#I know my weskers a lil off

[dantefreakdaaaa]

Me waiting for Wesker writers to write smut that is loving and tender and is like Wesker almost cares about you:

[happy74827]

Conflicted, Yet Certain

[Albert Wesker x Agent!Female!Reader]

Synopsis: Tension rises when you refuse to do what Wesker orders. The result? Well, it's nothing short of explosive {GIF Creds: @monsieurphantom}.

WC: 2611

Category: Spice/Lime, Insane Amount of Sexual Tension {TW: Choking, Slamming into Trees (lmao), Wesker being a lil bitch}.

I’m going to be so real with all of you rn. I’m not a complete stranger to Resident Evil; I know some things (most all relating to Leon and Ethan 😏), but in terms of Wesker… yeah, I dunno THAT much. I did lots and lots of Google research solely because I discovered him through an edit (I’m also aware of the Separate Ways DLC, too, don’t worry), and he’s cool asf. So, bada boom, this oneshot was born.

And I don’t want to toot my own horn, but I think I pretty much nailed him. Personality-wise, that is. And @yoursacredqueenmother, don’t you come for me. You knew this was going to happen.

So, with that out of the way, enjoy this fic that I spent way too much time on :)

『••✎••』

It was like a gush of wind. One minute, you were staring into the dark abyss of his shades, free to move, and the next, you were against a tree with a firm hand gripping your neck. No matter how many times you were reminded of his inhuman strength, it always caught you off guard.

"I asked you a question,"

Wesker was standing so close that your bodies were almost touching, his grip tightening every second that passed without a response. His free hand moved from his side to rest on the knife on his hip. Your eyes moved down to the weapon, and he let out a low, almost guttural, chuckle.

"What, are you afraid?"

He pressed the blade against your cheek. The cold steel made your skin burn, and you winced as it cut into your skin. He held it there, watching you struggle. You didn’t try to push him away or escape the pain, but you didn’t give him the answer he was looking for, either.

You looked up at him stiffly and gave him a look that was equal parts hate and disgust. He was always playing these games, pushing you, taunting you, testing you. You knew he wanted you to react, to show him that he had any effect on you.

He removed the knife from your face, and you exhaled a breath you didn’t know you were holding. Wesker didn't remove his hand from your neck, though. Instead, he ran his glove-covered fingers across your cheek, wiping away the blood from the small cut he caused.

"I expected better of you," He paused, and you felt his nails dig into your skin, "And, more importantly, I expected my orders to be followed."

Your heart skipped a beat as you heard the unspoken threat in his words. You couldn’t stop the shudder that went through your body, and the scariest thing about the whole situation was that you weren’t sure if it was fear or arousal.

His grip on your neck loosened, and you relaxed, letting your head fall forward slightly. You knew that, at this point, Wesker was just waiting for an answer, and you had nothing left to lose by giving it to him.

"I won't do it."

"Excuse me?"

He tightened his grip on your neck and lifted your head up to look him in the eye. Your heart raced, and you could feel the adrenaline pumping through your veins.

"I won't do it. You can't make me."

Wesker scoffed and took a step back, letting go of you completely. You took a deep breath and watched him intently, waiting for him to strike again.

He didn’t, surprisingly. He just stood there, looking at you. It was a real pain how he could see right through you, and all you had were his damn glasses.

"You can't make me," You repeated. It was shocking how much confidence you had in that statement, especially given that Wesker could break you in half if he wanted to, but despite everything, you were defiant.

He tilted his head, his lips curved into a smirk. His posture was casual, and, while you were still tense, his attitude was the complete opposite of what it was a few minutes ago.

"I think you'll find that I can."

There was no trace of the threatening, sadistic man you were so used to dealing with. Instead, he was calm, almost charming, but it didn't change the fact that you didn't trust him for a second.

He took a step towards you and then another. Before you could move, his hand was on the back of your neck, pulling you closer.

"You will do as I say because if you don't," He paused and leaned in, his lips brushing against your ear. "Chris will be the one who has to deal with your mistakes."

It was a low blow, and, as much as you wanted to tell him to go fuck himself, you knew he was right. There was no way you were going to put Chris in any kind of danger. Not now. Not ever.

Wesker chuckled. The sound was dark and full of amusement. He was enjoying the power he had over you, and you hated it.

"You'll do what I say, won't you?"

You didn't reply, but it didn't matter. You were both aware that he was right. He knew that, no matter what, you would follow his orders. He knew that if it came down to it, you would give up everything for the sake of protecting Chris.

You felt Wesker's hands loosen, and he stepped away, putting some distance between the two of you. He seemed pleased with your decision, his smirk growing wider as he watched you.

"Now, go and prove yourself useful, my dear," Wesker commanded, the amusement gone from his voice.

He turned his back to you and began to walk away, but you couldn’t leave it like that. You couldn't just stand there and watch him leave.

You rushed forward and grabbed his arm, an act that he fully expected and allowed but not one that was welcome. He spun around and grabbed your wrist, twisting it painfully. If he weren’t so precise in his movements, he would have broken it.

You didn’t bother tugging or fighting his grip. You just stood there and stared up at him, waiting for him to say something.

He didn't. Instead, he just looked down at you. It was a different kind of stare. Not one that was filled with amusement or anger but curiosity. He was curious about what you were doing. He was curious about what kind of game you were trying to play.

"I'm not afraid of you."

Wesker raised an eyebrow. You could almost hear the sarcasm in his voice when he spoke.

"Oh, I'm well aware."

He released your wrist, his touch lingering longer than necessary. You flexed your fingers and rubbed at the spot where he grabbed you, trying to ease the ache.

You weren't afraid of him, but that didn't mean that you weren't intimidated by him. It didn't mean that you weren't cautious. After all, he was stronger and faster than you, and his control was unmatched.

"Why don't you go run along to Redfield now, Agent," Wesker said, his tone almost teasing, "I'm sure he'll be delighted to hear of your obedience."

You didn't wait around to listen to any more of his taunts. Something took over, something that made you do something really, really stupid.

You walked straight up to him, no words spoken, no thoughts shared, just pure, unadulterated instinct. Inches away from him, you pushed yourself up onto the tips of your toes and smacked your palm against his cheek.

His head snapped to the side, his eyes most likely wide, and his mouth slightly parted. The slap didn't hurt, or at least, it didn't affect him physically, but it was enough to shock him. He didn't expect that.

He turned his gaze back to you, his jaw clenching and his fists balled up. His shoulders tensed, and you could see the annoyance written all over his face.

"Do it again."

Stern and cold, his voice was low and full of warning. A part of you told you to walk away, to get out of there while you still had the chance, but the other part of you refused.

Your hands trembled slightly, but you didn't back down. You’ve been holding it in for so long, so agonizingly long, and this was your chance to do something, to let go, even if it was just for a second.

For once, you didn't care about the consequences, or the punishment, or the fact that, at that moment, Wesker could very well kill you.

You slapped him again. Tried to, anyway. He was too fast, and before your hand could reach his face, he grabbed your wrist again. He pulled you forward, twisting your arm behind your back, and held you against him.

His other hand was on the back of your head, forcing it up so that you were looking him straight in the eyes. Except, again, you couldn’t. Not with those fucking sunglasses in the way.

He leaned down, his lips only a few inches from yours. You could feel his breath on your skin, warm and heavy, and it sent a shiver down your spine.

"Do it."

This time, there was no malice or mockery in his voice. No, he wasn't telling you to hit him. He was giving you permission.

Your heart was racing, and your legs felt weak. It was so much, and you weren't sure how much more you could take. You hated him, God, did you hate him.

But, at the same time, there was something about him that drew you in. Something that made your pulse quicken, and your stomach churn. Something that made your head spin and your palms sweat. Something that made you want him, even if you didn't want to admit it.

And, as much as you hated him, as much as you loathed him, you couldn't help but want him.

He was a monster. He was evil. He was everything you had spent years fighting against, but there was no denying the attraction you felt towards him.

The heat of his body was overwhelming, and the smell of him, a mix of leather and gunpowder, was intoxicating. His grip on your hair tightened, forcing you closer, and you were sure he could hear the way your breathing hitched.

"Come on, dear," He taunted, that mocking, sinister tone back in his voice, "Don’t tell me you're losing your nerve."

That was it. That was all it took. You didn’t know what came over you, but suddenly, your hand was on the back of his neck, and you were crashing your lips against his.

It was messy and rough, and there was so much anger, hate, and lust behind it. Wesker returned the kiss, his lips moving against yours, and he let go of your hair and the arm he had pinned behind your back.

His hands moved to your waist, gripping tightly, and you grabbed a fistful of his hair. He let out a low growl deep in his throat and pushed you backward.

The next thing you knew, your back was once again thrown against the nearest tree. It wasn’t as painful this time, mostly due to the adrenaline coursing through your veins and Wesker taking the initiative to move his arm to the back of your neck to soften the impact.

The bark was rough against your skin, and the scent of pine was strong, but none of it mattered. Not with the way his hands found your thighs, lifting them up to wrap around his waist.

Not with the way his teeth bit and nipped at your bottom lip, drawing blood. Not with the way his tongue soothed the wounds, tasting the coppery fluid.

Not with the way his hips rolled against yours, drawing out a moan from the back of your throat.

Wesker pulled away and trailed kisses along your jaw, moving to the side of your neck. You gasped and bucked your hips as his teeth scraped against the sensitive flesh.

He chuckled, the vibration of his voice against your skin making your head spin, and moved his hand from the back of your neck to hold the sides of your face.

