#I mean bullying affectionately. y’all weren’t mean about it.

[toxicrevolver]

Okay. Episode 14. The finale. I’m not ready. Commentary and spoilers under the cut. You should know the drill by now.

- THANK GOD WE DIDN’T GET AN INCEST PLOT LINE.

- Gun (Vegas’s dad) Fuck you. Please die already. I never liked you.

- Vegas. You confuse me. Who’s side are you on??

- okay typical mafia shoot out. Check. Typical mafia family betrayal. Check.

- “but I’m on your side” CUTE BUT NOW IS NOT THE TIME.

- KINN. NOWS NOT THE TIME TO BE THINKIN ABOUT DICK

- Kinn and Porsche against an entire hoard of bad guys. Hot.

- ARM AND TANKHUN FOR THE WIN. THE BRAINCELL IS BRAINCELLING.

- is Arm/Tankhun a ship? Bcs I’m kinda shipping it. NOT THE POINT

- Porchay. Baby. Why did you put your headphones against your head while there’s hair dye in your hair? Those some damn good headphones tho if he ain’t hearin shit.

- Kim single handedly taking out the entire group. Hot.

- Vegas deserved to get decked in the face. (I still love him now tho)

- why did I find the Vegas/Pete moment cute DON’T ANSWER THAT

- WHAT

- there are so many thoughts running rampant in my head about what just went down.

- the whole Porsche’s mom being alive thing. Idk how I feel about that. Slightly confused on the plot of that currently. And who actually killed Porsche’s dad.

- Gun’s dead. Good.

- Pete resigning and going after Vegas. Cute.

- That was a super sweet and tender Vegas/Pete moment and now I have feelings. BAD FEELINGS TAKE THEM BACK. I’M SAD.

- where are the Vegas/Pete pet play fics. I know they have to exist. Hand them over. DON’T ANSWER THAT. YOU DIDN’T READ THAT.

- VEGAS NO. WHERE ARE THE FIX IT FICS. I’M SERIOUS. I AM LIVID. FUCK THAT BODY GUARD IN PARTICULAR I’M GLAD YOU’RE DEAD. I ALMOST THREW MY PHONE. I QUIT. I AM AGGRESSIVELY THROWING TABLES IN MY MIND. YEET.

- okay. Porsche as head of the minor family. Makes sense. Again. Typical Mafia bullshittery.

- JUST TIME SKIP THEN. FINE.

- I love the Mafia husbands. The way that scene was done was cool. Especially the cut from Porsche originally walking into that hall compared to now.

- THE RINGS THING WAS CUTE.

- Tay that’s an ugly fuckin shirt. Clown core.

- PORCHAY 😭😭😭😭😭

- KIM. YOU CAN HAVE YOUR KNEE CAPS BACK BUT ONLY IF YOU FUCKIN GET ON THEM AND BEG PORCHAY FOR FORGIVENESS.

- domestic mafia husbands again. Yes. Living for this.

- the fact Kinn made the drink using a jigger is funny to me bcs Porsche can probably free pour

- VEGAS IS ALIVE 🎉🎉🎉🎉 MY BOY. I’M SO HAPPY

- I love how this whole lovey dovey thing is taking place on the boat Porsche threw himself overboard of in the beginning. Full circle.

- are the beta fish a symbol and I’m just stupid. Bcs we saw them before in a tank with a divider and now they’re back in separate bowls (we’re not discussing animal husbandry. I know it’s bad. It’s a tv show.)

- okay. Still undecided on the whole Porsche’s mom being alive thing. Like what was the purpose. It was a sweet ending tho.

- to the after credits

- I’M BACK IN MY VEGAS/PETE FEELS 😭😭

- Macau joking around immediately. Typical younger sibling behavior. Love that bcs normal for once.

- WHERE IS MY VEGAS/PETE SPIN OFF. HAND IT OVER.

OVERALL REVIEW AND EXTRA COMMENTS

- 100000/10 🔥🔥🔥 I loved the show. Yes it was kinda stereotypical in the Mafia bits but those were few and far between honestly. The plot was still kinda original and it was gay so it gets bonus points just for that.

- I would actually watch this again. Which is a huge compliment from me bcs there’s only maybe 4 shows I’ll watch more than once.

- WHERE IS MY VEGAS/PETE SPIN OFF???

- WHERE IS MY KIM/PORCHAY SPIN OFF???? I NEED TO KNOW IF MY SON GETS A HAPPY ENDING.

- also. Like what is Kim up to?? Obviously we see Porchay living in the major family house with Kinn/Porsche. And Kim is back at his apartment. But other than groveling for forgiveness from Porchay, what’s he doing?? And why was he curious about Porsche’s background in the first place?? Kim could have stayed uninvolved and left Porchay out of this and the plot could have still worked in my opinion.

- I NEED A TAY/TIME EITHER SPIN OFF OR BACK STORY SHORT. SOMETHING.

- I NEED AN EPISODE ABOUT TANKHUN GETTING KIDNAPPED AS A KID. THAT WAS GLOSSED OVER AND ONLY MENTIONED TO EXPLAIN HIM BEING INSANE.

- IS THERE GONNA BE ANOTHER SEASON BCS I AM IMPATIENT.

- I walked into this show just expecting mafia bullshittery and gay bullshittery. I got both. But I also just fell in love with a whole genre of show (this was the first BL I have ever watched). I don’t watch tv shows or even movies often bcs I have a hard time getting invested in new characters and actually focusing on the plot of a show/movie. But the show was long enough to keep me interested and still short enough I didn’t get bored. The episodes being roughly an hour is nice bcs I actually get plot in the episode (to me a typical 20 minute tv show just isn’t enough time to develop a good plot line). I’ve got a ton of BL dramas on my watch list and the length of the series/episode are all pretty similar (if I remember correctly) and the consistency is nice.

- Also. Gained several new ships and I unlocked the shows fanfic genre. A win for me.

- Also also. I know Kinn/Porsche is obviously the main ship of the show but I have a soft spot for Vegas/Pete and I didn’t expect that. I also never expected to like either character but here we are 🤷 Pete is still Pete but bcs my boy Vegas likes him I like him well enough.

Kinnporsche review thread part 2

Episode 5 down.

- Big. Stop getting hurt. Please. I am begging you.

Episode 6 complete

- I HATE ALL OF YALL AGAIN. I AM DISTRAUGHT.

- What started as domestic boyfriends camping in the woods ended in mafia bullshittery. I should have expected this. Fuck happy endings I guess.

[tlcwrites]

Two Hearts Make a Whole

Prompt: “Kiss me again, like you mean it.” Photo prompt below.

Summary: NYC Pride is for celebration, and occasionally, long-overdue revelations.

Word Count: 2,001

Tags/Content warnings: Marvel. Stucky. If you have a problem with it, there's the door. SFW. Slight TFATWS spoilers so read at your own risk. Platonic Reader. Two idiots in love. Technically canon-divergent because I'm still in my everyone-is-alive-and-in-this-timeline happy place that I will never ever leave fuck you very much Russo brothers but not AU. Found family. All the feels. Complete and total LGBTQ+ support. Lots of bad language words because #me. Un-beta'd.

Author’s Note: Okay so yes this is technically 4 weeks late for @autumnleaves1991-blog's Writer Wednesday weekly challenge. BUT, it was incredibly important to me to finish this one before Pride month is over. Made it by the skin of my teeth.

Happy Pride, y’all. If you’re out, you’re amazing. If you’re closeted, you’re amazing. However you identify is valid and important. Trans folx are LGBTQ+. Bisexuals are LGBTQ+. Ace folx are LGBTQ+. Anyone who identifies or thinks they may be as queer is LGBTQ+. All are welcome in the family. You have the right to choose your pronouns and we have the responsibility to use them. Live whatever your truth looks like to you and love each other. Love is love is love is love. If your family doesn’t accept you for you, I’m your mom now and I’ve got mom hugs available on demand. Homophobes and TERFS can fuck off and roll in poison ivy. Always punch Nazis. Pride shouldn't be limited to the month of June. And don’t you dare forget that Black and Brown trans women were the ones who rioted at Stonewall, and we owe everything to their bravery. Don’t forget that much of popular ‘gay’ culture was appropriated from Black women. And for more facts about Pride that you should absolutely know, Rawiyah Tariq (@ mammyisdead on Instagram) has a phenomenally good overview.

“Oh my god.” You gasp loudly. "Oh my GOD. Is that-"

“What?!” Instantly in First Avenger Protective Mode™️, Steve surveys the crowd, wishing he had an actual shield instead of the screen printed one on his shirt. “What is it?”

You gasp again, smacking Sam’s arm repeatedly. “OHMYGOD IT IS HOLY FUCK.”

“First; ow.” Now-Cap rubs his bicep. “Second; clue in the class before Steve has an aneurysm, please.”

Vibrating with excitement doesn’t begin to describe your current state. “HER ROYAL HIGHNESS MISS LEMON MERINGUE IS STANDING RIGHT FUCKING THERE.”

With the finesse of a shampoo commercial, Bucky's dark locks fly as he whips around. “What?!”

“RIGHT THERE RIGHT THERE RIGHT THERE.” You abandon a relieved Sam and latch on to Bucky’s vibranium arm. “Oh my GOD I love her so fucking much.”

“She was robbed, absolutely fucking robbed,” he agrees, craning his neck to get a better view. “Divine Tension’s lip sync was shameful.”

