#I might send u more of my daydreams about ur fics

[thybirbman]

I said Chasing Shadows instead of One Step Forward Three Steps Back, which goes to show my horrible memory, and I will never recover, bury me next to Kakashi's peace of mind and engrave the entirety of Here Before and After Me on my tombstone.

I would say this counts as a ficlet, if only because I want to hold the title of the first person to write a ficlet (not counting plain prompts) for you.

One of my favorite fanfic tropes (other than time/dimensional travel) is "[insert group of people] watch [insert other group of people, or the group of people but at another time] who don't know they're being watched and it reveals stuff (usually how group 2 are actually great or traumatized)". Idk, it just- it makes my brain mmmmm. There is a reason I refresh my search for fics where "Team Minato see Hokage/ANBU Kakashi be cool and BAMF" every month. I could write it myself but. I want someone else to have my exact idea and write it, which is a completely reasonable thing to want and possible to achieve.

ANYWAY, uh, thank you for enjoying. I imagine that in this (crack) universe, Danzou goes on a (funny) rampage, hunting down Tsunade and forcing her to return to the village and unlock the Senju compound, before then search every inch of the place and finding like a bunch of letters and poems sent back and forth between Madara and Tobirama, he then changes his goal in life to include the Uchiha in the village and everything fixes itself. Oh, or when Madara attacks during like the four day war at the end, they summon Tobirama and the war ends immediately bc Madara is evil and all but Tobirama has a really good disappointed-in-you look and he much prefers when Tobirama is proud of him and gives him lil nose and forehead and eyelid kisses, just kisses his entire face, he likes that a lot. Actually, canon now, in this universe, Madara went insane bc of Izuna's death, yes, but his madness was held off until Tobirama went on a week long mission and without him there to keep him in check, Madara could finally lose his shit. Zetsu fucking idk... combusts for unknown reasons, maybe bc of Madara's too pure love for Tobirama.

Okay, imma stop now and actually read the new chapter to One Step Forward Three Steps Back. Byeeeeee!

I have been day dreaming about Chasing Shadows on the regular but I have a bad memory and am bad at day dreaming, so it's just been the exact same idea every time, but I enjoy so much, so here it is:

Uhhhh, because of [insert plot reasons], Ichigo is gonna get mind walked. Maybe she was convinced after realizing how people view Tobi-oji/Dara-oji, and has now made it her life's mission to explain to everyone that no, they were actually great and not at all murderous, unless it was necessary and unless it was with each other beause there was "tension" between them according to Mama and Touka-nee said they should just fuc-.

ANYWAY, cue the entire adult cast watching multiple memories of Ichigo continuously walking in on Madara and Tobirama very clearly having been making out until a second before she walked in.

One memory is Ichigo visiting her Oji-san's house, but no one opens the door when she knocks, so she sneaks in through the window in the kitchen and she starts looking for Tobirama but doesn't find him. Eventually, she ends up at his bedroom door and manages to just barely crack it open, only for a very disheveled and barely dressed Madara to shoot out from the opening and almost slamming the door shut, only to stop at the last second and quietly closing it. All she managed to see was a messy bed with her Oji-san curled up in it, seemingly asleep.

"Your oji-san is, uh, tired, Ichi-chan. He... experimented. Yes, that. Did that very late into the night. So. He needs sleep. Which I'm making sure he gets." Before ushering her out the door with a tired, if slightly stressed, smile on his face. His neck is also covered in bruises that look like teeth marks, probably from her Oji-san beating him up for interrupting his experiments, because the only one allowed to interrupt is her and no one else (lie, she's not allowed to interrupt either, but Oji-san would never beat her up for that, just scold her).

Hmmm, she would usually just break in again after getting kicked out, but her Oji-san really does need whatever sleep he can get... She'll break in again later.

Another memory is her walking into the Hokage office, only to find her Oji-san pushed up against the office desk by Madara. Tobirama pushes him off immediately, going to right some of his clothes that are now out of place, including the opening to his happi, one side of which as nearly been pushed off his shoulder.

"What are you doing?" Ichigo asks as Tobirama snatches her up from the ground and starts walking away with her. Madara is laughing so hard he's sitting on the floor.

"Nothing." Oji-san's voice is rough and his face is bright red.

"Didn't look like nothing!"

"You'll learn when you're older."

"You never say that! You say you can learn anything if you try hard enough."

"Yes, well, this was boring adult stuff that you won't want to understand until you're older."

"Wrong, because I wanna know now."

"I will let you test my new seal if you never ask or speak of this again."

"Deal."

Madara is still laughing, the sound echoing through the corridor until the door shuts itself.

And it just goes on and on like that. Maybe throw in a memory with Touka where Ichigo is complaining about them always fighting and Touka pats her head before saying "They just really gotta fuck." Which is a WILD thing to say to a seven-year-old, but Touka never claimed to be good with kids and, in fact, strives to be a horrible influence.

By the end of the mind walk, Ichigo is squinting into the distance because 11 is old enough to start figuring out what the hell was happening all those times, Hiruzen is staring into the distance looking haunted, Danzou looks like his entire world just stopped making sense only to suddenly start making way more sense at the same time, Kakashi looks like he would like to be anywhere else but also he can't stop checking out Madara's ass, Shikaku looks like he wants to smoke twenty cigs at once before entering a coma, Inoichi has his head in his hands and is just slowly shaking either from laughing or crying or both, and Chōza is torn between going "awwwww" because that was some adorably dorky love and "fuuuuuucking what" because fuuuuuucking what.

So, yeah, probably none of this is going to happen in the fic, but by god has the thought been stuck in my head for days and now it will be stuck in yours too.

I'm in actual fucking tears thanks!!! Lying prone on the floor of an airplane isle losing my mind!!! I've read this like 6 times now and lose it the same way each time, I'll never recover

I'm?? Honored u like my fic enough to day dream about it???? Fucking crying rn oh my god. They need to GET A ROOM!!!! Ok actually got one, but they need to GET A BETTER ROOM!!!!!

This reads like one of those "characters read the original book/watch the anime" fics but the "anime" is just a highlight complelation of times Madara and Tobirama narrowly avoiding getting caught getting a little too up close and personal

You're right and it'll definitley never happen in the fic but I will never stop thinking ab the pure comedy of this now, so thanks

[ofmermaidstories]

hey!! so i'm rereading something just like this right now to prepare for reading the new chapter and i was just wondering if you've ever thought about making a traditionally published book?? of course fan fiction is a legitimate form of artistry and i don't ask this to demean your work AT ALL but ur writing style is so elegant and descriptive while being easy to digest and i think that you would make and absolute killing in the industry if u ever did decide to write a traditionally published book

anyways feel free to disregard this ask if it's something you've already answered before or don't feel the urge to answer!! i love all of your work and am waiting patiently yet intensely for more!! thanks for everything that you do<3

Hello!!! You are very sweet to say so, Anon, lmao. I would love to make a killing in the industry. 😌 Some monies for fancy manicures and iced lattes and other lil treats. 😌

