#I may actually conduct a formal study on this

[markscherz]

Every time I come home after dark I find newts both alive and smashed on a cycle/foot path near my home. It turns out they are coming to the path specifically to hunt for worms.

Before I moved here, I had no idea just how much of an ecological impact even a path with very low pedestrian density can have. How can foot traffic and the occasional bike kill as many as seven newts in a single day, on a 200 m stretch of path?

It’s frankly baffling and upsetting, especially because I know that every newt I move off the path will come back onto it. But, at least for now, all I can do is observe.

[reasonsforhope]

Russia’s invasion of Ukraine has galvanized Ukrainian society in many unexpected ways, but perhaps one of the most remarkable is how it has advanced the rights of LGBTQ people.

On Tuesday, in a move that would have been nearly unthinkable a year ago, a Ukrainian lawmaker introduced legislation in the country’s parliament that would give partnership rights to same-sex couples. This legislation, along with a prohibition against anti-LGBTQ hate speech abruptly adopted in December, reflects a sharp rejection of Russia’s effort to weaponize homophobia in support of its invasion.

Russian President Vladimir Putin has said repeatedly that he attacked Ukraine last year partly to protect “traditional values” against the West’s “false values” that are “contrary to human nature” — code for LGBTQ people. Perhaps he hoped this would rally conservative Ukrainians to Russia’s side — it’s a tactic Kremlin allies have tried repeatedly over the past decade. But this time, it instead appears to be convincing a growing number of Ukrainians to support equality and reject the values Putin espouses.

--

Recent History

I could not have imagined the LGBTQ movement building such momentum when I first visited Ukraine as a reporter in 2013. Ukraine was then on the verge of consummating its long-negotiated “association agreement” with the European Union, a step Russian President Vladimir Putin bitterly opposed. As the deadline to sign the agreement approached, an oligarch close to Putin funded a campaign with billboards reading, “Association with EU means same-sex marriage.” Anti-EU protesters dubbed the EU “Gayropa.”

This effort failed to dissuade Ukrainians from a European path...

But the past decade has also seen Ukrainians standing firm in their commitment to democracy, and a growing understanding that this includes protections for fundamental rights.

There was an explosion of organizing by LGBTQ people in the years that followed the Revolution of Dignity, and some slow advances were made. But it’s been the stories of queer Ukrainians fighting and dying in the war with Russia that have truly helped other Ukrainians to see them as full citizens.

Pictured: Territorial Defense member Romanova shows a unicorn insignia, a mythical creature that has become a symbol of the LGBTQ community. This patch, which depicts a "valiant" unicorn breathing fire, has become the unofficial symbol of Ukraine's LGBTQ+ military.

Today

Ukraine’s current LGBTQ rights debate is unprecedented; never before has a country under siege had such visibly out soldiers who have so few formal rights under their own country’s laws. LGBTQ rights supporters have successfully framed the question on same-sex partnership as whether Ukraine will recognize LGBTQ people as equal citizens, which has become the norm throughout much of the European Union, as well as North and South America. They are successfully flipping the proposition that, as one Ukrainian politician once infamously put it, that “a gay cannot be a patriot.” ...

“I actually think that the Russians did a good job in terms of raising awareness and changing attitudes towards the LGBT community in Ukraine,” Sovsun told me in an interview. “The more Russia insists on [homophobia] being a part of their state policy, the more rejection of this policy [there] is from inside Ukraine.”

The aspiration of many Ukrainians to join the European Union has also helped move more Ukrainians to become supportive of queer peoples’ rights, as Ukraine attempts to define itself as a European democracy in contrast to Russian autocracy. A study conducted last May by the Ukrainian LGBTQ organization “Nash Svit” and the Kyiv International Institute of Sociology found nearly 64 percent of Ukrainians said queer people should have equal rights. Even among respondents who said they had a “negative” view of LGBTQ people, nearly half said they still supported equal rights.

The current push for same-sex partnership rights began with a school teacher from Zaporizhzha named Anastasia Andriivna Sovenko. In June, Sovenko registered a petition with Ukraine’s government demanding same-sex couples be granted partnership rights. It said simply, “At this time, every day can be the last. Let people of the same sex get the opportunity to start a family and have an official document to prove it. They need the same rights as traditional couples.”

Sovenko said she was inspired to file the petition after reading a story about different-sex couples getting married before one partner went off to war. It felt unfair to her that queer people couldn’t take the same step to protect their rights. Signatures quickly poured in, stunning even Sovenko herself...

Under Ukrainian law, the president is required to formally respond to any petition that gets 25,000 signatures, and the partnership petition quickly cleared that threshold. But in a sign that the politics of the issue remains complicated, Zelenskyy ruled out full marriage rights in his response, arguing that this required a constitutional change that could not be carried out under the rules of martial law. Instead, [Zelensky] punted to the Verkhovna Rada, Ukraine’s parliament, to examine the creation of civil unions. His language implied support, but he stopped short of using presidential powers to make it a reality.

“Every citizen is an inseparable part of civil society, he is entitled to all the rights and freedoms enshrined in the Constitution of Ukraine,” Zelenskyy said in the referral."

-via Politico, 3/7/23

Notes:

While the fight is still ongoing, I can't underlie enough how massive this shift in public opinion is. Russia and Ukraine have generally been incredibly unsafe places to be LGBTQ, including in very recent history. This is huge, and it sounds like it will only get bigger.

This could also help bring about a wider sea change throughout Eastern Europe, which in general has a very pervasive culture of homophobia, often tied in with both religious conservatism and ethno-nationalistic conflict, though thankfully things have been improving significantly over the last decade.

[evidence-based-activism]

Are bi men oppressed in literally any measurable way that isn't completely misdirected homophobia or completely impersonal comments made towards gay men?

"Misdirected homophobia" ... anon what do you think homophobia is?

Let's start with definitions from the Merriam-Webster dictionary. They define homophobia as "irrational fear of, aversion to, or discrimination against homosexuality or gay people". At first glance this definition may seem to imply that this doesn't apply to bisexual individuals. A closer look shows this assumption is incorrect. Their definitions for homosexuality are "sexual or romantic attraction to others of one's same sex" and "sexual activity with another of the same sex".

Now, the connotation (implicit cultural or emotional associations that are broadly shared and generally understood) of homosexuality is that it implies exclusive same-sex attraction as contrasted by bisexuality who's literal meaning denotes non-exclusive same-sex attraction. However, this distinction is only applicable when the adjective is used to describe a person (i.e., calling a bisexual individual a homosexual individual is incorrect given the strong connotation of exclusive same sex attraction). In contrast, you can also describe a relationship or sexual act as homosexual (re: the second definition of homosexuality). As such, a relationship or sexual encounter that involves a bisexual individual can still be called a homosexual relationship or homosexual act, as long as the individuals involved are of the same sex.

Hopefully, this makes it clear how homophobia directed towards bisexual individuals is not "misdirected". They are simply targets of the same discrimination gay and lesbian individuals are targets of. I'll explicate some examples of this below.

---

To make it simple, let's consider three forms of homophobia:

Institutionalized homophobia (e.g., laws that discriminate against LGB individuals, lack of formalized protections against LGB individuals, etc.).

Cultural/social homophobia (e.g., discriminatory beliefs shared and expressed but not codified into official institutions). These may be broadly known cultural sentiments or opinions expressed by individuals.

Violent homophobia (this is actually a subset of each of the above types in that there can be (for example) state-sanctioned violence against LGB individuals, state-sanctioned protection of homophobic offenders, or individual acts of violence that are not conducted or protected by an institution).

---

Institutionalized homophobia

Any legal restrictions on homosexuality (making homosexual sex a crime, not allowing gay marriage, etc.) apply to both homosexual and bisexual individuals. They specifically restrict same-sex sexual behavior, and being bisexual is not a legal defense in criminal cases. Obviously, bisexual individuals' opposite-sex relationships/sexual behavior are not legally restricted, but that fact doesn't preclude the fact that their same-sex relationships/sexual behavior are legally restricted.

Similarly, if the law doesn't sufficiently protect against discrimination (e.g., housing, health care, etc.), then anyone who engages in same-sex sexual behavior (including bisexual individuals) can be subjected to such discrimination. For example, a landlord who rejects tenants if they are in a same-sex relationship, will do so whether the people in the relationship identify as homosexual or bisexual.

---

Cultural/social homophobia

This category covers many different forms of behavior, including (I believe) your reference to “impersonal comments”. Again, people make comments about same-sex attraction, relationships, and behaviors. These all apply to bisexual individuals, which means those "impersonal comments" also apply to bisexual individuals.

For some quantitative data, these two studies [1*, 2*] both indicate that the average attitude toward homosexual and bisexual people were similar. This suggests similar societal views towards both homosexual and bisexual people. One of the studies [2] also showed that people's individual attitudes towards homosexual and bisexual people were highly correlated. This indicates that people who are likely to discriminate against gays and lesbians (e.g., restrict rights, express homophobic views, etc.) are also likely to discriminate against bisexual people. Research on this topic is difficult to find (most opinion polling and research asks about the broader "LGBT community"), but these similar reports -- that were completed almost 15 years apart -- suggests that opinions towards gay men, lesbians, and bisexual men and women are similar.

---

Violent homophobia

There are two things to consider for this topic (1) hate crimes based on sexual orientation and (2) general violence that may or may not be hate-based.

For hate crimes, there is a sad lack of statistics for this, as most reports are grouped into LGBT statistics instead of by specific sexuality. However, this review [3**] indicates that the range of prevalence estimates for gay, lesbian, and bisexual people who face physical or sexual violence "motivated by perception of sexual orientation" overlap substantially. This suggests that the true prevalence of hate crime victimization in these sub-groups are likely to be similar/effectively equivalent.

Given the relative lack of research on sexuality-specific hate crimes, I also looked at general rates of violent victimization [4, 5]. The CDC report on intimate partner and sexual violence [4] found that the prevalence of various forms of sexual violence are similar for homosexual and bisexual men. (Their prevalence rates are also much greater -- 2-8 times higher, depending on the specific act -- than heterosexual men.) Also, for the curious: sexual violence prevalence rates for gay and bisexual men are roughly similar to heterosexual and lesbian women (bisexual female rates are even higher).

The Bureau of Justice Statistics report on violent victimization [5] shows that violent victimization rates are much higher for bisexual than homosexual people, which are in turn much higher than rates for heterosexual people. For example, out of 1000 people of each demographic:

129 bisexual people are victims of any violent crime, compared to 44 homosexual people and 19 heterosexual people

60 bisexual people are victims of any violent crime excluding simple assault, compared to 15 homosexual people and 7 heterosexual people

65 bisexual men are victims of any violent crime, compared to 38 homosexual men and 19 heterosexual men

151 bisexual women are victims of any violent crime, compared to 50 homosexual women and 19 heterosexual women

Bisexual people were also significantly less likely to report their victimization to the police (31% compared to 45% of heterosexual people).

Based on this data, bisexual men are equally or more likely to be victimized in either hate- or non-hate-based incidents than homosexual men.

---

In conclusion, yes, bisexual men are oppressed via homophobia, which is manifested in many different ways including: institutionalized restrictions on same-sex relationships/behavior, overtly homophobic attitudes, and violent victimization.

---

References under the cut:

Helms, J. L., & Waters, A. M. (2016). Attitudes toward bisexual men and women. Journal of Bisexuality, 16(4), 454–467. https://doi.org/10.1080/15299716.2016.1242104

Herek, G. M. (2002). Heterosexuals’ attitudes toward bisexual men and women in the United States. The Journal of Sex Research, 39(4), 264–274. https://doi.org/10.1080/00224490209552150

Blondeel, K., de Vasconcelos, S., García-Moreno, C., Stephenson, R., Temmerman, M., & Toskin, I. (2018). Violence motivated by perception of sexual orientation and gender identity: A systematic review. Bulletin of the World Health Organization, 96(1), 29-41L. https://doi.org/10.2471/BLT.17.197251

Chen, J., Khatiwada, S., Chen, M. S., Smith, S. G., Leemis, R. W., Friar, N., Basile, K. C., and Kresnow, M. (2023). The National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS) 2016/2017: Report on Victimization by Sexual Identity.Atlanta, GA: National Center for Injury Prevention and Control, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Jennifer L. Truman & Rachel E. Morgan. (2022). Violent victimization by sexual orientation and gender identity, 2017–2020. Bureau of Justice Statistics. https://bjs.ojp.gov/library/publications/violent-victimization-sexual-orientation-and-gender-identity-2017-2020

*Technically, both studies suggest that people express more negative opinions towards bisexual individuals. But this is a good example of how statistical significance does not always equal practical significance. Specifically, while some of the differences were statistically significant, the difference in means were no more than three percentage-points on the scale used (e.g. 3-point decrease on a 100 point scale). The one exception [in 1] was that on-average male respondents reported significantly more negative attitudes towards gay and bisexual men than towards lesbians and bisexual women (a 10% difference on their scale), which wasn’t particularly relevant to the current question.

**I wanted to address a possible point of interest for this study. A number of studies reviewed indicated a higher prevalence of physical and sexual violence "motivated by perception of sexual orientation and[/or] gender identity" for transgender people (particularly MtF individuals). However, almost all of these studies were specific to Latin American locations, and the review suggests their higher prevalence rates may be a result of their higher rate of involvement in "sex work". In addition, within the Latin American studies, the transgender sub-group sample size tended to be relatively small compared to the sub-group sample sizes for lesbian, gay, or bisexual people. Studies from other regions, with larger samples, and all the relevant high quality studies indicate the prevalence of victimization for transgender individuals is within the range of prevalence rates for LGB individuals. (Also, many of the studies on transgender individuals indicated the bias motivating the violence could be based on sexual orientation, suggesting that these prevalence rates may not apply to heterosexual (i.e., based on observed sex at birth) transgender people.)

[mariacallous]

Medicine may be about to achieve a long-sought goal: a “morning-after pill” to prevent sexually transmitted infections. It could sharply reduce soaring rates of illness and huge health care costs.

The effectiveness of this pill—and it literally is a pill, a 200-milligram tablet of the antibiotic doxycycline—has been studied for a decade, and people have taken it covertly for years. But study results published in The New England Journal of Medicine look likely to tip the pill into clinical practice. In the study, conducted in San Francisco and Seattle, participants who took a single dose within 72 hours of having sex without a condom were only a third as likely to contract chlamydia, gonorrhea, or syphilis as those who didn’t take the pills.

As with everything in medicine, there are footnotes to the findings, and risks to balance the benefits. The study was conducted only among gay and bisexual men, along with transgender women and nonbinary people assigned male at birth. Within those groups, it was limited to people who had been diagnosed with a sexually transmitted infection (STI) in the past year. The study didn’t include cisgender women; in past studies, the preventive antibiotic has not worked as well for them. And the study noted, but didn’t explore in depth, the possibility that routinely administering an antibiotic could provoke resistance either among the bacteria that cause STIs or others carried in participants’ bodies.

All that said, the results have created real excitement among physicians and people who would be eligible to take what’s being called doxyPEP (for doxycycline post-exposure prophylaxis)—even though health authorities, such as the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, haven’t yet made formal recommendations for its use. 

“I think this is a real game-changer,” says Paul Adamson, an infectious disease physician and assistant clinical professor of medicine at the University of California, Los Angeles. “We have a huge amount of bacterial STIs in the US. Gay and bisexual men who have sex with men are disproportionately burdened by them. And we have not had a lot of tools that we can use to help.”

