#I know where this kinda stuff leads and I don't wanna go there. I've seen it happen w my brother w my friends w my ex w old friends

[rantz-for-st0ry]

silly funny haha moment when I need to talk to my brother Abt smth srs cus I think I'm going down the same path he did when he was my age/a little younger but Im scared of him and him saying that I'm just copying his mental issues for attention

[artemisiavulgaris1114]

I normally don't do discourse but, I've seen some floating around and I maybe have some relevant perspectives so here's my opinion on a thing:

so I am a hella subtext girlie. ships are always painful as fuck for me (in the good way) because give me breadcrumbs and I'm HOOKED I wanna eat that whole loaf crumb by crumb!! no ez mode. that's boring. I love a nice slow burn, I'll happily gnaw my way through 50 chapters of complicated setup and character development before they even meet (and like lol maybe this is actually the problem). And I love Lucanis's romance and I'm happy with his story, the writing and the way it progressed for the most part. I'm demi so I got it and that's all I'm gonna say on that point til a bit further down.

I STILL think that the way it was handled doesn't work well with the pacing of the game, and I don't think that's down to the writing, I think it's mostly the way the game story progression was designed. I think this is true to some degree for all the romances because there's no interactivity outside of quest cutscenes and the ambient dialogue that happens right after the commitment scene. But especially for Lucanis because to me their romance is in the little details, the every day interactions as their relationship slowly deepens. That's obviously done really well in the cutscenes we get, but feels like it makes less sense in the scope of the whole story because there are a whole bunch of in-between pieces missing.

If you're going to finish everything there is to do by the end of the game, a huge chunk of the time that you spend doing quests is completely devoid of any reference to your romance. I feel like especially for Lucanis and Rook more ambient dialogue between them would have made it feel more natural and substantial, especially especially if they are both Crows. For example, the way it's handled between Taash and Harding/Lucanis and Neve feels much smoother and the development is more overt. I think being that those happen more toward the end of the game, there feels like more of a natural character development-relationship development progression as you go through their individual quests.

Like, 2-3 lines of additional unique dialogue peppered throughout the lead-up to endgame after the romance is locked in with Lucanis would have vastly improved it and helped bridge the gap, I feel. And I'm not necessarily talking about romantic interactions, just some unique dialogue to show how well they've come to know each other, how Rook understands his mind and that it helps them build trust, any sort of communication to illustrate the subtler ways they're building their bond. It's clear from Lucanis's journal that they're intended to be spending a decent chunk of their off-time together--so why is there little to no evidence of it in game other than the initial reference? There's no reactivity from Teia and Viago, which made me sad because theirs is the reaction I'd want to see the most. I've gotten lines from Neve and Taash about the romance after it's locked in, and the convo with Emmrich about gifts, but that's it as far as other companions go. Maybe there's stuff I'm missing? Maybe this is something lacking in all the romances.

And honestly as a demi person the final romance scene kinda came out of left field for me. considering it felt like not much communication had been happening leading up to it (minus the pre-endgame convo, which I'm also gonna mini-argue should be more explicit with the emotions involved from Rook's end, like the spanish translation) and understandably a lot has been going on. but I wasn't really expecting it to escalate the way it did with so little dialogue, I'm fine with it but this is one of those cases where I prefer less subtext and more text before something like that happens, actually.

I did a replay where I saved Lucanis's quests until last and that honestly felt a lot better, so maybe the pacing's just a me problem idk. I'm gonna chalk a lot of this stuff up to cut content? and maybe like, the fact that they didn't want to get too specific with Rook's ambient dialogue since they're meant to be player-driven. Going back to the companion romance comparison, it's a lot easier to write dialogue between two characters who are more specifically defined.

Anyway blah blah that's it. i'm nitpicking because overall I'm happy, so anything i feel doesn't work or is lacking is gonna be a gripe, and you can be happy and still have valid criticisms. I enjoyed the game and the writing and the characters quite a lot, and I honestly wasn't expecting to, so yay! Time to gnaw on that subtext and see what kinda creative juice comes out~

[icantthink-ofagoodname]

(i got the idea from @chainsawcadet !) (sorry if this sucks, it's short bc im kinda rushed rn)

You were preparing the library for the kids event that was about to start, minorly stressed because the person that was supposed to be reading to the kids had called out so you needed to find a replacement soon. Trying to reach one of the books on the top shelf you stood on your tippy toes but still couldn't reach.

“Want some help?” You turned around and saw the source of the voice, he was tall and muscular with black hair and a white streak in the front.

“Yes please,” You moved so he could grab the book.

The man grabbed the book down and handed it to you.

“Thank you,” You said “Hey I've seen you around here a good bit but I've never caught your name”

“It's Jason,” He responded.

Wait…

“Wait you're Jason Todd?” You asked, shocked that someone that famous was someone you saw regularly.

“Yeah, don't go around telling everyone though. I like my privacy.” Jason scratched the back of his head.

“Oh no I won't” You smiled, but then you had an idea “Hey we're getting ready for a free book reading for kids and the reader just called out, would you mind reading to them?”

Jason thought about it for a second.

“What does it entail?”

“You'd just have to read two to three short stories for some kids, show them the pictures and stuff” you responded

“You know what, sure” Jason agreed making you smile widely

“Great! Here, let's go to the kids section so you can pick out what you wanna read” You lead him to the kids section.

Looking over the books Jason spotted one and picked it up.

“I'm a lot like batman” He read the title out loud.

“That ones interesting, I don't see why you'd wanna be like batman” You said, cocking your head to the side.

This made Jason smile slightly as he put the book in the read pile.

After choosing two more books Jason made his way to the carpet area where he saw a bunch of kids sitting on the floor. Jason made his way to the front of the room and sat on the chair that was placed there.

It was a little awkward at first but after Jason got into it he was good, he played into the role well, he changed the pitch of his voice for the different characters and you could tell the children loved it.

After he finished all the books the kids thanked him and he smiled brightly.

"Wow they really loved you" you made your way over to Jason after the kids had left.

"Well when my little brother was tiny I used to read to him a lot, I've always loved reading." Jason told you "Oh yeah I never got your name."

You told him your name and he smiled.

"Well see you later" He slipped past you to leave

"Wait!" You stopped him

Jason turned to look at you and raised an eyebrow

"Can I get your number?" You asked, blushing at your boldness

Smiling, Jason grabbed a piece of paper and wrote down his number before handing it to you

"See ya around princess" And with that Jason left, leaving you to stand there in shock

[absolutelynotsanebaby]

Hi! Where could I read your villains.au as a story? Cause I've seen kinda comic style posts of yours but I don't know if it's actually a comic or if it's just more art? Overall I just wanna know more of the AU cause I really love your designs but I'm kinda confused on what happened to get there

currently it's just art and posts yeah 😔 I'd love to write it as a fic or comic or post more one-shot style comics of it but I'd have to beat the ADHD first and currently I am rawdogging life. I was going to work on a master-post but, again, the ADHD and then also I got SICK, so that may or may not actually get done. However I DID get a kinda plot summary written down so I'll share that ig.

Sorry for the Wall Of Text. This doesn't cover the pre-story backstories though, which, I feel are incredibly relevant! So let me explain some stuff. Zane: he was infected/partially possessed by the Overlord during Rebooted when he Exploded said Overlord. It laid dormant until post-Ice Emperor to which he ran away and that sealed his doom. At some point during his take over of the part of the land, he grabbed Pixal and never let her go either. Kai: this one's pretty simple, it's basically what if the staff in ToE actually just drove him evil and he never shook the influence. Cole/Lilou: bad ending of DOTD where he was completely forgotten and managed to keep Yang tied to the temple but in the process got himself trapped in it. This did not go well, clearly! Nya: well, Seabound happened first, so she combined with the sea but she did so much less ready than in canon, and significantly more grief-ridden and angry. So that affected what she was like as the ocean, and it eventually lead to her kind of ....for a lack of a better terms eating Nyad and becoming even stronger. She just continued to lose her humanity from there. Jay: so, well, his story started back in skybound where he ended up wishing to be a djnn instead of wishing no one had found the teapot. He stuck with the team still, and pretended to not regret that wish but he just got progressively more bitter and disillusions as time went on and after seabound he just quit. Up and left, leaving just Lloyd. He continued to get worse after that. Lloyd: he was 'okay' up until crystallized where he just kind of cracked from all the stress and loss. That cracking resulted in Harumi dying and that started his transformation and spiral.

(as for Wu, he just never got out of the time-stream.) Hopefully that helps explain somethings Akahslfaiogs? I'm going to link some other posts that explain other stuff too. Zane & his kingdom: x Jay & Harumi Ninja Pixane (<- NOTE: the kid thing isn't canon, but this post just explains their dynamic good) x (<- second post explaining similar) Kai's cult + kai-nya relationship

OKAY that's all for now I think! sorry i feel like trying to figure out this AU for anyone whos not me is like putting together a red string board but I try!

[bluelancelion]

So, I've been re-watching Stranger Things S1 - S4 and I got things to say just to let them out of my system.

First of all, kudos to the Duffer Brothers for one of the best found family ever created. I love the gang, I love the later addition of Max, Robin and Eddie. The characters are clean.

But here's the thing, let's talk about characters and, more specifically, Steve and Nancy.

So, we pretty much got a weird vibe between Nance and Steve in S4, kinda heavy hinting that Steve is totally not over Nance and they might get back together.

Now here's why this is a bad move.

First of all, I heard somewhere that Stranger Things is supposed to end like a circle, so many things that we've seen in S1 might return by the end of S5 (aka last season).

IF that's true, quoting some fans theories, then:

- Robin is gonna become Nancy's bestie (taking Barb's place)

- Steve and Nancy are gonna get back together (?)

