#I literally haven’t written anything in like 7 years now lol
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Elliott fucked up.
He just wanted to give him the world. Everything good in his broken brain screamed at him to not go through with it, but how could he say no to Astarion when this meant so much to him? What if he didn’t want to be with him anymore? What would even be the point of going on? Astarion trusted him. How could he not do whatever he needed, no matter the cost? So he helped him. He watched and smiled as Astarion carved the Infernal into his old master’s back, the pathetic gutteral cries more beautiful than any ballad. He put the other victims from his mind. He couldn’t let himself think of them.
He’ll never forget what he did to them. Things would never be the same, and he didn’t even deserve them to be. He probably knew right away that Astarion would never look at him the same way again, but he couldn’t let himself believe it. He would just have to try harder and be more obedient. He’d let Astarion make him his spawn, and help him take over the world. He’d do whatever Astarion wanted. Anything to see that easy smile again, the one reserved special for him.
#bg3#Elliott x Ascended Astarion#Durge x ascended astarion#durgestarion#I literally haven’t written anything in like 7 years now lol#I’m so rusty but these two make me need to write things down!!!#plz be nice to me 🥺#This is my first time ascending Astarion and it’s been roughhhh and honestly a bit triggering lol#but I loveeee the angst and it’s HOT#They’re so toxic 😩#Is this fanfiction?#is this a one shot?#I honestly dont know
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Fic Writer Interview
thank you sweet and lovely jessie @metalheadmickey for the tag!
1. How many works do you have on AO3? 14, how did that happen?
3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? reckoner, conflict of interest, the sleepover, change like shifting shadows, strangers on a train
4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? yes, but lately it takes me a month or two lol. i love comments
5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? i don't think i've written anything with a particular angsty ending!
6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? i think most of my fics have happy endings (heh)
7. Do you write crossovers? no and i probably won't. there isn't a show i'm obsessed with enough to write a crossover with
8. Have you ever received hate on a fic? yeah quite a few. i'm a misogynist, a racist, a bored digital housewife. lmao. i turned off anon comments because i got tired of it and writing fic should not be a negative experience!
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yes, all kinds. loving smut, dirty smut, kinky smut, a/b/o. it's not solely what i write, i enjoy smut and plot!
10. Have you ever had a fic stolen? i also hope not
11. Have you ever had a fic translated? no
12. Have you ever co-written a fic before? yes! with @breedxblemickey and our strangers on a train series. it's so fun to write with bree!
13. What’s your all-time favorite ship? guess!
14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? i really want to finish all of my WIPs, even if it will take me years (literally). i'd like to finish nightwatch but realistically i'm not sure if i ever will because i'm focused on other projects.
15. What are your writing strengths? depends on the fic. in reckoner, for example, i think it's plot, suspense, and bipolar disorder. in change like shifting shadows, it's all about inner turmoil. i like writing dialogue and saying things without saying them, if that makes sense.
16. What are your writing weaknesses? exposition - big same jessie! i write in the exposition after haha
17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? i don't speak any other languages so i won't personally but i don't mind it in other fics.
18. What was the first fandom you wrote for? queer as folk! i was so mad b/j didn't end up together i wrote a reunion fic (now i'm like, wtf justin was a baby haha)
19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to? none at the moment!
20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? reckoner! it's fun, reckless, feral, suspenseful, complex, and i have so many more plans for it. it's not everyone's cup of tea but obviously it has all the tropes i love packed into one very long fic. i'm a little more than halfway through. i just wrote a little bit today!
sorry if you're done it, i haven't been on tumblr too much over the holidays! tagging @gallawitchxx @palepinkgoat @captainjowl @juliakayyy @ianandmickeygallavich @howlinchickhowl @crossmydna @mmmichyyy
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2, 4, 7, 8, 12, 20, 21, 24, 27, 30
a character whose POV you’re currently exploring
Currently, I’m exploring Nobody’s POV because writers block!! has struck!! and it has struck hard!!
I guess Artham Wingfeather? Before writers block came about, I was working on a couple fics about him :) It’s been fun and tricky to explore a new character!
a story idea you haven’t written yet
*stares longingly at my completely filled up notebook* Do you even want to know…
Seriously, most of my story ideas are unwritten—and this is coming from the girl who has over 100 WIPs. I am overwhelmed please.
I have a vague vague vague idea for a crimeboys timeloop fic, but I don’t really know where to begin for that. Perhaps someday the story will work itself out.
your preferred writing fonts
Honestly as long as it’s not Times New Roman 😭
I really don’t pay much attention to the names of fonts though. Whatever’s the default font on whatever writing software I’m using, I’ll typically just go with.
if you had to write a sequel to a fic, you’d write one for…
I’m assuming this means published fics, so! I Was Nothing But A Kid Who Couldn’t Understand!!! THAT ONE!!! I’m actually working on a sequel! Well. I’ve. been working on it. for like… over a year. ish.
The problem is that the sequel is multi-chaptered, and I am not too great with multi-chapter fics. I’ve written four chapters so far (which… well dang!! that’s a little impressive!!) but the plan is for there to be twelve chapters + an epilogue. I’ve been wanting to actually sit down and come up with an outline for the rest of the fic, but I keep forgetting to do that. I do know just how it’s gonna end though!!
Gosh Kidbur is so freakin fun to write. I’m not even kidding he is literally so so so much fun. He’s such a great little guy. Oh my gosh.
a trope you’re really into right now
*gestures at writers block with shaky hands* n-nothing? :( I have been thinking about Ghostbur lately though. Does. Does he count as a trope.
in what year did you publish your first fic?
2021!! Fanfiction.net babyyyyy. I’d been writing fanfiction for years before I published any though.
do you ever worry about public reaction to what you’re writing? how do you get past that?
Yes! Yes I definitely do! Mostly with Ghostbur fics, quite honestly; he’s not nearly as popular as Wilbur or Tommy or Phil (<—other dudes I’ve written about) and my A03 stats… definitely make that clear lol. I try not to mind it, and most of the time I really don’t care, but it… is kinda discouraging. Y’know? The ghost deserves so so so so so so so soooooo many fans I’m not even kidding. Why must he be so very discarded by fandom :(((
Also lately I’ve been a bit nervous about me branching out & writing for The Wingfeather Saga. I know that most of the people subscribed to me on A03 did not subscribe to me for Wingfeather fics, and I just don’t want them to think I’ve moved on from the fandom—because I have not!!! More Dream SMP fics will show up, hopefully soon!!
I haven’t posted any Wilbur fics since the whole situation occurred, and I honestly haven’t been too worried about that at all, but… eh. I’ll probably feel on-edge when I post a Wilbur fic next. I know that some people have been weird about the whole thing.
How have I gotten past these things? Ah… I haven’t 😅 I just try not to think about it all too much, which does help!
how do you recharge when you’re not feeling creative?
Focus on other things besides writing!!! I have learned the hard way that trying to make myself write has made me avoid/dislike anything that I end up writing. Which sucks on a number of levels.
I read, do music, spend time on tumblr, chat with friends, so on. I take a break from writing until the Motivation returns. It tends to work out.
That being said, I’ve been in writers block for probably a month now, and at this point I just miss writing. I really do.
your favorite part of the writing process
Being able to see every little scene of my stories inside my mind :) It’s like a movie but Better because they have GHOSTBUR IN THEM!!! AS WELL AS OTHER THINGS THAT I QUITE LIKE!!!
Writing is a very… I guess visual thing for me, because I really do imagine & see everything in my mind, playing out like a movie. Being able to run away from this world for a little while and spend time in so so many different worlds, filled with different people and scenery and weather and sounds and sensations and emotions… it’s amazing. It’s so amazing, and being able to experience that every time I write something is incredible.
share a fic you’re especially proud of
Better Than a Painting, Because Paintings Aren’t Perfect. This is one of the (relatively few) stories of mine that I have quite positive feelings over, even after months or years of it being published. With most of my stories I just post them and then don’t look at them again, and for others I post them and then grow negative feelings towards them. But for this fic, along with a handful of others, I still… like them. A lot :)
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hi bb hope yr doing well? can you do a 127 reaction where the reader tells them she needs to talk to them / tell them smth & she starts crying but it’s becos she’s confessing that she was in love w them? like she was nervous LOL and they comfort her ofc ehe smth fluffy,,???
surprisingly, I’m in a good mood lol. I hope you’re doing good as well ^^
god I haven’t written reactions in like five years shsjdhs I hope you like it, love. tysm for requesting 💖
summary: you're finally about to confess to your crush of god-knows-how-long but your nerves get the best of you.
pairing: nct 127 x reader
genres: fluff, humour, crushes to lovers
warnings: none except for a lot of cursing lol
word count: 0.7k
note: these reactions are based on my interpretation of the boys' personalities so I'm sorry if this disappoints you
requests are open
taeyong:
concerned bubu™
honestly thought you were gonna tell him you had a terminal illness or something
conducts an impromptu therapy session
“what’s been going on in your life?” “mhm, and how does that make you feel?”
when you finally manage to tell him that you like him he looks so done with you
“I like you too y/n but you didn’t have to cry tf”
taeil:
literally doesn’t know what to do/say
just wraps you in a hug and goes, “I promise you, nothing could ruin our friendship.”
which makes you cry harder bc holy fuck taeil is such a sweetheart :(
squeezes your hand and encourages you to continue speaking
“go on, there’s nothing to be afraid of.”
gives you a big kiss and can’t stop smiling as he does it because he also has the fattest crush on you
johnny:
turns into your personal hypeman, “y/n, babe, you’re the baddest bitch alive and don’t you DARE let anyone tell you otherwise”
isn’t focused on what you’re trying to say, just wants you to feel better
so he’s completely thrown off-guard when he’s scooping out ice cream for you and you go, “so yeah...I have a huge crush on you”
ice cream is now on the floor
“BITCH I THOUGHT YOUR GRANDMA DIED OR SMTH”
“wait where are we going?” “ice cream parlour for our first date. you’re paying.”
yuta:
“just breathe, okay? take as much time as you need.”
ends up cancelling his plans bc he’s really worried
starts coming up with ways to hide the body cause he’s convinced you killed someone
honestly isn’t surprised when you confess, you were being so obvious these past few months
now he’s kinda mad cause he cancelled on father-son bonding time with shotaro
“MY POOR BABY IS GONNA THINK I HATE HIM”
doyoung:
half “noooo my lil baby please don’t cry” and half “well this is awkward”
he’d probably want to impress you and seem like really chivalrous and shit
holds your hand and comforts you or gives you his jacket if you guys are outside and it’s cold
is a bit awkward but really happy when you confess to him
expect to get teased constantly
“hi this is my s/o y/n, did you know they cried while confessing to me?”
jaehyun:
okay it’s so ironic that I just wrote a hurt/comfort fic w jae but pFFT this boy does nothing
gives you blank stare, and on a good day, he might even nod encouragingly
there’s a chance he’ll hold your hand, rub your back or do some action that’ll comfort you, but that’s it
jaehyun just strikes me as the type to be quiet and let you say what you have to before reacting
gives you a cute smile and a kiss on the cheek after the words, “I really like you” leave your mouth
he laughs, feeling relieved it wasn’t something bad and actually finds it cute when he thinks about it later
jungwoo:
like jae he just feels like he wouldn’t really say something aside from some words of encouragement
if he feels like you’re really upset he might try to make you laugh
“you don’t have to tell me right now”
can’t help but laugh at you when he finds out you were just nervous to confess
cuddles afterwards while watching your favourite movie/show to help you calm down (netflix and chill 🥴)
he might joke about it later but not as much as hyuck and doodoo
mark:
panics and gives you a fucking bro hug
awkward back patting and all
literally the most awkward interaction ever cause you’re too scared to confess and he’s too scared to do anything that might upset you further
“dude it’s all good, just like, chill bro. you know you can tell me anything bro”
you manage to stop crying but only cause you’re laughing at how terrified mark looks
you end up confessing to him mid laugh and honestly all he does is just stare at you
mark: *ten minutes later, telling jungwoo the whole thing* anyway so I think I have an s/o now idk I’m still very confused
haechan:
hyuck gives me “imma annoy you into feeling better” vibes
“stop doing that thing with your face you look ugly” “stfu I’m literally crying”
at some point you stop crying and start beating his ass with a pillow
“okay now that you’re back to being murderous instead of a depressed lil bitch what’s up?”
tries to act smooth when you tell him but he’s honestly ecstatic because he has liked you for literally the longest time
like doyoung, he will make fun of you 24/7. actually scratch that, he’s even worse than doyoung
let’s just say he’s lucky that he’s cute
© dreamyyang, 2021
#👾 :: requested#nct#nct 127#nct fics#nct fluff#nct angst#nct x reader#nct 127 x reader#nct x gender neutral reader#nct 127 x gender neutral reader#taeyong x reader#taeil x reader#johnny x reader#yuta x reader#doyoung x reader#mark x reader#jaehyun x reader#nct reactions#haechan x reader#nct imagines#jungwoo x reader#nct 127 angst#nct 127 reactions#nct 127 fluff#nct 127 imagines#nct 127 x you#nct x you#kpop reactions
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Ack! I’ve done been tagged! Thank you, @mister-eames you lovely human!