To understand why doxyPEP could be so significant, it’s important to consider what’s been happening with STIs. Briefly: They’re skyrocketing. Since 2017, according to the CDC, the most important of these diseases have reached historic highs: Gonorrhea has increased by 28 percent, and syphilis by 74 percent. And while chlamydia diagnoses haven’t quite returned to their pre-Covid levels, the agency worries that might be due to pandemic disruptions to care, rather than to an actual decrease in transmission. All of those infections have profound long-term consequences if they are not diagnosed and treated, including making people more vulnerable to HIV infection. Collectively, they cost the US health care system more than $1 billion per year.

Meanwhile, congenital syphilis—passed from mother to infant at birth, a sign that the pregnant person never received adequate prenatal care—caused 220 stillbirths and infant deaths in 2021, the last year for which there are national figures. Gonorrhea is gaining resistance to the last antibiotics currently available to treat it.

In medicine, prevention is almost always preferable to treatment: Vaccines and other prophylactic measures are less expensive, and can be planned in advance. So it has been a research goal to find uncomplicated prevention for STIs—something that, like the morning-after pill for pregnancy, can be taken a short time after sex and doesn’t rely on the user making decisions in the moment. 

The first test of doxyPEP, a small US trial that took place in 2011 and 2012, was published in 2015, and showed that HIV-positive men who took the post-exposure dose cut their rate of STIs by three-fourths. Fairly soon after that, social networks of men who have sex with men picked up on the findings, and began sharing knowledge about using preventive doxycycline off-label. A large 2017 French study of men using pre-exposure prophylaxis for HIV, known as PrEP, included within it a study of STI rates among men taking post-exposure doxycycline; it showed that doxyPEP could cut rates of syphilis and chlamydia infection by almost 70 percent. And last summer and this spring, the two largest international HIV conferences included presentations that confirmed the doses were successful in most circumstances.

Several of those presentations were drawn from the San Francisco and Seattle study just published in NEJM. Its results were so dramatic that the authors stopped the trial earlier than planned, in May 2022: They revealed that, among 501 men who were either living with HIV or taking HIV PrEP, consuming that single dose of doxycycline within 72 hours of sex without a condom reduced the combined incidence of the three major STIs by roughly two-thirds. 

“Our goal was to understand this in a real-world setting, in a heterogeneous population of people taking HIV PrEP but also living with HIV—which biologically aren’t different populations, but may be different in terms of sexual behaviors, sexual networks,” says Anne Luetkemeyer, one of the study’s principal investigators and a professor of medicine at the University of California, San Francisco. Combined with the French research, she adds, “we now have two studies that really showed very remarkably similar efficacy in this population.”

Those two sets of results may be enough to let doxyPEP enter mainstream medicine. In some places, it already has. Last October, San Francisco’s public health department became the first local department to support doxyPEP use in its jurisdiction. And after the NEJM paper, individual physicians tweeted they would begin prescribing doxyPEP because the results looked so solid—something they can do off-label because the Food and Drug Administration already approved the drug decades ago to treat a range of infections. 

When a new way of controlling a disease seems likely to enter the US mainstream, the CDC is expected to weigh in. So far, the agency hasn’t published official guidelines regarding the use of doxyPEP. Following the release of preliminary data at conferences, the CDC published “considerations for individuals and healthcare providers,” a strategy for sharing what’s known so far, as well as an acknowledgment that doxyPEP already is being used off-label. A CDC spokesperson told WIRED by email that formal draft guidance for physicians could come “by the end of the summer.” 

When that guidance does arrive, it isn’t expected to recommend doxyPEP for everyone. “We should consider offering this to people who have an elevated risk” of STIs, Luetkemeyer says. “And that group is men who have sex with men, on PrEP, or living with HIV, who've had a history of STIs. I think that's a reasonable group.” 

And eligible people may not want to take it. Like almost all antibiotics, doxycycline has side effects: sun sensitivity, diarrhea, serious nausea. And it hasn’t worked equally well for everyone. In the trial done in French men, the antibiotic did not suppress gonorrhea infections, even though it had a dramatic effect on reducing syphilis and chlamydia. In the one trial done so far among cis women, launched in Kenya in 2021, doxycycline prophylaxis (known in this case as dPEP) had no effect on suppressing STIs.  

That was disappointing; women who are at high risk of STIs need prevention as much as men do. Equally, it was mystifying for the researchers, who now are poring through their data to see what might have made a difference: whether the 449 participants had difficulty taking the drug at the right time, for instance, or whether doxycycline behaves differently in female organs than in men’s. “We had more than 200 women show up to hear the results, and they were so shocked and disappointed,” says Jenell Stewart, the study director and a physician-scientist and assistant professor at Hennepin Healthcare in Minneapolis. “We are very focused on understanding these results before we say this doesn’t work for women.”

One thing that might have played a role in Kenya and France—and is raising red flags for doxyPEP use in the US��is antibiotic resistance. Stewart says 100 percent of the gonorrhea isolates tested so far from women who became infected while on dPEP showed high levels of resistance to tetracycline, the drug family that doxycycline belongs to; at the time of the French study, the background rate of resistance in gonorrhea there was 56 percent. In the US, where doxycycline isn’t the first-line treatment for gonorrhea, the rate of resistance is only 20 percent. That may provide a clue to why doxyPEP worked better in the US trial than in any other. But it also immediately raises the concern that if doxyPEP goes into wide use, it might make resistance worse.

The US study could not provide an answer: Though some men in the trial did contract gonorrhea while taking doxyPEP, not enough testing was done to confirm whether their strains were resistant to the medication and thus not knocked out by the single dose. Tests did suggest the drug might be affecting other bacteria in participants’ bodies, but the results were contradictory.  Those taking doxyPEP ended up harboring 40 percent less staph bacteria—something that all of us carry—than those not taking the drug; but the staph they were still carrying showed “modestly higher” resistance. Whether killing some bacteria was more beneficial than making others potentially hazardous, the trial didn’t last long enough to say.

So the calculation inherent in doxyPEP may not be risk versus benefit, as much as it is risk versus risk: preventing an infection while provoking resistance through small doses, or contracting an infection that requires larger doses over a longer period of time. “We’re not comparing doxyPEP to no antibiotics,” says Adamson, who researches drug-resistant gonorrhea and has prescribed doxyPEP for some patients. “We’re comparing doxyPEP to potentially significant amounts of ceftriaxone, or penicillin, or doxycycline perhaps, if somebody’s getting infections a lot.”

It’s a question that research will have to answer—because, no matter how the CDC weighs in, doxyPEP use is moving ahead. Joseph Osmundson, a microbiologist and author in New York City—where STI rates are rising just as they are nationally—recently sought a prescription from his regular physician. As a queer sexual-health activist, he says, it only made sense, not only to prevent infections and antibiotic side effects for himself, but also to keep from increasing infection rates in an already overburdened city.

“When people want an intervention to have a healthier sex life, you cannot not give it to them,” he says. “Withholding the intervention will not prevent people from having the kind of sex that they enjoy. The question is: Are they going to be provided with as many interventions as possible to have that type of sex with less risk of infectious disease?”

[laranjaninja]

Hi! A disclaimer: I'm not a biologist. I'm a pharmacist in a center for poison control. I have no formal education when it comes to wildlife, all the information relating to snake behavior I've learnt solely pertains to what is relevant to discuss with a doctor or nurse when a patient comes in after the biting already happened. Most of my knowledge comes from the epidemiology of snakebites, wound patterns and what the patients themselves tell me about the moment the accident happens. So, I'm bound to get things wrong, since it's outside my field of expertise. Not a good enough excuse to talk shit on the internet, I know, but still.

I tend to use "territorial" when explaining their behavior solely because when interacting with the public, most of them outside this field of study, a lot of people have this notion of snakes being "evil" or attacking for no reason. I find this word works well enough to precede a lengthier explanation: when you're in their space, they'll feel the need to defend themselves, etc etc. It may not be the most appropriate, but our biologist never corrected me, so I never felt the need to reformulate my wording. As long as the snake isn't being villified or killed needlessly, I'm good.

Also, I frequently have to compare their behavior with Micrurus sp., a fellow venomous snake in the region, whenever I have to act as a science educator. Micrurus are way tinier and more shy than Bothrops, and we find that they're way more likely to flee the scene rather than assume a striking pose - at least way more likely than Bothrops snakes. It's just to drive the point home: Bothrops are more likely to bite in self-defense than Micrurus are, and this plays a role into why >90% of snakebites are due to Bothrops (besides the whole talk about habitat, appearance, etc etc) in our region. While my explanation is not 100% correct, the people I give this talk to are either little kids, teenagers or random people that have little to no knowledge about venomous animals. As soon as they ask anything that isn't surface level, I call the biologist over to properly explain what I couldn't/correct me on what I say, so I'm pretty sure they aren't going home with a scandalously wrong idea about snakes. This is also a personal blog, not a science-related one, so I don't think very much about what I type and post if it isn't pharmacology-related.

Regarding the dry bites: Again, I'm not a biologist, all information I've gathered comes from treating patients after the bite already happened, so I wasn't there to observe what actually happened, but what I tend to see with Bothrops sp. is that dry bites don't happen often. Most of the time we have a history of a single bite being felt and only two teeth marks, with venom already taking action: Around ~80% of the time there's signs of proteolytic action, sometimes there's discreet hemorrhagic action, and even if there are no local symptoms their blood exams show something wrong. That's not something we see happening so often with Micrurus sp., so I assume this doesn't happen with every venomous snake.

So, my educated guess is that with most Bothrops sp. accidents, venom innoculation already happens on the first bite. Again, I don't have literary references to back it up, only clinical experience.

I don't have anything to say about the methodology except that the species used, Bothrops jararaca, isn't arboreal as far as I know and I've never encountered an accident with them that didn't happen on the floor, so I don't think there's an issue with placing them on the floor to test it out. Pretty cool to find out the issues with conducting an experiment this way, though!

Also, english is not my first language, so if it anything sounds confusing or weird then that's probably why.

Submitter comment: I'd like to submit this '[s]tudy of defensive behavior of a venomous snake as a new approach to understand snakebite' not for it's topic (worth studying!) but for it's insane methodology, which... well, I'll just let the researcher speak for himself:

[Q: Why did you decide to do this experiment?

A: Snake behavior has been generally neglected as a field of research, especially in Brazil. And most studies don’t examine what factors make them want to bite. If you study malaria, you can research the parasite that causes the disease—but if you don’t study the mosquito that carries it, you will never solve the problem. Up until now, the popular wisdom was that the jararaca would only attack if you touched it or stepped on it. But that was not what we found.

Q: Why did you need to be the victim?

A: The best way to do this research is to put snakes and a human together. In this case, the human was me. We put the snakes inside a ring on the floor of our lab until they got used to it, then I stepped in wearing special protective boots. I stepped close to the snake and also lightly on top of it. I didn’t put my whole weight on my foot, so I did not hurt the snakes. I tested 116 animals and stepped 30 times on every animal, totaling 40,480 steps.]

From the recent (aptly named) interview: Researcher steps on deadly vipers 40,000 times to better predict snakebites

[houseoflanguage]

An analysistic review of ‘Spirted away’: surviving in a signifiant-centric world with uncertainty(signifié) one’s inside

source : Ghibli

This July, Hayao Miyazaki's new movie, "The Boy and the Heron," was released. Reflecting on Miyazaki's previous works, audiences will agree that this new movie is highly anticipated. 'Spirited Away,' which was once referred to as 'Japanese animation for children,' has now ascended to the status of a masterpiece, containing numerous symbols and metaphors. And that's not all. Almost all of Miyazaki's works, such as 'Howl's Moving Castle,' 'Castle in the Sky,' 'Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind,' and 'Princess Mononoke,' remain etched in our memories. In celebration of his new creation, I will conduct an analysis of all of Miyazaki's past works. This article focuses on 'Spirited Away.' 

1. Spirited Away - Basic composition

Starting off with his most recognizable movie, 'Spirited Away', this is my favorite movie among Miyazaki's works, and it is one of my all-time favorite Japanese animations. I saw this movie when I was very young, probably when I was in elementary school. At that time, I was impressed by the cute characters and the warm-hearted drawing style, but I never felt anything more than that. However, coincidentally, I saw it several times again as a high school student, a college student, and after that. Each time, there were different interpretations of the work, and I thought that this movie is not simply a story of a child named ‘Sen’ who goes missing. However, after establishing my own view through the study of the human unconscious and symbols, a firm perspective on this movie was formed. Please consider this one of the many interpretations out there. 

The story can be divided into three parts: finding the theme park, working in Yubaba's onsen, and finally returning to normal life. The most important part of this work is the second part, which is about the world ruled by a witch named "Yubaba" who runs a large onsen. In this world, people instantly turn into pigs, and humans have to conceal their own scent (Haku told Chihiro that she shouldn't smell like a human being at the beginning of the movie) and forget their own names, only remembering the names given by Yubaba. What kind of world is this? Let's clearly define this world and, through this definition, discover the various settings of the work and the messages Miyazaki wanted to convey. We can see how Miyazaki describes Japanese society and what is needed there. 

2. Saussure's Linguistics - Signifiant and Signifié

First of all, before discussing this Japanese animation, I believe it is important to address the concepts of signifiant and signifié. While it may initially seem uninteresting, these concepts play a significant role in the overall storyline of this animation, necessitating a brief explanation. The signifiant and the signifié were established by Saussure, a French linguist. In simple terms, the signifiant refers to the sensory aspects of words, such as their letters or pronunciation, while the signifié pertains to the semantic meaning of words. To illustrate, let's consider the word 'sea'. The signifiant in this case would encompass the formal aspects of language, like the letters and pronunciation of the word 'sea', while the signifié would encompass the semantic aspect, meaning that when we hear the word 'sea', we all have the same understanding of what it represents.Now, you may be wondering how Saussure's linguistic concepts relate to Miyazaki's anime and Japanese society. 

3. Human beings have no choice but to communicate through signifiant.

The signifiant contains the intended meaning (signified), while the signifié refers to the actual content or meaning that is meant. Therefore, we can say that the word 'heart' has the same meaning (signifié) as '♡', but a different signifiant.

(*I am unsure if Saussure also suggested the concept of "signifying" between signifié and signifiant. However, I want to suggest that there is a signifying stage between signifié and signifiant, which is the most important aspect of communication.)

So, we can say that the meaning we want to express(signifié) is conveyed through the signifiant: '♡'. I would like to refer to this action as 'signifying', which is the moment when the signifié transforms into a signifiant. We are constantly engaged in 'signifying' in every moment of our lives, through actions such as speaking and moving. For example, honking the horn at the car in front of you while driving is a form of 'signifying' that expresses anger(signifié). Additionally, our choice of clothing can also be a result of 'signifying'. It represents the expression of certain emotions(signifié) through our attire(signifiant). Even our eye smiles, facial expressions, and gestures are outcomes of 'signifying'. Furthermore, objects like smartphones, societal laws, and group rules can also serve as signifiant, created through the process of 'signifying' the signifié(efforts, desires, etc.) of many individuals. In this way, signifiant encompasses not only simple words or symbols, but also a wide spectrum of tangible and intangible things, such as rules, laws, and mathematical and scientific functions.

