#I should’ve posted that yesterday for the valentine’s day but something went wrong

[beashi]

gay people are real pt.2

[yuta1forme]

like magnets | ten

summary: in which you and ten are up and coming choreographers who are forever at each other’s throats. but maybe fighting is just an excuse to get close.

pairing: ten x reader

genre: angsty fluff

warnings: some swearing, alcohol mention, loads of bickering

length: 4.3k

tag list: @sly-merlin​ @animegirl366​ @yonoohcore​

He’s confident to the point of arrogance. He knows exactly how to get under your skin. When the pair of you start fighting, all the other dancers make their way out of the studio, not wanting to get involved in another explosive Y/N-Ten showdown. He counters your every suggestion. He always has more critique for your performances than praise. 

And yet, he is the best dance partner you could ever ask for. He matches your poise with his passion. In dance, you both have found a middle ground. 

When Ten first joined the studio you really wanted to like him. He was a young, up and coming dancer from Thailand. What you had not seen coming was that besides being the same age, you and Ten had precious little in common. The day you first met Ten, you had decided in less than ten seconds that you two would never, to put this lightly, become the “best of friends”. 

You had entered the break room of the studio that day, late and soaking wet because of the heavy downpour that had begun the night before. Hungry and disgruntled, all you had wanted to do was to grab a steaming cup of green tea and the last of your favorite jelly doughnuts. Only the thought of those jelly doughnuts had you hanging on during your hour and forty-five-minute long journey to work this morning. They were your emotional support food, your one and only indulgence. After almost three years at the studio, all the other dancers knew not to touch your jelly doughnuts. All except for the bucket-hat wearing Thai newbie who clearly hadn’t gotten the memo. 

“Those were my doughnuts”, you had barely managed to huff out, focusing your mind on not raising your voice or worse, bursting into tears.

Now, if he had just apologized for eating them without asking you first, you both might not have started off on the wrong foot. No, the fucker just shrugged and said, “Didn’t see your name on them”. No shame in his eyes, not an ounce of regret in his voice. The powdered sugar from your doughnuts still around his mouth and dusted over his all-black ensemble. That fucker.

“So people just waltz into a room and eat someone else’s snacks where you’re from?”, you asked, your pitch becoming shriller with annoyance. 

“No of course not. Because where I’m from, people don’t leave their snacks where everyone can see them, without putting their name on it first”, he replied, cool as a cucumber. 

Taeyong had entered the break room at this point. He took one look at the powdered sugar on Ten’s face and the eyes-gonna-pop-out expression on yours and connected the dots. As one of the senior choreographers in the studio, Taeyong had developed a sixth sense for sniffing out conflicts before they broke out. 

“Y/N! I see you’ve already met Ten! He’s the new dancer from Thailand. Ten this is Y/N”, Taeyong had prompted by way of introductions, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge and inching closer to the door he had entered from. 

“Oh, you’re Y/N. The one who choreographed the last Pink Cashmere comeback, right?”, Ten had asked, suddenly sitting up straight. Seeing that your conversation was turning civil, Taeyong had left the room just as quietly as he had entered it.

“Yes, that would be me”, you had responded. That was your first time working with an idol group and was a milestone in your career. You had spent weeks running on pure adrenaline and Americanos (and the occasional jelly doughnut), spending day and night listening to the new comeback track, reviewing concept photos and looking up old performances to get their style down just right. When you watched the girls perform the choreography for the first time, you were so immensely proud of yourself, you hadn’t stopped beaming for days. 

“I should’ve known it was you, it had your signature footwork style all over it”, Ten had said, nodding his head slightly. You had felt flattered at that, surprised that anyone had even picked up that you had a certain trademark in your choreography.

“But, I thought it was too showy if you know what I mean”, Ten had continued, crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair, a slight frown on his face. 

You were almost embarrassed at how much his words affected you. While you were used to internet trolls taking jabs at your work, it was something entirely different to hear full-blown criticism from your peers. As the youngest choreographer in the studio, you rarely got challenged when it came to choreography, with most of your colleagues wholeheartedly encouraging you to spread your wings and grow no matter the outcome. It probably was not intentional on their part but it had become a fear of yours - what if nobody would outwardly challenge your decisions because they thought you were too weak to handle the truth?

Still, you felt a need to defend your creative decision. You needed to stand up for yourself. “The girls are great dancers and I thought a more challenging choreography would push them out of their comfort zone. Sooji and Maya were actually part of a hip-hop dance crew pre-debut. They were itching to try out a new concept”. 

“But why not use more formations in the dance? It’s an eight-member group. You could’ve used that to your advantage”, Ten had countered. He made a good point. But you didn’t want to concede to him. Who did this man think he was? Walking in here and questioning your vision as a choreographer?, you though to yourself.

“Most of the other girl groups that came back around that time had similar songs but only Pink Cashmere had a distinct choreography. I wanted to make their choreography memorable”, you had said. 

Ten had remained quiet for a while. “I didn’t think of it that way”, he had replied, a thoughtful look on his face. “In that case, I think you succeeded at whatever you set out to do with that choreography.  It was definitely memorable, Y/N.”

He turned his gaze up towards your face and flashed you a sweet smile. He looked like a whole different person, almost innocently brushing powdered sugar off his cheeks like a mischievous cat who had just been caught doing something he shouldn’t have done. 

Your whole first interaction with Ten had confused you. First he walked in acting like he owned the place, critiquing your choreography as if he was a veteran dancer. But then he had just as easily praised your abilities. But at the back of your mind you had this nagging feeling that whatever Ten had said to you was not in an effort to undermine you, unlike some of the backhanded compliments delivered by your peers. He had criticized you because he thought you could take it, because he thought of you as an equal. And you kind of enjoyed that.

Arguing with Ten became a part of your everyday routine thereafter. So did labelling your snacks with your names and leaving passive-aggressive messages on post-it notes.

At nineteen, you gave up a full-ride scholarship to a prestigious law school in your country and moved to Seoul with a single suitcase and your old school backpack in hand. Your family had threatened to cut off contact with you if you left the country, but you left anyway; Your passion for dance was stronger than your fear of losing them. Dance was your first love. You lived and breathed it. Like hell were you giving up on your first love that easy. 

You worked odd jobs during the day and filmed original choreographies for your YouTube channel during the night. After struggling for over a year, your hope slowly dwindling, you got a notification that changed your life. Kim Jongin, one of South Korea’s ballet prodigies had shared one of your videos on Twitter. Your subscriber count had quadrupled overnight, with hundreds of thousands of commenters dubbing you a “prodigy”. Fate brought you to Jongin, who then introduced you to Taeyong, who brought you to SM studios. 

It was a dream come true - for years you had only struggled, floating in dark and murky water, swimming forward towards a hazy future. Now, you had thousands of fans, dozens of supportive friends, and a solid foundation from where you could dream. Your friend Hendery liked to joke that you would need more than twenty-four hours a day if you wanted to do everything in your planner. And truth be told, he was right. You had given up a lot to pursue your dreams. Given up on your family, most of your friends, your home country. You wanted to make sure it was all worthwhile. So you wanted to spend every day making the most of the opportunities that you now had. You went to bed each night with a head full of ideas and woke up every morning with the fire to bring them to life. 

Of course, dedicating your life to your craft came at a cost. The rest of the world had not stopped moving just because you decided to make dance your life. This dawned on you one rosy Valentine’s Day evening, when you, date-less for the fifth year running, quite naively decided to scroll through Instagram. Amongst the sea of pink, flowers and picture-perfect happy couples were two faces that made your stomach instantly drop - your ex and a stunning woman posing for the camera with their fingers intertwined. On her ring finger, a diamond the size of a blueberry. 

You remember the day you broke things off with your ex like it was yesterday. You were at the airport, waiting to get on your flight to Seoul, positively buzzing with nerves. You had waited until you were seated on the plane to send your ex a rather heartless text message saying you were breaking up with him to find yourself and that it was best if he forgot you. Very dramatic, even for you. But you were nineteen and had just watched ‘Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind’. In return he had left you an equally dramatic voicemail, pleading with you to not end the relationship and proclaiming that he would never stop loving you. You had all but laughed at his message then.

You weren’t laughing anymore though. He was happily engaged, while you were lonely, lying in bed on Valentine’s day in a pizza grease-stained sweatshirt. You had spent the last few years working relentlessly which had given you a career that you could be proud of, friends you could rely on. But besides the occasional fling here and there, you didn’t have much in terms of a romantic life. You guessed you deserved this, that karma had finally caught up to you.  Didn’t stop you from feeling like shit though.

So you did what you always did when you felt particularly shitty. You went down to the studio, turned the music on full blast and dove right into a new choreography. You were freestyling, too lost in the moment to hear the door creak open.

“I gotta hand it to you, Y/N, that was pretty impressive!”, a male voice exclaimed. You had spun around expecting to see Sicheng or Hendery at the door. Instead, you were met with a tired but rather amused looking Ten.

He was dressed in a white silk shirt and a pair of black slacks. You noticed the roses in his hands, slightly wilted but still beautiful nonetheless. He was clearly dressed up for a date. He looked striking as always but you didn’t linger too long on that, thinking that it was your romance deprived mind projecting thoughts onto the first attractive male it saw. 

“What are you doing here? It’s Valentine’s day, don’t you have a crowd of screaming fans to attend to?”, you asked sarcastically.

“One date. And they stood me up, actually”, he replied with a bitter smile. He must have been quite upset if he didn’t have a snarky response for you.

You were truly taken aback. Ten? Getting stood up by someone? Ten, who could charm the socks off of anyone he set his eyes on, getting stood up on Valentine’s day? 

“But how?”, you blurted out, instantly regretting it when you saw the quizzical look on Ten’s face. Yet you foolishly continued mumbling, or rather digging yourself deeper into a hole.

“I mean, you’re just...so...you”, you said vaguely gesturing at his whole form. From his boyish good looks to his ability to sweet-talk, Ten’s charms were undeniable. Ever since he joined the studio, the number of signups for the afternoon classes had doubled. Dozens of people would come to the studio every day, just to catch a glimpse of him. And he indulged them all too, flashing them his signature grin or paying them a cheeky compliment. If only you weren’t all too familiar with the way he could run his mouth during an argument, you too might have fallen for his charms. 

“Sorry to disappoint you, Y/N, but I’m not quite the Casanova you expected me to be. But I will take that as a compliment”, he said with a wink that had you resisting the urge to roll your eyes.

