#I might sellout after all but

[disgustingtwitches]

MDNI

141 as your drug dealer boyfriend

Ghost- Let's be real with ourselves, Ghost is not a good man. He doesn't care who he hurts, as long as he gets his. He will do anything to get what he wants and there is no stopping him. It's what made him a great soldier, and it's what makes him a great kingpin. He moves weight to put it lightly. There isn't a moment where an uncut key is unmoving; from a warehouse, to a plane (or car, or train), to a distributor, to a pusher, to up someone's nose. He'll try to do some damage control, make sure things aren't cut with fent, but that's only to make sure customers keep coming back. He likes to keep his hands clean, in the sense that he'll never be the one to pull the trigger on anyone that's out of line. Living up to his name, no one knows what he looks like. Hell, a lot of people don't even think he's real.

But when it comes to you, Simon's a different man. No talk about work, just you and him. Other than the multiple hidden guns around the house and Glock he sleeps with, life is normal with you. Holiday homes in the French countryside and Bahamas. Designer everything. Sports cars in all your favorite colors. You want for nothing. It's the life he wanted for you. After all those years of crying and hurt when he was away for weeks or months, you deserved the world. Want the new Hermès bag? You got it. Can't choose between the black or white louboutins? Get both. Stop eating you out because you can't feel your toes anymore? Sorry love, only thing he can't do for you.

Soap- Johnny is a small business owner. Weighs everything out by his own hand. Presses his own pills. Let's you help baggie everything up. A social butterfly, this man is at every concert, rave, or music festival. Sometimes he has a friend help push his stuff when he just wants to stay home with you, but for the most part he's his own salesman. And a damn good one. Never has overstock. No matter how much he brings with him, he'll always sellout.

Has a supernatural sense of being shorted. Can tell if a bag is even a few grams off just by holding it.

"Ye'r an idiot if ye think ye kin short me."

And when the other party denies, he always keeps a pocket scale on him, setting the parcel on it. And sure enough, he's always right.

He'll come home with a few grand, the only job you have is to sit there and look pretty. And roll his spliffs. Sitting in his lap, tucking the rolling paper into itself and licking it closed while he counts out a fat wad of cash. He hands you a fat stack,

"A've never bin good wi' money. Ye know how to spend it better than me."

He never touches the stuff he sells, no need to when all the dopamine he needs is right between your legs.

"Ten times better than any o tha' shite, anyways."

He pants in your ear while folding you in half, firm grip on your throat.

Gaz- When it comes to psychedelics, Kyle is your go-to man. He's a fucking genius, synthesizes his own DMT and LSD in a lab. It's a state of the art facility, clean with the latest and greatest equipment available. He supplies the whole Northeast. If it's a hallucinogen, it's most likely Gaz's product. And if it's good, it's definitely his. He has a cozy set up with some "organization" that he cooks for. Steers clear of actually selling to people, no need to when his clients line his pockets so well. Never brings work home, he even wears different clothes when he's in the lab.

He has a set schedule he has to adhere to but sometimes he's able to take vacations with you. And that's how you ended up bent over a balcony watching the sunset in Punta Cana,

"I work so hard to make you happy, now it's my turn yeah?"

A breeze sends a shiver up your spine while he kisses your shoulder,

"I know a private beach where you can even out those tan lines,"

Of course he doesn't give a shit about that, he just wants to fuck you silly on the seaside (and show off to anyone who might be watching.)

Price- Caring and nurturing, the man naturally has a green thumb. And alongside his prized heirloom tomatoes, he grows really, really good weed. Has a whole growroom in his basement, decked out with proper ventilation, ACs, UV lights, the works. The man grows medical grade weed that private clinics buy from him. He's legit. And of course he serves the public as well under the table, sells only to people he knows and established clients can refer others to him. He treats his plants like his babies, even going as far as to play music for them (according to him classical music helps them grow better???). You don't know where he finds the time, but he also made you rose garden for your anniversary. He brings up the idea of a family every so often. He'll finish as deep inside of you as possible,

"Let's replace that plant nursery for a real one, yeah love?"

Gonna write actual stories for each one if y'all like this ( . * 3 * . )/`

[qqueenofhades]

I got political whiplash on Threads. First, everyone was screaming, “All is lost!” I came back an hour later, and everyone was screaming, “We Ride at Dawn!”

The right-wingers are in panic mode. Steven Miller was practically screaming on Feckless news. 🤣

I mean. The right-wingers' entire mentality, the fuel for the January 6 attempted coup, the recent SCOTUS President God-King Immunity ruling, and all the rest, is premised on the simple fact that the president is indeed, Almighty God King who serves for life and will never, ever willingly give up his power. So that's how I can guarantee that the GOP, because they are short-sighted fascist morons, did not plan for this. Their entire strategy was built around attacking Biden, because they hate him. Like, really hate him. He defeated Trump the first time and there was still a good chance that he could do it again. Trump got impeached the first time for trying to extort Zelenskyy for dirt on Biden, because he didn't want to face him. That's why they went after Hunter on largely bogus charges, tossed around the idea of impeaching Biden, actually (uselessly) impeached Mayorkas, etc.

And yet, because Biden (even if he was forced to do it) decided to step away and voluntarily give up his presidential power instead of wrecking American democracy to hold onto it, that has broken their little shriveled fascist brains. They literally can't comprehend it, and I can guarantee they're now shit scared about having to face Kamala, a brown woman, who is the epitome of everything their tiny evil brains hate. As noted by those bangin' fundraising numbers, there is also a lot of excitement around her. And suddenly, after MONTHS of "this election is a referendum on which old and mentally declining man you hate more," that has been removed as a factor. (Watch the media suddenly forget all about age and/or mental competency as a factor now that Biden is out. Does it apply to Trump, you ask? CRICKETS.)

Kamala is going to mop the f'n floor with Trump at the next presidential debate, and I guarantee that the GOP knows that too. Because yes, if Biden had another bad debate, or if he has a bad case of COVID that might end up giving him long-covid symptoms or keeping him off the trail for days or weeks, that would have been very, very hard to recover from. Now the GOP is the one stuck with an old, mentally baffled, virulently hated presidential candidate and the most pro-Russia, anti-woman, demonstrable-sellout whitebread VP pick imaginable, that they had to choose because Trump nearly got the last one killed and he wasn't interested in the job again, for some weird reason. And as we have pointed out before, this is the last-chance saloon for Trump in any number of ways, and he has been demonstrably overconfident the last few weeks as the media was consumed with discussion of Biden's stumbles rather than Trump's manifold unfitness, treason, felonies, and all the rest.

I don't agree with Biden on everything he has ever done in his long career in public service, but I will say that I don't think he would have actually done this if he wasn't eventually convinced, for whatever reason that might be, that it was the right decision. And my one big fear about him stepping down was that the party would instantly fracture, people would start flogging unrealistic Magical White Boy replacements, and otherwise insist on an "open mini-primary!" or some other fucking bullshit. Now, there are still a few idiots trying that, but by and large, the Democratic power apparatus has instantly thrown its weight behind Kamala. That doesn't excuse them for the weeks of wibbling Anonymous Sources self-sabotage beforehand, and I still vote that we destroy the billionaires at our next opportunity, but if we can stick with that and keep up those mongo fundraising numbers, we might indeed actually have a better chance than before, and that was what this was all about.

As I noted yesterday, Black women have been disproportionately influential in taking Trump down (think Leticia James, Fani Willis, etc) and there is undoubtedly a huge, HUGE amount of poetic justice if Kamala can be the one to stick the knife in his greasy orange gut once and for all. I can likewise guarantee the GOP is well aware of that, and the fact that while they can yell even louder and trot out the same old racist, sexist, misogynist fearmongering dirtbag attacks they used on HRC, that is a strategy with demonstrably diminishing returns (it sure as hell isn't going to help them win any more female or suburban or black voters or anyone else we always hear about how they're Making Inroads with). And we're not going to talk about how it's Obvious that America would never elect a black female president. Obama won two terms. Even with all that weight of frothing misogyny and DECADES of Republican smear machines, HRC won the popular vote and was ratfucked out of the Electoral College by the slimmest of margins, after a massive interference campaign by the Russians. It is fucking possible, we are going to do it, and the Republicans are so, SO FUCKING SCARED of having to live in an America run by a brown woman, that can only be for the good.

Kamala Harris 2024. Let's go.

[superstarz9]

So y’all fw some MORE Mr. Puzzles headcanons?

Cause I got some :]

Even though he streams his content, Mr. Puzzles hates streaming over normal television and believes it ruins the momentum. The only thing he appreciates about streaming is the lack of ads. No matter how bad the ratings are, Puzzlevision is an ad-free service!

To add, product placement is a no-go. Any products he might advertise on a show are all Puzzlevision branded, not that he’d advertise much. He’s a smart business man, which I’ll go in-depth with another time.

He’s all about authenticity with his actors an really hates big-time celebrities. Celebrities are snobbish and aren’t easy for Puzzles to handle. He also doesn’t want people to engage with his shows solely because of famous names. The day he hires a celebrity is the day he becomes a sellout, and the idea of selling out terrifies him.

Mr. Puzzles does an extensive background check of every single cast member he recruits. Not just because he’s trying to find the perfect actors, but because he’s trying to find people that wont be missed if they mysteriously disappear for long periods of time. After a cast’s likability begin to dwindle, Puzzles brings them back as if nothing happened. Previous cast members won’t remember their time at Puzzlevision and have a hazy memory for a bit before they adjust to normal. If they watch a show that they’ve been in, they’re so disconnected from the show that they won’t recognize themselves. However, Puzzles is careful to avoid reruns after switching casts.

He absolutely hates reality tv for multiple reasons. It’s the farthest thing from reality, everything is so fake, and the writing is HORRIBLE! If the audience demands it, he’ll make a reality tv show, but it would be one of the few things he wouldn’t mind not hitting 5 stars. The less creative impact he has on the show, the less he cares for it.

He prefers live-action over animation, but highly respects animated shows.

He likes movies but heavily prefers tv since television has always been frowned upon within Hollywood and the entertainment industry (It’s actually interesting to know the beef between movie studios and tv, I recommend checking it out. To put in into perspective, picture the Disney theatre movies vs the straight to video movies: there’s a huge difference and it’s somewhat obvious of the cash-grab tv movies/shows are. The purpose of tv has always been a quick cash grab, actually. Kinda like the first content farm, to an extent). Puzzles wants to prove that television is a respectable media outlet and shouldn’t be frowned upon within the industry.

