#I thought it was adorable how drunk nagi kept inching closer to shunin during his spiel

[shunin-gumis]

Designs of Happiness - Track A24

L4mps Main Story Translation

Title: The Angel’s Identity

Characters: Toi, Netaro, Nagi, Daniel, Yodaka

Summary: The protagonist is surrounded by the Night Team members, who are completely drunk. Meanwhile,Toi shows off his surprising drinking skills and entertaining the customers around him.

Thank you aca @/463ce6, myun @/myuntachis Niri @/Niri_riri and jes @/arcanecrayonn for helping me with proofing!

Netaro: I ammm learning SHO much about the human race… 

Location: Hakodate Daimon Yokocho Izakaya

Netaro: Like this famoush fellow, Skurin Dadastar discovered a SNAIL on the back of a human cranium— 

Momiji: Okay, that’s kinda gross, so let’s stop right there…

Momiji: Mama, could I get— Wait, you can choose between raw or fried scallops!?

Momiji: Ohh, how do I pick… They both look so delicious…!

Ryui: (Are they for fucking real– They’ve been stuffing themselves for three whole hours! When are they gonna fuck off already…!)

Netaro: Listen to meeeeee~~~!

Momiji: I’ll listen! But nothing that makes me want to puke, okay? 

Yodaka: Why would you stop him? I find his topics to be very intriguing, I would love nothing more than to hear the continuation, indeed. 

Momiji: …So you’re drunk too, Yodaka-san. There’s something just a little off about your speech… 

Yodaka: Do you think so? If one does not understand themselves, they night… oh?

Netaro: Ahaha! So Youda can also get a little kooky! I think my head is light and spinny… *drool* 

Yodaka: Youda… When it comes to making nicknames, you’re the champion. 

Nagi: By the way, Chief, are you listening to my story? 

Momiji: Oh, yes… 

Momiji: Something about how you keep finding one sock of a pair at the laundromat? 

Nagi: Yeah. So, normally people tie a pair of socks together and put them away, but that’s usually when you’re arranging your clothes in the closet. So I guess it makes sense for the pair to be separated when you put them in the wash. 

Nagi: But there’s no way you can survive with only one pair of socks, so I’ll tell you this story - Once upon a time there was a woman who owned a pair of woolen socks, and a pair of lace socks. One cold winter evening, she decided to visit the laundromat and— 

Momiji: (Ah… Nagi-kun’s monologue is making me feel even more tipsy…)

Daniel: The gang’s turned into quite the sight to see. 

Daniel: I’ll just take my time and sip on mine… Mama, a refill please.

Toi: …Phew.

Drunkard A: You’ve been downing those drinks like water there, angel boy! Woulda never guessed that cute face of yours belonged to a heavy drinker!

Drunkard B: How many’s it been now? I think he’s finished off one-shō bottle!

Toi: Hah, as if I could be satisfied by a mere bottle of liqueur. 

Ryui: (That fucking bastard…)

Ryui: (Never gives a shit about Toi’s body, drinkin’ so fuckin’ much!)

Proprietress: It’s always been the case that the ones with the cute looks can hold their drinks… oh?

Proprietress: Where did the muddler that I was using go off to?

Toi: Look beside the basin. 

Proprietress: Huh? …Oh! It really is here.

Proprietress: Thank you for helping me. Oh dear, don’t tell me you were watching the whole time? 

Toi: Kuku… I need not bother with such trifles. Here is some proof: The phone will ring soon. 

*phone rings*

Proprietress: Oh! I-It really rang… 

Drunkard A: Ooh, that’s some interesting trick there angel boy!

Drunkard C: Precognition? Now that’d come in handy at parties! 

Toi: How bold of you to treat me as some jester at a banquet. You dare to consider my power as mere child’s play? 

Toi: Truly, so foolish that I cannot help but adore it.

Drunkard B: Huh~ Been meanin’ to ask, what’s up with the way you talk? It’s kinda impressive. Is that how all you folks from the mainland speak?

Toi: How about I use you for my next act? I will show you what it means when a human has their soul ripped from their bodies.

Drunkard C: Soul? Now you’re talking like some kinda devil! 

Daniel: Ah… Sorry about him. Please just smile and nod to whatever he says. 

Daniel: He’s at that age you see… 

Drunkard: Ohh I get it. ‘Tis the season to walk silently and all that… 

Drunkard B: Ain’t that nostalgic~ I’ve got my dark history all recorded in some diaries back at home too.

Toi: You, the big oaf. What do you mean by “at that age?”

Daniel: Well, ya see… What I mean is… 

Daniel: Oi, is it okay for me to tell it straight to his face? What if he cries on me? 

Yodaka: In that case, I’ll take responsibility and marry you for life… or treat you to a bottle?

Netaro: Toiiii~ No, ‘nother Toi! It’s been a while since I last saw you!

Netaro: I am very much interested in you! Let’s be fwendsss~

Toi: I refuse. I am only fond of humans. 

Nagi: !

Netaro: Bwahaha! Shoooo interesting~!

Drunkard A: No helpin’ it, this old man will bite the bullet. Ye see kid, you’ve got a disease. It’s called 8th grade syndrome. 

Drunkard B: Yeah, it’s like a cold you catch while going through puberty.