Send me a number for an excerpt from a draft!
(FYI these are all the things in my drafts right now. Some, obviously, have more written than others)
1. Here We Are, Born to be Kings, We’re the NSFW Paint Shop AU (because, like the Highlander, it will never die).
Summary: Eames is the owner of a store that sells paint. To set it apart from any other paint store - and other paint in general - the paint is given very NSFW names. For example, it’s not just Seafoam Green, it’s Frothing at the Gash. It’s not just Coral Pink, it’s Cunning Linguist Coral. All the old familiar characters work there, naturally. Cobb and Mal are married. Arthur and Eames are together, but “secretly.” (that’s in quotes because they think they’re sneaky but literally everyone knows. Even some customers.) Yusuf and Ariadne have pined for each other for years, but Yusuf’s too shy to make a move. Saito, a regular customer, has become quite taken with the newest hire - college student Robert. Numerous shenanigans due to ensue.
2. Big Gay Jewish Wedding
Summary: Arthur and Eames are getting married! But there are issues on both sides that need working out. On Arthur’s side, it’s wrangling his ginormous family, who all have their own feelings about how this event should go. On Eames’ side, it’s dealing with his not-so-supportive parents. A mix of comedy and drama set to ensue.
3. The Grace Project
Not really anything to summarize here - it’s merely a concept right now. But the simplest explanation is that I’m gonna listen to Grace, by Jeff Buckley, and write whatever Cherik story ideas come to mind. Might end up a continuous story, might be an anthology of one-shots. Your guess is as good as mine!
4. Cherik Mpreg Universe mid-quel
Summary: Charles’ third pregnancy is absolutely awful, culminating in the worst thing any pregnant person or couple can ever experience. After, he and Erik pick up the pieces of their lives, and make choices regarding the further expansion of their family.
5. Original epic fantasy ‘verse
Can’t say much about this one! Partly because it’s not a fanfic, but also because the worldbuilding is exhausting, lol. But here are a few keywords: Magic! Dragons! Swords! Coming-of-Age!
6. Mermaid Horror story
Summary: A crew of sailors is paid by some unscrupulous business man to catch a mermaid and deliver it to him. They manage to find one and capture it. The mermaid proceeds to gradually kill every single member of the crew (The Little Mermaid lied to you - mermaids are damn scary, yo), save one. Also doubles as a very twisted love story… Haven’t decided on whether to make it a fic or an original short story.
7. Coffee Shop/High School Bully AU
Inspired by a post I saw here (that’s in my queue somewhere, lol). Arthur is an oft-bullied student who works part time at the local coffee shop. Eames is one of his bullies, and has been for years, even prior to high school. But a lot can change in four years…
8. Princess Bride AU
Exactly what it says on the tin. Princess Bride. Eames as Westley. Arthur as Buttercup. Other characters in other roles. Framing story is Grandpa Arthur telling the story to his grandchild.
9. Cherik Slow-Dancing Fic
Newest addition. I talked about that Cherik fic I wanted to write for years, and after posting the idea, I started thinking of ways to start. I haven’t written anything down yet, and it’s probably on the furthest back burner right now, but the seeds have been sown at least.
*heavy breathing* I think that’s all of them? Lots to do, lots to do! The Paint Shop AU is the current focus, but any time I feel inspiration I’ll add to the others. I might not have much to say on a few, but if you were to ask, I could probably share a few plot points? Stuff that will eventually happen when the story gets focused on.
Not sure who exactly to tag? I know a few people I follow have done this (or something similar) already? So I guess if you read this and want to do it, consider yourself tagged!
#i love getting tagged in things#lol#works in progress#an eclectic mix#some cherik#some inception#some original#writing is so hard yo
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I read the meta you reposted about anyone being able to become a hero, and I would just like to give some thoughts. I agree it is wrong to think in terms of good vs bad victims and measure everyone as the same. Just because Shoto never killed anyone in response to his abuse and Toya did doesn't mean that Toya was always an evil person looking for an excuse to break bad. Different people break from different things.
these are all good, well-reasoned points, anon, but I disagree with a few of them. let me try to explain.
so the thing about this whole atonement process is that it’s hugely complex, and there isn’t really any kind of roadmap for Endeavor to follow when it comes to trying to make things right. I actually appreciate that his arc is written in such a way that his epiphany doesn’t just happen all at once, and you can see how his approach gradually turns from one that’s still mostly selfish and centered on him, to one that’s actually focused on his kids and what they need. you can see the stages he progresses through as the series goes on.
1. I’d argue that it all starts when he first gets yelled at by Deku (“Todoroki isn’t you!”). he realizes that maybe this kid has got a point, and that treating his son as an extension of him rather than as his own person might just be sorta shitty. so he files that away, but we don’t really see much of a change in him yet.
2. then a few months later he gets thrust into the #1 hero role, which has the interesting psychological effect of forcing him to see past himself and his ego for perhaps the first time in his life. he suddenly finds himself in this position as the new Symbol, and starts to feel the responsibility of that, and it basically triggers the entire rest of his redemption arc. because once he starts looking outside himself, he starts to realize the impact his actions have on other people, including his family. for the first time, he starts looking at the situation with fresh eyes, and realizes how much he’s hurt them.
3. quick little detour here, I feel like it’s important to note that Endeavor -- like many abusers -- actually does love his family and never intentionally set out to hurt them. but the problem is that he is so self-centered for most of his life that he never stops to consider that his family and his kids don’t simply exist to serve his own purposes. he abuses Shouto during his training but I’ll bet you he himself never thought of it as actual abuse, just him being hard on him in order to toughen him up. he thinks he’s doing what’s best for Shouto by making him strong in the hopes that he’ll one day surpass All Might, because that’s always been his goal, and so he just unilaterally decides that should be Shouto’s goal too. he wants the best for him, but it never enters his mind to consider that his son is his own person who, gasp, might not actually want the same things that Endeavor wants. btw I should clarify that absolutely none of this excuses anything he does, holy shit. but I feel like it’s important to mention, because many people complain that the change in Endeavor happens too abruptly and is too unrealistic, but I don’t think that’s true at all. it’s just that people don’t like to acknowledge that abusers are still human (meaning that anyone can become one if they’re not careful to consider how they treat others). Endeavor’s actions are monstrous, but they stem from realistic places, and I think that it’s a very well-thought-out character arc.
4. and so basically, once that change finally starts happening, it’s not that he suddenly starts loving his kids all of a sudden out of nowhere. it’s that he finally starts loving them for their own sake, rather than his. for the first time, he starts loving them selflessly rather than selfishly. and it’s not a change that just happens overnight, because he is so used to everything revolving around him that even after he starts realizing what he’s doing wrong, it still takes him a while to break free from those patterns.
5. and so for example, he suddenly becomes wildly supportive of Shouto and his training and attempts to go full-blown helicopter parent. because clearly that’s what Shouto needs, right?? all those years he was trying to make him into his own personal mini-me rather than loving his son for who he was and supporting him as his own person. and so we see him hounding Shouto in texts to let him teach him his Ultimate Technique (but not because he wants him to surpass All Might, but because he just wants him to be the best hero he can be! it’s different now!), and attending his training sessions to cheer him on from the stands like an obnoxious soccer mom. and afterwards he tells him he’s proud of him, and that he wants to become someone Shouto can be proud of.
6. so you can see there’s some progress at this point, but at the same time he’s still making a lot of the same mistakes. his intentions by this point have genuinely changed! but he’s still looking at the situation from his own point of view, and not taking into consideration how his son feels about the forced attempts at reconciliation. he’s thinking ‘I was a shit father, I need to make it up to him by being supportive.’ but he doesn’t stop to consider that Shouto might not WANT his support by this stage in the game; that he might, in fact, not want anything to do with him at all.
7. and this doesn’t change until after his battle at Fukuoka, when he has dinner with his family and Natsuo blows up at him. he basically lays it all out on the table, but this is the most important part:
I am willing to bet that he did not, in fact, get it until pretty much that moment, actually. because up until this point, he’s been doing exactly as Natsuo said -- trying to make nice, trying to show that he’s changed, and to be a good father now. but he doesn’t stop to consider (a) just how much hurt he really has caused them, and (b) just how impossible it is to simply erase all of that. the pain Natsuo’s expressing here isn’t something people can simply get over. and I don’t think Enji realizes until this moment that he was still going about this in the wrong way.
8. and that, lastly, is what finally leads to this:
he finally realizes that it’s not about him. and apologizes, but makes it clear that Natsuo does not have to forgive him, and that he doesn’t want to burden him by making him feel otherwise. he acknowledges Natsuo’s feelings, acknowledges the pain he’s caused, and realizes that what he and the others need is space. and this is when he makes the decision to build the new home for them and Rei, so that they can finally start to move on -- without him, if that’s what it takes.
so this is basically the progression of Endeavor’s redemption arc up to this point. and I’m sorry it took so long to recap, I didn’t mean for it to lol, but there were a lot of parts I didn’t want to just gloss over. so now, here are a few last points I want to make about his arc.
1. first off, it’s important to consider the timeline here. when making your point earlier, you talked about Endeavor building the new home for his kids, but how “on the other hand” he kept trying to force his relationship with Shouto. however the order of these things is switched around. because Endeavor building the house is something that happens at the end of his arc. and in fact we have not seen him try to force anything with Shouto since then. this is important to acknowledge because it shows that he is learning and that it’s not just an insincere case of one step forward, two steps back. the progress he’s making here is genuine; he really is trying not to be selfish anymore.
2. I know I said “the end” of his arc just now, but in fact we have no reason to believe that this is the end of it. every time I see an argument about “well why hasn’t he done this yet, or why hasn’t he said this”, I wonder why people assume that just because he hasn’t done it yet, it means we’re never going to see it. for instance, he still hasn’t apologized to Shouto specifically for the way he abused him all those years. but just because we haven’t seen it yet doesn’t mean that it won’t happen.
3. fandom has this tendency, when it comes to characters they don’t like and don’t want to see redeemed, to continuously move the goalposts so that no matter what that character does and how much they change, they can continue to justify why it’s not enough. I’m going to take a quick break from Endeavor and use Bakugou as the example here instead, since I think it’s easier to summarize.
