#I know I'll PROBABLY pass but it's still stressing me thinking of all the things that will make my grade lower and how important this is
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dragoninahumancostume · 9 months ago
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I hate having to study because it's really hard. Like I don't know how to accommodate myself to achieve that, my memory just doesn't retain information for long enough to get to my tests most of the time. And I don't have a long enough attention span to have a good study session. And I can't ask for help because I have no one to go to besides my best friend who questions me about the subject when I need it, and that's a good method but sometimes the things just don't stay or don't connect or something. that's the only way I've ever studied so it's the only comfortable one, but I can't seem to be able to do things right. Like sure I got a high average grade last year but there were too many low ones, like straight up RED grades, and my final grade wasn't as high as it could have been.
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fizzy-blood · 7 months ago
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["Are you lost?"]
Ticci Toby🪓 x GN!Reader (Smut)
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Not a request but I'm bored and wanna write something... Idk man. This is definitely going to be way longer than my headcanons because this is an actual story so yk.
18+ Warning
This content includes: Choking ig, Slight degrading, Hatchet fucking (if ykyk), It's one of those "I'll let you fuck me if you let me go after" type things, Dom Toby, Blood kink, kinda public? (Like, you're in the middle of the woods but...), Reader is way to horny lmao, Reader also has a pussy because it's easier to write for me (no gender mentioned tho).
It was a cold, late night. You had been walking through the woods for hours, completely lost. Maybe if you didn't decide that it would be a good idea to go off the path to find cool trinkets and animal bones you wouldn't be walking through the woods feeling like something was watching you. It wasn't all bad though, you did eventually find a lake in a clearing, you could finally see the moon again. The lake was peaceful and still, a small breeze passed by as you stepped out into the moonlight. You sat down on a rock next to the water, still unable to shake the feeling of someone's eyes on you. Little did you know that you weren't being watched by an animal, in fact the person was hiding in a tree nearby. He watched you as you sat down on the rock, staying as still and silent as he could.
He had picked you as his next target, you looked so small from up there in the trees, he couldn't just let you walk out of the woods unharmed. He slowly climbed down from the tree he was in to get a closer look at you. He began to walk towards you as you closed your eyes and sighed loudly, it was clear that you were stressed about being lost. You didn't hear him approach as you were to in your head thinking to hear him.
Finally he was right behind you, he tapped you on the shoulder to let you know he was there. You quickly whipped your head around and scrambled away from him, almost falling in the water as you did so. You looked up to see a scrawny looking man holding what looked to be a hatchet standing over you, he had a mask and goggles covering his face and a hood over his head. His head twitched and your eyes widened as he took a step closer to you, kneeling down and wrapping a hand around your throat. He tightened his hands around you only to immediately let go after the word "H-harder-" slipped out your mouth.
"W-what the ff-fuck?" He said, staring at you with a concerned look on his face, you couldn't see it though since his mask was in the way. "W-what the fuck is wrong with y-you?", you paused for a moment, he took a step back when you didn't respond. "I guess it doesn't matter n-now does it? You-you are going to d-die anyways.." he said with a sadistic look on his face. You looked up at him with a strange look, you were clearly embarrassed from what just happened and didn't really know what to do about the situation you were in. "Wait wait wait! Can't we figure something out?" You stammered. "Like-like what?" He said softly, his voice sent a chill down your spine causing you to blush slightly. This put a very... Interesting image in your head. "Uhhh- you could uhmm..." You sighed, knowing that you were probably going to regret suggesting this "I'll... I'll let you.. fuck me?" You said nervously, your face clearly a bright red. His eyes widened as you said that, clearly intrigued by the idea. "Hmm, You sure you want that? You don't even know my name and you wanna fuck me?" He slowly pulled his hood down and his goggles off, he had hazel eyes and dark brown hair. "If I do will you let me go?" You asked, clearly terrified of him rejecting the offer and killing you.
"Fine, on one condition-"he said, placing his free hand under your chin and tilting your head up,"-you can't tell anyone about this..", you agreed, face still red from asking. He smirked at you and removed his mask, you immediately took note of the large gash on his cheek. "My n-name is Toby, by the way.. feel free to ss-ay it as much as you'd like while we do this~". You basicly died when he said that, reality was going to hit you like a ton of bricks after this but you didn't care.
He got back down to your level as you were still sitting down on the rock, he crawled towards you and lent you a hand, gesturing for you to take it. Once he had ahold of your hand he pulled you in closer to him, he put his hatchet down beside him and held you in his arms. He let out a small laugh as you looked at him, you seemed tense, unsure about how to feel about the whole situation. Toby knew this, so in an attempt to make this a bit easier on you a bit less tense he kissed you. No hesitation whatsoever, he just kissed you. You closed your eyes and leaned in, you wanted this. The idea of the man you were kissing being a literal murderer was reaching out to the most depraved parts of your mind.
He started to become more needy as the kiss continued, he pulled you in tighter, feeling you up through your clothes. He pulled away and started to pull your shirt off. You didn't struggle, Infact, you helped him. Toby seemed confused by your sudden change in mood but he didn't complain. He pushed you onto your back and kissed your neck, causing you to moan at the feeling. "S-so nice, such pretty s-ounds~" he whispered into your ear, "w-whats your name.. I f-for-got to ask y-you...". You looked up at him and said your name, "Such a nice name~" he muttered as he nuzzled into your neck. He began to kiss your neck, nipping at the skin trying to find your more sensitive spots. Finally you let out a small whimper letting him know that he had found it. He began to bite and suck at the skin, listening to every little sound you made.
[Small Time Skip]
You two had been like this for a couple minutes now when you felt something tug at your belt, Toby had started to undo it. He finally let go of your neck so he could take off your pants. You looked down as he finally got them off, you gasped loudly as he began to rub your clit through your panties. "H-holy shit, how are you th-this wet already? Y-you fucking slut, you wanted th-is to-to happen didn't you.." he smirked at you as you squirmed under him. He moved his hand away making you whine at the lack of friction "Answer me o-or I'll st-stop!" He shouted. You quickly nodded, "Yes, I'm a slut, I wanted this to happen~ please- just keep going~". This answer obviously pleased him one way or another because he began to pull down your panties and suck at your clit. "Fuck- T-toby~" you moaned loudly as pulled your thighs up onto his shoulders and started to eat you out. You continued to moan and whimper as he did, placing your hand on the back of his head to pull him in closer.
Your body was so warm compared to his despite your lack of clothes. He could feel your thighs squeeze his head as you inches closer and closer to your orgasms, you were so close that you had started to shake. Just as you were about to cum he took his mouth off of your pussy, leaving you uncomfortable as the cold air touched it. "Why'd you stop..." You whined at him, "I wanted to see your pretty face~" he seemed to like the anger and pain in your eyes. "Don't worry, you'll feel full again soon.." He sighed, picking up his hatchet from the ground. "Calm down sweetheart, I'm not gonna kill you.. I have a better idea~" the sadistic look in his eyes set you off a bit. You watched him move over to the water behind you and dip the handle of the hatchet in the lake, slowly taking it out and wiping the water off with his sweater. "Hold this." He demanded, holding his hatchet out to you, you held it in your hands as you watched him pull his now damp sweater off of his body.
He took the hatchet back, "You ok there? You seem nervous again..". A stupid question really, of course you were nervous, he looked like he was about to kill you. You nodded your head, "Yeah... I'm fine..". Toby crawled on top of you again and lined up his hatchet with your hole, that's when you realized what he was doing, "I really don't need you getting pregnant on me.. after all, I did say not to talk about this with anyone.." he smiled at you.
You arched your back as he began to slide it in, trying your hardest not to moan. You could feel every little detail of the wooden handle as it entered your body, he slowly began to pull the handle out of you and back in again. "That hurts-" he ignored your crys and continued, taking off his belt and pulling his own pants down. You watched him touch himself as you continued to cry and whine from the pain, he seemed to be getting off to it. Soon enough the pain turned into pleasure as your body got used to the hard wooden handle inside of you. He began to rub himself against your clit, you could tell he was hard, it was starting to affect him too much. He continued to rub his dick against you as you whimpered from the feeling, the handle was too hard, too big, and he really wasn't helping with the overstimulation by rubbing against you. Toby placed his free hand on the back of your head again, watching small tears run down the sides of your face from the overwhelming feeling of the hatchet. He began to kiss you again, it was much slower, much softer than the first time. You gave into the feeling and wrapped your arms around him, pulling him in closer.
You both continued for as long as you both could handle it. You had placed a hand on his hardened dick and had been jerking him off for a couple of minutes. Finally he came on top of you, he moved his body up a bit out of your reach to watch it slowly drip off of you. Toby had finished, but you were still chasing your orgasm, he could see the pain in your eyes so he decided to do something to ease the pain. You groaned as he pulled the hatchet out, it had a small amount of blood on it now from how hard it was and how much it was stretching you out. You watched as Toby licked the blood off of the handle, his face had a noticeable blush on it, clearly he had been enjoying himself... He was also enjoying the blood a bit to much, maybe he had some kind of a blood kink? You didn't bother to ask him as he placed the hatchet back on the ground.
"Toby? What are you doin-nghh~" You moaned softly as his tongue touched your clit again, it was a nice change from the hatchet, much more soft and warm. You could feel his tongue work through your folds as he licked and sucked at your pussy. It felt like heaven as he licked up the blood that had been slowly dripping out of you. Did it hurt? A little... Did you care? Not really.
He eventually managed to find a sweet spot that was closer to your entrance and began to attack it with his tongue, soothing the pain as best he could. He let go for a moment and placed a finger inside of you and began to move it in and out only to return to your clit so he could still taste you, so wet, so sweet. You squeezed his head in-between your thighs and finally came undone. A wave of euphoria washed over you as he continued. A couple seconds later he finally stopped, he was pleased with how the whole thing had went.
He dressed you and put his sweater back on, picking both you and his hatchet up off of the rocks, carrying you out of the woods. He placed you down next to a tree near the path and sat down next to you slowly falling asleep.
The next morning you woke up peacefully, it was a Saturday so you did have any work. You felt a small pain in your abdomen as you stretched your body, looking over to see Toby's sleeping form next to you. The memories of last night came flooding back to you as your face went red... Did you regret it? Not at all.
HOLY SHIT!! (⁠┛⁠◉⁠Д⁠◉⁠)⁠┛⁠彡⁠┻⁠━⁠┻
I almost lost this whole post over a notification about penises and I really don't know how to feel about that....
Idk, hope you enjoyed it!! -Fizz
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hyunniesgirl · 1 year ago
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Another Love | Part 2
Summary: you've been hopelessly in love with Han since you were children. One night you confess your feelings to him.
Words count: 5,302
Warnings: a bit of angst
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
>> Masterlist <<
A/N: hello!! I'm really happy about the feedback I got on the first part, I got sick and stressed because of work that's why it took me a bit long to post this part, I'll try and be faster for the next ones. Spoiler: things will get more interesting on the next part.
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Han couldn't sleep, couldn't eat or even function properly since the day you left, it was so strange not having you around. He wakes up, gets to work, the boys make him eat something, they practice, then they eat something again because they know he's going home to starve himself in his pit of misery, then he gets home, takes a shower and goes to sleep.
He's always anxious, too afraid of losing you, every time he looks at his phone he's scared that a message from you will come saying you don't want to be near him anymore, saying you are not coming back.
He really wishes he could like you back, why wouldn't he? You're pretty, smart and funny. But he just never thought about you in that way, he's not sure why. You were always just his best friend, the one person that encouraged him to do the crazy things he wanted, the one person that got his back when things didn't work out, the first one he told when he passed the audition to be a trainee.
When he saw you at the party he was happy to see you smiling with other people, he was usually the one making you laugh but it made him relieved to see you were okay even if it was not with him.
It hurt so much when you ran away from him, he was already feeling bad but that made everything worse. So he drank more and more until he wasn't feeling anything anymore.
He saw the guy you were hanging out with, he was with his friends and you were nowhere to be found and even though he knew you didn't want to talk to him he went after you.
He found you outside, seated on the floor probably getting some fresh air or waiting for Hannah.
When you saw him he wished he didn't go after you at all. Everything happened so fast that he almost didn't manage to hold you before you walked past him running away again.
Han just couldn't let you leave like that, he was that desperate. He wanted to make you stay no matter what and he hurt you once more.
Was he even a good friend at this point? How many times can you possibly hurt someone and still be called a friend? He felt like trash waking up in the morning and remembering everything.
Chan insisted on coming home with him, he was feeling too guilty and too tired to protest, so he let his friend crash on the sofa.
Since Chan was there, Jisung should have expected a full breakfast when he got to the kitchen. Eggs, bacon and toast were waiting for him, but he didn't feel like eating.
"I feel awful, do you think I should go there and apologize to her?" Han asks and Chan shakes his head.
"She needs time, that's all you can give her now"
Han sighs, his anxiety going through the ceiling. He's lost, not sure if it's possible for things to go back to the way it was.
He could tell how worried you got when you saw him at the party, he knows too well the face you make when you want to scold him for not taking care of himself. So he spent the next week trying to get back on his feet, he doesn't want you feeling bad, he wants you to think the least about him so you can get over him soon enough.
So much happened during this time you were not with him, they finished their album and were going to Japan in two weeks. He wanted to show you their music, their new concept, the outfits, you always loved to see the clothes they would wear. You probably already know all of this, since you're living with Seungmin but he wanted to be the one showing you so he could see you smile and feel your support.
>><<
The group had gone to Japan, that included Seungmin, so he asked Hannah to stay with you in his apartment while he was away. It's nice spending so much time with her, there is this boy in her communication class she is absolutely sure will match perfectly with you, even though you already told her you don't want to deceive anyone, the thing with Heeseung made you feel bad enough. You know she's insisting on it because she cares about you, but you don't want to start a new relationship already on the wrong foot.
"I'm sure he's great, but I won't be going out with other people until I feel like I'll be able to get over Jisung"
"And when is that?" She asks frustrated, "I know a lifelong crush won't go away in a month but don't you think you have to meet other people and open up?"
You sigh, you just don't want to hurt anyone during your process of healing.
"If I find someone I like, I'll go out with them, alright? But don't set me up with random people"
She huffs, nodding, that's better than nothing.
Since Han is away, you take the opportunity and go to your apartment. You need some books, you have been borrowing Hannah's in an attempt to avoid going there to pick up yours.
There's nothing different in the house, you don't know if you should feel glad or sad about that. Although your life is turned upside down, things are still the same. You are sure you just need a little more time, things will get better soon.
You know that, because it didn't hurt as much as you thought going back to your apartment, you expected it would be much worse. Maybe it's because he's not there? That could be it but you have hope that the overall pain is gone, that it's not going to be so bad when you see him again.
Of course, as Hannah said, a lifelong love won't go away in a month, nor in two or five months, you're not sure even a year is enough but you can't wait until then, he's still your best friend and you miss him like crazy.
You're going to come back home when you're sure you let go of these feelings. Yes, it's going to be hard being with him but it's harder to stay away from your best friend.
So when you feel like you're finally open to meet new people without comparing them to Jisung and not feel like you're tricking them, when you feel like you can like someone else without feeling guilty, that's when you'll know you are starting to get over Han.
You take some clothes out of your wardrobe and put them in the bag with your books. Hannah is coming to pick you up since Seungmin let you use his car while he's away.
"Are you moving, ma'am?" Hannah asks, seeing your huge bag.
"A girl needs to be prepared", you answer and she laughs.
"Do you want some coffee?", you hum in agreement while turning on the radio.
You feel like it's finally peaceful in your head.
>><<
It's been some time since you visited your family, your parents call you every week to check on you and Jisung but when the holidays come you two have to go back home.
That's how you ended up in the car with him, it's not a long trip since you're going just outside of Seoul but it's still awkward.
This is the first time you're seeing each other after the party. The whole trip it seems like Han wants to say something, but he doesn't, he keeps stealing glances at you, opening his mouth and then closing again like he just thought it better to stay in silence.
"For fucks sake, just say what you want to say", you tell him minutes before your arrival at your family’s home.
He flinches, looking at you with puppy eyes.
"I wanted to apologize, about the whole thing at the party", he clears his throat, fidgeting in his seat.
You stare at him for a few seconds. Even though it hurts, the whole situation is less painful then you thought it would be.
When you received the call from your parents telling you to come home with Han on the weekend you couldn't say no, you don't want them to know about all the drama and before you could make up some excuse about Han's schedule they told you he already had agreed to go.
You exchanged messages with him, setting up the time for him to pick you up at Seungmin's place and you dreaded every minute of every day thinking about the moment you would have to face Jisung again.
When you got into his car, you felt uncomfortable. You made some small talk and left at that, hoping he wouldn't keep trying to talk. It's been two months since you confessed, maybe your heart is already accepting the fact that you and your best friend are just that, friends.
Of course it still hurts, you're not sure how you're going to feel seeing him with a girlfriend, but you hope it'll only get easier from now on.
"It's okay", you say. "You were drunk, let's not think too much about it"
"But I hurt you, again", he sighs, looking at you with a frown on his face.
"Yeah, you did", you sigh, "but you're my best friend and you apologized, I'm not going to hold that against you"
He parks the car, but doesn't make any movement to get out. Jisung is staring at his hands, holding the wheel.
"You're too soft on me", he mumbles.
"I know", you smile sadly, "it's just how things are between us", you open your door urging him to get out. You already can imagine your mothers making a fuss about why you stayed so long inside the car instead of going inside.
Your parents come out while you're going through the gate, your mom has a bright smile on her face and is waiting to give you a hug. It's good to be in her embrace again, her warmth makes you feel like everything will be okay.
"You lost so much weight, aren't you taking care of her?" Han's mother scolds him while giving you a hug and feeling you out.
"It's my fault, school is just crazy right now", you tell her, hugging her back.
"Nonetheless, you should eat", she looks back at your mother, "let's double the side dishes we packed for them", and your mom nods, going back inside with her best friend.
You take a deep breath, receiving a sympathetic smile from Han before he goes into the house. It's going to be a long day.
The lunch is somewhat calm, other than the dozens of questions your families ask to you two. About college, about living by yourselves, about Han's trips, how you stay alone and how that's dangerous, they ask about everything like they don't talk to you every week.
"I forgot the ice cream", your father says, slapping the palm of his hand onto his forehead and you can already predict the scolding he's going to receive from your mother. So you jump on your feet, offering to go to the convenience store to buy some.
"Go with her", Han's father says and he nods.
You wish he didn't, it's suffocating being so close to your best friends while still uncertain of your circumstances, but if you say you don't want to, they are going to ask why and having to explain that is going to be worse than spending the day with Jisung.
You walk quietly, looking at the houses on the street. Everything is still the same, other than some renovations made to the old houses there's nothing new. The convenience store is a ten minute walk away from your house. It's good walking a bit after eating so much, the thing you miss the most about living with your parents is your mother's food.
"Which flavor?" Jisung asks while looking into the freezer.
"My mom likes strawberry and yours like chocolate, let's take both", he nods.