I actually have thought about trying my luck pursuing traditional publishing! I mean—I have a finished manuscript, LMFAO. It’s the first in a duology! It needs editing (rewriting, really), because I finished it in like, February 2020 and then proceeded to get distracted by the lockdown and the terrible decision to download tiktok (which opened my eyes to BNHA and self-insert fanfic), but it’s done. 📖

It’s Young Adult, because I am always writing for the teenager I was, and is multi-POV’d between our three leads (a grump of boy and the two girls that now have to protect him) and involves them causing wilful damage, in order, to some downtown traffic, the school grounds (multiple times), a grocery store and lastly each other’s (and their own) feelings. 🥹

For a long time I lived in this story, like I do now with my fics—talking to everyone about it, making it everyone else’s problem, fretting over plot choices, etc etc. Taking it from a tentative idea to a outline to finally finishing the first draft was the first time I’d ever completed one of my stories. 🥺 I’ve drawn the main characters over and over again, made them playlists, dedicated notebooks to the story and it’s world—I believe in it fully and absolutely, not because I think it’s anything groundbreaking, but because it’s exactly the kind of story 16-year-old me would’ve curled around and used to daydream with. 🥺

But idk. I’m not very ambitious by nature, lmfao, and you have to be in order to jump through the hoops you need to when it comes to traditional publishing. If there was a way to protect my lil story and still share it freely, without worrying about someone stealing it and sending it to a publisher with their own name slapped over the top, then I would. 🥹 I’ve always liked telling stories. Verbally, to the younger kids in the neighbourhood. In a school notebook that I made my friends read. On roleplaying forums. Uquiz! I’d love to be able to walk into a bookstore and find my book and be like “hehehe that’s mine >:)” but if it never panned out for whatever reason (not finding an agent, for example, or a interested publisher) then—oh well! I did my job; the story got told, even if it was only to me. 📝🌷

Either way, tbh we have more important things to worry about—a traditionally published book is a far-off, future maybe dependant on other people that might never happen. Finishing the Deku fic, on the other hand? It’s right here, right now, and is something I can do by myself. 😌 I will work hard on giving it the end it and u deserve, Anon. 😌 Thank-you for being here. 💖🌷🪻🌾

[jlf23tumble]

hii!! how are you? happy holidays, i hope you’re doing ok!! i wanted to ask u for a fic rec, bc ur taste is!! so good! do u know any good hot larry girl fics? as in louis and harry are both girls? thank u!!

Oh my god, okay, so I started this last night, then the power cut, I lost it all, and now I’m doing it again, sigh, but rest assured, I have a TON of faves, there are so many greats, but I’ll try to keep it somewhat normal sized, ha, and put it under a cut. Hope you find some fics you love, quite a few are recent, but there is some old gold, too! Pouring one out for Phoenix’s OUTSTANDING genre-defining girl direction fics, and if you want those, she has them, you just have to contact her directly. Anyway, here we go! Girl direction ahoy, bb!

Let’s being with the larger places to start, no. 1 being @girldirectionsource, your place for fic, art, and everything else girl direction, especially if it’s recent--there’s an older fic rec source called @hlgirldirectionfics, but it hasn’t updated in a while. Two fic fests might help, too (and I want to say there were others, but I’ll be damned if I can think of/find them right now, so if anyone wants to send them my way, I can add on here): the Girl Direction Winter Fic Fest and the Girl Direction Fic Fest. @star55 is an amazingly prolific fic writer who writes hl girl direction exclusively, ao3 link here. 

There are other writers who have written multiple hl girl direction fics, so I’m going to group them with my two fave girl direction stories they’ve written, but definitely check out their other works, too (they’ve written tons of both hl girl and boy direction, fwiw):

momentofclarity/ @gaycousinlarry:

daydreams are made of this, 19k, series.  Mannnn, one of my fave writers, and god this series! Is! So! Good! The pining! Help!!! 

still feel the same around you, 13k. I’m addicted to the way Eli writes older larry, doesn’t matter if it’s f/f or m/m, gimme gimme!

disgruntledkittenface/ @disgruntledkittenface:

dream lover, 5k. Why aren’t there MORE reimaginings of Real Housewives in the girl direction universe? Sweet dreams are made of these, etc.!

pink like the paradise found, 18k. I’m always complete trash for the tag “louis tomlinson calls harry styles pet names,” but trust me on the rest of this fic, simply too much to love!

LoadedGunn:

Riding Comfortable, 8.9k. I’m always gonna side-eye a 25YO CEO, but yeah, LoadedGunn wrote girl direction back in the day, and yeah, nailed it!

Lips Won’t Let Me Go, 5.5k. Why does this read so real, regardless of whether it’s boy direction or girl direction?? (this being limo sex and award shows)

homosociallyyours/ @homosociallyyours:

Sour/Sharp/Salty/Sweet, 5.7k. Megan is such a POWERHOUSE writer, but the way Megan writes girl direction? Next level, way too hard to pick two, but c’mon, gotta go with the pubefest entry!

Don’t Have to Be Good to Be My Girl, 12k. HoooooBOY, this fic is so great, gotta love a good daddy kink and kink negotiation, exploration, and fallout.

Blake/ @newleafover: 

Something in the way she mooooooves, 11k. I’m gonna list three by Blake here because I can, god, I love 'em all so much! This one’s set in Davis, too, woo hoo!

Ballet Direction, 22k, series. JESUS, I love everything about this fic so much (so many easter eggs, true, but also the idea of this ballet class, disaster ballerina Harry, we love to see it).

Harriet and Louise, 28k. This one lived in my head rent free for a good long time, and it didn’t disappoint, the perfect Jane Austen story.

Okay, NOW let’s get into some one-off stories, and yes, the authors might have written other girl direction fics, but these are a great place to start...and yes, I know these don’t include EVERY single girl direction fic ever written, but these are some of my faves, most of ‘em recent:

Needy, SelinOriginal, 3.3k. This fic, just wow--give me some Princess Park, some daddy kink, some insecure period sex vibes, and some body worship, and I”m alllll set.

You Saw Me Standing Alone, yeah_alright, 4k. Why does this work so well? OF COURSE, this includes the pairing Harry Styles/the moon, but my god, it works.

Hoist the Colours High, @kerasines, 5.2k. The story Kim was born to write, I sooooo want to see at least 10k more, Pirates of the Caribbean AU.

all down your shoulders and back, eleadore, 5.3k. This focus on Harry’s hair and cutting it was so far ahead of its time, yet absolute canon? In 2014?? Yeah!

let me be yours, louhearted, 6.6k. Come for the daddy kink and Louis calling Harry baby, but stay for the overall softness and canon vibes of it all, yeah!

Got Me an Appetite, zedi, 8k. Honestly, everything in the gaybo fest is MUST READ, but this one fits into what you want to see in girl direction for sure (plus these tags, whew).

Make the Yuletide Gay, @flowercrownfemme, 9.7k. This is literally a Hallmark movie come to life, well, a Christmas in Connecticut AU come to life, but I adore the way Chloe made it come to life.

lend me your thoughts, HappyPrincess, 9.9k. I have (and will) read anything Nin writes, and this one, big WHEW vibes, me as all the comments (canon spanking and kink exploration and exhibitionism, ahoy!).

when half spent was the night, @juliusschmidt, 14k. This advent fic owned me when it came out, and I hold out eternal hope for a sequel (Louis’s pregnant, Harry’s the doula, and that doesn’t even BEGIN to express how much ground this one covers).

