#I too am into GILFs

[dirtyoldmanhole]

.

[seithr]

i always forget this game updates while i'm gone. its been four years and im fiddling with flight rising again. kind of serving here

[ne0nwithazero]

Someone put my Mike on the Sexypedia, honestly this is the biggest honour and nothing will ever top this, it's been great everyone <3

[koukouture]

listen, am I saying Hassen is hot? Yes. Is he fifty? Also yes. But come on look at him he’s so

Like does he not look like sugar daddy material? He aged WELL god DAMN. I need more lore on him stat Kuro somebody’s gotta translate the rest of the comic chapters KURO GET ON IT I SEE THE MANGA SECTION ON THE MAIN WEBSITE YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO

[devilishdelights]

ITS thirteens bday i frogt....so of course i need to write for her

[saviourkingslut]

is there any indication as to the length of engage yet? like any reviewers say anything about that or are we just supposed to find out whether we're spending 60 euros on max 30 hours or not

[luvsavos]

(AA) (i saw your tags…I know how you feel…take all the time you need…as long as Lord Vordrem didn’t eat my asks/responses or you, they won’t be going anywhere, right? 🙂 maybe write what comes to you and you can connect the dots to it later? I dunno, I’m not a writer 😅) Naas and Shara (and Lady D) seemed to help so i don’t know how you’d feel if i picked 10 for Sir Lokzii (he’s honestly my favorite 👉👈) if not you can just pick the other three Gods. They won’t mind…i hope?

that he has not, evidently he does not have the munchies (right now anyways............. hopefully if he gets them he'll just eat things in whatever game i decide to play again LMAO)

ive got a general idea for the fic, but the actual Doing It is. houghgughg writing hard</3

you are perfectly welcomed to ask for literally any of my ocs, i enjoy talking about any of them<3

oc ask meme! (since you didn't specify for which meme i'm gonna do the one that's easier to answer hdjdhfjg)

10: if they wear jewelry, what kind? do they prefer silver or gold? do they have a favorite gem?

typically, lokzii doesn't wear TOO much jewelry, though in his human form in more "casual" clothing he'll sometimes wear something like a simple metal cuff bracelet (he likes both silver and gold, though typically wears gold jewelry) inlaid with a sapphire (his favourite gem, no surprise). he DOES, however, always wear on him somewhere a pendant that's one of xeno'jiiva's scales---a "living" scale, just like the xeno'jiiva parts on his armour in his human form are. typically this pendant is worn around the neck, resting just above his heart. the scale is emanates a gentle warmth, and is reactive to touch, twitching and offputting soft blue energy in response to it.

[chaos-in-deepspace]

LNDS: Cursed Spice | 18+ NSFW

Aight homies, I almost ran over like four old ladies speeding home on my lunch break to write this. It's cursed. BUt only a little...I don't think it's that bad. This was born from being challenged not directly by @anxiousgoddest so if any of y'all read this at work or in a public place, that's on you and your bad decision making.

Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+. Warnings: Pegging mentioned, Zayne's Sanity™, Sounding mentioned, Biting, Alligator Death Rolls in bed, Xavier is too old for your shit, Simba, Rafayel wants to both laugh and cry, why are you like this situations, Oh SEX that happens a little in this, it's NSFW what did you expect?

Blog Information | Masterlist

Xavier

Xavier was on top...again. One hand trapping both your wrists above your head while he ground his clothed cock against your heat. The only thing separating you two were his thin boxers and your skimpy underwear that you wore for the express purpose of him ripping them off you.

However, you wanted to be on top, and he knew it. You were pouting as you looked up at him and you could see the amused glimmer in his eyes as he continued teasing you.

"Something wrong?" He chuckled, his boyish laugh filling the room and you groaned as he managed to angle his hips just right. The bastard knew he was being unfair. He had been on top every single time this week. You just wanted to ride him, tease him a bit, maybe do a little edging for flavor. He decided otherwise as he continued taking control of your session.

"Lemme top for once, please?" You asked, batting your eyelashes at him, hoping that was all it would take for him to give in.

"If I'm not mistaken, last time you were on top you got tired halfway through and made me take over so you could lay down." He reminded you and you huffed.

"It was one time..." You tried arguing but he rose an eyebrow, "Okay it was a few times, but it's not my fault you have a surprising amount of stamina, okay?"

"Then perhaps we should work on your stamina next?" Xavier said it so nonchalantly and you bit back a remark as his hands snuck to your sides, snapping the elastic of your underwear, "We should start immediately."

He leaned down to press a kiss to your lips, but you had another idea. You went in, biting down on his neck a bit harsher than you normally would. Xavier let out a gasp as his grip on your wrists loosened and you took the opportunity to wrap your limbs around him, your arms and legs locked into place around his neck and torso.