He is familiar with almost any televised language. The only major issue is that, yes, he needs subtitles to completely understand. However, he can hold a relatively decent conversation in most languages, he’d just need a few refreshers.

Already talked about it last post but he likes to cook and really enjoys cooking/baking shows. Y’know that thing where you’re good at one but not as good at the other cause they’re so different (you cook to your liking vs following a strict recipe for the best dessert outcome)? I feel like Puzzles would be perfect at baking alone but any baking show he does goes to absolute shit. However, he’s not as great at cooking alone (since he can’t taste) but it much better with a sous-chef guiding him.

This was someone else’s hc (I don’t remember who’s, I’m srry), but they brought up that the order of shows Mr. Puzzles makes with the SMG4 crew reflect the shows he watched growing up (the kids-y shows, family disney-type movies, teen stuff like Scooby-doo, and gameshows). I’d like to add that he enjoys making gameshows the most because he can be the main character in every episode, and everyone’s reactions are the most genuine. The only thing I can see Puzzles not liking is the lack of creativity (similar to reality tv). However, it would be pretty fitting for a production company called Puzzlevision to make game shows.

This one’s gonna be a little bit more depressing. No matter how hard he tries or how good he thinks his writing is, Mr. Puzzles cannot write anything original. It’s the curse of seeing every piece of televised media to ever be produced. He tries his best to be original but as the puzzlevision arc continues, he gradually stops trying to be original, which is what ultimately causes him to lose. While Puzzles keeps trying to copy other successful media and failing, it’s the originality the SMG4 crew produce that gets them to 5 stars (and extremely quickly, too). Puzzles fails to realize that the shows he loves and tries to replicate were original, too, and that’s what got them to succeed in the first place. I feel like this success from SMG4’s originality is what sparked Mr. Puzzles’ envy in the first place.

To add to this, Puzzles has been canonically spying and interfering with the SMG4 crew for a while (selling them the showgrounds, the cursed keyboard in the ITS GOTTA BE PERFECT arc, the Western Spaghetti arc), and is almost a direct parallel to SMG4. They both was to succeed and produce original content, striving for perfection. The only major difference is that Mr. Puzzles has been alone for the majority of his life whereas SMG4 has his crew. Despite this, however, SMG4 still snaps and isolates himself similarly to how Puzzles takes complete creative control.

Not having a proper friend/support group is also what causes Puzzles to fail, isolating himself from the rest of the world. Even though we don’t see much of the studio, it’s still pretty run down and barren, implying that Puzzles doesn’t spend much time there, if at all. Puzzles spends most of his time in the shows, directing/acting/ect, and avoiding the real world where he doesn’t have control. When he’s in the real world and bored, he dissociates a lot, planning out his next big projects.

To add, he’s not a big fan of modern technology as a whole, and sticks to older tech (like the older computer model in the teaser between the scooby episode and the gameshow episode and his head being an older computer). Same goes for the studio. I can totally see him walking into the decrepit building with the real estate agent being like “this building hasn’t seen the light of day since 200 b.c,” and Mr. Puzzles ecstatically goes “I’ll TAKE IT!” He’d also do his own renovations and film it for an abandoned house-flipping series, scrapping it later because he sucks at renovating.

He can’t take constructive criticism if his life depended on it. He tries, but all he thinks is “well these people just don’t understand TRUE art in this world!”

He can play shows/movies in the back of his mind whenever, and often does if he’s not on set. Y’know that reddit/tumblr post about the kid who memorized Shrek so much that he could just watch it from memory and his dad would catch him at the 37:14 mark and be like “stop watching shrek and go to bed,”? Yeah, Puzzles is like that. Only difference is that he can’t pause it, only tune it out.

He’ll watch them, but found-family sit-coms depress him. Shows like Friends, It’s Always Sunny in Philly, etc remind him of what his life could’ve been if he could’ve made friends properly.

To add to this, y’know how he projects himself in his shows? What if he did that with shows like Friends, where he’s a part of the cast and laughing along. He’d do it in his sleep and not even realize it’s a dream until the episode ends and he wakes up alone. :,]

On a lighter note, older tvs release a light frequency that gets louder the older it gets. Mr. Puzzles probably hums a frequency without realizing it that people can only hear if they’re close and he isn’t babbling away. Older tvs also kinds adjust(?) where they slightly creek a lil. Mr. Puzzles probably does, to, and it’s the equivalent of him cracking his neck.

He’s also more prone to shock people slightly, depending on how manic he is. If he rubs his gloves together he’s practically a battery.

He has a daily care routine that involves him carefully wiping his screen with windex.

These ones are more show/content based. If these continue to do well I’ll post some more general and maybe relationship hcs :]. If you guys have any suggestions/questions/critiques please let me know!

[hbdttg]

Part 1 / tag list below the cut

“I’m quitting,” Eddie declares, “I’m out. Call me a tree, ‘cause I’m leaving. Call me a banana, ‘cause I’m splitting. T-t-t-t-that’s all, folks!” he adds, doing his best impression of Porky Pig’s signature stammering.

Chrissy’s laser focus doesn’t stray from her monitor, even when Eddie bodily throws himself into the chair across her desk with a long, strangled groan. Wordlessly, she raises her left index finger at him in a silencing gesture. With her brows furrowed in concentration, she drags her mouse around on its pad and double-clicks something on her screen before nodding decisively to herself. After another few clicks, she finally lowers her finger, raises her eyes, and meets Eddie’s gaze.

“Would you mind grabbing what I just printed? Please?” she asks, smiling at him imploringly.

Chrissy could ask Eddie to bleach his hair and shave off an eyebrow and he’d do it. She’s actually who he has to thank for landing such a cushy job with HHH—a referral from a trusted associate like her goes a long way in a place like this.

And despite Eddie’s many complaints about becoming a corporate sellout, he can’t deny that it certainly has its perks. The office is only a ten-minute commute from his apartment, the compensation agreement he signed amounted to more money than his last two jobs combined, his benefits package is frankly ridiculous, and he gets to work with one of his best friends in the world. Overall, not a bad gig.

Even so, he makes a show of sighing, loud and longsuffering, before doing as Chrissy asks, leaving her office to grab her job off the printer. Eddie knows she works in HR and some of her stuff can get pretty confidential, so he doesn’t even try to skim the contents of the page as he walks it back over to her.

“Here,” he says, thrusting the paper at Chrissy facedown.

“Thanks!” she says. She makes no moves to take it from him. “That’s for you, actually.”

Curious, Eddie takes the paper back and flips it over. In the center of the page is a graphic of safety sign one might find in a cartoon factory, though Chrissy had edited the original from “[___] Days Since Last Accident” to “[___] Days Since Eddie Last Threatened to Quit His Job”. There’s a big red zero in the counter box.

Eddie tries to glower down at Chrissy, but it’s sort of hard to maintain when she bursts into laughter. It’s been years, but the sound of Chrissy laughing like this, all bright and breathless and unrestrained, never fails to transport him back to his (third) senior year of high school, when they first became friends over a failed drug deal.

“Don’t be cute,” Eddie says with a laughable lack of authority, dropping heavily back down into the chair.

“Do you know who you’re talking to?” Chrissy counters, brow raised archly.

Eddie rolls his eyes, crumpling the page into a ball and lobbing it in between them.

Chrissy lets the ball land harmlessly on her desk before sweeping it into the trashcan by her feet.  “Just so you know, I’ve had that saved on my desktop since Monday—and I haven’t had to edit the days count a single time.”

Eddie scoffs, but it’s hard to defend himself when this current visit marks the fifth day in a row he’s floundered into her office, vainly announcing his resignation. “Yeah, well,” he says weakly, “printing it seems like a gross misuse of company resources.”

“What are you going to do, report me?” Chrissy says with a mischievous sparkle in her eyes.

“Let me guess: you’re the one who receives those reports?” Eddie says dryly.

“Yep!” she says cheerfully. “Now, go on and tell me about your latest trainwreck of an interaction with Steve Harrington.”

“Christ, Chris!” Eddie hisses, leaping to his feet and immediately spinning around to check if anyone was around to hear her damning words. The coast is clear, luckily, but he still scrambles to shut her office door before falling back into his chair. “You can’t just go around saying his name all willy-nilly.”

“He’s not gonna suddenly appear if you say his name three times, Eddie. See, watch. Steve. Steve. St—”

“Don’t risk it!” Eddie squawks loudly, cutting her off.

“You’re an absolute mess,” she says through a laugh, shaking her head at him.

And well, Chrissy’s not wrong.

Eddie’s been a mess since Monday morning, when he unknowingly produced, directed, and starred in The Roast of Steve Harrington. He blames his shitty memory for forgetting what floor his new office was on—if he’d known he was sharing the elevator with someone he could have potentially worked with (let alone someone whose surname made up a third of the company name), he wouldn’t have opened his big, fat mouth in the first place.

When he finally gathered the courage to make it back down to the fifty-second floor and show his face at the HHH office, he kicked off his onboarding with Chrissy with a strangled, “I know it’s my first day and I technically just started ten minutes ago, but I quit. Thank you for the opportunity and good-bye forever.”

Chrissy, the traitor, spent a full five minutes laughing in his face over his shamefully recounted story before patting him twice on the head and informing him he wasn’t allowed to quit for at least six months. The overly saccharine tone of her voice alone told Eddie there was no room for argument there.

Still, that didn’t stop him from following her into her office after the all-hands meeting on Tuesday, all the while whining in her ear, “I can’t thrive in these conditions, Chrissy. Please, I beg of you—accept my sincere and humble resignation from this cursed hellscape.”

‘These conditions’ consisted of any rooms and/or conversations that contained Steve Harrington. Eddie hadn’t been expecting to see the guy doting over the catering when he walked into the conference room that afternoon, and he certainly wasn’t expecting his supervisor and trainer, Murray, to lead him over to Steve to introduce the two of them (though that was likely just an excuse to head straight for the sandwiches that were laid out for the meeting).

While Eddie choked on his own tongue trying to spit out some generic, inoffensive greeting, Steve merely watched him with an amused smirk before thrusting his hand out and offering a perfectly friendly “It’s nice to meet you, Eddie, I’m Steve”, as if Eddie didn’t have Steve’s name and face (and stupidly fit body—who the fuck looks that good in a pair of khakis?!) burnt into his memory from the day prior.

Afterward, Murray, who most assuredly did not have a filter of any kind, bluntly commented on Eddie’s awkwardness, then spent the next five minutes trying to determine if it was normal, strangers-meeting-for-the-first time awkwardness, or something more sensational. Eddie stubbornly kept his mouth shut until the meeting started.