Look.

I know what you're cooking here.

Steve and Nancy started their relationship when they both weren't fully evolved as characters, right? We're gonna pull a "right person, wrong moment" move in S1 that's gonna come back in s5 because after their MASSIVE character development, Steve and Nancy are basically two complete new people.

THAT could've worked IF Johnathan didn't exist.

Cause let's be real here, if Johnathan didn't exist, this trope would've been perfectly fit. BUT-

You guys gave us the whole "Nancy likes Steve but she's not in love with him" and then you pull out Johnny boy and pretend like we don't pick up the fact that Nancy loves him?

Plus, if Murray says so, then it's law.

I don't make the rules here! He's basically jesus, everything he says is right and if that man says Nancy and Johnathan love each other, then they love each other. If he says Hopper and Joyce love each other, then that's true, no questions asked.

"But people change, and Murray could always say that as things are now, Nancy and Steve are perfect for each other."

Yeah, maybe, but then what was the point of giving us such good chemistry between Johnathan and Nancy? They've hit it off since season 1, carrying it all on season 2, had a difficulty overcome TOGETHER in season 3, making their relationship even stronger if you ask me-

Only for it to... to what? In season 4? (I haven't rewatched season 4 yet so I don't remember the details except they wanna go to different colleges, but I'm dead sure they don't break up yet)

But noooo, the Duffer Brothers want to give us a lesson. Every person in our life is important to us and they shape the person we are today. Nancy needed a Johnathan in her life, in that specific moment of her life, not a Steve. But as we get closer to the future, or the present in s5, we might find out that the character that is Nancy Wheeler in that season, in that period of her life, doesn't need a Johnathan anymore, but a Steve.

And I don't say "need" as if boys can be swapped like socks, I mean that maybe Nancy is building her future somewhere where Johnathan doesn't want to be, or maybe Johnathan is growing into a man who's goals are far away from Nancy's.

And this is heartbreaking, cause you know these causes might lead to a break up and it had NOTHING to do with their feelings for each other. Nancy and Johnathan love each other, no matter if they break up or not because what they want in life is different.

Which brings us back to Steve getting back with Nancy.

Look, I'm all in for people finding happiness, but it feels a bit odd to give us such a good couple, make them break up (and thus breaking our hearts, but no matter what, we'll still love them both because life led them to break up, not their feelings)... Only for Nancy to be RANDOMLY back with Steve? Like???

I don't know, it gives me a bittersweet taste.

Now. Let's not forget this is Stranger Things, and stuff might go fucking south like:

- Johnathan dies and Nancy is left grieving. We have a timeskip into the future where Nance and Steve are together again, fighting the grief in the company of each other. Maybe in the past, Steve and Johnathan fought side by side in the Upside Down and it was Steve who failed to save Johnatan. In the meanwhile Steve and Nancy got closer as well, so it's easier to digest their reunion if it's under this perspective.

But seriously? Are we gonna pull that, Duffers?

OR Steve dies (please no) and Nancy's right there to hear his last wish and maybe she kisses him? Like a goodbye forever kiss, they might've worked out if it weren't for Jonathan and how things went in the end, yadda yadda

Honestly, I can think of a bunch of theories about how this could go, but no matter HOW it goes, I still think that making Steve not over Nancy is a tiny bit of an insult to his character development.

After Robin, his character was peak. He was supposed to get with her (which let's admit it, we all low-key rooted for it) but when Robin's actress proposed her idea of making Robin a lesbian, literally everything went from perfect to THE EPITOME OF PERFECTION. King (hair) Steve Harrington, popular once douchebag, now single mom besties with a lesbian? Peak writing. PEAK. WRITING.

You know what could've been even more peak? Making Steve come out as bi and have a little thing with Eddie but y'all were cowards

BACK TO MY POINT. Steve wishes for and deserves a soulmate, never ending love and a family. And, in a way, he has that already through the kids, through Robin, his friends-

I just... I don't think, and I neither see Nancy being that person for Steve. And it sucks cause they could've made a character specifically for Steve to fall in love with (I know, that was supposed to be Robin but since she's not anymore, either give Steve someone new cough Eddie would've been a good match cough OR give us a new female character so he can have his dream love story and we'd all be happy) instead of recycling old characters who had an awesome journey just to end where it all began.

And I get it, this is supposed to be Stranger Things ending, right? To finish where it all started.

And again, the Steve and Nancy of S5 might be exactly who they need in their lives at that moment.

But after EVERYTHING we've seen so far in these 4 season? Nah man. Just... It doesn't work.

I'd be happy to hear your thoughts :)

[buckys-black-dress]

heaven won't be the same

a/n: hello!!!!! i know it's been, like, a really really long time since i've written for you guys. depression + nursing school = even worse depression. anyways, here's something that i wrote to just kinda get me back into the groove of writing. enjoy!

wc: 5.7k words

warnings: NONE. she's chill today.

[ bucky barnes x nurse!fem!reader ]

-

Is this is the right place?

Looks like it. Just knock. What's the worst that could happen?

Your hand lifts, albeit hesitantly, and raps against the wooden door.

You wait a moment before you hear shuffling on the other side, and then the lock turning and the door opens.

The blond who opens it stares at you, searching for some sort of recognition in your eyes, but comes up a bit short.

"Can I help you?" He asks slowly, clearly confused.

"Hi, I'm Y/N. I can't remember which one of you I spoke with, I think his name was Sam. But I'm here to look at the room you guys are renting?" You ask gently, maybe you were in the wrong place.

"Oh! You're Y/N! Yes, yeah, I know who you are, come in." Recognition dawns on the blue-eyed boy's face. "By the way, I'm Steve. I don't know how much Sam has told you about us but I wasn't expecting a girl to want to live with three guys." He chuckles and you return the laugh.

"Yeah, I mean I was a bit hesitant at first because I thought I'd get murdered by you guys or something, but Sam made it very clear that you're all very nice people and won't watch me while I sleep." You reply with a small smile.

Steve looks at you in silence.

"Just kidding!" You let out a laugh. "But my mom was a bit worried about me living with three men, but I convinced her nothing bad was going to happen. I hope."

"Hey, seriously though, we wouldn't want to make you feel unsafe. I know being a woman in this day and age in New York can be... less than pleasant. We're big on respect here at 6A." He flashes you a smile that for sure has made a girl weak in the knees before.

"Thanks, Steve. I appreciate that. I mean I know you guys probably weren't expecting a girl as your fourth roommate, so I'm just happy to find space where I can."

"I mean, hey, it's not what we were expecting, but we're not picky people." Steve shrugs. "Wanna take a look at your room? Then we can go from there and get your stuff moved in."

"Sure, sounds great!"

He leads you down the hallway and opens a door, revealing the room you saw on the listing.

After chattering about the room and how they were excited to have you live with them, he takes you back to main living area to wrap up any other loose ends.

"Alright, so like I said we do have two bathrooms so you might have to share with Bucky, since his room is also on that side of the apartment but that shouldn't be a problem. And also, I can help move in your things if you don't wanna go through the hassle of getting moving guys and all that."

"Oh, you don't have to do that for me, I don't mind at all-"

"Hey, no worries, I'm happy to help." Steve smiles and you nod in response.

"Thanks. I didn't know I'd be getting such a deal moving in with you guys." You laugh.

"I'm just happy to help. I'm sure Sam and Buck can also help since they'll be around later tonight."

-

And so it began.

All of your boxes were in the rented U-Haul at the front of your new home. You text Steve to let him know you're downstairs, and a feeling sits in your gut.

You were nervous to live with three random stranger men. Granted, Sam and Steve were both so nice, and you really are getting a great deal with this apartment, being so close to your work and all.

"Hey Y/N! Let's get this show on the road." Steve comes outside, guns blazing, (literally, have you seen his biceps?), and ready to work.

It only takes an hour or so to get all your things inside, and Sam was waiting inside to take things directly to your new room. Although you still haven't met Bucky, you knew it couldn't be too bad. Steve and Sam were angels.

-

The first time you met Bucky was when he returned from his shift. He worked as a bartender. He had odd hours and often didn't come back until 3 AM most nights that he worked.

Hence, the reason why he was confused when he saw you in the kitchen in the middle of the night.

"Hey... who are you?" He asked, dropping his keys into the bowl next to the door.

"Oh!" Your head whipped around at the sound of the door shutting "Steve mentioned that you worked weird hours. I'm Y/N." You extend your hand to him. "I'm the new roommate. I hope they told you about me." You huff out a laugh, hoping he wouldn't be completely weirded out by you.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry, I totally missed that you were moving in today. Don't worry, they did mention you." He returned your smile while shaking your hand.

His large, callused hand engulfing yours made your heart pound in your chest. Jesus. Are all the guys who live here male models? What the hell?

"Well, it was really nice meeting you, Y/N. I'm gonna head to bed, work totally got me shot. I'll see you in the morning?"

"Yeah, yes. I'm usually out the door by 6:30 by the latest, so I'll catch you if you're up." You smile.

"6:30 in the morning? Yeah, no chance I'll see you then but you'll catch me before my shift. I forgot, Sam did mention you were a nurse."

"For sure, I also have the next day off so that'll probably be a bit more realistic."

"How about we go get breakfast that day? On me, consider it a welcome-to-the-apartment gift from me." Bucky's grin spreads across his face, and you can't help notice just how handsome he is.

"Deal, Bucky. Good night."

-

After you both got over the initial awkwardness, you and Bucky became the most unlikely pair. Sharing a bathroom was breeze, your schedules aligned perfectly some days, meaning that the two of you spent most of your free time together.

It was a strange feeling. You loved becoming friends with Bucky. He was so easy to talk to, and understood you better than most others. It was so natural and easy with him, like you'd known him forever.