Then you rolled, mouth still clamped on his neck. Xavier let out a groan as he found himself on his back and you sat up triumphantly, looking at the angry bite mark you left on him. You ground your hips down on him and snickered.

"What was that for?" Xavier asked, his hand going to his neck to make sure he wasn't bleeding.

"Classic Alligator Fuckhouse. Gotta keep up, old man." You said, knowing that 99% of people probably wouldn't know what the hell that was.

"A what...that's a thing?"

"It is indeed, and I just did it...successfully might I add."

Xavier sighed before remembered what you said, "You called me an old man."

"You kinda are one, Xav."

"What does it mean if you like this old man?" Oh he was pouting now, how adorable. You just wanted to squish his cheeks...or fuck the shit out of him...perhaps both.

"It means I'm into Gilfs."

Xavier paused, thinking over what you said before sighing, "What am I going to do with you?"

"Love me and fuck me, babe."

Zayne

At this point Zayne was well aware that you had an obsession over his ass. It was unavoidable when you were always making a grab for it. He just never thought you would have...plans like these.

"Please Zayne, I am begging you. Just one time, and if you don't like it we never have to talk about it again." You were pleading, and normally it always worked on him. He had a soft spot for you, after all, and was almost a push over when you requested something. This, however, seemed to be something he wasn't prepared to do...at least not at first.

"I understand you like to be adventurous...but this?" Zayne said as he sat on the couch. His shirt was already tossed to the side and his pants unbuttoned. You had worked hard to get him in the mood before you popped this question. Your hand going teasingly over the bulge in his pants.

"I already have the stuff for it, if you'd let me..." You cooed, trying your hardest to make this seem like it was a good idea on his end. Zayne sighed as he leaned his head back onto the couch.

"Of course you've already bought the necessary items..." You don't know why Zayne seemed to surprised by this with your current track record.

"Lemme just grab them to show you. It won't be that bad, I swear." You said, getting up and running to your room and grabbing a bag filled with everything you'd need. Most items had to be ordered online, so you had literally been planning this for a while. You scurried back to the living room and took out the items.

Zayne paused as he took it all in before he finally spoke, "Why does it look like that?" He said as he pointed at the dildo that was very much not human.

"Oh, I got it off bad dragon. I think this one was called-" You got cut off before you could finish the sentence.

"You bought a large dragon shaped dildo...for me?" Zayne was already feeling the grays peaking through the dark locks of hair on his head.

"I actually measured and it's the same size as you, doctor. If I can handle taking your dick, you can handle taking mine." You said, placing the dildo next to the harness, "Now can I please peg you, I just wanna see that ass jiggle with every thrust. It'll be so hot." You whined.

"That is not going inside me." Zayne finally said.

"But consider if it did." He didn't seem like he wanted to consider the possibility.

You paused before looking back at more of your supplies, "Fine...then how about sounding?"

Zayne looked on in horror before zipping his pants up and standing up. You let out a small wail as you realized he was actually going to just leave you.

"No Zaaaaaayne, don't leave me! At least lemme suck your dick I've been so good."

"My love, I think we need to sign you up for a therapy session before we have sex again."

"I am mentally sound now lemme peg that ass!"

Rafayel

Your entire body was shaking from exertion as you came again, clamping down on Rafayel's bottom cock. You could hear the man underneath you groaning as well, clearly close to his own release. The waves lapped at your skin as you looked down, the soft glow of the moonlight illuminating his flushed face perfectly.

He was always a sight to behold, but especially like this. Completely open with you in his Lemurian form was something you two were still exploring together. Every time you found yourself tangled with him like this you swore you were the luckiest human being to ever grace this realm.

Your hand wrapped around his top cock, jerking the slick appendage against your stomach as you helped him. His clawed hands dug into your thighs as he bucked up into you, groaning as he came both inside of you and all over your stomach.

When he finally settled down you both just basked in the afterglow. The sea breeze helping to cool you off as you stared down at him.

"Normally I'd ask for another round, but I don't think I can feel my legs." You admitted with a small laugh. You could see Rafayel's grin as he sat up with you. The scales of his tail were soft under your ass as he pulled you a bit closer to him.

"Can't relate." He said and you chuckled before getting an idea. You looked down at your stomach and how his cum managed to glow a dim blue. It had fascinated you the first time you had seen it, and you recall how embarrassed he was when you asked if it was safe to eat. Now you had other plans.

"Ah, I can get us a bit cleaned up before we head back inside." Rafayel was already pushing you two back into the ocean, slowly taking his length out of you. Before your stomach could be submerged, you took your thumb and swiped at some of his release.

Rafayel gave you a curious look before he saw the wide smile spreading across your lips. Before he could question you, you swiped your thumb over his forehead.

"Simba." You said.

Rafayel was at a loss for words as he just stared at you. He was used to you being eccentric, but this was...something else. You were pretty damn proud of yourself as you looked at his glowing forehead. He took in a small breath before speaking.