“Bakugou is such an asshole, all he cares about is himself, he’s definitely going to become a villain.”
[Bakugou refuses to join the villains] “well whatever, he’s still a jerk, just look at how he can’t even work together with others and refuses to help anyone.”
[Bakugou learns to Win and Save, and unlocks the Power of Teamwork] “well whatever, he still doesn’t care about anyone else. look at how he’s still an asshole to Deku even now.”
[Bakugou starts helping Deku train and learn how to control OFA] “whatever, that’s literally the bare minimum, there’s still no proof that he even cares about him.”
[Bakugou literally takes a life-threatening blow to save Deku] “whatever, it’s like he said, his body moved on its own so there’s still no proof he really cares.”
[Bakugou wakes up from a two-day coma, immediately asks about Deku’s health, and rushes to his bedside] “whatever, I don’t know why everyone is making such a fuss over it, he hasn’t even apologized to him yet.”
and so on and so forth. and I guarantee that once he finally does apologize, it will then shift to “well why couldn’t he just have done that in the first place.” but you get my point.
basically, there are certain characters whose redemption arcs fandom will actively continue to deny no matter what. Bakugou is one of those characters, and so is Endeavor. and I’m not saying that in order to call those people out, because everyone has their own boundaries of forgiveness, and I don’t have the right to dictate anyone else’s, just like they don’t have the right to dictate mine. everyone has their own line, and where it’s drawn is different for each person. like for me, the one particular character who can fuck off for all eternity as far as I’m concerned is Overhaul (although I admit I am still curious to see what Horikoshi has planned for him post-prison break in spite of all that). and there are a lot of other people for whom Endeavor crosses their own personal line. and you know what, that’s fine.
but here’s the thing -- if you actually want to debate his redemption arc with people, you should be willing to do so in good faith. meaning that if you really do think Endeavor is unforgiveable (and I’m speaking now in general terms, not addressing you specifically anon), just go ahead and say so! but don’t come up with an arbitrary list of criteria that he needs to meet in order to qualify for redemption, only to keep on adding more and more items to the list. and most importantly, don’t assume that your criteria are the only valid criteria and that you can speak for everyone else. and especially don’t act like you have a right to go around slapping people with labels like “abuse apologist” just because they don’t share the same opinions as you about a fictional character.
anyway! so as usual, a post that I originally meant to be only a few paragraphs long turned out to be a whole damn essay, I apologize. but anyways anon, basically I share the same opinion as you as far as the mindset that Endeavor needs to have for his atonement (i.e. that it’s not about him). however, I think he’s made more progress than this ask gives him credit for, and I don’t think any of it has been fake. that being said, it’s still a process, and his biggest tests are yet to come. whatever ends up happening, I hope the outcome ends up being one that the rest of his family can find peace with.
#endeavor#bakugou katsuki#'makeste why is the bakugou tag there this is supposed to be a meta about endeavor' yes; well; uh; you see; er...#anyways#bnha meta#endeavor meta#bnha#boku no hero academia#bnha spoilers#mha spoilers#bnha manga spoilers#makeste reads bnha#asks#anon asks
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Extremely fascinated by your wag AU tag 👀.
thanks bestie so am i.
okay lmao so this isn't an actual fic that'll ever be written but. i was talking to my friend about it who still hasn't finished dts season 3 unfortunately but it means that i've switched around ages and years etc. i promise this has the potential to be a fun and sexy time but there's just s o much background shit that needs to be discussed. tw for mentions of irl deaths etc:
but pierre & charles meeting when they're 5-6 (which is what i think charles actually says irl but someone said it might've been closer to when they were 10-11? regardless.) and charles' dad passes away when they're 9-10, and jules when they're 13-14 and charles quits racing then. (fyi i know that irl jules passed away first)
he thinks about quitting when his dad passes away but keeps going with help from jules. so when the accident etc happens, it's not even like an active decision he ponders. he just knows there's no way he'll race again.
and pierre's been with him throughout everything, his best friend who he can talk to when he can't bear looking at his own family. so he doesn't understand when pierre tells him he's going to keep racing. when charles had told him he was never going to get into a kart ever again, pierre had nodded, grabbed his hand and squeezed it tight. important to note that they're barely teenagers rn so yes charles feels betrayed that pierre isn't feeling the same things he is and isn't choosing the same future for himself etc.
they have a huge fight, lots of crying, lots of dramatic teenage angst. but it ultimately ends with charles shutting pierre out of his life. which is easier said than done when it's your best friend whose family is super close with yours. but it works because pierre is off racing around the world and charles has done all he can to never have to think about that stuff.
so charles goes to school, is doing uni somewhere in europe. studies something generic like business or maybe if i'm feeling suuuuper indulgent i will have him major in environmental studies like moi <3 pointedly does not come to monaco during grand prix weekend or the week before or the week after.
and then anthoine passes away too. (they're 20-21 now)
they see each other again at the funeral but don't talk, they meet up afterwards. pierre breaking down in charles' arms, clutching at his back, telling him he was right. pierre should've quit, he can't do this anymore either. they haven't said a word to each other in 7 years but charles still knows pierre, and knows that this isn't actually what pierre wants. or what he should do. (charles vaguely knows pierre's in f1 but doesn't know he's with redbull, doesn't know redbull's the top team etc)
"you can still do this, you will," charles tells him.
"not without you again."
so then comes the challenge of mending their relationship while still working through the shared trauma, and the Layers of past trauma. and also just the general awkwardness that comes with a friendship breakup/makeup situation you know! they can't just act like nothing happened but would it be easier that way?
they start texting first, then they play fifa or cod together. (sometimes pierre's british friend lewis joins too.)
slowly slowly slowly, they become friends again and then inseparable too. maybe even closer than they were before and charles only now realizes how much he missed pierre. while pierre still can't believe he has charles back now, it's as good as he let himself imagine.
the part i'm unsure about is if i would want pierre's career trajectory to be the same or not. because i think the demotion adds SUCH a painful but interesting aspect to his ~storyline. but ultimately i think maybe he just doesn't get the second seat immediately. spends more years with toro rosso/alpha tauri before getting "called up" (sorry i have no idea what the proper terminology is haha ignore the nba/nhl terms).
he invites charles to his first race in the red bull and charles says no. immediately. pierre's quiet on the other side of the phone, internally thinking he messed this up somehow. he thought things were going well and he takes this as charles doesn't want to see him. but he knows there's a lot more that's stopping charles and he also knows charles will definitely pull back if pierre asks about the other stuff. so he moves right along, asking charles about school, the weather, and tries not to let it show in his voice that he misses his best friend and needs him too.
"i'm going to try to watch," charles says, after pierre's yawned goodnight through the phone and is waiting for him to hang up. because you know pierre's not going to hang up first.
"what?"
"the race. i'm going to try. goodnight!" mentally charles slams the phone shut but really he just smashes at the red button before shoving it under his bed and looking at his hands trying to get answers for what he just did.
his only relief is that he didn't promise pierre he would watch, just that he would try. couldn't even choke out a, "good luck." (insert long paragraph about charles letting pierre down or thinking he has).
he only watches qualifying. pierre p3. already knows on saturday that there's no way he can watch the actual race.
but on sunday when he's supposed to be going over his notes for his climate change science & policy course (yes.... i did it...) he finds himself with his heart in his mouth refreshing formula1 dot com. watches the random names move up and down while keeping his eyes on 10 - gasly. (starts shaking for a second when he sees pierre's name drop until the IN PIT sign comes up across his name. fellas the thing about triggers is-- anyways.)
the scariest part is that by the time he's scrolled through all of red bull's socials to look at pictures of pierre on the podium (he finished p2 sorry i know this truly does not matter), he's forgotten about the race. the anxiety sits small in the back of his throat, his happiness for pierre is bright and loud in front of him. charles sends him a message, asking him to call whenever he can and adds a blue & red heart emoji which feels like a Big Step. but basically pierre calls and acts like nothing has happened since the last time they talked. mentions the breakfast he had in detail as if he didn’t get a podium in his first race with red bull. finally with a big team. but charles embarrassingly realizes that maybe his text didn't exactly imply in literally any way whatsoever that he knows the results of the race and was trying to congratulate pierre with this call. charles probably feels so embarrassed at this point but somehow still can't manage to say anything about the race until the next day maybe.
maybe texts pierre, good job. or, you were great. or something about him and not the race. or maybe reposts a picture from red bull but not one of pierre in his car, pointedly. only one of him on the podium. and pierre probably reposts it with the squid emoji and/or my favourite sentence in the world, merci petit calamaro.
charles cries when he reads it.
not to be lazy now but [insert 10k words of them building their friendship. meeting up in monaco with both of their families. meeting in milan or london or paris idk where pierre would live. but he flies charles out. not on a private jet because charles flat out refused lol. not because he's an environmentally conscious king he's just too, embarrassed? overwhelmed? by pierre doing Things Like That for him. even though he wants it lol. like when he graduates he's soooo annoyed that pierre couldn't come celebrate immediately because it was race week. but when he comes home his apartment is filled with flowers (roses, his favourite) and balloons and a giant teddy bear as tall as charles. and he DOES post 12 instagram stories to go with the other 30 from his other friends congratulating him. so yeah charles goes through a lot of personal growth and therapy. to the point where he's watching pierre race again, and waiting for him to invite him to a race again!!! do not even think about actual dates i'm fucking begging you but the one he goes to is monza :))))]
ultimately charles' path to understand/accepting/moving on from, his trauma, happens once he has pierre back in his life. it's also encouraged by pierre, but it's also not entirely because of him. not sure how to word that but yeah. these things are happening at the same time but charles still has to go through them by himself.
pierre takes him on romantic dates all around the world and charles doesn't realize that's what they are. fully in his bestie vibes only mood while pining for pierre in a way he doesn't even quite understand. almost a self deprecating, jeez whoever gets to date pierre is going to be so lucky :/
fanpage on ig: met pierre's alleged bf he's so pretty and sweet, i complimented his shoes and he was so nice. charles reading that: i didnt know he was dating someone :( why wouldn't he tell me :( well at least someone complimented my shoes today :(
pierre doesn't necessarily think they're dating, but he does know charles doesn't quite realize what they're doing so he's just waiting for him to come to terms with it.
not to give this au 10 different subplots but yeah that miscommunication plot becomes our prize for surviving through the first part of this.
but yeah at the last race of the year, that pierre wins because i said so? charles finds him before he goes on to the podium, kisses his helmet. says i love you, i'm so proud of you.
THEN, finally, charles does become pierre's wag. we made it kids. we did it joe.
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fanfic recommendations
for @kittensocute bc i heard “atsukita” and “iwaoi” in reference to fanfiction and i am There
i took your “i love slow burn or slow build fics... so i like relatively shorter burn fics (20-30k). If its a 10k oneshot slow burn hELL SIGN ME UP” and absolutely ran with it.
i listed my fav iwaoi fics (17) with a longer word count (longest is 80k) that are all mostly either canon compliant or divergent with only two straight up AUs. none of them feature heavy nsfw content and most if not all are tagged as friends to lovers lmao. feel free to read the my thoughts or just go into them blind!! and they’re all in order of how much I absolutely adore them :^)
now atsukita is not a big ship *sobs* but here are some of my favorite fics (7) of them! a lot of them are shorter bc i guess that’s just. what happens when it’s a small ship LOL.
the formatting in this is fucked if you open it from ur dash but if it’s on my actual blog it should be fine!