“Still doesn’t explain what you’re doing here though”, you mumbled out.  

“I like to choreograph at night. I think I’m my most creative after midnight. Besides I just got my heart broken and I should channel that emotional energy somewhere right?”, Ten said feigning nonchalance. You could tell he was genuinely upset from how his night had played out and couldn’t help but sympathize with him.

“Well, I’m here for reasons along similar lines. You could join me? Help me choreograph this new freestyle piece I’m working on?”, you had asked. 

Ten cocked his eyebrow at you, clearly not expecting you to extend an olive branch to him in this manner given how you were still being snarky with him five minutes ago. But he accepted your offer nonetheless.

You both entered your element pretty quickly, letting the music move your body freely. You worked out a simple choreography, cheering for each other when you came up with a particularly impressive move. You were having fun, even though you wouldn’t admit it to yourself. At least you hadn’t thought of your ex in the last couple of hours, mind completely occupied with the thought that you and Ten surprisingly made good dance partners. Perhaps the friction between the two of you translated to great chemistry when you were dancing. Taeyong would be pleased to know that.

“I’m beat”, you exclaimed, slumping down on the floor after the final round of practice. Ten sat down next to you, resting his back against the mirrored wall. The pair of you sat wordlessly for a few minutes, letting your heartbeats slow back down. You lay flat on the floor, too physically exhausted to move. As soon as you closed your eyes, your traitorous mind brought back the images of your ex’s engagement and you groaned loudly.

“Long day?”, Ten asked, giving you a slightly concerned look. You just chuckled bitterly in response.

“Want to talk about it?”, Ten pried in an almost uncharacteristically gentle voice. You wondered if he had ever spoken to you in that tone before. 

“I don’t know if we’re close enough to have little heart-to-hearts yet Ten”, you replied. There was an invisible wall between you and Ten that you were just not ready to tear down. The thought of sharing embarrassing details about your love life with someone you could consider a frenemy at best, too jarring. You didn’t miss the way Ten’s shoulders slightly slumped at that. You hadn’t meant to sound harsh, yet you felt somewhat guilty.

“But…maybe we are close enough to have a drink together?”, you asked, suddenly emboldened by a rush of confidence that confused even you. You took his cheeky smile as a yes.

You spent the rest of the night drunk and giggling with Ten. The thoughts of your ex were long forgotten. Perhaps you could learn to do more than merely tolerating Ten’s presence. Perhaps you could learn to enjoy his presence too.

Soon it became a ritual - if you and Ten were the last ones left in the studio, you would grab some beers and head to the roof. It was such strange departure from your usual selves that you often wondered why it was so easy for you to enjoy his company sitting under the stars like this when you would be at each other’s throats the rest of the time. 

Over time your conversations had gone from discussions about art, to plans of travelling the world, what you were currently binge-watching on Netflix, and everything in between. Still, there were some topics that you both steered clear of - talk of family and love lives was seemingly off the table.

Until one night after a couple of drinks, when Ten pulled his phone out to show you a picture of two women, one older and one younger. The striking resemblance between the faces in the photo and Ten confirmed that they were indeed his mother and sister. His sister was clad in a dark blue graduation gown and his mother was holding a beautiful bouquet of light pink roses. 

“She graduated last week, my baby sister”, Ten said practically glowing. The proud look on his face was a testament to the close relationship he had with his sibling. 

“You must miss her a lot”, you said, voice barely a whisper.

“All the time. My family are my biggest supporters. I don’t think I would have had the courage to move out here on my own if it weren't for their encouragement”, Ten answered. 

You hadn’t spoken to your family ever since you came to Seoul. In the past, the longing left a pressure in your chest that sometimes made it feel like your throat would close, choking you on your guilt. Now, it just left you numb. 

“What about you?”, Ten asked, cautiously prying into your personal life.

“What about me?”, you countered, diverting your gaze away from the man sitting next to you, instantly wary of how much you wanted to share about your past. 

“What about your family? Your old home?”, Ten asked. 

It couldn’t hurt sharing with Ten, right? It’s not like what he thought of you really mattered to you. Right?

“I actually don’t keep in touch with my family any more. They weren’t too keen on me becoming a dancer. It’s been, what, three? Three and a half years since I last saw them. When I first left home for Seoul”, you said, trying your hardest to suppress any trace of emotion in your voice. You kept your gaze focused on the city skyline ahead of you, too afraid to turn and see the expression on Ten’s face. You wondered what he thought of you, whether he thought you were stubborn. Worse yet, whether he pitied you.

After a few moments, Ten broke the silence. “I guess sometimes, not having a family is better than having one that doesn’t love you for who you are. Don’t get me wrong, I can’t possibly know how you must have felt, all these years. But I want you to know that the people who love you now, love you without any agenda. Not because they are related to you by blood, not because they are obligated to love you. But because they just love you”, Ten said, eyes shining with an emotion you didn’t know how to react to. 

“And they could be your family too”, he finished in a voice that was so warm, so gentle, you wondered if this really was the Ten who stole your jelly doughnuts when you first met.

You were speechless, processing his words for what felt like hours but was probably just a few seconds. Then you did the only thing your impulsive mind could think to do - you leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. In response, he wrapped you up in his embrace. You stayed still, focusing on the faint scent of his cologne on the sleeves of his hoodie. You breathed out a thank you, soft as a whisper. Whether or not Ten heard you, he moved his left arm slightly, gently stroking your hair and continued to chatter on about some entirely different topic. 

You knew that once the sun came back up and both of you returned to your lives inside the studio, this little moment would not be brought up in front of anyone else. That moment was just for the two of you to share and bury deep within your hearts.

You knew you were in too deep one day when Ten gave you a friendly smile in passing while making his way to the break room, and you felt your cheeks and neck heat up. You had finally let the Thai dancer charm his way into your heart. 

Typical Y/N, you thought to yourself, Falling in love with any cute boy who gives you attention. But he wasn’t just any cute boy. It was Ten. Ten, your frenemy turned close confidant. Ten, who would send you pictures of cute animals he saw on the street just because you once told him you wanted to adopt a cat. Ten, who took you dancing to a club in Hongdae when you were feeling low and all but carried your drunk ass back to your home. Ten, who over the last couple of months had heard every single one of your deepest insecurities and had still chosen to stick by you. Ten who had just left a box of jelly doughnuts in the break room, next to a post-it note with your name on it. To make matters worse, you were supposed to start working on a new collaboration together this week, a contemporary piece set to an R&B slow jam. How were you meant to work with him all week when you could barely make eye contact with him? You had to physically restrain yourself from facepalming.

You spent the week, evading conversation with him beyond work and some small talk to fill the silence. But none of your usual banter. You had even turned down his suggestion to grab dinner together several times that week, to the point that even typically non-confrontational Sicheng had picked up that something was off.

“Why have you been avoiding Ten all week? I thought you guys had given up fighting?”, Sicheng asked after he cornered you one day.

“Avoiding him? Now, why would I do that when we’ve been working together all week?”, you had chuckled nervously, desperately looking for an out from this conversation.

“He’s been sulking around since Tuesday, Y/N. He said he doesn’t know what he did to upset you”, Sicheng had asked you sharply. 

The guilt in your eyes must have been apparent because Sicheng dropped his voice into a gentle whisper for what he said next. 

“I know the two of you are as good at dancing around your feelings as you are at dancing on stage. But maybe try talking to him, Y/N? I think right now, you two might have more in common than you think”, Sicheng told you as he gave you a knowing look. 

The day of the performance shoot came and there was a noticeable awkwardness between you and Ten. You decided to cut the tension by apologizing to him, citing the nerves for the performance as the reason you had been on edge the whole week. Whether or not Ten believed you, he accepted your apology and wrapped you up in his arms. You wished you had psychic abilities so you could read his mind. Did he have the same butterflies in his stomach right now?

As soon as the music started any nervousness you felt around Ten melted away. Dancing with him was like second nature to you by now. The song started with you on stage alone, dancing under the single spotlight illuminating the stage. You could see him out of the corner of your eyes, following your every move and observing you with nothing short of adoration. You left the stage for Ten’s solo and you could feel the goosebumps on your skin from watching him perform. He was absolutely stunning, moving fluidly through the movements as though he was painting with his body on the canvas of the stage. You joined him on stage for the chorus, dancing apart but facing one another as though mirroring the other’s movements. Through the bridge you inched closer and closer to one another. You felt your heartbeat beginning to rise from the proximity. 

Both of you could communicate with each other with your eyes alone. You danced perfectly in sync with one another, pulling apart only to fall right back into each other, just like magnets. So different yet inseparable. You could see it in his eyes, when he looked at you, that the emotion in his mirrored yours. You knew you weren’t imagining it when he audibly gasped as you melted into his embrace for the final move. His heartbeat was racing a hundred miles an hour, just like yours. The pair of you stood there, lips just a few millimeters apart, breathing deeply as the studio erupted into thunderous applause. You were no longer afraid to admit to yourself and to the world, that you had it bad for Ten Lee. 

And when he kissed you on the rooftop that night, you knew that he had it bad for you too. 

[porkchop-ao3]

A Thrill I’ve Never Known (Chapter 38)

Out In The Wilderness

Arthur and reader head out for some time away from camp after the trolley station job goes badly. Deep conversations and smut ensue. Enjoy!

(All chapters tagged with #ATINK and also posted on Ao3, username PorkChop)

-

Arthur returned to camp in a foul mood. So did Dutch, and to a lesser degree, Lenny. They all looked dishevelled and bashed up; Dutch had a pair of black eyes, their clothes were filthy and ripped, Arthur's hands and face were dotted with cuts and bruises. It was clear before anyone said anything that the trolley station job had not gone to plan. I'd been discussing the art dealer job with John when they all returned home, and I watched as Arthur went straight upstairs to his room; presumably to get changed.

John said my name, and I turned back to him. He was staring at me expectantly. 

"I'm sorry?"

"What day? You were telling me when this job was going down," he reminded me. 

"Oh, yeah. Saturday, so tomorrow. Evening time; I've spoken to Arthur about it, he said he'd talk to Lenny. The wagon will be coming from Saint Denis to Valentine, so I'd suggest mapping that route, picking a spot on the outskirts of Valentine, going for it then."

"You're not joining us?" He asked. 

"We all saw how well I handled waving a gun around yesterday."

"Oh right, yeah. How're you holding up, by the way?"