"Oh my god, y/n and Jisung?" You hear that damn voice you can't forget even after almost 10 years.
You put on your best smile and turn around slowly.
"Hi, Haneul", you say, poking Han with your elbow, he's still focused on choosing ice cream.
"Oh, hey", he nods at Haneul, closing the freezer.
She eyes you two up and down and smiles.
"Are you finally dating?" She squeals and you can tell she's just being mean.
"No", you answer before Jisung can even open his mouth, he glances at you with a frown.
"I'm sorry, y/n, it seems not every teenage crush works out", she pouts, smiling even more now that she got what she wanted.
You watch as she turns around, walking more deep into the store and you grab the ice creams from Han's hands, going to the cashier to pay for it.
Haneul hated you ever since Jisung dragged you to go on their date in middle school, it's not your fault but you always guessed she blamed you for things not working out with him.
You want to cry, not because you're sad but because you feel humiliated. It's so frustrating knowing that everyone has always known about your feelings for Han, it's even worse to think one day a lot of your school classmates are going to see his wedding pictures with you as the third wheel as always and think of how much of a loser you're.
"How did she know about that?" He asks when you get out of the store.
"I don't think I did a good job at hiding my feelings", you shrug.
Han stops on his tracks, you only realize that after giving a few steps and you look back to see him staring at you with a confused face.
"Was I the only one that didn't know?" He asks and you sigh, you're not really in the mood to have this conversation.
"Our parents probably don't know either", you say and he huffs.
"I'm not joking, y/n! Why didn't you ever tell me?"
"What difference would it make if you knew?" You yell, finally losing it. You can feel the tears brimming in your eyes, but you won't cry, you were finally feeling a bit better and you're not going to waste another tear on this one sided love.
"Things could have been different, I could have been more careful, I could have told you to-"
He stops mid sentence knowing he shouldn't finish the sentence, but it's already too late.
"Would you have told me to move on?" You scoff, looking around to avoid the tears. "It's not that easy Jisung, this is not the same love you felt in your relationships that lasted three months", you know you're just being mean now, but you can't control it, not with all the hurt you're feeling. "I've been in love with you for years, don't you think I was afraid of that? Of you telling me that years of me pining over you were worth nothing?"
You turn around, "tell our parents that I met someone from high school and I'll be back later", you don't give him time to say anything back before you walk away.
After a few minutes, you feel the tears running down your face. At least you avoided crying in front of him.
Why does it have to be so hard? Why can't you just forget about him already? This process is taking too long and too much of your energy.
You sit in the park, wiping your tears and looking at the children playing. Everything was easier when you were at that age, you had no worries other than if it would rain the day you would go play with your friends outside or which present to give your parents on their birthday.
You look at your phone, answering your messages, your mother sent you a text telling you to not stay out too late but you don't think you'll be able to go back and stay in the same room as Han right now.
"Y/n?" You hear a strangely familiar voice, you look up and see a handsome man walking towards you. You're sure you know his face, but you just can't remember who it is.
He sees your frown and laughs.
"Jeongho? From middle school", he tells you and your eyes widen.
"Oh my god, Jeongho! How are you?" You ask and he smiles, he grew up really well. He's much taller now but he's still as handsome.
"I'm doing well, what about you?" He asks, sitting by your side, "are you visiting your family?"
"I'm great", you smile and nod, "yeah, Jisung and I came to visit"
What are the odds of you meeting Haneul and Jeongho of all people right after you confessed to Han? The universe really must be playing with you.
"I heard that you are living in Japan", you continue.
"Yeah, I came here just for the holiday", he explains, "actually, I come by pretty often to Korea", he clears his throat, looking at you. "Are you and Jisung a thing now?" He asks and you smile painfully, why must you answer this question twice in a day?
"No, still just friends", you tell and he smiles.
He nods, mumbling 'ah'.
"And… by any chance are you single?" He asks and you nod, feeling embarrassed. "Well, that's good news for me", he says, receiving a confused look from you while handing you his phone, "mind giving me your number? I'd like to keep in contact with you"
"Oh", you stare at the device for a moment, trying to process what he's saying. Is he interested in you?
"It's okay if you don't want to", he chuckles, "I'm just shooting my shot, knowing you're not with Jisung"
You laugh, releasing the air you didn't even notice you were holding.
"Yeah, sure", you type your number and give it back to him.
He stares at you with a satisfied smile before getting up.
"I have to go now, my family is waiting for me, but I'll text you", he says, flashing a smile and waving goodbye to you.
That was certainly unexpected, you would have never imagined you would meet Jeongho and he would still be interested in you. That lightens up your mood a bit, maybe this time you'll make the right choice and choose the person that likes you back.
You and Han don't share a word on your trip back, you don't want to talk to him and he seems too deep in his thoughts to say anything to you.
You finally can breathe when you get to Seungmin's, he's waiting with Hannah, beer and food, all you needed after this hell of a day.
>><<
You are in a lilac long dress, your friends are all seated in the first row. The church is full of people, some you know, some you're not so sure. You're happy, feeling your heart beat fast and butterflies on your stomach. Jisung is looking directly at you, he smiles with a proud look on his face.
However, before you can step closer to him, a loud piano sound starts playing and after a few seconds you recognize the wedding march. People stand up but they are not looking at you, neither is Han, they are all looking at the church doors where a beautiful woman is entering in a long white dress, a child walks in front of her, throwing roses in her path. The familiar round full cheeks make your stomach sink, why does that child look so much like Han? He doesn't have a younger sibling.
Then, it all sinks in, you're not the bride. Of course not, he's marrying another woman, a beautiful one at that. He's building his life and forming a family and you're just there on the sidelines. The bride steps in front of him and gives you her bouquet, smiling kindly at you.
You open your eyes abruptly, your chest is going up and down at a fast pace and your breathing is heavy, you're soaked in sweat. It was all a dream, a nightmare.
You sit on the sofa, feeling sore, all your muscles are tense. You can't believe you actually dreamt about something like that, your fear of always being there watching your best friend have his own life while still in love with him is taking over, even though you're trying to get over him.
It's two in the morning and you can't go back to sleep. It's better to take a shower and maybe go for a walk to calm your nerves.
The warm bath helps make you relax, but the memories from your dream keeps coming up on your mind again and again.
You text the only person who is probably still awake at this time and your phone buzzes seconds after your message is sent.
“To what do I owe the pleasure of being contacted by my most beautiful friend?” Chan's voice sounds on the other side of the line.
You chuckle.
“I knew you would be awake”, you tell him, fidgeting with your feet while trying to explain what's happening to him without humiliating yourself.
“I had a pretty bad nightmare and wanted to take a walk, maybe eat something? I don't know”, you whisper the last part and Chan sighs, he can tell you're not feeling well.
“Sure, I wanted to take a break anyway”, he says even though he's full of work to do.
You meet at a convenience store nearby, Chan's apartment is not far from Seungmin's since they can't live far away from each other, everyone lives close. You and Jisung did too- cursed man, coming back through your mind even though you're trying to think of anything but him.
“So”, Chan says, taking you out of your thoughts, “Jisungie told me you had a bit of an argument”, he tells you carefully, resting his elbows on the table you two are seated while he holds the beer can.
You sigh, of course he would tell Chan.
“Yeah, we just met someone from middle school during our trip and it ended up like that”, you explain after swallowing a mouthful of the hot spice ramen you have in your hands.
“I know things are not easy right now, for you or for him”, he says carefully, “but you're best friends, you have to communicate and talk things through”
“I guess”, you sigh. It's not easy to talk about Jisung, more so after the dream you had. You thought the worst part was already over, that you were finally getting over him. But it turns out it's not just willingness that makes things happen.
You wake up to your phone buzzing, you look at the time it's almost noon. You look through your messages and can't help but smile, Jeongho has been messaging you everyday since the last time you saw him. It's nice having this kind of attention, he's handsome and nice, maybe it's time for you to open your heart to someone else. The nightmare you had really terrified you, just thinking about it makes your head hurt and your chest ache.
Jeongho: good morning
Jeongho: I'll be in Korea next week, maybe we could have dinner together?
You: morning
You: yeah, that would be great!
You decide to give this a chance, it's not like it is going to kill you and Jeongho is well aware about your longing feelings for Jisung.
You're dressed in a red dress, feeling a bit uncomfortable, formal attire is not your usual outfit choice, but Jeongho set the date in a really fancy restaurant that you're not used to.
Of course you went to fancy restaurants before, the boys took you out often to celebrate their awards and new comebacks but since you always insisted on paying for your meals, they usually went to fancy but still affordable places.
Jisung always offered to pay for your meals, but you never accepted. If he did, you were afraid you would look too much like a couple and your heart might make you even more delusional.
“Good evening, how can I help you?” The receptionist asks and you look around, trying to find your date.
“Hm, hi. I'm here to meet a person, Kang Jeongho?” You eye the list on the counter to try and see if his name is there.
“Yes, mr. Kang is waiting”, he tells you, “may I take your coat?” He asks, gesturing to the long cover you have over you.
“Ah, yes”, you say, taking the piece and giving it to him.
The man gestures for you to follow and you walk behind him to the second floor. Jeongho is waiting at a table close to the window, he's looking at the view that you can see now it's marvelous.
“Mr. Kang”, the receptionist says and Jeongho turns around, giving you a big bright smile while standing up.
“Thank you”, he tells the man who nods at you and walks back to the first floor. “You look beautiful”, he tells you, pulling the chair so you can sit.
“Thank you, I didn't even know there was a second floor in this restaurant”, you say while watching him take his seat.
“Yes, they only open it on special occasions”, he says and you frown, looking around.
“You mean, they opened it so we could eat here?”
He nods, chuckling to your terrified face.
“What are you, the president’s son?” You joke, nervously, suddenly feeling absolutely out of place and underdressed.
“Not at all, you know my father and he's far away from politics”, he jokes back, “I’m friends with the son of the owner, he owed me one so I just asked for a favor”, he shrugs.
You look dumbfounded, who is this guy? Surely not the same teenager that looked absolutely heartbroken when you rejected him in middle school.
“What did you do for him to go to such lengths to pay you back?” You ask, curious.
“I introduced him to his wife”, he smiles, “he's madly in love with her, so this was nothing to how grateful he is to me”
“Oh”, you nod. That must be nice, having someone madly in love with you.
The waiter interrupts your interrogation to ask for your orders, you have no idea what to choose, but Jeongho explains to you each dish, asking if you would like something more spicy, salty or sweet and telling which one he thought you'd like better based on your answers.
“You know, you were my first crush”, Jeongho blurts out after the waiter takes the plates back to the kitchen. You feel your whole face hot, looking at him with wide eyes, “I'm sorry, I just thought you should know”, he smiles and you notice he has some deep dimples in his cheeks.
“I thought you asked me out in middle school because you lost a bet or something”, you put your hands to your cheeks, trying to ease the redness.
“I think you never gave yourself enough credit”, he points out, leaning his face on his hand while watching you. “You were always too focused on Jisung to actually see that I was not the only one looking at you with heart eyes”
You smile sheepishly, you knew your crush on your best friend was going to come up in the conversation at some point, but now that it did you don't know how to talk about it.
“Well, I found out not long ago that I was not as good as I thought at hiding my feelings”, you tell him, “apparently everyone knew that I liked my best friend—except him”
“Am I right to presume that you still have those feelings?” He asks slyly, your heart is beating fast, what if you tell him the truth and he says he doesn't want to see you anymore?
“Actually-”, you sigh, “I'm trying to get over them at the moment”
It's better he knows the truth, so he can enter this aware of your standing.
“Well, that's more than I expected”, he chuckles and you look at him confused, “I thought you were still hang up on him”
“I actually confessed”, you're feeling a bit more confident after his reaction, “and I was rejected, so I don't think there's much for me to hang on anymore”
“So, I'm sorry if I'm being too straightforward- but could I be greedy and believe I have a chance?” He asks and you're sure his eyes are wavering a bit, is he nervous? Did you actually make someone feel that way because of you?
“Yes”, you tell him, biting back a smile and blushing, he smiles at you sighing in relief.
He stands up and reaches his hand out to you.
“Then, shall we take a walk? I have a long way to make you fall for me”, he bites his bottom lip, waiting for you to take his hand.
This is it, the first step for you to get over Han Jisung.
Han sees Lia's lips move but he can't actually hear what she's saying, every word you said the last time, keeps sounding on his mind like a bloody curse.
What would he have done if he had known sooner? Would he have liked you back? Surely not, after all these years he didn't feel anything romantically related towards you, but that may be because he never thought about you in that way. Would he have told you to move on?
"Are you listening?" Jisung hears Lia say and snaps out of his thoughts.
"Yes, of course", he lies, giving her a slight smile and grabbing her hand to squeeze it.
"You're just… acting strange, since you came back from your parent’s house", she frowns.
"It's nothing, I just… had an argument with y/n and now she's mad at me", he tells a half truth.
"I'm sure she's going to forgive you", Lia says, sympathetically, "you're best friends after all"
Han nods, sighing.
He had avoided telling her the whole situation with you, it could make her insecure since you two live together.
There's something different too, he just doesn't feel the same way about her anymore, the burning flame and excitement he felt when they first started going out is slowly dying down and he just doesn't know what to do anymore.
All his previous relationships ended up because he was too busy, or because his personality didn't actually match with the other person, sometimes the girl he was dating just felt uncomfortable about his friendship with you, but he couldn't end years of friendship because he was dating so he ended the relationship.
However, Lia is different. She's great and confident, she doesn't care that he lives with you because she trusts him. She's calm, her personality is nice, she's nice. So why? Why is he feeling like this suddenly? Why is he wavering when it comes to starting this new relationship?
When he gets to practice after a weekend of resting, he is still confused, however, he's trying his best to stay focused on their new album, music is the only thing he is sure of in his life right now.
It's half past the time practice should start and Seungmin is not there yet, after one more song he asks Bangchan about it, he's starting to get worried, what if something happened to you?
“Oh, don't worry about it, he's just interviewing his roommate prospect”, Chan answers.
Han freezes. Then, that means you're going back home?
------------------
A/N: If you like what I write please reblog or let me know in the comments, feedback gives me motivation to keep writing.
Taglist(I won't be tagging people without age in their profile or blank blogs in my content)
@hhwangsmoon @weareapackofstrays @shycreationdreamland @adestayskz @skizmee @ca11me3mily @realviviboss @sofix-hc7 @seungminsapuppy @starsandrqindrops @its-hannjisung @redstayrosie @mae-is-cute98
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nishnormp · 1 month ago
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conagher brainrot
Sometimes I think about the fact that in Loose Cannon, dell's father never gets alluded to . like at all . Fred as the shabby little bridge between radigan and dell makes me a little sad though, so I'll just be looking at weird implications and make a poorly organized set of points
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With how confidently Dell talks about his grandfather's personality and the state of his blueprints, I can only assume that a)he was practically raised by him or, b)his dad talked a lot about him (and by extension fred and radigan were close) while radigan was off doing...whatever
Dell is a genius, but a lot of his gear (most, actually) comes from his grandfather's blueprints (gunslinger over there was radigan's original design). Hell, even dell's iconic sentry gun was radigan's blueprint.
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If you look at the first panel I showed, dell is immediately hesitant of his ability to fix it, but switches up just as fast when blutarch mentioned radigan's blueprints, blutarch even mentions that they've plagued him for 60ish years bc they were written in complete gibberish. HOWEVER, bluetarch has also been shown to be a complete idiot, so its possible that the blueprints were in english, but just completely incomprehensible to him.
Now, lets go back to the A and B scenarios earlier. The reason I mentioned some estrangement between family members is because things start to...not make sense. Let's say that all three conaghers were quite close (with fred somehow not having any time conflicts with his job and all), how come dell never alludes to him at all when referring to a 'mr conagher' in the field? How come fred never told him that radigan's blueprints were exhumed after his death? Dell's spy domination voicelines drops the lore that it was his dad that taught him how to deal with backstabbers, so if they were open about the nature of their work how come that one important tidbit was never told to him? There could maybe be some physical distance due to work and whatnot, but I cant imagine fred not revealing that about his father to his own son.
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There's also...whatever this picture is. This is a photo of radigan in the years proceeding his influence under australium, which conflicts with the comics' and dell's portrayal of him. Its possible that this is merely him a few more years down the road, when both fred and dell are fully grown and out by themselves- but in that case that would be a TIGHT window for his death, blutarch's 60-year stressing over deciphering his notes WHILE fred's still in BLU, and the news to reach dell by the time HE'S the new engie.
The fact that fred is still up and kicking in the current day (hes pushing in the 70 at the VERY LEAST) also makes the timeline stricter, since theres no way he was born during radigan's youth (makes the estrangement thing more likely too cuz are you telling me that fred never corrected dell at all/dell dgaf that radigan was more like a jolly aussie than anything, or that they BOTH didn't know too much about him)
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The hundred years thing is maaybe an exaggeration, I did the math and there's no way a literal hundred years had passed between the creation of the first LEM and dell's employment (this is with the consideration of 1890 being the absolute earliest time, and even then it reached 1990). HOWEVER the half a century (or 50 years) thing is probably, as it lands square into the 1940s-- a decade into fred's employment in BLU.
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The 1890s was when Radigan was called to create the machine, and its also the time that is referred to right after the 60 years thing. So if the machine was built 60 years ago, but only started to malfunction around the 50 year mark; then there would be one entire decade of the thing just breaking down with no one to fix it.
Did fred get access to the notes? I'm not actually sure. There's this moment in the comics where he flubbs with the immortality machines, but I think there's more to it
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"more biology than engineering" my brother in christ you have fully functional prosthetic LEGS and your guy best friend (who btw is a sniper aka guy whose profession relies on eyesight the most) let you pluck out his eyes and replace them with better ones. There's also the offhand mention of "lookin' at the old man's robots" aka probably referring to radigan's creations, but if we go by the thinking that radigan's notes were never shown to him-- that would mean he was reverse engineering them.
And honestly? It makes sense, esp if you consider tfc engie's gear in his own game.
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TFC was created waaay before tf2 so the lore implications were most likely not intended at all, but just. Compare fred's sentry guns to the blueprints that radigan has on the walls of his workshop. The dispenser and the teleporter? Way different, and the dispenser even functions differently (it has to be restocked, but it can also damage people when it is destroyed by tfc engie). Fred had big shoes to fill, but he managed to live up to them anyways; I think cheavy would have kicked him out otherwise. The TFC gen is more militant than tf2's, and with how tightly cheavy runs his crew + is concerned about formal standards (like him not wanting to hire tf2 medic due to a history of medical misdemeanors), fred would have been long gone if his creations weren't up to par.
Keep in mind that most of the world is still kinda bummy while australia (and ig new zealand) have all the super fancy stuff to themselves (with the way aussies act with other non-aussies I highly doubt that they would just hand over their own formulas for Teleportation Tech) (these war-loving guys even canonically hid up the existence of australium too, and there's a newspaper clip showing a headline of the aussies calling the discovery of magic gold a false alarm) so fred figuring out all that shit on his own is kinda impressive.
