#I sorta feel like I’ve known him forever bc I’m so comfortable talking to him
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sunflowergirl522 · 9 months ago
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Hey guys gonna ramble for a minute in the tags about my updated love life bc I’m gonna scream
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boognish-worshipper · 3 years ago
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Remember the Rain
praying this is the final part of “Sunrise, Sunset” by the time i’m done omg ,, lamar finally talks it out with frank. i was tryna keep the titles consistent with a sky theme? wasn’t sure what to name this one at first, but i settled on naming it after a i song that i felt was sorta fitting lol ,, also lamar’s dramatic when drunk, that’s jus how it’s gonna be
oh and i included one last convo w/ that psychic lady bc each character got three opportunities to speak to her lol
//
The night Franklin and him fought was the third night in a row Lamar couldn’t sleep right. Then it became four. Then five. Six. He had hoped after the first couple days of Franklin being mad, that it’d all blow over and things would go back to normal. That he wouldn’t ever have to say anything about what he felt deep down. Even though he told himself he had to, he wouldn’t. He waited it out, and still hoped it would all just fucking blow over. That wasn’t what happened of course.
An overcast sky was spread over LS, light rain tapping against Lamar’s window. As cheesy as it was, it reflected how he felt. Another day had passed. Franklin wasn’t picking up, not even reading his texts, nothing. He called a couple times at first when the fourth day of the silent treatment occurred, then tried a few more times to contact him in the following days. It had grown into a long and sad string of texts.
franklin.
dog
plz
pick up
answer me
plz?
c’mon frank i told you i have nothin goin on with yo auntie
i wanna talk things out with you.
u ain’t let me finish explaining
text me when u read this. plz bro
He sighed. This was hopeless. He set his phone aside, still laying awake. A buzz came right after. Fucking finally, something.
fuck you
we got nothin to discuss
He didn’t know how to feel. This was fucking him up and he couldn’t think straight. He tried calling him once more, the ringing as he waited for a pick up mocking him. Voicemail yet again. How many messages had he tried leaving at this point?
for fucks sake frank pick up
u ain’t doin this to me rn
jus let me explain myself
He stared at the ceiling yet again, like it would have all the answers sprawled out for him. As he did, he focused on how the rain had picked up, coming down harder. Then he felt his phone buzz.
no
now stop blowing my phone up
i’m tryna sleep
Lamar was never one to be sensitive, but he felt so crushed right now that all he could do was cry silently to himself. He didn’t even have Chop around anymore to comfort him like he normally would whenever Lamar was going through something. Would he even see him again? He lived over at Frank’s now. Fuck. Did this mean they’d have to share custody now? If he wasn’t so upset, he most likely would’ve laughed at the idea of it. He was letting bad thoughts consume him, turning to a last minute resort of drinking to try stopping it. This kind of thing rarely happened to him, these kind of feelings weren’t common. He knew no other method of trying to stuff bad feelings down, working through a 6 pack of beer on his own, followed by a bottle of some type of random liquor. Anything to stifle the pain in his chest, although it didn’t accomplish much other than making him feel even more queasy. He left one last voicemail, choking back a sob. Or what he had thought would be the last one. He lost count.
“Franklin. Please jus’ talk to me already man. You- you believin’ what you wanna believe right now, you ain’t even givin’ me a chance. You my best fuckin’ friend, don’t that mean shit to you anymore? We.. homies n shit.” He sniffled, cringing to himself when he said the words “best friend”. Franklin was so much more than that to him.
“Ion… Ion think I can live without you in my life. You can’t hate me man that shit.. that’s fucked. This is fucked. I’m fucked.”
A strong feeling of humiliation hung around him for many reasons, one being that he was fully crying now, over the phone. He couldn’t get any lower.
“You jus’ mad right now. But you.. you won’t be, eventually. Right? Please get back to me soon. Please. I’d rather fuckin’.. die or sum’ than have you hatin’ me n shit. At this point I might as well.”