"I'm okay. Ain't the first time a gang of psychos has knocked me down and brought me close to death," my laugh was empty, and John gave me a careful smile. 

"I heard you handled it well, in the end."

"I shot a guy, yeah, no need to congratulate me. People keep praising me for it, it's real odd," I frowned to myself. 

"It's okay not to be proud of it, but you did the right thing; was all you could do. That's all people are praising you for," he shrugged, then clapped a hand on my shoulder, giving it a convivial shake. 

"I guess," I smiled. 

"Hey, Arthur mentioned that job to me," Lenny said to me as he passed me by on the way to Pearson's pot, "sounds like a good one. Well, I hope it is, today didn't go so well."

"I thought as much, what happened?" I frowned, and John spun around in his seat to listen to him. 

"Barely made enough to buy groceries, and Dutch took a real knock to the head. It weren't good. But we made it, so that counts for something," Lenny flashed an optimistic smile once he'd finished, then carried on walking. 

John and I shared a look, and eventually I rose to my feet. 

"I'm gonna go see Arthur," I told him.

"Sure, you tell him I'm in on that job tomorrow," John nodded, and I patted his back appreciatively before heading off. 

I knocked on Arthur's door, calling his name, and he invited me in. He was just buttoning up a fresh shirt when I entered, his back to me. I walked inside, picked up his clothes for something to do, bundling them up and putting them on the table neatly for me to wash for him later. I met his gaze, noting the tension in his jaw and brow. 

"I heard it didn't go well, I'm sorry," I started, and Arthur shook his head, releasing a breath. 

"Will you ride with me?" He requested, surprising me.

"Of course," I nodded, then followed him out of the room as he pulled his suspenders up and over his shoulders.

"Could do with just some space between me and everyone else, this place," he said under his breath as we walked through the house, downstairs and over to the horses. "I'm sure you could, too."

"You're not wrong," I agreed, and we mounted up on our horses and headed out of camp. 

We rode in silence for some time, heading away from the swampy area, out towards the firmer grounds of Scarlett Meadows, where the air was just a little dryer. That was immediately more pleasant on its own, the swamps could be so suffocating. 

I decided to breach the silence. "You wanna talk about what went wrong today?"

"It all went wrong, right from the start. We shouldn't even have bothered with it in the first place; it was a bad idea. Should've known that when Bronte told us about it."

"Wait, Bronte? The feller who had Jack?"

"Yeah, yeah, you don't have to tell me how dumb it was to trust him with a tip-off after that nonsense," Arthur grumbled and I shook my head. 

"I wasn't gonna say that."

"Well, it was dumb. I can't believe Dutch went ahead with it. But it's done now. We're just lucky we got out of there alive," he scoffed, shaking his head bitterly.

I pursed my lips and looked ahead, running my fingers through Rayna's mane briefly. 

"We stuck the place up and there was barely any cash, then the number of lawmen turning up– it had to be a set up. We had to shoot our way out of the city, almost killing ourselves in a trolley crash in the process. It was all complete shambles," Arthur continued.

"Trolley crash?"

"I'm sticking to horses as my getaway from now on," Arthur grunted and shook his head. "At least we got your job tomorrow."

"John said he's in on that, by the way," I let him know, and he nodded. 

"Seems straightforward enough, hopefully it'll make us some good money."

"Don't jinx it," I snorted. 

"Any more bad luck, at this point I'm jus' used to it," he sighed. 

"Cheer up, Arthur. As long as we're alive and free, things are okay," I reassured him, smiling at him. He let out a wistful sigh and glanced over at me. 

"That's real nice. It's a pity I ain't got much room for optimism right now," he said apologetically and I shook my head in amusement. 

"It's alright, Arthur, you ain't gotta be sunshine and rainbows. Just don't dwell on it, okay? It's over, you and the others got out mostly unscathed and you're free to rob some other poor bastards. You don't have to think about it no more, think of somethin' else," I said cheerily and he chuckled. 

"You seem chipper," he commented. 

"Well, I'm just trying to keep us afloat. Things aren't bad enough to be all in despair just yet, and I don't like seeing my man with the weight of the world on his shoulders. That's Dutch's to carry, our mighty leader," I teased, catching the shake of his head and his badly hidden smirk. 

"Your man, huh?"

I looked at him for a while, pressing my lips together. "How 'bout we set up camp out here?"

"Now?" He quirked a brow.

"Sure. I could kill us a rabbit for dinner, we could camp out here. You got your tent, right?"

"Sure I do."

"Alright then, what do you say?"

"You ain't worried 'bout Dutch getting mad with us again?" He questioned, though he let me veer us off the path towards what looked like an ideal campground. A patch of trees with a decently sized clearing in the middle, far enough away from passing travellers.

"He already hates me, so I don't care. Are you worried?" 

Arthur made a noise and the two of us dismounted, hitching the horses up against a tree. 

"He don't hate you," he tried to assure me, and I smiled in amusement.

"Well he sure as shit don't like me," I laughed, "don't worry, I don't mind. It's you I'm sticking around for. Along with folk like Charles and John, Mary-Beth, Abigail… decent folk."

"So you don't think Dutch is decent?" Arthur queried, retrieving the canvas for his tent off the back of Jet. 

"I never said that."

"You didn't, but it sounded like you meant it."

I shrugged my shoulders, wandering around the immediate area to look for firewood as Arthur pitched the tent. We worked in silence for a while, I'd gathered up an armful of sticks for the fire by the time the tent was standing and Arthur was laying down blankets inside. The sun was starting to go down, and I hurried off with my bow to catch us some dinner before it got dark.

When I got back with a rabbit slung over my shoulder, Arthur had a fire going. I sat myself down next to him where he was poking at it, staring into the flames. His face was aglow with yellow light, dimming and brightening with the shivering of the flames; he looked deep in thought. I was in the process of skinning dinner when he spoke again. 

"You think I'd be upset with you if you admitted you had zero trust in Dutch?" He asked. His tone was curious, not in the least bit irritable; it put me at ease, but not enough to want to open up on the topic. 

"You mean the man you've been following since you was just a boy?" I began, then snorted, "I wouldn't blame you if you were, but I don't think you would be."

"Right, so why're you dodging that question just now?" He followed up.

"Because I believe it's far above my station to sit here and spout off what I think about a man I've known for five minutes, to you, who's known him decades," I explained, "sure, I won't keep my lips fully sealed, I'm quite honest about the fact that he's not my favourite man in the world, and that I don't think he reckons all that much to me. But I don't feel right going any further than that."

"There's more to it, I know there is, and I want you to be able to tell me these things. You're my lady, I don't put you at any station lower than myself, you understand that, don't you?" 

"Well, I'm happy to hear that," I told him quietly, putting the rabbit skin aside and beginning to cut the meat from the animal.

"Come on, sweetheart," he pleaded.

"I'm wrist deep in a rabbit, Arthur," I chuckled, "what do you want me to say?"

"Tell me why you don't like Dutch. And I ain't asking so I could try to change your mind, I wanna know because I'm–" he stopped abruptly, paused to think, "Dutch ain't been acting the way I'm used to, lately. I just wanna hear from someone who has a fresh perspective."

I sat back on my heels and looked at him. He held eye contact for some time, then broke it to spear a piece of meat on the end of his knife and hold it over the flames. 

"Okay," I said meekly, "well, I get the impression he likes having people around him that'll do whatever he says without question. And sure, that's understandable to some extent, him being the so-called brains behind this whole gang, but…"

"Keep going."

"I don't think it's all that healthy, is all. He obviously cares about you, but the way he acts with me, it's like he's worried your loyalty's being split. I don't know how best to say it," I explained, shrugging a bit. "Just look at how he was when we went to Saint Denis. You took one night away, while the whole camp was gettin' drunk anyway, and he made out like it was a terrible thing you did. 

"And yesterday, acting like you were keeping secrets from him just 'cause you didn't go runnin' to him the first time we shared a kiss… like he deserves to know everything even when it don't concern him. Like you ain't just allowed to be your own person. Perhaps I'm being melodramatic," I shook my head, looking to Arthur to see him focusing completely on the meat he was cooking, his brow lowered only enough to be noticeable. 

"So I guess that's part of it. The way he seems to have you on such a short leash despite all you do, all your loyalty," I concluded. 

"I have to set an example, I suppose is his thinkin'," he explained and I gave him a look.

"Thought you said you weren't gonna try changing my mind."

"No, I'm– yeah, you're right. Sorry."

"Anyway, you said yourself he ain't treating me like everyone else, that he trusted Micah sooner than this. I've said this before, 'bout how I feel I could be accused of trying to steal you away. Maybe there's some truth in that, 'least for what Dutch thinks of me," I hypothesised.   

"Maybe," he said softly, surprising me with his acceptance. 

"Arthur, just remember that I don't care about all this. Last thing I want is for me to change the way you and Dutch are. Just 'cause he can be unfriendly with me, don't mean I want you to take issue with the man. I ain't been here long enough to make waves so big, never mind what you and I mean to each other," I said, putting my hand on his knee and giving it a squeeze. 

"Don't worry about that. I ain't gonna act any sort'a way with him. But I gotta say, I been thinking stuff since before you, back in Blackwater. He's been doing things I don't understand, I guess he's just been a little more ruthless. I've been hoping it's a rough patch, but things ain't improving; and since being with you and hearing what you've gotta say, well," he sighed, shaking his head a little, "I've been seeing more clearly, is all."

"What do you mean?"

"It means a couple months ago I wouldn't've dreamed of quitting, leaving the gang. Now I think of it damn near every day."

 My heart thumped and I stared with wide eyes. Did he really just say that?

Arthur handed me the knife by its handle with the cooked meat on the end. I took it from him, blowing on it to cool it as I processed his words. 

The sky was painted navy blue, now, with streaks of pink only just visible on the horizon. I couldn't see the stars through the thin layer of cloud, but it was a pleasant evening regardless. Too pleasant to feel so jarred by such a conversation.

I pulled the meat off the knife once it was cool enough to touch, then speared another raw piece and handed it to Arthur to cook for himself. 

"If you're really thinking that way," I began carefully, taking a bite of meat to break up my words and allow me time to think, "then I can only say I'm sorry. I know you've been there a long time and it must be daunting to suddenly have these feelings."

"Yeah, no doubt," he snorted, watching the fat ooze from the meat, dripping into the fire and sparking bright.

"I'll stick with you, no matter what," I told him confidently, "I didn't have much at all when I joined, I was just floating along, getting by. You've made me happy, sweetheart, given me something more to wake up for than just surviving."

