#I played something like 20-40 hours of this when I first bought it but then put it on the backburner for years

[anghimalaaynasapuso]

PORN DIRECTOR KÖNIG

nsfw. 40s könig. come eating. pussy slapping. voyeurism. manhandling. degradation. squirting. sex work.

you never planned on doing porn.

you don't think anyone does, really. you had a whole different life mapped out— degree, stable job, retirement.

but college was bleeding you dry. bills stacked faster than you could pay them, textbooks cost more than your monthly groceries, and your financial aid office had the efficiency of a broken vending machine. part-time jobs barely kept the lights on. dinner was whatever was cheap and lasted the longest.

you worked, studied, scraped by, but it felt more like drowning in slow motion.

camming started as an experiment. a shot in the dark born from desperation.

you bought a cheap ring light from amazon, found a secondhand webcam on facebook marketplace, and set up your little filming space in the corner of your apartment. it was nothing fancy. the lighting was bad, the camera wasn’t great, and instead of a tripod you had a stack of books.

but it worked.

you slipped into the only matching lingerie set you owned— soft pink lace, delicate ribbons, tiny bows stitched in all the right places. sheer enough to tease, but still leaving just enough to the imagination. the bra straps slipped down your shoulders as you posed in front of the mirror, lips parted, fingers playing with the waistband of your panties.

picking the best ones, you captioned them with something playful then posted them to onlyfans, shut your laptop, and forgot about it. you weren’t expecting much. maybe a few subscribers, a little extra cash, nothing major.

then, your account blew up.

someone with a bit of reach had apparently found your photos and posted them to a a ddlg subreddit, and suddenly you were everywhere.

at first, you didn’t notice. but when you woke up to hundreds of new notifications, dms, and tips flooding in overnight, you started digging.

that’s when you saw it. a post on reddit. thousands of upvotes. hundreds of comments dissecting your photos in excruciating detail.

[r/ddlg] found this new onlyfans girl and i'm losing my mind. she’s so soft. look at her. look at her.

🔺14.3k upvotes 💬 793 comment

u/daddysfavorite456: this is the most perfect little babygirl i’ve ever seen wtf

🔺6.2k

u/sirspanksalot: the way she’s tugging her panties down just a little… i need a moment

🔺4.9k

u/subsugarplum: her little pout in the third pic is actually ruining my life

🔺3.3k

u/softdom_daddy: how do we make sure she never pays for anything again in her life?

🔺7.1k

your breath caught in your throat as you scrolled. every detail of your photos was being analyzed. obsessed over.

the way you tilted your head just slightly, eyes wide and doe-like. the way your fingers curled in the hem of your panties, like you were hesitating. like you needed permission. the little pout in the last photo, lower lip caught between your teeth, the faintest furrow in your brows.

suddenly, your subscriber count was doubling by the hour.

new subscribers flooded in overnight. your follower count jumped by thousands. dms piled up, requests, tips, compliments, outright begging.

"you're perfect. please let me take care of you." ($20 tip)

"you’re the softest little thing i’ve ever seen." ($50 tip)

"tell me you do custom videos. i’ll pay whatever." ($100 tip)

the sudden influx of attention was overwhelming. you barely had time to process it before people were demanding more.

demand skyrocketed. they were practically clawing at your metaphorical door, begging for more content, more variety— more, more, more.

for now, solo work was fine. it was safe. comfortable. easy to control. but you knew it wouldn’t be enough forever. you saw it in the comments, in the messages, in the ever-growing list of requests. they wanted more than just you and a camera. they wanted another presence. another body in the frame.

you debated your options. a studio would be the safest bet. you had the budget now— painstakingly built, every small tip, every renewal adding up until you finally had enough that you didn't need to comprise comfort.

but finding the right studio was another thing entirely.

you didn’t want the overproduced, garish lights and cheap theatrics of mainstream porn. you wanted subtlety. intimacy. something with taste. good lighting, soft edits, angles that captured the feeling rather than just the act.

something that matched the persona you had so carefully built.

you thought about it for weeks before finally bringing it up to valeria, a girl you often had collabs with.

she tilted her head when you mentioned it. "professional production..? you know there are a lot of seedy guys out there."

you nodded, worrying your lip between your teeth. you’d done enough research to know that most so-called "professional" setups were just glorified scams, with sleazy directors who treated performers like props.

valeria watched you for a second, then clicked her tongue. "but, if you ever actually follow through, i know a guy. a lot of the girls have worked with him before. big name in the business. respects his actors. good guy." she pulled out her phone. "i’ll send you his portfolio. put in a good word."

you meet könig a few weeks later, after countless back-and-forth emails, late-night calls hammering out details, discussions about setups, plot points, pricing. every conversation had been strictly professional so far and you appreciated the distinct lack of attempts to try and get in your pants.

you don’t expect to spot him the moment you step into the airbnb you rented for the shoot, but there he is, standing head and shoulders above the rest of the crew. and the first thing that strikes you isn’t his height (though jesus, he’s massive). it’s how out of place he looks.

he doesn’t carry himself like someone in the industry. doesn’t exude that easy sleaze, that over-familiar smirk you’ve come to expect from men in this business. no tight black tee straining over biceps, no carefully curated air of supremacy with just a hint of nicotine.

instead, he looks like someone’s dad who got lost on his way to a hardware store and somehow ended up in the adult industry instead.

his glasses are perched high on the bridge of his nose, pushed up with the absentminded shove of a knuckle. his sweater— soft, thick, comfortable— hangs loose on his frame, sleeves pushed up to reveal thick forearms dusted with silver hair. he’s dressed like he should be standing at a backyard grill, not directing an erotic film.

he’s older than you expected. forty, according to his portfolio, and he wears it well. silver threading through black, crow’s feet at the corners of sharp, washed-out blue eyes. his nose is crooked— like it had been broken once and never quite set right— makes his face look lived-in, a little rough around the edges. his stubble is light, a soft dusting of salt and pepper.

he looks warm.

he’s talking to someone. one of the crew, maybe, head dipped slightly, listening intently. but even hunched, even relaxed, his sheer size makes him loom.

and then the door clicks shut behind you, and he hears it. könig's head lifts, pale blue eyes settling on you in an instant.

he excuses himself with a quiet murmur. hands tucked into the front pocket of his pants, broad shoulders rolling slightly like he’s trying to make himself smaller, less imposing.

it doesn’t work.

“good to finally meet you,” he says, accent curling soft in his words.

oh, you think. you hadn’t expected that, either.

his voice is deep, just shy of being harsh. it's a far cry from the sharp tone you’d imagined after hearing him speak over the phone. there’s something smoother about it in person, a warmth undercutting the rough edges.

you shift the tray of coffee in your hands, balancing it carefully before setting it down on the small folding table near the entrance.

“brought coffee for everyone,” you say, wringing your hands because you refuse to brush them off on your dress.

he glances down at the cups, and for a second you think you see something soften in his expression.

“thoughtful,” he murmurs, and though his face remains unreadable, you can hear the approval in his voice.

you exhale, trying to shake off the nervous energy thrumming in your chest, and clear your throat. “figured caffeine would help. don’t wanna be the reason your crew collapses mid-shoot.”

könig huffs something close to a chuckle, tipping his head toward the set-up behind him. “they’ve worked under worse conditions.”

you’re not sure what that means, but before you can ask, he gestures for you to follow him further into the space.

the next few minutes are easy. professional. you go over the shot list, the angles he’s planning, how he likes to work— efficient and minimal retakes unless absolutely necessary. he asks about your preferences, what you don’t want, what you do.

it’s…comfortable. smoother than you expected. he’s patient, but direct. no wasted words, no unnecessary small talk, just the work. you like that.

and then your phone rings.

you pull it from your pocket without thinking, glancing at the name on the screen. simon riley. your co-star. you press accept, bringing the phone to your ear.

“hey, you on your way?” you ask, already stepping away from könig, mind half on the conversation you’d just been having.

but simon doesn’t answer right away. there’s a beat of silence. “can’t make it.”

your stomach drops. you stop short, pulse spiking. “what?”

“somethin’ came up. won’t be able to get there.”

you glance at könig, breath stalling in your throat. this cannot be happening.

“simon, i can’t reschedule,” you hiss, stepping further away, out of earshot. “i already paid for the location, the crew’s already here-”

“nothin’ i can do, sweetheart,” he interrupts, not unkind. “’m sorry.”

but sorry doesn’t fix this. sorry doesn’t change the fact that if you don’t shoot today, you’re out thousands. your grip tightens around your phone. “simon, please-”

the line clicks.

he’s gone.

panic creeps up your spine, cold sweat starting to form on your palms. you can’t not shoot today. you can’t afford it. the budget’s already stretched thin, and a reschedule isn’t just inconvenient— it’s impossible.

you drag a hand to wipe the sweat on your forehead.

könig’s eyes are on you and you can feel the heat of his gaze. when you turn, he asks, “problem?”

you open your mouth, hesitate. because what the fuck are you supposed to say? every option you can think of results in you losing a few hundred dollars at the minimum.

you figure the truth is the best option you've got. “simon's out.”

könig watches as your fingers tighten around your phone, knuckles turning white. you press your lips together, trembling just slightly before biting down.

he tilts his head, slow. "know anyone that can sub in?"

you shake your head immediately, too fast, too frantic. a sharp inhale makes your shoulders rise, lashes fluttering against the unshed tears that suddenly gloss your eyes.

fuck.

you’re going to cry.

könig shouldn’t be looking this closely.

shouldn’t be cataloging every shift of your body. shouldn’t be tracking how your throat works as you swallow, how the delicate line of your jaw tenses under pressure.

it’s detail that shouldn’t register. detail that has no purpose. no place. no right to send his thoughts careening somewhere they have no business going.

but there they go anyway.

because he's been watching you.

not in a way that's creepy— könig tells himself that, over and over. he was just a professional doing his research, getting a feel for his clients. it’s good business practice, staying informed, making sure he knows who he’s working with, what they bring to the table.

and if that research led him to your socials, to hours of footage in soft, honeyed lighting, to endless clips of you sprawled out on pristine white sheets as you mewled into the camera— well. that was just part of the job, wasn’t it?

nothing personal. certainly nothing unprofessional.

but the truth, the thing he never says out loud, not even to himself is that he’s spent far too many nights with his phone in one hand and his cock in the other, watching you through the screen.

watching you in those tiny lingerie sets. pink and white lace, frilly little bows, the kind of girlish softness that makes his teeth ache.

könig's watched every fucking video. every stream. every post. hours spent with his laptop open, pants shoved down around his hips, hand working his cock as you bat your lashes and moan so sweetly it makes his head spin.

‘am i a good girl?’ you breathe into the mic, like you’re talking right to him. like you know.

and god, does he know you.

he’s studied you. learned you. mapped out every twitch, every tell, every fleeting flicker of pleasure that crosses your pretty face. the way your brows pinch together when you’re getting desperate. the way your lips part right before you come, glossy and swollen, tongue darting out to wet them like you want something in your mouth, like you’re inviting someone to grab you by the jaw and fuck your throat until you can’t think.

he’s seen how your thighs start to tremble when you edge yourself too long. how your back arches off the sheets when you finally let go, hips rolling into your own hand, breath catching in your throat as you fall apart in a mess of shuddery gasps.

könig has jerked off to all of it.

not just once. not just twice.

so many times he’s lost count.

sometimes slow, drawing it out to hear that little whimper you make at the end— the one that sounds like you’ve been fucked dumb.

sometimes rough. desperate. chasing his own release with one hand fisted in the sheets and the other pumping his cock.

it drives him fucking crazy.

it’s worse up close. worse when you shift on your feet, looking up at him from beneath your lashes, trying to hold yourself together.

stop.

he clenches his fists. drags in a breath through his nose. he is not some fucking rookie. not some kid who can’t keep his head straight.

but then you make a sound that crawls under his skin and sinks deep. and suddenly his thoughts are careening somewhere they shouldn’t go—

places where that breathy little sound is choked out against his palm. where those fingers twisting at your sleeves are scrabbling at his belt instead, pulling, fumbling, desperate.

his cock twitches.

jesus christ.

it’s perverse. it’s wrong. twenty years between you. he shouldn't even be thinking about you like this. but then he thinks about how small your hands would look trying to wrap around his cock. how easily he could press you up against the nearest wall, let you feel how bad he wants you, let you know exactly what you do to him—

and yeah.

he’s fucked.

his grip tightens on the coffee cup, knuckles white, cardboard crumpling in his palm.

"we can reschedule." it’s the logical thing to say. the right thing.

but you stiffen immediately, shaking your head almost violently, like the mere suggestion hurts.

"i can’t." your voice wobbles. "i don’t have the budget for it. the airbnb, the crew- if we don’t shoot today, it’s done. i lose it."

he can hear the distraught in your voice, the panic creeping in, rising in your throat. and könig— könig has never been good at ignoring that kind of thing.

his jaw tightens. his fingers flex. his pulse pounds in his ears. and before he can think better of it—

"i can do it."

your head jerks up, eyes locking onto his. wide. startled.

"what?"

könig lifts a broad shoulder, deceptively casual, ignoring how his pulse is hammering in his throat. acting as if he didn’t just offer himself up like it was nothing.

"i can do it," he repeats. "you need a scene partner."

he pauses, just long enough to make sure you’re really listening before he adds, pointed: "i’ve done worse for less."

it’s true too. könig had started shooting for money, not for passion, not for art. there were years where he took any job that paid, no matter how grimy, no matter how degrading. no dignity in it, no careful framing, no thoughtful direction. just harsh lighting, rough hands, the sound of too many bodies shifting in too little space.

it’s not like that anymore.

now, he works for himself. he makes art, in his own way. he only takes projects that meet his standards, only shoots what he knows will look good.

and this, you, would look incredible.

"are you-" you swallow hard, throat working, voice tight. "you’re serious?"

könig lets out a short, amused breath, tilting his head. "wouldn’t offer if i wasn’t."

your gaze flickers down to his mouth, just for a second, before snapping back up.

he notices. of course he fucking notices.

you hesitate, worrying your lip between your teeth, and he wants— god, he wants.

he lifts his coffee, takes a slow sip. watches you.

"think it through," he says, letting the accent curl around the words. "do you trust me?"

you stare at him, breath coming in short, uneven pulls. your fingers tighten around your phone.

and then, even though you probably shouldn't, you nod.

this is insane, is all you can think as your hands smooth down the dress, fingertips catching on the fabric’s delicate weave. it sways when you move, hem teasing the tops of your thighs.

the crew picked it because it feels normal, something someone’s wife might wear on a lazy sunday, waiting for her husband to walk through the door. not lingerie, not tight or short or scandalous. innocent.

somehow, that makes it worse.

the set sprawls before you, carefully crafted to mimic home. the couch sits comfortably worn— or at least looks like it, upholstery creased just enough to suggest years of use. a blanket lies draped over the back, fringes brushed out to seem effortless.

the coffee table holds small artifacts of a life: a half-empty mug with a faint lipstick stain, a book splayed open, pages curled, a pair of keys glinting under the warm overhead glow. off to the side, a framed photo perches, two strangers caught in mid-laugh, frozen happiness you’re supposed to claim as yours.

the lighting bathes it all in amber. soft, forgiving. like sunset spilling through a window that doesn’t exist. everything is designed to feel. to pull the viewer into a scene that isn’t real but wants to be. warmth. comfort. longing.

your pulse trips. nerves coil tight under your. stepping out, you inhale–

and there he is.

könig stands beside the couch, posture loose, almost as if he’s holding himself back from something. the uniform strains against him, fabric pulled taut across broad shoulders and the solid line of his chest. it’s glaringly obvious that it wasn’t tailored for a man like him— you doubt anything ever is— but he wears it like it belongs to him anyway. the belt grips a tapered waist, dog tags resting cold against his sternum. they glint when he shifts, catching the warmth of the lights.

he’s big. that part you knew. everyone knows. but there’s something about seeing him like this, the bulk of him filling the space, boots planted, arms crossed, sleeves clinging to thick forearms, that makes your breath catch in your throat.

he looks like he could hold the world in his hands. break it if he wanted.

then he lifts his head. and his gaze finds you.

it hits like a physical weight, gravity pulling you closer.

his eyes track the line of your body. starting from your face, drifting down, and back up again. for a moment you assume he’s taking inventory, cataloguing details you didn’t know you were offering.

your skin prickles under the attention. heat pooling low, spreading outwards.

könig’s jaw shifts. a muscle ticks. his fingers flex where they rest against his bicep, knuckles pale for half a second before he eases them loose.

you swallow. "do i look okay?"

silence stretches. then: "you look perfect."

his voice sounds like it's been scraped raw from something you can’t name. and you know you shouldn’t take his words to heart. shouldn’t make something out of nothing. he was just being polite—

but god, he doesn’t stop looking.

you breathe out. "are we ready?"

that seems to snap him out. könig exhales, nostrils flaring. “yeah," he says, looking away.. "we’re ready."

you nod and he turns, clapping his hands together.

