#I like half asleep rn so I’m sorry if this makes no sense

[reds-hoodies]

You see, I can’t stop thinking about how Jason would rest his head on your chest when you two are cuddling.

He likes to listen to your heart beat.

It grounds him.

Maybe he’s had a bad day. Maybe nothing special happened at all. But either way, at the end of the day, he’ll be seeking you out.

Because Jason’s life is crazy. And yes, he’s proud of what he does and who he is, but sometimes (a lot of the time) he can’t stop thinking about…Everything.

He thinks about the nightmares. About everything he’s lost. About the hollow space in his chest that never quite fills. And how sometimes, the world is just too loud. Too much.

But when he lays his head against your chest and listens to your heartbeat, it all quiets.

It’s a proof of life. Proof that you’re still here. Proof that he is, too.

And when you run your fingers through his hair and press a kiss to his temple; When you just hold him, steady and warm, and let him listen-

He finally lets go. Of the noise, of the ghosts, of the weight he carries.

(And though he’ll never admit it, that’s some of the best damn sleep he’s ever gotten.)

[stunie]

evie!! i haven’t been able to stop thinking about the sakaki twins since reading your “first times gotta be soft” hcs :,) like at first i was just like “yeah they’re cute” and moved on with my day but your writing has put them in my brain 🙇‍♀️ i just wanted you to know fjbdjdj

hope youre having a good day/night!! :D

hiiii hiii mothe !!! i wish you saw the face i made when i read your ask. as of right now i am more like this

they are cute huh !!! idk if i’ve ever written smut with the only dialogue being from the reader themselves so it was definitely new :’) i’m glad it ended up okay !!!

[moonstruckme]

Hi Mae! I was in a car accident yesterday (car took most of the damage, I’m ok other than bruises and sore muscles) and the whole thing has been a whirlwind of insurance and hospital and half asleep crying. I was wondering if I could request James potter x reader for comfort in a situation like that? I’m going through it rn lol hope you’re having a good day :)

Oh I'm sorry lovely! I had a very similar thing happen a little over a year ago, it's sooooo exhausting even when luckily no one is seriously hurt. Thanks for requesting, hope you're having a good/better day too <33

cw: past car accident, no details but talk of general aftermath of police questioning, insurance, etc.

James Potter x fem!reader ♡ 799 words

The way James half-jogs up to the automatic doors of the hospital, seeming caught between walking and running, feels like someone is pressing down on the bruise of your chest. You wish you’d called him sooner. 

“James,” you call as he comes in, hating how your voice cuts through the taut quiet of the waiting area. It’s worth it for how his whole self softens when his eyes find you. 

He slows to a fast walk the rest of the way to you, the urgency slowly leaving him—which is appropriate, there is no urgency, everything has happened already—like an engine running out of gas. You stand as he nears, and both of you reach for each other before James hesitates. His hands stop midair, his brow tightening for a moment, before they come tentatively to your elbows.

“Hi,” he says, squeezing. “How bad is it?” 

“For me or the car?” you joke. 

“You.” James is feeling too earnest for joking, it seems. “Well, both of you. But you first.” 

You really thought you’d cry when you saw him. Worried you’d make a whole scene, blubbering and inconsolable, but you don’t seem to have any tears left. It makes sense, you suppose; you’ve cried a lot in the past few hours. First the slow, shaky kind right after getting out of your car, and then a real cry when a police officer had pulled you aside to get your version of events. (It had been embarrassing. She’d been nice about it, though.) Now, you wait for the tears to come, but for all your relief at seeing your boyfriend you feel rather dried up. 

It makes you wish, once again, that you’d called James sooner. You’d wanted to, of course, but you’d been nearly certain you’d be even less capable of holding yourself together if he were there, and there wasn’t much reason for him to be anyways. He was at work and you weren’t terribly hurt, so there was really nothing he could have done while you were talking to the police and the tow company and the paramedics and attempting not to drown in an overwhelm of insurance information. The only thing you really wanted him for was to hold your hand.

“I’m okay,” you say, the necessary preface. “A bit bruised up. My chest got the worst of it.” 

Unconsciously, your hand comes to your sternum as if to demonstrate, gravitating towards the center of the ache. James’ hand follows, seemingly just as thoughtless as it covers your own. He can’t see the bruise, but he makes a low, sad sound anyway. 

His care softens your voice. “They said my neck will probably hurt tomorrow, but it doesn’t yet.” 

“Oh, sweetheart.” James sounds really, truly heartbroken for you. “And the rest, it hurts a lot?” 

You shrug. What’s a lot? You know you could’ve had worse, much worse; still, you could do without that frightening soreness that comes with each breath. 

“It’s not too bad,” you say. “I could still hug.” 

It’s the question he’s been dying to ask, clearly. James’ arms are around you in a second, ardent but still gentle, palms pressing to the high and low points of your bag. It’s a good hug. You melt a little against him. 

James tucks his face into the side of your neck, like he’s trying to get as much contact with you as he can. “I wish you’d called me when it happened.” 

“You were at work.” 

“I’d have left work.” 

“There wasn’t anything you could do. I was fine, I just had to…” a little sigh escapes you, exhaustion creeping in now that he’s here “...talk to people. Insurance and all that.” 

James makes a soft, half-agreeing sound. His thumb strokes the base of your neck. “Still. I could have held your hand.” 

A new ache rises in the back of your throat, coming to join the rest. You wind your arms tighter around James. 

After a few, silent moments, he kisses your neck chastely and loosens his hold. “Ready to go home? Anything else you need?” 

You shake your head. “I’m signed out,” you say, so eager you feel like you could float out the doors. You hope you can entice James to lie in bed with you when you get home. You think you’ll sleep until tomorrow. “Let’s go, please.” 

“Alright, you don’t have to say please, sweetheart.” James curls an arm around your shoulders, pressing a smile into your cheek. “We can go. You need one of those wheelchairs for me to take you out to the car?” 

“Ha ha,” you say drily. “No.” 

“Just checking. Think maybe I ought to ask for one, just in case?”

“James. I will take your car home without you in it.” 

“Alright, lovie, I’m coming.”

[bloodlustngore]

Safe space - Vanessa Shelly

Another Vanessa fic? I’m hyper-fixating atm so it’s to be expected.

In the middle of writing a Vanessa x fem!reader smut so for now you can all have another fluff one (with a tiny bit of suggestiveness). Kinda want to get these all out before my hyper-fixation on Vanessa stops but it’s probs not gonna for a while as I’m also replaying Security Breach rn.

Also sorry if this one is shit lol or doesn’t make sense half of these I write sleep deprived.

Summary: Vanessa comes home, stressed. She just wants comfort from Y/n.

This is a Vanessa x fem!reader one-shot :)

God, this might shift and patrol was stressful. Vanessa found out that her father employed another security guard...she was worried and she also had to go meet him, and check up on how he was doing.

Vanessa just wanted to sleep, which was unusual for the blonde, because she rarely could...mostly she just wanted to be at home with her girlfriend, her safe space. She was relieved when she could come home, it was four in the morning and she knew her girlfriend would be asleep.

It had been pouring it down with rain tonight and luckily Y/n convinced Vanessa to wear her long water proof coat. But that still didn't stop her much from getting her hair wet a bit, since she forgot to put the hood up.

Locking the door behind her and getting in her routine habit of checking all the rooms downstairs at home, everything was locked. Vanessa did this because she was scared that something could happen to Y/n...considering Vanessa' father is William Afton, after all. Vanessa knew he could easily use her girlfriend against her. And that's why she was scared to get too close to someone but it was too late now, it had been since she first met Y/n two years ago.

Her father hadn't threatened her with Y/n yet...but it was still a possibility if she didn't do as he asked, anymore.

Vanessa headed upstairs after putting her coat away and took off her shoes, if she didn't Y/n would have her head. Leaving her bag down stairs but she still took her gun with her, in case. Y/n had one to...because she knew what she'd gotten herself into getting close to Vanessa.

The blonde stripped off her cop uniform, and threw in an old t-shirt with lounge shorts. Taking her hair out of the pony tail and into a messy bun instead. She glanced over at Y/n who was fast asleep, as she turned the lamp on at her side of the bed.

Crawling into bed, Vanessa turned off the lamp, cuddling up to her girlfriend and wrapping an arm around her stomach, protectively. Suddenly Y/n stirred awake, turning over to face Vanessa. "Nessa, you're home" she smiled tiredly, her eyes slowly opened.

