bit. But it’s generally pretty intuitive to use, because it wants what you want and (as long as you ask right) is willing to help. 

Anyways basically under the influence of the Sundrop you get a few things: 

Basically limitless energy coursing through your body while you’re in a place with sunlight, which equates to rapid healing, mostly, because every cell in your body is being supercharged with free energy. Never getting exhausted in direct sunlight. (If Rapunzel lived in a place that was sunny 24/7 like near one of the poles she wouldn’t have to sleep like. until it started to get dark in the opposite half of the year. Then she’d have to sleep like a regular human being)

You stay at your prime, or if you are past it, revert to your prime. Someone who is holding the Sundrop, or who has regular access to the Sundrop’s magic can’t die of old age or illness. They have to be hurt beyond the Sundrop’s ability to heal or have it taken away from them. 

The ability to share this rapid healing with others (if you ask right)

The ability to freely draw on the raw, near-limitless energy of the sun to shape into things like cool-looking energy blasts (only if you ask right) 

The Moonstone

The moonstone has powers over varying levels of destruction: from destroying things by ripping them apart/ to Not Letting Things Be Destroyed(also known as protecting) by freezing them in indestructible rock. Like the moon, it can ‘reflect’ a bit of the sundrop’s power, so it can kinda provide energy, albeit a lot less than the sundrop can provide. It’s the inevitable march of The End of All Things, fertilizing the fields of time with the ashes of the old so the new can take root. 

The Moonstone is a bit more in the dark(pun intended hehe) when it comes to bonding with someone, it can only try to figure out what is going on based off the emotions of its wielder, and through anything directly touching the Black Rocks. Because of this it’s... Kinda dumb? It tries to do things to help(Like shooting red fear-rocks to try and scare away whatever must be scaring its wielder so badly) but often fails spectacularly at helping. 

Under the influence of the Moonstone you get: 

Mortals get Neat Body Armor that’s actually just you being turned into a rock! They are very fragile! They need to be protected! The best the Moonstone can do to try and preserve you is to Stop All Destruction by.. Pausing all bodily functions indefinitely. Rocks don’t need to eat, sleep, or breathe, and almost nothing can destroy you if you’re solid Black Rock. The weak reflection of the Sundrop’s energy keeps the host animated, but they’re not exactly alive anymore. Like cryostasis. Wounds (if any) acquired in this state won’t be a problem because they’re not messing anything up, because nothing is technically working in the first place, but they will be a problem when you’re not protected in this way anymore. It’s a cosmic ‘I’ll deal with that later’ button, essentially. 

Like the moon, the Moonstone can reflect the light of the sun. It uses its rock crystals to do so, which can even split the sun’s power into different shades, like a prism. Essentially, different colored rocks can mean new and exciting power sets. 

Blue Lightning! The Moonstone can reflect the Sundrop’s power, so it also has access to pure bursts of energy, even if it is weaker and colder. 

The Moonstone is very helpful, but usually has no idea what you want. ‘Asking’ the Moonstone for more control over its power in the same way you would Ask the Sundrop for more power reminds it of the perfect bond it used to share. The Moonstone’s incantation deepens the bond between wielder and Moonstone in such a way that it actually knows what you want from it, giving you near perfect control of its powers.

*This is kind of just a side note of the Drops: While the Moonstone is weaker than the Sundrop in an head-on fight, it could hold its own if it were on the defensive. Redirecting the power instead of trying to overpower and such.

** Cass made of rocks means I get to draw her skeleton :) not in every picture that would be fucking nuts and way too much work alskjdf;lkjs;fv

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

i had an idea while i was playing aurelia bc of her custom loads skill (the one where its a cycle of elements while you’re aiming with ur sniper)

so there are five elements excluding slag in the BL universe atm

Corrosive

Cryo

Explosive

Shock

Incendiary

and in BL3 Nuclear has been confirmed right so that makes 6 on the dot

slag is due to the Eridium refinement process so imma put that one to the side for now cuz Sirens can use raw Eridium to get better superpowers

so what if each Siren has an elemental affinity like Lilith, who is strongly associated with fire in BL2 

Maya would probably have corrosive considering her corrosive cloud skill plus I could totally see her having glowing light green tattoos, though light blue and or yellow for explosive would also work... actually yellow would prob fit her design best and it’d be really funny if the lady who captures everything in a bubble had the power to blow shit up too