Wednesday followed a similar pattern, with Eddie flouncing into Chrissy’s office with a dramatic “I choose to break my blood oath. At this point I’d welcome the sweet release of death if it meant I didn’t have to work here anymore.”

Chrissy just corrected him, patiently explaining that he was employed at-will, rather than by blood oath, and that if he left before his sixth month, she’d personally skin him alive. Eddie had to pause and weigh the pros and cons of being skinless. Surely it couldn’t be worse than his latest exchange with Steve—via email this time, mercifully.

He’d just learned how to field helpdesk tickets and received one from Steve Harrington himself. It was a simple enough software request ticket, so he assigned it to himself and replied with next steps, asking Steve for a code so he could remote into his computer and install the program.

Steve replied back, asking where he was supposed to find the code. It was an innocuous enough question, but then Eddie noticed something a little off about his email signature: his last name was bolded.

Eddie ignored it, assuming it was a stylistic choice—nothing to read into, surely—but then Steve sent another email shortly after to let him know to disregard his last email; he’d found the right app and was just waiting for it to generate a code. This time, Harrington was bolded and at least two sizes bigger than his first name.

Then, in Steve’s third email, sent not a minute later with the requested code, Harrington was bolded, two sizes bigger than his first name, and highlighted yellow—a tactic Chrissy found so hilarious that she had to shoo Eddie out of her office with tears in her eyes so that she could compose herself and actually get some work done.

Thursday was a blessed reprieve from Steve’s unique brand of psychological warfare, but Eddie still somehow managed to royally humiliate himself in front of him. After he slunk into her office and silently pushed a scribbled-on napkin across her desk—

Please accept this letter as my formal resignation from my position as Systems Analyst II at HHH, effective immediately. Effective yesterday. In fact, I’ll pay you back the entirety of my wages earned if we just forget I ever worked here.

—Chrissy tutted at him sympathetically before taking the napkin and reaching over to dab it at the large wet stain on his shirt.

He’d been walking back to his desk from the breakroom when he rounded a corner and bumped into Steve in the hallway. Literally bumped into, bodily contact and surprised yelps and everything. And it probably wouldn’t have been such a big deal, really, if not for the fact that he had a newly refilled mug of coffee in his hand.

“Eddie, oh my god, are you okay?”

No, Eddie wasn’t okay, because he just splashed himself with hot fucking coffee and now Steve Harrington was worriedly fussing over him and tentatively trying to mop up the liquid with his own fucking hands for some reason, and he was embarrassed (and a little turned on?) and he had to get the fuck out of there now.

“I’m okay, sorry, it’s fine—” he managed to squeak before whirling around and scurrying to the bathroom.

So yes, Eddie’s been an absolute mess the past few days, and today is no different.

…Actually, scratch that. Today is different. Today is worse.

“Okay, now spill,” Chrissy says. “What happened?”

With another drawn-out, pitiful groan, Eddie sinks down in his seat and lets his neck hang off the backrest, blinking up at the ceiling.

“Talk to me, Eds,” Chrissy says, concern starting to bleed into her voice. “If he’s actually bullying you, you can file a complaint. I have a form here somewhere.”

Eddie hears her open one of her desk drawers and reluctantly sits up. “He’s not bullying me, Mom,” he says with a huff. “We actually…we talked.”

“You talked?” Chrissy asks, eyebrows raised.

“Yeah, about the elevator. Buried the hatchet and everything. I said sorry, we laughed about it, it’s over and done with.” Eddie’s gaze darts around Chrissy’s desk, searching for something to distract him from the warm and fuzzy feeling growing in his stomach at the memory of their conversation.

“That’s great, I’m so proud of you!” Chrissy says cheerfully. “But wait, if you two are good now…”

Eddie doesn’t want her to ask what she’s about to ask, because the answer might be more embarrassing than all of his other Steve stories combined.

“Why are you still going on about quitting?”

Eddie drops his face into his hands, feeling totally and utterly pathetic. “Um, because I think I’m sort of, kind of, just a little bit…in love with him?”

-------------------------------------

tbh I didn’t think I’d be writing a second part, but if strangers on the internet validate me enough, I guess I’ll do anything~

Y’ALL. I’m blown away by the response to part one of this silly lil au. I didn’t reply to any of the lovely comments or tags, but please know if you engaged in any way (or even if you just read the fic and snorted a little through your nose at a bit you found funny) I love you with my entire heart and you’ve made my entire life.

[Now for the tag list, which I’ve never done before. Sorry if you didn’t actually want to be on here! Or, sorry if you’re stumbling upon this post on your own after asking to be tagged and I missed you oops.]

@messrs-weasley @n0-1-important @bornonthesavage @thing-a-ling @eddiemunsonswife @changenamelater @ispyblu @thesuninyaface

@invisibleflame812 @4nemo1egend @ikolanatari @mavernanche @songbird-garden @trashpocket @original-cypher @over7joyed 

@commonxsenss @justdyingontheinside @mojowitchcraft @maya-custodios-dionach @justmiiriam @imzadidragonfly @lillemilly @gay-stranger-things @child-of-cthulhu @bleedingoptimism @lemanzanabizarra @melaniehere91

@iswearitsjustme @silver-snaffles @csinnamon-fox @paint-music-with-me @epicsteddieficrecs @sweetcreaturetm @hxneyfarms @bossyknow-it-all @vecnuthy @stevethehairington @anything-thats-rock-and-roll @nburkhardt

@gayngerthings @patchworkgargoyle @violetsteve @henderdads @2btheanswertothequestion

[cherlockgomes]

Uncle Rick: Beloved Children's Author Turned Capitalist Sellout

TW: Controversial opinion.

Discussing the show and the new Percy Jackson novel.

Welcome to my rant about the way the PJO universe is going. First of all- the show. Yes, a lot of people (not excluding me) were upset about the casting. I loved the picture I had in my head of Annabeth and Percy, Luke and Grover, etc. However, the arguments made on behalf of the casting- how they look isn't crucial to their story like how Hazel's might be, and how Rick Riordan assured us they were perfect for their roles because they fully embody them, made sense. I realized I was still wrapped up in the 5th-grade mindset that was clinging to the concept of a character that had nothing to do with their essence. Thus, I was convinced to approach the show with an open mind.

After watching all the interviews leading up to the show, I was convinced. These three fully embodied their characters. I could see Percy in Walker's sarcastic wit, Annabeth in Leah's demeanour, and Grover in Aryan's chemistry. My inner child was excited for a book to screen redemption of one of my favourite series.

It had the premise for a great show—a good cast, the author working closely, and what seemed to be a good set design. How miserably it failed. It was so...soulless. There's no other way to put it. It lacked depth and the magic that made the books so special. They rushed through the scenes, not giving the actors enough time to shine. I'd describe it as spreading their light too thin, making everything flat and one-dimensional.

Take the scene where Percy gets claimed, for example. In the books, it was this paramount moment where the entire camp, including people like Clarrise, were forced to bow down to him- showcasing how powerful he was. Even a person like Annabeth, who was supposed to hate any of Poseidon's descendants because of their parental fued had to bow, showing how the Olympian hierarchy forced you to show your respect. It was the moment Luke saw Percy's potential.

Now, in the show, this moment seemed to be brushed past. Yes, it was there, but as I mentioned, it lacked depth. Walker looked tiny when he was meant to tower over them.

This brings me to my other point. Recently, Riordan released a book called Percy Jackson and The Chalice of Gods. It was meant to show Percy, Annabeth and Grover as college students and their lives after the battle. But, like the show, it lacked that magic. Moreover, it felt like the characters were merely half-baked. Yes, their original characteristics were there, but it felt like they hadn't grown. They were meant to be in college, but it felt like they were just entering high school. Certain places felt redundant and average.

I couldn't help but feel disappointed by the show. What was meant to be a redemption felt like a broken promise. Conversely, the book felt like a cash grab playing on our nostalgia, disguised by a fun quest with the original three. It's only a step up from what Disney accomplishes with their live-action remakes. Not to mention, it feels very JK Rowling-coded.

Not cool.

[amber-lucca44]

Couldn't sleep and was bored, and kinda hate Drake so um

Drake's biggest fuckups I've caught on this beef

He loves trying to diss Kendrick for his height. Yk like a toddler would.

He tries to say Kendrick's Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers was a bad album. If we're talking critical reviews, it had a Metacritic rating of 85/100, compared to Drake's highest ever rating of 79/100 for Nothing Was The Same. In fact, Kendrick's lowest Metacritic score so far has been 80/100 for Section.80, again over Drake's highest.

...and if we're talking sales or streams, well first, no one ever challenged Drake's sales compared to Kendrick. I think we all know Drake is pretty much unmatched when it comes to that. Second, if sales were a factor to determine quality of music, then holy shit "Despacito" must be an all time magnum opus like nothing anyone ever heard before lol.

Trying to call Kendrick a sellout for doing songs with Maroon 5 and Taylor Swift? Drake calling someone else a sellout? 🤡🤡🤡

The line where he said Kendrick isn't on the big three because SZA, Travis Scott and 21 Savage "got him wiped down". Okay, first, I'm pretty sure this guy thinks big three means just "the three best selling" and uhhh no not quite. And second, and most obvious, SZA? SZA isn't even a rapper, why are you trying to bring her into this? 🙄

The AI to imitate 2Pac's and Snoop's voices. A few points here. First of all, the fucking disrespect to 2Pac, what the fuck. Glad Pac's family threatened him to remove it. Second, Snoop Dogg is alive. You just used his AI voice cause you know damn well he wouldn't be caught dead doing a verse on a Kendrick diss for you. And as a third point, it's just funny you felt like you had to use AI to make a diss track. Ghostwriters weren't enough for this one ig lol.

"Taylor Made Freestyle" was all just him begging on his hands and knees for Kendrick to reply something and give him some attention. Drake took almost a month replying to Kendrick's verse on "Like That". And he's begging for a response to "Push Ups" like a week after it was leaked (and the same day it was even officially released in the first place)

He tried to say the things Kendrick would diss him with. He was mostly right but oh boy did Kendrick do so much more.

Is he a Swiftie too? Cause he wouldn't let her go for "Taylor Made". In his mind, he swears Kendrick wasn't dropping a diss cause he didn't want to interrupt Taylor Swift's album's success, which is just a funny and dumb conclusion to make.