Tell Me This Is Paradise, QuickedWeen/ @becomeawendybird, 14k. If you read NOTHING else on this list, this series right here is the one you absolutely have to pick, every installment is hotter than the last, plus the characterization is just so good! But everything else? VER VER GOOD!

Lesbian!Alphas series, bottomlinsons, 20k. I’ll admit it’s been a while since I read this one, but I think the world of fic could use more lesbian alphas (Taylor Swift even sang about it, c’mon!) 

[seijorhi]

asks :)

sorry for being a little mia yesterday/today - i’m bad at answering stuff :(

Were the team like "Meian we have an idea for a team bonding exercise hear us out" or was Meian's idea? A way to get their manager undercontrol before they got the team in deeper trouble? Did Meian get his turn??

I love your stories!

people seem to have fundamentally misunderstood the ending of unprofessional. when meian said the others were coming, he meant they were comin’ for their turn with their pretty lil manager 👀asdfgfcghjhjkl no, but meian was definitely on board with the plan - it might not have been his idea, but he certainly wasn’t objecting. it’s for the good of the team, after all. 

and thank you!

Sakusa walking alone with manager-chan: it’s free real estate

where is the lie??

IM INLOVE WITH THE NEW FIC😭 I JUST FINISHED MY EXAMS AND IT WAS GOOD REWARD I LOVE I LOVE ITTTT😭😭😭

ahhh thank you bby!! and i hope your exams went well!! i’m sure you kicked ass!

POOR LITTLE MANAGER CHAN. I never thought anything could make MSBY boys hotter, but mean!Meian takes the cake~ I want him to act like the good guy after all this is over, to pretend to be the one looking out for their dear sweet manager, all the while he conspires with the boys behind our back 😊

y’all should know better than to trust any man in my fics. meian would 100% stay back to ‘clean you up’ and take care of you. he’ll be the one making sure you don’t neglect your duties, while also making sure you’re not being treated too roughly by his boys. mostly. well, you can take it.

THE MSBY FIC IS SO GOOIID. Would u mind me asking what’s gonna be ur next fic?

bold of you to assume i know the answer to that

I love the idea of Sakusa getting to stake his claim first. Sending the rest of the boys a couple of pics. You snooze you lose! It was the perfect opportunity, how could he not take advantage? I for one would have probably got in his car like a naive idiot!

This is one thing about your fics I love. There is so much side plot and nuances we can explore. I dont know how to describe it, I just love the depth! Plus the smut is hot as hell 💕

sakusa might not film it, but he sure as hell ain’t against sending some pics of the aftermath, just as a less than friendly reminder of who you really belong to. out of all of them, i definitely think he’s the most possessive. 

and i’ve joked with some of my moots before that i am incapable of writing anything, much less smut, without throwing in a fuckton of backstory, even if i don’t actually write it all in. it’s always fun to write about tho, and i get super excited when somebody picks up on a little thing and i get the excuse to ramble on about it a little more! anyway ily, thanks for the ask!

not me laying in bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking about Tomas, Inunaki and Meian having their turn with me 🧎🏼‍♀️

i was tired and wanted the fic posted but rest assured anon, it happened

I just wanna say your protectivecop!Daichi makes me feel things I didn't know I had but also physician!Ennoshita getting quite handsy during the hour where he's helping you stretch and I'm just .... whoa like I would love to have Ennoshita look after me and also Daichi 🥰🥰- @itishebihime-samaforyou

hhhh i don’t write nearly enough ennoshita.... or actually... none at all, which is a disgrace! because yes!! he’s just so sweet and calming isn’t he? you trust him. even when his hands touch places you don’t think they’re supposed to, even when they linger, squeezing, he’s just doing his job, right?

Settle Oikawa bringing his perfect little family to his games and showing them off before the crowd and his opponents 🥺

he’d have to trust you to behave before he’d let you do that ;)

On the wiki page it says Osamu, with enough provocation, gets angry and physical, and spews profanity. Led to me thinking Osamu's poor gf trying to break up with him for some reason, she's moving away for school, he's getting too clingy, or letting atsumu's hang around too much and being a bit creepy, or what ever. Just GF saying enough is enough we should move on and Osamu, sweet chill Osamu just going apeshit. It would be terrifying!

angry atsumu is one thing, angry osamu is a whole other ballgame! but yes, he’d lose his shit, you’re not going anywhere and you’re sure as fuck not leaving him.

rhiiiii 🥺 would the soulmate nastyboy miyas ever show you a smidgen of kindness? like the thing thats coming to mind for me is if reader was delirious and sick with a fever or something and she was in a lot of pain and they like 🥺 did one ☝️ nice thing in their horrible little miya lives

(I ask this because I have an infection in my jaw thats making my wholeass head hurt and I’m pretty mmmmm sick rn, so I’m mindlessly daydreaming about evil miyas being Nice™ to my heavily-medicated ass AHFIAHHD)

first of all, i hope you’re doing okay bby! please take care of yourself, gets lots of rest - i’m sending you all the love!!!

secondly, absolutely! don’t get me wrong, no matter how good you are, how much of yourself you give them, they’re never gonna be soft and sweet with you all the time, but they do love you. if you did get sick, osamu’s gonna take time off work to stay at home and cook for you, trading off with atsumu over who looks after you. and i think if you were heavily drugged out of it, they might just let their guard down a little - you’re not fighting back against their ‘affection’ so they don’t have to act so harsh about it. there’s just something about you being all soft and pliant that’s almost domestic. expect a lot of smothering cuddling.

Hi! I just read Final Girl, (absolutely loved it btw 💖) but I was curious, if she was pregnant but in the tent with her boyfriend did he assume it was his or did he know? I was just curious and thinking about the back story! Thank you :)

so there’s actually like a few months that pass between when the reader’s campsite is attacked (and her friends/boyfriend are all hunted down and killed) and the scene where she’s pregnant and running through the woods - so the baby daddy’s one of the trio 👀

Bless your brain and all its glorious lewd genius UwU - @beany-goes-dark

ahh bby, you give me far too much credit but ily!!

Please take of yourself and stay safe ily we can wait 💖✨

on a physical level i understand this, but my monkey brain drives me to write until 4am in the morning i am not the one in control here (but shgjhjkfgjkl thank you you’re so sweet!)