But lets say that he DID have access to the blueprints. Did he deviate from them out of stubbornness? The want to be his own man? Was he smart enough to figure out the fundamentals, but eventually failed to understand the sheer complexity of the LEM? Or did he actually do work on it, but ended up not being significant enough? If the LEM started breaking down by the 1940s, is it really possible for it to STILL keep chugging for an entire decade without human intervention? Did he knowingly lie about the immortality machines cuz he didn't want a deranged cheavy to live forever, or was he actually thinking ahead and taking the potential australium shortage into account (esp since the thing cheavy was holding was a more greedy, simpler model)?
Still, whether or not he had access to the blueprints doesn't change the bits about virgil's eyes or his prosthetic legs. I know they knew each other before the war (gravel war, world war, idk) but it would still be a huge risk for a sniper to just let someone pluck his eyes out; that sort of trust takes a looot of time and experiences.
Tldr; fred is a smart little cookie and I think he gets underestimated too much : ( . also my math isn't the best so if I get anything wrong pls pls pls correct me
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blublublujk · 11 months ago
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bound 2 (falling in love)
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oneshot
word count: 6.5k
genre: fwb to lovers
pairing: yoongi x reader
summary:
You and Yoongi were okay with being friends with benefits... until you weren't.
warnings: i tried to focus on fluff (did you catch it or did i fail), explicit sexual content; unprotected sex (they make love to each other), choking and breath play (hello it's yoongi), multiple orgasms, slight overstimulation, crying (is it really my ff if there's no crying involved), creampie, very cute aftercare and i think that’s all, this is more sweet than anything lol
a.n: believe it or not this wasn't apart of my drafts i wrote this all one night because i couldn't sleep so thank my insomnia for this, it was about time i write about yoongi :D
also i noticed a lot of you are reading it was destiny and love always wins and i wish you guys wouldn't only because i plan to rewrite some of it and continue them at a further time (chaptered ffs are so hard for me rn since i don't have all the time in the world to dedicate myself to them but i promise to be back with those two series) thank you for everyone who takes time to read what i write it really means so much and your comments have been so motivating. thank you so fucking much for 2k notes on good girl, gone bad i havent seen numbers like that ever im so so grateful, thank you from the bottom of my heart. i'll try to be back one or two more times this month and happy late birthday to me hehe <3
—> m.list
—> welcome me on ao3 & twt
—-
It happened again.
Another failed date to add to the sad list of people that simply will never workout for you.
The list was growing longer as months passed. When you started this list, it was barely the start of a very hot summer. Probably the hottest it’s been in years, one can only assume the winter will not be any easier. 
And you were right. Winter was only beginning and it was brutally cold. The streets were moist from the previous night of harsh rainfall. 
What better time to date and settle down than now. When the world gives you rain, settle for the warm arms of a lover.
Unfortunately, you made a grave mistake thinking this would come easy. Ten first dates later and you are still very single and loverless. 
It is not easy to go out during a time like now, suffering at the sight of happy couples and their stupid happy lives. Really, it should disgust you. It used to. The whole concept of devoting your entire life to someone. The need to constantly feel the tender touch of another person. The desire to fall in love and do it all over again, you get it now. At least, you think you do. 
“I don’t think this is gonna work.” The words fall from your mouth in a quiet rush. The man across you sits in silence before he smiles in his loss. 
“Don’t worry, I figured. It seems your mind was elsewhere. I know you don’t want to pursue anything romantically, and that’s fine with me, but is everything okay?” 
Is everything okay? Well currently, yeah you’re okay. As for your heart, it’s heavy and strangely, you feel there’s a hole in your chest and it needs to be filled. That would fix things, you think. You have been single for so long that you forgot what it was like to love and cherish someone. Not that you have ever truly loved or cherished anyone, but you’ve gotten close. If a silly relationship you had in your sophomore year of high school counts. Then yes, you’ve totally been in love. 
“I’m okay. Thanks for asking. I didn’t mean to lead you on, if it ever felt like I did.” The apology seems bitter in your mouth. Another failed fucking attempt. How difficult can dating be? Have you really been this disconnected with the world around you? 
“Don’t stress it! Things happen. I hope you can find what you’re looking for. See you… around?” The man’s understanding response makes you feel worse. Maybe you should consider deleting Tinder and finding love naturally, if that’s still a thing in the contemporary life. 
“Yeah, totally!” And like that you’re off to the next. Giving yourself plenty of time to bathe in your disappointment and miserably cry about your failed attempts at finding what you’ve been missing. Who knew dating could be so difficult?
The walk back home is just as cold as the outcome of today’s date. Your date insisted he could drive you home and if not that then pay for a cab, but you didn’t live too far from the restaurant you both met at. Though he insisted, you figured this walk could refresh you after yet another failure. You were starting to regret it as the cold wind started roughly hitting your skin. Preserving the chilly weather, you genuinely couldn’t wait to get home and wrap yourself in a bundle of warm blankets and comfortable clothes. 
Cold hands struggle to open your door, you blow on them with warm puffs of breaths, soon making your way in and getting comfortable in your humble apartment. 
yoon: you up?
And that, that is what made this harder. The fact that you knew there was someone completely capable of loving and caring for you the way you desired. You have seen it with your own eyes. Every time you ended up in his bed, in his arms, you felt it. Deep down you know something is there and that something beats everything else. Maybe you’re just delusional, but you look for him in everyone else and you hate it. Hate because you will never be anything more than his personal little whore that comes at the sound of his call. 
me: yeah
Normally, you aren’t dry over texts, especially not with him so he’ll see right through you. You’re hoping for once, he can ignore it. 
He won't. 
yoon: you ok?
me: been better
yoon: wanna talk about it?
me: no, i'm ok
yoon: ok, wanna come over? 
Yes, because during a time like this all you want is the comfort and warmth of someone else’s touch and Yoongi has never failed at giving that to you. But he is not yours.
And you are not his. 
me: not feeling well. sorry.
yoon: sick? 
A white lie never hurt anyone. 
me: yeah, throat hurts
yoon: im sorry 
me: it's not your fault maybe another time.
Though you really shouldn’t say that. There should be no next time. That way you don’t suffer any longer and drag him down with you, considering everything you’ve been feeling and dealing with lately. It’s not fair to Yoongi, but especially yourself.
He doesn’t reply anymore and you can’t even hide your disappointment. You aren’t disappointed at him, okay maybe a little bit at him, but mainly yourself and your recently found complicated feelings. 
You and Yoongi started this whole mess a year ago, before you even realized what you truly wanted. It started off with subtle flirting here and there. They say not to mess with coworkers, given that it can complicate things at work and one should never play with their main source of income, but you did it anyway. You are still young and he only made you feel younger, like a teenage girl crushing over her forbidden crush at church. It was silly, but Yoongi made it easy. 
The flirting turned to one thing, then another. 
“We shouldn’t, not here.” Yoongi had you pinned outside the club you both worked at, leaving trails of wet kisses down your throat.
“Five more minutes.” His words were muffled into your skin as his hands explored your body. Yoongi’s touch was always way too soft for his own good and you fell victim to his deadly warmth. 
“If Mr. Kim finds out, he’ll kill us and fire us both.” That was a bit dramatic on your part and you swore you felt the taller smiling against your neck.
Yoongi drops one last kiss on your cheek as his hot breath hits your ear. “Not if I kill him first.”
You gasped, pushing him off you with a quick smack to his chest. “D-Don’t even joke like that.” 
Yoongi just laughed. 
“Okay, okay baby.” The term of endearment fell from his lips too easily and you melted into the dark night. “See you after work?” 
You only nodded, not being able to deny his temporary warmth and sweet presence. Then he dropped a kiss on your lips, leaving you just as quick as when he first found you. You were fucked.
From there, it only got worse for your sake. Your heart could only take so much. 
Really, you should blame things on him. It was his fault you fell in love with him and his stupidly soft hands. It was all his fault! He left you no choice but to love the feel of his lips against your skin, to easily melt under his soft gaze, and find comfort in his unnecessarily warm bed. Yoongi was perfect. Everything you could ever want. 
That’s why it was so fucking hard. Dating was hard enough, but after feeling Yoongi’s intimate touch, you were a complete goner. Though he was far from it, Yoongi touched you like you were his and he would fuck you like a lover would. Kissing and making love to you as if you were the most beautiful woman on Earth. It was all too much. 
Fuck, you really needed to get a grip.
The knock on your door makes you jump from your couch. 
Ten minutes longer and you would have fallen asleep exactly where you were lying. In outside clothes and all. You didn’t even bother taking off the outfit you had carefully planned thinking that this lucky outfit would have finally taken you somewhere. It didn’t. 
“Coming!” There’s not a single person that should be outside your door, especially at this hour. Your feet make their way to the door regardless and the blood from your face drains when you see the person standing behind the door. 
Quickly, you unlock your front door, rushing the taller inside. “Hurry! It’s freezing! What are you doing out here?” 
Yoongi’s cheeks are surely frozen, a pink dust decorates his cheeks and the tip of his nose. It almost makes him look cute. You were far more gone than you imagined. 
He hustles inside, carrying a fairly large brown bag with him. He brought… groceries? 
“Took you long enough.” The taller one makes himself at home, laying his bag on your coffee table. 
“What are you even doing here?” You ask again. 
He ignores you. “Thought you said you were sick. You don’t look very sick?” 
Yoongi looks at you with a questioning look, his eyes wander your outfit and guilt starts eating your insides. 
You cross your arms, an attempt to hide yourself in shame, but what’s done is done. “I- I had plans.” 
“Yeah, I see that.” He simply says, standing awkwardly in your living area. 
If this doesn’t convince you to delete that forsaken app for the sake of your dignity and shameful behavior, you don’t know what will.
“Anyways, w-what brings you here?” 
“Brought you some stuff.” His hand waves over to the bag he carried inside. 
“Stuff?” You question, a bit dumbfounded, planted still in your place.
“Tea, cough drops, some soup I made earlier this week. Oh and flowers.” Yoongi doesn’t seem at all embarrassed or fazed about the situation. Not that he should be, but he speaks with a puff to his chest, as if he wanted to ensure you understood his every word and action. Like any concerned lover would be. As if he was yours and you were his.
Oh.
This was so so bad. For you and your weak heart. Fuck.
“I-“ 
He cuts you off before you even get to speak. “I don’t know if you’ll like it. It’s just some plain seaweed soup. Usually helps me when I’m sick. I’m not sure what flowers you like, or if you even like flowers. Do you? Their tulips. I did a bit of research before. My mom likes tulips. I figured you might like them too.” 
He did research? Double fuck! 
Yoongi was nervously rambling, now he was slightly embarrassed. Pink flushes his cheeks and it wasn’t the weather’s doing this time. 
“Yoongi…” You start breathlessly and in disbelief. 
“What?” He nearly stutters, his hand is shaking. He’s nervous. Who would have thought? 
“Why.” Is all you manage to ask. 
“You were sick.” Is all he replies. As if things were really that simple. What next? Would he come rushing to the hospital if you suddenly fell ill? God forbid, but it was a valid question. 
What was going on? For a second, you entertain the idea. Maybe he fell in love between the blurry lines of this complicated relationship. Were the shared intimate memories too special for him to forget too? You weren’t sure anymore, but what did this all mean? Maybe he loves you, as much as you love him.
Thoughts keep spinning and you wish there was an easier way to turn off your brain. Not now.
“I know, but why? Why all this? Why for me?” Your vulnerability is showing and it makes you feel weak. Maybe your hands are shaking too. 
“I don't understand?” Yoongi searches for the answer in your glossy eyes, he’s tempted to reach out and comfort you. Have you in his hands, but he’s too coward. He doesn’t want you to feel the shiver of his touch right now. His vulnerability peaks through as well. 
Why not you? It’s always going to be you. 
“I-I’m nothing to you.” There’s a shiver again and then you break. 
Yoongi doesn’t care anymore. He’ll consider the consequences later. Right now, none of it matters.
His hands hold your face, ready to wipe the tears that threaten to leak from your precious eyes. He hopes his hands aren't cold anymore from standing outside for so damn long, but he couldn’t stop himself, in his selfishness and all.
His hands shake slightly, trying to stay strong as he lays it all on the table. “Y/N, you’re everything to me.” He whispers, eyes never leaving yours.
You lay your own hands on his, you feel so delicate around him when you wrap warm hands around his cold wrists.
“I-I am?” You ask between sniffles. His hands are still pretty cold, but they’ll soon warm up against your soft skin. Nobody knows how desperately you need to be touched until you are and then it’s like little fireworks spark inside your body. It consumes you in the best way possible.
“Of course. I thought I made that obvious.” His eyes are soft, different to how he typically looks at you, but you’ve seen these same eyes before. They are no stranger. It’s similar to the look he gives you when you catch him staring at you while you are deep in work. He pretends to look away as if he wasn’t admiring you from afar and you pretend that you don’t notice his curious eyes. It’s the same look he has after you both end up in heated makeout sessions, behind the rusty club you both work at. And it’s definitely the same look he has while he settles on top of you, whispering sweet words of praise and promise.
Nothing should feel different but it just does, there’s something in the way he looks down at you that lets you know that everything you’ve been searching for has always been right here. Right where you’ve been all along.
The taller leans in and you freeze struggling to keep your eyes on his. Yoongi’s thumb brushes against your cheek with a soft touch. You were fragile between his hands and he’s willing to do anything to keep his precious flower safe. “Can I kiss you?” 
“Yes. Please.” You whisper back in a hurry, scared that this would be nothing but a dream. It wasn’t time for you to wake up yet.
His eyes zero-in on your lips and then he’s kissing you. It’s not much different from other times. After all, you guys have shared plenty of kisses, probably more than you should have considering you guys were friends with benefits, at most. But this time, the kiss isn’t just a careless lust-filled doing, no this time the kiss is a promise. The promise to never again allow you to question his feelings and intentions towards you. 
If Yoongi has to spend his whole life making this up to you, he simply would because that’s how much you meant to him. He can’t believe he even let this go on for this long. He should have been more clear and careful, but he doesn’t regret a damn thing. Not when he has all the time in the world to repair the time lost. And especially not when his reckless actions led him to this. To you.
Yoongi’s lips are soft and bend with yours with ease. He takes his time, never in a rush. Especially not when he has you in-hand. 
The taller doesn’t escalate the kiss. He keeps it sweet and gentle, like he always has been. “I’m so sorry baby.” 
Kiss.
“For?” 
Kiss.
Yoongi has the whole world in his hands right now as he looks down into the sparkles in your eyes and he’s never been so sure about anything in his life. “For being a fucking idiot.”
Kiss. 
“It’s okay.” A kiss is shared again. “I was an idiot too. I was just scared that you wouldn’t want that with me.” 
“Want what?” The taller questions, fingers trailing your face, admiring the imperfections and all. 
“A relationship, I mean. You seemed content with how our relationship already was. I was afraid of losing that. Of losing you.” You admit, eyes fluttering at his touch. 
“Of course, I want that. I want that and more. I-I’m not the best with relationships. I’m only saying this because I want to be open and honest with you. There’s not a second you aren’t on my mind. While at work, you are all I can see. In a crowd of a hundred, my eyes always find yours. I don’t know how to explain what you do to me. But I don’t mind. I think if I ever lost that, I would lose my mind. So I’m sorry if I ever made you feel the opposite. There’s so much more I want to say, but I just don’t know how. I want that. I want that so bad. A relationship and whatever more you give me. I might not be the best boyfriend but I’ll do whatever it takes. I- I love you.” Yoongi’s words are heartfelt and he’s so relieved. One because he’s been keeping this in for so long, any longer and he would have exploded, but second because he’s been dying to say those three words. He really does love you and Yoongi doesn’t love many people in life, but if he had to choose, it’s always gonna be you. 
The tears that were creeping on your eye-lids fall prettily down your face, but Yoongi comes to your rescue. He’s quick to wipe them off your pretty face, tempted to kiss them away, but he keeps that in for now. “Y-Yoongi… I love you too. So much. I think I always have. You are so easy to love. The way you look at me, care for me, and always show up for me. That says more about you than anything else. I tried dating to get over what I felt for you, as you can probably tell, but nothing worked. It was so easy, Yoongi. So easy to fall in love with you. You’re perfect and I don’t doubt that you’ll be the best even after all this. I love you.”
“I love you too, I love you. Fuck, I love you.” Yoongi kisses you again and this time he isn’t as gentle. His lips are still soft as ever as they curl around yours. His tongue comes out and you immediately allow access, letting him explore your mouth. The taste is much better now that there isn’t anything you both are holding back. Everything down on the line and you couldn’t be happier. The hole in your heart was never empty, it was just waiting for this exact moment to remind you that you’ve always had it all. 
“Yoongi.” In between breaths you call his name and Yoongi feels his knees lock. “Take me to bed.” 
Yoongi just nods in a trance with the way your tone drips of arousal. A long strand of hair falls on his face when he picks you up with ease off your feet. He takes you to the place he’s had the honor to visit a hundred times before, but it’s different this time, much different. 
In the process of it all, something falls and it causes you both to laugh until you run out of breath. 
“I can’t believe that just happened.” You laugh into his ear. “You owe me a new lamp. My mother bought me that, you know. House-warming gift.”
“Fuck, sorry.” Yoongi mumbles near a whisper as he grips you harder like he’s afraid he might drop you next and the idea makes you giggle because you know he would never purposely hurt you. “I’ll apologize to your mother directly. Buy you and her a new lamp, whatever it takes.”
“What makes you think you are meeting my mother?” You tease with a smile on your face, watching the blush rise on his cheeks. 
“Well, I figured we could, you know, if you would like–” Yoongi doesn’t often get shy about many things but he can’t keep calm around you and that kills him softly.
“I’m just teasing you.” You say and he bites his lip. “Of course you’ll meet my mother and my father and my nosy ass family. I hope you like annoying, persistent grandma’s that stuff you full. My grandma’s the worst of her kind, but she’ll love you.”
“I would love to.” Yoongi simply replies, still whispering as if you guys had to keep quiet or else you’d be in deep trouble. 
“Why are we still whispering?” You whisper back, roaming fingers through his long, gorgeous hair. He needs to remind you to thank his mother personally for insisting he keep his hair long because it made him look pretty and you could never disagree. Yoongi’s so pretty. 
“I-I don’t know.” 
You both smile at each other before sharing another kiss. It’s so sweet and if you weren’t already off your feet, you would be floating by now. He’s gentle when letting you drop into the sheets below, he finds space between your legs and you wrap them around his hips. Lips still in contact, never losing the plushy feel. 
Everything starts to feel hot. Your hips start to slowly grind against his begging for any sort of friction. But the kissing doesn’t stop. 
Not when you start whining against his lips. 
Not even when Yoongi starts trailing his fingers down your waist and around your curves. He teases his fingertips against your waistline, soft to the touch. 
It’s not until you mewl loudly into his mouth, skillful tongue playing with yours, as you feel him start unbuckling your pants, button-by-button. 