He was so close. You could feel the heat radiating off of him, the warmth of his body contrasting the cool air around you.

You wanted to reach up and rip those fucking sunglasses off his face to finally see what was hidden behind them. You wanted to look him in the eyes, to see what kind of expression was on his face.

You wanted to know if he felt the same way you did, the same fire, the same desire.

You wanted to know if he hated you as much as you hated him.

Instead, you ran your fingers through his hair, grabbing and tugging at it, causing him to growl against your neck. His lips were still on your skin, sucking and biting at the delicate flesh, and his hands were exploring every inch of you.

His hands roamed, and you closed your eyes, savoring the sensation of his touch. Your head was clouded with desire, and you could barely focus.

It was all happening so fast. Too fast. Your body was on fire, and, for a moment, you forgot who you were with and what he had done. You forgot the pain and the suffering and the lives that had been lost.

You forgot it all, and, just for a moment, it felt good. It felt right. It felt like you were meant to be together in every way.

Wesker was no fool, and he certainly didn't miss the change in your breathing or the way your muscles relaxed under his touch. He could hear your heartbeat, the rhythmic thumping growing quicker and louder as his hands moved lower, and he could smell the scent of arousal in the air.

He pulled away and looked down at you, the corner of his lips twisted into a smug smirk. He could see the look in your eyes, the haze that was covering them. He could feel the heat of your skin and the way it prickled under his touch.

He knew what you were thinking and what you were feeling, and he could use it to his advantage.

"So, this is how to get through to you," He mused, his voice low and teasing, "Interesting."

And just like that, reality set back in.

Your eyes snapped open, and, as if you were being electrocuted, your body went rigid. Wesker took a step back and released you from his grasp, watching intently as you fell to the ground.

Your body was numb, and your head was spinning. You couldn't move, couldn't speak. You were frozen, unable to do anything but watch him.

"Well, well," He started, his eyes never leaving you, "Perhaps I was wrong about you."

He took another step back, putting more distance between the two of you. You looked up at him, your breath coming out in short, ragged gasps.

He tilted his head, his face showing a mixture of amusement and annoyance, and took another step back.

"Send my regards to Chris, won't you?"

Then, he was gone. Just like that, he disappeared, and you were left alone in the woods, struggling to understand what had just happened.

What had you done?

You didn't know, and, to be honest, you weren't sure you wanted to. All you knew was that you had fucked up big time.

You had let your guard down and shown him a weakness. You had given him the perfect opportunity to use you, and use you he did.

You stood there, your mind racing and your body aching. Your legs were weak, and your heart was pounding, and it took a while for your breathing to return to normal.

Goddamn it, what had you done?!

The question haunted you, and it continued to haunt you as you stumbled back towards the main street, where your car was parked.

You were completely and utterly fucked, and you had nobody to blame but yourself.

You got into your car and turned the ignition, the engine rumbling to life. You shifted into drive and pulled away; the only thing on your mind was how badly you needed a drink.

Or two.

Or three.

Damn it… What the hell had you done?

[weskie]

O Captain, My Captain! (Albert Wesker x gn!Reader)

18+ | 2100 words, dubcon, gunpoint blow job, sex fantasies, gender neutral reader, wesker being a little shit but somehow still a lil soft | Fic Directory

original request

You always were his favorite.  So smart and perceptive, sharp and witty.  Of course you would be the one to find him first.  It almost pained him to devastate you in such a way.  To see the way your face fell when those words left his mouth.

“I’ve always been with Umbrella.”

The way you whispered his title in disbelief when he pointed his gun at you was… perplexing.  He figured you’d have one of your usual wise-cracks to chuck at him.  Instead you–

“I trusted you, I–” You quiver, staring down the barrel that could spell your undoing in a mere flash. Your eyes dart back and forth between him and the tank containing the Tyrant.  “Please don’t kill me…” 

Beautiful, isn’t it?  Wesker thinks to himself.  He wonders what you must think of his good work.  What you must think of everything.  

Deep down, he doesn’t want to do this. In fact, it had been his plan to grab you before death could take you in some twisted form or another.  You were the only one he wasn’t keen to place in this experiment.  He fully intended to run off with you in his arms, play the hero, whisk you away to safety and maybe finally allow some of his affections free to make an attempt at something more.  You weren’t supposed to find him.

You’ve certainly dashed his plans.  So what now?  

“I’ll do anything!”

Of that, he’s certain.  Most people staring down the barrel of a gun would say the same.  Perhaps…

Now that’s a thought.

“Anything?”  He asks with a cock of his head.  “And just what could you do for me, my dear?”  The corner of his mouth twitches in a small smirk as the term of endearment hits you.  He saunters forward, handgun still trained on you.  Little do you know he’d clicked the safety on before raising it toward you to begin with.

It’s precious how you shiver under his gaze.  Like you know exactly what he’s thinking, or you’re at least partly aware of it.  

This situation has obviously ruined his plans to pursue you once the dust had settled.  Perhaps he should take what he can get now while he’s got the opportunity.  Sure there’s terror in your eyes, but he’s seen the way you looked at him before.  The glint in your gaze, the pining glances and shy smiles.  Wesker was no fool.

But he is an opportunist.

“I don’t kno–”

“Oh, but I think you do.” He purrs, pressing the muzzle under your chin to force you to look right into his eyes.  He glides his thumb across your lower lip, tongue peaking out to wet his own.  “Ah, ah… Don’t squirm.  You wouldn’t want my finger to slip, would you?”  It isn’t even on the trigger.  He smiles sweetly as you take a breath to still yourself.  “That’s it, sweetheart.  Very good.”

You’re adorable like this.  Eyes wide, lower lip quivering beneath the pad of his thumb.  Wesker leans forward until his lips are next to your ear.

“I want you on your knees, my dear.  Think of it like a new training exercise– just you and me.”  His breaths fan against the shell of your ear, words shocking your eyes even wider.  He can hear you gulp in anticipation before you start to descend.  “Show your Captain what you can do, hm?” The sight alone has him twitching in his pants.  He’d never admit to the overflowing excitement in watching you kneel before him, knowing full well he was about to have you in a way he’s only dreamt of.  God, the thoughts he’s had of you– the way he’s come apart at mere fantasies all because of you…

His breath stutters as you work him free from his pants, halting entirely when you grasp his cock and stroke.  He can feel the tremble in your grip, so he smooths his free hand through your hair to coax you to relax.  He nudges you forward gently. 

He knows you can’t see his eyes behind the lenses of his glasses, but he almost wishes you could.  If you could only see the exhilaration in his eyes coupled with the lack of genuine hostility, maybe you wouldn’t be so afraid of the gun in his right hand.  Maybe you’d know it was all for show to keep you from getting any bright ideas.  And fuck, he could’ve dropped the damned thing the second your tongue grazed the underside of his tip.  It’s been so long since he’s been touched by another; he never has the time to even consider it with his double-triple-agent life. It’s almost embarrassing how sensitive he is to the warm wetness of your tongue.

But he needs more.

His fingers curl in your hair to pull you nearer– his signal for you to open wide and take him. He releases a shuddering breath when your lips wrap around him, descending nice and slow.  The sensation of you sucking him is simply beyond words, completely and utterly tantalizing in the way it combines with the hot drag of your tongue.

A soft moan works past his lips when that pesky gag reflex of yours makes your throat clamp deliciously around him.  He doesn’t let you pull off.  He can’t drop the facade quite yet– can’t be too gentle lest you get any stupid ideas.

“Ah, ah… Hold it.”  He breathes, fingers gripping tighter in your hair, pushing your head down.  “That’s it, dear…”  For all of your sputtering below, you manage to resist the need to release him by the time he finally jerks you back.  

He gives you a minute to gasp desperately before pressing the gun to your temple. Your eyes flutter open as if you'd forgotten the lingering threat.  Your pupils are blown and the way you squirm is all too obvious.

He knew you'd like this. 

Somewhere, deep past that layer of fear, there was a part of you so aroused by this that you couldn’t help but let it affect you.  Maybe, with his cock down your throat, you realized that this was what you’d always wanted too.  That all those sweet little looks you’d hide when he’d turn your way weren’t for nothing.  That your lust for your Captain was coming to fruition in an unorthodox way that was still just as delicious as whatever sinful thoughts you’ve kept of him all this time.

“I'm impressed. But you can do better for me, can’t you?”  Wesker’s eyes roll when you dive back in of your own accord, suckling and swirling the tip in a way that screams more than mere survival instinct.  It takes no time at all for him to give in and start with slow thrusts into your mouth.  Paired with the way he controls the bobbing of your head makes it truly like heaven itself.  Wesker could damn well forget everything– where he was, all that had happened, even the Tyrant mere feet away meant nothing right now.  Your little gags and chokes around his shaft ring like music to his ears, drowning out the hum of machinery preserving his subject, echoing in his mind to wash away every scream he’s heard since this mission began.

There’s just this.

Just you and him.

“That’s– mmh, that’s it!”  Wesker’s breaths grow heavier by the second and he presses the muzzle harder to your temple, wordlessly demanding that you keep up with those wicked glides of your tongue, keep swallowing his cock, keep fucking taking him.

His mask begins to slip with every weakening moan that was never meant to make it past his lips until finally– fucking finally– he holsters that damned gun and grips your head with his other hand, hips rolling until that familiar tightening sensation grows and grows and your name chokes breathlessly from his lips.  With one last sharp thrust, Wesker buries himself to the base, hands pulling your face flush to his groin as he paints your throat with his release.  His thighs quake and he can just barely register your hands grasping to still him.

