#I may have problems

[billowingangel]

2000 posts!

I'm so normalcore.... This is from a few days ago...

[riajuu-die]

need an older girl to take advantage of how insanely easily i become codependent. like just compliment me and say you love me and manipulate me a little and ill be willing to do all sorts of pathetic disgusting things for your liking

[sir-qwillian-ferne]

think ing about things

[clingyduoapologist]

Scrolling through my ctommy tag like this is probably how Harley Quinn felt going through the joker’s files in Arkham

[cittythekitten]

To anyone who thinks I'm dead, well, I actually did a felony (other than killing Abyss). I murdered a bee... By stepping on it and getting stung by it in the process. Yes, I got stung by a bee. 🐝

[imagoddamnonionmason]

Deimos could throw me around like a ragdoll and I'd let him, esp if he spoke to me in that damn voice the entire time

[bosytaurus]

you know you love a fictional character when you have an aggressive, almost primal urge to put them in a little vending machine toy capsule and shake them around

just throw em in one of these babies and hear em go *ʳᵃᵗᵗˡᵉʳᵃᵗᵗˡᵉʳᵃᵗᵗˡᵉ*

[antimonys-stuff]

guy who unironically inhales vicks cough drops

[labgrownfemcel]

First and third prompts are the same for me

[krysmcscience]

Did somebody say Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear? I think somebody said Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear. Thanks to that, have these retooled The Good Place jokes:

The "powers that be" can refer to either the Theraprism staff, the Axolotl, or just. Ya know. Disney in general. Or all three! Whichever you think is funniest. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The "party" Bill's referring to is Weirdmageddon, of course. He was quite the ashhole to everyone back then.

Ford has probably gotten pretty good at the 'tune out your psychopathic ex with dank memes' challenge.

It must be very cathartic to be able to make Bill shut up whenever you want with just the press of a button. I'm sure Ford doesn't abuse this ability at all.

Oh, sure, 'Not now,' he says, before he immediately backs out of the newly-made hole in the Theraprism wall. 🙄

Don't worry, Bill doesn't get far.

also yeah i know this one doesn't have an attempted swear - i just wanted to use the joke because of the massive stink-eye involved in it because it makes me laugh

⬇️ More goofs beneath the brief ramble if you wanna skip it lmao⬇️

Why is Ford even there, you might ask? Well, he either decided he preferred to watch Bill suffer in person over being distantly and repeatedly harassed with the same evil desperation book for the rest of his life, or he got roped into some kind of contrived community service for 1.) all his many counts of interdimensional thievery, and 2.) his ignoring all the very clear warnings to NOT summon Bill in the first place (which I like to imagine is also illegal). Theraprism staff were just like, 'Wait, this guy matters to Bill? Ooh, we can USE that! It might be the only thing that can help him want to get better!' It is not considered that throwing Ford at Bill so soon after Weirdmageddon could instead make them both WORSE - in new and altogether special ways! :D

Anyway, I'm calling it the Community Service AU, and I am most likely not going to do anything else with it beyond appropriating these silly Good Place jokes. So, feel free to adopt the concept if y'all wanna??? Just make sure that Bill is still not allowed to swear, no matter what, full stop. It's gotta be a real linguistic corkblork of a situation for him, is all I'm sayin'.

Finally, have these bonus Good Place jokes, but with Handyman!Bill this time:

'Opposite tortures' doesn't sound so bad...at least until it's an all-powerful chaos entity known for torture saying it.

you may think i forgot mabel's cute pink cheeks but the truth is that i did in fact forget but then immediately stopped caring which makes it okay, SHHHHHHH

And, finally:

lmao this is shit

True facts, if you cram Season 1 Eleanor Shellstrop and Michael into a singular triangle shape, they turn into Bill Cipher. This is science, look it up. Or don't, and just trust the source that is me, bro.

Anyway, I should be in bed, y'all have fun with these, I guess. Tune in after like a week or so and maybe I'll have an addendum to my comic about how Bill was drawn naked for karaoke night. Because him actually being naked was not the only thing I considered as a plausible explanation. XD

Also if you see any inconsistencies or errors in any of these comics, No You Do Not :D

Also also, reblogs are rad as hell and I appreciate every single one, just don't repost, please and thanks. Every time a repost is made, an artist somewhere cries. :,)

[hinamie]

mentor

[thatoneluckybee]

Bee have you fallen victim to another webtoon?

The answer is almost always a yes but CAN YOU BLAME ME THIS TIME LOOK

BESTEST GIRL TO EVER BEST GIRL (there's no ranking system they're all tied for winner to me)

And a LITERAL CATBOY (on a technicality) (technicality being they are all different types of ghost and he is a cat.)

[gotham-bird]

Why does this look like my dozing off half awake dreams when I’ve had Benadryl

Doctors and Horticulturists Agree This One Sash Will Improve Your Meetings

[jesfern]

Google search how to talk to a friend who recommends you a piece of media and now you're obsessed with it and are rapidly consuming everything related to it that you can find but they still feel normally about and you are several layers deeper than them and you want to talk to them about it because you can't keep it to yourself

[unsertraumschiff]

Omg every time I go on break these last two semesters I end up so miserable about life it’s getting kind of annoying

[panda-2000-1]

the love for a constant clock tick in my ear

or the flashing and blinking of a light in my eyes

i desire them why?

they attract me to them why?

please i need explanations for my thought processes and i dont have those explanations

tell me