#I saw him several times but always the same way: in his room sitting hunched over on the side of his bed in a singlet chain-smoking

[goldenempyrean]

Testing Her Theory

〚 Notes - Okay, finally got out of my writers block. Sooo this was written ;) Hopefully should be writing some reqs too soon :) 〛

〚 Summary - Nat’s not feeling great on her shift, but theres no way you’ll let her work for long 〛

〚 Wordcount - 1450 〛

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“Does anyone know what ails our fair Natasha?” Thor asked as he entered the room, greeted by the sight of you and several other avengers playing Mario on the big TV while stuffing your faces with snacks.

The mention of your girlfriend’s name caught your attention, putting down your controller, you looked up and asked, “What do you mean?”

“Well,” Thor began, taking a seat amongst the other Avengers seated on the couch, “She had sneezed several times and to be courteous I said, ‘bless you’ and instead of saying ‘thank you’, Natasha forcefully hurled a tissue box directly at my face.”

The room shared a collection giggle as Thor continued to exaggerate the extent of Natasha’s uncalled for anger, but you couldn’t help but feel an inkling of worry. 

You knew Nat had complained the previous night about not feeling well and you hadn’t seen her since breakfast that morning, even then, she had seemed quieter than usual, more reserved and you couldn’t help but wonder if she still felt ill.

“I think Nat’s catching a bit of a cold.” You admitted once everyone had calmed back down, “She’s probably not feeling well, don’t take it to heart, I’ll go check on her.”

Thor gave you a thumbs up as you passed him your controller, letting him take over for you, “Where is Natasha?” You asked, looking over your shoulder as you stood up to leave.

“She was in Stark’s main lab when I last saw her, sitting where all the main observation screens are.”  Thor replied, as he reached to take a handful of popcorn from the big bowl sat on the coffee table.

“Alright, I’ll go make some tea and see how she is, have fun playing Mario guys.”

“Text us if you need anything.”

“Will do!”

〘✧〙

Tony’s lab was as pristine as it always is. The floor, countertops, and work surfaces gleam with the same clean, sterile sheen that had come to be associated with Stark's aesthetics. Infact the other thing out of place is Natasha herself, she's in one of Stark’s leather chairs, her head resting in her hands as she sat hunched over his main table.

“Somebody told me there's a miserable Avenger who could use a cup of tea,” You smiled, seeing Natasha lift her head out of her hands at the recognisable sound of your voice, “but I couldn’t find one, so you’ll have to do.”

“Very funny.” She spoke sarcastically but still eagerly reached for the steaming cup you held out to her. Her fingers twisting round the handle as she held the cup close to her face, taking deep breaths of the hot steam.

You shrugged, amused with your own humour, “I thought so.”

A light flush ran across the bridge of her nose, and there was an endearing little smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "Thank you" her tone was sincere, a sweet little purr leaving her lips as she turned her attention back to the mug of tea.

“Soo,” You began as you hoisted yourself up to be sitting on the table, “I heard you violently assaulted Thor with a malice weapon earlier.

That earned you a chuckle, as the redhead shook her head at your dramatic exaggeration, “He wouldn’t stop pestering me, so I gave him so light motivation to leave.”

You raised an eyebrow, “Light motivation, hm?”

“Yup.”

“Okay then, whatever you say sweetheart.”

You both sat in silence for several minutes before you noticed that Natasha had begun to slowly massage the corners of her temples as she held her head in her hands again.

You hesitated to question her; you knew Natasha hated admitting to anything that showed she wasn’t a carbon-perfect human being in peak condition, so you dropped your tone, almost whispering the words, “Sweetie, do you want me to get you something for that headache?”

"No, no, I'll be alright." Nat's hand continues its incessant rubbing, massaging the tender flesh at the base of her skull. She can feel it even behind her glassed-over eyes, "Just give me… just a minute."  

A minute passes—ten, even—and the redheaded-Russian's headache shows no sign of ceasing. And the pressure in her head only multiples when she quickly clasps her hoodie sleeve to her face, sneezing down into it.

“Hu’tshhiew! Hhep’tshoo!”

“Bless.” You cooed, as Natasha groaned, letting her head rest on the table. You reached out to rub the tension in her temples and you fingers catch in a tangle of knotted locks and you carefully ran your hand through, untangling it.

Her voice is husky with exhaustion when she mutters a reply. “Your hands feel nice.”

There is something about making Nat feel better that makes you feel warm inside. With a satisfied hum, you slid your hands into her hair to massage her scalp. She made a low sound of approval and sinks into your touch. “That so?”

“Yeah, it feels Hh really- Hh’iiishiew!”

“Aww bless, do you feel worst then last night baby?” You ask as your thumbs go to graze her temples again. Natasha hums agreeably and shifts her position to press into the touch, prompting to you give a sympathetic pout as she sniffles.

“Maybe you should go lay down?” You offered, sliding down from to table to pull her into a tight hug.

“I can't just rest go lay down and rest Y/N.” Natasha huffed as she buried her face in the crook of your neck and the exhaustion behind her eyes was beyond-evident when she pulled away, “what am I meant to do, put up a billboard which says ‘Sorry bad guys please don’t cause trouble today, Natasha Romanoff has a cold and isn’t well enough to kick your asses?’”

“So, you admit you're not well enough to kick ass?” You raised your eyebrow accusingly, pulling out a chair for her to sit on knowing she had just accidentally outed herself. The realisation of what she had just said finally set in and she’d shook her head, knowing there was no point in hiding it anymore.

“I could still pin you in seconds though.” She smirked back at you, as you came behind the chair she was in, reaching down to massage her shoulders.

“Care to demonstrate?” You asked as you gave her the cheesiest of winks, earning yourself a snort of laughter from the redhead.

“Maybe another time,” Natasha smiled, opting to turn around and gently pulling on your sweatshirt so you’d lean down meaning she could plant a gentle kiss on your cheek instead, “wouldn’t want you to catch this.”

You shrugged, you didn’t necessarily want to catch it either, “Worth a try, I guess.” You went to return her gesture but stopped as she turned her head away, yawning widely against her fist.

Her yawn was soon followed by an irritated sounding exhale quickly accompanied by her suddenly ducking her head down into her elbow, “Eiiishiew! Hh’htshoo! Hh..hhii’eshhiew!”

“Bless you sweetie! We should get you back up to our room,” You said, brushing your fingers down her feverish cheeks, “You look like you’re about to doze off at any moment and I'm sure our bed is alot more comfortable to nap in then these chairs.”

“I’d love too.” Natasha admitted, “but I’m on shift right now, it's not that simple.”

You clicked your tongue as you pulled out your phone, typing speedily as you texted someone. And you got your reply speedily too, “Just sorted that.”

Natasha gave you a confused look, “What do you mean?”

“I text Tony,” you explained as you waved your phone, “I just said that something came up and that you need to be covered for this shift. He agreed to take over for us.”

It was hard to miss the small smile which crept across her face as she heard your words. You knew Natasha had a hard time asking for help, so this was your way of letting her know that you were there for her.

“Now, up you get.” You smiled, holding out your hand for her to take as she stood, “we can go up to our room and nap, maybe have a nice hot bath later? I’ll even read to you if it’ll help you feel better.”

Nat smiled too, bringing up your interlocked fingers so she could press a kiss to the back of hand, “You’re seriously the best,” she paused to clear her throat while a slight blush began to spread across her cheeks, “but, y’know… I heard cuddles can cure colds quick.”

You raised an eyebrow, not holding back your smirk, “Is that so?”

“Mhm.”

“Well, I think we should go test that theory.”

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[babyloposts]

MY HERO DAD-CANNONS

Summary: How my favorite boys would react to their child having a nightmare. Some single dad head cannons because my baby fever is back

Includes: Bakugou Katsuki, Midoriya Izuku, Kaminari Denki, Takami Keigo

Warnings: none, fluff, aged up characters, references to GN parent titles

———————————————————————

Bakugou:

He was up and down the hall as quickly as the first wail left his daughter’s mouth. He was desperately hoping that the screams were not from a villain trying to kidnap her.

He was relieved for only a second as he saw her safely tucked into bed as he left her earlier that night, but the worry came back as he saw her broken out in a cold sweat.

Careful not to startle her awake Katsuki rubbed her forehead gingerly removing the sweat and bangs from its place matted on the top of her head.

“Kid. Wake up.” His tone soft. The one he reserved only for her.

“Daddy?” Her brows furrowed and her eyelashes fluttered open to see a stoic yet comforting face.

“You okay? I think you were having a nightmare. Scared the hell out of me.” He chuckled, still soothing her as her breathing slowed.

“M-me too. I was so scared Dad. The monsters were trying to get me.”

“What monsters?” Katsuki feared the worst. What if she had seen a villain and they knew she was his kid. That could mean she was being watched and in danger. He couldn’t let anything happen to her.

“From the movie dad. The one I watched when hanging out with the Midoriya’s.” Bakugou’s face scrunched and his daughter winced in fear of being in trouble for watching a PG-13 movie.

“What’d I tell you about watching scary movies with Deku’s kid. Now look at you all scared with nightmares.” Bakugou scolded, but his expression softened. He was just glad she was safe.

“I’m sorry Dad. I won’t watch scary movies anymore. I don’t want any monsters to get me.”

“It’s okay. I promise I won’t let any monsters get you. They have to go through me first, alright squirt.” She nodded and gave Bakugou a small smile, knowing she was safe and in the most capable hands of the #2 hero.

Bakugou smoothed her hair back and placed a kiss to her forehead. “Love you squirt. Sweet Dreams.”

“I love you too Dad.”

———————————————————————

Midoriya:

Izuku is no stranger to weird dreams, but he had never expected his One for All induced visions to transfer to his daughter as well.

He wouldn’t even know if she hadn’t been weeping by his bedside at one in the morning.

“D-daddy.” A small voice warbled out next to Midoriya. His eyes shot open not expecting to see a teary eyed five year old only a few inches away from his face.

“What’s wrong Bubby?” Izuku quickly sat up in bed and moved to the edge of the bed, scooping the crying child into his arms.

“I had a bad dream.” She whimpered as he wiped the tears from her eyes.

“Aww I’m sorry.” He hugged her tightly to his chest rocking slightly to soothe her. “Do you want to talk about it?”

She nodded slightly before starting. “I was so scared Daddy. You were there and somebody—a bad man—stole your quirk away from you. He was too strong. And nobody would help you. Not even All Might. And I was too little to help you, Daddy and I’m so sorry.” And just like that the tears were flowing from her tear ducts again.

Izuku shushed her and started back trying to soothe her again. “Don’t worry, I’m right here, okay? I’m not going anywhere.” He brought his daughter back to her bedroom and tucked her into her Princess themed bed. “Are you comfy?” She asked and she nodded.

Izuku gave her a kiss to her temple before getting up to move to a bookshelf on the far side of the room. “Would you like to hear a story?” She nodded and Izuku climbed into the side of the bed and wrapped his arm around her.

Midoriya read the story book to her that were more kiddie versions of some of All Might’s best missions (even in fatherhood he was a total fanboy).

His daughter was knocked before he was even halfway through the book, the tales of heroism and safety lulling her into a peaceful sleep. Although she was peaceful and very cute Izuku had realized his grave mistake far too late.

His daughter was the lightest sleeper he knew. It would be almost impossible to remove himself from the bed without waking her up.

He tried several times to stand from the bed without causing her to stir, but ultimately failed and gave in to the reality that he’d be spending the night on the edge of a twin bed.

It wasn’t the most comfortable thing in the world, but Izuku would give up anything for his little girl, even the comforts of his own bed, to make her feel safe.

———————————————————————

Kaminari:

It took a lot to get Denki up, which wasn’t always a good thing having such a young child to look after. He was finally awoken by the third kick to his ribs by a little foot in bed.

“Ouch, what the-?” Denki whipped the blanket down to reveal a small body in the fetal position hunched against his side.

“Wha- hey Little Man. What happened? Why aren’t you sleeping in your big kid bed?”

The small boy was unmoving, pretending to be asleep to prevent being bothered or moved from his comfortable position.

“I know you’re not sleep, Buddy. Tell me what’s wrong. Please?” Finally Denki’s son’s head poked up from his arm shields and showed off his pouty face.

“I don’t want to sleep in my big kid. It’s too dark and scary in there. I don’t want to have bad dreams.” The child’s eyes started to water.

Denki sighed. “Bud, I thought we agreed that when you turned four you’d stop sleeping in Papa’s bed and sleep by yourself.”

“I don’t want to anymore. I’m scared. It’s too dark and you are too far away.” He whined. Denki knew that he was the age where he needed to start being able to self-soothe and sleep by himself, but he couldn’t deny his son. He was a good kid, maybe with a bit of separation anxiety, but all around he was pretty easy.

Denki’s nanny would probably scold him for babying his son, but he didn’t care. It’s not like Denki liked sleeping alone anyway.

“Bud, you can’t sleep down in the covers like that. You’ll get way too hot.” A small smile spread over Denki’s lips as his son shuffled his way up onto Denki’s chest with his arms wrapped around his neck in a death grip.

Denki chuckled once the grip loosened and rubbed his son’s back as he slipped into sleep. “Can we try sleeping in your big kid bed tomorrow night?” Denki whispered.

“I’ll try Papa, but no promises.” Denki chuckled and closed his eyes in content.

“That’s okay Buddy. I love you.”

“Love you too, Papa.”

———————————————————————

Takami Keigo:

Keigo really hoped that an intruder wasn’t in the house right now. He knew it was irrational to think, but stranger things have happened, plus he was already worked up from the last patrol he went on last night where he fought a surprisingly difficult villain.

Stealthily Kei climbed out of bed and sent a feather flying into the kitchen where the noise was coming from to scope out the intruder.

When he heard a high pitched scream and low thud he was actually more relieved than worried.

He rushed from behind his bedroom door out to see his son sat on the ground in front of the open refrigerator.

“The hell are you doing up? It’s 2 AM!” Keigo whisper yelled to ensure he didn’t bother the neighbors.

“Sorry Dad. I was hungry.”

“What are you still hungry for? You basically ate a whole chicken by yourself for dinner. At this rate keeping up with your eating habits cost more than the rent.” Takami chided, but he couldn’t be too mad, his son was a growing boy and they needed their sustenance.

“I’m sorry Dad. I just woke up and wanted a snack that’s all.” That’s what he said, but the glossiness in his son’s eyes gave him away.

Keigo bent over to pick up the food that had fallen out of the fridge and grab a carton of ice cream out of the freezer along with two spoons. His son watched his father intently as he moved to the kitchen island to sit and patted the stool next to him.

“Come sit down and have your snack.” Keigo sighed. Reluctantly his son sat down beside him and grabbed a spoon scooping into the slightly freezer burnt cookies and cream.

“So tell me what’s really going on. You wouldn’t tear up just from me knocking you on your ass earlier.” His son’s eyes grew wide, surprised that his dad had noticed that small detail.

“There’s nothing wrong.”

“I know when you’re lying to me Kid. So just go ahead and tell me.” Kei said wrapping an arm around his son’s shoulders.

He took a deep breath before finally caving. “I... I had a dream about Baba. When they died.” Keigo’s usual cocky demeanor faded away and his eyes softened as he recalled the painful memory.

“Wow.” Keigo said as he cleared his throat. “That uh... hasn’t happened for a while. I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault Dad. I just wished... I don’t know. I just miss them a lot.” He began to tear up again. Keigo sighed. It has been almost seven years since his significant other died tragically from cancer. Their son was just a kid then. What Five year old can really comprehend that and grieve a parent properly. Since then Kei’s been doing his best as a single Dad, but maybe he should have talked about them more.

“I know you miss them Kid. I do too. I miss them everyday, but you remind me of them. You’ve got the same face and spirit they had, so it’s like a little piece of ‘em is always with us. They’re in you.” Keigo’s grip tightened around his son’s shoulder and he left a comforting rub up and down his forearm.

“I know sayin all this isn’t going to bring them back, but just know they’re always in your heart and they loved you very much.”

“Thanks Dad.”

“No problem Kid. Just finish your ice cream and get to bed. I don’t want you late for school in the morning.”

His son nodded. Keigo stood from the island and ruffled the hair of his son before depositing his dirty spoon in the sink. Before he made it all the way to his bedroom a voice rang out behind him.

“I love you Dad.”

Keigo smiled softly. “Love you too Kid.”

[intoanothermind]

Stand Tall - Reggie

Word Count: 7.8k

- Reggie x reader

Synopsis: your younger sister joins a band of ghosts, but she’s not the only one who can see them. You’ve seen them since you were a child.

Masterlist

Flying Solo - Reggie imagine

Akai Ito - Reggie imagine (soulmate au)

Bright - Luke imagine

—

I took a deep breath and smiled before leaving the taxi. A month with many projects and exams in college made me spend a lot of time away from my family. When that happened, I used to spend time with a friend who lived closer to campus. But now that I didn’t have to worry so much for a few more weeks until the next round of tests, I can finally take a breath and enjoy some family time between classes. I smiled discreetly at the elderly woman who was always across the street, watching her daughter. She flashed a huge smile back at me before disappearing.

“Papa?“ I asked out loud, opening the door.

I heard a noise coming from the kitchen and Dad appeared already coming towards me with a huge smile. “Mi hija! How was the tests? When will there be more?”

“Are you already trying to kick me out again?“ I laughed, accepting his tight hug. “Don’t worry, I have one more month before the final exams for the semester. Where are Carlos and Julie?”

"Carlos is still in school and Julie is rehearsing in the studio.”

My smile widened and a weight lifted from my chest. I was happy that Julie finally got back to connecting with the music after mom died. It wasn’t easy for any of us, but it was especially difficult for her. When Flynn told me on one of the last calls about Julie - two years younger than me - playing again and even joining a band, I was really happy. I could always count on my sister’s best friend to keep me informed in the smallest details.

“So is she really playing again? I will leave my things in my room and go and talk to her. ”

“No, no. Let me take your backpack, go and see your sister.”

“Gracias, papa.” I gave him a kiss on the cheek and went out again through the door to go around the house and get to the studio installed in the garage.

I heard music coming from inside, but I frowned when I heard several instruments and male voices mixed with my sister’s. The song was already over when I opened the door. Julie was talking to three boys that I had never seen in my life before. A tall, blond man had drumsticks in his hand and rolled them in the air. One with brown hair in a cap was talking to my sister with a twinkle in his eye. But the one who caught my attention the most was the pale, black-haired boy who was playing with a bass a little further away. Was that the band? I didn’t even know that Julie could talk to cute boys without stuttering.

“Am I interrupting something? I can come back later.”

The boys opened their eyes wide and looked at Julie as she turned to me a little scared and with a awkward smile on her lips.

“Y/N, hi! I didn’t know you were going to get home today! ”

I looked at her with a frown. She was acting stranger than usual.

"Yes, you did, Julie, I told you last week and called dad yesterday.”

She widened her eyes even more when she noticed my expression.

“Why don’t we go to your room then and you tell me how is college? Have you done many articles? Did you pass the exams?”

Julie walked past me and headed for the gate, ignoring the boys completely.

“Okay, this is getting weird. Jules, aren’t you going to introduce me to your friends?”

The blonde let the stick fall on his face, the cap choked and the cute guy let the bass out of tune when he let his fingers fall. All of them, including Julie, looked at me with wide eyes.

“Can she see us?" the boy in the cap asked when Julie returned to his side.

"Why wouldn’t I see you?" I looked into the eyes of the three of them and that’s when I noticed the aura around them, a little blurry, an aura that I learned to recognize after a few years. “Sure, Julie and the phantoms. You are ghosts ”

"That was quick." commented the cute bass player.

“First the band’s name makes it kinda obvious. Second, Jules wasn’t the first person in the family to talk to ghosts.”

"Y/N…” Julie looked at me with an emotion in her eyes that I couldn’t figure out. "Does that mean grandma was really at the house when we were younger?“

I smiled a little sadly. Our parents were always understandable and tried to help us with everything, but when I said I talked to grandma, even after a year after her death, they had to take me to therapy. After a while, I simply learned to lie to Dr. Turner and say that I no longer saw the dead, I just made imaginary friends.

“Yes, but I haven’t seen her in years. Ms. Elliot, however, is still in the garden across the street watching over her daughter.”

"This is so cool!" exclaimed the man in the cap, approaching.

“Another lifer seeing us? Yeah!" the blonde smiled, also approaching along with the bassist.

Julie took my arm before I could introduce myself. "Y/N… Mom…?”

The weight on my shoulders returned and I sighed before I smiled at her, holding her hand in mine.

“She stayed here just long enough to ask me to look after you, dad and Carlos and say that she loved us very much.”

For a second I thought Julie would let the tears fall, but then she took a deep breath and passed her hand under her eyes to compose herself.

“Thank you, Y/N.”

“You still need to introduce me to your cute friends. I thought you couldn’t talk to pretty boys without being ashamed.”

The bassist broke into a silly smile and patted the blonde on the shoulder. "She said that we are cute and pretty.“

"Reggie…” The blonde shook his head before turning to me. “Sorry about… him. I’m Alex and these are Reggie and Luke.”

~*~ 

The past few days have been… a little bit strange. Well, for starters my subjects, despite having relaxed a little, I still have work to do. And while I’m at home, it’s difficult to organize hours of study and free time with taking care of three teenage ghosts. Julie was right - watching three kids who seemed to share the same brain cell is harder than it looks.

“Aren’t you going to give yourself a break?”

I was startled to see dad behind me, almost knocking over the glass that was still in my hand.

“The plan was to come and drink water and take my five-minute break.”

Dad made a face. “Good luck in studies, mi hija, but don’t forget to take a few more breaks. We don’t want you to fry that smart mind, do we? ”

I broke into a faint smile when Dad placed a kiss on my forehead before walking away. I sighed, getting ready for a few more hours of reading before heading up the stairs again to my room. When I got there, however, I stopped at the portal and went in quickly to close the door.

“What are you doing here?" I asked in whispers to the ghosts that were scattered around my room.

Alex was sitting on a purple puff next to the desk where Luke was sitting in the chair that usually sits opposite her. He had his head thrown behind, looking bored. Reggie was lying on the left side of my bed, looking tired.

"Julie kicked us out of her room." explained Luke, getting up and heading for my bookcase.

"Please don’t kick us out either." Reggie said with puppy eyes that he knew I couldn’t resist.

"Luke, stop messing with Y/N’s stuff!" scolded Alex and that’s when I realized that Luke was looking through one of the books he picked up on the shelf.

"It’s alright. Feel free to borrow any book you like.” I assured him, going to sit on the right side of the bed, where most of my stuff was spread out. "And you can stay, just don’t make too much noise, I need to study.”

“What do you study?" asked Alex.

"How long have you been studying?" asked Reggie and I laughed.

"I’m in my first year of journalism.”

“Nice." said Luke, sitting back in his chair and concentrating on the book.

"Well, now I need to concentrate." I said, lifting Reggie’s head that was on top of one of the printed articles I needed to read. I put his head back on the pillow and fluffed some of his black hair, hoping it looked like just a casual movement.

"Wow, what did you just do?!" Alex exclaimed, sitting upright on the puff.

"What did I do?" I asked with wide eyes and a racing heart at the possibility that he noticed.

"You touched him!”

“You really did!" exclaimed Reggie, holding my hand again.

"Oh, that." I sighed, relieved. “I always managed to touch ghosts. That’s why it took me so long to discover that I was the only one who saw them. ”

Luke and Alex remained wide-eyed, but Reggie just lay down again and put my hand back in his hair.

"I liked.”

While I fiddled with Reggie’s black hair with one hand, I used the other to lift the text up to my face to hide my red cheeks from the other boys. Gradually I ended up distracting myself, fiddling with Reggie’s hair as I read the text and made markings and notes. When my eyes started to weigh and my vision was blurred even with the glasses, I decided it was time to sleep. It wouldn’t do any good to try to study tired because my brain wouldn’t absorb it. I looked around when I realized that the boys had been silent for far too long. They were all asleep. Alex was huddled on the puff, Luke was hunched over the open book and Reggie’s head was bent toward my hand.

I smiled. They really looked adorable that way. I set my stuff down on the night-stand and stood up carefully so as not to wake Reggie. I lifted his head slightly to put a pillow under it. I took blankets from the closet and covered all three, remembering to take the book out from under Luke and marking the page he stopped with a piece of paper and left it beside him. I left the room trying to make as little noise as possible. I crossed the hall and sighed with relief when I saw that Julie was still awake.

“Hi sis." I whispered, getting her attention.

Julie looked up from her cell phone and smiled at me. She looked ready to go to sleep.

"Y/N!”

I broke into a smile. "Can I sleep here with you today?“

"Usually I’m the one to go to your room to ask for it." she laughed.

"Well, turns out that today my room is infested with ghosts.”

She snorted. "They are getting too loose.“

"I don’t really care." I said, shrugging my shoulders. "I wouldn’t have minded sleeping there as well, but Reg took up much of the space in the bed and it would be weird.”

Julie giggled and looked at me with a mischievous gleam in her eyes.

“Shut up!" I said warningly before she could say anything. "I don’t want to hear a comment about that.”

“Okay, okay." she raised her hands in surrender before moving to one side of the bed and lifting the bedspread inviting me to join her.

As soon as we settled down I watched my younger sister’s serene face.

"I’m glad you met them." I said quietly. "They do you good.”

“They do." she sighed. “And I’m glad you met them, too. They seem to like you. ”

I like them too." I said smiling slightly. “Although I don’t play like you do, I like to know that I also made friends with them. I also like to think that they will be here to take care of you when dad or I aren’t around. ”

"But I will always need my older sister around." she said quickly. "Besides, you made a promise to mom.”

I laughed lightly.

“That I did it and I intend to keep it, Jules.”

I approached her and hugged her. We sleep in that same position.

 ~*~

I arrived at the band’s presentation site with Julie and went straight to meet Flynn. She looked anxious.

“Am I too late?” Asked Julie, taking the backpack off her back.

“Too early.” Replied Flynn. "Hi, Y/N.”

“Hi, Flynn! Glad we got there early. Distracting tía y Carlos while Julie went down the window was not as easy as it seems.” I commented, laughing to remember how I needed to distract our brother with a little ghost story.

The next performance was announced and the audience applauded as we watched Carrie take the stage in a shiny silver outfit and pink wig. I opened my eyes wide, trying to keep my face from turning into a frown.

“I never thought she was going to take this little group forward." I commented.

"I envy that you finished school before you had to see this." replied Flynn, tossing the braids over his shoulder.

“Hope you all came to have a great time.” Carrie said from the stage and put on reflective glasses, also pink.

“Dirty Candy? How’d she get on the list?” asked Julie.

“Her daddy probably made a call.” replied Flynn, pursing his lips. "I like this! Pretty flower.” she pointed to the vest that Julie wore and I realized I recognized it.

"Thanks. It’s dahlia. My mom’s favourite.”

Carrie started to sing and four other girls also came on stage. I raised my eyebrows, wondering how I got to a Barbie pop show. I felt the air stirring around me and noticed that Luke and Reggie appeared on one side and Alex on the other, all paying attention to Carrie. Alex, however, looked a little uneasy and I held back the smile when I realized why.

“Alex." I whispered, trying not to get too much attention from the people around me. "Go on, I know you want to.”

I didn’t even got an answer. He just disappeared from my side and appeared on stage among the girls. Julie looked at us behind her and Reggie shrugged while I just smiled. Alex looked confused for two seconds before he started dancing behind Carrie. In the chorus, he disappeared from the stage and appeared again beside me, slamming his fist on mine discreetly in greeting.

“You having fun out there?” asked Julie

Alex coughed a little, trying to hide it. "It’s not my fault. It’s my, hm… It’s my feet.”

“Yeah." Julie replied, raising her eyebrow. Reggie and Luke, on my other side, just looked at Alex smiling.

“Put me back in, coach.”He said before disappearing to the stage again.

“Oh, it’s the guys.” Julie explained to Flynn when she turned to us, confused.

"Alex is dancing with the girls and is so much better than Carrie." I detailed it a little more, making her laugh when imagining the scene. "My boy is rocking up there." I commented with a bit of drama, laying my head on Reggie’s shoulder without caring about people watching me interact with the air. "I so wish I could have that on video.”

“You look like a mom." commented Reggie, laughing.

"What can I say, the three of you just make me so proud." I joked, wiping my eyes as if I were drying a tear. But Reggie looked at me with a strange twinkle in his eye, but before I could ask anything, the song ended and we turned to the stage in time to see Alex doing a little jumping around saying something about blushing.

He came up beside me again, trying to hide it. “Hey. I was just… I was just doing that for you guys.”

I patted him on the shoulder in support while Reggie said, playfully. “Yeah, you can stop smiling now.“

“I’m not gonna lie. That was… kind of good.” Julie said and I clicked my tongue.

"Wow, Jules, I thought you were supposed to be the smart one in the band." I ignored the boys’ protests on hearing this. “The good part of the presentation nobody else could see, unfortunately.”

“Yeah. I forgot why I hate her so much.” replied Flynn.

Carrie and the other girls got off the stage and came towards us.

"Hi, girls. Um, isn’t it past your bedtime?”She said to my sister and her friend.

“Now I remember.”

“If you’re looking for Nick, he didn’t come.”Carrie continued on to Julie, who simply stepped forward confidently.

“That’s not why I’m here.“

As if waiting for a cue, the presenter introduced the band. But as Julie and the Fat Ones. I couldn’t help laughing at the face Luke made.

"Really?” asked Alex, with a grimace.

"Yeah, man. My handwriting sucks.” Luke tried to apologize.

"Next time, Alex will sign up." I said, trying to look casual.

Julie passed Carrie’s group straight to the stage. The expression on Carrie’s face was priceless when she walked away from us. Flynn left shortly after to turn on the projector - just for the sake of effect. Julie sat down in front of the keyboard and said the correct name for the band.

"Good luck, boys." I said, holding Reggie’s hand quickly and discreetly before going after Flynn.

The lighting focused on Julie and I felt my heart fill with pride. It was the first time I had seen my sister perform after mom died and I knew it was worth the punishment dad would give me if he found out that I helped her escape from home. When she started to sing, I accompanied the music by whispering softly through my teeth. After watching the rehearsals so much, Finally Free's lyrics stuck to my mind and as the notes went up I felt the music reverberating in my body. When the boys appeared on stage playing and people in the audience stood up, I felt like jumping for joy.

It was great to see people enjoying their work. It didn’t matter if they think they’re holograms - they’ve got a second chance to do what they love and to see them there at ease and full of energy is comforting. All four played with their soul and their stage chemistry was incredible. Especially from Julie and Luke. I didn’t need that Flynn me whispering over there they’re into to each other - the intensity of the look when sharing the microphone was obvious. Alex and Reggie also noticed the exchange of looks they had. What really shocked me, however, was when shortly after Reggie turned to me and winked at me. I choked on the lyrics I whispered to accompany Julie and did my best to keep my cheek from blushing. Flynn obviously noticed and laughed at me. The song ended, the boys disappeared again and the audience gasped.

“Thank you, we are Julie and the Phantoms. Tell your friends.”Julie said goodbye and got off the stage. I couldn’t help laughing when I noticed how she took Reggie’s phrase.

"Let’s meet them at the counter." I called Flynn, who quickly put the projector in his backpack and followed me.

Julie came to find us and quickly hugged Flynn.

“You were incredible!”Flynn said.

I soon hugged Julie too.

“Yeah, we were.”I heard Reggie behind me and turned to see him standing next to Alex and Luke, who were sitting at the counter.

"If it weren’t weird, I would give you a hug now." I said to them, trying to look discreet. "I loved the presentation!”

“I’ll charge you for my hug later." said Alex, making the boys laugh.

"Okay." I assured you.

"Hey!" interrupted Luke, pointing to someone behind us. “Whoever Carrie was trying to impress is coming this way.”

“She looks all business.”Commented Alex when we saw a woman with curly hair and a suit coming towards us.

“Wait, who should do the talking?” asked Reggie.

So cute, but also so dork.

“Okay, Julie. Julie.” he corrected himself.

“You got this.” Encouraged Luke.

"I can help you with it if needed." I whispered to Julie just before the woman arrived and offered Julie a hand.

"Hi, I’m Andi Parker, and I would- ”

“Julie. Y/N. ” a voice behind the woman took our attention.

It was dad.

“Shit." I swore under my breath.

