#I know it's actually dumb as hell to stand on a ship's railing like that cuz it'd be so easy to fall off

[sanji-screenshots]

cool guy doing cool things.png

[blossom-hwa]

pirate!ateez |1|

So uh. this is what we get from the kingdom wonderland performance, watching too many wonderland stages as a result, and yelling to mai + javi?????? here we go I guess??? This is only half the members - the other half will be in a separate post later this week!

(credits to mai @wingkkun​ for the ideas that sparked san, mingi, and yeosang’s stories!)

Pairing: Ateez x gender neutral!reader

Word count: 8.7k (total)

Genre: some fluff, mostly angst, pirate!au

Triggers: cursing, blood, death (sometimes semi-graphic), like one implication of sex, implied physical abuse in one part - specific triggers for each section are listed below the headers!

Part 1 (Hongjoong, Seonghwa, Yunho, Yeosang) | Part 2 (San, Mingi, Wooyoung, Jongho)

Ateez Masterlist

hongjoong (captain)

warnings: cursing, death, some suggestive themes but absolutely nothing explicit (just implied sex)

oh good lord here we go

hongjoong is the captain of this ship. perfect captain, really - he’s got a knack for discipline while also taking care of his crew

he really does care for them, like after all he’s been through they’re basically his family at this point. he’s got nothing but them, this ship, and whatever they’ve managed to pillage from other crews - if he lost a single member, hongjoong isn’t sure if he could handle it

actually that’s a lie. he knows he could handle it. but it’s already happened several times, and the pain he feels but has to hide sometimes makes him want to just throw himself into the waves

(especially with a certain person, but i won’t elaborate on that just yet)

anyway his crew respects him even if they don’t always act it (looking at you wooyoung), they like to fool around and hongjoong will lovingly deal with it 

however when they’ve really messed up....

let’s just say no one ever likes being called to hongjoong’s quarters

most often it’s one of woosan or both for fooling around a little too often but everyone’s been there at least once

even seonghwa like???? what did seonghwa ever do

(he’s never elaborated. neither has hongjoong. that somehow just makes everyone even more afraid ksjdngsdh)

but sometimes! the turn tables!! and people will call hongjoong to their rooms

i say people like it’s more than one person 

i mean it technically is?? seonghwa and you??? but people feels like it implies many persons when in reality it’s just you and seonghwa and seonghwa comes in much later than you do

the first time it happens is when hongjoong almost fucking passes out on deck because 1. the sun is out and it’s hot as balls and 2. he’s been up for over twenty four hours straight after a battle trying to make sure everything is in order

which no one realizes - i mean even if your captain is motherfucking kim hongjoong you’d assume this dude at least took like an hour nap during that 24 hr+ period of time but NO this motherfucker is stupid when it comes to himself - until you’re heading belowdecks with him and hongjoong takes ONE FUCKING STEP down the stairs and almost keels over right then and there

you drag him to his room and even half collapsed he’s trying to say he needs to do something or the other but you just stand over him with your arms crossed n shit and hongjoong’s like okay never mind yes i will sleep

(he sleeps for fifteen hours straight)

anyway after that you went up on deck and called that motherfucker to your room in the same tone of voice he uses to call the others to his room and gave him the beatdown of his fucking life

maybe hongjoong’s a masochist because that’s when he realized he was head over heels in love with you

like?? in the middle of you yelling at him to take care of himself because kim fucking hongjoong what do you think is gonna happen if you die??? huh???? you think woosan can handle themselves????? you think I can deal with them?????? and good fucking lord if you’re going to die at least let it be of something badass you dumb piece of shit not like FALLING DOWN THE STAIRS BECAUSE YOU WERE TOO TIRED TO SEE WHERE YOUR FOOT WAS GOING -

and halfway through hongjoong isn’t even listening to you he’s just trying to figure out how it took so long for him to realize this

you’ve been together like... forever. literally almost as long as hongjoong can remember

you two got your first ship together, recruited the others together, decided to find the treasure you’ve now been seeking for YEARS together, literally everything started with you so why is it only now that hongjoong is realizing just how much he’s in love with you

he kinda blurts it out a couple of months later when you’re aggressively forcing him down to the medbay because he wanted everyone else to get treated first before the ship’s doctor looked at his wounds and you just say ‘confessing your love isn’t going to get you out of a doctor’s visit now i don’t care if you hurt your leg i’ll carry you if i have to so mOVE YOUR ASS’

he falls even more in love with you after that

and you don’t leave him hanging - you’ve been in love with hongjoong for as long as he’s been in love with you, it just... didn’t really manifest in a visible way?? like you’ve always been aggressively caring with him. it got a lot more aggressive when you realized your feelings but hongjoong just thought that was like. a normal thing

lmao you thought

but yeah so everyone’s like WE BEEN KNEW when you start spending more and more time in hongjoong’s room instead of the quarters you share with the other crew members

they don’t even care they’re just like HELL YEAH MORE SPACE

also they (read: woosan) love teasing the two of you but then you just hit them over their heads and ask if they’d like to be called to your room

they shut up immediately and you just go back to hongjoong’s room

(he kisses softly, by the way, but with so much passion it feels like one of the storms that mother nature uses to buffet your ship around. when hongjoong kisses you like this it feels like everything in you is breaking apart and reforming all at once, like he’s taking your life and breathing it back into you at the same time, and if your hands begin to move and someone gets pushed onto the bed who’s gonna say shit?)

but a pirate’s life is a pirate’s life and everyone is literally risking their neck to sail the seas the way they do - no one is safe, ever. not during battles, not even when you’re standing around on the ship’s deck

and certainly not when mother nature decides to wreak havoc on the water that you and hongjoong have begun to think of as home.

they’ve seen the storm coming all day, literally everyone is prepped and serious and no one’s fooling around because yeosang has been watching the clouds for hours and there’s no sign of the storm passing them by

so when the wind and water begin to toss the ship around, they’re ready. everyone’s ready. everything seems to be going smoothly until a couple of hours pass and the storm is only growing worse

hongjoong can’t see in the darkness, not with clouds covering the stars and the moon, not with water pounding over the deck in waves higher than yunho and mingi combined, he’s soaked and shivering but still yelling orders to anyone who can hear them and he’s just praying they’ll make it through the night, make it through the few hours left until morning

the few people on deck are mostly tied to stable things with rope so that no one goes overboard

but what no one expects is for a section of rope to snap, taking san with it

people start screaming and grabbing for him and yunho literally lunges for san but the wind doesn’t care, it slams him against the railing so hard hongjoong feels his own teeth chatter in his jaw with the power behind that hit

a wave crashes over deck at the same moment and everyone thinks he’s lost.

until a literal banshee screech tears through the wind and waves and you grab san, dragging him away from the railing and back toward jongho, who seizes onto a limp san with strong arms

and you turn around but you turn around too easily, like there isn’t a rope tying you to the mast -

because there isn’t. it snapped when you ran forward to get san

you come to this realization at the same time hongjoong does and he sees the panic in your eyes just as he reaches out to you - now there’s nothing tying you down, nothing to keep you from being swept away by the next wave, nothing but his fingertips just touching yours -

but it’s too late. water crashes over hongjoong and salt stings his eyes and when he opens them, there’s one less shadow on the deck than there should be

and there is no sound of screaming from the water below.

for days afterwards the only thing hongjoong can see is the look of terror in your eyes just before the wave stole his sight and your outstretched hand away

and all he can think is how he should’ve been stronger. faster. braver. literally anything

you two always joked that he’d be the first to go because he never took care of himself but death caught you first

and it isn’t fair

it isn’t like hongjoong hasn’t lost crew members before - he has. but the loss of someone so close, someone who’s been with him for over a decade, someone who knows him better than he knows himself almost breaks him. there isn’t even a body left to burn or bury. you’ve been lost to the water that hongjoong thought of as home

it still is his home. the movement of water comforts him far more than solid land ever did, but there’s a new fear, a new respect for mother nature whenever he stares at the shining blue waves that killed you

eventually he recovers with the help of his crew, and they go on to look for the treasure. there are adventures along the way and throughout each of them, hongjoong thinks of what it would be like if you were there, fighting by his side

and then they find the treasure, after years of pillaging and exploring. they find the treasure and when hongjoong approaches the center of the island, the only thoughts running through his mind are of you, what you would do if you were here, what you would say, how you’d look at him with pride and that little smirk he loved to kiss off your face

he attempts to open the treasure trove and an apparition appears, the apparition that guards it. hongjoong’s ready for the wisp of smoke

until it turns into you.

but it isn’t you. bitterness twists your familiar eyes and a deep, betrayed frown downturns your lips and hongjoong is paralyzed - it’s you but at the same time it isn’t -

then you open your mouth

and with the same voice that used to remind him to take care of himself, the same voice that used to remind him you loved him

you ask why he wasn’t faster. why he wasn’t stronger. why he didn’t manage to pull you out of the wave and save you, why he failed when it came to you

it hits him like arrows to the chest because these are all thoughts hongjoong himself has had. they plagued him for days, months, years even after your death, and even now, they still do - but his crew has managed to help him keep those thoughts at bay recently, because deep down, they know and he knows that you would never think that way

yet here you are, expression bitter and angry, speaking those same thoughts seonghwa reassured him you would never say

he can’t open the trove that day. he comes back again. and again. and again and again and again but every time he breaks down at the sight of the loathing in your face and it isn’t until seonghwa and jongho literally drag him back to the ship and set sail again that he stops

but the apparition haunts him now, mixed with visions of you disappearing from his fingertips as the wave tosses you overboard

and this time, hongjoong doesn’t know if he’ll ever recover.

seonghwa (boatswain, later quartermaster)

warnings: cursing, death, blood, implied physical abuse (nothing explicitly described)

so seonghwa didn’t live on the streets from the start like hongjoong or san, he actually came from nobility

look at his face and tell me it isn’t noble. yeah you can’t that’s what i fucking thought

anyway yeah, he was born into a noble family and pretty much lived that way until like his late teens or something when pirates ransacked his town, killed his family, and took him hostage

but we’re not going to unpack all of that yet so let’s go back in time to when seonghwa was still a member of nobility

his family was famous for being kind. like a lot of other nobles in other towns were snobby assholes who didn’t give two shits about the common people

and maybe it’s just because seonghwa’s family was nobility in a smaller town and as such knew a lot of commoners/peasants more closely plus the fact that they were never really rich rich, their title just comes from some wealthy ancestor and they’ve managed to keep it throughout the years

but yeah, seonghwa’s family isn’t universally hated among the peasantry because they’re actually decent fucking people and they protect those under them

so seonghwa learns from a young age to be kind and pleasant and as he grows older, he learns how to run the estate, how to play politics with the kingdom and the town, all that good stuff

and with all of that comes marriage, too

it might’ve been a problem if there was no one around that he liked but luckily you’ve been a fixture in seonghwa’s life since he was very young

your family is also nobility in a nearby small town and it’s actually perfect - you’re the younger sibling, so you don’t inherit the estate, but you do have a sharp mind and qualities that a family would be looking for when they try to find someone to marry their son off to

what makes everything even better is that since you’ve been around for a long time, seonghwa is head over heels in love with you and you’re head over heels in love with him

classic childhood friends to lovers

when you visited seonghwa’s town, he’d take you to the marketplace to meet people and you’d do the same for him

at balls, you would dance with each other as much was deemed appropriate by high society

someone’s kid got lost one time and seonghwa had carried her around with you, singing softly as you asked around for the kid’s parents until they were found

needless to say at this point your villages know the two of you very well and it isn’t just your parents rooting for this marriage lmao

so you get engaged and all and you aren’t going to marry until a few years later, you’re too young at the moment and both of you would prefer a little more freedom before you have to settle down

but at the engagement ceremony you exchanged rings and you two haven’t taken them off since, so it serves as a reminder of your bond

not like you need a reminder anyway - seonghwa is a dream come true, and there’s no way you would ever voluntarily leave him. ever. 

except nothing ever goes to plan especially in my universes so pirates attack just a year before you two are supposed to be married

you’re in seonghwa’s town visiting his family when the attack happens and both of you have just witnessed both of his parents being cut down before your eyes and you’re pulling seonghwa out of the estate, hoping to escape in the flood of screaming and fleeing people

but someone knocks you down as seonghwa yells your name

his hand loosens from yours and you try to grab at him but he just gets further and further away

you scream for him but someone else is already dragging him in the opposite direction and that’s the last you see of him

somehow you escape and manage to get back to your own village but seonghwa’s entire family is dead

there’s no reason to believe he survived either

and from that day on you grow a hatred of pirates so strong that you leave your family to join the navy just so you can take your revenge on those who took seonghwa and his family away from you

most of the navy recruits are children of former or current members, you’re the odd one out with your noble manners and method of speech

but you adapt quickly and desire for revenge fuels your motivation to keep moving, to keep getting better no matter how many times people knock you down

it’s for seonghwa and his family. always for them. 

you finish training with high honors and when you’re assigned to a fleet, you actually make a bit of a name for yourself - pirates don’t know who you are, exactly, but they’ve given you a nickname based on your appearance and it gets passed around in hushed whispers whenever it’s rumored that a navy fleet is coming to port

anyway that’s you. let’s move on to seonghwa

seonghwa isn’t dead (obviously), he was taken hostage because he’s young and strong and the pirates who took him thought he’d be a decent cabin boy or something, or maybe even a sailor

so seonghwa ends up working on that ship

the pirates really do not treat him well, the only moments of respite he gets are in sleep or when they dock sometimes

there are nights where seonghwa just wishes a huge storm would crack the ship in half and leave them all to drown, he has nothing to live for anymore - his parents are dead and he doesn’t even want to think about what might’ve happened to you

but spite fuels him and keeps him alive

seonghwa isn’t all that much of a goody two shoes after all - he knows how to use a sword and learns quickly. he also acts well and adapts

which is why eventually, he gains enough tentative trust from the crew that he won’t run away, so he’s allowed to explore the towns a little before the ship makes their attack wherever they are

but little do they know seonghwa is patient, observant, and has always been looking for the right time to slip away

so when the pirates do attack, seonghwa runs off and hides in the next town, where he meets hongjoong + his partner who have just gotten themselves a ship

so seonghwa joins the tiny crew of hongjoong’s pirate ship

he has reservations at first about the whole pirate thing, given who offed his entire family (and you - he thinks you’re dead and who can blame him?), but seonghwa quickly learns  hongjoong isn’t a mindless pillager or killer. he protects his crew and he has a purpose that he’s driven to fulfill - find the treasure and have a few adventures on the way. that’s all

he’s the first of the crew to join hongjoong besides his partner, and the three of them grow very close as the years pass

seonghwa starts out as the ship’s boatswain, keeping track of supplies and the ship’s general maintenance - he’s good at that, seeing as he has a sharp eye for detail and things that seem off, so he knows when people have been sneaking food (read: wooyoung)

hongjoong may be the captain, but the crew likes to joke that seonghwa is the one who actually keeps the ship running

he’s always there to listen to the newer members’ fears, their stories, or just to sit with them in comforting silence so they know they’re not alone

because if there’s anything seonghwa knows, it’s the horrible feeling of being completely alone, cut off from all those who once loved him

when hongjoong’s partner dies, seonghwa takes on the role of caring aggressively for hongjoong (aka asking the captain to come to his room)

albeit it’s in different ways because no one could ever replace the captain’s quartermaster. even if seonghwa technically holds the title now, it’s really in name only. yeah seonghwa fulfills the same duties, but everyone agrees - even him - that a void was left when hongjoong’s partner died, a void that’s closed up a little but will never fully leave

so time passes like this, seonghwa as a pirate, you in the navy, both completely unaware that the other is fully alive

until your crew receives word that a small pirate ship is going to be docking in a nearby port and you rush to meet it there

the fight is bloody and dirty, neither side playing fair

but you keep fighting, not stopping until you corner a pirate in an empty alley of the town

both of you have your swords out and there’s so much blood and grime on your faces that you can barely see

but there’s something familiar in the pirate’s expression. something in his eyes

something that makes you pause.

and then the bloody afternoon sunlight catches on something metal on his finger

a ring. a very familiar ring

identical, actually, to the one still on your hand. 

seonghwa reaches the conclusion at the same time you do and for a moment it’s kind of funny like that spiderman meme 

you two are just staring wide-eyed at each other while individual battles rage around you

seonghwa’s reeling - yes, the nickname that his crew had tossed around did get at some of your features, but never once in his entire life did he think that the navy fighter everyone feared so much would be you

somehow, even with all the dirt and blood caking your skin, you look as beautiful as ever

but the shattered look in your eyes is nothing he’s ever seen before.

meanwhile you’ve just gone slack with betrayal, betrayal at the knowledge that pirates killed seonghwa’s entire family yet he ended up on a pirate ship anyway, fighting battles for the fucking ship

he looks the same - a little older, a little more mature, his lips are still full and his eyes still beautiful with that same nose you loved to kiss so many years ago

but god, every cell in your body aches to scream, to rip him apart for this betrayal he made to everything you two stood for

(deep down you know there must be a reason for this - seonghwa doesn’t make decisions lightly, if he joined a pirate ship and is fighting for them, there has to be some reason why)

(but in the moment you can only feel the fury and betrayal that your former fiancé and the love of your life, the same person who was kidnapped by pirates and whose family was killed by pirates, has joined a crew)

except you can’t kill him. you know you can’t

and neither can he. you’re standing in front of him, his literal enemy - he’s trained over the years to become ruthless to those who aren’t members of his crew, to show no mercy

but at the sight of your eyes and the ring still on your finger, all of that training just shatters

you barely even exchange words. all you do is look at each other and then at the rings still on your hands, a promise unwillingly broken

it crosses your mind to take it off and throw it in the dust, show just how much that ring means to you when seonghwa’s betrayed you so badly

but just like you can’t kill him, you can’t take off the ring, even if it feels like it’s choking the circulation out of your finger

because even after all this time, you still love him. you still love seonghwa as much as he loves you

seonghwa just watches you level your sword at him, the blade positioning itself over his throat

he can’t kill you. he won’t. he knows that and he’s willing to accept his death at your hands

but you don’t do it. you just say, in a voice that’s broken beyond repair

if i see your face ever again, i swear on every god that exists that i will kill you

and you storm out of the alley, leaving a shaking seonghwa behind

(he doesn’t see it, but you can barely hold your sword steady either)

the fight ends a few hours later, seonghwa helps carry the injured back to the ship and set sail

it isn’t until hongjoong pulls him aside and tells him to wash up that he realizes just how tired he is

but even then, he can’t sleep. he ends up on deck, sitting against the rails, looking up at the night sky full of cold, twinkling stars as the ship bobs in the waves

hongjoong’s steering and asks him what’s wrong

seonghwa doesn’t say anything. it isn’t because hongjoong would throw him overboard for knowing a member of the navy, seonghwa’s proven himself loyal many times over and hongjoong knows that

but because even though hongjoong knows about his past and even about you, seonghwa doesn’t know what to say

he doesn’t know how to verbalize the vision of you, bloody and dirty, carrying a sword and wearing the ring he put on your hand so many years ago

he doesn’t know how to explain the achingly vivid picture of you painted in his mind, clearly older and more mature, having grown into your features over the years and still as gorgeous as ever

but worst of all, he doesn’t know how to describe the absolutely shattered look in your eyes, broken shards of glass fragmenting your expression as you took in his face, his body, the clothes and look of a pirate

seonghwa knows he couldn’t give up this life now, not after all that hongjoong has done and sacrificed for him, maybe he’d have tried to explain that to you if time had allowed it. he might even have asked you to come with him

but something tells him you wouldn’t have cared because in your eyes, he betrayed you, betrayed his family and yours

and it hurts. it hurts knowing he pained you this badly because after all this time, seonghwa still loves you

it’s why he never took off the ring, after all.

right now he honestly doesn’t know which is worse - thinking you’re dead and that he’ll never see you again, or knowing you’re alive but that you hate him and will kill him on sight the next time you meet

moonlight glitters mockingly on the ring on his finger, once a reminder of you and a promise of love

now a reminder of that same promise broken, and a new promise made - one that secures his death, should he ever come face to face with his love again.

yunho (able-bodied sailor (ABS), later boatswain)

warnings: cursing

ah yes yunho. resident teddy bear who the new recruits think is just very soft - like why is he even on a pirate ship?

then the first battle comes around and they see yunho tearing around like a demon

and suddenly it all makes sense

anyway yunho really is a teddy bear most of the time - along with seonghwa, he’s the one that new recruits go to the most when they don’t know what’s happening because he’s kind and willing to explain if he’s got a bit of time

however if you come for anyone this man cares about, you’re fucked with around ten capital Fs 

yunho knows how to handle the sword at his belt, plus several other types of weapons as well

honestly probably only san and hongjoong are more skilled at fighting than yunho is

but moving on! yunho started out as one of the able-bodied sailors (that’s what they’re called on the site i’m using), essentially semi-skilled but not really specialized in specific roles of the ship

however when hongjoong’s partner was swept away in the storm, seonghwa became quartermaster and chose yunho to take over his previous boatswain duties

because yunho’s responsible and he knows what he’s doing, he also followed seonghwa around a lot when he was a bit younger so he’s learned more or less what a boatswain does - plus, he’s a quick learner, so anything he doesn’t know already seonghwa can teach him quickly

and because yunho’s now boatswain and is in charge of supplies on the ship, he spends a lot of time in the towns at every port where they legally dock because supplies!

which is how he meets you

you’re a commoner just trying to run your little grocery store, and times have been tough until yunho passes by your place and buys some fruit

throughout his brief stay in the town he comes by again and again and gives you enough business on his own to kickstart your life again

(but like let’s also not forget that a bunch of kids - boys and girls alike - start crowding in to see what this hot older dude is doing at this little grocery store)

so you’re eternally grateful to one jung yunho for helping you get back on your feet even if it was unintentional

and the next time the ship has docked in this port, you make sure to thank him effusively for it

because it isn’t just you that you’re trying to support - you have family too and you were never exactly the wealthiest, so the added business really means a lot to you regardless of whether yunho intended to have such an effect or not

yunho just blushes and says he’s happy to have helped, then tries to wave away the small bundle of groceries you give him for free

you think you’ve succeeded but yunho is Smooth and drops a small sack of coins into your front pocket just before he disappears into the market crowd

which is the start of your crush on the handsome guy named jung yunho who smiles like a teddy bear and has the sparkling eyes to match

meanwhile yunho has had a fucking crush on you since he passed by the grocery that first time

which is why he came back a second and a third time during that first visit

and why he keeps coming back, visit after visit until he’s staying in the store way past the time he should be returning to the ship and eventually kissing you in the moonlight just outside the store before he walks you home

you feel like you’re on cloud nine after that first kiss - yunho is everything you’ve ever wanted in a partner

your family loves him too, based on the encounters they’ve had the few times he was around when they were there

the only thing that worries you is the fact that he spends so much time... elsewhere

you’re well aware of the fact that he doesn’t live here, not even close by - you’ve seen the ships docked in port and yunho’s told you enough for you to understand that he travels for his living

but ateez is skilled at camouflaging themselves as not pirates, but something more benign - traveling merchants, things like that

and with yunho coming to town every so often with the purpose of restocking the ship, it isn’t so hard to believe

but as time goes on you start to grow a little suspicious

you’ll never take traveling away from yunho, as much as you’d like to settle down with him you know that the sea is his first love just as he’s yours, and you would never force him to choose

you can satisfy yourself just knowing he’ll come back to visit, no matter what

but sometimes you prod a little more and it’s uneasy the way yunho just clams up

because normally he’s happy to talk about anything and everything

but out of wishful thinking + the desire to pretend nothing is wrong, you just ignore it

until one night you’re out on a walk and you hear a familiar voice discussing routes and paths with a different, unfamiliar voice

but the first one you know

because it’s yunho

they’re talking about treasure and ships and how much gold they have and what they need

pirates

you try to reason it all away, try to spin their words in a way that makes them out to merely be the traveling merchants you always assumed they were

but then you realize - yunho never said that to you. it was always just your assumption

he never lied, but he never told you the truth

and now you have to face it on your own - yunho is part of a crew of pirates and there’s no reasoning it away

especially when you see the blades strapped to their sides glinting in the moonlight

the night is long and yunho doesn’t come by the next day, so you have time to think

and by the time he does come around, you’ve made a decision

that day, stone cold and unwavering, you tell him you want nothing more to do with him. even as your heart cracks at the dawning horror and shame and pain on yunho’s face, you tell him that on no account can you be found dealing with pirates

if it were just you, you might risk a little more, consider keeping this relationship with yunho a little longer

but you don’t live in a place that’s known for its sympathy to pirates - it isn’t a royal navy haven, exactly, but it isn’t lawless either

and you have a family to protect, too. the grocery store is all you have and if someone found out you were having a dalliance with a pirate, that might be taken away from you

yunho is crushed, absolutely crushed when he hears you and sees you speaking this way

part of him wants to get angry because you’ve been together for this long - what changes just because you found out he’s a pirate?

but he understands, even though he doesn’t want to. he understands that you have a family you need to protect and that a relationship with a pirate will only jeopardize that

it’s what he would do, right, if his own family, his crew mates, were also in danger? if he had a relationship with someone who would put them in harm’s way, he’d cut it off just as you did

so that day, you both part ways. neither of you expects to see the other ever again

and for several years, it seems that way

your family stops asking about that nice traveling merchant who looked at you with the sweetest smile

and seonghwa helps yunho out of his stupor. he understands, after all - his own love swore to kill him if they ever met again

broken hearts eventually heal, cracks still visible but no longer gaping wide, and life goes on

until yunho bursts into your little store one day, eyes wide and face white

you almost don’t recognize him at first - besides the fact that it’s been several years, you’ve never seen him look this frazzled

but once you do recognize him it’s like all those years fall away and you’re in love with him again, reaching out to touch him and ask him what’s wrong, despite the words you spoke that last day

yunho grabs your hands in a vice grip when you reach out and in the most serious voice you’ve ever heard him use, he tells you to get out of here with everyone you love

because other pirates are coming to attack. 

it takes you a second to register his words when he first says them because what - pirates? what would they ever want to do with your little village?

but the fear in yunho’s eyes makes it clear he’s telling the truth

so all you do is nod and squeeze his hands unconsciously, maybe, before picking up your things and running down the path back home

yunho doesn’t follow, not at first. he stays back a little to warn the other families he grew closer with during his visits to you, the kind people who welcomed him when he was here

some believe him, some don’t, and they all have the same look of fear in their eyes once they realize what yunho truly is

he doesn’t care, though - it doesn’t matter how much that fear hurts him, as long as they get out safe, that’s all that matters

yunho catches up to you just as you’re leaving the house. your family starts raising questions but you cut them off with a glare, and one of the older members of the family just herds everyone away to give you and yunho a last moment of space

except you don’t say anything. neither of you do

it’s half not knowing what to say after so many years apart

but it’s also half knowing exactly what the other is thinking, even after so many years apart

at some point yunho took your hands and now your touch just makes it painfully clear that even though he loved you, still loves you, none of this was ever meant to be

maybe in another lifetime, in a more perfect universe, but not this one

and the same thoughts are running through your head as you squeeze his fingers, rough and scarred from all his time on the sea

he pulls you close, presses a kiss on your forehead

you rest your head against his shoulder and whisper thank you as you squeeze him one last time

when you pull away, there’s apology in both your gazes - you for breaking things apart so painfully, yunho for having the profession he does

but there’s also acceptance and gratitude for years well spent in your love

(and of that love, much of it still remains)

you return to your family, who’s still waiting, leaving yunho behind

and one more time before you leave forever, you look back

he’s still there, watching you go

you let yourself smile again, once more

yunho lets himself smile too as he waves goodbye

it’s the goodbye you should have had the last time you parted, instead of the forced coldness and biting words you used to cut your relationship apart, and regret pinches deep in your chest

but you can only be grateful for the second chance to say farewell, so you wave too, exchanging one last smile before you disappear

neither of you sees the other ever again.

yeosang (sailing master)

warnings: cursing, death, semi-graphic depiction of blood, implied drowning

hehet

guys i love this dude he’s so fucking cute i want to pat his head all the time

not in a bias way he’s just v cute and i adore him

ok this is supposed to be a pirate au not me yelling about how beautiful one kang yeosang can be so let’s start

yeosang is sailing master of hongjoong’s ship, which means he’s in charge of navigation and following the maps and all

and he’s very good at his job! yeosang’s very smart and knows what he’s doing, also is very observant so if he sees something’s wrong in a map or something he will actually make notes and fix things so next time the crew is prepared

spends most of his time up in the crow’s nest because that’s the best vantage point from where he can see other ships and/or land

except sometimes he speaks a little too softly so he has to yell like five times for whoever’s steering to hear him

(wooyoung likes to joke that he should be the one up in the nest because he’s loud as fuck but then yeosang reminds him of that one time he tried to read a map but it was upside down and yeosang was the one who managed to put them back on course)

(wooyoung then shuts up)

yeosang was born in a relatively well-off family, not nobility or anything but they had some money which meant he was educated

and he ended up being pretty good at math n stuff and really like screwing around with the maps he’d find in his parents’ small library

except his parents died of a plague when he was little, and he got sent to live in an orphanage

he took the maps and books with him and that’s where he grew up until wooyoung came around

you know that video where yeosang says he was v innocent and didn’t know how the world worked and his parents were worried about him until he became friends with wooyoung? yeah that’s essentially what’s at play here

before they met yeosang was pretty much just in his own little world. didn’t interact much with the other orphans and the orphanage owners really did not give a shit so he just sat in his corner reading and rereading books n shit that he’d taken from his home

but when yeosang turned idk let’s say sixteen he met wooyoung on the streets

and for some reason??? wooyoung took a liking to yeosang despite the fact that yeosang would barely give him the time of the day

in fact yeosang liked wooyoung’s partner much more

(which made wooyoung a little jealous but we’ll talk more about that later)

(i’ll just say it wasn’t romantic but wooyoung can be a blind little shit sometimes so you see where this is going)

but eventually woosang + woo’s partner become good friends

woo + partner have avoided the orphanage their whole life, just making their own living on the streets

until one day they come to yeosang with news that there’s a pirate ship willing to take them on

and they want yeosang to come with them. 

to yeosang it sounds like half a dream and half some ludicrous fantasy - first of all it’s a pirate ship, what can he even do there?

second of all IT’S A PIRATE SHIP, THEY’RE ALL GOING TO DIE

but because wooyoung is wooyoung and his partner is his partner they manage to convince yeosang to give up his half-life at the orphanage - he’s not doing anything there anyway, and at least now he might be able to travel and see the places he’s only marked on maps

and hongjoong is actually ecstatic to have yeosang on board because even though seonghwa can do some navigation, he was never the best at geography n stuff even when he was taking lessons as a noble so having someone who knows maps and details of different lands, even if he’s never seen them before, is a blessing

they all settle in on the ship together and for a while, life goes somewhat well for yeosang. the ship is small and they haven’t really built up a major reputation yet so a lot of the other pirate ships either ignore them or just literally don’t see them

which gives yeosang time to learn swordplay and other skills he needs as a pirate

and as time goes on, the crew grows larger, they gain recognition on the seas, and one night as he sits drinking on the deck with woosan + woo’s partner under the stars, he admits to himself that he feels happy

but then you come along

ateez has just won a battle against a smaller ship that you happen to be the sailing master of

except unlike sailing master yeosang, you fucking hate it there because everyone’s a bitch and willing to stab someone in the back in order to get in the captain’s good graces

and get this: the captain is still fucking alive after the battle and you just want to be anywhere but there

so in a fit of desperation you’re like LET ME ON YOUR FUCKING SHIP I HATE IT HERE MY CAPTAIN’S A BITCH I WISH HE’D DIED

which... impresses hongjoong

and it’s like?? it leaves the other ship without a sailing master so mayhaps they’re even more fucked than hongjoong intended

so you get welcomed onto the crew!

and of course it takes a few weeks/months to actually feel your welcome, ateez will give chances to newcomers but they have to prove themselves too

but you end up doing that when you almost beat mf jung yunho in a mock sword fight on your fifth try - which is basically unheard of in the crew since literally only san and hongjoong are better fighters than him

so everyone pretty much accepts you after that

except yeosang

it’s kind of stupid - he’s really just jealous that you’re also a sailing master, he’s afraid that he won’t be seen as useful anymore now that you’ve come along (and with better sword skills too)

and it doesn’t help that you get along so easily with woosan + the others, who are supposed to be yeosang’s friends

so this dumb fucking rivalry now exists between the two sailing masters of hongjoong’s ship, one jealous and the other just confused but going along with it

it gives seonghwa many headaches and hongjoong even more

but despite everything, no matter how much the other crew members try to talk you too out of it you both just point at each other and are like he/they are a bitch. you expect me to get along with a bitch ???