He tries so hard to be quiet and maintain that perfect decorum of his, but it’s useless to try.  Not when he’s balls deep in your mouth, not when he knows he’s claimed you from the inside out.  He’s thought of this too many times.  Of how he’d have loved to have you on your knees under his desk back in his office.  You’d suck him just as sweetly as you’ve done now, one hand stroking the base of his cock while the other smooths up and down his leg.  He’d let you get him close– so fucking close. He’d let you get him right on the brink of losing himself and then kick away in his swivel chair and fuck you senseless on the desk.  He wouldn’t even care if the rest of the team could hear the sweet sounds you sing for him.  He’d fill you over and over again until his come leaks from you.  He’d kneel down and eat you clean just so he could fill you all over again.

Every fantasy flashes in his mind as the throbbing bliss tapers away.  This absolutely cannot be the last time he has you.  

It won’t be.

Wesker pulls out slowly, staring down intently to watch every inch slip free.  His thumbs wipe away at your tear tracks before kneeling to your level.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?”  He asks as if he hadn’t just put you in an impossible situation and made you think your only way out was to let him fuck your mouth.  He smiles at you, though, try as he might, he can’t quite manage that same wicked smirk he’d given you earlier.  The facade has faded, and he’s back to the same old Captain Wesker who used to hide his smiles at your quips.  The same one who now feels the tiniest pang of guilt at how spooked and used you look.

There's one last thing he needs from this moment. He couldn't possibly let it pass him by knowing he may never have the chance again. And, if he's lucky, you'll understand every unspoken word. 

Wesker leans forward, hands cupping your face to bring you into a kiss that was far from the depravity he'd shown you mere moments ago. Your squeak of shock is swallowed by him, and it's the perfect opportunity to wiggle his tongue into your mouth and explore to his heart's content– pleased to no end when you reciprocate.

“You've always been,” he pants between wet pecks to your lips, “my favorite of the bunch.”  One of your arms loops around his neck, and that’s when it hits him.

Cold steel presses beneath his jaw and he smiles against you, proud beyond measure that you'd pulled one over on him so easily. 

“Still trust me?”  He asks.

“Should I?”  You counter, panting softly against him.  He can see the way doubt blends with belief.  You’re the picture perfect specimen of indecision and he would just love to see your reaction to this…

“Go on.  Pull.”  Wesker murmurs. “Trust your Captain.”

When you make not even so much as a twitch to flinch from what you’d expect to be an exceptionally loud mess, he grasps your hand, finger creeping over yours to direct it onto the trigger.

How peculiar that, much like he’d done, you hadn’t even put it on there.

You look at him with wide eyes for the hundredth time since you found him, suddenly looking much more terrified than when he’d first aimed it at you.

“Wesker, I–”

Click.

You flinch for nothing, and Wesker simply gives you a smug grin as he watches you realize you were never truly in danger.  You run through a variety of emotions.  Anger, betrayal, disbelief, acceptance… 

“What's wrong, my dear?”  Wesker purrs, taking your chin between his thumb and forefinger.  “You didn’t think I’d actually kill you, did you?”

The look on your face elicits a deep, amused chuckle. 

“Foolish.  I suppose you’ll need to be made to understand just how deep my appreciation for you goes, hm?”  With his free hand, he removes his gun from your grasp before pushing you slowly onto your back.  Your chest heaves in anticipation, though you lack that deer-in-the-headlights look from earlier.

Good.

Wesker removes his glasses, placing them on your head to rest against your hair.

“Remember,” he whispers, leaning down to nibble at the side of your neck. “Trust your Captain.”

[hamartia-grander]

Alrighty here’s mah lil ranty rant (But long, many apologies I dunno how I could shorten it)

Let’s start with Ada bc mommy- I mean mommy- I mean- (/j)

Ada Wong:

-So I see a lot of people trash Ada for the fact her personality seems to be more cold. She has distant she’s cruel (although she still seems to have lines she won’t cross, like with Wesker and the Las Plagas sample). I see people complain about that but I would like to make a hot take, here: it’s actually better. She’s a mercenary. She’s a gun for hire- her job has to be cold because she could be betraying her friends at any given second. In the older games, she was sort of just… I don’t know… A bit too human for the job, and the role in the story that she is meant to fill. I see people describing her as a Bella, and honestly, I strongly disagree. In fact, I would argue that the original was more of a Bella then the remakes. This is because all she was really there is for the generic “Ooh look pretty woman, bad ass eye candy” trope. I’m not saying that she didn’t have any depth as a character- I’m just saying that the remake gave her much more credit as a character, and made her much more interesting.

all right, moving onto the old man. (#1 Wesker hater over here I’m sorry I’m not sorry lol)

Albert Wesker:

-I know that I hate this guy, but even I have to appreciate that out of quite a few of the Weskers that have been made, this version is just better written. I see people complain that he is too angry and honestly, I disagree. The fact that he has a hidden anger, makes sense from a character perspective. And he’s getting increasingly more cheesed off at Spencer for obvious reasons. No wonder he’s pissed. Personally, I think the fact that they’re showing that he has emotions- he’s just learned to control them- is honestly much more compelling. I still hate the guy, but I can see where he’s coming from- in a twisted and a messed up way.

yeah. That’s it l. that’s all I got for him. I don’t really like him that much so he doesn’t deserve a whole essay like Ada imo. (Still like his character, though he’s very interesting.)

that’s my rant. Thanks for hearing me out -> I know this was ridiculously long. That’s why I asked permission first. I basically just wrote an entire essay in your asks and I am so sorry lmao

hjadsg no need to apologise. I may have to contest you for #1 wesker hater tho,,, 👀 I hate his guts too

BUT you're absolutely right the DLC added so much depth to their characters. and personally made wesker MORE hate-able to me personally because we just further see how messed up he is, to the point where even Ada - who has had to numb herself to the details of the job to survive - had visible negative reactions to his genocidal nonsense. I loved Lily's performance in the base game but she especially got to shine in the DLC, she absolutely nailed the cold look with emotion hidden underneath. Ada's cold exterior is her armour against her own emotions, she can't take a second to feel as that could be the second she dies, she doesn't have the luxury of emotional vulnerability; even though she does feel, she does care, she cannot afford to let herself. And little things like eye movements, lip twitches, subtle body language, and her inflections were all techniques Lily used to portray that tumultuous relationship between Ada and her feelings, and Lily did fucking amazing at it. Best Ada performance ever. Ada's never been allowed that depth before because she's always had to be palatable to the male audience :) so I'm glad she's finally getting it. And Wesker finally feels like a real villain, rather than just another power hungry white guy (which, he very much is, but now there's depth to it lol). Wesker's dialogue in the DLC is scary, and it makes the audience more aware of what exactly he believes and what his motives are. This DLC added so much to the base game that really drives it as my favourite RE game.

[ellipsiseffervescent]

so i made a chart on my headcannons for how i think the resi characters would identify their sexualities. it's not totally comprehensive of all sexualities, of course, and i left romantic flags off for space reasons. i also put a clean version of the chart for your own hyperinterest fandom needs (maybe type words instead of spending an hour on circles like me idk) obligatory: this is a silly lil opinion, not analysis

some quick thoughts on my hcs:

some bisexuals in this category choose this label because it’s just what theyre used to (wesker, billy coen), others because they think it sounds sexier than pansexual (carlos)

however, I think excella would identify as bi for illogical terf reasons

OG re4 ashley is homophobic. 4 remake ashley is a sweet asexual lesbian who supports her best friends, two guys fucking (leon and luis)

only sherry uses the word “pansexual” for herself, everyone else gives generalized “gender doesn’t matter to me” answers (except leon, who blushes but won’t say anything)

jill goes back and forth on how to define herself but she’s not too concerned with picking a label. if she likes you, you’ll know, otherwise don’t worry about it

helena is asexual, aromantic, and tired of the allosexual shenanigans of re6

maybe barry had a gay experience in the military, but if so it's essentially a repressed memory. he fought w his daughter moira when she first came out for what were certainly unrelated reasons, but now he's a proud ally to his queer child.

ethan and heisenburg absolutely had homoerotic tension but it only went one way. ik theres a lot of fanwork for gay ethan but i get nothing queer from that guy sorry

mia's conservative coded to me in a way i can't quite explain. like i think she would have kicked her daughter out of the house for being queer

Here's the clean chart:

[thepinksteve]

Leon S. Kennedy Head Canons

THIS IS NOT FOR LEON FROM RE 2 ORIGINAL AND REMAKE. THIS IS FOR THE DBD VERSION OF DBD ! IF IT WAS FOR THE GAMES , IT WOULD BE VERY DIFFERENT

Entering the realm -- When Leon entered the realm , he was just happy he wasn't in Raccoon City anymore , only to meet a new enemy , Nemesis. His jaw was completely dropped when he first met the monster. Jill just hit his arm in a joking way as they watched Chris getting morried. Leon took off his badge for a week and stopped talking to Jill , Chris , and Claire for a month.

Leon also lost his shit when he met Wesker , then watching Chris get morried again. Leon proceeded to chuck his badge at Wesker , flip off Jill , and blow up on Rebecca.

“ He yelled at me.. Why ? I don't even know , something about knowing Wesker and it's my fault he's here. I don't know. Also, that was literally the first time we talked , ever. ” - Rebecca Chambers , 1 - 3 , 15 : 28 / 3 : 28 . Recorded by Zarina Kassir

Leon was forced by the Entity to do trials with the others , but only because he was so freaked out by them , it caused emotions and the Entity wanted that. She also didn't allow Leon to see Ada for a month , just to make sure he really missed her so that when she finally did show her. He would be extremely happy.