But another part of you was falling for him, and you knew it. You chose to ignore it, deciding that it was silly and that you just liked him as a friend. A best friend, perhaps.

At times, he did little things that made you think otherwise, though.

The cuddling during movie nights. The 'I got this for you because it made me think of you's. It was something that ate at you daily.

You two practically did everything together. In a way, it was like being in a relationship, but with no pressure. No expectations. Just two people, hanging out and being there for the other. It meant nothing (but everything, at the same time.)

He was always there for you. After a hard shift, you came home and sat quietly while you talked about whatever it was that bothered you. And after his shifts at the bar, he did the same.

It was almost too easy, the way you two could fall into a rhythms so easily. It was so nice to have someone to have around after moving into a new place. You two clicked effortlessly, it seemed.

And of course, they don't call it falling in love for nothing.

-

Tonight, you had a night shift, which meant you went to bed all day until about 4 PM and then proceeded to get ready for your evening at the hospital.

You were in the bathroom washing your face and braiding your hair back, then pulling on your under-scrub top.

The door creaks open, revealing a smiling Bucky.

He's dressed head to toe in black; a tight t-shirt that looks like it's a size too small, black jeans, black leather boots, and finally, a leather jacket thrown over his arm.

"I hate when you have the night shift. I'm so lonely during the day, and of course you have it on my one night off." He whines, and you shoot him a look through the mirror.

"Well, I wouldn't have taken the night shift but they were offering extra pay since no one wanted to cover. Sorry, honey." You turn around and pat his chest to move him out of the doorway, an exaggerated pout on your face.

Fuck me, those eyes, Bucky thinks to himself at the gesture.

Your touch sent a flutter of butterflies against his stomach, making him move out of your way so you could pull on your socks and gather your things into your bag.

"Where are you all dressed up for on your night off then?" You ask out loud while stuffing your arms through your fleece jacket.

"I- uh, funny story, actually." He laughs out a cough, "I have a date." He presses his lips together.

"Oh. A date." You stop what you were doing, back turned to him.

You can feel his eyes burning through the back of your head, but you can't turn to face him right now. Snapping out your thoughts, you continue gathering your things.

"Yeah, this girl at the bar, she works as a waitress actually. She asked for my number, and well one thing led to another and-"

"You don't have to explain yourself to me, Buck. I'm happy for you. Have a great date, I have to run. Good luck." You muster the best smile you can in that moment and practically run out of your room.

"Wait, are you okay?" He asks in a rush, following close behind you.

"Of course I'm okay, why wouldn't I be? I have to get to work." You were almost an hour early. You stop to fill your water bottle from the fridge and make your escape. "I'll see you tomorrow!" You yell from the hallway before the door shuts, the slam resounding through the emptiness.

The moment of silence in the elevator gets you lost in your thoughts for a minute.

A date.

With a girl who works at the bar.

You don't know why this is hurting your chest so terribly. The thought of Bucky, your closest friend, going on a date, tugs at something.

Whatever happens, you know you can't say anything. It's not your place. You just have to let it run its course, whether it goes in a good direction or not. You have to just do your best to be happy for Bucky.

-

Meanwhile, back at the apartment;

"Did Y/N leave for work already?" Steve asks, coming out of his room.

"Yeah, she basically ran out even though her shift isn't til seven." Bucky's brows are furrowed, still standing in the middle of the kitchen thinking about how you practically raced to get away from him.

"Why'd she leave so early?" Steve asks in confusion, eyes flashing to the oven, seeing the digital clock flashing 5:56 PM. "It only takes her like 20 minutes to get there."

While discussing, Sam pops out of his own bedroom, listening in on the conversation between the two.

"I don't know, we were just talking about plans tonight and she got really weird, all of a sudden. She grabbed all her stuff for her shift and just bolted." Bucky was incredibly confused, and it was clear in his tone and facial expression.

He looked like a lost puppy.

"So what are you doing tonight?" Sam asks, wondering what was bothering you. Maybe it was something Bucky said?

"I was just hanging out in her room while she was getting ready, and then she asked what I was dressed for and I told her about that girl, Christina, the one from the bar that asked for my number and asked to go on a date. Then she basically ran." Bucky shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know what even happened, she even said I 'don't have to explain myself to her,' and that she had to leave."

Steve and Sam shoot a look between each other, the latter breathing out a deep sigh.

"What? What's that sigh?" Bucky asks.

"Nothing, Buck. Have you thought that maybe the date was what was bothering her? You two spend a lot of time together, and maybe she feels a little... blindsided by this date." Steve reasons.

"What? Why would she feel blindsided? I tell her everything. She tells me everything. That's just how we are." Bucky responds with a shake of the head, hands flailing in the air.

"But what about her? Does she tell you about the dates she goes on?" Sam asks, and Bucky's brows furrow.

"What dates? She goes on dates? With who?"

Another look shared between Steve and Sam.

"See, maybe she doesn't go on dates. I really don't know. But that reaction is why she felt hurt by you telling her about you going on a date." Steve explains.

Bucky's lost.

"She has feelings for you, Buck. She has feelings and she's hurt that you're going on a date because she never goes on dates, and now she's realizing that she's going to get left behind in the dust when you meet another girl." Sam supplies.

Now Bucky's even more lost.

"But... why wouldn't she tell me she has feelings for me? She's never even indicated that there was anything she felt for me more than friends do." He explains, now wracking his brain for every single interaction you two have had.

"Listen... we don't know what goes on when you guys are alone. But what I do know is that you guys spend a lot of time together, and I think you guys both have some... unspoken feelings for each other."

Bucky stands there, contemplating what this meant. What was he saying? That he should come clean to you about his feelings for you? That going on this date tonight would be a mistake?

Fuck, the date.

"Listen, I gotta go. My date's expecting me." Bucky quickly dismisses the entire conversation, putting him arms through the arms of his leather jacket before heading out the door.

Another sigh was shared between the two men left behind in the apartment.

-

There were pros and cons to working the night shift.

Pros included that it was calm, most of the time. Nights meant time to catch up on charting and paperwork while patients slept, checking in on them when needed.

Cons included the fact that one of the major thoughts blaring in your mind was 'WHILE YOU'RE SITTING HERE MEASURING THIS PATIENT'S OUTPUT, BUCKY IS ON A DATE WITH A SUPER HOT GIRL FROM HIS WORK!!!'

It sucked.

You wished you could shut it off. Of course, you always had to make sure you were giving your patients the best care possible, but your mind was plagued.

Would you ever tell him how you felt? Could you ever take that risk? The thought of even telling him, let alone being rejected, makes you sick to your stomach.

He would never speak to you again. It would be weird between you two, and then it would be weird between everyone in the apartment, and you would never be able to show your face again and would have to move out. There’s no other feasible option.

Unless…

Unless Bucky liked you back.

But you don’t even let your mind wander there, because you couldn’t even stomach the thought of not being around them. They were your family, the people you spent the most time with, the ones you could always count on when you had a rough day or needed a shoulder to lean on. Especially Bucky.

You simply couldn’t lose them.

And so, your night shift went on and the world still spun, even with your feelings buried deep in your chest.

-

When you walked into your apartment at 7:30 AM, there were some things you noticed that weren’t there when you had left.

First, it was the pretty black kitten heels by the door that certainly weren’t yours.

Then, for example, a cute leather purse hanging from a barstool by the kitchen island that wasn’t yours.

You put two and two together, and despite the harsh clench of your chest, you decided you were too tired to even think about all this right now. You just needed to take a shower and go straight to bed.

After staying true to your words, you had just shut the door to the bathroom when you heard it open again. Then, the water running from the tap, and then you see the handle of your door turning.

Immediately, you throw yourself under your covers and act like you had already been asleep. You simply couldn’t face Bucky right now. Not after knowing that he brought that girl home, and not after she was probably still in his bed. That was just too far for you.

With your face away from the door, you try and make your breaths as even as possible, hearing the door click open.

You could feel Bucky’s eyes burning into you, but you weren’t giving yourself away. You needed sleep before dealing with this.

Once you hear the door shut, you let out a big breath, your heart practically leaping out of your chest. And with that breath, you allow your eyes to only well with tears, but not letting them fall.

-

You woke again at 3 PM, but with knowing you had the next day off you weren’t in any rush to start your day. You didn't even want to move. You felt as though you got hit by a bus, between the racing thoughts about... well you know who they were about; and then piled on with the unexpected code in the middle of your shift, it was not a peaceful night.

You got your much needed rest, but you were in no mood to face Bucky right now.

But alas, your stomach spoke (rather growled violently), and you had to eat something before your stomach folded in on itself.

As you crack the door open to inspect the hall, you see that Bucky's door is closed but you hear noises from the direction of the living room.

You weigh your options.

Go out and make yourself something to eat and possibly face Bucky.

Starve.

Although the latter was looking like a great option, another whoosh from your stomach made you man up and step out of the room.

You couldn't even bring yourself to look at who was in the apartment, eyes dead-set on the pasta sauce you knew was in the fridge.

"Hey, Y/N! How was the night shift?" Sam's chirpy question came from the couch.

"It was alright, had a code but he pulled through. What did you two get up to last night?" You ask, seeing that Steve and Bucky were sitting on the couch opposite to Sam.

You couldn't even look him in the eye, while you knew he was watching you.

"Not much, just had a few beers and chilled til Buck got back, caused quite the ruckus." Sam lets out a laugh, but the words pierced through your heart as you pour the pasta into the boiling pot of water you'd set on the stove.

"Oh, nice." You reply, albeit shortly. You didn't know what to say. But of course, your mouth runs farther ahead than your brain. "How was that date, Bucky?"

You didn't care how the date was. You know she came back here, and you had absolutely zero interest in finding out what they did together. You couldn't handle hearing him tell you about it.