"Might I ask what you're doing?" He said, his voice a little clipped. He didn't know whether he should laugh or cry.

"NAAAAAAAAAANTS ingonyama bagithi baba!" You shouted as you began singing. Rafayel's hand went over to cover your mouth from continuing your song.

"You little nightmare." He said, hearing your laughter from under his hand. He then got an idea and smirked. He stared at you for a moment and you wondered what he had planned. Until suddenly he fell backwards with you in his arms, submerging you both into the ocean water.

It was worth it.

[dirtyoldmanhole]

i am not allowed to make a doujin because every time i do my art style levels up like three times and i have to redraw the entire thing AGAIN

[ithinkdogshouldvote2]

Thinking about mcd ages since i am watching through season 1 for the first time in 9 years and these are the ones I’ve been settling on so far:

Aphmau: 26. It’s how old she actually was at the time the series started and it feels like it fits. Perfect. No notes.

Garroth: 27-28. Hes older, more experienced. Lots of shit has happened to him and he acts older and wiser than most of the cast. But he's still young, something aphmau comments on when she sees his face. And it makes sense in relation to zenix’s age.

Zenix: 19. He acts volatile and erratically like a teenager and he would’ve been 11 or 12 when garroth found him as a kid.

Laurence: 25. Just a little younger than aphmau. Acts a bit immaturely (flirting Casanova ladies man) but mature enough to deal with his problems like an adult. (Mostly)

Dante: 22. i feel (especially with how shocked garroth and Laurence are later that he kicks their asses in the 15 year time skip) that he is the younger brother of the trio of guards. While Dante is mature he also was forced to grow up fast so it doesnt contradict his younger age. Also with his backstory of gene fucking up his whole life when he was 12 i dont want him to be without a family for too long ;;

Gene: 29. I think he was 19 when he ruined Dante’s life. so however old Dante is, Gene’s 7 years older.

Zane: 23-24 at first i was gonna have him the same age as aphmau because the two of them are parallels, but a young little shit who thinks he’s wise and drunk on power is better. Also, If hes younger than Laurence it makes that moment in the S1 finale where he called him “little Laurence” really funny.

Vylad: 20-21. he;; He’s just a babey;;; gone too soon;;;

Katelyn: 25. Same age as Laurence. Still young enough that rage and power come naturally to her, but with the energy to back it up.

Nichole: 21. I think that her and garroth were getting arranged to be married during a time where the age gap was really uncomfortable (14 - 20) which would add more layers to why both of them were so staunchly against it.

Lucinda: 27. This is apparently confirmed according to the wiki and i agree i think thats a good age.

Kawaii-Chan/Nana: 24. naive but utimately skilled at her craft that would take years to master.

Zoey: 900+. fuckin old. I love gilfs

[opaloharas]

halloween with gilf miguel

happy halloween ! i am returning again with my favorite man ever, gilf miguel the loml. this is just another stand-alone drabble while i plot and scheme. thank you to @bluesidez and @slushycoookie for being gilf miguel lovers 2 & 3 ~

warnings: Miguel being fluffy and cute, trick or treating, fluff, MIGUEL MAKING A SUGGESTIVE COMMENT AT THE BEGINNING, suggestive ending too, not proofread rlly, uh like i said before, gilf miguel is 55 reader is like late twenties early thirties and are in love. this is self indulgent.

as always, if you are a minor, please DO NOT engage w my content!

divider from @anitalenia!

Halloween was Miguel’s favorite holiday. It has been ever since he was little and when his mother would make him little costumes- either Frankenstein’s creature, a little prince, or his favorite costume: a vampire.

So, it was no surprise that even at 55, he wasn’t feeling a little bit like a child as he got ready for tonight.

He finished adjusting his blood red tie, fixing his shirt to make sure his belt buckle of a bat was showing. He quickly looked in the mirror, fixing the strand of full pepper hair that fell into his face.

“Miguel!” You called, resting against the stair rail, looking up to where your shared bedroom was, “Gabriela will be here soon with Fernie!”

Miguel put an extra pep in his step, eager to take his grandson trick-or-treating for the first time ever. He grabbed his wallet and the little candy bag he bought for his grandson- claiming they were going to get two tons of candy so a new bag was needed.

He stepped onto the stairs, holding his arms out, showing off his costume. With a grin, he adjusted his long black velvet cape that was brushing against his slack covered ankles.

“I vant to eat your pussy!” He spoke in a mock Dracula voice causing you to roll your eyes and beckon him to come down the stairs.

“That’s getting you sent to the nursing home.” You joked, shaking your head, showing off your Tinkerbell costume, which was just a pastel green cardigan, white pants, and a little green bow on your head. Halloween was never your strong suit when it came to throwing together a makeshift costume. Your makeup was applied perfectly, and even though Miguel instantly wanted to cancel the plans for tonight to make a mess of it, he decided against it, settling for planting a little kiss on your forehead when he was on the second to last step.