(jongho: i mean yeah you both get along with woosan so)

(woosan: ready to fight but not really because jongho has Strength)

so yeah you two are enemies in the loosest sense, like you try not to let the rivalry get in the way of actual pirate business but otherwise you’re either arguing or giving each other the cold shoulder

hongjoong wants to fucking cry because you two actually work very well together when the time calls for it, but you just refuse to deal with each other otherwise

until his partner dies in the storm.

the entire crew is in shock, the mood dampened for the next few months as hongjoong grieves

san is also blaming himself even though it isn’t his fault that his rope snapped, even less his fault that their rope snapped

and everyone is miserable

after a few days, you walk up to yeosang and are like. hey. we need to put whatever this is behind us, at least for now - hongjoong doesn’t need to deal with our bullshit on top of what he already has, and san needs as much support as he can get

yeosang agrees and a truce is formed

it’s awkward at first - you’re used to tossing around jabs like nobody’s business and you’ve kind of forgotten how to interact with each other without hurling insults

but after a few weeks you and yeosang are at least on normal speaking terms

no one says anything but you can see seonghwa’s eyes sparkling in relief whenever you two are seamlessly navigating the ship together, or when one hops into the crow��s nest to take over from the other without a word

and during that time, you and yeosang grow a little closer, whether you realize it or not

telling the other to go take a break, i’ll watch for a little while or this map looks a little off, wasn’t the mountain a little closer to the next kingdom?

one night, yeosang almost collapses of exhaustion, and you make him drink water before carrying him to bed

another night he finds you poring over maps at ass o’clock in the morning and forces you to sleep

small things like that help you grow closer over time, and eventually, you start going back to insulting each other - except it’s not really insulting, just teasing

you two will banter when working together or yell at each other to go the fuck to sleep you dimwit

and you’d like to think that it makes hongjoong feel a little better, too, when he eventually pulls himself out of his stupor and begins acting a little more like his old self again

san too - the cracked glass look in his eyes eventually fades, and he starts to smile again

life goes on - the search for the treasure never stops

and as the years go by you maybe start to see yeosang as more than a crew mate, then more than a friend

yeosang feels the same

but beyond small touches and banter and reminders to take care of yourselves, you never say anything because you two are COWARDS

which is something you will regret for the rest of your life. 

one day you end up in a battle with a ship bigger than you’ve fought before

hongjoong had tried to steer you out of the way, but the ship just followed and eventually a fight was inevitable

it’s bloody and horrible, you and san are fighting back to back while wooyoung and yeosang are occupied somewhere closer to the crow’s nest

and you don’t even have time to think, it’s all just slash and stab and kill if you can

so at first, you don’t realize it when wooyoung goes down with a pained yell and yeosang is left alone

you cut down one pirate who’s been giving you trouble and spin to help wooyoung but then you catch sight of yeosang scrambling up the crow’s nest, out of reach of the pirate trying to cut his ankles

and your blood freezes. because though yeosang is a good fighter, if he’s trying to escape rather than fight...

something has gone very wrong.

you see it in his dangling leg and yeosang’s face contorted with pain as he hauls himself into the nest - his ankle is hurt, broken or twisted or something 

but the other pirate doesn’t have such an injury. and just as yeosang falls into the nest, he begins to climb up

you ry to go over to help but another pirate blocks your way and you’re forced to forego helping yeosang because the stupid enemies just won't stop coming

you try to believe that he’ll be fine even as blood coats your vision, as you try to fight your own battle against a seemingly endless enemy

until there’s an earsplitting yell from above and you look up to see yeosang double over in pain

both you and san exchange a single glance before trying to push through the throng to climb up, even though the sinking feeling in your chest tells you it’ll be too late

the pirate fighting yeosang stabs him, eliciting another yell - you swear you feel yeosang’s blood spatter all the way down onto your head as you rush over

but you stop, eyes wide with horror when the pirate lifts up yeosang’s limp body, streaming blood

and throws him out of the nest. 

later, wooyoung will tell you that your scream was what stopped the battle. he isn’t even joking, he’s deadly serious - people stopped fighting because you screamed so loud

you don’t even remember screaming. you only remember watching yeosang’s body sail through the air and racing to the ship’s edge, hand reaching out in a futile effort to catch him before he falls

for less than half a second, you meet yeosang’s eyes, blown wide with terror and pain

and then his body crashes beneath the ocean waves

someone holds you back from jumping over the railing. you kick and thrash but they don’t let go

your throat is raw from screaming yeosang’s name over and over and over because he can’t be dead, he can’t be - yeosang can swim, you know he can

but he had horrible injuries, and the pain mixed with seawater very well could have killed him before he even had the chance to drown

you keep screaming until your voice dies and your yells turns to sobs and you start begging, begging for him to come back

but his familiar blond head never resurfaces.

yeosang dies that day, dragged beneath the waves

taking a piece of your heart with him, too. 

If you enjoyed, please don’t forget to reblog and leave a comment to tell me what you thought! Thank you for reading and have a lovely day <3

(1 reblog = 1 prayer for me I'm going to need like 10 years of rest after this much angst)

[chaseatinydream]

pirate king (21) || atz

“Run!” Wooyoung grabs you by the arm and yanks you out of the room, but once you’re out of the door you see a squadron of armed guards making their way towards the commotion. They see the two of you from opposite the building.

“Get them!” The man you presume to be the leader shouts and you wince.

Wooyoung curses under his breath and yanks you back down the corridor, both of your feet thundering on the floorboards. Your heart is hammering in your chest like you’re about to die, which you do think you might, actually. Adrenaline speeds through your veins, setting your limbs on fire, and the two of you round the corner only to meet the two guards from the courtyard with swords drawn.

You and Wooyoung manage to unsheathe your cutlasses just in time to block the overhead swings and your joined hands tear apart.

Dodging the point of the guard’s sword, you kick him in the center of the chest, sending him sprawling back against the balustrade. He manages to knock your cutlass from your hands, sending it tumbling over the railing onto the ground below, but you don’t have the time to mourn its loss. You take the opportunity to side stamp his knee, immobilizing him with a broken leg and turn back to look at Wooyoung.

To your horror, he’s struggling with his guard, a massively built man with bulging muscles. The guard has Wooyoung pinned against the wall, and all the gunner can do is to keep the point of the sword from piercing his neck, arms trembling from the strain.

You don’t have time to think.

Dashing forward, you reach for your belt and draw the next most lethal thing you have, before jumping and clinging onto the man’s back with your arms around his neck. He roars in fury and tries to throw you off, but before he can, you raise the silver hairpin and jab it into the back of his neck.

The man screams in agony, crumpling to his knees, and Wooyoung takes a second to be impressed.

“Damn, that was not what I had in mind when I gave it to you.”

You give him an incredulous look as you shove the hairpin back in your belt. The other group of guards are getting closer and closer. Luckily for you, the hallway is rather narrow so it’s difficult for the guards to make their way through, but this isn’t going to hold them off for long. “This isn’t the time for that! Let’s go!”

He takes you by the hand again and the two of you continue your mad dash for safety. Then you hear the captain shout a command that freezes the blood in your veins.

“Fire!”

Wooyoung throws you to the side, diving for cover, but you’re not lucky enough. Shot slams into the pillar you and Wooyoung are crouched behind, but a musket ball smashes into your ankle.

In that single moment, you’re in hell. Pain shoots across your leg like raw fire licking at your skin, and for a second, you just wonder how on earth anything can hurt this bad. A whimper leaves your mouth.

“Chin Hae!” Wooyoung cries in horror, rushing over to help you, but the moment he sees your foot, his face goes ashen in worry. “Oh, mother of gods…”

You immediately stop yourself from looking at it lest you throw up at the sight.

Even through the blinding agony, you understand what needs to happen. Your leg is absolutely wrecked, and there is no way you’ll be able to run to the harbour, even if you did make it down the grappling rope somehow. If you remain with Wooyoung, you’ll only be a burden to him.

And this mess is all your fault.

You glare at him through the pain. “Go, idiot! Run!”

Wooyoung ignores you, slinging your arm over his shoulder as he pulls you upright, forcing himself to ignore your low cry of anguish. “Yeah, fat chance. If I get back to the ship without you, captain will shoot me himself anyway, so I might as well die here with you. At least the navy will kill me faster.”

You groan, both in pain and at his stupid sense of humor despite your near death experience. “This isn’t the time for your dumb jokes!”

He has the gall to look offended. “My jokes are greatly beloved by all people-”

“Approach cautiously, they might be armed!” You hear the captain call to his men, and in this second Wooyoung acts, tossing a soft cased smoke bomb to the ground.

The explosive detonates with a bang, sending the soldiers into a panicked frenzy. Wooyoung takes this opportunity to grab you and run, slamming the door to Mr Ludovico Robertt’s room shut and barring it with the heavy oak desk.

The man continues snoring despite the commotion.

“How are you going to get me down?” You demand furiously, completely unable to understand why Wooyoung just won’t leave you be. “Just go and tell Captain to get out of here!”

“Not happening.” Wooyoung unwinds the rope around his waist, doing tight knots around your shoulders and under your arms. Your eyes widen as you realise what he intends to do and terror claws at your throat, adrenaline swirling in your blood.

“Are you crazy? I’d rather get shot to death than fall to it!”

“You’ll be fine!” Wooyoung reassures you as he secures the rope to the official’s four poster bed. You hear the guards at the door, pounding on it when they realise that it can’t be opened. “Mr Robertt! Mr Robertt! Are you inside?”

The man sleeps like the dead.

Wooyoung then grabs you bridal style, arms hooking you beneath the knees as he grins breathlessly at you. “You know, you should really lose some weight, Chin Hae.” You baulk at his words, attempting to punch him in the shoulder. Suddenly, you realise the two of you are way too lighthearted, as if you aren’t really in trouble.

Yup, you’re probably completely drunk on fear.

“Don’t tell me how to live my life.” You grumble, then Wooyoung holds you over the window ledge. Your arms instinctively tighten around his neck as you look at the very painful, one way drop to the ground.

“Mr Robertt! We’re coming in!” You hear the captain outside shouting as they get ready to smash the door down. Your heart leaps into your chest.

The gunner smiles broadly at you, eyes twinkling, but when he speaks, his words are honest.

“Do you trust me?”

You’re almost comforted by the genuine determination in his eyes, and you remember his vow to protect you and keep you safe. This man, your friend, crewmate and partner in crime, won’t ever leave you behind. You somehow laugh even with a mutilated leg, hanging over certain death, and with less than zero prospects of survival.

“Not at all.”

Wooyoung laughs at your answer, grin turning slightly maniacal. “Good, because I don’t trust myself in the least either.”

With that, he drops you out of the window.

You manage to hold in your scream, but Wooyoung is careful to lower you slowly to the ground and you sink onto the stone cobbles without much issue, aside from the amount of blood you can feel trickling from the wound.

The gunner drops down onto the ground next to you lightly, and without another word, you hobble down the alley with your arm slung over his shoulder. But to the mounting fear growing in you, you hear the same captain shouting from behind you.

“Fan out and search! One of them is wounded, they can’t have gotten far.”

Wooyoung makes a choice.

Turning to one of the doors, he rams it open with his shoulder and pulls you inside, much to your surprise, before slamming the door shut behind you. Your mouth falls open in shock.

“I can’t believe you just broke into someone’s house.”

He gives you a flat look as he helps you over to a small chair in the room. The two of you seem to have forced your way into a small house, and from the way that there is two of everything in the small kitchen you are in, you assume that you are in a married couple’s house.

“You just broke into an official’s estate.”

You ignore his logic and sag against the wall in relief, your aching body and battered bones aching. But the real problem is your ankle. You can feel the adrenaline begin to fade away, leaving agonizing pain steadily growing in your left foot, and for a moment, you nearly keel over from the sensation of it. You can feel that the bone of your ankle was completely smashed upon the musket ball’s impact, but you don’t know the extent of the injury yet.

“How bad is it?” You ask Wooyoung. The gunner swallows as he takes in the wound.

“Not the worse I’ve seen?” He tries to supply unhelpfully.

You groan. Asking Wooyoung about your injury isn’t going to help at all, so you swallow the bile in your throat and glance at your foot.

And oh boy is it in terrible shape.

It isn’t as bad as it could have been. The musket ball must have merely glanced of your ankle, the force of it causing the bone of your ankle to smash into pieces, but at least the lead shot hasn’t punched through your leg, leaving a gaping hole there like in the stories San used to tell you.

What the ball has done, however, is to carve a bleeding gash across your ankle and foot, and if you don’t stop the bleeding and treat it now, it’ll definitely get infected like the first musket wound you had gotten when you’d been escaping from Raguza. You have no wish to repeat the process.

“Can you get me some water, some cloth and a piece of leather?”

Wooyoung seems confused by your last odd request, but then the two of you are interrupted by a little choking noise from the side.

You turn to see a young woman standing there, dressed in a white nightgown. She’s standing in the doorway that most likely leads from the kitchen to the rest of the house with a lamp in hand, and she looks terrified.

You and Wooyoung exchange glances, before you raise your hand in an attempt at a friendly wave.

Her eyes dilate in fear and you realise how the two of you must look. Two shady men dressed completely in black, with masks over their faces, casually sitting at her kitchen table. You don’t begrudge her when she finally lets out a scream and bolts in fear, calling for her husband.

“Well, shit.” Wooyoung sighs, shaking his head as he rises to his feet. “I wonder if I can charm her into letting us hiding here-”

“You can’t seduce a married woman!” You hiss under your breath, but then the woman returns, this time with a tall, lean man at the side, with an axe. There’s a soft click of Wooyoung’s musket being primed at your side, but you lay a hand over his, shaking your head urgently. You don’t want to hurt innocents who you’ve dragged into your mess.

To your surprise, the man looks completely calm, as if he’s used to dark, shady men bursting into his house at the crack of dawn. He hefts the ax in hand, a woodcutter’s ax, you realise, and levels it at the two of you. “Who are you?”

Wooyoung steps protectively in front of you, shielding you from the man’s sight with his own body. “I won’t let you touch my friend. Put the ax down and I’ll answer your questions.” His voice is completely even, not a trace of doubt in his words.

The young man snorts, keeping his eyes locked on Wooyoung’s. They look like they could be around the same age, you realise. “Don’t tell me what to do in my own house, intruder. Take off your mask, put down that gun you’re holding, then I’ll put down my ax and maybe listen to your high tales about how you ended up here doing something completely not illegal.”

The two are locked in tense silence for a moment. Then Wooyoung’s shoulders relax slightly.

“Fair enough.” He pulls down the black scarf around his face, revealing his well defined features, before setting the gun down. “If you help treat my friend, I might even throw in an extra high tale about how he got shot. It’s a pretty interesting story.”

The man eyes you for a moment, but Wooyoung instinctively moves to protect you, shielding you from his sight. Then he lowers his ax, sighing with a reluctant smile on his lips. Your eyes widen as you realise that he’s missing two fingers on his left hand. “I hate this, but I doubt anyone so protective of his friend could be such a terrible person. Seohyun, you go back to bed for now, I’ll handle this.”

The young woman glances at her husband in worry. “Honey, will you be alright?”

He smiles at her reassuringly, kissing her lightly on the cheek. “Of course. Now go back to bed, the baby needs their sleep.”

Your eyes widen with awe. “She’s pregnant?”

Seohyun’s eyes widen as you speak and a hand comes up to protect her belly, as if afraid you might somehow attack her. You raise your hands in surrender, peeling off your mask as well. “I’m sorry… I’m a healer but I’ve never seen anything to do with childbirth before so…”

The man gestures for her to leave and she does, padding lightly out of the room. You can still hear soldiers searching for you outside.

“What are your names?” The man seats himself at the opposite end of the room, ax still in hand. Wooyoung glances at you, and you nod at him.

Be honest. This man seems like a sharp one.

“I’m Wooyoung. This is Chin Hae.” Wooyoung answers, and he looks back at you in worry at the blood still seeping from your leg. “If you don’t mind postponing this little talk, do you mind letting me treat my friend first?”

The man nods. “Go ahead.” But then his eyes darken slightly. “But any funny business, and I’m chopping the two of you up.” The ease with which he wields the massive ax lets you know this is no joke.

You shiver a little, but Wooyoung moves to get water from the bucket in the corner of the kitchen and tears a strip of cloth from his cloak. He douses the cloth in water and kneels in front of you, passing you his glove. It is made from leather, after all.

“Will this do?”

You nod, opening your mouth.

Wooyoung frowns in confusion. “What do you want me to do?”

“Put it in my mouth so I don’t wake the whole town when you clean my wound.” You tell him and you can see the pain in his eyes at what you’re going to have to endure. Wooyoung gently places the glove in your mouth and you bite down hard on it.

“I’m sorry.” Wooyoung whispers, raising the rag to your wound. “I’ll be gentle.”

You simply press your face into his shoulder in consent.

The first drag of the cloth against your wound and you feel like you want to die. Your hands come up to grip Wooyoung’s forearms, squeezing so tightly you’re sure there will be finger shaped bruises on his skin. He doesn’t make a sound, however, intently swiping the wound clean as possible, and your tears soak into the sleeve of his shirt in silence.

Finally he pulls away, putting the bloodied rag aside and you slump against the wall, panting for air as the glove falls from your mouth. Your hair sticks to the back of your neck with the cold sweat, and Wooyoung bustles to wrap a strip of cloth around your ankle.

“That didn’t hurt at all.” You manage to croak out, your throat raw from screaming into the glove. You feel boneless, as frail and weak as a newborn baby. Wooyoung’s eyes are soft with worry and concern as he leans you against the wall in a more comfortable position.

“Are you alright?”

“I will be.” Your eyes are so heavy, as if you’re physically incapable of keeping them open. You can see the woodcutter watching the two of you quietly, respectfully not making a sound. “Wooyoung-hyung?”

“Yeah, Chin Hae?” He seats himself next to you, putting an arm around your shoulder for you to lean against. You settle against him, every muscle in your body sagging from complete exhaustion. He’s soft and warm, like a pillow. You snuggle into his side, too far gone to actually register what you’re doing.

“I’m sorry about the trouble I caused.” He stiffens at your words, before one hand comes to rest in your hair, gentle and warm.

“Don’t worry about it.” He whispers back, stroking your head. “Get some rest.”

That’s the last thing you hear before darkness swallows you.

When you do wake up, there’s something warm surrounding you.

You blink the sleep from your eyes. There’s a freshness to your limbs that wasn’t there the night before, and your back is cushioned on something soft that is definitely not the wall that you fell asleep against.

Something soft… that is moving?

Then you realise you’re sitting in a chair, not the bed that you normally sleep in, nor your hammock in the rigging that you’ve learned to sleep tangled in since Seonghwa chose to bed down in the sickbay. There’s something resting on your shoulder.

You turn your head.

The first thing you see is Wooyoung’s face, slack in sleep and breathing quietly through his mouth, which is lolling open just a little. Something about him softens in his sleep, the usual confidence in his face replaced with gentleness and warmth. He looks years younger than he really is, not a battle hardened pirate but just a boy, still in the process of growing up. He’s so close you can literally count every eyelash, feel the warm puff of his breath in the crook of your neck.

You stay that way for a moment, taking in every detail on his face and basking in the warmth of his hold, because when are you going to get an opportunity to have such an intimate moment with him?

Thank you, you want to breath. Thank you for not leaving me behind.

Then your eyes fly open as the memories of what happened last night flood through your mind. The book. The gunshot. The man with the ax.

You glance around the kitchen, but it’s empty except for the two of you.

“Wooyoung-hyung.” You shake his shoulder and he stirs just a little, mumbling into the back of your neck. You can feel the leather of his collar pressing into your skin, and you suddenly want to ask him why he wears it, but you suppose it will have to wait for another time.

“Five more minutes, San.” He rasps, voice still rough from sleep and the night before. You don’t know whether to be insulted by the fact that he’s just mistaken you for your master.

“Wooyoung-hyung, it’s me, Chin Hae.”

At that, Wooyoung straightens up blearily, rubbing the sleep from his eyes like a cat stretching after a nap.

“What’s going on?”

“Where’s the man from yesterday?” You ask, searching the room for him. It looks like it’s late morning already, from the way the living room is illuminated. Wooyoung blinks sleepily and for a moment, he looks like a lost child looking for his favorite stuffed toy.

“Ahh, him? We had a good talk yesterday and bonded over what it was like to run from the Royal Navy.” He yawns, running a hand through his hair. The chains of his shackles jingle a little. “Apparently when he was younger he had a run in with them and helped his friend escape them too, but he lost a couple of fingers in the process.”

Your eyebrows raise as Wooyoung untangles himself from you, moving over to pick up a plate of bread rolls on the table. “I can’t believe we were lucky enough to get the one person along this entire row of houses who wasn’t going to rat us out to the guards the second they saw us.”

“Such little faith you have in me.” Wooyoung sighs in mock disappointment, passing you a croissant. You dig into it hungrily, your stomach grumbling from lack of food. “You should know I seduced my way out of capture situation with Yunho before, but that’s a story for a different time.”

A sad smile crosses your face uncomfortably as you take another bite. “You’re really good at seducing women, huh? You seem to have a lot of female friends.”

Wooyoung’s face darkens just a second, an unreadable expression crossing his face. “Yeah… but I’ll never trust myself with any of them.”

Your heart breaks for a moment as you realise what that means for you. “Why?”

The gunner inhales a little as he sits on the kitchen table, head resting against the wall with a forlorn expression on his face. “Before I came to the Treasure, when I was younger… I was sold to women for such… pleasures. The only relationship I know how to share with them is one of lust, not one of friendship or actual love.”

You feel something heavy in your chest, like a stone sinking to the bottom of the sea. You can’t let the bond you’ve built with Wooyoung just break, simply because of this. No, how could anyone do this to Wooyoung as a child? How could they scar him like that?

You make your decision.

If you can keep Wooyoung, the one who was willing to risk his life for yours, as a friend, you don’t mind masquerading as a man for the rest of your life.

Wooyoung looks so lost in his past that you’re desperate to wrench him out of it.

“Hey, hyung?”

He snaps out of his little reverie to look at you in surprise. “Yeah?”

You undo the bandage he’s done around your leg, pointing at it. The wound has started to heal slightly, the scab over the wound having formed, but you know of a way to speed it up. You’ve been practicing again and again for days now, and San says you’ve gotten a pretty good hang of it already, but this is the first time you’re going to do it without your master at your side.

“Look.” You say.

You focus on your body, the blood that rushes through every vein, the energy that lives in every part of you, that gives you strength to move and live. You gather it and channel it down to your injury, and a gentle pulse runs down your leg.

Wooyoung’s eyes widen at the sight. “That’s so cool! I didn’t know you could do it too!”

You nod as you feel the pieces of bone moving and shifting, joining back to form one, single piece. The torn flesh weaves itself together and skin crawls over the wound, before the entire injury simply vanishes, as if it’s never existed.

What should have taken weeks to heal, done in a single minute.

Wooyoung frowns a little. “Won’t that have negative repercussions, though?”

“Yeah. I’ll probably sleep like the dead once we’re back on ship.” You tell him as you stand, testing out your foot. It still feels a little achy, but it’s better than yesterday. “Doing this with too severe wounds will drain you of too much stored energy and you might even die, so master told me to do this only with small wounds and in cases of great need.”

“Why didn’t you do it last night, then?” The gunner asks as he passes you the last bun. You take it gratefully.

“I wouldn’t have been able to concentrate enough with the pain. I probably would have exploded some small bit of me, and I really didn’t want that.”

Wooyoung is about to nod agreement, but then someone appears at the door.

“Wooyoung-ah.” It’s the man from yesterday and they’re already addressing each other informally. Your partner rises to incline his head.

“Thanks for the food and letting us stay the night.”

The man shakes his head. “No problem. It’s the least I could do for someone so dedicated to his friend.” He glances at you. “You have a good friend, Chin Hae. Do avoid getting shot sometime.”

Your cheeks flush a little, but you nod.

“I will.”

The man turns back to Wooyoung. “You two should leave now before the morning guard begins their patrol.”

The two of you exchange glances. You need to get back to captain and report what you’d found out. The man ushers you to the front door, holding it open for the two of you.

“I wish you the best of luck, mate. Anytime you need to invade the official’s building again, just drop by. But don’t make too much trouble for them. They’ve done this town good.”

Wooyoung turns to him as you leave the building into the busy street. “Thank you, Soobin.”

The man waves and the door shuts before him.

“Well, that was a pretty eventful night.” Wooyoung stretches his arms above his head, cracking his back as the two of you make your way back to ship. Soobin’s house is surprisingly close to where the Treasure is moored. You nod.

“I can’t wait to take a long, long nap.”

The gangplank creaks under your feet like a welcome home, your footsteps echoing together. It’s surprisingly quiet, peaceful and you don’t hear the normal ruckus you usually would this late in the morning. You frown. Are they that tired today?

Wooyoung detects it too and pauses, sniffing the air. Then he turns to look at you in worry.

“Something isn’t quite right-”

“Seize them!”

You jerk around in horror, only to be caught around the middle by an arm. You struggle but it’s useless, the man holding you is simply too strong for you to fight off. The first thing you see is Wooyoung being torn from you by two guards as they strip him of his weapons, forcing him to his knees.

The next thing you feel is the cold steel of a musket being pressed against your temple and a smirk against your ear.

“Got you.”

[tu-mint]

Amendment

A/N: Sooo I’ve been meaning to share my Mortal Kombat stuff on here for a while, I wanted to wait for the movie to come out first 😅🤣

TW: mentions of torture & sexual assault

In which Shang Tsung and the Black Dragon are officially put down and Earthrealm's defenders are able to return home, but Raelynn is stuck in her thoughts, but one of the young Kombatants is able to help her reconsider the negativity in her mind. (Based around MK11 & Aftermath but w/ a twist?)

Raelynn knew this all too well. With her entity as a half god, a change in time would do nothing to erase the horrifying memory in her mind back in the Black Dragon's dungeon -- at least, that's what it felt like. Hours upon hours of nothing but brutal beatings, each kick, punch, and swing as harsh as the last. While it wouldn't have hurt too much being that she was stronger than the average mortal, the bindings fused with the dark power of Shinnok's amulet extracted much of her godlike strength and left her as a helpless bait to be shredded and mauled at by the jaws of vicious and starved predators, desperate to take a leap at the prey before them. It still seemed unbelievable how she was alive even after all the bruises and cuts and blood...but she managed. After all, those shallow wounds were all but nothing comapred to--

The demigoddess shivered involuntarily and inhaled sharply. Thankfully, everyone aboard was too immersed in their own activities to notice her sudden actions, but she knew she wasn't stable enough with where her thoughts were treading. Her eyes searched for her son who was currently speaking in a group of the younger Kombatants. A yellow strip of cloth with an intricate design she couldn't make out was fastened around his bicep, and she wondered where it had come from until her eyes peered at the young male he stood beside. Takeda, son to Kenshi and pupil under Grandmaster Hasashi, was missing the usual yellow band that adorned his head as a reminder to those that he was a member of the Shirai Ryu clan. His short onyx locks blew freely but he didn't seem to mind all that much, instead grinning down at Haru who wore the cloth proudly. Cassie and Jacqui mirrored the telepath's reaction, the blonde pulling out her phone and snapping a picture. The sight warmed her heart and she was thankful the young fighters didn't look upon her son with irritation, but rather genuine care and happiness. When Haru had told her of the adventures and stories spent with them, a pang of guilt struck her for the early misjudgement on her part, believing they were just frivolous juveniles that only gained their high positions due to the status of their families.

Wishing not to allow her brooding to draw unwanted attention, Raelynn slipped silently to the back of the ship. Her efforts did not go unnoticed by Raiden who stood near the hull of the ship, but he decided against speaking with her in that moment.

He recalled the time he had found her, bound like a dog and covered in welts and lacerations big and small. She was curled into a ball, shaking and burying her face into her knees. It was then Raiden became aware of the state of her clothing, torn and barely covering her form as if someone intentionally ripped and pulled at it to expose more of her. Immediately he slipped out of his own robe and pulled it across her trembling form, respectfully averting his eyes. As he helped Raelynn stand to her feet, his eyes widened as countless more bruises and marks made themselves visible, tiny splotches of smooth brown skin barely surviving. These people had clearly put her through a very long, thorough beating, and it was evident that they were in no means hoping to show mercy. No, they wanted her dead. Raiden had teleported into the SF ship and rushed her to the infirmary room. People cleared the way immediately and knew better than to question his sudden appearance as he brushed past them while carrying the barely conscious woman to a bed near the back. He knew the Kombatants would be able to handle themselves well, so he stayed and began the healing process.