Hey! I was wondering if it's okay if I talked to you about my kin list and showed it to ya? I've never made one and I genuinely have no one to talk to about it or show😅 thank you in advance

w-what is a kin list?? 👀

[harrywritingsbyme]

so i put all of the🥺😖😔 asks into a text post with a keep reading bar so it won’t be too visible on you guys’ dashboard. i wasn’t planning on posting them but i know that some of you are feeling sad and you feel like your feelings are being invalidated at times so i’m leaving these here for you guys so that you all can know that you’re not wrong nor alone in your feelings. i love you all so much and this is a safe space for you and i understand. and if you guys don’t mind, i’d like to get us to a place of not talking about it on the blog bc i want it to be lighter and happy...it’ll be better for us all.❤️❤️❤️

Anonymous Said: Okayy but now that I’ve kind of taken a step back seeing him with Olivia and like reading fics is weird to me now. Like he’s someone’s potential bf and it feels wrong, it kind of took me out of a trance and I feel weird abt him now 🥺

Anonymous Said: Anonymous Said: hey babe, I'm feeling so stupid for being angry and jealous of harry. I'm trying to get away from Twitter and focus on other things so I don't get so sad and upset. I thought about so much shit during the last 24 hours 😭😭😭 why I'm so ridiculous and immature.

Anonymous Said: I've been reading your asks for a bit and honestly I felt that way when he was dating camille, it made me realize how emotionally attached I was to h, I felt pathetic because why in the first place I was feeling that way, I had no right, it was ridiculous but then at then end of last year i kind of did therapy to myself (hahha) to figure out the how's and why's, fortunately I happened to travel at the same time so I took a well deserved break and that helped me immensely. I'm going to say now that it's valid to feel that way- obviously not the ones that send hate or harass their s/o- but it's important to re evaluate ourselves and keep things balanced. I hope you have a great day :) you don't have to answer or anything

Anonymous Said: anyone feeling sad, remember that there’s love for u out there and it might not be with harry but it’ll be with someone who’s perfect for u. lets face it we don’t know what harry’s actually like on a day to day basis or if he’d even be good for u, but someone out there is so hang in there and take a break if u need :) sendin love !

Anonymous Said: hello i also feel a little like uncomfy about fantasizing now...like naturally my mind will wander cus im such a daydreamer and then my brains like gorl thats someones man😭and i cannot bring myself to do it anymore !? dunno

Anonymous Said: i have felt so heartbroken all day today & i cried over the news & i just think in my mind we actually had a chance @ ending up together & now that he’s in a relationship ive lost all hope when he is the one person i want to be w more than anything & to come on ur page & see that I’m not alone & ur being so kind & reassuring made me feel so much better

Anonymous Said: I really need help and i feel like you're one of the people that can really help😫. When i joined the 1D fandom in like September 2020, i was going through something and 1D like really distracted me and basically saved my life. But now its a new year and i need to focus on so many things ryt now. I feel like i need to take a break from them. Like just delete everything for a bit because im so distracted. Am i making the right choice here😥😥 Love ur page btw❤

Anonymous Said: Harry definitely has a huge affect on my life I spend far too much time fantasising about him I think I need to take a step back not from him just help myself realise that he is a real person not just ones in my fantasy’s

Anonymous Said: anons who were talking about getting attached to harry/forming a bond with a celeb that you admire, it's legit a thing called parasocial relationships! basically it's like a more legit version of unrequited love (tho i feel like that's legit, too, and we don't give it the importance it deserves) and it's easy to feel it with celebs who are in the public eye. i remember being on a bunch of niall blogs and people were talking about it when word got out he was dating someone so its def a thing!!

Anonymous Said: I think some people don’t understand we’re not upset that he’s happy or if he’s dating Olivia we wouldn’t be upset or angry or unstan him it just hurts a little bit because we all create fantasy’s where we’re dating him and probably even convince our selves that we will date him one day so it’s hard to see that he might be dating someone (if any of that made sense )

Anonymous Said: The vogue article had me cackling😂😂 -🎨

[luvdsc]

first off, that soulmate au abt jaemin was top notch! i loved it so much, i just started reading ur works n they're absolutely amazing 🥺 when i finally caught on to what was going on in the fic, u have to know that my heart began ACHING istg 🗿 secondly, i aspire to be as good of a writer as u are, any tips on how to start off my writing blog?? super sorry to bother u, i just love ur works sm omggg

brb gonna print this out and pin it to my wall, so I can read it whenever I feel sad and instantly feel better because you are the absolute kindest, honey bee, omg thank you so much!!! 😭💘 thank you for enjoying ellipsism and for giving my writing a chance! I don’t write angst as often, so I’m very happy to see that the angst hit its mark :’)

You are so cute omg, I’m positive your writing is already as amazing as you are!!!! 💗 I’m not sure if you want writing tips or tips about how to start a writing blog? So I’ll put a bit of both! And it’s not a bother at all, lovebug, thank you for showering my writing with love 🥺💚 I’ll put the tips below under the cut!

WRITING ;

utilize your own experiences — this is something I do the most with my writing. My blurbs are oftentimes based on things that happened in my life. The reason why I hold tddol so near and dear to my heart the most is because the entire thing is heavily based on my own college shenanigans and each character emcompasses personality traits and quirks of my own irl friends. It makes the fic more believable as well because you can pull from your own emotions and thoughts from that time and put it into words. I gravitate towards college au the most because there’s no research involved when I’m the primary source :)

daydream — sometimes, it’s best to just let your mind wander and conjure up make-believe scenarios at 3 in the morning when it’s quiet and only the moon and stars are awake with you.

draw inspiration from your surroundings and people around you — this might be a little difficult if you’re in quarantine right now, but pay attention to who and what’s going on around you! go to a coffee shop and observe the different people that come and go. is there something going on with the couple sitting the corner or maybe the barista and her obviously favorite regular that she always gives a free scone to? Or maybe there’s something about the cute boy with the maroon beanie who taps away at his laptop, sipping on a hot chocolate. Make up random scenarios and back stories for these people!

dialogue — read what you write for your character’s dialogue and ask yourself, “do people actually speak this way?” People use the same words often in their speech, use contractions, have um’s and ah’s scattered here and there, trail off mid sentence, randomly go from one thought to the next, etc. Make sure the conversation sounds natural and flows well!

detail — detail is something I struggle with writing, but I feel like I’ve improved on it immensely with this little rule I’ve given myself. Each paragraph (?) has to be three to five lines long on a google doc, unless it’s a short dialogue line that I want to pack a punch with. By doing this, I’m making myself stop and think about the surroundings and what’s going on through my character’s mind or what they’re feeling. As the writer, you already know all of this and may not feel the need to write it down, but to a reader who’s unfamiliar with the universe you created, they won’t know any of it at all. So make sure to add in detail!

write when you feel like writing — this is just my personal opinion on this, but my writing comes out infinite times better when I write when I want to and not force myself to word vomit onto google docs. I kinda did that with I Dare You, and it’s actually my least favorite fic I’ve written on here because I’m not satisfied with the forced execution of it. I know some people prefer to set goals for themselves and write 2k a day regardless, which is incredibly awesome and I admire their determination and will power, but that’s not for me. I only write when I feel like it because I want it to be enjoyable and not feel like a job I’m forced to do. Unfortunately, that means I don’t have a set posting schedule, and fics often get scrapped midway when I decide I don’t want to write it anymore.

write what you want to write — I’m a firm believer in this. Indulge in your favorite au’s and tropes! Write a million bff2l stories (like I do lmao) if that’s the trope that makes you happy!!! Don’t worry about the notes, the number of reblogs, the word count, etc. Please don’t force yourself to write something you’re uncomfortable with or dislike for the sake of notes or readers. Your stories are for you first and foremost, so use them to make whatever your heart desires come to life!