Yoongi’s eyes are heavy-lidded, his gaze burning fire. “Gonna take care of you now, is that okay?” 
You furiously nod, coming up to kiss him once more, both your lips are raw and sensitive, but it gives you more of a reason to fix it with even more kisses. 
He drops one quick kiss onto your mouth before he trails down your jaw. Yoongi breathes in the sweet scent on your skin, wishing he could feel you even closer. “Smell so damn good.”
His voice is raspy against your ear and it makes you blush, while you feel his hand finally touch you where you had been aching with need. “Wanna hear you.”
Breathing lightly, you whisper. “Make me.” 
And of course, Yoongi makes you regret how fast you said the words because he delves his fingers forward with little resistance. Two fingers stretch you at the same time, gasping at the sudden sensation. 
By now, you were molded to fit Yoongi’s fingers. On days where you were really in need, you would take four, all at once. Yoongi was best at reading every expression, every crease and scrunch to your face, especially emotions. He knew exactly how to curve his fingers, the way to build you up, and bring you back down. Yoongi knew it all and he was so lucky too. 
He never anticipated it would have gone this far. It was just sex to begin with. But who were you both kidding, it was always much, much more. 
Yoongi curves his fingers in the way he’s used to and watches your mouth drop, sweet noises soon leaving your lips. “Feels good?” 
There’s no need to ask because he can tell. Your expression tells him everything he needs to know. That and the fact that you are dripping around his fingers but it’s sexier hearing it from you. 
“Yeah… f-feels so good.” With his other hand he tugs your clothes off, leaving you bare on the bottom. Remembering the first few times is a bit embarrassing, but Yoongi always made sure to take his time and make you feel comfortable. It was special and memorable in its own way, and Yoongi felt it too. 
This is unlike any first time, but it was technically the first time you could officially make love to each other until you fall lovesick and that had to be impossible around someone like Yoongi. 
“Hold your legs open for me, flower.” You try to ignore the warm feeling that buzzes in your chest, but you are sure your face says it all. Without another word, you spread your legs open, tucking both hands behind your thighs.
“Flower?” You breathe out with a bit of a struggle as his two fingers continue to pump deep inside you, brushing repeatedly against your g-spot. 
“Do you not like it?” Yoongi smiles slightly, biting his bottom lip while he watches you start to tremble, making the prettiest sounds. 
“I do. Why the new name?” Voice a bit unsteady but it does the job. Yoongi thinks of all the times he thought you were as pretty as a flower, which really was all the time. Especially, in the way he has you right now. Pretty, pretty as a flower. 
“I’ve always wanted to call you that. You’re pretty, sweet, delicate. Just like a flower.” He justifies his reasoning and you melt into puddles. 
“Yoongi.” Voice sweet as honey. 
“Yes baby.” He replies with ease.
“Make love to me, Yoongi.” 
There was a time in his life where Yoongi believed he could live without love. How foolish of him to think so. When he met you, it was a complete three-sixty. Suddenly, Yoongi started to look forward to his shit job. He looked forward to that time between breaks where he could admire you from the back like a pinning loser. Yoongi even started to like the walks he had to take to get to work because he knew that the path would eventually lead to you. He started looking forward to tomorrow's and to the bright future that led ahead. His mom would often complain that he was wasting his life away waiting for it to start, but Yoongi thinks life truly started the day he met you. 
It was a bit awkward because you couldn’t even look him in the eyes, intimated by the staff and new environment. You had previously worked in different bars so you assumed it would be no different and it wasn’t, but the intimidation of a new job was there nonetheless. Yoongi was there every step of the way. He had a crush on the new employee and you needed help on fitting in. Either way, your friendship was very platonic until it wasn’t. 
Yoongi knows he should have said something along the lines “hey, maybe we shouldn't be doing this anymore. I’m in love with you and I have been since you started working here” but the stupid words never made it out. He felt it would be too much to hear and it would only make him look like a complete loser. 
And you felt the same. It was silly really, because everyone around you knew it and there was no reason to fear someone as easy going and non-judgemental as Yoongi, nonetheless it brought you both here. After many failed dating attempts, you were finally happy and in the arms of someone who you truly love and want to be loved by. 
There was a time in his life where Yoongi believed he could live without love, now Yoongi believes your precious, sweet love brought him back to life and he wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. 
Clothes now discarded on the floor, heavy breathing filling the room, and Yoongi could get wasted on the smell of your intoxicating perfume. “Breathe flower.”
Yoongi felt you shiver at the sound of his words, throwing your head back as he thrusts you full of cock. He pushes inside you with gentle movements, struggling to keep himself up while feeling the tug of your warm velvet-like walls. 
You gasp feeling him hit your cervix in a calm, slow pace. It was breathtaking regardless of the gentle rhythm. “You’re so deep...”
“I know flower, breathe baby, breathe.” He is struggling to keep from coming inside you, overwhelmed by his own emotions as your eyes roll back, feeling the pressure rise in your belly. Without a condom, everything feels so different from other times, feeling every ridge and crease fold inside your drenching heat. You take him so nicely, like you always have. Like you’ve always belonged to him. 
You don’t even notice you stopped breathing until you start feeling lightheaded and desperate for fresh air. Breathing just as much as necessary so you don’t faint, you shake your head against his hold, his eyes watch yours, observing with curiosity. 
“No?”
“Mm, n-no.” You shake your head again, whimpering when you feel him kiss your cervix with his swollen tip, over and over and over. “Can– can you…”
“Can I what, pretty flower?” Yoongi rolls his hips a bit faster, feeling his orgasm build too quickly. He wishes he could have days with you like this always. Days to love and worship you from head to toe.
“Choke me.” You manage to say. “Don— don’t wanna breathe.” 
Yoongi growls deep, increasing his speed even more, desperate to fill the deepest part of your glistening folds. He feels you tense underneath, the sounds coming from your mouth are loud enough for your neighbors to hear, but Yoongi stopped giving a fuck about everything around him. 
He places a hand on your throat and squeezes gently, not blocking off your airways completely, but leaving you just enough air to work with. It drives you insane. The more you breathe, his rough thrusts take the air out from your lungs and the process repeats. It feels so good.  
“M-more. Harder.” You barely hear your own words, but Yoongi seems to understand because his dick is moving rapidly inside you, nearly splitting you in two. You wrap both hands around his wrist, loving the heavy weight against your chest. It’ll end too soon and it disappoints you in a way, but you have all the time in the world to make this up. “G-Gonna come.” 
Yoongi nods, concentrating on the way your face scrunches with pleasure. With love. The way your eyes tell him a story. God, Yoongi’s madly in love. “Come, my precious flower.” 
With those final words, you come on his bare slick cock, blossoming in the blissful afterglow. Yoongi doesn’t stop thrusting inside you, but he takes his hand off your throat, kissing your face gently when he sees tears start leaking down your cheeks. 
“It’s okay, you’re okay baby. Breathe for me. Slowly.” Yoongi’s words bring you back down and you throw your arms around him, crying against his shoulder. You don’t even know what invoked this strong emotion to sob your eyes out, but Yoongi allows it, caressing the back of your head. Yoongi doesn’t judge, he only holds you until you settle down. “It’s okay baby, let it out. Breathe, pretty flower.” 
“C-Come inside muh-me, please.” Even after all that, you still beg for him and Yoongi wants to laugh but for your sake and the fact that it’s endearing to him, he delivers accordingly without further questions. 
Right as he’s going to paint your walls white, he pushes himself up with one hand, still holding you with the other. “You sure?”
You’re confused about the sudden question, the tears still decorate your face but then you understand. “Birth control. Just come in me Yoongi, fuck me, fu-fuck.”
Yoongi doesn’t hesitate to regain his brutal pace, fucking you with purpose. Not that he doesn’t want kids in the near future, but he sure as hell doesn’t want any right now. He’s glad you are on the same page but maybe one day the conversation would spark and he wouldn’t want the mother of his kids to be anyone else but you. You were perfect for him. 
“Gonna come.” That’s the only warning you get, then he’s emptying himself inside your tight walls. He doesn’t stop rolling his hips, his slit leaking puddles, until he’s pumped himself dry. With one last thrust, he groans and carefully pulls out. 
He brings you with him, head falling against his chest as he continues to play with your hair, leaving kisses into your bare shoulders. “You okay baby?”
“Perfect. Feel so good.” You mumble into his skin, feeling around his waist. “I’m leaking your come into the sheets though.”
“I’ll take care of it, pretty flower.” You nod sleepily into his chest with a quiet ‘thank you’, feeling completely sated and satisfied, aching with exhaustion. “Sleep baby, I got you.”
With that, you fall deep into the shackles of sleep. Yoongi rubs your back until you completely fall asleep in his arms. He struggles to unwrap himself from your hold, but when he finally succeeds, he tucks you in and kisses your cheek a few times before getting up to clean up after the mess you both created. 
He’s light on his feet, bringing a warm towel to your slick folds and wipes as best he can, being gentle so you could continue to enjoy your sleep. Even like this, you look so beautiful and Yoongi is an extremely lucky man. 
Yoongi makes sure to also pick up the lamp he dropped from earlier as well. He blows out a breath of relief when he notices that the damage is nothing big and nothing that can’t be fixed. He’ll make sure to fix that as soon as he can. 
While he’s out there, Yoongi places the tulips into a vase and fills it with water, placing it near a window where it could grow and blossom beautifully near the sunlight. He even cuts the tips into slants because he had heard somewhere online they last longer that way, making sure to get rid of any dead leaves and petals. Yoongi couldn’t be happier.
After he’s done with the light cleaning, he washes his hands and feels the exhaustion hit him tenfold. He’s careful when placing himself back in bed, lifting your arm and placing himself underneath you. The man smiles when he feels you curl yourself around him, sleeping soundlessly. 
“I love you.” He whispers and even though you don’t say it back Yoongi feels it with the way you melt into his arms. Yoongi falls asleep easily that night. 
“Baby.” Yoongi hears someone call him and he ignores it. Sleep calls his name louder and he doesn’t feel like waking up right now so he groans and cuddles deeper into the bedsheets below him, unaware of the life around him. 
“Baby wake up.” You keep calling sweetly and it’s tempting but he persists.
“No. Don’t wanna.” Yoongi grumbles like an old man and you can’t help but to laugh. “Just ten more minutes.”
When you woke up the next morning, you were so thankful Yoongi had kept his promise. Your apartment was flawless and you were as clean as you could be. The tulips looked prettier today as the sun shined on the delicate petals. You even had time to warm the seaweed soup he brought from home and you couldn’t wait to get a taste. The smell alone is delicious and it warmed your home up nicely, you truly couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that this was no longer a dream but your reality. You could definitely get used to this. 
You drop kisses onto his warm cheeks until his eyes flutter open, almost similar to a cat. “There you are.”
Yoongi pulls you into his arms again with quiet noncoherent grumbles and closes his eyes once more. “Give me ten minutes.”
“It’s already been ten.” You whisper lightly laughing. 
“Oh. Ten more then.” You get comfortable on his chest and cuddle for a bit longer because you can’t say no to his cute sleepy self. 
Yoongi starts to sniff the air with curiosity. “Is that the seaweed soup I brought you?” 
“Mhm.” You hum. “Better get up soon before it burns.” 
That manages to be convincing enough and Yoongi forces himself up, with you in his embrace. 
“Wanna wake up like that forever.” He says, voice filled with sleep. 
“You can.” 
Yoongi snaps his heavy eyes towards you. “Are you–”
“Move in with me, Yoongi.” Yes, you skipped every step to this, but nothing was ever to code between you and Yoongi. One thing you were so sure of and that was spending the rest of your life with him. “Please.”
“I- yes, of course.” Yoongi wraps his arms around you for a tight hug, kissing your temple. “I love you. I love you and I’ll prove it to you every single day.” 
“I know, I love you too. I love you.” Those three words come out from your mouths so easily and it’s nice that you no longer have to ever hold back. The man of your dreams is in the palms of your humble home and he’s in love with you. This was better than any dream. 
“Let’s eat?” He says after some time of hugging and kisses being interchanged. 
You nod, letting him take you there. Your kitchen is filled with the cruel aroma of food and your tummy rumbles as you sit comfortably while you wait for him to serve you a bowl of the warm tasty soup. 
“I should be doing that. I’m a terrible host.” Yoongi shakes his head while smiling, the fluff of hair moving with him, then your phone dings. “Hold on, give me a second.” 
Your heart drops when you see it is a Tinder notification from a man you promised to get back to. You look over to find Yoongi serving your bowl, making his way to the table. He leans in puckering slightly and you immediately lean into the sweet sudden kiss while he places your meal in front of you. This Yoongi is new because it wasn’t often you could act domestically towards one another, however this was perfect and just what you needed. 
“Everything okay baby?” Yoongi asks while caressing your soft cheek and you immediately nod in his palm. 
“Yes, everything’s perfect.” You reply in awe. “Thank you Yoongi, for everything.”
For letting me love you and for loving me back. 
The older man just smiles and joins you for the meal. 
It turns out you didn’t need Tinder after all. 
You quickly delete the app off your phone and start to eat with the love of your life, conversation flows while you enjoy each other’s presence and fall deeper in love. 
Alike Yoongi, you couldn’t imagine it happening any other way. You were bound to fall in love, one way or another, but that man was meant to be yours as you were meant to be his.
394 notes · View notes
lokideservesahug · 7 months ago
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Obsessed In Love
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Pairing: Yandere!Checo Pérez x gn!reader
(Slight) Yuki Tsunoda x reader
Warnings: Yandre, obsession, dark themes ofc (all kinda subtle). Badly translated Spanish
Request: Could you do yandere! Checo Perez with male reader? 👀
Notes: I'm not quite sure how to approach male readers just yet so I tried to do a gn reader instead. Pls let me know if you want something different though. This is the first time I've tried tow rite anything like this so feedback is greatly appreciated. Also if anyone wants a second part then pls let me know
Summary: You were very happy with your job- personal assistant for Sergio Pérez. Yet unbeknownst to you, being Checo's personal assistant isn't enough for him.
Part 2
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You hadn't been at Red Bull Racing for long but from what you've experienced so far, it has been amazing. You came in at the start of the 2024 season as Sergio Pérez's personal assistant and its just great. All of the crew were lively and welcoming to you, especially Checo. You've been following F1 for a long time now (hence how you found out about the hardly advertised job opening) and have always admired Checo and his racecraft so it was a huge honour to work alongside him. Unsurprisingly, media days are the least strenuous for the drivers but the most difficult for the PR/media team and as someone who worked under the former but worked directly alongside a driver, you had a nice balance of stress.
You scan your paddock pass and at the familiar beeps, you start your trek to Red Bull hospitality. You decided to arrive here early today so you can get a head start on the weekend and so you can even hang around with those you don't often get time to, like the engineers etc. You walk over to your workspace and get our your ipad with the schedule for today. Looks like you'll be following Checo around from 10-12 whilst he does miscellaneous activities and jobs first thing. You check the clock next to you. 8:35. You still have a good hour and a quarter until you need to start worrying about your 'boss' coming in.
You dive into your work and begin checking emails and planning entirely for the next few races. You're engrossed in your work for what feels like hours when you hear a gentle knock on the door. "Come in." You say, whilst placing the ipad on the desk and standing up. "Oh! Checo, I must have lost track of time." You glance at the clock. 8:57. Oh, that's odd. "Good morning cariño" You smile at his warm greeting. "Morning Checo, it isn't like you to be this early. What's the occasion?" For a split second you could have sworn that he looked like he was about to protest your words but swiftly caught himself.
"I uh- just thought I'd get an early start." He gave you a half smile and you smiled at his words. "Well Mr early start, I don't think there's much to do. You'd probably be most helpful speaking to some mechanics about any further adjustments but aside from that. But you can do anything I suppose" You turn to look at him after you finish your pacing only to find him sat down on a seat in the corner of your 'office'. You go to ask him what he's doing but he leans backspace, crosses his legs and speaks before you can get any words out. The corner of his lips turn up at the tilt of his head. "What? I thought you said I could do anything?" His half sarcastic response leaves you speechless. "You won't even know I'm here querida. Unless you ask for help which I'll be happy to give." You feel your cheeks warm slightly at his words and sit down at your desk and continue as you were when he came in.
☆-☆-☆-☆-☆
Checo was really quite helpful and by the time you had finished all you planned for the morning and much more, it was 10 o'clock.
You tidy up the miscellaneous work that manged to scatter across your desk and turn to the Mexican stood to your side. "Thank you for your help." He smiles at your words and looks at the clock behind you. "No worry querida. Any time" You feel yourself blush slightly at his words and so you look down and step away from the desk. You point out the time and ask if you should begin your duties. "You go ahead cariño, I just need to do something." Not thinking much of his words (and assuming he probably had to tie his shoe laces or send a text) you leave the door, parting with a soft "See you in the foyer in a minute."
You sit down on a plush leather sofa by the door waiting for Sergio's return to do your first job of the day. Suddenly, the door quietly opens and you hear the distant shouts of fans and the ever moving ambience of a Formula 1 race track. You turn to look at the door, already knowing who the disruptor of your momentary peace is. "Morning Max." The Dutch man nods at you and walks in your direction to place a clearly empty red bull can in the bin.
He sits down to your left and stretches out. "So, what media duties do you have today?" Max hums in thought and furrows his brows at your question. "Uhm- I think I have to film one of those what's in the box videos and then some looking at the car, meeting a few fans and then the video with Checo at the end of the day." You hum in acknowledgement at Max's words. The Red Bull YouTube video at the end of the day should be quite nice. Unsurprisingly, it features him and Checo but also Daniel and Yuki. You continue chatting, waiting for Checo until the Mexican comes through the door. You stand to greet Checo and begin walking out if the door to begin your day. He smiles at your greetings and unbeknownst to you, gives Max a harsh glare at the proximity of the two of you when he first entered.
☆-☆-☆-☆-☆
The day seemed to breeze by and by the time it came to the last media duty, you were shocked at how late it already was. You stand to the side under a canopy, watching as the RB (both Red Bull and VCARB) drivers mess around with each other. The sight of Checo and Max having a small, futile squabble over who gets to drive however, makes you laugh softly. You turn to look at the other drivers as Checo (not that you know) turns to give you a longing glance for the millionth time today. The cameraman calls for a small break before the next segment if the video will be filmed and the drivers all let out a collective sigh of relief.
You walk to the corner of the gazebo and fetch a chilled red bull from the cooler box for Checo. You wait at the edge of the canopy, still in the shade, for Checo to give the now slightly warmer drink to him. However instead if the regular presence of a certain Pérez to your side, you instead find a short Japanese man. "Hi Yuki." The pilot grins at your words and waves slightly. "Hello Y/N, how are you today?" You continue to exchange pleasantries with the man ; you've become more acquainted recently due to him often approaching you and staying for long chats.