Sam glances at Steve, who is slowly coming out of protector mode. “What the ever-loving hell are they talking about?”

“RuPaul’s Drag Race.” Nat flicks more confetti at both Cap-the-former and Cap-the-current. “They watch it every week.”

“Really, Steven, for a guy with enhanced super senses, you miss a lot.” Tony hefts a bedazzled Morgan higher on his back. The toddler, accompanied by Scott playing air-piano on the ground, sings along with the ABBA song being blasted at full volume through the street. Tony continues as if this is an everyday occurrence. “Why do you think both of your People disappear every Friday evening?”

Ears pink, Steve mumbles something.

“What?!” The only other one with hearing enhanced enough to hear a murmur over the cacophony of several thousand people belting out the chorus of ‘Dancing Queen’ at the top of their lungs, Bucky turns to stare at his friend. “You thought we were datin’?”

Steve’s blush extends down his neck.

You and Bucky stare at each other for a moment before you both collapse on each other, exploding into stomach clenching, thigh slapping laughter.

“I’m gonna guess that’s a ‘no’?” Clint confirms with Nat.

“Oh, a big ‘no’.” She watches affectionately as you and Bucky calm down enough to look at each other, breathe for a second, and both promptly dissolve into hysterics once more. “Like, the biggest ‘no’.”

Sam crossed his arms across his chest, his stoic stance so reminiscent of Steve it’s amusing (as well as a beautiful disparity to the sequined crop top he’s sporting. Oof, those abs.). “How do I not know about this?”

“Because you’re not a former super spy?” The usually-Black-but-today-Rainbow Widow tosses the last of her confetti at Tony, who spins a jubilant Morgan into it. “Or because you and that leggy barista from the lobby coffee shop are too busy playing hide-the-“

“-Baby Shark!” Morgan suddenly shrieks, flailing towards a guy on roller blades wearing a fin and tail (and not much else).

“Yeah,” Nat finishes with a smirk, “Hide-the-Baby Shark.”

Sam flips her a gesture that makes Clint laugh and Bruce sigh.

You and Bucky have finally managed to pull yourselves together. “Oh my god, Steven Grant,” you gasp, wiping tears from your eyes. “That’s the funniest fucking shit I’ve ever fucking heard.”

“Language!”

Steve glares at Tony. “One. Time. It was one. Time.”

Bucky slings his flesh arm around Steve’s shoulders. “Oh, punk. You may have perfect vision now, but sometimes you’re still as blind as you were before.”

Visiortn himself nods sagely. “Humans can be quite unperceptive when it comes to matters of the heart.” Vision casts a fond smile at Wanda, who is using her powers to make Pietro’s tinsel wig fly on and off. “Sometimes you have to look harder to see what’s right in front of your nose.”

A confused frown on that handsome face, Captain Clueless looks at Bucky. “Why do I feel like everyone else knows something that I don’t?”

His bestie sighs deeply. “Because, Stevie, almost everyone else on this planet knows that my tastes tend towards tall, blonde, blue-eyed knuckleheads who have zero sense of self-preservation.”

“And an ass you could bounce a quarter off of,” Scott helpfully supplies.

“And that,” Bucky agrees.

Steve frowns.

You press your palms to your eyes in vexation. “You, Steve. He’s talking about you.” (Seriously, how has this idiot survived for over a century while being so dumb?)

Whatever he was expecting, it was certainly not that. “He-“ The Man With A Plan gapes as he turns to his oldest friend. “You-“

“Me,” Bucky says gently.

Even though you’re slightly surprised that Bucky is going to do this in such a public forum, you can’t help but be so proud of your friend. It has taken a long time for Bucky to believe he deserves to be happy. There are days he still sinks into that dark place, where his inner demons whisper that he should have fought harder against his Hydra captors, and that his past actions were still somehow his fault. Those are the days no amount of baking or Modern Marvels will bring him out of his funk. You, Steve, Sam, and Nat have all held those strong shoulders as they shook with sobs, overwhelmed by the shame and horror at what his hands had done without his consent.

But he’s here. He’s free. And he’s smiling nervously at his best friend.

“I-” Steve is short-circuiting. “Me?!”

“Stevie.” With the kind of tender patience that can only be born of a lifetime of keeping (or attempting to keep) an idiot such as one Steven Grant Rogers from flinging himself headlong into every fight he comes across, Bucky moves his flesh hand to the back of Steve’s neck. His face is full of such soft affection that you almost want to look away for fear of intruding on this suddenly intimate moment. “What do you think ‘til the end of the line’ means, you idiot? You’ve been it for me since I was thirteen-years-old.”

Blue eyes are locked with blue eyes as Steve processes this revelation. “I-” He shakes his head as if to declutter his thoughts. “This whole time?”

“Since the first time I saw that asshole knock you down, and your scrawny ass climbed right back up.” A wry chuckle escapes as Bucky reminices. “You were ninety pounds soaking wet, and you stood there, against a guy who was three times your size, and never waivered for a second. It was magnificent.”

“I don’t like bullies,” is Steve’s quiet response.

Bucky’s grin is adoring. “I know, sweetheart.” He gently strokes the back of Steve’s neck with his thumb. “You’ve always had a heart way bigger than your brain.”

Steve is still back on the first part of Bucky’s admission. “If you’ve felt- if you-” He’s practically pleading. “Why didn’t you say anything then?”

Bucky shrugs, attempting and failing nonchalance. “It was a different time, you know?” He’s uncharacteristically unsure of himself, the subtle waiver in his voice revealing the anxiety born of a lifetime of being forced to hide his truth. “I mean, you remember how it was; you didn’t talk about, no one talked about- about being- about people like...” He swallows thickly.  “And I was so scared you didn’t, that you weren’t-” His voice breaks.

Even though you’ve all been emotionally invested in this love story for years, the entire team respectfully pretends not to listen as the former Winter Soldier quietly admits his deepest secret to his closest friend. It’s enraging as Bucky confesses yet another way he's been a victim of his circumstances, and denied his right to live freely without derision. Once more, you’re awed by his resilience.

“-it was a risk I couldn’t take,” Bucky finally gets out, that stubborn fire back in his eyes. “I couldn’t lose you, Steve. I couldn’t chance it. I could live with just being your friend and only your friend so long it meant you were in my life.”

Stunned silence meets the end of his confession. Steve’s face is impassive, those cerulean eyes uncharacteristically inscrutable.

You can all tell Bucky is heading steadily towards dread and heartbreak the longer Steve takes to respond. You and Sam exchange a look, both ready to intervene if Steve demonstrates any of the abhorrent attitudes that were so prevalent in the society of his youth. It would be completely out of character for him, but...

Finally, Steve speaks. “You’re telling me,” he says, his words slow and deliberate, “that you made me wait ninety-three years to tell me you’ve felt the same way about me as I have about you since the day you picked me up out of that alley?!”

The whole found family breaths a collective sigh of relief as Steve pulls Bucky even closer, broad chest to broad chest.

“Okay, to be fair, you were an ice cube for most of that time and I wasn’t exactly available for a relationship.” Bucky’s grin stands in contradiction to his mullish defense. “But yeah, that’s the gist of it.” There’s the Bucky you all know and love, biting his lip with those perfect white teeth. “Now, punk, I’d really like to kiss you now, but first I need you to say you want me to.”

“You-” Steve’s throat works as he attempts- and fails- to rein in his emotions. “You jerk.”

And then the Star Spangled Man seizes the president of the Sometimes-Former-Assassins Club by his ridiculously perfect face and crashes their mouths together.

At any Pride event, seeing two men kissing is, obviously, to be expected. But seeing The First Avenger and The White Wolf attempting to swallow each other’s tongues is not at all routine. As people realize what is happening, the crowd is whipped into a frenzy the likes of which is usually reserved for the aftermath of sporting events and elections that defeat fascists.

Watching the two men embrace, Scott sniffles loudly. “I’m gonna cry, I’m so happy.”

He’s certainly not the only one. Wanda has a watery smile as she wraps her arms around Vision and Pietro; Pepper, Tony, and Bruce are watching with fond parental energy; you and Sam sandwich Peter between the two of you, grins practically splitting your faces. Even Nat’s eyes look suspiciously shiny and she and Clint sling their arms around each other with platonic affection. And that’s not counting the several thousand people who are cheering for love being love being love being love.

When they finally break their embrace, the Centennial twins are startled to see they’ve collected quite an audience.

“Uh, so…” Suddenly bashful, Steve glances back to his- partner? Boyfriend? Soulmate? Is there a word that can accurately describe two people who have found each other time and again in a world that seems hell-bent on keeping them apart?- his ears practically maroon with embarrassment. For a guy with one of the most-recognized faces in the world, Steve is still incredibly and endearingly uncomfortable with attention. “Buck?”

Bucky seems just as stunned as Steve.

Thankfully, the masses demonstrate the usual support that’s the hallmark of Pride. “LOVE IS LOVE!” someone screams in the crowd. It’s quickly echoed, and chants fill the park.

The attention momentarily off them, the former Winter Soldier and his giant himbo of a soulmate look back at each other. You pretend not to watch through the happiest tears as they embrace again, bringing their foreheads together. The relief they share is palpable, as they’re finally able to show the world- and each other- the love they’ve each hidden for so long.