~*~ 

Whenever I had some free time I went down to the garage to watch the band rehearsal. It was amazing the connection they had and how they gave their soul to the music. Julie and Luke singing together with everything they had, Reggie focused on his bass and Alex moving his head to the beat of his drums. It was an incredible sight, but also one that always squeezed my heart to the point that I needed to go back to my room before they finished a song to prevent the lump in my throat from dissolving into tears. I always wanted to have that connection that mom and Julie had with music, but I was never able to play anything and I certainly didn’t know how to sing. And now not only has she reconnected with mom in a way that I could never do, but she has also found something in common with three amazing boys.

At those times, when the tightness in my heart was too strong, I would lock myself in the bedroom, in the most absolute silence. I took out my notebook with notes. When I was younger, I used to try to at least compose a song, but after a while it became notes for a story. Music and books have always been my passions and if I couldn’t go on with one, why not try the other? Not that I would ever get the courage to publish something, but I liked to imagine that I would have some material for that.

"What are you doing?”

I let out a scream that certainly didn’t make me proud. I turned and realized that Reggie had appeared beside me on the bed - completely thrown on the mattress and with his arms behind his head. I tried to control my heart a little to respond.

“I thought you had a rehearsal.”

“I thought you were there watching us. When we took a break and didn’t see you there, I came to see how you were.” he shrugged, as if it was nothing much. "What are you doing?“

"Just a few thrown ideas." I replied, trying to sneak up on the notebook, but Reggie took it out of my hands before I could do it.

"This is for a book, isn’t it?" he asked, in a serious tone that I never saw him using. I just nodded. “Y/N, this is incredible! It makes me want to read. ”

I laughed softly, before asking. "Are you serious?”

“Yes! Why don’t you try to publish something? ”

I scratched the back of the neck, a little uncomfortable. "Well, I never thought I was going to be talented at anything.”

“How so?" he sat up, tilting his head so that I could look into his blue eyes. I was breathless for a moment.

“I really wanted to know how to make music, but when I realized I couldn’t do it, I tried to create stories where I could. But I never even thought it would be worth publishing. ”

“I think you should try. I would definitely read it. ” he said, opening a beautiful crooked smile. "Why do you do journalism when you could try to be a writer?”

“Because while I don’t have neither the material nor the courage, I can write other people’s real stories." I replied, taking my notebook back from his hands. I turned around to put the notebook and pen in my hand back on the night-stand. "What do you think about watching a movie?" I suggested .

"Yes! There are a lot of things that I still need to catch up to.” Reggie commented, lying back on the bed and making himself comfortable.

I tried not to blush as I got up to get my laptop. “We can see the Star Wars movies that you haven’t seen. We can skip the scene where Han Solo dies, no problem, I’ve seen them a couple times.”

"Would you do that for me?" he had a childlike gleam in his eye that made me laugh a little.

"Move over.”

We settled next to each other on the bed. I put the first movie on the laptop in my lap and we started the marathon. I barely noticed when I fell asleep on Reggie’s shoulder.

 ~*~

A few days later I was lying on the couch trying to complete a story that I had to deliver in two days. Reggie was sitting next to my dad at the table in the other room and none of them seemed to have noticed me there in the next room. I even thought about getting up to concentrate on the room, but I loved how Reggie tried to interact with dad. It was funny - and very cute. Alex came up and started talking to Reggie too. But when I heard Carlos’ voice, things became really interesting. I remained lying down, but I paid more attention to the conversation when Carlos commented about the house being haunted by ghosts who had a dream, but that dream was interrupted by a tragic accident.

“Our house is being haunted by a very talented… chef. ”I could hear the boys’ sigh of relief, but I had to cover my mouth to keep from laughing.

“Looks like someone fell asleep watching Ghosts Hunters and Chopped.“

I had to hold my laughter even more when Carlos started talking about a sauce recipe and Reggie commenting that he was like my dad. I made a face at the thought that I liked a guy who said he looked like my dad. It wasn’t very difficult for my little brother to convince dad to make the French dip - it’s not like he doesn’t like food.

I lifted my head and realized that Dad closed his laptop and left. I prepared to do the same when I heard Alex and Reggie’s conversation.

"I will miss them.”

“I hope you’re not thinking about looking for someone else’s garage." I joked, but feeling tight in my chest.

They both started, looking at me wide-eyed as I approached the table.

"Y/N… hey…” Reggie tried to hide it, but I could see in their eyes that something was bothering them.

But I knew they weren’t going to tell me, so I needed to find out another way. I would have to do an investigation. I’m glad I had some sources between the ghosts.

“Well, I need to go out for an interview with a source." It wasn’t quite a lie. "Don’t do anything stupid, boys.”

I squeezed Alex’s shoulder lightly and leaned down to kiss Reggie’s cheek before leaving. I left the house so quickly that I didn’t have to worry about hiding my burning cheeks. I also didn’t notice their reaction. I was on a mission to find my favourite skater.

~*~ 

When I returned home, I could almost feel the tears stubbornly leaving. But I swallowed the tears, because I needed to talk to Julie about what to do. I wasn’t even sure if she already knew about the boys’ situation or not, but we couldn’t leave them suffering like that. I couldn’t leave them suffering that way. I looked for it in the garage first. If my sister wasn’t there, at least I would have a chance to talk to them.

“Someone once told me that you don’t ask for permission. You book gigs by doing.”Julie was saying when I showed up at the half-open gate.

The boys were lying on the couch and on the floor, looking depressed, while Julie was standing in front of them, as if giving a lecture. Alex had the drumsticks in his hands and Reggie was hugging his bass.

“That was me.”Reggie said with a little smile on his face.

“No, it wasn’t.” denied Julie and Luke.

“Yes, it was.” Reggie grunted, looking down.

"This isn’t over.” continued Julie, ignoring him. “We were brought together for a reason. To help each other.”

“Yeah, but like Luke said… People don’t just play at the Orpheum because they want to.”Said Alex.

“People don’t.” I said, drawing their attention. “But ghosts do.“

Julie turned a little scared to me. From the look she gave me, I think my expression showed all the sadness I was feeling.

"All you need is to haunt them in a different way." I suggested, taking a deep breath to control my emotions. “In a few days Panic! At The Disco will play with a not very famous band that will arrive here almost at the last minute because they will be doing a show in Las Vegas. You just need to make sure that they don’t arrive on time and that you’re the best option.”

For a few seconds they were processing this and I used it as my cue to get out of there before they saw my tears pooling in my eyes. I couldn’t afford to be selfish. They needed to make the move before the only option left for them is to join Caleb. I heard Reggie’s voice calling me, but I ignored him and continued on my way to the house. But even before I crossed the space between the gate and the stone path to the smaller gate, I felt a hand pulling on my wrist.

"Y/N…” Reggie said quietly looking at me with those blue eyes full of emotion. “I don’t like it when you cry. I’m sorry.“

I laughed softly. I hadn’t realized that some tears had came out.

"No need to apologize. I understand that you need to do this. It’s just…” I took a deep breath, trying not to choke. “It hurts to think that I will have to lose someone else. Especially someone who has become so important to me. I mean, the three of you have become very important to me.”

"You have become very important to us too." Reggie said, still holding my hand. “You have become important to me. I’ll miss you.”

I didn’t think before throwing my arms around his shoulders and hugging him tightly against me. He tensed for a few moments before hugging my waist with the same intensity. And we stayed there, saying nothing, just enjoying what could be our last hug.

“Reggie, we have to think of a plan!" we heard Luke shouting from the garage and Alex scolding him saying something about giving up a little space.

I took a deep breath before letting go of his comforting embrace. I placed a kiss on her pale cheek, this time longer than the one from earlier.

"Go. They need you.”

Reggie opened his mouth to say something, but I quickly turned and went home with tears streaming down my cheeks.

 ~*~ 

I was quite nervous as we waited to find out if the plan had worked. But while I just waited sitting on the sofa in the garage, with the occasional twitch in my leg, Julie was in front of me pacing and making my nerves worse.

"Julie, I love you, but stop walking before I need to tie you to the couch!" I exclaimed.

"Sorry, I’m nervous." she said, continuing to pace.

"I know! And it’s making me nervous!”

The boys suddenly appeared in front of us and Julie went into an outbreak, asking so many questions at once that I almost couldn’t keep up.

“That’s a lot of questions!” exclaimed Reggie, interrupting her. “Luke, do you wanna take this one?”

“Take a seat.” instructed Luke.

“Finally." I mumbled, pulling Julie by the arm to sit next to me.

“It’s fine, everything is fine.” continued Luke, approaching the low table in front of us and leaning on it with the other boys.

“Yeah. You should be getting a call right .. now!” said Alex, taking an effect break and pointing the boys at Julie’s cell phone on the table. But the screen remained off. After a few uncomfortable seconds, with me trying to keep from laughing at Alex’s disappointed face, he tried again. “Okay. Right… Now!”

The phone finally rang and Julie screamed.

“Nailed it.” said Alex, holding out his hand for Luke and Reggie to touch.

But Julie didn’t answer. "Answer it, Jules!" I shouted along with the boys.

She put it on speaker.

“Hi, this is Tasha from the Orpheum in Hollywood.”

That’s when one of the best scenes I’ve ever seen started. Julie jumped on the couch, almost stepping on me, while Alex jumped across the table towards the armchair and Reggie and Luke celebrated with a strange dance. Julie opened her arms when the woman spoke again and everyone stopped like statues watching her pick up her cell phone. And while Julie jumped on the table to answer Tasha, Alex jumped into the arms of the boys, who held him in the air.

“I’m swimming!” exclaimed Alex, waving his arms, and that’s when I let out a loud laugh.

The boys put Alex on the floor and Reggie came over to me. I looked at her confused, until he took my hands and pulled me until I was on my feet. A second later, I was in his tight embrace. He even got up and spun me around. I just prayed that he couldn’t hear my heartbeat. When my feet returned to the ground, I noticed that Alex and Luke were watching us. I motioned for them to join us and joined them in a group hug.

“I missed hugs." Alex commented when we parted.

"Own, you can always ask me for hugs, you big baby." I said, hugging him tight again. He hugged me with the same intensity.

I noticed, over Alex’s shoulder, Julie looking at us with a smile on her face. I smiled at her when I pulled myself out of Alex’s arms and went over to her, squeezing her in a hug too.

"I’m so proud of you, Jules." I whispered softly in his ear.

Her only answer was to tighten me more in her embrace.

~*~ 

I stayed with Julie in the dressing room the entire time. We were both nervous, but we managed to calm down a little when Flynn arrived after preparing some effects on the projector. But nothing came out of my head that the boys could be in trouble to take so long to show up.

"Y/N, you’re starting to make me nervous, too." said Flynn, and only then did I realize I was pacing up and down in front of the couch, just like Julie had done that morning.

"Sorry, it’s just…” I tried to explain, forcing myself to sit on the couch and stay still.

“We understand." said Flynn, holding my hand.

"I just wish that today wasn’t their last night here." I sighed, propping myself up and elbows on my knees and letting all the weight fall on my shoulders.

"Y/N." Julie called me and waited for me to look her in the eye before continuing. "You like Reggie, don’t you?”

I gave a sad smile and nodded, unable to find my voice.

“Called it!" exclaimed Flynn, pointing at me and making us laugh a little. "The Molina family seems to have a thing for ghosts, it’s impressive.”

Julie rolled her eyes, but ignored it. "You should talk to him before they cross over.“

"And are you going to talk to Luke about your feelings?" Flynn muttered and I pointed out to her nodding in agreement.

"I wanted to talk to Reggie about it, so as not to carry that regret the rest of my life, but… I’m afraid of the reaction.”

“He likes you.”

“Totally." agreed Flynn.

I sighed. "I need him to have a little more time then so that I can say something.”

Julie opened her eyes wide and got up from the couch to take my place walking back and forth.

“Now you broke your sister.”

We heard a knock on the door and the technician called Julie, saying it was time for her to enter the stage.

But the boys had not yet appeared.

“Just a second.”Julie shouted at the door and approached us. "Something’s wrong. The boys were getting those jolts pretty bad as I was leaving. And they wouldn’t stand me up again.”

I sniffed, following her thought. I felt paralysed.

“They must have run out of time.“

“I’m so sorry, Jules.” murmured Flynn.

“They didn’t cross over.”Continued Julie, but I felt like everything around me was fading. "They’re gone. And I didn’t even get to say goodbye.”

I couldn’t help a sob that escaped my lips. I saw Flynn getting up and hugging Julie, but then the technician shouted at her again and the two of them ran out the door. However, I couldn’t do anything, just stand there, paralysed. My thoughts hammered in my mind, but I could only think that those three boys were gone forever without having the opportunity to make the passage. Those goofs that won me and my sister over and made a huge difference in our lives. And we would never see him again.

“Y/N. Y/N! ” it took me a while to notice Flynn shaking my shoulders. I had to blink a few times to see her through tears. "Julie ran to the alley behind Orpheum, you need to talk to her.“

"I… I…” I took a deep breath. Even though I wanted to just break up there, I couldn’t. My sister needed me. "Okay, okay.“

I got up and followed Flynn’s instructions as to where Julie had run. I opened the side doors and found her crying in the middle of the alley with a flower in her hand.��A dahlia. Mom’s favourite.

"Jules." I whispered as I approached. She stood up for me, a little scared, but a second later she threw herself into my arms and hugged me tightly, as if only that hug kept her from collapsing. I held her even tighter against me. “Breathe, sweetie. Julie, I think you should sing.”

She released me a little and looked at me confused. I dried her tears a little - mine - before speaking.

“It would be a beautiful tribute to mom and boys. They lived, died and continued the life of ghosts through music. They would like that. That’s what I would do if I had your talent.”

“Thank you, Y/N. Really." said Julie, smiling a little before hugging again and entering.

But I didn’t go straight in. I took a few deep breaths, trying to calm myself down so that I was emotional enough to hear her singing without the boys. When I went in again and joined Flynn next to the coach near the stage, Julie finished a speech and sat down in front of the keyboard to begin. I already felt my heart squeeze again when she started the first chords. The song approached the first chorus and I took a deep breath, murmuring the words between my lips. It was when Alex’s drums came up that I felt my heart stop. A few seconds later Reggie appeared in a red and black suit playing his bass. I felt a sob tear through my throat and put my hand over my mouth. I felt Flynn holding my free hand and hugging me to the side, as if she knew I needed that support to keep me standing.

Luke started to appear, but he was fading and coming back. I opened my eyes wide, worried, but then he came back singing and he didn’t disappear again and I could only smile and cry, excited. Alex sang a few lines and Reggie followed shortly after. I didn’t take my eyes off him, absorbing him as much as I could before he disappeared again. Our eyes met and he winked at me, opening his smile wider and I smiled back. It didn’t matter if I didn’t have time to tell him everything I needed. He was there, on that stage, together with his friends, his family, fulfilling the dream that he cannot fulfil while he was alive. My heart broke when they finished playing and the boys were gone, but the shadow of a smile remained on my lips knowing that they crossed and could rest in peace.

~*~

Dad, Carlos and Julie were walking home in front of me. They sang the chorus of Stand Tall excitedly, but as much as I wanted to participate in that moment with them, I couldn’t. I wasn’t as strong as Julie and she realized that I wasn’t well, as she always pulled dad’s attention back to them when he tried to get me to join them.

“You and your phantoms were unbelievable tonight.”Dad said when we stopped on the porch.

"I’m going up to my room, I have a headache." I made some excuse when I passed them. However, I made sure to stop in front of Julie and hug her tight. “You were incredible, Jules. I’m so proud.”

“What is it with her?" I could hear Carlos asking as I opened the door.

"Leave her be, Carlos." I hear Julie responding in a light tone of voice as I enter and leave them outside still. "She had a rough day.”

I locked myself in my room and quickly changed my clothes for a sweatshirt set before throwing myself on the bed. I stared at the ceiling, trying to keep the tears that continued to fall, but it seemed impossible. Now that I was alone, it felt like a whirlwind of emotions was falling upon me. I don’t know how much time I spent in that catatonic state before I heard a noise inside the room. It was the same noise as when the boys teleported. I sat up quickly, looking around hopefully. My heart almost stopped when I saw Reggie still in his red suit shyly approaching the bed.

“Reg?" my voice failed, as did my line of reasoning.

I was dreaming. There was no other explanation.

"Hi, Y/N." he waved his hand in that cute way that only he knew how to do. But I was still paralysed, looking at him with wide eyes. He started to speak nervously. “Well, it seems that playing at the Orpheum wasn’t our unfinished business, so the boys and I disappeared into the garage to let you and Julie think we had crossed over, but then she went into the garage and tried to get us to Caleb’s club. But of course we weren’t going, so she managed to hug Luke, he started to shine, we started to shine when we hugged them too and Julie said that you were here alone and practically-”

I hardly understood a word he said. But it helped my brain to understand that it wasn’t just my imagination. I interrupted him before I could finish speaking. I just jumped out of bed, took his face in my hands and kissed him. It was as if all the weight in the world came off my shoulders and I could melt right there. I didn’t care that he was a ghost, I didn’t care that Caleb could go after them, I didn’t care that they would one day have to find out what their unfinished business was and needed to cross over to the other side and I cared even less that my tears were mixed with his. All I cared about at that moment was the feel of his lips against mine and his arms around my waist pulling me closer to him.

I just leaned away when I needed air.

"That was nice." he commented in a thin, choked voice. I realized that he still had his eyes closed and I smiled at the expression he had on his face. "Can we do this again?”

I laughed softly before pulling him back in for another kiss. I was lost in his smell, his taste and his touch. I hardly noticed the teleportation noise in the room again.

“Y/N, we came here to… Wow!”

Reggie and I walked away again and saw Alex and Luke near my closet, both blushing and embarrassed.

“Really, guys?" Reggie asked, not only keeping his arms around my waist but pulling me even closer. "Right now?”

“We came to see how you were doing, but you look busy." said Luke, scratching the back of his neck. I was struggling to keep myself from laughing.

"We’ll be back later." said Alex simply, taking Luke’s arm and making them both disappear quickly.

I looked back at Reggie, who was already looking at me with a silly smile on his face.

"Where were we?" I asked with a mischievous smile on my lips as I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and played with a few strands of his hair.

"I think you can remind me." he said, leaning over and kissing me again.

[massivedrickhead]

Bechloe Week 2021 - Day 5

July 30th: “You don’t know who I am, do you?”

Read on AO3

This is heavy heavy angst. It’s pretty sad (imo) and also kinda long. So, you know, read at your own risk.

-

With a throbbing in her hip, and a tight pain across her chest, Beca eased herself out of the cab she’d taken, and looked up at the entrance to Barden Nursing Home.

Although she visited several times a week, it seemed like they added more stairs each time she came.

“Can I give you a hand ma’am?”

“Well that depends, Raheem,” Beca said. Her voice wasn’t as strong as it had once been, but anyone who knew her could still detect the bite of sarcasm that filled almost every sentence. “Are you going to call me ma’am again, or are you going to call me Beca?”

Raheem smiled at her from his driver side window.

“Come on Mrs Mitchell, I can’t call you that. What would my grandmother say if she knew I was disrespecting my elders?”

Beca laughed and shook her head. “If you insist.” She held out an arm for him to take, and he left his cab immediately.

Truthfully, she didn’t think she’d make it up on her own anymore.

The doctor had given her a year, give or take, but she knew her own body.

This would be her last visit to Barden Nursing Home.

“Do you want me to wait with the cab?” Raheem asked when they reached the entryway.

“No, no,” Beca said. “The girls are meeting me here, they can drive me home.”

“I’ll see you next week then?”

Probably not. “I’ll give you a call.”

Raheem was Beca’s favourite driver and he happened to be the owner of the cab company, so he always made sure he was the one to drive Beca to her destination.

His mother had been a fan of hers, he’d told her during one of their first journeys, which made her feel older than she was. Or older than she thought she was. It still surprised her when she looked in the mirror and saw an old lady looking back at her.

She didn’t really recognise herself anymore.

Now that her hair was grey, her back slightly hunched, her joints sore and swollen.

They had taken her drivers licence a few years back due to her deteriorating eyesight, and her hearing wasn’t what it was.

And now her lungs were shot. Her liver. Her heart.

Her body was failing her, worsening by the day.

She was in almost constant pain, but she still had her mind. Her mind remained as sharp as it ever was.

For that, she was grateful.

Most of the time, anyway.

Leaning on a cane, with a bunch of flowers in her other hand, she made her way through the reception area.

“Morning Beca,” one of the nurses greeted her warmly. “She’s in her room today, didn’t feel like being social.”

“Thanks hun,” Beca replied. “How is she?”

“One of her better days.”

Good, Beca thought. That’s good.

If today was going to be her last visit, she wanted it to be a good one.

She knocked on door 216, and waited for a response.

“Come in,” came a voice that was both achingly familiar yet totally alien.

“Hi,” Beca said, smiling warmly as she entered the room.

Chloe was sitting in a chair by the window, a blanket over her knees.

Her once red hair was now silver, tied in a neat ponytail. She was still looking outside, but Beca knew her bright blue eyes were now milky and flat. Clouded.

Chloe turned to face her visitor.

“Can I help you?”

Beca felt something hard lodge itself in her chest.

She would never get used to this feeling. She never wanted to get used to this feeling.

She waited for a sign of recognition. A smile or a twinkle, but there was nothing.

Chloe simply looked at her with a patient curiosity.

Well, Beca thought. That’s that, then.

“I was just wondering if you would like some company? I’m new here and I don’t really know anyone.” She placed the flowers in an empty vase of water that she knew the nurses had left there for her, like they did every time she visited.

“Yes, okay. That would be fine,” Chloe said. “I’m Chloe Beale.” She held out her hand for Beca to shake.

Beca shook it, trying not to let the stab of pain show on her face at the sound of Chloe using her maiden name.

“Beca Mitchell,” Beca said, fighting the urge to cover Chloe’s hands with both of her own.

Even after all these years, Beca still wanted nothing more than to pull Chloe into her arms and kiss her.

She couldn’t remember the last time they’d really kissed. The last time they’d lain in bed together while Chloe ran her fingers through Beca’s hair. The last time Chloe had been Chloe.

Chloe’s diagnosis and the progression of her illness had been sudden and devastating and brutally quick.

It was so cruel, Beca thought almost every minute of every day, that she still had Chloe so close yet she couldn’t have been further from her.

“I’m afraid you can’t stay too long,” Chloe said. “My daughters are coming to visit later.”

She remembers the girls, Beca thought. That’s good.

Some days Chloe had no recollection of their daughters. Some days, Chloe had no recollection of any of them.

But once in a while, God, it was so rare now, Chloe would remember Beca and who they’d been together.

“Is that so?” Beca asked. “How old are your daughters?”

“Oh, I don’t know, middle-aged-ish. One’s older than the other,” Chloe said, waving a dismissive hand. “Of an age where they think they’re old but they don’t know they’re actually still very young.”

“Hmm, they must be the same age as my kids. What are their names?”

“Well there’s Blake and, um… shoot. I had it. Begins with a B…”

No it doesn’t.

“No it doesn’t,” Chloe said, shaking her head. “Hayley.”

Riley.

“Riley!”

Beca smiled. If only I could get you to remember me so easily.

“Do you have grandkids?” Beca asked.

“No,” Chloe said with a sigh.

Yes you do. You have four, and they’re beautiful.

“Do you?”

“Yes,” Beca said. “A little too much energy for me to handle these days.”

Chloe seemed to study Beca for a fraction longer.

“You know, you look a lot like my wife. Older, of course, but there’s something about the nose and the smile…”

Beca laughed because if she didn’t she would cry. “Is that right? Well to be honest I wasn’t going to say anything, but you look a lot like my wife.”

“How weird,” Chloe said.

“She was beautiful, just like you,” Beca said, fiddling with the wedding band she still wore.

“Is she still with us?”

Beca looked into Chloe’s eyes, searching for some semblance of the Chloe Beale she had fallen in love with. Searching for a glimmer of recognition. A spark. Anything.

“No,” Beca said. “We lost her a few years ago.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Chloe said, placing her hand on Beca’s as if that’s where it was meant to be. “How awful for you. You must miss her terribly.”

Beca let out a small laugh and tears filled her eyes.

It was unbearable to mourn someone who was sitting two feet in front of you.

“More than anything. We had,” Beca swallowed hard but her voice still broke when she spoke again, “the best life together. She was my best friend… my everything.”

Chloe squeezed her hand. “How lucky you are to have felt love like that. To have loved so strongly that even after all these years you’re still…” Chloe trailed off and looked out of the window again.

“Did… is your wife still with us?” Beca asked, wiping her eyes on her sleeve.

“My… sorry, what did you say?”

“Is your wife still alive?”

“Oh, I don’t have a wife dear,” Chloe said, smiling. “This ginger is single and ready to mingle as my grandkids would say.”

Again, that knife in her heart.

Her grandkids were back, replacing her wife, and with them a spark of the old Chloe.

“Maybe you’ll meet someone here,” Beca said, the sadness taking hold of her now. Settling into her bones in the same way that the damp made her hip throb. “It’s never too late.”

“God, you’re crying, are you okay?”

“Perfectly fine,” Beca said, smiling. “Just thinking about my Chloe has made me go all… well… foolish is probably the best word.”

“Your… Chloe?”

“My wife,” Beca said. “Her name was Chloe.” She swallowed as she looked at the uncomprehending face before her. “She was beautiful. So beautiful. Red hair and bright blue eyes and she was kind, and good, and safe. She was my best my soulmate. And she had a voice like an angel. I’d give…” Beca swallowed again, “I’d give anything to hear her sing again. To hear my Chloe sing again.”

“Beca…”

“Do you know what she said to me the first time we kissed? She promised I would never lose her. We were in a tiny apartment in Brooklyn and she promised I wouldn’t lose her. But that’s the kind of promise only a kid could make. They have no idea, how could they?”

“Beca.”

Chloe’s hand gripped Beca’s and squeezed it. Tight.

“My… Beca?”

And there she was. Back like she’d never gone away.

“Chloe? You… you remember me?”

“Of course I remember you,” Chloe said. Then her eyebrows furrowed, and she looked around her room. “This isn’t our house.”

“No.”

Chloe swallowed and nodded. “I’m… I’m not well, am I?”

Beca sniffed and shook her head.

“Alzheimer’s?”

“Ah ha,” Beca said, fighting to keep her voice steady.

“Like my mom… How long?”

“T-two years,” Beca said. “I tried to take care of you but then I fell and broke my hip and I just… I couldn’t manage on my own anymore. The girls insisted. You’ve been here for about a year. You… you seem happy.”

Beca knew this lucidity wouldn’t last.

Chloe would be gone again, and probably soon.

This was her last chance.

“I love you, Chloe Mitchell, do you hear me? My heart belongs completely to you. And one day… one day soon, I’m not gonna be able to come and visit you anymore. And there may be days where you remember me, but you won’t remember I’m gone, and you’re gonna feel hurt and betrayed. You’re going to think I abandoned you,” Beca squeezed Chloe’s hand again, “but I promise you, if it was up to me, I would never leave your side.”

“So stay,” Chloe said, her voice breaking. “Stay with me.”

Beca gave her a sad smile. “In a few hours, you won’t remember me, baby.”

“How could I ever forget you?”

“Mom?” A voice spoke up from the doorway, and Beca turned to see Blake and Riley standing there. “Is everything-”

“Girls!” Chloe said, brightly. “Come in and meet my new friend Beca.”

No.

Not yet.

Please, not yet.

“Your new friend Beca?”

Beca forced the smile back onto her face, and she stood up.

“Nice to meet you,” Beca said, looking into the faces of her daughters. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

She turned to face Chloe.

“You’re leaving?”

“I should let you have some time with your girls,” Beca said. She took Chloe’s hand in hers, and looked at her wife for what would be the last time. “It was truly a pleasure meeting you, Chloe.”

“I’ll see you again I hope?”

Beca smiled. “Of course. You’ll remember what I said?”

Chloe tilted her head, her eyebrows pulled together in confusion.

“It’s okay,” Beca said. “I know you heard it. It’ll come back to you when you need it.”

“Okay,” Chloe said, still confused. “Do you think… would it be okay if we hugged? You can ask the girls, I’m a hugger.”

She heard a small sniff and she saw Riley quickly leave the room.

“Allergies,” Blake said, quickly.

“Of course we can hug,” Beca said. “I’ve had a wonderful afternoon with you Chloe.”

Chloe stood, her blanket slipping off her lap, and she wrapped her arms around Beca, and Beca hugged back as tight as she dared.

She buried her face in Chloe’s neck and breathed in.

She still smelled like Chloe.

“You know Beca, I think we’re gonna be really fast friends.”

And everything inside of Beca broke.

“Hey, what is it?” Chloe said, softly as Beca clung to her and cried.

“Mom, it’s okay,” Blake said. She stuck her head out of the door and called to her younger sister.

Chloe shot Blake a look of confusion as this apparent stranger sobbed into her shoulder.

“You’re okay,” Chloe said, softly. “Come on, now, you’re okay. I’ve got you.”

“I love you,” Beca whispered into her ear, choking it out between sobs. “Don’t forget that, okay? I love you.”

“Okay, that’s, um, very nice,” Chloe said.

Beca’s chest started feeling tight as she struggled to get air into her lungs.

“Why don’t you sit down? We can call a nurse and-”

“No,” Beca said, quickly, struggling to suck air into her useless lungs. “I just need… in my bag.”

“Here,” Blake said, handing her her inhaler.

“Thank you,” Beca said, taking several deep puffs from it. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… I’m sorry, Chloe.”

She looked at Chloe again, and knew with certainty it was for the last time.

She had gotten a couple of minutes with Chloe - the real Chloe - this afternoon and that was more than she could have hoped for.

“It really was lovely to meet you Chloe,” she said.

“Yes, you too,” Chloe replied, although she sounded less than convincing. “See you another time?”

“I look forward to it,” Beca said.

“Riley, why don’t you make sure… Beca, here, gets to where she needs to be,” Blake said, looking between her parents with pain in her eyes.

“Sure,” Riley said.

When they were away from the room, Riley pulled her Mom into a hug.

“That was a rough one, huh?” Riley asked.

“Unbearable,” Beca said. “She was… she was back. I had her back for like, five minutes. And then…”

Riley kissed her on the head. “Come on, I’ll get one of the nurses to get you some tea and when we’re done we can drive you home.”

Beca frowned. “It’s Thursday. Is Blake not doing dinner?”

“No, she is, but you don’t usually feel like company after a bad visit,” Riley said.

Beca waved a hand of dismissal. “I wanna spend some time getting climbed on by my grandkids. Will your new lady be joining us?”

Riley blushed like a teenager, despite being in her forties. “Not tonight, Mom. It’s a bit soon for a family dinner.”

“Oh come on, you’ve been dating for months! I want to meet her, I have so many embarrassing stories to tell!”

“I know you do,” Riley said. “Which is why we’re gonna wait a few more weeks before we scare her off. Don’t worry, there are endless amounts of family dinners ahead of us for you to embarrass me at.”

Beca smiled. “Okay,” she said.

She hadn’t told the girls she was sick. They had enough in their plates with Chloe, and she didn’t want to add to it.

When the time came, yes, she knew they’d be hurt. She knew that hurt didn’t even come close to covering it. They had all but said their goodbyes to Chloe, but they had no idea that Beca would be beating her to the afterlife.

She knew if she asked them, they’d rather she told them.

It was cruel to blindside them, but in a way wasn’t it crueler to have them watch her slowly waste away in a hospital? To leave them saddled with medical bills that their inheritance would only just cover?

Because she knew her girls, they wouldn’t just let her slip away. They’d want her to fight, and Beca was too tired for fighting.

No. She wouldn’t do that to them. She had already written letters for all of them - including Chloe - and she had left instructions with her solicitors that they would get handed out after her death.

In her will, she’d left most of her money to her daughters and Blake’s four kids, along with a lump-sum donation to Barden Nursing Home.

Her affairs were in order.

The girls didn’t need to know.

“Mom? Are you ready?”

Beca smiled as her daughters approached, and she gratefully took Riley’s hand when she offered it.

She was quiet on the drive back to Blake’s house.

“Sure you’re up for dinner, Mom?” Blake asked, glancing at her in the rear view mirror.

Beca smiled and nodded.

That night she basked in the attention of her grandkids.

The two twin boys - Jackson and Christopher, aged seven - kept trying to explain their favourite show to their grandmother.

They kept acting out scenes, speaking in odd voices, shooting each other with fake guns.

Beca tried to follow along but really she just wanted to watch them play.

The youngest - Davey, four - sat comfortably on her lap.

“Gram read it?” He said, holding up a book.

“Again?” Beca asked.

“Please?”

“Okay,” she said.

“Grandma!” Christopher said, pulling her attention back to him. “Grandma! Look! Then the bad guys do this!” He aimed a finger gun at his brother and deepened his voice. “Prepare to die!”