"I'm glad you're back. I missed you." Y/n' voice was a bit groggily from the fact she's still tired and just woke up. "I missed you too baby, it's been a hell of a night. But we can talk about it in the morning." Vanessa paused as she kissed the tip of Y/n' nose.

"Okay. C'mere" Y/n chuckled, tiredly. Vanessa was already so close to her as it is, until the blonde understood what Y/n was after, she closed the gap between their faces and kissed Y/n' lips. The kiss was soft and full of passion, then Y/n kissed back making it sloppy due to her tiredness.

Vanessa was so tempted to get on top of Y/n but she stayed at the side, kissing her. Knowing that if they started this now, there would be no sleep for either of them for a while. Their kiss continued, breathing heavy, Vanessa made Y/n moan into the kiss slightly when her hand squeezed her inner thigh, prompting the blonde to deepen the kiss with her tongue.

Vanessa pulled away eventually, both women's chests heaving, a strand of saliva connected until they broke apart. "As much as I'd like to continue Y/n, we need to get some rest."

Y/n chuckled "yeah you're right." Pausing to check her phone "fuck me it's four a.m."

Vanessa smirked at her girlfriend "tempting..."

Y/n rolled her eyes "cheeky. But you need rest, babe."

"Fine. Goodnight Y/n. I love you."

"I love you too Nessa" she kissed her softly, wrapping her arms around Y/n once again, feeling happy that she's in the company of her girlfriend, and that she gets to cuddle with her for the rest of the night...or early morning.

[remotepixel]

Hey could I please request headcannons for how Marc and Steven would act as yandads?

Hi!! Thank you for requesting, and sorry this took longer than normal. I have mocks rn and some important exams in May and overall struggling to correctly manage my time lol.

Tw: Yanderes themes + off-hand mentions of kidnapping.

Steven:

-Panic is his main mood when dealing with you; he honestly has no clue what he’s doing.

-He’ll be the one you’re around most, and normally the one to deal out any consequences for your actions (the worst you’re getting is a ‘stern warning’ and a ten-minute timeout because he feels bad).

-He’s never risen a child before, and there’s not really any textbooks about how to parent a kid your alter kidnapped. I definitely get that vibe he would read mummy blogs though out of pure desperation (he’s trying his best </3).

-Steven is a big pushover. He’ll weakly defend himself if anyone accuse him - stating he’s just trying to make you happy - but it’s obvious enough that even he can’t defend himself properly.

-He’s pretty easily manipulated through your emotions. If you start crying, or even look slightly sad, the guy immediately backpedals on whatever it was.

-Since he’s super into Ancient Egypt, he knows how important interests can be. He’ll research into what like to try and make conversation. He’ll fully support any hobbies, skills, etc and try his best to support you if he’s able to.

-While writing this, I got this image of Steven, at like fucking 2am, half-asleep, trying desperately to understand all your ‘GenZ’ references like he’s studying some ancient literature. It’s an excuse to talk to you so he’ll take it, but god he wished you were a Ennead fanatic or something to make this a bit easier.

-He gives the vibe of randomly dropping some phrases that he hears you say to try and bond. He’ll probably give up after the first time though because you just stared blankly at him and he couldn’t deal with the embarrassment.

Marc:

-I guess it makes sense but Marc and Steven are both pretty similar in this situation, Marc just likes putting up a ‘i’m in control’ façade because he can’t correctly deal with his emotions (same).

-He’s even more scared than Steven, just better at hiding it. Obviously, his view on parental figures has been greatly screwed over by his own childhood, and despite vowing to himself he would never be the same, he always worries that he’ll cross that line.

-I think out of the two of them, he’d probably be the one to kidnap you, assuming that’s what happened, but he’ll be distant at the start.

-It’s not that he doesn’t want to comfort you, he just has no clue how to do it. And he will much rather show his love in his own way than mess up with his words.

-You’ll find little things you like around the apartment, or your favourite food just happens to be the one he brought for tonight.

-Honestly, I think he’ll also be a pushover. As much as he probably shits on Steven for being so, he can’t stand to see you disappointed, and he doesn’t have the ‘luxury’ (he never asks) of speaking to you everyday like Steven does.

-After a few months, he’ll start to be more open - small smiles, etc etc - but it depends on you mostly. If you seem happier, he’ll take over the body more, maybe for a movie night or a board game.

-If you’re just as or more angry/sad than at the start, he’s remaining firmly inside the headspace when you’re around. He’d rather live through Steven than have to confront the familiarly haunting look on your face.

A bit random but I have this cute thought of them putting more mirrors (or just any sort of reflective surface) around the apartment so both of them can hang out with you, even if only one can control the body.

[demonir]

Welcome to Adrian’s good omens thoughts while he’s half asleep again, on todays episode I want to talk about how important the gender expression in the show is to me

Don’t mind the typos I’m lying down without my glasses

I really appreciate how subtle they are about characters genders and stuff, characters with commonly male names being played by actresses and they still use stuff like “sir” or “lord” even if they also get referred to as they/them. They don’t make an intense effort to make them look incredibly androgynous either which like- idk it’s nice.

Knowing neither angels or demons have a defined gender also feels so so so nice because it comes paired with the fact they still choose to present in specific ways and use specific pronouns because newsflash bozo someone can be nonbinary or agender and still present masc as fuck or fem as fuck and use either he/him or she/her and if they wake up 2 weeks from now and change that they are still valid.

Which takes me to my second favorite point, Crowley’s change in gender presentation. I know we all know or at the very least agree he’s genderfluid but like I want to highlight the way he does it because it means so much to me. He has obviously chosen to be masc presenting through most of history (that we’ve seen, there could still be periods of time we haven’t seen where she’s been fem) and idk abt you but I was a tumblr teen years ago learning a very skewed version of gender identity and expression where if you wanted to be genderfluid you had to look very attractive as both genders and also PASS as both genders convincingly (as well as being perfectly androgynous when being neither, this also applied to nonbinary people), as well as change it like every 2 days or so and have no preference? That’s the way people would make it seem to me, that’s the way people would portray their genderfluid characters in fandom spaces and that’s the way my teenage mind came to absorb it.

Now, it’s 2024 and I’m sure all of us with common sense know this is bogus but still seeing Crowley just sorta… brightened my everything? Knowing nanny Crowley wasn’t just for the joke, knowing that during certain scenes she was indeed being fem… but the most important part to me is that no matter what he was still HIM, they could have gone the easy route and have an actress play fem Crowley and be like “oh well she’s a demon she can shapeshift whenever ooooo” like so many people do with their ocs (I was one at one point) but it is still obviously him, it is still David Tennant playing Crowley and nobody else and when she’s fem she’s still got the same features the same everything and that’s somehow just… so freeing to see? It’s realistic, it’s grounding. You can be fem and still have overly masculine features, you can be fem and still have facial hair, you can be masc and still wear makeup, you can be masc and not hide your chest.

Now I wish this was all just… more obvious to everyone, I know some of this stuff because I saw posts, I saw people talking about it… but not everyone is gonna go through a 3 hour post scavenger hunt for extra lore like I do and these things are simply not addressed in the show. There IS a certain freeing feeling to the gender stuff not being addressed, it simply happens, it passes by and you might not even notice, but also comes with the double edged sword of people simply thinking SOME of the characters have funny genders but the others don’t.

Sorry I’m distracted rn bc I can hear a fucking bohemian rhapsody cover coming from my moms tv the timing of this is fucking wild, anyways I’m gonna try to get my thoughts back on track

So yeah, to some people like for example my aforementioned mother, the nanny Crowley thing was merely a joke and nothing else, not a brief moment of gender expression but just a perhaps even nasty joke played at the expense of other people. To her every other Crowley before and after that has been strictly cis male and mlm despite the fact I did in fact explain to her that he’s not, same applies to Aziraphale and perhaps even harder because we only ever see him presenting masculine through the entirety of it and trying to explain otherwise to the woman that thinks she can use she/he on me because I’m bisexual will not work (and she refuses to use he/him on me anyways mind you, or my chosen name. Says it’s too complicated, but I know for a fact that if one of the characters had changed their name mid show she would switch to the new name instantly…..yknow… just casual transphobia for me only)

I would like just…a passing comment or a scene that lets everyone know the nuance yknow? Finally something that cannot be disputed by everyone, and you might say “well but Crowley says he’s neither when he gets called a good lad” and to that I say yes but people still dispute the meaning behind it, my mom certainly would. And again you might want to shake the nanny scene in front of me and again I’ll remind you of people thinking it was just a joke, a disguise, a singular haha funny. You might want to gesture towards other scenes or moments or passing phrases but the thing is they will or have already been debated on because people will try to deny it no matter fucking what and it’s FRUSTRATING, so perhaps it’s just me being petty or wanting to give them a good ol fuck you but I’d like it if either Crowley or Aziraphale or both just looked at the camera head on and went “we are not men, also Crowley is genderfluid” no ifs no butts no second meaning just straight to your face, a giant “shut the fuck up” to annoying people.