"It was... it was good. She came back here after." Was all he said. He looked at you with those wide, crazy eyes. You wanted to crumble under his gaze, but instead you just turned around to focus on your food.

"Nice. Great. I'm glad it went well for you." You said, not facing him.

The three boys give each other a look, and the tension could be cut with a knife.

Another loud growl from your stomach.

Fuck.

You check and the pasta is cooked. You drain it, pour your sauce and cheese, and practically sprint back to your room with a resounding click of your door through the apartment. Dishes be damned.

-

Outside, breaths were still held.

"Jesus, Sam. Could you have made it sound worse than it was?" Bucky grits through his teeth, pushing his shoulder aggressively.

"Well, you did bring her back here. Did I misspeak?" He responds.

"No, but we just hung out! Nothing even happened! Why is this even so awkward between us? It's not a crime if I did sleep with her." Bucky defends, but is confused about this situation.

"Well, it wouldn't be a crime, but it sure wouldn't be a good thing that you slept with someone else when you clearly have feelings for her!" Steve chimes in as quietly as possible.

-

You feel so stupid.

The urge hits you like a truck.

Should you also be going on dates? What was it that was so deeply holding you back from doing what Bucky's doing?

You could make all the excuses you want; busy with work, too tired, and that you were happy with your friendships and current relationships, even if they were all platonic.

But that was all before, when you thought Bucky felt the same.

You thought that he was also happy with the way you two were. Doing all the things people in relationships do, but not speaking out about those deeply-buried feelings. And that was enough. You didn't need someone to tell you they loved you as more than a friend, you didn't need that yearning feeling to be filled.

It was all bullshit, anyways. Right?

Right?

Right.

He could date people and have a girlfriend that he could do all those things with.

It didn't matter.

Because apparently, you weren't that person to him.

So you would just have to accept that and move on with your life.

Alone.

Again.

-

"Again with these damn feelings! You two don't even know your heads from your asses, and you wanna tell me about how my feelings!" Bucky scrambles for words. He feels hot and uncomfortable all over, all the while trying to not raise his voice.

"Bucky! You felt that tension in here? Right? That was because she had a problem! And it could all easily fixed if you just said, 'Hey, I know this is crazy, but I like you! And I didn't sleep with anyone else because of that!' Huh? How 'bout that?" Sam suggests, like it was the easiest thing to do in the world.

"Yeah, and what if she laughs in my face? What if that's totally not the case?!" Bucky responds.

"Buck, I think you just need to trust us on this one. She likes you and you like her. I don't know what else to tell you to make you understand." Steve finally sighs and drops his shoulders, over this whole conversation.

"Listen, she has tomorrow off. If you two end up hanging out, you need to say something. The tension is just too much." Sam just sighs and turns the TV on, preemptively ending the conversation.

Bucky just went into his room, placed his headphones over his head, and spent some time alone to think.

Let's think rationally.

You went on a date, and you didn't sleep with her.

What Bucky was coming to realize, is that there was a reason he didn't sleep with her.

He just couldn't.

It felt wrong, like he knew that there was a reason why he couldn't do it, subconsciously.

And he fully went into the date wanting to sleep with her. That was his goal. But he knew that if he did, it would be the point of no return. For some reason, he just felt it in his gut.

Realistically, even if I slept with her, I probably would've been sick with myself. I couldn't even face her after that.

But why?

Because you like her, you absolute moron.

He thinks of all the moments shared between you two. The stares, the cuddling, the innocent touches that drove him insane. All of those things added up in his mind to become one big jumble of feelings and now his brain felt like it was going to burst from how much this was all hitting him at once.

He springs off his bed.

Before he even turns the corner into the living room, words are spilling out of his mouth.

"You know what, maybe subconsciously even my body knew not to sleep with her, but even then how could I know for sure she likes me?-"

But there you are, sitting between Steve and Sam, tears leaking out of the corners of your eyes, gazing up at him in shock.

Clearly, you three were in the middle of something.

"You didn't sleep with her?" Your voice is meek at the question.

"No. I couldn't do it." He says, like it was obvious.

"Why not?" You fire back.

"I- I just... can we not do this out here? Please?" Bucky practically begs. He can't confess his deep and utter devotion to you in front of his two best friends. They'd never let him live it down.

"Come with me." Bucky runs into his room, throwing you a hoodie of his that he knew you were partial to, and then slid on his own jacket. Shoes are stuffed onto his feet, and he sees you doing the same, but your eyes never leave his figure in confusion.

The keys are grabbed from the bowl, and the door swings open while he holds it open for you.

Before Bucky lets the door shut, he gives Sam and Steve a final look; meanwhile the two are jumping up and down and pumping their fists in the air silently. It was almost comical.

"Where are we going?" Your voice from behind him startles him a bit, forgetting what he was even supposed to be doing.

"Just- put this on, honey." He hands you his spare motorcycle helmet, and you almost want to protest, but you wanted to see where this was going.

So you comply and hold onto him for dear life while he weaves in and out of traffic.

He stops, finally, in front of the place you know Bucky always comes to when he has too much on his mind.

It's a wide expanse of the city, a rooftop that he somehow had access to; and you weren't sure what you were doing here.

"What are we doing here?" You don't even let your mind think about what he was here to tell you.

Was he here to break the news to you that he was seeing this girl?

But you still couldn't figure out why he would bring you here to tell you that, and why he hadn't slept with her last night. Did she mean more to him than he let on? Is that why he wanted to wait to sleep with her?

The thought sends you heart sinking into your stomach.

"I have something I need to tell you." Bucky pauses and gazes so deeply into your eyes, something swimming in his blue irises, but you couldn't tell what. That was what scared you the most.

"I... I haven't been completely honest with you about how I've been feeling as of late. And I can't keep... keep being dishonest to myself and you, Y/N."

Tears were welling against your lashline, begging to be released at his words.

This was it. It’s all about to be over for good.

He approaches closer, hands coming to your jawline; his hold so delicate and soft that it makes you even more upset.

"Y/N... You are the most important person in my life. I can't imagine sharing any part of my life without you. You're the only person I want to see when I have something on my mind, I yearn for your touch when you aren't there, and lately, I've been confused as hell trying to understand why." His soft voice makes you weak in the knees.

Cue more tears.

"I just... I'm sorry I waited so long to tell you. And I'm sorry I went on that date... I'm sorry for a lot of things."

"Can I ask you something?" You ask quietly.

"Of course, honey."

"Why didn't you sleep with her?"

The weight of the question sits heavily in the air, and Bucky's features soften a smidge.

"I couldn't do it. I tried to get myself into it, into her. Both figuratively and literally." He laughs at his own joke, "but no part of me wanted to spend time with her over you. All I could think about was you. The entire date, I was thinking about what you were doing. What you were thinking about. You're all that takes up my mind these days. It kills me, not being around you when you're gone. I wish I could express to you how much I love you, but there aren't any words that could explain the extent of my feelings for you, Y/N. All I can really say is that I love you. You're my best friend. I can't think of anyone else who has the same effect on me that you have."

All you can think of you when you hear those words is the pounding in your chest and the fluttering in your lungs.

A wet, snotty smile crosses your face and you let out a garbled laugh.

"You love me?" Your hands slide up his chest to his shoulders, fingers grasping onto them.

"For as long as I can remember, honey. You're everything to me. The stars, the moon, the sky. It's all you." He returns the same smile, large thumbs caressing under your eyes to swipe at the fallen tears at his admission. "Do you love me?"

The way he asks you the question makes it sound so minuscule, so minute and almost childish, because you think he knows the answer.

"I do. I love you so much that I can't even think properly when I'm around you, Bucky. You take up every inch of my heart and my mind. I love you." You confess, the words spilling out of you like they belonged to him.

The grin that stretches across his cheeks is almost unreal, like a cartoon character. You could practically see the hearts in his eyes at your words.

The kiss that he molds upon your lips with his own steals all the air out of your lungs, and while one of your hands threads through his soft locks at the nape of his neck and your eyes fall shut, the other slides down to his chest, resting right over his heart.

You feel it against your palm and fingers, the pounding of the organ at the feeling of finally kissing you.

You wish he could feel yours, equally as loud and obvious.

His own hands are cradling your cheeks ever so gently, but the way he's kissing you is anything but. It was full of want, need, yearning. Everything you’ve been waiting for for months, finally being released in this moment.

When he finally pulls away for air, your eyes remain closed. You never wanted this moment to end, and if you opened your eyes now, you're afraid you'll wake and this will all be a cruel dream.

"Let me see those eyes, sweetheart." He mumbles and you can almost feel the words against your lips.

When your eyes peel open again almost drowsily, Bucky's smile is all you see. His nose is still brushing against yours, and you feel weak in the knees all over again at the proximity.

"I love you. And you love me. You know what that means?" He says.

"What?" Is all you can muster to reply at the moment.

"It means I owe those two bozos at home an apology and a beer, probably."

The laugh that escapes you lights him up inside, the sound being his favorite thing in the world. If he could make you laugh forever, he'd die a happy man.

"They knew this whole time, y'know? They actually confronted me about it. I didn't even tell them first. I guess I was just that obvious." You laugh at the memory, Bucky fondly smiling.

"I expect nothing less from them. You should've seen Sam before I left last night. Acting like he was your dad or something." Bucky's large arms come to wrap around you, holding you against his body.

"Oh, I wouldn't wanna be on side of Sam's attitude. I'm glad you made it out alive." You giggle once more, arms looping around his neck.

"Now when we go back I'm gonna have to face the 'I told you so's' from them. Kill me now." He rolls his eyes at the thought.

"Well, if they kill you now, you wouldn't be able to take me out to dinner tomorrow night." You tell him coyly, like the idea was already put in place.