“Ah ha,” Beca said.

“Gram,” Davey tugged at her sleeve and then placed a hand on his book.

“Sorry,” Beca said, picking up where she left off from.

The noise and distraction was welcome.

It kept Beca’s mind from wandering. She needed a few hours where she wasn’t mourning Chloe.

It was working until ten year old Anne walked into the room, looking far too somber for any ten year old.

“Who’s upset you then?” Beca asked. “I might be old but I can still throw a punch.”

Anne smiled, but only just. “Is grandma better yet?”

Beca frowned. “No, honey. I’m sorry.”

Anne had been the apple of Chloe’s eye right up until the moment she started to forget her.

Blake and her husband David had made the decision early on that the kids shouldn’t visit Chloe. It would be too hard for them to see their grandma and have her not recognise them.

“Is she going to get better soon?”

Beca let out a small sigh. “I don’t know,” she said.

Anne’s face fell, and Beca’s heart broke.

She wished she didn’t have to leave these kids behind.

“Listen, your grandma loves you very much. And so do I. And we always will, no matter what.”

Davey started to fuss on Beca’s knee, and she turned her attention back to him.

“If I wrote grandma a letter, would you give it to her?” Anne asked. “I don’t want her to think I’ve forgotten her.”

Tears filled Beca’s eyes, and she smiled. “Of course. But you should give it to your Mom or aunt Riley. They’ll see her before I do.”

Anne nodded, and went off to her room.

The rest of the night continued the same way every Thursday night dinner did.

Blake complained that Beca ate too little and that her husband ate too much.

The twins would devour anything left too close to them, and Anne would pick out any bit of vegetable she found, no matter how small it had been cut up.

Then Beca would attempt to help with the dishes until she was told to cut it out, and Riley would drive her home.

Before she left that night, she hugged and kissed each of her grandkids, and told them all she loved them beyond comprehension.

She kissed Blake’s cheeks - standing on her tiptoes to do so - and briefly cupped her face in her hands. She told her she loved her too.

She patted David on the arm.

“You’re a good man,” she said. “You’ll take care of them.”

“Jeez, Mom, what’s got you so morbid?”

“Just the joys of ageing,” Beca said.

She didn’t know why she was feeling so sentimental that night, but she put it down to the emotion of the day.

In the car, Beca was quiet again.

“Something’s up with you,” Riley said.

“Today was tough,” Beca said, her head on the window. She turned to look at her daughter, and she seemed to transform in front of her eyes and back again. “Has anyone ever told you how much you look like your mom?”

“You, every day since I was born,” Riley said, laughing as she ran a hand through her short, ginger hair.

“This new girlfriend of yours,” Beca said, “is she nice?”

“What? Yes, Mom, of course.”

“She treats you well? She’s kind? She doesn’t blow up at wait staff or lose her temper in traffic?”

“She’s great,” Riley said. “Look, you can meet her soon, okay? She’s just a bit nervous around parents. She… she didn’t get on great with her own. They weren’t cool when she came out.”

Beca let out a sigh. “Poor girl. You’d think my generation would have grown out of that. Apparently not. As long as she makes you happy, and treats you well, then that’s all that matters.”

Riley laughed. “What, are you trying to make sure I’m married off before you kick it?”

Beca laughed too. “No. I just want you to be happy, my girl.”

“I am,” Riley said. “And not because I’m in a relationship, but because I just… am.”

Beca smiled. “Good. I’ve… I’ve had a very good life, Ri. And I don’t think I realised how good it was, how lucky I was, until your Mom got sick. I wish I could go back and just… enjoy it. Savour it. Those moments I spent with your mom where we would just… talk. And be with each other. I wish I could tell myself to appreciate each and every one.” Beca wiped her eyes. “Promise me you’ll do that?”

“Mom, you sound like you’re giving me some goodbye speech.”

Beca smiled and shook her head. “Promise me.”

“I promise,” Riley said. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m sure,” Beca said.

They pulled up outside Beca’s home.

“You want me to walk you in?”

“I’m not that old yet. I love you. You know that, right?”

“Of course I do. I love you too, Mom.”

Beca smiled at her daughter, and leant across the car to kiss her cheek.

“See you tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Beca said. “I need to pop into town and pick up a prescription.”

“I’ll take you.”

Beca smiled. “You’re a good girl. See you tomorrow.”

Riley waved and watched as her Mom walked into her house and shut the door behind her. She drove to her girlfriend’s, her heart heavy with sadness for her parents.

Maybe tonight she should tell Sarah that she loved her.

It was true, she had always just been too scared to say it.

She wasn’t sure what she was afraid of anymore.

Beca’s house was as quiet as it always was these days.

She made a cup of chamomile tea, and popped open the Thursday PM slot on her pill caddy. She took the handful of pills and swallowed them with a mouthful of tea.

Then she settled herself in her favourite armchair, and turned on some music.

She was tired.

Really tired.

It had been such a long day.

She felt a tightness in her chest, but it wasn’t any worse than usual so she thought nothing of it.

The song changed and the opening notes of Titanium played out.

This was considered an oldie now.

Beca smiled, and closed her eyes as she remembered the first time she sang that song with her wife.

God, what a life they’d had.

She didn’t open her eyes again.

[ilguna]

Sorry if this is too late for the blurb weekend as it's early morning where I live so I don't know if It's in time or not, but could I request Johanna Mason x gn reader with the song Flares by The Script.

☼ flares (Johanna Mason) ☼

warnings; swearing, suicide mention, hint at torture.

wc; 2.1k

–

There’s nothing more anxiety-inducing than three people sitting in a room waiting to hear news about their loved ones. Ever since the mission had been approved and the volunteers had been sent out, it’s been nothing but silence in this room. You all have your various activities to keep you sane and occupied. It doesn’t disguise the worry.

The Capitol is evil. The last time you saw them, they were all in perfect condition, with the exception of Peeta. He’s been all over the television recently. President Snow has been kind to allow you all to see Peeta’s rapid decline, showing just how much power they have. A person can be perfect one day, and the next they’ll look like they’ve risen from the grave.

You haven’t seen Johanna, you don’t know if she’s okay. You have this sick feeling in your throat that she won’t be. Knowing her, she probably said some things to take the attention off of Peeta. It was always the mission, you know it. Even if you weren’t in the arena personally, you saw the way she risked everything for this movement.

She saved Beetee and Wiress from death in the cornucopia. She lost Blight, one of your guys’ good friends, in the middle of protecting those two for Katniss. You watched her come near to death several times just to save Katniss or Peeta. And you’re so very lucky she made it out alive from the arena. That doesn’t mean her job was over, though.

You doubt that the Capitol would even go as far as to kill Peeta in the first place, anyway. He was their representative, the example to the rest of the Capitol and the districts of exactly what they could do. They can bring someone so close to death and withhold them from it for however long they want to. They brought Peeta to their mercy and made him dependent on them.

It makes you wonder how the transition will be for the rest of them.

Finnick is hunched over a rope, fingers twisting it between his fingers to create perfect knots before yanking them loose and starting them over. Katniss must’ve picked up on that same skill, because she’s tying a knot of her own, it doesn’t look as nice, though. It appears that she’s trying to create something specific, you just haven’t placed your finger on it yet.

On the way here to wait, you went through a lot of trouble to smuggle a knife here. The block of wood was much easier. There’s a part of District Thirteen where they keep building supplies. If that hadn’t been so easily accessible, you would’ve tried to sneak out again.

The last time was to see the stars and beg whatever is out there for an opportunity to get your Johanna back. They must have been listening, because it wasn’t even a full day later when you were being told that Coin was working on it.

They must know how much you need it, a little bit of hope to keep you going. You’ve been driving yourself up the wall trying to find ways to keep yourself busy while Thirteen won’t let you. You might not have had any significant hand in the rebellion at the moment, but you’re still a victor. You deserve to know what’s happening, especially since victors have been killed recently in the districts.

You chuck off another piece of wood onto the floor, ignoring the sound it makes as you move to continue the wooden portrait of Johanna. It’s not going to be done by the time she gets here, but you’ve already made a fairly large dent. You just need some sandpaper and maybe a smaller knife, if you can find one…

You can see what Katniss has made now, it’s a noose. You watch as she plays around with it. It’s too small for her to actually use, Thirteen wouldn’t dare to give either of them anything bigger than your forearm. You can’t blame them, having victor suicides under their care would send a message they can’t afford.

Yet here you are, with a knife that you’re not supposed to have.

Right when you begin to take a break, setting the knife and wood block aside to massage your hands, the door swings open. It must be midnight or later, because you’re feeling the effects of exhaustion. The second you see the crazed look in Haymitch’s eyes, though, you seem to suck it into your own body.

“They’re back. We’re wanted in the hospital.” You get to your feet, Haymitch is moving out of the way, “That’s all I know.”

It’s enough for you, feet moving before your brain tells them to. It’s a moment before you hear the other three trailing behind you. The faster you walk, the further the distance grows. You can’t seem to care to wait for them, to rip off the bandage at the same time. The thought of having Johanna with you again is so intoxicating, that waiting just a couple of seconds longer seems ludicrous.

No matter how fast you move, you’re forced to wait for them to join you in the elevator. When it stops moving, they seem to have caught the memo that you’re in a hurry, and they should be too. Annie is here, Peeta is here, and Johanna is here. Your people are all gathered in the same district now.

You push the doors open, and you’re immediately greeted by chaos. Doctors and nurses are running around, gurneys being pushed into private rooms. You watch, eyes sweeping the room for her.

The closest person you find is a girl, skinny and bruised, head shaved and unconscious, covered in scabs. The nurses push her right past you on the gurney, in a rush to get her to a certain area.

“Johanna?” you ask, following them in that direction.

It’s a moment before a nurse realizes, jumping in your path and holding you back as they take her away from this chaos. You watch, not really focused on the woman that’s actively getting in your way, until she places her hands on you to shove you back, “You can’t go with her. You need to wait here--”

“I was just told I had to come here,” you argue, using one arm to move her out of your way. She latches onto your wrist to hold you back.

“I can’t let you go.”

You stop long enough to actually look her over. You wonder who told her that she has this authority over you. She’s been hiding in a bunker for her entire life while generations of children have killed each other for the entertainment of the Capitol. You being one of those kids, only sixteen when you won.

“I’m sure you know this already, but I won the Hunger Games,” you slowly duck down to her height, “You really wanna tell me what I can and can’t do?”

Her hands release you immediately, face turning an unnatural color, green maybe? You don’t care, you turn away and head after Johanna before you lose sight of her. You’re not beside threatening the staff here at Thirteen. They may have rescued you all, but they seem to have this assumption that they’re all better than you guys because they never had to endure the Hunger Games.

That’s where they’re wrong. You’re strong because you had to overcome these games. You have fought to survive, and proved that you were better than the rest.

Again, at the door of the room they have Johanna in, they try to work together to push you out. There’s no chance, you will fight to be here with Johanna. For a second they try to explain that there needs to be privacy between the two of you, because it’s a rule at the hospital.

You can’t hold it in anymore, being forced to do this you don’t like. There’s only so much you can take. The satisfaction you get from making every single one of them flinch at the sound of your voice is worth it, “I’m her fucking fiance! The only condition I’m leaving this room on is if she wants me to!”

They seem to settle after that, making a point to steer clear of your bubble. You hold onto Johanna’s hand, stroking her skin gently to try and wake her up sooner. They were brief when they explained that the smoke the volunteers used had temporarily taken out the victors as well, not just Johanna. However, in her state, it wouldn’t surprise them if it took a little while longer to wake, compared to Annie, who is apparently awake.

The one thing the nurses are right about is that it does take her half an hour longer to wake. You can feel her hand squeeze yours back, eyes squinting when she goes to open them. You sit up taller, not yet announcing her wake to the nurses to allow Johanna to look around herself.

Her face is twisted, obviously confused. She can see you, though, which is all that really matters to you. As long as she knows that you’re next to her and won’t leave, then you could care less about what happens after.

“She’s awake.” one of the nurses says, drawing the attention over.

“Give her a moment,” you smile at her, “She’s disoriented, she was just in the Capitol. Hi, honey.”

She gives a weak smile for a moment, then turns her head away. She doesn’t speak, doesn’t look at you again, only the nurses as they wait for her to give an okay. When she nods when they ask, they immediately start doing what they couldn’t earlier. Asking her questions, starting bloodwork, testing reflexes.

Their questions start off basic, until they begin to reach what the Capitol may or may not have done to her, which is when she starts to clam up. You think it’s because she’s not ready yet, but her eyes shift to you.

“What is it?” you ask.

Her voice is firm, unlike what it’s been with the nurses, “Go.”

The word is so straightforward that you don’t even understand it at first. Go? Go where? And then she’s motioning at the door to put emphasis on the word. She wants you to go away and leave her here with the nurses and doctors.

“I know that’s not what you want, Jo,” you say to her carefully, watching her face, “Please don’t make me go.”

“I know what I want.” Johanna says, “And I want you to go, don’t be difficult.”

Your jaw sets, and all you can do is remind yourself that things aren’t going to be perfect at first. It doesn’t mean you can’t help the tears that are fighting their way into your eyes. Is it trust? Does she not trust you? Or is she afraid?

You have to be patient. You have to remember what you were like after you were crowned victor. How you’d pushed Johanna away for weeks trying to protect her from the horror. You felt like you were bleeding out, and she waited for you to go back to her.

You pull your hand from hers, pushing down the tough feeling in your throat. It’s not permanent. It’s a temporary change. You move to the door, take a deep breath, and before you leave, you smile again, “I’ll come back when you’re ready, okay?”

It feels wrong when the door shuts, and it feels wrong when you begin to walk away from her. In the main room, you can see Finnick and Annie, holding onto each other, caught in their own moment. Katniss is absolutely void, probably off with Peeta.

Like how they had brought you here, your feet begin to take you back to the room. You know your knife and the wood block will be there. You have nothing but time, anymore. You just need to keep yourself preoccupied while you wait for her to come back to you.

It doesn’t feel right, but you can’t force her to want you there. She’ll realize in time that she wants you, and when she does, you’ll be right there to resume where you’d left off. Hopefully she’ll see that she’s not alone in this, that you’ve been through it too, and you’ll walk with her every step of the way. Just like how she’d walked with you.

--

sorry this took so long!! i hope you like it! :)

this was part of my shine, dream, smile weekend!

[perfectpaperbluebirds]

@sicktember​ Prompt # 8: Contagious

Title: Unexpected Developments 

Fandom: Pride and Prejudice

Prompt inspired by @chezsnez ​. The prompt: “What if in P&P when Jane gets sick at Netherfield, the other guests catch her cold and Lizzie ends up having to take care of Darcy. Kinda like enemies to lovers but with enemies to caretaker.” Thank you as always for the wonderful ideas, my friend!

Jane Bennett’s cold has spread to all the guests at Netherfield, hitting some worse than others. How will Lizzie respond when she finds proud, arrogant Mr. Darcy sneezing miserably and running a fever?

Elizabeth stepped out into the hall, closing the door on Jane's sickroom behind her. Jane was lying down to rest, so Lizzie was left to her own devices for the next hour or two. With no obligation to visit with the rest of the guests today, she had decided to wander a bit to stretch her legs and familiarize herself with more of Netherfield. As she walked, she let her mind wander as idly as her feet.

"We're certain to never be asked back here again," Lizzie sighed to herself after a bit. While Lizzie herself didn't much care, Jane and her mother would be devastated.

The cold Jane had caught on her ill-fated horseback ride to Netherfield had proved to be very contagious. Charles and Caroline Bingley had succumbed to it quickly. At luncheon the day after Elizabeth arrived to care for her sister, the siblings were seen to have dark circles under their eyes, with nostrils tinged a raw-looking pink. Caroline was forced to press a handkerchief to her dripping nose more than once through the course of the meal, while Charles kept painfully coughing into his. Caroline retired immediately after the meal, complaining of a headache and did not return. Charles sent his apologies down just before supper, saying he too had taken ill and would be staying in his room. Walking past Caroline's door later while checking on Jane, Lizzie heard her sneezing so miserably that  Eliza felt a touch of sympathy for the unpleasant woman.

Mr. Darcy had been the one to carry the news of Bingley's illness to the rest of the party, but Elizabeth had hardly seen him since. She gathered he was either passing the time in his own room or else keeping Charles company. It seemed his immune system was hearty, for he hadn't seemed ill when she had last spoken to him. 

Several days had now elapsed since the onset of Jane's illness, and the eldest Bennett sister was doing much better, and in fact really had no need of a caregiver anymore, though she had said more than once that she was glad Elizabeth was there for the company. With any luck, the sisters would be able to go home in a few days, as long as the others had recovered as well. Elizabeth found this thought encouraging as she continued to explore. 

Eventually she came to a hallway at the far side of the house that she was sure would be a dead end and likely empty, but she preferred to look at it anyway, for perhaps it would have a nice view out the window. The hallway was in fact a dead end, but was far from empty.

Coming around the corner, she stopped short, for at the end of the hallway and facing the window was Mr. Darcy. With some amusement she realized he was about to sneeze, for he was hunched over with his handkerchief pressed to his face and his breath hitching desperately.

"Heh-ZZZIIIH'shieww! HIIHHK'choo!" He did his best to muffle the sound into his handkerchief, but was mostly unsuccessful. The sneezes were wet and miserable-sounding, and while Elizabeth couldn't see his face, she could imagine his equally miserable expression, for he sneezed like someone with a thick, burgeoning head cold.

She had a choice to make. She could very easily walk away and pretend she had seen nothing, leaving him and his cold to their own devices. After all, the fact that he had hidden away in this corner indicated that he didn't want to be discovered, and while he had been overall civil to her since she had come to stay here, his haughty pride and past treatment of her were not quickly forgotten. Or, she could offer him aid.

"Hih'GEHH'shuuh!" This 3rd sneeze, whether part of the trio or on its own (it was hard to be sure) was the most desperate and miserable sounding of them all. His shoulders slumped wearily as he tended to his nose in the aftermath, and she thought she heard him say something like "ick" as he did so as well.

"Bless you, sir," said Elizabeth boldly, coming fully into the hallway. He leapt around as if he'd been shot, his face reddening. She could see him frantically trying to think of a way to explain himself.

"My apologies," he muttered at last, gruffly. "That was most undignified."

"You have no need to apologize, for you didn't know I was here. It is I who should apologize for startling you. However, I wanted to ask after your health, for you sound most unwell."

"I am fine," he muttered, clearly uncomfortable. Looking closer at him, Lizzie saw the flush over his face might not be due entirely to embarrassment, but perhaps also to fever, for his eyes had the same unhealthy cast she had seen in Jane's eyes only a few days before. He was also swaying slightly where he stood, and had a dampness of sweat along his hairline.

"Might I offer to accompany you to your room, sir? You look as if you needed to lie down for a spell."

"That is… unnecessary. I can…." He cut himself off with a rough cough. She could tell he was desperately trying to think of an excuse as to why she shouldn't be the one assisting him. However, they both knew that Charles was sick (quite sick, if the murmurs she'd heard from the staff were to be believed), and that all the servants were overworked as it was with taking care of their master and his sister. 

"I'm sure you're quite busy with your sister. You need not concern yourself with me," he finally rasped. 

"On the contrary, she is resting peacefully, while you are positively trembling and look to be on the verge of collapse from fever. Take my arm and we shall see you to your quarters."

Mr. Darcy hesitated another moment, still casting around for some excuse. Knowing what needed to be done, Elizabeth moved to his side and gently linked her arm around his. She felt her heart flutter as their hands made brief contact. The fleeting thought crossed her mind that this was the first time they had touched. She had certainly imagined it occurring under different circumstances. Shaking away such thoughts, she started to walk, leading the much taller man toward his quarters. Mr. Darcy was enough of a gentleman to follow without further protest. 

As they walked, both of Mr. Darcy's arms were occupied, for the hand that wasn't linked with Elizabeth's was busy pressing his handkerchief to his face. Every few steps his shoulders would twitch, either from a stifled cough or a thick sniffle. She could sense he was desperately trying not to sneeze again. Between that and the fact that his large form was positively radiating heat, Elizabeth found herself quite distracted by him, and watched him intently out of the corner of her eye. The walk was a quiet one, for Elizabeth didn’t want to burden him with conversation when he was clearly otherwise engaged, not to mention ill.

They made it to his room without interruption, sneezing or otherwise. She allowed him to open the door, then she ushered them both in, with more than a little awkwardness on all sides. Mr. Darcy went immediately to sit on his bed, sinking down as if compelled by gravity, leaning his head into his hands as he continued to tremble.

"A headache troubles you as well, then?" she asked after observing his motionless form for a moment.

He nodded pathetically, not looking up. Out of nowhere, and startling them both, his breath hitched violently before a pair of sneezes erupted out of him. Thankfully they were directed at the floor. He pressed his damp handkerchief to his nose hastily, glancing at her and looking embarrassed.

"Forgive me," he muttered thickly, which was followed up with a cough.

"You need not waste your breath asking forgiveness every time you sneeze when you have a cold, for you have precious little breath to spare as it is. However, I must ask, why did you not alert someone of your illness? You are quite unwell, Mr. Darcy. Anyone can see it plainly."

"I did not want to be a bother, as everyone else was also ill. I thought it best to tend to myself."

"Whether or not you alerted someone, you shouldn't have gotten out of bed today. You've certainly made yourself worse by doing so."

He only groaned softly.

Elizabeth sighed to herself. "Please, if I may, let me help you feel more comfortable. You need to rest."

Hesitantly she approached him as he looked up to finally meet her eyes. With a gentle touch she guided him to sit up straighter, then deftly removed his cravat. She sensed more than heard his sigh of relief once it was off, and found herself letting her hand rest on his hot cheek under the pretense of checking his fever. He seemed to enjoy the touch immensely. Her eyes lingered on his face as he sat with his eyes closed, and many thoughts and feelings competed for space in her mind. She did her best to suppress them all.

 After a moment though, she broke the spell, and continued to help him remove his jacket, waistcoat, boots and stockings. He assisted as best he could with these attentions, but said nothing, merely following her every move with his guarded, intense gaze. Once the garments were set aside and he was looking much more loose and comfortable, if also embarrassed to be seen in such an undressed state, she pressed a glass of water into his hands and watched as he drank it down.

She took the glass from him, and setting it down, took up a cold, wet rag. She placed it against the back of his neck and was rewarded with a relieved sigh. From there she bathed the rest of his neck and the bit of chest that was visible, ensuring her gaze stayed far from his, but unable to help a bit of a blush creeping over her cheeks at such acts of intimacy with such a person. With continued gentleness, she pressed him back against the pillows. The movement of course made him cough pitifully. Soaking the cloth once more, she laid it on his forehead and left it there as she straightened the pillows around him.

That done, they simply surveyed each other for a moment. Mr. Darcy looked ill and altogether unimposing, lying in bed as he was, with tired circles under his eyes, a hacking cough, and a dripping nose.

"Are you feeling any better?" she asked hesitantly.

"Some," he grunted. "Now that I'm lying down."

"Excellent. Are you hungry at all? I think perhaps you should eat something."

His intense stare and large, warm presence were making her nervous all over again and causing her to seek escape from the small room.

"I suppose I could eat," he murmured.

"Yes, good. Then let me go fetch you some soup. I'll be back soon." She bustled out of the room immediately, a blush rising to her face, of uncertain cause. She did her best to quiet her racing thoughts as she sped toward the kitchen.

Mr. Darcy, for his part, was totally smitten with her. He was now convinced her fine eyes were the centerpiece of her completely wonderful countenance and figure. He watched the space where the corner of her skirt had disappeared intently, waiting for her return and recalling again and again the feel of her cool hand on his face.

(Part 1 of 2)

[imaginesmai]

Arvin Russell - The right time

SO YEAH I SAW THE DEVIL ALL THE TIME AND I LOVED IT!! My opinion about it is at the end! In case you haven’t seen it and you still want to read this, you can skip it by not looking at the A/N. Let me know what you think about the film in the comments, please! Or just message me! I’m feeling like writting about him, so please 

SEND YOUR REQUESTS.

Plot: Arvin’s father always told him to wait for the right time, and he thought it was the only right way to do things. Now, when you’ve been hurt because of him, he’s ready to take the matters into his own hands.

WARNINGS: TDATT SPOILERS. Mentions of rape. Murder. 

Arvin didn’t know if the preacher had heard him or not coming in, because he hadn’t turned around to look at him. If anything, that only made him angrier. He was sure that if he had heard him and looked at him, he wouldn’t have spared him another glance. Because Arvin Russell wasn’t of his interest, not because of the money and the gender. The last thought made him tighten his grip around the gun, willing himself not to shoot him before the right time.

Since Lenora’s death, he had been waiting for the right time. That was what his father told him; to wait for the right time, and then to avenge yourself. He had been doing pretty good with that mantra, or at least most of the times. Arvin had followed the preacher to his house and to his adventures with young women. He had watched as he fucked a young girl from Lenora’s class and then went back to his wife, scoffing when dinner wasn’t ready and urging her to satisfy him when bed time arrived. He had held his gun tight to his chest, knowing the right time would eventually come; and then, he had hated his father more than ever, because listening to him had almost caused another precious death.

“Arvin!” his grandma called from downstair. Quickly, he closed the notebook where he was keeping track of the preacher’s actions. “Boy, Mr. Y/L/N is here!”

Arvin frowned at the mention of your father. You had known each other for your whole life, so he knew your family story; that your mother had left you after promising your father that she would leave her adventurous life when she got pregnant. She left with some young man that was going to travel the world, and your father had locked himself up in a unbreakable shell, forgetting about his eleven’s years old daughter.

Not once he had seen your father outside your house, you being in charge of dropping food and money for him. Not matter how many times Arvin had tried to convince you that you would be better on your own. Even living with him, once your relationship wasn’t just friends anymore. But you had just shook your head softly and told him that you couldn’t leave him, not yet.

So it was strange that it was your father and not you who was knocking on his door. He had agreed to meet you that morning to show you finally what he was on lately, since he couldn’t hide anything; but you hadn’t come, with the excuse of visiting Lenora’s grave once more. You were her best friend, so after offering to go with you, he agreed on meeting you at night.

Briefly, he looked to the box where you two were saving a bit of your earnings for your life together. He doubted your father knew about it, so he got up and walked down the stairs.

“Here he is” Emma smiled at him. “Well, I’m leavin’ you to it. I’m in the kitchen”

“Arvin” your father called his name, voice croaked from not using it. “God, you’re a man now”

Arvin gave your father a small smile. The man, once handsome, broad and tall, was now hunched shadow. He had a several days long beard, skinny arms and wide clothes. Mr Y/L/N was hiding his hands behind his body, only making him look worse. Still, Arvin extended one hand and offered him a shake, greeting him.

“I’m – uh, sorry, you didn’t have to come down. But Emma started calling you before I could explain” he gave him an awkward chuckle.

“Don’t worry, Mr. Y/L/N. Is there… anything I can help with?”

“Is Y/N here?”

The question caught Arvin off guard, because usually you spent days in Arvin’s house and your father didn’t notice as long as there was food on the fridge. Lately, the man had been doing an effort of getting better, and some nights you had told Arvin how he had attempted to cook for you. From there to wondering where you were there was a huge step, and for a second Arvin tried to sniffle for any track of alcohol. There was none.

“Usually, I wouldn’t really care but, you know – getting better and all” he tried to explain himself. “She spends most of the time here, so I thought that maybe she’s around? I haven’t seen her since yesterday’s afternoon”

The last part caught Arvin attention. He talked with you last time before starting yesterday’s shift, which was before noon. And you told him you were going to spend the rest of the day with your father, and that the next morning you intended to pay Lenora a visit. He hadn’t worried about it, because he had been busy and trusted you to take care of yourself. But if you hadn’t slept on your house, then there was something to worry about.

“She… Y/N told me she was goin’ to spend the mornin’ in the graveyard” Arvin mumbled.

“Oh, she went yesterday after you left her home” he explained, making Arvin’s blood run cold. “I had things to do so she told me she’d go and then pay you a visit”

Your father said something else, but Arvin wasn’t listening anymore. There was another person he had missed last night; the preacher, who usually went home somewhere near eight, didn’t appear until very much later. He knew because he had been waiting outside his house, watching his wife sitting in front of a cold dinner with tears on her eyes. He had thought nothing of it at first, but now, he choked on his breath knowing what could have happened.

Arvin’s body collided with your father when he walked past him and ran out of the house, hearing the man calling out for him. His grandma also looked through the kitchen window, screaming his name before Arvin disappeared into the field that went to the town’s graveyard.

Thinking about it, Arvin knew it was like finding a needle in a haystack. Knockemstiff was full of sinners, bad people and wicked intentions. Even if you didn’t go to highschool no more and worked to provide to your father, Arvin had had to deal with a few men who thought you were available, whether you wanted or not. There were a lot of people who could have hurt you, a lot of reasons why you didn’t go back home last night, and none of them made sense in his head.

You knew how to defend yourself, you had a car that could help you to escape any delicate situation, and you never got lost. Not once you had wandered off without telling anyone, not even your father. Even if he wasn’t listening or paying attention, you always told him where you were going.

Thoughts ran past his mind at the same time Arvin ran past his neighbours and cars, trying not to collide with anyone but finding it difficult, since he couldn’t see much past his oncoming tears. Loosing Leonora had been one thing. His sister, his family and the person he had fought nail and tooth to protect for so many years. He had been waiting for the right moment to avenge her, to put a bullet in between the preacher’s eyes, or maybe a few. One for every second she had suffered hanging from that rope.

And he swore, that if he had had anything to do with your disappearance, there wouldn’t be an inch of his body untouched by the bullets.

He wasn’t as late as he could have been, he guessed. The police was warned, a group of villagers offered to help, and Arvin himself kept running in circles around the graveyard for the whole day. Even Grandma, who wasn’t in the best shape, had helped into the search. And she had been the one who had found you, maybe because she had just this woman-ly instinct or because God had wanted it to be a woman who found your naked, bruised body and not some sinful man.

Arvin had arrived then – and sure, you were alive, recovering in his room because he didn’t want to leave your side ever again, barely saying a word and healing from the bruised kidney. But you weren’t fine, you weren’t smiling at Arvin and cradling his head when he lost his track. It had been obvious what had happened that day, why it had taken Arvin a few hours to find each piece of your clothes and where the bruises around your thighs came.

Your father had dissapeared again, locking himself in his room and forgetting about his daughter once more. But Arvin had been there every second for the past week, getting you to eat what you could and holding you tight through the nightmares. 

The bench he was sitting on creaked under his fingers when Arvin thought about your sobs, how your tried to hide beside him when last week you complained about Virginia heat. The preacher looked back to Arvin, who wasn’t visible because of the cap.

“Excuse me, preacher” Arvin’s voice didn’t waver. “You got time for a sinner?”

Upon hearing Arvin’s voice, and knowing it wasn’t anyone from his interest – a girl – he turned around and motioned for him to keep going. It wasn’t any more about Lenora´s death, because Arvin would have had enough with killing him. Maybe making him suffer for a bit, making him feel the desperation of knowing death was the only answer. Now, however, Arvin wanted to cut off every inch of skin that had touched yours.

“Go ahead” preacher Teagardin told him, going back to his lecture.

Arvin took his time, talking about everything that the preacher had done of thought about since he put a foot in Knockemstiff. He talked about how the preacher forced his wife to please him late at night, how he ordered her around as if she was just a servant. He talked about how he liked young girls, those who were innocent enough that didn’t have to be forced, just manipulated. About the pregnancy, and how he cowered away once his decisions had repercussions.

He watched from behind his cap how the preacher left the book on the bench, his eyes widening in size as he realised the sins Arvin was talking about were his. He turned around finally, locking eyes with Arvin, but not recognizing him. Why would he, though, since everything he looked at were Arvin’s precious girls. First his sister, and now his girl. As he continued, he shifted the gun on his lap, wanting to end his story before blowing his brains out.

“And there is this other girl. She ain’t like the rest, cause she doesn’ fall for the lies. So I decided to approach her when she was alon’, kicked her head open and brought her to the back of my car. Forcer her and left her in the woods” Arvin’s finished. “Didn’ care if she was a ‘right or not. Just fucked her good and left her to die”

“Who are you, boy?” the preacher chuckled awkwardly, getting up. “Why don’t you take off your cap?”