After hanging up, he decided to visit that site one last time. His tears blurred his vision, making it harder to type. The shit in his system didn’t help either.
lady
i fuckef up
thsi is yo faukt
What now? Why are you back?
frankljn hates me
He does? That’s not right.
damn straighy it fuckign isnt
No, I mean that’s not correct.
There’s no way that he could, even if it seems like it right now.
jus fuckin tell me whst to do
That’s out of my hands.
is not u fuckin wirch
*withc
*witch
Look, I really don’t know how else to help you. I don’t have any other visions to offer. You’re on your own.
They do say though, that dreams are visions themselves.
dont fukcin speak in riddles rn
Precognition, Lamar. Just have faith
prewhatnow
n yeah. faith. bc that helps so fuckn much
All I can say to you is good luck - it’s all coming together. Just wait.
th fuck does that mean?
It means that you’re stressing too much - you better sleep it off. Farewell Lamar. You’re gonna have a killer hangover you know…
SERVICE UNAVAILABLE. PLEASE TRY AGAIN LATER.
The notification did nothing but make him more upset. He calmed down eventually, the crying and alcohol tiring him out. He blacked out soon after, not remembering when he fell asleep.
For the first time in a while, he dreamt about the two of them. The start of the dream showed a radiant sight before them, the sky lit up in a million shades. Chop was laying beside Franklin, head on his thigh. All three of them sat on a grassy knoll, a soft breeze blowing through each blade. Franklin turned, Lamar not taking his eyes off him since the dream started. He only noticed the sky’s wide color palette because the intensity struck Franklin’s face just right. He looked right into Lamar’s eyes, speaking softly.
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
“What?”
“You had so many opportunities. So many times, I thought that you would. I got my hopes up, you know. I waited. When Tanisha left.. I only had you.”
“Tanisha..”
“I still love her. I.. I think apart of me always will, but I love you just the same. Even if you drive me up a Goddamn wall sometimes. You both mean the world to me.”
Franklin looked back at the view ahead. A heavenly indigo replaced the vivid hues from before.
“But she’s gone now. Shit ain’t the same. All I know is you stayed when she didn’t. Even when she got pulled outta the hood and made some kinda new life for herself, you never left my side. Never changed yo loyalties.”
He turned back to face Lamar again. His eyes were glassy, the glow of the midnight sky reflecting in them.
“So why didn’t you say somethin’ sooner?”
“Franklin.. I ain’t deduce that shit ‘til now.“
“You really didn’t know?”
Even in the dream he could feel that previous frustration occur in his mind. Was he hiding in a glass closet or something? He could only let out a wry laugh.
“Yeah man. I was a fuckin’ fool, jus’ like you always said.”
“Damn straight.” He chuckled, and Lamar came to the conclusion that he could listen to that laugh forever. Franklin’s face then fell solemn.
“Y’know I really thought that.. I really thought that you jus’ got with someone else. Not even jus’ my Aunt. I saw how you wanted to get away from me, and I thought…” He stopped himself, petting Chop’s head.
“I.. wanted to be happy if you was, but the thought of that at all bothered me.”
“Why?”
“Cuz you were all I had, dog. Mike n Trevor, they have their own lives, their own history n shit. I can’t always rely on them. Denise don’t give a fuck what happen to me. You my lifeline dog, I’ve known you for years. I didn’t want you to forget me over a chick or sum’. That day you acted all different n shit, it worried me.”
“Hey man, y’know I ain’t ever gon pull that shit on you. I’m with you for life.”
“Then don’t pull other kinda stupid shit on me.”
“Whatchu mean?”
“You can’t ever die on me bro. That ain’t how this shit works.”
“Ay man, I don’t plan on dying jus’ yet. Not unless yo ass by my side. Not ‘til I tell you I…” He couldn’t finish the sentence.
Franklin got closer to his face, cupping his cheek. His eyes shone as the stars around them fell from the sky, akin to raindrops, hitting them. Everything about him was flooding Lamar’s senses, and it felt surreal, between his aroma and all the other things he loved about Franklin. Golden flecks covered them both, and the stars continued to crash down. The sky was growing darker than before.