Angel I thought would have had a shock affinity, but now I’m thinking Amara will have that too since she has a huge electricity flourish when she summons her arms, though I imagine they won’t stick Amara with only 1 element until she’s an NPC though like they did to Lilith. Angel having electricity would kinda make sense since their tattoos are already blue so the lighter version of blue is white (that also might be a vvvv light blue, idfk) and her tattoos glow that color until she die 🤔

i have a point here i promise

so if each siren has a custom element for their skills that would explain their tattoos glowing a certain color after they absorb Eridium (or use their Eridium boosted powers i guess, its not really clear tbh)

might also explain why Lilith’s tattoos glow pink/purple when she’s interacting with the Vault Key since ‘slag’ (i guess eridium in general) wouldn’t be a specialized element, all the Sirens would be able to interact ya feel me

anyway my point is

i really hope one of the calypso twins has the nuclear element affinity and that’s how they’re trying to give their followers superpowers, by irradiating the shit out of them

i think that’d be fuckin hilarious

i just really wanna know the context of this fuckin wall art y’all and the crumbly magma eridium boys. i guess if troy has lilith’s power he just smote them so hard they turned to volcanic ash (smote?? why is it smote??? oh my god) but that wouldn’t explain the eridium purple bits.

uhhh i had more about the Vaults and the key all being different colors according to the Vault its gonna open and stuff but ah i kinda forgot it tbh. be cool if every vault had a different color/element, looks to be the case for (one of?) the new Vault(s), looks like red is its color. also looks like the twins already opened it which, smh lads don’t open the Vaults its in the broadcast

tbh it would be cool if opening the red Vault spread a disease that started turning people into rocks and Troy contracted it on his right arm and they had to chop that bad boy off to stop it from spreading. or they thought they stopped it from spreading

dun dun dun

dunnnnnnnn (hello tyreen)

its different from this shot, i did check 

actually the lower left tattoo (3rd one down from the circle with the dot in the middle) is slightly different in the above shot, its supposed to curve upwards away from the 2nd mark with the thin outline but it curves downwards

the fuck is up with that

maybe its just a side effect from them stealing Siren tattoos??

orrrrr its some other weird shit and he’s dying and tyreen is giving him more powers to fight it

there’s hundreds of possibilities! HUNDREDS

also y’all notice the similarities btwn the design of Cryo and Lava rocks in TPS (and 2 with the Warrior) and Eridian ruins? I thought that was n e a t o perhapeth they had found a way to turn electricity into stone

first Vault on Pandora with the blue markings

cryo rocks

lava rocks (but actually this looks like troy’s tattoos on his sicc arm lmfao)

this would be slag? in rocks?? Eridium??? like  

the rocky boys again for reference, they look a bit different...

this is taken from inside the Traveler, so a bit more structured but still 100% purple

the warrior for lols

the traveler, another eridian construct, WHOSE MARKINGS TURN PURPLE WHEN IT USES ITS POWERS

it normally looks like this

and when its charging up its power

its tattoos markings do glow rainbow colors

green for reference

reddish???

i just think they’re neat :)

anyway i just had an addition to my the twins are related to Atlas theory pop up so i gotta go add stuff onto that. sorry for the pic spam lmao

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #197

“she wraps those hands around that pole, she licks those lips and off we go, she takes it off nice and slow ‘cuz that’s porn star dancin’.”

