#I like the idea of the members of Whitehorse all crowding around in the living room around one singular cupcake

[cruesuffix]

How would the crüe spend Micks birthday? How do you think he spent his birthday in the 70's? (With Whitehorse, post divorce 😔)

can the headcanon girl make a stunning comeback?we’ll see with this one!

Ok…in order to get back into the good graces of the general public, I’ll give you the mick mars birthday bonanza special!🎉🎊

So, i’ll probably start with whitehorse headcanons…you know just to match up with the timeline

- as we all know, mick moved into the whitehorse house once he separated from his wife, so he probably spent most of his birthdays in the band…with the band. now these assholes were very much broke and struggling so i feel like the most they’d be able to do is like buy a cupcake and put a little candle on it as a birthday cake. (but he’d still appreciate it, because at least he has somewhere to be on his birthday)

- his present? getting to stay in the house and live there of course! i think jack would probably take him out to the bar as a present. he’d only be able to buy mick one singular drink, but at least they could watch whatever band was on that night together.

- oh also this band would totally make fun of him, constantly teasing him for “getting older.” just the idea of their kid guitarist aging just makes them laugh cause he’s like 24 with a moustache and two kids, he’s practically already a middle aged man. he already looks the part at least. also they would totally give him birthday beats…so try to imagine four guys ganging up on this little ass ginger haired man, punching the shit out of his gangly arms. (i’m sorry peepaw but it’s just a bit funny ngl)

- also i kinda like the idea of harry and mick having beef, so like harry’s just passive aggressively like “oh, happy birthday…how old are you now, 85?” (even though mick was like one of the youngest members of the band during those times lmaoo)(also, if you’re wondering why im headcanoning beef between harry and mick that’s because that might actually be canon, mick in an interview quite literally said that harry had always bothered him…though harry did help finance one of the bands mick had been in after whitehorse so…maybe one sided beef ig, ok anyways sorry for the lore dump)

- there’s not much birthday celebrating for whitehorse tbh…they’d just treat it like another day. hell, they might even do a gig too, and maybe they’d make a reference to it being their guitarists birthday just so mick feels extra special that day.

The Crüe however…now that’s a different story

- when the band first starts, mick doesn’t tell them when his birthday is. when they ask all he says is “oh, you just missed it.” and nothing more.

- finally, around ‘82, someone finally gets him to tell them when it is (probably tommy, we all know he’d annoy the old man until he snapped). if he manages to tell (possibly Tommy) before his birthday, he’d probably rally the others into trying to do something nice for him. if it’s in the middle of a tour they’d probably celebrate backstage and surprise him with a gift. If they have a day off, they’d try to save up enough money to bring him to a restaurant.

- when they get more established, the celebrations become more elaborate. mick never wants to make a big fuss about his birthday (it’s just another reminder that he’s getting older)…too bad the Crüe don’t give a fuck! during the girls era the boys would definitely bring him to a strip club and pretty much set up a nice little lap dance for the old man (like i can imagine them dying of laughter at micks face when he realizes what they’ve done)…omgggg

- also, side headcanon but i can’t get rid of the idea of tommy accidentally making mention of his age (something like, “34 years old, how do ya feel?”) and then micks automatically turning around and threatening to leave and everyone’s trying to calm him down (cuts to vince going “tommy you promised you wouldn’t mention his age!!” and tommy in the background yelling “I FORGOT!!!”).

- also their gifts would become more expensive the more famous they got. guitars mick could only dream of getting, a motorbike, vacation getaways (because lord knows this man needs one with the crue around). he’s almost entirely too embarrassed to be given such expensive things and every year he keeps telling them to quit getting him things…and every year they keep ignoring him.

- they’re almost always on tour so they’re always celebrating his birthday on tour, backstage, maybe a nice dinner after a show. i like the idea of all of them huddling in one of their hotel rooms and just lighting a cake and singing happy birthday and watching in delight as the guitarist squirms in embarrassment about all the attention being on him. it would be the one and only day he lets them be as overly affectionate as they want to be towards them. as long as he can pretend it never happened after.

- now this probably couldn’t happen irl but check this: maybe the crue hasn’t acknowledged micks birthday all day. they’ve continued on like it’s a normal day. this doesn’t particularly bother mick…sort of. he is surprised the band forgot, because they sure didn’t last year! but, he pretends like it doesn’t bother him. does he wish they’d just hurry up and remember and like get it over with. (he doesn’t realize he feels forgotten, he just thinks he wants to hurry up, sing the song and eat the cake…no babes you want them to remember you exist and secretly…maybe you do want that extra affection??)

- anyways, they get onstage and start the show, and mick has to push his feelings of unease down. they really don’t remember? he pretends he doesn’t care and continues on with the show. halfway during the show they have their first break and mick is walking offstage to go wipe his face, fix his makeup, maybe have a drink or two (or four…he needs to relax and forget about his own feelings about the whole thing!) until he hears vince say his name. he looks back and sees him beckon for him. this has never happened before, so he’s automatically walking back onto the stage. vince introduces him (as if he needs to at this point) and then announces that it’s his birthday. mick is automatically shying away, trying to tell vince to stop, but before he can, vince says something and then music starts playing.

- before mick knows it, the entire crowd is singing happy birthday to him, while a couple of staff members wheel in a three tiered cake. he’s quite literally speechless. nikki and tommy walk in with the staff and they all sing together. mick is in complete and utter shock. those fuckers managed to pretend they’d forgotten all about his birthday while planning this whole thing out. all he can do is stand there with his mouth wide open as they all finish the song and the crowd starts cheering. all he can say when the mic is passed to him is; “oh my god I can’t believe this! thank you so much!” he’s like profusely thanking the audience, while pointing at the rest of the band and going “you bastard you tricked me!” of course he’ll thank all the members for this after the show (the last thing he needs is to get teary eyed on stage (someone has to keep up the “evil tough guy” schtick!). then the band takes pics with the cake, tommy wipes frosting on micks face, they all taste it and then throw chunks of cake into the audience. once the celebration is done, they continue the show. afterwards, mick lets the band hug him…as a thank you for everything ofc! (if you really want the emotionally repressed bastard to have feelings…maybe he sheds a little tear or two and talks about how that was “the nicest thing anyone’s ever done!” for him. but ofc, he’ll pretend that never happened…unless someone took a pic of the occasion!)

omg who wrote a whole damn fic in here?? (pointing at myself.) i guess it’s extremely important for me to redeem myself, but i probably yapped a bit too much! this one was real fun, i love thinking about a man who probably didn’t like celebrating his birthday much surrounding by ppl who want nothing more than to give their old man a good time. i know the crue celebrated nikkis birthday onstage once, but im not sure if they were able to celebrate any of the others birthdays onstage as well. i would also like to state i had top era in mind when writing that last (lengthy) headcanon…but tbh you can just imagine any other era too. anyways i hope you enjoyed this one, think of it as a distraction from that slop i posted like two hours ago!