It was during this time he realized that Raelynn was no mere mortal, but a half god created by the hands of Cetrion. While it was difficult at first for him to fully trust her said intentions due to her creator's betrayal upon the Elder Gods, he had seen her heart's purity during the mission. The thunder god knew that she was making the best of efforts to redeem herself of past mistakes, and Liu Kang recognized this as well. A twinge of concern fell upon him just then as he knew that she still had much she needed to recover from. Whether she would eventually open up to him or not didn't matter, he would be patient and assist her as best as he could.

Raelynn took a seat upon the thick wooden rail and swung her legs over to face the bloody depths of Netherrealm's ocean. She wasn't afraid of falling nor coming across any odd sea creatures knowing that she had flying abilities, but of course she also wasn't dumb enough to try and test her strength or reflexes. A heavy sigh escaped her lips as she looked on at the overlapping waves, allowing her mind to space out and roam. Her fingers tapped on the rail in a rhythmic pattern, and she suddenly was reminded of something. Her hands came together and moved in a circular motion, stretching further until the form of her solar powers had become a guitar. She clutched the neck and hugged the body of the instrument under her other arm smiling to herself.

Upon visiting the islands of the Pacific in the past, she had learned about the aspect of music through vocals and tools that produced a pleasant audio. The demigoddess found that these brought her a sense of peace and tranquility, and immediately she wanted to learn the ways of this fascinating revelation. What came as an interest to her in the beauty of music was the endless techniques for a new sound, new sensations, new reactions, and day by day, there was always the creation or discovery of another. She allowed her fingers to delicately pluck and strum a mix of chords, a tingle settling in her chest at the euphoria beginning to wash over her. Her hands moved on their own accord, finding a steady tempo and following a pattern with an occasional switch. The nerves that built up in the pit of her stomach had eventually disappeared into wisps of nothingness. Her eyes began to slowly close and she hummed quietly wanting no attention to be drawn to the back of the ship. It seemed to work decently, until-

"Wow, you're part god and a singer? Gotta say I'm definitely jealous."

The woman’s fingers froze in place already in position to strum a new chord. She craned her neck just enough to glance over her shoulder at the intruder, already knowing it who it was. “My life is nothing to be envious of, Specialist Briggs.”

Raelynn heard footsteps tread closer and tapped on her guitar. The younger woman climbed onto the rail and threw a leg over the other. They sat for a moment in silence, staring off at the deep scarlet waters swishing and rolling about. “I owe you an apology, Specialist.”

Jacqui’s eyebrow quirked and her eyes fell upon the half god. Raelynn took her silence as a sign to continue. “I apologize for my behavior towards you and your friends throughout most of the mission. Even after I had caused harm upon your lives and nearly killed your fiancé, you still ensured trust in me. That I could never understand, but-"

"It wasn't easy." The half goddess shifted her attention to the soldier. Her face was impassive as she watched the waves. Raelynn couldn't tell if her expression was a good or bad thing, but she decided against trying to get her hopes up. A great deal (if not all) of her acts under Cetrion were cruel and groundless, and she held no anguish up until the time she had to come face to face with the truth of her doings. It tore her day and night, and meeting Hajoon had her convinced that she would be able to leave the life of corruption far behind and start fresh. Of course, the facts couldn't be hidden forever, and the half goddess found herself back in the deep hole of falsehood, surrounded with nothing but fabricated offers to a better life. She scoffed mentally. That opportunity was officially closed off to her. It seemed as though disaster was always a few steps away, eager to ruin her chances at something sound, and risking it a third time was nowhere near appealing.

"There were many instances where I questioned why the Chosen One defended you to such an extent, especially after it was SF that provided for your recovery." Jacqui's voice had brought her out of her thoughts. "Trust me, I was beyond ready to blast a hole or two through your head a hell lot of times." She paused. "But spending time with Haru and hearing your whole deal...I understood you." Raelynn's brows raised slightly, not expecting such a considerate response.

"I couldn't imagine a life finding out that the one who was supposed to be my caretaker, my protector, my safe haven, was actually the one who robbed me of all that. My mother..." Her words trailed off and she peered down into her lap. She tightened her jaw and bit her lip to keep from releasing the tears awaiting just behind her eyes. Raelynn almost reached her hand out in an effort of comfort but stopped, not wanting to ruin the intimacy in the moment. Jacqui lifted her head and continued. "Man, it would kill me if she'd ever done something like that...growing up believing that everything was all good and sweet, and everyone just hated her for doing what I thought was the right thing, thinkin' it was my own folks who were the crooks trynna steal me away and take my power from me..." She scoffed. "Seein' my dad as a revenant then manipulated by Kronika was betrayal enough, and it hurt like hell. Point is, I realized that you truly had no malice in you. You were just takin' orders and tryin' to keep your mother—uh, Cetrion, happy."

And it was true. Raelynn trusted completely in the virtue goddess as any child would their guardian. She worked vigorously in carrying out the Elder Goddess' wishes, longing to eventually gain any sort of praise or affection, but it was rare that those occurrences came to past. Most of her upbringing revolved around unanswered questions and the constant urge to do better, trying at all costs to win approval. But like a fool, she allowed her heart to get the best of her, put her through the worst of hells just to seek out a foolish desire that would never be anything close to genuine. That's what messed her up in the first place, and she couldn't—no, would not dare to do something as stupid as that again. It was only her and Haru. Nobody else.

"I am...appreciative of your understanding, Ms. Briggs," Raelynn spoke after a long moment of silence. "You and your comrades are owed a huge debt on my behalf."

Jacqui chuckled and shook her head, then turned to look at the demigoddess. "You're damn right we are!" The two women shared a laugh on the rail. "Actually, I believe there is a way to pay back this debt."

"How so?"

"Well, Takeda and I's wedding was put on pause due to this whole mission, and it cost a lot to find decent live music. Cassie offered, but we're trying to have a simple proper wedding, not a drunk karaoke session. And you have the voice of an angel—well, a god in your case. If you can strum a few chords and sing a few notes for a few hours, I'll consider you free of deficit."

Raelynn cocked her head and raised a brow. "That's...that's all?" She figured the woman would request of something more extravagant, like a prolonged lifespan or giving her supernatural abilities. Jaqui nodded and crossed her arms awaiting an answer.

"I...very well, Ms. Br-"

"Jacqui. That formality stuff is weird if it's not comin' from General Blade." The demigoddess was taken by surprise again. She gave a single nod and looked on at the waves which now fell into to a more mellow and calm pattern.

Perhaps it wasn't just Haru and her against the world. Every person aboard had their story, their differences, their fall outs, but they were able to cast it all aside at an effort for peace upon a world that did almost nothing for them in return. Some aspects of the Earthrealm were odd, she thought. It was going to take a lot of time to get used to these people, but maybe, just maybe...

There was a sense of hope.

[gloves94]

Sunburn [Prince Zuko] 6

Warnings: None   Rating: PG-13   Pairings: Zuko/OC   Summary:  “You have everything you’ve ever wanted.” “No.” He said softly. “Not everything…”  His golden eyes looked at her with a melting intensity she had never witnessed before. “I guess not.” She responded with glassy eyes as tears welled up threatening to break the dam of her eyes.

My fanfiction: M A S T E R L I S T

'Phew, that had been a close one,' Tsai thought exhausted as she returned to the ship.

She had returned to meet Admiral Zhao in record time. It appeared he didn't suspect a thing. Perhaps it was the wine? He talked about his glory and how he expected to send a fill written transcript of his Avatar capture speech to the Fire Lord himself tomorrow. It was when he got too close for comfort that she prayed somebody would interrupt and her prayers were answered.

"Admiral Zhao!" A soldier sprinted into the room. "It's the Avatar!" He shouted in an alarmed tone.

xxx

She took advantage of this distraction and hauled her ass back to the ship. Exhausted, praying that the Avatar had made it out and that she had made the right call in trusting the Blue Spirit.

xxx

A couple of days later Iroh, Prince Zuko and Tsai sat before a tea table in Iroh's room. Zuko had been behaving extremely weird since the night that Tsai had gone away to rescue the Avatar. She wondered if he knew- if he suspected of her, but there was no way in hell he would've known. She had been fast. Subtle too having even made it to the music night to hear Iroh play the trombone and listen to the Lieutenant's love song.

There was absolutely no way he knew.

The three currently sat in the upper deck dinning chamber. The private room which the three shared their meals. It was decorated with two long fire nation banners on the walls, several candles and a figure of a red dragon's head under the horizontal window on the wall.

Tsai figured even Iroh had noticed the prince's off behavior.

"See Prince Zuko, a moment of quiet is good for your mental well-being," Iroh said after taking a most well enjoyed sip of ginseng tea. Tsai simply smiled at the older man and turned to pour some tea on the prince's cup. She watched him with a curious expression as he took a sip of it. However he stopped before and looked at her with suspicion. A nervous smile carved her face as she made eye contact with him. At the same time the ship was suddenly jerked causing the tea to slosh out of the cup and soak all of the prince's face and hair.

Tsai failed to hold in her laughter and laughed loudly. Zuko growled out in frustration and she could swear she could see the tea evaporating from his forehead. 'Now what?' He leapt to his feet and stomped out of the room into the main deck, the other two followed.

"Woah!" the girl starred in awe at a large beast that had just boarded the ship. A young dark haired woman rode the mighty beast to the deck.

"Get back!" She barked at the crew of fire benders that were ready to attack. "We're after a stowaway," she explained cutting to the chase.

"There are no stowaways on my ship. None besides this one," he added the last part in a lower tone and glared at the auburn haired girl. "Hey!" She protested crossing her arms over her chest.

It took that creature a second to rip the floor of the deck and sniffing loudly stuck its head inside the hole. To everyone's surprise an injured man climbed out of the hole and ran for his life. The beast opened its mouth and whipped its tongue striking the stowaway. The man then collapsed frozen stuff with a horrified expression on his face.

"He's paralyzed," Zuko muttered shocked.

"It's only temporary," The woman stated as she effortlessly hauled the stowaway over her shoulder. "The toxins will wear off in about an hour," she explained. "But by then, he'll be in jail and I'll have my money." She walked over to the beast her hips swaying slightly as she tossed the man onto the beasts back cooly.

"It's a shirshu, isn't is?" Tsai suddenly spoke, her eyebrows arched in surprise. "I've read about them, never seen one in person. Hard to come by in the wilderness. Even harder tamed. Must've cost a pretty penny," she mused tapping on her cheek in surprise. Zuko looked at him with his eyes narrowed. "What? I've read every encyclopedia in the library. I know a thing or two," she shrugged.

"Well, I'm impressed," Iroh stated as the three watched the woman crack her whip and bolt off the ship racing down the docks to the jail. Tsai almost ran to the edge of the rail and leaned against it. She didn't know if Iroh was impressed by the beast or by the woman.

"She's so cool," Tsai blurted in awe. "Very impressed," Iroh said with a nasty smirk as he stroked his beard thoughtfully.

Zuko flashed both of them a disturbed look, the one he gave his uncle was borderline one of disgust.

"Are you two thinking what I'm thinking?" She turned to look at the two fire benders standing next to her excited. "She's just what we need!" The girl exclaimed slapping her fist against her open palm.

"Ho!" Iroh let out a lecherous laugh which showed that they were both clearly not thinking the same thing. The other two ignored this.

"She can help us track the Avatar! Only problem is, we don't have anything that smells like him," she finished dead beat. Zuko was silent for a moment.

"I might have something."

xxx

"Why are you even coming with?" Zuko commented at Tsai's presence as they docked the ship and prepared to go look for the mysterious woman. "I can be of help," she chirped. "You'll only get in the way if there's a confrontation," he spat. His tone remained firm but his eyes darted to read her expression. He was becoming desperate to learn her secret, what she was capable off.

He still couldn't believe that this dork had been the same person to threaten to turn him into mush the other night. He looked at her eyes right now, it was quite the contrast compared to the apathetic irises that he had seen the other night. He was baiting her, hoping she would reval what dangerous skills she possessed. Instead she scoffed before a grin grew across her features.

"You're cute when you're worried" She poked his face childishly.

He swatted her hand away annoyed.

Why was she hiding her skills? This made him wonder if she was hiding anything else. What were her true motives?

He recalled the scars of conflicts on the walls of the hallway. The deep slashes that scarred the walls of the compound. The blood. The helmets lamely rolling around the floor and she had done all of it without a weapon or a single scratch on her.

How on Earth had she done it? He had seen her hands before. They were scarless, soft looking and always perfectly polished with dark varnish.

"No," the other snapped. "I don't want you to compromise the mission," he retorted.

Some moments later after poking around asking questions in local markets and temples the trio headed to the seediest looking tavern off the docks of the Mo Ce Sea where it was rumored that the bounty hunter usually lounged.

"Out of my way!" The prince barked already annoyed as he parted a sea of people out of his way, "Step aside, filth!"

"He means no offense!" Iroh apologized to the thugs in the room sheepishly. "I am certain you bathe regularly."

The stench made his statement doubtful. They crossed the dark pub until reaching a table at the end where the dark haired woman was arm-wrestling a man that appeared to be twice her size.

Tsai tried to play it cool, yet failed and squeaked out a fangirling "She's so cool!" She turned her embarrassed face away to hide her growing blush. Zuko rolled his eyes at this. "I need to talk to you!" The banished prince stated loudly, his narrowed eyes glared at the woman.

"Well, if it isn't my new friends, Angry Boy and Uncle Lazy," she commented as she eyed the odd trio. 'Do I get a nickname?' The girl didn't realized she had actually said that out loud. "Oh hon," she shook her head slightly. "You are way to pretty for him," she scoffed at Zuko. "I'd run if I were you."

'She thinks I'm pretty,' the other swooned with a dumb fan girl expression on her face.

"She's not my girlfriend!" Zuko shouted glaring. Iroh couldn't help but chuckle. Way too distracted by the compliment Tsai ignored this interaction.

She did all this while engaged in an arm wrestling game. It was then that she slammed the large man's monstrous hand down against the table. The crowds cheered, money was tossed on the table.

'So cool!'

Once again- Tsai missed part of the conversation.

"Name's June," she introduced herself. Snapping the colonial girl out of her thoughts.

"I need you to find someone," Zuko said as they made their way outside the stinking pub. It was then that he pulled up a woman's necklace. More specifically a water tribe necklace. One of the ones water benders customary use to propose in their tribes.

"What happened," June drawled out, her voice dropping with sarcasm as she leaned against her shirshu with her arms crossed over her chest. "Your ex-girlfriend run off on you?"

"It's not the girl I'm after," Zuko responded cooly. "It's the bald monk she's traveling with."

"Whatever you say," June shrugged.

Moments later they were heading out of the tavern.

"You got it!" Iroh laughed merrily. It sounded as if a deal had just been made.

"Get on!" June instructed as she grabbed the necklace from Zuko once outside as they stood around the shirshu. Tsai had never seen Iroh move so fast as he eagerly climbed in a spot in the saddle where he would get to sit behind June. He turned to look at the two teenagers expectantly.

"We have to stop by my ship first. She'll only get in the way," Zuko said referring to his uncle's guest. "No I won't!" She protested childishly.

"Can't do that Angry Boy," June drawled out clicking her tongue. "Once Nyla has the scent, she has to follow it. There are no pit-stops." She explained. "Now get on!"

Zuko climbed on and sat behind his Uncle. With no choice Tsai sat behind him.

Nyla was practically salivating at the human scent of the necklace. "Hold on tight!" June warned before cracking her whip. With a single crack the beast lunged forward as the hunt began.

"Woah!" Tsai instinctively wrapper her arms around the prince holding on tightly. "Tsai! Get your hands off me!" He protested. The feeling of her body being pressed against his, her arms around his chest made him feel uncomfortably hot. "I'm going to fall off!" Her grip around him tightened. "See? This is what I meant when I said you'd get in the way!" The other shot back as the two bickered back and forth.

June rolled her eyes. People screamed and fled in panic as the giant beastly shirshu leapt over their homes buildings, from roof to roof racing through the village. It was almost like riding a rollercoaster. Tsai yelped when Nyla suddenly came to a jerking stop almost falling off the saddle, she tightened her grip around the prince and his hand gripped her arm tightly. She wouldn't be surprised if he was asphyxiating. It was then that they suddenly came to a halt outside of temple with warm hues. Outside of it stood an older woman with a calm expression on her features. It was almost as if she had been expecting them.

"Why are we stopping?" Zuko demanded in annoyance. "She must've spent a lot of time here," June explained flatly. "We have no time for this!" he snapped impatiently.

The older woman that was standing outside suddenly approached the shirshu and addressed Iroh with a hand on her hips. She wore ochre colored robes which were the same color to the ones Tsai usually wore. She wore a golden crown with a circular symbol at the center.

"Care to hear your fortune, handsome?" She offered in a flirtatious tone and the man smiled down at her. "At my age, there's only one big surprise left," Iroh replied serenely with a smile, "And I'd just as soon leave it mysterious."

Feeling nauseous Tsai sighed and buried her green face on the prince's shoulder. He immediately stiffened and was about to complain when the lady turned to them.

"What about you two love doves? Care to know the gender of your firstborn? The answer might surprise you." She offered gently with a small smile.

Zuko quickly released his grip from Tsai's arm as if it had burned him. He hadn't realized he was still holding on. The girl's arms were still wrapped around his torso. However her grip was now weaker and looser. "For the last time!" Zuko roared with all of his might his face burning a bright shade of red. "She is NOT my girlfriend!" He roared so loud that a flock of birds in a nearby stormed away. He said it so loud and with so much rage that Tsai wouldn't have been surprised if the people in the Southern Water Tribe had heard him. She managed to utter a zombie like groan.

"I think I'm going to be sick," she moaned out sickly feeling the nausea creeping on her.

Some time later after several ups and downs of searching for the damn Avatar Nyla stopped at the nunnery Abbey. It was then that the perfume stench became too powerful.

"I'm going to throw up," she uttered.

"That's it. Off the beast!" Zuko ordered but she had already beat him to the punch sliding off Nyla.

"Tsai!" Iroh asked concerned.

"I-I don't feel well," she said attempting to swallow up the vomit that was creeping up her throat. "Just come back for me later. I'll be waiting right here," she sighed as she leaned against one of the pale yellow walls of the abbey and slid down it to her bottom.

"See! This is what I meant when I said you'd get in the way!" Zuko exclaimed.

"Next time you try riding in the back of a shirshu!" She shot back.

"Alright, enough flirting you too. We've got an Avatar to catch!" June cracked her whip. And just like that we were off.

Some moments later Tsai was leaning over a bush in one of the edges of the Abbey puking her guts out. "Last... Time... I ride a..." She gurgled violently. "A shirshu."

The nuns were more than kind. They offered some water and stale bread and offered her a seat under a shaded bench. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. It was almost peaceful and those lovely perfume scents. She looked up at the skies and wondered if it would be nightfall by the time the group returned back for her.

It was then that the nun she identified as the superior one entered the abbey with a young boy that had a blue arrow tattooed down his forehead.

'Huh, well I'll be damned,' she let out a low whistle. 'Damn Avatar literally just strolled in.'

Part of her wondered if she was hallucinating. Their eyes met and Aang's went wide. Fast as the wind he was standing in front of her before she could even react. Maybe the rumors were true and he really was as fast as the wind.

"It's you!" He exclaimed.

Aang looked at her carefully. It had definitely been the lady in disguise that had rescued him from that night when he had been captured by Admiral Zhao. The night of the Blue Spirit.

"You rescued me!"

Instead of wearing the dark make up from that night, her eyes were made up with a light brown eyeshadow. Lips a shade of peony pink, except her skin was paler than it had been that night. Aang thought she looked unwell, almost sick.

"It's me," she mused with a lazy smile. "I-I don't even know your name!" He spoke rapidly. "Thank you," he bowed down slightly out of respect.

"Avatar," She spoke after a moment unsure of how to address him.

The gears in her head turned slowly as she processed what she could do. Could she fight the Avatar down? Tie him up somehow and wait for Zuko to get back? She wondered if she could persuade him to come with them peacefully? Or maybe- just maybe he could help her...

"I believe all citizens of the Fire Nation should be treated equally." She smiled after a moment. "Fire and earth benders as well as non benders."

"Fire Nation?" His eyebrows went up in surprise his body leaned back as he his gut instinct suddenly  warned him that this person was dangerous. It was Tsai's turn to take a bow before him. "Which is why I with the most respect have to ask you to come with me."

Aang was shocked. He was about to speak when the wooden door to the abbey was suddenly wrecked as Nyla stormed in with Iroh, Zuko and two prisoners.

"There he is!" Zuko exclaimed pointing a finger at the airbender. Nyla charged forward ready to strike. The Avatar using a glider of sorts leapt up into the air and began flying in sharp circles. Tsai continued calmly sipping on her water witnessing the madness unfold. She knew this wasn't her fight.

She had already done what she could. Now it was up to Zuko to capture him.

Nyla charged toward the Avatar when a massive Flying Bison tackled it down. Two of the nuns suddenly dragged two bodies to rest next to where she was sitting.

"Sup," she retorted casually still sipping her beverage. The two wore Water Tribes robes, had dark hair, dark skin and brown hair with striking blue eyes. The two flashed her an odd look. A battle unfolded between Zuko and the Avatar and there was a massive explosion in which both flew up to opposite rooftops. June had been hit and lay unconscious on the floor before Iroh patted her face awake and she rose up to the occasion and fought. Iroh stood there feeling rather pleased with himself.

"Oh, there you are Tsai. Feeling better?" he asked casually. As if a massive fight wasn't unfolding before them. The girl looked at the prince who looked like he was really struggling. Then again, it was him, June and Nyla against the Avatar. She assumed they would be able to carry their own weight in this fight. "Should we do something?" She asked not removing her eyes from the fighting prince. Iroh looked pensive for a moment. "Actually-" he began. "let's go smell some perfumes," he said with a slight smile.

Iroh and Tsai stood on the sidelines as they critiqued, tried and smelt some of the exquisite perfumes that the abbey produced. "Hint of freesia, I like this one," she said sniffing a small white bottle. Iroh held a bottle he liked himself. Both made a sly eye contact sharing the same thought before hiding the bottle inside of their sleeves and laughing.

The fight continued. When suddenly barrels of perfume were poured all over the abbey. One of the prisoners that Zuko had brought with the group on top of Nyla, the girl wearing the Water Tribe clothes was a water bender. She bended the water and made it rain a powerful stench of perfume which clogged Nyla's nose.

  "The Shirshu! It's been blinded!"

Nyla went off the hook. It's whipped tongue suddenly snapped and accidentally struck Prince Zuko who collapsed with a gasp of surprise.

June jumped from the saddle in an attempt to soothe her creature which failed and in a swing of its head the shirshu lashed out at its master and struck her before fleeing into the wilderness.

"June! No!" Iroh cried out dramatically as he hurried forward to catch the paralyzed woman in his arms, both of the collapsing to the ground. Tsai raised an eyebrow 'Really?' The edge of her eye twitched.

From across the abbey she saw the Avatar embrace his teammates. He looked at her from a distance and their eyes once again met. It was then that Aang realized that she was with them. She was a part of the Fire Nation. She was the enemy. She weighted her options. What was right and what was wrong. Should she attempt to go after them?

She stood back and nodded her head down, slightest of smiles on her face. He did not return it.   And just like that, the Avatar escaped once again.

This time Tsai approached the paralyzed prince, his uncle and the bounty hunter.

"Uncle?" Zuko muttered looking at his uncle who was lying next to him with June lying on top of him, "I didn't see you get hit with the tongue."

"Shhh.... Iroh shushed him, putting his finger to his lips before putting his hand back down and reclosing his eyes with a smile of pure bliss on his face.

June's eyes snapped open as glared at Iroh angrily.

"Well, well, well, looks like this time I'm the one with the upper hand," Tsai teased both hands on her hips. "I wonder if I should go take a stroll in the park or get some help?" She laughed.

xxxxx

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CHAPTER MASTERLIST

[is0gild]

Ice Cream and Fire Oven Pizza - Chapter 19

Pairing: Elsa x Lea/Axel || Side Pairing: Riku x OC

Summary: Modern AU. She's an introvert ball of nerves who works at Ice Palace, a mall food court ice cream shop. He's the outgoing, sassy goofball who works at the Pizza Planet across the way. Hilarity, snark, and fluffy romcom hijinks ensue.

Word Count: 9,165

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

Credit for super friggin’ cute and super friggin’ amazing cover art goes to the super friggin’ talented ky-jane here on tumblr!

Neverland, as I was currently discovering, was a huge indoor playground at the Dusk Town Center mall. A place where children never had to grow up, or so its big overhead sign boasted. Its vast range of diversions for the little ones included such attractions as a jungle gym in the shape of a large comical skull, a huge green plastic alligator that had a slide built into its long back, and monkey bars supported at either end by large, spooky prop trees. Off in one corner, there were even synthetic, cute yet culturally problematic teepees for the tiny tots to crawl around and hide in. But its crowning jewel seemed to be the kiddie train that ran along the tracks circling the entire play area. Each of its carts were actually little pirate ships that could fit one child in it, maybe two if they were really little.

Since the playground was in the middle of a wide open mall walkway, many stores surrounded it, such as an antique shop by the name of Cave of Wonders. Beyond the rusty brass lamps in its window and past an old, tacky purple carpet draping off a shelf, a friendly young woman with long black hair tied back into a two-sectioned ponytail and wearing a turquoise crop top could be seen running the counter.

Next door to that was Game-A-Saurus Rex, a video game store sporting a green t-rex mascot as part of its logo. An absolute giant of an employee with messy brown hair was currently setting up a display pyramid but his meaty, clumsy hands accidentally knocked it over, wrecking it. I got the feeling this wasn't the first time from the look of being one hundred percent done he was receiving from his silver haired coworker with mismatched eyes.

Neighboring them, I was a bit surprised to discover there was even an Esmerelda's Secrets here as well, a… ahem, lingerie store, to use a more PG term. I found its location so near to the play area to be a bit of a questionable mall layout choice.

I sighed, paper bag lunch crinkling in my grip as I glanced around.

Where was he?

"Are you sure this is where he told you he wanted to meet up?" Kristoff asked beside me, his eyes scanning about as well. Thankfully, he'd forgiven me by now for the minor phone-hurling fiasco and we were back on speaking terms again.

"Positive," I fished my mobile out of my pocket with my free hand, rereading Lea's text asking me to head to Neverland once my lunch break had started.

Since I'd never heard of it before, I'd asked Kristoff (him being the closest person at hand since he'd been working the Ice Palace registers with me) if he'd known what it was. I figured he could at least point me in the right direction, which would be faster than looking at a mall directory. Instead, since he was getting off shift the same time I was going on lunch, he'd offered to walk me there, saying it was on his way anyway.

But now here we were and a certain redhead was nowhere to be seen.

"Bah, I'm sure he'll turn up any second now," Kristoff shrugged off with a laugh. I said nothing, just continued to frown down at my phone before raising my eyes to take another look around. Shoving one of his hands into his pocket while he used the other to ruffle the hair at the back of his head, Kristoff said, "So… your sister…"

"Anna? What about her?" I muttered distractedly, gaze still jumping from face to unfamiliar face. Come on, Lea was a friggin' mountain with hair like a beacon that could light a path home for even the most wayward of lost ships. The guy should have been sticking out like a sore thumb.

He pursed his lips to one side, slightly widened eyes darting about now. "She's… well, she's really… neat." I blinked, slowly looking over at him now. He stiffened, then gave a weak chuckle, "Did I say neat? Not neat, I meant, ah… pretty!" His face blanched. "Pretty… pretty, pretty swell, that is! Yeah, a real bangarang," insert his wince here, "gal that, uh... that's really, er…"

Annnnnd now he was blushing. What was with him, anyway? It was so unlike him to be getting all tongue-tied and-

Oh.

Oh dear. I knew what this was.

Someone had a crush.

Ugh, why did I have to be the one to break his heart by telling him my sister was already in a relationship?

"...anyway," his voice cracked and he coughed, beating a fist to his chest before trying again. "Anyway, what I'm trying to say, or… rather ask is... would you know if, ah… is... is she seeing any-" his idly wandering gaze landed on something past me and he froze, words dying on his tongue. Then his eyelids drooped. "...I think I found your boyfriend."

My brow furrowed at the face he was making before I turned on my heel, following his gaze.

I heard them before I saw them. Cheerful whoops and hollers echoing from the plastic tunnel over the railroad tracks, heralding the emerging train of pirate ships. Then there they were: Lea and Roxas, taking up a full boat each as the locomotive chugged along, their hands thrown up high over their heads as they cackled in almost maniac glee. The two kids in the cart behind them - a carrot top boy in a green cap embroidered with a red feather logo and a little blonde girl wearing toy fairy wings - were giving them funny looks.

I spluttered, my fingers shooting up to smother and hide the grin I was fighting. This was behavior I did not want to encourage.

There he was, ladies and gentlemen. My bad-boy boyfriend in all his glory.

I hope the Duke's spy wasn't here to witness this.

Scratch that, I'd rather no one were here to witness this.

"Those goddamn morons have been at this for over ten minutes now," I heard a grumble from a familiar voice close by. I looked to my right to discover Xion standing there, watching them with a scowl and one eye twitching. As the train drew near, she called out flatly, "Oh yeah, looking real classy there, guys!"

"We're posh as fuck!" Lea replied smugly with a pinky raised, heedless of what nearby young and impressionable ears might overhear. Then his eyes drifted past her to notice me for the first time. His already beaming face did the impossible and brightened even further. As his little pirate ship choo-chooed its way past us, he cried out, "There you are, El! 'Bout time! We're celebrating!"

"El? Who's El? No, you must have me mistaken for someone else. I don't know you," I shook my head, taking a step back. "Quick, let's get out of here," I hissed to Kristoff, snatching his arm with one hand and using the other to hide my face as I tried to make a hasty retreat.

"Oh-ho, no ya don't! You're not getting away that easily!" I heard Lea laugh behind me. I hazarded a quick glance over my shoulder to see him struggling to get out of the cart - he was wedged in there pretty good, seeing as how those boats were never meant to withstand a man of his considerable stature. However, he finally managed to wiggle himself free and jump off the moving kiddie train, stumbling over the railing surrounding it and leaving poor Roxas behind looking quite distraught at having been abandoned.

Then he was charging towards me and I spun around to face him, defensively throwing my hands up in front of me. "Got ya!" he declared triumphantly, snagging me by the waist, my arms instinctively going to hug his neck as he lifted me up and spun me around a couple times.

What was even happening?

"Right," Kristoff said. Don't ask me how, but I could distinctly hear the eyeroll in his voice. "I think I'm gonna go now."

He walked off and I frowned after him as Lea put me back down, though his arms still kept me trapped against him. Then I shrugged. Kristoff's wee crush would have to be a problem for another day. Looking up at Lea, I shook my head with a barely suppressed smile, "What has you so giddy?"