Do you wear something on your left hand/wrist/arm without fail? I have a ring on my left thumb. What is the latest you’ve stayed up for? Why? Oh idk, if you mean staying up waiting for something in particular and not just staying up all night for the hell of it. I think WoW's Warlords of Draenor expansion launch was the latest; it was sometime at night, between midnight and 3 A.M., and. Between me, Jason, Amanda, and Jacob, I by far stayed up the latest and pretty much died that day asleep. What is an article of clothing you would never ever wear? Rompers are just a no for me. What is something you lie to yourself about? I don't really do that anymore. If I know the truth deep down, lying would do me no good. Do you enjoy solving problems? NO. All problems do is stress me out. Are you more books smart, street smart, or random trivia smart? Oh, totally trivia. GMM taught me the most pointless shit. Are you a kinesthetic, an auditory or a visual learner? Kinesthetic. Would you ever take part in a TV quiz show? If so, which one? If not, why? No; I don't want my ugly ass on TV, the stress would murder me, plus I'd be really nervous and awkward. Does it take a lot for you to cry, or does it happen easily? It is VERY easy to make me cry. Do you have two of the same pair of pants? I believe I do. Who gives the best advice? Sara. She neeeeeds to do something in the psychological field. Do you have a lot of pictures of you and your friends? Old ones. I pretty much never take any now because 1.) I hate my face and 2.) what friends? What’s the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make? Truly and entirely letting Jason go. Who do you usually see in your dreams? Sara, my parents, sisters, and my theory is the lingering effects of PTSD keep Jason as a pretty regular fixture. HA HA OH YEAH MARK IS ALSO IN THEM SOMETIMES. Generally though, I don't remember my dreams. When was the last time you cleaned out a bathtub? Literally never. Never been a chore. Would you rather read poetry or write poetry? Write. Have you ever had any really infected injuries? Not really infected, I think. That cyst was, but that's not really an "injury." Is there any band out there that you like every song by them? No. Have you ever cussed/swore in front of younger children? If so, did they eventually imitate what you said? I'm sure I have with legit babies, but even then, I would try avoiding it. Now, I'm super careful around any aged child, and no. Do you have any friends that you almost always joke around with? Alex and Chelsea. Serious moments are almost non-existent, especially with Alex. Have you learned any new words today? No. If your hair never got greasy again, would you still wash it? Well yeah, it would still get dirty. When was the last time you played jump rope? Not since being a young teen... Talk about your first love. I think everyone in my online circle knows the story. High school sweethearts, strong and steady relationship that pretty much everyone thought was permanent, but ended very abruptly. Know now that it's for the better it ended; who the hell knows, maybe I'd still be an extremely depressed and hopeless mess. What’s the most beautiful songs you’ve ever heard in your opinion? "The Two Trees" and "Dante's Prayer," both by Loreena McKennitt, are unreal. "Obstacles" by Syd Matters? Goosebumps every single time. Okay really I could go on forever. What kind of self care is your favorite to do? I get the most satisfaction out of skin care. Are you affectionate? With s/os. I'm a hugger if I know you well enough. Who do you look up to? Mark, Steve Irwin, I look up to some parts of Otep Shamaya despite her mostly being a bitch, Sara, and there's so many more, but I'm blanking atm. Do you do art? Using what (pencil, watercolor, etc)? Usually a mechanical and colored pencils. Do you dance? What style of dance? Not anymore. Favorite old film? A lot. But probably Johnny Got His Gun. What weather is the most beautiful, in your opinion? Snowy. Do you have a lucky number? No. Have you ever wished on a star? What about on a fallen eyelash? No. What’s the most beautiful thing in life, In your opinion? People coming together for good, despite any differences or grudges. What instrumental sound is your favorite? Violin, electric guitar, or piano. What’s the best song a friend has ever introduced to you? Ohhhh idk. "Wolf In Sheep's Clothing" is high on the list, thanks Sara. Favorite shoe you own? Some converse with a skull design. Do you know any German words? Yeah, but I've forgotten quite a lot. Four semesters of German have definitely faded a bit. Do you have a passport? No. Do you say any words that are pretty specific to your area? Well, "y'all' for one. There's definitely sayings, though I'm not gonna sit here trying to remember 'em considering I don't use much, if any. Do you know anyone who everyone thinks is gay, but is not out? No. Vegetables: better raw or cooked? Are there any raw veggies I like??? Have you ever smoked? No. Would you mind dating someone significantly shorter than you? I've said it before and I'll say it again: I have a significantly negative opinion of you if h e i g h t fucking matters to you. Can you quote the movie Mean Girls? All I know off the top of my head is I think "On Wednesdays, we wear pink" or something like that. Do you live in the state you were born in? Yeah. Do your parents smoke? Dad does. Do you know anyone who has a ton of real fur clothes? No; at least I fucking hope not. If Britney Spears came to your town, would you go see her concert? In the hypothetical case of it being free, sure thing. I wouldn't actually go out of my way buying tickets. Have you ever worn a pair of leather (fake or real) pants? No. If the last person you kissed asked you to marry them, what would you do? She wouldn't ask that anytime soon. I'd only be comfortable being engaged if we were settled somewhere and the relationship was in a perfectly healthy place. When you believe in the Easter Bunny, what did you think it looked like? I don't remember. What about the tooth fairy? I think I imagined something like Tinker