Elderly Lady: Everyone has a dark history like that, young boy. That’s how you grow up.

Toi: Hah! So now it’s a disease?

Toi: To see you scramble so as to make sense of what you can’t understand is so pitiful that it brings a tear to my eye. Truly, such a frivolous thought process can only be accomplished by you humans. 

Daniel: Toi’s really doubling down on that stuff, huh.

Toi: I shall explain in a way even you fools should be able to comprehend.

Toi: I am the angel that will bring salvation to you humans. You may call me “Oshisha-sama.”

Netaro: …An angel? 

Momiji: Oshisha-sama? 

Toi: Well, I have been called by another name as well.

Toi: Such as “Astaroth.”

*Everyone pauses*

Nagi: …Got it. So that’s what he’s going with. 

Momiji: It’s very impressively detailed. Your second name is really cool!

Netaro: Angel… Along with “lonely,” this ish yet another concept that I fail to comprehend. Amaaaazing! Earth is so fascinating~ And EXCITING! 

Yodaka: Angel… Hope… Salvation… Hydrogen… Salt… Spring rolls… Shark fin… Wok… 

Daniel: Aight, I think you oughta pipe down, yer just makin’ this more confusing. 

Yodaka: Spatula… 

Momiji: Hahaha! 

Netaro: Toi, ToiToi. From the moment I met youuu, I could sense you were a supernatural being that has power faaaar beyond that of a human! 

Netaro: Aaaand THAT’S why I’m soooo interested in you! Everything in this universe, aaaall of creation, must be explainable by science or logic. Otherwise, it is NOTHING! 

Netaro: Such is the way of my planet, and SO! You, an aaaangel, must be taken apart piece by piece and factorized so that I may verify your existence! 

Toi: …… 

Nagi: Ah, that’s just his setting, yeah… 

Momiji: Huh, so Netaro-kun’s setting is that he’s come from space? 

Netaro: Yup! 

Momiji: Then maybe I’ll go with being an underground dweller! If possible, I’d like to be a God of Travel or something… 

Yodaka: Then… I shall be a police officer conducting an undercover investigation. 

Yodaka: Or perhaps a spy who is after state secrets might be fun too.

Nagi: I’ll, uh, go for something safe, like a flower fairy.

Yodaka: Hm, but perhaps you should try picking something a little more absurd. Maybe then you could relate to being at “that age” too… 

Nagi: Oh, you’ve got a point… Hm… 

Daniel: C’mon, why’re you bustin’ yer balls over this crap? Just come up with somethin’ on the fly.

Daniel: Like, you survived a nuclear fusion, or you woke up from a cold sleep, or that you have a zipper on your back, or some bull like that. 

Netaro: Have aaaany of you tried dancing on top of space debris? You can’t help but get addicted once you try it oooout! 

Daniel: Yeah, exactly. Just keep it light like that debris or whatever stuff he was goin’ on about.

Nagi: …I gotta go to the bathroom. 

Momiji: Ok, be safe outside! 

Yodaka: I’m actually an office lady who used to get a measly salary but was reincarnated into another world, and due to circumstances beyond my control I’ve become a serial killer after being hit over the head with a spatula one night— 

Daniel: Hahaha! Damn, you’re getting good at this! 

Netaro: What surprised me moooost was the concept of male and female on this planet… 

Momiji: Hmm, for underground dwellers, it’d be the sun, right? I bet they’d cry after seeing the sun for the first time! 

Daniel: I’d go with medical development.

Netaro: Hey hey, tell me, do angels have the concept of male and female too? 

Toi: …… 

Netaro: Tell meeee, what’s the definition of an angel? 

Toi: …… 

Netaro: Tell me tell me tell ME! Can angels die? 

Toi: …… 

Momiji: Netaro, maybe he hasn’t developed his setting that far yet, so try to dial back the questions… 

Netaro: Are you really an angel? 

Toi: ……Kukuku.

Toi: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Netaro: Woahhh.

Momiji: T-Toi-kun? 

Daniel: Dumbass, bein’ so loud will bother the others! 

Toi: …I was entertained for a fleeting moment, but now I tire of your rubbish. 

Toi: Rejoice. I shall show you the real thing. 

Location: Hakodate - Daimon Yokocho

Nagi: …… 

Nagi: (The moon sure is beautiful.)

Nagi: (...Has there ever been a night like this before, where I didn’t feel lonely?)

Nagi: (I have friends who’ll keep me company through the night now, along with good food and alcohol. I feel happy.)

Nagi: (So, this is what you call a trip… It’s amazing. I want to stay in this moment for as long as I can.) 

Nagi: (I should probably give the Chief some flowers while I have the chance. It’s a good thing I packed some in my bag, then—)

*rumbling*

Nagi: Huh…?

Nagi: (What’s this sound? It started so suddenly… Like it’s coming from the very depths of the earth…)

*ground shakes*

Nagi: W-Wha… Is this an earthquake?

Notes:

shō is a traditional unit of volume, approx. 1.8 litres

Yodaka makes a pun saying he'd take responsibilty and marry Daniel for life 一緒 (issho) or for a bottle 一升 (issho)

Astaroth, in demonology, is known to be the Great Duke of Hell.

<- Previous | Next ->

Masterlist