STARTING A WRITING BLOG ;

choose a clean blog theme — make sure your blog is easy on the eyes and simple to navigate! You could be putting out god tier writings like Rick Riordan, but there’s a high chance people will give up on reading it if it’s in neon green, comic sans size 7 font on your flashy blog.

create a master list — this goes into the easy to navigate component as well! It’s best to have all the links to your writings and other important info in one post that you can put in your description for others to find.

use tags — I believe it’s only the first five tags that matter, so make it count! for instance, with ellipsism, it’s a jaemin angst, so I used #jaemin angst, #jaemin scenarios, #jaemin imagines, #nct imagines, and #nct scenarios as my first five tags. They’re pretty popular tags that correlate to my fic, and they’ll bring my fic to the attention of new readers!

reblog your fic — people are in all different time zones, so some of your followers might be asleep when you drop a fic and unfortunately miss it. you can queue a reblog of your fic at different time intervals after you posted it, so that your followers who missed it the first time have another chance at seeing it!

open requests / drabble games — i don’t know if this is your cup of tea, but if you’re stumped on what to write or are looking for inspiration, you can open requests/suggestions or hold a drabble game! This also can bring in new readers and allow you to interact with your followers :) but again, please don’t force yourself to write all of them if you don’t want to or if you’re comfortable with a certain request. At the end of the day, you reserve the right to say no to any request.

I hope these were helpful, honey bee, and please feel free to send another ask in if you want me to elaborate on anything or have any more questions! (Or if you just want to talk, that’s a-okay, too!!!) 💓💓

[artificialqueens]

Not Nineteen Forever (14) (Branjie/Scyvie/Ninex)- Ortega

a/n: hey hey hey! welcome to chapter 14 of n19f and thank u all so much for the love (and tears) over chapter 13. i’m sorry for breaking all ur hearts! hold tight to see where things go from here. the only way is up, right? as always plsssssssss send love and ur fav moments to my blog or to AQ! my fav food is delicious validation yum xoxo

please note: this fic contains young adults often behaving in irresponsible/unadvisable ways with regards to alcohol, drugs and sex. if you are someone who feels as if they could be heavily influenced by fic and incorporate what happens in the plot into ur own life, pls steer clear!

summary: Brooke, Yvie and Nina are three flatmates who forged a friendship in their first year of university and picked up some other waifs and strays along the way. Now in their final year, there are feelings that need to be unravelled and confessions to be made whilst navigating drunk nights, hungover mornings, takeaways, group chats, library meetups, cafe gossiping, and the small matter of getting a degree.

last chapter: Brooke decided that she couldn’t give Vanessa what she was looking for, and headed to her flat to have an important conversation.

this chapter: the girls deal with the aftermath, Monet and her flatmates provide a distraction, and Scarlet has a revelation.

***

Scarlet looked at the door to the lecture theatre once, twice, three times, the biting of her nails an awkward accompaniment to her worrying. The clock seemed to tick in time with her heart, although she supposed it wouldn’t compare a bit to how Vanjie would be feeling.

Sighing deeply and drawing a little star on the edge of her notebook, Scarlet reflected on the events of the past few days. She and Yvie had been sitting watching some dumb Netflix show and procrastinating and had been contemplating what to have for dinner when a message came through on the old Branjie Sweepstake chat from Silky, Scarlet unable to believe it was her from the way she was typing.

Silky: Hey ladies so some of you prolly already know but Brooke ended shit with Vanjie earlier today. She’s pretty cut up about it understandably so just making you all aware so that none of you put your foot in it. Also just keep things on the chat as normal although V will prolly not be out at any nights out any time soon xxxxx

“Holy shit, Yves,” Scarlet had gasped, looking at her girlfriend who was also staring at her phone in shock.

“Well, fuck. She did it,” Yvie blinked at her phone, sighing heavily. There was a small pause of guilty silence, as if the pair of them were contemplating the knowledge they had withheld from Vanessa. Yvie gave a curt shrug. “Guess we can kiss goodbye to ending uni on a high, then.”

“Oh, Yvie, don’t be so selfish! We’ll all be fine, Silk’s trying to keep things as normal as she can for V’s sake!” Scarlet rolled her eyes at Yvie, her girlfriend ever the pessimist.

“Yeah, but you can’t deny things are gonna be a little bit awkward, babe. I’m not here for all that shit, we’re meant to be fully-functioning adults in, like, five months’ time. Not babies with drama issues.”

“The only baby with drama issues in our friendship group is me,” Scarlet raised an eyebrow, Yvie laughing and pulling her close. “We’ll all still be friends, Jesus. I’m just worried about V. God, I’m a shit friend, aren’t I? I knew this was coming and I sat by and let her think everything was fine-”

“You are not a shit friend,” Yvie insisted, squeezing Scarlet’s side so hard she felt her ribs might break. “I did the exact same. Besides, Vanessa’s an idiot if she didn’t see it coming. You can always tell when people are being off with you.”

“Hey, that’s unfair. You can tell that, but whether you choose to admit it to yourself or not is a different story,” Scarlet added thoughtfully. “Like if you started giving vibes that you wanted to break up with me. I feel like I would just lie to myself about it because I’d so desperately want it not to be true.”

“Aww, baby,” Yvie smiled, kissing the top of her head. “You’re adorable. You’re also dumped, by the way. Ha ha ha, dipshit. I broke up with you and you didn’t even know I was going to.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Scarlet thumped her girlfriend with a pillow.

After that, the pair of them had gone to Yvie’s living room in search of Nina, where they got two for the price of one- Nina and Brooke, sitting on the sofa, Nina talking gently to Brooke and the other girl staring so hard at the wall Scarlet was convinced she was going to rip a hole in the space-time continuum. They’d both sat down and spoken about the entire situation, but not in too much depth- Brooke explaining that her feelings towards Vanessa had changed, and she wasn’t sure she was what she wanted anymore.

“Wait, you weren’t sure? Do you not have to be pretty sure about something like that before you break up with someone?” Yvie had asked, her eyes narrowing. Nina had cast Yvie a glare and Brooke had tilted her head back to stare at the ceiling.

“I’m not really sure about any area of my life, Yves, so why should this be any different?”

Scarlet was jolted out of her daydream by the door to the lecture theatre swinging open, her heart rate rising only to find it plummeting again when two random girls from the course came through. A shot of adrenaline gripped Scarlet, however, when a girl traipsed in behind them that at first she didn’t recognise. Then swallowing a small bubble of horror as she approached Scarlet’s bench, she realised that the girl was Vanjie. Her dark hair hung like a witch’s over her face- matted and tangled with the frizz a telltale sign of Vanessa having slept in it and not bothered to brush it either. Her face was a pale, makeup-less mask with a decidedly grim, almost mournful expression. The outfit she was wearing was shapeless, a far cry from the ever-fashionable girl Scarlet knew she was, and the black joggers and huge navy jumper Vanessa had on could well have been the outfit she’d slept in. As Vanessa slid in beside Scarlet, she barely gave her eye contact.

