#I mean I'm sure I made some too since the story was made in 2018 or 19 but even then timelines are confusing

[creativecuteness]

Man, now that you point this out, I realize I made some massive mistakes in the timeline when making my Dawn of the Bloodsuckers story. (And yes I know the timeline of events is up for interruption, but I really should have known from context clues that this happened on the first day of school.)

This is how I placed the events in the fic.

Erica was hired five days after the incident, Erica said in Blue Moon that Ethen's Parents go out on Fridays though considering the series wasn't even written yet I should have known that detail wouldn't even be relevant.

The context clues were there too. Ethen telling Benny their social lives will be determined depending on how they behave for the next few days. The way they acted when Rory greeted them; (Unless they were actively avoiding him throughout the week which I doubt, since that boy is persistent. And Ethen's not the type to abandon people anyway; even though it seems he lowkey wanted to ghost Rory and Benny who wasn't helping his status at all.) XD

But that also arises some issues for Dakota and Rory's relationship.

In the fic I had Dakota fall head over heels after he saved her from a chemistry class incident which happened on Monday; while I had the first act of the movie and the dusk screening happen on Friday. With this new information that would mean.

Dakota fell in love, confessed and lost Rory all in the span of 8 to 9 hours like dang love hit her hard only to lose him later. though I liked having Dakota and Mabel wait a few days to see Rory again it makes the reunion and relief that much stronger.

But this would also mean Erica and Rory became vampires on the first day of school. Did they skip a few days or something? because it seems Rory didn't show up till after school and Erica wasn't around for a while either. I guess they were busy getting the vampire makeover package which looked awesome on them by the way. Lol

But I do have an issue with the screening being implied on Monday. Wouldn't it make more sense to have it on Friday or Saturday, I mean the theater was packed with Highschooler's who would have to go to school the next morning. Plus, Principal Hick's had to answer to news reporters about the ordeal. So, either A the ending took place a few days later (Which I doubt.) Or B word traveled very fast. (The more I think about it the more I feel my fanon timeline makes the events of the movie feel more spread out and natural. Let me know what you think.)

Either way I am rambling and looking way too deep into this. When I remaster my fic, I don't think I'll change the order of events maybe change dialog a bit to showcase the change, but I actually like my fic's timeline and it works for what it is. But man, this movie has some plot holes.

just thinking about how ethan's parents were out on a school night and made a highschool girl stay at their house to babysit their 14 year old son til like 1 am

[pixiedustjellicle]

I have such a difficult time connecting with the Cats community now. Part of me feels like maybe I'm too old for the current fandom(I don't feel old, but I'm certainly not 19 anymore). Or that perhaps it's because I don't much care about ships. Sometimes I worry that I intimidate people, and I'd hate that. Let me introduce myself and how Cats has shaped my life, and maybe I can find my people?

I first saw Cats at a tiny local theatre when I was eight. I fell in love with it, and even though I didn't have the movie yet, I spent months afterwards with just the poem book and highlights album. Eventually I got the 98 VHS too- and then another local theatre put it on when I was ten! I got to see it twice there. And afterwards, I made up my own attempt at a costume, turned our spare room into my attempt at the set, and put some chairs in there to put on the highlights show for some friends of my mother. The CD was worn out, I went on with the show, and they even gave me a card and a new CD afterwards- the London 2 disc set! Looking back, I think how embarrassing it probably was, but I was so happy and proud of myself in the moment. Two more years later, US Tour 5 came through Nashville, and I got to go and stagedoor for the first time. I wore a tail I made and one of the actresses told me I had a perfect Bombalurina tail twirl. For all those years, I worked Cats into school projects, I drew nothing else. My mom put up with it for so long, and I still thank her to this day.

And then I went into middle school. New school, new students, and I started getting bullied for it. I found other musicals I didn't get bullied for- Phantom, Wicked, and Sweeney- to latch onto, and I kinda put Cats in the back of my head. I still loved it, but my hyperfixation had waned thanks to mean kids, and other than occasionally watching the 1998 movie, I didn't think much of it for years.

But the US Tour 6 announced a date in Nashville. I hadn't seen the show in eight years, and I wasn't about to miss it. I had already started taking an interest in cosplay, but I'd never made a costume like that. I remembered admiring the CCDB as a kid though, and I told myself I was totally capable of making my own, just to go see the show in costume. And I did.

And the cast were SO sweet, and I started finding Cats fans on Instagram. I thought I could do better on the costume, so when the show stopped in Chattanooga a couple months later... I did it again.

The pandemic hit and I lost my job. Immediately I started getting work making Cats cosplays for others, and I haven't stopped since. And when the show resumed, I made an overnight trip to Memphis to dress up again!

And then, I saved until I could finally go see the Royal Caribbean production (front row all three performances), and got to cosplay on the cruise and get a picture on stage with the cast! This was absolutely everything to me, especially seeing the original choreography as opposed to the revival. I definitely cried. (I'm in the middle bottom row!)

I've gotten to make some costume pieces for three regional productions of Cats, in the Dominican Republic, Atlanta Georgia, and most recently Georgetown Texas. I've won some local cosplay contest with my costumes, too! And I'm lucky enough to own a few original pieces- though I've had to part with some too.

My love for this show has spanned just over 17 years now. I adore the story, the costumes, the choreography, the sets, and the characters. It's part of how I learned I am autistic. It's given me confidence I didn't know I could find. And every time I get to see it live, I feel like I'm where I belong. The fandom has felt quiet. And I'm not sure if that's just because I don't know where I fit in? So here's hoping I can find my tribe.

Favorite productions: Original Broadway, Moscow, and Mexico 2013/2018

Favorite Cats: Jemima/Sillabub, Bombalurina, Demeter, Munkustrap, Tumblebrutus, Jellylorum

Favorite songs: Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats, The Song of the Jellicles and the Jellicle Ball, Macavity

Favorite cats to cosplay: Etcetera and Victoria

[the-modern-typewriter]

Patreon, Apple and Admin

Hello

As some as you know, I have a Patreon account.

I have made this post already on Patreon, but in case you were considering joining I will share the post here too...(sorry for the spam if you're getting this twice!)

As some of you may also already be aware, Patreon is introducing some changes come November 2024, based on their relationship with Apple and the Apple IOS store specifically.

This means:

1. I will be switching to 'subscription billing' come November 2024.

2. The prices may increase if you are subscribing through an Apple device.

You can read Patreon's full guidance about Apple requirements and changes on their website, but here is my summary as it pertains to my Patreon/you:

1.  Switching to subscription billing

This won't change current subscriptions at all. You will continue getting charged on the first of every month.

If you subscribe after November 2024 then you will be charged on the date you join or rejoin and the same date again every month that follows.

I'm not 100% fond of this change from a creator perspective. Due to the way I post, this means I can't fully guarantee that everyone will get the exact same monthly experience like I can when it is based on a set calendar month. This is because while I follow a general schedule of posting 2-3 times a week for new stories, writing is a creative thing and some stories can take more or less time, so I do not always post on the exact same days each week.

