#I likely won’t have time to play any of the Zelda games I’m chipping away at rn lol

[adrift-in-thyme]

*rubs hands together*

Time to watch A New Hope

[raeynbowboi]

How to Play as Link in DnD 5e (2.0)

With the release of both Mythic Odysseys of Theros and now the new big expansion in Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything, I figured now would be a good time to reexamine Link with the context of new subclasses, class features, and game mechanics that weren’t around the last time that I built him. While I won’t do this for every character I’ve built before, characters who have new options made available with these updates will get a new rebuild for 2021. If you want to compare and contrast this build to the original, I will link that build right [here].

The Spirit of the Hero

Link’s a Hylian and that’s just a fancy way of saying elf. His best racial options are either the High Elf, the Wood Elf, or the Half-Elf. Half-elf’s extra skills are tempting, but as Link is never given any parents or an ancestral family tree, we can’t really justify him as a half-elf. We’ll call him a Wood Elf for the extra +2 to his Dexterity and the +1 to his Wisdom as well as that woodsy vibe. But if you wanna go for a Half-Elf for the power build, I won’t tell anyone.

Link’s alignment is tricky. On the one hand, he is shown kneeling before the monarchy, defeating the forces of evil and darkness, and doing odd jobs to help the common people he comes across. However, he can also start forest fires, break into people’s houses, smash pots, steal people’s life savings or personal belongings, and attack the chicken population until they attack back. I’d wager he’s Neutral Good if for no other reason than his morality is highly dependent on the player.

My first choice for Link’s background would be the Folk Hero for Animal Handling and Survival. However, Link’s background is so inconsistent, it’s easier to just list out the skills he tends to have and tell you to pick a background that has those skills, or create your own: Animal Handling, Athletics, Investigation, Nature, Perception, or Survival. There’s a case to be made for other skills as well. Acrobatics works a little and his jumps did involve sick flips in Majora’s Mask, but Link doesn’t tend to balance or platform jump very often. Link can play instruments fine and danced in the Subrosian Dance Hall in Oracle of Seasons for Performance proficiency, but he’s usually playing instruments to activate effects, not to actually perform for a crowd. Link shows some Stealth skills in Breath of the Wild, but this hasn’t been a longstanding skill of his, so I didn’t lump it in with his main skill list.

Becoming a Hero

When it comes to his build, Link has made some use of spells in the past, but he’s nowhere near the spellcaster that Zelda and Ganondorf are. Link is definitely more of a martial fighter who augments himself with a wide arsenal of magical items. So when it comes to picking Link’s class, we have a few things to keep in mind.

BARD

Link is a talented young man, and he has had magical instruments in a few games over the years, as well as dancing in Subrosia, among other things. While I don’t subscribe to the idea of Link being a bard myself, I understand why people would come to this conclusion, as Link isn’t really bad at anything... except talking. And lying. And looking threatening. Or haggling. Yeah kind of hard to depict Link as a CHA caster who isn’t proficient in any CHA skill checks. 

Spirits (UA) This doesn’t fit for every Link, but especially for Breath of the Wild where Link gets help from the spirits of his fallen comrades, the flavor of calling on the dead works for Link. For a non-BotW example, maybe Link can tell stories of his past lives, and the memories he shares with each of them.

Valor This college has the downside of being built as a cheerleader, while Link really should be built for solo-combat since that’s how he approaches most fights. But Valor is better than Swords and also gives Link proficiency with martial weapons and shields, while Swords does not.

FIGHTER

While there are many martial classes, the Fighter differentiates itself by being the most down-to-earth option. It’s not beholden to rage, or smites, hunting, or sneaking. It is the simple skill of the blade, and this is a skill Link has in spades. From the earliest games, Link has been a master of the sword, the shield, and the bow.

Battle Master Link is a strategic fighter. He looks for weak spots, and he exploits them the best he can. Of all the fighter subclasses, none is more clever than the Battle Master. Its many maneuvers resembles the numerous sword techniques Link has learned especially in the later games. Even in Smash, Link showcases how clever he is by being able to combine his arrows with his bombs and shoot a bomb arrow. To my knowledge, none of the other characters can combine their abilities like this in Smash.

Cavalier The subclass is poorly named, and was better in its initial name as the Knight, as that is really what this subclass is. It is the idea of the knight in shining armor. They can also be flavored as bodyguards, a traveling sellsword, or castle guards. So Link does not have to be glued to Epona to make use of this subclass. The main reason to want this subclass is the Warding Maneuver, as giving Link the chance to either block or reduce all damage he takes is going to seriously improve how well he can tank a hit, and help keep him in a fight longer.