(*I want to expand the concept of signifiant to include not only language, but also real artifacts, institutions, rules, and implicit social rules, etc., as they all stem from human signifié.) 

4. Humans themselves exist as signifiant to others.

Not only in terms of linguistics, but also in reality, each of us exists as signifiant to others. Since others cannot fully know or understand one’s mind, there is no way but to express ourselves through signifiant to others. For example, we often express ourselves with business cards when introducing ourselves. Business cards typically display our name, occupation, email, phone number, and so on. To others, these business cards become signifiant. Depending on the person's occupation or the company they represent, we may have positive feelings towards them or not. Consequently, we are drawn to one's signifiant (external and internal conditions but can be recognized). No matter how much we try to create good reasons for liking someone, we cannot go beyond the signifiant that we recognize (appearance, the atmosphere they emit through appearance, social status, etc.). However, there is no right or wrong in recognizing the world and people through signifiant. Because that is all we can do. 

Can a business card explain all aspects of a person? Definitely not. However, the reason we still use it is that we cannot write down all of one's contents on paper. Therefore, instead of providing an exhaustive list of all aspects of ourselves, we remove and reduce our self-information to a level that others can accept. This process is known as the 'law of the disappearance of signifié,' which means that signifiant cannot entirely contain the signifié during the process of signifying. Now, with just a bit more explanation, we can return to the topic of Miyazaki’s Japanese animation. Thank you for patiently reading through this complex discussion. 

5. Because signifiant come from signifié…….

We communicate with signifiant and believe in signifiant. If that's the case, is the most important thing in the world the signifiant itself? If we prioritize signifiant over the signifié, we should suppress our honest emotions. Instead of expressing our true feelings, we will utter meaningless words within the framework of unspoken rules and societal norms. Although signifiant should be considered as a means to convey our true feelings and intentions (the signifié), they become distorted when solely prioritized. As a result, genuine intentions will be overshadowed, and only superficial significance will be considered. Through the Japanese animation "Spirited Away," we will see how strange a world can become when the aspect of the signifié is completely suppressed by signifiant. Now, let's move on to discussing animation in more detail. 

6. A world where signifiant is prioritized all over signifié: The strange world controlled by Yubaba, and the reason why Chihiro's parents become pigs

One example of a scene where we can see the signifié being suppressed and only the signifiant being prioritized is when Chihiro's parents turn into pigs. In the beginning part of the story, Chihiro's parents transform into pigs, and later on, Yubaba explains the reason for this. Yubaba tells Chihiro that her parents turned into pigs because they ate the food prepared for the guests like pigs. While stealing food a little bit is generally illegal, there are rare cases when people receive severe punishment because of that. However, Yubaba states that the severe punishment of losing one's dignity occurs merely by violating the simple rule of 'only guests can eat the food at the shop. It is not because Yubaba particularly dislikes theft or Chihiro’s parents (there is no setting that Yubaba has trauma related to theft or particularly hates Chihiro’s parents), but rather because she reacts with extreme hostility to those who violate intangible signifiants such as laws, order, and rules. Chihiro's parents' intentions (they were hungry and, although they had money, wanted to pay later and eat the food first) were entirely ignored, and only the aspect of not eating the food as guests was considered heavily important. In this way, a society that prioritizes only the signifiant, disregarding the signifié, is a ‘signifiant-centric society’. 

Haku: "If you don't eat the food in this world, you will disappear soon."

Furthermore, this dialogue from Haku illustrates that Yubaba's world is a signifiant-centric society. After Chihiro's parents transform into pigs, she flees to the riverside where she cries in sorrow for losing her parents. It is at this moment that Haku appears and tells Chihiro, "If you don't eat food from this world, you will soon disappear." This setting signifies that only those who hold signifiant as a "consumer" can survive in this world, while those who lack signifiant, meaning those who do not exist as a signifiant(social titles like consumer or worker, etc) cannot exist in this world.

The world ruled by the witch, Yubaba, is cruel to individuals who cannot become a certain definite signifiant. Miyazaki skillfully portrays Japan's extremely signifiant-centric tendency in this film. 

7. Uncertainty and Certainty

As mentioned earlier, we humans must exist as certain beings for others. We should be trustworthy individuals to some, beautiful women, caring fathers, warm mothers, capable colleagues, and close friends to others. Becoming a certain person for others means becoming someone that others can affirm about us. We all receive affirmation from others as certain beings, and we can say it is a kind of connection between ourselves and various entities in the world. For example, let's consider a person named A, who is a school teacher. However, A wants to be very friendly with the students and uses the same casual language and demeanor as when speaking to friends. If this behavior continues, over time, the students may stop showing respect to her as a teacher, and A may also receive feedback from colleagues or superiors about her tone and manner. This could be seen as A breaking implicit social rules and failing to establish the proper identity for herself as a teacher (one's stance, intonation, and attitude are also part of one's identity). However, when she returns home, she no longer needs to be the 'teacher.' She only needs to exist as a 'mother' to her children and as a 'wife' to her husband (considering other aspects of her identity and gender roles, assuming A is a heterosexual woman with a husband). We need to become specific identities for specific entities, but this can vary depending on the context, and there is no rule that says we must be defined by a single identity. 

The reason for this is that humans have both certain and uncertain aspects. Being someone's mother does not mean you must act as a mother 24/7. Being an employee of a company does not mean you must always act as an employee. Being someone's friend does not mean you must always be their friend in every situation. If someone asks you, as a 'student,' to live every moment for 'studying' to fulfill your social role, it becomes a form of 'violence' rather than advice. We need to live as specific entities for specific purposes, but at the same time, we must also respect and protect our own uncertainties. If humans had no uncertainties, we would become mere slaves or puppets. 

8. Beings in the Onsen : Humans turned into perfect signifiant, who doesn’t have any uncertainty

In this sense, the guests who come to Yubaba's onsen are the very people who have lost all their uncertainty and have become perfect identities filled with certainty (perfect signifiant). Since this movie is from Japan, we can interpret them as representing people living in Japanese society. In the early part of the movie, we can see some interesting settings when the guests, referred to as "gods" in the story, disembark from the boat and head towards Yubaba's onsen. For example, in one scene, the guests, who are referred to as "gods," are initially shown as transparent bodies with big masks. However, as the boat's doors open, their individual forms gradually become visible as the transparency fades away. We can interpret this phenomenon as showing that only when these "gods" take on the social status of being guests at the onsen, can they exist in Yubaba's world. The director used this scene to convey the idea that Yubaba's world is a place where beings with a 100% percentage of certainty can be accepted, filled with signifiant without any uncertainty. In this world, only social roles (functions) and social statuses exist as living beings, not just for humans but even for the great forces of nature like the river (referring to Haku's transformation). Haku, before entering Yubaba's world, was just a river named "Kohaku," but after entering the witch's world, he had no choice but to find his own social role and eventually became a messenger of Yubaba by learning magic from her. This shows that in the witch's world, not only humans but even natural beings like a river must perform their social roles as a single fixed identity; otherwise, they lose their dignity and the reason for their existence. Therefore, the witch's world is not a place where humans live, but a world where only social roles (functions) and social statuses exist as the sole essence of entities. This could be linked to the reason why the director chose to depict Haku's identity as "a river," providing an even more extreme example of a signifiant-centric world in Yubaba's realm. 

9. Why is Haku a river?

The moment when Haku's identity is revealed is the climax of the entire film, making it the most crucial moment in the entire story. Although it is still a moving scene for us, some sensitive viewers may find it somewhat puzzling. Haku's identity is revealed to be the "Kohaku River," the place where Chihiro lost her shoe when she was a child. While it remains a touching moment, someone might wonder why the director did not go for a more natural setting, such as portraying Haku as another family member from Chihiro's forgotten memories or a boy she had fond memories of. The director took this risk and inserted the setting of Haku being the "river" to firmly establish his perspective on the "witch's world," even if it broke the predictability of the story, like for example, Haku is her forgotten lover or something at least not "a river."On the official Ghibli website, we can find information that aligns with this perspective, stating that Haku accepted his body being torn apart as his destiny in accordance with the worldview of "everything must follow the rules." This supports the idea that in Yubaba's world, even more so than humans, all of nature itself loses all uncertainty and turns into a perfect signifiant, driven by the extreme focus on role-centricity, which is also significant-centricity (as previously mentioned, rules are also one type of signifiant). Just as Chihiro's parents lost their dignity by breaking a very small rule, Haku faced severe punishment for breaking a rule (signifiant). 

10. The World Dominated by Yubaba: an extremely signifiant(social role, rule)-centric society, Japanese society

Therefore, all beings in the world dominated by Yubaba exist not as complete humans but only as social roles, functions, and statuses. That is why most of the existing beings in this world do not possess the full, complete appearance of a human. Humans are originally beings who embody both uncertainty and certainty, but in Yubaba's world, they became a kind of 'distorted' existence that had all uncertainty removed and must pursue only certainty. They are beings that are supposed to become complete signifiant. However, as we all know, even though their appearances differ from humans, their actions are just the same as those of humans. Therefore, the appearance of those characters can be seen as a mere metaphor. Furthermore, the more their appearances are distorted from human form, the more pronounced their distortion as signifiant becomes. 

For example, if we look at Kama(the spider-shaped old man), his appearance perfectly matches his job. Even the tiny soot sprites working with him have fully optimized their appearance to match their low social status and the job they do. Besides them, every being in Yubaba's world, except Chihiro, becomes a complete signifiant based on their assigned social functions and positions. Miyazaki expresses this by describing their appearance differently from humans. As this movie is a Japanese animation, we can interpret Yubaba's world as representing Japanese society. Actually, Japan is a society where signifiant plays a massive role in shaping social norms, cultural behaviors, and interactions. For example, we can see that many people follow their family businesses that have been inherited for hundreds of years, and they accept it without any resistance. This is one example that shows how Japanese people obey the signifiant and are controlled by it rather than following their own signifié. 

In Japan, people are controlled by explicit and implicit rules, which are significant, rather than by their intrinsic values and desires. Many aspects of Japanese society can be seen as derived from this significant-centric nature. However, I will omit detailed explanations here. These aspects originated from a collective neurosis that formed over a thousand years when the samurai and their masters ruled. During that time, everyone needed to be devoted to their assigned roles to survive, as samurai had the freedom to commit murder, torture, rape, and other acts. Therefore, people had to be solely devoted to their assigned roles to avoid disturbing the samurai's emotions, as it was the only way for them to survive. 

However, there are advantages to this signifiant-centric society, but Miyazaki seems to be more focused on its disadvantages. One advantage is that in such a society, there is some degree of trust in the products produced according to signifiant. For example, if you go to a restaurant in Japan, the chances of going to a place that serves bad food are low. In a signifiant-centric society, the level of taste in food, for example, is like a fixed rule, and people can expect a certain high quality of flavor. This extends not only to food but to all products made in the country. Japanese products, regardless of the type, are generally loved and trusted by people all over the world. It is widely known that Japanese products are generally considered to have good quality due to an implicit trust created by the signifiant-centric society. 

In addition, when following the manual properly in any task, one advantage is that you are somewhat free from responsibility. In Japanese society, which is centered around guidelines like Japan, there is a kind of ‘manualization’ even in areas where one would typically rely on individual non-verbal and social skills. Therefore, for relatively passive, introverted individuals, it can be an advantage to be free from responsibility to some extent if you just act according to the manual. However, for active and extroverted individuals, it can feel suffocating and limit their freedom. There is less room for personal discretion and explicit involvement in such a society. 

A drawback of significant-centric societies is that individuals' freedom and emotional expression are restricted. Due to the limitations imposed on the process of 'signifying'(when one's signifié becomes signifiant), personal desires and emotions become narrowed and suppressed. Expressing one's desires and emotions through 'signifying' is a fundamental desire for humans. We consciously and unconsciously create various kinds of signifiant and communicate with them. Actions, speech, thoughts, and everything are part of the 'signifiant' that comes from our minds. Therefore, the state of not expressing one's signifié to signifiant is replaced by psychological and neurological suffering for humans. Hence, in extremely significant-centric societies like Japan, many people not only lack freedom but also often find that their emotions are suppressed. This can lead to collective neuroses and, in severe cases, evolve into collective mental illness. In fact, Japan is known for having the highest number of psychiatric beds per capita. 

(https://www.researchgate.net/figure/Psychiatric-beds-per-100-000-population-The-number-of-psychiatric-beds-in-Japan-in_fig1_346056916 )

Signifiant typically represents the result of expressing(signifying) desires(signifié). However, in extreme signifiant-centric societies, only signifiant exists by itself, isolated from signifié and signifying. Signifiant that is detached from signifié and signifying is separated from the human mind(desires), and this oppresses humans at the unconscious level. In extreme signifiant-centric societies, it is often the case that signifiant(rules) have a high degree of detachment from desires and are not originated from the human mind. This also leads to the guidelines themselves harming humans, causing numerous mental disorders and injuries. If a person gets suppressed by signifiant that has no relation to their own signifié, their identity eventually collapses because the connection between their symbolic world(inner world) and the real world (outer world) is destroyed. Miyazaki made a character who became disconnected between their symbolic world and the real world in the movie: 'No Face'. No Face is actually the most severe victim of a signifiant-centric society because he doesn’t have any connection between his symbolic world and the real outer world. So his signifié remains unresolved, accumulating within him until it eventually manifests in sudden, aggressive behaviors without any easily understandable context.

People whose signifié and signifiant are disconnected are more likely to have deviant desires and have a hard time communicating with others. That is why he ate all the workers and tried to eat Sen like a monster. Moreover, when No Face returns to a normal state, he cannot speak a single word. This detailed portrayal reflects the author’s meticulousness because 'word' is one of the most fundamental tools for conveying signifié to others. 

11. “One’s Original Name” and Love

The only way to escape Yubaba's world is by remembering one's own name. As one loses their original name, the possibility of escaping Yubaba's control approaches zero. In this Japanese animation, one's original name is emphasized as a crucial clue. What meaning does a name hold for us? People have certainty, but we also have infinite uncertainty. Thus, there is no way to define each individual with a single word completely. Any attempt to define a person with a single word is an act of violence and oppression. Therefore, we each create a 'name' to encompass our own infinite uncertainty, defining our existence, albeit loosely. A name holds this significance for us.Respecting these names is a kind of affection. It is the respect and consideration of an individual's infinite uncertainty that cannot be contained by a name alone. This is a way of embracing a person's existence as an existence itself, and it might be the ideal way of communicating with the world that Miyazaki envisions. Therefore, we must remember our own names more than ever. Those who try to forget their own names or erase them and replace them with other names are not respecting others but instead deceiving and subjugating others beneath their own feet. We communicate through signifiant, but we must not think that signifiant are everything. We should not define others through guidelines they hold, and we ourselves should not be completely defined by signifiant created by others. 

If you enjoyed this article, please consider supporting me for more great articles. 

Paypal: @jtk111

[gardenshomemanagement]

Lifestyle Management & Concierge Services In Katse Dam

Therefore, I tend to aspect with those that would say it is a redefinition of present practices. We should change our strategy to discussing risk within the context of meals safety. The concepts of danger analysis are not fully or formally developed and integrated home management company boca raton into the standard HACCP literature. However, when a meals security professional identifies a hazard, that particular person conducts some kind of risk evaluation. The hazards are assessed for severity and probability of occurrence.