"quiet on set!" his voice cuts through the chatter. "lights- ready? camera?"

a muffled ‘rolling!’ comes from behind the equipment.

he glances back, stepping into place. "sound?"

"speed!"

he nods, shoulders shifting under the snug uniform. "all right. action on me. three... two..."

his gaze flickers forward, locks onto you. his hand lifts, a silent ‘ready?’

you nod.

"action!"

the front door creaks open.

you see him first— broad shoulders filling the doorway, boots heavy against the worn rug you picked out last fall. his bag drops with a dull thump, keys jangling, and for a beat, you just stand there, watching.

it doesn't feel real. something out of a dream. your husband looks older somehow. tired. lines carved a little deeper around his eyes, hair at his temples brushed with more gray than before.

it's longer now too, the ends curling where sweat and travel have left it mussed.

then his gaze lifts, blue catching yours. and that’s all it takes.

you move.

your feet carry you faster than you realize, dress fluttering against your legs as you throw yourself into him.

könig catches you with a small grunt, part effort, part relief, hardly moving from his spot. strong arms close around you as he lifts you off the floor with an ease that's almost unfair.

his hand finds the back of your thigh, fingers splayed wide. "easy, sweetheart," he murmurs, voice rough from disuse, deepened by exhaustion and age. there’s an edge to it, earned from years of barking orders and nicotine abuse. "still getting old, you know."

you huff a breath that’s almost a laugh. "you’re not that old."

"hm." könig presses his face into your hair. "tell that to my back."

your chest tightens. god, you missed him. missed the way he smells— soap, leather, that faint trace of cologne you’d tucked into his bag months ago, almost worn off, but still miraculously there. you press your nose to his neck, breathing him in, and whisper, "missed you."

"missed you more." when he pulls back, his gaze traces every line of your face, eyes crinkling at the corners. "lemme take a good look at you, baby."

heat blooms in your cheeks, but you let him. there’s something reverent about his gaze when you meet his eyes.

then, he kisses you.

and fuck.

it’s messy. warm. his mouth is rough against yours, stubble scraping your skin, tasting like coffee burned down to the dregs.

"god," you breathe, voice catching on a gasp. "i love you."

könig chuckles, pressing his forehead to yours. "love you too," he murmurs, using that voice he saves for early mornings when you’re tucked against him, trading lazy kisses and whispered secrets.

his hands slide down to your hips, pulling you close. the world tilts, narrows, until there’s nothing but him. his body, his breath, the scratch of his stubble when he tilts his head, brushing his nose against yours.

then his fingers slip under your dress. his breath hitches the moment he finds you bare, his touch grazing soft folds, sticky and warm with slick.

"no panties?" his voice dips somewhere between a laugh and a growl.

heat blooms in your stomach. you bite your lip, shrugging. "figured you'd appreciate it."

his gaze darkens, blue eclipsed by black. "oh, do i."

könig’s fingers slide between your folds, dragging through the slick mess you’ve already made. you flinch at the contact, hips twitching toward him before you can catch yourself.

he pushes it in, slow. the stretch punches a gasp out of you, walls fluttering around the intrusion. he pauses, ignores your whine, brows drawing together, finger knuckle-deep. "did you get tighter?"

his voice is soft, almost like he’s talking more to himself than you, words slipping out under his breath.

his finger curls, pressing snug against your walls, testing just how much resistance it meets.

you whimper, thighs twitching, nails digging into the fabric of his jacket. "m-maybe if you fucked me more, i wouldn’t be."

the words tumble out before you can think to stop them. your pulse skips as you process what you just said. heat floods your face.

könig’s head tilts. his eyes flick up, narrowing, — not angry, not exactly— but his stare steals the breath from your lungs all the same. your lips part, trying to fumble out an apology stuck at the back of your throat when—

slap.

he pulls his finger free and smacks your pussy.

you squeak, body jerking as the sting blooms quick and hot between your legs, warmth spreading through your skin, rushing up your spine. you’re caught between shock and the low, simmering heat that pools in your belly.

"careful," könig warns although his tone is deceptively light. his fingers tap against your clit in soft, featherlight pulses of teasing pressure that makes your thighs jump. "keep that attitude and i’ll slap this pretty little thing five times. make you count every single one. s’that what you want?"

your cunt clenches, slick dribbling down to coat his knuckles. he feels it, of course he does. feels how your body betrays you, responding before your mind can catch up.

chest heaving, you shake your head, breath shivering out of you. "no-"

"no?" he echoes a soft mockery, fingers dragging through the mess between your thighs, spreading it just to hear the wet sound it makes echo in the space between you. "then behave, sweetheart. don’t make me teach you."

your heart pounds, breath coming in little gasps as you offer him a jerky nod. könig only watches with lazy half-lidded eyes.

"now," he murmurs, finger filling you again. "gonna ask one more time. have you gotten tighter..." his thumb brushes your clit, just enough to make you twitch, "...or have i just left you empty for too long?"

heat surges through you. your hands clutch at his jacket, grounding yourself in the weight of him. your face burns.

"you were gone for so long," you whisper, voice small, shame curling in your stomach.

he sighs. something in his gaze softens, guilt threading through his voice. "i know, baby." his forehead presses against yours. “missed you too."

you sniffle, nuzzling into his shoulder. "y-you can’t go away that long again..." the words tremble, cracking at the edges.

he kisses your temple, breath warm against your skin. "i won’t," he lies, gentle. "let me stretch you out, yeah?"

könig guides you further into your home, coaxing you down on the couch. könig kneels between your legs, broad hands spreading you open and drinking in the sight of you laid out before him.

"look at you," he murmurs, thumb dragging through your folds, gathering your slick up to rub slow circles against your clit. "so wet for me already. miss having me inside, huh?"

your fingers clutch at the cushions as he begins to fill you, head tipping back. "yes-"

"you gotta watch, pretty," könig interrupts, fingers tilting your chin back down.

your gaze drops, breath catching when you see it— his thick fingers buried deep inside you, slick dribbling down his knuckles. the gold band around his finger shines beneath the mess you’ve made, drenched, the sight obscene and somehow more intimate than you’re prepared for. your walls flutter around him, clenching down like your body’s desperate to keep him there.

"look at that.” he grind. "look at your cute little cunny... makin’ a mess all over me."

your cheeks burn. you squirm, trying to close your thighs, but his other hand tightens on your hip, keeping you spread. "no hiding," he says. "told you to watch."

so you do.

you watch the slow drag of his fingers pulling out, coated in slick that strings between you. your cunt clenches around nothing, throbbing, and you let out a soft, desperate whimper. könig hums, pleased, pressing back in. "look how well you take me," he says, dragging against that spot inside that makes your vision blur.

you whimper, head spinning, hips grinding down onto his hand. "feels so good-"

"yeah?" he presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh. "gonna let me in now, sweetheart? let me fill you up nice and slow?"

you nod, frantic, words lost to the heat coiling low in your stomach. könig smiles, pulling his fingers free. you whine at the loss.

"shh," he soothes, wiping his slick-covered fingers against the head of his cock, spreading you over himself. "gonna take care of you. just lay back and be good for me, yeah?"

his hands grip your thighs, pressing them up toward your chest, folding you beneath him. your skin burns under the pressure, nerves sparking with every shift of his weight. the blunt head of his cock nudges against your entrance. he’s patient, achingly so— dragging it along your folds, gathering your slick, smearing it along his length until you’re soaked enough that he doesn’t have to rip you open.

könig’s gaze drops to where you’re spread open for him. "ready?"

you nod, breath catching in your throat, but it’s barely a sound, barely a thought when he starts to press in. he breaches you, the thick crown of his cock pushing past your entrance. your cunt clenches on instinct, trying to force him out, but könig presses on.

every inch feels like fire licking up your spine, burning through every nerve until you’re nothing but sensation.

"gonna fill you up, sweetheart.” his voice is a low rumble that vibrates through your bones. "stretch you out every day i’m home-" he drives forward another inch, making your back arch, "-’til this pretty cunt just opens up for me."

you can’t speak. can’t think. everything narrows down to the drag of him inside you, veins and ridges catching on the soft walls of your cunt. your mind spins, vision blurring as your hips jerk, instinctively trying to escape the overwhelming fullness. his fingers bite into your thighs, holding you in place.

"uh-uh," he murmurs, dark amusement curling at the edges of his words. "don’t run, baby. you wanted this."

he braces himself, broad shoulders tense above you as he tries to sink deeper. but even with how wet you are, how pliant you’ve gone beneath him, your body refuses to give. his hips stutter, pushing, pushing— yet still, there’s that impossible last inches he can’t force past.

“p-please- need it, need you-” the words spill out as he pauses, pulling back an inch.

"i know, baby, i know," he pants, forehead pressing to yours, sweat slick between you, before rolling his hips back in, trying his damn best to bottom out, but your cunt clenches stubbornly. frustration twists across his face, the sight of you writhing beneath him, cunt stretched wide and still too tight to take him fully— it drives him insane.

"gonna have to fix that," he murmurs, thumb brushing a tear from your cheek.

you nod, dazed, tears slipping down your temples as you sob out a choked, "yes- yes, please-"

"shh," könig soothes, leaning in to kiss the corner of your mouth. "you’re doin’ so good, baby. takin’ me so well. just need to open you up a little more, yeah?"

könig adjusts his grip, hands sliding beneath your knees, lifting you with ease. before you can even register the shift, he’s pulling you up against his chest, arms hooking beneath your legs, locking you back in a full nelson.

your breath stutters, eyes going wide as your body is left entirely at his mercy, weightless in his grip, spread open around him.

könig’s lips graze your ear. "gonna let gravity help us, yeah? lil bit of science. let’s see if this pretty little cunt can take all of me now."

your toes curl, breath hitching as he angles his hips, smearing your slick between you.

then he lets gravity do most of the work.

your breath leaves you in a shattered moan as your body sinks down, forced open as he drops you down on his cock. your walls flutter, clenching around him, stretched impossibly wide, struggling to take him, but he doesn’t stop, doesn’t let you squirm away.

"that’s it," könig groans, arms flexing as he holds you still, keeps you spread. "so fuckin’ good for me, baby. lettin’ me stretch you open- gonna make you take it all."

you whimper, drool slipping from the corner of your lips, eyes rolling back as the last stubborn inch finally, finally sinks in, his cock seated fully inside you for the first time.

"fuck," könig grits out. "that’s my girl. knew you could take it, baby. knew you just needed a little help."

könig doesn’t give you much of a chance to adjust. the moment he thinks you're ready, his arms tighten, muscles flexing as he hauls you up before slamming you back down.

you jolt, cunt forced to stretch and squeeze around him with every thrust. his strength controls everything— the pace, the depth, the way you bounce like a ragdoll, helpless to slow him down. he’s slamming himself inside, spearing you open over and over, forcing you to stretch wider than you ever have.

you can’t keep up. your limbs go slack, muscles useless, brain short-circuiting. your vision blurs, eyes rolling back, drool slipping from the corner of your lips as your mouth falls open in a silent scream.

könig chuckles, pleased, watching the way you’ve gone completely limp in his arms. "gonna stretch you out like this every single day. keep you full, fuck you dumb, make sure this little cunt remembers who it belongs to."

your body convulses, wracked with sensation too intense to hold in. könig keeps moving, fucking you onto his cock like he’s trying to break you in, to shape your cunt to his cock.

"n-no-" your voice barely comes out. a sob caught in your throat as your fingers claw weakly at his forearms. your legs shake, eyes welling up, tears spilling hot down your cheeks. "g-gonna pee," you whimper, body locking up.

"no, baby." he drags you down harder, grinding the thick head of his cock against that perfect spot inside you. "you’re gonna cum. gonna make a mess all over me, aren't you?"

your sob turns into a choked wail as you gush, squirting hard, the release almost violent, soaking könig's thighs, dripping down to form a puddle on the floor beneath you.

könig watches you fall apart with hooded eyes, holding you up as your body jerks and trembles in his arms. "good girl," he praises, sounding utterly enthralled by the mess you’ve made. "fuckin’ knew you’d soak me- knew you were just a little messy thing."

you slump against him, muscles useless. the aftershocks have you so dazed that you barely register the shift before you’re being turned, pressed down against the floor, cheek squished against the slick puddle you just made.

"könig-" you whimper, trying to lift yourself, but his broad hand presses between your shoulder blades, keeping you down, keeping you open.

he ignores you, fingers digging into your hips, adjusting your position, spreading you wider. he lines himself up and pushes in, stuffing you to the brim in one deep thrust. your fingers claw at the wet floor beneath you, the slick sound of him sinking into you obscene in the quiet.

"good fuckin’ girl," he drags his cock out before slamming back in, his thighs slapping against your ass. "just let me use you, yeah? just take it like my perfect little cumdump."

you sob into the mess beneath you. könig presses your face harder against it, his broad palm splayed between your shoulder blades, keeping you pinned.

"lick it up," he orders, tone smooth, assured, the kind of voice that expects obedience.

your whole body burns, but the heat between your legs is hotter. könig feels the way you clench around him at the command, the way your body betrays you before your lips can even form a protest.

"kö-”

“don’t make me say it twice, sweetheart," he warns, hips pulling back, dragging his cock out until only the tip stretches you open.

"what’s the matter?" he mocks. "you were so eager to make this mess- now you’re going shy?"

your breath shudders out in a small whimper before you obey, lowering your head, tongue flicking out, just barely grazing the puddle beneath you.

könig clicks his tongue. "that’s not licking, that’s teasing."

his hips snap forward, knocking you further into the mess, forcing your mouth against it. your lips part with a gasp, and könig watches, eyes dark and hungry, as you taste yourself properly for the first time.

"there we go," he hums, smug satisfaction. "now clean up every drop."

your cheeks burn as you press your tongue flat to the floor, licking a slow, tentative stripe through the mess. the taste floods your mouth and your stomach twists— but the weight of könig’s cock inside you, the way he keeps you full and stretched and pinned beneath him, sends another rush of slick dripping down your thighs.

he notices. of course he notices.

"oh, sweetheart," he breathes. "you like this, don’t you?"

your body betrays you again, a little shiver running down your spine, your cunt fluttering around him.

"mm, you do." he chuckles, dragging his fingers through your hair, tightening his grip. "filthy little thing. you’re gettin’ off on this."

you squeeze your eyes shut, shame crawling up your throat.

"könig-"

"uh-uh," he interrupts, grip tightening, making you whimper. "keep licking, schatz. don’t stop ‘til it’s gone."

your tongue flicks out again, lapping up another mouthful, swallowing it down even as heat prickles behind your eyes.

könig groans at the sight, his free hand stroking down your spine, over the curve of your ass. "that’s it, baby," he breathes. "such a good little slut for me."

you whimper, thighs squeezing together, hips rocking subtly against him, desperate for friction, for anything.

he notices that, too. "oh, you poor thing," he coos, all false sympathy, fingers stroking your cheek where it’s damp with tears. "s’this gettin’ you all worked up?"

könig pulls back just a little, dragging his length through your overstretched walls. "you gonna come just from this?" he asks, rolling his hips. your body tenses, toes curling. "from licking your mess off the floor like a good little bitch?"

your face burns, whole body trembling. too full, too overwhelmed, too much— and yet, you nod, a choked little sob escaping your lips.

his pace stutters, burying himself to the hilt with a ragged groan, holding you still as he spills inside, his cock twitching, pumping thick ropes of cum into your swollen cunt. "fuck," he pants, chest heaving, his weight bearing down on you. "so good, baby. took me so fuckin’ well."

his cum is hot inside you, sticky, leaking, seeping out around his cock as he slowly pulls back, watching his spend start to slip from your overstretched hole. könig hums, almost thoughtful. he presses a broad palm against your pussy, scooping it up, pushing it back in with two thick fingers, shoving his spend as deep as it’ll go. "keep it in,” he says almost absentmindedly. he lifts his hand after a moment, tilting his head as he examines the way it drips from his fingers.

his free hand cups your jaw, tilting your face up. your lips part before he even has to tell you. "clean it up," he slides his ring finger past your lips.

your lashes flutter, heat prickling up your spine as you close your lips around him, sucking gently, swirling your tongue over the ridges of his finger, tasting yourself, tasting him.

könig groans, thumb stroking over your cheek, watching your lips stretch around the digit, tongue flicking against the band wrapped around his finger.