PALADIN

More than any other class, the Paladin actually stands for something. They fight for a value or a belief. They swear their life to a cause and are prepared to die fighting for it. Link works on a lore level as a Paladin. Especially when he’s dedicated multiple lifetimes to the same cause. Across every timeline and game over screen, Link has always returned and stood in defiance against whatever evil may come. 

Ancients This oath makes Link sworn to the forces of nature, such as the Great Fairy, and protecting the balance and harmony of the light, life, and love against death, decay, and darkness. The Ancients Paladin is all about protecting the balance in the world and valiantly opposing evil wherever it might arise. It also has a druidic or fey aspect, which kind of works for Link.

Crown With this vow, Link serves the Hyrulian Royal Family. This makes Link the princess’ personal knight, and an agent of lawfulness, order, and peacekeeping in the land. While 5e has backed away from typecasting Paladins as Lawful Good, this is probably the most Lawful subclass one could pick, as it places the authority of the royal family above all else.

Glory Instead of being sworn to the light or the law, the Glory Paladin is the harbinger of the goddesses. They are flavored as legendary heroes of destiny, possibly being demigods or the personal errand boys of the setting’s pantheon. This subclass is clearly focused on being a frontline warrior, and the features make Link a true force on the battlefield.

RANGER

Anyone who’s played Legend of Zelda knows that Link is very good at surviving. The games don’t tell you how to navigate the wilderness, Link just has to figure it out for himself. What’s more, Link may be willing to venture into the wilderness, but he’ll be hard-pressed to find many NPCs that far outside of settlements or cities. Yet what they fear, he thrives in. And it’s no wonder that this is the class most peole would assume for Link.

Hunter This conclave is the slayer of all things that threaten civilization. They can choose to be better at chipping away at one enemy, counter attack bigger monsters, or mow through hordes of minions with more ease by taking out multiple at a time. Especially at higher levels, this conclave excels at ripping apart Ganon’s forces with nary a golden curl out of place.

ROGUE

The rogue doesn’t need to be a wanted criminal on the lamb. They can be a clever fighter with a variety of skills and a knack for evasion. That speaks a lot more to Link’s skill set than one might assume at first glance. It’s not a perfect fit for Link, but it’s really not that inaccurate either.

Inquisitive This roguish archetype is defined by being clever in combat, looking for weak points to exploit. They’re also much more observant, making them better at discovering clues or secret passages, or telling when they’re being misled. At higher levels, their ability to look for weaknesses can even increase their sneak attack damage. This especially fits some of the older games where boss fights were focused on using items to exploit the dungeon boss’ weaknesses, rather than hacking away at their health bar. In these older titles, Link was less of a straight up warrior and more of a clever trickster pulling off strategic victories.

Scout The Scout Rogue has heavy Ranger vibes, as they get free expertise in Nature and Survival, enhanced mobility, the ability to disengage from fights more easily, and at higher levels become masters of ambushes. This fits well with Link’s sneakier sniper playstyle that can be done in Breath of the Wild, as Link can take out entire camps without ever being seen.

Thief While Link is not a standard cutpurse, Link is a treasure hunter, a dungeon delver, and the jokes about him robbing the people of Hyrule and breaking into people’s homes doesn’t exactly help. The thief also gets to use more magical items, allowing Link to use things such as enchanted instruments without being a bard.

WARLOCK

Link usually isn’t the hero of his own volition. He often starts his journey with Triforce of Courage, a source of power gifted by his patrons. It’s honestly a weak connection, but it loosely works, so I’m including it. 

Celestial While this subclass is geared toward serving something other than a god, I don’t see any reason why a Celestial Warlock couldn’t serve the Triple Goddesses of Hyrule or even Hylia/Zelda directly.

Hexblade The most obviously martial warlock option, this is a good choice if you want to incorporate Fi into your character.

Link’s Toy Chest

Hero’s Sword - Longsword (+1-3) Mirror Shield - Repulsion Shield Hero’s Bow - Oathbow Gale Boomerang - Storm Boomerang Fire Rod - Wand of Fireballs (requires spellcasting) Mastersword - Sword of Zariel, Holy Avenger Longsword* Hylian Shield - Shield of the Hidden Lord  Goddess Bow - Ephixis, Bow of Nylea Golden Gauntlets - Gauntlets of Ogre Power Zora Tunic - Cloak of the Manta Ray Pegasus Boots - Boots of Speed Hover Boots - Boots of Levitation Hook Shot - Rope of Climbing

SIDEKICKS

Sidekicks are a new edition from Tasha’s that let Link bring allies on his hero’s journey. Experts are skill monkeys who focus on Help actions, Spellcasters dip into the INT, WIS, or CHA spell lists, and Warriors are trained to fight and don’t have to talk, so they can be animals.

