#I love having it as biscuits or on my bread or cake or drinks SO MANYYYYY
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
tejennnn · 4 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Happy Belgi's National Day! I want to thank 🇧🇪 for bringing L0tus Biscoff 🍪 to this world 😭😭😭😭✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️
406 notes · View notes
jude-duarte-wannabe · 3 months ago
Text
welcome to the bakery
currently playing; the bakery by melanie martinez "pack it, box it, flip it, top it... the bakery, i'm tryna make some more"
this was inspired by @bunnys-kisses so go check out their page, such incredible stuff <3
when you request, please make sure to let me know if it's from my smut prompts or my soft ones [soft request prompts are still in the works]
hey lovely, how can i help? may i take your order? what do you feel like today? personally i'm in need of some iced tea and all you have to do is pick a dessert, drink and server of your choosing please, please, please don't forget to indicate who you want me to write about!! also please keep in mind that i haven't written anything in a while so it might take a bit for me to back into the groove of it. <3
the bakeries i currently have open are: formula one, resident evil, bridgerton and criminal minds, just for now.[but i am open to any other fandoms you might have in mind! please do not hesitate to ask!!]
the servers i'm currently writing for include; charles leclerc, carlos sainz, lewis hamiltion, pierre gasly, lando norris, max verstappen, oscar piastri, leon kennedy, carlos oliveria, chris redfield, anthony bridgerton, benedict bridgerton, colin bridgerton, spencer reid, aaron hotchner and luke alvez.
i do also accept polyam relationships! [pairing + reader] but only three people just to make it manageable on my end!
all orders can be made to the inbox for @jude-duarte-wannabe and i'll get your order together when i can also let me know if you want your order to...
be extra hot; real smutty or have sweetener; extra fluffy
let me know if want to be added to my taglist by commenting <3 followed by the person.
Tumblr media
the bakery menu;
pound cake; "i can be rough and i don't want to hurt you"
churro's; "does my sweet boy need comforting"
cheese scone; "let your brother find out, i don't fucking care"
mille-feuille; "that's it, shit, such a good fucking girl"
cinnamon buns; "no promises"
gingerbread; "i mean i would totally make out with her/him but like platonically, you know"
baguette; "give me a minute, i really need to tickle the shit out of you"
pretzel; "i was never meant to fall for you"
cornbread; "you taste really good"
strawberry shortcake; "he's so cute, i really want to bite him"
soda bread; "wait a second... am i your lockscreen'
focaccia; "i could beat the shit out of you" "i know"
choux pastry; "i can't believe i ever loved you"
pumpkin muffin; "shut up... my girls asleep"
dinner roll; "holy shit, you still love him/her"
cakepop; "goodnight to my future wife, fuck the rest of you"
pull apart bread; "i love you"
souffle; "i'll be gentle"
powdered doughnuts; "marry me"
s'more; "the accent got to you, didn't it"
waffles; "you spill a single fucking drop and we're starting again"
shortbread biscuits; "if he pisses me off again, i'm fucking his girl"
red velvet cupcake; "does he know that i cum deep inside his little angel'
pancakes; "no, we can't, not here"
coffee cake; "i need to breed you"
french toast; "i don't think it'll fit"
crepes; "go back to sleep, you don't need to be awake for this sweetcheeks"
sweet pastry; "i'm trying to get you pregnant, now shut up and let me concentrate"
butter tart; "stop, don't fake it"
sugar pie; "stop wriggling"
zebra cake; "i'll make it fit"
carrot cake; "dirty girl"
date scone; "i'm going to make you a mama and your going to make me a daddy"
cookie; "do you feel that, how fucking deep i am"
brownie; "no fucking touching"
cheesecake; "don't yell at me"
pumpkin pie; "are you nibbling on me"
chocolate cake; "i'll use protection, i promise"
spice pie; "i wonder if your brother know that i cum inside you"
apple crumble; "i can't do this while you cat/dog is watching"
sausage roll; "i hate being your secret"
blueberry slice; "but what if somebody see's"
mushroom pie; "that looks like it hurt"
apple tart; "what do you mean you want me to choke you"
lemon slice; "i forget how small you are sometimes"
swiss roll; "your glasses are fogging up"
truffle; "send me an audio of you moaning"
oaty slice; "you smell like me"
cream puff; "this ends when your pregnant"
custard slice; "no hiding your face"
victoria sponge; "you wanna hold my hand"
english muffin; "i could die between these legs"
bagel; "where you going, this ain't over"
banana bread; "i can't believe you broke my bed"
hot cross buns; "i'll pay for the damages"
apple turnover; "can you keep it down"
fudge; "what do you mean noise complaint"
peach cake; "i've never done this"
tiramisu; "how could you be so stupid"
crumb cake; "nobody has to know"
custard tart; "you gonna let me cum inside"
date pudding; "your going to let me rawdog you, oh fuck"
mince pie; "so fucking dumb"
angel food cake; "did you just squirt, since when could you do that"
savory scroll; "stop stressing, i'm not going to post it"
chocolate chip cookie; "did you just call me pretty boy"
croissant; "don't you dare"
elcairs; "don't, leave them on"
chocolate mousse; "i'm sorry"
boston cream pie; "fuck it's dripping down your legs"
and to drink;
coffee; somnophilia kink
tea; semi public
juice; breeding kink
mocha; daddy kink
peppermint tea; mommy kink
vodka shot; rough sex
sparkling water; gentle sex
oat milk; one night stand
soy milk; friends with benefits
coconut milk; friends to lovers
almond milk; grumpy x sunshine
energy drink; doggy style
turmeric latte; fake dating
cold brew; possessive
espresso shot; dirty talking
chamomile tea; choking kink
glass of water; aftercare
herbal tea; soft but only for you
milkshake; size kink
pina colada; pregnancy
matcha latte; mixed with smau
cider; body worship
mai tai; loss of virginity
margarita; unprotected sex
chai; biting or hickeys [please let me know which]
earl grey; big cock
tonic water; age gap
soda; protected sex
root beer; caught in the act
americano; oral sex
whiskey; degrading language
vitamin water; dom/sub dynamics
irish coffee; drunk sex
lemon water; secret relationship
dark roast; sub character
hot chocolate; sub reader
iced tea; accentally leaking relationship
flat white; brothers best friend
iced latte; best friends brother
iced mocha latte; plus sized reader
smoothie; belly bulge
doppio coffee; wall sex
green tea; spiting kink
cortado; belly kisses
affogato; a bet
lemon ginger tea; single mom/dad
berry smoothie; accidental pregnancy
sunshine smoothies; fake dating
cappuccino; secret baby
rice milk; baby fever
cashew milk; somebody flirts with your bf/gf
iced chai; forehead kisses
143 notes · View notes
tianasimstreehouse · 2 years ago
Text
Occult Recipebook
Double, double toil and trouble; Fire burn and caldron bubble.
Tumblr media
INTRO
Occult gameplay is up there with one of my favourite ways to play. Food is a part of our Sims lives, and should also be for occults so that they can cook up their preferred foods.
This Occult Recipebook is a collection of custom recipes (food and drink) for Occult Sims in the Sims 4.
Tumblr media
I have started off this occult culinary journey with: ✨SPELLCASTERS✨
I have plans to later create foods for each occult life state, so I will keep adding to the recipe book.
“Spellcasters” as a life state can be played in so many different ways: they can range from gnarly evil witches who practice black magic and eat bird entrails, to happy little fairies who live in cottages surrounded by woods and flowers! I have tried to include a little bit of everything in the recipes I have created. These foods are a mix of fairy, fantasy, green garden witch, apothecary, or black-magic sorcerer etc. 
They effect Spellcasters and/or human Sims in many weird and wonderful ways.
E.g. Nettle Tea which helps teenagers suffering with acne, Milk Thistle Biscuits which leave the consumer with prickly thistles in their tongue, and Eye of Newt Soup which most Sims will find disgusting but which Spellcasters will happily slurp up.
RECIPES
39 new recipes for your Spellcasters!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
~ Realm of Magic is required for these recipes ~
**there's a fair amount of pack-integration, and be sure to read the pack recommendations on the Patreon post for each recipe** to make sure nothing is missing or glitching.
Meals Dandelion Salad - increases SCs gardening skill, fills PlantSims' hunger Nettle Soup Soft-Boiled Golden Eggs - makes Sims glow and glitter Pumpkin Pasties Pomegranate Halves Eye of Newt Soup - makes other Sims feel sick Valerian Root Pie - other Sims won't like this dish Elderberry Jam Toast Toadstool Soup - inspires SCs, normal Sims won't like this dish Salamander Stew - other Sims won't like this dish Spiced Honey Bread - SCs will gain all skills faster Raised Newt Pie - makes other Sims feel sick Dragon Livers - Werewolves will love these and normal Sims won't Raised Phoenix Pie - Sims will randomly breathe fire for a while and feel confident
Desserts Milk Thistle Biscuits - chance to get uncomfortable thistles in tongue Huckleberry Jam Cream Puffs - makes SCs playful Fairy Bread Soul Cakes Huckleberry Pie Juniper Berry Jam Biscuits Honeycomb Cakes - SCs will gain all skills faster Valerian Custard Tart Toadstool Cookies Cursed Cookies - wouldn't recommend eating these... serve them to enemies! Eating one may leave the SC eater cursed. Good Sims will sense the evil inside and get sad Canning *Requires Cottage Living Canning Skill Gooseberry Jam Elderberry Jam Rosehip Jelly Drinks *Bar/alcoholic drinks require Mixology skill, and a Bar. Acorn Coffee (*coffee machine) Pumpkin Juice Willow Bark Tea - A home remedy to cure most illnesses, food poisoning etc Sage Tea - soothes stress and anger, SCs are focused and improve logic skills faster Nettle Tea - helps teens suffering from acne Lavender Tea - makes Sims flirty Mugwort Tea - reduces fear or panic Butterbeer - gives SCs confidence Mandrake Ale Nettle Wine Dandelion Wine Elderberry Wine
INFO & DOWNLOAD (early access): https://www.patreon.com/posts/79514896?pr=true Milk & Cookies: Now! Sugar Cookies: May 24th Public: May 31st
Pro tip for Windows PC users: Please make sure to delete the MACOSX folders/files that can appear after you extract the mod's files, otherwise the game may throw an error and not load at all.
TRANSLATIONS Polish - ❤️ Daisy1728, find their translation over here French - ❤️ Heidi / LuniverSims, find their translation here
904 notes · View notes
two-red-lungs · 2 years ago
Note
Could you write reader finding out food tlb liked from when they were human/their childhood and making it for them as a gift?
I know you wanted a fic but I have so so many thoughts about each of the boys that I'm gonna collect them all in this post!
The Lost Boys: Their Favorite Old-World Foods
Tumblr media
Marko:
The little Italian stallion <3333
I HC him as growing up in inner Florence, Italy, during the artistic revolution. He was fairly elite/in high demand as a model
Basically, a brat with an ego
Still despite rubbing shoulders with the greats, he loved to come home to his family’s little city house and eat his mamma’s cooking
I think Marko’s favorite ‘old world’ dish is Garmugia: a simple springtime soup with cured pancetta, lima beans, scallions, and all sorts of other green veggies
It’s not fancy or especially delicious at all. But I think the smell, the taste, would make him freeze up, flooded with memories
and maybe for a second he’d stop being a feral, combative, snapping undead animal, and you’d catch a glimpse of the athletic young human from centuries ago
Dwayne: 
My personal HC for Dwayne is he got put in a residential school for native Americans at a young age, basically ripped away from his family
He probably escaped, hightailing it out at around 16, and then survived alone on the streets of early 1800s colonizer cities with the rest of the dredges of society 
(Which to me gives him a very strong “I fucking hate capitalism I truly hate this country and deep down I do genuinely want to see this broken system burnt to the ground, also FUCK cops” mentality)
I think Dwayne’s most memorable old-world food would be Gingerbread. Not the gingerbread we know: a soft, cake-like bread flavored with molasses, ground ginger, and cinnamon. Very dark and not very sweet
He worked odd (and illegal) jobs to stay alive and when winter rolled around street vendors would sell big hot slices of the stuff
Bringing him some real, legit circa-1810-gingerbread would probably make him remember the far-distant, little moments of actual joy he had in his human life
AND you’d probably be able to convince him to actually talk about his past for once
Paul:
Country boyyyy, I love youuuu
In my mind Paul is rural midwest, late 1800s when the industrial revolution was really kickin’ off and the cities were poppin (with drugs and alcohol lmao)
He was probably raised on a farm & did farmwork most of the time. Picture him in a low ponytail and work duds, pitching hay. That was probably for the best because that dude 100% has dyslexia and a math learning disability
But oooooh he was prettyyyyy and he knew it: I think Paul eventually ran away from his family’s farm and basically became a partyboy in a big city, like New York, and was changed there
I think Paul’s favorite old-world food is (brace for the cliche) Apple Pie!