I will put extra effort into consistency going forward, especially for the daily prompt calendar! This should make sure things are as fair for everyone as I can make them.

1.2. Yearly billing

Once on subscription billing, however, I can offer a yearly-subscription (annual membership, as Patreon calls it) if anyone is interested?

 This will help make sure you don't miss anything. Patreon also lets me offer a little discount on this. Yay, discounts! I will let you know more when this goes live.

This is obviously not something that you have to take up or are forced to use in any way. You can continue monthly as you are. It is just as an extra option.

If you want to read up on it, Patreon talk about this here: https://support.patreon.com/hc/en-gb/articles/360042152671-Annual-membership-details

2. Prices may rise if you are subscribing through an Apple device

Beginning in November 2024, any new subscriptions made through the Apple IOS app get charged an extra 30%.

If you are a current subscriber then this won't change anything for you according to Patreon, but it might if you subscribe on or after November 2024.

Patreon is asking all creators to make a choice between swallowing the cost ourselves and so earning 30% less or charging more to users on the app. In this instance, I have chosen the option that increases prices in the Apple app.

The price will only change for people using the Apple app.

I have not changed my pricing since I started this account in 2018 and I don't intend to make any changes to what I personally charge. I'm well aware that as all of my bills go up, so do all of yours. In the immortal words of High School Musical, we're all in this together!

However, I do feel that my costs are already as low as I can make them given the time and effort I put into the stories I share. If I was charging by the hour, it would already be less than minimum wage in my country. I hope you understand.

 I strongly recommend if you are on Apple and want to subscribe that you use a laptop to subscribe (so avoiding the IOS cost). 

TMT

[seeminglydark]

Idk if this means anything to you but I'm a comic artist who's had a hard time doing art for a few years. The first four was because of life hardship and lack of time/chronic pain, but now lately I've had time but a mental block. I'm creeping up on 30 and felt bad about myself for "missing out" on my opportunity to be a comic artist. It was really validating to see you post about being 41 (correct me if I'm wrong) especially since you have such wonderful comics that I've been following for a while now. It makes me feel less like I'm wasting my time putting my things in order when I "should" be drawing.

Hopefully this doesn't come across as offensive or anything. It was just comforting and validating. Anyway, big fan! Love your characters a whole lot and hope you have a good day!

Dear Anon

I am 41 years old. I have wanted to make comics my entire life. before my dad got sick, and my childhood kinda fell apart, all i did was draw. after that, i used the stories in my head to cope. life moved on. i was convinced not to accept a partial scholarship to an art school in California. life got hard. i worked at a hotel, and after i escaped an abusive relationship at 22 i hitchhiked/bused far far away to start over. i tried to make comics again, but i had to survive, and so i got another job doing the only thing i knew how to do, hotels. and i worked. and worked. and life got harder and times got heavier and i didn't get time to draw and i worked double hours, 15 to 17 hours a day. and i went four years without drawing a single thing.

i kept working myself into the ground. i was 29 now. i picked up a pen again and drew a red haired boy. he had a hard life and no love and no friends. his problems were on the outside, for everyone to see. he ran away but his problems went with him.

i was 32. surely i was too old now. my time to be an artist was gone. i had no school. no hope. i was so far behind the younger gen i saw online. i cried. all the time. i wrote stories in my email drafts while i worked shifts. i stayed up late trying to learn how to draw again. i cried some more. the boy grew. i called him Fiach. worthy. a raven. later i renamed him Avery. he was like a bird, he had wings, he was my hope. i started writing some friends for him. the people i wished i had around me.

i started finding time and space. i got a new job, something where i was lucky enough to set my own hours. for the first time i had a partner who believed in me. things were hard. but i was drawing now. and that helped.

i went on a road trip and i started drawing pages of an unnamed story on 6 by 8 paper in a sketchbook. i drew 20 of them. 'what could i call this?' i thought. Nothing Seems as Dark...no says my partner. Seemingly Dark. he made me a logo. i was 35. i bought an ipad, i cant do this on paper, its too much story i have too much to say. so i learned how to draw digitally by tracing my own trad art pages.

I spoke to my dad for the last time on June 17th, fathers day that year. he said 'you're good. i'm proud. and you're gonna do amazing things. none of this is your fault. and we will speak again soon.' i didn't know id never hear his voice again. he died a week later.

i turned 36. i kept trying. i'm old, i don't understand the internet. how can i share this?

i stumbled across Lore Olympus. i was introduced to webcomics. id read comics online before but the thought never occurred to me. i opened an account on Tapas. and then i stared at it. what if no one likes it. what if its bad. my art isn't good. i should wait til i'm better. but will i ever really be better? or will i always believe that tomorrow is better? do it now. if even one person gets something out of this story, this story about a boy who is you, a boy who looking for hope, a boy who might make it, then that is enough isn't it.

June 17th 2018 i launched Seemingly Dark.

SD's five year anniversary is in a week. 0ver 700 pages. leaps and bounds in progress with my skills. a printed comic under my belt as of monday. i was always a storyteller. but i was always an artist too.

I am 41 years old, dear anon. I did not truly embark on this journey til i was 35. life got in the way. even now, chronic illness gets in the way. but its worth it. its never ever too late. i believe in you the way my dad believed in me. i reset my life again and again. but I was always an artist. and if thats who you are, and who you want to be, even if things dont go the way you wished they could, you're an artist too.

im 41 years old. i speak about my age, even though i often feel too old to belong in spaces, cuz really, in this case age is just a number. take care of yourself. do what you need to do. and little by little, when your able, carve out your space until it becomes more of a habit. sometimes i think about all the years i lost not drawing or creating. but there's a lot of factors that make me believe had i made my story then, it wouldn't be the story it is now, i needed to live a bit. i needed to find myself. i know this was long, but i just wanted you to see i also had to put my life in order, and getting notes like this reminds me it wasnt at all a waste. im glad i could offer you some comfort. thats honestly the best compliment i could ever receive.

TL;dR I was 35 when i sat down and seriously started making comics, because life always got in the way and so did my confidence. i always feared being too old. im 41 now, still going strong.

[ghenry]

What do you think of GHMs more "Mainstream" titles such as LC, SoTD and NMH3 compared against their more underground works like Killer7, Silver Case and NMH1. I find the latter has a sense of mystique and weirdness that's missing from the former when the studio seemed pigeon-holed in a brand of "Sex, Violence and quirky"

I've been meaning to write about this here, so good question! I gave it a lot of thought after finding a JPN copy of Killer Is Dead and seeing this within the box;

Here's a quote of Suda reflecting on the production of said game;

Suda was not interested in eroticism when it came to his company's games. However, the more mainstream games GHM made (without his direction) were full of instances that were little more than eye candy. Sex appeal for the sake of it. And much of that was against Suda's will;

Paula running around in a thong (and even tits out a couple times if you played the NA version) throughout Shadows of the Damned also reminds me of Tim Rogers recalling his time working at Grasshopper as a designer in the late 2000s. He sat in a lot of meetings with Suda talking to EA and mentioned a time Suda talked about a save function idea he thought of while reflecting on Travis always using a toilet to save in the NMH games.