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Wayne Huizenga College of Business and Entrepreneurship provides business management packages in Both B,A and B.S degree which can help put together you for any enterprise profession. These packages is aimed at serving to college students build business administration and management skills including any other skills associated to enterprise. If you a pupil private home management boca raton and you might be in search of a Florida faculty that provides distance studying opportunity where you'll be able to take a business diploma program, you have many options to select from. On the opposite hand, an internet enterprise master’s diploma can last as lengthy as nine months or even four years.

For Undergraduate enterprise applications, you'll spend approximately 4 years earlier than you'll be able to complete a level program. Although, the time typically depends on this system and curriculum. Apart from that, Deciding to attend online school removes distance obstacles, you won’t need home management boca raton to worry your head over visitors, accommodation, and transportation. As a result of these potential sources of uncertainty, an efficient Hazard Analysis may be developed. The most effective meals security plan shall be specific to the ability, product and course of.

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Industry makes use of high-level regulatory strategies and regulations to develop the operational methods to control processes to attenuate the danger of producing food that will cause a meals security incident. This strategy has led many food security professionals to state that if a meals accommodates a significant hazard, the hazard must be managed before the food is consumed. Therefore, from a threat analysis perspective, an organization could not actually home property management boca raton conduct an entire danger evaluation. The severity of the hazard usually doesn't enter into the analysis at the facility level. The solely issue that enters into the evaluation is the frequency or likelihood of occurrence of the hazard. Aside from the business degree applications it presents it also presents one of the best public well being, schooling, and knowledge studies graduates in the Southeast.

[cyphershield2022]

Ethereum Smart Contract Audit Detail

Most Ethereum smart contract audit developers run their code through automated testing using Truffle. As an alternative, other programmers employ Populus, a python-based framework that enables TestRPC-based rapid testing.

Developers should keep in mind that automated code testing systems do have a few limitations before depending on them.

The two primary issues with automated code analysis are code that is incorrectly flagged as a problem when it isn't and overlooked vulnerabilities.

False positives might be annoying, but overlooked vulnerabilities pose the actual threat. Developers should always perform a comprehensive manual study of the code, even if automated code testing has previously been done.

Examples of various cyberattacks that Ethereum smart contract audits may include:

Reentrancy attack

Over and underflowss

Reordering attack

Replay attack

Short address attack

Smart Contract Performance Validation

Before releasing your smart contract, you must make sure that it is performance-optimized. Any smart contract's performance is closely correlated with the code's quality.

Performance validation should be a part of any smart contract audit for this reason. As I shall explain later, poorly optimised contracts will also cost more to execute.

As part of the validation process, the code will be examined for any mistakes that might hinder performance or in any other way impact other areas of the contract.

When doing a performance review, it is simplest to begin by undertaking a formal verification to see if the contract is executed in a fashion that satisfies all of the commitments that both parties agreed upon when entering the contract.

For instance, in the event of a supply chain-based smart contract, this agreement may be as straightforward as having one party certify the delivery of items, which would then cause the release of payment in the form of cryptocurrency such as ETH or Bitcoin, etc.

The first step is to confirm that the DeFi (decentralised finance) contract can automatically start the payment when the delivery of goods is registered.

The contract will next be examined for variables. It is crucial to test the contract to ensure that it can manage all the potential changes that can be expected of it since there might be a large range of contract "triggers" and ensuing actions.

Therefore, pressure testing the smart contract for variables that may occur from how it is implemented in the actual world is part of performance validation.

Examples of this include having a third party set up the contract, altering the terms of execution, altering the contract's completing action(s) after it is activated, and even altering how the contract responds to disputes that arise when one or both parties feel that the contract's terms have not been properly upheld.

Unbelievably, one of the most frequent issues with performance comes from developers not fully comprehending the contract's terms.

It is almost guaranteed that problems in the contract's functioning will result from a basic misunderstanding of its precise terms.

It will be less likely for contracts to behave inappropriately or to fail to deliver all the desired results if they are tested for as many of these mistakes as possible before being activated.

Smart Contract Optimization via Gas Analysis

Platforms like the Ethereum Project must charge gas in the form of ether in order to recoup the expenses of transacting smart contracts. Depending on how complicated a smart contract is designed, gas costs change.

In this illustration, they differ according on how many operation codes the Ethereum blockchain Virtual Machine needs to run. You may view a comprehensive listing of Ethereum's pricing here to get a better idea of how much it will actually cost to maintain your smart contract.

My Final Thought

Although there are several strategies for conducting a smart contract audit, the end result is usually the same. Any audit should make sure the code is free of bugs and errors.

[sohoconsultinggroup]

Why a Business Plan Is Necessary for Long-Term Success: 5 Reasons

Do You Require an Actual Business Plan?

Entrepreneurs who are launching a new venture frequently think, “Do I absolutely require a business plan? Is composing a business strategy the most efficient use of my time?” These questions are generally always answered with “Yes.” A business plan  is essential for launching a new venture.

In addition, not everyone is convinced of the utility of a business strategy. Consider the study conducted by Babson College on 116 new enterprises. The study indicated that the inclusion of a formal business strategy prior to launching a small firm did not affect the business’s final success, given the business was not seeking external investment.

Some say that the time necessary to construct a business plan might impede the launch process and cost a small business valuable chances.

In contrast, one study indicated that entrepreneurs who prepare formal business strategies are 16% more likely to attain viability than entrepreneurs who do not. Even while completing a business strategy is not a guarantee of success, other studies indicate that entrepreneurs who complete a business strategy are more likely to operate successful businesses.

Therefore, why not equip yourself with one of the most effective tools a small business owner may have?

Consider these five reasons why you should prepare a business plan before doing anything else for your small business if you are still on the fence.

1. A business plan is a requirement for most businesses.

A business plan is essential if you intend to contact a financial institution for a loan, apply for a small company grant, pitch your business idea to investors, or seek a business partner.

Potential investors and backers want to see the genuine potential of your business idea outlined in hard numbers and facts. In most cases, a business strategy is the best and only acceptable approach to deliver this information.

2. A business plan facilitates decision-making.

You cannot finish key elements of a conventional business strategy if you are on the fence, unsure, or not totally committed to a given point. Because you must write down detailed facts in black and white, business plans assist you minimise the grey area. Making difficult decisions is frequently one of the most difficult and important aspects of drafting a company strategy.

For instance, if you have not determined precisely what products you will sell at what price points, it will be quite challenging to finish the Products and Services section of your business plan. The valuable outcome of the company planning process is the identification of this and other vital information.

3. A business plan can function as a reality check.

Writing a business plan is frequently the first big challenge for a small business owner who wants to establish a new endeavour but refuses to recognise that his or her business idea may be incorrect or underdeveloped.

Identifying gaps early in the process gives business owners the opportunity to strengthen their research, test their ideas, and take steps to make the firm more robust and viable. Before the entrepreneur commits time and money in a business that is likely to fail, any additional work can increase his or her likelihood of success.

4. A business plan Can Generate Innovative Concepts

In truth, a successful business strategy is a flexible, growing, and dynamic instrument that can help you think creatively and come up with innovative answers to some of your most difficult company difficulties. This is particularly true with the Marketing Strategy Section. As you establish a strategy for your marketing operations, originality and innovation are vital.

5. A business plan generates a plan of action

Every small business owner should have a business strategy. But when you utilise your business strategy as a tool to help you identify action items, next actions, and future activities, you are building a living, breathing document that not only outlines where you are and where you want to be, but also provides the necessary instructions to get there.

You may still be able to develop a great business without a strategy, but it will be much simpler if you have a well-written business plan.

Keep in mind that if you are utilising your business plan as a legitimate business planning tool, you do not need to wait until you have all the answers before you begin. You can build a strategy outline with the facts you have available at this time, and then fill in the blanks as you learn more about the market. This type of fluid and adaptable document can be quite beneficial to a fledgling firm.

[radexchangeprogram]

This is a random one but can I request head cannons of the Brothers and Dateables reacting to an MC that’s actually a half demon but was really great at hiding her demon side since she grew up in the human world? They see a demon man just bounding towards MC before the boys could do anything MC’s like “DAD! 😃” before jumping in his arms like a child. Around her Dad she gains fangs and horns like him but she reverts back to normal when she wants to. The boys are like “Why didn’t you say anything?” And she’s like “I’m just used to my human side” or “You never asked 🤷🏾‍♀️”

Of course! I love this idea. I didn’t get a chance to proof read this so I apologize for any grammatical mistakes.

Author’s notes at the end (marked by *s)

Spoiler warning for up to chapter 17 to be safe. Especially with Belphie.

Half Demon GN!MC Headcanons

General

Everyone noticed that you never seemed too bothered by the fact that you were surrounded by demons, but figured you were just rather good at adapting.

This theory was proven wrong at a party Lord Diavolo hosted.

As you chatted with the brothers, a large demon with griffon wings, a lion’s mane, and horns similar to a gazelle began to head in the direction of your group.

The demon, who the others instantly recognized as Duke Vapula, walked up to them with a cheeky grin.

The brothers were instantly on guard, Mammon even growling slightly, as it was extremely uncommon for anyone to approach them so casually.

Diavolo, Barbatos, Simeon, Luke, and Solomon all took notice and were prepared to intervine should something happen.

You turned around to see what the issue was and let out a loud gasp.

“DAD!”

Lucifer

Absolutely dumbfounded. How did he not know about this? He read your files to the point of practically memorizing them before you came here and he swears there was nothing about you being a half demon.

He was honestly a bit embarrassed that he didn’t know about something this major.

When confronting you, all you did was say that it wasn’t that big of a deal and that you figured they already knew.

You really give him a migraine sometimes.

He feels a bit relieved that he doesn’t have to worry as much about you dying, though.

If you wish, he may start teaching you demonic etiquette, such as having you shift form at formal events.

If you prefer your human heritage, he won’t pressure you to conform to your demonic ancestory.

Mammon

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN HIS HUMAN ISN’T ENTIRELY HUMAN?!?

The loudest about his displeasure about not knowing.

“I’m your first man! I’m supposed to know everything about you!”

When you explain to him that you’re more comfortable with your human half, he calms down a little.

Tries to call you ‘stupid half-demon’ but it doesn’t feel the same as ‘stupid human’ :(

You tell him he can just keep calling you ‘stupid human’ :D

Wonders if he can get your dad to pay him for ‘providing his child with such incredible protection’.

You immediately tell him no.

Leviathan

Holy shit this sounds like something straight out of an anime!!!

Very upset that you didn’t tell him, you’re his Henry! You’re supposed to tell him these kind of things!

When you shrug and simply say that no one asked, he gets even more pouty.

You make up with him quickly by offering to play games with him all night.

Extremely curious about your demonic form for the primary purpose of cosplay. Do you know how many more characters you can be if you have a tail or wings?!?

You might inspire some fanfiction. (half demon Henry x Lord of Shadows au slow burn 100k words, def not Leviathan projecting no not at all-)

Satan

He is extremely shocked. Not only did he have no idea, but half demons are extremely rare.

From what he’s read, most half-human half-demon offspring don’t survive past birth and all documented cases that have survived reside in the Devildom so that their powers can be better managed.

He asks you about this and you reply that you’re actually quite good at controlling your powers, but that you prefer living as a normal human.

He’s not upset that you didn’t tell him, but he has a billion questions.

How long is your lifespan? Do you take more after your demonic father or your human mother in terms of power?What are your weaknesses?

He really wants to learn more about human-demon hybrids and will ask you to help in his studies.

Also a bit excited as your father is well known for some for his knowledge and writing about the sciences. He wants to discuss some of it with you, assuming you’ve read what your father has written.*

Asmodeus

Oh he is so excited.

A bit relieved that his charm isn’t wearing off, it just doesn’t work because you’re the child of a demonic duke!

You know those boiling hot springs he talks about visiting? Well he’s happy to learn that you actually can join him without fear of your skin melting off!

He’s not upset that you didn’t tell him, getting mad over stuff like that can cause wrinkles.

He will absolutely want to help you groom your horns/wings/scales/tail.

He already has shown you a lot about demonic fashion trends, such as extra clothing that can be fitted around demonic extremities, but now he actually can actually have you try on some! Do you prefer gold tail bangles or jeweled horn cuffs?

Beelzebub

Relieved that Duke Vapula wasn’t looking for a fight.

He can’t help but smile a little when you hug your dad. It makes him happy that you love your family.

When you blush and tell him that it just slipped your mind to tell everyone about your heritage, he isn’t upset.

Happy that he doesn’t have to be so scared of accidentally hurting you with how strong he is.

If you’re able to safely eat some more demonic food, he will absolutely get you to try some of his favorite foods that normal humans would die upon eating.

Overall, you’re still the MC he has grown to love and doesn’t treat you too differently.

Belphegor

Is now more awake than he has been the entire evening.

Half demon? Nah this is just some dream.

Is understanding when you explain to him that you prefer being human and living as a human.

He’s happy he found out after making amends with you. He used to despise half-demons just as much as normal humans, seeing them as repulsive.

He still very much treats you the same, but is a bit annoyed with his brothers.

With knowledge of your demonic blood coming to light, they drag you out even more often and naps with you are becoming rarer.

If you get too overwhelmed with his brothers constantly wanting to try things they thought would previously kill you, he will be more than happy to lend you some of his hiding spots. He does charge the small fee of getting to take a nap with you though.

Diavolo

Similar to Lucifer, is shocked that he didn’t know before you came to the Devildom.

You aren’t the first half-demon he’s met, but he is surprised that a demon of Duke Vapula’s rank had a child with a human.

He’s actually very excited to learn that you’re a half-demon who is in more in touch with your human side. He feels a lot more relieved that you aren’t as defenseless as previously thought.

He does, however, make absolute sure that you have full control over your demonic powers. Every other half-demon lives in the Devildom for a reason and he can’t have someone who is technically one of his subjects accidentally cause mass destruction.

He invites you for tea more frequently, asking so many questions about how being raised in the human world as a half-demon was.

He likes to exchange stories with you about your younger years and the power fluxes you both struggled with as you grew.

Tells you that should you ever wish to live in the Devildom that he would be more than happy to make the needed arrangements.

Barbatos

He knew the whole time. When Diavolo asked him to look into the success of the program, he made note of your heritage right away.

However, he decided that keeping this information hidden when he saw that you were raised human and preferred to be seen as human.

When he explains this to everyone, you can’t help but feel thankful.

While some of the others make no effort to hide how annoyed this makes them, he doesn’t mind. He knows he made the right choice keeping this from everyone and doesn’t regret it at all.

Barbatos is actually a pretty good friend of your father’s and grew up with him. He actually met you when you were a baby because of this.*

Solomon

He has seen a lot in his years in the world of magic, but nothing like this.

Usually, half-demons were very easy to spot as they struggled to control their powers, but you practically had it down to an art!

You explain to him that you’re actually pretty good at keeping your powers under control. He’s rather impressed by this and will ask to see your spell work.

Thinks it’s a little funny that he has a pact with your dad.*

Like Satan, he wants to know all about you. Unlike Satan, he is going to actually conduct experiments instead of stick to interviews.

He has a new potion that he wants you to try almost every day now.

Can half-demons make pacts? If so, you have now been added to the list of demonic beings he wants to make a pact with.

Simeon

Very surprised considering he’s blessed you before.

Blessings aren’t supposed to work on anything of demonic nature so he’s baffled.

When you explain to him that you were raised human and prefer to live as human, he smiles.

He comes to the conclusion that you being a good person must be greater than the demonic blood in your veins.

