#I loved getting all the unhinged reactions throughout

[ali-mart]

Sabine Wren [Commission] - request was Sabine in “that poncho” in “that pose” and maaaaan did I love making this. Truly a delightful comm.

[rabbitsrants]

SHINICHI KUDO IS TOO MUCH

guys, i'm currently working on the "reasons why shinran is one of the most brilliantly written romances of all time" masterlist and i came across this part of the manga:

chapter 44

AND I AM LAUGHING MY ASS OFF

shinichi is absolutely RUTHLESS in this chapter. correct me if i'm wrong, but this has to be his angriest moment throughout the entire series? i don't remember him acting this way in any other chapter 😂 like... shinichi is the type of guy who saves murderers from suicide, it's a well known fact that he values human life more than anything, HE'S A DEEPLY IDEALISTIC PERSON, YALL, THAT'S THE MAIN TRAIT THAT DEFINES HIM AS A PERSON and he straight up tells this dude (whos about to slit his own throat btw) TO GO AHEAD AND KILL HIMSELF

this is the most unhinged i've ever seen him 😂

now, let me be serious for a second. obviously, shinichi strongly suspected that the culprit wouldnt go through with it - he spent the entire case trying to cover up his murder after all, that's not something a suicidal person does. still though. the fact that shinichi was willing to risk it says so much about his love for ran. cause that's what his rant is about. the culprit tried to kill ran on multiple occasions and almost succeeded a couple of times. if there's one thing that shinichi can not handle, it's ran being in danger. he'll lose his composure every single time and he will lash out, even at innocent people who are just trying to help:

chapter 640

this man is so devoted to ran, it hurts.

that's why im so shocked everytime the fandom implies that ran is an irrelevant character who doesnt contribute anything to the story. if (for whatever reason) ran stopped being in the picture, the story would end right then and there.

people seem to forget that shinichi has prioritized ran over cases on numerous occasions (that aspect of their relationship deserves its own post tbh, i'll hopefully get to it in the future), he completely loses his mind everytime there's even the slightest risk that she might get hurt and this case right here? chapter 44? that's the wildest shit shinichi has ever said 😂 the part about justice was spot on and very in character for him, but the rest? it was brutal... and very unlike him. which is shocking, considering that ran was completely unharmed. do me a favor and let that sink in: the end of chapter 44 was merely his reaction to the thought of losing ran - he completely lost his shit. now, if ran actually stopped being in his life? shinichi wouldn't just lose his temper, he'd lose himself.

for the record, this isnt me implying that he would go rogue or whatever. the reason why shinichi is so angry in chapter 44 is because ran is okay and tangible, so he still has something to lose. but if she was gone? if she stopped being his life? he wouldn't be angry, he'd be inconsolable. if the level of anger displayed in chapter 44 and 640 is what we get when shinichi simply worries about ran's safety, just imagine the level of heartbreak that we would witness if he genuinely lost her.

shinichi loves and needs ran so much, it's unfathomable for most people, including me. everytime i think i cracked the case and finally figured out how much shinichi loves ran, he proves me wrong. and while i think that most cold cases are a tragedy, i think im coming to terms with leaving this one unresolved. after all, love is the most mysterious force in the universe. and always will be.

visit the shinran library for more

[im-this-kind-of-girl]

Aziraphale and Crowley's unhinged character analyzis (pt2. Crowley)

Controversial opinion:

Aziraphale and Crowley at the end of Season2 managed to accomplish the main goal they each had since the beginning of time. Only to realize that what they wanted no longer made them happy.

Disclaimer: I have no idea about what is going to happen in Good Omens. This analysis could clearly be considered a theory since I'm not Neil Gaiman, but as someone who knows about narrative and character structure, I'm going to elaborate. Also, English is not my first language, so sorry in advance.

I've already talked about Aziraphale's possible transformation arc in the Good Omens story. In here I've also written important definitions such as what's a transformation arc. I highly recommend it to read it first.

Now it's time to talk about Crowley.

Crowley, the co-protagonist and love interest.

In our role as audience, Crowley is the character with whom one tends to empathize the quickest. By the end of the second season, most would be tempted to think Crowley was right. However, this is a lie. Not only is Crowley not right, but he rejected Aziraphale just the same, choosing his principles over love.

Now, why in the first instance do we not see it that way? Well, because we have Aziraphale's point of view. We always get the angel's reaction first, we always see the way Crowley shows up again and again and again to rescue him unconditionally.

Very rarely do we have a moment where Crowley is alone in crisis because his beliefs are challenged. No, everything he does is in function of Aziraphale and we see the story from his perspective, that is, from the perspective of someone who is in love with Crowley. Because of this, Crowley is equally liked and attractive to everyone equally: we are inside Aziraphale's in love POV.

By the time Crowley proposes Aziraphale to run away together, we as the audience are seeing a proposal that is incredibly tempting to us: we want Aziraphale to accept it because it's what Aziraphale really wants. That's why the fight hurts so much, because we know internally that the two of them had the chance to be together but didn't because they're not ready yet.

Crowley's Objective

Crowley, unlike Aziraphale, was happy in Season 2 with his current situation. Having cut ties with both Heaven and Hell pleased him, because Crowley always sought only one goal throughout his entire life: freedom.

The one thing Crowley has always desired is to be himself with no excuses and no strings attached.

Since before the beginning of time, Crowley came to the conclusion that he didn't fit in Heaven. He thought he would fit in Hell, but soon realized that it was like a deteriorated version of Heaven, so he didn't fit in there either. On Earth he doesn't quite fit in either. Sure, he likes humans, has a certain admiration and curiosity for them, but he still considers them a species far different from his own. He is not human and never will be, so he can't really identify with them at all. He enjoys the advantages of humanity, but he is not one of them.

The Job episode is an indicator of this, he himself says so "I am a demon who goes along with Hell as far as I can".

In this same episode, however, the major problem he has with this is also expressed. Azira tells him "that sounds lonely". The counterpart of freedom is loneliness. To be truly free, you need to have nothing and nothing to bind you. That's why Crowley is someone who is unsympathetic and even disinterested in dealing with third parties. He does not remember faces or names, he does not get significantly close to anyone because that would compromise his desire for genuine independence.

This characteristic is the only one that is present in absolutely all versions of Crowley: the book, radio drama and even in the cursed script of the movie that never was. That's why whenever he sees danger, his first reaction is to run away.

Being free he has nothing to lose… or does he?

Crowley's dilemma

Well, Crowley never fit in by being different and so he always felt somewhat an outcast. However, it wasn't long before he noticed that Aziraphale was also different.

Clearly the angel was not like the other angels in Heaven: he enjoyed Earth, he fell into temptations, he lied to other angels. Also, it is obvious that he would not fit in Hell, and while he is more empathetic to humans, he is still innocently aloof. Aziraphale has a pure goodness that Crowley admires, the goodness that made him be kind to the demon in the first place.

Moreover, no matter the time, no matter how little they knew each other, Aziraphale could always see through Crowley's evil masquerade. The demon could burn goats and murder people, and yet Aziraphale has always held a blind faith towards him. Crowley, the Serpent of Eden, who had been his entire existence told that he's doomed to be a crawling tempter, finds in the angel an unexpected possible friend who's never been afraid or bothered by him.

Crowley eventually feels they are both the same: two supernatural entities left on Earth who learned to enjoy life on their own terms. Crowley sees in Aziraphale the companionship he never thought he'd find, the friend he thought at the moment he fell he'd never have. And that feeling of companionship and admiration slowly morphed into something more until it became love.

The season finale isn't the first time Crowley has considered leaving Earth. Probably not even his fight in Season 1 was the first time he considered it. Yet he never did. He never could because, without Aziraphale, running away would doom him to a life of solitude. Free, sure, but completely alone since no one except his angelic friend could understand him.

However, I think Crowley is not aware of what he feels. Or at least, he hasn't been for a long time. I'm sure his moment of introspection about his feelings was when Nina confronted him about it. Up to this point, Crowley considered Aziraphale his best and only friend, obviously. Crowley is loyal to a fault and always thought his relationship with Aziraphale was perfect just the way it was, but suddenly someone put it into words and he realized that yes, that's what he really wants with Aziraphale.

Crowley's decision

Crowley wants his freedom. That's why he never asked Aziraphale for explanations (because at the end of the day they were just friends), that's why he never told him that he was living in his car (because he would end up depending on him), that's why he never talked about his fall (because that would be opening up too much).

The most ironic thing about the whole ending, is that just like Crowley did with Aziraphale… Aziraphale proposed to Crowley the one thing he wants more than anything: to be together, for good, but sacrificing his freedom.

Crowley is capable of doing anything for his angel, even without acknowledging that what they had was love. He's capable of driving on fire, capable of killing Gabriel, capable of walking inside a church. Of everything except one thing.

It's the one step Crowley didn't dare take. He is not a martyr like the angel, no, he is not willing to sacrifice himself to be together. So, the obvious happened: Crowley chose his freedom over Aziraphale just as Aziraphale chose Heaven over Crowley.

The end of his arc and Aziraphale.

As I said before, I don't think Crowley will have a significant change comparable to Aziraphale's. His personality and beliefs will not be changed in a momentous way, as Crowley no longer has ties to Heaven or Hell by pulling the tab on both sides.

His side is already picked: Humanity.

His biggest change is likely to be one of purpose. Crowley is no longer going to be satisfied with his freedom. And the latter is a fact: Crowley is officially free. Without Aziraphale in the equation, he no longer has anything or anyone tying him to do anything or be any other than who he truly is. Crowley can go to Alpha Centauri and never come back; he can sleep for 3,000 years; he can go around the world in the Bentley. He can do whatever he wants. This might seem ideal to the Crowley of 300 years ago, but today's Crowley is completely consumed by loneliness.

Crowley never cared about building a home or having material things because he never wanted to be tied to anything earthly for the sake of doubt. He was always aware of the destruction of the Earth.

Love is not something that can be prevented though, and in the absence of having a home, he found it in Aziraphale.

Aziraphale: trustworthy, sweet, warm, funny, a bit of bastard but always irrevocably good. Everything Crowley lost when he fell he almost automatically found back.

To this day I wonder what Crowley is going to do now that his angel is gone and the possibility of him fleeing to the stars is becoming more and more possible. It's going to depend a lot on how much time passes between seasons, but I don't think it will be much. For not only he was his anchor, no, without Aziraphale, he doesn't have someone to cause him to want to do better, he doesn't have someone to be vulnerable with, he doesn't have a goal anymore, nobody else to impress.

He isn't evil. He isn't good. And now, he is alone.

First Crowley lost the love of God and now the love of Aziraphale. And it is then that Crowley will realize that what he really wants is not to be free, but to be loved. And this desire can only be fulfilled by the love of his life, Aziraphale.

The thing is... Crowley has always wondered why.

Why falling? Why becoming the cursed Serpent? Why could he never be truly free?