Probably a rare treat his momma and sisters would cook up in the autumn and winter: smelling a good, home-style pie now makes him think of barefoot evening sitting on the farmyard porch, listening to cicadas
Unrelated, but I think Paul- that’s right, partyboy druggie bonerboy Paulie- still remembers how to tie a hog
David:
I have conflicting thoughts abt this motherfucker
His backstory HC for me is still a little elusive, but I have some basic details for him
He comes from a pretty fucked-up biological family (probably a crazy-abusive dad and absent mother), was 100% drafted in a war at some point (I suspect the civil war), and 100% deserted his station in that war. Out of cowardice, fear, or distain, I don’t know. 
I don’t think David really has a favorite food?? He’ll eat plain rice. Plain, oily noodles. Hard-tack biscuits. Literally anything like whatever it’s not his personal thing
David like drinking and smoking. I think David’s favorite old-world vice is Irish Whiskey. Again, not the drink we think of. A lot less refined, very rough and coarse: it was the most popular and easily-accessible spirit in the 1860s 
I think it reminds him of ‘simpler times’: just him, alone, human, in a dingy old bar, getting the cheapest drink he can get, ducking his head to avoid being seen by military officials and wondering where he can run away to next
Give him a straight shot of Irish whiskey in an old-style enameled bar glass and it’s one of the only times he won’t be full-on Mansplain Manipulate Manwh0re: he’ll probably sit on a beachside bench with you, drinking in silence, watching the waves crashing far away. Lost in thought. Looking as old as he really is.
59 notes · View notes
wtfuckevenknows · 11 months ago
Note
Okay, Nice Ask Week Ask -
You're invited to a potluck, what are you bringing?
Bonus round - it's a themed potluck and you have to bring a dish that is somehow emblematic of the last book or movie you loved. What are you bringing?
Alright Lim, I’m not sure I would call an existential crisis NICE exactly but here we go 😂
I have thought long and hard about this and as always I’m gonna cheat because I would need more Information for a straight answer. Am I responsible for a certain type of food, is there a general theme, what’s the occasion, what time of year is it?!
First of all if I could I would ALWAYS bring a charcuterie board!!! I have so much fun making them so if I could bring a snack (or two) that would be my offering.
Am I responsible for sides?! I’d bring a Mediterranean salad (with or without orzo) or my families secret recipe pasta salad or I’d bake some fresh bread (maybe olive bread, maybe cheddar bay biscuits).
Am I bringing a main dish?! This is actually the hardest one to decide but maybe I’d bring my chili mac or the taco pasta. If the potluck is around Christmas I’d ALWAYS bring my meatloaf stuffed with apples and chestnuts.
Am I bringing a drink?! Selfmade pink (cranberry) lemonade during summer, apple cider during winter.
Tumblr media
Am I bringing desert?! My Mousse au chocolat made out of silken tofu (I was gonna try it out with gingerbread seasoning this winter, but then my body happened so if that’s any good I’d bring that at Christmas time).
Am I bringing sweets? Chocolate orange fudge hands down!!!
Tumblr media
Am I bringing cake?! Tres Leches or my no bake straciatella torte.
Tumblr media
Onto that second part of your ask 🙃
The last book(s) I really loved were a hockey series and I have a cake tin in the form of a shirt. Soooooo I’d bake a cake and decorate it so it would resemble a hockey jersey obviously. I’ve also baked hockey cookies before.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Not sure I am happy with these answers but I also wanna stop thinking about it 😂
(And now I’m gonna unfreeze the silken tofu and @loveconquersall is just gonna have to suffer through a food coma this weekend)
8 notes · View notes
the-fiction-witch · 1 year ago
Text
Take My Hand P14
Tumblr media
Media Irl x 1910
Character Thomas Brodie Sangster
Couple Thomas X Reader
Rating Adorable 
Concept Take My Hand Series
|Thomas|
We headed down to the third class dining room and honestly I was kinda surprised by how small it was like you could fit four of these in the restaurant upstairs we went to some seats side by side surrounded by other people but they were all so kind they didn't care who I was or where I came from just happy I was there to share the time with them. We had the dinner admittedly it wasn't much but I didn't care it was so comforting the food made me feel so warm and cozy we even managed to snag a Yorkshire between us. We had small cuts of roast meats with a choice of potatoes or mash with gravy and cabin biscuits if you wanted them along with as much bread and rolls and rolls as you could stuff. I had to admit I ate my fair chair of cabin business they were really nice like a good shortbread and knowone else at the table seemed to like them so just kept passing them down to us, And finally we had little cake each for desert but I gave mine to one of the little girls from the family across from us so she didn't have to share with her big brother, and I shared with y/n even if I let her have the bigger half and much more of the cream.
"Shall we?" She asks
I feel so happy here with y/n, often chatting with those around us about little things all the stories I leant about these people all far more interesting then any silver spoon 'self made' money I head heard in the upper decks, all the while I held her hand and this just felt like home, I couldn't help but imagine a life for us and imagine her... As my wife. Even though I'd only known her a few short days I knew I wanted to spent the rest of my life with her.
The band of guys even invited us down to another common area.
"Yeah I'd love to" I smiled so we headed down with them got a drink each and watched the madness around, smoking, drinking, dancing, arm wrestling, all the sort of pub behaviour you'd imagine. You'd think perhaps it would be frightening to be an outsider that like upstairs you'd be treated as new, different and excluded until you slowly worked your way in talking to the right people and smiling at the right times,  but they all happily welcomed me I even won an arm wrestle with a guy, it felt like forever down here and I didn't care I'd rather be down here forever then up there for even ten minutes.
"Did you want to dance?"
"Ohh uhh I'm not sure I know this dance"
"Come on it'll be fine Thomas" she giggled taking my hand so I happily followed her onto the dance floor she had to lead me a little at first but eventually we got into a rhythm of it and I couldn't stop my smiles as we danced together after a spin I pulled her into my chest and kissed her sweetly
"I love you"
"Awww Thomas I love you too" she smiled "..but your engaged" she remained sadly
"I am. To you. if you'll have me?" I told her
"You mean it?"
"Absolutely and I promise the moment we get off this ship I'll marry you, hell I'll go up and find a priest in the chapel on C deck tomorrow morning if I have to. I want to marry you"
"Truly?"
"As true as I can mean it."
"But we've only known each other a few days"
"I doesn't matter I've never felt this way about anyone, I couldn't even imagine getting married when my father told me I was engaged, now... The only girl I can ever imagine marrying is you, your my angel and I love you so much"
"Aww Thomas that's so sweet, Then of course I'll Marry you!" She smiled jumping into my arms, I held her as tight as I could trying not to cry from utter joy "come on we should get settled before it gets too late" she smiled
"Your right, do you mind I stay with you tonight?"
"Not at all"
"Okay then lead the way my angel"
6 notes · View notes
deyzalee · 3 months ago
Text
Dear God,
Thankful and blessed today. All is well after my 26 hours duty. I arrived home safely. I cooked luncheon meat and ate it with white rice and drank coke. I was full after. I had my self care routine. I drank my vitamins and medicines. I slept and woke up at 5PM with the help of my alarms. I prepared myself for 4 hours duty. I ate iced gems biscuit. I arrived at Saif’s house safely. I played cooking fever. I cared and monitored my patient with the help of Ate Carme. Ate Carme shared food and I ate bread with cheese, cake. We had conversations. I did cortex. 4 hours duty ended and I arrived home safely. I did laundry and while waiting I had a quick shower. I did my self and will do skin care routine. I scrolled my social media accounts, chatted my family and friends. I watched random videos on Youtube and Tiktok. I read few pages of the Bible. I will drink my medicines and coke zero. I will hang my clothes to dry. I am so happy because Jako got the laptop already. Have mercy on us Oh God. Guide us always to the right path. Remove sickness, danger and negative things in our life. Answer our prayers in your perfect time. Thank you and I love you God.
0 notes
formeryelpers · 6 months ago
Text
Little Nelly, 3815 W Magnolia Blvd, Burbank, CA 91505
Tumblr media
Little Nelly started as a wedding caterer, which morphed into event catering and now, a neighborhood market and shop.
The place is lovely…it has the look and feel of a small European market – with ceramic dishes, cookbooks, greeting cards, baskets, French market bags, pantry items (spices, beans, pasta, sauces, tinned fish, olive oil, pickles, flour, granola, snacks), cheese, cold drinks, gelato, frozen foods (pizza, La Palma burritos), fresh bread, etc.. I didn’t see fresh produce though, other than some Harry’s Berries in the fridge.
The market has a limited selection. What really sets Little Nelly apart is their cooking and baking skills. They serve breakfast and lunch, plus bake a variety of treats (cookies, cakes, quiche, biscuits). Lunch is served from 11 AM – 3 PM. It takes awhile (my salad must have been made to order vs. already assembled), so regulars usually place online orders. I noticed they were out of three items on the lunch menu (there are only nine items on the menu). For lunch they have sandwiches and salads. There were some housemade items in the refrigerator as well.
Farro salad ($10): I was expecting a tiny side salad but the salad was full-size! And so good too – the ingredients were fresh, the farro made it filling. The salad had farro, harissa-roasted carrots (fancy baby carrots), baby kale, shaved caulfiower, chickpeas (firmer than the canned kind), sheep’s milk feta, and a lemon vinaigrette. Didn’t taste the harissa on the carrots but still loved the salad: the bitterness of the kale, the sweet crunch of the carrots, the nutty farro, the saltiness of the feta.
Mile high biscuit served with housemade strawberry preserves and whipped butter ($5): ginormous and tall, the exterior was crunchy but the interior was very moist. Best biscuit that I’ve ever had – others tend to be too dry. The texture was amazing.
Service was very friendly. There’s even a reward program, get a point for every dollar spent and a $5 reward when you reach $100. Parking was easy to find in a public parking lot off Magnolia Blvd. There are no tables for eating inside or outside, so plan to take your food to go.
5 out of 5 stars
By Lolia S.
0 notes
splendidtext24 · 8 months ago
Text
A post to mess with the system
Jelly sweet roll jelly beans biscuit pie macaroon chocolate donut. Carrot cake caramels pie sweet apple pie tiramisu carrot cake. Marzipan marshmallow croissant tootsie roll lollipop. Cupcake lemon drops bear claw gummies. Jelly bear claw gummi bears lollipop cotton candy gummi bears chocolate bar cake cookie. Cupcake muffin danish muffin cookie gummies. Jelly beans tiramisu pudding. Toffee soufflé chocolate cake pastry brownie. Oat cake halvah sweet roll cotton candy croissant lollipop. Macaroon tiramisu chocolate bar candy candy carrot cake jelly sweet. Gummies croissant macaroon dessert. Chocolate cake dragée pie.
Next level tbh everyday carry, blog copper mug forage kitsch roof party pickled hammock kale chips tofu. Etsy shoreditch 8-bit microdosing, XOXO viral butcher banh mi humblebrag listicle woke bicycle rights brunch before they sold out ramps. Twee shabby chic taiyaki flannel, enamel pin venmo vape four loko. Hexagon kale chips typewriter kitsch 8-bit organic plaid small batch keffiyeh ethical banh mi narwhal echo park cronut.
Zombie ipsum reversus ab viral inferno, nam rick grimes malum cerebro. De carne lumbering animata corpora quaeritis. Summus brains sit​​, morbo vel maleficia? De apocalypsi gorger omero undead survivor dictum mauris. Hi mindless mortuis soulless creaturas, imo evil stalking monstra adventus resi dentevil vultus comedat cerebella viventium. Qui animated corpse, cricket bat max brucks terribilem incessu zomby. The voodoo sacerdos flesh eater, suscitat mortuos comedere carnem virus. Zonbi tattered for solum oculi eorum defunctis go lum cerebro. Nescio brains an Undead zombies. Sicut malus putrid voodoo horror. Nigh tofth eliv ingdead.
Cat gets stuck in tree firefighters try to get cat down firefighters get stuck in tree cat eats firefighters' slippers kitty power ignore the squirrels, you'll never catch them anyway for what a cat-ass-trophy! or purr as loud as possible, be the most annoying cat that you can, and, knock everything off the table. Pretend you want to go out but then don't bite off human's toes, yet disappear for four days and return home with an expensive injury; bite the vet so catch eat throw up catch eat throw up bad birds.
This opera's as lousy as it is brilliant! Your lyrics lack subtlety. You can't just have your characters announce how they feel. That makes me feel angry! Anyhoo, your net-suits will allow you to experience Fry's worm infested bowels as if you were actually wriggling through them. I just told you! You've killed me! Fry! Quit doing the right thing, you jerk! Michelle, I don't regret this, but I both rue and lament it. Morbo can't understand his teleprompter because he forgot how you say that letter that's shaped like a man wearing a hat.
