#I see them romantically but I think they’d take some time to get there | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mistymisfit · 1 month ago

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Can you please make an AK jason a-z nsfw alphabet please. The jason one was so good ❤️🎀

Sorry this took so long 😭😭😭and tysm, i actually didn't think about writing an ak!jason version of this but really enjoyed it (once i got over my writer's block) I think all of them are GN, if not lmk and I'll edit it. Mentions of size difference in point X (i think). original version Minors and blank blogs DNI!!

Dirty A-Z headcanon game

Btw these are all personal headcanons !!! And AK!Jason is waaaay more traumatized than comic Jason. Keep in mind that these are written thinking that reader's a civilian and there's a previous relationship to him being kidnapped as I don't see him trusting anyone new, or if he does, it takes him quite a long time to get to the point of sleeping with them.

A - Alone time (how do they get off when they’re all by themselves? do they watch porn, is it all in their imagination, do they jerk off, do they use toys?)

Let's start by saying this man has a lot of issues with intimacy and sexuality. He thinks those parts of himself are rotten, until he reunites with you. So if he does it's mostly to relieve stress or to chase the dopamine the brain releases, to feel good for at least a moment.

B - Bondage (do they like it? do they not? do they prefer to be the one being tied or the one doing the tying?)

Not to repeat myself, but there's absolutely no way in a million years he's letting himself be tied up. I don't hc him as being a "I suffered so you have to suffer too" with a romantic partner (Batman can go to hell idc) so his feelings on tying you up are pretty much the same, he went through a lot with joker so the sight would only bring back bad memories. After all, he still loves you, even if his way of showing it changed drastically when he came back.

C - Crying (is it a turn on? a turn off? do they cry during sex? have they cried during sex? what was the reason?)

There's no way he isn't crying-- and trying to hide it too. There's a lot of tears involved the first time you do it, what gets him to cry is how soft and gentle you are with him. You reassure him that you love him, you missed him, and that none of that should've happened to him. Your kindness is so foreign to him that he doesn't know what to do with himself, and when you kiss his tears away with your soft lips going over his marked cheek, he shortcuts. He equally wants you to stop and to keep being this gentle, he feels so conflicted that his quiet tears turn into full on sobbing on your shoulder. You were not surprised, in fact, you actually expected him to break down the first few times you got intimate.

D - Dominance (do they prefer to dominate, or be dominated? do they have experience as a Dom? Do they have a Dom that they trust already? What kind of things do they enjoy as/with their Dominant partner?)

He's had no control of his life for years, first following around Batman's orders, trying to be the perfect Robin. Then under Joker's torture. He's lost enough agency and control over his own body that I don't see him giving up any more of it. The most he can do is let you go on top, and even then, he's got a bruising hold on your hips.

E - Extra info (any other fetishes? feet? leather? role playing? blood? fantasies that they might want to experience not on this list?)

He gets a little jealous sometimes, not of other people looking or wanting your attention but of you. Jealous that you got to live a normal life, that your world kept spinning after he was gone. He gets rougher with you on those nights, trying to take out some of his anger.

Manhandling! He gets extra turned on to see how easily he can throw you around, and how much you trust him to not hurt you while doing it.

F - Food play (do they like using food in the bedroom? are there any foods they prefer to use during sex or foreplay? any they’d like to try?)

He's got a lot of hard nos, but I think this one is more of a soft no to him. You could ease him into it if you tried, but after being fed rotten and poisoned food, his relationship with food was severely scared as well. Mixing two things that stress him out (food and sex) is not a good combination. HOWEVER, as he gradually heals, he could let you convince him. In his mind the equation would be something like this: reader= safe so food+ reader= must be safe.

G - Group sex (would they have a threeway? four? an orgy? do they put on a show for spectators? or do they like to keep it just between them and their partner?)

Bro can't even look at himself in the mirror, and barely ever lets you look at his body (see point L). There's no way he's getting more people in the mix, he's got enough worrying about handling his intimacy issues with you. Besides, he said in the Arkham Knight genesis comic he does not share.

H - Humiliation (does degradation and insults get them hot? do they get off on humiliating someone else? what kind of humiliation is good for them?)

Insults do not get him off, for obvious reasons. He's had enough humiliation under Joker's hands to last for five lifetimes. And like I mentioned before, he's not "I suffered so you have too". Yes, you do yell at each other and argue quite often, which ends with name calling from both ends. But that's different, sex is an entirely different thing for him. It's a demonstration of his trust in you, that he loves you even if he can't say it.

I - Impact play (here’s where talking about things like spanking, paddles, canes, floggers and the like.)

I don't think he'd be into it. His relationship with you is something sacred to him, it's perhaps the only thing he got back from his old life, and that's why I think he's so against hurting you. He wants to keep you as separated from the violent aspects of his life as he can so he can at least try to hold onto some sense of normalcy.

J - Jelly (what kind of lube are they using? is it flavored? have they tasted it? do they prefer to use something other than real lube during sex?)

K - Kissing (what parts of their body do they like having kissed? what parts of their partner do they enjoy kissing? do they like leaving marks / having marks left on them?)

Likes forehead kisses, and also likes when you kiss his marked cheek, it proves him you're not scared of him or that you don't think he's a failure. Looooves kissing over your pulse points, staying a little longer to feel your heartbeat under him.

L - Lighting (are the lights on? off? do they have some kind of mood lighting set up?)

Off, he doesn't want to see his scars, doesn't want you to see them either. If the lights are on, then he's keeping most of his clothes on.

M - Masochism (do they like pain? scratching? biting? being bossed around? spoken down to? choked?)

No to all of the above, for reasons previously mentioned. But he's into putting a hand around your neck, doesn't choke you but you definitely feel the heavy weight of his hand. Does not complain if you end up scratching his back tho, I think his pain tolerance got so high that he probably wouldn't even feel it.

N - Not yet (orgasm delay? orgasm denial? do they tell their partner not to touch themselves for a certain amount of time or under certain circumstances? do they delay or deny other things like bathroom usage or food? do they need to beg first? do they like being denied / delayed?)

Would deny himself without even realizing what he's doing. I think it'd be a kind of subconscious self punishment. He'd put off his orgasm in favor of you feeling good until you're overstimulated.

O - Outdoor sex (have they ever done it in public? would they? where?)

Sorry, he's too traumatized to expose himself to situations like this, next.

P - Photography (are cameras allowed in the bedroom? do they send nudes? do they ask for nudes? would they ever record themselves having sex / being caught up in a sexual act?)

Not even with 20 years of healing would he allow this. HOWEVER, I'm a sucker for the "his helmet has a recording option" hc. I think that would be the only way of allowing himself to record these moments since it's from his pov and only gets to see you and not himself.

Q - Quiet please (what’s the volume like in the bedroom? are they quiet? do they scream? do they like a loud partner? do they prefer if their partner is more soft spoken?)

Extremely quiet, like you wouldn't know he's feeling anything if it wasn't for his occasional grunt or shaky breath. He endured torture and was forced to keep quiet in fear of it getting worse if he screamed, so it doesn't come naturally to him.

R - Routine (do they have a routine when it comes to picking up one night stands? do they have scheduled sex with their partner? are things spontaneous or planned ahead of time?)

I think it all depends on how low his self esteem is that day, and how intense his need for closeness and love is. At first, you never initiated it, too afraid to trigger him or make him uncomfortable, but he does not know how to say that he likes it when you seek him out first. He feels wanted, loved, and eventually you pick up on it.

S - Sleepy sex (do they give oral to wake their partner up? do they like receiving oral to wake up? do they like fucking their partner awake? being fucked awake? how about being fucked to sleep at night? do they have lazy morning sex?)

You know what... hell yeah...

He was already awake when you turned around in bed, he sighed a low "morning" with a raspy voice, and you responded by pressing a kiss to his lips. Neither of you knew how it turned into having a hand under each other's pants and then you giggling as he lazily thrusts into you. There's a lot of skin to skin contact, and the room is dark enough for him to feel comfortable taking all of his clothes off. He's still sleepy enough to let a little "i love you" out while you hold him in your arms.

T - Top or bottom (self explanatory…)

U - Underwear (what kind of underwear do they put on in the morning, if any at all… do they own any sexy underwear or lingerie?)

Jason truly does not care, he's got bigger problems and things to carry about lol. But you did jokingly ask him to buy you a cute set in his favorite color so you'd wear it for him, and while you didn't expect him to follow through, he did. You did hold up your part of the deal.

V - Voyeurism (do they like to watch, or are they more hands on? are they more of an exhibitionist?)

Has stalked you before reuniting with you, so he's definitely seen you take care of yourself, he probably feels ashamed of watching you like that, or watching you get dressed, but he'd never tell you about that. In terms of exhibitionism, the most he'd do is fuck you while the men he assigned to watch over you are outside the apartment you were in.

W - Water (pool sex? bath / shower sex? are they into watersports at all?)

I do think in my heart this man would benefit so much from some soft bath sex. Dim lights and a few candles lit nearby. He feels the ache in muscles fade a little, and he lets himself enjoy the intimacy of it. He'd melt at your hands washing his hair and the grime from his body, and then ofc you riding him lol.

X - X-dressing (do they crossdress as a part of teasing / foreplay? does crossdressing turn them on? turn their partner on? do they prefer to do it or watch their partner crossdress instead? do they use other costumes? cat ears, tails, etc?)

His helmet lowkey has cat ears... which could mean nothing...

Not crossdressing again but, the first few nights he took you with him and didn't give you time to bring much of your things so you had to sleep with one of his undershirts. You decided to ditch the pants since they were too big and uncomfortable. He stopped by to see you, and you stood rubbing your eyes on the door frame of your bedroom. A soft "Jay? is that you?" left your lips, and his eyes wandered over your figure. You were rubbing your eyes with one hand while the other pulled down the hem of the shirt for more coverage.

He was oddly relieved to find out he could still get hard that easily.

Y - Yes, Master (what kinds of names are used during sex? do they like being called master / mistress, daddy, etc…? what names do they call their partner?)

If you had any nicknames at all before he was kidnapped, you'd strictly call each other that during these moments. He's doing everything he can to grab onto that nostalgia from a time when it was simpler, when your relationship was simple. You didn't need to jump through hoops to understand him, and he could tell you what he felt and wanted. The familiarity helps the gears on his brain turn slower, he even feels time moves slower with you sometimes.

Z - Zones (what are their erogenous zones? what spots on their body should be touched, bitten, kissed, when someone wants to get them in the mood?)

Most of his body is covered almost all the time, so if you took one of his gloves off, or pulled his clothes to uncover some skin so you could kiss it, he'd die on the spot. What do you mean you want to see him? That you only want to kiss his skin, no matter how scarred or broken? You think he's worth kissing no matter what, and you mean that.

#omg 2 posts in a month who is sheee #w: jason #jason todd x reader #ak!jason todd x reader #jason todd smut #ak jason todd smut #ak jason todd x reader smut #ak jason todd x reader fluff #it does get kinda fluffy i cant help it #he needs a hug fr #jason todd x reader smut #red hood x reader #okay im tired of tagging #que sea lo que dios quiera #bye

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starsinthesky5 · 17 days ago

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I just know songbird and joe go FERAL after not seeing each other for a while!! Like they were both busy a good two months of being away from each other… she was traveling he had some things to get done but once they crossed paths again oh my god the bed HATES to see them coming. I just know they have the most romantic, slow, deep, mouth-foaming, eye-rolling, filthy-worded intimate time known to mankind. Hands? Everywhere. Walls? Vibrating. Back? Arched. They physically can't get enough a round after a round and another round? yeah they’re not holding back🤭

a/n: feeling THINGS while writing this. ily for this one anon, i was thinking about this all day <3

warnings: smut & nsfw content below! (is it hot in here or is it just me)

wc: 1.3k

───────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆───────

oh my god YES YES YESSSS. you get it. YOU GET IT!!!!

absolutely. this is so them. but they’ve never actually been apart for that long. honestly, two months? it’s laughable. it’s cruel. they’d crumble by week two, if not sooner. joe’s antsy, checking flight prices at two in the morning; she’s curled up in hotel beds that feel too big and too cold without him. one of them would cave—always—and book the next red-eye without a second thought, showing up with tired eyes and open arms just to be back where they belong...together.

early on, before she moved in with him, she was constantly on the move—slipping through cities under the radar. new york, her hometown, sometimes london. music things, spending time with family and friends, slowly rebuilding her life. and joe couldn’t come along, not during the season. so they clung to phone calls and blurry facetimes, sending selfies and voice notes and little gifts to bridge the space between them. they counted every day. every hour. because being apart? it wasn’t just lonely—it was unnatural.

and the second she’s back in cincy with him?

it’s over.

for example—she went to her london house with some of her best friends for two weeks to celebrate her best friend’s engagement in october. it was supposed to be this magical, dreamy, all-girls getaway. the streets of notting hill were bright and busy, cafes buzzing with life, flower stalls on every corner, and her apartment penthouse above the bookstore was packed with laughter and champagne corks popping. they went shopping on oxford street, took polaroids in front of pastel townhouses, spent lazy afternoons in hyde park, and danced until the sun rose in tiny clubs tucked beneath the city.

she loved it—loved the way her girls filled the space with joy, how she got to celebrate love with them, how her cheeks hurt from smiling. and god knows she needed to feel that after everything she’d went through, and was still going through.

but every time she slipped away for a second—on the balcony in the cool evening air or under the covers when the room finally went quiet—she ached for him.

because nothing about that trip, no matter how lovely, felt complete without joe.

two weeks in london with her best friends sounds dreamy on paper, but for them? for her and joe? it’s actual torture.

the nights?

the nights were the worst.

because that bed they used to share when joe was here briefly over the summer? it felt empty without his broad frame pressed behind her. she’d wake up reaching for him, only to find cool sheets and silence. and yeah, her friends teased her for how often she checked her phone, how often she snuck off to take a call or send a voice note, but she couldn’t help it. she missed him so much.

and joe? back in cincy, restless as hell. he couldn’t sleep. couldn’t even sit still. kept pacing the house in his gray sweats, wearing the hat she left behind like it was armor. he’d fall asleep with his phone in hand, only to wake up to grainy 2 am facetime calls from her with that soft, sleepy “hi, baby” that cracked him open every time.

they tried to stay normal. tried to play it cool. but by day ten?

they were spiraling.

joe’s texts were getting filthier by the hour, all groaned out “i miss your mouth” and “i’d give anything to be inside you right now,”. her replies weren’t much better—photos that never made it past the safety of their messages, audios he’d play on loop when he was alone, soft gasps and moans and whispered “wish you were here, baby,”.

it reached a point where even her friends were like “you know what? just go home to your man,” and she almost did.

but it’s joe who caves first.

because she sends a video—just her in his shirt, curled up in bed, pouting at the camera with that little “i miss you, joey”—and he snaps.

he instantly charters out a private jet for her, knowing damn well she could’ve done that herself, and even pays for the rest of her friend’s engagement celebration because he was calling her home a few days earlier than planned. it was the least he could do.

and when she touches down in his city? texts him that she just passed their spot? joe’s already posted up by the door, pacing like a man on edge. the second she steps inside his house, that look in his eyes shifts into something carnal. like she’s the only thing he’s wanted, needed, ached for, and now he finally gets to have her again. it’s not just lust—it’s longing. it’s built up in every unread text and late-night call and empty side of the bed.

her suitcase barely hits the floor before his hands are on her. her back hits the wall. their mouths crash. it’s wild and dizzying and filthy, all teeth and tongue and breathless “fuck, i missed you” moans against her skin. his hands are under her shirt, down the back of her jeans—everywhere at once, like he doesn’t know what to touch first.

clothes? gone. scattered across the floor like casualties.

she’s already gasping, whispering things like “you feel so good, joe—missed you so bad, baby, i missed you,” and he’s groaning, deep and wrecked, muttering “been going insane without you. two fuckin’ weeks, baby? never again,”.

the first round is pure chaos. it’s desperate hips, messy kisses, her legs wrapped around his waist as he thrusts into her like a man unhinged. he’s groaning into her neck, and she’s digging her nails into his back, pulling him closer, closer, closer. their bodies are frantic—needy—like they’re trying to erase every second they spent apart by fusing into each other.

and then round two?

god.

slow. deep. raw.

he’s got her on the bed now, body stretched out beneath him, her fingers tangled in his hair, his mouth pressed to her chest as he murmurs all the things he couldn’t say over the phone.

“missed you every fucking night. couldn’t even sleep in our bed without picturing you in it. came in my hand just thinking about you, baby,”.

he grips her thigh and slides in deeper, watching her face twist with pleasure, and it does something to him. because he knows he’s the only one who gets to see her like this—completely open, vulnerable, his. and she’s whispering back, all breathy and broken, “i’m yours, joe. always. fuck…,” and he can barely hold it together.

they don’t stop. they can’t.

they go again. and again.

there’s laughter in between, forehead kisses, little jokes when he fumbles with a blanket or she nearly trips getting up for water. she teases him for how needy he is and he just smirks, pulling her right back into bed. there are marks on her thighs, her neck, soft bruises she wears like love letters. his jaw is stubbly against her skin and she loves it—loves when he gets a little rough, a little growly, when he can’t stop telling her how fucking much he missed her, how she’s everything.

at some point, they forget what time it is. maybe the sun’s rising. maybe the stars are out. doesn’t matter—they’re back together, and that’s the only thing either of them cares about.

it’s not just sex. it’s homecoming. it’s sacred. it’s love in the most carnal, intimate form.

and after?

they pass out in a tangle of limbs, hair messy, bodies sticky and sore, hearts full. joe’s got his arm around her waist, her leg slung over his hip, and neither of them lets go.

not even in their sleep.

#joe burrow #joe burrow x reader #yail #yail asks #joe burrow blurb #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow smut #joe burrow fic #joe burrow fanfic #joe burrow bengals #cincinnati bengals #bengals #joe burrow fan fic #joeburrow #nfl fan fic #nfl imagine #nfl

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luveline · 1 year ago

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I love your writings about the marauders, and I recently had a thought about the boys first coming in contact with a vibrator or any sex toy really. Not even a like smut thing but just then walking into a muggle sex shop or they made a friend with a muggle girl and they stumble upon in some way lol idk, just a funny thought that’s been making me giggle a bit. If you have any thoughts I guess?? Hope you have a good day :)

this isn’t smut but it is explicit - mdni please! fem, 1k

“What is that?” Sirius asks.