Epona - Defender Warrior Riding Horse Navi - Expert or Healer Spellcaster Sprite Sidon - Attacker Warrior Merfolk Sheik - Expert Noble (Elf) Wolf Link - Attacker Warrior Wolf

Theros Piety

The Piety System from Theros lets us be devout to a god and earn features from worshiping them. As far as I’m aware, this is an optional feature, and not every DM will make use of these, but if you’re able to, here’s a handy guide. These gods really stood out as the clear choices for Link to go with.

Iroas - God of Victory

Domains: War Virtues: Achieve a great victory, Overcome slim odds honorably, Defeat a foe in single combat, Perform a great feat of strength or skill Sins: Being a coward in battle, Beat an honorable foe through deceit, harm innocents Piety Bonus: +3 Learn Compelled Duel spell +10 Learn Crusader’s Mantle spell +25 For 1 minute, creatures cannot gain advantage on you +50 Increase STR or CHA by 2 to a max of 22

Keranos - God of Storms

Domains: Knowledge, Tempest Virtues: Solve a riddle or puzzle, defeat an unwise enemy, plan ahead for an upcoming challenge, build or restore a temple to Keranos Sins: Jeopardize others through foolishness, ignore a wise course of action, fail to plan for a challenge, give in to anger or self-destruction

Piety Bonus: +3 Add 1d6 lightning damage to melee attack up to INT mod turns. +10 Reroll a failed INT or WIS saving throw +25 Advantage on Initiative rolls +50 Increase INT or WIS by 2 to a max of 22

Nylea - Goddess of the Wild

Domains: Nature Virtues: Help any wild animal, stop those who hunt for sport or profit, win an archery competition, slay an aberration, fiend, or undead Sins: Kill an animal without reason, Dedicate a building to or make a sacrifice for any god (including Nylea), protect a city from a natural disaster

Piety Bonus: +3 Learn Hunter’s Mark +10 Learn Speak with Animals +25 Attacking creatures must pass DC 15 WIS save or change targets. +50 Increase DEX or WIS by 2 to a max of 22

Cunning Tactician

Battle Master Fighter (12) Inquisitive Rogue (8) Fighting Style: Dueling Maneuvers: Brace, Disarming Strike, Feinting Attack, Parry, Precision Attack, Riposte, Sweeping Attack Tools: Thieves’ Tools, Mason’s Tools

While Link is brave and strong, he is most defined by his clever mind and unorthodox solutions to boss fights. With this class split, Link has prioritized strategy and tactics over everything else. While it leaves him a little squishier, Link is still a very capable warrior. As a Battle Master, he got a free tool proficiency. Mason’s Tools allows Link to find secret passageways in stone walls, which most dungeons tend to be made of. On top of that, with his Feinting Attack, Link can give himself advantage, meaning he can use Sneak Attack even in a 1v1 fight, which fits his solo adventurer playstyle.

One-Man Army

Battle Master Fighter (12) Hunter Ranger (8) Fighting Style: Dueling, Archery Maneuvers: Brace, Disarming Strike, Feinting Attack, Parry, Precision Attack, Riposte, Sweeping Attack Hunter’s Prey: Colossus Slayer, Multiattack Defense Tools: Mason’s Tools

I used this build once in a level 10 campaign. 6 levels of Fighter, 4 levels of Ranger with a +2 Longsword, and let me tell you something. This build creamed the competition, which was the other PCs at the table, who were also built as level 10 characters. Link nearly defeated his first opponent in a single round, dealing around 70 damage between his four attacks. When I say this is Link’s “power” build, I mean it. I didn’t even sweat when an adult blue dragon showed up after the tournament ended, that’s how much faith I had in Link’s ability to fight. I honestly forgot to even use Link’s battle maneuvers, he was just dealing so much damage that it slipped my mind. You could swap Battle Master for Cavalier, but for me, the Battle Master is more accurate to Link’s favor of techniques over basic hack-and-slash.

RANGER SPELLS

1 Absorb Elements, Ensnaring Strike, Hunter’s Mark 2 Cordon of Arrows, Healing Spirit

The Hero of Hyrule

Battle Master Fighter (12) Glory Paladin (8) Fighting Style: Archery, Dueling Maneuvers: Brace, Disarming Strike, Feinting Attack, Parry, Precision Attack, Riposte, Sweeping Attack Tools: Mason’s Tools

As a Glory Paladin, Link is driven by a desire to be a legendary hero, and at least in the UA version, the Glory Paladin served the gods, as Link does. Like the two builds above, Link balances the brute might of the Glory Paladin with the tactile diversity of the Battle Master.