Iwaoi
the courtship ritual of the hercules beetle
Word count: 66k
thoughts: my absolute absolute absolute favorite iwaoi fic. the characterization, the fact that oikawa’s a bastard but because he and iwaizumi are older (late 20s i believe), it feels more realistic and sad rather than oikawa being a bitch for the sake of it. spoiler alert it’s slow burn and pining and mostly oikawa not realizing his feelings. this world building is pretty cool bc iwaizumi is the professional player while oikawa is an entomology professor! also i love non-linear narratives bc of This fic. there’s mutual pining in this fic but it’s really really really subtle to the point where you dont even know if oikawa likes iwa. this made me cry like twice.
sunset towns
Word count: 33k
Summary: In the summer of 2020, Oikawa Tooru returns home from his first successful stint as captain of Japan’s national volleyball team. In one hand, he holds the undisputed weight of an Olympic medal, and in the other, his unresolved feelings for a childhood best friend.
thoughts: the tone in this is So similar to the courtship ritual that I liken this as an alternate story even though it’s still oikawa’s pov. professional player oikawa and regular guy iwaizumi and oikawa is just. bumming around at iwaizumi’s place and naturally he messes up but things happen.
told before and told again
word count: 4k
thoughts: i looked through literally all the tags i could’ve thought of for this and nearly cried when i found it agian. outsider POV!!
In damp earth my body
Word count: 15k
Summary: Onscreen, the nation’s favorite setter has arranged himself so that he’s bowing, forehead pressed to the court, like he’s thanking everyone for their kindness thus far, like he’s asking for forgiveness. Hajime thinks: shit, it’s really happening
thoughts: oikawa retires and moves in with iwaizumi and they blur the line between roommates/best friends and being fwb. this is an iwaizumi pov and the pining is obvious on his end. as a iwa stan the tone made me feel weird bc it makes it seem like iwa cares more abt oikawa than he cares abt himself but. its a good fic
i grew up, you grew down
word count: 19k
thoughts: this is also SO funny bc basically oikawa retires and moves in with iwaizumi and becomes his stay at home wife and a bunch of shit happens like people think that oikawa is dating ushijima and oikawa basically loses it every time. here’s one of my favorite quotes:
“Oikawa also bought a new ultra-strength vacuum cleaner he’d decided to name Ushiwaka out of sheer spite, because it sucked all the air right out of the room. Iwa-chan didn’t think the joke was that funny when Tooru told him, which was frankly very hurtful and insensitive.”
Mint
Word count: 19k
thoughts: iwaizumi is moving and oikawa planned a perfect last hangout and it goes to shit featuring matsuhana. oikawa pov where he pines more than iwa which is something i can get behind!! and this was written in 2015 and iwa’s moving bc of a sports medicine program so iwaizumi stans know and love him sm ;;
Almost a Stranger
Word count: 16k
thoughts: same premise as mint LOL except they’re on a trip together and there’s more non-linear narrative!! this one is a little more mature in tone than mint i would say (funny how people just like splitting them up and throwing them in different countries huh)
with every second that you could give
Word count: 9k
Summary: The journey of Iwaizumi and Oikawa going for gold.
Quote: He knows they’re too close. Iwaizumi knows it too, and they both decided to move in together anyway.
thoughts: iwaoi roommates and they’re both obviously and really pine-y for each other and everyone sees it but them. srsly. they’re sleeping in the same bed. like my god
Lost in Translation
Word count: 9k
Summary: Because misfortune come in threes, Iwaizumi Hajime starts his Thursday having a screaming fight with Shittykawa, spends his lunch break listening to the UCI women’s volleyball team gossiping about how Ushijima Wakatoshi had gone public about his longtime love affair with Oikawa Tooru, and closes out the day by drunkenly dropping his phone into a sewer grate.
thoughts: so funny. so sososoosso genuinely funny. the tone is so snappy and iwaizumi honestly just sounds like a confused teenager (which he is in this) and it gets extra points for including a lot of american culture that a lot of the other iwaoi college au ones don’t include for like. obvious reasons lol.
Something Borrowed
Word count: 16k
Summary: In which Oikawa and Iwaizumi have always been a foregone conclusion to everyone else, but a massive, unanswered question to one another.
thoughts: iwaoi roommates thats abo but it’s like. mentioned twice. whiny and possessive oikawa makes an appearance in this but it’s done really well
things that change, things that stay the same
Word count: 8k
Summary: Oikawa realizes he’s in love with his best friend; it sucks for a while. (But only for a little while.)
thoughts: high school getting together!! my second iwaoi fic ever and this one is just. so sweet. just an unsure oikawa realizing iwaizumi might be more than someone he wants as a best friend. this fic is honestly really really lovely.
galaxies, within you
Word count: 21k
Summary: Hajime and Tooru move in together at the start of university. Too bad they’re stuck with the two gremlins that haunt their apartment.
thoughts: ok this fic was so funny. theyre uni roommates and matsuhana just come fuck shit up and they all act like idiots together even though they go to different schools. and this really throws me back to university days.
Thirty Years and Change (the Games of the XXXIII Olympiad)
Word count: 19k
thoughts: pro! oikawa and iwaizumi haven’t been close for a while until oikawa invites iwaizumi to go to the games with him. there’s a lot of frustration and pining and actually talking about feelings (aka iwaizumi losing his mind and getting advice from people like akaashi)
when it starts to rain, they go inside
Word count: 33k
Summary: “Where?” starts Iwaizumi.“ My parent’s old lakehouse, silly, didn’t you hear me the first time?” OR: Oikawa takes Iwaizumi to his lakehouse for two weeks, post-graduation.
thoughts: this was actually my first iwaoi fic which is funny bc the author doesn’t even like oikawa much and i didnt even ship anything in haikyuu before i read this fic and now im in iwaoi hell. oikawa is really frustrating in this in that it’s basically a really good character analysis on how oikawa comes off as a Mean person all the time bc he’s manipulative and there’s some explicit content
shiver
Word count: 16k
Summary: Oikawa was always the brave one. Hajime just followed two paces behind.
thoughts: iwaoi roommates with oikawa admitting his feelings first back when they were in middle school and iwaizumi putting that thought on the backburner until. obviously. things happen.
Desperado
word count: 80k
thoughts: one of my favorite aus. it’s all from kyoutani’s perspective and it’s almost so au that they’re original characters (if that makes sense). basically iwaoi matsuhana are ex-grifters except iwaoi are estranged and daishou somehow brings everyone back together. excellent world building and reading the pov from someone not involved with the iwaoi drama was refreshing
sing with me a song of conquest and fate
word count: 26k
thoughts: a mythical kings au that’s just. so pretty. iwaizumi ends up becoming oikawa’s servant for some reason and the world building is a+ because you can feel the trust and frustration from both of them build
Atsukita
dreams of me and you
word count: 10k (incomplete)
my second atsukita fic that rly sent me down atskt hell ;; what is essentially post-break up when atsumu gets signed to msby and he’s just Pining and sad for the most part. but the established relationship pre-break up was written really nicely because it just fits my hc of them just being domestic and atsumu being blatantly head over heels
take me home
word count: 4k
i read this this morning and it wrecked me. domestic relationship atsukita?? sign me up
No time like the rest of my life
word count: 19k
mythology au with kita as a regular person and rest of inarizaki as fox spirits! it’s cute and the world building is absolutely lovely but it is an au so they might seem ooc but their core character values are still there
wild blue yonder
word count: 6k
literally full of similes and metaphors and it’s more of an abstract read i guess? but it’s so beautiful and soft and this is exactly how i imagine their relationship
reap and sow
word count: 8k
atsumu confesses and kita ignores him and it’s a couple years after the fact and it’s mostly just weirdly domestic almost roommate like except for the fact that atsumu makes it clear he likes kita LOL. they’re really in character for this!
weightless souls
word count: 2k
pillow talk before atsumu’s first game! the atsumu pov and voice is amazing
if we were both alone
word count: 7k
now this was actually my first atskt fic that sent me down this rare pair hell. it’s an explicit chat fic (both tropes i usually try to avoid) but atsumu types like me (except for the nsfw parts alksfjd) so i guess i like. feel appreciation LMAO.
if you do read like any of these fics pls let me know so we can discuss
♡\( ̄▽ ̄)/♡
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Fanfic Writer Asks
[SOURCE: criminal-minds-fanfiction: Most of the writer ask posts I come across are only like ten or so questions long so I thought I’d try to make a longer one because we like talking about our writing! Feel free to reblog!]
I’m answering all of these b/c I love Q & A’s about my writing, both for my fics and other things.
1) How old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction? It was 2013, so I was 14 years old. I’m now almost 23.
2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one? I’m mostly in the Wicked Musical fandom, but I like to read for other fandoms, like Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Chronicles of Narnia, ect.
3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer. OCs, but I’m more than willing to create an OC for someone based on characteristics they give me.
4) What is your favourite genre to write for? I love me some fluffy romance and hurt/comfort, but I also love some angsty drama.
5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi-chaptered stories, which would it be and why? OMG, don’t make me choose! They’re all my babies! I love all my children equally! They all hold special places in my heart.
6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why? Goodness, most of my stories prior to 2017, because I was in high school and had no idea what I was doing because I was just getting my feet wet with writing.
7) When is your preferred time to write? Anytime really. The latest I’ve stayed up writing a fic was 4AM. *Glares at ‘Threads of Truth’*
8) Where do you take your inspiration from? Where ever it happens to come up. I’m not picky. Movies, music, people I’ve seen on the street, random thoughts that enter my head, anything.
9) In your xxx fic, what’s your favourite scene that you wrote? In ‘Threads of Truth’, it’s a tie between Villy’s first date, and an argument that happens in an upcoming chapter. And that’s all I’m saying about that.
10) In your xxx fic, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternative ending in mind? In ‘Play The Game’, I liked the epilogue ending that I gave Elphaba with her family, even without Fiyero. I like writing her with kids. Another ending would be with the Fiyeraba still together, but I’m satisfied with the ending it has.
11) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it? I’ll go back and fix typos that are pointed out, but I don’t change plot stuff. Like, I wrote what I wrote and I will amend my technique in future stories.
12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why? Other than my OCs, because I get to fully create them and my lowkey babies, I’d have to say G(a)linda. She has so much potential and she’s so much fun.
13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why? Boq. Not because I hate him (I don’t!), but because I don’t normally know what to do with him. If he’s not with Nessa, he’s literally just standing there like a brick wall. No offence, Boq!
14) How did you come up with the title for the xxx? - You can ask about multiple stories. [Ask me about a specific story(ies)]
15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names? I usually change consonants and vowels to already existing names, or add unnecessary letters because... reasons.
16) How did you come up with the idea for xxx? [Ask me about a specific story]
17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on. “Hopefully, this will soak up any more leaks.” (Upcoming Wicked fanfic)
18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them? Yes, 2. Both of them are a few years old and I’ve grown as a writer since then. Maybe one day, I’ll edit them and repost, but not anytime soon.
19) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to? Not everything can have a sequel, y’all! XD
20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently? Yes! Around 60% of them.
21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire? @vinkunwildflowerqueen @raven-curls @mylittleelphie @weaselspeedfanfic Ultimate Queen of Cliffies
22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it? This goes back to Question #6; most of what I posted prior to 2017.
23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence? Silence. I need to focus.
24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes? I can’t write it. They’ll make out, and then be pregnant in the next chapter. Y’all can do the math for yourselves.
25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story? YES! Yes, I have! Both sad tears and tears of joy. I’ve also cringed from second-hand embarrassment at the things the characters do and say. I’m not in control of their actions all the time. Sometimes they tell me what they’re gonna do, and I’m like, “Well, alright, then.”