You get yanked back. “God, sorry,” James says, letting go of your hand. You’d been in a weird fugue state of joy with his fingers twined in yours; it’s the first time he’s held your hand. You can’t tell if it’s platonic or romantic, you can never tell with the boys. “Wait, what is that?”

“What’s what?” you ask, trying to follow their gaze. You’re on a crowded high street divided by a two way road. It’s so loud you can’t hear yourself think, and stopping as you have has diverted foot traffic around you poorly.

“There’s a cock in the window.”

Remus yelps a laugh. You smile, befuzzled, as he takes your shoulders into his hand and turns you bodily to the right shop window. “Oh,” you say. “Oh! There really is.”

There is a vast array of the aforementioned appendage in the window, and in a variety of sizes and colours. A mannequin in dark lingerie holds a fifty percent off sign to the left, while a poster brags a multitude of ‘stimulating pleasures’ to be found inside.

“What am I looking at?” Sirius asks.

You forget sometimes how sheltered they all are. They’d gone to a rather elite boarding school, and they all lived in rural England and Wales for their summers. This is as city as they’ve ever been, and you’d thought they’d seen everything there is to see by now, but apparently not.

How are you supposed to explain a sex shop? Better, why is fate making you? They all turn to you for an explanation.

“Remus, you’re twenty three,” you say hopelessly.

“We’ve only recently relocated,” Remus argues.

“You’ve known me for six months. You’ve lived here for eight.”

“And yet we’ve never seen that,” James says, pointing at the lingerie. “You’re such perverts in the city. Why are there rainbow cocks in the window?”

“Can we stop saying that?” you ask.

“Sorry,” James says quickly. “Lovely girl, why are the dicks in the window?”

“They’re toys,” you say, feeling a little part of yourself shrivel away in shyness, their eyes like heat from your face and neck.

“For kids?” Sirius asks, disgusted.

“No! God, no, they’re for grown ups.” You shake your head uselessly. “Are you messing with me? You’ve really never seen them?”

“We’ve seen some rather tasteful underwear in our time,” Sirius says, to James’ delight and Remus’ derision.

“Stop,” Remus says.

“We have to go in. I must understand these toys,” Sirius says, ignoring him with ease. There’s something to his usually nice smile you don’t know, some burning excitement that will likely end in innuendos and teasings galore for you.

You make your way into the sex shop, shoes dragging, cheeks hot. James and Sirius seem as though they could burst into laughter at any second, but Remus is more understanding. He offers you his hand when he realises you’re behind them. You don’t have the strength to refuse him.

They’re the weirdest friends you’ve ever had, but also the best ones. They love holding hands and crossing legs and laying half on top of each other when they come around to watch a film. You’re pretty sure you saw James and Remus kissing a few weeks ago, but they’ve yet to say anything about it to you, so what do you know? You’d been jealous, but each boy has continued to love on you just a little too much considering the parameters of your ‘friendship’.

This lies firmly outside of your parameters, you decide.

Sure, you’ve thought about them sometimes as more than friends, but they don’t know that. Can you be blamed? They’re all so handsome in awful ways —Remus classic, Sirius Grecian, and James devilish. James. You shake your head in an attempt to dispel thoughts of their good looks while in close proximity to lacy knickers, turning your attention to the ridiculous gasps of awe the two idiots are letting out.

“What is that?” Sirius asks delightedly, knuckling at a row of plastic sex toys, all with different functions.

“That’s a…” You blow a breath up your face in an attempt to cool down. “Read the label, Siri.”

“Most of this stuff is for girls?” James asks you.

“I guess so.” You poke at the pink packaging of a glass massage wand. “I mean, not always. I think anybody can use all this stuff too. Or most of it.”

“What about that?”

James points at a vibrator in clear blister packaging. “A vibrator? What’s that do?” He turns to you with a surprisingly innocent curiosity.

“It vibrates.” You don’t want to say anything else, but they’re your friends. They’re nice to you, and they respect you, so it’s not like you think telling them these things will put you in an uncomfortable position. “You know how girls have a harder time finishing sometimes?”

If they’re surprised to hear you say it aloud, they don’t show it. “Not in my experience,” Sirius jokes.

“So the vibration helps?”

“It’s very intense. It makes the… climax come much quicker,” you say.

Remus seems very grateful for the energy your explanation takes, giving you a caring smile. He’s about to say something when Sirius interrupts, and asks, “Do you have one?”

“You don’t have to answer that,” Remus says, hitting Sirius in the arm. “She doesn’t have to answer that, don’t ask her stuff like that, it’s private.”

Sirius’ eyes go wide. “I’m sorry,” he says to you, all joking gone from his face. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way. Just forget sometimes that you have boundaries we don’t have.”

You’re not expecting such a genuine and sudden apology, because maybe Sirius shouldn’t ask, but you totally understand what he means. You feel like you’ve known them all your life. “It’s okay, don’t worry. I know what you’re like.”

“So it’s a good time, hypothetically,” James says.

“What do you reckon that feels like?” Sirius asks, already moving on.

“Sirius,” Remus pleads.

“Sweetheart, can I ask you, hypothetically,” —Sirius taps his converse to yours, grinning— “what do you mean, it’s quicker? How does that even work?”

You frown, “You don’t know how it works?”

Remus and James laugh like bellows beside you. They laugh so much the woman behind the counter glares at you all, undoubtedly tired of people coming in here for a laugh.

“Awful girl,” Sirius says, frowning.

You smile back. “It just stimulates the nerves, Sirius. I don’t know how to explain it. I guess it’s kinda like magic or something.”

“Magic can’t do that,” James says. Remus elbows him hard, and you’ve no idea why.

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itsnathateasy · 7 months ago

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aot characters reacting to you asking them “what are we?”

warnings: just fluff word count: 1,1k author's note: this was a bit silly hehe, too silly, it broke my heart because they’re all drawings and not people

⭑🌻 ⭒🤎 . ✦ 🙈 . ⁺ . ✦ 🙈 . ⁺ . ✦ 🙈 . 🤎⭒🌻 ⭑

eren dies and i mean DIES to make things official with you but, let’s face it, eren’s a scaredy cat when it comes to matters of the heart. he does, however, reassure you that he’s thinking seriously about you two and that you’re really important to him, but he wants to take things slow

armin blushes all over but has the biggest and happiest smile on his face. he’ll have you sit down and talk through things together, making what was a situationship, now official. he stutters all the time, not because he’s shying on you, but he’s so excited, his words are trying to match the pace of his thoughts and he just stumbles over his words A LOT. he’s also trapping your knees between his own in an attempt to face you the entire time of your conversation, your hands intertwined on both of your knees

HEAR ME OUT, but mikasa probably gives you a glare, her eyes as wide as physically possible and exclaims “we’ve been dating for all these months, what do YOU think we are y/n?”, then grabs onto your hand, intertwining your fingers together, scooting closer to you on the couch and shushes you, “don’t interrupt movie night with silly questions”

levi is kind of like mikasa, in the sense that in his head, you’ve also been a couple for quite some time now, but when you surprise him with his question, he’d simply sigh, and hold both of your hands in his. he’d explain that even though this is what he thinks it might be the right time “to make it official in a proper way, right?”, looking up at you with a crooked smile. he’d kiss your hands and strike you with a “do you want to be my silly lil girlfriend/boyfriend y/n?” “why would you call me silly levi?” “we’ve been dating for 7 months and you dare ask me what we are… i know what YOU are and it’s “very silly”, as previously stated”

hange doesn’t even get it and responds with “uhm what are you talking about? we’re comrades” they said as they dag in the garden, their current project being “planting lilies”. you kneeled down beside them, proceeding to helping them with the holes on the ground. if hange paid one tiny look at your face, they’d know you were upset by their response, but instead, they kept on babbling about the plants and shared all the new information they’d learned about soil and seeds. what really got to them, was how you never responded to any of their statements. “something wrong y/n?” “yes hange, i asked you what we are and you said “comrades”, is that all i am to you? after all this time?” at this moment, you could see the confusion in hange’s face, the gears in their mind finally rolling. “oh y/n, i thought you meant right now cause we’re still on scout premises, you know… i think we’re a very happy, romantic couple and i’d like things to stay this way. but when on duty, we’re comrades” they said and gave you a sweet peck on the lips, you face becoming greasy with soil from their hands as they cupped your cheeks.

erwin is upset, what kind of stunt are you pulling on him? “we’re married, y/n. have been for 2 years now. what is this little game of yours?” he said and crossed his arms, staring at you intently. it was extremely difficult to hold back your laughter, it almost felt that you were about to choke trying to hold your breath. “it’s just a joke erwin, i’m filming your reaction” you explained and pointed to where you’d hidden your phone, camera capturing the both of you. “you and your pranks” he said, while grabbing the phone in his hand and saying “she got me… AGAIN!”, camera on him, then handed the phone back to you, kissing you on the temple. “we’ll sort this out later”

ymir will simply smile contently at you and hold your hand, a silent reassurance that you’re a thing. ymir tends to be more on the shy side, so she conveys many emotions through physical touch and by giving you certain “looks” and tons of special treatment, but you’ve come to know this is her way of expressing her feelings towards you

connie wasn’t expecting this conversation to happen right now, but he’s the calmer of group. “imma put this out there y/n and i hope i won’t regret it” he took a deep breath in as he held both of your hands in his, thumbs softly pressing down on your skin. “i know we agreed to be casual but this isn’t working for me anymore. i want us to properly be together, if that’s what you want too of course” he paused and waited for your response, avoiding your gaze. you responded with “of course it’s what i want too co-” but before you could finish his name, he hugged you tightly, squeezing your breath out of you and kissing all over your face the moment he pulled away. “is it too early to ask you to meet my mum?” connie pleaded innocently.

jean will play it nonchalant, as if he wasn’t about to burst and die because he wasn’t sure about your situation either, but was too scared to be the one to ask you first! “the talk” is quite welcome though, you can see how jean seemed more calm the more you talked about your situationship and where it might lead you, agreeing that you’re in it for the long run. he’s been giving you the puppiest of eyes throughout your conversation, only shifting his gaze elsewhere to put a strand lock of hair behind your ear or to caress your cheek. did i mention he has the goofiest smile? you almost thought he might be having a stroke, but poor boy is just so in love with you, he can’t believe you’re also in love with him.

sasha freaks out and begins to jitter. “what do you mean “what are we” y/n? are we not lovers? romantic lovers? very much in love? did i do something wrong? have i hurt you? what did i do?” you have to stop her rumbling by physically shutting her mouth with your hand and explain that everything’s fine between you, you simply wanted to clear any ambiguities and talk things through, but as you explained your trail of thought and why “the talk” was so important to you, you noticed sasha was spacing off, the look on her face turning more and more absent by the second. “hey, are you still here?” you’d question, but sasha’s response was “what’s an “ambiguities” baby?”

read part 2

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penkura · 6 months ago

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OP Men as Dads Part 3

Note: Part 3, Part 3!! I was asked by someone on AO3 to add Luffy, so I did that! I still view Luffy more as a brother or son, so I still don't expect to write anything romantic for him, but this I can do! I hope you all enjoy!

Franky probably didn’t even think he’d ever get the chance to have kids, not after the train accident you know, but he’s excited for it! You’d have two boys around three to four years apart that are just like Franky in every way, but the older would be a bit more shy than the younger. They’ll both spend a lot of time with Franky in his workshop when they get old enough, they’ve got a knack for shipwright work and it almost brings a tear to Franky’s eye to see them sketching their own ship designs on whatever scraps of paper they can find. Your boys love you too of course! The two will bring their drawings to show you and ask your opinion, you have to tell them everything on your mind or they won’t go back to drawing, mama’s thoughts matter! It becomes family time to go over the sketches your boys made during the day, they want to do you and Franky proud in everything, but nothing they do could ever make you love them less.

Katakuri has planned to have kids for a while, even though he’s already 48, he still wants to have a few and be a father to them. He’ll raise them differently from how he was raised, but still love them dearly and want only the best for them! You’ll both be surprised when you only have one first, a little girl who has Katakuri wrapped around her finger as soon as she’s born and handed to him. She’s so tiny, he’d be content to have just her if she’s all you were blessed with. Fast forward five years and there’s a set of wailing triplets that you also didn’t expect to have, but the three boys are more than you ever could’ve asked for and their big sister loves them just as quickly. She begs to see them as soon as their born, Katakuri brings her by that day to see you and them, and she has to gold all three in a row immediately. After that, a set of twin girls comes along a few years later, your oldest isn’t the only girl anymore and she’s still just as happy to have new siblings at around ten-years-old, your five-year-old set of triplets also excited. Katakuri loves and thanks you so much for the family you’ve made with him, even if you tell him your twin girls are it, you’re done. He's happy with what you have, grateful for your love and children.

Killer is absolutely a great dad, you couldn’t have asked for anyone better to be your partner and father to your children. You have a boy first off, with your eyes and blond hair, he wants to be just like his dad when he grows up! A couple years later comes a little girl, she’s a surprise but a pleasant one at that. You didn’t really expect her to have Killer wrapped around her finger in a heartbeat but the second he saw her it was over, he became wholly devoted to your little girl and making sure she was happy as could be. You’ve come back to your family multiple times seeing Killer either having a tea party with your daughter or playing some make believe game with both your children, he normally plays the damsel in distress for their enjoyment. Your kids can see people act oddly around Killer when they recognize him, but neither of them care to know why, they’re still quite young, and they only care that they’re dad loves and takes care of them alongside you. All that matters to them is that Killer is around to play with them and eventually start teaching them to protect themselves.

Luffy would be the fun dad, no doubt in my mind! Like how Ace would have three daughters, I can see Luffy having three sons! Probably twins at first, then another son a couple years later, the three having the same dynamic that he had with Sabo and Ace when they were kids! They’d all look like Luffy, except your middle child would have your eyes, a small piece that shows yes, you’re the mother to these three rugrats. All three dream of being pirates, its their favorite game to plan, especially so since their dad is King of the Pirates. After all, who better to tell you how the pirate life works than him?? With all of the Straw Hats around, your sons would be protect from the moment they hear you’re pregnant, everyone being the best aunts and uncles around as soon as they’re born. Luffy would be the most protective of course, but he’d still give your sons the freedom to do what they want and to grow and learn how the world works. Being a pirate is about freedom, isn’t it? Your sons will never have to wonder if they’re loved or wanted, everything you and Luffy do is for them.

I honestly see Mihawk with one child, a daughter. She’d be an unexpected blessing that has him around her tiny finger the moment she takes her first breath. He’d never let her, or you of course, out of his sight, unless he absolutely had to go to a Warlord meeting or something like that. When Zoro and Perona show up, they’re both flabbergasted that the Dracule Mihawk has a child, and that she’s a cute baby girl, only a few months old! Perona will try to dress her up in frilly dresses but your daughter will cry, which ends with Mihawk taking her back and demanding Perona stop using his daughter like a dress up doll. The funny thing is, your daughter will be absolutely enthralled with Zoro, she’ll fuss until he holds her, sometimes he’s the only one who can get her down for a nap or to sleep at night. The number of times Mihawk has caught Zoro training with your daughter strapped to his back or the two napping together warms his heart, maybe having the two freeloaders around isn’t so bad.

Sabo never thought too much about having kids. It was a nice idea, but he didn’t have any strong opinions about it. Then of course, you showed up and he started to have dreamy ideas of his own family and children with you as the mother. Your first is a little girl, blonde as her dad and just as rambunctious. She’ll chase down everyone that she can’t to play with her and grab their attention for whatever story she’s made up, Sabo especially listens intently to her, giving her a smile, asking questions, and responding to everything she says positively. After your daughter comes two boys, one after the other just a couple years apart, and both times Sabo can’t believe he’s so lucky to have you and your children. Your sons look more like you, though your youngest has Sabo’s hair just like your daughter. He’s more shy than either of his siblings, but with Sabo he’s more open and talkative. Your first son may be the middle child, but he’s also the one who becomes more interested in the Revolutionary Army’s work. Although Sabo knows that all of them may become interested one day, wanting to join, he hopes that their work can be completed first and your children will be able to love safe, comfortable lives as they grow up.

#one piece x reader #reader insert #luffy x reader #monkey d luffy x reader #mihawk x reader #dracule mihawk x reader #franky x reader #cyborg franky x reader #charlotte katakuri x reader #katakuri x reader #sabo x reader #killer x reader

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yeostinys · 7 months ago

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My Dear Darling

Chapter 2

Pairing: Frat OT8!ATEEZ x Female Reader

Genre: Eventual Smut 18+, Fluff, Angst, Polyamorous Relationship!

Notes: NonIdol!AU, CollegeAU. Nothing too crazy in this chapter. Explicit language. Polyamorous Relationship, (if you are not into that just pls ignore)

Word Count: 6k

Synopsis: You enter new water as ATZ makes you question your own feelings, but tries to make you feel as comfortable as possible.

previous >>> next chapter

———————————————————————

“You guys… want me to be in a romantic relationship with all of you. At the same time?” You cock and eyebrow at them. You feel like this is a prank. A joke they put together to mess with you.

“Yes. Of course we understand this might be a foreign thing for you. However, if you are willing to give this a try, we’d like if you give us a chance to show you what we can offer. Take you on dates, get to know us more. The option is completely up to you. If you do not wish to comply, we can forget this conversation ever happened. We only want what you want, Y/N.” Hongjoong explains.

“Have… you done this with other girls before?” You ask. Genuinely curious, you never thought ATZ would be into poly relationships. You assumed they’d all be pretty possessive over their significant others.

“We have before with just one previous person. But it didn’t last long. She got too involved with one member and only wanted him. We weren’t for it. So we all collectively agreed to let her go.” Hongjoong replies. You’re shocked. The boys look at you as if they’re trying to figure out what you’re thinking.

“Y/N, You don’t have to give us an answer now” Seonghwa speaks up. You look at him and he’s giving you a gentle look.

“We know that this can be a lot to take in. If you want to try this out, let us know. If you don’t, you don’t even have to contact us. We will understand” Jongho chimes in.

You open your mouth to speak when you are all interrupted with someone walking through the front door. San is home.