"So how is tha-" Yuki doenst get to finish that thought as a gruff sounding Checo cuts across him, saying your name. You turn to him and give him a small smile whilst sticking your red bull filled hand out. "Sorry it's slightly warm, I got it out a little bit ago when you stopped filming." You look from the thawed ice in the shape of your fingers to Checo's face only to find his lips pulled together in a tight line and was he glaring at something? Before you can ask what's wrong, he meets your eyes and his gaze softens.
"Thank you querida." The cameraman calls to the drivers to return to in front of the lens. Checo lingers for as long as he can at your side until you have to jokingly nudge him in the direction of the camera before he leaves with a breathy laugh.
☆-☆-☆-☆-☆
Despite your early arrival, you get back to your office fairly late. You're one of the last people left in the red bull hospitality (aside from a few mechanics of course but they are just all superhuman). You just want to get home and collapse in your bed by the time you push your office door open but fortunately, you know that you just need to grab a few things and you'll be done for the day.
You place the ipad in the overnight charging dock (a clever little timed thing as to not waste excess energy) and grab your handbag from the floor where it lies. But your gaze catches on a red bull in the middle of the desk. Now it's not surprising in the slightest to see cans everywhere when you work for the big Asutrain company. However, this can is unlike one you've ever seen before. It's almost, glittery? You're curious as to what it is and of course where it came from.
Yet you chalk it up to it maybe being a very nice staff member or maybe even someone that has noticed you in the paddock (a certain Japanese man comes to mind before your mind shoos that away). However, you decide to try a bit of the drink. Heck you'll need at least some caffeine to make it home. You hear the ever satisfying crunch of the ring pull and when you put it to your lips it tastes divine. You almost moan at the sensation of a rich, almost Berry like taste, unlike anything you've ever tried before. You feel like you need to sit down to fully appreciate the flavour.
Wait. No. You feel like you need to sit down regardless. You feel a slight pressure in your head that you convince yourself that you're just imagining. You take another sip of the drink to try and subside the feeling. You place the half full can on your desk and go to walk rewards the door. But the door begins to look slightly fuzzy. Before you even try to make sense of what's happening, you suddenly feel yourself begin to grow weightless and fall backward.
You expect to hear a thump and be met with the hard, carpeted floor. However, you instead find yourself met with something warm and soft. Your mind , which is growing ever hazier, tries to make your head look up but you find yourself frozen, unable to move. At your attempts at mobility your hear a quiet "shhh." You groan in response trying to understand who the person (cradling you?) Is. "Shhh querida. You're safe with me. Just relax." And that's all it takes for you to drift into unconsciousness.
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Please let me know if anyone would be interested in a second part!
Thank you for reading. As always, likes, reblogs and especially feedback is always welcome.
Taglist (irdk if this is anyone's thing so sorry if it's not). @nikfigueiredo @mysoulispainted @leclercings @d3kstar @hiireadstuff @a-beaverhausen @nichmeddar @lozzamez3 @stinkyjax @marymustdie @littlesatanicassholebitch @mehrmonga @insanedeathwish @ems-alexandra @a-disturbing-self-reflection @cherry-piee @minkyungseokie
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hammed-burger08 · 24 days ago
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| Selcouth | Chapter three: Dread |
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Platonic! Yandere! Alien x reader
Warnings: Yandere behavior, violence, death
Summary: While recovering a space capsule your astronaut team discovers an intelligent life form that seems to be a little too attached to you.
Word count: 1,975
Chapters: | one | two | three | four |
A/n: thank you guys for all the support! I hope you enjoy this chapter. Also let me know if you want to see some of the drawings I've made of Gabriel! Thank you for reading <3
~
Waking up, you deeply stretch your limbs. With a yawn, you get up and get ready for the day. Walking into the common room, you first notice that David isn't there—weird, David is usually the first one up and eating breakfast. Shrugging, you walk toward the capsule.
The first thing you notice is that the door is wide open. Alarm bells go off in your head. You are 100% sure that you locked the door the last time you were in there; you even triple-checked the door just to make sure. With a shaky step, you make your way into the capsule.
Gabriel isn't in the enclosure.
You feel your heart rate quicken as you glance around the room.
Gabriel isn't in the room.
You feel your breathing quicken as you start panicking an insurmountable amount of dread consumes you. There is a carnivorous alien that can hypnotize people loose on the ship.
As quickly as you can, you run out of the capsule to go find either David or Isla.
After a brief search, you find David staring at a wall in the pilot's quarters his back turned toward you.
"David, it's gone!"
"What do I do?" you ask, still not getting a response from him. David is just sitting there completely motionless.
"Hello?" you call out, walking closer to David.
"David, I'm about to start really freaking out. Please say something!" You can feel your chest tighten every passing second that David doesn’t answer.
"David?" you ask. It is very out of character for David to be quiet on a regular day, so it's even weirder for him to be quiet while you're asking him questions.
"Are you okay?" You start to feel extremely concerned.
"My apologies… (Y/n), I feel fine," David says, finally turning to look at you. You flinch at his use of your name. Within the year that you have known him, you have only ever heard him use your name once. However, just hearing his voice clams you down.
"Um, okay. What do you think we should do though?" you ask, deciding it's better to focus on how Gabriel is gone rather than David's strange behavior.
"What should we do about what?"
"What we should do about Gabriel being loose on the ship—did you not hear anything I was saying?" you say, scoffing. Realizing that what you said was probably mean, you quickly apologize.
"Sorry, that came out rude," you say, looking at your feet.
"It's quite alright, (Y/n). I do suppose that I was not listening. Although, I do ask that you do not speak to me in such a way." First off, odd language. You don't ever recall David saying anything like that to you before, much less in that way. Second off, you have definitely said worse stuff to him before, and he has never responded like that.
"Nevertheless, I do suppose that we attempt to find Gabriel. Who knows what he might be doing as of now," David says, standing up and walking towards the door. Nodding your head, you follow him.
"Okay… but we should probably find Isla first."
Both you and David walk out of the pilot's quarters to the opposite side of the station. You find Isla in her workplace fixing something.
"Hey Isla—" you start to say, attempting to greet her.
"What do you want?" Isla rudely questions, interrupting you.
"Oh, well I guess I'll just go fuck myself then." You say grinding your teeth. You have been so stressed out ever since you woke up, so if she was going to treat you like this, then you weren't going to entertain her.
"Isla dearest, something has happened in the ship. The creature is out of its cage." Seeing that you were done talking to Isla, David began to explain what happened.
Isla turns to you, her face curled up in an ugly snarl.
"What?! How could you let this happen, you incompetent little shit!" Isla screams at you.
"I locked the capsule last night—hell—I even checked the cameras before I left! I have no idea how Gabriel got out!" you say. Even if you don't want to entertain her, you still want to defend yourself.
"Well, that thing is out now, so go fix your problem before I have to do something!" Isla says, getting closer to your face.
"Dude, it could literally be anywhere in this station. Could you please just help us find it?" you say, asking her for even the tiniest bit of help.
"No, this is your freaky little science experiment. You go find it on your own." Isla says while shoving you. She has a fair point, but still, since it is out of the capsule, it's now everyone's problem.
"You literally know the layout of this place better than anyone else. Can you *please* just help us or at least contact the nearest space station?" Even if you don't like Isla, you do have to admit that she is extremely knowledgeable.
"Contacting the space station will do little to help us in this situation, I presume, and if Isla is so set on not helping, then we should not make her," David says, butting into the conversation in hopes of ending it.
"But—" you begin, trying to argue.
"Let us leave her be," David says, grabbing your arm and walking away. You don't move and instead try to pry his hand off your arm.
"Come along now, (Y/n). We have much work to do." David moves his hand from your arm and instead wraps his arm around your shoulder, leading you away from a glaring Isla.
Once in the hallway, you begin to air out your frustration to David.
"She's such a bitch! How can she be so bitter?" You cannot wrap your head around Isla's attitude even if you tried.
"I don't understand how she could be so mean when I've literally done nothing to her. And the fact that she won't help, I just—" you say, working yourself up again.
"(Y/n) dear, please calm down. Being frustrated will not help us do the task at hand," David says, seeing your agitation.
"I've been meaning to ask you, why are you talking like that?" Now that you and he are finally alone, you question his odd choice of words.
"Like what, dear?"
"I don't know, like really proper, I guess."
"Would it not be more prudent for us to concentrate on securing the space station rather than discussing my choice of words?" It feels like he busted out a dictionary to say that sentence.
"Uh—okay. Well, um, what side do you want to take first?"
"I will take the right side of the station. I would rather not have you around Isla for the time being."
"Okay, please tell me if you see Gabriel anywhere though." You and David walk your opposite ways.
The White Sparrow, your space station, is made up of 11 different sections which can be split up into either the right side or the left side. On the right, there is the technician's room, storage, security, cargo, and command. In the dead center is the common room which holds the escape pods. To the left are the pilot's quarters, research facility, viewing deck, medical facility, and the capsule.
After walking through each room and locking every door and setting the alarms, you make your way over to where David is.
"Is everything on lockdown?" you ask.
"Yes." You and David begin walking.
"Great, are you in the mood to see Isla one more time before bed? Because I know I'm not." You have to let Isla know that each of the doors has an alarm on them, so she can put her passcode in.
"I believe that the conversation you are about to have with her will likely be considerably less distressing than the one that occurred earlier," David says in what you think is an attempt to cheer you up.
"What makes you think that? Because she makes me want to rip my hair out whenever I speak to her," you say, giving a chuckle after.
"I may have had a little chat with her while I was locking the station." That's definitely not concerning at all! You look over at David's face.
"Oh my god, what did you say to her?" you ask, hoping that David didn't just embarrass you.
"Nothing much," David says, shrugging.
You and David are now right in front of where Isla is. With a deep breath in, you put your passcode in and open the door.
"Hey Isla," you say in a not-so-cheery tone.
"Hey, David, can you please leave for a second? I want to discuss a few things with (Y/n)." Before anything else even leaves her mouth, you know whatever she has to say to you next is gonna be some bullshit.
"Sure," David answers, walking out the door and shutting it.
"You fucking whore—" You genuinely are taken aback by that.
"Whoa, where did that come from?" you ask, legitimately shocked.
"You know exactly where it's coming from. First, you act all buddy-buddy with David, then you come in here acting like you did nothing wrong. As if you didn't tell him to say that to me.
"What are you talking about? I don't even know what he said?"
"You're pathetic. You knew since we were training together that I liked David, yet you still went after him. No wonder your ex killed himself. You probably tried cheating on him, you attention whore." About a year ago, you and Isla trained together in some sort of astronaut camp. There, you guys were inseparable, constantly doing things together. She was your best friend, so you trusted her, and one day you vented to her about what happened in your past.
That turned out to be a huge mistake. One day she told you about her crush, David. So, you being the good friend you were, attempted to be a matchmaker. Long story short, you got David to talk to Isla, and Isla got the wrong idea and somehow thought you were trying to 'steal her crush away'. So, she told David that your ex killed themselves and that you were cursed and that if he loved you, then he would die too. She then stopped talking to you and treated you like shit, all over a misconception.
"What...? Is that really the reason you have been treating me so poorly? Well, newsflash: I never liked David. I've never seen him as more than a friend, so for you to say that, for you to bring up my ex..." you say, your breathing quickening and tears welling up in your eyes.
"How could you...?" you ask, taking a shaky step back.
"Forget this, I'm leaving. I'll go contact the station myself." Turning away from her, you hold yourself, rushing out of the room. At this point, you are now full-on sobbing.
"Oh dear, what happened?" David asks, seeing that you were in extreme distress.
"She—! She..." you try to get out. Your heart felt like it was beating out of your chest; you were hyperventilating. Your throat felt so tight as if someone was trying to strangle you.
"You need to calm down. (Y/n) dear, please look me in the eye." Just barely hearing him, you look David in the eye. Even with your vision all blurry, you could see the white glow coming from his eyes. You've seen this glow before.
"Gabriel...?" you feel your head get extremely fuzzy and you pass out.
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o3o-aya · 7 months ago
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Part three of demon slayer reader infiltrating Douma's cult. MOMMY PLEASEEEEEE 🥺, feed the readers, feed me 🤲 aaaaaaaaaa. Also please take you're time, don't stress yourself, and make sure to take care of yourself. 😠❤️
I NEED TO KNOW HOW DOUMA TREATS READER DURING HER PREGNANCY and also how he reacts to her giving birth and almost dying bc ~demon baby~ yk? I feel like he would maybe turn her into a demon but like what if it's a close call and she's like .0001% alive at this point bc that baby probably gonna be a menace.
yith :)
TW- blood, childbirth, nsfw
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As your unwelcomed pregnancy progressed, Douma just became more and more unbearable!
You couldn't stand how he was around you more!
You couldn't even take a walk without him bugging you!
Sighing as you placed your hand on your stomach before you looked down at the lotus flowers, they were lovely this year...
The same couldn't be said for him...
"Aren't they pretty y/n-chan?!~" He cooed at you before he paused as you looked away from him.
"Aw don't be rude to me...~" He pouted at you, grabbing your jaw as he turned your head to look at him.
"We should think of names to call the baby!" Douma cried out with a wide smile.
"Isn't your so called master going to eat it...?" You grumbled out as you looked at him, you had no choice to look at him after all...
Your eyes widened as his sharp nails dug into your flesh, feeling the blood drip down your cheeks.
"Now now my flower... This is an experiment... We get to keep this one..." Douma said, a smile still on his face.
"So shut up about that." He said before he let you drop to the floor.
You winced as you looked up at him, panting softly.
"Someone clean her up." He waved to a servant before he walked away.
You had to get out here...
~~~
Watching as the cult member rubbed your ankles, you turned away in slight annoyance before you sighed.
"Unhappy my flower?" Douma cooed as he placed his hand on your stomach, rubbing it gently.
"Ah! You're hungry! You need to eat so our child can be healthy..." He said as he snapped his fingers at someone to bring you food.
As the meats and rice were placed in front of you, you went to reach for them...
Douma snatched it away. "Say ahhh! You can't strain yourself now! You're with child!" He said happily as he tilted his head.
You didn't know how much longer you could stay...
He did have an uppermoon meeting coming up...
~~~
"Now now my flower... You shouldn't move to much now." Douma said as he sat you down on the beanbag looking thing...
"Just sit here and rest... Someone will bring you tea." He said to you as he smiled.
"I'll be back shortly..." He said as he walked out of the room.
You sighed as you drifted your eyes before you looked away, looking back up as the servant walked in, placing down the tea before leaving.
You looked at it as your eyes narrowed, something felt...
Off...
No mind...
You slowly picked up the cup as your took a sip, drinking it before you stood up and went to grab your stuff to escape.
~~~
Your escape attempt were foiled...
Foiled by what?
Your sudden labor pains...
You never expected this... You were a month early...
You weren't due for another month!
And Douma was at an uppermoon meeting... Your screams echoing the halls of the temple..
Squeezing the hands of one of the midwives as you pushed.
It was hours... You didn't know how long...
Until you heard the midwife...
"It's a boy!" She cried before handing you the crying baby...
You looked at him through your hazy gaze... The baby handed to you...
He was so little... So defenseless...
"So we have a son!" Douma said as he entered the room, a smile wide on his face.
Coming to your side as he kneeled down.
"Maybe next time you won't plan to leave my flower...~" He cooed in your ear as your eyes widened.
"Then maybe I won't slip that root in your tea..."
~~~ The weeks passed...
Your son grew... Well, just a little.. As much as newborns could...
Letting out soft whimpers as Douma sucked on your nipples, his hips slapping against yours.
"It's been so long...~" Douma cooed as he thrusted into you.
"But your body remembers who it belongs you...~" He smirked as he moved and pressed a kiss to your neck.
Your body reacting to his every touch...
You hated it....
~~~
Staring down at your baby boy... Hiroshi...
Narrowing your eyes at him as you gripped the side of the cradle, he looked like you...
Yet he had that monster's eyes...
You brought the dagger up as you looked at him.
You were going to do it...
Yet you paused, watching as Hiroshi reached up to you with a smile.. Dropping your dagger as you fell to your knees.
"I'll never get out of here..."
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knoxic · 1 year ago
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A kiss may ruin a human life.
Oscar Wilde
-Masterlist- part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4
wc: 2,1k
warnings: miscommunications (but really there's almost no communication at all), self deprecating thoughts, mentions of death, ptsd, insomnia, anxiety, grief(?), angst,
i think that's it but please let me know if there's anything else!
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a/n: this work implies that Hotch heard Haley's last breath. timeline is around season 6-7 but it doesn't really matter. this is heavily based on my own experience from death and hearing someone's last breath. Hotch is a little out of character but it'll get better i promise, this was supposed to be something just for myself but i decided to post it, that being said, im already writing part 2!
no use of y/n!
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He was distant. 
He kept avoiding you, every day, even when you got back to the hotel and had no other choice but to be around each other, he showered and said some casual phrases that could damn well be said to a stranger.
You tried to understand, he was stressed and haven't slept well in days but, fuck, wasn't it happening to everyone else? And they weren't avoiding you...
Asking if he wanted something to eat or if he wanted that shitty coffee just got you a cold and empty answer. "No, thanks.", "I've had enough for today, thank you.", "I'll just finish some files," and etc. Sure he was polite, you don't think Hotch could be rude even if he wanted to, at least not with someone he was close to, but he was always so gentle and warm, had you done something to make him mad?
It started off just as every other day started, a new case in a city you've never been to before. Sharing a room with your boss meant a different routine than if you shared with anyone else in the team, late nights and early mornings, the sound of pen scratching paper being the first thing you heard when waking up and the last when you were drifting off, you wondered if he even slept at all.
The answer was no, he barely ever slept during a case, especially if he could hear you breathing all night. 
He was scared, scared it would happen again. It was unrealistic and he knew, it happened too many times already, but twice like that was terrifying.
Terrifying to the point he was paralyzed, every night you whispered that sweet "Good night, Hotch." and it flipped the switch, he would now spend the night awake to make sure that you would tell him "Good morning, Hotch" in a gentle yet strong voice. That whisper sounded enough like the gasp he heard that one time, and it always immediately set off every trigger he had of that unfortunate day.
Every night he spent with you in the same room he tried to distract himself enough not to hear your steady breaths, finishing random files that weren't so important and sometimes even going as far as writing them twice. When he got tired enough to pass out, he would lie down and hope that the second his head hit the uncomfortable pillow he would be asleep. 
It never happened.
He kept listening. You sometimes tossed and turned in your sleep, and he knew it meant you were probably having nightmares but it always soothed his mind. If you were moving it meant you were still alive, and the rustling of the sheets downed out the agonizing sound of your breath.
Sometimes he slept, but even when he did, he kept listening, gunshots echoed inside his head, his aching hands clad with blood holding her body, the sound... the horrific, terrifying, agonizing sound of her last breath.
He thought it had stopped, he has triggers of course but, it wasn't always that they were set off like this, usually it happened sometimes when Jack slept on his chest and that meant carrying him to bed, but he normally allowed himself a bit of self care and went to his own room, close enough from his child to hear if he called but far enough to not hear his steady breaths. Being stuck in a hotel room did not allow him that. He tried soundproof headphones after the second night they spent together a couple years ago, he quickly figured it was somehow more agonizing than being able to hear.