"good girl," he breathes, eyes hooded, cock twitching against your slick folds, already stirring again, already wanting more.

he presses his finger deeper, until it nudges against the back of your throat, until your breath stutters and your eyes go hazy, wet.

"so pretty like this.” his other hand slips between your legs again, rubbing slow circles over your swollen clit. "gonna keep you like this forever, wife. nice and full."

he pulls his finger from your mouth with a soft pop, watching the way your tongue flicks out after it, lips wet, eyes dazed. "gonna make you a mommy.” he grins. “fill you up every night until it takes.”

“-and cut!”

[quarterlifekitty]

Something, something, König picking up gaming in his free time, not uncommon for an older guy especially with a cute little thing who has a nice set up for gaming and he absolutely takes to it with flying colours. Kinda pissing you off how he’s gotten leagues better than you at one of your favourites in such a short amount of time. So when that skin you absolutely NEED drops you’re going insane grinding for it. It’s frustrating too because all the sweats have come out of the woodwork to grind for it too, leading to a lot of swearing and groaning on your end, coincidentally, König’s free time aligns and he’s more than happy to help you grind the tougher parts if you sit pretty on his lap and drain his pent cock.

What’s better than two stress relievers when he comes home from a high tension workplace environment?

(Bonus points if he’s your weird online long distance boyfriend who definitely told you an age younger than what’s on his ID and the place he comes home to is just your apartment that he decided was his too.)

Brother. The way this ask is in my mind. I would like to preface this by saying if you or a loved one is playing a video game with microtransactions and limited edition skin drops it’s not too late to get help. We can beat this together.

cw: he’s kind of a creep in this. Red flags abound. Somno/dubcon type stuff

Gonna make a couple of amendments to this one if that’s ok. 1) König is never going to be a god gamer because his hands are too fucking big and also I WANNA BE THE DOMINANT GAMER IN THE RELATIONSHIP. My ass is carrying HIM in apex. I don’t care that he knows how to shoot real guns. Don’t take this away from me

2) while he didn’t outright lie about his age, he did not say shit that would lead you to believe this man was over 40. He shared very few details about his personal life. Just that he was in the military, Austrian, and now? A gamer. Those are all the hallmarks of being a man in his 20s! Except the Austrian thing— that can happen to anyone.

I like to imagine he treats you like his discord kitten tho. You ask how old he is and he’s like “I’m an adult, if that’s what you’re worried about” or “old enough” or “don’t worry about it” and you say “okay 💖 yay 💖”

And he’s 100% your sugar daddy. Constantly buying you games just so you can co-op with him, gifting you in-game currency to spend on battle passes, absolutely ravaging your wishlist— steam, amazon, or otherwise.

He finds himself in your area for work and you tell him your address so he can meet up with you.

And you’re kind of a stupid femcel so when this dude shows up at your door, almost seven feet tall and wearing a surgical mask, scarred face with a healthy grey streak in his hair, it’s not setting off any alarm bells. There’s like at least 5 red flags here but you’re colorblind and inviting him in.

You didn’t realize that he was planning on staying with you while he was in the area. You also didn’t realize that the moment he found out he’d be stationed near you, he decided it was time to take your relationship to the next level.

Which is how you end up stretched out on his cock on the same day that you met in person for the first time, with him grunting in your ear about how he dreamed of this— thought of it every time he jerked off when you fell asleep during a discord call. He could tell just from your voice that you’d be pretty and soft and tight and perfect for him— and he was ready to settle down.

Good thing you didn’t really have any plans for the rest of your life, or you might find how fast he moves a little scary.

So it makes sense that you’re still a little shy. Too nervous to initiate things usually. So he just has to motivate you a little.

This skin’s an exclusive, can’t be earned with currency, and available as a drop for just 7 days. You can’t put in the hours to get it on your own, not to mention how tedious it is, and it can’t be bought. But it’s so cute.

So he makes the offer. He’ll spend his precious leave time helping you earn it if you keep his cock warm while he does it. He’d initially planned on using that time to rearrange your guts, so you’re gonna have to make it worth his while.

And maybe you exaggerate a little. You’re used to saying these things over calls— where nothing has any repercussions in the real world. Where you can promise anything from the safety of being on a screen a world away.

You tell him you’ll let him do whatever he wants to you if he can get that skin for you. After a moment you realize the implications of saying that to someone who can and will hold you down and make out with your cervix using the tip of his cock.

He borrows one of your elastics to tie back his hair.

He’s gonna get you that skin. And then he’s gonna get you pregnant.

You did say anything.

[lucy90712]

Can you do something similar to your giving birth post but with Jude pleaseee 🩷

"Are you sure you'll be ok here on your own I can get mum to stay back and be with you just in case" Jude said 

"No don't worry about it I'll be fine the c section is scheduled for next week and I'm making it till then I'm manifesting it" I said half joking 

"Your pregnancy has been full of surprises but if you want to believe that then go ahead" he laughed 

"We're staying put for just one more week aren't we guys" I said talking to the babies 

"I'll see you tomorrow morning baby but please text me if anything does happen I'll find a way to get back in time" he said 

"See you tomorrow I'll miss you" I said giving him one last kiss before he left for his game 

Once he was gone I thought more about what he said and he's not wrong nothing has exactly gone to plan so far in my pregnancy. We knew we wanted a baby but I got pregnant quicker than we were expecting so when we found out at my 12 week scan we were having twins that was hard to come to terms with. At 20 weeks we first found out we were having two girls but then at my next appointment we found out they were wrong the first time and we are expecting one boy and one girl. I still don't quite believe that even though I've seen the scans for myself which is why everything we've bought ourselves so far has been completely neutral even if family have bought pink and blue baby grows I refuse to waste money incase the doctors were actually right the first time. 

To try and avoid any more surprises I have a c section scheduled for when I turn 38 weeks as that's what my doctor thought would be best. It was always unlikely I'd make it to 40 weeks with twins and my doctor didn't want me to get that far as there becomes a point it's better for the twins to come out rather than stay in so we decided a c section was best. I have everything planned ready for that day; my hospital bag is already packed, the car seats are in the car and I've tried my best to mentally prepare for the surgery and the recovery. As much as I've tried to prepare I'm still incredibly scared of giving birth even if it is through c section as I know any number of things could go wrong and with how much has been thrown at us so far I can't help but think something will go wrong during the birth. 

My determination to make it to my c section date was only half a joke as all day I've been feeling slight cramps in my lower back which I know from reading a million books on pregnancy and birth is a first sign of early labour. I know deep down I should've told Jude to stay but I'll feel like an idiot if it turns out to be a false alarm and I make him miss a game for nothing and then have to miss another for my c section next week. However if this does turn out to be the start of labour I will be completely on my own as Jude will be gone and so will his family as they are travelling to watch the game. I would usually be going with them but I'm not allowed to fly and I can't bring myself to sit in a car for the 5 hours it would take to get to the city Jude is playing in. 

The slight cramps turned into contractions quite quickly but they were still quite far apart and not much more painful than the cramps but they were certainly uncomfortable. I should've called Jude as soon as they started but I was in denial that I was really in labour because I'm not ready to give birth yet I was going to have to be ready in a week not now and I'm scared to even think about how difficult things will be with twins. To stop myself panicking too much I decided it would be a good idea to bake some cookies as I'm always craving cookies and baking has often proved as a good distraction for me. When I got up there was a sudden rush of liquid down my leg which could only be one thing and suddenly nothing was going to distract me from the fact that these babies are coming now. 

I have no choice but to call Jude now but he should be getting on the plane any time now so I have to be quick and hope it's not too late for him to come back home. Luckily he always keeps his phone on until the very last second so if he doesn't answer I'll know I'm too late and I'm doing this on my own. I pressed the call button and listen to it ring and ring and ring until Jude finally answered which was such a relief that I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding. 

"Is everything ok love?" Jude asked 

"My waters just broken please tell me it's not too late for you to come back home" I said 

"I'm on the steps to get on the plane so let me quickly talk to Carlo and I'll be home as quick as I can" he said 

"Please stay on the phone with me I can't do this on my own" I said 

"Of course baby I'll be right here until I get home" he said 

I heard him run down the steps to the plane and talk to Carlo who let him go straight away then he was trying to talk to me as much as possible while running through the airport and back to the the team bus which luckily was still there and took Jude back to the training ground so he could drive home. The whole time he was helping me through my contractions and doing his best to time them for me as funnily enough I wasn't really thinking about pressing a button on my phone when I was in pain. 

Jude finally made it home close to an hour later and he gave me a hug and a few kisses before running off to get my hospital bag and pack all the last minute things that needed to be packed then put it in my car which has the car seats in. My doctor has told me that if I did go into labour before my c section date I had to come to the hospital straight away so they could monitor both babies and make sure both of them and I were ok so we got straight in the car to head to the hospital. I never realised how bumpy the roads in Madrid were until we went over them while I was having a contraction which only made it hurt more. The traffic also seemed to be awful so it took us ages to get to the hospital but we eventually made it and I was given a delivery room straight away. 

We'd barely put the bags down when doctors and nurses came in the room to get me on the bed and strap me onto what looked like a million monitors. First I had an ultrasound as at my last appointment one of the babies was breech so they wanted to check if that had changed. I wasn't able to see the monitor but there must've been something interesting on there as all of the medical staff left the room to talk outside. I wasn't too keen on the fact that Jude and I were being left out of whatever was being discussed seeing as they are our babies I feel like we should get some say or at least be told what's going on. Everyone they all came back in and started looking at the contraction and heart rate monitors I was attached to. 

"Everything looks good both babies are head down and you are progressing nicely so we will allow you to have a natural delivery if you would like but of course you can still elect to have a c section" the doctor finally explained 

"I don't know Jude what do you think is best?" I asked turning to him 

"That’s not a decision I can make for you it's your body and you're the one that's going to have to recover after" he said 

"I think I'd like to try and deliver naturally" I said 

"Ok we will take a few of these monitors off so you can get up and walk around but of course if anything changes we may still have to do a c section" the doctor said 

"Of course thank you doctor" I said 

Then we were finally alone and I got to just breathe for a minute as I feel like I haven't had a second to really take in the fact that I'm about to give birth. My peace lasted all of a few minutes before another contraction hit and I grabbed Jude's hand and squeezed it so tight it probably hurt him a little but that was the least of my worries. Jude didn't bat an eye he was just there to support me and helped me breathe through it which actually did help. The midwife I suggested I bounce on the birthing ball if I wanted to speed things up and there's nothing I wanted more than for this to be over so Jude helped me up and I sat on the ball while he sat on a chair across from me. 

After what felt like forever the doctor came back in to check on me but before I knew it there was like a million people in the room again and they told me I needed an emergency c section as one of the babies heart rate had dropped. Hearing that was really scary it made me worry about if everything would be ok and because the doctors needed to act quick they took me away from Jude. They told me he was allowed in the room but he would need to prep so he could enter the sterile environment but I needed him now, I needed to hear his reassuring words because he'd know exactly what to say in this situation. I didn’t know tears were falling down my face until one of the lovely nurses wiped them and stayed by my side to keep me company. It wasn't the same as having Jude there but it definitely made me feel a little better. 

By the time Jude made it into the room they had already started the surgery but he stayed calm and took the place of the nurse next to me. Just having him next to me made me feel a lot better, his hands held onto mine and he told me that everything would be ok and as much as he doesn't know that I believed him. His presence helped me forget about the fact that there was a team of doctors cutting me open and taking my babies out which is distressing but his calmness kept me calm too. 

It didn't take long for them to get baby A out which was confirmed as our little boy who they took away to do tests on and make sure he was ok. I expected Jude to go and be with our baby boy but he stayed by my side while the doctors pulled out baby B our little girl. I really thought Jude would leave then as both of our babies will be together getting a load of tests done which will be scary for them but again he didn't. He stayed by my side as the doctors stitched me up and gave me the medicine to reverse what they given me earlier to numb me from the waist down. Only once I was ok and they were sending me back to my room did he ask me if I'd be ok for him to leave and check on our babies so I told him to go and I'd be fine. 

I was exhausted from the whole ordeal I've been through today and I must've fallen asleep when they took me back to my room as when I woke up Jude was back in the room and he had both our babies on his chest. They both looked so tiny but they were perfect. I'm not sure if it was the hormones that were still raging through my body or what but just looking at my little family made me cry. 

"Hey you're awake" Jude said 

"And you're crying what's wrong love?" He asked

"Nothing is wrong it's just seeing you with them I can't believe they are ours they are just so perfect" I said 

"They are and you did so well I can’t imagine how scary that was” he said 

“I couldn’t have done it without you there I don’t know how you were so calm” I said 

“I was freaking out on the inside but I knew you needed me to be calm so I just thought about that and made sure I was there for you” he said 

“Thank you I don’t know what I would’ve done if I you’d got on that plane”I said 

“Let’s not think about that I’m just happy to be here for this moment” he said 

Jude leant over and give me a kiss. He then handed me my babies and I got to hold them for the first time which was so emotional but my heart felt to full. As much as nothing has gone exactly to plan none of that matters now that I have my babies in my arms and Jude by my side, my family is complete and I couldn’t be happier. 

[shaunamilfman]

Jackie Taylor with an s/o that plays video games

pre-crash headcanons

Jackie Taylor is for sure a hater of any hobby you have. Why would you want to have a hobby when you could just watch her being pretty?? 

she’d definitely approach this with the intent of getting you to stop playing and pay attention to her at first. she’s laying all over you absolutely astonished that you’re still playing video games while she’s there. You seriously have a pretty girl in your lap and still want to play minecraft?

She’s realizing the error of this plan as you assume she’s interested and start explaining what’s going on in your game. It wasn’t her intention, but she figures at least this way you’re still paying her attention. She’ll get what she can get.

Jackie would end up getting really interested in the story line and would get upset with you if you even thought about playing it without her. she asks you so many dumb questions about game mechanics and makes you go through every single dialog option that it takes you like 40 hours to finish a 20 hour game

Jackie would get really into competitive games on your behalf. like she'd sitting there cheering you on like she's watching a fucking soccer game. Jackie buys you headphones with a mic so she can start shit talking people you play against. she gets really into the spirit of the competition man. 

Jackie talking about you embarrassing her after she shit talked everyone and you died like 3 minutes in lmao. all “how could you do this to me 😔” and shit. i just know Jackie Taylor would be an absolute menace on a mic regardless of if you had the skill to back it up

it's even funnier because she'd be so so bad at it herself. Jackie blows herself up with her own grenade like every time because she hits the wrong button. pouts and gives up after one round. isn't she dreamy?? 🥰🥰

Jackie trying to get into playing games but it's just her running around frolicking in the tall grass and handing you the controller whenever she had to fight someone

speaking of which I just know she went out and bought the pink controller. your black controller was not cute enough for her 

Jackie looks up guides for you whenever you get stuck on something. you think it's sweet but she just gets bored easily

Playing Minecraft with Jackie but all she does is build the house and accidently screw you over. Jackie moves the bed while your gone and completely fucks your spawn point up. Jackie's just like “i wanted to put carpet there 😔” Jackie also dies from falling off the house at some point and is at spawn getting farmed by mobs till you come get her. 

Jackie has you off in the mines for days because she wants an iron block accent wall. she only ever wants the expensive blocks I just know it. she's building your house out of the wood block instead of the planks, and she'll be damned if she's gathering those resources herself

Jackie taking your diamond armor to wear while she builds the house because “it's prettier than iron 🥰🥰.”

You come back from a long day of mining and Jackie wants to show you the heart shaped leaves on the trees that took her an hour to do. 