“San, you’re here just in time” Wooyoung says as he moves towards San to drag him to the couch. San looks at you with a blank face. You reciprocate the look and turn your attention back to the rest of the boys.

“Were you going to say something Y/N?” Yeosang asks. You look at all 8 men now sitting infront of you. San is sitting on the couch arm rest with his arms crossed still staring at you.

“I… need some time to think. Last night was a long night for me I didn’t get much sleep in. so… I’ll tell you guys my answer soon. I just need some rest-“ You hesitate to say as you begin to rise from your chair.

“Y/N you don’t have to explain yourself we understand. I apologize if we came on too strong.” Yunho says as he makes his way towards you.

“I’ll take you home” Yunho looks at you worried.

“No I’m sorry. I’m not judging you guys it’s just… need some time to think over stuff” You say as you look at all the men in front of you. They look at you with genuine concern. But in understanding of what you may be feeling, they nod and bid you a goodbye.

Yunho walks you out the door and you turn towards him,

“Yunho… you don’t have to walk me home. I… want to be alone. I hope you understand” You say.

“Oh yeah… of course. Thank you Y/N for coming by. I’ll see you around.” Yunho says with a soft smile and waves goodbye to you.

——

Yunho walks back inside the house with a loud sigh.

“I thought you were walking her home?” San says raising his eyebrow.

“Yeah well she asked to be alone so… I’m sure she’s probably terrified of us” Yunho slumps onto the couch and rubs his eyes with his palms.

“I don’t think so…” Jongho says tapping his chin.

“What do you mean?” Wooyoung says turning to the youngest member.

“Well, if she was terrified of us and didn’t want to be in this type of relationship with us, she would’ve rejected us on the spot” Jongho says as he continues,

“Like she said, she’s just taking in the information and will get back to us soon. Meaning she might be interested or might not be. It’s a 50/50 chance.” Jongho finishes his statement and rises from the couch.

“Yes, Jongho is right. So no bothering Y/N until she approaches us.” Hongjoong says as he stands up with Jongho and points at all of the men.

“Especially you Wooyoung” Hongjoong glares at him.

“What do you mean?! I understand what personal space is!” Wooyoung raises both his hands as he defends himself.

“Did we come off as too strong last night?” Yeosang questions as he pouts. Obviously bummed that you left so quickly.

“I told you guys each of us asking for her number the same night would’ve been weird” Yunho mumbles.

“If you felt like that then why didn’t you push it on us harder to stop!” Mingi argues.

“We were all buzzed last night!” Wooyoung exclaims.

“Okay seriously everyone stop! Y/N didn’t reject us nor did she accept us. Just give her some space and don’t go seeking out for her until she approaches us. We don’t want to come off too pushy” Seonghwa speaks up trying to calm down everyone. The boys look at the Seonghwa and sighs.

“Hwa is right. Does everyone understand?” Hongjoong crosses his arms in frustration. The boys nod in agreement and disperse from the living room.

——

You walk back home trying to process the confession you just received. Normally, in a crisis like this, you’d confide in Jia or Mina. However, in this situation, you feel that it’s not your place to tell anyone about ATZ’s relationship dynamic. It was obvious that no one knew they were into polygamy. Making your way back into your apartment you slump down on your bed and release a loud sigh. Grabbing a pillow and throwing over your face you scream. Naturally you fall asleep… you weren’t lying to them when you said you didn’t get any sleep the night before. You were exhausted from studying and partying right after. Not only that, your feelings became all out of wack. You needed to rest and so did your heart.

A week has passed since you last seen or spoken to ATZ. You noticed Jongho was avoiding you in class. You assumed it was because he didn’t want to evade your privacy or seem pushy about the lingering questions he and the rest of the boys may have had. You thought avoiding the question and the thoughts would naturally lead you back to your normal lifestyle. But it didn’t.

You sat on the edge of your messy bed, surrounded by a mountain of textbooks, scribbled notes, and empty coffee cups, remnants of late-night study sessions that often spiraled into daydreams. Your thoughts drifted to them—ATZ, realizing each of them had captured a piece of your heart in their own unique way. And you can’t deny it any longer.

Wooyoung’s playful laughter always cut through the noise. He had a knack for turning any party or event into something even more lively, his antics drawing everyone into his orbit. It was hard not to smile when he was around, his energy infectious and uplifting.

Seonghwa was someone you admired from a distance. His caring nature was evident in how he treated others, always ready with a kind word or a thoughtful gesture. You also remember your interaction with him that night he asked for your number, the way his persona was switched into a charismatic confident person, made you more curious to be with him. and Hongjoong with his stupid humble confidence and teasing remarks. Though you hadn’t had many direct interactions with him, the way he carried himself as a person only made you fall for him more.

Yunho, with his gentle and loving spirit, was a pillar of support. Those summers you two spent together as he listened with an attentive ear, making you feel like your words mattered. Conversations with him flowed naturally, often deep and reflective, leaving you feeling understood and cherished. There was something profoundly comforting about his presence that made you want to share everything.

Then there was Mingi, His magnetic charm that was hard to resist, always ready with a joke or a playful comment. His confidence and humor ignited a thrill within you, a fun challenge that kept your heart racing. Mingi could light up the darkest days, and you found yourself drawn to his lively spirit.

Yeosang, gorgeous as ever. With his mysterious aura that intrigued you, pulling you in like a moth to a flame. Those months you spent together last semester in the library studying lingered in your mind. Despite his quiet nature, he loved to engage in deep conversations, revealing layers of himself that fascinated you. You felt as though you were uncovering secrets every time he spoke, and the allure of his complexity kept you captivated.

Jongho, stupidly handsome and humble, he had a refreshing honesty that grounded you. You appreciated his directness, finding solace in his no-nonsense approach to life. He had a way of making things clear, cutting through the confusion with simple truths that resonated deeply.

And then San. Cold and seemingly distant, he was a puzzle you longed to solve, even though you two have a rough history. Beneath his mysterious exterior lay a warmth you remember but rarely saw nowadays. You couldn’t help but feel that he secretly still cared for you, and that thought both thrilled and terrified you. The intensity of his gaze lingered in your mind long after you had walked away, leaving you with an ache that was both confusing and exhilarating.

Each of these eight men added a unique shade to your life, painting your days with a kaleidoscope of emotions—excitement, confusion, longing. You found yourself caught in a whirlwind of affection, each connection offering its own thrill and challenge. As you navigated the complexities of your feelings, the idea of exploring these relationships further both excited and frightened you. In that tiny, cluttered space where you spent so many hours—distracting yourself with work—you felt the stirrings of something profound. The prospect of uncovering the depths of your feelings for them all ignited a spark of hope, a glimmer of possibility amidst the chaos of your college life. Each day without seeing or hearing from them felt like a story waiting to unfold, and you were eager to see where it would lead.

So you get up from your messy bed, put on a fitted top and baggy sweats and headed out your door.

You glanced at your phone 11:35pm.

(Fuck) you mentally say to yourself. It’s late why are you deciding to go see them now? Your mind tells you to go back home, but your legs and heart tell you to keep going forward. Regardless you continue walking. Picking up your speed, eager to see them, you felt a drop of water on your nose. You look up and see a light sprinkle of rain coming down.

(you have got to be fucking kidding me) you curse to yourself. You start to jog, you’re not that far from the frat house. Your heart beats faster. You don’t know if it’s from the adrenaline of running or the growing feelings for the men you were craving to see in this very moment.

You finally arrive at the front door you were once at a week ago. You’re a panting mess, drenched in the rain that began to pour faster. You buzzed the door bell and waited for what felt like an eternity. Finally the door clicks open, and you’re greeted with a confused Hongjoong. Eyes widen at your current state. Unconsciously, you run towards him and wrap your arms around his neck. Hugging him tightly.

“I’m sorry I came so suddenly” you whisper. still panting trying to catch your breath. Hongjoong hugs you back tightening his grip holding you closer. He sighs in relief. “God Darling why did you run here in the rain” he whispers back. You finally pull away from him and realize you got his white tshirt and gray sweats all wet.

“Hongjoong, who was at the door-?”

You turn your head and see Seonghwa and the rest of the boys shocked to see you.

“Y/N…” Seonghwa says in disbelief

“Hi” you say smiling. All the boys hesitate to move towards you. So Hongjoong grabs your hand brings you to the couch.

“San, go grab her a spare pair of clothes. She’s drenched from the rain” Hongjoong says quietly to him. San nods and heads upstairs to his room. The boys sit around you in silence. You fiddle your fingers. You came here to tell them you want to be with them, but your voice won’t speak.

“Y/N, go change. Then we can talk.” Hongjoong says as San holds out a fresh pair of folded clothes in front of you. You hesitantly grab the clothes as San shows you the way to the bathroom. You change into a pair of black sweat shorts and an ATZ embroidered frat sweater. You take a deep breath and exhale trying to calm yourself. You make your way back to the living room. You stand before them once again. They all look at you in awe.

“I… I’m sorry I came here so suddenly especially at this time of night. I know it’s late… But I just… I just wanted to say that I’m ready to try this out.” You stare at them, suddenly the desperation you had makes you feel embarrassed.

“I… I want to be with all of you.” You say once again.

“Y/N… are you sure about this?” Seonghwa speaks up. You nod instantly and the boys smile at you. Hongjoong moves from leaning on the wall and makes his way towards you. He sits you on the single couch and pats your head.

“Miss Y/N… we promise to take good care of you” Hongjoong softly smiles at you.

“Do you have anything else for us? Any questions or comments before starting this relationship? We know this is still new water to you.” Jongho speaks up.

“I want to know why me. Why did you all collectively choose me?” You sit up straight

“Well, we are all fond of you Y/N. You’re beautiful, smart, and kind. That’s something we can all agree on. Of course we each have our own stories on how we developed a crush on you. Which is not mine to tell, but I believe we should tell you on our own time with you”. Hongjoong says. You nod in agreement and speak again

“Since this is new to me… if at any point I’m not doing something right, just guide me a little and don’t hesitate to tell me. Also, you guys need to give me time to warm up to this. I know we have been mutuals for awhile but we barely know each other. So, let’s take things slow” You say softly.

“Of course, and we ask the same Y/N. Don’t hesitate to tell or ask us anything” Yunho states. You nod and give them a soft smile.

“So… I’m ATZ’s girlfriend?” you say in a teasing tone. The boys chuckle at your light heartedness and hum in response,

“Yes, ATZ is your boyfriend” Mingi says with his charming smile. You blush and remember another question you had.

“Oh, I was also meaning to ask… Will anyone know about our relationship?” You look at the boys in curiosity.

“Well, typically no. We know it may be hard to hide a relationship with 8 people. So, to everyone else you’ll be ATZ’s Sweetheart. But to us you’ll be our girlfriend.“ Seonghwa responds.

“When the day comes that you’re ready to reveal this relationship public we will be ready too, Y/N” Hongjoong says.

“Okay” You say with a smile and stand up.

“I should head home then… It’s late and I’m sorry again for barging in so late” You say with an awkward smile.

“Y/N, just stay the night. We have a spare room. It’s late and still raining.” Yeosang insists as he stands up and walk towards you. He grabs your hand to make you stay.

“Yeah just stay Y/N! we were about to watch a movie!” Wooyoung exclaims. You hesitate to stay but the boys pull you to the couch. Next thing you know, the night proceeds as an action movie plays on the large screen. The boys are scattered along the living room couches and floor. You are sat between Yunho and Yeosang. The coffee table in front of you is covered with snacks and drinks. The dark atmosphere of the house is illuminated by the television screen. Something about this is so relaxing that you begin to feel your eyes get heavy. You let your head fall onto Yeosang’s shoulder and he chuckles,

“You tired?” Yeosang whispers. You shake your head in protest and try to keep your eyes awake and fixated on the screen. Moments go by and you can’t remember when you fell asleep. Some of the boys have already made their ways to their rooms and the bathroom to freshen up. You remain asleep on Yeosang’s shoulder until San approaches you two.

“I can take her to the room” San whispers to Yeosang in which he nods in response. San carefully lifts you in his arms trying not to wake you up, thankfully you are in a deep slumber. His arms are supporting your back and legs as your head naturally falls onto his chest. Yeosang stretches up and bids San a goodnight before walking off to his room.

San makes his way to the spare room and gently lays you on top of the bed. He pulls the blanket over your body and sits at the edge of the bed next to you. He admires your peaceful face as you sleep soundly. His hand strokes your hair and kisses your forehead.

“i’m sorry it took me this long Y/N” San whispers quietly. He knows you can’t hear him. Which is exactly why he decides to confess this now. He wants to tell you why. But not just yet.

——

If someone were to ask you why you agreed to be in a relationship with ATZ. You wouldn’t know what to say, other than that you cared for all of them. The last serious relationship you’ve ever had was 4 years ago. You wanted to walked into university with no distractions. With a balance of academics and meeting new people with no attachments, you were satisfied with your decision of being independent. So it being your last year in university, what could go wrong? As Jia said before, you are top of the graduating class and are already on track with an internship for a project management company that has been hinting a set job position for you once you graduate. You feel that most people would shame you and say it would be an inconvenience trying to date 8 men at the same time. but you beg to differ. Thought no one may say anything to you anytime soon, their opinions didn’t matter.

——

Two days have gone by since you’ve seen the boys on that rainy night. You’re currently sitting in the University library typing a research paper for a class. You’re playing soft lo-fi music in your earphones for a complete study atmosphere, until you’re interrupted with a tug at your wires. You look up and see none other than Hongjoong smiling at you. You smile back at him.

“Hey there Pretty.” Hongjoong takes a seat next to you.

“Hi Hongjoong” you scoot to give him some room. He pulls out can of instant coffee from a vending machine near by and opens it for you.

“oh, thank you” you take the can and sip on it.

“What are you up to?” He asks casually. You feel a sudden nervousness as this is your first time in public with him as your boyfriend. You’ve rarely talked to Hongjoong throughout your time here in university. So it was something you’d definitely needed to get used to.

“Just writing a research paper for a class. I’m almost done” You say as you advert your attention back to your laptop. Hongjoong peers over your shoulder and watches your screen. His face is dangerously close to yours, that you can hear his soft breathing next to your ear. He hums while nodding his head as he pulls back to lean into his seat.

“When you’re done let’s go get lunch.” Hongjoong takes one of your pens and begins spinning it between his fingers. You look at him with a straight face,

“Sure” you say casually. Hongjoong smirks at your nonchalant expression and stretches his arms.

“Well since you’re still working I might as well finish my assignments too.” Hongjoong takes out his laptop and some overhead headphones. You watch him set up his items and pull up what looks like a demo sound track on his screen. He’s already in a working mode as he moves and clicks his laptop. You turn your attention back to your laptop continue your work. The atmosphere is comfortable between you two. You quickly learn that Hongjoong is a diligent worker and doesn’t like to slack off. Within the hour of you two sitting in the quiet library together, he would occasionally turn to you for advice on his sound track as well as make small talk conversations.

“You getting hungry?” Hongjoong whispers.

“Hmm Yeah I am. I’m craving some ramen and spicy rice cakes.” you say as you stretch your arms.

“Okay let’s go” Hongjoong begins to pack his things and you follow.

Hongjoong takes you to a near by ramen booth by the university and orders for you both. As you two wait for your food you can’t help but ask some lingering questions you’ve had since you left the frat house.

“Hongjoong, you mentioned to me that you and the rest of ATZ had developed your crushes on me for separate reasons.” You begin. Hongjoong hums in response and remains eye contact with you.

“What was your reason? We’ve never really spoken to each other before. So why so suddenly?” You ask.

“To be honest. I don’t know when it started. As much as I may seem confident as the leader of ATZ, I am pretty reserved. But I often saw you at school events and parties and grew a fond of you. I guess, from there you always just stayed in my mind. became someone I appreciated being around. You always have a positive aura and I find it very attractive. Not to mention you’re very hot” He winks at you, and you blush.

“How did… You guys agree to choose me? How did the conversation even come up?” You hesitate to ask. But you’re genuinely curious.

“Hmm… The boys and I grew a strong bond together the moment we first met and created ATZ. The first poly relationship we had was a new stepping stone in our friendship. We all had a crush on the same person but with our loyalty towards each other, we ended up compromising by trying out polyamorous relationships. It worked out at first. but the girl got too obsessed with San more than the others. So naturally we let her go. Ever since then we haven’t pursued any other poly relationships. That is until… we met you. We naturally talk about our crushes to each other once in awhile and one day found out we all liked the same person, which was you. So it took awhile to talk agree on trying out another poly relationship. but next thing led to another, and here we are.” Hongjoong explains.

You nod and start to think about San. Their previous partner was too obsessed with San and began to forget about the other members..? You appreciated Hongjoong being open about their relationship dynamics. Many people would find this controversial, and somehow it encourages you to be the best person for all of them.

“Here is your food! Please enjoy~” The server plates the meal in front of you and Hongjoong and excuses herself. You both feast on your meals and continue to talk about each other. You smile to yourself as you enjoy this date, Hongjoong is a talker and listener, making you feel very comfortable about not being afraid to open up to him more. After Hongjoong pays the bill, you both make your way back to the university.

“Is your schedule done for today?” Hongjoong looks at you while walking side by your side. You hum in response.

“Yeah, I was done before I went to the library. I’m actually going to head home.” You say keeping your eyes forward.

“Before you go home, let me take you to the ATZ house” Hongjoong says as he stops infront of you, causing you to stop in your tracks.

“Why?” you question

“All the boys are shitting on me for taking you out without them knowing” Hongjoong laughs. You can’t help but chuckle at the ridiculous statement.

“They just want to see you. that’s all. Please?” Hongjoong grabs your hands and rubs them softly.

“Okay” you say to him.

“Perfect, let’s go” Hongjoong smiles.

——

Arriving at the ATZ house, you see Jongho and Yunho distracted on a game console while Mingi and Yeosang watch.

“Hi everyone” You say as you wave. The boys quickly turn their heads to your honey voice and smile instantly.

“There’s our girl!” Mingi exclaims as he walks towards you and pulls you into a tight hug. You blush at the sudden skinship and hug him back. You see Wooyoung and Seonghwa run out of the kitchen in their aprons and walk towards you with a smile

“Hi Y/N” Seonghwa smiles at you.

