#I think I unfollowed every fandom blog save for two? three? so I could be alone instead of lonely
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Spn blogs in my recs and they WILL NOT LEAVE.
#they’re even on my main blog now#at least for me#and like yeah I get it blood and rot and family and whatever#I think I’m getting my period soon because it usually doesn’t annoy me like this but GOD#I don’t WANT these here.#but tbh I just don’t like the fandom. it’s all very clique-y and I am so so lonely#like genuinely I haven’t felt good about a single thing I posted for that in way too long#I like WRITING but posting?? in that fandom? it’s terrible. I hate it#& I’ve taken to writing out all my frustration and anger and grief in a separate doc to be deleted before posting the main work#which is fucking. just. it’s bad. I’ve never had to do that for ANY fandom I wrote for.#and I geeeeeet that it’s because it’s such a big fandom so people know each other and it’s not like my small communities where you#parallel play in peace. but I don’t like it. it’s deeply uncomfortable and isolating and I’m so sick of it#but I also like the writing I do so I try to just stay in my niche and not look at anyone else#I think I unfollowed every fandom blog save for two? three? so I could be alone instead of lonely#but it still washes over me whenever I post something.#oh an! sometimes I’m tempted to just do something super mass appealing so they’ll like me but that just makes me feel worse#I’ve been tempted to delete my blog so many times because I lost my friends from the old fandoms and this one is the poorest substitute#but I also feel like that won’t make me happier either. I wish I’d just never started engaging w that show tbh#okay done. just. I’m going through it
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30 Days of Autism Acceptance: Days 17-26
This is a list of questions by @autie-jake (full list here), where you’re supposed to answer one per day for every day of April. I keep forgetting to do these daily, so here’s all the days since my last post. My last post is here.
April 17: Have you experienced ableism before? If so, how did it feel and how did you handle it?
Yes! Actually, it made my childhood so bad that my brain decided to forget it. So, clearly nothing to write about here.
April 18: Discuss how you felt when you felt when you first learnt you were autistic vs how you feel now.
I’m not good at the whole “remembering how I feel” thing. My memories of my feelings are all semantic memory. I know as a 6th grader I thought autism was super cool and I read a whole autobiography of an autistic savant because I wanted to find out more about it (Born on a Blue Day by Daniel Tammett). After a lot of intense research, I decided that I couldn’t conclusively self-diagnose, and regretfully slinked away back into not understanding or advocating for my needs. Sometime later, an actually autistic coworker of mine looked at me for like five (5) minutes, and was like, “Hey, have you been diagnosed with autism yet?” I’ve since adopted her as my second mom, for that and other reasons. I’ve had very few moments in my life when I was sad to have an autistic trait, and I got over it fairly quickly.
April 19: Talk about scripting. Is scripting something that you normally do? What kind of situations do you have a script for? Does it help you?
People don’t like my apologies, so I have a couple apology scripts saved. Otherwise I tend to just wing it and fail spectacularly. The apology scripts tend to sound… scripted, but they’re better than just doing it myself, I think.
April 20: Discuss stimming. In what ways do you stim? What does stimming mean to you? What do individual stims that you do mean? Do you have any stim toys? What would you like people to know about stimming?
Pressure stims are the most important stims for me. I’m more likely to be squeezing a part of my body than not. If nothing else, I can cross my legs tight and squeeze them together. This doesn’t have any specific function; it’s just something I do that makes me feel better. When I’m stressed, I do it more.
I also do motion stims. Often my way of locomotion is more like dancing. This is a little strange, because I don’t otherwise dance. I always feel happy, relaxed, and in control when I do that. When I’m sad or tired, my feet are too heavy for it. I am also very animate with my hands when I talk. When I taught English in Hungary for the first time, the first question I was asked whether all Americans talk with their hands as much as I do. (I don’t think they do. I have it on good authority from at least one American I trust utterly that the way I use my hands is rather unique.)
I have two improvised stim toys for pressure stimming (a scarf for wrapping very tight around limbs, and a butterknife for applying waves of uniform pressure). I also recently found one of those head scratchy thingies, and now I use it every five minutes or so. It’s a little inconvenient with headphones on, but I’m rather creative with it, anyway. I don’t actually like light touch or tickles, but generally the head scratchy thingy can be given enough pressure to provide a substantial stimulus.
April 21: Give a shoutout to some of your favorite autism blogs/autistic bloggers
UM. HMM. Like 10-50% of the people I follow are autistic, but hell if I can remember any of their handles.