Jackie's house gets blown up by a creeper and she's beside herself over it I just know it

you make the mistake of showing Jackie the Sims because you think she might like it. she's obsessed immediately. 

she plays it on her regular laptop and it sounds like an airplane taking off 

Jackie has a painstakingly perfect recreation of your place with you guys in it, and she will make this your problem

sim you cheats on sim Jackie and she won't speak to you for days. she texts you a picture of the notification like “wowwwwwww. okay.” it does not matter to her that it was a video game lmaoo

catching Jackie recreating a girl who flirted with you so she can lock her in the pool to drown

Jackie picking your outfit out one day and you're just staring at her suspiciously

"what? 😁" / "these kind of look like the outfits you put us in your game" / "pffff. whattttt?”

you'll fall asleep to Jackie playing it and wake up and she's still there. it gets so bad you and Shauna have to stage an intervention. 

Jackie gets pissed whenever your character can marry/date another character. She found out you married Haley in Stardew Valley and still glares at you whenever she sees a coconut. “why don't you go tell your WIFE 🙄.” my petty queen. 

trying to get Jackie to play a resident evil game but she cries like ten minutes in because she's so stressed/scared from the background noises. three creek floor noises and she's gone. hasn't even gotten in the house yet 

Jackie grows to really love the fact that you have a hobby she can also enjoy/participate in with you. Jackie loves to spend all her time and energy with you, even if you aren't giving her your full attention like she'd prefer. 

Jackie makes you pick all the nice dialog lines because she'll get upset if your character is mean. She has such strong opinions about dialog choices that she'll argue with you for like ten minutes over why you should pick a certain choice even though it has absolutely no impact on the story

Jackie definitely cheats at choice games and knows all the possible consequences for every single choice. you go to steal a candy bar or something and she's like “NOOO!”

slightly unrelated but Jackie would totally pick bae>bay without hesitation. Everyone in the town is dead? small price to pay for lesbians

going feral over the idea Jackie Taylor sitting across your lap scrolling on Pinterest while you have your arms around her holding the controller as you play

[neonnoir-ao3]

Caine and Pomni falling in love in the Circus and making it out together only for Caine to realize how warped all their personalities were compared to who they actually are in reality, but especially Pomni’s.

Okay literal train-of-thought word salad from here on out, prepare yourselves accordingly.

• Like he knows Pomni as an anxious little jester but they love each other and she’s cute and funny and affectionate and all that fun stuff. But once they’re in reality he follows her like a lost puppy because he has no idea how this place works and gets to see how she actually lives.

• Pomni is basically an accidental femcel when it comes to vibes. A complete girlfailure, if you will. (socially isolated, chronically single brunette with glasses, you get the idea)

• A “nice relaxing night for her” is playing a random YouTube video essay that’s like three hours long while lounging on the couch and not wearing pants, eating an entire bag of chips and probably hitting her bong. She gave up on dating in college due to failure after failure so she’s accepted that she’s gonna die alone… or rather she says she has. (She read that “I’m not doing to be loved in this lifetime, am I?” quote in a TikTok slideshow and proceeded to down an entire bottle of wine that night while sobbing)

• She wanted to get a cat to ease the loneliness, but she doesn’t feel good enough— a cat deserves more than just a shitty apartment with a wreck of an owner in their mid-20s.

• He goes back to her apartment— it’s dingy and shitty but it’s the closest place to the office that she can afford. Her half of her pantry is ramen she bought in bulk. She’s medicated to high heaven and her kitchen counters look like a pharmacy.

• Pomni is either so fucking embarrassed when Caine sees how her life is in reality or the Human Depression™ in her Human Body™ has already set back in by the time they get there and she’s just miserably accepting of it. There is no in-between.

• She showers for the first time since The Incident (she didn’t need to bathe in the DC, her clothes were literally attached to her body there/hygiene was a total nonissue in that world) and she just breaks down and spends a good 30-40 minutes taking a scalding hot shower (as all the depressed girlies do) while sobbing her heart out. It’s cathartic as fuck to be able to lose her shit for once without the threat of abstraction, but it also hurts so fucking badly at the exact same time.

• Something about mental illness in real humans versus their digital avatars really messes with Caine. At the very least he could create a zany adventure to get their mind off of things, but then there’s some days where Pomni just stays in bed all day and doesn’t say a word. This world is so harsh and dull and colorless in comparison to the world he was made for, and there are fleeting moments where he wonders if it would’ve been better if they had both stayed there.

[lesbianreginageorgeisreal]

Ask away (I'm bored)

1: Name

2: Age

3: 3 Fears

4: 3 things I love

5: 4 turns on

6: 4 turns off

7: My best friend

8: Sexual orientation

9: My best first date

10: How tall am I

11: What do I miss

12: What time were I born

13: Favorite color

14: Do I have a crush

15: Favorite quote

16: Favorite place

17: Favorite food

18: Do I use sarcasm

19: What am I listening to right now

20: First thing I notice in new person

21: Shoe size

22: Eye color

23: Hair color

24: Favorite style of clothing

25: Ever done a prank call?

27: Meaning behind my URL

28: Favorite movie

29: Favorite song

30: Favorite band

31: How I feel right now

32: Someone I love

33: My current relationship status

34: My relationship with my parents

35: Favorite holiday

36: Tattoos and piercing i have

37: Tattoos and piercing i want

38: The reason I joined Tumblr

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?

42: When did I last hold hands?

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?

44: Have I shaved your legs in the past three days?

45: Where am I right now?

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?

49: Am I excited for anything?

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?

51: How often do I wear a fake smile?

52: When was the last time I hugged someone?

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?

55: What is something I disliked about today?

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

57: What do I think about most?

58: What’s my strangest talent?

59: Do I have any strange phobias?

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

61: What was the last lie I told?

62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

64: Do I believe in magic?

65: Do I believe in luck?

66: What's the weather like right now?

67: What was the last book I've read?

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?

69: Do I have any nicknames?

70: What was the worst injury I've ever had?

71: Do I spend money or save it?

72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue?

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me?

74: Favorite animal?

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?

78: How can you win my heart?

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?

80: What is my favorite word?

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?

83: Do I have any relatives in jail?

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

86: What is my current desktop picture?

87: Had sex?

88: Bought condoms?

89: Gotten pregnant?

90: Failed a class?

91: Kissed a boy?

92: Kissed a girl?

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?

94: Had job?

95: Left the house without my wallet?

96: Bullied someone on the internet?

97: Had sex in public?

98: Played on a sports team?

99: Smoked weed?

100: Did drugs?

101: Smoked cigarettes?

102: Drank alcohol?

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?

104: Been overweight?

105: Been underweight?

106: Been to a wedding?

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?

109: Been outside my home country?

110: Gotten my heart broken?

111: Been to a professional sports game?

112: Broken a bone?

113: Cut myself?

114: Been to prom?

115: Been in airplane?

116: Fly by helicopter?

117: What concerts have I been to?

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?

119: Learned another language?

120: Wore make up?

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18?

122: Had oral sex?

123: Dyed my hair?

124: Voted in a presidential election?

125: Rode in an ambulance?

126: Had a surgery?

127: Met someone famous?

128: Stalked someone on a social network?

129: Peed outside?

130: Been fishing?

131: Helped with charity?

132: Been rejected by a crush?

133: Broken a mirror?

134: What do I want for birthday?

[jooyeonsvape]

Video Calls

jungsu smut

w/c: 1.7k

warnings: smut, mutual masturbation, dirty talking, 18+ please

summary: you are away with family and missed your boyfriend jungsu, he sees you in his hoodie and it makes him hungry for you.

a/n: hope you enjoy! please like and follow, i’m currently only writing for xdinary heroes but will start writing for txt, svt, and bts soon!! 🫶 if you want to see something specific, please feel free to message!

the time is 12:40 a.m and your boyfriend, jungsu, was supposed to be on your video call at 12:20.

you sit anxiously at your desk, scrolling through twitter when you suddenly see a fan edit of him with his hair in bunny ears on episode 10 of the first rock the world.

you giggle slightly at him and his band members silliness, tracing the bunny ears with your finger on the laptop screen. you save it to your photo album while you wait for him and then go through more fan edits, continuing to laugh at the boys.

you didn't want to touch him through a screen anymore, you wanted to feel him infront of you. jungsu is an hour away in seoul while you were visiting family for a wedding and planned on staying a week. it was currently day 3 and you were already having withdrawls from your baby jungsu, he was so busy with work you barely even talk on the phone anymore.

the familiar ring of your laptop went off and a bright smile spreads across your face, instantly hitting answer. the smile grew even brighter when you see the man you truly love, waving at the camera and blowing kisses. "sorry i'm late, the boys and i were writing a new song and i was in charge of fitting the piano in there." jungsu sighs, you could tell he was tired but he wouldn't trade his job for anything.

"it's fine my darling, you're more than worth the wait." his cheeks turn red at your statement and suddenly gunil comes into frame, holding a video game controller. "thanks for letting me borrow this, i'll take my leave now. oh and [Y/N], that line was lame." he chuckles, running out when jungsu started slapping his butt.

"you know it's only courteous to tell me when others are around." you slam your face in your hands from embarrassment and you just hear jungsu laughing. "its okay baby, he's just jealous, that line was cute, it was almost as cute as your butt." he tried to make you feel better but it made your face more red when he started talking about your butt.

trying to move on from the embarrassment you clear your throat, "how is the new song coming?" you ask and jungsu shrugs softly, "i think it's good enough to be a title song, it makes me think of our relationship." he honestly says and the blush comes back on your face. "oh? is it about a sexy girl that casted a spell on you?" junsgu just laughs and shakes his head, "you didn't need to cast a spell to get me, you're perfect."

"stop making me blush so much, i miss you my bear." you pout and rest your chin on your arms when you think about him. "oh, i bought something today, want to see it?" you chirp, lifting your head back up and not even waiting for an answer, run to your bed. "it's a stuffed animal that reminds me of you."

it was a cute cat stuffed animal that was dressed up as a bat. "it has your cheeks and eyes." you giggle, playing with it for him while he just watches with love written all over his face.

"baby?" jungsu asks when you throw it back on the bed, then sitting back at the desk. "yes?" he leans closer to the camera so he could get a better look at what you were wearing. "is that my favorite hoodie? i've been looking everywhere for it!! you are so sneaky."

you slowly look down at his baggy hoodie on your body with a guilty smile. "about that.... it was the last one you wore and it smells like you. you're just lucky i didn't take your cologne." you huff, crossing your arms and he laughs at your stubbornness. "okay okay, it's only a week." he surrenders.

there was a moment of silence while you were just staring at each other lovingly, then he finally speaks. "can you model that for me? i love my hoodies on you." he mumbles awkwardly, playing with something random on his table.

you loved that even after 2 years together jungsu still gets shy around to you, it showed that you made him feel nervous and like a school crush."do you want to see what i'm wearing underneath?" you ask to make him more awkward, loving the smile he gave.

you already knew the answer so you stand up from the chair, posing in different positions for him, the hoodie went to your mid-thigh and you slowly lift one side up, showing a pair of light blue lingerie you bought while on the trip. "beautiful," jungsu whispers, analyzing every inch of your body when you do a 360 degree turn.

"do you want this PG-13, rated R, or TVMA?" you ask with a giggle and he pretends to think, "TVMA." jungsu answered confidently, which gave you the green light to slide the hoodie off all the way.

the both of you usually have sex every night, unless he gets home when you're already sleeping, so 3 days is like an eternity for you.

"okay i took a piece of clothing off, your turn." you smirk to your boyfriend who was currently staring at you as if it was the first time he's seen you in lingerie. "i'll take my shirt and sweats off so we're both in our underwear." he was even a sweetie pie during sexy times.

jungsu stood from the chair, taking off his shirt that showed his fit body and then his sweats until he was just in his tight boxers. even on camera you can see the buldge through his underwear, making you squeeze your thighs for some pressure on your beating clit.

he notices your thighs and smirks softly, "i love when you do that infront of me, it's so hot [Y/N]." his deeper than normal voice made you whimper, squeezing harder.

jungsu sits back on the chair and points the camera to his bottom half, only his face cut off from view. you take your laptop to your bed so he could have a better view and position the camera like his.

"man i miss you [Y/N], i haven't felt relief since the day before you left." he mumbles and slowly plays with his outline, watching it grow even more.

"i've been masturbating to the videos we took," you admit with a laugh, spreading your legs for him. "why didn't you tell me? we could've done this days ago. it's kinda a fantasy of mine to masturbate with you." jungsu smirks, lifting his hips so he could slide off his boxers.

when he does it your eyes are glued to how his cock flops out, making your hand instantly go to your pussy. "me too baby, watching you stroke yourself turns me on." you hum out, rubbing circles around your clit through your panties before taking them off.

jungsu watches intensely while giving his dick slow strokes then spits on his hand, going faster after. "play with your boobs for me." he orders and you oblige, taking off your bra leaving you naked.

your hands make their way to your boobs, teasing jungsu by just rubbing circles around your nipples. he has an obsession with them, any chance he gets he's squeezing or sucking on them. "properly [Y/N], don't you want me to cum?" he sighs, making you laugh at his neediness.

"yes sir." it was the first time you called him that name before and you were wondering if he liked it, but by his strokes getting faster you assume yes.

both of your hands grab ahold of your boobs and you squeeze hard, letting out a whimper which makes jungu's hips thrust up. "i wish i could moan louder for you." you mumble, taking one of your hands off your boob and gliding a finger along your folds.

"it's okay baby girl, i like your needy whimpers more." jungsu admits, never losing speed unless he needs to spit on his hand.

you throw your head back once a finger enters your wetness, pumping fast to match jungsu, and when the whimpers weren't enough you slap a hand over your mouth. "are imagining those are my fingers baby? i'm imagining this is your hand jerking me off."

you couldn't take it anymore and cum at his dirty talking, he usually wasn't like this so it turned you on even more. when you hit your peak your free hand gripped the sheets and it left you with your mouth hung wide open.

"i'm going to add 2 more fingers so it feels like you're inside me." you whisper once you were ready to cum again. jungsu sits up and thrusts in his hand the way he fucks you, moaning loud for you.

with the fingers inside of you, rubbing your clit, and jungsu's moans you were about to cum again. by the strain on his neck and breathy moans coming from him you could tell he was close too. "cum for me baby, i want to see it on your chest." you mumble, rolling your eyes in the back of your head to stop from screaming at the pleasure.

"i'm almost there [Y/N], you're so sexy. i love watching you fuck your own pussy." jungsu moans out, his words driving you over the edge, and you cumming for a second time. you watch intently as he sits back down, cumming on his stomach, the soft whimpers following his orgasm from being sensitive made you want to just drive home now.

he grabs his boxers and wipes his stomach, making an awkward face. "its okay baby, when i'm back home you won't have to wipe it off, i'll lick it up." you giggle and jungsu ticks his tongue, his eyes smiling for him. "don't get me going again, i have an early schedule tomorrow." he laughs and it made your lips pout. "does that mean you have to go?" "yes, i need to shower, but don't worry, we'll do this again tomorrow angel. i love you."

"i love you more jungsu."

[meatball-headache]

This is Meatball's Warframe Post.

As usual, it was @chiclet-go-boom who got me to play. Right around when Endwalker was on the horizon, Warframe also released a new trailer, and Chic gibbered like three rabid squirrels to rush off and drool over it. It seemed uncharacteristic, since Warframe was some kind of parkour PVP game, right?

It was, in fact, not a PVP game, and as Chiclet soon explained, had lore as deep and intricate as any Final Fantasy or Dark Souls. To be a good friend, I watched the new trailer, too—of course, nothing meant anything to me, but the visuals were cool and had quite a lot of mystique, so it was intriguing. So, I downloaded the game, since it's free and all—and that was that for now. Endwalker was coming!

...and so Endwalker went. Some months later, in a lull between patches, the conversation returned to Warframe. I think it came to mind and I was mooded to crack it open and give it a try. What I found was... profoundly confusing. It opens with a cutscene, and I'm thinking: this game is years old. Is this like Destiny, I'm supposed to know the story so far, I'm supposed to be familiar with these characters? It was all very confusing.

The opening cutscenes celebrate the Tenno, and give you three Warframes to pick from: Excalibur, Mag, and Volt. My impression at the time was that these spirits, the "Tenno," were something newly added to the game? Were these the three new Warframes or something? Or, are they starting me at the beginning of the years-long update cycle? No time to be confused, though, I had to pick a Warframe. I wanted to be the cute girl, Mag, but it said Excalibur was the best choice for beginners, even though he looked weird, so I went with him.