At the end of his arc, he must come to the conclusion that the answer was always in front of him:

Love is the only answer he needs.

[charliemwrites]

Ok but anon is onto something! I kinda think the same way where feral is the only pet in the au and it’s more her interactions with the 141 boys. I’m saying that…can I request feral gets kidnapped or taken from simons very secure house and the 141 boys reactions (price in particular cause even tho she’s a hell cat he still loves her)

Hell yeah, bean, that’s totally valid! This au was originally made with only Feral in mind so that’s fair.

They would be furious, barely keeping it together. Simon is murderous, damn near unhinged. It the closest anyone’s seen to him losing it. Working 24/7 to get her back. But fun fact! She’s microchipped. It doesn’t take long at all to find out where she’s being kept. And with it - who and why.

Oh, they go about this as the most important operation they’ve ever handled. It’s planned to the last detail, every little contingency accounted for. There’s no room for the slightest error. They don’t make any.

It’s a bloodbath from start to finish. Ghost goes on a rampage and everyone sweeps in after him to clean up. They find his feral at the very back of the tiniest room, with two men trying to wrangle her while she kicks and screams and fights like a hell cat.

Simon’s never been prouder.

In the aftermath, she has awful dreams. They end up all staying over together, just to be there with her when she wakes, afraid she’s not home anymore. They trade off with her throughout the day, making sure she’s never alone.

She cries in front of each of them at least once, thanks them for coming after her. Simon often finds her curled up with a member of the team, awake or asleep - even price. They’ve never gotten along better, actually.

[cineflections]

You know, if there was one manga that would be adapted to live action and succeed, I never would have guessed it to be this one.

I'm ofc talking about the One Piece Live Action on Netflix

A whole day binge right after release, I was READY, and thankfully, I was not disappointed. There are cuts and streamlining of the story, characters coming in earlier than in the manga/anime, and some of the emotional bits don't hit as hard as in the original. Still, I can feel the love the production team has of One Piece. The characters are goofy and lovable, but they are also serious and straight-faced.

One thing that I noticed throughout was the constant close up to faces and sometimes straight on, as if almost breaking the 4th wall. The very first scene with Luffy is like this, but there he DOES look into the camera directly, but the pov of the camera is revealed to be a newsbird. It's like a statement that they know this is a silly pirate romp, they know that some people will not take this seriously, but they will not do 4th wall breaks silly, but in-universe silly. Does that make sense?

I laughed at several points in the show, big and wide smile on my face and pointing at the screen several times...

But I do wonder how much of my laugh was on the show's on merit or if I was only calling back on the the source material. At times I did feel the straw hat crew not being as iconic as in the manga/anime. The extreme reactions, the over the top noises and actions, at the same time I realize that real people generally don't act like that.

I appreciate the show runners attention to details. Putting stuff in to tease future arcs, adapting some cover stories, some of the complete unhinged behaviors of characters (Garp I'm looking at you!).

This show adapted Romance Dawn, orange town, syrup village, baratie, and arlong park.

There are so many moments that are almost scene by scene taken from the manga. Luffy in the barrel and meeting Koby. Alvida with her giant spike club. We got to see some pre-captured Zoro moments (particularly him killing a baroque works agent!), Nami being a sneak.

Then we meet the one and only clown Buggy! They hammed him up, they made him a showman and a real clown (with a real bulgy nose as well, props!). I loved Buggy. Goddamn what a show stealer. Excellent casting, his devil fruit was show cased so well and it looked good!

Usopp's introduction is the most changed. The kids are gone and the Black Cat pirates never call in the entire crew or Jango. Instead of the fight on the slope by the beach it's instead in Kaya's house from which they cannot escape. The actor for Kuro nailing the mannerism and hand movements, altho his "teleporting" looks a bit wonky.

With Baratie we are finally introduced to Sanji! Who's British now 😆. And Mihawk's introduction tho! Badass and just so over the top and goofy. I love him so much! This is where we got the biggest change where we instead get Arlong and crew coming in smashing the place up (a tiny bit). Arlong may not be as tall as he should be but I love the practical approach instead of CGI, which means he actually feels present! All the fishmen we see are guys in costume and prosthetics!

Arlong Park felt a bit more rushed than the earlier parts, but I do think they nailed *that* scene tho.

If the bar for live action adaptation was below the ground, I would say now there's a new bar, which is on the ground 😅. I think it's a solid show but it might be my bias talking. I do have some gripes tho.

One thing that was constant in East Blue Saga was how much village people hate or are scared of pirates. I think they got the marines right, and the pirates, but they failed to really have the village people be a character in their own right. In the manga and anime the villagers are mostly a monolith who will think and act alike in situations and be part of the happenings either by watching or fighting. We got just about none of it here, except a mention in Arlong Park. They did some really good and cool world building with lots of people populating the sets in the background - but that's it, they're just extras to fill out the screen. There are ofc a few exceptions but I felt it was not enough.

I wish they had Luffy be more agile when using his gum-gum powers. Whenever he springs a pistol or a whip is stands in place, which I found boring (and they did so well with Zoro's fights!). I do think the explanation is that they decided for Luffy to be coming into his powers as we go. That we will learn with him all the things he can do (him not knowing he can blow himself up like a balloon proves this). I hope that in season 2 (please netflix!) they show the growth in his fighting!

But to end this long post. I just wanna say how much I fucking love the dude playing Mihawk. Goddamn he's so fun. MVP.

For the straw hats, I would say that Usopp feels the closest to manga version, and Luffy feels the most distant from it. But I don't dislike this, and I think the actor for Luffy has so much potential to really make the role his own.

It will never be "just like" the manga and anime, but that's ok! It's a new adaptation (in live action) made by people you can tell loves the source material and really really tried to make it work! I respect that, and I respect this show. Please watch it on Netflix! It's a fun and silly time, just like it should be!

[lemotmo]

Unfortunately, probably so

Q. He's been on set. They're just not showing him there yet. You're out of your mind if you think he's not there.

Q. Honest thoughts: is he going to be in season 8 or no?

A. I don't believe he has been on set yet, anon. I do think he will be there but it's pretty obvious that he hasn't been there yet. Perhaps you can check the fake Twitter account for his exact whereabouts. Second anon, yes I believe he will be around for at least most of 8a. I don't think we will see that much of him but I think he'll be around. I don't trust Tim at all to not play with that dynamic a bit. He has said several times in the past that he hasn't defined Buddie yet because he likes the idea of relationship drama. If the plan is actually Buddie, I don't think he will be able to resist using Tommy to create some drama. Once he puts Buck/Eddie together that is it relationship wise, that is their endgame so drama for them, at least in the way Tim talks about things, will have to be manufactured in other ways. I love a lot of things about Tim but I don't trust him at all to not use Tommy to build up the drama pre Buddie. Especially if they did bring in Lone Star writers. They just write completely differently tone wise. I absolutely loathe the idea because it will be virtually unbearable around here throughout that entire process, and it's possible, given the behavior that Tim became aware of, that he changed direction a bit, but I still don't trust him to get there in the best way. It's just too easy of a route to take. There have been a few people who managed to figure out that the cameo videos came to a stop around the same time they started writing for the season. So along with whatever conversation took place, I'm sure Lou got his final episode count and just decided to go ahead and walk away from them. So while I think his return will still only be a handful of episodes I think it's going to be a rough handful of episodes. If I get canon Buddie out of the drama I don't care how we get there, but I know lots of people do so I want to try and prepare myself now. And once it becomes apparent that Tommy is just drama in the lead up to Buddie his people are going to become downright unbearable. I'm very excited about lots of things but I just want to get his part over with.

For the record, anon, I'm praying like crazy that I'm wrong. I want to be wrong. I want to be wrong so badly.

Thank you Nonny!

Yeah, I also expect Lou there for a few more scenes. It'll suck to find out that he's on set. Not because of him specifically, because it will give the storyline a fitting ending on screen and it might be interesting to watch it play out for Buck as a character. (Even though I agree that, if Tim really wanted to, he could make Buddie happen without the Tommy factor involved.)

But because of the reaction of a certain subset of the fandom. The loud Tommy stans will be proclaiming that Lou is there as a main now and he's going to ask Buck to marry him or something unhinged like that. And then when they realise, during season 8, that BT's relationship isn't going to last very long, they'll throw a loud tantrum like a bunch of 5 year olds who don't get a sweet before dinner.

I'm just over all of that nonsense.

What this fandom needs right now is some peace without a very loud minority trying to harsh our buzz.

Also, to be honest... I don't care how they make Buddie canon either. I've been here for 6 seasons now. I'm tired. The time is now. However they do it, I'll just be happy about it, no matter how it happens.

And finally, I'm also manifesting that Ali (and me as well) is wrong. Very very wrong indeed. Sorry my dear. :)

IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!

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Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[chameleon66]

Laugh for Me!

Ships: Intrulogical (Logan x Remus)

Word count: 2785

Warnings: Censored swearing, Remus being Remus, mild angst, tickling, pranks, teasing (Let me know if I need to add anyhting)

Remus was unhinged in every way possible, good and bad. Part of the reasoning behind it was just who he was. I mean he is the personification of every morbid, sexual or intrusive thought that danced its way through Thomas’s head so no one could really blame him for being himself. But another part of it was because he enjoyed others' reactions to it, every reaction he got.

When Patton would scream in terror or when Virgil would hiss at him, it all filled him with glee. He loved observing the other sides reactions to his antics and figuring out what freaked them out and what didn’t freak them out.

But one reaction he did love getting from others was laughter, other’s laughing just made his heart figuratively explode in his chest. So after stewing on the fact that he enjoyed making other people laugh for a fraction of a second he created a new experiment and so began “Operation make every side laugh and figure out what makes them laugh so he can exploit it whenever necessary and also think of a shorter name for this operation.”

Surprisingly Virgil was the easiest one to figure out with minimal research, he laughed whenever Patton made a pun and Remus couldn’t tell at first if it was because it annoyed Logan when Patton made puns or if he actually liked them, so he would have to gather more data.

Luckily after some spying, he found that even when Logan wasn’t in the room when Patton made puns, the jokes always made Virgil laugh, quite honestly he was expecting something very different from ‘Charlie Frown’. But he wrote it down in his notes nonetheless as Virgil’s Hysterical Hacker (That's the name he came up with).

Patton was also elementary to figure out, as the happiest side he would laugh at a lot of things. At first Remus thought that Patton’s Hysterical Hacker would also be puns but it occurred to him Patton didn’t really laugh at puns, even if they weren’t made by himself but then Remus made a discovery.

One day as he went to the kitchen to fetch one of his Cock shaped popsicles from the fridge he found Patton sitting in the kitchen on the computer laughing like a hyena of helium, Remus almost had to be concerned if he was breathing or not.

When he asked Patton what was so funny he was shown a twenty minute compilation video of cat videos on youtube. Some cat’s fell into boxes and others played with balls of yarn but regardless it all made Patton squeal so Remus wrote ‘Cat videos’ down as Patton’s Hysterical Hacker.