“She was found, thankfully. Naked, bruised, unconscious. She doesn’t talk no more, just cries” Arvin’s voice was full of venom, finally taking off his cap. “But I don’ care, cause I ain’t responsible for that neither”

The preacher went to jump forward, maybe hoping to kill Arvin, scare him away or knock him unconscious. If it came to Arvin’s word against his, probably just a few people would believe Arvin; but the truth would come out eventually, and both of them knew it. No one would ever know what the preacher would have done then, because true to his word, Arvin Russell didn’t leave an inch of the preacher’s skin untouched from the bullets.

-

Later that night, Arvin walked into his dark room, knowing it would be his last night in Knockemstiff. He still didn’t have a plan, didn’t have a way to leave without being chased or hurting his family. For that night, he was just a scared boy whose responsibilities would have to wait.

He climbed into the room through the window, not making any noise and avoiding his grandma and grand uncle. If they didn’t know he was there that night, they wouldn’t have anything against the police; they would be safe. They would be just fine with the money he was leaving behind, probably a bit tight but enough to have a good life. The next problem, however, was harder. He let you nest against him when he crawled into bed, let you hide your face against his neck and not talk for another night of what happened that day. Not that there was much to talk, because it wouldn’t happen again.

Not knowing if you heard him or not, Arvin told you what he had done. Tears ran down his cheeks when he told you how he couldn’t stop pulling the trigger on him, how he would do it again and again, and how he felt guilty about not doing it sooner. The same as your father, he expected you not to hear a word of what he had said. But you surprised him when your shaky, thin hand made its way to his cheek and made him look at you.

“You can’t say anything, Arv” your whispered, the pale cheeks a contrast with your hard voice. “We need to run away”

“W-we?” Arvin frowned, confused. “You can’t – darlin’, I-I can’t… you and, uh, we –“

“You’re not leaving without me, Arvin Russell”

For the first time in a week, you pressed your lips against him. He had almost forgotten how it felt to have something good, not just rage and pain. Arvin let more tears fall as he slowly cradled the back of your head, not wanting to move in case it would end. It didn’t last longer, anyway; soon, you were tearing away. But rather than just cuddling his side, you laid your head against his shoulder and hug his middle.

He had thousands of thoughts that he wanted to say. That he was sorry, for not telling you sooner what he was doing and for not taking better care of you. That he should have taken care of the preacher on the begging, and not trusting on the advice of someone who killed himself in front of their kid. But he didn’t say anything, just hug you close, knowing there was no way he would leave the town without you.

Because together, everything felt like the right time.

Want to read more? Check out my side blog @imaginesmaimasterlists​, where I keep all the masterlists! Feedback is always appreciated

Tom Holland and Peter Parker Taglist

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A/N (my opinion on tdatt):

So, WOW. I saw it last night because I don’t have Netflix, so I had to meet a friend to watch it. And it was - wow. The way Tom Holland and Robert Pattinson go out of their way to work their accents and roles is amazing. Even though I hate the preacher’s character (who doesn’t), I loved how Robert works with him and makes him his. He’s always an amazing actor, but this time he outdid himself!

And Tom... Well, he got me with the first word he said. That part when he’s with Lenora and gets beaten up... and then, the way he avengers her from the bullies is amazing. I also loved watching how he had a relationship with a fem character that wasn’t romantical. He showed every emotion, thought and action with just his face, and I love him for it.

I don’t think it’s a film that should be seen just becuase he’s in it. It’s amazing, breath-taking and beautiful. I love this kind of films, but if you don’t is understable. It’s quite violent and can tigger anybody. Still, I’ll give it 8/10 - becuase I would have loved to see more of other characters! Message me if you want to talk about it

[sunaswife]

Summary: It’s been five years since you’ve seen your ex, Rin. He’s still not over you and you’re not over him. When he finds out you have children he thought he didn’t have a chance. Then he finds out they’re his? All of a sudden you’re teaching Suna how to be a single dad.

🔪: <3 thanks for all the support so far

Warnings: Fluff, angst I guess, drama, and cuteness twin overload

Previously Up Next Masterlist

Chapter Thirteen

“Kuroo-San I’m very flattered but in reality I’m seeing someone.” You chuckled awkwardly as you both walked to the lounge after today’s game. “Really?! Since when! About a month ago during the black Jackals game you just said you were a single mom!” He exclaimed. “Well..in reality..I’m trying to make amends with the father of my children. We were both dumb and immature but now since we’re older, we can have a decent conversation. And I still have feelings for him in a way and he’s already confessed..so...” you scratched the back on your head. “Have you accepted his confession..?” He asked. “Well..I mean I kind of changed the subject..” you replied awkwardly. “Poor guy..” he put his hand on his chest as if he felt the pain. “Well it’s not right to pressure someone into going on a date with them so I’m sorry. I was out of line. And I hope everything goes well between you and Rintarou.” He said with a soft smile. He patted your head and walked away down the other hall, you just stood there dumbfounded. How does he know Rin is the dad..?

You haven’t checked social media or sports news so you’re not sure if people already know. You made you way into the lounge and opened your small locker. You took out your purse and walked to your car, you tried walking as fast as possible to avoid talking to people and when you were in the comfort of your car you took out your phone.

Your eyes widened at the amount of phone calls and messages Rin sent. You didn’t even have a chance to read the messages since you decided to call back Rin and wonder what is going on. “It’s about time you answer.” He immediately gritted, he obviously sounded pissed. “Excuse me?” You immediately said with such confusion.

Does he seriously think he can get away with talking to you like that?

“I said it’s about time you fucking answered. Why weren’t you answering my calls or messages?” He asked. “I was obviously working.” You said in a duh tone. “Is something wrong?” You asked. “YES something is wrong! My son almost died and I didn’t know what to do!”

Your heart dropped. He almost...died..? “W-wait—“ you shook your head. “What do you mean he almost died?” You asked. “He had an allergy attack and I had to use an epipen. I didn’t know what to do at the hospital. I rarely had any information. You never told me if the kids had insurance or anything.” “Is Rini okay?” You immediately asked. “Yes he’s fine. But you didn—“

“I’m on my way. For the next eight hours, think before you speak, okay? Don’t say anything you’ll regret.” You warned. “Whatever.” He muttered and hung up. Immediately your heart clenched and you threw your phone at the passenger seat. You rubbed your face and leaned forward and gripped the steering wheel.

“What the fuck.” You sighed. Throughout the drive back to Hyogo your hands began shaking thinking about your kids and Rin. The kids went through something traumatic, and you weren’t there to help them or to protect them. What kind of mother are you? You wanted to slap yourself so hard, jump off a cliff. Receive some sort of punishment for being such a stupid mother and trusting Rin with your children.

After a few hours, your makeup needed a touch up, your hair was a mess for running your hands through your hair hoping your son is okay. Your eyes felt droopy. You’ve only slept a good six hours between drives and it’s way past midnight. The sun began to rise and you finally passed the billboard welcoming you to the hyogo prefecture. You went to the hospital Rin said they were at and you quickly parked and made your way inside.

The poor lady in the office seemed startled at your appearance, your clothes were wrinkled, and your shirt was untucked and unbuttoned from the top, you had bags under your eyes, you were a whole mess. When she gave the room number you slipped off your heels and began jogging to your location. The door was opened so you peeked in and saw your daughter playing with her fox plush on the uncomfortable couch chair.

It was like she sensed you so she looked up and you made eye contact with your little girl. Her eyes immediately watered and she hopped off the chair crying. “Mommy!” She sobbed and you immediately bent down to pick her up. You held her close and her grip tightened around your shoulders. “Rini doesn’t feel good..” she mumbled in your ear. “I know baby, I know.” You answered and dropped your heels by the entrance.

You made you way inside and saw Rin hunched over on the bed sleeping. He was holding Rini’s hand who was also asleep. He looked alright and you sighed in relief. “Have you slept, Akira?” You asked and she nodded. “I slept with Rini, but grandma wanted me to go back home with her. But Rini needed me. He’s my twin.” She wiped her eyes and slightly pulled away. You neared the other side of the bed and pulled the lounge chair closer so you can sit. Akira was on your left thigh with her head still on your shoulder. You looked at Rini sleeping and you brushed some hair out of his face. He slowly opened his eyes and he smiled lazily, “I missed you momma..” he mumbled. “I missed you too. I came as fast as I could.” You assured. “I was so scared.” He admitted. “I know..and I’m sorry I wasn’t there to help you.” Your eyes began to water. “Don’t cry mommy.... then I’ll cry..” Rini held your hand with his free hand.

Your wiped under your eyes with the sleeve of your blazer to stop the tears from falling and you smiled again. “Okay I won’t cry.” You said and released a breath. “Can you sing me a song?” Akira asked in your neck, “Yeah I want a song too, please.” Rini pouted and you nodded. They had a favorite song from a certain show that they enjoyed the most. You began to sing softly and Rini squeezed your hand and Akira began to fall asleep again.

I always thought I might be bad

Now I'm sure that it's true

'Cause I think you're so good

And I'm nothing like you

Look at you go

I just adore you

I wish that I knew

What makes you think I'm so special

You saw as Rini’s eyes began to close so he could fall back to sleep, you heard snoring right in your ear and realized Akira knocked out as well. “You have a beautiful voice.” Rin said softly as he rested his head on the side of his arm. “Sorry that I woke you up.” You quickly apologized. “No it’s fine..” he yawned and slowly sat up. He winced slightly, “Damn I need to see a chiropractor.” He muttered and you released a small chuckle. “Me too.” You said.

“So is Rini okay? What happened?” You asked and he sighed and looked into your eyes. “My mom got some burgers from a restaurant where peanut oil is used. She didn’t know Rini was allergic and I didn’t check the bag.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” You raised your voice and his eyes widened. “Your mom almost killed our son and you blame me for leaving you without any information?” You asked and he looked down guilty. “She didn’t kn—“

“Of course she doesn’t know because all day she was acting like a conceited bitch instead of being a grandmother to her grandkids. She even called me a whore—“

“No she didn’t.” He immediately interrupted. “She didn’t because you stopped her. But that’s what she thinks right? I model for Hana’s company to support her and to build up my self esteem and now I’m a whore? And you had the audacity to talk to me so rudely when I didn’t do anything. If you’re going to be treating me like that then there’s the fucking door. You understand? Never again will I be disrespected by a man.” You said and he had no words.

“You make it seem like I did it on purpose. I was sleep deprived and scared. I felt like I was going to throw up.” Rin squinted his narrow eyes.

“Do you have any idea what I felt when I got a call eight hours away that my son almost died? Imagine how I feel when he calls out to me and I’m not there. I feel like I failed them as a mom, my chest hurts and I’ve always been there. Always. And now I leave them in your hands and something happens and I can’t get there soon? I almost had a panic attack on the drive!” You exclaimed and he stayed silent. He didn’t want to continue fighting. He’s sure the kids are awake and listening to everything.

“I’m sorry.” He said and looked at his hands. He felt defeated and disappointed. You shouldn’t be so hard on him, it’s been less than a month since he took on this role. “Hey look at me.” You called softly, he looked up and you made eye contact once more. “I’m sorry for going off on you like this, I’m just as upset and afraid as you are and I’m sure you haven’t slept much.”

“I could say the same for you, you look like shit.” He cracked a tiny smile and you rolled your eyes with a giggle. “So did your mom eventually decide to be a grandma or she still hates me so she’s not getting close?” You asked. “She went back home to bring some clothes and then to get us some breakfast. I sent her a screenshot of my notes.” He said and you nodded. You obviously still felt uneasy with her, but they deserve a grandma and if she’s being civil you have no reason to take them away from her.

There was a knock at the door and you and Rin immediately turned your heads. “Oh you must be mom..” the doctor said. “Yeah I’m mom.” You said. She explained that Rini stayed longer than usual because he is a child. After a severe allergic reaction there can be aftershocks hours after the person receives treatment and that can lead to a seizure. She praised Rin for quick thinking and following proper steps to insure his child’s safety.

When the doctor left, Rin’s mom waltzes in and she freezes when she sees you. You take a deep breath and release and decide that it’s best to keep quiet. You wouldn’t want a clique animosity between you and your maybe future mother in law.

“I brought Rini some spare clothes.” She said as she opened Rin’s old gym bag. “He doesn’t own that jacket.” You pointed out. Her face flushed slightly, “I know..but this was Rintarou’s favorite jacket when he was his age..I thought it would be nice to wear. I have a lot of Rin’s old baby and child clothes.” She admitted softly, almost scared that you would snap any minute. And you would, so she was wise to walk on eggshells.

“Okay that’s fine.” You gave in. You helped Rini get dressed while Rin was talking to the doctor and getting ready to check out. You walked barefoot down the hall with your pink heels in your right hand, while Akira held your left hand. Rini was holding hands with Suna and Rin’s mom was holding their stuffed animals. She trailed behind you four and saw how you and Rin swung akira with you arms, her little giggles filled the hall releasing serotonin to the patients and nurses nearby.

“Momma aren’t you gonna put your shoes on?” Rini asked, “My feet hurt and I don’t feel like falling.” “But it’s hot outside, you can burn your feet.” Rin spoke up, “I think I’ll be fine.” You assured. He rolled his eyes and let go of the kids. You were about to step on the asphalt of the parking lot after checking both sides and all of a sudden you’re being knocked back from your legs and carried bridal style. “RINTAROU PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANT.”

“Nah.”

The kids giggled at their parents funny behavior, you kicked the air and squirmed but his grip tightened. “Do you really wanna get down?” He asked and you said yes. He pretended to drop you and you gripped onto his shirt for dear life and he started laughing. “I swear to God I am going to kick you where the sun doesn’t shine.” You muttered. He finally put you down but you were so distracted you were already at your car.

Karin took the kids to her car since the car seats are in there, so now it’s just you and Rin. “You give me a headache.” You told him. “But you love this headache—“ both your eyes widened and he stopped, “—sorry.” He immediately apologized.

You turned away to yawn and you muttered an it’s okay. He opened the car door for you just like old times, much to your dismay and he closed it when you entered. You put on your seatbelt and he fixed the seat and complained at how tiny you were. He was expecting you to fight back and bicker but you were already asleep.

He leaned forward and fixed your head so you wouldn’t hurt your neck. He started the car and began driving back home. He saw the two empty cups of coffee and some energy bar wrappers on the floor. The phone wasn’t playing any music but the volume was up to 20. You must have been so tired driving all last night and the night before for nine straight hours. No wonder you blasted music to keep you up and drank coffee.

He soon made it home and tried waking you up, but you didn’t budge. Not even shaking you work. You were a muttering unconscious mess when he helped you out and carried you bridal style once again. His mom let him in and he told Akira to unroll the futon in the living room since he couldn’t take you upstairs. He successfully placed you down and helped take of your blazer, he thanked god you were wearing an undershirt thanks to akira checking (no somnophilia shit here atm) and he helped unbutton your dress shirt so you wouldn’t feel hot. He put a light blanket over you. “Can’t believe I have to get you ready for bed like a child.” He muttered with a shake of his head. “Silence bottom, it’s mimi’s time.” You said in your sleep.

The kids ate their breakfast in the car as well as Karin. They were already awake and playing with Chewy outside again. “Mom.” He called, “Yes?” She asked from the kitchen. “Can I borrow your makeup wipes?” He asked. She smiled softly, looking out the window to check on the kids. “Yeah go ahead, they’re in the bathroom.”

Rin came back with the wipes and began wiping the makeup off your face. He didn’t want to press too hard to hurt you. But damn, this makeup was hard to take off. Finally you slept comfortably without makeup, without any interruptions. “Sweet dreams, love.” He smiled and moved the hair away from your face.

He stood up and grabbed the bag with all the kids school stuff and sat in the picnic table outside. “Alright you rascals time for school!” He yelled and the kids yelled an okay and went to join their dad.

“Hey dad..” Rini said. “What’s up?” Rin looked at his son, “I love you a lot. To infinity and beyond. Mama says that’s called unconditional love.” He said and Rin smiled with a nod. “Exactly, and I love you two unconditionally as well.” He said and Akira peered up from her work sheet. “Do you love mom unconditionally?” She asked Rintarou.

“Yeah. Yeah I do.”

Fun facts:

Someone asked me to do fun facts and if I had any for future chapters so here I go

The song YN sang is love like you from Steven universe but this is my fav version.

‘Mimi’s’ means sleeping time, Akira didn’t know how to say sleeping when she was a toddler so she would say Mimi’s cuz uncle Oikawa would say “es tiempo de dormir.” Which means ‘it’s time to sleep’. So MIMIS is taken for the ‘mir’ in dormir. (Sorry that was a long explanation) (if you live in a Mexican household then u might usually hear this)

YN drives a Black Honda CR-V (nice mom van) ☺️ while Rin has a White Nissan GT-R but he’s thinking of trading it in for a four door sports car to take the kids and yn along

Rin still has his old black mustang in a garage rental back in Tokyo where he would drive with YN everywhere. He wants to fix it up and gift it to one of his kids when they’re older 🥺

Idk why I’m talking about cars

Rin was a blushing mess when he was getting yn ready for bed and his heart stopped when she snuggled into him

After he admitted he loved YN unconditionally, Akira called him a simp

🏷: @therealwalmartjesus @differentballooncollection @aaesuki @atsunflower @dope-squish @prettysetterboiss @june-phantom @tomo-uwu @austriasmariazelle @xrnia @katsulia @aprettyfruit @shut-your-eyes-kiss-me-goodbye @tvbiio @sun-daddy-yoriichi @kamenoyaki @ppangiiroo @loeyprivvv @kmskj92 @lovinnoya @sarahvvictoria @tris-does-stuff @mokkeguts @sunaluvr6969 @bara-rose-would @sempiternal-amour @volleybloop @leykyuu @bokutoichigo @stfucanunot @iloveanime691 @atsumusdomain @ohrintarou @shoutosimp @mqrinqcele @bokutosdivineass @anngelllla @toworuu @hidden-otaku-stuff @seijohiselite @caxsthetic @aquariarose @hhwanggu @bakuhoetoedoroki @yoozuku @osamus-onigiri @akaashi-todorki @donica95 @kakaokenma @airheadpillar

[samstrugglingwithlife]

S/O Flinching And Raising Their Arms In Self Defence Due To Past Trauma

Genre: Angst with a good ending, hurt & comfort

Warning: Trauma, anxiety and fear. Heavy topic. Freaking Long ass.

Character(s): Tsukishima, Kuroo, Oikawa

A/N: I should’ve written this one sooner but my own circumstances got to me. I hope this gives you some form of relief and anyone who has these traumas or fears, it is best to seek help either professionally or from someone you trust the most. I am here and my inbox and private messages are always open if anyone ever needs to talk.

TSUKISHIMA

I feel like being as observant as he is, Tsukishima will notice how you react to your parents the few times he has been over to your house. He'd see how you flinch, yelp when they raise their voices, he even noticed your arms twitching as if they are ready to come up and hide your face. He saw everything but never said anything.

Sometimes he'd forget that things are rough at home because whenever you are with your boyfriend, you're always happy and cheerful; You forget all the things bothering you, even when he doesn't exactly put any effort, he just stays next to you.

It was a date like any other date, the two of you were hanging out at a nearby bakery after school, sharing a dessert and drinking your tea and milkshakes. You kept looking at your phone and fidgeting, your leg shaking impatiently; you weren't really paying attention to anything Tsukki was saying, lost in your own troubling thoughts.

Midway through his conversation, he noticed that you weren't paying attention and were lost in your own thoughts with a troubling expression on your face.

Tsukishima frowned as he noticed you fidgeting, "Y/n?" he called out your name. When you didn't respond, he called your name again. You didn't respond even when he called out your name several times.  

He raised his arm and brought it close to your face and snapped his fingers. You flinched and yelped, suddenly bringing your arms up to cover your face. You were quivering in fear. As soon as he saw panic in your eyes, Tsukishima reels back his arm and instantly appears by your side. "Y/n?" He asks as gently as he could, trying his best to hide the shaking of his own voice.

Luckily, there were only a few patrons other than you two in the bakery, so there wasn't a lot of eyes on you guys. 

Listen, Tsukki is also a teen, he wouldn't know how to handle the situation, but I'll be damned if he doesn't try to help you out to the best of his abilities.

He read somewhere that to help someone with anxiety attacks,  its best to remain as calm as possible; he had never felt more grateful to a small fact he had read so fleetingly. 

Tsukki rubs your back soothingly; "Hey, you know I won't hurt you, right?" he tries to keep his voice as gentle possible, making sure that you don't hear the slight panic in his voice.

He sticks by you until you calm down, he makes you sip your drink, and when you finally settle down, he sits back on his spot, making sure to keep his hands out of view.

"I'm sorry..." you apologise, not looking him in the eye. Tsukishima sighs, "It's okay Y/n. This isn't your fault, but you need to tell me what happened," he asks you.

Reluctantly, you tell him how your parents use violence as a form of discipline and punishment; you explain to him that they do not listen to you at all and say a lot of harsh words without a second thought.

To say he was mad was an understatement, Tsukishima was seething, but for your sake, he suppressed the anger from showing on his face. He listened and listened, and with each terrible thing you told him, his heart grew heavier.

When you had nothing more to say, as gently as he could, without a word, he reaches out and holds your hand across the table, rubbing soothing circles with his thumb on the back of your hand.

"Honestly," he begins. "I don't know what to say... What's supposed to be an appropriate reaction to all of this".

"I'm angry, I am furious, I hate what I'm feeling..." he tells you. "Are you angry at me?" you ask. He looks at you as if you've offended him, "No, I'm not mad at you at all. None of this is your fault. I'm mad at your family. I hate them".

Tsukishima squeezes your hand affectionately and with sympathy as you blink away your tears. "What's been bothering your today?" he asks gently, nodding towards your phone. "My mom's mad at me for some reason..." you tell him.

"Do you want to stay at my place tonight?" he asks, you shake your head, "My mom will lose it and she's already super mad right now". Tsukishima thinks for a bit before saying, "Do you want me to stay with you tonight?" 

He sees you perk up and smiles, "I'll stay at your place tonight, cool?" you nod excitedly, "Thank you!"

He orders you another dessert before walking home with you.

KUROO

Kuroo had no idea of the past you tried to forget and hide from everyone. The two of you met as interns at the same workplace, and because you guys clicked with each other so well, it wasn't long until you two became lovers.

If young Kuroo was super intuitive and observant, then imagine how perceptive he would be when he's all grown up and experienced. 

You've never told him about your abusive parents, but he had some idea that there were some traumas in your past that you were unwilling to discuss. He figured that you hated being yelled at and didn't deal well with intimidating people. He's seen you with superiors, you get nervous and antsy when you're doing a task because you're scared to make a mistake, you also stumble over your words in front of the boss, and sometimes just avoid overall confrontation.

He's never said anything. He figured that if you're not willing to share this with him, then you must have a reason. He does, however, always speaks to you in a gentle tone, he never loses his patience with you and tries to never show you the angry side of him, if it isn't directed at you.

But he only human, after all, and sometimes somethings can get the best of anyone. One of the employees, who worked as your's and his junior, had made a major mistake in a very important document; the deadline was right around the corner, and there was very little time to fix the problem. 

It was Friday evening, and you two had just arrived home after work when Kuroo received the e-mail from the said employee. As he read the mail over and over, his temper began to rise.

"Babe, are you okay?" you ask and place your hand on his back, soothingly, as he rakes his hand through his hair. "Fucking HELL!" he suddenly yelled and threw his phone on the couch. With a scared scream, you reeled back and raised your arms to cover your ears with your hands. 

He snaps out of his anger as soon as he sees your reaction; within seconds, he is by your side. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" you're chanting with your eyes screwed shut, ears covered and body hunched over. 

Kuroo wraps his arms around you and brings your face against his chest, "Baby, I am sorry! I shouldn't have raised my voice," he says. You tremble in his hold, crying silently, "I'm sorry!"

Kuroo's heart wrenches in his chest, "Why are you apologising? I should be the one! I am so sorry Y/n, I shouldn't have yelled like that," he apologises. "Even though I knew you don't like loud sounds, I still-" he sighs, frustrated with himself, "I'm sorry..."

You pull away from his chest and look up at him, your eyes still wet and fresh tears threatening to spill, "I-I know you didn't yell at me. I shouldn't have reacted like that..." you say with a shaky voice. "I know you would never hurt me, I'm sorry".

That night, the two of you laid in bed and talked about everything and nothing at all. When you tried to tell him of the past, he stopped you, "Maybe next time..." he said. "I don't want you to revisit those memories right now".

As the two of you snuggle with each other, and you slowly drift off to sleep you can bearly hear the words that Kuroo says to you, "I'll always keep you safe, Y/n. I promise".

You slept without nightmares that night.

Also, extra, but the employee that messed up got an earful in the men's room on Monday, one place where Kuroo knew you wouldn't hear him lose his cool. Angry Kuroo may be hot to the general population (at least, those who found him attractive anyway) but ask that rookie, he had never wanted to die more than in that moment he was getting an earful.

OIKAWA

You had been dating Oikawa since you guys were young, since highschool. He had helped you get through all the tough times and knew what you feared and your trauma. 

He had always been careful not to raise his voice or speak with malice in front of you; he even made sure that Iwaizumi didn't resort to violence in front of you, and that Kyoutani stayed far far far away from you.

Surprisingly, there was no incident or episode outside of your home; but that also meant that he had never seen the extent your trauma and how it affects you.

When you guys were teens, he made you a promise that he will take you away from your toxic home and give you a life without worry and fear. He had kept his vow, and as soon as you two graduated, he helped you get admission in a university in Argentina, and you two moved out of Japan, never to look back on your terrible home and family.

Sometimes, when a long time passes, people tend to forget the promises of the past; the same had happened with Oikawa. Obviously, this didn't mean that he loved you any less, it was just that somehow as life went on that old promise from his young days buried itself in the back of his mind.

Oikawa was getting ready to leave for practice; you were following him around, reminding him of some things he needed to bring on his way home.

"Tooru, we're out of milk". Oikawa smiles, "Okay, babe, got it". "We don't have butter- you dropped your sock- and grapes". Oikawa sighed, slightly irritated, "Okay, Y/n," he mumbled. "Tooru, you're forgetting your sunscreen," "Yep, Thanks". "Put the dirty clothes in the laundry," "Done". "The neighbours wanted to have dinner, I'm gonna tell them we're going, okay?" "Cool, cool".

"You got some mail from the bank, you have to check it". "Will do it when I come back". "Also-" Oikawa growled, "Also what?!" he said annoyed. He didn't notice you flinch, "You've been nagging me about dumb shit all morning!" He turns his glare towards you, "I Just need ONE FUCKING MORNING TO MYSLEF!" as soon as he raises his voice, you stumble backwards and cover your face with your arms. 

The moment he sees you recoil, he is reminded of the promise he made way back. Oikawa is filled with guilt and instantly reaches for you, he feels so much pain when you flinch and move away as he tries to touch you.

Very slowly, he reaches for you again, placing his hand on your arm covering your face. He sighs in relief when you allow him to lower your arm, but he is soon feeling even more guilty when he sees hot tears streaming down your eyes."Y/n, baby I am so sorry," he almost whispers, afraid that you'll reel back if he dares make a sound any louder than a whisper.

"I shouldn't have yelled at you like that, I-I am so so so sorry Y/n, baby," he apologises and pulls you into a hug and allows you to cry into his chest.

He doesn't care if your tears are soaking through his jersey or he is getting deadly late for practice; his first priority is you. "I'm sorry!" you sob, old habit resurfacing after so long.

Oikawa gently moves you back and softly cups you cheeks, wiping away your tears with his thumbs, "Baby, please don't say sorry. I should be sorry! You were only doing your job".

You nod, wiping your tears and gently pushing his chest, "You're getting late," you tell him, your voice sounding wet, a sob threatening to break out at any moment. Oikawa pulls you back into the hug, "Screw that for now," he kisses the top of your head, "I can't leave you like this".

It doesn't take you long to calm down (Oikawa tried to make you laugh, "Y/n-chan! Punch me! You can kick the living shit outta me, I won't say anything, I promise! I deserve it anyway!"). Oikawa holds you close, rubbing your arms with his hands, "And?" he asks. "And?" you raise your brow, "What do you mean 'and'?"

Oikawa smiles awkwardly, guiltily, "You were going to say something before I decided to act like a dickhead". "Oh that!" "Yeah," he confirms.

"I was going to say, 'and I love you, take care'". Oikawa's face contorts with pain, guilt filling through his veins, he pulls you into a tight hug, "I love you too... Y/n- shit! I am so sorry!" You smile into the hug, "I forgive you".

"Fuck practice! let's do it!" "Get out". "Y/n-chan so mean!" 

[that-gt-and-vore-stuffs]

Experiment 05SB

Alternatively titled “I’m sorry 2B don’t hate me please”

I hath given in to the M4dc0m brain rot at the cost of me now having written a 7k+ word fic because I’m not confident enough in my art skills to draw it at the moment. Here we go!

Oh, there’s also implied fatal in this (it’s of unnamed characters, plus this is M4dc0m, but I’ve gotta say it. I guess you could take it as reformation if you really wanted to.). Mentions of blood I guess?

As always, Vore under the cut :)

“Ey 2b? You there?” Deimos’s voice crackled to life through the plastic earpiece currently jammed into his left ear, yanking the hacker and unofficial ‘team medic’ as he was called once (much to his own confusion. Sure, he knew basic medical but by no means was he any sort of doctor) back into reality. A brief moment passed in the silence of his room, more often called ‘the lab’, of their base before everything came crashing back at once. Deimos, Sanford, and Hank were out raiding a A.A.H.W warehouse at his instruction. Meaning he was alone in their base, also known as a breaking down appartement they had taken shelter in. It had electricity and provided shelter from the harsh hell scape that had once been the state of Nevada. A dark red sunless sky overhead, vegetation and any ecosystems completely wiped out from what they’d seen, bandits and zeds equally ready to eat the nearest person if it meant living another day, the Agency hunting you down if they thought you’d possibly be working against them or with the infamous Hank J. Wimbleton, and having little to no essential resources for days at a time to top it all off like some twisted cherry on this sick cake. Home sweet fucking home.

“Doc? Helllloooo?” Shit, right. Deimos.

“Sorry, I’m here. What is it Deimos?”

“And the medic lives!” The small cheer was accompanied by laughter from the smallest member of the team. Jebus, how was he able to joke in even the most dire situations?

“Just get to the point, chucklehead.” 2b could hear Sanford add in over the static, the man’s laughter just barely making it to tired ears.

“Right right, sorry man. Anyway, if we wanted to get food on the way back would you say no?” Pardon? There was no way he was hearing that right. There were several reasons why he couldn’t be hearing that right. A. food wasn’t by any means the easiest thing to come by in this hellhole, B. restaurants weren’t really a common thing anymore so those were out of the picture, and C. there’s no way they could p- actually, scratch that last one. Robbing a corpse wouldn’t be the weirdest thing that those three had done. Not by a long shot. Still though, how was he supposed to respond to that request?

“…what?” Apparently by asking the first word on his mind.

“We saw that one hotdog vendor on the way here and we’re all starving. Can we or can we not get hotdogs on the way back?” Oh. That’s what Deimos ment. How on earth had that hotdog vendor not been killed yet?

“Is this a genuine ‘we’ or is it a ‘me’, Deimos?” That seemed like a more fair and answerable question.

“Hey I-!”

“It’s a genuine ‘we’ Doc,” Sanford’s voice chimed in. By the cursing in the background 2b could imagine that he had flipped up Deimos’s mic to temporarily mute him in the realm of their earpieces. “Pretty sure one of our stomachs gave us away to the last group of agents we had to take out. Not gonna point fingers but I’m pretty sure it was Hank- Ack! I’m just saying!”

“Thought we weren’t pointing fingers.” There was the third voice. Rough from years of fighting yet still all too recognizable as Hank. The same Hank J. Wimbleton on the wanted posters that scattered the walls of almost every nearby building, wanted dead by the Auditor and his whole agency. He must’ve smacked Sanford for his comment. Well at least he didn’t do worse, whether on purpose or accident.

“We aren’t. Now Cmon Doc, you never answered my question.” Hearing the other hacker’s voice ask for an answer again 2b sighed. Always eager, wasn’t he? How the man had seemingly endless energy on missions would forever remain a mystery to him, Jebus be damned.

“I don’t really care what you do on the way back so long as you all come back in one piece and with the stuff I sent you there for. Understood?”

“Aye aye, Captain Doc! Over and out!” And there they went. The earpiece went dead, leaving 2b on his own once again once he flicked up his own mic. Back to silence. Sweet sweet silence. It wasn’t often they got that in their shared apartment of a base. Someone was always awake, someone was always saying something. It was never really quiet unless you were lucky enough to be the only one awake. 2BDamned had seen plenty of those rare times, if only because he overworked himself and didn’t sleep. So maybe it was one of his less than desirable qualities, when living in a hellscape being ten steps ahead of the agency trying to kill you is always good. He had to keep that up, on top of keeping the others alive and well.