“Yah! Hongjoong why did you secretly take her out!” Wooyoung points a finger at the leader and he chuckles.

“We ran into each other at the library! the date just happened on its own, Woo” you defend Hongjoong as you begin to take off your shoes and make your way to the couch.

“Oh okay then!” Wooyoung says as he skips back to the kitchen. You and Hongjoong look at each other and laugh at Wooyoung’s sudden switch up.

You sit down next to Yeosang and he slings an arm over your shoulders.

“How was your day Darling?” Yeosang asks looking at you.

“It was good. I had a lot of fun” You say as you smile at him.

“Where’s San?” you ask the rest of the boys.

“He’s upstairs taking a nap” Jongho replies, eyes still glued onto his game.

“I’m… going to go say hi to him” You hesitantly say as you get up from your seat and make your way to the staircase.

“oh. uh which is his room?” you turn back at laugh in embarrassment.

“Third room to the left” Yeosang replies with a smile.

You nod and walk upstairs. Your mind tries to tell you to stop your intrusive thoughts about greeting San alone in his room but your feet won’t stop moving. You arrive at his door and gently knock three times.

“Come in.” You hear him say.

You slowly twist the door knob and open it. You see San’s back faced towards you. It looks like he was just changing into his shirt that is now nicely clinging onto his toned body. You blush and try to get yourself together. Before you can say anything he turns around a gives you a surprised look.

“Oh Y/N. I didn’t know it was you.” He says casually.

“Sorry, I just got here. I just wanted to say Hi. I didn’t see you downstairs” You say as you instinctively shut the door behind you. He smirks and walks closer towards you, causing you to move backwards and into the wall. You’re now trapped between him and the door. His face is close to yours as he leans down to be eye level with you.

“You’re blocking the door Darling”. He teases. Your eyes widen in realization and you blush trying to move away. San opens the door and walks out.

“Are you coming or are you going to stay in my room?” San asks as he turns around to look at you.

“oh-“ you follow behind him as you both make your way downstairs. You mentally punch yourself at the interaction you just had with San. The signals he’s sending you are all out of wack. The boys are saying one thing about San but his actions and attitude towards you are saying another. Regardless, you make your way back to the couch. All the boys are now present, munching on snacks that Wooyoung and Seonghwa made. Trying to find a spot on the leather cushion, you hesitate to move your legs.

“Come sit here Y/N” Mingi ushers you over and you sit close to him slightly on his lap.

“Don’t be shy” Mingi teases as he holds your waist to maneuver you comfortably on his lap. You release a yelp.

“Mingi! she said take things slow!” Wooyoung shouts. You blush and hide your face in your palms. The boys are giggling at your cute gesture.

“It’s fine” You say as you try to hide your smile. You shift to get comfortable and mentally pull yourself together.

Mingi’s hand rests on your thigh lightly tapping to the beat of the song playing in the background. One of your arms is slung over his neck as your other hand scrolls through your phone, trying to find something to do. You don’t know how to function, Mingi is so direct, so out of curiosity you decide to get the question out of the way.

“Mingi” you quietly call his name. The boys around you are too distracted with their own things and the music blasting is too loud to hear you.

“Hmm?” He leans his ear in closer to your mouth as you begin to speak

“I’m curious…” you begin

“Of what?” He replies

“When did you start liking me?” You ask as your hand starts playing with his hair. You both are ridiculously close to each other as he begins to speak,

“You want me to be honest?” He asks with a cocky smile.

“Yes I do” you raise an eye brow at him. He leans into your ear and whispers,

“I started liking you the day you and your friends came to cheer on ATZ at the pie fundraiser. You in that cute cheerleading outfit is still engraved in my mind till this day” He chuckles. You gasp and blush as you playfully hit his shoulder. He laughs out loud and hold onto his arm.

“What! you said be honest” Mingi exclaims. All the boys attention are now on both of you.

“Oh my god Mingi did you tell her?” Yunho asks. Mingi ignores Yunho’s question knowing his friend already knows the answer.

“Mingi that pie fundraiser was 2 year ago! how do you still remember that!” You say as you get up from his lap.

“Why are you leaving!” Mingi whines as he can’t control his laughter.

“Y/N, we all still remember that pie fundraiser. It’s probably the one of the best memories we have” Hongjoong laughs. Your face is now so red.

“What do you guys mean by that” you stand in front of them and cross your arms.

“We mean that pie fundraiser was one of the most successful events we’ve had! You and your friends cheerleading team really helped us. and as a bonus we got to spend the whole day with you” Yeosang laughs.

“I.. didn’t even know you guys noticed me that long ago” You say. The boys smile softly at your shyness and encourage you to come sit back down with them.

“We’ve noticed you longer than you’ll ever know Darling” Seonghwa says.

The night continues with laughter and constant questions and comments about you. The boys are very attentive. Making sure you’re comfortable and well fed. You look towards your phone and notice it’s getting late.

“I should head back home.” You say as you get up from the couch.

“I’ll walk you home.” You turn your head to see San standing up with you.

“Okay” you say calmly.

You bid goodbyes to everyone as they pass you around to hug you.

San waits for you by the door as you put your shoes on and walk out with him.

——

The walk back to your apartment seems longer than usual. It’s only a 10 minute walk from the campus, but with San by your side, the quiet awkwardness makes it feel like an eternity.

“San?” You break the silence

“Yes?” he replies, eyes still facing forward.

“Thank you for walking me home.” You say. He chuckles.

“Is that it?” He asks as he looks down at you. You nod. Slightly confused at his response. San’s eyes turn back to look at the concrete in front of him. And the walk remains quiet.

Finally arriving to the front of the apartment building you turn to San and thank him once again.

“Let me walk you to your door.” He insists.

“you don’t have to-“

San cuts you off as he opens the lobby doors. You sigh and follow behind him inside. You both enter the elevator and lean your back against the wall bar. San reciprocates the action next to you.

“San…” you speak up and he turns to face you in response.

“I don’t want you to force yourself to act like you like me for the sake of your friends wanting this type of relationship” You say in true honesty. You try to keep your voice calm and confident.

“What are you talking about?” San says in a nonchalant tone.

“Well It just doesn’t make sense to me that you agreed to this…” You say as you look at the ground. (why is this elevator moving so slow, you mentally say to yourself).

“And what makes you think that Y/N” San asks. You can still feel his piercing gaze on you.

“because you hate me San. so it doesn’t make sense that-”

Suddenly, San cuts you off and traps you against the wall. His hands rest on the bars behind your hips. He leans his face close to yours and stares into your eyes.

“don’t you hate me too Y/N? why did you agree to this if you hate me?” San asks in a teasing tone. You gulp and feel your cheeks heat up. You don’t know what to say. You just stand there under his body like a trapped prey.

“Answer me Y/N” San says in soft yet deep tone.

“I asked you first” You don’t know why you’re biting back. He scoffs as he looks down.

“It’s quite the opposite for me Darling.” San releases his grip from the metal bars and moves away as the elevator door rings open. You quickly walk out of the elevator and make your way to your door. San follows you from behind with his hands in his pockets.

“O-okay well this is me. Thank you again for taking me home. I’ll see you soon” You say as you scramble to take out your keys and unlock the door. You don’t look at him. Before you can walk into your apartment, San grabs your wrist and turns you towards him. Your eyes widen.

“Do you hate me Y/N?” San asks again.

“No…” you say quietly.

“Do you like me?” San’s eyes look into yours then drops down to your soft lips.

You nod in response. It feels like he’s leaning in closer to your face. Your eyes naturally close. Waiting for him to close the small gap between you two. San smirks at your gesture and scoffs lightly.

*thwack* San softly flicks your forehead and pulls away from you. You widen your eyes and blush in embarrassment.

“Goodnight Y/N”. San pushes you into your apartment and closes the door shut. You stand by your front door shocked and dumbfounded.

(What the fuck was that?) you quietly curse under your breath.

end of chapter 2…

next chapter>>>

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author’s comment: thank you all so much for the support of this series! more is to come soon! please don’t hesitate to leave comments or questions in my ask box or comment section!

comment or message me to be apart of the current tag list! 🪼

————————————————————————

tag list: @georgeanabanana @jaytheatiny @mxnsxngie @spenceatiny18 @sanhwalvr @highkeyinlovewithhanjisung @joongscheese @therealcuppicake @velvetskize @hwxbibi

#ateez fanfic #ateez imagines #ateez smut #ateez x reader #yeosang smut #ateez fanfiction #ateez writing #hongjoong smut #jongho smut #mingi smut #yunho smut #seonghwa smut #san smut #wooyoung smut #yeostinywrites #mydeardarlingatz

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hcneymooners · 10 days ago

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the odd soft launch of homophobia is starting to truly irk me.

there’s been a lot of conversation lately about paige and azzi and the nature of their relationship, and to be honest, it feels so clear to me that what they have goes beyond friendship. there’s something about their connection that feels deep, unspoken—like they’re soul-tied. but amid the speculation, i've also seen people call out the "deniers," saying things like, “at this point, y’all are just being homophobic.” and while i’ve hesitated to say anything, i do think this conversation is worth having—because, honestly, yes.

yes, a lot of the reactions to it are rooted in something deeper and more uncomfortable.

for a long time now, i’ve seen people deny anything could possibly be going on between the two of them. they say it’s to protect the girls or to respect their privacy—but under that, i think there’s a fear. a fear of what it would mean if they were together. because then they’d be “those” people. part of a group that still gets othered, questioned, and in many cases, rejected. and when you factor in paige’s strong christian faith—which has drawn in a lot of religious, often conservative fans—it gets even more complicated.

i think it’s easy to believe we live in a progressive world when you’ve tailored both your real life and your algorithm to reflect that, but the truth is that culture has shifted heavily to conservatism. people are bolder now in the ways they talk about marginalized people, even if they’re trying to dress it up as concern. i saw someone comment on a video calling paige a “real woman”—and it just reinforced this feeling i’ve had.

there’s this uncomfortable desire to fit them into a narrow, safe idea of womanhood and straightness. and to be even more honest, for a lot of people, it’s about wanting paige—blonde, blue-eyed, that “all-american” look—to not be with a mixed, black woman like azzi. no one says it out loud, but the silence is loud enough.

i think a lot about how society still doesn’t take relationships between women seriously. we see it over and over again—sapphic relationships being dismissed as “just a phase” or romantic friendships. there’s a safety in calling someone your best friend, especially when the world isn’t safe enough to call them your partner. and people eat that narrative up because it lets them ignore what’s right in front of them. and i see that happening constantly with paige and azzi. it’s almost like people need to believe it’s not real, just so they can stay comfortable.

at the end of the day, they’re free to conduct their relationship however they want—it’s theirs. they don’t owe us anything. but i do think some of you need to partake in some serious self-reflection: why does the idea of them being together make you uncomfortable? is it really about protecting them? or is it about protecting your idea of them? how much of your reaction is shaped by internalized homophobia or racial bias?

and i say this gently, but also truthfully: some of y’all are projecting strange fantasies onto these girls, especially paige. there’s a level of obsession, of placing her on this untouchable pedestal, that honestly starts to feel more about possession than admiration.

it’s worth questioning what’s really going on there because it’s uncomfortable to witness.

#paige bueckers #azzi fudd #pazzi #paige x azzi #wnba basketball #wnba draft #uconn wbb #uconn huskies #like seriously pack it tf up #mine ; 🐎.#i hate when people try to bs their way through the obvious “ism” or “phobia” you have.#and everyone is like “well it kinda feels like...” baby #it is.#this ended up being so long whoops

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gogo-gogurtman · 7 months ago

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Oh, Darling of Mine!

Do you want to know what’s it like to have the Subway Masters crush on you? How they’d act when they catch a glimpse of you in the crowd? It was about time Cupid’s arrow struck these workaholic train men!

👉 Contains: SFW fluff, separate headcanons, Ingo x Reader, Emmet x Reader

🌙 I just wanted to write about how giddy the Subway Masters get every time they see their sweetie heart :)

🖤 ▵ 🔲 𝓘𝓷𝓰𝓸 🔲 ▵ 🖤

When love hits Ingo, it takes him a while to realize that these feelings aren’t purely platonic.

It’s either because he’s oblivious or inexperienced with romance.

Doesn’t matter though, because when he first starts to feel that pull towards you, he just knows that he always wants to be near you.

Ingo wants to be your friend so bad! But he didn’t know how to ask without it sounding like a business proposal.

Emmet had to ask for him and initiate the friendship. He was so forward with it, too. Ingo nearly pulled the breaks on the conversation because he was so red and flustered over how his brother put him in the spotlight like that.

Ingo thinks you’re cool. Your job? Interesting. Your stories? Pleasant to hear. Your Pokémon? Absolutely stunning and asks if you want to have a group play date.

Despite this all, he still manages to keep that frowny face. It’s kinda uncanny with him speaking nothing but goodness over you while wearing that frown but it’s charming.

Especially in the moments where his eyes softens and the ends of his lips curls upwards. Aren’t you lucky? His cat-like smile was only reserved for his family and close friends.

Every time he catches a glimpse of a color you frequently wear, his head immediately snaps up to see if it was you in the crowd.

His frown somehow deepens when it’s not you.

Ingo is such a gentleman! The type of guy to give you his coat on chilly days, open any doors for you and pull out chairs, keeping you close to him as he navigates through busy areas….

Basically, I’m a believer that’s he’s an old fashioned guy. An odd, old fashioned guy (and we love that <3)

Great man with great life advice. He’s got you when you need them (not for romantic advice lmao)

But like his speech, his advice includes heavy train analogy 🚂

If you’re sensitive to loud noises, he’ll make the effort to lower his voice around you.

Doesn’t realize that half the things he’s done for you can be considered romantic.

He really hopes that you will challenge the battle lines! If you make it to his cart, he would shower you and your team with loud praises and show you his best self when battling.

Ingo would even research your preferred Pokémon typing and interests. He’ll even give you advice of some strategies and be an active listener when you talk about your likes.

He would start to offer you potions and berries.

For a while, he puts up this friendly and professional front. He doesn’t want you to think less of him if you see his mask slip.

Like many, I headcanon him as the older twin, so he does harbor insecurities such as bottling his emotions to appear more “reliable” and feeling like it’s expected of him to make sacrifices for everyone.

If you offer him your shoulder to cry on and give him promises of being there for him, he would feel so relieved. It would touch him to know that you don’t mind him without his mask.

Mans so stiff. But he would like to slow dance with you.

He gets caught up in that daydream every time he catches the speakers playing classical or love songs at the station.

Keeps mental tabs on your favorites. Window shopping for Ingo will never be the same (He once stood outside of a display for twenty minutes debating whether or not he should get you an item he’d think you’d like.)

You’re just his favorite person (that isn’t his brother or Elesa)

As his feelings for you grow, he will call you by your name less and start picking up nicknames like “Dear” and “Dearest”. He did, on one occasion before confessing, let a “sweetheart” slip out. When you caught that, Ingo was not looking at you as he was busy hiding his red face behind his hat.

The day Ingo realized that friends shouldn’t be this affectionate and that he liked you, it hit him like a train.

Though, he accepted it quick, and changed tracks so he can see if there was a chance that you’d feel the same.

But by that point, his love for you grows to be too much. His heart yearns for yours, his soul aching to merge the tracks of life with yours.

With a pleasant restaurant marked down for later and his brother giving him a supportive slap on the back, Ingo faces you and in his own, loud, conductor-esque way, tells you how much he loves you. Do you feel the same?

🤍 ▿ 🔳 𝓔𝓶𝓶𝓮𝓽 🔳 ▿ 🤍

Love? Ha. No.

He acknowledges that you’re attractive. He acknowledges that he may harbor a crush on you.

But the minute Emmet feels his crush solidifying into an infatuation, he’s at war. He’s in denial about that.

Emmet loves to see your face, especially your smile with matching bright eyes.

He tries extra hard to be the main reason for your smile.

If you battle, most likely every time he sees you he’ll demand a battle. Get those handy dandy potions ready because he is still not going easy on you.

If anything, Emmet goes all out on your battles. An excuse to show off his skills and Pokémon. But if you lose, he doesn’t get in your face about it. He would praise both you and your Pokémon’s efforts and share some battling advice. He would also offer you potions and berries.

A favorite of his is spending time with you talking about strategies and both of your Pokémon teams. Think of all the combinations! Emmet would still enjoy it if you just listened to him as well.

Emmet also likes listening to you too! Your rambles are verrrry interesting!

Definitely look into your interests in his free time. He wants to be the best conversation person!

Also, gossip bestie. He likes a good gossip session 💅

Somehow, he always manages to spook you when he suddenly appears at your side. For someone with long strides, he’s pretty quiet.

It’s just that every time he spots you in the crowd, he immediately b-lines towards you. One time, it took Ingo ten minutes to realize that Emmet wasn’t walking with him anymore and had stop to talk with you.

Has a tendency to drag you around when he’s excited. Doesn’t realize it until you say something and completely do a 180. AKA, he completely removes himself from you and pretends that nothing happened.

Mans got a bad case of cuteness aggression. Why??? Are??? You??? so??? CUTE????

Replays your conversations in his head all day. Files any important details away in his mind for safe keeping. Emmet also tends to daydream about future conversations and how to wow you.

On that topic, also daydreams about successfully sweeping you off your feet.

He would like very much to go on different outings with you. It also just be a simple walk and it’s be enough for him.

When he gets offered sweets, instead of saving them for his brother, he would now offer them to you if you’d enjoy confectioneries (Ingo cannot know about this betrayal)

His signature smile does get a bit wobbly and rosey when he interacts with you.

Emmet also teases you. It can be by flirting or playful jabs. He likes to see all the expressions he can pull from you.

He’s very physically affectionate. Squishing your cheeks, full on hugs that squeezes the air out of your lungs, doing that hold holding thing where he swings your intertwined hands to match his strides.

Emmet would also respect it if you didn’t want to be touched. Last thing he wants to do is to make you uncomfortable.

You need an opinion? Emmet is as blunt and honest as an old woman. He will say that outfit does not look right and save you from a wardrobe malfunction. But he will tell you when something looks great.

His compliments are straightforward, you may end up with a red face.

His brutal honesty is also good for snapping you out of delulu land. He really doesn’t intend on making you feel bad, he just wants to help.