PALADIN SPELLS

1 Cure Wounds, Divine Favor, Guiding Bolt, Heroism, Protection from Evil and Good, Searing Smite, Thunderous Smite, Wrathful Smite 2 Branding Smite, Enhance Ability, Find Steed, Magic Weapon, Warding Bond

Oaths and Promises

Glory Paladin (12) Celestial Warlock (8) Fighting Style: Dueling Pact: Blade Invocations: Eldritch Smite, Improved Pact Weapon, Maddening Hex, Relentless Hex

The builds from here on are more for the flavor than necessarily Link’s character. As a Blade Pact Paladock, Link becomes a CHA-focused martial with some extra spell slots that turn his smiting sword strikes into a bokoblin slurry machine. This build focuses Link more as a servant of the gods than anything else. Just make sure he has the Hex spell, but you can replace Maddening Hex with Agonizing Blast if you want to use the Master Sword laser beam at full potential.

PALADIN SPELLS

1 Divine Favor, Guiding Bolt, Heroism, Protection from Evil and Good, Searing Smite, Thunderous Smite, Wrathful Smite 2 Branding Smite, Enhance Ability, Find Steed, Magic Weapon, Warding Bond 3 Blinding Smite, Crusader’s Mantle, Elemental Weapon, Haste, Protection from Energy

WARLOCK SPELLS

C Blade Ward, Booming Blade, Sword Burst 1 Armor of Agathys, Cure Wounds, Hex 2 Lesser Restoration, Misty Step, Shatter 3 Spirit Shroud, Summon Fey 4 Galder’s Speedy Courier

To Serve and Protect

Battle Master Fighter (12) Crown Paladin (8) Fighting Style: Dueling, Interception Maneuvers:  Bait and Switch, Brace, Disarming Strike, Goading Strike, Parry, Riposte, Sweeping Attack Tools: Mason’s Tools

Link is Zelda’s knight, bodyguard, and servant. So this build prioritizes features that makes Link the loyal emissary of the Princess of Hyrule. As such, this build changes Link’s role to be more of a defender to the princess than a solo hero. This build assumes that the princess or someone else who needs to be protected is joining Link on his adventure.

PALADIN SPELLS

1 Command, Cure Wounds, Divine Favor, Heroism, Compelled Duel, Searing Smite, Thunderous Smite, Wrathful Smite 2 Branding Smite, Find Steed, Warding Bond, Zone of Truth

After all is said and done, I hope I gave everyone a lot to work with. Of course my suggestions are not law, and if nothing else, I hope it gives you an idea of how you want to build him. Last time I built Link, I gave one set build for him, but I still laid out other options. Recently though, I’ve been trying to show multiple builds at the end of my build posts to offer a wider idea of what building a character can look like. Happy 2021 everyone, and let’s hope this year goes smoother.

[plutoisaplanet16]

21 Reasons to Love Someone

(Damien Haas x reader)

#1. Their Smile 

Word count: 1,644

Warnings: none (SFW)

Buy me a coffee

Two words: Defy Media.

     At first excitement coursed Damien’s being as he thought about the prospect of having a job where he could sit around and play games all day. However, it did not take him long to feel the same way everybody else in the office did. You knew the pressure took a toll on him when the first thing he did after work was sleep. Damien’s personality shined through on camera, but being the entertaining ball of sunshine for so many videos each day overwhelmed him. When he came home he would say a mindless “hello y/n” and perhaps jokingly say “hello my baby geese” to Freyja and Zelda, but after that he would close the door to the bedroom and plop down on the bed. Sometimes he wouldn’t even bother to take his shoes off. Usually you would just leave him alone for a couple hours until you finished making dinner or the postmate had arrived.

“How was work?” you would ask as you handed him his meal.

He would always tell you, “It was good, but I won’t go into detail. Too much happened today; I’ll probably miss something if I try to tell you.”

     Damien would always laugh it off and pretend like it was nothing, but you knew better than to buy into his nightly act. After nearly a year and half of dating, you knew what Damien did when something bothered him. Comedy was his coping mechanism, but after the bright laughter ceased, his face fell into a blank expression: the sparkle in his eyes dulled, his normally rosy complexion seemingly drained in an instant, and lastly, silence filled the room. It was quite frankly the most bizarre phenomenon to behold. All you wanted to do was grab his soft face and kiss his forehead to try and convince him that everything would work out, but this wasn’t a fanfiction or a cheesy romantic comedy. People are more complicated than that.