Roman took a bit of investigating but as it turned out the answer was right in front of Remus' face, it was rooted in his dear twin brother’s love of Disney. One family love night it was Roman’s turn to choose the movie and he went with a Winnie the Pooh movie much to Remus’s, Janus’s and Logan’s displeasure.

Watching the movie was like folding socks level boring but then something caught Remus interest, after the gang tried to catch a ‘Backson’ all of them fell down a hole except for Piglet who then was challenged to find something to get them out of the hole with.

Piglet’s attempts were all stupid and fueled by miscommunication between Piglet and Rabbit. The scene wasn’t what caught Remus’s interest though it was Prince's not so charming reaction that got him listening.

Roman was rolling with laughter throughout the scene which led Remus’s to the ever so boring conclusion that Roman’s hysterical hacker was, family humor. Something that could be found in every Disney movie ever to exist.

Remus still wrote it down though and moved to the next side.

Janus was a challenge, despite having lived with him in the darkisde of the mindscape for most of his life, Janus never really went into hysterics, sure he’d chuckle but that was all Remus usually saw out of him.

But Remus did get an idea, Janus always seemed to be amused at other’s pain or displeasure like when Logan would get a papercut and Patton would insist on kissing it better or when Virgil’s pet spider Kat would escape his room and Patton would jump on the table and scream.

So as an experiment Remus poured a big helping of salt into Roman’s coffee one morning and when Roman began screaming of how it felt like he was ‘drinking the water of cold, unforgiving and salty seas’ Janus went into his deep villainous belly laugh at the scene. While Logan just rolled his eyes and Patton ran up to Roman all concerned like the father figment he was.

(Virgil was still asleep because he’s not a morning person)

That result said it all, Janus’s Hysterical hacker was another's pain/misfortune. Remus beamed as he wrote it down in his notes.

Hysterical Hackers

Emo widow — puns

Daddy — cat videos

Romano Cheese — family friendly humor

Lies and dulls — other’s pain

Logie bear —

But as Remus finished writing he came to a realization, there was one side left to figure out. His boyfriend. Logan.

You’d think that being his lover Remus could figure out his Hysterical Hacker with ease but now that Remus was thinking about it, he hadn’t really seen Logan laugh before. Maybe he had seen him chuckle once or twice but Remus couldn’t even recall a specific time he saw Logan do that.

That realization made Remus feel sad, He couldn’t remember a time his own boyfriend, the freaking light of his light, had laughed.

But that realization also made Remus more determined than ever to complete his research project. He'd make Logan laugh even if it was the last thing he would ever do.

It was time to get serious. Logan as the logical side didn’t spend time doodling on emotions or things like that so Remus had little to go off of. So that meant he’d need to experiment.

Remus cracked joke after joke around Logan day after day but came up empty handed each time.

Remus upped his pranking game on all of the other sides but each time Logan observed a prank happening he would only roll his eyes at the display.

Remus spied on Logan for hours on end but he got nothing even, when Logan was alone he wouldn’t laugh at anything.

Remus kept trying day after day to get Logan to laugh, he kept getting more and more desperate for it. It almost became like a craving to hear Logan laugh; it was starting to drive Remus insane. He just had to hear Logan laugh, he just had to!

After a full week, Remus had run out of patience so that meant he would need to get information straight from the source and not through spying, experiments or research.

“Logan, I need your help.” Remus rose up into Logan’s room with no warning and interrupted the rhythm of clattering keys of Logan’s computer.

Logan turned in his spinnable desk chair to face his boyfriend, Logan’s rise teemed with interest. They had collaborated on many different projects together and it only made sense really, they were a perfect pair for answering questions.

“Yes Remus, how may I be of assistance?” Logan asked, pushing his glasses up his nose.

Remus didn’t hesitate before he started explaining his predicament to Logan.

“So I started this research project a few weeks ago about what each of the sides hysterical hackers are.”

Logan’s head tilted to the side like a curious puppy’s would.

“Hysterical Hacker?”

“What makes each side laugh, like really laugh.” Remus contextualized

“Ok, please continue.”

“So after I figured out the other’s Hysterical Hackers and I moved on to yours but I couldn’t really find anything that makes you laugh even after I did experiments, observations, you know that sciency stuff you're supposed to do.”

Logan gave a hum of understanding before he got up from his desk chair before speaking again. “I must admit I don’t have much of a sense of humor.”

“Well I could tell that much.” Remus joked sarcastically but inside he was bursting with curiosity. He had come to find out what makes Logan laugh but it appeared that even Logan didn’t know.

“But if you wish, I can help you gather more data.” Logan offered and Remus didn’t hesitate before he responded.

“Yes, so where do we start Logie?”

“Firstly I’d like to hear what results you got with the other’s”

“Well P*ssys is family disney humor, papa bear’s is cat videos, Double dee’s is other pain and tickle me emo ‘s is pun of all things.”

Logan's face tinged with a blush and Remus wondered for a minute if it was something he said. Logan didn’t mind Remus’s colorful vocabulary and his usual reaction to it was an eyeroll, so what prompted the blushing?

Logan centered himself and pushed more words out. “I see, well then since everyone’s Hysterical Hacker is different, we can assume that mine is different too.”

“Lo lo are you ok, your face is all red?”

“I’m quite alright Remus.” Logan’s answer however did not satisfy Remus and he didn’t need the snake like lie detector to know Logan wasn’t telling him the truth. So Remus did the only Logical thing.

Remus ran forward full speed at Logan and tackled Logan down to the floor, sitting on his hips and hands pushing down on his belly to keep him down

“Re–Remus what are you doing?” Logan’s voice was up a few ocatives and the blush on his face got redder and spread across his face.

“You are going to tell me why you are all blushy or I will leave at the top of a broken ferris wheel until you confess!” Remus never made an empty threat and Logan knew this all too well.

“I’m fine–just get your hands off–off me!” Logan's voice also sounded a bit strained and Remus could help but wonder why. That’s when he noticed Logan’s belly trembling under his hands and before Remus could truly think it through he began skimming his fingers over Logan’s tummy.

Logan’s lips flattened and he bit down on his bottom lip which was enough for Remus to understand.

“Aww… is the nerd ticklish?” Remus asked in a baby voice that made Logan so flustered he couldn’t even get words out.

But that still answered Remus' question, Remus found a way to make Logan laugh and he’d say now was a pretty good time to exploit it.

Given Logan seemed to be able to hold in his laughter while Remus was tickling his tummy that meant it wasn’t his weak spot and that meant Remus would need to experiment some.

“Where are you ticklish Starlight?” Remus asked, pausing the movement of his hands for Logan to catch his breath and answer. Remus, being smart, also pulled both of Logan's hands above his head and put them both in his left hand freeing his right hand for tickling.

“I am not ticklish!” Logan insisted, which was the biggest lie Remus ever heard.

“Oh ok, so if I were to pinch your side then you wouldn’t react?” Remus' hand went to pinch Logan’s side and Logan’s mouth tightened around itself probably in an effort to not laugh.

“You need to laugh!” Remus stated. “I command you to laugh for me!” With that being said Remus started scribbling his nails into Logan’s side and then it was all over.

“Ahhhhhahahahahahah no no no REEhehehmush nohahahahahahaht there.” Logan’s laugh was so sweet and light and Remus became addicted to it almost instantly.

“No way Jose, now I need to find all of your tickle spots, so you make things easy and just tell me where your tickle spot is or I can tickle you everywhere until I find it.” Both of Remus’s options were not what Logan was hoping for but Remus was so adorable and maybe he would go easy on him if just told him.

All taken into consideration Logan got out in between laughs “Knees” and Remus did not need to told twice.

Remus let go of Logan’s hands and turned around and sat on Logan’s thighs. Remus' hands went onto Logan's knees and gave them each a squeeze, Logan let out a squeal and his leg began thrashing around, trying to escape.

“Someone’s got very ticklish knees.” Remus smirked at Logan as he began to trace circles around them which got Logan giggling. “But I don’t think your knees are what I’m looking for.”

“Wehehehehehell whahahahat are you lohohohahahaking for?” Logan’s speech was infested with giggles and it made the ever so stoic logical side look a little sillier.

“Your Hysterical Hacker of course!” Remus exclaimed, punctuating the sentence with a squeeze of Logan’s kneecap. “If you won’t laugh on your own, then I’ll make you.”

Well if Logan wasn’t flustered before, he most certainly was now. Remus stopped tickling his knees and Logan took the chance to catch his breath because he knew that Remus wasn’t done with him yet.

Remus carefully examined Logan trying to decide on where else to try tickling him. His sides and knees were certainly good spots but not the best spot clearly. Then Remus’s eyes fell on Logan’s feet which were still dressed in shoes and socks.

In all of the time Remus had spent spying on Logan he hadn’t really seen Logan take off his shoes much. Except when just before he went to bed.

Oh Remus was good.

Wasting no time Remus moved down and sat on Logan’s legs and began to untie the laces on Logan’s shoes, it didn’t take long for Logan to catch on to Remus' devious plan.

“No, no Remus! No, not there!” Logan tried pulling his legs out from Remus but with no success due to Remus’s weight being on top of him.

“Actually Lo lo you said you’d help me find your Hysterical Hacker and if you really want to help me then you’ll sit nice and still and let me experiment.” Remus’s voice had gone uncharacteristically flat as he talked to Logan and Logan found himself with no other options than just to sit there and wait.

Once Logan’s socks were off his feet Remus started Gently running his fingers down the arch of Logan’s foot and he was not expecting the reaction that he got.

“AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA *Snort* HAHAHAHA REHEHAHAHAH *Snort*”

Remus’s finger’s stopped and he looked back at Logan, who was bright red and now had a hand covering his mouth in embarrassment.

“Jesus f*cking christ Logan, did you just snort?” Remus asked in disbelief, were his ears playing tricks on him?

Logan looked away but nodded, Remus shocked expression turned into an ear splitting grin as he squealed to Logan. “Oh my f*ck that’s so adorkable!”

“No it’s not, it's embarrassing!” Logan argued, Remus's gears were now turning. Was this why Logan never laughed? Because he was embarrassed. Well wouldn’t do at all.

Remus grabbed Logan's foot again and began tickling the skin under his toes and that got Logan screaming.

“AAAHAHAHAHAHA *Snort* NHOHOHOHOHOHO *Snort* REHEHEHEHAHAHAMUHUHS.”

“Logan, you listen to me, and listen well!” Remus ordered to the laughing side beneath him. “Your laugh is amazing and you had better start laughing more often and if you don’t then I’ll tickle you until you pass out everyday, ok?”

“YEHEHEHEHAHAHAHSHSHSH OK JUHUHUHSTSTST STSTAHAHAP!”

Remus let go of Logan’s foot and got up off of him. Remus sat and watched his Boyfriend catch his breath and once he saw Logan lay limp on his bedroom floor he spoke to him.

“Hey, you alive?”