He treats you the same overall, knowing that you’re still you no matter your heritage.

Luke

Absolute denial.

There is no way someone as nice as you is part demon! He refuses to believe it!

Gets upset and accuses you of trying to manipulate him, which you quickly deny.

When you explain to him that you prefer being human, he huffs.

Simeon gives him a bit of a talking to, about how you’re still the same MC who he sees as a big sibling.

He bakes you some apology cupcakes for being rude to you.

You sometimes shift form to mess around with him, it never fails to make him let out a shocked yelp before he snaps at you for picking on him.

Everyone (except Luke) thinks it’s funny tbh.

Author’s Notes:

*Duke Vapula is described as being able to bestow knowledge about all science contained in books.

*Barbatos is also a duke in The Goetia. I thought a fun nod to this would be to have them as friends.

*The Goetia talks about the 72 demons that King Solomon evoked. Vapula is one of the demons that he evoked. The game actually references this by talking about his 72 pacts. Asmodeus and Barbatos are both included in the 72 demons which is why he has pacts with both of them in the game :)

[lelliefant]

Welcome, once again, to another of Lellie’s Wild Speculations posts!

Also again, please remember Lellie is not responsible for any potential dispute or injury that you may acquire because you based your facts on this ridiculous post. This is Wild Speculation, m’kay? And I’m an elephant. So.

Okay. I’m interested in the kinds of posts I’ve seen over the last few days about Tom Hiddleston and Zawe Ashton’s engagement. So, I have conducted a very formal, super-sciencey survey of a cross section of Tumblr posts, collecting my data between 9:15 and 9:29AM today (March 19th, 2022). My incredibly scholarly data-gathering methodology was based on a noninvasive technique of my own innovation: I woke up this morning and looked at my Tumblr feed for about 14 minutes. The study sample consisted of a robust 25-50 posts, which I scrolled through while I was waking up a bit ago. Note: No coffee was consumed during the data-gathering phase to preserve the study integrity. I kept a rigorously precise mental tally of my data, which my cat says is accurate to within plus or minus .3 percent, meeting and exceeding the conventional standards for scientific viability.

This painstaking and completely peer-reviewed research has generated the following general categories of fans’ reaction posts:

1. The “I’m so happy for them” post appears to be far and away the most common memetic, accounting for at an estimated 76% of posts.

2. The straw-man, “stop posting negativity on Zawe, you bastard-people” post is the next most common, based on this study’s findings. This category represents exactly 15% of the study sample.

This category was found to be of particular interest because the research was unable to find a single “negativity on Zawe” post to which the “stop posting negativity on Zawe” posts might have been responding.

Characteristics of this postal group included a higher likelihood than average for expressing uncalled-for, yet impotent threats of violence, a noted preoccupation with imagined slights, and measurably annoying self-righteous and ironic self-insertion.

3. A smattering of posts (roughly 5%) focused exclusively on the poster’s experience of Tom Hiddleston not falling in love with them, personally. Subcategories included the “my life is over,” and “I will never love again” commentary also prevalent in similar studies (see Jonas, N. 2014 and Timberlake, J. 2009). The research team finds these posts to be primarily tongue-in-cheek, but detects an underlying wisp of genuine ennui that makes us concerned about the sample’s chances of finding The One For Them before it’s too late. Let’s face it; the study sample isn’t getting any younger. Maybe they should try meeting someone at hatha yoga. We just want them to be happy.

4. Exactly 3% of the posts fit into the category of “why isn’t anybody talking about Tom and Zawe getting engaged?” Sub-themes included two distinct trends: “I’m superior to these celebrities because they’re not famous enough to have their engagement announced as a special report interrupting the Ukraine coverage on all news feeds” and “Omigawd, I’m so worried about Tom’s career if people aren’t talking about his engagement!”

5. Exactly 3% of the posts fit the opposite position represented in Category 4, above. Category 5 was termed the “You guys! Respect their privacy, omigaw!” category, which correlated strongly with Category 2.

6. Precisely 20% of all posts studied fit the “Duh, we been done known they’re engaged” category, which featured comments like, “He put a ring on it 6 months ago, Jared,” “CNN, I could do your job,” and “One word: Ibiza.” “Vanity Fair? More like Vanity Square!” was not amongst the comments, but that would have been funny.

The themes outlined above were nonexclusionary; some posts contained overlapping versions of these themes. One particularly drunk-sounding post featured all of the above; however, this outlier post was struck from the record because I never actually posted it.

Conclusion:

People be trippin’ and/or not trippin’ about Tom Hiddleston and Zawe Ashton getting engaged.

For Future Study:

Please don’t request to see my raw data; I don’t have time for that. Plus I forget now. What were we talking about? I’m really, really certain about the accuracy of my study though, because I just feel like it’s right. Plus, I put it on the Internet, which makes it factual.

[young-dumb-and-vaccinated]

Cult Girl: Doctorate (Hannibal x Female!Reader) pt. 2

Oils

Cult girl socializes at the opera and receives an unexpected call. 

Note: I tagged this as “anti mlm” as in multi-level marketing and not men-loving-men. 

Trigger warnings: Discussions of cults and emotional manipulation

It wasn't until after the opera was over that people began to notice you may have had a little fun during intermission. Hannibal's hair wasn't in its usual perfect side part and his jacket was slightly wrinkled in places. You could cover most of his love bites with your stole, but nothing could hide that post-orgasm glow.

Most opera-goers stayed to socialize for hours after the show concluded, making an already long night even longer. It was like clubbing, but for rich old people.

"So you're the future Mrs. Hannibal Lecter?" A woman with silvery hair said. She dragged her husband into the conversation by the arm. "I've heard so much about you."

You were about to say something witty, but noticed the way she was looking at you. Scanning you up and down. Looking for anything out of place to grill you about.

"Only good things, I hope." Hannibal said in your silence. His voice was vaguely threatening. "She is a doctoral student, in her second year of her graduate studies in clinical psychology."

The husband, who, up to this point, hadn't spoken a word, perked up. "Is that right?"

You smiled, excited for the chance to talk about your passion. "Yes sir. I've still got quite a ways to go, but I love my work."

"You should be proud." The man praised, looking at Hannibal. "You've got yourself an ambitious wife."

"Oh, we're not married yet." You corrected.

"So when can we expect an invitation?" The woman asked.

"Six months from now, isn't it?" Hannibal answered. "Memorial day weekend. Then I'm taking her to Italy for a lengthy honeymoon."

The woman threw her head back and sighed. "That sounds heavenly."

"You young modern girls are always so intuitive." The man commented. "I'll bet you tricked him into marrying you."

You wanted to call this guy out for his sexist bullshit, but he wasn't far off. It was Hannibal who tricked you, though.

Technically, he proposed to you within the first six months. You just didn't know it. It took until shockingly recently to find out.

It was during a ballroom dancing lesson of all places. You were sweaty, but loved the feeling of your lover's hands gently guiding your movements. You stepped away from the lesson to get some water, and innocently asked when he would propose to you.

"I believe I already did." He said with enough conviction to blur the lines of seriousness and sarcasm.

"You pretended to." You corrected. "Remember? We were just pretending to be engaged for Anna's wedding."

"But it didn't end after the wedding, did it?" He observed. "You kept calling me your fiancé long after that weekend passed."

You paused, then threw your head back in exasperation. "Oh my god, Hannibal."

Hannibal laughed. "I told you. Someday it won't be a lie."

"You're a piece of shit, you know that?" You pressed your fingers to your temples. "So we've been engaged this whole time?"

"What can I say?" He said, gently. "I knew you were my one and only even then. It was just a matter of circumventing your inhibitions."

"I'm not complaining." You folded your arms. "But a little notice would have been nice."

"Well, if you insist." He laced his fingers between his own. "[F/N] [L/N]. Will you be my wife?"

Even though the question was truly just a formality, you were still as giddy as a schoolgirl to hear those words.

"Yes, Hannibal Lecter." You said, cheeks stinging from smiling so hard. "I will marry you."

Then you just went back to the dance lesson like nothing happened. It was shockingly in-character for both of you.

"No." You shook your head. "We killed someone together and took a blood oath to never separate."

The couple laughed. Hannibal looked down at you with pride.

“So [F/N].” The man said. “Have you given any thought to your doctoral dissertation?” 

“Oh, Charles.” The woman rolled her eyes. “I’m sure she didn’t come here to be grilled about her studies.” 

“No, it’s okay.” You smiled. As long as you were talking about school, you weren’t being interrogated about the thirty-year age gap between you and Hannibal. “I have been thinking about my dissertation. There are plenty of fascinating topics to choose from, but I can’t not write it about, well, the reason I began to study psychology in the first place.” 

“And that is?” The man raised an eyebrow.

“Cults.” You said, grinning ear to ear. “Understanding them, their leaders, their followers, why people join them. How they evolve and grow more insidious as time passes. What form they’re starting to take in the digital age.” 

“That is interesting.” The woman’s voice rose, connoting genuine engagement. “And what form are they taking in the digital age?” 

You looked up at Hannibal, as if to ask for permission. Permission to rip into her and burn that bridge for good. He answered in the affirmative. 

“Ma’am, could I take a look at your bracelet?” You asked, already knowing exactly what she would say. 

Her face lit up. “Oh, do you like it?”

She pulled it off her wrist and handed it to you. You brought it to your nose and took a whiff, confirming your theory. Then you handed it off to Hannibal, whose sense of smell was much more refined. He took one breath, then recoiled. 

Hannibal covered his mouth and nose with his hand and coughed. “That is... quite strong, Mrs. DeMarco.” 

“It’s Affirm, by doTERRA.” She revealed, her voice growing defensive. “It helps you ground yourself and remember your worth.” 

You handed the bracelet back to her. “Do you sell doTERRA, Mrs. DeMarco?” 

“Well, now that you mention it...” A small smile appeared on her lips. “Why? Would you like to buy some?” 

“I hate to be the one to tell you this, ma’am, but...” You lied. “You’re actually in a cult.” 

She had nothing to say to that. She just stared at you with her mouth agape, urging you to explain yourself. 

“Multilevel marketing companies employ a host of cult manipulation tactics to con people out of their savings.” You explained. “Just because the promise is financial independence instead of a spot in paradise, doesn’t mean it’s not a lie. Research conducted by the Federal Trade Commission shows that the vast majority of participants actually lose money. The statistics are just a google search away, yet thousands of people still insist on the legitimacy of the companies they sell for.” 

“Well, I-” She protested, but couldn’t find the words to defend herself. “I’m there for the community, really. For the first time in years, I have a sisterhood of like-minded women who love me!” 

You smiled through a cringe. “That’s another pretty common cult manipulation tactic. They appropriate familial language to make people feel more connected to the group than they really should be.” 

Although you didn’t expect her to, she looked to be genuinely considering it. 

“Next time you see your ‘sisters’,” You began. “Pay attention to how they talk about people who are not in the group. Or, better yet, tell them that you’re considering leaving. You’ll see how conditional their love is.” 

An awkward, deafening silence followed. The woman looked at her husband, as if willing him to do something. To stand up to the evil twenty-something grad student who had the audacity to cite her sources. 

Instead, the husband just burst out in riotous laughter. 

“Miriam!” He nearly shouted, heaving like he was about to collapse. “I told you that oil business was up to no good! No honest company makes their employees pay to work!” 

The woman’s face turned red. You almost felt bad for her. The feeling vanished when the man put his hand on your shoulder. 

“Seriously, Dr. Lecter, you’d better keep this one.” He said, wiping a tear from his eye. “She’s an absolute godsend.” 

“No divine intervention was involved whatsoever, Dr. DeMarco.” Hannibal smiled to himself and brought a glass of champagne to his lips. “She is a woman of her own making."

"Oh, we all know that's not entirely true." The woman snapped, slipping into passive-aggression. She glanced at Hannibal. "How much are you spending on this mouthy little know-it-all? Isn't it about $80k a year?"

You, of course, brought this on yourself. You threw down the gauntlet by going after this girlboss's side hustle, so now nothing was off-limits.

"I wouldn't worry about that, Mrs. DeMarco." Hannibal said, calmly. "My soon-to-be wife's education is a much better investment than that overpriced napalm you wear on your wrist."

You couldn't help but laugh at that. It was a laugh you shared with the man. Hannibal looked down at you, admiring how your face lit up.

"You'll forgive my wife's rudeness." The man requested. "Please, Ms. [F/N], tell me more about your dissertation."

"Well," you laced your fingers together. "I'm planning to write my dissertation on the cult of academic elitism."

"I would tread lightly, dear." The woman warned, eyes darting to Hannibal. "You wouldn't want to bite the hand that feeds you."

You adjusted your stole, giving them a quick glance at the love bites along your neck.

"I assure you." You said. "He quite likes it when I bite."

Your clutch started to aggressively, audibly vibrate. You could have sworn you'd put your phone on silent, but it buzzed nonetheless.

"Probably just, y'know-" you stuttered, embarrassed. "An amber alert or something."

"We are expecting a snowstorm, I believe. I was warned of it a few minutes ago." Hannibal said, always ready to cover your ass whenever needed. The couple nodded along in understanding.

You pulled your phone from your clutch. Your eyes widened and your face turned sickly pale at the sight of a caller you thought you’d never hear from again. Without thinking, you slid the deny icon across the screen. 

“Right.” You said, tucking your phone and your secrets back into the clutch. “Winter Storm... Theresa is headed this way.” 

Hannibal cleared his throat. “In that case, [F/N] and I must take our leave before we get snowed in. It was very nice catching up with you. I will see to it that [F/N] and I have you for dinner very soon.” 

[pastelsandpining]

Whumptober Day 3

sticks and stones may break my bones but...

taunting | insults | “who did this to you?”

kingdom come - corrupt!zelda au part 2 | part 1 | part 3

warnings: gaslighting, manipulation, death mention, cursing, survivor’s guilt

--------------------

From what little he could remember, Princess Zelda was nothing short of lovely. She was the sort of kind that came from a genuine place, unlike the fake kind that so many had offered him because he was the one burdened with the sword. Even when she was mean to him in the beginning, he could see the good in her heart, the passion in her voice, the brilliance in her mind. She was a girl willing to do anything for her kingdom and for people who didn’t even bother believing in her. She was so painfully human beneath the crown and the gods and the sealing power that it was impossible not to like her. The only thing she wanted above all else was to save her people.

And now, a century later, she was nothing short of cruel. 

For days, Link could not go outside of the Sanctum for fear of Zelda setting the Calamity loose on him. On Hyrule. 

“You can go,” she’d told him from her seat in the throne, looking every bit the queen she was always meant to be, “but he will follow you, and wouldn’t it be a shame if the Calamity was brought about by the very hero destined to slay it?”

And when she wasn’t in the throne, gazing out at her kingdom with blank eyes, she was toying with him in whatever means she saw fit. She’d long since made him discard the Champion’s Tunic in favor of the Royal Guard’s Uniform, telling him she’d always preferred how formal he looked in it. It disgusted him after that and he fought tooth and nail to keep the last piece of his Zelda he had left, because this was not her. 

“How loyal you are to a girl you remember so little about,” she said, tangling her fingers into his hair. He’d shoved her hand away from him and replied, for the first time since his imprisonment began, “You know nothing about me.”

Zelda smiled then, gripping his chin with enough force to dig her nails into his cheeks, and answered him very simply, “Oh, Link, I know everything about you.”