     So that’s how you ended up awake at 3:17 a.m. scouring the internet for Harry Potter house robe cat costumes. Your dry eyes and blurry vision did not deter you from finding that one Esty shop that would grant you wish. Was each costume going to be $45 plus shipping? Yes. But did that stop you? No. This was a mission of love, and for Damien, you would go any distance to see that adorable goober genuinely smile.You were just about to place the order when Damien’s arm pulled you closer into his chest as he looked over your shoulder. Without thinking, you stupidly threw your phone across the room. Luckily it landed in a soft, plushy chair in the corner of the room. 

“Y/n, what was that about?” Damien shook his head. 

You struggled to find an answer, “Um...uh...”

“Do I even want to know?” he chuckled, “As long as it’s not Tinder I don’t care enough to lose any more sleep.”

“I would never cheat on you!” you exclaimed.

He sleepily mumbled, “I know. I’m too sexy.”

     You laughed to yourself as you left the bed to go retrieve your hopefully-not-cracked-phone. You quickly placed the order and crawled back into bed. It was rare that Damien ever complimented himself like that. It reminded you of the Damien you knew before Defy... the Damien who ruffled his hair and smoldered at the camera for a selfie. It was so nice to hear Damien still have his moments of confidence. It gave you hope that your plan would actually work.

5:15 pm. It was almost time.

     You had just finished making dinner, and you rushed to set the table neatly. To be honest, what you made shouldn’t even really be considered dinner because it was more or less a buffet of different movie food such as: M&Ms, twizzlers, chips and homemade dip, tiny sandwiches, and of course popcorn. You arranged them into a deliciously looking spread in the finest plastic bowls the dollar store had to offer. (Neither one of you would really want to do dishes anyway.) Once it looked perfect you turned towards the living room to hunt down Freyja and Zelda. You had the costumes neatly folded on the top of the  grey, cloth couch. Luckily Freyja was napping on the cushion below them; you petted her gently and unfolded her Ravenclaw house robes. She yawned and stretched right as you were about to wake her. Her eyes fluttered open, and she sniffed the robe. Freyja backed away and her big, glossy eyes moved back and forth between you and the costume.

“It’s for Daddy, okay? Work with me here, please Freyja.”

     She meowed back like she understood, and from then on she was compliant. Next, you had to hunt down Zelda. It honestly amazed you how well that chonky cat could hide. You called out her name for what felt like forever until you yelled that Damien would be home soon. A small meow came from underneath the couch.

“Just what am I to you guys?”

Zelda came out and before she even knew what was happening, you squeezed her into her Hufflepuff robes, “Finally.” 

      Everything was almost perfect; the last thing you had to do was put on your own house robes and get all eight Harry Potter movies out of storage. Sure you would never be able to finish them all in one night, but both of you would give it a valiant attempt. Digging the movies out of the bin would prove to be a challenge because both of you were giant nerds that for some reason decided to just throw all your nerdiness into several boxes and NOT label them. In the fourth of six boxes is where you found the first three movies, and the rest were at the bottom of the fifth box. You decided that after all this was over you and Damien were sure to be doing some serious decluttering for the next week or so. Meanwhile, you had to go light some spooky looking candles, somehow avoid going ahead and digging into the scrumptious food, and put the first DVD in the console. 

     As the first movie finally loaded, Damien unlocked the door and walked in, “It smells like a theatre in here. What happ-”

     He stopped dead in his tracks when saw you with the Sorting Hat on your head and your Harry Potter robes. His face was full of wonder and confusion as he took a couple seconds to slowly look around and examine his surroundings. He giggled at the spooky yet romantic lighting as well as Hedwig’s Theme rattling the walls of the apartment. You hoped you two wouldn’t get noise complaints...again. Damien walked closer towards you, but soon Freyja and Zelda ambushed him by rubbing themselves up against his legs.

He looked down in disbelief, “Freyja...Zelda? Y/n?”

“I’m glad you know all our names,” you teased.

“What is all this? Their costumes? The candles? The food? Harry Potter?” he sat down on the floor next to you.

“Listen Damien, I know something has been up with you these past couple of weeks. I know you love Smosh and your job, and it doesn’t make sense to me why you would be hiding how you really feel from me,” you said.

“Y/n,” he sighed, “It’s complicated, okay? Half the time I don’t even know what’s going through my head when it comes to talking about my day. You are right. I love my job, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. However, I’m having a tough time right now. There are a lot of videos we film in one day, and for someone like me it can easily become too much. The biggest issue is our parent company itself never listening to us; it is so frustrating. I don’t like spreading that kind of negativity so I shove it away, but it seems it has still affected you. It’s hard for me to talk about, and honestly, I just want to figure it out on my own. I don't want to bring you down with me.”