I have never played a game that moves like this. It's so... fast. But it's not jagged or janky or spastic, it's very smooth. It's hard to aim, though, since I was playing on PS4, and I suck at a) shooting games, and b) aiming with a controller. All was going well until, early in the tutorial, it teaches you how to "bullet jump." Oh, I thought: this is so weird and awkward. Bullet jumps? Wall latches? Ugh. I'll just play this game normal and not do that very much.

I didn't really like Excalibur; he looks weird. Aesthetics are important! I only played for an hour or two that first night, but I was disappointed with Excalibur... I wanted to start over, but it doesn't seem like you can reset your account. I was frustrated... but, then I learned that Chiclet plays on PC. Obviously, I mean, c'mon. Could my computer even run the game? It was a years-old laptop that I only originally bought to have Youtubes on the side while I played FFXIV on PS4. But, turns out it could run FFXIV... maybe I'll try Warframe? Start fresh, and be Mag this time—even if she's too hard for a noob?

So, I started over. I installed it on my PC and created a new account and started with Mag this time, and boy, things were different—by about 40 fps. My computer, it turned out, could run Warframe... in slideshow mode. I turned down the graphics, and I was still getting around 20-30 fps. Well... good enough, I guess, if it means I can play with Chic.

I don't know how long that first session lasted. A day or two, maybe a weekend, something like that. The game was very much to my liking in this regard: you just play it. It's got story and lore, sure, but pretty much you start the game, you go through a "Press X to jump" mission, and then you're on your own! In this regard, it's a Soulslike—you do what you want because you want to, not because the game tells you to. You go over there because you can see it and you want to know what's there, and when you get there, things happen; cf. the classic Final Fantasy setup, where you can't go over there, not until the story tells you to go there.

I didn't understand mods or ranks or 90% of the things in my menu. It was a very simple game where you just pop in, run some quick missions, shoot a bunch of guys and grind for loot. It scratched a lot of itches—although performance wasn't ideal, but whatever, I'd manage gladly.

So, I played for a couple days, and then I got to the first big turning point: Cetus. All of a sudden, I was in a town? With other players? And what players they were! My little, unadorned Mag looked positively naked next to these Warframes in extravagant costumes, with animations, flowing capes, glowing wings, all sorts of things. Of course, I didn't know a single one of these 'frames, could not possibly comprehend how any of these things were acquired—pay to win, I assumed. I could only wonder how long it'd be until I got cool stuff like that.

Now, Cetus, if you know Warframe, you know it's different. It's not just a normal mission, it's a town, like I said, connected to an open world region, the Plains of Eidolon. Naturally, I assumed this was my next mission, and figured out how to take on bounties from Konzu. And these... were a whole lot harder than normal missions! It said it was my level, but levels apparently mean something else out here, because these missions kicked my ass. I remember doing a side quest to unlock Gara's blueprint. Excited to get my first new Warframe, I ran to the foundry to start making it, and got confused when it seemed to need more Gara blueprints to make it. Eventually, I realized the bounties Konzu offered had a chance to drop these component blueprints... but, some of the bounties were way beyond my level. Even the ones that weren't were already too hard. My hopes of getting a new Warframe seemed to wither.

I think I got to Mars, and then stopped playing for a bit. I'm not sure, exactly. I spent a nice weekend or so trying out the game, it wasn't bad, the grind seemed very steep, and then it was time to move on.

Months passed.

Somehow, I was inspired to play again—maybe Chiclet gushing about another trailer, maybe seeing the icon on my desktop for months eventually wore me down, but I picked it up again. I was on Mars, which was much harder than Earth, and still had no clue what I was doing, but I plugged ahead anyway, clearing nodes on the map. I still had only Mag, with no cool outfits, no new weapons or anything fun like that. Well, eventually something would drop, right...?

Hm—if I remember correctly, and it's all kind of fuzzy, you can't go from Earth to Mars at first. You have to clear Venus and Mercury, right. So, no, I wasn't on Mars yet. I was on Venus, which of course means—

Fortuna.

I was prepared. I had seen the music video on Youtube, I'd already heard the song. In fact, I'd heard the song long before I tried the game, long before I met Chiclet, a real long time ago. It was good, I liked it—and part of what kept me going was wondering where this amazing song would crop up. As I played the game, it seemed more and more out of place. But then, all at once, it happened. Imagine my surprise when I learned that, no, that wasn't a cinematic music video just to promote the game, that was the cutscene in the actual game!

It was transformative. It was profound. Yes, I teared up, of course I did! And then the story in Fortuna has you helping the workers unionize to defeat a capitalist? Sign me the fuck up! So I was motivated to play, to be part of this world, to help them out. The only thing is—the mission turned out to be incredibly hard. I died again and again. It wasn't until I went into the arsenal and added mods to my Warframe and my weapons that I was finally able to win, and even then, only barely. The game was starting to get hard! Did I have what it takes to get harder?

Open world missions on Orb Vallis were much harder than the Plains of Eidolon, but by now I'd also learned that these were optional. It was more reputation quests, more vendors... This game was getting really complicated. All I was doing was clearing the map, and there was so much to this game... Not only that, but around here I decidedly to bravely try to do public missions, though I was afraid I'd hold everyone back... this turned out to not be an issue. Everyone was super strong, super competent, and they blazed through missions with ease, with or without my presence. Thanks for the carry, you thousands of online strangers!

But, by doing public missions, I saw the vast gulf between Warframe's and FFXIV's philosophies. FFXIV has rigid requirements for every duty, fixed party sizes, role requirement, level sync, all that jazz—so that everyone has the same experience every time. Warframe just lets you do whatever. You might do this mission and have an MR30 Saryn Prime nuke the map from the start and be done in seconds; you might have a MR2 Excalibur still leveling the starting gear and trying to learn how to double-jump.

Never was this more evident than what I choose to remember was my first time playing a public mission. It was a defense mission on Earth. I'd done it before solo, and it took a long time and it was very difficult, since I had to machine-gun each enemy individually, being generally clueless as I was. After that, I decided to try a public mission. I can't get lost and be too slow for everyone else, since it's defense, and it might help to have more, well, help. I got a full group, and, I have no earthly idea what Warframes they might have been, but I remember one of them clearly: as soon as the mission started, they all cast a bunch of spells and the entire map started exploding. Then this one guy jumped on top of the defense objective, whipped out a guitar, and just stood there playing music the whole time while all the enemies exploded before I ever even saw them.

This is what lies ahead of you, Meatball, I thought. This is what you might achieve someday.

So, back on Venus, I proceeded to the end of the map, and this time—there was a boss fight! The Jackal. Needless to say, I died and failed the mission. I didn't understand what the hell I was supposed to do. Perhaps this is where I finally went on public, to get carried a little by experts? Whether it was my first public exposure or not, it worked—some pro players annihilated the Jackal before I could understand what was going on. This paved the way to Mercury, and culminated in another boss fight—and the end of the road. But, with Mercury out of the way, I could go back to Earth and travel to Mars.

In order to unlock a new planet, you have to defeat the boss in the junction, a mirror match against another Warframe. The first few were easy, but Mars I think was spicier. For the sake of the narrative, let's say I couldn't do it for now. I slunk back to my ship in defeat, and went to tinker with my mods and foundry and stuff like that. Have I gotten any new weapons or anything? No, I don't think so, I don't have any weapons or Warf—what's this!?

"Rhino chassis." A Warframe component blueprint. Not Gara, which was out of reach, too high level—where did this come from? Tooltips soon revealed it: it dropped from the Jackal. Bosses drop Warframes! My eyes lit up, my heart raced. I'm going to get my first new Warframe. I raced back to Venus to tackle the Jackal again, and farmed that bastard to oblivion, again and again until I had all the Rhino parts. Finally, finally, it was time—

—to wait. Twelve hours for the component, then three days for the thing itself. Okay, that's fine. I could use a break. I'll come back next weekend and be Rhino.

Now, I did exaggerate, dire reader. I had some new weapons ready when Rhino came out of the foundry: the Boltor machine gun, the Frigor giant hammer, and some secondary weapons but who cares. At this point, I didn't even realize that's how you grind MR. But everything was exciting and new—and stronger. I had to level them up, and with Rhino's shield ability, now I was tough enough to handle the junction and get to Mars and beyond!

At some point, I got to Deimos. Unlike other planets, this time you start in an open world, and work your way to the town. There was some story missions here, but I don't remember the main beats, only that in the end you get to test-drive a Necramech. This game keeps adding new things—first you had normal missions, then open world, then Archwing, now Necramechs... I remember the story mission being monstrously difficult again, so I bailed on Deimos for now.

There was something else I finally had access to. Somehow, I had gotten to MR5, and could fight the boss on Earth. It irked me that I couldn't finish off Earth before moving on, but, I guess they didn't want you to start with finished planets until you'd done a little story and unlocked some new systems.

This boss... is where this play session ended. It was so incredibly difficult and incredibly frustrating. He's a tiny flying drone, only vulnerable for brief windows when his face is exposed, and he's impossible to hit. I was playing solo, so my suckitude doesn't waste anyone's time, which just made this boss nearly impossible. I kept dying, I ran out of ammo constantly. It was the most frustrating experience in the game by far—but, bosses have new Warframes. Except Mercury, for some reason. And Mar's boss just dropped Excalibur, who I'd already tried. Earth's boss had a new one, something called Hydroid, which was the dorkiest name in the world, but oh well.

To make a long story short, I farmed this boss for all the Hydroid parts, which infuriated me beyond belief. I threw him into the foundry, and it was time for a very big deal: Jupiter. Now, when I'd first started playing, I joked with Chiclet, something, "Can I do what I want? Can I just go to Jupiter and deal with high-level enemies and hilariously get my ass kicked?" She gave me kind of a wishy-washy answer, something along the lines of sort of, but not really, but you wouldn't want to anyway. I had, in fact, found a couple of blueprints that needed components from Jupiter. I was very excited when I saw I could finally get these things. So, while Hydoird cooked, I tried to go to Jupiter.

And tried.

And tried.

And tried.

But... I just couldn't beat the junction boss, at all. She had too much health, and if I got close, she's instantly melee me to death, even through Rhino's mighty shield. You have to do these solo, so no getting carried, and there's no map or any other enemies, so I can't go collect energy before the fight. I had basically one ability, and that had to get me through. Try as I might, I could not win—so I stopped playing.

Months passed again.

I picked up the game again around April 2023. Pretty soon, I remembered why I stopped—this damn Valkyr Specter. But, I had some other stuff to do now. I had a new Warframe, Hydroid, to level up, and a new gun, the Boar, to try out. I certainly didn't understand how to play Hydroid at first, but I got him to 30, and then... I guess I'll try Valkyr again. I'd have to do it on Rhino, because he has that shield. Would the Boar be strong enough to beat her?

No.

Okay, now I'm getting pissed. I just can't beat her, no matter what I do. I was, remember, still pretty dumb, probably less than a hundred hours in the game—I'm a slow boil, what do you want :p—so fusing mods, damage types, or anything other that clicking Automod was beyond me. But, I said, fuck it, if Rhino can't beat her, I'll try Hyrdoid. I ran in with him, with the Boar shotgun and Amphis staff, and—died. Take two, I ran in, used my 1 ability, barrage of water bombs, but that fell off her like so much rain. Died. Take three, I used my 2 ability, the tidal wave dash... all that did was get me into melee faster so she could one-shot me sooner. Died. Fine! Take four! I used my 4 ability, the tentacles—well, that was no good, she was a boss, so they couldn't grab her, and once again I died. Well, I haven't tried the 3 ability, the puddle? A roving dot? It doesn't sound like it does much damage, but—

Dire reader. I turned into a puddle, and Valkyr ran to me, and—sploosh. She fell into the puddle. She was gone. She vanished. The only thing on the screen was a puddle, and damage numbers popping out of it. There's no way this works, I said. There's no way this lasts long enough to kill her. There's no way this does enough damage.

Tick. Tick. Tick. Tiny damage numbers poppped out of my self, and I watched first Valkyr's shield slowly faded, and then her health began to dwindle—until, just before I ran out of energy, her health bar fell down to zero—Mission Complete.

I'm sitting there slack-jawed, astonished. There's no way this ridiculous puddle move just completely annihilated this invincible boss. But, it did. It happened. I made it to Jupiter. All thanks to this absolute boi, Hydroid—my new main. With the power of Hydroid's puddle, I ran through the star system like a beast. Jupiter fell and I moved on to Europa; Europa was defeated and I went to Saturn; Saturn was finished and I went to Uranus.

"Operator, a new quest is available," said the Lotus. And I had a funny thing on top of my screen that just said "NATAH."

Hm! I wonder what that is. Oh well. And I returned to my delightful grind. Some of these planets had bosses, so I had to farm for new Warframes. I had finally figured out how to buy blueprints from the market, so I was making new weapons. All this stuff had to get leveled up, so I went back and ran missions, defense missions—I figured out how to do Void Relics (sort of), and also tried to finally do some bounties—Earth only, Venus and Deimos were still wicked hard. And whenever I got back to my ship after a successful mission—

"NATAH." Hm! What a meaningless word. Sounds like a main quest. No thanks! Why do MSQ when I could grind, explore, and waste time?

So another hundred hours passed. I was starting to get good at the game! I leveled up my weapons and my Warframes and finally figured out how to fuse mods, so I crammed all my weapons full of as much damage as I could. Orokin Catalysts and Forma were still years away from my mind, though—but, it seemed to me that I was as strong as I could possibly get. I thought about the guitar guy, blowing up the entire map constantly without even moving—how can I get that strong? I thought about the K-drive, the Archwings, the Necramechs—all the weird stuff this game has invented. Maybe there's more weird things later? Maybe I have to... do story to unlock things?

It was finally time. I had done as much as I could, but it was finally time to do the MSQ. So, I took up this new quest, NATAH. It was like the other quests—you do normal missions while the NPCs talk over you. It was kind of interesting, because it got into the Lotus's story a little bit. Neat! But, unlike other main quests or side quests, this didn't give me a new orbiter segment to unlock some new machines to let me do something different. This didn't even give me a new Warframe blueprint! But, it unlocked another main quest. Ah, so this is how it's gonna be? But one MSQ at a time. Let's let it digest a bit. So, maybe tomorrow I'll do this next quest...

The Second Dream.

Dear reader. Dire reader. Dour reader. Nothing could have prepared me for the Second Dream—and this was the best possible experience I could've had. Legions of fans telling me "Just wait till the Second Dream!" would've tipped me off that something big is going to happen, and my whole attitude would've been different. My expectations would've been high, and perhaps even the profound experience that it was wouldn't've been enough. I assure you, I'm getting the chills writing about it, just thinking about it.

The Second Dream was like nothing else in the game. The missions started normally—well, not really. It started with a cutscene. Had the game ever had cutscenes before? Other than Fortuna, that is. After the intro, you do normal missions with voice-overs, like before. It has to do with... things I don't understand. Did I forget the story? Is it supposed to be mysterious? Lotus talks about her father, there's a Sentient, there's a Stalker—we proceed with the mission, and then things really come unzipped.

From the beginning of the game, I noticed something wrong with the star chart: where's the Moon? Well, not every body in the solar system is represented; Europa's its own world, but Io, Callisto, and Ganymede are just individual missions on Jupiter. Ceres and Eris are their own worlds, but not Makemake or Haumea. But, it turns out I was right to wonder, because in this quest, we're teleported to somewhere we've never seen before: the Moon. It turns out there's a lot of lore surrounding the Moon, something special is there, and through the plot, the Moon is added to the star chart—a new world to explore, a new tileset to play in!

But of course, that's not all, because once we venture into the Moon, we find something very special: the Reservoir, the power source of the Tenno, the spirits that control the Warframes. Right from the game's very first opening cutscene, we saw the still Warframes, silent until the spirit of the Tenno entered them. We, the player, are the Tenno, controlling the Warframes. That's why, when you select the Warframe, you're not "putting it on" like armor, so much as you're activating it, and controlling it from afar—it's a little bit meta, the way Ordis always addressed you, the player, as "Operator," not talking to the Warframe itself. Lotus would say things like "Your Warframe is low on power," not "You're low on power."

There's another cutscene. Deep in the Moon, we find the Reservoir, a lotus-like set of pods. One comes out, and from it comes... a person. And—our Warframe drops dead immediately.

The cutscene continues. My nose is an inch from the screen. This is captivating. I've been playing this game for a couple hundred hours, and only now we're getting cinematic story like FFXIV started with. Imagine if you had been playing Tetris for years, and you finally get to the kill screen—and it zooms out and it was Karl Jobst playing at an arcade machine in a bar this whole time, and now you're watching him. Imagine if you've been playing Minecraft and terraformed a whole world, and then Steve turns to the camera and says, "Now... we can finally begin playing."