"I got my test grade back today," he chirped, nuzzling his nose to mine for all the crowded mall to see.

"Your test?" I cocked my head at him. Then it clicked. "Oh, the one I helped you study for? You passed?"

"Passed nothing, I aced that sucker! Made it my bitch and it was all thanks to you!" And with that, he was hoisting me up for another twirl.

"Dude, what the hell?!" a shout suddenly rang out across the mall before Roxas came bursting out of the press of shoppers, sneakers screeching to a halt in front of us as he glared at Lea. "Can't believe you just ditched me like that! I looked like a total dumbass riding that thing all by myself!"

"Oh sure," Xion deadpanned at his side, "cuz you looked like a regular Einstein before as a grown-ass man riding around in the widdle choo-choo train with another grown-ass man."

Roxas crossed his arms and stuck his nose up in the air with a harrumph. "You're just jelly cuz we didn't invite you."

She scoffed, "You didn't invite me cuz I turned you guys down the last ten times you tried to drag me onto that dumb thing because I didn't want to look stupid."

"Your face looks stupid!"

Xion lunged at him, but Lea had already put me down and was snagging them both by the scruff of their shirt collars, dragging them apart from each other. He sighed, "Kiddos, please, would you start acting like the grown-ups that you are?"

Said the adult man who'd just been joyriding in the kiddie train.

Seriously, how were these three even college students? They all acted like a bunch of preschoolers.

"Ha, fat chance with this dope," Xion snerked, reaching across to flick Roxas in the forehead.

"Why you-" he broke free of Lea's grasp. Xion gasped and managed to squirm loose herself, bolting and squealing with laughter as she disappeared into the crowd, Roxas hot on her heels.

"Oi, kids these days. I give up," Lea grumbled, shaking his head and tossing his hands up in defeat. "Now where were we?" Looking back at me, his eyes lit up. "Ah yes," he bent forward, bringing us nose to nose with a tiny smirk, "my reward."

Both eyebrows shot up my forehead and I staggered back a bit. "Your… reward?"

"Mm-hm!" he nodded, grin twitching wider. "For kicking that test's ass, I get a reward! It's standard girlfriend protocol."

I blinked, "...it is?"

"Didn't ya read your dating handbook?"

...there's a handbook?!

Wait. No. That was just a joke.

And wishful thinking on my part.

Because I mean, seriously, how much easier would my life be right now if I could consult a handbook?

That aside, I had to get back to the matter at hand: some kind of reward for Lea. Which was my duty as the girlfriend. Apparently. What did that even entail? What was it supposed to be? What was I supposed to do? My face paled and my hands clenched. This was too much responsibility to be thrust onto me all of a sudden! What, was I supposed to buy him something? Or… maybe this was this another PDA situation? I mean, I hadn't made a move in that department since the roller rink a couple days ago. If tripping and crashing into him even counted. Which, personally, I was still chalking up as one for the win column. Had to take my small victories wherever I could! That said… perhaps it was high time I gave it another go?

Yes. Okay. I was going to do this. This… I was going to do.

My gaze hardened and my nostrils flared slightly as I started taking deep, sharp breaths, psyching myself up.

I got this. No more putting it off. Be strong! Be brave! Carpe diem! Seize the day! Grab the bull by the horns! Strike while the iron's hot!

Lea snerked, straightening up, "Woah, El, your face! Relax! I'm kidding! Just teasing ya like I always-"

YOLO!

I dropped my lunch bag, grabbed his head in both hands, yanked him down and kissed him.

...on the nose.

Way to bury the lead there, I know.

But hey, it still counted! Let me have this!

I held it for the space of a few thundering heartbeats before I pulled back, releasing his face and doing my best to ignore the slight jitters I felt from the adrenaline surge.

Lea was stock-still and just giving me a blank, wide-eyed stare.

Huh… not the reaction I was expecting.

A few long seconds ticked by where nothing happened. My eyes darted about nervously. Then I slowly, awkwardly picked my lunch sack back up off the floor. And still nothing from him. Nada. Not one peep.

Should… should I say something?

That's when he jolted upright (startling me half to death, I might add) and brought both his hands up to cup his nose, spinning around so his back was to me now.

Okay, really, really not the reaction I was expecting. At all. Just what-

Then it hit me.

I hadn't asked his permission first! And after he'd been so careful with me all this time too! Apparently I couldn't even return the favor! Fudge, this was like the Kissident all over again. Except worse! At least then, it'd been an accident. This time I'd done it on purpose! This was premeditated! Not to mention this now made me a repeat offender! A… a serial kisser! Would my reign of smooching terror never cease?

Anxiety eating up at me now like a swarm of angry ants in the pit of my stomach, I bit down on my bottom lip and took a hesitant step forward. "Lea?" I asked, my voice small. "Did I do something wrong or-"

"Nope! No, it was good. Really, really good," he said quickly, voice tight and muffled still by his hands. Then I heard him puff out a slow breath, watched his arms fall to his sides and he whipped around towards me once more, huge smile splitting his face in two. "So good, in fact, it's high-five worthy. Whaddya say, wanna high-five? Let's high-five." He held his palm up in front of me. I wordlessly stared back at him, arching an eyebrow. He was being weird, even for him. And why was he talking so fast? He hastily dropped his hand, "Not high-five. Forget that. That's stupid. We should, uh… we should go. Wanna go? Let's go."

As he snagged my free hand in his and tugged me into a walk beside him, I tipped my head to the left and uncertainly gave him some side-eye. "...where are we going?"

Seemingly already recovered, his grip shifted to instead hook our pinkies together as he shot me a wink. "Where all couples sneak off to whenever they have a lil free time. Somewhere dark, secret and secluded so," here he raised his voice for all to hear over the mall hub-bub, "we can make out!"

My feet faltered and I stumbled, barely catching myself as my face spontaneously broke out into its best impersonation of a tomato. "M-make out?!"

He snorted, bending close to my ear and whispering, "Calm down, only said it for show. We'll just find some place to lay low until your lunch is over and let the gossip mill churn." Straightening back up to his full height, he beamed, "Sound good, my knuddelbärchen?" A crease formed between my eyebrows and he chuckled. "Go on, ask. Ya know ya want to."

I sighed, "And knuddelbärchen is…?"

"German for cuddle bear," he pinched my cheek.

"No."

"You can sleep on it, then get back to me."

I rolled my eyes but held my tongue as I continued to let him lead the way to wherever it was we were going. It wasn't long before we entered a part of the mall I was more familiar with and he turned us down the deserted wing that was under construction. Ah, back to the clocktower then, was it? So be it.

Once the locked door was picked and we were inside, I started to head for the stairs but he stopped me with a hand on my elbow. At my questioning look, he said, "Dunno where the kiddos disappeared off to. They may have beat us to the punch and could be up there already, which'll totally bust our whole fake make-out sesh. Better to just hide out down here instead."

"Alright," I nodded as he released my arm.

And there it was again. That strangeness that seemed to hang in the air whenever we were alone together now. Whenever we didn't have to put on the act of being in a relationship. I was now so used to him lacing our fingers together every chance he got that when he didn't this time, instead opting to stuff his hands into his pockets with a grin and a soft "heh," my own hand almost felt… slighted? Bereft? Sad? Could hands even feel sad? Well, whatever the hand equivalent of sadness was, it felt that.

There were a couple large, dusty crates stored in here with us at the bottom of the clocktower. I stepped over to one, gingerly dusting off the surface before setting my paper bag down on top of it. Then I cleared my throat and looked to him with a small, timid smile. "This whole rent-a-boyfriend thing is really becoming a full time job now, isn't it? Sorry… to be wasting your time like this. I'm sure there are better ways you'd be preferring to spend it rather than stuck here with me."

Lea blinked at me, then huffed out a breath of a laugh. "Hey, you already forgetting whose idea it was for us to steal away on our own like this? Ya got nothing to be sorry for. I like this, it's fun! 'Sides," he moved to stand in front of me, leaning one shoulder against the wooden support beam there that was holding up the decrepit old staircase above us, "it's not a waste. I'm a big fan of my El time. Love having any excuse to hang out with ya and have you all to myself."

Cue heart spasm.

Dropping my gaze and tugging my Ice Palace cap down to hide my warming cheeks, I zeroed in on opening my lunch bag with far more acute focus than was absolutely necessary. Let's see what Mama Rayne had packed for me today, inquiring minds were simply dying to know. To him, I just mumbled, "To each their own, I guess."

"So…" he reached a hand out, index finger flicking the bill of my hat back up so he could meet my eyes when he smirked, "...you kissed me."

All color drained from my face.

Crud. Was hoping this wouldn't come up.

"I'm sorry!" came bursting out of me.

His head rocked back before he snorted and sighed, "You apologize too much, ya know that? Fine, I'll bite. What're you sorry for now?"

"I should've asked if that was okay before I did it!" I took off my cap, wringing it between my hands. "I overstepped, I shouldn't have just assumed! I hope I didn't freak you out or make things awkward or uncomfortable or, or weird or-"

"Woah, woah, slow down," he chuckled, holding up his hands. "Ya got nothing to worry about. I was totally, one hundred and ten percent cool with it!"

My eyebrows knit together. "Really?" I frowned, absently setting the hat down on the box. "But you seemed so… I thought I might've upset you or-"

"Upset? Nah, not even a lil bit! Surprised, maybe, cuz I never in a million years expected you to, ah… heh…" he paused, pursing his lips to the right as he dragged his hand along the nape of his neck. Then he closed his eyes in a grin, "How 'bout this? This, right here, right now, is me giving you the okay to do whatever you want to me from now on in order to maintain your girlfriend cover. Anything goes, got it?"

Eyes growing round, I stammered, "A-anything?"

He couldn't be serious! Anything was a lot. Anything was… well, anything.

"Yup, anything! Don't hold back. Just feel free to go to town on me."

This was too much power. Do not want. Take it back.

"I, uh…" What does one even say to that? "O-okay… thanks?" Was this something I should be thanking him for? Seemed like a weird thing to thank him for. This whole discussion just seemed weird, period. Concentrating on my packed lunch once more, I pulled out a ziplock of baby carrots. "...I don't think I'll be, er… going to town on you any time soon though, but the offer is, ah…" Is what? "...appreciated?" Sure, let's go with that.

"Shame," Lea tsked under his breath, then snerked as his hand shot up to block the carrot I threw at him. "Kidding, kidding! Still, just know that door's always open, in case ya ever wanna put on a bit of a show for any audience we might have. I won't be bothered. Promise."

"I'll keep that in mind," I muttered, taking out a second carrot to nibble on as I averted my gaze. Was ready to talk about something else now.

"Still, fact of the matter remains," one corner of his lips curled up, "you kissed me."

Gah! Would he stop saying that already!

A soft harrumph. "Only on the nose."

"One lucky nose!" He hunched forward slightly, pointing at it, "I'll have you know I'm never gonna wash this puppy ever again."

I snorted, setting the ziplock down on the box and reaching back into the paper sack to see what other goodies it contained. "Be serious."

"I am! Wouldn't wanna lose the divine blessing you've bestowed upon it on this fine day!"

Biting back a smile now as I continued to root around in the bag, I shook my head. "Does this mean that you also haven't washed your lips since the-" I abruptly froze, eyes widening and mouth clamping shut.

There was a pause, then I could see out of my peripheral the slow cheshire grin spreading across Lea's face. "Go on, since the…?"

Since the Kissident, was what I'd been about to say.

I knew it.

He knew it.

But did I have the guts to actually power through and finish that sentence?

Frantic fingers grabbing the first thing they could out of the lunch sack, I shoved it into his face with a weak laugh, "Chocolate pudding cup?"

Nope. I sure as heck most certainly did not.

Elsa, Queen of the Skillful and Seamless Subject Change.

"Oo!" he chirped in delight, taking it. Well, he was easily distracted. That, or he was just being nice and letting me off the hook. Probably the latter. "A nose kiss and pudding? Big day!"

With a soft, relieved sigh through my nostrils, I fished out a plastic spoon to hand him as well. "Don't forget about the train ride too. Big day indeed… do you and Roxas do that often?"

Having already torn into it and taken a spoonful into his mouth, he swallowed. "Not really. Only for special occasions. Wouldn't wanna cheapen the experience."

My eyes crinkled. "Because it's already so sophisticated and highbrow to begin with," I said, forgoing the PB and J sandwich at the bottom of the bag for now and instead opting to pull out some string cheese. Removing the wrapper, I asked, "Passing an exam counts as a special occasion?"

"Only the hard as balls ones that can make or break my overall grade for the course," he shrugged, scooping out some more pudding and offering it to me, to which I just shook my head.

"Ah," I rested one hip against the crate, peeling off a thin strip of mozzarella and slipping it into my mouth. "How many years do you have left on your degree anyway?"

"Couple more. Though I hear if I'm a model student, they'll let me graduate early for good behavior."

"Don't think that's how it works," I hummed a low laugh. "Then after that… what was it again? ...a nice little ice cream shanty by the seashore, I believe?"

Lea grinned around his spoon, "Something like that."

Pulling off another strand, I hesitated with a slight frown. "...but why ice cream?" At his cocked head and raised eyebrows, I worried my lower lip between my teeth. How to phrase this? "...it's just been something I've been wondering about actually. What with your mother dropping you off at an ice cream shop before she, ah... split when you were so little, I would have thought it would just be a… a source of bad memories, is all."

He snorted, looking down at his spoon as he swirled it around in the chocolate goop. "S'not the ice cream's fault my deadbeat mom abandoned Saïx and me when we were kids. She's taken a lot from me, I won't let her take that too. 'Sides, also got a lotta good memories tied to ice cream. Fun times with friends and whatnot. It's nice that something so simple can bring a smile to people's faces and I just like the idea of being a part of that. Sounds silly, I know, but what can I say?" He thrust the now heavily pudding-laden utensil up high in the air, "I have a calling! And answer it I must!"

I brought a curled finger to my lips, hiding the tiny smile. "Some calling. You still haven't even guessed which one's my favorite yet."

"Told ya, it's a process," he stuck the spoon into his mouth, holding it there as he squinted thoughtfully. "Speaking of… lessee, what other flavors haven't come up yet… ah! Three Wishes?" he asked, pointing the plastic implement at me. Then he scoffed, "Yeah right. Way too gimmicky with all that blue cotton candy. It's trying too hard. Classy and effortless is more your speed."

My smile ticked wider as my fingers plucked further at the string cheese. "Are we still even talking about ice cream anymore?"

"Course! Trust me, I've got this down to a science. I know my shit."

"If you say so," I gave a soft snort. "You really have me at the edge of my seat here. I can't wait to see which one you finally land on."

"Me neither. I'm just as much on this journey as you are," he chuckled, tossing the now empty cup onto the crate alongside the paper bag. Propping one shoulder against the post again, he looked down and scratched his cheek. "...hey, so, ya free in a couple nights? Saïx's been wanting to meet my new lady friend and suggested we have you over for dinner."

Finishing the last of my own snack, I quirked an eyebrow at him. "He knows you have a lady friend?"

"Wasn't hard for him to guess since I've been out all night a lot recently, what with your couch being my new home away from home."

"Oh." My fingers reached for a tendril of my ponytail to twist as I mulled for a second. "Yeah, I suppose… I don't have any closing shifts coming up for a while, so I'm free for the next few nights. Just let me know when."

"Sweet! We can see this as a test run of sorts. Practice for the big weekend with your folks and-" he suddenly fell silent, head jerking to his right. I blinked, confused. Then I heard it too. This soft rattling coming from the doorknob - the telltale sounds of a lock being picked. "Crap! The kiddos! Hide," Lea hissed, grabbing my shoulders and shoving us both beneath the staircase, my back hitting the wall behind me.

The door burst open. I didn't so much see it since the stairs were now between me and it, blocking my line of sight, but I heard it along with the echoing laughter of two very familiar voices. As it slammed shut again and the staircase began to quake from feet running up it hard, I heard Xion ask, "Think we'll find them up there?"

"Probably." That was Roxas. I turned my head to the left, watching through the slats between the steps as his sneakers blurred past. "Giving each other tonsillectomies, no doubt."

My face heated as I realized they were talking about Lea and me.

But good news! Lea's plan was working. People thought we were off somewhere, er... shall we say, necking.

Or at the very least, those two thought so anyway.

I heard a snigger from Xion as her boots rushed past the gap not too far behind him. "Perfect. Let's scare them shitless."

They both cackled and tried to shush each other at the same time as I heard their thudding footsteps fade further and further away above us. Once I was certain they were gone, I puffed out the breath I'd been holding.

That's when I became aware of several things. Very, very aware.

Aware of the familiar feeling of Lea's eyes on me. Aware of how close we were. Of his grip still on my shoulders. Of my hands on his chest. Of the gentle thud of his heartbeat beneath my fingertips. Of his warm, spicy boy scent. Of his body pressed to mine, pinning me to the wall still from his rush just seconds ago to get us both out of sight. Of the fact that I could still sense his gaze on me.

Oh gosh, was there something on my face?

I slowly turned my head to look up at him and meet his eyes. He had that look in them again that I'd seen once or twice before. The one that made my insides twist and flip-flop.

Emergency! This is not a drill, people! Fetch the conceal-don't-feel armor and suit up, stat! I repeat, this is not a drill!

The slightest hint of a grin tugged at the corner of his lips and when he spoke, his voice was low. Barely above a whisper. "You know what would… really sell this make-out sesh? ...if right along here..." he ran the tip of his index finger along the side of my neck down to where it met my shoulder, so lightly I hardly felt it, his eyes following its trail the whole time, "...there was a hickey. Maybe two or three. Ya know… just for appearances, of course..."

I just stared at him for a second. Then two. Then I smiled, "That's a great idea!"

He looked taken aback, his gaze widening. "Wait, really?!"

"Of course! Did you bring any makeup with you?" I asked. He just gave me a blank look. "You know, like your guyliner. Do you have anything else? Something that could make the fake marks look convincing?"

He blinked a couple times. "Makeup… right… that's what I meant… heh..." his eyes darted to the left. "But shoot, you know what? Didn't bring any with me." A slow smirk stretching across his face now, he bent down to press his forehead to mine as his eyes hooded, "But hey... we could also always make 'em the old fashioned way."

Once more I stared, expression neutral.

Processing… processing…

Then my eyelids drooped. "...you're messing with me again, aren't you?"

Lea stiffened. Then he relaxed, straightening back up and bracing an elbow against the wall above my head, resting his brow to his forearm as his whole body shook with a soft chuckle. "Yup! Yup, you uh… you caught me alright! Totes was."

Conceal-don't-feel armor saves the day once again! If it hadn't been for that, my heart might have exploded in that situation.

Man, was I getting good at deflecting these little jokes of his now or what?

He shifted over and away from me, giving us both some breathing room now. "Do you think maybe we should go somewhere else?" I asked, my gaze drifting up the clocktower as I returned to the crate, repacking my lunch back into its bag and picking up my hat. Thank goodness the "kiddos" hadn't noticed this stuff before dashing upstairs. "Just so Xion and Roxas don't catch us down here?"

"Sure, good call. I gotta few other secret spots 'round this place we can hole up in until your lunch is over." He went to the door, pushing it open a crack so he could peek out.

"Okay," I nodded while waiting for him to make sure the coast was clear. Then I grinned. "You know, you almost had me going back there with the hickies."

"If only," he muttered so softly, I wasn't sure I'd heard correctly.

"Hm?"

His shoulders tensed, then he breathed a feeble laugh as he glanced back at me, "If only… I'd, er... remembered to bring some makeup! Ah well, maybe next time, huh? C'mon, let's go." His hand reached for mine.

I took it and suddenly my hand didn't feel so sad anymore as I let him lead me back out into the mall.

I couldn't sleep.

I rolled over onto my left side, pulling the sheets up to my chin and curling in on myself a bit. Then over to my right. A few seconds ticked by. Then I rested my back to the mattress and frowned up at my bedroom ceiling, at the long thin patch of frail moonlight slashing across it from between the curtains of my window. Sighing, I tossed over onto my side again and tried putting my head beneath the pillow this time, hoping the added darkness and some light hypoxia would do the trick to knock me out.

No such luck.

With another heavy sigh, I sat up, letting the pillow fall back down behind me. I brought a hand up towards one of my earplugs, stopping just short of reaching it as I frowned over at the wall I shared with my roommates. Then I tentatively pulled it out, already preemptively grimacing as the noises I might hear.

Instead my ears were greeted with a very different sound and from a different direction no less. Coming through my closed door from the living room was a faint, hollow murmur of voices. I squinted towards it, tipping my head to one side. Was that… the TV? Tugging the other earplug out, I set both down onto my nightstand as I listened for another minute, my fingers fiddling with my braid. Then folding my sheets away from me, I got out of bed, smoothed my nightgown and crept over to the door to open it.

Lea was sitting on his couch out here, the glow of the television screen the only thing illuminating him in the otherwise dark living room. Since him couch-surfing here was becoming a bit of a habit now, he'd started bringing an overnight bag with him for things like toiletries and the pyjamas he was currently wearing - a black tank top and PJ pants patterned with tiny fireballs sporting evil smiley faces. In fact I think it may have been the same design on the frisbees I'd seen back at his apartment. Some kind of brand logo, perhaps?

His elbows were braced up on the backrest behind him, temple propped against one fist as he watched the screen. He glanced over at me as I stepped out, quirking an eyebrow and lifting his head off his knuckles. "El?"

I gave my braid a tiny tug before dropping my hands and clasping them together, forcing them to be still as I gave him a small smile. "You're up late."

He grinned back. "Yeah. Never really could pass out to total silence," he nodded towards where his own earplugs laid discarded on the coffee table. Then he wrinkled his nose, shooting a sideways glance towards Rayne's and Riku's room. "But shit, you weren't kidding 'bout those two going at it like jackrabbits in there. Had to do something to tune 'em out, so turned on the ol' tube and guess what I found?"

I moved to stand beside him for a better view of the TV. The scene was currently zoomed in on a couple riding in the back row seat of a trolley. The girl was distracted, lost in whatever she was talking about while the guy was reaching his hand over to tuck her hair back, only to awkwardly snatch it away when she suddenly turned to look at him, completely oblivious to the gesture as she continued to enthusiastically ramble on. My smile grew as I took a seat next to Lea. "It's Before Dawn. Imagine that."

"I know. What timing, right?" he hummed a small laugh. We were both quiet for a few seconds, simply watching the movie. Then he nudged my knee with his, "And what brings ya out here in the middle of the night? Other than the pleasure of my charming company, of course."

That earned him a soft snort as I slouched more comfortably into the sofa and picked up one of the small throw pillows, hugging it in my arms. "Trouble sleeping."

"Oh?" he looked over at me, relaxing his hand along the top of the cushions behind my head. "Something on your mind?"

I gnawed on my bottom lip, not taking my eyes off the television even though I wasn't really paying attention to it anymore. "...it's just coming up so fast."

Brow furrowing, he squinted up at the ceiling in thought for a second. "You mean our visit to the parental units?"

My insides churned as I gave a small nod. "It's only a week away now. It doesn't feel like enough time. I don't know if I'll be able to go through with this… if we… if I will be prepared in time… if I'll be able to face them."

"Hey, don't worry 'bout it," he flashed a warm grin. "You and me? We got this. I like to think we've become quite the awesome dynamic duo. Gotten pretty good at this whole girlfriend-boyfriend thing. Got the entire mall buying into our story and if we can fool them, we can fool anyone."

"But it's not anyone," I muttered, squeezing the pillow more tightly to me. "It's Father. And Mother. And..." my face scrunched up, "...the Duke too? ...for some reason? Anyway, tricking Father for a grand total of five minutes was one thing, but now? Now it's my whole family. For a whole weekend. What if they find out?" Oh dear, I could already feel a panic attack coming on just thinking about it. I turned my head, frowning at him. "...what if I can't do this?"

The hand behind me lifted, hesitantly hovering and shifting about for a second before settling on a quick, reassuring pat to my head. "Just say the word and you can pull the plug on this whole op anytime ya want. Don't force yourself to do anything you don't wanna do. But just know you're a lot stronger than you think. And chances are? It won't be as bad as you fear." He poked himself in the side of the head, just above his left ear, "Our brains like to mess with us, tell us things will be a lot worse than they actually turn out to be. And 'sides, you won't be doing this alone. I'll be right there with you the whole weekend. Your sister too. We got your back. You got a support system. Consider us your safety net. We'll be there to pick up the slack and catch you if you fall."

I bowed my head, nose perched on top of the edge of the pillow now. "...thank you. That helps," I muffled into it, my tiny smile hidden. And I meant it. I could already feel some of my unease starting to slip away. Straightening back up and tossing my head back onto the couch, I inhaled deeply before loudly exhaling. "I should just stop thinking about it. Stressing out over it now does me no good. I need to be talking about something else."

"Something else, huh?" he mumbled, eyes returning to the movie as he scratched the tip of his nose. "...so I had a thought. Remember the other day when you said you'd be looking for a new place in a few months when lil Baby Hewley arrived?" His knee started jiggling up and down while out of the corner of my eye, I could see his fingers fidgeting with the seam of the backrest cushions. "Well, what if… and ya know, this would only be if you weren't able to find somewhere on your own and if, like… you had no place else to go and were up shit's creek and whatnot, but… what if you moved in with…" he glanced back my way, "...me?"

I blinked at him. "...you?"

His face brightened. "Yeah, whaddya think? We got plenty of space for ya! It'll be a total blast! And hey, we could even get ya a puppy."

Fighting a grin, I quirked an eyebrow. "A puppy? But what about Saïx?"

"Psh," he brushed off, one hand batting the air. "Saïx can fight me. You want a dog? You're getting a dog, end of story."

I snerked and looked down. Lips pursing to one side, I did a mental replay of what I could remember of when Lea had given me the grand tour of his apartment. "...am I forgetting a third bedroom you guys have?"

"Nah," he shook his head, "just the two. But you can have mine and I'll just… I dunno, sleep on the couch."

"You can't sleep on the couch in your own home," I scoffed.

"Sure I can! I'm actually growing quite accustomed to catching some Z's on 'em. These bad boys are surprisingly comfy," he pat the armrest next to him and beamed. "In fact, dunno if I can ever go back to a lame ol' bed again!"

Rolling my eyes, I said, "I meant because Saïx will see you. Won't he have questions about you sleeping on the sofa every night?"

"Oh. Right," he laughed, fingers ruffling his hair. "Well then I can just… sleep in the room with you. On the floor," he hastily amended. "Yeah, it'll be fun! Like a slumber party every night!"

One side of my lips twitched up as I toyed with the corner of the throw pillow I was still holding snug. "You're sweet, but… no, that'd just be crazy."

"...yeah. Crazy," he averted his gaze with a tiny chuckle. Then he frowned, plucking the short hairs at the nape of his neck. "...is it though? I mean, think about it. It'd be like the next stage of our dating evolution. That's what all couples do sooner or later, right? Move in together?"

"But the baby will be here in, what…" both my eyebrows rose as I stared off into space, "...four more months? Five? I figure we'll have probably staged a breakup by then."

"Breakup?!" he jerked forward in his seat, eyes widening slightly.

I knit my eyebrows together. "Well yeah. You… didn't think we were going to be fake dating forever, right?"

"Well, I…" he hunched forward, propping his elbows on his knees and folding his hands together beneath his nose as he narrowed his gaze on the floor. "...no, I guess not."

I tilted my head at him. Then opened my mouth. Then closed it. I focused on the TV instead. "...I figured… it'd be some time after we visited my parents. Depending on how it goes, of course. Once I was…" I shrugged, gripping the pillow more tightly, "...sure they weren't going to try to interfere with my life anymore. After that… maybe a few more weeks? A month, perhaps? Just so it wouldn't look too quick, too… suspicious or raise questions…"

Why was this so hard? Why did it make my heart squeeze, just a bit? Come on, it's not like it was a real breakup! Besides, this could maybe, possibly, eventually open up the door to actually start something more real with him in the future. If I ever got the guts up to even pursue something like that… whenever he started dating again… which would be when he no longer had to focus on his schoolwork… aka when he graduated...

...in two years…

Why did that suddenly seem like an eternity?

"...yeah," he sighed and slumped back again, his arm returning to its position behind me as he stretched them both out along the backrest once more, "that all makes sense, I guess." His lips were a flat line for a few seconds, but then he grinned over at me. "Tell ya one thing, though. Fake getting over you ain't gonna be easy. Might have to try and fake win you back."

"Oh no," I stifled a soft laugh into my fingers. "Hang on, let me guess… You. In a trenchcoat. Standing in the middle of the bustling food court. Boombox held high over your head and blasting out some old, cheesy love song. That about sum it up?"

He smirked, "Ah, fan of the classics like me, I see. Good guess, but I was actually thinking less John Cusack in Say Anything and more Heath Ledger in 10 Things I Hate About You. Me. With a mic hacked into the food court's overhead speakers. Singing and dancing around on table tops while mall security chases me all over the place."

This big dork really was a sap. That is, if his taste in movies had anything to say about it.

Shaking my head in amusement, I said, "Who's to say you'd even fake want me back? Maybe it's you who ends up fake dumping me."

He huffed out a derisive snort, "Not a chance. I'd never be dumb enough to let someone like you go." I looked away, grateful the light from the TV wasn't bright enough to reveal the gentle warmth spreading into my cheeks. Lea shrugged as he went on, "Now, dumb enough to do something stupid and royally fuck it up so you'd kick my ass to the curb however? Yeah, now that sounds like it'd be pretty on brand for me."

"No, I don't think so," I smiled, resting my chin atop the seam of the throw pillow. "...thanks, Lea. I feel a lot better now. You're a… a really good friend."

Lea was quick to return the smile, "It's what I'm here for!" His gaze went back to the screen and there was a brief pause where the only sound was the low drone from the movie. "So… was that your roundabout way of wishing me a good night?"

"Hmm..." A beat before I shook my head, "Not yet. I think I'd like to stay and watch for a little while longer, if that's alright."

"It's more than alright," the corners of his eyes crinkled as he settled into his seat more comfortably. "It's alright times two."

I'm not sure exactly when it was I nodded off. Last scene I clearly remembered was our leading couple sitting at a restaurant together, their hands miming phones to their ears as they made imaginary calls to one another, so it must have been not too long after that. Next thing I knew I was blinking blearily at the television as it showed the girl now sitting on a bed in a small apartment, serenading the guy with her guitar. They both looked maybe a few years older. Must have been one of the sequels to the first movie. I was less familiar with those. It seemed Lea had stumbled upon some sort of late night marathon.

As consciousness returned to me piece by tiny piece, it slowly came to my attention that there was something... off about the pillow my cheek was resting against. Like the fact that it was oddly firm. And warm. And…

...breathing?