I reblog from @nonbinary-hawke and their native issues-related sideblog @finding-my-culture like multiple times a day but I’m pretty sure they kinda just tolerate me? I’m mostly cut off from the actual native community I’m supposed to be part of (the Siberian one), so I try to follow American native issues with kind of a “not my lane but I’m still sympathetic” vibe, and their blogs are most of my way of keeping in touch. But we have a lot of other random things in common too; similar age, similar neurotype, similar fandoms, etc. So I’m pretty much always gonna have a platonic tumblr crush on them, given that and how much I respect their principles.
@autisticadvocacy is ASAN’s official blog, I think, and it’s always posting useful and relevant articles.
@autisticjoy and @autismisaokay are two blogs I’ve followed for most of my time on tumblr. I get the majority of my autism-related content from them.
@autistic-noodle is the first autism-related blog I ever followed! I highly recommend her; if I haven’t unfollowed her after all this time, then that means that they’ve never reblogged anything that’s triggered me, which is pretty darn impressive.
@bogleech is my favorite webcomic artist, which is a vaunted honor coming from someone with ¾ of a special interest in webcomics. I’m not actually sure if he’s autistic, but he posts enough autism-related content to justify being on this list one way or another.
I’ve definitely learned at least one useful thing from @autisticlifehack. What was it? Who knows?
@autistic-flirting is very cute, if not very active.
Shout out to @tikibats and @dreamfriend, who I actually know IRL.
April 22: What are some social rules that do not make sense to you/that you don't understand?
I’m, uh. Actually not sure? I can usually explain stuff if I think hard enough. There’s some stuff I’ve never bothered to figure out, but none of it’s so pressing that I can actually remember it.
Oh! Actually! One night during freshman year of college, I went to the computer lab to do my homework in a not-at-all-revealing bathrobe. I’ve received several explanations on why this was wrong, but I don’t remember any of them.
April 23: Do you have any internal rules? What are they?
LOTS, wow. If I didn’t have them, I wouldn’t have any shred of consistency whatsoever. I am nothing but these rules. Some of them feel more like strong opinions that can be taken or left, like the ones pertaining to writing style, but even those I follow 99% of the time. They range from really foundational moral ones like, “Everything with a mind intrinsically deserves your friendship and understanding,” and, “Every neurotype deserves to exist,” to, “Always wrap code to 80 columns (unless it’s highly nested like Lisp, in which case consider 100 columns),” and, “When mixing fruit flavor tea, always pour the syrup before the tea.” It’s quite the hodgepodge.
April 24: Talk about community. What does the autistic community mean to you? Is it important? How does it feel?
I haven’t had much of a chance to actually participate in any autistic community yet. I don’t even really participate in the tumblr autistic community. It’s just sorta me, my second mom, and a couple random people I get to see occasionally. (Also, my dad, but we don’t talk about my dad.) Most of my friends are neurodivergent in some way, though, so I’m happy with the people I have. (Not that I don’t enjoy hanging around neurotypical people, too. But it feels good to not have to work to make yourself be understood.)
April 25: Do you know any other autistic people off the internet? Is anyone else in your family autistic or are you the only one? Do you wish you knew more?
See yesterday’s answer! I wouldn’t do this if I were doing these day by day, but I’m totally justified here, because it’s literally the previous paragraph.
April 26: In what ways can allistic people better accommodate you and other autistic people? What would you consider helpful?
It’s a broad question. My mom has been getting better at not punishing me for my autistic traits, but the other day she still antagonized me for stimming at the dinner table. (I’m 22. Nearly 23.) So it’d be great if she didn’t do things like that. Not even gonna talk about what my dad could do better. (The ways he does accomodate me seem unintentional.)
Outside of that, I appreciate it when people give me very clearly-worded instructions, broken down into small steps, with every possible detail specified. I appreciate it even more when those instructions are in written form, because I can only remember two or three of those when they’re spoken aloud.
I appreciate it when food places with complex menus have the option to just sit down with the menu, without a time limit, and make up your order. Sandwich and wrap places, like Subway, make me very uncomfortable for reason; Subway has an extremely combinatorically complex menu, and you’re expected to make up your order while they’re making the sandwich. I’d like to spend some time staring at a sheet with each sandwich ingredient listed and explained, and the ways they can be combined, first.