Airedale hard cheese mozzarella. Pecorino melted cheese port-salut emmental babybel cheese and wine melted cheese manchego. Everyone loves blue castello everyone loves fromage cheese slices airedale cheddar cream cheese. Bavarian bergkase who moved my cheese halloumi port-salut gouda jarlsberg ricotta rubber cheese. Stinking bishop smelly cheese brie.
Salvia glossier subway tile, leggings mustache YOLO semiotics chia. Pitchfork tbh af blog church-key meggings vaporware PBR&B master cleanse post-ironic man bun pabst mustache letterpress synth. Snackwave raw denim godard, 3 wolf moon shaman offal kitsch unicorn live-edge selvage schlitz fashion axe vaporware drinking vinegar prism. Shabby chic tacos artisan, chambray chicharrones cardigan leggings typewriter af pop-up williamsburg meditation PBR&B viral. You probably haven't heard of them DIY jean shorts subway tile fashion axe bushwick kitsch tumeric cloud bread vaporware freegan franzen pork belly chicharrones banh mi.
Man braid celiac synth freegan readymade, pitchfork fam salvia waistcoat lomo bitters gentrify four loko. Pitchfork semiotics post-ironic vegan. Tofu meditation microdosing hashtag semiotics venmo. Flexitarian vape tilde taiyaki. Prism poutine farm-to-table, messenger bag vegan taxidermy tattooed sartorial squid jean shorts fixie selvage trust fund vape.
Rutters Plate Fleet boom chandler Brethren of the Coast handsomely lookout marooned brigantine knave. Buccaneer gangway jack rum loot spyglass line Jack Tar fore gaff. Gaff topmast scuttle ballast swab draught measured fer yer chains dance the hempen jig Chain Shot yardarm.
0 notes
mydyspraxiablog · 1 year ago
Text
Sometime having dyspraxia can making feel very lonely because you can't going friends for coffee because you clumsy and haven't got any more for expensive coffee in the cafe and can't go pub because can't going drink this get really hard because Coelic coming in as well as Gluten free food and people say " I buy coffee and cake for you" " " No thank you " because know Gluten free food is expensive and if did buy for them need buy them one won't have money when bump in them again. Because got ask money for money if want give money. I wish Stafford Gluten free bread make on prescription I brought Gluten free bread small price £3.95 in Co.op shop and Gluten free cornflakes and have put Gluten free bread back off Gluten free cupboard just incase church hasn't got any Gluten free bread and might have promble eat lurch at Lower Drayton Farm Care part really enjoy the crouse part from biscuits and cakes be hand out everybody I have said No thank you because of my Coelic but luck got Gluten free bar but do dream of Gluten free birthday cake ,gluten free Christmas cake and Gluten free Christmas pudding but won't do that.
Now back to my dyspraxia bit clumsy idot but just me even went special school in Newcastle under Lyme I was wonder why was at blackflies school but rember hate sport day because wasn't good in rember netball in St Patrick school but in goal keep because wasn't good anythings eles and play stick in mud again always last pick o game hate sport day at school never did turn up because hate sport days.
Even when went Stafford college try netball again yet it was goal keep again why wasn't good game so stop playing sport because was rubbish be goal keep felt anything play to win instead taking part start be got play to win and spoil the games for me but did enjoy playing net ball at college but bit coward play hockey 🏒 and never try lascross Games use play cazzy golf and golf ⛳ Some rainbow guide games duck and goose game or Traffic light game it lot funny playing those game use like party game music chair ,music freezer but all those games have stop now don't even play past the gift any more just feeling things not going to plan I want going back to college because now 50 years old should get free crouse but only downfall not enerty 3 do college so don't know what do next?
I want make friends and have friends not worry about money my dream job working with animals feed the cats and dogs 🐕"" and brush them won't be able cut there nails on there paws.
I love have job see noughting but cats and dog brush them give love and care but won't happon.
This want have for tea tonight popcorn going see ant and Dec programme finshed and going have some cornflakes and drink of milk
Tumblr media
1 note · View note
psychelis-new · 1 year ago
Note
🍁Autumn Asks🍂
Amber
Blanket
Boo
Crow
Creature comforts
Cozy
Dream
Oven
Quiet
Syrup
Tasty
Warmth
That's a lot of ask....😅
How are you? I hope you're just fine...
Here's a gif of video I took a few hours ago...my country doesn't experience four seasons, so I don't know how Autumn feels like. I only have the power of imagination 😝
Tumblr media
Hahah hi Nari! Happy to see you around. I'm doing okay thanks, I hope you're doing fine too tbh. Thanks for sending, as usual! Hope you're having a lovely day/night.
Gonna answer your questions and then add something for you too. Love your moon's gif. I'm thinking about the moon a lot these days :)
Amber - what's something you do every day? I think it means in Autumn so.. Uhm, I try to sunbathe as much as I can with my friends lizards (when possible ofc lol)
Blankets - sweaters or fuzzy blankets? Sweaterssss
Boo - ghosts or witches? Hmm ghosts?
Crow - what's an unpopular opinion you have on autumn? Dunno what can be an unpopolar opinion about Autumn... Rainy days are cool? And also... Autumn is cool too, it has been prolly my fav season for a huge part of my lifetime but... it's starting to get overrated lol. You also get running nose more easily because of how much the temperature changes through the day. :/
Creature Comforts - cats or dogs (or other)? Dogs before everyone else<3
Cozy - describe your ideal fall day. Wearing my fav coat and going out to casually walk around under the sun. Hitting the the park and stepping over a bunch of crashy colored leaves; getting to sunbathe a bit and meeting a couple of dogs I can pet (been there, done that<3).
Dream - describe your perfect au. My au regarding autumn? Uh... Idk, should I write a ff? Honestly it feels good as it is... okay, maybe I'd like to experience more often Autumn near big rivers or the sea. Or also somewhere else in the world. I guess it may be different and a nice experience.
Oven - what's your favorite holiday thing to bake? Hmmm not that there are real holidays here in Autumn but I generally bake cakes, like apple pies and chocolate/almonds cakes. I want to try something else this year though.
Quiet - how do you relax? I sleep :') Or I walk around (especially try to go to the countryside if I can) trying to take some pics and listening to music. I used to read once but I can't so... I do what I can lol. I might also watch movies and indeed I bake more often in this season.
Syrup - waffles or pancakes? Uh... waffles maybe, Idk... I am not sure I really tried them properly yet tbh, maybe I should make them myself
Tasty - do you have a comfort food? Comfort food... These days I discovered rice with cheese (different types mixed together) and I moved it on the first place of my fav comfort foods list lol. But I am also eating rice flour biscuits and bread as usual.
Warmth - bonfires or indoor fires? Never really experienced any yet but bonfires feel cooler.
-
Hmm your country sounds exactly like a country I'd like to visit! What autumn feels like... let me try to add something for your imagination. The light is particular in autumn, still bright but warmer, more on the golden-shade. And if you stop under the sun (even not during the golden hour) you can feel its warm rays laying like a blanket over you. Speaking of which: after the first late summer storm, nights get suddenly chill (and so the air especially in the early morning) and you need to put on a blanket to sleep and a sweater + eventually a scarf (or even a coat, later on) to get out. So yeah, the sun just feels good in this season. Autumn for me starts with the smell of ripen rice, frogs and "humidity" filling my nose when I open the windows of my home and it ends with kids running under the trees trying to catch falling leaves on a foggy day, before it starts to rain. Autumn often feels sad and nostalgic, at times even comforting though, like wearing your favorite sweater and coat or drinking a cup of hot tea or chocolate. It also feels more natural to start to spend time inside during this time, espcially on cold rainy sundays. TBH it's not really very Autumn-ish yet here (except for the light) but still... Ofc you have already seen images too, but I'm gonna add a bunch of mine too:
Tumblr media
1 note · View note
luxlucis3 · 2 years ago
Text
Wheat grains Chocolate Chip Biscuits
Tumblr media
I love chocolate snack cookies - Setting up I LOVE chocolate food cookies! When I seriously considered all of the things that I adore in a cookie, I actually started playing around along with my favorite chocolate nick cookie recipe and additionally came up with this one. I needed to make it a lot more "healthful", a little more major and less wonderful. The addition from oats, whole wheat pastry flour and wheat or grain germ make this some sort of stand-out that doesn't personal taste like a "healthy" biscuit. https://www.cookiesandry.com.au/
This cookie at all times wins rave assessments in my "Baking By using Whole Grains" modules. Especially from mothers who are trying to help make healthier treats with regard to their kids and add them (sometimes with no their knowledge) to be able to whole grains. Despite the fact that this is still some cookie - the application still has offspring, butter and carbohydrates - it also has got some really great developments that help it to above the "regular" chocolate chip dessert. The whole wheat flour, oats and grain germ are full of fiber, b vitamin products, and antioxidants in addition to getting them inside cookie form cannot be all that bad!: )
You can use either wheat grains pastry flour or simply white whole wheat flour in these biscuits with equal results. Regular 100% whole-wheat flour is fat for these. What exactly is the difference? Many my students demand that and it's not as much confusing than this indicates. Basically it comes down to protein subject matter. Think of the peptids (or gluten) material in flour being the structure. The higher this protein, the much better and more resilient your structure is (think chewy artisanal bread and pizza dough). Less protein ends up in a softer system (cakes, muffins along with cookies, for example).
So , which flour should you use in all the cookie recipe? That's a matter of flavor. The whole wheat flour we're used to, a stuff that produces compressed, chewy, tangy loaves is milled (ground) from what is named "hard red winter season wheat". It has a healthy protein content together with distinctive color and additionally flavor. It is best for all kinds of yeasted loaf of bread and doughs and many quick breads in addition to muffins. White whole wheat grains flour and whole grain pastry flour tend to be milled from softer spring wheat which happens to be lower in protein and so produces a more irritated, less chewy merchandise than whole wheat flour. It is still your "whole" grain (meaning the bran along with germ have not already been stripped away), a bit softer and simpler to incorporate into cooked goods. Most meals using whole wheat flour will specify which sort of flour to utilise.
You can find white wheat grains flour and whole-wheat pastry flour as part of your local supermarket inside the baking section (look for brands just like King Arthur Flour, Bob's Red Work or Hodgson Mill) and at Total Foods and your area food co-op (both of these usually have this in bulk like well).
I like a good less sweet candy bar and usually work with just about 1 drink packed light brown lightly sugar and 1/8 - 1/4 glass cane sugar. A sweet nuttiness for the oats and toasted wheat germ add more sweetness to the sandwich, making it easy to diminish the sugar. I exploit evaporated cane liquid which is a healthier replacement of the refined sugar. Evaporated cane juice doesn't necessarily undergo the same handling that refined glucose does and therefore drives most of its nourishment and more importantly, wipes out unwanted chemicals. Seek out evaporated cane beverages or pure walking stick sugar at Individual Joe's, Whole Foodstuff and your local foods co-op.
And here i will discuss the best part of this information, the recipe!
Whole-wheat & Oat Sweets Chip Cookies 1 1/2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour 3/4 cup whole wheat pastry flour 3/4 mug quick oats 1/4 cup toasted rice germ 1 tsp baking powder 1/2 tsp baking soft drink 1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened 1 container packed light browning sugar 1/4 -- 1/2 cup evaporated cane juice (cane sugar) 2 massive eggs 1 tsp vanilla 1 drink semi-sweet chocolate money 1 cup walnuts (optional)
Preheat furnace to 375 levels. Place oven wine racks in upper together with lower third within the oven. Line 3 baking sheets by using parchment and reserve.
Sift dry elements together. Cream butter and sugar right until light and deep. Add eggs, individually, until fully utilized. Stir in vanilla. Add about 2/3 of the dry constituents to creamed combination, blending well. Dispose of chocolate chips and additionally nuts (if using) in the rest of the dried out flour mixture and next add to the creamed mix. Stir well to mix.
Drop by spoonsful upon prepared baking bedsheets and place on rack. Bake 6-7 moments then rotate pots and pans from top to bottom racks. Cook another 6-7 units until golden in addition to almost set. Really do not over bake! Take out from oven along with cool on parchment sheets or twine racks.
0 notes
hikari-kaitou · 3 years ago
Text
Capcom's Official AA Fanclub Surveys - DGS Edition
Many Western fans may be familiar with the Turnabout 4koma comics that get posted on the official AA fanclub site that Capcom runs, thanks to some lovely fans on tumblr and elsewhere who have shared their translations. What fewer people seem to know about is the character surveys.
Back in the old days, they used to hold a survey on Capcom's official AA fansite every few months where they'd write about the seasonal activities of a handful of characters and ask fans to vote for the funniest/most pleasant/strangest/etc answer.
They stopped doing them in like... 2016? 2017? The original text is lost for good as far as I can tell. Even the wayback machine couldn't help because the content was password locked and you can't get past the password wall while remaining in the archived version.