“Just say the words Lamar. Say them and this shit’ll be over.”
“How?”
“Well first you need to wake yo ass up.”
“Huh?”
“I said wake up, fool!”
Lamar’s blissful dream had been interrupted by an unknown figure shaking him, literal raindrops hitting his face. He was still bleary eyed, only seeing a vague silhouette in front of him. A wet slap to the face rattled his brain around, the hangover settling in. Shit, was he still drunk? What time was it?
“Lamar! Get up!”
“Oh.. Th’fuck? Who- who that is?” He grunted out.
“It’s me you fuckin’ clown!”
“Frank?”
“Who the fuck else?”
“Why are you-”
He was abruptly yanked out of bed, thudding to the floor with a small “oof”.
“Get up you punk bitch!”
“Franklin what the fuck-”
He was grabbed again, tossed back onto his bed. Franklin straddled him, shaking Lamar by the collar.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” He said, Lamar getting another slap to the face.
“What in the fresh fuck is you talkin’-” Another slap.
“15 fuckin’ missed phone calls! 15! Are you fuckin’ nuts?!”
Lamar’s eyes practically popped out of his head. 15? What the fuck did he say to him?
“I did what-”
Franklin shook him even harder by his shirt, stretching the material out. He was straining his voice now.
“You had me worried like fuckin’ crazy! I thought you was in some sorta fuckin’ trouble again! You blew my phone up when I told yo ass not to, and then didn’t fuckin’ pick up after I heard the first couple special messages you left me!”
Oh God. This was it. He told Franklin everything, didn’t he? The color drained from his face.
“Oh fuck me..” He mumbled, putting a hand over his eyes.
“What?!” Franklin yelled, shaking him again. Lamar’s head was pounding.
“Franklin.. what.. what I say on there? I barely remember a thing, let alone callin’ yo ass.”
“You seriously don’t fuckin’ remember?!”
“Yeah. Seriously, man.”
Franklin slid off of him, putting a palm to his face. He breathed through his nose hard, trying to calm down. Lamar realized he was drenched from the small downpour outside. Pellets of rain thumped against the window as a reminder that the storm never went away.
“You.. fuck, man. You started sayin’ all this shit about how bad a fuckin’ friend you was. That you, you was hidin’ all this shit and couldn’t live another day without tellin’ me.”
Okay. Good. He didn’t tell him the truth.
“You told me you wanted to die dog. Didn’t realize yo dumbass was safe n sound asleep in yo fuckin’ bed.”
“Oh.”
“…’Oh’? Is that really all you have to say?!”
“F, I was jus’ drunk. It was dumb of me, I know, but I.. It’s nothing, okay?”
“Don’t do this shit to me man! I’ve already dealt with enough of yo fuckin’ schemes n shit-”
“Frank.”
“It’s 3 am! You had Chop barkin’ his Goddamn head off the whole night!”
“Franklin.”
“Then I race my ass over here to find yo drunkass self passed out in bed-”
“Franklin.”
“What! What?! You finally gonna put yo two cents in for once?”
“Stop yelling. My head hurts like a bitch right now.”
“Good! I’m fuckin’ glad because I know mine does as well you fuckin’ asshole!”
Lamar looked pathetically up at him. This was getting out of hand. He let it go on for too long.
“Why did you come here then?” He croaked.
“Because you were fuckin’ sobbin’ into the phone! All I heard was you cryin’ like mad fuckin’ crazy and it scared me. You don’t ever do that shit, not even when you fucked up.”
“How much I say?”
“I got the first message pretty fuckin’ clear, the rest was jus’ incoherent bullshit. I barely got through the second one before speedin’ on over. You sounded hurt n shit, I thought something happened. I thought you was a goner.”
“No weird shit though right? I ain’t say nothin’ bad?”
“What? Lamar, what the fuck are you on about? I just told you what yo ass cried out to me! I couldn’t even understand any of the other messages!”
“Okay, okay. That’s.. good I guess.”
“That’s good? Fuckin’ hell, why did I come here? You- ugh!”