26) Which part of your xxx fic was the hardest to write? [Ask me about a specific story]
27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow? I write bullet points of things I want to happen in a chapter on the Word Doc, or in the story as a whole, and I try to keep those bullet points in order. And the Notes App on my phone holds a lot of my ideas, and sometimes full scenes.
28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction? That I’d become obsessed with writing and continue doing it for almost ten years, as well as expanding to writing plays and musicals.
29) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like? Yeah. I’m not gonna say which one, but just know there’s one... or a few.
30) In contrast to 29 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at? Yes, and I’m still not gonna say which one(s). I want all the love!
31) Send me a fic recommendation and I’ll post it for my followers to see! (The asker is to send the rec, not the answerer) Yeah, sure!
32) Are any of your characters based on real people? Yes. Villy Doiir from ‘Threads of Truth’ is based on 4 people I know in real life, all mixed together into one wholesome, mother figure/ mentor. Perhaps that’s why I like writing her so much.
33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten? All reviews keep me going, no matter the length. But I love it when people review saying that they picked up on little references that were really just for me. It makes me feel like we’ve shared a moment.
34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten? A guest reviewer once said, “You tend to write Fiyero as an abusive person”. It wasn’t harsh, just... NOT TRUE. Especially for the story they were reviewing.
35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest? Close to my chest. I’ll share it with the world when I’m ready.
36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s? NOPE! You’ll just have to wait and see! LOL!
37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written? I... really don’t know. My stories all have their funny moments.
38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it. I’m very busy, and collabs aren’t really my thing, but I’m always willing to lend an extra pair of eyes pre-posting.
39) Do you prefer first, second or third person? I’ve written one story in the first person and it was fun to get into the character’s head, but I love third person, cause I like knowing what everyone is thinking. Second person makes me feel a certain way and that don’t really like.
40) Do people know you write fanfiction? IRL, no. It’s not something I bring up over dinner. I’ll talk about my plays and musicals, but not fanfiction. I like keeping my fics for the online peeps and my more personal writings for the RL peeps.
41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written? My OC, Princess Hannalyn, from ‘A Royal Romance’. She was so much fun!
42) Song fic - What made you decide to use the song xxx for xxx. I haven’t done a song fic.
43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it? Not fully, but they’ve had little inklings, but certain details were still a surprise. And I’m not mad about it.
44) What is the last line you wrote? “I don’t want this to be the last time we see each other.”
45) What spurs you on during the writing process? When I’ll have one idea, and it spirals into many others, and when the characters write themselves. It makes it so much easier for me. Sometimes they tell me that they’re about to make a bad decision, and I just go along with it. They need to learn and grow somehow.
46) I really loved your xxx fic. If you were ever to do a sequel, what do you think might happen in it? [Ask me for a specific story]
47) Here’s a fic title - insert a made up title. What would this story be about? [Ask me]
48) What’s your favourite trope to write? I love a good Royalty AU (not fully AU ‘cause of our princey-prince, but still) and Holiday AUs. And I’ve never written a Coffeeshop AU, but I LOVE reading them. I’ll read anything. I’m not picky, and I love to see what ideas others have.
49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about? Yes, and both of them were Gelphies: 1 - “Easier Said Than Done” by mecelphie - It’s part of a long, wonderful series of Elphaba and Glinda together at Shiz and how their lives evolve together and has many lovable OCs. 2 - “The Thropp Diaries” by denpa wave chick saki - It’s first-person Elphaba POV of the book. It expands on lots of mentioned moments and we get to journey through Elphaba’s thoughts.
50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why? I’d have to say fluff, so I can get my escape from reality. But it’s hard to write pure fluff without a little bit of conflict.
If you wanna read my stories, they’re all right here: Fae’sFlower
#wicked the musical#wicked#wicked fanfiction#fiyeraba fanfic#faesflower#Q & A#Fiyeraba#gelphie#Elphaba#Fiyero#Glinda#Galinda#fanfiction#fanfic#fanfiction.net#let me tell you about my writing and my stories#writer#Q & A with Nia
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Fic Writer Review
I was tagged by the lovely @oceanandarock <3
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
14!
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
379527
3. How many fandoms have you written for?
on ao3, only 3! ouat (swan queen), the walking dead (caryl) and a series of unfortunate events which i am not proud of but i was Going Through Something lol
4. Top five fics by kudos?
1) Never Give Up - this was my first big swan queen fic! but in retrospect i’m not that proud of it. i wrote it when i was 16 and i haven’t been able to bring myself to reread it, but i’m pretty sure it’s quite ableist and problematic. (i have put that disclaimer on it now)
2) we’re setting fire to our insides for fun - my intermediate multichap. i have mixed feelings about this one - did i have to go so hard on the angst? - but the fact it took me like 2 years to finish BUT I DID still makes me proud lmao
3) rise and fall - i’ll admit i do like this one still. classic soulmate au one shot set in season 1/2.
4) all you never say - i guess y’all like my soulmate aus? this one is more of a rambly character study masquerading as a soulmate au tho so
5) After the End - my current baby! a slow burn AU. v happy this is being well received especially as we are still in the early days. (yes ik the latest chapter is late af but i’m getting there!)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why/Why not?
always! i try to respond to every single one, sometimes i’ll miss one if it’s small/i’m tired but i try! i think it creates a nice sense of community and it’s great to find out what’s landing/what people want. also it’s so sweet that people take the time to comment and i wanna acknowledge that.
6. A fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
i’m a sucker for happy endings, but between the thunder and the lightning (the asoue one shot) is literally full of canon angst, and i’d say setting fire to our insides has a happy ending but with a lot of bittersweetness & is my angstiest fic overall.
7. Do you write crossovers?
nope, just not my thing!
8. Ever received hate on a fic?
luckily not!
9. Do you write smut?
hmmm... i’ve not published anything with explicit smut in it but uh, ya girl might have some stuff on her laptop she’s too embarassed to upload... 🙈 also i have a feeling After the End may require some spice down the line...
10. Ever had a fic stolen?
i don’t think so!
11. Ever had a fic translated?
i don’t think so but now this has come up i have a feeling someone did ask to translate never give up into french? i’m not sure if they actually did. this was so long ago that i honestly can’t remember. does that make me a terrible person? if u did and that was u i am flattered!
12. Have you ever co-written a fic?
no, i personally don’t think i could
13. All time favourite ship?
swan queen, of course <3
14. WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
Enchanted! i was on such a roll with the first few chapters then life and other WIPs took over - maybe i will someday though. I also have a Neverland AU fic i’ve been writing on and off for ages but it’s so hefty i’m not sure it’ll ever see the light of day!
15. Writing strengths?
hmm... maybe descriptions? i think i naturally write with quite flowery and detailed prose - this is also kinda a weakness though because i’ve had to work to balance that with action/dialogue in a decent way.
16. Writing weaknesses?
maybe pacing? i think i get caught up in things and go a bit all over the place. also, if i’m doing something character-studyish i will RAMBLE like no other.
17. Thoughts of writing dialogue in another language?
sadly i only speak english, so anything in another language is translated online and thus probably not very accurate!
18. First fandom you ever wrote for?
i actually think it was merlin!
19. What is your favourite fic you’ve written so far?
my own writing cringes me out so... idk... i’m gonna say After The End because i’m having a really fun time writing it right now.
i’m gonna tag @fancyfanstuff if ya feel like it, and anyone else who wants to do it!
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Hi!!!!! I've been following you for a while and all your posts about Destiel are pulling me straight back to the fandom. I stopped watching around season 9/10 but your enthusiasm is so awesome and I love seeing all your posts on my dash!!!! I've only watched each episode once, but do you have any favorite episodes to rewatch? And do you have any fic recs? I'm so excited that you're excited, it's so contagious. Thank you for being you and for being so lovely! 😆
HELLO thank you so much I’m so glad to share this happiness with you... the absolute hysteria of the implications of this thing
Favourite episodes to rewatch:
As I’ve linked before, this is a great list of Destiel moments to 14. In terms of my personal favourites that aren’t necessarily Destiel oriented (except that as soon as we get to s7 who am I kidding):
Faith
In My Time of Dying
Tall Tales
What Is and What Should Never Be
Mystery Spot
Lazarus Rising*
On The Head of a Pin
The Rapture
Lucifer Rising
Free To Be You And Me (!)
The End (!!)
Changing Channels
Point of No Return
Swan Song
The French Mistake
The Man Who Would Be King (!!!)
A Little Slice of Kevin
Sacrifice
Heaven Can’t Wait
Meta Fiction
Fan Fiction
First Blood
Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets
The Future
All Along The Watchtower
Lost and Found
The Trap
Despair
*literally any episode with Castiel from here on out and now even MORE SO given the recent Implication of 15.18. Just go to his wiki page lol. Also Season 4-5 really does fuck when it’s plot related wow.
Fic recs:
Ok these are just the fics I’ve read recently, I know there’s a bunch of stuff that was written pre-s7 that isn’t here but I haven’t gone back through my rec lists and evaluated what’s stood up to the test of time. So these are the ones I’ve evaluated on my recent binge over the past year:
Down To Agincourt
I haven’t remotely finished this, I’m reading it right now. Get past the first chapter being purple prosey (this is what kept me back from reading it before this month and MISTAKE) and you’ll be like. What. the. fuck. Incroyable. Over a million words of End-Verse angst and pining but also has humour and some absolutely outstanding writing. Ben Edlund come collect your legacy. The premise is that Dean from s7 post-Cas death gets sent back to the 5.04 world at the moment he left it, and takes over from End-Verse Dean - and starts to fight for a hopeful future. My one caveat is so far there’s been very little mention/concern over Sam but it’s FINE because this is SO GOOD. Technically a WIP but being updated.
Ninety One Whiskey and anything by komodobits (warning A Complete Kingdom is very good but has an unhappy ending).
Don’t know if you’re getting the feeling that I like extremely long fanfic but uh.... frankly if it’s not 300,000 words of pining it’s not a slow burn. After I finished this I literally had one of those moments where I had to lie down and stare into space and by ‘moments’ I mean like a full 24 hours. Life changing. World War II AU that is so artfully rendered and researched that it makes literally anyone who thinks they could be a writer cry.
You Can Keep Holding On and anything by NorthernSparrow
If we hadn’t had SPN go past S5 I’m not sure NorthernSparrow would have gotten into Destiel and that alone is why post s5 SPN deserves rights. Relative to komodobits, always happy endings and fluffy and so on. One of the rare authors who also writes AUs with rights. NorthernSparrow is a... nature academic? Of some kind, and that plays into their fics - lots of references to Castiel’s wings and bird anatomy.
Redemption Road
I’ve literally also not finished this even though I’ve got halfway through it three times now over the past decade slkdfjlskdjflkds SORRY my attention span cuts out when they get together don’t @ me. Variable quality sometimes because they have a team of different writers that came together to write an alternate Season 7, but overall really really good and some of the writers are incredible. Also like love it bc they just flexed on the writing team at SPN so hard with this. Has an alternate epilogue which happened because the writing team disagreed on the ending and had a whole drama (we love group projects) which I believe is better than the original(?), although having not read it to the end I can’t testify to that.
Ok I simply can’t continue to fill your dash with long descriptions so here’s some more recs in shorter forms, (canon-verse because what’s an AU? I don’t know her) and favourite authors: All Things Shining, The Law of Equivalent Exchange, Dean and Cas’ Top 13 Zepp Traxx, Where the Weeds Take Root, and just for a palate cleanser, the very funny crack fic Broadway Musical. Also some authors who have written a lot of rec-worthy canon-verse fics: aeli_kindara (some SERIOUSLY good and happy fics here), xylodemon, pantheon_of_discord.