Spends the end of that track just talking, trying to praise Taylor for "managing Kendrick's schedule". 🤡

Drake beginning "Family Matters" with an n word and then going "yeah I said it I know that you mad" really came off sounding like when 12 year olds play online and say the word to seem tough. 😂

"Always rapping like you trying to get the slaves freed". Dang so making songs that actually have substance and meaning means you wanna free slaves, okay.

About these next lines...

Kendrick said he hated the girls you fuck referring to your dumbass being a pedo and hated you trying to hook up with underage girls. Not at any point did he say anything about their color tf.

"I've been with black and white and everything that's in between" okay so all underage girls okay got it. Again that was never the point. 😐

"You the black messiah wifin' up a mixed queen" Drake seriously missed the whole entire fucking point. Kendrick never said he didn't like you for hooking up with white women, what the fuck. And again the messiah thing is just funny.

He mentioned Whitney on "Push Ups", and some gave him the benefit of the doubt thinking he might have just done some wordplay about Whitney Houston being called the same as Kendrick's wife, wasn't clear enough. But these lyrics here are what made it abundantly clear he did want to try to mess with his family. I'm sorry but at this point that's not a rap beef, you intentionally tried to make it personal. Maybe you knew you never had a chance so you thought going there would make it possible to win? As if you didn't have a horrible fucking record already.

"Why you never hold your son and tell him 'say cheese'?" Maybe he doesn't want to expose him too much to the public while he raises him, decent human beings would understand that.

"We could've left the kids out of this, don't blame me" Kendrick said you don't know shit about raising a child based on information that was already abundantly public (see "The Story Of Addidon") and also based on the fact that you, despite having that child, love playing tough on IG and dropping disses using AI begging Kendrick to reply. Trying to get Kendrick's children involved is totally on you, buddy. Kendrick wasn't the one dealing with being exposed with having a child no one knew about and you wouldn't acknowledge.

He loves baselessly claiming that one of Kendrick's children isn't his. Again, baselessly, so literally just gossip lol.

And speaking of baseless stuff, he's really keeps running on his claim that Kendrick has beaten his wife. THERE IS NO EVIDENCE OF THIS. Like at all. In his mind, he probably thinks that since his easily provable bullshit was exposed, he'll try to invent some bs on Kendrick too to make it seem like they're both horrible people. The only piece of shit we know of in this beef is you, Drake.

Not at Kendrick but in a diss aimed at The Weeknd, Drake had to pull out his homophobic card. Disgusting. Fuck, it's so easy to dislike this guy. 🙄

Saying that Kendrick's music only "hitting hard" when Baby Keem writes on it. Is it cause he has writing credits on "N95"? He does ad libs on the song so I'm pretty sure that's why he's listed. Are the ad libs that fire? Lol

"Kendrick just opened his mouth, somebody go hand him a Grammy right now" awww he jealous bout Kendrick's Grammy's lol 🥺

He brought up Kendrick's transgender uncle, and was transphobic to try to diss Kendrick. Just plain ignorant and disgusting as hell. But of course he did. 😑🙄

Tried to blame Kendrick for 2Pac's family threatening legal action for his "Taylor Made Freestyle". Bro what you did was plain disrespectful and it was just bound to happen.

Did he really try to brag about the video leaked of him masturbating? 🤡🤡🤡

And this nonsense right here, was it cause he visited Ghana or something? He's trying to pin Kendrick as a racist? Huh?

...and follows this up with an ignorant, racist, weird ass comment dissing Michael Jackson too for no reason whatsoever. 🤡

Talking to the mirror here lol

Naming his diss track "The Heart part 6" was almost clever. Except for the fact that yk the song is fucking trash.

The first line on this song calls Kendrick "the Pulitzer Prize winner". Yeah pointing out an accolade as amazing as that one at the beginning of a diss towards him will definitely do it. 😀

Having a comment by Dave Free as the cover for the single. Is this his evidence for a kid being his? 😂

Saying you "plotted to give Kendrick information" doesn't even help you much when it's all easily believable based on your background lol.

Denying the child Kendrick is exposing him to have, again, doesn't help your case at all after Adonis.

Goes back to saying Kendrick beat his wife and one of his children is not his, again with no evidence or hint whatsoever, only to go and say he's all about "facts". 🤡

Okay so, be careful everyone, don't leave heart emojis to any child or baby post ever, cause Drake is going to think you're the father.

Why is he even bringing up Kendrick's confessions on "Mother I Sober"? How is bringing up a traumatic potential sexual abuse incident a good way to dodge your own sexual abuse allegations? And that's not even exactly what Kendrick said on the fucking song! It's just disgusting.

And then tries to ridicule Kendrick for being a victim of this. What the fuck is wrong with this mf.

Okay and this one is just cringe. He tried to spin Kendrick's jab on "Not Like Us". B sharp isn't even a thing btw. 😂😂🤡

"I'd never look twice at no teenager" there is literally video of you kissing a teenager on stage, for starters. So you just look at them once before you creep on them how does that work

"Only fucking with Whitney" ah yes the old "I'll fuck your bitch" trope very clever and original Drake

Drake believing some bullshit he saw around about Kendrick using bots to boost his view count is just hilarious. He really thinks Kenny sat down and took some time to actually do that. 😂😂

He thinks people will cancel Kendrick over his baseless battery accusations. 🤡

He ends it with another minute rant like the one he did on "Taylor Made", and starts by saying the beef was "some good exercise". Ngl it is the first time I hear Drake rap at all in a while. So yeah gotta thank Kendrick for getting Drake to actually TRY to do some good music at all. (It's not even good but yk better than whatever trash he was doing before the beef)

"Just let me know when we getting to the facts, everything in my shit is facts" *doubles down on baseless claims of battery and one of Kendrick's children not being his*

[hazelnut-u-out]

Just coincidentally, I was talking to @dirty-bear-rick-sanchez, and he mentioned the fact that Evil Morty had a ‘Chekov’s Gun’. As soon as I saw the words, my brain immediately made some connections based on the events of ‘Rickmurai Jack’, ‘Full Meta Jackrick’, and ‘Unmortricken.’ 

First of all, I remembered making this post about the metaverse goggles in ‘Full Meta Jackrick.’ In the post, I was talking more about the device labeled ‘Foreshadowing’, which I thought could potentially show up in the future and make the glimpse we get of it in that episode a fun easter egg. Now, my focus is on how the devices and their labels coincide with the events of ‘Unmortricken.’ 

Let’s look at the Devices pictured: 

We have Checkov’s Guns, Foreshadowing, Ticking Clock, and Action Enhancer. (There are other devices that can be seen in the scene that are difficult to read. The one in the corner is labeled ‘Gratuitous Violence’.) Thinking about the events that took place in the Prime fight, these things may have come into play. While we didn’t see the exact Foreshadowing device pictured used in the fight, it did pique my interest that the device seems to be pointed at the Chekov’s Guns display. The Ticking Clock being placed above the Foreshadowing device also made me realize just how much that parallels the use of the Omega Device as it’s shown in ‘Unmortricken’.  Think about it… The reveal of the Omega Device is already being used as a method of Foreshadowing, Slow Mobius was lowered into the Omega Device from above while using his powers to slow the moment down (hence, Ticking Clock being a device used to create suspense), and at the end– when handed over to Evil Morty– the schematics become a Chekov’s Gun with a promise to return. Their placements parallel the events of the fight scene, even down to the blatant Gratuitous Violence! (I’ll admit, I don’t have an obvious placement for Action Enhancer yet, unless you count the Kill Bot drones/giant Diane Bots… I guess Evil Morty does ride one like a motorcycle!)

You don't show an Omega Device without erasing someone important to the audience from infinity, if you know what I mean.

I was having a lot of thoughts, and some of these branched off into different connections about Evil Morty and his exit, especially with the previous assumption/symbolism in mind. He looks at Rick and says the following: 

2 things I thought of:

1.) This feels like a threat, not just an exit.  It makes a lot of sense to interpret this as a future promise of betrayal. The fact that Evil Morty has to remind Morty Prime that they’re not friends makes me think he could come back to specifically stab Morty Prime (or Mortys) in the back, especially since he tends to dislike ‘sellout’ Mortys. Saying he could ‘use’ Rick for being ‘different’ makes me wonder if ‘ending the Rick Experiment’ could be synonymous with putting himself or another Morty in the Omega Device and eliminating the toxic relationship between Ricks and Mortys for good. Does acknowledging Rick is ‘different’ and useful imply that Evil Morty could use another life for leverage using the Omega Device in the future to get C-137 to do what he wants? (Not sure he’d erase himself since he references the vengeful Summers thing, but who knows?)

The events of ‘Full Meta Jackrick’ support this sub-theory, as well. Another post I made after the airing of ‘Full Meta Jackrick’ (here) talked about how I suspected Mr. Twist’s interaction with Morty (where he acknowledges Morty is the plot twist) might have actual weight to it.

If you remember, one of the BIG moments of ‘Full Meta Jackrick’ was this one right here: 

I think Rick emphasizing the importance of Morty’s existence is major foreshadowing. Not to mention, Rick tries to ban Morty from accompanying him to the Prime fight. More acknowledgment that Morty is very important to Rick. Being able to tie all of these elements back to a single episode AND Evil Morty’s arc would work quite well in terms of storytelling. 

2.) What is the ‘Rick Experiment’? I think that the Rick Experiment might just be Morty’s existence. Especially since we know our Rick was a founding father of the Citadel/Curve, it seems plausible that Mortys would be the central ‘Rick Experiment’ (created to be the perfect sidekick; obey them; keep them company; hide their brain waves; prove they could create life across infinity when the Omega Device can destroy it; and– for C-137 and others– there’s the added benefit in the search for Prime). I’ve even wondered who Ricks are trying to hide their brainwaves from while on the CFC, and I think that who might’ve been Prime. This theory would explain why Rick is holding Morty so triumphantly in that photo in Birdperson’s house in ‘Get Schwifty’ AND how Rick knew a Morty baby in general. 

We have to keep in mind that Evil Morty not only told our Morty about the Morty Trade in the first place, but also that he's probably the most knowledgeable (outside of C-137 or what's left of the Council) about the Morty Trade/ Rick Experiment in general, whatever that turns out to be.

This was essentially me throwing theories at a wall to see what sticks, so all of this could be nothing! Just some big food for thought, lol.

[britt-kageryuu]

A video is uploaded onto the VTurtles! Clips Channel. 💜🐉🐲

----------------

It opens with an animated version of Purple Wyverns' model (Kendra).