"You know, I could say the same thing to you. Maybe it's realising that that's made me consider getting the hell out. If I could spend each day with you, without all the crap that plagues us now," he trailed off and shook his head with a wistful sigh. 

I reached to him, stroking my fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. His shoulders loosened at my touch, dropping down as he took a slow breath. 

"Let's just enjoy this, hm? Being out here, just us, on a nice warm evening. Isn't this lovely?" I smiled at him and he chuckled. 

"You're too goddamn precious, you know that?"

I grinned and leaned over to kiss his cheek.

The two of us ate the rabbit between us and spent the evening sat around the fire in peace. It really was lovely, just enjoying some time alone with him. I felt as happy as I had in Saint Denis, even without the cushy bed; perhaps even more so. I liked being outdoors, breathing in cool, clean air, enjoying that sweet smoky smell of the fire, hearing crickets and owls working together to compose a constant song. No comfy bed could beat it, not when the city could only offer less savoury sounds and smells. 

We crawled into the tent together, letting the fire smoulder on outside, keeping us warm while the temperature dropped once the sun was hidden beyond the horizon. Arthur was curled around me from behind, his body knitted against mine in a perfect copy of my silhouette, his hand around my front where I held it in mine. We slept like that.

Not through the night, however.

I awoke at some ungodly hour – the sun not yet close to rising – needing to pee. The last thing I wanted was to remove myself from Arthur's arms, but I knew I'd never be able to fall back to sleep without taking care of business. So, I very gently lifted his arm and scooted out from under it, and out of the tent. I crept away from our campsite and did what I had to do. 

I fed our dwindling fire with a couple more sticks before heading back into the warm privacy of the tent, settling down on my side next to Arthur. I was tempted to pull his arm back over me, but I was too scared of waking him. It didn't matter, though, since he shifted and wrapped it around me himself.

My heart warmed at the sleepy action, and I smiled at his tired, breathy groan as he moved around to get comfy huddled up behind me again. I thought he was asleep until I felt his lips at the back of my neck, pressing soft, sweet kisses there above the bandage wrapped around it.

"You okay?" He murmured. 

"Call of nature," I whispered and he hummed in understanding, kissing me again as his arm tightened around my waist. "I'm sorry for waking you."

"Don't be," he breathed, letting his hand creep up my body, dragging along, unabashedly exploring. I let out a surprised laugh. 

"Arthur?" I questioned, feeling him hum and talk against my neck as he continued to trail his mouth around to the space below my ear. 

"What is it?" 

"What're you–" my voice left me as his hand reached my breast, fondling me through my clothes as his hips curled forwards, pressing himself against my backside. "Arthur," I repeated, this time in a breathy moan. 

I tilted my body, pressing my backside firm against him, giving my permission for things to go further. His hips rolled, a shaky groan vibrating below my ear. He was hard. Not even just getting there, already totally hard. I gasped, my body stiffening involuntarily, in turn making Arthur freeze. 

He made a dazed sound, let my breast go, backed off a little.

"Shit, I'm sorry, I weren't–" he huffed a sheepish laugh, "I weren't quite with it, there."

"What? Oh, don't stop," I pleaded with him. There was a pause.

"Really?" 

I hummed my agreement, nodding. 

"I wake up like this sometimes," he whispered, pressing his hips back to my behind, rubbing subtly, "usually it don't matter. But waking up like this, with you lying there…"

Arthur took a deep breath, his nose buried in the crook of my shoulder.

"Well, Dutch ain't likely to interrupt us here," I whispered, and Arthur laughed harder than I expected him to. 

"I would not put much past him," he joked, then kissed the side of my neck, steering clear of my bandaged wound, allowing his hand to move downwards, exploring my thighs. 

His kisses turned to sucking, his lips closing over a spot on my neck that made me gasp. Over time he'd desensitised me to my once unbearable ticklishness, now it was only pleasure I felt.

As he sucked on my skin, making me tingle, he tugged open the button on my jeans and pushed his hand inside. I cursed under my breath. This is really happening out here, I thought. He stroked me fast, perfect pressure over my clit, tight circles, having me panting in no time. 

Arthur sucked on my neck until it was on the verge of feeling tender, then he released me, pressing a kiss to the spot before resting his chin on my shoulder and peering down my body. He watched as he pleasured me, made me moan softly, forced my hips to roll on their own, encouraging the motion of his hand and simultaneously grinding against his arousal. Arthur groaned into my ear, shifted. I was trapped between his hand and his hips, pushed back and forth between the two. His heavy breaths, sighs of my name, it took away all tension in me. I wrapped my hand around Arthur's arm and clung to it as two fingers entered me, the heel of a hand grinding down. 

"Mm, I need you," he sighed to me, tilting his head and letting his nose and lips make trails of goosebumps on my neck and shoulder. His breath tickled me and I came close to losing it, my core pulsing and feeling hot and sensitive.

He fucked me with his fingers, his pace moderate, yet careful. He was always careful with me. 

My ass was exposed as Arthur used his free hand to pull my pants down along with my underwear, the air hit my skin and though it wasn't cold, I shivered. There was shuffling behind me, the sound of shifting fabric and metal belt buckles; then Arthur was hot against me, his freed erection rubbing up against my backside, a guttural moan vibrating through his chest to my back.

I came on his fingers, gripping his arm tighter, thrusting against him as the pleasure took over and drove my body to move. I moaned Arthur's name, uttering my pleads for him to have me, to take me there and then. 

"I got you, baby," he whispered, slowing his strokes, removing his fingers, giving my sensitive clit a couple of swipes that made me whimper and twitch. Arthur took his cock in his hand, guided one of my legs forward to give him access.

"Please," I sighed, unable to keep the needy desperation out of my voice. I didn't sound like myself to me, I sounded utterly debauched. Perhaps I'd be ashamed of myself if I wasn't so helplessly aroused. 

He guided himself inside me; each time we did this was easier than the last. I no longer felt any pain. Once we were fully connected, Arthur made a shaky, broken sound as he took a moment to wrap his arm around my front and hold me to him. He remained still for a moment. His face was pressed against my shoulder and I could feel his stuttered breaths rolling over me, hot and humid. 

"You're too good to me, lettin' me do this out here," he rumbled, barely audibly. His hips gave a minute pull and push, enough to have him sucking air through his teeth. 

"You say that like you're the only one who likes this," I laughed though it was more like a series of heavy breaths.

"Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure I'm the one with the better deal. You're goddamn perfect," he whispered, thrusting, picking up the pace. His movements were measured and deep, lingering on the inward thrust, staying buried in me for a second, so deep I felt an ache bloom in my gut. 

"Wouldn't be so sure, you ain't felt what I'm feeling," I said, squeezing my muscles around him and delighting in the shot of pleasure it provided. Seemingly for Arthur too, who released a sudden, loud moan. 

"Ahh, fuck," he gasped, then began fucking me in earnest, quick and hard enough to bounce me back and forth on his length and rob me of my breath. 

I brought one hand to Arthur's, gripping it tight, my other hand going between my legs. I curiously teased my fingers along my folds, reaching down to where we were joined, straddling two fingers either side of his cock. He hummed at the contact, kissing me then clamping down to suck on another part of my neck, right where it joined my shoulder. I whined and tilted my head, encouraging him. 

Arthur was particularly confident that night, it seemed; eagerly pawing at my breasts after slipping a hand underneath my shirt. He played with my nipples, tugging and thumbing them until they were hard and sensitive. He was less hesitant than he had been before. I wondered why, but it struck me with the way he was grunting in my ear and fucking into me quick and needy, that he seemed to have a lot of pent up tension. I understood, it'd been a terrible couple of days. 

"Baby, can we– up on your knees, for me?" He requested after a moment, his movements faltering, his hand planting itself in front of me to hold himself up as he began to reposition himself. 

I was breathless as I kicked my legs free of clothing and rolled onto my front within the confines of his arms; breaking our connection only temporarily. I pushed myself up on my hands and knees and Arthur was immediately settling in behind me, grabbing my hips. He re-entered with a hiss of a curse word. The change allowed him more freedom, and he pulled me back to meet his thrusts as he picked up where he left off. His cock so firmly stimulated an incredible spot inside me and I cried out in pleasure, collapsing forward to rest my head on my folded arms as I took everything he gave. 

"Is this nice, princess?" He asked me, breath laboured.

"Yes!" I sighed, hearing his moan of a chuckle in response. He took a hand and stroked it up my spine, lifting my shirt and camisole with it. 

Arthur slowed enough to appreciate the position, only for a moment, to cast his hands down the curve of my waist, over my hips, to my backside (which he squeezed rather zealously), and back up again. All the while a low moan built in his throat. 

"Fuck, you are beautiful," his words were uttered quiet and gravelly, his voice coarse and earnest enough for me to really believe it just for that moment. It was odd, feeling such a way. 

I squeezed my muscles around him again, earning a grunt and a chuckle and a breathy that's nice. Then his breather was over and he fucked me hard, his hips smacking against my backside, his hands gripping me almost enough to bruise but not quite; he'd never lose himself enough to unintentionally mar my body with his passion. Though, I suspected my neck would bear a few signs of it with the way he'd been ravishing it, entirely intentionally.

I reached between my legs again, this position allowing me to touch him more easily. My fingers found the edge of his cock again, I enjoyed feeling him pumping in and out of me. His balls met my hand with every thrust, and I reached to cup them, hearing the way Arthur hummed and sucked in a shuddering breath. 

"What's that hand doin' down there?" He queried playfully, leaning forwards and holding himself up with a hand next to me. His chest pressed against my back, the cold metal of the fixings of his suspenders reminded me he was still fully dressed, taking me through the opening of his pants. The thought thrilled me, oddly. 

"Do you like it?" I giggled. Arthur pushed my shirt further up with his nose, then kissed me between my shoulders. 

"Mmhm," he hummed his affirmation, rolling his hips in an upward motion, breathing heavy across my back as he pressed his forehead to me. "'m close," he told me. 

He pushed himself upwards, taking his cock in hand as he withdrew. He rubbed the head of it along my folds, circling my clit until I was groaning. He was drawing out our pleasure, making it last. 

The few moments of emptiness made it all the more exhilarating when he returned to my warmth. His hands spread my ass cheeks, his thumbs venturing down to part the lips of my nether regions around his length; spreading me open. He let loose an indulgent sound, and I turned my head to look over my shoulder at him. 