Bell? Do you/did you have a religion class in school? No. If your best friend got cancer, would you shave your head with them? If she was truly self-conscious of it, I probably would. Name someone you know who is Buddhist. No one, I think. Does your mom wear makeup? Very little for only special occasions. Do you kiss your boyfriends/girlfriends in front of your parents? Yes. Have you ever spent Christmas alone? No, thank Christ. Have you ever spent your birthday alone? Not all day or anything. Does your favorite uncle have any children? I only know one of my uncles well enough to have a confident opinion on him, but anyway, yes. Has anyone ever kissed you when you were so not expecting it? Possibly? Was it a good surprise kiss? Or bad? See above; I'm not sure if I was ever totally taken by surprise. Name all the members (first, middle and last names) from your favorite band. Man, I used to know this shit 100%, but I only know now Ozzy himself. Do you still have any Pokemon cards? I don't believe so. What would you do if your favorite artist came to town but your parents wouldn’t let you go? i'm???????? about to be 23????????? Do you know anyone who refuses to swear? Probably. Not anybody I know well. Have you ever heard a young child swear? Yes. Have you ever heard your grandparents swear? My grandma, yeah. But she does so seldom. What do you see when you turn your head to the right? My closet. The creepiest, most disgusting insect in the world is: Hissing cockroaches omfg no. What is your opinion on sex without emotional commitment? No. Where’s the best place to eat a romantic dinner? Olive Garden is the answer to everything. What will you dress up as for Halloween? Idk, but I reeeaaally wanna do something this year. Have you ever been in a lighthouse? No. Do you ever make your own surveys? Not exactly; I only combine them and usually delete the "no shit," boring, overused, or incredibly specific questions, like, "does the # 79 mean anything to you." What color is your shower? White. When is the last time you had a serious talk with someone? Yesterday about Bentley. I think Mom finally sees we need to get rid of him. How often do you take naps? Sometimes every day, every other, or just sporadically that week. I generally function better and am in a better mood with an afternoon nap. I know you don’t wanna talk about it, but when do you go back to school? Who the fuck even knows with my piece of shit past school. I was planning to this month. Do you find that you have a certain meal you eat every time you go to certain restaurants? In like... *every* restaurant. I don't want to order something I wind up hating. Have you ever had anything stolen from you? Maybe? When was the last time the power went out at your house and how long was it out for? Not too long ago I believe thanks to the wind. Just briefly. Ever had to get any stitches? Twice. How many times a year do you go out of state? Usually not even once a year, though now with Sara, it'll probably become a regular pattern of twice or so. About how many times during the night do you wake up from your sleep? Always, always, at least once. What kind of surveys do you wish there were more of? The deep, philosophical ones. When are you getting your next new phone? Ugh, probably not soon, though I need one desperately. Are you due for a haircut? No, got that done yesterday. Are you dealing with any health-related problems right now? Mental, we already know, but I've got some physical too currently. Do your parents like the music you listen to? Some of it, but I know Mom's not into the heavier stuff I like, and usually not the more indie stuff I'm into it. Do your parents approve of your beliefs? Dad, I don't think we agree on most, and Mom, she does some, while not others. She'd probably punch me if she learned I'm pro-choice now. Do you know anyone who’s racist? Very. What about a homophobe? Welcome to good 'ole North Carolina, my friend. What about a pedophile? They wouldn't be alive if I knew a pedophile. Who’s the most annoying person in your neighborhood? I dunno who, but there's one person on our street that has loud music playing almost constantly, even at night. You can't hear it indoors and it's not blaring outside, but I find it disrespectful to the few people who live here, especially at night. And mind you, the music sometimes isn't friendly to be playing where all of us can hear it. Name one of your psycho exes? No one. Why were they a psycho ex? N/A What’s the best revenge you ever got on someone? I don't see it as bitter "revenge" anymore, but it's chuckle-worthy every now and again to remember he broke up with me due to depression, and now I beat that shit and am working hard to stand on my own. How often do you shop at dollar stores? Only for candy for like, going to the movie theater. What’s your favorite part of a song? Usually riffs, choruses, or bridges... or guitar solos... lol idk it just depends on the song. I'd say maybe bridges the most. In school, do you/did you work better by yourself or in a group? BY MYSELF. When is the last time you ordered from a catalog? I personally never have. What’s the name of the gas station you last stopped at? Idr, it wasn't one we normally stop at 'cuz we were out of town. Is there a piece of jewelry that holds any sentimental value to you? Yeah. What was the first song you heard today? I think I listened to "Kreuzfeuer" by Powerwolf. What was the last video you watched on YouTube? Jonathan Young's cover of "Riot" by 3DG. Someone sign this man, please. Could you design an whole web page yourself? Ha, no. That stuff confuses the shit outta me. Have you ever cooked an entire dinner for your family? No. Who do you tend to get in fights with the most? My mom. Can you say today’s date in a different language? Took me a moment, but in German, yes. Does it bother you if the shower nozzle thing isn’t straight? Yes. Ours won't stay straight for anything. What is the reason you keep waking up every day? Do you have someone or something you particularly live for? Who or what is your inspiration? I want to build a future I'm