Now three days into the case, he was desperate for a night alone, to drown in complete silence and darkness. Thankfully, yet not what he wanted, you had gone to Emily's room to discuss something, he didn't know what it was and apparently you didn't care enough to tell him, or you just didn't want him to know.
He held himself from sprinting to bed right after you left the room, surely it wouldn't look so good if you were to come back because you forgot something or for any other reason, he let a couple minutes pass by, anxiously so, before he got up to take the fastest shower he could manage and jumped into bed, he almost decided against clothes before reminding himself that sooner or later you would come back. It took more time than he'd like but finally he was drifting off, quicker than expected.
"Emily..." you whimpered.
"Come on... it's Hotch," she rested a hand on your shoulder, "he's probably just going through something. I heard him tell Rossi last week that Jack was having some troubles in school, it might be that, right?"
"Yeah, but I feel like..." Emily was the only one who knew about your confusing feelings for Hotch and still you hesitated, "I feel like it's something else... he's been avoiding me and rarely looks me in the eye when we talk."
Emily went silent for a few seconds, looking away and seemed to be deciding carefully what to say.
"Listen, you know I love you and support anything you do, but..." oh God "You should talk to him, not me."
"I came to you exactly because I don't want to talk to him, even if I tried I don't think he would answer." You gave her the most pleading puppy eyes you could manage. 
"There's only one way to find out, honey."
After a few more minutes of licking your wounds you gathered yourself enough to face Aaron, walking a little too fast to your shared room just to make sure you wouldn't have time to back down and run back to Emily. Thinking too many things and nothing at all just to distract yourself you ended up opening the door loudly, scaring yourself when the lights were off and you could barely make out the person under the blankets.
Did you really just open a random door? Fuck! 
In your panic state your eyes caught a glimpse of Aaron's bag close to his bed, some files slipped out from it when he drastically dropped it earlier. Without realizing, you slipped into the room and closed the door quieter than you had opened it, unsure if Aaron was indeed asleep or if he was pretending just so he wouldn't have to talk to you, a shower seemed to be the best thing to do.
It was weird, a part of you knew he was tired, and going to sleep without someone else in the room is sometimes a lot easier, but, the bigger part of you kept thinking that he was doing this just to avoid you, to not have to force out a "Good night." when both of you knew it wasn't good for him, and it hurt.
Shower was indeed a good thing, the warm water doing wonders to your aching muscles and the sound of the water running was a good background for your mind to organize your thoughts. That same sound was what Aaron woke up to.
Looking around searching for what had woken him, he saw the light coming from the bathroom, the door didn't close all the way sometimes, you had to close it hard and he supposed you didn't want to make noise. He searched for his phone to check the time, see how long it took you to come back, but in his hustle earlier he had forgotten to pick up his phone, wherever it was he didn't feel like getting up to search for it.
In his sleepy state he had turned to watch the door, not really paying attention to what he was looking out for until he got a glimpse of you wrapping a towel around your body, he hadn't even that noticed the sound of the water had stopped, snapping himself out of whatever this was he turned away from the door, right before he saw the light getting brighter and your quiet barefoot steps getting closer, a zipper being opened, rustle of fabric and the zipper being closed, steps again but this time going away and the room getting darker again.
It didn't take long for you to come back, he could smell the soap you always used, it only took him a couple days sharing a room and a bathroom with you to know that every soap and perfume you used smelled mostly the same.
It almost physically pained him to not be able to smell it directly from your skin, he had hugged you and stood close enough to smell your perfume he knew it wasn't the same as your fresh out of the shower scent. It already smelled so comforting from this far, he was certain he'd go insane if he ever got the chance to hug you like this, out of any police department or hospital smell, just you. 
He was so lost in thought he hadn't realized you had already settled in bed.
"Good night, Hotch..." he heard you whisper, so quietly he almost missed it, it made his heart stutter and beat faster.
Did you know he was awake? Did you see him looking at you through the open door? He didn't see anything but the skin of your arms! Should he answer? No. Stop it, idiot.
You turned again, again and again. The mattress was hard, the blanket kept scratching your bare legs, the pillow made you feel like a stone would be comfier, not to mention the discomfort of having your mind tell you how uncomfortable Aaron must be that he even went to bed earlier just so he wouldn't have to see you. You must be so pathetic to even have wished him a good night when he clearly didn't want you here–
"Are you okay?" There it was, his husky voice, he was sleeping and you disturbed him. 
"Uh–yeah, sorry to wake you up." Wow, that came out so weak, he definitely thinks you're pathetic.
The sound of his body turning and his voice right beside your ear made you shiver. 
"You keep tossing and turning, your breath is faster than normal," he sighed. "So I'll ask again, are you okay?" It's now or never.
"Have you–you've been avoiding me." You could hear Emily's voice saying it wasn't so hard was it?
"No I haven't." That came out way too fast to be true, Hotchner.
"Yes you have, and you can barely even look at me when we're alone, you give me empty words and talk better to a rookie you'll never see again," you were rambling but now there was no way you would stop. "If I did something to upset you, please tell me. Because, I can profile you but I cannot read your mind yet, and I can't apologize if I don't know what I did wrong." 
"I-" God, you were so self deprecating. "I'm sorry I made you feel that way, you did nothing wrong." He spoke in a weirdly soft voice.
"That–that doesn't make me feel better..."
"I'm sorry... it's... not something you did..." Well, if you were talking then he should too, "It's you."
A couple seconds passed, they felt like minutes.
Your heart dropped, "What?" It couldn't be... you knew you weren't perfect but, to know your mind was right yet again felt... nauseous.
"Wait! wait," he was sitting up now, back to the headboard, making a calm down gesture with his hands, he did that once with a child, to make them stop their rambling, you really were pathetic.
"Not you, I meant... Fuck, it's complicated."
Now that you were already broken, you might as well just finish this, end what made you anxious for once, even if it meant losing your hopes of being with him.
Your breath was harder and lost its rhythm. You could be going into a panic attack right now but Aaron was relieved, after hearing the way your voice got so... pained, he thought he ended this, that you would get up and leave him. The memories came back in a rush that made him dizzy, but you were still here, and breathing hard, unlike the breath Haley–
"Then tell me, unless you have something else to do at 2am. I think we have enough time, tell me. Whatever it is, I'm sure it's not as complicated as what we had going on." Your voice was steady, no longer panicked and embarrassed like someone who just got rejected by their crush, that was the voice of a person who took down serial killers for a living, who could damn well talk face to face with him if they were to fight. Now he felt small, he could tower over you if you two were standing up but he knew you were the bigger person.
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lucky-lucky-duck · 3 months ago
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Forget You, Forget-Me-Not
A continuation based on a reply to my Vaga Snapshot post that i'm writing between cram sessions. The semester ends in 2 days and I'm dying, but it's fine. c: Everything is fine. c: I'm gonna start on the matchup in a couple days when my load lightens, this is just a late night creative outlet for stress c':
Leo Kurosagi x Vagastrom Ghoul Reader (2nd person pov and gender neutral)
Leo goes too far in an argument, and I'll fill this out tomorrow. For now, it's sad. Reader nearly gives up on braking the curse causing the people around them to slowly forget they exist. Fuck I'm tired
Morning edit - I fixed a couple of spelling mistakes, but the description made me laugh so it stays. I'm still fucking tired.
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"I'm passing the phone to a No-Name NPC who is so unremarkable that the faculty evaluators actually forgot they existed."
You're ignoring him. It's been four days, and you've barely said a word to anyone, but everyone knows that Leo is somehow the culprit.
It doesn't really matter, you think with dull amusement. Sho and Alan had both been out at the time; the only witnesses to your humiliation were you, Leo, and the general students. Leo's too busy trying to bait you into argument to gloat about his win to the others, and you aren't about to tell them yourself.
The general students are a non-issue, too. Most of them struggle to remember your name most days, they're not about to suddenly start remembering gossip about you.
The thing is, you've had fights with Leo before. Hell, fighting with Leo has something of a hobby to you once you started sharing a living space with him. There's just something about him that brings out the worst in you. The vicious snake-like part, that coils up with anticipation and prepares to strike when you see Leo enter the room. You used to think of it as something that you both secretly look forward to, once the vitriol died down and your metaphorical fight-to-the-death turned into elementary-school bullying.
He's never brought up your curse like that before. It's been tit-for-tat, both of you giving just as good as you get. It's supposed to be fun.
You squash the pang of longing in your chest with snarled anger, only to be drenched in an icy kind of apathy. There are lines both of you choose not to cross these days (you were under that impression at the time, at least.), and the waning acknowledgment of your existence had definitely been one of them. Christ, you didn't exactly pour salt onto Leo's obvious abandonment wounds during these fights, did you?
"What did Leo do to you?" Sho's voice snaps you out of your thoughts.
"Nothing, why do you ask?" Your voice scrapes lifelessly as you meet his eyes with a small, strained grin.
"Really? Then what, you've been moping around the dorms the past few days because you enjoy the smell of sweat and motor oil?"
"You know me, can't get enough of the ol' sugar and spice." The attempted banner falls flat as you make to slip around him and head for your dorm at the end of the hall, only to be held in place with a single strong hand on your wrist. "You ever tried shake weights?"
"Stop," he shuts down your distraction. "You know he's a rat bastard, right? You can't take what he says personally. We're going to find a way to break the curse."
So, Leo told Sho what happened after all, has he?
Sho's words slow to a stop when he notices the dead-eyes and scowl that have overtaken your forceful nonchalance from earlier.
"I wasn't lying, I'm not angry at Leo for what he said to me," Apart from the fact that you kind of are. "He wasn't exactly wrong."
"Shut up already!" You don't turn your head to look at Leo as he appears in the corridor. Figures he would listen in on a private conversation. It's probably him who sent Sho to find you in the first place. Bastards.
In the end, the choice is made for you, and a new set of hands grip your shoulders, yanking you face-to-face with the person you wanted to see least.
"Are you telling me I've been wasting my time on someone this fucking pathetic?" The words would hurt more if the expression on Leo's face were less desperate. If anyone looks pathetic here, it's him. "Of course. You would be willing to sit back and watch as you sink into irrelevance, wouldn't you? If that's what you want, fine." It's funny how adept you've become at interpreting Leo's mannerisms after all of the fighting.
For all of the accusations and insults, the only thing you see in front of you is a hissing kitty cat desperately trying to make amends in the only way it knows how. It's a shit apology, but... Leo isn't the type to put on this type of fit unless he feels threatened and cornered, and, as far as you are aware, the only threat being posed at the moment is you walking away from him.
Your bar sure has sunk low these days, yikes.
"That would probably hurt more if you weren't still gripping my shoulders like we're in a steamy novel. Do you have fantasies of pinning me down often?" You're promptly shoved away and insulted once more, free to turn back and walk back toward your dorm without sparing either boy behind you a glance.
As you prepare yourself for bed, you notice the ache in your chest loosening just enough to let you breath deeply. If just for tonight, you'll fall asleep free from the fear that tomorrow will be the day you finally wake up as a stranger.
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sunwoniie · 5 months ago
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Figure it out
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Pairing: Ni-ki x reader
Synopsis: you're finding out that you're pregnant from your best friend.
Warnings: the reader is obviously pregnant
English is not my first language
n/a: this an old scenario that was written for a whole story but I'm too lazy to write so it's just that !
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"Are you done ?" Ni-ki said who was leaning against the toilet door with his arms crossed under his chest.
You two were in one of the school bathroom, the least used. It was only you two in this whole silent bathroom.
You decide to take a pregnancy test because of the obvious symptoms that you have. You didn't want it to do it alone since you have no friends and the only person that you have is Ni-ki and it's also because he's involved in it.
"Yeah." You said after you finished peeing on the stick and put it aside so you can put your panties and your shorts back on.
You didn't want to go out until the result is ready, don't want to face him while you waiting for the result. You close the toilet seat and sit on, while having the stick between your hands. You have to wait 5 min but it's feel like an hour.
You're right foot was tapping on the floor due to stress.
"Relax, y/n" you heard ni-ki's calm and soft voice.
"Shut it, riki, your not making things easier, this is still fucking stressful" you said, running your fingers through your hair.
Your heard silence, he didn't say anything else and just obeys you.
"I'm sorry," you started "i didn't mean to be harsh, i just feel horribly stress by this situation and by my finals"
"It's okay, I understand" Ni-ki said still using his soft voice. "Thank you for agreeing to come do this with me" you said, staring at Ni-ki shoes which is the only thing that is visible to you. "Why thanking me ? You're not alone in this situation, that's the least I can do"
You didn't say anything not knowing what to reply.
"what do you think we will do if you are pregnant?" He asks you take a moment of reflexion and said " i don't know, I will probably won't keep it or putting it in a orphan center until someone adopt it, I'm still young for that and I didn't even start my college studies."You said before marking a break .
"what about you?" "I don't know, it's your choice," he mark a break before he tells you "and I'll be by your side no matter what you choose"
You fluttered about what he said, you only cough "your choice is also important, i wasn't alone" "yeah but I'm not the one who's going to bear it during 9 months"
"True but are you really sure is that what you want ?" You ask but not hearing anything from him instead you hear beeps of the stick, letting you know that the result is ready.
You look at the stick, and feel like your  insides dropped as you swallow hard.
"What is it?" Ni-ki asked but earn not responding
You stood up and open the toilet door and you come out of the toilet.
"Chaewon?" He looks at you confused but mainly concerned about the look on your face a mix of shock and fear.
You passed by him, not looking at him you just walk to the bathroom counter and put your two hands at the end of the counter, the pregnancy test still in your hand. You put you head down trying not to cry, it's obviously a hard task.
Ni-ki approaches you, and looks at you, worried. At the sight of you face, he can tell that the result is not what you wanted. You slid the hand with the test on the counter towards Ni-ki and take your hand away from it. You still have your head low.
Ni-ki took the test, stands shocked as he tries to swallow but find it hard.
You lift your head up looking at Ni-ki, tears where all over you face, your nose was slightly red.
"What are we going to do ?" You cried out, you couldn't stop it.
Ni-ki immediately put the test on the counter and cup your cheeks.
"We're going to find a solution, I'm here with you, y/n" he said as he swipes your tears away.
"It's okay, let it out" he told you before take you in his arms, your face on his chest and his head on your head. He rubs you back back and forth slowly.
You still cry on his uniform but he couldn't careless.
"We're going to find out, don't worry"
Taglist: @y9jungone @peonywon @moon368
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scarletwinterxx · 5 months ago
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little flower - dad haechan scenario
hellloooo, it's a bit late for Haechan day but better late than never😊 a quick fluff moment with our fullsun and his lily girl. hope you like it!!
pt. 1 - Lee and Lily
pt. 2 - bigger that the whole sky
pt. 3 - lily and chocobi
if you have a request or scenario you want me to do, just send me a message I'll see what I can do😊💌
For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.
All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.
(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)
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Between you and your husband, he tends to be the one who overreact. Especially where you're concerned. You thought he's overprotective over you already but he managed to succeed himself when you found out you're expecting.
It doesn't bother you though, you're used to your golden retriever husband's antics. When he's home, he has to be in the same room as you. When he's at work he would text you or call when he's available to make sure you're okay at home.
You've been adviced by your doctor to avoid any stress and strenuous activities. You and Haechan had a long serious talk after that doctor's appointment, you both were working at that time and he didn't want to stop you living your life. But as your husband, he wants to make sure you and the baby is safe so he asked if you could stay at home just how the doctor adviced. You understand where he's coming from, so you agreed. You wanted your baby to be safe.
And now 39 weeks laters, you feel like you're as large as a balloon. Most of the times waddling around the house clad in your husband's clothes since that's the only thing that fits you at this point.
Haechan loves it. He loves watching you grow each week. To his eyes you are the most radiant woman he's ever laid his eyes on. And the fact that you're growing his baby just makes him fall even more in love with you.
Not a day passes by without him reminding you of how thankful he is of you and how much he loves you and your little human.
"She's being dramatic, like you" you tell him one night while he watches her little foot kick against the inside of your belly, revealing a tiny imprint on your tummy.
Haechan caresses your belly gently. his hand against your skin feeling her kicks from inside you. "Still can't believe she's in there, moving and all that"
"Soon she'll be here, kicking you too" you joke
"I would gladly be her own personal punching bag or kick board or whatever she needs me to be"
You smile at that, you just know he's going to be the best dad to her.
"You do that, i think my insides are done being her practice tools. I can feel her other foot against my lung"
"Does it hurt? What do you need? You need to sit up?"
"I'm okay, just a bit short of breath. She'll move around eventually, probably later she'll sit on my bladder again then I'd have to pee every freaking second again"
Haechan kisses your belly a few more times before sooching up the bed to lay against the headboard  beside you
"We have dinner at my parent's tomorrow, do you want to stay the night there or drive home after?"
It's his birthday tomorrow so his mom invited you over for dinner, since you're due any day now Haechan decided not to do anything grand. He didn't want you to get tired or stressed over planning his birthday.
"We can stay, won't it be too late if we drive back? You'll be tired bub"
"I'm good, it's just driving but sure if you want to stay the night. She won't come out tomorrow wouldn't she?" He jokes.
Your husband might as well have a foresight because the next day during dinner with his family, you started to feel your belly contract. At first you didn't think too much of it but as the night progressed, you're starting to think of the possibility you're having contractions right now.
For a while you didn't tell anyone, you didn't want to take the day away from Haechan. It's his day after all.
During dinner, just as Haechan's mom about to serve dessert you felt something warm. You look over at Haechan, grabbing his arm catching his attention
"Either I peed or my water just broke"
"What?"
"Yep, I think my water just broke"
"Y/N's water just broke" Haechan just said catching everyone's attention then everyone was on their feet. Haechan on your right while his mom stands on your left, guiding you to stand up
"Honey, can you get towels from the bathroom. And a change of clothes. I think your brother has some in his old room. Do you need anything else" his mom asks you calmly
"The stuff, I mean the baby's stuff" you tell her
"It's already packed but we left it at home. I only have the carseat right now" Haechan adds
"Your dad will go get everything, go to the hospital first. Do you want to come?" she asks you, her mother instincts kicking in. Right now all of the attention is on you.
"Will you?" you ask, she smiles warmly at you holding your arm tightly but in a comforting way "Of course, dear. Hyuck, go start the car"
The drive was less hectic, all thanks to Haechan's mom. She kept on telling you comforting words all the way to the hospital, you got settled in and now the waiting game begins.
You got there just in time, the doctor checked and asked if you wanted to get epidural which you said yes to. Your pain tolerance goes as high as 2. You cry whenever your headache gets too bad, you can't imagine delivering a baby all natural. Kudos to those who do but that's not you.
"You need anything?" Haechan asks, brushing the hair away from your face. Ever since you arrived here, he hasn't left your side. He only lets go of your hand when the doctor or nurses need to check on you
"Ice chips?"