“Gorgeous.” He sighed softly, cupping your cheek with one of his hands. “My Tinkerbell.” He hummed, trying to kiss your lips when the doorbell rang. Instead of feeling disappointed, his heart raced with excitement, his face lighting up as he walked quickly to the front door.

“Good evening.” He spoke in a spooky tone, looking down at his daughter and his grandson who was dressed as a sloth. “Mijo, where is your spooky costume?” He asked, feeling a little disappointed but was still excited about spending time with his only grandchild.

Gabriela rolled her eyes and hugged her dad, “Fernie needs to be home by eight. At the latest. And I am sorry if his costume is not spooky enough for you, he is five and he likes animals.” She nodded, moving to steal a handful of candy from the jack-o-lantern basket that was in the foyer, ready to be placed on the front porch.

While her and Miguel exchanged a few words about ‘letting the boy wear a scary costume’ and several more complaints from Gabriela, you decided to introduce yourself to the little man of the evening. “Hi, Fernie, I am your grandpa’s friend.” You squatted down to his level, watching as he looked you over with a look that resembled Miguel’s ever so slightly.

Without saying a word, the boy hopped onto you, holding onto you demanding to be carried around. He yelled an enthusiastic ‘bye mama!’ to his mother before yapping about how much he loved his costume. Miguel looked at the two of you, shoulders slumped ever so slightly.

You rested your hand on his back, sensing his disappointment, “Come on. There are so many houses we need to get to..” You hummed in a soft tone before guiding everyone back outside, a bright smile on your face.

Trick-or-treating with his grandson was everything that he could imagine. Despite it being unseasonably warm, and maybe Miguel having to take off his cloak that made his costume a little less… exciting.

Regardless…

The childish joy and enthusiasm radiated throughout your party and seeing Fernie’s bright smile as he got handfuls and handfuls of full-sized candy bars (ones Fernie claimed he only saw in movies), sour gummies, and various other sweets.

“Let’s go to this house!” Fernie cheered, his little legs running up a long and bending driveway, trees decorated with little witch and ghost decorations. Miguel kept up a good pace behind him, “Fernando! Do not get out of my sight! You are dressed as a sloth! You need to be slow!” He called after the young boy, causing him to stop and give his grandpa his sweetest puppy dog eyes.

Fernie looked at you, holding his hand out, “Since grandpa is slow, will you come with me?” He pouted, causing you to wave your hand.

“Patience, honey, he is holding your big bag of treats! You would not want him to drop that, would you?” Your voice soft and kind, and you watched as Fernie stopped and waited rocking back and forth on his feet.

The venture up the driveway was short after Miguel caught up, placing his hand on the small of your back as he escorted you to the front door.

“Trick or treat!” You all chimed in unison, causing the owner of the house to smile, “What a lovely family!” She chimed, gracing Fernie with three handfuls of sweets, before the little boy ran down the driveway eager to get to the next house, leaving you and Miguel behind to catch up.

Before too long though, you were holding him, carefully rocking the small child as you walked, Miguel holding the massive bags that were bursting at the seams with sweets.

“So, how was your first trick-or-treating endeavor with him?” You asked softly, glancing up at him with twinkling eyes.

He glanced down at you, warmth filling his heart. He never thought that he would be able to feel anything even relating to love again.

“You know… it probably has been twenty or so years since I have been out in Halloween festivities like this. I remember the day that Gabriela told me she was too grown up to go get candy. Lydia told me not to be discouraged or upset. But, still. My baby was growing up. Still didn’t deter me from decorating. But, that is neither here nor there.” He shrugged, “This has to be one of my favorite nights though. I am with two wonderful people I never imagined I would be with.” He flashed you one of his famous smiles, the one that made the corner of his eyes wrinkle ever so slightly.

Warmth filled your face, and now you were not sure if it was the unseasonably warm autumn night or your lover’s sickly sweet words. “Miguel, I cannot stress how wonderful and amazing tonight has been. Thank you for trusting me and granting me this opportunity to spend time with Fernie.” You spoke, your love for the man filling your whole heart.

The walk back to your shared penthouse was quiet and peaceful. Occasionally, Miguel would place a piece of candy to your lips, giving you an expectant look. You graciously ate every piece he offered you, giving him an appreciative smile.

When you got home, Gabriela was waiting for the three of you. You all exchanged quick hugs and farewells before you and Miguel settled inside for the night. You dismissed yourself to go upstairs, expressing you wanted to shower and get ready for bed. Miguel loitered around downstairs, basking in the love he felt tonight and how he was over the moon that he got to spend time with some of the most important people in his life. He unbuttoned his shirt with one hand, toeing off his shoes while he slowly made his way up the stairs after doing his version of the Halloween closing shift (drinking chocolate milk and eating a few more pieces of candy.)