"Huh, seems like you're right, honey. Couldn't leave my one and only girl hanging."

Bucky finally releases you from his hold- not that you wanted to be released of it- and walks towards the stairwell to head back down.

"C'mon. We've got a movie and ice cream waiting for us at home, sweetheart." He holds out his hand, and you don't hesitate to leap forward and grab it in your own.

"Let's go, Buck. I have lots to tell you about my shift last night."

"Oh, I'm sure the night shift was just riveting." He laughs as he leads you down the steps.

"Yeah, well all I could really think about was you being on a date with that girl, so yeah, maybe not the most pleasant time to have all night to yourself." You scoff.

"Well, you're never gonna have to worry about that again, will you?" He steals another peck from your lips, the blush creeping across your face at the gesture.

"I suppose not, no."

-

fin.

[sarcasticassian]

okay so I need to ramble through my thoughts for a sec

Buck still seems to struggle with like actually saying the word bisexual etc so he just sort of ignores it because he has a boyfriend who he's super attracted to and he enjoys being with him so he hand waves it away and also he thinks his boyfriend has it all figured out, he seems so confident and cool so he just sort of accepts that he's attracted to Tommy and doesn't seem to think about the rest ig? because he doesn't want to seem like a fuck up or something in front of Tommy maybe? not sure or he's just not ready to think/talk about it idk but that's a little odd after six months

the basketball tickets, they kissed for the first time the day of the basketball game where Buck was being unhinged (love him) so at least to Tommy basketball obviously holds some significance for them and either Buck doesn't actually mind basketball all that much or he's not wanted to say he doesn't like it because he's a people pleaser etc etc

also the lack of gift on Buck's end was odd? just a side note

the moving in thing, Buck seems to forget Tommy has a whole house? and i've seen people say how he seems to want Tommy to fit into his life and doesn't seem to consider how the loft might be a bit impractical and stuff and I'm not ragging on Buck here I'm just thinking about how it comes across like he just dives all in after admitting he spiralled

so in that convo Tommy hears move in with me and the implication that Buck still sort of sees him on this pedestal and I'd freak out too I think, not to mention the Abby of it all, so he sort of just shuts down and starts talking about firsts and lasts because the illusion of perfect has to shatter at some point and he's in so deep already that Buck breaking it off would hurt a lot (what he said wasn't cool but I'm just gonna lay that one at the writer's feet for now i think)

they both clearly love(?) each other though like right up until the convo goes downhill they're being sweet and stuff and then Buck even mentions marriage and things like underneath all of this he does see a future with Tommy

the Evan/Buck was just there to hurt ig?

also they ended it with pretty much the same line as the flop first date which makes it seem like that was obvs where it was going to end before they realised they had something good but if it was all just going to end the same anyway why bother at all?

it could all be a tactic to give Buck the space he needs within the narrative or whatever to figure out the bisexual of it all whilst unattached on screen and maybe it all leads back to Tommy eventually anyway or we're in the break up portion of a rom com or like they give him some character development and he fights for something and we get a parallel of a second chance like their coffee date

or it could literally just all be kinda bad writing and that's goodbye Tommy it was nice knowing you which is sad

so do we be delusional or nah? I just don't understand all the other things that came before for that kinda messy blindside to be it? like why the 217 engine because that wouldn't be cheap, why Tommy's truck the episode before, why comment on giving Buck a LI that ties to the firefam etc etc like I don't wanna clown but also I'm so good at it

and if it is the end then no helicopter crash? what a waste, if you're gonna have easy access to a pilot then why not? and its something a bit different, I know we've had incidents here and there but a big proper helicopter crash hasn't been done before I don't think? I know they kinda rescued Taylor from one but we didn't see it go down or anything

[pastafossa]

Hey pasta, I hope you don't find this too personal a question: but, where online do you connect with witches and witchiness the most? I'm wanting to get back into it a little bit, but I don't wanna use what I was before. The problem is, I don't really know where to find information anymore. Anywho, i hope you're having a good day! Thanks in advance <3

I don't mind this question at all! It's a legitimate one because it's kinda hard to know where to go with everything so spread out!

Online I primarily connect with general witchiness in these ways:

Pinterest. A lot of it's aesthetic but I tend to seek out the more info-based pins - different rituals and design ideas, correspondences, links to informational blog posts, stuff like that. There's a TON of info people have helpfully gathered there. I always cross reference and double-check before I use something, just to be safe, but a lot of it's solid. Also has good book recs!

I have a few people on witchtok that I follow - some are local witches I trust and others do a lot of informational tiktoks I find helpful. Granted, there's a LOT of meh stuff to dig through, but there's some really great people there who do good work (if you want a few names just message me)

I get a few newsletters from local places, but also from sites like The Wild Hunt which has articles about paganism and witchcraft, general related news, along with some educational articles by elders and experienced members in the community.

I do occasionally skim the various witchcraft subreddits. I've found those hit or miss, but sometimes you get lucky!

To connect to other witches online:

There's def a little community here on tumblr! I follow a few of the blogs and go browse the tags every now and then, and it's small but active and social, so this is worth looking into!

Gd, there are a ton of us on tiktok, and while it's not always easy to socially connect, I know (at least where I am) a lot of my local witch community advertises there when we have events so it's a good way to see who's around you locally!

This is one I'm exploring, but I know there are some on discord and that's where I've seen a lot of migration to from older, dying sites like FB.

MEETUP! There are a lot of places advertising virtual AND physical witchy meetups! That's how I found my local community in my city - the witchy shop about 3 mins away from my house (that I didn't even know existed) was doing a tarot class and I took it, and now I'm part of a local community which does everything from educational beginner classes on various elements of the craft, to group meetups just for general chats, to public rituals (just did a Mabon one the other evening!).

So those are where I generally connect with witchy people and info online, and it's primarily where I found a lot of my info before I moved to my new city and was able to tap into a pre-existing community. The landscape is changing so quickly right now, it's gd wild, but hopefully this can give you some leads! ❤️

[ask-orchidthemew]

Europa, Ganymede, and Io are open for asks!

ASK: Honestly Pali, don't waste your time on that dick. He doesn't deserve to be a part of your life if all he'll do is treat you like trash.

PALI: I agree. Obviously going our separate ways was working. I'll be sure to return to the status quo... right after I find out where he's going. And maybe beat some answers out of him. Dialga, why is he going all the way out here? Oh, he stopped?

AEON: Hello, wildcat. We take it everything has been running smoothly on your end?

ORCHID: Ugh, more or less. Found something that could lead me to my lost memories. Went through hell to get it, though..

PALI: Is he... is he talking to someone!? Oh Dialga has he actually gone mad?

AEON: Be wary, it is dangerous to fixate on the past too often. Let's see what you've brought us today.

[Orchid used RE:integrate]

PALI: Wha... is... is that a RIFT!?

AEON: We're surprised we haven't already found something like this. Where did you find it?

ORCHID: Some old mew temple. I don't even wanna get into the shitshow that turned out to be.

AEON: We see. Then this should be no issue to collapse.

[AEON used ?????. It was super effective!]

PALI: What the bloody hell? Did Orchid just open and collapse a rift?? Since when could he do that?

AEON: Thank you for bringing this to us, wildcat, but it seems that we both should take our leave. Seems that you're not alone.

[AEON has fled]

ORCHID: SHIT! I've been followed!

[EUROPA used Fling. EUROPA flung her light orb!]

ORCHID: GRAAAAAAAH!!!

[ORCHID is paralyzed! It can't move!]

EUROPA: SEE! I TOLD YOU GUYS!!

PALI: -thinking- Oh no, that voice...

EUROPA: I TOLD U SMTH WAS WEIRD ABT THEM!!

GANYMEDE: Yes yes, you've told us many, many times. Despite how poorly you've described it.

EUROPA: Um, how abt a thank u Eura??? U literally never wouldve found them w/out me??? Theyve been givin suuuper off vibes ever since I saw them! And BAM! They just made a rift!

IO: mmm... but did you like... need to paralyze them...? seems kinda... um... cruel... i guess...?

EUROPA: Wut was I sposed 2 do? They woulda ran if I confronted them!

IO: yeah... i guess youre right. their soul is... like... super janked up and stuff... never seen nothin like it before...

GANYMEDE: I agree. Perhaps it's best if we take it to Mother. She should know how to sort this out.

EUROPA: Fine. But Im takin the credit 4 this 1.

[EUROPA, GANYMEDE, and IO cast a Transplanar Mirror Warp spell. EUROPA, GANYMEDE, and IO have fled]

PALI: Arceus... they're going to take him to mum. -inhale- Nope. Not my problem. He got himself into this mess, he can get himself out.

[im-a-matt-girl]

@mattslovergirl here is a fic based on your 4th request, a meetcute:

I hear the PA system call out my flight number. "Last call," the robotic voice announces. "Please make your way to the gate now."

I start running. I hope I still have time to make it. I hate traveling so much; it makes me panic like nothing else. My backpack is falling off of my shoulder, making me unbalanced.

Suddenly, something hits my shoulder, knocking me down. Both my tote bag and my backpack go flying. I hear people saying, "Oooh," but nobody stops to help.

"Are you okay?" I hear a gentle voice say.

I look up, and I am met with the most beautiful face I've ever seen. "I… uh… I think so," I say. I can't even look you directly in the eyes, you're so attractive.

"Here, let me help you up," you say, extending your hand toward me.

I take it, and you carefully pull me up. I watch, dumbfounded, as you pick up my things for me. "Thanks," I utter.

"Of course," you smile at me. "Where were you running to?"

"My gate," I explain. "They made the last call, and it's kind of far from here, and I don't know if I'll make it at this point, and-"

"It's okay, slow down," you tell me calmly. "Let me carry something for you." You hook my tote bag to your suitcase handle. "Lead the way," you say, gesturing to me.