“Well no thanks to you.” Logan grumbled back to him.

“It was for science, my laughy Logie.” Remus insisted to Logan.

“Don’t call me that.” Logan though found himself giggling at the silly pet name.

“But it suits you so well.” Remus came down to Logan and gave him a kiss on the cheek which must have changed Logan’s mind because he didn’t argue back anymore.

“Well then I need to go update notes, I love you my laughy Logie.” Remus sunk down and rose back into his room to finish up his notes.

Hysterical Hackers

Emo widow — puns

Daddy — cat videos

Romano cheese — family friendly humor

Lies and dulls — other’s pain

Logie bear — tickling his sides, knees or feet (further research might be needed for my laughy Logie)

[nightcolorz]

For the ask game: ❤️💚💙

YAYY thank u sm for the ask! these questions r so fun. I’m going off of the book fandom btw

❤: Which character do you think is the most egregiously mischaracterized by the fandom?

Louis <3 I think this is an affect of how likable and overtly sympathetic he is in the amc show but I've seen people getting genuinely offended over Louis being described in fandom (and by Anne rice herself) as a manipulative cold hearted ass who uses his perceived vulnerability and gentleness to distract from the fact that he is just as cruel if not crueler then the other vampires. Like Louis does nottt have strong morals or high empathy lmao. Book Louis weaponizes his privilege like a white woman crying to self victimize into making the other vampires look worse them him 😭 . He refuses to kill humans for a while not bcus it hurts him to take life (he actually takes more pleasure in it then most), he refuses bcus he has catholic brain the way a christians who say "how do atheists have morals without god?" do, misunderstanding that most people actually care about other people and dont need an existential threat to encourage them not to hurt others.

His moral compass is self centered and based in up keeping the appearance of self restraint and monk style lack of enjoying himself, not empathy. If a vampire killed u would u feel better if u knew he cried over how much he got off on it then flaunted his suffering over how little he indulged so that everyone knew how piosis he was 😭.

He is way worse when it comes to how he treats his victims then Armand who intentionally seeks out victims who r asking to die or Lestat who tries the vigilante approach. Louis kills innocents and he thinks it makes him better cuz he only does it sometimes and he feels really really bad about himself afterwards. As akasha said (paraphrased) he's the most predatory of them all.

To specify I love book Louis SOOOO much I love how shitty he is that's why it makes me sad when people mischaracterize him as sincere and get gen mad when ppl characterize him how he is in canon (a lying selfish bitch bless his heart). Like ik amc Louis at this point in canon is unambiguously in the right but he isn't like an accurate reflection of how he is in the books 😭 it's not like amc did what anne rice was trying to do more successfully, they just nulled what anne rice was doing in favor of a more likable protagonist. Which is fine, but like, there's no crime in preferring evil to the core horrible asshole Louis of the books.

💚: What does everyone else get wrong about your favorite character?

I think the common fandom perception of Armand as the crazy unhinged "omg I can't believe he actually did that in the books??" sadistic maniac villain guy is funny but not really accurate. Armand explicitly not only tries to avoid violence but dislikes it and finds it hard to comprehend why someone would seek out violence and conflict.

The reason he is always doing fucked up shit isn't out of a lestat-esc desire to cause chaos, it's bcus his highly strung ptsd brain has him convinced that the world is a battle ground and he must always be defending himself and acting out in violence.

Since acting out in violence is a reaction hes been taught throughout his life to be standard and necessary, as violence is something so normalized to him he considers it more of a tedious chore then a last resort measure, he usually reacts to conflict in ways that are objectively extreme to anyone who isn't thinking from his perspective. In qotd he even asks Daniel why men choose to fight in wars, explaining that he doesn't understand the draw of violence (bcus he's not a man) and he can't comprehend the supposed thrill of it.

Then he says this in pl to Gregory

💙: Which character is not as hot as everyone else seems to think they are?

i was going to say Marius but I figure that's too obvious since everyone at this point knows I don't like Marius 😭 so here's an even hotter take,,,,, Lestat ‼️

Only to a degree, I think Lestat is hot and deserves the hype, but i also think he's hot in a different way then a chunk of the fandom does. Based on his book description he's kind of wonky looking, mouth too big for his face, vaguely unnerving shallow pale skin, starved 1700s peasant build but also kind of buff in the unhealthy "i dont eat regularly but I'm strong enough to carry a wolf for miles on my back" sense, weirdly small fucking feet. He def has creepy ass florescent blue doll eyes too. my point is I think when drooling over Lestat the fandom tends to forget this wonkiness in favor of blonde bombshell, Sam Reid chizzled jawline and abs, or conventionally beautiful anime twink, when they should be appreciating lestat in all his weird as shit glory.

[angelofthepage]

Memory Joey - What is your source?

Hi I did not get my full eight hours of sleep, and I am chomping at the bit with a new thought, so prepare for a slightly unhinged Kat theory about Joey.

Last night I was chatting with my partner in crime Beth about a number of Bendy things, but one of my many takeaways from that conversation was a new angle of looking at Memory Joey. So, recently I shared that I was frustrated with the narrative shift of Henry and Allison being ink copies, because it feels like it cheapens the original BATIM and doesn't do anything to serve the Joey Drew Redemption Arc (tm) narrative. We as the player know the man has a body count. Even if you take these two characters out of the mix, he's still responsible for the deaths of multiple other characters, mostly in the books, but like, come on, the whole "I own thousands of them" comment about souls in BATIM? The coffins with secret names on them? Joey you ain't slick. We spent too long establishing that Joey used his employees for their souls across MULTIPLE MEDIUMS to suddenly throw all of that out the window, and I don't entirely buy the idea that these two aren't the real deal. Granted, it still leaves us with questions about how the ink demon works given, there was also time dedicated to establishing that he was imperfect because he's soulless, but that's for another day.

But then, last night we talked about how none of these characters know Audrey is the daughter of Drew. And if they did know that, would their reactions be different? Would they still try to help her? I'm not sure. But it got me thinking about how there's a lot of things we the player know/believe that the characters don't. And that's when it hit me.

Memory Joey's story wasn't for us. It was for Audrey.

Now, that sounds obvious, like no duh, he's talking to Audrey for the whole scene, of course it's for her. Memory Joey doesn't know we as the players exist, he's got nothing to prove to us. But hear me out: that sequence wasn't meant to give us as players new information or prove he's a changed man, we weren't the ones who were supposed to believe in it. Audrey was. He has EVERYTHING to prove to Audrey. That's the daughter of the man he came from, his precious little girl, the first time he made something with the ink machine out of love, and she doesn't even remember that he's her father. Joey Drew, throughout his lifetime, cared a lot about how people saw him. Having shoes and a suit that didn't make him look poor, appearing financially stable to investors, the nasty things he had to say when he thought he wasn't being recorded, acting like he had control when everything he knew was falling apart, Joey was always trying to keep up appearances. And while I'll believe that he can mostly let go of that with time and growth, I don't think he could deal with Audrey, his daughter, seeing him as the bad guy. Especially when she doesn't remember Joey? Trying to make a good impression, sharing that yes, he did bad things, but he wasn't all bad? That he changed? That's covering Joey's ass something fierce.

Audrey isn't aware of Joey's body count. She doesn't know what happened to his employees. How Sammy became a cultist, how Susie was mistreated and manipulated to be desperate to be Alice. The entire story of Buddy Lewek and Norman Polk. She knows NONE of it! She doesn't know what he did. She doesn't know there were so many teenagers, just a little younger than her, that DIED because of his machine. And until you get the note about the kids that came before her, she has no idea she's not the first.

I often give Memory Joey a pass, he doesn't strike me as someone who would want to lie, especially to Audrey since he clearly cares about her. He delivers his slideshow presentation so earnestly, it feels like he truly believes this is what's true. But then I'm left questioning, what is his source? Why does he believe that they're clones? But maybe...maybe he is lying on purpose. I think it could be an equal opportunity for both. Joey was a liar in life, he lied about so many things (which is frustrating when he's the one giving us most of the information we look to to figure out how the heck ink works, Gent can you please give us some notes to cross reference?). Why wouldn't he lie to appear better to his own daughter? Memory Joey making that distinction for himself, that he himself cares for how Audrey sees him and Joey, would be a really valuable detail for his character, but him not knowing and believing all the information that someone like Joey left behind for him (since I'm assuming that's where his understanding of the cycle comes from) would also be interesting for his characterization.

But here's the kicker: by introducing the idea that Henry and Allison are not truly their human counterparts, if that turns out to be untrue, you've made a grave mistake Memory Joey. Audrey doesn't know any of these people were human before they became ink. I mean maybe she can deduce that other humans are in here given Allison's whole "I remember my first day" speech, but then Memory Joey throwing this at her, Allison is a creation rather than someone who was once alive? Who's to say she'd think twice about it? Wilson treats everyone like they're just ink and not worth caring for after all. But if she finds out about the sacrifices? That many of these ink creatures were once human? Oh Broseph my dude, you are gonna have a lot to answer for, more ways in which her trust in you will be utterly broken. That is a very messy, delicate balance. I kind of want to see that. I want to see him have his world view turned on its head, learning that he was wrong about Henry, and have him genuinely not know that he was fed bad information. Let him process that, let him struggle, and let Audrey grapple with the truth too.

Yeah, I don't necessarily think Henry and Allison are clones. Inhuman, yes, but clones? I think we need more than Memory Joey's word to know that for sure. So I ask again, sir, what is your source?

[artemisrisen]

chapter 51 musings/impressions

This chapter caused every synapse in my brain to fire off like cannonballs during a battle at high sea. This isn’t anything coherent, just word vomit as I process everything that’s happened. I may go back and edit as I think of more things or decide how to phrase other things better. cut for massive spoilers below. 

By the way, this is fantastic for non-Japanese reading fans because there is barely any dialogue. Just mad, bad, and rad touching, baby

-          The color pages are so ominous. Let’s get this pissed-off parade going

-          I don’t like Doumeki shoving Yashiro like that. With that being said, Yashiro SHOT DOUMEKI IN BOTH OF HIS LEGS and LEFT HIM IN AN ABANDONED WAREHOUSE. Not to mention Yashiro gets him back tenfold (twenty-fold?) in this very same chapter. So I can probably get over it.

-          Doumeki, who hasn’t moved a facial muscle in days, yells at a resisting Yashiro to stop acting like that when they’ve already done it; his expression is nothing like the cold, remote Yakuza he’s role-played as, but pure-cut Doumeki from pre-Sakura days, pre-hospital days: it’s not just anger at all, but desperation.

-          And Yashiro sees it: he realizes Doumeki is truly angry –the angriest he’s ever seen him, he thinks— and the switch is flipped. Doumeki’s indifference has eaten at him throughout the time-skip chapters; no matter how he prods or ingratiates himself, Doumeki seemed to be as unmoved as a mountain. I know there were even readers who questioned if Doumeki still loved Yashiro (which is, you know, absurd.) But now—now Doumeki is furious and it shows all over his face and his actions - and it’s because of Yashiro. Doumeki, who was unreachable, is suddenly right here. You can see Yashiro visibly relax into the ministrations; he pets Doumeki’s hair and even begins to pull the other man’s jacket off, which is shockingly active for him as a participant in sex.