“Franklin. Can you jus’ sit down before you pop a fuckin’ blood vessel? You stressin’ for nothin’.”
If anything, Lamar should be the one stressing right now. He had been so close to confessing without knowing. Franklin sat next to him, arms crossed.
“Franklin.”
“What.”
“I’m sorry that I scared you. I didn’t mean to.”
“Well good fuckin’ job, you accomplished that real well didn’t you.” He said, sarcastically applauding him.
“I thought you were cutting me off for good homie. You think I was gon’ let that happen?”
“Lamar, that still ain’t a good reason to freak me out like that in the middle of the night.”
“It’s only cuz you hadn’t been listenin’ to me bro. I’ve been wanting to tell you somethin’ so badly lately and I never.. got the chance.”
“Then do pray fuckin’ tell LD, what the fuck is so important that you had to do this shit to me at 3 AM!”
“Franklin man, c’mon-”
“No! Don’t start!”
Franklin stood, heading for the door as he spoke. He stopped in the threshold.
“Tell me what the fuck is goin’ on with you, or I’m leavin’ yo sad ass here to wallow. I mean it L.”
“Don’t be like that. Please man. I want to, but I-”
“Jus’ fuckin’ tell me! Why won’t you tell me?!”
“Frank-”
“I dragged my ass all the way over here for nothin’ didn’t I? You ain’t dead, you ain’t sayin’ shit, you jus’ bein’ so- ugh! Fuck!” He threw his hands up, exiting Lamar’s bedroom.
“I’m done man, fuck this.”
“Franklin wait- don’t go-” He pleaded.
Franklin did nothing but leave him stranded again, thunder rolling far in the distance. Lamar ran after him as he walked out the door, hearing the rain heavily hit the pavement. His mind was racing far ahead of him. Franklin was leaving, he was leaving for good, and he couldn’t. He can’t. That’s not how it’s supposed to work. Franklin can’t do that, he can’t-
His mind had gone so far away, that he didn’t even realize that he had tackled Franklin to the ground. The two of them fell to the ground with a loud splat, followed by sounds of pain.
“Lamar what the fuck?!”
“Don’t go! Fuckin’ hell, I gotta chase yo ass and for what?!”
“Get off me dog!”
“No!” Franklin was pinned beneath him. The raindrops that rolled off of Lamar hit him in the face.
It reminded Lamar of when they were younger, playing football or whatever sport they could outside even as the deluge soaked them both to the bone. The roles had been reversed, with Franklin constantly knocking him down onto the grassy sludge. They got quite an earful from Lamar’s mom as they tracked mud in the house upon returning. It was a memory amongst many that stuck with him like glue. Those memories couldn’t go away. Franklin couldn’t go away.
Tears mixed in with the rain as he yelled out to him.
“You fuckin’ idiot! Why you makin’ this shit so hard for me?! You keep leavin’ before I can even finish!”
Franklin struggled to break free from Lamar’s grip on his wrists, huffing as he looked away.
“Look at me!” Lamar shouted, grabbing his face with a free hand.
“I didn’t wanna fuckin’ tell you like this, but Jesus Christ! For fucks sake you stubborn asshole-”
He was doing it. He bit the fucking bullet.
“You know how we got into that fuckin’ argument last week? When I told you that I was dealin’ with that whole love thing, I wasn’t talkin’ about yo Aunt, a hoe, nobody else! I was talkin’ about you!”
Lamar threw himself off of him, stumbling backwards. Franklin propped himself onto his elbows. He finally said it. He said it, and he was far from finished.
“But you didn’t wanna fuckin’ listen! And now I’ve fucked our friendship over for a second time! All because of you! This whole thing has been drivin’ me fuckin’ insane lately, and I couldn’t do shit about it! I tried so, so hard to avoid this, but nothin’ ever goes my way, huh?! Every time I think a plan of mine’ll work, it doesn’t! You know why?!”
Opening his arms wide, he spoke loud and clear, finishing his rant.