When he saw Birkin , he almost gave up. Him and Claire both gave up for a bit. Claire deciding to play along with the Entity's game after a week. Leon , took a month.

Relationships -- Leon tries his best not to romantically involved with anyone , including Ada. He tries to not see her as much as the Entity wants , she wants the emotions from the two , but to make sure she couldn't feed off of them. He avoids her at all costs.

Leon made a bunch of friends , only because he was from a famous video game franchise. The only ones who are his friends that don't know him from Resident Evil are David Tapp and Bill OverBeck. They are one , from different universes and two , they are sweet lil old men.

The other old men of the fog , don't care for the rookie. Such as Ace Visconti. Ace cares for no one expect MONEY !

Nemesis and Wesker -- The moment he saw Nemesis , was the moment he knew he was absolutely fucked. After he had calmed down from Nemesis , he met Wesker. They sat down and chatted , Wesker said something and Leon now refuses to go into trails with Wesker.

After Sable joined the realm , she was able to translate the beast , she asked Leon to sit down with Nemesis. The stars obsessed monster said something. Leon refuses to state what he said. He also refuses to go into trials with Nemesis.

Feng Min -- Leon was unlucky enough to meet Feng in his first official trial to the Entity's sick game. Leon is the only person who was allowed to stop having trials with Feng because of the traumatic event she caused him. Leon went into a panic attack for three hours , probably more if the Entity didn't take him out of the trail.

Feng Min started with saying how she was a huge fan and such , she then pulled out a fan fiction she made. He didn't get past the title. It was named “ Leon has a unexpected night with Mr X. ” Leon balled up and started crying and shaking.

Feng Min , after three months. Was finally allowed to be in trials with Leon again. She immediately got banned again after she showed him another fan fiction. He was able to get past the title this time , being told that it had nothing to do with him. It did , and Birkin.

Leon knows what the fans make about him -- The Entity shows Leon what fans of him say , make , and do with his character. She likes the reaction she gets out of him.

Continue the blood line -- Leon has refused trials with Chris but refused by the Entity , her already granting no trials with Feng Min. Although , the Entity did allow less trials.

Whenever Leon does get a trial with Chris , he gets told. “ Continue the blood line Kennedy. ” Leon doesn't understand what it means , and it scares him.

[thetentaclecommander]

The Sacrifice of Devils

TSoD (part 3 of the Devil's Saga)

((Header Pic for the series done by Lil-Chilo)) The Sacrifice of Devils Rated M; has adult/heavy themes Fandom: Resident Evil Main Ship: Nemesis/Jill Valentine Side Ships: Chris Redfield/Sheva Alomar Chapters: 12/12

CW: graphic depictions of violence, psychological trauma, implied medical torture, implied/referenced torture, major character death (full tag list on AO3) Summary: "But already my desire and my will were being turned like a wheel, all at one speed, by the Love which moves the sun and the other stars."

The third arc in the Devil's Saga.

Based off of Dante's Paradiso: reflecting reality and the backlash of the real world.

An AU fic set 8 years after the events of RE5 and 7 after Teaching and Slumber. After the events of Teaching, Jill decided to leave the soldier's life, not just for her sanity but for the unexpected result of her misjudgment with Nemesis.

But cracks are below the surface - intentions, especially in Chris' case, are not completely clear, and Sia...isn't always as cute as her smile. And do not forget, that shadows from the past have a way of resurfacing...one way or another.

One such shadow will return - with a vengeance.

This fic will explore darker themes and topics: it will basically not shy away from nor sugarcoat the violent or suggestive situations within. Events from pre-mansion, RE1, 3, and 5 will be revisited (or taken liberty with). ________________________________________________ Excerpt from TSoD: Prologue-

Why? Was it desperation? Was it desire? Was it loneliness? A last ditch effort to control him? Love?  No. No? …I … I…don't know.

Her trust in humankind was shattered. Day in day out seeing people fight for little things; power, money, war. Things that brought out the worst in people, changed people destroyed them pushed them into man-made monsters. She saw it break apart good men like Chris, and saw it change those that already held evil inside into things beyond hellish.  The years of torment with Wesker broke what little faith and trust she had left. The nightmares still come but rarely now; they mix with dreams, dreams of an event that should have never been. The result of that stared back at her with innocent blue eyes years after.  As she sat years ago with a test in her hands, the unpleasant thought of what to do ran through her mind numerous times. She was reaching 30 at the time; she discarded the idea of a family when she joined the BSAA and then after breaking it off with Chris found that to be another dream to be put aside. But it sat in her palm reading in no uncertain terms proof of pregnancy. Something that never occurred, no never seemed a possible option on the table.  He who never had the option to be human, nor the comprehension to do the crimes of a man – but as all abominations of Umbrella was at one point created or cloned from one – still had the desires of one. She wanted to berate herself for her foolish moment of action, acting on such base motives…but in truth how could she? It wasn't forced, wasn't taken…she freely gave and he responded in kind. No…it was more she told him to, manipulated him using him for her own fucked way to grieve. But was that wrong? Wrong to have a creature made for the express purpose to kill, to destroy to be used for that? Was it wrong to have command over such power? To have that power lay hapless under her? Wrong to desire such power between her legs? Wrong to not expect the same comfort from a human? A deeply hidden feeling rose from within, this feeling she hid from the others, this feeling she had kept to herself as the years passed and her life started anew.  It wasn't all about her anymore. (Continue reading the prologue of The Sacrifice of Devils on A03)

[manufactoredxbyxdesign]

♢ Has anyone ever tried to steal your blog? Your headcanons? Icons? All that jazz

[Not here or HUNK or Alex as far as I know.

I think because HUNK and Alex are pretty rare as it is it'd be hard not to notice it, and Wesker is a character that has a lot of widely accepted interpretations that really don't belong to a single mun.

I'm not breaking any new ground in saying he's a cold, calculating, selfish person who always proitizes himself. That's pretty much what is on the tin when it comes to his depiction in the series.

In the places where I feel like I've deviated I think it's so distinct it would be too obvious if someone attempted to use those ideas. For example his Post-Fog verse is very much imo unique from what I've seen suggested for Wesker so I'm not worried.

As for my graphics? lol well if they take them I'd be a lil thrown off cause the Caard is a free template and my promo is as well. LOL]

[radellama]

Resi Reviews pt2

Continuing with last year’s resi post, I’m gonna be talking about these games babeyyyy! I didn’t get to play much (and honestly I inhaled so much last year that even I’m surprised looking back…god I love this series) Like last time, I’m gonna get into it and although I’ll try not to spoil too much, expect some mild spoilers. Let's go!

Code Veronica X

This game is goofy and charming and I had such a great time with it. I found it at a decent price online for ps2 and bought it, and man this makes me want to get the older games on ps1 so baddd. There was just something about playing it with the controller and hearing my lil old ps2 whirring as I played that really immersed me; as much as I love emulation, there definitely is a ‘click’ when you play older games on older consoles. That said, lets get into it.

I hear a lot of debate about whether this was meant to be the ‘actual’ re3 or not, and there’s plenty for and against, but in my heart I’m taking this as the continuation to re2 lol. You follow Claire as she continues her investigations into where her brother disappeared to, when she’s caught and sent to an umbrella facility on Rockfort Island. All hell breaks loose as the virus spreads across the island, and Claire has to make her way out before it’s too late. Along the way, she meets a nasaly Canadian teen named Steve, whom she bumps into a couple of times before they decide to team up and get off the island together. They eventually end up in Antarctica, and if you couldn’t tell just by the locations alone, this game is a lil whacky. The main antagonists are the Ashford twins, and they’re a little strange, though enjoyable. I found myself laughing at the sheer absurdity of some of the cutscenes, and spoiler alert, you come across Wesker!!! I was so so so excited, he’s blonde, he’s skinny, he’s rich, and he’s a little bit of a bitch. (Honestly, that goes for the Ashfords as well :P)

While the plot is anywhere but down to earth, it was fun to follow and still felt like a resi game. While Steve was silly, I didn’t find him all that annoying, so a particular scene that happens near the end of the game regarding him succeeded in making me quite emotional. It was awesome to see the Redfield siblings together again, the set designs were honestly pretty rad and the music is very memorable.

I noticed a few things during my playthrough that were pretty cool. As this is an older resi game, it has all those door loading screens. They’re really slow and I got a bit impatient at times, but when you were heading in the right direction and it was ramping up to something like a boss fight getting triggered in the next room, the controller would rumble as though it were Claire’s heartbeat. This really excited me and added some more tension, and as it was only on occasion it was pretty fun! Another thing is that because these environments are 3D and not prerendered, there is motion in the (not so) static cam!! I know it's really simple but with subtle and smooth tilts and pans across some of the larger spaces, it made the areas feel so dynamic. It also reduced the need for so many camera angles as it could just move slightly to show more, so I never really found myself getting disoriented. Admittedly, it did take me a while to get used to the tank controls, as the only games that still have them are re0/re1make, and they’ve been refined, but once I figured out how to use my weapons properly, tank controls were pretty fun tbh. It makes me curious to play the ogs, and I’m definitely keen to try figure out a way to play them next year!