Now I’m not gonna die if this doesn’t happen, I’m fine with that… it just sorta feels depressing seeing someone in the wild genuinely saying shit like “why are you using she/her for Crowley? He’s a man” my brother in Christ I am about to hit you with the mallet of knowledge and you won’t be able to look at that demon the same way ever again.

The gender expression in good omens matters so much to me as someone who struggles with her own and Crowley and Beelzebub matter so much to me as a little afab genderfluid/nonbinary (I’m not sure yet) motherfucker, I need to go bite some fuckinf ccomcrete right now man, accidental typo but I’m keeping it.

[joemama-2]

Bro ur bio says “addicted to angst (fluff if you squint)” HEAVY ON THE IF YOU SQUINT 😭😭😭

This chap was so good there is so much to unpack OMG. every time smt fluffy or cute would happen I would get GUT WRENCHING anxiety bc I just fricken knew that it wouldn’t last 😭😩

I totally thought that’s y/n’s mom would be himari so tbh I’m relieved that it was the mom because I was like these nosy ass parents DO NOT need more gossip fuel.

But omg I felt so bad for y/n when she had to momentarily relive her childhood trauma omg 😔 I’m acc DYING to know how satoru is gonna react, because he knows about y/n and her mom not really getting along. I REALLYYYY hope he keeps up his good streak and defends her from this crazy lady dude.

Anyhow I have a question regarding timeline. When himari called her dad and said “daddy I need help” is that when her parents called up y/n’s mom and made the contract with her originally? Or was himari calling her dad completely unrelated.

It would also make sense if himari’s parents had already talked to y/n’s mom and established that contract and she’s become their lackey of sorts. So when himari called her dad, he kinda just told y/n’s mom what to do yk?

I guess what I’m asking is did y/n’s mom establish the contract with himari’s parents on January 3rd lmao.

Also this all makes me think about what the terms of the contract might be. As much as I want to know I feel like knowing the terms of the contract and knowing that her mom would do smt so cynical would really hurt y/n. Or maybe y/n is emotionally checked out (for the most part) when it comes to her mom.

Sorry long ask 😅

MUAH 💋 I love u my queen

(Ignore this if it makes no sense I’m lowkey half asleep rn)

the anxiety is expected at this point 😭😭 but so yes. considering himaris parents basically did their own digging on y/n and koji, they practically know everything they need to know.

so when himari called her dad and explained the situation, he sent the mom in. the terms of the contract were kind of already established when she signed it. not to mention how they gave her a sign on bonus, with that she dyed her hair black because she mentioned how she needed to do that again since she was getting grays lol

i hope this helped ;)

[ss-shitstorm]

Okay okay I’m currently rereading fortuna primaginia for like the seventh or eighth time rn and I am genuinely very curious (and you by no means have to answer this if you don’t want to) but how would the story have differed if Ratchet had shot his shot first and reader had ended up with him before Optimus? My mind is just rolling at the parallels of what could be similar but what would be so very different. Would Optimus have even attempted engaging the reader after that? I love them so much!!!

(Anon sorry I'm sure you just wanted a simple little aside but you're getting a full blown greentext headcanon sloppy style fanfic)

Slaps ask This bad boy can fit SO MUCH angst in it good fucking god. This has been literally eating at my brain every waking second since I received it. There’s just so, so many ways this could go down. And since there IS so many ways this could go down, please by no means treat this shit my brain coughed out as the only way. It’s just a way. But it got my in a vice grip and won’t let go.

Also if anyone’s got their own ideas about how this could’ve gone down please, please share

-Around the time you guys had your first little late night/early movie pow wow, Ratchet, in a wired/half asleep delirium, makes a pass. -It’s a throwaway pass, probably relevant to something in the movie. He doesn’t expect you to even respond. -He definitely doesn’t expect you to reciprocate. -He knows he should stop right exactly here and never bring it up again

-But he doesn’t. -He’s old. He’s tired. He’s (at least a little) drunk. He’s been fighting for so long and passed up so many chances at happiness. Fuck it. He’s gonna see where this goes. -He starts making excuses to see you more often, and you do the same with him.

-OP notices this and immediately backs off, full stop. -You figure he wasn’t actually that into you to begin with, and (albeit reluctantly) shrug it off, and are thus freed to peruse Ratchet with no remorse. -In reality, it’s a knee-jerk reaction out of respect to Ratchet, since he’d done the same for him when they were dating, and he’d first started talking to Elita. Ratchet already sacrificed his happiness for him once before. he’s not going to let him do it again. -But that doesn’t stop his feelings from doing…whatever it is they’re doing. -You still saved Bumblebee. You still adopted Bumblebee, so this mech can’t not see you. -Every time he takes you to the park, or the movies, or on a nature walk somewhere, and sees you playing with his sparkling he wants to shove his head into an industrial trash compressor -He’s happy for you. He’s happy for Ratchet. He’s forever indebted to you for saving Bumblebee and Primus-fragging-blessed why isn’t that enough? -That and he’s still actively mourning the loss of Elita, whom you share an almost identical EM signature with, so every time he’s within sensing range of you he’s blasted with grief and guilt. -But he still spends time with you. It hurts just to look at you, but if the alternative is not seeing you at all then he’ll gladly endure the pain.

-When the heat cycle hits, you’re actually with Optimus. He, you and Bumblebee were in one of the training rooms getting some (gentle, for Bee’s sake) exercise. -When that electrical, wet, cracked egg sensation first drips down your spine, Optimus stops what he’s doing, stares at you, and starts trembling. -You’re understandably worried and ask him what’s wrong. -He manages to articulate something about you emitting an abnormal EM frequency, and to please to go see Ratchet about it immediately. -You have more questions, but he excuses himself from the conversation to walk a safe distance away from you Bee, and proceeds to tear a fucking wall out -You go to the infirmary to see Ratchet, who explains heat cycles and why he thinks your mutant little human body is mimicking one while crushing the edge of a medical berth with his servos. -You, already pretty riled up from watching two (2) of your handsome robot buddies crush and smash things on your behalf, tell him to go ahead and break the Hynek’s scale with you -Ratchet,having zero reason to restrain himself otherwise, mass converts, bends you over a human-sized medical gurney, and fucks you until you black out.

-You don’t go into a coma. Ratchet’s exceptionally skilled in maneuvering his field, so freeing it from your grabby, inexperienced one isn’t a problem for him. -Nor do you wind up with a busted pelvis, bruises or bleeding after sex(at least, not by much. His dick’s still the size of two tallboy monster cans duct-taped together.) -But after the third or so time you guys bone, you do start coughing a lot. And passing out a lot. And puking a lot. -Ratchet’s starting to worry he missed something in his evaluation of your body’s adaption to energeon and cybertronian bio fluids. So he runs some scans. -Lolnope. Turns out you adapted too well. You’re fucking pregnant. -He stares at the results for a whole-ass hour before he can even summon the courage to explain this to you. -By “explain” he means “I had no idea this was possible and I still don’t know how it’s possible or what the fuck it’s going to do to your tiny little squishy body if you decide to keep it.” -You, knowing full well how devastatingly close their whole species is to extinction, thinking about Bumblebee growing up without ever seeing another sparkling, decide “fuck it. We doing spacemom 2 : electric boogaloo”

-Ratchet’s whole ass world changes right exactly then. -In a bad way. -He’s going to be supportive. He’s going to take care of you. He’s going to monitor you night and day and give you everything you could possibly ever need, because not only is this entirely his fault and he cares about you, but- -He doesn’t want to be around sparklings. -Bumblebee is different. Bumblebee doesn’t exist because of him -But because of what happened with Soundwave, and the cassettes, he does not want to have a sparkling. He’s not allowed to. Not after what he did. -He starts drinking more. And loosing himself in his work. And finding reasons to not be around you. -Or anyone. -He’s in his lab constantly. He says it’s because he’s learning as much as he possibly can about human bodies and human reproduction and running what tests he can to find out how to give you the nutrients the sparkling needs without poisoning you, how to compensate for the effects of your weaker field on it’s organ and internal systems development. -He’s not lying. But he’s also using it as an excuse to stay the hell away from you. -Your relationship starts deteriorating, along with your health. -Seeing you getting sicker and weaker because of something he did to you is dredging all his baggage with the Iaconian hospital experiments up from the dark corners of his mind and you are in no condition for him to confess about that now. -So he hides. You’re left out in the cold.