"That's real pretty," he whispered, making me flush, "God, I'd love to–" he stopped, biting down on his lip and appearing to make a conscious decision to leave the sentence unfinished. 

I gave his balls a gentle fondle, and he dropped his head back to gaze at the top of the tent with a moan. 

"What's that?" I asked him sweetly.

"I'm being filthy, don't mind me," he chuckled, looking back down at me and smirking.

"Be filthy out loud, will you?" 

Arthur laughed at my bluntness, but it dissolved into a groan when I pulsed my muscles around him; a trick I'd learned very quickly that he liked. 

"You're gonna kill me, woman," he growled, his cheeks flushing peach. "I hope you realise I'm stalling, I don't wanna finish just yet. This is too damn good."

"Tell me what you were gonna say," I pleaded and with a soft sigh, Arthur squeezed my backside, letting his thumb dip between the cheeks. I jerked at the sensation.

"I'd love to finish inside you," he told me, and I swore I felt his cock twitch at the utterance. "See the mess it'd make. Told you it was filthy." 

"I'd love that too," I admitted, and he quickly shook his head. 

"I trust you don't need me to tell you why I won't."

"Of course. It's nice to imagine, though," I licked my lips and brought my hand to my clit, slowly playing with myself. I was incredibly sensitive and I released a breath, letting my eyes close. 

"Oh, it certainly is," he murmured, and began to move again. "I wanna make you cum, angel, wanna see how it feels when I'm inside you." 

"I'm almost there," I told him, rubbing myself quicker. He took me at a faster pace, grunting with exertion as he buried himself over and over, making my insides flutter and my mind grow absent; orgasm building fast. 

"That's it, darlin', I love hearing those moans," he commented, and at that point I was barely aware of the fact I was moaning. But I was. Very loudly. Any late wanderers passing by would no doubt be getting an earful. 

"Oh fuck– Arthur," I cried out, everything in me clenching up, teetering on release. 

"Where'd you wan' it, baby; when I cum?" He asked, his voice under strain and hoarse. 

"Anywhere you want," I gasped. 

Arthur's hand cupped my ass cheek, squeezing and spreading, his thumb wandering down the cleft. The presence of the digit there once again made me jerk and clench, the pleasant sensation sent me. My pleasure hit it's crescendo, my body shuddering and pulsing around Arthur's length, intensity dimming everything around me but him and the way he made me feel.

"Shit, that's nice," Arthur hissed through clenched teeth, "good girl." 

Why he felt the need to praise me, I wasn't sure, but I knew for damn sure I enjoyed it.

In that wonderful period of worriless bliss after my orgasm, Arthur pulled out of me, pushing his cock against the cleft of my ass and grinding until I could feel him spilling over my backside. His breaths came heavy and sounded like growls and he rode out his orgasm thrusting against me. 

It was intense and quick, and it ended abruptly when he pulled away, catching himself from falling backwards out of the tent with a hand behind him. A moment later I felt the blanket on my backside, wiping away his seed. I shifted and made a strange sound; it was extremely odd feeling him wipe me there.

"Sorry, I got a little slapdash with my aim, there. It was about to drip down and I–" his eyes were apologetic as he looked at me, willing me to understand what he was saying without having to spell it out (for once). 

"Oh, it's okay," I told him. 

"I didn't want it to– could'a–"

"I got it," I grinned at him and he let out a relieved chuckle. 

"I'm sorry," he whispered, leaning over me, kissing my temple. 

"Why're you apologising? That was incredible," I breathed, shifting to lie on my back below him, my shirt and camisole still bunched up, exposing my breasts. His eyes drifted down my body, between my legs briefly. His eyes – usually so soft and easy when looking at me – held an exhilarating air of hunger and pride.

After a moment, he spoke. "Yeah, it was, weren't it?" His little smirk and his cheeky tone sent me into a giggle. "You're an incredible woman," he added, leaning down and nuzzling his face against my neck, gently pressing a kiss to my bandage. 

His body settled over mine, his cock nestling between my legs, coaxing gasps from the both of us.

"I never know what to say when you say things like that," I whispered. 

"You ain't gotta say nothing, just believe it," he answered, kissing my neck, then my jaw, then my cheeks. 

"You could take your own advice, there; the most handsome cowboy I ever did lay eyes on," I grinned up at him and cupped his face in my hands, trailing my thumbs over his cheekbones, "though he don't know it."

"You ain't seen my last bounty poster," he scoffed out a laugh and I rolled my eyes playfully. "I look like one ugly son of a bitch."

"Well, they couldn't put a real flattering picture up, otherwise who'd wanna bring you in? They'd be hunting you down to marry you instead."

"Alright, Miss Jemima Jones, what con you pullin'?"

"Never mind," I sighed, shaking my head at him, "I guess if you really knew how nice you were to look at, you'd get nothing done. Jus' be staring in the mirror all day like Miss O'Shea."

Arthur laughed, but pushed his face into my shoulder as if to hide it. 

"That's why she don't do much. Her beauty's a blessing and a curse," I added.

"Dutch let's her off jus' to keep her quiet. Molly, she… she don't have it as easy as it looks," Arthur told me, lifting his head to look at me. 

"No, I don't imagine she does. Can't be easy being in love with someone like Dutch," I acknowledged.

"No. I've known Dutch years, and I have to say… he don't always treat his lady friends all that good."

"In what way?" I frowned. 

"Easily replaced," he simply murmured. "So, I'd say falling for him; that's her worst curse. He's been brushing her off a lot, lately."

"You think he's getting…" I trailed off, not wanting to say bored, but meaning it. Arthur understood and nodded. 

"Seen it plenty of times, unfortunately."

Well, I thought, Molly could do a lot better than him anyway. But I didn't say it.

After a moment I said; "where are my pants? It's odd talking about Dutch when I'm naked from the waist down," and Arthur laughed, sitting up, back on his heels. 

He handed me my pants and I redressed – an easy process with my drawers still lining the inside of my jeans – as he fixed his own clothes. He moved to sit down beside me, and we were both a little out of breath after moving around in the confined space. We laid side by side, staring up at the top of the tent and watching the shifting light dance across the canvas. A reminder that the thing was fabric, not brick, and we'd essentially just slept together out in the open in the middle of nowhere. Goodness me.

"What we just did," I began, rolling my head to the side to look at him; he did the same, "was real naughty." I smirked.

"What did you expect when you hooked up with a lowlife criminal?" He quipped and I snorted, shaking my head. 

"Well, I don't know. Never envisioned myself doing that."

"You disappointed?"

"Absolutely not."

"Well, I wouldn't worry too much about our bad behaviour, then," he grinned at me. 

"Is that your life moral? Bad behaviour is okay as long as the result is satisfactory?" I questioned, all in good fun, of course.

"Well, not consciously, no. But it does look that way, don't it?" He said, almost a little sheepishly. We shared a laugh and I shook my head at him affectionately.

"You're a funny man," I breathed, rolling over to snuggle up against his side, laying my head on his chest. I listened to his heartbeat, a little elevated. 

I wanted to tell him I loved him, but I could not find the courage. Instead I thought it, over and over, hoping he knew it.

[a-writers-writing]

You Won’t Earn Anything Standin’ There and Lookin’ Pretty | Chapter 2

It’s here! Chapter two is here! Incase you missed the post, this will update every other day, the final chapter being posted on Valentine’s Day! Anyways, enjoy chapter two!!

Chapter 1

Warnings: cursing

Tag list: @helplesshansen @we-dont-sell-papes @mike-faist-is-the-best @ben-cook-can-cook @daveys–jacobs @newsieofnj @gaymur @racetrackscigar @stuckinmyneverendingheadspace (let me know if you want to be removed/be added to this!)

With a sigh Pigeon nodded and headed to where he knew he could find Race, leaving Blue with the rest of the guys. He went up to the third floor balcony, worry buried deep in his chest. He could barely step onto the balcony before he trapped was in a tight hug.

“Jack told me what happened at the cafe with Davey. Blue didn’t bust his head, did she? I know how protective she gets-” Race rambled, but was cut off by Pigeon shaking slightly. “Pidge? Pigeon are you cryin’?” He held him at an arm’s length and frowned, tucking his cigar into his pocket. “Hey, you’re okay. You’re in New York. They can’t get you here, and even if they could, you got newsies not only here in Manhattan, but I’m sure Brooklyn would have your back in a heartbeat.” He pulled him back into a tight hug. “You’re safe here, Pigeon.”

Pigeon hated crying in front of the other guys, it made him feel weak, but Racetrack was different. He was the only other person, other than Blue, that he would cry to. So he sobbed into Race’s chest until the pain in his head was throbbing. Race held him tight in the warm summer air, like he was protecting him. Pigeon always found that Race was protective of him and, even though it got annoying, he wasn’t mad about it. If someone tipped off Pigeon in any way, Blue or Race were always by his side. It was nice to have people that cared about him.

They went back inside after a few more minutes, after Pigeon had calmed down completely. Race took him to his room and sat on the bed with him, picking up the old teddy bear that sat on the pillow and handing it to Pigeon. They sat in silence for a bit, Pigeon leaning his head on Race’s shoulder, until Pigeon started to giggle. Race smiled and looked at him, an eyebrow raised. “What’re ya laughin’ at?”

“Nothing, don’t worry ‘bout it. Blue would have my head if I told you,” Pigeon said, a devious smile on his face.

Race shook his head slightly in disbelief. “For some reason,” he started, “I don’t believe you’re gonna keep it a secret from me.”

“You’re right. Blue has a crush on Davey, but she refuses to admit it. You should’ve seen the way she looked at him when Jack was talkin’ to him and she even defended ‘im when I teased him.”

Race gasped slightly. “Not the same Blue who teases every boy here? Man has she gots it bad…”

“Hey but don’t go ‘round tellin’ people I told you. I trust you, Racetrack Higgins, don’t blow this.”

He nodded and crossed his heart. “Youse got my word, Pigeon.”

Pigeon nodded and put down his teddy bear, then hugged Race. “Thank you, Race. Let’s go down to the other guys before they start crackin’ jokes.” He stood and started walking, but Race grabbed his hand and stopped him. Pigeon flinched under his grasp and Race quickly pulled his hand away, then stood.

“‘M sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.” He walked next to Pigeon and held both of his hands, swinging them slightly. Pigeon took note of the blush that was heavy on his cheeks and smiled, locking eyes with him. “I just... I want to make sure you’re really okay before we go out there. I care ‘bout you.”