"So, I was a bit bored after finishing up some projects so I went through a number of VODs to look for the various Cups and Mugs the Turtles use on stream." Kendra explains while showing a picture of a Tumbler that reads 'With a Great Workload, Comes a Great Amount of Coffee!'. "I actually asked Dee about this, they don't really own hundreds of cups, just alot of temporary graphics, put onto a few different styles of cup."

"Anyway, this is a compilation of clips featuring some of the more interesting one I found!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Donnie and Leo are playing a game, and Donnie pauses to drink from a cup that reads 'Blood of My Enemies!'.

Leo looks at the cup, "How is that filled with the blood of your enemies, when the drink is green?"

Donnie without missing a beat answers, "Aliens. Keep up Blue. Besides yours says 'Hater Tears'!"

××××××××××××

Leo is casually taking a sip from a cup that reads, 'You better Be-Leaf, I'm Feeling Tea-rrific!', "Gotta love that Stealthily Strawberry blend. Yes, I will plug our personal Coffee and Tea Company the Caffeinated Turtle. Yes I will act like a sellout."

+++++++++++

The boys are all together doing some exercises, and in the foreground close to the camera is 4 color-coded cups each with a anime style character. They resemble Waifu Cups.

Red has Star/Mona Lisa, Blue has Usagi, Orange has a version of Spider-man, and Purple has Atomic Lass.

÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷

Mikey is doing some street art on a large canvas. On the canvas is what looks like Spider-Man but he has paint splattered pants, and jacket. And there's letter art that reads Painted Spider.

He steps back to take off his custom respirator mask, to take a drink from a tumbler labeled 'Definitely Not The Paint Water!' that has a fake paintbrush glued to the rim.

===========

Raph walks through the frame behind Donnie taking a drink from a very large bottle that has 'Pre-Workout Hydration!' written on it.

Donnie doesn't notice, but there are some confused messages in the chat.

<><><><><><>

Leo and Donnie are in sync drinking from cups that read, Leo: I got the Beauty, Donnie: I got the Brains.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Donnie is chatting about the coffee blend he was testing, and lifts a mug that reads 'My Body is 87% Coffee', "We think this blend might be too close to a unsafe level of caffeine, but that's why the placeholder name is 'A Cup with Death'."

____________

A Clip from a Merch promotion that featured some Cups with different graphics.

1: 'Hydrate Like A Boss', 2: 'I Will Bite Before, and After My First Cup' , 3: A Cartoon Slider drinking from a Japanese Tea Mug, and 4: A Cartoon Box Turtle holding a paintbrush and the cup is splattered with paint.

**************

Leo is chatting to the audience while holding a mug that says 'Hot Soup!' with a cartoon Lou Jitsu. "And then he said 'When will you give me Grandchildren?' Like Pops, we haven't gotten passed 2nd Base!"

--------------

Masterpost

Not the most original idea, but I thought it was funny.

[wasawattpadkid]

this might not make sense but I absolutely love your billy and Stu playlist. Could you maybe write a couple headcannons on which songs they like and why? You could include the reader or not it's up to you thanks Maddy!❤️‍🔥

I think I get what you're asking. I hope you like it!💕

Billy's playlist

Stu's playlist

Billy

1.) 1979 by The Smashing Pumpkins

This is Billy's favorite song I don't make the rules. Smashing Pumpkins is one of his favorite bands. The song reminds him of a time he was happy. He listens to music like it'd play in a movie about his life. This would play while a montage of him and Stu flickered on the silver screen.

2.) The Killing Moon by Echo & the Bunny Men

This song always finds its way onto his mixtapes. It makes him think of how love can happen to anyone even if they pray it doesn't. He equates love with death just because you have no control over when and where it happens.

3.) A Day In The Life by The Beatles

A Beatles song amidst alternative rock is definitely a little jarring. Billy actually enjoys the Beatles. It was his mother's favorite band. He grew up listening to the Sgt Peppers album on repeat. She'd sing song after song to him trying to get him to sleep. This song reminds him of simpler times.

4.) How Soon Is Now? by The Smiths

Billy's a Smiths fan. He puts music on just to brood over his life. The man thinks he has better music taste than everyone else he knows. Stu likes to make fun of Billy's music taste. "Damn does that shit come with razor blades?"

5.) Mama I'm Coming Home by Ozzy Osbourne

Mommy issues. Likes to play music he knows that'll make him cry. He thinks if he makes himself cry in private he'll be less likely to accidentally cry around anyone.

6.) It's The End Of The World As We Know It by R.E.M

Stu knows all the words to We Didn't Start The Fire by Billy Joel. Billy thinks he's a dork because of this. Yet in the privacy of his car, he will sing every single word of this song.

7.) Every Breath You Take by The Police

Told a girl he related to this song on a first date. He's still not sure why she stopped talking to him. Billy still thinks it's a romantic song.

8.) Goodbye Horses by Q Lazzarus

Only knows the song because of Silence of the Lambs. Will start dancing to this song if he's been drinking.

9.) Flesh For Fantasy by Billy Idol

Remember how I said he thinks about where a song would fit in a movie about his life? This would play while he's kissing down your chest. His movie wouldn't have a full sex scene he's not a sellout. More like a montage of kissing and soft moans. It would be frustrating to watch for people like me and you.

10.) A Girl Like You by Edwyn Collins

Without wasting words he'd play you this song hoping you'd understand how he felt about you. Billy was odd like that. He obsessed over lyrics and a song's meaning. When he realized he had a crush on you he immediately started making a list of songs that reminded him of you. They could put his emotions into words when he couldn't.

Stu

1.) In The Meantime by Spacehog

Stu loves music. He doesn't care about lyrics although they can make a song better. If he likes instruments he'll buy the album. Will buy a whole album for one song. This is one example. Stu doesn't like what he calls "sad bastard music." You will rarely catch him listening to music he knows will bum him out.

2.) Blood Makes Noise by Suzanne Vega

This song itches his brain every time he listens to it. Stu is odd. He likes rock but if there's too much going on it freaks him out. Not one for screamo makes him feel like he's being yelled at. This song is on his sex playlist do what you will with that information.

3.) Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana

Nirvana fan first human second. He has a crush on Kurt Cobain. Hates Cortney Love like she's Yoko Ono. Stu likes to learn about bands and artists' personal lives. He's nosey. "Can you believe that shit? I'd treat them so much better." Stu would rant to his friend about a random celebrity making Billy want to drink Draino.

4.) Paradise By the Dashboard Light by Meatloaf

He thinks the song is hilarious. Will perform the 8-minute-long song at karaoke. There will be an empty room once he's done. He doesn't regret his actions.

5.) A.D.I.D.A.S by Korn

It was your fault. You picked out the movie Say Anything and made him watch it. You woke up at 3 in the morning to Stu loudly blasting this song outside of your house. Not only was it funny it was romantic to him. Cops were called.

6.) I Was Made For Lovin' You by KISS

This is one of Stu's favorite songs. When he was little he was obsessed with KISS. He'd put on a full face of face paint and he'd stain his tongue and hands with red food coloring. The boy would run around the house singing and dancing. To his parents, however, Stu's unserious habit of playing with makeup wasn't something they were proud of. His music taste is all over the place because he constantly went through different phases trying to figure out what he could do to please his parents. Nothing ever did.

7.) Peaches by The Presidents of the United States

If you write a song that sounds good and had some goofy ass lyrics Stu's sold. Stu will sing this every time the school lunch consists of peaches. Billy has thrown several trying to get his friend to shut up.

8.) Iron Man by Black Sabbath

Stu loves to stir up shit and have arguments. He was actually on the debate team for his freshman and sophomore years of high school. Billy thinks Ozzy Osbourne is better alone than with Black Sabbath. Every time this is brought up Stu acts like a little piece of him dies. Plus when this song comes on the radio Stu likes to cover his mouth imitating the voice at the beginning. It's where they got the whole ghostface voice idea from.

9.) Fight For Your Right by Bestie Boys

Stu is a huge fan of The Beastie Boys. Their first record is a go-to when there's a party at his is. Of course, this is his favorite song of theirs. The amount of times that man has bounced around an empty house blasting that band is almost worrying.

10.) Psycho Killer by The Talking Heads.

Best for last. If Stu had a theme song this would be it. In his movie, it'd play as he's running around as Ghostface. He has a lot of energy so he loves to chase people. Randy called him an "evil golden retriever" once and Stu likes the comparison.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael in the Mainstream: Top 100 Movies #100 - #76

For the longest time I've wanted to do something like this, but I never could find the right time to do it. It just seemed so daunting, and the website's image limit was a hindrance, and then my computer died and my wife's computer was all I could use... and then I went on my hiatus from doing major reviews. But I found some time, so here we go.

These are my hundred favorite films ever made, divided into fourths so each one can get an image and I can devote more time to gushing about them if I want to without feeling like I'm dragging things out.

Speaking if dragging things out, let us waste no more time! We have a hundred movies to go, so let's knock out the botom quarter!

100. Us

Jordan Peele’s sophomore effort gets a lot of shit that I feel is mostly undeserved. Sure, some of the over explaining at the climax is a bit clunky when taken at face value, but it almost feels like it’s by design, as if the movie is daring you to nitpick the premise so that you can ignore the message it’s trying to convey. For me, I find that the stellar themes, fantastic acting, and godly soundtrack manage to make up for any of this movie’s flaws.

99. Crimson Peak

Murder! Mystery! Ghosts! Incest! Leave it to Guillermo del Toro to craft a Gothic horror film this stylish and impressive! This might just be my favorite of his films, and I definitely think it is severely overlooked compared to the rest of his output.

98. Mandy

Nicolas Cage is one of my favorite actors of all time, because when he goes crazy it’s always fun, and when he’s dramatic he genuinely kills it. This film lets him do both,with the first half being a slow burn dramatic romance that ends in horrific tragedy, and the back half having him do demon drugs and get into a chainsaw duel while he murders an entire cult. Truly a beautifully insane film.

97. Scream

The film that both revitalized and ruined the slasher genre, with winking nods to the tropes that made those films what they are while also playing things just straight enough to be appealing. Only a genre master like Wes Craven could pull off a pitch-perfect satire like this, though none of it would be near as good if it didn’t have a great cast who were firing on all cylinders. Young Neve Campbell before she became a sellout, Matthew Lillard cementing his place in horror history, David Arquette and Courtney Cox in their prime, and Roger “Mojo Jojo” Jackson playing the iconic voice of Ghostface… They’re as crucial to this movie’s success as the meta winks and impressive kills are.