“Hey babe,” Scarlet greeted her supportively, the other girl still not looking at her as she took her notebook out of her bag. “How’re you holding up?”

Vanessa gave a completely mirthless laugh as she scrambled at the bottom of her bag for a pen. “Aha. Not great, to be honest.”

Scarlet was hit by a wave of emotion. She reached out and squeezed Vanjie’s free hand. “Oh, Vanj, I’m so sorry.”

“Please-” Vanessa said, her voice choked and warped, two tears hitting the blank pad in front of her. “Please don’t be nice to me, it’s gonna set me off again.”

Scarlet could’ve cried herself at the state Vanjie was in. She watched their lecturer enter the hall and begin setting up. “Babe, we don’t have to stay here if you’re like this.”

Vanessa straightened herself up, tilted her head towards the sky and wiped two fingers under her lashes. “No, bitch. It’s been four days, I said I was coming to uni today and that’s what the fuck I’m going to do. The bitch might have broken my heart but I’ll be fucked if she’s taking a 2:1 from me either.”

Scarlet’s heart hurt a little hearing Vanessa talk about Brooke that way, but then reason kicked in and she supposed Vanessa wasn’t going to be down to shower Brooke with platitudes for the time being. She watched as Vanjie tilted her head back down, gravity doing little to stop more tears from rolling down her face. She gave a sniff and, in lieu of a tissue, wiped her nose on the sleeve of her jumper. Then, she used the other sleeve to mop up her tears.

“Stupid fucking cryin’, goddamnit,” Vanessa muttered angrily, growing frustrated with herself. Scarlet hurriedly reached into her own bag and brought out a small packet of tissues, wordlessly handing one to Vanjie. With gratitude, she blew her nose on it, the sudden noise causing a girl in the row in front of them both to turn around, her gaze lingering just a second too long on the crying Vanessa.

“What the fuck are you looking at, hoe? You want your face rearranged? You could fuckin’ do with it,” Vanessa snapped angrily, the girl quickly turning back around. Scarlet had had enough. In one movement she swept all of her and Vanjie’s things into her cavernous Hermes bag and shoved at her gently.

“C’mon. We can get the lecture notes later. You need a coffee and a talk,” she insisted, clamping a hand over Vanjie’s mouth as she opened it to protest. Scarlet rotated Vanessa’s shoulders towards the direction of the door and practically frog-marched her down the stairs and out of the door seconds before the lecture began.

“I need a fuckin’ wine and a talk,” Vanessa quipped, before the floodgates suddenly opened and the girl’s face crumbled like a ruin. Scarlet immediately crushed her in a hug. She rubbed her friend’s back and sushed her quietly as Vanessa’s chest heaved with sobs, her crying eerily quiet as if she had nothing left to give. Scarlet felt a wave of guilt crash against her, the thought of what she’d known and kept from Vanessa perhaps having been able to help the situation in some way being almost too much to handle. Just as she was about to let it out and confess it all to Vanessa she felt the girl take a huge deep breath and pull out of the hug. Her face was blotchy with red tear marks, but a small, albeit unhappy smile was plastered across her face.

“Sorry. It’s out now, no more cryin’. I promise,” Vanessa sighed, looking to the floor sheepishly.

“You don’t have to be sorry. Come on,” Scarlet slipped her arm through Vanessa’s, holding the girl up as if she was about to fall down. “Let’s go to the union. Then I can get a coffee and you can get a wine.“

They walked in somber silence, Scarlet giving Vanessa’s arm a supportive squeeze every now and then. She wondered what it would be like to feel how Vanessa was feeling in this moment. Like utter shit, obviously, Scarlet thought as she had to stop Vanessa from stepping into the path of a cyclist, so wrapped up was she in her own world. Somehow they reached the pub in the union without Vanessa suffering any fatal accidents. As Scarlet looked around and noted how quiet the place was, she felt relieved. At least they wouldn’t have any awkward run-ins with anyone they didn’t want to.    

"I’m not even that in my feelings about it. Or no- I didn’t expect to be as in my feelings as I am,” Vanessa began, sitting down at a small table for two and shrinking into herself on the chair. “Like, we weren’t nothin’ serious or anything. So she technically didn’t even break up with me.”

“Yeah, but you still had a connection. That’s still shit to break off with someone,” Scarlet offered, shrugging her jacket off before she could give Vanjie her full attention.

“I know, but…ugh, I’m annoyed at myself, really. Like I shouldn’t have got so attached…but I thought maybe she…maybe we’d…whatever, I’m not makin’ sense,” Vanjie continued, shaking her head and running her hands through her hair to punctuate the end of her sentence.

“No, you are making sense! You’re totally valid. Of course you’re going to get your hopes up if you’re seeing someone that often and sleeping with someone that often,” Scarlet nodded, hoping she was reassuring her friend. There was a small silence where Scarlet wondered whether or not she should ask what she wanted to ask. “‘Ness, how did Brooke actually-”

“Dump me?” Vanessa gave another humourless laugh and shrugged, pulling the sleeves of her jumper over her hands. “In the nicest possible way, obviously. Fuckin’ bitch, can’t even give me anythin’ to be mad at her for. She came to my flat. Sat me down and was just like…yeah, this isn’t working. I feel like we want different things, and I can’t give you what you want right now. Did the whole you’re an amazing person schtick but by then I’d stopped listenin’ cuz ya girl was tryna focus on not cryin’ in front of her. Succeeded, though. Until the second after she left, obviously.”

“Fuck, Vanessa, I’m so, so sorry,” Scarlet sighed, guilt consuming her.

“No, bitch, don’t be. It wasn’t your fault-”

“But, fuck, it might have been,” Scarlet began, Vanessa’s face growing alert and curious. She sighed, wondering if she’d regret her decision. “At Monet’s party…Yvie told me that Brooke had said to her she was having second thoughts about the pair of you.”

Vanessa narrowed her eyes slightly. Scarlet held her breath. She could see the cogs turning in her head. “But that was weeks ago.”

Scarlet clenched her stomach muscles. “Yes.”

Vanessa’s face grew into a snarl, and she gave a bark of a laugh. “Oh fuckin’ Jesus, it gets better. So not only has she sat on this for about a month, but she’s also told the whole friendship group about it. Fuck, Scarlet, do you not think I would’ve wanted to know somethin’ like that?”

“I know, I know, fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t want to know! I didn’t even want to get involved, but Yvie told me and then I just had the information in my head and I didn’t know whether I should tell you or mind my own business, and I’d promised Yvie-”

“Oh, you promised Yvie, that’s alright then. Fuck your friend ‘cuz you made a promise to your precious lil’ girlfriend, that’s fine. Good to know how much I mean to you, Scarlet,” Vanessa spat out bitterly.

Scarlet’s stomach was now tighter than she’d ever felt it in her life. She thought back to what Yvie had said, about the friendship group and about how it would all start falling apart. She thought about if she’d told Vanjie sooner, if her and Brooke could have talked it all out and stayed together. Unexpected tears started welling in Scarlet’s eyes. Trying to calm herself she took a long, deep breath through her nose, which turned into a sniff. The noise made Vanjie look up from staring down at the floor, and her hard expression softened into one of regret.