"I'll go get more" Haechan's mom volunteers, walking out the room to get your request
"Sorry we can't finish your birthday dinner" you tell your husband
Haechan shakes his head, smiling down at you "This is better than any party. How cool would it be if she's born today? We'd have the same birthday"
"Your daughter isn't even here yet and she's already so much like you. Announcing her entrance to the world like this" you chuckled
Hearing the words 'your daughter' does something to him, like a blanket of warmth wrapping all over him. He hasn't even met her yet and he's already so so so in love with your baby girl.
"I can't wait to meet her, we'll have her here in a few hours"
"Are you excited?" you ask him
"Of course, I'm never putting her down. She's gonna stay in my arms forever"
"Silly"
"I'm not kidding. You got a headstart, I'm gonna make sure I'm her favorite" he says with a determined look on his face, you don't even try to argue back
"You're my favorite" you mumble
He just looks at you for a while, admiring you. He leans down, kissing you on the forehead. "I love you so so much. I know you're about to hate me once you start pushing but it's okay" he jokes
And he, once again, was right. You felt bad, cursing him out as you push his baby out of you while his mother heard every word. "It's okay, dear. Don't worry about it, I know how it feels"
"I don't really like you right now" you mumbled, taking a break from pushing
"You liked me enough to carry my baby" he replies
"Shut up"
A few more pushes before you hear her cries fill the room, the nurses lay her on your chest while Haechan stands right beside you
"Oh my gosh, she's here. She's so cute" you hear the nurses mumble, Haechan's mom capturing the moment from the sideline
Meanwhile Haechan stands frozen, looking at the little human in your arms
"What are you doing over there? Come here" you ask him, Haechan scoots closer, holding his pinky finger out to your baby girl which she holds with her tiny hands.
Haechan lets out a sob, not able to contain it.
"It's okay, she's the worth the tears Hyuck" you tell him. Your free hand caress his now tear stained cheeks
"Hey baby girl, happy birthday" he mumbles, still looking at her
"You wanna hold her?"
"I don't know how"
"Yeah well you gotta start learning, daddy. Here, hold her" you say, ever so carefully Haechan takes her from you. His mom stands behind him to take a peak
"She has your nose" she tells him
"She does, doesn't she" you say with a tired smile
"Hi baby, it's me. I'm your dad. You recognize my voice right? I sing to you every night and tell you stories" he tells her like she understands his words
After a few more minutes with her, a nurse takes her from Haechan to check up on her. He takes this time to check on you,
"She's perfect. Thank you" he tells you
"Thank me? You made her too" you joke, he smiles at you then kisses you sweetly
"Happy birthday, Donghyuck. What shall we name our little girl?"
"Nari, like the little Lily flower"
You smile at his explanation, "Your little flower, our little flower. I love it. Happy birthday Hyuck and Nari, I love you both so so much"
"Best birthday ever"
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magnoliahwrites · 9 months ago
Text
Lean On Me (Don’t Knock Me Over)
or: harry is a touring musician and you're here to interview him
feat: childhood friendship, flashbacks, friends to enemies to lovers,mention of panic attack/anxiety/puking
note: this is part one of a three-shot. Side note: I made up names for harry’s band, it’s an up and coming pop punk band so there’s that
Much like most things in life, when the paper slid through your desk, you immediately shoved it under the outgoing mail box.
anything that causes you stress immediately went there, a future problem for yourself.
It wasn't until the night before the show, when your manager turned best friend, Cindy sat in front of you tapping her new manicure on the desk in front of you that you even remembered it.
"I just don't see the big deal," she huffs, stopping the tapping of her nails long enough to push her blonde hair out of her eyes, "like, you two were kids. He probably doesn't even remember you. And besides, I have three people lined up who would literally kill you for this chance."
You groan, resisting the urge to fling your body on the floor and ahve a full body temper tantrum.
Instead, you act like an adult and throw a mini fit, throwing your head back and shoving the papers away from you.
"he'll remember me." you groan, rubbing your temples, "It was a small town."
"Good," Cindy shrugs, "Make him regret it, or whatever."
she pauses, and her voice drops, some of the hard that radiates off of her melts away for a second.
"I don't see what the big deal is still," she says quietly, "What happened?"
You remember the first time you heard him on the radio.
Driving down a crowded street in Cindy's car (the kind you could never even think of affording) the sun roof down, your hand out the window as the radio blasts, the sun beating down on your hand.
"This is 93.9 playing the hottest hits of the summer! To begin, we have a new single from Kennedy Curse, sure to get stuck in your head. They're new to the scene, but singer-"
Cindy all but squeals, leans forward to turn the dial on the radio up louder, "I love this band. l've been trying to get an interview with them for weeks.”
You snort as you drum your thumbs on the steering wheel, "Can't imagine it would be hard to get an interview with them-"
"Shh!" She hushes you, leans forward and turns the volume up until the car shakes under you.
"Chipped paint, Carol's gonna turn into dust-"
it was a reflex, a knee jerk reaction, something you couldn't stop. before you even knew what you were doing, you were leaning forward in your seat, slamming your hand against the volume button, immediately a silence falls over the two of you.
Cindy knows you've mentioned in passing an ex boyfriend, a singer, but haven't really elaborated on it. Now, it seems like you don't need to.
"So you'll do it?"
Cindy is all but squirming in her seat as she brings you back to the current.
The sigh is all the confirmation Cindy knows, letting out an ear piercing squeal again, "You won't regret it, i promise!"
She gets up to make her an escape, mentions something about transportation-
"I'll do it, but there has to be rules in place-" You're rubbing your temples, a headache already on the horizon, but Cindy isn't listening, long gone as she stops everyone in the hallway to mention the interview with the Kennedy Curse.
Backstage, harry fixes his hair in a broken mirror.
Something about ten years of bad luck, but he rations that's the problem for the person who broke it, not him-
A stage hand, over worked and underpaid, sticks his head backstage: "harry, Ten minutes.
Someone's here to see you-"
And the show is on.
The smirk finds his way to the corner of his lips, and it's game on. the harry who had a panic attack in the back room five minutes ago is long gone, definitely didn't puke into the garbage can earlier because of the nerves. Instead, it's now replaced by the harry he wants everyone to see; confident, cocky, bold-
"Fans already-"
And he rounds the corner and almost hits you with the door.
he speaks first. A reflex, like he's been searching for the name for months or years, waiitng for it to fall onto his lips again-
he speaks before he can stop himself, before he can hate himself for it he speaks before he can stop himself, before he can hate himself for it.
"Birdie."
The low whistle follows, some bird card be always associated with the nickname, for you always singing with him-even if you insisted you were bad.
it falls flat, feels wrong.
Not the cute nickname it was before, when you two would lie in the shared two sized mattress, harry’s feet falling off the edge of the bed, the sheets thrown over both of your heads for security;
“Birdie," he'd say, his voice low, eyelids heavy. even half asleep, the whistle followed, "I promise, to keep your side of the bed warm, always."
Under the sheets was vows between the two of you, the sillier the better, most of the time, but the hushed voices always told the truth.
Instead, you spoke back, his fingers over your lips, calloused from the non stop practicing, the yanking the garage door open at all hours of the night to practice: "I could find you in a crowd."
He laughs; it's lazy and low, like you both have all the time in the world, and he opens his mouth to say something about his height, but it lays heavy in the air as he kisses the crown of your head:
"And i'll always find you, Birdie."
Seeing him is jarring, to say the least.
The last visit was less than good, yelling and tears (from both of you) things said in the heat of the moment that keeps you both up and tossing and turning-
"It's just my normal name now, thanks." You say quickly, hoping it's dark enough backstage that he can't see the red spread across your face.
"Right," he nods, smirks as he leans against the wall, crosses his arms over his chest, "Well, birdie, I gotta say, you got a lot of nerve to wanna hear me sing after you tossed us into the gutter."
You snort, "Still the victim. i see nothings changed."
"Hilarious," he laughs without humor, takes a step toward you, eyes narrowed, that stupid fucking smirk still pulls at the side of his lips, "I see you're still following me around, hm?"
"God, I can't say I missed this. You're still an insufferable asshole-"
"An asshole you paid to see. So tell me, birdie, which of my songs do you like, hm? Still-"
You want to smack the smirk off his face. You dig your fingernails into your palm into you're sure they're going to bleed, leaving little half crescent moons in the middle of your palms, the same ones he use to study, trace over and commit to memory, kiss them better.
In some sick way, you were hoping you'd see each other and he'd apologize, come home-
"I'm just here for the interview," You shake the VIP lanyard around your neck in his face, "And then you never have to see me again."
His eyes dart to the lanyard and back to you, and for a second, he looks almost lost, like something hangs in the air that he wants to say-
"You have five minutes."
You snort, take the pencil from behind your ear,
"I'll make it two. We won't act like these are some deep songs of yours or anything-"
A local nobody band is opening, the drums are heavy and loud backstage, and the ponding begins the second you open your mouth, like it's planned.
harry leans in closer, grabs you by your elbow,
"Let's make a deal, birdie."
You act like you don't hear the low whistle fall out after the nickname.
"Listen-"
he cuts you off, "You listen to us and i'll do the interview, no bitching, after the show. we can go to the bus-"
the look you throw him is irritated and he huffs, holds his hands in the air, "Fine. I'll take you to a fuckin' restraaunt. I'll be on my best behavior, i'll have your manager eating out of your hand after this interview. Scouts honor."
He makes a show of crossing over his heart, holds his hand open in the air.
The smirk never leaves his face, even when your eyes narrow as he sets his hand between you two.
"Deal, birdie?"
You don't speak, eyes narrowed, but your hand slides into his like it never left.
It feels like you're making a deal with the devil.
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breavie · 2 months ago
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oops! all siffrins (isat fic)
part 1
[first] | [next] | [all]
Birdsong coaxes you awake. You can feel the grass around you sway as a soft breeze gently plays with your bangs.
...Something about that was wrong. You crack open an eye. Darkless hair greets your vision. That's wrong, too. You sit up, fully opening your eyes now.
Or eye, apparently. Something's preventing you from opening the other one. Looking down at yourself, you see...
...Why are you wearing Siffrin's cloak?
"—Frin! Siffrin!" your voice calls out. Rapid footfalls alert you to someone's approach.
Ah, right. You had just been on your way to wake up Siffrin, hadn't you? You wanted a second opinion on your sleepover idea, after all!
But wait, you hadn't been the one to say that, so who—
Your eye snaps up to see a figure running towards you.
It's... you??
"Siffrin! What's going on? We did it, didn't we? And you—"
Despite her standing right in front of you now, you have trouble focusing on whatever she's rambling about. And who could blame you? That's you talking at you! Or another version of you? And she thought you were Siffrin? You really don't know what's going on right now.
"—and then you got all big, and—"
And the things she's saying are just... completely nonsensical! Time loops, the end of the world? You don't remember any of that happening to you!
Still, she seems... real, in a way. Like, obviously, you're you. But, she's... also you? She's acting the way you think you would have acted given what she's saying, at least. It's... disorienting, to say the least.
...Not to mention, you just... have a feeling. You don't know how, but you know. She's...
"—and—Siffrin, you remember all of that, right? Siffrin?"
Uh oh, she's waiting for an answer now! What to say, what to say—!
"Are you sure you didn't just have a nightmare, Mira?" you ask. Wow, talking to another you is weird! Still, you can tell that she's stressed. You don't need to worry her about yourself.
And it's not like any of the things she was talking about were even possible! This version of you is probably even more worried about tomorrow than you are, if she was having dreams about it!
A myriad of expressions wash over her face. Confusion, shock, horror... Crab, you didn't help at all!
"Uh, uh—I mean, we're going to be fighting against the King tomorrow, it makes perfect sense to have nightmares like that!" you try to assuage her.
She's staring at you now with a hesitant look of... something. You would think you'd be better at reading your own face.
"...Alright, I guess you might be right..." she doesn't seem fully convinced.
A beat passes where neither of you say anything. Other you seems to be deep in thought.
"Could you, uh, go get Madame Odile and Bonnie for me?" she eventually asks, handing you a piece of paper.
Without looking, you already know what's written on it. You wrote this list too, after all.
"I'll go get Isabeau and check if..." she trails off. You don't know what that was about.
Another beat.
"Anyway," she presses on, "I'll meet you back at the Clocktower with the rest, okay?"
"Sure thing, Mira" you nod, trying to smile a bit. Change, talking to her still feels so... wrong!
As the other Mirabelle walks away, you take a moment to examine yourself a bit closer. Yep, this is definitely Siffrin's body. That's... fine, right? That's fine. Everything's just fine, and there's nothing to worry about!
You should tell someone about this. Get some help, figure things out.
...It'll have to wait. Everyone's already worried about fighting the King tomorrow, you don't need to add to that. Besides, there's already another Mirabelle running around in your place! It's likely that no one would even believe you if you told them.
You can manage for a bit, you think. Just until you beat the King. That wouldn't be too much for you to handle, right? For now, just pretend to be Siffrin. Don't stress out your friends. Easy!
You begin walking to the shop. You've got appearances to keep up after all, Mirabelle.
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gavisuntiedboot · 2 years ago
Text
Just Pretend (Gavi x reader)
Part 1
Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Epilogue
Tinder is not a great place to look for boyfriends, but neither is the workplace.
Gavi x Physiotherapist! reader. Slow burn. I can't make things fast he's gotta work for it. Smut? Not in this part but maybe eventually.
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A/N: Hi everyone! Not super new on Tumblr but I have never been brave enough to post a fic despite my constant maladaptive daydreaming about imaginary scenarios. The stress of being sick and not wanting to write my personal statement have lead me to actually write this and post it online. Please be nice, hope you enjoy!
Song inspo: Just Pretend - Bad omens
Writing inspo: Plot inspired by @zeegaazeegaah and their amazing Gavi x physiotherapist imagine. Other inspirational accounts will be tagged at the end.
TW: None
Word count: 4.8K
"So what do you do?"
y/n hated this question. Even being asked for nudes might be preferable to being asked about her job. y/n had been on 12 first dates since moving back to Barcelona, and without fail every one of them had been ruined by this simple question. She considered lying - she could pass as a student or a waitress or even a model (ok maybe not a model): there were literally thousands of jobs she could pretend to have. But, being the idiot hopeless romantic that she was, she decided to be honest with the man across from her. What if Thiago from Tinder was her soulmate? She didn't want to ruin it by lying.
"I'm finishing my sports medicine and physiotherapy certification, so I am working with one of the football clubs here to do practical training and gain experience."
"Oh that's cool! Which club? You can tell me, I know most of the 3rd and 4th tier Catalan clubs, so I'll probably know it even if it's really small."
Wow. Thiago from Tinder was an overachiever: he messed up before she even said which club she worked for, which was faster than every other man she had been out with in the last four months. y/n took a deep breath and resisted the urge to leave before confessing where she worked.
"I actually work at a pretty well known club... F.C Barca. I think you might of heard of it?" y/n watched this man's jaw visibly drop. His eyes got wide and lit up, like someone had told him he had just won a brand new car.
"You're a physio at Barca?? No way! That's my team! I think I would actually commit manslaughter if Pedri asked me to. So you get to see all the players every day? And Xavi! Have you ever spoken to Xavi? Do you know he won Spain their first world cup? You might be too young to remember. That's so amazing!"
y/n felt all the muscles in her head tense as she focused all her energy on not rolling her eyes. A fanboy. Typical. This was the most common response she got when she said her place of work out loud. 6 of the last 12 first dates had been major fanboys for the club, talking endlessly about how they would steal and kill and get on their knees for Barca. One had even been so bold as to ask if she had ever seen Lewandosky naked, to confirm if some measurements he had seen online were true. While the fans were annoying, the haters were even worse. 4 different dates had said they felt bad that she worked at a "dying club", throwing up football statistics, and going red in the face when she said she could not possibly care less about who had more Champion's League wins.
Then there were those that went out of their way to offend her. You would think that a man trying to get laid would have some more common sense. But that didn't stop one of her tinder matches from calling her a liar in the middle of a restaurant. He was still on his first glass of wine, leaning back cockily in his chair when he said that La Liga would never allow female physios to work with the first team because women couldn't "handle the intensity of football injuries." She should have gotten up and left when he said that, but he was 6'3 with a brand new Porsche, so she let him buy her dinner and drive her home before telling him that she genuinely hoped he never interacted with a female doctor ever again, even if it was to save his life.
The worst had been when she went out with Jose. He had invited her to a pretty expensive spot in central Barcelona. They were having an amazing conversation until the fated job question. She had downed a good amount of wine at that point, and wasn't as cynical about the reaction as she usually would be, so she spoke about her role with pride. Big mistake. He perked up, then threw his head back and laughed. He laughed so loudly it startled the waiter clearing plates from the nearby table. "21 years old and working as a physio for F.C Barca... Who did you have to sleep with to get that job, hm? Xavi? La Porte himself? Or maybe someone at the university? Regardless, you must fuck like a pornstar to have landed a job like that. Can't wait to try it first hand." y/n said some choice words about Jose and his micropenis, and promptly left, seeking to avoid assault charges that night.
The truth was that y/n was extremely talented at what she did. She grew up watching football with her father and brother, developing an interest in working in sports professionally. She worked herself half to death during high school to be accepted into a sports science program in the U.S. She interned with the college teams there, learning about sports injuries and treating them. She finished her program in three years, and despite programs across Europe fighting for her, she came back to Barcelona to finish her physiotherapy certification. She would be lying if she said it was just for her family and friends. The program in Barcelona advertised opportunities to work with F.C. Barca, her favorite football club since birth. It was a love she inherited from her father, as shown by all her childhood pictures in the Blaugrana uniform.
The program was harder than expected. She was one of 7 female first year students, and the only girl in her year that wanted to work with the first team. y/n was made aware that this might work to her advantage now that professional football was pushing for more female representation (in referees, coaching staff, and now on the medical team). The guys in her class either hated her guts or wanted to sleep with her (sometimes both) - it really was like legally blonde without the law.
In the middle of August, close to the beginning of the new season, all the applicants for the Barca placement were called into the university on a Sunday. Their professor introduced Dr. Gonzales, the head physiotherapist for the club. y/n started to sweat despite the air conditioning hitting her directly. She was terrified to even breathe wrong in the presence of this man.
"It's a pleasure to be here with you all today. Thank you for your hard work in submitting to fill the assistant physiotherapist position at F.C. Barcelona. Now, there have been rumors that we are hiring a student to fil this position because it is cheaper and we are broke, but I would like to assure you all now that it's not true."
The two boys in front of her snickered quietly, one whispering a "yeah right" to the other. Dr. Gonzalez looked up at the boys. "You two giggling in the back. You don't seem like the type we need at Camp Nou. You can leave now." Everyone in the room sat up straighter after that. Everyone was on military behavior, not wanting a wrong look or a chair squeak to blow their chance. "As many of you know, one of our strikers, Ousmane Dembélé, presents with consistent right hamstring tightness, leading to frequent injuries."