An early idea was Garcia going to bed with a woman every time he had to save. This was likely when the game was still going to be open world-ish and Garcia was single. From how Tim Rogers talked about this, it was pretty much the only idea Suda had that EA actually showed interest in. Obviously this idea never panned out, instead saving being delegated to a little demon that poops to signify a saved game. Funny that it connects to NMH's toilet save function in that way.

Something else worth bringing up would be the "gigolo missions" from Killer Is Dead. This also derived from a concept Suda had for Shadows of the Damned where Garcia was gonna take girls out on dates, bring flowers, and it'd actually be cute and romantic. At least, from how he described it.

(These screenshots are from Feel the Magic, a DS game where you played mini-games as you tried to win the heart of a girl throughout the story)

This idea was repurposed for Killer Is Dead, but, according to Suda, the sexual aspects of it were conjured up by Hideyuki Shin, the game's director. Therefore, it devolved into x-ray glasses, staring at boobs, and giving gifts to a robot that repeated animations. A cannibalization of the original concept.

Suda seemed afraid of Grasshopper's reputation being mutated into an identity he didn't consent to. Sex appeal is not something he really thinks about when it comes to making games. It's not his style;

The only times Suda has shown sexuality in the games he directed is when it's discomforting or deeply disturbing, almost never for eye candy.

I still appreciate games like Shadows of the Damned, Killer Is Dead, and Lollipop Chainsaw. As much as this era of GHM was railroaded to chasing some mainstream trends and trying too hard to be quirky, they still had unique aspects that help them stand out above other games of the same subgenre. But I can't help but notice a fissure between these games and the ones he actually directed. The nuance, mystery, and thought-provoking stories are most prominent when he's the one directing.

I'm not going to fault people for liking eroticism and such in video games. I've played plenty of horny games too, and there's obviously an appeal there. But anyone still expecting that from Suda is barking up the wrong tree. Looking at how he's been handling everything since 2018 makes it even sadder when you reflect how these publishers tried cramming Grasshopper Manufacture into this box they didn't want to be in.

One last thing I have to retort, though. I don't lump No More Heroes 3 with the quirky "mainstream" games the way you did in the question. Sure, NMH3 definitely went for a more mainstream marketing plan and the game got super silly at times, but it still has an interesting narrative with a ton of nuance. Way more than any GHM game between 2010-2016. Hence my 4+ hour long analysis of the game;

Many people even rejected this game outright because the eroticism and scantily-clad female cast was mostly absent. This was likely expectations they built after experiencing games like NMH2, SotD, LC, etc.

Speaking a bit more on the sense of eroticism, it's funny to think how that was admittedly present in NMH1, obnoxiously expanded upon in NMH2, and then mostly done away with in NMH3. Going as far as turning Naomi--and her balloon tits--into a goddamn tree!

However, I don't believe Suda turned Naomi into a tree for the sole purpose of removing her sex appeal. I believe this just further accentuates how that aspect is not something he's interested in or finds important for the game itself. He likely didn't even think of it that way, but instead "Hey, she should be a tree now."

And then there's Kimmy, whose death was not only a very harrowing moment in the game, it was also depicted in a sexual manner. Similar to Bad Girl's death in the original NMH. Note the motions and angles in her death scene.

Like I said, this rather disturbing sense of sexuality is more Suda's vibe. And I'm happy to see he hasn't lost that edge, so many years later. Anyway, thanks for the question! I had a lot of fun writing out this answer.

[works-of-heart]

The fandom is so lucky to have you! We appreciate having you here and all that you contribute to it ❤️❤️

1. What brought you into the fandom?

2. What character(s) do you feel the most connected to and why?

3. Out of all of SJM’s books, which one means the most to you and why?

4. Out of all of the SJM couples (fanon, canon, endgame, etc) which one means the most to you and why?

Keep doing you ❤️

Awww!! Thank you so much! This really warms my heart!

1. I got into ACOTAR in 2020, I am not sure why I delayed so long, I was eyeing the series since 2018, and decided to dive straight in. Since the first book I was hooked and immediately picked up the rest of the series! I loved it so much but there wasn't anyone else I knew to talk about it with. So I found reddit and wanted to share my feelings.

I found some parts of the fandom so polarizing, and many of my thoughts and likes were the unpopular ones, so I retreated for a while. I recently stumbled back into Tumblr when I found that there were quite a lot of people here who enjoyed the books as I did and art and fics to share. I wanted to add to that, to be in this space and contribute my own works that I've been dying to share and geek out with others.

I've met so many incredible people in this fandom, many who are super talented and skilled artists and writers, others who contribute in their own ways, and I have been glad to be here ever since!

2. Honestly? Lucien and Elain.

Lucien because he doesn't ever really fit in. He's made a home for himself in spring yes, but then thar fell apart. He lost everything and is with two others who have been his companions and made their own way. He doesn't think a whole lot of himself, he doesn't believe he's needed, as he said "a whole lot of nothing." I resonate with this so much. I've had friends whole dumped me and left me for their own group, I've known what it's like to be invited into gatherings but feel so utterly alone and unwanted, those moments really sat with me when reading his parts of the story, and so I'm excited to see him find himself and grow into truly valuing who he is, realizing he isn't just some seventh son of a lord.

With Elain, the way she's seen by her family is something infeel all too well. She's the people pleaser, the one who tries to balance out the bad with good. She's the one people think is just simple, plain, and 'pleasant'. People think she's uninteresting because she isn't causing waves, that she just enjoys her hobbies and that's it. No one thinks she's capable of more and generally deny her of trying anything else. This really spoke to me on a personal level.

I resonate a lot with Elain who tries to make the best of every situation, but also has a side of her that many have yet to see.

3. I don't think I particularly have one that means the "most" to me persay. At least not yet. I would say the CC books hold a special place in my heart. My husband bought HOEAB on audio book and during a long road trip we listened to it and he was so into it, that it made me smile. He enjoys the series and eagerly bought HOSAB audio book so we took a long drive to listen to it.

4. This will come as no surprise to anyone that it's Elucien for me! The moment Lucien lunged for Elain to try and stop her from being thrown into the cauldron, I was already shipping them, and him whispering with shock "you're my mate" I was sold!

I don't know what it is about them, but the potential they have, the slow burn, the thought of Lucien having given up on true love after Jesminda, only to be given a mate in Elain??! I want it all! I want to see Elain and Lucien having the most tsundere romance, the kind where she's denying her feelings aloud as if it would assure her that she's totally not falling in love with him. The way we can see how their powers will sync, and find home in each other. Their relationship reminds me so much of my own journey with my husband that I can't wait to see it unfold.