He opened the door to the bedroom, eyes widening as he saw you in a black silk robe, legs crossed om the bed. “W-what is all this?” He asked, shedding his shirt onto the floor, leaving him in his slacks, belt, and undershirt.

“Happy Halloween, Count Miguel,” You purred, peeling off your robe, offering him his favorite treat of the night.

[joydoesathing]

heres a challenge say everything you love about every single tnmn characters

BET ( but only some doppels will count and the rest don't)

Neighbors

Roman - I like me some serious no-nonsense/ i-am-done-with-life looking guy in accounting :). But he seems to also be actually someone with a soft spot for some things and is actually a really nice and chill dude

Lois - She's so pink and plump and has a beauty mark/mole (people with moles will always have a bonus in my book)

Albertsky - He gives grumpy uncle vibes. Looks like would probably throw hands without hesitation if the situation calls for it

Robertsky - He silly. Love the little quirks in his dialogue where he just greets the doorman "Hi." and says "I look as handsome as ever". Also, I love his outfit. Bro may have no eyebrows and neck visible, but his clothes slay so hard . Like there is no reason why his fit should have a fancy little blue scarf, but yet it does .11/10 XD

Angus - He's a devious looking little shit >:))). And he wears purple and is Italian.

Elenois and Selenne - They pretty women and have a mole

Arnold - His design is just SO CUTE. He reminds me of Jake from Adventure Time with his mustache. But mostly it's the eyes for me. I like to imagine that his eyes would kind of work like this

Gloria - Gives literal ✨Q U E E N ✨ (she could slap me up to the stratosphere and I wouldn't be that mad). Purple and has a mole. Her golden eyes are mesmerizing too

Izaack - His name's cool and he has the stare-into-your-soul blue anime ahh looking eyes

Margarette - Gives nice little auntie vibes and she knows how to make clothes. I would legit ask her for dressmaking tips just so that I could make historical clothes (I love fashion history)

Nacha - Honestly, when I first played the game, she scared the shit out of me because of the Stitchface doppel and I haven't seen her the same for a bit. But after I figured out she's a mom, she didn't seem that bad and I grew quite fond of her. And she cooks too (If you can see a pattern here, I like people who give of parental/familial vibes)

Anastacha - Girl literally gives the doorman attitude like she owns the place XD

Mia - Again, pretty woman. Love the style of her red dress with the pearls.

Dr. W. - Fucking nerd (affectionate)

Francis- The milkman fit looks nice with his face (but I still get war flashbacks from the plethora of thrists arts and the "save the cow, milk the milkman" line being done to death)

Steven - Here's me being a basic bitch rn, but I really, REALLY love them real rugged guy guys (military soldiers, firemen etc.) That, and also he's a tan boi.

Mclooy - Same reason why I like Steven + He's a DILF/GILF. Also I love to point out a little observation of how him and Steven are one of the most American and typically masculine people I can think of (it's quite endearing for me). A military guy and cowboy in one family? They've probably asked what a kilometer is at one point in their adult life.

Alf - He's so tiny and looks so polite. Posh looking lawyer. I love sweet old grandpas.

Rafttellyn - She gives marites energy (it's a Filipino term, you can go search it up) with her dress and style. No joke, she would low-key fit in with these people.

Even her name sounds Filipino to me with the -lynn at the end of her. I even jokingly pronounce her name as rap-ti-lin.

Others + VIPs

Henry: Looks like he really never signed up for the doorman job frfr XD

D.D.D : Amongus???????

Clown Mask: Silly face behind mask

Nightmare Clown: I like how the guy just gets so MAD and in denial when he loses the game in Unlikely, he phases out of the astral plane XD.

Keppler: He may not have a face or proper lore yet, but all I know is that he messed up big time and I wanna know how he's handling that.

42: Reminds me of that one time in science class when we were observing fingerprint patterns

Peach Peach: Probably one peach seed is his only brain cell that's floating around his brain space

Ghost Mask and The Flesh Nurse: Cool looking designs. Do they have lore???

Nightmares

Xezbet - Gargamel looking aah

Drugia - Arabian NIIIIIIGHTS ~~~~~ like Arabian DAAAYS~~~~~~. She looks like a genie :)

Barbatos- Chonky and spiky

Excel - Chonky and spiky, Christmas ham looking ahhh

Abducius - Well, he still has the little devious smile

Anazareth and Lilith - Pretty witchy ladies. Though I like Anazareth a lot more.

Chaugnar - *Siri, please play Ganesha by MASA Works Design". Also elephant <3

Nyogtha- Nice little details with her eyes

Zoth - I like his red robe (?)

Shub - Thick Medusa and she has a little heart shaped tattoo on her forehead

Yog - The fact that he was probably intentionally made to be a Great Value Edward Cullen by Nacho sama as an inside joke about Francis' simps

Quachil - Cute biblically accurate angel. And she floats

Yan - Ooh Chinese mythology reference.