The current switch to online classes has been great for my ability to understand lectures, and terrible for my ability to do classwork and homework. Hearing the lecture through headphones circumvents most of my auditory processing issues, and seeing the lecture slides clearly circumvents most of my attention issues. But when it comes to doing classwork and homework, executive dysfunction rules me. I do wish my executive dysfunction were better accomodated for even in the case of normal classes (and probably careers), but it’s hard to guess what form that would take. I’ve run out of brainpower for good ideas.
For the rest of the month I will do these questions daily, one at a time. Hopefully.
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I'm feeling really frustrated with the fandom these days. The final season of the show, which I loathe with the ferocity of a thousand suns, is coming and is everywhere and is going to reveal the ending of the books, which frustrates me. There are shipping wars, which I loathe. The theories have dried up. People seem to be extra entitled about TWOW than usual and the people who make fun of it in a good natured are also frustrating me. I just feel disenchanted. What do I do?
I can only tell you what works for me. Idk if my methods would work for anybody else, and just to clarify, this is not me dictating what anyone else should do, this is just what I do.
1) Block early and block often. I used to just mute people but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ As they say in ADWD, winter’s here babe and not all of us are makin’ it to spring.
2) Blacklist like it’s 1947. I have three blacklists running simultaneously. Tumblr’s blacklist as a first line of defense, xKit’s blacklist for a “soft” hide because I also have xkit’s whitelist running, and Tumblr Savior for a hardcore blacklist without a whitelist. Blacklist everything. Politely (politely!!) ask people to tag a Thing for blacklisting if necessary. If that does not work, unfollow. Mute and/or block if necessary. I do not recommend using mobile.
3) Focus on what you love. I’m here to enjoy ASOIAF content. I don’t talk about the characters I don’t like. I don’t hate-read. I don’t write hate meta. Some people define “fandom” as “hating things” and I avoid those people. The people who predominantly hate on things are currently drowning out the people who just want to enjoy things and we gotta turn the tide, we gotta be the change we want to see in the world. (By ASOIAF content, I mean Lannisters.)
So ask yourself what you love about the books. What parts do you love? What’s your favorite passage? Favorite line? Go reread it. Go blog about it. Do it now, as if this were one of those writer memes. Talk about it or just quote it, but you need a reminder of what you love. Go. I’ll wait. We have time.
4) Pace yourself. As you well know, this is a marathon, not a sprint. You gotta take breaks, or you’ll burn yourself out. Read other books and watch other tv shows. (I have recs if you need them!) And for the love of r’hllor, make sure you pick up a tactile hobby that doesn’t involve a screen. When I do other things and I enjoy other media, I come back to ASOIAF refreshed. I have new ideas. I look at certain passages with new eyes. So pace yourself.
5) Brace yourself. This toxic storm is going to get worse before it gets better. I don’t just mean the trashfire that’s coming down the pipe over the next two months. I mean the years between TWOW and ADOS. TWOW is going to be a very dark book, where the Heroes make a lot of morally grey choices and do some terrible things that @ntis will hold up and scream, “see, they were the villain all along!!1!” Expect this with every pov character; batten down the hatches now (see #1 and #2).
6) Sow the seeds of kindness. I cannot change how toxic this fandom has become, but I can tend my small corner of it. I try to say at least one nice thing to someone every time I log on. Send a nice ask, comment on someone’s post, let people know how much you appreciate their hard work. Maybe if enough people did this, everyone together could turn the fandom tide. (Probably unlikely, but it never hurts to hope, or to dream.)
7) Know your exits. Define precisely what will make you hit the eject button. This can be something(s) the fandom does, something GRRM does, something the show does, whatever, but I have my lines drawn in the sand and I know what will make me say, “I’m done.” I have my exit strategy planned, if necessary.
8) Find a long term ASOIAF project. Write that looong fanfiction, draw that complicated thing, do that big analysis, whatever. I have more long term ASOIAF projects than I know what to do with, R’hllor help me, I need help with them.
9) Be steadfast. Listen to me: the books are going to end with the Others defeated. No, I have not read ADOS, but I know this in my heart to be true. GRRM is a dreamer, not a nihilist.
The show is also going to end with the Others defeated. (Permanently? I don’t know. But defeated? Yes.) The Others defeated - that is what I believe the “same ending” means in the books and the show.
Everything else is up for grabs. I have sat in an auditorium with GRRM in 2018 and listened to him say – very forcefully – that characters who die on the show will live in the books, and vice versa.