96. Jojo Rabbit

Taika Waititi made one bad superhero movie and then everyone turned on him as if he didn’t make the film that proves you absolutely could make Blazing Saddles in this day and age. While it’s neither as gut-bustingly funny nor as profane as Mel Brooks’ magnum opus, it’s still a very fun, funny, and heartbreaking satirization of Nazism. I think he’s allowed to make one Love and Thunder when he made something this good.

95. Akira

The movie with the coolest bike slide in cinematic history, and this is indisputable because every single movie and show with motorcycles in it borrowed that cool bike slide. This film does show its age a bit, but it’s still an awesome sci-fi showcase of animated action and body horror. Plus it’s just a lot of fun seeing Tetsuo and Kaneda spend at least half of their dialogue dramatically screaming each other’s names.

94. 300

I make fun of Zack Snyder a lot, but I do it out of love; the dude who made 300 has gotta be capable of doing better than his recent output, after all. Stylish, slick action and slow-mo put to good use showing an army of nearly naked macho men cutting down hordes of nasty bad guys… The fact I watched this movie so much as a teenager should’ve been the first hint I was bisexual.

93. Spider-Man: No Way Home

People are really fucking hard on the MCU Spidey, and not without reason, but sometimes it really comes off as disingenuous. Look at this film, for instance; it has gotten some flak for just being a cheap nostalgia circlejerk that uses cameos so you can clap and cheer and ignore the ‘plot holes.’ I cannot imagine being that miserable of a movie watcher. To me, this film is a tribute to the cinematic Spideys that came before while giving them some degree of closure that I never thought I’d see, while simultaneously bringing Holland’s take on the character closer to where he should be. It’s also really hard to hate a movie where Willem Dafoe gets to go Goblin Mode again and power bomb Tom Holland through several floors of an apartment, cementing him as comic book movie villain royalty once and for all. Are there cheesy moments, moments where things don’t make the most sense? Sure. But to focus on those bits instead of the core themes and how the characters are used is an awful way t do film criticism. The returning heroes and most of the returning villains are used very effectively to tell the story they wanted to tell, and most importantly they don’t overshadow Tom and his friends. The fact he stands toe-to-toe with Tobey Maguire and Andrew Garfield is nothing short of amazing, spectacular even.

92. The Lost Boys

Joel Schumacher died with one of the most unfairly earned infamous reputations around. Man made one campy superhero movie where you can see George Clooney’s nips and hear Arnold Schwarzenegger make ice puns and suddenly everyone forgets he made one of the greatest and most homoerotic vampire films ever made. While the stuff with the kids is very hit or miss, the stuff with David and his vampire biker gang is awesome, and the climax is one hell of a good time.

91. Barbie

Want to introduce your kids to feminist concepts but really don’t think they’re ready for Poor Things? Greta Gerwig has got you covered, with this pink-hued intro to feminism that uses the world’s most popular doll in a meta-narrative about her impact as well as what it means to be a woman and how the patriarchy is detrimental to both men and women. Margot Robbie gives a great performance as the titular heroine, but it is Ryan Gosling as the well-meaning idiot turned antagonist Ken that steals the show. It helps that he sings one of the most incredible, sincere power ballads ever written.

90. Street Fighter

As a connoisseur of cheesy, “so bad it’s good” films, quite a few of them have made my top 100. Here’s the first of those, this goofy Saturday morning cartoon of a film where the most American character ever (Guile) is played by the least American guy imaginable (Jean-Claude Van Damme). While it undeniably fumbles a lot of the cast of the game it’s adapting, Chun-Li and especially M. Bison are done so well it’s hard to be too mad. It’s a fun, stupid, silly 90s action film and sometimes that’s all I need.

89. Knives Out

After polarizing sci-fi audiences with his Star Wars film, Rian Johnson subverted our expectations by delivering a whodunnit for the ages. After seeing them restrained by blockbuster franchises for the better part of a decade, seeing Daniel Craig and Chris Evans really let loose again is a real treat.

88. Everything Everywhere All at Once

Twitter tries to convince me every other week that this movie is dogshit, but I ain’t buying it. This is one of the best uses of the multiverse in recent memory, using it to tell a stylish, silly, and heartfelt story about family and trauma. The entire cast is amazing, but it’s Ke Huy Quan in his big return to the silver screen that really steals the show.

87. The Texas Chain Saw Massacre

My favorite thing about this movie, this proto-slasher, is just how fucking unclean it makes me feel. It’s not overly violent or gory, but it is genuinely grimy and unsettling in a way few other horror films can match. The dinner scene near the end in particular is just so fucking unnerving. Just truly unmatched atmosphere with this movie.

86. Spaceballs

While I’m not going to argue that this is a better film than Blazing Saddles, I still enjoy it a lot more since I’m a bigger fan of Star Wars and sci-fi than I am of Westerns. It’s just a damn funny parody, and hoe can it not when it has some of the funniest people to ever live (Mel Brooks, Joan Rivers, Rick Moranis, John Candy) and a great heroic lead performance from Bill Pullman all delivering some of the silliest lines ever written?

85. RRR

This is basically live action historical fiction anime. These characters pull off some of the most insane feats of action I have ever seen, action that makes the average American action film look like Peppa Pig. But I would not give a shit if there wasn’t a strong emotional core; the two leads have a brotherly bond unlike anything I’ve ever, and it makes the action that much sweeter. Frankly, this movie would make the list just for the final battle alone, since it might be my favorite action scene of all time.

84. Strange Magic

This movie holds a very special place in my heart. I went to see this with my wife back when we first started dating, and at the time I was filled with anxiety and insecurity, worried that I wasn’t good enough and didn’t deserve a relationship among other things. I sat down to watch this, and when it got to the titular song, something clicked, and I felt secure. I felt like our relationship was the right thing, and all these years later it’s hard to deny I was right. So thank you to this cheesy jukebox musical inspired by Shakespeare and George Lucas’ desire to make a film for little girls. They will never convince me you’re a bad movie.

83. Princess Mononoke

Maybe Miyazaki’s Spirited Away is objectively better, but this is my favorite. I think it’s because this one is a lot more excitin and action-packed, with all sorts of thrilling setpieces interspersed with the quieter dramatic moments Miyazaki excels at.

82. Jurassic Park

One of Spielberg’s greatest achievements is bringing dinosaurs to life on the big screen. No matter how many times I sit down to watch this, I still feel the same awe the characters do when they lay their eyes on the dinosaurs—which really highlights how good the cast is, because they’re amazingly convincing even when they’re looking at dated 90s CGI.

81. Labyrinth

It’s David Bowie starring as the villain in a musical filled with puppets that’s directed by Jim Henson. How the fuck is it possible to not love this movie?

80. V for Vendetta

Yes, this does dumb down the politics of Alan Moore’s comic significantly and turns the story into a much more straightforward plot. But what it lacks in depth, it makes up for with Hugo Weaving and pyrotechnics. And it’s not like there’s no depth here; crucially, this film keeps the entirety of the prisoner’s letter sequence. If that was left out, I would not have liked this movie at all.

79. Wreck-It Ralph

It’s amazing how much Disney got right here that it would go on to get wrong over the next decade. We have a hidden twist villain, something that hampered later films… but he’s shown to be a dick, with the villain reveal being how evil he is. It’s a big crossover of nostalgic properties… but they’re more used as seasoning for a story about original characters. It’s just astonishing how Disney would end up dropping the ball, even in this film’s sequel, when they got everything right the first time.

78. Sin City

What’s black and white and red all over? This bloody brilliant adaptation of Frank Miller’s sleazy comics (and one of the last genuinely good things with his name attached to it). The visual style here is the real big selling point; it genuinely looks like the pages of a comic come to life. While the movie as a whole is fantastic and “The Big Fat Kill” segment is still really, “The Hard Goodbye” and “That Yellow Bastard” are the real highlights, the former because of a career highlight performance from Mickey Rourke and a terrifying villain turn from Elijah Wood of all people, the latter because of one of Bruce Willis’ finest performances of the 2000s and excellent use of slight splashes of color (yellow for the titular bastard).

77. Batman & Robin

As long as I live, this movie will have at least one defender. Joel Schumacher created a silly, campy comic book movie for the ages, and maybe back in the day people weren’t read for it… but I was. I love the ice puns, the nipples, the bat credit card, all of it! All of its silly, stupid corniness makes this as memorable as it is! It’s like the West show with a gigantic budget.

76. The Rocky Horror Picture Show

And speaking of camp, here is the cult classic. We can argue all day and all night whether this film has aged badly, but this was a huge step forward for queer cinema on top of being a damn good musical. If nothing else, this movie helped rocket Tim Curry into the stratosphere and made him the star we know him as.

[mariacallous]

In the late 1990s and early 2000s Christopher Hitchens was the most famous journalist in the English-speaking world. I loved him and was proud to count him as a friend. Yet after his death, it is hard to know what to make of his writing. You can gasp at his learning and his style – he loved the English language and it loved him back. But as a source of inspiration? History has not, apparently, been kind to Hitch.

For readers to know where they stand, writers must be consistent. George Orwell, whom Christopher idolised, was a revolutionary socialist in the 1930s when he served with the POUM militia in the Spanish civil war. He had moderated to become a supporter of the Labour party by the time he wrote Animal Farm and 1984 in the 1940s.But he remained a left-winger. An English nationalist version of a left-winger, to be sure, but a man of the left nevertheless.

By contrast, Hitch was all over the place. In his youth he was a Marxist revolutionary, in theory at any rate. He was a comrade of Perry Anderson, Tariq Ali and other upper-class Marxists who gathered around Verso Books and the New Left Review.  He clearly believed in his version of Trotskyist socialism, but remained the strangest Marxist I have met. He had no interest in the economics of socialism. Instead, he was in love with the anti-Stalinist dissident tradition in communism that Leon Trotsky exemplified, and the Soviet state persecuted. Like so many of the 1968 generation it never seemed to occur to him that Trotsky would have been as terrible a dictator as Stalin if he had ever taken power.

In the 1990s he abandoned socialism and reconciled himself with the neoliberal order, as so many did. After 9/11, he became a neo-conservative and was convinced that radical Islam was the gravest threat to the West. His former comrades on the far left, who were themselves taking up the Islamist agenda, denounced him as an apostate.  The venom was extraordinary even by the standards of the far left. After his premature death at the age of just 62 in December 2011, his publishers Verso published a book-length attack on its own writer. As I said at the time, “the publishing house has done something I have not seen since the passing of communism: denounced its dead author for his ideological deviations.”