I could go on and on as to why I personally love these two together, but at the end of the day, they bring me so much joy and have been the inspiration to so much of my artwork. ❤️

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

I think M could’ve got an invite in 2019 but her bad behavior was already starting to leak out and her inability to dress properly also made designers not want to dress her and that she was pregnant

I wonder if she was angry that Archie was due then (apparently she was really overdue, but some say she was saying she was near the end in Dec at Christmas… some say Archie was born Feb or Mar) and took attention away from her

I just don’t understand the whole fiasco about the birth and the announcement and then the birth certificate too… and then Waaah saying she was home asap after an epidural & traumatic birth?

Yeah, there are a lot of questions about Archie's birth.

I don't know if I buy the "really overdue" story. I think she was overdue, but it wouldn't have been that overdue because it would've been considered high risk since she was having a geriatric pregnancy - which is what they call any pregnancy for any woman over 35 - and going too overdue would've been even riskier, to the point where she would have been induced.

I'll give her being a few days overdue but if her due date was March, there's no way her doctors would have let her continue to carry for over a month longer.

A theory to consider: (it's easier if I write this out in bullet points so just bear with me)

Meghan and Harry insist that they didn't announce the pregnancy early, that she was already out of her first trimester when they began telling people at Eugenie's wedding. So if she's 12 weeks at Eugenie's wedding (October 12, 2018), that puts conception at the end of July and her due date around April 15.

After the pregnancy was officially announced, Meghan was papped carrying two purple binders. In the virtue-signalling and IVF worlds, two purple items means boy-girl twins. A twin pregnancy would have been due mid-March.

Then there was the too-big-too-soon belly, further contributing to the theory that it was twins.

In January, Meghan famously made her "not too long to go" comment, suggesting that the baby was due sooner, supporting the theory of a March due date for twins.

Also, I'm not sure that the palace ever followed up the "Meghan's pregnant, baby due in Spring" announcement with a second announcement stating which month the baby was expected (as they did for each of Kate's pregnancies). So Spring, in the UK, is March through May.

Around February 20th, the infamous baby shower at the Mark Hotel (i.e., where the celebs stay to get ready for the Met Gala) instead of Diana favorite The Carlyle. This is where it starts to unravel for Meghan: if she had a March due date, then there's no way any doctor would have allowed her to fly a long-haul flight that late in her pregnancy, even if it was a private charter, and most absolutely not if it was a twin pregnancy. So clearly the baby wasn't due in March and it was no longer twins. Then, all the decor at the baby shower was in light pink, suggesting Meghan was having a little girl.

May 6th, Baby Boy Archie is born. But if it's true conception was end of July with Meghan being exactly 12 weeks at Eugenie's wedding, this would put her at 3 weeks overdue and that seems really risky for a geriatric pregnancy, especially one that's being overseen by American-based healthcare at the Portland Hospital.

So here's the theory. Given the inconsistencies in Meghan's shape and the virtue-signalling with purple binders, I think she thought she was having twins and did all her homework on twins. But then they lost one of the embryos (which is normal, it happens all the time) and Meghan never adjusted her thinking or preparations and kept trying to hint at a twin pregnancy for the attention but no one realized it because of all the inconsistencies.

Anyway, all this to say, I think Archie's due date was two weeks before May 6th (given Harry's "babies change so much in two weeks" comment), which is April 22 and they just kept it quiet until Meghan felt 'presentable' enough to appear in public postpartum or the parental paperwork (because I think the UK the parents have to either adopt their baby from or get parental orders to take the baby from the surrogate, right?) was processed.

But long story short, yeah, there's so many issues with their stories of Archie's birth and so many inconsistencies from Meghan's pregnancy that it beggars belief the version presented in Spare is what really happened. (Especially because as many of the moms pointed out around here, no doctor is letting a woman with an epidural give birth in a pool. I always found that suspicous because then wouldn't the Netflix show have photos of Meghan holding newborn Archie in water? (I didn't watch the Netflix series so I don't know.))

[asmamal-s]

LONG POST AHEDD :

Can't believe I almost forgot it was Edd Gould's birthday today lol.

Oh, it's a funny story how I first discovered his cartoon back in 2017-2018. I stumbled upon it through an animation meme made by an another artist, which raised my curiosity. I started watching the show, but back then I didn't understand English very well, so I only managed to watch 2 or 3 episodes of Legacy era and I was naive and focused more on the "fanon side" of the show where...uh y'know, tomtord crying fanart, EW angsty animations and these horribly written wattpad fanfics and etc. Fast forward to 2020 when I heard EW was coming back, I decided to dive deeper into it... and I mean by looking into the official old stuff. I found myself loving the classic episodes even more because of old style, music and flash animation quality, which brought back nostalgic memories of me watching flash animations on YouTube as a kid ( I never heard about Newgrounds I'm not sorry ) . Actually I was watching plenty of clay motion about sheeps or whatever. haha how innocent I was! That one flash video about a sheep that I watched as a kid too bad it became a lost media and i no longer can find it. Oh well, at least EW gave me a sense of closure about it haha.

Thank you Gould for creating this unforgettable show about those silly British boys (and tord for sure ) killing each other.

Decided to give some of the first drawings I made of his cartoon character and compare them over time. It's strange how much I've improved since then, and I'm really happy with the progress.

Warning: kinda cringey 

2021 no offence but ewwwwwwww  :

2022 (it was ok i guess) :

2023 (ngl he looks very weird here ) :

2024 (this year so far, my art is inconsistent, ignore it ) :

[missjackil]

We interrupt the Episode Battle to bring you the following special

The Supernatural Finale : 3 Years Later

I was introduced to these 2 boys in 2016, after much insistence from a friend of mine who had been watching it religiously since the beginning.

It wasn't my kind of show, dudes killing monsters like "A mini horror movie that's prime time safe on CW" didn't even spark my interest, but I gave in, and gave it 2 seasons to hook me, if it didn't, I was moving on.

It wasn't looking good through the 1st season. I did like Sam and Dean, and some of the episodes were good, but the monsters weren't scary, the writing was bad, I hated the lack of color, it being nearly black and white, was hard to see and just plain cheesy. I also felt like the stakes weren't high enough. I knew it was still on the air in its 11th season and Sam and Dean were both still on it, so what could really even happen to the brothers?

OH how wrong I was!

Admittedly, Season 2 was better. Still, I wasn't sure I was hooked.

And then...

This scene grabbed me by the heart and dug its claws in, and I was stuck...forever!

The next several years, I lived happily in my obsession. I gritted my teeth and cringed through some really bad writing, for those episodes and moments that made fall more deeply in love with these guys!

It was a roller coaster for sure, but it was my happy place. More than that, it felt like my best friend and was my escape when things got too bad.

Feb 1st 2018, from 8pm till 9, instead of watching the new episode "Various and Sundry Villians" I was at the hospital watching my Dad die. He died at 9:04 pm and the next several hours were spent crying with my sisters and my daughters.

We got home at 4am and I was physically and emotionally exhausted, but I had that episode waiting for me, just so I could focus on something else for an hour. I can't explain how much I needed that.

I'd say that was the worst day of my life, but they BEST day of my life was when I got to hug Jared at NJ Con 2019!