Eyes fully snapping open now, they darted about to realize I'd fallen asleep on Lea. Against his chest, to be exact. Embarrassed and panicking maybe just a smidge, I immediately tried to straighten up and away from him, only to be held firmly in place by the arm - his arm - that was draped heavily around my shoulders. I furrowed my brow over at it. Wha-?

Then he made a noise and I tensed.

Took me several heart-pounding seconds to register that noise for what it was.

A snore.

Puffing out a hushed breath and forcing my muscles to relax, I tentatively, cautiously turned my head to try and look up at him. Didn't work, and it only took me another second to realize why. There was a weight pressing down on the top of my hair that I hadn't really noticed until just now.

He was using my head as a pillow.

Welp. This was quite the predicament I found myself in.

Oh gosh, I just hope we'd fallen asleep roughly around the same time and had just, I don't know... naturally gravitated toward one another in our slumber? If I'd been snuggling up to him like this while he was awake the whole time, I'd never live it down.

Next thing my brain decided to alert me to was the fact that I'd misplaced my throw pillow. I must have dropped it when I'd dozed off for I was pretty sure I could feel it on the floor brushing against my bare feet. But that wasn't the important part. No, the important part was what my hands had decided to do in the wake of its disappearance. Left hand? It was good. Just laying there in my lap, all well behaved and polite-like. The right one, however? Had found its way over to rest atop Lea's knee. The little trollop. Especially considering that one of his hands was currently covering it. Had it no decency? No shame?

I considered my situation for another minute. Then taking a deep breath, I decided to commence with the extraction. Should be easier now that I was fully awake and aware of my circumstances so I could approach it all with a cooler, more level head.

First I used my free hand to gently lift his arm from my shoulder and gingerly set it back down on the couch backrest. Another snore from him and I froze. After a few seconds where nothing else happened however and I was sure I hadn't disturbed him, I then proceeded to bring my hand back up, this time to delicately press my fingertips to his chin.

Careful now, careful… wouldn't want to wake him…

I slowly pushed his head off mine and kept going until it lolled back onto the cushions behind him instead. With nothing left weighing me down now, I crept up onto my feet and peeked back at him to make sure he still snoozed. I was rewarded with yet another soft snore. That was all the confirmation I needed. I turned to make a break for my room.

Victory! Success! Elsa, Queen of The Daring Escape and-

Ack!

...okay, so something had just happened. More precisely, two somethings, both occurring at the exact same time. The first? Was my arm being pulled taut and bouncing me back like a rubber band stretched too tight. I stumbled but caught myself, the carpet muffling any sound I might have made. The second? Now that was just a word. One single, solitary word:

"Stay."

That one word sent my heart catapulting up into my throat as I whipped around to discover Lea had pulled his head up and was now looking straight at me.

Fudge, fudge, fudge, fudge!

...but actually… wait… his eyelids were sagging heavily. Half closed and groggy. His expression slack. And now that I thought about, when he'd spoken, it had come out sounding a little… sluggish? One might even say… drowsy?

...was he still half asleep?

I haltingly raised a hand to wave in front of his face. No reaction. As my shallow breaths began to slow and my heart rate calmed, I next looked down at my other hand to see what the snag had been there. This was the one that had been on his knee with his hand on top of it. Was still on top of it and, in fact, had tightened his grip around my fingers. This was what had snared me and brought my getaway to a screeching halt.

Yeesh, what a clingy sleeper he must be.

I brought my gaze back up to his face. He was still giving me that droopy, zombie-eyed stare. I tucked in my lower lip, studying him for a moment. Then I took a tiny step closer and bent over him slightly. My free hand came up, reaching for him. I froze midway, fingers curling towards my palm, hesitating. But only for a heartbeat before I was pushing forward again.

"Shh… go back to sleep," I whispered, gently stroking his hair just above his ear.

His really, really soft, silky smooth hair.

Which I'd not been expecting. Not at all.

Crud, I shouldn't be blushing this much.

However, it seemed to have the desired effect. His eyelids drifted all the way closed now as his head sank back down into the couch cushion. His hold on my hand relaxed enough for me to slip it free. I straightened back up, rubbing my rescued hand with the other as I watched him sleep for a few more seconds, my head tipping to one side. Then I retrieved the throw pillow from the floor and put it back on the sofa next to him before picking up the comforter to drape over him. It was only now I realized that it was too small for him for if I brought it up to cover his shoulders, it left his feet exposed.

The friggin' behemoth. Why hadn't he said anything? I'd have to see about finding a bigger one for him tomorrow.

I briefly considered turning off the TV but decided against it on the off chance the sudden lack of noise would wake him. Turning, I tiptoed back towards my bedroom, stopping in the doorway for one last backwards glance at him. Still out like a light. A grin pulled at one side of my mouth as I murmured, "Sweet dreams, sleeping beauty."

The only answer I got was a snore.

Author's Note: Our awkward penguin did it! She intentionally "made a move" for the first time, I'm so proud T_T Looks like our fire boi tried to make a bit of a move himself under the clocktower staircase there… with far less successful results xD One step forward, two steps back, huh? *Siiiiigh* ah well, these two will get there eventually :P And this is yet another chapter I lament not writing anything from Lea's POV… so many scenes in my head going on for him off camera that will never see the light of day xD Fun fact: The ice cream this chapter, Three Wishes, is named after (you guessed it) Agrabah's keyblade and I imagine its description on the menu would look something like: "This blueberry flavored soft serve will have you wishing for more! Comes in a blue cone wrapped in a ring of matching blue cotton candy, with lamp-shaped sugar cubes and a sprinkling of extra sugar to top it all off."

Next chapter, with that "make a move" hurdle finally overcome, what's next in our couple's fake dating adventures? Looks like there's a certain dinner with a certain Moon Boy on the horizon, how will this lil "test run" go? Will it be a resounding success or could it spell utter defeat for our pair? Not to mention the weekend with the folks is fast approaching, will our couple be ready in time? And just how DOES Lea fit his behemoth self into those itty-bitty pirate ship train carts? Some things will forever remain a mystery, but for the rest, stay tuned!

Thanks for reading, I super duper appreciate it! And an extra BIG thank you to those of you who’ve liked, reblogged, and followed so far, seeing those lil notifications always brings the biggest, goofiest smile to my face!

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

[shadowthrone-ammanas]

If you wouldn't mind Prompt: Hat Kid WILL force Mu and Mafia Boss to get along for ONE PECKING DAY ON HER BIRTHDAY... even if the month doesn't technically exist on this planet. And she WILL resort to blackmail and bribery. And maybe forget everyone else she invited while she's threatening them.

Thank you for the request!

Birthday Party

“You’re here!” Hat Kid said as she hugged Mu mere seconds after she’d boarded the ship.

“Of course I’m here,” Mu said. “You honestly think I’d miss your birthday party?” She was far too excited for it to miss it. It had been so long since she’d attended a birthday party.

Hat Kid stepped back, smiling wide. “No, I’m just excited. Almost everyone’s here now.” She leaned in to speak quieter. “Even Snatcher came. He’s disguised as one of the Subconites as if that could fool me. … Okay, maybe it almost did but I hugged them all and I could feel that one of them wasn’t a plushie like the rest so it has to be him. I pretended not to notice so don’t let any of them know I know though because then he’ll probably leave.” She rocked back, resuming a normal speaking tone. “Only the Empress and Cooking Cat aren’t here.”

“Yeah uh, Cooking Cat told me to tell you that she’d going to be like an hour late because she’s got like an important thing to deal with. But did you seriously invite the Empress? Don’t you hate her?” Everything Mu knew about the Empress, Hat Kid had told her and all of that info had come with a large dose of complaining and obvious distain.

“Yep, but it’s my birthday so everyone’s invited to have a good time. But she’s been kind of afraid of me ever since that time in the elevator when I almost killed her so I’m not really surprised she didn’t come. So I can accept this. Once Cooking Cat gets here the party will be complete unless the Empress shows up late too, that’d be cool.”

Mu doubted that would happen. She’d heard the tale of the elevator incident and following court trail, there was no way the Empress would come after that. It was for the best though because according to Hat Kid, she was a gang leader, a powerful one too. Not the kind of person Mu wanted to be around.

But speaking of people, there were lots of them here, filling the central room. Along with tons of balloons in a rainbow of colours, some floating around the ceiling, others tied in bunches around the posts on the railings. There was also a table filled with food and drinks. A large multilayered cake decorated with bright pink frosting was the center piece. … Mu wanted some.

“When are you going to cut into the cake?” she asked, pointing to it.

“Uh… we can do that now, I guess. It’s apparently like a thing here, right? Blowing out the candles and making a wish? That’s what Grooves told me anyway, he made the cake by the way. I don’t think we do that were I’m from. I don’t really know though because no one every invited me to their birthday parties back home. But let’s go get some cake, I bet it’s good.” Hat Kid took Mu’s hand and brought her along as she skipped over to the table.

 -

Mu was on her second slice of cake when she remembered to take it slow. She had more food than she could ever possibly eat right there on the table free for her to take as much as she wanted and it wasn’t going to be taken away and she didn’t need to worry about starving in general because she lived with Cooking Cat now who fed her well. So she could take her time and enjoy the cake instead of stuffing her face with it until she felt sick.

So, taking a deep breath, she looked up at it to look around the room again. She’d chosen a spot on the upper walkway to eat, by the later so she could dangle her legs over the edge. She could see pretty much everyone else in the room from up here.

The Subconites were the most tightly knit group, staying all together in the corner opposite the food table. Supposedly one of them was Snatcher himself. Which one, Mu couldn’t even begin to guess, they all looked nearly identical and none of them seemed to act any different than the others. Maybe Hat Kid was mistaken? … Probably not, she claimed Snatcher was her BFF after all so she had to know him pretty well.

The bulk of the guests filling the room was a mix of owls, penguins and seals. They were all mingling and chatting. There were some mountain people too. DJ Grooves stood out amongst them because of his weird shoes and large hair. He was hanging with the Conductor which was a surprising because weren’t they supposed to be enemies? Though Hat Kid claimed they were in love despite everything Mu had heard that contradicted that. But she did know them better than Mu did so maybe she was right. The ship captain was sitting by the table, the half that had the drinks, looking like he wished those drinks were alcoholic. Maybe miserable was just how his face looked though.

But also sitting at the table, unnoticed before due to Mu’s focus on the food on the other side of the table, were four Mafia goons – one of them was the green goggled one who was actually almost kind, letting Mu get away on multiple occasions, even giving her food a few times when no one else was around, therefore making him the closest thing to a good guy in the entire Mafia – and… the Mafia Boss. He even had his body back due to Snatcher shenanigans with the dumb Death Wish contracts – threat of death or no, Mu would’ve refused to participate in those if she’d known the Mafia Boss was too because it was almost like working with him, too late now though. Considering Hat Kid had invited the Empress, this wasn’t surprising. But that didn’t mean Mu was going to tolerate it; the Mafia was her sworn enemy.

She finished the last bite of her cake before putting the plate and fork down for now. She then hopped down, landing next to an owl and seal chatting. Ignoring their surprise at her sudden drop in, she started for the Mafia. What she’d say or do when she reached them, she didn’t know nor did she really care. What mattered was that she made her displeasure known and hopefully they would leave.

She wasn’t being sneaky so it was no surprise when the Mafia Boss’ eyes locked onto her as she stepped up to the table. “You,” he said with as much hate in his voice as Mu felt for him.

“Yeah, me,” she replied. “You’re lucky there are children at this party otherwise I’d be stuffing you back into a jar where you belong.” Honestly the fact that Snatcher had undone that was so unfair.

He growled as he stood up to loom over her. As if that were frightening, especially when there was a still a table between them. “You’re the one who’s lucky here girl. I’d have your head if there weren’t so many witnesses around.”

“Uh… Mafia think that this is probably not good place to fight,” the green goggled Mafia goon cut in. “Is hat child’s birthday…”

“Shut up,” Mu and the Mafia said in near unison, resulting in an angry snarl from both of them. Before either of them could say anything else though…

“Howdy,” Hat Kid stepped in wearing a smile. “I knew you guys would see each other eventually and would try to start a fight. I’m here to tell you that you’re not allowed to because this my birthday party and everyone is going to have a good time, that means you guys need to get along and be nice to each other.”

“Hell no,” Mu said. Hat Kid could do whatever the peck she wanted to but Mu wasn’t going to sit here and ‘get along’ or ‘be nice’ to the Mafia Boss of all people. “He’s a piece of shit, you know that.”

“She stuffed me in a jar,” the Mafia Boss shouted over her.

Not to be outdone, Mu raised her voice too. “He’s a murderer! He’s responsible for the deaths of everyone on the island and he tried to kill you!”

“You tried to kill her too! And your responsible for the deaths of like half the planet’s population!”

“That’s because I was killing you fuckers! And it was pecking undone so it doesn’t pecking count! And how dare you pecking compare me to you! You pecking…”

“Stop!” Hat Kid shouted, somehow making her voice louder than either of theirs, as she jumped up on the table to stand directly between them. “No more fighting. If you guys say even one more mean thing to each other or about each other I’m kicking you out of the party and never allowing you back on my ship.”

“You wouldn’t do that to me,” Mu said, glaring up at her. “I’m your friend.” Or at least Mu thought they were friends. Maybe they actually weren’t, not if Hat Kid wanted to consider the Mafia Boss a friend too.

“I wouldn’t banish you from the ship forever but I will kick you off for the rest of today and I won’t let you take home any cake or balloons. It’s my birthday so I want people to be nice and get along. I’ve never had a birthday party before please don’t ruin it by being mean and starting fights. You guys can go back to being enemies tomorrow but for just today could you please at least tolerate each other.” She’d started angry but by the end she looked at them both with puppy dog eyes that glistened with unshed tears.

It might’ve been a fake look to make Mu, and by the look on his face the Mafia Boss too, feel guilty. She might just be trying to manipulate them with tears and a sob story about never having had a birthday party before this one. … If so, it was working. That look made Mu feel bad. But… how could she possibly tolerate the Mafia Boss?

Silence hung heavy in the room. Everyone was watching now, with all the yelling that had happened of course they were. It was awkward and a bit embarrassing and yet no one did anything. Everyone was waiting for either Mu or the Mafia Boss to back down or resume the fight and get kicked out.

Mu wasn’t going to back down, she was going to wait to see what the Mafia Boss did. If he resumed being hostile, he’d be at fault and would get kicked out. There was no way he wouldn’t, right? He didn’t care about upsetting Hat Kid or being permanently banned from her ship. He’d for sure…

He sat back down. “Fine,” he said. “I shall try to get along with her if she tries to do the same in return.” He gave her a pointed look, putting the entire room’s attention on her as well. He was such a bastard. He exactly what she’d wanted him to do. Instead he wanted her to be the bad guy and get kicked out. Well she wasn’t playing that game.

“Fine,” she said, crossing her arms and lifting her chin. “I’ll be nice too.”

“Yay!” Hat Kid said, seemingly genuinely happy. “Thank you!”

Trying to ignore the eyes still on her, Mu turned and went back to the cake. She’d get another piece and then go back to people watching. Or maybe she’d go hang out with the Subconites and try to figure out which one was Snatcher in disguise. Or maybe she’d hang out with some of the seals, they were awfully cute and friendly. No matter what though, if she wanted to resume having a good time here, she was going to avoid the drink side of the table or anywhere else the Mafia ended up going. She was going to try to go back to having a good time though partly out of pure spite.

For this event.

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ upd8 2020-01-17

Alright, morningblogging yesterday’s 2020-01-17 upd8 to Homestuck^2 let’s go!  Spoiler-free again.  I kinda don’t want even the next chapter names image-spoiled above the cut anymore so I’m going to have to figure out WHAT to put above the cut in these liveblog posts for visual reinforcement... a unique silly icon?  Going back once I’m done with the upd8 and posting something non-spoilery but weird-looking out of context?

Eh, can’t be assed.  Just know that after this I’m going to pony up for the Patreon commentary and skim it for anything plot-useful to y’all (in a separate post).  Let’s get started.

Okay, what’s next:  Any bonuses?  Oh, none!  Phew.  Unless those are coming faster too and just staggered differently, which would mean I gotta overcome my irrational pre-Homestuck-reading anxiety even MORE often.  :T

No Homestuck you don’t GET to ask how my-- ah, right.  :P

(FYI, HS^2 has been good to my emotions so far, quite a balm for the epilogues, so once I START reading I’m usually fine; but after being hurt so badly how could I possibly convince my lizard brain to trust it until it’s right in front of me?  Seriously, just hearing that the upd8 has landed messes me up a bit until I come fix it by reading w/ y’all here.)

Okay, so whose feelings?  As much as I’ve been waiting for Jade, I hope this isn’t about Jade.

> ==>

Ah fuck, we’re finally with the Pursuit Crew.  Bracing myself.  That means we get to see probably sleeping Jade ( :C ), full-swing DaveKat (approving nod), the first canon onscreen look at masculine-mode Roxy (<3), a probably pretty pissed off Kanaya (possibly either the feelings target, the one Saying How Are Your Feelings, or both), and uh... did they drag Callie along?  Or leave her back there with her meta freakout?  Probably left her back there, but... hm.

Let me turn up the brightness on this screen to sear these next pages into my retinas.  (Also, it feels odd to still be using a four-person “==>” for these, although if Jade is still asleep the numbers might fit on both ends... :c )

> ==>

I don’t think Dad is in the spacefaring business, so this is probably one of Jake’s shittier spaceship designs.

> ==>

...well that’s a touch disturbing.  Is that a Jade-occupied bed or are those just pillows?

Oh what the fresh fanfic’y heck is this command.

> i enter.

Okay that’s great.  I got a kick out of that.

JADE [in calliope red]: the prince’s power grows.

--but that’s not.  That explains the narrative command text, it’s alt!callie talking through a still conked-out Jade.  Please let her wake up between speak-throughs, please tell me you’ve learned that trick??  I already know you’re gonna pull an “oh she was asleep pretty much all of those THREE YEARS OF TRAVEL” thing on me and that’s hard fucking enough to deal with.

KARKAT: JESUS CHRIST!

He’s actually using the full curse correctly, huh?

...These commands.  Guess part of the puzzle is how much alt!Callie is being typically morbid and how much she might actually be wising up enough to get a kick out of this.

> the knight of blood falls.

DAVE: dude can you chill for like even a single fucking second DAVE: also are you ok

Has CallieJade chilled for even a single second this entire trip??  Is he asking just if Karkat’s okay or Jade too???

--yeah I’m overblowing things out of nervousness.  Just wait and see a bit, boots.

Alt!Callie has at least learned to be more of a smartass:

> karkat is characteristically appreciative of the alarm call.

Shirt trade Karkat, nice.  And uh, Jade’s dress sure is a... dress.  Hm.

(Did alt!Callie alchemize adjustments to did she just luck out to have a red-symbol’d Bec belt and accent leggings?  I’d prefer the former, because as much as it would be acceptable within Homestuck proper, using the transition between the epilogues and this new-author’d work to just HAPPEN to give her a fitting outfit without an excuse via providence is kind of lazy.)

KARKAT: OH, PARDON THE FUCK OUT OF ME FOR OVERREACTING A LITTLE WHEN MY GOOD FRIEND "POSSESSED JADE" BUSTS INTO MY RESPITEBLOCK AT 5 AM! KARKAT: NEXT TIME I’LL JUST PULL THE COVERS BACK AND LET HER CLIMB IN! JADE: i am uninterested in that scenario. KARKAT: GREAT! POSSESSED JADE ISN’T EVEN HORNY! HOW FUCKED UP IS THAT?

...please let that mean he’s not used to her being possessed all the time and she wakes up sometimes.  PLEASE.

DAVE: but im pretty sure i locked that door JADE: i unlocked it with my mind. DAVE: fuck KARKAT: FANTASTIC. JADE: the prince’s powers are growing, but so are mine.

Dave, I’m pretty sure regular-ass no-Green-Sun Space powers can flip a few lock tumblers too.  (--though, I guess from context this was a Jakeship technolock.  Confirmation on the ship’s bad taste in design.  --I think I’m foggily remembering it said in the Epilogues that they took one of Jake’s ships just like Dirk did, too... man, being depressed so much by the Epilogues sure took a lot out of my ability to recall them decently.)

KARKAT: LIKE YOU DON’T FLOAT AROUND LIKE A CREEPY PIECE OF SHIT ALL DAY AS IT IS?

God DAMN IT she’s been asleep and possessed the whole fucking time.

> sleep is abandoned, coffee sought.

More obligatory DaveKat being cute, somehow only emphasized by the embarrassing glowing-with-power observer who doesn’t really get any of it.

Ah, here we go:

> the rogue is also awake.

Oh huh.  Cool!

Hero outfit, understated...  her his choice of heart-shades color-coded to stand out from Dave more to avoid further mistaken identity cases.  Works well!  (Holy shit I only JUST remembered at the end to go back and correctly gender Roxy as him, that was close. I blame the epilogues for a lack of visual reinforcement; I shouldn’t have as much trouble soon enough.  Seriously, I don’t remember ANYTHING without visual reinforcement, I think that’s why I remember so much of Homestuck proper so clearly.)

KARKAT: OH SHIT, THERE SHE IS! I DIDN’T EVEN HEAR HER FOLLOW US! ROXY: sometimes a girls just got to get her drift on i guess ROXY: it be like that

ilu roxy.

I missed Roxy so much, you guys.  I need more of him remarking on all this crazy shit if I’m gonna stay sane though all this.  (And I need more of him and AWAKE JADE kicking ass independently or together if I’m going to continue to believe there’s justice in the world.)

> ==>

We rarely saw Rose drinking anything but the rare coffee in canon, but I think Kanaya would have gotten her plenty into tea, yes.  Or at the very least, wanting the aesthetic of drinking tea with Kanaya would have gotten Rose into tea even if it never crossed Kanaya’s mind to try the stuff.

ROXY: well i mean who knows what she drinks now ROXY: dirk probs tossed the coffee machine out the space window right away ROXY: dude doesnt "believe" in "substances" > the prince is contemplated for a moment in silence.

FUCK, Dirk can see the narrative all the way out here???  No wonder alt!Callie’s forced to have possession turned on 24/7.  That’s fucking disappointing.  How the hell are we going to get any proper Jade time with THAT hanging over our heads?  She’d only be able to do anything when Dirk’s knocked out, and maybe not even THEN!

I was virtually promised more of actual non-asleep Jade getting shit done in HS^2.  Now there’s an even longer wait on it than I expected.  This sucks.

(EDIT: BOY did I misread that link line. Thinking “is contemplated” meant is sitting contemplating, when it meant "is being contemplated by everyone here". That was dumb of me.)

*clicks that next link*

Oh my goodness, Roxy joined the Bird Hair Crew.  It makes him look like a fucking asshole but I kind of love it.

KARKAT: IS THERE MILK?

I can’t believe Karkat is okay with drinking milk.  --yes, culturally Trolls are more comfortable with animal excretions than we are, but you would’ve thought years of railing against Equius would have purged any tolerance the idea of milk from his psyche.

I guess Dave introduced him to cereal, and it was all over from there.

DAVE: this is more like a castle DAVE: a castle of idk DAVE: twenty something ennui

Sounds like a relatable mood.  Especially considering Dirk probably decided to conquer reality out of almost nothing but twenty-something ennui.

Alright.  You aren’t going to turn Kanaya into an alcoholic or anything on us are you?

> the knight of time seeks a sylph...

--this is the shittiest shipboard starship aesthetic.

> ...and finds her, momentarily.

WOW that looks fucking depressed.  :(

> ==>

...okay you know what?  Never mind.  That outfit has wrapped straight back around into Trying Too Hard and is now hilarious.

DAVE: you ever feel like our whole lives are eventually gonna end up like this DAVE: just blasting through space on a sweeps long journey to ""somewhere"" chasing after or running from some vague enemy thats sometimes a god modded pet dog and sometimes your dad DAVE: without the faintest fucking idea of whats going to happen when we get there DAVE: thats a little specific but you know what i mean

Why do you think the epilogues upset us so much?  We thought we’d won free of that bullshit.

> ==>

Oh jesus christ that’s the most depressingly sad I’ve ever seen Kanaya drawn.  :C

--Karkat got you to watch Serendipity?  That’s amazing, Dave.

KANAYA: You Arent Reminding Me Of Her As I Rarely Think Of Anything Else KANAYA: I Close My Eyes And I See Her KANAYA: I Keep Them Open And I See Her

Fuck.

Y’know how little showing these two in love and actually HAPPY together we’ve seen in this entire comic and its subworks?  Despite them having spent at least a few happy years together we only saw in tiny screenclips?  And how Candy alluded super hard that they most likely couldn’t get that in this real timeline where shit’s going down?

Seriously, FUCK.  You could at least pretend to give us some hope, here.

Oh no, don’t ask for the nursery story, Dave.  Unless it turns out to be a funny one or a Rose twist on an old story or something.  Which it probably is, I should stop worrying.

> ==>

KANAYA: Oh Its A Wriggler Story About A Young Prince And The Beloved Flower He Loved And Lost DAVE: flower DAVE: like a plant KANAYA: Its A Fairytale Dave DAVE: right KANAYA: A Singular Wild Rose He Failed To Cherish When He Had Her KANAYA: And His Journey Of Discovering What She Meant To Him All Along KANAYA: Culminating In A New Quest To Find Her And Win Her Back

Dirk you PIECE OF SHIT did you rewrite the narrative of the fucking STORIES SHE TOLD CHILDREN?!??  Does the fact that alt!Callie is only in the present mean he can rewrite ANY past event we didn’t literally SEE???  FUCK you.  Seriously fuck all of this.

Please tell me she was kidding just then, or realizes there’s fucking something wrong with what she’s saying and getting angry or.

(EDIT: shoutyourporpoise replied: "Hey, idk If you picked up on this, but the 'nursery story' Rose told to the wigglers is just The Little Prince, which is maybe a BIT early for them to read, but I don't think that's a case of Dirk changing the narrative; its just Rose being Too Adult as usual." Oh, damn, I didn't even CATCH that it was that story. That makes all of this a lot more forgivable, even if pretty unforgivably leaning into the fiction that Dirk used to brainwash and kidnap her. Maybe that's exactly why it worked -- fiction, a story so blazed into the public consciousness? Hm. Thanks, shoutyourporpoise.)

KANAYA: But In A Way I Feel As If It Is the Greater Universe Trying To Tell Me Something

Mother fuck I’m even going to have to see our protagonists warped by Dirk when they’re ostensibly FULLY SHIELDED aren’t I.  There’s only so much of that I would be able to take, you know.

KANAYA: It May Simply Stem From My Longing To See Her Again And How Much Is Indicative Of Something More Sinister KANAYA: She Is A Goddess Of Light And The Only Of Her Kind We Know Is Alive After All KANAYA: Maybe Shes Wrested Dominion Of The Entire Concept In All Its Appearances Within This Frame Of Reference

Hm.  Well, it being a product of Rose’s ascension instead of Dirk’s is possibly a more charitable take, with Ultimate Rose projecting the delusion enforced on her backward, visible to past Rose’s Sight when she isn’t paying attention and thus paving the way for Dirk to paradoxically exploit that “ideal” as something Lighty and Important and “Perfect”.  I still don’t fucking like it though.

> ==>

DAVE: sorry i know you say you got your badass monster powers but kanaya you look tired as hell DAVE: not that im tryna psyche you or whatever but youre waxing poetic in the dark which i guess is maybe on brand but still

Yyyep.

DAVE: unless terezi is lurking in the vents somewhere and now that i bring that up its actually not out of the question so im kind of gonna be thinking about that one for a while

Pffff.

DAVE: youre the only person i know whos still basically the same as when i met you

--Which is kind of going to have to change, right?  She’s got some other cosmic purpose ready to change her a little more than she changed pre-human-troll-meetup, you’d think.

> ==>

Cute as hell.

> ==>

KANAYA: How Are Your Feelings

There’s the title drop.  I’d think Dave’s doing pretty well, considering?  Still fucked over by Dirk betraying and tricking Rose away who he’s been close with all his life, but.

> ==>

DAVE: except sometimes your best friend disappears and your other best friend goes into a ghost coma and your third best friend fucks off to space with your dad DAVE: the dude youve spent the last 7 years convincing yourself isnt an egomaniacal anime villain DAVE: and who isnt actually lying in wait to completely decimate your life and your emotions and shit

Ah... yeah.  A little worse than my casual list, huh?  Forgot that Jade vanishing into a possession-coma for THREE FUCKING YEARS is going to be hard on people inside the comic too, fuck.

DAVE: maybe it was naive to think that a bunch of twenty something trauma victims could run a society

I was honestly surprised they TRIED to run society at all.  Jasp even just highlighted a big reason why not in the bonuses.

DAVE: cool how earth c existed for centuries then we show up and manage to ruin society in seven fucking years

:(

Well, the trolls got THEIR lesson on why they didn’t deserve to rule over their new universe like gods; I guess some of y’all needed that lesson too?

DAVE: every serious conversation i have inevitably falls apart into riffing on a casual acquaintances ass

True.

Dammit, Dave didn’t feel like he could just be Some Guy even on Earth C.  :(

> ==>

...don’t think I’ve forgotten that nursery story, though.  I don’t want to think that it was something that ACTUALLY past happened, especially not without manipulation.  Like maybe past Rose was foreseeing the false purpose that Dirk wrote for her or the like, a cooperative misunderstanding between the two instead of Dirk or Rose literally reaching back in time.

> meanwhile...

KARKAT: WAIT, WHY THE FUCK AM I EVEN ASKING? HE’S OBVIOUSLY NOT FINE. KARKAT: ARE ANY OF US? ARE YOU? ROXY: not rly KARKAT: EXACTLY.

:(

--Oh right.  I remember that Callie and Roxy were going reasonably steady in Meat even though it was only alluded to, she didn’t freak out and stay awol or what have you.  That’s good to remember.  But it means Roxy deliberately left her behind to go on this dangerous quest, for years.  :C

KARKAT: KANAYA BARELY EVEN TALKS, CALLIOPE WON’T LEAVE THEIR CABIN, JADE JUST FLOATS AROUND LIKE A CREEPY BALLOON THAT’S MOSTLY MADE OF HAIR.

Oh, SHIT.  I should have read one line further.  They DID bring her.  Alt!Callie being here too must really FUCK with her.  ...maybe she can actually learn to accept that alternate way her life might’ve played out, though?

KARKAT: THE REALLY FUCKED UP THING IS I MIGHT BE THE MOST OKAY OUT OF ALL OF US, WHICH IS HOW YOU KNOW SHIT HAS REALLY GONE GLOBES UP.

Quite true.

ROXY: ur kinda an intense dude anybody ever tell u that KARKAT: NO.

Pff.