“Lemme remind you: I’m Lamar fuckin’ Davis! The biggest fuckin’ fool, fuckin’ clown, fuckin’ whatever you wanna call me! Lamar Davis, the most naïve bitch on the planet! Fuck me for thinking that this would ever go well!”
Now it was his turn to leave. But he didn’t go back into his house. His legs moved for him, walking in no particular direction. He just needed to get away from Franklin, not caring about how damp his clothes were now. He was shaking, and he didn’t know if it was from the rain or the range of emotions he was flying through.
He could hear a pair of sneakers squishing behind him. Franklin was running, and he was catching up fast.
“Ay Lamar! Get back here!”
Oh fuck. He was chasing after him now. That’s not good. Lamar started running himself, not caring about possibly slipping and falling on his ass. Only a few hours ago, he had told himself he couldn’t be without Franklin. Now all he wanted to do was run away.
“Lamar!”
Fuck fuck fuck.
He wasn’t fast enough. The second time they hit the ground, Lamar had the wind knocked right out of him, the duo splashing right into a puddle. Hands gripped his shoulders, flipping him around.
“Lamar!”
There were only a few instances in his life where Lamar felt small. He’d always been big in character, big in height, and according to him, big in other ways. But this was one of those moments where he couldn’t help but flinch, wanting to collapse in on himself. He was so tired.
“If you gon’ beat my ass or somethin’ jus’ get it over with.” He sighed, shutting his eyes tight.
When he felt nothing but raindrops touch his face, he opened his eyes slowly. His heart sank when he did. Franklin was visibly upset, guilt in his eyes.
“Lamar. Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
A wave of déjà vu washed over him. Oh. So that’s what precognition meant. Motherfucking psychic lady.
“You should’ve jus’ told me man.”
“I tried dog. You wouldn’t hear me out.”
“Cuz I.. I thought you got with someone. I didn’t wanna hear it straight from yo mouth if you was.”
He shifted up, Frank sitting in his lap.
“Y’know I always thought that.. Part of me jus’ kinda thought that it’d always be the two of us. I’m never gonna get Tanisha back.. but you..”
Franklin looked away.
“You a crazy ass loyal motherfucker man. You stuck by my side no matter what, and some dumbass part of me was convinced that you… I mean fuck, so many times I thought you would jus’ flat out say something. Somethin’ so I could stop waiting for the one other person I had known forever to just say that they fuckin’ loved me like that.”
Lamar blinked, rainwater getting into his eyes. It wasn’t quite as serene as his dream had been, nor was it verbatim, but Lamar didn’t care. There was something about the way the water droplets sat along Franklin’s face, highlighted by a streetlight behind him that made him look angelic.
“When you started actin’ all weird it jus’.. made me so fuckin’ mad man. I thought you was gon’ pick someone else over me. Jus’ like Tanisha did.”
“Franklin..”
“So why didn’t you jus’ say somethin’ sooner? I waited. Hell, I don’t even know why I did at first.”
“Franklin.”
“But now I’m realizin’ you must not have even noticed yoself what you was feelin’, when I fuckin’ did. I noticed and you didn’t and-”
Lamar grabbed him by the face, grip surprisingly strong after being in the rain.
“How many times do I gotta say yo name for you to hear me?”
The rain kept falling, never slowing for either one of them. Yet, it felt like time stopped. Lamar chuckled lightly.
“Franklin Clinton and Lamar Davis. Two of the dumbest motherfuckers in LS. Homies for life.”
“Yeah. Homies for life.”
His hands never left Franklin’s face. He pressed their foreheads together, lowering his voice.
“I love you, bum ass bitch.”
“Yeah yeah. I love you too.”
He kissed the top of his head, moving his hands down to embrace him in a tight hug. When was the last time they did this? As he thought it over, he could hear Franklin’s voice muffled against his chest.
“Don’t scare me like that again. Next time save us both the trouble n jus’ spill yo heart out. Dramatic motherfucker.”
The words had no malice in them, Lamar feeling him smile as he said it. He kissed him once more, and they just sat in the rain, feeling it bathe them in fond memories.