My bookmarks folder is currently an unorganised MESS, usually I have things bookmarked on my Diigo but since a) most of these aren’t on there and b) I can’t verify the quality of fics I read before my destiel hiatus, this is the best I got! I’ll update and organise all my destiel bookmarks one day sorry...
#destiel fic recs#charlee-esque#ask#limited myself here because I am wasting TOO MUCH time on this website and also didn't want to put this in a separate post with a read more#sorry that it's so long#long post for ts#kira for ts#fic rec#supernatural for ts
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for the ask game: give me recs please! they can be books, movies, songs, poets, artists idc i’m good w anything 😊
ooooohhhhohohohoh anon, do you know what you’ve done to me? recs for anything? buckle in, my friend, this might get weird
BOOKS:
The 7-1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle: i read this one last month and it was amazing! such a good murder mystery. it kept me hooked through every single page. if you love a good mystery, try this one out.
The Song of Achilles: this is already a widely known book, but hand to god i hadn’t heard of it before this past year. it…ruined me. in all the best ways. i shove it in everyone’s face now. if you haven’t read it—DO IT.
The Georgina Kincaid series by Richelle Mead: one of my all-time favorite series. it’s about a succubus living in seattle who works at a book store. it’s got demons and imps and vampires and angels and nephilim and an adorably shy author. it’s so fucking good, i’ve read the series at least 5 times now. incredibly well-written.
anything by Richelle Mead, actually. i’m a huge fan of all of her work. i was introduced into her work with the Vampire Academy series and i’ve read everything she’s written since then. they just finished casting the VA tv series for Peacock, so that’s something to look out for!
MOVIES/TV:
i’m super into horror, so if that’s not your thing just skip on down. also worth noting that i rewatch a lot of stuff. like more than i think other people do.
The Conjuring movies: they’re all incredible. that’s all i can say.
The Haunting of Hill House/The Haunting of Bly Manor: they’re not the same story but they’re equally great. i’m getting ready to rewatch Hill House bc it’s been a while and it’s fuzzy in my memory. Bly Manor makes me sob. the queer story they tell hits me so hard and the ending leaves me a mess, but it’s so worth it.
Midnight Mass: a new addition! i almost didn’t watch this due to some comments i saw on twitter, but i changed my mind and. omfg. i wouldn’t have forgiven myself if i never watched it. (Mike Flanagan is?? a genius?? he also did the two Hauntings mentioned above. his work is incredible.)
NBC’s Hannibal: listen. i will never ever shut up about it. i went in watching it before i knew Hannigram-the-ship was even a thing. but 👀. pushing the ship aside, the show is amazing. the cinematography is beautiful, the sets are elaborate and elegant. i’m obsessed. as a fan of Anthony Hopkins’ portrayal, i didn’t know how i’d feel about Mads Mikkelsen as Hannibal but he adds something special to the character that’s so intriguing to me. (i wouldn’t explicitly list this as horror, but it IS gory. be forewarned.)
MUSIC:
eehhh i’m hesitant to recommend anything in this category for two reasons. 1. i do not branch out very often, if at all. 2. i don’t meet a lot of people who enjoy the post-hardcore type rock that i’m in love with. but! i’ll say what my current favorites are:
Eidola: their lead vocalist, Andrew Wells, is….okay. you ever feel really down and you can feel yourself going to a dark place, and then you go outside and the weather is perfect—like, 65 degrees and sunny and windy—and you just stop and feel the sunlight on your skin and it’s almost as if it’s warming you up from the inside? and suddenly that dark place isn’t so dark, and you feel something like hope? THAT is Andrew’s voice to me. (also he’s a beefcake and i might be in love with him) and their lyrics are so poetic and beautiful and they strike me right in my soul. so, if i’m recommending any of their songs to anyone, i would have to go with Perennial Philosophy or Elephant Bones. or Tetelestai. or Dendrochronology. and Sri Vishnu Yantra makes me scream sometimes. they’re literally my favorite band, i’d recommend it all. and ok so, they do mostly clean vocals but they also have screams in most of their stuff. and that’s why i never recommend music, bc most people balk at it lol. but it’s not heavy metal. it is not. heavy. metal. people sometimes make that mistake.
Circa Survive: another huge favorite of mine. the same type of genre, no screamo though! i’ve been listening to them for, god, over a decade now. similarly to Eidola, their lyrics are very beautiful, and paired with Anthony Green’s vocals and their instrumentals i just?? i can’t describe it. i have a lot of thoughts and feelings about their albums, mainly bc their stuff goes back to when i was in high school. so listening to their discography is like being in a time machine for me. it’s hard to recommend just a handful, but some songs i’d recommend are I’ll Find a Way, Through The Desert Alone, Flesh and Bone, and their entire new EP, A Dream About Love. specifically Drift, but the EP is only 6 songs and they’re all great.
#i’d love to hear your thoughts if you try anything out!#OR if for some reason you’ve read/watched/listened to these already i have tons more to recommend#but this was getting long and my lil typing fingers hurt from the excitement#i’m cool i swear#t answers#anon
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@little-brisk tagged the entire internet a la livejournal, and I will do the same! Answer these if you wanna answer them.
1. Name/Nicknames: off to a great start by refusing to put my real name here! however, my fandom nickname is CoC or just “coc” which makes me laugh
2. Gender: (cis) woman, lazy femme, lesbian
3. Star Sign: scorpio! i’m not scary but i am very much a scorpio
4. Height: 5′3″ (i’m actually a bit taller than 5′3″ but it sounds like I’m saying “I’m six and three-quarters years old!” to say I’m 5′3.5″. But I am between 5′3″ and 5′4″.
5. Time: 9:28 a.m. eastern time
6. Birthday: November 4. My birthday is pretty much always me being filled with election anxiety, recovering from election anxiety, or experiencing the day of a massive election. I do not recommend being born at the start of the month in which an unstable democracy re-ups itself!
7. Favourite Band: right now it’s The Weather Station!!!!!!
8. Favourite Solo Artist: Dusty Springfield
9. Song Stuck in My Head: hahahah “Black Rainbows” by Cut Copy because I used a line from the song to title a fic I wrote yesterday
10. Last Movie: watched I Care a Lot last weekend
11. Last Show: my wife and i are about to start watching season four of Dix Pour Cent (Call My Agent) on Netflix. it’s so good!
12. When I Created This Blog: summer 2014!
13. What I Post: feelings about fictional women and real women
14. Last Thing I Googled: “torrey peters” (I’m reading Detransition, Baby right now and it’s so good and I wanted to know a bit more about her!)
15. Other Blogs: I have a website and a tumblr under my real name. That tumblr gets no use anymore and hasn’t for years.
16. Do I get asks?: Not super often, but sometimes! I get asks when I request prompts or ask questions, and sometimes I get really lovely anon (or not anon!) asks out of the blue. I rarely get anything nasty.
17. Why I Chose My URL: because it’s the same as my (nearly) meaningless fic pseudonym
18. Following: 306
19. Followers: 1020
20. Average Hours of Sleep: probably about 7?
21. Lucky Number: 22
22. Instruments: lol, I used to play the clarinet and you should feel glad I don’t anymore. Haven’t since middle school!
23. What I Am Wearing: I am still wearing my pajamas, which are some olive green sweatpants and a brewery t-shirt and a grey sweatshirt
24. Dream Job: I don’t entirely know my answer to this question. My dream life is a writing life, and I have as close to that as I can without literally quitting my job in order to write only the things that I, specifically, want to write. And I don’t want to do that because my feelings about my day job exist on the spectrum of like to love pretty much daily. Even if I’m usually stressed out I am very, very privileged and blessed in my work.
25. Dream Trip: Mexico City but probably not until I’ve learned more Spanish. I’d love to go back to the UK at some point. And I want to explore more of Canada! Oooh and the plains here in the U.S.
26. Favourite Food: homemade bread, by itself or with salted butter or with spicy peanut butter or with butter and radishes. i also love spicy food, especially thai curries, and vegetables (esp broccoli and broccoli rabe) roasted until they’re a little crisp, and lots of different potato-related foods, and the best thing I’ve cooked recently is salmon in a miso-maple glaze and the best thing my wife has cooked recently was this chickpea dish with greens and lots of cheese, omg
27. Nationality: american. womp womp
28. Favourite Song: "time (the revelator)” by Gillian Welch
29. Last Book I Read: the last book I finished was the care and feeding of waspish widows by Olivia Waite (fun book with a terrible cover, MAYBE IT���S JUST ME but if I’d written a book in which a fat forty-something woman is rightfully and happily an object of great sexual desire I’d be miffed if my book came out with a stock photo-style portrait of two thin women in their early thirties at most)
30. Top 3 fictional universes I would love to live in:
Girl, Woman, Other by Bernardine Evaristo because reading that book was like meeting new friend after new friend and I really missed them after the book was over! I gave the book to one of my aunts for Christmas and she told me she felt like she’d just met a bunch of new people, and it made me so happy that she had that reaction too.
I am not cut out for a life on the run but all the outdoor settings on the show Wanted are so beautiful so I would be willing to live there and aid and abet Chelsea and Lola if they needed help. I’d return to my own reality the second I met one of those massive Australian bugs, though.
I know I’d be so miserable but Battlestar Galactica was really, really immersive TV for me and I think I’m decent in a crisis and I guess if I lived in the world of BSG I’d find out for real.
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Rejected Requests Part 1
(Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6 , Part 7 , Part 8).
Hey everyone! I hate to be making this post, but I unfortunately have reached the point where I think it’s in everyone’s best interests if I just... Start rejecting things I’ll probably never write. I’ll link this post on my Masterlist and, if I ever get around to it, a requesting guidelines post 😅
I understand this is very disappointing for many of you (especially those that have been waiting for a long time). If you are off anon, you will be receiving a message from me personally explaining why I’m rejecting sometime in the next week or so. I promise it has nothing to you, and mostly it’s just because my brain has decided it doesn’t want to cooperate.
As for the anons, I will post the rejected fics below the cut. I want to give you the opportunity to ask another Author (check the list of Authors currently seeking requests here!)
Otherwise, here is the list for anyone who might want to pursue the request with someone else, or for any writers that are looking for inspiration. If you do write one of these, PLEASE comment here so the original Anon might be able to find it!
1. Lies & Lila: Reader has a talk with her boyfriend about him kissing a literal movie star.
I unfortunately am just very uninspired by this request. I thought I might be able to think of something with cheating Reid, but I can’t. I’m not a fan of any cheating fic. That being said, I have heard other writers say the idea is interesting. You can probably find someone to write it!
2. Abnormal: Princess!Reader is going undercover and learning how to be “normal” from the worst possible teacher.
This is a cute idea, but for whatever reason my brain is just broke with it. I REALLY think you should ask someone else, cause I’d probably read it! It is more a series idea, so I’ll probably never get to it.
3. Flarpy Blunderguff
I’ve always found the idea of oil-based paints and fruit kinda icky. I bet an artist could come up with something good, but my drawings look like a chicken drew them.
4. Probably-Not-A-Request
I’ll probably never write this, and it probably wasn’t a request, but I kind of want someone else to write it, lmao. Write this for me.
5. Almost Lover(s): Reader has a different reaction than the rest of the team when she finds out about Maeve.
I’m rejecting this purely because I’ve seen it written at least a couple dozen times. I don’t think there is anything new I could contribute that would inspire me enough to write it.
6. New Orleans: Ethan/Spencer.
Sigh. I love these boyfriends so much, but I’d like to keep my fics as just Reader/Spencer at this point. That being said, I’m trying to do more Male!Readers!