One thing I noticed that wasn’t as positive though, as this is an older game there are some spots where you can soft lock yourself in a corner or fuck yourself over with tedious insta kills. I remember the boss fight on the plane, I somehow fucked myself over entirely on that and was lucky to be able to brute force my way through it. There were some sections near the end that had me redoing the same sequence of events over and over because of an insta kill up ahead that was difficult to navigate. The worst of them all for me was the fact that Chris and Claire share item boxes - this makes sense and is pretty neat on it’s own, but this means if I wanted Chris to use a particular weapon or he was holding onto some healing that I really needed, I couldn’t access them unless I was willing to put them in the box and finish his sections without them if I wanted Claire to have them. There were some sections that I utterly fucked myself over with, and I because there’s no indicators of when the swaps are about to happen, how the hell was I supposed to know lol?? It’s obviously not that big a deal, as I did manage to finish it, but hmmm reeks of the bad side of this side of gaming…

Overall, despite some things that didn’t age well, in both story and gameplay, I had so much fucking fun with this and am looking forward to my inevitable replay. I know that I’ll beat my ridiculous time that was 50+ hours cause I forgot to turn my playstation off and left it running overnight a couple of times lmao

Lachrymal / I Love You https://youtu.be/8Yo1DAxPflo / https://youtu.be/nsrOHuGUipU

A Moment of Relief https://youtu.be/mxq5ymqPAsQ

Suspended Doll https://youtu.be/0CFBV424a7A

~~

Re6

Wow, what a mess of a game… I’m sure anyone who knows of this game knows about the messy development schedule and how it kinda messed up everything (there's a good youtube video on it actually https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_uV6vCrBNY ) so I’ll spare that speil and just say: oh my god why do we need this many cooks.

This game is different to previous ones, in that there are campaign modes that have different but interwoven stories. The plot takes place over the span of about six months, though not every campaign takes up the whole six. The first one is of Leon and Helena, this is the closest to resi formula (think re4/5) - the second is Chris and Piers, which felt more like cod than resi - the third was Jake and Sherry, this one was surprisingly nice, kind of like a mix between the vibes in Leon and Chris’ campaigns - and the last one is Ada’s campaign, which aims to tie up all the loose ends. What loose ends, I honestly couldn’t tell you, because the plot was so strange and convoluted that I could barely follow, even after playing through every campaign myself and watching a few lore recaps. It's that bad. (I just watched another two lore recaps for this review just to make sure and man, I still don’t know what’s going on…)

In all honesty, this game is my least favorite so far. The soundtrack isn’t all that memorable, I found the gameplay to be ass and I didn’t know what was going on even as I was playing. Things just happened, and it often felt like plot points were competing with themselves on what could be more shocking instead of figuring out if anything made sense first. It’s clear that some hubris and the assumption that the name ‘resident evil’ would make it sell well, which sucks.

As I mentioned in my re5 review, 5 took so long for me to get into it, the start dragged on and it was only when the stupid plot stuff was stripped away and my main man Wesker started to reveal his plan for TOTAL GLOBAL SATURATION that I was really getting into it. Here for re6, I don’t think I even really had a moment where I could get behind anything. And I was trying, ok? I wanted to follow along and see whats going on, but everything was so ass that the most fun I had was making Leon trip over dead bodies and making everyone either do the tit-punch-of-life or a really homoerotic giving-of-the-tic-tac when I had dangerously low health. This review is going to be so long and vague cause that’s how the game felt, but to try stick to some kind of structure, I think I’ll just try to quickly recap each campaign and chuck out a few points I liked, and bitch about the things I couldn’t stand.

To start with, Leon and Helena’s campaign. This one tried to follow the more familiar resi formulas, with game pieces feeling similar to the Raccoon City outbreak and the whole gameplay path of ‘battle bioweapons, then they get increasingly more dangerous as you get deeper into it. Literally, cause you’re going underground into the pits of bioweapon hell.’ The familiarity of it was nice… I guess. I can’t commit to saying that it was nice, because honestly it was all stuff I’ve seen before, and it was done better in the other games! I did enjoy seeing Leon in his prime dilf-age, looking tired and miserable in his early middle-age, and I like that even though he’s clearly so jaded, there’s little flashes of that rookie cop who just wants to help despite it all. Helena was… fine. I just felt weird that she’s not familiar at all and it took way too long to figure out who she was and how she related to Leon. There’s a cathedral that you go to near the start of their campaign, and although the puzzles were a bit of a slog, I enjoyed the slower pace and having to work through it to open a secret underground. Leon’s campaign had some of the best music as well, two of the three song recs I’m doing are from his lol. This was probably the most straightforward of all the campaigns plot-wise, but it was still confusing, despite having it’s moments. I honestly think the most fun I had with this campaign was finding out Leon can trip over stuff and figuring out how to roll around on the floor. (I took a screenshot of his ass while he was crawling and then he looked back into the camera and now thats my playstation home screen :P) Overall…. Decent, but nothing original was good and nothing familiar was fun unfortunately.

The next campaign is Chris and Piers’. I have quite a few problems with this one tbh, mainly cause they did Chris so dirty. I don’t know what it is with resi developers absolutely fucking him over in some way but bruh. I think I understand him more intimately than you developers ever could and I am deeply upset at the blatant shoving aside of his trauma and ptsd when it could’ve been a really interesting development through the campaign and for his character. While I just complained about Helena being a new character and finding it hard to relate to her and all, Piers was a little easier for me. And no, its not purely cause he’s a cutie and I like his scarf thingy, it’s more because we got to see him in flashbacks and stuff working with Chris so we see HOW their relationship worked in more context than we got with Helena. Piers was good to have as a companion character, (I actually played him instead of Chris lmao) but my one major gripe with him was… why on earth did you pressure Chris into going back into the field when you can see he’s clearly in need of a real holiday where he’s not an alcoholic amnesiac. HE NEEDED HELP! WHY ARE YOU PUSHING HIM TO REMEMBER IN THE MOST TRAUMATIC WAY POSSIBLE???? Because their plot was sorta simple and most of their gameplay felt like a cod rip-off, I was kinda bored for most the playthrough. This campaign reminded me why I never really played gun games growing up lol. However.. To end this chunk on a better note, the final boss looked cool af even though it was weird, and the um. Very spoliery plot point regarding Piers in the boss fight was fun, it was just a shame that all these kinds of fights (where you’re fighting a giant creature of some kind) really dragged out. And iirc correctly I think that I had a similar situation to the Wesker fight in re5 where the finishing blow is one you have to initiate with a qte so I kept fighting way longer than I had to cause I was trying to deliver the final blow myself… I might be wrong on that but. Hmmmm

The Jake and Sherry plot was interesting. It had a lot of silly stuff going on, and a lot of the pacing was janky or dragged out, but I enjoyed them. I was so enamoured seeing Sherry all grown up, and that she still loves Leon and Claire for helping her out of RC, she’s just such a cutie! While she feels like a retread of Leon’s naive-rookie routine, she has enough of her own uniqueness that I genuinely enjoyed her for most of this. Jake on the other hand, while I didn’t hate him, it did take a while for me to come around. In all honesty, I think it was just hard for me to imagine him being Wesker’s illegitimate son… I for one love to sexualise Wesker cause I think it is the ultimate form of entertainment, however I cannot fathom him canonically doing acts that result in a child……. Sir he is like a ken doll down there his only attraction is to power, he gives the same lack of sex vibes that light yagami does. Regardless, Jake has some serious daddy issues, and although I actually really liked the scenes where he and Sherry got to talk a bit, especially as they meet up after being experimented on, it felt weird and sudden that Jake had such strong and swaying feelings about Wesker. It felt artificial, like it’s only written that way to make more drama or something, not to actually develop Jake as a character. By the end, I’m glad to see how far Jake did come as a character, both from going through all this hell and finding out so much about his father and the bioweapon world, and from working with Sherry and learning about how much hell she’s been through as well. In this aspect, I think the Jake/Sherry campaign was my favourite, as the plot felt the nicest and this was The Unique Story for this game; not Leon’s way too familiar and contrived plot, and not Chris’ shooty gun one. If this campaign was fleshed out better, and had competent writers, I feel it would’ve been nice to focus on these guys for the plot of the game, and have the rest of the campaigns be delegated into quick side stories or bonus things like the Ada campaigns in re4.

Then there’s Ada… I really liked just playing single player as a single person again, this forced two player means that you have shitty ai partners if you have no friends (like me :c). Honestly, I found these guys worse than Sheva in re5 - I don't know how that happens, but Ada being alone was a fresh breath. Up till this point, there were so many plot points that didn’t make sense and hadn’t been fully resolved yet, and I was hoping that Ada’s campaign would clear things up, but it didn’t really. I don’t know if it was a net zero on things cleared up or if I had more questions than answers after completing. I don’t have much more to add that I haven’t already said so. Lol Ada’s a cutie.

Overall, this game was so clunky, and I don’t just mean plot wise. The UI was fucking awful and it changed slightly with every campaign. A strange scrabble wheel to select weapons is not helpful, and coloured lights that don’t fucking mean anything to me is annoying as hell. I know I can’t compare it to the more modern games like re2make where I just loved the ui, but bro this was abysmal. There was also no map, you just click a button and it points to where you’re supposed to go, and to me it made the already linear and railroaded maps feel moreso. This game just sucks lol, I might play it again just to play the other characters in each campaign, but its not really worth it. I can tell you a massive part I won’t look forward to in replays is all the shitty qte, they’re ugly af and feel like massive fuck-you’s to the pacing and intensity of the gameplay. Re4 got it right and made them enhance the experience (although they didn’t need to be there, they were a nice addition imo) re5’s were… less good, but they tried I guess, and here in re6… god I hate them so much.