//plz listen to remember the rain by 21st century it’s so good 💔😭 anyway ya i decided to end it on a sorta happy note !!!!! franklin is a stubborn guy smh,, sorry for any typos lol also i rlly had no idea where i wanted to go with this so sorry if it’s weird or whatever
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rugbybi · 6 years ago
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weird passwords // tom x reader one-shot
this is my first piece of writing that i’ve ever posted on here and it’ll probs be crap bc i’m not creative in any way but i’d die for bonzi so here goes nothing
for: em’s 3k writing challenge. love u, @noir-spiderr
summary // roommate!tom has a weird password on his laptop and you honest to god don’t know why you’re attracted to him
pairing // tom holland x reader
warnings // swearing, sexual themes (like no actual smut but, like, you’ll see)
word count // 1,497
prompts // 2. “why is that your password” ((and also bonzi let me use 9. “for some reason, i’m attracted to you”))
the prompts will be bolded 
Having been roommates for the past two years, Y/N should’ve been used to seeing her best friend naked with how often it happens. But it’s always a surprise when it happens. And most of the times, it’s your fault.
“Tom,” you shout while looking away, “what the fuck?!”
“Y/N!! Don’t look!! Please, for god’s sake, don’t look.” Tom panics on the spot before covering himself with his towel, “What the fuck are you doing in my room anyway?”
“My laptop died and I need to check my emails and I don’t know where my phone is, so I was wondering if I could use your laptop but I don’t know if I want it anymore.”
Tom gives you a blank look before turning away and rolling his eyes. That look would be forever ingrained in your memory from how many times you’ve seen him do it. 
“Yeah, whatever, take it. Knock yourself out-“
“Thanks, Tom, I-“
“Literally.” He deadpans, turning back to glare at you.
You grin and run over to kiss him on the cheek, “I was gonna say I owe you one but…”
Tom rolls his eyes again as Y/N shrugs and walks over to Tom’s desk, picking up the laptop before walking out of Tom’s room, leaving him to finally get dressed. You walk into your living room and sit down on the couch, placing Tom’s laptop beside you. Just as you were about to open Tom’s laptop, he walks out of his room, clothed thankfully, and makes his way towards the kitchen.
‘Please offer some tea, please offer some tea,’ you think, as you had forgotten to make yourself a cup before you sat down, and, well, you’re comfortable where you are.
“HEY Y/N, DO YOU WANT SOME TEA?” Tom yells from the kitchen.
“Fuck yeah, I’d like some tea,” you respond excitedly. Already knowing what the follow up question will be, you add, “Whatever type you’re having will be fine, my dear.”
You and Tom weren’t strangers to using pet names and such for each other, it was just part of your friendship and you were like that with all of your friends and he was too, probably. You weren’t sure. You just knew it had been part of your relationship with him for the past 4 years that you’ve known him, platonic with pet names, but you weren’t so sure that your feelings were strictly platonic anymore. You had started to feel butterflies whenever you saw him or thought of him, he was the first thing you thought about when you woke up and the last person to cross your mind as you fell asleep. You didn’t completely hate that you walked in on him just after his shower, and you never really mind when he walks around the apartment shirtless. Or, well, you haven’t minded for the past year since you acknowledged your feelings for him. You’re fairly certain Harrison, Tom’s best friend and the person who introduced the two of you, knows of your feelings for Tom and if he does, he is incredibly good at hiding it.
Tom shouts out and interrupts your thoughts, simply to ask if you want a snack as well and you shout back your response, saying that you were fine. As Tom waits for the kettle to boil, you pull his laptop onto your lap and open it and realise you don’t know the password to open it. 
‘Fuck,’ you think, ‘I’m such a dumbass that I forgot to ask for the password.’ 
You hesitate for a moment, but then remember how long you and Tom have been friends and realise that if he hadn’t already figured out that you were occasionally a dumbass, then he was the dumbass in this friendship. 
“Hey Tom,” you call out, and watch as he pokes his head around the corner and smiles at you, “what’s the password for your laptop? Sorta need it to get on.”