-Optimus see’s you emotionally freezing to death, and offers warmth. -The time you’d normally reserved for spending with Ratchet is now spent with him. -You don’t want to dump your problems on him. You don’t. -But Optimus feels the sting of Ratchet’s cold shoulder just as badly as you do. So he winds up being less an emotional dumping ground and more of a commiserating partner. -You’re both so worried about him. -Op’s so worried about you, being balls deep in your carrying cycle, puking blood almost daily and in a terrible place with your baby daddy. -He tells himself it doesn’t go deeper than that. And it never will -He knows it’s bullshit. -He knows his spark screaming out for him to comfort you and screaming out for him to take you are two vines in the same jungle, hopelessly braided together and impossible to separate fully. -He knows this and he still invites you out to stargaze after Bee’s been put to sleep, wrapping you up in so many sweaters and blankets and bringing you to the top of the base for the clearest view of the desert sky. -He’ll lie down on his back and you’ll sit next to his helm and nerd out until you inevitably fall asleep mid-sentence somewhere. -He’s heard you name every single star in every single visible constellation a hundred times, and he’ll gladly hear it a hundred more. -He offhandedly compares you to Ursa while you’re pointing it out, and you break down in tears. -You’re not a bear. You’ve never been a bear. Bears are strong enough to keep their shit together. You’re not keeping your shit together. At all. -He tells you that’s bullshit. He tells you anyone in your position would be breaking down, yes including a bear. -He tells you you’re the strongest person he’s ever met and whatever’s going on with Ratchet’s not your fault. It’s not. -He has a point, but you still feel so weak, and tell him you can see why Ratchet wouldn’t want to be with someone as fragile as you. -Seeing you like this breaks something in him. There’s protocols blowing up left and right in his processor and spark telling him to stop the tiny human from crying. Stop the adoptive mother of his sparkling from crying. Stop you from crying. -So he rolls over, he cradles you against his cheek while you sob. You lean into him, throw your tiny arms around him and - -He kisses you -He realizes it’s a mistake the second he does it. He breaks the kiss, wracked with guilt, apologies immediately, tires to pull away- -You don’t let him. You kiss him back. -His field rolls over you out of nowhere like a tsunami, knocking you on your ass. -He can feel your field already sinking it’s inexperienced kitten claws into his, and he yanks it away before they can entwine further. -You two stare at each other in silence for a few moments after that, before wordlessly heading back inside. -You go straight to bed, too tired to analyze exactly what the fuck that was, or wonder if you were wrong about him not liking you. -He goes back to his room and stares at the wall. He has no excuse for what the fuck he just did. He doesn’t even drink. He made that mistake stone cold sober. -Both you and Ratchet need his support right now, not whatever shit he just pulled. -He’s a leader and a father. He can’t ever afford to make a mistake like that again. -But he can’t leave you alone, because he knows Ratchet won’t be here for you. -And he can’t leave Ratchet alone, because he won’t let anyone else near him. -He stares at the wall for the rest of the night.

-The next day, the sparkling sends out it’s first ping, seeking to start it’s nonverbal, psychic bond with it’s sire -Except, it doesn’t send it to it’s sire. -Ratchet’s field had been clamped so tightly around his frame ever since this started you haven’t been able to feel it at all. Naturally, the sparkling had nothing to cling to either. -Instead, it forms a bond with the mech who’s field dragged you in like a riptide -It forms one with Optimus -Neither of you bring this up to Ratchet. You can’t. You both already feel guilty as hell for whatever the fuck that was. -But neither of you can deny the gravitational pull you feel towards each other anymore. -The sparkling starts sending him clips of your voice. Of His voice. -Optimus feels his spark splitting in two both because this tiny little ethereal voice is calling out to him, not Ratchet, and because he can’t answer that tiny voice. -You make tentative plans to put your head through a fucking cheese grater the second this metal baby is out of you.

-Fortunately, that comes sooner than later. -Unfortunately, much like with Bee, the sparkling’s field gets lodged in your brainwaves during emergence, and can’t fully separate -They do finally become untangled once she’s born -But that’s only after your neural activity slows to a crawl when you blackout -NOW it’s coma time, baby.

-Seeing you comotose after giving birth to his sparkling is the last straw for Ratchet -He snaps -Hands the sparkling to Optimus, apologizes, and just leaves. -Optimus is left largely alone and flailing with this sparkling, who is basically recognizing him as her dad. -She repeatedly sends him clips of your voice, her way of asking “Where’s mom? I want mom? I waited so long to see them where’s mom?” -The first thing she blurts out with her primitive vox are the beginning notes to David Bowie’s Diamond Dogs. -Echo seems like a fitting name. He relays this experience and the suggestion to Ratchet. -Ratchet’s optics glaze over. His lip trembles. He unintentionally crushes the cube of hi-grade he’s holding, but agrees. -But beyond that, Ratchet is gone. -Wakes up, attends to any medical issues for the team, then drinks himself to unconsciousness, rinse and repeat. -He is a miserable, drunk old bastard barely fit for duty let alone to be a father -Thank god for Fowler, who’s kept people like Astoria, Carly and Raoul on call for exactly this outcome(He predicted robot fucking would have repercussions, and he was RIGHT) -Astoria takes one look at your comatose body and gets her tubes tied immediately. -They wind up having to take babysitting off base most of the time, though, because Ratchet refuses to be around any humans -Which is why when Jack, Miko and Raf wind up there eventually, he’s less than enthused. -They should leave. They NEED to leave, because he’s only ever hurt things smaller than himself. -Despite this, Raf and Bumblebee manage to still get through to him somehow. -His relationship with Echo, though. -It’s bad. -He can’t even look at her without seeing your face. And Soundwave’s face. And every single cassette he forced into existence.

-Optimus visits you while you slumber. -It’s not often that he can do this, pressure of being a leader. And a father. And now the lone diplomatic relation between cybertronians and humanity, after you decided to take a preemptive dirt nap. -Sometimes he tells you mundane things, like how his day went, how everyone’s doing -He likes to tell you how Bee and Echo are doing. That they’ve gotten along exceedingly well. Their so close in age, that’s to be expected. -But Bee adores her, and she’s aggressively possessive of him -And, when he’s run out of things to say, he’ll thank you. He’ll thank you for saving Bumblebee. For fighting so hard to establish refuge for his people here. For keeping him company. For being his friend. -For letting him love you. -He always chokes up on the last one, and leaves before he can finish, excusing himself from a quiet room and leaving as silently as he came.

-Ratchet visits you too. -A lot -In fact, when he’s not in the infirmary, or his quarters, or drinking in either of those places, he’s here. -But unlike Optimus, he comes up empty for words. -He just watches your unmoving body, and the gentle oscillations of the various monitors hooked up to you -He will say one thing, though, every time. Right before he leaves -It’s always the same thing. -”I’m sorry.”

-While this is going on, you’re busy cavorting around with Elita in the realm of the primes with Rumble and Frenzy -She (lovingly) berates you for not sleeping with her husband, which is a trip in of itself. -In between trials she teaches you how to hop in and out of dreams -Even the nightmarish, extremely unstable ones -So naturally, you dive right into one of Ratchet’s dreams -You’re flooded with every single last thing haunting his mind. -All of it. His history with the medical research. Everything he’s done. -It’s so horrific you can hardly stay for longer than a heartbeat, but- -You fight through the darkness to get to him, unrelenting until you grab his servo -And when you do so, you get to see him. Actual him. The him buried beneath the toxic walls he’s built up. -And that him bleeds nothing but the purest, unconditional love for you. For your sparkling. For Optimus and Bee. -He’s still there. The mech you fell in love with is still there. -He’s just drowning in his own regret and misery with no way out -His anguish is an uncharted mountain and he needs a guide -You’re going to have to be that guide -So with some intense astral fuckery, you drag him him out of his own dream, and Elita drags the both of you into Optimus’s dream.