Oh and one last thing, one of the best parts of resi games is finding lore files across the environment and reading it IN THAT ENVIRONMENT. That doesn’t happen here. Instead there are these annoying blue medallions that you have to destroy and that unlocks lore files in an arcade cabinet screen outside of the game. Its shit. Re5 did this a bit, but it had a blend of some in game files and then BSAA documents to read from the menu outside the game. Why would they just get rid of everything and have all the lore files in a menu outside the game!! They’re not even interesting to read, and half the charm is coming across them in context! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Mercenaries Results Screen https://youtu.be/OR36QJnCS5E

Back for More https://youtu.be/mZ2SsWKls0A

Through the Fatal Gas https://youtu.be/9FiV9JF69Tw

~~

RE7

This game is the soft reboot the series desperately needed. This was the game that originally piqued my interest in the series due to it being VR compatible. No, I did not play in VR, but I had a lot of fun regardless. I think I’d like to try playing it in VR and see how it changes the experience, as I noticed that the fov was really narrow and everything felt right on top of my nose and way too close in a not so fun way. This honestly gave me a bit of trouble with navigating the space, as it affected my in-game spatial awareness - though I’m also not willing to hold that against this game, as I haven’t really played many first person games like this, at least not recently. Overall though, once I kind of got a feel for it all, I had a pretty good time.

Being first person, the player is meant to assume a more projective role onto our protag, Ethan Winters. He’s simple, he’s boring, he has some of the worst one liners in response to the shit that goes on around him - I LOVE IT. I have a few things to say about the whole Ethan thing, but I think I’ll save it for the re8 chunk. The game’s premise is that you’ve lost your wife, Mia, and haven’t heard from her until just recently, where she gives her location. Ethan rushes over to Dulvey, Louisiana, where he comes across the Baker estate, and encounters all the mouldy horrors that await him. You have to make your way through the Baker family, while the estranged daughter Zoe tries to help you through the trials on the property until you can finally escape.

All in all, I liked this one and it was the scariest by far. I got pretty spooked on my fist few playthroughs of re1/2make, but here in 7 there were times where I ended up pacing around the room before I realised it and had to play in much smaller chunks than I usually do. I ended up watching a playthrough alongside my own, not to spoil myself but just to see that someone else made it through in a similar way that I did lmao. Just mad props all round for bringing horror back, and realising that the true horror was Americans all along.

While the Baker family as bosses were fairly unique, and the plotline with Eveline was interesting for the most part, the enemy designs were really bland tbh. The first couple of times you see a moulded, its gross as fuck and a good spook, but then as you get further into the game and keep seeing the same moulded enemies, it really wears thin. It felt like there were only two or three variants on the mould design, with only a couple of other little unique things to fight - that gets really really boring really really quickly. I thought we had all learnt by now that the more you see the mysterious scary monster, the less scary and more goofy it gets…

There also wasn’t that many puzzles tbh, but after how abysmal 6 was I was so happy to see anything that vaguely resembled a puzzle in this game lol. Instead, my main gripe is with Mia, and the weird shit that happens at the end. It’s hard to talk about without completely spoiling the game, but there was a lot that just didn’t gel with me, and seemed to follow the classic ‘everything unravels into madness’ towards the end.’ Despite that, I enjoyed it a lot, and even though there are other resi games I’d rather replay more than this one, I think I’ll enjoy coming back to it on occasion.

I also gotta squeeze in a quick appreciation for the tapes, I thought they were so clever and a great way to add tension in a unique manner. Great reboot and I highly recommend playing or watching a playthrough if this game catches your fancy, I don’t think you’ll be too disappointed.

Saferoom https://youtu.be/lvsxfgABQss

Main Menu https://youtu.be/I9T-1VMzcNI

Go Tell Aunt Rhody https://youtu.be/IHwnNbJkXNw

~~

RE8

Whew, what a game. I was excited for this one to come out, and it was super fun to play it while it was fairly new. I say fairly, cause although I wanted very much to play it as soon as I got home from the shops, I unfortunately am an adult with things that take up my time so I couldn’t neglect all responsibility and play immediately. The three times I’ve played this already have more than made up for that. I had so much fucking fun with this game, that even though I have very real grievances with it, I’m willing to look past them a litlle cause I just had that good a time with it. I even streamed a playthrough on twitch, which was super fun, and I’m interested in replaying a few other resi games while I’m still in my uni holidays too.

You reprise your role of Ethan Winters, with significantly more spunk. Ethan’s been relocated to Europe now that he’s been reunited with his wife, and they had little baby Rosemary. The game starts up with their domestic stuff as you do the night routine and put Rose to bed, but just when you’re about to sit down to eat, Mia gets shot. A full on raid of the house as Chris Redfielf himself refuses to communicate and takes away Ethan’s baby right in front of him. The van he was placed in was destroyed, leaving him abandoned in the middle of a Winter-y nowhere, and he comes across the village. It’s here that you learn that Mother Miranda and the four lords have stolen your baby, and it’s up to you to get her back. Like!? That’s fucking awesome!

I mentioned something I wanted to talk about in regards to Ethan in the re7 section, and that would be the whole ‘projection onto protagonist.’ I know that it was a huge thing back in the 90s/00s, but I don’t think you can really get away with those kinds of games unless you have a custom character (even then, I’d still argue that). In RPGs with silent protags, even someone like Link from LoZ, they’re silent and were intended for the player to project onto them so that they feel part of the world and journey. I don’t think that can really happen though, as even silent protags can have quite strong personalities, which can break that ‘immersion.’ Ethan was intended to have this level of projection, however his personality in 7 was so boring and strange that pretty much everyone felt taken out of it. Also, if you want us as players to project onto him, why is he saying one-liners? Shouldn’t we have the option to choose what one liners we say, if we are truly meant to be ‘the protag?’ I think that the developers took that kind of criticism that was floating around from 7 and really fleshed out Ethan more in 8, and I appreciate that so much. Cause the fact is, I’m not Ethan Winters, but I sure as hell wanna make sure he gets his baby back. I appreciated that he felt much more like a person, and it honestly made some of his weird comebacks and dialogue feel better because they weren’t trying to go ‘oh but its you lol.’ The one thing that does bother me about Ethan here though, is the fucking lengths they go to to hide his face. I get it, he’s not supposed to be the star, but HE IS. Having distractingly obvious things such as drapes over mirrors, mirrors that are plain dirty or blacked out ect was silly in all the environments. I’d be willing to roll my eyes and get over it if we could’ve seen his face in the final cutscene, as the impact would’ve hit so much better if we could’ve seen his expression at the end of the game. Fuck man, I love this boring little dude, and these small and weird choices make it a massive roadblock for people to like him, which is clearly the opposite of what the devs were intending.

Back to the meat of the game - the four lords were all unique, both in their ‘realms’ and final battles, though it was clear that some were given way more attention than others. Lady D is obviously the fan favourite, her castle is super reminiscent of the spencer mansion from re1, and it was so fun exploring through it. I know I’m almost infamous for how cranky I get with modern stuff sometimes, and it feels like sometimes I’m the only one with these ‘outdated’ opinions, but this game got so much right. The attention to detail was so apparent in the castle, though I will say I loved stock sound effect #3 for the breaking vase sound.

Donna Beneviento is the next lord, and her house was really nice tbh, though I think it would’ve had a greater impact if she was at least swapped with Morau, as her schtick was that you were stripped of all your weapons and had to make it out alive. That kind of thing was effective, but not utilised well as it was so early in the game. If you’re going to strip me of my weapons and make me feel vulnerable, do it when I’ve gotten so reliant on them that it gives me a hard slap to the face to have them removed. However, I liked this, despite how short it was. It was fun playing hide and seek with da baby, and I liked the psychological attacks, I just wish she was given more… I feel she really fell flat and I flew through her section, especially after how grand Lady D’s place was, which was unfortunate. I would’ve liked to know more and spend more time with Beneviento, but alas…

Next is Morau, and he was just gross tbh lol. He was kinda sad and pathetic, which could elicit sympathy in some, but I was a bit more ehhh on this part. I remember exploring the village and having fun going ‘this feels like re4!’ but when I got to Morau’s boss fight I remember turning to my roommate and going ‘eugh, this feels like re6.” It was still unique and interesting, and ultimately it was more enjoyable than actual re6 boss arenas, so whatever.

The last lord, and my personal favourite, is Hiesenburg. He and Lady D had such a raw charisma that was so enthralling to watch, the actors did such an amazing job bringing these guys to life. Heisenburg’s battle theme was also one of my favourites, however his battle was one of my least favourites (can’t decide if I like it more or less than the Morau one…) I was saving my magnum ammo just for you ya manwhore, why did you have to turn into the kaiju mecha thing… Based on his powers with metal telekinesis, I thought I was going to have to get creative, but nah. Launch shit at his face with a scrappy handmade tank lol. At least the music was super banging. His factory was interesting, however it didn’t really feel like a resi location at times. There were some parts that felt like the science facility in 4 and the caves in 5, and while I enjoyed it immensely, it did feel just a little adjacent.