proud of and enjoy each day more than ever. My history is my inspiration in the sense it's shown me what "low" truly can be and that I can climb out of that hole and to the top of the mountain one day. How would you spend your last night on earth? Would you be by yourself or with friends? Would you do something you never had the courage to do before? I'd want to be with all my loved ones that day, but just with Sara that night. I would tell her how much I love her through all words and actions I possibly could, and if that included something I hadn't had the courage for previously, yes. Do you honestly believe that your relationship (or a future relationship, if you don’t currently have one) will last until the end? How far would you be willing to go for that person? I genuinely think it will, very sincerely. I'd do a hell of a lot for her, but I'm smart enough now to know there has to be a limit. What do you think is the one thing about you that catches everyone’s attention? Are you naturally loud? Or do you make sure you have an eye-catching appearance? I'm very quiet. How would you show someone you loved them, without outright saying, “I love you?” How would you show it through actions? I mean, there's a whole lot you could do. I think the best way is just doing little things that show love. Go make that person their morning coffee, that kinda stuff. What would you do if someone cheated on you? Has that ever happened? Have you cheated on anyone? It's over; no; no. Are you outgoing or shy? I'm shy as hell. Who are you looking forward to seeing? Sara on the 4th. Are you easy to get along with? I think. What kind of people are you attracted to? The unorthodox but friendly ones. The "weirdos," so long it's not in a like, creepy way. People who are very open-minded. Do you still talk to your first crush? No. Do you like bubble baths? I don’t take baths. What are your bad habits? Procrastinating more than anything else, I peel my nails instead of trimming them oops, I weigh myself every single day, I jump to conclusions and catastrophize, I drink soda regularly, I'm very impulsive when incredibly upset, uh... HOW AM I BLANKING HERE ALREADY?????????????????? I have so many. Where would you like to travel? South Africa for the KMP, Tanzania for the Serengeti, Scotland, Japan, Germany, Canada would be cool... man, so many places. Favorite part of your daily routine? Mark video. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? My stomach. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Idc. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? No, but then again I've been the one broken up with only once. What do you say during awkward silences? Feel like puking and disappearing both. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? No. Ever won a competition? For what? Yeah. 4th/5th grade D.A.R.E. report, some online one for two rare Silent Hill: Revelation pieces, my clogging class when I was in high school won some high rank at a competition, and I believe I've won in one or two other writing things? Been suspended/expelled? For what? No. Been arrested? For what? No. Craving something? What? I have a mad craving for Hardee's chicken tenders, good Lord. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? A stuffed snake from Sara named Plum. :') How many stuffed animals do you think you have? I could not even TRY to guess. I was obsessed with stuffed animals as a kid (I even got teased now and again for occasionally bringing one to elementary school), and so many I have hold deep sentimental value. They're stored in bags in the attic. They're probably gonna end up going to my nieces and nephew, or by if some miraculous change of heart, I want kids. Favorite character from Mean Girls? I couldn't name a single one. Favorite character from Finding Nemo? Dory, always. I was obsessed. OBSESSED. With Dory. I'm not kidding when I say I wanted to change my real name to Dory. Now in adulthood, Gill is high on my list too, probably #2. In a fight with someone? No. Do you tan a lot? Never. Have you ever been on a horse? Yes. I want to legitimately ride one one day, not just at a carnival and such. Are you a vegetarian? I wish, but the juncture I was is over. I had to stop for nutrition's sake as well as easier weight loss. After you truly look into the process of killing the animal... it's nauseating, even with the "humane" methods, which are not exactly so. No, I do not shame meat-eaters; we're omnivores and our diet is designed to include meat. It's just I personally wish I wasn't participating in that process by consuming what has been killed so gruesomely. What goal are you aiming for this year? Improving my mental health further is #1. I at the very least want to make considerable progress on my anxiety. Are you currently reading any books at the moment? Not really. I'm like a few pages into The Fault In Our Stars, but I'm not reading it anywhere near regularly. Would you own a Siamese cat? The cat I have now appears to have Siamese heritage! I love the breed, so obviously yes. Have you ever had an ultimate adrenaline rush? Maybe? Idk. Do you like deviled eggs? I absolutely, positively loathe them. I hate yolk. What’s the farthest you’ve walked? Hm, I dunno. Maybe through Disney World as a kid or a trip to the zoo? What is your favorite horror movie? I like both The Blair Witch Projects. Have you ever seen a rooster? Yeah. When are you likely to hide your emotions? When I'm jealous, probably. Which is scarier: Dying of thirst or of starvation? I mean I don't know how either would feel, but probably thirst? I feel like it would be quicker. When you turn on the TV, what channel do you flip to? I don't watch TV. Have you ever tried to help someone quit smoking? I've told Dad especially and Chelsea I wish they'd quit, usually indirectly to avoid feeling mean or rude. I'm 99% convinced it's gonna be lung cancer that kills my dad, and Chels does it way too much, especially with her age. What was the last comment someone made on your music taste? Mom pointed out how I can jump to heavy metal to some random indie stuff in