And then there was his little experiment. That also was taking a toll on how little he slept. Not all that long ago the trio had returned from a mission with the data he had requested and more. Specifically a duffel bag full of seemingly shrunken grunts and two only slightly bigger shrunken MAGs. Pft, how funny it was to say that. A shrunken MAG. Hell, he wouldn’t believe it if you told him with no proof. The idea seemed insane. Oh but it wasn't. Not by a long shot if the cages sitting on one of his tables said anything. Normally he’d call such a thing like keeping people in cages inhumane, not that there were many humane things in this hellhole to begin with. He’d expect keeping them in cages that probably used to be for pets to be a move pulled by the Agency, not himself, however he had to make do with what they could find and had access to. Also known as: not much at all. He wanted to study them after all. Letting them free was just not an option.

Now that probably sounds bad, studying living beings like himself, but one couldn’t blame 2b when you considered his situation (at least he hopes one couldn’t). Somehow the Agency found a way to shrink living beings. That’s power that could be used against him and the others to make everything turn for the worst, something which he wanted to avoid at all costs. However, if one of his teammates or himself were to be shrunken on a mission it would be possibly lifesaving to know how to reverse the effects. Plus, having the power to shrink enemies on their side could certainly prove useful. All that being said, he needed these few alive in order to try and figure out what caused them to be how they were. Hence the repurposed, beat up pet cages. Two of them to be exact. One held the grunts and the other for the two MAG agents. None of them had killed each other yet, so that was nice. A few simple experiments and a dissection of a grunt that had been dead upon arrival to him proved that they still functioned as they would if they were their normal size. Just on a smaller scale. He had sent Hank, Deimos, and Sanford out for supplies today, yes, though if they found any information regarding the shrinking of their little ‘guests’ then they were to bring it to him. With no information on that though, he had to continue his other work. Tired eyes met the screen through red goggles. Moments later his head found itself cushioned in the crook of one of his arms.

“What the hell.” 2b grumbled, a fresh headache slowly starting to pound against the inside of his skull. What the hell was up with him? He should be fine. This was only his second day without proper ‘longer-then-15-minutes’ sleep. He’d gone longer before, he should be able to function. Why was the screen giving him such a headache now of all times? He needed to get stuff done. He needed to finish up this…this……what was he working on again? Hold on, no, he should remember. This shouldn’t be slipping his mind like it is. Maybe if he just thought back a few minutes. It would come back to him, right?

“Ok right before Deimos called, what was I doing?” 2b thought out loud to himself, trying his hardest to recall what had happened prior to the call from his allies. ”I was sitting here…then Deimos called in. Wait, no. Go back. From the top. Since…however long ago I’ve been sitting here, working on…what was I working on before Deimos asked about getting food? I sent them on the raid, didn’t eat, got to work and- no. That’s not it. Why can’t I just-“

Gggnnnnnnrrrr…

Oh well fuck him. That’s why he couldn’t focus. 2b groaned, not bothering to hide the noise as of now. He was alone, no one would hear him or tease him. Unless you would count the shrunken men in the cages, however it wasn’t likely they’d say anything. When you’re the size of a rat, spare the MAGs who were more rabbit sized, to your captor pissing them off seemed like the worst thing one could do. Clearly the hacker wasn’t at all in the mood to deal with teasing, so their mouths remained shut. That left 2b alone to deal with his complaining stomach, a feat which proved easier said than done when one was going off a day and a half without properly sleeping. He couldn’t even remember the last time he ate something. It was all just fuzzing together at this point.

Pushing himself off his desk 2b flopped back into the worn chair he’d been sitting in for God knows how long. Relaxing into the backrest was certainly more comfortable than being hunched over a laptop screen typing away like he had been for the past day or two. A hand fell to rest over his stomach while the other removed his goggles. Those were not helping the blooming headache. A low growl from his stomach drew a small hiss through his teeth, the sound being accompanied by a familiar empty cramping.

“Oh you can shut up.” He grumbled at the organ half heartedly, “It’s not like I can eat anything right now. There’s a reason I sent Hank and the others out.” His stomach growled back, the empty sound ringing in the hacker’s ears. He needed to eat, that was undeniable. The problem was getting something to eat. He had few options, none of which he particularly liked. Option 1. going out to look for something even slightly edible on his own, option 2. wait and hope the others found and brought back food, or option 3. contact the others through his headset and ask them to get him something on the way back. The first option was clearly undesirable on its own and the other two weren’t much better. Sure, asking them to grab something for him would probably be easiest and most logical, however he was almost certain that they didn’t want to hear that out of the blue in the middle of a fight. That and he didn’t want to deal with any teasing that might come along with asking. He wasn’t about to take that chance when he had things to do. He couldn’t remember those things at the moment, sure, but they were still things he had to do! So asking was not an available option at the moment. That left waiting and hoping for the best.

Rrrrrrrnnngggggg….

“I know. I don’t like the idea either.” 2b sighed as he spun around in his chair, gently patting his stomach. He needed to get out of his chair, even if it was just a walk around his room. He needed something after a day and a half straight of sitting there hunched over staring at a screen. Maybe it’d help with the headache if he was lucky. Probably wouldn’t but hey a man could dream. With a small grunt of effort the hacker found himself on his feet, his balance wobbling and legs feeling like brittle pasta beneath him. Ah, that's what I wanted to do earlier. Go figure taking breaks gets ignored by my brain. “However, I do believe it’ll end with the best result. I’m sure they’ll be home soon anyway.”

They wouldn’t. That was a lie, to himself and to his stomach alike. He likely had a few more hours alone, maybe two at least. The A.A.H.W warehouse he’d sent them to was big and if you account for fighting delays and them stopping on the way back then the chance of them being back in the next two hours would be some sort of miracle. By the way his stomach reacted every time he brushed over the thought that the trio was getting food on the way back then he wasn’t going to be looking so hot by the time they arrived back. Oh he was going to get the short end of the stick no matter what he did, wasn’t he? Talk about luck. 2b sighed, running a hand up and through his hair as he walked along one of the walls of his small room. His stomach clearly wasn’t shutting up any time soon so the next best course of action would be to ignore it. Maybe that would help him wait it out. What could he focus on? There was work, he could clean up a little bit maybe, or he could focus on the rattling coming from the cages and-

Hold on.

That most certainly wasn’t right. 2b cocked an eyebrow, crossing the room to where the three cages were placed. Quite the interesting scene was playing out before him. From what he could see a few of the shrunken grunts were teaming up to try and break out of the cages. This wasn’t their first little escape attempt, no, but it interested him enough as he stood there watching and attempting to grab his tablet at the same time. Eventually he had succeeded, opening up a new document to scribble down a few notes.

Title: Log 073SB

Time: 6:34 pm, xx/xx/xx

Author: 2BDamned

Note: Grunts working together to attempt escape. MAG agent seems to be attempting to cause a distraction by rattling the wall of the cage. Or perhaps they just want out. Very annoying either way. None seem bothered by my presence.

Satisfied with his little note, 2b closed the tablet and set it down on the counter next to one of the cages. Whether it was him being too rough with setting the tablet down or the low grumble from his stomach that startled the cage of grunts was up for debate, but currently he couldn’t find it in himself to care. Right now he needed to have a chat with the little troublemakers. Without hesitation the unofficial medic reached forward, opening the little hinged door located on top of the cage with ease compared to what the grunts inside were attempting before. He didn’t think twice before he reached in and grabbed the two topmost grunts from the pile of attempted escapees before retracting his hand, repeating the process with his other hand, and finally closing the cage. Hands now full, each holding two fighting bodies, the hacker sighed.

“Escape huh? How many times have you already tried that and it didn’t work?” 2b asked, a less than impressed tone lacing his voice. Sure, he needed a distraction from his stomach but he didn’t want to have to deal with escape attempts left and right for the next however long. “What made you think it’d go any different this time?”

There was a moment of silence before a soft voice spoke up, one that clearly hadn’t been used recently. One of the grunts in his left hand. “W-we figured i-if we actually tried and w-worked together then maybe we’d b-be able to manage a successful…e-escape…”

“Really now? Interesting.” 2b mumbled, looking over the grunt in his hand. They were all so small. You’d think he’d have gotten used to their size by now but every time he held one it seemed to slap him in the face. Offing them if they got too rowdy wouldn’t be hard at all. Wouldn’t need to use anything to begin with. How crazy it was. “Though I’m not sure I can let this slide as I have with previous instances.”

“W-what?” His response seemed to temporarily stun the four in his hands, most likely because of how it was different from his previous comments on their attempted escapes. A shiver passed over them like a wave while the hacker only nodded.

“Your previous attempts at escape. While I can understand why one would try I’ve made it quite clear that successful escapes won’t be happening nor tolerated, correct? I need to prove my point here because you all clearly don’t understand words.” He shifted on his feet slightly, a new question wracking his brain. What could he do to show he wasn’t going to deal with constant escape attempts? It had to be something that stuck, seeing as they clearly didn’t understand his earlier comments about escape not being tolerated. Only a few moments of silence passed before his lips were moving again. “You four are going somewhere else. A stronger holding space. If any of the others try anything they’ll join you. Simple, yet effective.” Or it would be if he knew exactly where he planned to stick these four. What did he have that could serve as a stronger cell for them? The cages were already pretty secure in terms of what he could work with. He just needed something stronger, close to him, hard to escape, and threatening that held a sense of danger with it. But what could that be? His eyes darted around the makeshift lab, trying to find something.

Grrrrroowwwllll…

2b’s eyes slowly scanned down from his shaking captives to his stomach. For a moment he just stared, eyes lacking any readable emotion. Well now that was certainly an option. It fit his criteria. Almost too well. Strong, hard to escape, close to him, and it held a sense of danger. Under his mask his torn and scared lips quirked up into a little smirk. “Mmhm. That’ll do quite nicely, in fact~”

The final moments of peace were shattered as the meaning of his words collided with his captives like a well aimed punch to the gut. Hearts sunk to their feet like rocks in water, despair rearing it’s head in their struggles. Those fortunate enough to remain in the cages simply watched with a muted horror as the four bodies were tossed onto the table and held down with little to no effort. The hacker wasted no time removing the mask and bandages that usually covered his mouth, tossing the fabrics haphazardly beside his discarded tablet. Despite the word fresh being the last thing he’d use to describe the Nevada air, 2b knew he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t nice to just breathe the air in alone and not through the layers of fabric like he often did. With the temporary roadblock now gone his eyes drifted downward to the bodies pinned beneath his hand.

“Well, I believe that eliminates any preventable issues we could encounter here.” He hummed softly, plucking the grunt who was covered by his hand the least up into the air. It certainly was odd to watch the little body squirm and fight against him, all attacks on the two fingers holding it proving futile. Their only hope seemed to be 2b letting them go, something which proved less and less likely the longer they studied the look in the hackers eyes. It wasn’t a look one ever wanted to find themself on the receiving end of. The sight of sharp teeth, glimmering with saliva through grinning lips, certainly did not help to lower the grunt’s heart rate at all. 2b simply clicked his tongue. “Meaning stalling time is up. Stay still, won’t you?”

The grunt did not, in fact, stay still. It was impossible to do so as far as they knew when you had a spit soaked tongue dragging up every inch of your front, sharp daggers of teeth only millimeters from their face. A deafening silence washed over the others, only being broken by a small pleased hum from their normal sized captor.

“Not bad…” the man mumbled, dragging his tongue up the squirming grunt yet again. A small voice in the back of his mind, his voice of reason, yelled out the obvious loud and clear to him plenty of times: this was wrong. It wasn’t right to be doing what he was about to do. This was stooping down to the bandits level, something he never intended to do unless absolutely necessary. He shouldn’t be enjoying the taste of another living being like this. And yet…here he was. Ignoring any logic and reason in his mind to proceed with this. Thank goodness he was alone. 2b didn’t even want to think about what the others might say if they were to see him how he was now. Shaking his head softly he shoved away the thought, opening his jaw as far as the joint and scarred tissue that made up his cheeks would allow. He wasn’t sure whether to be impressed or concerned with how easily the small body slipped into his mouth.

Despite their best efforts to squirm free of their new confinement, the slippery surroundings of the unofficial doctor’s maw proved to have horrible traction. Saliva dropped onto the unfortunate grunt’s head from above while they desperately tried to crawl out of the dark cavern. Feet scrambled on the soaked surface of their predator’s tongue as the muscle moved and flipped them around as if they were some piece of candy, all while their hands desperately tried to keep as little of them between the axe like teeth. One bite and they were done for, a terrifying thought. Through it all only three sounds were ever heard from those lucky enough to not be in the current grunt’s position. The sickening sounds of soaked struggle, terrified yelps from the grunt stuck within 2b’s jaws, and the occasional hum from the man himself. The torture, as those watching from the cage would describe it, seemed to continue for hours and hours on end.

Glk

Glp~

Until it all stopped with two simple swallows and a collective gasp of horror from those watching. The relaxed posture of the man they all watched failed to help their situation.

“H….huhh…that was..” the uncertified medic breathed, breaking the silence. His free hand lazily felt down his throat, tracing where he could feel the squirming body slip further down by the second. It didn’t take a genius to decipher that the less angry sounding gurgle from the man’s stomach signaled the end of the unfortunate grunt’s descent. With eyes widened just beyond his natural look 2b gently pressed his stomach. How interesting it was, as morbid as it might sound, to feel something squirming around inside the organ. Before he could even stop to consider a better way to word his thoughts, he finished his sentence. Just not in the way the grunts wanted to hear. “…incredibly easy.”

The last thing any of the remaining grunts wanted to see was those eyes scan up slowly before locking on them as if they were some sort of dessert. The clearly out of place smile on the man’s face didn’t help the feeling of impending doom either. If anything it only made it worse as a rough hand plucked another grunt from the selected three that had remained under his hand. Down, beneath his newfound curiosity and odd urge to continue what he was doing, 2b knew he should have been more concerned about how easy this was coming to him. No sane person would take so calmly to swallowing living beings, especially not of his own kind. Yet here he was, smirking as he licked over his scarred lips with cold eyes locked onto the small shaking body like a cat would after spotting a mouse. Looking at their sizes in comparison to one another? The simile was scarily accurate. Through his whole little mental debate the hacker found it all too easy to slip the small body into his mouth, licking it over to draw out as much of that strangely addicting taste before slowly beginning to nudge it back. Just bit by bit until it was far enough.

Glrk

Grk~

“Two down…haahhh…two to go…” the hacker sighed as he traced the lump down his throat. There was a waiting period once more but it didn’t last long before the shiver inducing gurgle signified where the poor soul had ended up. How the man hadn’t gotten sick yet was beyond the understanding of those who witnessed the event and even the man himself. Surely he should feel at least a little nauseous with two rat sized bodies squirming within his stomach. Nausea and fullness were the two sensations he had expected by now and yet neither had shown their face yet. Deep within his mind, from an area he didn’t even know existed until it spoke, a voice urged him to test his limits. 2b had shaken that idea off nearly immediately. As….enticing as that idea was, he still needed a few of the shrunken grunts alive and well to continue his attempts to recreate and reverse however the Agency had shrunken them before. Four however….well that wasn’t the biggest loss in the world if something happened to go wrong. Leaning a little more heavily over the table he grabbed one of the last two grunts, shoving the struggling body into his mouth head first. Quite the sight it was to watch flailing legs be slurped into someone’s mouth like nothing more than wet noodles. Interesting and horrifying.

Glp

Glrk~

Though compared to seeing someone who had been beside you ten minutes ago disappear down your captor’s throat as nothing more than a barely visible lump would top it in the scarring scale. Nothing could compare to that sight. Good god was it terrifying. The reality that escape was impossible was all but cemented into the remaining grunts' brains now, as that had been what had gotten their companions into this situation in the first place. This was happening because their capturer wanted to prove his point that attempted escape would not be tolerated. At this point they were convinced they’d have to have a death wish to attempt escape now. Especially when their conditions weren’t horrible compared to what they could be in, something which hadn’t crossed their minds till now. Now don’t take their words wrong, by no means did they want to stay here. Especially not now. However, if it meant living another day and not ending up as lunch? Staying definitely was the preferable option.

“One to go. Damn.” The hacker's voice snapped all attention back to him. His position had changed, now leaning back on the table as he looked over the struggling form in his hands. The words seemed to flow from his mouth without too much thought needed behind them. They just felt…right. It was a feeling he never expected to experience in such a context that he was now, much less to have it almost piloting him as it felt now, but he was nearly willing to say he welcomed it. He wasn't well acquainted with the idea of eating living beings after all, so the subconscious help to ease the process along wasn’t something he’d push away. Not unless it were to cause an issue that is. However, nothing of the sort had happened yet, meaning he was going to keep letting his actions flow naturally.

Just as he had with the three before this one, 2b wasted little time starting towards his goal. Raising the grunt just above his head the man dangled the flailing body over his open mouth, a sight that he could assume would terrify anyone in the grunt’s position. All went smoothly as he lowered the small body in. That is until the grunt, having seen an opportunity and taken it, grabbed and yanked down his mic. While he tried to react as quickly as possible, he could only pray the microphone had not managed to pick up the gag he’d made after panic and shock had caused him to jolt forward and send the grunt to the back of his throat. He flipped up the mic as fast as he could, trying to determine the best course of action one could take with a squirming body halfway down their throat and a possibility of having just been ratted out to the others by their lunch. He was screwed were they to find out, what with how at least two of the three always seemed to be looking for teasing ammunition. That and this….well this wasn’t exactly normal, you know.

“Doc? Is everything ok over there?” Fuck. That wasn’t good. Ignoring the sinking feeling of dread in his chest the best he could, 2b took a deep breath and forced the fourth grunt down with a swallow that took a little more effort then he felt it should’ve. Flipping down the mic, he answered.

“Damnit- yes. I'm fine, Sanford. Don’t worry.” The sentence had to be his least convincing lie yet. Between his heavy breathing and dryness in his throat he could tell his voice wasn’t helping him in any way. Now he didn’t take his teammates for idiots, despite how it sure seemed like they were sometimes, but in the moment he found himself wishing they were.

“You sure? You don’t sound all that fine. Did something happen back at base?” The worry beginning to lace the man’s voice through the static filled earpiece only served to worsen the feeling of dread in 2b’s chest. He needed to get Sanford, and the others who were no doubt listening, off the idea something had happened. He needed to deal with the whole I-just-swallowed-four-people-alive thing before they came back, so them returning early was not in the plan.

“No, nothing happened.” He shot back, only realizing the speed in his voice wasn’t too reassuring after he said it. Ok, what was a believable excuse for why he sounded like he did? “I just…spilt coffee on my legs after burning my mouth. Must’ve knocked the mic down in the process.” With a hand to his chest the hacker forced a soft swallow, trying to at least get rid of the uncomfortable dryness that had settled in the back of his throat. Please say they believed that.

“Pft, really? Damn, wish I could’ve seen that. Think you looked like one of those old cartoons, Doc?” Phew, crisis averted.

“Real funny, Deimos. Get back to your mission.” 2b shook his head at the comment. At least they seemed to believe him. It was worth it, even if the mental image of those over exaggerated cartoon characters was now going to show up whenever he even slightly burnt his mouth on coffee. Oh well, some sacrifices must be made.

“Alright alright. We’re going.” The man on the other end laughed. Those idiots. Damn his heart caring for them, now he was attached. “See you when we get back. Over and out, Doc!” And there they went.

Fighting off his own soft laughter, 2b flipped up his mic. A soft sigh escaped him before he could even think to stop it. That could’ve been horrible. While one hand softly rubbed at his neck, sore from what he had to guess was the miniature disaster that just took place, the other gently laid itself over his stomach. The four inside never seemed to stop moving, constantly squirming and slipping about. There were a handful of reasons he could assume was the cause, though the most likely was that being shoved into a soaking wet moving sack with three of your colleagues provided little traction or ability to get comfortable. That and panic. Panic was probably a rather big factor in how they were feeling. 2b, on the other hand, had to be feeling the exact opposite of how they were. The warm weight of his four ‘victims’ was a welcome sensation within the previously empty pit of his stomach. As twisted as he knew it sounded, he would’ve been confident saying that what he was feeling was honestly satisfactory. Why having living beings stretch and actually round out his stomach in a barely noticeable way was causing this feeling was a mystery to him, but at the moment he couldn’t find it in himself to care. Not when it felt this nice.

“I hope I’ve made my point clear.” The unofficial medic hummed, looking over to the grunt filled cage. They had backed away from him by now, huddled in the back most corner of their confines. The sight drew a genuine laugh from the man they all seemed to fear ten times more than before. Well that was proof if he’d ever seen it. Looks like their escape wasn’t something he had to worry about any more. So maybe he sacrificed a little of his ‘I’m not going to hurt you’ act for this. It was worth it in his eyes. And besides, he was probably the most gentle with them out of his whole little gang. If they wanted to be left with one of the others then go ahead. Although being left with the mercenary who you were created to kill didn’t sound like the most fun time to him. Smirking, he collected his goggles, mask, and tablet from the table. “It seems I have. Glad we could have this little -hic!- chat. Heh.”

He gave the cage a pat, the rattling of the metal only serving to scare the grunts further back in the ball of bodies they’d curled into, before turning to walk back to his desk. He needed to sit down. Standing apparently became a lot harder when you had four people fighting against your insides. Thinking back, he didn’t know what he would have expected. Did he stumble a little bit trying to get back to his desk? Yes, he did. It was like he forgot how to walk in all honesty. Another reason he was glad he was alone in their base. Like most things though it proved worth it when he finally collapsed into the worn chair he used for work. Without thinking twice he opened his tablet and started a new log.

—————————

“Doc! We’re back!” The call rang out through the appartement, followed by three sets of footsteps marching their way in and the door slamming shut perhaps a little stronger than needed. As the hinges of the door stopped rattling the three expected to hear a displeased groan, followed by the ruffled form of 2b appearing in the hallway to scold them for being so aggressive or something like tracking blood into the base. Honestly, why he still bothered was a mystery to them, at least Sanford and Deimos for they had zero clue what went on in Hank’s head, for the most part. They were mercenaries, fighters, people looking to not end up with their brains splattered on the wall or something worse. They were going to be bloody upon returning, even if that blood wasn’t their own. It wasn’t like their floors were carpet or anything either. In the end though they never bothered to fight the scoldings. No use making the unofficial medic mad, especially if they needed help. The lack of disgruntled medic in the hallway or at least yelling when silence returned to the room was worrying. After a minute or two with nothing spoken and no ruffled hacker to be seen, Deimos tried again to call him.

“2b?” He called out, peering down the hallway which led to their rooms. There wasn’t any blood on the walls, a good sign to start, and no bullet holes that weren’t there before. Unless the Agency suddenly learned how to do stealth missions, something he and he knew the other two were hoping wasn’t the case, he had hopes. Again, no response from the man. Gun still in his hand he took one glance back to the others, a silent ‘follow me’, before continuing down the hallway. Although Deimos had made it to the closed door first he’d been pushed past by the red goggle wearing giant as he reached for the doorknob. Hank had been the one to open the door to 2b’s room. He’d also been the first of the trio to feel the tension in his shoulders drop. It wasn’t long after he had relaxed that he was shoved into the room by two bodies trying to get in and see any damage that could’ve been done while they were gone. The sight of 2BDamned softly snoring away in his chair, nothing in the room seeming out of place, was most certainly a welcome one.

“Ah. So that’s why he isn’t barking us up a tree for your entrance, Dei.” Sanford hummed with a laugh, careful to watch his volume. If there was one thing he didn’t want to deal with after their mission it was a cranky Doc who got woken up by them. It wasn’t a secret he didn’t necessarily sleep after all and there was no way he could survive off coffee like he seemed to silently claim he could sometimes. They all had times when their sleep schedules were fucked.

“Oh shut up, ‘Ford.” Deimos shot back with a playful punch to the man’s bicep. “It’s not like I’m the one who slammed the door. That’s what he would’ve been on our asses about.”

“You slammed it open then yelled loud enough for all of Nevada to hear you. Don’t act like you’re innocent!”

As the two’s words morphed into friendly bickering Hank took it upon himself to deliver the bit of what they got that couldn’t stay in the duffle bag slung over his shoulder at the moment. Buried in the pocket of his jacket was a small object. Something he hadn’t expected to find, but had snagged nonetheless when it had been pointed out by Deimos. For a second as he walked over to the man a rough hand dug around fabric, fingers gripping plastic as he arrived at his destination. Without thinking he tossed the USB onto the hacker’s desk, eyes wandering over small things like the empty coffee mug or discarded goggles. Behind red-tinted goggles they landed on the man’s tablet, the screen now illuminated thanks to what he could assume had been the small drive hitting the desk. Prying wasn’t something he often did when it came to his teammates, respecting their privacy as they often did his, but after a certain word caught his eye he couldn’t help but read the log that had popped up.

Title: Experiment 05SB

Time: 7:42 pm, xx/xx/xx

Author: 2BDamned

Note: I…cannot believe I’m about to write this. This is update one of Experiment 05SB, an experiment started without much if any bit of a proper plan behind it. Phase I, I suppose you could call it, was a success. The shrunken grunts are, in fact, small enough to swallow whole and…alive. MAGs have not yet been confirmed to be the same way, though I’m sure that answer will show itself one day. I am unsure why I am able to keep four of them down without feeling nauseated, but I can. I will update at a later time when more information has presented itself.

The log ended there, eyes falling away from the screen as Hank’s mind worked to process the information it had just been given. According to what had been written before the man had fallen victim to sleep, it was not only possible to swallow the shrunken beings sitting in one of the cages behind him, but the unofficial doctor had done it himself. Four times to be exact. Curiosity grabbed control of his eyes, slowly panning them up to the cage of grunts who looked noticeably more terrified than they usually did. Had they seen the whole thing go down? His mind continued to wander, finding new questions like how on earth the hacker had managed to keep living and no doubt moving beings down like the log said he did. That is unless he’d spit them up before falling asleep. However that seemed highly unlikely-

“Snooping around Doc’s stuff, are we Hank~?” When Deimos had appeared behind him was beyond the mercenary, though the shock of hearing his voice out of the blue was enough to startle him into quickly powering off 2b’s tablet and whipping around to face the two that now stood across with him with far too smug looks on their faces for his liking.

“Woah there, big guy! We didn’t mean any trouble.” Sanford cooed, the fucking Chad cooed, holding his hands up as if he was under some sort of arrest. “Just wanted to know what you were reading over here is all~.”

“Yeah, exactly. I never expected to find you clicking through Doc’s diary.” Deimos added on nearly flawlessly. Sometimes he really hated how well they worked together. Namely when it was against him. “So, was it a love confession~?”

Hank sighed, glaring at the two through his goggles. He sure fucking hoped they could see the look on his face, despite most of it being covered by bandages and his mask. Because he was not amused and he wanted them to know it.

“No, not a love confession, you morons.” He groaned, shaking his head. Telling them straight off what it said would probably be horrible. At the moment he was still having a few difficulties understanding parts of what he read. Lying just seemed like the best choice overall. It wasn’t like he’d be the only one doing so, after all. It sure seemed like 2b did to them over the mic. Speaking of the man, Hank turned around to take a good look at him. At first glance he seemed like he normally did when he passed out in his chair from overworking himself like this. It was only when Hank took an extra second to look and let the information in his brain guide him did he see the slightly out of place softness around the sleeping hacker’s stomach. Unable to help himself Hank felt his ruined remaining lip quirk up into a small smirk under his mask as he turned around to shove the Dumbass Duo out of the room so 2b could sleep.

“Bunch’a nonsense, is all. Now move. I don’t wanna deal with him if you idiots wake him up and we still have shit to put away.”

[onlydreamofmysoul]

Let Them Eat Cake: The Final

We made it! I want to thank you guys so so much for the fantastic support you've given this story, it means the world to me. Bake Off has a special place in my heart and so does this fic, so its been so great to share it with you all!

(Links to all previous chapters can be found pinned on my page under 'Let Them Eat Cake' or pop over to my AO3 - link in bio)

Without further ado, I give you... The Final!

This week on the final of The Great British Bake Off…

“It looks like you’re having a smashing time.”

“Tell us about your first kiss.”

“And the winner is…”

Remus Lupin was having a nice morning.

There had been nothing of interest to note, however he didn’t have an alarm blaring and he was warm and snuggly, so all in all, he took it as a win.

Until one Lily Evans took it upon herself to sneak into his room and throw herself on him like she was a kid on Christmas morning.

“Finals, finals, finals!” She exclaimed, managing to find a tone that was somehow both singing and chanting all at once.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” Remus groaned, covering his eyes with his forearms. “Can I go back in time and just never apply to this fucking competition?”

Lily rolled off him, her big green eyes staring at him concerned. “What's the matter? Do you not want to be here?”

Remus peeked out at her. “No, I don’t want you to be here.” He smirked as she rolled her eyes, flopping back on the pillows next to him.

“Asshat.” She grumbled, hitting his shoulder with a light ‘thwack’. “I was worried for a sec.”

Remus grinned at her and then stared up at the ceiling for a long moment, only the sounds of their breathing and his heartbeat in his ears to keep him company.

Finals, they had made it to the finals.

He still couldn’t quite believe it. “Welcome to the finals.” McGonagall had said to him just before he left the tent, the words playing over and over again in his head, as clear as if she had said them yesterday.

(Which in fact, she had. This was the first time Remus would go to the practice tent and Tonks wouldn’t be there, but there was still an undeniable elation blossoming in his chest).

Five days until filming resumed. Six until the winner was announced. It didn’t seem real.

(But if this were a fantasy, Remus never wanted to return to reality).

“So where’s Sirius on this fine morning?” Lily asked, breaking the silence. Remus turned his head to look at her, completely relaxed and sinking into the bed. It would seem his lazy morning mood had seeped into her instead of her vibrant energy going to him.

“We’re not together every night.” He said, looking at the freckles splashed across her nose. They were darker now than they had been when they arrived. “We’re taking things slow.”

Lily just stared at him sceptically.

“It’s true!” He defenced. “We are!”

“You’re such a bad liar.”

“Am not!”

“Are too!”

Remus groaned and smacked her with a pillow. Victory.

“You never answered the question.” Lily said, muffled under the cushion. Or maybe victory had another champion in mind.

“Okay yes, he’s here most nights, but it doesn’t feel fast.” He defended, and it was true. Somehow it felt almost like they had known each other forever and yet still there was the thrill and excitement that came with everything being so new.

“It doesn’t seem fast either.” Lily reassured. “Maybe for others it would be, but I think it’s right for you two.”

Remus let out a little breath of relief. He hadn’t been worried exactly, but his thoughts had slipped in that direction a few times. More than anything, he just worried about scaring Sirius off, while still feeling secure in himself? Remus really didn’t know, the emotion centre of his body was really sending out mixed signals these days.

He had just decided to say fuck it to logic and stick to how he felt. And he felt good. Really good.

“Not that this little revelation wasn’t nice,” Lily said, “But you still haven’t answered the question I asked. Little tip? If this baking thing doesn’t work out, definitely don’t become a spy. If you were captured you’d accidentally reveal all the information without them even having to ask you.”

Remus groaned. “I hate you. He and James were hanging out last night.”

Lily grinned, satisfied and gave Remus another little shove. “Okay, come on I wanna go bake.”

“You’d think you’d have enough baking for a lifetime.” Remus grumbled but he got up all the same. In actuality, now that he was awake, Remus too was buzzing to get into the tent and get to work. “What’re you planning for this week?” He asked as he threw on a pair of jeans and a hoodie, having taken a shower the night before.

“I can’t give away my secrets!” Lily teased, holding open the door as Remus grabbed his key and they both swept out of the room and down the plush carpeted corridor.

“You are aware I’m gonna find out either way right? Cause if you still haven’t grasped that concept then I’m a little worried to be-”

“Oh hush,” Lily laughed, pressing her palm to Remus’ mouth. “I’m still not a hundred percent sure to be honest.”

They stepped outside, the cool crisp air falling over them, revitalizing them. Remus tucked his hands into his pockets and felt his shoulders hunch a little. His lungs liked the cold, the rest of his body - not so much.

“I’m not sure if I know what I’m doing either.” He admitted. “I have a few ideas, but none of them feel quite right, you know?”

Lily nodded as they reached the practice tent, pulling open the door. “Yeah I think that’s my issue too. There’s suddenly so much pressure and nothing I consider seems to be good enough.”