“I never took you as the sentimental type, Racetrack!” A voice sounded from the door, very much so ruining the moment. Romeo stood at the door with Jojo and Albert on either side of him.

“‘Ey maybe we should call Blue up ‘ere so she can see what’s goin’ on with her best friend,” Albert joked. Pigeon took off his hat and threw it at him, but missed by a mile. The trio laughed and walked into the room, the moment being unsalvageable.

Pigeon sighed, but smiled at Race. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Racetrack. And remember, tell no one.” He walked out of the room, grabbing his hat on the way out, and made his way to where he left Blue.

Blue was sitting next to Specs and reading with a mug next to her. Pigeon sat on her other side and picked up her mug, taking a sip then making a face. “What is this?”

Specs and her locked eyes and both laughed. “I told you he’d do it! You doubted me!” She laughed, putting her book down.

“What was that, Blue?!” He demanded, wiping his tongue on his sleeve.

“Black coffee,” she said, her laughing being reduced to giggling.

“What?! You don’t even drink coffee!” He looked at her, disgusted.

“Yeah, I know. Specs didn’t believe me when I told him you would take a sip from any drink I had so I wanted to prove him wrong,” she said cheerfully.

Pigeon looked at Specs, clearly betrayed, but Specs only shrugged and smiled. “Youse two are a couple of bullies,” Pigeon whined.

Blue wrapped her arm around him gave him a side hug. “You want me to be a bully? What was you and Race talkin’ ‘bout?”

Pigeon looked away to hide his blush. “We wasn’t talkin’ ‘bout nothin’. Jack told ‘im what happened today ‘n he wanted to make sure I was, ya know, okay…”

“And then what happened? Did he kiss you yet?” Blue teased.

Pigeon looked over at Specs, who appeared to be reading to anyone who wasn’t actually watching him. He lowered his voice and leaned closer to Blue. “I’m pretty sure he was going to, but we was interrupted. Romeo, Jojo, and Albert walked in right before anything happened.”

Blue looked at him, shocked, but pride danced in her eyes. “Look at you, little man! You didn’t even run this time!”

“Stop callin’ me little man! You wouldn’t call Spot Conlon little man, woulds ya?” Pigeon complained.

“Pigeon, you ain’t half as threatenin’ as Spot Conlon. I at least know he could kick my ass if he wanted to,” Blue laughed. Pigeon rolled his eyes, but a smile crept onto his face.

The two stayed up much later than they should’ve before going to their room and finally going to bed. When the morning bell rang, Pigeon nearly had to drag himself out of bed. He shook Blue awake, half yelling at her, nearly incoherently, to wake up. He grabbed what he needed and headed to the bathroom, which was already packed. He snuck up behind Race and secretly stole the cigar from his pockets. Romeo caught sight of this and chuckled to himself, shaking his head. When Race had realized it was gone, he looked around the room quickly, earning laughs from everyone in the room. Pigeon stood at the other side of the bathroom, brushing his teeth with one hand and waving the cigar in the air with the other. Race marched over to him and quickly and took back the cigar, lingering in front of Pigeon for a few seconds more than necessary. Pigeon winked at him and the other boys started to hollar. Pigeon laughed and finished brushing his teeth before quickly fixing his hair in the mirror.

“Hey Pigeon, why do you even bother fixin’ your hair if you just wear your hat all day?” Mush asked.

He simply shrugged in response. “It just makes me feel a little better ‘bout my appearance. You should try it sometime, Mush, you could use it.” He put his hat on and laughed as Mush attempted to hit him with a towel. He walked out of the bathroom, the smile still on his face, bumping into Jack as he walked back to his room. “Mornin’ Jack!” He said with a smile and a slight tip of his hat.

“Mornin’ Pigeon. Feelin’ better than yesterday? You know Davey didn’t mean it, go easy on ‘im when you see ‘im today.”

Pigeon nodded. “Yeah, course. I’m not gonna hold it against the kid for not knowin’.”

“You got a good head on those shoulders, Pigeon. Youse is a good kid.” Jack patted his head before moving on to the bathroom.

Pigeon went back to his shared room and put on his socks and shoes, whistling to himself as he did. Blue looked at him confused.

“Why are you so cheerful this mornin’?” She asked. “You’re never this happy this early.”

Pigeon shrugged. “I dunno! I made all the guys laugh and everythin’ is just… nice.” He stretched his arms up, yawning as he did.

A knock came from the door and Race let himself in, leaning against the doorway. “I’m holdin’ you to what you said last night. Let’s go talk before we ‘ead out.”

Pigeon took at glance at Blue, who smiled at him and winked. He laughed and stood, punching her as he to walked Race. “Come get us when it’s time to go.” She nodded and went back to getting ready.

Race lead Pigeon up to the same balcony and rested against the railing, cigar in hand. “So, where was we?”

Pigeon grabbed his hands and swung them slightly, the same as the night before, and stepped closer to him. “I think we was like this. And before you ask again, yes I’m fine.” He looked down at his feet, biting at his lip. “I nearly stopped workin’ after he asked and I felt pathetic, you know? I locked up and I felt so damn weak.” He felt Race squeeze his hands slightly and looked up again.

“You ain’t weak, Pigeon. I promise you that,” Race said, his face serious. It was rare to see him this serious about something and it sent a chill down Pigeon’s spine. “I means it.”

Pigeon stood there at a loss for words, just staring into Race’s eyes. The sun started to peek out from behind the buildings, casting a blinding light across the two. Pigeon was suddenly aware of how close they were standing, their chests nearly touching. They stood in silence, both trying to build up the courage to actually do something. Until it was too late and Blue was knocking on the door and calling for them. Pigeon gave a small smile and quickly kissed Race on the cheek before hurrying off to join Blue. Race stood in shock for a few seconds before also leaving the room.

“So, are you gonna tell me what happened?” Blue asked as they walked to the gates.

Pigeon was still blushing and shook his head. “Nothing happened, Blue. Somethin’ doesn’t have to happen every time I talk to Racetrack, you knows.”

Blue rolled her eyes. “I gotta look after you cuz I know you sure as hell can’t look after yourself.”

Wiesel wrote the headline up and a handful of newsies groaned. It wasn’t great, but it would still sell. Everyone got into a line, waiting for their papers when Davey ran in.

“Sorry we’re late. Our mom needed help with something.” It was clear he had been running as he was out of breath.

Race turned to look at him. “You got folks? I was thinkin’ ‘bout gettin some myself…”

“He don’t got none ‘cus he traded them for a box of cigars,” Romeo threw in.

“‘Ey! They was Coronas!” Race turned and pointed at Romeo with a look of false warning.

Davey rolled his eyes and got in line, Les at his side. He caught sight of Pigeon and Blue chatting happily to each other and made a mental note to apologize again to Pigeon.

Pigeon, meanwhile, was putting his change into the box. “Be a dear and get me fifty papes, Weasel.” He fluttered his eyelashes and Blue laughed at him, but Wiesel didn’t seem impressed. Oscar handed him his papers and he ran a quick count, then shoved them in his bag. Blue joined him and the two sat to read through the papers, chatting about what would sell.

Among all the hustle, Pigeon saw Race go up to Jack and whisper something that made Jack smile and look around. He eyed the two suspiciously but walked with Blue to their normal selling spot.

[deereyed-blog1]

Change

Warnings: None Ships: Nbin (side kenvi, luck) Characters: Hakyeon, taekwoon, jaehwan, wonshik, hongbin, hyuk Posted in: ao3 **************************************

“You can continue anytime now” Hongbin drawled lazily sending a pointed look toward his rehearsing partner, which by the moment has a faraway look in his eyes. “huh? Yeah where was I?” Hakyeon flipped through the script pages absentmindedly, seemingly not up to do it anymore. Hongbin shifted his eyes to his watch and noticed how fast the time went by. “Ugh it’s already 11:24. Let’s stop for today” The man sighed nodding as he closed the script and put it down beside the bed silently, he was about to suggest making dinner together when his phone buzzed with an incoming message.

From Wonshikkie: 11:24 PM. Hyung, can you come over? There’s something important I want to tell you. It’s very very important! I’ll be waiting!

Hakyeon frowned noting the urgency in his friend’s words, and without missing a beat he found himself reaching for his keys and coat heading to the door. “Where are you going?” He stopped turning around once again. “I need to go somewhere” “This late at night?!” “Wonshik said it’s important” Just like that the curiosity in hongbin’s expression drastically changed into a hostile one. “What does he want now?” Hakyeon rolled his eyes at the way he spat ‘he’ like it’s the most disgusting thing in life. Maybe he shouldn’t have told him since hongbin wasn’t a big ‘fan’ of wonshik, but at the same time hakyeon never felt the need to lie to his childhood friend about anything for the past 17 years, so why should he now? “It won’t be long don’t worry” “I’m not! Go spend the night with your boyfriend” Hongbin was now holding his phone trying to act indifferent but hakyeon knew better. He bite his lips to stop from smiling as he walked back into the room throwing himself on the sulking man, hugging him sideway. “Awww don’t be jealous. You’ll still be my valentine date tomorrow” “I’m always your Valentine date you loser. AND I’M NOT JEALOUS” He fought to get away from the steel like grip halfheartedly, knowing how it’s almost impossible to do that when hakyeon is in the mood for smothering the hell out of him. “You’re sooo jealous” “I’m not!” “Yes” “No” “yes” “No” Hongbin growled, finally getting some air into his lungs making the older of them by 2 years chuckle heartily. “Be careful if people heard you they’ll totally think you have feelings for me” Hongbin huffed glaring at his screen obviously avoiding the eye contact. “You wish” I do. Hakyeon turned his back again hiding the grimace that immediately appeared on his face, and said in an overly cheerful tone. “Say you later hongbinnie” But hakyeon never returned that night. ____________________________________ “I hate you” Hakyeon groaned the next morning holding his head between his hands as he sat on the table in wonshik’s kitchen. He watched as the man in subject sent him a sheepish smile before putting some pills and a glass of water in front of him. “Sorry I was so nervous yesterday and didn’t know you wanted to return to your apartment” “Hongbin must be so pissed off that I stood him up, shit” He continued to glare at him even when wonshik avoided his eyes to look at everything in his kitchen as if seeing it for the first time. “A little bit of alcohol never harmed anyone, and we were celebrating hyung, remember?” Came the overjoyed voice from the doorway making hakyeon wince at how loud jaehwan was. “I’m a light drunk, you should’ve stopped me after the second bottle!” Jaehwan rolled his eyes and walked till he stood in front of wonshik, and without hesitation he reached up and kissed the side of his lips whispering a ‘good morning’ and making the tall man blush like a high school girl. Even after witnessing that hakyeon couldn’t believe that his two best friends from college are officially dating, and maybe yesterday’s turn of events was partly because of it. That made him think of his life, he never felt the need to date anyone, and he still remembers the first few years he explored it dating different people, he ended up breaking up with them immediately after a week of going out with them. And three years later he came to a conclusion. That he didn’t need anyone, because no one can ever replace the person who has always been beside him since they were in elementary school. Hakyeon might never know if what he has for hongbin was that kind of love or not, but he kept comparing everyone with that boy it almost sounded stupid for him to do that, but he couldn’t help it. He was dominating every thought he possessed. Hakyeon sighed and walked toward the living room where his phone was charging, he turned on the device praying that he won’t find angry messages from the abandoned boy. And there were 5 missed calls and 3 messages. Great! He opened the messages feeling guilt fill his insides as he read them.