the blink of an eye. Have you ever had to talk anyone out of suicide? I've tried. One in particular was a very close online friend, but I'm pretty sure she went through with it. Who in your family do you act like the most? Mom, I guess? What was the last topic that you ranted about? RANTS WITH SARA ARE THE FUCKING BEST. Probably her, but idr what. Is there someone that makes you feel like you’re walking on eggshells? Not anymore. Have you ever been in a physical fight on school grounds? No. Have you written anything in a bathroom stall? What, if anything? No. Was there ever a time when you wished you’d never been born? Yup. Who is the most sensitive person that you know? Uh, me. Have you ever had a tooth (or teeth) pulled? No. You can have one famous person’s wardrobe; who do you choose, and why? Suzy Hanson is an i c o n. When was the last time you wrote someone a note? Oh idk. It may have been the end of '17 when I sent Jason that final/closure letter. Do you tell your parents before you go somewhere, or just leave? I tell Mom. What was the last thing you tried to get out of doing? Hm. I dunno. If someone makes fun of you, are you able to laugh it off? NOPE. HI AVPD I SEE YOU. When was the last time that you watched the sun come up? Not since that time my sis, her best friend, and I stayed up all night. We went on like two walks and went swimming; my mother woke up very confused lmao. Have you ever (purposely or accidentally) played with someone’s heart? Not to my recollection. Has anyone ever played with yours? I don't believe he did so deliberately as some game. When was the last time someone told you to turn your music down? During a car ride with my mom at some point. I always control the music and yeah, it's a bit too loud sometimes. Are you one to spend a lot of time in the bathroom? No. How many times a day, on average, do you look at the time? I dunno, frequently? It's not as if I'm ever away from the laptop long, and a clock's right there. Do you like the smell of cinnamon? Omg yes. Do you like frogs? Yeah! Are you afraid of dying? Not really. The older I've gotten the more I've become comfortable with it just being a part of life. I sure don't want death to come prematurely, but I still don't really worry about what's after death. I'm fearful of the process, but not it itself. Do you consider yourself politically intelligent? NO. I'm clueless. Hence why I'm neutral on a lot. Do you like pixie sticks? Ye. Do you like French toast? I would die for the perfect French toast probably. Are you good at doing math in your head? No; I can't do even simple math up there. Do you know a lot about history? Definitely not. Name a TV show that you absolutely can’t stand. Rooster Teeth was the first to come to mind. Do you look like your age? I guess. The past two times I've had alcohol at a restaurant I wasn't carded... though that makes me fear I look even older. x_x Do you feel confident in a bathing suit? Fuck no. Have you ever had a concussion? Once. Sucked major dick. Do you like hot tubs? For a little bit. Do you know anyone who is battling cancer? Not currently, at least I think. Have you ever donated money to a charity? Yeah. Do you like the color lime green? Sure. Do you wish you could change something about your hair? Can I dye it already please????? Have you ever gotten a makeover? No. Do you think the minions from Despicable Me are cute? They annoy the fuck outta me. Did you have a Gameboy as a child? Yes; still have it, actually. Have you ever auditioned for a talent competition? No. Do you like the Silent Hill movies? Seeing this question made me so happy asjfjfweowq. The first is good, though I had some complaints about the altering of the plot. I warmed up to it quite a bit with time, though; I was just biased towards the game, which I still do like more. The second is... objectively trash as a plot, all the hell over the place. I think the entire fandom agrees with that. The only things I really enjoyed about it were of course Red Pyramid/Pyramid Head and the carousel scene with Dark Alessa. Tell me something you’ve been made fun of for in the past. I'm always on some type of technology. I fucking hate it. Do you support war? I'm a pacifist. Guess. Do you send messages on Facebook a lot? Nope; if I do it's only ever to Girt, really. Do you use the word “hello” daily? No. Who’s the biggest hugger you know? Idk. Where did you get your worst scar from? I can't see it, but I'm assuming the one from my surgery. Do you like Coco Pebbles the cereal? I used to find them okay, but haven't had 'em in years. Do you stick your tongue out often in pictures? No. Honestly have you ever purchased something, wore it, and then returned it? Maybe? I don't think so, though... I'd feel too bad. At least me now would. Which one of your family members are you closest to? My mom. If chocolate was an illegal drug - would you be a drug addict? I assume you mean it became illegal just the way is/with no new risks to it? In that case, I wouldn't be an addict or go out of my way to get it, but if there was a piece of chocolate easily available to me, yeah, I'd eat it. Would you rather have name brand shoes or name brand clothes? Shoes, because they're obvs. gonna be of better quality and I care about walking comfortably more that "fancy" clothes. Which is worse: onion breath or garlic breath? Oh idk, both are. Ew. When was the last time you got a shot? When I was at the dentist a few months back and they had to fill a cavity, thus I had numbing shots. They had to give me way more than usual, though, which I thought was odd. I just wasn't getting numb enough until like, 6+ in. Are you proud of your parents? I'm very proud of how Dad has developed as a person, and I have immense respect for my mom for how she works her ASS off to keep her kids safe, healthy, and well-provided for. I could never do all she does. Do you say “soda” or “pop”? "Soda." Are you shy about singing in front of people? YES. Which is better: orange or grape soda? Orange; not a fan of grape soda. Who was the last person in your house who isn’t family? Good question.