> ==>

KARKAT: AGAINST PRETTY MUCH ALL ODDS, AND DESPITE ME NOT DESERVING ANY OF IT, I ENDED UP GETTING PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING I WANTED. KARKAT: OVER AND OVER AGAIN. KARKAT: SOMETIMES IT ALMOST FEELS LIKE WHATEVER SLATHERING MONSTROSITY OF A COSMIC HELLBEAST THAT PUT ALL THIS SHIT INTO MOTION...ACTUALLY LIKES ME?

Well, if you want to blame Lord English for instance... we never saw Caliborn and Karkat interact much, but the parallels between the two were drawn so severely that Caliborn was basically the idealized, multiverse-threatening Ultimate Kismesis that he’d always dreamed of.  And operated against him without him even ever quite realizing it.

If a level of “respect” went from Caliborn to Karkat, too, from his Lord-Englishy vision nigh-omnipresent, then this outcome isn’t very surprising at all.

> ==>

(I don’t quite feel I get why Roxy shifted to this exasperated-Dave expression, but I get logically that he’d been waiting for Karkat to make a breakfast choice... Homestuck proper rarely pulled a “last line said corresponds to next-panel’s expression” without either leaving the conversation blank or having the NEXT lines of the conversation reinforce it, to prevent this inelegant misunderstanding.  Andrew was really damned talented in getting his point across visually, in that regard.  Just like, that careful visual intent delivery.)

Alright, I guess that’s it for this short upd8!  Meeting the pursuit crew was both more and less difficult than I expected.  Hopefully I get desensitized a bit as the characters continue to feel semi-almost-sorta-fine.

I have NO idea how this group is gonna work as a proper crew when we get to whatever weird other-players’ session this shit is going down in, though.

[crewhonk]

Of The Line (4 2/2)

WARNINGS: This is very dark. Warnings for blood, gore, horror, bugs, dark!Bucky, fears of isolation, fears of loss, fears of loneliness, ANGST!

Chapter Summary: In which Giovanna, Steve and YN take the brunt of Wandas rage and power

Words: 2.5K (short, I’m sorry omg)

A series collaboration with @nomadsgrogers where she writes for Giovanna as the reader! We’re just projecting onto our writing, its FINE

Series Summary: Steve watches YN Banner grow up before his eyes– from a shy, dorky sixteen-year-old to a fierce, brilliant woman who never fails to keep him on his toes. He knows that she’s untouchable, but that doesn’t stop him from being completely wrapped around her finger for the rest of his long life.

Series Warnings: Mutual Pining, age gap, gun use, these two are idiots– seriously they’re so dumb, slow burn

Pairings: eventual Steve Rogers X Banner!Reader, eventual Buky Barnes X OC!Stark

AN: PLEASE, PLEASE COMMENT AND LIKE AND REBLOG OUR WORK! We’re getting a little discouraged due to the recent lack of notes on this series!

Till The End Masterlist / Of The Line Masterlist

_______________________

“Thor,” Steve couldn’t hide the anger from his voice— nor did he care to. “Status.” His eyes landed on Giovanna and YN who had since landed and were staring, open-mouthed up at the gaping hole in the ceiling by which Ultron and Tony had left. Natasha was somewhere— he heard her grunts and cries of men, Clint was also nearby, judging by the number of uncollected arrows in his area. 

“The girl tried to warp my mind,” Thor growled irritably, a crash sounded somewhere in the distance. “But fortunately, I am mighty. Take special care, I doubt a human could keep her at bay.”

YN and Giovanna’s laughs could be heard from all around the ship— they had always loved Thor’s dramatics— his Shakespearean way of living and breathing and shitting. It settled Steve knowing that they were okay. His relief was short-lived, however, when an impact like a train sent Steve flying ten feet and into a railing, knocking the breath out of his lungs. The last thing he saw before his vision went blurry was a flash of silver hair and a cock-sure smirk. 

_________________________

It was a flash of red and light, and Steve was back in the 1940s. Familiar garb on men's shoulders and pretty dresses on wide hips. Curls loosened with spins and messy with sweat. The heady scent of cigarettes pungent in the air, making Steve’s lungs ache on the right side of painful. There were banners dropping confetti— ‘Victory!’ They read, but for some odd reason, Steve didn’t feel that victorious. There was a horrible copper tinge to the air, a man laughing on the floor with a wine stain that looked too much like a bullet hole, a woman screaming as a man flipped her over his head— a sound that sent a chill down his spine. 

Steve stumbled through the crowd, the flashes of camera bulbs and red lipstick leaving him disoriented among the crowded room. ‘Too much red,’ Steve thought, 'I’m gonna drown’.

A grip, too tight on his shoulder with nails too sharp startled him out of his seemingly drunken haze. He spun around too quickly, trying his best to focus his dizziness so he could see who was smiling at him. 

It was Peggy— or it was supposed to be. Her smile was too tight, too turned up at the corners. There was no glint in her eye, no shine that made Steve’s heart race. There was an obnoxious flower in her curls and the ruffling of her dress was tasteless and tacky— nothing his Peggy would have worn. 

“Are you ready for our dance?” Her accent was similar, but the tone of it rather robotic and Steve wanted nothing but to run in the opposite direction of this stranger. “The war is over, Steve.” She pulled him to her— another action Peggy would have never done. Steve made to pull away but her grip was too strong. 

“We can go home.” There was a sudden flash of a tentacle and a skull at her words and he wrenched himself away from her, spinning back to find a very empty ballroom. There was a moment of silence before a slow, sad piano melody began to play. Steve looked for the source, but all the instruments were gone. 

Then, he saw her, sitting in a soft golden dress that seemed to blur under the lights. He walked to her, placed his hand lightly on her shoulder and sucked in a pained breath when YN look at him. Her eyes were dark, black mascara smeared around her eyes which lacked the magical green that entranced him whenever he got two feet close to her. There were tear tracks leading to the corners of her lips, light pink lipstick smudged messily. He didn’t need to ask to know that he was the reason her heart was broken. 

“Why’d you do it?” YN’s voice was weak and hollow. “Why would you leave me?”

“I didn’t— I could never leave you, YN.” He tried, but she just let out a single, heartbroken cry. 

“You said you would be back in a minute— or, maybe dad did— but all the same. When they tried to bring you back you weren’t there. You left— you always do.” Steve could feel her very soul shatter as she spoke and he wanted nothing more than to fall to his knees and beg for her forgiveness. For what, he didn’t know, but he would beg until the very end of time. 

“Please, YN, baby. You have to forgive me.” He wanted to cry but instead of releasing itself, the lump in his throat only expanded, threatening to tear his throat in two. 

“I couldn’t,” She whispered, and it was then that he noticed the silver glint on her ring finger. “I never could. That’s why I moved on. I don’t need you anymore, Steve. I’ll never need you again."

__________

“Hey, maybe we will actually make it in time to get Chick-Fil-A.” Giovanna cheered as she watched the last of the robots fly into the air— presumably to go and defend their leader who was surely taking one hell of a beating from Tony. Go, dad. 

“Oh, come on!” YN groaned and threw the empty clip from her gun to the floor, reloading it and placing it in her spot on her waist. Betty never failed YN. “You know I just watched that cow documentary— plant-based diet for me from now on.” She swore, making a cross over her heart with her finger. Giovanna rolled her eyes. 

“Yeah, but that’s cows! We all know chickens are the devil’s spawn.”

“Yeah, maybe but even demons have feelings.”

“Are you sure?”

“We feel things, don’t we?” YN turned, launching herself over the railing and landing on the balls of her feet on the floor below, heading towards the door. There was a blast of heat before a metal clunk that signified that Giovanna had followed her down. 

“I mean, sometimes but—“ Giovanna’s sentence was cut off by a crashing sound, and YN whipped around in time to see her best friend fall to the ground, a misty red gleaming in the usual dark brown of her iris. 

“Gio, No!” YN cried out before she too fell to her knees in a hazy fog. 

___________________

Giovanna woke to the rising gold sun drifting through her small apartment. It was humble— from humble beginnings come humble endings, she remembered someone say. YN, maybe— or Bruce. The apartment was nothing more than a single room. There was a mattress on the floor and pushed into a corner— thick blankets making it a soft nest for two people. The kitchen was small and messy and everything that made Giovanna content— satisfied— just out of reach of happy. 

The shower in the even smaller bathroom stopped, and the door opened with a blow of steam, revealing a beautiful, daunting man. He was the definition of dark beauty— YN would have described him as ‘Beauty and the Beast Beautiful’, long, deep scars marring his body and skin torn over his left shoulder, hanging from it a shining metal arm. Giovanna never tinkered with it— never felt the need to. No need to be smart when you could simply be domestic. 

“Want to go to the market, today? I’m down to my last few plums,” His voice was deep and husky and sent a jolt to her stomach— just barely swollen. She stood from her place in the bed, walking barefoot over to the man and wrapping her arms around his neck, placing kisses over his glistening chest and feeling his happy hum on her lips. 

“Let me get dressed, and we’ll go.” She whispered, walking back to her closet. One shelf, hangers long forgotten, plain clothing crumpled on the floor. She heaved the closet open, and let out a long, drawn-out blood-curdling scream. 

Three bodies piled out, one each more decayed than the last.

 First, and most rotted was her father, dark veins trailing from the Arc Reactor on his chest, moving up his neck and over his face, twisting it into something ugly and horrible and turning his bright eyes black. Giovanna squinted, crying out when a sickly green spider crawled out from the place his ear used to be. 

Natasha had fallen on top of him, a deep slash of a knife which had been cut right through her spine. There was a shining liquid seeping from it that smelled similar to lake water and soaking her hair. Her skin looked pale and blue and waterlogged, eyes white and rolled into the back of her skull. 

YN had rolled out after them— she had been the freshest. A copper scent filling the room and making Giovanna’s stomach heave. There was a knife slash across her face, marring her smile. Her blood, now green in decay, soaked her clothes, limbs twisted at horrendous angles. 

Giovanna whipped around, stumbling, hoping to find the man who was standing still in the kitchen. 

“Bucky— we need to call or help, I can’t—“ Giovanna sobbed, clutching at his shoulders and spinning him to face her. There was a glint in the light and a sharp pain in her lower stomach. In shock, she looked down, hands clutching at the deep wound in her tummy. She became weak suddenly, hands falling away from the gash-- falling open with a babies cry and sludge of dead grasshoppers and beetles falling to the floor. 

“Buck— what?” She looked up at the man she had found and saved and let him make her something so far from what she used to be. The gleaming knife in his hand was soaked with fresh blood— her blood— their Childs blood. 

“Cute— how you thought you could save me.”

___________________ 

When YN woke up, there was a single person in the cold room with her. YN was chained to the cold floor, the ice seeming to seep into her bones. She pulled at the chains, but they too were frozen to the floor. 

“Stuck, Little Bird?” The woman’s voice was unfamiliar, and YN squinted to see who it was. She could only see shapes— a nose similar to her own, hair the same texture. 

“Mama?” She asked weakly. The cold was beginning to make her drowsy and she fought the drooping of her lids. She needed warmth— something slow and gradual to stop the hypothermia but also not send her body into shock. There was a family waiting for her.

“Family? Oh, sweet bird. You have no family left, didn’t you know? Everyone followed my lead, eventually. I was the right one— leaving you alone in the jungle on your monster of a fathers doorstep.” The woman voice was colder than the metal sticking to YN’s skin. 

“No, you’re wrong. I have Dad and Uncle Tony and—“ YN’s voice faded as if all the hope and joy in her body was being sucked out with each passing breath. “— and Gio, and Steve, and Nat.” Her voice cut itself off— too weak to continue. 

“Oh, haven’t you heard, sweet thing?” The woman leaned in closer— no features arose, but something akin to eyes pierced YN’s soul deep down. “Your dad left you. He’s missing. Has been for a while now. Some people say he finally did the world a good deed and managed to killed himself, others day he was abducted by aliens, but all the same.”

YN felt her eyes well up with tears. Surely, she would have felt it— a loss that great. This couldn’t be real. 

“The Starks and Natalia? Well, that one was easy. It was only a matter of time before they realized how utterly average you were. How much of a freak you were. An abomination amongst men, YN. Even science turned its nose up at you. The girls -- Giovanna and Natasha-- are best friends with themselves and themselves alone— God, that had started long before they left you, though. Talked about you behind your back and everything. What a show that was when they got going.”

YN let out a choked sob which echoed around the room, the echo itself growing louder and louder until the woman shifted back and continued to speak. 

“Steve wouldn’t leave me. He’s, he—“ YN cried. She could feel her body slowing, could feel her skin and the metal becoming one. 

“He loves you?” The woman laughed shrilly, clapping her hands in joy at their revelation. “Always the stupid one, huh? Foolish, naive girl— he jumped ship the moment he knew he could go back to that woman— the one in his compass? Margaret!” The woman snapped her fingers. “Peggy, I believe was the name she went by. They have a family now, a white picket fence and a dog and a newborn on the way. And you know what they all have in common?” The woman sneered and leaned in close to YN’s face. YN, in all her strength, looked up to face the woman she thought to be her mother— find out who she was. How much she looked like her. 

Instead, with a great cry of the most pungent pain, YN came face to face with herself. 

“They are all better off without you, YN. All happier. All living better lives because they left. I mean, look at me— I’m the best version of you there is.” The woman— YN’s mother, or YN herself, or whoever she was, stood from her chair and turned, opening the door to reveal a barren wasteland of snow and ice. YN would surely die here. 

“Oh,” The woman said, mocking pity in her voice. “You won’t die. You can’t. Instead, you’ll rot here, alone for the rest of time. Nobody will hear you, and even if they did, who would want to save a poor, unfortunate soul like yours?”

____________________

Whatever was left of YN’s consciousness recognized a few things in the next few hours. There was a shift in her weight— a grunt and a soft whisper that sounded safe. 

“YN? You with me, Lamb?” A man’s voice sounded and she could only furrow her brows in response, still shivering from the cold in her bones. 

“She’s going to be okay. Set her down by Bruce— throw the blanket over her shoulders so she can warm up a bit.” Uncle Tony, maybe? Clint?

“How is she so cold, anyway? It’s like, 104 degrees out.”

“Must have been something to do with what the witch did.”

“Scary. We should set Cricket down beside her. She seems a little restless.”

“What about Steve?” The man grunted as she was set down, a warm body pressed to her side and an even warmer blanket pulled over her shoulders. Warm. Safe. 

“Get him and Natasha closer to these guys. It’s time we made them actually lean against each other for once.”

“Wouldn’t that be nice.” There was a chuckle and a sound of a dragging body and a weight over her thighs. Heavy. Not Natasha. Steve. Safe. Grounding. 

“Where to, Clint?” Tony spoke, his voice sounding less and less far away. There was a shift of the weight on her lap and two, trunk-like arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her close. Safe. 

“Safehouse.”

Safe.

______________________________

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[freebooter4ever]

A continuation of the amazing Pirate Snafu AU for @persipneiwrites, this is like an explosion of my love for pirates and snafu and I couldnt contain it so pls take it, get it out of my head. read persipnei's original first cause basically gene just told snaf he was dying of scurvy to trick him into taking gene, who snaf had saved from a shipwreck, home. And now snaf has to decide to return to Mobile or continue on his quest.

In the light of impending mental uncertainty, Snafu does what he always does...retreat to the peace and quiet of his Captain's quarters to surround himself with all his favorite maps. There isn't a surface in the tiny cramped space not covered in maps. Large, detailed maps, with scribbly corrections done in Snafu's own writing. A lot of times the cartographers are going off theoretical knowledge when they chart the coastlines. Snafu, on the other hand, has the worldly experience necessary to fix them. He hasn't exactly gone everywhere yet, but he's gotten pretty close.

He shuffles through the papers with a little more force than is probably warranted to dig out an old handheld mirror. It's cracked, and weather beaten, but it'll do the trick. Baring his teeth in front of the glass he sticks a finger under his lip and pokes around. Nothing hurts exactly, but there is a tightness to his chest that makes him nervous. One tooth he pokes actually wiggles a little, and that makes him even more nervous.

He shoves open the cabin door and yells, "Burgie!"

His first mate appears almost instantly.

"Find his majesty. Send him to my cabin," Snafu says.

Burgie agrees, looking extremely tired.

Snafu shuts himself back in, sits on his bed (which takes up almost as much space as the maps) and continues turning the mirror this way and that, trying to get a better angle. He very nearly can see the backside of his teeth by the time Sledge finally quietly lets himself into the room.

"What do you want?" Sledge asks, sullen.

Snafu smirks. He knows Sledge still considers himself apart from the crew. The boy doesn't like it when Snafu tries to order him about.

Snafu gestures to the space in front of him, "You said your father's a doctor. I want a thorough examination."

"You're joking," Sledge deadpans.

Snafu kicks a velvet covered stool in Sledge's direction and leans back on his hands, waiting patiently.

Sledge sighs miserably and straddles the stool. He scoots forward until his knees knock against Snafu's. Snafu holds completely still, barely breathing, until Sledge gently takes hold of Snafu's jaw and guides his mouth open. Snafu would almost describe Sledge's touch as delicate, if he were the type to use such vocabulary.

"Your breath stinks," Sledge complains and completely ruins the mood Snafu is trying to build.

"Yeah?" Snafu grins.

Sledge rolls his eyes and focuses on the task at hand.

Sledge's hands are so soft, and clean. Too damn clean to be anywhere near Snafu's mouth. But Sledge examines Snaf's teeth and gums anyway, and has him move his tongue around to inspect every bit. It all seems very procedural and official. And by the end of it Snafu's left front teeth hurt like hell, right down to the bone.

So he isn't surprised by Sledge's eventual diagnosis.

Snafu makes the announcement right before dinner. He wears his biggest hat. Straps his sword to his belt for show. Usually he does without weaponry whole on the boat. He trusts his crew enough. They're like family. Better than, even.

His crew watches him, trustingly, as he tells them they'll be turning around. That the big score he's been planning for over six months will have to wait. It means longer hours with less food. And no recreational time at port.

As Snafu makes his speech, he eyes Eugene Sledge, who stands off in a corner, arms crossed, face set in stone. Snafu wonders if Sledge is aware just how costly his request actually is.

Snafu trusts his crew with his life. But in under four months the communal treasury will be gone, and if he hasn't replenished it by then, he will be gone too. They wouldn't kill him. But they'd leave him in the nearest port and take his ship, in which case he might as well be dead.

"We're going to Mobile, to see this Governor-Doctor," Snafu concludes, looking straight at Sledge while he does, "And if it turns out we don't got scurvy, we'll take his majesty's ransom" he pantomimes a salute to Sledge, "...and kill him."

The crew jeers. None of them like Sledge.

Snafu's eyes trail down Sledge's lean neck, watching intently as the man swallows. Snafu expected Sledge to be smug, triumphant. Instead all Snafu sees is fear.

Fear is not the look Snafu wants from Eugene Sledge, but it's the one he is used to.

Snafu returns to his quarters and locks the door.

He only reappears hours later, on the edge of twilight. The sun is no longer relentless, and the sea is calm for once. These evening hours have become his time to hold court. Wherever he ends up perching on the ship, his men will find him and air any grievances. It's a daily reminder that his Captaincy is communal rather than appointed. Even if he is the one with a formal claim to the ship.

He goes through three pirates with money troubles, two women having a domestic disagreement, and one man who had something to say about the cat - before Burgie finally slides in next to him. It's nearly dark, and this nook under the bow they're squatting in makes the shadows pitch black. It's similar to the opening of the tiny storage space Snafu first hid in as a kid. Not a lot of unused space on a ship. But a skinny half starved child can fit in almost any cranny with the right motivation. He had been caught halfway through the voyage, and forced to swab decks for the rest of the journey.

"You don't have it," Burgie says without preamble.

Snafu cuts his eyes towards his first mate with suspicion.

"Haven't you wondered why our crew has had zero cases since I came on board?" Burgie asks.

"Just thought we were lucky, I guess," Snafu drawls and takes a smoke.

"Last crew I sailed with, the Captain decided to do an experiment. After he went to Asia, he learned that lemons were said to be able to prevent scurvy on long voyages. So, he gave the crew of his command ship three spoonfuls of lemon juice every day while the rest of the ships in his fleet did without. The men on the other ships started dropping like flies. Most of them didn't make it. I had to transfer to another ship just to help bring her in to port. It was cruel, the conditions that bastard put us in. To use us as test cases. It was mere luck I ended up on the command ship. Switched with a friend. He held out till the final week before he succumbed," Burgie says, ''I jumped ship after that. Couldn't stay watching that kind of treatment and not be able to do anything about it."

"You say your last Captain made it to Asia?" Snafu asks.

That's where Snafu wants to go. The Pacific Ocean.

Burgie sighs, "Snaf, I ordered the cook to give everyone daily lemon rations for a reason. You don't have scurvy, and if you keep taking my elixir you never will. Eugene lied."

"Eugene Sledge," Snafu extends the name as long as it can go, testing his limits. He grins down at the water below him. "Pretty little rich boy with hair like copper. Do you think he's ginger down there too?"

Burgie scoffs and stands to leave, "If you're taking him home because you want to fuck him, fine. But don't pretend like you're doing this for the health of the crew."

"Everyone knows scurvy is a luck game," Snafu taunts, still grinning.

"If you'd rather trust luck than me, you better be careful before yours runs out," Burgie warns kindly. He turns his back on his Captain.

"Burgie?" Snafu stops him just before he goes.

Burgie turns, questioning.

"Don't tell nobody," Snafu says. His face grows somber and he looks his first mate dead in the eye, "I don't want to have to kill him."

Burgie looks sad. But he nods.

A couple nights later Snafu finds Sledge, after he's had some time to think.

"The sailors cut my hammock again," Sledge complains the minute Snafu sits down next to him.

Snafu doesn't answer. 

Sledge brought his troubles with the crew mostly on himself. He made no effort to learn anything about sailing, or to pitch in and lighten the duties of the sailors he's demanding work from as they take him home. He didn't even know enough about knots to tell when a rope has been cut or merely untied.

No one cuts rope on a ship unless it's an emergency.

Instead of saying all that, Snafu lights his rolled tobacco, and passes it to Sledge. 

Sledge characteristically refuses the smoke.

They sit in silence that's almost companionable for an entire watch. Some of the crew pass by, as if wanting to talk to their Captain, but no one bothers them. Eventually they're given a wide berth and left completely alone.

Snafu seizes his chance. He sucks in his bottom lip. Then releases it. "Liars never prosper," he says.

Sledge sits up very straight. "You're a pirate," the boy says, "thought all your old breed did was lie?"

"Naw," a smile drifts across Snafu's face despite himself, "Gotta stick to the code. No lying."

Eugene immediately gets defensive, "All I want is to go home. I'm not asking for anything else."

Snafu casts his eyes to the sky. He is sick of hearing the same line over and over. "You are," he says, exasperated, "Going home. So don't be dumb and tell the crew I don't have scurvy."

"Wasn't planning on it," Eugene snaps.

"Good," Snafu says, equally harsh.

"Glad we've come to an understanding then," Eugene quips.

It takes every good samaritan bone buried deep in Snafu's body to not shove Sledge off the ship's rail and into the water then and there.

Or maybe it's just that Snafu wants one certain good samaritan buried deep in him that he's being so unusually lenient. He's not thinking very straight at the moment.

"The offer to sleep in my quarters still stands," Snafu says calmly in a final answer to Sledge's first problem, "Bed's big enough for two."

Sledge laughs caustically.

"I won't try anything," Snafu says defensively. He finally looks Eugene in the eye to convey that he's being genuine. "I promise." Snafu's last two words are only slightly sarcastic which in his mind is a great sacrifice.

But Eugene is staring at him balefully with those big sullen eyes of his, and Snafu aches. It is unfair to want so much when the other person doesn't.

"How old are you?" Eugene asks, still glaring, and turning the non sequitur tables over on Snafu.

Snafu looks at him. Tries to take the man's soul out through his eyes and divine his motivations. Then Snaf laughs, as if it worked. "I stowed away on my first ship at twelve," he says, "Led my first mutiny at seventeen. That was a year ago. I guess that makes me eighteen."

"Jesus christ, you're younger than me," Sledge says all in one breath like a revelation.

"No one on this boat is more green than you, Sledge," Snafu points out.

The man in question ignores this comment. Instead he focuses on Snaf's age. "You don't look it. Eighteen, I mean."

Snafu arches his back with a bit of pride, "Probably because I'm the meanest asshole this side of the atlantic."

"You're not mean, you're just defensive," Sledge counters, "That's different than being malicious."

"All the men I sent down to Davy Jones' locker would probably argue otherwise," Snafu taunts. A smile is growing on his face and he doesn't know what to do about it.

"Yeah. Okay," Sledge teases, "You're a mean tough pirate, I know."

Snafu is really laughing now. He can't seem to stop. It comes in bursts, like the waves far below his feet. Like all the joy he's had stuffed inside him burst free for this one moment of absurdity. One moment when a pampered, second son dandy sees straight through Snafu's artifice and is entertained by it.

Somehow, in the midst of Snafu's fit, Eugene starts laughing too. So they chuckle together as the sun sets, co-conspirators in lies they both started. And when Snafu turns his face away from the glare and happens to glance at Eugene, there's a smile on Eugene's face. And something in his eyes that terrifies Snafu. But the kind of terror that feels a little like hope.

"Why aren't you going to send me down to Davy Jones along with the rest?" Eugene asks.

Snafu slides off the rail and back onto the deck. He stands a few feet away, clinging to a rope for support, to admire Eugene's profile lit by the remaining sunlight. "You're too pretty to die, Sledge," Snafu winks.

 He returns to his quarters alone.

 He leaves his door unlocked.

Sometime in the night, Eugene must have snuck inside.

Because it's only when Snafu wakes with the sun and rolls over to discover a tuft of red hair on the pillow next to him that the pirate captain realizes it might be worse to have Eugene Sledge so near and off limits than to not have him in his bed at all.

Eugene Sledge sleeps peacefully. Exactly how Snafu might have imagined a Governor's son would. And deep inside, somewhere near that good samaritan bone of his, Snafu wants to preserve that innocence.

It's why he's taking the man home.

[jolienjoyswriting]

Mortem In Contumeliam FFVI, Ch. I

Chapter 1 of "Mortem In Contumeliam Final Fantasy VI," a Final Fantasy VI fan fiction story.

Did'ja like the recap of the events leading into this chapter?  I thought that'd be a good way to open it, considering how much of the game's plot the story actually skips.  Plus, you get some idea of how the soldiers are!  Hee hee.

That said, here's where the plot truly begins.

Word count: 3,257 – Character count: 19,017 Originally written: July 15th, 2019

Following a failed mission, Wedge and Biggs find themselves in hot water with their commanding officer only to be rescued by a timely intervention by an unexpected source.

Final Fantasy VI, Wedge, Biggs, and related characters, scenarios, and properties created by Square Soft, Inc. and © Square Enix Co, Ltd.

[ ← Prev. Chapter | Next Chapter → ]

    “How’s the soup treating you, now, partner?”     “You shut the he– blargh!!”     Biggs grinned to himself.     “Serves you right for gorging yourself on good will.”

    Two Imperal soldiers, Wedge and Biggs, had been assigned to a mission in Narshe.  After failing their mission – and, somehow, losing their armor and equipment – they found their way to the House of New Beginnings and scrounged together some simple clothing, such as jackets and slacks.  Once they’d left the snowy plains, they trekked across the neighboring desert, made their way through a cave that cuts through the mountains, and found themselves in South Figaro.     In that small port town, Wedge unsuccessfully attempted to strongarm a ship’s captain to ferry them to Alburg… only for his more sensible partner to intervene and ask if any shipments were heading there.  A week later, a cargo freighter headed out to sea, the two soldiers working as part of its crew.

    “I’ll have you know…”     Wedge paused to groan, then straightened up after emptying his stomach’s contents over the ship’s rail.     “I’ll have you know,” he started again, “that it wasn’t the soup.  I’m just seasick.”     “Yeah, and you probably wouldn’t be as seasick if you hadn’t eaten twice your weight in gysahl green soup.”     “Ugh, don’t remind– ah… hwargh!!”     Biggs crossed his arms, scowling as his partner tossed his cookies overboard, again.     “Nice, Wedge…  Real nice.”     “Hey, Biggs… got somethin’ for ya.”     The taller of the two men narrowed his eyes.  Wedge had reached into his coat pocket.     “If it’s what I assume it is…”     The shorter man grinned… then, pulled his hand out, making a rude gesture at Biggs.     “Yeah… keep that to yourself.”     “Heh… hoo-hoo-nooo– gwaugh!!”

    Wedge and Biggs worked hard for the ship’s captain, helping to move cargo, fix leaks in the holds of the cargo ship, and even managed to parlay for some extra supplies with a ship going the other way.  Despite his seasickness, Wedge made sure to work the hardest, not wanting to let “some dumb thing like an upset stomach” keep him from earning his way.  Ironically, he did manage to get his sea legs… though, only an hour before the ship arrived at Alburg.

    After docking, every member of the ship’s crew helped unload the cargo.  When a pair of Magitek Armor units came in with a large wagon, the two soldiers-in-disguise decided they should take their leave.     “Well, boys… I was skeptical, but you two really proved your worth, and then some!”     The ship’s captain stroked his beard, smiling at the two as they clambered into the wagon.     “It’s a shame you two have somewhere to be!  I could use some reliable seamen like you on every trip!”     “Yeah, well…”  Wedge chuckled with a laugh.

    “If we’re ever in need of ferry back to Figaro and happen to cross paths,” Biggs told the captain, “we’ll be happy to help, again.”     “I’ll keep that in mind!” the captain laughed.  He grinned at Wedge, then, as he said, “Remember, salty crackers are good for a queazy stomach, mate.”     “Yeah, yeah…” the shorter man said with a wave of his hand and a grin of his own.     “Well… I have to get back to my crew and I imagine you two have your own business, here.  Take care, gents!”     “See ya, Captain!  Thanks for having us!”     “Until the wind brings us seaward, once more,” Biggs added.     With that, the captain returned to the dock.