-Optimus’s dream is more stable. -Thank god it can withstand the emotional shitshow that is the four of you being in the same place -There’s enough angst and self-blame to flood god’s basement -Elita, being dead and all, has even less tolerance for this bullshit then the three living of you combined -She grabs you with one arm and kisses you, and uses the other arm to push Ratchet into Optimus’s lap. -It devolves into a fourway pretty fast -You’re the luckiest human in the fucking universe -Afterwards, Optimus laments how guilty he feels for wanting this. For enjoying this. How bad he feels about wanting you. How much he still wants Ratchet. -He feels like a selfish asshole for pining after you both. You two should be happy together. Why can’t he just be happy for you two while silently drowning in his grief for Elita -Both you, Ratchet and Elita tell him that’s bullshit. -Both you, Ratchet and Elita tell him all of them deserve to be happy. -Elita tells all of you in no uncertain terms if you three don’t find a way to be a thruple IRL she’ll put each and every one of you in a sex coma IRL so help her Primus.

-You wake up. -It’s been 30. Fucking. years. -The first thing you see upon waking up is the last thing you saw before blacking out -Your little girl -She’s taller than a two story townhouse and her optics are the same color as your eyes. -”Welcome back, Mom.” -You can’t even begin to comprehend what you’re seeing -You don’t have time. The next person in the room is Bee, who’s even taller. -He knees down, trembling, warbling, tears in his optics. -”Did you have a nice nap?” -Reader.exe has stopped working -The next person in -Oh -Oh. -It’s Ratchet -Bee and Echo clear out before you can scream at them not to leave, leaving you alone with your estranged boyfriend

-He walks over to you slowly, mouth set in a firm, flat line. -He kneels down beside you, places his hand on the side of the berth -And starts openly weeping. -He’s sorry. He’s sorry for putting you in danger. He’s sorry for knocking you up. he’s sorry for icing you out. He’s sorry for fucking everything and tells you if you had even a shred of self-preservation instinct left in you you’d leave him and never look back and he’d never blame you and- -And you tell him to shut the fuck up. -You kiss him. He smells like highgrade and millennia of repressed guilt and you can’t get enough of it because it’s fucking Ratchet.

-You tell him about the coma. You tell him about all the dreams. You prove it to him by relaying everything about the cassettes. -His face pales further. You decide to (temporarily) withhold information about the dream orgy -You reassure him that where you were and how you got there, you could see shit. You could see the driving force and divine interplay of how bad decisions and poor judgment come to tangle hopelessly together and prompt action like puppeteers through the strings of the livings and you’re absolutely not done which this, but -You still love him. Nothing is ever going to change that. -Dude looks like he was fucking reborn. There’s something so young in those teal searchlights that make you feel like a child again. -For a moment, everything is okay. -He spends the rest of the night with you, never once leaving your side.

-You don’t get a happily ever after yet, though. -You still have two grown-ass children you need to catch up with -One of which doesn’t know you at all. -She’s extremely eager to start a relationship with you though because she’s been looking forward to this her entire life -She might be an adult, but the way she turns her optics on you and listens with rapt attention when literally anything comes out of your mouth makes you feel like you actually got your baby back -She’s utterly fascinated by you and worships the ground you walk on, treating you like some sort of beloved idol or storybook character come to life -It’s cute for now and probably not the healthiest reaction but that is by no means your biggest concern, because -Echo and Ratchet’s relationship is terrible -You can’t even call it a relationship -She’s got daddy issues out the aft -Blames him for everything that happened to you, which he happily reinforced with his self-depreciating lifestyle -Bee also low-key blames Ratchet for taking his mom away. He understand it’s not his fault, it was an accident, but you were gone for 30 years. -Echo is absurdly attached to the gaggle of humans that raised them, even more so than Bee. -She’s even more attached to Optimus, follows him around like a lost puppy and craves his approval -Which isn’t that hard to earn because he adores her. -He struggles with her grudge against her biological sire, though. Because no matter what he’s never found it in himself to blame Ratchet, and has tried, to little avail, to turn her towards him. -She’s shown considerable proficiency in medicine, but refuses to study it seriously because it’s what “that guy” does and FUCK “That guy”. -You know it’s not entirely your responsibility to fix her and Bee’s opinion of Ratchet -But it’s an enormous fucking mess and the burden’s going to be way easier if shared

-You go to Optimus for help -Because, aside from the humans, he’s the one who basically raised these two. -Alone -That cannot have possibly been easy -That cannot have possibly left him without some damage -He’s been kind, but distant ever since you awakened -Seems to be reluctant to speak to you alone -But once you have him alone, he breaks down -Sweeps you up in his hands -begs you to just let him hold you -He missed you. He missed you so fucking bad -He never told Ratchet about the time you two merged. Or the bond he formed with Echo because of it -Or the kiss -The guilt that comes over his face when bringing this up breaks your heart -You can’t take it anymore

-You go to Ratchet -You tell him about the dream in blinding detail -He looks like he’s watching a slow motion train crash when you bring it up, but he remembers every last vivid bit as though it were yesterday -Admits it was the happiest he’d ever been and waking up felt like getting kicked out of heaven -Admits he never actually wanted to break up with Optimus -Admits those feelings resurfaced when you were sick and Optimus was the only one he’d let anywhere near him -Admits that made him feel even worse because you were fucking dying -Probes you for your feelings for Optimus -This time you break -Fall to your knees and start fucking sobbing -You’ve loved this mech ever since you first laid eyes on him -Ever since fate determined you’d bring that tiny yellow sparkling from the brink of death -Being apart from him makes you feel like a plant without water. You’re shriveling up and drying out. -You need him. You don’t want to be apart anymore. -You tell Ratchet about the merge. The bond. The kiss. -Ratchet looks about as relived as he does devastated -Relived, because you want Optimus as badly as he still does -Devastated because he made himself physically unavailable for Echo to form that bond -He knows forming that bond with Optimus was probably the best thing that could have possibly happened to her at the time -But he also knows it happened because he fucked up and continued to fuck up for thirty whole ass years and his daughter wants nothing to do with him and it’s completely his fault -You tell him as kindly as possible, that yeah, he’s right, but also to shut the fuck up. -If she knew what he’d been through, she’d understand. -It’s gonna take a long time and a whole lot of work, but it’s not too late to fix this. -It’s also not too late to fix things with Optimus, and that probably won’t take as much work

-Since that’s the easier of the two tasks by far, that’s the one you guys start with -Both you and Ratchet corner him in the infirmary after he comes back from a mission a little banged up -Tell him in plain fucking english you both remember the dream, both want him romantically and carnally, both willing to move mountains to make this work, and if you don’t want Elita to make good on her threat you’d better sort this shit out now -Optimus doesn’t need any further convincing -Fucks you both till you see Primus and pass out.

-Now that you’ve made headway on sorting your relationship shit out, -It’s time to start sorting the parenting shit out -With the three of you working together, it’s a lot less overwhelming -Bee, emotionally mature as he is, winds up working through his grievances with Ratchet pretty easily -He never wanted to hold a grudge against him to begin with, and was pretty eager to drop it when given sufficient reason -That, and the fact that his dad, (who he’d been goading to confess to for years) has finally hooked up with his mom makes him pretty happy. -Echo is far less easy to appease -For a while, it actually gets worse, since she’s jealous of the time you and Optimus spend with Ratchet -But because of the time you’re spending together, it makes it harder for her to avoid him

-She asks you one day “what the frag you could possibly see in him” while she’s simultaneously re-calibrating the ground bridge resonance controls and running an experimental distillation on synthetic red energon -Staring stupidly with your mouth open at the similarities, you tell her -”Right now, I see you. Goddamn you’re just like him.” -She snaps her wrench in half, growls and kicks the shards across the room. -“Like him? I can’t fraggin’ stand him!” -You sigh. “He can’t stand himself either.” -She makes a face like she knows you have a point but isn’t willing to admit it even to herself, and that’s the exact same face Ratchet made when you told him you wanted to keep her.