So when you say, the show “is going to reveal the ending of the books,” I have to disagree with you. I do not think that the endings are going to be entirely the same, aside from the fact that the Others are going to be defeated. I think the showrunners who tout the “same ending” are speaking very broadly, and they don’t care about anything except cool visuals and cold hard cash.
That show could end with Jon and Dany sharing the Iron Throne with their ten children, and until GRRM says otherwise, I will maintain that the Iron Throne is gonna get melted, and that Jon and Dany will die in the books while saving the world.
None of my ASOIAF predictions are changing until I have the books in my hands, or GRRM says something that disproves my theories.
So my advice to you is: Be steadfast. The show is not the books.
The books are an emotional journey. It’s the journey that matters – it’s the range of emotions those words on every page inspire in you – it’s the journey, not the destination.
I don’t know about you, but that tv show inspires no emotion in me. The books, on the other hand, inspire some of my highest highs and lowest lows.
Even if everything else turns out to be the same, without that emotion, that is not the same ending.
10) Theories. I can’t help you with theories, sorry, I hate 90% of ASOIAF theories, but can I interest you in some analysis? I want to talk about bath houses in ASOIAF, Jaime’s loss of faith, Roose and Fahrenheit 451, Jason Lannister, Tywin and remarriage… There’s still lots of things to talk about in ASOIAF. I’m just getting started. Maybe this is just me, but I can entertain myself on the current ASOIAF content for years, I’m mostly self-sufficient here.
11) The show. It’s coming. We all know it’s coming.
But that means it’s almost over. We’re almost there. It’s the final push. Our time of testing is almost over. We’re so close. This isn’t a time for despair; this is a time for rejoicing.
[The peach] was so small she could almost hide it in her palm, and overripe too, but when she took the first bite, the flesh was so sweet she almost cried. She ate it slowly, savoring every mouthful, while Ser Jorah told her of the tree it had been plucked from, in a garden near the western wall.
“Fruit and water and shade,” Dany said, her cheeks sticky with peach juice. “The gods were good to bring us to this place.”
You wanna know what I love about ASOIAF?
Vaes Tolorro. These past few weeks, I’ve seen it on the horizon, drawing nearer every day.
So have faith. Be strong. Be steadfast.
We’re gonna make it through.
The Winds of Winter is waiting for us on the other side.
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Okay, so, hi everyone? I’ve gotten some new followers, which is a bit surprising, and I’m sure some of you are aware of the discourse currently happening the mdzs fandom. Normally, as my about page states, I will not participate in fandom discourse under any circumstances, but as I was personally signaled out in this, I’ll be making an exception just this once. I’ll be placing everything under a cut just so those of you who don’t want this discourse showing up on your dash can avoid it.
Okay, so if you’re unaware, a blocklist was recently created of people in the fandom that minors should avoid/be aware of. I, as well as one of my good fandom friends, was on this list. I will not be posting links to said list in any way, shape, or form, as I believe it is poorly worded and just wholely not handled well in its original context.
I’d like to preface this entire post with one important idea: you curate your own fandom experience. I actually encourage blocking/blacklisting things and people who make you uncomfortable, just be respectful about it. You don’t need to announce it, or let someone know you’re blocking them. If I in any way make you uncomfortable for any reason, and you are uncomfortable talking to me about it to try and fix the problem, then please unfollow me, block me, or whatever will make you the most happy and comfortable. In the end, fandom is about fun, and it shouldn’t be taken too seriously. It shouldn’t be used to hurt people.
I can’t say I’m not upset that I and my friend were included, and while I don’t know most of the people on that list enough to make a judgment, based on the reasons my friend and I were listed, I don’t believe the judgment of the original creator of the list was wholly sound. For full transparency, I am going to include why I, personally, was signaled out.
The first reason is for my submission here: https://mxtxpositivity.tumblr.com/post/183334608470/fic-rec-realize-what-you-never-knew-by
The fic I recommended is a fic that the friend I previously mentioned wrote, and I recommended it because I enjoy it and I enjoy supporting my friend’s writing. Now, the fic in question is about the junior trio, but it is written in a context where they are older and not minors. To be fair, my friend did not tag for this, and the lack of a tag for it was not something that I, as her beta, caught, either. I don’t particularly intend to debate whether or not it’s okay to write sexual content about young characters after they’ve been aged up, as it’s a rather gray area and whether it will bother you will vary. If it does bother you, however, that’s perfectly valid and I encourage you to avoid it. Blacklisting is a wonderful thing, and ao3 now includes a function to exclude ships.