[nerdwreck]

élin’s eurovision opinions - an essential guide to good taste *ahem*

some people have what in swedish is called ‘vårkänslor’ (literally ‘spring feelings’, could be described as an overall feeling of happiness, relief that winter is over, and/or ‘love is in the air’ kinda thing) in the spring. i on the other hand, i have eurovision feelings. i just neeeeeed to talk about the eurovision with SOMEONE, and since i have barely no friends to talk about the esc, i need to vent a little. so, here are my opinions on this years eurovision contestants, in no particular order (actually in the order they presented them in a panel-program on finnish tv, which i marathoned, because i’m a nerd like that). i excuse my pompousness in advance, call me percy weasley all you like, this is just how i am and how i write 

greece - i’ve generally liked the greek eurovision songs, but this one just doesn’t do it for me. i like the build-up and demy sings very beautifully, but the refrain just sounds like boring regular radio pop, which is okay, but like i said, it does very little for me

moldova - EPIC SAX GUY IS BAAAACK. if one considers only the tune, it’s VERY catchy and a pretty good song, buuut i’m rewatching the video right now, and i’m questioning things. many things... wtf. but the song itself is catchy, i will very likely dance to this, and this will be the resurgence of epic sax guy, if not as fantastical as originally

australia - why are you still here? when did australia become a part of europe? very well, i’ll review your song then. in a year with a lot of ballads and slow songs (yet again), this one is pretty good. but tbh, i forget about it very fast. the song has grown on me since i first heard it. it’s not especially remarkable, but it ain’t bad either

azerbaijan - i like the sound of the song, reminds me a little of t.a.t.u. i don’t have too much else to say about the song. it’s good. but ~something~ is missing. and the grammar disturbs me. and the fact that i keep hearing “ i am skeletor”

cyprys - i always think this is rag’n’bone man’s ‘human’, but no. ‘tis not. the song is, heh, well-constructed and well written, but to me the lyrics just sounds like he’s listing synonyms. and i miss something.. otherwise the song is good. all i say is good... i think need to come up with some synonyms myself...

albania - this song was originally in albanian, but they translated it. it makes me sad. i think this song has great potential, but because it’s in english, it doesn’t get there. i have a soft spot for songs that are sung in the singers native language, so i’m pretty bummed that there are so few of those this year.

iceland - i like this. a lot. it’s stuck in my head very often. i have nothing to complain about. i like the sound, i like svalas voice. it’s one of my faves

latvia -  took me a while to remember what latvia was called in english. not important. the song: it’s my kind of music. i like it a lot. the sound is cool. but now that i see the VERY culturally appropriating fashion in the music video i’m a bit put-off... ummm... I LIKE THE SONG....

georgia - in the panel-show i watched they called this the “worlds worst bond-song”, and i can’t but agree. the lady sings well enough both in the video, and isn’t too bad live either, but it just tries too much

porugal - everyone's’ surprising fave. mine too. portugal has, for as long as they’ve participated in the esc, ONLY sent songs in portuguese, so + + + this man is a human kitten. he is so incredibly cute, and his voice sounds like he’s purring. this song would be perfect in a romantic movie montage, and i’m usually not about that life, but this i looove. salvador, i wanna hug you, is that okay?

sweden - i’m not gonna hold back on this one. i do not like this song one bit. i followed the swedish “semi-finals” (can’t come up with a better word atm) this year (as well) and i liked so many other songs. it’s just so creepy and uuuuughghg. robin competed last year as well, and he was good and sweet and played the harmonica then, and i loved him. while i still want to, TMI, sit on his face, i can’t with this song. it’s on the radio at least twice a day. the song isint bad melody or composing wise, but i hate hate hate it. did i say i hate it?

armenia - this woman looks a lot like ivanka trump. like, A LOT a lot. it is unsetteling. the song has that ~oriental~ sound, and while i like the sound of the song, i can’t get over the not so good lyrics, and the video gives me more of those cultural appropriation vibes... parts of the song are fine, but the rest is forgettable

poland - i didn’t initially like this song, but it has grown on me somewhat. its gone from ‘meh’ to ‘yeeee’. something about this, i don’t know what, gives me twin peaks vibes, twin peaks vibes are almost never bad

belgium - this lady sound like a mix of lorde and birdy. i for one really like both of those women, so this woman, who is 17 btw, is a fave in my book. doesn’t sound so eurovision-y, but i really like it as a song. i will listen to this when it comes on

israel - okay, i guess my opinion on this song has completely changed since i last heard it. then it gave me much to nothing, but now it’s suddenly a lot better. i’m a bit bothered by the very sudden ending, but i guess i will be dancing to this after all

malta - a power ballad that takes a little more place than the others this year. i like a lot of the elements of this song, and as a whole it makes for a very good ballad. not exactly a fave, but i definitely think it better than just ‘good’

hungary - yet another fave. native language, rap, man with beautiful voice, traditional elements, nice sound. only good things. i have absolutely nothing to complain about, i’m just gonna sit here and enjoy the song

danmark - in the verse(s) leading up to the second chorus, this lady sound a lot like philippa soo singing ‘burn’ i hamilton. it’s weird. but yeah, THIS song sounds like a disney end-credit song. this woman sings extremely well, and the song keeps growing on me, and i do not know why

montenegro -  we have arrived. we have arrived at one of my absolute favourite songs of this year. it’s everything a eurovision song should be. this is the new anthem of the gay olympics. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. IT’S GOT EVERYTHING!! space, a fantastically fabulous man with the longest braid ever, it’s so fucking extra and i love it, DISCO AND I LOVE DISCO, trumpets... there’s nothing to hate and sooo muuuch to love. this will be one of the song that i can not not dance to, like ‘footloose’ and ‘shit up and dance’