The worst part was that there was no malice to her. Her skin was pale and soft and did not hurt to touch, and her eyes were green and familiar with no trace of the pink or orange Calamity Ganon made him so familiar with. She was completely, wholly herself, and not herself at all. 

She was not terrible to him, either. She took caution not to hurt him, even when her grip became too tight or her nails caught his skin. It was the things she said, the empty gaze behind her eyes, the twisted smile that made her so unlike the Zelda he hoped to find. He almost rathered she bite him with teeth instead of words, hurt him physically instead of where she knew it would hit closest to home. 

Something had made her particularly agitated today. He didn’t care to know what. As long as she stayed far from him, he could continue his brainstorming of just what he had to do to get out of here without the Calamity or Zelda following him. The Calamity did not sleep. Neither did he–not peacefully, at least. He wondered if it was the same for her, then decided he did not care. Zelda didn’t stay in the Sanctum. Hylia knew where she went, but she would always return to torment him further, looking so much like the girl he’d once worn his heart on his sleeve for. It was painful, and he would be ever frustrated by his inability to grasp the stoic mask he’d mastered all those years ago. Something would always slip. She would always get him, whether it be a flicker of his eyes, a tug of his mouth, a twitch of his hands. She did know him, far better than he wanted to admit, and he needed to get out of there before she learned how to use that against him.

“Link,” she called out, her voice soft enough to float to him in the gentle breeze. “Come here, please.”

He did not move. He turned his back to her instead, continuing his work of cleaning the Master Sword. It wasn’t dirty by any means, but it gave him something to do and he quite liked the way Calamity Ganon reeled back at the sight of it glowing in his hands. 

“Link,” she repeated. He could hear the edge of growing annoyance this time. Link spared her a glance of his eyes in acknowledgement, but nothing more. Then she was in front of him, pulling the sword forcefully from his grasp and holding it out of his reach. “It goes against conduct to be so rude to the princess. Shouldn’t you know that? You’re supposed to serve. Answer when you’re called like the loyal little dog you used to be.”

“You’re not her,” he argued simply. Her laugh was deranged, bitter, and she used the tip of the sword to lift his chin, forcing him to meet her eyes.

“You don’t even remember her,” Zelda taunted, so bitterly cruel, and it twisted his heart just as it always did. “What did she do for you, Link? Left you pictures? Thirteen measly little shots of Hyrule, and they were all about her, weren’t they? So much for the Champions.”

Link pursed his lips in stubborn silence. He would give her no response, no satisfaction, but her eyes glittered as if he already had. He hated when she talked like that, because it solidified that she was not his Zelda, and stoked the flames of the fiery fear that she was long gone before he could ever get to her.

“You’re not the girl I died for,” he spat at last, leaning away from the sword before she could use it to impale him. He wanted a rise from her, to affect her in the way she was affecting him, but as soon as the words left his lips, he wished they hadn’t. Something in her eyes darkened and she tilted her head, regarding him with a frown.

“No,” she agreed quietly. The way her lips curved up into a beautiful smile was cruel. “She died with you.”

With those simple words, she threw the sword onto the ground by his feet, discarding his heart along with it, and turned from him to walk away. The skirts of her blue dress trailed the floor behind her and the sense of anger, of guilt, that washed over him did not want to let her walk away from him. She shouldn’t be able to. She shouldn’t have the right to keep him here, to toy with him, because of an obligation he had a century ago. When he’d agreed to face the Calamity, to find her again and free her of her prison, it was not this Zelda he’d made that promise to. So he did not hold his tongue.

“Who did this to you?” he snapped, standing to follow her. She paused in her stride and he took the opportunity to grab her wrist, but she yanked it from his grasp and spun on him with a sea of anger in her eyes. “Tell me, Zelda.”

“You will know your place, soldier,” she ordered, her voice cold as her hand gripped his chin again. “You will be careful of your tone when questioning my authority.”

“Zelda,” he repeated, softer this time. “Please. You owe me this-” 

Her grip tightened, her nails digging into his cheeks, and he knew he’d greatly displeased her.

“I owe you nothing,” she said, but her grip loosened and she turned away again. 

“I came here for you,” Link replied, the growing desperation evident in his voice. “Everyone asked me to help you. You asked me to help you. And everything I’ve done– It was all for you, Zelda.”

“It seems I was wrong to call you a loyal dog.” She turned back to him, the smile on her face wicked. “Perhaps the more fitting term is bitch. I called, and you obeyed. But now, the little puppy wants to bite back.” 

She set her hands on his shoulders and shoved before he could do so much as back away. His knees hit the marble floor and he had to stick out a hand to catch himself.

“Your bite always was bigger than your bark,” she taunted, and her expression was suggestive. Whatever she was implying, he couldn’t remember it.

“You’re being cruel.”

“Do you want me to be cruel, Link?” A slender finger lifted his chin. “Because this is nothing.”

“I want to know who did this to you, because this is not the Zelda that I-“

“Remember? Pray, tell, what do you remember? I’m actually rather curious.”

“I remember a girl so bitterly human that she gave everything for her kingdom.”

“And look where that’s gotten me!” Zelda exclaimed, stepping back from him so she could turn away. Link took the opportunity to rise from his embarrassing station, his eyes ever studying the fallen princess before him. Her shoulders did not sit as high as they usually did. Something in his words had stung her. If she wasn’t so mean, maybe he would have apologized.

“Human. Tch. Is that what you see? Perhaps you fail to realize that humans are capable of terrible things. Did you know that, long before our time, the horrid Calamity you see before you was nothing more than a man?”

Link reeled back, looking at her through furrowed brows. 

“Something like that did not come from a man,” he argued–it couldn’t have–but Zelda did not look at him. In fact, she carried on as if she hadn’t heard him at all.

“A simple Gerudo chief, longing for nothing more than to help his people. A people that distrusted him. Hyrule distrusted him. Sentenced him to death because they couldn’t bear the thought of a man who wanted to use power to improve lives. No matter how genuine he was, it was never enough. The Calamity and I are quite alike in that way.”

Calamity Ganon had shuffled closer, bowing to the princess before it, and she extended a hand to run her fingers through the matted, wild mane of red hair on its head. Link wanted to pull her away, to convince her that she was not like that thing at all, but he was too rooted to his spot in surprise to make a move.

“Hyrule tried to have him killed,” she continued, her voice quiet and far away. “As it would turn out, it is not easy to kill someone who holds an ancient power of the gods. You know that already, don’t you, Hero?”

She turned her head, looking at him out of the corner of her eyes, and his breath caught. He shifted, the struggle to maintain his composure getting the best of him, and he took a step backwards. 

“When they could not kill him, Hyrule chose a different route. They took him beneath this very castle and brought forth the Sheikah to pry the energy out of his body. For lifetimes, we have been living off of a dying man’s life force. How else was the Calamity able to possess ancient technology so easily? It is no wonder that Ganondorf harbored enough hatred to transform into malice–into the beast you see now. And Hyrule would expect me to seal him away, bury our sins along with him for another ten thousand years.”

It was all too much to hear. Too much to take in. But Zelda turned to face him and was relentless in her story. She did not give him time to breathe, to process all she’d said, before she was speaking again, backing him into one of the Sanctum pillars. 

“I sat alone, for one hundred years, and the Calamity was my only company. I was surrounded by malice, by whispers of his hatred, echoing in my head until it was all I could hear and I couldn’t breathe, but it was too late for anyone to care because everyone I’d ever held dear to me was already dead by the time I thought about letting it consume me, too. And then, when I thought all hope was lost, when I spent years watching that stupid shrine on the hill, waiting and waiting for your body to show any sign of life, it started to speak to me. And it was sweet. It understood me. It understood how so many of my people doubted me, how I doubted myself. It helped me in those lonely years, Link. I was going mad.”

She brought a hand up to his face, holding his cheek so tenderly that he couldn’t help leaning into it. He could see, now, the tears glittering in her eyes, the pain in her expression. She was familiar, then–just the girl sobbing in his arms as the world burned all around them. 

“I watched you die,” she whispered out, rubbing her thumb over his skin. “How am I supposed to be alright after that?”

Her words wrenched his heart from his chest. How guilty he felt then, for failing her. For selfishly letting her hold him in those final moments. For making her watch as the breath left his body. He would never quite be able to forget the way she looked down at him in such horror. 

“I’m sorry,” he replied, quiet as the wind. For failing. For making her wait so long that she’d been driven mad. Her smile was soft, weak, but genuine. He wondered vaguely if, when he held her in those woods in the midst of the Calamity, he’d wanted to kiss her then, too.

“Do you know who decides right from wrong?” she asked softly. Link shook his head. “The side you’re on. My side has changed, because I’ve decided that I don’t want the help of gods who turned their back on me as I groveled at their feet for the salvation of my kingdom.”

“So you side with the being that brought it to its knees?” he argued, pulling his face away from her touch at last. He felt so empty without it.

“What choice did I have?” Zelda fired back, her voice raising as she crumbled into hysterics. “The Calamity brought down the strongest people I knew. I’m hardly a quarter of what you all were. I did what I could, I sealed it, and then I realized that it was right. Hyrule should be destroyed! And if you think you’re here to slay it, then I suppose you’d better shove your sacred sword through me, first.”

Link stepped backwards, hitting the pillar again, and he felt like crying. 

“I can’t seal the Calamity without you, Zelda,” he tried, reaching a hand for her. She swatted it away, fixing her once vulnerable gaze into an icy glare.

“Then you’re not sealing a thing. You asked who did this to me, but you fail to see the obvious. I did this to myself, Link. You have no idea what it was like.”

She turned away again, filling him with an overwhelming sense of panic. No, he couldn’t let her walk away. This conversation couldn’t be over. There had to be something he could do, something he could say, that would bring her back, keep her from the hands of the Calamity.

“Why do you keep me here?” he asked, stepping after her. “Why do you—“

“I should think that would be obvious,” Zelda replied, pausing to glance back at him. “I loved you, you know, and you’re here on your own accord. You could leave rather easily if you pleased, but you stay. Why? Is it out of fear that Ganon would follow you? No, I don’t think it is.”

Link frowned, feeling sick. He wanted more than anything to ask what she meant by that, to press her further, but she kept walking and only said,

“You should pick up your sword. Wouldn’t want to offend the Goddess.”

--------------------

masterlist | whumptober by day | whumptober by collection | original post

[antoine-roquentin]

The court set standards on when and how jurors can be subjected to background checks by prosecutors and established a process for challenging those investigations if discrimination is suspected. The justices also called for a judicial conference on jury selection -- which means the ruling could eventually result in even more much-needed reform to that process.

It’s a rare and commendable decision to re-examine the longstanding, difficult questions about how to eliminate discrimination in jury selection.

Katherine Carter, public information officer for the Essex County Prosecutor's Office, which handled Andujar's case, told me they're still reviewing the ruling.

"We believe the assistant prosecutor who tried the case acted in good faith based on the caselaw at the time" and "we do not believe that the prosecutor acted with any racial bias," Carter said. "We respect the ruling of the court and will apply it during retrial and any other cases going forward."

The undisputed facts about the proceedings make a pretty compelling case, on their own, that at least some implicit bias was at play.

One of the prospective jurors at Andujar’s trial was F.G., a Black man from Newark who worked for the East Orange Department of Public Works.

F.G. mentioned two family members who were cops. He’d grown up in a neighborhood with a lot of crime, and some of his friends had sold drugs. Crime victims also were part of his circles, including two cousins that were murdered, and a friend who was robbed at gunpoint.

“I think it just come[s] with the territory,” F.G. said.

F.G. stressed that he stayed away from criminal activity, the court said. He stated that he believed the judicial system was generally effective.

Prosecutors challenged F.G. for cause – meaning they argued he couldn’t be impartial or wouldn’t follow court instructions. They said his friends and background “draw into question whether he respects the criminal justice system,” according to the opinion.

Defense attorneys responded that F.G.’s story was typical for certain neighborhoods. The state’s position was “untenable” because it excludes too many people from places like Newark from serving on juries, Andujar’s counsel said.

The lower court rejected the prosecutors argument, saying there was no basis to dismiss F.G. for cause.

That's when the prosecution took a turn.

County attorneys ran a criminal history check on F.G., and  found an open municipal court warrant for simple assault (which includes attempting to physically harm another person, and physically threatening someone).

Prosecutors then contacted the city fugitive squad to have F.G. arrested before the next day of jury selection. When that didn’t pan out, they told the judge they were going to lock F.G. up during the next court date, and they renewed their for-cause challenge. The court ultimately arranged to excuse F.G. and have him arrested outside the other jurors' view.

After all that, the charges against F.G. were dropped two months later. It also bears noting that an outstanding warrant doesn’t actually bar someone from jury service in New Jersey.

On appeal, the Supreme Court noted that the “practice of running background checks on prospective jurors raises a question of first impression.”

Prosecutor's said it’s “extremely rare” for them to investigate jurors’ criminal records. But there are indications that the practice is more common than one might imagine.

I asked attorney Dennis Drasco, a member of Lum, Drasco & Positan in New Jersey, about the prevalence of the practice. Drasco has served on multiple panels and commissions to study and improve jury selection for over a decade, both with the state judiciary and with the American Bar Association.

"The problem is that a lot people don't even realize the effect of certain practices," Drasco said. The court's ruling as to implicit bias "is a wake up call" that the problematic practice exists, he said.

The Supreme Court in Andujar’s case said it couldn't question “the State’s good-faith belief that it had the authority to run the background check.” Even defense counsel didn’t formally object when the government moved to arrest F.G. -- a prospective juror who wouldn't have been arrested otherwise -- as an apparent means of excluding him from the pool. (Defense attorneys did put concerns on the record that prosecutors singled out a juror for a background check, and that the move implicated constitutional due process concerns.)

The deference to the prosecutors' move by the court and opposing counsel suggests the practice isn't entirely uncommon, and the high court’s review of case law also shows the practice is at least generally accepted.

Iowa allows prosecutors to conduct background checks on jurors for good cause, and with a court order. At least six  states allow it if prosecutors also disclose the information to defense attorneys. Just as many states, at least seven, “impose no such limits on the prosecution,” the court said.

New Jersey’s new rules require court permission before checking a juror's criminal history – and a “reasonable, individualized, good-faith” reason to believe it might reveal pertinent information that may not be uncovered by jury questionnaires or voir dire. Certain explanations will be considered presumptively invalid, the court said, including checking jurors' backgrounds simply because they express a distrust of law enforcement or lived in a high-crime neighborhood. And, if prosecutors move to strike a juror based on the results, the defense can still challenge that strike as discriminatory.

It’s a solid start, and the court clearly believes there’s more work to be done.

to summarize, a black guy showed up for jury duty and said yeah, he knew people who sold drugs cause he lived in a poor neighbourhood. prosecutors tried to strike him but defense noted that if we struck everybody who knew drug dealers from juries, we’d be ending up with racially biased juries. prosecution then ran a background check and came up with something minor to arrest him with when he showed up for jury duty. the new jersey supreme court ended up calling out the prosecutor’s conduct, although only verbally, but more importantly used it as grounds to give the defendant in that case a new trial.

[tartagilicious]

[CN] Lucien’s Birthday Date 2020 (eng translation)

💌 this is coupled with a rumours and secrets that I’ll publish in the next day or so! they’re connected, but context is not extremely necessary to understand the date.