Bucky’s voice is so soft you have to strain to hear it. “You have no idea how much m’in love with you, Stevie.”

“Pretty sure I do,” Steve answers, bringing a hand up to carefully wipe the tears from Bucky’s face. “‘cause it’s as much as I love you, Buck.”

Bucky's answering grin can only be described as saucy. “Then kiss me again, like you mean it.”

And Steve, for once in his long life, does exactly as ordered.

---

A/N: “The Sometimes-Former-Assassins Club” is from Starry_Emerald173’s BRILLIANT The Avengers Wrangler over on AO3. If you haven’t read it yet, drop what you’re doing and do so immediately. Make sure you're not drinking any liquids, or your keyboard/phone may be in peril.

[blissfulparker]

Not like us→fratboy!tom pt.1

Parings: fratboy!tom x reader

Warnings: pure angst

Summary: you over hear some things tom said to Harrison and it turns out your relationship has been something tom doesn’t want the rest of the world to see.

A/n: there will only be two parts to this but this was from a blurb requested by an anon and I got multiple requests to do a second part or make it into a fic so this is the extended version and also the first part! I have another frat boy tom fic this week along with ‘black beauty’ hope y’all enjoy!!

“I don’t wanna be rude or anything it’s just that...it’s just that people aren’t use to that type of stuff.”

It was Friday afternoon. After your last class of the week you found yourself curled up in Toms plaid comforter bed trying to cool off after a long stressful week. You were no stranger to his bed, or his room. You spent endless nights here studying, sleeping, cuddling, watching movies, the left side was your side and the right was Toms. Tom joked he slept closer to the door to protect you if anyone came in.

“I mean, yeah...you’ve been dating for about What? 5 months? If you wanna break up with her just do it now, it’s just gonna suck if you wait longer.” Harrison, Toms best mate since primary school, spoke loudly.

The kitchen, the boys were talking about you in the kitchen. You were awake now, trying to fix the mess on your head and wiping off mascara that moved in your sleep. You clung onto Toms university hoodie that smelt just like him and always made your stress go away.

“I love her though, I do. I just don’t want her to get hurt you know? Guys like me aren’t supposed to date girls like her.” Toms voice broke at the beginning but stayed strong at the end.

You, they were talking about you. You who’ve been dating the infamous campus fratboy Tom holland for about five months and it started over a broken down car, Taco Bell, and mental breakdowns. It was the stupid start to a loving relationship but you and tom were almost made for each other in the strangest way. You two were polar opposites that became one when the two of you were with each other.

“I get it, she’s kinda a dork...no offense.” Harrison spoke and you now cracked the door open to hear the conversation a little bit clearer. You didn’t know if any of the other boys were downstairs and you really didn’t want to find out.

“No I understand, she is. And like that’s the thing, she’s dorky and cute and all nerdy and I’m this fratboy who can chug a whole bottle of vodka in an hour if he tried. What does that say about us? More me specifically.” You look down at the jaw strings of the hoodie and mess with them. Was it safe for you to keep listening? No. Were you going to anyways? Yes.

“I’ve got a reputation to keep up, so does she. Remember Megan? Megan is the type of girl people want to see me with. Not (y/n), but I love (y/n). That’s the thing, I love her and people are going to hate us for that.” His voice was broken but it was almost like he’s been needing to rant for awhile now. You couldn’t go out there, what would you even say?

“Have you fucked?” Harrison’s bold statement made you step back. Tom was your first, it was two months in and you were 100% ready. Tom has had sex Dozens of Times But you, you were different because this time it was for love, not for fun.

“Of course, but it’s best if no one knows. Keeps her safe. Keeps our reputations high.” The sound of a beer bottle hitting the recycling bin made you crawl back into bed. Pretend you’re asleep and act like you’ve never heard a thing.

Everything made sense though why he never wanted to post pictures on Instagram, no snapchats, you never went to the parties—not that you wanted to anyways—never got super affectionate around his friends. Why Harrison was the only one to know about the relationship.

He was ashamed of you. He was embarrassed to be in love with you.

No, you weren’t like the other girls he’s been with. Not a party animal nor a outgoing person. You were simple, nerdy, studied hard, loved to stay in, hopeless romantic. You were a girl tom always dreamed about but never thought was real, and you were perfect but he knew other people didn’t think that.

“Baby?” Tom whispered and you sat up rubbing your eyes and pretending like you just woke up. “What’s wrong?” He noticed the tears and the red eyes and flushed look in your face.

“I—it’s—my allergies, they’ve been acting up. Seasons changing are the worse.” You lied and tom wrapped his arm around your waist. How could he act like this, a loving and adoring boyfriend, when he just claimed he was ashamed of you.

“Oh, I have some medicine if you want—“ he starts and you shake your head.

“It’s best if I go back to my dorm. Alone. I think I need a full nights rest.” You sniffle as you stand up and look over to his mirror and fix yourself up.

“Oh okay, text me when you get there please.” He hands you your backpack and kisses your forehead. The kiss felt sour against your skin, his lips no longer felt soft and plump but bitter and hard.

“I will.” You give a soft, fake smile before walking out. You pass Harrison who gives you a sweet smile before you exit the door.

He was ashamed, he was ashamed, he was ashamed. That’s all that ran though your head. You weren’t like Megan, his ex who was drop dead gorgeous—she cheated on him with two different guys so you have that huge advantage of not being an asshole—but she was still what he wanted. They were perfect, the light of every party.

People like you weren’t supposed to be with people like him. Study hard, nerdy, good grades, good girls, weren’t supposed to end up with frat boys like Tom Holland. Boys like him were supposed to be with party animals and adventurous people. Not you.

Boys like him are never supposed to be with girls like you.

-

Saturday evening, the next day.

Books scattered across your bed as you shoved information into your brain about chemistry. Your glasses have a glare and your roommate was out for the night. Normally you’d spend your Saturdays with tom but currently you didn’t know where he was and didn’t bother to see him. You didn’t respond all day and you made sure to let him know you wanted to be alone.

Two knocks. Two knocks on your front door is what made you jump and take out your headphones.

“I’m coming!” You shouted as you hopped off the bed and jogged over to the door.

There stood tom, two bags of Chinese food and a bag from wallgreens. He wore a skin tight green Ralph Lauren polo shirt and some joggers.

“You never told me if you made it home safe.” He pouted as he walked past you.

You forgot that your Saturday nights were perfect, cuddled up in bed, eating Chinese food and having messy makeout sessions.

“Sorry, my phone was off and I fell asleep.” You lied. He set the stuff down before opening the wallgreens bag.

“I got you some more medicine, and this green smoothie thingy? I dunno, the lady said it helps clear your sinuses. I kinda looks gross I wouldn’t drink it either.” He sets it down and you watch him with folded arms.

“Don’t you have a party to attended tonight?” Your voice bitter as you talk about the frat.

“It’s overrated. Saturday’s are meant for us and I like them this way.” He sets kicks off his shoes. You were mad and you didn’t know how to handle it, so you did it in the most petty way possible.

“No, lets go to the party, what’s the theme I bet I can find something.” You walk over to your closet. Tom follows you to stop you.

“Why would we do that? You hate parties remember? Too many people. We always stay in.” He grabs your hand and you can’t help but to feel your eyes water. He was an idiot, an actual idiot that you wish wasn’t so pretty.

“Why don’t you want me at your parties?” You step back and he furrows his brows.

“Peach, What are you talking—“ He starts and you shake your head.

“You can at least invite me! An offer would be nice! But you never did, because I’m too dorky and nerdy to be around you. Or maybe it’s because I’m not like your other Ex girlfriends in the past.” You sniffle and he steps closer.

“Are you on your period? What’s happening? Who’s telling you all this?” He stands there clueless and you wipe your nose.

“You! Yesterday I woke up from my nap and I heard you and Harrison talking. ‘People Like me shouldn’t be with girls like her’ and ‘I’ve got a reputation to keep up’? What the fuck tom!” You shout at him and he steps back.

You heard all of it and it was hitting tom. He never meant any of it, not in the way you took it. He just didn’t want people teasing you, making fun of you, bullying you, he wanted to keep you safe. He was also selfish, he knew that if he took you to one of his parties you’d get taken advantage of. He would leave you for one second and you’d be gone, he can’t even think of the worse case scenario or else it would hurt him.

“You know, I know I’m not super popular nor am I this victoria secret model but I’m not embarrassed to be around you nor am I ashamed which I probably should be because smart girls can’t be with guys like you!” You say out of anger and now tom gives a look.

“Are you calling me dumb?” He asks and you walk over to your bed.

“You didn’t listen to me at all! You are the one who said all these things and that was only the stuff I heard! What else did you say, Huh? I want to know.” You wipe your eyes and he shakes his head.

“Nothing! I said nothing else! Harrison just asked me why I never post with you or why the other boys don’t know about you it’s to keep you safe! It’s only to keep you safe! The people I hang out with are not good people and I just don’t want anything bad happening to you!” His face was red and you wanted nothing more than to run out and never speak to him again.

“I’m a fucking adult I can take care of myself! You’re the one who said that people will care if they know about us. I don’t care about my reputation, Holland! I have absolutely nothing to lose, it’s you who are selfish and it’s you who still wants to be the golden boy of the circle. The one thing that I have that all those other girls don’t is fucking loyalty, and trust, and I give a shit about you! They don’t! Megan cheated on you and I would never even think of that! Sydney only used You for sex and popularity and guess what tom? I’m not doing that because I actually love you but it’s very obvious that you only care about yourself.” You grab your keys and purse which causes tom to freak out even more.