austria - the category “cute-guy-with-guitar”. couldn’t care less tbh

macedonia - i guess i like this song. i like some parts a little better than others. very radio friendly, and i don’t think i would change station if this came on. would dance, or at least move some limbs

finland - i’m sooo soo sooo happy that i like the song we’ve sent this year. i haven’t really liked a song we’ve sent to the esc since 2014. i liked this song from the first note, and it just keeps getting better. i find it so incredibly beautiful. i’m not even saying that because i’m finnish, i just love this song so much. it gives me ‘secret garden’ feels. i just wish it was longer. i neeed mooore. love love love. plz vote for us :’)

romania - okay, imagine a line. that line is eurovision. at one en of the line, the good end, is montenegro’s song: and absolute pearl, the best of eurovision-ness and weirdness. and on the other side of the line is romanias song: yodel it. no, i will not, but i will laugh at it. it’s so bad i, resentfully, love it. it’s much for my to comprehend. who thought this was a good idea???????

slovenia - nope. nothing. i feel nothing

the netherlands - these ladies are beautiful AND SING HARMONIES?? the parts of the song when there’s just that nice beat and these angelic voices it’s great, but, i never thought i’d say something like this, get the electric guitar out of there. and that weird beat thingy that went into the bridge.. ugh, let the ladies sing goddammit!!

serbia - i feel very little again. i like the latter-middle part. i’m a slut for violins

ireland - this song felt very westlife-y to me at first. this guy’s voice is so androgynous, i’m intrigued. this is also a song that has grown on me immensely. the last minute is absolutely beautiful. i think this has become one of my minor faves as of late

russia -  i know they’re not competing this year, but i thought i’d say some words at least. the song is nothing special, but it’s an okay song in the end

belarus - it’s basically mumford & sons, but sang by a man and a woman, in belarusian. what’s not to love? another fave.

bulgaria - guys, this guy is a 2000′s kid 2000′s kids can compete now... ya feel old yet, ‘cuz i sure do. ah, the song. i like this song, another one that has grown on me a lot. and as i mention earlier, i’m a slut for pretty much any string instrument. and this child sings very beautifully. and the sound is just up my alley

san marino - i’m sorry valentina, i couldn’t care less

switzerland - the song in itself is good, but as i’m watching the video all i do is stare as this beautiful lady, and so are everyone else. it becomes more about the lead singer than the song. YEAH THAT SHOT WAS DEFINITELY DIRECTED AT HER CLEAVAGE. stop. i’m trying to listen to a gooood sooong

norway - i’m sorry norway, no. why? your’e better than this!! i’m not mad, i’m just disappointed

estonia - estonia have sent some pretty good songs these past years, and while this did get better since the last time i listened to it, i’m still a little disappointed. anyone who sings about romeo and juliet will be a little scary to me...

croatia - he’s singing a duet with himself, which i must admit is pretty impressive, but i think this sound like a youtuber singing disney-songs while doing impressions... especially then he sings ‘let it flow’...

lithuania - this song scares me. i know she’s singing in english, but i can’t understan a word she’s saying. one positive thing tho , to me as a finn, is that she looks a lot like little my. the song? i do not like the song.

ukraine - they sound a little like the old linkin park, and that is GREAT. this kinda music is right up my alley. again, only positive things

united kingdom - song is meh, lucie sings sooo welll, she deserves better

france - i don’t want to be that person, but french is very ~seductive~ my humble, finnish, peasant ears. this whole tune is very ~seductive~ to me. i just wish she’d sing it all in french, and not drag that english into this. it just feels wrong, so wrong.. if it was all in french, then yes yes yes, but rn it’s a yes yes no

spain - no. creepy. slimy. take it away from me. but first, i’d like to ask this creepy gentleman if he knows any other english than “do it for your lover”? i cannot stans this song. id rather listen to swedens song tbh, and ya know how much i hated that song

germany - how do they have the ball to send a song that is such blatant plagiarism of ‘titanium’?? i can’t hear anything else that that. this song is ‘titanium’, if you took all the good stuff out of it

italy - this is my absolute fave. i will vote for this. it’s a good song, a beautiful man singing beautifully in italian, it’s full of irony, there’s a guy in a gorilla suit, the guitar at the end sound like old coldplay. i just love everything about this. i have nothing to complain about really. just that if this doesn’t win, i don’t know what i’ll do.

and that is it. i hope i didn’t miss anyone... it took me about 3 hours to write. i think i’m satisfied. i hope someone reads this, or at least bits of it...

the quality of the eurovison songs have gotten a little even imo. a few years ago, there were still a few great songs and the rest were kinda shitty, but now most of the songs are equally good/bad, with a few exceptions. it’s both fun and a bit sad tbh. but, i shouldn’t complain. the eurovision is still eurovison: it’s great fun and an excuse for me to be really over the top with everything.

happy eurovision season, // élin