-          Of course, this causes Doumeki to freeze in his angry lovemaking. Because he seems to know that Yashiro will be Pretty Unhappy with the back tattoo – the bridge that cannot be uncrossed, the hope of any reintegration to normal society extinguished. But how upset was he anticipating? Maybe he expected some disgust, or being called stupid, or for Yashiro to roll away and close himself off.  

-          I think it’s safe to say he didn’t expect Yashiro to have a genuine meltdown and proceed to beat the shit out of him with his bare hands. Yashiro’s eyes resemble the same wide, unhinged look when he tried to kill Hirata with a rock –but Doumeki was unconscious then. He’s never seen Yashiro out of control, especially with his emotions. In their first conversation, Doumeki relays that Yashiro “smiles even when he’s mad”, so he knew off the bat that Yashiro hides himself. He’s seen Yashiro kick Nanahara to injury, but there was a distance in that act, like a parent calmly disciplining a child. This rage feels like the child himself is screaming and pounding on the ground to exhaustion.

-          And Doumeki can see it. He lets Yashiro just pummel him right in the face. I think, in this world they’re in plagued with violence, this is as damning as a love confession. If Doumeki’s reaction is anything to go by, which is that after Yashiro exhausts himself, Doumeki cups his cheek and then kisses him full on the mouth.

-          Their pose near parallel to their first kiss, with Doumeki kissing from above with Yashiro’s eyes still wide open in shock.

-          But this time, instead of pushing away, Yashiro meets Doumeki fully: their kissing becomes heated, and it builds until Yashiro is all but sitting in Doumeki’s lap. There’s a frame of a single line of spit connecting their lips and it’s beautiful and filthy and a precursor to the feral sex that’s about to happen.

-          Naturally it ends here, because sensei wants us frothing at the mouth and ripping the upholstery apart for the next chapter as always.

- so what’s next? I think the sex is an absolute given; Doumeki’s hand is already dipping into the back of Yashiro’s pants (and Yashiro jolts / shivers in response) on the last page, so unless Kamiya comes barging in - well, actually, even if he does come barging in, Doumeki is going to use his entire Yakuza Superior Authority and make him leave, so. I think 52 is going to be raunchy as hell, and also sad, and also intense, because that’s saezuru.

- I mean, they’re gonna break the bed, right? that flimsy-ass frame that only holds Doumeki and not a single pound more? they might have better luck on the floor, but somehow I feel like both want to deliberately fuck that poor mattress into the below neighbor’s living room.

- And what happens from here? There’s still an investigation happening; the bad guys are still out there, targeting Doumeki. Yashiro now has to contend with the idea that Doumeki is fully “in”. Will he rejoin the Yakuza despite finally getting one foot out the door? It’s really hard to say. Personally I think they should just move abroad to Hawaii or somewhere and live peacefully and anonymously on Yashiro’s hoards of cash he’s accumulated in the last 4 years.

[incarnadinedreams]

What do you like about jc?

Oh my goodness what don't I love about him!

Well, first and most importantly, he has a purple lightning whip.

Secondly, you know how the elements of a tasty dish are salt, fat, acid, heat? Well he's salty, he's acidic, he's a spicy Yunmeng boy, and some sources of mixed repute claim he's got a nice fat ass. All the elements for a delicious snack are right there!!! He has the range, the depth, the complexity!

Jokes aside, a lot of it really is just based on vibes. I just... liked him pretty much immediately. My heart was won at "I'm his uncle. Any last words?" and it only got better from there. He's got most of my favorite lines in the book - whether funny or completely heart-wrenching, both directly in his dialog or about him. His sarcastic comments are always hilarious, and he's often enough actually a voice of reason and responsibility (promptly ignored). The vast majority of the time when he's not in some absurdly extreme and traumatic situation he's being pretty normal and seems perfectly likeable to me.

I enjoy that from the start he's mostly pretty practical. One of the first times we see him, he desperately wants to smack Lan Wangji but he's run the cost-benefit analysis in his mind and it's not worth it, so (grumpily) he does not. Some people point out his 'definitely don't start a petty fight unless you know you can win' reasoning as some sort of point of cowardice, but my reaction to that scene was thank god, finally someone in a fantasy novel has some common fucking sense!

Except, of course, on one very specific topic: Wei Wuxian. And then there's like a 50/50 chance all that consideration goes out the window instantly. A little pinch of unhinged obsession adds so much extra flavor! With the amount of overtime he's pulling in sect conferences he deserves a little derangement from time to time, as a treat. And that intensity goes both ways.

That fervent certainty that Wei Wuxian would be back some day, that not even death could hold him - a conviction bordering on madness, except in the end he was right? Hot.

On the other end, he's willing to sacrifice himself for Wei Wuxian and other people who loves over and over and over again throughout the story (even if he's mad about it), until he can't do that without throwing other people he's responsible for under the bus.

To the point that when we get to the big reveal after Guanyin Temple about how he was captured by the Wens... once the shock fades, you step back and think 'wait, why was that even a surprise to me at all?' The guy just took a sword through the chest for Wei Wuxian like an hour earlier (even if it was unnecessary and therefore mostly embarrassing), and was about to run back into that cave at the Second Siege with no spiritual power and a sword he couldn't even lift three days before that, and yet we're surprised he gave himself up back then?

And of course, the same goes for his nephew and I just love them so much. He doesn't hesitate for a moment to offer himself as a hostage instead of Jin Ling at the temple. He may sometimes struggle to express his love in a way that's more palatable than the prickly sharp thing it can sometimes be, but it's undeniably there. When Jin Ling is crying after the Second Siege, it's Jiang Cheng he goes to without hesitation - and that "Who did this to you?!" line, the way he doesn't hesitate to pull him away somewhere private and stick by his side.

Even things that are meant to cast him in a bad light, like his 400 spirit nets fiasco, show him also anxiously helicopter-uncling his way through baby's first "solo" night hunt, complete with undercover agents just in case, is proof that he at least cares very deeply. I think if you look beyond the surface, it's also pretty obvious why he'd spare no expense and use any method to give his bullied nephew the best debut night hunt possible in a society where talent and prestige are incredibly important to his future ability to consolidate power as the Jin heir. He wants to shield him from the same insecurities and pain he felt, especially where being overshadowed was used against him in ways that had specific negative impacts on his ability to protect people he cared about.

Another of the reasons I love him so much is because his grief is so intense that it's palpable. Those scenes post-fall of Lotus Pier where he's oscillating between numbed shock and fury, just... feel so real, and relatable, and resonate in way that's just horribly accurate. It's like his grief jumps off the page, you can feel the hurricane of horror and loss crashing into him. The scene at Nightless City, that moment where he says "Didn't you say that you could control it, that it would be fine?", where the last of his faith in Wei Wuxian shatters and the fracture is complete, like two halves of a whole have finally snapped apart and there's nothing left... I just love the intensity and desperation.

But even more, he keeps going after. He's stubbornly alive, despite it all, and I don't think he gets nearly enough credit for the fact that he's actually able to handle things pretty well, considering the situations involved. He has a breakdown about it and then he picks himself up and gets back to work. He's remarkably resilient, in ways that aren't necessarily flashy or obvious at first. Too much is made out of the ways he's broken or bitter when for the most part he's actually remarkably functional in the face of horrible traumas!

I have been trying very hard not to just spam my favorite quotes in here but this is really my favoritest favorite (from chapter 61) because it just sums him up so beautifully:

... the most laughable one was the YunmengJiang Sect, the people of which either had been killed or had scattered, leaving only Jiang Cheng, who was younger than even Lan XiChen and was still a child born yesterday, who had nobody in his hands but still dared call himself sect leader, holding up the banner of rebellion as he recruited new disciples.

Because he does the hard work, day in and day out. The boring, tedious, constant work - the endless late nights dealing with the constant problems. But he does it, and he mostly accomplishes what he sets out to do.

It's so sad that all the things he does very well get overshadowed by his insecurities, because in the end, hasn't he done incredible things? Hasn't he survived? Hasn't he gone from the youngest sect leader with nothing and nobody that Wen Ruohan could only laugh at, to "No matter which clan you choose to offend, you shouldn't offend the Jiang clan, and no matter which person you choose to offend, you shouldn't offend Jiang Cheng"?

He might be a little scarred, but isn't he succeeding all the same?

(He should probably hire a PR firm to handle the rumors his resting bitch face causes though.)

[julietsbb]

julie <3 i am here to give your last three updates love. once again, vampire phuwin au is my salvation. in the nights you update, i live.

oki, so. i waited to see how their conflict concludes before i sent you an ask. (i can't communicate properly on twt because that account has a lot of history and i'd rather not use it much. contemplating making one from scratch so i can quote you my madness for every update properly)

but i also enjoy sending you unhinged asks here, ngl.

okay, back to what's important. the conflict was so nice to see. because, you know, i felt throughout the story that there's this (understandable) carefulness in phuwin. even when he would let go for a few seconds or during feeding, his manner of speech and his actions still express it so loudly. mindfulness for pond to be alright, for everything to be consensual and for phuwin to not /slip/, almost.

like i said, very understandable. he's battling with understanding how much he enjoys certain (bloody, you could say) aspects of this deal they have, and not ruining things with pond. because he cares so much for pond, right? he wants him to be happy, always. pond comes first before everything for phuwin, it feels. even feeding. (this is my dedulu ass just rambling to you my understanding of your writing, some interpretations. i just feel like there's a lot expressed in your narration.)

point is: to see pond go through that tumult of thinking that phuwin found it disgusting - by proxy found /him/ disgusting for being so into it. having a breakdown; actually, breaking down. and then transition into something almost intolerant of phuwin's carefulness, was absolutely wonderful.

like, let me explain a bit more. the way you write pond: he's so sweet, so pliant under phuwin's needs, his rules in their deal. he's so understanding and so quick to comply to what phuwin thinks is best.

that's what i got from him. so to see him be stern, to see him say "can you stop assuming how i feel?" to see him put his foot down in the face of phuwin's overthinking and fears was glorious. you see another side to him. it's clear that their morning talk was horrible for him (for both of them, but i talked about phuwin a little bit before, so I'm focusing on pond now) and he doesn't want a repeat of it, wants to be as clear as possible. wants phuwin to get it, to maybe even /let go./

and then comes phuwin's turn to listen and comply and accept pond's requests and JUST *GRIPS HAIR* their communication is 1000000000/10. Even if they go through it, suffer a bit, they succeed in making things alright in the best way.

also, side note. phuwin thinking 'it's always nice' about pond being shirtless was just sjfhsfhs the obvious gay thoughts are amazing. he's so whipped he thinks it's all normal. thinking your friend's chest is nice is normal homie behavior, you're right phuwin.

overall awesomeness. all three updates had me as entranced as ever. the healing kisses in the elevator had me gagged. it's interesting how you can still spot so vividly phuwin's apprehensiveness/careful nature in it.

can't wait to see how they develop after these talks they had. how the feeding will go. once again, thank you for writing this wonderful au and thank you for letting me be delulu about your ppw au.

i am very tired today because i woke at 4am for no goddamn reason so this ask made me emotional T_T <3

I love when people qrt their reactions to the updates on the megathread of doom (don't want to think about how mant tweets 102 google docs pages are.....) BUT I also really really fucking love and adore your asks so DO WHATEVER YOU WANT it's a win/win for me!!