The second reason I was signaled out in this post is for this: http://hypermoyashi.tumblr.com/tagged/yaoi
And just so it’s clear that I have not altered or cleared this in any way, here’s a screenshot with the time and date in the corner:
I would scroll down to show you guys more of the tag, but there is none. My yaoi tag is just two posts. This is the basis for which I was said to “support yaoi.” I’d like to point out that one post is literally a criticism of the genre as a whole. I have no idea why I tagged the second post as yaoi, but it was reblogged three years ago. It is not something I would reblog and tag that way today. I’ve used the same blog, the same username, for well over seven years now. There is bound to be some stuff here that doesn’t reflect who I am today, and there is also bound to be things that I’ve mistagged or not tagged appropriately in the past. I do not have the energy to clean absolutely everything out, but if you would like to point something out to me, I will be happy to change it. For my purposes, I’m not going to be altering my yaoi tag, in case anyone wants to check it for themselves.
Now, just as an off-topic, I’d like to point out that I’m bi/gray ace. I don’t hate yaoi per say, but I do dislike the picture its common tropes paint of the lgbtqa+ community, as anyone who has spoken with me for five minutes about it can tell you.
This is all I was flagged for, but in the name of transparency, I am also going to include something that, had our original poster of the list seen, would’ve been additional reasons for me to land on the list.
I am writing an A.B.O. fic for HOB. It will also contain an explicit scene in the future, and it contains some pretty heavy triggers such as attempted suicide and CSA/abuse. I know A.B.O. tends to be controversial for many, many reasons, but for the record, all characters retain their full facilities during any and all explicit scenes, on or off screen, and are able to consent or not consent to what is going on. Anything of that nature that happens to a minor does not happen on screen and is appropriately tagged as CSA. I also do not endorse or want minors reading this fic, but I’ll get into that later.
Now, does any of this disprove that I’m a potential danger to minors? No, it does not.
For one, disproving a negative is an impossibility. To demonstrate this, I’ll be using the same analogy my statistics teacher used. You have a field. You’re looking for cows. To find some cows, you divide the field up into twenty sections. Unfortunately, you only have the capability to check five of the sections. You check these five sections, and you don’t find any cows. Can you say, for sure, that there are no cows in the field? Nope. Because it’s impossible to check every section, and there could be cows in the sections you don’t check.
I cannot open up the entirety of my memory and history to prove that I have definitely never hurt a minor. It is absolutely never my intention, and if I have, I deeply apologize for it. But I have no way of disproving a negative because it is mathematically impossible.
Now that we’ve gotten up to this point, some of you might be thinking, isn’t treating such a baseless accusation so seriously, in a way, giving it validity? Well, in a way, sort of. The accusation is entirely baseless, yes, and this is going to be the only time I’m going to argue something like this in this way. It upset me, and it’s there, so I want to address it.
Now, I’m going to reference my about page. Here it is:
The text reads, “Hello! I thought, after about five years of owning this blog, give or take, it was probably time to make an about page.
“I mainly write fanfiction, which is almost always posted to ao3 and linked here unless it’s particularly short. Minors are definitely welcome; I don’t reblog or post N**SFW images or videos, nor do I write smut, though please be aware that this blog is “view at your own risk.” I tag for common triggers and potentially harmful content, so it’s up to you to know your limits and blacklist appropriately. That being said, if you need me to tag anything in addition to what I already do, please don’t hesitate to ask!
“My fandoms right now are mainly Bungou Stray Dogs, Heaven Official’s Blessing, Mo Dao Zu Shi, Hakata Tonkotsu Ramens, Pandora Hearts, Vanitas no Carte, Akatsuki no Yona, and D.Gray-man. Please be aware that although I do have particular ships I like, I’m not really that into shipping as a whole.
“I don’t reblog shipping discourse nor will I interact with hostile shippers. If you would like to talk about shipping with me, please do, just be nice! As a bonus, I love platonic relationships, so please talk with me about those if you enjoy them, too.
“ところで、私の日本語はちょっとわるいですけど、話すのが好きです。
“Finally, I consider this blog to be a safe place for me and others that does not discriminate based on race, gender identity, sexual orientation, mental health, physical ability, national origin, or religion. If that bothers you, please click the “back” or “x” button on your browser.