-She finally approaches Ratchet the next day -Just walks up to him while he’s in the lab, drags a stool over and sits down -”So apparently we both hate ourselves” -Ratchet stops what he’s doing. -“What could you possibly hate yourself for?” -”Besides the obvious?” “-What obvious-?” “I’m the reason mom was in a coma.” -Ratchet drops his wrench. And his jaw -Tries to tell her that’s bullshit. -She won’t let him get a word in edgewise -”And I know you hate yourself for that too.” -He doesn’t even try to deny that one -”Hating you for the same reason I hate myself makes it easier to hate myself. And I…don’t want to hate myself anymore.” -Ratchet.exe has stopped working -She tells him she has absolutely not forgiven him for being practically non-existent in her life, and she’s not sure if she ever will but- -Maybe she doesn’t have to, to move on. -Maybe they can acknowledge this as a massive-ass problem that will keep coming back and never fully be resolved -And maybe they can move forward despite it -And despite both of them trying exceedingly hard not to be, they’ve wound up extremely similar, so -Maybe learning not to hate themselves will be easier if they do it together. -She tells him in spite of everything she still wants to like him. So bad. -Ratchet finally stops, and turns to look at her. -She’s gritting her denta, digging her digits into the side of the seat so hard it cracks, and holding back tears. -He tells her, after several tries to get his mouth working again, that he wants to give her a reason to like him. -”Yeah well-” she shakily pries her servos off the seat, jumps down, picks up his wrench and hands it back to him. “I guess we have the rest of our lives to figure that out.” -Her hands brush his as she hands the wrench back, and for the first time, she doesn’t recoil or jerk them away. -She leaves -He stands there for a whole thirty seconds after she leaves staring at the wrench before setting it down on the desk -Then putting his helm down on the desk -And starts crying harder in relief then he’s ever cried in his life

[daisyvisions]

Hiii!

This is my first but I’ve been a fan for a while. It’s so hard to find good tbz smut and I love yours so much. Especially cause you give my bias (Cobie) some love. Most other tbz writers I’ve seen only focuses on the more popular members.

If it’s not too much to ask, can you write something about how Jacob is so sweet with you but once you’re a brat towards him in front of the other members he punishes you about it later?

Sorry if that doesn’t make any sense. I’m like half asleep and deep in my Jacob brain rot rn.

I also ask if you have an anon list. If so, if 💕 is available, I’d love to claim it.

Thank you! I hope your pillow is always cold (or warm if you prefer that) and that you have a lovely day 💕💕

🥺 please you're too kind thank you for the support! I try my best to write better so your love helps a lot 💖 and of course! I'll link this ask to that writing if you dont mind hehe and yes you may take that emoji! hehe welcome to my lil garden of anons 🌼

and I hope you have a good day too and have a good sleep 🥰

[mx-legend-of-faye]

Opinion time guys. Some of you know I write on ao3 and am currently writing a fic, Numinous. As I work on Numinous and bring it closer and closer to completion, I’m wondering what you think my next work should be.

I have plans on Numinous being part of a series, there is going to be at least a part two, Deicide, but I also have ideas for other fics, so once Numinous is completed…

Yeah this is mostly for any of my readers on ao3 who also are following along on my tumblr. And guys I am not an expert writer or anything, I write for my enjoyment because I have an idea that I want to see written, but I also love it when other people enjoy what I’ve written.

Anyone who doesn’t already know my ao3 account/read my fic(s) but who wants to, here’s a link to my ao3:

So uhm yeah, I make no promises on what you’ll think of the quality of my work or the content, but over 100 people like Numinous so that’s gotta count for something lol and if you do decide to go check out my ao3 I hope you like my fic

I’m going to shut up now, sorry if literally none of this made sense, I’m like, half asleep rn

[dear-future-lovers]

NEW PINNED!

gay* 21 transmasc sub/bottom he/him (being a switch would be cool but alas i have so many anxiety disorders i just Need someone to tell me what to do)

*in the way the rainbow flag is gay :) i’m mostly mlm but sometimes im not immune to women

testosterone- feb 18th 2021

top surgery- nov 10th 2022

I’m kind of a late bloomer (literally started masturbating at 18) so i’m using this to explore a lot so anything here could be subject to change esp if i tried it out irl lmao. i also don’t get chemicals from orgasms yet so sorry if i complain about it ive been trying so many meds to fix that rip

⬇️ more specifics under the cut ⬇️

terminology- i don’t really like the word vagina (definitely something to unpack there but this isn’t the time or place for it) but otherwise im pretty lax with words tbh. i prefer tdick/dick/etc as opposed to clit but as far as the front hole goes i’m pretty chill. like pussy is fine as long as we both are in understanding that said pussy is connected to a guy. i like the word cunt idk why, boy as a prefix is also fine but i’m good either way! ex. boycunt and cunt are both fine by me.

kinks-

praise, bondage, clothes/being dressed up, cnc (emphasis on the consensual and nothing w the r word it’s a very specific flavor of cnc), praise, a bit of somno but only if i’m half asleep cause i still want to Be There lmao, manhandling, overstim, intox (weed), i really like plugs in like a stim way idk if that’s weird, gags seem really fun, free use, there’s probably more but those are the main ones i seek out content for on here. i also don’t know how many of those id like irl since ive never tried but all of those sound appealing as of rn

limits-

gagging/choking (i have emetophobia), scat, watersports, degradation (it’s okay if it’s like presented as a good thing like awww you’re so dumb condescendingly but if you’re being straight up mean it just makes me sad rip if that makes any sense), unsanitary, feet (i have like the opposite of a foot fetish lmao i’m foot averse) , misgendering/detrans, gore,

anything not listed i’m neutral about (unless forgot to list it) and am probably willing to explore it since again i was a bit late to the chase lmao

i don’t tag anything since i don’t expect followers but if anyone needs anything tagged pls let me know and i’ll try my best to remember :) rn i only really tag stuff about clothes so i can come back to it later since it seems kinda niche

i follow from juice but i have my age listed on both so 👍

(last updated june 4th 2024 for age)

[sniff-sniff-sniff]

opinions on wincest

eh. not really my thing tbh. but i don’t mind people who ship it or whatever like i’m not gonna send death threats to them like some freaky weirdo lol. i honestly think it doesn’t really matter that much what you do with FICTIONAL characters. cuz like- it’s not real. it doesn’t matter cuz they are NOT real. if you support stuff like that irl tho then you seriously need help.

i honestly just think if someone doesn’t like what somebody else ships they should just- shutup abt it ig? cuz at the end of the day, you don’t know these people and if you don’t like them you can just NOT interact with them. there’s no reason to be so coocoo bananas abt it lol.

idk if this makes sense- i took some melatonin and i’m half asleep rn so sorry if it doesn’t :/

have a nice night :)

[parkitaco]

rereading rwrb rn and so been thinking about them in the wedding alex and henry style

“Am I offending you?” Steve asked, the two flutes of champagne and half glass of wine slurring the edges of his words just a little, not enough to be noticed by the human ear probably, but by the way Jonathan’s eyes flocked at the half empty glass Steve was holding and how his brow twitched into a slight arc, Jonathan, of all people, had in fact noticed. Of course he had. Jonathan Byers with his perfect sandy hair and cool eyes was anything but human. A fucking robot, that’s what he was. “Sorry that I’m not obsessed with you like everyone else,” he continued on. “That must be confusing for you.”

Steve watched, expecting anything close to a snarl, a pull at the corner of Jonathan’s mouth maybe or a shift in his eyes, anything that would make him resemble a little less to a machine. But the reaction didn’t come. Jonathan’s posture was pristine and trained, his shoulders set and his expression perfectly blank. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was Jonathan’s presence alone that always managed to push the wrong buttons, but it drove Steve right up a wall, that fake serenity as if Jonathan truly believed he was above everyone else to let anything slip from his grasp.

“Do you know what?” Another thing that drove Steve madly up the wall: Prince Jonathan’s posh accent. Just the way he over-pronounced everything. Ugh. He had to fight back the urge bubbling in his chest to reach and do anything to shut up him. “I think you are as obsessed with me.” Jonathan’s eyes flickered up to Steve’s, cold and piercing. “I would even dare to say more.”

Steve’s mouth dropped open and the heat of the alcohol raised to his face. There was a smugness to Jonathan’s perfectly chiselled features, one that wasn’t revealed in a grin or a wink. It was simply there, a glow of sorts glassing his eyes and shining on his cheeks.

“Only a thought.” Jonathan shrugged a shoulder, but even then the movement looked fake and overly practiced. It wasn’t the real thing. Jonathan had never shown Steve the real Jonathan, and wasn’t that maddening? “Have you noticed,” he keeps going, polite as ever, “not once it has been me the one to approach you, or how I have been exhaustively civil every time we spoke and crossed paths? Yet here you are again, seeking me out again.” Jonathan brings his own flute to his lips and takes a sip. “Simply an observation.”

“What? I’m not—” Steve stammers. “You’re the—“

“Have a lovely evening, Steve,” Jonathan said tersely and spins on his shoes—royals don’t turn, they fucking spin—to walk off.

(it’s past three am here and i’m falling asleep typing this so sorry if some of it doesn’t make sense)

SFDJLAKJK

[whimsyprinx]

i wonder if I’ll ever be able to stop my performative positivity bs

[maximwtf]

“Finish what I started.”