You follow me all the way to my gate, and they close it off as we approach. "Wait!" I tell them.

"Sorry, Miss, you just missed the flight," the attendant says to me. "You'll have to wait for the next one."

I want to cry, but I know it's my own fault, anyway. I turn to you and apologize. "Thanks for trying to help me, but… I'm sorry, it seems like it was all for nothing."

"Not a problem," you say, shaking your head and smiling at me.

"Don't you have somewhere to be, though?" I ask you. "I'm so sorry to be an inconvenience to you-"

You gently put a hand on my shoulder. "It's okay, really," you reassure me. "Besides, this is my gate, too. I'm going to L.A. also."

I raise my eyebrows in surprise. "You are? Did you miss your flight, too?"

You laugh softly. "No, I'm early for my flight. It's the next one. I'm just waiting for my brothers. They'll be here in a bit."

"Oh…" I say. "How many brothers do you have?"

"Three," you answer. "But only two of them are coming with me. I'm actually a triplet."

"No way!" I exclaim. "Are you serious?"

"Yep," you nod. "Oh, look, here they come."

"Matt, where the fuck were you?" one of your brothers says to you. "We were looking all over. You're not answering your texts."

"Sorry, I got kinda… busy," you tell him, looking sideways at me.

Your other brother smiles at me. "Is this a fan?" he asks you.

"I don't think so," you say, shaking your head. "She didn't even know that I was a triplet."

Both of your brothers look absolutely gobsmacked.

"She ran into me and dropped her stuff, so I helped her get to her gate, which happens to be our gate, too," you explain to them.

"Oh, you're the one I ran into?" I ask, horrified. "Oh, my gosh, I am so, so sorry! Now I feel really bad…"

"It's okay," you chuckle.

"Hi, I'm Chris," your brother says, waving at me. "We're the Sturniolo triplets."

I wave back, not knowing what to say. "Uh… hi," I stammer awkwardly. I'm painfully shy.

"I'm Nick," your other brother says quickly, holding his hand out. "Pleasure to meet you."

I shake his hand. His mood changed so fast, I don't exactly know what to make of him, yet. "Same to you," I say politely.

"Where're we sitting?" Chris asks you.

"I haven't decided, yet," you say, looking around the area for four adjacent, empty chairs.

"So… you're Matt?" I ask you. "We never formally introduced ourselves," I remind you.

"Oh yeah, sorry," you smile again. You have the most alluring smile I've ever seen in my life. "I'm Matt. You wanna sit with us? We can get to know each other while we wait for the plane."

"Sure," I smile shyly.

We talk so much, it seems like the plane arrives quickly. You all seem like lovely people.

The three of you board the plane before me, and I end up sitting behind you. I watch as you talk and laugh and argue with each other the entire flight. I am able to discern that Nick is the oldest, based on his somewhat bossy yet caring personality; and Chris definitely exudes baby brother energy.

At one point, when Nick gets up to use the restroom on the airplane, Chris turns to me and says, "Well, since Matt's not making any moves, can we get your socials?"

"Oh!" I look up in surprise. I wasn't sure if any of you had noticed me sitting behind you, since I've tried not to bother you this whole time. "Um, sure." I get my pen and notebook out of my backpack, and I scribble my online username and hand it to him.

"Sweet," Chris says, taking the paper from me. "We'll add you soon, so keep an eye out." He smiles at me, and while his smile is similar to yours, it definitely carries a more charming quality than an enigmatic one, like yours does.

Once the plane lands, I am able to get wi-fi on my phone again. My socials start sending me notification after notification, and I can't keep up with all of them. I decide not to look at them until I'm back home. I figure it's just you guys, anyway.

"See ya!" I hear a voice call out to me as I'm about to exit the airport.

I turn around and see you, waving at me. Your two brothers are walking ahead of you. "Bye!" I smile and wave at you. I'm so glad to have made three new friends today.

[the-monkey-ruler]

Are there adaptions where wukong ‘quits’ being a buddha so that he can just be immortal and do whatever without worrying about buddhist morals? I’m going to assume that’s what happened with monkie kid.

I mean… I’ve certainly never seen a take with someone quit being Buddha as I don't think that is a thing? At least not something I’ve ever seen because it’s not a job per say. Not like in Eastern Heaven where you can just quit your job of being a deity and go down to earth as an immortal. Well, you can't really either cause that is abandoning your post and you would be hunted down and charged for your crimes but that can still happen. Hence why if you wanna stay just an immortal you don't try to get a position in heaven but then against never see someone reject a position in heaven either so I don't know what would happen.

Being Buddha isn't really a destination that you reach and that’s it as enlightenment is more of a continual journey thought-out life. It's clearing your mind of wants and desires to see the world better and understanding what the best choice of action would be not just for yourself but those around you. There aren't really courses of action someone has to follow as it's a state of mind, not a duty. Western Heaven is different because being a Buddha means reaching enlightenment… you can’t exactly… unenlightened yourself? At least I've never heard someone forcing themselves to lack prior knowledge and like... limit their worldview on purpose.

Enlightenment and Buddhahood allows one to see reality for what it is and what your place is in both in the world around you and in your own mind. The first step to reaching it is to not reach for it in the first place as is it to come to you. Everything you absorb through the world is through your mind and your mind is your world but the world is always changing and thus your mind is always changing as well. It takes study and practice to achieve that grasp of that ultimate reality without denying the ever-changing mind either. To reach the level of nirvana and to be free of worldly delusions. Similar to how when Tathagata left the home to understand who he was is when he stripped away of all his titles and possessions. Who are you when the world around changes? Do you change with it or do you stay the same? That kinda disconnect with yourself leads to the honesty of what you are and that lets you feel every moment of your existence. And its that kinda fearlessness to look at yourself and find the compassion to reach out to others that helps someone reach that state of knowing not only themselves but also the world.

Sorry, I kinda went on a tangent there but I what I mean is that being a Buddha isn't a job and not something that is supposed to hold holding you back or 'worrying' you.

And again, this is all from what I have seen in adaptations, but I Lotus Lantern 2005 and New Gods Rebeon: Nezha, Wukong is still a lot of free reign after being the Victorious Fighting Buddha. He can still be on earth and help when he wants to even in a more hands off approach, only getting as involved as he sees necessary. If anything if there was a piece of media where Wukong is going back on his vows he could revert back to his warlord days and decide to go against his principles of mercy and compassion which could be an interesting take. But. He can’t exactly just go like 'I quit' from reaching a higher plane of thinking.

It’s more likely Flying Bark is skipping over the Buddha stuff in general. Which you know isn't unheard of. It's strange and I've only seen it in like comedy pieces or romance media so you know keeping things simple. Some adaptations have it that the pilgrims can go back to earth for more lessons as life is always a constant learning experience. But Wukong would probably be more limited without his Buddha title as that doesn't put him under Eastern Heaven's jurisdiction rather he is protected under Western Heaven. If anything he would lose more mobility without it as he would be back under Eastern Heaven rulings which would also be an interesting take but one I don't think they are having.

There is Taste of Love (2015) 紫霞 where he goes back to earth in the cycle of reincarnation for the sake of his lost love. Till We Meet Again - Prequel (2018) 千年来说对不起之前传 is similar in that Wukong chose to be reincarnated to find another lost love in the future. Wukong, Wukong (2030) 悟空，悟空 is another reincarnation Wukong story so hard to say if he was punished and was sent to earth or choose to go down for more cultivation.

Those are the most I can say "Wukong giving up his title" I can find but it looks like most for the sake of true love and in no cases he isn't reincarnated.

[polyamorouspunk]

Hello to my fave polypunk blog!

Now, it's totally okay if you don't feel like giving advice on the matter, since it's not directly about poly relationship stuff (although I am), but, I've got no better ideas on who to ask since my partners have all pretty much shrugged and been like "IDK I don't know the best play here either." But yeah, feel totally free to just leave this one in the ask box.

So, theoretically, if you were a trans guy flirting with a gay man over the web who has never seen you, how would you go about gauging his interest in trans guys without necessarily implicating yourself and ruining whatever image he's got of you in his head?

Technically, I suppose it doesn't matter, since I doubt we'll ever really meet. But it would be nice to be able to flirt without like, avoiding mentioning aspects of your own body, hence, wanting to find out. But also, it's fun to be casually flirty, and it would be sad and would hurt if he suddenly viewed me as a girl and started treating me like one. So I'd rather keep the illusion of being a cis guy alive for him if he doesn't have interest in trans bodies. Not because I want to "trick" him, but more because, since we're never gonna meet anyway, I'd rather he imagine me as a cis boy than a girl, and therefore talk to me as one, because it's been cathartic to have that kind of unhesitant acceptance of my masculinity.

Again, ultimately, it doesn't really matter. It's casual, for fun, unserious flirting. It's fun enough as it is, and we both know it isn't gonna go anywhere so a little bit of feeding into a fantasy isn't really a problem. I can keep playing the role of a guy who has been a guy the whole time. But it would be doubly nice to let that last bit of guard down.

As it stands, I've already often mentioned that "people mistake me for a girl all the time", and that "puberty didn't treat me well so I never got a deep voice or any height, but at least it gave me a fat ass and nice tits in exchange", and shown my tiny delicate hands after mentioning how they aren't very manly-looking, which aren't particularly damning factors on their own, but I feel like if I outright ask how he feels about trans guys after all that, the pieces are gonna click and change his mental picture of me whether or not I want him to change it yet, so I was hoping you might be able to think of a subtler method.