But with the advantage of hindsight, the people who had the most right to shrug their shoulders and forget Christopher were standard supporters of moderate left-wing politics. As I have been guilty of Christopher’s faults myself, let me spell them out.

For the Marxist half of his life Christopher was denouncing the Labour party in the UK and the Democrats in the US as sellouts. Once Labour is back in power you will see hundreds of imitators on the UK left, who will never match Christopher’s range and gusto, do the same. Like me, Hitchens was from an English journalistic culture, which is rarely comfortable with the Labour party.  The Guardian’s politics vary from liberal to post-communist, but the paper has few authentic Labour voices. It’s hardly alone in that. Not one highbrow publication, not the New Statesman or the London Review of Books, is authentically Labour. If a foreigner were to arrive and ask to be shown the UK paper that reflects Labour thinking, you would be hard pressed to offer one.

In the US, Hitchens’ most famous polemic was a dissection of the Democrat president Bill Clinton, which earned him many friends on the right. He hated Hilary Clinton with a passion and was never happier than when exposing the hypocrisies of progressives.

So what, you might say, writers must call it the way they see it, and progressive hypocrisy provides an endless source of material.

But then Christopher turned on his head and became a neo-conservative and attacked the moderate centre-left with the same venom from the right. Once again, he was saying what he believed, as all writers must. But look at Hitchens work from the point of view of the people defending moderate leftish policies in the Democrats or Labour. One minute he’s attacking the centre-left from the far-left, the next from the neo-conservative right. His position changes, his dislike of the centre-left remains.

The problem for anyone trying to assess his work in our age is not only keeping up with his U-turns. It ought to be perfectly clear that the boring centre left he despised all his life is the last best hope of Anglo-Saxon democracies. The Republican party under Trump is a threat to the American republic. Only the Democrats can save it. Meanwhile, I dare anyone to deny that the Conservative party has destroyed the UK with austerity, Brexit and Truss, and that a moderate Labour party offers our only conceivable redemption.

We have learned the hard way that our most urgent task is defensive. We need to embrace any compromise for the greater good of keeping conservatives from power. And Christopher despised compromise.

Christopher died in 2011, and could not have predicted the world of Trump and Brexit. Yet you can make the case that he offers little help to those of us trying to resist it.

Matt Yglesias said on Twitter that he thought Hitchens would have supported Trump. It was a ridiculous accusation but I think I know where it came from. Christopher was a great essayist and newspaper columnist. British comment journalism loves writers who strike an unexpected stance. The roots of the contrarianism Hitchens championed lie in the commercial calculations of cynical newspaper editors that the best way to grab readers’ attention is by shocking them.

The result is it seems today that Hitchens has few heirs among leftwing journalists. His followers are among right-wing and increasingly far-right controversialists, whose fellow travelling with Trump will destroy them as surely as the fellow travelling with Stalin destroyed the leftists of the 20th century that Orwell and Hitchens opposed.

To contest this bleak memorial for an old friend and to mark the anniversary of Christopher’s death, I interviewed Christopher’s defender, Matt Johnson, the author of the marvellous How Hitchens Can Save the Left: Rediscovering Fearless Liberalism in an Age of Counter-Enlightenment

[pegaace]

Analysis on Witch from Mercury, Colonialism, The Tempest, and Caliba(r)n

Okay I know this is my first post ever but I was tryna find somewhere to put my thoughts after seeing a bunch of people everywhere slander Caliban and why that is not it and how my boi is innocent, good actually. For qualifications I did an undergrad lit class that covered The Tempest like 2 years ago so that's fine right (apologies to my profs if I fuck any of this up)

Okay so for starters yes by now everyone knows WfM is The Tempest, Prospera is Prospero (or Prospera actually, there was a 2010 film adaptation that had the gender switch already), Aerial is Ariel, etc etc. So therefore Caliban has to be this villainous, "monstrous" creature right?

Haha no sit down cos no that would be boring. (and also kinda racist as I'll explain) Notice how in the original Prospero isn't the villain of the story, not really, he's just getting revenge for being wronged years ago and trying to ship the kids together. But if recent gwitch is any indication, Prospera truly is the villain of this story, breaking hearts and stopping at nothing to destroy the Benerit group AND earth. Now I wonder which other adaptation of The Tempest has Prospero as the big bad HMMMM :thinking:

Enter Aime Cesaire and A Tempest. Written in 1969, it deals with a lot of the more unpleasant connotations of Shakespeares play. Let me lay it all out for you. So you're saying Prospero, a white dude, comes to this island, uses his western magic to overthrow the native witch (Sycorax), wrecks the land of its magic, and then enslaves her son to do his work for him, constantly insulting his appearance and intelligence? HMMMM seems pretty sus (racist and colonial) to me.

Cesaire, writing during a time of decolonial movements throughout the world, was rightfully really mad at colonizers for forcing their way upon natives with violence, and especially with the use of language to control said populations. Caliban has also been repeatedly dehumanised through previous adaptations of Shakespeares work slowly turning him from a man into a monster, not even human. This is similar to how non-european people have constantly been treated in the past.

Now like wait... Forcing communication through a set language? Dehumanisation? Colonisation of oppressed peoples? Where have we seen that before...? HMMMM

(its almost like... permet scores and gundam technology... Calibarn being free of permet links is like Caliban refusing language...)

And here's where I see the great potential of a Gundam Caliban. Gundam is certainly no stranger to decolonial movements (shoutout to my fave Gundam ZZ and the bois in Blue team and the African liberation front) and I think having Caliban as the Gundam to finally end Spacian oppression (perhaps in a sequel idk if Suletta is getting that far after bonking her mom by the end of the season) would be a great take.

As a side note, Aerial is kinda portrayed negatively in Cesaire's work for choosing to work for Prospero in exchange for their own freedom, as kind of a sellout who makes things worse and is ultimately tricked and trapped anyways and... hey! She's in a giant coffin now and Suletta is unhappier than ever! Oops.

Also like I qrted this on my twt but like its important to remember that Caliban is human too, and will respond to accordingly. They (and this might be where i disagree with @adracat a lil on their otherwise excellent posts) arent just a violent unthinking monster, thats just unfortunately how racism often portrays people of colour. If Suletta shows compassion and humanity towards Calibarn, like how she did to Aerial, and how Eri was able to connect with Lfrith in the prologue when Vanadis had failed, I'm sure she'll be able to bring Calibarn over to her side. And because they can connect so fully via human emotions and love (this is where I do agree with adra that love is the answer and key to open the door) (wooo yeah another love powered robot!! G Gundamming time) I dont think Quiet Zero will be able to stop them, as Suletta will have made the ultimate, unmediated connection between woman and machine, becoming one with it in the way Cardo Nabo had always truly hoped for. To don Gundam and live in space.

Okay sorry for the disorganised post but like one last thing I know I said it'd be nice for Calibarn to show up again in S2 but the other theory I have (which might or might not be true cos lets be real gwitch only rhymes, never copies, and i dont even know where schwarzette fits into all this [goatmom gundam my beloved i miss schwarzletta theory still]) is that the ending of A Tempest has Prospero send the girlies off as usual, but then still choose to stay on the island to fight with Caliban forever, till he can finally fully dominate him, cos racists are shit like that. This continues for a rlly long time cos his magics kinda prevent him from just dying of old age and he lives on, like a vampire sucking life from the island (wow capitalism huh) and its implied he and Caliban are just locked in this long struggle to the death until the day he finally croaks and the colonized can finally be free. Now what other gundam has an eternal struggle with fascism hmm?

idk just thought it might be cool for the gundam sisters to push suletta out of the way (maybe out of quiet zero?) whilst trapping prosperas grudge within it for all time, that would also be dramatic and neat lol. Come to think of it if Prospera does it itd be like ZZ again too lol with Haman pushing Judau away.

[skaruresonic]

In isolation, this looks like Eggman is saying "omg Grandpa would never."

In context... he's saying something different. "For Black Doom?" is really the sticking point for him, not "He betrayed his own people for research?" and I will prove why in this post.

---

First: Recall that, in SA2, Eggman read Gerald's diary. Because ShTH builds upon SA2, it's fair to assume that Eggman can only know Gerald's account of Project Shadow's development, and to assume that he considers it the authoritative account. It stands to reason that he only reason he could be shocked is if he considered Gerald's account the real one.

To wit, let us consider that Eggman has no reason to believe anyone created Shadow except Gerald.

Gerald wrote that he was able to complete the project based on his original projections.

Keep this in mind because it's important.

---

Second: Eggman rejects the idea that Gerald agreed to help Black Doom before he ever learns that Gerald agreed to give the Emeralds to BD.

Note how, after Shadow, Eggman is first to react. Note as well the strength of his reaction: his outburst is knee-jerk, his wording of "insane" bold considering Gerald's mental breakdown.

This moment suggests that something BD has said has struck a nerve within Eggman. However, because Black Doom has yet to disclose the nature of his pact with Gerald, "That's insane!" can only refer to the mere fact that Gerald decided to help Black Doom.

Why would BD's words evoke such a strong reaction if Eggman was objecting to the idea that Gerald betrayed his own people? BD didn't say Gerald had betrayed humanity at this point, nor was he implying it.

Instead, the implication behind Black Doom's words risks casting aspersion on Gerald's credibility as a scientist and Shadow's creator, which is really what Eggman is objecting to.

He is rejecting the idea that Gerald was not good enough as a scientist to finish Project Shadow on his own. The notion that Gerald took help from shady avenues and cut corners on his magnum opus conflicts his mental image of Gerald as, for lack of a better term, a Proper Robotnik(tm), a giant who stands on no one's shoulders.

For all he knew, Gerald was Shadow's sole creator. The idea that he might not have been would have shaken the foundation of everything Eggman held to be true about his grandfather.

---

Third: Eggman continues to reject the idea that Gerald agreed to "sell out" to Black Doom in order to complete Project Shadow because, according to his own account, Gerald completed Shadow on his own. Either BD or Gerald is lying, and Eggman is not inclined to believe Black Doom.

And here we come to the infamous line.

"He betrayed his own people for research?" means little in this context because there's no other line that tackles the subject or otherwise elaborates on it.

Because the meat of these cutscenes instead focuses on the shock value of Gerald striking a deal with the devil to complete his magnum opus, we can assume "For Black Doom?" means more to Eggman personally.

The issue isn't nearly so much the moral transgression; otherwise Eggman would have tut-tutted when Gerald revealed his plan to destroy the world in SA2 as well.