The human crawls over to the Warframe, touching it with a glow, and the Warframe picks them up. The Stalker appears—but hesitates. The voice of the Sentient threatens to attack, and then you're playing again. You're playing—but it's different. You're still carrying the person. Your Warframe powers are gone, you can't use your normal weapons, and these monsters are attacking you—what else can you do but point and click?

And it fires! The person you're carrying raises their hand a blast of energy annihilates these monsters. You carry them to safety as they blast hordes of these strange new enemies, and reach extraction—you're back to the safety of your ship.

Ah! Your beloved orbiter. You've been playing for hundreds of hours. You know this ship like the back of your syandana! Well, except for those weird closed doors at the back. Lotus instructs you to take the person to the back of the ship—oh, what? Wait—those closed doors? Really? We're going to find out what's in there? You go to the back of the ship, and then, all of the sudden, the doors open, as if they always could. Inside is a mysterious chamber containing one of those pods from before—and the Stalker! This time, he attacks you himself, and the person you're carrying fends him off with their power. You bring them to the chair, but he pushes you away, and you drop the person. The link is broken. You—your Warframe falls dead again, and the Stalker stabs it with his mysterious talking sword. The Stalker grabs the person, lifting them off the ground by the neck... and then you—your Warframe comes to life, grabs the sword—and breaks it. The Stalker is destroyed, and in a flash of light, both you and the person are out cold.

But then... someone picks up the person. It's not you, your Warframe is lying still. It's—the Lotus. On your actual ship. She puts the person in the pod, and then there's a pulse of light. The Warframe moves again.

"Now we fight on two fronts, my child. The war without—and the war within..."

This is mindblowing. This is beyond anything that's ever happened in this game. It's like if you were playing Pac-man and then suddenly after level 69, 2001: A Space Odyssey starts playing. This is a profound shift in everything about the game's... everything!

And then, and then, AND THEN...

...it dumps you into character creation.

This is what you are.

After hundreds of hours of gameplay, after traipsing across the entire solar system, after, for some people, years of playing—

Tutorial complete. Welcome to Warframe.

This is, bar absolutely none, the single greatest moment in any game I've ever played. You know FFXIV is my favorite game, but moment by moment, it doesn't have an absolute wham line like this. This is on the same level—beyond, really—but the only thing that comes close to holding a candle is the E ending of Nier Automata, Rom in Bloodborne, or the World of Ruin in FFVI. But even all of those were presaged by the game's tone, clearly building up to, and showing the potential for, a moment like this. FFVI had a map that teased the whole thing, in fact.

Character creation. Hundreds of hours into the game. Out of nowhere. Like I said, nothing could have prepared me for this—nothing should have, either. This completely blindsided me. It completely changed everything about the game. It turned everything I expected on its head. It's like fighting Psycho Mantis and finding out he knows you played Castlevania. It's like learning that the ghost is always behind you in PT. This is beyond "outside the box," this is in a whole different box factory.

And I'm just talking about the meta impact! To say nothing about the lore—when Ordis was talking to the "Operator," when Lotus was talking the Tenno, they weren't talking to you, the player—they were talking to your real character, the Tenno who was asleep in the Reservoir this whole time. This is who you are.

This is who you are. When I got to the character create screen—I didn't change a thing. I couldn't. I wasn't just creating a character at the beginning of the game like some lesser game like Elden Ring, I have been this person the whole time. I did fix her voice, though, I admit that much. She looks like... Nathan Explosion. I didn't mean to pick a girl this time, either, that's just... what it gave me. (Can you even change their body and give them boobs? Or you just differentiate gender by voice selection?) This is who you are. This is who you've always been.

After the bombshell, I was hooked. I played nonstop, day and night, week in, week out, for months on end. Warframe shot to the top of my charts; I wasn't playing Chiclet's game just to humor my pal, this was my game now. I was into it. And, of course, I finally started to learn. I got into Forma, Lenses, started cracking open Void Relics left and right, started churning out new weapons and Warframes, did Railjack missions, tried Lunaro (lol), syndicates, bounties, you name it—everything, of course, except main story. I had to let this soak. And, Warframe is a horizontal progression game, unlike FFXIV. Every step you take unlocks a thousand hours of grinding to get your Rivens and Kuvas and whatever—I'm getting ahead of myself, though.

I was completely addicted to Warframe, not even FFXIV could pull me back. The only thing that got me to stop grinding MR was Lies of P, and after that, the furor had died out, so it was a little while before I got back into Warframe some more. When I did, I finally did the next story quest, the War Within—this was also excellent, better cinematically, but the bombshell could not compete with the Second Dream. However, with the War Within, I had some big new grinds unlocked: Eidolon hunts (actually this came with the Second Dream, but I didn't figure it out until then) and Kuva weapons. Kuva weapons. I'd heard of these! I'd seen millions of players with these special weapons that go to rank forty—forty!—and have a million words in their names, someone comes in with "Dax Thrall Suva Kuva Zarr" and just blows up all of Helene in one shot. Here, surely, lay the path to greatness! And with Eidolons, I could get Arcanes, which I vaguely knew about from glancing at builds on websites, builds which had lots of mods and these Arcanes I knew jack shit about. After the New War The War Within [typo], it was time to shelve story for a while; I had a lot of grinding to do.

Let me rewind quite a bit. All the way to the beginning. When I first began playing, I did figure out that if you press Equip on your Warframe in the Arsenal, you could see a list of every Warframe. For a very long time, every time I browsed that list I saw some names I was sure I hadn't seen before. I had to start with Mag, of course, but... which Warframe was the one for me? Which one looked the coolest, had the best powers, the most interesting lore? I instantly discounted some ugly ones, like Hildryn, and some with stupid names, like Hydroid. We see how that turned out. As usual, I was looking for a cute girl... but these were all very strange, weird, alien robot monsters. Lavos—he was the last boss in Chrono Trigger, maybe go after him. Sevagoth, that's similar to Sephiroth, but he looks weird. Ember, Frost, Volt... I don't really go in for these "elemental" things unless it's a superlative element. So like, holy or dark, that'd be a cool theme. Speaking of themes—music! When you click each one, it takes you to a page where you can see their skills, read their lore, and it also plays their theme music. Or, some music anyway, there's some repeats, I guess it's just some generic music. Yeah, Garuda, Gauss, Gyre, these all have the same music, Harrow—

Rap. Tap. Tap.

Okay well this is different. An eerie, industrial grind, haunting, strange whispers—this is very interesting indeed! I read his lore—he's a void priest?! Okay, now that severely fucks. I read his moves—whoa. This guy's got all kinds of support buffs? Well, that's certainly a lot more interesting than "This attacks in a cone, this attacks in a line, this attacks in a circle." Okay. I'm sold. How do I unlock this guy? According to the thing ingame, you have to do the "Chains of Harrow" quest on Pluto or the Void or something. Okay, well, then I just have to plow ahead to the Void and I'll be able to get him! Oh, neat, it looks like Phobos has a shortcut to the Void!

...anyway, that didn't happen, obviously. This was still my first weekend. Once I started to learn how to get other stuff, I forgot about Harrow, but still had him in the back of my mind. And, a while later—around the Second Dream session—I had finally gotten the hang of Void Relics. I had tried to get them before, way at the beginning, because I saw "Octavia Prime" and "Nezha Prime," and I recognized them as Warframes—a couple I thought looked pretty cool, in fact. I had no idea Primes were a different version, I thought it meant... "This is the primary part to make it," or something. Of course, day one player, I couldn't get all the things I needed from mere Lith Relics, and the higher levels were beyond me. It wasn't until much later, when I had access to more stuff, that I began to realize—oh, hey. I might be able to get a Prime Warframe! Wouldn't that be cool.

I jumped into Void Relics until I had exhausted my supply, went to grind more, and crack them again. I got so many parts for so many things, but never everything for anything. I just kept aimlessly grinding, getting 3/4 of everything, but something always eluded me.

Dire reader, you know what Void Relics happened to be in the rotation at that time? Why, none other than Harrow Prime's. I noticed it, of course, and grabbed the blueprints when they were available. And it wasn't until after doing a lot of grinding that I sat down and said, okay, what exactly do I have? I went through my foundry to see what I had, what I was close to, what I might be able to finish off—and, surely enough, I had three pieces of Harrow. All I needed were the Harrow Prime Neuroptics, which were the rare thing from an Axi, I think. But, I had some Axis. We had a mission, and from then on, I was grinding with focus, farming Axi relics, upgrading them for the maximum chance at the rare, and cracking them—in full parties, of course, in case anyone else had one. And so it wasn't long before it happened: Harrow Prime Neuroptics. I had all the pieces I needed. I had all the materials, I had the Argon Crystals—I was going to have my first Prime Warframe! And it was going to be Harrow.

I love Harrow—though, he is admittedly hard to use well, and having one "press this button to blow up the room" ability would be nice... but he's stylish, he's cool, he's mine. I used him a lot once I got him—he's a Prime! He's better than anyone!—but he wasn't my last Prime frame by far. Soon came Nidus Prime, Garuda Prime, Wisp Prime, Baruuk Prime, and more, and more, and more... Now, he's just one of dozens in my stable—but I still remember how he was the first one that stood out to me. In fact, dear reader, I reordered things a little—I got Harrow before I did the Second Dream, and it was as Harrow that I did it. He's my Story Frame—although another one I've had my eye on for a while, Baruuk, is really making a run for the top spot. Baruuk, the "patient monk," always caught my eye, being at the top of the alphabet as he is, so I'd always be starting at him when I was picking which frame to play today. I really enjoy his "neutral" theme, the commonality in his 1-3 abilities, and the absolute astonishing power of his 4 (my record is 2.3M damage). And Harrow did get stabbed through the chest with War (which is his "official" weapon now... every Warframe has "their" weapons to me, so if I want to use the Boar, I just have to play Hydroid, that's just how I am) so maybe he needs a break.

But, dear reader, this brings me back to the image at the very top of this brief post: the quest "Chains of Harrow" is my next story quest. Truth be told, it has been next for a little while—but it had to take a back seat, of course, for side quests like Octavia and Titania, and a little thing called, you know, Dawntrail. But Dawntrail is done. All my sidequests are done. There's nothing left. The way is clear. It's time to return to the beginning—to Harrow. And then...

...and then...

The New War— ...which, if the number of quests that have it as a prerequisite, and the fact that it doesn't even show up as a future quest, are anything to go by... this will change everything.

EPILOGUE

There's a few things I can talk about that I didn't include here. Duviri. Sevagoth. Lavos and Yareli. That one time I had six Warframes going at once and thought "whoa I'm finally getting this game!" And probably more... but these are the main beats.

Thanks for reading. Why do you keep doing that? I just don't get it...

[daydream-the-demon]

1: Name

2: Age

3: 3 Fears

4: 3 things I love

5: 4 turns on

6: 4 turns off

7: My best friend

8: Sexual orientation

9: My best first date

10: How tall am I

11: What do I miss

12: What time were I born

13: Favorite color

14: Do I have a crush

15: Favorite quote

16: Favorite place

17: Favorite food

18: Do I use sarcasm

19: What am I listening to right now

20: First thing I notice in new person

21: Shoe size

22: Eye color

23: Hair color

24: Favorite style of clothing

25: Ever done a prank call?

27: Meaning behind my URL

28: Favorite movie

29: Favorite song

30: Favorite band

31: How I feel right now

32: Someone I love

33: My current relationship status

34: My relationship with my parents

35: Favorite holiday

36: Tattoos and piercing i have

37: Tattoos and piercing i want

38: The reason I joined Tumblr

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?

42: When did I last hold hands?

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days?

45: Where am I right now?

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?

49: Am I excited for anything?

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?

51: How often do I wear a fake smile?

52: When was the last time I hugged someone?

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?

55: What is something I disliked about today?

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

57: What do I think about most?

58: What’s my strangest talent?

59: Do I have any strange phobias?

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

61: What was the last lie I told?

62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

64: Do I believe in magic?

65: Do I believe in luck?

66: What’s the weather like right now?

67: What was the last book I’ve read?

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?

69: Do I have any nicknames?

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?

71: Do I spend money or save it?

72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue?

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me?

74: Favorite animal?

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?

78: How can you win my heart?

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?

80: What is my favorite word?

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?

83: Do I have any relatives in jail?

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

86: What is my current desktop picture?

87: Had sex?

88: Bought condoms?

89: Gotten pregnant?

90: Failed a class?

91: Kissed a boy?

92: Kissed a girl?

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?

94: Had job?

95: Left the house without my wallet?

96: Bullied someone on the internet?

97: Had sex in public?

98: Played on a sports team?

99: Smoked weed?

100: Did drugs?

101: Smoked cigarettes?

102: Drank alcohol?

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?

104: Been overweight?

105: Been underweight?

106: Been to a wedding?

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?

109: Been outside my home country?

110: Gotten my heart broken?

111: Been to a professional sports game?

112: Broken a bone?

113: Cut myself?

114: Been to prom?

115: Been in airplane?

116: Fly by helicopter?

117: What concerts have I been to?

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?

119: Learned another language?

120: Wore make up?

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18?

122: Had oral sex?

123: Dyed my hair?

124: Voted in a presidential election?

125: Rode in an ambulance?

126: Had a surgery?

127: Met someone famous?

128: Stalked someone on a social network?

129: Peed outside?

130: Been fishing?

131: Helped with charity?

132: Been rejected by a crush?

133: Broken a mirror?

134: What do I want for birthday?

skip the weird ones/ones your uncomfortable w

All of them under cut:

1: Name

I just realized what I wanted to be called. I'm Alexander Cifra Hyde now!

2: Age

13!

3: 3 Fears

Death, nothing being real, [insert existential thought].

4: 3 things I love

My friends, fandoms, Tape Five.

5: 4 turns on

Uhh. I read fanfiction so here are fanfiction ones: Cannibalism, MC being insane, power dynamics, older characters.

6: 4 turns off

Also fanfiction: Can't think of anything except AWKWARD MOMENTS THAT YOU JUST HAVE TO CRINGE AT.

7: My best friend

@author-of-the-year

8: Sexual orientation

Repulsed Aromantic Asexual, but also Aegofictoromantic Aegofictosexual.

9: My best first date

Never had one and never will. Being single is a liberty if you think of it as one.

10: How tall am I

155 centimeters or about 5'1".

11: What do I miss

I miss a lot of things. Mostly miss the time I was actually happy.

12: What time were I born

Two days ago! August 12th is my birthday!

13: Favorite color

Black (all-timer), Gold, Blood-Red... That is my favorites.

14: Do I have a crush

Nah. Well friend crushes? A couple.

15: Favorite quote

"Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." It helped me not feel like a failure. I like this quote. I think about it quite a bit.

16: Favorite place

My home I guess. Old Town Cottonwood is also amazing.

17: Favorite food

I made my own recipe: Rice, fried grated carrots, eggs, cilantro, and

18: Do I use sarcasm

Sometimes? I mean I don't really use it but on certain occasions I will. Sarcasm seems rude to me in certain context, or I'll use it as joking if I just did something and then go "What? I didn't do that. Yep, totally didn't."

19: What am I listening to right now

I am in love with the song Forever Young by Tape Five.

20: First thing I notice in new person

Usually their voice and manner of speaking and how they look. Though I'm not quick to judge a book by its cover.

21: Shoe size

6'5 women's and extra wide I'm sure.

22: Eye color

I HAVE GREY EYES!

23: Hair color

My natural hair color is dirty blonde, and due to how my hair works, it keeps getting darker. (When I was younger I had completely bright blonde hair, now it's dirty-blonde, and then it will be dark brown like my dad.) I have it dyed red though!

24: Favorite style of clothing

SUITS! SUITS. Victorian Era or 1920s style? I can't have enough of it. I wear a tuxedo every day!

25: Ever done a prank call?

I barely even do calls on my own. And no. It's just not- No.

27: Meaning behind my URL

Well, I am Daydream. I'm Daydream because I am a Maladaptive Daydreamer and I create things from my daydreams! I'm a demon. I'm a demonic entity. I have liked too many demons in my time and ever since I was 7 I would draw pentagrams for no reason. I am just demonic.