No I totally feel that. That’s why it’s so much easier for me to be like online as a trans guy (ish) instead of like irl because like. I do not pass at all. And right now I’m not looking to pass. But when I have an unrealistic crush on a gay guy a part of me always wants to be like “hey… ya like… boys… who don’t look like boys… or sound like boys… or ID as boys 90% of the time….” Like yeah the amont of gay dudes I have a crush on is. Sad. Like. Yeah.

I’m in kind of a similar place, perhaps like a tangential place, where I’ve been playing the “no gender, no problem” game a bit and I kinda wanna be like. Actually yeah this is my gender.

Like it’s nice when people online see you as just “a guy”, not cis, not trans, etc. Or see you as not even a girl or a guy just a person. I think it can be subtle enough if you can say something like “so do a lot of gay guys date pre-op trans guys or is it like they gotta have a dick and if that’s the case do they date a lot of post-op trans guys?”

Or, go the “character” route where you pick a [identity] character and talk about them. Like, this is SUCH a bad example but I know in 911 Lone Star there’s an arc where a trans guy is trying to date and he gets outed or outs himself or something and it goes bad because the trans thing like idk bringing it up as a “fictional character” is something I’ve seen suggested for polyamory and also suggested for polyamory. I hope that makes sense.

Or you could talk about how YOU have dated trans people and see where that leads. Like “yeah I dated a trans guy once it was great” and they maybe say something idk.

I hope something like that helps and as always if anyone else has any advice I’m open to them dropping it.

[noblechaton]

so ultimately I really enjoyed season 5 as a whole and think it might be my new favorite season of ml in general since most episode were bangers and the finale eps weren't really any different lmao

but there's two elements that - like other folks I've seen - are kinda bugging me and bog it down a good bit I feel and I kinda wanna ramble about em. ml spoilers below (no salt tho I am complaining somewhat)

the first thing was something I'd caught a glimpse of just before I passed out last night thanks to some lovely blogging from a few mutuals and that I caught onto midway thru the second part of the finale and that is of course the weird attempt at seemingly redeeming? Gabriel in some capacity

now of course he's not at all redeemed to us, the audience, and it doesn't feel like a redemption so much as like. absolving him? but either way like....why at all? 5 seasons (2 specials and a video game too) across like 8 years I feel sorta showed that the guy legit could not be redeemed, especially S5 itself with multiple instances of him doing just. unforgivably heinous things to everyone including that son of his he kept talking about protecting and like for a time in the show maybe I could have seen that path where he was genuinely doing this to improve Adrien's life but that was tossed a long time ago lmao, he's actively tormented Adrien more than anything and that's without factoring in his beatings of Chat Noir, threats towards Marinette, etc.

Gabriel sacrificing himself at the end was something I sorta always knew was coming bc nothing else really made sense. no way he'd go to jail, he couldn't just be absolved of all he'd done and there was no real other option and yet they tried to absolve him anyway?? not to mention how little sense I feel it makes for Adrien to believe this in the least after even just the last few episodes, let alone the season and then some

Paris in general treating Gabriel like a hero sucks - most of the class at least should know better - and while I think there's a chance it'll lead to some juicy drama between Marinette knowing the truth and Lila knowing what she knows, one of them feels bound to take it to Adrien, I'm concerned it'll just be a flat point never to be addressed again

now I've often felt the show is more clever than ppl give it credit for but idk. something about it just feels weird and wrong and not just bc of what it is on the surface - Marinette building a lie into her relationship with Adrien is fascinating and it should absolutely come up in the future, but I'm worried it won't

and the reason I'm worried is bc of how Adrien was handled in the finale - in that he wasn't really handled at all

I understand that the story had him locked up in a cube, I get that he was purposefully tossed aside by that same father he supposedly believes is heroic now but like....why did we get nothing from him past him forfeiting the ring? why did he give up so easily? why was he a total nonentity in the finale of what is, essentially, his arc? in this story that has the most bearing on Adrien, Adrien himself was just....gone for most of it, arguably all of it

I feel like it flies counter to a lot of what the show's been doing especially lately with him in how Adrien is basically stripped of any and all agency by the end of the finale and honestly I hate it lol. him having no say on anything, no knowledge of anything or any real reaction to....anything that happened. we don't see him really react to the lie of what his father did, to Nathalie being returned to health or to the mysterious blonde woman at the pool who may or may not be his actual mom (the storyboards and deleted scene apparently confirm it was, at least, at some point), we don't even see him get his ring back. like I wasn't expecting a reveal at this point - I don't think we're gonna get one tbh - but....nothing??

which is part of why I feel the stuff at the end with him and Marinette in the garden - while very nice and cathartic after 8 years of watching - felt so off, almost hollow. Adrien didn't really get to be a character in the finale and just sort of reappears to finally kiss Marinette again? that's it? he's all smiles and sunshine again after being genuinely, undeniably tortured by his father that he again somehow believes is heroic in some manner? huh??

I think I'd feel better about things if we at least got his reaction to things - if he somehow rolled up on his destroyed house or found Nathalie walking around under her own power or w/e but there's just nothing. like he's an action figure that got lost under the bed for a bit. and again there's a chance we get some of that next season but like, not only do I think we shouldn't have to but I also see it as less likely than the Gabe stuff proving to be a plotline since that feels much more like a lingering presence that sorta needs to be dealt with and honestly Tomoe needs to be dealt with too idk how Kagami could ever go back to her after this

which really has me excited about season 6 more than I was - I admittedly kinda groaned when they revealed there'd be more seasons since I knew about the 5 season arc (especially since main villain Lila did not interest me in the least at the time lol, and still kinda doesn't tbh) but if I'd sorta softened on the decision across the last few years, I've fully turned around with this - so long as they address some of this stuff going forward at least bc I feel like if nothing else there's some really juicy drama and story potential in the Gabriel lie coming undone

ultimately again I loved this season and felt the finale was appropriately crazy - the kwamis in their ultimate forms, Gimmi's appearance, Bug Noir and the fight across the mansion, it all worked really well imo and there was a lot of payoff still in the finale even if I feel they didn't really stick the landing with a couple of rough edges and odds and ends hanging out

I also wanna say that I kinda like the ideas I've seen floating around about how the epilogue might not be what it seems - that Gabriel's wish wasn't so pure in nature, it kinda fits him to warp reality in just such a way after all but idk if that's what's going on here for sure yet. think it'd make a really cool twist if that evil AU special thingy came straight off of this tho, or if we got midway thru S6 and it's like, oh dang we're living a total fabrication!! I love stuff like that lol

also also ngl I am not excited about the whole team being back at all in any capacity lol. think a smaller team - which would now be Ladybug, Chat, Carapace, Rena, Ryuko and Argos maybe - just works better

also also also - addendum that ties into the Adrien stuff - it feels really weird that Chat Noir wasn't present at all during Monarch's defeat right? like. idk that just doesn't sit well with me, like he should have had some impact there, some role. maybe he could have broken out and given Ladybug the ring himself (albeit in a mask or something) or done literally anything. idk. really weird

[magic-owl]

This is great fun to read for me because I don't know who you mean but one of my darling pairings has a guy I (and many others) would describe as "the stressed angry pissy one" and people looove to write him getting taken out of his head by his partner(s). A huge group of people looked at this guy and thought "he needs to relax so much and we will provide this relaxation by way of many orgasms and a nicer environment". Literally never seen him have the lead unless they were roleplaying. It's the wrong guy but take heart, at least one stressed pissy angry guy is getting forcefully passenger princesse-d into having a good time out there. (Also, hi, hope you're having a good - day? evening? night?)

AGH THIS WAS SITTING IN MY DRAFTS BECAUSE I WANTED TO TYPE OUT A RAMBLY RESPONSE AND THEN I FORGOT ABOUT IT AGH I'M SORRY

anyhow, fkshdk I’m so glad you enjoyed! rest is under spoilers for Mature Content Discussion™️

alas but i unfortunately have chronic case of Not Wanting To Bother People Who Follow Me In Public and also embarrassment about Liking Ships TOO Much On Main because anxiety tells me i'll be annoying people by talking about them. dm me if you want specifics tho!

and omg yes so happy for you and your blorbos! feel free to tell me more about them, they sound fun!!!!! you Get me about making the pissier one relaaaaaax

yeahhhh fr when i'm reading stuff with sex scenes in them, my mind is still super duper anal (no pun intended lol) about what the scene says about the character, even if it's literally just a 2k oneshot primarily centered around a specific kink for enjoyers of that kink. my brain is still like "ok but what does this mean for this character that they're acting this way and the emotions they're feeling"

i also wanna clarify i literally do not caaaaaare whose body parts go where or like, positions or any of that nonsense, people who get Worked Up about that are either weird, or they're having misdirected reactions to the fandom plague that is assigning personalities to sex positions

but so like my current thing is that in what i'm seeing in the newer rounds of e-rated fic for the pairing i'm into rn, they've more often than not got the one who's more commonly characterized as the type-A control freak at the steering wheel in the smut scenes and like. i get it's just personal authorial preference and like, good for them, good for them, enjoy yourselves!

but alsooooooo let my man RELAX lol he's already overthinking everything else in his life, if you let him cling to control too hard during sex he's gonna give himself an ulcer. and like, other half of the ship definitely has the right character type to be able to be aware of this and take over and be like "ok you goober let me help you get out of your head for a second"

there is a lot that can be discussed in this ship in the giving and taking of control and possession, especially with character prior backstories, but i feel like ppl don't deep dive that enough in their porn for my own specific taste xD

anyway i also think that what i've been rambling about is what i'm looking for in a specific scenario, another pairing take i'd like to see more of from them is to just make the sex scene more emotionally messy and out of control in general, they're both kinda messy if you really look

[notebookmusical]

Hi! How are you? I hope you're having a good week. this will probably be a shorter ask and I might forget some stuff. I have not watched the Bonnie and Clyde proshot yet either. I have been so horrible at watching stuff lately especially when musicals can be pretty long lol. It sucks..but I'm excited cuz I haven't seen it in a long time, and my sister isn't very familiar with the show at all besides a few songs. I also just think watching pro shots will help me remember the musical more..plot wise and the more you watch it cuz bootlegs aren't really good quality lol. Idk why but I think they changed Waitress being shown on PBS so not sure when I'll watch it either..but I just wanna say I love your recent gifsets of the show and all of your gifsets of course! Anyway I really don't care about him being too old..I like that he came back for them and I also like that he was in the original and how he said it meant a lot to him to revisit them. Obviously I'm a little biased lol and I do agree with you technically but not a problem for me when watching a show. I think I saw someone say they walked out of the Outsiders cuz the character looked way too old and that was the stupidest thing ever lol. They were all older in the movie too, same with Moulin Rouge, so not a big deal. I could agree with Aaron being old just because they had younger people play that part in comparison but if he still loves doing it, then that's great. He seems to be the favorite but I have not really seen any others to compare. I still hope you enjoy seeing the show though and he has a lot of energy that night and stage doors too! By the way, what's your opinion on an actor that doesn't stage door often or takes a lot of time off performing or misses a lot of shows? I don't really know what the standard is for this so I'm just curious..even if understudies are always appreciated!