“Fuck, Scar, I’m sorry. Shit. Please don’t cry,” Vanessa murmured, reaching across the table and squeezing her hand. “It’s not your fault. Okay I’m mad at you, but even if you’d told me what the fuck good would it’ve done?”  

As Scarlet wiped at her eyes with her free hand, Vanessa gave a heavy sigh. “She still wouldn’t have wanted me.”

Scarlet drew her last tissue from her pocket and wiped her nose with it. “But I should’ve told you. Maybe you’d have been less attached three weeks ago-”

“Scarlet, three weeks ago I liked her just as much then as I do now. It was never a gradual increase with that bitch. Liked her just as much the day we met as I did the day she broke up with me,” Vanessa said the last portion of her sentence quietly, breaking Scarlet’s heart in the process. She gave a world-weary shrug as she spoke again. “S’just hard trying to un-like her. Well, in that way, anyway.”

“Do you think you can even be friends with her again?” Scarlet wondered, biting the side of her finger as she worried about the answer.

“I mean, yeah, I guess. I just kinda need my space from her just now, you know? Which is hard, ‘cuz…obviously we’ve all got the same friends and I don’t want to have to hide away from them just to make things less awkward,” Vanessa frowned, Scarlet nodding sympathetically.

“Well, you’ve always got me.”

Vanessa gave the tiniest genuine smile which made Scarlet want to squeal with joy. “I appreciate you, boo.”

There was a small silence in which Vanessa seemed deep in thought. Finally, she spoke. “Did Brooke say anything to Yvie about it?”

Scarlet wondered if she should tell Vanessa about the “wasn’t sure” comment. She decided that the last thing Vanessa needed right now was any potential false hope. Instead, she sighed. “She hasn’t been very talkative about the whole situation. Just basically told her the same as she told you.”

Vanessa put her palms against her eyes and rubbed harshly. “Well. That’s that then.”

Just then, Scarlet heard a small scream of delight. Looking up and over Vanjie’s shoulder, she spotted Monet with two of her flatmates heading towards them. Monique, the girl whose hair was previously lilac, now had a mane of huge pink chopstick curls, and Cracker’s blonde hair was loose over her shoulders. Anxiously looking to Vanessa, she wondered if this was the right time for more people joining them. Before she could make a decision, Monet had reached them and was leaning over Scarlet making to hug her.

“Oh my God, hey! Fancy seeing you both here,” she smiled, giving Scarlet a hug and moving to hug Vanessa. “V, how are you, baby? Nina told me. Oh, not in a bad way, just…so I knew.”

Monet held the hug with Vanessa longer than she had with Scarlet, the other girl smiling gratefully as she pulled away. “I’m alright, bitch. Not great but not the worst I’ve been.”

Scarlet watched as Monet’s flatmates hovered awkwardly. She gave them both a smile. “Hey! Cracker and Monique, right? We met at the flat party. You’re welcome to grab a couple seats! We were going to get drinks, but we got sidetracked chatting.”

Cracker gave a smile of gratitude and pulled over two chairs for her and Monique, then a third chair for Monet.

“Hey,” Vanessa greeted the pair of them, looking down at her outfit awkwardly. “Well shit, this is embarrassin’. I look like a bag of trash.”

“A cute bag of trash,” Monique replied casually, Vanessa blinking a little in response, taken aback by the compliment. Moving on as if she hadn’t said anything, Monique gave a curious gaze at Monet and Vanessa. “So wait, what happened?”

Monet gave an awkward grimace, but Vanessa filled in the silence for her. “I got broken up with the other day.”

Monique’s face dropped in shock. “That girl broke up with you? Girl, that’s a fuckin’ gag, what? You’re so stunning! An’ she’s like…a slice of white bread.”

Vanessa let out the first genuine laugh Scarlet had heard her emit that day. “Bitch, no, stop it. She’s beautiful too. She just didn’t want a girlfriend. People want different things.”

“Yeah, that’s true. My ex wanted somethin’ different too. Apparently that somethin’ different was Naomi with a model body an’ an onlyfans account. Stupid fuckin’ man, thinkin’ I wasn’t gonna find that shit out,” Monique reeled off, Scarlet barely able to keep up with the pace she was talking at. “But anyway, that was, like, six months ago now. Anyway the point I’m makin’ is that it didn’t take me long to feel better, baby, so don’t worry.”

“The ten rebounds probably helped,” Cracker quipped from beside her, Monique shoving her as Scarlet, Monet and Vanessa all let out a laugh.

“Seven, actually! Come correct, whore. Anyway, we can’t all be as loved up as Miss Monet over there,” Monique raised her eyebrows, Monet rolling her eyes in response. Cracker excitedly turned to Scarlet.

“Oh my God, do you guys know what she’s doing?”

“Cracker,” Monet warned, her voice tinged with caution. Scarlet was interested.

“What’s she doing?” she asked, Monique’s face lighting up excitedly. Monet waved a dismissive hand.

“Guys, this is notthe time or the place to be talking about sappy, cheesy, Valentine’s Day bullshit,” Monet said exasperatedly, with a glance Vanessa’s way. The girl in question was leaning forward with interest, resting her elbows on the small table in front of her.

“Well yeah, Valentine’s Day can suck a dick, but if this is stuff about you and Nina then I’m listenin’,” Vanessa smiled calmly, Monet going slightly red at the thought of having to explain.

“It’s really no big deal-”

“Oh my God, it IS,” Cracker jumped in, hitting Monique excitedly.

“Will you two fuckin’ chipmunks go and find Alvin and stop molesting us! It ain’t anything big, I’m just…maybe…gonna ask Neens if she wants to be my girlfriend.”

Scarlet’s mouth dropped open, unable to contain her excitement. She gave a little squeal and clapped her hands. “On Valentine’s Day?”

“On Valentine’s Day! With a treasure hunt!” Monique continued, gushing with excitement. Monet rolled her eyes.

“Oh my God, bitch, can you date me instead?!” Vanessa chimed in, her mouth wide open in shock. “A treasure hunt?”

“It’s honestly no big deal!”

“It IS a big deal, fuck off Monet!” Cracker snapped, clearly fed up with her flatmate downplaying the situation. “So she’s getting all these pictures of Wills…Will Schuester from Glee, Will from The Inbetweeners, Will Young…then she’s getting loads of umbrellas and putting them in a pile- ‘cause obviously they all start with a 'U’,”

“- then -” Monique cut in.

“Why do I feel like I’m no longer in charge of anything in my life?” Monet interrupted dryly.

“- then she’s getting loads of bee-themed things, like honey, yellow stuff, Burt’s Bees lip balm-”

“They know what fucking bees entails, Monique!” Monet exclaimed, Vanessa snorting and Scarlet suddenly so glad of these three girls for the distraction they were providing from her friend’s shitty situation.

“- then she’s putting loads of stuff in a pile that belong to her, so obviously if I was Monet, it would all be ‘MY’ stuff,” Monique continued, ignoring her embarrassed flatmate’s interruptions.