You were kind of hurt that he didn’t feel comfortable telling you everything but you had to respect him, “It’s okay Damien. I won’t push you, but please let me in on some things. I hate sitting here watching you be miserable not being able do a single thing about it. I want to help you, and that’s why I did all this. Sometimes you walk in here, and it’s like I don’t even know who I am looking at. I believe you will find your footing at Smosh, and everyone will soon adore you. I know it didn’t take me long to fall in love with you.”

Damien blushed, “Oh really?”

     He smiled. He actually smiled. It was a complete 100% authentic goofy Damien smile that spread from ear to ear. He felt happiness deep down inside because of you, and that is all you could ever ask for. Being the ooey-gooey romantic person you are, you threw yourself onto him and gave him a big kiss on the forehead. No, that kiss wouldn’t really fix much, but it made both of your hearts melt. When you pulled away you looked at his face again; he was still smiling, but it wasn’t the same as it was a moment ago. Instead of bright and bubbly, it was a small adoring grin. His eyes bore into yours, and it was like everything else around you two disappeared. 

“Y/n?” he asked.

You answered, “Yes?”

He pulled you into his chest and tightly wrapped his arms around you. His soft heartbeat became like white nose to you, “How come you fell in love with me so fast?”

You pulled away from him and kissed his lips, “How could I not with that smile of yours?”

---------------

Hello! This is my first Smosh fanfiction I have ever wrote. I’m not new to the fanfiction writing world. I’ve had two wattpad accounts and even wrote on a BTS fan app for a while. I dropped this hobby of mine to focus on my senior year of high school. Recently though I have come back to writing due to being stuck in the house and my school year being pretty much over. I decided to start this prompt series because I was bored and itching to write something again. I hope you all have enjoyed this short imagine. It is part one of a twenty-one part prompt list that I have made up myself.

This specific list will, for now, only include past and present Smosh members, but if you would like to see any of these prompts for other fictional characters or  real people please let me know in my inbox! I have no requests, and I would certainly love some. Thank you all for reading this! 

[katedoesfics]

Shadows of Hyrule | Chapter 68

Mipha and Urbosa joined Link in Daruk’s room, and before long, Zelda, too, had appeared to join them. After a few minutes of casual conversation, Link met Zelda’s gaze, and she quietly signaled to the door.

In the hallway, Zelda’s voice was hushed as she spoke with Link, informing him of her own confrontation with Dorian which was surprisingly similar to Link’s.

“I don’t like it,” she said, shaking her head. “If you ask me, there’s something going on with him, and it sounds like Impa may not even be aware.”

Link crossed his arms and glanced down the hall. “What about the Guardians?” he asked. “If we don’t get rid of them now, we won’t stand a damn chance.”

“I agree,” Zelda said. “As far as I know, our army has it all under control. The attacks were sudden. There have been a few casualties, but nothing compared to what it could have been. They’re being destroyed, and the Sheikah have gone out to try to find any others that may remain, above ground and underground. The Guardians will be a thing of the past.”

It was the first reassuring thing Link had heard in a while. At the very least, it proved that not all of the Sheikah were suspicious. Whatever was going on with Dorian, or even Impa, it seemed the others were innocent, at least for now. If they were willing to prevent the Guardians from being an issue in the future, than that had to count for something. Maybe.

There were a lot of unanswered questions. It made Link’s stomach knot with anxiety. But there was nothing he could do about it. Not yet, anyway. Their main objective still remained their first priority; prepare for Ganondorf’s return, defeat him, and seal him away, which would hopefully lead to the sealing of the final portal. With all of that taken care of, there would be time to worry about everything else.

Mipha emerged from Daruk’s room. “I’m going to check on Revali,” she said.

Link frowned. “Why?”

“Because he’s our friend,” Mipha said with a frown.

“He is?”

Zelda grinned. “Yeah, that’s news to me.”

Urbosa came into the hall behind Mipha, an arm on her hip. “Me too,” she said. “But I did promise him a bag of chips from the machine.” She shrugged, then lead the way down the hall to Revali’s room, stopping to retrieve his snack first.

Inside his room, she tossed the bag of chips onto his lap, and he eagerly ripped into them. He licked the salt off of his fingers and sighed.

“I don’t remember the last time I ate,” he said before emptying the contents into his mouth.

“How are you feeling?” Mipha asked.

Revali pressed at his temples with his fingers. “Fine. Except for this headache. Comes and goes.” He looked up as Link came in and sighed. “Oh, look,” he mumbled. “There it is.”

“Well, that’s enough Revali for me for one day,” Link said, turning on his heels, but Urbosa grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

“Why can’t you two just get along?”