Fortunately, I saved some of my translations of them so I thought I’d share them.
Cut for length...
"February has begun, and the DGS cast is nearing the end of their journey aboard the RFS Alacrei. Which of them acted the most strangely?"
Ryuunosuke ~ Exhausted from his intensive study session, he decided to try some katana swinging practice as a change of pace and to combat his recent lack of exercise. But because he wasn't used to handling the katana, he swung it too hard and it went flying out of his hands and got stuck in the wall right next to Sherlock, who had just entered the room. Sherlock asked him, "aren't you supposed to be studying right now, Mr. Naruhodo?" and handcuffed him to his desk.
Susato- worked on developing a curriculum for Ryuunosuke. 'If we keep going at this pace, he won't be able to learn it all in time... It'll be hard on Naruhodo-sama, but we'll have to work hard through a couple of nights together.' With that thought, she created a harsh study schedule, and almost seemed to be looking forward to it for some reason.
Sherlock- Driven by excitement over the thought of returning to England after a long absence, he went up on deck to stare at the ocean. Being February, it was very cold out there and he ended up being chilled all the way to the tips of his fingers. He returned to the ship cabins and amused himself by putting his frozen hands on Ryuunosuke, who was stuck in his room studying.
Van Zieks- Upon hearing from Vortex that there was a Japanese exchange student coming to England to study law, he smashed a Lord's Bottle. He apparently also didn't care for the fact that that Japanese student wouldn't be alone, because he proceeded to shatter his chalice, too.
Hosonaga- in order to provide a respite from studying, he provided some hot chocolate. They enjoyed a pleasant tea time, marveling over how sweet and delicious the drink was until Sherlock piped up with some unnecessary trivia: 'Actually folks, chocolate has long been used in Europe as an aphrodisiac!' Everyone promptly spat it out."
"The long winter is nearly over and spring is on it's way, putting the DGS cast members in a celebratory mood. Who found the best way of enjoying spring?"
Ryuunosuke: the Yuumei University faculty members were holding a flower viewing event, and he joined the assistance committee. He exhausted himself keeping the blankets clean so the intense shower of flower petals wouldn't pile up too high on them, delivering sake and snacks, and mediating whatever pointless fights arose. To top it all off, for some reason his compensation was only a single piece of leftover candy. Talk about a sad result!
Susato- her father and the others living in his dormitory were  holding the flower viewing event, so she got up early to prepare the bentos. But her father carelessly forgot to tell her that they wanted tea cakes, so she had to go around the house and neighborhood collecting sweets. For some reason, she ended up being able to gather caramels, biscuits, candy sticks, basically everything but tea cakes, for the tea ceremony.
Sherlock- he disguised himself as a beat officer and infiltrated Scotland Yard to have some fun. There was a real beat officer napping on his feet in the spring sunshine, and while observing him, Sherlock ended up falling asleep too. Detective Gregson gave them a good scolding when he found them, but then Sherlock revealed his true identity with a "hey, it's me, folks!" "What the blazes do you think you're doing?!" Gregson shouted, his rage growing even more, and Sherlock ended up making a run for it.
Van Zieks- went to the vineyard to oversee the production of the contents of his Lord's Bottle. As he viewed the still unopened grape blossom buds, he thought about how they would someday grow up to fill his Lord's Bottle, and ended up going around to look at each one. But the farm hands couldn't stop wondering whether the bottle itself or its owner's heel might come flying at them and were quite uneasy.
Asougi: exhausted himself running around since early morning helping with the professors' flower viewing event. When it was over, he took a break, sharing his reward candy stick [the name of the candy literally translates to 1,000 year candy] with Ryuunosuke, who had also been helping out. 
"I wonder if the candy's effect is halved if you share it with someone."
"That still gives us 500 years."
They laughed and enjoyed looking at the flowers until dark. Then they parted ways with a handshake and a "see you later, best friend."
(This one was something about celebrating New Years. For some reason I didn't save the original question)
"Ryuunosuke ~ To celebrate New Years, he planned to pound mochi with everyone at the office. He somehow managed to get his hands on some mochi rice and he and Sherlock started pounding. Iris was having such fun watching them that she steamed a whole bunch more mochi rice so they could have some to share, and he and Sherlock spent the whole evening pounding mochi like crazy.
Asougi~ Because it's New Years, he went around to a bunch of shrines. When he drew his new year's fortune, he got a "horrible luck" result. "I'm not worried about it," he claimed, and headed up to the mountains early on New Years morning and work hard on a full training course of purification by water, meditation under a waterfall and wooden sword practice. It seems that he was working really hard to clear his mind of all earthly thoughts
Sherlock- Agreed to help Ryuunosuke pound mochi. As Ryuunosuke was flipping the mochi over, he carelessly dropped his badge into the bowl and Sherlock mixed it in without noticing, so they had to crack open both the hard and soft mochi to look for it. Fortunately they found it in the 4th one they checked, but apparently Sherlock got his hands and face covered in sticky white mochi in the process.
Susato- Wore a furisode and went with her father to do the first shrine visit of the year. The shrine was incredibly crowded and they had to wait in line for a long time, but she brought the Encyclopaedia of British Law and a copy of the Strand Magazine in her sleeves to secretly read as they waited so she actually ended up enjoying the wait.
Van Zieks- Ryuunosuke cheerfully gave him some mochi as a New Year’s (which at that time was celebrated at the same time as the Chinese New Year) gift, which he accepted confusedly, wondering “...Can the Japanese not even keep track of when the New Year is?” Because Ryuunosuke referred to it as a rice cake, he tried to eat it like a regular cake without softening it with heat first. It was so hard that he couldn’t imagine how it could possibly be food, and ended up misunderstanding the Japanese even more!
"Autumn has arrived, and the weather is starting to cool off, which means that everyone is becoming more active. Which character chose the most pleasant autumn activity to keep busy with?"
Iris was making bread but her hands are small and it’s difficult for her to knead the dough, so she asked for Ryuunosuke’s help. She wanted to make enough to hand out to Gina and all the other homeless children in the East End, so she made a massive amount and Ryuunosuke was stuck kneading this massive mountain of bread dough all day. Apparently he became such a expert at kneading that he could be a baker now.
Asougi was practicing with his sword, slicing autumn-colored ginko leaves as they fell from the tree. He cut so many leaves, though, that he ended up making a big mess on the ground, the number of fallen leaves now having increased, and it took him a long time to clean it all up.    
Sherlock: Ryuunosuke told him that he was making anpan (bread filled with sweet red bean paste, the bane of my Asian-dwelling existance) and asked Sherlock to help by being in charge of getting the poppy seeds they’d need to sprinkle on top, so Sherlock went out and gathered a ton of poppy seeds. In fact, he got so many of them that no one knew what to do with them all cuz they had a huge amount of leftovers. Sherlock said, “Well, they’re only the size of poppy seeds! Surely you two can deal with them somehow! Ahahaha!” and Iris scolded him.   
(I couldn’t capture it in English, but Sherlock’s line contained a pun, and a pretty stupid one at that, so that’s part of why he got scolded)
It’s grape harvesting season, so Van Zieks commutes to the winery regularly to direct the production of the contents for his “Lord’s Bottle.” He demands perfection in everything from the selection of the grapes to the way they’re squeezed, and the winery staff is terrified by the “grim reaper’s” gaze and heel swinging (i.e. the leg thing he does in court) so they grumble as they work. 
"Hearing that there’s a holiday in the West called Halloween, the people involved with the court in Japan decided to try it out themselves. Naturally Halloween is a big deal in England as well. So, which member of the DGS cast had the best celebration?"
Team Ryuunosuke and Asougi- Asougi got Naruhodo up on his shoulders and they draped a white sheet over themselves to make a ghost costume. They went out like that, but Naruhodo had such exaggerated reactions to the fear of the people who saw them and to bumping his head on tree branches that they ended up losing their balance and falling on top of each other?!   
Sherlock Holmes- went wearing a horse’s head mask. Iris used her skills to make it a fancy horse covered in stars, but the eye holes weren’t well made and he had to wander around blindly. Because of that he tripped hard over a pile of coal! He ended up getting so dirty that the stars on his costume were covered up!
Van Zieks- took inspiration from his nickname and dressed up as the grim reaper. He covered himself up with a skeleton mask and hood figuring no one would know it was him. Unfortunately he got angry when he saw Megundal (McGilded) pass by and started throwing bottles and glasses and ended up giving himself away.
"November has arrived, and autumn is nearing its end. However, the DGS cast is still keeping busy, even on their days off. Which character chose the most interesting way to spend their late autumn day?"
Ryuunosuke- Thinking that he’d better learn more about British culture if he was going to be a defense attorney in Britain, he went down to the East End with Gina for a little observation. However, because an Asian like him stood out so much, he got mobbed by the other children. On top of it all, his arm band got stolen from him and he had to send a replacement request to Yumei University on the other side of the ocean.
Asougi- He went for a meal at La Quantas. The customer at a nearby table got a persimmon for dessert and scarfed it down, saying “Mm! This is it! This sweetness makes it worthy of being called a treasure among foods!” Asougi tried to comment on this by saying, “The customer at that table sure is enjoying his pershim--gak!” but he may or may not have accidentally bitten his tongue in the process and been unable to finish his sentence.
Iris- She accepted Ryuunosuke’s request to learn more about British culture and prepared a bagpipe and kilt costume for him. “This outfit sure is breezy,” Ryuunosuke said shyly upon trying it on. With Ryuunosuke now dressed, he, Iris, and the others from their office headed over to Gregson’s place to get him to treat them to some fish and chips.   
Sherlock- He accepted Ryuunosuke’s request to learn more about British culture and cooked up some European style curry for dinner. Thanks to the fact that his secret ingredient was a large amount of Chinese herbal medicine style spice, it caused some strange side effects and Ryuunosuke, who’d eaten it, ended up passing out and falling over.
“Another taxing trial for Ryuunosuke has finished and now it’s December. As the year draws to a close, which character acts the strangest?”
Ryuunosuke- he was recruited to help with snow removal around Yumei University and the courthouse and he enthusiastically began his task with the help of a large shovel. He got a little carried away, though, and ended up accidentally burying his umbrella, which he’d left propped up against the side of the building, in the snow he’d just finished shoveling.  He had no choice but to share Asougi’s umbrella on the way home.
Asougi- On the way home, he nods silently to Ryuunosuke’s question of whether he’d finished his travel preparations and changes the subject: “...Come to think of it, it seems that tomorrow is celebrated in the West as God’s birthday.” “I’ve heard that they eat chicken as part of the traditional celebration. Wanna try it?” Ryuunosuke asks invitingly. Asougi is strongly opposed to that particular menu item, however, and they end up going out for their usual beef stew that night instead.           
Susato- in addition to her year-end travel preparations, she also was busy with straightening up the book room in her home. She managed to get the law books in order when she suddenly stumbled upon some old issues of Strand Magazine! She hurried through the rest of her cleaning, then began flipping through the magazines she’d found, trying to decide which to take with her on her trip. She accidentally lost herself in her reading and didn’t realize it until it was already the middle of the night.
Sherlock- he was in the middle of a long ship voyage when Christmas night came. His mind on his partner in a far-off country, he made a toast alone on deck, when suddenly the crew began shooting off fireworks with a cry of “Merry Christmas!” Sherlock had to dart back and forth across the deck to prevent the fireworks from hitting him and setting off the explosive chemicals he carries with him.
Main series edition
562 notes · View notes
hhjs · 4 years ago
Text
forget me not.
Tumblr media
♡ based on — "During times of war. I want to say: I only love you, And I cling you, Like the peel clings to a pomegranate, Like the tear clings to the eye, Like the knife clings to the wound." and the song nightlife by daydream masi.
♡ summary  —   Hyunjin's unsure of the tingle in his gut, why it's happening. But he thinks, just for a second, it feels a little like hope.
wherein, putting your heart on the line for the sake of doing favours isn’t a frequent component in your schedule. But what happens when this favour is asked for by the boy you may or may not have fancied for far too long?
 You accept it. 
 For a very embarrassing reason, really, which is — you think Hwang Hyunjin needs you.
♡ pairing— hwang hyunjin x reader
♡ word count— 8.8k whoopsies
♡ genre and alternate universe — angst, fluff + hanahaki au.
♡ author's note— this was supposed to be a drabble and then i sort of lost my fucking mind ehe...also this is easily the worst thing i have ever written im so sorry aaa but this is a lil present from my end hahaha
♡ warnings— suggestive content, vomiting, mention of blood. allusions to depression and heartbreak.
Amongst other things, you're extremely bad at saying 'no'. You don't mean the word per se...but the underlying connotation of this very monosyllable which may come at the expense of letting another person down.