All in all, I loved going through the village, and all of the lords on the whole were super fun. I’ve had so much fun replaying that even though the story kinda falls flat for me, its a rare case of me enjoying it anyway. My gripes lay mainly with the main villain and Chris. Chris was done dirty yet again, and I’d like to formally request that capcom put him on the shelf or something until they figure out what they’d actually like to do with him before they destroy him even more. If looking like the saddest not-my-roderick in re7 wasn't enough, although he’s a smoking dilf here, he is so piss poor at communicating and makes some of the worst decisions ever that it frustrates me to no end. He really expected Ethan to just butt out of all of this, when from his pov this whole mess started with Chris raiding the house, murdering his wife in front of him and stealing his baby. There’s even a lore file (fuck yeah lore file!) that states that Ethan’s gone through military training at Chris’ request - how the fuck do you have this man who survived the Baker incident on his own with only the inherent gun knowledge that all Americans have, and whom you’ve now put through training, to just sit aside and be a civilian. He’s not a fucking civvy, he’s more tied up in this than you want to think, Chris, and it’d actually work more in your favour to let him fucking help and just support him. This is why Piers should’ve picked Chris up and sent him straight to rehab so he can work through his mental health and sober up. With the way things were going with the main antagonist, Mother Miranda, I thought that they were going to reveal that she has shapeshifted into being Chris to frighten and confuse Ethan.

Lets talk about Miranda, actually. She has the power to change her form, and she rules over this village like a religious figure, and her motivation is based on almost a century-long grief. It’s simple enough, but I felt that honestly it was a bit too simple in a plain way, especially compared with the kinds of backstories the four lords had. I liked Ethan standing up to her to fight for his baby back, and her many forms in the final fight were grotesque and fucking beautiful, but she felt like such a weak antagonist imo.

The worst offence for me though, is the way they tried to tie it all into the greater resi lore. There are lore files at the end that link her with the Eveline stuff from re7, that's fine and dandy, and I expected it would be closely linked with 7 since it shares protags. But there is this one file that completely retcons her into being the reason why umbrella exists. IT PISSES ME OFF SO FUCKING MUCH. I know this is just a video game and I shouldn’t care this much, but I do. It's bad, if you’re going to retcon it and make it that sloppy and ‘oh actually, she’s the reason lol’ then. Can you at least make her fucking origin story and motive stronger?

Sighhh…. I think I need to replay if I want to get any deeper into it cause it has been a few months now since I’ve played, but there are really big gripes I have with this game that pain me. Putting them aside though, this has been one of my favourite installments in the series. The fov and feeling like things were on the tip of my nose I brought up in 7 didn’t feel like that here, I don’t know if thats due to 7 being VR compatible and just meant to be played inside the helmet, or if they fixed up those kinds of things and really refined it here. Either way, I enjoy it, and my last pissy moment will be to say that the map was a bit eughhh, if you zoomed in or out too far it changed what kinds of thing you could see on the map, and it was really fucking annoying. I liked the whole hand drawn map aesthetic, but after being spoilt with how lovely the map was in re2r… bruh moment. One thing I really did love tho was that Ethan keep a dairy and draws little pictures for it and I think that’s awesome.

Highly, highly recommend playing, even if you haven’t played much resi before this, as its such a genuinely fun experience all around despite little things, and when you feel like you’ve got a grip over all the controls, boy does it feel good to play.

Yearning for Dark Shadows https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wpp_1J2jyjs

The Final Movement (Hiesy battle fuck yeah!) https://youtu.be/c7opH26BQio

Soundtrack Trailer https://youtu.be/bDVcgOaVyqw

~~

To close - I really love this series, and clearly have some strong opinions on them. I've really enjoyed playing this year, even though there were some parts that were slogs. I've almost completed my collection, only the two revelation games left :'( I will be sad to have played through my collection, and looking forward to playing more of the older games in some form or other. I have also been considering doing reviews of the movies, as I am a film student and all, and I've already seen most of them. I'll see if I can polish off the rest of them for next year, but for now, thanks for reading and look forward to more ramblings in the next instalment :P

[ashiemochi]

Hello hello!! How are you doing today? Hope work isn't too hard on you <3

Chapter 53 was!!! So good!!! (I mean besides the fact that I wanted to fight frederic for the whole chapter djsjsj I loved it) like just the beginning first I'm actually surprised that George survived c'mon!!! Give up already!!! And that part where he finds so ah and her spine get back into place on its own is oddly fascinating 😭 at least she's alive <3 tho when he threw her bracelet away 😠 why did he see it uh 😠

And then when she wakes up!! Poor bub it must be so confusing (frederic must be so happy that she's having an anxiety attack lol) and I LOVE top secret files 👀 and btw I thought that so ah was infected like way back when she was a kid but she was 18?? Or is frederic lying again?? (man I don't even know anymore he's lying too much for his own good) just the fact that he's saying he used the enhancer to encourage her bloodstream bc her body was refusing the medicines......... yeah we're buying it yeah.........

Same for the part where she comes to umbrella with her parents, like you're gonna tell me that no one noticed her, no one was watching over and of course she fainted right next to a sample 😭 (but maybe it's just me being too wary lmao)

The fact that he's not talking about los illuminados and how he covered everything with anaemia 👀 can't be more sus than that 👀 and then he goes like "leon and chris are against us they're the bad guys" mehhh I beg to differ!!! I actually laughed when so ah talked about the files chris found bc I was thinking "he's gonna make her believe that they invented everything blah blah" and frederic was like "they're trying to get to you" heyyy 😭 and I hate SO MUCH how he's taking advantage of how she'd do anything for her family omg I wanna punch him so bad??? "We're family" my ass if he is . And it's so obvious now (not for so ah but rather for us) how he's talking to the parasite inside her like it's so creepy and disgusting .

Btw I wonder if her parents are actually still alive........ but I'm pretty sure he's using them over her so that she's gonna comply to anything he asks :// And that part where so ah actually stops to think about leon :( this is so sad bc he actually thinks she's dead :( (and I'm so glad so ah still has her dagger with her bc ya know if by any means she decided to stab frederic 👀 I wouldn't be the one to complain 👀)

And the way he's putting all the blame on Ada for the outbreak!!! It's sooo funny like he's such a great actor tbh bc lying like that?? And saying that she wants the virus to sell it then when he wants to do the same?? Which makes me think back, I wonder who's frederic's supervisor?? At first I kinda thought that it would be wesker and that Ada was sent to retrieve so ah but it doesn't really makes sense since he put the blame on her. That whole thing makes me really curious??

AND CHRIS AND PIERS <333 I truly really do hope that so ah is gonna give them that requested authorization omg 😭 come on do it you know you don't trust frederic he's weird af 😭

I'm absolutely excited for chapter 54 omg you have no idea, I can't wait for tomorrow's update!!!

hiii!! I'm doing great, hope your day/night is greater tho! <3 I'm close to getting my 2 weeks off so work is fine so far!!

I was actually a bit nervous to post the chapter because I thought it was boring and just Eeghhhhhhhhhhhh gib leonn!!!!!! so I'm very happy you enjoyed it! 😭

The explanation is true to some extent 👀 minus the things he did actually hide like project pansy and using anaemia as an excuse. So Ah was born w shit immune system so she was always sick, yada yada, till she was ten when frederic came into the picture. now he WAS a good guy, like yk, actually wanting to save her and he was working on the enhancer before cuz yk, he was working with umbrella.

he injected the enhancer as a lil test since he just assumed she was a goner and basically went on with his gut feeling but she got better and that was it. he was ECSTATIC but didn't expect the tremors so he was like "ya girl got no blood, whoops" to hide it. The negligence was unintentional as the parents were constantly looking for a permanent cure and that's why so ah felt alone so Frederic swooped in to be the "father figure" whilst lowkey experimenting on her and getting her to lean on him and him only.

she got infected around eighteen and he + researchers did end up making an early stage of the vaccine but it wasn't permanent so frederic injected her with the enhancer that had hints of the g virus itself and the rest is explained in the chapter--

Project pansy should be explained in the next chapter tho along with frederic's true nature👀 and that would be the last "lil backstory moment" for a good while <3

consider tomorrow's chapter an early Christmas present because i ADORED writing it and ya'll deserve it for all the support!! Like seriously I'm 2 followers away from 100!! It's insane! I love you all sm!! 💕

all I can say about tomorrow's chapter is "ABOUT TIME FOR GOD'S SAKE"👀

link to fic!💕

[ariana-senpai]

Top 10 Hottest Characters for July

Ayyyy, we back at it again. In no particular order:

Donquixote Doflamingo (One Piece)

My lizard brain sees a mf that’s 10 feet tall and there’s really nothing I can do. It just takes over. Bastard man.

Kakashi Hatake (Naruto)

Honestly, is there anyone that watched Naruto that doesn’t want to smash Kakashi? I mean, how could you not?

Zant (Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess)

When he’s holding Midna and his mask comes up a little and he goes, “I need you” with that whisper? I felt some thangs.

Ectoplasm (My Hero Academia)

He can make clones and I think that’s very sexy of him. Also that voice. Also also, he likes karaoke. So there’s a cute bae underneath the badass.

Sheogorath (The Elder Scrolls franchise)

The style. The grace. The sheer drip off this man is insane. He’s a lil crazy, but we stan the Prince of Madness.

Vayne Solidor (Final Fantasy XII)

When y’all were playing this game, did you just wanna run your hands through his hair? Because I certainly did.

Freaky Fred (Courage the Cowardly Dog)

The rhyming does some things for me. Like a creepy ass Dr. Seuss.

Renji Abarai (Bleach)

I’d jump off that widow’s peak and be damn pleased about it. When he came on screen it was immediate, “WHOMST?!”

Albert Wesker (Resident Evil franchise)

This sadistic bastard is so hot, it physically hurts. You know that, “smash me you strong mother fucker” meme? It fits.