He doesn’t tell anyone, but when his feelings grow genuine, he has self-deprecating thoughts over how this friendship is an elaborate cruel prank of yours.

You can’t possibly enjoy his presence that much. Doesn’t he get annoying? Doesn’t he get too rude or too pushy with battles? Doesn’t his train talk get tiring?

Emmet thinks of himself as the weirder one of the twins. There’s not a lot of people approaching them with a genuine friendship, much less with him.

As the younger brother, he tends to downplay his misfortune and shut himself out when he’s going through something. He doesn’t want to add on any more burdens to Ingo.

But with you, you make him feel safe to act like himself. You make sure to let him know that he doesn’t need to cut out parts of himself to make you enjoy his company.

After hearing that, he decided that he can’t have you disappear from his life. You’re verrry important to him, now.

The Joltiks, man. You will find some stowaways on you, either by their own choosing or Emmet planting them on you.

Gets more starry eyed if you baby them like he would. The Joltiks are a testament to see if you’re a Real One.

Affectionately would call you “Dear”, “Darling”, or when you two are dating, “Baby”.

Emmet likes upbeat music. When he hears it, he feels like dancing. He imagines dancing with you and swinging you around and around.

Your giggles would be music to his ears. Don’t be shy now, he wants to hear how happy you are with him.

At some point, he comes to terms with the fact that he’s fallen in love with you. You, his friend that doesn’t shame him for being himself and being his rock.

There was no planning, no prolonging when he realizes this. Because when the two of you are enjoying a moment together, Emmet holds you close and tells you he loves you.

His pretty darrrling, would you like to be his?

#gogurtman is thinking #ingo x reader #emmet x reader #submas x reader #pokemon x reader #subway boss ingo #subway master ingo #subway boss emmet #subway master emmet #headcanon #fluff

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zzencat · 10 months ago

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Your Person When They Realize They Want More With You (+ character traits) - Timeless ⏳

From left to right. Choose the one you can’t take your eyes off of.

Applicable to a current or future person. This is someone that wants to be someone more to you. Warnings: tooth-rottingly sweet. Some suggestiveness. Some angst.

BEFORE YOU CHOOSE. Clear your mind. Time is now patient and still. Close your eyes, inhale deeply, fill your chest up to the fullest, feel the soft air brush up against the ridges of your nose. Breathe out. You may now begin.

———————————

Pile 1. “If we’re both still single by 30, let’s get married.” “Deal.”

•you could be coworkers OR someone who goes in the same direction as you in the morning

• one day, a thought will cross their mind when they’re ordering your favorite so-and-so, maybe coffee, maybe favorite pastry, OR they randomly keep remember weird details about you(?) like “oh y/n likes this…”—cuz they’ll be like “wait…why do I know that? lol why did I just randomly rmr that…” they’ll laugh it off,,,,and then they see you again later and their heart beats a different way…

• they honestly did not see you like this before…

• ear muffs and black sweaters…puffy jackets…perhaps it’s cold/snowing when it hits them how radiant you look

•honestly a very sweet fs. if you’re okay with vanilla people, this is def for you. if not, let’s spice it upppp (you gotta do it)

• it’s weird bc it hits them gradually too. like thinking “why are you still single…why am i still single?”

• you guys have a mature vibe. ^^(relating to previous point) a lot of this pile’s fs will realize their feelings too late or will realize when you’re both financially stable

• maybe you give the vibe you’re not interested in them or you don’t have the intention of getting married—at some point you may have mentioned this to them, sober or drunk, and they rmr it so their being cautious and gauging how you could feel about them, if you feel anything for them at all

• childhood friend kind of energy. I really don’t think you see them in this way either, not until they start acting weird around you. All of sudden, they’re not smiling as much anymore and maybe they’re averting their gaze more

• it sucks bc you’ll question why and will feel weirded out when they start avoiding you, turning down your requests to hang out…

• I’m getting a very empty feel. Either you feel empty without them or they’ve been on dates with other people in the past (you’re wondering how tf they still haven’t settled) and it’s bc they’re not feeling that “unidentifiable”…spark. Like the one they should be feeling on dates with new people, but no…it’s just…dry. They don’t know what it is tho. All of these people are attractive and share the same interests, yet there’s just something missing…

• if you give this a try, you will fall very fuckin hard

• ^^ having thoughts like “how tf do they know how to cook? were they always this hot?” lawd…noticing the small things about them and it’ll get you blushin

• honestly…there’s gonna be a huge difference in communication. you’ll probably be a bit pissed- like “why are you acting so weird? have you been avoiding me?”

• they’d give you all these excuses of why they can’t hang out, and that’s bc they wanna be a lone with their feelings. They’ll try to suppress it at first because there’s just no sign that you like them back, no indication of you even feeling anything romantic towards them, and it kills them…

• I honestly see this person suffering alone from it. They’ve got all this worry and bad energy and it’s not even your fault, so the energy is just going inwards. They can’t express it- they don’t even want to verbally acknowledge it bc they’re THAT sensitive to the fact that they like you and the potential of you not liking them back. It’s really just their own mind and doubts being the bad guy

• why is this happening in a car? 😳 you might have to conjure up a little ruse to get them in one place bc they are definitely avoiding you

• I’m really getting the feeling that you were oblivious. Like it had NOT occurred to you once that they could’ve had feelings for you. The most you would’ve thought of your relationship with them is a friendship

• ^^ bc ngl a prominent portion of this group think the fs is too good for them, like out of their league—both in physical and status

• they could be tall and wear glasses, or fit and good facial bone structure

• if you mention another person (that you could possibly interested in) they’ll purse their lips and play up that they’re happy for you (but trust me, it’s fake as hell and you’ll see it). Like they won’t even be able to hold a real smile bc they’re already hurt by the possibilities. OR they just go quiet and say “oh, really?” *looks down, hands in pockets* if you’re both standing up. If you’re one of the oblivious bunch, you’ll notice their tone change but you won’t understand what’s wrong. (there’s also a split amount of you that would ask what’s wrong and others that won’t)

• BUUUT there’s also a handful of fs in this pile that will look down at their feet, hands in pockets, maybe even wearing a beanie, and will avoid your eyes while passive aggressive shooting down the other person. For example, if you compliment this other person, they’ll quietly be like “well, they’re not THAT good…”

• if you’re not giving any signs STILL? then this person will try to suppress their feelings even more and will start going on dates again. this person isn’t the most optimistic when it comes to this—which I can’t blame them for bc I think you treat them TOO much like a friend or family and joke around too casually with them that they think it’s permanently stuck like that—EVEN THO you haven’t even rejected them. there’s also a chance you’d never even friendzoned them. Perhaps when you two were younger, you were like “ewww 🤮🤮🤮” to the prospect, but now that things are different, you’re not totally opposed to it…maybe it’s crossed your mind once or twice, but you didn’t think much of it really…

•hella puppy vibes from this person tho. either they look the part or act it

•I feel kind of sad for your fs only bc some of you could friendzone them or at least have given off that vibe to them. you would go out to events with this person, even 1-on-1 and not even think of it romantically while your person is feeling this one-sided love

• it’s up to you guys if you want to date this person or not, but if you do, they will literally do EVERYTHING for you- esp the planning

• very strong cold weather, scarves, hot drinks, cold region

•this person tries to invite you out often

• i will also mention, this pile is more likely to date this person than pile 3 is to date theirs

• if you do end up dating, in the beginning stage of this relationship, they’re just shy as hellllll and you’re like “what? 😃” when you catch them staring at you — in the beginning stage, they’re prone to laughing/giggling a lot when yall make eye contact and looking away so you don’t see how flustered they are

• you could be an extrovert OR if not, you just really enjoy being around this person. their personality and presence balances out yours

• you might be unsure of what you want in a romantic partner, open to different cultures/people, kind of in your own world(?) —> like not fixated on one thing or it’s easy for you to get caught up with multiple projects/easily distracted and this person keeps track of you/keeps you grounded

• if you figure out that they have feelings for you, you’ll start to feel bad for not seeing it earlier, you’ll start to hella ruminate about it and the more you think abt them, the cuter and more appealing they seem to you

Points of Interest: infj? overthinker for sure, introvert but still good with people, the color gold, “we’re just hanging out,” going to dinner often, getting mistaken for a couple, 7:43 pm, *shrugs* “idk maybe” (from your side), unwarranted sass (from both sides), no hookups—this person wants a genuine relationship with you, “you have shit taste in love interests”(lmfao???), car fights, “wifey” *takes Snapchat selfie while sitting in the passenger seat with the more feminine energy driving*(…nah listen, if the more masc energy be saying this? dude is immediately submissive), curly hair or FLUFFY hair, lots of thick hair, you make this person feel like a kid…like you bring them back to when they didn’t have to worry about jobs and taxes, financial stability, maturity, miscommunication, amusement park dates, trench coats, “I’m feeling kind sick. Sorry 😞”, excuses, excuses, excuses, “why haven’t you been answering my texts?”, catching them try to shamelessly avoid you at the parking at their workplace, going to movies with this person and them treating it like a date (even when you don’t see it that way), when will they make an actual move??

——————

Pile 2. “What are you looking at?”

• yooo have you been to this person’s house before? 😳👀

•idk if you realize this pile 2, but if it was just the two of you, alone, with some dimmed down lights and faint jazz in the background? it could get down and dirty real quick. but only if you’re not sober and not a stubborn person. otherwise, this person isn’t who you’d initially think of as spouse-material

• I’m pretty sure this person has thought abt it before. 200% sure. Not sure if you’ve caught this, but they check you out a lot. They’ve had their eyes on you for a while…

• idk if they’re a huge flirt or just really gives off sensual vibes, but this person is hot…damn

• something about their eyes. They always look so sensual? Or they look really seductive? They’ve got *those* eyes ykwim? They’re also very laidback so that adds to their sexiness

• I think I lot of people wanna sleep with this person, so you’re in an unsaid “competition” — or at least the people around you see it as such. you might get a few dirty looks or sneaky glances your way from jealous people and it’s honestly tiring. you won’t care but it’s just an extra bug on your shoulder

• an issue tho is that you could find this person untrustworthy or not ready for commitment. they’re just hot AND THEY KNOW IT, so if someone asks them for a piece, they’ll easily give themselves — BUT what you don’t know is that a lot of the fs, NOT ALL, in this pile are very picky with who they want

• if you’re smart, this person could tease you for it. only bc they find it super sexy tho. You’re not exactly friends, just acquaintances/partners in business? People who know of each other because of mutual things or people. They know you secretly want them tho even if you try to keep composure

• I’m sure a lot of this pile thinks this person is conceited as hell or you could even cringe at how they are, and you wouldn’t admit in front of them (not even to yourself) that you do find them attractive

• if you’re stubborn, possess a lot of self control, or perhaps hold yourself and others to a standard, maybe it’s just hard for people to get into your pants in general—but this person will like that. they think you have substance to you and you’re not like the rest

• This person likely has a bunch of yes-men around them. It’s a pretty privilege thing

• pretty mysterious and even prettier eyes

• smth about those eyes man… you’d blow up if you look too long or steam might start coming outta your ears

• a lotttt smarter than they play out to be

• if you’ve never been with this person sexually, they’d be so down. if you’ve hooked up once, they’d hit you up again

• even tho this person seems noncommittal, once they commit, they REALLY do

• this person might be wealthy or has grown up in an affluent space

• OR they’ve grown up playing sports

•I don’t think they view people as “pawns” necessarily. I think you perceive them as super popular but in reality, they only consider a handful of friends, real friends. this person isn’t dumb and they know who kisses their ass

•your deviance will intrigue them. not conforming to what they want and what the people around them are like. you do what you want and they like that. they like that you also don’t settle for less.

•but I have to say, these people don’t chase. If you end up with this person, it’s bc you grew the balls to ask them out and they, impressed, agreed to it. Outside, they LOOK the same- like carry the same expression on dates, but inside, they know there’s something more to you

• it’s most likely an ego thing. They don’t do the asking out if you’re someone minding your own business

• both of you guys have an ego thing tho. This person beats you by a smidge but you think they get too much credit for just…existing.

• they’re thinking how people usually try to get with them, but bc you haven’t yet, that kind of…tugs their attention a bit. (Their spirit doesn’t want me to make it obvious that they’re lowkey affected by it lmfaoo). It’ll hang in the back of their mind, yes, but it’s not something they think about randomly in the middle of the day

• this person has found or will find success early in life…in their 20s or even before. Some of it may be due to their looks getting them the opportunities, but they haven’t done modeling. At least, not for the sake of modeling. I don’t think it’s an interest of theirs. Heavy on business person tho or someone pursuing a profession in business/finance/economics

• this person’s jaw is nicely shaped. they don’t have too much fat around their jaw

• weirdly, they can be smart for their age. I think they feel a bit of pressure from being praised for so long for looking so good that they have to perform at that same level

• there will be chances for you to actually speak to them regularly, but they will seldom make the first move. they want you to pursue so it doesn’t hurt their ego. if they can’t take it anymore, they’ll approach you (preferably at an event or somewhere where youre kind of…disillusioned? stood up, standing alone somewhere feeling insecure abt something…not in the right state of mind/unbalanced mind

•i’m not getting too many extroverts here. high chance a lot of you are introverted and would rather not be at this event. you either pushed yourself to be here or you HAD to be here. the people at this kind of event are not for you…you don’t like a lot of them and some of them feel the same towards you. you don’t care too much tho (maybe a little but not to the point where it hurts your self esteem)

Points of Interest: suits, symmetrical face, blessed features, POSSIBLY MIXED RACE, hazel colored hair, brown or tan skin, hair that compliments skin color, eyes with soul, kinky as hell, realllly good looking, switch in bed, there’s a lot of emphasis on this person’s looks, “don’t try to fight it,” 50 shades of grey (😂?!?), “if you want me, just say so”, any slow Chris Brown song, some fs here has stubble, laidback, single hand in pocket, isn’t scared to make eye contact with you, will leave a conversation with their friend midway to talk to a potential lover/partner in bed interest, zayn malik is not leaving my brain, very slow and sensual vibe, the color black or darker shades, tons of eye fucking (from them to you), intense gaze and especially intense eyes (the staring into your soul type, full of desire and curiosity type), black clothing, mysteriousness, unable to look away, intj vibes

———————

Pile 3. Best friends forever.

• This one feels more sad than the other piles bc it’s just straight up unrequited love (from you). they’ve got the fattest crush going on but you may not feel the same way.

• ^^ damn yeah…i’m getting a mixed bag for this. some of you are open towards it but the other half of you are really not interested

• This person has to have started out as a friend first and then started making subtle, almost too subtle and friendly, gestures that they’re interested in you

• similar to pile 1, you won’t be able to tell that they like you. UNLESS, they get super (very obviously) shy when asking you to go somewhere with them, like a movie or something — and you’ll be able to tell with the stuttering and head scratching and fidgeting, might struggle to make eye contact but will try

• ^^^ The biggest distinction between this pile and pile 1 is that this person is a full on FRIEND. pile 1 is more of friends that fell apart and are reconnecting, while not considered to be a part of your friend group or close friends. in pile 3, there’s an obvious disconnect, like some kind of veil between you two, and it’s really bc they only see you, but to you, this person is a ghost. someone that you really only feel platonic towards.

• they could be soft spoken or has a very… “non-aggressive” voice when speaking to you specifically

• tries to send you funny stuff or make conversation on text — 50/50 answering you right away bc they don’t wanna seem desperate/obvious, but they’ll remember to respond in the same day

• i think they hold back a lot tbh. like they have to sling back to composure whenever you’re around

• stares at you a lot in a group setting

• this person is sooooo similar to pile 1, but more…masochistic? lmfao I mean as in…wanting to be around you even when they know that they don’t have a chance or even after you’d straight up rejected them

• to be honest, there’s a chance you don’t like them that way because of their looks? the personality is perfectly fine but they’re not the type of person you’d go for if you’re looking for someone super attractive (this might be a bit harsh, but maybe a big part of why you’re comfy around them is bc they’re not someone that has model type looks? like it makes you less nervous around them than you would be around someone crazy good looking)

• stalks your social media a lot, doesn’t look at other people. you literally occupy their mind around the clock

• some people here might date this person, only for a little time tho bc there could be someone else you’re interested in, so you end up breaking up. for everyone else, you’re just really unlikely to date this person bc they’re too far from what you consider a romantic partner

• in a monogamous relationship, these are the type of people that would forgive you and welcome you back into their lives if you cheated on them

• an extremely SMALL portion of you, and i mean very small, will actually see this person for who they are and will decide to stay with them. idk if this is out of pity, “oh it’s bc I feel bad for them 🥹”, or possible regret- like “if I don’t date this person, I might regret it”—looking at it like a missed opportunity?? if you genuinely like them and grow fond of them, it will come later and like I said, an extremely small amount of you (~99.9% nonexistent)

• in rejection, this person takes YEARS to get over it. even if they try dating someone else, they’ll think about you and will show care towards you — some will try to be less obvious like “it’s fine i’m over it 🙂‍↔️” but nah, you can feel it. at some point, you could feel annoyed about this

• there’s a small chance that they believe you’ll give them a chance after rejection so they won’t date easily—unless you end up dating someone else and they know abt it, then they’ll do the previous bullet point

Points Of Interest: emotionally masochistic bc they keep wanting to be around you even when they’re hurt (if rejected, this person NEEDS to take some months away from you. idk if they’ll do that right away or not), “nothing else to say”, “that’s okay, I can wait”, awkward, unrequited love, unbreakable loyalty, “aww you’re so sweet”, this person is super rebound energy, gets their heart broken and welcomes the heartbreaker in again, snapback, acne, crooked smile, possible mbti involved (you or them): enfj, enfp, infp, isfj, esfj

———————

Teddy Note: Enjoy this one guys!! As always, thank you for reading. Take what resonates and leave what doesn’t :)

Teddy outtt 😎😎😎

#tarot blog #tarot reading #daily tarot #relationship pac #love pac #divination #pac tarot #tarotblr #intuition #pick a pile #pick a card #love reading #pick a picture #pick a photo #pick an image #tarot masterlist #tarotcommunity #pac reading

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moon-painted · 16 days ago

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my personal experience with 12th house synastry