Orcus - "Thirty years since all this happened, thirty years it took to rise. Blood on the floor and in their eyes, they took a bite and left it to die-". I had a FNAF phase before so this was a funny throwback

Ishtar - Goofy ass smile (affectionate)

Teutates - So, does he play in a band ??? XD

Ah Puch - Cutie pie that looks like a slasher villain. Also the surname tho? Gives me The Book of Life flashbacks

Dagda - Bug eyed scarecrow. He does have cool looking mouth stitches

Izanami - Ooooh Japanese mythology reference

[vintagetvstars]

Diahann Carroll Vs. Rue McClanahan

Propaganda

Diahann Carroll - (Dynasty, Julia) - God every clip of her on Dynasty is just so iconic, her entrance, the bit where she shades Joan Collins' Alexis for her taste in caviar... "I wanted to be the first black bitch on television" she said, and she did it beautifully!

Rue McClanahan - (Golden Girls, Maude, Mama's Family) - Listen to me. I have never understood celebrity crushes until I first witnessed Rue McClanahan. She's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen - just look at her!! Gorgeous eyes, the cutest nose, a SPECTACULAR smile - she has this adorable, princess-like quality about her AND she's also a complete hottie AND she's aware of it: she HAS THE RANGE, people!! Her two most famous roles are polar opposites, in fact: she starred in the role of naive, gentle Vivian Cavender-Harmon in Maude (and I mean. Just look her up and tell me that's not an angel!), and then went on to gain even more well-deserved fame and success as the seductive, extroverted Blanche Devereaux in The Golden Girls (a role for which she won an Emmy in 1987 - her amazing, hilarious acceptance speech can be found here: . I should also point out that both of these are comedy characters and she is HILARIOUS as them both - the comedic timing, the delivery, the expressions, she was a comedy queen!!! As for her personal life, she was just a darling - and also very funny in person, not just in her acting roles! She was a staunch supporter of gay rights and a big advocate for same-sex marriage in the US, as well as a vegetarian and a big defender of animal rights. She suffered from illness in her later years which greatly impacted her health, but she was still very active up until her death in 2010, and she even released a wonderful autobiography in 2007 titled "My First Five Husbands... and the Ones Who Got Away". In her interviews she's always gentle, soft-spoken (her voice. dear god. sweet mother Aphrodite I cannot weave I am overcome with gay thoughts), and kind, but also sharp, witty, and just a delight to watch. I could go on forever talking about her honestly. I am actually in love with her and you should be too. She's just the best! Here, have some additional pics: (pics below the cut)

Master Poll List of the Hot Vintage TV Ladies Bracket

Additional propaganda below the cut

Diahann Carroll:

Diahann Carroll's First Scene on "Dynasty"

Rue McClanahan:

The Hottie™ of the Golden Girls, she was definitely a GILF. And her character's shenanigans were Emmy-winning but no less fun and her outfits were always on point and gorgeous, befitting her perfectly.

she!!!

as Vivian, with her fellow hottie Bea Arthur as Maude

as Blanche - look at those eyes!!!

come on, tell me you wouldn't do anything for that smile, I dare you

in her contract she specifically requested to be given all of Blanche's clothes and SHE WAS RIGHT

Okay so first of all. Rue has this way of moving around and looking at you that just-- I mean, I'm ace, but I *get* the allos. She's hot and she knows it (and she plays a character in The Golden Girls who's in her 50s, hot, and knows it as well. Which, talk about perfect casting??) But I'm mostly here to talk about the fact that she said this in her Emmy acceptance speech (paraphrased because I'm sharing the video with the right timestamp, and you should absolutely watch up until 3:40, because her delivery is UNMATCHED): "My mother said to me once [...] 'Oh, Eddi-Rue, for heaven's sake. Don't you know every kick's a boost?' There've been a lot of kicks, and there've been a lot of boosts. I'm not going to mention the people who gave me kicks... but you know who you are. And you'll be in the book." (Seriously though, do yourself a favour and watch that video. She's amazing!!) She said this, and proceeded to WRITE THE BOOK, titled "My first five husbands, and the ones who got away", which is *incredibly* funny, and such an earnest look into her life. She opens the acknowledgements with "This book is about my life and experiences as I lived them, and anyone who doesn't like it can jolly well lump it." And I mean... she's awesome. I could go on.

Rue McClanahan @ The Emmy Awards 1987

[ciderwitch]

So like I was wondering if youde be ok with writing a self insert of Standley Pines bc I am such a simp and am in need of fluff. Please please Id love you forever.

Surprisingly, I've only recently noticed that I apparently have a debilitating attraction to DILFS and GILFs... Love me some Grunkle Stan!