28: Favorite movie

I HAVE ONE AT THE TIP OF MY TONGUE- AAAAA- WAIT. I just recently watched "Don't Look Up"! THAT'S THE MOVIE! I LOVE IT SO MUCH!

29: Favorite song

Forever Young by Tape Five is my current obsession and favorite song.

30: Favorite band

Tape Five if you couldn't tell.

31: How I feel right now

I'm happy, I just got the Book of Bill and I am thrilled. I also love answering questions!

32: Someone I love

@author-of-the-year and all my friends. I don't think I could live without them... (Literally-)

33: My current relationship status

Single? Taken? Honestly weird-ass shiz. I do have a "boyfriend" but he's not really my boyfriend but yeah. I just say I'm taken so I don't have to explain what being AroAce is.

34: My relationship with my parents

I don't talk to them. They're transphobic and it's hard to live with that. I plan to move out and go no contact. They give me things I want and I'm living an okay life, but in constant anxiety.

35: Favorite holiday

Christmas!!! You get to scam your loved ones out of objects you want!!!

36: Tattoos and piercing i have

None.

37: Tattoos and piercing i want

I want to get an orbital earring on both ears! I also want a tattoo sometime. Something small but meaningful or something. I'd draw on my body anyways.

38: The reason I joined Tumblr

When I learned Bill Cipher was a Tumblr sexyman, I just HAD to go to Tumblr. My first post is of Billtober and of a drawing of Bill Cipher.

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?

Not related. Single and always was.

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?

Yeah!!! From my very sweet discord server.

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?

I never kissed anyone before. Except like on the knuckles, but I don't text her.

42: When did I last hold hands?

With my mom probably. I don't like physical contact at all.

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?

I usually wake up at 6 AM or 6:10 AM and finish getting ready at 6:40 AM. Putting an entire suit on and then getting everything I need for the day AND breakfast in about 30-40 minutes? That's right!

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days?

I don't shave. Makes me feel manly also I don't ever want to feel razor burn AGAIN. Legs are also useless to shave since I always wear dress pants anyways and my hair is light.

45: Where am I right now?

In my chair in my room in my house in my state in my country.

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?

Probably myself in this hypothetical scenario. I don't usually have anyone to rely on. If my online friends were with me though, they would take care of me.

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?

My mom says it's too loud but I think it's reasonable.

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?

I live with my mom and step-dad, my biological dad is in Russia.

49: Am I excited for anything?

Reading the Book of Bill, and whatnot. Drawing.

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?

Opposite sex? No probably not. Opposite gender? Yes.

51: How often do I wear a fake smile?

That, my child, is called autistic masking!!! I do it all the time!

52: When was the last time I hugged someone?

My mom because she asked, like a couple months ago.

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?

Never kissed anybody. Also I'm not a jealous bitch. If it was in the context of cheating? Their problem, not mine.

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?

There is always a reason I trust someone. Real trust doesn't come easy with me.

55: What is something I disliked about today?

School.

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

ALL MY ONLINE FRIENDS!

57: What do I think about most?

Art, and fandoms, and songs.

58: What’s my strangest talent?

Hm... I can put a leg around my head. I have hyperflexibility (but I'm not as flexible now).

59: Do I have any strange phobias?

Small dogs. They just creep my out. I don't like small dogs. Also some thoughts relating to existential crises some people would consider weird.

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Not sure what this means. Oh! I am a model, of course I have to be on camera! I'm a youtuber and a star!

61: What was the last lie I told?

"I'm not trans."

62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

VIDEO CHATTING!

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

Ghosts? Not really. Seems untrue. But aliens? SURE AS HELL! They exist! In all the parallel universes and all the free open space in this universe we have with thousands of stars with thousands of inhabitable planets... Yes! It's proven they exist! Though none have reached Earth (as far as we know) and that we haven't reached any other lifeform... YET!

64: Do I believe in magic?

Depends on what type of magic. Though usually, I would say no. I don't believe in magic.

65: Do I believe in luck?

Well, statistically there is a concept of luck where odds are outbeat by other odds. Not like as a magical thing though, though I do have "lucky" objects I keep.

66: What’s the weather like right now?

Sunny, warm, and dry.

67: What was the last book I’ve read?

THE BOOK OF BILL!

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?

Ew no. I don't like strong smells (even freshly cut grass and lavander piss me off).

69: Do I have any nicknames?

Daydream is my nickname, also Alex.

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?

Broken wrist probably.

71: Do I spend money or save it?

Usually I save it and then I have a period where I'd spend it all. I'm pretty responsible with money.

72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue?

No.

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me?

I have a pool floatie, an axolotl toy, my plants are pink, I have an old pink toy.

74: Favorite animal?

MOTHS! I also like axolotls a lot!

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?

Staying up late looking at BillFord on Tumblr-

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?

Oh huh. I don't think he has one. It's just Satan.

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?

Almost any Tape Five song I have an obsession with at the moment.

78: How can you win my heart?

Just be a good person to me, and CHAOS and WEIRDNESS!

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?

I want my friends' words written on it. I want to be known that I was truly loved.

80: What is my favorite word?

Cannibalism, murder, evil... These are some of the words included in my vocal stims.

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr

I can't really chose. I guess donniipao, calp0sa, author-of-the-year, timedoutradio, and every blog is great as long as there's content and they're a good person!

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?

"I am god." I have to assert my dominance somehow!

83: Do I have any relatives in jail?

No. Not that I know of.

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?

TO DAYDREAM ANYTHING UP. That's my official superpower. I can daydream up anything and everything I want.

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

Oof this is a hard one. Depends on who is asking and what the question is. I have a lot of secrets to hide.

86: What is my current desktop picture?

Bill Cipher because he is my Ford's babygirl.

87-93 were deleted.

94: Had job?

I plan to have one! I want to be an art commissioner soon.

95: Left the house without my wallet?

Many times.

96: Bullied someone on the internet?

Yeah. I used to leave hate comments.

97 was deleted.

98: Played on a sports team?

99: Smoked weed?

No.

100: Did drugs?

I'm a good boy, no.

101: Smoked cigarettes?

I tried once.

102: Drank alcohol?

I tried beer before, not that good.

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?

I'm mostly a vegetarian in my diet, though on rare occasions I'll eat fish or meat.

104: Been overweight?

No.

105: Been underweight?

No.

106: Been to a wedding?

Yes! It was one of my favorite days. I was really young, I remember distinctly putting a bunch of stick-on googly eyes on my face because I am silly like that.

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?

Bitch what kind of question is that? I'm chronically online. I also draw a lot on my PC and I can get sucked into it.

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?

Like a couple times.

109: Been outside my home country?

I currently live in the USA and I'm from Russia, so yes.

110: Gotten my heart broken?

My friends have said to me things I am very deeply sad about.

111: Been to a professional sports game?

Nope.

112: Broken a bone?

I once broke my wrist because I fell backwards from sitting on the windowsill onto the floor.

113: Cut myself?

I have SHed before, so it's a specialty!

114: Been to prom?

No.

115: Been in airplane?

Aeroplanes are so cool! I've been in a couple, going from Russia to the US, and going to my step-sister's wedding.

116: Fly by helicopter?

Nope. Though I live near an aeroport!

117: What concerts have I been to?

I've been to an AJR Phoenix concert once! It was so cool.

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?

I'm gay. Yes- Okay but seriously I'm aroace though I radiate gay energy so yeah no-?

119: Learned another language?

I learned English, and I'm currently trying to learn Italian.

120: Wore make up?

I'm slay! Of course I did! Though I don't do it often.

121-122 were deleted.

123: Dyed my hair?

My hair is dyed red currently, and previously I dyed it black.

124: Voted in a presidential election?

I'm not old enough to do that yet.

125: Rode in an ambulance?

No, I don't think so. If I have, I was really young.

126: Had a surgery?

No.

127: Met someone famous?

Sadly no. But my tumblr mutuals have a lotta followers!

128: Stalked someone on a social network?

I stalk some people, especially tumblr mutuals I want to be friends with but am awkward with.

129: Peed outside?

Yeah.

130: Been fishing?

I want to do it sometime.

131: Helped with charity?

No.

132: Been rejected by a crush?

I never confessed so- Never even tried because being loveless is amazing.

133: Broken a mirror?

Yep.

134: What do I want for birthday?

Well, I already got everything I want- Lol. I got my Book of Bill and I am ecstatic! I want a debt card though so I can finally start online commissions!

[moonsinkfoxgirl]

multiples of 5 <3

5. Most memorable gaming moment?

that moment in Momodora 2 when Momo finally defeats Dora turned demon queen and jumphugs her to save her is the first thing that comes to mind which definitionally fulfills the question I imagine

10. Game you’ve replayed the most?

hmmm SM64 probably? Celeste on second place perhaps... Helen's Mysterious Castle might also take 2nd place though, it's quite short and I have 30 hours on it on steam

15. Hardest game you’ve ever played?

Touhou Koumakyou ~The Embodiment of Scarlet Devil~

20. A game that made you cry.

if we count visual novels then a whole bunch of Key VNs, like Rewrite and Little Busters! and Clannad had me absolutely sobbing, as for a game game, Shinyomawari/Yomawari Midnight Shadows

25. Favorite environment in a game?

whenever there's an area that sucks super hard if you don't know your way around, like Deepnest in Hollow Knight, or Blighttown in Dark Souls, but then you come back the second time and you know the ins and outs and it feels weirdly at home and somehow more relaxing than a less fucked up level would be? the entire map of the first Yomawari was like that once I had finished the game and was just searching for collectibles, there is something so good about feeling at home and safe in a place that is horrific

30. Favorite aspect of a game (e.g. exploration, combat, fashion/customization, environments, graphics, bosses, roleplaying, etc.)

exploration wins that contest by a mile, the environments/aesthetics do need to be up to par to facilitate that so they probably take second place?

35. Do you own any gaming themed memorabilia? (e.g. collector’s editions, posters, prop replicas, statues, clothing, etc.)

got a Celeste Strawberry pinned to my handbag, a Hornet pin that I don't have anything I could attach it to and I have a Celeste mug in my room, oh and I am literally wearing my Hornet shirt rn; but you would know all that you bought most of them for me <3

40. Best game cover art.

judging from my steam library and my various emulators:

[someones-here-for-sure]

idk if this is what you want from but I am EXTREMELY BORED so now I’m gonna answer all these.

1. whats your favorite thing in your room?

poster(s)

2. how tall do you wish you were?

6’5

3. what color is your hair?

brown

4. whats a rare fear that you have?

escalators

5. are you single?

No! :D

6. has your heart ever been broken?

yeap

7. what was your favorite thing as a kid?

beyblades/anything I could pretend to preform surgery on(play dough, card board boxes, fruit, etc.)

8. favorite coping mechanism?

screaming to the void or munching on ice

9. whats your favorite love language?

PHYSICAL AFFECTION

10. how often do you get nervous?

ver

11. if you had three wishes, would you use them?

UH YES?

12. if you could be fluent in any language which one would it be?

Japanese, that way I wouldn’t need subtitles for anime,

13. where do you wish to live?

in the middle of the woods.

14. what’s something surprising about you?

I dont like warm weather? Ig. It’s only surprising if you know my birth name but I’m not sharing that.

15. when did you last shower?

Yesterday night

16. when did you first join tumblr?

idk and I don’t feel like checking

17. do you want any tattoos? if so, where, what, and why?

YES. Upper arms/back, and literally anything that looks neat, and because I draw on myself all the time having permanent doodles would be cool.

18. whats the most prominent dream youve had?

… being chased around candy land by dopey(the seven dwarves) while Bruce banner desperately tries to figure out how tostop him. OR going through a maze with the bubble guppy squad and the once in the middle getting eaten alive by a mummy,

19. whats your dream job?

character designer

20. whats your ideal date?

woods, we run around for hours, and then there forever.

21. what do you wish you could do better?

write

22. what country would you live in if you could?

prolly like, idk Japan? Maybe

23. whos the best person you know?

my bestie (they do not consent to having their name up here.)

24. have you ever walked into something you shouldnt have?

. Yes..

25. whats your favorite holiday?

halloween

26. when have you been most embarrassed?

idk I can’t really think of any really embarrassing moments.

27. whats your favorite halloween costume?

any cosplay really

28. what are you best at?

uh idrk

29. do you know how to tie your shoes?

yes

30. do you have siblings?

3

31. if you could know one thing about the future what do you wanna know?

when my besties die

32. whats a dealbreaker for you?

if someone’s mean to me.

33. whats your favorite current class?

art

34. how many people have you dated?

6

35. how often do you wash your hair?

every other day

36. do you daydream? what about?

not really

37. where do you go to be alone?

my room

38. which parent do you like more?

mom

39. whats the one standard you hold yourself to?

no be mean to people who are nice

40. whos voice do you enjoy?

my bf :]

41. if you could announce one thing to the world what would it be?

“You chose the right religion.”

42. whats one thing you wanna do but havent yet?

paint my walls purple

43. what do you wish you never did?

not sharing

44. do you believe in life after death?

yeas

45. do you prefer book over movie?

Book

46. whats your favorite season?

fall

47. whats your favorite time of day

rain time if it’s raining

48. do you have a beloved stuffed animal?

hehe yems

49. whens a time you wish you acted differently?

not sharing

50. what’s something you wish that you never bought?

ugly dress I hate

51. do you have your own room?

yeah

52. whats your favorite book?

mask of shadows

53. who’s someone you hate?

uhhh idk

54. whats your best hottake?

idk

55. whats your favorite game?

Danganronpa franchise

56. whens a time you felt real genuine fear?

almost died

57. are you a morning person?

hell nah

58. do you drink enough water?

yep

59. how different are you from the little kid you used to be?

HAHAHAHAHAHAA#

60. do you enjoy tumblr?

yes! Alot!

61. have you ever had a tumblr experience that made you wanna delete the app?

not yet

62. whats your least favorite game?

balls IDFK

63. were you a markiplier fan?

yeas

64. how do you respond to compliments?

:3

65. whats something that would make you fall in love?

if I like them

66. do you believe in marriage?

100%

67. do you have a crush on someone?

my bf :3

68. do you like tumblr?

yeas!

69. were you a voltron stan?

idk what that is

70. whats your favorite ship?

too many but right now it’s prolly soukoku and charpim

71. whats your favorite song?

I like a lot of them

72. do you like loud crowds?

HEL FUCKIGN NO

73. have you ever created conflict on purpose?

mwehehehe

74. how do you sleep?

I don’t

75. do you bite your lips?

yes

76. do you use chapstick?

yes

77. do you have any pets?

3 dogs

78. what color are your eyes?

hazel/green

79. what’s something you wish you could change about yourself?

Weight and height and voice and intelligence and morals

80. have you ever had surgery?

no

81. whats your least favorite animal?

mosquito

82. whats something that youre really bad at?

Everything

83. do you have an sqishmellows?

I wish

84. do you enjoy fast food?

sometimes

85. do you like soda?

mtdewww

86. what grade are you in?

uhh

87. do you wear any jewelry?

bracelets

88. what socials do you use?

tumblr, YouTube, instagram,

89. whats your lowest grade in school right now?

socials studies

90. whats the latest youve stayed up till?

all the night

91. did you ever have bangs?

Yes.

92. what trends did you hate?

bangs

93. whats your favorite item of clothing?

SKIRT

94. do you like dinosaurs?

YES YES YES YESYES TALK TO ME ABOUT DINOSAURS

95. whats your opinion on body hair?

Uhh go for it WTF is this questions

96. whats your least favorite time?

probably 3:25pm

97. do you make a wish at 11:11?

No

98. do you have your phone on military or regular?

military

99. have you ever been to church?

yes I go regularly

100. are you lgbtq?

NOO NEVER 😒😒😒😒😒

ask game

1. whats your favorite thing in your room?

2. how tall do you wish you were?

3. what color is your hair?

4. whats a rare fear that you have?

5. are you single?

6. has your heart ever been broken?

7. what was your favorite thing as a kid?

8. favorite coping mechanism?

9. whats your favorite love language?

10. how often do you get nervous?

11. if you had three wishes, would you use them?

12. if you could be fluent in any language which one would it be?

13. where do you wish to live?

14. what’s something surprising about you?

15. when did you last shower?

16. when did you first join tumblr?

17. do you want any tattoos? if so, where, what, and why?

18. whats the most prominent dream youve had?

19. whats your dream job?

20. whats your ideal date?

21. what do you wish you could do better?

22. what country would you live in if you could?