⟢ i’ve been into astrology for 2 years now, and during this time i’ve noticed astrologers tend to not give much explanation to 12th house synastry. and i totally get why, it’s one of the most confusing houses in both synastry and natal charts, but today i’d like to talk a little bit about my personal experience with this complicated house and how it felt for me

⟢ so, for 6 months, i was in love with this boy who had a stellium in my 12H, and gods, was it the most confusing thing of our lives. he had his sun, mercury AND venus in my 12H house, so let’s dive into this. but before i start, i want to mention that this is my PERSONAL experience and what happened in my case, doesn’t mean will happen in yours too

⟢ also, please take notice that other placements and aspects can 100% influence how your own synastry chart plays out

his sun in my 12H

⟢ i can confirm that what they say about the sun person not seeing the house clearly is very much true. sometimes it seemed like he idealized the idea of me while he wasn’t even sure of his feelings towards me

⟢ it seemed like his mind was in a total fog and he just couldn’t understand what he was feeling for me no matter how much he tried to. and i gave him PLENTY of time and patience to understand his feelings

⟢ as for me, the house person, let me tell you that i had so many dreams with him that it genuinely wore me out because those dreams were so vivid too. like i swear i have never in my life had so many dreams of only one person. and they were so frequent too. there was a time when i was dreaming of him almost every night

⟢ as if the dreams part wasn’t bad enough, i started over romanticizing every thing he was doing towards me and even managed to fool myself that he was SO in love with me, when in reality not even he was sure what he was feeling. the problem is that i didn’t even realize i was doing all of that until a friend pointed it out to me

his mercury in my 12H

⟢ now, i truly feel like this was the only decent placement. i noticed we tended to think very alike, always finish each other’s sentences. sometimes i used to think of something and then he would bring up the same thing in our conversation

⟢ for me, i always felt like he was the only one who could comfort me when it came to some serious personal problems of mine. it felt like somehow he always knew exactly what to say to me to make me feel better

⟢ there were moments when our conversations seemed to never end, but don’t get me wrong, there were moments when we would sit in absolute silence too, just scrolling on our phones. but even that silence felt comfortable

his venus in my 12H

⟢ i feel like this was the placement that made it so difficult for us. i viewed him as the person i want to have a relationship with and portrayed him as my ideal partner

⟢ i was confused when he rejected me, but when we talked i realized he viewed me as someone too good for him, someone he’s scared he’ll hurt if he realizes his real feelings and those feelings are platonic

⟢ in our case, he had a time period when he tried to convince himself his feelings were romantic but he wasn’t able to so, therefore his feelings remained uncertain up to now

⟢ there were other times when i would hang out with him then when he’d left, people would ask me if we’re a couple or not. and when i told them no, they’d tell me that he surely likes me then because they see it in his eyes?? yeah and then he admitted people told him the same thing about me. SO it seems that for this placement everyone from the outside tends to see the connection besides the people who are actually involved in it

⟢ 12H synastry rarely works and it didn’t work in my case either, yeah, but if it didn’t work for me, that doesn’t mean it won’t work for you either. just don’t repeat our mistakes and try to talk openly with the other person, so there is no space left for confusion <3

please don’t copy my work. it’s my personal experience and work and i would like to have that respected, thank you.

#astrology #synastry #synastry chart #12th house #12th house synastry #12h synastry #sun in 12th #venus in 12th house #birth chart #12th house mercury #12th house venus #12th house sun

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sativariddle · 24 days ago

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500 DAYS OF YOU.

꩜ ⋮ wc: 11.4k+

꩜ ⋮ content: sexual content, self sabotaging, angst + POOR decisions. if you don’t enjoy my content, there’s no need for you to stick around, i’m not responsible for what you choose to engage with.

꩜ ⋮ summary: oh, what a love story; a hopeless romantic who believes in grand gestures and forever, falling for a girl who keeps love at arm’s length, never staying long enough to get hurt. if this were a movie, they’d overcome every barrier, meet in the rain for a dramatic kiss, and ride off into the sunset… right?

ㅤ───── ❝ don’t want to be anyone’s girlfriend. ❞

THEODORE LOVES the way your presence makes him feel, even when you’re not there, for example; the scent of coconut on his sheets, like the brush of your fingers tickling over his skin, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind. he is utterly charmed by how your eyes contain an entire forest, all deep and infinite, drawing him in and leaving him lost as he tries to find his way out. he swears he’s never seen anything more beautiful.

he loves the way your lips curl around his name, as if tasting it, savoring it.

he loves the softness of your voice when it’s just the two of you, words softer than a baby’s bum. he loves the way you touch him, not just in the way that sets his skin on fire, though merlin knows it does, but in a way that makes him feel shy, with nothing but smiles and blushes. the way your fingers trail over the back of his ear when you think he isn’t paying attention. the way you lean into him for a kiss without thinking, as if your body knows what your lips want.

he loves the fire in you, the way you argue with him, push him, yet always find your way back. drawn to him like gravity. he loves the way you undress him, the way your breath hitches when he’s all vulnerable and naked, the way your pulse flutters beneath his lips when he moans against your throat.

god, he loves you. he loves you so much. he really fucking loves you.

═════════════

“WHAT HAPPENED?” pansy immediately shushed enzo with a small slap to his shoulder as he stepped through the door. the group of five stayed on the other side of the room, watching in silence. usually, they wouldn’t give two fucks if theodore decided to be lazy at five in the afternoon, they’d all done it before. but this was different: theodore had been in bed for a week straight.

not in the exhausted, crash after a long day kind of way. no, he hadn’t gotten up to shower. he hadn’t eaten. and now that theodore thought about it, he couldn’t even remember the last time he’d actually slept. he’d been lying in bed, yeah. but sleep? that hadn’t come at all.

his friends would stop by his apartment every few days to hang out, but theodore either told them to leave the second they walked in or didn’t bother responding at all; just laid there, silent, hoping they’d take the hint and get the fuck out. “he’s been like this all week,” blaise said, chocolate eyes filled with worry as he watched his best friend. “draco and i tried to talk to him, but it’s either an argument or nothing at all. no in between.”

“infuriating idiot,” enzo muttered under his breath, shooting his friends a look before deciding to try for himself. on the way over, he’d even grabbed theodore some snacks, so really, there was no excuse. who could argue with free food?

lorenzo watched as theodore lay there, staring blankly at the ceiling, hands tucked behind his head. “fuck are you moping around for?” enzo asked, dropping onto the edge of the bed. he held up the bag of snacks, giving it a little shake. “got your favorite, now you can’t be mad.”

now that enzo was closer, he could see it. he nearly gasped, but quickly snapped himself out of it, blinking rapidly: theodore had become a mix of scrawny and weak flesh, cheekbones sharper, eyes drooping with exhaustion. he swore he’d seen this fucker just a week ago, and things had seemed somewhat stable.

it was strange. enzo had never seen theodore like this before, so detached, so… small. his silence was deafening, as if he were in a contest of wills where the prize was his very soul. that’s how quiet he was. for a singular moment, enzo thought theo wouldn’t say anything, just like blaise had warned. he barely even looked conscious. his eyes were open, yeah, but that was about it.

what had brought him to this? what was making him so strangely quiet, so weirdly small? enzo was about to open his mouth again, ready to be harsher than he planned when something happened.

a nod. a quick, almost invisible tilt of theo’s head. from the small sound pansy made behind him, enzo had a feeling that was the first reaction any of them had gotten from theodore all week.

“snacks?” enzo tried, holding them out. theodore shook his head slightly, silent refusal.

that’s when it hit enzo. something was wrong. not just because theodore hadn’t looked away from the ceiling, like enzo’s words were going in one ear and out the other. not just because he looked so drained, so unhealthy. but because he didn’t even reach for the snacks. theo would’ve snatched the bag right out of his hold by now.

enzo’s stomach twisted. he held the snacks a little higher, hoping for any sort of reaction, but theodore didn’t move. not even a twitch.

pansy stepped forward, a little hesitantly, and placed a hand on enzo’s shoulder. “we need to do something,” she murmured, voice quiet as though speaking too loud would shatter whatever fragile state theodore was in. which was exactly what theo didn’t want. he didn’t want pity. he didn’t want anyone to feel sorry for him, and he certainly didn’t want them here, hovering over him. but if he told them to leave, he knew he’d be the one in the wrong.

lorenzo glanced at pansy, helplessness bubbling up. “what do you want me to do? he’s barely even fuckin’ here. look at him.” don’t look at me, please, theodore wanted to say.

“we need to get him to talk. whatever it is, he’s shutting us out,” draco said, pulling a book from theodore’s small bookshelf. “we can’t just let him keep doing this.” please, let me keep doing this. it’s the only thing that keeps me sane, theodore thought.

blaise nodded in agreement. “he won’t even look at us. we can’t force him, but we can’t just wait around either.” besides, they had already done the waiting, each of them taking turns to check on theodore. enzo however, was distracted by other things, and his girlfriend. he wasn’t around as much as the others, but he was closer to theodore than anyone else. if there was anyone nott might finally open up to and admit what was wrong, they all hoped it would be berkshire.

the room fell into an uncomfortable silence, all of them watching theodore’s still form. however, enzo wasn’t sure how much longer he could stay silent. the way theodore looked now: empty, disconnected, was oddly breaking him.

he leaned forward, a bit more determined this time, and gently shook the bag of snacks. “theo,” he said, softer this time, “you can’t keep doing this. you’re scaring the hell out of us.” you’re fucking scared for me? i’m scared for myself, theodore wanted to say.

another moment of silence passed, then theodore finally moved. not much, but enough. his head shifted slightly, and his eyes flickered, almost like he was struggling to focus. enzo’s heart skipped, unsure if it was the beginning of a breakthrough or another dead end. “do you want me to bring that girl over here to make you talk—”

“i’m fine?” theodore’s voice sounded more like a question than a statement, as if the answer was being questioned rather than told, and it didn’t sound like someone who was ‘just fine.’ the words felt flat.

enzo clenched his jaw, fighting the urge to snap. he knew he wasn’t fine. but what could he say? what could he do? “you don’t look fine.” at all.

theodore didn’t respond, eyes drilled to the ceiling. the silence settling between them once more as the rest of the group watched quietly. pansy stepped closer, speaking gently, “theodore, we’re here for you. you don’t have to do this alone.” but that’s what theodore wants. he wants to be alone. stay alone, live alone, spend the rest of his life alone. alone, alone, alone.

mattheo nodded. “whatever it is, we’re not leaving until you talk to us. we’ll figure it out together.”

for a second, there was nothing but the sound of theodore’s shallow breaths. and then, finally, he spoke again;

“no.” leave me alone.

it wasn’t harsh, wasn’t an argument. theodore simply didn’t want to talk. he didn’t want help. he didn’t want anyone there.

enzo had been bracing for a breakdown, for some sort of emotion, but this was worse. this was complete emptiness, the silence that screamed louder than any words ever could. it was like the doors had slammed shut, and no matter how hard they tried to knock, theodore wasn’t going to let them in.

and what do you do when you’ve already knocked politely and the person on the other end isn’t responding? you break the door down.

“we’re not leaving, theo. not until you talk to us.”

enzo reached for the snacks again, gripping them tightly, as though the act itself might force something out of theodore. “if you don’t start talking now, i’ll find that girl and ask her myself.” enzo wasn’t stupid. maybe a little slow at times, but when it came to figuring out what was eating at his friends, he either demanded the truth or figured it out on his own. it wasn’t obvious at first, but the way theodore’s throat visibly tightened, the way his eyes darted toward him, was the confirmation lorenzo needed.

it had to be something to do with that girl theodore had been spending most of his time with. it made sense, theodore had always been a sucker for romance. he loved the idea of loving someone with all his being, of caring for them through every step of life.

when he first started talking to her, he didn’t tell his friends right away, respecting her wish not to be anyone’s girlfriend at the moment. they understood and didn’t press him further. but enzo had never seen theodore as happy as he did then: there was a kick in his step, something brighter in his eyes. now, though, it was all the opposite: drained and helpless. and the way theodore visibly grimaced at the mere mention of her? that told enzo everything.

“i don’t… know how,” theodore whispered. voice weak, but it was there, cracked and all, but there.

“just start from the beginning and tell us what happened,” pansy cut in, her voice as soft as it had ever been. enzo gave her a subtle nudge, signaling for her to dial it back a little.

theodore nodded, slowly sitting up in his bed. “things were going so well,” he began, and immediately, everyone fell silent, their full attention on him. “and then?” enzo prodded, not bothering to hide his impatience. he didn’t have time for theodore to drag this out any longer.

“and then…” he huffed. “they weren’t.”

DAY 001.

sitting in a corner of his favorite coffee shop, eyes glued to the pages of a book he wasn’t really reading, but pretending to: theodore had always been someone who treasured peaceful moments, much like this one. he was always a little lost in thought, but today, his mind wasn’t on the book, wasn’t on the quiet talk of the shop or the hum of the espresso machine.

no, today, his thoughts were scattered in the direction of someone in particular.

he’d noticed you the moment you stepped inside, a sight that had a way of drawing eyes, without even trying. you were gorgeous, a kind of beauty that made everything around you seem ordinary by comparison. your hair was the color of the late summer sun, a soft, warm shade that made him want to reach out and touch it: just to see if it felt as soft as it looked.

you moved with such classiness, smile lighting up the shop the way the first rays of dawn lit the sky. but what really made you stand out, what really caught him, were your eyes; dark, twinkling.

theodore had always been a firm believer in love at first sight, a hopeless romantic at heart. but despite his beliefs, he had never truly experienced it himself. he had found plenty of girls attractive, even beautiful, but never in a way that instantly captivated his mind and pulled him in.

he hadn’t meant to stare, really. but he couldn’t help it. you were sitting across the shop, reading your own book, completely unaware of his gaze. and for some reason, today, he couldn’t pull himself away. you had this laugh: soft, almost musical, that echoed in his mind, even as he tried to read the same sentence for the third time. he’d never been so entranced by someone before. the way you furrowed your brow when you were deep in thought, the way your lips moved as you whispered lines from your book.

so, naturally, it was at that exact moment, when his thoughts were completely consumed by you, that disaster struck.

he wasn’t paying attention to anything else, too caught up in the mesmerization of your presence, when he felt a sharp, sudden pressure on his hand. it wasn’t until the heat rushed through his skin, painfully hot and burning, that he realized what had happened.

he had, without a second thought, been holding his coffee cup too tightly, too carelessly, and in his dazed trance, the hot liquid had sloshed out, spilling straight onto his fingers.

“shit!” he hissed, the pain finally snapping him out of his fog. he looked down at his hand, now starting to redden from the burn, and then, just then, he heard your voice:

“sir? your hand is burning.” how did you get here so quickly? when did you even get up? did he shout that loudly? oh my god.

his eyes shot up, and there you fuckin’ were. standing in front of him. the beautiful, perfect woman he had been staring at for the last few minutes. he blinked a few times, the world still a little blurry, his mind struggling to process.

“oh. yeah.” he couldn’t think of anything else to say. what was he supposed to say? he just burned himself because he was staring at you like an idiot?

he didn’t have time to finish that thought before he realized — shit, yeah, his hand hurt. his hand now burning with the heat of the spilled coffee, was all he could focus on. and now that the initial shock was over, panic started to set in. great, now he was freaking out.

"fuck, fuck, fuck."

but you didn’t seem phased at all. your gorgeous eyes were concerned but not judgmental, and there was this little smirk tugging at the corner of your lips. you weren’t laughing at him. no, you weren’t the type. but you could probably see how utterly ridiculous he looked in this moment.

“are you okay?” you asked, stepping closer, your tone a hint of playfulness, like you found it funny, but in a good way. your gaze didn’t leave his hand, and theodore’s mind was whirling, too stunned to even answer you at first. he opened his mouth to say something, anything, but the words got stuck somewhere in his throat.

“uh, i… think i need ice.” he finally stuttered, realizing how ridiculous he must look sitting there, holding his now painful hand. his words were out before he could think about them, and he immediately felt embarrassed. but then you nodded and quickly turned to the counter, calling for the barista behind the register.

“can you get some ice, please?” your voice was sweet, and theodore watched as you moved effortlessly behind the counter, speaking to the barista with such calmness.

he couldn’t stop staring at you. you were so beautiful, even in this insane situation. you weren’t fazed by him, weren’t judging him for what he assumed was an incredibly awkward moment. in fact, there was a little spark in your eyes that made his stomach do flips. he had to admit it: he was definitely caught in your orbit.

and if he wasn’t careful, he might just let himself get pulled in.

when you returned, you handed him a small paper towel with some ice wrapped inside. “here,” you said, voice feather light. “just hold that for a few minutes. i’m pretty sure you’ll live.”

theodore took the ice, still a little too dazed to process what was happening. “thanks,” he said, realizing he was grinning like a fool for someone who just got their hand burned. but he couldn’t help it. there was something about the way you were looking at him that made him feel like maybe everything was going to be okay.

you laughed softly, that same sound that had captivated him earlier. “no problem,” you said, tone relaxed, though there was something warm behind it. “but next time, maybe… don’t stare so hard?”

theodore froze. had you caught him? he opened his mouth to apologize, but you beat him to it. “…kidding,” you added with a wink. “but seriously, you should be careful next time. coffee’s not the only thing that can burn you.”

theodore chuckled nervously. “i’ll, uh, keep that in mind.” he felt like a total idiot, but somehow, it didn’t feel as bad as it should have. there was something about your easy smile and playful teasing, that made him feel… well, alive.

you two sat there for a while, talking about everything and nothing. he’d ask you about your book, and you’d answer with a smile, genuinely interested in talking to him. and he’d talk about his favorite songs, the ones that reminded him of late night drives, and you’d listen, truly listening, like you cared about his words.

and as the minutes passed, theodore started to realize that maybe this was the beginning of something. something good. something that wasn’t just a random coffee shop encounter.

and maybe that was exactly what he needed.