Leonard Burns (Fire Force)

If you look up silver fox, you’ll see Leonard in the description. He big, he thique, he’s kind of an asshole and I feel that.

[soltansea]

lil’ red

“Ada… It’s been far too long.”

It was the voice she hated more than any other. She turned her head, elegant red dress fluttering in the night air, to look at him. “Simmons.” Her distaste was audible under her signature playful veneer, not that he ever cared; her knuckles were white against the balcony railing. “Looks like you got my message.” 

He smirked and walked towards her, then rested one hand on the railing and the other at the small of her back, looking out over the city. “Hong Kong. An excellent choice.”

“I know about Project Ada,” she said without taking her eyes off the skyline. His hand tensed. “Aren’t you glad you came alone? Wouldn’t want anyone listening in on this.” He let go of her, then, to mutter a code word into his watch, and she huffed. “Oh, how you love to point snipers at me. Just us, now?”

“Alone at last… Who told you?” His voice was steady over the wind, but she knew she was running the show now.

“You know I have my ways of getting information. No matter how many copies you try to make, I’ll always be the best at it.”

He hummed. “You and your games, Ms. Wong. We’re so alike, don’t you think?”

She gave a noncommittal sound. “Too bad you disgust me.”

“Oh, come on.” His hand was back, at her waist now. His mouth was a few inches from her ear as he spoke. She breathed slowly in and out through her nose. “Don’t tell me you’re getting soft. What am I supposed to do when you tell me you’re leaving? At least I know I can’t live without you… you don’t seem to have figured it out yet.”

She rolled her eyes. One more minute, to get his security detail clear and scramble the GPS signal from that watch. “If that’s ignorance, I’m happy to be a fool.” 

“Always playing so hard to get, my dear Ada.” She could feel him grin. “But now that you’re back, I have no need for the project. Isn’t that just like fate?”

“Who says I’m back?”

He chuckled. “You can’t bring yourself to accept the fact that we’re made for each other, can you? And yet… this lovely hotel room you’ve rented for us seems to contradict that. Had I one guess, I’d say as hard as you try, you just can’t resist me. You’ve missed this.”

“You’re delusional, Simmons.” Her stance was perfectly still, her voice measured.

“Am I? I don’t think so. I think everything about this is just… perfect. Pieces falling into place. You don’t like my little pet project, I’ll call it off the moment you agree to come back to Washington with me. Otherwise… I’ll have no choice, will I? You’re mine, and I need to have you. And your problems… some gambit you played with Wesker, if memory serves.” Her expression twitched into a frown. How did he know that? “He’s a dangerous man, Ada, but the Family will protect you from him. I’ll protect you. All you have to do is come back to me. Perfect.”

“Tempting,” she replied, unamused. The nickel-sized chip on her thigh holster chirped; if she looked down at the hand on her waist she would see that the screen of his watch had gone dark. “But I think I’ll kill you instead.”

In a flash, she had flipped him over her shoulder and pressed a knife to his neck, one knee down on the cold concrete of the balcony. He cursed. “Ada… You’re being irrational. You’re better than this... Acting out isn’t like you.” So convinced of his power, even with beads of blood forming on the serrated edge of her blade. “You know you’ll be making this up to me for a while.”

“You’ll find you don’t know nearly as much about me as you think you do, Simmons,” she said calmly. “This is the end of the line.”

“I know everything about you,” he growled. “I made you what you are. If you’re the best, it’s because of me. I own you.”

A smile played across her lips. “No, Derek, it’s in spite of you.” She pressed the knife deeper into his skin, a narrow stream of blood running down the blade and onto her hand. “I think you can give me more fear than that, though. I want you shaking before I end you. I want you as scared as all those women.”

“Ada— Don’t be stupid. Wesker will find you. He’ll kill you. You can’t do anything to stop him, but I can, I’m the only one who can keep you safe. Listen to me.” He was losing his bravado now, all but begging. “You’ll be nothing without me, bitch. You need me.”

“I’ll take my chances.” She was holding his upper back off the floor against her thigh in a firm headlock. Swiftly, she positioned his desperately fumbling hand on the floor beside his shoulder, where she could press a stiletto heel down into the center of his palm. He cried out, bones cracking, and she lifted him and leaned into it, pushing with impressive strength, until she felt the flesh give out under her heel and he screamed in pain. She grinned, grinding her heel against the floor. “Now, is there any chance you’ve injected yourself with a sample already? I’d love to kill you a few times over.”

“You little cunt!” he wailed. “I’ll kill you, you’re fucking dead, you whore! You’re nothing, you’re—“ His words devolved into a gurgling cry as she drew that serrated edge heavy across his neck, leaving a slit down to the bone, and his body went limp in her arms. 

She paused as if waiting for him to continue. “You haven’t? Well, that felt pretty good anyway.” She pulled her bloody heel out of his palm, and wrapped his intact hand around the handle of the knife. “Thanks for the knife, by the way. I thought you’d recognize it, I’ve always liked how it has your family crest on the handle. And all that foreplay left some nice hesitation marks, I doubt anyone will have reason to suspect any funny business. Things haven’t been going so well for you, have they? It’s a stressful job. There’s just that hand, but I don’t think they’ll give a little puncture wound much attention after such a long fall.” She got to her feet, hauling him up as his neck continued to dribble blood. “Will you listen to me? Crazy Ada, talking to dead perverts. I’d like to take a selfie for Leon, but there’s enough evidence I was here all over my dress. Okay, here we are.” She leaned him back against the railing, holding the knife in his hand. “You leaned back just like this, and…” She mimed him pulling the knife across his own neck. “Off you go. I can’t say anyone will miss you, Simmons.” 

With that, she released her grip on his shirt and hand simultaneously, and stepped back as he fell. The crunch that came a few thrilling moments later left a satisfied smile on her face, and she picked up her hook gun.

[rjshepherd]

Poldark Season 4 ep3

this season is only 8eps long i thought maybe the main plot would be here by now unless ive missed it. it just seems like a whole bunch of unrelated stories, which im not complaining about. or maybe theyre still just setting up?

still enjoying things so far, wish george would just simmer down for 5 minutes and that we could have some juicier plot nuggets but those are small complaints.

So, drake and Rosina making kissy faces. interesting. 

VERITY! I MISSED YOU BBY

Oh my god elizabeth is doing that face while she’s drinking again, I love it.

Monk adderly looks like a slytherin prefect who has a dark mark tattoo on his ankle or something.

Aww lil fat Caroline is so sweet

Oh, lady witworth sounds like a dick.

Oh, wow fuck monk adderly. Get out of my face he’s worse than George and that is saying A LOT.

Ross is an awkward pillock. Just say “Mel I missed u baby”

I stan Caroline now and forever.

Listen Ossie and his foot fetish disgust me but rowella is incredible. Like “all right I can’t do anything else ima let this goblin fuck me for some of his gold”

Does Ossie not know how to fucking knock doors or something

“to an outsider” oh damn there it is. And from Zacky of all people. I really didn’t think that zacky would be like this with ross.

Hmm I’m not sure how I feel about this drake Rosina thing but I’m glad Sam is talking like a normal person now. Hes much better when his every other word isn’t god. Hes acting like a human now and I dare say I might even like him.

Good, I’m glad ross and zacky are friends again.

OH, elizabeth is such a good mama and Geoffrey Charles is such a good brother to little val.

Poor wee drake not wanting to wish for morwenna and be selfish. just do it baby

Honestly, again, George would be up shit creek without a paddle nor a boat for that matter without elizabeth.

You know what I’m starting to see the Val/Jeremy/clowance resemblance.

Omg George is so tiny why is he so small he is totally a toy poodle

I love seeing ross with his friends just having fun.

Hey so what’s going on with Dwight and the baby. actually dont answer that.

Ok this party is boring and depressing. Except for GC who is def going to be an alcoholic.

God ross stop mentioning elizabeth you know it gets Demelza hackles up. At least he brings her a lil present for once. poor girl needs more pretty things. just more stuff in general she has like 3 dresses and 1 hair tie

Oh mY GOD NOT ON THE TABLE I BEG YOU.

Just throw the whole kitchen out its tainted.

Well that was pretty good. Will start the second disk (4,5,6) tomorrow but for now I’m satisfied. I still think elizabeth and Demelza do far too much for their stupid husbands although lord knows they need it. Honestly say what you want about sexism in these books and history in general, but we all know that 90% of Cornwall would be fucked over a picket fence if Demelza took the day off. Not to mention how absolutely pounded into the dirt George would be without Elizabeth. These 2 and Caroline are all that’s standing between Cornwall and the apocalypse. They made it clear that Mel was mostly behind Falmouth’s decision to put ross forward but just think about all the other small stuff that goes unnoticed. I understand too that George married elizabeth because he loved her, but you must admit he’d be lost without her in a figurative and literal sense.

I forgot to mention last ep but what was with elizabeth putting her laudanum thing in his drink? To calm him down. And why did he drink it? I’m pretty sure he saw her do it, does he know what it is? More to the point why hasn’t she done it before; he’s an excitable little poodle and he’s going to have a heart attack.

Anyway, I feel like I should go back and rewatch the other eps and do this again because it was fun. I’m still planning on doing a “ George Warleggan isn’t that bad and here’s why” like I did with wesker because it was SO much fun but ill maybe save all that for when iv officially watched all 5 series ( by which I mean watched them with my mom because she doesn’t know I've seen season 5 already lmao, shed kill me if she knew I watched it without her.)