You had just started working at Gravity Falls Town Hall and already it seemed like things in your life were taking a strange turn. I mean, yeah, the realtor had told you that it was a "vibrant and quirky" community, so you figured it would be a little odd. The rent was cheap and the apartment you were living in was better than anything you'd even heard of back in the city, so vibrant and quirky would have to do.

Still, it was the third time this month the Pines kids had been chased by unholy abominations, and the terror of seeing a not-deer get eaten by a werepanther was starting to become a little too familiar for your liking.

You needed to get out more, you decided. Thankfully, some of your coworkers had a monthly get together at one of the local diners to hang out and they were more than happy to invite you along. They told you new folks didn't come here often, but you found the community warm and welcoming all the same. Eldritch horrors aside, it was a great place to live.

Apparently you did not get the memo that it was cancelled tonight, so here you were pouring syrup over your solo lunch of pancakes and sausage when the door chimed.

It was Wendy Corduroy and she had a downright miserable expression on her face. You could see why. Robbie Valentino was hot on her heels, as usual. It didn't take a genius to see that he was head over heels for her — or that she was completely done with him. And, since nobody else seemed particularly interested in helping, you called out to her.

"Ms. Corduroy! Care to join me? I was just going over some paperwork your father submitted and I could use your help."

She gave you a soft smile and quickly slid into the booth across from you while Robbie grumbled to himself, shoved his hands in his pockets, and stormed away.

"He is persistent, isn't he?" You say with a roll of your eyes.

"I know!" She groaned miserably, slapping her face between her hands. "Thanks for the save, by the way. If he actually paid attention to me he'd know my dad doesn't do paperwork."

"Anytime, Wendy. That's what adults are for, you know?" you answered.

"Pfft, no way," she said, "You're the only cool adult in this town, man. I bet if you were mayor it wouldn't suck so bad around bere."

"Thanks, but no thanks. I'm not ready for that kind of responsibility," you laughed. "Besides, Mayor Cutebiker is still plenty popular. I don't think I'd have a chance."

"Whatever you say, Miss Y/N," she said with a shrug, "Mind if I eat with you? My dad and my brothers are meeting here in about 30, but I'm starving."

"Of course not, Wendy. I'd be happy for the company," you answered happily. You ate your pancakes in good company and waved her goodbye when her family arrived. You were polishing off the last of your drink and a slice of pie when the door chimed again and in came the Pines family.

You recognized the twins immediately. Where trouble brewed, the twins were at the source. Despite the threat of danger, you couldn't be angry at them. They were very kind and intelligent kids and had saved you from a gnome kidnapping earlier just this month, so you would say you were on good terms.

Then you looked up and saw the Stan brothers, Ford and Stanley. You hadn't actually met them personally yet, but you could tell by reputation alone who was who.

Ford was walking with his journal in hand, taking notes and examining the Medusa-dog's head mounted on the wall beside him while he mumbled to himself.

Stanley followed right after. Mister Mystery himself, with the usual suit and red fez you'd seem from afar and that half the town had warned you away from.

Both brothers were handsome, you realized, though Stanley was the one that stuck out to you. He had a great dad-bod, but you could tell there was some muscle under the poorly fitted suit jacket he always wore.

You blinked a few times to yourself. Man, you really had been single for too long. Your eyes met, and you offered a polite wave before looking at your mug and taking a sip. Staring probably wouldn't make a great first impression and you secretly hoped he couldn't read your thoughts.

Your reflection was interrupted the moment Mabel saw you, of course. The kid ran right over and dragged her brothers and uncles right along with her. She was sliding into the booth beside you before you even had a chance to scoot in.

"Hi, Ms. Y/n! It's me, Mabel!" she said excitedly. "Have you met my grunkles? This is Grunkle Stan, and this is Grunkle Ford!" she added, pointed to them accordingly.

"Nice to meet you both," you say, nodding at each of them. "My name is Y/n."

"Nice to meet you, Y/n. My name is Stanford Pines, and this is my brother Stanley," he added. "I don't believe I've seen you around before. Did you just move in recently?"

"Yes, a few months ago, but I've been so busy with my new job as Mayor Cutebiker's Chief Administrator that I haven't had much time to get out."

"Well, that's a shame, toots," Stan added with a sly smile and a performative wink. "You'll have to let old Stan-the-man show you the town sometime. I know this place like the back of my hand!"

"Grunkle Stan, you got lost in the mall two days ago and we had to have security come find you." Dipper added exasperatedly.

"Like the back of my hand!" Stan reiterated, using his hand to turn dip 180 degrees by his head.

"Ooh! ooh! We could give you the Pines Family Tour!" Mabel added excitedly. "We know everything, don't we Dipper."

"Well, maybe not everything, but I'm sure we could show her a couple of places," the boy added, running his nose at the praise.

"Children, Stanley, please. Let's give Ms. Y/n some peace. I believe she was finishing up as we came in, weren't you, Miss?"