    “Boy… the commander is gonna be thrilled to see you two.”     At the sound of a new voice, both Biggs and Wedge leaned out from inside the wagon.  Standing at the back was a soldier wearing the green armor denoting the rank of “cadet.”     “Pierre,” Biggs greeted.     “Pierre?  Pierre!”  Wedge brightly smiled.  “What a coincidence!  You’re a courier, now, huh?  Man, I didn’t think you could get demoted any harder!”     Pierre scowled at the two… which just made Wedge smirk.     “You know, I’d normally tell you what to shove and where, but…”  The cadet smugly smiled.  “I’m in a puh-retty good mood, today.”     “Is that so?”     “Yup.  As I said, the commander is going to be thrilled to see you two.  Out-of-uniform.  Two weeks late to report back.  No Magitek Armor.  No Eidolon.  No witch.”     “Hold on…”     Biggs leaned down wearing a look of genuine interest.     “‘Eidolon?’  ‘Witch?’”     “Oh, don’t play dumb!  It’s all over the Imperial Castle!  You blew it!”     “What’d we do?” Wedge casually asked, much to Pierre’s continued frustration.     “You two idiots were assigned to a simple task: go to Narshe… retrieve the reported Eidolon from wherever it was… come back.  It was a mission that even you two couldn’t screw up – or, so we thought!  Kind’a wonder why they gave you that fire witch to play with, though…”

    “We were supposed to retrieve an Eidolon from Narshe…?” Biggs asked, sounding genuinely confused.     “What did I just say?” was Pierre’s short response.     “Hey, Biggs…”     The soldier looked to his companion.     “I think… yeah, I remember something about some… magic thingy…  Didn’t we find some sort of ugly turkey frozen in ice?”     “‘Ugly turkey…?’”  Biggs paused… then, he asked, “Wait, are you talking about Valigarmanda, the Bird of Disaster?”     “I have no damn idea what you’re talking about, partner,” Wedge chuckled.  “All I remember was some ugly bird… then, I think… a bright light?  Next thing I know, we were tied up and left-for-dead in some gods-forsaken mineshaft!”     “Sounds like the witch gave you the slip…  So much for that Slave Crown!  Hah!”

    Both Biggs and Wedge turned their attention back to Pierre.  He had his arms crossed over his chest and wore another smirk.     “What do you mean, ‘Slave Crown?’” the former asked.     “Oh, hey!  That’s right!”     He blinked as Wedge suddenly spoke up, then looked right at him.     “That girl that supposedly toasted fifty cadets riding Magitek Armor…  She was with us!  And, she was wearing a Slave Crown!”     “‘Slave Crown…’” Biggs repeated before asking, “Do you two mean the ‘Puppeteer’s Wheel’ that General Palazzo had Doctor Marquez make?”     “Yeah,” his partner replied. “Most of us just call it a ‘Slave Crown,’ though, ‘cause–”     “Because, it makes the wearer your slave,” his partner finished.     “Except, this time…” Pierre interjected, drawing their attention back his way, “it didn’t work and she gave you the slip!”     The cadet grinned from-ear-to-ear, wringing his hands together.     “I can’t wait to see what the commander has to say about this!”

    Before either soldier could respond, they felt the wagon lurch, its cargo shift, and the whole unit begin to move.  It wasn’t long before the familiar clank of metallic feet on rocky dirt and green grass could be heard echoing in their ears.  They were on the move.     As they left the town, the soldiers noticed Pierre giving them a farewell wave… or, making a certain gesture – they weren’t quite sure but, either way, it didn’t matter.  After hearing that he had to say… they had quite a few other things to think about.

    “We were sent to Narshe…” Biggs said from a seated position on a random box of weapons, “and… we were supposed to retrieve that Eidolon.”     “If… it was there,” Wedge added as he watched the countryside roll by, backward.  “I remember, now: we were there to investigate, first, and reclaim, if it was actually there.”     The taller soldier crossed his arms and hummed…     “Do you really think the Puppeteer’s Wheel failed and that… witch… attacked us?”     “Seems pretty unlikely, partner,” Wedge replied.  “Before we left, I did some reading on the Slave Crown and, from what I understand, it not only blocks thought, emotion, and memory… but, it’s been known to actually erase the wearer’s mind if they wear it for too long!”     “So, what you’re saying is… that witch could never have turned against us.”     “Pretty much!”  He turned around, leaning against the wagon’s tailgate.  “Even if the Crown broke, she would’ve been too dazed-and-confused to attack.  Hell, even if she did…”     He grinned, then he ran his thumb across his throat with a gurgling croak.

    “So, then…”  The other soldier looked up with a worried expression.  “What was that light?  And… how did she get away from us?  Where did our powered armor go?  Where did our equipment go, for that matter?”     “I guess it’s possible that we didn’t kill that big-ass slug thing…  Maybe, it woke up and zapped us, good?  That much electricity could’ve blown up our Magitek Armor…”     “I… do remember hearing some sort of explosion, now that you mention it…”     Both soldiers looked down at the metallic floor of the wagon and hummed.     “This… is going to be hard to explain to the commander.” –––––

    “Boobs!  Idiots!  Clods!!”

    Not long after the wagon arrived at Vector, the two errant soldiers made their way to the barracks.  Before they could even think of slipping back into the standard-issue brown armor of their rank… they found themselves confronted by a very angry, somewhat-round man wearing black commander’s armor.

    “I should have you court marshaled…” he ranted as the two soldiers stood at attention.  “I should have you strung up!  I should have you shot out of a cannon and into the sun!!”     “Doc Cid finally made that ‘Sun Cannon,’ eh…?”     “Siiiiilence!!”     Wedge jolted with a “yip.”  The commander was right in his face… so close that he could smell the tuna salad he’d been eating for lunch.  After a minute of intense staring, though, he leaned back and returned to pacing in front of them.

    “How-the-hell did you two imbeciles manage to bungle this mission up so badly…?”     “We… don’t know, sir,” Biggs cautiously told him.     “What?  What?!”     Just like before, the commander was pressing his face up against his soldier’s face.     “What do you mean, ‘we don��t know?’” he asked in a mocking tone.  “Explain!!”     “Well, sir…” Wedge started, getting another faceful of the black helmet and fish-and-onion smell as he spoke, “the thing of it is… we were ambushed!”     “Great, just great!” the round man shouted and he stepped away.  “Two highly-trained soldiers, equipped with the most state-of-the-art weapons in the world, got ‘ambushed…’ and, they don’t remember how or by who!  Furthermore…!”     For no apparent reason, he got back in Biggs’ face.     “Where.  The hell.  Is the witch you were assigned?!”     “We… uh… don’t know, sir,” Biggs answered.     “You don’t– heh…  Heh-heh.  Ha ha hah!  Oooh, good golly, Miss Molly…”     Both soldiers blinked, glancing at each other as their C.O. stepped back and started laughing.  Before long, it became awkwardly infectious.  However…     “Stooooop laughing!!”     Biggs and Wedge straightened up, going stiff as boards!  The commander had drawn his blade and was threateningly waving it at them.  His face was red and, even with the helmet hiding his eyes, the two could tell that he was boiling over with rage!

    “You two…!  Do you have any idea what General Palazzo is going to do to you once he hears you lost his pet project?!”  The commander paused… then, he started rubbing his neck before nervously asking, “D-do you know what he’s going to do to me…?”     “No, but I’m always open to suggestion!”     “What?  Oh… sh–”

    Suddenly, all color left the commander’s face.  Both he and the soldiers had heard the familiar, shrill voice of someone that none of them wanted to cross… much less, interact with.  Unfortunately… the owner of that voice was walking right toward them.

      By all rights… the tall, slender man looked like a cross between a nobleman and a clown.  From his unusual, white face with black eyeshadow and red circling his mouth, to the garish, striped collar hanging around his shoulders over his puffy, crimson tunic, and the pointy, oddly-colored boots he wore that matched the sun-colored cloak on his back, he really didn’t seem like someone you'd expect to see in the military.  Even the way he acted, always laughing and smiling in a most-deranged way, made it seem like he should have been a performer… or, as some thought, locked away.  But, all three enlisted men… in fact, the entire Gestahlian Empire… knew that this man… General Kefka Palazzo… was no laughing matter.

    “Gr-r-r-reetings, peons!” the clown-like figure trilled.  “What’s new?”     “G-G-G-General Palazzo!”     The man in the black armor spun around, immediately kneeling before his superior officer.  Both Biggs and Wedge followed suit.     “W-w-what a surprise to see you in the barracks!!” he continued.  “I-I-I– what brings you down from your tower…?!”     “What brings me down?  Bad news, mostly!” Kefka told him as he took ginger, almost-feminine steps in a circle around the man.  “I certainly do hate bad news!  Why… anytime someone brings me bad news, I just come apart at the seams!”     He squeezed his arms, hugging himself tight and giving a little whimper.     “You would never give me any bad news…”     Kefka had leaned down, his mouth right next to the other man’s covered ear and his body practically pressing against his black armor.  A second later, he whispered…     “Would you…?”     “I… I… I…”     “Good!”

    All-at-once, Kefka spun away… once… twice… three times, before coming to a stop and putting his hands behind his back.  He took a simple standing position, looking ready to take things seriously, then.

    “Sooo…?”  He offered a friendly smile to the commander.  “Rise, Commander, and tell… did your men find anything of worth in that block of ice on the Figaro region?”     The commander gave a hard swallow as he got to his feet.  After taking a moment to catch his breath, he said…     “M-m-my men can tell you what they found, Sir!”     Neither Wedge not Biggs looked forward to that, and the former was especially annoyed at being thrown under the carriage like that.  However…     “I’d much rather hear it from yooou…”     Kefka batted his eyes and continued to smile at the commander, which just made him feel even more uncomfortable.     “Th… they haven’t told me everything,” the unnerved officer admitted.  “But–”     “Then, just tell me what you know, so far!  If there are any gaps…”     He narrowed his eyes and flashed a wicked grin.     “We’ll make a bridge to cross them.”     From anyone else… that wouldn’t have sounded like a threat.

    “W-well, Sir…” the commander started.  “A-according to my men – who are two weeks overdue, by the way!!”     Biggs and Wedge jolted on their feet.     “Narshe did, indeed, have a frozen Eidolon.  A–”     “Spleeendid!!” the general said with a smile and a clap of his hands.  “Go on, go on!”     “A… and, Sir… they, uh… failed to capture it?”     “Oh?”     Kefka relaxed his stature, then casually walked over to the commander.     “What happened?” he asked in an innocent tone while leaning in.  “Tell me, tell me!”     “They… uh… were… ambushed, according to their report?”     “Oh, dear!!”     The man with the white face suddenly whipped back, clasping his open hands against his cheeks and looking aghast!     “What happened, next?!”     “Y… yes, well,” the commander continued, “this is where things get a little… gap-y.”     Kefka crossed his arms, though raised a hand under his chin as he nodded.     “A-after they were ambushed… they, uh… woke up without any of their gear, nor their Magitek Armor…  A-and…”     “Mm-hmm, mm-hmm?  Go on?”     He paused to take a deep breath… then, he quietly confessed, “Th-the witch was gone.”     “Crafty she-devil!”

    The brightly-dressed man hopped away, then he pulled his arms around his back before pacing along the alleyway between rows of beds.     “Clearly, something went wrong with the Slave Crown!” he surmised aloud.     “See, even General Kefka calls it that!”  Wedge whispered to his companion.  Biggs just flustered and hushed him before looking tense.     “Ooh, I knew Cid wasn’t up to the task, the buffoon!  Although…”     Kefka spun around, looking at the commander with his head on one hand, again.     “The device worked fine when I made her kill all those soldiers…”     The one soldier went wide-eyed.  “So, it is true…!” he whispered.     “Sh-shut up, Wedge…!” his companion excitedly murmured.     “Then, when I was teaching her how to operate the Magitek Armor,” the general continued, “she seemed to catch on, lickety-split!  Maybe, the crown was damaged in combat?”     He brought a hand down, slapping his fist into it and wearing a wide-eyed expression.     “Yes, yes, that must be what happened!”     Suddenly, he did a forward-flip and landed right in front of the commander, startling him.     “I know a thing or two about ‘broken crowns,’” he said, unironically, “and, if that toy Doctor Cid cooked up did, indeed, break… then…”     He gestured at the two soldiers, causing them to wince.     “She could have attacked these poor, unfortunate souls and left them behind!     Kefka clasped his hands together, resting them next to his tilted head and giving the soldiers a sympathetic look.     “So sad!”

    “S… so, uh, General Palazzo…?”     Slowly… much too slowly… Kefka turned his attention back to the commander…  There was an unsettling look on the general’s face… one that was almost murderous…     “E’yeeeees…?” he said as his expression dramatically brightened.     “What… uh… what do we do?  I mean, where do we go from here, Sir?”     “Well!”     Kefka took a step back, then adjusted his cloak.     “Li’l ol’ me is going to go tell the big boss what happened, then I guess he’ll start a search for our little toy where you idiots lost her!  But, as for you?”     The wicked grin from earlier found its way back onto his face.     “I have plans, my dear commander… such marvelous plans, indeed!”     After saying that, Kefka just stood there, not moving and not saying a word for the longest time.  The enlisted men wanted to say something… but, not-a-one of them dared to.

    “Well?!”     Everyone jumped as Kefka suddenly stomped his feet and threw his arms out.     “Aren’t any of you morons curious about my wonderful plans?!”     “I-I kind of am…” Wedge said before Biggs could stop him.  And, just like that…     “You!  What’s your name?!”     Biggs, to his complete shock, found his view obscured by a face with a huge smile.

    “Sir!” he alertly called.  “Biggs Da–”     “‘Sir Biggsda,’ my lad!”     He winced as Kefka quickly pulled him into a one-armed side-hug.     “How would you like to be known as…”  He waved a hand in front of them.  “‘The Soldier Who Conquered Doma?!’”     “I…  Th-that’s…” Biggs stiffly said with a stammer.  “I-it would be an honor, S-Sir…?”     “Perfect!  Commander!!”     As Kefka left him to walk back over to his C.O, Biggs practically deflated with relief…     “Get all the troops you can!  Eight, twelve, twenty – whatever!  Tell ‘em, tonight…”     He shimmied with excitement.     “We’re gonna paint the castle red!  Red with the blood of those Doma dopes, that is!”     “Er… uh… yeh– yes, Sir!” the commander responded with a salute.     “Good, good!”  He rubbed his hands together.  Then, suddenly… “Well, it’s been fun!”     He spun around, then casually walked out of the barracks.     “But, I’ve got to fly, boys…” he told the trio.  “Ready the troops, then wait for my word!  I’ve got plans – oh, yes, such plans – plans the likes of which you wouldn’t even believe!  Ooh, just thinking about it makes me tingle!  Hee-hee… ha-ha-haaah!!”     With that… he was gone.

    “W… well?!  You heard him!!”     Wedge and Biggs both jolted.  Just like that, the commander was back to his confident, blustering, temperamental self.     “Get your asses in gear – literally – and, round up some troops!  Tonight… we attack Doma Castle!  I guess?  Hell, I don’t know – j-just get everyone ready!”     And, before long… the two were left alone in the barracks.

[fuwafuwagem]

Random HCs

I tend to come up with dumb headcanons/AU’s when I’m bored. All these were first posted on MMA, and now I’m inflicting them on you too ^^

Hacker MC

MC is actually a rival hacker of 707 who was brutally tortured after failing a mission because of him. She was recruited to Mint Eye, completely out of her mind, violent and psychotic, but she was made controllable by Saeran after taking the elixir. She actually plans to get her revenge on Seven once she is sure she has his complete trust. Saeran is still working alongside her...

Divorced Juju

Jumin... is divorced!

He got married to a his first girlfriend as soon as they came of age as a way of rebelling against his father and the expectations that had been placed upon him!

The marriage was covered up to avoid a scandal and quickly resulted in divorce.

The only people who know about this are V and Jumin’s father 🤭

Jumin’s dad occasionally makes payments to the former Mrs Han to keep her silent

Obviously this is all very unlikely, but I just really like the idea of Jumin doing something totally un-Jumin-like as a younger man lol

Kitty Love

Elizabeth 3rd attends the RFA party and meets Longcat. The two kitties fall madly in love, but evil Daddy Jumin will not allow his precious pet to be courted by such a common cat, no matter how famous he is!

What follows is a Romeo & Juliet style affair between the two animals which may or may not result in their death.

Honestly, I just want to ship the cats 🤣

Join me on this ship to nowhere! All aboard

Poor Zen

Zen wakes up after a psychic dream where he saw himself in love with MC, living together, making a future together, being happy~

But it is the day of her wedding to Yoosung, and what Zen saw was the future he shares with her in his route, a future that this version of Zen will never know, and he is utterly crushed by that knowledge because he knows he will never love another person the way that he loves the woman he cannot have.

Oh dear Zenny~

We all know that Zen had a difficult childhood and went off the rails a bit~

But...

What if, during those rebellious years, he fathered a child, but he was never told about it?

A one night stand with a girl he never saw again??

But once he becomes famous, the girl recognises him and brings his child to meet him~

MC is the one who answers the door, her eyes meet that piercing red eyed stare she is so familiar with~

But these eyes belong to a child of barely 4 years old~

The reality sets in~

“I think... we need to talk...”

Not Twins????

Saeyoung and Saeran are not actually twins~

They are clones

They were created in a secret research lab run by C&R, and V is the head researcher working on the project.

Rika, a young scientist, couldn’t stand to see the boys being lied to and ran away with as many as the research specimens as she could to form a home at Magenta. She managed to save Saeran, but V got to Saeyoung before he could be rescued.

After discovering the truth about himself, Saeran and the other clones called themselves Believers and formed a group named Mint Eye, so they would never forget the monster who created them.

They worship Rika as their saviour.

Away from the lab, the clones cannot survive without taking a special elixir that stops their organs from shutting down. It is painful for the clones to drink, but without it they would die within a few days.

Rika is trying to find a better alternative whilst also keeping the clones safe from V and C&R.

She hopes to one day save Saeyoung too ️

Someone told me this sounded like a show called Orphan Black. I watched it and it is so good! Recommended TV right there ^^

Drunk Boiz

Zen and Yoosung are having a drink at Zen’s place.

They get into an argument (probably about V) and Yoosung goes to sulk on the couch while Zen decides to go to bed.

Yoosung formulates a drunken plan, because he’s fed up of Zen treating him like a child whose opinions don’t matter~

He tiptoes into Zen’s room, armed with scissors and a razor, cuts of Zen’s ponytail and shaves off one eyebrow.

Zen wakes up the next morning and almost has a total breakdown.

Yoosung feels guilty as hell but doesn’t know how to help.

They try to create an eyebrow using makeup, but Zen is never happy with the result.

Zen refuses to leave the house until the brow has grown back and Yoosung does all the chores as a way of apologising.

Zen doesn’t mind having short hair, but plans to grow it back.

He forgives Yoosung, but vows never to drink with him again~

Buff Juju

It’s in his head and he can’t get it out.

That picture.

That physique.

He wants it!

No not like that~

Jumin has been thinking of this picture since he first received it by mistake, and decides to finally take action.

One month after the success of the RFA party, he quits his job in a shock move and announces that he strives to become a bodybuilder!!

Cut to five years later and~

It’s Jumin, of course he was successful.

The world loves buff boi Jumin Han

[mst3kproject]

504: Secret Agent Super Dragon

Let’s move on to another oft-overlooked subset of MST3K – the Budget Bond films.  These are always very bad, but often a lot of fun if you’re in the right kind of mood.

Brian Cooper is Super Dragon, pulled out of retirement to find out who’s distributing poisoned chewing gum to co-eds!  Boy, if that doesn’t sound like the setup for a thrilling spy caper, nothing does!  The plot seems to revolve around a Dutch student named Christine Bruder, so Cooper goes to Amsterdam looking for her.  There, in between fucking his female colleagues and flirting with every woman he sees, he learns that Bruder was part of a plot to smuggle deadly drugs into the United States, hidden in fake Ming vases.  An evil conspiracy is planning to dope the free world on a chemical that will cause us to violently attack one another, and then… uh, I don’t know what happens after that, but it’s probably safe to assume it’ll end in the bad guys ruling the world.  That’s always the goal.

What’s with that spy movie cliché about the glamorous secret agent who sleeps with every woman he meets?  Friends, enemies, co-workers, random waitresses… our suave hero loses no chance to insert Tab A into Slot B.  He can’t walk down the street without having women throw themselves at him.  This trope has been parodied to hell and back in everything from Austin Powers to The Million Eyes of Sumuru and it’s actually sort of weird to see it played straight, as it is here.  As a PSA to my readers: never sleep with a glamorous secret agent.  He probably has like nine venereal diseases.

The weirdest thing in the movie is a facet of this trope: it’s the bit where Cooper and Agent Farrell are busily smooching when a man breaks into her apartment and tries to kill them.  They fight him off, and he commits suicide so they can’t question him.  Cooper then throws his body out the window, turns the soundtrack back on, and the couple just pick up where they left off!  Maybe it’s because I’m not a glamorous secret agent but I gotta agree with Tom Servo on this one: I don’t think I could have sex in the same room where I just watched a guy kill himself. It wouldn’t be right, you know?

I will say that this indifference towards death bothers me less here than it did in Master Ninja I, but the characters in Secret Agent Super Dragon have presumably have years of both physical training to kill and psychological coaching to deal with the consequences. Even so, just getting right back to the makeout session before the body’s even had a chance to cool seems unnecessarily callous.

The other trope I notice a lot of in Secret Agent Super Dragon is the death trap. Our hero’s life is threatened repeatedly but always in some contrived way that allows him a chance to escape. The first time he’s tied to a rail so some machine can come along and roll over his head.  He gets out in the nick of time and it crushes a can of red paint instead.  The second time he’s nailed into a coffin and thrown into the river.  He holds his breath and inflates a flotation device. The third time, he’s trapped in a building rigged to explode.  His buddy flies in with a helicopter.  Why doesn’t anybody just shoot this guy? Villains that stupid don’t deserve to take over the world!

Yet another thing that stands out as remarkably dumb is the cause the charity auction is supposed to support – ‘an International Hospital for Babies with Malnutrition’.  Okay, so, imagine you’re somebody whose child is starving, which probably means you’re dirt poor.  Instead of sending food to you, these people expect you to bring the baby to a hospital, which may be in another country, so that they can feed the kid there. Is the complete impracticality of this supposed to be our clue that it’s a scam?  The script never references that, though.  Did somebody just pick a bunch of charitable-sounding words?  Was it a bad translation of something that actually made sense in the original language?  Are the writers just that stupid?  We’ll probably never know.

Beyond that… it’s honestly really hard to say anything deeper about Secret Agent Super Dragon, because this is another movie that’s not very ambitious. It has some vague themes about drugs as the downfall of western civilization, but its characters don’t have appreciable arcs and there’s not much by way of symbolism for me to analyze. All it wants is to keep us mindlessly entertained for an hour and a half – and there’s nothing wrong with that, honestly, but Super Dragon isn’t even any good at it.  Trying to watch without Joel and the bots I found myself drifting repeatedly.  There’s the charming super-spy, the parade of blandly beautiful women, the evil mastermind with a vague plan to take over the world, the easily-escaped death traps… we’ve done this all before, and Super Dragon doesn’t even use the stereotypes in skillful or interesting ways.

The thing about spy movie tropes is they’re so easy to parody, and have been parodied so many times, that even somebody who doesn’t actually watch spy movies can spot them because we all absorb them through pop-culture osmosis.  Playing them straight therefore runs a very serious risk of boring the audience.  Of course Agent Farrell is working for the bad guys, because in a story like this, a character like her does – and of course she falls in love with Cooper and betrays her bosses for him.  None of this stuff is even really foreshadowed (except that Farrell dyes her hair – can’t trust those unnatural redheads!) but we still know it’s coming because we’ve seen the same shit in fifty other movies. The bad guy wants to cleanse the world so it can be made anew?  Been there. The movie wallows in misogyny but in all the same old ways, so I’ve got nothing new to say about it.

Throughout the film people talk about the ‘legendary Super Dragon’ but I don’t think we ever get a reason why Cooper’s so great.  Bond films begin with a breathtaking action setpiece to show us that our hero has nifty gadgets and balls of steel – Secret Agent Super Dragon begins with Cooper playing dead by the pool.  His most remarkable ability seems to be holding his breath for a really long time, and his gadgeteer, the kleptomaniacal Babyface, makes most of his gadgets out of literal toys.  I think this might be a joke about the obvious miniatures some of these movies use… but I’m not sure.  All I’m sure of is when that dinosaur waddled into the room I was halfway expecting it to demand the return of the Golden Ninja Warrior.

About the only place where the movie seems to accidentally brush by a real statement is in a moment that resembles a historical reference.  Cooper has infiltrated a conspiracy meeting (by wearing a half-mask that leaves his rather distinctive chin fully visible) at which the Big Bad, Mr. Lamas, is delivering an expository monologue: their factory in India is in full production of the drug, which will be shipped to America in phony Ming vases and bring the world to its knees!  If you’re going to talk about drugs making and breaking empires, China and India are where it happened.

In the late eighteenth and early nineteenth centuries, the East India Company fostered opium addiction in China because they wanted cheap tea and because the British government had vague plans, which never came anywhere close to fruition, to add China to their empire.  The opium to feed this addiction was grown in India, often by farmers who would rather have been growing actual food but owed too much money to the EIC. This all led to the Opium Wars and a lot of other unpleasantness in which the British Empire came out looking even more like assholes than they usually did.  In a story about conquering the world through drug addiction, then, having the drugs created in India and slipped into something Chinese looks like a reference to history repeating itself.

It may also mean something else.  Secret Agent Super Dragon is relentlessly white, set mostly in a city in northwestern Europe, where conspiracies of middle-aged white guys drink booze and decide the fate of nations.  The actual work that makes this possible, however, is being done by people of colour in the east.  Not only does this seem to reference how western nations use other countries as battlegrounds and bargaining chips in their own power struggles, it can also serve as a reminder of something we frequently forget: a lot of what makes our comfortable lives possible comes from other countries, made by people who could never afford to buy it.  My eyeglasses, the sweater I’m wearing, and the chair I’m sitting on were all made in China.  Our entire economy depends on cheap foreign labor, and I wonder sometimes how much longer that can last before the whole thing falls apart.

Is any of this the movie’s intentional theme or message?  I doubt it. The historical reference seems to be just a ‘hey, look how clever we are!’ moment and the rest probably goes no deeper than ‘oh, no, our children are doing drugs!’, which has been on the verge of ending civilization since at least the thirties.  Secret Agent Super Dragon is just a dumb trashy Eurospy movie, and not even a very good one.  I don’t hate it, but mostly because it’s not worth that kind of effort.  The MST3K treatment renders it infinitely more enjoyable, especially when Tom and Crow do Jazz.

Agent Cooper was played by actor Ray Danton, who died in 1992, a year before the episode aired.  Probably all for the best.  I doubt he’d have been into all those jokes about how his character is perfectly smooth.

[its-love-u-asshole]

Salt Water and Seasickness [fic]

Summary: Tsukishima was used to being a stowaway. He was used to being on the run, surviving whatever life threw at him. So how he had ended up on the most dangerous pirate king's ship was a little beyond him. 

Rating: T

Tags: pirate au, first meetings, minor depictions of blood/violence bc yeah Kuroo plunders towns n things, but he’s still a nerd...just a vicious one 

Note: This fic is a commission for one of my favorite people @serviceace  <3 Pinta is amazing and this fic is based off some hcs she thought up, and that I’m so happy I got to write! I hope you enjoy, and thanks to @emeraldwaves for reading this over! 

AO3

The abused wood of the damp floor creaked and moaned under the weight of the ship, and Tsukishima wondered if it were possible for the rafters to cave in, crushing him.

Maybe he'd be better off that way.

There were no windows down here, far below deck, only a leaking roof and the picturesque view of rats scurrying across the floor. It stunk of fish and preserved rations, and Tsukishima's bare feet scraped against the chipped wood. He grimaced at the sensation, and coupled with the stench, his skin felt as though it would crawl up and off his body.

There was a rumbling crash of thunder, and the ship swayed violently on the restless sea. Thank god Tsukishima didn't get sea sick.

But he did get cold easily, and he huddled in on himself, shaking. His waistcoat and undershirt were still soaked, even though he'd been hiding in the ship ever since it left the last port, eight hours prior. Something told him he'd never be dry, but he was used to it. The cold hadn't killed him yet, no matter how torturous it was for his body.

Tsukishima was no stranger to harsh conditions, and he could bitch and whine as good as the rest of them, but at the end of the day he survived. He would be the last one standing when the world went up in flames, not from any kind of bravery or determination, but from pure stubbornness.

That's probably why he had no qualms about stowing away on the ship of the sea's most feared pirate king, known for slaughtering a thousand men without any unnecessary blade strokes.

Tsukshima said he was stubborn, not smart. Though...he wasn't a slouch in that department either. He might've been kicked out of medical school, but not for shitty grades. He'd been top of his class, and those skills kept him alive.

At the thought of coming face to face with the blood red pirate king Kuroo Tetsurou, Tsukishima couldn't help but glare at the mold growing on the ship's beams.

I'd like to see him try to kill me.

That was far from a reasonable thought, or an admirable one. Not like he had any use for either. But with any luck, Tsukishima would never have to meet this Kuroo Tetsurou, nor the calamity which seemed to follow him everywhere.

--

Tsukishima remembered the first time he'd seen Kuroo destroy a town.

In fact, he was no stranger to seeing pirate fleets loot and ransack homes and businesses. Kuroo's raid wasn't the first he'd seen, but it had been the first to make him stop and stare.

Usually, raids were predictable. Some fire here, some bloodshed there...it was so gruesome and gritty that after a while, Tsukishima became numb to it. As long as he knew where to hide, knew how to negotiate...he'd be safe. What happened to the rest of the town couldn't be of his concern. He wasn't a hero.

So when the notorious Kuroo Tetsurou washed ashore with his swords and guns, the smell of ash and soot wafting along the sea edge, Tsukishima knew what to expect.

And for a while, things were normal. Kuroo's crew devastated the town guard in what felt like mere minutes. True to legend, Kuroo's swords must've been forged from the finest metal out there, because they cut through flesh and sinew like butter. Blood streamed down the roads, polluting the springs until they ran crimson, but nothing looked as grisly as Kuroo himself.

The sun kissed his tan skin, but the angelic rays didn't take away from his grim appearance. Actually, the contrast almost made the captain look inhuman, like a demon, or Ares himself. The red coat he wore bore gold accents, like a flame, and it danced in the wind as Kuroo's sword pierced the chest of a soldier.

Kuroo's pure white undershirt was drenched with blood, stretched open to expose his discolored chest.

Oh. No, not discolored. Battle scars. Trophies. Proof that no matter how many men had tried, no one could kill him. Kuroo's grin was triumphant, no trace of disgust or displeasure there at all. Tsukishima had never seen a pirate king look so pleased during a slaughter. Maybe after. Maybe when he got a particularly good kill in. But to just smile like that...Tsukishima was entranced from the start.

Kuroo's hair stood up at horrid angles, but rather than tremble in fear over the captain's potentially surly nature, Tsukishima had the urge to smooth the mess down with salt water.

Tsukishima recalled Kuroo's image in vivid detail, because he'd made the mistake of standing directly in his path.