Remus sighed as he pulled two aprons off the hooks and tossed one to Lily. “I suppose we’ll have to figure it out.” He said, before taking out the recipe cards he had brought with him and began flicking through them for inspiration.

Five days. He could do this.

“Well, well, well, look who we have here.” Remus said with a grin as he trod through the grass, rounding the big oak tree to see Sirius waiting on their swing.

“I know,” Sirius drawled. “It’s almost like we planned it.”

Remus smiled, sitting by his side, holding the rope in one hand as he held out a Tupperware encased offering. “Want some cake?”

Sirius took the box gladly, his hair tied up but the wind had claimed a few loose strands, whipping them around his face like a dark halo. “Always. What kind?”

Remus tucked one foot into his chest, resting his cheek on his knee as he studied the other man. “Try it and find out.”

Sirius' lips quirked at Remus’ teasing tone, looking at the deep brown colour that really could only be one flavour. “Elderflower?” He joked.

Remus laughed and took a bite himself before holding out to Sirius. “Yes,” He said, completely deadpan. “That’s exactly what it is.”

Sirius smiled and kissed him, biting his lip as he pulled away. “You taste like chocolate.”

Remus flushed. “Don’t you mean elderflower?”

Sirius chuckled, rocking the swing a little more, tilting his head back to look at the twisting branches above them. “Look,” He murmured, pointing to a clump of twigs high in the tree. “A bird's nest.” Remus followed his line of sight and watched as a bird swooped overhead and landed in it gracefully.

“That was kinda cool.”

“Let’s hope it doesn’t shit on us.”

“Sirius!” Remus exclaimed, elbowing the other man as he laughed. “Let’s hope your hair can take the hit and shield us.”

“Oi! My hair is what should be protected at all costs, it’s a national treasure. You know, I think I should replace you with Tonks, she knows the importance of hair care.”

Remus smiled, resting his head on Sirius’ shoulder, the fabric of his jacket soft against his cheek. “Tell me something I don't know about you.”

The wind whipped through the branches, but Remus wasn’t cold pressed up against Sirius. The tree sheltered them from the worst of it and the weather was slowly getting a little warmer, daffodils springing up all around the tent. There were many things Remus had always wanted but never saw himself actually achieving. Coming to bake off was one. Making it to the final was another. And perhaps the most notable - finding someone who might love him as much as he loved them. And yet, here he was with all three.

“When I was a kid, I used to want to be a dog so bad, I was always getting in trouble for wearing holes in my pants because I would crawl instead of walking normally. I even refused to answer to ‘Sirius’.”

“Oh yeah?” Remus asked, amused. “What was your alter ego’s name then?”

He could hear Sirius’ smile even if he couldn’t see it. “Padfoot. He was this big black dog. I got the idea after I read about ‘The Grimm’ in one of my cousin’s books and I guess it kind of stuck.”

“Padfoot,” Remus repeated, unable to stop himself. “I like that.”

“Your turn,” Sirius urged, nudging Remus lightly. “Tell me something I don’t know about you.”

Remus’ heart fluttered, stomach rolling a little, he had news for Sirius, and had honestly engineered the entire conversation just to tell him, but now that the moment was here, he was getting nervous.

“I’ve been offered a job in London.”

Sirius froze under Remus’ cheek. “In London?”

“Yeah.”

“London, England?”

Remus chuckled as he sat up to look at Sirius’ stunned face, grey eyes wide, lips parted. “Yes, London, England.”

Sirius blinked. “But I live in London.”

Remus pursed his lips, trying not to smile too much. “I’m aware of this, yes.”

“You… we… we’d be living in the same country. In the same city.”

“That’s what I’m saying.”

“Remus motherfucking Lupin, that's the best thing I’ve heard all week.”

“Your flour is about to tip over.” Tonks commented, carelessly filing her nails over facetime as Remus ran around his station, trying to do several things at once.

“Oh my god Lupin, you’re a disaster, how did you even get into this competition?” Tonks teased as Remus caught the flour but promptly dropped it on the flour, a white cloud erupting, coating everything in a two meter radius in powder.

“Not very helpful.” Remus grumbled as he shook flour out of his hair and grabbed a cloth to wipe down the counter.

“I wasn’t trying to be helpful.” Tonks paused and looked at the recipe Remus had sent her. “You’re gonna need at least double the vanilla extract than what you have there.” Remus grabbed the recipe and looked it over, seeing she was right. “See?” Tonks said gleefully as Remus scratched out the original amount. “That was me being helpful.”

Remus rolled his eyes, but blew her a kiss, wiping the dusty screen of his phone which had not escaped the great flour disaster.

“Come on,” He said as he walked with his phone to the store room, as if Tonks had any other choice than to accompany him. “We’re gonna get some more flour.” He set his phone down on a shelf as he looked for the right flour, Tonks chatting away. If Remus closed his eyes he could almost pretend she was right there with him, the pair of them practising for whatever challenges they were soon to face.

“So where’s Lily on this fine evening?” Tonks questioned. “Don’t you two usually practice together around now?”

“Yeah,” Remus grunted as he picked up his phone, tucking it under his chin with his hands full. “But she was busy tonight.”

“No fucking way, she’s with James?”

“Well, I don’t know for sure.” Remus admitted, “But she sounded pretty suspicious.”

“Ooh.” Tonks gasped and Remus began carefully measuring flour and continuing where he left off. “All the Bake Off love this year.”

Remus laughed as he folded in his sugar, putting the batter in the oven before beginning to prepare the icing. “Oh hush you.”

Tonks just winked, sticking out her tongue. “You know you love me.”

“Ladies and gentlemen, I am pleased as punch to welcome you to this year's Great British Bake off; the final!”

Sirius groaned, head tipping back at James’ enthusiastic introduction. “You did not just say ‘pleased as punch’.”

James feigned being hurt, placing a hand over his heart. “What would you prefer? Pleased as pudding? Pleased as pie?”

Sirius looked straight into the camera, his face blank but his amused eyes giving him away. “Someone please give me a new co-host, I can’t take this anymore.”

James laughed as he threw an arm over Sirius’ shoulder, the two of them easing the nerves of everyone in the tent tenfold. “Don’t worry Sirius darling, you haven’t got too long left with me because, like I said, we’ve reached the final!”

Remus smiled, hiding the hands he was wringing together under the table. It was the weirdest feeling - he was at once completely calm and so incredibly nervous. He couldn’t help but giggle at the antics of the infamous marauders and recalled that morning, lying in bed when Sirius had queried how much bullshit he’d be able to spout without any prior preparation. Remus had told him to go get ready but had promptly led them to activities that were in no way helpful to the rest of the day's events.

(It had been a good way to start the day though).

McGonagall and Dumbledore stood at the front of the tent, looking out at the eerily empty work stations, only three now filled. Remus and Lily were in the front two and Kingsley had come up to slot in behind Lily.

“We have a very exciting two days lined up,” Sirius said as he clasped his hands together, a natural in front of the cameras. Our bakers have no overall theme, so we’re going to get to see a little splash of everything!”

“For our signature challenge, our bakers have been asked to bake something that fits in with the theme of ‘final’’.” James said, taking his turn to speak again. “It can be anything from a cake inspired by the final book in a series or the last thing you had to eat, because tonight, there are no limits other than your imagination.”

Remus snorted and Sirius’ eyes found his as he elbowed James lightly. “Dramatic much.” He drawled before rubbing his hands together gleefully. “Are you ready?”

“On your marks,”

“Get set.”

“Bake!”

Remus hadn’t realised how much he would miss Tonks in the tent. He had missed her all week, but it wasn’t as if they ever had much chance to chat while they were filming, so he had thought it would be a little easier. But the tent was unusually quiet without her clattering at her station, inevitably breaking at least one piece of crockery per challenge.

“It’s too quiet,” Lily murmured, echoing Remus’ thoughts. “I almost feel like we’re not allowed to talk.”

Remus chuckled, remembering exams in home economics when he had been in secondary school and the teacher who would happily dole out zero marks if she so much as saw your lips move.

He grinned, taking a bowl he didn’t need from his station and ‘accidentally’ dropping it on the ground, the ceramic splitting with a loud crack.

“Oops!” He said loudly, glad he hadn’t ever tried to go into the theatre business, he was truly a terrible actor, and ran to grab a broom, not without winking at Lily who blew him a kiss.

“Much better, thanks!” She yelled after him and he just chuckled, disposing of the broken bowl, but not without slipping a shard into his apron pockets to take home with him as a little reminder.

Sirius meandered over after a little while as Remus put a tin in the oven to cook the soon-to-be sponge fingers for his tiramisu.

“You seem to be having a smashing time.” Sirius teased, his eyes alight.

“James already made that joke a few weeks ago.” Remus said laughing as he poured double cream into a bowl. “It’s really not that funny.”

Sirius just stuck out his tongue and moved to the next station, but Remus knew that had it been just the two of them, it was far more likely that Sirius would have taken much offence to the attack on his sense of humour, and a good snog would have been needed to make up for it.

James arrived no sooner than Sirius had left, peering into the bowl of ingredients that Remus was whipping, looking very much like he was contemplating dipping his finger in for a taste.

Marlene arrived, camera on her shoulder, surveying Remus’ station, sceptically watching Remus grate his dark chocolate.

“So Remus,” She began, fiddling with the lens to zoom in on his hands. “What has tiramisu got to do with the ‘final’ theme?”

“Well,” He said, suddenly feeling shy, wishing he didn’t have to explain. “Tonks, Andromeda Tonks, that is, had been planning to make a tiramisu for this episode, but she unfortunately was eliminated last week, so instead I’m making it.”

Some of the crew members cooed softly and Remus rolled his eyes, even as he blushed. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m a big softie.” He glanced at Marlene once, smirking, then returned to his work, “Now fuck off and let me get on with it.”

“One of these days, Remus motherfucking Lupin,” Marlene grumbled as she walked away, not before snagging a square of chocolate to munch on, “One of these days I’m going to get you back.”

Remus’ dish was made pretty quickly, the most important part was leaving it in the fridge for as long as possible, so as soon as he had carefully layered the sponge and cream and chocolate of course, he set the fridge to the lowest temperature and put the big dish in. He had an idea of how he wanted to present it, but that all depended on whether or not it would be set properly.

He cleaned his station and set up everything he needed for when the dessert was set, but that only took ten minutes. Watching Lily and Kingsley rush around their stations while Remus had nothing left to do made him feel like he was back in school, the horrid panic of completing a test, thinking it was easy, then looking up to discover everyone else was still working intently. He put himself to work to avoid the fluttering in his chest, different to the loved up buzz he had been experiencing recently, no this tightness was more akin to the ‘oh no have I had ten shots of espresso’ variety. Remus wasn’t the biggest fan.

He made tea for the crew, including the judges and presenters, checked the progress of his dish, then made himself walk away from the fridge, lest he open it too often and slow down the cooling process. He chatted with Lily a bit while she worked and did an interview with James and Sirius, some more filler content now that there weren’t nearly as many bakers to keep up with, but the airing time of the show hadn’t changed.

“Need a hand?” He offered, turning to Lily who was crouched by her oven, gazing intently at her cake. “Nah I’m good.” She said, not looking up, “I don’t have anything to do until this little guy is cooked.”

“They never tell you how much waiting around there is.” Remus groaned, hopping up on his worktop. “I have been just sitting here for the best part of over an hour and I bet none of this is going to make the final cut.”

“You’d be right there!” Marlene chimed in, passing them on her way to video whatever complicated technique Kingsley was currently demonstrating. Remus raised an eyebrow at Lily, sighed and jumped off the counter. “I’m gonna check on my cakes now, thank you very much.”

Remus both loved and hated how there was no official ranking for the first challenge. He definitely loved it on days where he hadn’t done very well and didn’t want his failings it be broadcasted even more than they already had been, but today, with only three contestants left and the competition tangible, he wanted to know how much more impressive his next two bakes were going to have to be.

He supposed it didn’t really matter - he was going to do his very best no matter what.

Lily had made a cake shaped like a knitted hat, the piping terrifyingly realistic, in commemoration of the last hat her grandmother had made before she passed away. Kingsley had a coffee flavoured graduation cap to honour his girlfriend who was in her final year of college.

“We’re a bunch of sentimental saps.” Lily muttered to them both as they all walked out of the tent to go for lunch, the judges' praises ringing in their ears. They all seemed to be standing on equal footing for now.

“I know,” Remus groaned, throwing himself down on the grass under the sun. “I should have just done like, the final countdown or something.”

“Tonks is never gonna let you live this down.” Kinsley piped in.

“God, don’t remind me. I might just have to kill her before the episode airs, you know, save my reputation and all.”

“Oh, a spot of murder, how lovely.” James chirped as he and Sirius arrived, having been sent to retrieve all of their lunches, the three bakers claiming that they were too tired and as they always fed everyone else, it was time to switch it up.

James passed out sandwiches, pulling them from a bag, while Sirius handed Remus a salad.

Remus kissed Sirius on the cheek, “Thanks sweetheart.”

It took Remus a moment to realise what he had done, a moment more to remember that it was only Kingsley who hadn’t already known about their relationship. Kingsley who was looking very nonchalant and in no way surprised.

“Oh,” He said between bites, looking at Remus and Sirius’ panicked looks. “Was this meant to be a secret?”

Remus just burst out laughing, any tension that had appeared, vanishing in seconds. “I suppose we’re not very good at hiding it, huh?”

“Oi, speak for yourself.” Sirius jostled as he unwrapped his sandwich. “I’m an excellent secret keeper.”

“Alright everybody, welcome to the technical challenge of this year’s final!” James reintroduced them, everyone having returned to their stations, fresh aprons tied around their waist and judges standing at the top of the room watching over the proceedings.

“For our last technical challenge, the judges are asking you to make a classic sponge cake, but with a little twist.”

Remus eyed the mysterious pile of ingredients under the cloth on his table. He both loved and hated that blue and white gingham pattern, hated it because he wasn’t the biggest lover of surprises, and loved it because… well, because it was cute.

(Not every answer was super deep. The Pinterest boy in him was in love with the entire aesthetic of The Great British Bake Off).

“Our lovely judges have also requested that you make at least twelve meringue kisses to top your sponge cake.”

Remus raised his eyebrows in surprise - it wasn’t like the judges to add anything to something as classic as a sponge cake, but who was he to question? This was the final, anything was possible.

James and Sirius chattered on for a few more minutes, and then they were off, the three contestants whipping off their gingham cloths like a magician unveiling his assistant. Remus barely glanced at the vague recipe before setting off to make the meringues first. Their small size was deceptive and that’s why Remus thought the judges had included them - but they would take the most time to bake and cool.

He set about whipping egg whites and sugar as Marlene arrived by his side, taking a moment just to pan the camera over everything he was doing.

“Meringue kisses,” Marlene said, with a smug sounding tone. “Such a cute name. Go on Remus, tell us about your first kiss.”

Remus laughed, caught off guard, nearly spilling the extra sugar he was adding to the bowl. “Alright, which first kiss do you want to hear about? Cause technically I have a few.”

Marlene giggled with him and Remus felt like he was a schoolgirl, chatting about boys and kisses, like they were the beginning and end of everything. “The very first one.”

Remus could help but laugh again, shaking his head fondly at the memory. “It was awful.” he said, chuckling to himself. “I was thirteen and I kissed this girl called Mary on a dare.” He paused to look at the camera more directly. “Mary if you’re watching this, I’d apologise but we both know I’m right. That was a shit kiss.”

Remus grinned as he realised Marlene was going to let that explicative slide for the purpose of the story. Victorious at last.

“What about your other ‘first’ kisses.” Marlene prompted, overall looking thoroughly delighted by the stories. Remus paused for a moment to stop his mixer and run a spatula around the edge of the bowl to ensure everything was mixing well, before turning the mixer back on and stepping back.

“Well my first kiss with a boy was a year later and since my previous make-out experience consisted of the one kiss you already know about, I think it’s fair to say; that was pretty crap too.” He grinned at Marlene and started measuring the butter for his cake. “But it did solve the whole ‘sexuality crisis’ thing I had going on, so that was fun.”

He deemed his meringue mix whipped-enough so he carefully spooned batches into an icing bag and began piping tiny amounts onto a baking sheet.

“Then I suppose, there’s your first kiss with someone who really matters,” He said carefully, not looking up from his work. “With the person who’s so amazing that every kiss feels a little bit like the first one. Kinda makes you feel like every other kiss you’ve ever had was just practice for this exact moment.”

Remus was aware that his cheeks were a little pink, but then again, when were they not?

“And you’ve found that person?” Marlene asked softly, as Remus piped his last little swirl. He didn’t have to think about it, but he did suppose he should tell the person in question before quite literally broadcasting it to the nation. So instead he just winked.

“Sirius,” Remus said softly, later that night as they lay in bed, a movie playing in the background, Remus’ adrenaline still high from winning the technical challenge. “I know it’s early, so I'm not expecting anything back but since I might have just heavily implied it on national television I figured I should probably tell you that I’m in love with you.”

Sirius’ head didn’t move from Remus’ chest, instead he reached out and grabbed Remus’ free hand, pressing his knuckles to his soft lips. “I know.”

“You do?” Remus asked incredulously, trying (and failing) not to splutter.

Sirius chuckled, his voice deep. “Yeah, you said it in your sleep last night. Plus, I watched over the footage from today and I saw.”

Remus blushed. “Oh.”

Sirius twisted in his arms so Remus could finally see his eyes. They were sparkling and a playful smile twisted on Sirius’ lips.

“I love you too, you know.” Sirius said casually, as if commenting on the weather. Remus let his head drop back onto the pillow as a whoosh of relief escaped his mouth. Sure he hadn't expected to have Sirius say it back but this feeling was like nothing he had ever experienced before.

“Well no, I didn’t, actually.” Remus quipped, much to the ceiling’s amusement. “But it’s good to know.”

Suddenly Sirius was leaning over him, his hair falling around their faces like a dark curtain. “So are you gonna kiss me or what?”

Remus bit his lip, failing in his attempt not to smile. “Nah,” He said, a blatant lie as he raised himself onto his elbows and pressed their lips together. Sirius twisted so he could support himself on one arm, cupping Remus’ face with the other. “I loved what you said earlier,” He murmured against Remus’ lips. “About the first kiss thing. And I really, really love you.”

Remus just grinned against Sirius’ lips and pulled him closer. “Love you too. Now shut up and kiss me.”

“What’re you looking all smug about?” Lily teased, bumping their hips together as they strolled down to the tent. Remus had so many reasons for the butterflies in his chest, he could hardly stop his hands from shaking, but the smile hadn’t left his face since he woke up.

“Oh you know,” He said, waving his hand in feigned nonchalance. “I’m just a boy in love.”

“Fuck off, you said ‘I love you’?” Lily asked, her voice going up an octave.

“Mhm,” Remus confirmed, nodding. “So now you need to woman-up and kiss James fucking Potter like we both know you’ve wanted to do since the first day.” Lily looked as if she might protest, but Remus cut her off. “We both know I’m right. Plus, it’s fairly obvious that the feeling’s mutual, so for the love of all things holy, put the rest of us out of our misery and just snog the poor bugger.”

Lily laughed, even as she blushed and tried to shrug Remus off. “You know,” She started, shooting him a glare that was in no way intimidating. “I’m really not sure I like ‘in love Remus’.”

Remus just winked and kissed the top of her head, smirking wickedly. “I think we both know that’s a lie.”

“It’s here, the final.”

“We’ve already completed half of the final James.”

“Yeah but this is like… the final part of the final.”

“Someone please tell me why I’m friends with this bloke.”

“Oi!”

“Anyways!” Sirius interrupted. “I suppose James wasn’t fully wrong. We made it to the final stretch.”

“It’s time,” James took over, “For my personal favourite challenge. The showstopper.”

Sirius clasped his hands together in front of himself and Remus had to stop himself from staring at the movement. “For our final showstopper, our judges would like to see you recreate a memory.”

“It could be anything,” James continued, “From a chocolate Easter egg to a fondue waterfall, but it has to be your own memory and most importantly, it has to be edible.”

“Otherwise; we’d be the Great British Fake Off.” Sirius quipped and everyone in the tent collectively groaned, which only seemed to spur Sirius on even more.

“If our bakers are ready, I think we’ll begin. Ready Prongs?”

“Ready Pads.”

“On your marks,”

“Get set,”

“Bake!”

And maybe for the first time starting a challenge, Remus’ hands didn’t shake.

“Wotcha-makin?” Sirius asked, leaning around one side of Remus as James curved around the other.

“Cake.” Remus replied, not looking at either of them as he carefully evened out the batter in his tin before popping it in the oven. He then turned to face the two presenters, giving them exactly thirty seconds of his time for a round of rapid fire questions before he had to rush straight back into his work.

“What are you making?”

“A swing in a tree.”

“What kind of cake are you working with?”

“Mostly chocolate, but I have a few other elements working in.”

“What’s the memory you chose?”

Remus smiled softly. “One of my first real kisses.”

Sirius and James thanked him and left again, allowing him to get back to work. Remus had already filled Sirius in on all the details of his cake, he had even checked that it would be okay to use that idea in the first place. Sirius had just kissed him in response, enthusiastically and at length. The bakers had given all their details to the presenters and the camera crew before, so they could insert a voice-over effect to inform the audience of what was happening as the contestants were even more busy and focused than usual and weren’t giving too many interviews.

Remus had chosen several circular cake pans, in a range of different sizes and was going to stack all the cakes they produced on top of one another to create the tree trunk. The top of the tree was going to be made of a mix of white chocolate melted over Rice Krispies (with a little dash of green food dye thrown in) and moulded to look like the leafy crown of a tree in the summer. The swing would be the hardest to add, made of carefully moulded chocolate, Remus would have to be careful not to make the seat too heavy so that the ‘ropes’ and the actual tree itself would support its weight.

After taking all of his cakes out of the oven and setting them out to cool, and creating the swing set, Remus made the chocolate buttercream icing that would decorate the tree trunk. He carefully layered his cakes, using a knife to cut off the rough edges and make the cake slope gently upwards before slathering on thick layers of icing. Taking out a small, delicate knife, Remus carefully cut lines and patterns into the icing, aiming for it to look like the bark of a tree. Finally satisfied, he began melting the white chocolate to make the tree top.

“Looking good Re!” Lily enthused from behind her, forearms splattered in icing as she decorated her own cake, a letter with a bright red seal. Kingsley was working away too, apparently recreating the cover of the CD he bought the day his daughter was born.

“Celine Dion,” He had told Remus yesterday, chuckling. “I had never listened to her before, I don’t even know why I bought it, I just left the hospital with a need to celebrate and the music shop was the first place I came across. But what do you know? It turns out that my little girl loves it.”

Remus grinned at the memory, sweet even to him and admired Lily’s cake out loud. “It’s the acceptance letter to my college,” She was explaining to the camera. “I got a full scholarship, so it’s pretty special.”

Remus turned his attention to his now-melted chocolate and added the green carefully, not wanting to make it too light or two dark. He had found that five drops got him the colour he was looking for - the pale chocolate requiring that little extra for the colour to darken. He then added the cereal and stirred it in together, folding it in with his spatula.

He gave his hands a thorough wash again as he waited for the mixture to cool just enough that he could mould it, but not so much that it set, and got back to work, spooning the green mix on top of his tree trunk until there was enough for him to start shaping it. He attached the chocolate swing very carefully as soon as he was satisfied and brought it straight to the fridge to set.

And then he was done.

He looked around the tent, thinking surely this couldn’t be it, he must have something more to do, but no, there was nothing left. His cake was made and decorated and now only time could tell what would happen next.

Feeling a tad useless, Remus set about cleaning his station and clicked the kettle, fulfilling his tradition in providing the crew with tea. He had just made his own one when James announced the official ten minute warning. They were nearly done.

Suddenly Remus’ heart was in his chest. He had been impeccably calm until this moment, a fact that had surprised him but he hadn’t questioned as it was much easier to bake when your hands weren’t shaking and your heart wasn’t thundering. But all the adrenaline rushed into him now as he realised that one way or another, he was finished with the Great British Bake Off.

At the ‘two minutes’ call, Remus took his cake out of the fridge and gave it a final look over. He tweaked the carving in the tree trunk and double checked that the swing would hold its place and then Sirius asked everyone to step away from their creations.

Dumbledore and McGonagall re-entered the room. Remus’ pulse matched every step they took.

“Kingsley,” They called, and the man in question carefully walked his cake to the table at the top of the tent. Remus watched as the judges 'oohed' and 'awed', admiring the level of detail, right down to the serial number Kingsley had apparently memorised.

Lily went next, her piping skills on display, demonstrating her lovely cursive handwriting that read her own name and an edited home address, signed and sealed by the headmaster. In their practice bakes, Remus had seen many versions of the cake on display but he had no doubt that this was her best work yet.

Finally it was Remus’ turn, and he walked up to the front carefully, trying to keep his breathing even. He had a mental image of himself falling and his cake going everywhere but he batted it out of his mind. His cake was the tallest by far and god, he could only hope, the best.

Sirius caught his eye as they cut the cake and winked. To anyone else, it would look like a presenter trying to calm the nerves of a contestant, but Remus heard the words that had been whispered to him that morning as the sun rose.

“You’re gonna win this.”

Remus had blushed and batted him away, but Sirius had looked at him earnestly. “No, Re, seriously. They base these things on who does best that week. And you’ve already won the technical. If you go and blow them away today, just like you always do, you’ve got this in the bag.”

Remus blushed and hit his face in a pillow but he linked their legs together.

“Besides,” Sirius teased, rolling on his back and tucking his arms under his head. Cocky. “You’ve already won the best prize.”

Remus had playfully kicked his ankle and Sirius’ resounding laugh still echoed in his ears.

“Ah, Mr Lupin,” Dumbledore began casually as he picked up a knife, perhaps unaware that he held Remus’ future in his hands. “This is rather impressive.”

Remus swallowed as the slices were cut and set onto plates. “Thank you.”

“You have no adventurous flavours for us I see,” McGonagall observed as she picked up her fork.

“No,” Remus confirmed. “Chocolate is my speciality, and well, I wanted to keep it simple.”

That seemed to be all the commentary they wanted as they both nodded with a small smile and took a bite.

“Excellent Mr Lupin.” McGonagall said. And that was it. They were done. The judges thanked them all and retreated to the back room to do whatever it is the judges do and make some decisions. The cast broke into a round of applause and Remus tugged Lily under his arm, Kingsley joining the little hug soon after.

“Can you believe that’s it?” Lily asked them and the two boys just shook their heads.

“No more non-stop baking.” Kingsley sighed. “I don’t know if I’m sad or relieved.”

“Both.” Remus laughed. “Definitely both.”

“Okay you lot,” James interrupted. “We have a little something for you outside.”

They all grinned. As loyal bake-off fans, they all knew what was coming. They walked outside the tent to picnic tables set up and laden with the cakes they made that day, along with all the eliminated contestants of that year and the families of the finalists.

Remus beamed at Tonks before sweeping his mother up into a hug.

“I’m so proud of you!” Hope said to him as she gripped him close. Remus chuckled as he bent to half his size, squeezing her just as tight. “Thanks Mam.”

“Now introduce me to this man of yours.” Hope teased, speaking low even though the microphones were elsewhere and they were surrounded by noise. Remus flushed, but he beckoned Sirius over with a tilt of his chin, so subtle no camera could have caught it. Remus had told his mom about everything and she had been begging for more information, only just stopping short of looking up celebrity gossip, although she did send Remus one or two pictures of Sirius on red carpets with the caption ‘your children would be beautiful’.

Sirius looked more nervous than Remus had ever seen him, holding his hand out to be shaken, but Hope just pulled him into a hug.

“It’s lovely to meet you Mrs Lupin,” Sirius said, looking a little surprised as Hope cupped his face in her hands and gave him a proper look. Remus hid his laugh in his elbow as Hope patted Sirius’ cheek fondly. “You’ve got good taste.” She said to him, tilting her head towards Remus, who blushed.

“The best.” Sirius agreed.

“Remus!” Tonks yelled, tired of being ignored and pulled Remus’ attention elsewhere. “Your cake was brilliant!”

Remus laughed running his fingers through his hair, the pink staining his cheeks permanent it would seem. “Thanks Tonks.”

The bright haired woman just grinned and wrapped an arm around Remus before cheerfully introducing herself to Hope. Sirius excused himself as he had to go with James to chat with the judges and Lily joined them with her parents, Kingsley standing with his family and talking to Fabian about knitting of all things. They sat in the garden, the sun shining bright, a few fluffy white clouds lazing their way across the sky. They chatted about everything and nothing as they munched on an endless amount of cake, Remus just sipping on tea as he hadn’t had the foresight to make anything gluten free. He was distracted, Lily and Kingsley were too and everyone around them knew it, not minding when they drifted in and out of the conversation. As nervous as he was, Remus knew this moment right here was his favourite, living his literal dream, surrounded by friends and family. That even gave him a sense of calm.

Until the presenters and judges emerged from the tent, all wearing welcoming smiles that revealed nothing. They stopped at the table draped in a pristine white cloth and topped with three beautiful flower bouquets and an engraved glass cake stand. There was no big cash prize in the bake-off, and Remus loved that. It made it all the more endearing to him, and it only allowed for the most passionate bakers to enter, the ones who baked for the love of it, not for money.

For once, James and Sirius were quiet, not needing to grab anyone's attention as the focus was already entirely on them. The three remaining bakers lined up before them as they had previously been instructed by the crew, and then the judges began speaking.

“This year, we had the most wonderful collection of bakers,” Dumbledore started, having to pause already as the applause had already commenced. “And our finalists even more so. I do believe this was the most difficult final we’ve had to judge in a long time, isn’t it Minerva?”

“It was,” McGonagall agreed, nodding. “We had a truly fine selection and the most beautiful array of cakes today. But in the end, there can only be one winner.”

Remus was certain everyone in attendance could hear his heartbeat. Lily’s hand was clammy in his own.

“It is with the greatest pleasure that I can announce that this year’s winner of The Great British Bake Off is…”

James and Sirius picked up a bouquet of flowers each, as did Dumbledore, McGonagall presenting the cake stand. Lily squeezed his hand, and Kingsley’s on the other side too he was sure.

“Remus Lupin.”

Remus blinked even as Lily threw herself on him in a bone-crushing hug, the judges approaching him to present him with his prize. Distantly he saw Sirius and James handing flowers to Kingsley and Lily, but he was in a daze. Dumbledore kissed him on the cheeks and McGonagall shook his hand with a knowing wink and suddenly Remus’ arms were heavy with flowers and expertly crafted glass.

Kingsley shook his hand, patting his shoulder in congratulations and James pulled him into a little side hug. Remus beamed at them, the crowd still cheering and clapping behind him as he reached forward and grabbed Sirius’ shirt, pulling him in for a kiss.

The crowd roared behind them and suddenly Remus realised where he was and what he was doing as he pulled away. “Shit, I’m sorry.” He said frantically. “I wasn’t thinking, I fucking shit- Christ- sorry!”

Sirius laughed and wrapped an arm around Remus’ waist. “I’m not. I love you, and I don’t care who knows. Now shut that filthy mouth of yours and kiss me, you absolute wanker.”

So Remus did.

The newspapers the next day had many headlines, but Remus’ personal favourite? ‘BRITISH BAKE OFF - STAR AND BAKER!’

THREE MONTHS LATER

The bakery was loud and busy and completely hectic and Remus loved every single second working there. Not a day went by that he wasn’t teased about his bake-off status and he was working on his degree here in London. Basically his life was everything he ever could have dreamed it would be.

“Remus, there’s someone here for you!” His co-worker, Katie, called from the front of the shop and Remus grinned, not even bothering to take off his apron as he wiped his hands against the fabric, opening the door with his shoulder, thanking Katie for the message even as his eyes scanned the shop floor.

Sirius.

Standing there in his leather jacket, his hands tucked into the pockets, motorcycle resting outside the door. “Hey,” He greeted, with a lazy smile. “You ready?”

“Yeah,” Remus nodded before freezing. “Wait no, I have to ice a few more pastries, they’re our best-seller.”

Sirius rolled his eyes laughing. “Oh,” He said, waving it off. “Let them eat cake.”

FIN.

[chatonne-rousse]

Great Minds (and Kind Hearts) Think Alike

Written as a gift for my sweet friend @sketchy-panda to celebrate a bunch of happy things in her life, as well as just because she's awesome. Inspired by this adorable piece of her art.