“What are you doing?” He stops you but you yank away and keep going.

“I need time to cool down, im going for a drive. When you decide what you want to do with us, come find me.” You storm off leaving tom in your dorm.

Tom fucked up. He did that a lot but most of the time he could find a simple way out of fucking up. This time he couldn’t, He was about to loose the most valuable thing in his life.

The most logical thing for him to do was not chase after you. You didn’t want him to chase after you anyways, you wanted him to figure out what he wanted not for him to beg on his knees for your love. He stormed out of your dorm as well, leaving everything he’d brought and went back to his frat house.

He couldn’t forget though that there’d be a party in about two hours, the boys were setting up and tom stormed in and ruined their mood.

“Hey! Look who showed up to help!” Yelled one of the boys, Alex.

“Hey mate, you alright?” Harrison stopped him. Bright red eyes, heavy breathing, tension in his whole body, he was pissed.

“Leave me be.” He mumbled and Harrison stopped him again. The whole frat was looking at him, even the extra friends who came to help out.

“Hey, What happened? Where’d you go?” Haz stops and tom tries to push past him.

“She heard, she fucking heard everything and all the shit—“ tom started and everyone was confused but Haz.

“(Y/n)?” Haz says and immediately everyone goes to shock.

“Woah man, you’re fucking (y/n)? Nice!” One said and Haz gave a look to the boy. The rest were confused with who you even were.

“Let me go, please.” Tom had tears back in his face and Haz let him run up into his room like a child. He didn’t know where you were and didn’t know what he’d say if he called you.

-

You had found yourself at the place where it all started, the place where your car broke down at 12:00am trying to get home from the library and tom just happened to be driving around that night.

“Hey, are you okay?” A thick voice pulled you out of your crying and knocked on your window. You had your hazard lights on and pulled to the side.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s just my car broke down.” You sniffle and he helped you out of the car and popped the hood.

“Can you call someone to tow it? I don’t think I can really help you here.” He asked and you nodded calling your insurance and trying to figure the most out.

“So uhh, you’ve got someone coming?” He asked and you nodded.

“Yeah, yeah, thank you.” You smile at the stranger and he stands there. “You can leave...” you trail off and he shakes his head.

“It’s midnight and it’s a college campus, not so safe to leave a pretty girl alone.” He goes to lean up against his car.

“Thanks.” You wipe your eyes and start to feel yourself cry some more. It was a really long week. Tom jumped up and came over to hold you. Comfort you, make You feel safe.

That was the start of your relationship

He helped you call someone to get it towed and offered to get you some food to help you calm down. The first time you met tom you were crying while eating a burrito from Taco Bell in the back of his car. The fratboy held you in his arms and let you cry all that you felt that day.

Now it was different. It was just you. No tom, no broken car, no Taco Bell, nothing.

Tom holland had broken your heart, how did you not see that coming? Maybe it was because you were blinded by the British charm and the white lopsided smile and floppy curly hair. Maybe if you weren’t as naïveté as other girls then you wouldn’t be stuck in this situation.

If you could go back five months ago and just stay at the library a little longer and have someone else help you, you would’ve. If you could go back and jut say thank you instead of saying yes to his dates, you just might’ve.

The last thing you wanted to feel was tom Holland’s little secret.

Some tags(because my perm tag list is too long): @thollandss @quitetommy @keepmeholland @spiderboytotherescue @delicatepeterparker @candlelightparker @klusterffucked @stormyholland @spiderboytingle

[james-potters-animagus]

all i want

draco malfoy

angst warning

based on the song ‘all i want’ by kodaline. it’s gonna be sad y’all don’t @ me.

all i want is nothing more than to hear you knocking at my door and if i could see your face once more, i’d die a happy man i’m sure

it had been a good four years since the war. it was devastating to say the least. you had been a part of dumbledor’s army and were best friends with harry. you had met when harry had moved to privet drive to live with his aunt and uncle. believe it or not, there was another wizard in that neighborhood. you officially met on the train over, you both recognized each other and sat together, with ronald and hermione.

you and harry had gained a special connection, and began dating in your fourth year. little did you know, a stuck up slytherin would be the cause of that breakup.

you and harry dated up until your sixth year when voldemort’s return was confirmed. of course, that wasn’t the main contender of your breakup, but that seemed to be the easiest thing to pin it on at the time. what had really caused your breakup was a certain platinum blond had gained feelings for you, and wasn’t going to let potter get in the way of his chances with you.

“y/l/n! we need to talk,” draco suddenly yelled, from across the courtyard. you shook your head at the stubborn boy, who wouldn’t even go near the chosen one, or his companions, to talk to you. you sighed, but continued on towards him.

“what is it draco,” you muttered, trying to show him you weren’t pleased with the stunt he had just pulled.

“i like you.” he said, blunt and clear.

“i’m sorry, i don’t return the feelings. i have a boyfriend. your arch enemy to be exact.” you responded, fiddling with your shirt cuffs. draco looked at you like you had threw grown a third head.

“but i thought you did? you always talk to me? when girls talk to me it’s because they’re interested in me. you aren’t interested in me?” draco admitted, his heart dropping a bit.

you could see the pain in his eyes, and suddenly felt bad for the privellaged slytherin. “no! i mean, i’m interested in you, as a, as a person, but not uh, not romantically,” you tried to salvage the little friendship you two shared as draco just looked up at you from his hole he had burned in the ground, waiting for your response.

“oh.” was all he responded as he gave you a small, soft smile and he walked off. you felt terrible. you knew ronald would be high-fiving you right now if he were here, but you couldn’t help but feel sad for the boy.

now, you and harry had broken up, you just didn’t feel romantically inclined to each other anymore. as a sixteen year old who felt she was in love, that didn’t make sense to you at the time, but as you grew up, as you matured, it made much more sense to you. as yours and harry’s relationship crumbled, yours and dracos relationship blossomed. draco hadn’t stopped pining after you, and you finally decided to go on a date with him. and one date turned into two, and then three, and then four, and eventually you began dating. you honestly had the time of your life. and then the second wizarding war hit. draco and his death eater family began sorting out their issues and he decided it would be best to push you away.

of course, you were not going to let this slide. that was until voldemort cursed you. as the cruciatus curse rang out through your body you heard draco scream out. after the pain had stopped and everyone had left he came rushing to you.

when it said your last goodbye, i died a little bit inside

“y/n! y/n? hey, hey, okay, i’m going to get you out of here and you’re going to go as far away from here as you can, alright?” he cooed, picking you up and appartaing you both out of the dementor play ground.

that was years ago now, it was 2002 and you hadn’t spoken to, or seen draco for four years. yet, you remember that day vividly. of course, the nightmares helped you to not forget that, though they weren’t pleasant memories. what you would give to see him again.

i lay in tears in bed all night, alone, without you by my side

you jolted awake, a cold sweat taking over your entire body. you just had one of your routine, vivid nightmares about that horrible day. this time though, it was different. draco hadn’t left you. he stayed with you, the entire time. it was almost worse than the normal ones, waking up, knowing that it didn’t happen. you didn’t even know what happened to draco, or the entire malfoy family for that matter. you occasionally read the daily prophet, or you heard about some things from harry, but that was about it.

you had missed draco terribly. you missed seeing his face, hearing his voice, feeling his touch. you missed everything about him. you looked over to the nightstand and saw the necklace he had given you still there. you didn’t dare move it, afraid to lose it. it was all you had left of your relationship with the boy.

but if you loved me, why’d you leave me? take my body, take my body

all i want is, and all i need is, to find somebody, i’ll find somebody

you pondered why draco hadn’t tried to reach out to you after the war. of course, it could have been things with the death eaters but you remember harry telling you he had killed voldemort. they had won the battle. why hadn’t he tried to talk to you anymore? did he not care for you anymore?

you had tried seeing other people, you met this amazing muggle guy once, he had striking blue eyes and soft brown hair, but you didn’t feel the same spark like you did with harry or draco. since then you hadn’t really tried with dating.

see you brought out the best of me, a part of me i’ve never seen

it seemed when you were with draco you were the best version of yourself. you felt on top of the world when you were with him. there wasn’t anything you couldn’t do.

you took my soul, and wiped it clean, our love was made for movie screens

anyone with eyes could see how well you two worked with each other. the way her eyes lit up when she saw him, the way he stopped making fun of kids as much because he knew it bothered her. the way he stopped bullying muggleborns because her best friend was a muggleborn. they made eachother better.

honestly their relationship seemed perfect. almost too perfect.

but if you loved me, why’d you leave me?

you were sat on your couch in the living room after quite a day teaching at ilvermony. out of no where draco appeared in your fireplace, covered in floo powder. “draco?” you shot up, staring at the boy, well, man now. he was dressed in a black dress shirt with a pair of dark jeans and dress shoes, his grey eyes popping against the dark material of his shirt.

he smiled hesitantly at you, dusting himself off before stepping out into the living space. “hi y/n. it’s been a while.” you scoffed lightly. of course you missed him dearly, but he hadn’t tried to reconnect with you for four years! what could he possibly want now that you were moved to america, and almost over him.