AAAHHHH i love your take and how you view phuwin so much because like that was his starting point like POND IS WILLING TO GIVE ME THIS??!?!!?!?!?! must treasure must be worthy wow wtf and now i'm discovering there's not only annoying parts to this major part of my identity? this aspect of myself and my life is something i can enjoy??? wow pond is magic. basically. so he's just so pathetically grateful but also so aware of, like, HOW TO BE WORTHY OF IT, basically. silk gloves for pond. i'm so glad that's coming through <3

which just makes him dealing with his sudden suppressed urge to hurt rearing its "ugly" head that much harder, like, he's so certain about this but suddenly his body and his yearning is attempting to tell him the opposite? like it's so unthinkable it's how he could be in denial about it for so long, which is a big part of what ends up hurting pond.

I am so fucking glad pond's transition in this conflict worked for you because they've both developed so much re: each other already in this that my brain is like "what is even in character anymore?" and it's not like we have any points of reference to pond standing up to phuwin in any way, but like, i knew pond having that shift was NECESSARY for them and their relationship to work, like it felt right. pond is a sweetheart and pond accommodates, but i also don't feel like he's someone who would just let others walk all over him after they've hurt him. thankfully, we've seen stand up to the stalkers now for instance. my point being: i was writing it and it felt right as i was doing so and it was needed to push them to a better place, but if i asked myself 'how would pond handle this' my answer would be '???' but one thing we DO know is how much phuwin values and appreciates honesty and pond knows that too, so one thing I could see pond do is cling to that, phuwin begged him to speak on the bathroom floor and pond knows phuwin values truth and directness, so i could see him cling to that aspect as a way forward.

'can you stop assuming how i feel' came to me in the middle of doing something else, i was probably biking to work or something, so i had to open my note doc on my phone to jut it down and not forget, because i felt it was the key cause of their miscommunication, because phuwin was so set in his conviction of how he was supposed to threat pond with this that he... forgot to ask pond about it lol so as i was writing that scene it was very "okay so how do i work their conversation from where they are to pond interrupting with that without it seeming forced" 😂

ye i made a point of phuwin folding completely to pond from that point on and show that like.... if phuwin CONSULTS POND they can actually find compromises that work better for both of them together. i also needed phuwin to see that. like, pw, you CAN do things differently than you thought you were supposed to and they WORK. it was important for me to showcase them trying to maneuver that new ground, of being in it together.

"he's so whipped he thinks it's all normal." PRECISELY yes thank you - as i said to alan on twitter, he goes from 'passively easy-to-ignore into dudes' to 'actually actively into one particular dude because suddenly their bond and intimacy have rapidly tightened and he's seen him in a completely new light so everything is the same but different'

oh the healing lift kisses were tough for me to write because they were both so conflicted about them. both knew it had to be done but there was no chance to communicate/get on the same page about it first. but also the act itself is something they are kinda both enjoying despite themselves? like neither of them wants to be into it at that moment but it's a) closeness after their fallout, which they both crave and b) an act they're so used to enjoying, their bodies are hardwired to respond somehow to it, even if just a tiny bit. so trying to somehow get the balance of 'this is kinda sexy but also really not, because we don't want it to be, neither of us do, but it's also YOU and CLOSE and THIS THING WE BOTH LIKE but also our interpersonal relationship is still relatively rocky at this point, like, you're on my neck and it feels nice and i both do and very much do not want it for multiple reasons also i'm still kinda pissed at you. and then only from pw pov and i had to convey pond's side entirely through the reactions phuwin were privy toobecause i couldn't even describe pond's face because pw's face was in his neck skdhskflhsl no idea if i succeeded but i'm glad you mentioned it!!

there's no 'letting' about it pls always delulu about my ppw au i think at this point i might just turn to dust without it T_T

[saintsenara]

For the ask game: I’ll go for 1, 19, and 29 for Tom/Harry. And, if you’d like, 30 for a ship of your choice! 😊

(P.S. I just saw your post about the Myrtle rom-com! I am HYPED).

thank you so much for the ask, @spacecadette - and for reminding me to tentatively go back to ao3 and launch myrtle's hot girl era to the world.

the answer [unhinged and deranged] to question 30 is here and the questions for the ask game are here

1. what are their love languages?

answered here, and i stand by it. there's no interest from these two in words of affirmation or spending quality time together, and their interest in physical touch - the succour of a generation of smut writers - is mostly because who wouldn't want to be constantly running their hands over someone who has/had a bit of your soul living in them.

lord voldemort's love language is gift-giving, harry's is acts of service. they make it work.

19. how do they silently/subtly express their love for each other?

answered from voldemort's perspective, although of course he denies it indicates any affection for harry, here.

and as for harry? well, as ron says in canon [tomarry shipper, we all knew it]: you really understand him.

harry is probably the only person in the entire story who can completely appreciate just how grim voldemort's childhood was, and who can understand how that might have influenced the choices he made throughout his life. it's this that drives him, even in the middle of war, to beg voldemort to try to feel remorse; it's this which makes him want to help the soul-piece at king's cross; it's this which causes his obvious - and, to other characters, very confusing - empathy for the teenage tom riddle, who is disappointed to find his uncle living in a shack and furious when hepzibah smith insults his mother.

and that understanding - especially for someone who is, underneath the mask of cold brutality, just a feral boy who wishes to be seen and known - is like the tides against a cliff.

harry offers up a little space for voldemort to meditate on the fact that being an orphan is like being a palimpsest, constantly searching for traces of your ancestors within yourself; gets into days-long arguments about whether mrs cole or petunia was worse; "accidentally" leaves bob ogden's memory out, allowing voldemort to see his mother for the first time; recognises that hating your mother for dying and your father for abandoning you is a pretty natural reaction for a child to have, and dumbledore needed to tighten up; tells voldemort he'd have been a terrible teacher, because you can't let basilisks loose in schools and expect that not to affect a hiring committee; deals with a week of screaming when he tells voldemort about regulus; points out that gringotts is a bank and you can just ask for an account there; is game for starting new traditions for high-days and holidays, since neither of them ever had any as children [harry pretends the fireworks on nye are for voldemort, voldemort genuinely believes it]; and - and this is the one voldemort simply can't deal with and pretends never happens - forgives him.

because he's harry potter, damn it, and he gets to decide if that prophecy actually means anything.

he also allows voldemort to do all their interior design, even if that means living in a house with so much gold in it it's basically the interior of a byzantine cathedral. whatever keeps him out of trouble.

29. what is something they can never agree on? how do they meet in the middle?

ethics. obviously.

criminal justice. politics. the economy. whether hell is real. wandlore. dumbledore. if harry killing voldemort balances out voldemort killing harry's parents. werewolf rights. muggle technology. house elves. whether hermione is annoying. spoiler ettiquette. dinner. where to go on holiday. if harry looks good in his weasley jumper. if albus severus is a worse name for a child than delphini. whether hagrid should have been expelled. whether dogs are better than cats. what they're doing that weekend.

the list truly is endless...

they meet in the middle quite literally when they start hexing each other, activate the old wand connection, and are knocked out by the force of the magic when the golden bead reaches the middle of the spell. they wake up and decide to agree to disagree. they make it, at most, a day before it happens again.

ron and hermione are losing their minds.

[dollsque]

Hi hi!

I read your fanfics and I’m in love!!

And when I realised that your requests are open?!! I was just jumping because I knew I had to request something

Could you please write Hobie brown x fem!guitarist!reader??

So basicalllyyy

Hobie is chilling in a pub just enjoying his time and bla bla, when a band starts to play on the stage

Usually, he wouldn’t mind, but that night??

He noticed that his band mates would look at the stage quite often, so he decided to look as well. And when he saw reader, just playing like it was breathing for her, he lost it!!!

He was just so shocked that R could make guitar look so easy, yet make it sound so majestic

Hobies band mates would snicker and laugh at his reaction

Then, after the performance, R decided to go and order a drink or smt. So she just casually goes over to the bar. Nothing special, right? WRONG!! Hobie is LOST! He can’t look away, he thinks that everything R does is just captivating.

And yeahhh

They have a conversation and it’s just super cute (maybe while R waits for her drink, the bartender tries to flirt with her and Hobie gets jealous?? You can leave that part out if you want to;) )

Yeahh

(Hobie is just a tongue-tied mess but R thinks it’s adorable and she kinda has Hobies’ normal attitude)

Yup!! Thank you in advance!!

Take care and please hydrate!! (I have a big issue with that lol)

-🎀 (can I claim this ribbon? So you just know that it’s me in the future)

So yeah!! Thank you a lot!!

💜 ➷ ₊• ☆ ˚˳ — 𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐓𝐄𝐃 — ₊• ☆ ˚˳

𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐊 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆!! sorry for taking so long! school is starting soon and i’ve been busy anxiously watching as the first day gets closer and making the most of the last couple weeks i have left!and you may claim the ribbon! i named the bandmates to make things easier if you don’t mind <3 thank you 🎀 anon!

➷ ₊• ☆ ˚˳ — 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2k

➷ ₊• ☆ ˚˳ — 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: hobie brown x !fem!guitarist!reader (fluff) ☆

➷ ₊• ☆ ˚˳ — 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: the fanart is by @/aspen.aspid! i just added the filter, lol. you can find her carrd in her tiktok bio. please check it out <3 will involve drinking and cursing (obviously, but y’know), no description of y/n, i’m not familiar with drinks so i will not be specifying what reader or hobie and his bandmates get LMAO, i gave the bandmates names from the comics.

➷ ₊• ☆ ˚˳ — 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 <𝟑

➷ ₊• ☆ ˚˳ — HOBIE AND HIS BANDMATES enter the pub and the music is roaring throughout the place, the drums vibrating through their chest as they walk. There is purple and blue lighting, instantly setting the mood, there are large speakers, and the vibe is overall really cool so far.

This is the first time they’ve come to this bar. They were recommended this bar by a friend and they wanted to check it out. Sitting at the bar, they see a large display of a variety of drinks displayed, there is a menu for bar snacks, sandwiches, and desserts.

They like it so far and are chatting it up, talking about their upcoming songs, their instruments, how they’ve been doing, when next practices, and random, unhinged conversations that they don’t even know the cause of. They DO know, however, that it started with Hobie saying some wild shit.