— 

Today is Lucien’s birthday. But what’s different from the days in the past is that today is a more special day. In the morning, he’ll report on the topics that he has studied for many years. On the projection screen, a series of large characters detailing, “Monthly Injured Patient’s Cognitive Change of Different Emotions and Intervention Measures for Emotion Recognition After Injury.” are displayed.

I sat quietly in the back of the lecture hall, watching Lucien walk into the lecture hall. After getting to know Lucien, I know that he’s always been studying many things himself. Although I don’t quite understand his subject, through the whispers of the audience, I know that this is one of the major issues that have been valued by the brain science community, and has yet to be resolved.

Lucien stood in a formal suit on the stage, and looked down around the seating area. He stopped for a few moments while looking in the direction I was, then walked to the podium.

Lucien: About twenty years ago, Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI), the cognition of a traumatic lunatic injury, was a topic that was of not much concern to anyone. Usually people think that this is a treatment experience, or the baggage is caused by the patient’s own psychological changes.

Lucien: In a 2012 study, it is estimated that 54-60 million people worldwide suffer from TBI each year. 2.2-3.6 million people suffer from moderate to severe damage each year. In recent years, with the advancement of science and technology, we have been able to monitor the changes in various physical data of patients with brain injury by using high-end equipment.

Lucien: We found that emotional changes are cognitions in traditional psychology. It may be caused by physiological changes in the patient’s brain itself. Therefore, along this line of thinking, I conducted an in-depth research plan on the mechanism of emotional cognitive changes in TBI patients to determine the principle of change.

Lucien: Based on the guidance of the research results, intervention measures for post-injury emotion recognition for TBI patients was also formulated.

Lucien dropped each word calmly and carefully with his speech. The report on the screen is displayed neatly page by page. Most of the people below the venue’s stage were quiet, and except for the sound of rustling pages.

Lucien: People with TBI may also experience their anxiety increasing after living with TBI. After TBI, anxiety may aggravate other cognitive dysfunctions. For example, the ability to recognise emotions. Compared with positive emotions, it is more difficult for people with TBI to recognise negative emotions such as anger, fear, and sadness.

Lucien: Next, I will introduce the data based on a group of 25 participants.

In the lecture hall, scholars and researchers from all over the world are witnessing this together. How many years of research did it take to get to this moment?

I was in the last row of the lecture hall, so i secretly photographed Lucien and inserted it into our commemorative album,

It was noon when Lucien left the research venue. I left the building early and waited at the door, carrying a box of cake and a bouquet of flowers. When seeing him, I solemnly handed over the bouquet.

MC: Professor Xu, that’s hard work.

Lucien glanced at the cake box in my hand. His eyes fell on my calm face and his eyes squinted thoughtfully before taking the bouquet.

Lucien: Are you planning to “surprise” me with this year’s gift?

MC: This bouquet of flowers is for Professor Xu’s hard work, not a birthday gift.

I smiled and raised the box of cake in my hand, and sincerely looked directly at Lucien.

MC: But sometimes, the surprise isn’t so foreseeable, and is more unexpected and magical. Anyways, every time I make a small move, you’ll guess at the end. So, it’s better to go the other way to be more generous. I hope this year’s birthday, everything will start with you.

Lucien: So… I can do anything today?

The voice is a little low in the autumn breeze, like a fallen leaf kissing the water’s surface. Meeting his gaze, I nodded happily.

MC: Today is the third birthday I’ll be able to celebrate with you, and is the day when your years of research has temporarily come to an end. On such a special day, your mood is the most important!

MC: I want to accompany you to do all of the things you want to do, instead of letting you meet my expectations. In order to deal with various different situations, I made sure to make a special heat preservation and storage for the cake.

Lucien: If i want to do many things, will it be a big trouble?

MC: It’s your birthday today, it’s principle to accept the wants of others freely.

Lucien: So what if there are a lot of things and we can’t finish them today?

MC: Then we’ll do them tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, the day after that tomorrow, and continue until we finish. Anyway, I have a lot of time. So you don’t have to think too much, you can just do whatever you want.

Lucien slowly blinked after hearing my answer. He lowered my eyes, not knowing what he was thinking.

A few days before the report, Lucien was more silent than usual. I didn’t have much work, so I just stayed quietly by his side.

The autumn leaves rustled. Lucien raised his hand to straighten my hair tossed by the wind and then touched his forehead to mine.

Lucien: That…. Are you capable of being unhappy?

A few words slipped quietly into my ears, making me a bit stunned. Lucien’s expression is still very pale. The corners of his raised mouth kept a fixed arc, and his eyes are brightened by the autumn light as they look straight at me.

I couldn’t help but take a breath. The cool greenery smells like flowers June, filling my whole heart and swelling my lungs.

MC: Of course I am.

Lucien breathed after hearing my answer, his mouth opening for a moment.

MC: Although I hope that on your birthday, you will be happy. But if you aren’t happy, I’ll be unhappy with you. I will be with you. I;ll spend all the unhappy times with you, so we can wait for the moment when happiness comes together.

“Happy Birthday” should be a blessing, not a shackle.

Lucien smiled. The bright autumn colours covered his eyes. It was just like the moment he explained on stage just minutes ago. I shook the cake box.

MC: So, where does Professor Xu want to spend this special day?

He raised his head and looked deeply into the distance.

Lucien: I thought of a place, but it’s a little far away. Would you like to go with me?

MC: Of course!

After a few hours’ drive, we came to an old street. Although it’s old, it seems like it’s constantly being repaired and refurbished. I visited this same place once when I was very young, and today’s scene is completely different from my vague memory.

People have soft memories of the old city always renovating every stone tile. Everything that had originally been put up is slowly being watered down. Until one day, quietly at the time, Lucien’s memory had always been good, but this time it seems to be slightly slow.

He would stop at a certain street corner and glance indifferently; he would also look around at the fork quietly, as if the choice was not in his memory.

I followed him quietly down the paved road. We climbed the ramp and went around for a long time. After a few confirmations, Lucien finally stopped. In front of us is a silent and empty space.

I secretly peeked at Lucien and found that his expression was still clear. It’s like looking into the distance without seeing anything in front of you. Across this open space, his eyes are vacant.

I retracted my eyes, also staring at the clearing in front of us. I feel faintly that I can guess where this place is.

Lucien: ___, let’s go sit there for a while.

Lucien pointed to a bench facing the clearing. I took his hand and sat there with him. The midday afternoon in late autumn was a bit cold, and the whole world was so quiet that the only sounds were our breathing, the exhaled white mist whirling in the air and disappearing silently.

I looked at the clearing, imagining what it once looked like. Maybe it used to hold a small bungalow in the old days, or it may have been a courtyard.

Lucien: There used to be a small bungalow here, do you know what it was like?

Lucien’s voice suddenly sounded. I was stunned, and momentarily even wondered if my imagination had a distinct sound to him.

MC: I saw that kind of house when I was a kid, but I can’t remember exactly.

Lucien: The bricks of the house were a little mottled white, and the roof was covered with red tiles. Because it’s on the hillside, they often blow away. On special occasions, a row of small blue and white flags would be hung on the leaves. When the leaves blew, it looked beautiful when sitting in the courtyard.

Following Lucien’s description, I closed my eyes while imagining the open space.

I felt Lucien holding my hand, and he wound our fingers together, holding them as close as possible. I was about to open my eyes when Lucien’s voice continued.

Lucien: Open the gate outside, you can walk into the yard.

MC: Will there be flowers in the yard? Lucien: Yes, there is a row of small flower beds on the left, but the owner is always busy, they often forget to water them. So, they don’t look too healthy. The door is in front of you. When you open it, there’ll be an occasional squeaking sound.

I nodded subconsciously, feeling as if I had really walked through the small yard and opened the door. Some stale air was opened along with it, welcoming the return of a long-lost gentle memory.

MC: What about after opening the door? There is an ordinary entryway. Where does ___ want to go?

MC: (you can choose between left, right, forward, and upstairs) I want to go right.

Lucien: On the right is the living room. Although it’s called the living room, there are actually bookshelves everywhere.

MC: Is there no study?

Lucien: In fact, it’s because the study can’t fit those books that the living room has filled up a bit. In the centre is a very soft sofa. In autumn, sunlight will shine through the floor-to-ceiling windows to the sofa.

Lucien: There is a set of very expensive speakers on the opposite side of the sofa. It was specially bought by the little boy’s father for the purpose of listening to classical music.

MC: It must be very comfortable to listen to music while reading a book on the sofa.

Lucien: Actually… the most comfortable place is the rocking chair by the french windows.

I felt a familiar temperature on my left side pushing slightly into me. Lucien seemed to have adjusted his posture to be leaning onto my shoulder.

Lucien: To the little boy in this house, the rocking chair at that time was just the right size for him. When he was tired from reading, he could turn over and sleep with a book. When the weather is good, the rocking chair will be gently moved by the wind.

I seem to be standing in the living room wrapped by bookshelves, and staring at the floor-to-ceiling windows. There was a small child, hugging the book in his hand tightly, and curled up in a slightly swaying rocking chair, sleeping in the brilliant autumn light.  

Maybe it’s just an ordinary dream, like his peaceful daily life, gentle and precious.

We returned to the hallway again.

Lucien: There is an ordinary entrance, where does ___ want to go?

MC: (given the same options, left, right, forward, and upstairs) I want to see the upstairs.

Lucien: There will be a staircase through the living room. When you step on the board, it will creak. Immediately after going upstairs, you will see a small living room.

MC: Is it also full of bookshelves?

Lucien smiled, soft laughter in my ears.

Lucien: Unfortunately, you’ve guessed correctly. Maybe I’ve remembered it wrongly, but this seems like not a place to live in, and rather a bookstore. But the little boy’s parents should distinguish between functions -- after all, it is a little closer to the study.

Lucien: If you are tired of reading books in the study, you can just walk out and continue in this small living room.

MC: And when you’re tired of reading in this small living room?

Lucien: Go down to the large living room and have a look.

I was amused by his banter. The whole house seems to be full of books at every corner, accompanying the people in this house to explore the ends of the world.

MC: What’s on the second floor?

Lucien: On the left side of the small living room, there is a long corridor. The first door is a large bedroom, and at the end, there is a room on each side. On the right is the study, which contains more materials, and the books placed highly are all professional books.

Lucien: At that time the little boy couldn’t even read the words on it. A large English-Chinese dictionary and English-English dictionary are placed next to each other.

MC: You must understand it now, right?

I said this with emotion, and Lucien on my side was a little silent. He seemed to be remembering something again, and slowly opened his mouth.

Lucien: I should have understood it when I was around sixteen or seventeen.

MC: ….

MC: Let’s leave this room that doesn’t belong to me.

The low laughter clung to me, making me almost want to open my eyes and tell him to respect the natural gap between people. But I thought about how there was one last room left, so I finally took a deep breath and decided to ignore the constant laughter.

MC: What about the room on the left?

Lucien: That’s the little boy’s room.

Following Lucien’s words, he steadily let me open the last door.

MC: Does this room also have a lot of books?

Lucien: No. There are no books in the little boy’s room. His parents don’t want him to read all the time, so they don’t let him bring books there.

MC: There was really no books?

Lucien: Actually, there are two books under the pillow.

When Lucien said this, I couldn’t help laughing.

Lucien: Here is a very small and ordinary bedroom, with a bed, wardrobe, and a little desk...

MC: Wait a minute, there is no book, what does the little boy do at the desk?

Lucien: He plays puzzle games.

MC: Huh?

Lucien: For example,  Kong Ming chess, chess, element matching card games…

MC: That doesn’t sound like a puzzle for children…

I couldn’t help but smile, and I got a deep laugh from Lucien.

MC: But.. it really seems to be an ordinary child’s bedroom.

Lucien: Because the special place lies elsewhere.

This time Lucien held my hand and stood up.

Lucien: Don’t open your eyes.

While Lucien said this, he pulled me forward into a walking pace.

Lucien: In the little boy’s house, there is a balcony.

The brilliant autumn light sides through my eyelids and hits my retina, shining slightly in the closed world. I felt as if I was really under Lucien’s lead. I closed my eyes and walked slowly across the bedroom, going to the balcony.

Lucien stopped and leaned into me from me.

Lucien: ___, open your eyes.

The gentle autumn breeze rolled up the golden osmanthus in the sky. At that moment, Lucien and I seemed to be standing on the balcony of the old house, fluttering colourful flags that fly happily in the wind. The mountains and flowers in front of me lay behind clouds shifting in the wind.

Lucien: The balcony of the boy’s room is the best place to see the scenery around here. There will be fireflies in the mountains on spring nights, like the secrets of the mountains. In the summer, the streets are always lively. The elderly will play chess on the side of the road, the children will play nearby, and they will also run to the observation deck on the mountain to see the fireworks.

Lucien: In autumn, when it rains, the sound of rain hitting the wood is very comfortable. The whale world is drenched by the splashing rain, and everything is in mist. It rarely snows in the winter, but there are very small snowflakes. He often imagined the whole mountain covered by heavy snow.

Lucien: The little boy’s father told him that the world is big, and there are many secrets in the world. You will meet them, and you will like them.

I open my eyes and stand in the middle of the open space, looking at the mountains. The mountains in front of us were nothing but empty silence. The golden osmanthus swayed slightly in the wind.

When we arrived at the viewing platform on the mountain, the sun had quietly descended.

Lucien: Sorry, I let you be with me all of today.

MC: If you can do more foolish things like today, I’ll be happier.

Lucien smiled lightly and took my hand, sitting in the long seat of the pavilion. The street lamps on the road up and down the mountain had begun to turn on, looking like small candles at first glance.

The same small handmade cake was finally put on the stone slab after a whole day of rushing. Looking at this cake, I thought of the old house in Lucien’s memory, and the little boy lying on the balcony looking into the distance.

MC: Lucien, how do you feel about yourself when you were a kid?

Lucien: Why did you ask so?

MC: Just suddenly curious.

Lucien was silent for a moment, but I didn’t look up at him, instead keeping my eyes on the decorated cake in his hand.

Lucien: So, what does ___ think about herself when she was a kid?

I raised my head and pursed my lips, looking at the blurry lights in the distant city.

MC: I miss her. She is clumsy. Also very reckless. She just did what seemed great at the time. Looking at the words she once said, I’m embarrassed and unable to look back on them without laughing at her.

MC: But, she was so sincere and brave. She made me the person I am now, and I am very grateful to her. I just don’t know if I’ve become the kind of person she imagined… if so, even enough.

Lucien: Yes. You must be the kind of person she wanted to be.

Lucien put his hand in his lap and looked at the dim lights with me.

Lucien: If I could see myself when I was child, I actually don’t know how I would feel. There were so many things that he didn’t understand at the time, so much he thought would have a specific answer. Including happiness, sadness, fear… and love.

Lucien’s voice is calm. It’s not so much talking about himself as a child, rather, he seemed to have pulled him away to simply evaluate an individual.

Lucien: He is very far away.

MC: No, you’re too harsh on him.

Lucien: What?

MC: “People are good at different things” Just like some people can’t understand science, his weaknesses are placed in a more special space. He may only understand those things more slowly, more deeply, and better in the future. And it is precisely that kind of person that gradually became the Lucien in front of me.

I light a candle. Against the light, Lucien’s face was extremely soft.

MC: Happy birthday, Lucien. Lucien has been working hard this year! If you were too far away when you were a child, just look at this year as your one-year-old self.