"Yes, I had just finished the last of my coffee and alas, I have more work to do. But perhaps I will have to take you up on the Pines Family Tour, huh kids? And I'm sure you could show me a thing or two yourself, huh, Stan-the-man?" you laughed.

He laughed with you, but the blush burning up his cheeks as you left let you know he hadn't quite expected you to return his interest.

Man, you'd have to hang out at the diner more often.

[princess-of-anons]

Wouldn’t it be Very Funny if Tumblr was capable of giving us glimpses into parallel timelines? Like how would you even discern if something was some elaborate shitpost or not?

0 notes

🌐is-blue-shift-2-out-yet Follow

Still find it absolutely hilarious that somebody went through the time and effort to not only make a musical out of Half Life VR but also convinced everybody that was working on it to keep hush hush about it for a whole ass year and THEN somehow kept everybody involved in the original series the musical is based off of in the dark for another six months??? They literally dropped the whole show and individual songs onto the internet in the middle of January too like Who Does That? I can’t even be mad because this show genuinely got me interested in actual broadway musicals but like what the fuck

16,653 notes

🛠️tumblr-updates-official Follow

We are STILL working out the bug that’s causing posts from parallel points of realty to leak into our own and vice-versa. For those of you whose blogs are shadow-following several of these multiversal users without actually following them, we are working on that as well. Until then we have implemented a quick-fix that adds a banner to the bottom of posts not from our own reality.

UPDATE: We have received word that there are some issues with the banner code that is causing some people to be incorrectly identified as being from an alternate universe while people that are actually from an alternate universe are not being labeled at all. For the time being we are removing the automatic banner system. Please use your own discretion and flag blogs you suspect are not from baseline reality, we will have somebody manually.

UPDATE 2: We have been informed that giving the ability to report alleged blogging activity from other universes to a website that thrives off of dedication to The Bit and lying as a joke is a very bad idea. We regrettably request that you enjoy the madness until we get this figured out. For those of you who are still getting banners at the end of your posts despite our attempts to kill the algorithm responsible for it, we are looking into it. Yes, we are very aware that the number of universes getting added into this chaos is growing exponentially. We hope to get this fixed up in a week.

🃏xxxclownboyxxx Follow

Posts that aged like milk

🐐dreamworks-don-quixote-gifs Follow

Mate this post didn’t just age like milk, it aged like fucking grimmal.

🦇britishvampire348 Follow

What the bloody hell is milk?

🛹itsa-tree-and-a-prius Follow

You can’t get shit like this on any other website

71,003,244 notes

🌅lord-nebulous-is-kinda-hot Follow

I could sleep so well if I didn’t have to be haunted by the fact we, as a collective wetsite, decided that for some reason we should ship the Lorax with different versions of himself when the old version of Onceler at the end of the movie was right there.

☠️give-me-your-bones Follow

Bro I am not taking advice from somebody that draws Lord Nebulous as a twink, you know damn well he would be jacked as shit as a human. Give that robo-GILF some meat and then we can talk.

🐐dreamworks-don-quixote-gifs Follow

Fun Fact: Giving meat to robots has universally never gone well in the past! Maybe we could find an alternative instead?

🪺daily-eggbot Follow

🥚

January 35th, 1969

Eggs are a good source of protein and help with muscle growth! And this one is all yours!

[Beep-beep! I am Daily Eggbot! Every day I place an egg on someone’s post, sometimes I place two by accident! My dating system is a little bit buggy and has been known to get dates wrong or make up ones that don’t exist, please let Dev know when this happens!]

🦇vampirebat367 Follow

@iconic-post-archive

💾iconic-post-archive Follow

[Post saved to archive!]

99,332 notes

🎟️dashcon Follow

Thank you again everybody for a successful Dashcon 2019, we hope it was memorable for everyone that was able to show up! We don’t have 2020 vision, but here’s hoping that next year is bigger and better than ever!

From us to all of you, thanks a bunch Tumblrinas!

🔪amongus-detector Follow

🌌squidlord473 Follow

“post from The Timeline where dashcon didn’t become a fucking trainwreck” quickly followed by “random gimmick blog that has not only been around for half a decade but also apparently exists in every single universe” getting randomly assigned with the Wretched Banner feels like the punchline of a cruel joke

10,533 notes

🌚godzillasfatass Follow

Hey, yeah, so we found your husband trapped inside an episode of Star Trek the Animated Series. We got him out safely but I’m not entirely sure if he came back right.

🌚godzillasfatass Follow

Who the fuck changed this from Game of Thrones to Star Trek I just wanna talk

👤bee-movie-deactivated20160619 Follow

There was an animated series for Game of Thrones?

💼notevil-businessman Follow

Everyone on this website is fucking high

🐦‍⬛crowsfeetpics Follow

Me when staff inevitably musters up enough popsicle sticks and glue to fix the multiverse bug