From Hongbi: 1:55 AM. Where the hell are you? It’s so late!

From Hongbi: 2:24 AM. Hakyeon I swear if you don’t call now..

From Hongbi: 3:45 AM. Don’t come home tonight I have a date.

Hakyeon reread the last one over and over trying to detect what was the wrong with it, and when he finally, really, understood his headache intensified and his hand clutched the device painfully. In a second he dialed hongbin’s number and waited, shaking his leg anxiously thinking how he must read it wrong, better, maybe he was still sleeping. “What?” “Yah I’ve never liked the way you joke!” What are you saying idiot?? Hakyeon rolled his eyes at himself, and he heard the other man let out a confused ‘huh’ followed by a stretching silence before he heard a huff and again, hongbin’s deep voice filled his ear. “It’s too early for that! And I wasn’t joking so spend a happy valentine with your wonshik and I’ll spend it with my new date. It’s a win win” HOW IS IT A WIN WIN? Hakyeon wanted to scream feeling his head nearly split in pain. “I don’t care if you’re going on a date I’m spending it at home as usual an-” “No don’t come, we’re spending the date inside” “LEE HONGBIN! YOU AREN’T LETTING ANYONE INSIDE OUR HOUSE ON VALENTINE DAY. IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE OUR DAY!” Hakyeon heard what sounded like snickering but couldn’t really tell from how much his head was pounding. “Hyung chill. I get it we won’t do anything-” “YOU WERE THINKING ABOUT DOING SOMETHING?” “AS I SAID we won’t do anything so don’t worry and have fun there” Hongbin now sounded more awake and more cheerful it pissed him off somehow. He had a date, he’s breaking up their tradition of spending the whole night stuffing their mouths with chicken and chocolate ice cream, laughing while making fun of sappy and cringy romcoms. The reality dawned on him all of a sudden. “You’re kidding me right? Say you’re kidding now and I’ll forgive you” “You sound jealous?” The grin in his tone didn’t go past him and it made him angrier that he longed to see that dimpled wide smile on hongbin’s face even now. “Happy Valentine’s Day hyung, don’t forget to use a condom” The line went dead and the older man stood a long torturing minute staring at the screen. Use a condom? Why the hell would he ask him that? Hakyeon saw a movement at the corner of his eyes and saw the couple watching him warily. “Is everything ok hyung?” Wonshik’s voice cleared up his mind, and for once all the comments about the droopy eyed man being his boyfriend, which hongbin never failed to throw at him whenever he announced he was going to meet him, finally made sense. “That idiot!” ___________________________________ Hongbin was avoiding the apartment like it was the plague. He spent the whole morning at the gym trying to not think about how he acted nonchalantly with hakyeon this morning. The man sounded pissed off but hongbin was amazed that hakyeon didn’t caught on yet on how a mess his actions actually were. After the gym he went to hyuk’s apartment, who humored him and they spent the whole afternoon playing video games. The 2 years younger kid didn’t comment on how weird of hongbin to ditch his nest on valentine day, he knew him long enough to keep in mind how sacred this day was for him. But hyuk being silent didn’t mean Taekwoon who was glaring at him from across the room will be as understanding. “Go back” “I don’t wanna” “Whatever happened between you two keep it that way” Hongbin narrowed his eyes at his hyung contemplating whether he wanted to point out that sadly there’s nothing between hakyeon and him, or if he should just ignore him. The man’s feral eyes went back to his phone as he shook his head slightly and hongbin wondered if he was standing in the way of the love birds’ plans. Duh genius, no one is as pathetically lonely as you. Even hakyeon has someone. Hongbin gritted his teeth watching hyuk take down the enemy easily while he stood there unmoving. Why is he here again? “Fine!” He threw the controller down and stretched watching as taek’s eyes lit up not so discreetly. Hyuk closed the game and stood up looking at him. “You’ve got to communicate hyung” The giant kid said exaggeratedly, he made it sound so easy but again hongbin was known for over analyzing every silly thing. “I’ll keep that in mind” He bent down putting his sneakers on and before he wore his coat and went out a hand stopped him in the doorway, and he turned back to see taek staring at him with kind eyes. “Just remember why you stayed with him all these years, and why you gave up on a lot of things to be with him. The same for hakyeon too” Hongbin looked down at the ground not knowing what to say, but taek as always understood him without uttering anything. “Happy valentine’s day binah. Stay happy” His big hand ruffled his hair and a small smile graced his lips giving reassurance that maybe, everything will turn well at the end. “Call me if you’re doing the deeds tonight” Hongbin had wondered when satan will go back to his usual self, and he glared at the shit eating grin on hyuk’s face. “I hate you” “aish don’t lie” ___________________________________ Upon opening the door to their shared apartment, hongbin noticed the lack of hakyeon’s presence in it. He sighed hanging his coat and leaving his shoes neatly on the side before entering the kitchen. He opened the refrigerator only to see the pack of beers and two boxes of their favorite ice cream in, waiting to be devoured. He stood there for a minute before taking out his phone to send a message to hakyeon, he is done being stupid and he only hopes that hakyeon didn’t really take him up for that suggestion.

To Hakyeonie: 6:02 PM. Change of plans, I might be the one in need for a condom.

Not even a whole minute after came the replay and hongbin couldn’t stop the giggle escaping him.

From Hakyeonie : 6:03 pm. I’M ON MY WAY DAMN IT.