During a rooftop discussion about superhero merch while relaxing after patrol, Ladybug and Chat Noir each decide to share their favorite items with their partner. What results is an impromptu gift exchange that just might open the door to a whole lot more.

Read it on Ao3 here.

"My parents put us on the Christmas tree last year, Kitty! I had to see myself in the living room every day."

He bumps her shoulder with his. "And me, apparently."

"Yes, but your ornament was cute!" She flails her arms comically and he tries not to focus too much on the fact that she called his likeness cute. "Mine didn't even look like me."

"Would you have liked it better if it had?"

"That's not what I..." Ladybug scowls, but there's no real heat in her expression or her voice. "It was just weird."

"No, the baby onesie that I saw on an actual baby that said 'Meow, My Lady' was weird," Chat mutters. "I didn't even know any civilians had ever heard me say that."

Ladybug's surprised laughter rings out across the rooftop they're perched on tonight, loud enough to be heard from any nearby open window until she muffles the sound with her hand over her mouth. "And whose fault is that, you tomcat?" she asks through her remaining giggles.

He tries to pout, but her laughter is contagious and his smile breaks through. He chooses to ignore the jab at his vain attempts at flirting. Wooing is difficult business.

"The baby was cute, though. I had to take a picture with him."

"You had to?"

He shrugs. "That's a very small request, Bugaboo. I've encountered way worse. A few pictures? I don't mind."

She stares at him for a long moment, something unreadable in her gaze, before looking back over the horizon. "Have you ever bought any Chat Noir merch? You strike me as the kind of guy to have a bookshelf full of action figures."

He is the kind of guy to have a bookshelf full of action figures, and he definitely does, but he thinks of the drawer in his closet that's full of red and black, reminders of his beloved partner. There are far fewer items in black and green.

"I...have a few things. The action figures of us are really cool, actually. Didn't you always want to be immortalized in plastic as a kid?"

"Can't say I did, Minou." She bumps his shoulder this time. "I'll bet you had your supersuit all planned in your head already, didn't you?"

Not quite, but only because he never imagined himself as a cat-themed superhero. He has no intention of ever divulging the fact that his first real transformation sequence was anything but random. That secret is between him and Plagg, and he's not telling. Plagg probably will, but that's a problem for future Adrien.

She laughs again. "I'll take your silence as a 'yes'."

"I'll have you know, My Lady, that I have a carefully curated display of collectibles that are very valuable. And no, this—" he gestures from his cat ears to his steel toes, "was all spontaneous. Can't help it if I've got cat class and I've got cat style."

Ladybug shoots him a deadpan look that dissolves into giggles once more when he wiggles his eyebrows.

Success. He loves to hear his partner laugh, loves to make to his partner laugh. These are moments he wouldn't trade for the world.

"Well," she finally says after her laugher subsides, "the Chat Noir doll I saw in the market did not have cat style, so I made my own."

"Really?" His voice is soft with wonder.

"Yep! And a Ladybug doll, too." She casts him a sidelong grin. "They're a duo, you know. I couldn't have Chat without his Lady, could I?"

He wills himself not to cry. It takes three blinks and one shaky breath before he can respond. "You made them? Yourself?"

"Sure. It's not hard. All it takes is felt and thread and buttons for eyes. They're simple, but—" she shrugs, "I think they're pretty cute."

"Wow," he breathes. "You really are amazing, Bugaboo. They sound incredible."

His Lady seems to amaze him anew with each revelation she allows. He could count on one hand the things he knows about her, really knows, and those facts are tucked away and treasured. She's a whiz at video games. She babysits. She has a loving family. She listens to Jagged Stone. She loves animals.

"Thank you, Minou," she says softly, as the barest hint of a blush spreads to her cheeks beneath her mask.

His heart beats a little faster. His tongue feels heavier. He falls just a tiny bit more in love with her.

Ladybug fills the silence again. "Better than mass-produced action figures, for sure. More cuddle-able!"

That startles a laugh from him. "Is that a word?"

"It is now." She shrugs, her eyes sparkling with amusement.

"I'm telling you, Bug, those action figures are cool. I can't believe you don't have a set."

"Guess I need to go shopping."

"Yup," he responds with a decisive nod.

When they make eye contact, it sets off another giggle fit, Ladybug's shoulders shaking with mirth and Chat having to wipe the tears from his eyes. It's not even that funny, but it doesn't have to be.

Paris is quiet tonight, and his heart is light as he relaxes against the rooftop and laughs with his best friend.

*****

Four days later, when they meet up for patrol again, Chat Noir is surprised when his partner joins him carrying a gift-wrapped box. Especially since he himself is hiding a gift bag behind his back.

He sweeps into a bow as she approaches, straightening with an exaggerated wink. "Something for me-ow?"

Her expression morphs into one of longsuffering annoyance. "Well, it was, but I'm reconsidering."

"You wouldn't!" He gasps, one hand clutching his chest over his heart.

Her lips twitch into the beginning of a smile and soon the stillness of the nighttime rooftop is broken by their shared laughter again.

"For you, Chaton," she finally says with a grin, holding out the box.

He produces the gift bag from behind his back and presents it to her, the tissue paper fluttering in the night air. Her eyes widen with delight, and his heart sings.

The handoff is a quiet affair, a hushed silence of surprise settling over the moment as they sit cross-legged, facing each other.

Even the box is beautiful, he notes, wrapped in shiny black paper and adorned by a giant bow of vivid green with black paw prints. He knows, of course, what's in the bag she's holding in her hands. Could this box contain...? He doesn't dare to dream.

He looks up and nods at the bag. "Go ahead, Bug."

The tissue paper rustles as she removes it, trapping it under her foot to keep it from drifting away on the breeze. She takes one look inside, sees the label on the top of the box within, and bursts into laughter. "You didn't!"

Chat grins. "I did."

She pulls out the box to take a closer look. There are several options when it comes to Ladybug and Chat Noir collectible figurines, but this one is his particular favorite. They're sold separately, but he's always been partial to the 1st Anniversary Special Partners Edition, boxed together as a pair and made to wield his baton in his left hand and her yo-yo in her right, leaving them free to hold hands in the middle. Which the figurines' hands are molded to do, and how they're currently posed in the box. They can also stand alone, but there's just something special about the fact that joined hands are an option.

"Okay, Kitty, you were right. They really are cool." She points at the Ladybug figure. "This looks so much better than that Christmas ornament!" Squinting at the box to examine his figurine, she suddenly snorts a laugh. "Your hair looks like a bunch of bananas!"

"Hey!" He pouts, but he knows she's right. When he bought his own set last year, Plagg had made the same observation and laughed so hard he nearly choked on his cheese. He then proceeded to call him Bananoir for days, until Adrien threatened him with a month of Velveeta. The ribbing didn't really bother him that much - honestly, he had to concede the resemblance - because it was an action figure...of himself. No matter how many were produced, that fact would never not be incredible, and no amount of banana hair or cat god snark could diminish his excitement.

"Oh, Chaton, I'm just teasing. I love them." She beams at him, cradling the box with both hands. "Thank you so much."

"You're welcome, LB. I just...I thought it would be fun."

"Great minds think alike, it seems. Your turn!"

He glances down at the box in his lap and back at his partner. Her smile is bright, but her eyes betray a nervous anticipation.

"Bug, you know I'm going to love whatever this is, right?"

"I hope so. I made them myself."

His heart in his throat, he carefully slips the ribbon from the box and slices the paper with his claws. He can barely breathe as he lifts the lid.

His hunch (his dream) is confirmed when he finally sees the contents of the box. Nestled in a bed of tissue paper, side by side, are two handmade plush dolls, opposite in configuration to the action figures but with their soft little hands touching in the center just the same. Tears spring to his eyes unbidden, and he wipes them away quickly, partially out of embarrassment but mostly because he wants to see every detail with clarity.

The seams are pristine, the limbs symmetrical; the dolls are simple, but crafted with a skilled, sure hand. He picks up the Ladybug doll first, lifting it reverently from the box. Red felt with carefully-painted black spots form the doll's body, and her little black button eyes gaze up at him from a matching spotted mask. A sweet smile is the only other adornment on her face, but the doll is perfect without anything else. This is his beloved partner, created by his beloved partner herself. That alone is perfection to him.

He returns the Ladybug doll to the box and shifts his attention to his own likeness, resolutely ignoring the lump in his throat.

Equal in craftsmanship, the felt Chat Noir in his hands smiles the same sweet smile and looks at him with shiny button eyes from a black domino mask. Perched on his blond felt hair are two black cat ears, and a real bell is sewn at his neck. He gives the doll a gentle shake and the golden bell rings with a jaunty jingle. It's adorable.

Chat Noir is helpless to the grin that lights his face, looking up from the doll to his partner just in time to see that same joy reflected back in her own dawning smile. Warmth suffuses his chest, elation and love and an overwhelming gratefulness bursting firework-bright and making his breath catch.

He has never received such a heartfelt gift in his life. This eclipses the fine blue cashmere scarf his father gave him on his fourteenth birthday, folded in his closet and placed where he can see it every day. It's a treasure to him, and it always will be. But this, handmade just for him with obvious care by the person he loves most in the world? Nothing could come close.

"I don't know what to say, LB," he begins once he can finally speak, "They're...they're amazing. Adorable. Perfect." He takes a deep breath. "I'm fumbling this, but...thank you isn't enough."

Ladybug reaches out to place her hand on his knee. Even through two supersuits, the contact sends a shiver up his spine. Her expression is one of warm relief, clearly pleased with his reaction. "Thank you is more than enough, Kitty. It was nothing."

"Nothing?" he splutters. "These are far from nothing!"

"Oh, Minou," she laughs. "I meant that it was my pleasure. It wasn't difficult, but even if it was, you're worth it."

Do. Not. Cry. He thinks. He's been fighting tears since she handed him the box. Once he gets home, he's absolutely going to give in and sob while clutching them to his chest. He's man enough to admit that...to himself.

He takes several deep breaths and swallows against the lump in his throat as he arranges the dolls back in their tissue paper nest, making sure their hands are touching before replacing the lid on the box.

"Thank you, Ladybug," he says softly. "I love them. Us."

She pats the box still held on her lap. "And I love this version of us, too. Thank you for making sure I have the coolest action figures in Paris." After placing the box and the tissue paper back inside the gift bag, Ladybug stands and offers her hand to Chat to help him up. "Now, let's go stow these treasures and patrol. Last one to Sacre-Cœur has to buy the other an ice cream cone."

Still clutching the gift box under one arm, he watches her throw out her yo-yo to snag a distant chimney before she zips off with a giggle. He grins, shakes his head, and reaches behind him for his baton.

"That's my bug," he murmurs to himself, before setting off for home to secure the gift safely.

In a few minutes he'll rejoin his partner in a merry chase across the rooftops. He hopes the night remains quiet.

Chat Noir can't wait to buy ice cream for his Lady.

[myfeetkeepdancing]

Graduation Beach Party   |  Peter Parker x Male!Reader

Request: So in this plot the Midtown Seniors Graduates (a.k.a Peter, Male!Reader, Ned, MJ, Betty, Flash, Teachers maybe, etc.) are having a Graduation Beach party to Huwaii organized by the Midtown school. It's kinda like the movie Spiderman: Far From Home, but different. I think I saw a post about Peter being insecure about his weird rip body but reader find it hot. So basically Peter is to scared/shy to show off his body with his shorts swim suit when he's going to swim with people around, even more scared/shy when his crush reader is going to see him like this. I mean, everyone will be shocked to see Peter that has a rip body even reader but found it attractive. @coledrawsstuff​

Words: 3301

A/N: I wasn’t sure how graduation parties went, so this is my take on it 😉

Peter dreaded this day would come. In more than one way. He wished he'd protested to the idea of going to Hawaii. Hawaii wasn't bad. Not in the slightest. But the plans that were going around scared him in the simplest ways. And the moment he feared most was just around the corner. Laying flat out on his bed, eyes plastered to the ceiling, thoughts far beyond the room. Within a few hours, the final party would be taking place right outside the hotel. From his room, he could hear staff preparing. Bringing out the barbeque, drinks, and all that was needed.

"Dude." Ned said while pulling Peter's fingers from his lips. "Don't bite your fingernails."

"Sorry… I' m-..." Shaking his head, followed by a long sigh, Peter raised himself onto the edge of the bed. Catching the last few rays of sunshine over the balcony as the sun began to set on the horizon. "I don't know. I'm not much of a party guy. Maybe I-"

"No, Peter!" Ned said, cutting him off mid-sentence. "Don't you think about it! This is the greatest day of our lives. I mean, look at this place. Look at those beautiful dancers out there." He said while staring down onto the beach, watching the scarcely dressed staff girls carrying torches and flower necklaces. "Go...Go… change…" Ned mumbled, trying to reach for Peter behind him, while being completely captivated by the girls. "-and get ready for the party."

 "Do you think…"

 "Sorry!" He exclaimed. "See you in a bit, Peter." Ned darted for the door past all the luggage on the floor. "That cute girl just winked at me. I'm so going to ask her to dance with me."

Peter listened to the door close softly into the lock as his mind wandered away. Peter found himself lost in his own thoughts again. Worrying about things no other kid of his age ever thought about. Every since becoming Spider-Man, his body had changed. At that age, everyone does. But Peter changed more than average. He grew stronger, and gained an additional mass of muscles. All he could think about was how he could explain it. Yet, he couldn't. His excuses always revolved around this internship and playtime with Ned and you. He'd never even set foot in a gym. Let alone exercise. Flash was bound so something. And he always timed such remarks in front of the group.

Peter felt incredibly insecure about all of it. The way he looked. The way he felt. He couldn't explain anything. And that made it worse with not being able to respond well to Flash's taunts and annoying quips. Even thinking about going on that photo shirtless made him cringe.

"Peter?" He whipped around, feeling caught as he heard you knocking on the door. "Ned said you were here."

"I ehm… yes...." Rubbing the crook of his neck. Panic hitting him as he sat there. Running over to open the door to you. Peter felt his heart skip more than one beat. Seeing you standing there. No shirt, just swimming shorts and slippers. Peter had a crush on you for a long time and found himself struggling. Day in, day out. Finding the last few months even harder than it already was.

"You ok?" You asked, following Peter into the room. "You seem... on edge?"

"Did Ned say anything?!" He quipped as he turned around. "Did he?"

"No-no, you're just sweating all over." Pointing to the glistening on his forehead. "Let's jump into the sea before the picture. Still have plenty time."

"I forgot my swimming shorts." He said. "I... c-can't..."

"Oh, well I got a spare one."

"W-W...What? You bring a s-spare?" He stuttered, cheeks turning red as he began to feel the nerves in his system go in overdrive.

"Yeah, I'll get 'em. I'll be right back."

Peter had just dug his own grave even deeper now. He was trembling all over at the thought of wearing his crush swimming shorts. Hastily walking back and forth, hands in his hair. This time he couldn't think of a lie or a bad excuse.

"Here, it may be a little bit too big. But if you tie up the strings, you'll be fine." Peter sat at the edge of his bed, looking at the colorful shorts, sighing deeply.

"(Y/N)..." He said in a low voice. "I'm not… I… I don't feel comfortable about it."

"Don't worry." You chuckled. "I washed it before packing."

"That's not it." He jumped to his feet, walking back and forth with a hand combing through his curls. "I… d-" Shaking his head without finishing his sentence.

"What's wrong…?"

"I don't want this photo to happen. I don't want any of it!" He yelled out angrily in a waterfall of words. "I hate it! The whole thing. And-"

"Peter!" With both hands, you grab his shoulders. "Calm down! What's going on? Did something happen?" His big puppy eyes stared in yours for a moment before rolling his head down.

"I… can't say." Pulling himself free from your grasp. "You-… Y-You wouldn't understand." Plopping himself on the edge of the bed.

"If you don't say it, I certainly won't." You crouch onto your knees, hoping to level yourself with him, catch a glimpse of his eyes. "Please let me, Peter. We'll keep it between us, if you like."

Peter felt the butterflies buzzing in his stomach. How he loved you. Sitting in front of you. Everything he ever wanted, so close. He wanted to tell, but not risk it. Yet, and the end of all this, there was a good chance they wouldn't see each other again. The thought of it alone brought him to the verge of tears. For so many years, Peter had found a friend in you; and more. The things he had in common, the laughter, the jokes, the science. Even the simplest things. Through the years, he had grown fond of you. And in his eyes, the biggest mistake of all, a growing passion for you. To such an extent, he didn't want to sleep in the same room in the hotel. Be near you for too long.

"I need you to be honest (Y/N)." He looked up at you, the red circling his eyes. "Promise me."

"Peter… I…" Your heart skipped a beat seeing his eyes watering like that. "Of course. I will. I promise." You said resolutely. "Always."

"I-I… I... don't feel comfortable... going without... a shirt on." He mumbled. Even as he said the words, he felt embarrassed. "It's… It's... difficult to understand. And everyone's out there. And… And… y-you a-are..." Peter buried his face into his hands, overcome by shame and worries.

With Peter, you always had to choose your words carefully. He wasn't quick to anger, but he is smart. And to convince Peter to do something, you either had to have a well-thought-through plan. Or trick him. You couldn't win an argument with him. "What is bothering you? Is it a scar?"

"N-No… It's different..." He sighed. Hunching together more and more. You sat in silence, wondering what troubled him. "I shouldn't look like this (Y/N)! Not on my age." He suddenly veered up from the bed. Aggravated and annoyed by his thoughts. "See!?" Lifting the hem of his shirt, revealing abs. You were taken by surprise how well built Peter was for his age. The abs were nicely sculpted and well developed. "Everyone's going to talk about it (Y/N)!" His eyes welled with tears, on the verge of spilling across his cheeks. "I… I can't do it."

You raise yourself back up again and approach Peter. Standing there, sobbing on his own. "Listen to me, Peter." Placing his forehead against your chest, you let your fingers rake through his brown curls. "Hey…" You whisper softly, trying to get his attention. But even in this situation, Peter tried to avoid your gaze. Placing your hands on his cheeks, you gently lift his head upwards. Up close, Peter was really something. Your heart fluttered, as you couldn't help but smile. Not because of his misery. But he looked so cute. Even now. "Peter, listen…" You said softly. His big eyes finally connecting with yours. They were puppy-like. So precious and impossible to not feel his emotions spilling over to you. With the pads of both thumbs, you gently wipe away the tears from his eyes. "Look at me." Finally, able to catch his full attention. "You do... look good, Peter." You said. "You always have."

"Y-You only say that because… I… wanted to h-"

"No-No-No…" You cut him short. "I said that… because I mean it. Now, go change into these shorts. And then let's have a look." Handing him several flower necklaces in various colors and lengths. You pull them back before Peter grabs them. "But only if you want to."

"I don't see the point…" Shaking his head, disappointed. "B-But…Give me a minute." He said, disappearing into the bathroom. The time Peter spent in the bathroom was enough to feel flustered by his image. If the last months weren't already challenging enough. The point where you couldn't stop thinking about was already crossed. Peter looked so good… Both outside, and inside. And that thought kept repeating in your mind over and over again. You had to tell him.

"(Y/N)" Peter calls again. Waking you from your thoughts. Hearing the door unlock. "Can you come look?"

With a mission in mind, you lift yourself from the bed. Feeling the nerves in your legs. You were shaking. And quite heavily so. You take a few deep breaths before you walk into the bathroom and see Peter standing in front of the mirror. Peter's gaze was elsewhere but looking at himself via the mirror. Too shy or scared to do so. Peter looked nervous, and you too felt like it. The moment you stepped in, there wasn't a glimpse shared between the two of you. So you slowly approach, and take a stand behind him.

With a slight shudder in your breathing, you try to focus. Keeping your eyes on the necklaces, with good intention. Peter had simply thrown every size and shape on. But you couldn't help but stare, if only stealing a few glances in-between. His pecs and abs. His shoulders. He looked stunning. His hand grabbed yours, out of the blue, when you tried to remove a necklace. A moment of tension that forced eye contact. It's that glance you give to each other, knowing how close you finally were. You could feel him shaking through and through. Hands warm and sweaty. "Wait." He spurted, slowly letting your hand slip from his fingers, and leaned towards the door, turning the little knob. "First, what do you think?"

"Ehm… Well, locking the door might not-"

"You said you would be honest." He turned around, watching you with big eyes. "Please (Y/N)..."

Your heart pounded in your chest. Blood boiling, but in the right way. It's there you realized you had never seen him without a shirt longer than maybe half a second. In the changing rooms, he'd always take the corner. Change within a heartbeat and disappear. "L-Let's remove some of these…" Removing the necklaces one by one. It felt tense. The way you incidentally brushed your hands against his skin.

Peter looked fantastic. Again those broad shoulders. His chest was big. So well rounded. So full. And that sixpack. Your throat was going dry the more you looked. "You… eh…" A shuddered breath left you, as you wanted to think of something to say. But you couldn't. Captivated by his eyes. That innocence. That sweetness. All the things you were going to say, washed away by his cuteness.

"(Y/N)... ?" Peter asked, feeling his blood pounding between his ears. He was as nervous as ever before. Being this close to his friend. His crush. He could hear his irregular breathing. See the blush on his cheeks. And most importantly, Peter sensed it. Your heartbeat. It began to race the moment they had the discussion earlier. Peter could feel his rapid heartbeat when he laid his head to rest on your chest. But now, it was the only thing he could focus on, as it went crazy. Crazy for him. He knew.

"H-How do… do y-you feel?" You asked with a slight unintentional tremble in your voice. "That's... the most important."

"Say it, (Y/N)" Taking a step closer. "Just be honest with me." His eyes looked red, almost as if on the verge of tears. But it wasn't without a smile, a growing one. "P-Please..."

"I don't know… how to say it… Peter." You mumble, holding both his shoulders and averting your gaze for a moment. Swallowing the lump in your throat. This could be it. After all this time. "But… if this... might be the only last chance… like this… the two of us… then-"

"Who says that?" Peter cut you off. "We still have the ceremonies and-..."

"And then we part-…" Your voice broke as you said the words. The thoughts alone had wrecked you for months. And the nerves had taken their toll. "-we part ways, Peter." Feeling the tears shimmer in your eyes. The fear showed in Peter's eyes. He knew what you were talking about. And he clearly felt the same. "I… I don't want that." You whispered to him. "I… don't…"

"A-Are y-y-you sa-.. s-saying that…"

"I've always liked you, Peter." The heat rushed through your systems. Felt weak in the knees, as you instinctively pulled Peter closer to you. Inches away from his lips. "More than anything. And today hasn't changed a thing. If only… it made it worse. Peter… y-you… make me-"

"I've had a crush on you for so long…" He outright confessed. "-t-t-that I can't think straight when you're around (Y/N)."

"I want you… to know… that… that… I love you, Peter." You stammered. "I love you." Breathing heavily, staring into his puppy eyes. With your trembling hands, you lift a necklace from his chest, and over his head, taking the last step in his direction. Peter pinned between the sink and you. Your noses almost bumping into each other, as you both showed a growing smile. It's a silent exchange of glances. But you both knew what needed to happen. You lean into him, gently landing your lips on Peter's. They're so soft and warm. Inviting to a degree, you've never felt. Your heart fluttered. And for that brief moment, in that kiss, the world fell away around you. Holding his body, leaning into you, meeting Peter's loving eyes up close.

"Peter…" You kissed him again. "You are absolutely beautiful." He was so flustered to a point Peter couldn't say anything. Only staring into your eyes. "With and without clothes." Returning the kiss to you before cradling his head in the crook of your neck. "Inside and outside." Kissing his hair. "Don't you forget that."

"Thank you (Y/N)." He quietly whispered, peppering small kisses to the skin of your neck. His arms holding you in his embrace. It's intimate at first, as the barrier finally had fallen. But as you stand there, together, it felt more than that. Reassuring and calming. Swaying in each other's arms, peppering small kisses onto each other. "I'm so happy…" He said, looking at you with red lines eyes. Rubbing the first tears from his eyes with the back of his hand. "I… I… love you (Y/N)." He smiled broadly. "I w-wanted to tell you... B-But… I never knew how to." Hugging himself tightly against you.

"Nor did I, Peter." You admitted. "It kept me awake for so long. The thought of leaving-…" Shaking the thoughts from your head, you tighten your arms around Peter. "Not anymore."

"I love you so much (Y/N)." He smiled. "C-Can… I… kiss you… again?" He stuttered but held back for a moment. "Oh, man... I'm still shaking all over." Looking at his trembling hands. "You make me so nervous… I… I…"

"Please, Peter…" You silenced his lips with your finger. "Kiss me until the nerves go away. And then… keep going." Peter's eyes sparkled as he cupped your cheeks. Taking your lips on his again. This time with confidence and power.

 - - -

 "And… that's how it happened." Peter beamed from ear to ear. Waiting for May's reaction as she held the picture in her hands. It showed the group picture on the beach in Hawaii. With the sun going down in the background, and everyone dressed in the right style. In the corner, top left, back row, stood Peter, together with you. Both their arms around each other. And as the photographer looked for the right moment, Peter had focused his spidey-senses. And leaned in. Kissing you on the cheek, just at the right moment, immortalizing the day forever. Peter had never felt so proud as in that moment.

"Peter! I'm so happy for you." May said. "I love it. It's perfect." And even before Peter realized halfway continuing his story about how funny and loving you are, she had driven her scissors deep into it.

"May!" Peter called, jumping up and over the couch, scaring her in the process. "What're you doing?!"

"Calm down, sweetie." She said with complete calm in her voice, patting Peter on his cheek. And continued to cut further into the picture. "I'm getting rid... of all these people… I don't care about. See?" With great care, she cut a frame around you and Peter.

"But… But… you love these pictures?"

"I do. And this is the best one." She reassured him. "I need these two close to me." Holding the small squared picture of Peter and (Y/N). "You two are the cutest." She smiled, pulling Peter in for a hug. Followed by a kiss on top of his hair. "I love it."

"You haven't met him yet…" Peter said as if she was overestimating you. "He could be-" As he was disturbed by a notification on his phone.

"No, Peter." May continued while he read your message. "He's cute. I can see it. You did good." Ruffling through his hair. "I haven't seen you this happy before." She chuckled as she tried to get Peter's attention again.

Peter felt amazing. He couldn't keep his eyes away from the picture. It held so many good memories for him. Thinking about you made him glow and seeing you in the picture even more. He felt the butterflies stirring his insides again. A blush warming his cheeks. Peter was absolutely crazy about you. "Yeah… He's great." He smiled, biting his lower lip. "But May... he wants to meet up. What do I do?"

"What do you want?"

"Well, I… I... want to be with him, of course… and…" Peter said with a slightly shaken voice. The smile on his face growing as he thought about you. "-and… you know…"

"Of course you want to." May said with a smile, knowing exactly what her little boy meant. "Now, Petey, send him a message back. Let him come over tonight." Pulling Peter's eyes up from the phone as she pulled the boy's face up by his chin.

"But how-?" Peter panicked slightly. "How do I look? How should I look? What if-"

"First Peter." May interrupted, trying to stop him from rambling. "First, you're going tell me all about him." Peter's eyes sparkled as he thought about you. And how you could spend the night together. He wanted nothing more. But how he should approach it, that was another thing. He never dated before. And in a way, he felt like it was a date. May led Peter back to the couch. "Then we're going to come up with something special for tonight. Just for the two of you."

[serendipityjxmn]

Chapter 11

TW: None

Words Count: 2.6k

Link to Masterlist

Link to Chapter 12

You think one day of rest was enough since you can walk perfectly well now without wincing. So you wake earlier than Jimin the next day, marvelling at his features for a few moments but also fighting the urge to punch him out of giving you sleeping pills so you could oversleep and not come to work.

But now that you’ve reached the office, you feel nervous. You don’t know how to face Minhyuk. You don’t know if you could even face him.

Luckily, you don’t see him at all throughout the morning. During lunch however, when you return to the office, you see him first before he does yet he just brushes right pass you. You feel relieved yet you can’t shake off the strange feeling.

And your hunch turns out to be right when Minhyuk starts being mean from the next encounter and forward. He gets angry at you for the smallest of reasons. He doesn’t quite look at you when he gives order and when you ask him to clarify things, sometimes he would glare at you. It also doesn’t help that as you get more nervous you tend to make more mistakes.

Work feels even more exhausting when you’re mentally stressed at workplace. You come home with a headache that one night.

As soon as you prepared Jimin’s dinner, you hunt for some medicines and brings it with you as you head towards the room at the end of the hallway which you’ve somehow turned into your small office area (and your husband doesn’t seem to mind so-). You sit yourself on the sofa and shifts through the documents. The expenses report from several departments submitted during today’s meeting aren’t due for review until Friday yet Minhyuk says he wants to see it first thing next morning. You know he’s just doing it to get back at you and he’d probably ended up stacking the files on his table untouched just like the last task which means you’re doing this for naught anyway but you don’t want to give him any chance of finding your fault so here you are.

Your head feels like spinning so you quickly gulp down the medicine and force yourself to start on your work. Half an hour into it though, you don’t realize when you had fallen asleep.

You wake up next day in your own bed, perfectly tucked in while Jimin sleeps soundly next to you. You sit up almost immediately.

You look at the sleeping figure next to you, his snores are very light, you note.

Unknowingly, you inch closer to his side. You’ve always loved his smell. He just smells like... him.

You’re pretty sure he tucked you in last night. Why does he pretend to be so harsh all the time if he actually cares for you?

Maybe it isn’t impossible to build a civil relationship with him. With your husband.

You stare at his features. You can’t deny it. Jimin’s really good looking. And this good looking man is your husband. Sometimes you still have trouble believing.

Your eyes fall to his lips. His plump pink lips looks very tempting. You briefly wonder if-

Don’t.

Don’t fall for him.

And at that exact moment, Jimin’s eyes shot open while simultaneously his hand grips your right hand that hovers over his face seconds ago tightly. You freeze completely, not moving a muscle because you know he’s doing it out of reflex and you don’t want to dwell on how he’s trained for that.

His stare at you is murderous and your hand move to retreat but he kept his grip vice like on your wrist.

And you could feel the intensity slowly rising between the both of you.

You could’ve sworn his face inches closer to you and you panic instantly so you back away and sit up. Without wasting another breath, you get up and disappear into the shower.

You panic at your desk. In light of this morning’s incident, finding yourself in your bed instead of the sofa as well the tense moments with Jimin, you weren’t in the right state of mind so you completely forgot about the report Minhyuk asks you to handle yesterday.

You gather your courage to tell Irene first.

“Ah the sales reports?” She says and you nod. “Mr. Park already handed it to me first thing this morning when he arrived. I went to see Mina just now and handed the reports to Mr. Kim as well.”

O...kay. You definitely don’t expect that but you can’t help but sigh in relief. Did Jimin take it last night when he finds you in the small library room?

“Wait. If you brought the files home last night, how does Mr. Park have it?” Irene narrows her eyes at you.

Shoot. “Um- I forgot I didn’t- I mean, I just realized I didn’t bring it home at all. My head was really spinning last night and I thought I brought it home, turns out I didn’t.” You fake a smile. “Perhaps Mr. Park saw it on my table.”

Irene huffed at your answer, perhaps contemplating whether to believe you or not. She doesn’t say anything after that.

You’re at Mina’s table, discussing with her about updates on meetings with R&D team as requested by your husband when Kim Minhyuk appears from his office room, storming at you with a furious look.

“Miss Y/N, what on earth do you think you’re doing?” He shouts at you, making everyone at the office look up and you feel small immediately. “Are you even doing your job?”

“I’m sorry Mr. Kim-“

“This!” He pushes a document towards you and you look down to see the sales report yesterday.

“Is there something wrong-“

“You fucking tell me.” He snarls. “Tell me, how on earth did you organize this? I don’t understand a single thing. Did you even do it?”

You remain silent. Because he’s right. You didn’t do it. But how can you say that? What would you say to him? That your husband, the president, the CEO arranged the report?

“I honestly have no idea if you’re coming for work or you’re just fucking around.” He hisses.

You literally hear the gasps from your office mate.

You draw a breath, trying to calm yourself to face Minhyuk. “I’m sorry, Mr. Kim if you’re not satisfied but-“

“Mr. Park.” Someone says. Your stomach lurch instantly.

Both you and Minhyuk look up. Your lung drops when you sight your husband standing few metres away, his hands in his pocket.

“Jimin.” Minhyuk addresses your husband.

Jimin’s eyes are on you and you look down immediately. Anxiety starts filling you up. Is he going to shout at you too?

He crosses the distance and stops short before you and Minhyuk.

“Minhyuk.” Jimin nods at him. “Do you mind if I borrow.. my wife for a moment?”