It's sort of stupid, you understand, your friends have constantly voiced their worries for your extremely complacent nature more often than you'd think actually. But it all goes over your head. See — old habits really do die hard.
When you're eight, this very defect takes you to dreadful saxophone lessons your mum spoke so highly of. When you're 15, it gets you called to the principal's office for flashing Jeongin trigonometric functions in Mister Choi's pop quiz, when you're older, things are definitely no different.
The passenger seat is occupied, Hyunjin's holding a tangled muffler to his suede jacket clad chest. At 21, he's become someone you used to know. A friend of a friend, Felix's to be very specific. But the man in question, who was supposed to be his ride, passes off this duty for kegstands and you just happen to be the designated driver for the night, shuffling Jisung beside Changbin and Chan, who claims to be 'sober' even though he's half asleep.
Hyunjin is uncharacteristically quiet.
There's a polite smile on rendered your way as your eyes meet. A small curvature along his plump bottom lip, tighter around the edges. Still this simple formality is so beautiful that you feel something inside you come alive.
When Jisung starts snoring, you flip on the radio and Pink Floyd's Wish You Were Here comes on.
Your fingers feel numb when they come to tap out a rhythm to the track. It's nice. Tingling guitar riffs swelling, David Gilmour's gruffy voice pours in from faulty speakers. The more the song progresses, the more you find yourself attempting to think about anything that will distract you from the boy beside you, in the flesh no less.
So late at night, the main road is eerily silent. Cobblestones reflecting the sound of tires thumping against its layout, streetlights blinking at you from their drooping heads. Across the street, a baker is tucking away leftover bread and buskers are packing up their beat up guitars, a man in his late 50's pulling his blanket to his nose as he rests a head full of gray hair on the cold pavement.
You glance at Hyunjin from the corner of your eye and find that his staggering smile has completely disappeared. Now there's a distant glaze in his eyes. It's like he's here, in this moment, with you, but at the same time, he's somewhere else.
Under the impression you've done something wrong, you immediately begin to panic. But the thing is, you don't actually know if you should ask. Would it constitute as crossing a line if you had anyway?
Hyunjin covers his mouth with a sleeve, muffled retching building beyond fabric.
The reasonable assumption is obvious. It's not abnormal to be nauseous when you've got one too many drinks in you. He motions for you to pull over, incoherent sentences practically melding together, words forming and dissipating between choking fits.
You scramble to dig out a bottle of mineral water you habitually deposit in the glove compartment, offering him the tissue first. Ears perking up in satisfaction when a garbled thanks escapes his parted lips. But then... something weird happens.
As your eyes flicker to unintentionally glance at the contents discarded on the pitch grey sidewalk, you freeze in your seat.
You were never a big believer of superstition, not someone who buys into myths only meant for the fiction genre. Sure, you can be gullible sometimes...but what's happening falls no way under the realistic category.
The lethal Hanahaki disease, only inherited by some unlucky descendants, every moment in your head prior to this one, was something that's obviously non existent.
Yet... there's so much blood, too much blood attesting to your blatant ignorance. The petals are of a white rose, smudging together in swirls of grotesque crimson in mimicry of a sheen of red sticking to the inner corners of his lips. It has happened before, you can tell, from just how unsurprised he looks.
Hyunjin's stare flits to commit every detail of your to memory, in what only seems a quick study of gauging your forthcoming reaction, though even before you can produce a coherent thought, he says,
"You can't tell anyone." His voice drops a few octaves as though he's afraid your snoring friends in the back might've noticed. "Please."
Hyunjin's face softens by the slightest, contrary to his firm demand, there lies a desperation you couldn't overlook.
In retrospect, what you're about to tell is ultimately a promise that'd come back to bite you in due time. However, see now, you're extremely bad at saying no. Somehow you're even worse when it comes to Hyunjin. So you blink, turn the radio off and say,
"Okay."
The pool is preheated. For that you're most thankful.
Frankly, you couldn't imagine what it'd be like being pushed into a chilly body of water mid winter. Not that it's pleasant otherwise, you can't swim.
Well at 15, you hadn't quite learned to. The other kids have scurried inside to hog freshly baked Snowman biscuits Seungmin's mum is renowned for.
Then and you think you'll never quite forget it, Hyunjin's wearing an orange power ranger t shirt, it's darker now that it's wet, his glasses are marked with uneven splatters. His face scrunches up at the sudden splash of wetness engulfing his body. He wasn't planning to get in the water.
"Hold on tight." He says, wounding your arms around his neck, your calves tighter to his sides to support your shivering body. Back then Hyunjin's hair was black, cropped short and swept to the side, he smells like fabric softener and skittles. A water donut is discarded in the middle of the pool.
Everybody you know and don't know, from the birth of superheroes stuck in comic books to valiant protagonists behind fuzzy television screens, has this inherent desire to be saved. From the world, from themselves. No, no, it doesn't have to be a grand gesture, swooping them off of their feet from the grasp of surly men in dark alleys, sometimes it's really just simple. Sometimes people save you in the most ordinary way there is.
The weight of your form on his bright pink water donut while he stood on his toes to merely rest his elbows so the item wouldn't flip, a small act, certified this very claim, had not the nimble touch of his cold fingers, brushing away wet hair from your face, to anxiously ask if you're okay met the purpose. He talks to you like the sound of his voice has the power to injure you.
You nod slowly. Like this, it feels like you're going to be.
Hyunjin pouts, looking perfectly unconvinced. He paddles the pair of you to steel stairs spiraling into the pool, so he can stand without just his nose peeking out of the water, he looks at you once again, a wrinkle between his dark, arched eyebrows and says solemnly, "Jisung's such an idiot sometimes, isn’t he?"
But isn't he your friend? You want to ask. Something stops you though —his tone tells you you aren't the only one to fall victim to Jisung's practical jokes. Not that they were offensive or anything. Han Jisung, the same person who twiddles his thumbs when he wants the last chicken nugget and cries every time you watch Howl's Moving Castle together, genuinely doesn't mean any harm. It's just that...when he's comfortable with people, who aren't many, he tends to do a lot of dumb things. Dumb, endearing things that Minho will kill him for someday.
"A little bit," You mumble under your breath. Heat rising to your face at the possibility of Hyunjin being concerned for you. He sounds almost angry. "Thanks by the way."
It's rather pitiful to remember. Because with time, Hyunjin's world becomes so big that your interaction stands to be too insignificant to not forget. Before you know it, he's the shooting guard of your school's basketball team, just a handsome face who dates better girls, makes better friends. It's superficial and a little sad.
No, no, a little sad is an understatement actually.
To see someone you understood intimately, a boy who always described details too much just to stray from the main story, a boy with too many emotions bubbling to an awfully animated surface; someone who was passionate, sensitive and so nauseatingly big hearted...change into a man who is indubitably untouchable...is tragic. At least.
Yet funnily enough — you can't quite imagine a world without Hwang Hyunjin. His ringing laughter rippling through loud ambiences, his distant humming of Christmas carols whilst he absently skimmed through spines of children's novels and his eyes glimmering in adoration whenever he spoke of something he loved — Without him, you imagine, there would be a massive deficiency in your world, in the world. Like if birthday cakes came with the biggest slice carved out.
Hyunjin grins, a big sort of candid grin that turns his eyes into upturned crescents. His previous temperament long forgotten. Suddenly, this utterly atrocious happening seems to not be so bad. Suddenly you don't mind that Jisung is an idiot sometimes.
"Of course."
Hyunjin is not perfect. Hyunjin is no prince charming.
People don't know this. They don't understand this.
He ends up paying for dinner when he's out with a big crowd even though they were supposed to split the bill, he ends up crying when he gets angry and he is an abysmal liar, in every sense of the phrase. Hardly ever succeeding to hide his emotions when he should. When he was a kid his parents reminded him that it's a good thing to be unapologetically himself, that being honest is a good thing.
But as your eyes meet from across an ocean of people quagmired by crunchy leaves, sticky remnants of rain and his ex girlfriend who he now claims to be okay with being friends with, on her toes to poke his cheek whilst Chan's arm wraps around her waist, the soft white roses ornamented on a bow she loves wearing all the time, he thinks it's far from an agreeable trait to have.
Actually whilst you balance a newspaper under your arm and bring your coffee to your lips, it's like you're looking through him, past his skin, his flesh, something secret inscribed on his bones, embedded into his soul. You know everything, you know everything, you know everything.
The thought itself... surprisingly enough, doesn't appal him.
Hyunjin raises his palm in the air, feeling the autumn prickling against his skin. He waves at you.
Working at a library can be taxing. But it sure has its perks.
You can just about turn the place upside down and put it all back together without getting in trouble. Albeit another reason, besides your profession could be that Minho owns the place. Frankly, he may or may not have been the only cause behind your employment. It's hard to tell now that your co-workers really do recognise you've a knack for arranging things.
But to you, your job is very personal. A precious thing which relieves you from various worldly tensions. Velvety spines under your roughened fingertips, the burst of minted pages hitting your face every time you walk in, your love for reading, for a world of stories is so immense that you think you wouldn't have traded it even if your life depended on it.
For a disease that's not very well known, it's ironic how an entire section of mythology is dedicated to it. Past closing hours, amongst many novels mounted on your desk, you fixate on the one that made most sense. There's a few things you've picked up in common from all of them though — the hanahaki disease is extremely rare, it doesn't affect all those who suffer from the qualms of unrequited love.
Possible remedy according to findings entail
growths can be surgically removed, if the patient consents to eradication of memories of their loved ones.
Clanking of keys alerts incoming and you pause your tapping pen to look up.
"Burning the midnight oil, are we?"
Minho leans against the doorframe, he's half yawning, half talking and fully concerned for you.
"Yeah, looks like I'm gonna be a while." Your monotonous tone provides that you are not paying a lot of attention. You blurt without looking up. "Are you leaving?"
"No, still haven't finished archiving for that Pfizer project...But I'm going to get a bite to eat..." His inky eyes remain on you as his tone falters, "You want anything?"
"I'm fine. Thanks."
"Wow you're like...really uh invested." He tilts his head in thought, "You seeing someone again?"
You know Minho long enough to know he has a teasing side to him, from diaper days to play dates ending in pillow fights because he kept offering you his last Pringle just to pop it into his stupid smirking mouth — but you have no idea where he's going with this.
So you look up, finally. Furrowing your brows.
"No. What does that have to do with anything?"
He shrugs, "I haven't seen you concentrate so hard since you dumped Jeongin."
Your right eye twitches. Because you know exactly what he's referring to, and simultaneously, for the sake of your well-being, you much prefer being in denial. "What?"
"C'mon. Remember how you always ended up doing his homework?" He reminds you. "It's like when you like someone, you go out of your way to do charitable stuff for them. But...this? Too much. Even for you."
You ignore Minho's comment. To the world, Hwang Hyunjin's place in your life is not significant. After all this is the most natural undulation in the vicissitudes of life — for someone who once was your friend to eventually drift apart, to become a has been. It's too hard to explain why you care. After all this time.
"I was just being nice." You narrow your eyes, unimpressed. "Clearly this concept is lost on some people."
"Sure you are, bud. If being 'nice' is synonymous with whipped." Of course, there's a smug grin gracing his pouted lips that tempts you to fling something at him. Not that you can though. Seeing as Minho breaks out into a full fledged sprint, his singsongy voice a thinning echo bouncing off of shelves and windows and doors.
Still somehow his footsteps manage to travel through walls, permeating into your office with such great amplitude that you could be bamboozled into thinking he hasn't left at all. Or maybe you've stopped paying attention, your eyes zoom in on any other helpful detail you can put to use in wrapping your head around what you have witnessed firsthand.
At the same time, you can't really ignore how hungry you're feeling just from the mention of a bite to eat. So when Minho's shadow forms again on the page you've been 'reading' for the last few seconds you sense a gigantic wave of relief washing over you.
"You know what I changed my—" slamming the book shut, you blink against scanty provision of light, with raise your head and a bleary vision, recognise him in an instant. Except...it isn't Minho. "mind..."
The only source of brightness is a small emerald lamp perched on the corner of your desk, light green catches onto one of the ornamented corners and speckles of golden caress his supple skin gently. You hadn't realised how cold it might've been outside until you see how heavily dressed Hyunjin was, a long overcoat worn over woollen sweater, a Santa hat and muffler pulled to his chin. It's no one other than your boss himself who has given him directions to your office, you know this, Hyunjin has never been inside before.
So when he marvels absently, you sense yourself feeling a little self conscious about not cleaning up. All around you, a comforter and love seat pushed against the window, cigarette butts discarded in ashtray and then...the books strewn before you tell him you practically live here.
For some reason, Hyunjin only seems to loosen up at the spectacle.
"Hi." He says finally.
"Hi..." you arrange the reading materials quickly to one side so you can rest your elbows. A small (successful) attempt made to hide your research. "Something up?" You say, but what you really mean is, what are you doing here?!