I'm sure every one of us has a Supernatural story, what it means to us, how we relate and how it impacted our lives, and I want to hear (read) them all!

Please take some time today to remember the little show that could, did, and still does! And if you still get emotional, it's okay... you're not alone

[derekscorner]

Ghost of Ramblings: Dad of Boi

Started a New game plus Recently

I have been playing God of War from Ascension in chronological order over the past few months and I've finally made my way back to GoW 2018 and it's new game plus.

It's been a hot minute since I played the NG+ and it took even more minutes to adjust to it's combat after playing Classic GoW for so long. I got hooked on Ghost of Sparda and GoW3 for quite a while.

The whole while I was just taking in how beautiful the whole game is. Remembering the story beats or how this one game got me into the whole series. My god slayer journey began here with Dad of Boi.

I was reminded of how good its story truly is. How tightly written and delivered it's dialogue is. The nuances of Kratos hit harder too since I have played classic GoW this time unlike my first time playing Dad of Boi.

Back then all I had was curious youtube and wiki searches to get a grasp of Kratos' world. It's hard to explain but it truly does feel different if you play GoW 2018 after playing, at minimum, GoW 1, 2 and 3.

Hell, I'd even argue that GoW 2018 will hit different after plaything through it's own sequel Ragnarok. I know Ragnarok has some harsh critics, I'm not one of them, but it is hard to deny that it's predecessor is just written better.

Every little story in the boat, every little dialogue when exploring, the whole adventure is a bonding and learning moment for Atreus and Kratos. Every scene with Odin's kin, the parallel to Freya and Baldur in particular, shows what Kratos is trying to avoid.

A pacing and blend so well done that I'd call it a lightning in the bottle moment.

I love this scene ^^^^

Nothing in this world is perfect mind you but it's hard to talk about GoW 2018 and not praise its story.

Of course, Ragnarok is still an improvement in gameplay overall. I had grown too addicted to the customization options for appearance. The very fact that I can unlock and play young Kratos in Ragnarok is amazing to me.

It does make me wonder what went wrong in the story department of Ragnarok though. As I said, I'm no harsh critic of Ragnarok but I can't deny it has pacing issues.

Thankfully they added scene skip so even the Atreus segments can be skimmed on repeat playthroughs. They didn't bother me on the first run but I can only handle so many two hour stretches of Atreus wandering Ironwood.

I've always heard rumors that it's because they chose to make the Norse story a duology which I could believe. Ragnarok feels like it needed to be the third game not the second one.

The whole personality shift of Freya truly does feel rushed. As beautiful as that scene is when she lets go it needed more time to be truly believable.

I also think it would've made her conflicted feelings more conceivable if she had witnessed Kratos' memories in some magical mumbo jumbo way. It's hard to imagine he's talk so freely about his family yet I also think it's crucial for Freya to shift the focus of her rage after hearing about Calliope.

Kratos did do her wrong while trying to do something right but I think that would only get through to Freya if she saw that moment. Kratos was by no means a good person but his love for his family was real and it drove him to a madness that ended a pantheon.

Kratos is easily the only man there that understands her feelings.

I glitched the blades in these scenes somehow

But even this is a minor complaint. I do not consider the narrative of Ragnarok worth some harshness I see it get. It's badly paced to be sure but it's not offensive.

If anything, I hope they learn from it for their new projects. I have next to no interest in Atreus since he genuinely is annoying in Ragnarok but I wouldn't mind giving him a shot in a spin off if they learn from it.

Or, ya know, send him to Greece. I do not care how annoying the boy of war is. I would pay them money to see him walk through Greece and see the monster that his father was.

I'd even give them my respect if Atreus realized just how hard Kratos worked to channel his bottomless rage into a weapon to use. I know many fans hate how weak Kratos seems to be now and I personally find the "holding back" excuse weak on the devs part.

So I relate a bit. I do not fully agree since I began the series with 2018 so my opinion is forever biased on such topics.

I have no real point to make with this post by the way. I am just gushing about a game I like and rambling about the contrast it has to it's own sequel or predecessors.

The whole of my praise is also limited to GoW 2018's narrative. In terms of world building or story consistency I could rip the God of War series apart.

The classic games weren't exactly consistent with some things like the potential paradox of using Fates threads, Kratos losing that time travel power in 3 despite using it moments prior in 2's ending, or the whole ambiguity of his godhood. (I wont even get into the last minute hope thing in 3)

It's not a mess like I'd rant about with Kingdom Hearts or Bleach. Sure, there are some details in a novelization or two, a comic story here or there, but it's nothing you need to know.

Kratos even references a novel detail in Ragnarok. When asked why he doesn't just throw his blades away Kratos will retort with an annoyed statement that he "tried".

Step into the light Boy

That doesn't confirm a novel as 100% valid but it does show subtly that the blades follow him against his will.

My own personal take on Kratos' continued godhood is also a curse. He's got to live as what he despises most until something powerful enough finally kills him in a way where he won't burst out of Hel's gates.

That's a tangent all its own I think. I just felt like rambling a bit, there's even a lot I left out. Like the pure pointlessness of a lock-on in either game due to how often the enemies dart around and break the targeting.

I wonder what many of you think about 2018 now that Valhalla has come and gone. Ragnarok may have been hit or miss for many but Valhalla is nearly as good as 2018 I feel.

Though, not having young Kratos speak with his original voice actor in that one scene felt like a missed opportunity imo.

Oh well, I'm done now. Bye~

[lelieblad]

the quiet pulse of shizume on ao3

okay i wasn't planning to let shizume make me melancholic again but here we are. so. let's talk about the corner of ao3 where shizume still lives. it's a small space with only 37 works. and yeah, i remember when people were more into posting their writing on tumblr instead of ao3, which, considering tumblr’s awful search function, means a lot of those works are lost to the void.

which is kind of heartbreaking, honestly.

the shizume tag on ao3 appears to be a ghost town. an archive that’s being lovingly maintained by ao3's servers but isn’t getting any new additions. it’s like visiting an old library where the books are still there, but no one’s writing new ones.

but that’s only part of the story. sure, if you look at the last five fics, they span a good six years, and quite a few authors have left their works under the lonely "orphan_account", but there’s still a pulse. you can feel it in the slow rise of hits, kudos, and the occasional comment that pops up out of nowhere.

for some context: hirunaka no ryuusei / daytime shooting star wrapped up back in 2014.

comments are pretty sparse. the fic with the most comments only has 11, and that’s counting the author’s replies. but there’s this pattern: fics from 2014 with their last comment in 2018, 2015 fics with their most recent comment from 2020. all these years later, people still find their way to shizume on ao3 and feel so moved they leave a comment.

here’s a little timeline of comments that made me ache:

2018: "hnr was such a big part of my life for a portion of time so it was really frustrating the way it ended. the idea that you read my fic in order to soothe the sadness is the greatest honor"

2020: "when i first read hnr, i rooted for mamura, but older me now realizes how their pairing, lovely as it is, doesn’t quite match the theme established in the beginning of the story. the longing and heart break of shizume was well done by the mangaka, and both characters have already moved on from this relationship, but a part of me wished to see them work out in a universe with kinder circumstances."