“what are you doing here?” you asked, folding your arms over your chest. he expected a bit of a more happy reaction, but he couldn’t be that surprised, he knew he messed up that day.

“i’m sorry. i came to apologize and hopefully win you back. i- i know i messed up, i know i didn’t- i didn’t give you a proper goodbye and i’m so sorry. but i still love you. i’m still deeply, deeply in love with you. there wasn’t a passing day when i didn’t think about you. i’ll explain why and what happened if you’ll give me another chance.” he concluded, reaching out to touch your arm, his attempt at being affectionate.

you looked at him, wondering if, maybe you should give him another chance. or at the very least let him explain himself. you smiled very lightly, thinking back to your past memories. “fine. one chance.”

he smiled brightly at you, as you ushered him to sit on the sofa next to you. you looked up at him expectantly as he gathered his thoughts. he really didn’t think he was going to get this far.

“well, when i brought you out of that bloody mansion, i brought you to ronald weasley. i thought for sure he would know what to do. and he did, obviously, you’re okay now. and then after i made sure you were okay i went back to find my mother and we left.” he let out a shaky breath, but continued. “but there were still so many things happening with my father being put in trial that none of us could reach out via letters, and then i found out you left to america, and i thought you did that to get away from me, so i left you alone. and then for some reason i decided i needed to see you. so, here i am.”

you nodded lightly, understanding his reasonings for the most part.

“would you just give me another chance? i found this amazing muggle coffee shop down here, i figured maybe we could start over. like a second first date.” he suggested as she nodded with a light smile.

“i’d like that. a second first date.”

[ambitionsource]

also 001 zc im springing it all on u

spring it all on me baybee. i’m ready. i’m thrivin

Zay & Charlie

When I started shipping it if I did: oh if i were a viewer, i think i’d be sniffing out this storyline EARLY. literally from the moment charlie leaps up to volunteer to tutor him in 103 and then is all “you’re so unapologetically yourself” with all that Awe i’d be like... mhm. okay. mhm ok mhm mhm mhm right mhm....... although i think i would be skeptical. i would be kinda like (as i think some of you were) are they actually going to go through with this...... are they playing me 4 a fool.... but then when you watch 112 after so much build and theres the RUNNING ACROSS THE CITY TO GET TO THE AUDITION AND AINT NOOOO AWWWYWYWYWYWYAAYWAAYYYYY AND THE LOUVRE KISS LIKE WAHAHAHWAHWAHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHH -- yeah i’d be in it from there. you don’t see it coming going INTO the first season, but to be honest zc kind of Owned the first season in the later half there. they were subtle in some ways but then they really just brought the mf PUNCH

My thoughts: so. clearly. i love them. fdkjshgkjsg i think i have a lot of fondness for them because they really organically blossomed in the first season in a way i wasn’t expecting. as y’all know, we broke the story for the second season first and then backtracked to s1, and i will be candid... charlie was like... not a person when we first outlined s2 JFGDSKLGKDFGKLFDH. he was in a relationship with zay, and it was supposed to be this big surprise going into the second season, but otherwise we really didn’t like... know what to do with him or honestly had THOUGHT about it. but then as we started working on s1, he just kind of... emerged, as well as their storyline of barely acquaintances to friends to unexpected lovers. and i really really love what they grew to be. they’ve been one of the best parts of writing the show tbh and i have so much fun writing their scenes, even when they’re challenging (cough 208 cough, one of the most difficult scenes i’ve ever written in anything ever)

What makes me happy about them: i love how they see the other person for who they actually are, how they can cut through the bullshit and see the other for how they wish they could be seen (charlie seeing zay as more than the popular “cool” kid that he has to put on as a sort of defense to survive at aaa, and zay seeing charlie for who he actually is beneath all of the facades he’s created to please the rest of the world) and how that allows them the courage to try and actually BE those things. like. charlie may not have ever gotten to a point of really considering accepting his own sexuality if it weren’t for zay, i think -- especially since zay then gave him this incredibly SAFE space to figure it out AND loved him at the same time. i love how they demonstrate such a Balance for one another (there’s that key word again!), like how in s1 a core part of their friendship is the fact that charlie seems to be the only person zay really has who cares about all the things he cares about but also isn’t... a crazy monster the way everyone at aaa is fDJSKFLDG. and zay brings balance to charlie in showing him its okay to have fun, to be imperfect, to throw a swear word around or not give a damn sometimes or do things just because he wants to. and that’s important! that’s major! and then i just love love love how they’re playful with one another but it comes from this very sincere fond place. their dynamic would not be what it is without their sort of teasing nature, but it NEVER feels like it’s coming from a place of animosity, it’s always this affectionate kind of banter. i’m really picky about how teasing translates into romance, and i think the way they make it work is a fave thing about them for me. i’m forgetting like 4324325 things i wanna say here but i love them MUCHO

What makes me sad about them: so. hm. yeah. you know how there are those otp ask games or gif memes and there’s always that category that’s like “it’s right, just not right now” ships? i have always disliked that category bc i think people constantly misinterpret it (or its just a poor label to apply to a ship lmao), but i think they are actually a perfect example of what i think that label is supposed to represent. charlie and zay are 100% right, but not right now. they can’t be right when charlie is still trying to figure out so much of his sexuality and his sense of acceptance, because no matter how much they love each other it’s just not fair to zay to have all these conditions on their relationship. like, it’s great that he likes him enough to be okay with it, but it shouldn’t be that way in a truly healthy situation. yknow? and when the rules keep changing or grow to be confusing (i.e. how charlie seemed to be improving in 207 but then backslid majorly in 208), you end up with like... well, miscommunications like 208. and those can be brutal.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: again, i’m just projecting based on my experience in fandom and observing fandom, but here are a handful of things i think would be common in zc fic that would drive me up the wall. 1) babying and/or pandering charlie to the point that he’s just like... this uwu baby gay that completely strips him of his complexity, surprisingly sharp sarcasm, all his uneven edges and quirks, etc. 2) fetishizing of them both or more specifically, racism surrounding the portrayal of zay 3) a complete bashing of charlie’s faith, as that goes against how he’s written + his arc as a character [ like if you gotta work thru ur own grievances with organized religion then by all means, but it would probably bother me bc of his characterization and im literally not even religious lmao ] 4) banter that crosses the line and goes into that territory of lowkey bullying or tasteless that is a squick for me

Things I look for in fanfic: so of course, characterization that allows for the complexity of both of their characters would be A1 from day one as usual. would always love something that highlights the dance thing since that is... so important to their relationship in the show lmao. people who could capture their delicate balance of banter would be whew!!!! also random but i thought about it earlier today -- when winter olympics rolls around again, who is gonna write the ice skating au? it’s only a step or two away from dance y’all, let’s SEE IT!!!

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: zay would make the best of any relationship he gets into, but he and riley could be cute as i have mentioned before (altho i naturally prefer them as best friends, but they would treat each other the way they deserve which is important). there’s a character coming in s4 who i actually really enjoy with zay, but that’s a spoiler and neither here nor there... as for charlie, i again will make my vague comment about appreciating lucas x charlie... and that’s all i can say on that.............

My happily ever after for them: god i just. i want them to be happy and in love. and i mean that in that they’re happy with themselves, so they can be happy with one another. like, TRULY happy without all these conditions or strings attached. and to be able to be happy together IN PUBLIC. literally can you imagine. CAN YOU IMAGINE??

Who is the big spoon/little spoon: hmmmmmm again, i think it would vary. but i think my inclination is that typically zay is the big spoon, although i will say i think charlie is overall more cuddly (not that you’d ever assume so in public bc he’s so repressed DSJKFJDSKLGFDLKG)

What is their favorite non-sexual activity: i assume we wanna discuss the ones... that aren’t dance DJSKLFJDKGJFDLKJGKDJHLKDH. aside from the obvious, i really do think zay and charlie like to go out and explore together and just like... share experiences. like going to art museums is a big one, and seeing live performances. art is something that really connects them and i don’t think that can be understated, and one of their favorite things is experiencing art together and then getting the other to talk about their opinions on it. i also do think that while zay isn’t big on literature, he can be swayed if charlie reads to him. art completely aside, i think they like to go to the grand central market and browse / try new things. they also like window shopping, but that’s kind of funny bc their styles are so different so they’ll be like ooh and the other will be like rly. FDNSJKFDJSLGJDSG. omg they should have a day where they just get to dress the other person up all day in different stores... THERES a fun activity... zay is dressed head to toe in GAP and he’s like please set me on fire fJDSKFJDSKLGJKDLFG

send some winter hiatus asks !! or try this one

[zirawrites]

companions react to a reader who is always there for them and comforts them whenever they're feeling vulnerable/hurt/sad.

To quote Taylor Swift… “Honey I rose up from the grave, I do it all the time.” Ya fave fic writer Zira is back with another reaction! I finished my last summer classes, I’m home from England and ready to start being active again. I apologize if I’m rusty, I haven’t done a proper reaction in nearly six months. But I’m tryn’ for y’all!!!!

What really got me back in to reactions is reading some awesome fanfics recently. So as always, my inbox is open and I’ll be working away on my AO3 account for my first full-length fic!

TRIGGER WARNING: This post briefly mentions suicide in Preston’s reaction.