“With all that out of the way, welcome to my blog! I love talking with people, so feel free to message me or leave an ask. I swear you won’t be bothering me. Happy blogging!”
Now, I am going to edit this at some point, because I have written smut now. It’s not posted, but it’s still something I intend to post. But yeah, as of 3/13 around 5pm, that was my about page, and I have not changed it for quite a while. (Sorry I’m not quite as chipper today ^^”)
One of the links on my about page leads to this page:
Which reads:
A quick guide to my tagging system!
my fanfiction: stuff I’ve written
text post: stuff I’ve made/said
q: things posted from my queue (it is a very long queue)
art by op: If there’s no source, then I’m reasonably certain that this art was created by the original poster. If I’m wrong, please let me know and I’ll delete it imeidiately.
icons: whenever I save an icon, whether I use it or not, I reblog it under this tag
personal and/or ramblings: just me talking. Sometimes I won’t even tag these kinds of posts
— mention: normally reserved for common triggers, i.e. “Donald Trump mention” or “sex mention”
n**sfw warning: as stated in my about page, I don’t reblog n**sfw images or videos, but I do reblog n**sfw fic recs (ie links to explicit content) that is unsuitable for minors. If you’re a minor viewing my blog, please blacklist this tag if you feel the need to!
spoilers: anything and everything I think constitutes a spoiler. Sometimes I’m bad about tagging these, though. I don’t tag for specific fandoms, like “su spoilers” or “bsd spoilers,” so please beware of that.
And, for reference, this is the basis for which I generally rate my fics:
G (General Audiences): Anyone can read this
T (Teen Audiences): Anyone 13+ can read this
M (Mature Audiences): Anyone 17/18+ can read this (16 is fine, too, I think, depending on what the reader is comfortable with. My M rated fics often include dark/sexual themes, though, so 17/18 is the more comfortable range)
E (Explicit): Only people who are 18+ should read this (probably not gonna rate anything this since I don’t write smut unless I just really don’t want to endorse any minors reading it)
Again, this should probably be updated as I have written smut, however infrequent. I try to tag for common triggers, and I have asked here that minors under a certain age not read particular fics. All of my fics that depict unhealthy relationships, darker or sexual themes, or anything that I would be uncomfortable with a minor reading are rated Mature or Explicit, depending.
So all in all, I have tried my best to provide a positive experience to anyone who enjoys my content, and I try to tag so that potentially harmful content doesn’t reach those that it might hurt. I’m not perfect, and I can’t control everything. A minor can still go in and read my Explicit/Mature fics on ao3, no matter how much or how loudly I ask them not to. My content is meant to inspire, to show that life can suck, but in the end, everyone is worth it and continue on.
And, on that caveat, I’d like to point out that I generally take a stance of “create and let create.” Freedom of expression is the greatest gift anyone can be given. Yes, avoid content that hurts you, but please don’t lash out at those who create it. Until you know exactly why they’ve created it, what their history is, and what thoughts or feelings they were working through while creating it, please leave them be. Creators should tag their works so people can avoid content that might be harmful to them, but content that is harmful to one person might be another person’s lifeline.
But the reason I’ve laid this all out is that I want you to judge for yourself. Do I seem like someone you want to be friends with? Do I seem like someone harmful? Do I seem like someone you are indifferent to? Please make the decision that is best for you, and if you happen to want to be friends, please let me know ^^
Now, finally, I hope to see a more positive fandom experience come of this. I say all this, however negative or bleak it might be for me, because it was important for me to work through my thoughts, and I hope that something positive can come of honesty and communication.
Please don’t go after the original poster of the list, if you know who they are. It’s better just to let it go. The person seemed to have had good intentions, however ill-executed they were, and talking to them is only going to create more ill will and negativity for everyone. I believe, at least in part, the reason their list is so unfounded and baseless is because the content they cited genuinely hurts them, and when creating the list, they did not look at the full context of everything they were citing. And, well, context is everything, really. This doesn’t really excuse them, as they still hurt people with a largely unhelpful and thoughtless post, but brewing the negative feelings helps no one. I would also like to state that the fact that the content hurts them is not the fault of any of the creators. If you tag appropriately, but someone doesn’t take the time to blacklist or otherwise protect themself from content they know will hurt them, then that’s on them.