Then, when they got the stuff they ordered, which were drinks and some sandwiches, the current topic came to a halt and they started looking back before continuing the conversation, then back again, and back to the conversation. Hobie hadn’t been paying much attention to the band, but now he was curious about what got them to keep the conversation going on and off. Looking behind him, he finally understands what they’re so captivated with.

How could they all not be captivated?

You are currently shredding the guitar like there’s no tomorrow, keeping up with the drums in perfect sync and accentuating the singer’s powerful vocals and the bassist’s support. To them, you are the highlight of the song that you and your band are currently playing.

The smoke acting like a stage effect covers some parts of you for a few seconds, but when the smoke finally parts fully to reveal your entire self, he finds himself more than captivated. The way your fingers dance at an incredible speed on the strings to switch notes and the way the guitar pick so confidently strummed the guitar, he finds himself questioning how the guitar pick is still in your hand. However, from guitarist to guitarist, he knows that you have an iron grip on that pick. He just can’t stop staring at you.

Your hair, your eyes, your clothes, just…everything.

“Holy shit, mate, she’s got you mesmerized doesn’t she?” One of his bandmates, Karl smirks, nudging him with his elbow as the others snicker next to him.

“Can’t take his eyes off her,” Riri snickers, taking a sip of her drink.

“Oh, come out of it. You guys are looking at her too!” Hobie points out in defense, finally looking away, though reluctantly.

“We stopped looking a while ago, mate. It’s been three minutes since we last looked. You were staring at her for the last minute of the last song and for two minutes of the current song that’s playin’.” Robbie told him. He gave him a playful flick on the side of his head, causing Hobie to scowl at him. “I think you’re the one that needs to come off it the most. You’re fucking LOST in her dude.”

“How long you guys think she’s been playing the guitar?” Mattea questioned, shifting the teasing off Hobie…for now.

“Hell, long enough to do all that. And here I thought there was no one better than me,” Hobie scoffed in awe.

“You thought wrong even BEFORE we saw her,” Robbie quipped, earning a loud laugh from Mattea and causing Riri to snicker as she tried drinking more of her drink, making it bubble.

“Oh, fuck off, you asshole.” Hobie scoffed, but there was a small smirk on his face. And just like that, they’re back to teasing poor (literally) Hobie.

He already finds himself lost in her again, but he’s interrupted much earlier this time. He doesn’t even know what the other members look like. Don’t get him wrong, your bandmates are just as incredible and powerful as you, but they are goddamn.

“Hey, Lover Boy, what are you gonna say when she comes over here for a drink?” Mattea asked.

“What?” Hobie questions a little too quickly. “I highly doubt she’ll come over for a drink. By the time they’re all done playing, the pub will be closed.”

“It just turned 8 PM, Hobs. I don’t think they’ll be playing for the next three hours.”

As if on cue: “THANK YOU ALL FOR LISTENING US PLAY OUR NEW SONGS!” Your band member proudly and gratefully yelled into the microphone, causing everyone in the pub to cheer. “We play here regularly, and ever since we first started, you guys have always been very supportive, so thank you. Have a great night!”

Regularly? Shit, this might be Hobie’s new regular pub, and no, his bandmates don’t get a say in it.

Wait.

“Hey, Lover Boy, what are you gonna say when she comes over here for a drink?” That question Mattea asked earlier was now invading his brain. He immediately starts thinking of things to say, but he suddenly feels his senses go off, and it’s NOT from danger.

He turns around to face where you’re supposedly standing nervously. “Oh, Hello,” he greeted politely, trying to keep a straight smile on. You were there in all your greatness, your electric guitar slug over your shoulder. Holy shit, Robbie’s right. He’s so fucking lost in you.

“Hi! Is anyone sitting next to you?”

Nothing.

“Hello?” You called out as his bandmates discreetly snickered.

“Oh, no, nobody’s sitting there. Shit, sorry,” he apologized, twirling his glass in a more fiddling matter.

You giggle at him and sit down on the stool next to him, not oblivious to his obvious nervousness and interest in you.

Hobie glanced back at his bandmates, and they only looked back with a slight smirk before conversing within themselves, leaving Hobie out of it.

Now he has to talk to you if he doesn’t want to look like some lonely loser. They’re smart for that; he can’t lie.

“So, you were very good up there. You play the electric guitar like there’s no fucking tomorrow. I like that. How long have you been playing? Many years, I reckon?” He asked, putting his glass down and resting his head in his hand.

You mirror his position. “Oh yeah, a hell ton of fucking years went to that, but thanks.” You smirked proudly. “How ‘bout you? You playin’ tonight?”

“Me? Oh, no. I just like to take it with me everywhere. It really adds to my outfit, y’know?” He answered with a smile, though it looked absolutely lovesick. “My friends over there, we uh, play here and there at a different pub not too far from here.”

“Really? I might have to check it out then. Maybe just for you,” you answered with that captivating smile Hobie loves so much.

He’s so lost. He cleared his throat. “I can’t wait to see you there and I can show you my playing, and stuff. My band’s great too, y’know, but uh—”

“I’m sure they are, but I’m still going there to hear you play if I won’t make you nervous and mess you up.”

Damn, she’s good at this. Hobie laughs and turns to drink a bit from his glass in a pathetic way to hide his face and that lovesick smile he had on his face. So damn lovesick. He doesn’t even know your name yet. Hell, he’s barely seen you for an hour. But damn it if an hour isn’t enough to fall in love with you.

“Hey, pretty girl,” the bartender greeted you with a wink, causing Hobie’s lovesick face to transition into a judgemental look. Pretty girl? “Anything I can get you today?”

“Can I get that drink over there and the ground beef sub?” You asked, pointing to that specific drink you want.

“Of course, anything for you. Hey, seriously, I meant it when I called you pretty,” the bartender smiled as he started making her sub.

“Yeah, she’s bloody gorgeous,” Hobie agreed, mainly out of spite. He still agreed, though. You were bloody gorgeous. “The most gorgeous girl here.”

That gave you butterflies. It’s like he flipped a switch; as if that small nickname the bartender gave you immediately caused him to go into defense mode.

Jealousy mode.

“Why thank you, you guys, but I like it coming from him more.” You smirk at the bartender, nodding your head towards Hobie, who now switches back to his initial consciousness. “I’m with him tonight.”

“Maybe you should make that more…nights? If you want to of course, but, y’know, just tonight? Really? I mean, are you sure you don’t want more? I mean, I would want to make it more than just tonight.”

He’s so adorable. Awkward too, but that just makes him more adorable. The bartender sighs disappointedly but raises his hands in both acceptance of defeat and a little bit of respect.

“We’ll definitely make it so it’s not just for tonight. You should come here tomorrow with your band. I’ll be looking forward to you,” you wink slyly.

“Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, definitely. We’ll be here. Right, um, what’s your name? Mine’s Hobie. Hobie Brown,” he greeted, awkwardly holding a hand out for you to shake.

You giggled at the gesture and shook his hand. “Y/N, nice to meet you. And you have a cute name? I like that.”

“Oh! Thank you! You have a very nice name too. I’ll remember it for when I come to see you tomorrow.” He smiled. Oh, if only she knew that his name was actually Hobart.

Thanks, Mom. He almost rolls his eyes at the thought. He can already hear his bandmates snickering even more than before, and he has half a mind to tell them to shut the fuck up.

“So, if we’re gonna be hanging out more than just tonight, we should have each other’s number, yeah? I’ll even tell you the next time our band plays at the other pub. Address and everything, of course. Maybe a backstage pass included for a little private meet and greet where we can really get to know each other,” Hobie smirked. The smoothest thing he’s said all night. There’s his confidence coming back. Slowly, but surely.

Now that you didn’t expect. You let out a chuckle and take a sip of your drink. “What happened to the adorable, tongue-tied boy I was just talking to?”

“We all gotta start somewhere,” he smirked, now drinking the rest of his drink that was left in his glass. “So, tomorrow?”

“Leaving so soon?”

“You want me to stay?”

“I need you to stay. Who else will keep me company?”

“Shit, we still got two hours and fifty minutes,” he smirked.

“Hm. Still need that number though,” you teased, poking his shoulder playfully. You internally squeal when he starts writing down his number on a small piece of paper. Hobie internally celebrates as he writes his number.

He slides the paper towards you, and you gladly pocket it.

“And yes, tomorrow. It’s a date,” you smile. Your heart flutters from the contact your knees make from facing each other on the stools. He doesn’t pull his leg away, and neither do you. You two like it that way.

It’s only the beginning of your night.

➷ ₊• ☆ ˚˳ — “WHAT I WOULD GIVE for someone to look at me the way Hobie looks at that girl.”

Riri sighs, stirring her drink with her straw as she glances at the two of them.

“Right? The fucker’s in love. Hell, he looks ready to propose right there and there.” Karl scoffed lightheartedly.

“Woah, slow down there. They’ve barely been talking for ten minutes,” Robbie snickered.

“Enough with the snickering!” They heard from their electric guitarist. It seemed as if you had gone to use the bathroom because your bandmates were still there. They didn’t seem oblivious to the fact that she was talking to Hobie, either.

“Our bad, our bad,” Matteas apologized. “…backstage pass, huh?”

“Shut up!” He yelled, slapping her with one of the pub’s newspapers while it was still rolled up. His bandmates all just snickered more.

What a pain in the ass. Yet, he couldn't help but smile proudly at himself.

© 2024 dollsque - all rights reserved; do not copy my works, repost my content, edit my works, or translate my works on tumblr or anywhere else. it is strictly forbidden. oh, and no AI shit with my works, please.