Cait: Before Cait met Sole, she only saw herself as someone who deserved the shite hand she was dealt. Almost immediately after they left the combat zone, it became apparent that Sole didn’t just see Cait as a companion: they really cared about her. Whenever Cait threw a bottle against the bar to pick a fight, Sole was there to defuse the situation. After Cait got them thrown out of Diamond City for calling Myrna “a right ol’ synth fucker,” Sole didn’t get frustrated (probably they were just relieved neither were arrested). Even in her darkest hours of getting sober, Sole was there to stroke her hair and keep her hydrated while she shook in bed.

It took time, but eventually Cait got used to Sole’s gentle touch and soft words. In fact, sometimes Cait acted out just to feel Sole brush the coarse hair from her sweating forehead to place a chaste kiss on it. Cait learned to bite her tongue over minor things like a drifter from Goodneighbor rudely asking for a shag, which pleased Sole. It made the moments Sole embraced her bruised and bloody body after a fight that much sweeter.

Codsworth: Being a Mr. Handy didn’t exempt Codsworth from the woes of life. In fact, the poor robot was probably the most likely companion to be frazzled in Sole’s company. Every time Sole ran too fast or used their fist over a silver tongue in tough situations, Codsworth blew a fuse. Well, not really. He was General Atomic’s finest, thank you very much. The reason Codsworth let Sole get away with so much mayhem was because he knew they always soothed his aching metallic heart after the fighting was over.

When Codsworth was stressed over being dragged along on a dangerous quest, Sole would stop in the shadows of the city and place their hand on his metal side. They let him rant about how foolish they were being. Weren’t they afraid of raiders? Radscorpions? Rogue synths? He would ramble on, his shaky words eventually trailing off as Sole’s thumb ran over the rust stains on his paint. They would tell Codsworth that they always came back unscathed, didn’t they? Codsworth would sigh and say that was debatable, but he trusted their judgement. How could he stay cross with his master/mistress?

Curie: Since becoming a synth, Curie would get overwhelmed with the new emotions she felt. The others in Sanctuary would poke fun at her for constantly overreacting, but Sole knew she just needed a little more tender love and care. When Curie was mad, she was beyond consolable. She would stomp around Sanctuary with balled fists and snap at the slightest transgression (a moment of silence for Sturges asking Curie to help paint the workbench). If Curie was wrapped up in a romance novel Sole had snatched her from a mission, she would curl up under the blankets and sob in to a box of pre-war tissues. For someone with such grace and poise, Curie was a wicked hurricane of emotion.

Sole could always get her to calm down with a voice of reason. They would remind Curie that the characters in her novels weren’t real. That you can’t solve every injustice in the world. And sometimes an innocent Sturges really did need help painting. Curie would take some deep breaths, and occasionally asked Sole to hold her hand. After thinking the situation over, Curie was back to her normal (albeit odd) self, and Sole would prepare for her next confusing emotion to surface.

Danse: Unfortunately for Danse, he really thought he could hide away his emotions. He had a terrible habit of scrunching his unkempt eyebrows when frustrated. If Danse was hurt by someone’s words, he ducked his head down for a few moments to fight back tears. For someone who guarded their heart so closely, Danse was in some ways an open book.

Whenever Danse needed to be vulnerable around Sole, he would try his damnedest to use words. Instead of shrugging his pain off, Danse would grit his teeth and talk about a depressing failed mission or recent nightmare. His favorite response from Sole was when they leaned in to listen closer and he could feel their breath on his neck. He wasn’t the cuddliest in the Commonwealth, but just seeing Sole being attentive to his needs put him in lighter spirits.

Deacon: Everybody’s favorite Egg Man was the hardest companion to crack. Deacon went out of his way to make sure Sole didn’t notice his sour mood. There were times a situation exasperated him, and he’d slip up to make a soft sigh. But those moments were rare. Usually if Deacon felt upset, his first instinct was to crack a joke. He needed other people to laugh as if his life depended on it. Maybe then they wouldn’t see his lips quiver. His posture stiffen. The grey cloud forming over his head.

However, that didn’t mean he didn’t always let Sole in. When his partner pried enough, Deacon would sit them down to vent. Sole would keep a respectable distance, but occasionally placed a reaffirming hand on his shoulder. Minor physical contact, but all of their attention on his story. Just knowing that Sole gave a shit was enough for him to collect his thoughts, boop his partners nose, and tell them it was time to get back to work. He was truly an enigma.

Dogmeat: The lucky German Shepherd had the most attentive master in the world. Sole knew what every individual bark or whimper out of Dogmeat’s mouth meant. When he couldn’t find an irradiated animal to chase on their walk? Sole would start sprinting to Red Rocket truck station for him to go after them. A crack of lightning during a rad storm? Sole was already on the ground supplying an ample amount of bully rubs. There was never a moment the dog felt unloved. After all, Sole was constantly reminding him that he was a good boy.

Gage: The first few times Sole tried to calm Gage down they were met with a prompt, “Aw, fuck off, boss!” Gage really only had one emotion, and it was anger. He took the longest to warm up to Sole, especially because whenever he did show his softer side it made him feel… vulnerable. Gage couldn’t punch his way through a heavy heart.

Whenever he did tell Sole about his childhood, he would stop every few minutes to make sure they were listening. Despite Sole’s initial assumption, Gage did like the occasional physical touch. When Gage was in a mood, Sole would run their hand down his arm or give his hip a light bump. He would blush, and Sole tried their best not to smile like an absolute idiot at their triumph. Gage always scoffed at his Overboss going soft on him, but it did keep him out of a few unnecessary bar fights.

Hancock: Mayor John “Puppy Dog Eyes” Hancock. Hancock never wanted to bring down the mood, but he felt completely comfortable sharing his feelings with Sole. His favorite tactic Sole used was when they ran their finger tips up and down his arm while he wore his coat. Hancock never relished in Sole having to touch his scarred flesh, but the feeling of Sole’s fingernails over the fabric of his favorite outfit was strangely calming. 

Hancock always had a flair for the dramatic, and Sole used this to their advantage to calm him down. Whatever exaggerated story he had to complain about, Sole always offered a crazy solution. Were raiders trying to extort money from the Goodneighbor drifters? The two of them should sic the entire Minutemen army on them. When Hancock was insecure about his ghoulish appearance, why didn’t Curie just whip up an anti-ghoulification serum? Sole’s antics always made Hancock chuckle, and then purr when Sole gave him an affectionate squeeze. They reminded him the two of them had time to sit down and think of a plan, and worrying didn’t exactly help his “King of the Zombies” reputation.

MacCready: Unbeknownst to MacCready, his boss had seen through the tough guy act at The Third Rail immediately. But over the course of their friendship, MacCready learned to let his guard down. He was more emotional than he let on. Every time MacCready broke down in front of Sole, he was reminded that he wasn’t alone. Most of MacCready’s rough nights were losing sleep over Duncan. Sole would lay down next to him and talk about their plans for pre-war Shaun. About how Nate/Nora insisted on homeschooling, but they wanted to send him off to private school. How they hoped he inherited their light freckles and sense of humor. MacCready would start to talk about how Duncan had his eyes, and then the conversation would go off from there. As long as Sole kept MacCready calm and distracted, he was able to relax his rugged shoulders and drift off to sleep. 

Preston: Despite his soft demeanor, Preston is battling an arsenal of demons. When Sole learned about his suicidal past, they made sure that they always approached his low mood swings with care. Sole knew those types of feelings don’t always immediately go away, so they made sure whenever they talked to Preston about his depression in a safe space. It sometimes was the chambers of the Castle, or even at the picnic bench behind Sanctuary. Whenever Sole wanted Preston to feel loved, they took the time to get him alone and really listen to his troubles. Whenever Sole squeezed his hand and told him they were proud, Preston couldn’t hide his swelling chest.

Piper: It was no secret that Piper was high-strung. Not only did she have a business to run, but there was a little sister always nipping at her heels. Sometimes the responsibility got overwhelming, even for Diamond City’s greatest reporter. During the times Piper felt like the world was crashing down, Sole got Nick or Ellie to babysit Nat. They would turn on the radio, grab a bottle of (albeit cheap) wine, and let Piper unload on them. The reporter would pace around her office screaming about a false lead or uncooperative interviewee, then take a gulp of her drink. This would go on until Piper felt a little buzzed, and she was forced to retire to the couch.

That was when Sole would soften the mood. Sole would play with Piper’s hair or hum a pre-war song that made Piper sigh in to her friend’s shoulder. “Damn, Blue,” Piper sometimes whispered. “Life’s always a little lighter with my favorite popsicle around.” Her jests didn’t phase Sole, who returned their friend’s joke with an elbow to the arm.

Nick: Nick only likes to show his ruffled feathers around Sole when they’re alone in the office. He’d lean back in his chair, hang his hat on the nearby rack, and blink up at his partner with concerned yellow eyes. Sole knew that was Nick’s way of saying he needed some reassurance that the world wasn’t going to blow up (again).

During Nick’s vulnerable moments, Sole would try to talk about anything positive. Literally anything. Maybe Dogmeat had sat still for his weekly bath, or Shaun drew them a fridge-worthy picture. Nick’s posture would visibly relax, and he would get lost in some happy news for once. Sometimes he wouldn’t notice Sole was trying to calm him down. When he occasionally did catch on, Nick would never call Sole out. Instead, he’d add an anecdote of his own, like how he caught Ellie humming his favorite song as she cleaned the office.