So at least your reasons make sense for walking out of the show! I just hope it wasn't a show you really wanted to see. I've fallen asleep in a movie theater but not at a show. I think my sister might have fallen asleep for a song when we saw Hadestown but that was because she was tired, which makes sense. When I used to see shows with my mom, it definitely happened to her lol. I hope you don't get too tired in between or during shows or anything!!! But I've still never walked out of a show and don't think I would, except for your reasons cuz shows are expensive. I can't really say I've gone in a show completely blind. The only times I can think of was when I saw Head over Heels and The Color Purple. The Color Purple..I saw the movie but didn't know any songs except I'm Here. Head Over Heels I knew was a jukebox musical with Go Gos songs so I knew some of the music but knew nothing about plot. I'll have to ask my sister if she can think of more. Omg I still haven't seen Oklahoma either..not even the movie but I do technically know some stuff about it now lol. I'd say I'm familiar with most musicals so it would be hard to think of something I could be completely blind for but it seems like a fun thing to do..since I enjoy most musicals. But I guess I'm the same as you for Stereophonic and Oh Mary if that counts and I hope you enjoy CATS. I'd wanna know what that environment is like and with that kinda show. I've watched plenty of bootlegs not knowing anything though!

I am excited for the Outsiders tour and will be happy to see the show and staging. However this is the first time in a long time where I've loved the OBC of a show so much so it's hard to imagine the tour cast which I'm sure will still be great. I just think everybody is perfect in their roles and they all have amazing chemistry with each other that makes the show really believable so I'm sad I can't see them. I also have a bit of a crush on the lead haha and love his voice so much...the understudies do not compare lol. This is all very subjective though cuz I've seen people say they prefer the understudy more. I guess because he does not have a typical Broadway voice or he has a specific style of singing or quality to his voice which I personally love. Maybe I've just listened to the cast album too much then lol. But the show will still be great. They just announced Grant Gustin who is having a baby, replacement for Water For Elephants which is Kyle Selig from Mean Girls. I am interested in how he will sing in the role and this is also a show I've seen people say they like the understudy more or would prefer someone else in the role. I just wonder why that is..is it the style of music or type of show? I'm also nervous who they would get for Gatsby replacements too. It's just something interesting to think about. I will send more in part 2 before this gets too long!

hello friend!!! i am okay! how are you? happy concert week!! i'm so excited for you to go to your concert and i can't wait to hear about it! 🤍

i am also really bad at watching things! i'm currently watching interview with the vampire, which just got uploaded onto netflix, and a bunch of my friends absolutely love it so i'm really excited to get further into the series. i just finished episode one and i might be able to get through the entire first season before i go to new york, but knowing who i am as a person i think it's pretty unlikely. maybe someday i'll watch the proshot of b&c! who knows when though! they did change waitress being shown on PBS but i'm not sure why :( i hope you get to watch it sometime soon 🤍 and thank you for your kind words!! i've been having fun giffing again (although i haven't giffed in like three weeks now) :)

and haha that's so fair! i know a lot of people who aren't bothered by stuff like that but i definitely am! i don't think i'll be stage dooring any shows (which is fine) while i'm there! i used to stagedoor and i have such fond memories of stagedoor but this time i'm trying to see more friends and i'm already packing in so much theatre that any stagedoor time i have is rather limited :(

i have so many conflicting thoughts about stagedoor. i think it could be lovely! it could be so great for people to connect with actors, but i think it often leads to boundaries being crossed — as many lovely, positive, kind stories i've heard at stagedoor, i've also heard of people stalking actors, or harassing them. i would never fault someone for not stagedooring, especially given the current wave of covid. but also, stagedoor isn't in their job description! and after a long day i'm sure many of them just want to get home! i think that taking time off work is also something everyone's entitled to and it's not always our business to know why — it could be illness, it could be personal stuff, it could be anything. i do think that when an actor is calling out constantly though and it's a poorly kept secret that he's out partying then that's different 😭

and no! the shows were the wizard of oz (which i do love dearly) and cats haha. here's a secret: i almost fell asleep the first time i saw hadestown (first preview on broadway). which i do think was because of sheer exhaustion (red eye flight where i did not sleep much) but... you know! i'll be sure to give you a cunty cats review <3333

i hope the outsiders tours near you/tours to a place that's convenient for you to get to and also during a date you can make it!! and i saw that about kyle selig!! i have a soft spot for kyle; i loved him in october sky & pippin (for the like three weeks he was in it) and mean girls obviously. and sometimes understudy performances just click better with people! my friend just saw water for elephants and said it was fun, but not great so i think it's just the show 😭 but that's okay! i will see you in part two!

[disneyanddisneyships]

@gyubby99 okay this came to me randomly. I'm not sorry.

"Loreley where are you taking me?" Alistar asked as he was lead through the forest by his friend.

"I had an idea and i called in a favor. You'd better be fucking grateful because my dad is getting sick of me asking to bring back the dead," loreley explained.

"You already let me see my mother again. What more could i even ask for?" Alistar stated.

"A way to stand up to your father maybe," loreley replied.

Alistar stopped walking and just stared at her.

"Look, he won't be able to touch you or anything, but my father said it'd be good for his eternal suffering. And you need a shitload of closure. I already got the go ahead from eve and Rosalyn," loreley explained.

Alistar nodded before he started walking again.

When the two of them made it to the lake where this stuff usually happened Alistar gulped.

"Its okay Al. I'm just gonna be a few feet away," Loreley stated before the lake turned blood red. "I'll leave you to it," she muttered before walking away.

Alistar stood up straighter, his face was stone and his eyes were dark.

The outline of his father came into view, the red tones and shadows making it scarier than it should've been.

"Hello Father," Alistar stated coldly as he stared, not letting his emotions get to him.

"Ah. The disappointment," John replied as his ghost bathed in red looked around. "To what do i owe the displeasure?" He asked.

"The only displeasure here is the fact that I have to see your face again," Alistar answered.

"Be careful son. Wouldn't wanna end up like your mother. Dead and alone," John warned.

"And what does that make you? Dead, alone, and unloved?" Alistar shot back

"Careful," John warned again.

"Or what? You'll kill me? A bit late for that. Because you see I'm up here living the best life I could be, while you will be living out your eternal suffering down there, being reminded everyday of what an awful person you were," Alistar stated.

John made a move to hit his son, but his fist went straight through him like a ghost going through a wall.

"You dont have anymore power here. You are weak. For once in your righteous life you have no power over anyone. You have no power over me. It's over, John," Alistar spoke.

"How dare you! I am a king! I am your father, and I control you, you selfish, spoiled little-"

"YOU CONTROL NOTHING!" Alistar shouted.

"You dont control who I marry. You don't control how I feel. You don't control how I look. And you certainly don't control who i love," alistar started. "I am done living up to your expectations. I am done trying to prove myself. And I am done being your son. I hate you. I've always hated you. And the only reason I never told you that was because-"

"You think I care?!" John yelled.

"DONT INTURRUPT ME," Alistar shouted angrily.

John's eyes widened in shock.

"You have no idea, do you? The pain and suffering you inflicted onto me? All the scars I have because of you? You never loved me. You've never loved anyone but yourself! You spent your life calling me selfish but it's You! You are the problem in this world!" Alistar shouted.

"And yet you still married ella-"

"I didn't! I married for love! And i have two beautiful kids who will never know who you are. I have a family. And I am something you will never be," Alistar explained.

"And what's that?" John scoffed.

"Loved. I am loved. And that's something you will never be. Not by your parents, not by my mother, and certainly not by me," Alistar stated, his eyes burning with anger.

"You're useless," John replied.

"And yet I'm the one who's alive. Not you," Alistar retorted.

"Youll never be a man," John insulted.

"And you'll never be in power. Goodbye John. I hope you rot in hell," Alistar hissed.

And just like that, the red tint of his father's shadow, along with his father, dissapeared.

Alistar let out the breath he didn't know he was holding.

"Kinda wish I could've seen you punch him," Loreley stated as she came back.

"Me too. Come on. Let's go back home," Alistar replied as he and loreley walked back to Ella's castle.

Back at the castle, Alistar's family was waiting for him.

"Well?" Ella asked.

Alistar smiled as tears filled his eyes.

"I've never had the courage to do that until now. Thank you," Alistar stated.

And that's when his family hugged him, tighter than anything.

He had a family. Finally.

He made something of himself.

He was the most fortunate man on the island because of that.