“What’s some teasing between friends, hm?” Revali said.

“He’s right,” Link said with a nod. “We’re best friends. Didn’t you know?”

“Well, that might be pushing it,” Urbosa muttered.

“Not at all,” Link said, grinning. “Because Revali saved my life, didn’t you, Buddy?”

Revali regarded him carefully. Link was up to something. “I would not do it again,” he said. “It really hurt.”

“Yeah, but you did do it.”

Revali rolled his eyes. “And I regret doing it so much.”

Link frowned. “Revali, you're ruining this.”

“Come over here so I can slug you,” Revali barked.

“Get out of that bed, Asshole.”

Revali sighed and leaned back against the bed. “Too much effort. I’ll kill you later.”

“Well, this is nice,” Urbosa said. She rolled her eyes. “Glad your near death experience made you a better person.”

Revali peered into his empty bag of chips and laughed. “Near death? Please. I was faking. Had to make Link feel bad.” He frowned and attempted to get the last of the crumbs into his hand.

“Right,” Zelda said, crossing her arms. “Let’s get out of here,” she said to Urbosa, turning back to the door.

“Thanks for visiting, come back soon,” Revali said dryly as Urbosa and Mipha turned to follow Zelda out of the room.

“Whatever,” Link muttered, turning to follow suit, but Revali stopped him, his face serious.

“What’s your plan?” Revali said to him, narrowing his gaze.

Link hesitated. “Not die?”

Revali nodded thoughtfully. “That’s a good start,” he said. His eyes moved to the door, as if checking to make sure no one was in earshot. “What do you know?”

“Nothing,” Link answered slowly.

“Don’t play games with me,” Revali hissed. “I know you know something. And it has to do with Dorian and Impa.”

Link said nothing, but this was enough for Revali.

“I don’t trust them, either,” he said. “Let’s get on the same page; from here on out, they’re out of the picture.”

Link turned his gaze away and looked out the door.

Sensing his unease, Revali settled back into the bed and busied himself with the empty chip bag once more. “Besides. We’re Hyrule’s Champions. We don’t need them. Not with me around saving everyone’s damn lives.”

“Right,” Link said. He glanced at Revali. “Just keep your beak shut.”

“Aye, aye, Captain.”

Link’s lips pulled up at the corners, sneering at Revali.

“Come on, man, don’t you trust me?” Revali whined. He flashed him a grin, then his expression turned serious once more. “Stop trying to get fucking killed, alright?”

Link shrugged. “K,” he said, turning back to the door. “See ya.” Behind him, he heard Revali crumple the empty back of chips, and it landed softly on the floor beside the trash.

*****

By late afternoon, the Champions were officially discharged from the hospital. Impa was all too eager to get rid of their ‘sorry asses’ and with a wave of her hand, the seven of them found themselves back at the shrine. The setting sun shone on the shrine on the hill, just in their eyes, but the warmth of the rays was welcomed on their faces.

After a brief discussion between the Champions, it was determined that there was nothing more they could do but wait for Ganondorf’s arrival, whenever that may be. It didn’t seem ideal to be playing the waiting game, but they had done all they could to prepare for the war and give themselves every advantage they could. So, they parted ways for the evening, each of them eager to return home to their beds and catch up on much needed sleep.

Link, however, was not particularly anxious to get home and try to act like everything was fine in the world. Still reeling with the emotions of the last twenty-four hours, he much preferred being alone to his own thoughts, without the interrogations of his father, or even the worries of his innocent sister, who seemed to know more than she lead on. But with no where else to go, he simply wandered the streets of the city until he ended up in the driveway, looking up at the house.

He blew heavily out of his nose and opted to sit on the trunk of his father’s car over going inside. But his presence had not gone unnoticed, and within a few minutes, his father poked his head outside. He stepped out into the cool night air, bringing with him two beer bottles. His father sat beside him on the car, passing him the opened bottle. Link took it without a word and quickly finished the entirety of it.

“Alcoholism is a good career choice, too,” his father said. “Goes well with the title of hero.”

“I learned from the best,” Link muttered.

“Don’t learn from my mistakes,” he said. “I’m a bad role model.”

“I know.”

His father sighed. He was quiet for a moment, sipping his beer, before he spoke again. “Did I ever tell you about my last deployment?”

Link glanced at his father. He never spoke of his time in the army. “No.”

“It was shortly after your mother found out she was pregnant with Ary,” he said. “And when she got sick. I had been in and out for the last year, but they decided to let me go home for good. You know, right after one last mission.” He paused to drink, then used his bottle to point at his son. “King Roham spent a long time trying to find that sword,” he said. “Before anyone else could get their hands on it first.”