“Oh, yeah, of course,” he responds, “it’s ijusthadsex. All lowercase, no spaces.” He grins and pops back into the kitchen, while you sit in shock at how calm and nonchalant his answer was. Nonetheless, you type the password in and immediately gain access. As you gradually start to process what Tom’s password is, he walks into the living room and places two mugs filled with tea on the coffee table and sits on the opposite end of the couch to you. As he’s turning the TV on, you slowly turn to face Tom and just stare at him. 
“Tom,” you say, “I have a quick question to ask you.”
“Yeah, go ahead, darling,” he nods for you to continue on, still looking at the TV.
“Tom- I- Wh- Why is that your password? I mean, what? I mean, thanks for giving it to me and letting me use your laptop but, uh, what kind of password is ijusthadsex?”
Tom turns to look at you, taking in your expression and chuckles. Yeah, you might be reacting a bit dramatic about a simple password but you just have to know. He can’t just say these things and not expect questions.
“When I got the laptop and had to create a password for it, I Just Had Sex by The Lonely Island was stuck in my head for some reason and I decided, hey, why not make this my password for now? I can always change it later. Never got around to changing it and it’s super easy to remember,” he replies, grabbing his cup of tea and blowing on it before taking a sip and putting it down, “Anyway, I’m usually the only one using my laptop so it doesn’t bother me.” 
“You made your laptop password ijusthadsex simply because you had the song stuck in your head?? You seriously couldn’t think of anything else,” you nervously laugh and pick up your tea, “God, and for some reason, I’m attracted to you.”
As you’re bringing your tea up to your mouth, you process what you’ve just said. You pause and slowly turn to look over at Tom, who, you’ve noticed, has also paused. 
‘Oh crap,’ you think, while putting your cup down, ‘How am I gonna talk my way out of this one?’
Tom turns to look at you, with shock and something else in his eyes. Relief, maybe?
“You- you’re attracted to me? Y-You’re really attracted to me? You… like… me,” he utters, hesitantly, with the last sentence seeming to be more of a statement than a question.
“I-I mean, yeah, you’re an attractive guy. Everyone knows that, for sure you know that. I’m not blind. Your curly hair that somehow is always shiny and just always perfect, your gorgeous brown eyes that are like chocolate and just, ugh, are perfect always and especially in the sun. Oh my god, when the sunlight hits your eyes just right, I swear they sparkle and you just look magical. Don’t get me started on your body, fuck, you’re amazing. I mean, are you attractive? Uh, duh. Am I attracted to you? Well, yeah, I can’t really back out of this one, I mean I’ve liked you for the past year, maybe longer, who knows? But, like, I like you so, like, of course I’m attracted to y-”
You’re cut off by Tom leaning over, putting his hands on your cheeks and kissing you. You startle for a second before shutting your eyes, moving your lips against his while moving closer to him. You move to straddle Tom and settle yourself on his lap, making sure your lips don’t separate. The kiss is full of passion and love, and you notice that your stomach isn’t filled with butterflies but rather a never ending fireworks display. You’ve never felt happier than in this moment and you never wanted it to end. Tom disconnects from your lips, but moves his hands to your waist and pulls you even closer and rests his forehead against your own. You can feel his breath on your lips as you move a hand up to his cheek and gently stroke it with your thumb. You move your head up to press a kiss on his forehead, and hug him tightly in a non-verbal way of telling him to never let you go. He laughs softly into your neck where his head is resting and inhales a breath before beginning to speak.
“If you couldn’t tell, I’m attracted to you too. Honestly, I think I have been from the moment we met. Always too much of a wimp to do anything about it though.”
You press another kiss to his forehead before replying, “Well, you’ve done something about it now… And I’m so happy you did.”
You continue hugging, neither of you loosening your grip but neither of you lose your content smiles. Your tea and your emails are long forgotten, nothing really matters in this moment, except for the man in your arms. 
anyways here it is, please be kind
also i’m just gonna tag @noir-spiderr @moonkissedtom and @h-osterfield in this bc idk if anyone else cares and i just want someone to read it kjldgksf
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