7. Solidarity: Platonic. Spencer/Gay Male Reader
Same as I just mentioned above - I’d like to keep my pieces romantic Reader/Spencer for now. Platonic pieces do SO horribly on this site, so it’s really hard for us to feel inspired to write them.
8. Secret Weapon: Reader’s only smart when she sleeps, but she never really does that.
I unfortunately don’t really have a reason for this beyond it requiring a LOT of research from me, and I’m lazy, lol. I think someone should write it with a Reader who works the graveyard shift. It’d be funny.
9. Also-Probably-Not-a-Request
Another one I kept in my inbox in case it was a request but it’s probably not. I do want someone to write it, though. I think it would be a fun exercise of writing the different characters.
10. Application Anguish: Platonic. Young!Reader asks for Spencer’s help in applying for Uni.
Once again, I’m sorry that I am unfortunately trying to keep my fics majority romantic now since platonic fics do SO poorly. I’m also a bit caught on this because I haven’t filled out applications in a really long time, and I’m afraid I had a very different experience. I don’t think I could do it justice - but I know someone else can and would probably enjoy it!
11. Red String
I’m done with kidnapping fics. I’m so sorry, but they bore the ever living hell out of me. There are thousands of them and I cannot think of anything that hasn’t been done. Also, I asked this anon a question in a post before but unfortunately never heard back so - if you want this, go for it!
12. Mistakes and Memories: Spencer sees Nathan Harris again, still at the other end of a service weapon.
Again, I want to try and keep it Reader/Spencer from now on. Also, writing Anton makes me sad : (
13. Cinderella: Spencer talks Reader down from her traumatic event and reminds her that life isn’t a fairytale. But years later when they run into each other again, neither can deny it’s a little bit of fate.
There is a lot going on in this request. Unfortunately I think I would have to take it in a very different direction and I’m not sure you’d be satisfied with it. It is a unique premise, though, so I’m sure you’ll be able to find someone else to write it!
14. Cheating Fic
I unfortunately have been cheated on too many times to want to write this 😂 and even though Spencer canonically cheated on Max, it still feels so out of character for him. I’m POSITIVE you can find someone to write this, though. A lot of people like heartbreaking angst, apparently.
---
If you’ve read this far... Thank you! Sorry for all of you that I denied, but I hope that this clears you to ask some of the other authors here!
Thank you! I love you all.
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1/? simply because you have the most galaxy brain thoughts ever,,, what do you think would've happened if they waited until s5 to reveal sergio and andrés were (half)brothers?
i do know that when my fam started watching lcdp at first i was so put off. like i watched ep 1 and the prof creeped me out. ""berlin"" creeped me out. e v e r y o n e creeped me out. and i was cringing so hard becz of the short lived romance angle with alison parker. i literally did not watch s1 at all xcept for like sneak peeks. highlights being the scene where berlin discovers monica is alive and does his dramatic door by door thing? that was so SUSPENSEFUL even tho i had no idea what was going on. DOMINGO DE RESURECCION remains forever iconic.
2/? And OF COURSE the group bella ciao dance when they hit earth (hahah i thought the banda were actually like a "found family where they all love each other LOL") i am a SUCKER for found family. but anyhoo when i properly got intrigued was s2 when tokyo was kicked out (the music from that scene is still my favourite) it's just so dramatic..!! why am i telling u all this again? right, i haven't slept a wink and it's nearly 7 am pls forgive me if these rambles make no sense. i have a point with this.. i'm going somewhere
RIGHT. so when the fam actually rewound the ep cz i wanted to know WHY berlin did that (didn't fully realise how batsht crazy he can be), the russian roulette scene played. and pedro's acting. MAN. and like just that ep they made a point of showing us these flashbacks where sergio and andrés hug....
Hi anon! Thanks for stopping by- sorry took me a while to get back to you, will do my best to answer this string of messages (got all 4 parts)! Glad you like my thoughts XD
Firstly, I believe Andres/Sergio would be the biggest LCDP ship if the writers were evil enough to wait until s5 to reveal that they’re brothers asdfasdf. They’re already the two most popular male characters anyway.
It’d be especially crazy because it’s not like they tell the actors these things beforehand either. So that means there’d probably be a Serdres vs Berlermo vs Serquel fight every 5 minutes. I mean, even if not everyone agrees on everything in the lcdp fandom, it’s the most “peaceful” one I’ve ever been in because no character really gets in the way of any other ship (like even with helermo and berlermo there’s no true conflict since Andres is dead). But with Serdres in the mix?? CATASTROPHE. Everyone out here writing essays about how much of a bastard/bitch/homewrecker/motherfucker that Andres or Sergio or Martin or Raquel is. Never a moment’s peace!! so basically, a regular fandom lmao.
Then when we find out they’re brothers, it goes from catastrophe to Apocalypse. Suddenly serquel and berlermo have the upper hand. Everyone would double down and harass the crew/cast into whatever’s going on. Plot-wise, everything is the same though, just without Andres calling Sergio “hermanito.” Fandom however, would be a minefield! And I’m glad that’s not the case because I’d probably be an unfortunate serdres shippers XD No joke, my mother and I thought they were a couple in S1. So bullet dodged!
Secondly: haha, everyone creeped me out in S1 too, especially Berlin, I hated him, but thinking back, I think I mostly hated the fact that I didn’t hate him as much as I should have. I’ve made peace with it now but oh boy, was he a controversial figure in my head. I actually like the professor on sight though! IDK why, maybe because I thought his plans were cool or because of Alvaro’s delivery. I was afraid of an Alison Parker romance thing too- like, I do feel like she had a storyline that got dropped, but that part was quite cringey and overall unnecessary to the plot. Same with Ariadna, which was even cringier and even Less necessary to the plot.
Domingo de resurrecion was iconic though yes! And even with all that said, I genuinely enjoyed parts 1 and 2 because it was so different from anything else I’d seen. Not content wise, but maybe tonally? IDK, they were just really bold with a lot of things, like being objectively unafraid of having the protagonists (plural because all of them did LMAO) do objectively shitty things. Really kept me in suspense from beginning to end!
I’m usually a big fan of found families too! The funny thing is, then banda never struck me as a “family” until season 3. In 1 and 2, I was wondering what felt different about this show; then it hit me that these people remained colleagues to the end. Like, they backstabbed each other (repeatedly) and everyone was quite selfish, and only the bonds that were already there stuck. They were the opposite of a found family LOL But I think by S3, they went down the found family route and I didn’t mind because it makes quite a lot of sense for them to feel that bond after the Mint heist and almost dying/living together (and having witnessed 3 deaths together on the team). But I still doubt Berlin and Palermo were ever really part of this found family, with good reason XD
LOL the scene where Tokyo got kicked out is also among my favorites!! It was so funny and dramatic, and it was like, wow we can go anywhere with this now! Don’t worry- your rambles and thoughts are always welcome :D
I’m rolling over how you watched the Tokyo expulsion scene before the Russian Roulette scene haha. Also yes, PEDRO. Berlin may have been “controversial” to me at first, but I became Pedro’s fan from day one! Also the Hug is probably what made me like Berlin (despite my determination to hate him rip) in the first place.
3/? ... and like now that i think about it... tokyo had real guts huh. like she KNEW berlin was close enough to el prof to know his name (fhshshs imagine if she'd heard andrés saying 'hermanito' it's unrealistic that she didn't TBH. i mean obviously they decided to make them brothers only towards the end but like in canon universe. how tf did andrés de 'i raised my bby brother since he was 12 and i'd actually die for him and his stupidly brilliant plans' fonollosa go 5 months without slipping up once and calling sergio hermanito. or like,,, i like to imagine sergio kinda gave him lots of leeway(?) sergio's a lil oblivious too but like i'm sure half of it is.. that's my dumbass older bro shut up i'm not being partial you all have city names .. andr-berlin, pass the salt. like OOF. + sergio also knew his big bro was dYiNG so like. i'm sure they were sneaking in some quality time (i hope they did 😭 gosh imagine if sergio really did not ever consider the possibility of andrés dying in the heist so he'd tell himself he needs to perfect the plan now & anyway he'll have enough time to spend w/ his brother post heist in philippines. and then ... that happened :/
Tokyo has guts in place of braincells you bet that she’d do something like this, consequences be damned XD I also think it’s unrealistic for Andres not to slip up, but I have a feeling nobody besides Tokyo really tried to spy on them in private. I headcanon that Andres instead slips up and does things like ruffle Sergio’s hair or adjust his tie when other people are around. I also think Tokyo was convinced that they were a gay couple when she saw them hug XD And if Sergio never went on to tell the banda that Berlin was his brother, everyone would be giving Palermo such awkward looks after Nairobi accused him of being in love with Berlin LMAO.
I agree! I also imagine Sergio giving Andres leeway because he’s just so used to interacting with his brother that way haha. So either he’d go out of his way to ignore Berlin in front of everyone else or IDK, borderline telepathically communicate with him. Not even “pass the salt” has to leave his mouth- Berlin just puts salt into his food and cuts it up for him, in front of everyone who’s just staring like O.O
I actually do think Sergio never considered the possibility of Andres dying in the heist because he was just that confident in his own plan. Plus, Andres was probably the one person he expected to survive. And a lot of it has to do with Sergio’s attachment to him + Andres’ own habit of downplaying any illness/injury over the years, which I think is safe to believe canon. He was really in no condition to be in the heist, let alone lead it. Just the fact that he needs to take those injections is a big sign that he shouldn’t be there, but Sergio didn’t catch it because he’s human and blinded by faith :’) So yeah, I think Sergio was planning to spend proper time with Andres in Palawan and at Toledo, they just settled for those little moments by the fireplace.
4/? what always also just GETS me in the feels is that el prof was shown to be this in control creepily calm dude who is miles ahead of everyone. + in the 1st Toledo class itself we see how detached,, like how impersonal he is, how professional - choosing frickin CITY NAMES?! no 'personal relationships' ? (after recruiting his older brother, a father son pair, and war cousins... oh sergio 😂 he's such a frickin nerd and i love him) but like the earlier seasons really emphasised how robotic and down right COLD he can be. it still sometimes bothers me that he put the button in the car. he lead the police to his own damn brother, his blood, who took care of him and adopted him and was terminally ill and like - UGH i try to rationalise that sergio is that cold and unbothered. or that he has strict morals. but it still bothers me becz that button really sort of tipped andres' already unstable sanity. like andrés tells denver someth like you've robbed my future and after that he just seems so much more suicidal and accepting that he can't get out of the mint alive - WHY SERGIO WHY. I KNOW THAT AT THAT POINT YOU BASICALLY DIDN'T KNOW ANDRÉS WAS GOING TO BE YOUR BROTHER YET BECZ IT WASN'T WRITTEN IN THE SCRIPT BUT WHYYYYY
That’s so funny to me too LMAO No personal relationships, then he recruits these guys. Sergio, hello?? Also can’t forget how he just recruited his own girfrleind in the second heist too. Buddy! Love this nerd.
I don’t think that cold aspect of Sergio went away in later seasons either; he just had more opportunity to show a more open side of himself + without Andres, he had to metaphorically leave his comfort zone without a safety net. But in earlier seasons, he really did seem heartless at times XD Then again, we can argue that the same goes for Andres.
To be fair, I didn’t feel sorry for Andres over the button thing lol, but once the brothers reveal happened and all of Alvaro/Pedro’s headcanons came out and we know everything Andres did for Sergio, it makes what Sergio did REALLY harsh. We really just have to explain it through Sergio’s strict morals and him believing this to be the best non-fatal punishment for Andres, who at that point had convinced him he killed a hostage. And because he knew the television interview was coming up, maybe Sergio assumed Andres would use it to “clear” his name anyway. And empathy isn’t one of Sergio’s strong suits either, so through that lens, I can rationalize it.