“So easy” hongbin snorted then started setting up the living room with blankets on the couch, a big glass bowl with ice and beers in and of course the list of movies opened in front of him. Fearing that the ice cream will melt he decided to leave it in the refrigerator, and put the bowl of chicken on the table. He then took a quick shower and wore his favorite sweater, a navy blue knitted one that hakyeon bought him for his birthday, and dark ripped jeans. Usually he wouldn’t care about what he wears for hakyeon has seen him in his worst and they even used to shower together when they were children, but today was different. Hongbin could feel it and it sent an excited tremor down his body, his smile never leaving his lips. And even if it wasn’t, hongbin is adamant to stand up for once and do that himself. He was swaying to the melody playing inside his head when the sound of key jiggling in the lock caught his attention, his body immediately fell down on the couch, his shaking hand went through his hair trying to tame the rebellious locks back to place. He looked around noting everything in its place before he stopped and kicked himself mentally. Man, you’re helpless. ___________________________________ The first thing that hakyeon did after entering the apartment was looking around in an urgent manner. “Where is he?” He saw as hongbin, who was sitting tensely on the couch, shifted slightly to the edge. “Who?” Hakyeon gave him the stink face and went to hongbin’s bedroom, his own bedroom but didn’t find anyone. His legs took him to the living room again and before he said anything his eyes roamed around the place, noting how familiar it was. Confused, he sat on the couch beside hongbin whose blank face was starting to make him worried. “Where’s your date?” “There’s no one” The frown only intensified. “But you told me-” “I made it up” He simply replied cutting him off, still not looking toward him. The older man sat there quietly observing hongbin, there were times when words weren’t the best way to force the younger to express himself, actions affected him more and that’s why hakyeon found himself biting back the string of questions bubbling inside him. He only needed to count to ten, when hongbin sighed and leaned forward taking a hold of the remote control and started scrolling through the list. “I was angry that you promised to return yet you stayed there” Hakyeon winced at his words and thought how it was the first time he didn’t hold up to his promise. Maybe he deserved being ignored by him. “I got drunk celebrating and I ended up passing out on his couch” Hongbin paused for a second before licking and biting his lower lip making hakyeon’s eyes follow the movement absentmindedly. “Celebrate what?” “Wonshik finally not being boyfriendless” Hongbin’s head whipped around, looking for the first time since he came back, at him with shocked eyes. “What?” He sighed nodding his head before letting out a tired chuckle. “You should’ve seen the idiot, he was so smitten” “B-but what about you?” “What about me?” Hongbin searched his face for whatever he thought he’ll see, but seemingly failed he instead looked at him incredulously. “You’re ok with that? Him being someone else’s boyfriend?” The older was reminded of that comment right before hongbin hung up on him this morning, and he couldn’t help it when his hand reached up to neck shop the man with as much power as he can put without actually hurting him. And hakyeon really was tempted to do that. “Awww what was that for!!” “For being an idiot! How could you think that there was something between me and wonshik. He’s practically my younger brother!” Hakyeon couldn’t believe this day, he really was exhausted all of a sudden. “I thought…” Hongbin trailed off looking down at his hands guiltily, and as much as his hyung wanted to keep being angry at him, one look to his shaky hands made his insides melt with fondness toward the silly boy. “You’ll be the death for me one day. I lost many years of my life span today” Hongbin rolled his eyes. “You don’t really have much left” Of course he received another hit. “Don’t worry you’re stuck with me for a long time lee hongbin” Hakyeon smiled at the hint of dimple showing on his pale cheek and he took the remote from his hands ushering him toward the kitchen. “Go bring our ice cream babes” ___________________________________ “She’s going to get her heart broken” Hongbin noted. “Nope. She’s going to live happily ever after” Hakyeon replied with a small smile making the younger one roll his eyes. “Stop fighting me about everything” “Stop being so negative about everything. Life can surprise you sometimes” Hongbin shook his head and took another spoon full of the ice cream, he’d be lying if he said his full attention was on the TV screen. If anyone asked him what he remembers from now, it’d be how sexy hakyeon’s lips were stretched around the spoon, well, he doubted anyone would want to know that. “Pay attention” That snapped him out of the gutter and he stared dumbfounded at hakyeon. “What? I’m paying attention!” He saw hakyeon’s eyes twitch as he let out a low hum. “You pay some attention” He remarked happy with his comeback. “I caaan’t, you’re distracting me” Hakyeon all but whined turning his head just in time to catch hongbin’s eyes coming to stare at him like a deer caught in headlights. “W-wha-” Hakyeon’s eyes cut him off as they, like hongbin’s did before, searched his face for something. “S-stop looking at me like that” “But I love looking at you like that” Is he playing with him? Hongbin rolled his eyes again, he does that a lot with this man, and continued watching the TV ignoring him. “Were you always jealous of Wonshik?” He braced himself not to show anything on his face, any reaction could give him away with someone as observant as his hyung, but isn’t that what he needed? To change things between them? “I was feeling neglected since for a long time I’ve been your only best friend” That was hard to admit but even though, hongbin knew that was a cowardice escape, he has always been a man who faced his problems straight ahead and never liked running away. He wants to move on from this damn spot in their relationship but at the same time he feared the change, what would assure him that he won’t lose hakyeon for good if he admitted his real feelings? Or treat him differently, because he knew hakyeon wouldn’t reject him in fear of hurting him. He cherished their friendship so much to let it turn upside down for a bunch of emotions, so he should be satisfied, right? “Is that all what it was about?” Hakyeon sounded neutral, hongbin couldn’t read him this time. When he didn’t say anything hakyeon continued to speak. “What’s your ideal date hongbinnie?” The question was so sudden it took him off guard, ideal date? Why? He voiced his thoughts only to receive a shrug. “I don’t know but for the 17 years we’ve known each other we never discussed such things so I’m curious” He turned his eyes to him and asked again with a low tone. “What’s your ideal date, hongbin?” The younger gulped and shied away from his piercing gaze to look at the TV again, he took his time turning his words in his head before answering hesitantly. “I..you know how I like to go sightseeing? So maybe a walk in the park? Taking photos of each other and I don’t know, eat some ice cream?” He sounded nervous all of a sudden, hell he felt shaken a little bit as if he was laying himself bare to the world to see. It didn’t make sense, since it was always easier for him to talk with hakyeon from anyone else, but maybe because it was him this time that made it all so different right now? Hongbin felt as if his mind is going to explode. “hmm” Hakyeon all but hummed vaguely, his eyes still heavy on the side of hongbin’s face making him fidget on his seat. “Is that why you were persistent on having ice cream in our ritual for valentine day?” The younger frowned but before he asked him what he meant hakyeon shifted his eyes to the bowl of chicken. “Mine is chicken” “Chicken?” Hakyeon nodded as he sat on the edge of the couch touching the bowl with a small smile. “I have always had this clear image in my mind, I mean my ideal date, since I was old enough to know about dating. It’s simple but it never failed to bring joy to my heart” “What is it?” Hongbin whispered not truly noticing how he edged closer to the other as his eyes remained on hakyeon’s lit up face. “Me and my date, sitting on a cozy couch in a cozy room with chicken and ice cream within reach, turning on TV to watch movies only to spend half of it chatting with each other and playing around distracted” The silence that was stretched after went unnoticed by the loud hearted man. His heart was pounding so hard, and his breathing got faster upon locking eyes with hakyeon. No one said anything for the longest time, maybe feeling satisfied with the amount of eye talking they did. But of course, like everything good in life, their moment was ruined by the buzz of hongbin’s phone announcing an unread message. The young man jumped feeling the vibration in his pocket, he reached his hand to take it out only to be stopped by the other. “Leave it” “But..” “Hongbin-ah” His tone was final so hongbin sunk in the couch with a slight pout, making hakyeon chuckle a bit. He reached out and ruffled his soft hair with a teasing grin. “Good boy” Hongbin rolled his eye and swatted his hand away. His heart was still pounding but not as threatening as before, and his lips twitched with a hint of smile. Shit he felt giddy all of a sudden, but can anyone blame him? It might not have lasted more than few seconds but that moment he shared with hakyeon was different from anything he experienced before. He felt scared but more hopeful. “So THIS is your ideal date?” His words were bold, challenging, as if he dared him to say otherwise and hakyeon must have caught it because he nodded, his lips perking up on the side. “Why are you sharing it with me then?” He kept pushing and the older man went along with it. “Do you even have to ask at this point?” “I just don’t understand why” “Maybe it’s for the fact that everyone I came across never made me want to do these things with except with you” Hakyeon inhaled sharply with hongbin mirroring his action. “Maybe, I don’t want anyone but..you” ___________________________________ The raw emotions that swelled in his chest caught him off guard, he has always been an emotional man but to actually feel his eyes sting a bit threw him off. The things hongbin make me feel, he thought embarrassingly. Said man was still in shock, looking at him with wide eyes and dropped jaw, hakyeon wanted to laugh because it took him a long time to say these simple words for the clueless boy to notice his feelings. Yes hongbin was a sharp person, but not when it comes to realizing someone else’s feelings toward him and hakyeon had to deal with witnessing that for the past years alongside many other heartbroken pursuers. He’s so clueless about what draws people to him and it makes hakyeon’s heart swell with fondness. “Huh?” Was the young man’s reaction, hakyeon sighed exaggeratedly and shook his head. “What to do with you Lee hongbin” Hongbin made a face at him, his lips moving to talk only to stop and frown. “What?” “Since when?” Hakyeon shrugged. “Beats me. It was like how I became aware of things as I grew up, my feelings were there too” He couldn’t believe it, how he’s sitting there discussing his feelings almost openly and more, how hongbin took everything in without escaping and running away from him. It felt surreal and it scared him a bit to be honest. Hongbin shifted in his place pulling his legs up, his slightly shaking hands wrapping around his pulled up knees to clutch at his forearms tightly. It was a normal position but hakyeon knew better, hongbin was losing himself to his thoughts. “Stop overanalyzing everything” He whispered inching closer to him, his arm resting over the back of the couch and was so pleasantly surprised when hongbin leaned closer, pressing his side to the older man’s chest. “I can’t help it, everything right now feels unreal” Tell me about it. Hakyeon kept looking at his perfect side profile until the young man raised his eyes shyly to him.

“Are you sure about it?” He would’ve laughed if the situation wasn’t serious, but he knew hongbin very well and he knew he needed reassurance.

“I won’t talk about ten years from now, I’ll just let everything go with the flow. But right now, in this moment, I’m done with running away from my feelings” His hand played with hongbin’s soft hair lightly as he asked him the same. Hongbin only kept looking at him until his eyes flickered down to his lips and hakyeon’s heart started to pick up in a dangerous speed. Oh boy.

Suddenly, tension shifted in the living room, both of them felt almost breathless from the small space between them as they kept looking at each other’s lips. With their breathing mingled, hakyeon had to clutch the back of the couch to stop himself from decreasing the distance and finally tasting his plush lips, hongbin hands weren’t doing any better as he squeezed his arms tightly, he noticed.

Why are you still holding back idiot?

Hakyeon looked up for a sign that he finally can do what he dreamed about doing his whole life, he watched as hongbin’s eyes rose to meet him only to flutter shut a moment later, his long eyelashes resting on his reddening cheeks. Hakyeon took that as his cue and he dove in.

The moment their lips met in the middle hongbin inhaled sharply taking hakyeon’s own breath away, literally. Hakyeon’s pulse skyrocketed insanely, his lips pressing on hongbin’s without moving nor deepening it, the older man felt frozen in that moment. In the back of his mind he registered the fact that he was the one with the most kissing experiences between the two, hell, he wasn’t even sure if this kiss wasn’t hongbin’s first but for some reason he felt like all the courage he summoned today to confess disappeared in thin air. He felt scared shitless and it made him retreat a bit losing the warmth of his lips. But as soon as he did, he felt a warm and slightly shaken hand rest lightly on the back of his neck stopping him from going any further. He opened his eyes to see hongbin studying his face before a small smile with a hint of dimples graced his expression.

“Who’s the one overanalyzing it now, hyung?” Without any other words he closed the space once again but this time, he was the one that took it upon himself to move his lips against hakyeon’s frozen one, forcing him to comply and finally start kissing back. An experimental kiss turned into a deep and heated one as hakyeon’s hands circled hongbin’s lain waist and pulled him even more closer nearly dragging him into his lap. Hongbin’s own hand went around his neck, his fingers tugging softly at his locks while he continued to drive the older man crazy with his lips. Where the hell did he learn how to do that? Hongbin let out a tiny sound as hakyeon bite his lower lip softly only to moan and tug harsher reflexively on his hair when he bite his lips again, this time more hungrily. He needed to clear his head from this fog, with the lack of oxygen and the small sexy noises hongbin was letting out every few seconds made him almost explode. He never regretted wearing jeans until now.

“H-hongbin let’s s-top” He panted in between hongbin’s attack on his lips but the latter didn’t hear him or pretended not to until hakyeon drew back breathlessly.

“Wait I..” His eyes swapped all over the heavy lidded beautiful man in front of him, and when his eyes noticed the bulge in his dark jeans his mind went blank all of a sudden and he couldn’t do anything but to pull him over his lap and press his face in his sweater cladded chest, his hands tightening around his waist.

He wanted him, hongbin really wanted him and he wasn’t dreaming. He could hear his heartbeat from how close he was and he felt hongbin’s hands go around his shoulders and hug him tightly as if he didn’t want to let go of him forever. He felt the same, and felt so many things that made his chest swell so much it hurt.

“this is the best valentine ever” He could almost sense hongbin rolling his eyes as he replied.

“yeah yeah whatever” He giggled when hakyeon drew back to send him a glare.

“you just ruined it you know?”

“I’m not even sorry” hongbin retorted cheekily while he pulled his legs closer leaning his side to hakyeon’s chest comfortably. The latter only smiled as he hugged him allowing him to snuggle closer. He pecked his nose only to have it scrunching with distaste.

“Get used to it hon”

“Omg you did not just call me that!” Hongbin looked scandalized which made him laugh heartily at him.

“I certainly did” Hongbin elbowed him in the rips earning a pained groan.

“you jerk!”

“bastard” the young one bite back smugly before taking the remote and starting the movie again, hakyeon fake pouted before sighing in contentment and snuggling back to him like many times before but this time he knew things have changed. He didn’t know what their future holds but he wasn’t worried about it at all because deep inside he knew, both of them will never change and they’ll be fine.