Lucien heard me say this, seemingly as if he hadn’t expected it. He looked at me with interest.

Lucien: Why do you say so?

MC: I think “birthdays” always cut life into different stages.

There is a new toy at 7 years old. I want to fall in love when I’m 15 years old, and want to take a good university entrance exam at the age of 18. Looking for a job at 22, and owning a house at 30…

“Birthday” seems to be an invisible reminder. You will look back on this day as a new person, and realise you’ve entered a new stage.

MC: Starting with a little Lucien, Lucien at every age is connected together to become the person he is now. This “year old” Lucien has used the academic report to mark the new year perfectly. He’s full of curiosity about the world and is still on the road to discovering the truth.

MC: He was a little nasty, always showing me questionable sides of things and teasing me… but such a Lucien is very good. I hope that future you can do what you want to do and become the person that you want to be.

MC: You don’t have to be happy all the time, but i hope that you can think of me first when you’re unhappy. Let me be with you always.

There are tiny petals of the golden osmanthus in the wind, like flowery waves reflected in the candlelight. Lucien’s eyes are shining brightly, filled with the night sky and autumn leaves.

Lucien: I will.

He did not say thank you as usual, but solemnly and sincerely left a promise, or even an oath.

Lucien: I’ve thought about my wish for this year.

Under the small candlelight, Lucien lowered his head, slowly raised his hand and wrapped his left fist in his right palm before looking straight at it. After a long time, he raised his head.

MC: Seems to me like you have a lot of wishes this year?

Lucien: I’m not only making a wish. There are also some words that I want to tell them.

Lucien looked at me. He didn’t explain who “they” were, just as he hadn’t explained the owner of the house. He knew I would know. Probably in this aspect, Lucien is actually very clumsy. And it’s this clumsiness that lets him become so real and complete.

MC: By the way, this is this year’s birthday present.

I took out the souvenir book from my bag that I had restored after a long time. It lies with a small wooden box with grids drawn over the lid, every part of it covered with stickers by me.

Lucien: It turns out that you’ve hidden a lot of things in your backpack.

MC: Maybe. This is our souvenir book this year. This year is also very thick.

Lucien slowly turned over the thick album. Summer camp in Yuelao Temple, Lucien’s home,the orphanage, in the classroom, the amusement park, the farm, the oil painting hall.

We have so many new memories.

MC: This is a previously out of print book. Although my craftsmanship isn’t very good, I did my best!

Lucien: you’ve worked hard, ___.

MC: This is the “Blind box project”!

I solemnly took out the small wooden box and started introducing it to Lucien.

MC: There’s a total of 60 grids. When you’re unhappy, just pick a grid to open. There may be gifts in it, a sentence, or a picture. The only requirement is that you must summon ___ to complete it with you.

Lucien: 365 days, and only 60 grids? (bahsdhj mood)

MC: Mr. Xu, 60 days of unhappiness is a lot. I hope you won’t open them all so quickly.

I went to stare at him a little furiously, but found his smiling eyes.

MC: You teased me again!

Lucien: ___, thank you.

The sky gradually darkened. The lights of the city slowly lit up under the mountain like a touch of gentle blessing. Maybe for anyone, the world was monochromatic at the beginning. With time and encounters, let it slowly be stained with colour, and give different people and things their own value.

Slowly, the whole world became colourful. It worked with memory, with smell and sound. After the most special existence appears, the colours of this world will be more distinctive. It’s like refreshing an entire picture, so that everything has a new meaning.

While we quietly shared the cake, I looked at Lucien’s face lit gently by the warm lights.

MC: Lucien, you’re now in colour.

Lucien froze for a moment, then smiled meaningfully. He ate the last bit of cake and finally sat next to me. It is rare that he carries such a sweet fragrance on his body, and even the breath that comes close is sweet.

Lucien: ___, to me, you are more than colour.

[dwellordream]

“…The complex design of the Victorian house signified the changing ratio between the cultural and physical work situated there. With its twin parlors, one for formal, the other for intimate exchange, and its separate stairs and entrances for servants, the Victorian house embodied cultural preoccupations with specialized functions, particularly distinguishing between public and private worlds.

American Victorians maintained an expectation of sexualized and intimate romanticism in private at the same time that they sustained increasingly ‘‘proper’’ expectations for conduct in public. The design of the house helped to facilitate the expression of both tendencies, with a formal front parlor designed to stage proper interactions with appropriate callers, and the nooks, crannies, and substantial private bedrooms designed for more intimate exchange or for private rumination itself.

Just as different areas of the house allowed for different gradations of intimacy, so did the house offer rooms designed for different users. The ideal home offered a lady’s boudoir, a gentleman’s library, and of course a children’s nursery. This ideal was realized in the home of Elizabeth E. Dana, daughter of Richard Henry Dana, who described her family members situated throughout the house in customary and specialized space in one winter’s late afternoon in 1865. Several of her siblings were in the nursery watching a sunset, ‘‘Father is in his study as usual, mother is taking her nap, and Charlotte is lying down and Sally reading in her room.’’ In theory, conduct in the bowels of the house was more spontaneous than conduct in the parlor.

This was partly by design, in the case of adults, but by nature in the case of children. If adults were encouraged to discover a true, natural self within the inner chambers of the house, children—and especially girls—were encouraged to learn how to shape their unruly natural selves there so that they would be presentable in company. The nursery for small children acknowledged that childish behavior was not well-suited for ‘‘society’’ and served as a school for appropriate conduct, especially in Britain, where children were taught by governesses in the nursery, and often ate there as well. In the United States children usually went to school and dined with their parents. As the age of marriage increased, the length of domestic residence for some girls extended to twenty years and more.

The lessons of the nursery became more indirect as children grew up. Privacy for children was not designed simply to segregate them from adults but was also a staging arena for their own calisthenics of self-discipline. A room of one’s own was the perfect arena for such exercises in responsibility. As the historian Steven Mintz observes, such midcentury advisers as Harriet Martineau and Orson Fowler ‘‘viewed the provision of children with privacy as an instrument for instilling self-discipline. Fowler, for example, regarded private bedrooms for children as an extension of the principle of specialization of space that had been discovered by merchants. If two or three children occupied the same room, none felt any responsibility to keep it in order.’’

…The argument for the girl’s room of her own rested on the perfect opportunity it provided for practicing for a role as a mistress of household. As such, it came naturally with early adolescence. The author Mary Virginia Terhune’s advice to daughters and their mothers presupposed a room of one’s own on which to practice the housewife’s art. Of her teenage protagonist Mamie, Terhune announced: ‘‘Mamie must be encouraged to make her room first clean, then pretty, as a natural following of plan and improvement. . . . Make over the domain to her, to have and to hold, as completely as the rest of the house belongs to you. So long as it is clean and orderly, neither housemaid nor elder sister should interfere with her sovereignty.’’ Writing in 1882, Mary Virginia Terhune favored the gradual granting of autonomy to girls as a natural part of their training for later responsibilities.

…Victorian parents convinced their daughters that the secret to a successful life was strict and conscientious self-rule. The central administrative principle was carried forth from childhood: the responsibility to ‘‘be good.’’ The phrase conveyed the prosecution of moralist projects and routines, and perhaps equally significant, the avoidance or suppression of temper and temptation. Being good extended beyond behavior and into the realm of feeling itself. Being good meant what it said—actually transfiguring negative feelings, including desire and anger, so that they ceased to become a part of experience.

Historians of emotion have argued that culture can shape temperament and experience; the historian Peter Stearns, for one, argues that ‘‘culture often influences reality’’ and that ‘‘historians have already established some connections between Victorian culture and nineteenth-century emotional reality.’’ More recently, the essays in Joel Pfister and Nancy Schnog’s Inventing the Psychological share the assumption that the emotions are ‘‘historically contingent, socially specific, and politically situated.’’ The Victorians themselves also believed in the power of context to transform feeling.

The transformation of feeling was the end product of being good. Early lessons were easier. Part of being good was simply doing chores and other tasks regularly, as Alcott’s writings suggest. One day in 1872 Alice Blackwell practiced the piano ‘‘and was good,’’ and another day she went for a long walk ‘‘for exercise,’’ made two beds, set the table, ‘‘and felt virtuous.’’ Josephine Brown’s New Year’s resolutions suggested such a regimen of virtue—sanctioned both by the inherent benefits of the plan and by its regularity.

As part of her plan to ‘‘make this a better year,’’ she resolved to read three chapters of the Bible every day (and five on Sunday) and to ‘‘study hard and understandingly in school as I never have.’’ At the same time, Brown realized that doing a virtuous act was never simply a question of mustering the positive energy to accomplish a job. It also required mastering the disinclination to drudge. She therefore also resolved, ‘‘If I do feel disinclined, I will make up my mind and do it.’’

The emphasis on forming steady habits brought together themes in religion and industrial culture. The historian Richard Rabinowitz has explained how nineteenth-century evangelicalism encouraged a moralism which rejected the introspective soul-searching of Calvinism, instead ‘‘turning toward usefulness in Christian service as a personal goal.’’ This pragmatic spirituality valued ‘‘habits and routines rather than events,’’ including such habits as daily diary writing and other regular demonstrations of Christian conduct. Such moralism blended seamlessly with the needs of industrial capitalism—as Max Weber and others have persuasively argued.

Even the domestic world, in some ways justified by its distance from the marketplace, valued the order and serenity of steady habits. Such was the message communicated by early promoters of sewing machines, for instance, one of whom offered the use of the sewing machine as ‘‘excellent training . . . because it so insists on having every-thing perfectly adjusted, your mind calm, and your foot and hand steady and quiet and regular in their motions.’’ The relation between the market place and the home was symbiotic. Just as the home helped to produce the habits of living valued by prudent employers, so, as the historian Jeanne Boydston explains, the regularity of machinery ‘‘was the perfect regimen for developing the placid and demure qualities required by the domestic female ideal.’’

Despite its positive formulation, ‘‘being good’’ often took a negative form —focusing on first suppressing or mastering ‘‘temper’’ or anger. The major target was ‘‘willfulness.’’ An adviser participating in Chats with Girls proposed the cultivation of ‘‘a perfectly disciplined will,’’ which would never ‘‘yield to wrong’’ but instantly yield to right. Such a will, too, could teach a girl to curb her unruly feelings. The Ladies’ Home Journal columnist Ruth Ashmore (a pseudonym for Isabel Mallon) more crudely warned readers ‘‘that the woman who allows her temper to control her will not retain one single physical charm.’’ As a young teacher, Louisa May Alcott wrestled with this most common vice.

Of her struggles for self-control, she recognized that ‘‘this is the teaching I need; for as a school-marm I must behave myself and guard my tongue and temper carefully, and set an example of sweet manners.’’ Alcott, of course, made a successful career out of her efforts to master her maverick temper. The autobiographical heroine of her most successful novel, Little Women, who has spoken to successive generations of readers as they endured female socialization, was modeled on her own struggles to bring her spirited temperament in accord with feminine ideals.

So in practice being good first meant not being bad. Indeed, it was some- times better not to ‘‘be’’ much at all. Girls sometimes worked to suppress liveliness of all kinds. Agnes Hamilton resolved at the beginning of 1884 that she would ‘‘study very hard this year and not have any spare time,’’ and also that she would try to stop talking, a weakness she had identified as her principle fault.

When Lizzie Morrissey got angry she didn’t speak for the rest of the evening, certainly preferable to impassioned speech. Charlotte Perkins Gilman, who later critiqued many aspects of Victorian repression, at the advanced age of twenty-one at New Year’s made her second resolution: ‘‘Correct and necessary speech only.’’

Mary Boit, too, measured her goodness in terms of actions uncommitted. ‘‘I was good and did not do much of anything,’’ she recorded ambiguously at the age of ten. It is perhaps this reservation that provoked the reflection of southerner Lucy Breckinridge, who anticipated with excitement the return of her sister from a long trip. ‘‘Eliza will be here tomorrow. She has been away so long that I do not know what I shall do to repress my joy when she comes. I don’t like to be so glad when anybody comes.’’ Breckinridge clearly interpreted being good as in practice an exercise in suppression. This was just the lesson of self-censoring that Alice James had starkly described as ‘‘‘killing myself,’ as some one calls it.’’

This emphasis on repressing emotion became especially problematic for girls in light of another and contradictory principle connected with being good. A ‘‘good’’ girl was happy, and this positive emotion she should express in moderation. Explaining the duties of a girl of sixteen, an adviser writing in the Ladies’ Home Journal noted that she should learn ‘‘that her part is to make the sunshine of the home, to bring cheer and joyousness into it.’’ At the same time that a girl must suppress selfishness and temper, she must also project contentment and love. Advisers simply suggested that a girl employ a steely resolve to substitute one for the other. ‘‘Every one of my girls can be a sunshiny girl if she will,’’ an adviser remonstrated. ‘‘Let every failure act as an incentive to greater success.’’

This message could be concentrated into an incitement not to glory and ethereal virtue but simply to a kind of obliging ‘‘niceness.’’ This was the moral of a tale published in The Youth’s Companion in 1880. A traveler in Norway arrives in a village which is closed up at midday in mourning for a recent death. The traveler imagines that the deceased must have been a magnate or a personage of wealth and power. He inquires, only to be told, ‘‘It is only a young maiden who is dead. She was not beautiful nor rich. But oh, such a pleasant girl.’’ ‘‘Pleasantness’’ was the blandest possible expression of the combined mandate to repress and ultimately destroy anger and to project and ultimately feel love and concern.

Yet it was a logical blending of the religious messages of the day as well. Richard Rabinowitz’s work on the history of spirituality notes a new later-century current which blended with the earlier emphasis on virtuous routines. The earlier moralist discipline urged the establishment of regular habits and the steady attention to duty. Later in the century, religion gained a more experiential and private dimension, expressed in devotionalism. Both of these demands—for regular virtue and the experience and expression of religious joy—could provide a loftier argument for the more mundane ‘‘pleasant.’’

…The challenges of this project were particularly bracing given the acute sensitivity of the age to hypocrisy. One must not only appear happy to meet social expectations: one must feel the happiness. The origins of this insistence came not only from a demanding evangelical culture but also from a fluid social world in which con artists lurked in parlors as well as on riverboats. A young woman must be completely sincere both in her happiness and in her manners if she was not to be guilty of the corruptions of the age. One adviser noted the dilemma: ‘‘‘Mamma says I must be sincere,’ said a fine young girl, ‘and when I ask her whether I shall say to certain people, ‘‘Good morning, I am not very glad to see you,’’ she says, ‘‘My dear, you must be glad to see them, and then there will be no trouble.’’’’’

…No wonder that girls filled their journals with mantras of reassurance as they attempted to square the circle of Victorian emotional expectation. Anna Stevens included a separate list stuck between the pages of her diary. ‘‘Everything is for the best, and all things work together for good. . . . Be good and you will be happy. . . . Think twice before you speak.’’

We look upon these aphorisms as throwaways—platitudes which scarcely deserve to be preserved along with more ‘‘authentic’’ manuscript material. Yet these mottoes, preserved and written in most careful handwriting in copy books and journals, represent the straws available to girls attempting to grasp the complex and ultimately unreconcilable projects of Victorian emotional etiquette and expectation.”

- Jane H. Hunter, “Houses, Families, Rooms of One Own.” in How Young Ladies Became Girls: The Victorian Origins of American Girlhood