                                       Mycroft x reader

words: 2048

google docs pages: 3

warnings: description of torture and death, trauma response, ptsd, nightmare, comfort

opening: You come back from a mission that was in another country. Something seems to have happened, since Mycroft notices you waking up to repetitive nightmares and acting odd. 

AN// obsessed with him rn– reader can be any gender. Also I’m sorry if he’s ooc, It’s 2am and I wrote this while half asleep :”D!

                       “Finish what I started.”

It had only been a couple of weeks since you came back from the latest mission you had been sent on. This one had lasted for almost three months, and it included you having to go undercover and take down a medium size crime web. Working in this field, you had seen and experienced a lot that a normal everyday person couldn’t even imagine. These experiences had frozen you to your core, making you come off as a cold and an emotionless person. So far only a couple people had you allowed into your life, seeing the person you used to be. One of them was your partner, nowadays husband, Mycroft. You bonded with him well because of his cold persona, but it didn’t take long for the both of you to find out the true personas behind the cold outer looks. Finding some solace within each other.

After the mission was over and you had been picked up, something in you had already changed. What had been done to you and what you had witnessed was way worse than anything else from any past missions. The group was violent to even it’s own members, making you a target to the tortures they held every now and then. They would leave you alone after the beatings, without any water or food. If it wasn’t you getting tortured, it was someone else. That didn’t mean you were safe though. They made you and the others watch, and many times the tortures ended up with someone dying. You could sense the paranoia in the air from their leader, not trusting his own troops.

You had killed a lot of people because of your work, but never had you tortured someone to their death. All the kills that had been completed by you were fast, not giving the target time to suffer before officially dying. You had a steady hand and a cool mind, making the fatal shots easy for you to make. But with the latest mission, you were not allowed to use a gun to end someone. None of the others did either. You could only torture them to their limits, and wait for their screams to die down, taking that as a sign that they had officially died. There had been many times you had been at your limit to blow the cover, but you weren’t the type to give up. Knowing that the mission was nearing its end, you just pushed through even if every day disgusted you.

After the plane had landed the first thing you saw was Mycroft’s car. It had been almost three months since the last time you had seen him or talked to him, and the stress from before just kept on building up.

Walking up to him felt strange, and you knew he must have picked up that something was wrong, but he just didn’t say anything. Considerate as always. He was clever, even if he didn’t use his skills the same way Sherlock used them. With a quick greeting, you stepped in his car, closing your eyes to calm down as soon as you sat down. For once it felt safe to just sit and be, because for the past three months doing something like this had been impossible.

The ride home was quiet, only the radio making noise as it played songs silently. Not even after getting home did you speak, deep in thought. The plane ride had been long, and it was quite late when you finally stepped foot inside the familiar apartment. Everything seemed to be in the same place as it had been when you left all those months ago, but somehow the house still felt strange. Mycroft stepped in the house as well, walking past you to the kitchen. Your gaze followed him, as if your mind was automatically waiting for something bad to happen. Feeling your body get ready to fight and to survive made you cringe. Why couldn’t your mind see where you were? This was your home, and especially with Mycroft here no danger could get to you. Anger filled your mind because of your behaviour, and while gritting your teeth you walked into the more familiar shared bedroom.

Emotions like these were something you usually kept to yourself, but right now your chest felt tight and crying for some reason felt like a good option. You knew what you were signing up for when you started to work as an agent, but not once did you consider what your limits were. Those limits had been crossed over so many times in the past couple of months, it was no wonder your mind couldn’t handle it. And the fear of this possibly ending your career shook your very core. You didn’t react to Mycroft walking into the room as well, it was only when he turned off the lights that your mind reacted to him being there. “You didn’t want to eat?” He asked as he walked to his side of the bed, past you. You shook your head and slipped out of some of your clothes, only leaving on a t-shirt and undergarments before getting under the covers. After a while the mattress moved as Mycroft laid down as well and found a comfortable position to sleep in. Due to the darkness of the room, you didn’t know if the older Holmes had fallen asleep or if he was awake as well, but you couldn’t fall asleep. 

Even though your mind knew you were safe here, your body was still ready to defend itself at any given moment. Suddenly a hand took a hold of yours, startling you. You stiffened up, almost getting up to slap the hand away, but before being able to do that you saw who it was. Mycroft’s eyes were on you, examining your reaction. “What happened?” His voice asked, a hint of concern apparent in his voice which he hid quite well. You laid back down carefully, letting the man’s hand rest on top of yours, knowing he has missed you even if he didn't say so. “Nothing, I’m just tired.” You explained, turning your back to him and trying to fall asleep. You could almost feel Mycroft’s eyes on you in the darkness until he closed his eyes.

You stayed awake for a while after that, making sure that the man was fully asleep before being comfortable enough to even try to sleep. After getting used to not being able to sleep before everyone else had been taken over by sleep, your body still couldn’t let go of the habit. Sleep was still something you knew you needed, and after trying and forcing sleep to take over you, it thankfully happened. You finally passed out, and drifted into a light sleep. You had never been a heavy sleeper, and even some of the slightest sounds were able to wake you up. Most of the time you’d just lay in bed awake and decide if the noise was worth getting up and checking where it came from, but after the mission it felt like you were even more sensitive to sounds during the night. Sleeping made you vulnerable and an easy target, due to not being able to check your surroundings. So during the mission sleeping was only possible in rare places where you felt safe enough.

Hours passed before your mind began to form a dream, a nightmare. You were right back at the gang’s base. An old lamp was hanging from the concrete ceiling, only lighting up a small section of the cold room. The members you had gotten used to seeing were there, watching you get beat up for making a mistake. They had tied your hands to a pair of ropes that were hanging from the ceiling, taking turns to keep hitting you. The world was spinning and the taste of blood was disgusting, making you keep your mouth open. You didn’t have the energy to keep your body up anymore, now leaning onto the ropes, hoping that they were strong enough to take your full weight. One of the members kicked your stomach, making your body swing back and forth on the ropes. The last hit was from a whip that came in contact with your back, making you let out a growl through your teeth. You didn’t want to give them the satisfaction of seeing you in pain, resisting was all you could do so they would give up. There was no energy left in you, but even without looking you could hear most of the men walk out of the room one by one, leaving you alone to hang there by your hands. Your breaths were turning into steam in the cold air as your head kept drooping.

You broke out of the nightmare, taking air in as fast as you could before sitting up on the bed. ‘Fuck….fuck..’ you kept whining quietly while leaning your palms against your face and bringing your knees closer to your body. Keeping on repeating the same word, you sat there, trying to remove the images from your mind. The sudden movements started to stir awake your husband from his sleep as well, first making him groan silently before opening his eyes. It was only then when you realised he had woken up that you went quiet, only leaning to your hands in the darkness of the room. “What- hey, what happened?” Mycroft’s sleepy voice asked as he slowly sat up as well, trying to shake off the sleep from his eyes. His movements frightened your already tense mind, making you automatically try to drag your body away from him, towards the edge of the bed. “Hold- hold still-” The man said, trying to calm down his voice after seeing the state you were in.

He got closer to you, bringing you into a tight embrace, not sure what else to do. You resisted for a moment, trying to get away from him by thrashing around. This didn’t last long though since you were already drained, and soon you gave up. “There…okay..” Mycroft mumbled while easing the embrace, feeling you lean against him. “What did they do to you?” He then asked, feeling his hand around your back, soon feeling the rashes from the whip through your shirt. “They used to have beatings.” Your voice shook the same way your body did, filled with fear and the need to let the tension go. You could feel how tense Mycroft was, clearly surprised by your reaction, knowing something bad must have happened to cause a reaction like this. “Why didn’t you inform us? We would have pulled you back immediately.” He raised his voice a little, not being able to help it. He was worried, a hint of anger in him sparking at the news being broken out to him. You hid your face away from him before speaking up again. “I didn’t want the mission to be left unfinished.” Mycroft sighed, understanding what you meant but still angered by the fact that you hadn’t called out for help when the beatings had started to happen. “We could have at least helped you.” He then replied, hand placed over the scar going across your back, tracing the top of it before stopping. “I can’t fucking sleep because of this.” You whined, finally turning your eyes to him. He didn’t say anything, but something about him told you that he understood and felt bad for what you were experiencing.