Did he suspect you were going to tell on him? Right that's it, that must be it, you tell yourself, believing, knowing, of all the years Hwang Hyunjin has known of you he has never been one to care about your whereabouts.
"I just...um," He starts, forwarding his mitten clad hands. It's the back of a crumpled coffee cup on which straight handwriting reads a bucket list...of sorts. You immediately understand that his coming is an act of impulse. Urgency of living every moment like it's slipping through it's fingers, that he just needed to tell the only person who knows, be it by accident.
Hyunjin clears his throat. "I wanna do all this before I die."
In lieu of giving an instant response, baffled, you gawp at him. Despite knowing, hearing Hyunjin say it out loud somehow makes everything...too real.
It's as though someone's reached inside your throat, pulled your heart out and crushed it with their bare hands. Hyunjin, the boy who smelled like fabric softener and skittles and wore power ranger shirts, the boy with the fantastic smile and cold fingers, is dying. You won't let him. You can't let him.
You thumb along the numbers scribbled in hasty penmanship, look up and blink rapidly, "Okay," you say, a small whisper, barely there words. "That's okay."
Even with the hat covering tips of ears, you could tell the same faint blush coating his cheeks had rushed to that particular area. His eyes drift off to the sight of pens discarded inside a wooden holder because he can feel your gaze on him. "and I...I need your help."
"Alright."
Hyunjin's eyes widen to a great degree, he sits straighter, as if he hadn't expected you to comply so quickly.
And honestly? Neither had you.
It's quiet. Awkward.
"You know it's not like I haven't thought about dying. I just figured I'd get to grow old first, settle down, have kids and all that," A wry laugh escapes his parted lips. "Everything's happening too fast."
You hesitate, thinking he's making a mistake. Frankly he shouldn't feel obligated to give you an explanation.
"You...you don't have to tell me."
"No—I mean...can I?" He gives you a sheepish look, disliking his own whimsical tone, somehow endearing still. You find yourself wondering how long he had to keep his burdens to himself, not just pertaining to his illness, but everything. His dreams, his hopes, his fears. Anything which requires a certain amount of depth. And you almost ask him, the question sitting at the tip of your tongue, yet the realisation rather simple, stops you. Maybe you've mistranslated 21 year old Hyunjin all along — moulding himself into someone who's convenient around people who only liked him for who he appeared to be, maybe even with all that popularity, parties and glamour, he's just...lonely.
You push your reading glasses into your hair, press your knuckles under your chin and hum in consent.
He shifts in his seat, "Have you ever... been in love?"
You release an amused huff. Let your eyes linger on him for a long minute.
"Once."
Hyunjin half expects you to laugh. Poke fun at him for his melodramatic backstory. That's the sole reason why he doesn't tell his friends (funny, for people he considers close, they seem to know not much about him or care to know, that is. ). But you... you look at him with something in your eyes that tells him the rubbish reasons he posited makes all the sense in the world. Hyunjin's unsure of the tingle in his gut, why it's happening. But he thinks, just for a second, it feels a little like hope.
 Midnight rendezvous.
As someone who has lived a fairly extraordinary life, Hwang Hyunjin's bucket list is bafflingly ordinary. He's more of a finding joy in small things kind of a person, punctilious at best.
Things change. People notice. They hesitate, whisper about you and last night while you were out on last minute cheap wine run, the grocerer, a girl who looks around sixteen asks you if you're dating Hyunjin. Underneath the thinly veiled curiousity, there's something like anger dripping from her words.
You furrow your eyebrows in simple insinuation that it's weird for a stranger to take interest in your life. Maybe it was written on your face, the fact that you're a dying man's beck and call is for reasons far more complicated than it looks.
You go to his parties. Greet him as a friend would and not just for the sake of maintaining formalities. He comes to the library more times than he does, waits for you to get off work so you can check something off the list at least. People notice. People understand. Hyunjin's different around you. He's bright, talkative when he forgets to contain himself. You sense your heart swelling with pride just at the understanding that he can be himself around you.
You drive to the beach, sit in your trunk and drink straight out of the bottle.
Hyunjin laughs a little. Suspends his feet in the air. With time, he's gotten paler, exhausted. "Rough day?"
You hum.
"Very. Our children's collection is usually low in stock around the weekends."
Hyunjin crosses his arms over his chest. Curious.
"And?"
"And if I say I got yelled at by a toddler would you believe me?"
Hyunjin feigns contemplation, even with the realisation that his body is becoming less and less cooperative, he manages to remain perfectly cheerful.
"I can actually," he grins, "At that age, I was a real pain in the ass."
"Were?"
Your smile is just a slight curl against the bottle's mouth as he grumbles under his breath about your 'insensitive' remark.
You think of your life after Hyunjin, think of his absence like a gaping hole you'll never be able to fill out. It makes you sick to your stomach.
Bake something from scratch.
Hyunjin's face twists in apparent thought, eyebrows rising. A pink tongue poked against his cheek, whilst he chews carefully, trying really hard not to flash an accidental reaction whilst you clasp your butter and oat flour soiled hands together, some of the batter on your cheek, neck to anticipate his answer like your will to live depends on it.
You ask yourself how it got to this. Why you didn't care that you were awake so early on a Sunday morning with flour powdering every kitchen appliance in sight in spite of being awfully restrictive about who you let into your kitchen. But it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter because it's nice like this.
Hyunjin has his hair pulled away from his bare face, a mole under his eye, a small birthmark on the back of his ear.
When you first met, you thought he was a kind of handsome that couldn't be real. Something formidable about it. Only destined to exist behind fuzzy television screens and flashy magazines.
But in retrospect, you realise, that that's not true at all. 
If you look close enough, if you really pay attention, there's a softness underneath, something goofy, something warm, the sharp jut of his nose circling into a soft button, his eyes are big, black and his mouth jutted out into a natural pout, he looks innocent, like he doesn't quite realise the extent of his charms.
"It's..." His soft voice pulls you out of your reverie, and you look up to find his eyes glimmering jovially. Every time it surprises you, the lack of regret in them and the abundance of nonchalance. You wonder what it means to love someone like that, to love someone to the point of martyrdom. It shouldn't be like this. "perfect,"
"This is like, the only batch we didn't burn, right?"
You snort, "Yeah." Fully turn to him, "You know what they say, fifth time's the charm."
Hyunjin's laugh, you think, is so contagious that it makes it an imperative to smile in return. In shaky compartments the sound comes, like being 8, laying wide-eyed in a paddling pool and staring up at a crayon blue sky, raindrop rippling beyond all that noiseless water. His eyes curve to upturned crescents, an unconscious hand covering up the seams of his lips whilst he shakes his head. You don't even notice when he starts speaking again.
"Huh?"
"I said you got a little...something..."
You almost lose a fraction of your sanity when his nimble fingers come to wrap around your wrist while you hold onto the spatula employed into the whole snickerdoodle batter mixing business, a liberated hand coming up to gently wipe your cheek. It means everything to you. And nothing to him.
Later, when you're alone at night, really alone, you put your palm to your chest and feel the unsteady beat of your heart. A warning, a reminder. I can't. I can't. I can't.
You hold Hyunjin's hair up. His hands resting on the cold toilet seat, he's whimpering and bleeding. It happens every time he sees Haseul, or something which reminds him of her. Like the song.
This time she's drunk. And it's because she impulsively rises to her toes and presses a tender kiss to Chan's lips.
Hyunjin's just a feet away, across students and solo cups and streaks of neon falling irregularly through his line of sight.
He can never confess, not to her. The last thing Hyunjin wants is for her to feel bad for him. To say she feels the same as an act of service. He tells you. You understand. Somehow... you always understand.
They met in college, Hyunjin and she. And Chan was an upperclassman who seemed to be good at...well everything. At first, he couldn't figure out why it never occured to him before, the fact they were getting together maybe before, after or during the length of their relationship.
Though the answer is simple.
Hyunjin thinks the pillar to good relationships is trust. Call him a sappy romantic or whatever but he had seen true love manifest from it through generations before him and his parents and their parents. To think a different fate was woven for him...used to be unimaginable.
How ironic is that?
Hyunjin presses his cheek against your chest because he doesn't want you to look at him when he cries.
Then for the first time....he tells you he's scared. He's scared of what will happen to him. Of what is happening to him.
He's falling apart.
You cradle him, press him closer to your body like you're trying to put him together. People can't fix each other. Not really. But sometimes... they're worth the try.
"Hey...hey...it's alright," You shush him, run your fingers through his hair. Your voice almost breaking, faltering. Still this, this you mean it with every fibre of your being. "It's okay to be scared."
Self bleach hair.
It's Christmas and you're late for a late night dinner he's putting together. (As reluctant as he was about getting along with Hyunjin, he seems all too eager to make invite him whenever a get together takes effect.)
His apartment smells like floor cleaner. There's a queen sized bed pushed against an electric blue wall, a Fleetwood Mac poster taped to his door, small reading desk where Canon EOS New Kiss rests, polaroids of things checked off the list littered all its wooden surface.
You pick up the only photo he hasn't labelled, it reminds you that your friendship isn't just based off a pursuit. This is natural. Pizza box discarded between you two, on your roof top. It's a little too dark, you're holding a cigarette between your fingers, you're laughing and Hyunjin looks like he's going to complain the minute he's done taking the picture. (And he does.)
You smile, pressing your fingers against it like the touch could transport you to a simpler time.
"Ready to go?"
Hyunjin rakes a tentative hand through his newly dyed hair, grey (a suitable colour he says.). You can tell he's put a lot of effort into cleaning up, his usual hoodies and sweats alternated with a red satin shirt tucked into dark dress pants and a coat of the same colour.  Hyunjin is beautiful. Perhaps even more like this. In fact, the extent of this quality is so Goliath-like that it obliges dolled up attendees to marvel up in awe.  While you fully agree with their unsaid ponderings, you really do, you find yourself missing a less sophisticated version of him. 
"Yeah, but first..." you fish out a wrapped squarish material from the depths of your pocket. Hyunjin's eyes widen, two bunny-like teeth showing for the extent of his grin.
"You got me a present!" He all but rips it out of your hand, shaking the material eagerly. He’s a Christmas person, a supreme holiday enthusiast if you will. The sheer excitement in him projects itself in every physical aspect possible. Slight jumping on the balls of his feet. "It's a cassette...?"
You speak too much, nervous he doesn't like it. "It’s a Christmas mix. I thought...since you like carols. I know it's a little old school, I'm sorry if that’s not what you were hoping for—"
Hyunjin pulls you into a big hug, wrapping his entire body it feels like; his arms around your waist, he squeezes you tighter against him, "Thank you." He whispers into your hair, it's not just about the cassette, you can tell. 
There's a small light bulb dangling from his ceiling, he hasn't fixed it since the first time you pointed it out. You can tell with your eyes closed, you've begun to know more intimately than your own home. It's safe here. A place that deludes you into thinking that he's not running out of time, that even in his absence in the world, whenever you should walk into this room, it would be an imperative to find Hyunjin lazying about in its confines. Familiarity can be quite tricky, can't it?
His gratitude is not unknown to you. It's in the guilty smile that threatens to show every now and then, it's in this and it's in that. In many ways, it is not something you're a stranger to.
And yet the words manage to tears your heart at the seams. Just a little.
 Make a snow angel.
From above, he imagines, he may appear to look like a chunk of cookie dough in an ice cream pint.
The snow is not as comfortable as it appears, its frigid temperature seeps into Hyunjin's clothes (and what feels like his internal organs, if that's even possible). He waves his hands and legs inward, outward.
Your head tilts towards him. Face twisted in annoyance. "You're getting on my wing!" You say. "Have you no respect for personal space?!"
Hyunjin narrows his eyes jovially. And people tell him he's the one with a penchant for theatrics. He leans closer in rebuttal, waving his leg around your design with more purpose.  You give up. Sit on your knees, fumble with the snow. He’s still in the same position. Smug as ever...
"This is what happens when you disrespect your elders." He fake-warns. "Oka—"
What he doesn't anticipate, however, is the snowball you launch on his stupid grinning face. Now it's your turn to laugh. You clutch your stomach and point at him whilst he glares at you having barely managed to blow the snow off of his mouth.
"Oh, you're gonna get it now!"
You let out an animalistic screech, Hyunjin’s already trapped you under his weight, his thighs wound around your waist, hamstringing your plan to escape, now you're merely squirming. His fingers come down to attack your sides, digging into the flesh so mercilessly to the point you’re not sure if you’re laughing or crying. It's like there's a wildfire inside your lungs.
For a moment you forget, you let yourself forget what's to come.
“Alright, alright I’m sorry!” you press your palms against his chest in an attempt to push him off, Hyunjin has a dumb smile on his face that seems to give the impression of a hanger  stuck inside his mouth. But... there's something behind his entertainment as the sound of his laugh dies down, chest heaving with exercise. His smile drops.