As Dr. Gonzalez turned to face the screen, y/n found enough bravery to pull out a pen and paper to take notes. The doctor continued to describe the player's condition, his playing style, and the current course of treatment being used. After speaking for 25 minutes (while facing the screen instead of the students), he turned around and addressed them. "Your project is to develop a continuous muscular therapy treatment for Dembélé in the next two days. The best and most cost effective method gets the job placement. You at the back," he pointed at y/n, "Smart choice to take notes. I advise you not to share."
Y/n drove home that evening checking her rear-view mirror every few seconds. The possibility of being followed by one of her classmates so they could steal her notes was low, but never zero, and so she did both of the locks tightly on the door. She sat at her computer and got to work right away. Truth be told, she felt like the whole assignment was kind of a trick. Dr. Gonzalez had told them the current treatment plan for Dembélé, which had obviously been working seeing as they kept using it. She made a few adjustments based on leg dominance and the anticipated excess strain of playing more minutes each game, and then she decided to facetime her friend Angelika while she made the PowerPoint look pretty.
"Good evening Dr. y/l/n, finally ready to ask for my hand in marriage? My parents always wanted me to marry into medicine." y/n rolled her eyes and smirked. She had met Angelika when she was living in the US through a Facebook group for Spanish students studying abroad. Ever since then, not a day had gone by where they hadn't spoken (except once when Angelika had dropped her phone into a pint of beer and couldn't get it fixed for three days).
"You know I'm ready when you are gorgeous, just send your ring size. What're you up to?"
"Nothing much, just scrolling on the internet trying to find clubs that are no cover for ladies tomorrow. You're still coming out with us right?" y/n looked away from her computer and looked at Angelika with the "I'm about to bail on plans look" that was all too familiar. "Y/n!! You cannot be cancelling plans with us again! You haven't been anywhere except your house and the university in like six weeks! People will start to think you're with child and in hiding."
"I didn't know I was the new virgin Mary." y/n quipped, trying to make her presentation equally professional and cute. "You're not, because that would require you being a virgin. I know it feels like it's growing back because you haven't looked in the direction of a man in centuries." y/n could only shake her head. It was not a lack of trying. "Well, I'm presenting to the Barca head physio Wednesday morning, so if you ever want a chance at seeing the inside of that locker room, you need to let me skip out on tomorrow."
Angelika sighed and threw herself on the bed dramatically. "Fine, but you need to be our DD and come pick us up after. Shockingly, it's really hard to order an Uber while drunk." y/n agreed to pick the girls up from the club at the end of the night, an spent the rest of the evening chatting idlily with her friend, living vicariously through the stories she told.
The following day, y/n spent all morning refining her presentation. She spent over an hour watching videos about the Barca training facility to see if there was any equipment she had overlooked in creating her treatment plan. The day progressed as normal - cleaning, cooking, practicing her presentation, watching TV on the couch. As 1am rolled around, she still hadn't received any communication from Angelika. While she was not an inconsiderate person, Angelika did have her moments where she would completely forget about the world around her: that was when she met a man who showed interest in her. Despite being gorgeous and intelligent, Angelika, like most girls in their early twenties, suffered from a condition known as "Nothing is true about me unless an attractive man says it". y/n also suffered (mildly) from this affliction, but being surrounded by weirdos all day in university had helped substantially. She knew that if she did not leave then, she would never get any sleep, and so she grabbed her car keys and headed to the address of the club that she had been sent earlier on.
She parked several blocks away from the club, and called Angelika for a record 41st time. y/n knew she wasn't going to receive an answer, so she changed into a tight satin top and a pair of heels that she always left in her car in case of emergencies (What if Joao Felix decided to take a random trip to Barcelona and she was unprepared?). She could feel the street practically vibrating beneath her as she walked towards the club. She was let in easily - it was a Tuesday night and the establishment needed female patrons. She kept close to the bar, and asked the girls working there if they had seen her friend. Once y/n pulled up a picture of Angelika, the girls laughed to one another.
"Oh yeah, she's up in the VIP section. They've dropped like 6k on bottle service already."
y/n felt the vein in her forehead start to pop out. Of course Angelika had found herself a man that would take her to the part of the club that was the hardest to get into. Especially on the night when y/n really needed to get home. Because why wouldn't that happen? She made her way over to the VIP section, where she was promptly stopped by two large bouncers, who obviously didn't believe that she just wanted to grab her friend. While standing there deciding whether she should just make Angelika order an Uber (or have this new lover order one for her), she was tapped on the shoulder. She turned around and was met by a very attractive man (boy? His age was hard to determine in the dark).
"Hey, do you need to get into VIP? Are you here alone? " "That's a really creepy question to ask a girl in a club." y/n yelled back over the thumping music. What were all these people doing out on a Tuesday? "No not like that. I can help you get in if you want." "I don't really want to get in, I just want to get my friend and leave." The man (boy?)'s eyes lit up. "Perfect! My tea- friend. My friend that I'm with is pretty drunk and the person that drove us is in VIP. I can't leave him by himself because he's kind of rowdy even when sober. Could you watch him while I go grab them?"
y/n didn't want to look too deeply into a good thing, but the offer felt suspicious. She scanned the boy (she had decided that he was young), looking for any indication that he could live up to his end of the bargain. She looked down at his feet, noticing the white Alexander McQueen sneakers. She decided that she could trust him, and if not, she was still in a public place, and someone would notice if she was being dragged out of a club kicking and screaming. She walked over to where the friend was and had to stifle a laugh. Another boy was sprawled across two high bar chairs, legs up and head rolled back. He was wearing a pair of Louis Vuitton sunglasses despite it being the middle of the night and them being indoors. His white button up had the first two undone and the collar popped, like he was Pitbull in 2011. He was in a pair skinny jeans (because, as y/n discovered quickly, everyone in the world had moved on from skinny jeans except for Spanish men) and some white Dolce and Gabanna sneakers. Where were these kids getting all this money?
"Pablo! Look who I brought you! This is..." The first boy looked back at you expectantly. "y/n". "y/n! She's really great and going to take care of you while I go get Pepi so we can go home." The drunk one (now Identified as Pablo) lifted his head, and tilted the sunglasses just enough to get a good look at the girl. "Wow Angel, nice job." The first one (Angel apparently) apologized to y/n, explaining that Pablo was a "really flirty drunk" but that he was never like this sober. y/n showed Angel a picture of Angelika, and off he went back into the beast that was the club. y/n stood awkwardly by Pablo, who appeared to have fallen asleep. Suddenly, he sprung up and asked her, "so what is a pretty girl like you doing in the club by herself?"
"I'm not here to go clubbing, just picking up a friend." "You're dressed like you're going clubbing." "Right, because they wouldn't let me into the club in my scrubs." "Scrubs? You look too young to be a doctor." The music was starting to take a toll on y/n, the thumping rhythm giving her a splitting headache. "You don't look old enough to be let into the club, but everyone is full of surprises." Pablo did not take this comment well. He stood up, feeling all the blood rush to his head as he rested his weight against the bar. He pushed his glasses up his head, and looked straight at her.
This was the first opportunity y/n had to admire how gorgeous Pablo was. The glasses pushed his hair back on his head, showing off his striking eyebrows and cheekbones. His eyes were wide and glassy, making him look like a teenager who had gotten drunk for the first time. For all y/n knew, that could be the case. His nose slopped downward, a subtle bump in the bridge like it had been broken before and reset. His discontent made his bottom lip poke out, and y/n suddenly was overwhelmed by the urge to treat him like a child: make him feel better with a kiss. "I'm 18, and this isn't even my first time in a club. You want to see my ID?" Pablo had gotten much closer to her than she had expected. In her 4 inch heels, y/n was looking him straight in the eyes. He was mere inches away from her face, cheeks flushed from the alcohol and the anger of being called a child. She couldn't stop her gaze from flipping between his eyes to his pouting lips. 'This is normal,' she thought to herself. 'I'm overwhelmed because no man has been this close to me in a while. Even if my scumbag cheating ex was standing this close I would want to kiss him. I am simply in desperate need of affection.'
This internal monologue ended just as another club patron bumped into Pablo, causing him to lose balance. He put his arms around y/n and rested weight against her, head pressed into her shoulder. "I feel like dying. I shouldn't have drank that much." He muttered. She just held him there, scared that he would hit the floor if she shifted. "Then why did you keep drinking?" She asked. It couldn't hurt - in the state he was in, she would be surprised if he even remembered his name in the morning. "So my brain would be a little quieter." y/n's heart ached at the statement. However old the boy in her arms was, he was being burdened by something far beyond his age.
Before she could ask anything else, she was tapped on the shoulder by Angel, who signaled for her to follow out of the club. She put one of Pablo's arms around her neck and began shuffling through the crowd. Once they left the club, Pablo quickly separated from her to throw up on the side of the street. "At least he waited until he was off of you to do that," a male voice echoed from behind her. y/n turned around to see Angelika clinging to a tall brunet. "Thank you so much for carrying her out. I think I can take it from here." y/n said, trying to get Angelika to remove herself from the nice man. "It's ok, I can walk her to your car. It might be easier than you carrying her." y/n smiled apologetically, and turned around to the sound of Pablo continuing to wretch his guts out. She ran over to make sure he wasn't puking blood and didn't need medical attention. "Come on Pablo let's go." Angel said from the curb. "No no, don't rush him. Let him get it all out before he gets into my car. Otherwise he'll have to start taking the city bus to matches." y/n looked up at the new voice. He walked up and stood by Angel, glancing at his phone before looking up at his friend and the girl making sure he didn't die. "Thanks for looking after him. I hope he wasn't too bad, he's a tag aggressive." y/n stood there speechless. The man thanking her for taking care of his drunk friend was none other than Pedri Gonzalez, one of the young stars of F.C. Barca. He was an absolute magician with the ball, and quickly becoming a favorite in y/n's household. She wanted to let out a scream: jump up and down and tell him that she was a huge fan and ask for a picture. But she had her presentation tomorrow. The last thing she needed was to make a bad impression on the player by causing a scene. So she took a deep breath and insisted that it was no problem.
Pablo had finished puking out his guts by that point and stood up straight, gripping his head from the dizziness. "Alright hermano, time to go." Pedri said, turning his back to y/n, Angelika, and the main carrying her. "Wait." Pablo said rummaging through his pocket. He pulled out his wallet, and clumsily pulled a card from it. He turned to y/n and grabbed her shoulder, pulling her close to him. There were shouts from his friends to stop whatever he was doing, but nothing was registering in his liquor-filled brain. "y/n think's I'm a little kid, so I just wanted to show her my ID." y/n shifted her gaze from his deep eyes to the card in his hand. She didn't look at the age. She didn't have to. Her eyes landed on the name: Pablo Martín Páez Gavira. One of the best young football players in the world had just used her as a banister. "Now that you know I'm not a kid, next time, you should let me buy you a drink." Pablo said, pushing a strand of hair from y/n's face before walking (wobbling) back to his friends.
y/n could not process everything going on in her head at that moment. She turned around and faced the man holding a half-asleep Angelika. "You don't play for Barca do you?" She asked, half joking and half fearful. "No. I play for Real Sociedad. I'm Martin." "Zubimendi??" "Yeah." This was too much. y/n, 7 hours before the most important presentation of her life, was surrounded by so much football royalty it made her dizzy. Martin looked like he was going to say something else, but y/n put her finger to her lips and shushed him. "Please, not another word. Just bring her to the car."
They walked silently to y/n's tiny car, Martin helping to carefully place Angelika in the back seat. "So are you the guy she was with while ignoring my calls?" "Oh no, that was my teammate Ander. He was also kind of out of it so I offered to help her out." "Why is everyone getting drunk out of their minds on a random Tuesday in August?" y/n said in frustration, causing a laugh to erupt from Martin. "It's the last week before training for the new season starts. Not a lot of opportunities to black out after this. People like to take advantage." y/n thanked Martin and got into the driver's seat. He stopped her before she drove off. "Do you think I could maybe get your number? Just to make sure you get home safe?" y/n rolled her eyes at the lame excuse for a pick-up tactic, but surrendered her phone number anyway. She drove back to her apartment with her head reeling, as she tried to rehearse her speech in her head instead of thinking of the events of the night.
The next day, y/n looked perfect. She had work her best school-approved scrubs and coat. and slicked her hair back to make her look more professional. She was in her business attire Nikes. Her note cards were neatly written and organized. She sat in the lecture hall waiting to be called on. The students would be presenting in random order. As all the student filled in to present, the tension was palpable. Everyone side-eyed each other, trying to intimidate the "competition". The door swung open and in walked the professor, as well as Dr. Gonzalez. He stood at the front podium, stern as ever, and began to speak.
"Good morning students. Thank you all for the effort you have put into the presentations you will share today. We look forward to all you assessments and insights. As the new season quickly approaches, we want the new assistant to become acclimated to the workplace quickly. Therefore, the decision about the position will be made today following the presentation." The entire room stopped breathing. "In order to do so efficiently, please welcome our other guests and evaluators, Mr. Xavi Hernandez and Mr. Ousmane Dembélé." The pair walked in, and the room engaged in the most "I wish I was dead" sounding clapping known to man. y/n started sweating profusely. If she had known that Xavi and Dembélé were going to be watching her presentation, she would have made Angelika take the Uber. Hell, she would have made her ride a Donkey back home and gotten a full night's sleep.
Dr. Gonzalez drew names for the order, and because y/n has the worst luck, she was presenting last. She did what she does best: panicked immediately. She tried to think of ways to present the information differently than the 6 students before her had. As she listened to the presentations, the more nervous she got. None of the other students had treatment plans remotely similar to hers. Antonio, one of the smartest in their batch and the presenter right before her, even suggested he get surgery.
It was time. y/n stood up at the front of the room and pulled out her slides. "Good morning everyone. Today I will be presenting my comprehensive treatment plan for player Ousmane Dembélé's right hamstring." She got through the whole thing without stuttering or having her knees give out. As she finished her last slide, she let out a sigh of relief. The hard part was over. She asked if their were questions and Xavi's hand went up. "So Miss y/n, the treatment plan presented is very similar to the one we have currently implemented, with a couple changes in training and every day life. What is the anticipated recovery time for this treatment?" Everyone else in the class had said 8-12 months. But no - of course y/n had to be differently. "6 weeks sir." "6 weeks? No one else has given a suggestion that would take less than half a year." "Yes sir, however, if you take into account the availability of daily therapy, cryotherapy, and the current play style and strain distribution, he can be on the field in 6 weeks. He might not be comfortable playing all 90 minutes each game, but that's not the same as being completely out for injury." Xavi nodded and said nothing more. That was the end of the questioning.
It took them 8 minutes exactly to decide who go the job. Dr. Gonzalez, Xavi, and Dembélé came back into the room, thanking everyone again for their hard work. "We are please to announce," Xavi started, "that we will be offering the assistant physiotherapist position for the 2022/2023 season to," he turned to Dembélé, who finished the thought, "Miss y/n y/l/n." All the men in the room turned to face y/n at once as she struggled to breathe from the shock. "We look forward to having you this season."
And that's how it happened. y/n was now the assistant physiotherapist for the first team at F.C. Barcelona during the day, and entertainment for the absolute worst men in Spain in the evenings. She left her disappointing first date with a headache and leftovers, and drove home listening to her "Maybe Love is a Social Construct" playlist. As she walked into her apartment, her phone chimed with a text notification. She let her hair down and grabbed her phone, preparing to update Angelika about the latest in the tragedy that was her love life. Instead, she had two separate text notifications.
[Unknown number]: Hey, is this still y/n's number?
[Gavi]: I need to see you urgently. Tomorrow morning 6:30 am. I'll be waiting outside your office.
To be continued...
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If you got this far, thanks for reading! I have had this idea for a long time and have been writing snippets of it down. I will continue to update whenever I can, as this really is a passion project for me (so it's ok if no one reads it).
GIF credit to @gavidaily
Huge thanks to the following for heavily inspiring me to start writing this on the internet: @missgavi @kyiiansmbappe @julianalvarez9 @milawritesstuff @leeamorgan (there are a couple others I'm forgetting)
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just-an-enby-lemon · 9 months ago
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"I... Of course I had a childhood, Alice!" Gwen complains, trying not to pout. She had tricked herself into believing that her new promotion into external research would've come with some extra respect from her coworkers. It didn't.
Colin only mumbled something about suicidal ideas and "do you know what you're dealing with" before going back to his usal cutting cabbles and threatining the computers. Sam, well, Sam was actually very enthusiastic about the future results of her research. It was quite nice. She honestly didn't care much about Celia. New people often didn't stay and she had no reason to think Celia would just because she was acting creeply non-affected by the whole awfull job of cursed stories ordeal.
And there was Alice. That one was on Gwen. She should've known better than to expect that Alice would change, likely Alice doesn't even know what being respectifull meant.
"A boooring chidlhoold." Alice said, her attention still mostly in her computer scream. Playing solitaire. Somehow Alice managed to find a way to do barely any work and never have any backlog and Gwen had gave up on discovering how.
"It wasn't boring." It really was. Her parents took formality very seriusly and had a tendency to see childrem as small adults. But sometimes they had nice trips and Gwen liked to play office or lawyer. Besides she usually had fun with her cousin, well, when he wasn't using picking her up from school as an excuse to pass by his weed dealer or forgetting her in places. Honestly he was still a better deal than the babysitters. At least for her social life.
Alice raised an eyebrow.
"I was a very well-dressed child." It was not a defense of anything. It was basically a non-sequitor but Gwendolyn needed to protect her family from the insult of having a child with a less than perfect childhood and her mind went blank (probably because of stress. It wasn't really a bad childhood was it?).
"Oh no." Alice said in a ton that was actually sympathetic. "Please tell me your parents didn't force you into formal wear."
It was soo sincere that Gwen sort of broke (and it was just because Alice was rarely sincere and not because the other woman was really attractive in a soft way when sincere).
"My older cousin once told us that if we didn't look presentable we would be switched by an evil regency body hopper." Alice giggled delighted and it was all that was needed for Gwen to keep going. "When I pointed out he was the only one in informal wear he turned to me and told me, as if the biggest secret, that the reason he was always smoking was because the evil georgian tracked bouchards by smell and the weed kept him hidden."
"What a delightfully strange cousin." Alice said. "Maybe your childhood was not all that boring. Maybe it's just you."
Gwen frowed. All the good feelings from before turning into smoke and going slowly away.
"I don't know why I still even talk to you."
Alice opened her mouth, likely to tell another joke. But stopped.
"It was a nice story, Gweeeen, no idea why you told me, specially knowing that now I will want more absurd tales from Tiny Gwen as the blood payement for surviving this place, but it was nice. "
It was an olive branch if Gwen ever saw one.
And even if things never became actually good between them, even if she woke up tomorrow feeling dumb for thinking Alice cared, even if it would make her fantasies of kissing Dyer worse. Gwen took it.
"I have enough stories for it. But don't expect then for free, I'll trade for biscuits, Celia mentioned you have a secret stash."
"Dammit Sam." Alice mumbled but she was smilling.
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