DAY 005.

the record shop was quiet, the sound of a guitar riff playing somewhere in the background. the smell of vinyl, old paper, and dust; a scent that somehow felt nostalgic, even if neither of you had ever been here before. with shelves lined with records from every genre, spanning decades of music history. the kind of spot where you could lose yourself for hours, flipping through rows of albums, and still discover something new.

you and theo had spent the last hour wandering the aisles, talking about everything. it was easy like that: being with him. there was no pressure, no expectation, no labels, just the two of you in your own little world, surrounded by music that both felt like home and yet like an exciting unknown.

he had been humming along to an old jazz record when he looked over at you, eyes bright with amusement. “you know,” he said, raising an eyebrow, “i think we’ve been here so long, i might just start buying a bunch of records i don’t even have the equipment to play.”

you laughed softly, shaking your head. “yeah, but look at this place. there’s something beautiful about it… you can’t leave without at least buying one.”

he grinned, turning to flip through another stack of vinyls. “well, if you insist, i guess i’ll have to get something… but only if you do the same.”

you shrugged casually, but inside you were already scanning the shelves, feeling a little giddy at the thought of picking out a record for yourself. you’d always loved the thought of vinyls; the crackling sound, the physicality of putting the needle down. and there was something about sharing this with theodore that made the experience even more special.

you continued to flip through the records, and then it happened. as your hand brushed past a familiar cover, you froze.

“the smiths!” you said at the same time theo did, both of you speaking in unison, as if your minds were completely in sync.

you were obsessed with the smiths, always playing their music around your tiny apartment whenever you decided to wake up early for breakfast or blast it while you took a shower, singing along like you were in a karaoke session. theodore shared the same love for the smiths. whenever it was his turn to play dj with his friends, no matter what they were doing, he'd crank up the smiths to full volume.

it was such a silly moment, both of you saying the same thing at the exact same time. you turned to him, eyes wide with surprise, and he matched your look, both of you suddenly aware of the perfect timing.

you quickly snatched the vinyl, and theodore thought you were about to say something, but instead, you just grabbed it and headed toward the front of the shop. the person behind the counter, a young guy who’d been listening to the two of you talk, smiled knowingly and immediately grabbed the record from your hand.

he didn’t even ask, just slid it onto the turntable and pressed play.

before either of you could say anything, the familiar sound of: ‘there is a light that never goes out’ began to fill the spot, the opening guitar riff sweeping through. you felt a jolt of excitement.

the planet felt tinier, just the two of you and this beautiful song. you couldn’t help yourself. a laugh bubbled up, and before you even knew what you were doing, you stepped forward and gave theodore a playful shove.

"come on! you have to dance with me now," you teased, holding out your hand for him to take. theodore stared at you like you'd just killed his cat. here? right here? in the middle of the shop?

theo hesitated for a split second, but the smile on your face was contagious. he grinned back at you, shrugging in mock defeat. “guess i don’t have much of a choice, do i?”

"nope, not at all." theo glanced at your outstretched hand, then immediately took it with his larger one. you both began swaying to the music, spinning lightly, completely unconcerned about looking a bit ridiculous in a nearly empty record shop.

there was no need for anything fancy, just two people, letting the music guide them. the way your fingers brushed together. the way your gazes held for a second longer than usual. the laughter between you was softer, but beneath it was a chemistry neither of you could deny.

he stepped a little closer, and you could feel the warmness of his body as the music swirled around you both. it was confidential in its plainness, the kind of familiarity that had nothing to do with anything physical, but everything to do with the way you fit together in that moment. the song seemed to go on forever, both of you lost in it, too focused on the way you seemed to mirror each other to care about anything else.

at one point, you twirled, and he spun you with ease, hands in the air for a second before you found your way back into his arms. you weren’t thinking about how silly it probably looked. you weren’t thinking about anything except the contact you shared. the way the music made everything feel so cinematic, as if this was the only moment that amounted to something. the only thing that existed was you, him, and this damn song.

when the song finally faded, you both slowed, standing there in a breathless silence, still holding on to each other as the last notes played out. theodore looked at you with an almost amused smile, a sparkle in his eyes that wasn’t there a moment ago.

“not bad,” he said, a little out of breath. not bad at all. he wasn’t out of breath from the dancing; it was more from the way you were moving so close to him.

you cheekily grinned back at him, unable to stop the goofy smile that spread across your face. “i think we might be a pretty good pair.”

“oh, definitely,” he replied.

the record continued to spin, both of you moved back toward the counter. neither of you had to say anything to confirm what was happening. the way he looked at you, the way you felt when you were near him, it was already there, clear as day.

“i think i’ll take this one,” you said, nodding toward the album that had started it all. theodore smiled, teeth and all. “yeah, me too.”

DAY 010.

“is that your boyfriend?” asked chloe, pointing to theodore with a drunken grin.

it was one of those small parties your friends always seemed to throw at their place; flickering lights, loud music, filled with the smell of alcoholic drinks and cheap cologne. people were laughing, talking, and dancing in the corner, but the energy felt more chaotic than fun. your friends had a way of getting a little too wild after a few too many drinks. you were standing by the little bar, quietly observing, hoping you could have a conversation without getting caught up in the madness.

theodore was next to you, sipping on his drink but barely making a dent in it. he’d been quiet all evening, leaning against the counter as you spoke to the others, but always close enough that you could feel the easy comfort between you two. it wasn’t like you had to try hard to make conversation with theo.

the music blasted, and you found yourself smiling at the way theodore seemed perfectly at ease despite the loudness. you were about to say something when one of your more outspoken friends, chloe, came up to you, clearly a little tipsy. she slurred a bit as she spoke, eyes moving between you and theodore.

you had blinked, momentarily thrown off guard by the question. you didn’t have a boyfriend, and definitely didn’t want to put any labels on what you and theodore had. it was… something, but not something you were prepared to define.

you shook your head, the corner of your lips pulling up into a small smile. “no. he’s not.”

she raised her eyebrows, eye drifting between you two, a smile tugging at her lips. “do you want him to be?”

you felt a slight knot form in your stomach. you glanced at theodore, who seemed to be distracted by the conversation happening across the party, looking more like an observer than someone caught in the middle of the conversation.

“no,” you said quickly, a little too quickly, before realizing the quickness of your words. “i don’t want a boyfriend.”

chloe squinted at you, clearly not satisfied with the answer, even though she was clearly a few drinks in. “why not? you two seem perfect together,” she hiccuped, not exactly trying to be subtle.

you diverted your weight from one foot to the other, suddenly feeling a little uncomfortable under her questioning. you had always been the type to keep your emotions in check, never one to easily open up about what was really going on in your head. relationships were always a bit too complicated for you, something you avoided because of how messy they could get. but now, with her asking you directly, you had to find a way to explain it without sounding like you were dodging the truth.

you shrugged slightly, trying to keep your tone feather light, but the words came out harsher than you intended. “i just don’t want to be anyone’s girlfriend.”

ouch. that was a punch to the gut.

chloe burped, trying to process what you said. “what’s that supposed to mean?” she asked, her voice confused but still investigating. ugh, chloe and her nose that seem to be everywhere it shouldn't be. theodore turned slightly to face you. he gave you a small look, one that said he wasn’t entirely sure what was happening, but he was still there. eyes meeting yours.

you felt your stomach twist uncomfortably. you’d never really explained it to anyone, not in this way. you didn’t like the idea of labels. you didn’t want the responsibility of being someone’s ‘other half’ or fitting into a predefined mold. you didn’t want to be something you had to define or protect.

“don’t know,” you muttered, looking down at your drink for a second, then back at chloe. “it’s just… i don’t want to be tied to someone. i don’t want to be anyone’s girlfriend, you know?” chloe didn’t seem entirely satisfied with that, but she shrugged, probably too drunk to press it further. she gave you a teasing grin, as if she was still convinced you were just playing hard to get. “well, if you change your mind, i’ll be waiting for the wedding invite.”

you rolled your eyes, trying to brush it off, but the conversation had left you feeling uneasy. you glanced at theodore, who had gone back to his previous position, quietly observing the party.

you didn’t want to complicate things. you didn’t want to risk anything between you and theodore: what you had was easy and you didn’t want to mess with that. he wasn’t asking for anything from you, and that was what made it different from everything else you’d experienced. but at the same time, the chemistry between you two was undeniable, and sometimes it felt like you were standing on the edge of something that could become more if you were willing to let it.

but not tonight.

“come on, let’s get out of here,” you said to theo, trying to change the subject. “this place is getting too crazy.”

he raised an eyebrow, a playful smile crossing his face. “escape while we can, huh?”

“mhm.” you nodded, relieved that he didn’t push the conversation further. you grabbed his hand, tugging him toward the door, ready to leave behind the noise and confusion. whatever was happening between you two, whatever it might become, you didn’t need to rush it. you just needed to take it one step at a time, and for once, that felt like enough.

DAY 020:

“delivery!” before you could even pull yourself from the comfort of your bed, the door creaked open, revealing theodore. his messy curls and the sleepy flash in his eyes made it clear that he had been up for hours, carefully planning something. in his hands, he was hiding something, a devilish spark dancing in his gaze.

“got you something,” he said softly. you squinted at him through the confusion of sleep, raising a bushy eyebrow. “what’s all this? you’re acting suspicious.”

he gave you that handsome grin of his, the one that could melt the hardest of hearts, and shook his head. “suspicious? me?” his tone was playful, but you could hear a softness beneath it, something that made you realize he was trying to hide his excitement.

just as you were about to ask him again, you heard it: a soft sound. a tiny, delicate mewl that tugged at your heart. your breath caught in your chest, and before you could even process it, theodore pulled his hands from behind his back and revealed the tiniest, fluffiest little kitten you had ever seen.

the little kitten in his hands was so cute, you honestly felt like you might burst right then and there. you’d dropped hints to theodore countless times about wanting a cat, but to actually see him holding one, this tiny, perfect ball of fur: it took your breath away.

he actually listened. holy shit.

your eyes enlarged. soft and white as snow, with wide, innocent eyes that blinked up at you like it was seeing the world for the first time. it was so small, its little paws barely making a sound on the edge of theodore’s hands. your heart flapped in your chest, as you couldn’t help but reach out with trembling fingers, just to confirm it was real.

he smiled, watching you with such affection in his eyes. “i know you wanted one,” he said quietly as he lowered the kitten into your lap. you gasped, hands instinctively catching it, cradling the tiny creature against your chest.

the kitten gave a soft meow, nuzzling into the warmth of your hands, its little nose twitching as it looked for comfort in your embrace. you looked up at theodore, overwhelmed by the sweetness.

“theo…” you breathed, voice dipped with so much emotion, trying to form words but finding them impossible.

he settled beside you on the bed, hand gently resting on your back, his touch grounding you. he watched you, eyes full of warmth, like he was seeing everything he had ever hoped for right before him.

“i wanted to give you something that you would love you,” he murmured softly. “something that would remind you every day how much you mean to me.”

you felt your heart swell, his words making everything else disappear. you looked down at the kitten, feeling the tiny pulse of life in your hands, and then back at theodore, your chest tight with something beautiful.

you couldn’t stop smiling. like the universe had conspired to give you this perfect moment, the kind of moment that felt like it belonged in a dream.

the little kitten blinked up at you, trusting you without question, you realized something.

you weren’t just holding a tiny life in your hands; you were holding something that would always remind you of theodore, his kindness, of the ways he showed you how much he cared.

regardless, you caught yourself thinking: why did he care? why was he so kind to you? so perfect? way too perfect.

the kitten nuzzled into your chest, curling up in the safest place it could find, you felt the most comforting warmth wrap around your heart. you didn’t need anything more. you had everything you needed right there, this little bundle in your lap.

DAY 035:

the first glare of sunrise had barely begun to color the sky with streaks of pink and orange, radiating a golden glow over everything. you stood beside theodore at the edge of the balcony, breath visible due to the cold air, but there was something comforting about the coolness. it felt like you were the only two people awake in the planet, in a place that existed just for the two of you.

theodore was calmer than usual, hand brushing lightly against yours as he motioned for you to follow him. his smile was small but full of excitement, a nervous energy you hadn’t seen from him before.

he led you toward the edge of the balcony, where the city stretched out below you, a breathtaking sight of towering, shimmering buildings, their sharp angles softened by the rising sun.

“this is it,” he said. his stare moved over the city, and you saw the way the light hit the buildings, releasing long shadows that made them seem even grander, more majestic. you couldn’t help but follow his gaze, taking in the stunning view, but what caught your attention wasn’t just the beauty of the city. it was the way theodore looked at it, as though this view, this moment, held more meaning than just the view itself.

“you’ve never seen the city like this, have you?” theo asked. you shook your head, feeling something stir in your chest. “no… it’s beautiful.” the words felt too small for the scene before you, but they were all you could manage.

theodore nodded, eyes not leaving the view. “it’s my favorite time of day. when everything feels new and everything’s beginning to settle down. the city feels like it’s just for you, like you’ve got the whole world at your feet.” he turned to face you then, his eyes full of that quiet passion you liked so much. “i wanted to share it with you.”

your heart skipped a beat.

you knew theodore well enough by now to understand that moments like these were rare for him, he didn’t often open up, didn’t often let others see the things he held closest to his heart. having that in mind, here he was, letting you into this piece of him. the view, the calm of the world at sunrise, the feeling of being completely alone with someone you cared for; it was all so intimate, so personal.

so… weird. in a good way.

right?

“you’re the only one i’ve ever shared this with,” he continued, stepping closer. the distance between you closed, his body enclosing as he looked down at you, gaze stable. you could see the defenselessness in his eyes, something he didn’t often let others see, but something that felt so raw.

you didn’t know how to feel.

“thank you,” you whispered, the words tumbling out before you could stop them. you hadn’t realized how much this moment meant to you until that second.

you looked up at him, heart so confusingly full, overwhelmed by how deeply he had shared something so meaningful with you. and that’s when you saw it; the way his eyes softened just a little, the way his lips parted in a way that seemed almost hesitant.

so beautifully.

without another word, he leaned in. slowly, as though he were giving you every chance to pull away, but you didn’t. you didn’t want to.

the distant murmur of the city seemed to evaporate, the promise of a new day, all of it faded as you closed your eyes and felt his lips brush gently against yours.

it was soft, almost as if testing the waters at first, unsure but still confident enough to take the bait. you let yourself sink into the kiss, your pulse quickening as the warmth of his lips ignited something inside you.

it was a kiss of biting and tugging before your bottom lips and tongues entwine.

theodore chuckled into the messy kiss before he suddenly grabbed your jaw, pulling away to part his own lips. then angled your head, forcing your kiss to be deep with him; dominating.

when your top lip became trapped between the velvety softness of his lips, which had become perfectly plump from the passion, he started moving against you. wet, smacking sounds of lips parting and greedily reconnecting, each smack of the lips more binding and starved than the last.

with the sun rising behind you and the city sprawling, in his mind, it was just the two of you. and when you pulled away, just slightly, you could see the same wonder reflected in theodore’s eyes; the same surprise, the same sense of awe.

“… amazing you are,” he whispered, breath mixing with yours. his words all soft and sincere, making your chest explode with butterflies.

DAY 040:

“fuckin’ beautiful.” theodore leans in, rosy lips trailing sloppy, wet kisses along your neck and collarbone as he grips your hips tightly. he spins you around and presses you against the cold shower wall, one hand palming your breast roughly. his dick throbbing insistently between your ass cheeks.

theo's hand squeezes your breast firmly, fingers pinching your hard nipple, rolling it between his thumb and forefinger. you can feel his cock, all huge and hard, sliding between your ass cheeks, the head leaking pre cum that mixes with the water streaming down your body.

what began as an innocent shower together quickly transformed into something much more eager. as theodore gently lathered shampoo into your hair, your mind raced with desire, consumed by the urge to have him inside you.

the feeling of his hardness pressing against you only fueled your appetite, making it difficult to focus on anything else.

with your back turned to him, the cool tiles of the shower sent shivers down your chest, heightening your awareness of every touch. theodore's left hand pressed firmly against your lower back, while his other hand explored your body, fingers teasingly playing with your chest.

with a deep groan, nott reaches down and guides the head of his swollen dick to your drenched pussy, pushes forward, spreading your tender lips apart as he sinks inside you with a turtle type of speed; sooo slow, sooo deep.

your body trembles, legs parting instinctively to take him deeper. “my beautiful girl, all needy and shit.”

theodore lifts your left leg, hooking your ankle over the edge of the tub. this position opens you up even more, his cock hitting deeper spots inside you. “augh!” he starts moving his hips, his dick sliding in and out of your pussy with wet, mushy sounds.

“god, you’re perfect," theodore grits out, hips pushing forward, driving his big size deep inside you. the water makes your body glisten, little water droplets sliding down your stomach and inner thighs.

the feeling is indeed perfect. but the way you're soaking wet has its downsides. his dick keeps slipping out with loud, wet 'plop' sounds due to your extreme arousal. it's frustrating him, making him grunt in annoyance between thrusts.

theodore pulls out, ignoring your mewling protest, his cock soaking with your juices. without a word, he yanks open the tub curtain, lifting you off the ground. your legs instinctively wrapping around his muscular torso.

you didn’t say a word, you trusted him as much as you needed him.

as soon as your legs are securely wrapped around his waist, he steps out of the shower, his left foot hitting the soft carpet first, followed by his right. the plush carpet tickles the soles of his feet. you expect theodore to carry you to the bed or bend you over the sink, but as soon as his feet touch the carpet outside the tub, he suddenly sinks to his knees.

he didn't take a single step; rather, he gently lowered you onto the bathroom floor, the soft carpet grazing your back. your legs stayed wrapped around his waist as his hand moved between your thighs, fingers parting your folds.

"stop being a tease," you snap, frustrated by his slow torture. you use your leg wrapped around his waist to pull him closer, digging the heel of your foot into his lower back to urge him deeper. it works, as you feel him finally slide fully inside you, filling you completely.

on the carpet, theodore's movements become even more crude. he pulls out slowly, cock glistening with water droplets. then, he thrusts back in, hips grinding against yours. your perky tits jiggle due to impact, nipples puckered red from his earlier sucking.

he swells inside you with each slam of his hips, your walls gripping and releasing.

"ohhh, right there," you gasp, gripping his biceps tightly as he hits the spot that sends shockwaves through your body. "right here?" theodore asks, pulling out completely before sliding back inside you, thrusting forward to hit the sensitive area over and over again.