2020: "listen,,,,,,,,,,, i don't know what happened but on a whim i felt like thinking about hnr and it's weird how much i can pine and ache for a relationship even five years down the line. i suppose it's bc of the nostalgia. i feel it a lot in your words here. the way you describe how they remember things is the same way i feel when i read the manga so long ago. i guess it'll always be bittersweet but fics like yours make me realize that i'm not the only one feeling like that, if that makes sense? it's like soothing even if it hurts, haha. thank you so much for writing."

2022: "this is literally from 8 years ago but i stumbled upon it now"

2022: "i soooo wish you hadn't stopped updating this since 2015. i'm a shizume shipper and i was devastated that shishio-sensei didn't get back together with suzume in the manga. so, for this reason, i look to fanfiction to ease my heart and read the ending i want for the characters i love... i can only hope you somehow see my comment and that it inspires you to continue with this fic. for me, and other shizume shippers like me, stories like these that give hope are like oxygen."

2024 (responding to the comment above): "i still have a few chapters left with this, and hoping to end it with a few more. one day, i will post it. and i hope you will be there when i finally close this work."

some of these comments got a reply from the author, but a lot didn’t. maybe it’s too embarrasing to look back at something you wrote 10 years ago (why did I use those words to describe that feeling?), or maybe they’ve moved on from the characters. or maybe shizume still hits too close to home, and they’d rather not go back there.

anyway, today i got a kudo on an old fic. no one on tumblr is talking about hnr anymore, but i know for sure that shizume still haunts people. suzume and shishio are still out there, touching the hearts of old readers. the ao3 tag is all the proof you need.

[mesaprotector]

Under the cut: most overrrated and underrated anime of each year since 2017 for me (subjective!), with explanations. You can send me hate but be nice about it.

I'm only including stuff I've watched at least a cour (12 episodes) of. And also, some stuff like Dororo, even if I didn't personally enjoy it, I can see why people would, so it isn't on this list.

Starting with overrated.

2017: Dragon Maid

I guess the appeal of this is gay undertones with adult characters in an era when that was still pretty uncommon. And I do like some parts of it, including the ending. But I just cannot look past the weirdness of the Kanna/Riko ship and especially whatever is going on with Lucoa/Shouta, and the show overuses many of its worse gags. Even as someone who has developed a decent tolerance for "weird anime fanservice" this went too far for me.

2018: Violet Evergarden

This is a more mild case. It's a very pretty anime I don't dislike, but the story is kind of all over the place and the lasting acclaim it's gotten surprises me. There's just one episode that's top-tier (you know which one); besides that, the show doesn't know what direction it wants to take or what message it wants to have, and Violet herself is nowhere near entertaining enough to make it work.

2019: Shield Hero

This take is so lukewarm it's like someone forgot they put it in the microwave. But yeah—it starts off decent for exactly four episodes then does nothing whatsoever of interest for the rest of its runtime. I feel vaguely sad every time I hear about it getting a new season.

2020: Jujutsu Kaisen

It's a shounen, so I don't really expect more than well-animated fights out of it, and it has occasional good writing. The characters are not as interesting as I wish they were, something made clearer by my friend making me watch part of Naruto soon after the first season aired.

2021: Komi-san

This is not how social anxiety works. It does not just render you a mute who is somehow the most popular girl in your class regardless. I mean, sure, if you're watching this just to laugh it's kind of funny, but nobody should pretend this has any social message.

2022: Bocchi the Rock

Oh boy. I liked this, actually—it's a slightly above average CGDCT (Cute Girls Doing Cute Things) show with one-dimensional characters, a predictable plot to the extent that there is one, and only a single saving grace—highly imaginative animation for approximately 2 minutes out of every episode. I finished it, re-emerged into the world of online anime discussion, and found that people were calling this an all-time classic. I think no other show's acclaim has confused me as much as what happened with Bocchi; at one point Anilist had it at #4 all time, which is absurd even after considering the recency bias. There are similar shows that do far more interesting things with their casts— A Place Further than the Universe, The Demon Girl Next Door, K-On. I guess since I don't relate to Bocchi I just don't get it. I'll admit, at least, that she's written much more realistically than Komi is.

2023: Heavenly Delusion

This show started out extremely well, but but just like Dragon Maid above, it's a rare case where the fanservice is so jarring it seriously bothered me. The show has one episode in a completely different animation style for no real reason, just because they pulled in a guest director. The ending is miserable to watch and unlike plenty of tragic shows there doesn't seem to be a point to it, or any level of narrative coherence. I would refuse money to watch a second season of this.

2024: Apothecary Diaries

This is another mild case, similar to Violet Evergarden—it's quite good, I just don't think it's as smart as people believe it is—and Maomao's character feels a bit too pander-y even with how good Aoi Yuuki's voice acting is.

———

Now underrated.

2017: Shoukoku no Altair

I guess this entire post is "overrated: shows with great animation" vs. "underrated: shows with poor animation". But I feel a shounen with an interesting world (based on historic Turkey), actually smart writing of military tactics, and great character moments shouldn't suddenly go ignored just because it ran out of animation budget near the end.

2018: Akanesasu Shoujo

I post endlessly about this show. It's a very dumb and yet very wise show with the most emotionally beautiful final episode in the history of the medium. Cowboys. Baked fish cakes. Amazon Prime. Arranged marriage. Watch it please I'm begging you.

2019: Granbelm

As far as I can tell the only reason people dislike this 2D (!) mecha show is the cutesy designs for the mechas. It's a show that handwaves a lot of its plot elements, so it wouldn't appeal to someone who wants logical analysis of their stories, but it's emotionally smart without being cliché, and the sound design is fantastic. I scarcely notice sound design—only this and Chihayafuru do it so well to make a real difference for me.

2020: Id:Invaded

This show is reasonably well-liked and not that obscure, but it's still better than its reputation. If I had any doubts before that I Kenjirou Tsuda was actually a fantastic voice actor instead of just having a great voice, they were gone after watching this.

2021: Pretty Boy Detective Club

Slow-paced dialogue-driven shows almost always feel underappreciated by the anime community, with Monogatari the lone exception. This is by the same author as Monogatari, visually beautiful, and every bit as well-written—and yet MAL has it at a 7.08. My best guess as to why is that the primarily straight male Monogatari fandom was annoyed by the mild fanservice of the boys in this show (it's in the name, isn't it?), and nobody else bothered to watch it. It's much less ambitious than Monogatari is and much easier to get into.

2022: Requiem of the Rose King

If "an anime reimagining of Shakespeare's Richard III with dysphoria as a major theme" is a premise that appeals to you, and you can tolerate some animation budget struggles, watch this; if it doesn't, don't.