Also it was lowkey funny to me how Andres was there like DENVER MUST DIE until he found out Sergio put the button there, then he was like “oh hermanito, you and your practical jokes <3″
Still, like you said, Andres and Sergio weren’t brothers yet at this point. They were probably supposed to be lovers lmao and had a dysfunctional Hannibal Lecter x Will thing going on. But because they made #hermanos canon, that button moment just feels very out of place now, especially given how much the two genuinely love each other.
Guess we could also say that Sergio’s just generally kinda bratty with Andres XD Like, he knows no matter what, Andres would forgive him anything. That’s how I see it anyway!
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Kiss Me: Logan x Reader
Request: Hmmm. So from the prompt list, maybe number 7 (“If you don’t kiss me right this second I swear I’ll strangle you”) with childhood best friends to lovers logan x reader? Thank you!
Summary: You have a summer party with the sides and come to terms with your feelings for Logan.
Words: 2100+
Warnings: swears, some kissy kissy
Author’s Notes: I got a little carried away with this one XD This is probably the longest one shot I’ve ever written lol, hope y’all like it!
Taglist: @luluwinchester @nerve-ous-love @zarieslayer @amayaisokay
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“Food’s ready everyone!” Patton calls, sliding the last burger onto the serving plate. He’s always been fantastic on the grill, and today he made pretty much everything he knows how. He made burgers, veggie burgers, hot dogs, kabobs, and everything in between.
It’s been a while since you’ve had a fun gathering with the sides, so when he suggested having a summer party in the backyard you all were ecstatic. You’ve all been friends for years, but sadly life gets in the way sometimes and you don’t get to hang out as much anymore.
As much as you’re happy to see everyone there, you can’t help but be extra excited to see Logan. He’s your best friend, and has been through thick and thin. He’s always the first to check in on you and help you out whenever you need it and you truly feel like you can be yourself around him. He lifts you up yet isn’t afraid to be honest with you. He balances you out perfectly.
“Hey guys!” you wave.
“Y/N! So glad you could make it!” Patton runs over and gives you a hug.
Virgil and Janus wave back and Roman and Remus greet you as well.
“Hello,” Logan nods with a smile.
You skip to him as your grin brightens, “Hello,”
“It’s very nice to see you,”
“Of course it is,” you laugh. “It’s nice to see you too. How’ve you been?”
“Very well. Everything appears to be working smoothly. You?”
“I’ve been alright,”
If you’re not mistaken, he’s gotten even more handsome since the last time you saw him. Is that possible?
Wait, what are you thinking?
No, no, it’s fine. It’s totally normal to find your friends attractive, right? You’re sure he’d say the same about you, and it wouldn’t be weird at all.
But damn does his smile make your heart flutter, and the way his slightly grown out bangs fall around his forehead gives you an irresistible urge to touch it. As you grab your food together his hand brushes against yours just for a moment, but it sends shivers down your spine for several more. He makes you laugh whether or not he’s trying to and fascinates you with his extensive knowledge on various topics. He makes you happier than anyone on the planet.
But of course none of that really means anything, right? Never mind the fact that since seeing him today you haven’t been able to get the thought of kissing him out of your head, how badly you want to just whisk him away to the side of the house, grab his shirt and make out with him ‘til you can’t breathe.
Alright, maybe that’s not normal.
It’s not like it would ever happen anyway, you’re sure he sees you as just a friend and you’re honestly fine with that. You’d never want to lose your best friend simply because you caught feelings.
As everyone finishes up their meal, you notice Remus running to the porch and shuffling around in a trash bag.
You turn to Logan, “What’s he doing?”
“I’ve found it’s best not to wonder,” he rolls his eyes. “It’s probably nothing of importance…NO WAIT WATCH OUT!”
Before you know it, you’re completely soaked head to toe and swivel around to see Remus pointing a huge water gun directly at you.
“WATER FIGHT!!” he screeches, pulling out more guns from the bag and tossing them to everyone.
Logan got a bit wet too, but not nearly as much as you, “Oh, Y/N, I’m so sorry, allow me to grab you some towels-“
“No, no, it’s fine, it’s just water,” you glare at Remus. “Hopefully,”
“Neither the color or smell indicate that it’s not,”
You chuckle, grabbing a squirter from the ground, “Come on, help me get back at him,”
“I really shouldn’t, I would prefer to stay as dry as possible,”
“Come on,” you grab his hand and pull him up. “Please?”
He stares at you helplessly, searching for an excuse but unable to resist, “Alright,”
You smile, grabbing him another gun and racing across the yard.
Patton starts filling up some water balloons while Roman flings them around, no one can tell whose side he’s on because he’s barely hitting anything. Janus is taking advantage of his extra arms by having a super soaker in each and aiming at literally everyone. Virgil has teamed up with you and Logan and focuses everything he’s got on Remus.
“Roman I must say, your aim is absolutely preposterous,” Logan comments.
“Oh, would you like to try it? I highly doubt you could do any better,”
“Actually, yes,” he grins, taking a water balloon and throwing it directly at Remus’s face.
Everyone’s mouth falls open.
“Where’d you learn how to do that?” Roman gasps, completely baffled.
“It’s not too difficult, just a few physics calculations and some practice,”
“Can you show me?” you ask, taking another balloon and squinting your eye towards Remus.
“Of course,” he places his hands on your shoulders and straightens out your stance. You desperately hope he doesn’t notice you stiffening and holding your breath from his touch. “The key is to have your arm in line with your eyesight. Even when you pull it back, if you’re not focused the follow through won’t work,”
You nod, gulping a bit and trying not to shake.
“Okay, now try it. It’s alright if you don’t hit him immediately,” his palm stays on your back as you throw it, hitting Remus’s leg.
“I hit him!” you squeal.
“Wonderful! Now we just have to work on aiming a bit higher-“ he steps in front of you as Remus darts a balloon back in your direction. His shirt gets drenched and Remus cackles.
“Oh no, Logan-“
His expression isn’t angry surprisingly. Instead, there’s a fire in his eyes that you’ve never seen before, the face of someone genuinely having fun.
He smirks at you, the way he always does when the gears are turning in his brain.
“Patton, can I see that?” he points towards the hose he’s been using to fill the balloons. Patton nods and Logan gets to work, using all your water guns to build a big canon and positioning it towards Remus. He turns it up to the highest pressure possible and blasts him.
It doesn’t hurt him of course, and even if it did he probably wouldn’t care. He merely falls back laughing, rolling around on the ground and covering himself with dirt and grass.
“Wow,” you sigh, eyes wide.
“You did ask me to help you get back at him, did you not?”
“I most certainly did,”
“Well,” he sets everything down. “I hope I delivered,”
“You did…” your gaze is locked on him. Who knew such a silly water war could make you so much more in love with him, especially with the way his wet shirt clings to him and the droplets on his glasses-
“Are you quite alright?” Logan inquires, concerned.
“Mhmmm,”
“Who wants to make some s’mores?” Patton calls, snatching some firewood. Everyone agrees so he gets it started, wanting to give it time to turn into hot coals. He grabs some crackers, chocolate, and marshmallows from inside and some sticks.
Logan gets towels for everyone and tenderly wraps one around your shoulders. The dampness is still cold, but the sweet gesture warms you up a bit.
Would it be crazy if you told him how you’ve been feeling tonight? Would it be completely irresponsible to flirt with him a bit? It feels wrong, but it feels more right than wrong. You just know he’s the one you’re meant to be with. You can’t imagine yourself with anyone else. He’s your best friend after all, and you’re sure any future partner you could ever have would be threatened by how close you are anyway. If you simply dated each other that wouldn’t be a problem.
But you’re terrified. You can feel your heart pulsing through your fingertips as you hold the marshmallow over the coals. The hot flames make your face burn and you can’t tell the difference between your sweat and the water covering you from earlier. You grow quiet, and Logan notices.
“Is there something wrong?”
Thankfully the other sides are engaged in their own conversation, so they don’t put any attention on you.
“I’m fine, just a bit tired,” you say, pulling your marshmallow away and squishing it between your graham crackers and chocolate.
“Did I mention that you look exquisite today?”
You almost choke on your sandwich, “What?”
“And I assure you our little water detour didn’t change that,”
“Oh, um,” you wipe your mouth with a napkin. “Thank you. You look really good too,”
“I hope that’s alright for me to say, please forgive me if I’ve crossed a line,”
“No!” you shake your head a bit too hard. “I mean, it’s fine. You can say that as much as you want, if that is what you want. Of course you don’t have to,”
Shit.
A smile tugs at his lips, as if he’s actually charmed by your bumbling, “Would you care to go inside? I believe Patton has quite a few card and board games if you’re interested,”
You nod. It’s getting a bit chilly outside anyway, and maybe being alone with him will settle your nerves a bit. Your newly discovered feelings for him aside, he’s always the one person who makes you most comfortable.
He grabs the checkers and sets it up on the table next to the couch, “You can go first,”
You move your first piece and the game begins. He doesn’t hold back of course, he’s not the type to let anyone win on purpose, but he doesn’t rub it in your face either. He makes you smile the entire time and you almost forget how anxious you were before.
That is, until the game finishes and it all comes rushing back. He won, and he looks absolutely adorable. Your stomach is in knots and you just want to look at him this satisfied forever.
“Hey, Logan?”
“Yes?”
“Do you ever wonder if we’d work well in a relationship? Like a romantic one?”
“I…” he considers it, his cheeks flushing a deep pink. “I can’t say I’ve never contemplated the idea. Why do you ask?”
“I was just wondering,” you shrug it off, assuming he’ll want to move on from the topic.
“I think we would,” he says confidently, yet still not able to meet your eyes. “If I’m being completely honest, which I assure you I am, I’ve thought about it many times,”
Your heart pounds in your chest.
“You’re wonderful, Y/N. I admire everything about you. You’re everything I want and value in both a friend and a partner, and I daresay even more. If you ever wanted to escalate our relationship to a deeper level, I would oblige immediately. I truly would,”
You don’t really know what to say. He just confessed his affections for you better than you ever could’ve, and quite frankly you don’t think you could top it. It feels like your heart is beating faster and slower at the same time, the relief of knowing and the panic of what happens next. Obviously he wants you to say yes, right?
But all you can think about is how much you want his lips on yours.
You meet his gaze, “If you don’t kiss me right this second I swear I’ll strangle you,”
“I’m sorry?”
“I love you. It took me a long time to realize, but I know it now. I love you,” you release all the nervous energy. “Now please just kiss me,”
“I…I love you too,” his eyes dart around your face and his grin lights up. It’s as if he can’t take you all in not matter how hard he tries. Nothing in the universe could ever compare to you or what he feels for you.
He kisses you gently at first, resting his hand on your neck. His lips taste like chocolate from the s’mores and they’re perfectly warm.
He pulls away, “Is this okay? Is this what you want?”
“Oh my gosh yes please don’t stop,” you pull him back to you, wrapping your arms around him and kissing him harder. He becomes more self-assured as you go, running his fingers through your hair and holding your waist to bring you closer.
He apologizes when his glasses hit you, but you don’t care. All you can focus on is the fact that his body is on yours and you’re finally kissing the love of your life.
After a while you fall back on the cushions breathless. Logan props himself up on his elbows and grasps your hands, holding them to his cheeks. You smile up at him, giggling a bit.
“I can’t believe we waited so long to do this,” he says, kissing your palm.
You smirk, “Well let’s not wait to do it again,”
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