The issue is more personal than that. As in, are you telling me my grandfather, the greatest scientific mind of his time, is actually the kind of hack who sells out when the going gets tough? Just to finish his research?

Reading between the lines, you can probably imagine Eggman thinking, "My grandfather, a sellout? Have I clung to a lie all these years? What does that say about me?"

---

Fourth: Gerald apologizes to Shadow for contacting the Black Comet. Which would imply that that is the real transgression being addressed.

Furthermore, Gerald reveals that he created the Eclipse Cannon in order to use the power Black Doom seeks against him.

Eggman exclaims, "That's it! It's brilliant!"

His faith in his grandfather's brilliance seems to be renewed by this one line.

In addition to being a genuinely clever scheme on its own merits, Gerald's admission to what the Cannon was originally created for answers Eggman's unanswered questions in SA2 about the professor's intentions in creating a weapon able to destroy a planet.

Gerald's credibility is restored.

Which brings us to:

---

Five: Eggman's lines during the Devil Doom boss fight imply that he is reassuring himself that Shadow is the product of Gerald's work, thus preserving Gerald's credibility as a scientist and as a Proper Robotnik(tm).

The underlying question at the heart of the conflict is: who gave Shadow life? The hands that sculpted his mind and soul, or the one that granted him flesh? Who deserves the prestige of being considered the creator of the ultimate life form?

Both Gerald and Black Doom lay claim to Shadow, albeit in vastly different ways.

Gerald calls Shadow his "son," implying fatherhood and the nurturing, caring, and affection it represents.

To Gerald, Shadow was not just a cluster of flesh gestating in a test tube, something engineered to achieve a result, but a fully autonomous being in whom he places respect and trust.

Furthermore, a lyric from Chosen One suggests Shadow reciprocated the Professor's love:

You made me, and I loved you But I can't change the things that I've done

Black Doom, on the other hand, views Shadow as nothing more than something to be controlled. A pawn at best. An investment that needs to begin repaying its debts in order to justify its continued existence:

It is worth noting that despite being paralyzed by his Black Arms blood, it is Shadow's will - the act of choice, the marker of a truly sentient and autonomous soul - that overcomes the effects of Black Doom's mind control.

Knowing the full context that Gerald granted Shadow a soul in Battle makes Shadow's resistance a powerful moment indeed, for it not only builds upon lore established in previous games, but represents Shadow breaking the cycle of control.

In so doing, ShTH reinforces its theme of Shadow's agency, showing us just how far he's come. He is not just a weapon to be used and discarded, nor doomed by the circumstances of his birth to walk the path preordained for him. Shadow alone decides his fate.

Black Doom may have offered the raw genetic material, but Gerald breathed life into the entity and gave it a soul. Of the two feats, the latter is more amazing. That's why Devil Doom claims Gerald's accomplishment as his own:

And why Eggman claims Shadow truly is the ultimate life form his grandfather created:

Eggman is reassuring himself that Shadow really is the ultimate life form built by his grandfather's hands, and not just some abomination Gerald cooked up in a lab with the devil acting as sous chef.

For Eggman, it's not a question of whether Gerald was a good guy. It's a question of Robotnik(tm) pride.

As his contemplation of Gerald's motives in SA2 proves, Eggman has trouble grappling with the idea that his grandfather was only human, subject to the same faults and limitations as ordinary people. It doesn't gel with the idea that Granddad was the greatest scientific mind of his time. What do you mean he failed at his magnum opus?

This is why I think "For Black Doom?" hints at what the shock is really about for Eggman. The idea that Shadow may not be the product of his idol's hands alone disturbs him. He rejects the idea that Gerald would agree to work with Black Doom, much less sell out to create Shadow, calling it "insane."

And indeed, the fact that Gerald acknowledged his mistake and created a contingency gave Eggman relief, for he no longer seemed to question Gerald after that. It confirmed the most important thing he needed to know: that perhaps The Master Plan(tm) doesn't fall so very far from the genius tree after all.

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for achieving my dreams?

I (adult M) don't know what i did wrong. I really don't. But my friends keep being mad at me because of a few tiny mistakes. You see I had these two best friends (same age as me, M and F, I'll refer to them as C and M) who I've known for many years. C and i were also writing partners for many years. We wrote some pretty famous musicals actually but I'm not going to name them because I don't wish to reveal my identity. The problem is while we both dreamed about being successful, I actually did everything in my power to achieve that. I mean I'm all for holding to ideals to a certain extent but come on you have to make some compromises here and there! It's not fair of him to be mad at me over these things! I did cheat on my wife with the star of our show, sure, I admit that was a bit of a mistep but it also has nothing to do with this. Otherwise my only "crime" is trying to make us successful. In turn C said all these horrible things about me on a talk show about how much of a sellout I am and it could've seriously hurt my image! I felt so betrayed. He tried to apologize but I haven't talked to him since.

As for M she stayed my friend for a few years after that incident but recently at a party I held to celebrate my latest movie's success she had some kind of freakout and insulted both me and my guests and then just stormed out.

And my wife who was the lead actress in my breakthrough success (and who i cheated on my first wife with) got all angry with me at the same party too because she didn't get the role she originally played in the stage production! How is it my fault that she simply aged out of it?

Even my own son didn't invite me to his graduation (that might be related to the cheating thing)

Why does everyone hate me? Where did I go wrong? AITA?

[teamxdark]

29. Duel

"Good morning sunshine," Rouge sing-songed, shuffling a deck of cards as Shadow stepped into frame.

"What nonsense do you have for me this time?" Shadow asked unenthusiastically.

"Right to the point, glad to see it. Well! Have you heard of the gaming phenomenon known as Fuzzy Puppies?"

Shadow didn't make any kind of reaction, clearly hoping to blow through this whole ordeal before it became his whole day. Rouge decided to take it in stride.

"Eventually the manufacturer realized that a) producing and collecting figurines costs more than most people are willing to spend for a strategy game, and b) cards are cheaper to make and buy, easier to collect, and ultimately more profitable as a whole. Thus… drum roll please?"

Shadow maintained his silence as Omega rolled an oil drum across the grotto in the background of the shot.

"...Good enough. Ta-daaaaa!" She shoved the cards into Shadow's face, filling his vision with brightly-colored designs and text far too small to read comfortably. "Dueling Dogs! Registered spin-off card game of Fuzzy Puppies. Now with additional accessories, terrains, and commands!"

Shadow pushed the cards away from his face. "How much did they pay you to say that?"

"Shadow, please. I may have my price, but I'm no sellout. So, when are you going to play with me?"

"Never. Your asinine games are of no interest to me… plus the artstyle is trash."

"YOU ARE TRASH!" Omega retaliated from the top of his oil drum tower, which was still under construction.

"And a chicken," Rouge dismissed, waving the cards in front of his face as a taunt.

"Oh no you don't," Shadow growled, swatting her hand away. "I'm not going to be fooled that easy."

Not again, his mind supplied unhelpfully, recalling all the times Rouge and Omega and Eggman had roped him into something stupid and unworthy of his time, just by implying that he was unwilling to take the challenge. He was the Ultimate Lifeform! This challenge and all those others were beneath him! He would not be swayed--

"Win a game against me and I won't bother you for a whole two weeks."

Shadow's interest flared in spite of himself. "I don't think that's possible for you," he sneered, trying his best to save face. "And why should I trust your word?"

Rouge's wings flapped in what might have been genuine offense. "When have I ever steered you wrong?"

Shadow glared at her.

"...Rhetorical question. The real question is… is it still worth it to try?"

"I don't know how to play," Shadow pointed out, crossing his arms.

"You're a smart guy, you can figure it out," Rouge wheedled.

"THE WINNER WILL ALSO GET THE PRIVILEGE OF SITTING AT THE BASE OF MY TOWER," Omega added, sweetening the deal by gesturing to his oil drum tower that by all means should not have fit in the grotto.

"Pretty good deal, huh Shaddy?"

"Call me that again and I'm shaving your head."

"First of all, rude! Second of all…"

She slammed a unopened deck of cards in front of him with a grin.

"These are for you~ Make your own doggy army, but remember that you can't win with dogs alone! It's the accessories, terrains and--"

"You say this like I've never played a card game before," scoffed Shadow, who had never played a card game before.

"Well okay then." Rouge grinned at him, dragging a play mat out of nowhere and setting it in between them both on the flat-ish rock that served as their table. "Let's duel!"

As Shadow looked from the designated play spots on the mat to the cards still wrapped in a layer of protective plastic, he steeled his resolve to win this game as quickly as possible.

After all, that oil drum tower looked dope.

[female-malice]

fagdaze/183491787511/

Wow I didn't know it had been going on for this long...good source of receipts of trans 'activism'...

Yeah. The violent "punch your local terf" thing has been around for about a decade. I don't know what exactly started it.

But my guess is that the Ronda Rousey/Fallon Fox beef was a catalyst.

Ronda was a big deal in the early 2010s. She was one of the first female UFC stars to break into mainstream pop culture. Then, in 2013, Dana White found some psychopath, turned him into Fallon Fox, and used him for manufactured UFC drama. Ronda naturally refused to fight Mr. Fox. After that, Ronda became the foremost TERF in everyone's mind. In the mid 2010s, when TRAs would explain to people what a TERF is, they'd use Ronda as the example. I know this because that's how they explained it to me back in the day.

Anyway, this was an influential event for the TRA movement. It planted a seed in the activism hivemind.

And the other factor is the other famous early 2010s TIM, Tom Gabel. Before 2012, TIMs were just stealth homosexual transexuals and suburban straight male AGP fetishists. And there was no solidarity or connection between those two groups. But then one of those suburban straight male AGP fetishists happened to be Tom Gabel. He had gone from crust punk hero to sellout supreme. He had lost all his punk cred in exchange for a white picket fence. But he found his financial success and suburban married fatherhood life boring. So becoming Laura and making transgender music was really his only option at that point. Suddenly, straight crossdressers weren't just creepy suburban men. They were punks, too.

A lot of young college students wanted to Support Trans Women so they started listening to Against Me. And basically overnight, everyone traded in their NorthFace jackets for punk denim and ACAB patches.

So Tom Gabel came out as trans in 2012. Fallon Fox came out in 2013. Tom's first trans album came out in 2014. Ronda said she'll never fight Fallon Fox in 2014. And by 2015, college kids had patches on their denim jackets that said "punch a TERF." In 2016, boxer/physicist/"TERF" Magdalen Berns started making youtube videos. And that really cemented the "punch a TERF" energy.

And that's where the modern TRA movement got its flavor from.