"yes! yesss, please right there…" you beg, your lips parting with each jab he hits your g-spot. the sexiest moans he's ever heard echo through the bathroom, making him grip your thighs tighter to pound into you harder.

with both hands braced against the floor on either side of your head, his fingertips brushing against the bathroom carpet, theodore dips his head down to capture your bottom lip between his teeth. he pulls it down gently before releasing it.

the carpet provided a steady surface, and oh, you felt every inch of him. his handsome face only heightened the pleasure — this man was incredibly sexy. you didn’t want this to end, not yet, but you were so close: closer than you’d ever been. you couldn’t help yourself. god, you couldn’t help a single fucking thing.

theodore can feel your orgasm by the way you grasp the back of his head, pulling him against your chest as your legs tighten around him. he starts to pound into you harder, hitting the spot rougher and making you a mess. "wanna feel it all over me,"

you let go, hot and warm juices coating his dick as he jolts inside you. this causes him to thrust even deeper, the bulge in your stomach becoming more prominent. "holy shit," he groans, the sight and feel of you sending him over the edge as well.

"mhmmm," he breathes out heavily, feeling his release coming. swiftly pulling out just in time, theodore moves up your body until your mouth is perfectly aligned with his twitching cock. "open up," he rasps, watching as his red, swollen head pulsates dangerously close to your lips.

you could barely catch your breath after your orgasm, yet you obeyed, chest rising and falling, but you still listened.

"eat my fuckin’ kids," he snarls, pinching the tip of his dick slightly before releasing hot streams of cum into your mouth. you obediently swallow it down, your throat working to gulp it all down as he watches with heavy eyes.

DAY 055:

it started with a simple, “come with me,” as theodore tugged you outside in the middle of the night. wrapped in blankets, the two of you lay on the grass, staring up at the sky.

“you see that one?” he murmured, pointing at a bright star. “that one’s yours.”

you turned your head to look at him, raising an eyebrow. “mine?”

he smirked. “yeah. named it after you.” you snorted. “you can’t just name a star.” theodore had this gorgeous beauty mark right on his cheekbone, and you adored it. it made him look even more stunning, his face so perfectly beautiful.

“says who?” he turned his head to meet your gaze, eyes shining in the gloss of the moonlight. “it’s yours. and every time you look up at it, i want you to remember that someone out there thinks you’re just as bright.”

he was so perfect: so kind, so genuine, good in every way, inside and out. it made you wonder what you had done to deserve him, to deserve his presence, his time, and the quiet way he made the world feel softer just by being in it.

it also made you wonder why he felt too good for you. how he could be everything while you felt like nothing in comparison. the thought drowned you, a pang settling in your chest as theodore spoke, but his words blurred into nothing more than muffled noise.

did he really like you, or was it all just a performance? and if it was, how was he so convincing? but if it wasn’t: if every word, every glance, every touch was real — then how was he so naturally good at making people feel special, at knowing exactly what to say, exactly how to make someone feel good?

your heart did an embarrassing flip. you weren’t sure if it was from his kind words or the odd feeling stirring inside you: something new, something unsettling. either way, it made you shift slightly to your right, just enough to put a little more space between you and theodore, as if distance could quiet the flutter in your chest.

DAY 062:

theo had a bad habit of leaving his hoodies at your place, and you had a worse habit of stealing them. one beautiful day, he walked in to find you curled up on the couch in his sweatshirt, the sleeves swallowing your hands.

he wasn't mad. in fact, he found you incredibly sexy in his hoodie. the dark green brought out your curves, making him want to bend you over the kitchen counter. rather than, he crosses his arms against the doorway, "s’that my hoodie?" he asks.

your lovely face stretched into a small smile as you peeked up at him innocently. “no.” he laughed, walking over and tugging at the sleeve. “really? looks suspiciously like the one i lost last week.”

you remembered it vividly, actually. it was after the two of you had showered together: not the kind where he stopped midway just to fuck you on the carpet, but a simple, normal shower; where there was nothing sexual. just him gently massaging shampoo into your hair while you wrapped your arms around his waist, holding him close as the warm water dripped around you both. “finders keepers.”

he contracted his eyes before flopping onto the couch beside you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “fine,” he sighed. “but if you keep stealing my clothes, i might have to start stealing yours.”

you chuckled. “i’d pay to see you in my clothes.” and that’s exactly how, the very next day, you walked in on theodore lounging in one of your oversized pink sweaters, a smug grin on his face.

you laughed so fucking hard you nearly lost your balance, doubling over before launching yourself at him. with tickles, you tried to get your revenge, giggling uncontrollably until he turned the tables, grabbing you and attacking with a burst of kisses all over your face, leaving you breathless between your laughter.

for days on end, everything felt perfect. doubts would creep in occasionally, but they always disappeared the moment theodore got lost in you — and you in him.

it was fun. the two of you would hang out every day, visit different shops just to be near each other, and even go out to eat or simply stroll around hand in hand. you'd always get him to pose for a picture with your polaroid camera, the kind that prints photos on the spot. one time, at the beach during sunset, you asked a stranger to take a picture of you both kissing.

when you wanted to have fun at bars, you'd let loose, getting completely drunk and dancing without a care whenever a song played.

on other days, he only focused on giving you bliss, consuming you completely and making you feel every inch of him. whether pressed against the shower wall, at the edge of the bed, on the carpet, or even in the dresser. it didn't matter to him; all he cared about was having you wrap your legs around his waist and feeling himself within you.

but then, on day three hundred and five, something changed. the warmth stayed, but the space between you began to pull, unnoticeable at first, until the distance became impossible to ignore.

DAY 310:

theodore noticed it before you even realized what you were doing. the way your texts became shorter, the way your laughter didn’t come as easily, how you leaned away when he tried to pull you closer. it was fine at first, but now, it was questionable.

tonight, he had invited you over, hoping to shake the strange distance that had settled between you. he had picked up your favorite snacks, queued up a movie you once swore was ‘the only thing that could make a bad day better.’

but nothing worked.

you sat curled up at the far end of the couch, staring at your phone instead of the screen. your responses were dry, your smiles small, and every time he tried to meet your gaze, you looked away.

“you know, if i didn’t know any better,” theo started, a teasing lilt in his voice, “i’d think you were getting bored of me.” theo never really knew how to confront someone he cared about and tell them how their actions were making him feel. he hated confrontation, so the only way he felt he could address it was through humor.

you barely reacted, just hummed vaguely. nails tapping sharply against your phone screen.

his smirk faltered. “right, i get it, you’re too cool for me now,” he tried again, nudging your foot lightly with his own. “have i been replaced? do i need to fight someone for my spot?”

“not in the mood, theo,” you muttered, still not looking up. lately, you never seemed to be in the mood, which felt weird to him. you'd never been overly affectionate, but you always showed interest when he spoke. now, it was as if you were there, but not really present.

the playfulness in his eyes dimmed, but he pushed forward. “tell me what’s going on, then. you’ve been—” he hesitated, choosing his words carefully. as much as he wanted to understand what was going on, he didn't want to make you angry. he knew a conversation wouldn’t get anywhere if one person was upset. “different. distant.”

“nothing’s going on,” you said too quickly.

“right.” he leaned back on the couch, folding his arms. “so you just suddenly decided to stop talking to me like a normal person for no reason?”

you sighed, pressing the heels of your palms into your eyes. you didn’t want to do this. you didn’t want to explain the mess in your head, how everything felt overwhelming, how you could feel yourself pulling away and didn’t know how to stop it. how it was easier to create distance than risk needing him too much.

“i just have a lot on my mind,” you said finally. “and you couldn’t tell me that?” his voice was gentler now, but there was a thread of frustration beneath it.

“it’s not a big deal.”

“it is a big deal if it’s making you act like this.” he exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. “i don’t get it. i’m here, i’m trying, and it feels like you’re just — pushing me away.”

you weren't sure what to say. it wasn't that you didn’t want to talk; you simply wanted to enjoy a movie in silence, with the occasional glance at your phone. you hadn't come here for a conversation, otherwise, you wouldn't have come at all.

you did what you do best, got up and said, "i'll be back." this was what you did; walk away when real emotions start to arise — so good at giving him nothing.

DAY 335:

“m’sorry, m’sorry,” you murmured as theodore lay behind you, spooning you tightly. one hand gripped the pillow beneath your head while the other rested on your hip, moving in and out of you. the pleasure he was giving you was overwhelming, making apologies spill from your lips, remembering the way you had treated him.

“i accept it—mhm... i’ll always fuckin’ accept it,” theodore whispered into your ear. lying on your side, you couldn't align your lips with his, so you settled for biting your bottom lip as he left fat, dark hickeys all over you, while your wet walls embraced him.

your back arched off of his chest as you let out a low squeal. although the sound felt both loud and embarrassing, you buried your face in the pillow. no matter how you felt, theodore always knew how to make you feel incredible. like that distant itch finally being scratched, bringing you a sensation that felt nothing short of heavenly.

even as he slipped his hand into your hair and pulled gently, the slight pain at your scalp was pleasurable. “so good, so fucking good…” you felt embarrassed by how loud you were, but you couldn't help it. amidst the overwhelming thoughts swirling in your mind, this was a different kind of release. a much-needed stress relief.

you both didn't even bother to fully undress; your shorts and underwear were bunched down to your knees, your bra unclasped, while your shirt was twisted up to your collarbones.

“mm... faster,” you gasped, even though theodore was already thrusting at a fast pace. but this was finally pulling you away from the chaos in your mind. utterly lost in the feeling, theodore complies, willing to do anything for you. he gives it his all; everything he has. “take it, take it, take it,” he urges.

DAY 340:

theodore’s excitement was noticeable from the moment you stepped into the vinyl shop. the bell above the door jingled, announcing your arrival, and he strode in like he owned the place, like he had been waiting all day for this. blue eyes excitedly darting from shelf to shelf, fingers wriggling with the need to sift through the collection.

“i’ve been meaning to bring you back here,” he said, a grin playing at the edges of his lips as he ran his hands along the spines of stacked records. “there’s so much i didn’t get to show you last time.”

you didn’t respond. you barely even looked at him. your arms remained crossed, your expression neutral. your shoulders were squared, posture stiff. that was the difference between you and theodore — he practically bounced on his feet with enthusiasm.

“oh! you have to see this one.” theo grabbed a record off the shelf and turned to you, holding it out like some grand discovery. the cover was a faded blue with worn edges, an old jazz album that you might’ve cared about once. his eyes flashed with excitement, waiting for your reaction.

you glanced at it for half a second before replying, “cool. y’should get it.”

his grin faltered, just slightly, before he covered it up with a forced chuckle. “okay, maybe not your style, but wait, what about this?” he reached for another one, something more in line with your usual taste. he flipped the cover over, tapping the tracklist like he was revealing some hidden jewel.

you met his gaze. “it’s fine.”

silence hung between you for a second too long. he blinked, clearly waiting for more — some indication that you were even remotely interested, that you were happy to be here with him. but you weren’t going to give him that.

he exhaled sharply, shaking his head with a soft laugh that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “okay, tough crowd today.” he moved down the aisle, pretending like he wasn’t rattled. “oh, now this, this is one of my favorites.” he plucked another vinyl from the shelf, turning toward you with that same boyish excitement that should’ve made your chest tighten. “i swear, if you actually listen to this one, you’d—”

“i don’t need the sales pitch, theodore.” your voice was bland, cutting through his eagerness. his smile disappeared completely this time. “i’m just trying to share something with you.”

you let out a slow breath, keeping your expression impassive. “and i’m just here to get what i came for. that’s it.”

he looked at you then. the way your lips pressed into a thin line, the way your arms stayed crossed like a barrier between you both, the way your eyes didn’t hold the warmth they used to.

“right,” he muttered. he put the vinyl back on the shelf a little too carefully, like he suddenly had no idea what to do with his hands. you turned away from him, moving towards the counter to find what you actually came for. behind you, you could hear him shift his weight, debating whether to keep trying or to just let it be.

DAY 370:

theodore thought you brought him here to fix things. it was written all over his face; the slight hope in his eyes, the way his hands fidgeted with his coffee cup, like he truly believed this conversation would bring you both back to where you used to be. but as you sat across from him, staring at the swirling foam in your untouched drink, you knew that wasn’t going to happen.

you took a breath and said it. “i think we should stop seeing each other.”

the change in his expression was instant. you hesitated to look up, knowing that eye contact had never been your strong suit. you were certain that meeting his gaze would only make everything feel worse.

his fingers tightened around his cup, body stiffening like he’d just been blindsided. “what?”

you swallowed hard but kept your voice steady. “this thing we’re doing… it’s not normal.” it’s not. and it’s been chewing at you, consuming your thoughts for so long. you liked liking theodore, enjoying his presence, talking to him. but you hated when he started acting like a boyfriend instead of a friend. you noticed the jealousy in his eyes when other men talked to you, the way he’d get upset when you mentioned other friends, and how he’d always want to know where you were when you weren’t with him. but you don’t have the right to feel this way, because you’re the one who’s been leading him on: kissing him, touching him, being way too damn intimate. you just want it all to stop.

theodore let out a short, disbelieving laugh. in no way, shape, or form did he find this conversation funny, but as usual, he couldn’t take anything seriously. he always had to brush it off with a joke. “since when do you care about what’s normal?”

“i just…” you exhaled. “i think we’re forcing something that isn’t working.”

his brows furrowed. “that’s not true.”

you sighed, rubbing your temple. you hated that phrase. every time someone says, ‘that's not true,’ while you're expressing your feelings, it blows your mind. who do they think they are, deciding that what you feel isn’t how you feel? “theo—”

“no,” he cut you off, leaning forward. “yeah, we argue, but that doesn’t mean we’re not good together. we fight because we care. that’s what people do when they give a fuck.”

"that's exactly what i don’t want! look at us, arguing because we care! look at everyone staring at us like we’re crazy just because we care!" you shook your head, your voice lowering. "it shouldn’t be this hard all the time."

“it’s only hard because you make it hard,” he shot back. “you pull away, you shut me out, and then you tell me we don’t work. how the fuck is that fair?”

you looked down, your throat tightening. “i’m just trying to be honest.” the last thing you wanted was for frustrated tears to spill from your eyes: that’s the absolute last thing you needed, especially with people watching.

“honest?” he scoffed. “or just looking for another excuse to run?” run. you always ran when things got too complicated, when feelings you despised started to settle in your chest, tightening your throat as if it were closing in around you, threatening to suffocate you. you hated it. you hated it. you hated it.

before you could respond, a barista hesitantly stepped up to the table. “um… would you like anything else?”

theodore let out a humorless chuckle, shaking his head. the chair he had been sitting in creaked loudly as he stood up, drawing even more attention as people turned to look. the lady's eyes widened as theo brushed past her.

you couldn’t let him leave, not without a proper goodbye. your chest clenched. “theodore, don’t go. you’re still my best friend!” you blurted out, desperation slipping into your voice. his lips parted, for the smallest moment. then, jaw clenched, he shook his head slightly and walked away, leaving you sitting there.

theodore wasn’t the same after that night. it was like something inside him had been ripped out, leaving behind a hollowed out version. the change wasn’t instant, it crept in slowly, as if it were bleeding; staining everything in its path.

at first, they believed he’d snap out of it. mattheo, draco, pansy, blaise, and lorenzo each tried in their own way to pull him out from whatever had settled over him. mattheo cracked even more stupid jokes than usual, draping an arm around theo’s shoulders and dragging him into conversations he clearly didn’t want to be part of. draco would do something ridiculous, like tickling his foot, just to get some kind of reaction (which resulted in a foot to the face a moment later). pansy made excuses for his behavior when others asked why he seemed so distant, why he was never around anymore. blaise and lorenzo brought him drinks, snuck him out to parties, and even placed bets on how long it would take before he’d start acting like himself again.

but none of it worked. theodore was a ghost in his own skin. he barely spoke unless he had to, barely ate unless someone reminded him. his usual charisma now felt forced. the man who had once carried himself with such cool confidence now looked like he was constantly on the verge of collapse, as if his thoughts were too heavy to carry; like having just finished a brutal workout and still being expected to run a marathon.

theo never thought the saying “life’s only worth living if someone’s loving you” could be so painfully true. but was it really love?

no. someone who truly loved him wouldn’t drag him along for so long just to throw him away like trash, while you act as the waste collector.

it didn’t take much to set him off: one wrong look, one thoughtless comment, one whisper that he misinterpreted. one second he’d be silent, and the next, he’d be lunging at some poor bastard, his temper burning through his veins like wildfire. there was one thing about wildfires: you either extinguish them carefully or let them spread. and your absence made the fire grow, until everything theodore touched felt like it was burning in his hands.

mattheo had to intervene when theo nearly broke someone’s nose at work because they had laughed a little too loudly at something he mistook for mockery. even blaise, the most patient of them all, ended up in a screaming match with him one night after telling him to “get over it.”

“you think i want to be like this?” theodore had snapped harshly. “you think i wake up every fucking morning and choose to feel like this?”

enzo was the only one who never pushed too hard. instead, he sat beside theodore when he needed it, offering quiet companionship rather than empty reassurances. but even enzo, as patient as he was, couldn’t bring back the light in theodore’s eyes.

nott thought this heartbroken feeling would only last a few days, maybe a few weeks. you never even dated, so surely, sure-fucking-ly, it wouldn’t hurt for this long.

130 days.

130 days of waking up to the same crushing emptiness, of drowning in memories he didn’t know how to escape.

130 days of avoiding certain places, certain people, because even the smallest reminder felt like a knife in his ribs.

130 days of pretending it didn’t hurt. and on day 500, he realized what he felt was certain: how he truly felt about you was final.

═════════════

THEODORE HATES the way your presence makes him feel, even when you're not around. like the scent of coconut on his sheets; he hates being reminded of you, of how you’d sleep in his bed, make him feel good, make him feel like he mattered. he's consumed by how your eyes hold an entire forest, pulling him in and leaving him lost. that’s what you do, isn’t it? you make him lose himself, hoping he could somehow find his way out.

he hates the way your lips curl around his name, filled with lies, how effortlessly you fed him one lie after another. he hates the softness of your voice when it’s just the two of you, knowing it meant nothing, friends don’t speak to each other like that.

he hates the way you touched him, how he can still feel your soft kisses on his neck, your moans muffled against his skin. he hates how your fingers would trace the back of his ear when you thought he wasn’t paying attention, because now, every time he remembers it, he flinches away.

god, he hates you. he hates you so much. he really fucking hates you.

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