You can count each lash, each freckle and line on his face. The dark in his eyes. The pink of his lips. Your sweater's ridden to your ribs. And the warmth of his fingers shifting against your bare skin hits you with an earthshattering force.
Hyunjin kisses you. For a fleeting second, you freeze. Rigid with shock. Then it passes as soon as it comes.
 You let out a noise of content,indubitably grateful that your neighbours forgot to put on their porch light for the night.  See it’s like this, the act of kissing is not as special as is the person himself, you muse, you can kiss anyone, you can touch and be touched by anyone. But none of that truly compares to this. Not when they aren't him.
You’d be lying if you said you never thought about it. Just like you’ve thought about a lot of things. But just the realisation that the boy you’ve harboured in your heart for more complicated reasons than you disclose, to yourself even, touches you with so, so much care...it’s tearing you apart. 
It’s too good to be real.
You suddenly push him away. The tugging and pulling at your heart too much to handle. For the fact remains — Hyunjin doesn't love you. He doesn't even like you. You never expected him to. Actually, you've never felt what you feel with that condition in mind either.
See when the feeling of having everything you could ever want is cradled between your palms...it ought to be hard to let go. (Maybe he’s just doing this because he feels bad for you, the little voice in your head says. You listen.)
Hyunjin speaks up first.
“I love Haseul.”  he tells you, but it sounds more like he’s telling himself. “That’s why...that’s why, all this...I love her.” Not you.
You swallow, “I know.” Your hands come up to dust your pants. Hyunjin’s still on his knees, as if the answer to his conflicts are deposited under all the snow. “It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not, it’s not okay. I shouldn’t have, I shouldn’t have done—”
Now you hear it, the hint of pity in his voice. You don’t mean to sound as bitter as you do. Seeing as you’re usually very good at keeping calm , breaking that very reputed front frustrates you even more.
“Look just forget about it, okay? We don’t have to talk about this.”
Hyunjin looks like he didn’t expect this side of you to exist. At least, you think, at least it got him to stop talking.
Learn to skate.
"If I fall, I'm taking you with me."
"You say it like I have a choice."
Hyunjin shoots you a warning glare even though you can't see. His choppy skidding steps supported by the vice grip he has on your arms. You haven't skated since you were in highschool. But when you're pretty good at it still, the smooth blade of your beaten skates gliding through ice with much dexterity, it's like floating, freeing, the wind hitting your faces, snow catching in your lashes. It's peaceful, you try not to think about the warmth of Hyunjin's arm circling around body, the vague rhythm of his heartbeat against your back. His laboured breaths on your neck. It's torturous. But spending so much time with him has taught you to hide your feelings better.
The park welcomes a large crowd around holiday season, children with toothless grins, tugging onto their mum's coats, small chin resting onto a parents' head, teenagers moving in together in school uniforms. It's the happiest time of the year. When you move past an elderly couple, they smile and tell you make a wonderful couple.
You're just about to make a correction. This puts you in an awkward position... doesn't it?
But then Hyunjin grins toothily and says, Thank you, like it's the most amusing thing in the world. You ignore the wrenching inside your chest.
Hyunjin leans forward, his plump lips brushing against your ear. "Where did you learn to skate so well?!" There's something like excitement in his kiddish laugh aside from admiration. It's not much of a question as it is an exclamation.
"I am pretty good, aren't I?"
He laughs, doesn't let you go. "Yes, yes...really good."
Out of breath, you slow down, move your feet steadily, careful not to lose balance.
"Oh my God! It is you!"
You raise your head, blink against flakes hindering your vision. Jeongin's voice used to be thinner before. As far as you remember. Now it has a weight to it.
You let out a nervous laugh.
"And it's you..."
Jeongin's eyes travel to the arms around your waist, to the stiffened figure behind you and you immediately liberate yourself. Moving to let Hyunjin use your arm as purchase, you don't fail to notice the pinch in his forehead, a frown on his mouth.
"This is my friend Hyunjin. Hyunjin, this is Jeongin—"
"We used to go out." Jeongin smiles, forwarding his hand, which is returned with an unenthused shake and a demure reply. Hyunjin never speaks to anyone this way, not even people he claims to hate.
The former male looks to you again, "I was, uh... wondering if you'd like to go out for a cup of coffee sometime."
Things between you and him ended amicably at the event of his departure for further studies, which deprives you of awkward tension which is expected when exes meet.
Besides, a cup of coffee never hurt anyone.
Right?
Without thinking, you nod slowly, "Yeah that sounds good,"
"Text me anytime."
"Sure."
 “I'll be out of your hair then," he beams. "It was very nice meeting you too, Hyunjin."
"Right."
Hyunjin, you realise, has released your arm. He leans on barricades fencing along the skating area, smiling briefly. You know it’s wrong...yet you sense that you almost need him to be upset.
Then he tilts his head back towards you, "He seems like a really nice guy," he whispers, genuinely meaning every word. Your heart sinks. "I see the appeal." Underneath the lurid glare of fairy lights brandished overhead, Hyunjin's ash hair glints like it's threaded out of silver. You wonder what he's thinking.
 Watch every Disney movie ever made.
You never end up texting Jeongin back. Just stalling for when you're ready, you tell yourself. Even though that's not true at all.
"This brings back so many memories. My parents used to belt out A Whole New World with me, like every time we watched Aladdin."
Hyunjin wipes his face with the back of his hand, technically you’re not very sure what he’s saying exactly because he’s mumbling into a paper napkin you've  passed over for the umpteenth time. You find yourself picturing a small but happy family of three, of Hyunjin in Scooby Doo pajamas and gap between his teeth. (Contrary to your previous convictions, he hasn't changed all at much, save for the teeth bit. ) It's cute.
He looks to you expectantly. Can't be the only one telling embarrassing stories.
You shrug, "I had a thing for Simba. Let's just say my mum and dad were nice enough to indulge me."
Hyunjin reaches for the remote and pauses the ending credits of Lady and the Tramp. He turns to you fully now, gives you a judgemental stare. "Simba...?" He says, "Like the...lion?"
"What? It's normal to crush on fictional characters, okay?!"
"Okay,sure," Hyunjin snorts, putting a pillow between you and him so you can't kill him. "furry."
A part of you is tempted, obviously. But the much bigger part is more invested in how he looks happier, healthier. You want to think that means something.
Hyunjin invites you over for movie night. It's getting colder and you keep poking him with your cold feet. There's an extra set of blankets in his cupboard, he informs you, he isn't sharing his with you — and that's when you see it.
The deflated pink donut folded to the side, his and yours sharpie inscribed initials on one side. 
"Found it yet?"
You don't even notice when he comes to stand behind you. So the question effectively makes you jump out of your skin. Hyunjin has a bowl of popcorn pressed to his chest, there's a pink hair band holding his hair away from his forehead. For the lack of a answer he takes it on himself to find the source of your silence. As if you've been caught red handed.
You think this is where he'll ask you to leave, that or he'll least scold you or something. You prepare for the worst.
Hyunjin just smiles, it's a big smile that succeeds in bringing out the small dimple indented on the side of his cheek. You've never noticed before. It's kinda weird. Because when it comes to him, your attention hardly ever falters.
"You probably don't remember. That’s from Seungmin's 15th birthday,"
You want to scoff under your breath. All this time you had told yourself that you were the only one to be affected by your estranged friendship growing up. Now...the same logic colours you every bit of ridiculous. 
You blink away, swallowing. Voice solemn.
"I remember." Hyunjin's gaze is heavy on your shoulders. An emotion you can't quite put a finger on crosses his delicate features. It's something between surprise and relief... something else too. You don’t understand it. 
It's disconcerting that he can’t remember the last time he got sick. Not the usual discomfort inside his chest, not the blood, not the thorns or petals. Hyunjin's just gotten so used to it, you know? What if he gets his hopes up for no good reason? What if it just comes back?
There's no possible explanation, he explains over a hasty 3 A.M message he had to leave on your answering machine because he's freaking out.
Then Haseul texts Hyunjin, tells him she misses him. Everything's adding up. Everything's falling into place. This is what he wanted, isn't it? She loves him, she finally loves him back. That must be it. He doesn't know what to say. 
But he tells you, and when he does, it sounds a lot like an apology.
— 
Kiss underneath a mistletoe. 
“Chan and I broke up.” She says it like it’s something he should be happy about. So when he remains quiet, it only prompts her to speak more, fill up the big mighty silences. 
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Look Jinnie, I know I made a mistake, but...can’t you give a second chance? Just this once?”
Hyunjin has thought about this particular moment a lot. Kissing her instead of producing a response, pulling her off of her feet and mumbling of course, of course, of course. Back then, there were little doubts in his head pertaining to her, back then he believed that she was the only one for him. The love of his life at the wrong time, in the wrong place.
Now...something doesn’t feel right. 
The thing about wounds, sometimes, of the heart in particular, is when they close up, it’s hard to make head or tails of the kind of person you become in their wake. Hard to adjust. Like when he suddenly shot up 7 inches in ninth grade, a late bloomer at that, and the weight of his new sneakers felt..odd.
He glances at her and also understands what it’s like to be lonely, the constant need to compensate for it by grasping at the last straw. He used to be in her shoes too. This isn’t any different.  Albeit, he isn’t exactly taken by her presence. Just that he doesn’t know if what he’s doing is right. He looks over your table a few feet away from where he’s standing. Having gone out to take a call. You notice his absence and then from your seat, do your best to locate him. (he thinks of kissing you on a bed of snow, thinks of the sizzle of your skates against ice, thinks of his list on a coffee cup and his pink water donut and it’s okay to be scared. Why did it have to be you of all people, through everything? It’s not really a work of coincidence. Not at all actually.
  Maybe he just wanted it to be you.)
When your eyes do lock...seeing him with his hands in his pockets, her standing beyond the barrier as she tries to say something, you smile, even if it’s a little sad. Hyunjin thinks to the conversation some nights before. Thinks of you reminding him that there's nothing to lose at this point, that he should do what his heart tells him. That it’ll be alright, if he just takes a leap of faith. Hyunjin smiles back. Through the glassy exterior and mini water fountains running down its slanted form. The realisation is not as dramatic as he thought. It’s just late.
 He tears off the false mistletoe decoration glued along the periphery of an arch.
And like always.
He takes your advice.
— 
Cohorts of guests pour into the colossal hotel, heads turning in quiet admiration for bejeweled arches breaking out against buttery white architecture, the roof is impossibly naked, translucent glass baring a starlit sky to your watchful eyes. Showing little mercy to a frail chute held over your head,costumed characters wade through oceans of gossamer, twinkling silver and swaying movements to slow jazz. You prop a heeled foot up on the bar platform, which strangely resembles a pedestal, in a futile attempt to catch your breath, with clammy digits settled atop the risky surface of a marbled counter. A soft voice speaks over the ambience, uttering your name with much care. You lift your head. And there he is.
Jisung is scouring through the Spotify playlist you’ve put together for New Year’s Eve. He’s complaining about the lack of Beyoncé while your friends go around the buffet table. When he calls you, you’re sipping your drink, laughing at something Changbin is saying, his eyes brighten just at the sound of your laugh.  Hyunjin isn’t surprised to see his friend taking a liking of you even though he hardly knows you. That’s just the effect you have on people.
Excusing yourself, you allow him to walk you to a less densely populated area where a stone pillar faces expensive paintings of nameless painters. With the effect of alcohol settling in and your inhibitions effectively lowered, your steps sway a little. You lean against the massive build rising from tiled floor. “So what’s up?” you murmur, the lump in your throat thickening just at the thought of him speaking the good news into existence. “I take it went well?”
 Hyunjin doesn't answer. He looks distracted for a bit. Then in an instant he snaps out of his daze. “What did you mean when you said ‘once’?”
Your brows come together in inquiry.
“What?”
"When I asked you if you have ever been in love, you said ‘once’." He persists, his fingers come up to your shoulder, grazing slightly as if they’re trying to carve out words against the skin. "You weren’t talking about Jeongin.”
He knows. He’s always known. Hyunjin can’t believe he’s been so stupid.
“Took you long enough.” You let out a sardonic laugh.“Well, it doesn’t matter now, does it?”
"It matters to me..." Hyunjin sounds offended, you gather, but he manages to quell his temper for the sake of coaxing your confession. Is he purposely embarrassing you?  "I don’t think...I love Haseul anymore...I didn’t realise...I haven’t for a long time."  
A big chandelier beams over withering plants pushed against the ceiling, in this poor supply of light, you can tell exactly how he looks, eyes glimmering adoringly, you've spent something-teen years of your life wondering what it's supposed to mean. And it still manages to confuse you.