2023: Revenger

Maybe people rated this poorly because they saw "Gen Urobuchi" in the title and expected it to be as good as Psycho-Pass and Madoka (it isn't). It's still a really good series about assassins and crime syndicates in a medium-sized Japanese town, with uh—broken-down churches? Hot guys? Trade negotiations? The animation isn't even at fault here so I have no idea why it didn't take off more.

2024: Sakuna of Rice and Ruin

There are a lot of shows this year I feel were underappreciated, but this is one of the easiest to recommend—it's simple and pretty, with good character development and a really good setting, and plenty of rice farming. It is a touch kid-oriented, maybe, which shows in the lack of complexity of its character conflicts, but I don't fault that.

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Well, this is the best bit of gossip to ever appear on the Elis James and John Robins radio show:

This, of course, goes along with the story that Nish Kumar told on The Bugle of the same football game:

A game that took place when John Oliver was back in Britain briefly at the end of 2017, during which time he appeared on The Russell Howard Hour and apparently played football, but did not stop to do any Bugle episodes, which is fine, I mean it's absolutely fine, we can't all be Hollywood.

Hollywood. Despite the fact that I once made an image listing some coincidental superficial similarities,

I find it quite difficult to picture John Robins and John Oliver existing in the same place. They're wildly different. But if you asked me what I thought would happen if they ever were in the same place, I'd probably guess it would involve a lot of John Robins repeatedly calling him Hollywood.

I can't post that audio clip of Nish Kumar discussing that game on The Bugle without also posting the compilation I made of the evolution of Nish Kumar becoming the British John Oliver, because it's quite adorable:

Anyway, going back to that original clip from the radio show, I also enjoyed Producer Vin hearing comedian football mentioned and immediately asking about Andy Zaltzman. There wasn't any context from before or explanation from after that clip to explain why he'd asked, it sounds like Vin just likes Andy was impressed that they play football with him sometimes. Which is pretty cool. I think Vin's mentioned before that he's a cricket fan, and I am aware that Andy Zaltzman is weirdly, legitimately big among cricket fans, since he does so much cricket commentary and collation of stats. I'm hoping I'm right in remembering that I've heard Vin mention being into cricket, as otherwise that's just an assumption I'm making based on his race. But I think he's mentioned it.

I quite like Producer Vin at this point. Earlier in the radio show, I was a bit disappointed by how their back-and-forth with the producers seemed a lot less fun than what I'm used to, on The Bugle where Producer Chris (and Tom before him) is a beloved figure on the show. At some point I worked out that it's a bit of a different relationship, an independent podcast vs a live radio show. The radio producers are actually accountable to the station to make sure the comedians are saying things that will be good for listenership, so there were more interruptions that were genuine rebukes for going too far off on rants that would be inaccessible to a casual listener, whereas on a show that's a podcast first, you know that everyone has tuned in because they like Andy Zaltzman's inaccessible rants. I've never heard Chris Skinner try to curtail any of Andy's pun runs, for any reason besides to preserve his own psychological stability.

Having said that, after the first 100 episodes or so they settle into a rhythm, interactions with producers got a lot more natural and more fun. I'm at episode 200 now and Producer Vin has only recently started speaking up at times during the chat to hold them to account, not for boring radio standards but for contradicting stuff they've said before, which can be pretty funny at times. I like him. I think he's more naturally funny than the previous producer. Knowing he apparently approves of Andy Zaltzman, for whatever reason, makes me like him more.

Oh, and I also recently heard an episode in which Harry Potter came up, and John Robins said he's a Gryffindor, and I have not identified anyone's Hogwarts House for about fifteen years, but the years I spent doing so instantly came back to me and I looked at my phone and said "absolutely the fuck not, 100% Ravenclaw, few cases are this clear cut." And then a few weeks later they were on with Producer Vin and John referenced the recent episode in which he'd called himself a Gryffindor, and Vin immediately said that was one of the episodes when he was absent, which he knows because if he'd been there he would never have let him get away with that claim, he'd have interrupted to say no, 100% Ravenclaw. And I looked at my phone and said thank you. I like this guy.

This post has covered a fair bit of ground. The original point was supposed to be that I would pay good money to see Old John Oliver and New John Oliver tackle each other over a football. Sorry that I got onto Harry Potter. Fuck JK Rowling but I like Producer Vin.

[qqueenofhades]

As a Tumblr Elder (lol I just like saying that) who has experience with many fandoms, how do you cope when canon ends your ship, refuses to give a healthy relationship a realistic relationship outcome, makes characters act inconsistently with their established personalities without reason, etc.? Seems like a common response is for fans to lose their fucking shit. My personal response is to cry. Looking for better alternatives here lol.

Welp, do you mean such not-to-be-spoken-of events as the Timeless Abomination in winter 2018 (it's almost five years later, and no, nope, still not even close to forgiving it)? That was, hmm. That was something. For sure.

Every fan has a different relationship with canon, and how much they want the text to do explicitly/onscreen, vs. what they are content to do themselves with fanfic/headcanons/AUs. Because I am, as you say, An Old, I have gotten to the place where if canon disappoints me, I sigh, I grumble, I complain on Tumblr and to a few friends, but I pretty quickly get over it and just totally ignore it. I mean, I'm 100% expecting SAB s2 to fuck up at least one of my ships in a very stupid way (odds are on Fivan), so will I be angry? Yes. Will I make a few snarky vent posts? Undoubtedly. But after that, I will go the "I recognize that canon has made a decision, but since it's a stupid-ass decision, I've elected to ignore it" route and that will be that.

I can't tell people how to have a "right" emotional reaction to something that they're very attached to, especially when the showrunners torch it for no good reason (see again, Timeless Abomination, may it never be forgiven). I do think that spending tons of time yelling at/acting abusively to showrunners and/or other fans on social media is never productive, and shows that people need to do work on separating fiction and reality in terms of what they're allowing to have an outsized impact on their personal behavior. I hate it, you hate it, we all hate it, but still, if you find yourself acting like a total dick to some total stranger over a fictional TV show, it's probably time to take a step back and cool down.

Likewise -- crying is fine. There's nothing wrong with that and nobody's going to judge you. If you're asking how you move on constructively from that phase, again, it differs for everyone. If you want AUs or fix-it fics, that's usually readily available, since if you're mad about it, odds are a sizeable proportion of the rest of the fandom is too. As I say, canon is just one version of the story, it doesn't have to be the only one, you don't have to incorporate it if you don't want to, and you can go on creating and consuming transformative works that just flat-out ignore the parts you don't like. That's what fandom is for, and it's a good thing.