Strong: Strong was easy to piss off, but just as simple to calm down if you knew the right thing to say. Whenever Strong got upset it was obvious to even the dumbest supermutant. He would try to get a rise out of Sole by calling them weak, or charging out ahead of them during a fight. To settle Strong down, Sole just needed to tell him in layman’s terms he wasn’t completing his mission. They couldn’t find the milk of human kindness if he kept acting out.

Strong never actually sought real emotional advice or showed any signs of being discouraged, but if he did Sole would be ready with open arms.

X6-88: Just because X6 is reserved doesn’t mean he doesn’t share his feelings. In fact, X6 is blunt about everything, including his current state of mind. Whenever X6 comes to Sole and says his morale is low, Sole reminds him of what an asset he is to the Commonwealth. How strong his passion for making the future safer helps Sole’s own optimism. When X6 feels useful, he almost always feels better. There was even an occasion where Sole almost heard X6 thank them for a pep talk.

[undercovermcdfan]

the right impressions | vylance

summary: Dad AU. First introductions is everything. Vylance. Ensemble piece.

a/n: so y’all know the Dad AU—either from my own yelling/fics or @crybabytime’s beautiful comics (click here to go through her tag!), and honestly? I want to make a full-fledged, multi-chaptered fic of  it one day. For now, here’s a fic featuring Laurance reintroducing Vylad as his partner to the kids and their reactions. Lowkey, I’ll probably will write a drabble about Zenix & Laurance’s talk

warning(s): divorce ment.

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Laurance’s reassuring voice did little to ease his nerves.

“Just act as you normally do—Vylad, they love you,” Laurance said, albeit a little distracted as the clanks and shuffling of the kitchen in the background, “Maybe even more than me.”

Normally, the little statement at the end would make him chuckle and rolled his eyes affectionately. Though the sincerity of Laurance’s tone tempted him to believe in it, believe his reassuring lie… Vylad felt his cynical side jab at the misuse of love in this situation.

Did Laurance’s kids like him? Maybe. But love, he wasn’t sure.

They saw him now and again, though his travels thanks to work kept him from being a constant visitor in the household. They knew him as Uncle Vylad—to the three younger children, he was called this because he was a friend of Laurance; Zenix, the eldest, knew he was their other father… ex-father…? err, Garroth’s youngest brother and was their actual uncle. The friendly face who helped occasionally and had dinners whenever spare time allowed it; he honestly wondered if they could see him as something, something more.

Travis’s eyes always lit up joyfully when he came around, but curiosity and soft-hearted was his nature.

Isabel, while warming up to him slower than Travis, looked to him with admiration and didn’t hesitate to greet him now with open arms.

Malachi was only a baby, and he wasn’t sure if babies really have the “hate” and “love” idea down pat; but even with his little experience, the mild-mannered child still smiled and felt at ease with his presence, so that must’ve meant something.

Only child who looked to him with suspicion, keeping his distance… was Zenix. Though the nature of his and Laurance’s relationship wasn’t revealed yet, with how Zenix acted around him almost made Vylad wonder—did he know already? When the other children expressed their approval in their own way, Zenix’s judgmental eyes were the ones who reminded Vylad that the statement of ‘They love you’ was faulty.

But he couldn’t drag his feet forever.

This was long overdue— and it would be a strange to admit to his boyfriend of the past year that the only reason he’s having cold feet was thanks to his perceptive son.

If it weren’t for genuine nervousness and anxiety feeding thoughts of ‘is this too big of a change? Maybe it’s too soon.’, he’d almost laugh at the absurdity—wasn’t it in most relationships, the parents were the nerve-racking obstacle one would fret over? Not a seven-year-old child with eyes that almost feel although they could pick apart his weakness.

He breathed in, shifting the flowers in his hands as he reached to press the doorbell.

He breathed out.

Laurance’s voice echo in his mind: Just act as you normally do.

Safe to say the flowers didn’t lasted so long.

Travis and Isabel immediately asked for them after they shouted hellos and hugged his legs, nearly knocking him over; they greedily reached up, blues and greens brightly shone with wide smiles—and in truth, Vylad was a weak man and quickly conceded the flowers to the kids.

The house was filled with a delicious smell—which meant, as usual, the dinner won’t disappoint. Eventually, Laurance poked his head into the hall way, hair tied into a bun and bangs pushed back by a headband as he wiped his hands onto his apron; his face, similarly to Travis and Isabel, lit up, though with a little relief mixed in.

“Always one for punctuality, huh,” Laurance mused, stepping into the hall and halfway meeting Vylad for a tight hug, “I’m going to put the finishes touches to dinner—make yourself comfortable, the kids already set the table.”

“Oh, I-I’ll do that, um,” Vylad then sighed, “I’m sorry, though.”

“Hm?” Laurance pulled away, brows furrowed.

“I brought flowers but…”

Laurance nodded in understanding, “You let Isabel and Travis bully them away from you.”

Vylad wrinkled his nose, his frown turning into a slight pout as he muttered, “I wasn’t bullied… they’re simply convincing.”

Laurance laughed, almost leaning in to press a kiss to his forehead but a sudden ringing sounded and he straighten. “That’s dinner timer— can you tell Isa and Travis to wash up, and head for the table after?”

Vylad nodded, faltering slightly as he watched Laurance disappeared back into the kitchen with hurried steps. I wonder which way those two we—

His eyes locked onto another gaze, one that was watching from the stairs. No, not just watching. Glaring. Zenix, who pressed his lips into a thin line, sat on the stairway with arms crossed. Like his siblings and father, he was dressed nicely in a clean button up and black pants; he didn’t say anything and continued to glare for another moment.

“Um, hello Zenix,” Vylad started awkwardly, offering a small smile, “I… um… You should probably head to the dinner table. I’ll handle Isabel and Travis.”

Nothing.

Zenix simply avert his eyes to his feet, brows furrowed and simply ignoring him. Vylad sighed.

He didn’t know what to say—what could he say? He could only leave Zenix to his thoughts, making a mental note of the behavior. While Zenix never expressed overt liking of Vylad’s presence, the upset sight of him was… worrying and maybe his theory of the eldest already being aware was true.

But he can’t dwell on it for now.

Tracking down the little rascals was easy, as the two didn’t go far—they took apart the bouquet in no time, so that was a lost cause. He found Travis and Isabel giggling as they slowly bending the stalks of the flowers into a flower crowns (or rather, attempting to). Vylad smiled and patted their heads as they proudly showed off their half-made crowns, but the two hungry enough to abandon their project when he said Laurance wanted them to wash up before dinner.

Zenix wasn’t on the stairs when the three walked by again. Instead, Zenix was waiting at the table, a seat closest to Malachi’s highchair as the elder fussed over the baby’s bib… and acting a little more subdued than usual. Vylad’s eyes narrowed for a moment. Strange.

He didn’t meet with his eyes, hopping off to the kitchen without even a word. Vylad tried to search in recent memory—either from his own actions or events that Laurance told him, what would be upsetting Zenix.

But as he tried to get Travis and Isabel settled, he came up with nothing.

Dinner with Laurance was always an eventful fare—but with his children, it went from a sweet gesture they rarely could took delight in to a display of what a warm family was.

From Travis’s need to tell Vylad everything about what he missed since the last his visit and what his best friend from next door, Katelyn, showed him recent, to Isabel proudly showing off the fact she could count farther than her brother despite being the younger of the two, to Malachi’s babbles and absolutely destruction of his food as he mushed it against his face (which got the entire table laughing).

Even Vylad told some stories, interrupted every few minutes about questions of the places he visited and sometimes going off in tangents such as: “Wait, they have elephants in Asia too?” “But he said they’re itty-bitty small kind.” “So, like baby elephants.” “No, no—they’re not babies!” “I feel like I know what itty-bitty means; they’re baby ‘phants!”.

Yet Laurance nor Vylad missed the fact there was one voice who didn’t join in the conversation as much as the rest. Zenix sat at his seat, pushing around the food quietly—and though Laurance kept the smiles up, it would slip away every now and again, a worried gaze landing on the quiet eldest.

Eventually, dinner wrapped up and the table was cleared with the help of Vylad—it was a few moments they had, while Laurance told the kids to wait at the table rather than running off immediately for their hour of freedom before bed.

“Are you ready?” Laurance whispered to him, taking his hand gingerly and Vylad intertwine their fingers, giving the hold a squeeze.

“Yes, but,” Vylad frowned, “Do you think they’ll understand?”

“Well, we waited a year… and I know neither of us think this is a fling, Vylad,” Laurance softly smiled, placing a kiss on his knuckles, “Relax. They’re smart cookies—they’ll understand.”

They returned, hand in hand, neither Travis or Isabel noticed at first… but Zenix did, and frowned immediately.

“Da-ad, can we go?” Travis, slouching and slowly slipping out of his seat, started to whine.

Isabel shushed him, with a quick berate, “Don’t sit like that, you goof!”

“I’m not a goof! You are!” Travis immediately retorted, an offended look written on the child’s face.

“Nu-uh! You’re the one who’s sitting like that—Dad said we have to wait!” Isabel chided him.

“Goody two-shoes!”

“Goofy bad boy—“

“Isabel, Travis—please. What did I say about calling each other bad names?” Laurance looked at the two, who immediately lowered their eyes in guilt, “This is a special night— one that’s almost finished. So please, say sorry to each other.”

Both glanced at each other, shoulders slumped, as they give a unison “Sorry.”