Fandom is a really interesting place. It’s full of so many diverse and wonderful people--minors and adults, lgbtqa+ and allies, tons of different nationalities--we should really take more steps to look out for one another. If there’s anything I could be doing better, please let me know. My experience with the mdzs fandom hasn’t been great up to this point, and I want to change that. I love this show, and I also want to love the people who love it alongside me.
Remember, for every not so great person, there are twenty more lovely people just waiting to meet you. And I hope that, from here on, those lovely people get every good thing they deserve.
#discourse#csa mention#abuse mention#rape mention#suicide mention#really if you have any super common triggers please don't read this#not tagging the fandom#and it probably wont show up in the tags because looong#but yeah here is my only participation in discourse#id prefer no reblogs#but feel free to reply#or message me
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Questions for Muns of Canon Muses
it long
What is the general opinion of your muse’s fandom about them? Do you agree with it?
I...honestly don’t know what it is as a general rule. “Pure cinnamon roll” I agree with 100%, but further specifics that people think of him, I couldn’t say because for whatever reason, I...don’t actually know??? More often, I see reactions on the show itself than the characters (which swings wildly from Tumblr’s general saltier-than-ramen that made me so worried about cancellation to Facebook’s almost overwhelming praise). It honestly seems like the most vocal third of people on Tumblr still watching it hate it with the passion they hate Fifty Shades, and a bunch of people have “given up” on it like they got disgusted with it like it was this vile thing that personally victimized them. So generally I try to avoid fandom opinions because I know they’ll bring me down. I mean, I’ve had to unfollow people whose blog turned into “let’s call out this show as bad, horrible everything” every tuesday night, even though I still want to RP with them. I just can’t handle something I love so much being put down by more people than lift it up, it makes me feel like they look down on me for liking it. I get enough of that with my dad, I don’t need it here.
Got off-topic there, whoops.
Bottom line: Fitz is a precious cinnamon roll with endearing but borderline unsettling obsessiveness. His jealousness/protectiveness over Simmons makes a lot more sense now that we know his dad mistreated his mum. He’s brilliant, he’s kind, he’s insecure, and he’s a brilliant and very human character.
For movie or TV muses, what is a scene with your muse that you hate? Why? Can you show a screenshot?
Note: I haven’t seen much of season three on a rewatch. Most of s4 is still fairly fresh in my head, but not all.
Hate is a very strong word. I’m not sure there’s any scenes that I hate, but there are a few scenes I would have planned if not written a bit better.
I don’t like in 2x12 when May snapped at Fitz while he was watching her and Daisy spar. There was no real reason for that. May had been providing the kind of support that I think Fitz needed--encouraging but not pushing, not coddling but not “buck up and get to work”, not accidentally patronizing him but also not expecting him to be like he was before--and it wasn’t like she and Daisy were talking about anything private. She knew he was self-isolating and had been for months. She knew he needed to feel like the valuable part of the team that he’d recently proven he could still be, so why did she snap?
*shyly* “I just wanted to see what it’s all about.”*threateningly* “Why don’t you come back in an hour and I’ll show you?”
That was incredibly uncalled for. If she and Daisy had been talking about something private, then I could understand, but if I remember correctly, it was mostly about emotional control, and they hadn’t gone into any private details.
Honorable mention to 4x08
It’s just a very split second after AIDA gets shot, but FitzSimmons are the science babies, the meek-but-fierce brainboxes--who the hecky decided they should use real guns to mercilessly and without a second thought later kill the guy who shot AIDA? Yes, it was self-defense, but they knew the guns wouldn’t work on Eli, the cronies he was working with should have been ICEd for proper justice stuff later. That’s the whole reason the ICERs were invented--kill when you have to, but if you don’t, don’t. A very simple prop alteration that wouldn’t need explanation could have saved that moment. You shouldn’t have someone like them unflinchingly shoot in self-defense and then two minutes later, worry about the android being in pain, and then have him agonize over killing people half a season later. A guy like Fitz wouldn’t care if he knew the deceased or not, dead is dead.
What plots/interactions leave you feeling protective of your muse?
In the show? How long do I have? Granted, I have done some pretty screwed up things to my own muses (sorry not sorry Sherlock, you’re especially to mess with), but pretty much any time Fitz gets betrayed, I’m like OH HAIIIIIL NO, STEP OUT THE WAY, YOU BOUT TO GET SOME SCHOOLIN FOOL.
RP-wise, pretty much any new interaction I’m protective of his feelings. Squishy soul with a big heart.
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