“Like the Yiga Clan?”

“They’ve been a thorn in our side for years,” his father said. “And they were just as set on finding it as we were.” He drank again. “They ambushed us while a few of us were in Faron doing some scouting. And you know how the Sheikah are. Now imagine a rogue Sheikah with vengeance in his eyes. Those motherfuckers don’t stop at nothing.” His father grinned. “But we had Dorian on our side. Hell, we hardly went anywhere without him. We would have all been six feet under long ago if it weren’t for him.” He paused and his smile faded. “You know, all I wanted to do was go home. I was so done with it all. And I was certain in that moment, I was going to die. There was no walking away from a Yiga ambush, that was just the fact of life. But I was also ready to die. For your mother. For you. For Aryll.” He leaned back on one arm and finished his beer.

Link’s brows furrowed. Where the hell was he going with this?

“Are you so willing to do the same?”

“Yes,” he said.

“That’s idiotic, Link. It didn’t take me long to realize how stupid that was, and you need to understand that, too. You’re no good to them - to anyone - dead. If you die, your friends are doomed to die anyway. If you want them to survive this, you need to survive. You need to fight and end this.”

“Easier said than done,” Link muttered.

His father’s voice softened. “Yeah.” He pushed himself off the car and turned to face his son. “You’re crazy,” he said with a grin. “Running head first at a Guardian with a damn sword. The fuck is wrong with you?”

Link shrugged. “I took a chance.”

“Use your damn head once in a while,” he said.

“Sure,” Link said. “As soon as you stop stalking me.”

“It’s my job,” he said with a shrug. “And Dorian tells me everything.” With that, he left Link alone outside.

[borderhopperj]

Jesse’s Unpopular Video Game Opinions That No one Cares About and Probably Won’t Read

Note that just because I dislike something doesn’t mean that I’m attacking the people who do like it. Your opinions are no less important than mine are. 

1. Wind Waker is my favorite Zelda game. The cartoon aesthetic, the characters designs, and the ability to traverse a vast sea was so appealing to me and still is. I don’t have a Zelda game that I utterly dislike, but this was the game that cemented its way into my heart.

2. I didn’t really care for Shadow of the Colossus. Don’t get me wrong. I get why people absolutely adore this game, but it just didn’t click with me. Honestly, I enjoy watching people play it than playing it myself. The controls were awkward for me and I just didn’t find myself having fun. It probably didn’t help that I already knew the ending beforehand so any desire to push through to the end was nonexistent.

3. Undertale is a fun experience, but a pretty hollow game. Oh boy, am I going to get flack for this one. Now, I love the characters in Undertale. I love the story, the music, and the themes it represented. That being said, the game is pretty shallow because everything is fixed that you can only play the game one way, whether you pick pacifist or genocide. In pacifist, you’re always gonna be level one and in Genocide, you’re always gonna be at the level the game wants you to be at that particular time. It felt like I was dealing with the crystarium bullshit from Final Fantasy XIII all over again. Like yeah, it’s a meta-game making fun of the rpg genre, but man, what’s the fun of an rpg that you can only play one way? Kind of takes the whole “role playing” aspect away from the player, huh? Right now, most of the fun I get out of Undertale is from watching others playing it for the first time and reacting to everything, which is why I dub Undertale as a fun experience. It’s an emotional roller coaster and it excels at that, but I wish there was a bit more replayability in terms of the actual gameplay itself.

4. I...actually really liked Sonic Unleashed and didn’t mind the werehog and Chip. I mean, the werehog is completely stupid in concept, but the levels never frustrated me as it did with a lot of people. The thing that did piss me off were the bullshit medals. Granted, I haven’t played it in like 4 years so my opinion probably has changed, so who knows? That being said...

5. Also on Sonic. If it wasn’t for my rose tinted glasses, I’d probably hate the shit out of Sonic Adventure 1 if I never played it until now. Sonic Adventure 2 hasn’t aged tremendously well either, but I feel it’s still solid in a lot of regards.

6. I actually enjoy Starfox Adventures. Oh, I can see its faults and it does fucking shit all over itself in the second half, but I never thought of it as a bad game. Yeah, it’s definitely not on the top of my list when it comes to Star Fox games, but I don’t mind popping the game in every once in a while.

7. Tomba is a great fucking game. Go fucking play it! Okay, this isn’t really an unpopular opinion. I just want more people to play Tomba.

8. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? TOMBA IS ON PLAYSTATION NETWORK! THOSE PIGS AREN’T GONNA BAG THEMSELVES! GET YOUR GRANDFATHER’S FUCKING BRACELET BACK, YOU FOOLS!