[faramirsonofgondor]

You're right about samjamie and you should say it!!! People ignore how cute their dynamic is, and the fact that they are constantly hugging/leaning on each other. Sam was pivotal in Jamie's growth and Jamie was key to making Sam a more assertive leader (in nice and not so nice ways). The material is RIGHT THERE and everyone ignores it!

yes! i think one of the most important aspects of their relationship is the fact that they CHOOSE to be close to each other, to support each other, and to love one another. in s1 jamie was a major bully to sam and hurt his confidence, and when jamie came back in s2 it would’ve been so easy for sam to write jamie off as a lost cause and move on. but he gave jamie the opportunity to prove himself, and jamie came through and supported him, and further acknowledged that sam was a good person who did a good thing despite the fact that they lost their match. now, from there it would also be easy for sam & jamie to remain distance from one another while still be cordial/friendly teammates. but from then on we see that they actively seek each other out & chose to grow closer. when the player jamie pissed off fouls him, sam is there. when sam decides to use his one haircut for his date with rebecca, jamie is there despite his inner turmoil and only leaves when he knows no one else will notice. i also think it’s very important to note that after what happened at wembley, sam immediately decides to seek out comfort in pursuing his most recent romantic encounter (rebecca), which i think highlights that sam was also feeling hurt for jamie and chose to pursue romantic relief (which maybe says something about how he feels about jamie). they continue to show their love and support for each other throughout the season.

then we get into s3 (yikes). while sam is also one of the people caught up in the zava whirlwind, it doesn’t necessarily diminish his relationship with jamie. while i do think it did hurt jamie that sam didn’t notice his struggles or check in on him, i think jamie was more hurt by the fact that NOBODY did, rather than just sam. and i think he shows more leeway towards the members of the team than he does the coaches in their obsession with zava because he understands that they’re still young and that’s it’s still easy to get caught up in all that. i also think it’s important to note that jamie still shows up to sam’s restaurant (wearing the sexiest outfit he could find) to support him despite being upset, and he doesn’t try to let his feelings overshadow the overall atmosphere. while i know some people see this as jamie being a team player, i think it has more to do with his relationship with sam than does it with that because we see him walking out of team meditation and showing more obvious disdain towards zava during the scene when they’re in the gym and zava steals his speech. then when we get to amsterdam, as roy is yelling at jamie on the bus, we see that jamie’s first reaction is to look towards sam (we see this in other moments where roy is being unhinged). in the strings that bind us, when the team flips off jamie, we notice him lingering on sam’s finger (which is quite close to his face) before speaking up. later when sam finds the team cleaning up his restaurant, jamie is the first one to answer sam’s question about why they chose to help out. in the next episode sam and jamie walk and discuss something together after the team finds out about the leak and deletes their nudes. then in la locker room aux folles, the camera focuses on a multitude of people turning towards jamie after the “somebody else in this room could be gay” but we don’t see sam’s (who jamie had shared a cute moment with like three minutes prior) reaction. when jamie does his little “i’m flattered” and the team laughs it off, only then do we see sam, who says they shouldn’t discuss it further. then we get a cute moment between jamie and sam when sam does his captain speech. skip to international break, jamie, after hearing that he’s making his england debut, immediately goes to see if sam is alright and tells him that he got screwed over. then, jamie chooses to wear sam’s number while he’s playing for england (just get married already). when jamie is having his breakdown during the press conference in mom city, sam is immediately worried about jamie’s behavior/attitude. i think the only reason we don’t see him checking in on jamie is because he can acknowledge that it might be easier for jamie to give space and let jamie come to him if he needs to.

i think the fact sam is able to give jamie space while also supporting him and letting jamie give him love in return is what makes it one of the healthiest jamie ships. while roy and jamie do have chemistry, roy is very resistant to jamie’s attempts to show support/comfort towards him. keeley, on the other hand, is unable to adequately support jamie while she’s trying to support and heal herself. sam and jamie have each others full and unconditional support, and sam is receptive towards jamie’s shows of love. i think this is essential to helping jamie heal because he hasn’t been able to show other men love and be met with love and reception in return. furthermore, sam doesn’t expect jamie to tell him all his secrets or come to him straight away, he has enough patience to let jamie work things out on his own, and will be there if jamie needs to come to him. this contrasts both roy and keeley’s approaches to getting jamie to open up during mom city, where roy yells and then somewhat comforts jamie and keeley brings up his worries in an attempt to gauge his feelings, and then they both proceed to stalk him until he reaches his mothers house. it wasn’t roy or keeley that made jamie feel better, it was jamie who knew what he needed and sought out his mother to comfort and reassure him. both keeley and roy are a bit restricting towards jamie and allowing him to express his feelings, with s1 keeley not explaining what made her upset (not communicating her boundaries) and laughing at his discomfort/fear with roy during the auction (dissuading him from communicating his own boundaries in fear of rejection/not being taken seriously). roy on the other hand attempts to manipulate jamie’s behavior and undermine the feelings jamie is expressing in those actions such as when pushes jamie into saying the ‘ugly boy’ thing and ignores the fact that jamie is clearly uncomfortable and that he has a lot of power over jamie in this scene, or when he tries to manipulate jamie into “backing off” keeley. when his attempts to manipulate jamie backfire, he tries to silence jamie through intimidation and physical aggression. overall, while it may not be intentional, both keeley and roy limit jamie’s behavior to the point where cannot fully express himself without fear of repercussions (whether that be mockery, rejection, or aggression). meanwhile jamie has the space to express himself how he wants when he’s with sam, and he doesn’t have to worry about being mocked or attacked for it. sam takes him and his emotions seriously in a way that others do not (although there could still be some improvement in that area for sam).

additionally, jamie is a great partner for sam because jamie is a very honest person and he is willing to learn, grow, and change. i think sam would value honesty a lot, because sometimes it’s better to hear what you need to hear rather than what you want to hear. From what we can tell, ola seems to be a very open and honest person as well, which is probably why sam values the truth. it’s also clear that sam likes it when others listen to him and ask for his input and jamie is willing to listen to sam and learn what sam’s boundaries are and he would respect those the best he could. i also think it’s important that jamie is one of the few people who shows pride in sam and recognizes his achievements and tells him that he should be proud of himself. when jamie has the opportunity to be jealous of sam becoming captain, he takes pride and joy in seeing him take on a new role instead. when sam doesn’t get picked to play for nigeria, jamie is the one to make sure sam knows that he deserved to play. when they lost their match after the dubai air protest, jamie is one to rally the team into celebrating sam and acknowledges the bravery of sam’s actions. they are just so perfect for each other!!!

[destiel-wings]

I noted down my thoughts while I listened to the tortured poets department for the first time (every track in order) and here's my album reaction

1) fortnight

I like the sound, makes me feel like the album is going to sound like midnights 2.0

2) the tortured poets department

somehow this song sounds exactly like i was expecting it to sound. love it, it'll def grow on me

3) my boy only breaks his favorite toys

interesting melody. caught me from the first note.

4) down bad

probably my favorite so far??? definitely midnights 2.0, particularly, I'd say the album so far sounds like midnight rain

5) so long, london

HER VOICE HERE HELLOO

another possible favorite. the intro gives me a mixture of christmas vibes + death by a thousand cuts intro

6) but daddy, i love him

the intro gave me happier fearless album vibes (with super subtle country touches), but it sounds like its own song. this is pure taylor with a 5.40 minutes song 💖👌🏻

7) fresh out the slammer

interesting change of rythm in the middle of the song, like in evermore. I'll need to listen to it again

8) florida!!!

the song i was most excited about cause i LOVE florence + the machine!!! I'm so glad she actually sang in it, i really felt the collab and there is something magical about this song. I would expect nothing less from a collab with florence 😍❤ i loved hearing taylor explore these more haunted/epic vibes. It still felt coherent with the rest of the album

9) guilty as sin?

loved it from the intro, love the rythm. I don't know what it is about it but it made me think it seems like a song that might have been from the 90s, but with a modern midnights sound?? one of my favorites.

that "am i allowed to cry?" in the end? PERFECT.

i felt some super subtle 90s vibes in certain moments of the song?

10) who's afraid of little old me?

the intro is chefs kiss perfection. OMG I LOVE THE WHOLE OF IT SO BADLY. One of the best songs of the album, 100%. Immaculate vibes. Great lyrics. Original melody that isn't flat standard but still catchy.

11) I can fix him (no really i can)

this song is like if cowboy like me was written for ttpd. and I'm saying this in the best way possible. this song is evermore(album)-coded. the melody reminds me willow too. 11/10 👌🏻

12) loml

excellent intro, yes, give me a sad song!!!! my favorite songs very often are in the second half of the albums or towards the end. this one is absolutely beautiful. another favorite (there are already so many favorites for me and I'm still at track 12 💀)

"I wish i could unrecall how we almost had it all" yes taylor, kill me please 🥲🙃💔

13) I can do it with a broken heart

this one is you're on your own kid's sister. It adds up to Taylor's songs whose music is 🤩💖🎊🎉 while the lyrics are 💀🔪💔😞

one of the songs that i was claiming for myself from the title alone.

14) the smallest man who ever lived

you can understand from the very first (sigh) note that this one is going to be a high quality song. I think this is more or less how i expected this whole album to sound like. a quiet folklore poetry heavy album. --but OH!! the way the song builds up in the second half got me!! LOVE IT LOVE IT. another one of the best ones.

15) the alchemy

I liked it. It has less elements that grip you on the first listen but i think it's one of those songs you won't able to get out of your head once you get them.

16) clara bow

this one surprised me. liked it a lot.

17) the black dog

I had high expectations for this one. I liked it. I'll need to listen to it again.

18) imgonnagetyouback

this is where I'm starting to hear this album's sound as its own (as in different from midnights 2.0). all the vocals have been very cohesive throughout the tracks. I love them. there's something unhinged about this album as a whole and I'm HERE FOR IT.

19) the albatross

perfect intro, I just knew from then it was going to be a 10/10 track already. this one is another one of the best ones. perfect. THIS is how i thought the album would sound like.

20) chloe or sam or sophia or marcus

beautiful, beautiful song. again I'm hearing something from evermore.

21) how did it end?

THE PIANOOOO!!! 🥺 THE VOCALS!!! ANOTHER FAVOURITE, AND ONE OF THE BEST ONES.

Maybe even my favorite???

22) so high school

90s vibes!!! again, but with the modern sound of the album. maybe I'm the only one who hears the 90s vibes and I'm making it up in my mind, but there's something slightly retro about it. and her mentioning american pie in the lyrics kind of confirms it. I'm in love with this song.

23) I hate it here

"I hate it here so i will go to secret gardens in my mind" ME TOO TAYLOR, ME TOO. love the melody of this song, and the concept. there's something delicate about it.

24) thanK you aIMee

i love that there's something from the past in this album, like taylor went back to her high school years bringing back old wounds and relating to how she is now.

25) I look in people's windows

what I'm loving about this album is how much more intimate it seems, compared to midnights. the sound may seem similar at first, but even that one is more intimate. It's less constructed, more unhinged at times, like she's writing her diary again, and that's something she hasn't done in a while, since folklore and evermore featured characters and stories that weren't necessarily autobiographical

26) the prophecy

I'M IN LOVE WITH THIS SOUND 😭😭😭 the whole album, and this song. It sounds so good. Another favorite.

27) cassandra

right there in my alley. immaculate vibes. I may cry this song is so beautiful. how much of a clown would that make me to say this is another favorite??

28) peter

why does taylor always put her best songs at the end of her albums, or in the extra/deluxe songs??? I'm in love with this one too, dammit. the melody and music is so perfect. one of the best ones??

29) the bolter

there's something of the early taylor in this song?? it's so cute

30) robin

ohhh. dreamy. something solemn, like a dreamy hymn? I can picture her sitting at the piano playing it, in front of an open window on a sunny morning with lots of green trees outside on the second floor.

31) the manuscript

again, somwhow this sounds exactly like i thought it would sound like. "but the story isn't mine anymore" hit 👌🏻🥺🥹

I think this album is going to be a little masterpiece. So many great songs. Catchy, but not in an obvious way. Very intimate. Emotional.

GENERAL THOUGHTS:

I'm obsessed already. I'm just mad at taylor for giving us incredible albums with half of them being digital only.