“Hmm, we’ll work on apologies later—both of you owe a hug to each other for the bad names,” Laurance mused while the two kids nodded, pouting a little now but their mood not completely soured, thankfully; instead they turned their eyes to their father and himself, curious.

Laurance shifted back into a bright smile, “I have special news,” he wrapped an arm around his shoulders, carefully looking from child to child—both Isabel and Travis met with their father’s eyes while Zenix distracted himself while holding Malachi. Laurance paused at this, only for a moment, before he pushed on—“You know, Uncle Vylad is a really good friend, very nice and sweet one at that.”

Travis nodded, while Isabel tilted her head. Vylad carefully watched Zenix, who tensed a little as he frowned, keeping his eyes on Malachi.

“And… well, for a while, Uncle Vylad been more than that. I love him a lot—“ “—And I love your father—“ “…yes. We love each other very much, and we been more than friends. A special friend, even.”

Isabel immediately raised her hand, calling out excitedly, “So you’re dating?”

Laurance’s brows raised immediately, his voice not hiding his surprise, “Isabel, where did you learn that word?”

“From Granny Zianna’s TV shows!”

Travis then raised his hand, interrupting Laurance before he could think twice about that statement. “Does this mean Uncle Vylad is our papa too?”

“It’s complicated… but…” Laurance glanced at Vylad, who returned his searching look with a soft smile. “I’m fine with it. But I’m okay if you still want to say uncle as well.”

“Do you kiss?” Isabel called out, squinting at the two.

Laurance sputtered, “Isabel, no. I’m going to have a talk with Granny about what you’re watching, missy.”

Vylad chuckled, winking at Isabel as he nodded. “Your dad is shy, forgive him.”

Travis then waved his arm excitedly, “Will you get married?”

There’s a pause. Laurance glanced at him while Vylad’s brows immediately shot up; well… the question wasn’t a new one, when they passed the one year mark, his own mother asked curiously if they were. But before either could open their mouths to answer, Zenix spoke up finally.

“They can’t!”

The table fell silent as all eyes were on Zenix, who bristled under the attention. “Dad can’t! He has us—he doesn’t need to get married again, or need you!” His arms shifting Malachi, pointing an accusing finger at Vylad, and though the kid’s words stung, nothing was worse than the glassiness of Zenix’s gaze, his voice shaking a little, “Dad is just fine, we’re fine! We don’t need a second dad, w-we already… have…” Zenix’s voice started to die, and Isabel’s hand reached out in concern but he jerked away. Sliding out of his seat and placing Malachi on the floor (who let out a whine), they watched Zenix dart despite his siblings and father called out for him.

“Vylad, I—“

“Go. I’ll watch the kids, don’t worry.”

Laurance shot him a thankful look, before removing himself and chasing after his eldest. Travis and Isabel looked worriedly in their direction while Vylad picked up Malachi, rocking the gurgling child with a sinking feeling in his stomach.

Despite the fact… he didn’t have anything to feel exactly guilty for, part of him thought: I should’ve guessed what Zenix was moody about.

He was a smart kid after all—smarter than most would give the child credit. Ushering the kids upstairs, they changed into something more pajamalike and settling in Malachi’s room, as they wait…

Vylad sighed, watching the clock pass the twenty-minute mark. The children—apart from Malachi, of course—were as antsy as him, because Laurance or Zenix haven’t made an appearance.

Zenix’s outbursts weren’t a common thing seen by Travis or Isabel; at least to a serious degree, where he was driven to tears. But then again, Vylad was perfectly aware the tough and protective big brother role the eldest inhabit.

He put Malachi down into his crib, as the child started to drift while an hour almost pass; and when he turned, there stood Travis behind him, slightly hiding behind a big picture book in his hands as he nervously looked up.

“Um…” Travis turned to him, holding a book in his hands, “Dad usually reads but... could you?”

He smiled a little, taking the book from his hands. “Of course,” Glancing at the cover, he recognized the familiar tale, “The Ugly Duckling?”

“Yeah. It’s my favorite,” Travis answered, settling on the floor and Vylad sitting down beside him, “I like the ending.”

“He likes happy endings,” Isabel corrected, abandoning the toys she was playing with and settling on one side and Travis shot her scowl.

But before he can retort, Vylad interrupted the brewing fight with a “Well I like happy endings. There’s nothing wrong with liking them.” Travis gave a look of triumph and Isabel shrugged, looking rather unbothered.

“So I’ll read this and you two promise to go to bed after? It’s almost your bed time.” Both children nodded, snuggling closer to get a good view of the pictures. Vylad began the tale, letting himself get lost in the fairy tale as well.

It was only when Vylad came down, after putting Isabel and Travis in their respective beds, did he find Laurance and Zenix.

Or rather Laurance and fast-asleep Zenix, held by his father.

Both look drained, but when Laurance caught his eye, he gave a victory look as he rubbed Zenix’s back. “He doesn’t hate you.”

Vylad nodded, sitting down beside him on the couch. “I know that.”

“He’s just confused… he’s not as open to the idea because he remembers Ga.. your brother as his other dad,” Laurance said softly, “And he’s afraid.”

Vylad scooted closer and leaned against Laurance as he shut his eyes. “Afraid?”

“He doesn’t want me to get hurt, if you want a summary,” Laurance mused, looking down at Zenix with a gentle expression, “He acts carefree, but deep down he’s soft-hearted kid.”

“Like father, like son, I suppose?”

Laurance chuckled, nudging Vylad slightly before leaning his cheek against Vylad’s head. “I’m not that soft.” Vylad’s brow twitched for a moment and Laurance laughed again, insisting now, “You see me get emotional one time—“

“One?”

“A couple of times, and now I’m stuck with these labels,” he sighed mockingly, “Even though I let you get away with it every single time.”

“It’s because you’re soft,” Vylad pointed out, and Laurance’s nose wrinkled as he frowned.

Silence fell, though comforting and only sounds was the occasional mumbles from Zenix’s sleep.

But it didn’t last long, Laurance’s tone changing to worry as he absentmindedly rubbed soothing circles. “He needs some time, Vylad. He gone through a rough two years and… it being hard for me, I can’t imagine what he’s feeling,” Laurance softly said. “Garroth hasn’t been keeping up lately with his end of the deal, now this? It’s overwhelming.”

“…Should we… you know?” Vylad felt his heart tighten for a moment, his eyes opening and he started to pull away but Laurance’s hand stopped him.

“No! No, no—I’m not going to break up with you,” letting go of his arm and instead touching his cheek, Laurance’s eyes had determination in them, “Zenix is afraid but we just need to reassure that this change isn’t bad.”

“What if he doesn’t… well, like me?”

“He likes you, he’s just… shy about it,” both glance at the sleeping boy, and Laurance pressed a kiss to his forehead, “He always been a grumpy child, but I know him and he talks about you when you’re not here.”

Vylad pursed his lips, the corners curling up, “I hope good things.”

“It’s good things,” Laurance nudged him again, “He likes your pancakes. And your cool hair.”

“Don’t you like those things too?”

Laurance laughed, “Well, maybe you’re just a cool hair and pancakes kind of guy? It’s a very charming point, I must say.”

Vylad then laughed. “Of course you would.” And Laurance joined him.

Maybe they don’t have everything figured out now—but a step forward was a step forward. And surprisingly… he wasn’t discouraged.

“You know, I do have a question.”

Vylad hummed, prompting for Laurance to continue.

“Are you really alright with the kids calling you Dad too? I know you said it’s okay but… if it isn’t comfortable…”

Vylad lowered his eyes, feeling his cheeks grow warm—well he almost forgotten he gave his okay to that. “It’s… nice. I don’t mind,” he admitted, “They’re good kids, and if we’re taking this further… it’s a logical next step.”

“Vylad, technically they don’t have to call you dad unless we’re married.  You’re skipping a few steps,” Laurance gave a teasing grin, “Unless you were planning on purposing right this moment.”

There’s a pause. Laurance’s smile faded for a moment, him fully turning to face him properly but then huffed when he noticed the sparkle in Vylad’s eyes.

“Vylad.”

He chuckled as Laurance pinched the bridge of his nose, heaving a sigh. “I’m sorry. But… it’s reassuring to see you a little excited.” Laurance shot him a side-long glare, shifting Zenix in his arms. “That was a mean-spirited joke,” Laurance whined, standing up, “I know I said it was too soon for marriage… I wouldn’t have... um…”

“You wouldn’t have turned me down?”

Laurance avoided his amused stare, and stammered out, “I-I’m going to put Zenix in his bed. You earned yourself dish duty for that joke.”

“Alright,” Vylad stood, rubbing his neck, and Laurance shook his head, turned to head up the stairs; he smiled, “I wonder if it’s a joke if a part of it was true.”

The stairs creaking stopped for a moment. Though Vylad couldn’t see his expression, he knew Laurance heard him. And he knew Laurance wouldn’t want him to see the fact he gotten him, as he hurried up the rest of the steps.

Truthfully, if Zenix didn’t have the outburst, a part of Vylad knew he would’ve answered Travis’s question Will you get married with a “I hope so.”

Because he did.

Just as he worried over the kids liking him, not as an uncle, but as a potential person to… well… join their family, Vylad saw marriage was already on the table. And as he headed to the kitchen, with Laurance’s reaction… it’s reassuring to know it was on his as well.