“What’re you doing for ‘girlfriend’?” Scarlet asked excitedly, on complete tenterhooks. Monet opened her mouth to speak, but Cracker got there first.

“She’s made a playlist. A playlist,” she repeated, full of glee. “Of songs with the title ‘girlfriend’. Which there are surprisingly many of.”

“Jesus fuckin’ Christ. Monet, I hate you. It’s amazing. She’s gonna love it,” Vanessa smiled, seemingly genuinely enthused about her plan. Monet was now incredibly flushed in the face.

“I mean, she might misinterpret the whole thing. She might go ‘Will umbrella yellow objects songs’ or some shit.”

“Which knowing Nina, she probably will,” Scarlet offered, eliciting a laugh from Monet. “But it’s cute. ‘Ness is right, she will love it.”

“Thanks, girls. But no telling her, okay? Shit, I’m already so fuckin’ nervous and it’s still ages away,” Monet wiped her (presumably sweaty) hands on her jeans.

“Are you two doing anythin’ cute and vomit-inducin’ for Valentine’s Day?” Vanessa asked Cracker and Monique. The pink-haired girl tilted her head and gave a little smile.

"Damn, you tryna ask me somethin’? You move on fast,” she winked, Vanessa covering her cheeks with her sleeves.

“Shut up, bitch! You got some amount of nerve, tell you that,” she rolled her eyes, trying to look annoyed. Scarlet could tell she was secretly flattered.

“Well, I’m just going on a date with a girl I’m seeing. We’re trying to downplay it, but I’m highkey freaking out,” Cracker smiled bashfully, Monet sticking her tongue out at her.

“Kaaaameron,” she mocked, batting her eyelids. Cracker swatted at her.

“At least I have a date, bitch! What’re you doing, sitting on Tinder all night offering your services to every person you swipe?"

"Ouch,” Monet half-gasped, half-laughed. Unfazed, Monique shrugged.

“Hmm, prolly. Well, unless something comes up out of nowhere,” she said nonchalantly, checking her nails. Scarlet cast a quick gaze between her and Vanessa. Cracker snapped her out of her rapidly snowballing thoughts.

“What about you and your girlfriend, Scarlet? You doing anything nice?”

“We’ve booked a nice restaurant. It’s a horrifically overpriced set menu, but neither of us have ever really spent Valentine’s with anyone before, so we don’t really mind paying for the experience,” Scarlet smiled, feeling herself grow excited at the thought of getting to sit at a fancy table with candles and prosecco and seafood and chocolate desserts and just celebrate the fact that the pair of them were in love-

Well fuck. Scarlet hadn’t seen that coming. Cracker was replying to her, but she couldn’t hear her. Scarlet was only consumed by the one thought in her mind. She was in love with Yvie. Really properly in love with her. Of course she was, it was so fucking obvious! Why hadn’t she realised it before? Scarlet wanted nothing more than to find her girlfriend and tell her, but with a pang she remembered the hurt Vanessa sitting in front of her and knew where she was needed the most. Although she didn’t seem too hurt at the moment. Monique was telling a story and the heartbroken girl was leaning in, listening intently, her eyes sparkling.

“Hey, were we not getting a drink? My mouth’s drier than Ghandi’s flip-flop here,” Monet said suddenly, cutting Monique off mid-story. She rolled her eyes and took her purse out of her bag, promising to buy everyone’s round.

“Uh, leave me out actually. I think I’d better head off,” Scarlet excused herself, the thought of having to tell Yvie that she was in love with her becoming her number one priority. Feeling guilty, she looked to her friend. “If that’s alright, Vanj?”

“Yeah, boo, don’t worry about it! I’m actually havin’ fun for the first time in days,” Vanessa smiled up at her, casting a gaze to Monet who smiled back.

“Yeah, we’re way better than your other friends,” she said, sticking her tongue out at Scarlet who did the same back.

“We’ll look after her, Scarlet, don’t worry,” Monique smiled, taking Vanessa’s hand and giving it a little squeeze, then letting go again almost as if the interaction had never happened. The only evidence to suggest otherwise was a small blush on Vanjie’s face. Scarlet was intrigued by that whole dynamic. On one hand, she wondered if harmless flirting with Monet’s friend might do Vanessa the world of good, especially if Monique kept showering Vanjie with compliments the way she was doing. On the other, she wondered if Vanessa was altogether ready for a potential rebound. Not allowing herself time to think it over too much, Scarlet said her goodbyes, blew a kiss in Vanjie’s direction, and headed out of the pub and down the stairs of the multi-floored union, immediately messaging Yvie.

S: Are you on campus???

A reply came back within seconds.

Y: yeah my lecture just ended babe! Want to meet?

S: I’ll come to you

Scarlet raced to Yvie’s building, the crowds bustling about in the square that separated the union and the lecture buildings blurring into the background as Scarlet half-walked half-ran to get to where she knew Yvie would be. At that moment she saw her- dressed in her ripped blue jeans and her enormous black puffa jacket, her hair swept up into two wild, untameable space buns. As soon as Yvie saw her her entire face lit up in a smile and if Scarlet had been in any way unsure of how she felt before that, she knew without a shadow of a doubt now.

“Hey, baby! How are you?” Yvie greeted, going for a hug. Scarlet instead took both of Yvie’s hands in hers, gripping them tightly. Yvie’s face was instantly awash with shock.

“I need to tell you something important,” Scarlet insisted, pausing for a moment before she could say it. Yvie blinked at her, confused.

“Right, so…you’re pregnant?” Yvie deadpanned, her face still concerned. Scarlet was unable to help herself letting out a laugh. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other.

“Yvie, I’m in love with you. I’m so fucking in love with you, and I don’t know how I didn’t realise it until now. I’m ready, and I’m saying it, and I mean it. And I really hope that-”

Scarlet was shut up by Yvie pulling her close and kissing her gently in one swift movement. In that moment, it seemed as if it was their first kiss all over again, but so much better- the two girls fit together like pieces of a jigsaw, the way Yvie kissed and tasted so comfortingly familiar to Scarlet now as if she’d known Yvie’s lips her whole life. When they pulled away, Yvie instantly pulled Scarlet back in for a cuddle. With her head against Yvie’s chest, Scarlet could hear her heartbeat racing.

“Scarlet, fuck…I’ve been in love with you for so long. Since, like. The Christmas dinner.”

“Let’s never break up, okay? To go through what Vanjie’s going through, or to put you through that…ugh, it’s all so horrible,” Scarlet sighed heavily, tightening her grip around Yvie’s waist. Yvie gave a soft chuckle.

“So this is us, then, is it?” Scarlet could hear the smile in her voice, and she squeezed her eyes shut and willed this moment to stay as bright and clear in her mind as a memory as it felt right now living it.

“This is us, baby. You’re stuck with me.”

Yvie pulled away, and at once Scarlet could see the love painted on her face as she looked at her. “Well, I think being stuck with each other sounds pretty good to me.”

As they both walked away and Yvie held Scarlet’s hand in her own and spoke about what to have for lunch, Scarlet thought about how good she had it and how lucky she was.

She had to agree that being stuck with Yvie sounded pretty good to her too.