[mbrainspaz]

my gay uncle trying to explain to me that reagan wasn't that bad and his whole excuse literally being 'he had a gay friend.' 😶 I am ... how can you be this way when you actually lived through the 80's? I know media wasn't as accessible back then but damn man have you not looked back once? And then he has the nerve to frame ME as the ignorant one?

he was giving me a whole talk about how I can't just shut people out of my life for 'disagreeing with me.' (Because he wants me to unblock my transphobic mom because us not talking anymore is making everyone else soooo uncomfortable.) Ugh. 0/10 worst entire conversation I've had recently. He even tried the 'trans people don't deserve the same rights [as us gay guys] because they didn't even exist in the public discourse until recently' bullshit. When I mentioned the story of the trans research from 1930's Germany that was destroyed by the nazis he acted like I was trying to make the holocaust about trans people instead of jews. Not even??? Incredibly disingenuous. When I brought up literary sources he actually got upset and exclaimed that I should read some book about how Fauci is evil. I laughed like... 'okay.' "People only read things they agree with!" he exclaimed triumphantly as if I hadn't just agreed to read it. "Do you know how many right wing conservative christian books I've read? That's how I learned to think critically about what I read, take it apart, and refute it." That kinda took the wind out of his sails but I don't feel like I got through to him at all.

In another attempt to excuse his politics he tried the 'all politicians are evil' discourse so I talked about the minimization of harm and actual harm inflicted by candidates he probably voted for. He jumped that track so fast. Yeah I can see why he wouldn't wanna think too hard about that. He might... I dunno... have to shift his worldview to actually consider the needy and marginalized.

Over and over he kept trying to frame everything as my fault for 'playing the victim.' and 'being too polarized.' I gave the criticism earnest consideration but nah, it doesn't track. I mean I am polarized but in a standing for something so I won't fall for anything kinda way. He tried to say I was making myself the victim by letting my dad kick me out during the pandemic—said it was my fault for saying I was going to vote for Biden. Mmmkay. So I one-upped him by saying 'actually I knew moving in with my folks was my mistake from day one when my dad refused to let me pay rent. That was totally on me and all I've done is deal with the consequences ever since.' (A thing I've been saying since 2018. And it's silly anyway because my dad actually kicked me out like 4 months prior to that incident for refusing to give up any of my animals to a shelter because he believed it was their fault the AC in my apartment kept breaking [the AC broke again months after I moved out—it was a shitty AC]).

It sucks because deep down I know he still loves Reagan and stays right wing because they're the ones who made him rich. It doesn't matter that they would've rejoiced at his death back then. Even that Reagan effectively tried to kill him with gross negligence. I know that to get rich you can't afford to get hung up on the cost. I know we're each standing in vastly different moral landscapes shaped by our learning and our struggles or lack thereof. I'm pretty sure he doesn't see that. He just knows that I'm wrong so he keeps blindly tossing darts hoping he hits a target that proves he's right about me.

He kept saying something like 'I can love and respect people who disagree with me on all kinds of things. Even people who hate my lifestyle.' —as if I'm not doing exactly that by being here in his house, helping him cook pans of lasagna and potato salad for a bunch of my conservative relatives who are about to spend 24 hours belligerently misgendering me and who I know have voted for candidates up and down every ballot who're actively working to take my rights away & keep me trapped in poverty.

Look, I went in to this conversation desperately wanting any answer that would help me understand his take on this kind of thing. I wanted so badly for him to have a memory of some important historical event that I just wan't aware of yet. I also want to understand how he's been able to forgive the family who treated him so poorly when he came out. Nada. It's always just follow the money. I still hope he'll talk about his own views more (without attacking me) so that I can understand him better, because I still want to think better of him. Because I can and I do love so many people who persecute me. Anyway a little bit later he asked us not to bring up his partner's real estate buying business because the market is 'looking grim'. My hasn't-been-able-to-afford-rent-since-2017-ass was over there going, 'oh noooo that's gotta be so haaaard for him. Lemme just cry a single tear while I'm dicing this onion with one of your new $3000 knives.'

[fate-inspiration]

Back with a few questions, if that's okay ^^ "some fools think that Gilart fans like violins" do you mean that they think we don't know it's actually not a super wholesome, uwu sorta ship (lol)? Also I'm very intrigued by your concept of a GilAlter- if I were to accept one (I think it's contrary to the essence of Gil's character for a GilAlter to exist,but.), I think I'd like your version best- "he turned to his divine blood and not his human side.".

Super last thing, if you still feel like answering questions. I'm curious: would you feel comfortable sharing your shipper story? Like why drew you to GilArt, which of these 2 characters do you resonate with more, etc? And what do you think of CasGil and Lion King Arturia (personally, I love that ship -so grateful for zoro's art- and any and all combos, like Casgil x default Arturia)? Thanks!

I just realized the mistake, but it's even worse than the violins, I was talking about the rape. They think that Gilart's fans like rapes because in fsn route fate, Gil plans to rape Arturia.

(Of course, for the connoisseurs, we all know Gilgamesh's state of mind in this route).

Thanks for choosing my version of Gilalter. I had already thought about him a long time ago and I can say that he will be horrible. But I didn't really think about if he will be interested in Arturia, maybe he will.

Aaaah, I fell in love with this ship. I already knew the name of the Fate license, but I never managed to watch the 2004 (2006?) anime version because it was ugly XD (I was a teenager at that time)

So I was convinced to watch Fate/Zero very late, in 2018. And I was not disappointed, it's a good way to discover the license. I fell in love with the ship at the end of the series when Gil proposes Arturia. It came out of nowhere and Gil didn't really put his best side forward and I didn't notice the moments where he praised Saber. Since I didn't know the stories of the fsn, I guess it was like an arrow in the heart XD. I think the most important thing was the sincerity of Gil in that moment. It seemed like a whim, but when you think about it, not at all and he was making the effort to force her to accept, when in principle, if it was insignificant, he wouldn't have even asked her.

So after that, I did some research and research. I never watched fsn, because I didn't want to see a SaberxShirou and I didn't have the opportunity to play the game yet, but I watched almost everything related to the license, just to have a little official moment between Gil and Arturia. (I was unfortunately very disappointed XD Arturia became a worldwide waifu, same for Gil, because even if he's an asshole, everybody loves him. So I concluded that they couldn't put them together to mix them. Probably because it would break the fantasy, I'm not sure). Then I turned to Fanfictions, I found my little happiness, even reading the most horrible stories XD, it was not serious, I had my dose. And I started to draw humans again just to be able to draw them, and I was very happy.

For the other versions... Arturia Lancer is a problem for me because of the Fanservice. It goes from a small flat woman to a big disproportionate woman, I don't like it at all. I mean, it's impossible XD. And she is presented as someone more mature and rational than Saber when Saber is this King Arthur at the end of his life in the license. So to see Lancer made my heart ache because it's like denying her true self.

After other people will probably not agree with me XD.

I have less of a problem with Gilcaster because it's just an older version of Archer, but technically they're still the same. It's just a shame that he references Lion King more than Saber. But I like that he loves Saber Lily in Carnival XD.

I love Saber Alter. But I modified it for myself and I think others like my version.

And Lily is cute. (With Ko-Gil it's the little extra)

I don't look too much at the other versions, for example the Caster version, I haven't had the chance to know it yet. But I don't think I like her, I think she's a distorted version of Saber, but I'll wait until I get a chance to read her story to be sure.

(but I'll gladly ship Arturia saber with all the Gil XD)