Everyone in the room gasps including you.

You stare up at him, eyes wide in shock. He wasn’t looking at you, he was smiling at Minhyuk although you know it’s entirely a facade.

You eyes flicker to Minhyuk. His expression is priceless. You’ve never seen him in a state more shock, what with all his constant smirk or flirty expression.

“Y-your wife?” He stutters.

Jimin steps closer to you then place his hand around your waist, pulling you flush against him that earns another gasp around the room. “My wife,” he reconfirms. Then towards you, he smiles briefly before he pulls you with him and leaves you at your desk before you could say anything as he walks back towards his office.

You’ve no idea what to say.

Everyone knows you’re his wife now.

And you’ve never felt so guilty towards Jimin.

Irene had never been this loud before, you think.

“Like what on earth- I really wouldn’t know! Like you know, with the way he’s treating you or literally everyone with his cold personality. Oh well, I guess that explains his stares at you.”

You stare at her. “He.. stares.. at me?”

“He does! Quite a lot actually. Caught him on a few occasions. You probably won’t notice them but I have eyes of a hawk.” She winks at you.

“You’re sure he’s not doing it to everyone?”

“Hmm he kind of does actually.. But with you- I don’t know. The look is softer, I think.” Irene says fondly.

You shake your head. “You’re exaggerating.”

“No, I’m not.” She sigh. “Why didn’t you tell me? Or anyone for that matter.”

You give her a small smile. “We wanted to keep it private. Don’t really wanna mix work.”

She nods at this. Then suddenly, her eyes widen at you then clasps your hand tightly. “Oh God! You really really have to forgive me.”

You frown. “You did something wrong?”

“Remember when you asked me about Clara Kim? Oh God- and I freaking told you she’s his girlfriend oh Lord- I’ve commited a huge sin, I know- and I’m so so sorry-“

You burst out laughing. She looks puzzled at first but then joins you. Then she turns serious. “But were you for real? You really don’t know who Clara Kim is?”

You bit your lips, unsure how to answer her. Then you slowly nod. “I don’t know.”

She looks at you in sympathy then leans down to whisper, “You think he’s cheating?”

You know he does. “No, I don’t think so. If he is, why would he let his wife be his secretary where she practically knows all his schedule?”

“Hmph. Makes sense, I guess.” She straightens herself then. “Okay. I’m going out to lunch. You coming?”

At that same moment, Jimin comes out. His eyes find you immediately. “Had your lunch?”

“I’m about to head out with Irene.”

“No- no Mr. Park. I forgot I actually had plans with my boyfriend. She’s all yours.” Irene says, already picking up her stuffs and standing.

You know she just made that up so you try as hard to give her the eye that you don’t wanna go for lunch with your husband now but she dashes off super quickly, leaving you with your husband.

“Come on.” He says.

You stand rooted to your spot, not budging. Jimin turns back to look at you. “I’m- I’m gonna have lunch with Mina.”

He glares at you and you almost want to cower but still holds your decision.

“Fine then.” He grunts then walks away. You heave a sigh of relief.

You don’t actually plan to have lunch with Mina. In fact, you don’t feel like going out at all. Instead, you sink back onto your chair. Your iPad in front of you flashes and you grab it instantly.

You feel your blood runs cold immediately upon seeing it.

You’re all over the news.

[REVEALED] Seoul’s most successful young CEO, Park Jimin’s wife identity revealed.

Mid this year, a large population of young women in South Korea had their hearts broken when arguably, Seoul’s most eligible bachelor, a young and good looking, successful CEO of the largest tech company, Park Jimin announced that he would be tying the knot with non-public figure woman, who’s identity remains closely kept secret.

But we finally know now who’s the girl that has stolen the heart of the heir to Parks Corporations. The woman is revealed to be __, 23 years old, currently working as secretary at Park Jimin’s own company, Bangtan Inc. It seems like the President wants to keep the wife close- much to the single ladies who’s working in the company’s heartbreak. The background of Park Jimin’s wife is yet to be known but whoever she may be, she must be reading a helluva of a prenup. Bagging South Korea’s allegedly most eligible bachelor, perhaps we can arrange a session to ask for a tip or two?

You wish the ground could swallow you whole.

Isn’t it illegal to be exposing informations of non public figure like this? Though you suppose the writer is trash anyway when he exposed your identity while clearly stating you’re a non public figure in the same line.

Wasn’t your marriage to Jimin suposed to be a secret and your identity kept hidden?

Yeah but then you yourself went to work at his company, gets harrassed that drive to the point of Jimin having to expose your relationship.

God. Both your index finger pressed each side of your temple tightly.

You’re contemplating whether you’re supposed to go back with Jimin so you decided to just go with him if he comes out of the office around the same time you’re off work but if he doesn’t then you’ll head home first and you desperately pray for the latter.

However, all hopes went down the drain when Jimin appears out of his room and only glares at you for a few seconds before you scramble to your feet and hastily packs your stuff.

And that’s how you find yourself walking timidly, very self conscious behind him as everyone stares at the two of you and you think it couldn’t get anymore embarassing at this.

Jimin is silent during the car ride. He busied himself with his iPad, leaving you fidgeting in the heavy silence. You decided to just man up and address the elephant in the room.

“J-Jimin..” you call softly. “I’m sorry it came down to this.. and now everyone knows you’re- I’m- um.. we’re-“

“Married.” He cuts you off.

You look up at him. He doesn’t look at you, his eyes still on his tab.

“We’re married.” He repeats. “Is that so hard to say?” He asks, finally looking at you.

“No- I me-“

“Nevermind.” He turns his gaze back to his tab and the conversation is over.

You don’t mean it that way but you just don’t want people looking down at him for marrying you, someone of no status and not even a decent upbringing background.

You play with the spoon on your hand, guilt still swallowing you whole. Drawing a breath, you look up at Jimin who’s drinking his glass of water. You’re both on the dining table, only sounds of cutleries can be heard.

“Jimin, I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean for all this to get exposed. I’m sorry.” You say softly.

His expression turns cold. “Are you?” He asks, looking straight at you with piercing eyes, making you recoil.

“What do you mean? I didn’t want this to happen either-“

“Yeah none of this would’ve happened if you just sit your ass at home, playing house or the perfect fucking wife.” He sneers. “Instead, you just have to work in my own fucking company, get yourself harrassed and left me with no choice.”

You want to answer him, that he’s being unfair because you didn’t ask to be harrassed but Jimin was raging so you stay muted.

“It’s dangerous, do you know that? Now everyone knows who my wife is and it’s fucking dangerous-“

“Why?” You cut him. “Tell me why it’s dangerous- Jimin who are you-“

He raises from his seat and leans down to you, face merely inches away and you swallow. “I’m a dangerous person darling.. I can snap your neck in two and you won’t see it coming.” He says as his fingers touch your neck, in an act that seems as if it’s caressing it but you know better. “And now that everyone knows who you are.. that means they can come and snap your neck too baby. But of course, you wouldn’t see it coming. And that’s what happens when you don’t listen to me. Not when I tell you to quit your fucking job, not ever.”

He raises again, standing upright before turning on his wheels and leaves you. You struggle to calm your erratic breath and nerves. And finally, you let the tears flow.

That night too, you wrote the resignation letter.

Link to Chapter 12

Posted on 210423 9:00PM

[eliemo]

See Yourself Through My Eyes

Summary: Virgil severely misunderstands Roman’s intentions. They both have a lot to work on...but they’re helping each other.

Notes: Yes I’m writing prinxiety immediately after that episode. Enjoy some gays. 

Virgil was pretty sure there wasn’t a single person in the world who didn’t know about his feelings for Roman. 

Logan definitely knew, because Logan somehow knew everything, and Patton was less than subtle about his support or dreaded pity whenever Roman would inevitably brush Virgil off or call him a name during a video. 

There was no way Thomas didn’t at least suspect something. Virgil was a part of him, after all, and he was much more attuned with the aspects of his personality than he gave himself credit for. 

That meant, of course, that Roman also knew. 

Honestly, Roman probably knew before Virgil did. He was the romantic side, always looking for signs of love and affection and passion. Well, looking for it anywhere other than Virgil. Obviously.  

And that was fine. Virgil had learned to accept it a long time ago that his feelings were just...common knowledge that would never be acted upon. 

The fact that Roman knew made him anxious sometimes, and earlier on it had certainly kept him awake at night, but he had to admit there was some relief in that knowledge. 

Roman knew that Virgil was helplessly head over heels for the Prince, and had never once acted any awkward or disgusted around him. They were friends now, the two of them making an effort to get to know each other after Virgil revealed his name, and that was fine with him. Friendship was more than Virgil had ever dared to hope for. 

It hurt a little, sure. Even if it had never been brought up, it was still rejection all the same. And the eyebrow raises from Logan and sympathetic frowns from Patton didn’t help matters either. 

But he’d get over himself. He still loved what he had, the Prince’s company and smiles and squeezes to his hand after a long day. 

It was more than enough. 

Now though...now Virgil was trying to ignore the fact that something was wrong. 

He knew the others well enough by now to pick up on when they were acting differently, doubled by the fact that he was Anxiety- it was quite literally his job to look out for any little signs that he’d done something wrong or someone was upset. 

Roman was working on something new. Virgil knew that glint in his eye, the spark of an idea forming, the air of excitement he carried with him. But it was a bit different this time. He hadn’t mentioned anything outright and he seemed almost...uneasy about whatever it was. 

Logan and Patton were obviously in on it. Patton did an awful lot of giggling which earned a stern look and an eye roll from Logan, and more than once the three of them had abruptly stopped their conversation when Virgil had walked into the room. 

So needless to say, by the time things came to a head, Virgil was already a jumpy, anxious mess waiting for the shoe to drop, for someone to just hurry up and chew him out for doing something wrong. 

He’d really thought he’d been doing well. He’d been trying to at least. Thomas was ahead of schedule, and Virgil had been careful to let him unwind and relax when he needed it. 

It was three days into the strange behavior, the sun beginning to set into the paling gray sky when Virgil left his room in search of the others, hoping he was still welcome for a movie night or family meal. 

Roman was sitting on the couch, alone in the living room, fidgeting restlessly and drumming his fingers along his crossed legs. 

When he saw Virgil, the Prince’s eyes practically lit up as he leapt to his feet, and Virgil resolutely ignored the familiar swoop in his stomach. 

“There you are!” Roman exclaimed, quickly adjusting his sash and running his fingers through his hair. “I was going to come up and get you but I- well I didn’t want to bother you if you were busy.” 

Virgil really hoped his blush wasn't as obvious as he thought it was. He shrugged, hands stuffed in his pockets. “I’m, uh, I’m not busy. What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing’s wrong! I just want to talk to you about something!” 

That still very much sounded like something was wrong, and he felt his anxiety rise, squeezing shaky hands into fists, but it was hard to completely dread anything when Roman was looking at him so eagerly. 

“Yeah, ok,” he said. “Go for it.” 

Roman looked...nervous. Virgil halfheartedly thought about telling the Prince he was stealing his brand. 

But Roman was talking before Virgil could work up the courage to tease him. 

“Virgil,” he started. “I...well first of all I wanted to thank you for giving me a second chance. I know we don’t always see eye to eye but...I’ve truly enjoyed being able to call you a friend these last months.”

Virgil blinked, not quite sure what to say, struggling to think around the butterflies in his stomach. “Oh. Uh, yeah. You too.” 

God, he was so useless. 

“I’m glad!” Roman cleared his throat, wringing his hands together before continuing. “But...well, lately I’ve...I’m not even quite sure how to say this to be honest. I mean, it’s my job to be good at this but...you make me nervous, I suppose.” 

Virgil made him nervous?

“Spit it out, Princey,” he said with a small smile, hoping to convey that the longer he stalled, the more nervous they would both inevitably get. If Virgil had hurt him or done something wrong, he needed to know. “Did I...Do something?” 

“What? No! Of course not.” Roman took a breath. “It’s...well, I’ll just come out and say it. I believe I’ve caught feelings for you, Virgil. Romantic feelings, if that...if that wasn’t clear. I- er, thought about a more grand declaration but I...figured you wouldn’t like that.” 

For a second, everything froze, Virgil’s pounding heart stopping in his chest. And then the giddy feeling in his stomach was gone, butterflies replaced with cold dread as the pieces fell together. 

It made sense now. The planning when he was away, the conversations abruptly stopping, the nervous excitement, side glances, and laughter…

Everyone was in on it. Because everyone knew about his feelings, everyone knew it wasn’t mutual and that Virgil had accepted that, so everyone thought it would be ok to toy with his heart a bit. They thought it’d be funny. 

“It’s- it’s totally fine if you don’t feel the same!” Roman said quickly, eyes widening at the lack of a response, and Virgil’s heart only broke further. “Seriously I- I don’t want to make things awkward or ruin our friendship--” 

“No, I do,” Virgil said, because what the hell was the point in denying it? Everyone knew. It just wasn’t...talked about. At least, he’d thought they all had the decency not to talk about it. “You know I have feelings for you, Roman.” 

He stared at the ground, at his socked feet on the carpet, refusing to look up and see the fake excitement Roman had plastered on for the sake of a prank. 

“You do?” he heard the Prince say. “You do! Oh- that’s...that’s good! Right? So...so what are we--” 

“Why are you doing this?” 

Virgil knew he and Roman hadn’t always gotten along, and they still bickered occasionally, but he hadn’t thought...he’d never thought he would be so cruel. 

“I...huh?” 

“Why are you doing this?” Virgil repeated, finally raising his head just to try and catch Roman’s smirk, rewarded only with the other’s confusion. “Did you...what, did you all think this would be funny?” 

“What? No!” Roman sounded incredulous, confusion morphing to something a bit more angry. “Dude, I’m confessing.” 

“Yeah, sure.” Virgil hunched his shoulders, turning away to frantically scan the room. “Where is it? Where’s the camera?” 

“Camera?” the Prince echoed. “Wh- you think this is a prank?” 

“Of course it's a prank!” Virgil hadn’t meant to get worked up, but honestly could they blame him for getting angry? Did they think he was just going to stand here and take his heart getting broken? “I don’t know why you all thought this would be funny. Yeah, I get it, I’m an asshole. Doesn’t mean you guys have to--” 

“You’re not an asshole,” Roman said, and Virgil scoffed, squeezing his eyes shut because he was not going to cry. “Virgil. You’re not. Why...why do you think this is a prank? Why can’t I just...like you?” 

“Because I know you don’t feel the same, ok? I know we never talked about it but it’s pretty fucking obvious. And that’s fine. Or it- it was fine until you decided to treat my feelings like some big joke. What, is it because I’m Anxiety? Am I still just some dark brooding villain who can’t possibly experience real love so why not make a stupid video about it? Is that it?” 

He took a breath, still refusing to open his eyes, willing himself to calm down, to stop talking, and get out of the situation as quickly as he could. 

“Sorry, I’m...I didn’t mean to say all that,” he muttered. “Just...god, please don’t upload this. Please.” 

Somewhere along the way his voice had fallen into nothing more than a pathetic whisper, but right now he really didn’t care. Virgil couldn’t see himself leaving his room for the next couple days at least. 

“I’m not recording this, Virge,” Roman said, and he sounded painfully genuine. “I swear I’m not. We can go somewhere else, if you want me to prove it. I promise there’s no camera.” 

Virgil’s shoulders dropped, and he relented with a shaky sigh. “Alright. So then...is this just for fun? Did I piss you off somehow?” 

“No. God, no Virgil I would never…” he trailed off, pausing for just a few seconds. “I didn’t know you felt the same. I had no idea.” 

That got Virgil to open his eyes, snapping his head up and fully expecting to see a joking smile and bright eyes. Instead, Roman’s expression was sad and genuine, and a bit guilty.

“What?” Virgil asked. “You...Roman, everyone knows. Literally everyone.” 

“Well...I didn’t. Truly.” 

Virgil blinked, momentarily at a loss because this was...there was no way. “You’re the romantic side. How could you...how?” 

Roman shrugged, suddenly averting his gaze. “You didn’t know either. I’ve been taken with you for some time now, Stormcloud.” 

Virgil shook his head, desperately trying to block it out, to push down that rising hope and excitement fighting its way to the surface. 

Because...because no. No. It wasn’t true, it wasn’t. It didn’t make any sense. He wasn’t going to drop his defenses just to be crushed and laughed at. 

“That’s different.” 

“Why?” Roman asked, soft and sincere. “Why’s it different, Virgil?” 

“Because...because it’s you. Obviously I’m going to fall for you, you’re- you’re perfect. You’re...talented and passionate and I’m...I’m me. You’re not going to fall for Anxiety.” 

His words were met with silence, and there was a bit of relief amongst the sorrow in his chest, because if Roman didn’t have anything else to say, it meant this was over. He could just...forget about it and hopefully avoid any future teasing. 

But then Roman took a step closer, Virgil forcing himself not to back up, immediately tensing up and waiting. 

“But I did,” the Prince said. “I did fall for you, Virgil.” 

Virgil shook his head again, looking away as Roman slowly approached, waiting for him to drop the act. “Stop it.” 

“I fell for all of you,” Roman continued. “I fell for your smile, for your laugh- you have the most beautiful laugh, did you know that? I wish I could hear it more, but every time I do I feel as though everything is right in the world.” 

Roman was in front of him now, one hand cupping Virgil’s cheek, and he couldn’t help but lean into the touch despite wanting to curl up into a ball and sob. 

“You represent anxiety,” Roman said. “But you’re so much more. You’re brave, Virgil. I’ve seen it so, so many times. You fight against your fears, against anything that would put us in danger. You protect us. You’re strong, Virge, stronger than you give yourself credit for.” 

“Please stop,” Virgil whispered, and it was such a blatant lie. He wanted this, wanted it to be real so badly. “Roman, I...I can’t--” 

He couldn’t take it. If the rug was pulled out from under him now, after coming so close to what he’d always so desperately wanted...he didn’t know how he was supposed to look anyone in the eye ever again. 

“I can go on,” Roman said. “And I will. I will help you see how easy you are to fall in love with if it’s the last thing I do, because you deserve to see yourself the way I see you. But I just...I need you to tell me you believe me. This isn’t a prank or a joke. I would never play with your feelings like that.” 

Roman...Roman wasn’t cruel. He could get over excited, he could take a bit longer to pick up on someone’s uneasiness, he could be loud or brash, but he would never try to hurt someone he called a friend. He wouldn’t try to hurt anyone. 

If this was a prank...it would have stopped by now. Right? Roman wouldn’t...he wouldn’t let it go this far. 

“Virgil?” Roman’s voice was soft, hopeful, and Virgil warily met his gaze. “I love you. I really, really do.” 

There was absolutely no way to stop the few stray tears that escaped at the raw emotion and adoration in those words, no way to fight against the way his breath hitched when Roman gently wiped them away with his thumb. 

Virgil wanted so desperately to respond, to apologize, to warn Roman that at this point, if this all turned out to be a joke he was never leaving his room again. 

But no words came out, Virgil still frozen in terror and treacherous hope. But slowly, cautiously, he reached forward to lace his fingers in Roman’s free hand. 

The Prince didn’t pull away, didn’t sneer or laugh or twist his face in disgust. He just smiled, and squeezed Virgil’s hand. 

“You can say no,” Roman said after a moment, never moving the hand that cupped Virgil’s cheek. He waited for Virgil to give a tiny nod before continuing. “Would it be alright if I kissed you?” 

And Virgil had definitely stopped thinking at this point, fear and self loathing suddenly losing control to something else, something much more brave than anxiety. 

He nodded wordlessly and before he could even blink Roman leaned forward, pressing their lips together, and Virgil felt his world melt away. 

It was careful and delicate and perfect, so much better than Virgil had ever imagined, and that cold ache in his heart, the one that longed for something he could never have, melted from Roman’s warmth. 

It only lasted a few seconds before Roman pulled away, but they were easily the best few seconds of Virgil’s entire life. If his heart decided to give out now, he didn’t think he would mind all that much. 

Roman didn’t go far, pressing their foreheads together, and Virgil leaned into the touch, smiling when he felt Roman rub his thumb along his knuckles. 

“I love you too,” Virgil blurted before he could stop himself, beyond relieved when Roman didn’t immediately shove him away. “I’m...I’m so sorry I thought--”

Roman quickly cut off the apology with another kiss, this one deeper than the first, and Virgil’s free hand instinctively moved up to grip his shirt. 

“I’m not upset,” Roman assured when they pulled back. “I just...hope I can help you see how perfect you really are.” 

Virgil smiled, hiding his blush against Roman’s chest as the prince wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close. 

“I forgot you’re a sap,” he muttered against the red sash. “Seriously though, you can be pissed at me for yelling at you.” 

“Well, I’m not. Besides, it all worked out, didn’t it? You didn’t flat out reject me which is...what I was expecting.” 

Virgil extracted himself from the embrace to look up at Roman, and suddenly it was the Prince's turn to quickly look away, brows furrowed. 

“Seriously?” Virgil asked. “You thought I would reject you?” 

“I wasn’t always...kind to you,” Roman admitted. “And...well, I know how I am. I can be loud and annoying and you don’t always like that. I’m not...exactly an easy person to love.” 

For a moment, Virgil had no idea what to say to that. He thought back to all the times he’d mulled over his feelings for Roman, envisioning all the possibilities he’d once thought were impossible. 

He’d tried to talk himself out of loving the Prince in an attempt to spare himself from the heartbreak. He told himself they were too different, too incompatible. It would never work even if Roman did feel the same. 

But now, seeing the Prince stare at the ground with his shoulders tense, like he was waiting for Virgil to agree and call the whole thing off...it was almost like looking in a mirror. 

Maybe they weren’t so different after all. 

“You’re wrong,” Virgil said, grabbing for Roman’s hands again. “So...so I guess we’re both going to help each other. To...you know. See how easy we are to love. And stuff.” 

And ok, he didn’t have Roman’s elegant way with words. But that wasn’t his job, and the Prince seemed to appreciate it anyway, worried frown replaced with a timid, yet brilliant smile. 

“I guess so,” Roman said, smiling never faltering, and Virgil found himself matching it. “I don’t think that’s such a bad thing.” 

That was the last thing Virgil heard before being pulled into another kiss, Roman nothing but warm, welcoming, and safe, and for the first time Virgil allowed himself to let go and relax.

[glitxhwayventeen]

Lonely Together

Jihoon: Chapter 1 (Perfect)

Characters: Jihoon x female reader

Genre/Warnings: multi-member au (different scenarios), werewolf au, fantasy, smut, angst, fluff, potential blood mentions, genocide, runaways, domestic violence, child abuse, abandonment, homelessness, hunger, violence. Any others will be put as warnings when future chapters are thought up/written.

Author’s Note: I recommend listening to Perfect by Ed Sheeran before reading this. That’s the song I thought of while writing this because it makes me feel some type of way you know?

Please remember that all of these chapters and the content within them are a work of fiction! They’re just for fun/entertainment!

Bold= Dialogue Italics= Thoughts

🥀 & ☁️

Lonely Together Master List

Chapter 1: Perfect

It had been so long since you’d been around so many people. It made you antsy. You didn’t understand a lot of what was going on in the house. The constant noise scared you. It had you on such an edge that you nearly screamed everytime one of them coughed.

To be fair, before you had met them, you’d honestly jump at footsteps. Because footsteps meant humans, and humans meant danger. Not to mention that you were still not used to being in your human form. You preferred to stay a wolf, you were stronger when you walked on all four legs, and you weren’t as noticeable.

Your human appearance was… striking to most people to say the least. Your bright eyes and darker skin with salt and pepper curly hair made everyone around you always stare at you. You understood it somewhat, you didn’t match everyone else’s looks in Korea. But that didn’t mean you liked people watching you all the time, you hated being the center of attention. So to say you were still adjusting to being around people after having lived alone for centuries was a bit of an understatement. It was all so new to you. You had a new feeling now too. You just weren’t sure what it was…

At first, you thought maybe it was hope. You hadn’t hoped in such a long time, it would bring tears to even the most hardened criminal’s eyes. But you weren’t that good at trusting that human part of you. So you decided to go off of what you knew. And, even though you hadn’t been there long, two weeks at the most you thought, you learned a lot of things about them. You knew all but one of the wolves had a mate. You knew that two of the alphas butted heads on how to lead the pack a lot and that one just watched from the side and did everything behind the scenes without causing too much distress to the others. You knew they all loved each other, no matter what they said or how much they fought. You also knew that, being around them made you feel more alone than you’ve felt in decades.

When you were younger, you didn’t mind being alone. It meant that you didn’t have to rely on anyone, it meant you only had to look out for yourself. And as you got older, it just felt… right. But being around this house full to the brim with people, you started to realize just how much you missed being part of a big family. They treated you like you were one of them. Which was weird to you… because they didn’t really know you. I mean sure they saved you from imminent death, but they didn’t know you from Adam.

The more you thought about your current situation, the weirder the feeling got. The closer you got to each one of them, the stronger the feeling got. And when you got close to one of the quiet ones in particular, you swore it felt like your heart was singing to you. It was something you weren’t sure you’d ever get used to, but it wasn’t something you necessarily hated either. Whatever the feeling was, you’d figure it out eventually or it would go away on its own… right?

Still, You got to eat first with the other mates, well the mates minus Soonyoung. He may have been Seungcheol’s mate but 1.) he was a wolf unlike the other mates and 2.) he was a male wolf so he ate just as much as the other boys did. So they didn’t think it fair that he get to eat with all of you. Or them…. Or-whatever. You didn’t know, you just knew they offered you and the other girls food first and, considering you used to have to hunt for your food or you didn’t get to eat, you were definitely NOT complaining. Soonyoung though, you learned, had a tendency to whine about any and everything that he didn’t like.

“Aww come on again! No fair! (Y/N)’s just as much of a wolf as I am! Why does SHE get to eat first when I don’t??” Soonyoung decided to voice aloud, grabbing his plate with both hands and semi-patiently waiting for his turn to grab food.

You didn’t mind of course. You did think he had a point. It didn’t seem fair to him. Either he should be eating with the other mates, or you should be eating with the other wolves. So you agreed.

“He’s got a point. I should be eating with the other wolves. I eat more than the other girls after all” you shrugged matter of factly to the lead alpha, who was also his mate, who was hunched over the stove making said breakfast.

The thing is, Seungcheol did understand the argument. And he personally saw merit to the concerns, whether it was because it was a genuine point or whether it was just from months of his mate complaining about it, he didn’t know. Still, he saw it’s reasonings and thought they could be sound.

BUUUT, he also knew that SOMEBODY would definitely NOT be happy if you had to wait and fight the boys for food. It seemed everyone, wolves and mates alike, but you understood that Jihoon had imprinted on you already. Maybe you just didn’t know much about it, or maybe you knew and just decided you didn’t want to know, either way, it wasn’t for him to decide or judge.

So, as he looked over to the table of boys who were ACTUALLY patiently waiting their turn to dig in, his eyes landed on Jihoon, who shook his head and narrowed his eyes at the older wolf in return. Of course you didn’t notice this action, you were always more in your own head than you were in conversations.

“Sucks to suck kids. I make the rules and I say you eat with the mates. End of story. Sorry love!” he declared, once again moving his eyes ever so slightly to Jihoon, who nodded his head slightly as he smiled triumphantly.

He was NOT about to let his newfound mate eat the other mates leftovers with the other wolves. No. That was absolutely NOT happening. He may not have “officially” expressed that you were his mate, but he’d be damned if he wasn’t gonna do everything in his power to make sure you were happy, healthy, and well fed.

“But-” you argued, trying to bring your point’s validity up to him again.

“But nothing (Y/N). Sure you eat more than the other girls. But you DEFINITELY don’t eat as much as the boys do. Even if you are a wolf. Besides you’re one of-” he trailed off just as someone around the room hit the table slightly and coughed. Everyone but you realized where he was going with that sentence, and Jihoon wasn’t ready to face that just yet.

“-One of our guests.” Seungcheol thought after a moment, clearly lying his ass off but hoping he did a good enough job that you didn’t notice. Luckily for him, you weren’t all that great at social cues. “Therefore you shall not be eating whatever’s left, you’ll get first dibs with the other girls.” He said as he sat one of the plates of remaining food left from what the mates couldn’t eat down on the table, kissing his pouting mates forehead in the process.

“Don’t worry about Soonyoung. He’s just a baby. He’ll get over it. You deserve to be eating with the mates.” Spoke the smallest boy of the pack with a smile that seemed to light up as bright as a bonfire whenever you looked him in the eyes. He was the one that had your heart singing whenever you were in the same room. His little declaration made your cheeks heat up.

“O-Okay, I guess. I still don’t think I’ve done anything to deserve the special treatment… but thank you” you resolved with a polite smile back, doing your best to hide the pink covering your face. His heart rate sped up to jackrabbit speed as his inner wolf seemed to beamed at your answer.

“No (Y/N). Thank YOU.” Hansol retorted with a shit eating grin on his face. What he wanted to say was “thanks for helping one of the assholes in the group become juuuuust a little less of an asshole by being his mate,” but obviously he couldn’t do that without getting his ass beat.

“Thank me? Thank me for what?” You questioned, genuinely curious as to what he was thanking you for. You hadn’t done anything to warrant a thank you… had you?

“Oh nothing. Don’t worry about it. You’ll find out… eventually” He let out, looking at Jihoon, earning a smack from the older wolf and a small growl. Though he whined for a second, Hansol still began to laugh at his actions.

“…Okaaaay…” you said, trying your best to forget the conversation as a whole so you could eat the remains of your pancakes. Man these guys are weird.

-

Jihoon wasn’t sure exactly what he should do. He knew he couldn’t deny his instincts forever. But he wasn’t so sure about this whole “mate” thing. I mean, who was he kidding, he got along better on his own. He survived on his own for his entire life, at the orphanage, at school, even in his pack. For the most part, he kept to himself. He was SEVERELY independent, and he liked it that way. People just always managed to bring attachments and strings. Even still, He couldn’t cut off his pack. I mean don’t get him wrong, he loved those idiots and would do anything for them, but fuck, if they didn’t have the dumbest ideas and get themselves into the stupidest shit sometimes.

He knew his survival instinct told him to just ignore the feelings he had for you and act like nothing happened to protect himself. It’s not like you had noticed anyways. But the wolf part of him loved the idea of having a mate. For the longest time, he had to sit around and watch his brothers find their mates and fall in deep love. He watched Seungcheol find Soonyoung first a few months after he had met him. Then Joshua found his mate, Mina, after a few weeks of knowing him. Even little Channie imprinted on his mate, Somi, after just two days of Jihoon being acquainted with him.

Before he knew it, it was just him left without one. They always seemed so… happy and he just… wasn’t. He didn’t mind of course. He was glad his brothers found happiness. But he soon came to realize how lonely being alone truly was. He’d see his pack and their mates do cute things and, his heart was struck with a dull pain that never seemed to lessen, and at the time he didn’t understand why that was. But when he saw you, he knew the whole time he was yearning for you. When he saw you, for once he didn’t completely loathe the idea of taking care of or protecting another person. Even if it meant becoming one of the “lovey people.” He saw you and, one bat of your beautiful eyelashes and he knew, he would gladly lay his life down for you. How could he not?

You were caring and kind, even if you didn’t like to show it. You held yourself high, even if you were small. You were little, but you were mighty. You were smart, yet funny. You hardly spoke, but when you did, it was always something memorable. You never seemed to hold your true self back. He already knew that you were Perfect for him, even if he’d hardly spoken to you. He just couldn’t help the sane part of him that was very weary of the whole situation.

As Jihoon debated his true feelings for you over his breakfast, the other wolves went and conversed with each other. They tried to speak to you too, but you never really had a lot to say. You preferred to listen, which they weren’t all that surprised at. Jihoon was the quiet, calm, smart wolf, so it’s no surprise that his mate was the same way. You’d both always seem to get lost in thought almost simultaneously. You’d both come back to Earth at the same time too, always with very similar excuses.

Though everytime your eyes met, you’d both look away, trying your best to hide the blushes that spread across both your cheeks. It was kind of cute and the pack loved that their brother wouldn’t have to be all alone any longer. He’d no longer have to just sit on the side lines while they all had the time of their lives. He now had you, even if you didn’t realize it yet. You could both be Lonely Together.

Another Author’s Note: I know this chapter is relatively short compared to the others I’ve written so far, but honestly, your girls tired as fuck. I work a full time job, go to school full time, and take care of a lot of my family’s household. Let’s just be lucky I can write at all. Plus, I wrote Wonwoo’s story earlier today too. So let’s just call it a success and I’ll write a better chapter for him next time!

(Updated 9/6)