Tsukishima hadn't meant to, he'd simply wandered down the wrong road at the wrong time. Bodies sat strewn in the street, and most homes were boarded up for families to hide in them. But Tsukishima had tried to get away instead of seeking shelter, and it could've cost him his life. One turn down what he thought would be a desolate road brought him face to face with Kuroo, pulling out his sword from another body.

Tsukishima didn't consider himself to scare easily anymore, but he felt his heart drop to his stomach, like it already knew they were about to be dragged straight to hell. Realistically, Tsukishima knew he was done for. He stood frozen, weaponless, with nothing but a messenger bag of medical texts by his side. He hated himself, and he cursed his carelessness, his unfair fate.

Except, Kuroo didn't approach him. The raven, gore soaked and grinning, just winked at him, and their eyes searched each other's for five never-ending beats of Tsukishima's heart. Weirdly enough, Tsukishima's shoulders relaxed, and he watched Kuroo run off after the spell broke between them. Tsukishima hadn't known what to do. He should've probably ran for the hills, gotten to higher ground, stolen a carriage, anything.

He'd gotten lucky.

But his brain and his heart didn't listen, and soon his feet were walking on their own accord towards the red shoreline.

And then something else unexpected happened. For the first time in all his years, Kuroo managed to surprise Tsukishima in his looting practices. Kuroo evacuated the fucking town. As in, he didn't kill or threaten any of the civilians, and Tsukishima was again left speechless.

Who was this man?

Tsukishima wasn't sure he wanted to know. But maybe he should've thought about that before he was running across the sand, right for Kuroo's ship.

--

And those were the dumb decisions which led him to stow away below decks, as well as the decisions which led to having a knife pressed against his throat.

Awesome.

Tsukishima winced as the cold steel broke skin, but it didn't stop him from snarling at his captor defiantly. He refused to give an explanation, his only regret was getting caught, and he was not going to beg for his life.

"Last chance, scum. Who are you?" One of Kuroo's subordinates screamed in his face, the knife digging deeper. Had Tsukishima had more energy, he would've complained about the troublesome volume. Tsukishima grimaced, surging up with the last of his strength to headbutt the other. It wasn't that effective, given Tsukishima's three days without food, but it stung enough.

The pirate stumbled back, clutching his head and dropping the knife on the floor.

Fuck, it's too far to grab.

Then he might've had a damn chance...

Pretty optimistic, for him, but his rational thinking was weaker as well due to his lack of strength. He overlooked the various bows, swords, and guns pointed at him.

Hopeless.

The pirate fumbled for the knife again, his forehead shining red from Tsukishima's assault. "Why you little--"

"Yamamoto, quit it. That was your fault for getting so close. You have a thick skull, you'll live," another associate said, and Tsukishima squinted at his short stature and childlike face. If it wasn't for the way all the other crew members turned to him as soon as he spoke, Tsukishima would wonder what he was doing on the ship. False judgements like that would get him killed if he wasn't careful.

"Well excuse me for trying to get information," Yamamoto mumbled, pocketing his knife.

"Does it matter? Kuroo will just kill him anyways." The voice was so sudden and soft that it almost spooked Tsukishima for the first time while being on the ship. And that said a lot, given how he'd been woken up by rough hands grabbing him and dragging him to the deck of the ship. The speaker stood near the railing, looking disinterestedly at a map of the next coast. His eyes only met Tsukishima's once, but it was enough for the blond to feel like he'd been thoroughly scanned.

Afterwards, a plethora of voice began to jumble together, debating on the outcome of Tsukishima's life as well as wondering about his 'short sighted' thinking.

"He probably didn't realize whose ship he was on."

"I wonder how Kuroo will do it..."

"Why waste energy? The guy already looks like skin and bones..."

"He better not have eaten any of our stores...Kuroo will have his head for that."

"Maybe we should just toss him now, who needs Kuroo? We all know the stowaway policy."

Tsukishima growled, tugging on his ropes. He'd rather jump overboard than listen to this.

But too many eyes were still on him. And he knew himself well enough that he wouldn't give up upon hitting water. Then what would he do?

He wasn't given much time to think about it.

"Enough."

The voice, stern and strong, froze Tsukishima to the spot. He might've imagined it, but the sea felt like it had calmed too, the characteristic ripples of waves and flocks of gulls dispersing into nothing. The ocean respected its master, that was the sole explanation Tsukishima could find.

Kuroo moved forward onto the deck, his steps loud and deliberate. No stumbling, no weakness. His black boots stood out against the harsh red of his attire, though he wasn't soaked in blood this time around. Those eyes were just as piercing though, not leaving Tsukishima's for a second. Tsukishima was the prey, and Kuroo would not let him escape. It became clear right away.

What was confusing was the fact that Tsukishima didn't appear to mind. His shoulders relaxed, and his heart rate didn't speed up. No sweat, no labored breathing, nothing to indicate fear.

Well, alright then.

Kuroo's heavy steps stopped a few feet away, and Tsukishima tilted his head, waiting.

Kuroo didn't radiate anger, but his expression was grave, skeptical. Whatever he asked, Tsukishima knew he wouldn't be able to lie. People who could discern lies from truth were rare to come by, but Tsukishima knew how to pick them out, because he was one. So was Kuroo.

"What is your name, and who sent you?" The captain eventually said, and Tsukishima sighed into the silence between them.

"Tsukishima Kei," he began, smiling at Yamamoto's indignant huff at Tsukishima's new willingness to speak. "And no one sent me. There's no ulterior motive either by the way...I'm not here to avenge dead family or anything."

"He's lying!" Yamamoto roared from the side, much to Tsukishima's aggravation. Kuroo didn't look away from him.

"You expect us to believe that you just happened to wander onto Kuroo Tetsurou's ship?" Another subordinate said. "The crest and sails are unmistakable."

"Fukunaga, I can handle this," Kuroo interrupted, and his crew automatically backed off.

Tsukishima wasn't deterred. "No, I knew whose ship it was, I just didn't care. I needed passage."

Which also wasn't completely true. Tsukishima still wasn't sure what had compelled him to board the damn vessel. He could've found another way. These days, Tsukishima was an experienced wanderer. He had no home, no commitments, and he could find work anywhere. But he'd rushed onboard despite that, when he could've waited for another less dangerous cargo ship to sneak onto.

Unfortunately, Kuroo picked up on that. His lips lifted into a smirk, sending shivers through Tsukishima's body. "Passage to where? You couldn't have known where we were headed."

Tsukishima huffed, glaring. "Anywhere."

The lack of an excuse notably startled Kuroo, someone most likely used to seeing people sweat and fumble as they tried to save their own skin. Tsukishima might've had a need for self preservation, but he was no slug, and he refused to squirm and cower.

Certainly not when he heard the quick unsheathing of a sword, and most definitely not when said sword ended up pressed against his neck.

So theatrical...

The sword was more magnificent up close. He'd been right before, the metal was sturdy and stunning, shining in the sunlight and freshly sharpened.

The hilt was silver and encrusted with red jewels, obviously plundered from a wealthy province. Tsukishima eyes gleamed, and his hand itched to wield it.

"Right," Kuroo said, calling Tsukishima's attention back to his suspicious eyes. "No matter. Keep your lies and whatever you’re hiding, they're of no use. We can't take the chance of keeping you around. This is the price you pay for trespassing."

Tsukishima bowed his head as the sword pulled back, ready to deliver the final blow. For whatever reason, the panic bubbled up and then dissipated in an instant, like his body was trying to distance itself from the inevitable. That, or Tsukishima didn't have much of a "life" for it to flash before his eyes. At least he wouldn't have to be depressed about that much longer.

Kuroo stepped forward, taking position, and Tsukishima nearly glanced up, wishing to look at him one last time. But he refused, because no one got to see or know his last emotion, not even someone as regal as Kuroo Tetsurou.

"Any last wor-ergh--"

Tsukishima's head shot up like a bullet at the guttural sound, all thoughts of death put on hold.

What...

Kuroo burped again, his form trembling for the first time. Vulnerable. Sick. Tsukishima's eyes sparked with recognition. He couldn't help it, he was a doctor at heart.

No way. This is either the best thing or the worst thing I've ever seen.

Kuroo's face twisted, turning a few varying shades of green before ultimately paling. The captain stumbled as the ship rocked, clutching his stomach. His eyes snapped shut, and his breathing grew labored. Like that'll help.

Tsukishima could practically see the signs as they happened. Clammy skin, maybe a light sweat, churning stomach...

Seasickness obviously doesn't care if you're a famous pirate king.

And Tsukishima couldn't help it, he laughed, fucking laughed at the most dangerous man he'd ever met. Flat out lost it, though he'd been seconds from death. This is amazing.

Kuroo's head shot up, his glare lacking the needed intensity. It was more like a measly squint, and the overall effect was dulled by the fact that Kuroo looked two seconds from barfing on everyone and everything. "How dare you. I'm--oh god...everything is spinning..."

Tsukishima laughed again, but for once, it wasn't cruel. He hated admitting it but it was....sort of endearing. Kuroo brandished a sharp sword and radiated authority, but here he was, hunched over in front of his whole crew. What was better was that the crew didn't look the least bit surprised, just somewhat fed up.

Ah, so this happens a lot...

"You should sit down," Tsukishima said, trying to move forward. He instinctively moved towards Kuroo, as if to help him, which was an...odd feeling when said person wanted to kill you.

"I'm fine," Kuroo said, but the syllables were cut up by unattractive burps. "Oh man..."

"He really is," Yaku chimed in with a sigh. "This has been happening a lot this week..."

"Don't tell him that."

Ignoring Kuroo's complaints, Tsukishima's mind raced. Frequent nausea on relatively calm seas could mean the captain had a bug of some sort...

"Have you been eating?" Tsukishima asked. "You could be more sick than you realize. Is your appetite normal? Are your bowel movements--"

"Too far, too far," Kuroo pleaded, much to Tsukishima's annoyance. The sternness from earlier was gone, replaced with childish whines.

"Are you seriously getting weird about this? You gutted a man like...3 days ago," Tsukishima argued. It had looked really freaking cool too, but he left that out.

"That's different," Kuroo forced out, gagging shortly afterwards. "Ugh, someone cut out my stomach..."

"Untie me first," Tsukishima deadpanned.

"Okay okay, can we stop this? An execution shouldn't take up the whole morning," Yaku intervened, but even his eyes flashed with worry when Kuroo crouched to the floor. "But...maybe a postponement is in order..."

Yamamoto and the rest of the crew gaped, but well....it was Kuroo's job to carry through with the executions, and he wouldn't be doing that anytime soon.

"You really should get midship," Tsukishima advised. "It'll be more stable there. He also needs fresh water, and some bread."

And then, Tsukishima's voice seemed to have a mind of his own, because before he knew it he said: "I can take care of him. I'm a doctor."

Sort of. Pretty much.

He left out the whole 'got kicked out' bit.

"No way! That's too far," Fukunaga argued, looking to the rest of his shipmates. "He could be an assassin! Or...some spy. We can't just--"

Kuroo wretched again, and the sound made Tsukishima shrink away. "Fine. So I'm guessing you guys know how to help him then? Know all the potential remedies and what medicines to get from the next port? Right?"

Tsukishima didn't care if he was being insolent, he didn't have time for idiots.

The crew looked between each other, concerned, and Kuroo looked up at Tsukishima again. He was clearly faint...and would only get worse. Actually, he'd probably been like this everyday if what his crew said was accurate. No one had noticed though, no one had questioned it.

"Yaku, if we keep him monitored, it won't be an issue," the quieter pirate from before said, rolling up his map as he stepped into the middle of the group. The next port is a small one, we can get Kuroo what he needs without getting into that big of a fight."

Right. Because they likely wouldn't be able to bring Kuroo with them if he got sicker. However, the prospect of escape hardly crossed Tsukishima's mind.

Whatever was wrong with him, he didn't know.

After a few more tense moments, Yaku sighed in frustration, and Tsukishima knew he'd won. "Kenma is right. Someone untie the prisoner and escort him to Kuroo's room. Do not let him out of your sight."

The look of warning he got from Yaku was more intimidating than the near brush with death had been, but as Tsukishima rubbed at his rope burns and watched the crew lead Kuroo to his room, the blond felt immense relief.

--

Tsukishima rung out the wet rag, listening to the water trickle into the bucket on the floor. He tried not to be too intimidated by Kuroo's stare, and briefly wondered why the other hadn't passed out yet. He should've, given how shitty he looked and how hot his forehead was, but suspicion was a powerful thing. The captain hadn't taken his eyes off Tsukishima the whole time he'd been treated, and every few minutes Yaku or Yamamoto came to check on them.

Though, after the thirty minute mark, they'd all seemed to calm down. Tsukishima had done nothing but give top notch treatment, and pleasantly too. The crew had allowed him to eat first, and with his stomach filled, Tsukishima could devout all his energy to nursing Kuroo.

He folded the towel, moving to place it over Kuroo's head, and brushed the raven's sweaty bangs away. "It's not much but...this ship is poorly equipped to take care of these things. At least your crew is good at what they do, or I would seriously wonder how you were all alive."

And he meant that. There were hardly any tools or medical instruments here. The chance of effectively treating knife or gunshot wounds? Slim.

"Never needed a medic before," Kuroo grumbled, voice rough as sand. Wordlessly, Tsukishima handed him another saltine cracker, and water.

"Eat it slowly," Tsukishima advised, before getting up to adjust the curtain on the porthole. The empty sea....unsettled him. "And that's very arrogant of you."

Kuroo just laughed, sipping at the water with a grimace. "Maybe so."

"You'll need to take it easy for a few days, definitely no going off ship for anything other than stretching your legs. The fresh air will help," Tsukishima said again, taking a seat on the stool by Kuroo's bed.

Without much else to do, he curled in on himself, knowing Yaku would probably have him stay in the ship's brig when he returned to take Tsukishima away. Guess he deserved that, medical skill or not. He remained a trespasser.

But again, Kuroo never failed to surprise him.

"My crew can handle the expedition," Kuroo said, turning onto his side to stare at Tsukishima more directly. The towel slipped slightly from his head, the water droplets rolling down his face, and Tsukishima adjusted it carefully. "I'm sorry for the rough treatment out there by the way."

Tsukishima startled, mouth falling open slightly. A scolding or complaint, he might've expected. But an apology? From Kuroo Tetsurou? Tsukishima was most likely dreaming at this point, or he truly had been killed.

He swallowed, stunned, and nearly told Kuroo it was fine.

Fine.

It certainly was not. He'd almost been killed! Yet here he was, baffled by this endearing, murderous bastard's genuine apology. Before he could respond, Kuroo continued, confusing Tsukishima further.

Pirate kings were not supposed to be this reasonable.

"We used to take in stowaways, make them part of the crew. It was usually fine, but...one of them nearly killed Kenma, and tried to steal from me," Kuroo explained, and he had Tsukishima's full attention. "So...there went that tradition. But don't worry. Now that we know you're not a threat I can probably convince the guys to spare you."

"How do you know I'm not a threat?" Tsukishima said suddenly, out of habit. He was used to being underestimated, but maybe this wasn't the best time to get confrontational. He'd just been pardoned dammit. But Kuroo froze, his expression too comical for the blond to keep a straight face. With no anger present from Kuroo, Tsukishima laughed, and a moment later, so did Kuroo.

"I'm dangerous in my own right, but not to you," Tsukishima assured. The way Kuroo nodded, believing him, made Tsukishima fight back a smile. And once more, Kuroo picked up on the things running through Tsukishima's mind, like a sixth sense.

"Why is that?" Kuroo asked. "I'm not exactly the gentlest guy out there."

I know. And well, there was no use lying to him. Tsukishima shook his head, huffing to himself.

"I don't know," he whispered, glancing away to pick at the few vials sitting about. He'd have to fill them up when they docked...

The confession felt too intimate to say right to Kuroo's face, and Tsukishima began to make a list in his head to distract himself as he spoke. "I don't know why I'm on your ship either. I was led here, that's all I know."

He heard Kuroo shift in bed, his tone curious and far too childlike for his occupation. "Led?"

"Yes...like I couldn't help it," Tsukishima said, knowing how ridiculous it sounded. He was no pirate. He didn't particularly like the sea. He didn't particularly like anything, but...

But he knew when to trust his gut. It had yet to let him down in this cruel life of his, regardless of where it took him. Like a murderous pirate king's ship...

He scolded his phrasing internally, sure it would be seen as a lie, but Kuroo was far more competent than that.

"Oh, well then I get it," Kuroo said, like it was the simplest thing in the world. Tsukishima looked back at him, perplexed, and felt his hands freeze up at the captain's small smile. Kuroo coughed a second later, and his eyes drooped, like he was going to let himself succumb to sleep now after all this time. Now that Tsukishima was trustworthy. Somehow, the realization made Tsukishima more relaxed than he had been in a long time. "That's how the sea was for me. I still don't really get it, but I had to listen. So here I am."

"Here you are," Tsukishima echoed dumbly, not knowing where to go from there. All he knew was that physically, he'd be content staying right in that spot, and it scared him.

"Nuh-uh Tsukki," Kuroo grumbled, the drowsiness taking over. Tsukishima caught the towel as it slipped from Kuroo's head, watching as those golden eyes fluttered closed. He flinched a bit at the nickname, but...that could be ironed out later. "Here we are."

Tsukishima's breathing stalled for a moment, and he felt stuck in time, watching Kuroo slip into a deep sleep with the ease of a young child, comfortable in Tsukishima's presence. The blond clutched the towel tightly, feeling the water run over his knuckles as he digested the words. He hadn't had anyone refer to him as part of something in many years, and it was nearly too much.

He shouldn't have cared so much. He refused to. And yet...

He pushed the blankets over Kuroo's shivering form, rewetting the cloth in order to make sure Kuroo was fully set for the night. The whole time, he couldn't shake Kuroo's declaration.

Idiot...who says things like that?

He was sure that wasn't the worst of it either, and there would be much more to come.

Maybe that was alright though.

Tsukishima would stay here for as long as he was allowed, or for as long as his soul willed him to. It was annoying, irrational, but he also knew it was right.

Not that he had any chance of fighting it anyways.

Tsukishima stood up as he heard Yaku's steps coming to collect him, content with spending a night in the brig while Kuroo rested. A fair punishment, in the grand scheme of things.

He'd have lots of time to prove himself he hoped, and the desire to made him squint at his reflection in Kuroo's broken side mirror.

So this is who we are now...

So be it.

Tsukishima never imagined in a million years he'd be a pirate, but he couldn't find a single regret about it in his head, not when it was on Kuroo's crew.

And well, that was a start.

[alloftimeandspacetosee]

In Travelling Terms

 So I have just skipped over a piece of writing bc it needs more editing than I have patience for at the moment, but the basics is; Jay and Jayden continued travelling together as far as Kalos, at which point they were gonna split again

 but uh. Language barriers.

 Also Jay has a slightly... obsessive streak in approaching the gyms. She’s using them as a coping mechanism for Wild Shit going down in the main plot.

 It’s not healthy.

[1] [2] [3] [4] [6] [7] [8]

~

I leave the harbourmaster’s office and glance down at Vulp. “Well.” That had been tricky.

Vulp washes her ear and yawns.

“I need...” to learn a new language real fast. I glance about at all the signs; Kalosian first, then Galarii, then Kanjin. And it would probably drop the two I knew once we got further into the region, away from the tourist points. “Maybe a translator. D’you think we can hire one like a tour guide...?”

Vulp stretches and pads out in front of me.

“Sure.” I follow her. Would’ve been clever to have realised this before I left, but forethought ain’t my forte. Neither are languages, really. “Maybe...”

If I knew someone here, that would be – Jayden. Jayden has been here before, he said so. Did he mention knowing the language...?

“Hey, Vulp. Find Jayden.” He can’t have got far.

Vulp sets to it and darts out into the crowds.

I race after her, slipping around people as best I could, thankful I hadn’t brought everything with me to sign my ship in.

Jayden hasn’t got far. I find him in the market, looking at food for travelling.

“Hey!” I stop beside him, slightly out of breath, and pull my bag up higher. “I’ve - hit a snag.”

He pays for the small bag of berries and offers me one. “And you think I can help?”

“Well...” I shrug. “Neither Brith or I can speak Kalosian, and I don’t feel like relying on apps and broken Kanjin to... do this. For translation.”

Jayden quirks a half-smile. “And you’re hoping I can?”

“You did mention it. We got Galarii in Snowpoint. Or – you know, from my grandparents. So that I can do, but Kalosian... not so much.”

“Maybe you should have gone north first.”

“Eh.” I shrug. “Been there with the family before, visiting the homeland. Never got the chance for Kalos. But... can you help?”

He pockets his wallet and slips the berries into his bag. “And travel with you some more?”

“Yeah, I know, you probably want to do your own thing, it’s been a hell of a long time stuck together-” I wrinkle my nose, half-turning away. “We can get by on the universal language of hand-waving.”

Jayden laughs and comes to my side, walking us back towards the harbour. “It’s fine. Of course I’ll travel with you.”

“Really? That would be amazing.”

“Sure.” He grins. “Consider it payment for the ride.”

“Unnecessary. You gave me folklore.” I snort.

“I can’t pay for all my rides in folklore.”

“Eh.” I shrug. “It works for me. I can cover meals while we’re here-”

“We’re taking that in turns,” Jayden says, interrupting me for the first time I can remember.

“Well I never.” I clasp a hand to my chest. “You can be rude!”

“All in the name of fair play,” he replies. “Now, you need to pick up your things...? Where are we heading first?”

“Yeah, need to get my stuff together. And... the rest of the pack.” I glance down at Vulp. “I did not get far.”

Jayden laughs. “Alright. And then?”

“Lumiose.” I glance sideways at him. “I’m planning on challenging the league, so I need to register. If that’s alright? It gives us a structure to travel by, and I get different fighting styles and you should get more flying types, so... that follows...?”

“That sounds good.” Jayden smiles. “You don’t have to worry about catering to my interests, you know.”

“I mean – why else would you be here? New flying types? All in the name of research for Skyla’s gym?” I turn sideways away from him, sliding between two people waiting in line for something. “Or is this just like a holiday on the cheap for you, so you can skive off work?”

“You got me.” Jayden laughs. “Just one request, when all’s said and done.”

“Name it.” I turn on my heel to face him, still walking backwards.

“I’m not your opponent for battling when you need training.”

“Hey, watch it!” The gruff voice snaps in Kanjin.

I duck as Jayden grabs me, pulling me out of the way of dock workers carrying heavy equipment. “Shit! Thanks.”

Jayden lets me go as soon as they’re past and I’m steady on my own feet again. “Also, watch where you’re going.”

“Fine, no battling. Eyes on the road.” I flash him a smile over my shoulder. “It’s cool, you know? You don’t battle. I know that.”

“Thank you.”

“Besides, I don’t wanna know how I stack up against my friends. That just gets awkward.”

“Haven’t you beaten Candice...?”

“Yeah, but that was her gym team. Not her actual team.” I wave my hand. “Official business. World of difference.”

“I see.”

“You know, I don’t think you do.” I narrow my eyes at him, but only for a second before I grin. “But that’s cool. You’re here for birds and translation purposes only.”

“You got me. Those are my travelling terms.” Jayden dips his head as we reach my ship.

“Score. Shouldn’t be long.”

Brith’s waiting on deck with my pack, standing against the railing. “He’s back?” She follows me into the cabin.

“I need a translator,” I reply. “Because neither of us know Kalosian and apptranslate can only go so far.”

“And human company is good for you.”

“Pshhhh.” I flap a hand at her, thumping my travelling rucksack onto my back. “Ow. It’s not all that different having you around, you know.”

“Travelling with humans is different from travelling with pokemon.” She folds her arms, leaning against the open door.

“Sure.”

Sesser flits onto my shoulder.

“Everyone in!” As the pack crowds at the door, I return them to their pokeballs and tuck them into the bag that I then tie at my waist.

Soise, Brith, Vulp and Sesser are the only ones I leave out, although Gar’aq and Lapwing are sprawled over the bows of the ship.

“You two!”

They look up as I yell.

“Don’t do anything dumb and reckless – yes, Gar’aq, that is aimed at you. Nothing unless there is harm threatened to the ship and that upon it, clear?”

He croaks out an affirmative call.

“Keep an eye on him.” I point at Lapwing.

She nods and growls something low at Gar’aq.

Brith snorts as she follows me from the ship to join Jayden on the docks, who already has Soise and Vulp underfoot.

“Ok, shall we?” I tilt my head towards the harbour, the town beyond.

“Onto another league,” Brith murmurs. “How long will this one take you?”

“Depends how often we stop to look at feathers.” I shrug, and set off. “Which you may ask us to do as often as you like,” I say to Jayden.

“Please do,” Brith says. “She needs to remember to breathe.”

“I know how to breathe.” I scoff at her, smiling. “Besides, I haven’t been here before. We’ll do tourist things! I’ll stop and smell the roses or whatever. It’ll be fun.”

“I’m sure it will.” Jayden smiles. “Let’s go get ‘em.”

[wingsofanillyrian]

Grief (Feysand + son)

Anonymous asked: “A fic where Feyre is dead (more like the funeral time not her actual death) and they have a let’s say 19 or something year old boy. So basically a man which means he did get to know his mother. Rhysand and his son stay after everyone leaves the graveyard (or somewhere else) and they have a heart to heart. Nothing cheesy just sharing stories about Feyre or something.”

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I was so tired of shaking hands and accepting everyone’s condolences. I’d kept a brave face on during the wake and the burial, but now that I was alone, everything came pouring out.

I cried for the loss of my mother, whom I’d only known 19 short years. I mourned the loss of what could have been; the battles and victories we wouldn’t get to share.

I knelt in the dirt once everyone had left. It had rained this morning, which was fitting, I supposed. Moisture seeped into the dress pants I wore, soaking my knees and chilling my very bones.

“Oryn.”

My father’s voice rang through the crisp fall air, disturbing the silence. Leaves crunched beneath his black leather shoes as he moved to stand at my side.

“I’m sorry about the suit,” I mumbled, knowing it was likely ruined by the fresh mud. I brushed the heels of my hands over my reddened eyes and sniffled.

“Don’t worry about it.” He knelt beside me, placing his hand on the intricately carved gravestone. “I miss her too, you know. But your mother… She wouldn’t want us to be sad.”

“She’d want us to tell stories about all her epic adventures,” I finished for him. Despite myself, small smile tugged on the corners of my lips, because it was true. The last thing she would have wanted would be for us to mope around.

I pushed a hand through my honey-colored locks and let out a breezy laugh. “Remember last year when the three of us wreaked havoc on the Summer Court?”

Rhysand barked out a bellowing laugh. “Oh, Gods, I’ll never forget the look on Tarquin’s face when he saw us out drinking with Varian that night. I don’t think I’ve ever seen another Fae so drunk before! I wonder if Tarquin has forgiven his cousin for breaking that precious vase yet.”

“Probably not,” I grinned, recalling the drunken stumble that had caused the centuries-old antique to crash to the floor.

Rhysand shook his head and smiled. “Tarquin was so close to banishing the three of us.”

“But then mom saved the day by concocting that vile, gross green tonic to cure Varian’s hangover the next day.” Varian had woken up ready to fight someone, but as always, mom had been able to salvage the situation. That was one of the many things she was good at.

“Yes, that woman saved us all.” He sighed, running his fingers over the letters engraved in the stone.

“Before you were born, your mother and I used to get into a lot of trouble.”

“Oh, really?” I quirked a brow. “Do tell.”

“You know that she always had a thirst for adventure,” he murmured, and I nodded.

“There was one night, about thirty years ago, that it snowed four feet in the space of a few hours. Fluffy, white powder up to our chests when we opened the door. It was cold as all hell too, but Feyre-” his voice caught, and I looked up to find silver lining his eyes.

This wasn’t easy for either of us. Tears blurred my vision, but I wrapped an arm around my father’s shoulders. We had each other, and though no one would ever fill the holes left in our hearts, we would support each other.

He drew a ragged breath and collected himself as best he could. “She decided to have some fun.”

“Oh boy,” I said, smiling despite my sadness. Mom was always thriving on adrenaline, and had often encouraged me to do dumb, harmless little stunts. I could only imagine where this story was headed, if mom had spearheaded the endeavor.

“Yeah.” He smiled the slightest bit. “After pouring Cassian and I each a shot of the strongest liquor she could find, she decided to convince us males it was an excellent idea to jump off a balcony.”

I couldn’t help it; I burst out laughing. “Really? And you guys fell for it, obviously?”

“You know how persuasive she can-” he winced and corrected himself, “could be. ‘Don’t be babies,’ she told us, 'I’d do it, and I don’t even have wings to catch me!’ Of course, Cass and I were still skeptical at the softness of the fresh snow, even with the alcohol in out veins.”

“Oh, but your mother really knew how to push Cassian’s buttons. She poked and prodded at his pride until he eventually agreed.”

“The three of us moved to the second story balcony, where the midnight wind whipped at us. Cass teetered as he climbed up on the rail and stripped off his shirt.” He glanced at me then, and seeing my smirk, he added: “Your uncle takes every chance he can get to show off.”

“Anyway, Cassian was standing on the rail, spewing nonsense about how it wouldn’t hurt him at all. But he wouldn’t jump, despite all his rantings about how he was a 'brave Illyrian’ and all that.”

His violet eyes sparkled with a mixture of pride and longing as he turned to me. “Would you care to guess what your mother did?”

I grinned. “She pushed him, didn’t she?” Rhys nodded.

“She pushed that bastard right over,” he said with a watery smile. “He screamed the whole way down. Lucky that he tucked his wings in tight though, and he basically cannonballed right into one of the drifts.”

“I fully expected him to crawl out of the snow with at *least* one broken bone. But no, he shot up, flew back up to where your mother and I stood, flabbergasted by his energy. The three of us spent the rest of the night jumping into the drifts, leaving huge Fae-sized holes in the snowy lawn.”

“That actually sounds kinda fun,” I said, closing my eyes to picture it. 

“Oh, it was a great time.” He smiled wistfully as another tear slid down his cheek. “It became a sort of tradition, until you came along.”

“I think… I think this winter we should start it up again.” Because mom would want us to. She would want us to enjoy life; seize the day.

“That-” he clapped a hand on my shoulder- “sounds like a wonderful idea.”

Thunder rumbled in the distance, and we both glanced to the sky. Lightning flashed in the dark clouds and it started to drizzle.

Even the sky was mourning mom’s death, it seemed.

I leaned forward to press a kiss to the three-mountain sigil at the top of the stone. “I love you, mom.”

“C'mon, let’s go home.” Dad smiled sadly and squeezed my shoulder as we rose to our feet. “She loved you too, son. More than anything.”

“I know.”

It would take a long time to heal from this staggering loss. But I wouldn’t be alone. I had my family, and they had me. We would lean on each other, and it would be hard to fill the gaps left by mom’s death, but we would all work through it together.

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