Mycroft nodded slowly. “I know, but we can see what we can do tomorrow. I’ll be there for you, but I need you to sleep.” He then said, looking directly at you. “I’ll try.” Was all you could say, feeling your chest tighten again. “Promise me?” He asked, slowly letting you go from the embrace. “You know I can’t do that.” You sighed, laying back down to take a breath. Mycroft followed your actions, bringing you closer to him. He rarely ever ‘cuddled’ with you, but over time you had noticed that he did it on his own when he noticed you weren’t doing well. You relaxed after a while, slowly starting to drift back to sleep, hoping the dreams wouldn’t haunt you anymore.

[aphroxditus]

ʜᴀɪᴋʏᴜᴜ ʙᴏʏs ʀᴇᴀᴄᴛɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀʏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴀᴋᴇ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ғᴜʟʟ ʟᴇɴɢᴛʜ ғɪʀsᴛ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ʀɪᴅɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇᴍ (ᴘᴀʀᴛ 2)

ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇs: ᴍɪʏᴀ ᴀᴛsᴜᴍᴜ | ᴍɪʏᴀ ᴏsᴀᴍᴜ | ᴋᴜʀᴏᴏ ᴛᴇᴛsᴜʀᴏ̄

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢs: ᴀ���sᴜᴍᴊ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ | ᴏsᴀᴍᴜ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ | ᴋᴜʀᴏᴏ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: ʟᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇ | sᴇxᴜᴀʟ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ: ʀɪᴅɪɴɢ, ᴅᴇɢʀᴀᴅᴀᴛɪ��ɴ, sᴘᴀɴᴋɪɴɢ, ᴘʀᴀɪsᴇ, ᴅᴀᴄʀʏᴘʜɪʟʟɪᴀ, ᴄʜᴏᴋɪɴɢ, ᴅᴀᴅᴅʏ ᴋɪɴᴋ, ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀ ᴋɪɴᴋ,

ᴍɪʏᴀ ᴀᴛsᴜᴍᴜ

Leaning back, Atsumu out his hands behind his head.

“I’m waiting sweetheart~”, he said in a sing song voice.

“Stop rushing me”, y/n whimpered as she tried taking in his length, already half way but struggling.

“You’re the one who had a big mouth earlier saying you could ride me without any help”, he chuckled.

“Shut up”, she murmured, continuing to sink in.

Wincing, y/n whimpered as she felt him deep inside her. Atsumu grunted as she clenched around him. He had a lazy smirk plastered on his face as he watched her struggle.

“I can make ya feel good darling. Just admit you need my help and your my dumb lil slut and I’ll make ya cum too”, he lowly chuckled.

“N-no”, she stuttered shaking her head violently. Sinking in fully, y/n grinned in triumph and scoffed at him. “Looks like I didn’t need your help- nghhh.”

Atsumu bucked his hips, making his tip hit her cervix.

“Don’t get cocky with me yet, bitch. You said you’d ride me without help, no?”

Nodding, y/n bounced up and down trying to adjust to his thick size but whimpered every time she came down. Tears pricked the corner of her eyes. Eyes welling up, y/n pouted looking at Atsumu.

“I- I need help please…”, she murmured under her breath.

Raising a brow, he laughed. “Oh? What’s was that? Speak up”, he mocked.

“Need. Help”, she said a bit louder, gritting her teeth.

“Atta girl”, he slapped her ass making her jerk forward.

She let out a sharp cry. Grabbing onto her hips, he rocked them back and forth at a fast pace, groaning loudly, throwing his head back. Clench8g around his length, y/n moaned softly, enjoying the immense pleasure of his cock.

“Mmm I love the way your pretty cunt wraps around me like that~”, he said in a low voice.

His cock began twitching inside her, indicating he would cum.

“Cum in me daddy”, she babbled, eyes rolling to the back of her head, simultaneously bouncing on his cock.

He eyes were breasts and squeezed them tightly, making y/n moan. The immense sense of euphoria and her eccentric feeling took over her as she rode him till both their high.

“Yeah, that’s a good girl. Ride my cock like that baby~”, he moaned, releasing his warm liquids into her as she milked his cock, clenching harshly.

Falling onto his chest, y/n whimpered as she came.

“D-daddy- ‘m sorry”, she mewled.

“My pathetic little slut, thinking she can do things without me”, he slapped her ass, making her yelp.

Atsumu knew he had her all wrapped around his finger. Smirking to himself, he stroked her hair, letting her fall asleep onto of him.

ᴍɪʏᴀ ᴏsᴀᴍᴜ

“Fuck~ Yer so tight rn- loosen up”, Osamu cursed, grunting.

Y/n was perched on his dick, half way through.

“I-I can’t, you’re so b-big Samu”, she whined, tears rolling down her cheek, the mascara staining it. A crooked smirk was planted onto his lips knowing it was a good idea to let y/n wear mascara this night. She’d been bragging that she could take in his length without any help and he got sick of it. Now, she was the one who was regretting this. Osamu refused to help her and instead watched her cry. Her pretty tears rolling down her cheek, falling down. All for him. All because of him.

“Samu- please help me”, she sobbed, slapping at his bare chest lightly.

“Oi, watch it”, he snarled. “You said you’d do it and I expect you to stick to your words.”

She sunk further, feeling him fill every inch of her up with his fat cock. He grunted. It truly was amusing to him to see her so vulnerable, so in need of his help. Such a dumb slut. He squeezed her plushes with his big hands and y/n moaned.

“Please~”, she whined, rolling her hips back and forth, making him grunt.

“Fine but you’re not allowed to cum for this behaviour”, he grumbled, gripping onto her hips, leading her down.

He bucked his hips up, making his cock slam into her and she moaned, clenching up.

“Nghhh daddy~”, she mewled, enjoying this pleasure of him digging deep inside her.

“That it baby. Take the whole cock in. You filthy slut. Saying you can do something then backing out”, he hissed.

Y/n didn’t care about his dirty talk. It turned her on more. It made her feel good. His slut. He was so big, he filled every inch of her insides. It was too much for y/n. He came inside y/n with a grunt, releasing his warm fluids into her.

“Daddy’s cumslut huh?”, he chuckled, shaking his head.

He grabbed her neck and pulled her down to his face. Y/n helped and placed her palms on his chest to keep balance.

“Atsumu can’t fuck ya this good ya know? So next time you wanna fuck my brother in the room next door, think about right now and how dumb ‘m gonna pound you. Pound that pussy-”

Whimpering, y/n nodded. “Yes. O-only yours-”

ᴋᴜʀᴏᴏ ᴛᴇᴛsᴜʀᴏ̄

Kuroo laid back and slipped off his boxers, already being hard for y/n. She stood over him with only her red laced bra, no panties to cover how wet she was. Getting on top, she took a deep breath. She didn’t know he’d be this big. Now she was regretting talking shit about how she can take him in and make his cum easily.

“Second thoughts, kitten?”, a crooked smile crept up the side of his mouth, staring into her eyes with half lidded eyes.

Pursing her lips, y/n decided to remain silent. Kuroo was enjoying seeing her struggle and she knew it. Y/n cleared her throat and lined herself up to let his cock slip into her. She winced as she tried to adjust on how big he was. She leaned for his hands to hold and grip but he pulled away and tutted.

“Ah ah ah, no help. Didn’t forget your promise did you?”

“K-Kuroo please- I need some help!”, she whined, pouting.

“That really is a shame isn’t it?”, he mocked her pout. “Come on, this cock won’t ride itself”, he jerked up, making her bite down on her lip in pain.

“Daddy, pleaseeee”, she whined, rolling her hips back and forth.

Tears pricked her eyes as she fell down further onto his cock and starting to ride it, back and forth. He made her feel so full. It was hard to do it without his help but she would make him beg for her. Claim victory in the end. She moaned as she placed her palms down onto his abs, feeling how rock hard they were.

“K-Kuroo”, she whimpered. “Please-”

“Who?”, he teased.

Hesitating, y/n pursed her lips before sighing. “M-master?”

“That’s my girl”, he cheered with a smug look on his face.

Bucking his hips up, he thrusted into her while y/n bounced. His hands reinforced her hips to keep her stable.

He began mocking her. “My little kitten really thought she could ride me without my help. Make me beg. How pathetic- fuck.”

Y/n jerked forward and he groaned from pleasure. An expression of triumphant rested on y/n’s face as she interrupted him.

“Sorry, say that again please master”, she said innocently, big eyes, putting her index finger on her bottom lip, tilting her read to the right.

“Fucking bitch”, he growled and gripped her tighter, making her grind against him slowly.

The sudden decrease in pace made y/n beg for it to go back up again. Y/n tried to rock back and forth but he kept her down, controlling her with his pace because fuck, she was his slut and he could do anything he pleases with her.