23. whos the best person you know?

24. have you ever walked into something you shouldnt have?

25. whats your favorite holiday?

26. when have you been most embarrassed?

27. whats your favorite halloween costume?

28. what are you best at?

29. do you know how to tie your shoes?

30. do you have siblings?

31. if you could know one thing about the future what do you wanna know?

32. whats a dealbreaker for you?

33. whats your favorite current class?

34. how many people have you dated?

35. how often do you wash your hair?

36. do you daydream? what about?

37. where do you go to be alone?

38. which parent do you like more?

39. whats the one standard you hold yourself to?

40. whos voice do you enjoy?

41. if you could announce one thing to the world what would it be?

42. whats one thing you wanna do but havent yet?

43. what do you wish you never did?

44. do you believe in life after death?

45. do you prefer book over movie?

46. whats your favorite season?

47. whats your favorite time of day

48. do you have a beloved stuffed animal?

49. whens a time you wish you acted differently?

50. what’s something you wish that you never bought?

51. do you have your own room?

52. whats your favorite book?

53. who’s someone you hate?

54. whats your best hottake?

55. whats your favorite game?

56. whens a time you felt real genuine fear?

57. are you a morning person?

58. do you drink enough water?

59. how different are you from the little kid you used to be?

60. do you enjoy tumblr?

61. have you ever had a tumblr experience that made you wanna delete the app?

62. whats your least favorite game?

63. were you a markiplier fan?

64. how do you respond to compliments?

65. whats something that would make you fall in love?

66. do you believe in marriage?

67. do you have a crush on someone?

68. do you like tumblr?

69. were you a voltron stan?

70. whats your favorite ship?

71. whats your favorite song?

72. do you like loud crowds?

73. have you ever created conflict on purpose?

74. how do you sleep?

75. do you bite your lips?

76. do you use chapstick?

77. do you have any pets?

78. what color are your eyes?

79. what’s something you wish you could change about yourself?

80. have you ever had surgery?

81. whats your least favorite animal?

82. whats something that youre really bad at?

83. do you have an sqishmellows?

84. do you enjoy fast food?

85. do you like soda?

86. what grade are you in?

87. do you wear any jewelry?

88. what socials do you use?

89. whats your lowest grade in school right now?

90. whats the latest youve stayed up till?

91. did you ever have bangs?

92. what trends did you hate?

93. whats your favorite item of clothing?

94. do you like dinosaurs?

95. whats your opinion on body hair?

96. whats your least favorite time?

97. do you make a wish at 11:11?

98. do you have your phone on military or regular?

99. have you ever been to church?

100. are you lgbtq?

[zydratevialsblog]

Current Activities in Gaming #1

New blog, new CA series reset because why not. New archive, etc. For the record this series reached around 230 posts, not counting various open world games that got their own series (Skyrim had around 65 posts). Been on this platform for like 13 years. Joined in 2013, that was still on the top end of Guild Wars' original lifespan. It's had a couple of updates since then but I think 2012 was roughly their last major update before moving most of their resources towards the second game. GW always meant a lot to me. It was in that era of post-school unemployment (my first job happened around 2014 and it still took time to get my own computer or even my own ROOM.) so as a result it was one of the only few games I had available. My brother was on and off some jobs so he was generally fueling a WoW subscription and I played that as well. He also funded the original GW1 account which has since been lost due to recovery issues. I can't begin to tell you the hours played on that but it was probably to the tune of two to three thousand, likely comparable to my current day MMO numbers on steam.

Well, I've recently bought a new account and have already put 50 hours into it. My main goal is to try and "catch up" with my old self in terms of progression. In that time I've already beaten the Nightfall and Factions campaigns (I beat Shiro literally 20 minutes ago), so that's Hard Mode for two campaigns so far.

I also went ahead and just paid for all the various core campaign skills just to save me some time and headaches. You see, when you unlock a skill generally it's account-wide so that your PvP characters or heroes can use them. On a fresh account? You are starting from scratch, even your heroes only get some baseline skills. The game just expects you to play every class and unlock various skills concurrently, a lot of what you do in gameplay, can feed into your others and help them out. But I just wasn't willing to run into walls and run off in circles to slowly gain enough platinum to buy one skill at a time. I needed my heroes functional and effective, so I bought all the skill packs. I don't get access to it all myself (though I can do so when I start acquiring skill tomes), it's mostly to benefit all the heroes I quickly acquire on every character so they're not running around with 6 baseline skills.

My next goal will either be going through the core game or maybe Eye of the North. EoTn has more benefits but I'll still need to map out Tyria eventually. It will be beneficial to have at least one "main" that has access to a majority of the map for when I start joining player groups for things. The community is small but it is present, and those Zaishen weekly quests do a good job of funneling players into places. I was just progressing through Nightfall and some late game mission zone had dozens of people in there looking for a hard mode group. (I just went through it myself for progression).

The name of the game here is recovery. Even my main Dervish's heroes aren't quite all there. Not every mesmer has the coveted 40/40 set (something that halves their recharge rates and cast times) which is an expensive 5plat for each item involved. They're also not runed up entirely and I can't afford the various expensive meta defensive runes. Been mostly just slapping Survivor (more health) or the one that gives +10 armor against physical damage which still helps, since I'm running a poor man's Mesway (which usually calls for mercenary heroes and I only have a couple at the moment) but even with four Mesmers they're pretty interrupt-heavy and spell damage isn't often as much of an issue until they start running out of energy.

But my team is pretty powerful, now. They nuked Kuunavang so hard I didn't have to chase her around the whirlpool. The Master bonus for her mission is like 15 minutes and I did it in two, it was pretty funny. Should try that one again in hard mode just for giggles.

Playing GW1 has also gotten me in the mood to play the second which is reinstalling as I type. GW2 didn't have many slots in my CA series so it may have had its own, which is typical of an open world or MMO game. I'm still raking through my 13 year old account to find some of the more unique posts and that generally won't involve a lot of the CA posts unless there's something particularly unique about them for whatever reason. I'm not about to read every post I ever made, but I am skimming some of them.

EDIT: I most certainly had a GW series, I found episode 42 of it so yeah, I blogged my GW ventures quite a bit. There was likely several more.

Anyway GW1 still has a pretty active and helpful community, if quite a bit smaller. I recommend googling the discord and joining if you're still bouncing around old Tyria.

[one-without-fear]

25 Things Ep. II

26) Your idea of a perfect first date?

First? Hmm breakfast date or going to an arcade. Mornings tell you a lot about a person, and competition also shows you who a person is.

27) What is something most people don't know about you?

I’m terrified of deep water, doesn’t matter what or where. I still think a shark is going to get me in a public pool.

28) What makes you feel the happiest?

Watching tv and feeling my dog at the foot of my bed.

29) What store do you shop at most often?

Walmart or Target.

30) How do you feel about oral? Giving and/or receiving?

At first, tbh I despised it. There was no way my mouth was going there. I just didn’t want to, I had a girl do it and she sucked lol. Also, it hurt and that probably played a factor in receiving. Now? I’ll give all day long, I don’t like to receive because I’m afraid it’ll be bad or it won’t be done right.

31) Do you believe in karma?

I do.

32) If you had an hour left to live, what would you do?

I’d make a 20 minute goodbye video, if you’re on it, you were important. The last 40 minutes, I’d want to be having sex. Hopefully I just disappear once my hour is up lol. Not just cease to exist in the middle. Awkward.

33) Do you think flowers or candy are a better way to apologize?

Neither. Had written letter. Flowers are stupid, they die. And candy? Did you eat mine first and that’s why you’re sorry?

34) Are you a good swimmer?

I’d say so.

35) Coffee or Tea?

Tea.

36) Online shopping or shopping in person?

Depends.

37) Would you rather be older or younger than your current age?

Younger.

38) Cats or Dogs?

Dogs.

39) Are you a competitive person?

Yes.

40) Do you believe in aliens?

I believe in aliens more than I believe in ghosts.

41) Do you like dancing?

Nope, I don’t. I physically can’t lol.

42) What kind of music to you listen to?

Rock, country, emo, rap, all kinds.

43) What is your favorite cartoon character?

Tommy Pickles. He was a pretty smart baby lol.

44) Where are you from?

Vegas.

45) Eat at home or eat out?

Depends on what, and who’s cooking.

46) How much more social are you when you're drunk?

Far less. I don’t talk lol.

47) What was the last thing you bought for yourself?

Books?

48) Why do you think your followers follow you?

Depends on the platform tbh.

49) How many hours do you sleep at night?

Not enough.

50) What worries you most about the future?

That I don’t know what I want or need to get to who I want to be. I don’t even know who I want to be, or what I want to be when I grow up 😂

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

366 of 2023

Done and want to do part 1

Put the things you have already done in bold and the things you would like to do in italics 01. Bought everyone in the pub a drink 02. Swam with wild dolphins 03. Climbed a mountain 04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive 05. Been inside the Great Pyramid 06. Held a tarantula 07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone 08. Said ‘I love you’ and meant it 09. Hugged a tree 10. Done a striptease 11. Bungee jumped 12. Visited Paris 13. Watched a lightning storm at sea 14. Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise 15. Seen the Northern Lights 16. Gone to a huge sports game 17. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa 18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables 19. Touched an iceberg 20. Slept under the stars 21. Changed a baby’s diaper 22. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon 23. Watched a meteor shower 24. Gotten drunk on champagne 25. Given more than you can afford to charity 26. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope 27. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment 28. Had a food fight 29. Bet on a winning horse 30. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill 31. Asked out a stranger 32. Had a snowball fight 33. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier 34. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can 35. Held a lamb 36. Enacted a favorite fantasy 37. Taken a midnight skinny dip 38. Taken an ice cold bath 39. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar 40. Seen a total eclipse 41. Ridden a roller coaster 42. Hit a home run 43. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days 44. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking 45. Adopted an accent for an entire day 46. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors 47. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment 48. Had two hard drives for your computer 49. Visited all 50 states 50. Loved your job for all accounts 51. Taken care of someone who was shit faced 52. Had enough money to be truly satisfied 53. Had amazing friends 54. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country 55. Watched wild whales 56. Stolen a sign 57. Backpacked in Europe 58. Taken a road-trip 59. Rock climbing 60. Lied to foreign government’s official in that country to avoid notice 61. Midnight walk on the beach 62. Sky diving 63. Visited Ireland 64. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love 65. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them 66. Visited Japan 67. Benchpressed your own weight 68. Milked a cow 69. Alphabetized your records 70. Pretended to be a superhero 71. Sung karaoke 72. Lounged around in bed all day 73. Posed nude in front of strangers 74. Scuba diving 75. Got it on to “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye 76. Kissed in the rain 77. Played in the mud 78. Played in the rain 79. Gone to a drive-in theater 80. Done something you should regret, but don’t regret it 81. Visited the Great Wall of China 82. Discovered that someone who’s not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog 83. Dropped Windows in favor of something better 84. Started a business 85. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken 86. Toured ancient sites 87. Taken a martial arts class 88. Swordfought for the honor of a woman 89. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight 90. Gotten married 91. Been in a movie 92. Crashed a party 93. Loved someone you shouldn’t have 94. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy 95. Gotten divorced 96. Had sex at the office 97. Gone without food for 5 days 98. Made cookies from scratch 99. Won first prize in a costume contest 100. Ridden a gondola in Venice

[kermakatti]

Some assorted screenshots of my playthrough of Final Fantasy XII

[thathomestar]

The 3 main things wrong with Destiny 2 right now

I've been enjoying my return to Destiny 2, but this has mostly been carried by the sublime gameplay. Most other aspects of the game are in desperate need of refinement, but these three are the major problems that are truly keeping the game bogged down in mediocrity.

Complete lack of narrative cohesion

It's no secret that "sunsetting" was one of the worst possible decisions Bungie could have made for Destiny 2. Removing whole swaths of the game that people paid real cash money is obviously awful, but the knock-on effects of this have been somewhat dire, primarily the fact that you can no longer experience a fairly important chunk of Destiny 2's story within the game itself.

New players starting Destiny 2 for the first time right now have no real entry point to the story. They get the New Light tutorial quests, which are terrible at introducing the world compared to how it was done in Destiny 1. If they bought the DLC, the earliest campaign they can play is Shadowkeep, one of the weakest stories in the game's history and one that makes no sense to new players. Not to mention that the seasonal story model, where you buy a battle pass every three months to access the new story content, locks out the story after the season is over. If you missed the big story moment from a past season, it's fucking gone forever! Fuck you!

There's not even an in-game cutscene viewer or a bare-bones written summary of the events that have transpired. There's an in-game timeline, sure, but it only gives you a sentence or two about the general events of a given DLC's story. It's basically nothing. Do you seriously expect people trying to understand the basic story of the game to go watch hours of Youtube videos to catch up? That's complete horseshit.

Confusing and aggravating pricing model

Some Destiny Youtubers have been stirring the pot recently about microtransactions, and this is not really about that. I'm talking about straight up purchasing the game. A recent change Bungie has made is a Legacy Collection, which bundles all the previous available campaigns together in a single pack. This is good! Why are they still available to purchase separately from the bundle? Like seriously, look at this store page:

This is a whole bunch of redundancy, and it only serves muddy the waters. "This is so people who have some of the DLC don't have to rebuy the ones they already own when they buy the bundle" that's stupid. There's two solutions to this: either A) have the bundle recognize which DLCs you own and offer a discount based on that (this is possible to do on Steam already), or B) just lower the price of the whole bundle to the price of the latest included expansion (which is Witch Queen, so $30) so people won't feel that bad about rebuying something they own. The latter is what FFXIV does. Buying the latest expansion gets you all the ones that came before it bundled in for $40. Easy. Makes sense.

Then we have the Forsaken Pack and 30th Pack. The Forsaken Pack should just be included in the free to play portion of the game. The fact that they culled Forsaken from the game but still charge money for that content is insulting, though the 30th Pack is arguably worse. $25 for a single dungeon and a single exotic weapon. For the record, dungeon keys, which give you access to two dungeons, is $20. A complete slap in the nuts ripoff.

Speaking of dungeon keys, the fact that dungeon keys have to be bought separately from its corresponding expansion is moronic. Regardless of the reasons Bungie does what it does with dungeon keys (or excuses people come up with for it), it ends up feeling like squeezing people for every dollar they have.

I know at the end of the day, Bungie is a business, and they need money to pay their staff and survive as a studio, but they really need to give some thought into how people actually purchase their game, the process they go through, what they see and encounter along the way, because for a lot of people it's really, really off-putting.

Lack of meaningful player interaction

So Destiny's whole thing is that it's an MMO, right? At the very least, it takes a lot of elements from more traditional MMO games. Something it does not do very well is get people to actually mingle with each other in a meaningful way.

When I play FFXIV, I can strike up a conversation with people hanging out in the main cities if I so desire. There will be people willing to engage in some small talk at the very least. You might tell someone you think their character looks cool, you emote at each other, maybe even add each other to your friends list. You basically cannot do this in Destiny. Text chat might as well not exist with how little I see people use it, and almost nobody opts in to voice chat during activities. People occasionally emote at each other in the Tower or in the field, and that's about it. I've made friends with random people playing FFXIV. I have not made friends with anyone playing Destiny.

Destiny also lacks a proper Group Finder feature common in most other MMO games. They've toyed around with adding matchmaking to raids, but that feature has been in Beta™ for roughly 7 years, so it's safe to say it's never going to properly get off the ground anytime soon. People trying to find pick-up groups for harder content have to use external sites (or know a guy who knows a guy, which is how I've gotten through most of D2's raids).

They have taken a small step in the right direction with player commendations, where you can rate whether people on your fireteam were fun to play with, were a stout ally, or fashionably dressed. This is good! But they really need to make it easier to communicate and form groups outside of matchmaking from within the game to truly take a big step forward.

just about the most interaction i ever managed to get in the tower

To summarize, you can't experience a large portion of Destiny 2's story within the game, trying to buy the game itself is convoluted and the pricing structure is all over the place (and kind of high in my opinion), and for an always-online MMO-style game, it's challenging to find groups or even make friends with other players. Destiny 2 feels like a game that is in desperate need of some true backend maintenance and development, but that kind of work doesn't translate into profit, so it is heavily minimized.

A player starting for the first time right now is not going to know who Cayde-6 is outside of a couple of references. He has been effectively excised from the game. Why should they care about his return in The Final Shape?