"Why are you telling me this?" you ask, albeit you already know.  Because funnily enough, before he got his braces removed and dyed his hair a scandalous blonde, before bucket lists and heartbreak, he was just the boy who told you he liked your stupid reindeer sweater even though it had officially made you the 7th grade laughing stock. You remember being fifteen and in love with Hyunjin. And you've never actually stopped. You need to hear it to believe it.
It drives you crazy. The way Hyunjin brushes his fingers against your cheek, shifting strands away from your eyes. But you can't help it, you've always wanted this. You lean into the caress, peering up at him as his large hand cups your jaw, thumb traversing from your tilted chin to your glossy lips like he's trying to smooth out all the creases. His voice is small, a whisper.
"Because I need you to know I think I’m falling in love with you.” he says. His palm opens and there’s a plastic mistletoe nestled between his fingers. You’re smiling and sniffling whilst his forehead comes to press against yours. Hyunjin grins. “And there’s still one last item on my list.”
“Are you seriously asking me to land one on you now?”
“Oh hell yeah.”
— 
"Move."
You press your fingers against the slick, sweaty skin.
In rebuttal, Hyunjin grumbles under his breath. Only half awake, half aware that he was mumbling in his sleep. His naked chest seems to be, if it’s even possible, glued to your bare front as he sprawls out like a starfish over your body, using his gangly arms to accommodate the strange position.
Though and you know he knows it too — it’s anything but uncomfortable.
See by now, you aren't exactly a stranger to Hyunjin's sleeping habits. Or really, any habits of his.
All the windows are cracked open, moonlight percolating through a thin sheet of curtains in rendering evidence that it’s still night time. You can make out the faint sound of  honking in the distance, a few stray dogs here and there, probably producing strings of complaints about the blatantly unbearable heat.
The strong stench of sweat and an aftermath of what happened before is a quick reminder of where you are, what you’re doing and that your arm’s going cold for a lack of circulation under his weight. Beads of sweat collected against his skin and trickle down the side of your face, the crook of your neck, which only prompts you to apply more force to the pads of your index and pointer — albeit it did nothing to move him, "Gross." You groan. "You're sweating like a pig!"
This comment, of all the things you've tried to get him to sleep on his side, succeeds in making Hyunjin raise his head, his grey hair matted down, a few rogue strands pushed out to fall over the unamused look in his eyes.
In an unprecedented minute of absolute clarity, something inside your stomach started to churn at the shocking sight. You’re impossibly, absolutely and nauseatingly in love with Hwang Hyunjin and the funny thing is, you don’t have to think twice to know he is too.
"Gross?" Hyunjin lowers his face to brush his pouted lips along your jaw, grinning when you let out a shaky but involuntary breath and as if he is looking to make a point with his digits traversing from your bare stomach, just along the hem of your underwear,   "After all that?"
"I hate you." You say — but more like, stutter. The sound of his giggles eliciting a strange sensation in you, reverberating against your chest, knocking against his ribs and your skin, like it’s trying to reach out to you, like your bodies insist on melding into one.
"I don’t think you’re being honest, baby." He laughs, squeezing your side, coming up to plant a warm palm to your butt to repeat the action, which in turn, drew a mewl from you. “Because you looove me.” Hyunjin smirks, his finger thumbing along your throat to your chin. You think this is what all those great poets meant in endless litanies of lovers torn apart by time and war woven together in a simple caress, like a longing, like a secret. Guarded from prying eyes, greedy hands, and you keep it, you keep it. For him. With him.
963 notes · View notes
haletwinsstan · 3 years ago
Note
top 5 favorite (dutch) foods?
Oooooh okay so Dutch foods top 5
1. Stroopwafels (if you eat these you HAVE to put them on top of a hot drink cause the caramel melts a little 11/10 experience)
2. Hagelslag, it's chocolate sprinkles but you eat them on bread it's literally the best idea ever you can have chocolate for breakfast and no one will look at you weird
3. Boterkoek (literally translates to buttercake and it's the like creamiest thickest cake-ish thing ever it's GREAT)
4. Speculaas, which is a biscuit with a bunch of spices in them BUT they make like a thicker version filled with an almond paste and that's the version I would kill a man for honestly
5. Stamppot, SPECIFICALLY pumpkin stamppot, the concept is just mashed vegetables (we love northern european cooking don't we) but my family makes it with pumpkin and then cheese in it and it's AMAZING
Send me top 5 anything!
6 notes · View notes
likesomekindofcheese · 4 years ago
Note
Hey, you said to flood you with requests and stuff, so here I go. Reader is Grigor's wife (he deserves so much better than what he got on the show) and just gave birth to their first child, a daughter. Everyone pities Grigor because he doesn't have an heir to carry on the Dymov name, but he adores his little princess and spends every free moment with reader and their little girl. Thanks in advance!
Sophie!!! This is so cute!!! I’m uwuing and yearning and crying at the same time!! Get ready, this might be a huge-ass blurb!!!!
 tw: swearing and mentions of sex and childbirth and children
Tumblr media
Letting out a breath, you finally heard your baby cry. Sweat dripped over your face, your hair was a mess, and worst of all, there was half of the court watching to see it from over your legs. You began heaving in big gulps of air, relieved it was finally over. You had sweated over your shift and felt that you might as well be naked in front of the whole court.
They fanned themselves, sipping champagne as you heard the doctor cut the umbilical cord. A physician changed bedsheets beneath you.
“Ooof, all that blood,” Count Orlo commented, putting a handkerchief into his hand and keeping it close to his mouth.
“Yes, well, that’s the way it is…” Lady Svenska said with a shrug.
Turning over, you saw Grigor’s face. He looked faint, green. He was uneducated about what happened during childbirth but insisted if the court wanted to watch he had to be there too. And watching the extremities of the female body firsthand made him tremble. But his hand never left yours throughout the long hours of labor.
“Are you…are you alright, Y/N?” he asked worriedly.
“I…I’m tired…but I’m fine…” you said.
He kissed your cheek, “I’m so proud of you, no matter what…”
The crowd gathered around like chickens as the doctor and nurses cleaned the baby. But you knew there was the one thing they wanted to know. Even more than the baby’s health. Your own heart was beating hard. You heard water swishing as they washed the child.
Then the bundle was handed to the physician in a soft, white blanket. Catherine caught a glimpse of the little one’s new face and she gave a beautiful smile. Then looked up at you, mouthing “congratulations.”
The doctor finally handed it over to you. The baby was alive and breathing.
“Monsieur and Madame Dymov, you are now the parents of a healthy…”
“Thank god…” you blurted.
“A healthy...beautiful little girl…” he finished.
He gave you the bundle and you made out the red, squished face. She was so tiny. She looked almost nothing like and everything you expected. Grigor kept gawking at her.
But there was a silence around the court. You glanced up to see a few curled frowns and whispers. Only the Empress came by to speak to you. She gave a glance at the little one’s face and wished her dearest blessing on your little family before waltzing off.
The tiny hands began to move sporadically. Then he let out a huge grin, a half-laugh came from him. He turned to you, his blue eyes looking large.
“I…I’ve never been so…so…”
“So completely in fucking trouble…”
His head shot up.
“Peter! I…I didn’t see you!” He said. His legs stopped, he stayed by your side, holding the little babe.
Peter walked up and gave him a pat on the back. You gritted your teeth.
“I guess congratulations are in order. She didn’t die…but you don’t have an heir to the Dymov name, title, estates, property, or money! Grigor…”
“Uh, well…I…” Grigor sputtered, blinking between his friend and you with the baby.
“I guess Y/N is a complete failure even after she’s had a good fuck!” he continued.
Tears began to well up in spite of his presence and dipping your head down so only your baby saw you tear up.
“Come on, Peter!... and speaking of come, I have more reason to rejoice…” Grigor jested, wiggling his eyebrows lasciviously.
“Humph?”
“More chances to fuck a boy into Y/N, of course! I’ll be enjoying my cock with her every night from now on! By next month, she’ll hardly be able to walk down the hall!” he explained cheerfully, taking Peter by the shoulders and shaking him.
“Why, huzzah! You are optimistic my friend!” he praised, “And I am glad the child’s healthy…for now. You never know. Girls are weak, anyway…that one might drop dead of her own blood when she’s twelve! Now I need to drink some wine for dinner and get a cock-sucking for dessert, goodbye!”
He whisked around and left, you breathed a sigh of relief.
“Grigor…are you really disappointed?” you questioned. “I…I’m afraid I…I have failed you…” you found yourself crying. 
The feeling of now emptiness in your belly. The hormones. The experience. Everything came down.
“No…no, Y/N…I love her…I love…our daughter. Our girl. And she’s healthy. That’s all I could ask for…you have not and will never fail me and right now…”
He took your hand and kissed it.
“I love you more than ever…” he confessed.
Smiling, you reached in to “Can I…can I hold her, now?” Grigor asked.
Nodding, you handed the cooing baby over to him.
His jaw dropped as he accepted her. You showed him how to cradle her neck and her bum safely to hold her.
“I’m so fucking nervous, what if I drop her!” he confessed.
“You won’t! Sit on the bed if you’re that nervous!” you offered, weakly shifting aside.
When you handed the tiny girl over to your husband, she began to wriggle. His lips went tight.
“Ah! She already feels heavy! Now she’s moving! She’s minutes old and won’t sit still!” he commented.
“Relax, Grigor…” you urged.
Eventually, she settled down and you had a few first quiet moments. She even opened her eyes to Grigor. And you saw him cry silently.
The next week was thrilling and exhausting. Yet every night, once you heard your daughter wail, Grigor was out of the bed like a shot. You would shift up, but he put a hand in front of you to stop you.
“Here, Y/N…get some sleep…” he ordered.
“But…”
“I didn’t push a fucking baby from my crotch a few days ago! Get some sleep!”
He always insisted on heading over and caring for the little one.
Though, sometimes she was hungry, only then would he wake you up to suckle. He then made sure that a pot of tea was prepared and some kind of cake, biscuit, dessert, or even something like slices of apple and toasted bread. But it was peaceful, the dark night with low lights in your shared, red bedroom. The sound and feel of her mouth on your nipple as she sucked. And Grigor watching as he took care of your empty plate, sipping his tea thoughtfully. But with a quiet smile.
One night, you placed her back on her blanket so you could finish your tea. He even looked at you and said, “I thought…I would like to name her after you, Y/N…”
“I…really?” you asked.
He nodded, “I want her to grow up and to be like you…because you’re the best woman I’ve ever known…and the christening is in two days and that’s the only name I can come up with.”
“Well, alright, it’ll be odd for me, we can call her Mademoiselle Dymov if we get confused.
But he kept playing with the baby every free hour. He held her in her robe and went to mirrors. Pointing at her in the reflection, as she cooed in response.
“Who is that? Who is that! It’s little miss Y/F/N! And isn’t she beautiful!” he cheered.
He kept holding the little girl up to his face and she would reach for him. Playing with his cheeks, lips, and especially his nose until he burst out laughing. She developed a habit of sucking on his nose that he would let her do for several minutes until you couldn’t stop laughing. But he smiled all through it.
The next month, he insisted on a room to be a nursery for the little Mademoiselle. But you were surprised to find every kind of flower, bow, dolly, decoration, and animal toy in there. He was even dressing the little girl already in a tiny blue dress made of silk.
“Why…don’t you look stunning, Princess Y/F/N! I chose that color because that was what your mother wore the day I met her…did you know that?” he whispered, fixing a little bonnet on her head. She babbled in response.
Quietly walking behind, you cleared your throat, and he turned around with a jump.
“I think we’re going to give the Dauphin of Versailles a run for his money with this nursery alone!” you laughed. “She’ll start thinking she is the dauphin of Versailles!”
He grinned, showing you the baby in her new dress.
“Why it’s what she deserves as my daughter!” he answered with his handsome smile.
Although he would go to the Emperor as called, many an evening was spent in front of the roaring fireplace on a cold night holding little Y/F/N or having her in a nearby cradle as you played cards or read, though either your hand or his would reach up to touch or tickle her.
One evening, it was his turn to read. You sat by the fire, holding the little Mademoiselle right over your arms but low on your lap. She looked up at you, laughing at something and you looked down and grinned back. Grigor stopped reading. You caught him looking
“What is it?” you asked quietly.
“I’m just…happy here, with both of my women…that’s all…I never knew I could be so at peace but…here it is…” he commented, before walking up to kiss you on the lips.
The Great Taglist: @foxinaforestofstars @itsametaphorgwil  @grigorlee​ @itsametaphorgwil​ @always-a-fairycat​ @foxinaforestofstars​ @simonedk​ @i-wished-upon-a-star-one-night​ @queenlover05​ @xviiarez @kiainspace​ @gwilymleeisbae​ @writeroutoftime​ @staradorned​ @iwritefanficnotprophecies​ @panagiasikelia​ @marshmxllowfluf​  
95 notes · View notes